#but technically you don’t have to guess because the art includes said crossover characters. but you know

[3584-tropical-fish]

Day three of @podcastgirlsweek :

WIP Wednesday! We all have art/fic/ meta we've been meaning to get to. This is your day to finally commit (as long as your WIP is about podcast women, of course.)

Opened up one of my AU planning documents for this, so: introducing (on my blog, at least) @the-zenith-calls' and my part-crack, part-fix-it, part genuine means of character analysis crossover AU! Possibly the worst way to introduce it, as this doesn't include any of the characters that actually make it a crossover, but it does mark a significant scene for the B-Plot.

(Luckily for me though, Lia has a more proper post about it! Go look at their art, it’s literally so so cool and I love it so much!)

Summary: Georgie had been expecting a fairly peaceful evening, but unfortunately for her, Melanie's post-work gossip session quickly turns into what feels a bit too much like an interrogation from one of their local vessels of horror.

Melanie has had a key to Georgie’s flat for a couple of months now, so Georgie isn’t all too surprised when she opens the door and immediately flops face-first into the couch of the main room with a groan. Georgie decides to let her lie there for a moment, but when a second groan comes from somewhere in the couch cushions, she decides it’s better that she bite the bullet now, rather than let Melanie stew in… whatever it is she’s stewing in.

“What’s wrong?”

Another groan from the couch. “Work.”

Georgie almost laughs at that, but instead says, “You’re going to have to be a little bit more specific than that. Was Jon being an arse?”

Melanie flips herself over on the couch and props herself up on its arm to look at Georgie. “Yeah– well, no. Not really. A bit? It’s more what he’s not doing. And what Martin is.”

“I thought you didn’t talk to Martin anymore.”

“I don’t. No one does, least of all Jon. And that’s just the problem.” She slumps back into the couch. “Jon doesn’t even try to talk to Martin anymore, and Martin decides to make it worse by holing up in his office and blasting music! And his taste is horrible, Georgie, I can’t stand it.”

Georgie stares at the back of the couch. Luckily for her, Melanie can’t see the face she’s making. “That is… not what I was expecting from your ‘everything is spooky’ job.”

“Me neither,” Melanie says, her voice filled with an agony that Georgie had expected to be reserved for “my boss and coworker just performed nonconsensual surgery on me” situations. Apparently, that voice has also been deemed suitable for… whatever this situation is turning out to be. 

“Have you tried to talk to him about it?”

“Yes, actually,” Melanie says, poking her head above the back of the couch again. “And somehow I’ve become his wingman.”

Georgie looks back at her. “I’m sorry?”

“I told him – like a fool – that I’d try and get Jon to talk to him again. Not because I particularly want them to get together! I mean, I do, because they tend to pine at truly unprecedented levels if they are anywhere near each other, but mainly because I need to stop being constantly bombarded with Martin’s music taste if I want to get out of the Archives.”

Georgie continues to stare.

“Of course,” Melanie continues, “I'd much rather Martin just get over him so I don’t have to talk to Jon. But I highly doubt that will happen anytime soon.”

“And why not?” 

“Have you seen the man?” Melanie asks incredulously, and then she tilts her head and reconsiders. “I mean, it’s kind of hard to see him anymore anyways. But you know what I mean.”

Georgie hums. “I suppose I do. Well, just let me know how that one works out for you, alright? I’m expecting updates on the workplace drama now.”

Melanie laughs at that. “As if you don’t get all the workplace drama already.”

Somewhere on a wall just out of Georgie’s line of sight, a door creaks open. She doesn’t notice it, but what she does notice is the voice that comes from just beyond its threshold. It makes her think of shattering glass.

“And do I get any of these workplace updates?”

Melanie almost falls off the couch with how fast she twists around to face whatever it is that has entered Georgie’s apartment uninvited. “Helen!” Her voice gets defensive. “What the hell are you doing here?”

Georgie steps out into the main room to see Helen leaning against the frame of a bright yellow door, her body – or what has to be her body, even if it twists more than a body should – blocking the view of what seems to be an endless corridor on the other side of the door. The colors of the hallway are unlike anything Georgie has ever seen, and there’s something else about it that just seems off-kilter. She can’t quite place it.

Helen herself seems off-kilter, but Georgie can at least point to what it is that makes her look the way she does. Her fingers, for one, are much too long, and her hair curls and twists into spirals that shouldn’t be possible. Her limbs are gangly and bend at awkward angles to fit inside the doorway, and her smile… Georgie isn’t quite certain how to describe it. 

She decides that perhaps it’s best not to try.

“I’m a little out of the loop when it comes to the Archives, these days,” Helen says, tilting her body in something of a shrug. “But I would rather like to have an idea as to what’s going on there, and I can only hope that you’d…” she tilts her head and folds herself around the doorframe, “humor me.”

Melanie crosses her arms and eyes Helen. “And why – exactly – don’t you know what’s going on there? Jon mentioned to me that he hasn’t seen you in a while, and I know that I certainly haven’t seen you recently. Where have you been? Why show up now?”

Helen sits down (where on earth did that chair come from?) and smiles sweetly. “Oh, no reason that matters to you. Now, you were updating us on workplace gossip?”

“I was updating Georgie, actually.”

“And now you’re updating me as well! So, get to it!” She grins. “I brought wine for your troubles.”

Melanie throws her hands up and turns toward Georgie again. “Do you see what I have to deal with? Every day?”

“Yes, hon, I see.”

Melanie stares at her. “You’re no help.”

“She’s not really doing anything, is she?” Georgie asks. “As long as she behaves” – she gives Helen a hard look – “I don’t see why she can’t stay.”

Helen laughs gleefully, and the glasses sitting out on Georgie’s table rattle. Georgie raises her eyebrow. Thankfully, Helen stops laughing, and Georgie takes her place at her kitchen table to listen more carefully to Melanie’s work updates. “Might as well get started now, Melanie, if you want her to leave sooner.”

Melanie groans and flops back onto the couch. “Fine. Fine! I guess she can just stay here, and loom ominously, and–”

“I did say that I brought wine.”

“And I don’t trust your wine!”

“That’s probably a fair judgment,” Helen says, and the wine bottle (which had appeared seemingly out of nowhere at some point during the conversation) disappears under equally befuddling circumstances. Or at the very least, circumstances that Georgie certainly doesn’t understand. “But tell me,” Helen continues, “what’s the whole kerfuffle with Jon and Martin now? I thought by this time those two would have figured themselves out.” She grins again, her teeth sparkling in a way that Georgie knows shouldn’t be possible. “Much like you two have!”

Melanie groans, but begins to explain anyway. “I’m sure you know how Martin is, what with your whole… everything. Poking your head into places where you’re not wanted. And I’ve told Georgie about my gripes about him enough. Take that – volatile already – and combine it with the fact that Jon has apparently made some new friends? Yeah, it’s not–”

“Jon has new friends?” Georgie asks, perking up in her seat.

“Haven’t I told you about them?”

“You might have, but if you did I thought you were joking.”

“Unfortunately for me, I’m not.”

“Who are these people?” Helen asks, with an edge to her voice that Georgie isn’t entirely certain that she likes. 

