#but now i might shed a few tears in the process

[tedoculus]

When you watch a movie in 2016 about a complicated emotionally abusive father and you related so strongly to the son who hated him so much he didn't want to go to his funeral and then you rewatch it again in 2023 and you lost all memory of who or how you related to the movie on the first watching and this time you're relating to the grief, loneliness, and financial destitution of the father and you simultaneously forgive your own father and dead step father

[tyunniez]

converse high... bttm male reader

!!.. this has to be my worst work yet,, uhh rough sex, creampie, kinda vanilla ngl, not proofread idfk also bts ref borahae 💜

you jumped around in excitement to see one of your favorite group is finally going on tour! and they're coming to your city!

you immediately rushed to check the tickets, choosing the vip standing seat. " wait, how much money do I have left? " you stopped yourself before making a bad decision.

you looked at your bank account and almost passed out. you're broke as hell.

" why the hell am I so broke? " you questioned yourself, trying to find a genuine reason.

you scanned throughout your room till your eyes landed on your closet. " ah. that's why. "

multiple articles of clothing brimmed your closet causing it to overfill, making you slightly grimace at how your clothing rail was holding on for its dear life.

you recently went on another shopping haul after seeing your favorite idol adorning a new collection that was released by your favorite fashion brand.

you just had to get it.

yeah, maybe you had a bit of a spending problem..

your parents have spoiled you since birth because you're their one and only child. no, you weren't wealthy. you had to take on jobs multiple times, but hey hard work pays off!

you were currently on your break, and you intended to spend it going shopping till you went broke but unfortunately, due to you blowing your money to buy another vip standing ticket, that money mysteriously vanished.

" hmm.. is there any job I can do right now? " you rolled around in bed while scrolling through your phone, trying to find any quick gag you could do to earn some cash.

you ended up throwing your phone to the wall, groaning aloud when you could find none.

" i'm so lazy! not to mention my piles of assignments... " you sighed to yourself, opting to go downstairs instead to eat your sorrows away.

you were greeted by both of your parents downstairs, your mom already getting started on making lunch. " oh dear, what's wrong? you look stressed. "

you go to stand beside her, washing your hands in the process to help her cook. " I'm looking for a job to buy a ticket for a concert. my fav group is coming here you know! " you complained to your mom.

you grab the onion and began slicing it, shedding a few tears meanwhile. your mom thinks to herself, turning to you with an idea.

" you know our neighbor is actually looking for someone to babysit her kid. the pay is quite good since her kid is quite.. naughty. " you stared at the soup you were stirring and hummed.

" i can send you the details if you're interested, dear. " you nodded and decided to see how much would the pay be, who knows it might be enough.

a bonus is the kid has a total hottie as her brother!

you took one look at the pay and were sold immediately. you did the math and doing this for the amount of time needed will be more than enough.

i mean, babysitting can't be that hard, right?

⊹₊⋆

you sighed nervously as you finally approached the front door, your tote bag on your shoulder with everything you needed inside. you knocked on the door, anxiously waiting for the mom to greet you.

instead, you were greeted by someone else. " you the new babysitter? "

you stuttered, brain short-circuiting. instead of answering, you stared at the man in front of you.

the red-haired cocked his head to the side, waiting for you to answer with a raised brow. " hello? you there? " he asked in an annoyed tone.

" oh, oh yeah sorry. y-yeah, i'm the new babysitter. " you gripped the strap of your tote bag, trying your best to maintain eye contact with the man in front of you.

he hummed and opened the door wider for you to come in. you excused yourself and stepped into the house.

you walked up to ms. moore to greet her but before you could say anything she rushed towards you, her bag already in her hand.

" oh yn dear! i was just about to leave! thank god you're here. so there's money on the counter in case maya wants anything to eat. you can ask my son for any help. i'll be back before one so i hope you can withstand.. "

before you could ask any questions, she already rushed her way out towards the door. " jason, you better help the babysitter this time! thank you again and i'll see you when i get back, dear! "

with a slam of the door, she was gone.

you stood there, trying to process the information she just dumped on you. in your shocked state, jason gave you a pat on the shoulder. " she always does that. good luck dealing with that devil. ", was all he said before leaving you alone.

" maya, go easy on him! " he shouted upstairs.

you turned to the kid staring at you from the couch, a little concerned about what he just said. you've dealt with kids before, this will be easy.

⊹₊⋆

god, you regretted even thinking that.

there was a reason why babysitters kept dropping out like flies. this kid might as well come straight from hell!

you let out a long sigh as you crashed onto the sofa. you finally managed to put maya to sleep. though you couldn't really relax, still scared she might pull something with you thinking she was asleep.

" don't worry she's asleep. " you looked to the side to see jason slipping next to you on the couch, remote in his hand as he scrolled through various movies.

you let out another sigh, leaning your head back against the headrest and closing your eyes. you crossed your legs over one another, inspecting your slightly dirty converse high.

you peered over next to you, silently admiring jason.

you observed how his grown-out wolf cut, his red-haired that was now washed out is slightly messy, making it look like he just rolled out of bed.

your eyes were especially glued to his piercings. from his industrial to his snake bite, god he has so much.

you were more so drawn to his lips, that you could see his tongue-piercing. he purposely toyed with it, flicking his tongue out to tease you.

he licked his lips ever so slowly, his pink tongue grazing over his lower lip, not forgetting to graze over his snake bite. you gulped and looked away to try to get your mind on something else.

you didn't want to pop a boner in someone else's house!

" had enough already? " his sultry voice suddenly asked. you whipped your neck to look at him, eyes wide like a deer caught in a headlight, did he catch me staring..?

you cleared your throat and grabbed a nearby pillow to try to cover your growing hard-on.

" w-what're you talking about? " you glued your eyes towards the tv, trying to seem as unbothered as you can, thou the stuttering clearly gave it away..

jason rolled his eyes and discarded the pillow you were clinging onto, " oh come on, don't play dumb now. "

he pinned you down on the couch, caging you in leaving you no choice but to look at him.

" don't tell me you didn't notice at all.. "

you tried your best to look at him in the eyes, trying to figure out what he was talking about. well, he was really touchy.. his hands always found their way to touch you no matter.

he always knows just where and when to linger his touches to make you slightly flustered, the way he held your waist earlier still not leaving your eyes.

he also never took his eyes off of you ever since you stepped into his house. his eyes always trailing over to wherever you are, observing whatever the hell you are doing.

your cheeks got redder as you turned your head to the side, trying to hide from his gaze. " see i know you were a smart boy, now how far are you willing to go, bunny? "

you clasped your hand over your mouth, eyes rolling back to the back of your head. this is all too lewd!

you peeked down to look at him and the view below you was breathtaking.

jason's messy hair was now slicked back with his sweat, his big hands holding your legs open as his tongue worked its way on your dick. you could feel his tongue piercing along it, the added sensation making your thigh quiver.

you slowly released your hold on your own mouth, breath shaky. " jason, i-i'm close.. " your meal voice was shaky from the amount of pleasure you were experiencing.

he hummed and just continued to suck you, his hand now fondling your balls, massaging them as if to coax you to release.

you gripped the bedsheet below you, the warmth of his mouth mixed with the occasional cold feeling of his piercing was driving you over the edge. with a loud moan, you finally released in his mouth, eyes closing in bliss.

jason swallowed it all, making sure not to leave any drop behind. you didn't know whether to feel grossed out by it or not.

" ready to move on now bunny? " jason asked you while grabbing a bottle of lube, squirting a glob of it on his fingers. you silently nodded and watched as he squirted another glob on your hole.

" cold.. " you whined at him, feeling the chilliness of the lube. " don't worry, i'll warm you right up bunny. " he smiled.

he first inserted one finger into you slowly, letting you get used to the feeling. he began slowly moving it, occasionally grazing over that spot that made you see stars.

he then inserted another and another, steadily picking up his pace and getting more rougher as time went on. your eyes shoot back open as you kept your lips as tight as you could.

you were close and jason seemed to know this too.

before you could reach your climax, he swiftly pulled his fingers out. you looked up at him in confusion, dumbfounded as to why he stopped. " w-why'd you stopped? "

he took off his boxer, tossing it somewhere else. " don't tell me you were gonna cum just from that. the real fun begins now, bunny "

you watched as jason stroked his own dick, pouring lube on it. he was big. maybe too big for you. " are you sure it'll fit.. " you asked him while your eyes still trained on it.

" don't worry.. " he aligned himself with your hole, " i'll make it fit. "

with that, he shoved himself into you, the student action made you let out a loud moan. your eyes instantly teared up from the sudden stretch. you bit your lips to make sure no other noise escaped from you.

he was so big and you felt so.. full. his tip perfectly kissed your prostate, almost as if you were molded just for him.

" look at you taking it so well.. i knew i should've stuffed you full the moment i saw you. "

you stifled another incoming moan. your hands both covered your face, trying to hide your flushed face. two hands suddenly held onto your wrist, effectively prying your hands off of your face.

" don't hide this gorgeous face from me now. "

his own fingers intertwined with your own as he pounded into you roughly, going fast and aggressive from the start. a string of moans left your lips, your voice shaky due to how fast he was.

soon, one of his hands sneaked its way onto your thigh, hoisting it up. you almost screamed from how much deeper he was inside you. you didn't think it was even possible.

" jasonn, i'm near.. " you whined. your own dick bounced and twitched begging for release. " i'm close too, bunny.. cum with me, yeah? "

you nodded while jason held onto your ankles, his fingers digging into the fabric of your converse high. he somehow began speeding up, chasing his own climax.

you closed your mouth with your own hand, knowing damn well your moans were echoing throughout the house already.

with no warning whatsoever, you felt the warm liquid soon filling your inside, dropplings of it escaping from your hole. the feeling of being filled with jason's thick cock mixed with his own cum running down your ass caused you to also release.

you shut your eyes as your release painted your stomach white, some of it landing on jason's.

after a few moments of silence, he then let go of your ankles, slowly pulling out. you winced at the feeling of emptiness. you rolled to the side, jason also crawling next to you.

you soon almost lull yourself to sleep before remembering that tomorrow you have to babysit maya. oh god maya. you prayed she was sleeping like a baby and didn't hear anything.

" shit.. i honestly can't feel my legs and i still have to babysit maya tomorrow... " you groaned out loud next to him, trying to brainstorm an idea on how to babysit that devil in your current state.

jason only laughed next to you. talking about how he'll figure out a way to deal with her tomorrow. you hope he will since you can't miss the pay...

[lighteyed]

you and i (back at it again) / steve harrington

summary: steve's left standing alone after starcourt, until you show up for him.

word count: 2.2k

author's note: inspired by this tik tok because i nearly shed a tear also this is my first time posting in awhile be nice pls

He watches his friends reunite with their families, mournful. He stands alone and contemplative by a cop car, the various spots of bruising and swelling on his face beginning to pulse with pain the more his adrenaline began to fade out of his bloodstream. The cops at the station said they'd called his parents house, his house, but no one had picked up. He knew they were home. He kicks a rock near his his foot, shoving his hands in the pockets of the bloody uniform he was still wearing. He wants a shower. He wants to go to bed. He wants to go to bed with the serenity of someone who knew they were loved. He wouldn't be able to do that if he went home. The word home a loose term.

"We can take you home if you need a ride, son," one of the cops says to him. Steve kicks at another rock. Home.

"That's alright," Steve says dismissively, ignoring the tight twist in his chest. "Someone will have gotten in touch with my parents by now. I'm sure they're on their way." The cop looks doubtful. Steve hates that he looks doubtful. Steve hates that he's also doubtful. "Couple more minutes," he swears. He knows he might as well walk his ass home, though.

He leans against the hood of the car, rubbing at his jaw. His hand comes away bloody. He's about to accept the cop's offer for a ride, maybe, he figures, he'll just go to Robin's and sit there for as long as her parents will have him, when a car comes careening into the lot like there's not fifty officers of the law standing around, the tires screeching loudly across the gravel. It's barely at a stop, practically still moving, when you throw the door open and throw your body out of it.

"Steve Harrington, what the fuck?" You leave your car door open, leave it in the middle of the road, still running, to get to him in time. He gazes at you, and it's a stupid look in all honesty, mouth agape, his brown eyes big and tragic looking, his face torn up and swollen. He wasn't expecting you. Why would he have been? You'd been broken up for a few months now and he was still nursing his wounds from it, knowing it was supposed to be for the best; you felt like he was hiding things from you and he knew that he was, hiding all the stuff about the Upside Down, not wanting you involved, wanting you safe. And in a way he was glad for it. He'd gotten through this with you unscathed, and who knows what would have happened if you guys had still been together. When he looks at you, though, when he allows himself to be pulled in closer, your hand coming up to graze his cheek, examining every scrape on his face with softness and worry, he allows himself to want. To miss you.

You tilt his face back, scrutinizing his features. He keeps his eyes on you. You showed up for him. No one else but you. You were here. "The fire is all over the fucking news and I didn't know if you were working tonight so I was sitting by the phone waiting to hear from someone and then your friend Robin called and said you were waiting here for someone to come get you so I just came in case and- and what happened to your face? And where are your parents?"

He shakes himself out of his stupor. "They didn't answer the phone." But you did. You answered and you were here. A wave of pure love rushes through him. He knew a thing or two about being alone, had felt that way for as long as he could remember, no matter how many people he surrounded himself with or how many parties he threw, but you were here, and he wasn't alone. Steve wraps his arms around you in one sudden movement, an outpouring of affection he hadn't realized he'd been reserving for you. Always you.

You stand there for a moment, processing, before you respond, leaning into his touch. The sirens wail around you. Neither of you move. He's safe. You breathe relief into the embrace, holding him tighter to you. He's hardly talking, and usually he's the one talking the absolute most, but he's stunned, both with what's just happened, what he's borne witness to, and with the way you care about him despite everything, more than anyone he's ever met, and the way he cares about you and how could he ever, ever let himself let you go? How could that ever happen? It's all he thinks about as he holds you, feeling safer than he's felt in awhile, the smell of your hair and your skin filling his brain with serotonin.

"Am I taking you home?" You pull away, staring up at him, his ruined face that is still so painfully gorgeous, still so hard to look at. Your hand is remains poised on his cheek. It's warm and welcome.

"No, no, your house, please," he brings his hand up to meet yours.

"I got you, c'mon, honey." He turns and thanks the officers who'd been waiting with him before letting you lead him to your car. He keeps his hand on yours. It tethers him to reality. He's here and he's okay. Or he will be, soon. He's here and he's safe, at the very least. He's not trapped and being tortured. No one's going to hurt him. He's got your soft hand in his and he's okay for right now.

The drive to your house is silent, but it's not awkward. You try to keep your eyes on the road as much as you can but you can't help that they keep finding themselves back on Steve. You've never seen him so reserved. You're sure it was more than a fire that happened back there, and you're sure he won't tell you a thing about it. You drive one-handed the whole way home. You let him need you.

At your house, you get your bathroom set up for him to shower, placing fresh towels on the rack for him, laying out your products on the counter. He would've been able to find them regardless, but you busy yourself with it anyway. When you go into your bedroom to tell him the bathroom is ready, his shoes are off and put into the corner he used to always put them in, and he looks exhausted. "I didn't bring clothes to change," is the first thing he says.

"That's what you're most concerned about?" You give him a funny look. You open your closet and rummage around on the ground for a second before tossing him a pair of his old sweatpants and a t-shirt. He stares at them in his hands. "I didn't know if I should give them back. So I just... didn't." He smiles a little. The first you've seen all night.

"Thanks," he waves them in the air before retreating down the hall. The door shuts and the shower squeaks on.

The way you loved Steve was unconditional, as much as you wish it wasn't sometimes. Even when he was pushing you away, even when he kept things from you, you'd always be there for him. He didn't have anyone in his corner like that. And you wanted to be. It wasn't something you felt obligated to do. You cared about him, and so you went to him. He'd do the same if the roles were reversed. It was unconditional because even when being there for him hurt, you still stayed. You still loved.

When he comes back into your room, his hair dripping but clean, God, he feels clean, his face devoid of dried blood but bruised and wounded, you're waiting for him with a first aid kit and a fresh ice pack. You must've heard the water shut off and gotten everything ready for him. The old sweatpants and t-shirt smell more like you now than they do like him but he's not complaining in the slightest. Something about you keeping them instead of throwing them away or lighting them on fire makes him think maybe there's hope. Not that you had a bad break up to begin with, it was more sad than angry, nothing that warranted a clothes burning, but still. Still, still, still.

