#but otherwise i was BEGGING for more ports

[just-absolutely-super]

speaking of feedback, the other night i did capcom's mmbnlc survey and highkey begged them to port the mobile games

[doctor--malpractice]

How dare you keep all of this in the tags

(´･ᴗ･ ` )

[prophecyofwinter]

Se Riña Qilōni Iprattan Se Jēdar | IV

Aemond Targaryen x Reader

Summary | Saera Targaryen daughter of Jaehaerys I ran away from Westeros to escape her fate. 45 years later her daughter Y/N Targaryen, with invitation from King Viserys wishes to go back.

Tags | Slowburn, TargCest, Smut, Standard ASOIAF content, Aemond and Reader are First Cousins Once Removed, tags to be added

Prologue | Chapter III | Chapter V | Masterlist

Chapter IV | First Day of the Rest of your Life

“Pull yourself together and present yourself properly. This is my mother, the Queen. Do not make anyone regret allowing you here.”

His voice shocked you, the way he gripped your arm shocked you. Nothing like the way he caressed your hand and spoke low compliments into your ear less than half an hour before. You’ve done nothing to offend him and yet he’s holding you like a parent scolding a child. Looking at his expression all you can read is a slight annoyance, otherwise it’s a look of indifference.

Allowed? You were not ‘allowed’ you were asked, if anything you allowed yourself here.

“Release me! Is this how guests are treated in Westeros?” You say through clenched teeth roughly tugging yourself out of Aemonds grasp.

If this is how it shall be, so be it.

Aemond looked shocked by your sudden aggression, a momentary slip of his mask. His jaw tightened and let out a huff like a little boy.

“I am treating you far more kindly than what others will. Heed my advice.” Aemond ends the conversation there by knocking on the carriage door with the back of his hand, not breaking eye contact.

The door opens and Aemond moves to leave first, extending his hand to help you out of the carriage.

You take his hand hesitantly, there is no other choice for the sake of appearances.

You gaze up once you are standing on solid ground and without obstruction you see the Red Keep in all its glory. The red stone and towers that blocked the sun to the point where you were surprised the town didn’t spend most of the day in darkness.

Your mother told you many stories about her nefarious ‘activities’ she got up to while living here. Of course for most of these you spent covering your ears and begging her to stop.

Aemond linked his arm with yours, leading you forward across the dirt floor of the courtyard. You stopped your gawking in favor of looking towards the Queen. You haven’t seen many people with red hair before, it must be common here. She holds herself with impeccable posture, something your mother would imitate to mock Westerosi women for their piousness.

“Welcome to King’s Landing, Y/N, I hope the journey went without trouble. I know the sea can be moody this time of year. I’m glad Aemond got you from the port in one piece.” Alicent greeted you with a soft smile. You could see her eyes glancing over your clothes. It made you feel as though you were standing in front of her naked.

“Thank you Queen Alicent, I am grateful for the invitation. The sea has treated me well, as has Prince Aemond.” You gave a curtsy to her, gripping Aemonds bicep harder. You could feel every function in your body working at full speed, embarrassing yourself is your worst fear right now.

“Thank you, my Queen.” The armored man next to Alicent spoke up. He was clearly a guard of some kind, with black hair, facial hair, and a judging expression directed at you. “You live in Westeros now, she is your Queen.”

A silence fell over after the man’s words, both Alicent and Aemond gave him a short glance of confusion while you froze up.

“Oh, I didn’t mean anything by it I swear-“ You said trying to save yourself.

“Do not worry sweet girl, Ser Criston meant nothing by it. He is just bothered that Aemond is late to his training session. Why don’t I take you while Aemond trains?” Alicent steps forward to rub your upper arm and give a slight tug to signal you to let go of Aemond.

“That would be very lovely, my Queen.” You smile and relinquish your hold on Aemond in favor of standing closer to Alicent. She begins walking expecting you to follow, and you do. While walking you glance back and notice Aemond staring back at you while walking his own way.

—————

Alicent makes small talk with you about small things like foods from Essos, what Volantis is like, how your mother is fairing and so on.

The halls of the keep are long and filled with many trinkets along the way. You gaze out the windows when you pass by, you can see a rather large forest within the walls and out another you see the ocean with a garden with gazebos and walkways. The scent of fresh flowers passes through your nose making you feel relaxed.

“Excuse me my Queen. As much as I love this tour, I am rather tired from my voyage.” You say trying not to sound rude but you were feeling really tired. Alicent so far has been kind so you thought it would be alright to request to be shown your quarters.

“Of course you are. I don’t mean to keep you for much longer, but first we must get you checked by one of the Maesters.” Alicent said while leading you down a cobblestone staircase deeper into the bowels of the keep.

You hadn’t even realized how far down you were, surely this was the last level of the keep with windows. You knew exactly what she meant. Your face started to heat up and your heart was beating fast just by the premise.

“By getting me checked, do you mean…”

“Checking to make sure you’re still intact. Unless that is an issue…?” Alicent stopped at the bottom of the steps looking at you from the side, her demeanor unchanging.

“No of course not! It just sounds… uncomfortable.” You twiddle with your hands to ease your nerves. You can’t quite think of a word to describe how having an old man look at your most intimate area makes you feel. If there is even a good word to use.

Alicent, seemingly happy with your response, begins walking deeper down the stone hall and you walk fast to catch up.

“Maesters are men of the faith, they have no care for intimacy. They have seen hundreds of women. Our current Maester helped me birth all four of my children and will help you birth yours.” The way Alicent explains it makes sense but, men without desire? Every kind of man everywhere has visited a brothel at least once, no? You shake the thought from your head for your own comfort.

She stops at a wooden door and grabs the handle but doesn’t open the door.

“If it helps I will be in the room with you.” Alicent gives you a small smile and opens the door. You follow her in, trying your best to not let your gaze wander to the floor.

“Maester Mellos. I believe I informed you some time ago I would need you to make sure Aemonds betrothed is intact.”

You saw what you had expected to see, an old man dressed in bland clothing. The shelves lined with all kinds of medical devices and other things you couldn’t even guess the purpose of.

“Ah yes, I do remember. Have no worries I have been doing this for longer than you’ve been alive. I even saw your mother for a time.” The Maester went on for a little too long. You don’t think you needed to know that last part, everyone knows how that went.

You were guided to remove your lower small clothes and lay on the table, resting your head on a pillow. Alicent assured you it would only take a moment. Still, you laid there with your hands clasped together digging your nails into your skin. You began to count the pieces of stone on the ceiling to ignore whatever was happening on the other end of the table.

“All is well on this end, perfectly intact.” The Maester stood up and declared his final result. The second the words left his mouth you instantly got off the table and moved to put yourself back together.

“Fantastic news, thank you once again Maester, that’s all. Come Y/N.” Alicent states bluntly and once again begins to move without waiting. You rushed to finish putting your small clothes back on and chased to catch up.

————-

“Your chamber is fairly close to Aemonds, there should be no trouble navigating between rooms once you are wed. Two handmaidens have been assigned to you, they will wake you in the morning and make sure you’re dressed.” Alicent stood by the door while you wandered around your chambers, checking out every square inch.

“This is more than enough! I don’t even know how to thank you for your kindness, my Queen.” You walked up to Alicent with a big smile on your face. Everything was perfect, you could almost forget the hectic day you’ve had. There was even a wide balcony that looked over the gardens.

“It is just one of the many duties of being Queen. I fear I’ve kept you far too long, get some rest. I will send for you in the morning.” Alicent said before taking her leave, leaving you alone in your chambers.

You fell back first onto your bed and let out a big huff. You pray you made the right decision, who knows when or if you’ll go back to Volantis. You can’t expect to be liked instantly, being legitimized won’t change much if you don’t make the effort. You can already tell Prince Aemond and Queen Alicent aren’t too fond of your origins. Alicent is very good at hiding it which you can at least appreciate.

But, Mental crises can wait until tomorrow, you’re too tired to tackle that beast.

Simply too tired to put on any clothes to sleep in, you strip everything you are wearing and climb into bed. Rolling around in the new found comfort of such a big bed, it even had sheer curtains that made you feel even better. Sleep takes you quick, dreams of food and wine take root in your mind.

The first day of the rest of your life has come and gone.

——————

🏷️: @toodlesxcuddles @blackgirlmagicforever @yourwonkywriter

[night-dazai]

hi i need a ada dazai x reader x beast dazai smut please ;-; or otherwise with the same idea except that it's Chuuya x reader x beast Chuuya smut I'm eager to read and I love what you write I would be happy if you can write it 🙏

I have a feeling both Beast Dazai and Port Mafia Dazai might be similar in some senses here is the link to what I wrote of dazai X Reader X Port Mafia Dazai. I will mostly be writing this in headcanon form and not a storyline. ( cause too many ideas that way and I am already too late in answering this request sorry😭😭 )

I just loved these requests I did not know why I did not do them before !!!🥳😅

Dazai X Reader X Beast Dazai : 

Both looked the same at the same time not the same, the time travel machine which brought both you and your ADA detective lover “Weird never knew there would be a day I would see someone like me with a lover “ Beast Dazai scoffed scanning you from head to toe. 

It was going to take some time for your friends in the other universe to fix the machine and take you two back but that did not matter here. The Dazai were fixated on making sure they stayed at the port mafia headquarters. 

Your lover broke down a little when he first saw his dear friend Oda point a gun at him thinking he was beast Dazai but after escaping from him you were busy comforting your lover by riding him. 

“Osamu~” you moaned hands on his shoulder while he buried his face in the little space on your neck not looking at you and it had been like this for a while “Please look at me “ you would beg. 

Legs giving out and pleasure fading due to your slow moments “Hurry y/n” Dazai said not lifting his face. You thought he was crying but he was feeling a lot more inside “Please I feel scared look at me “ you said and this time losing all patience you grabbed his hair with a harsh tug pulling his face from your neck where red bruises adored your skin. 

Wet eyes, heart-shattering look, mouth quivering and biting his bottom lip Dazai looked at you, your heart squeened very painfully. All thoughts about your pleasure flew out of the window you wanted him to feel safe and loved not like this. 

You have never seen him like this, but now that you have seen him like this you don't like it “Please… he did not know, Oda would never do that you know right ?” you said rubbing your soft hands on his checks as he nuzzled his face “ mhh… I do ….he hated me y/n “ his voice quivered and shook. 

That's it you bounced a harsh one making him hiss and look at you confused “You only see me now, only me “ you said pushing him onto the big black bed and started moving again. Your legs hurt but you did not brother. 

Seeing your determination just made the man choke up more but holding your hips he helped “Harder love “ he mumbled as you both were near the end, the room door opened with a bang “What the hell happened I hea–” Beast Dazai paused capturing the scene in front of him. 

Dazai quickly got up making you lose your balance but his hand held you in place “You…” he said while you scrabbed and hugged your lover tight “Now now …you sad huh ?” Beast Dazai asked seeing the looking at his other self. 

He knew the feeling, he knew it better than anyone and he would also like to forget it, closing the door he removed his coat “I am sad too..” he pouted in faux affinity. You looked at your lover worried about this new development, it has been 4 days since you both came here and now what is this ?!

Your lover said nothing and moved inside letting his other self climb up behind you naked and rubbing his dick on your soft ass” mhh�� you whimpered feeling your lover thrust in while the other clutched your breasts and twisted your nipples. 

Beats Dazai groaned in an animalistic way making you shiver but soon you found yourself mouth stuffed with your lover and the other self pounding into you at a rough pace. 

Your neck hurt and your back arched in the most breathtaking orgasms that they pulled out of you taking trunks to pound your pussy. It was not very different but Beast Dazai had a certain roughness your lover did not possess ( or so you thought ) and that had you feeling very different. 

After hours of helping both of them feel had you pass out in the middle to wake up to both of them on either side of your bed. 

In the next 3 days, your friends fixed the machine and you were back to your universe, but sometimes you would think about that night asking your lover to get rougher with you. 

“You can .. it won't hurt, “ you said shyly while Dazai contemplated your new requests, “ finally I can be…no I can easily hurt her it is not good, “ your lover thought and shook his head “Bella it is easy for me to hurt you and I won't like it “ his voice filled with concern and love. 

But driven by lust and hunger you shouted “Then do it ! For heaven's sake what am I a little kid huh !” you shouted pushing your hair behind annoyed. But before you could open your eyes you were flipped and on your stomach hands held tight on your back and Dazai dangerously close to your ear “Then don't complain later “The soft and sweet warmth was gone, and the cold brutal tone made you shiver with anticipation “ yes sir “ 

“That's a good girl “ Dazai smirked at the new awakening of you which just turned out to be more advantageous for him.

Chuuya X Reader X Beast chuuya : 

There won't be many differences between both of them in the style of fucking, both are rough but sweet. 

But one thing is for sure if you are dating anyone of them they would be more focused on making sure they did better than the other. 

His dick hitting parts that you had no idea but now painfully going near your cervix you shouted for him to slow down. But a hand held your neck and pulled you up “Who is better ?” Beast chuuya asked in a sexy voice which almost made you feel like you could cum on his voice alone “Feels good …..good” you mumbled. 

Mind all hazy while the other chuuya using your ass smacked it and kissed you glaring at the Beeast chuuya, it felt so good. 

You did not like the idea of getting shared but here it's chuuya and chuuya and you feel good so it does not matter. 

