#but still definitely not as much as rocks
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paniniani Ā· 2 days ago
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cooking with fire: katsuki bakugo x reader
synopsis: bakugo canā€™t deal with your subpar cooking abilities and decides to ā€œhelpā€
warnings: language (obviously), spice, teasing, tiny knife injury
"you really hate celery that fuckin much??" bakugo yelled, a look of horror on his face as he stomped into the kitchen. he just wanted to make a cup of tea in peace, but when he saw you mutilating these poor vegetables, he had to step in.
rolling your eyes, you spit out a response: "can you be a little more annoying? since everyone's been getting sick, i'm making soup. im doing a nice thing. do you know what a nice thing is? it's when people-"
"SHUT UP." he interrupted, scowling at you as he braced his elbows on the kitchen counter, leaning over to inspect your poor cutting job. you certainly didn't mind the view as you continued chopping, eyes raking over his muscular forear-
"SHIT" you cried, as the knife nicked your pointer finger, leaving a tiny yet slightly painful scratch. great. first you're terrible at cooking, then you cut your finger because you're thirsting over the class' biggest asshole. for a brief moment, a flicker of concern crossed his face, quickly replaced by his trademark smug smirk.
"need a bandaid or somethin? didn't take you as someone to be so.. easily distracted." turning your attention away from your finger, you raised your chin to meet his gaze, sparking with pride and... something you couldn't quite pin down.
"what's your problem anyway? can't you just leave me alone?" you replied, trying not to flush at the eye contact.
"i'll leave you alone when you stop fucking butchering these vegetables!" as his eyebrows drew together, you saw the same unfamiliar expression flash across his face before he closed his eyes and sighed with annoyance. picking up the knife again, you began chopping. you were focusing so hard on the celery that you didn't notice his strangely quiet steps, moving closer and closer until his large hand settled over yours on the knife, standing behind you to watch your movements.
your breath hitched at the uncharacteristically gentle contact, causing your mind to race as you suddenly felt hot, burning hot, all over your body.
"somethin the matter? what happened to all that shit you were talkin? soup's not gonna make itself." you could practically hear the smirk in his face as you stood stone-still, his thumb having the nerve to draw tiny, delicate circles over your own. reaching his other arm around you, he grabbed a new piece of celery and began to chop, still keeping your hand underneath his.
his skilled hands made quick work of the vegetables, finishing the task in just a few seconds. you would never forgive your brain for the nasty thoughts you were having of what else he could do with those han-
"aw come on, don't go all shy on me now..." he quietly spoke into your ear, flustering you further if it were possible. this wasn't fair. you didn't know what the fuck had come over him, but two could play at this game, no matter how incredibly turned on you were.
"you gonna help me with some more or just stand there? still gotta chop up these carrots.." you looked back at him with heavy lids, letting your head tilt to the side, almost grazing his shoulder. internally, you giggled as it was his turn to flush deep red. his face was painted with that same odd expression, finally realizing that it was-
"don't give a fuck about these damn carrots" he murmured, staring down at you. he was whipped, and he knew it. grabbing the knife and your hand again, he grabbed a few carrots, leaning his strong chest against your back.
"gotta see better" he spat out, but you knew he was about to give in. in a moment of desperation, you arched your back, pressing your ass against him. looking up at him again through lust-covered eyes, you choked out a few words:
"need.. your help.. bakugo."
screwing his eyes shut, he knew he was done for- shit. he was hard as a fucking rock. you could definitely tell too. grinding against you, he bit back a groan. you felt so fucking good.. fuck, he needed you so bad. suddenly, you felt strong hands grabbing your waist and spinning you around to face him.
shit. this was much easier when you weren't having to look at him. crimson eyes staring at your lips, you gulped and looked up at him with wide pleading eyes. knowing this would push him over the edge, you leaned in, your lips magnetic towards his own. at the last instant, you moved, pressing gentle kisses across his jawline, watching his throat struggle to keep his pretty sounds in. kissing and gently sucking down his neck, he finally gave in. opening his mouth, he managed a few mumbled words between quiet groans.
"itskatsuki.please."
his voice cracked with desire, begging, pleading you to continue. kneeling down, you trailed kisses across his rapidly rising and falling chest, watching his abs twitch as you continued downward to his v-line. slipping a finger in his waistband, causing a whine, you knew you had him. why not make this a little more fun? you looked up at him with a sweet smile, speaking in a low, sultry tone.
"okay. katsuki..." you drew his name out with a long groan, watching him look at you pleadingly. "we still gotta chop the carrots".
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strawberrykidneystone Ā· 1 day ago
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mechanic sevika
ty for requesting @sunflowerwinds ILY
a/n: i only know basics about cars so here's something that actually happened to my shit ass car LMAO
INSPIRED BY THIS
while you were pulling out of the parking lot from your weekly errands, you heard some sputtering from your car
it freaked you out a little bit, but then it went away so you ignored it for now
then the battery icon popped up
pulling into an auto parts shop, you had the cashier check your battery only to see coolant splashed all over the place
he said that your battery was fine, but your serpentine belt had snapped
whatever that meant
you felt nauseous, worried about how much this was going to cost
not to mention that most mechanics were shutting down for the night
the guy offered to take you home in his car in a flirty way, which was disgusting since he was well into his 60s, MAYBE 70s and ugly as fuck
as you backed away from him and gripped your car door handle, she appeared
like your knight in a shining jumpsuit
"we already chatted earlier, she's coming over to my shop to get her car fixed, she doesn't need a ride," she said firmly, wrapping an arm around your shoulders as she walked up from behind you
she had heard everything in the store and the story you rambled out, figuring out the problem pretty quickly
she also knew the owner was a bit of a creep
the owner quickly nodded and scurried back inside with his equipment
you deflated with a sigh of relief, but still needed your goddamn car fixed
"thanks, i definitely didn't want to get in a car with him..."
"no problem sweetheart, and i was serious about taking your car in. i got my truck right here and my shop is just up the street." she offered and respectfully took her arm off your shoulders, the two fo you now facing each other
your eyes widened as you shook your head and started stuttering, "oh i couldn't its probably past your working hours and i don't want to be an inconvenience-"
she chuckled and held up a hand to stop your rambles, "it's fine doll. i was planning on working late anyways and your belt's an easy fix, youā€™ll be in and out in half an hour."
you thought it over in your head and accepted her offer, grabbing your essentials out of your car before she hooked yours up to her bright red truck
she opened the passenger door for you and offered her hand, which you happily took as you climbed up the tall truck
she had a pair of fuzzy dice hanging over the central mirror and the truck had a smell of stale cigarettes and weed despite the (probably old) air freshener hanging in the middle of the dice
the seat covers were leopard printed and faded, but added to the overall charm of the car
the two of you sat in a semi-awkward silence as the radio played old divorce dad rock
as sevika backed up your car into the garage with her arm reaching around the back of your seat, you had to ignore the blush that was creeping up you cheeks
you hopped out of her truck as she unhooked your car, parking hers out into the parking lot
pacing in the lobby and glancing at the window to the garage to see her working on your car, wiping her forehead with the back of her hand
if you werenā€™t so stressed about your car you wouldā€™ve taken time to appreciate how hot she looked more
sevika walked into the lobby with a reassuring smile once she was done and wiped her hands off with a grimy towel, ā€œshould be good as new sweetheart.ā€
she grabbed a post-it note off of her desk and scribbed her number down onto it, holding it out to you across the counter after you paid for the part, ā€œcall me if you have any other problems with your car.ā€
ā€œcould i call you just because i want to,ā€ you blurted out before you could even process what you were saying, a deep flush covering your cheeks
sevika raised her eyebrows and smirked, rubbing her chin with a crooked finger, ā€œ ā€˜course doll, iā€™d love that.ā€
you aimlessly nodded and smiled, bumping into the doorframe on your way out to your newly fixed car
driving home, you couldnā€™t help but hope that you broke down on the side of the road
a/n: WHO WANTS A FUCKED ON HER TRUCK AFTER HOURS FICā€¼ļøā€¼ļøā€¼ļø
taglist: @maneskinwh0re @archangeldyke-all @fandoms-will-be-the-death-of-me @sevikasfan @lez-zuha @comfortripley @sunflowerwinds
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spiderfunkz Ā· 1 day ago
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SEND YOU MY LOVE ON A WIRE!
pairings. cho hyun-ju x f!reader
cw. fluff, reader is alternative and plays the bass, no games au.
author's note: guys i don't know anything about instruments okayšŸ’”šŸ’” i'm not sure if i did justice for this one, my knowledge for the subculture is very limited but i tried my best.
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wandering through the streets of seoul late at night wasn't exactly the plan for cho hyun-ju.
after a long day at work, all she wanted to do was to eat at her favorite restaurant. she could already imagine sipping on the warm hearty soup. unfortunately though, the place was closed for the rest of the week.
now she has found herself staring into the window of a local pub. the music playing gave her a sense of nostalgia and starstruck-ness. the tunes brought a small wave of relief to hyun-ju, no matter how loud it was, it felt empowering.
a band was putting on a show there. hyun-ju was mesmerized by the melody, the genuine emotions it stirred, and also the cute bassist.
but to her luck the band stopped playing rather abruptly.
a rush of muttering and soon shouting came along with it. the band left the pub silently, walking towards the old van parked nearby.
the bassist followed behind them.
this could be the time to start a conversation with her, hyun-ju thinks, she could come up with many topics. it has been a long day, some small talk with a girl couldn't hurt, right?