He sits down where you indicate, rubbing his towel across his head to soak up the sopping water. His face is flushed from the hot water. You sidle up next to him with the medicine and bandages and try not to get too caught up in him. He places the ice pack on his puffy, blackened eye. He doesn't get it, this gentleness. He doesn't think he deserves it, really. After everything, does he deserve it? Does he get this peace?

"You're fidgeting," you mutter, narrowly missing the spot you were aiming for.

"Oh, sorry," he lifts his chin up a bit more and tries to sit still. You're so patient and kind and it makes him ache a little. You take care of him and it's not for any reason other than you caring about him. He's not used to anyone caring about him. "Are you sure this is alright? You don't wanna... be alone?"

"No, I wanna make sure you're okay," you answer easily, as easy as breathing, swiping medicine across his wounds with the lightest touch you can manage. He hisses in pain, and you wince, feeling it, too.

"Are you sure? You don't have to."

"I want to, Steve, I promise." You pat his cheek, another gentle, affectionate maneuver from you. If he's okay, you're okay. He takes this in. He thinks he really feels his heart expanding.

As you start dabbing at his other wounds, you speak, finally. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course you can," he replies, blinking up at you with his good eye.

"Was this..." you hesitate. He probably won't answer. "I don't doubt there was a fire but this..." you gesture to his face. "This looks a hell of a lot worse than just escaping a fire, Steve, you look seriously fucked up."

"What, you don't think I look pretty anymore?" He smiles again and you roll your eyes at him, but you smile back all the same.

"You're very pretty, Steve, but you have a black eye and there was blood all over your face and you're all cut up." He swoons just a little when you call him pretty. He's got an ego, what can he say? He continues smiling at you, a little high off painkillers, a little high off being here with you. If he's gotta be tortured he may as well get you back out of it.

"You look pretty, too, y'know," he says softly, his free hand twisting a strand of your hair around.

"Dodging the question I see," you raise your eyebrows at him but say nothing else. It was to be expected.

He takes a deep breath, looking up toward the ceiling, thinking maybe all this time he's just been stupid and silly for not telling you sooner, maybe he could've been with you all this time if he'd just told you, maybe it wouldn't have been the end of the world to have you involved. Maybe it would all be fine. "I wanted to keep you safe from all of it. See what happened to me? It could've been you, if you had been there."

"I would've wanted to be there with you," you insist. "You know I would."

"I do," he nods. "And that's why I don't involve you, babe, if something happens to me it doesn't matter to anyone but if something happens to you-"

"Why would you say that to me? You think I wouldn't care if you died?" You take his face in your hands, and he drops his ice pack. "Steve, are you an idiot? It would matter to those kids you spend all your time with if you died. It would matter to Robin, and to your family even if they take you for granted, and it would matter to me. I love you so much you moron, you can't say it wouldn't matter. I wouldn't be here if it didn't matter. I go out of my mind worrying about you, don't tell me you don't matter."

His head spins, in the best possible way. The pain from his wounds doesn't register. Your hands on his face registers. You words register. Everything else is background noise. "You still love me?"

Oh. Your face warms. It's not like it had been that long since you'd called it off, it should've have been a surprise to him, but hearing you say those words makes him light up. You see him light up. "Yeah, of course I do, it doesn't go away just 'cause you won't tell me anything about your life," you grumble, taking your hands off him.

"Hey," he whispers, grabbing for you before you can tear yourself away from him. He brushes the hair back from your face. He has that look in his eyes that make people fall to their knees. Heavy-lidded and tender. Soft. Loving. "I love you, okay? I do. That's why I try to protect you. I'll tell you anything you want." He knows it now, for real, that he can't lose you again. Not this time. "C'mere, come back." You let him pull you in. "I'll tell you anything, please don't leave me, okay?" You shake your head at him. Never, never. He's pleading, desperate. When he moves to kiss you, the desperation is laced in it, he's lurching forward and he's hungry and yearning and your lips meet soft and fast because he wants to savor it after so long.

The disconnect of your lips sends him reeling, he wants to dive back in for more, for more of everything, but you stop him. "It's me and you, okay, always. But you gotta let me all the way in this time." You tap his heart lightly. "All the way, Steve. Everything."

He leans back. He is hesitant and bruised and bloody, a little bit broken, but mostly he's in love. Mostly he wants to give you the world. So he takes your hands in his. He tethers himself to reality. And he talks.

[alyrasturnz]

can you make a sad matt blurb about reader having a miscarriage?

 ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎SHATTERED DREAMS

❐ summary » the bond between a mother and her child is a force of nature, unyielding and profound. yet, the anguish that engulfs a mother upon losing her child is an abyss of sorrow, a pain that defies the very essence of strength. it's a heart-wrenching paradox, where the depth of love amplifies the depth of grief, creating an emotional chasm that words can scarcely encompass.

❐ pairings » husband!matt x fem!reader

❐ warnings » miscarriage, angst, mentions of the hospital

❐ a/n && w/c » lowkey shed a few tears writing this • 3.53k

as the evening sun dips below the horizon, it stretches its golden fingers through the windows, casting elongated shadows that dance across your living room. you find yourself perched on the edge of the couch, a cup of tea nestled in your grasp, its warmth fading with each passing moment. an almost palpable sense of unease lingers in the air, weaving itself into the very fabric of the room, a whisper of discomfort that you can't quite decipher.

the discomfort in your gut swiftly morphed into a searing pain, causing you to wince involuntarily. it felt as though an invisible hand had twisted your insides, each movement sending sharp, relentless stabs through your abdomen.

you decide to head to the bathroom, hoping that the solitude and the cool splash of water might clear your mind. perhaps, you think, it could wash away the layers of anxiety that have been steadily accumulating throughout the day, like dust settling on a forgotten shelf.

as you step inside and close the door behind you, your eyes are drawn to a small, ominous stain of blood on your underwear. your heart seems to halt in its rhythm, a cold grip of fear tightening around your chest. the sight sends a shiver down your spine, the implications swirling in your mind like a dark storm.

the sight of the blood sends a wave of panic crashing through you, your mind spiraling with a thousand terrible possibilities. you struggle to maintain a facade of calm, whispering reassurances to yourself that it might be nothing, yet a deep, gnawing certainty tells you that something is profoundly wrong.

you hastily clean yourself up, your hands trembling as you fumble for your phone. with shaking fingers, you dial your doctor's number, your mind a whirlwind of disjointed thoughts, barely able to focus on the task at hand.

each second stretches into an eternity, the uncertainty gnawing at your very core, making it difficult to draw a steady breath. when the doctor's voice finally breaks through the silence, you can scarcely find the words, your voice quivering with an almost palpable dread.

“i found blood on my... underwear,” you manage to say, your voice barely above a whisper. the silence on the other end of the line is deafening, and you can almost feel the doctor weighing her words carefully. she asks you a few questions, her tone gentle yet serious, and you answer as best as you can, your mind still reeling from the shock.

after what feels like an eternity, the doctor speaks again, her voice laced with a somber gravity. “i'm sorry, but based on what you've described, it sounds like you might be experiencing a miscarriage. i need you to come in as soon as possible.” the weight of their words hangs heavy in the air, each syllable sinking into your heart like a stone, the reality of the situation slowly unraveling before you.

the words hit you like a tidal wave, the world around you blurring as you struggle to process what you've just heard. you sink to the floor, the phone slipping from your grasp, tears cascading down your face in relentless streams. 

the dreams you cherished, the plans you meticulously crafted, all dissolve into a painful void as you grapple with the overwhelming grief that now envelops you. every heartbeat echoes with the ache of shattered hopes, and the room, once filled with the warmth of your aspirations, now feels cold and indifferent. 

as the reality of the doctor's words settles in, you find yourself adrift in a sea of sorrow, each wave pulling you deeper into the abyss of despair.

you immediately grabbed your purse and dashed out of the house, your heart pounding in your chest. with trembling hands, you fumbled with your keys before finally getting into your car. the engine roared to life, and you sped down the streets, your mind racing as fast as the vehicle, every second feeling like an eternity as you rushed to the hospital.

you felt a sense of fear gnaw at your very being, a relentless anxiety that seemed to consume you from the inside out. your mind was a whirlwind of dark possibilities, each one more terrifying than the last. you couldn't bear the thought of something happening to your baby, the mere idea sending shivers down your spine and tightening the grip of dread around your heart.

when you arrived, you didn't hesitate for a moment. you immediately sprang out of your car, the door slamming shut behind you with a resounding echo that reverberated through the parking garage. the urgency of the situation propelled you forward, your footsteps quick and determined as you dashed towards the hospital entrance, the weight of your fears heavy on your shoulders.

your heart pounded with an almost unbearable intensity, each beat a stark reminder of the fear coursing through your veins. the sterile smell of the hospital, mingling with the cold, clinical atmosphere, only served to heighten your anxiety. every antiseptic scent and every stark, white surface seemed to amplify the dread that gripped your soul, making the air feel heavy and suffocating.

you sat alone in the waiting room, the incessant ticking of the clock mirroring the frantic rhythm of your racing heart. the walls seemed to close in on you, their oppressive presence amplifying the suffocating silence that was almost deafening. every second stretched into an eternity, the stillness of the room magnifying the turmoil within your soul.

the doctor had finally called you in, breaking the agonizing wait. you immediately rose from your seat, your movements swift and purposeful, as you walked into the office. each step felt heavy with anticipation, the gravity of the moment weighing on your every stride.

you sit down in front of the doctor, her eyes brimming with a mixture of concern and understanding that seemed to pierce through the tension in the room. "can you tell me about the symptoms you've been experiencing?" she asks, her voice gentle and soothing, as if trying to ease the weight of your worries with her empathetic tone.

you take a deep breath, gathering your thoughts before you begin to explain. "i've been experiencing some bleeding and cramping," you say, your voice trembling slightly. "it started a few days ago and hasn't stopped." each word feels heavy, laden with the anxiety and uncertainty that has been gnawing at you.

the doctor nods, her expression one of focused attentiveness. "how heavy has the bleeding been?" she inquires, her tone measured and deliberate. "and are the cramps constant, or do they come and go?” her questions are precise, each one delicately probing the depths of your discomfort.

"the bleeding is more than just spotting, but not as heavy as a period," you reply, your voice tinged with unease. "the cramps come and go, but they're quite painful." each word you utter feels like a small release of the tension that's been building inside you, as you lay bare the nuances of your symptoms.

"i understand," the doctor says softly, her voice a gentle balm to your frayed nerves. "have you noticed any tissue passing?" she inquires, her eyes searching yours for any sign that might provide further insight into your condition.

you think for a moment, gathering your thoughts before responding. "yes, i did notice some tissue," you say, your voice barely above a whisper. "it was small and grayish." the memory of it sends a shiver down your spine, the image lingering in your mind like a shadow.

the doctor takes a moment, her eyes reflecting a mix of empathy and professionalism. "i'm sorry you're going through this," she says softly. "we'll need to conduct a pelvic exam to determine if your cervix is opening or if there's any remaining tissue. is that okay with you?" her words are gentle, yet carry the weight of necessity, each one carefully chosen to convey both concern and the importance of the next steps.

you nod, a tumultuous blend of anxiety and relief coursing through you. "yes, that's okay," you murmur, your voice tinged with apprehension yet underlined by a quiet resolve.

“alright then,” the doctor says, their voice steady and reassuring, a calm anchor in the storm of your emotions. "we'll also perform an ultrasound to check for the baby's heartbeat and development. in addition, we'll take some blood tests to measure your hCG levels. this comprehensive approach will help us understand what's happening and guide us in providing the best care for you."

you nod once more, feeling a wave of appreciation for their calm and compassionate approach. "okay, let's do it," you say, your voice steadying as you draw strength from their reassurance.

the doctor smiles gently, their eyes reflecting a warm reassurance. "we'll take good care of you," they say, their voice imbued with a comforting steadiness. "let's get started."

»--•--«

after the tests are done, the doctor returns to your side, her expression thoughtful yet kind. "we've completed the pelvic exam, ultrasound, and blood tests," she begins, her voice carrying a gentle gravity. "i know this has been a lot to go through, and i truly appreciate your patience throughout this process."

you nod, feeling a complex mix of exhaustion and anxiety swirling within you. "what did you find out?" you ask, your voice tinged with a quiet urgency.

the doctor takes a deep breath before speaking, her eyes reflecting a profound empathy. "the ultrasound revealed that there is no heartbeat, and your cervix is beginning to open," she says, her voice gentle yet steady. "the blood tests confirm that your hCG levels are dropping. i'm deeply sorry to inform you, but it appears you are experiencing a miscarriage."

the words hit you with the force of a tidal wave, and an overwhelming wave of sadness washes over you. the doctor places a comforting hand on your shoulder, her touch a small anchor in the storm. "i know this is incredibly difficult to hear," she says softly. "we'll discuss the next steps and ensure you have all the support you need during this challenging time."

you nod, your voice barely above a whisper, trembling with a mix of uncertainty and sorrow. "what do i need to do now?" you ask, the words escaping your lips like fragile whispers in the wind.

the doctor explains gently, her voice a soothing balm to your raw emotions. "we have a few options," she begins. "sometimes the body will naturally pass the tissue on its own, but we can also use medication to help expedite the process. in certain cases, a minor surgical procedure called a dilation and curettage (D&C) might be necessary. we'll take the time to discuss which option feels right for you and ensure you are fully supported throughout."

you take a deep breath, struggling to process the torrent of information and emotions swirling within you. "i'll need some time to think about it," you say, your voice tinged with both hesitation and resolve.

"of course," the doctor replies softly, her voice a gentle whisper of reassurance. "take all the time you need. we're here for you, and we'll support you through every step of this process, ensuring you're never alone in this journey."

you nod, feeling a small measure of comfort in her words, like a warm blanket on a cold night. "thank you," you murmur, your voice carrying a blend of gratitude and vulnerability.

as you sit there, the room feels heavy with unspoken emotions, each breath laden with the weight of the moment. the doctor's eyes meet yours, her gaze steady and compassionate. "it's important to take care of yourself during this time. lean on your loved ones for support, and don't hesitate to reach out to us if you have any questions or need anything."

you nod once more, feeling a tear slip down your cheek, tracing a path of sorrow. "i will," you whisper, your voice trembling. "i just... i never thought this would happen."

the doctor squeezes your shoulder gently, her touch a comforting anchor in the storm. "it's a heartbreaking experience, and it's okay to grieve," she says, her voice a soothing balm. "everyone's journey through this is different, and there's no right or wrong way to feel."

you take a deep breath, feeling the weight of her words settle within you. "thank you for understanding," you say, your voice barely above a whisper, laden with gratitude and sorrow.

the doctor stands, her presence a quiet reassurance. "i'll give you some privacy now," she says softly, allowing you a moment to gather your thoughts. "when you're ready, we can discuss the next steps in more detail."

you watch as she leaves the room, her footsteps a fading echo. a mix of sorrow and relief washes over you, intertwining like the strands of an intricate tapestry. the path ahead seems shrouded in uncertainty, yet a glimmer of solace resides in the knowledge that you are not facing it alone.

»--•--«

you stood in the kitchen, stirring the pasta in a rhythmic, almost mechanical motion. tears streamed down your face, each one a silent testament to the grief that clung to your heart. the memory of your miscarriage loomed large, an unshakable shadow that clouded every thought and movement.

you both had envisioned a different reality, one filled with laughter, tiny footsteps, and the joy of nurturing a new life. instead, you were left grappling with the heart-wrenching void, questioning the fairness of a world that could give so much hope only to take it away. it wasn’t fair, and the weight of that unfairness pressed heavily upon your spirits, leaving you to navigate the murky waters of grief and loss together.

the scales of justice seemed to have been tipped against you. it was an unfathomable cruelty that your baby, so full of potential and promise, was taken in such a manner. the dreams and aspirations you had for that precious life, the myriad of possibilities that could have unfolded, were unjustly extinguished before they even had a chance to bloom.

“i’m home!” matt announced, his voice echoing through the hallway as he gently closed the door behind him. he casually tossed his bag onto the couch, the weight of the day visibly lifting from his shoulders, and made his way towards you with a warm, familiar smile.

