#but please clap im basically finished

[plulp]

waiting to get the go ahead for the last spulp (due to complications with the ask)! but once im finished i will take every common trait from all your pcs and combine them into one. effectively creating the ultimate dol pc.

[nomazee]

dabbling in a funky little high school au concept

[justauthoring]

all too easy.

requested! -> hello!! :D i've loved your fairy tail fics so far and wanted to know if you could write something for laxus? anything would be fine! thank you! -> can you write some laxus x reader fluff please requested by -> anonymous

a/n -> this was sitting unfinished in my drafts for too long and given that fairy tail is returning in a week basically i HAD to finish it (im still in disbelief my first anime is returning!)

pairing -> laxus dreyar x f!reader

"i have a proposition for you."

quirking a brow up at cana, you know instantly that the sly smile and the mischief dancing in her eyes is nothing good.

you loved cana. of course you did. she was part of your family and your friend, not to mention your teammate; but the girl seemed to get a particular kick out of teasing you. you were more often then not the target of her skeems, usually crafted after a few of her barrels were downed. however, being the resident alcoholic of fairy tail, cana's mind seemed to work better inebriated then it would for others.

so her proposition is regarded with hesitance, pulled away from your own thoughts to focus in on her. "...yes?" you ask softly, prompting her to finish and almost instantly she brightens, the smile turning genuine as she takes a seat at the table across from you.

your eyes fall on the barrel of alcohol she promptly drops beside her.

"i'll give you the full reward of our next mission if you drink with me."

okay... so that was certainly not what you were expecting.

brows furrowing, you shake your head. "that's... all?"

still grinning, cana nods. "that's it. i just want you to drink with me." she explains, tapping her barrell for added effect.

"why?" you ask instantly, not trusting how... simple her request. it's definitely a set up of some sort... the only problem is you can't figure out what or just what her angle is. "you've never asked me to drink with you before and we've known each other a long time so—"

"y/n?"

"yes?"

"i just want to drink with my best friend," she says, her voice oddly soft and sincere in a way that it normally never is. you knew cana cared, of course, but she was rarely ever this serious. "and i know you don't like drinking so im bribing you."

you pause, regarding her for a moment longer. you let your eyes drag across her, taking in her expression and trying to find some sort of hint that there was something beyond what she meant.

you couldn't find anything.

the guilt starts to well then. it seemed cana truly just wanted to have a drink with you and you think back to all the times you'd rather quickl denied her request. it never was more than just because you could not keep up with cana without getting incredibly drunk and you were... not a fun drunk to say the least.

but... you supposed a few drinks couldn't hurt.

"okay," you concede, nodding as you signal mira to bring the two of you some cups. "i'll drink with you."

cana lets out a whoop, her hand pumping the air and you watch on with a laugh, shaking your head.

-

it's not just a few drinks.

it's practically her whole barrel and before you know it, you're thoroughly drunk. your words slur and your movements are jagged, you're not even fully conscious of what you're saying or doing; all you know is that you're having fun and there's not a single care in regard to anything else.

somewhere along the way, as to be expected, other members of the guild started to join in the fun. wakaba and macao were the first, then team natsu returned from a mission and of course, natsu was quick to join in the celebration. he'd tugged lucy and happy with him and gray, erza and wendy trailed behind.

with them came the rest.

the whole guild was in an uproar and you were basking the full of it.

completely unaware of the eyes watching you quietly, you linked arms with cana, the both of you singing loudly, out of pitch and without a single care in the world. some of the guild members watched on in amusement, clapping and cheering the both of you on.

you'd ended up on a table without meaning to, dancing around without watching your step. it takes five minutes before you inevitably trip, stepping back only for your foot to land on nothing, and feel yourself slipping back as your arm slips from cana.

you register that you're falling but you're inebriated state leaves you unable to catch yourself, a gasp of surprise leaving your lips as you wait to slam into the floor beneath you. your eyes squeeze shut in anticipation, but...

but you never hit the ground.

instead, you're enveloped in warmth. arms catch you, wrapping around your back and under your knees as you're held against a firm chest. with a gasp, you open your eyes, only to see laxus looming over you, eyes flickering across you as if assessing you for any injuries.

"laxus!"

his name leaves your lips in a squeal of surprise and it seems the commotion of everything caught the attention of the guild as there's cheers called out for laxus' save and a few whistles that has your cheeks burning.

you expect laxus to let you go, but he just stands up straight, still silent and still holding you close to him. his eyes flicker across the rest of the guild and then he's turning, making his way to the guild doors—with you.

"aw! laxus! don't ruin all the fun!"

it's cana who calls out, voice pitching and loud but laxus just shakes his head, never faltering in his step, opening the guild doors and letting them fall shut behind him. the chaos of the guild grows muffled and instead instantly, and you're left out in the cool magnolia air, only then realizing how late it had gotten.

"where... where are we going?" you ask tentatively, unsure of your own voice and hating the way your words still slightly slur.

"i'm taking you home."

you nod, more to yourself than anything. nearly falling had taken you from your stupor slightly but your mind was still jumbled and you could clearly feel the effects of alcohol coarsing through your system; it didn't help that it was laxus that had caught you or that you were alone with him.

for as long as you can remember you've had a raging crush on him.

being apart of the guild since you were a little girl, you'd had a schoolgirl crush on laxus; it was a mix of the fact that he was older and you'd been enamoured with his magic. only, you never really grew out of it. even when he'd done his attack on fairy tail, your heart had been in a state of conflict between your feelings and the cruel actions he'd done.

and when he'd been kicked out? you'd been distraught; only to be ecstatic when he returned that day on tenrou island. sure, it had been followed by being asleep for seven years, but regardless, laxus had returned and it seemed with it his attitude had changed.

while he'd never been cruel to you, you'd spent most of your time watching him with adoring eyes. but when you'd all returned from tenrou, there was a noticeable difference in laxus. he was still quiet and he did tend to stick to himself, but where he'd been cruel and crude before, he was awkward and endearing. he was considerably kinder and the two of you had even grown closer in the passing months since.

needless to say, that schoolgirl crush had grown into a fullout 'i-like-you-so-much-i-can't-fuction-around-you' crush.

so, clearly, you were freaking out.

it takes you a moment to realize you're still in his arms, wrapped securely around your waist and the blush deepens as you hastily worm your way out of his grasp, pushing against his chest. the action causes laxus to halt in surprise, turning to glance down at you with parted lips as you frantically wave your hands in front of you.

"i-i can walk home on my own," you rush out, words still clearly slurring. "i me-mean, thank you for catching me but you don't need to... you don't need walk me home. i don't want to be a bother."

there's a beat of silence, then; "you're not a bother."

and you blink, stunned, eyes flickering up to meet his calm and steady ones.

"i don't mind," he clarifies, the words somewhat awkward. are his cheeks red or are you just imagining that? "i... i want to make sure you get home safe."

"oh."

you regret the second you say it, feeling like a complete fool as your cheeks burn and you stare back at him like an idiot.

blinking, you force yourself to speak; "o-okay, then."

you turn and he follows and then the two of you are walking again. it's awkwardly silent and you're mentally cursing yourself because it wasn't like this was the first time you've ever been alone with laxus so why can't you think of anything to say? you want to blame it on your inebriated state but you know that isn't completely it.

his words, though probably not meant by anything more, of wanting you to get home safe is getting to your heart and making your heart race—and that is making your brain short circuit on what to say.

you're so lost in your own thoughts you aren't watching when you're stepping and for the second time that night you lose your balance, tripping and tipping forward as your vision blurs.

this time you're sure you're going to fall but you forget that laxus isn't a s-class ranked wizard for nothing, and his reflexes allow him to slip his arm around your waist with ease. once again you feel you back press against his firm and warm chest, and you're positive you might pass out.

"maybe i should just carry you."

you blink, wide eyes turning to face laxus and you're even further surprised to see the small grin on his face at his own teasing.

"i-i..." but no words leave your lips because you have no argument. "sorry..."

laxus just shakes his head but before you can say anything more, he's shifting, his arm slipping underneath the bend of your knees and your axis is tilted as he lifts you into his arms, bridle style.

"oh!"

he shuffles, making sure you're properly in his arms before meeting your gaze; "this okay?"

letting out a shaky breath, you don't dare try to speak—knowing you'll only make more of a fool of yourself—and nod with burning cheeks.

the rest of the walk goes pretty uneventful from there. you don't live far from the guild so laxus reaches your small apartment with ease having been there before when returning from a mission that you and cana had joined laxus' team for. you'd moved out of the fairy apartments a while ago because although you loved the girls, having a space to your own was something you'd desperately needed.

you're more than thankful for that in this moment cause you don't think you could handle the embarrassment of any of the girls seeing laxus carry you home.

you hand him your key when you reach your door and instead of leaving the second he's set you down inside, you're pleasantly surprised by how laxus stays.

swallowing thickly, you shuffle in front of him; "once again, thank you. for-for everything."

laxus' eyes fall on you, nodding; "of course." then, after a moment, he adds; "i... uh, was surprised to see you drunk. you normally don't join cana on her bad habits."

tucking a strand of hair behind your ears, you glance at your feet; "yeah... definitely learnt my lesson for that one."

laxus pauses; "i mean... i wouldn't mind if it meant i got to be the one to walk you home."

you're sure you misheard that. had... had laxus just been flirting?

turning to him, your lips part; "what?"

this time you're sure his cheeks are red.

"you're cute drunk," is what he says, stunning you further. "it bothered me how some of the other guys there were eyeing you so when i saw you fall, i... well, made sure i was the one to catch you."

he promptly avoids your gaze all while he speaks, rubbing the back of his neck and cheeks as flushed as yours.

"o-oh..." you mumble, before cursing yourself. stupid you and stupid brain for shortcircuting. "i-i mean... are you saying what i think you're saying?"

slowly, laxus' eyes shift to yours.

"yeah..." he breathes, "especially if you feel the same."

for the first time you're thankful for your inebriated state that gives you the courage to close the small distance between the two of you and promptly press your lips against laxus'. you fall against him with a swoosh, hands wrapping around his neck as you let your eyes flutter shut, sinking into him further the second he tugs you closer by the waist.

it's exactly like you always hoped it would be and you can hardly believe you're kissing him even as his lips slant against your own.

a moment later, breathless, you pull away, chest rising and falling with laxus' as he cups the back of your head and meets your gaze.

your eyes flicker from his eyes back to his lips.

"we-we shouldn't."

and at first you're panicked, heart stopping momentarily, but laxus is smiling in a way you've never seen before (and a way that takes you breath away) and shakes his head; "i don't want our first time to be while you're drunk. i have no doubt of my feelings, but i want you to be sober."

could your heart possibly swoon anymore?

biting your lip, you smile, wide; "at least spend the night?"

laxus grins; "of course."

-

"so... did you and laxus have a good night?"

eyes zoning in on cana, you frown; "what does that mean?"

shrugging, with her regular barrel in between her legs, "nothing," she says, playing it off nonchalantly. "just, you two left together last night and came to the guild this morning together. it's a bit suspicious, don't you think?"

you stare at her for a moment longer, taking in her grin and the twinkle of mischief in her eyes and promptly gasp; "you got me drunk on purpose!"

cana glances away; "i have no idea what you're talking about!"

"yes, you do!" you accuse, pointing your finger at her. "you wanted me to make a fool of myself... so... so what? laxus would come in and help?"

cana scoffs; "the two of you were ridiculous. always making heart-eyes at each other," she laughs. "i had to step in. for you, of course."

rolling your eyes, you stare at her in disbelief.

staring past you, cana just grins; "it worked didn't it?"

and you're confused at first, until a hand settles on your shoulder and you glance up to meet laxus' familiar and soft look.

"hey," he smiles and for all his talk of being tough, it seems even he can't fight the lovesick grin off his face.

a quick glance at cana tells you she's drinking her victory in, but really, you can't be all that angry when you see the way laxus is looking at you.

[fireflyinks]

ooc ep with mandy hamzah and martin then hamzah introduces u as his gf 👀👀 twitter insta tiktok etc is going crazyyyy abt it too

girlfriend reveal (hamzah edition)

hamzah x reader

a/n : not sure if i love or hate this but here it is!! sorry i haven’t been as active I SWEAR im trying to get to your requests!! this was such a good idea and lmk if you want me to write a version but with y/n being a content creator as well. much love!

contains : a little fluff, slight cursing (literally just bs), cuteness, hard launching

I rocked back and fourth on my heels, standing directly beside the camera’s view. Anticipation and nervousness swirled in my stomach.

It probably wasn’t as big of a deal as I was making it, I knew that, but my nerves were still going buck-wild.

After three months of dating, Hamzah was introducing me as his girlfriend on the podcast today. We both wanted to wait until it was the right time, and we had finally decided that it was now or never.

YouTube was a ginormous part of Hamzah’s life, so the thought of his fans not approving of me was a big fear of mine. He’d assured me that they would love me, but I knew that he couldn’t be sure of that fact.

After about three minutes of rambling on about something pointless, Hamzah finally cleared him throat.

“We also have a special guest this episode. Please welcome, my beautiful girlfriend, y/n.”

I walked into frame, sitting beside Hamzah on the already crowded couch. Mandy and Martin clapped at my entrance, and I giggled nervously. This was a weird feeling for me, since I normally wasn’t this shy.