Unable to breathe due to the intense kiss you squirmed gaining a smack on your clit “Stay still slut “ Chuuya mumbled while Beast chuuya chuckled “Oh yeah, think you are better than me ?” he challenged.

This made the other redhead thrust harder and faster, your whole body shook and jerked with the intense force. Ass and clit red and puff a little painful from the hard thrusts into your ass and cunt while each focused on ripping out as many orgasms as they can give you as your milked their dicks dry “Harder.~~” you mumbled. 

Chest and neck filled with red and purple bites “Pretty “ Beast chuuya said running his hands over your chest and pulling your nipples with a harsh tung getting a whimper “Good doll “

Both of them chuckled seeing your fucked out face and state of mind where nothing other than a dick was all you wanted “Yes doll “ both said at the same time, surprising each other but soon smiled “I think we can find out with the number of marks tomorrow as to who is better “chuuya said. 

“Challenged accepted “ Beast chuuya said smirking, leather-gloved hands held your neck “Heard it doll, you better tell us “ 

[thatdeadaquarius]

Friend. F r I e N d. Your smol brother Razor hcs made my insides flippyflop. I beg, I plead...

My daughter QiQi? Holding onto my sleeve while we go picking herbs so she knows she can get home? Getting her a little bag with a notebook and pen so she always has memory?

SAYING THE LINE FROM WHERE THE WIND LEADS AND ASKING FOR A HUG?!

Scolding Baizhu for letting her go herb picking when he knows she probably won't remember the way home?!?! Because Archons man like NO.

Hello!! Flippyflop??!! Over my writing ??!! 🥺🥺 <3

AND FOR MY NEXT TRICK... WE SHALL DO... THE OTHER CHILD THAT NEEDS A CARING ADULT!!

Also srry im rlly slow getting to yalls asks i promise it will come and i love u all for giving me asks <33

(*´▽)ノ✨️ NOW LETS GO ! ! ✨️

(Now before yall come at me, I am aware Baizhu does care about her, but BUT, he still is studying her/canonically has ulterior motives, and lets her pick herbs when she may not be able to find her way back, also he doesnt strike me as the type to be super affectionate/parental, as cute as it is to write him that way)

What a b l e s s e d ask, this is so cute i love all the kids in genshin their adorable

So... im kinda a consistent Sagau writer, and i love requests like this! But also, im not sure if u guys want me to still apply Sagau/Isekai setting to these requests on top of what was initially asked??

So i will pretty much always make all requests will be SAGAU/ISEKAI Reader based, UNLESS YOU STATE OTHERWISE IN THE ASK!!

Oh Qiqi, another child product of ✨️traumatic events✨️

(Future me after finishing this: oh god what monster have I unleashed upon the world, upon the sagau tag, upon my innocent followers...)

Damn ur lucky u didnt land in Jueyun Karst or nothin

Or on one of the many mountains/cliffs all over Liyue

Its honestly more a shock u arent on a mountain bc theres so many,,

Ur pretty close to Liyue Harbor luckily, not in town, but sort of at the base of Mt Tianheng by the looks of it, almost behind it

Its about sunset too, WOW

Liyue Harbor is hella bigger than in game, holy fuck its actually a huge port city

Should u go into the city??

Ur not sure, do they speak English??

...Wait u dont got a single mora

U cant even get an inn rn RIP

?? Should u just? Find a cave?? To sleep in??

But what about monsters??!

(Call Xiao? Nah he'd freak tf out on u, Shenhe maybe? She is the only option u can think of that seems like she would possibly take in a random homeless traveler from another world, mostly bc she could beat ur ass no matter what)

So,, Shenhe? Maybe? Ur still not sold on the idea but maybe u could gather something out here to sell on a street corner?? Or to Wanmin maybe for fresh ingredients?

Yeah sure why not,

With that, u just wander around the area, checking out all the plants and animals

The fennec foxes are so adorable

Oh shit some mint and sweet flower, finally

Oh hell yeah a sunsettia, u got food now 💪

U hold onto some of it to sell (including a low violet grass hell yeah)

Crunchin and munchin ur way thru Liyue now, it isnt until u find a particularly wooded area that u hear ur first sign of human life

...

Stand corrected,

Unlife...?

A soft hum, almost a lullaby, comes from Qiqi as she picks up other flowers youve never seen before (ooo new liyue plants)

Should u just leave? She seems busy and u dont wanna distract her bc she might forget to go back to her task..

Wait a minute.

On the other hand,

Now you can finally achieve one of your many goals in Genshin that you couldn't as a player.

Help Qiqi collect herbs and guide her back,

And scold Baizhu. >:)

.

(whats he gonna do?? call the milieth on you??? for some rude person who doesnt like the way he makes a child wander off, who has memory issues and cant find her way back??? thats what you thought)

.

Approaching the tiny zombie girl, you purposely step on a branch to let her know ur there

...she doesn't even flinch, instead she vvveerrryy slooowwwlllyyy lifts her head up from her bent position

Her big doe eyes 🥺

They dont look empty, or dead just kinda dreamy

She tilts her head, the adepti paper covering an eye

Qiqi: "...do I know you? ..you feel... familiar..."

Oh this is crazy, she sounds exactly like in game, but instead of in a screen, her voice is in front of you

You respond "Oh I don't think so?" You introduce yourself,

"Are you alone out here? The sun is setting..."

It didnt strike you until now, but the zombie girl is so... so... tiny

OMGGGG😫💘

I mean, you knew the kids were small, but not 5-6 year old small!!!

Qiqi stands, and you see her holding a basket in the crook of her other arm, full of greenery

(some u recognize like violet grass, horsetails, but others are completely new, wow u gotta wander around Liyue after u find somewhere to sleep tonight to check out how much more fleshed out it is irl...)

The little cryo user is the picture perfect image of sweetness 💝✨️

The paper falls to the side, and both of her gentle pink eyes look up at you (💔)

Qiqi answers slowly, "...I messed up my routine, I forgot to get herbs this morning...so I couldn't make the medicine for today... I'm getting them now instead.."

She turns to the right, then left, and blinks a few times (💔💔💔)

She kinda looks like she forgot the way back,, you figure you might as well ask

"Do you want help getting back to town? The pharmacy right?"

Qiqi looks back at you, and nods, "Okay...thank you..."

And

And!!

She takes YOUR HANNNDDDD 😫😫😫💔💔💔

Her small fingers are cold, and they wrap around only two of your fingers

SOBBING

Trying to hold the squeal inside urself, you turn and begin to walk off together, following the path around Mt. Tianheng into town

♤

HELL YEAH QIQI TIME LETS GOOO

After hearing about your homeless situation, Qiqi and Baizhu offer the guest room for the night, also partially as a thank you for helping Qiqi (thank fuck theyre that nice)

After talking on the way over,

Turns out that Baizhu lives just out of town of Liyue, (not found in the game, was is it with not showing characters houses...) that way he has some greenery around his house, and has a garden out back :D 🌱

Baizhu just gets this strange familiar feeling from you (it almost reminds him of,, seeing a regular customer that has been to see him hundreds of times...) that convinces him to offer you a job at the pharmacy, in exchange for living in the guest room for awhile ! ! WOO

MISSION 1:

FIND SOMEWHERE TO SLEEP + GET A JOB, COMPLETED

♧

Now MISSION 2:

GET MONEY, GET FOOD, SCOLD BAIZHU, LOVE QIQI

Literally on the first day out ur like,, Baizhu.

My boss, my friend, my buddy, my homie, my guyyyyy

U gotta let me go with Qiqi from now on, she will literally get lost hoe. 😐

Tapping ur foot at him and everything,

He's a little intimidated tbh bc ur so upfront about it, and agrees

U lowkey shame his parenting (and he actually feels quilty wow)

WITHIN THE FIRST COUPLE DAYS SHE ALSO SAID THIS!!

"Since we first met, I have had a warm feeling inside. Not the kind of warmth that makes me feel rotten. The other kind of warm. The one that happens inside my heart. Thank you. I am happy. Sadly I only recognize the current you. If I forget you... No. I will order myself to remember you."

AHHHHHHHH PERFECT CHILD <333

(Once again, if u read my Razor post, another person who can't quite articulate what you are as the Creator, but just has a feeling about you that ur cozy and safe :')

◇

SO QIQI CANONICALLY HAS A NOTEBOOK ALREADY!!

(U help her press flowers in it to both leave inside as a pleasent surprise when she forgets about them, and attach some to the front 💖)

And SHE HAS A SCHEDULE.

In the morning, she goes herb picking, then makes medicine, and then does stretches at the end of the day before bed

(At least im pretty sure thats it, it was like 3 things so she could remember easily)

ON LIKE,, THE FIRST FEW DAYS WITH HER, SHE STARTS TO FOLLOW U AROUND MORE AND MORE LIKE A LITTLE DUCKLING

And she even says "...I started memory training exercises recently. So don't worry, I won't forget who you are." 🥲💘

◇

Qiqi seemed excited to tell u all the plants u dont recognize and what they do in medicine,

U mostly think that bc she walked and talked a little faster,

her emotions arent super obvious bc apparently her facial muscles arent super flexible... :/

(she later on after she trusts you more, will sometimes let u rub her little cheeks and massage her face to let her have more range, she looks like a content kitten those times 😭😭)

But when ur not out and about Liyue's nature with Qiqi,

U do little odd jobs around Liyue, like dog walking, delivering peoples' medicine, and u even registered w/the Adventurer's Guild so u could take on small commissions :D

U used ur money to buy ingredients to cook food for urself and the household (bc Baizhu cant make anything besides soup and tea apparantly srsly how is this man alive)

And thru a series of trial and error (and consulting Xiangling..)

U made coconut milk!!! ✨️🥥🥛

Qiqi loved. It. Every. Time.

She's not tall enough to reach the kitchen counters w/o a stool, but she can peek her little head over it and put her fingers on the edge, which she does everytime u make it 😫😫🥺🥺

She has a 6th sense for everytime u make it, no matter where she is in the house/nearby lol

It was also one of the things she wrote down in her notebook that she didnt wanna forget LMAO

Next to a reminder that she knows you + other facts abt u, is "can make coconut milk"

You can bribe her with it too lol

QIQI BEST KITCHEN HELPER

Shes already Baizhu's assistant, so she is great at cutting, chopping, and prepping ingredients

She insists on helping u everytime, she'll even delay her morning routine for u to make breakfast <3

(U also make sure to remind her to eat and hydrate consistently, bc thatd be hard af to keep track of w/ memory issues, i would know 💀)

◇

U also used ur money to buy clothes for urself and her!! <3

Also apparently u still have access to the character menu? And ur inventory?? And quests???

U CAN UPGRADE QIQI

(YESS YESSS- MAKE HER THE STRONGEST CHILD IN THE WORLD, GODLIKE STRENGTH THE IMMORTAL UNDYING QIQI AGENDA HAHAHAHA)

(Her outfits show up in her outfit screen!! theres just kinda a hologram button hovering over her chest at all times..)

She seems rlly fond of upgrading her, her weapon, and artifacts bc she likes to be a stronk 💪girl to protect ppl she loves aw <3

(SHE SAID SHE WAS HAPPY TO BE ABLE TO PROTECT U BETTER THE FIRST TIME U ASCENDED HERRRR 😭💘

She also likes to help u out with commissions too, it brings her some variety in her day that shes become fond of!!

(Shes also become fond of you and all the exciting things ur doing)

AND

Ur quests menu is rlly helpful for you but also her!! U just gently reroute her or remind her everytime she needs it :)

(she has slowly gone from asking you what she forgot/what she was supposed to be doing, to just... LOOKING UP AT YOUUUUU FOR THE ANSWERRRR W/O SAYING ANYTHINGGGGG 💔💔💔💔💔💔)

◇

Bc u got jackshit all else to do in ur freetime, other than exploring, u started picking up some hobbies thatll benefit the both of you!

U bought some fabric and whatnot to make Qiqi a backpack!! So she doesnt have to carry around the herb basket anymore

(the ones being sold were too expensive, and werent quite right for her anyway, but u did stab urself enough times that Baizhu gave u bandages..)

You give it to her on her birthday!! (she also remembered yours!! She gave u herbal medicine and a necklace of gemstones she handmade like noctilous jade and cor lapis cries)

It has lots of pockets, bc Qiqi also likes to get interesting rocks or non-medicinal flowers to give you while yall are outside <3

She loves the backpack, u saw her make the

♡tiniest♡

Smile ever, which made it even cuter to see

(She also just, held it to her chest the whole day 😭)

◇

ALSO BC SHE STRIKES ME AS A SLOW BURN TYPE OF PERSON TO LOVE SOMEONE (idk if u get that feeling but thats what it seems like to me esp with her memory needing time to remember a new person, she apparently canonically cant always remember Baizhu's face??)

SO A RANDOM DAY AFTER ABOUT A MONTH AND A HALF, YALL WERE ABOUT TO GO HERB PICKING AGAIN AS USUAL,

WHEN SHE TOOK UR SLEEVE AND JUST,, STAYED THERE THE WHOLE TIME,,

EVEN WHEN SHE WAS HERB PICKING-

🫂🫂🫂

Was that your soul leaving your body? Maybe 🤷‍♂️

But when yall r in a crowd of Liyueans and tourists, she straight up latches onto ur hand like a vice grip

She WILL NOT lose you, and ur holding back just as hard, you WILL NOT lose ur amnesiac child!!!

