#but the more i think about it...... RAGHHHHH

[t-t-p-d]

ahhhhhh

[witchinatree]

making a list of my favorite quote/ones that stuck with me from each season 1 episode because i feel like it

(i'm starting this after episode 4 but it will be a WHILE before i post it)

episode 1: "bones are a lie peddled by Big Milk" - alice

i love this one because it's a great introduction to alice i think. also it radiates spiral so i hope we get avatar alice not dead alice (isnt there a podcast called alice isnt dead?)

episode 2: "If I wanted to clear the canvas, I would have used turpentine." - statement

this one was just fucking powerful and caught me so off guard like 😶

episode 3: "What would I do without her?" - statement

the norris statement <3 it feels like martin asking what he would do without jon which makes mag200 a lot sadder and i love them

episode 4: "Perhaps you shall prove a stronger will than I, and will yet find it within yourself to destroy this hungry thing of wood and cat-gut." - statement

augustus sighting #1 and we immediately get jonah magnus expressing that it may be possible for gwen bouchard unknown family member to overcome the eye's hunger spooky violin

episode 5: "Voyeur needs to be seen to be believed." - statement

i feel like this one is pretty reflective of how the seasons gonna go? like if you explain the events of tma (mag200 specifically) no one's gonna believe you, it must be seen to be believed!! and also seen!! like the eye!!!

episode 6: "Not sca- This isn’t some poxy blood test, some little pinprick, this is hundreds, thousands of razor sharp points pushing into your flesh." - needles

i love needles so much and i thought this was really funny because it was like "you dont find me scary!! what the fuck!!!" just kind of toddler michael energy

episode 7: "It’s not like we’re wrestling with tape recorders and manila folders." - celia

STOP IT. celia you can't say that you just cannot!!!!!! you Know™ too much maam i cant with you

episode 8: "Pleasure to meet you both. I’m Gerry!"

RAGHHHHH OH MY GOD GERRY!!!! i love him so much and idk how to handle him being alive in the tmagp universe!! gertrude too but idk we got so much of her in tma and not nearly enough of gerry

episode 9: "And honestly, it’s kind of compelling by this point." - sam

they got him 😔😔 the horrors got sam 😔😔 also i found this to be an interesting contrast to jon's heavy resistance in season 1 like he was being compelled but he wasn't going to let anyone know that vs sam "its kinda compelling to trauma dump on this paperwork :]" how is he somehow even more victim material

episode 10: "Gosh you’re sexy, here’s a twenty for your trouble.” - alice

does this count as a quote if shes also quoting what she thinks sam should say? idk anyway i love her i would say that to her if given the chance and it was very silly. i will not be addressing bonzo i am scared.

episode 11: "...Thank you, Alice" - gwen

dyhard dyhard dyhard dyhard dyhard. okay also, the way she CRUMBLED at the idea of anyone doing anything nice for her please someone give her a hug and let it be ME. this series is tossing me back and forth between sam & alice (what is their ship name) and dyhard but this put me back to dyhard

episode 12: "You know it's rude to have absolutely no game?" - alice

she's so fucking funny i need her to be okay so badly!!!! i don't think even tim made me laugh as much as she makes me chuckle and this one really got me. it's hard to write such a comedic character in a podcast since you only have the voice but they really nailed it i adore her

episode 13: "Is it my fault?" - gwen

each of these episodes just reveal a little bit more about how loving and soft gwen is and idk i love her so unbelievably much so seeing that she felt guilt about the bonzo stuff just made her so much more real :(

episode 14: "Christ, they’re in the walls…" - statement

theyre in the walls!!! theyre in the goddamn walls!!!!! anyway that got me because i realized the hole before the statement said it. made more sad than scared tbh

episode 15: "Babies are cool!" - alice this entire interaction between her and sam & celia was so awkward, she is so obvious and i love her anyway

episode 16: "It’s not like I was holding doors open for Mr Bonzo or anything." - gwen my wife is so so so stupid but i adore her AND this gives room for character development. i wish she did not do that though. i love when characters are flawed and have depth but i struggled to get past THIS flaw of hers

episode 17: "Thanks, I guess. Not exactly the same, though, is it?" - celia shes talking TO JON IN THE COMPUTER. SHE KNOWS. i lost my damn mind i love her i love her. get the gay people out of the puter please queen