Hamzah handed me a mic he had bought specially for this episode, since normally they only had three people on at a time and didn’t own a fourth mic. He also put an arm around me, which helped calm my nerves a small bit. Hamzah’s touch could almost always make me feel better. I guess it was a good thing then that I was basically sitting on his lap due to limited space on the yellow couch.

“Hello,” I spoke into the microphone, smiling sheepishly.

“Introduce yourself.” Hamzah encouraged. He was taken aback by my shy demeanor as well.

“I’m y/n, Hamzah’s girlfriend…” I racked my brain for other facts about myself, but nothing came to mind.

Mandy chimed in, “We finally managed to get Hamzah a girlfriend guys, this is a rare sighting.”

I laughed along with Mandy and Martin, and Hamzah just rolled his eyes.

“You did not manage anything, I got her myself.”

“Bullshit, I’m the one who introduced you two.”

It was true, Mandy and I had worked together for about a year now and she was constantly telling me about how I needed to meet Hamzah, how well we would get along. Finally, she planned a night for us all to hang out, and we just kind of clicked.

“Yeah, Mandy is actually a really good match maker.” I nodded.

Mandy shrugged, “You are both socially awkward so I thought you’d be perfect for one another. And I was right, of course.”

Some time went on, and my nerves slowly started to dissolve. After about an hour, we finished filming, and Hamzah drove me home.

“So…” he began, looking out at the road as he drove, “how’d you feel about that?”

I shrugged, “I was really nervous at first but I think it turned out okay.”

Hamzah placed his hand on my thigh, “I promise, you have nothing to worry about. Everyone will love you.”

—

Hamzah posted the video the next day, and I couldn’t get myself to read the comments or open any social media until I got home from work, five hours later.

I sighed, sitting down on my couch and fumbling with my phone, opening YouTube and pressing on the new episode, entitled “Girlfriend Reveal (Hamzah Edition)”, which happened to the first video on my feed. The intro music began to play.

There were already 500 comments.

awww they’re literally perfect for eachother ❤️

where is the Hamzah to my Y/n

the way hamzah looks at her…

I couldn’t help but smile to myself as I read the kind comments.

I commented a quick heart on the video before moving on to TikTok. My feed was already mostly slushy noobz clips, so I wasn’t surprised when I was the first thing I saw after opening the app.

It was the clip of Hamzah introducing me as I tried to fit next to them on the small couch, with “Margeret” by Lana Del Rey playing in the background softly. The comments were just as positive as the ones on YouTube.

OMG?

wait she’s like genuinely so pretty

they’re so socially awkward together, it’s perfect

Last but not least was Twitter, which scared me the most. I knew that if anyone would have a problem with me, they would most likely express it on Twitter.

I opened the app, and went to search, to be met with “Hamzah’s New Girlfriend” trending. This was either a very good thing or an extremely bad thing.

I clicked on it, and began reading some of the tweets under the hashtag.

hamzah’s new girlfriend is literally so gorgeous, im actually obsessed with the two of them together

hamzah’s new girlfriend genuinely seems so sweet, my heartttt 🥹🥹🥹

“thank you mandy”, we say in unison, hamzah and his new gf are literally PERFECT

Suddenly, there was a quick knock at the door. I got up to answer, wondering who it was. Hamzah was filming a video with Martin and Mandy had told me earlier that she was getting her nails done after our shift.

I opened the door, being met with a bouquet full of colorful assorted flowers. My heart felt as if it could burst. I picked them up, grabbing the paper tag on them to read it.

I knew they would love you - Hamzah

⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✩°｡⋆˚⁺

[braxlrose]

breeding kink with bill.

please I BEGGG🤞

like literally im drooling just thinking about it

bill w/ a breeding kink

cw: breeding kink obviously, degradation, praise kink, etc.

• bill totally has a breeding kink, I can't imagine bill without a breeding kink. he loves kids and he loves the idea of having kids with you even more.

• whenever you two have sex, you usually use condoms because bill likes finishing while he's inside of you but you guys aren't ready for kids and you guys have decided that since that's how your lives are right now.

• but if you guys decide for you to go on birth control (yall if you're shifting, either script you only get pregnant when you want too, or birth control has no bad side effects cuz have yall seen the side effects 😨) he doesn't use a condom.

• and honestly, it's like 10x better. you get to feel everything like this and he literally gets obsessed with finishing deep inside of you. pulling out and seeing his cum leak out of you. your fucked out face after you two screw like no tomorrow. he loves it all.

• literally tons of dirty talk.

• "fuck sweetie, you look so pretty like this? want me to make you a momma? Huh? Is that what you want, pretty?"

• " 'm gonna fill up this slutty little pussy...sound good to you, schatzi? Want me to fill you up?"

• "you look so sexy underneath me, how about I stuff this cunt nice and full, hmm?"

• and this man looks so sexy on top of you, pounding into you, rubbing your clit like crazy.

• idk if you guys ever saw this, but it was on a live one time and tom said he was like proud of bill because he fucked a girl for 4 hours 😭 I don't remember what live it was but holy shit. that's basically what it's like with bill.

• he overstimulates himself and you. he never wants to pull out, even if he's just fucking away into you, his cum pushing out of your pretty little cunt every time he thrusts into you, his cock going in between hard and semi hard from how long you two have been fucking.

• if you guys decide to try for a baby, Jesus christ. You won't be able to walk. I'm serious. not that you have to worry because bill will carry you everywhere.

• after he finishes in you, he stays inside you for a little bit so nothing leaks out.

• talks about having a family with you all the time, especially at night when you two are spooning and sleepy. he'll just be talking away about where you two will live, the kids names, how many kids you'll have, etc.

• he's the type of guy to be like "Oh yeah, were trying so hard for baby." with a shit-eating grin on his face because he knows exactly what people are thinking when you say that kind of stuff.

• when you wake up one morning and he's cooking breakfast for you, and he sees you run to the bathroom and hears you puke. he obviously feels really bad for you and comes to your aid, but he's also super happy just in case this means your pregnant.

• he gets super excited when he finds out you are pregnant. like he's jumping around, clapping his hands, picking you up. everything.

• bill is a girl dad and nothing can change my mind about that.

taglist: @hearts4kaulitz @burntb4bydoll @spelaelamela @bored0writer @fishinaband @billsleftnutt @tokiiohot @bluepoptartwithsprinkles @saumspam @5hyslv7 @killed-kiss @memog1rl @80s-tingz

[just-some-random-blogger]

Hey! Hope you're having a fab day <3 I came across your lil Daemon/Matt 'crackfic' and it gave me such a giggle...plus also got me thinking about a similar scene with Aemond/Ewan..! Obviously no pressure to write this, but what about a sorta Aemond x reader scene where they're maybe filming a sparring scene? Fight training/flirting vibes? Doesn't have to be anything spicy, maybe just fluffy flirty good times but also realistically aemond x reader sparring = *sexual tension* so lol, take from it what you will. As I say, no pressure at all to write this. I love your blog so much and am such a fan of your work! Wishing you a wonderful weekend xoxo

Choke 'Em

Ewan Mitchell x Actress!Reader (low key Aemond x Reader)

Summary: You and Tom were very much convinced that Ewan is good at everything, so you had a bet that even if you took Ewan surprise in one of your sparring takes, he could 100% overpower you. Things don't necessarily go as planned.

Word Count: 1k+

Warnings: fem!reader, drama instigator!tom glynn-carney, puppy!ewan, idk how to choreograph action 😞, fluff, typos, etc.

A/N: YES IN A MILLLION LANGUAGEs, i watched like this one of 3 actors from the last kingdom saying they think ewan is good at everything or something along the lines, and then theres this gif set of tom glynn-carney saying that he was going to bite ewan and ewan was basically "aw yeah!" and ASFHLASHFHASFHFHA PUPPY im love him, anyway, i had those stuff in mind when i wrote this i hope you like it my love floofdeloop. i did an express pass on your req cos i have been writing rpfs lol also this gif T_T HES SO ??????????? HOT ????? HELP ME WHY DO I THINK THIS OF HIM ???? HWELP? Tagging: @pinksirensong @deniixlovezelda

"No!" I exclaim, shoving Tom from the floor we were sat on. He nearly chokes on his salad as he falls to his side and laughs. His hand darts out to keep him upright, his laughter dies down when he turns to me.

I continue, "I can't attack him outside of the choreography we practiced!"

"I'm not telling you to do that!" Tom says, raising his voice in amusement, "I'm saying maybe just-" he breathes out through his nose, "go a bit harder than normal? Or-or add a few licks to-"

"Tom," I deadpan.

"Oh, please," he blows a raspberry, "against him? You're dead meat."

"He's not immune to accidents, lame brain," I take the final bites of my sandwich.

"All I'm saying is, Ewan is probably, like, secretly a swordsman."

"Dude," I point, "there's nothing secret about that."

I look out to the set, watching as Ewan, who quickly finished his lunch to rebuff on our choreography, twist the prop sword in his hands with much ease and mastery.

I chew slowly, "maybe I could tell him I'm doing extra attacks beforehand."

Tom, who stuffed some salad into his face as he too watched Ewan from afar, turns to me, perking up in intrigue. He speaks with a mouthful quite excitedly, "yes, yes, yeth, weth!"

I give him a look then purse my lips as I shove a tissue to his mouth

When we got to filming the dialogue part of our scene, we already set a pretty high bar for our consequential fight sequence, and so when I offered the idea of adding an extra few jabs in my sword fighting, not just to Ewan, but to our fight choreographer and director, they were all on board with it.

"I was thinking I could," I start, raising my imaginary weapon up, pointing at Ewan, "try to jab at you by your throat, then," I slowly step forward, twirling the way we did in practice, "once you evade me, I could elbow you," I bring my arm by his chest and slowly push him back, "and shove you against the wall."

Ewan, following my train of thought and movements, steps back and leans back on the wall. He nods, looking down at me with a soft smile, "I like it," he turns to the choreographer, "I think it adds to their tension."

I turn to our choreographer and director, nodding, "then we could add the dialogue we scraped off cause there was no room for it."

The director claps his hands, "I love it," he motions to us, "then you can grab her, and try to make her confess."

I turn to Ewan, leaning back into him a bit so that he could bring his arms around me. I turn front then look down at his arms that were coming around me. I pull him tightly around me like a jacket.

Ewan has no choice but to lean into me; my back was against his chest and I could hear his breathing. He was a welcome presence in all honesty. Quickly, I relax against him and he seemingly does the same against me.

"Well obviously not like that," the director calls, "you look like a married couple if you do that."

We break into a laugh. I lean against him, "it's not too late to change the script. She and Aemond could away together."

Ewan hums, as though he was in character, "I think he would like that."

I snort, turning to Ewan and his eyepatch, "I would like that."

Ewan's eye darts down to me quickly. He purses his lips, holding back a chuckle. I pull away from him when I see the pink in his skin, laughing a bit louder.

"Shall we give it a go?" the director asks.

One nod later, and were back in our marks, ready to tryout our added choreo.

"You lied to me," I heave, "you told me you would release my father if I gave you the information you needed.

Aemond walks over to me, hands behind his back, "I said I would think about releasing your father."

My expression drops, my nostrils flare, "liar."

He hums.

"Craven!"

He chuckles.

"MONSTER!" I lunge towards him and the next second, Aemond has his sword unsheathed. We go against each other, weapon against weapon, then he overpowers me, sending me reeling back. I push against the crates behind me, as the prince calls out, "let me offer you another deal you surely cannot refuse."

I fume, groaning, "I think we're past deals, oh prince."

"Oh, but I-"

Aemond's eye widens as I press forward a few lines too early. Like clockwork, I attack him just like we practiced earlier, except, he was clearly taken off guard and reacts a bit too late.

Once I have him pressed against he wall, he looks down at me, shocked, heaving.

He's forgotten his line.

I make up for his silence, "perhaps you are prettier up close."

"CUT!"

I pull away from Ewan, turning to him, dropping my prop. I reach out to his cheeks, giving him a worried look, "are you okay? I didn't injure you, did I?"

"I-" his hands come up to my wrists, "no, no," he chuckles under his breath, "I was just a bit floored by how fearsome my lady is."

My face contorts into a smile, "my lady, am I?"

"I-" he opens his mouth, "well, I mean... yes."

We both break into a chuckle. It seems we both had blood rising up our necks now.

"That was amazing!" the director calls, walking up to us, making us pull away, "I like these turn of events more than what we had planned."

"What if they have more contact?" Ewan pipes up, coming in front of me, "in this part, instead of being turned back," he looks at me intently, "you can lift your sword to my neck then choke me."

I gasp when he takes my hand and places it by the base of his throat. It was quite softly spoken, but it seems it was not soft enough, "damn, that's kinky."

Ewan's jaw slacks.

I break into a chuckle, playing it off, just as the director laughs, proceeding to say, "I like it! The more sexual tension the better." He turns to me, "choke him real good."

Ewan begins to stutter. My own jaw slacks as I feel my face heat up. I awkwardly nod and salute, "will do."

[mrs-saturday]

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*Start Of Something New˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

Twinkle Towne (An F1 X High School Musical AU!)

♥ my masterlist!

