#but the mines are funny and funny >>>> anything else

[larluce]

Arthur and Merlin travel back in time without knowing the other is from the future too AU (SERIES 2)

FIRST PART (SERIES 1) >> PREVIOUS PART >> NEXT PART

(Sorry for the delay. This part is going to be a bit crazy)

Merlin has never been able to stay mad at Arthur for too long, so he soon finds himself back in Arthur's chambers and stays there the rest of the day, lying in bed, while Arthur pampers him.

Being taken care of is a pretty new feeling for Merlin. And, though sometimes it still feels weird, he doesn't get that feeling of wrongness anymore when Arthur brings grapes to his mouth and massages him to help him relax. If anything, he deserves this after the uncomfortable moment Arthur put him through.

As night falls and Arthur cuddles with him, Merlin can't help but wonder: What did he do to be this fortunate in this life? To get this Arthur to love him so throughfully and cherish him this much? Some fear invades him too: Is this a trick of The Sidhe? To get him everything he ever wanted to later take it all away from him. But then Arthur tells him "I love you" again and dissipates his fears with a kiss.

Merlin spent all his previous life suffering and worrying constantly. In this life, he'll let himself be happy.

Arthur: (his hand trails down Merlin's body as he kisses him)

Merlin: (pulls away from the kiss, breathless) Wait... We shouldn't...

Arthur: Why? (kiss) You are my lover. (kiss) I already made you mine yesterday. (kiss)

That is other thing. While Merlin is still processing the new nature of their relationship, Arthur assimilates it and his active role in it with ease. It disorients and overwhelms him, the intensity of how Arthur shows his love. Merlin doesn't recall a single time Arthur has been this possessive with Gwen, let alone Arthur making jealous scenes like the one he did with Gwaine moments before. It makes him nervous... but also hot for some reason.

Merlin: (stops the kiss, though he still blushes, a mix of embarrasment and arousal at Arthur's words) My offended lover act. I'm supposed to be avoiding you for two weeks, remember? If we do it everyone will know and think I forgave you too easily.

Arthur: We'll be discret.

Merlin: My limp won't be so discret.

Arthur: I'll be gentle.

Merlin: (looks doubtful)

Arthur: Please. (hand caresses his waist, hip and then his thight) You can't tell me you don't want it. (lips very close to Merlin's)

Merlin: (gives in, beacuse gods he wants this so bad) Alright, but just once. And be gentle.

Time skip. Next day in the morning.

Merlin: (Wakes up and whimpers in pain) You fucking liar! 😡 (hits Arthur with a pillow)

Arthur: (chuckles softly) Again, you weren't exactly complaining.

Merlin: (doesn't want to admit he was in fact enjoying it too much to stop him) Well, now I am, you brute clotpole! How am I supposed to go for your breakfast now?

Arthur: That can be arranged. (calls out) Guards!

Guards: (enter, weapons up) My lord!

Merlin: (startled, barely has time to react, just covers himself with the covers)

Guards: ...

Guard 1: (looks away in respect) Uhm... Did you call us, sire?

Arthur: (very chill) Tell the cook to send someone else to bring my breakfast, please.

Guard 2: (also looking away) Right away, my lord.

Guards: (leave)

Merlin: (uncovers himself, almost shouting) Why did you do that?! 😡

Arthur: (innocently) You said you couldn't bring breakfast.

Merlin: You know what I mean, you prat! We were supposed to be discret! Now everyone will know- (cuts himself, opening his eyes wide in realisation) And that's what you wanted. You did it on purpose! (gets off the bed furious despite the pain)

Arthur: (gets off the bed too) Merlin-

Merlin: (dressing himself with hard movements, furious) NO! You think this is funny? Letting them see me in your bed as if I was some harlot? Do you know how humiliating that is?

Arthur: I didn't think-

Merlin: Of course you didn't think! But you knew how important this plan was to me and you still didn't care. You trampled on my wishes as if they were worthless. As if I didn't matter (hurt emerges into his fury) How could you do that to me? (finishes to dress himself)

Arthur: (realising how much he fucked up, very sorry) You are right. I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry. (about to put a hand on his shoulder)

Merlin: Don't! (makes a move to go to the door)

Arthur: (puts himself infront of him) I'm really sorry!

Merlin: I don't want to hear it! (darts around him, but ends up tripping with a blanket and ends with his face on the floor) Stupid blanket! (his eyes glow and the blanket ends in little pieces)

Arthur: (swallows, thinking) Even his magic is angry, he must be really upset (aproaches carefully, kneeling before Merlin) It was never my intention to step over you and I hate myself for making you feel that way.

Merlin: (very hurt) Then why did you do it?!

Arthur: (sighs) I wasn't honest with you.. regarding your plan.

Merlin: ... What?

Arthur: I was never comfortable with it. It hurts to pretend that we are separated when that's not true. And you involved me in this plan before even consulting it with me first and then make me go along with it. You never once asked my opinion on the matter either. It made me feel like you care more about some rumors than me, as if our relationship was something to be embarrased of. And it is not! If anything, I'm proud to show you off, to let everyone know that I love you and you are mine.

Merlin: (calms down a bit, feeling bad, but still angry) You are right, that was selfish of me and I apologise if I made you upset, but what you did was not better. Is one thing to "show me off" and other to expose me naked in your bed after being intimate! And how dare you say I'm embarrased of us? Me trying to recover some of my dignity has nothing to do with that! If you were so against my plan you should have said something instead of making me look like an easy lay!

Arthur: (caressess Merlin's face) I know. I was childish and impulsive. I'm sorry. I'll never discard your wishes ever again. Relationship is a two-way street. If we are not okay with something we talk it out from now on. Alright? Will you forgive me? (offers Merlin a hand to help him stand up)

Merlin: (just stares at him, still frowning, resentful)

Arthur: I'll tell everyone I gave you a very big apology gift and that's why you forgave me.

Merlin: So now I'm not a cheap whore, but a expensive one.

Arthur: (desperate) Then tell me what to do to make you forgive me! Anything and I'll do it!

Merlin: (keeps staring at him, frowning)

Arthur: (begs) Please! I'm so so sorry. Tell me how to make it right. (holds Merlin's hands, pleading) Please.