episode 18: "Why would I need to talk to you? Your work is satisfactory. Unless you have a work-related issue I could assist you with?" - lena solidified my opinion that lena is the best boss to ever have, i adore her and i would want to work for her if she wasn't the boss of Creepy Establishment #1

episode 19: "You’re going to throw it in the fishtank, aren’t you?" - alice colin's behavior is like really worrying BUT i'm glad he's back. i was not convinced he was still alive

episode 20: "I suppose it’s too late for remorse, isn’t it? And why should I be sorry? This is what I deserve!" - ink5oul/statement they reminded me of jon a lot, like especially his season 3/4 transformation when he doesn't quite know everything but he knows he isn't who he was in season 1 anymore, i hope we see more of their life and they can be helped :(

episode 21: [Tape Recorder Bites Ink5oul] - audio description i know it's not technically a quote but this is just so fucking funny. why does it have teeth. what does this mean for the lore. holy shit.

episode 22: "Jonathan Sims and Martin Blackwood" - celia. knawing at the walls of my enclosure i am so not okay. i'm not okay. wtf. wtf. wtf. they're real. wtf.

episode 23: "I had a favorite mug. It said “love you, bitch” and had a picture of a drunk dog on it." - alice. okay i just love this entire interaction because gwen got to open up a little bit and my dyhard heart is so full

episode 24: "I am told that children like me, and I’ve always held the opinion that the world would be a better place if everyone just thought more." - basira. once again this whole interaction was so fun but like idk i loved hearing basira somewhat happy and in a safe place :] my wife <3

episode 25: " I am trying to help, to save us from this goddamned fucking nightmare machine!" - colin. MAN I REALLY WAS ROOTING FOR YOU!!! I WAS SO CONFIDENT YOU WEREN'T GONNA DIE!!!! it's over

episode 26: "I was worrying for a moment that you were Magnussing." - alice. MAGNUSSING BEING CANON MADE ME SAY IT EVEN MORE I'VE SAID IT LIKE TWICE ALREADY

episode 27: "You didn’t tell me the room was labelled, “Archivist.”" - celia. oooooh somebody's got TRAUMAAAAA LMAO

episode 28: "So you’re telling me you know nothing about an OIAR external contract being found with the bodies of two tattooed thugs who met rather grisly ends?" - TREVOR HERBERT???? anyway. ink5oul mention!!!!! i hope they stop killing people it's really rude

episode 29: "Alice, er… we’ve got to talk. It’s important." - teddy. i knew it was over for him but i didn't think it was gonna be THIS bad??? bye babe i guess??? 😭

episode 30: how do i even pick. the whole fucking episode. i can't. i am in a state of shock. i need to lay down for 30 years.

[creampuff-nonanon]

Hello are your requests open?

If so, may I request sub Scaramouche/wanderer x kinda clingy or just very affectionate reader who hugs/kisses him a lot and accidentally makes him flustered? Can be nsfw 🤭🤭🤭

If you aren’t accepting requests, please feel free to ignore! 😚

The Balladeer Wanderer x Reader

☆— I HOPE YOU'RE READY FOR WHAT I'M 'BOUT TO DO <3

☆A/N: RAGHHHHH RAGHHHHHH RAGHHHHH *horny roars*

☆Warning/Notes: ARCHON QUEST SPOILERS!!! NSFW UNDER THE CUT, Minors idgaf give me clout/hj but fr though being horny is normal ig, No gender specified for reader

⋆ Before he got his older memories back he was just a wanderer, then he met you.

⋆ Achievement unlocked!

⋆ "simp-ly in love with you"

⋆ He loved your hugs and kisses

⋆ Clings on to you like a bear

⋆ But when you both encountered traveler and got his memories back...

⋆ "Ahhhh I knew I wouldn't fight some metal head. Who would've thought. Does this count as enemies to lovers?" You questioned as if he- no, Scaramouche didn't almost kill you.

⋆ He was quite shocked that you were still the same even after all of that.

⋆ He felt embarrassed, ashamed, head over heels (again) all at the same time!

⋆ he's quite confused, he knew you understand what he went through but damn you a lil too loyal😭

⋆ everytime your lips pecks his cheeks, the way you give warmth to his cold body, the way you intertwine your hands with his.

