#but not as much as Amazon wants you to BUY NOW over (add to wish list in smallest font possible also grey text)
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pearls-gone-wild · 5 months ago
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This is instantly recognizable as a work nightmare to anyone who's ever worked in software, particularly web interface design, particularly anything governmental. Giveaways include:
Lots of "academic and online discourse", with the subtext that folks are offering strong opinions uncontaminated by actual experience with vaccine clinical trials AI development space-time anomalies triggered by overuse of temporal highways
Bureaucratic football between governments and transnational organizations
Mobile app UI that uses font size, background coloring, and button size to scream at the user "NO REALLY IT WAS A TRICK OF THE LIGHT"
i had a dream that time travel was invented and too many people choose to travel back in time to save the titanic from sinking (the question of whether unsinking of the titanic deserved so much attention in the face of human history was the subject of both heavy academic and online discourse), which caused a rift in the space-time-continuum that led to the titanic showing up indiscriminately all over the world’s oceans and sea in various states of sinking.
this caused a lot of issues both in terms of fixing said space-time-continuum and in terms of nautical navigation, and after a long and heavy battle in the international maritime organization it was decided that the bureaucratic burden of dealing with this was to be upon Ireland, much to their dismay. the Irish Government then released an app for all sailors and seafarers so they could report titanic sightings during their journeys, even though they heavily dissuaded you from reporting them given the paperwork it caused.
anyway i woke up with a clear image of the app in my head and needed to recreate it for all of you:
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nickgerlich · 2 months ago
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What's In Your Cart
You’ve got to give Amazon a lot of credit. Starting in 1995, they proceeded to change the way we shop. Starting first with an online bookstore, then expanding into music, movies, and then pretty much everything under the sun, we learned to how shop online thanks to them. While they weren’t the first (Powell’s Books, for example, beat Amazon by a year), they were certainly the best known.
And they are now a household word, to the point that their name has been verbified.
Amazon Prime, which debuted in 2005, taught us to shop often and enjoy unlimited two-day shipping. Rather than aggregate purchases like before that time, in an effort to reduce shipping costs, this helped us shop on impulse. It became even more pronounced once we had an app to do this. I am extremely guilty of it.
Not a company to necessarily be tied to the online arena, Amazon has slowly been tweaking its entree into the brick and mortar realm. It has launched, folded, and relaunched various iterations of mini supermarkets, and in 2017, it purchased the Whole Foods chain, which has more than 500 units. It was at Whole Foods that last year it launched “palm pay” technology.
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At about the same time, though, the company realized its “Just Walk Out” program at other stores was not cutting it. Between erroneous charges and theft, it was posing a cash drain on the firm.
Today, we find Amazon opening four more Amazon Fresh stores in selected locations across the country. It is now using its proprietary Amazon Dash Carts, a smart shopping cart, as well as the palm pay that has been successful at Whole Foods.
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Imagine a shopping cart with a massive computer apparatus where you would normally place your purse or small child. This device has a scanner and scale, and knows where you are in the store at all times. Shoppers can add and delete items easily, and if they logged in to their account, can finalize their transaction and walk out. Otherwise, go through a traditional checkout, where you can pay the old fashioned ways, or wave your palm.
I love it! I just wish one of these stores were a little closer. For now, I will have to be content with Whole Foods in Dallas and other large cities whenever I visit. Believe me, it feels very empowering to just wave my hand over a scanner.
By now you might be wondering whatever happened to online ordering, home delivery, and curbside pickup. These are still things, of course, but Amazon wisely realizes that shoppers actually want to go to a physical store at least some of the time. I consume a lot of fresh veggies and fruit, and like to inspect before I buy.
Then there’s the process of discovery, something that is harder to accomplish online even with the best suggestion engines. For example, I love perusing Whole Foods’ expansive fresh produce department for oddities, like romanesco, red kale, purple cauliflower, rambutan, and many other rarities. I am implicitly asking Whole Foods—and Amazon—to wow me.
While palm pay has done well, thanks in large part to the fact that unless someone chops off my hand or handcuffs me to go shopping, the jury is still out on the Dash Carts.
Amazon is trying hard to speed up the shopping process, especially the end of it when we have to either self-check or wait in line for an employee to do it. By allowing us to do it throughout the entire shopping visit, we are basically one tap away from heading to the car after we enter the last item.
Sure, there will always be pushback. Some folks are put off by palm pay, fearing privacy as well as the Mark of the Beast and all that end times stuff. Others may be fearful of all the technology, especially the smart carts. Business critics may argue that a touchscreen showing your running total may hamper impulse purchases, because shoppers are fully aware of the bill as they go along. Oh, and then there’s the fact that these carts cost up to $10,000 apiece, and could easily be damaged if left outside. Never mind the homeless person who decides one of these might just be perfect for wheeled conveyance of his possessions.
Regardless, though, we are experiencing change writ large, and Amazon continues to push the needle. In spite of those who may never buy into it all, collectively we have accepted everything Amazon has done in the last 29 years. Perhaps someday we’ll be able to enter a store and see smart shelves illuminating our frequent purchases, view personalized messages on the screen, or even hear voices if we’re wearing Air Pods.
I’m down with it all. Anything to keep shopping trips exciting.
Dr “I’ll Wave As I Go Buy” Gerlich
Audio Blog
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shop-korea · 1 month ago
Video
youtube
Sabrina Carpenter - A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes
I - TRIED - 2 - FIND - DIANA - DARK - HAIR - 2 THE YES
SHOULDERS - SHE - WAS - AT - L SIDE - FR - EXPRESS
COMPUTERS - WHO - U - RENT - LAPTOPS - OF - MAIN
LIBRARY - BUT - SHE - WAS - GONE - BUT - ABOVE
SAID - SHE’s - ON - THE - FIRST - FLOOR
SABRINA - SANG - ‘NEVER - GIVING - UP - OUR DREAM’
SO - ASKED - A - BLK - LIBRARIAN - DIANA - COMPUTER
EXPERT - GOOGLE - SEARCH
I - WAS - SUPPOSED - 2 B - DOING - SOMETHING
COMPLICATED - SO - HER - SMARTPHONE - AND
THE - COMPUTER - EXPRESS - WORKING - YES
TOGETHER - SO - BLK - PERSON - WOMAN SAID
SHE - WON’T - USE - HER - SMARTPHONE
AND - I - SAID - I - CAN - ONLY - TRY
SO - WENT - 2 - BLK - FEMALE - PERVERT
ALWAYS - BRALESS - CAN - WE - MAKE IT
ENGLISH - SHE - SAID - AS - HOMELESS
HER - FATHER - SENT - HER - SMARTPHONE
AS - FRENCH - IT - CAN’T - B - CHANGED SO
STUPID - BOTHERING - ME - ALL - THE TIME
SHE - DIDN’T - WANT - ME - HOMELESS
BUT - SHE - IS - AND - WHAT - KIND - OF
FATHER - THAT - SHE - IS - HOMELESS
FR - AMALFI - COAST
SHE - WAS - ALWAYS - PRETENDING - SHE
UNDERSTOOD - ME - BUT - SHE - DOESN’T
I - HATE - THOSE - PEOPLE
SO - WENT - 2 - WHO - I - TALK - 2 - ALL THE
TIME - HE - JUST - GOT - HIS - PHONE - BUT
HE - WAITED - 1 MONTH - 4 - TEL - NO
SETTINGS
ABOUT - PHONE
THERE - HIS - TEL - NO
SO - I - ADDED - FROM - READING - THE
CAPITAL ONE - APP
MUCH - BETTER - ON - HIS - PHONE
JUST - PUT - MY - CAPITAL - ONE
CREDIT - CARD - UNDER - HIS PHONE
2 - ENTER - MY - ACCOUNT
IN - MY - STORAGE - UNIT
I - SAID - I - HAVE - 2 WAIT - 2 WEEKS
4 - NEW - CHECKS - 50 - FREE - THEN
I - GIVE - LOCKSMITH - A - CHECK
$150
THEN - MY - STORAGE - UNIT - OPEN
THEN - MY - STUFF
SO - YOU - KNOW - I’LL - TRY - THIS
QR - CODE - CHOSE - 2
THEN - CHOSE - QR - CODE - AND
BAR - CODE - AND - THAT’s WHAT
WE - USE - THE - VERY VERY YES
BEST - JESUS - IS - LORD
GOT - INTO - MY - ACCOUNT THEN
CHANGED - MY - CASH - BACK 
COINS - INTO - REIMBURSE THEN
I - CLICKED - CHECKING - SAW
ACTIVATE - CARD - AND - ALL I
NEEDED - WAS - 2 - PUT
EXPIRATION - DATE
4 NOS - NOW - ACTIVATED
NO - ONE - NOT - EVEN - BY - TEL
TOLD - ME - THIS - IT - HAS - $$$$
AND - SOON - $943 - AND - THEY
TOLD - ME - I - CAN’T - SPEND IT
THEY’RE - JUST - THE - NOS ME
CAN - JUST - LOOK - AT - ALL MY
BILLS - NOT - PAID
AMAZON - PRIME
NO - CHECKING - ONLY - FOR
MAGAZINE - SUBSCRIPTIONS
WALMART - $35 - PLUS - FREE
SHIP - CHANGED - FR - SUNDAY 
2 - MONDAY - THE - PAYPAL DID
NOT - GO - THRU - AND - THAT
IS - WHY - I - GO - 2 - AMAZON
WALMART - IS - JUST - NOT - 2
ADVANCED - SO - GLAD - DID
NOT - HAPPENED
OF - COURSE - MY - DMV - YES
PORTABLE - 2 - CHANGE - MAIN
RESIDENTIAL - ADDRESS
YOU - NEED - 2 - CLICK
ID - CARD
REVISE - THE - ADDRESS - FR
MEMORY - YOU - NEED 2 BUY
FEE - $25
NEW - ADDRESS
SERVICE - $2
TOTAL - $27 - SAME - PRETTY
PHOTO - LONG - AGO - THUS
WHEN - I’M ACCEPTED IT WILL
GO - DIRECTLY - 2 - MY - COOL
MAILBOX - I - THINK - JESSICA
GOT THAT - PERSON EVICTED
AS PROPERTY - MANAGEMENT
SO - UNTIL - I - GET - EMAIL
THEN - MY - ORDER - IS IN THE
CART - THUS - I - REMOVED - 1
BOGUS - QR CODE - AND - YOU
NOW - HAVE - A - GOD - GOOD
QR CODE - AND - BAR - CODE
FREE - SCANNER - YOU NEED
THAT - AND - FREE EACH USE
LIKE - SAMSUNG - I - PUT - TO
THE - R SIDE - PER - APP AND
CLICK - UNINSTALL - JUST LIKE
MY - $1,999.99 - ADD - TAX - YES
SAMSUNG - GALAXY - OLD - S
SERIES - OVER 5 YEARS - YES
SMARTPHONE - BECAUSE
JUST - FILLING - UP - $$$$
NOW - CAN - EAT - AT - WHOLE
FOODS - MARKET - NOW I EAT
REGISTERED AT - AMAZON PRIME
REGISTERED - AT - PAYPAL - YEAH
CITIBANK - HAS - EARLY - PAYDAY
2 DAYS - EARLY - ALSO
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dontloseyourpants · 3 years ago
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Stripped on Stage
A commission I received from @gaystripstories! You can also find him on Twitter here. And you can support him by buying his stories on Amazon here.
I'll out the actual story below the cut. It's about a cocky young Broadway bound hunk who has an embarrassing incident on stage during his big debut. Hope you all enjoy it as much as I did!
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Before the Show: 
Hey, just wanted to stop by and wish everyone a great show! 
A sea of blank faces stared up at him, but he kept plodding on to get the reaction that he  desired. Walking further into the crowded dressing room, he finally stopped right behind me. 
I miss the camaraderie of being packed down here with everyone… it’s so lonely having  that dressing room upstairs all to myself. I usually just spend time before shows lying on my  couch until first call. 
Looking up, I saw his face forcing itself into what he thought was a genuine smile. For  someone who was apparently a much better actor than our poor little show deserved, he really  had such a hard time hiding his true emotions. 
Roger Stilton had quickly made a name for himself on Broadway. A Julliard grad just  like his rich father, he headed straight to Broadway and began booking any role he wanted. With  leading man good looks, his slicked back dark hair, and a jawline that could cut steel, Roger  actually could have earned his roles without daddy’s donations. 
As I continued looking up at him, I realized two things. First, his blush was much too  heavy for a theater as small as this one. 