Merlin: (sighs, giving in cause Arthur looks like he might cry if he is not forgiven and Merlin really doesn't like making Arthur this upset) My lily is lonely. I want another.

Arthur: (relieved) Sure!

Merlin: And I want it to be white.

Arthur: I'll get it for you right away. (hugs Merlin and gives him a kiss) Are we okay now?

Merlin: (thinking) I'm still angry and hurt that you put me in such a vulnerable position, but what's done is done. And I can see you are really sorry, why waste time fighting? (smiles, reassuring) Yes, we are okay.

Time skip. In Gaius' tower.

Merlin: (enters, limping)

Gaius: (worried) My boy! (grabs a little bottle and gives it to Merlin) Take this for the pain. Shouldn't you be resting?

Merlin blushes, very embarrased, because of course Gaius knows. Everyone in the castle knows. If the limp and guards catching him on Arthur's bed wasn't enough of a clue, all the visible bites Arthur left on his neck definitely are. Not even his neckerchief is able to hide all of them.

Merlin: Thank you. (drinks Gaius's potion for the pain) I can still help you around here as long as I don't have to move much. (grabs some herbs and jars with liquids and puts them on a table) It's the least I can do after losing your ingredients yesterday. (sits on a chair, wincing a bit)

Merlin frowns at the memory of Arthur and Gwaine's display from the day before (in which he lost his cest with all the ingredients he had collected). It's difficult to concieve a world where Arthur and Gwaine don't get along, let alone one when they hate each other to guts.

Merlin: (thinking, reassurring himself) They just have to stop acting like cave men and get to know each other. I'm sure they'll become friends again soon enough.

Gaius: You don't have to worry about the missing ingredients. Someone else brought them.

Merlin: (surprised) Really? Who?

Gwaine: (comes out from Merlin's old room) Me.

Merlin: (avoids his gaze, still angry at him for yesterday and starts to grind some herbs)

Gaius: Oh, Gwaine. What a surprise seeing you here. I thought you'll be at a tavern by now.

Gwaine: (to Gaius, but not getting his eyes off Merlin) Hungover.

Gaius: (shakes his head) I'll prepare you something for that. (about to that)

Servant: (enters) The King requests the presence of the physician inmediatly. Something about needing his concoction.

Gaius: (sighs) Of course. (turns to Merlin) Prepare Gwaine's medicine for the hungover, I'll tend the king. (leaves)

Merlin: (sighs, thinking) Perfect.

Gwaine: (walks around the table, grinning) So... Merlin, isn't it?

Merlin: (ignores him, smashing the herbs, still not looking at him)

Gwaine: I can help you with that if you want (about to grab a bowl)

Merlin: (puts the bowl away and keeps smashing in silence)

Gwaine: (notices Merlin's love bites on his neck, chuckles and decides to joke) The prince was eager to mark territory, it seems.

Merlin: I'll finish this in my room. (stands up, grabing his things)

Gwaine: No, wait! (stops him) Forgive me. It was a bad joke.

Merlin: (leaves the things on the table and crosses his arms) Is that the only thing you are sorry for?

Gwaine: I may have also crossed the line with your prince yesterday.

Merlin: And?

Gwaine: And I'm sorry.

Merlin: As you should. (sits again and continues to prepare Gwaine's medicine)

Gwaine: (sits besides him) I know we had a rocky start. Two rocky starts if we count the Lady Merelyn one. But I would really like to be your friend.

Merlin: (confused) Why? (thinking) We bonded before due to our similar pasts. He doesn't know about my father yet. Why does he...?

Gwaine: (grinning, amuzed) Are you kidding? You are the most interesting person I ever met! There's always people telling so many stories about you they even contradict each other. It's madness! But the kind of madness I like. And the little time I spent with you was explendid.

Merlin: You mean the bandit attack and your almost confrotation with Arthur?

Gwaine: What can I say? You are a magnet for trouble... and I love trouble. 😏

Merlin: (rolls his eyes, but can't help but smile)

Gwaine: So? (extends his hand) Friends?

Merlin: (thinking) I do miss his friendship... (says) Alright, but only with two conditions.

Gwaine: Isn't friendship supposed to be unconditional?

Merlin: (warns) Gwaine.

Gwaine: Fine, Fine. Tell me. What are the conditions?

Merlin: One, you'll stop talking bad about Arthur in my presence or his presence.

Gwaine: Noted. (thinking) I can still talk bad about him with Percival.

Merlin: Two, you'll never EVER bother Arthur again in any way. This means no insults, no fights and no fake flirting with me just to get on his nerves.

Gwaine: (nods) Understood. No insults, no fights-wait, did you say fake flirting? 😧

Merlin: (extends his hand) Do you accept the conditions?

Gwaine: (shakes Merlin's hand) I accept.

Meanwhile. Arthur and Lancelot in the woods.

Lancelot: I found some, Sire! (points some white lilies)

Arthur: (aproaches) Just now?

Lancelot: Yes. What a relief! After you told me how long your search for the purple lily was, I thought it would take longer.

Arthur: It did take longer.

Lancelot: (confused) Didn't you say it took you days for you to find the purple lily, Sire?

Arthur: The purple lily yes. But I came across those white lilies in the first two hours of my search.

Lancelot: ...

Arthur: And it took YOU three hours to find them. Honestly, Lancelot, I had more faith in your hability.

Lancelot: You already knew where they were.

Arthur: I did.

Lancelot: (catiously) Why did you ask for my help then, Sire?

Arthur: I wanted to speak with you privately.

Lancelot: About what, Sire?

Arthur: Well, It had come to my attention that you holded up some facts in your narration of the events regarding the bandit attack. Specifically some actions one of your new roommates did.

Lancelot: (thinking, nervous) Gwaine... the poor man. (says) Percival or Gwaine?

Arthur: You know who. Merlin told me Gwaine flirted with him and talked ill of me.

Lancelot: (sweating) Oh... that. 😅 (thinking) He's SO dead.

Arthur: He did not go into details though.

Lancelot: (thinking, in relief) Thank the gods!

Arthur: And that's why I'm asking you for said details.

Lancelot: (thinking) I talked too soon... (says) Pardon me, Sire?