⋆ He felt at ease... Until Nahida wanted to spend time with you both.

⋆ Oh god not lesser lord Kusanali

⋆ Oh god you're still affectionate

⋆ oh god oh lord oh barbatos-

⋆ You were talking about your recent interest but stopped when you noticed Nahida's eyes on him.

⋆ He was looking away from the both of you.

⋆ "I think I got it!" Huh?

⋆ "This reaction, it's called "flustered" isn't it?" Ohhh

⋆ "Yes Nahida" you replied, "Want me to show you one more example of this reaction?"

⋆ The boy panicked

⋆ "wait no-"

⋆ "Hope you're ready for what I'm 'bouta do <3." You said attacking him with kisses, Nahida giggling

⋆ "ACK WAI–"

–NSFW TIME

Kinda sucks tbh

Warning: praise kink, use of "good boy" once, implied dacryphilia, use of "ma'am/sir" on reader

No genitals mentioned for reader

You know, the classic Creampuff anon combo

⋆ oh god.

⋆ you.

⋆ YOU.

⋆ You made him weak.

⋆ You had him wrapped around your fingers (maybe literally too LMFAO)

⋆ When you place your hands on his thighs.

⋆ When he feels your hot breath on his shoulders.

⋆ The way you look at him with half-lidded eyes.

⋆ The way you pepper kisses on his palm as he grinds on you.

⋆ The way you call him a "good boy" for taking it all.

⋆ My guys a walking "me when yio, uou me when, when I, when"

⋆ "Hahh.. ma'am/sir.. feels good s'good.." he tells you, almost out of breath

⋆ You simply kissed his lips, not stopping.

⋆ "Look at you. You look so beautiful like this."

⋆ He was gonna cry, in a good way!

⋆ The sensation mixed with your praises made him dizzy

⋆ "I'm gonna cum, please ma'am/sir let me cum, pleasepleaseplease– mph!" you kissed him, going faster.

⋆ He whines, back arched as white strings of his cum came out.

⋆ "HHhhah Y/N... thank you I- I love you.."

⋆ after cleaning yourself and him up, you placed him on your lap.

⋆ Humming, you brushed your fingers through his hair, taking care of the knots after this night.

[shmowder]

I also love daniil having to learn how to show love. like. it comes so easily to his s/o and he wants to return it because why does he feel so warm and safe?? what the hell magic are you doing to make him lower his guard and struggle to find the words?? but he can only really express his love through latin phrases that can’t have the meaning fully translated, or the words he uses come off as being sharp and he doesn’t understand why you don’t get that he loves you.

so he keeps trying and does his best to practice love. he studies how you do it, just like he studied in school. studying and analyzing feels normal to him, he’s comfortable watching you reach for his hand as you walk down the street, or link arms with him when there’s a crowd of people and you get nervous about being away from him. and as time goes on, your actions feel intuitive to him. you don’t need to ask him to hold you, he just sees the look on your face and it all makes sense in his mind. and to see you smile again, like how you did when he put his hand on your back to lead you in the right direction, he’d trade anything for that.

I just love his character so much. someone so knowledgeable and smart, someone so full of love and determination, learning how to show it all through trial and error.

I especially love it in contrast to how artemy shows love, how easily it comes to him, how easy it is for him to give and receive physical affections.

raghhhhh I just love it all. I could go on about how they specifically show affection and love, ESPECIALLY in front of other people, let me know if u want me to ramble about it aaaaaa

love u!! -🥀

I definitely would love to hear more of your thoughts about it! This is a great analysis of his character.

To learn how to love you, properly love you rather than just expect you to b content with what you have.

Because Daniil never settles for less, he always goes above and beyond, he puts in effort in everything he does. From his appearance to his work and even personality, you think he memorised all those Latin phrases effortlessly or on a whim? No. He took them seriously and still brush up on his language every now and then just to have the right to qoute them at people.

So why would he ever approach loving you, the most important person in his whole life, with any less effort?

Love comes naturally to Artemy, it's an instinct in a way. He never had to struggle for it, that's why it's difficult for him to accommodate you if you happen to prefer a different love style that's more traditionally romantic.

Artemy follows his heart, his gut feeling, and the way he shows his love has always been the same. Domestic and authentic, sincere and down to earth rather than grandiose or passionate.