Roger, sit down- let me help you out a bit. Quickly standing up in my boxers and  undershirt, I let him plop into my chair before wiping a makeup wipe across that beautiful face.  Here’s a tip when you’re not sure how strong to make your blush- you have to see what it should  be naturally and then add two swipes. 
Quickly taking hold of the bottom of his t-shirt, I ripped it over his head to expose that  chest to the whole room. His perky pecs and six pack abs were to die over, but for some reason,  even with all of that narcissism, he didn’t like showing off his body. 
See- that’s the color you want. 
I saw his eyes connect with his reflection to see the blush covering his cheeks, and I  added a bit of my powder onto his face to match. Grabbing his shirt, he just awkwardly held it in  front of him before walking back out of the room with his parting words flung over his shoulder. 
Well, let me let you get back to getting ready… I just love having a great ensemble behind  me on stage. 
I wanted to hate him, but I couldn’t. At least not for another week. He’d joined our show  after workshops, and even if I wouldn’t admit it, he was the reason we’d gotten our residency at  our off-Broadway theater. He was already booked for his next role in a few weeks in one of the  larger theaters, but if I had anything to do with it, I wanted to put his name in the news for  another reason. It was time to confirm the second thing that I realized once Roger walked in  here. 
Listen up. Every head turned back towards me this time, but unlike Roger, I could tell  that they wanted to hear what I had to say. I had a couple of decades on all of the younger actors 
around me, and they looked up to me since I’d give them actual advice. We’re a go for tonight.  Raise a hand if you’re in. 
Smiling to myself as I saw every hand quickly raise into the air, I knew that this would be  one show that Roger or the critics in the audience would never forget. I don’t know if Roger  knew that we’d picked up on it, but there was a lot of info that he gave away. He was using us as  a launch pad for some serious acting cred, and we were using him just as much. And for weeks  of workshops and performances, we existed together, but the last month had been different. He’d  starters treating us as disposable ensemble members even if the small cast all had named roles.  So, tonight, on the most important night of his run, we decided to get back at him. Looking up at  the timer on the ceiling above us, I realized that it was almost time for our first phase of the plan. 
Act 1: 
Look at him- if he wasn’t such a huge ass, he could really be the next big thing. Sorry- all I heard you say was huge ass, and I got distracted. 
Playfully slapping Sam on the arm, I kept watching Roger act as we waited for our cue.  Our show was a new take on the classic murder mystery, and each night, Roger dramatically died  on stage. The twist, the reason that we’d made it out of workshops, was that a new killer was  chosen each show. The audience could return night after night and still get a new experience  since we improved a lot and only kept core scenes consistent.  
This was one scene that was always the same, so Roger felt confident enough to ham it up as he looked at the two women in Row 2: The New Yorker and New York Times. They of  course had names, but Roger only knew them as the critics that he needed to impress. And he  truly was acting his ass off… and that was quite a challenge. Those dark gray slacks were barely  
stretched over that ample peach of a bottom, and I was reminded again that I was happy with the  game plan. And as he placed his glass of water back on the table, it was time for round 1.  
Natasha and Joslyn entered from stage left as Sam and I appeared from stage right, and in  a flurry of motion, we began bombarding him with questions.  
Sir, would you like the dinner menu? 
Please. 
Sir, would you like a wine list? 
That’d be delightful. 
Sir, would you like your water glass to be topped off? 
Certainly. 
Bending down, I poured the contents of my pitcher into his glass and across his chest. Oh monsieur, I am so sorry- let’s get you out of those wet clothes immediately. 
Patting him down with the hand towel, Sam walked behind him and began unbuttoning  Roger’s shirt. In utter shock, Roger just sat there staring at the pitcher that I’d laid down in front  of him- the one that looked completely normal. In every other show, a special prop had been  used that only held half a cup of water, but tonight, it looked like I’d grabbed the wrong pitcher  from the props table accidentally.  
There we go- we’ll have this dried and steamed before you even get the dessert menu…  not that it looks like you eat dessert often.  
He tried to cover his exposed chest as we left stage, but the tiny menu couldn’t cover  much. If he pulled it down, he exposed his perky pecs with his dark brown nipples shining under  the harsh lights, and if he pulled it up, you could see the happy trail disappearing into his pants.  As we all stood offstage in one giggling group, we watched the switch flip over in his head. He 
had just made the choice- he could either be embarrassed about being half naked on stage, or he  could continue acting so that the critics would write about how he powered through adverse  conditions. And he chose the second option… at least for now.
Act 2: 
After improving some line about remembering that he had a spare suit in his car, he  quickly walked off stage with his muscular back facing the audience. Once he disappeared into  the curtain, he began quietly yelling for the prop master, but he was nowhere to be found. Also  gone was the random rack of clothes that had been hiding in the wings for decades, so as he  rushed around, Roger only had time to grab someone’s suit coat and walk back on stage. 
Darling! Is it my birthday already? I thought I wouldn’t get my present until tomorrow. 
With her quick change successfully completed unlike her costar, Natasha was in a skin  tight dress and now playing Roger’s girlfriend. Walking circles around him, she began to  massage his tense body, and it seemed to be having an undesired effect on his lower half.  
Can I unwrap my present early?  
I’m so sorry love, but the weirdest thing happened at dinner earlier. I had time to grab a  spot of food before coming here, and then…  
As he began to sit down, the small blazer completely ripped down the middle, and the  ruined fabric fell in two pieces down each arm. Natasha was really hamming it up now as she  jumped up from the prop bed to kneel in front of her blushing boyfriend.  
I was joking before, but what else is about to come off? Did you somehow trade outfits  with a stripper? 
That time in the gym must have really filled out my shoulders.  
Then flex for me, Romeo. Let me see that body that’s all mine.  
Doing as told, Roger stood up and began to flex his muscles as he faced the audience. His  tanned chest seemed to glow under the lights, and I heard the audience getting into it more now.  If there were any repeat customers here, then they knew what normally happened here. Natasha  would have her birthday party, and in the commotion, Roger would meet his demise. But that  always happened fully clothed. 
Roger’s biceps were glistening in sweat, and his trimmed chest hair was as well. He was  breathtakingly gorgeous, and if only he wasn’t so cocky, we would have all adored him. As I saw  that blush spread further across those beautiful cheekbones, I wondered if there was something  more human under there. Just maybe… 
Oh, I just can’t resist anymore- come ravish me!  
With strength that I didn’t know she had, Natasha pulled Roger towards her as they fell  into the throes of passion on top of that bed. The audience was losing it as Natasha’s legs  comically kicked into the air before wrapping around Roger’s ample ass. She was kissing him all  over as Roger tried to break free for his cue. 
Oh honey, that special suit jacket wasn’t the only birthday surprise that I had planned. In  fact…
And this is where everything went so, so right. Roger lunged into a standing position  without even feeling Natasha’s fingers hook into the two small holes that had come undone on  each side of his tearaway pants. I don’t know how he hadn’t noticed earlier that we’d swapped them out before the show, but they’d stayed together right until they were needed.  
In comical slow motion, the back half of his pants fell to the floor as the front stayed  gripped in her hands.  
You got me exactly what I wanted! 
As Natasha jumped to meet him, we all started streaming on stage, holding balloons and  shooting party streamers into the air. The only one that was still was Roger who was somehow so  very, very visible in the middle of all of this chaos. With his pants gone, he was now standing  there in only his shoes, his nylon socks held up with leather garters on those strong calves, and  an impossibly tiny pair of baby blue bikini briefs that were trying their hardest to stretch over his  large frame.  
We all took a cue from the audience and focused on Roger as he stood petrified on stage.  His hands hung limply at his side, too embarrassed to even move them to cover up his impressive  bulge and thick pubes that were showing over the stretched waistband. You could have heard a  pin drop in the eerie quiet before one camera flash went off from the audience followed by  several more. I saw our one underpaid usher try to stop the cameras, but it was too late.  
Finally urged into action as he saw how many photos of him would soon end up online,  Roger finally spun around to try to find his pants, his jacket- just anything to cover himself up  with. Seeing the bed sheet that had been flung into the floor, he reached to grab it, but I was too  quick and stepped onto it to keep him from getting it.  
Standing back up, he had rage in his eyes as he looked at me, and he had no idea that  even more photos were taken now of him. From the back, his tiny briefs had been wedged  between those glorious cheeks, and he was exposing almost every inch of skin that he could.  
It was you- you’re the one that did it! 
He was about five minutes early with that line, but Roger’s embarrassment had finally  taken over his need to impress the critics. That was usually what he said when he discovered who  the killer was right before falling to the ground, but now, he was saying it to me even though  Joslyn was the one who’d dropped the ‘poison’ into his pasta in the previous scene.  
What are you talking about? It’s me- your best friend! 
A best friend wouldn’t do this on the most important night of their life! 
Reaching forward, he grabbed onto my shirt and yanked it apart. Buttons went flying as  my own chest was exposed to the crowd. My mouth was trying to hard not to break into a smirk  behind my trimmed salt and pepper beard as I backed away from Roger. Following me back  under the lights, he just kept going. 
You’ve always been jealous of me- my career, my body, everything! Do you know how  hard I’ve fought for this? Do you?  
He truly believed the words that he was saying even though he’d never had to go to an  open casting call in a crowded building downtown. He’d never had to squeeze into a borrowed  pair of LaDucas and dance for hours just to be told that they’d gone in a different direction. Oh  no, Roger had never felt rejection like that which is what would make what happened next even  sweeter.  
He lunged at me, and we fell in a heap on the floor. The audience, even the return  viewers, probably had no idea that anything had gone wrong. Everything we’d done had been in  character, and only one thing would be able to prove to them that this show had gone off the  rails.  
Roger’s body was gyrating around on top of me, but he never landed a punch. He wasn’t  angry enough for that, but he was too flustered to even know what to do. He couldn’t handle this  humiliation, and he was just lashing out. And then, it all stopped. As we tussled, we both heard  the pop and froze. It could have been anything, but we both knew exactly what it was. 
The Final Bow: 
And the award goes to Roger Stilton! 
The cameras all swung towards him as he tried to duck down into his seat. This is not  how he wanted awards season to go. He had just lost the Best Actor award for his starring role in  Thoroughly Modern Millie, and he was about to go to the bar until he heard his name called  again. Looking up at the big screen, he saw the category that he didn’t even know that he was  nominated for- Best Quick Change.  
With the DramaDesk award in hand, the late-night talk show host who had no business  being here walked on stage. I was sitting on the side in the cheap seats, but I could still see  everything. The last time that I’d seen Roger was when I’d been lying shirtless beneath him. I  watched as he sat motionless in his chair, and he only got up once the screen started playing a  video from that night.  
He was kneeling on top of me, and as we wrestled, the tiny strap on the right side of his bikini briefs popped right off. With his ass aimed right towards the camera, his pendulous cock  fell into view between his legs, and he tried to cover himself unsuccessfully with his hands. As  he moved, the rest of his underwear fell apart and landed on my chest leaving him completely  
naked.  
Standing up, he kept spinning around, turning one way and then the other to hide his  embarrassment. His hands were clasped over his manhood which left that ass completely  exposed. His tight waist made his bubble butt even more impressive, and the untanned skin acted  as a beacon for everyone’s eyes and cameras. I’d watched this scene dozens of times from the  comfort of my own apartment, but as Roger walked on stage to confront the host, I realized that  he probably had tried to forget this ever happened.  
When Audra Macdonald won earlier, she serenaded us with a few bars. Roger, what do  you plan on showing off to this crowd? 
The crowd was going wild, but unlike that fateful night, the crowd was over five times  bigger and full of people that Roger wanted to impress. He tried to put on a fake laugh and grab  the award, but even from this far away, I could see how strong that blush was as the host kept  going.  
No seriously, I think we need you to show it off! What does everyone here think?  
I let my cheer join the crowd as we egged him on, but he still wasn’t budging. And then,  the host looked right at me, and I pinched myself to see if this was all a dream.  
Do we need your old costar to come help out? He knows his way around this stage since  he’s performed here a few times. Come on up! 
The spotlight hit me, and now it was my time to feel a little shy. I’d been a background  dancer here in a few awards show opening numbers, but I’d never been up there individually.  Would my big break come decades later than it should have? 
Stepping on stage, I saw Roger’s heart drop, and my nerves suddenly vanished. He let the  host turn him around, and I realized that he was petrified again.  
Make me change my mind, Roger. Why shouldn’t I expose you again for how you treated  us on that show? 
Tommy, please, don’t do it.  
I could have been nice and joked around with him as we walked offstage to pretend like  this was a planned bit. But, he messed up.  
Roger, you didn’t even learn the names of your costars. My name is David- Tommy  worked the sound board.  
