#but still she said that psychiatrists often don't mention the working diagnoses until they day hey let's do some tests

[autobahnmp3]

honestly not sure how therapy went today (therapy+psych appointment) i talked abt the diagnosis thing and asked for clarification and it seemed like she didn't wanna specify or maybe she will after she reads the records again

[nightinngales]

Hello there, sorry for the question and if you don't feel comfortable with it just ignore it. But the thing is you are the only blog that I follow that talked about adhd and I have read a lot about it on the internet and it seems that my friends kid has a lot of the symptoms but in my country it's not talked about it and there isn't any specialists for that as the kid has been to so many psychiatrists and doctors but they haven't even mention the possibility, all I have read about is from American sites, there isn't even any info about it in my native language. So my question is how do you actually cope with adhd, how can you suppress the symptoms and how it's actually treated?

ok strap in cause this will be long. under a read more because hella long 

Treatment Options: 

adhd is usually treated with stimulants, such as adderall or ritalin, which at least in the us, are controlled substances and you have to have a new script written every month in order to refill it. there are a few non-stimulant alternatives, like straterra, but i never noticed a difference while i was on them. 

How do you cope with symptoms? 

most people with adhd, even undiagnosed, end up self-medicating, usually by unconsciously seeking out stimulants that help them focus. lots of non-diagnosed people with adhd end up addicted to caffeine or cigarettes because they are both stimulants and can mimic the effects of medication (for a short time). however, it’s a game of diminishing returns. without moderation, your body eventually builds up a tolerance to substances like this, requiring more and more of it to produce the same effect. in medicine, this is called the “therapeutic level”: the amount of a drug needed in the bloodstream to actually produce an effect. 

why is this important? because, basically, even if you self-medicate with stimulants - you can only go so far. you can only drink so much coffee, or smoke so many cigarettes. eventually none of it will help, and merely keep you operating at a baseline, with detrimental effects should you drop off on usage (see: caffeine withdrawal). 

what’s more important, especially if you’re not able to be medicated, is learning how to cope and adapt to the symptoms of adhd. this is called compensating. for some this is automatic, as your brain adapts to the deficiencies. but, a lot of the time, it’s actually not possible to just make the symptoms go away. it’s a neurological deficit. no amount of coping skill will magically cure the condition - but you can learn to live with it. 

as far as coping techniques go... it depends on the severity of the symptoms, the age of the child, and the type of adhd they have (there’s actually several). what works for one person with adhd won’t work for everyone. my suggestion is this: 

identify the child’s “struggle” areas: what do they have the most problem with? for example: 

 emotional regulation - temper tantrums, massive mood swings, rejection sensitive dysphoria (look for MASSIVE downswings in mood when disciplined), overstimulation (do they get irritable when crowded or too much is going on?)

 hyperactivity - this can also present as anxiety in some kids. if your kid isn’t visibly hyper, check for other tells: fidgeting, nail biting, leg shaking, rocking, other symptoms of general anxiety - this can actually be a sign of hyperactivity, and the child finding other ways to burn off or cope with excess energy. 

focus, listening, “zoning out” - inattention, unable to stay focused, could also be hyperfixating. as a kid i had an issue where i could hyperfixate and totally tune out anyone who spoke to me. i genuinely would NOT hear things even if people were screaming at me. 

audio processing issues - if a kid doesn’t seem to be able to understand when spoken to, or lags behind (ex: asking “what?” and then, seconds later, answering appropriately as their brain processes what was said) 

learning difficulties - specifically check for issues with classes focusing on reading (such as their native language), and math in particular. dyslexia and dyscalculia are extremely common with adhd. get them tutoring or extended time on tests 

memory issues - does the child seem to say “i forgot” an inordinate amount? it could be a symptom of adhd. people with adhd often have issues with memory. 

Once you identify the problem areas, you can work on trying to help that child learn to cope with those issues. 

They have issues with emotional regulation or overstimulation? Give them a personal timeout button. Any time that kid needs a break and solo time, let them step away and isolate. It can help them manage their emotions and have a moment to process them in private where they won’t feel judged. It is important however that if you do this, don’t hold it against them. If they feel like you’re going to punish them for taking a time out to isolate, that just defeats the purpose. 

For hyperactivity, aggression, or impulsivity, find them an outlet to burn off energy. Get a punching bag, or some kind of active activity they enjoy. Even an active video game could help. 

Focus & listening, memory: Unfortunately there’s really no easy way to fix this. This is an issue with a frontal lobe deficiency. The ADHD person can try to come up with ways to manage it, but it will be an uphill battle. To-do lists and post-it notes and all of that type of stuff will not work. Luckily, they will likely get better at this as they get older. 