"excuse me?" her hands awkwardly fidgeted, she wonders if you were even in the mood to talk. her worries were soon brushed off as she was met with a friendly smile.
"hi!" the light reflected on you, hyun-ju noticed your makeup. it looks flawless, everything seemed to compliment your features very well.
"could i help you with something?" your voice was just as angelic as the singerā€” well, you were in a band, that talent must've lingered for all the members.
hyun-ju's mouth began talking faster than her head could comprehend it, "is it okay if i ask why you stopped playing in there?"
you laugh, "oh yeah, i guess the guy, owner, whatever- was expecting we play something.. softer? i don't know. i'm assuming he didn't read the list of songs we were gonna play."
hyun-ju nods, "i thought it was really nice."
"the guy thought otherwise," you shrug.
"you played very well there, i only heard a bit of it. but you looked very skilled." hyun-ju's voice made it sound like it was more of a statement. she was genuinely in awe of your talent.
"i'm just the bassist, credits should be given to the guitarist or singer if anything."
"but the bass ties it together, no? it controls the rhythm and pace, i think it enhances the tune of the song you were playing," hyun-ju smiles, she hopes she doesn't sound too sheepish or weird, "you brought a nice sense of energy and aura."
her words definitely struck a chord with you.
"what's your name, pretty?" your words caught the woman off guard, "oh, hyun-ju, cho hyun-ju."
"well, hyun-ju, do you want to grab a drink with me?"
"what about your band?" she gestures to the van that has been waiting for you this entire time, "i can handle it. they won't mind too much, besides, we're not gonna play anything else tonight."
hyun-ju nods, excited.
"okay then, i know a spot."
you motion to the van to leave without you, the bass still strapped on your back. hyun-ju's eyes focused on you before giving a small wave to the van driving away.
hyun-ju was wrong. wandering the streets of seoul late at night was the perfect plan. to meet someone as talented and gorgeous as you, she was able to ease off for the night. forgetting all the worries that laced her thoughts earlier today.
the night felt more lively than ever. you got to tell her many things, such as; your love for alternative rock, how you eventually learned the bass, how you met your friends slash bandmates, and how you discovered yourself through the art of music. you got to share your views and perspectives, your makeup routine, your favorite places to play atā€” hyun-ju listened to every single word that came out of you.
you noticed it. "say, hyun-ju, would you like to go out sometime? grab another drink maybe, or go to a place of your choice?"
"i would love to."
"okay then," you grab a piece of paper and pen hidden in your pocket, you had this planned all along, did you?
"here, give me a call, pretty."
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thewertsearch Ā· 15 hours ago
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Ask Comp 9/1
Anonymous asked: has sally been introduced to cursed tavros yet?
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[ cursed tavros jumpscare :D ]
Cursed indeed - but mind you, I don't think I could do much better. My handcraft skills are nonexistent!
Anonymous asked: ol tavvy is down with the clown ;o) Anonymous asked: Please, if you will, imagine if when Vriska kissed Tavros, he told her that he was already dating Gamzee.
Heh. I really do think Gamzee x Tavros could have worked out, at least until Gamzee lost his shit. Hell, even if Gamzee did lose his shit, he'd probably still be less of a threat to Tavros than Vriska was.
Anonymous asked: Did you notice Gamzee referenced Earth in his rap? ("6 trillion hemos all up on one rock bleeding as equals") How do you think he learned about it? Some weird pre-game precognition or just his stoned mind being accidentally right?
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This isn't necessarily a reference to Earth - but it wouldn't surprise me if it was, because Gamzee's cult seems fully aware of the existence of Earth.
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The 'paradise planet' referenced in Gamzee's intro is stated to not exist yet, which is exactly how the narration refereed to Earth in Hivebent's intro. I believe that the 'rowdy minstrels' he's talking about are literally ICP, although he clearly isn't aware of that fact.
@wizardlyghost asked:
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A sentiment shared by Eggman, every Space Player, and the villain of Muppets Most Wanted.
Anonymous asked: Now that you've passed where fedorafreak's gray, serviceable hand-held computing device's battery has died, you might appreciate the following short piece of fan art: www tumblr com/vastderp-placeholder/7741061457/savior-of-the-texting-world-rise-up
The fucking implication that the phone is the Player in this scenario is obliterating me.
Also, its God Tier form has wings. Was it a troll all along, or are wings a symbol of divine apotheosis in phone culture, too?
@clueless-rarito asked: Heeey paranatural reference! Hell yeah!
Is anyone else totally stoked to see Eightfold again? I know I am!
Anonymous asked: bilious sick šŸ˜­
English's trick made our Bilious sick. :(
Anonymous asked: One of, if not my absolute favorite, quotes/moments in Homestuck is Karkatā€™s speech to Jade about his failed frog breeding here. Just such a wonderfully tragic moment that stuck with me since the first time I read it.
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In a comic chock-full of great lines, that last one might just be the best so far. This was one of the last scenes before Act 5's true finale, and it was an excellent pick.
@drakethedeep asked: One theory I've heard about the Denizen's Choice that tend to headcanon, Is that the choice is to be happy/free or to matter. That much as how God-tiers only grants survival by never having an impact, the denizens have thier playes coose between seeking their happiness and survival, or to struggle to achieve things that while objevtivly monumental, might not be worth the sacrifices needed to achieve it. I like this theory because of how it themes to fit the themes of Sburb.
I really like the space you're playing in, but I'm not so sure if all the Choices we've seen would necessarily fit this interpretation. After all, Davesprite implicitly chose the 'survival' option when he first met Hephaestus, and he's not exactly a happy camper. He didn't end up particularly free, either, since he was almost immediately bound to a Sprite, and later to the Battlefield.
I guess you could say he 'mattered', because he is he reason the Alpha Timeline exists the way it does - but, technically, everyone's actions contribute to the Alpha Timeline being the way it is. I definitely think there's something to this theory.
Anonymous asked: Without the Door to actually enter the universe, all you've done is make a really big frog.
I guess, when you think about it, there's not really anything they can do with their universe without that door. I suppose they could just fly towards their frog and hope for the best, but somehow, I don't think that'll achieve much.
@morganwick asked: Of course, even though he wasn't fooled by Gamzee using Terezi's "voice", Karkat still showed up on the roof anyway. Perhaps he decided he couldn't take the risk that Terezi was actually there and Gamzee might catch her unawares.
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Gamzee's been having a lot of fun 'impersonating' Terezi lately. Just like before, I don't think he ever intended to fool Karkat with his transparent ruse - he just wanted to unsettle the guy. It worked.
@morganwick asked: If Typheus is the mailman, does that make him PM's favorite Denizen?
Maybe it makes him the head of her mail service!
We never saw any other mail Carapacians, and I kind of love the idea that they were operating out of a Denizen's Palace the whole time.
@bladekindeyewear asked: You said: "Mind you, I donā€™t know if itā€™s necessarily always a good or heroic thing to allow a Sburb Player full agency over their actions, nor is it necessarily a bad thing to restrict them, in certain cases." Oh I'm completely with you there. In fact, you might DEFINE Heroism as denying agency to those who would do ill, in part. This would make both "Heroic" and "Just" deaths result from trying to stamp your own intentions upon reality, halted by others. Neutrality would be ineffectual.
That's certainly part of heroism - but to me, it's not even close to all of it. A firefighter, for example, is heroic in ways which don't involve another person, as their only real 'opponent' is nature itself.
I personally define heroism as the will to do good, in situations where doing good requires bravery. 'Good', of course, is a fairly slippery concept, though, so that definition is just as ambiguous as any other.
Anonymous asked: Doctor Who anon here. Doctor Who has no canon for purely practical reasons. It's so massive - there's the show, but there's also the Big Finish audio dramas, the DW magazine comics, the Radio Times comics, the IDW comics, the Titan comics, the Virgin novels and short stories, the BBC novels and short stories. And no one owns all of it. The BBC don't even own the daleks or K9. And each piece of media will freely contradict others. No one has the right to decide what's canon, so they just don't. It's also because the people running Doctor Who the show have a deep respect for the extended media. In the 90s, it was the non-BBC licensed, fan-led projects which kept DW alive. Russell T. Davies, first showrunner of the modern era, wrote Virgin novels, so did Mark Gatiss. Nick Briggs, modern voice of the daleks, is the head of Big Finish. So they didn't want to decanonise that stuff, but they also don't want to be beholden to it when writing their own stories. So the fanbase tends to operate on tiers of canon. Basically something can be assumed to still be part of the show's continiuity until the show contradicts it. Big Finish would generally be considered the next highest "tier" of canon. The Doctor Who magazine comics probably wouldn't contradict the show, but the show could contradict them any time. The old books and comics are dubious. But that's all just fan categorisation. Officially, nothing has been deemed canon or not. In fact, rather amusingly, the only thing that has been explicitly deemed "canon" by the BBC is the Doctor Who: Battles in Time card game. That's officially canon. Nothing else. Not even the show.