"hi baby," he whispered, a tender smile playing on his lips as his arms snaked around your waist. his hand found its way to your stomach, caressing it gently, a gesture meant to comfort but only serving to deepen the ache in your heart.

he buried his face into the crook of your neck, planting soft, lingering kisses. “how are my two babies doing?” he chuckled softly, his voice a tender blend of affection and humor. the words, meant to be endearing, caused your emotional defenses to crumble, the weight of his love and your own heartache intertwining painfully.

you put the spoon down, a pathetic sob escaping your lips, shattering the silence. matt immediately halted his actions, his eyes snapping up to meet yours, concern etched deeply into his features.

“hey, hey,” he murmurs, gently turning you to face him, his hands coming up to cup your face with tender care. “what’s wrong, hm?” he asks softly, his thumb tracing the contours of your features, his eyes searching yours for the source of your distress.

you shook your head, leaning deeper into his touch, the tears still streaming down your face like a relentless river. his warmth was a fragile solace, yet it couldn't stem the flow of your sorrow.

“matt,” you whispered, your voice breaking as you struggled to steady yourself. “i... i lost the baby.” the words tumbled out, each one heavy with the weight of your grief, your voice a fragile echo of the heartbreak that consumed you.

his eyes widened, the color draining from his face. “what? no, no, that can't be,” he stammered, his hands trembling as they held your face. “when? how?” his voice was a mixture of disbelief and desperation, searching your eyes for answers that seemed too cruel to be true.

you couldn't hold back the sobs any longer, collapsing into his chest. “it happened this morning. i tried to call you, but you were in the meeting. i didn’t want to leave a message like that.” your voice was barely a whisper, each word laced with the agony of the morning's events, your tears soaking into his shirt as you clung to him for support.

matt's arms tightened around you, his own tears falling silently. “oh, god, y/n, i’m so sorry. i should have been here. i should have...” his voice cracked under the weight of his guilt, each word a testament to the anguish he felt for not being by your side when you needed him most. his tears mingled with yours, a silent promise of shared sorrow and unspoken regret.

you shook your head, clutching his shirt. “there was nothing you could have done. it just happened.” your voice, though filled with sorrow, sought to absolve him of the guilt he carried, knowing deep down that fate had spun its cruel thread beyond anyone's control.

he pulled you closer, his voice a choked whisper. “we’ll get through this together, i promise. i love you so much.” his words, though strained, carried the weight of his unwavering commitment, each syllable a desperate plea to hold onto the love that bound you both in this storm of sorrow.

the two of you stood there, wrapped in each other's arms, sharing the weight of a loss that words could never fully capture. the silence between you was profound, a testament to the shared grief that transcended verbal expression, each heartbeat a silent acknowledgment of the deep, unspoken bond forged in the crucible of your shared pain.

as the minutes passed, the silence between you grew heavy, each breath a reminder of the emptiness that now filled your hearts. matt's fingers gently traced patterns on your back, trying to soothe the unsoothable. 

“i keep thinking about the nursery,” he finally whispered, his voice thick with emotion. “we were so close to finishing it.” the unspoken dreams and hopes that room represented now hung in the air like a specter, and his words were laced with a poignant mix of love and sorrow, each syllable a painful reminder of what could have been.

you nodded, your tears soaking into his shirt. “i know. i was just looking at the crib yesterday, imagining...” your voice trailed off, choked by the weight of unspoken dreams and the cruel reality that had shattered them. each tear that fell was a silent testament to the myriad of hopes and visions that now lay in fragments, scattered like fragile pieces of a once-bright future.

your voice broke again, and matt held you tighter, his own tears mingling with yours. “we’ll find a way to honor them,” he said softly. “somehow, we’ll keep their memory alive.” his words, though whispered, carried the weight of a solemn vow, each tear a testament to the profound love and grief that bound you both.

time seemed to stretch and compress all at once. you could hear the distant hum of the city outside, life continuing as if nothing had changed. but for you, everything had. matt's hand found yours, squeezing it gently. "remember the first time we found out?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.  "we were so scared, and yet so happy." his words, laden with a bittersweet nostalgia, transported you back to that moment of fragile joy and tentative hope.

you managed a small, sad smile. "i remember. we stayed up all night talking about names and dreams." your voice, though tinged with sorrow, carried the echoes of those long, hopeful conversations. 

each name and dream you had whispered into the night now seemed like distant stars, their light dimmed but not extinguished. the memory of those hours, filled with laughter and anticipation, stood in stark contrast to the present, a poignant reminder of the fragile beauty of hope.

matt's eyes glistened with unshed tears. "those dreams aren't gone, y/n. they're just... different now. we'll dream new dreams, together." his voice trembled with a mix of lingering sorrow and resilient hope, each word a delicate thread weaving a new tapestry of possibilities. 

you leaned your head against his shoulder, feeling the warmth of his presence. "i don't know how to move forward from this, matt. it hurts so much." your voice, barely above a whisper, carried the weight of your anguish, each word trembling with raw emotion. 

the warmth of his presence was a fragile anchor in the storm of your sorrow, a small solace amidst the overwhelming pain. as you nestled closer, the unspoken understanding between you deepened, a silent acknowledgment of the shared burden and the uncertain path ahead.

he kissed the top of your head, his voice tender and resolute. "we'll take it one day at a time. some days will be harder than others, but we'll face them together. we have to believe that there's still light ahead, even if it's hard to see right now." 

taglist — @imwetforyourmom @meatballzerz69 @pinkishpearls @bandanamatt @thedangerousalleyway @muchloveforhacker @stinkytinkywinky @jetaimevous @everleiqh @conspiracy-ash @ifwdominicfike @blahbel668 @slutforsturniolos

[misguidedasgardian]

Wildcats (Part XXIX)

XXIX. The Aftermath

MASTERLIST

Summary: You deal with some of the aftermath of what happened to you.  

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader

Warnings:  Zombie apocalypse AU, living dead, zombies, guts, blood, guns, cursing, talks about imprisonment, talks about burning with iron, and possible rape, injures, talks about a beating, might miss some important warnings, but you know what this is about

+18, MINORS DNI

Notes: Alright… I want to admit… I ran out of most “scenes” I had planned/already written, but I think I built an important base for what’s to come. 

Daryl didn’t release you until you were inside the house, and you were able to place your trembling feet on the wooden floor.

You saw it in their faces, nobody knew what to do with you, with this broken, injured you.

You haven’t even recuperated from your injuries of DC, and now you had more, and they were piling up

“You should go to the infirmary”, said Rick softly

“I think I want to take a bath first”, you said softly, they shared looks

“I’ll tell Denise to come to you, alright? in an hour, a special house call”, you smiled at him and nodded.

Rick called your name softly, and you catched yourself looking at nowhere, your eyesight unfocused on the wall

“What did he do to you?”, he asked, but he seemed to regret it as soon as he saw your face, “do you want to discuss it in private?”, he asked you both

“He didn’t… rape me”, you said slowly, and you heard Daryl take a deep breath, “he locked me up, fed me dogfood sandwiches, I had a knife on me so I tried to use it, so they came in like three guys and they beat me up a little”, you said, “and they burned me…”, you saw Rick whine, he rubbed his face with his hands, to then look at you with shiny eyes, he saw you trying to hide your forearm, and he grabbed it gently, taking the bandage softly, when they the brand on your skin, watching the burn mark, the initials, Rick took a deep breath, taking a few steps back and rubbing his face and hair back, pacing.

You watched Daryl as he looked at the initials in your skin, he shook his head, his eyes filled with tears. You could tell he had a hard time processing it, he didn’t want to believe it 

“I didn’t tell them, anything”, you said

“You should have”, Rick said desperately, grabbing onto your shoulders gently, “you should have spoken if that’s what kept you safe”

“They branded me because I refused to join them”, you said softly, “I refused to kneel and become a soldier or that guy’s wife”, you assured them, “they are like a cult, they run in complete and total loyalty to this guy Negan, he is like some sort of god”

“I’m gonna need you to tell me more”, said Rick, that’s when Daryl surrounded you with his arm

“Later man”, he demanded, Rick nodded

“Yeah, I’m sorry”, he said, he squeezed your shoulder softly and nodded.

Daryl led you downstairs, slowly, gently. 

He made you sit in the toilet while he drew you a bath, just like you had done for him that time. You hugged yourself, still in Abraham’s jacket 

He didn’t leave you, you didn’t think twice about it, he helped you take out your jacket, and shirt, he winced when he saw all the bruises, and he caressed gently each and every one of them.

You guessed he dared to do it because you hadn't rejected his touch, right now the only thing you wanted was his gentle hands on you, rather than everyone else’s

You took out your bottoms and then he helped you get in the tub, you moaned when you felt the hot water, just how you liked it, and it instantly soothes your aching body as you sit in it.

You watched as Daryl shed a couple of tears, as he saw the state you were in

“Please don’t”, you whispered, he shook his head, and finally looked at his face. “they just beat me up a little”, you muttered, “after they locked me up and i tried to stab them”, you whispered. You touched his face, “get in here with me”

“Nah, let me take care of ya”, he whispered, he grabbed a sponge, and he started to rub you gently, he cleaned your bullet wound that still had a couple of stitches, and then the rest of you.

One cold shower in seven days, the water ended up dark when you were done. He helped you get dried and dressed in your pajamas, is the only thing he had handy. 

When you resurfaced on the main floor, Denise was waiting for you with a shy smile and sad eyes.

You let her check you, every bruise, even the one in your head that was already healing

There was a particularly nasty bruise in your ribs, oh you remembered that particular kick

Tell us where your camp is bitch

“I want to rule out a concussion or internal bleeding”, she said, putting a little flashlight into your eyes, “have you vomited?”, you shook your head, “shortness of breath?”, you shook your head, “have you lost consciousness? Dizziness? abdominal pain? chest pain?”, this girl was reciting straight from a book, and Rick, Michonne and Daryl could see how uncomfortable you were becoming, you had indeed experienced most of those things, but because they beat you up. She checked your bruise some more, and then she sentenced that it was not an internal bleeding, just a bruise. But if I ever feel any of that myriad of symptoms I should go straight to her. 

She bandaged the burn mark, even if it wasn’t raw, you didn’t want to see it. She then took out the stitches of your almost healed bullet wound, she gave you some painkillers and demanded you stay here until at least the bruise in your ribs disappeared.

Then she left.

It was bananas to think that in the last week you had more medical checkups in the middle of the apocalypse than in your whole “normal” young adult life. You took a long breath, to distract yourself from those dumb thoughts. 

You were home now, you thought, as you looked around, you could relax, you could be safe, nobody was going to grab you, make you do things, burn you, lock you up.

You were back with your family, you were safe here.

You remembered all those times that Rick and Daryl told you to stay here, stay home, and you got angry, and now the only thing you wanted to do was to crawl into your bed and sleep for years.

“I know I have to… tell you what happened, what I know”, you offered softly, “but I just… want to sleep”, you whispered brokenly. Daryl shared looks with Rick and Michonne

“I’ll make you something to eat”, Michonne said, “you shouldn’t have those pills on empty stomach”, you barely nodded, and she served you some food, at this point, it was a little after noon, and you didn't know if they planned it, but nobody else showed up.

As you were eating rice with canned mushrooms, and sipping water, Rick couldn’t stop looking at you

“They want to see you”, he said softly, “but we told them to reign it in, that we were going to ask you”

“Who does?”, you asked back

“All of them”, he said with a soft smile, “so tonight, when you wake up from your nap”, he said gently. You’d like that, be with your family, all of them.

“Thank you”.

You ate everything up, Michonne even brought you some canned peaches, which you devoured, you took the pills with sips of water, and then Daryl guided you, you made a decision to go upstairs, even if you found Daryl’s room extremely comfortable, but, just the thought of being in a basement… just freaked you out. 

When the door closed behind you, and you were alone with him, you felt another wave of sadness/relief/rage crashing onto you like a tidal wave. 

“Hey, hey, what’s the matter?”, he asked, wiping your tears with his thumbs 

“When I was there… after a week I saw a guy… and he had your crossbow”, you sobbed and he caressed your face, “for a horrible second I thought they killed you, that you died, and I almost die right then too”, it got so bad, that you hiccuped into your sobs. 

“Nah”, he said, “ain’t nobody takin’ me out”, he said, “Not now that I have ya”, you sobbed as he hugged you tightly into his chest. “a couple found me in the woods that day, I tried to help them, they were runnin’ from the saviors, and they double crossed me, took my things”

I took it from a man that we encountered in the woods, he was alive when we left him

“I thought… “there is no way they took it from him while he was still alive”, you cried, “I thought the worst…”, he grabbed your face softly, making you look at him 

“Ain’t nobody takin’ me from you”, he repeated, “ya’ hear?, never, aint nobody takin’ you from me neither”

“Yeah”, you said then, smiling through the tears, “now I know, thanks for rescuing me”, you said with a soft smile, he only shook his head gently, with a smile on his face. You went to the bed and sneaked under the big comforter and the sheet. “Daryl…”, you called, he turned to you, “can you please… stay with me?”, you asked him

“M’never leavin ya”, he assured you, “not until ya get tired f’me and tell me to go to hell”

“That’s never going to happen Dixon so you better mean it”, you said softly. He laid by your side.

“Sleep, I’ll keep watch”, he whispered

“Promise to wake me up to relieve you?”, you asked childishly, as you always did when you slept next to him on runs

“Sure”, he said, understanding immediately.

“Wait… the good stuff Denise gave me are kicking in”, you moaned softly, “Mmmm this is goin’ to be a hell of a ride”, he chuckled as you surrendered yourself to a drug-induced sleep on Daryl’s chest.

Rick rubbed his face, tears threatening to come out, he left the house, after lunch, he needed to report to Deanna, who wanted to see you. 

“Is she alright?”, asked Carl, Rick had to almost tie him up so he couldn’t go with them to retrieve you.

“Yeah, she is good”, he said softly, “she needs some time”, he said softly, “she is with Daryl right now, but tonight we will all gather to make her feel better, alright?”, Carl nodded.

“Yeah, I got something I think she might like”, Rick smiled and placed his hand on his shoulder.

“That’s my boy”, Carl left him and Rick went up the few steps to Deanna’s house, and coming out of it, was Smith, who almost got face to face with Rick, Gary was following him closely

“Hey Rick”, he greeted

“Hey”, he said weirdly

“The boss lady was handing us a couple of jobs we have to do, being productive members of the community”, he said with a big smile

“Good, that’s… good”, he said. Rick didn’t know why, but like many other members of the group, he didn't like this guy at all.

“How is she?”, he asked, “big operation you did today”

“Yeah”, he said simply, “everything went well, ge got her back, those bastards… they… beat her up real nice, but… luckily, just that, so… she will be alright, she is with her… Daryl… right now”

“Oh good”, he said, and then he just walked away 

When he entered Deanna’s house, she jumped, she was truly nervous, and had a disturbing look in her eyes

“Is there something wrong?”, he asked, Spencer was there too, looking concerned, his arms crossed across his chest

“No, nothing to worry about”, said Spencer

“How is she, Rick?”, asked Deanna

“Everything went according to Alexander’s plan, he has proven to be, a great addition, no casualties, no nothing”, he said

“Because of her”, said Deanna, her knowing smile returning to her face, she walked towards him and grabbed his shoulders, “how is she?”, she echoed

“She broke down, as soon as she saw herself safe, she has cried, quite a lot, right now, she wants to be with Daryl, she had a bath, she is taking a long nap, Denise already checked her, give her some pain killers, she got beat up, but she managed to stay quiet about the location of Alexandria, so that’s great”

“I’m glad she is with Mr Dixon”, she said with a pleased smile, “those two, are my favorite couple”, she said with that sneaky smile, Rick chuckled

“Oh? how so?”

“Well, unpredictable, strong, a bit messy, colorful”, she said, “passionate”...”

“Alright”, chuckled Rick

Spencer was watching the scene, a bit relieved, but Rick could still see the trouble in his eyes.

“Deanna”, he called, “you know you can count on me for anything, right?”, he asked then, but he could not get nothing out of her

“Of course I do”, she said

“I saw Smith and Gary leaving”, he muttered, Deanna seemed even more troubled

“Yeah, I gave them both jobs”, she said, “anyways, I’d like to see her, when she is ready”

“She agreed to have a little get together later”, he said, “of course the both of you can go, I’m just worried, I don’t want her to do any favors, so, family only”, he said

“We will just come by to see how she is doing”, she said with a pleased smile.

Rick left the house with an uneasy feeling on his chest, he didn’t know what happened, and he didn’t like not knowing. 