♥ pairing: george russell x fem!reader, platonic!rest of grid x reader

♥ synopsis: New years parties, chalets and karaoke... Is this the start of something new for up-and-coming driver George Russell and maths genius Y/N L/N?

♥ warnings: nada, no warnings here bbys

♥ a/n: tysm for all your amazing love, support and kindness on my work! all the likes and kind reblogs and convos I have with you all over asks mean so so much to me, and im glad people are enjoying my work! TT is a purely self indulgent fic, but I hope you'll grow to love her as much as I do! Enjoy the show!

You had always hated these FIA New Years parties, and this year was NO exception. Every year it was the same old chalet in the alps, with the same old music and the same old countdowns to the new year with a load of young drivers. You weren’t even a driver yourself, it just happened that your father, Sebastian Vettel, was like the it girl of driving, so you basically HAD to go to all these parties.

“Leibe, please, at least try and have some fun” your father begged you as he walked you down the hallway to the party for under 18’s. You huffed a little, and felt grateful you’d managed to smuggle a copy of your favourite book in that little baguette bag slung from your shoulder. “You never know, maybe you will meet someone at this party, I know Lew-” You cut your father off with a small laugh and smile “I’ll try Vati, but I’m not going to go about looking for one of your friend’s cute sons! I have to focus on school if I’m going to go to Princeton!”  You cracked a glowy smile at your father and he laughed back, smoothing your hair down with his hands, before giving you a stern look. “Y/N, hand the book over.” You pouted, about to attempt a denial, but when Seb raised his eyebrow, you relented and handed your copy of ‘My Brilliant Friend’ over to your dad, as he kissed your forehead and headed off to the party. 

Meanwhile, over at the karting track nearby, George was whizzing around in his coach Lewis’ old go-kart, with Lewis cheering him on from near where the pitwall usually was. “WHOO! GO RUSSELL! WHAT A LAP KIDDO!!” he claps as the younger boy pulled up to the finish line, detaching the steering wheel so he could jump out. As he ran and hi-fived his coach, a sharp cough filled the air. Valtteri, Lewis’ old teammate and the other man on this trip with them, was stood with his arms folded and a stern expression on his face. “Boys, it is New Years Eve, please can you stop training for one evening and go shower up?” He sighed, walking over to Lewis “Why are you all suited and booted, Bottas?” Lewis laughed, and Valterri gave the boys a little spin “The party, Lewis. George, there’s a kids party downstairs as well!” George scrunched his face up at the Finnish man, now with his blue helmet tucked under a lanky arm.”Young adult party” he corrected himself with a sigh, looking between both Lewis and George. “We didn’t fly all this way for you guys to race the whole time. We can do that at home.” Both the Mercedes boys hung their heads and nodded, walking off to their chalet to get cleaned up for parties they didn’t want to be at.

At the kids young adults party, cheesy pop music blared over the speakers as teens from all over the racing series played games, talked, laughed and ate. Esteban and Pierre were arguing over a foosball table, Yuki was eating every sandwich he could find, and Lando was DJing a load of karaoke over a headset and mic in his DJ merch. Kimi and Ollie, two Formula 2 drivers, had just finished up a duet of “I Wanna Dance With Somebody’ by Whitney Houston, as the crowd clapped. You ignored the roar of the music and laughed, sat on a couch, watching everything unfold in front of you, while pulling the blue cardigan your Vati had bought for you up over your shoulders, ready to make your escape. “Not bad for a couple of drivers, huh?” Lando hollered, messing with his lighting rig a little.

“Now, who’s gonna rock the house next next?” he asked, jumping up on a small box to scan the room better, as you struggled to think what to do, and he moved his light towards the doorway of the room. George quickly covered his face with his arm, yet felt himself dragged by another driver up to a small stage, and having a microphone thrust into his hands. You were dragged up too, a microphone flung at you, almost slipping out of your sweaty hands. How on earth could this happen to you!? Or this awfully attractive boy you’re now stood next toYou looked up at the taller man, both confused as each other, the sheen of  teenage awkwardness covering both of your foreheads.

“Y’know, you guys might thank me for this later” Lando winks, to the reception of an unimpressed you and George. He slinks back behind the DJ rig and sighs “Or not…” and starts the track. You and the boy stare at each other as the opening piano notes play. You were more so staring at those beautiful blue eyes, connecting the freckles across his nose like constellations, looking at his perfectly formed cupids bow, when all of a sudden-

“Living in my own world

Didn't understand

That anything can happen

When you take a chance”

Oh boy, he has the face and voice of an angel. You made the decision quick and pulled the microphone to your lips ready for your part. There went nothing…

“I never believed in What I couldn't see

I never opened my heart (Oh)

To all the possibilities”

George felt his heart skip beats, the sound of his pulse rushing through his ears and the blood into his face. Thump-thump, thump-thump. Not only did this random girl he’d been pulled into some sort of karaoke fanfiction with LOOK like a princess, but she had the most beautiful voice and the confidence to actually sing with him. He had never believed in love at first sight, but he thought, perhaps love at first note could be real.

“I know that something has changed

Never felt this way, and right here tonight

This could be the start of something new

It feels so right to be here with you (oh)

And now looking in your eyes

I feel in my heart (feel in my heart)

The start of something new”

You loosed up a little, taking the claw clip out of your hair and letting it flow freely, framing your face and making George flush a baby pink in the cheeks.

Thump-thump, thump-thump

His pulse quickened as you moved closer, hips gently swaying to the sweet sound of your harmonies, and he tried to keep himself in check as the song progressed. 

“Now who'd have ever thought that

We'd both be here tonight

And the world looks so much brighter

With you by my side

I know that something has changed

Never felt this way

I know it for real”

You just glowed as you sung, sort of enjoying the anonymity of no one in the room seeming to recognise you, despite your father’s name. And George could tell you glowed, he spent all your solo parts scanning your frame, to find not a single flaw in his eyes. You were some sort of fairytale princess, singing him these sweet siren songs and making him forget the stress of the track, of Coach Hamilton’s emphasis on the upcoming races, and of his entire career as a racer. 

It was you. him, and the music.

“This could be the start of something new

It feels so right to be here with you (oh)

And now looking in your eyes

I feel in my heart

The start of something new”

And unbeknownst to him, you felt the same. No more swirling equations in your head, no more maths tests or Princeton or college entrance papers. Just this mysterious young man with the floppy curtains, slender frame, and glassiest blue eyes. And his voice, dulcet and warm, like ginger and honey tea on a winter’s morning. You pondered Lando’s words in your head:

 “Y’know, you guys might thank me for this later”

And thought, maybe he was right. Maybe you would.

“I never knew that it could happen till it happened to me

I didn't know it before

But now it's easy to see

It's the start of something new

It feels so right to be here with you

And now looking in your eyes I feel in my heart

That it's the start of something new

It feels so right to be here with you

And now looking in your eyes I feel in my heart

The start of something new (The start of something new)

The start of something new”

The music faded out as you and George stood looking into each other's eyes, a cheer spreading across the room, accompanied by the sound of claps and hollers from the crowd of teens. He smiled, and ran his hand through his hair “George. And you?” You smile back, blinking softly and quietly responding “Y/N”

You both found yourself sat outside after a while, escaping the music an the dancing just before midnight, “You were AMAZING Y/N!” The Brit, as you had learned from the accent, enthused. “You gotta be a singer, surely?” You chuckle, and follow his lead, guided by his soft hands, to a balcony “Only church choir, and even then I almost fainted!” The Brit laughed, and blushed at the gentle grip of your hand, feeling the edge of your nail dig into his vein ever so slightly. “Well, you were amazing, Y/N” He chirps, standing with you, overlooking the snowy mountains to the tune of faded voices, and the low whirr of the ski lift in the distance.

As you both looked over the balcony, George turned and grabbed his phone out of his pocket, still talking as he did so “So, Y/N, I was wondering if I could get your numb-” He trailed off as he looked up, only to realise you had vanished while he was pulling his phone out. Not that you’d wanted to, of course. But you’d promised your father you’d be back in the cabin by midnight, so you’d slinked away while George was distracted, the thought of your new school year buzzing in your mind. Besides, it’s not like you’d see the handsome stranger again. 

Right?

[sheikfangirl]

Positively adore your art!! Thank you for sharing it!! Also, would you happen to know of any fics that sort of resemble your art style or ones that inspired it? I’m right there with you I love the basic vanilla vibe and I have been trying to find a decent fic to get into before I finish totk

thank you!!

Thank you so much for your kind words for my art

🙏 I greatly appreciate!🙏

I have a confession to make dear friend! I hadn't read fanfictions in several years but beating Totk made me go FERAL for Zelda material and explore what's been written since BotW came out.... oh boy the rabbit hole is deep!

There is a lot of good stuff out there but I have read so many fanfics in a short time that the whole thing is a blurry mess in my brain. BUT! There is one in particular that really stood out and left a lasting impression on me: Displaced written by socksock https://archiveofourown.org/works/21128084/chapters/50279321 It was originally written in 2018, before the release of TotK so there are some small and harmless inconsistencies that can easily be ignored because, duh, it was written BEFORE totk. I particularly liked this fanfic because it has all the qualities I'm looking for!! Also several key moments and general ideas in that story are extremely close to my own headcanon to the point it almost scared me. The story focuses on Zelda trying to find her place in post-calamity Hyrule. The characters are very well written and credible, Link's personality is player behavior accurate (MORE OF THAT PLEASE!!!!!!!!) and obsessed with completing his quests backlog and I thought it was amazing. Damn i love a player accurate Link!!

It's a wholesome slow burn romance, lots of humor, it's sexy, does not take itself too seriously but can be very emotional at times. Also, I was amazed by one scene in particular....I don't want to spoil anything for you, but the Big Damn Kiss moment is *CHEF KISS*: the setting, the tone and the resolution HSGDKJS, I would've slow clapped if i could've (I was holding my phone lol)

Reading that scene, I thought to myself : F*** YES! This person gets it hahaha !!

My own Zelink Big Damn First Kiss moment shares a lot of similarities with that fic so, Im going to say it now: when 'll post the Zelink first kiss i'm currently crafting, be sure to know that Socksock and their fic Displaced did something in the same general vibe FIRST! They are awesome. I hope i answered your question haha Have a great day!

[connieluvsr]

ONE OF THE GIRLS | part 3

pairing: (electric) guitarist!jungkook x singer!reader(f)

genre: band au, enemies to lovers, fluff, angst

summary: when your main guitarist gets sick and can't perform at your show, you get help from someone unexpected.

warnings: swearing and some making out, hot jk:)), drinking, mention of drugs, smoking, slight smut, angst, reader is complicated.

word count: 6.9k

a/n: FINALLY after 2 months of not posting. i swear i want too many things to happen in this series but still didn’t know what to write. im so sorry for you waiting that long, please enjoy this chapter!

__________

"Woo! Amazing!" Avery's claps echoed through the room as she leaped onto the plush leather couch, sending vibrations that jolted Zac into a celebratory dance.

The much-anticipated day of the show was drawing near, and we had been tirelessly rehearsing. Despite everyone's praises, I felt there was always room for improvement.

"I'm utterly drained. Let's call it a day," I declared, collapsing onto the couch next to Avery and Zac.

"Are you sure? You practically begged me for extra rehearsal hours," Jungkook teased, concern etched on his face.

"My throat feels like it's on fire, and my head is pounding," I confessed, my voice hoarse and tired.

Avery gently rubbed my back, suggesting, "Take some Strepsils; you'll be fine."

Zac stood up, nodding in agreement. "Should we head out?"

"Yeah, let's go," Avery chimed in, following Zac toward the door. "Bye, guys!"

As they left, we waved our goodbyes, and I closed my eyes, sinking back into the couch. Suddenly, I felt Jungkook's presence beside me.

"Are you okay?" he inquired, his voice laced with concern.

"Yeah, why?" I replied, meeting his gaze with weary eyes that threatened to shut at any moment.

He sighed, clearly sensing something was amiss. "I feel like you're not telling me something."

"Do I have to spill every detail of my life to you?" I snapped, my exhaustion making me unusually irritable.

He looked taken aback, his confusion evident. "No, I didn't mean—" Before he could finish his sentence, he stops. He looks at me with such sad eyes. "Get some sleep. Talk to me when your eyes aren't threatening to close on their own," he retorted, his words sharper than intended. He hesitated for a moment, as if wanting to say something more, but eventually, he stood up and silently closed the door behind him. I let out a heavy sigh and covered my eyes with my palms, hoping to find a moment of peace amidst the chaos.

He knew you’re not being yourself, you kept the distance a lot more these days since what happend with Ander, everyone noticed, including Avery, who wanted to hang out but you politely declined everytime with another made-up excuse. You don’t want to sing — you mean you can’t sing with someone else, It’s not … what you’re used with. You hate new, you want the ordinary, the basic you’ve been doing.

Jungkook’s an amazing singer, you know it and he knows it too, but everytime you step into the practice room, a knot tightened in my stomach, you know how much he wants to help you and you know how much you need him, so you let him, but deep down you think about Ander and how quick he left and you’ve got someone else.

His voice resonated with passion and talent, filling the room with melodies that should have comforted me. Instead, they only intensified my insecurity. I compared every note he sang to the echoes of Ander’s notes, the memory of our duets haunting me like a ghost.