I think I've heard of 'canon tiers' before, in the context of the Star Wars fandom. I think it's a good way to delineate how 'true' a given event is considered to be, especially in a large, complex shared universe - but at the same time, being consciously aware of these tiers might hurt your investment a little.
You'll never be able to escape the fact that your favourite stories or characters are effectively fanfiction, at least from the perspective of higher tiers. They have no influence whatsoever over the more ''real'' part of the story, unless they're promoted its tier some day.
I do like the idea that all the other Doctor Who stories are fanfiction of the card game, though. That's definitely going to be my canon, from now on.
@morganwick asked: Well, back in Act 4 you said that John and Dave would make S-Tier if and when "John [threw] aside his passivity to do something heroic, andā€¦Dave [would] finally drop that poker face and do something sincere", which is why I pegged the suicide mission conversation as when Dave might make the jump.
I think, on reflection, it's almost always a heartwarming event that catapults a character into S-Tier.
In my opinion, that's one of the most impressive feelings that a work of fiction can inspire in you, mostly because it's really hard to get you invested enough for it to hit properly. Homestuck's pulled it off an extremely impressive number of times already, and we're only halfway finished!
Anonymous asked: It is so fucking awesome to see a new reader in the year of our lord 2024 2025 who's actually like. Engaging with the themes of the story. Lotta people just see it for the memes or the "totally random" plot but some of the shit you're reading into what's happening is like. Eerily similar to actual Hussie commentary. Gold star for reading comprehension, you do not piss on the poor Anonymous asked: Your homestuck liveblogs are lovely and insightful and make me remember a lot of details of the comic that have been lost to time. You will comment on something and I'll go "oh huh homestuck was better than I remember it being." Thank you <3 @honestlyvan asked: Truly your liveblog is the best kind of re-experiencing the experience. I'm surprised at how much your thoughts and reads parallel mine, it's kind of fun to see someone else's deductions go along the same routes. I can't wait for you to get to the Truly Horseshit portions of the plot (and I say this lovingly, I think you're in a great position to give us a real raw read on them without having to deal with the various Mega and Gigapauses) Also -- you keep pointing out a shitton of foreshadowing I didn't catch until my second readthrough. I can't wait for you to get to the bits where it applies and be like "son of a bitch", I think where I'm in the reading of your backlog and where you're in the reading of the comic you've passed at least one of those bits already :D @worldweary-walker asked: The liveblog is so cool. It's a lot of fun seeing you put things together, and the posts where you come up with three completely right conclusions and two wrong ones always amaze me. Impressive work!
Thank you so much! I know I say this a lot, but a lot of these sentiments are exactly why I like reading liveblogs myself. I'm just really glad I can do that for others.
I can totally understand why someone would just read Homestuck for the memes. I wouldn't have been nearly as analytical if I'd read it as a schoolgirl, and a lot of the 2010s fandom were even younger than that!
@divineerdrick asked: Now we have multiple explanations for what is wrong with the kid's session. Vriska has made herself responsible for Jack's rise to power, Karkat believes he gave Bilious Slick cancer, and Gamzee created the harlequin doll that would torment John and prompt Jack's rage-fueled act of rebellion. You've already suspected that Doc Scratch probably has multiple plans in play at once, and we can see that here. It seems he insured, through multiple causes, the kid's universe has always been doomed. Gamzee, as usual, seems to be the wild card. But he's acting out during a crisis of faith, a faith tied to Alternia's twisted social structure, which Scratch seems to have had a hand in. So despite how random Gamzee's actions appear to be, it's possible Scratch managed to seed even this seemingly unpredictable action.
I think Scratch probably did 90% of the work in making Gamzee go ballistic, from multiple directions at once. Looking back, it's shocking just how much of the comic was Scratch's doing.
'Caused' is a loaded phrase in Paradox Space, but what's happening is definitely what he planned.
Anonymous asked: It kind of seems like Rage as an aspect is evil, no? Do you think an aspect can carry an inherent moral weight? If not, what are the neutral meanings of aspects that seem to, and if so, how do you feel about it?
Personally, I doubt that any of the Aspects have a moral alignment - not even the scary-sounding ones. After all, you can Rage against tyranny, or bring Doom to a corrupt institution. Yeah, Gamzee is using Rage for evil, but his perception-shielding could just as easily be used to hide an innocent bystander from an aggressive Underling.
I think that more or less any ability can be used for both good or evil. The only real exception would be a power that's deliberately designed to be irreparably, comically evil. 'The ability to torture everyone for all eternity' would be one of those powers, but Homestuck's Aspect abilities would not.
@worldweary-walker asked: have you read Kill Six Billion Demons?
I have not! It's on my long and constantly growing list, which means I'll get to it between now and, uh, 2096.
Anonymous asked: re: the ancestors' story. WHAT IF WE ALL JUST CRIED like. the sheer transition from inane antics to the. that @corporalotherbear asked: There's a very popular fanmade version of the sufferer's final sermon and following vast expletive, voiced by a man that would go on to be the english voice actor of Izuku Midoriya. I can't add links to asks but if it's spoiler-friendly then your vetter can probably send you "The sufferer's last sermon"
Oh, I kind of love this interpretation. It really sells just how unwinnable the Sufferer's rebellion truly was.
@wolygan asked: I forgot how she is so happy when she is running away. This Girl is still able to believe that good is coming. Except Lord English won't let that happen, no matter what. @wickedsick asked:
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That was possibly the fastest you have ever been proven wrong about something
That poor girl. She suffered just as much as the Signless did, but she'll only be known to Alternia as a monster - and unlike Troll Jesus, no one will ever mourn the Handmaid.
Anonymous asked: the sufferer cult is definitely independent of the juggalos! the use of the word sectarian to describe the war waged against the signless's beliefs is not a coincidence, imo. (we also see that highblood is most often used to specifically describe purplebloods). they're just two different religious organizations. given that the grand highblood was a juggalo man/subjuggulator and occupied significant power it seems to suggest that clown religion was a Big Thing among the purplebloods, which would not truck with the signless' cult being so small and secretive. there's one theory that part of the reason the neophyte was sent on mindfang's case was bc the GHB (given that mindfang mentions the neophyte was sent by subjuggulators specifically) knew she was a secret sufferite and wanted to get rid of her. mindfang does talk about how it seemed like they were giving up on her case entirely by sending just one neophyte (granted this is partially bc she underestimated her). it would track that while they definitely wanted to get rid of mindfang, they also were fine with the neophyte dying. this also follows with the fact that after mindfang gets out of that trial, she manages to persist without being caught right up until her death at the hands of the summoner. were they happy that the neophyte got killed, enough to stop putting much effort into mindfang's capture?
I think the Highbloods probably did set Redglare up. I speculated that it was possible when we first heard about her death, and that was before we knew she was a Signless cultist.
Also: lmao, do you remember when Hussie told us that the Juggalo Cult was 'obscure'? That's starting to feel like something that was quietly retconned offscreen.
@clueless-rarito asked: In case you like to know, "Dolorosa" is meant to evoke the spanish word "Doloroso" meaning painful but changing the O for an A turn it feminine.
Dolorosa; in other words, the woman in pain.
Fucking hell, she deserved so much better. It's amazing how much bleaker the Ancestors' lives were, compared to their descendants. Modern Alternia is bad enough as it is!
@lon-kasi asked: Fanwork recommendation: The same guy who did the EoA5 reanimation just did Intermission 2 as well. Like, less than six hours before I sent this ask. It's incredible.
Yessss! These are amazing.
My favorite parts are all the extra touches that weren't in the original animation, such as Rose beginning to realizing how badly she was tricked - or Jade, unused to her own powers, almost knocking John on his ass while she teleports him.
Anonymous asked: Now that you've seen what a Reckoning on Skaia looks like, you can see why Karkat was rushing Kanaya to get their frog done. Despite jumping the gun, skipping the lore elements and just killing their way to the end, the troll kids never had enough time. Especially since, now that I'm thinking about it, if it wasn't the Reckoning then it probably would have been Jack as the "time's up, now turn in your work" event. @marinerofthestars asked: With the revelation that Alternia was built to and ended up speedrunning an Sgrub/Sburb session to catastrophic effect (great job reading this far, btw), how long would you expect a ā€œstandardā€ session to take?
We've got two different asks here - one saying that normal sessions are meant to be shorter than Hivebent's, and the other saying they're meant to be longer.
I honestly don't know which I believe. It feels unrealistic for a Sburb session to take months, but Scratch really did seem to be saying that the trolls were extremely effective Players, implying most sessions take longer to beat. Maybe the reboot session will clue us in a little?
Anonymous asked: ā€œHow do you expect to out run me, When I Am Already Here.ā€ Is such a hard line, and itā€™s completely missable in the alt text for the site banner. I know a lot of people missed it when these panels dropped. I remember HS being considered super unique because of how much the comic messes with formatting things like that.
I was super close to missing some of that scene, even though I'd already been warned about the alt text. There was just so much going on at the time, I almost didn't think to look at the banners.
@royalvorpal asked: "I thought words would be exchanged" How do you expect them to talk when they are in person?
pffffffffffffffffffft
Alright, that one fucking got me.