Arthur: (with and icy calmness) What exactly did Gwaine tell Merlin?

Lancelot: I can't really remember, Sire.

Arthur: That's a lie. (pulls out a knife calmly) You have a great memory and you are more observant than anyone. That's how you could give my father a very detailed inform and how you discovered Merlin's magic so fast. So, I'll ask again. (plays with the knife in his hand) What did he say?

Lancelot: (trembling) S-sire 😰

Arthur: Why are you looking at me like that? This for the flowers. (passes Lancelot and starts cutting some leaves so the lilies are more visible) I don't want to ask again.

Lancelot: (swallows hard) I truly don't remember, Sire. I was a bit distracted. Gwen was there and... Well, you know, how love is.

Arthur: (gives an understanding smile) I do. You must love her a lot. I can't blame you.

Lancelot: (sighs in relief)

Arthur: (smiling sweetly) Now tell me the truth or I'll make sure you can't never marry her.

Lancelot: (thinking) Sorry, Merlin. I did try to save him. (says) Well... this is what I remember.

Time skip. Gawine and Percival walking around the Lower Town.

Gwaine: I spit it and I told him "Did you make it taste this bad on purpose?" and he said "No, that's how all Gaius' medicines taste". So I retorded "I rather have hangover that drink that shit again".

Percival: (laughs) You didn't even had a hangover. You were waiting for him.

Gwaine: (shrugs) I owned the guy an apology.

Percival: And since when do you apologise for anything?

Gwaine: (brings a hand to his chest dramatically) It offends me that you think of me that way. I'm a man that recognises his mistakes and knows how to apologize. I feel no shame in it.

Percival: I agree that you feel no shame for anything. (sighs) You finally have some genuine romantic feelings for someone. And of all people you could have chosen, it had to be the prince's lover.

Gwaine: (chuckles) I don't have "romantic feelings" for Merlin. He's fun to be with, is all.

Percival: Good. Because he is out of discussion. The prince will have you killed if you dare to try something.

Gwaine: Uuuh! Forbidden love 😏.

Percival: (warns) Gwaine.

Gwaine: I'm kidding! I'm not suicidal, I don't want to end up dead in an ally.

Percival: (stops to buy some vegetables)

Gwaine: Oh, I'll be over there (points somewhere). I need to... eh... take care of something.

Percival: Do not flirt with married women. 😒

Gwaine: That happened once! She wasn't wearing her ring and was not exactly rejecting me. How was I supposed to know she was married?

Percival: Nor some other prince's lover.

Gwaine: Again, once. (pats his back goodbye) I'll see you by the chickens. (leaves)

In some jewellery stand.

Seller: How can I help you?

Gwaine: Yeah... uhm... (pulls out a ring) I would like to sell a ring.

Meanwhile, in Merlin's chambers.

Merlin: (just lying in bed resting, not because he wanted to, but everyone insisted him to)

Lancelot: (enters suddendly) Merlin! Sorry for disturbing you, I know you are... erh... indisposed.

Merlin: Honestly Lancelot, it would surprise me if someone DIDN'T know I'm "indisposed".

Lancelot: But this is an emergency. Do you know where Gwaine is?

Merlin: He went with Percival to the Lower Town to buy some things, why?

Lancelot: Great. We have to go there. Now! (grabs Merlin wrist and drags him outside)

Merlin: Wha... wait, Lancelot! What's the emergency? What are we doing?

Lancelot: Saving a life!

Back with Gwaine in the jewellery stand.

Gwaine: Come on, man! I got it for more.

Seller: That's what I offer. Take it or leave it.

Gwaine: (accepts the money reluctantly) You Camelotians are such thieves.

Arthur: Says the one who wanted to steal my lover.

Gwaine: (startles and turns) Oh, the princess has arrived! (remembers his promise to Merlin and corrects himself) I mean, what brings his royal highness here?

Arthur: Why on earth are you in possession of a ring?

Gwaine: Men are allowed to have rings.

Arthur: It looks pretty feminine for you.

Gwaine: I have very... epecific taste.

Arthur: Sure, it had nothing to do with Lady Merelyn asking you for a ring if you wanted to be with her.

Gwaine: Look, I didn't know Lady Merelyn and Merlin were the same person at the time. As far as I knew, you had rejected her for him after what happened with the bandits and the only thing that could restore some of her honor was marrying someone.

Arthur: And you were so willing to do that sacrifice, weren't you? So eager to save a damisel in distress from a, how did you say?, a corrupt and debauchee prince.

Gwaine: How did you... It was Lancelot wasn't it! 😠 That telltale!

Arthur: No, he's good at keeping secrets. I'm just good at getting them out. I don't care what people say about me, let alone a nobody like you. What infuriates me is that you, did not only flirted with MY lover, but dare to tell him that I was playing with him, that I did not love him or took him seriously.

Gwaine: Again, as far as I knew, you had this lady as a misstress instead of as a wife, knowing that kind of relationship damages a woman's reputation. Anyone would think you were playing with her. If I knew she was actually a he I would have understood why you couldn't marry.

Arthur: And if it had been so, what? Are you always this honorable, defending the virtue of women unknown to you? No, you only did it because you wanted something with her. It wasn't out of the goodness of your heart. If you had any honorability or goodness in your heart at all, you wouldn't have filled Merlin with insecurities just to get your way!

Gwaine: (offended) I didn't fill Merlin with-

Arthur: (raising his voice) Tell me how telling someone their love does not really love them back, that they are just being played and will never have a serious comittement is not filling them with insecurities!

Gwaine: (actually feels bad) I... didn't think of it that way.

Arthur: Of course you didn't.

Gwaine: (impatient and annoyed) Look, I'm sorry, alright? I spoke out of turn, now I know you love Merlin genuinely and I won't question it or your relationship with him ever again. So go back to your big castle and do whatever is that you royals do. (makes a move to leave)

Arthur: (steps infront of him, not letting him pass) I believe we have something pending. (throws a glove to the ground) Pick it up.

Gwaine: ... What?

Arthur: You said you wanted to fight me, to see how skilled I was, so... (points the glove) pick it up.

Gwaine: (laughs) I won't pick up your fucking glove.

