#but that's a different topic. and much more taste oriented

[supercantaloupe]

☕️ any opera topic you’d like to talk about!!

i don't think a lot of the librettos in english language operas are very good. at least the ones i've seen or listened to. i mean they get the job done but where's the wit where's the word painting where's the poetry.

obviously there is some bias to my opinion here as to what sounds good as a lyric in english vs another language since english is my native language and with the exception of french (which i'm not really good enough at to understand it very well when it's sung) i literally don't Know any other language that operas get written/performed in. so like i can't judge whether the lyrical writing in some random italian or german or whatever opera is like poetically good or not except on a very basic phonetic level like rhymes and assonance stuff. (i do not like wagner's stabreim shtick tho. no thanks.) but when it comes to english language operas i feel like there is a lot to be desired in terms of the beauty of the lyrics on their own. maybe i'm just spoiled since i have such a strong background in broadway musicals which, whatever your opinion on those may be in general, do tend to have more memorable lyrics (at least the well-written ones do). sondheim and minchin are two of my favorite theater lyricists because they manage to write lyrics that are simultaneously emotional and witty, functional and poetic. (malloy manages the same too, usually without a rhyme scheme -- and while on one hand i think being good and consistent with a rhyme scheme is itself a tough skill to master, so too, on the other hand, is writing lyrics that are memorable without one.) also for pedantry's sake i don't consider gilbert & sullivan shows to be either totally opera or totally musical (they're a secret third thing) and they're obviously not going for the same level of high art that a lot of opera (seria) is, i think the lyric writing in g&s is some of the best in english language musical drama. and like again i know that there are just More (famous/popular) operas out there that are not in english and I Don't Speak Italian Or Whatever so it's already at an unfair advantage but like. idk. i don't think a lot of modern/recent english language operas have had particularly good lyrics either when they absolutely have the opportunity to do so. and i wonder why it seems to be less of a priority for new operatic works than new musical theater works

[ask meme]

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I break off an old friendship with someone who stayed by my side despite my mental and general life issues, after everyone else had left?

This friend from high school had been a great friend, kept me company when I was all alone, supported me through two bad breakups, we went to the same college and we were very close.

Until I started talking more openly about politics, being queer, mental health etc. She's the facebook liberal type, slightly left of center. She gave me the freedom to be more open with her by being cool with taboo topics, then turned sour when it extended beyond what she knew. Examples, she'd change subject if I talked about queer media when normally she's telling her friends how she had a sleepover with her "wife" and saw each other naked. She was surprised to learn that you're not supposed to out someone against their will. She believes cops are bad only in USA. We're not Americans.

She started being open with me too, she told me how she hated it when her classmates talked about their favorite music, how she hated any fandom stuff they talked about besides discussing fanfics with another fandom friend, how she makes excuses so she can go wherever she wants alone and not with friends. She told me she spies on my exes on facebook insta etc and tried to tell me what they've been up to and only stopped telling me about after many requests and explanations as to why that made me really uncomfortable.

A few months ago she and I had a fight, she exclaimed that my politics was too American (I'm just an average leftist like most of 30+ tumblr and my other friends), that my politics was too fandom oriented (she avoids fandom so much she has blocked activists for even hinting at being a fandomgoer, like discussion of racism in fandom is waste of time and silly to her, fan-anything can't be taken seriously), mocked me for having childish interests (just knowing pop culture in general) then we stopped talking.

After some months she texted that she really misses talking to me as I was her only "progressive friend" who understood her when she wanted to discuss feminism, movies, world politics etc. She said she needed me to be her gateway to pop culture knowledge as I knew so many cool new things. She begged me to be friends again, and since I missed hanging out with her a lot I started chatting again. But I told her that it was hard for me to forgive her and I'd leave for real if she hurts me again.

This time she let go of the normal daily stuff we used to talk about and only stuck to Topics of Debate. She asked me to teach her progressive thinking, educate her, but when I asked if she wanted to touch on lgbt+ topics or physical -mental health related topics outside of her comfort zone of basic sexual health, she danced around a lot instead of giving an answer. I snapped and asked yes or no, she said no.

I asked her if she understands that even if she didn't feel like those topics were her priority, I'd probably want to talk about them with her as a queer neurodivergent person and friend, would that be an issue? She kind of ignored it to say that basically her priority was just local political gossip, religion, and a little bit of solarpunk stuff, outdated at that. I was disappointed but let it go and we decided to talk later.

The other day she messaged me with her usual gossip about how her friends are being too excited about some music stuff and what book she thinks I should read (we have completely different taste). And I got a panic attack. Since then I've had multiple panic attacks at the thought of having to talk to her.

She has been one of my oldest friends, she supported me and took my side in every breakup I had and she forced me to go outside when I was severely depressed, she was practically family, but now I feel like I'm walking on eggshells. If I bring up any topic she dislikes she's going to turn away, if I come out to her as trans she'll joke and start to avoid me, she doesn't want to learn anything new even though she takes pride in being a great learner, if I talk about things that make me happy she'll ignore it. I don't know if she'll go and tell others how cringey my interests are. Maybe she'll go to my exes and tell them I used her as support and threw her away when she didn't meet the standard as that's been a line of thinking among my exes.

I'm also struggling with BPD and anxiety, so maybe I'm hating her now and will want her back later, it's my brain being a jerk? I think I'm overreacting and she won't do any of these, but I also feel so drained after we talk these days. I need friends who I can talk to about mundane things, friends who share memes with me and tell me what anime they're passionate about, what new recipe they liked, instead I feel like I'm just there to drag her down with my issues and politics and dumb jokes. But multiple people think I used and discarded them for not agreeing politically, I'd usually disagree but what if I am the problem and I expect too much?

So I'm asking, am I being a jerk if I cut her off?

What are these acronyms?

[grimalkint00th]

Please allow me to talk into the void for a brief moment. I’ve been wanting to touch on something about DD2 that has been bothering me a bit. My partner said it best, “Here's a question. Why do two side quests in Dragons Dogma 2 lead to you sleeping with two different women without the option of saying no? Additionally, why are there no male romance options that go that far?”

This grew to be one of my biggest gripes about the game so far. This obviously isn’t much of an issue in the grand scheme of the game but it definitely left a sour taste in my mouth. I want to briefly mention that I don’t play/seek out games solely based on whether or not they have romance aspects. However, I do enjoy when they do and I think it adds a great deal of depth to games if done properly. I am the type of person that mainly plays for the game’s story, lore, character creation, etc. I understand not everyone plays games this way but I enjoy creating little worlds to immerse myself in! So when something such as this is implemented into a game, it removes a large variety of players wants or expectations. It decides your character’s sexual orientation for you and for a lot of people (myself included), being given the freedom to develop that sort of thing on your own (if at all) is very important.

I’ve been seeing people making some pretty braindead arguments on this topic as well. One of them being, “Just don’t do those quests then.” Now, if you were to take more than 5 seconds to actually think about it, you would realize that 1) the player is given absolutely no warning that either of these scenes will take place beforehand. And 2) takes like this are severely missing the point of this conversation.