Did Ander try to contact you? Well His messages were filled with empty apologies, excuses that felt like salt on my wounds. I blocked him on all platforms, so he sent pointless emails.

The clock says 04:55, I found myself tossing and turning in bed, unable to shake off the tension from earlier. Unable to bear the suffocating feeling inside, I quietly slipped out of my room, barely seeing anything, I put on one of my hoodies and leave the house in the hushed darkness of the night.

The cool night air brushed against my skin as I walked aimlessly, trying to clear my mind. The city was silent, so, so, silent.

It was cold outside, I was in some Hello Kitty PJ’s and a hoodie that barely makes me warm, but I keep walking until I don’t feel the cold anymore.

The sun will rise in about half an hour now.

You wanna wait for it, making sure you’ll see it clearly, you go to the park that’s some miles away.

Suddenly, a cute dog start following you, you crouch down to him to pet him and he start licking you, gross but cute. “Come!” You smile and lead him to a small bench.

“Brianna?”

You turn your head, pulling the hood of the hoodie off to see better and you can’t belive who’s here. At this fucking hour.

He looked as surprised to see me as I was to see him. "What are you doing here?" he asked, his tone a mixture of concern and annoyance. He approaches me. “I knew I heard your voice. I thought- I thought I was crazy for a sec.” He looks up and down on me like he’s seen a ghost I wonder if I look okay, I didn’t bother to look in the mirror.

"I needed some fresh air," I replied, my voice cold, mirroring the chill in the night, trying not to make eye contact with him.

"Well, you should have stayed at home," he snapped back, his frustration apparent. "You can't just walk around in the middle of the night alone."

"I can do whatever I want," I shot back, my temper flaring, looking up at him. “I don't need you to tell me what to do." My attention goes back to the dog as he bites my finger in a playful way. Jungkook just stares at it looking down on me.

“Brianna, I want to understand-“

In the midst of our vulnerable embrace, a sudden surge of frustration and anger overwhelmed me. You get up, he takes 2 steps back. “You think you can just swoop in and fix everything?" I snapped, pushing Jungkook away. "You don't know what I've been through. You don't understand."

Jungkook's eyes narrowed, his own temper flaring. "Maybe I don't, but that doesn't mean I don't care. I hate seeing you like this, shutting everyone out, including me." He points to himself and talks in an exhausted way.

I scoffed bitterly, a bitter laugh escaping my lips. "And what? You think you can change that? You think your concern will magically solve all my problems?"

He clenched his fists, his jaw set in determination. "No, I don't think it will magically solve everything. But at least you won't have to face it alone. We're friends, aren't we? Friends support each other."

"Friends?" I scoffed again, the word tasting like ash in my mouth. "Friends wouldn't fight all the time. Friends wouldn't constantly push each other's buttons."

Jungkook's expression softened, hurt flickering in his eyes. "Maybe we're more than just friends," he said, his voice surprisingly gentle. "Maybe I care about you more than I'm willing to admit."

His words hung in the air, heavy with the weight of unspoken emotions. I felt a pang of guilt, realizing that my anger had overshadowed his genuine concern. "I don't know what I want," I confessed, my voice breaking. "I'm scared of messing things up, of losing the people I care about. Again.”

Jungkook stepped closer, his hand reaching out to gently cup my cheek. "You don't have to have all the answers right now," he said softly. "Just know that I'm here for you, no matter what. We can figure it out together."

In that moment, the fight within me crumbled, replaced by a flood of emotions. I let out a shaky breath, feeling the weight of my fears lifting, if only a little. Jungkook pulled me into a comforting hug, and for the first time that night, I felt a glimmer of hope.

We stood there, wrapped in each other's arms, the night around us slowly coming to life. In that moment, I realized that maybe, just maybe, I didn't have to face everything alone. Perhaps, with Jungkook by my side, I could find the strength to confront my fears and conquer the challenges ahead.

As we stood there, embracing each other under the moonlit sky, I felt a sense of warmth and security wash over me. It was as if Jungkook's presence had cast away the shadows that had clouded my thoughts. I took a deep breath, trying to steady my racing heart.

"Thank you," I whispered, my voice catching in my throat. "I don't know what I would do without you."

Jungkook pulled back slightly, his hands cupping my face again as he looked into my eyes with sincerity. "You'll never have to find out," he said, his voice soft but resolute. "We're in this together, remember?"

A small smile tugged at the corners of my lips as I nodded, feeling a newfound sense of resolve. "Yeah, together," I echoed, realizing that I wasn't alone in my struggles anymore.

We continued our walk, no longer in silence but with a comfortable ease between us. We talked about our fears, dreams, and everything in between. With each word, the connection between us deepened, and I found solace in sharing my thoughts with someone who truly understood.

As the night turned into dawn, we returned home. The sun was beginning to rise, painting the sky with hues of pink and gold, signaling a new day and a fresh start.

He walked me home but before he could leave I stop him. “What were you doing alone at that hour? you didn’t tell me.”

Jungkook is silent for a moment before he starts “Thinking.”

“About?” You ask couriously.

“You.”

Before you could try to make him explain what the fuck was that he left.

“Rehearsal today at 4 ok?” he shots from the street.

You giggle and give him a thumbs up.

What the hell did just happen.

______

"You know, I think they make a great couple," Avery mused, her voice laced with a sense of certainty. She reached out, deftly taking the blunt from Zac's hand, her fingers brushing against his in a fleeting touch. Zac's gaze followed the movement, his expression a mix of annoyance and intrigue.

"Hm?" Zac responded, his curiosity piqued as he took in the mention of Jungkook and Bri.

Avery settled into his lap, the weight of her presence grounding him in the moment. She exhaled a puff of smoke, blowing it up. "Jungkook and Bri, don’t ya think?" Avery's words hung in the air, mingling with the faint aroma of mari*uana. Zac's eyes flicked towards Bri's image in his mind, then back to Avery. He hesitated, the smoke clouding his thoughts momentarily.

"Um, yeah, sure, but they don’t seem like they like each other or shit," Zac replied, his voice a low murmur as he tried to make sense of the situation. Avery's eyes met his, a playful glint dancing in them as she inched closer. Before she could take another puff, Zac leaned in, capturing her lips in a pressed kiss.

"I think they really like each other," Avery murmured against his lips, her words muffled yet sincere. Her fingers traced a thoughtful path along his jawline, her touch a gentle caress that seemed to ease the tension in his muscles. "I know Bri is afraid, I just know it, but JK? What would he be afraid of?" She furrowed her brows, deep in contemplation.

"Afraid of moving too fast and lose her?" Zac suggested, his voice barely audible, his thoughts unraveling like the tendrils of smoke surrounding them. He shrugged, the uncertainty evident in his gaze.

"God, you're really smart," Avery whispered, her lips brushing against his cheek in a tender peck. With a soft sigh, she slid off his lap, the absence of her warmth leaving a lingering sensation. Rising from the couch, she reached for her phone, her fingers gliding across the screen as she dialed a number.

____

Avery's eyes widened in disbelief, her excitement palpable as I recounted the bizarre events of the previous night, or was it technically today?

"I can't believe it! No way, you did what?" Avery exclaimed, her voice echoing with a mix of shock and exhilaration.

The weight of the situation pressed down on me, making my palms clammy as I buried my face in them. "I don't know, I feel so weird right now," I confessed, my words muffled against my hands. "I have a rehearsal with him in an hour."

Avery's eyes glinted with determination as she seized upon the moment, her excitement bubbling over. "You gotta ask him what was that!" she urged, her words rapid, punctuated by animated gestures. She jumped up and down on the sofa, the energy radiating from her contagious enthusiasm.

"I'm scared," I admitted, my voice barely audible as I grappled with the overwhelming vulnerability that threatened to consume me. "I'm scared to let someone into a place so important in my life again. Music means everything to me. I… I can't. I feel like I'm betraying someone."

Avery's eyes blazed with fiery determination, her frustration palpable as she unleashed her pent-up emotions. "Gosh, you're not betraying Ander! That fucker literally could've made you lose your show!"

I shook my head, my thoughts racing. "I'm… I'm not talking about him," I confessed, my voice quivering. "I just don't know what to do. I don't know if I can do this. I feel like I let him in too much. What if I lose him too? What if, on the day of the show, he'll say he won't come? What if—"

Before I could finish my sentence, Avery's hands shot out, shaking me and pinching me sharply. "Ouch!" I yelped, wincing from the sudden pain.

"You're like a crazy person talking right now," Avery retorted, her frustration palpable. She glared at me, her eyes fierce with determination. In a moment of impulse, I grabbed my phone and dialed Jungkook's number, my fingers trembling as I pressed the call button.

"Hi, it's me," I said, my voice catching in my throat. "Yeah, don't come today... No, don't. Bye."

Avery's jaw dropped, her eyes widening in disbelief. "What the hell was that, why?!" she screamed, her frustration boiling over. She pulled at her hair in exasperation, her voice tinged with desperation. "You're not thinking straight!! The show is in 3 days! Come on! Once this is over, you'll find someone else if you're so scared of falling for him."

"Falling? What do... You think I love him?" I stammered, my words trailing off as I tried to make sense of my own feelings.

"You definitely love each other," Avery stated matter-of-factly, her tone unwavering. "You're both two dumb fuckers. Call him to come to rehearsals, for god's sake, I'm out."

"W-wait, Avery!" I shouted, but she was already gone, her footsteps fading into the distance.

"Fuck, it even started raining!" she screamed from the porch, her words carried away by the wind as she drove away.

I sigh in frustration as I collapse onto the plush couch, my weary eyes scanning the ominous clouds looming outside the window. With a heavy heart, I receive a notification alert on my phone, urging me to stay indoors due to an impending danger and an imminent rainstorm. The familiar sense of dread washes over me, and I can't help but mutter a resigned exclamation under my breath, "God... not again."

I pull the notification bar down, revealing a series of alerts detailing the severity of the situation. Flash flood warnings, gusty winds, and potential power outages are mentioned, intensifying my sense of unease. With a deep breath, I rise from the couch, my footsteps heavy as I move towards the window to get a better view of the darkening sky.

The atmosphere outside grows ominous, the clouds swirling in a chaotic dance, painting the sky with shades of deep gray. The wind starts to howl, rattling the windows as if nature itself is echoing my inner turmoil. I glance around the room, contemplating my options. The dimming light emphasizes the urgency of the situation, urging me to make a decision.

Taking a moment to gather my thoughts, I quickly assess the supplies in my home – candles, emergency rations, and a flashlight. I grab them, creating a makeshift emergency kit, hoping it will be enough to tide me over if the storm takes a turn for the worse. As I secure the windows and doors, I can't shake off the feeling of vulnerability, a reminder of the unpredictable nature of life.

I return to the couch, clutching the emergency kit tightly, and stare out of the window once more. Raindrops splatter against the glass, blurring the world into a surreal painting of water and shadows.

I make myself some hot coco and before the power is out, which will probably be by the night, I turn on the TV to watch Brooklyn 99 and put a nice comfy blanket.

My heart pounds in my chest, the echoes of the thunderstorm still reverberating through the air as I try to calm my racing thoughts. The glow from the TV screen illuminates the room, casting eerie shadows on the walls. Just as I start to regain a semblance of composure, the knocks on the door pierce the silence like a gunshot. I jump, my breath catching in my throat, and I shoot a fearful glance towards the entrance, my mind racing with possibilities.

"Fuck..." I mutter under my breath, hesitating before the door. I entertain the fleeting hope that whoever it is might just go away, but my hopes are dashed when another round of four loud knocks reverberates through the house, each one intensifying my anxiety. The situation feels surreal, the storm outside mirroring the turmoil within me.

My hands tremble as I reach for the doorknob, my heart pounding in my ears. Then, amidst the chaos of the storm, a familiar shout cuts through the air, calling my name. "BRI. IT’S ME… OPEN." The sound of his voice sends a mixture of relief and concern washing over me. Without a second thought, I throw the door open, my eyes widening in surprise at the sight before me.

There stands Jungkook, drenched from head to toe, his clothes clinging to him like a second skin. I try to push away the distracting thoughts about his perfect abs and body, focusing on the immediate concern. "Get in the house; you're shivering," I say urgently, my hand reaching out to pull him inside. His shivering intensifies, and I can't help but worry about his well-being.

"Fuck—let me get—"

"Bri."

"Let me get towels and clothes and—"

"Bri." He stops me, his eyes locking onto mine with a depth of concern that sends a shiver down my spine.

"I—" I start to protest, but his worry silences me. I nod, my determination to help him overpowering any embarrassment. "Let me grab you something. Please. I don't want you to be sick." I manage to tear my gaze away from his intense eyes and hurriedly make my way towards the closet, pretending not to notice his actions as he starts to undress behind me, though my cheeks burn with an undeniable awareness.

As I fumble through my closet, my hands search for something that might fit Jungkook. Finally, I pull out an oversized T-shirt and a pair of sweats that used to be snug on me when I was a bit chubbier. I hold my breath, hoping against hope that they'll fit him. I mutter a silent prayer under my breath, my fingers crossed as I bring the clothes to him.