Thanks to the drugs still lingering heavily in your system, you woke up slowly, calmly, the colors around in your room told you it was almost sunset, you felt groggy, but… better, in a sense, waking up and be completely aware of your surroundings was… calming

Daryl was looking at you, with a concerned look in his eyes

“Stop”, you whispered

“Wha’?”, he asked  

“Don’t look at me like that”, you whispered, he grabbed your face softly, making you look at him

“Like wha’?”

“With pity”, you answered 

“It ain’t pity’, he insisted, “I ain’t never felt more scared than the moment I thought you were gone”, he whispered, “I now I got you back, and I’m still cared”

“Why?”, you asked him. Then you realized it could be that he was afraid you had been… broken… damaged beyond repair. He didn’t say it, so you guessed you were right. “I’m here Daryl, I’m back, and I’m not going anywhere”, you said softly, “you did it, you got me back, I’m here”

“I want to kill that son’bitch”, he said, “I wanted to kill him right then and there”, as would that be the reason he was scared of losing you, that you’d be scared of him, of his “murdering” instincts

“I could have killed them, that day, but I aimed for their legs… I…. didn’t”, you whispered, “I just wanted them to fuck off, I never thought…”

“You didn't want to kill people, that don’t make you weak or nothin”, he said

“Well and you wanting to kill them doesn’t make you bad”, you said, he leaned in and kissed you, “I know I’m a bit banged up, but it’s still me, the same I was a week ago”, you said, “alright?”

“Yes Ma’am”, he said with a soft smile

“Now… it’s my party, so… you better cook me something GOOD”, you said, putting on your best front, you stood up from the bed, and put on your… clothes… your thickest jeans, a long sleeve shirt, with a turtleneck… you didn’t even know why, you didn’t want them to see you… like they had this morning.

With only a bruise in your face, you went down the stairs.

You entered the main space slowly, you were relieved of being back home, but your body still shook a bit. When you got to the living room, all the women in your group were there, Michonne, Maggie, Rosita, Tara, Beth. They all seemed surprised when they saw you, and then, they gave you that look.

Pity

“Please don’t”, you muttered, “don’t look at me like that”, you whispered 

“We thought you would like some company”, said Michonne, regaining her usual voice, the one she used when she was happy, “we will accompany you if you want to”

“Thanks”, you said smiling softly, “I do, really”, tears threatened to spill in your eyes, “thank you for rescuing me”, they all came in at once, but took turns to hug you tightly, murmuring praises in your ears and words of encouragement.

“We will eat, the pasta that you like”, said Maggie, your face lit up

“Real pasta? the dried kind? not the can kind?”, you asked

“The… “real” one”, confirmed Maggie, you smiled widely. They smiled at you when they saw your relieved face

“Oh good”, you said with a wide smile .

The rest of your family arrived, Glenn, Abraham, Rick, Carl, with Judith, and even Gabriel, Eugene and Tyrese, the original 18 were gathered, well, now 17 that you had lost Noah, who had been somewhat replaced by Alex. There was only one person who shone in its absence, but you didn't want to think about it. 

You ate all together, pasta, like you liked it.

But after dinner, you could tell Rick was getting anxious, so, Daryl, Rick, Alexander and you went to the corner to speak

“I didn't see him, Negan”, you began, “but i know enough to say that… this is big”, you said determinedly, “this is a huge operation, this people ran in complete loyalty towards him… he had this lieutenants of sorts, the one who imprison me was one, SImon”, you muttered, “then under then they have what they call their soldiers, the saviors, the hands that get dirty, with guns, heavy artillery, then, there’s workers, people they protect in exchange of their.. handy work, you have cooks, manual laborers… then, you have people who had wronged the system, they became some sort of slaves”, they heard everything you had to say about them.

“like I said, I don’t know who this Negan guy is, but… If he finds a woman attractive, he will make her marry him”, you said with a shaky voice

“Marry ‘em?”, you nodded

“And have sex with him”, you continued, “if they refuse he threatens to kill their real husband, or he melts their faces off with an Iron, or vice versa, if he needs someone to fall in line he will take his women for himself”, they both shared looks, “If a single woman won’t marry him, he makes them do hard labor instead, not many make it”.

“How did you learn all of this stuff?”, asked Rick

“It’s incredible what you hear when you keep quiet”, you said, “this guy Negan likes to make public displays of force, or law enforcement, that is one of his punishments, and I saw two guys with a melted face” 

“What did he make you do?”, Rick asked, as he was afraid of the answer

“He first off, his man Simon, offered all the bells and whistles, first to marry him, them to make me one of his soldiers, but I didn’t want to, I told him I wanted to go, so he deducted I had a camp… despite that I told him I didn't”, your voice broke at the last sentence, “I didn’t tell ‘em”, you assured, “I didn’t, but he knew, he saw me too clean and well kept, he wanted our location so when I wouldn’t give it he…”, both men stood still, “locked me up, beat me up, burned me”

“you should have told him so he would leave you alone”, Rick repeated

“I couldn’t do that Rick”, you whined, “it’s a huge operation”, you said, “they hold up in this huge factory, for what I heard, they have outposts too, trucks, guns, all of it”, you said, “they are hundreds of them”, the panic in their faces, they needed to know, “and they are not like Alexandrians or dumb fucks, they are us, Rick, times ten, more vicious, more violent, with more guns and resources, and they are not afraid to use them”, you said, “They run on ultimate loyalty towards Negan, their leader, he had turn these people into their soldiers, they are fiercely loyal, and entitled, they believe themselves to be the top of the food chain”, you said then, “the kind of guys that we wouldn’t let inside of Alexandria? well, he managed to control them”, you said. 

“You talk about this guy like he is some sort of cult leader”, he said

“Charles Manson wished he had come up with this stuff”, you said then, you looked down, “one of the members of my Atlanta group, the last one, found them before we did, he is one of them now”, you said, “I have reasons to believe, for what he told me, that they enforce themselves into other communities, makes them give them things, foods, and whatever they want… or they kill them”

“Jesus… Jesus helped us get you back, he told us, his community is under the savior’s thumb”, said Rick, you nodded

“He helped you?”, you asked, Daryl grabbed your arm softly

“Yeah, he approached me and Carol, and stayed with us until we got you back”, said Daryl, you smiled

“He took us to Hilltop”, said Rick, “it's a farming community, he told us the saviors killed a sixteen year old boy”

“Oh”, you said, it was great news that you knew another community, but horrible because of what was happening, “they’ll do the same to us”, you said, “it’s a matter of time, they will take our shit, and if we don’t fall in line, they will kill us”, you finished

“What are you saying?”, asked Rick

“He will look for us, hell, he might be looking for us right now”, you said, “and we better be prepared for when he does find us”, you said shortly

“To do what?”, asked Alexander

“To negotiate”, you said, “our loyalty and services for keeping our stuff, our houses, or something like that”, you muttered

And that… truly unsettled them.

You had today to recuperate, and cry, and feel pity about yourself, but now? you needed to pull it together, for what’s to come. You couldn’t give yourself more time to grieve whatever happened to you, they could be back at any minute, they could be watching you right now.

You jumped when the door opened and the three new guys entered, you didn’t understand what they were doing here, and Deanna and Spencer went in just behind them.

She wanted to see you and speak to you, but she understood it pretty quickly so once she made sure you were fine, she let you be, with the promise that anything you may need, you could count on her. 

Who knew that being taken by a hostile group and tortured would make your group more united? As you looked around the room you understood it.

You would do anything to keep them safe.

And soon you will be facing the greatest threat to your family yet… You had today, you will not take another day to yourself, to mourn, you needed to get your head straight, because whatever is lurking in the woods, you need to be right here, with your family, keeping them safe. 

But you still had today. 

You felt Smith’s eyes on you, when you looked back at him you didn't see a smirk, on those dark eyes with mockery in them, you actually saw concern, worry even. You tried not to think much about it

There was a person who still wasn’t here… and right now, as you felt the bandage touch against your long sleeve shirt… you needed her.

taglist 🤍 @crazyunsexycool @capricxnt

[some-little-infamy]

You Are the Difference

(Read on AO3) (Written for @911actions, prompted by @daughterofscotland : What if Buck is Tommy's first serious boyfriend?)

Buck isn’t ashamed of being bisexual. He’s not. But not being ashamed and being 100% comfortable in public are two entirely different things. He’s seen the way people look at them when he’s out with Tommy. It isn’t everyone, it isn’t even every time they go out, but it does happen. It happens enough that Buck finds himself glancing around when he’s on a date with Tommy, clocking every person around them who shows any signs of being a potential problem.

Buck’s explained that he isn’t embarrassed, that he just feels better being aware, and Tommy’s accepted that much. It doesn’t stop Buck from holding his hand while they walk down the street, or giving him a quick kiss before they leave the restaurant, or leaning into the arm Tommy has wrapped around his waist while they wait in line for popcorn at the movies.

Tommy watches him do it, but he’s stopped commenting on it the way he used to. Instead of trying to reassure Buck he simply allows Buck to go through the motions that make him feel a little more comfortable. Tommy doesn’t seem to mind… but it’s something Buck overthinks every time he does it, especially after watching the way Tommy doesn’t seem to notice or react to any of it. Tommy only seems to notice Buck noticing.

“Does it get easier?” Buck asks one day, after clocking a serious side-eye from a woman in line behind them at the coffee shop. There’s so much happening around them, music being piped in through speakers, orders being called, the hiss of the espresso machine’s steamer, the chatter of other customers… but Buck can’t help but focus on the one thing he wishes he wouldn’t.

“Does what get easier?” Tommy asks, taking a sip of his latte. They’re sitting down at a table in the corner, and Buck glances past Tommy to the bustling cafe behind him. He debates not bringing it up at all, changing the subject to something else before he’s stuck admitting to more things that are probably just piling up until Tommy decides he’s had enough of Buck.

Still, Buck’s tried to be nothing but honest in this relationship, and it’s working out so far. Why stop now?

“Putting up with people being awful just because you exist,” Buck clarifies. “I mean, you’ve been doing this a lot longer than I have. How long did it take you to get used to it?”

Tommy considers the question for longer than Buck anticipates, to the point that Buck almost does change the subject.

“I don’t know,” Tommy says finally.

“What do you mean, you don’t know?” Buck asks, brows furrowed.

“I mean,” Tommy starts, hesitating before pushing forward. “I don’t know. I haven’t really dated before. Not seriously, at least.” The admission comes slowly, like Tommy’s debating taking the words back even as he says them. He doesn’t, though, and in the face of Buck’s surprised silence Tommy continues. “I usually just go out to bars before a hookup. Maybe a coffee date or two. But I haven’t been with anyone I liked enough to see more than a few times.” Tommy flushes slightly, looking back up into Buck’s eyes when he adds, “Before you, obviously.”

The silence that falls between them has a weight to it now. This shared first is so big that Buck’s afraid he might actually shed a tear over the wave of feelings he experiences at the realization, blindsided by a truth he never would’ve guessed on his own.

Buck doesn’t know what to say. He’s stunned, unable to fully process everything that Tommy just told him. All this time, Buck’s assumed that Tommy was so much more experienced at all of this… this dating other guys stuff. Of course Tommy would have years to practice being cool and collected in the public eye, because why wouldn’t he? Tommy is… well, amazing. He’s hot, and kind, and funny, and the idea that he’s been single for the entirety of the time he’s been out just feels… wrong.

“I’m your first boyfriend?” Buck asks incredulously. His eyes are wide, unable to hide a single ounce of his surprise.

“Yeah,” Tommy confirms. “Is that a problem?”

Tommy’s tone isn’t accusing or even challenging… there’s a vulnerability there, and just the slightest hint of worry. Buck could laugh - if it didn’t feel so wildly appropriate for the moment they’re having - over the idea that Tommy thinks there’s a universe in which Buck would be scared off by something like that.

“No, no, uh, of course not,” Buck reassures him. “It’s just… I mean, you’re so many firsts for me, and I just figured…” Buck trails off with a soft, fond smile crossing his features. “I never thought I’d get to be a first for you, too.” Buck shifts in his seat, his coffee forgotten in front of him. “How has this never come up before now?” It’s been weeks now. Months. Months of Buck thinking that this is just the life Tommy’s used to living, and that he’s the only one feeling out of his element here.

“You never asked,” Tommy says simply.

“Yeah, well, I wasn’t exactly keen to go into all of, uh, this comparing myself to your exes,” Buck admits. “It felt safer not to ask.”

“Evan,” Tommy says, his tone so caring, so soft, that Buck nearly melts back into his seat from where he’d been growing more tense and alert with every word, quick to try and hop on the defensive.

“Sorry,” Buck’s quick to apologize.

“You don’t have to be sorry,” Tommy says. “But you should know that I’m not comparing you to anyone. Who you are, what we have? It’s… special. It’s different from anything I’ve had before.”

“Yeah, I know the feeling,” Buck agrees, smiling easier now. “I guess I just assumed I was just another boyfriend for you.”

“You’re not ‘just another’ anything, Evan. You’re important to me. Our relationship is important to me. I hope you know that.”

Lately Buck’s been worried whether he’s moving too fast or too slow, if he’s doing this dating thing all wrong in regards to Tommy. It turns out there is no ‘right’ way. There’s nothing Tommy’s used to that Buck might be messing up or not doing, nothing Tommy’s expecting.

Tommy chose Buck because, well, because he’s Buck, and that’s all he needs to be.

“So, you think I’m special?” Buck asks, a smirk slowly pulling up the corners of his lips.

“Oh my god,” Tommy says, a fond exasperation filling his tone. “I’m never going to hear the end of this, am I?” “I hope not,” Buck says.

He hopes that there’s nothing but time for the two of them. Closing his eyes Buck imagines a future of other firsts - going on vacations together, moving in together, proposals and marriage and maybe even a kid or two. He imagines years, decades, a lifetime, with Tommy, and it feels good. It feels right.

“I plan to bring this up forever.”

[pokemonvillainadventures]

🩼☠️🩼☠️🩼☠️🩼☠️🩼☠️🩼☠️🩼☠️🩼☠️

Team Skull x Injured Reader

Opening up isn't easy, but is suffering in silence any better?

Pokemon: Dewpider

🩼☠️🩼☠️🩼☠️🩼☠️🩼☠️🩼☠️🩼☠️🩼☠️

----------------------------------------------

*AUGHH* FUCK! *sharp inhale* ohhh . . ohhhh . .fuck . . . *sharp inhale* yep . . nope . .definitely not good . . *ack* . .

Welp, that's one sure fire way to twist your ankle and possibly break your ass in the process. What the fuck ended up happening? Well maybe, just maybe training in the pouring Po Town rain, not a smart idea. Training in the Rain on some slippery ass block of concrete also not good. Having your own Pokemon be a water type that knows Bubble Beam and, has yet to perfect it causing stray suds to fly everywhere, ccombined with the previous and you've got a recipe that'll lead you broken ass first to the Pokemon center.

Oh your Dewpider, your sweet precious Dewpider. As much as you loved having them as a partner they weren't exactly the most graceful little bug around. Ironic for the water type to easily go sliding at the slightest limb touching a puddle. Her bubble beam although powerful tends to go everywhichway except for the target infront of it. Which is why you were out here today. Which is why you're also hugging your left ankle praying to Arceus that you didn't break anything. Feeling around the wounded area despite rain chilling you to your core, your ankle was on fire and already starting to swell.

How this baby bug managed to shed tears under that ball of water was beyond you. Though, with a heavy sigh and small pat on her head you couldn't get mad at her. The only thing that worried you was how you were going to keep this hidden from the team. The last thing you needed was for them to go on making fun of you for doing something so stupid. With the best of your ability you managed to rise from your seat with your now muddy shorts. Pain shot through you like a jolt from a pikachu as you bit on your cheek to muffle your cries. Painfully, slowly and painfully, you hobbled back to the steps of the shady house, praying that no one would notice your wobbly walking pattern.

The Grunts:

• Okay listen. . .

•None of them actually knew that you were injured into you sarcastically pointed it out and then they all collectively went "ohhhhhhh okay"

•I mean . . . the KINDA knew that somethin' was a little bit off . . . but only kinda.

•Since the Grunts live by a no judgment principle, for the most part, they tend to not want to point out anything in case it might hurt someones feelings.

•Like yeah . . . in theory that seems nice but that means everyone just silently observes your clearly struggling form and just hope that this is a choice and not an accident.

•Yeah, sure you didn't want to get anyone else involved with your carelessness but come onnnnn seriously?!?

•You loved them, but in this moment if you had to keep going around doing all your normal tasks on a swollen ankle you were going to kill someone!