I guess all I’m really trying to say here is that I would’ve liked to see more variety. Give us some sexy time with male npcs too! Or give us an option to decline these advances at the VERY least.

[irontragedyreview]

One of those manga that I consider deserves an anime adaptation is Ao No Flag/Blue Flag. It’s short but above all I like how it touches on issues related to sexual orientation. Touma and Taichi’s story is tender but above it’s builds little by little, in the same way that the relationship between Taichi and Futaba is also beautiful and it doesn’t feel that she is the beard or  the middle of Taichi and Toma love.

Taichi learns and changes with Futaba and they push each other to improve, Taichi with Futaba learns to get out of his comfort zone, which had been one of the reasons why he and Touma had drifted apart, Taichi stops hanging out with Touma because he believes that they are in different social circles in high school, even when Touma tried to get closer but there is only so much he can do. His friendship with Futaba and subsequent love relationship doesn't feel bad because it’s built in a way that develops a relationship between two people who begin to enjoy each other's company, but above all who are there to support each other in overcoming their fears, even if in the end they end up with different people.

However, I feel that the end of the manga feels rushed in presenting you with certain events, both Touma and Taichi's relationship, and Masumi's revelation as bisexual. I would like to focus on Masumi more than any other character because honestly a cliché part of my heart was hoping that Futaba and her would end up together, especially because of the level of devotion that Masumi had towards her. Also in the end when  I saw her  married to a man, it left a bad taste in my mouth because she had settled for the easier life that represented hiding her sexuality. Of course, this doesn’t really happen, from the few words we see from Masumi's husband we can understand that he’s aware that Masumi likes both men and women and it doesn’t make him jealous or insecure because he trusts Masumi and her choice to be with him. In my blog there is a post (not mine) talking about this topic. At the beginning I also saw Masumi's marriage as her deciding to stay in the closet, especially because throughout the story the way she describes her feelings for Futaba and how she had tried to go out with boys but without feeling right. All this leads us to think that Masumi is a lesbian, which is why I would have liked one chapter before the ending with a broader development of her sexuality. Although, I want to say this I consider that knowing her bisexuality feels rushed but I don't feel that it’s wrong or queerbating because I can find myself in Masumi, I don't feel that it’s wrong to show that we’re still not completely clear about our sexuality while we’re teens, as a bisexual woman I remember going through a process to accept that I liked men and women. It was a big "I can't be a lesbian because I like guys" but it was also "I'm not straight because I like women too”, getting to a point where both thoughts coexisted and didn’t repel each other took me a while, especially because at the time I didn’t know the word bisexuality. I think that despite everything, Masumi is a good character to feel identified in the discovery of her sexuality because I can understand how her crush with Futaba canceled the possibility of perhaps feeling something romantic or even sexual towards others,  it makes sense that her feelings for Futaba occupy a space that perhaps didn’t allow her to fully explore other relationships to fully understand other aspects of her. That's why I think that once her crush with Futaba ended and had the opportunity to meet other people, she was able to discover herself.

[moonshinemusings]

General Alejandro Vargas headcanons (Pt.1)

Warnings: slight mentions of canon typical violence

A/N: The brainrot is strong my friends

• Loves trying new dishes, be it from a totally different culture or something he already knows about, but never had the chance to taste before (or only a handful of times)

• Loves fruits and vegetables, although most of his meals contain more meat than plants. He needs it for his physique so he doesn't mind too much though

• He can cook really well. He's learned it when was pretty young from his mother, and he's proud of his skills

• He's a family oriented man and there is nothing more important to him

• Used to the warm weather, so if he needs to go to places with colder temperatures for some reason, he suffers the whole time, trying to hide his shivering and numbness in his bones

• Isn't an early bird, nor a night owl; sometimes he has trouble sleeping, but he has a daily routine when it comes to waking up, so he sticks to that

• Prefers comfortable clothes, but never minds dressing up fancy either; suits, button downs, elegant shirts and trousers, you name it and he's probably worn it before

• His job doesn't give him much opportunities for that though, so he doesn't own a lot of those items, only a few in case he needs them (has to blend in somewhere, has an official meeting or gets some kind of medal, or God forbid a free day)

• His favourite season is autumn, not because the weather changes that much in Mexico (it does, just not where he usually is), but because of the holidays

• He's not religious, nor does he celebrate that many holidays, but he appreciates their beauty all the same and tries to understand everyone's beliefs and faith

• His favorite holidays are Christmas and Día de Muertos; family is the most important for him as mentioned before

• He's very understanding and has a comforting presence to most. All of his men look up to him, many as a father, idol or brother figure and he deeply appreciates that, because it means just as much for him as for them

• Likes to read occasionally, but doesn't often have the time. When he does, he reads classics or poetry

• He finds the ocean really fascinating, he could talk for hours about the topic (sea creatures, how the oceans move, how they affect the world etc.)

• Always says he can't sing, but Los Vaqueros had the chance to hear him when he was drunk a few times and honestly? He was good

• He can dance too, in his culture it's a thing you learn young and possibly cherish for the rest of your life

• Not a big drinker, but loves alcohol all the same; a tequila man (unsurprisingly), but he also likes red wine. Will drink anything though if the situation requires (as in the team is drinking or he has a toast with higher ups)

• Takes good care of his appearance and knows people turn their heads when they see him. He prides himself on looking good even at his age (although he knows he's not old) and being able to sweep people off their feet

• Comfortable with his affections. He hugs and kisses the cheeks of his brothers without shame and doesn't care if someone calls him gay or anything similar to it. If someone just utters a slur though, his fist is flying faster than the person has finished speaking

• Tries to keep up with everyone in Los Vaqueros; they are his family and he won't forget birthdays or asking about their relatives, hobbies or such

• Won't say it out loud because he doesn't want to hurt anyone else, but Rodolfo is the most important person in his life next to his blood related family. He'd rather get killed himself than watch Rudy suffer (the Hassan mission really messed him up, but Rudy reassured him through the whole procedure until they caught the guy)

• Doesn't mind accessories, but he doesn't really wear them because he doesn't want injuries or to lose them during his job. He has a liking for bracelets and watches specifically

• A romantic by heart, so if he ever has a date or a lady for a night, he will make it worth it. Fancy dinner, long walk under the moonlight, passionate night in bed (all in safe locations of course, he wouldn't risk a civilian, nor anyone else)

• He likes animals, be it the wildlife or pets, so if his life ever allowed him, he'd have a dog or maybe two

• Naturally his job comes with certain skills/abilities; he has a good awareness of people and situations, reading people is easy for him and thinking logically and strategically isn't something you lack in his line of work either

• Doesn't have a sweet tooth, he is used to spicy food not the sweet stuff. Although he loves chocolate, he doesn't often indulge himself

• Wouldn't call himself a coffee person, but likes to have a cup every day before work, or maybe when he feels a rough night setting in and needs a little boost