"Here," I say, my voice a little shaky, trying my best not to meet his gaze directly, feeling the weight of his presence in the room.

"Thanks," he replies, his voice carrying a mix of gratitude and amusement as he accepts the towel and the clothes. After he dries himself, he starts to dress, and a soft laugh escapes his lips. "They're a bit... tight."

"I—yeah, I don't have anything else—" I stammer, my cheeks flushing with embarrassment. My eyes dart away, not wanting to acknowledge the situation, even though his laughter is contagious.

"Bri," he says, his tone serious now, his laughter fading away. "I can't believe you told me I shouldn't come... I wanted to speak to you in person.”

His words hang heavily in the air, and I feel my heart skip a beat. I struggle to find the right words, my emotions in turmoil. "Jungkook... look, it's—" I start, my voice cracking with a mix of vulnerability and affection, wanting desperately to express what I feel but not sure how to articulate it.

"It's complicated," I finally manage to say, my voice barely audible over the distant rumble of thunder. I glance up, meeting Jungkook's eyes, searching for understanding. "I've been through so much, and I'm afraid... afraid of getting hurt again."

Jungkook's expression softens, his eyes reflecting empathy and sincerity. He takes a step closer, his hand reaching out to gently cup my cheek, his touch warm and reassuring. "Bri, I understand. I know it won't be easy, but I'm willing to try if you are. We can face the challenges together."

His words hang in the air, a silent promise that sparks a glimmer of hope within me. I find myself leaning into his touch, craving the comfort he offers. The storm outside mirrors the turbulence within my heart, but in this moment, Jungkook's presence provides a sense of calm amidst the chaos. “I thought we talked about this this morning. You were so committed-“

"I... I don't know. But all i know is i don’t want to lose you." I admit, my voice barely above a whisper, my eyes locked onto his. The vulnerability in his gaze resonates with my own fears and insecurities, creating a connection that goes beyond words.

He leans closer, and closer, and closer,

before I know, his lips meet me in a moment of sweet surrender, Jungkook's touch is gentle yet firm as he cups my face, his fingers warm against my skin. I close my eyes, savoring the softness of his lips, the taste of him like a bittersweet melody. His kiss is tender, a silent promise of affection and understanding.

A rush of emotions floods over me—desire, vulnerability, and a profound sense of connection. The air crackles with electricity, the charged atmosphere intensifying the intimacy of the moment. My fingers find their way into his soft hair, tangling in the strands as I pull him closer, deepening the kiss.

Jungkook responds with a soft sigh, his lips parting slightly, inviting me in. Our tongues meet in a slow, sensual dance, exploring each other with a hunger that transcends words. The kiss deepens, becoming a passionate exchange of emotions and desires, a silent conversation that speaks volumes.

I can feel the steady beat of Jungkook's heart against my chest, matching the rhythm of my own pulse. The world outside may be in chaos, but in this moment, there is only us—two souls intertwined in a kiss that feels like coming home. Time seems to stretch, the kiss becoming an eternity, a stolen moment of bliss that leaves us both breathless and wanting more.

When we finally pull away, our breaths mingling in the air.

In the dimness that followed the abrupt power outage, Jungkook's voice cut through the sudden silence, his words trailing off in the darkness. "I'm sorry if-" he began, but the sentence hung in the air, abruptly interrupted by the blackout.

A frustrated groan escaped my lips as I fumbled in the dark, desperately searching for my phone. "Fuck," I muttered, realizing the futility of the attempt.

“Bri, where are you?" Jungkook called out, his voice tense in the darkness.

My hands reached out, seeking his in the pitch-black void. "I'm looking for my phone. It should be here somewhere," I explained, patting the couch in vain.

"Can you give me your phone?" I asked, hoping for a glimmer of light to guide us through the oppressive darkness.

"I forgot it at home," he admitted with a nonchalant shrug, his voice carrying a hint of defensiveness. "I rushed here! It's your fault!" he defended himself.

"How could you just leave without it?" I questioned, genuine disbelief coloring my tone. The realization that we were stranded without any source of light intensified the surreal nature of the situation. A deafening thunderclap reverberated through the house, adding an extra layer of tension to the already charged atmosphere. "Fuck, that was a big one," I remarked, my nerves on edge.

Finally, Jungkook's hands found mine, and he grasped my hand firmly, ensuring we moved in the same direction. The house enveloped us in impenetrable darkness, and my thoughts raced, thinking how we just kissed but we act like nothing happend.

Breaking the uneasy silence, I suggested, "My iPad is in my room. Let's get there to have some light."

"Don't you have flashlights?" Jungkook inquired, his grip on my hand tightening, revealing a touch of vulnerability.

"I took them out about an hour ago, but I have no idea where I put them," I admitted with a sigh, frustration lacing my words.

"Damn, Bri," Jungkook sighed, a subtle chuckle escaping him.

"Hey, you left your phone at home," I retorted, a laugh bubbling up in response to the irony of our predicament.

“Lead the way then,” Jungkook sighed, and we navigated cautiously through the darkness, the air thick with tension. Suddenly, a soft bump resonated through the space, and I winced. “Be careful,” he urged, his hands now assisting me in ascending the stairs.

Reaching the second floor, I extended my arms, feeling for familiar surroundings. The second floor has my room, a guest bathroom, my parent’s room and a guest room. Mine is right next to the stairs.

"Here," I announced, finding my bedroom door. Inside, my fingers fumbled on the nightstand, searching for my iPad. "Damn it, I forgot to charge it. It only has 10%," I exclaimed in frustration. When I looked up, Jungkook's big doe eyes met mine, and I felt a strange warmth despite the chilly darkness.

"I can't believe it," he mumbled, plopping on the bed and reaching for the iPad to illuminate the room.

"I don't really use it," I defended myself.

"Good excuse," he teased, scanning the room with the makeshift light. His attention shifted to a framed photo on my dresser. "That's you?" he asked, pointing to a picture with me and Avery.

I nodded, picking up the photo. "Yeah, next to me is Avery."

He wore an impressed expression. "You sure had a glow-up. How old is this?"

"Like five years ago?" I guessed, placing the photo back on the nightstand.

"And you're..." I realized I hadn't shared my age.

"20," I quickly added, feeling a sudden twinge of self-consciousness.

"Aw, you were just 15," he smiled, studying my face.

"Yeah, and ugly and dumb," I self-deprecated.

"Hey! Don't say that! Now you're just not ugly," he teased, his characteristic smirk on full display.

"What the hell?" I playfully pushed him, and he burst into laughter.

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding," he reassured, still chuckling.

"Sure," I sighed, opening the wardrobe to grab a hoodie. The room seemed to grow colder, prompting me to put it on.

"You cold?" He asked, looking over at me.

"A bit," I admitted, biting my lip.

“Damn.” Jungkook muttered, his gaze lingering on me as I pulled the hoodie over my head. The dim light from the iPad cast subtle shadows on his face, emphasizing the uncertainty in his expression.

I caught the hint of something unspoken in the air, prompting me to break the silence. “What’s going on in that head of yours?” I asked, trying to lighten the mood. I sit next to him now laying down, covering myself in the blanket.

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Just thinking about how crazy tonight has been. I mean, I came here on a storm, we went from a blackout to searching for an iPad in the dark.”

I chuckled, the tension easing a bit. “Yeah, it’s been quite the adventure.”

He lays down next to me.

His eyes met mine, a flicker of something more intense passing between us. “And there’s that,” he added, his voice softer now.

“What do you mean?” I inquired, sensing a shift in the atmosphere. Moving myself completely to face him.

“You know,” he started, choosing his words carefully. “The kiss. It happened, and now we’re here in the dark, and it’s like it never did.”

I felt my cheeks warm, the memory of our unexpected kiss replaying in my mind. “Yeah, about that,” I began, unsure where the conversation would lead.

He cut me off with a gentle smile. “I’m not complaining. Just trying to wrap my head around it.”

“Do you wan-“ He cuts me off.

.“I don’t know. Do you want to play 20 Questions or something to pass the time.” He seems very agitated.

“Sure, why not?” I agreed, eager to divert our thoughts. I try to not show how i really feel about just getting over the kiss subject.

“Okay, first question: Where did you grow up?”

His expression shifted momentarily, a flicker of hesitation crossing his features. “Seoul,” he replied vaguely, not offering more details. “You?” He asks curiously.

“Brooklyn.” I sensed his reluctance to delve into the topic, so I changed course. “My parents actually moved to another state a while ago. It’s been strange not having them around.”

Jungkook looked genuinely interested. “Really? Why’d they move?”

“Work,” I explained. “They found better opportunities, and I guess they wanted a change of scenery. It’s just me here now.”

His eyes softened with understanding, and I could tell he wanted to ask more.

Instead, I diverted the conversation to his parents.

“And your folks? What about them?”

I noticed a subtle shift in his demeanor, a guardedness that hadn’t been there before

“They’re around,” he replied vaguely, avoiding eye contact.

I sensed his reluctance and decided not to press further. “Fair enough.

“I’ve been wondering about Ander- If you wanna talk about it. Like how’d you two met and how did you start a freaking band?” He asks, his eyes searching for mine.

“Ander’s been my friend since high school. We both had this crazy obsession with old music, and we bonded over that,” she began, a nostalgic smile playing on her lips. “He initiated that we should make a ‘band,’ and I’d be the lead singer while he’d be the guitarist. He was really talented, playing all day in school, driving teachers crazy. He’s still good, but, you know, people change who they are, not their capabilities.”

Jungkook, his eyes reflecting genuine interest, listened carefully to her story. Brianna, embracing the newfound openness between them, decided to steer the conversation toward Jungkook’s passions.

“Let’s get over that topic,” she chuckled, nudging him playfully. “Tell me, aside from music, what are your other passions or hobbies?”

Jungkook, a plushie of a cat in hand, smiled as he confessed, “Well, I’m into photography.”

“Really?” Brianna’s curiosity sparked, and she straightened on the bed.

“Yeah, I like capturing moments, you know? I’d love to take pictures of you one day,” he said, his smile accompanied by a playful wink.

“If I let you,” she replied, giggling. “Have you ever traveled outside of the US?”

“Yeah, um, I went to almost every country in europe with my family, we stayed like 2 days in each for the summer break when i was in 11th grade. I loved Santorini.”

“Wow. Impressive. So you’re rich rich.” she elbows him. Actually, she was so much impressed than she showed him.

“My parents are, yeah, not me.” He corrects, modesty in his tone.

“Yeah but-“ I got cut off by him again.“You? Have you traveled?”

“Only in some states where i have my aunts or uncles.” I pout and get jealous of how much he’s seen.

“If you could change one decision from your past, what would it be and why?” I ask.

Jungkook paused, then confessed, “I think there’s a part of me that wishes I had pursued music more passionately from the beginning. I held back a bit out of fear.”

I remain silent as I take the cat from

his hand.

“What’s your biggest dream, Brianna?” Jungkook now looks at the cat but his eyes shift to mine, looking for truth.

“To make people feel connected to my music, to make people feel happy, feel sad, party to it, cry to it, to have thousands of people coming to watch me sing for them.”

“Well i’ll tell you a secret, i’m from the future and what you said it’s gonna happen.”

“Come on.” I laugh and punch his arm lightly. “Ok now me again.” I pause and think. “If you could have dinner with anyone, dead or alive, who would it be?”

“Such a “What to ask on a first date” from Wikihow or Buzz Feed kind of stuff question.”

“Fuck off!” they laughed, playful shoves exchanged. “Tell me!” I keep pushing him.

“Ok ok, Elvis Presley. I absolutely adore that man’s music.”

I nod, trying to find someone I’d go to dinner with. “I’d go with Freddy Mercury”

He looks at the ipad that now has

1% “Good choice. Hey, this is about to die.”

“We also don’t have internet connection or signal to see when we’ll get the power back.”

I sigh. Does that mean he’s gonna spend the night? I question myself.

“So lucky of us.” I sigh and look at him

again.

“Yeah.” he shrugs and when the Ipad finally ends it life, we stay in the darkness.

"I'm so bored," Jungkook announces, his voice echoing the monotony of the dark room.

"What's your body count?" I blurt out, surprising even myself with the sudden boldness.

"Damn, straight forward, huh?" he giggles, the dimness concealing the sly grin on his face. "I don't know, I don't count them."

"Approximately. Like you gotta know," I insist, pushing for a hint of revelation.

"I really don't know. You tell me," he challenges, turning the tables on me.

"I'm not telling you," I assert, maintaining a semblance of mystery.

"Why should I then?" he counters, his playful defiance hanging in the air.

"Fair," I sigh, but just as the silence begins to settle, Jungkook decides to unravel a bit of his own mystery. "It's around 15."

Leaning in, I tease, "Oh, I expected much more."

"Do I look like such a fuckboy? Don't answer that," he injects, his tone suddenly serious, only to be met with an eruption of laughter from me. He continues: "Even 15 is much. I wish it was like 2 or 3."

"Yeah, it may not be the best number, but still better than a lot of guys. Mine is 2," I confesses, revealing a surprising layer of vulnerability.

"Boyfriends?" He inquires, sensing there might be more to this story.

"Myeah," I acknowledge with a casual nod.

"I see. Have you ever… had anything with Ander?" Jungkook probes, curious about the dynamics between us.