@bladekindeyewear asked: "But no, apparently not, because it took Karkat zero words and sixty seconds to completely shut Gamzee down. Now, donā€™t get me wrong, thatā€™s incredibly impressive - but what did he actually do?" If you look back IN RETROSPECT at some of what Gamzee has been telling Karkat, it almost looks like pale flirting, like he was actually WANTING him to do this behind his threats. p3361: "FTC: i wonder if you can all be at with me in time and make me get my reconsider on?" Anonymous asked: You may not like it, but this is what peak moirallegience looks like.
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Yeah, this really does make that exchange read as a little flirtatious.
Still, is this really how a moirallegiance is meant to work? Are moirails really expected to risk their lives to halt their prospective partner's rampage? This is starting to sound more dangerous than a kismesissitude!
@bladekindeyewear asked: I'm not sure how well it applies to the revised Homestuck website and it's probably impossible in the collection, but you could view any past/future page in any CSS format the site gave you with a keyword, like the black-on-green Doc Scratch format. So when Andrew did the "SNOP" to SBAHJ-mode, he was intentionally giving us a tool to view the ENTIRE SITE in SBAHJ mode.
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There's a 'theme override' button, but I need to finish Homestuck to unlock it. I guess the comic's theme will change in more spoilery ways, later on.
Anonymous asked: Dolorosa/Mindfang is the true kicker of the ā€œvriska keeps ending up in mirror relationships to her ancestorā€ belief, bc its the one where there is NO way vriska could know that shes in a mirror relationship. Eridan- orphaner dualscar and mindfangs romance was in the journal. Tavros- she knew about the summoner. But while there are hints to the dolorosas identity- sharp teeth, lower blood color, and a very vague if you stretch it hint about horn shape- no way vriska could have put those pieces together!!!
Man, it's still so fucked up that the Dolorosa went out like that. I still think it's at least remotely possible that she revived as a vampire, but I'm not gonna kid myself - her story is over. We're not gonna see her.
Anonymous asked: You've mentioned "ratfic" and something called "the Methods" before, is that something you've read?
If I could write an essay about Steven Moffat, I could write an entire thesis about Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality - but it'd be radioactively critical, and it feels mean-spirited to just post a rant about something unprompted.
If people want my thoughts in detail, I might stick them on the sideblog later - but for now, I'll just tell you that if it wasn't for that fic, XAE A-12 Musk would never have been born. Not a joke.
Anonymous asked: i love the complete about face on gamzee lol. "clearly the fact that he's gone nuts is something wrong with the timeline" gamzee is revealed to be responsible for lil cal "actually fuck this guy"
If we do ever recover the original Gamzee, it's going to really suck for him to face his friends. After everything he's done, will anyone ever really trust him again?
@elkian asked: Love the Exiles. So glad nothing bad happens to them, ever, (I assume the pause before the third s175 post is bc you, like me, took a break to cry over AR hesitating to kill his friend :,(
I was so bummed, guys. Carapacians don't have ghosts, I assume - so the Exiles, sans PM and maybe WV, are gone forever.
The Red Miles will probably have obliterated their corpses, so we can't even prototype most of them - but I'm holding out hope for Waywardsprite.
Anonymous asked: heh, you aren't alone in preferring god tier dave without his hood. i was around for when cascade dropped and wasnt able to watch it straight away due to the various troubles, but one of the first things i heard about it was people talking about how stupid they thought dave's hood looked.
I know, right? Like, yeah, it definitely says 'knight', but Dave's got great hair, and it feels like a shame to cover it.
@bladekindeyewear asked: "PCG: SHE WAS CONSTANTLY FIXING MY FUCKUPS. PCG: ROBOTS FROM THE FUTURE ALWAYS COMING BACK TO TELL ME HOW SOME HASTY SHIT I DID WITH FROG BREEDING OR WHATEVER WOULD MAKE IT BE IMPOSSIBLE TO WIN. PCG: MY OWN PERSONAL MISTAKES PROBABLY ACCOUNTED FOR MORE DOOMED ARADIABOTS THAN ANYTHING ELSE." Now that the Tumor's revealed for the precision device it was, it's also clear that Aradia, likely following the Horrorterrors' instructions, FORCED them to breed the frog JUST RIGHT to create the Sun.
Yeah, the existence of that precision device really fucking threw me. Whatever it did, the frog cancer probably was deliberately engineered to cause it - and I think it was engineered by Scratch, rather than the Horrorterrors. He was also talking to Aradia during the session, and this event was key to his plan.
Anonymous asked: (And one more ask from the person without a tumblr. -DJ) The thing is, Scratch could have just said "you must create the Green Sun, it is essential for the existence of the multiverse, not doing so will create a paradox". But either he chose to trick them, by only but saying "true words", just for funā€¦or there is some reason telling them about their true mission wouldn't work - RM
Either is possible, and it's pretty much impossible to say. That said, the Vast Glub is proof that he does just like messing with people, so I'm going with the former answer.
Anonymous asked: (forwarding another ask from the person without a Tumblr account -DJ) Do you think there are interesting parallels between Scratch and Tarquin from OOTS? - RM
Well, they are both meta-aware villains with extremely wide-reaching plans, and they're both pretty weird about women. Hopefully this means that Scratch's much cooler son will kick his ass in a later Act.
@bladekindeyewear asked: One tiny cute detail in Cascade I love is how when the Green Sun lights up in the distance for the trolls, Terezi tries to point at it, and Karkat gently takes her arm and re-points it in the right direction. XD
Shoulda brought the Smelloscope, Terezi!
Anonymous asked: The first time i read homestuck my shit bugged out and I literally just missed the entire scrapbook section and cascade. The SECOND time I read homestuck cascade gave me such a neuron firing high that only harrow the ninth has ever gotten close to
That's exactly how to describe it. Cascade blasted my neurons, in exactly the same way that part of Harrow the Ninth did.
@rwbypro asked: Ngl one of my favorite parts about homestuck is the fact that Doc Scratch Won, like he got Exactly what he wanted, and he played everyone like fiddles, one of my all time favorite villains in anything!
He did, the bastard! Scratch managed to pull it off without a hitch.
These are the exact kind of convoluted masterstrokes you want to see in a time-travel story, and I think English's machinations will only grow more intricate, going forward.
@sanctferum asked: The juggalo cult believes in a pair of mirthful messiahs rather than just the one, so if English is one of the messiahs, that's only half the equation. Presumably, the other messiah would be Scratch.
That works! I originally thought that the Messiahs were the two members of ICP, but let's be honest, they still could be. I absolutely would not put it past this comic to reveal that Lord English was Shaggy 2 Dope the whole time.
@sanctferum asked: So now that you've seen Lord English's true appearance: he's got a peg leg, and that peg leg is a golden cuestick, filling in the last missing piece of the Felt analogy - the one that moves the billiards around in the first place. For good measure, English's peg leg, single golden tooth and his garish coat give him a stereotypical pimp appearance, which is fitting given his treatment of his female servants so far (not to mention Scratch's own treatment of both the Handmaid and whichever female player he is manipulating at any given moment. He even explicitly uses the word grooming to describe raising Handmaid!). If there was ever a pimp for Dave to lock in his own crib while dropping it like it was hot, this would be him.
Ayy, you're right! I've been waiting for the Felt's cuestick since the Intermission days!
You're also right about the comic's villains. Scratch and English aren't just screwing over female Players - they've also been fucking with Mindfang, the Handmaid, the Condesce, and even Snowman. It's absolutely a pattern.
These guys aren't just cosmic villains, they're misogynist cosmic villains. Mundane evil and supernatural evil, all together in one convenient package of shit.
Anonymous asked: Now that we've gotten past this point in the comic- I just wanted to say I forgot Expatri8 was ever a name used to refer to Darkleer- mainly because all I ever see people refering to him as is Darkleer. And at first it kinda threw me for a loop when you called him that even though it's the only name you knew for him- Anyhows- You probably noted this at some point but only upper middle class to high blood colors seem to have name names, with some exceptions. Like, they're weird, but Mindfang, Redglare, and Dualscar are all fesable names. Meanwhile the lower bloods just have titles.
It is absolutely in character of Alternia not to allow lowbloods to have names.
Anonymous asked: Just read your liveblog over the last two days. I adore your analysis! I second that one personā€™s reccomendation of In Stars And Time. Also I reccomend the Blue Lips homestuck video, itā€™s lived in my head for ages. Iā€™m 99% sure itā€™s safe to watch now? Itā€™s about the events of murderstuck and I donā€™t THINK it references anything you donā€™t know. Anyhoot! I know you mentioned vriska being like Azula when you first started getting to know her. Now that youā€™re as far as you are, Iā€™d like to argueā€¦ Vriska is more like Zuko, in a way? Like. The way she wants to wipe things clean, the way he wants to restore his honor. The way they both have a ā€œparentā€ that leads them to how things are, and for a while they cling to that as ā€œrightā€ and how things should beā€¦ One time I saw a post that Vriska is girl Zuko and Eridan is boy Azula and all the comments were arguing that no, vriska is Azula, but lowkey that post changed my brain chemistry and idk why people were SO vehemently against changing the genders of the characters in the comparison
I think Vriska works well as girl Zuko. You're right - they both started off under the thumb of an abusive parent, and they both try to 'fix' their past mistakes without understanding the wider context behind why they made them. Now, does this mean Vriska will also be getting a kickass redemption arc, which turns her into one of the comic's most straightforwardly heroic characters? Possibly, but I ain't holding my breath.