And before he could react, I grabbed onto those tuxedo pants and yanked them to the  ground. The button ripped off easily, and they gave me no resistance before sliding down to his  ankles. He’d learned his lesson from earlier and was wearing a pair of black trunks, but I still had  a little bit of humiliation left to give him. I could and should have stopped there, but I didn’t.  Grabbing onto his waistband, I pulled his undies to the floor and stepped back to let him have the  spotlight all to himself like he desperately wanted.  
His half-naked body was projected onto the big screen again but in real time now. His  ample, untanned ass still jutted out from his athletic body, and as he tried to bend down and grab  his pants, it jiggled with every movement.  
Looking down into the audience, I somehow made eye contact with Jan, the critic that  Roger always referred to as The New Yorker sitting not too far from where I’d been seated. As  she began typing onto her phone, I realized that Roger would get that big headline after all.
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the-bjd-community-confess · 3 years ago
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More Divaz confos
Mod: Round two of these, previously: link. There’s some interesting customer reviews in this batch (5 and 8) which may be useful to readers.
1.Vic3mage "the secret bjdivaz vip group is just pictures of boxes coming in and going out". Yeah, between the bitching about d0llshe, asking people to post on doa for them, dunking on ex-customers, posting pics of random doll parts that they can't identify which doll they're supposed to go with, whining about how little money they make, whining when ppl e-mail them, whining. Yeah, other than that it's just boxes, and alpacas u can buy off amazon anyway lol.
~Anonymous
2.The butthurt users crying and guilttripping under every Divaz confession who have never been seen before elsewhere on this blog are extremely unsuspicious and unproblematic and definitely unconnected to Divaz and unbiased in every possible way
/s
~Anonymous
3.idk shit abt bjd1vas but v1cemage i can absolutely tell you the shit about ch0o is 100% accurate, fucker's got a long, long history of being an awful little man that stretches well beyond his involvement in the doll community. between the two i'd still trust bjd1vas over ch00 ch00 the fool any day!
~Anonymous
4.The Z3st and Div4s thing is really silly and both entities were being shady but did they really have to take the DZ waiting room down with them? :( He had even made a separate thread about it......
~Anonymous 
5. RE: BJD Divaz
I’ve been a customer of BJD Divaz since they first started, when it was only run by Chart3rline. I even contacted other BJD companies trying to persuade them to work with Divaz as their US representative. Most declined because they didnt like D's commission fee, but I was able to persuade a few of them.
I asked them to purchase a doll off DOA because I couldnt afford the asking price, and while they did, I found out later that instead of agreeing to purchase the seller's price, they negotiated the price to be lower. This significantly cheaper price was not passed down to me. I paid the full price +the commission fee based on that full price. I am disappointed I was not told this. This is when I stopped viewing them as a "friend" and instead, as a business. I dont hold this against them, it’s context to what Im going to say later.
I’ve stopped purchasing from D after my recent order from them. This company usually takes 3 or less months to make a doll. I’ve ordered the doll from D and it took 11 months. They let me know it arrived to them in March and that it will be shipped soon, except it only shipped on July, and only after I sent them several "reminder" emails. Before people in the comments try to put the blame on me for not sending a reminder soon, please keep in mind that I acknowledged the email in March and confirmed everything and they keep stressing to not send them emails because they are busy, I’ve emailed once every month since. I’ve since switched to ACBJD and Ive been happy with communication and the dolls ordered. I imagine ACBJD gets the same amount of emails, but they dont berate their customers if they email more than once.
I regret when people wanted a D0llshe, but not deal with him, I always recommended D. I would warn people of ordering directly and instead go through D. They assured buyers they would be handling communication and all the efforts so they wouldnt worry, except they didn’t. A person that I’ve recommended D to, who surpassed 2 years, keeps messaging me for help because D wouldnt reply to their emails. She is respectful, sweet and a timid person, not a Karen. This person, emailed D without a reply so would email a week later, only to be told that their email would be pushed down to the bottom if emailed again. No response, so she goes to FB and IG, who both tell her to email because they arent the person running orders. Finally got a response that they would get their refund, after D0llshe sends D's payment, but minus the PP fees. 3 months later and theres no refund, only a promise of them getting it later. Why is the customer missing out on fees when they have no doll? Customer emails d0llshe and he says he cant offer refund, because they didn’t order through them, which is understandable, but when all options are out for a customer, do you blame them for chargebacks?
If anyone files a chargeback, D will be blacklisting them from every company they rep, as in blacklisting you from buying direct from those companies. I urge everyone who has negative experiences with D to email the companies they rep instead of venting on confession blogs, and writing your experiences on social media. Make it count and send letters to the companies they represent, and please provide proof because they will try to make you out to be a liar.
Speaking of, they made vague posts on cl0ver singing for charging paypal fees, and that they offer guarantees as an official dealer, except when offering refunds, to non delivered products I might add, they are keeping the fees, and offered no help with d0llshe, even before they ended their dealership with them. Someone on DOA was told to not email them unless the wait time surpassed 1.5 years. They are even so petty that they post screenshots with the full name and address (dox) of the customer on purpose and then delete it out a day later as if they just realized their "mistake".
Before you try to make excuses for them about the fires, keep in mind, I am dealing with a business. The lower price negotiation with the DOA sale, I am in no way obligated to give them a pass or treat them as a friend when they made it clear that our relationship is strictly business. Their issues, are not my issues. D0lk got dragged for not shipping in time, others, including artisans, got dragged for being so late with communication and sending back refunds for cancelled orders. Why does D get to be exempt?
The supporters are the worst part of this, because of instead of being honest so D can improve, they support them for being "real". For example, look how micemage words it, to make it seem like this criticism is from one person, when there are people on addicts who didn’t have good experience. Check the bjd dealers tag here, you will see the supporters in the comments going off on any and all criticism of D. Some have sane comments, but the majority are cult like and try to identify the person venting as if it’s one person. Addicts deletes threads with criticism asking people to instead direct it to their feedback group; which lets be honest, no one is going to do because its "not that bad", and most dont want to join a new group, which is mostly dead.
This is my first and last confession on D, I’ve emailed each company they rep and told them my experience as well as contacting the 3 month wait company, with screenshots of my order, how they handled it, and the excuse they used to put blame on the company for being so late (package arrived march to D, 4 months to be shipped is on D, not the company). I’m not using company or order details because I know they are petty enough to try to identify me and publicly shame me like they have to others. This and the threat of suing is why not many people like to go public with their experience. They just keep feedback neutral, move on and never deal with again.
~Anonymous
6. Listen, I can't take you seriously in regards to BJD!vas because you're posting on a confession blog. If you were serious, you would have posted in buyer beware groups, DoA reviews or the board to get things resolved, or you would have made a complaint to the BBB. And your language makes you come off more as someone with an agenda rather than someone who is trying to warn people. If shipping is the issue, stop buying with standard shipping and pay the extra price for express shipping. I saw one of you complain that it sat with them for 20 days; that's probably because you're not the only one and they more than likely have a queue to check and then ship out. Do mistakes happen? Yes, because we're human. I've been in this hobby for a few years now and it seems like most people know you're going to have to wait, sometimes even outside the expected wait time. And shipping something as big as a doll is a timely endeavor. I shouldn't have to say that.
My point is simply to stop complaining on an confession board and either take it to the places previously mentioned. Posting here behind the anonymous mask makes you sound like a petulant child who didn't get their way right away.
~Anonymous
7.My only issue with BJD Divaz is how I never get any updates. Every email, they tell me to join their facebook page for status updates. I dont have a FB and I dont want to create one. I bought my doll through their website, updates should be posted on their website, or they could send me an email. That isnt asking much.
~Anonymous
8. Since there seems to be a lot of either "completely negative everything sucks" or "everything was sunshine and rainbows" confessions about bjd!vaz I thought I'd chime in with a neutral review.
PROS
-They were always polite and professional in their emails, and gave me very detailed answers to my questions.
-I got exactly what I ordered, so no mix ups or missing parts or anything like that.
-I think them being forthcoming about personal issues (only one person on staff, illness, the flooding isue etc.) on social media is good, since it keeps customers updated as to why there might be delays.
-If you live in the US their shipping is very reasonable.
CONS
-Reply times were varied. Sometimes it could take over a week, sometimes a couple hours.
-My order took about 10mo which, when comparing to other people who ordered through the same company around the same time, was about 3x as long as if I bought it direct and 2x as long if I had gone through a different dealer. I get some of the waiting time is out of their control, but it was kind of ridiculous.
-They dont necessarily ship the same day they send you a tracking number. I wish they said something like, "Here's your tracking number, our pickup is Xday so it should start moving after that" just so I could be aware.
All in all no major complaints. I got my doll and all that. Their lone employee is clearly overwhelmed. I hope they hire another person, if only to give the one a break.
Truthfully, I most likely won't buy through them again. I'd rather pay the international shipping and go direct, than deal with the extensive wait time. I'd still recommend them to someone looking for a very long layaway, though. I paid in full, but if I had a 12mo layaway I would've never known they weren't ready to ship my doll until month 10.
~Anonymous
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castielslostwings · 3 years ago
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Hi robin! I started following jus on KoFi and noticed they had a link to your works fire and ice, deserted, and wild as real life books and they told me to reach out to you for the links. are you still offering those for order? Thank you💕
I’ve probably read through your entire ao3 work list and I love your writing style. I dont usually follow works in progress but couldn’t resist better than revenge. It’s so good! Love a little fluff omegaverse mafia
i thought i would answer this publicly since a lot of people are still asking! First of all, thank you sooo much for your kind words, and I'm so happy you're liking BTR!! <3 Another update will be there soon, I'm just working on a few other projects right now :-D
So--this is going to be a long-winded answer, and I'll start at the beginning. Basically, when I first put the books up, I kept the link private and had people DM me for access. I also made it clear over and over that they were set to at-cost and I was not making a profit. I also ran a whole-ass charity raffle that raised $600 for Random Acts and spent a bunch of my own money buying and mailing the raffle prizes.
If someone DMed to request the link who had no followers or was brand new, I even asked for references to try and assure they were well-intentioned. Seems excessive (I know many thought it was), but there's history in the Destiel fandom of OUR OWN (and even well-known fellow authors *cough*) leading takedown and hate campaigns (including lies and slander) over profitless printed fic.
Either way, consider that even WITH these precautions in place, the links were reported and my account got bombed. Yes, someone DMed me, pretended to be my friend, talked to me, and manipulated my feelings just to report the links. Love this fandom!
Fortunately, there weren't any consequences for me, and not wanting those haters to win, I made a new acct and put them all back up, but obviously, giving out the link isn't an option. I was doing individual orders for a bit (I created a quote, sent a SS, the person paypaled me, I put the order thru), but there was so much interest that i wound up spending several hours a DAY coordinating and submitting each individual order, often times for people who were...less than patient about it. Again, for no profit. I just couldn't keep it up.
I wish there was a safe way for me to distribute the link again, but I don't want my new account deleted, and clearly, these no-life-having losers can't just scroll by. I also am not going to do the thing where I provide access to the PDFs for people to upload themselves, as a google drive can just as easily be reported, and I'm not risking my entire Drive. I'm also not comfortable with sharing the HD cover artwork done by artists who are not me in a PDF that people could do any number of things with.
I'm thinking on it. The interest is still really high, so idk. Maybe i'll add a handling fee for my time, lmao. That would probably scare most people off, anyway. I guess if that's something anyone who still wants one would be OK with, my DMs are open.
Maybe I'll just CTRL+F the names and put them up on Amazon as original. Report that, bitches.