• Of course his job gifted him with sights in life no person should ever see, and he lost a lot of people in this fight, but he still has kindness in him that he isn't afraid to show

• Sometimes he lets his emotions get the better of him. He's an emotional man by nature, and his anger rises quickly when faced with situations he doesn't like. Rodolfo is always there to keep him down to earth though, and he never fails to appreciate his brother's help

• His favourite colors are blue and orange, but if you ask him about clothes he prefers dark tones (black, browns)

• He's always wanted a family of his own and his dream (to call it that foolishly) is to have a daughter, or maybe a big brother and daughter, so the little guy could protect her when he himself couldn't be there

• Loves nature, he always had; going on hikes, spending a day on a beach, scanning through forests, sitting on the skirts of the town, he loves it all

• He also likes flowers and in his younger years he wouldn't have minded learning the language of flowers. Unfortunately that never happened, but he doesn't feel like missing much

• Monday or Sunday, all the same to him. His work doesn't allow the usual week days and breaks, so he gets through every day almost in the same fashion. He likes to give his men the weekends off though, and always encourages them to ask for a leave if they feel sick or have something serious going on at home

• His favourite ice cream flavors are peach, lemon and caramel

• Can play the guitar, although he doesn't really have the time for things like that anymore

• He smells like whatever gear he has on at the moment and something woody probably. His natural scent is something manly and definitely earthy, but it can't really be named. Also, he only uses perfumes and stuff when he's not out in the field for work, or maybe he just sprays himself in the morning and lets it linger for however long it lasts

• He doesn't watch TV, rather spends his little free time doing more productive things like reading or cooking

[bebx]

Thank you for responding back! I am glad that my texts had you having a "good kind of whoa" moment :)) Of course, I still remember your amazing participation with diversely intriguing takes in spite of mainly focusing on only a couple of characters throughout your peak era. You have been my gateway to Tumblr and to confidently celebrating my love for a show, its characters and dynamics so profoundly. And I am ecstatic that my introduction to the world of fandom thriving here happened with you unknowingly guiding me through its orientation. Because after I had to venture around on my own, despite behind the shield of lurker, I realized how toxic and vainly spiteful some people can be, all due to differing opinions, framing then harassing one another, overall devolving the ambience of this site to downright Instagram toxicity when they all should be equally rejoicing about their common subject of enthusiasm getting a feast and that just made me long for re-experiencing your peaceful way of practicing free speech more. You radiated a very warm, uncomplicated aura with an assertive mind, despite the blood and gore and other unconventional topics of interest, compared to the absolute exhaustion one suffers by just skimming through their blogs or archive which are otherwise also saturated with thought provoking analysis. So, it has been very grey haha when I had to go exploring independently and not remain reliant about any ST news or fanarts, especially concerning Hawkins Lab Plotline on your blogs anymore since November 2023. Brightest side of this rollercoaster exposure is that I discovered many others with alike interests as well as views! Although I have to sacrifice my morals and principles while checking out the posts of some of them who tend to have a very strangely twisted and unavoidably problematic side. I feel wrecked by guilt while liking their posts which are relevant to what I predominantly seek them for but then I remember "hey just because I like Harry Potter doesn't mean I will have to stand by J.K Rowling". So yeah...haha that helps in upholding the neutrality, but this just makes me miss the simple times more. You have been such a great source of collecting the finest qualities of fan materials either through your own blogs or the posts you reblogged. Very well researched and organized. It was an authentic and easy way for me to keep a track of all the most artistic crafts related to the fandom through the exhibition on your archive. This is why I previously said in my preceding text that I appreciate people with a good taste of art, referring to you. But I am also thankful for the opportunity of liberation and self-dependence this unforeseen phase paved a way to, resulting in various discoveries which may have missed your radar. So yeah this is pretty much why I still remember, I hope I have sketched a bigger picture of my timeline with everything here and how you play the key role in it. It's always the little things with bigger meanings. But this is not the only reason, this was just for starters, I will shed light on other factors ahead.

Secondly...(yeah Ik I have written so much, I should just stop but I just have so much more and vital stuffs to say which I hope you would like to hear too.) I never felt your posts were all silly other than the intentionally hilarious ones such as incorrect quotes and other memes which could make the day of anyone who is familiar with the show. Underneath or beyond the humor, I felt they had a lot of heart and soul. Which is precisely why I was so anticipated for the marriage between the new *gasp inducing as well as fulfilling* updates and your insightful approach, full of creativity and writing skills with your characteristic capturing of classic human themes that know how to intricately weave so much of complimenting theories, observations and heartbreaking as well as heartwarming stories around it which I religiously consider as some of the best and underrated fanfics out there. I don't know how much you have been aware with TFS spoilers as I am not sure what did you exactly mean by not stumbling upon any real spoilers but so many things you stood for when there was hardly any substantial evidence, it's like you literally spoke them into acknowledged existence. I am not gonna risk spoiling most of it for you but I would just say that you made a post once, commenting on a theory highlighting the potential relation between Vecna and Mindflayer, the question of the true master of puppet and "how each time a gate opened, a boy was taken" and that has aged so well, that's all I can say. Rediscovering that post gave me chills. So you see, so many of your interpretations have hit the bull's eyes, as without giving something massive away, the prequel has humanized his character extensively. Like this was everything JCB could have asked for since S4 released and poor guy had been alone taking a mysteriously empathetic stand for him in public, which we got pleasantly mystified by as it also vindicated our resonating defense deep down, so we followed after. Subsequently I had this inside joke from that time (Nov 2023) that, "Damn, the makers humanized him more than any fanfic ever did, even collectively." So, in a way, this is everything we could have asked for, ourselves. You have this incredible penchant for seeing beyond what's purposely being misleadingly narrated, once it got backed up by a vaguely but still authoritative source, you get to the bottom of all the potential alternatives. Trusting your instinct based on Jamie's subtle and interesting support paid off! You realized something so unpopular once and presented compelling reasoning points which were the closest to what it is canonically revealed ultimately. You perfectly encapsulated the soul of something or someone which was too monstrous for the majority to be a subject of deep thinking let alone any redemption, which can be magnificently seen through every fanfic, short or lengthy, you wrote about him and Eleven and not merely through some "peek into mind" insights posts here and there. This play literally calls for a celebration. You have been nearly a lone wolf, I mean yeah there were plenty others here however with your unique perspective and standard nevertheless differentiating from other stans, this was almost your sole battle which in my view has been surprisingly validated by the stage play so much, beyond expectation actually. Like a perfect reward for loyalty and dedication. I still am halfway through what I am here to convey, the text limit is gonna reach soon so, will share the rest on another upcoming part.

I read everything and this is one of the kindest things anyone has said to me. thank you for your kindness and authenticity, it means so much to me and it may have awoken that part of my Henry hyperfixation, that’s been laid dormant for a while, a little too.

I wish words could describe how grateful I am for you, but I’ve definitely screenshot these and saved them so I can come back to look at them later when self-doubt starts making its presence known.

thank you for being so thoughtful, supportive and kind. it means more to me than words could ever describe.

also, yes, I’ve seen The First Shadow trailer and it’s absolutely beyond expectations. I have no doubt that the play is exceptional in every way.