It's a little harder for me to see the second comparison, though. Like her brother, Azula was made into what she is by her horrible father, whereas Eridan became what he is on his own, with some assistance from Alternian culture.
Perhaps there are layers here that I'm just not seeing. I haven't read the Avatar sequel comics yet, so they might do more with Azula's character that I don't know about.
@mrjocrafter asked: I was trying to think about what the characters' moon alignment means in terms of their characterization, thought "Prospit dreamers are relatively passive while Derse dreamers are relatively active", then realized that's only true for the humans, the Post-Scratch Trolls' 6 Prospit dreamers (excluding Sollux, as his 'official' alignment, according to the Extended Zodiac, is Derse) are the more active characters. Then I realized that on Earth darkness and dark-associated characters are edgy and countercultural, while on Alternia light and light-associated characters are countercultural instead! Goddamn this comic just keeps coming back for more themes Also, I know you've compared Taylor to Vriska in the past, but she really strikes me as more of a Terezi. Beyond the surface level stuff (like going blind and then relying on a supernatural sense), Taylor, like Terezi has a strong moral compass but will twist it into pretzels to do the most horrific shit and there's a 50/50 chance she even regrets it afterwards. Meanwhile, Amy, who I think makes a much better Vriska, does her atrocities either under manipulation (like Vriska) or just does it without thinking about it and feels bad about it later (hey, also like Vriska). Also, Taylor Hebert and Amelia Dallon are coincidentally both valid troll names.
Yup! Which means Kanaya is a troll goth, which is still amazing.
And... hmm, I'm not sure whether I'd call Dave active or passive. He certainly acts more on his own initiative than John, but he also spends a lot of time getting bossed around by Terezi. He's kind of in the middle, really.
I do think Terezi's reframing of her violence as 'justice' is very Taylor-coded - and Amy is absolutely a Vriska, if we're working off the 'female, controversial, and morally ambiguous' definition given by a previous asker. Plus, well...
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...yeah. And let's not even talk about Ward. (Because I haven't read it.)
Really, all these characters are multifaceted, and you can draw many different parallels in many different directions. If I had the time, I could probably draw lines from each of the trolls to a different cape in the Wormverse - but for now, we must continue!
@morganwick asked: Bec's influence on Jack is so strong that not only is he reduced to following Jade around like a puppy, he kills CD for completing the mission he gave him and leaves Jade, one of the players he's supposed to be killing, on her quest bed, the nature of which he didn't seem to know about when it came to John. Bec = absolute king.
Bec is a king.
It really does seem like his influence over Jack is increasing as time passes. Is Davesprite going to get more birdlike, as well? Or is Bec just a special case because he's a First Guardian?
Anonymous asked: oh my god you really just cleaned the board with the last minute Dave+Rose quest slab guess??? Like. You were going on about other things and then you just casually mention "oh I guess this could happen too" like okay!!! Seer!!!!
Yeah, I'm pretty proud of that one. I was just thinking about how Aradia might help the Derse kids, once she'd met them at the Sun, and then it hit me: she's been in exactly the same situation, in exactly the same place, because of exactly the same sun!
Anonymous asked: dogtier IS in fact what the entire fandom calls her, if you came up with that yourself congrats on the authentic 2011 homestuck experience, move over carcinisation this is the new big thing in convergent evolution
I did, but come on. That pun makes itself.
Anonymous asked: Fun fact: the music used in [S] Begin Intermission 2, "English", is the same when reversed. It is an EXTREMELY excellent detail. And another example of Toby Fox being a brilliant composer. @sanctferum asked: English by Toby Fox is a really cool song in that its a musical palindrome, playing the same both forwards and backwards, as befits the titular entity. The whole Felt album it's from is based around creating songs with time gimmicks in them, so it serves as a very good semifinal track to almost close the album out. @emotionallyglued asked: You finally got to the part where our big bad man appears! Simple question to ask but I'm looking forward towards the answer: what do you think of Lord English's theme? Grandiose enough to fit a villain of his caliber or did you expect something more/else?
Oh, shit, that's cool!
I liked the song a lot. Sure, it's not as bombastic as the boss theme I went with myself, but it is much, much scarier. It was the perfect way to remind us that this wasn't really a victory - that English's plan went off without a hitch. Our heroes are still in terrible, terrible danger.
@morganwick asked: post/756751870755733504 Still think of Doc Scratch as "Big Cal"? @sanctferum asked: You've heard of Lil' Cal and Big Cal, now get ready for the deadliest and dastardliest villain of all: Biggest Cal. Anonymous asked: you've seen lil cal, now get ready for BIG CAL @lon-kasi asked: finally, Big Ca- well. actually. Scratch was Big Cal, wasn't he? so finally, Bigger Cal
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This is the real reason Scratch wouldn't tell Rose his boss's name - because if she'd known her manipulator worked for Bigger Cal, she'd have been too god damn scared to go grimdark.
Anonymous asked: T1ck T0ck goes the God Tier Clock. Its chime signals the Br8k of Scratch's H34D. And with the arrival of Lord English, he lets loose two great, Vast honk HONKS. Anonymous asked: Did you notice something about the English sequence? First, we see Scratch's clock. t1ck, t0ck. Then, his head breaks. 8r8k H34DS. He releases the Vast Honk. honk HONK.
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This motherfucker died to the very words that birthed him.
I guarantee you that this was deliberate on Scratch's part. He didn't need to foreshadow his plan so blatantly - but this horrible little troll knew that nobody would get the joke until it was too late.
bladekindeyewear asked: "S u c k e r s ." The bioorganic-looking Tumor opening up to reveal a precision device. Twice the mass of a universe. Doc Scratch fucking played EVERYONE SO HARD. We couldn't believe THEY CREATED THE GREEN SUN, so hard many of us watched without REALIZING IT. If you reread the talk Doc and Rose had from p3627 onward, the amount of TRANSPARENT DODGES AND WEASELING he did in that conversation to mislead Rose and the entire readership is so blatant and shameless, oh my fucking god!!! Anonymous asked: Not only did Scratch never said the tumor would destroy the green sun, he also specifically said they would travel to the green sun LOCATION, not to the green sun itself.
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God damn it!
Scratch may have been stoic on the outside, but you mark my words: he was absolutely roaring with laughter on the inside.
@sunbluethinking asked: Regarding 'a dozen or two sweeps,' you do have to remember that it seems like one sweep is roughly equivalent to two human years? (See Terezi's and Dave's 'I'm six' conversation, or whatever it was.) So my impression is that a dozen sweeps would be equivalent to 24 years and two dozen sweeps would be equivalent to 48 years. Still really short, but not quite as absurdly short. (Which actually reminds me of the question of the problem of rate of maturation in fictional races with different lifespans. (Dungeon Meshi touches on this, but) in the case of Homestuck, I think it seems like the trolls mature to adulthood at about the same rate. It's just their adult lifespans that are different.) @bellcarved asked: If my math is correct, "a dozen or two sweeps" is a range of 26 to 52 years. Still not great, but 26 would be the low end of the life expectancy, while they tend to live around half as long as a human.
So either Aradia was about to die, or she wasn't - but either way, she was always going to die young.
We still don't know whether God Tier stops you aging, do we? I have to assume so, because death by old age isn't really Heroic or Just, but I'd feel a lot better if it was 100% confirmed.
Anonymous asked: And here we learn the story of Jesus and the second coming- @bellcarved asked: Now you know the truth: Karkat Vantas is the second coming of Troll Jegus Christ. Anonymous asked: I doubt I'm the first to say this but, the story of the Signless is undeniably based off the story of Jesus Christ. @skelekingfeddy asked: you do realise that the sufferer is Troll Jegus right. the irons/cancer symbol is the crucifix. his method of execution turned into the main symbol of a religion. the dolorosa is mary. karkat is the second coming. hes literally just Troll Jegus lmao @sanctferum asked: turns out, Terezi was right all along. troll jegus was real after all, and he was indeed the best jegus. shame on you for not believing, Dave
God damn it, Karkat. You hate yourself so much, even though you're literally the second coming of Christ.
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And really does add weight to Terezi's claim that Alternia had the 'best' Jesus. Sure, says she's joking here, but... well, her Ancestor was a follower of the Signless, wasn't she? Could Terezi have inherited more of Redglare's legacy than we thought?
Anonymous asked: now that you know about the signless i recommend you take another read of karkat's long password on page 3972
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...huh.
It almost makes it seem like Karkat's vaguely cognizant of the Sufferer's life, the same way the Sufferer was cognizant of his pre-Scratch incarnation. Funny, that.
@morganwick asked: "For a bisexual alien, his shipping is awfully straight, isn't it?" Well, consider that when he drew that he was trying to adhere to the human model of reproduction with its explicit requirement of one person of each sex, as best he could from his alien perspective. Note that in the same conversation he's struggling to understand the "human taboo of incest". @manorinthewoods asked: Karkat's humanshipping is straight because John told him he wasn't gay, and presumably, he extrapolated. ~LOSS (28/12/24) Anonymous asked: Karkat's very straight shipping chart is the way it is because John's Not A Homosexual:tm:
I totally forgot I came to the same conclusion, back in that legendary group chat.