Just really sucks that crappy people get off on ruining things for everyone. Sorry to anyone who this affected :(
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prepperjournal · 4 years ago
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Building Your Survival Food Pantry
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When I was a child, we had a bomb shelter. My parents didn’t build it – it was there when they bought the house. But they did stock it with what they believed to be the most important survival items, should we ever get “hit.” I remember several battery-operated items – radio, flashlights, and such – and of course, clothing and bedding in a trunk. But then there were the food and drink items - our survival food pantry. There were all sorts of canned goods, of course, and large bottles of water (only glass in those days). Foods that normally came in boxes (e.g., cereal and powdered milk) were put into glass jars. Times have changed. Now that we have plastic and bagged items with long shelf lives, bomb shelter food would look very different today (except for the powdered milk, I suppose, which I always hated). And there are plenty of ways to keep food items water-proof. A nuclear event is not the only disaster for which we need to be prepared these days. Earthquakes, fires, floods, hurricanes, and tornadoes are all on the rise, as well as real threats from people both within and outside our country. Then there are blizzards, pandemics, and long-term power outages as we recently saw in Texas. And the Boy Scout motto of “Be Prepared” should still guide our preparedness. So, let’s take a look at what a survival food pantry should look like today. Whether we face a short-term or long-term disaster, it is best to plan for a long-term food and water shortage at the onset. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9J31WXxAEwY Survival Food Pantry Basics – The List - Water: It’s the “rules of threes” here. You can survive three minutes without oxygen, 3 days without water, and three months without food. If you are breathing, then water is the next priority. If you are planning a pantry for “bug-in” survival, you will want between ½ - 1 gallon of water per day, per person. This also presupposes that, if you have a means of cooking, you may use some water. And there is personal hygiene to think of too. In short, water must be your top priority. If the public water supply is disrupted, then any tap water will have to be purified once that supply is restored. A few drops of household bleach per gallon will do the trick and save you from the necessity of boiling if your power is out. If you are thinking in terms of a “bug-out” survival, water will be too heavy to carry. What you want instead is a water collection device and filters. And, if you have access to wood and bring matches, boiling water is always an option here. FIFO Can Tracker | Stores 54 cans | Rotates First in First Out | Canned Goods Organizer for Cupboard, Pantry and Cabinet | Food Storage | Organize Your Kitchen | Made in USA - Organize Your Food Pantry - Our patent designed FIFO Can Tracker keeps your kitchen organized by storing and rotating your canned goods on a First In First Out model saving you from expired food cost and waste! Designed to store cans from 4 to 15 ounces. Perfect for diced chili cans, soup cans or standard vegetable cans. Holds up to 54 cans. Perfect to organize your food storage. - Sturdy Design - Made in the USA, this product is built to last and will be a permanent solution to your kitchen organization problem. Easily connect multiple units together to expand your storage. - Easy Installation - Put together in just minutes following a simple 4 step process. - Fits on Existing Shelves - Product dimensions are 12" H x 16" W x 16" D allowing you to organize your pantry, cabinet and cupboard. - 100% Customer Satisfaction Guarantee - If you are not satisfied with your purchase and feel this product has not solved your pantry organization problem simply return for a full refund. $38.99 Buy on Amazon - Canned Goods: These are absolute staples if you are sheltered in place in your home. And they will provide a variety of foods so that you don’t face “food boredom.” Think in terms of canned meats, beans (a great source of protein), fish, fruits, and veggies. Variety is the key here so that you and your family members have choices. And these can be eaten without cooking. After all, your instant pot may not be an option right now. Canned soups are a great option if you buy those that are not concentrated. They can be eaten right out of the can without the need for water or cooking. Ensure you have a good rotation plan also. - Food in Jars: Here’s where the advent of plastic comes in. There’s a huge list of food and drink that now comes in plastic jars that prevent breakage and are less in weight. Think peanut butter and jelly; think bottled juices; think fruits. They, too, have long shelf lives and can provide a good variety. - Snacks: Snacks can provide a bit of a respite from the boredom that comes from lack of electricity and Wi-Fi. Crackers and chips come boxed and bagged. If humidity is an issue, then it can be stored in plastic bags. They have a long shelf-life and will not have to be “changed out” too often.  Dips are obviously out to “dress up” these items, but there are freeze-dried meats that will do, as well as peanut butter. If you can’t cook popcorn is out, but nuts are not. Stock up on a good variety. - Dried Foods: These were not around when I was a kid, but just go through any grocery store and look at all the possibilities. There are dried fruits and meats galore – everything from jerkies to fruit leather, to banana chips. Stock up on plenty of these – lightweight and nutritious. - Granola Bars: I put these in a separate category because they are a source of almost every nutrient we need – protein, carbs, a bit of fat, and even that need for something sweet. If you should have to “bug out,” they are lightweight, have a long shelf life, and can provide the energy you will need. Look for those that are high in protein – this provides long-term energy, while carbs and sugars are only for the short-term. - About that Powdered Milk: Fortunately, powdered milk now comes in cans, as opposed to those traditional boxes. You do not have to take measures to protect it from water damage. When reconstituted with water, it can be used on cereal and for cooking (e.g., mashed potatoes) if you have an alternative cooking method during power outages. If you have children who cannot tolerate the taste, then have a supply of canned chocolate or strawberry syrup to “sweeten the deal.” - Pasta, Rice, Noodles: These can be temporarily filling because of their carb content. But here’s the thing: they must be cooked, and that will require using your supply of water. If you are sheltered in place with your public water supply still available, then all is good. You can cook these up as much as you wish. But if your water supply is cut off, or you have to use alternative methods for cooking, these are probably not good options. Still, put them in your pantry on the chance that they can be prepared. - The Debate About Couscous: Yes, this is a type of pasta, made from small grains of a specific type of wheat flour. The beauty of it is that it is steamed rather than boiled and takes far less water to cook. Unlike traditional pasta, couscous cooks in about two minutes. On the other hand, it is extremely high in gluten. So, if you have family members with gluten sensitivity, it is not an option. Planning for Long-Term Survival in Place As mentioned above, your food pantry should be planned for long-term survival, even if an immediate event is only short-term. Our goal for long-term survival in place is to have those food items that: - Provide solid nutrition - Can be prepared using as little fuel and water as possible - Will be “damage-proof” - Are as compact as possible - Have a variety of flavors and consistencies, so that “food boredom” doesn’t set in Here are some things to think about as you stock that survival food pantry: - Avoid dried beans. While they are a great source of protein, they take lots of water and fuel to cook. Items like navy beans and great northern beans now come in cans. Opt for that alternative. - Water is still the highest priority. Have ½ - 1 gallon per person per day for about a month. Beyond that, you will need a water-collection device/process and water filters to purify that water. - Rely on canned goods as much as possible, but remember they have lots of sodium and sugar, so are not as healthy as other options. - Freeze-dried fruits and veggies are a must. They don’t take up much space, and they are sources of essential nutrients and antioxidants. They are also important to keep your intestinal functions operating properly. You will get the right amounts of vitamins and minerals through these freeze-dried items. - Honey has no shelf-life. It can last forever. Have lots of it to use as a sweetener, and it does come in plastic containers. - Instant oatmeal packets. Place these in plastic bags to preen water damage. They are reconstituted with a small amount of water and heat. Use honey for sweeteners. While sugar lasts forever too, it does not have the health benefits of honey and is susceptible to humidity. - A variety of oils can add “spice” and flavor to foods. And most come in plastic containers now. If you can cook, use them liberally. They are caloric heavy and can provide energy as well as better taste. - Ramen: This is a common survival food for college students on tight budgets, but there are survival benefits too. They are good sources of carbs and take only a small amount of water to cook. - Freeze-dried and dried meats: these can last over a year. - Canned tuna in oil: perfect source of protein and Omega-3. - Granola and protein bars: Perfect for snacks and well-rounded nutrition. One Keynote here: make certain that all foods that are packaged in boxes or paper-type containers are stored in water-proof packaging, such as mylar bags that are vacuum-sealed. If You have to bug out When you have to evacuate, you face unique challenges. Of course, you cannot drag jugs of water and canned goods in backpacks. A wheeled cart is certainly a short-term solution, but it will not house everything you may need for a long-term bug-out situation. Your options are limited, so focus on these items: - A water collection device and filters - Survival Matches - Flashlights with new batteries or headlamps - Fully lightweight nutrition bars and other freeze-dried items You Can do This... Planning ahead is the best scenario for survival. Water and food are key factors in that planning. Make a list of items for both short and long-term survival, get to your grocery store and other retailers with the right supplies and equipment. You can be prepared for any disaster, and that brings a lot of peace of mind. Author’s bio. Jessica Fender is a professional writer and educational blogger. Jessica enjoys sharing her ideas to make writing and learning fun. You can check her last review here. Read the full article
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popculturebuffet · 4 years ago
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Life And Times of Scrooge McDuck Retrospective: The New Laird of Castle McDuck! “And I’ll Remember It Poppa! There’s Always Another Rainbow!”
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Hello all you happy people! And welcome back to my look at the Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck! And to make up for lost time im’ doing two instalments this month, and with luck and my schedule holding out I plan to finish the main series in September, doubling up again for the last two months to finish this up. 
Background wise there’s honestly not a lot this go round, as it’s less rooted in history and more Don Rosa’s need to settle an annoying flaw with continuity. Man oh man do I relate to that and having read comics for at least half my life, i’ve seen writers do this by the bucketload to fix decisions from other writers. Sometimes for the write reasons and sometimes because EVERYTHING WAS BETTER ON MY EARTH. Don Rosa, like most writers.. has done both. 
Here though it’s for the good and for understandable reasons: Barks had Scrooge’s origin as a poor shoeshine boy from Glasgow.. but also had a rather famous and awesome story, the Old Castle’s Secret, that also gave them a giant ancestral castle. Rosa fixed this by having the McDuck’s having lost it due to a combination of being driven off the land by a fake ghost dog and poor turns of fourtune meaning they coudln’t pay the taxes to live there and were behind on taxes on it, hence the Whiskervilles having taken it over in part one. 
But obviously the Whiskervilles coudln’t KEEP the castle as Scrooge owned it in present day, thus this chapter explains how he got it. It was a stroke of genius plot wise too as it allowed him to open each act in Scotland and using the castle to measure where Scrooge is in life: As a boy dreaming of getting it back, as a young man who while not a success succeeds at this, and as an older hardned man who realizes he simply doesn’t belong here anymore who has to leave his family’s legacy here behind to start a better one in America. 
The only other real story is that a sequence here was based on the film A Matter of Life and Death, and Rosa detailed in his notes his quest to get a copy as the distribution rights here were a nightmare at the time. Thankfully that’s clearly changed as a quick look on Amazon shows both a standard DVD release, mentioned by rosa in the book and a snazzier release by the Criteron Collection are both easily available. He ended up getting a copy from Canada, and while he didn’t get any insight at least got a neat addition to his collection. Admittedly this dosen’t add much to the story, I just thought it was neat. So with all of that settled, join me after the cut as Scrooge tries to buy back his family’s legacy.
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And Scrooge has already arrived in Scotland, having reunited with Downy and Matilda, who as a refresher is more responsible and straightlaced here versus the 2017 incarnation.  Part of me DOES wish they hadn’t glossed over the reunion especially since this chapter is the last time we’ll see Scrooge and his Mom together before her utterly heartbreaking passing a few chapters down the road. But I get why we opened here instead: it’s a captivating open, with Scrooge speeding to the castle, his mother and sister trying to stave the rain off and time clearly of the essence. It sucks you in as we don’t know WHY Scrooge was summoned last time, only that it was bad enough he needed to come home, and thus ratchet’s up the tension until we find out shortly. 
It turns out the back taxes on Castle McDuck are up and the castle is being sold., doing so with some glasses, foreshadowing his iconic specs wearing as the snow and brightness of the praries in various seasons mean his eyes are all done fucked up like mine.  The Whiskervilles are naturally not only the prospective buyer but already trying to take the property prematurely, with Fergus and Jake holding the line, because love isn’t always on time. But Hortense is and when the Whiskervilles mock her daddy and uncle, planning to tear down the castle out of spite, her response reminds us why donald is a ball of rage and badassery...
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Have I mentioned she’s my favorite part of this story? Because she is. Her response to scrooge being back is also just pure adorable. 
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Scrooge does get a big reunion with his dad and uncle, getting a big hug from Fergus, if squshing his cream cheese sandwitch... and yes that’s apparently a real thing. I mean I do love me some cream cheese don’t get me wrong, but it just feels weird to put it on bread as the only thing, but I guess i’m a bit spoiled with crackers and bagels in my day and age or putting it on tosat with salmon and.. saying all of this both makes me very hungry for cream cheese. So I guess i’ts not all bad it’s just weird to me, especially since I don’t think it’d keep all that well unregrigrated but I also don’t know the times that well. Or maybe when your that poor and hungry, it dosen’t matter how good it is and maybe i’m just spoiled by my upper middle class existance. I dunno. The point is i’m going to go get me some cream cheese be back in a minute. Here have some music. 
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For all two of you that didn’t clear out, Fergus naturally for the time, turns out to be sexist, insisting Jake get “The Women” home.
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Though Rosa gets a great joke out of it by having Jake wonder if he can even reign Hortense in. And I do love Hortense’s character. Whlie i’ts simple, she’s simply an angrier version of her son without the penchant for half-assed schemes, it works and makes her stand out against the more subdued rest of the McDuck family outside of Scrooge. 