•Well luckily after you pointed it out to them everyone was quick to drop what they were doing to try and help you out.

•Albeit, a few of them did still poke fun of you for getting injured to some bubbles but hey at least they were trying.

•Emphasis on the TRYING. . . yeah unless you got 10₽ and you were a Pokemon they could heal you just fine. So makeshift remedies were going to be your saving grace until your ankle magically healed itself or, you were forced to be rushed to the nearest Pokecenter and hope they didn't need to cut it off.

•Well with as many grunts that fill these halls someone was bound to come up with something to make you feel better.

•And so the grunts would each take turns trying makeshift remedies and watching random Poketube videos that might help your ankle. Each idea leading nowhere and causing you to form an additional headache!

•Your body mangled on the living room floor as grunts tried elevating your foot with different objects, such as but not limited to, pillows, comic books, an old bucket, a pile of loose tiles, and someones grimer who felt more inclined to eat the sock right off your foot than actually trying to hold it up.

•In the kitchen grunts were working away grabbing random foods and concocting remedies that "worked so well for them when they got sick". Though failing to realize that you weren't sick just injured and no matter what they shove in your mouth, if it isn't pain killer, your ankle is staying twisted.

•Still though, as you lay on the floor watching as your fellow teammates aee actually going out their way to try an make you feel better, was indeed making you feel better.

• ". . . thanks guys."

Guzma:

•Well Guzma wasn't the happiest person to receive this news.

•He wasn't angry! Just a teeny tiny bit a little frustrated . . .to say the least.

•"So . . . What the fuck happened?"

•Hahaha oh boy.

•After explaining to him your not so graceful training session with Dewpider, the boss was really trying his best to keep up the "grumpy upset look" while holding back stiffled laughter.

•However that doesn't stop him from pulling the "ya stupid!?" Comment on you while he lifts your body and carries it off to one of the many beds that litter this house.

•You could feel a rush of embarrassment cross your face as some of the grunts giggled to themselves at the scene playing out before them.

•Being carried like a child in the bosses arms no less was not something you wished for others to see.

•Grumbling to yourself you let put a small "This is so stupid!"

•But Guzma was quick to clap back, big smirk and all.

•"Play stupid games and win stupid prizes sweetcheeks."

•Opening the door and flopping you down on the bed, despite his tough guy exterior he was genuinely concerned about you. Why else did Guzma choose the room with a bed closest to his?

•"Now I ain't a doctor or somethin' but stay here and don't move a whole lot. Here *he hands over a few pillows* try elevating it to get the red down. *He stands up to start leaving* Ya got that?! Now I don't want to see you move? Got it!?"

•You nod back.

•"Got it?!?"

•You sigh. "Yes."

•Before he leaves for good he turns back to tell you "Hey . . . if you need anything, just holler. . I'll try to help as best as I can. ."

•He finally leaves you, a blushing mess, on the bed.

Plumeria:

•Surprisingly, a lot more vocal about her frustration in this situation.

•"Arceus Fuck! . . Gahhh . uhh . . Damn, when did this happen?! What happened?! Why did this happen!?"

•Behind that wall of frustration was the hint of genuine concern, even if her showing it was through means of bombarding questions.

•Trying your best to explain the whole situation Plumeria was doing her best to shoo off the grunts so that you had room to breath.

•"Oh so you felt like acting stupid by yourself no less, on one of the rainiest days?"

•"Um . . yeeesss??"

•"Where was your phone you could have at least phoned me up so I could have idk, helped you?!"

•"Sorry?"

•"Ughhh . . let me guess you didn't even have your phone on you?! Where is your phone, give me your phone!"

•Snatching the phone out of your hand, she puts her number into your contacts and staring it as a favorite.

•"Cool. . . now when you feel the need to act stupid again, call me and I'll smack you."

•Sitting in your spot like a deerling caught in the headlights, your body is hoisted off the ground as she helps you to stand. She tries her best to drag you along, to her room of all places.

•"I don't want you climbing up those stairs and twisting something else. Just don't touch anything got it?!"

•Shoving the door open, her room was actually very inviting. Her bed laced with stuffed PokePlushes. A small vanity was seen across from it. A desk lay next to the bed, and next to that was a small bookshelf. Honestly it was the only non-neat thing in that room. Her makeup was everywhere, and the little trinkets that call the self home were spaced out sparatickly.

•"Sit! And don't move. . . and don't touch anything either!"

•Sitting on her bed you made damn sure not to move an inch. Plumeria eventually came back into the room holding a glass of water and some medicine.

•Shoving it in your face she barked out "Drink!"

•Again you obeyed.

•"Now lay down!"

•Feeling the softness of her bed engulf you, it almost made the pain in your ankle disappear, you hadn't even noticed Plumeria was laying down next to you.

•She moved her laptop off her desk and between the two of you.

•"The meds might take a bit for them to kick in." And off she went to pull up a movie, "The Angry Pidgeys" and that was that.

•Not another word was spoken between the two of you, but she didn't need to say anything. The way she put the extra blanket around you instead of her, how she used one of her plushes as an elevation for your foot. How she brought out the good snacks from her stash. She just wanted you to feel comfortable, all in her own Big Sis way.

🪲🎧🖤☠️🪲🎧🖤☠️🪲🎧🖤☠️🪲🎧🖤☠️

[meimiou]

The Glow of Memories

synopsis: Since childhood, Ran and his best friend y/n have cherished a secluded hideout in the forest, a sanctuary where they confide their deepest worries and share their dreams. This special place has been a refuge for their secrets, joys, and fears, strengthening their bond as they grew up together. Till one day, y/n’s heartfelt words about the future and their dreams took on new meaning, shaping Ran’s journey and leaving a lasting impact on his life.

ᝰ pairing: Ran Takahashi x f!reader ᝰ genre: angst, øne-shøt ᝰ warnings: none ᝰ word count: 1.6k

Mei’s Echo! Hey, this is my first time writing a story, and I have to admit I’m a bit nervous about how people will receive it since I’m completely new to this scene. Despite my nerves, I decided to take the plunge and publish this one-shot. I should mention that English is not my first language, so I might not be able to express myself as clearly as I’d like. There may be some mistakes, so please bear with me. Additionally, I decided to write fanfictions because I saw people on Twitter/X asking for more stories about RJ Nippon. I hope you enjoy reading it and that you like my first story ^^

It was a gloomy afternoon, besides dark clouds and heavy rain, the lightning seemed to be the only light of the day. Ran needed a few seconds, even minutes to process the message he received from his mother.

“You’re joking! Say you’re joking! I’m begging you!” Ran cries out in desperation to his mother. But even she couldn't hide her grief as crystal-shaped tears slide down her cheeks.

“I’m sorry…”

The only thing left to come out of his mother’s mouth. It was a mix between words and air, one could say the last air she had left before her knees gave out and she and her son were crying on the floor in despair.

Her husband, also in a state of shock and still processing, tried everything to comfort these two people who meant the most to him, but it was in vain.

It was just this one message, a short, bitter message that would change their entire lives. The news that y/n had died of an abdominal aortic aneurysm and would now live with the angels and protect all the people she knew, even if it was now in a faraway place, heaven.

Ran had never been the same since that day. He lost himself when he heard the news at just 16. In the years since, he had grown into a mature and tall young man.

On his 18th birthday, for the first time since y/n passed away, Ran returned to their secret hideout, a place that had always been a sanctuary for him and y/n. It was where they shared their secrets, shed tears of joy and sadness, exchanged hugs, and talked about their fears for the future. For them, it was always a second home, as they called it. But now, only he called it his second home.

Ran never had the courage to go there alone. He was afraid of reliving the past and facing a future without y/n.

“Nothing has changed about this path…” Ran whispered to himself. But it was a lie. The path hadn’t changed in any shape or form, but the person who once walked beside him was missing, and Ran knew it too well. He was alone now, without her voice, her tears, her rants, and her smile that never failed to make him smile too.

“Ran, look at this!” y/n exclaimed, pointing to a spot near a shimmering lake. The lake was nestled deep within the forest, far removed from the noise and bustle of the city — a perfect place to unwind and relax.

The dense canopy of trees above filtered the sunlight, casting dappled shadows on the forest floor. Birds chirped melodiously, and a gentle breeze rustled the leaves, creating a serene atmosphere. The air was crisp and fresh, carrying the earthy scent of pine and moss.

Ran glanced at y/n, a small sparkle in his eyes, captivated by her enthusiasm. Her face was lit up with excitement, her eyes wide with wonder as she gazed at the tranquil scene. Before he could respond, y/n took his hand, her grip firm and warm, and pulled him eagerly toward the lake.

He felt an exhilarating thrill as they dashed through the underbrush, the world around them becoming a blur of green. Their laughter echoed through the trees, mingling with the sound of leaves crunching beneath their feet. The lake seemed to draw them in, its surface glistening like a sheet of glass under the sun.

As they reached the water’s edge, they paused, panting lightly from the run. The lake was stunning, its calm waters reflecting the sky and surrounding trees. The place had an enchanting quality, as if time itself had slowed down just for them. Ran couldn’t help but feel a deep sense of peace and joy as he stood there with y/n, their shared excitement making the moment even more magical.

As they stood by the lake, y/n gazed at the still water, her expression shifting from excitement to a more reflective mood. The surface of the lake was like a perfect mirror, reflecting the sky and the lush trees surrounding them. She took a deep breath, her eyes softening with a touch of melancholy.

“Every time I see my reflection in the lake,” y/n began, her voice barely above a whisper, “I get kind of sentimental. It feels like time is slipping away from us as we get older.”

Ran watched her intently, sensing the shift in her mood. He felt a pang of sadness in his chest, knowing exactly what she meant. The moments they shared in their secret hideout were precious, but they also reminded them of how fleeting time could be. The innocence of their youth was slowly giving way to the uncertainties of the future.

y/n’s gaze remained fixed on the water, her reflection mingling with the gentle ripples that distorted her image. “It’s like each year passes by faster than the last, and sometimes I worry about what the future holds for us.” she continued, her voice tinged with a hint of fear and vulnerability.

Ran squeezed her hand gently, offering silent support. He understood the weight of her words, feeling the same uncertainty about the future. He often wondered where life would take them and whether y/n would be by his side through the twists and turns of adulthood. The lake, once a place of joyful memories, now also held a bittersweet reminder of the passage of time.

“It’s hard not to think about what lies ahead” Ran admitted, his voice thoughtful. “I worry about what’s going to happen to us, where we’ll end up, and if we’ll still be friends in a few years.”

y/n nodded, her eyes reflecting the same concerns. The future felt like an endless sea of possibilities, both exciting and daunting. Yet standing here with Ran, she found solace in the strength of their bond.

“We’ve always been there for each other” she said softly, “and I hope that never changes. I want to see you become the volleyball star you’ve always dreamed of being. I know you can do it, Ran.”

Ran felt a warmth spread through his chest at her words. Volleyball had always been his passion and knowing that y/n believed in his dream filled him with determination and hope. Her unwavering support made him feel like anything was possible.

He smiled, feeling a renewed sense of purpose. “Thanks, y/n. I’ll work hard for that, and I’ll be cheering you on too, whatever path you choose.”

Together, they stood at the edge of the lake, surrounded by the tranquil beauty of the forest, and silently promised to face whatever the future held hand in hand, supporting each other’s dreams every step of the way.

“Wow, look at the stars, Ran” y/n giggled, pointing up at the night sky. “They twinkle just like your eyes do when you see a volleyball.”

Ran glanced at the stars, then back at y/n, who was lying beside him on the soft grass. He was struck by how her eyes sparkled in the moonlight, mirroring the constellations above. He didn’t respond verbally but simply lay down next to her, allowing the peacefulness of the night to envelop them both.

As they stared up at the dark blue sky, Ran noticed something different. The usual calm of their shared moments was tinged with a fluttering sensation in his stomach, like a delicate butterfly taking flight. He couldn’t quite place it, but it felt oddly significant as he observed y/n’s face bathed in starlight.

y/n suddenly sat up, her gaze fixed intently on Ran. “You’ll be 16 soon, Ran. You should really enjoy this time while you can. You’re still young after all.” she said, her voice carrying a bittersweet undertone that Ran couldn’t quite decipher.

Ran looked at her, puzzled by the depth of her words. “You sound like my grandma...” he replied with a light chuckle, trying to shift the mood. Despite his attempt at humor, the fluttering butterflies in his stomach remained, leaving him with an unshakable sense of nostalgia.

y/n smiled softly, then lay back down, her hand brushing lightly against Ran’s. They shared a comfortable silence, the sound of crickets filling the air as they continued to gaze at the stars.

Two years later, Ran stood on the court, his heart pounding with excitement and nerves. The game was intense, and the moment he had been dreaming of was finally within reach. As he leapt for a crucial spike, the memory of y/n’s encouraging words echoed in his mind.

“I know you can do it, Ran” she had said, her eyes shining with belief.

As he scored the winning point and celebrated with his team, Ran looked up towards the sky. He felt a deep sense of gratitude, knowing that y/n’s words had been more than just encouragement — they had been a beacon of hope that had carried him through his challenges. Yet, even amidst the triumph, he couldn’t forget the deep wound left by y/n’s passing. Her absence was a void that he was still learning to navigate.

Ran felt the weight of that loss, a lingering ache in his heart. But he also felt her presence in the supportive words she had spoken, and in the promise she had made. He knew that y/n was always with him, guiding him, just as she had hoped. Her belief in him continued to inspire him, even as he worked to heal and move forward.

With a smile of contentment and a heart still healing, Ran knew that every success he achieved was a tribute to y/n’s unwavering faith in him. Her words and memories were a source of strength, a reminder that he was never truly alone.

[flmer]

★ mr. loverman.┊ wc: 1,3K? not sure.

content: angst, talks of abandonment, abandonment issues?, panic attack.

pairings: riddle rosehearts, azul ashengrotto x gn!reader.

note! They saw you leaving them behind and all they could do is just helplessly try to stop you from leaving them but it was all just a dream or is it? (this has been rotting on my notes app for more than 4 months now) lowercase intended and this is a series for all the house wardens/dorm leader but I decided to post these two first since it IS getting long :'))

riddle rosehearts.

It was currently midnight and riddle was so confused as to why he was still walking around in the school's corridors since it was against the rules to be outside your dorm after curfew and he always makes sure to never break any rule yet why is he here? he's sure that even if something happens he'll only go out past curfew if necessary but as he was walking while deep in his thoughts a figure suddenly ran past him; bumping his shoulders in the process and snapping him out of his thoughts.

he realized that the person is braking a rule and riddle does not tolerate rule breakers. not on his watch.

riddle ended up chasing after the figure and when he was close enough to the running person he realized that it’s figure oddly look like yours but that couldn’t be you

he remembers sleeping with you in his arms- he even double checked! just to make sure that you were there! so this person must be someone that oddly looks just like you... right?

the mysterious person stopped in front of a mirror and riddle realized that he was back in heartsylabul ‘why would they go here...?’ riddle thought while deeply staring at every move the stranger makes while in a bush hiding from the person.

taking a closer look riddle saw that the stranger was kneeling down in front of a tree that have a huge hollow in it and Is that a portal?!

Riddle was amazed but also suspicious of the person because what if they were a spy? and with that thought Riddle quickly activated his magic; shouting ‘off with your head!’ on the person.

the wind knocked off the hat off of your head and revealing your identity to riddle.

he was confused but there was also a feeling deep inside him- a feeling of uneasiness.

what were you doing here outside on this hour?! (Although he can't say it himself since he's also outside and that would be like scolding his self)

Riddle saw you moving and reaching out your hands towards the portal and that's when he suddenly realized what that portal was. It was the same portal that he read in a book not long ago.

It hit him. You were going home and yet you didn't even bothered to tell him? He felt betrayed and hurt. Hurt by your actions, he's your partner yet why didn't you mention anything about leaving and going home?

Riddle could've at least spend the last remaining time with you and making you feel loved and appreciated with the way he's been neglecting you for the past few days because of school.

If only you told him then he might at least feel a little less sad.

He stood there. unmoving like the statues of the seven when he suddenly feel something wet on his face, was it raining? but he doesn't feel any droplets of water from the dark sky.... the water tastes a bit salty

He touched his face to see what's causing his cheeks to feel wet and his eye sight to become blurry and then he realized... He was crying, why was he crying? he shouldn't cry at all, you left him without saying anything and shedding tears like this is so... pathetic.

But he still loves you and deep down he knows that even after you left him he'll still love you and continue on visiting the rose garden- the same roses and rose bushes you doted on while you were here.