"Hell no," I asserts "Well, he tried many times, but I friendzoned him until he got over and started liking other girls. He also tried to kiss me but nothing more. If he tried anything else… well, let's just say I'd be singing alone all the time."

"I see," He respond, the room now buzzing with a different energy, laughter and revelations dancing in the dimness. He stays silent a bit before continues in a low voice: “Do you have kinks?”

My hand trembled slightly as I took a sip of water, trying to mask my surprise at Jungkook's unexpected turn in the conversation. His chuckle cut through the awkwardness like a lifeline, and he leaned back, a playful glint in his eyes.

"If you're going to ask me such a personal question, it's only fair I get to ask you one in return," he declared, raising an eyebrow as if challenging me.

"Only if you spill first," I countered, unwilling to let him off the hook.

"I asked first," he retorted, a small smirk playing on his lips.

"I don't care," I shot back, determination in my tone.

"Me neither," he sighed, his gaze holding mine in a playful standoff. The room fell into a sudden, uncomfortable silence, amplifying the sound of tree branches scraping against the house and the howling wind outside. It was still dark.

"When the iPad died, it was around 10 pm," I mumbled, my attempt to bridge the gap with a practical detail.

A wry smile played on Jungkook's lips, his eyes holding a mixture of amusement and curiosity. "And now? Any guesses?"

I shook my head, realizing the absurdity of trying to estimate time in the pitch-black darkness. "No idea. Feels like we've been here forever."

He chuckled, a sound that carried a subtle reassurance. "Time flies, especially when you're in the dark with someone interesting."

A playful smile tugged at the corners of my lips as I navigated the intriguing twists of our conversation. "So you think I'm interesting," I remarked, my smile lingering even though he couldn't see it.

He responded with a sly challenge, delving into a more personal territory. "I might think that if you tell me if you have kinks. I really think everyone does. I was thinking about it some time ago, discovered mine recently."

A mischievous idea crossed my mind. "If you tell me yours, I'll tell you mine."

"I don't want to; I asked first."

"And I don't care you asked first."

"Fuck, Brianna, what do I gotta do to make you say it?" he sighed, frustration evident as he let his head fall onto the pillow.

"Are you really that curious?" I teased, the dim room masking the playful glint in my eyes.

"Fuck yeah, now I am!" he exclaimed.

I pat his arm until I feel his hand, it was big, if you might add, and veiny, full of tattoos, even tho i couldnt see them, i knew they were there.

"You have a... hand kink?" He inquired, a hint of amusement in his voice.

"Well, if that's how you call it, then yes."

I confess.

"What exactly do you like about hands?" He now sounds serious and curious, like he really wants to know.

"They're hot. I just... they're hot," I admitted, and as his gaze met mine, I found myself captivated by the intensity in his eyes.

"Do you think mine are?" he whispered, a vulnerability underlying the question.

"Well, I do," I replied, almost hesitating. His hand found my waist, the warmth of his touch sending a shiver through me.

"What do you like, Jungkook?" I asked, the air between us charged with anticipation.

"Hmm, everything, especially you."

“W-what.” I whisper as he gets on top of me. I feel our bodies lean closer together, the heat between us rising with each breath. I run my fingers through Jungkook's hair, caressing his neck and tracing his shoulders. I draw him closer, his lips just moments away from meeting mine. Our lips finally meet, the passion finally released, our tongues mingling in an intimate dance. His hand squeezes mine, the other hand running down my body to my waist. I draw him closer, our bodies tangled intimately. I feel like I’m kissing him for the first time, even if I’m not.

Breaking the kiss, he looked into my eyes, both of us breathless. "Is this okay?" he asked, seeking affirmation for more than just the kiss.

"It's more than okay," I assured him.

"I really like you, Bri," he confessed, his hand gently caressing my face.

"I like you too," I finally admitted, and before he could say anything else, I pulled him into another deep kiss. Fingers entwined in his soft, fragrant hair, our connection deepening with each passing moment.

Suddenly, when everything was almost too perfect, we hear a loud beep, tv starts playing downstairs, the room now being all bright again, outside you couldn’t hear anything anymore. the storm has stopped. lucky us.

My heart raced as I pushed him away, the sudden intensity leaving an awkward tension in the room. "Now that's cringe," I mumbled, trying to diffuse the situation.

"Really?," he replied, a hint of amusement in his voice. He reached for my face, planting a small, lingering kiss on my swollen lips. Laughter escaped him, and confusion etched my features.

"W-what? Why are you laughing?" I stammered, feeling a surge of insecurity.

"Your cheeks, and nose, and forehead—you're blushing so hard," he chuckled. Before I could protest, he gently pushed me back onto the pillow, peppering my face with soft pecks.

"H-Hey!" I managed to utter between giggles, his kisses playfully tickling every inch of my blushing face. He finally stopped, getting up with a mischievous smile.

"Let's go downstairs," he suggested. I gathered myself, taking off my hoodie, revealing a simple tank top and sweatpants. As I left the room, the familiar sounds of a Brooklyn 99 episode echoed through the house. Retrieving my phone, I noticed a slew of messages and the late hour, now reaching 10 o'clock.

"It's late. I think I'll just leave now. When should I come for rehearsals? Also… I'll bring your clothes tomorrow," Jungkook said.

"No problem, maybe, uhh… like 1 pm?" I suggested, my newfound awkwardness betraying the earlier intensity.

"Right. I'll be there," he agreed. Cupping my face, he planted a final soft kiss on my lips. "Take care."

"You too," I replied, closing the door behind him. The weight of the moment lingered, and I couldn't help but reflect on the unexpected turn of events. Oh my god.

———

[leminysnickit]

HEY GUYS so um,,, I’m back sorry guys

2023 and 2024 has been crazy for me and my life outside of kicking rocks online and scrolling thru tumblr. But basically I’m going to start working on weekends regarding the comic and then some. A lot of stuff might not be always finished by the end of the week due to a new semester kicking my ass sooo smiley face IM GONNA DRAW AGAIN WOOHOO WOO WOOHOO PLEASE CLAP IT UP!!!

Also taking requests on main and second acc so I’ll leave asks open smiley face

[jihyocentric]

https://www.tumblr.com/jihyocentric/705445290222714880/so-im-sure-im-not-alone-in-wanting-to-see-a

This jeongmohyo where momo is at work and jeongyeon sends her a video of jihyo giving her a titjob and momo is basically hard the rest of the day. To her surprise when she gets home jeongyeon is still there and absolutely pounding into a completely fucked out jihyo who is basically just babling at this point. Jeongyeon commands her to sit and watch till its her turn

thank you for the link! continuation of this

momo gets stuck at work during the weekend and she thinks this might be some sort of punishment for depriving her wife of her company. she’s not around, but jeongyeon is.

since the first time jeongyeon tagged along with them for something more intimate than just having a few drinks together, momo has been coming to terms with her taste for watching jihyo getting fucked by someone else.

she’s always with a hard on when she peers at them and gets completely ignored by her wife and jeongyeon. it’s as if she’s not even there and momo secretly loves it. it stirs momo up how jihyo easily tumbles into orgasms when she’s in jeongyeon’s hands, how easily jeongyeon breaks her apart.

momo’s fists tighten under her desk when she receives a message from jeongyeon with a video attached to it. she has seen jihyo when she’s worn out before, when all jihyo can think about is being jammed with cock, but momo has never seen her this broken.

jihyo cries, every single drop falling to her chest and getting mixed with the glistening layer of spit. momo hardens when jihyo squeezes her tits around jeongyeon’s shaft, stammering a small ‘please’, as if asking jeongyeon to fuck them instead of making her do the work.

she cries because no matter how long she’s been there with the warmth of her breasts engulfing jeongyeon’s cock, working her up to get her load, jihyo couldn’t make jeongyeon come. jeongyeon pulls her face away when jihyo tries to lick the peeking head, a haughty sneer playing on her face.

“bet you regret missing this, momorin,” jeongyeon taunts, fist grasping a hold of jihyo’s head by the hair, making jihyo look right into the camera. momo’s cock twitches inside her pants and she has to cross her legs to hide the bulge. “your little slut is a try hard, ‘d you know that? she can’t stop until i cum in her. is she always like this?”

momo lets out a whimper when jeongyeon makes jihyo hold her own tits around her thick shaft, pounding into the tight passage, just like jihyo wanted her to. momo could almost feel the smooth warmth herself, hips bucking automatically when jeongyeon took off, fucking her tits.

but then the video ends, leaving momo high and dry behind her work desk, forced to come back to her senses and get back to work despite having an aching tent in her pants.

momo only gets home once she’s sure she finished all the tasks given to her. that was the main reason why she wasn’t at home, with her wife, on a saturday. and she refused to go to work on a sunday, so everything had to be perfect.

she didn’t expect to find jeongyeon still there, as it was already night and jeongyeon didn’t usually stick around for too long, but the moment momo locks the door behind her, she can hear jihyo’s wanton moans and the sound of skin clapping resounding through the house.

the hard on she got earlier had chipped away after forcing herself to focus on her paperwork, but when she hears them it comes back, and way harder than before. momo immediately drops her things, stumbling as she rushes to their room, finding jeongyeon pounding into jihyo from behind.

jihyo could hardly hold herself up, so jeongyeon had to place a couple pillows under her hips, keeping her ass up for her to use. momo pulses in her boxers, standing far enough to get a nice view of them. jihyo doesn’t notice she’s there yet, but jeongyeon has a smile on her face when she peeks at momo.

none of them say a word, momo and jeongyeon trying to catch on what jihyo was trying to say, but they can’t understand anything aside from the pleas for jeongyeon to fuck her. jihyo babbles mindlessly, gripping at the sheets as she cried out, face red with a light mark of jeongyeon’s hand imprinted on her cheek.

momo has known about jihyo’s fondness for being spanked. sometimes they'd play around that, but never going too far. with jeongyeon, it seemed jihyo got starving for it, begging to receive some slaps across her thighs, ass, even on her face.

reminding that jihyo enjoyed being jeongyeon’s pet and going as far as getting spanked on the face always left momo jealous, as jihyo never did such things with her. rough sex was recurring with both of them, but jihyo was the most submissive with jeongyeon.

“take a sit, momorin,” jeongyeon rasps, stomach tightening when jihyo clenches around her, apparently aware that momo was there. “i didn’t take her pussy. ‘s all yours when i’m done.”

momo grunts at that, knowing jihyo might be desperate to have something filling her pussy up, and she was craving to bury herself inside jihyo. momo sits on a chair that had been intentionally placed next to the bed, rolling the zipper of her pants down, releasing her shaft from the straining clothes.

momo licks her lips as she pulls her pants down along with the boxers, never looking away from them.

“let me join,” momo husks, drawing jeongyeon’s attention. “please, been like this all day ‘cause of you.”

“but what’s the fun in giving what you want?” jeongyeon muses, pace slowing down.

she keeps her cock deep inside jihyo’s ass, making her whine for more, wanting jeongyeon to move, trying to fuck herself on the cock lodged up inside her. jeongyeon coos, amused. after many rounds of sex, jihyo was still greedy for more.

“we can be both inside.” momo pleads, fist firm around her flushed cock, needing a release badly. “she’ll love this.”

“you will love this,” jeongyeon scoffs. momo pouts, nearly crying, knowing she’d wait too long until jeongyeon came to be inside jihyo, her own wife. “c’mere, then.”

momo gets up, a breath of relief escaping from her lips when jeongyeon takes pity on her. jeongyeon doesn’t pull out, raising jihyo’s hips so she could throw the pillows somewhere else then making jihyo lay on her side to give momo some access.

“can i?” momo asks jihyo, earning a mindless ‘yes’, jihyo barely aware of what she’s being asked, too fucked out to understand. she places jihyo’s leg over her hipbone, notching the tip of her cock inside jihyo with ease, the younger of the three drenched with cum and slick. “so fucking good,” momo grunts.

“good girl,” jeongyeon praises, lips next to jihyo's ear. jihyo closes her eyes, humming at the praise, head tucked in momo’s neck as she felt her wife sink inside. “look so pretty taking us, hyo.”

the pleasure is blinding once momo is fully in and jihyo mewls, nails sinking down momo’s back as they take off together. momo’s pace is rowdy, desperate, and jeongyeon has to match it, pulling out until only the tip was inside and then filling her ass when momo wasn’t all the way in jihyo’s pussy.

jihyo shudders as an orgasm hits her for the nth time, jeongyeon’s fingers rolling over her sensitive clit, biting down momo’s shoulders as she tightens around them. momo nears the edge entirely too soon, being squeezed by jihyo’s walls and jeongyeon’s cock, that was only separated from hers due to a thin wall.

“fuck, can’t hold it,” momo whines, gripping jihyo’s waist tight as she fucks into her with wild abandon, hot cum spurting deep inside jihyo, reaching her peak sooner than she would normally allow herself to.

“that fast?” jeongyeon teases, pulling out. she wanted to release her built up pleasure somewhere else. “look at me, hyo.”

momo pulls out, letting jihyo lay on her back to glance up at jeongyeon, who was kneeling next to her. jihyo can hardly get ready, jeongyeon’s load coating her cheeks and neck, a thick, warm essence leaving her even messier.

momo doubts jihyo has any power in her body to take them again, but she grows hard again with what she sees, cock standing tall against her belly as jeongyeon uses her wife’s face as a cum dump.

jeongyeon coos, ogling momo’s growing erection. “need some help, momorin?”

jihyo giggles, slightly dizzy but still conscious, and momo swallows hard at the suggestion, her pride vanishing when she reminds of the feeling of having jeongyeon inside her.