Fergus explains HOW it got so bad to Scrooge: While the McDuck ancestors pooled resources to automatically pay the taxes, eventually only having two poor old men who could barely keep their family fed and a slightly less poor pulp fiction writer somewhere in America meant the taxes piled up and the Whiskervilles are within a whisker’s reach of gettng the castle, something mentioned in part 1. 
It also provides a great payoff to the first part of Scrooge’s journey: while the boy bemoans only having gotten the 10,000 dollar check from the mine sale, and that will only just about cover the castle’s taxes, he feels disheratned as it’s ALL he’s accomplished.. but in a nice moment from Fergus he points it WASN’T all for nothing: Thanks to his work they get their home back. His family can move from the cramped confines of Dismal Downs back to their ancestral homeland like they always deserved. While he may of not achieved his goal of being rich yet.. he still achieved his goal of buying the castle back, the very thing that set him on this path in the first place. It’s telling though that it takes a reminder of that, that Scrooge is loosing sight of the very human, for lack of a better term, reasons he set out: while he’s finally built a better life for his family, if just so.. all he can see is that he’s not RICH. The money is starting to cloud his judgement.. and i’tll roll over him entirely before the series is over. 
The Head of the Whiskervilles shows up with the Sheirff.. whose also a Whiskerville lest you thought unfair and crooked policing was a strictly american thing. But Fergus points out their too early.. and Scrooge flashes his check. And when the Head Whiskerville scoffs at a mcduck having money... Scrooge points out he didn’t believe in ghosts either and brags about his awesomeness in the first chapter, revealing what he did and leaving The SHierff pissed and the older whiskerville ready with a plan: he decide......
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Sadly not with children’s trading cards but with swords, and gets past the legality issue by simply challenging Scrooge’s pride and angering him into accepting. Argus, the head whiskerville whose name I just got from the comic, reveals his plan to the Shierff: While he’s dueling Scrooge Sheirff can snatch the bank statment.. though why Scrooge didn’t you know, cash it before coming and how an american banks tatment is valid in early 1900′s Scotland...
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So the Duel is on.. and like the money he’s made, the Duel is another Marker of how far Scrooge has come and how despite still not having made his fortune yet he’s rich with EXPERINCE. His experince fighting cattle rustlers and pirates means he has the reflexes to easily outfight his opponent.. though him saying he learned how to fight “Injun Style from Buffallo Bill”, i.e. learned how to fight like a native american from a white guy and beat Sitting Bull with it just makes me feel like i’m watching that episode of Saved by the Bell where Zach has to learn not to be racist but then thinks this outfit is acceptable. 
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Scrooge also tracks the guy using the tracking skills he learned from the blackfeet which again feel like the picture above , but send Argus running.. only to lure Scrooge into a fight on the castle battlemnt in the pooring rain and disarming him. Luckily the spirit of Sir Quackly gives the lad his sword back and Scrooge wins the fight.. but promptly gets hit by lighting while celebrating Caddyshack style. 
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No really Scrooge is.. or close as he got knocked into the water and is now in heaven. Sir Quackly naturally doesn’t want to see the last hope of the Clan McDuck dies and goes to talk to the tribunal of McDucks to sort it out hence the Matter of Life And Death connection. 
The Tribunal is made up of former McDucks.. it turns out Scrooge is here because of Quackly: the lighting was SUPPOSED to hit the tower, distracting Argus, and they prepare to write Scrooge off because their more concerned with golf than the fact that their whole clan’s future is on the line.. which I do not get because unless you are Tiger Woods or the Film Caddyshack, golf usually is the boring garbage water of sports and this is from someone who dosen’t like sports to begin with. I do like the Missing Links of Moorshire though so there’s that. And golf episodes of shows are usually good.. the sport itself is just incredibly boring. And I sat through Mank. I know boring. I know wanting hours of my life back. Golf is the Mank of Sports. 
What we get is a pretty tiresome sequence honestly: Quackly points out the tribuanls faults while their just dicks who only care about golf. Which again, Mank of sports. Or if you prefer the Cloud Atlas of sports but with SLIGHTLY less untetionall racisim and sadly much less Tom Hanks and Hugh Grant. The point is golf sucks and while I ilke the REST of this chapter this bit just dosen’t work for me and was clearly funnier in Rosa’s head, with the assholes not thinking much of Scrooge’s achievements and only liking him when they find out he’ll be a tight wad, the only funny joke in these draggy as hell three pages, not counting the start and finish of the sequence which arnet bad, as they send him back to earth with Quackly mentioning the dime, but not giving out WHY it’s important. That he has to figure out on his own and all that good stuff. 
So Scrooge uses his dime to unscrew the bolts and back at the castle while Argus TRIES to pawn it off as Scrooge being a coward and depart with the bank draft.... 
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Damnnnn that’s badass, he gets the bank note back (only knowing because one of his ancestors mentioned it, though with his memory of the dying dream gone he dosen’t know WHY), and has Fergus run into town to pay the taxes tonight before any other shenanigans happen while he keeps the two scheming dogmen captive long enough for Fergus to get too far for them to catch up.  Argus plans to go with plan “Do a murder on Scrooge”.. but fines Scrooge is far from unprotected and not the only badass in his family.. I mean Hortense exists but I mean that ther’es more than two... you know what jut look at the ghost heads. 
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So the two run for their lives..... also they forgot you know Hortense exists.. she’d revenge murder all of them and they both know it. 
So with the land safe and the taxes paid so the Family can implicitly move in, we end on a beautiful sunrise as Scrooge prepares to leave soon. Despite all the setbacks and hardship Scrooge is deterimend to still make it and knows he won’t fail forever. When Fergus mentions Gold at the end of a rainbow, Scrooge takes that, and the golden dawn as a sign. WHen Fergus understandably asks if he’s sure he’ll make it this time.. we get a nice nod to Bark’s best and most notable painting “always another rainbow to close us out”
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It’s a beauitful and inspiring statment.. no matter what you face.. there’s always a light at the end of it. Always another opportunity, another goal to reach, another hill to climb.. and life to live... and it’s one i’ve taken to heart and always will.. and one that will land Scrooge his fortune yet. 
Final Thoughts: This chapter is alright but like I said the two page sequence in heaven dosen’t really work for me. It’s just not funny enough and really shoudl’ve been trimmed down a page so we could get more character stuff with Scrooge and his family> Otherwise it’s a tightly paced thrilling chapter in Scrooge’s life, showing just how far he’s come and how far he has left to go. The DIsmal Downs chapter serve as a good marker of where Scrooge is and where he’s heading as I mentioned earlier, with this one showing that while he’s not hit his goal yet, he still got his family their true home back, beat his enmeis and is a legend to be. Ther’es always another rainbow.. and he just needs to find it. All in all a decent chapter outside those two pages, and a good setup for the next three glorious chapters. 
Next Month on LIfe and Times: One is Scroogey and the other is FLINTHEART GLOMGOLD, as Scrooge meets his arch enemy and rides a motherfucking lion. And if “rides a motherfucking lion” doesn’t make you come back I do not know why you read this.  Next Time On This BLog: What is that, that Freaky Thing? It’s A naked Mole rat as we return to Kauai this time with Kim Possible and Co as Drakken tries to capture stitch and Jumba wonders if Rufus is one of his or not. 
See you at the next rainbow
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bookaddict24-7 · 3 years ago
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BLOG TOUR POST!
Where the Rhythm Takes You by Sarah Dass 
Release Date: May 11th, 2021
Page Count: 352
Genre: Own-Voices Young Adult Contemporary Fiction, Romance, Retelling
Buy a copy: Indigo | Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Book Depository 
Add this book to your TBR on Goodreads here. 
Synopsis: 
“Seventeen-year-old Reyna has spent most of her life at her family’s gorgeous seaside resort in Tobago, the Plumeria. But what once seemed like paradise is starting to feel more like purgatory. It’s been two years since Reyna’s mother passed away, two years since Aiden – her childhood best friend, first kiss, first love, first everything – left the island to pursue his music dreams. Reyna’s friends are all planning their futures and heading abroad. Even Daddy seems to want to move on, leaving her to try to keep the Plumeria running. And that's when Aiden comes roaring back into her life – as a VIP guest at the resort. Aiden is now one-third of DJ Bacchanal – the latest, hottest music group on the scene. While Reyna has stayed exactly where he left her, Aiden has returned to Tobago with his Grammy-nominated band and two gorgeous LA socialites. And he may (or may not be) dating one of them… Inspired by Jane Austen's Persuasion, Where the Rhythm Takes You is a romantic, mesmerizing novel of first love and second chances.”
___
Review: 
Disclaimer: I received an ARC copy via Literary Bound Tours in exchange for an honest review!
I did a combination of a physical copy and the audiobook and I honestly really recommend doing this. It took me a second to get accustomed to the accent, but I felt like it added a level of authenticity and personality to the story that would otherwise be lost by just reading the book alone. This book held so many layers. You have the layer of our MC grieving over not just the loss of her mother, but the loss of her first boyfriend a few years before the events of this book. You have the complex relationship between her and her painting, her and her best friend, and her and the hotel her mother left behind. There were moments where I wish I could have been like her big sister and told her to just let go of some of these stresses because there are times where you're reminded of how young she truly is and how much her heart hurts. But beyond the grief, I loved watching her and the love interest slowly fall back into their old routine of loving one another. I loved seeing his moments of jealousy and when he too shows just how young he is. And as we're watching all of this go down, we're also surrounded by this beautiful setting that makes you wish you could go exploring it yourself. I loved the descriptions and I wanted to be right there with them, sitting under waterfalls and running on that sand. I do think I felt frustrated sometimes because I wanted to help the MC realize things a little quicker and with less anger, but that's my only complaint. I just had to keep reminding myself that she's young and she's finding her way. I'd recommend this one for fans of second chance romances, and those who want a tropical setting with endless possibilities. Also, highly recommend the audiobook!
___
Happy reading!
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assetsliterature · 3 years ago
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7 ways to earn money while you sleep
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: Creating money while you sleep. Whenever I get this in my mind, I always remember a quote from Warren buffet “if you don’t find a way to make money while you sleep, you will work until you die.”
First, let me tell you something. If you haven’t been heard this type of thing before, then believe these things:
Every way I share in this blog works.
Ways which can make money while you sleep are called: “Passive income.”
You cannot achieve multiple income sources just reading ``always remember “1 hour of doing > 5 hours of thinking.
Passive income :
Just imagine you wrote an ebook and publish it on Kindle, then people who are interested in your ebook will buy it, I know that selling a book on a huge level can be a hard task, but after doing this, you will make money while you sleep ;
This is just an example of ‘selling a digital product online.
~ Please scroll down if you don’t want intro~
Don’t let your area influence your mindset:
When I was living in my hostel, sometimes I used to to the terrace for stargazing at 3 a.m. with my best friend. One night he asked me to give my best advice to him because I haven’t got any advice for him in my mind.
But now I have one
:
You must have heard that- “the people you socialize with influence you so much.” That’s why you should be with people who have a positive mindset ~~
People around you affect your life in many ways. Let’s understand this with an example- “imagine you’re a student and your classmates don’t take their studies seriously, they only study one night before an exam, they bunk classes and waste so much time on not-so-good things.” Then there is a big chance that you can be like them too!
“Sociologists tell us the most introverted of people will influence 10,000 others in an average lifetime” every person you come in contact with is impacted in some way.
So, in my opinion, train yourself to not learn from negative minds. Stay with people you want to be. They will always lift you!
Remember: Just because someone is so confident at saying something doesn’t mean they are right!
How much you can earn:
Creating Passive income in your 20s is not something that everyone does, and for making your passive income source work good you have to put in some effort and time. You have to invest your money in it.
You can start with investing a little, and then you have to invest from your profit to make it work well.
So it depends on you; however, there are so many ways that have a huge income compared to another passive income source.
7 ways to create passive income for beginners :
1.Sell Digital Products:
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If you’re a newbie, then this can be a good start for you!
There are a lot of things to create and sell online! I.e., ebooks, online courses, podcasts, graphic art bundles, photographs, music, templates, and so much more.
If you like blogging, you can create podcasts, ebooks, online courses related to your niche. Visit this for more examples of digital products_ If you’re interested in photography, you can sell your pictures at reasonable prices. Just pick your interest and go for it! It is not effortless, but you can learn and earn a lot from this!
Requirements?
All you need to have is a phone, a good internet connection, an urge to learn, and a lot of patience.
How much can you earn?
If you choose to write an ebook and you list it on Kindle for 1$, and you get one buyer a day, then you can earn 30$/month easily; stock photos earn approximately 25–45 cents per image, it depends on how many people are buying from you. The prices of online courses are usually 8$. If 1 thousand students buy your course, then you can get 624$ from it!