Arthur: By the knight code, you have to pick it up. So… Pick. It. Up.

Gwaine: No.

Arthur: Why not then?

Arthur: (smirks) Why? Scared?

Gwaine: Believe me, I have no shortage of desire.

Gwaine: One, because I promise Merlin I wouldn't fight you. And do want to keep being his friend, you see.

Arthur: (sarcastic smile) How sweet.

Gwaine: Two, I have no obligation. I'm no knight.

Arthur: Oh... you are right. There's no need of this. (punches Gwaine in the face)

Gwaine: (falls to the ground and brings a hand to his face in pain) You motherf- 😡

Arthur: I heard bar fights were more your style! (gestures him to stand up with his hands) Come on!

Gwaine: (stands up, angry) You asked for this.

Meanwhile, Percival by the chickens.

Percival: (being waiting for about half an hour, says to himself) Where is him? (hears people making commotion) What's happening there?

Little kid: (from afar) Mom, mom! They are fighting!

Mom: Stay away sweetie!

Percival: A fight? (an horrible thought comes to his mind and runs there, praying) Please let it not be him, please let it not be him. (gets there and spots Gwaine) It's him... 🤦‍♂️. (praying again) Please let the other not be a nobel, please let the other not be a noble. (recognises Arthur) That's the prince! 😨

Arthur and Gwaine: (beating the shit out of each other furiously, both bleeding from their recent injuries)

Percival: (very worried, runs to intervene)

Knight y: (who is patrolling there, stops him) What do you think you are doing?

Percival: I'm the one who should be asking! 😠 Isn't your work to prevent unrest from happening?

Knight y: Normally I would put an end to it, but this is the prince. We can't intervene. Is against the law.

Percival: What kind of law is that?! You are supposed to be protecting your prince!

Knight y: It was his wish to fight. I can't go against his wishes.

Percival: Well, I don't care. My friend is there. (makes a move to go to Gwaine's aid)

Knight y: (stops him again) I'm sorry, but we can't let you intervene.

Percival: We? (looks around and spots more patrolling knights) You have to be kidding me... What if my friend fatally injures your prince? Haven't you thought about that?

Knight y: We kill him before he does.

Percival: ... What? 😰

Knight y: It's the law.

Percival: And... if your prince fatally injures my friend? Will you stop him too?

Knight y: (shakes his head) He's the prince.

Percival: (thinking) Now I understand why Gwaine hates nobelty so much. (tries to pass the knights anyway)

Knights: (point Percival with their swords)

Knight y: Trust me it will be worst if you intervene. You won't only get your friend killed but yourself too.

Percival: (begs) Please, you can't let this happen! There must be a way to stop them!

Knight y: (thoughtful) Well, I think there is a way...

Knight x: (scolds) Alynor!

Percival: (desparate) How?

Knight y: The prince always listens to his manservant.

Percival: Merlin! Of course. Where is him?

Knight x: In the castle, resting. I heard he is... "indisposed".

Knights: (laugh)

Percival: (leaves running)

Knight x: (shouting) It's quite far! You won't get him in time! (sighs, to Knight y) 15 silver coins that he won't make it.

Knight y: Make it 20.

Some other part of the Lower Town.

Merlin: (still being dragged by Lancelot, sore and exhausted) Lancelot, please. We've been walking for hours. I'm tired.

Lancelot: (notices Merlin in pain and lets go of him, feeling bad) I'm sorry. I had a feeling that... (thinking) That Arthur would commit murder. (says) Forget it, I'm just being paranoid. Forgive me. I'll carry you back to the castle if you like.

Merlin: (chuckles softly) I would say no, but I really can't take one more step.

Percival: (crosses pat with them) Merlin! Thank the Gods! You have to come with me! (grabs Merlin's wrist)

Lancelot: (stops Percival) Wait, wait, wait! Where are you taking him?

Percival: The prince and Gwaine are fighting!

Merlin: WHAT?! 😨

Lancelot: (thinking) I hate being right... 😔

Percival: (starts dragging Merlin)

Merlin: (trips) Ow! (frees himself from Percival's hold, angry) Stop dragging me like some rag doll! 😡 I can walk on my own! (walks on his own, but he's too in pain to walk fast enough and he's limping) Those stupid idiots-Ow!

Percival: (Impatient) There's no time! (Picks Merlin up in his arms quickly and runs)

Merlin: AAAAAAH! 😱

Lancelot: (runs after them)

Meanwhile, with Arthur and Gwaine.

Arthur: (kicks Gwaine hard)

Gwaine: (falls on his back in the ground) Argh!

Arthur: (approaches to help him stand up, cause it's still dishonorable to fight a man when he is not in a position to defend himself)

Gwaine: (thinking Arthur was approaching to beat him on the ground, kicks in the air to protect himself, but ends up kicking Arthur in the crotch by accident)

Arthur: (bends over in pain, his voice a scale higher) Ow! You son of a bitch!

Gwaine: (laughs his ass off, while he stands up) This was not my intention, but oh gods! (keeps laughing) I hope you are not planning to have offspring soon.

Arthur: (still bending over, catching his breath) Shut up!

Gwaine: (joking) On the bright side, maybe now I do have a chance with Merlin.

Arthur: (straights up again, a murderous look on his face)

Gwaine: (thinking) Me and my big mouth...

Arthur: (lunges at Gwaine in full rage)

Meanwhile, Percival finally arrives with Merlin in arms and Lancelot by his side.

Percival: (puts Merlin on the ground gently)

Knight y: (To Knight x) Ha! He's here. Pay me.

Knight x: (reluctantly pays him)

Merlin: (serious) Where is him?

Knights: (point in the direction of the fight)

Merlin: (walks as fast as he can there)

Knights: (step away to let him pass)

Percival: Sure, you can't let a broad man stop the fight, but the defenseless scrawny manservant that can barely stand on his feet is more than capable.

Lancelot: (to the knights) We are his friends. Let us pass.

Knights: (look doubtfully)

Lancelot: He may need reinforces. The prince won't forgive you if he gets injured.

Knights: (step aside)

Lancelot: (to Percival) Hurry!

Lancelot and Percival: (run)

Back to the fight.