“You know, I don’t really know!” Melanie says. “Apparently they both came in to give a statement, one after the other, on a day I wasn’t there. And a week or so later, they were set up in the Archives and I’ve basically been avoiding them ever since. Jon’s been telling me ‘Oh, they don’t have anywhere to go right now,’” – this she says in an approximation of Jon’s voice, but doesn’t quite get anywhere close to anything accurate – “But Basira seems to trust them, at least! And Daisy’s out of that coffin now, so I suppose it doesn’t hurt having them around.

“Except, of course, for Martin getting pissy about it.”

Georgie begins to ask a question, but Helen beats her to the punch. “Do you know where they showed up from?”

Melanie shrugs. “I haven’t asked, and they haven’t cared enough to let me know. And really, I don’t care all too much.”

Georgie leans back in her chair. “Why do you want to know, Helen?”

The smile never once drops off her face as she answers, “I like to know what’s going on, is all. It’s good to be connected in this great, wide world of ours, and currently my connections are a little… lacking at the moment.” She stands suddenly and claps her hand, the echo bouncing strangely off the walls of Georgie’s flat. “Same time next week, then, girls? Sounds like a plan!”

Before either of them can say a word in protest, the door behind her swings open and she steps backwards through it with a polite wave. The click of the door as it closes leaves no room for any argument. 

[the-phoenix-heart]

10 Amazing Futurama Comics

There is a severe lack of Futurama content on this and other sites (seriously, the Night at the Museum movies have more fics than Futurama). And, nobody posts about the Futurama comics. So I’m posting 10 of my favorites.

10. Attack of the 50-Foot Amy (Issue #33)

It’s actually not as sexual as the cover makes it out to be. The basic premise is that Amy mistakes the can of growth spray (that Cubert and Dwight want to use for their science fair project) for hair spray and sprays waaaay too much before her anniversary date with Kif. Meanwhile, Bender teaches Fry the wonders of video piracy, but after he gets scared by a movie home alone style he eats his disc of pirated movies and starts uncontrollably acting them out. You can probably guess how these two plots connect.

While I do list this one as one of my favorites, it’s far from perfect. The artwork is good, but the scaling on Amy is very wonky so she looks more like a twenty-foot Amy (also Dwight’s eyes are drawn weird in this comic, he looks blazed out the entire time). But I cannot help but be charmed by this comic. It’s got some sweet Bender and Fry friendship moments and actually makes me believe Kif and Amy’s relationship for a little bit. They are very sweet in this comic, although Kif does go through some pain in this comic.

Best moments: They way they resolve the plot is actually pretty funny and clever, plus Bender hopped up on pirated movies is a joy. At one point Fry gets shoved by Steven Spielbot (don’t ask) and Bender goes all Rocky on his ass saying “No one talks to my gal, Adrian, like that!” It’s very sweet and...subtextual if you understand my meaning. This one also has anti comic book piracy message at the end which was ironic for me to read.

9. Doctor What (Issue #32)

The Professor creates a time traveling port-a-potty so that you can pee in whatever time and space you want, although it’s completely random. However, Zoidberg accidentally breaks the potty, so him, Leela, Fry, and Bender have to keep randomly flushing to get back home. On each of these new worlds Zoidberg keeps accidentally saving the citizens, getting medals, and ends up becoming addicted to the fame he keeps winning. Which leads to them getting stuck in a post apocalyptic New New York.

This is the infamous Leela-Bender-Fry fusion comic, Leelan von Fry-Bot. His backstory is actually a little sad, but I won’t spoil it here. This one is pretty good, because it has Zoidberg as the hero. Actually quite a few of these feature Zoidberg as a fourth member of the delivery crew which is weird, but not entirely unwelcome. It’s also fun to see these other worlds, and now that I think about it it’s actually a little similar to The Late Phillip J. Fry, what with the time travel to different interesting worlds.

Best Moments: I actually liked Leelan’s backstory, and his interactions with his ���parents” (you’ll understand when you read it) are actually pretty funny and a little cute. Fry really wants to be a dad you can tell.

8. The Simpsons Futurama Crossover Crisis II

The professor creates a device that takes characters out of their stories into the real world. Trouble is, he tells the mayor that this invention is useful because you can get slave labor out of the characters because they technically have no constitutional rights. The Simpsons end up working with the Planet Express crew, but an accident leads to the release of ALL FICTIONAL CHARACTERS EVER.

This is a sequel comic to the Futurama Simpsons Infinitely Secret Crossover Crisis (fun fact: a reference to several famous comic book arcs). I chose this one above it though because I think it understood the assignment better. The original is funny, but I just don’t think that Springfield is a good setting for a Futurama crossover. Springfield for all its zaniness, is not the future. New New York, however, is great for this crossover. We get several scenes where we see the Simpsons going through space and fighting off monsters. We even get to see the other residents of Springfield in the future, Mr. Smithers becomes a space pirate and Mr. Burns falls in love with Mom, it’s great.

Best Moments: Some of them I already mentioned, but I cannot stress enough how hilarious the Burns-Mom romance is, it’s especially good when you can hear their voices in your head. I also like the friendship the Simpsons have with the Planet Express crew.

7. Six Characters in Search of a Story (Issue #14)

This is a very interesting comic. The Professor falls asleep, so to pass the time the crew decides to look through his old failed inventions, and well, that’s a very bad idea. The most interesting thing about this comic is it’s designed so that if you want you can only read certain panels to follow one person’s story. The Futurama comics do this a lot of the time and it’s always interesting.

The shenanigans that occur in this one are really funny, and there are some great looking pages in this. Also the Futurama crew clearly took ideas from the comics, and this is one of them. You can tell from the cover art that this does have elements of “Benderama” in it, what with Bender cloning himself ad infinitum. I also really like the climax, it’s a little schmultz-y for Futurama, but I don’t mind.

Best Moments: Fry gets stuck with a Spanish speaking Bender and I don’t know why but it’s really funny to me. The professor also gets some funny moments in this one. And Scruffy. Scruffy is always a delight.

6. Igner-ance is Bliss! (Issue #63)

Yeah this is the infamous robot Leela and Fry comic. Don’t worry, like the cover says, it’s not as dramatic as it looks. The crew has to go to a world that’s too dangerous for humans, so Fry, Leela, and Zoidberg all have their consciousnesses put into robot doubles so they can make the delivery. However, it turns out this planet is a sort of getaway spa for robots, and the crew decides to party it up there, at least until Bender discovers that this is a front for an evil plot by Mom. The subplot is mostly about how Igner is not respected by his brothers.

This one is fun, and I love a comic where Bender has to be the voice of reason. It is clearly killing him to be the responsible one, but I love it. Also, I have a soft spot for Igner, so it’s nice to see him get thrown a bone for once. This also has some really fun jokes with everyone, but Zoidberg in particular gets some bangers. I think my only problem is it ISN’T as cool as the cover makes it out, but like I’m happy with what it is.