The more you work, the more you’ll earn but make sure to be creative and unique and don’t forget- “quality over quantity.”
# Don’t give up too easily if you’re here to earn.
2.Start a blog:
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You may have heard that before, but it’s because it’s work. Even I was thinking about this so many times before starting this blog, and it’s good to have something on your bucket list to work on. When you are free, you can start a blog and give your six months in it.
Remember, it’s worth the hustle. Imagine if you started a blog one year ago. Do you believe you’re that useless that you can’t even get 50,000 views on a blog after working one year?
You can check this out if you’re interested in starting a blog.
Requirement:
I know a friend who is planning to start a blog. I asked him about his blueprint, and he said, “i will write and earn” he is stupid; I hope he is now seeing this right now, first learn about blogging in-depth and decide how much time you can give it, if you don’t have a plan then you will be lost for a moment, trust me I know that, been there.
These things are a must for starting a blog :
A niche
A map for both before posting an article and after posting an article
And expect the hard time will come, and if it will not, then it will.👁
How much you can earn:
Blogging is something a small blog can be a bug business after some time, many bloggers who just started blogging for a hobby leave their 9–5 from it,
It’s from google AdSense website;
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Google will pay you according to your niche, but if you create a finance blog and you get 50,000 visits per month, you can make 15,012$/year.
# for blogging, you should learn daily and use google sheets for planning. You can download the sheets template from here
3.Join the affiliate program and use Pinterest:
You can join the Amazon affiliate program by just signing up to their website. By doing that, you can share your link, and if someone buys a product from your link, you’ll get paid depending on the product category and price.
So there is a problem in that like who will buy products from your link, I know, so that’s why you will use Pinterest,
If you don’t know about Pinterest, you can download Pinterest from any app store and use it.
You can share pics with links on Pinterest, and it’s called creating pins. So people can see your shared photos on Pinterest, and if someone sees a product they like, they will click on the pic, and then they will redirect to amazon.
Requirements: you don’t even need a laptop for it, just 1 hour a day and a little bit of Pinterest SEO, and it’s the best thing I love about Pinterest; it has so easy SEO compared to google.
How much you can earn?: amazon affiliate earning has no limits; you can increase it as you grow anywhere online. Once you achieve your target on Pinterest, you will thank you for just starting.
4.Rent your apartment on Airbnb:
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Airbnb is a platform where someone can rent out their couch, room, or home.
Since hotel prices are so high in major cities, it’s been obvious that before booking hotels people check Airbnb.
If you have free space in Airbnb, you can try this out, and after some time, you can hire a cleaner and an assistant to manage everything.
Requirements: you have to live in a developed city, if you are like me then AirBnb is no use for you, but I will wait when my hometown has so many travelers all around the world XD!!
How much you can earn?: That depends on the level you are receiving orders from AirBnB, but for a try, you should register on it and try yourself how often you get a call !!
5.Write an ebook:
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If you love the idea of digital products, then you can choose to write an ebook. In that case, you don’t need any investment. You can check this out for more category ideas !!
For creating book covers or any graphic, use Canava. You can choose something related to your studies or interest. But do remember this ‘getting readers for your book is not easy. Everything is hard, so choose your hard.
Requirements: just an idea about your ebook, map of where you will share your ebook(like Facebook groups. Forums related to your book title etc.), and you have to know good writing and your target audience but don’t worry and don’t afraid of failure, you should give 30 days to write your ebook and see what you can do
How much can you earn?: As I mentioned earlier, it depends on your readers. If you get 80 readers at a 1$ price per month, you get 80$/month without doing anything. It’s just a starting future. You will get more readers if you write valuable content for your target audience.
#write an ebook like you are talking to your friend about something
6 .Dropshipping:
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Dropshipping is like selling products online, but you don’t store your product. You use a third-party supplier (like wholesaler or manufacturer) to fulfil product needs; I am sure you have heard Shopify’s name before from Shopify; you can create your dropshipping business; I highly recommend you check out Shopify website. If you use Shopify, don’t worry; no one will know if your eCommerce website is Shopify.
From here, you can learn how to start an eCommerce dropshipping store from scratch.
Requirements: A niche, a supply for your store, build your online store and then market your store after that to improve your store.
How much can you earn?: It’s just like a store but online, but it can be a lot more profitable than an offline store. You have to put a lot into it to succeed, so your earning cannot be defined by just typing and thinking !!
7. Create an app:
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I am not saying that it’s not risky, but you can create an app that solves people problems or help them with something like if you use android, then you might have some problems and wish that there was a solution for it _
Some time ago, I was searching for friends interested in fantasy books, so i wish that I had an app where I can just find them ~
So if you can solve the problem from your app, then try it.
However, you have to invest in it first because everyone is not an android/ios app developer.
Requirements: an idea, some money to hire a developer, and a plan
How much you can earn?: when you upload your app on any app store, and user use it, you earn money, so it depends on what’s your planets
Like you can sell the app to every user or add a subscription fee or monetize your app.
So it will worth it when it achieves its meaning!
_____
Thanks so much for reading this article, I will share more business strategy in-depth and if you really want to earn from passive income please accept my suggestion and plan something and go for it because i know a lot of people who learn and never take actions ~~
You can subscribe to us if you love this topic!
Assets- Literature
Original article: https://www.assetsliterature.com/2021/05/how-does-cryptocurrency-work.html
You can check our website for other contents like this.
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misszura · 4 years ago
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Where, besides Tumblr, can people find you doing fannish things? (Obviously only mention sites and usernames you actually want to be found at. Don’t expose your secret identities on my account.)
What other names have you gone by on these platforms, including Tumblr, if any?
When did you join the IT fandom? And what got you into fandom, to begin with?
What are your favorite ships, or characters, if any, and why? What do they mean to you?
In what ways do you participate in fandom? (ex. Posting memes, reblogging/commenting on content, writing fanfic, making fanart, creating fanmixes, etc.)
Do you have any in-fandom inspirations? Other members of the community that drive you? (And if you have the time/energy, in what ways do they inspire you?)
Name and link some of your favorite works, please!
Do you have any works of your own that you feel particularly proud of, or wish more people would’ve consumed? Please provide links if possible.
Have you ever participated in a fannish event (ie. IT Week, a fic Big Bang) or applied to be a part of a fanzine? If so, which ones, and can you please link them?
Without any form of bashing or lashing out, what is something you feel this fandom is missing?
(lmao sorry I accidentally unfollowed trying to get to the ask button)
OMG, it's 2am here, and I just received this notification, so instead of watching the celling, trying to find sleep, I'll answer your questions !
(I love asking ! Thank you so much ! )
Others social medias that's it ? I have plenty of them. You can find me on twitter (@ CrazyZura) but it's mostly in french (speaking English in front of a buch of french people is hard y'know ?) I have Instagram, but it's not really interesting (except if watching me make paper boats and leave them at my university is interesting) I think it's resophinement (I'll check before posting) I also have wattpad, but as before it's in french (feel free to have a look on my unfinished works (no It there)) still CrazyZura, but I have a second account where I project to post the fanfiction I'm currently writing ! (I'm almost done ! ) Oh and I have a tik tok account ! I draw a lot, and there is some IT content there certainly CrazyZura (as @ but I think my username us wawawa, because I used to cosplay a gebderbend Wario) (don't ask he is underrated XD)
I never changed my username on those platforms, because I'm kinda a newbe on Internet, i mean, I'm here from 2015 for most of them, before I was on... YouTube i think, and Facebook. I used to have a blog, and my username was something like sosodu44 (my name + from my department) (and I'm on Tumblr for 2/3 months, I still don't know how it works)
(please tell me i understood well the question, sorry if not, I still learning foreign languages)
I'm also a newbe on the IT fandom since I watched them (2017 and 2019 version) during the lockdown, and the 1990 miniseries not long after. I'm still looking for the book, but I can't find any book shop open (and I won't buy it with Amazon.) You laugh at me if I say that I saw those movies while watching the whole Finn Wolfhard filmography ? Because it's thanks to that I'm in the fandom
My favourite characters are Stan, Richie and Patrick, and my favourite ships are probably Stozier (don't hit me please) patrick X Richie, henpat and obviously Reddie (I mean, I think everyone in the fandom like Reddie, right ?) Why ? I kin (it's the term ? Let's say it's the term) Richie and Stan (more Richie, he is my Confort character ) and Patrick, because I have a thing with unsaine bad Guys, my family always make jokes about it. (I can't help, plus the fact that he is pictured by Owen teague improve my love for him) (funfact : patrick is my Confort drawing, when I don't know what draw, it end up by Patrick) (sometimes Vic comes, because i like his character a lot too)
I love this question, because it makes me feel like I'm really a part of something even if I don't do a lot. As said before I draw Patrick a lot, not only, I draw it characters a lot (I need to find where I put my last Bill drawing ) I also have a fanfiction, but I won't post it until it's finished, because I fear to not end it, and I don't want the pressure of people asking "when is the next chapter" (if people ask that) and I'm kinda anxious that if I start post it before I finish it, I'll never finish it... (But soon ! Like before July if I work hard !). And obviously I reblog memes, I share fanarts, cosplays, tik tok, videos, and fanfiction.
Ok so this is the "sophie is going to simp over everyone" time ! Fanfictions writers who inspires me are @ fuji09 (I didn't notify them on purpose, I have to stop bothering them) they're fanfictions are really cool, and there for every tastes, I wish I could have a writing skill as good as them. There is also my friend shayla_mitchel (on Wattpad) she writes a lot about Patrick and she Helps me a lot with my work (plus she is the one who correct the English version, since my translations aren't always the best) (by that I mean : it's sometimes, when the moon is in good therms with Neptune, good enough) (in my language it's fun. I swear) there are those Cosplayers on tik tok, mostly fezilius and Synthestron, moonshine4snails, tarondactyl and aphelion (they're cosplaying with their friends, if you have time watch they're works, even if they don't do only It contents, they're really good Cosplayers that I love) (i just noticed I've mentioned only male/nb Cosplayers, so I add cospla.natro (on Instagram and tik tok) and Ligeia.cosplay (on Instagram and tik tok too) and there is also the reddie videos of kmcarras (on Instagram)
I still don't know how to put links in her (I'll try to figure out while answering) the leach series of Fuji09 (mentioned above) on AO3. A fic called When you say my name by YoungDumbandFullofHeadcanons on AO3 (really a jewelry, but a lot of tw, mostly of transphobia, be careful and take care) and a hard one called "a lot of marshmallow" by MeganRosenberg on AO3 (apparently) kinda hard because it's a violent one. There was others like Above and bellows (I think) i can't find it back to mention, I think the author deleted it.
I'm really proud of the fonction I'm currently writing, even if it's a fiction with an OC and I'm a little ashamed of that(because people judge that a lot). (As said before not posted yet) and my tik toks about Richie and patrick (the two last I've posted.
It's now 3am, and I haven't finished, my phone Will probably get out of power before the end XD (like this I'll see if Tumblr have some automatics saves)
I wish I would, but no... One day, may be if the occasion comes to me :)
I don't really know, I wish we had more content (in french for exemple ! ) But I think the fandom is kinda cool (when we forget all the ship wars and all dramas like this)
I hope I've answered well enough, I'll probably regret doing this that late tomorrow, because I probably forget a lot of things (did i mentioned that i made some It incorrects ? I don't think so) keep asking me things I'm totally open for this (idk if annon are on)
On this, I wish you a good night, or day, or whenever you are and I'm going to keep watching my celling !
Good night 🍈🍈🍈
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peraltasames · 5 years ago
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if devotion is a river then i’m floating away
anonymous: If you’re still taking prompts: Jake/Amy period comfort fic (cause I girl is suffering with these cramps)
in which i project my (and evidently this anon’s and prob everyone’s) desires to have my own jake peralta take care of me while i’m on my period into a fic! 💕 title from ‘love you for a long time’ by maggie rogers ✨
read on ao3
The worst part is Amy was really excited for date night.
(Admittedly, that’s the second-worst part. The worst part is definitely the awful pain in her abdomen that hasn’t relented even after a long, hot bath and a Midol.)
Still, she was really looking forward to whatever romantic activities Jake planned for the evening (or completely unromantic, she would honestly take hot dogs from the cart near his place and making out on his old, musty couch). She hasn’t seen him - properly seen him, outside of work - all week due to an insane caseload for both of them.
Incidentally, spending an entire week without your boyfriend sucks a lot more than it normally would when you just spent six months without him.
The last thing she wants is to cancel their plans, but she can’t even bring herself to get dressed, let alone go to dinner or a movie. Begrudgingly, she sends him a quick text before going to scrounge herself dinner from whatever’s in the fridge.