Man, Rose x Kanaya is really going to throw Karkat for a loop. He'll probably think that John was just bullshitting him.
@skelekingfeddy asked: steven moffat is a valid troll name Anonymous asked: You've brought it up too much not to ask, what did Moffat do that pissed you off so badly?
Once more, I am very tempted to make this a full essay, but I'll save time by just pointing to Hbomberguy's famous Sherlock video, which I agree with, like, 80% of - particularly the Doctor Who segment that I've timestamped.
In a nutshell, Moffat was always really good at generating intrigue, and building hype for future events - but as a showrunner, he never really delivered on his promises, and was very fond of handwaving established canon to the side. Pet peeve of mine, as you can imagine.
@rwbypro asked: We warned you bro, we warned you about the most important character @skelekingfeddy asked: carcinoGeneticist may have engineered the cancerā€¦but terminallyCapricious was the one who made it terminal. ;o) @capribornio asked: Honk, honk :0) Heyyyy you reached the part where Gamzee became my favorite enemy. Forget Vriska, Jack and Doc Scratch - Gamzee may have his buttons pushed by the good ol' Doc, but he managed to make things worse than even Vriska got to (and killed more main characters, too!). Anonymous asked:Congratulations on reaching this point. So, Gamzee chucklefucked the universe. Crazy, right? @bellcarved asked: Gamzee's "Bard of Rage" title is looking more accurate than ever, now. His own rage lead him to put the clowns in John's dreams, which ended up inspiring the rage that made Jack Noir go to the lengths he did. Bardic inspiration, if you will. ā€¦also, this makes Perfect Jack a collaborative effort between Vriska and Gamzee. @capribornio asked: I feel like you get Gamzee much better than most livebloggers (and a part of the fandom, too). Gamzee is an orchestrator, on a much bigger level than any could have predicted. The silly little troll dissappeared once he got off the slime, got his religion destroyed, and got Lil Cal.
I told you, guys! I told you Bards were overpowered!
Yeah, he's already getting pretty crafty, isn't he? Maybe, instead of manipulating Gamzee like he did the girls, Scratch has actually been coaching him. After all, his own manipulating days are over, so maybe he saw fit to train a successor...
Anonymous asked: if vriska was presented with a choice about the creation of bec noir, it would have had to be before the veil because the trolls only flee into the veil AFTER bec shows up and wrecks their reward- and that's their first introduction to him. any choice she could have made about bec/jack after that would result in a doomed timeline, because it would break the loop. that's why it has to be before the veil. @manorinthewoods asked: What I mean is that the Choice that would have prevented Bec Noir is something that would have made Vriska change who she was, in such a way that she wouldn't later make Bec. Vriska's Choice that made Bec can't have occurred in the Veil, because there wasn't a Denizen to give it, so whatever it was, it must have been something to do with character growth that she failed to do. ~LOSS (28/12/24)
Oh, right, that makes sense!
Yeah, poor Vriska simply wasn't self-aware enough to make such a Choice before the Veil. It's interesting what-if, though.
@flambeaufelid asked: ICP albums liveblog maybe??? (Do people liveblog music reactions? They should.) Anonymous asked: Since you mentioned the possibility of having to listen to ICP albums to understand Gamzee better, I figured Iā€™d better let you know that while reading a bit about juggalos, ICP, and ICPā€™s music does help with understanding Gamzee better if youā€™re unfamiliar with them (though I wouldnā€™t say itā€™s crucial), I donā€™t recommend listening to their music unless youā€™re comfortable with graphic depictions of gore, murder, and other forms of violence. (Speaking from personal experience here; I tried listening to them because Gamzeeā€™s my favorite character and quickly realized I didnā€™t enjoy that.) Anonymous asked: I would say listening to icp is not necessaryā€¦ I tried myself and failed not even half way through one album so I admittedly could be wrong butā€¦ I think it was never intended to be THAT serious
I checked out Miracles, back when ICP was first brought up, but I haven't seen any of their other music. It's probably not actually necessary to listen to the band to understand Gamzee, but I might still do it for fun, since the graphic content wouldn't bother me much.
@skelekingfeddy asked: according to hussie the fifth wall is what divides two narrators/authors @sanctferum asked: According to Hussie's comments, if the fourth wall is the wall between the character and the author/their audience, then the fifth wall is specifically the wall dividing omniscient narrators from each other. or something like that
I, uh, guess that makes sense. Presumably Scratch would be our second 'author' in this scenario, even though he's not literally another author of Homestuck.
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thevixenwitch Ā· 3 days ago
Text
Metaphysical Shop Red Flags:
Little bit of a disclaimer on this one: This post is made from my personal experience. If you have a small business, this post is not about you, but hey if some of these things stand out to you, maybe it's worth analyzing your business model.
I am someone that's been active in irl and online pagan and witch spaces for over a decade now, and am compiling this from my own experiences, as well as those of my partners. I'm also a tad anti-capitalist, so an alternative title for this post could be "How to Spot if You're Actually that Metaphysical Shop's Cash Cow".
Now, let's get started.
Unknown or unethically sourced White Sage is a really noticeable starting place. Once I was at a market and saw cute smoke cleansing bundles with dried flowers and cinnamon sticks and quartz points, very pretty, very flashy! But when I asked where the Sage was sourced, the lady manning the booth said they were from Amazon. Some sellers value visual appeal to make a sale over anything else.
Overt appropriation via bulk, drop shipped items like ā€œsmudgingā€ tools, dream catchers, etc. This list of items can vary dramatically based on who owns the shop, what practices exist in your area, so itā€™s good to educate yourself on how to spot appropriation. This does NOT mean ethically sourced options that benefit marginalized communities, thatā€™s what we want to insist our local shops have for us to buy!
On that note, a lack of local creators and/or sourcing in general. Not every store has a goal of being a community hub, but beyond that they are still very visible aspects of the community. It strikes me as very odd that I can more reliably buy locally sourced herbs from a random gift shop than I can from a metaphysical store no matter which state Iā€™m in.
Crystals with no information about where they were sourced. There is a growing issue with the intense demand for crystals that has caused an increase in unethical sources, so knowing where your purchases come from is important. Compare prices at metaphysical shops to those at your local rock shop, especially if you are lucky enough to have one run by gemologist, geologist, or rockhound. I have talked about this already elsewhere, so I wonā€™t bog down this post too much with it. The short of it is, transparency is a green flag.
This one may be controversial, but dramatic markups in general. Donā€™t be afraid to compare prices to other places, particularly other local options if they are available. A few dollars variance is normal, but a huge markup should be obvious. Things like location can have a huge impact on price, which is good to keep in mind. The availability and price of something can vary wildly based on that factor alone, but thatā€™s why I recommend checking against other options within your area. Do remember that comparing to Amazon prices isnā€™t fair to small businesses, and ā€œcheapā€ is not the goal here.
If the contents of the store are all drop-shipped, or bulk stock that can definitely be something to keep an eye out for. If the place is full of items you can actually look up on Amazon, that may be worth paying attention to.
Prevalence of well-known problematic authors. If they have Silver Ravenwolf on a central display, thatā€™s always something that tells me a shop prioritizes making a sale over providing quality products. If thereā€™s an overwhelming presence of Lewellyn published books with minimal alternatives, that shows a lack of care for diversity or quality control.
AI items. Letā€™s be so for real here. Walking into a shop and seeing an obviously AI generated altar cloth with gibberish symbols all over it is a bad thing. Iā€™ll talk more on the rising presence of AI thatā€™s very negatively influencing the quality of information available in the pagan community at a later time.
Bulk resin and 3D printed items. Weā€™ve all seen them, the vendor at a fair with an army of dozens of jointed dragons, or ten resin-cast, glitter-filled Gaia statues that light up! All so sparkly, colorful, and eye-catching. Iā€™d implore anyone to learn more about how much plastic waste is involved in bulk production of low-quality products like this.
What my wife likes to call ā€œApple Store vibesā€. Call me traditional, but when a store is all sleek white lines and tidy, understocked shelves, I know Iā€™m in for some of the highest prices for incense Iā€™ve ever seen. These stores are meant to bring in people with money burning a hole in their pocket, and thatā€™s often reflected in the visually appealing kitsch that never actually seems to serve a purpose.
This can be a red flag SOMETIMES but not always: A lack of diversity in the paths represented. Sometimes a shop is just a reflection of the ownerā€™s personal practice, or the focuses of the local community. Other times, there can be a reflected air of superiority of one path over others. This is entirely dependent on the individual store.
A big one Iā€™d like to end on; they only host paid classes and services with no way for under-served members of the community to attend or participate. This is made even worse if the events are all over $20. Especially if this store is the only option in your area for these things! Instead of providing a service, they could be focused on cornering the market.
A quick Green Flag for some positivity, the presence of the owners or staffā€™s personal practice! I love being able to ask for insight from the source, I love being able to buy someoneā€™s personal oil blends, I love learning more about things I may not have thought about because Iā€™m not walking that path myself. Staff that want to chat and help can be so nice and really add to a welcoming environment.