Arthur: (on top of Gwaine, choking him on the ground with his hands)

Gwaine: (trying to push him away, in barely a whisper) I yield! I yield! You proved your point. Pleas... (can't pronounce a word anymore, trashes harder, he can't breath)

Arthur: (thinking, eyes cold) 278.

Gwaine: (his movements weaken, face almost purple)

Merlin: (screams) Stop! You are going to kill him!

Arthur: (lifts his head and gets off Gwaine, like getting out of a trance) Merlin?

Gwaine: (Takes a deep breath and coughs, his hands on his neck)

Percival: Gwaine! (kneels to check him, worried)

Merlin: (furious) What is the meaning of this?!

Arthur and Gwaine: (pointing at the other, Arthur in a loud voice and Gwaine in a hoarse voice) He started!

Merlin: (yelling) I don't care who started it! You are ending it. Now! (to the people who is around in a circle) What are you looking at? GO!

People gathered around: (disperse)

Merlin: (turns to Gwaine and Arthur, dead serious) We are going to Gaius now and I don't want to hear a single word from you until we are there. Do I make myself clear?

Arthur: Merl-

Gwaine: But he-

Merlin: (raises his voice) I said, do I make myself clear? 😠

Arthur and Gwaine: (nod effusively)

Merlin: (sighs, tired, and turns to Percival) Percival, help Gwaine. (to the knights) You, help your prince. (turns to Lancelot) Lancelot, carry me on your back.

Arthur: Why is Lancelot carrying you on his back? 😠

Merlin: BECAUSE I'M INDISPOSED! 😡 And you are not exactly fit to carry me right now.

Arthur: (tries to stand up) Of course I-Ow! (winces in pain)

Merlin: That's what I thought.

Arthur: (opens his mouth to protest)

Merlin: Not another word! (to the others) What are you waiting for?!

Everyone present: (hurry to do what Merlin said)

Percival: (whispers to Lancelot) I take back what I said about him being defenseless, he is scary.

Lancelot: (whispers back, smiling) You'll learn soon enough Merlin is not what everyone sees.

...

Arthur after his fight with Gwaine:

This Arthur is so full of red flags I swear xD

Any idea of what is going to happen next?

Tagging @aceauthorcatqueen , @fallenxjas , @smileytrinity , @lucifertookmyshoe @an-entity-i-think , @thecornerofbelu , @griffonskies , @odinjm , @cinnabon-sweetroll-tiramisu , @thelady-mary , @bennedict , @nightninjaboy , @st8-of-grace , @starrieisdelusional , @error-username-not-available , @dogberryrowan , @jamieweasley13 , @tansyuduri , @tercais , @robynnemrys , @evadne01 , @serasvictoria02 , @hairdryerducks , @curiously-lazy , @harriettesthings , @andrealux16 , @wacko-weirdo , @greatdonutenemy , @yougottobekittenme , @anxiousosaurus , @kinkforwings , @someweirdassnamee , @impracticalantlers , @miyriu , @hobipabo , @whitemaskcd , @bogslob , @braziiis , @rubinaitoart , @thebigoblin , @toomanyfanficsbruh , @farmboyprince , @nonsensefunsense , @slightly-psycho-multifan , @jxmimac , @anarchelsworld , @beepbeep-yeah , @faithiikins , @the-moons-undying-light

[dwaekkicidal]

i feel like there isn’t enough smut with the dom writes on the subs body, rahhhh

i NEED it 😭🙏

👾

i dont see it as an “extreme” kink, but i def think its an acquired taste if ykwim? i used to loove this when i was dating my ex (sorta tmi but he was as vanilla as a person can come so idk why i was so into this back then?? LMAOO) but now its a hit or miss for me

but! i feel like meandom seungmin or chris would eat this up… OR (hear me out) mean dom yeonjun >.< imagine literally whoever you want since i dont name names, but yeonjun specifically was in mind when i wrote this

i think it starting off as a jealousy thing is so hot 😔

you’re at a party/outing and some random “freak” (his words, not mine) comes up to you and shoots their shot. that in itself is sooo disrespectful not only to you, but also your very obvious lover who literally JUST walked away <5 seconds ago to get you both a drink.

so when you guys get home later that day and he stands in the doorway of your shared room as you dry off from your shower, he’s a little surprised at this idea that came to mind

“Can I try something?” “Do you trust me?”

and when both are clear ‘yes’s and the basics of consent are out of the way, you’re a little confused when he walks over to you with a permanent marker in hand.

it doesnt take long for him to mark his favorite spots on you first

im talking a nice “MY property” & “네 재산” written on your hips and somewhere around both of your nipples (in english and korean just because the korean tickles a spot in his brain and also makes it a little less boring to write the ‘same thing’ in multiple spots)

he’d want that on your ass too, but he wanted to make sure he had space for “my little slut” in big letters there before anything else- he could always add the other part later <3

and dont forget the “my sloppy hole” somewhere on your inner thigh with a big arrow

a bunch of the possessive words are underlined- or double underlined if he’s really mad lmao

he’ll definitely add a lot of hearts here and there too; many paired with his favorite derogatory names (usually “bitch” and “slut” are the main ones but he might ‘spice’ it up and write “cum slut” or “my pretty bitch” in some spots if he’s really feeling it <3)

and he’s soooo proud when he’s done. big smile on his face and chest puffed out just enough for you to notice, but the main giveaway is the way his eyes trace over every last illustration with the same strokes he used to create them

it’s a little awkward/funny at first, but just know that he’s ENGRAVING the image in his head. he might be staring for a while, but he will never forget this moment and will think back to this every other time you guys are intimate- its a mental picture he can use to always remind himself that you are his (as he is yours) and that you are painfully aware of it

if you let him take a picture or teo, he’ll cum in his pants

[kathlare]

familiar echo

Lando Norris x Amelie Dayman

Summary: Lando, accompanied by his girlfriend Luisinha, attends the Hungarian Grand Prix, where he unexpectedly crosses paths with Julie, Amelie’s grandmother. Their conversation stirs old memories of his time with Amelie, creating an emotional undercurrent that Lando struggles to navigate.

Wordcount: 1.2 k

Warnings: none

full masterlist // request over here!