[sunghoonnsupremacy]

#LOVETALK! - warnings: cuss words, slapping.

001. - 002.

my legs felt wobbly as if they were about to break into tiny pieces resembling porcelain, feeling his stare on my figure. walking over to my friendgroups lunch table, I try to keep my focus away from the cat shaped eyes that are boring into my soul.

"soomin-ah, are you okay? " my friend karina asks with a worry filled look on her face. I nod with a smile and sit down next to her, preparing to eat my food. my other friends, keeho and aeri quickly wave my direction as they continue to munch on their lunch.

a sigh escapes my mouth when I feel my stomach grumble at the lack of food. I grab my chopsticks and eat some gimbap, trying to eat as much as i could before the bell would announce more pain and suffering.

when all of a sudden, a silence falls upon the table without me noticing.

my thigh shivers under the cold touch of somebodys hand, while sensing a presence sitting down next to me.

"hey soomin. " his voice basically in need of an emotion. multiple (3) pairs of eyes fall on us when i turn to look at him with a shaky smile.

"hello jungwon. " I look into his eyes with a look of confusion. "are you still coming over? " his voice rearranging the mechanism in my brain.

when I accidentally take too long to reply, karina nudges my arm from beside me, knocking me back into my senses.

a fast nod moves my head, his smile appearing once again and squeezing my thigh. "good." and with that he stands up and walks out of the canteen.

"what was that? " keeho loudly asks me. I struggle to reply while thinking of a excuse. "we have a project due next week together so we agreed on meeting up at his place today. "

"yeah? what class? " keeho asks with narrowed eyes. "literature." if only they heard the lies on the tip of my tongue. aeri nods uncertainly and goes back to eating. a sigh escapes my mouth, doing the same.

"anyway, I heard there was a party happening soon at the frat house. you know the one where sunghoon is in. " karina announces with a giddy smile and claps her hands at the mention of another party.

we all laugh at her enthusiasm, karina pouting in frustration. "hey whats so funny? " she crosses her arms over her chest and grumbles.

"nothing rina, you're just an alcoholic. " aeri giggles, still finding it funny.

"do you know the date? " I speak up, wanting to hear more about the booze filled event. karina checks her phone and scrunches her eyebrows, replying with a "in two days i suppose. thats friday. "

shit. Im supposed to be at jungwons day that aswell. how do i cover that up? isn't he friends with sunghoon? would he let me go? I let out a frustrated noise as they all look at me, weirded out.

"you can't come? " keeho asks with a frown. I sigh once again and rest my head on my palms. "I can't, my parents invited me over for dinner and to stay the night. " another perfect lie being said by me today.

"oh come on im sure you can convince them to let you go out. you're 18 already. have some fun once in a while! " karina giggles and puts her hands in a prayer motion. a bunch of please's come out of my friends mouths as I laugh at their desperation and nod.

"okay okay ill ask them. ill let you guys know later! " I shoot them a quick smile and finish my food, almost perfectly timed with the bell ringing.

all four of us let out a groan at the sound, knowing that we have to spend another hour or two in this shit hole before getting to go home and into their comfortable bed (them atleast).

we say our goodbyes, hence our classes being in different parts of the school building. I quickly run over to my biology class, not wanting to piss off my grumpy teacher even more.

sitting down in my seat, I turn around to greet nicholas, a former neighbor of mine. "hi nicholas! how are you today? " a sweet smile sits on my face while I wait for his response.

he smiles back warmly and answers, "hey. im good, how are you, pretty? " he shoots me one of his signature winks, resulting in me giggling at his bad flirting attempt.

a glare settles on his face when he notices me laughing at him instead of falling for him. "one day I'll get you to take me seriously. " he rolls his eyes and leans back into his chair.

" yeah sure, mr. lover" I sign quotation marks, mimicking what he calls himself both offline and online which I find quite embarrassing might I say, hence him not pulling one girl ever.

he groans and kicks my chair. "you just don't get the love I send out. " he sighs, flipping his hair like a disney princess. I snort at this, knowing the only love he ever shows to anybody is his sock.

before we get to chat more, the teacher hurries into the class, apologising for his late arrival leaving me quite suprised since I've never seen the dude own up to his mistakes before and I've been in this class for a year now.

biology goes on smoothly, me answering a couple questions because im petty and like to beat nicholas in everything.

after class ends, we basically run out of the classroom in happiness that the day is over. nicholas throws his hand over my shoulder and walks me towards the school entrance.

I sigh, knowing I have to head to jungwons house instead of mine, otherwise it wouldn't end no where near well.

I give him a quick hug and say my goodbyes, trying to please jungwon by being on time.

after leaving a couple knocks on his door, his tall figure emerges from the wooden frame and pulls me in by hand, leaving me a bit stunned at his very forward action.

"jungwon what are you-" not even giving me the chance to reply, he locks the door and slams me onto the ground. I wince, since I was wearing a skirt and the cold wooden floors didn't do much help on the impact when I hit them.

"what were you doing with nicholas? huh? " he slowly walks over to me, glaring at me with cold eyes, something very different than seen from his at-school persona.

I try to think of a reply but his glare stops me from doing so. he bends down to my level and harshly grabs my chin with his slender fingers.

"answer me you bitch. you know I hate being ignored." his words are a slap onto my face as his fingers dig deeper into my flesh.

"nothing I was just saying bye to him. there's no need to get worked up. " I grumble, not meeting his eyes before realising I could've and most definitely should've worded that differently.

"don't speak to me with attitude, or we're gonna have a problem. " he lets go of my face and quickly pulls me up and slams me against the wall.

what is with this dude and causing me temporary back pain?

I nod and look back into his eyes, searching for some sort of emotion. "I'm sorry. " a quiet, whimper like sentence leaves my mouth, not wanting him to increase the ache in my body even more.

he rolls his eyes at my weak attempt to apologise , but lets me go. "don't pull that shit again, soomin. " he walks away into his (most assumed) living room and leaves me in the hallway.

"you can leave now. " he shouts at me from the living room, letting me go. I take the chance and get the hell out of there before he got even more angry.

how long has it been like this, you may ask? for about a month now. it started from cute smiles to creepy notes in my locker, leading up to this mess.

I've tried to escape his hold many times but it led to failed attempts. now I just learn to endure it.

arriving at my house, I plop down onto my bed, falling into a deep sleep. let's hope tomorrow won't be as tiresome as today was.

[virgin-mojitos]

STEVEN GRANT SFW ALPHABET -- PT 1

this was VERY fun to do and it made giggle a few times (dont tell anyone) here you go!

Activities – What are their favorite things to do with you? How do you spend your free time?

So in my opinion steven is one of those people who care about the company rather than the activity kind of person? Like we could be sitting silence reading and he’d be having a blast because its comfortable silene. Or we could go all out and creative and go to a pottery making date (yes this is peak creativity for me,im a very old fashioned coffee dates and fancy restaurants kind of gal. SUE ME!) and he would also have TONS of fun because he values the company and people he’s spending time with!

Boo! – How do they feel about surprises, giving and receiving?

Okay to be honest when I first read ‘BOO’ I was like ‘muahaha im gonna spook steven’ but then I finished reading and its about receiving and giving gift… ANYWAYS! Okay but about getting spooked, I feel like steven is just one of those people who get spooked easily. So okay imagine this, you’ve been living with steven for quite some time now (mmm like 4-5 months-ish) and hes doing something in the kitchen or reading or just sitting and staring into the void and you come quietly behind and just BARELY graze his shoulder and quietly say “steven..” he will get in attack mode im sorry. (like this) “ GAAaAh! WHA-? Oh gods you scared me” and he will clutch his boobs I means his pearls in fear and then laugh it off and ask you “what is it love? Did you need something?”  

Comfort – How do they comfort you when you’re upset? When the tables turn, do they come to you, or try to handle it themselves?

I guess it depends on every person and how they like to be comforted? Like me for example if im crying or having a bad day I just like to be left alone and ill come to you if or when im ready to talk. So with steven I think he would just be like a cat. Just lingering around me (with probably longing eyes) with a safe distance to give me space.

The other way around however, with steven I think he would love a shoulder to cry on or someone to hear him rant or ramble about why hes upset would be perfect. As he never had anyone to liste—nopE NOPE nevermind!

Dance – Do they like to dance with you? How good of a dancer are they?

im sorry people but steven is not a good dancer, like AT ALL. But boy does he love to dance around the flat, like I don’t know if its his autism but he may dance his way to place (like going from the bathroom to bedroom etc) or he could be standing perfectly still and just start to dance out of nowhere (don’t worry steven im right with ya) ALSO! OF COURSE HE LOVES DANCING WITH YOU?? Come on now, by now we know steven watches a lot of rom coms so of course he spins you around in the kitchen in the morning after a night of sweet love making (was that cringe? Yea probably) while making breakfast.

Excitement – How do they act when they’re excited? What excites them?

As we established, steven is very much on the autism spectrum so happy stims FOR DAYS! Jumping around, hand clapping, fist bumps you name it basically! And watch out for potential kisses all over your face especially when youre the reason of his excitement! Definitely do not think about steven picking you up and spinning you around your shared flat laughing his ass off, nope nope.

Future – What are their plans for the future? Do they see themselves getting married, having kids?

*loud gulp and body shiver* hmmm future? Married? KiDs? All very scary topics (to me) yes okay come on you know damn well he already thinks you’re the one when you greet gus the second (gus the first gone but never forgotton) with a smile when you first visit his place. Hes already thinking about the wedding venue when he puts himself down when he realizes that hes (cutely) rambling about his favorite myths and legands and you tell him “no no please continue, im genuinely interested. Besides you look very pretty talking about your interests wink wink” (yes I do say wink wink in real life). And hes thinking about how he wants 2 kids with you when one day your in the park walking together and your playing on the swings and a spoiled brat comes to you telling you that its their swing and asking you to move, so you smile sweetly and look into that brats eyes and say “ I didn’t realize it had your name on it?”

--- THIS IS NOT ALL OF THE ALPHABET (obviously) if you want more just tell me! ---

i got the template here!

(part 2)

[pankomako]

ok ever since i saw that hanky panky post it's been on my mind:

Similar to hanky panky, this was one of those games that i'd see kids play at school growing up, mainly on the school bus. for the uninitiated, or to jog your memory, Pikachu is essentially a first-to-two game of rock paper scissors with extra steps. the game starts with you and your opponent doing a little patty-cake hand movement sequence along to a chant. it goes "pi-ka-chu, going up, going down, going side by side" and the hand movements match the words as so:

"Pikachu": basically patty-cake.

"going up, going down": start with hands together, pointed towards opponent, back of one hand touching opponent's. both players clap their outside hands together above their hands on "up", their own hands on "going", and each other's hands below their other hands on "down".

"going side by side": players put their own hands together again, and make a side-to-side sweeping motion touching each other's hands 3 times.

once the chant is finished, you play RPS, but you say "pi-ka-chu" instead of "rock, paper, scissors, shoot". when one player wins a round, they put a finger on the loser's forehead. when a player wins a second round, they put their other finger to the loser's forehead and push on their head. which may cause them to hit their head on the bus window which, i know from experience, hurts pretty bad.

im curious if anyone else grew up with this, or if there's other variations of it, or if maybe it was just my school? please tell me (and reblog to help this reach more people)!

[les-mis-in-space]

⭐ 

I'm just letting you ramble because I'm incredibly indecisive have fun!

Okay instead of one BIG ramble I think I'm gonna do a bunch of little ones

None of the prisoners looked at the guards observing them, keeping their heads low as they worked to repair the ship. Two symphonies played a counterpoint duet— the instruments of nature being the gongs of thunder, the rattling of the rain, the clapping of the waves, with only the whistling of the wind to give melody to the excess of percussion; the music of the inmates being comprised of the falsetto hum of electrosaws, the clanging and clinking of hammers, the twisting wrenches groaning and screeching like kloo horns on fluctuating settings. Immediately to the left of Com Narcom, a Klatooinian gave lyrics to the cacophony in growled Huttese:

Stuka doompa, stuka doompa Hagwa stuka ta hoohah Stuka doompa, stuka doompa Unko uba nee choo,

And in lieu of a final syllable he would spit, quite forcefully, to approximate a rhyme, which would make his green leathery jowls quiver. At the third repetition of this verse, Narcom’s shaggy, sopping head whipped in the inmate’s direction with a snarled “Can you shut up?”

The singing Klatooinian locked eyes with Narcom and growled deep in his throat, like an akk dog ready to snap. A sentry probe zoomed over, its photoreceptor flashing red as a grating electronic bark warned them to leave each other alone and focus on their work.

Narcom’s eyes dropped. “I mean, can you shut up, please.”

If I could have done this with Master of the House I would have, but I could not get the Huttese lyrics to fit the meter. I was already kinda stretching here, meter-wise. I've always wondered how obvious the reference is to those who don't bother consulting a Huttese dictionary for the translation.