Riddle was going through all of the memories you both shared and it made him feel utterly weak as multiple sobs wrecks from his mouth and letting out screams and yells begging for you to come back while slamming his hands on the tree hollow where you disappeared.

his hands were starting to get scratches from the tree’s hard and scratchy texture- it was starting to bleed but he doesn't care anymore if he wakes anybody up from his yelling or if he’s bleeding; all he cares about is getting you back and hearing your voice that he loves, telling him that it's alright and you're here.

he closed his eyes shut as he clenched his fists waiting for your endearing voice to comfort him

yet he heard none of those words, he didn't hear your voice and he thinks he's unable to hear anymore with all the thoughts suddenly building up inside his head. 

and then he felt it: the ground shaking heavily under him what was happening? an earth quake?

this was all too much for him. he passed out.

....

his eyes suddenly opened as he sat up quickly

“Riddle? Is there something that’s been bothering you? I heard you crying and tossing in your bed so I checked on you..” Riddle can hear the worry from your voice but he quickly wrapped his hands around you tightly as he hid his crying face on your shoulder “Please never leave me my rose..”

azul ashengrotto.

It was happening. the moment that he's been dreading to happen.

azul was looking at the scene that was happening right in front of him, it was you hugging another person's arm and he could clearly see how the both of you seem to be having fun.. having more fun than when you're with him.

with how your cheeks turn a darker color just like how when you were with him and not to mention that the person you were chatting with was the same person who used to have feelings for you and the same goes for you...

.. is this it?

azul knew at some point that in your relationship that you'll leave him for another person but he didn't expect it to be this soon.

azul could only stand there with tears that were threatening to fall down on his face, he wanted to rip you out of that man's arms but he couldn't. his feet were glued to the ground and it was as if he was turned to stone with how he couldn't feel anything nor can he move his body at all

why was this happening? and why did it have to happen on the day of your anniversary?

azul felt like he could burst out crying just like a cry baby but he held himself together because he knew that action would only cause a scene and he doesn't want to embarrass you.

should he approach you? scream? but that would cause a scene and he wouldn't want to humiliate you because even if he can feel his heart shattering to million pieces, he still loves you after all.

his mind was swirling with thoughts and all he wants to do is hide in his room and cuddle with you yet he's guessing that won't happen soon or qnytime at all.

his feet suddenly moved towards you before he could register what he was doing and now he was right in front of you.

he could hear how the joyous sounds you made suddenly disappeared and an awkward tense silent was now present hanging in the air.

he could see how your lips frowned at the sight of him, were you disgusted? azul just wanted to crawl to his octopot and never go out. He has seen you look at other people like that but never did he want you to look at him as if he were the dirt under your shoes.

azul started sweating, his mouth suddenly felt dry even though he just drank a beverage a minute ago. his mouth started opening and then closing- like a fish that was washed up on the shore and out of the ocean.

he feels like he looks so.. disgusting? pathetic? and he knows it.

this was the first time after years that he was reduced to a speechless mess.

and then you said it, you said how tired you were being with him and how you prefer the person next to you rather than him. that was the last straw.

it was so uncharacteristically of him but when he saw the look on your face and after hearing those words coming out from your mouth, he ran. he bolted out of there and straight into his office and luckily his office was near.

he slammed his office's door open and shut it after getting inside, making sure to lock the door as he fell to his knees, sobs wrecking out of him as his chest heaves heavily.

he can't breathe, he felt like throwing up what little food he ate earlier, the familiar feeling of being nauseous and the way his lungs desperately search for air as if he was deprived of oxygen.

azul pressed a hand against his mouth to stop him from puking? to refrain himself producing more of those pathetic sobs that he oh so wishes to stop making? his mind was so clouded and fuzzy that he wasn't even sure, hell he wasn't even sure if he was even thinking thoughts with how his ears are ringing and his mind going blank.

the corners of his eyes were starting to get blurry from his tears and then before he knew it, he passed out and fell to the floor with a heavy thud.

....

he quickly sat up with a gasp as he clenched his chest where his heart is supposed to be, his eyes darting everywhere until it fell on your sleeping form beside him and he realized, was it all a dream? (or perhaps a nightmare would be a better term)

his eyes glazed over at his pillow that was wet (and no it wasn't because he was drooling) his hands went to his face and he felt the tears there- fresh tears. ah, he must've cried silently again if he didn't manage to wake you up

but nonetheless, azul was glad that it was only a dream/nightmare because he isn't sure what he'll do if that were to become a reality.

and with that he laid back down as his arms wrap around you securely, leaving a soft kiss on your forehead. the warmth from your body was enough to comfort him- to remind him that you're here with him, sleeping peacefully in his arms and that was enough to lull him back to sleep.

[fairy-verse]

I know what I'm gonna ask is horrible, but how Cross is gonna react if he sees a troll close to Killer who didn't make attention to his environment °^°

“How are you so blind?! It was right there!”

“It came out of the fucking ground, how was I supposed to notice it?!” Killer shouted back, annoyed despite the slight tremble he still felt in his body. He’d been too near death, but Cross was just too busy yelling and being angry at him to notice that.

“You have to pay attention!”

“Fuck off, Crossy, I was paying plenty—”

“No! No, you were not!” Cross continued to yell, his voice trembling more and more by the second as his vision grew cloudier and cloudier. Killer noticed all too quickly, and his frown began to fade.

“Cross—”

“You nearly died! It could have e—eaten you an—and I was almost too slow! I would have lost you, Killer! Why the fuck won’t you—” a sob cut him off and he frowned deeply as he turned away, furiously wiping at his face as he took a few steps away. “I—I would have—” another sob and he couldn’t keep it back anymore. Falling to his knees, he cried pitifully as waves of sobs and whimpers tormented him to the extent that at first, he didn’t notice the arms that so tightly moved to hold around him.

“I’m sorry. I… I was careless,” Killer admitted, feeling tears sting the edges of his sockets as he buried his face into Cross’ neck. “I’m sorry…”

Cross took no care of his state and brought his own arms around Killer, pulling him closer, nearly crushing him in the process. “I don’t— don’t want to lose you, Killer,” he softly cried, and nuzzled his face against Killer’s shoulder, feeling the small tremble coming from him. He softened his hold, but Killer tightened it again.

Saying nothing, Killer shed his own tears as the silence of the forest fell over them. The troll might be dead, his head cut in half by Cross’ blade, but the animals were not yet ready to ignore the possibility of more danger lurking around.

They sat like that, for a while, holding each other and crying their tension and fear out, until Cross leaned back and caught Killer by surprise, kissing him upon the lips yet as their cheeks were still wet with tears. It was returned in earnest.

“Promise me you’ll be more aware of your surroundings. I just… the thought of you—” Cross began, but Killer cut him off with another kiss, this one almost bruising with the forceful affection behind it.

“My knight in shining armour,” Killer said, smiling softly despite the careful humour in his tone. “I’ll try to be more careful in the future, Crossy. Do you want me to whack every rock and boulder I fly over from now on?”

Cross couldn’t help but laugh. The sound was heavenly to Killer’s ears.

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

Since Pirates in the Caribbean is part of Disney why not add in to twisted wonderland about sirens since we did it before

Liked sirens are never mermaids but former humans who are wrongfully judge, heart broken, or died tragically at sea in a desperate moment an old sea deity answer their call and took their soul and memory for their old lives to be something dangerous to protect themselves to the point even merpeople fears them in the past, but now they are very rare and few between

And when they found true love the siren will die once they birth a child as they can only give their hearts as it's all they have left, but the cures are any descendents will forever have that yearning to be with ocean and if they ever change form by magic will be forever be a siren

What if half fae Snow Leopard whenever they get really stressed or upset they head to any large body of water near home or at school and just change form to cool off and only her closet friends knows about that secret

Let's say Leona, Jade, Azul and Floyd helps her out in her moment of stress and takes her somewhere where she can be in the water in their mer form and safely cry it out as they wanted their mate to feel safe in their moment of being vurnable and her singing an old sailor song " my jolly sailor bold " as it's a comfort song

But Kamil and Lilia an outsider accidentally discovered the secret and listening to her singing

Siren Song? | Yandere Twisted Wonderland x  Half-Fae Leopard Crewel Daughter Reader

Hah! Half-fae Leopard Crewel Daughter Reader? Sorrowfully singing such a heartfelt song and openly relying on others?

It’s the stuff of dreams

Even in this alternate reality, she would sooner die than be saddled with the embarrassment of sharing such pitiful emotion

But she has no connection to Sirens main storyline wise

As previously stated she doesn’t mope, hardly cries

Any and all frustrations are carried out by her violent anger bursts

Now if anything this situation reminds me of a previous situation where making you laugh is the objective

Otherwise, tears will not be shed 

And certainty not in the presence of even her childhood friends 

Let alone the sneaky interlopers

With Kalim, she just might indulge in him

“You’re such a dumb dog I doubt you’ll understand anything of what I’m saying….but that–this situation is disgusting and I hate it. That’s why I absolutely reject it!”

Now with Lilia, she gets far too worked up to even consider whatever there is to brood about

She’d sooner attempt to kill the fae than actually do anything else

“UGH, EVEN HERE THIS PLACE IS INFESTED WITH DIASOMNIA COCKROACHES! I’M GOING TO TEACH YOU A LESSON!”

But I do see swimming as a minor vice to your calming process

If you’re not laughing at someone’s pain and misfortune

You might go for a swim 

But that isn’t usually what you do unless you're goaded into it

“Come on, (Y/n) let’s go for a swim. M-maybe cool off a bit?”

“Cool off!? From what?”

“(Y/n) the tension is teeming–”

“You look like you could commit a murder!”

“Well I know I look killer! But I’m assuming you mean something else….fine. Move out of the way Floyd or I’ll use your head as a stepping stone.”

“Please!”

Leona on the other hand is a master at this and doesn’t need a body of water to cool your jets

Simply his presence, usually impedes your snappy nature anyway

So both of you kitties can relax without the water

[monsterswithimagines]

Undisclosed Desires - Part 33

Joe Goldberg x female!Reader

Masterlist

Warning: suicide attempt

Your mother's service is not at a church, but at a funeral parlor.

I'm not religious, (Y/n). I understand why a church might not be the norm, here. You can have your funeral at a parlor in the states, too! But wow, a Dutch funeral parlor is a very impersonal building. And ugly.

If I was your mom, I would be pretty pissed.

If I was your mother, I would be angry at the turnout, too. There are a lot of people, don't get me wrong, but there is your family squarely on one side and her friends squarely on the other. They do not intermingle and the hostility is palpable.

I'd ask you to explain why that is, but you are not speaking to me. At all. You woke up and ignored me. You haven't said a word of English all day. I am lost in a sea of people, all speaking a language I do not understand.

So much for you loving me. Today, I am the man who killed your mother. The look in your eyes when you happen to glance at me says it all.

You hate that I'm here. Even your family is beginning to give me strange looks because I am so clearly unwanted by you.

Everyone sits in uncomfortable folding chairs. The casket is and remains closed. The director speaks a few words, then several people speak. Your grandma carefully unfolds a note, reads only two words and then bursts into tears, so that your grandfather has to come and take her away.

You go last, and you are not like your grandmother. Your eyes are bone dry, and you do not have a note.

You're in a black dress - I've never seen you in a dress, but despite the circumstances, you look beautiful in one - with your hair up in a ponytail. You are wearing a lot of makeup for once. Which is understandable because when you woke up this morning, you were so pale, it was like we were going to your funeral.

The makeup looks like a mask. On your expressionless face, it may as well be armor.

“When they ask me what my mom was like during my childhood,” you begin.

“I close my eyes and try to imagine something normal to respond.

“But all I can see

“Is a very small version of me.

“Reading books to myself

“And putting myself to sleep.”

There is some murmuring. This is not the kind of poetry you are supposed to recite at someone's burial.

You don't care. You continue to speak, in Dutch now, and slowly the regular sadness returns. At one point, something you say makes everyone laugh, and I chuckle along though I don't know what's funny.

When you are done, you sit down next to me and you don't look at me and I should take your hand, I should support you, but you don't want me to.

The director says some more words, and then the procession outside starts. Your mother is lowered into the ground gently. Your grandmother cries too much to be able to throw some dirt, so you do it twice. Once for her, and once for yourself.

You hold your grandmother's hand, not mine.

After it's over, we get in the car with your uncle, and he drives us back to the AirBnB.

You don't shed a tear until we're inside.

But once the door closes behind us, you crumple.

You go into the bedroom and you close the door behind you - Keep out, Joe - and I can hear you crying, sobbing, and I don't know what to do.

I did this to you. I gave you this pain. I truly believe that once the grief dulls, you will be better off, but that doesn't help you now.

If I had not been so obvious and if you had not known I was the one who took your mother from you, I could have hugged you and made things better.

As things are, I am helpless.

Things go quiet after a while. I let them be quiet for about an hour before I go knocking at the door.

“(Y/n)?”

No answer.

“Do you want some food, or something? I could heat you up some soup.” You haven't eaten all day, after all.

No answer, still.

The door is not locked. I open it slowly, softly, and peek in.

You are on the bed. Your back is to me but I think you are asleep. You are on top of the blankets and you're still wearing your black dress and your shoes, I should take them off and tuck you in.

Then, my eye falls onto something. I don't know why. It's been there for three days.

It's a bottle of pills Nadia gave you on New Year's. She said they would help you sleep, and you told her, firmly, that you weren't planning on taking her medication. That you knew what road that led down.

I barely paid attention to the exchange at the time. You are not a drug addict and I did not think anything of it.

But I have the worst feeling.

I walk over slowly, uncertainly. Your nightstand feels lightyears away but then I'm reaching out, picking up the bottle.

It's empty.

Everything goes out of focus.

I am feeling your neck for a pulse, listening for your breathing. I am carrying you. I am in the shower with you, sitting on the floor underneath the cold spray with you in my lap.

“Don't do this to me,” I hear myself say. “Don't you do this to me.”

My fingers should not be going down your throat and you should not be puking out all that is inside you, which is water and bile and pills. I pull you to my chest and I rock us and I think I have saved your life but you need a doctor, a hospital, and I don't know what number to call.

The first thing I'm aware of that doesn't happen in flashes, is being in the living room, dripping wet, and calling Nadia. I use your phone and Nadia answers with something in Dutch.

I don't know where you are. I don't know where I left you.

“Nadia? It's Joe,” I say. “How do I call nine one one? (Y/n) just tried to kill herself.”

[senkusphone]

Dr. Stone chapter 3D trivia post

Hello, um. I hope yall had a pleasant solstice celebration of your choice- I've been pondering whether what we just saw merits a triva post, but let's try to squeeze some for the sake of completion, shall we?

Check out also my trivia posts for chapters 1D and 2D.

They're the same picture.

It took me way too long to notice what was off in this cover, it seems to be nothing but an aesthetic choice. Other than these off colors, this specific suika melon design first appeared during the Treasure island arc, right after Ryusui punted her off the Perseus.

To directly quote what I wrote at one time on the wiki:

Too bad, the ship Chelsea shows up in is not the Perseus D. Monkey from chapter 214 (which itself is a One Piece reference, as Boichi is a big fan).

Interesting that we get a nearly identical shot, instead of Kohaku standing behind her, it's Ruri and Matsukaze.

This posture done my Matsukaze is called Namaste (with other names such as Namaskar), which is used both as a greeting and as an indication of reverence all over the southern parts of Asia, along with other similar gestures. I know this is familiar to many myself included but I had never looked into the deeper details until now.

Figurines showing this pose have been excavated from the Indus valley civilization dating to between 2700 and 2100 BCE, making this piece of cultural heritage at least 7800 years old by the time of this panel.

Xeno has clearly had his hand in the architecture of the Japan side of the KoS, with some new constructions resembling his own Evil Disneyland back home.

Hold back yer tears

Kaseki has lived well. It's hard to tell how old he is now, he lived longer than the timeline's consistency thats for sure, I blame time travel.

At the time Taiju got wed, he was around 70 years old.

Kaseki and Chrome go back way further than the KoS, the fanbook tells us that Kaseki helped Chrome build his shed when he was just a boy.

Feel your heart a bit shakey? hang on there, we now get to talk about whyman's sorrow, and a small observation that I've made

Whyman can have emotions, the circuits that process that can be switched on and off, but the fact that a message can, or needs to be "left" for themselves, as well as his farewell for all eternity, has an interesting implication: once switched off, whyman loses the recollection of any experience they had in the meantime. These circuits allow whyman to feel, and also to then forget. This is useful, as emotions help them survive, but forgetting prevents the emotional baggage from growing infinitely over a virtually immortal life.