July 31st, 2022 - Mogyoród, Hungary

Lando walked through the paddock at the Hungarian Grand Prix, his hand firmly in Lusinha’s. The sun was beating down on them as the day unfolded, and the energy of the weekend was in full swing. It was always chaotic in the paddock, but today, Lando felt an unusual sense of calm. Maybe it was because he had Lusinha with him, or maybe it was because, for the first time in a while, he felt like he was moving forward with his life.

The hum of conversation, the clicking of cameras, and the buzz of engines in the background were familiar sounds, but Lando barely registered them. He squeezed Luisinha’s hand, flashing a polite smile at the fans calling his name. His mind was focused—on the race, on his performance, and on keeping everything else neatly tucked away where it couldn’t bother him.

But life had a funny way of messing with you when you least expected it.

As they rounded a corner near Red Bull’s hospitality area, his gaze landed on a familiar figure standing by the entrance—Julie. Amelie’s grandmother. She was chatting animatedly with Stella and Checo, her presence warm and vibrant, just as he remembered. Lando’s stomach tightened unexpectedly, a flicker of something—nostalgia?—brushing past the carefully constructed wall he’d built around his feelings.

Julie spotted him almost instantly. Her face lit up with a radiant smile, and she waved enthusiastically. There was no escape.

—Lando!— she called out, her voice carrying over the noise with ease.

He forced a smile, his grip unconsciously tightening around Luisinha’s hand. Julie approached them with the same warmth she’d always shown him, her eyes crinkling at the corners. There was something about her that always felt like home, and Lando hated that it still affected him.

—Julie,— he greeted, his voice steady, though his chest felt anything but. —It’s so good to see you.—

Julie didn’t hesitate—she pulled him into a quick, affectionate hug, catching him slightly off guard. When she pulled back, she looked him over, as if she was genuinely pleased to see him. —Oh, darling, it’s been too long. I’ve missed seeing you around.—

Lando chuckled softly, scratching the back of his neck. —Yeah, it’s been a while.—

Julie’s gaze shifted to Luisinha, her curiosity piqued. —And who’s this lovely young woman?—

—This is Luisinha— Lando said quickly, his hand resting lightly on Luisinha’s lower back. —My girlfriend.—

Luisinha flashed her charming smile, extending her hand. —It’s nice to meet you.—

Julie shook her hand warmly. —Oh, the pleasure is mine, dear. I’m Julie.— She glanced back at Lando, her smile softening with a touch of nostalgia. —I still remember when you’d show up at every race with that mischievous grin, causing all sorts of trouble with Amelie.—

Lando’s heart stuttered at the mention of her name. He forced another smile, pretending it didn’t faze him. —Yeah… those were different times.—

Julie’s eyes twinkled with a knowing glint. —I’m sure Amelie misses having you around. You two were quite the pair.—

Lando swallowed hard, his jaw tightening slightly. Doubt it, he thought bitterly, though he kept the words locked behind his teeth. —Life gets busy,— he replied casually.

Julie chuckled softly, clearly oblivious to the tension rippling under Lando’s calm facade. She reached out, patting his arm gently like she used to when he was younger—or at least when things were simpler.

—That it does, darling. But you know, some people leave footprints that time can’t wash away.— Her words lingered in the air, seemingly innocent but loaded with unspoken meaning.

Before Lando could come up with a reply, Julie clapped her hands together with the enthusiasm only she could pull off. —Why don’t you and Luisinha join me for lunch? I was just about to head over to the hospitality lounge. It’d be lovely to catch up properly.—

Lando hesitated for a split second. Every instinct told him to politely decline, to keep moving, to avoid the conversation that could spiral into memories he’d shoved deep down. But Luisinha, with her ever-graceful charm, nodded before he could say anything.

—We’d love to,— she said, her smile unwavering.

So that was that.

They followed Julie through the paddock, weaving past familiar faces, sponsors, and the occasional fan who called out Lando’s name. He responded with absent nods, his mind elsewhere. The hospitality lounge was quieter, tucked away from the chaos, offering a temporary reprieve from the blistering sun and the noise.

They settled into a cozy corner table, Julie chatting animatedly about her excitement for the race, her grandkids, and life in general. Lando half-listened, his mind flipping through memories like an old photo album—one he’d tried to throw away but kept finding tucked back on the shelf.

Speaking of photo albums, Julie suddenly reached into her bag, pulling out her phone with a triumphant grin.

—I was showing Stella some old photos earlier,— she said, scrolling with a speed that suggested she’d done this more times than she’d admit. —Oh, here they are!—

She turned the phone around, showing Luisinha a picture of Lando and Amelie from what felt like another lifetime. They were at some race weekend, both of them laughing, faces close, Lando’s arm draped over Amelie’s shoulders like it belonged there.

—Look at these two,— Julie said fondly. —Always causing mischief. They had such a spark, didn’t they? Like two little firecrackers.—

Luisinha’s smile faltered for the briefest moment, a flicker of something—discomfort? Insecurity?—crossing her face before she masked it with polite interest.

—You two looked like you had a lot of fun,— she commented, her tone light but laced with something sharper underneath.

Lando shifted in his seat, suddenly hyper-aware of everything—the way Luisinha’s hand wasn’t as relaxed on his thigh anymore, the way Julie kept scrolling, oblivious, showing more photos: Amelie in Lando’s hoodie, the two of them grinning with messy hair after some impromptu karting session, candid moments that felt too intimate even now.

—Yeah,— Lando mumbled, forcing a tight smile. —We were just kids, really.—

Julie finally put the phone down, sighing with nostalgia. —Ah, time flies. But it’s lovely to see you happy, Lando.— She glanced at Luisinha with a warm smile. —You’ve got a good one here, dear.—

—Thank you,— Luisinha replied smoothly, her fingers threading through Lando’s with a possessive squeeze.

Lando responded automatically, his thumb brushing over her knuckles, but his mind wasn’t there. It was stuck somewhere between past laughter, stolen glances, and a pair of green eyes that had once felt like home.

Julie, oblivious to the tension brewing, continued swiping through more photos—Lando and Amelie laughing over ice cream, playfully shoving each other at some karting event, and one that made Lando’s chest tighten more than he’d like to admit: Amelie resting her head on his shoulder, eyes closed, while he smiled softly at the camera.