Best Moments: Fry beats up Bender at one point and wins, I think he deserved it. Also, y’all know Admiral Ackbar from Star Wars? He makes some cameos in this one. Also all the robots (sans Bender) make a Japanese style mecha and it’s the coolest thing ever. Plus everything I’ve said about Igner I love in this one. Oh also Fry beats Calculon at poker and I really love that.

5. Who’s Dying to be a Gazillionaire? (Issue #5)

This one is sweet. The IRS is threatening to bankrupt Planet Express, and if they can’t think of a way to make a million dollars they will go out of business. No one really has any ideas and doesn’t even really care, except for Fry who is determined to save Planet Express. He gets the idea to go onto Who Wants to be a Gazillionaire to make the money, even though it’s a trivia show and if he loses he will die.

This one really warms my heart, it’s Fry at his best, just doing what he can for the people he loves. Even the professor is great in this one. I don’t want to spoil it, but trust me when I say it’s good (god I hope I’m not building this up too much).

Best moments: The end panel. But also the resolution of the story is great, and I really appreciate this comic for Fry as a character.

4. Rumble in the Jungle (Issue #38)

This is a fine comic. Leela is mad that she’s not being respected by Fry and Bender, and it’s bad enough that they don’t believe her when she says they’re going to crash into a planet. They end up parachuting down and getting separated. Leela ends up as queen of some workers in the “Amazon,” meanwhile Fry finds Bender’s corpse and goes off to avenge him.

This one is fun, and another fun one for Fry, because he’s determined to avenge Bender and works hard for it. This also includes the original Frender, not the ship but fusion. Leela and Fry even have a fight scene against each other and it’s honestly great.

Best Moments: Fry is great throughout the entire comic, and Leela spends most of her time beating up random animals. Bender also using a lead parachute he made out of toys he stole from children is funny, especially because I’m always a sucker for Bender doing dumb shit.

3. Don’t Go Taking My Heart! (Issue #69) (nice)

Mom only has a couple weeks to live, unless she can get a heart transplant. It’s revealed that Mom uses the cryogenics lab to get new body parts for herself, and that Fry was supposed to be her heart donor! Unfortunately, because he was unfrozen she now has to get him to work for Mom Corp to make sure his heart stays intact for the procedure.

If you can’t tell I love the Fry-centric comics, and I also like the comics where Mom is the villain. Of course this comic doesn’t go completely how you expect it to go, it’s actually REALLY sweet. I also love the fact that in this comic Fry actually makes a great intern. He basically has the job of a secretary and he’s GOOD at it. And I love seeing when Fry is good at things. The reason why I put this at only 3 is because it doesn’t really have a subplot. Bender gets a job at mom corp to but it’s only there for a couple pages, and Leela’s new crew gets two panels and that’s it.

Best Moments: The moments with Mom and Fry, but also guess who Mom’s doctor is? I’m actually not going to reveal it because it’s so random but also hilarious.

2. Boomsday! (Issue #58)

The Professor builds Bender his own parents, as a way to placate/discipline Bender. However, these parents decide that Fry is a bad influence on Bender, leading to them kicking him out. Meanwhile, the Professor’s doomsday devices are all stolen, and he has to go find them.

Both of these plots are funny and good. Bender’s plot is also really sweet what with his friendship with Fry, and his wish for parents. Meanwhile the Professor’s plot is just really funny and I do love seeing the Professor in his element. The ending is mostly heartwarming.

Best Moments: Everything with Fry and Bender, and Bender has a sweet relationship with his fake parents. Also, the Professor uses Issac Asimov candles on the robot mafia which I found a great joke. Oh, and the Professor’s first doomsday device was made when he was four years old and I love that. The end of the comic also has very nice message.

1. Rotten to the Core (Issue #27)

The world’s weather has gone kerflooey, and the Professor has figured out that his invention that can drill into the center of the Earth has been used. It conspires that Bender sold it at a yard sale to some aliens call the magmoids. The magmoids are trying to steal magma from the Earth’s core and the crew has to go and stop them.

This is my favorite because it’s a great character comic. All of the main three have great moments, and it’s also a great science comic. The Earth’s core is incredibly magnetic so of course Bender starts spouting out folk songs, and also SECRETS. I can’t believe no one has used the fact that canonically magnets make Bender incapable of telling lies. Anyway, it’s just really fun.

Best Moments: Way too many to count. Bender and Fry are told to cut out the “Brokeback Moanin,’“ Leela and Fry are bitter at the end, Fry tells story about his childhood, Bender has some great secrets to tell, the Professor gets a really fun ending, Bender has a rare moment of generosity, and the entirety of the climax is all kinds of fun and sweet.

[ts-unsolved]

Final Wrap-up for Chapter One

((since chapter one will be coming to a close shortly and there is still an assortment of questions left over, here is a masterpost of responses to queries that couldn’t be addressed during the story! 

[reminder: the ask box will be left open, however the characters are not available. please keep in mind that non-plot related questions will not be answered by the characters after this post.]

Anonymous said: ((Just wanted to tell you your drawings are so pretty and I love ur blog. That is all I have no braincells to ask questions))

Anonymous said: OKAY MOD I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW I LOVE THIS AU SO MUCH AND ITS SO COOL AND GOOD AND YOUR ART IS TOO!! sorry for caps I’m just excited

Thank you! Sorry I didn’t always get around to answering asks like this, but for every one that was sent in, I appreciated it with all my heart. You guys are angels 💖

Anonymous said: What is one haunted location you guys would really like to visit someday?

Poveglia is definitely the highest on the list for the notoriety alone, although they would likely never get the permission to go (the history in general is almost excessively horrible and tragic, so nothing good would come out of doing an episode there. Maybe it’d be good as a final-chapter type location? 🤔).

@anxious-fander-bean​ said: Hey Logan, have you ever tried swing dancing? It's really fun and good excersize! There's also a lot of bouncing and upbeat music, so Patton might enjoy it as well! ((I'm doing it. I need the qpp boys to be happy and have fun, bc they deserve it.))

(LOGAN: I’ll...consider it.)

You did it, you got them to go on some good ol’ platonic dates! B)

Anonymous said: I feel bad that I don't have any deep question or something along those lines, but what's your favorite thing to bake, Pat? - 💐

That’s alright! Questions don’t have to be deep to be fun/interesting. 

(PATTON: Cupcakes! You can make so many different flavors, and there are tons of fun ways to decorate them!)

@why-should-i-tell-youu2 said: Why cant anyone else see the seal?

You need to have The Sight to be able to see demon sigils. Patton has this ability naturally, and Dee has it because Elliott taught it to him. Otherwise, Virgil and Roman would be the closest in terms of gaining this ability, but a scared/skeptical part of them is holding them back. 

Anonymous said: My good dorks, is there a way to, I don’t know, get a better/more effective charm for your office? One that costs more than $10? -🍁

Anonymous said: Hey, Logan, potential naturalistic explanation for ya: depending on what the charm was made of, shifts in ambient room temperature could have caused minuscule expansions and contractions in the material that would eventually crack the charm. Do I believe my own explanation? Absolutely not. Am I grasping at straws for a non-supernatural explanation? Absolutely. And ambient room temperature doesn’t even begin to explain the red symbol around the charm

(LOGAN: Our budgeting is already a mess as it is, the last thing we need is to waste more funds on decorations. And that theory seems much more reasonable than the contrary explanation.)