[zestyaahbutler]

amulya has inspired me to write a fic about integra’s childhood but i have no clue how to go about it. do you think amulya is a large part of integra’s life despite dying so early on in integra’s childhood? do you think integra thinks about her often as a figure of influence? does integra remember anything vividly about her mother?

Waaaaah! Thank youuuu

That’s so amazing that I’ve inspired you like that. I have gotten obsessed with her mom so I’m glad I have infected others.

I do want to give you some writing advice. Nothing spec but it’ll keep you from putting yourself in a corner. If you don’t want to shackle yourself to a plot or want to jump around to different topics, start with short vignettes!

I have done this with Amulya. It allows you to jump around to whatever topics you want. If you ever want to continue one story for a couple of chapters, you can certainly do it. Especially if you’re uploading to a site like a03, I found the series feature very helpful. If you ever want to add a chapter, do it to that specific story but still keep it connected with the other pieces.

BTW Anon, I am unsure if you were curious about this; I don’t mind if people write about Amulya. As with fanart, I am all for it. All I ask is to tag me. If you have any specific questions about her personality/behavior, let me know!

If you wanted to keep things much more vague and inspired, I would start after she died. Depending on if you want to write about how others were affected by her death or just Integra would factor in on what age you would start at. If you want it centered around others and do small stories, 4-5 is great. If you want it more centered around her and it be more personal, 8-13 is great. It would be so interesting if you also did one in her teenage years since she had neither her mother or Arthur.

If you want any inspiration, I would suggest checking out my story ‘Those That Grow In Their Place.’ This one is a small story I did about Integra and Walter gardening together.

Amulya's Role and Influence In Integra's Life

Answer under the ✂️

I do think Amulya is still a large part of Integra’s life. Integra would know her mother was sick and that is about it. Amulya’s death was a little more extreme of course but it was nothing for a child to know. She died when Integra was 3. Amulya does influence her personality. They are both very stubborn people. Very argumentative. Arthur is equally determined but much more in line with his goals. Much more business oriented. Amulya and Integra are more likely to look out for others as part of their goal.

Integra and Amulya smile in similar ways. They both have a catty, mischievous look to them. Integra is very much a mix of her parents but takes after Arthur more as she grows up. Any of Integra’s soft caring looks are likely similar to her mothers. Her and her daughter share some serious eye bags. Amulya’s eyes have much darker circles to them.

In another post where I discussed some WalterxAmulya junk, I mentioned that her and Integra have the same knock. It starts out soft, if the other party doesn’t respond then it’ll become a little louder. Walter will sometimes expect her mother to come walking in when it is just little teggy.

Integra did still have Saris, and I’m sure even was able to wear some of her mother’s. Arthur still celebrated Hindu Holidays despite them both being Protestant. Integra was still fed Indian food. Walter was taught personally, so Integra would know Amulya’s cooking from him.

Her fashion does influence Integra. Her and her daughter share the same madness odd taste in hats.

She still sees her mother in pictures, a few paintings. I’ve debated on videos. Arthur is a rich son of a bitch so I wouldn’t doubt he would invest in something to film Integra. Most cameras around the late 70s to early 80s were huge and heavy though. It would be a nice thought that Integra would have a few videos of her mother. Maybe I’ll cheese it and say Arthur got early access to some nice portable at home cameras. Amulya also had left voicemails on phones in the house so Integra would be able to hear her mother’s voice. It would be simple messages. Arthur would have saved a few where she sounded especially cute and expressed her love for him. She had an Indian accent which would be interesting for Integra to hear. If there were videos of her, there is no doubt one Amulya made for Integra for whenever she is older. Her mother also left her a few letters. One for a few off hand topics on growing up and one goodbye note. She always loved Integra deeply and made sure to write how much she really meant to her even if she didn’t feel strong enough to be there.

Integra would definitely think about her. She asked her father plenty of questions about her. Arthur would answer most unless she hit a nerve in which he would redirect her to Arthur or Milana(Amulya’s previous psychologist who really just works for Hellsing). Arthur never took Amulya’s death well and was grieving over it till his death. There were definitely some days where he came off as cold or distant to some of her questions. His drinking didn’t help either. Amulya’s death definitely affected both Arthur and Integra’s life in this aspect. Integra would never understand her father’s mood on certain days or why he kept drinking when it was how he got sick.

She got varying opinions from her father, Walter, and others. Her father never spoke badly of Amulya. Often talked about the love they had and how happy she was to have Integra. Arthur tells their first meeting and bringing her back to England like Amulya was a princess and he swept her off her feet.

Integra wonders about her mother. Any child who loses a parent at a young age will do this. Some days are sad and wishing they could be there. Even she ended up crying some days and asking her father or Walter why she couldn’t be there. These times were rare but becoming emotional does happen. If she ever got into an argument with her dad, she may wish she had her mother around to hug. It isn't the same as losing a parent later on in life. There is still some emptiness but in the way she never got to experience her mother's presence more.

When growing into a young woman, she’d look at pictures of her mother to see how she compares. She may have even tried replicating her mother’s makeup from pictures. She would wear her perfume on special occasions, likely when she goes to an important business meeting.

Walter or Milana are likely the best two people Integra can go to question about her mothers philosophies. Integra’s questions would range from how she felt about her dad, how Amulya felt about her, if her mother also fought vampires, or what her mother would think of her at a certain time in her life.

Her view of her mother is very rose tinted. She does feel some bitterness for her not being there but it isn’t much. When she does learn about how her mother dies when she is much older, she would have mixed feelings on the matter. It isn’t something she would expect and she’d definitely have to process it.

Integra has small bits and pieces of her mother scattered in her memory. She does remember her mother with short hair. A really clear view of her mother smiling at her. Perhaps how her mother’s slim fingers felt when she grasped them or a short taste of her mother’s Samosas.

I appreciate you asking! This was wonderful to answer as I was able to touch on some stuff I have previously not mentioned. It’s great when people come in and do this because I will not do this on my own unless kicked into gear by copious amounts of inspiration.

I wish you best of luck on your story. I really look forward to seeing it if you do. I love everyone’s interpretations of stuff. It is always refreshing and exciting.

I also wanna share a song that reminds me of Amulya:

[thebarontheabyss]

I am ashamed to say my taste hasn't changed since I was a teenager. I would have loved this if it was a paperback. But what I love about Interactive fiction is that I can control the narrative after sobbing for hours over stupid MCs in books who pissed me off so I actually really like this.

I simply wanted to say I hope you take care of yourself during the writing process. I noticed you are quite fast with updates and fixing errors and that's great but please don't overwork yourself. Such great books get canceled because talented people take on too much. Remember you are only human (which made me giggle writing because of the premise of this game)

I have questions:

1. Will you in future be making mood boards or maybe just more detailed descriptions of the ROs such as likes/dislikes or personality traits/esthetics?