"If we remembered every single parting person, it would only be a few generations before the sorrow would pile up to the point it became unbearable. Maybe it is a blessing to forget. Forgetting allows us to get even. Forget sorrows as new ones replace them. Life can go on, if tragically. No accumulating loss that would one day make everyone struggle to survive and eventually pass on; though that last thing does also sound very much like today."

(10B points to the ~2 people who know where this quote is from, I digress)

So that's cool, and heartbreaking, but so what, does it connect to anything we've seen before?

Well...

In ch. 232 we see that Whyman does not know what created them.

How could that be, if they can remember things over deep time?

Maybe it is that Whyman chose to forget their creators, and everything they felt about them. Beings that they may even have loved in the deep deep past, and could not cope with yearning for.

The blonde, bangs & ponytail lineage.

The village graveyard. Last time we saw it, Byakuya's gravestone was opened to reveal the glass record.

A lot of recognizable headstones are still up now, some appear to have moved.

Other headstones might be gone or be different... The one with four dots that was there originally can't be seen in this new shot but it can be seen later in the chapter.

Also, I hate to break this to you, but there's more headstones now than there were before.

I counted 45 in the original shot, 50 in the new one, not including any that Chelsea and Senku may be covering. Granted this is likely just an oversight.

(I should mention that in order for them to match bottom to bottom, the top image is flipped horizontally).

(omg look at the babiesss)

What Xeno is telling Chrome is that if whyman went and altered their own past, then what they are seeing currently is the result of that, since whatever changes they made, are in the past after all.

They already happened and they are part of the timeline that leads them to where they are now.

Assuming they actually found Byakuya (or a petrified time traveler) means that either whyman created some sort of causal loop that is self sustaining (ie, the ramifications of the changes in the past include whyman going back to do them in the first place), or more in line with the many worlds hypothesis, that going back to the past and changing it creates a new parallel timeline where the repercussions of that happen, with no effect in the first one.

In the latter case it means the timeline we see now was altered by the whyman from a parallel universe.

The stone axe is a bit dissonant with where they are, technologically speaking, yes? Thing is, that's the one Senku took to the moon with him.

He's had it since chapter 1.

A few people I've seen mystified about this structure they unearthed at the cementery:

This is a collapsed building just like the structures that the Tsukasa empire occupied.

(shoutout to that guy about to die in the back)

Interestingly, this means that Ishigami Village is established on top of a once urban area.

I am always pumped for any extra bits of village lore I can get.

Did Suika's handwriting trigger your AI generated image senses? it did for me.

We were bamboozled again. If it ends up happening it's gonna be like the tale of the wolf. The moment we stop taking it seriously, Inagaki is gonna smack us across the head with it.

We were actually preparing for the poop on a stick to hit the f.a.a.n on discord. What do I make about the ending? I don't know, I got no big analysis this time around but I believe it's very likely we'll see more at some point.

[argumentl]

The Freedom of Expression - Vol:21, Discussing Nouteikarano2.

(LONG POST* Starts with with Hanshin talk, but leads into very interesting talk about Kaoru's artistic process)

K: Ok, here we go, this is the Freedom of Expression. I'm Kaoru from Dir en grey. 

J: And I'm Joe Yokomizo, not Miura Jun. 

K: Haha

T: Im Tasai from Tokyo Sports. 

J: Ok, so here we are again...Kaoru, you must be happy about that thing, right? 

T: Oh, THAT, right?

J: Yeh, that! 

K: You keep saying 'that'. 

J: Say it yourself then!

K: That pineapple thing?

J: No, no. 

T: Yes, yes, it is that!

J: Eh? Is it?? I dont even know the details!

T: Haha 

J: Look, they know what 'THAT' is in the comments! 

K: Its the pineapple thing. 

T: Yep 

J: Eh?! Whats the pineapple thing? Is that right??....Ok, yeahhh, the pineapple thing!! 

K, T: Hahaha 

J: Congratulations! *applause*

K: Yeah, congratulations. 

J: The Hanshin Tigers won at last! They conquered the Central League! Is that the expression people use?

K: Yes, thats right. 

J: Congratulations! *applause*

T: Its the first time in 18 years, right? 

J: What were you doing at that moment?

K: I was watching it...Uh, we it got into the bottom of the ninth innings, I was thinking OMG! I was getting really excited, like OMGOMG! 

J, T: Hahaha 

K: But then Sakamoto got a home run, and I suddenly got really calm, like, 'oh wow'...and when they won, I was like, 'Okay, good job!'. Haha

J: You calmed yourself down for the actual moment?

K: Yeah 

J: Someone asked, 'Did you cry?'

K: A little bit, a few tears of joy. 

J: Well, you would shed a tear after 18 years. 

T: Of course you would. 

K: Yeah. 

J: So what happens after this? I have no idea how it works. 

K: Well, the Climax series starts soon, and if they get through that, they will go onto the Nihon series. 

J: Ah, after 18 years..

K: Its true that they actually won the Central League, but I never thought they would, haha. Even up until the last minute, other teams' fans were certain Hanshin would win this, but it was only the Hanshin fans going, 'Ahh, still not sure' Haha. Something was bound to get in the way. 

T: Haha 

J: Haha, in the bottom of your heart, you really don't trust them, do you? You love them, but you can't trust them.

K: Haha, something could come along and knock them down at the last minute.

J: Well, I guess no-one knows when the team in second place will catch up. That could even be the Hanshin Tigers, right?

T: There was one point where they were about level with Hiroshima, but began taking the lead again after that. 

K: Yeah, the same happened with DeNa too, but then they ran away with the lead. 

T: They did. 

K: September was incredible. They had 11 wins in a row. 

J: It might be unlucky to say this? But will they be ok getting to the Nihon series? Haven‘t they used up all their success already? 

K: Yeah, at the moment they are on a downward spiral...but they did actually win today's game. 

J: But they are only throwaway matches now, right? So it doesn't matter. 

K: Yeah, but there is still the players' individual stats to consider. 

J: Oh, leader titles? 

K: Yeah, and they really should try to keep up their form to suceed in the next stages. 

J: I see, so they need to remain vigilant, but for now at least the fans can shed a few relieved tears at this 18 year in the waiting win. 

K: Yes. So, as for next month....next month is the Climax series. I think it starts on the 18th, right? If it all goes as normal, Hanshin should have three games on the 18th, 19th, and 20th. If they win those, they will get to the Nihon series. BUT...if they end up with a 4th match on the 21st, we will watch it live here. 

J, T: Ohh!

*applause*

J: Hang on though, what if they don't have a 4th match?? 

K: In that case we could just celebrate them getting to the Nihon series, or play baseball themed games or something. haha. 

T: Well, yeah, it will be a celebration. 

K: If there is no Hanshin game on that day, that means they already won the Climax series, so I'm honestly quite happy even if there is no game that day. 

J: It has nothing to do with this show really, right? Haha 

T: Thats right. 

K: I just want them to win. 

J: Yeah, thats your first priority. So that is the plan for the October broadcast anyway. Will they make it through the next series? Who knows? But everyone, keep your hopes up. Ok, so we are still requesting questions and comments from viewers. If you have any thoughts, requests, ideas, anything...please write them in the comments section. Twitter users can....Oh its not called twitter anymore, is it? X users can post with the hashtag TFOE. So, this show is free for everyone during the first half, but the second half is for members only. If you become a member, you can watch this in the archives for a year, and also enjoy a members only video in the coming days. You can become a member using the link which is at the top of your screens now, Leader point to it please. So please do join and enjoy the show to the end. Ok, so before we get onto the main talk, does everyone remember us going to Shimokitazawa last time? Did you all watch it? We are currently taking entries from channel members to win these viewer presents! Here they are! First is a Phalaris LP signed by Kaoru. And next is Björk's album Biophilia, which Kaoru selected at Disc Union.

K: Tasai, can you get Björk to sign this for us?

T: Eh?!! How?? Where even is she now??

K: Hahaha! 

J: You could ask Hiranabe to do his gyōza signature on it?

T: Haha yeh. 

J: There might be someone out there who wants Hiranabe's Björk gyōza signature! Anyway, we will give these away, so if you want either of these please go to the show's blog and place your entry. That's the Phalaris LP and also Biophila by Björk, as chosen by Kaoru. Ok, now for today's talk....Was it running until yesterday? Yes, thats right, today its a special broadcast to talk about Kaoru's art exhibition, Nouteikarano2! *applause* I think a lot of you probably went to see it. Thank you to everyone who did. There may be many people who couldn't make it due to their schedule though, so Leader, can you tell us what kind of exhibition it was? Give us the basics. Oh, someone commented, 'It was great!' Thank you! Oh, and 'I went!'

K: Thank you. Well, 4 years ago I put on an exhibition of representations of the dark dreams I had when I was a kid, and this time was a kind of imagining of the continuation of those dreams. Thats the idea I started with. But at the same time, these images are still just coming naturally out of my head, the same place they came from last time. So thats why I decided to use the same title, Nouteikarano. 

J: So, you held the exhibition in Tokyo and Osaka this time?

K: Yes

J: How was that? Was there anything you were particularly conscious of by holding it in two locations?

K: Well, in Tokyo, as well as the art, there was a display of various items from my past, things I used when I was a kid etc. Those teru teru bōzus were there too. So I displayed these to show some of my personal things along with my art. The Osaka venue was really small, so I just displayed the art there, but it was a chance to see the art at much closer range than in Tokyo. 

J: I see, so with the larger capacity in Tokyo, you were able to show some of those memories. And as Osaka was so small, you could get a close range view?

K: Yes. 

J: Both myself and Tasai visited the Tokyo exhibition, didn't we? Tasai what did you think? 

T: I couldn't believe how much Kaoru revealed. It wasn't Kaoru from that band, it was Kaoru the person. With those toys and things, I thought it was very revealing. It was exciting. Like, a strange kind of excitement. Joe, what did you think? 

J: Well, we are gonna talk about which pieces we liked later, but...of course I went to see the first Noiteikarano too, and I saw the high quality of work then. But this time it seemed to be on a much deeper level. It felt overwhelmingly deep. We'll have a look soon, but I couldn't get the images out of my head, they had a big impact on me. If any of the viewers went, please write your thoughts and impressions in the comments too. Ok, so moving on, next myself and Tasai will be asking Kaoru a few questions about Nouteikarano2, but if viewers have questions, please send them too.  That goes for both people who have seen the paintings and for people who haven't. We'll be happy to take your questions. Ok, Tasai! What do you want to ask first?

T: Hmm, should we take a look at the photos? 

J: Ok, lets first look at photos of the venue. 

T: This is Tokyo? 

K, J: Yes. 

T: People in Osaka may not have seen this yet. 

K: Yeah, so this is what you saw as soon as you entered. 

J: When choosing the venue, you have to think about how the art will appear in the place, right?

K: Yeah

J: Im sure you checked out a few different venues this time, but it was quite interesting entering this particular venue. 

K: Well, it was underground, down that narrow staircase, haha. 

J: Yes, its like it was hidden, or a secret den or something. Going down there was almost like a ritual to enter Kaoru's mind. Ah, someone commented, 'The lighting was cool'. 

T: Someone is asking how you figured out the order in which to display them. 

K: Well, I had a fixed order pretty much prepared in advance, but unless you actually put them in place, you can't know how well it will work. For example, with that painting on the right of the photo, I originally planned to hang paintings on either side of it too. But it didn't quite work out in reality, so I left it as one. You really have to test it out to know if it will work. I went there with an idea of the order, but I didn't know how it would go till I tried it. 

J: It depends on the type of wall too probably. 

K: As for deciding what to include in the space, this is what I came up with.

J: Ahh, can we look at another photo? 

K: Ok, so this is if you turn left from the first photo. 

J: Yeah, I think we'll take a look at individual paintings soon, but those two red and green paintings at the far left side, did you paint those while I was there? 

K: No no, those were there from the start. Can you see that tiny one above those two? I painted that in the venue. All the others shown there were there from the start. 

J: I see, only that small one at the top, between the red and green ones. It seems like the viewers understand. 

K: Can you see those small squares under the red and green ones? The tshirt im wearing is from those. 

J: Oh, I see....So that area on the left out of shot is where you were doing your live painting?

K: Yes 

J: Were you there the whole time? No? Just sometimes?

K: Sometimes I went, sometimes I didn't. 

J: You were painting there, right? 

K: Wasn't I painting while you were there?

J: When I got there, you were in that area, but you came out to talk to me when you saw me. There was an unfinished painting on your desk, it looked like you were in the middle of painting. So, I thought 'Ahh, this is where he paints them'.��

T: Someone commented 'The live painting was amazing!' 

J: Ah, now we are getting these kind of comments. Ok, lets see the next photo. 

T: Is this the entrance? 

K: Well, after you get inside there was the merch corner, and this wall kinda lead to that. On the otherside of this wall was all my stuff. 

J: Ah, your childhood things etc. Did you draw all this on the wall while you were there? 

K: Yeah, we actually made this wall. So it was ok to draw on it. We've already torn this down. 

J: No way!

K: Yeah, we were gonna discard it anyway, so it was ok to draw on it. 

J: Someone commented, 'The drawings increased day by day'. Ah, that means it looked a lot different on the first and last days. Agh, you already discarded it?? People are saying they want it! 

K: Isn't it too big?

J: Well, I mean, you could cut it up and make it into NFTs or something? Ah, a comment saying you should make it into a present. Hey, I want you to come to my home and draw art on the walls!

K: Really?? You'll let me draw anything, right? 

J: No, not ANYTHING...

K: Hahaha 

T: No no, you have to let the artists follow their inspiration! 

J: Yeah thats true, but I know he would end up pranking me. Like, what if just he drew loads of dicks or something?? 

K: Haha, just let me draw anything I like!

J: No no, not ANYTHING. This is my home! Draw something that would impress any women I bring over, that kind of thing. Not just ANYTHING. 

K: Haha 

T: Hey, do those mouth/face characters have a name? 

K: No, I just tried drawing one, and it turned out quite fun, so I drew a bunch of them. 

J: Ahh, I see. Actually, how many paintings were there in total? 

K: *counts in head* Hmm, maybe 15 or 16. It might be more, if you include the small ones. 

J: Ah, someone said there were 18 in Osaka. We spoke about this before, but this time there were more bigger paintings compared to last time, right? 

K: Yes 

J: Also, how long did it take you to paint them?

K: Well, I first started painting the big pieces in February this year. And then I was finished them in June. So I finished them then, and worked on the smaller and medium sized ones around the same time. 

T: How do you actually get a painting started? What goes through your head before you make the first brush stroke? 

J: Ah, yeh! Cause we only see the finished product, right? 

K: Well, nothing specific. If I'm using a white canvas, I will usually cover it all black first. And then I will apply white over that and do the actual painting on that. In that way, the black comes through in sections where I erase any parts, and gives it a kind of hazy effect. It makes it more atmospheric than just painting on the bare canvas. So yes, I usually start by covering it black. 

J: Well, you did explain some of the pieces to me, but when you start, do you have a vision of what you want it to look like when its finished, or any kind of rough sketch? 

K: No. If I did, I'd just end up following that, and it would get boring.   

J: So, its not the case that having a rough sketch beforehand allows you to easily see when you've finished? 

K: No, you'd just be following the sketch, it wouldn't be exciting at all. 

J: I see, it would be more like completing a job, and less like a creative challenge. 

T: Conversely, how do you know when you've finished a piece?

K: Like, 'This'll do'... haha 

J: So you feel that moment? You don't feel like painting any more after that? 

K: Wel, I can..but usually its just like, 'Hmm, this is about right'. 

T: Are there any similarities to song writing?

K: Well, with songwriting the other members are there, I can check with them, and ask what they think. Here, its just me, so I just think to myself, 'Hm, I think its done'. I'm free to go in whichever direction I choose with this too. 

J: Some of the pictures have titles too, right? Do the titles correlate (*J uses the word 相関性 for this*) with the images?...I mean, I guess they do, right? 

K: What does 相関性 mean? 

J: Like, do the titles have meaning in relation to the pictures? 

K: Yes, they do. I wasn't intending to use titles at all at first...but then when I saw the finished art...Words create a lot of bias though, right? They pull you in their direction. 

J: At what stage did you create the titles?