For learning difficulties, support them. Literally just support them. One of the major issues with ADHD is that it can present with RSD - rejection sensitive dysphoria. Any failure (perceived or actual) can send their mood absolutely plummeting into the shitter and kill their self-esteem and confidence. Don’t use blame-y language like “you didn’t try hard enough” or “If you could just pay attention...” etc. They’re trying. Trust me. They’re trying. And if they aren’t, it’s because they tried, and tried, and tried, and continued to fail with no encouragement, so they gave up. Encourage them. Support them. And prop them up when they do fail. Applaud their wins, no matter how small, and minimize their losses - make them realize a failure is not permanent, and they can always recover from it. This is super, super important for ADHD people with RSD because it’s so easy for them to give up on themselves. 

With RSD especially, be very careful of criticism, especially with kids. Their emotions are volatile, and RSD can lead to sudden, severe swings into suicidal ideation if it’s bad enough. If that child has RSD, they’re going to need a lot of support until they learn to manage their emotions better. 

With memory issues... Jury’s still out on that one. I’ve tried everything from calendars to post-it notes to alarms on my phone and still haven’t found one that actually works.  

And keep in mind: ADHD presentation not only differs by gender, but also tends to shift over time as they grow older. No one “grows” out of ADHD, they just get better at compensating for it. 

Girls tend to be less disruptive than boys. Less aggression, less acting out, but may still present with inattentiveness or other signs of hyperactivity (such as anxious tics/fidgeting). 

And lastly - ADHD tends to run in families. If one kid has it, it’s likely that another kid will have it, or one of the parents will have it, even if undiagnosed. I was diagnosed at 15. My mom was diagnosed 10 years later at 45. She’d spent her whole life compensating for a disorder she didn’t realize she had until she’d asked me one day what it felt like and realized she had a lot of the same issues I did. If possible, the parents should get tested as well. One or even both of them could be living with ADHD and not even know it. 

[zizi-the-blogger]

Hello everyone! I know my blog isn't very big but I'm hoping some people can buy some of my products (I run an art business - Artist's Hideaway) and I'm extremely strapped for cash. I've seen others do this too and of course you're going to need some background.

When I was a baby, I was given to my foster mother who i grew to calling mom because my biological mom most likely smoked heroin. Fast forward several years and I'm going between various foster homes. Eventually I ended up with this abusive bitch who's name I'm glad I don't remember. She blamed me for stuff her kids did and forced me to do things I didn't know how to do (like the laundry). When I got hurt she'd blame me and she was in a habit of yelling at and hitting me. Thankfully I got taken from that situation but it left a mark on me mentally and emotionally - I'm almost certain I have PTSD due to what I've experienced then and since, I'm just glad her kids were nice to me.

After that hell hole, I went to live with my foster mother's parents. My gramps was really nice to me and whatnot but my granny, especially after my Gramps died, was a bit scary to me. I was adopted by then around age nine but my Gramps died when I was twelve. My grandmother triggered my PTSD, said I was too smart to have anything like autism, said I couldn't possibly anxiety issues or ADHD (which I was actually diagnosed with) or any other mental issue. And yet she says I'm two years younger mentally than I should be so I don't have the right to leave and I'm also too naive which seems to contradict what she said. She also is extremely anti-LGBTQI as well as the rest of my immediate family and is completely against anything pagan. Your is an issue because I'm an asexual-demi/bi/something and I am a witch honoring Loki.

Continuing on about the mental and physical issues, I was both premature and part of my brain is missing because of that. This part handles basic motor control and might handle unconscious control like the heartbeat and breathing. Some days I can't breathe and more often than not I don't even realize until I actually get a deep breath even when I'm lightheaded or such and this may at least in part be due to allergies. I also have have heart complexities that I got surgery to fix but so far it's barely fixed. My heart issues aren't as bad as they used to be but they're still pretty bad. In addition, I have bouts of depression (thankfully I have yet to want to kill myself but I have hurt myself and even said 'if I die I die') and, as mentioned, I've been diagnosed with ADHD. I also have several signs of high-functioning autism but that could also be partially caused by the missing piece of brain. I've tried to see a psychiatrist before but I had to hide that from my grandmother and ended up missing an appointment too many and the wouldn't take me on again.

In almost exactly a month I'm goin to kissing my state insurance (I'm turning 21) and will need to start paying for it myself. Due to expenses, I'm going to forgo the eye insurance and hope I don't need glasses. However, I cannot forgo the regular insurance and thus I hope I can afford that. I also have car insurance that happens to be about 1,000 a month due to my driving record (when I first started driving I wasn't a good driver but I haven't had an antenna in about six months thankfully).