2. You mentioned there will be sexual and romantic/poly options aswell. Is MCs sexual orientation gonna be an issue or talk point in any of the routes? I'm following a IF where if you are a same gender MC the topic comes up if it's new to a certain RO. which I think is cool if it's done well without all the hate and pitchforks from simple minded people.

3. As for asks is there anything you are uncomfortable answering? I know alot of pages do NSFW asks or prohibit them or do certain scenario asks (the what if/ reactions from RO asks)

I hope none of my questions are too much if it is just feel free to skip them please I don't want you to spoil too much if you would rather not.

My perspective on the romance options are that you are spoiling us. In the end it comes down to romancing:

1. Death which is like wtf I doubt it's in his usual routine to date.

2. Doing a devilish fboy route who you will try to fix and teach emotions. God knows we've all tried that in high school.

Or

My personal hell 3. A forbidden angsty make you want to tell your MC to get it tf together route aka try not to fall for someone with a pulse when you lack one.

I'm very invested in this. Seriously I adore fantasy games usually ones with a darker take but I love slice of life anime so this is the best of both worlds for me.

Thank you for sharing it with us.

First of all - THANK YOU for taking the time with this detailed response. I can't say how much i appreciate it! Before diving into your points I'll note on my quick progress with the story so far, I really get it! This story came to me after 6 years of being in writer's block, so it kind of feels like a dam has broken and this is the result lol. But I'm definitely taking care of myself - just that instead of playing Baldur's Gate 3 all day this is what I'm doing lol. Now to some answers! 1. I'll definitely will come up with a RO board in the near future, i was also wondering if I should use AI art for it but I am kind of new to this scene and really don't want the pitchforks my way so I haven't decided yet 2. As of now, instead of picking an actual orientation the player can just pick the genders of the romance options and then decide to themselves how they feel about them (with 3 romance options and 1 for friendship) i think that's the best way to include everyone. Also, want to add that each romance option will have 2-3 endings so romance or friendship paths can go in different ways. 3. Fine with answering everything! This story is currently not going to have explicit sexual content (but also not fade-to-black. I guess when I cross the bridge I'll decide) I will say that I'm going to update here often BUT don't want the tumblering to take over the actual writing process (as I see some of the creators here do lol) Happy to hear you are excited about the romances like i do! I also have thought of adding more, maybe even with the staff (although that's a minefield to navigate when you consider the power imbalances) I guess it will depend on the feedback. Again, thank you for this response. It made me smile like an idiot!

[shytastemakerthing]

Hello, If I may, I'd can i have a romantic/platonic (I leave it up to you) match from Twisted Wonderland please? She/her. Sexuality: heterosexual   Zodiac: Aries Slytherpuff Mostly with strangers I'm quite cold, I try to keep my emotions in check and accidentally ignore people (not because I'm evil selfish, it just happens somehow), so you don't think I'm shy, but cold (although sometimes I'm shy, but that's not a very appropriate word). But I really like to spend time with my family and have fun. Cooking together, going to the forest together, going to the river together, playing games together (sports, computer or board games, I love it all). I like to spend time with people I value and will look for a reason to do so whenever possible. I am also ready to listen to people's long stories about topics that may not interest me much, but if they interest the person I love, I will ask questions and be interested. However, I have a hard time with trust, and I don't mean that I'm jealous, I mean that sometimes it's hard for me to take off the mask of a "serious person". In public, I don't like to attract attention, but I want to be perceived as a really responsible and serious person, and of course, respected. I'm also quite honest and I can't stand hypocrisy. I don't like rude, cruel people. I'm very picky about the genres I like to read or watch, and very often I give up before I've read or watched something, just because I'm fascinated by another topic. My favourite genres are detective, fantasy, sci-fi, historical, and adventure. I love academic and vintage aesthetics. As for music, I can really listen to different genres, I don't have any favourite artists or songs, it all depends on my mood. But mostly I listen to classical muzyka, jazz, electro-swing and ambient in the background. I adore everything connected with nature, hiking in the forest, gardening, caring for plants at home and it doesn't matter if I get muddy. I like to sit at home and knit, paint, carve wood, or do absolutely any household task, as well as active recreation, if there is a company, in summer hiking in the mountains, in the forest, tennis, in winter sledding from the foot of the mountain, ice skating, snow modelling. To be honest, I often burn out on different things, hobbies, genres, tastes in food, so my tastes and interests are endlessly changing each other, and if a change or the ability to switch to something else is not possible for a long time due to deadlines or overload, burnout increases. I am also a rather uncertain and insecure person, so it is difficult to understand what I really want. Sometimes people say that I can be rude and harsh with them, but I don't mean it that way. I also don't hold a grudge against people for a long time and I move on easily after a quarrel. I don't like conflicts and try to avoid them, and I'm not going to get into a fight with anyone. I don't like criticism, but I don't mind losing or failing. Thank you!

A/N: Hello and thank you for your request! I went with a romantic match-up for this one, perhaps I will come back around after the rest are finished and to a platonic as well! I hope that you like this and enjoy!

Tw: None

I match you with........

Trey Clover

Trey is a very family oriented man, having spent much of his time in his family's bakery while growing up. Hearing that you very much love spending time with your own family just holds a very special place within his heart. Sadly, it's something that is not often seen, so to see you so close with your family makes him smile.

While he does more baking than he does cooking, Trey would love to be able to cook with you at times. Just a little direction as to what to do and he is as good as gold. I can also see him teaching you how to bake certain things as well. Trying out each other's recipes? Absolutely.

Trey sees that you are someone who does not like to attract the attention of others, and he is rather understanding of that fact about you. Despite being a vice housewarden, Trey spends much of his time more in the background of things, observing, and making sure everything runs smoothly. He will always make sure that you are okay if he does see you on your own, he just doesn't want you to struggle alone.

He understands how you tend to change tastes in just about everything from time to time. Trey is someone who is used to having to do some last minute changes and he will put that into good use when he is with you. Not a fan of a dessert you once liked and want to try something new? Why not come with him to the Heartslabyul kitchens, let him know what does sound good, and he will see if he can make you something that you do like. He is a very patient man, don't worry.

Overall, Trey loves you no matter what it is that you like, no matter how many times the things that you like change, or when you just want to be in the background on your own. He is someone who respects these things about you and everything else he may come to know while being your partner. With Trey, there is very little to worry about.

[ithinkabouttzu]

Hiii it's the webtoon girl!! Here with some recommendations!!

If you're into a soft fluffy romance then I suggest:

1.)Maybe meant to be ( summary - Jia Han is a freelancer who is tired of her parents nagging her to get married and move out, She then runs into a childhood friend, Mincheol Jin, who is in a similar situation as her so she proposes to marry him to solve their problems. Then shenanigans ensue)

2.)My Giant Nerd Boyfriend (This is my favourite) (Summary- It's a oneshot story featuring a couple with a height difference, each chapter is stand-alone ish )

3.)Not so shojo love story (Summary - Romance super fan Rei Chan is ready for her first boyfriend and she knows who it will be, Hansum, the most popular boy in class. But her plans get derailed when the most popular girl in class declares herself a rival for..... Rei's heart?!!!)