K: Right at the end, some of them only just in time. 

T: Can we see another photo? Ah, this is the painting titled 'Doko made mo'. It really does seem difficult finding the words to describe this. 

K: Yeah 

J: Yeah, a name can pull you one way, and it can exclude other interpretations. 

T: Next photo, how do you read this title? 

K: This is 'Matsuretsu no yukue' (末列のゆくえ) 

T: I like this one. 

J: Its mainly monotone, but there is a splash of colour there too. 

T: Kaoru, I wanted to ask if there is any meaning behind the way you use red and green in your art? 

J: Yeah, in the eyes of Kaoru, what are colours? 

K: Hm, there isn't really any meaning behind the colours. They just somehow...

T: They just appear from you?

K: Hmm, yeah. There is no special meaning behind different colours. 

J: A comment asks 'Where does the last row begin from?' The left or right side? (*Im not sure of the translation of 末列/matsurestu, but Im goin with 'last row'. Open to corrections*) 

K: It begins on the right side.

J: Ok, next photo, this is titled 'Inuka'. Is the intonation ok? Like, INuka?

K: Haha, yes, INuka. 

J: Not inuKA, right?

K: Haha, no. 

J: People seem to really like this one. This was on one of the tshirts too wasn't it?

K: Yes. 

J: Yeah, someone said Inuka is their fave. Its mine too! (*Joe pronounces it 'inuKA' by mistake*)

K: Its 'INuka', haha. 

J: Haha, sorry. By the way, what does this title mean? 

K: Well, some of my friends and people who saw it asked, 'Is it a dog??' (これ犬か？？/kore inu ka??)

J: (speaking English) 'Is this dog?? Is this dog??' No? 

K: Haha...no, it looks like its been shot through (��抜かれてる/inukareteiru) . So thats why I called it 'Inuka'. 

J: Ahhh, I see. It kinda looks like the silhouette of a dog at the top though. Yes, this was my favorite. Can I ask a quick question about this? Is it ok?  That white section in the middle, tell me how you created that part. That white line. 

K: I used tape to create a clean line, then pulled the tape off. 

J: So thats the result after pulling the tape off.  It looks amost like a hole. As it happens, the day after I first saw this, I was working with the modern artist Gunji Pegio-Yukio who belongs to the Science and Engineering Department at Waseda University. I was asking him where creativity comes from, and for him it comes from connection to the outer realm. We humans live in the inner realm, but if you can somehow connect with that outer realm, then inspiration will fall down to you. According to him, humans can train themselves to reach that other realm, but as for art, an important element in any finished work is the existence of a hole-like area somewhere, so that things from the outer realm can fall into it. Its like a portal from this realm to the outer realm that you can pass through and back again. I mean, it doesn't have to be a hole, anything that looks like it could draw you in, or that the other realm could come through from, something that really impacts the image. I was just coincidentally talking about this with him. Anyway, so with this piece I feel like there is a connection to the other realm with that white hole. So I really did like this picture. I felt like I could reach the other realm through this. I mean, this is just my personal take. Yes, so this picture Inuka lined up perfectly with my talk with Gunji san. Can we see any more pictures?

K: Thats all for now. 

T: Honestly, Im so impressed with your energy Kaoru, being in a band and creating all this art. Where does it come from?

K: Well, I just like making things. 

J: Which was the most difficult piece to make this time? 

K: Well, with the big paintings, you want them to be kind of intense, right? I didn't want them to be mediocre. I was trying to avoid that. 

J: How do you avoid it?

K: Well, just going up close and working on each part in detail. I was looking closely at every part. 

T: Its really interesting to me how you get the right balance of feelings in your work. You have that unique font that you created too. I always find that really interesting. 

J: Someone asked, 'Any photos of Osaka?'. Unfortunately we only have photos of Tokyo today. But Kaoru, both the Tokyo and Osaka runs are over now, so tell us how you feel about how it went. 

K: Well, I was slightly nervous about the whole thing before it started. Like, how would people take to it?...Cause I've never studied art or anything like that, I didn't think the pictures I did were all that great, I just like drawing. So I just wanted people to come and have a look they felt like it. When I had them finished, I lined them all up in the apartment I was renting, and I was really concerned that they weren't that good. But after I saw them all displayed in the exhibition, I actually felt that they do actually appear kind of interesting. So I was pleased about that.

J: Ok, so the first part of the show is gonna end soon.

T: That was quick! You wanna ask more questions, right everyone?

J: I'm sure they do, but time is limited unfortunately. We don't have Toshi-Low here to draw our time out forever.

K: Haha

J: Ok, so in the second part, we have a piece of art to show you especially. We talked earlier about how Kaoru was doing live painting at the exhibition, and this is one of the pieces he completed there, right?

K: Yes

J: Anyone who was at the last day in Tokyo might have seen it already, but those who went to Osaka will not have, neither will people who went to the earlier Tokyo days. So we will show this exclusively in the second part, please look forward to that. We will also hear a lot more talk from Kaoru, so please keep sending in your questions. Additionally, since the theme of the exhibition stemmed from Kaoru's dreams, we also have a dream themed activity planned, so please become a member to get a closer look into Kaoru's mind. Ok, I'll let you know how you can watch the second half. The second half is for channel members only, so if you want to watch it you will need to register. If you become a member, you will be able watch this broadcast in the archives for a year, and there will also be an extra members only video posted in the coming days. Thats right, there is the link at the top of the screen, Kaoru is pointing to it. Please use this blue link to become a channel member. When you click the link, you will get a page asking you to choose your payment method. Choose your prefered method, click proceed, then enter your details. Thats it. So if you haven't joined yet, please do so to see Kaoru's art in the second part. Also, as we said at the beginning, we are taking entries to win the prizes from Shimokitazawa last time. The prizes are for members only and two winners will be picked by lottery. The prizes are a Phalaris LP signed by Kaoru, and Björk's Biophilia as picked by Kaoru in Disc Union. Please go to this show's blog to enter. Kaoru, do you have any announcements?

K: I do! Well, its still the month after next, but the tour will start then.

J: So you're in the preparation stage? Just taking it slowly?

K: Well, there is still a lot to sort out. But we have the setlist already.

J: Ohhh, yeah, people are looking forward to that. Ok, so as per the tour things are moving!

K: Yes

T: When I think of it, the last year has gone by in a blink. Already the next tour on its way.

J: Your nostrils are really flared!

T: Haha, no, I just mean, I envy the fans having so much to look forward to.

J: But Tasai, you have loads of gyoza stuff to enjoy, right?

T: Well...

K: Isn't that fun?

T: Yeah, I suppose so.

J: Anyway, we will have a short break here, members just wait there. You still have time to become member! Ok, second part next, quick break! Bye bye, see you later.

[chunkypossum]

I know one or two people are waiting for a new chapter on Kerosene over on Ao3 so here is an update!

It’s complete!

… Sort of … Kerosene is completely written including:

25-30 chapters (some might be broken into two as I edit)

2 epilogues in a ‘choose your own ending’ style

1 chapter in an entirely new fic that jumps off from the end of one of the epilogues.

So the next steps in the process will be:

edit the drafts of chapters 20-30.

Then I will check through the whole thing for inconsistencies. I think some minor things might need to be changed in previous chapters.

Update past chapters, tags and descriptions

Set up a posting schedule for the last few chapters!

If you think you wanna be on a tag list for this fic just dm me and let me know.

Excited to share the rest of this story with y’all! For spoilers without context for new chapters scroll to the end …

There is something sinister targeting the courts of Prythian and the Night Court’s Spymaster finds it increasingly aggravating that he can’t pinpoint the source. What will he decide to do when he is faced with the possibility of losing so much, even things he didn’t realize he had?

TW: violence, torture, child abuse, contains smut 18+ only please!

Ch. 1 Snippet.

Drip. Drip…… Drip. The echo of water on stone is his only lullaby, his only steady comfort in a world of darkness. Darkness so deep it has settled in his bones and manifested itself in wisps of consciousness that skate over his skin cooling the still healing burns on his hands. If it weren’t for the comfort of the shadows Azriel wasn’t sure he would have bothered waking up after passing out during the torture his brothers had put him through. His father had been furious at Azriel for allowing them the opportunity to do such damage.

‘I had a plan that is wasted now unless you regain use of your hands.’ He had screamed, spittle from his mouth hitting Azriel on his cheeks, already damp from his useless tears. Azriel knew he messed up when he trusted that his brothers meant him no harm. He had always been desperate for their attention, even if that attention ultimately hurt him, which it always did. He thought this time might be different, and in a way it was different, it was much worse than it ever had been before. Apparently, lighting bugs on fire until they popped had lost its charm and they had wanted to see what his flesh would look like as it bubbled and crisped under their ministrations. They had been delighted.

Eventually, he had passed out from the pain, waking up only briefly to hear his father screaming at him before passing out again. At some point, his hands had been bandaged but they still felt like they were on fire. IT was a feeling he would live with for a long, long time.

Azriel didn’t know what it meant to die but death’s song sang to him anyway. It had sounded so sweet in that inky blackness of his mind and he had been so tempted to follow it wherever it led. It was only those shadows, incessantly tugging and whispering to him that kept him tethered to his body.

Not yet. Not now.

They chattered.

Someday. Someday. Not yet. Not now.

‘I’m ready now.’ He tried to tell them but they just brushed cool tendrils into his matted, shaggy curls rousing him from blissful sleep.

The smell of stagnant water and decaying moss in his lightless cell greeted him first, even before the pain of the burns. That pain rose slowly to greet him as he opened his eyes and sat up. Little whimpers escaped his lungs and fell away in the dark while he tried not to bend or flex his fingers beneath the bandages.

Azriel could taste the salt caking his cheeks still damp with tears he had been shedding even in his sleep. The shadows whispered snippets of conversation to him they had gathered from the house and village above and around him and his young brain pieced together the news. His brothers had been sent away to his father’s country estate to the south somewhere, someplace he would never see. The villagers had eagerly spread the news that his sons had been spirited away in the night, a scandal that they were desperate to learn more about. No one could truthfully claim they knew the whole truth, yet many tried.

Azriel didn’t understand most of what was said, but what had become horribly obvious to him was the fact that no one mentioned him at all. Not that it was expected, he had known his father kept him locked away for a reason but he hadn’t realized that reason was to make sure no one knew he even existed down here.

Maybe he didn’t exist. That thought was almost comforting until a pain, bright and hot, exploded from his hands as he absentmindedly tried to clench them into fists. He nearly passed out from the pain but as quick as it bloomed, the shadows were there, soothing and banking the fire cutting across his skin. If he existed he must be crazy at the very least, to find friends in the shadows. That must be why his father would rather people don't know he existed, something was wrong in him, broken in him....

You can find the rest on Ao3

_______________________

Spoilers without context for the new chapters:

[bastionbibi]

Hi it’s me the Drabble Anon again didn’t mean to hurt ya so here’s another drabble hope you like it I’m sorry have a good day:

Taka’aki sighs as he exits from his car, rubbing his tired eyes. The case he had been tackling was both exhausting and tedious and he might have skipped a few hours of rest in the process but finally, he was home. His father would have chided him for staying up so late, he always ensured that he and Hiromitsu get proper rest and his mother would make the best tea for sleep. He wished that he asked for how to make that tea from her sooner…

A sudden meow interrupted his train of thought and Taka’aki looks down, blinking in surprise upon seeing a white cat at his doorstep, curled up on his welcome mat. The cat had black patches around it’s face, the little lines above it’s mouth almost resembles a moustache. It reminds Taka’aki of Zhuge Liang, much to his amusement.

“I apologise, did I wake you?” Taka’aki asked, taking note of the cat’s wet fur before looking back at the heavy rain that’s still pouring down since the last hour. It was easy to deduce why the cat is here and Taka’aki knew he can’t leave the poor cat out soaking wet.

“It must be cold for you... I have something that can dry you off.” Taka’aki says as he unlocks the door and steps inside, making sure the cat followed in the process. He makes a mental note to mop the floor as he follows the small wet paw prints the cat leaves behind as it wanders in. Removing his shoes, Taka’aki heads straight for his linen closet to get a towel only to stop when he noticed the door to the closet was open. Odd, he always keeps his doors closed but before he could ponder on if he forgot, one of the stacks of towels suddenly tipped over, dropping into a heap on the floor. That caught Taka’aki’s attention as he steps over and examines the closet to see if there was anything that could have tipped the towels over but there wasn’t anything, not even a mouse. How odd…

Taka’aki feels the cat’s wet tail brushed against his legs and he quickly refocused back on the cat. “Ah, my apologies little one. Here, this should clean you up.”

The cat was strangely compliant as Taka’aki dries it up with the towel, maybe it knew that he was trying to help. Taka’aki made sure to be gentle as possible, remembering how his dear friend Aoi would teach him when he offered to help her clean her cats. He absentmindedly chuckled as he recalled how Kansuke’s shirt was shredded by those very cats.

“There we go, that should be better now.” Taka’aki says as he finishes drying up the cat, watching it meow in appreciation before circling around him and wandering to the dining room. Taka’aki follows its movement and that’s when he noticed a cup on the table alongside a piece of paper and a pen. Cautious, Taka’aki takes the cup first, examining its contents and instantly, he’s hit with a wave of nostalgia.

This tea… it’s the same as the one his mother would make, but how?.. No, he can’t drink it, it might be poisonous and yet… As Taka’aki notices the open cupboards of his kitchen with various things shifted and a few even knocked over, he can’t help but feel like that’s not the case. Something in his mind tells him that it isn’t.

Still, he needs to be sure so Taka’aki turns to go to his study room and get something to test the tea for poison but a glance at the paper gave him pause. There was a note in the paper, written in a crude and shaky manner yet Taka’aki immediately recognised that handwriting, even after all this time, how could he ever forget his brother’s handwriting? Slowly taking the note, he reads what it says out loud; “‘We’re okay, don’t worry Taka’aki-nii. We love you and we’re here for you. - Hiro, Dad, Mom, Aoi’.”

Warmth fluttered in his heart and it took a moment for Taka’aki to register the tears rolling down his cheeks. When was the last time he shed these tears of happiness?

His thoughts were interrupted when he hears the sound of the pen dropping and his eyes widen as he sees the pen rise into the air and fall, almost like someone is struggling to pick it up. Normally people would scream or question it but somehow, Taka’aki could tell who it was, it would certainly explain the toppled towels and the tea.

“It’s alright, I’m fine.” Taka’aki reassured to no one but he knew that they were listening. He quickly wiped away his tears and smiled, “Thank you for the tea, you all must have taken a lot of effort to make it and write the note for me.”

The cat leapt onto his lap as a faint, ethereal warmth enveloped his body like a hug. As Taka’aki sips the tea, savouring the nostalgic taste he never thought he would have again, his heart sings knowing that he’s not as alone as he thought.

Ok, first and foremost, I’m sorry, I completely forgot that I haven’t answered this, goldfish memory as my friend used to say. 

But I have to. Oh my god. LIKE. Christ this HURTS and I love how you keep hurting me but in the nicest way in a way that yes im suffering but Komei got some happiness in his life in the limited way that he can. 

LIKE I JUST. THE WAY HE KEEPS REMEMBERING HIS FAMILY, HOW THEY WOULD REACT, WHAT THEY WILL SAY AND WHAT THEY WILL DO??/? I’m always so sad that we barely get any background story of Morofushi family. The fact that Taka’aki had to see his young, extremely traumatized little brother separated from him just because of what? Money? Necessity? They can’t handle two kids so they just separate— WELL YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!! 

ALSO AAAAAAAAAAAH KOMEI CAT MENTION!!! HE GOT A CAT THAT LOOKS LIKE HIM IM GOING TO CRY???? U know how cat adopts their humans well now Taka’aki has a new cat im sorry i dont make the rules its his now. 

And now… 

SKREEEE When I told u I squealed when THEY started appearing… 

Like, you know those are some strong poltergeist, but if I knew it was someone that I love, i’d live with the ghost ngl. 

IT’S JUST. THE FACT THAT. HIS FAMILY IS TRYING SO HARD TO REACH HIM AND I. Like they’re really just haunting his house huh, I wonder if Hiro can follow him, you know how guardian angels act?? Maybe he can act like that for him too look I don’t know alright im just crushed with emotions right now. 

And Komei cat might be possesed too who knows i love him any way. 

I’m sad and happy at the same time. Thanks anon i love u i hope you have a great day i hope your AC is working smoothly i hope your lunch today was delicious and your pillows stays cool.