She likes to come into town with u when u go bc while shes not a fan of crowds, she can deal with them a lot better when ur there 🥺

Plus she wants to be able to look out for you!!

SUCH A SWEETHEARTTT

When u asked why she didnt like crowds the first time yall went SHE SAID

"Some people want to take advantage of me. Others are terrified of me. But you... You are not like any of those people."

QIIIIQQQIIIIIII MY BELOVEDDDD CHILDDDD 🥲🥲🥲😭😭😭😭

(ALL OF THESE ARE CANON VOICELINES BTW EXCEPT FOR YALLS FIRST MEETING AT THE TOP!!!)

♡

Ok so she was already pretty strong before you, but now esp since u started upgrading her-

Qiqi is hella strong and has great stamina

U saw this in action in real time when Hu Tao was strolling down the path near where yall were herb picking off to the side

Hu Tao and Qiqi like... locked eyes-

U were looking down at plants but noticed Qiqi not moving, and looked up to see the most intense staring contest ever LMAO

AND LIKE SOME KIND OF LIKE BIRD OR SQURRIEL WHEN THEY LIKE FREEZE AND THEN BOLT WHEN U ARENT EXPECTING IT THEY ARE OFF LMFAO

QIQI IS RUNNING FOR THE HILLS, ITS LITERALLY INSANE TO WATCH HER BE SO FAST AHSHAKKALDFH

HU TAO IS ALSO FAST BUT LIKE THERES STILL A GOOD AMOUNT OF DISTANCE BETWEEN THEM-

AS U FINALLY GET OVER THE SHOCK, U RUN AFTER THEM LOL

THEY QUICKLY OUT PACE UR SLOW ASS AND UR HUNCHED OVER DYING AND JUST BEFORE THEY GET OUT OF RANGE U HEAR-

"YOU HAVE TO LET ME PUT YOU TO REST, DON'T WORRY YOU'LL LIKE IT DOWN THERE THE DIRT IS NICE AND COLD!!"

AND AN INDIGNANT "No!"

LMAO HU TAO GIVES UP 2 HOURS LATER, AND QIQI WAS LITERALLY RUNNING AND CLIMBING THE WHOLE TIME LMFAO

◇

SO IDK IF YALL SEEN IT BUT THERES A TRAILER OUT ABOUT XIAO i think??

AND AT ONE POINT QIQI CANONICALLY SAYS SHE CARRIED HIM WHEN HE WAS PASSED OUT BACK TO THE PHARMACY 💀

U WERE THERE WHEN YALL FOUND XIAO

it was kinda shocking to finally have ran into him (bc u figured there was no way he would come down to see some rando human, even if u had almond tofu)

AND HE'S PASSED OUT??!!?!?!

Top ten most disturbing images: Xiao face first on the ground, out of it

And while ur like panicking "omfg how tf am i gonna carry this mf all the way back to the pharmacy, omg what happened, oh jesus this is insane its literally XIAO and he's PASSED OUT-"

Qiqi in the background like, "hup"

And just arranges him in a piggyback carry, his legs and arms sticking straight out in front of her, his ass almost touching the GROUNNNDDD😭😭😭

You: *shocked pikachu face meme LMAOOO

◇

I LOVE THAT THIS IS CANON OHMYGODTHIS MIGHT BETHE FUNNIEST SHIT OUT OF GENSHIN LORE/STORY YET

♤

Bonus: Zhongli has been going in-fucking-sane trying to locate where u are lol, Hu Tao literally made him take a few days off bc he was pacing around the harbor so much 😭

He always seems to get to where you are, just as you leave the area (apparently Qiqi's deathlike presence throws off ur very full of life one)

Literally as soon as you landed (woke up?) On Liyue soil, he was hyper aware of you

The other adepti are searching the rest of Liyue just in case ur someone where else

Lol wonder how long it took him to realize u were just workin at Bubu Pharmacy LMAO

Tell me what to write! :) ♡

Reminder: A 100+ Followers celebration POLL!!

HOLY FUCK!!

OML

OMFG

SATAN ON A STICK-

THIS IS SO LONG 😭????? WHAT HAPPENED

THIS THING AS LONG AS A FALL INTO THE ABYSS

HELL-

WHAT THE FUCK

WELL NOW I KNOW WHY IT TOOK ME SO DAMN LONG TO POST ANYTHING FOR A FEW DAYS BC THIS IS A FREAK OF NATURE

I ALREADY MADE THE LAST ONE TOO LONG AND NOW HERE WE ARE CRYING

I hope u enjoyed this fucking monster anon sob-

oh my god im actually shocked you guys, i just scrolled up and down this thing-

I can't even like, flick it once and let it scroll really fast and reach the top u know what i mean?? 😟😰🙂🙃🥲

I just,, i had so many ideas, and as i typed and tried to get them all down i-

uh,, aNyWaY,,, enjoy yalls week guys...😟😃 distantsobbing

Cheers,

🌒🌊🌧Aquarius♒️🌌🌘

♡ the beloveds ♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza

[crowpickingss]

Friend of a Friend

edwin payne x gn! reader

summary: you go looking for crystal and catch the attention of a certain ghost

warnings: mentions of death (coma), otherwise this is mostly fluff

a/n: back with more edwin

—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—

You didn’t have a lot of friends. In your younger years it was Crystal and a few others. But after Crystal started seeing David she was strange. Her behaviour turned sour and you distanced yourself.

However something inside had been telling you to reconnect. One night you had been sitting on your balcony. You lived on the second floor and the people below you were having a party.

One of the party goers was very drunk and threw a bottle into the air. It hit you in the head causing you to pass out and fall off the balcony putting you in a coma for a month.

After waking up you moved out of your apartment and went in search of Crystal. She was the one person you knew that would take you in. However she wasn’t in town she wasn’t anywhere.

You had looked for ages and ages but found nothing. You were at a loss until you remembered the bracelet you gave each other. It had a small tracker in it and was there for emergency’s.

Using the tracker lead you to Port Townsend. You had been looking until you finally bumped into her “Crystal? Is that you” She seemed confused “Do I know you” You laughed “Crystal it’s me your best friend, I know we grew apart but I was thinking we could reconnect” She smiled “Best friend? So you know me” You nodded and she turned to the two people behind her “Crystal that’s brills, hopefully they can help you get your memory’s back”

You looked over her shoulder to see a boy who looked strait out of the 80’s talking to her “Who are these people” The other boy who was wearing a long coat suddenly snapped back into consciousness “You can see us?” You crossed your arms “Why couldn’t I, your Crystals friends” She turned back to you “Ghost friends, this is Charles and that it Edwin” You had heard her talk about ghosts from time to time but you had never met one “Nice to meet you I guess”

Your body’s temperature started to raise as you felt the deep stare of Edwin. Crystal started asking you a bunch of questions and the boys soon wandered off. You couldn’t help but feel slightly flustered after the encounter.

Jenny reluctant let you stay with Crystal until you could figure something out. Crystal begged for you to be able to join the detective agency and Edwin was quickly on board. You and Niko had the same talents but you still added to the agency.

You still felt queasy every time Edwin looked at you. You didn’t understand why his longing stare gave you butterflies. Over time you realised your feelings for the ghost. His sassy and smart personality made you fall head over heels in love.

What you didn’t know was that Edwin shared the same feelings. When Niko found out she was so excited. The last date she had set up didn’t go well but seeing how in love you two were reignited her passion for love.

The date she set up left Edwin an awkward blabbering mess. He would often blurt out random pieces of information that never failed to make you laugh. By the end you both understood the mutual longing you both shared. Edwin leaned forward and kissed you. He didn’t feel it on his lips but he knew deep down it was magical

—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—

[galaxiadreams]

Summer Love <3 (Alhaitham x reader Modern AU)

❦ Warnings: mentions of lack of self confidence(only like once)

❥ Genre: Fluff, romance <3

❥ Word Count: 2,831

❦ Synopsis: Your bestie Yoimiya begged you to go to a summer camp down in Sumeru with her. You were hesitant, at first. But who would've thought a summer camp changed your love life forever...

a/n: Hellooooo!!! This little fic is inspired by my own experience during summer camp. I had a couple "summer camp crushes" and this is kinda of what I fantasied of doing ehehehe. I apologize in advance about the possible grammar/spelling mistakes. Sorry if any sentences doesn't make sense. I'm still trying to learn more about writing! I am also trying out a new format. Please give me any suggestions!

Your best friend begged you to go to a summer camp down in Sumeru with her. You were hesitant, you wanted this summer to be relaxing for once. Go wherever you pleased, and do whatever you wanted. But her sparkling puppy eyes are working far better than you expected and you relented. 

“Pleaseeeee, y/n!!! I know you’re not that interested in ancient runes or whatever. Who knows, you might find a cute guy there! I heard Sumeru boys are a different breed! Plus, it’s at the Akademiya, THE top university in all of Teyvat. You know, your dream school. Maybe this trip there will send a message into the universe to make you get into your dream school!” Dammit Yoimiya, no wonder she’s your best friend, she sure knows the way to your heart. 

....................

After a long boat ride from Inazuma to Port Ormos, you were greeted by lush green grass, warm humid air, and the pungent smell of Padisarahs. A little melody sung by a bird attracted your attention. A Sumeru Dusk Bird. Its vibrant blue feathers gleaming in the sunlight due to the natural oil produced by the animal.The song is both simple and complex, and it stays with you long after you have heard it. Many, like your mother, may find the sound produced by the bird as a nuisance, overly screeching and loud. But you think otherwise, to you, nature is art in its most natural form. Both held complexity and simplicity in its form. Both evoke deep emotions within you.

The trip from Port Ormos to Sumer City wasn’t too long. But upon arriving, you couldn’t hold the gasp of admiration upon seeing the city before you. Sumeru, the city of wonder. Where nature and cityscapes blend seamlessly. Skyscrapers that reach the sky are embellished with green, lush plants. Trees stood tall and proud, shading the bustling citizens beneath.

You took a deep breath and smiled, this unexpected trip to Sumeru might be a good one.

....................

That’s where you meet him. The grey haired quiet dude from your Ancient runes summer camp council group. 

The first day you arrived at summer camp, you were enchanted. Sure, boys from back home were nice, but ohhhhhhh boy. Yoimiya was right, Sumeru boys are something else. You couldn’t help but feel all giddy when it was announced that he would be in your little council group with Yoymiya. Gosh, it felt embarrassing almost. You just learned the guy’s name, Alhaitham, after a little icebreaker and introduction. Hell, the two of you only have been breathing in the same room for merely 10 minutes. He was a total stranger, and you were totally crushing on him. You can’t help but feel shallow. 

Kudos to Yoimiya, she read you like an open book. The moment Alhaitham walked into the room she gave you a sultry glance. She knew your type well. When lunch time came, she made it her life mission to find a way to make you sit with Alhaitham. That “life mission” was extremely easy to accomplish. All she had to do was befriend Kaveh, who was introduced as Alhaitham’s childhood best friend, another hottie in Yoymiya’s opinion. 

♡ The Akademiya cafeteria is a large, open space with high ceilings and coloured lights shining through ancient stained glass windows. The noise level is deafening, with the sound of hundreds of students talking, laughing, and eating. The combination of strangers and loudness was making you lose your appetite.You watched Yoimiya, Kaveh, and a couple of new acquaintances chatting animatedly, and you felt a pang of jealousy. Not of Yoimiya but of the conversation they’re having; your introverted ass can’t hold a proper conversation with a stranger for 2 minutes, and here is your best buddy beaming at something stupid Kaveh said. Sometimes it makes you think you bore Yoimiya. Sighing, you sneak a glance at Alhaitham sitting across from you, he has a handsome face with a strong jawline, and high cheekbones. His porcelain skin made his turquoise eyes shimmer in the light. The deep glow of red-orange hue near his pupil creates a contrast that reminded you of the unison of the forest and desert in Sumeru. You watched his eyes move to absorb every single word in the book he was holding…you were getting butterflies, but the butterflies plummeted when those eyes flicker to yours. You quickly averted your gaze towards Yoyimya and Kaveh, the heat of embarrassment painted your cheeks a cheery red. You promised yourself that you were not shallow, and you vowed that you’re not a hopeless romantic.

The next few days were filled with teasing from Yoimiya and Kaveh (that freaking girl couldn’t keep her mouth shut). The two of them made sure you and Alhaitham sat together at all times. Yoimiya went as far as refusing to partner with you during activities in order for you and Alhaitham to work together. As you become acquainted with Alhaitham more, he becomes more comfortable with you. He’s not stupid, he notices all the shy glances and blushing cheeks when the two of you are together. Especially the obnoxious, oh-so not obvious suggestions made by Kaveh.To be honest, he’s not new to this behavior from women. The guy knows he’s attractive and he has been on various blind dates orchestrated by Kaveh himself (Alhaitham only relented on the condition Kaveh would stop pestering him about it). At first, Alhaitham wasn’t quite interested. He found your seemingly “secretive” glances rather uncomfortable, annoying even. But what piqued his interest is your love for physics and Astrophysics. Alhaitham is quite well-versed in this field, and this is the first time he has heard anyone claiming the want to pursue physics. 