If you like drama, political and regal stuff I suggest,

1.)The Remarried Empress (This isn't my favourite but it was a very enjoyable read, and it's a very popular webtoon) (Summary - Navier is a perfect Empress of the Eastern Empire and her life is perfect until one day her Husband brings home his mistress and demands a divorce. In a shocking twist, Navier remarries another Emperor and retains her title. But how did everything unfold?)

2.)Twilight poem ( Soru is a princess born form illegitimacy and is able to see ghosts even though she is completely blind. Spru gets married to a general because they need each other, she needs his protection and he needs her special magic powers. However, Soru is more special than anyone initially thought) (TW: Violence)

If you want you can also read the Webtoons that Hybe makes for their groups like The star seekers, Crimson Heart, 7Fates:Chakho, Dark Moon: Blood Alter, Dark Moon: Grey City, etc (Their summaries are too long so just check em out on Webtoon lol)

If you are into horror or crime stories I recommend:

1.) My deepest secret (This gets a little dark towards the end so if you think it may trigger you don't read it) (Summary- Emma has the most handsome, loving boyfriend, Elios. But is Elios really that perfect? What's his secret?) ( TW: Yandere themes, abuse, Violence)

2.) The Guy Upstairs ( I don't know if it gets dark in the future since it's fairly new but read with caution as it's more crime oriented) (Summary - Rozy finds her upstairs neighbour a little too... odd... ) (TW: Potential psychopath, Violence)

And if you want a more unique story and don't mind gratuitous Violence I recommend, (Also warning, it is a dark story and has certain morally bankrupt themes so give it a skip if you don't like stuff like this since I am not sure about your tastes I am recommending everything that I found interesting)

Get Schooled ( Summary - Hwajin Na's teaching techniques are pretty violent for someone who works in the ministry of education . That being said, when normal punishments don't work on even the worst of bullies, there is no better man for the job. Sometimes you can't get a good education until those bullies are taught a lesson) (TW: Alot of violence, abuse, graphic descriptions of potentially triggering topics such as depression and suicide)

Yess thank you so much for the recs!!!!

Okay I just got the app and i’m gonna read My Giant Nerd Boyfriend!! I’ll let you know how it goes 🤭💗💗

[faceglitchsworld]

I’m curious as to what other genres/artists you want OnlyOneOf to take inspiration from 👁 feel free to make the BIGGEST wall of text possible

Thank you for this question :D

Firts of all, I'm so happy that you decided to start to listen to IAMX. Chris Corner is the main reason why I started to listen to electronic music in general and he was the first artist that broke some "rules" for me such as talking about heavy topics like gender expression, depression or society in general in a song. I truly recommend to check his discography :D

Ok, back to the question now XD

I'll try to give the best list possible and make the biggest wall of text ;)

Mind you that this entirely based on my taste and what I've listened trough the years so, maybe we can differ on some visions or choices :D

Ok, first and foremost I want to mention an artist that unfortunately passed away but helped so much in the Hyperpop scene, who's SOPHIE. Her and Arca (btw thank you for mentioning her on the tags of my reblog, it's always a pleasure finding some fans here <3) are the main reason why we have the hyperpop scene now.

She was capable to switch to a melodic song to an harsh, heavy one.

The great examples I can give to you is my favourite song from her, which is also one of my comfort songs, It's ok to cry and Faceshopping, one of the most harsh and known songs made by her.

Another artist that comes to my mind is surely Kilo Kish. I've discovered her through my favourite band of all time, Gorillaz, and I love her since then. Her recent album, American Gurl, has some sound directions that can fit perfectly with OOO's sounds. I'll give here three songs as examples.

Speaking of Gorillaz, their album Humanz has a couple of songs that, in my opinion, can be a great inspiration to them. The first one is She's My Collar. This song had for a long time the title of Best Sexy Song Ever Made to me. Then libidO, skinz and dOra maar brainrotted my mind but that is another story XD.

Back to the song, I think that, for me, OOO should make the new sexy concept based on this song. It's perfect for them. They can even just made a cover, I would be happy regardless.

The other song that can be perfect for them is Out Of Body. And if you noticed, Kilo Kish is here XD

The other artist that I want to mention is Troye Sivan. I know, maybe the choice is pretty obvious but, for me, it's another perfect inspiration for them. Especially his latest album, Bloom. Idk, I think the entire undergrOun idOl serie's vibe (especially the MVs' atmosphere) can be pretty inspired by that. I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if one day they'll say that they've listened to this album for me XD

Now, moving to a more industrial and heavy sound, Hatari and Nine Inch Nails are surely great inspirations. I'll just add here another industrial band that might be a good inspiration to OOO of they want to go trough an heavy, harsh sound and even more rock oriented. The band is Rammstein. I'll give here the most well known songs as example of their sound.

These are the artists that, in my opinion can influence and inspire OOO's sound into something more experimental and harsh (such as hyperpop, industrial etc.). Again I've decided to stick mostly on the electronic side since I've noticed that their discography is pretty much based on that kind of sound and maybe they feel more comfortable by doing this kind of music. Hope I'm explained myself perfectly and I apologize in advance if I made some typos

[waffelteufel]

Stopped reading books after highschool and only picked it up very recently again and it is such a good feeling! Very proud of the amount of books I've read since last fall, despite being pretty busy. Gonna put some silly thots and reviews under the cut, just cuz I wanna:

Almost all these books have some queer and/or liberal themes in common, which is kinda the only thing I am interested in, at least at the current moment. The Goblin Emperor - Katherine Addison (MY RATING: ★★★★★) A half-goblin protagonist who has been disowned by his father emperor, trying to survive court after being crowned because said father has been assassinated. Despite some very depressive tones, it actually turns into an A+ Comfort Book about hope and finding new connections. Practically no action in the book, just people being people. No explicit queer plot except one character, but the themes are very liberal in my opinion. Witness for the Dead - Katherine Addison (MY RATING: ★★★★★) Spin off from Goblin Emperor with a character from the first book. The vibes are very different, but still retain that comfort feel. A pretty melancholic journey with hopeful tones. The book is pretty short and it is very easy to get through it. The main character here is a gay man this time! Thara my blorbissimo... The Grief of Stones - Katherine Addison (MY RATING: ★★★★☆) Sequel to Witness of the Dead. If you liked the previous one, you will like this one too. I enjoy Thara as a main character SO MUCH and relate pretty hard to him. Despite there being no love story in these two books, I am getting some Vibes (tm) from a particular character though, and I really wanna see where that will go in the next book. I love the Goblin Emperor universe So Much. Only critique I have, is that the author makes the more action-oriented narration very brief (too brief for my taste) and I always feel surprised at how quickly it's over, which makes it feel a bit dull and rushed. I'm giving it 4 stars, but actually 4.7 would be more accurate. How To Lose the Time War - Amal El-Mohtar, Max Gladstone (MY RATING: ★★★★★) Really funky and surreal sci fi fantasy with time travelling shenanigans. Pretty short but profound love story between two women that mostly communicate through letters. Enemis to Lovers, and really well done too. The premise is very unique in my opinion, and because of the style it is written, everything feels pretty fast paced and fun.