While Daniil always had to learn from scratch, he's a candle that never burns out. Fueled by his determination and ambition, if mediocrity is unacceptable in his work, then why in hell would he ever allow it in his own personal love life? He learns what you like, what you value, and how you'd rather be shown affection and follow along.

Akin to learning the steps in a new dance, to the melody of your heart.

[mackmp3]

RAGHHHHH OKAY OKAY so first beforeee I forget I got a Dr who shirt!!!!!! it has ten and 11 on it raghhhhhhhhhhhhh

okay now for business my reaction to the new Doccy whomst trailer; CRAZY?????? the are just priming ruby for tragic companion things - so soooooonnnn its actually got me wondering whether they went that haha....something bads gonna happen to themmmmm in the trailers for season 4... hrm

but aLSO the Beatles moment walking across the crossing?????? also is Jonathon groff the master???????? I low key saw that person form the trailer with the bright orange hair and like stripey suit and kind of prayed it was them so that we have a more interesting master again

and yeah those are my thoughts :DDD

oh hell yeah nice shirt hehehe i want a tardis pin for my bag

YEAGH ruby is going to have So Many Things happen to her OH they dropped episode titles too - there's one called 'the legend of ruby sunday' RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I CANT WAIT AJHSAJSAS SO MUCH SHIT IS GONNA HAPPEN TO HER idk if you caught it theres a bit where ruby and the tardis fade away LIKE AHSGNHANG (to be honest i only saw that in a gifset later hehe) i am so so so ready for her arc ashajsnhkn she is going to be psychologically damaged yay yippee

and YEAH the beatles moment hehe i am so ready to see the doctor whomst take on sixties music i know a lot about the beatles but to be honest if the historical accuracy is non existent it'll be funny yknow? and YEAH THE PERSON W/ ORANGE HAIR idk who they are but i am so ready to find out they seem so fabulous - it would be kinda fun if they were a new villain but idk it might be someone else they've brought back from classic who like they did with the toymaker that would be interesting too - i saw someone saying that jonathan groff might be playing a younger version of jack harkness?? which is an interesting theory. but i am SO READY FOR THE NEXT MASTER GONNA BE HONEST I LOBVE THEM THEY'RE SO UNHINGED :DDDDDD SERIES FOURTEEN I CANT WAITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

^^ thinking about doctor who moodboard

[smidgen-of-hotboy]

Two parts, one day- Two Jay's Thoughts: Extended Cut, one day- LETS GO!!

We learn a two things:

Juno probably isn't one to often remember his dreams

Nureyev has insomnia

"Juno trusted him" which is VASTLY different than the Juno we know from canon, who did not trust Rex Glass, who did not want to trust Peter Nureyev, who had to trust Duke Rose.

We learn some more things:

Buddy (as has been established) is a heavy drinker, possibly alcoholic. (I will be characterizing her as one, mark my words)

Jet is at the bar, and he works as a bouncer. Which makes sense. He is "The Big Guy".

Bud calls on Jet when things are dire. So she trusts him.

And Jet has experience handling shipments and pirates. This I think is a fun detail because I had to reread the Tools of Rust transcript for a quote and M'Tendere mentions that Jet was a smuggler during the War.

"wore her heart and its many thoughts on her sleeve like a badge of honor for her humanity" IT IS ABOUT THE HUMANITY!! IT'S ABOUT TRUST!!! AND LOVE!!

also we learn that Rita is an ugly crier. nice. (same girlie pop, same)

"Juno had known her for years, and she had never stopped talking once." PRO YAPPER ALERT!! but seriously, when the bubbly best friend goes quiet and things turn dark for them, shit has hit the fan. repeat: shit has hit the fan!!

Rita drinks milk. I- as a lactose intolerant boy, tummy ache girlie- can't relate. smh.

Buddy croaking = my hc that she is surprised she even remembers what a frog's croak is anymore. winter has been here so long...

"Rita, look at me. Rita. DAMMIT, I need you to tell me what happened to him." oooooooOOOOOO- Juno's scared. he's on edge here. hackles raised. his heart has already dropped to ground, already in his feet. he knows what's coming. he doesn't want to hear it. he has to. (on a personal note: my cat got seriously sick 3 years ago, my parents were driving home early from their vacation to deal with it, and the whole time i was waiting for them to come home, my heart was in my feet. on the ground. I told my partner at the time "they're not telling me something" and sure enough- he was gone. i already knew what was coming, already knew the truth, i just didn't want to hear it.)