Anonymous said: Is the demon that Pavreen summoned the same demon that possessed Elliott?

Anonymous said: Welp Virge SUMMONED A DEMON- (Why do I have a feeling Remy was the demon that possessed Elliot-)

Nope, they’re all different demons! The demon that Parveen summoned is notoriously difficult to contact, so a bunch of teenagers wouldn’t have been able to do it. Likewise for Remy; you can only summon him once you have his True Name, and he’s already destroyed most references to that (sorry Patton).

Anonymous said: omg omg omg what part of mythology is remy part of???

He’s not from any particular mythology, but he is partly based off of Alps from German folklore and the general mythology around sleep paralysis!

Anonymous said: Can Patton see supernatural beings like ghosts and demons and stuff? I just think it would be interesting if his scars make him able to see them :3c

Anonymous said: If both Dee and Patton can see the sigil, and Dee can see ghosts, does that mean Pat can see ghosts too? With the whole red glowing thing (forgot what its called) it seems to be connected.

Yes he can see ghosts/demons, and you’re right that the scars (or rather the deal with the demon which gave him his powers and scars) are what lead to him being able to do it. The red is just a general indicator of something supernatural/not of our Realm.

Anonymous said: Wait so if Patton and his family all have that mark could that mean Patton is not completely human 👀 -🌈

I supposed you could say that Patton’s not entirely human because he’s a witch who was born without a soul, but he’d find that pretty offensive tbh.

Anonymous said: Are Elliott and Patton maybe related, even distantly? Also, roman needs to suck it up and have Feelings for the Snake Man

There’s no relation between Elliott and Patton. Elliott is the child of a seer and a psychic, Patton is the son of witches. They’re similar, but different. (Also you’re assuming that Roman hasn’t liked the Snake Man since high school, but considered him off-limits because he’s his brother’s best friend).

Anonymous said: Does Patton know that Dee can see spirits and does Dee know that Patton is protecting them all?

Anonymous said: Dee, pat, do you know that each other can see the sigil? 

Anonymous said: is ... is patton a witch and dee a dee-mon and that's why they don't like each other.....?

Anonymous said: Pat what do you think about making deals with demons?

They’re both aware of each other’s secrets! Technically they’re both doing their best to protect everyone, but that doesn’t mean they agree with each other’s methods or bond over the shared responsibility. 

Patton is indeed a witch, and Dee is a regular human who happened to summon a demon one time. Patton thinks Dee is the occult equivalent of a satanist, which he disagrees with because dark magic is unnatural/dangerous in his eyes (making deals with demons only leads to trouble!), and would prefer Dee not endanger his friends. Dee doesn’t like Patton because of his perceived moral superiority, and finds the way he can be so secretive and two-faced creepy 

Regardless, they’re both sitting in glass houses and have more in common than they think.

Anonymous said: Patton Should Hug Dee *

Maybe. But he won’t. 8′D

Anonymous said: Since Dee has been able to see ghosts for a long time, was he an open believer in ghosts before Elliot died? Since it was mentioned that the reason he lies about his belief is because he knows that they're dangerous, he wouldn't have had a reason to hide it in the past. And if he did are any of the others aware of the belief change? Well, besides Remus. I'm guessing that one is pretty obvious.

He may have been more involved as a believer in the past, though that doesn’t mean he was ever super open about it. He was aware of how it would look like to outsiders (being genuinely skeptical at one point himself), so he wasn’t going to paint a target on his back by talking about ghosts and demons and things most people can’t see.

Of course, that didn’t stop people from stereotyping and making those sorts of assumptions about their friend group anyway, but no one besides them really knew about their secret-- not even Virgil.

Anonymous asked: What would happen if one time, the gang ended up getting something supernatural on camera?

The result of that would depend on the being. Ghosts can kinda appear on camera, although it’s very rare for them to appear as a full bodied apparition, which is why they usually only manifest in spirit orbs or light/shadows. Poltergeists are better since they’re able to interact with objects, but likewise since they can’t manifest into a physical form they can easily be brushed off. Demons and other miscellaneous creatures will straight up not appear if captured directly on film; you’ll simply get video glitches and distortions.  

So essentially, they may technically have found something already, but capturing evidence that’s also compelling is a lot more difficult than you’d think. I imagine there’s a good chance that anything legitimate wouldn’t get taken too seriously because of how easy it is to fake evidence nowadays.

Anonymous said: Okay so a little bit of a rant but not really ig but imagine the ladylike and unsolved crossover for this AU like I can see it as like Thomas' friends dressing up Roman and Dee in style and seeing a blushing mess and maybe flirting going on because of how good the clothing complements each other but this is kinda a weak idea lol

It’s not a weak idea at it, it’s really cute! (though I may just have a soft spot for the Ladylike cast and crossovers). 

The only thing to note is that I’ve chosen not to include Thomas’ friends in this AU because I personally weird about writing fiction about real people? (I was on the fence about including character!Thomas for a while too, tbh). So, apologies to anyone who’s sent similar asks or wanted to see any of Thomas’ friends; they wont be around!

Anonymous said: Did Dee and Remus ever have that talk Dee said he would try to have a while back????

They might have gotten the opportunity to chat back when Remus came back to help shoot the Room 1046 video. It wouldn’t have been a complete reconciliation by any means (dealing with years of baggage in one sitting is Hard), but now Remus is aware that Dee is open to discuss things again at some point in the future, so progress!

Anonymous said: wait wHAT?! When did he (Emile Picani) die?? Give us the deets oh wise one

Anonymous said: emile is... dead? what happened?

I see y’all, but unfortunately you’re not getting any answers from me just yet! You’ll have to wait until the next chapter~.

Anonymous said: Shit is about to go down and I am worried about the next ghost "adventure"

:) Don’t Worry About It.))

[cryptoriascollectiblog]

Monster High doll collecting Questionnaire - answered

Finally had time to take photos for this thing. Hope it’s worth the wait!

1) Introduce yourself and tell us how long you’ve been collecting Monster High dolls! Hey y’all! My name’s Tori and I’ve been collecting Monster High since I think...either the end of 2014 or early 2015. Before S5 of the webisodes aired. 

2) How many MH dolls do you have?

Can I just say “a lot” and leave it at that? I kid I kid. I have like 27 Monster High dolls. That may not seem like a lot but I swear I just had 13 like four dolls ago...fingers crossed I didn’t forget to count anyone. That’s a sign of too many dolls :’D I also have two vinyl MH figures (Frankie and Draculaura) and a Rock Candy Draculaura figure.

3) Is Monster High your favorite doll line? Why or why not? Yes. Yes it is. Forever and ever. Took me a little while to realize it but as I accumulated dolls I realized most of my passion for collecting (as well as creative inspiration) revolved almost entirely around Monster High. That line is perfect for me in every way: tied to/inspired by classic Monsters, bold and edgy gothic fashion, a unique art style...I can’t tell you how much I’ve evolved as a creative individual since embracing my love of Monster High.

4) Who’s your favorite MH ghoul? 