The Traitor Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson (MY RATING: ★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★)

I am fucking insane about this book, my god. It rearranged my brain and shattered my heart. A very low fantasy setting with a poc lesbian protagonist trying to dismantle a colonial fascist empire. It is raw and deals with very awful and heavy topics like eugenics, homophobia, brainwashing, colonial atrocities, etc. and is not scared to be blunt about it. The story and characters feel very clever and intelligent, and it is thrilling to see it all develop. Do not read this if you want a wholesome happy story, but do read it if you want something that will stick with you forever and make you think critically about the western powers of our world, whilst exploring that through a fictional lens.

The Monster Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson (MY RATING: ★★★★★)

Sequel to Traitor. The style of writing and the pacing changed a little bit, because of personal reasons of the author. It takes a little bit to get into it again, but the book starts on a similar note as the last one ended, which I found awesome. Certain characters from the first book are given more meaning through this one, and some surprising twists occur. Characters are given more depth, I ended up having a new fav that I did not expect to enioy as much. Towards the end a few things happen that felt "too convenient". It changes the vibe of the story a little bit in my opinion, and I am still unsure on how to feel about it. I might change my opinion for good or worse once I am done with the next book. Still a really fucking good read though, Baru is such a character.

Crier's War - Nina Varela (MY RATING: ★★★☆☆)

Fantasy automatons rule the world as first class citizens. Humans want to start an uprising. Human girl tries to get close to a very important automaton girl as a handmaiden, but ends up developing feelings for her. The premise is very cool and I like the tropey feel, but the politics in this books or unfortunately very superficial and childish to me. The actual love story feels very indulgent sapphic, which I did enjoy, but the bits of politics scattered into it feel like a distraction. While reading I often felt like the author must not have a good grip on what politics actually are in the real world, and I often wished that it was just hinted at between the lines, instead of getting those childish plot threads. I also did not enjoy the flashbacks as they felt very on the nose, and just like with the politics it would have been much better if there was more of a "show, don't tell" approach.

Sweet Bean Paste - Durian Sukegawa (MY RATING: ★★★☆☆)

Not a queer book, but it was the first one I read since forever, so I have a soft spot for it. Sweet Bean Paste is a very light read, very short. A cute comfort book playing in Japan about a guy with a criminal record finding his new passion of making doriyaki, after befriending an old disabled lady. No romance in the book, no action, just good vibes. The book is perfect to pass the time. Jasmine Throne - Tasha Suri (MY RATING: ★★☆☆☆)

Ok so the setting is amazing, but I absolutely couldn't force myself to finish the book, which in my opinion is the worst thing that could happen. It's a south asian fantasy setting (dope!) with two sapphic leads (hell yeah!) with the handmaiden trope, some nature-focused fantasy and really good visual descriptions. The setting and idea of the world itself is marvellous, but I just couldn't get myself to care for the characters. At all. And that breaks my heart. I kept losing focus when reading, because there were simply so many shallow POVs (the chapters are written in different POVs) of people I simply didn't care about. The dialogues are so and so, and the villain feels very cliché too. There are a few twists in the book, which I could tell from miles away, and that just took away all the excitement I had. That whole different POV thing was def the nail in the coffin for me though. There is literally a chapter that is a few pages long from the POV of a completely random soldier that dies at the end of said chapter, which is supposed to show you that a certain location has been attacked... We don't actually need that information straight up like that. The characters could simply see a location on fire from far away and simply deduct that someone has been ambushed. Spoon-feeding plot just feels very eh to me, and I'd rather read between the lines to find out about such things. The relationship between the two WLW characters felt promising, although it didn't work on me as well as I hoped. Maybe it's just Not My Kinda Book though, others will probably enjoy it much more.

To Be Taught, If Fortunate - Becky Chambers (MY RATING: ★★★★★) A short novella about four astronauts who have been sent into space to study a couple of planets. The books is very relaxing and good vibes, the characters all have a very close relationship with each other and there are vague hints towards them being poly and being romantically and/or sexually involved with each other. One of the character is also heavily hinted towards being trans. What I liked about the book a lot was the perfect combination of just showing people and their emotional states and lovely dynamics, and combining that with (actually really damn interesting) scientific lore drops from their journeys. The excitement the character feel during breakthroughs felt very infectious and I smiled a lot while reading. Again, the novella is REALLY short, so I am actually amazed at how much the author managed to fit into it without making it feel crammed. Overall a very lovely experience.

[flexible-student-accommodation]

How to Find Private Student Accommodation in Leeds with ease?

Finding Your Perfect Student Accommodation in Leeds: A Comprehensive Article

The city of Leeds being a brisk university town, attracts countless students from all parts of the world every year. The thrill of the commencement of your academic life is there, but the hunt for the right accommodation is tedious.

In this overview, we will take you through the process of the search for private student accommodation in Leeds and ensure you gain the sufficient information required to choose your perfect home away from home.

Understanding the Leeds Student Housing Landscape

There is a wide variety of quality student accommodation across Leeds.

The records tell us:

Leeds is the temporary residence of over 60,000 students a year.

Close to 70% of the students are staying in private accommodation.

The weekly average cost of a student apartment in Leeds is £135.

Having these numbers in mind, let's move on to the next topic of options and how to get your desired living area.

1. Start Your Search Early

Timing is the basic thing that is very important in finding a student house. The majority of the properties in the must-have areas are quickly gone. Key dates to remember:

January-March: Peak booking season for the following academic year

April-June: Limited options still available

July-September: Last-minute vacancies, but choices may be restricted

Pro tip: Preferably start your search about 6-8 months ahead of your desired move-in date. This will give you access to the maximum number of choices.

2. Determine Your Budget

Before jumping into your expenditure plan, decide on how much you are willing to spend. Think about these:

Rent (the price ranges from £135-£200 per week)

Utilities (the average cost is about £50 per month)

Internet (costs approximately £25 per month)

Food and groceries (£150-£200 per month)

Transportation (student bus pass: £39 per month)

Keep in mind to take into consideration the extra costs like entertainment and course materials.

3. Choose Your Location

Leeds has some great student favorite areas, each has its unique character:

Headingley: A very trendy area known for its lively atmosphere, and its close distance to universities.

Hyde Park: Situated close to the University of Leeds, it is a buzzing activity center with a student population.

City Centre: The only place for people who enjoy city living.

Burley: A more peaceful area with good transport connections.

When choosing your location consider factors like distance to your university, local amenities, and transport options.

4. Explore Different Accommodation Types

Leeds offers a variety of housing options to match various tastes:

Shared houses: Very typical among groups of friends.

Dormitories in purpose-built student accommodations: With modern facilities and social spaces.