RAGHHHHH- I FORGOR THAT HE DESCRIBED ALL THAT- "And then he realized. He knew that expression. It was nearly second nature to him. He had seen it every morning on his own face in the mirror after Benten had- And then he knew." FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

"No. No it can't-" Denial.

LADIES AND GENTS AND ALL- WE'VE REACHED WAIT FOR ME!!!!!!

"Rita said he called your name." = "She called your name before she went"

"And Juno didn't even hear him. He hadn't been paying attention. How long had he been calling? How long had Juno been ignoring him?" = "But I guess you weren't listening"

"He couldn't remember the last time he had felt so horrible about himself." juno didn't feel like shit all the time with Nureyev, he was motivated to fix spring because of Nureyev. augggggh- writing about juno's depression will never not be cathartic for me in some way

"before a different wave of feeling crept over him" ANGER.

"He was going to get his husband back if it was the last thing he ever did." has me thinking about Olivia Rodrigo "i wanna get him back" lol

"Jet nodded sagely. [he doesn't WANT to tell Juno anything about this] "This is true. I walked that road with a friend of mine years ago, trying to save people from unwise decisions.'" [FRIEND?? WHAT FRIEND JET??]] (i know who, you know who Zeph, no one else does and they'll just have to wait and see lol)

"Buddy looked at Juno again, an odd kind of hollow despair marking her face, like she saw something in Juno's set jaw and bright eyes that made her want to disappear. [oh- oh Bud- Zeph you almost make me feel guilty for the things I'm going to do to her. almost.] "I know what you're thinking, Juno, and it won't work. I've tried. Believe me.'" [ALMOST.]

"There was a defiant flame rising in him now, melting the shards of his broken heart back into a semblance of hope." This line takes on a whole new meaning after the discussion we had earlier today lol. smth smth tho- about the shards of his heart reminding me again of Glass but also for some reason the Chimes? From Freedom in Chains?

"How far are you willing to go for your husband?'" = "Just how far would you go for her?"

"'To the ends of the fucking earth.'" = "To the end of time/ To the end of the earth" FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK (also again with the fire, "The flame grew into a wildfire." eheh- ahahahhaahha- stg you silly kids are going to hate me for what I'm cooking, Zeph is biting me it's that evil.) (also also, "Wait for Me" is one of my favorites. so fucking good. so lovesick. so fucked. so doomed by the narrative.)

JET ON GOD BROTHER- "'Very well then. Pack your things. I will take you to where the road to Hadestown begins. If you are going to make stupid choices, I will at least make sure you can begin making them safely.'" </3 hits harder and harder (again) knowing what I have planned

and BUDDY BABE!! She's walked that road Juno, she's tried, and failed! she- YEAH EXACTLY JET!! "'And yet you took the same course of action all those years ago, Buddy. What does that say about you?'" IT'S HER TRAUMA!! IT'S HER FEAR!! HER COPING!! SHE FOUND THIS FAMILY AND STITCHED IT TOGETHER AND SHE CAN'T LOSE ANYMORE, NOT ANYMORE, PLEASE DON'T TAKE HER ONLY REMAINING FAMILY AWAY!!

Juno the deer in the headlights- Buddy bitter and resentful for ~mysterious reasons~- Jet stern, yet passing minimal judgment on Juno but heavier judgment on Buddy- AND RITA!! the bestest bestie of best friends RITA!! can't go leaving her out, or leaving her behind!

"'Wait for me, Mista Steel! I'm comin' too!'" = "Wait for me, I'm coming/ Wait, I'm coming with you" FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK- this hurts me so much to have Rita being the one begging for Juno to wait, wait for her, she's coming with you. i love that you gave her this line. it fits. it works.

"Hang on, Nureyev. Just a little longer." PODCAST REFERENCE!! can't be bothered to find the episode it's from but I know it's from the podcast i would know that juno-ism anywhere (and if it's not a quote, then damn!!! you got me fooled)

"He was getting his husband back. At any cost." :) :)) ::))))

SONG FOR A CAGED LOVEBIRD: PART 9 (?)

i've lost track by now ngl. we're at over 9,000 words so i get a pass. this part is. ouchie central. so i am expecting a lot of people yelling at me in the comments and tags. this is fun for me.