—She always felt safe with you,— Julie murmured, her voice tinged with nostalgia. —I remember how she used to light up whenever she talked about you. Always had some story about something ridiculous you’d done to make her laugh.—

Lando cleared his throat, feeling a strange mix of pride and discomfort knotting in his chest. He glanced at Luisinha, who was now fiddling with the edge of her napkin, her smile strained.

—I’m just going to pop to the restroom,— she announced suddenly, standing up with a graceful ease that didn’t quite mask her unease.

Lando watched her go, exhaling softly as the tension at the table shifted. Julie didn’t miss a beat. She leaned in slightly, her expression soft but knowing.

—I always thought you’d be the one for her, you know,— she said quietly, her eyes locking with Lando’s. —You used to make her shine in a way no one else did. She was happiest when she was with you.—

Lando felt the words hit him harder than he’d expected. His mouth opened slightly, as if to respond, but nothing came out. What could he say to that? That he’d thought the same once? That he still wondered about it, even when he didn’t want to?

Before he could gather his thoughts, Stella’s voice cut through the moment, sharp and to the point.

—Grandma, stop bothering Lando,— she said, appearing beside the table with a firm but polite smile. —He’s got to get ready for the race.—

Julie chuckled softly, patting Lando’s hand as if her words hadn’t just stirred something deep inside him.

—Of course, of course. Don’t let this old woman distract you,— she said warmly.

Lando stood up, forcing a polite smile as he gathered himself.

—It was really nice seeing you, Julie,— he said, his voice steady even if his mind wasn’t.

Julie winked at him. —You too, darling. Don’t be a stranger.—

As he walked away, heading back toward the paddock, Lando couldn’t shake her words from his mind. They echoed louder than the roar of the engines, lingering like a shadow he couldn’t outrun.

[royalarchivist]

Tubbo: No don't- at least disable mines, 'cuz Chayanne nearly died the other day. He nearly- Chayanne nearly died the other day though, so like...

Foolish: Uhmm....

Tubbo: This is the most ethical one.

Fit: Tubbo, if you wanna disable mines, you are disrespecting the entire Hispanic community, don't you even fcking think of doing that, don't you even fcking think of doing that! How dare you disrespect the Hispanic community by disabling mines, what's wrong with you?!

Pac: [Losing it, clapping and dying of laughter]

Foolish: Yeah, I can't- I can't do that to Vegetta, that's one of his favorite things.

Richarlyson:

[hijinxinprogress]

12 year old tim realizing robin’s not coming back to gotham and deciding that it’s Batman’s fault so he has to ruin the little bit of sanity and peace of mind Bruce has managed (read: struggled) to keep in his grasp:

[delzinrowe]

THE OFFICE BUT MAKE IT JJK

[luck-of-the-drawings]

[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]

saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.

[86future]

[ 2ND CHILDREN / 5TH CHILDREN ]

— The truth is, Unit 02 simply isn’t compatible with the other EVAs. (E14)

— I never imagined this boy could synchronize with Unit 02 without replacing its core. Quite astonishing. (E24)

Death & Rebirth Pamphlet / Cruel Angel’s Thesis OP / EVA-02 wiki / DEATH (TRUE ²) / E16 / E24 / DEATH (TRUE ²) / E22 / 3.0: You Can (Not) Redo Cover / E09 / The End of Evangelion / E09 / E24 / NGE Manga / The End of Evangelion

[unexpectedbrickattack]

how do you feel about peppino x vigilante? i feel like it has potential but i've never seen anyone else ship it

It is SO funny that u ask this bc i was JUST thinking about them, and how if i made a human design for vigi then id never be normal (oops). theyd be the most uneventful old man couple and i love that for them. thank u for this ask and for reading my mind so take this thing i sketched out a couple days ago

[mabaris]

i will say it Sure Is Interesting that i remember people making a big fuss over whether they would know or could decide in-game whether their elves were from an alienage/dalish/etc and the devs were quick to reassure people that had been taken into consideration.

but there doesn’t seem to have been any equivalent for a dwarf rook

[beebfreeb]

favorite ghs artist also has a conlang ? my day is made ??

I even have multiple.

[bungeepuppet]

hisoillu break the fourth wall and watch the hxh musical scene where hisoka makes the zoldycks dance and illumi just comes in dancing with the grace of god

LMAO the musical is such a gift!! thank you for your request~ 💃💃💃

(if you're not familiar, PLEASE watch below, 4:00min in >;3c)

[subarashiihibi]

my thing about izaya is that he's so strange and weird and i love that so much. i didn't want to ramble too much in the notes of that poor person's post but i find the way he speaks and the words he chooses so interesting so let me ramble a little bit. this may or may not even be coherent so bear with me here im just going to speak my thoughts.

ok this got really fucking long and all over the 0place so im putting this under a read more sorry.

so i have volume 9 of the novel in both english and japanese. i only have two novels in japanese and that is this one and yuuyake wo. so i'm pretty crazy about this izaya speech analysis shit. anyways i was rereading thru the jp ver the other day just to compare it to the eng and i kinda realized that like.

a lot of people you can separate their speech in either formal and informal speech right? someone like shizuo speaks really informally and uses a lot of rough, dragged-out versions of words and stuff (しゃーねえ vs しょうがない) and then someone like shinra who speaks in a ton of yojijukugo and generally sounds like a nerd emoji gijinka.

izaya on the other hand rly... doesn't fit in either? i mean sure he sounds like another nerd emoji gijinka but it's kinda different. it's not so much the words he speaks but rather the intonation and his tone...

and he has his moments where he speaks pretty seriously and whatnot of course, but in general he just... doesn't sound very human when he speaks? i don't know if that's a conscious effort or not. is it his attempts at distancing himself from his own individual humanity? or is it just because he's a weird guy? i dunno. but it's interesting nonetheless.

one thing i will note though is that despite his somewhat inhuman speech patterns, it's also pretty...dramatic? to the extent where it's really exaggerated but also very cute and charming. (this part is important.)