I wish Cupid had stuck around in MH a little longer. I would’ve loved an elaborate dress (and makeup) for her!

5) Favorite Manster? My favorite Manster is actually Andy Beast from Skull Shores. Since he never reappeared in more than background shots and Mattel never produced a doll of him I’ll go with this guy:

6) Do you own any dolls of your favorite ghoul and/or manster? How many? I own one Deuce doll, his Boo York doll. He came with Cleo and I love Boo York Cleo so I had to get both. I actually hate how the writing team handled Deuce and their relationship in the movie: as far as I’m concerned it isn’t canon. (He fell so far from Ghouls Rule! Definitely the best part of that movie including his friendship with Frankie.)

I own many Frankie and Draculaura dolls. Stay tuned for pics~

7) Do you own any playsets? If so which one(s)? If not, is there a reason?

I found this at a thrift store. It didn’t have any accessories though. Still, I’m glad I own it <3 Considering I photograph Draculaura more than any of my other dolls.  I do wish I had another playset--either the catacombs or the Deadlux high school: they’d make such great backdrops for photography! Sadly I have no space.

8) Of the original main ghouls (including Ghoulia, Spectra and Abbey) which is your favorite? Got any dolls of them?

TA~DA! I’d actually also love to add Ghouls Rule Frankie to my collection but she’s not an immediate must-have.

9) Favorite character with only one doll release?

I know there were technically two but they’re essentially the same doll so it doesn’t count.

10) Character with too many dolls (in your opinion?) Uh...Toralei honestly. I don’t like her, I’ve never liked her but she pops up a lot more than I expected. Is this so there’s a matching bully in some of these sets or is she that popular and I’m the odd one out?

11) Any character you would’ve liked to see in a doll line that didn’t make it? (i.e. Lagoona in Sweet Screams or Draculaura in Power Ghouls, etc) Apart from another C.A. Cupid doll in like Dawn of the Dance or Dot Dead Gorgeous (can you imagine??) I would’ve loved to see Draculaura in Freak du Chic. I’m aware she had a Scarnival doll but that’s not the same thing. I want a doll with a similar design to her circus mini. I also think adding Lagoona to the “Scarily Ever After” line would’ve been neat (a la Little Mermaid, of course.) I know we saw her as a Mermaid in Great Scarier Reef” but I would’ve loved to see one with a fairytale twist.

Also more Sweet Screams dolls. Best line ever <3

12) Any ideas you would’ve liked to see in a doll line? An eighties glam-rock n roll band stylized after Jem and the Holograms but with a gothic edge. I’m not talking Fierce Rockers, I mean all of the core ghouls (with Ghoulia as like the manager) along with a better-designed Clawdeen. I didn’t mind what we got but she wasn’t “outrageous” enough for me. 

Also a “vintage-themed” line as an homage to the ghouls’ famous parents (including Operetta.)

13) Is there a “grail” MH doll for you? If so do you own it? I feel like my grail dolls keep changing. For a long time it was Collector Draculaura, then OG draculaura, then Dawn of the Dance Draculaura...then Ghouls Rule Frankie and the whole Sweet Screams crew. I guess I can’t make up my mind ^^; Truthfully I have most of these now so I’m pretty content with my collection. I still want a couple older dolls (CLAWDEEN and maybe OG Lagoona) as I’ve said and I must have all the Sweet Screams dolls. Beyond that I’m good. 

14) Thoughts on the cancelled Ever After High crossover? Okay so I will be forever annoyed Mattel didn’t wait to reboot everything until after the crossover. That said what I saw in the storyboards and posts floating around didn’t really impress me. There’s so much potential here and I feel like Mattel took the easiest route possible with it. If you’re going to crossover these two lines a) go ALL out with the designs and b) INVOLVE C.A. CUPID. Plus we’ll never know now if Astra Nova is the blue fairy/her daughter.

15) Thoughts on the 2016 reboot faces?

Why Mattel. Why was this necessary. 

With Vampirina and now Super Monsters you really should’ve stuck with your older audience. Or saved the “Monster Family” line exclusively for said younger audience and just scaled down the original line to remind your older crowd, collectors included, why we love this line. 

Heck, at this point I’d be happy with detailed collector-only lines released on like Amazon. A limited line is better than no Monster High at all, especially if it’s highly detailed and exceptionally spooky.

16) Thoughts on the 2016 “Monster Family” line?

So I like the idea behind this line but loathe the articulation. I held off buying Alivia and Kelpie for a long time because I hoped for better quality with later releases. Whoops. All of this said there was potential here to attract a younger crowd exclusively with a brighter and less-articulated family line. Siblings or not they could’ve avoided directly crossing over by merely mentioning the OG ghouls, instead focusing on friendships and relationships with their parents. That’s what I’d have done at least.

17) How bout the SDCC exclusives? What was your favorite? Do you own any? No and I wish I did ;-; While I wasn’t as impressed with them as the Ever After High exclusives I would’ve loved a Hexiciah doll. He’s actually my favorite “manster.” (Heck! You could’ve incorporated him into the crossover, being as he’s half fairy!) I should check ebay...

18) How about Amazon exclusives? I have two! The amazing and unique Draculaura who as far as I’m concerned is the best MH doll ever released and Zomby Gaga. The others never impressed me or lived up to the same quality promised in the first exclusive. I just couldn’t pass up a Lady Gaga monster!

19) Favorite Frankie Stein doll?

Aaah this is tough. All the Frankies I own are my favorite ^^; Sweet Screams, Freaky Fusion, her classroom doll I turned into a fearleading one, and while I don’t own her original doll (mine is the 2014 release) I love that one two. I also like Wave 2 Frankie and as I said Ghouls Rule. (Honestly though I thiiiiink Sweet Screams is number one...which is funny because I did not want her when I first started collecting. For whatever reason I thought I’d be happy with one doll of each character. Again I say: whoops)

20) Favorite Draculaura doll?

21) Favorite Clawdeen Wolf doll? Freak du Chic, her OG doll and I think Boo York. I’m so mad her outfit isn’t more stylish. Sometimes I wonder if it’s worth it to buy her and like one of her fashion packs...but that’s actually more expensive on Amazon than her original doll! 

22) Favorite Cleo de Nile doll?

Originally Dawn of the Dance wasn’t a favorite but now that I own the doll I realize just how much she stands out (why wasn’t purple lipstick used more often???)

23) Favorite Lagoona Blue doll? Skull Shores, her OG doll and I think Dawn of the Dance. I’m not a big fan of the mohawk but I appreciate the detail in her outfit...plus I love blue makeup.

24) Favorite Ghoulia Yelps doll?

 I also like Sweet Screams (although she’s my least favorite of the line) and Dawn of the Dance. Honestly maybe I should’ve set my sights on that whole line XD Except I’m not the biggest fan of the Clawdeen and Frankie.

25) Favorite Spectra Vondergeist doll? I’m not as familiar with Spectra’s dolls but I think either Dot Dead Goregeous or Ghouls Night Out.