A studio apartment: For those who are looking for peace and privacy.

Flats: If you are a small group or a couple this option may be a good fit.

5. Utilize Online Resources

Make use of the web-based realtor tool to make your search more efficient:

Accommodation office of the university

Accommodation websites for students

Social media groups

Websites of local estate agents

6. Consider Uninist: A Rising Star in Student Accommodation

When finding your options do not miss the name of the emerging provider of high-quality student accommodation in Leeds, Uninist. Uninist offers:

New properties with all necessary equipment

Variable length of contract

Support for residents around the clock

The choice of locations within walking distance of the universities and the city amenities

Uninist's focus on developing warm, community-oriented living environments is a major factor that makes them a highly appealing option for students looking for a home away from home.

7. Arrange Viewings

Once you've trimmed down your options, schedule the necessary viewings. This important step gives you the opportunity to:

Look at the property's current state

Acquaint with the other housemates or neighbors

Take a glance at the local area and make an opinion on it

For information about the contracts and facilities, inquire.

Pro tip: Have a list of questions ready in advance to use your time effectively during the viewing.

8. Read the Fine Print

First of all, the contract terms and things that you need to know have to be thoroughly checked before you sign the agreement. Pay attention to:

Length of your tenancy

When will the rent be due?

Amount of the deposit and scheme of the protection

Services and bills that you will have to pay

Who will be responsible for the maintenance

Do not be afraid to ask for an explanation of the unclear points.

9. Secure Your Accommodation

Now that you have found the perfect home, it is time to move to secure it. This usually includes:

The holding deposit payment

The necessary papers (e.g. proof of student status, ID) are provided

The tenancy agreement is signed.

Processing the security deposit as well as the first month's rent

10. Prepare for Move

Now that you have the house, you can go ahead and get ready for the move:

Talk to housemates about the things that you are sharing.

Transportation is needed for your things.

Register essential services like internet and utilities.

Get to know the area.

[imaginarybestie]

Types of audiences

Dear P,

What kinds of audiences might I like to talk to? Or what topics might I like to talk about before an audience, or write about? And what kinds of audiences might be interested? Maybe it's not like I need to think of a type of audience for the subject matter, per se. Maybe I just think of the subject matter itself, and assume, maybe there's some audience for it, somewhere. I might or might not be able to see who this group of people is, or where they exist.

Some groups that might really care about things that I'd like to talk about, and I might not know about the particular group, or how to find "my people", hah. Not that they are really My People, because maybe they aren't. Maybe they're just my audience that would relate if I could share on these certain subjects. And even if there is no real audience who would want to hear it, it's not necessary for there to be a real audience. I just want to make the feeling of there being an audience that cares.

I don't know if I would feel motivated to write about everything for an imaginary audience, because maybe for some things I would need a more strong sense of having someone who really wants to hear what I have to say, who is really there, really cares, and is happy to hear what I have to say, or someone who is helped by hearing the things that I say.

And an imaginary audience is only just barely real in that regard, really, I guess. It's so vague and my mind knows of course, at some level, that it's not real, so even when I try to get into that daydreamy, subconscious kind of half-aware state of imagining, there's still my conscious, rational mind that knows it's not really real. And I think that I can only get so worked up from imagination. It can only do so much for me, and it can only be so convincing. There are limits to what imagination can inspire me to do, and limits to which fantasies feel enjoyable, motivating or beneficial or not.

But the types of imaginary audiences I might write for, and the kinds of subjects that I might write about for them, what would really work, hm... Well, I write about spiritual things on that blog, in a spiritual-oriented community.

And it feels inspiring enough sometimes, because there is a wide array of people who have all kinds of diverse spiritual interests. People who come from all kinds of different backgrounds and follow many different practices and beliefs and values. And all kinds of different personalities too. It all kind of blends together to make this mixture of people who feel like they might realte to all kinds of things, all kinds of sides of myself and my personality, my interests and life and habits and hobbies, and so on.

I know that it's also true that maybe no one is interested in what I write or that those who would be interested don't happen to glance at my blog. Those who do read it might be interested for other reasons, might even be people who misunderstand me or just are only vaguely interested in what I have to say, as they click here and there and everywhere, scrolling and killing time.

Even if that is what is happening, it is just the feeling that maybe someone will read and care that motivates and inspires me. There's enough realistic and believe chance that it could happen, and that makes me want to write.

When I write there, too, I usually write about things which are pretty general to to the group. Knowing that many people have no interest whatsoever in many of my interests and tastes, experiences and habits, I do omit many things which are important to me in my spiritual path. It's just not motivating to write them, because the chance anyone will care is so low. The chance is too great that, instead, several people might mock and judge me for, even if only in their head.

And though I'd never know they if they were mocking and scorning me, still, it seems to echo in my mind and emotions. Call it empathy or maybe it's just my imagination, but when I put certain vulnerable things online for people to see, sometimes I feel like I get dragged down and feel bad, sad, hurt, annoyed, and down, have all the wind taken out of my sails. I don't know why, but that is why I avoid putting things up there that feel too out on a limb in a given community. A little out on a limb is ok, a little weirdness is pleasantly tolerated. But too far out can be too much, and seems to echo back the feeling of judgment and scorn, to me, for some reason.

So with all that in mind, I wonder what categories and types of groups and what kinds of conversations and topics, questions or ideas, etc, I might could share with imaginary audiences. I guess I'll ponder it and see what I can come up with over time. This is a long enough flow of ideas for now. Maybe it will pick up where it leaves off now sometime and my intuition will give me some good ideas.

Bye,

C

[godblackbones15]

Krishna says in the Bhagavad Gita: “Do not bother as to how much water is there in the well; bother to quench your thirst; experience it”.

If we have the experience of the taste of the water, it is as good as tasting the whole water as it is in the well and as it will spring up from the well. That means, we carry the knowledge of the present and the future too.

This is the difference between knowing and experiencing. Incidentally, it is said that Lord Krishna reached our planet via Venus. He put much emphasis upon experiencing truth, than gathering information about truth.

Even during his time there were too many intellectuals and too much information about the cosmic system, the solar system, the planets, the seven kingdoms, the Manvantaras and the seven rays. So much wisdom was available.

It was a wild growth, like a deep forest and people who were pursuing truth were lost in the forest.

⭕ That is what happens to us when we stop living and start acquiring knowledge. The art of living is more important than the art of gathering knowledge. It is better we experience the life that is offered to us.

The principle of Venus lives in us as the urge to experience. Our urge to experience the water of the lake, the snowy mountain peaks or the moonlight, it is all the driving force coming to us from the principle of Venus. This topic emphasizes upon experiencing more than knowing.

This is where we find the clue coming from the Orient: “Do not be hungry for knowledge. Start working with what little knowledge we have to experience it. Knowledge, when experienced, transforms itself as wisdom and we live in it”.

Experiencing even goes up to the point of experiencing death. That is the ultimate of the experience. That is what interested the grandest Initiates on this planet.

Web : World Teacher Trust Org ♀️