i think a lot of what makes izaya's speech so weirdly inhuman is because he doesn't really use a lot of slang or similar lingo that people his age would typically use. i know mikado said in the novels that he doesn't really try to fit in with his age group's fashion sense either so it makes sense but still. he's like an old hag it's so funny. and it's because of that that when he says stuff like 'i don't get all hot and heavy over headless women' or whatever he said to celty it's really amusing to me because like... why is the strange man saying this?💀

another example i kinda giggled about on my twitter when i read it it's not even crazy and i sound corny and cheesy and stupid but theres this scene in vol 9 where izaya messages celty for business and hold on let me just put it as a quote.

he sounds so old saying 'video game' like 😭 idk it's just funny cause he barely even knows anything abt games like bro knows nothing im crying

in the jp hes like 「…ゲーム中なのかい？」 and then when celty tries to explain herself he says 「何を言ってるのか、良く解らないんだけど」 and im rly bad at tling parts of sentences and stuff but just know that the way he words it makes it sound like this gif to me

i love both versions i think the original jp makes him sound like hes so lost and confused (hence why pw gif cause lord that man always looks lost LMFAOOOO) and then eng tl just blunt ass "I don't know what you're talking about." makes him sound like full on hag 😭😭😭

OMFG WAIT I HAVE TO MENTION THIS FUCKING SCENE WITH SHINRA ITS SO FUNNY.

first i think it's funny the translation has izaya say fuck here cause he very rarely swears and i did read this one thing about how he only swears when his mask slips so to me this is like genuine bewilderment that he cant even hide LOL. second why is he so excited to hear about 'whatever sexual fetish' shinra has im crying he's so damn nosy . okay but this is not the funniest part let me add that now.

???

ehy the hell is izaya orihara talking about foot fetishes???😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 im crying bruh i was so flabbergasted when i read this i was like WHAT did he just say? he says it in the jp ver too which just makes it even funnier. this goes back to what i said earlier but i always get so amused when izaya has something to say about sex or whatever cause he's so fucking weird and unsettling why does he know that

(i mean i also get so hard i nearly pass out thinking about izaya tlaking about sex but thats probably just a thing with my heart condition and stuff)

oh also another scene i think is really cute and amusing and funny is back when shinra was first still trying to get izaya to form the bio club w him.

1. shinra is funny as fuck in this scene but also izaya's "Hmm. Can I punch you?" made me havbe a good laugh. in the jp he says 「んー。殴ってもいいのかな？」 which is pretty much the same thing just with the intonation of like 'hmmmmmmmmm should i hit u or not...' sorry like i said im just bad w explaining this stuff. but i felt the need to point it out not cause im one of those annoying ppl who praise the original jp ver and reject translations and localizations i just think it's important for izaya specifically cause i love him and i want to analyze his speech patterns as best as i can.

i was going thru the novel just now for other stuff i wanted to mention and i forgot abt this part but it's so funny.

'Let's not get hasty. Type calmly, please.' its not even funny or nothing i just find it so amusinf whenever he talks like that💀 i will say though the english translation kind of makes him sound more weird and inhuman than the original. that line in the original was basically just him telling her she needs to calm down enough to at least type properly LOL. idk if im just being nitpicky cause this is izaya tho so feel free to ignore that. fwiw i like the eng tl bc while it's a different intonation than the original japanese ver i think if he did speak english it would probably sound smth like that anyways.

this too made me laugh like ??? seriously he is really nosy when it comes to people's intimate affairs. in the jp ver he calls them an 'intimate couple' which just is like .. ok bro💀

does anyone else see my vision of izaya getting cucked by celty (does it count as cucking when celtys the one dating shinra) while he looks sad and pathetic and miserable that he never decided to shoot his shot w shinra back in the day

if i were commenting on the actual stuff going on in this scene rn this post would be a lot olonger and even more terribly all over the place so im just gonna focus on how i think it's funny izaya says 'easy, man...' this is like one of the only times his words are somewhat natural and sound like smth you would hear someone else say. in the jp ver it's 「おいおい…」 which is somewhat less out of left field in terms of coming from izaya but still it's pretty surprisingly normal. i have to wonder if in that moment he's too worried about shinra to care about keeping up appearances.

this is just random and me making fun of izaya as usual but why the hell does he weigh himself after his showers💀💀💀 it's cute and endearing and only adds to his strong gap moe but still... it's strange...

speaking of cute things this is from a volume i forget but he says this one phrase a couple of times and it is just both really cute and also kind of idk... saddening. one of the times i can remember he says it is when namie was making fun of him or something and he replies 'Don't tease me. I'm only human.' or something along those lines and it's like . hm. ok.

i think it's cute he says 'dont tease me' a few times cause eughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (trying to ward off severe brain damaged incoherent thoughts) but 'im only human' is like... are you really? even after you try so hard to escape your own humanity and individual self so much... im going to try and give my thoughts on it here but this is just based off my hc that izaya has bpd so yanno. im basing a lot oif this on my own experiences sorry. i do that a lot. (gestures over to all the posts i make abt fob/mychem fan izaya)

when it comes to just straight up acknowledging his humanity izaya has no problems with this because 'sure, i'm human. isn't that obvious?' is probably something along the lines of what he thinks. it's easy for him to just say that because it's just that. it's just words. it holds no real meaning and shows no true insight into how he actually perceives himself. but when it comes to actually having to come face to face with his own humanity and the fact that yes, he is only human, it's a lot more difficult because now it's out of his control. i wonder also if he has problems with perceiving his own self.

i say this a lot but i truly do believe izaya is so so so beautiful and i love him so much. also i just saw a funny post on twitter so i wanna say this here idk if yall know this but izayas actually a latina hes got chismosavirus❤ ok thats all i have to say sorry for rambling so much

[beaulesbian]

I was watching the first episode of the acolyte show, and when this name was said,

all i could think about was how this fantasy name sounds so similar to this one from dndhat movie

[triglycercule]

i'm so mttpilled and mttpolymaxxing constantly that i forget that there's people out there who really don't like mttpoly or mtt. and i'm just like,,,,,, wow. you are an enigma to me can i just flatten you and put you under a microscope

[tittyinfinity]

contemplating deleting my blog soon I might make a new blog but idk