26) Favorite Abbey Bombinable doll? Sweet Screams <3

27) Favorite Venus McFlytrapp doll? Zombie Shake

28) Favorite Rochelle Goyle doll? Zombie Shake

29) Favorite Operetta doll? Either or OG doll or Scaritage (the latter kind of reminds me of Lucille Ball for whatever reason)

30) Favorite Toralei Stripe doll? I’m really not a fan of her dolls (Orange is such a hard color to compliment correctly) but I do kind of like the stark design in her Fierce Rockers doll.

31) Favorite Jinafire Long doll? I’m not a big fan of her dolls either (I feel the same way about Green that I do Orange) so I’ll say her “New Scaremester” doll.

32) Favorite Skelita Calaveras doll? Scarnival! I’m still half-tempted to purchase this doll one day...provided I can find her!

33) Favorite Howleen Wolf doll? Her original doll. I wish she hadn’t switched to straight/pink hair! The orange stood out in a good way. Someday I hope I find her in a thrift store...

34) Favorite Twyla Bogeyman doll? Freak du Chic

35) What do you do with your dolls? (Display them, take photos of them, etc) I display them, sometimes change their poses and I take photos! I’m still an amateur at that but I’m learning as I go and I think I’ve improved!

36) Is Monster High the only doll line you collect? Why or why not? Sort of? It’s the only line I primarily collect now. I keep my eye on a couple others in case something catches my eye but like I said I’m low on space.  Some of my other collections include: Ever After High (complete with maybe the exception of TriCastleon Lizzie Hearts one day) Super Heroes (this also includes high quality collectibles. One day I’d like Mystique but she’s only available on ebay and out of my price range right now. Plus I’ve found the production condition of each varies...) Disney Princesses/Frozen (sometimes I tell myself I should get Mulan for varying reasons but I’ve only taken photos of my Elsa doll so what does that tell you) Vampirina + Hotel Transylvania (This includes toys as well. HT seems to have wrapped up for the time being and as I’ve stated numerous times I’m fickle with Vampirina merchandise. Nonetheless both of these are technically ongoing) Equestria Girls (Done unless Hasbro releases a new Adagio Dazzle doll. Also fashion packs or  a dAYDREAM SHIMMER DOLL COME ON--ahem-- I’m still planning to get rid of most of my older dolls.) I tried getting into Disney’s “Attractionistas” but only acquired two before they stopped selling in the parks. To be honest the quality dropped anyway and they’ve only got basic articulation. I’m not sure I’m going to keep the ones I have...we’ll see.

37) Do you still collect Monster High dolls? (i.e. scour the internet and/or secondhand stores?) Technically? I got three for Christmas and still poke my head in thrift stores now and then. For the most part though I’m essentially finished, I only say I keep going because there are a few older dolls I will definitely have someday.

38) There’s a lot of new Monster doll/toy lines out now: thoughts if any? H’okay so here’s the Earth--

jk jk I’m old XD

I make it a point to investigate new Monster lines: monsters are my life, nothing gives me greater creative fuel so it is my duty!

Right now there are technically three others out there although like I said, Hotel Transylvania seems to be out of stores. Don’t know if it’s still available on Amazon. The other two are Vampirina and Super Monsters. I’ve talked about them before--they’re largely for a much younger crowd, even younger than the MH reboot audience but there are some highlights for us older collectors if you love monsters as much as I do. I’m a big fan of world building and the spooky aesthetic: I love seeing how different franchises approach this. Character designs too: it can be a little tricky in the “family friendly monster” genre: a successful one balances spooky with well...friendly. I think Vampirina is most successful in this department. Super Monsters leans more towards the cutesy side.  That said, I actually prefer their world set up over Vampirina. As well as the approach to being a monster which isn’t surprising since Vampirina is essentially one giant whimsical metaphor. 

Super Monsters has only just joined the merchandise department which I know I’ve said before. I look forward to seeing how it evolves. Vampirina too: most of the toys, while cute, are more “toy” than doll and I’m not a big fan of gimmicks so I haven’t bought any of the singing dolls. Fingers crossed we get something a little more...elaborate? Even if it’s just a limited release (I do love the one figure/doll I have though! Best of the merchandise released so far <3)

Going back quickly to Hotel Transylvania...I maintain Jazware’s wasn’t the best choice of manufacturer. So many little things that needed a touch more thought. Although I will give them points for clothing quality and faceup!

39) And finally, what’s your favorite thing about Monster High? Can be past or present!

I think I’ve covered why I love it throughout this questionnaire: Monster High inspires me. It came into the world fresh and with a lot of creative power behind it. It turned so many heads and shook up the doll world as we know it. It brought monsters back into the light and that’s never gone away. If anything it’s blown up even more: that may not have happened without Monster High. Was the writing great? No. But the theme songs, the designs and especially the original lessons taught stood out on their own: Be yourself. Be unique. Be a monster.

Hell yeah, Monster High <3

[cassyblue]

A very long post on my onions about JJBA

I am completely caught up with the JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure manga. Took me two weeks to do it. But my brain hasn’t been up to reading novels/novellas since concentration whomst? Once the semester starts, I tend to read more comics than novels just because of time constraints. I am still on Part 3 of the JJBA anime. It’s an anime that I just can’t binge because it is a lot. I really like JJBA because it takes the shonen fighting manga and just turns it into a fever dream. So below is my thoughts on Parts 1-8, includes many a spoiler. Also as it goes on I get more sweary sorry. 

Part 1: Phantom Blood

Not my favorite arc, but it is the first part so I feel it doesn’t have the same level of writing/art as the next parts because Araki is starting out. It’s pretty tightly written and straight forward. Jonanthan is my least favorite Jojo. I think my main problem with this part is the assertion that Dio is evil due to the abusive environment he grew up in. That’s pretty much what I can say about Part 1. 

Part 2: Battle Tendency 

Part 2 is more complex and the characters have more growth than those in Part 1. I enjoy Joseph as a protagonist since he is a good combo of little shit and dumb teenager. The enemies to friends arc with Caesar is great. Throw two dramatic bitches together and the chaos that ensues is fun. I really liked that the best user of haman is a woman because the previous part was pretty dude heavy. Liz Lisa is on the fine line between fan service and sexy. But the fanservice doesn’t happen during fighting so I can forgive Araki on certain parts. The thing about Part 2 that really stands out to me is the expansion of the worldbuilding. It doesn’t feel overwhelming and fits neatly into the narrative. My other thought is that Araki just likes drawing asses. 

Part 3: Stardust Crusaders

Oh boy, so this is where I start to have a lot more onions. Everything I knew about JJBA before watching/reading was that there was this thing called a stand and everyone was gangsters. So when I started JJBA I was like tumblr lied to me what the hell is going on. Unlike Joseph in Part 2, Jotaro is just an asshole, a well meaning asshole, but still an asshole. Through this entire arc, Jotaro literally does not grow as a character unlike Part 2 with Joseph which is super frustrating. In Part 2, Joseph goes from cocky punk kid to more responsible and level headed kid with self discipline. Jotaro’s fighting ability literally gets no training whatsoever compared to Joseph. In the 45 days that the plot takes place, I would have thought that Avdol would have at least did some sort of training since he is the most experienced stand user. But nope that sure didn’t happen. The bickering between Joseph and Jotaro is enjoyable and the side characters are good humor relief. I think that’s where my frustration is -- Kakyoin and Polnareff have more character development than Jotaro does. Polnareff is in many ways a foil for Jotaro in that he ACTUALLY learns to accept help and so on. 