LETS GO TPP CREW, ROUNDING THE CORNER WITH MY TPP CREW: @smidgen-of-hotboy @ceaseless-watchers-special-girl @urjover @one-joe-spoopy @waters-and-the-wilde @demonic-panini (@the-private-eye i'm tagging you too bc i can :))

The silence was what finally woke him.

Juno had been solidly asleep, dreaming about things he couldn’t quite remember but that made his stomach twist. When he finally opened his eyes, the room was abnormally quiet. No rain, barely any wind, and… he rolled over to check. Nureyev wasn’t next to him in bed. That was not entirely out of the ordinary, as his insomnia often took him on long walks through the woods as he tried to find sleep, but this morning it set his teeth on edge. Something about it felt…  wrong. Like he had walked out of the door for the last time, and would never come back. 

Juno shook the thought away. It was a ridiculous notion. He loved him too much to let that happen. If Nureyev was having trouble, or looking to leave, he would have told him. Juno trusted him.

He dressed and washed his face and walked downstairs to grab some breakfast before starting to get the bar together for opening. Hopefully, the rest of the day would pass without incident, and he could chalk this nauseous, nervous feeling up to a nightmare that he couldn’t quite remember.

It was what he saw at the bar while half-way down the stairs that really made him feel sick to his stomach.

Buddy was leaned over a half-empty bottle of whisky, rubbing the bridge of her nose, tear tracks shiny on her face. That bottle had been full when he had replaced it on the shelf last night. She never drank this early in the morning, and never that much. Always said it made her unfit to serve the public or interact with any decent human being. Jet, the man she had employed as a bar bouncer when times were better, was standing next to her, a large hand on her shoulder. He was crying too. Buddy only called him when things were drastic, like when their latest whiskey shipment had been stolen by pirates on its way to the bar.

And then there was Rita.

Rita, who wore her heart and its many thoughts on her sleeve like a badge of honor for her humanity, was nearly silent. She was snot-nosed and puffy-eyed, like she had been crying for hours, and said absolutely nothing outside of the occasional sniffle and a quiet request for Jet to grab her a glass of milk from the kitchen.

Juno thought he might hurl right there on the stairs. A silent Rita was new. Juno had known her for years, and she had never stopped talking once.

What the hell had happened?

He cautiously came down the rest of the stairs and approached the bar. Buddy looked up at his approach and tried to wipe some of the tears from her face just as Jet returned from the kitchen with the milk for Rita. “Good morning, Juno.”

“Hey, big guy,” Juno responded, nodding in Jet’s direction before looking at each one of the weeping figures in turn. “What happened? You guys look like hell. Did we get another snowstorm in the middle of the night or something?”

The three of them exchanged a look that Juno couldn’t quite decipher before Buddy answered.

“I think Rita can answer that question better than Jet or I can,” she croaked before downing another swig of whisky.

Juno turned to Rita and reached out to wipe a stray hair out of her face. “Hey, Rita, what happened? It’s okay, it can’t be that bad, right?”

At that, Rita burst into tears again. “It is, it really is that bad, Mista Steel! You don’t get it! It’s the worst thing! It’s about Mista Nureyev!”

Juno’s heart dropped through the floor the second she said his name. “Rita. Rita, look at me. Rita. DAMMIT, I need you to tell me what happened to him.”

Rita looked at him then, with such a look of despair and heartbreak on her face that Juno’s heart ached for her. And then he realized. He knew that expression. It was nearly second nature to him. He had seen it every morning on his own face in the mirror after Benten had-

And then he knew.

He breathed in, breathed out. Took a step back. The floor was spinning. He dropped to his knees. “No. No it can’t- no, no, no, no, this can’t be right, Nureyev can’t be…”

Rita nodded, tears still flowing steadily down her face as she clambered off the bar stool to hug Juno. “He came back after dark last night, and I thought he was actin’ real sketchy, so I watched him for a while, and then when the sun started comin’ up, he packed up some stuff and left, but I followed him, only he didn’t know, ‘cause I acted real sneaky-like, and he went to a train station that I’m pretty sure wasn’t there before, and he met these big, creepy guys, and they gave him paypawork to sign, ‘cause I think they were makin’ some kinda deal, and once Mista Nureyev signed it, he fell down and started coughin’, and then one of the big guys said somethin’ about not havin’ enough time to wait for him to die, and then the otha one pulled out a huuuuuge knife, and then he- then he-”

She burst into sobs again on Juno’s shoulder. His ears were ringing and he knew his face was deathly pale. This wasn’t real. It couldn’t be real.