♡ “Y/n. It’s your turn now, two truths and one lie.”  “Well, I had thought about this for a while now. Ahem— I choked on a peach pit as a baby and nearly died. I want to have a career in Astrophysics or a major in physics. I have a pet tarantula named Benny boy,” Yoimiya let out a loud laugh upon hearing your statement about the spider, “and Yoimiya is not allowed to answer.” The girl gave you a teasing grin and pursed her lips. After your group failed to answer correctly, you gave them the lie: You had a pet tarantula named Benny Boy. You were deathly afraid of spiders, if you had a personal hell, it would be filled with those nasty creatures.  As your council group walked towards the courtyard for recreation time, Alhaitham surprisingly struck up a conversation with you.  “You said you’re interested in studying physics?” “Oh yes, it’s rather a new interest that I’ve decided to pursue only recently. After the whole being an actress thing fell apart”  “Hmmm, and you said you want a career in Astrophysics?” You were surprised he even paid attention to what you said. You nodded in response.  “Well, I have a family member that teaches Astrophysics at the Akademiya, if you’re really interested, I could introduce you to them.” Alhaitham offered, while opening the courtyard gate for you.  “Oh heavens really? That would be great!” You smiled at him. Goddamn, that smile of yours caught him off guard. Your smile was like the sun, warm and inviting. It lit up your face and made the excitement in your eyes sparkle. After finding a seat by a marble bench under a giant Adhigama tree, the two of you converse all there is about physics and your interests, from string-theory to philosophy to art, Alhaitham never met someone so knowledgeable and opinionated about some of his favorite subjects.

After that late afternoon little discussion under the Adhigama tree, you and Alhaitham opened up to each other. Hell, you even started to make some physics jokes with him. Celestia must’ve placed a curse on him, because he started to look forward to talking to somebody, he wanted to talk to you, he wanted to be with you. Yeah shocker, the seemingly antisocial genius wanted to talk to a girl. What’s even worse for Alhaitham, is that he started to feel nervous being around you. He was never nervous around anybody, whether it’s strangers or the freaking Grand Sage, he never felt this strange fluttering in his stomach. What’s even more uncanny for him is that he found himself staring at you on multiple occasions. When a conversation ends, he would usually return to his books, but since he met you, he started to leave his books in his dorm. This way, he could listen to your voice, and see you smile. This has to be some curse, Alhaitham thought, he even tried to convince himself that you’re not all that great. But those are just futile attempts, there was something enigmatic about you. It’s hard to notice for the common eyes, some might even describe you as plain and average. But with Alhaitham’s sagacious eyes, he could see right to your soul. Alhaitham was bewitched, you’re the one that placed this curse of infatuation (perhaps even love) upon him. Through all the secret glances and “accidental” hand-touching enacted by both you and Alhaitham, the final bouquet has arrived. 

♡ You took a deep breath and tried to focus on the positive. You were feeling rather melancholic considering this will be last night you’ll be spending in Sumeru, the city of Wonder, where you met new besties for lifes and became an official ambivert (according to both Yoyiyma and Kaveh, two renowned extroverts). You couldn't help but smile as you stared at the reflection staring at you in the mirror. You wore a flattering green dress, it was made of a soft, flowing silk fabric that swayed with your movements. The colour of the dress brought out the e/c in your eyes and made your skin look even more radiant. You wore your hair down in loose waves, and your makeup was simple but elegant. White pearl earrings and necklaces completed your looks. As long as Yoimiya is here, you’ll always manage to look like a princess. Soft Sumeru music played as you and Yoimiya walked into the cafeteria. The usual loud, squalor of a cafeteria was transformed into a beautiful forest with soft fairy lights hanging from the tall stone ceiling. Plants, flowers and the soft light from candles placed upon the tables gave the most peaceful atmosphere possible. “Good evening.” Alhaitham's voice was deep and smooth. You whipped around to face the tall man behind you. He is wearing a well-tailored suit that fits him perfectly. His broad shoulders were enhanced in the black material. His hair was also styled, the usual strand of hair covering his left eye was slicked back.  As per usual, he had a confident and clamming demeanor, and he made you feel flustered immediately. You can’t deny the literal rizz radiating off of him.  “Good evening, you look really good by the way.” you complimented, why is it so hot in here?  Alhaitham smiled a little at the compliment. The reserved scholar felt his cheeks warming up a little. In return, he pulled a chair out for you, gesturing for you to sit. Shocked, you quickly sat down and thanked him. You were screaming inside, a man with manners and chivalry is making the butterflies swarmmmmmm. Alhaitam took a seat right next to you and filled up the fancy wine glasses for the both of you.

“How was your day?” He inquired, while taking a sip out of his drink. He initiated the conversation first, you noticed gleefully.  “It was alright, except for the tower building exercise. Can’t believe that Haypasia girl tripped and fell on our group’s tower! We would’ve been first place if she watched where she was walking!” You complained jokingly, Alhaitham chuckled at the disaster that occurred earlier today.  The two of you conversed throughout dinner, but you couldn’t help but notice how your elbow and his were touching the entire time. You wanted to assert dominance and didn’t move away, it seems he had the same thought. He didn’t move either, Alhaitham only leaned closer to you while talking. His eyes barely left yours while the both of you talked about life and dreams. One of the most attractive traits about him, besides literally everything, is his voice. He spoke with clarity, it's the kind of voice that makes you want to listen to him talk for hours. When he speaks, his words are carefully chosen and delivered with conviction. He has a way of making you feel like you're the only person in the room.  When the banquet ended, there was a surprise slow dance outside in the courtyard. When the organizers of the summer camp announced for everyone to find a partner, your e/c eyes immediately found his turquoise ones looking at you just the same. Alhaitham cleared his throat and held out his right hand.  “Would you like to have this dance with me?”  “Of course. I would never reject you.” You laughed and held his hands in yours. His warm calloused hands sent electric shots through your body and his. His eyes widen at the softness of your hands. Your already smiling face beamed when you saw his sudden red cheeks and bashfulness. The waltz music started, and the two of you swirled to the beat, Alhaitham taking the lead. The two of you weren’t afraid to stare into each other’s eyes. This is the first time you experienced what time stops truly meant. Alhaitham couldn’t help but sigh, it wasn’t a sigh of annoyance, but a sigh of endearment. The blue light of the full moon lit your perfect face, the gleaming of your pearl earrings made you an angel from heaven. A gift from Celestia just for him. Alhaitham was lost in a whole different dimension with you, to the young scholar, only the music, you, him, and the moon existed at the moment. Was this love? The both of you couldn’t describe this feeling that suddenly blossomed in your guy’s chest; it was this faint struggle of breath combined with a weird sense of yearning. It was truly indescribable. This continued throughout the whole waltz, the music only brought the two of you closer, closer, and closer. Both of you fell from heaven when the dance came to an end. Your heart skipped a beat when you realized how close you and Alhaitham were, both your noises were touching, you could feel his breath on your lips. “Eeeeeek! Just kiss already!” an excited screech made you pull away from Alhaitham. Yoimiya was with Kaveh and a few other campers with her phone on record in her hand.  “Oh by the way Alhaitham, me and Yoyimya recorded the whole entire dance! Ehe!” Kaveh grinned, pointing towards his own phone in his hand. The whole crowd all erupted in loud cheers and laughter. 

When it was time to say goodbye, Alhaitham didn't want to leave. Both of you guys didn’t want to leave this secret paradise. He asked for your contacts and if he could see you again, and who are you to say no. Plus, the two of you would be attending the Akademiya in a couple of months, imagine the excitement and glee in Yoimiya’s eyes and cheers when you told her you got into the number one University in Teyvat. You received the acceptance email right after the dance that night. Alhaitham walked away with a smile on his face (which is unnerving for Kaveh) knowing that he had met someone truly special. 

....................

You leaned your elbow against the window frame as you stared out at the sun setting beneath the endless ocean. The sky was ablaze with different shades of orange, pink, and purple. It was a breathtaking sight, and you felt lucky to be able to witness such beauty and art. The colours in the sky grew more and more vibrant as the sun disappeared, it was the perfect way to end a day. You turned your head to a sleeping Yoimiya hugging your arm. The sunlight brightening her features, you chuckled at your best girl and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Your head rests against the cool glass as you look up at the very first star that has appeared that night. A single white spot on a tapestry of orange and pink, you kept your focus on the sky as more stars appeared to embellish the darkening sky. The hum of the engine on the boat rocked you to sleep as you sailed home to Inazuma. The last thought you had before leaping off to dreamland was of a certain grey haired male and his luscious voice. At that moment you decided to embrace the fact that you’re a hopeless romantic, because as crazy as it may sound, you knew you just found your soulmate.

[quinloki]

If the Kink Ask thing is still open can I get 1.Threesome (and if the third being a male or a female would change their rating) 2.Humiliation and 3.Body worship (receiving) with Crocodile, Kid, and Katakuri?

Oh You may, you very well may indeed ^_^

This should be relatively easy too cause I've got pretty solid head canons for these three =D <3

Let's go by... hm... Kink on this one.

Threesome:

Crocodile - I dunno - I made brief mention of this in the Double Penetration ask with Crocodile. It's a mix of possessiveness and also a mix of not trusting many people to see him vulnerable like that. There's one or two people he'd be okay with at most, and he wouldn't be terribly motivated to bring it up or admit to any possibilities. Every delicious sound and squirm you make is for him, but if you need to be stuffed he'll build/buy/create whatever can bring you that satisfaction.

Eustass - With other Kid Pirates - FUCK Yes. Outside of the - rather not. The Kid pirates are, to me, very close knit and also very physically close. They've been each others comfort and support and defense against an unbelievably cruel and useless world and they certainly take pleasure in one another emotionally and physically. Being a consummate kinkster, punk and quintessential dom Eustass is here for whatever boundaries/suggestions you have. He'll try most everything more than once, and for sure him and the crew have had sex with islanders when in port, but once the lines of more defined relationships start to form up it's a little different.

Life on the ship has a natural inclination to polycules, which would take 5 miles of string and half the length of the Red Line to map out properly. The crew keeps it all sorted, but gender wouldn't change anything amongst crew mates. Outside of the crew Eustass would have a preference that whoever it was, was at least a professional. Otherwise it's just too complicated and he doesn't care to deal with it.

Katakuri - Rather Not - Katakuri isn't keen on being seen in any manner of vulnerability in general. I can see him being a sweet and understanding partner to his spouse, and hey, if Big Mom had pushed a second spouse onto him, then who is he to argue with her? But outside of something like that I can't see him being game for it. Despite his sweet disposition, I do think he's fairly possessive on top of it. He might share his donuts with you, but he's not likely to share his donuts or you with anyone else.

Humiliation:

Crocodile - Sure - If that's what you want, he's fully capable of obliging. Crocodile has verbally decimated people for years, while he wouldn't turn his venomous tongue on you without severely good reason, he's happy to provide such a service to you if you so desire. It's not something that he would suggest or offer up himself - maybe dabbling in it a little during a punishment session, but once you ask for it, he'll provide it.

And the massive amount of aftercare that will be required once he's done.

If your bend of Humiliation includes an audience, it's one of the few times he's willing to "share" you. But he won't allow anyone else to join in - to console you or otherwise.

Eustass - Yes - Eustass' brand of humiliation is physical and verbal, can easily involve a crowd - strangers even - if it's a hot button for you, he'll press it randomly and often. Heaven help you if he realizes it turns you on before you tell him. He loves to see his partner squirm, specifically loves being the cause of it. Your only saving grace is that he'll respect any safe words and boundaries, and his aftercare game is on point.

Katakuri - I guess - Karakuri plays the big bad meanie almost constantly, so it's not on the top of his list to direct that farce in your direction. If you beg him, he'll acquiesce at least a few times. His advanced observation haki lets him calmly and precisely decimate you verbally and/or physically with relative ease.

But don't expect enthusiasm. Katakuri doesn't really like being the big bad.

Body Worship:

Crocodile - Yes - Ah sweet little desert flower, if you want to worship his body he won't stop you. The sweet little kisses and soft warm licks feel good, and even if you don't do that well, he's still sure to reward your effort. Practice makes perfect, and you'll figure out the best ways and places with time. He's not going to help you, watching you worship him is a pleasure, there's no need to rush it. You'll learn everything eventually, and until then not a single kiss or touch will be wasted or unappreciated.

And his appreciation of you is as vast as the desert itself.

Eustass - FUCK Yes - I mean, he already knows he's a god, so don't let him stop you. Look, look, you need to do this in a way without calling it worship. Alright? For your own sanity. DO NOT TELL THIS COCKY BASTARD THAT YOU'RE worshiping HIM. Just like, tell him you want him to lay back and let you appreciate him. Explore him. Lavish him with kisses and such. The word worship should not leave your lips.

Even without the qualifier he's all in for it. Eustass will happily revel in the pleasure of it. Maybe not for too long - once he's calmed down, or relaxed enough, or gotten riled up enough, he's going to move you both into something more physical, and far more rough. He'll appreciate the worship, but he get pleasure from your squirms and sounds more.

Katakuri - Oh god you don't even know - Poor Kata has body issues galore, on top of the stresses of being the big bad older brother. Lavishing praise and attention on his body will probably cause him to error out a few times before he adjusts to it. He won't even know what to say the first time you suggest it, or he'll freeze up if you begin to show your appreciation in the heat of the moment. He was just happy to know you weren't afraid of him, and now you're lavishing him in attention and pleasure.