Things I did like was the introduction of stands. Thought there could have been better explanation but it’s JJBA so you know it’s going to not be there or it will be there eventually. I think this arc has ok writing but Part 2 was more solid. 

Part 4: Diamond is Unbreakable

I really liked this part. It was more of a slice of life comic with mayhem. I felt that compared to Part 3, Part 4 does a better job with depicting teenagers. Josuke and his friends are literally dumbasses 80% of the time and Koichi has their one brain cell most of the time. Part 4 also dives much deeper into the origins of stands as well. 

What I liked was how the mystery parts of the comic were interspersed with the comedy parts. The previous arc was pretty straight forward without much diversion to have more insight into the characters. Part 4 is much more focused on relationships and has a psychological bent to the story. Unlike until the end of Part 3, Josuke and friends work as a team very quickly. The other part that I liked was the incredibly awkward Joestar family reunion.  Part 4 just has the most depth for me out of all the parts so far. 

The other part that I liked was the evolution of stands -- that some stands can grow and others have remote abilities and so forth. 

My biggest beef with this part is Araki totally doesn’t understand how graduate school works. Like ok first off, why the hell did Jotaro choose to do marine biology?? Want some background on that which we never get. When Jotaro is introduced, his specialty is whales and sharks (which i am sure he punched a shark at some point) but then at the end Araki decides that Jotaro’s doctoral work is on starfish? Um like ok what the fuck here. That’s a HUGE jump to do in academia in terms of changing your study organism. Like for me jumping from lepidoptera to hymenoptera was incredibly painful and that’s just WITHIN one ORDER (insects). Here Jotaro is jumping PHYLUMS. The other thing is that it takes uuuuh 6 years max to do your doctorate. So idk how Jotaro is able to do his entire dissertation in 3 months. It’s taken me two and a half years just to get my experiments done for my master’s degree. My advisor has given me two months to write my thesis, BUT I ALREADY HAVE MY DATA???? Jotaro would have had to collect all the data and speed write and I have no fucking clue how the hell he would even pass the defense even if he wasn’t also investigating a serial killer. Pretty sure the whole marine biology thing is just a cover so he has jstor access for everything related to stands. 

Part 5: Golden Wind

I didn’t expect to like this arc. But I did. It’s the arc that tumblr spoke of. First off, it has the perfect balance of dumbass to incomprehensible. Part of why I like JJBA is that you can see Araki’s art evolution and this is the first arc where he has completely gone from ripped as fuck dudes to twinks. That being said this is the arc that has the first plot hole and I only have a few theories as to why. It starts with Jotaro sending Koichi to Italy to investigate Giorno who is Dio’s biological son from his return in Part 3. This entire arc when I was live texting it to my best friend probably receives the most what the fucks in her replies. TD;LR: Giorno technically Joestar because Dio stole the body of Jonathan Joestar to make his comeback because you would think Araki for once has some somewhat reasonable biology here. Surprise fucker, Giorno’s hair turns blond once his stand ability awakens because he’s Dio’s son. So the whole Jotaro investigating Giorno thing is COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN. My only explanation is Koichi is like yeah he’s an idiot kid and I don’t think he’s going to be a problem or Polnareff calls up Jotaro and is like yeah I’m keeping an eye on this kid while haunting a magic turtle. 

Which brings me to the most insane part of the whole arc, the GODDAMN TURTLE. As we learned in Part 3 with Iggy, animals can be stand users and there is this turtle that is a stand user. And basically Giorno and gang use this turtle to escort the boss’ daughter while plotting to take down the boss. There are so many fights over this goddamn turtle. Turtle does what turtle wants on top of it because it’s a fucking turtle. I just. The turtle. Then fucking polnareff dies and somehow manages to possess the goddamn turtle for almost a third of the arc???? And decides to keep hanging out in the turtle after everything is said and done as a fucking ghost. Like ok, I shouldn’t be like this is the most whack shit that’s happened in JJBA because there was an honest to god alien in Part 4. 

Honestly this arc also had some great character arcs. I think that somehow each character manages to grow and confront their issues. Considering that Giorno is the son of Dio, he actually is a pretty good kid. Like I was going in expecting Dio Jr. Which thank god that was not the case because I would have been like Really? REALLY WE ARE DOING THIS AGAIN? I think my main complaint was Trish was pretty sexualized. She’s fucking 15, Araki, please let her have some more clothes. 

I am kinda bummed that there is no crossover between Josuke, Jolyne, and Giorno because I think it would be pretty funny. 

Part 6: Stone Ocean

I don’t know where the fuck to start with this one. First off, I am from Florida. I lived in Florida for 20 some years of my life. I grew up in Florida. The first fucking thing that this manga does is say that it’s set in/near PORT ST. LUCIE (PSL). I grew up in PSL. For the longest time, PSL was pretty much known for being a growhouse central because it’s a suburbia of maze like developments. Like I am pretty sure that Araki just took a dart and threw it at a map of Florida. BUT that being said, there are several marine biology/oceanography research institutions very close to PSL so I guess I could see it considering Jotaro is supposedly a professor of marine biology now (honestly I think he just fucks around with stand research instead).  Stone Ocean feels more like it’s set in Miami. It has that vibe. I have been to Miami one too many times and have nearly died in Miami (more than once). Stone Ocean is a literal fever dream for me. However, I enjoyed the hell out of it. It ranks up there with the one Sailor Moon arc where Luna has the crush on the astronaut’s boyfriend and there’s space shuttle shenanigans. 

Oh and did I mention that Stone Ocean is set in 2011. This is kinda an important point since let me put some context to why half of this is me screaming. The space shuttle program ended in 2011. I saw the last shuttle return (I wasn’t able to see the launch because it was fucking crazy to even get a seat at the place I’d go watch it in PSL). ANYWAYS, let’s get on to this beautiful disaster trainwreck of an arc. 

So first off, Jolyne is my favorite jojo. She’s a punk ass kid with a lot of issues. I was worried it would be endless fanservice, but actually stone ocean wasn’t too bad in that regard. Also part of Jolyne’s design features butterflies heavily so I’m like yeah this is my favorite (did I mention that I study butterflies, that I have lived, breathed, and eaten butterflies since I was 12? Ok i did eat a moth once but that’s another story). Also I thought Jolyne’s stand was really cleverly done (besides that I screamed that it had sunglasses). Jolyne gets framed for her shitty ex hitting a pedestrian which turns out to even be a whole set up. Fun fact, Jolyne’s shitty ex is from Palm Beach. The only thing you need to know about Palm Beach is that it houses Mar-A-Lago, yep that Mar-A-Lago. It’s full of rich white people. Which makes the whole boyfriend shit even funnier for me. Like I can already see how the fuck Jolyne and Romeo meet etc etc etc. Let’s just say the one high school the county over is notorious for the rich kids being absolute wankers (duis, drugs, the whole shebang) and I can fill in the blanks just from being from the area. 