I’m sure there have been early mornings where your alarm has gone off and then, after a long session in the sanistream, you’ve sat on your bed wearing only a towel or your undergarments, procrastinating putting your clothes on for no real reason while you check the HoloNet on your datapad or think about how you’re going to get your protagonist out of the nest of gundarks you dropped her into in the last chapter— that or a particularly difficult math problem, whatever people who aren’t writers think about.

Passages you write before you're diagnosed with ADHD lol. Turns out this thing I thought was relatable probably only happens to a certain demographic on a regular basis. Still, I'm sure we've all had at least one experience like this. Com's basically in shock right now; he's a bit slow on the uptake while his brain tries to process the fact that someone is being nice to him.

“This thief says you gave them to him,” the officer sneered. “As a gift.”

Korma blinked. “But I did.”

The prisoner started.

The officer’s eyebrows shot skyward. “What?”

Korma leaned to peer over the officer’s shoulder. “Why is he in binders?" he demanded, throwing up his hand. "You will release him at once!”

"We'll release him at once," said the officer, waving two fingers toward the officers behind him. The policemen deactivated the cuffs. The prisoner rubbed his wrists, staring at the old Cerean with bewilderment.

“Return the knapsack,” Korma ordered. “Those belong to him.”

"These belong to him," said the officer, setting down the knapsack and stepping back.

“I thank you for taking the time to return my property,” said the bishop. “But no crime has been committed here. You can go about your business.”

The lead officer nodded, setting the knapsack on the ground and turning to the other officers. "We can go about our business."

This is not originally how the scene was written. Originally, there was no hand-wavery or repeating of sentences. Some time after I'd finished Part I, I was rereading this chapter and realized I'd missed an opportunity. Always good to add even more of a Star Wars touch. It also foreshadows the (admittedly obvious) reveal a couple paragraphs later.

Halmath picked up the imagecaster, holding the hologram of Kobjin’s head in his hand. He stared at it, as if it were the unearthed skull of someone he had once known. The familiarity was not reflected in the man’s hollow, empty eyes.

“Ah,” Halmath whispered. “Poor Com.”

Yes, this is a Hamlet reference. Thank you for noticing.

“Coming up now.” Adeg reached up and disengaged the hyperdrive. The vortex of lightspeed gave way to view of a round gray ball directly ahead with a thin ring of asteroids surrounding it.

Arkassos looked like a gas giant from space. It wasn’t a gas giant, of course, because it wasn’t gigantic— and its surface was terrestrial, a fact Lieutenant Adeg only knew because he’d been there before.

The young pilot glanced over his shoulder. “You’re going to want to strap in now, Minister,” he advised. “It’s going to get rough.”

Com frowned as the shuttle breached the stormy atmosphere. The rocking of the cockpit prompted him to take the pilot’s advice. He sat behind Adeg, closed his eyes, and tried to muster a meditative state despite the deafening thunder.

Suddenly, something smacked against the shuttle, sending it tipping starboard. Electric sparks arced through the cabin. The copilot swore while Able yelped. Com clutched his armrests as the ship wobbled. “What was that?”

“Shark, probably,” Adeg replied as he righted the craft. “They like to ram incoming ships. Must have slammed into our dorsal wing.”

“A shark… in the sky?” Com furrowed his brow.

“Yes sir,” nodded the pilot. “Arkassoan sharks swim in the air. They’ve got big wings like—”

“Like that,” McKrow pointed.

Com leaned to peer through the transparisteel. There, circling off to the side, was a shoal of creatures with long, slowly-flapping fins, and three dorsal fins each on their backs. They crackled with electricity as if their bodies were supercharged by the storm. Their bodies were ash-grey, except for the black ridge that stuck out over each one’s brow.

Com didn’t like them.

Sometimes, Star Wars locations have a unique feel to them that makes them instantly recognizable. My success in coming up with my own original planets varies in this regard. Trolorn is your run-of-the-mill water world, but the prison gives it an adequately distinctive signature. Dygni is pastoral with small towns— planets like that are a dime a dozen. Ditto with Monderon, although I tried to make Monderon stand out by being described as particularly boring and also containing occasional forests— had to have those woods for the scene where Leela meets Antilles. Montal is another water world— in coming up with a distinctive feel for the capital city, I decided to go with "Minas Tirith in the middle of the ocean." Pasir is not as urban as other Star Wars planets we've seen, but not at all as much of a backwater as most Outer Rim worlds either.

Anyway, all this to say, I seem to come up with my best gimmicks when the location is only briefly relevant. I thought, "Okay, what sets Arkassos apart?" and my brain came up with "giant flying lightning sharks." I laughed with my beta reader about how stupid random that idea was and then it turned out they really liked the sharks, so I *had* to go through with it.

The description of the sharks is intentional. Ash-gray, jutting black ridges over the brow... If you have a good memory, you should realize why Com doesn't care much for them.

As the convict went from house to house, he saw a pair of police officers. Their uniforms were like the guards’ uniforms on Trolorn, except that the guards had worn black caps and ash gray tunics, and the police officers’ caps and tunics were a matching shade of teal blue, with brass rank plaques and cap discs instead of silver.

Also note that the city below is enclosed in a giant cage. On a stormy planet. Surrounded by patrolling entities that will zap you if they catch you outside the walls. Com doesn't miss this parallel:

The shield gate began to open. “It’s ‘cause of the sharks,” the pilot explained as they passed through to land.

Com knew the pilot meant, to keep the sharks out. But between their stern black ridges and fins that crackled like electrobatons, he felt as if rather the sharks were there to keep them inside the cage.

As if to confirm his thought, Adeg added, “You thought it was rough back there, wait until we’re trying to leave.”

Wow. So far I've spent the most time rambling about the lightning shark planet.

Mrs. Bewl continued her testimony. “I’ll never forget that man. Drab clothes, scruffier than a Wookiee, and he smelled absolutely terrible. And he had this hungry look in his eyes, it gave me the creeps.”

Things that make Mrs. Bewl assume a man is dangerous include [checks notes] needing food

A moment later, a dark-skinned young man in a black uniform appeared in the refresher, with a protocol droid right behind him. “I saw what you did,” said Adeg breathlessly. “I’ve never seen anyone do something as brave as you just now, Minister. I sent off the troopers. Let’s get to the ship before they come back.”

“Hold on,” said Kobjin. “You’re an Imperial. Why are you helping us?”

“Because it’s the right thing to do.” said Adeg firmly. “You need a pilot.”

This is an intentional reference to Poe's rescue in The Force Awakens. Adeg only appears in this chapter and the next, but I can tell you that after escaping from the Arkassos fiasco (say that out loud, it's fun) he joined up with the Rebellion as an A-Wing pilot, married one of his squadmates, and had a child after the war who was kidnapped by the First Order at a young age. He and his partner were some of the first Resistance members.

“We’ve got to deal with them or we’ll never get out of here alive!” Adeg insisted. “Alright, Minister! Start firing!”

Com looked at the gun controls as TIE lasers bounced off the viewport. “Where’s the stun setting on this thing?”

“Are you kidding me?!” Adeg exclaimed. “Just shoot them!”

...

Com swerved as soon as they penetrated the clouds, veering away from their pursuers in the opaque mist. The thunder was deafening now. The cabin lights flickered. Com weaved between thunderclouds as lightning beat the forward deflector shields. Adeg looked over at Com as he navigated through the maze. “Are your eyes closed right now?!”

“Trying to concentrate,” Com grunted.

“Wait, they’re what?” Kobjin shook the back of the pilot’s chair. “Keep your eyes open! We’re flying through an atmospheric maelstrom right now!”

“I know,” Com snapped. “Let me focus.”

“Can’t you pray and look where you’re going at the same time?” demanded Adeg.

I don't have much to say here except these are my favorite bits of comedy in the whole chapter. Never fly with a Force-wielding pacifist if you value your sanity. Also—

“Back?” Adeg sputtered. “Back to Arkassos?”

"Why does everyone want to go back to Arkassos?" XD

I think I'm going to ramble about Book II in a reblog!

[menalez]

Hi Mena. This is gonna be long. I'm an 18 year old girl and it's been a year since I'm utterly unable to study. I've dedicated my childhood and most of my teen years to studying mostly, to the point where I barely leave the house for any other reason than to go to class and school. My elementary school was especially vicious even though there was no need for me to spend most of my childhood studying to the point where my homework wouldn't end even at night. I was insanely stressed because the amount of homework they gave us was so much that I'd call my friend 6, and yes 6 times a day to make sure I haven't missed any homework. Teachers at elementary would usually take advantage of the quiet students' lack of self confidence and unconditional politeness to be absolutely vile to me and quiet students like me. They'd legit passive aggressively or aggressively lecture me for an hour for something I had no part in and was done by my other, more confident and vocal classmates who'd clap back at the teacher if lectured. Once one of them beat me and my friend up for using the restroom at the same time. No we didn't goof around. We just used the restroom and came back...and she gave us the permission for it!! Students were vicious to each other and even more vicious to me as I couldn't stand up for myself. That's my fault, but anyways. I do not know if I should blame the teachers, but some of them visibly self harmed in our presence and now that I'm older, I realize they had sadistic tendencies too. But I don't think that's their fault. I hope they're doing better now.

Fast forward to high school, the homework was still too much, still had shitty classmates, but at least they didn't attempt to murder me twice. But teachers were excellent! They didn't try to bond with us or have heart to heart talk with us about anything. Didn't try to act like we're their children. Didn't pretend to care about us. Didn't do "tough love" or whatever the fuck that means; they just didn't let anyone disrespect them and that's it. Didn't act like they owed us anything other than teaching. Didnt try to teach about morality or religion. They'd teach, help us with our academic problems, and then just leave. It might sound bad, but I don't care. I loved my teachers for being teachers, for being good at their jobs, not more or less. I'm still in contact with some of them and they are absolutely awesome. I told about my experiences in elementary school to my classmates and they told me to stop midway because it upset them. That was when I understood what I experienced wasn't normal.

In Corona, our online education was basically torture as it lagged 13 times per session, so I had to study on my own. Now the school is finished. I haven't had legitimate education for I suppose two years now, and I'm actually privileged to not be one of the girls in villages who can't and couldn't afford the technology to be connected to the exams at the very least, and had to give up on education. My heart absolutely goes for them, but I'm powerless.

But still. I'm struggling, and I'm tired of hiding it. Being a student was most of my identity. It was and is more important to me than being the daughter of my family, or being a sister to my little sibling. That was my most important identity. Please tell me how I can go back to studying the way I did? Im overwhelmed by bad memories when I try to study and I struggle to breath. I can't stand the sight of books anymore, and I'm being shamed and called lazy for it. I can't enjoy the subjects I used to enjoy. I didn't sacrifice everything that I did to be a jobless woman who will have to rely on a culum who will legally have the right to my body and more than half of my life choices under the law. Actually, my father, despite being very misogynistic on a lot of instances, cared about me enough to have a heart to heart with me and tell me what's up, instead of trying to marry me off and tell me it's safe to rely on men. He was honest with me, he told me as it is, and his biggest fear is me relying on my potential SO, and I'm privileged for it.

Now...how do I get back to studying? Do you have any suggestions? I can't bring up my issues anymore because it's used against me to justify barring women from education, while boys can unashamedly drone about their struggles with school.

your reaction to studying honestly sounds a lot like your former experiences with education deeply traumatised you. bad associations, what sounds like panic attacks, being flooded with negative memories… that’s either trauma or anxiety rooted in trauma. if seeking a therapist to help break these associations and instead associate positive things with studying is not a possibility for you, then i guess you’d have to break that association yourself. the way i’d suggest doing that is to break it down to very small steps. if you can’t stand the smell of books, would you be able to stand the smell of certain books or some papers or sth else? or perhaps have books around you (the kind u can smell) & do something positive & that u enjoy while smelling the scent of the books. this’ll at least help you not associate the smell of books with something deeply negative. the same can be said for other aspects, like if studying itself is automatically associated with negative memories for u is it possible to perhaps break down studying into very small sections, ensure you do it in a happy + safe environment and reward yourself before, after, & in between the study session? while doing these things, it also helps to write yourself notes about how it felt, if negative think of how you could think of the situation differently or feel better about the situation. if positive, make note of that too bc it’s good to show urself that its nothing too bad nor out of reach. basically i’m suggesting that u try to condition urself into associating studying with positive things rather than the very negative experiences you’ve had. it’s hard to do it on ur own, but it’s possible. trying to be consistent with this pattern and with the positive things you make the situation better with can help. besides that, practicing mindfulness around it can help. for example just dedicating some time to focusing on a book (look at it, hear the sounds it produces when u flip it and such, smell it, feel it… can’t taste it for obv reasons). while that sounds boring & dumb it can perhaps make u also associate book smells less with negative things.

those are the tips i’ve got off the top of my head but honestly it’s probably easier to find a therapist who perhaps specialises in therapy against phobias (such as exposure therapy) bc they generally can figure out how to break it down into smaller steps (better than i can at least dhdhshs). if thats possible id advise that above u trying to do it alone (requires a lot of discipline which i personally do not have & strength too). idk if that helps and i cant think of any other tips so if anyone has better advice.. pls feel free to help here 😭