Cuddling had probably been the highlight of his week the first time you snuggled up with him. But it's adorable how much his face flushes straight to his ears, and how his body twitches and shifts under the soft pleasure.

Kinky One Piece Head Canon

[dragonagecompanions]

DA2 crew reacting to Hawke who stops caring? Maybe after the death of Leandra they just stop showing any kind of emotion? Not even rage or sadness it's as if they're made tranquil but without the need to be cut off from the fade instead, it's their emotions that are cut off. When they finally ask Hawke they simply shrug and respond with

"Why do I care? Everyone leaves me or they want something from me only to stab me in the back, why should I care anymore?"

Just, just pure angst heartbreak something that will hurt I BEG FOR THE HURT JUICE!

WELCOME TO THE JUICE BAR! HERE THERE BE ANGST!

Varric: He gets it. For most of the time, amongst the odd band of friends he has made in the City of Chains, Varric puts on a very convincing show as the devil may care rogue with the world at his fingers and no weight on his shoulders.

But on the nights when he is not walking through Darktown killing...well, anyone who crossed their path really, it was hard to maintain the mask. When the last drunken drunken warbler had left or past out or otherwise left the Hang Man silent in the wee hours even his tavern rooms couldn't keep the echoes at bay. Brother, father, mother, ancestral culture and society; all of it gone before he was even respectably middle age. He'd lost Orzammar before his first breathe, and no matter how in the Merchant Guild he climbed no surfacer would ever be anything less than a casteless outcast.

Normally that didn't bother him, but on the heaviest nights...He can't bring back everything Hawke lost, and isn't fool enough to try. But he can be a friend, a port in the storm. Once Hawke's mindset is known Kirkwall's resident story teller makes it his mission to be a constant bulwark for his friend. He has let them flounder for too long-- dwarves might not be great at swimming, but Varric will not let Hawke drown.

Bethany: It takes a long time for her own bitterness, at a life of endless hunger and exhaustion and nightmares of a Grey Warden that she would never have chosen for herself, to fade enough for her sibling's silence to truly register. Their mother's death had been a terrible blow, a severing of the last parental bond, but it had also heralded a silence from Kirkwall that...

Well, that she had come to take for granted. Varric still wrote like clockwork, his letters a comforting and humorous glance into the city that had been home so briefly, but after more than a year the remaining Hawke sibling looks up to realize she has had not a word in months. Her last letter was so bitter, penned in grief and anger and without thought for the child who actually had to see and bury Leandra, but now those caustic words eat at her own mind.

Distance has bled off the pain, and the missive that goes to the City of Chains is almost meek in comparison to her fiery words. But the letter she receives makes silence preferable-- she can feel her sibling's desolate apathy through the short penned lines, and for once she aches for the cramped paradise of Gamlen's hovel when their family was mostly whole.

They do not write again, and in her shame and sorrow she does not ask them to. A Grey Warden is meant to leave all their former life behind, and yet somehow her older sibling has managed to cut loose of those bonds-- and Bethany finds herself clinging to a life that she cannot save.

Anders: Justice roils, unsettled and uneasy at the terrible symmetry. There is no sunburst scar to mark the sundering of mind and fade, no judgement rendered to murder life and emotion, and yet tranquility would almost be preferable to the empty aching sorrow. Hawke had always been a vibrant soul, built for purpose and life and determined to make their way in the world no matter the cost. But this...

There had been a time when Anders had been that alone. The loss of friends, of family, of the chance to have a life of his own. Even the freedom of the circles had still left him chained to another institution, no matter how preferable the Grey Wardens might have been. Isolation was a like an unhealing wound, pulling at the body and soul until there was nothing left to fight it. A sepsis of the soul, where no surgeon's blade could cut it free.

There had been no true isolation since Justice had come to him; it feels like a betrayal to admit he missed it.

And oh Anders wants to comfort his friend, tries to be there and sets aside (as much as his fracturing mental state will allow) the conversation of mages rights for other conversation. Brings food and wine and tries to rekindle that spark that had always been in Hawke's soul.

But his plans for the Chantry -and the looming betrayal that must carve them apart once again- keeps a pall of guilt over those efforts. It seems crueler somehow -infinitely more so if they are in a romantic relationshiip-to build up only to destroy, and so knowing he cannot help one of his first true friends in the city is another burden to lay against the cost of mage freedom on the scales of Justice.

Isabela: At first she brushes it off as a bad day, nothing that a trip to the Hanged Man and the Blooming Rose can't clear right up. She's had a few of her own, after all, and knows the liberal application of lover and libation to be a perfect solution for gloomy moods. Friend or lover, she knows how to raise the spirits.

But when that doesn't work, when her efforts are shot down again and again in that same terrible, dry tone, something distant and awful howls in the back of her mind. As the captain of a ship she is good at watching for storms and reefs, for the dangerous shoals that can render a ship little more than kindling or the hurricanes that turn even the greatest ports into unsafe harbors. There are no maps to nagivate here, no sounding charts or sextant readings to guide her to calmer waters.

She has looked death and danger in the eye with laughter and a ready blade, but the dull and distant apathy in her friends eyes shakes her like no nautical challenge ever has. They tetter on the crest of a wave, and for all that she might scramble for control the trough might be too much for them to weather. Emotions have never been her strong suite, commitment not in her wheelhouse. Isabela is shallow and vain by her own admission, made for the life at sea and not meant to drop anchor forever.

But when she takes a heading, she takes it true. It will be work, work the captain is not at all sure she is capable of, but in all her long life Isabela has never abandoned a crew member gone overboard. And even if Hawke is determined to struggle against joy and life and recovery, she will not let them drown.

Aveline: It is so, so tempting to lay pain for pain. To compare the loss of home and husband and life against the inevitable (if untimely) loss of parent, the grief of lost siblings and broken friendships to the struggle of proving herself to the guard. Who are they cut themselves off from those who love them, when no one is untouched by loss?

But the simple and terrible truth is that pain is a terrible equalizer, and lays low all who come before it. Aveline has fought for her position as a guardsman, and then guard captain, and is proud of her duty. But she is also too well aware that the burdens laid at her desk are nothing like that of a Champion of a city, and that Kirkwall has for years asked far more of Hawke than it has given in return. Her friend has never waivered, never failed in their devotion to a city that never stops taking.

Her own rise in station comes of both her work and theirs, and with a pang Aveline is suddenly unsure if she has ever let Hawke know how deeply grateful she has been for their friendship-- from that first day in Ferelden onward.

It is not in her nature to look back and regret on mistakes that cannot be fixed, or dwell too much on old sorrows. With Donnell's help she can only move forward as a better friend, a better companion. To make sure Hawke knows without question that they are loved, and to guard them and their future as she does the city they will build it in.

Fenris: Everything he touches, it seems, must be laid low.

There is no question that his social skills lack a certain...polish, nor that on the whole Fenris and society are mostly estranged. He in content to live in his decaying mansion, to make a life devoid of company when not traipsing through Kirkwall with a ragtag bunch of friends. He does not seek out company often, is not comfortable with the idea of the vulnerability that friendship requires with more than a handful of people.

It does not occur to him until Hawke's empty and apathetic words that those actions and attitudes might hurt more than himself. Hawke has been a better friend and compatriot than Fenris ever dared to hope for, certainly better than he had the right to ask for, but his actions have not been equal to that friendship. He has let them suffer alone, or at least mostly unsupported, and that is...

It hurts like the Fog Warriors hurt, needless betrayal when something better might have been.

There is a cold blessing in the memories of a life enslaved being ripped away by the lyrium, even if the experiences after were hardly kindness itself. But Hawke must live with it all, the pain and betrayal and the crushing isolation that comes with duty. Fenris has chosen to be alone, at least, in his self imposed solitude.

Hawke has no one.

It is a bitter vintage of guilt, particularly for a romanced Fenris who has done more than most to cause such pain. But he has not come so far in life without being tenacious, and commitment to a goal is keen to success. If he must finally leave the mansion behind, to spend everyday with his friend until that sorrow is as distant as his life in Tevinter, than it is a sacrifice worth making.

He will bring the good wine--it stands up well to despair.

Carver: There is a sort of inherent loss of self, when you have a twin. For all that Bethany and he had been different people, it is at times unavoidable that you be lumped together by even your family. It is rarely malicious but often very annoying, and was in some ways the catalyst for how much he envied his older sibling's singular triumphs and failures. There was no one to share that spotlight with, and it burned at something deep within Carver's soul.

The bitter grief that came when Bethany was gone, gone and leaving him with no one to lock step with, did not lend itself to mending the hard feelings for his older sibling. While not so cruel as Leandra to lay blame at the eldest Hawke child for his sister's death, her absence creates a void that neither can ever truly fill.

Time heals some wounds, of course, but distance and duty can cauterize what has not yet healed. Leaving his life behind to take the oath of a Grey Warden is perhaps the most freeing thing he has ever done, and if it is easier than most to carve away his past life...he is well named for it. That is not to say that the news of his mothers death does not pain him, but his new brothers and sisters a balm in a way family has not been in the past.

It is cold comfort when Varric's letter, with the uncertain request to write to his sibling in an attempt to ease their pain, makes them uncomfortably aware that years have passed without correspondence. Somewhere between the Deep Roads and his duties the oldest Hawke sibling ceased to be a daily thought for him, and Carver is ashamed to realize that he was relieved when the letters stopped. He does write a few stilted lines, unsurprised to receive no reply, and tells himself he can do no more.

If his father's face haunts his dreams with imagined disappointment and grief for months after, let that be penance enough.

Merrill: If Clan Sabrae still lives she will find it difficult to relate, but if Keeper Marethari's actions have cost her so much more than Merrill is painfully aware of the pain of total isolation. Hawke does not even have the eluvian to compensate their struggles, and for a time the Dalish mage is unsure how to help.

So she simply listens. Even if it is apathetic silence, or quiet sorrow, or even howling rage, Merrill stays. Her friend has never abandoned her, not in all the time she has known Hawke. Their life has been a bitter one, with duty and grief and helpless loss too mich a companion. Nothing she can do will fix the past, but she can prove to them with the consistency and patience of her presence that they are not alone.

The introduction of baked goods to that listening and support is also, in her experience and delight, a helpful tool. Among the Dalish shared food is the foundation of family and community, and in time she will use it to bring hope back to her friend.

Creators, let her succeed.

-Mod Fereldone

[boltlightning]

james + elizabeth ft. number 76 pls

76. i want you to have this request me a drabble!

It was an accepted ritual at the Swann household that a dinner with Captain Norrington was followed by a game of cards. A table in the parlor was reserved for this purpose, four chairs perpetually set aside; and when the team composed of Governor Swann and his steward Cooper grew tired of losing game after game, James and Elizabeth modified the rules of whist to accommodate the remaining two people.

With the elevated strategies came elevated stakes—in lieu of gambling for money, James would lend Elizabeth books from his library that were otherwise deemed too uncouth for the Swann library, primarily naval strategy and local histories. Governor Swann turned a blind eye, and so the two continued their campaign to make a relaxing game stressful until their schedules became too busy to allow for such a distraction.

Years later, they sit in an inn on their return journey to Port Royal, a war having been fought, an evil having been defeated, and Elizabeth returns to their table with a deck of cards. She sets a single shilling on the table and passes James the deck.

“Here.” She sits across from him and steeples her fingers. “Deal.”

James begins to shuffle the cards automatically, his eye straying to the coin. “You have spent too much time with pirates,” he accuses, “if we have finally graduated to betting money.”

Elizabeth smiles wolfishly. “The night is young, James. Who is to say what will be put on the table?”

With each trick, they up the ante. They wager coins, at first, but slowly become more creative, even with their attire and equipment in such dire straits as they are now. A pocket knife, a whetstone, a rusted locket pilfered from who-knows-where, James’ neckcloth, Elizabeth’s earring, a promise of a round of rum—and the grand prize, a Haywood novel Elizabeth had apparently begged off a woman in the market that afternoon.

“You planned this,” James says, thumbing the last card in his hand.

Elizabeth holds her card with both hands close to her chest. “Some memories stick with you,” she says. “It would not be a proper game with James if we did not have some novel at stake, would it? And besides, it is not looking too likely you will read it anyhow,” she adds, peering at their respective won tricks. She clearly leads by a huge margin. 

James does not grant her the satisfaction of following her meaning and feigns confusion. She scoffs and sets down her card, leaning back with satisfaction as she takes the last trick.

“You are the unluckiest man in the entire Caribbean, James,” she declares.

“I will not argue that.”

They tally the score. Elizabeth does her best to reign in her dignity as the results become clear: she has taken the most tricks, yes, but of the wrong suit. James has won.

“It seems I, for once, am not the one providing the literature,” he says, with a wolfish smile of his own.

“Perhaps you have not considered that I wanted you to have this,” she returns tartly. “You can read it to me on the next leg of our journey.”

“It would be my pleasure, Miss Swann,” he says. He reaches across the table to take her wrist, squeezing gently. “I wish only to serve.”

The sudden sincerity in his voice makes Elizabeth pause, her breath catching. She holds his gaze for a long moment, eyes wide—then swiftly pulls away, clearing her throat as she gathers the cards back into a stack.