Sorry babe, I think I have to take a rain check on tonight. Bad cramps. I’ll call you tomorrow xo
After a very underwhelming dinner of a few saltine crackers and half a banana, Amy makes her way to the couch and turns on a home renovation show, hoping it will distract her from the perfect night she was supposed to be having with Jake.
Just before the big reveal of the couple’s newly-renovated San Fransisco townhouse, a sharp knock on her door forces her to drag herself off the couch. Expecting an Amazon delivery person or a neighbour asking her to collect their mail or something along those lines of banality, Amy sighs and swings open the door.
She’s not expecting Jake, wearing the suit that she only gets to see on fancy date nights, precariously balancing several paper bags in his arms.
“Jake, what are you doing here?” she exclaims, taking one of the bags from him before he drops it.
“Bringing supplies, duh,” Jake replies, striding past her to dump the rest of the stuff on the table. “From the drugstore - Midol, Advil, tampons. Chocolate and tea from the grocery store. And-” He gestures to the bag she’s holding. “That one’s dinner.”
She opens the bag and the unmistakable scent of pierogis floods her senses. Oh, he’s scoring major boyfriend points for this one.
“Jake, this is so sweet, I-” Her eyes flit down to his suit again and then widen immediately with concern. “Crap, did you not get my text before you left to pick me up? I really thought I would’ve caught you in time.”
“Oh, I left early to pick these up before our date.” Jake grins, pulling a bouquet of roses from the remaining mystery bag, walking them over to her. In a terrible attempt at a posh British accent, he adds, “For you, my dear.”
Some combination of Jake’s warm gaze and soft smile and this big romantic gesture makes Amy’s eyes begin to well with tears beyond her control.
Jake carefully places the flowers back down on the table, his brows knitting together as he rubs her upper arms gently. “What’s wrong, Ames?”
“Nothing, I just-“ She shakes her head. “You’re here and I missed you so much and I feel like we’ve barely seen each other since you got back and I just - it’s probably just hormones.”
She wipes her eyes and attempts to laugh it off, but Jake looks at her with complete sincerity and reaches upward to gently cup her face in his hands. She melts into his touch, so warm and familiar even after all this time apart.
“I missed you too.”
He leans in to kiss her and she meets him halfway, slowly rising up to her tiptoes so she has better access. She gradually, reluctantly pulls away, pecking his lips quickly before lowering herself and looping her arms around his neck.
“You know, you really didn’t have to do all this.”
“I wanted to,” he assures her, rubbing her forearm. “I wasn’t just going to let you sit at home feeling crappy by yourself.”
Amy smiles, playing with the hair at the back of his neck. “You’re the sweetest.”
“It was also cause I wanted to see you, though, so it’s like fifty-percent for selfish reasons.”
She rolls her eyes and leans in to kiss him again, but a sharp pain in her lower abdomen makes her recoil and grab her stomach.
“You okay?” Jake asks quickly, his hands moving to steady her. She nods, leaning into him for support. “Why don’t you get settled in on the couch with those pierogis and I’ll go get changed into couch-appropriate clothes?”
Amy smiles and lets him lead her to the couch, placing the takeout bag and a couple of plates in front of her before disappearing to her bedroom for a moment. She manages to devour half of her portion of food in the time it takes for him to change and return, wearing sweats and a t-shirt from the designated Jake drawer in her dresser. It’s yet another reminder of the silliness of their disagreement over whose apartment to move into - sure, she loves her place and it’s indisputably better than his, but she would take that tiny, unsafe, dirty apartment if it meant coming home to this every night.
She shifts over on the couch to make room for him to join her and he plops down next to her, forking over a few of his pierogis from the container onto her plate when he notices she’s nearly finished.
“Sorry this isn’t the romantic evening you had planned,” Amy says once they’re done eating, placing her empty plate on the coffee table and leaning into his side.
“Nah, this is like, the most romantic night ever,” Jake mumbles against her hair, and she can’t detect even a hint of sarcasm. “I wish you didn’t feel gross, though. Is there anything I can do?”
Amy thinks for a moment. “You could grab my heating pad from the hallway closet? It’s on the top shelf.”
“On it.”
Jake springs to his feet and returns with the soft grey heating pad, which she can see he’s already turned on to warm up for her. Amy immediately slaps it on her stomach, appreciating the instant relief.
“Anything else, m’lady?”
Already laying down and curling up into the most comfortable position possible right now, Amy nods and pats the space behind her. “You can spoon me while we watch that documentary I was talking about on the history of American spelling bees.”
Jake complies without missing a beat (their usual bets and competitions to decide who gets to pick the movie are put on hold whenever one of them isn’t feeling well) and slides into the space behind her on the couch, immediately wrapping his arms around her.
As soon as she selects the title on Netflix she shifts further into his embrace. As much as she has science to thank for the invention of Midol, she’s always doubly grateful for her boyfriend around this time of the month. Without fail, from the very early stages of their relationship, he’s always been there to give her a back rub or stop at the store to buy her tampons or comfort her during one of her hormone-fuelled breakdowns.
It’s incredibly unfair, she thinks, that she had to endure six months of these emotional breakdowns - made exponentially worse by his absence - without him there to hold her and kiss her hair and tell her it would be okay. There’s a lot of injustice in the world, though, and at least the universe seems to be trying to make amends by granting her perfect moments like these, where all the pain fades away and all she can focus on is his arms wrapped around her.
She can feel him rubbing her back gently with one hand while the other pulls her hair out of the way to lay a kiss on her shoulder, and involuntary goosebumps cover her skin.
“Thank you for coming over,” she whispers, already beginning to feel drowsy from the medication and the relaxation Jake’s presence brings, despite the riveting documentary they’re watching. “I missed this. Missed you.”
She’s yet to find the limit to the number of times she can tell him that since he’s come home. If it’s anywhere near the amount of times she thought about how badly she longed to hear his voice or feel his touch again while he was gone, she figures she must still have thousands of ‘I missed you’s waiting to be said.
“You saw me yesterday, clingy much?” Jake teases, one of his signature attempts to lighten the mood, but his hand still reaches for hers and tightly interlocks their fingers.
“Not what I meant,” Amy quips.
“I know, babe.” He lays another feather-light kiss to her shoulder. “Me too.”
She continues to revel in the feeling of his warm breath against the back of her neck and his gentle kneading of her lower back, the intimate attention and overall feeling of safety slowly coaxing her to sleep.
Perhaps he can sense that she’s fighting to stay awake, to spend as many waking hours with him as possible, because he whispers “sleep, Ames” against the shell of her ear.
“I love you,” she murmurs, pulling his arm tighter around her before giving in to the lure of sleep.
Jake carefully grabs the blanket from the back of the couch and drapes it over both of them, burying his face in her hair once he’s situated.
“I love you.”
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the-cryptid-coven · 5 years ago
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A word before I begin on this topic- I must apologize for taking so long to post another informational blog piece about witchcraft. I did not believe this blog would blow up as big as it did in the first post alone! So thank you so so so much if you liked, reblogged, and/or followed me!! I am so blessed to have had this occur to me.
Also, please tell me using @cypress-gold what you would like to learn more about. I would love to hear from you guys!! You can also mention this blog or my personal blog in a post, and I will most likely reblog!
And always remember that this is not the only way to do tarot, or the only opinion you can have of tarot. Always do what feels right to you and always look through multiple sources for information.
Now, onto the tarot-
With tarot, the first two things you need to do are-
Select a Deck
Cleanse the Deck
We will be going over these two in this post, along with other topics in the near future.
Selecting a deck-
When selecting a deck, there are a few things people think of that make picking a deck a daunting challenge.
Does the deck have to be gifted?
Where do I get a tarot deck?
What deck do I get?
The first question is a simple answer- no, it does not need to be a gifted deck. Although some do believe in this practice, I personally do not. However, if you must get one gifted, maybe use a recommendation from a friend as your “gifting.” Pick three or so that you like and ask a friend which one seems “the most like me.” Whichever one they believe is the most like you could be them gifting you that knowledge and recommendation. This eliminates having to ask people to buy you things or hint at relatives to get you tarot decks for the holidays (although those are also legitimate if you so wish).
I can also do a free personal consultation where you specify your interests and aesthetics and I can show you some tarot deck options @cypress-gold
When buying your own deck, you can find solid options at bookstores, Amazon, and Etsy. (My first deck was one I happened upon at a Spencer’s and I knew couldn’t leave the store without buying it.)
When deciding on what deck to buy, I believe that you actually do have to judge a book by its cover. Decks are stories, and you need to be able to read the illustrations clearly to understand the stories your deck is telling. By choosing a deck that has imagery you personally vibe with, you will have an easier time reading them. I also suggest that beginners get a deck that is not minimalist. The less illustrations to go off of, the less likely you will be able to read them. Your first deck should be full of rich colors and symbolism, which makes readings easier and more fun!
My first deck general recommendation for beginners is the Modern Witch Tarot deck by Lisa Sterle. It is a modern twist to the original Rider deck, with beautiful art and is an easy read for almost anyone. You can find it on Amazon-
The Modern Witch Tarot Deck https://www.amazon.com/dp/1454938684/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_tai_B.D0Db8NZKGR3
My favorite deck to recommend as a second deck is the Unknown Tarot by Kim Krans. It is a universally loved deck with an in-depth booklet, amazing art, and is great for a witch who isn’t necessarily a beginner, but wants another deck to add to their collection after their first ever one. It can also be found on Amazon-
The Wild Unknown Tarot Deck and Guidebook (Official Keepsake Box Set) https://www.amazon.com/dp/0062466593/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_tai_eaE0DbAV7W9TZ
Also, if you are a closet witch, I recommend using a tarot app. My favorite is the Golden Thread Tarot by Labyrinthos. It is a somewhat minimalist design, true, but each card comes with a full description of what it means, and when you are finally out of the closet, you can purchase a physical copy of the deck that you are used to.
Now that you have your deck, it is time for-
Cleansing!
Cleansing a deck before use is essential, according to most witches. Witch tools have many energies that are passed onto them, from the time they are made to the time you own it. With carriers, manufacturers, and so on, other people have touched the deck, and therefore have messed with it and subconsciously made the deck their own in a small way. Think of cleansing like cleaning off other people’s fingerprints.
There are many ways to cleanse, so make sure you find which one is right for you. Here are my favorites, including one I “created” myself.
Cleansing with incense or an herb bundle is the most common way to cleanse an item. By waving your deck through the smoke, it is cleansed by the element of air. I recommend sage or palo santo, but you can also use an herb that you feel represents you.
Cleansing during a moon phase is also common. Pick a moon phase you feel the most connected to (I personally prefer the full moon), and keep your deck at a windowsill for the night. It is cleansed and ready when you wake up!
Keeping it in your bed at night with you, along with a crystal like amethyst or quartz, also helps cleansing and to also imbue your personal energy into the deck along with it. Make sure it is at a point on the bed that you know you won't roll onto it.
My final and favorite way is one I sort of created on my own (although others may do this and I simply do not know. Feel free to tell me). I call it-
Mindfulness Shuffling
What you do is simply count the cards out into piles. You will create-
7 stacks of 10
And
2 stacks of 4
Start with three stacks, placing three initial stack cards down and deal nine more cards onto each pile (going clockwise or left to right), ending up with the three stacks having ten cards in each.
Now do the same thing with four stacks, and then the two with four.
Combine all of the stacks together and repeat two more times.
While you are counting and dealing out the cards, it is important to only focus on cleansing energies and the numbers you are counting. Think of it as a form of meditation. The only thing that matters is making sure you have 78 cards (this also helps if you take your cards on the go and want to make sure you have not dropped any).
I also like to keep around me crystals, some candles, and incense that I feel represents me so as to start imbuing my energy into my deck the first time I cleanse. For me these crystals are white jade, green moss agate, amethyst, and rose quartz, with candles and incense being either frankincense and/or myrrh, and a Leo candle (my sun sign) with palo santo and warm amber.
I like to use this to cleanse and shuffle my cards after cleansing with one of the other techniques, and I also use this shuffle cleanse as a sort of maintenance for my decks. If I don’t do this for some time, my decks seem to keep giving me the same few cards and stop showing me new readings. This used to happen when I first started out, since overhand shuffles aren’t full shuffles and sometimes keeps cards bundled together for a long time without you realizing.
I hope this beginning lesson helps you with your first steps to obtaining a deck. If you have any questions, feel free to ask in my inbox here or go to @cypress-gold
The next parts shall be about tarot spreads, setting up a personal space at your altar for full tarot divination rituals, how to log your tarot readings, and how to get a feel of your deck’s personality.