Buddy looked at him hollowly from the bar. “Rita said he called your name. It was the last thing he did before he… before they loaded his body up onto a train and left.”

‘He called your name. It was the last thing he did before he died.’ And Juno didn’t even hear him. He hadn’t been paying attention. How long had he been calling? How long had Juno been ignoring him? Why was he only now hearing his echo instead of his voice? How pathetic was he, that he prioritized a fucking song over his husband? What was wrong with him? But of course, as soon as he realized his problem, it was already too late to solve it. 

He never got to say goodbye.

Dimly, Juno realized he was shivering and tears were flowing down his face and Rita was apologizing profusely that she didn’t do anything to try and save him. He couldn’t remember the last time he had felt so horrible about himself. 

Now, it was all over. He’d lost him forever, and it was all his fault.

He would never get to see Peter Nureyev again.

He sat there, curled up on the floor for a moment longer before a different wave of feeling crept over him.

No.

No.

This was not the end. He wouldn’t let it be the end.

He was going to get his husband back if it was the last thing he ever did.

He sat up, wiped the tears from his face, and grabbed Rita by the shoulders, lightly shaking her out of her self-deprecating ramble.

“Rita. Rita, look at me. I need you to tell me everything you know about the Underworld. It’s important. Really important.”

“Well,” Rita sniffled, wiping her face on the sleeves of her sky blue sweater, “I heard a while back about there bein’ a back door. A way to get in without havin’ to actually, ya know, die or somethin’.”

Jet nodded sagely. “This is true. I walked that road with a friend of mine years ago, trying to save people from unwise decisions.”

“It’s not easy though, Mista Steel. The road is reeeeeaaaaally long and difficult, and with the weatha bein’ the way is it, you could get caught in a storm and get hurt, and I don’t want you to get hurt, Mista Steel!!”

Buddy looked at Juno again, an odd kind of hollow despair marking her face, like she saw something in Juno’s set jaw and bright eyes that made her want to disappear. “I know what you’re thinking, Juno, and it won’t work. I’ve tried. Believe me.”

“I’m not going to give up on him this easily.” There was a defiant flame rising in him now, melting the shards of his broken heart back into a semblance of hope. “I can get him back. I know I can.”

Jet walked over from his perch next to Buddy and crouched on the floor next to Juno. “Rita is right, Juno. The road to Hadestown is not an easy one to take, which is why I must ask you: how far are you willing to go for your husband?”

The flame grew into a wildfire. 

“To the ends of the fucking earth.”

There was silence as Jet examined him for a moment longer, face expressionless, before letting out a small sigh and standing up again. “Very well then. Pack your things. I will take you to where the road to Hadestown begins. If you are going to make stupid choices, I will at least make sure you can begin making them safely.”

Buddy started shaking her head vehemently. “No, no, no. You can’t let him go, Jet darling, he’s just going to get himself killed too. It’s not safe.”

“And yet you took the same course of action all those years ago, Buddy. What does that say about you?”

A muscle in Buddy’s jaw twitched as she took another long swig of whiskey. Juno slowly stood up, like a prey animal caught between two predators trying to remain ignored. He desperately wanted to know what had happened between the two of them, but somehow got the impression that any requests to know would be soundly ignored. 

Buddy glared at Jet with one sharp eye, but said nothing.

Jet sighed again and put a large hand on Juno’s shoulder. “Go grab your things. We will leave in two hours.”

“Wait for me, Mista Steel! I’m comin’ too! I gotta go get my stuff and then I’ll go with ya! Lil old Rita isn’t as fast as she used to be! Wait up!”

Juno sprinted up the stairs, Rita’s voice carrying after him. And in spite of the loss he had just suffered, he was grinning.

Hang on, Nureyev. Just a little longer.

He was going to get his husband back. At any cost.