“Oh, if that is your form of gloating, it is intolerable. You shall not throw me off the war path,” she says, already shuffling again. “Another match?”

[insanitize]

tetris cd-i rant from 4 months ago (imported from cohost)

One thing I've continually noticed about games made for the CD-i is that they were very unique and occupied an aesthetic crossroads between "video game" and "dvd menu" that I have seldom seen replicated. I think there are many consoles out there whose individuality and uniqueness in their own right encouraged developers to think creatively and come up with experimental and interesting projects. The Dreamcast, Gamecube, Playstation 2, Saturn, and Wii all come to mind for me, but I don't think the CD-i receives enough consideration for this. There's just something about games made for the CD-i that, even in all of their documented jank, exude artistic passion for me.

All of that in mind, what the FUCK is going on with the CD-i port of Tetris?

I need you to look at this thing. I need you to see it in all of its bizarre, emotionally intense, deeply fascinating beauty.

I need you to understand that these backgrounds move. These are not still images. I need you to direct your attention to the fact that this overbearing, seemingly large monolith is clearly intended to be physically present in the scene, as an object in the real world that you're interacting with. I need you to know that in other levels the Tetris Monolith casts a visible shadow on the ground.

I need you to hear the OST.

I have never seen anything quite like this before nor do I expect to see something quite like this ever again. I'd go so far as to say I'm kind of frightened. How deep a chord this has struck within me. I feel as if there's a story of something well beyond human understanding occurring here that we're only seeing watered-down snapshots of. The lack of actual story is perfect in this regard. We don't have to explain to you what this strange Tetris object inhabiting various parts of the world is, otherwise it would be less Tetris. You're here to play Tetris, don't bother asking what's going on here. I feel almost like these things are alive. Like Tetris is a species and this is what it looks like. Strange appearances of huge black slabs with famous game "Tetris" playing on them suddenly appear worldwide. I'm losing my mind a little bit. Imagine finding one of these in the field out by the river.

Imagine finding one of these in the field out by the river, long after your group has gone far up ahead of you and you've trailed behind too far to find them now. Imagine seeing it for the first time and after a minute, warily coming up to it. Imagine it asks you for a name (for the score, of course). You don't know what it's for, you make one up. Imagine it just starts a game of Tetris at you. Imagine you play it. Imagine the end screen is just coordinates to the next Tetris. Imagine it's somewhere close, so you drive out there. Imagine you find it and it already knows your name. Starts the next game, ends, leads you to the next Tetris. Imagine the more it does this, the longer the travel distance is. Imagine you're at the point that you're flying across the planet to go track one of these down and seeing such beautiful sights along the way. Imagine taking note of the fact that they're only ever waiting somewhere serene and scenic. Imagine so desperately feeling the need to figure out what awaits you at the end of this journey, if it indeed does ever end. Imagine having to take a boat out to some remote patch of land to find this last beach scene.

Imagine the game ends. There's nothing for you. Imagine there's no reward or closure or any explanation whatsoever as to what all of what you just did meant. Imagine breaking. Imagine you've spent over a year of your life now searching for these just to come up on nothing, no mystery to be solved, or perhaps worse, a lingering mystery yet still, now with no hope of being brought to light. Imagine falling to your knees in the orange-bathed sand, hands curling into fists over the black void. Imagine hitting it, defeatedly. Imagine begging for something from it, for an answer to any of your questions. What were you playing for? What is your reward for playing? What is the point of its existence? Yours? Why are these things here? What is their goal? Why pick Earth? Why pick you? What are these things? What is this that you're sitting in front of? What even is it? After a brief moment, you hear a faint hum from somewhere deep. Imagine you look up.

That's all it says. "TETRIS". You just sit there, silently. You suppose it technically did answer your questions.

Or maybe I'm insane. This is also possible.

[esta-elavaris]

Fallen Through Time

Part Ten [2,428 words]

An AU of my completed, 400k+ word fanfic Catch the Wind [AO3], in which Elizabeth, not James, is the one to discover Theodora Byrne after she crash-lands into the world of Pirates of the Caribbean.

Page breaks by cafekitsune.

Also now on AO3 and FF.net.

Masterpost - Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five - Part Six - Part Seven - Part Eight - Part Nine - *Part Ten* [you're here!]

Tag list [let me know if you want to be added!]: @missfronkensteen @teawithshakespeare @dancerinthestorm

The books gifted to her by Captain Norrington ended up being a blessing in more ways than one. Yes, it was a relief to see that they were finally on good terms, and that she was at least somewhat sure now that she could talk to him without walking into any unknown bear traps set by his suspicious mind (a good thing, too, because her next course of action would’ve been to serenade him with that one Elvis song, and it would’ve never worked). But the books themselves offered her a way of getting out of the house without being doomed to wander and loiter under the scrutiny of every person who happened to pass by.

They still scrutinised, of course, but at least now she was much too absorbed in the words under her nose to notice them. It also meant she wasn’t stuck with the dilemma of whether to return their stare with one arched eyebrow until they became embarrassed and looked away, or to suddenly pretend to find some aspect of the scenery very interesting until they removed their gaze of their own accord. The former solution was a fun little game to play if she was feeling combative, but it wouldn’t win her any friends.

So, on a few mornings a week when Elizabeth was otherwise occupied with the convoluted minutiae that went into being one of Port Royal’s leading ladies, she would slip out after breakfast – a packed lunch of her own making in hand, as well as Norrington’s books. It was as close as she could get to the concept of simple pleasures, seeing as she sorely lacked the ability to go out and buy herself a mocha followed by a trip to a book shop, but it was much closer than she’d have been able to get without Norrington’s help.

For that, she was grateful. She had much to be grateful for, of that she was fully aware – especially since the reality of her situation sank in, and she stopped feeling like she was wandering through a very strange, and alarmingly lucid dream. Luck had played a big factor in her circumstances. After all, she was not begging on the street, as she might’ve been stuck doing if none had found her. She hadn’t been branded a pirate and hanged, as she might’ve been had Norrington found her. Her biggest worry was passing the hours and preparing, mentally, for Jack’s arrival – and that was a rosy prospect when compared with fears of starvation or lack of shelter.

It wasn’t so much that she doubted her ability to get by under duress, but it was nice not to have to. She’d certainly have no time to sit beneath palm trees by the sea reading books in that world – and it proved such a distraction that she didn’t even notice Norrington’s approach until his shadow fell over her.

“Good afternoon, Miss Byrne,” he eyed her like he wasn’t quite sure what he was up to.

Then again, that had long become his habit – and she was quickly growing used to it.

“Hello, Captain. Is it afternoon already? The books were more of a blessing than I could’ve guessed – I’ve been absorbed since morning,” she said.

“I noticed,” he said, his eyes flickering in the direction of where the Interceptor sat in the water a ways off.

“I’m not sitting right in the middle of another notoriously un-sound site, am I?” she asked, bemused by the admission.

“No – not at all, I…”

Then, though, he must’ve realised the implications of what’s he’d said – like he’d been watching her, for he cleared his throat and continued.

“You’ve gotten through it remarkably quickly,” he nodded to the copy of Meditations, now sitting amidst her many skirts.

Realising she was probably being rude, she made to rise but he stopped her with a gesture, considered her for a moment, and then slowly – reluctantly – lowered himself down to sit beside her. “Even for one who can read.”

He made the joke watching her closely, like he was half-worried she wouldn’t find it funny at all. But she did, not least because it surprised her, and she breathed a laugh.

“I’ll probably read it a few times before I return it to you. Just to save me treating your house like a library I’m not actually banned from. I have to ask, though, am I robbing you of your lunch break again?”

“I seldom take it. Not to eat, in any case – I find it slows me down,” he denied. “Although I see you brought yours with you.”

“I won’t be the idiot who tries to explain the importance of good nutrition to a military man,” she snorted, glancing in the direction of the half of the sandwich she had not yet touched. “Did you like the one I made you? I didn’t know if it was weird of me, but I wanted to do…something, and my resources are limited. Seemed to defeat the point if I was just having the Swanns do something in my name.”

“It was confusing – the dish, not the gesture. That was unusual, perhaps, but the sentiment was appreciated all the same.”

“It’s quite clever actually,” she replied. “The bread lets you eat without your hands ending up covered in food – so you can eat while you work. Or read, in my case. So I won’t be returning your books with greasy little fingerprints all over them. A good on-the-go meal.”

Although side-stepping the name – just in case the Earl of Sandwich was a good friend of the Swanns – felt a little awkward. As she explained it, though, an odd sort of change overcame Norrington’s face, and then he cleared his throat and made a noise that was caught somewhere between a laugh and a cough.

“Oh.”

“Oh?”

“That��makes more sense.”

“Makes more sense than what?”

“It’s no matter,” he shook his head.

But Theo was like a dog with a bone by that point.

“Don’t tell me you deconstructed it.”

His lips thinned, and she had to remind herself that this was not the sort of man that she could joke around with like that. Groves, maybe, but not Norrington. Then, however, he surprised her by sighing and admitting drily.

“I’m unused to meals that are supposed to come with a set of instructions. A product of my time at sea, no doubt, where dining is altogether simpler.”

Theo laughed, mostly because of his surprising willingness to talk nonsense with her.

“That’s not true – I’ve seen the amount of lobster and crab served around here. That’s an obstacle course disguised as a meal.”

He smirked, bowing his head as he did so as if to hide his mirth. But it shone through in his words.

“Dangerous words, Miss Byrne. They’ll see you uninvited from every dinner party in the port.”

“Do me a favour and repeat the story, then. Loudly and for all to hear,” Theo grinned, a twinkle in her eye.

Although with that said, she feared the topic was steering towards the less than fun time she’d had of it among Port Royal’s best and brightest, so she picked up the half of the sandwich she had not yet touched.

“Here. My eyes were bigger than my stomach. Have it, or it’ll go to waste.”

“I could not rob you of yours.”

“I’m not hungry – and considering how you thought the last one was supposed to be eaten, I’m amazed it wasn’t taken as an act of Irish aggression.”

He sighed, and then eyed it. “You’re sure?”

“Absolutely.”

Relenting – much to her surprise – he took up the sandwich from the cloth she’d wrapped it in, eyed it, and then took a bite. Theo picked up her book and opened it at the page she’d marked, pretending to read it more than actually eating it. Nobody liked to be creeped on while they ate.

“I’ll admit, Miss Byrne, that I am glad I relented and gave it a second chance,” he said after a few minutes.

She looked up with a little smile, finding a chunk of it gone as he considered the rest. When she next glanced to the Interceptor, she found a few of his men by the nearest rail, turning their gaze in their direction every now and then. Looking back to Norrington, she expected him to make an excuse to quickly leave, but instead he appeared unimpressed at worst, and then spoke again.

“What passage are you at?”

“What? Oh- erm,” she picked the book up, suddenly feeling just the slightest bit nervous as she opened it.

So much had been made of her ability to read, it would be embarrassing now if she arsed up the words and proved herself to actually be illiterate, wouldn’t it?

“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment,” she read.

At first he was silent, and she wondered if he was just busy eating, but when she next looked at him the sandwich was still in hand, and he was hesitating rather than chewing.

“Do you disagree?” she asked – although she didn’t think he did.

“No,” he admitted readily enough. “But it seems a poor consolation in your current circumstance.”

“Not at all,” she said, and then faltered.

Not because she didn’t know what to say, but because there was a lot that she could say on that score. Her earlier thoughts on how lucky she’d been, on how much worse everything could be. And then there were the constant reminders she firmly gave herself over and over – that her wits had gotten her this far, not only in Port Royal, but in life. What point was there in not trusting them now? When she needed them most? As she dithered, he finished the sandwich, apparently content not to rush her.

“I’ve been lucky,” she settled for. “The only distress that I’ll find here is that which I’ll unleash upon myself – if I decide to be all…fatalistic about everything. Speaking of, actually, there’s another bit here. Accept the things to which fate binds you, but do so with all your heart.”

There was a bit in the middle that she’d carefully omitted – and love the people with whom fate brings you to. The last thing she needed to do was read that out and have him think she was out here husband-hunting, of all things.

“It hasn’t been a difficult thing to accept. Compared to the other, more likely scenarios that could’ve played out. Drowning, becoming shark food…washing up elsewhere.”

“The latter is markedly less disastrous than the previous two.”

“I washed up into the lap of kind folk,” she snorted. “That’s rare. I really beat the odds. I’ll tell you what, though, I’ll never take up gambling in my life – I think I’ve used up all my luck for life since coming here.”

“I shan’t argue with the logic if the end result is wise,” he said drily. “But on that note, I must take my leave. And thank you once again for feeding me.”

“You provide the food for thought,” she brandished the book. “It’s the least I can do.”

He snorted as he stood and bowed his head in farewell – regarding her strangely, albeit with another one of those reluctant chuckles, when she saluted him in parting.

As James went about his duties for the rest of the day, Miss Byrne was never far from his mind. Even if he’d found her intolerable, he would have still gone to speak to her – for he saw no other course of action. If Miss Swann was right, and he was beginning to suspect her way of thinking was much more on the mark than his original line of thought, then Port Royal’s newest resident, then he knew that Miss Byrne would only confide in him (as a role of authority here) if she saw that he truly was amicable. When he wished to be. Sometimes.