About two and a half years ago I managed to escape her by thing away with a boy but I was living in my car for about two years. Then start happened and I had to have the police called and now we're apart. He still emails me time to time but I'm ignoring the emails. Right now I'm staying with the friend who called the police for me but there's an issue. I'm illegally staying here and need to get a place ASAP. Thankfully my caseworker is trying to get my into one but it may be awhile.

However, that isn't what I need help with. About six or so months ago I was working at Amazon but it only lasted a few weeks. During work, my ankle was her so I went to an LNI clinic. Unfortunately for me, the doctor didn't sign the paperwork so when Amazon fired me after I requested resignation paperwork, I couldn't do anything. They also said they fired me for taking too much time off when I was told by my supervisors to take that time off. Because of this I'm running instacart and barely making jack and my ankle probably hasn't healed properly. On top of that no one is hiring me except instacart and I can't wear a mask so I can't work instacart very much anyway.

I'm currently trying to go back to school, this time for an IT degree, but my laptop is shit so I need to save up about $600 for a tablet-computer (I'm looking at the Samsung S10). This device would be for personal and business use because the school is sending me a laptop for schoolwork but I need one just for myself as well. I also have a phone bill each month between 60 and 90 dollars (I think it's ninety but I'm not sure). I was hoping to make this money by black Friday but I think I can the way instacart and my bills are and of course with instacart I'm needing to fill up my tank too and I'm pretty sure my car is barely holding itself together.

With my business, it's $25/hr (half of what most people charge) and some items I can finish pretty quickly. However if you buy premade, it's approximately 10% of what it would be if it was custom ordered. I have a Facebook and an Instagram for my business as well which I will link below. Instagram is my main portfolio right now as I cannot afford anything.

$600 would be exactly one day of paid hourly work at my price but if possible I'd like to have some extra money as well so I can handle gas and other things like my phone bill (3.6 hours of work) and food (my food card keeps running out each month)

Also, if you want stock photos I can do that. $3 a photo or $10 for 5. This one would be The 'Perfect Print Photography' business. If you live in west Washington state, I can travel to you or meet you at a location of your choosing. Prices are on my Facebook page.

I also do rune readings and tarots. The tarots usually only take a few minutes each so those are flat at $10 but every two readings you'll get $5 off (1 $10; 2 $15; 3 $25; 4 $30; etc...) but my rune readings vary. Name reading (interpreting the meaning of your name though runes) is $5 but for a name card (shown below) it's $10 total, 3-stone is $10, 5 stone is $15, 9 stone is $20 and full-stone (all 24) is $30. The details on each of these is down below in the images.

If you're interested in the art, please contact me at the.artists.hideaway@gmail.com

If you're interested in my photography, please contact me at

perfect.print.photography@gmail.com

If you're interested in my divintation, please contact me at

zizi0taylor@gmail.com

You can also TEXT me at 425-366-9047 or reach me through my Facebook.

https://www.instagram.com/artists_hideaway/

https://www.instagram.com/perfect_print_photography/

[the--sad--hatter]

It's ok if you don't want to answer this but I was wondering what you take meds for? I know you have said you have mental health problems and that you take antipsychotics but I wanted to ask why. Im not trying to be rude or nosey, it's just that I look up to you quite a lot and i have problems as well. Finding out you had to take tablets made me feel a bit better about taking my own. I always felt kind of ashamed about having to take antideppresants but not so much now I know you take stuff too.

I don’t mind answering this at all, especially if someone can relate to it. This is probably going to be a hell of a wordy response though, and may be triggering for some people to read, so proceed with caution guys. 

The story of my mental health is a really long one, and goes back quite far. It goes back to when I was a fetus actually. 

My mother was a drug addict, who used while she was pregnant with me (my dad was unaware of this), and as a result I was born with minor ‘defects’. My lungs didn’t form properly, and a part of my stomach tubing is malformed (We’ll come back to that). During labour, I tore the womb on my way out and nearly killed my mother. 

The trauma of that, as well as her own mental health and addiction issues made it hard for her to bond with me. It’s worth noting that my mum was 19 when I was born, but my dad was 32. They were married about a month before my birth and split up three days later. 

They shared custody for the first year of my life until something went down, but I’m not sure what, and my father took full custody. 

He was a good dad in his defence. He loved me, and did anything he could to keep me safe and happy. But when I was 18 months old, he met another woman and eventually married her. 

My stepmother didn’t want me as a part of her family, but put on a good show for my dad and the rest of the world. Behind closed doors though, she physically and mentally tortured me. The stuff she did to me was vile and it left me quite damaged. 