Blessed be and may the universe provide for you.
~Cypress
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truviewtv · 4 years ago
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IPTV Streaming Service
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The best answer to that question could be to say that IPTV is an initialism that stands for Internet Protocol Television. However, merely breaking down what every letter of IPTV stands for doesn't fairly explain what IPTV is, what it enables you to do, or why it's a invaluable asset in the world of online media streaming – particularly in these attempting instances. IPTV, it seems, perhaps the best factor to happen to the 2020 Corona-virus quarantine that you've got by no means even heard about .. till now.
Basically, IPTV works by offering users with a network on which they will stream live content. So, instead of merely utilizing your individual internet connection with the intention to access streaming content, as is the case with OTT (Over The Top) streaming content suppliers or different free or premium TV streaming websites, IPTV reroutes your laptop into an exterior network, which may be viewed by multiple computer systems concurrently.
In different phrases, as a substitute of, say, throwing on a present on Netflix or Hulu and struggling to watch on the identical time with a buddy in another location, IPTV plugs you each in, remotely, to the live stream, leading to a way more seamless and streamlined live TV experience. This is clearly very totally different from traditional cable tv, which is usually a solitary expertise. IPTV can provide inter connectivity not like another kind of streaming service on the market.
With extraordinarily low latency streaming of live video content, IPTV is just not solely an answer for the informal TV viewer that wishes the quickest and highest decision streaming of live TV, however it is also steadily used as a business or broadcast resolution. In a business context, IPTV can be used for the quickest and most reliable live video chatting, bringing you as close to the workplace as you may be without ever actually having to step foot out your door. Bars and restaurants, too, have used IPTV as a extra reliable option to entry live sporting occasions. The advantages of using IPTV are quite a few, especially in the course of the present pandemic that we're all trying to quarantine ourselves out of.
All around the world, en masse, people have taken to either voluntarily quarantining themselves or being mandated to take action, as within the case of Italy, by their governments. We all need to do our half to assist put an finish to the COVID-19 pandemic, and, so, we've needed to put lots of the societal conveniences that we've taken as a right prior to now on pause for the foreseeable future. Therefore, IPTV might have by no means been more of a handy solution – each for persevering with to make sure that our work will get carried out and not using a productivity halt, in addition to having the ability to socialize whereas persevering with to apply the security precaution of social distancing.
With IPTV, by making use of a a lot larger and extra capable internet network than most of us occur to have readily available, companies can proceed to run easily and with out lag and people can proceed to just about hang with friends, watching their favorite live TV shows collectively, in excellent synchronicity, as if they're actually within the room collectively. IPTV has never been extra related than it's at this time. So, if you're contemplating signing up for an IPTV streaming website, you might be on the best path for a really prudent and handy solution to many issues unique to the modern moment.
What kind of content can I watch on IPTV streaming websites?
Well, that can differ a little bit bit relying on which IPTV streaming service you go together with. But, generally talking, I like to think of IPTV as an internet-based cable provider of types, only an IPTV service is exponentially vast and extra powerful than any traditional cable provider available on the market. The only IPTV streaming websites, to provide you an concept of what I imply, can supply as much as 10,000 TV channels from almost 100 countries around the world. Some of the smaller-scale IPTV websites, alternatively, nonetheless have hundreds of channels – many greater than you'll be provided by a conventional cable supplier.
So, there may be yet one more profit to discovering a great IPTV service: you'll not be restricted to TV networks which might be inside your area or locality. Sure, you'll doubtless be capable of get these as effectively, but the world of cable TV is just about border less with the very best IPTV websites. So, whenever you ask what sort of content may be watched on an IPTV streaming website, it would get you nearer to the reality to ask, instead, ‘what kind of content can I not watch on an IPTV streaming site?’
And the reply to that query, after all, depends on the IPTV stream in question. Basically, IPTV offers cable TV over the web. But some even supply VOD (Video on Demand) streaming as effectively, which solely furthers the capabilities of and strengthens the trigger for locating your self an IPTV subscription.
There are some drawbacks, nonetheless, and so they principally pertain to the VOD side. Not each IPTV service presents VOD. Only a number of of the very best IPTV streaming websites do. So, don't go into the world of IPTV anticipating it to be something in any respect like your experiences with Netflix, Hulu, or Amazon Prime Video. What you are getting, instead, is sort of limitless entry to a globalized cable TV service that may be accessed over the web – no cords required.
My monthly subscription bills are starting to add up … Do I've to pay for IPTV?
Unfortunately, IPTV is just not a free service. Which is comprehensible, proper? I imply, take into consideration the variety of channels and the quantity of worldwide TV access an IPTV website will instantly give you. It is unparalleled. So, it makes complete sense, not less than in my view, that you would need to pay for such a service.
That being mentioned, in lots of circumstances, IPTV is definitely worth ditching your old cable company for, if that is likely one of the payments you will have that's beginning to add up alongside your different streaming companies like Netflix and Hulu. When you contemplate what number of channels IPTV presents, and the way dependable the live streams actually are, it turns into clear that IPTV is likely one of the only (and cost-effective) methods to entry live TV presently available on the market.
I would even consider ditching services like Hulu TV or YouTube TV for an IPTV streaming website. Again, it’s a matter of each amount and high quality. YouTube TV presents entry to one thing like 70 networks for $49.99 a month. One of the very best IPTV websites that I do know of (which we'll talk about in additional depth in a while) offers over 10,000 networks from 70+ different countries. Never miss out on a live occasion or program ever once more.
Is IPTV safe to use?
This query has two implications, I believe. Firstly, is IPTV protected in terms of viruses and knowledge considerations; secondly, is IPTV protected from a authorized standpoint? Well, let’s tackle the virus and data security concern first. As lengthy as you select a good IPTV service (i.e. one from my prolonged record of critiques), you should have nothing to worry about when it comes to contracting viruses (digital or organic if you're staying indoors and watching your IPTV). I might by no means knowingly hyperlink to a malicious web site. That being mentioned, a VPN and good antivirus software program are at all times highly beneficial for anybody who plans on doing something online.
When it involves authorized security, I can't converse to all jurisdictions on this planet, however I do know for a fact that in most free countries, it's not illegal to make use of an IPTV service. Where the authorized grey space comes into impact, nonetheless, is in terms of what the individuals who broadcast content over an IPTV service select to make accessible. In different phrases, if an IPTV service provider doesn't have the rights to a live occasion however they live to stream it over their network anyway, which places them in authorized limbo. You, because the person, nonetheless, are protected to stream as many IPTV packages as you want with no worries.
What is the best IPTV provider on the market?
Well, it is a difficult query. Everybody has their preferences, after all. Personally, if you need the most important bang in your buck I might go together with Smart IPTV (that's the IPTV I discussed earlier with over 10,000 networks). That being mentioned, lots of people actually appear to love Best Buy IPTV (no relation). If you need a greater concept of which IPTV is finest for you, learn via my reviews and weigh your options!
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my-darling-boy · 5 years ago
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Hio! so I want to bind but I can’t (or am not allowed) to get a binder. Is there anything I can use in place of it? I use a sports bra but it doesn’t always work the best. Also best wishes in your pursuit of finding a place to move to ::)
Hello! I just want to say that I’ve DEFINITELY been there before and know that struggle :’) I had a much bigger chest for my size than the little one I have now and figuring out how to conceal my chest was a pain (literally!)
The sort of bad news is that there is really no other “safe” method of binding besides using a binder that was made with safety in mind for a trans/gender non-con person or using a sports bra(s).
As you probably already know, you cannot use medical bandage or duct tape when binding. There are trans people who have tried using TransTape to gauge their level of binding (which could make great for subtle binding cos unlike a binder, you could tape down more or less tightly) but with that being said, I DON’T recommend it. TransTape is—regardless of what misinfo you might hear, even if it was “made by a trans person”— KT tape (that typical black tape you see crossed over nipples) and while it has advantages over a binder, there are still some serious risks to it, more so in some cases than a binder, and causes severe skin irritation in some wearers. Not to mention, it’s just overpriced KT tape that is made to fit a chest more, but with the same danger as usual KT tape
On the flip side, I have a few much safer concealing tips that could make the chest area ambiguous or give the optical illusion the chest is smaller if you are not allowed to purchase/can’t afford a binder. They depend on chest size obviously, but you can give them a go!
1. Layering shirts
This isn’t always going to work with everyone’s dysphoria, but some people find layering shirts can help make the chest area and abdomen equate more in “thickness”/smoothness so there doesn’t appear to be stark contrast between the chest size compared to the rest of the torso
2. Sports bras
Sounds like you’ve already tried this one! Wearing a snug sports bra can help compress. Some people opt to wear two, one facing forwards, and one on top facing backwards. While the additional sports bra may help to smooth out the area, it more often than not does not create more compression as thought, but simply adds another layer of fabric to smooth out the chest area by wearing the bigger, flatter back side of the bra in the front. Be sure you aren’t wearing a sports bra that is much too tight, else you risk the same effects as wearing a tight binder
3. Wearing poofy jackets/sweaters
While this may seem counter intuitive, I personally found this tip for me to be much more helpful than the usual “Wear oversized clothing”. The advantage of wearing a poofy jacket over a big hoodie is that you don’t have to sacrifice the proper fit of an item to get the same (if not better) chest concealment. If you wear a poofy jacket, your chest will only fill up the leftover cavity inside the garment. Basically, it gives the optical illusion on the outside that the poofiness of the jacket/sweater is just the natural poof of the garment, and not because of your chest underneath.
Oversized clothing can still be a helpful tip, but I know I was made dysphoric when I saw that the hoodie/top went out as far as my chest stuck out and made that weird curtain of excess fabric hang down over my abdomen from the “shelf” created by my chest. Poofier garments can help extend outwards the area over your collar bones to create one smooth side silhouette to de-emphasise the appearance of a chest.
This is why I might also advice against turtlenecks, buttoning a shirt all the way to the top or any shirt that would help define (from the side) the space above the chest cos it could spark your dysphoria seeing that deep “swoop” from your neck to your chest
I got a poofy jacket from H&M and it is a GODSEND. Sometimes if I’m going to wear it, I don’t even bind because you can’t tell my chest is underneath. It also has poofy arms which make my shoulders appear bigger, and it cinches in at the wrists and lower abdomen to continue my V shape (or create the illusion of one of you don’t quite have one and want one). And the best part? It still looks like fitted clothing without giving up concealing my chest.
4. Balancing out other parts of the silhouette
This is a case by case basis, as there are many different parts of the body a person can feel dysphoric about, but instead of concentrating on decreasing the size of one body feature, sometimes emphasising another body feature can help make the former appear smaller.
If you can’t bind and want the chest to appear smaller, wearing things with wider shoulders or bulkier arms can help correct the balance of widths in your upper torso. Sewing a strip of interfacing or stiff fabric into the shoulder seams of flannels, button ups, sweaters, and other tops can help add more structure to the upper body and make your chest instead appear more muscular.
Part of this tip will be experimentation, as everyones bodies and how they experience dysphoria is different. You may find high waisted trousers make you feel less dysphoric or for some reason wearing This One Shirt makes you feel really good about your chest!
5. Asymmetrical or scattered shirt patterns
Striped shirts, mostly vertical but also horizontal, and squared “grid-like” patterns can sometimes create unneeded definition to any chest. When thinking of three dimensional objects, vertical and horizontal lines are there to provide depth. If our brains detect depth variations in straight lines (for instance, in a vertically striped shirt over a large chest) our brains can easily decipher shapes behind those lines because the lines define depth.
Therefore, shirts with crazy “busy” patterns, asymmetrical lines, diagonal lines, dotted shirts, or plain shirts patterned with drawings or singular objects, you can visually disrupt people’s ability—as well your own— to see the depth of your chest (i.e. how far it sticks out).
ALSO.
If you would still like to order a binder and bind only when out in public but need to buy it secretly because of parents or guardians making your life difficult, during the holidays or nearing a birthday is a GREAT time to buy. If you order the package yourself and it arrives, you can say it’s a gift for a friend.
I don’t know about other binder brands but Underworks is my go-to binder, and I know they sell through Amazon. Meaning, it’s discrete packaging just marked with the Amazon logo and no one will know you’re buying a binder. DEFINTIELY opt to do your own laundry if you don’t already or wash it in the tub/sink and let it air dry in your room so you can always make sure no one at home knows you have it.
Obviously, if you have very strict people at home, be careful or don’t do this at all; it’s just my advice to someone who knows they could successfully do something like this. If you shouldn’t risk it, don’t, and opt for the latter tips instead
And thanks for the best wishes too!
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