So it’s time to put Jotaro on blast again because he is such a fucking dick. He literally abandons Jolyne for 14 years. Jolyne is convinced that he doesn’t want her and hates her. She has every right to be angry with Jotaro. This goes back to Part 3 when I said that Jotaro literally has no character development, Jotaro still hasn’t learned a single fucking thing. He still thinks he has to do everything himself so that the people he cares about won’t get hurt. Which is partly a result of Part 3, but also he had the chance to overcome that misconception in Part 4? But he doesn’t? He like asks Josuke for help once and basically takes on the bulk of the investigation himself so Josuke and pals don’t get hurt/further involved. Jolyne eventually realizes that the reason Jotaro abandoned her is that she and her mom won’t get caught up in the stand bullshit etc and forgives him. Which like I can understand why she does that. But it’s an incredibly shitty excuse to sever all ties with your kid and divorce your wife just because you’re trying to protect your family. Like ok, I have a rough relationship with my family and it can be really, really hard not to forgive them if they suddenly start being good to you despite the fact they have hurt you so deeply and you just know it’s a bad idea to get back close to them because it’s only going to end badly. Anyways, Jotaro is a fucking dickweed. 

The one thing that I really liked is how Jolyne’s determination brings other people closer to her. She’s a literal brick wall and just bulldozes through obstacles regardless of if it’s a good idea. She also will not abandon her friends. So Jolyne best jojo, fight me. 

I can not believe that all of Dio’s kids except Giorno are Florida Men. I was like Araki it does not take 10 hours to get from PSL to Cape Canaveral and then I was like wait Jolyne has to fight a Florida Man like every 10 minutes so it does kinda make sense. The whole part in Orlando was like a fever dream. I lived in Orlando. When the mickey mouse shit started, I was like ofc there’s going to be a fight with The Mouse. You cannot enter Orlando without making a sacrifice to The Mouse. 

I completely knew that the arc would climax at the Kennedy Space Center (KSC) just because it was set in 2011. I was fucking screaming the whole way through the final fight at the KSC because I have been there like idk 5 times or so. Can you believe that you used to not have to go through a gate to get in to tickets? That was before 9/11. Now it’s not like that. Anyways it was pretty great. 

I thought the ending was actually pretty satisfying considering the whole universe reset? 

Anyways Araki delivered the fucking florida man experience so completely that I was happy. He literally managed to write the arc like a Carl Hiaasen or Tom Dorsey novel on crack (those two are the best known Florida novelists who write mystery/crime novels about Florida). When the Part 6 anime comes out I am going to be so ready. 

Part 7: Steel Ball Run

Soooo this first arc of universe reset where everything is like do the Cupid Shuffle like 500 times while high as fuck. I think Part 7’s is weak compared to Part 4,5 and 6 in terms of writing BUT I was impressed by the originality of retelling of Part 1. I really liked the western bent to it. Also, I didn’t think that Araki could do completely new world building with stand origins without it being boring af. But he managed to make it really interesting and fucked up. I will put in a warning here: This arc isn’t great about race (not surprised at all), there is the magic cure for a disability trope (not a fan), and also sexual assault of a minor (really fucked up). 

Instead of the haman or however the fuck it’s spelled, Zeppeli uses a power called the spin which is his family’s secret ability. Zeppeli enters the Steel Ball Run which is a transcontinental horse race with a reward of half a million bucks. Johnny Joestar, a disgraced jockey sees Zeppeli use the spin and enters the race despite being paralyzed waist down just to figure out how the fuck Zeppeli uses it. For the most part, the depiction of disability is pretty good until you know the magic cure trope (offensive to disabled people, I can go more into depth with this in a different post). Zeppeli and Johnny start out as rivals but then become good friends and the writing is so good. However, every fucking cover drawing of the two together by Araki is very homoerotic. I don’t know if Araki actually knows how gay his drawings are? Like from Part 1 onwards, they are like...gay. Dio is there and I was like ok he gonna be vampire again but nope DIO FUCKING GETS DINOSAUR POWERS???? LIKE HE CAN TURN INTO A GODDAMN UTAHRAPTOR?????????????????????????????????????

Steel Ball Run has several layers of plot which are masterfully tied together :  the actual race, Zeppeli’s past, Johnny growing as a character, and the holy corpse. The holy corpse shit was right up my alley as being someone who loves crack christianity stuff. Like ok, at first I was like yeah it’s a saint and then I was like oh it’s the virgin mary and then Araki fucking hinted throughout the second half of the plot it’s JESUS???? Anyways that was some wack shit. President Valentine was a really good villain by the way -- completely captures Murica fuckery.  

I liked the addition of the fibonacci stuff/golden ratio in terms of maxing out stands/spin. 

My main issue with this arc besides race and disability fails is the handling of Lucy. She’s 14 and Araki oversexualized her. Like goddamn it she’s a FUCKING CHILD. This arc is probably the worst in terms of its treatment of women. I was really pissed at the fact that Araki had Lucy graphically assaulted and raped. So beware of that. That is part of the reason as much as I liked the originality of Part 7, I can’t really rank it high on the quality of JJBA parts. 

ANYWAYS ONTO PART 8

Part 8: JoJoLion

I am up to date as of August/September 2019 issue of the magazine JJBA is serialized in (I really want to say it’s Jump, but I’m probably wrong). This arc is really fascinating because it completely skips from the 1890s to the present day . There is the ties to Part 7 as that Johnny marries a Japanese woman whose family is a big part of this arc. It is set in Morioh like Part 4, but a Morioh completely shifted 180. It combines the story of a family curse, a man searching for his identity, and a conspiracy about these magical fucking fruit?

A college kid, Yasuho, pulls this dude out of the dirt at these weird formations in Morioh. The dude has no idea who he is and Yashuo names him Josuke. Note, the kanji for this Josuke are different than those for Josuke of Part 4. The Higashitika family that Yasuho is friends with takes Josuke in because he’s a stand user and he gets drawn into their shit while he tries to figure out who he is. 

The twist with Josuke’s identity and past was like fucking mind blowning. Like did not see that one coming that he’s the fusion of Yoshikage Kira (who in part 4 was the villian but in this one is the Joestar son of Holly? Not a murderer?) and Josefumi Kujo (character design resembles Part 4 Josuke). The thing with this arc is that it’s this weird combo of part 3 and part 4 with new content and characterizations. So it’s on one hand familiar and on the other hand completely unfamiliar. It continues with the corpse stuff, but I’m not completely sure how the corpse ties into the plot with the fruit and the new villains-- The rock people. It has to do with the equivalent exchange concept which is threaded throughout this whole arc. But like how exactly besides how Johnny died in Japan? Is the corpse still there in Japan? Araki TELL ME. 

Bonus: Little Jolyne Goes To Morioh Doujinshi. 

I found this Doujinshi on Batato and there wasn’t an author or artist attached but holy shit it is the CUTEST thing. It’s basically about Jolyne meeting Josuke because Jotaro needs a babysitter. It’s a very short one Doujinshi and the last part is hilarious. Anyways highly recommend reading this one because it’s really cute.