Because of the stomach deformity, I am prone to vomiting. I was also starved on a regular basis by my stepmother, which left me quite malnourished. I was deathly afraid of her, so when I was sick I didn’t tell anyone because I was afraid of being punished for it. Eventually, I was found out, and my stepmother managed to convince people the vomiting was why I was so skinny. I don’t have a fucking clue how it was never mentioned that I have a hiatus hernia and that’s why I was sick, it was in my medical notes, and I found out when I was 13. 

This kind of stuff continued throughout my childhood. My stepsister had a son when I was 9, and she didn’t really want him, so I had to take care of him. My grandfather died and my granny was very ill, so our living room was turned into a bedroom for her. I nursed her, raised a baby (who called me mum the first time he ever spoke) and all the while I was beaten, starved and tortured. I couldn’t handle it and tried to kill myself when I was 11. 

Because of the suicide attempt, I was put into a childrens home. The abuse could never be proved because the only witness was my stepsister, and she had often joined in so she wasn’t inclined to back me up. My dad decided that he wanted to take his wifes side, and not mine. 

Being in care was not an easy thing, and there was other kinds of abuse to be suffered. Eventually, I snapped. I became incredibly violent, to the point where I can’t excuse the things I did. I would snap, and the people I hurt weren’t always the people trying to hurt me. I hurt innocent people. 

As is the norm, at 16 I was tossed out. I lived in hostels for a while until I managed to get an apartment/flat, but it was in a small town quite a way from the city. I was unable to get help for my mental health, and I declined rapidly. 

That was when i started blacking out. Sometimes it would only be for a few minutes, sometimes it would be for longer. The longest was three days, three days I lost. I once came back to myself while holding a knife to my own chest. I often woke up covered in blood, wounded or miles away from my home. 

That was when I got put in a psychiatric ward where I ended up for a year. 

After being released, I moved 600 miles away to be close to my boyfriend, because he loved me. It was an idiotic thing to do of course, and I quickly learned that once I was there. 

Then my dad had a breakdown, and in the process reached out to me. He ended up on the same ward I had been on and it made him realise the depth of his mistakes. He admitted he knew what had happened to me as a child and he felt guilty. I forgave him, because I’ve fucked up enough in my life to not hold it against someone who truly wants forgiveness. 

My dad got better and moved away from my childhood home, and got a divorce. When he found out I was in an abusive relationship, he drove to England and got me and brought me to live with him. 

I live alone now, and it’s been years since all this happened. But the damage is done, and the wounds aren’t bleeding anymore but they are scarred. There’s much more to it, so much more. There’s the years of self-harming, the singular traumatic events, the betrayals, but I’ve told you the bare bones of my story. 

I could tell you all my diagnoses, list all the damn acronyms, but it wouldn’t explain anything. I struggle to say present in the world, and not disassociate. I have severe anxiety, depression, sleeping problems, paranoia... It’s not exactly shocking.  

What I can tell you is this. I saw my first psychiatrist when I was five years old. I have been seeing them since. I have been to every kind of therapy, taken so many different drugs. It doesn’t always help. But I knew a girl, call her Emily. She was a couple of years older than me, and so much worse. The stuff she had been through made my childhood look idyllic. I had to take her to hospital more than once, I had to talk her off the ledge, pin her to the ground to stop her hurting herself when “they” were trying to get her. 

Emily has a husband and a daughter now. She posted photos on Facebook a couple of weeks ago of her trip to London Comic-Con, her little girl dressed up as Belle. Emily got better. Emily fought for it, she made it, she won and she keeps winning. 

This battle I’ve been fighting my whole life, it IS winnable. 

Take your meds anon, and don’t be ashamed of it. We all have our demons, and they aren’t comparable. We all have our struggles, we all have our own battles. Don’t waste time or energy feeling bad for needing to take a pill to help you fight your fight. If you have a vitamin deficiency, you take vitamins, and if your brain doesn’t produce quite enough serotonin, you take an antidepressant. 

Strength, true strength, is in admitting you need help, be if from a therapist, a pill or a friend. There’s not a single person in the history of humanity who didn’t struggle with something at some point. We are not infallible, we are not unbreakable. Our beauty comes from the way we piece ourselves back together. I’m still working on that part, and I can’t wait to see what I’ll be when I’m finished. The excitement for what i can one day be is far more important than any shame I might feel from needing to take some medication to help me get there. 

Like I said, we all have our battles, and in a battle, you need a weapon. Think of the medication like a blade, stabbing at the demons in your head, and by taking the pills, you’re picking up the sword. 

Don’t be ashamed. Be brave, be beautiful and fight. You’ve got this, and I can’t wait to see what you become one day. 

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