Admittedly, none could ever accuse him of being personable, but he was at least fair. He could be turned to in a matter such as this, to handle it with whatever delicacy was required. There were no delusions in his mind that they would become great friends, nor that she would more readily confide in him over Elizabeth thanks to something such as friendship, but she had to see that he was a trusted figure - one that would protect the good folk here. And it was looking more and more as if she was one of those good folk. Strange, perhaps, but good.

All of this was true, and all of it was sincere. It was just a somewhat surprising after-effect that he did not find her intolerable. Even as he'd been perfectly prepared to go to her and bite his tongue through all manner of inanities, solely in the name of building a rapport that would prove useful later. In fact, the more they spoke, the more he found himself strangely enjoying her company rather than merely tolerating it, or putting on a show of finding it entertaining.

Throughout the rest of the day, he attended to his work aboard the Interceptor, readying it for their next voyage – a short one, merely aimed at maintaining peace and safety on the surrounding waters rather than rooting out any ill-folk. As he did, though, he found himself repeatedly glancing in the direction where she sat beneath her tree, never once looking up from the book.

Towards the end of the day – when a warm, glowing afternoon was beginning to fade to a cool evening – he looked back to that same patch, deciding that if she was still there, then the gentlemanly thing to do would be presenting an offer to walk her back to the mansion, as a matter of safety…and found himself feeling oddly disappointed when she was no longer there. And that ran the risk of becoming rather dangerous indeed.

[ikemenomegas]

Rock Paper Scissors

It's been almost six years since bsd started airing, and I decided to go back to season 1 after watching the season 4 premier last night and reading the latest chapter (best Wednesday of 2023 so far).

It's been so long I forgot that Atsushi's entrance exam starts with Kunikida and Dazai playing rock-paper-scissors

Where Dazai wins every on of the three rounds and sends Kunikida to crawl around on tables and tackle Tanizaki. We don't assume from this point that it's a manipulation, only that it's typical comedy or maybe someone being very good at guessing the other person's body language.

By chapter 105, we've seen Dazai manipulate his way into impossible situations before, and once again playing a game with a partner in front of a supposed life or death situation.

This arc has exposed a lot more of what is Dazai's more serious and less performative side of his personality than the other arcs before. We know he, through Mori's training, is a master at game theory and pragmatic strategies. Even after working with the ADA for nearly three years by this point* Dazai manipulations in preference to explaining, even distracting his own coworkers from what work he does behind the scenes in order to prevent them from worrying and/or keep his movements free from scrutiny.

*(time gets wishy washy in bsd, but Atsushi has been with the agency for quite a few months by where we are in the manga and all the light novel things apparently take place between what we've seen from the anime and manga so far. With the events of even the Hunting Dog arc to now stretching nearly a month or so, I estimate at least eight to nine** months since Atsushi's recruitment to now, even without much seasonal change, simply because there is otherwise too much going on with the light novel missions included, but that's not necessary for the meta)

**amendment after reviewing events through overthinking, it's more like 5-6 months max given Akutagawa's promise, which I forgot about. The timeline does make Dazai trying so hard to save Atsushi's life in the Guild arc more poignant, it's really a mentor choosing a new apprentice to take care of and it makes how the rest of the agency operates around Atsushi during the cannibalism arc also make more sense)

It's sort of fun to realize that in the first few chapters, Dazai's hand was hidden. What's maybe even more fun is getting a "glimpse behind the curtain" of Dazai's scheming. We know he plans for a lot of scenarios, he reads the flow of things in Yokohama and predicts likely scenarios from small bits of information.

Even Ranpo says that he's hard to deal with. Ranpo sees a lot more than most people do, he probably has most of the same information Dazai does a lot of the time, even if he doesn't necessarily have the context for it (having not spend time in the city's underworld).

Which maybe again begs the question of why Ranpo and the Agency have struggled so much against the Decay of the Angel. Fukuchi might have more resources, but so did the Port Mafia and the Guild. Dazai technically beat Dostoevsky during the Corruption arc even if Dostoevsky might have been expecting the scenario.

Fukuchi's sword sort of means he can see a few seconds into the future, but he still has a harder time beating Fukuzawa, who from what we've seen is probably the better swordsman in every sense of the word since Fukuzawa's way of the sword has a lot more to do with lifestyle and Plot Themes than with simple martial capability.

The last few pages of chapter 105 lay out clearly that what Dazai and Dostoevsky do is this illusionist type manipulating and misdirection, practiced and subtle enough that no one around them really realizes they're doing it. At this point, I wonder if they even notice.

In the way that young Ranpo and his genius parents didn't notice that the rest of the world is not lying, they just don't make deductions the way Ranpo does. Dazai and Dostoevsky feel isolated from other people not just because of their abilities but perhaps in part because the redirection is almost second nature. Dazai's power generally distances him from exactly the kinds of people who might be able to understand what it's like to live as an ability user. I suspect Dostoevsky's power has something to do with causing proportional harm to people who want to hurt him, but it's possible he determines what "hurt" means, or that he's unable to control whether his ability reacts to someone wanting to hurt him versus whether they intend to act on it (ie Ango's subordinate who tried to handcuff him and ended up dead? likely dead).

I don't know why Dazai says this to Sigma, of all people. They've never met before, despite Sigma having some similarity to both of his protege's backgrounds, or maybe because if Dazai gets his hands on the Page, there's every possibility Sigma will just disappear. Or I suppose, there is something I do understand in that Sigma is considered the epitome of the "average human" even though Dazai is right and there is technically no such thing.

This is a story that tells uses the names and backgrounds of story writers. One of my favorite things to read, and which I myself have a difficult time emulating, are short stories about the lives of normal people - how they perceive the successes and failures of their small day to day actions, how they invent or experience grand cause and effect even when there is likely no such thing, how they lie to themselves and how they invent truth.

I think a lot of people who relate to Dazai, both the character and the author, can understand having a fear of people. Humans are unpredictable, and those moments of unpredictability are what make things dangerous.

If you can predict someone's actions or even entice them into going the way you expect, it can make things safer. It can also make them very very lonely. Dazai is also smart enough to see how things might go if he didn't manipulate things, leading him to wonder when is anyone being genuine with him if he can himself alter most situations. It's a self perpetuating problem that others around him can sometimes insert themselves into, but it's not easy. Dazai's level of intelligence, his sense of humor or habitual "clowning", and his depression each have served to isolate him in different ways from "normal" people.

And yet:

"I am not a superhuman beyond the limits of human wisdom."

I think he knows that members of the Agency are starting to see him for who is is, but more importantly, Dazai himself is finally acknowledging that despite the layer upon layer of facade, despite the fact that he may not be understood at every single moment, he's not completely unknowable.

In the context of his ability, his recently killing Chuuya (maybe for real and maybe for good but we hope not, we hope that the water tank is maybe part of the "tension and timing") and a lot of other people, this undeniably dark part of him that we've never seen before, Dazai is somehow more transparent than at any other time. He's a human who likes playing games, who is resentful of this nearly month long imprisonment, whose bandages stop before his elbow, who is angry with other people and what they represent to him, and who is trying to show someone who has only seen how people can use him that maybe there's some way to protect himself, some way to become individual and break out of the meaningless tale Fyodor has tried to write them into, that no person's way of being human can ever be average.

Then again, everything is one hand or the other, so who knows what lies behind this confession yet.

[vancilocs]

1-10 for lowri and mara and wellerpolycule?

chewing on the bars of my enclosure

Who initiates hugs?

Both do if they've spent any time apart, otherwise it's usually Lowri seeking warmth and leaning into Mara bc he's taller

Neferata or Altair

Who wants to hold the hug longer?

They'd grow into each other if they could

Altair, pls hug her forever

Who borrows the other one’s phone charger?

Whatever the other owns belongs to the other too

If they had those things, Altair would always take one with him and forget it on the ship or some port so they have to get a new one

Who loses their keys/wallet?

Neither, but Mara might leave his at home and just trust that Lowri has hers

No one

Who’s better with money?

They both have access to whatever they could need, but Mara is the one with more frivolous requests sometimes. He grew up practically worshipped, he's more used to nice things (and wants to share them with Lowri)

Cressida and Neferata run the day-to-day, Altair just brings them the money he gets after a gig. Though whatever he has on him during his travels, he's welcome to use

Who tried to hide the relationship from their parents?

Mara didnt whisper a word about Lowri to his family, and I think he might have even gotten rid of a suspicious partner (cult-assigned) and framed someone else by putting the thought into his brain. Lowri just had a blind great-grandmother left who she told of a cute boy she had met

No one, but Neferata was fairly careful telling her family that her and Cressida might have taken a third

Who’s better in the kitchen?

Lowri isn't good, but she's better than Mara

Neferata

Who needs/gets more sleep?

Lowri has a habit of not sleeping enough, she's up early and in bed late because she takes her job very seriously and wants to know everything going on in the castle. Mara readily takes over snooping duties and is very good at convincing her to stay in bed

Altair is entitled to long sleepy days after weeks or even months at sea. Also with the baby around everyone needs more sleep (but no use begging family to help too often, there's three of you and one baby you can handle it).

Who’s more laid back and who’s more hard working?

Lowri is a hard worker, Mara takes it more easy (but takes it as seriously, he strives for Lowri's approval as much as she strives for Angharad's)

They all work pretty hard tbh, some regularly, some more sporadically

Who has more empathy?

Lowri, but Mara's mind-reading lets him also feel what others are feeling

I think they're all kind of on the same low-ish/regular line

[duxbelisarius]

The Dance of the Dragons: A Military Analysis (Pt. 13)

Before offering my conclusions about the Dance as a conflict, there is one last event I wish to address: The Hour of the Wolf. As usual, check out the Master Post for the rest of this series.

As with most events in the Dance, our timeline for the death of Aegon II and the end of the war is vague at best. We know that the 'Muddy Mess' was fought two days march from King's Landing, while Aegon II is assassinated not long after his council receives news of the defeat. The Lads most likely arrived in King's Landing 2-3 days after their victory, while Alyn Velaryon and Leowyn Corbray saw to the surrender of the Crownlands, including a 3 day siege of Dragonstone. Almost a fortnight passes between the Lads arrival in King's Landing and that of Cregan's host; the Hour of the Wolf itself lasts for more than a week, but otherwise this is all the information that we are given. The war officially ends with the marriage of Aegon III and Jaehaera some time after the Hour of the Wolf, on the 7th Day of the 7th Moon (ie July 7th) 131 AC. Since the High Septon traveled from Oldtown to officiate the wedding, we can assume based on a distance map of Westeros that the journey probably took 40 days/almost a month-and-a-half, making the end of May the latest time in which the Hour of the Wolf took place.

George gives little reason for the North's steadfast support of Rhaenyra during the Dance, while simultaneously doing all he can to delay their intervention. I've touched on this in Parts 1 and 9 but it bares repeating that without Sara Snow's involvement, the North's allegiance to Rhaenyra is founded on a betrothal between Cregan's son and a non-existent daughter of an unmarried prince and a vague friendship between Cregan and Jace. It's also worth noting that Jace's first visit in the North was not to Winterfell but to White Harbour; despite Cregan having only been in full control of the North for three years after jailing his Uncle Bennard and his sons, Jace apparently thought nothing of bypassing Stark's authority over his bannermen to conclude a marriage alliance with one of the most powerful houses in the North. Choosing neutrality or to support Aegon would have put Cregan at odds with one of his most powerful bannermen, but Jace's de facto strong-arming of Winterfell isn't even acknowledged by the narrative.

Cregan leads an army of 12000 Northerners troops south when Aegon II returns to power, but how this host was raised and made it to King's Landing presents further problems with George's narrative. Gyldan claims that the snows were already "deep beyond the Neck" when Cregan's host arrived, and yet they appear to have marched from the North all the way to King's Landing. Like the Winter Wolves before them, Cregan's host consisted of men who left their homes to spare their families additional mouths to feed in winter, "old men, younger sons, the unwed, the childless, the homeless, and the hopeless." Marching an army 12000 strong to King's Landing in the midst of a harsh winter would require considerable resources, such as great quantities of food to keep the men and animals well fed in the harsh conditions; large quantities of firewood and tentage to keep them warm and safe from the elements, since quartering the entire force in a single settlement would put enormous pressure on local civilians; and additional horses, oxen and mules for moving these men and supplies, to replace those lost to exhaustion, exposure, illness, and potential theft and predation from animals and humans during the harsh winter.

Combined with the risk of losing men to illness, the elements and desertion, Cregan's host would have marched for one-and-a-half to two months depending on departure from Winterfell or from Barrowton and White Harbour, without accounting for the weather. This begs the question as to why Cregan did not send at least part of his army south via ship; granted the lack of any major ports on the North's western coast would have been an issue, but assuming the Mormonts of Bear Island and the fishing villages dotted along the coast could provide some ships, along with the possibility of impressing merchant ships and even buying the freedom of crews seized by Dalton Greyjoy in return for their assistance, it should have been possible for at least a portion of the army to have been moved by sea or along the coast to Seagard. From there the forks of the Trident would have allowed these troops to join the Lads and face Borros Baratheon with a much greater force.