Supporting small businesses is so important, and they can really be cornerstones of our community, but we need to be able to see the difference between someone passionate about providing resources and space to a community, and others that are looking to make a quick buck off of people starving for that. We as consumers need to hold our communities to some kind of standard, and I for one find that my standard is a certain level of authenticity. Not everyone selling metaphysical tools and supplies is trying to scam someone, but there are bad actors everywhere. Educate yourself, keep your eyes open, and donā€™t be afraid to ask yourself what someoneā€™s motivations are.
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atzhrts Ā· 22 hours ago
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ik everyone is on a riize kick but do u have any thoughts on any ateez members šŸ‘‰šŸ¼šŸ‘ˆšŸ¼
i always have thoughts for my ults <3
i miss them so bad the concert needs to come quicker šŸ˜­ & i hope wooyoung feels better asap :(
includes in order of the member (age order): recording | tying hwa up | hand kink, choking | strength kink | body worship | pillow princess mingi | mirror sex | degradation (whore)
hongjoong who loves fucking you in his studio. just telling you to get on his lap whenever he needs a break, but youā€™d need to be quick before he gets back to work. he definitely has a song with your voice or moans in it, whispering a dirty little message for his new favorite song that no one will ever hear but him.
seonghwa who loves getting tied up by you because he know you think he looks so so pretty. but at the end of the day heā€™d still be the one in charge, hands tied above his head as his hips snap into yours. the harshness of his thrust sending you flying forward, placing your hands on his chest to stabilize yourself and burying your face in his neck.
yunho who knows you have the biggest thing for his hands, always subtly placing them on your body. on your thighs when heā€™s driving, on your waist whenever heā€™s opening a door for you or around your neck when he is rearranging your guts. definitely the type to run his finger over your cheek and down your chest to tease you.
yeosang who is obsessed with feeling how much stronger he is than you, dragging you up the stair before picking your up and shoving you against the wall. one hand supporting your thigh wrapped around his waist and the other one caressing your cheeks. hard bulge pressed against your center, making you feel the heat through a level of clothes as he gently starts rocking his body against yours.
san who loves having you worship his body, sitting on the bed in front of you, hands on your waist as you massage his shoulders. nails gently scratching over his skin before you move them over his pecs down his abs, one finger running down over his bulge before you place each of your legs on either side of his, sitting down on his lap. lips attaching themselves to the side of his neck, pressing kisses all the way up to his ear telling him how good he looks and your fingers squeezing his bicep whining about how big it is all while you can feel his bulge twitching against your center.
mingi who loves being a pillow princess, your lips just feel so so good around his dick and it has his mind spinning for the rest of the night. laying on his back, fucked out eyes staring into yours and you can just tell his mind is filled with you and you only. watching your tits bounce in his face as you use him to make yourself feel good, heā€™d try to thrust up into you every now and then but looses his strength after 2-3 thrust, your tight heat just feels way too good.
wooyoung who loves fucking you in front of a mirror, watching your reactions when he hits a particular good spot. one of his hand coming down to play with your clit, chuckling when your head falls back against his shoulder before telling you to watch yourself getting fucked. groaning over how you clench around him whenever the two of you make eye contact through the mirror and he sees your fucked out state. also likes watching himself in the mirror
jongho who has mastered the combination of ordering your around and treating you like his princess. telling you to get on your knees before gently caressing your cheeks, asking if your knees are comfortable. or pushing your legs over his shoulders and then making sure youā€™re not being stretched too much. calling you a whore and telling you youā€™re his perfect little girl in the same sentence.
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animeomegas Ā· 3 days ago
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I can just imagine Belphie with a baby that will not sleep by any means and it drives him absolutely crazy. I think he would become so agitated all the time, along with battling his post-partum brain :( heā€™d def blame it on his alpha (whom would of course step in and try their very best to take care of their very sleepy mate and insomniac baby) .
Maybe Belphie would harbor some guilt as a parent ? He would be happy to get his sleep but I think he might feel a little inadequate as a parent if he sees his alpha working so hard to take care of both of them and he canā€™t get it together. Especially if he didnā€™t want a child in the first place, I think heā€™d struggle even more .
He... would go insane. It would be a nightmare of epic proportions.
Especially because the baby is not human, so the newborn phase is like... idk at least a few years long.
I think the stress, the sleep deprivation, the regret, the hormones, and the guilt stir into a horrible cocktail that leaves Belphie struggling a lot. He probably breaks down into tears, dissociates completely, or becomes angry multiple times a day.
The saving grace in this situation is that there are six uncles on hand at all times.
Lucifer is extremely taken with the baby and will take the baby in the evenings several times a week. He has a little rocking crib put by his bed which he rocks with his foot while he does paperwork.
Mammon gets on a bit better with toddlers and older, but he still adores his nibling deeply! He's not exactly a reliable babysitter to a newborn sometimes, but he has a surprising amount of patience with the little one. He walks around the house for hours at night sometimes, just rocking the baby until they fall asleep. He likes to talk out loud with them, and if you ever overhear him, you'll hear him promising to teach and protect them.
Levi is extremely out of his depth with a newborn, but in a midnight emergency, he's always awake. He will fetch whatever you need, heat up milk, or wash bedding. Sometimes that kind of help is a lifeline.
Satan feels strange at the way the family dynamics have changed, but he is a surprising baby whisperer. If the baby won't stop crying, you can hand them to Satan, and they'll fall asleep for a least two precious hours.
Asmo is definitely the kind of uncle that promises to babysit all the time but is actually easily overwhelmed by a baby. He won't take his nibling over night, no way, but his photoshoots for Devilgram take quite a bit of time, so you can sneak some sleep in while he's busy. Also, you and Belphie never have to buy any clothes, because Asmo has bought more than enough.
And Beel, of course, sweet Beel. He is entirely mystified by his new nibling, his twin's baby. He's in love in every way. He takes the baby all. the. time. He learns how to do everything he can to take care of his nibling, but he never forgets to look after his twin either. He makes sure Belphie is bathing, sleeping as much as he can, and eating enough.
With the uncles around, Belphie and his alpha get some moments to curl up together. They can barely stay awake but they both manage it just long enough to apologise for the snapping and irritable moods, to reassure each other that they haven't made a horrible mistake, and that they love each other.
And then they can fall asleep together and recuperate, while the pup is getting passed around each uncle and showered with love.
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iamthepulta Ā· 3 months ago
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@joemomrgneissguy SPACE MINING. HO BOY.
So when mining comes into a conversation, there are several 'laws' of mining and processing that I like to consider that people tend to forget:
Location and rarity of commodity
Location and rarity of extraction techniques/reagents
What is necessary for this operation to work?
Where does the finished product go?
Some of these are extraneous. Theoretically, we don't have to care that iron is common on earth and might be present on the moon, so it changes the conversation from "why?" to "how would we?". Same with extraction and reagents. If you don't care how expensive it is to ship- for example: water and carbon dioxide to the moon because you want to process He-3, nothing can stop you.
However, what will stop planning, is processing. Blowing up a rock is easy. Collecting the rock and breaking it into a usable form is not. If there isn't a plan for exactly what commodity is being mined and how to separate it and all the equipment that needs to be made to get it into a usable form, and a plan to get that equipment into space. God help the poor bastard.
And fundamentally, no matter HOW you turn it, people use the finished product. If there are no people where you are mining the Thing, you need to have a way for the Thing to get back to the people who need it. WHY are you mining the Thing? What is economic about the Thing being made? and Is it worth the money?
[angry geologist rant under the cut]
So the thing about space and asteroids is metals come in native form a lot of the time because there's nothing to oxidize them; it makes processing simpler and the density increases profit. This is usually what people talk about when they go off about space mining: Ohh, if we just reach this asteroid 400 years away there's so much Gold and Platinum! Ohh, if we just crashed a FUCKING ASTEROID INTO EARTH OR MARS we could be so rich!
However this is a LIE for two reasons: It's actually harder to process straight sulfides or straight metal because they aren't brittle. Instead of breaking into smaller pieces you can separate and process, they jam the crusher. Universities with mining departments often have huge chunks of impressive high-grade sitting around that were donated by companies when they jammed their fucking system. If you can't break it down, it's a useless fucking clump of rock.
Secondly, even if you have native metals clumped together like an iron-nickel asteroid, unless you want an iron-nickel product, you have to separate them. Since it's not brittle, you would have to pour a bunch of hydrochloric on it and wait for the reaction to dissolve the outer surface.
And all this is assuming the metals are on Earth. If not, you have to figure out how to do this in space. How much HCl will you need? How are you going to fly it up there? How are you going to break it down? How are you going to replace parts when they inevitably break?
The big "commodity" on the moon is Helium-3, which is extremely rare on Earth. (So yes, we have a need, and yes, there's substantial reason to mine it in a place where it's more accessible.) The logic starts breaking down around "getting it back" and "how does the operation work": In moon quantities (up to 15 parts per billion (ppb)), you have to mine about 150 tons to extract 1g of He-3. That's not unreasonable, to be honest, since economic gold hovers around 7-12 ppb. And technically you'd only have to heat the rock to 600-700 C. However, things do melt at those temperatures. Then you have to get it back to earth. Either a SpaceX-style return and come back, or a drop shipments- It's just insane to me though that we would use SO MANY RESOURCES to rip up the fucking moon, even with an automated system, when if you look at He-3 we already produce what equals 11 pounds of He-3 yearly from Oil and Gas deposits, it's just not collected.