How Cregan raised and disbanded his host generates further questions about George's worldbuilding, with implications well beyond the Dance. The decision to send the Winter Wolves was based on the need for manpower to complete the fall harvest, and the desire by Roderick Dustin and his men to spare their families additional mouths to feed in the coming winter. This appears harmless enough since the Winterwolves numbered just 2000, but serious problems arise when George extends this reasoning to Cregan's much larger host. Cregan claims that his men "died the day we marched," with Gyldan adding that "victory was secondary for these men...they marched for glory, adventure, plunder, and most of all, a worthy end." Of these men who were largely "unwanted and unneeded in the North," 1000 went with Benjicot and Alysanne Blackwood to the Riverlands after the royal wedding, while the rest swore fealty to southern lords, turned to banditry, or became sellswords in Essos.

The problems with George's choices become clear when we consider the North's population, the size of which has been estimated both by Atlas of Ice and Fire and one of George's own editors, Elio Garcia. The method they both favour takes the best estimates of each kingdom's military forces and multiplies by a hundred, assuming these forces represent 1% of the population. They arrive at a strength of 35-40000 for the North with at most a population of 4 million, though I believe 30000 and 3 million to be more accurate. F&B places Torrhen Stark's army at 30000 strong when he confronted Aegon the Conqueror; since this was near the end of the Conquest, and with no weather issues to speak of in the North, it can be assumed that Torrhen brought the largest army he could muster. Our numbers from the War of the Five Kings further support this (per the Wiki of Ice and Fire), with Robb Stark leading 20000 Northerners to the Riverlands; Rodrick Cassel and Ramsay Bolton leading 2000 and 600 men respectively at the Sack of Winterfell; and Stannis' 5000 strong northern army containing only 1500 southrons; a total of 26100, just shy of 30000.

Assuming that the Northern military is 30000 strong, this means that between the 12000 that left with Cregan and did not return, the 2000 Winter Wolves that were killed, and an unknown number of Manderly killed during the Riots in King's Landing, the North lost 50% of it's army during the Dance. This puts the Dance on par with Robb's defeat in the War of the Five Kings, which saw only 4000 of his original 20000 men return home, made all the worse by the fact that Wildlings raided south of the wall in 133 and 134 AC, requiring Cregan Stark's intervention to defeat. While it might be argued that many in Cregan's host would not have served in the Northern army in time of war, such as the 'hopeless' and 'homeless,' this simply makes it all the more ridiculous that Cregan brought untrained, inexperienced men with him on what was intended to be a campaign against Storm's End, Oldtown and Casterly Rock. Fighting the Wildlings is not comparable to warfare against conventional Westerosi armies, so unless Cregan's levies were drawn from the North's regular pool of military manpower, many of his troops would have had limited training and no combat experience whatsoever. As Cregan's host traveled from the North to King's Landing on foot, it's also doubtful that they suffered no losses to illness, the elements, desertion and hostile encounters, meaning the North's manpower deficit from the war may well be higher than 14-15000. The implications of such population loss warrant an essay all their own, but suffice it to say that losing 0.5% of one's population and the equivalent of 50% or more of one's military manpower in less than 2 years is a high price to pay.

This leaves us with the Hour of the Wolf itself, which saw Cregan Stark seize control of King's Landing in an attempt to continue the war, before the Valemen and the Three Widows (Johanna Lannister, Elenda Baratheon and Samantha Hightower [né Tarly]) forced him to back down. Ravens were sent out soon after Aegon II was killed and Aegon III was declared the new king, offering terms to the remaining Green loyalists. The better part of a fortnight (ie almost two weeks) passed before Cregan arrived, but it's only much later that the "Three Widows" send ravens accepting these terms. The uncertainty as to whether the war will continue allows Cregan to seize power, but the situation itself strains credulity. Per our calculations in Part 3, a raven could travel 100 miles in a day with human assistance, while the distance from King's Landing to Storm's End is just over 375 miles; flying there and back would have been 6-8 days, well within the better part of a fortnight. Elenda Baratheon was newly widowed and her husband's army was defeated; with the potential for the Dornish to take advantage of the chaos, she would have needed little time to send her reply to the capital. Her raven should have arrived just after if not before Cregan's host, and would have immediately undermined his plans and strengthened Corlys and Larys' positions, as Storm's End was Cregan's first target in his campaign against the remaining Greens.

The way in which Cregan interacts with the small council is likewise contrived, and seems designed by George to enable Cregan's actions rather than to facilitate interactions that are consistent with how these characters were previously written. Given that Corlys and Larys were openly involved in Aegon II's death, one would expect them to be cautious in how they dealt with Cregan Stark and his 12000 Northerners; on the contrary, the Northern host is allowed to enter the city before the council even meets with Cregan, giving Cregan a numbers advantage over the Lads, the Gold Cloaks, Larys' 'gutter knights' and the few Velaryon troops with Corlys. Had they simply invited Cregan to treat with them alongside a smaller retinue, it would have been impossible for Stark to turn the tables and have the small council arrested. One could argue that it was meant as a sign of good faith, but this makes no sense given Corlys' status as a turncloak twice over and an elder statesman besides, and Larys' status as Master of Whispers alongside his reputation as a cunning and duplicitous schemer. Even more egregious is how open they are about their involvement in Aegon II's death, labelling themselves as regicides to a man who openly despises and distrusts them, although Larys' tries to deny his role during his trial.

Cregan successfully brow beats the Lads into accepting his authority and supporting his planned campaign against Storm's End. Gyldan attributes this to Kermit and Oscar Tully and Benjicot Blackwood being youths, "yet Stark was a man..." a nonsensical proposition when he states shortly before that Cregan was 23 and thus only a few years older. Kermit and Oscar led the Riverlords forces to victory at the 'Muddy Mess,' despite losing their father on the march which could have been disastrous given the fractious nature of Riverlands politics. Benjicot was a veteran of the Lakeshore, the Butcher's Ball, Second Tumbleton and the 'Muddy Mess,' as well as numerous skirmishes in the Riverlands. While Gyldan claims that 'Bloody Ben' had a "shy, self-effacing manner," the only evidence indicating this prior to George telling us outright is his weeping at the terrible carnage of the Butcher's Ball. Much like with Daeron at Tumbleton, George suddenly dumps characterization upon us in order to justify taking the plot in a preferred direction, in this case one where three previously tenacious fighters are cowed into compliance by a man they've never met and who spent the entire Dance far away from the fighting.

Cregan's interactions with the small council itself are outright nonsensical, as he justifies his plan to raze Storm's End, Oldtown and Casterly Rock by claiming that the council is making the same error as Rhaenyra and Aegon II by presuming the war to be over. Prior to the Riots driving her from the city, Rhaenyra sent Daemon and Nettles to subdue and the Two Betrayers to Tumbleton to fight Daeron, while Borros Baratheon was still to the south. Aegon II had Borros Baratheon enforce his rule over the Crownlands, and when Cregan and the Lads took up arms against him he sent the Stormlords to fight them while sending envoys to the Free Cities to hire sellswords. Neither monarch believed the war was over, in fact Cregan even uses the threat of Aegon's sellswords attacking the city to further excuse his plan to continue the war, but no one on the council points out the complete lack of support for his claims. The Westerlands' army was destroyed at the Lakeshore and Johanna Lannister is occupied with Dalton Greyjoy, while the Stormlands and Reacher armies are defeated and in disarray; yet Corlys and Maester Orwyle only appeal to the potential casualties and the fact that the lords of those three kingdoms are dead.

The writing deteriorates further when Cregan asks the Lads, "Has Casterly Rock returned the Crown's gold,"; his suggestion that Casterly Rock held all the gold was incorrect, but it begs the question as to how he came by this information. Since only the Green Council was aware of the locations of the other 3/4s of the royal treasury (Casterly Rock, Oldtown and the Iron Bank of Braavos), there's only two explanations and neither of them are good. The first is that George 'kinda forgot' about the treasury; the second is that on top of allowing Cregan Stark to occupy the city with his army and presenting themselves as regicides, Corlys and Larys also told him the whereabouts of the treasury. If it wasn't clear already, Cregan's actions in the Hour of the Wolf depend mightily on every member of the small council, Corlys and Larys in particular, being utterly stupid and completely passive. The Hour of the Wolf becomes less onerous when Lady Jeyne Arryn and the Vale army arrives to counter balance Cregan, and the Three Widows agree to Corlys' terms soon after. Nonetheless, the fact that a self-righteous warmonger like Cregan Stark was allowed to get as far he was by the narrative is yet another blemish on a very mediocre story.

This concludes my analysis of the Dance of the Dragons as told in Fire and Blood. In the interest of this series being more than just a catalogue of plot holes and inconsistencies, I intend to write a conclusion collecting my thoughts on the conflict as a whole. In the meantime, thank you to all those who've been following from the start, and to my mutuals for your support and feedback; Cheers!

ADDENDUM

Casterly Rock is the first to respond to Corlys and Larys' terms, despite Storm's End being nearer to King's Landing. Johanna Lannister agrees to give obeisance to Aegon III and provide hostages, and to return the Rock's portion of the royal treasury, provided that the crown pardons Tyland Lannister and commands Dalton Greyjoy to cease his raids and occupation of Kayce and Fair Isle. Both F&B and TWOIAF acknowledge that Dalton joined the war on Rhaenyra's side as an excuse to raid the Westerlands rather than out of respect for her claim, so it is doubtful that he would have accepted such a command in the absence of any dragons to threaten him with. It is significant then that neither Corlys and Larys nor Cregan Stark considered going to war with the Red Kraken as a means of uniting the Greens and Blacks behind Aegon III. Since Cregan was spoiling for a fight, it would have made sense to offer his army's support against the Ironborn in return for accepting Aegon III as king and returning the rest of the treasury. The armies of Cregan, the Vale, the Lads, the Velaryons and whatever troops the Hightowers and Redwynes could contribute would be more than a match for the Ironborn, while the Hightower, Redwyne and Velaryon fleets alongside the Braavosi sellsails hired by the Vale would outmatch Greyjoy's fleet. Cregan could also have made the Crown's amnesty and support against Greyjoy dependent on supplying food to the North during the coming winter. Instead, Dalton Greyjoy remains at large until his murder in 133 AC, while the war between the Westerlands and Iron Isles only concludes the following year.

[lord-overlips]

Do you know what I would love to do to you someday? I would adore, making you beg to be touched, to be ravished. I would make you plead, on your knees, kissing my pedes like the dog you are. Finally, when you can't think of anything more to offer me but your pathetic "pleases", I will place my heel against the back of your throat and push you to kiss the floor.

And you'll stay there for me. Because we both know you want it. Want it so bad now that you're shaking and dripping behind your panel so badly it's rolling down your thighs and forming a puddle. I'll push you down, make you present yourself. And then I'll use the restraints. Lock you down like that so everyone can see how much of a slut you are for me.

And then I think I'll take my time, watching you as I abuse that cute pierced node of yours. I'll make it good, tugging on the piercing and making you drench yourself while I explore your ports to my leisure. I'm in no hurry and I want you to overload again and again.

I want you screaming. Crying. Still begging me to touch you more. Use you more. Cumming just from my hands over and over until it starts to hurt. I'll push you into the redline and then drag you back so I can do it again.

And when you're no more than a weeping, drenched mess upon my floor. Then I'll finally release you, roll you over with my heel, and take your spike for myself. And I'll ride you and use you like the toy you are, milking you dry until you can't possibly overload again and then show you otherwise.

And when I'm finally satisfied, maybe I'll give you that special kind of kiss you like so much. What do you think, my precious pet?

Overlord is at first curious, then... incredibly turned on. He tries to speak, words dying in his intake as he crumbles to the ground and feels his spark swell and array ache with sudden immense charge.

He wants ALL of it. So badly that he can't stand it. A part of him wants to argue that he's not so pathetic but- of frag, he really is. He'd beg for every slagging thing, greedy, eager. Please...

Weren't they mocking him for that just now? He didn't care.

"Please...."

It was too perfect. He'd beg for every second of it and happily thank the mech who ground his face into the dirt, abused him, ruined him. Was this really his sun and stars? This was... was so much more than he would ask for, more than he hoped to be blessed with. It felt like them, familiar but... with a vicious edge he was not accustomed to. Ohhhh he loved it!

Overlord had no hope of keeping his panels shut, panting breathlessly as he knelt, mimicking those words and hoisting his aft up, faceplates pressed down against the floor and gasping at the cool air against his valve as he let that panel slide back. He shut his optics and imagined, shivering, groaning in spark deep pleasure without a single touch to his frame and listening intently to that voice.

It wasn't enough though, the mech following those lurid words, taking his thumb and forefinger and twisting that node piercing, howling in pleasure-pain and forcing his servo to obey until he couldn't take it, coolant tears in his optics and node screaming in agony. He was forced to stop, unable to take any more, reaching back to spread his valve lips in an imagined show of abject submission. He imagined Redstrike watching, optics shuttered as as servo wriggled back to stroke over that abused node, Overlord sobbing and letting his struts give out in time with that voice.

He rolled over, panting breathlessly, one servo on his spike and the other burying itself in his valve, first two then three digits buried in that slick heat as Overlord sobbed through a painful overload, too fast, too intense, the bot tensing and gasping, vents sputtering, Overlord collapsing against the cool floor with a dazed and vacant look on his faceplates.

"Y-yes...." He vented, not even close to finished, frame just charged up and eager now. "Pl-please... please I want it." He gripped his spike again, aching node teased as well, blissful pain and heat making it hard to think.