I have more beef with planets that are theoretically resource-rich, but people just- don't care about getting them back to Earth? Venus has significant metal-Sulfides and Tellurides in its atmosphere, which is why people joke about the "floating oxygen colonies" on Venus. But congratulations! You've colonized a planet that is inaccessible to human technology because anything we've ever designed will dissolve. Same with Europa. To design something that works on Venus - not to mention extracts things in the proper form to be used in human conditions - and/or get them back to Earth means redesigning how we think of the properties of the periodic table.
With extraction, we play a lot with oxidation states, and one of the rules is to stay within Earth's aqueous conditions. If you oxidize anything too much, your solution will want to vaporize to oxygen. Reduce anything too much, and your solution will want to vaporize to hydrogen gas.
So, if you design anything on Earth designed for conditions on Venus, it will be unstable. If you design anything on Venus meant for Earth, it will be unstable.
Which is kind of the end of my rant, I guess. Don't crash something into Earth unless you can process it. If you can process it in space, can you get it back? Who's responsible when the thing breaks? Why the fuck is money being spent when 9 times out of 10 we have it here on earth with the conditions we're familiar with?
If we've somehow depleted Earth enough that we need resources from other planets, which would insinuate we have not figured out how to recycle our own metals, which is untrue, and likewise we have no business in space anyway- Where did all our resources go? Are we leaving for those other planets? Do we have faster-than-light travel to collect the new resources in a timely manner?
There isn't even water in space half the time and if you do have a colony on Mars and tech bros are going to process all the hematite to build their shitty underground Martian city, are they shipping water from the north and south poles to do this? Have they figured out how to renew the carbon filters that are going to be needed to get all the waste and organics out of it once it's used?
In my opinion, it's all just fucking stupid. Space mining tries to answer a question that doesn't need to be asked with people who don't know how mineral processing works who haven't thought what the logistics require and don't care that entropy demands even minerals in stasis don't last forever. But it's ~new~ and the dollar signs on metallic asteroids gleam in their eyes and I want to take out Elon Musk's kneecaps.
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rnoonsetter Ā· 2 months ago
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discovered my true calling as the person to draw every version of virginia
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lemonisntreal Ā· 3 months ago
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The Sing: Thriller short is all a parody from the original Michael Jackson Thriller music video! I recommend checking it out, youā€™ll see how perfect it was!
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I am so dumb LMAO
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clegfly Ā· 5 months ago
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Getting REAL sick and tired of how omori TikTok views sunny.
Like, they view any scene of him being emotionally vulnerable, affectionate, or even just making an expression outside of just being completely neutral as ā€œmischaracterisedā€. Heā€™s not some cool, stoic, unwavering badass, he is a traumatised teenager. Donā€™t cry whenever he dares to give his friend a hug or (god forbid) be SAD about something??? Isnā€™t like. Part of the point of his development about him allowing himself to break down the repressive walls he built when he shut himself in? And being able to rely on his real friends instead of imaginary versions? And isnā€™t the game like. Meant to SHOW that he still cares about them despite isolating himself?
Itā€™s really stupid to get mad at a character like that showing emotion or affection personally, especially since heā€™s not used to expressing it properly after so long. But thatā€™s just me
#this isnā€™t even solely about the manga though it inspired me to make this post#any piece of official art in which sunny dares to show an emotion is shunned as ooc and Iā€™m sick of it#he only appears ā€˜neutralā€™ throughout the GAMEā€™s narrative because he HAS NO FACE SPRITES#because heā€™s the protagonist and has no actual dialogue#therefore he only makes a few expressions the entire game#obviously manga sunny is a good bit more expressive than canon sunny but#itā€™s REALLY not as bad as TikTok is making it out to be#Iā€™m so TIRED of this character being viewed as nothing but a rock that ONLY has personality before and the gameā€™s events#not allows to emote at all because ā€˜he didnā€™t do that in the game!!ā€™#because he is restricted to ONE face sprite the entire time outside of the battles#omori is a DIFFERENT case and I can admit that manga omori is a good bit more expressive than he should be but#heā€™s still VERY stoic especially compared to sunny#which is what is should be#sunny should be quite closed off but in contrast to omori so much more human#thatā€™s like. a massive part of their dynamic I feel#anyway this is such a long rant but god im so angry#Iā€™ve seen one too many people cry ā€˜mischaracterisedā€™ at a teenager expressing feelings#PLEASE stop it#also this is not to say you canā€™t critique manga sunnyā€™s portrayal#because there are a few issues I believe#which are honestly really hard to dance around considering the factors I mentioned before#about having one expression most of the game and two lines of dialogue the entire time#and honestly? I think they did a pretty okay job!#heā€™s still a silent protagonist but seeing him emote so often helps us see into his mind and know how heā€™s thinking much easier#both portrayals have their pros and cons and ultimately I prefer the gameā€™s portrayal#but thatā€™s not to say this version of sunny is terrible and ooc like people have been saying#and thatā€™s definitely not to say that any moment of emotional vulnerability he has is terrible and inaccurate#because thatā€™s. just terrible and untrue#omori#omori sunny
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marinsawakening Ā· 25 days ago
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The reason Links Meet AUs are so popular isn't rlly bc ppl like the idea of game crossover tbh. If it was Zeldas Meet AUs would be about as popular, which they are demonstratably not. The reason they're so popular is because it allows ppl to have interesting character interactions without even once having to think about anyone other than a white boy.
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wrongcaitlyn Ā· 6 months ago
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guys i got to see delos today and was fangirling over rocks
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cruesuffix Ā· 11 days ago
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oh man that music industry wife swap post got me thinking about Mick absolutely swamped by all the drummers (Steven Adler, Peter Criss, Eric Carr, Eric Singer <- sorry, it's gotta be all the Kiss drummers; and Tommy of course) literally surrounded on all sides by two cats, two puppies, and an adorable fox! <3
robinnnn what a cute sight to behold honestly!!!!!
the idea of mick surrounded by all these drummers, all piling around and curling up around him. like at first he thinks this is a punishment becauseā€¦ well he can barely handle one tommy as is, but now heā€™s surrounded by a bunch of golden retrieveresque drummers and heā€™s stuck. (i mean i know nothing about the kiss drummer so idk if theyā€™re all golden retriever drummers tbh butā€¦ iā€™ll pretend for now that they are) soon enough heā€™s warmed up to them and lets them lay around him and cozy up to him. maybe heā€™s the protector of happy go lucky sunshine drummers idkā€¦
(especially steven and tommy omg talk about the same person in two bodies. rocker band member swap with gnr and mc and mick quickly realizes how similar steven and tommy are and maybe it makes him homesick for his band. because stevenā€™s even younger than tommy, mick feels an urge to protect him and make sure heā€™s ok. even after the band swap is over heā€™s still trying to keep in touch with steven and make sure heā€™s okā€¦ aughhhhh gnr x mc crumbs for meeeee)
(also cue me imagining steven and tommy cuddled up together in micks lap, just two little golden retriever puppies needing their owners affectionā€¦ofc mick would start off hating it but soon heā€™s lapping up their attention and tenderly ruffling their hairā€¦.ok rocking back and forth time!!!)
thank you so much for giving me such a beautifully cute scenario to think about and kick my legs about robin aghhhhhhh!!!!! <3333
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basofy Ā· 1 year ago
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ive never talked about their dynamic but this is one of the many thoughts i have about them
#ive been having power outages all day help me#my stuff#lisa rpg#bo wyatt#lisa garth#lisa the painful#i imagine hes saying do you liiiiike it :) with a deep yet nerdy voice#ok deranged thoughts time#yes i in fact like them becuz theyre both artists#but heres the thing#theyre both STRUGGLING artists who have a very deep bond with their art which reflects who they are as people#they both also suck at it lol#yet they continue cuz their art is their life pretty much#and i like to think that having another artist buddy would feel nice for them#especially in garths case it's like dude lives pretty much under a rock feels ignored by everyone cares too much about others reactions etc#either it becomes some sorta onesided artist rivalry or he becomes obssesed with the fact that there is another guy in the team#who knows what it's like#he would be all like YOU. YOU UNDERSTAND!!! and bo is just like lol#becuz while he struggles too he doesnt make a big deal out of it doesnt care about being underappreciated#like garth who is A BIG ATTENTION SEEKER#so imagining them hanging out and having this weird artist bond is cool to me#id also include jack cuz they all make an artist team but yknow SIGHHHHH#also i have different thoughts on what does art mean for jack since hes younger#these are definitely not all of my thoughts i am insane about artist characters#and yeah it could be said gart in this post is trying to get bo's attention#through a mix of what bo likes and what garth likes and it's a funny and cute thought to me#lisa ramblings#still love this post#lisa artist team#bogarth
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sorry but rat a tat is the thesis of save rock and roll actually you guys just don't like Courtney Love
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