#but no seriously it's so intense the amount of fertilizer you need to keep track of

[swagging-back-to]

lol researching how to grow pot rn and wowzers this is intense.

[lokiskitten]

Will you do a sequel of the Valentines Day fic like you mentioned at the end of part 4?

Loki Laufeyson | affliction pt1

Loki Laufeyson x fem!reader

A/N : this imagine is meant to follow the events which occurred in my previous series :”Valentine’s Day”!! You can find it lower on my page.

plot : A couple of weeks have passed since you’ve first slept with Loki. However, after learning that you are pregnant, you find yourself forced to reveal it all to your partner. Unfortunately, his reaction doesn’t turn out to be the one you expected.

warnings : very light smut, angst, fighting/arguing.

Loki and you had been seeing each other since a couple of weeks now. You had managed to keep it a secret, and that from anyone in the kingdom which obviously- and certainly- included your parents. You couldn’t truly explain why and how Loki never failed to make you feel so good, but you knew that you did not wish for those sensations to end any time soon. You two were meant to be together, wether the royal family wanted it or not. Though, shortly after your little unprotected frolics occurred, you had progressively started to become sick here and there. Your doctor had easily established a diagnostic which he promised to keep to himself for now, and that no matter if Loki was Prince. You were pregnant.

Pregnant with Loki’s child. What worst could potentially happen? Now, it was sure that you would have to annonce that to you respective families- something you didn’t feel ready to do. Or at least, certainly not alone. Therefore, you felt like the young man should be the first person to learn about it, especially as he was the father and you trusted him more than anyone else. Little did you know, there was still a lot of things you needed to learn regarding your boyfriend.

[ ... ]

It was a lovely spring afternoon. You and Loki had decided to reunite in his room in order to spend some time together. As you laid down on top of the young man, lovingly grinding your hips against his in order to make sure that his member would be coming in and out of you at a pleasurable pace, Loki had his arms wrapped around your back. His hands were soon to move down to your bum, digits digging into the soft flesh as if he wished to guide your hips through the intercourse. His thick thighs tensed upon sensing his nearing orgasm, soles now resting against the mattress instead of being on the loose.

It didn’t take long for white sperm to spray out of his urethra, staining your walls and cervix as both of you moaned in harmony. It was nothing too intense, but you always enjoyed spending time with him in that way no matter what technic or pace you two used. You allowed Loki to fully wash out his orgasm before you could get off him, your silhouette slipping underneath the covers as you pulled the sheets all the way up to your chest. Your breasts were now covered, as well as everything which came underneath.

Turning around, the male’s arm wrapped around your body as his chin rested onto your shoulder, his lips pressing delicate kisses against your warm flesh in order to let you know that he loved you. As his eyelids closed, yours remained clearly open as your brain wouldn’t stop thinking about how you were meant to annonce such a tragic piece of information to him. “Loki?..��� you finally found the strength to speak up, though it would probably take you a large amount of time to finally arrive to the point where you would annonce your unwanted pregnancy.

Opening his eyes upon hearing his name, Loki was now ready to dedicate his entire attention to your seemingly tired self. You turned around and allowed your body to face his, the tip of your fingers nervously tracing shapes against his bare chest. “Yes?” He asked face to your lack of constructed sentence. “When we make love.. what happens?” You asked shyly, hoping that he would understand that you were hinting towards the natural fertilization process. Ending face to face with such a peculiar question didn’t seem to disturb the demigod who, instead of answering you right away and as seriously as he could, simply lowered his body in order to rest his head against your chest. A smirk displayed on his features.

“A lot of good things~” Loki purred, hand squeezing your waist in a possessive manner. You couldn’t help but sigh face to his answer, though you remained aware that getting mad at him so soon probably wasn’t such a wonderful idea. Instead, you tried to explain the matter in another way. “No. Look, when two persons make love, what happens to the woman? Inside of her body.” You asked him on a determined tone, hoping that he would understand that you weren’t joking around. Though Loki remained silent, cluelessly looking up at your face. Again, this sight managed to irritate you.

“Jesus. I’m pregnant!” You announced on a frustrated tone, staring right into Loki’s eyes to make sure that he would understand that it was an absolutely serious matter. An awkward silence settled in the room, the two of you making eye contact as you desperately waited for your boyfriend to say something. But instead of speaking up about the matter, he calmly turned around and sat down on the edge of the bed before getting up and walking over to the window. Face to this peculiar yet thankfully passive reaction, you sat up and frowned. “Loki?..” you solicited him shyly, scared that any of your words could now cause an outburst.

“It’ll kill you.” He ended up affirming, back still facing your silhouette. You frowned even harder. “What do you mean?..” you answered hesitantly, suddenly becoming scared of the situation due to your partner’s remark. You couldn’t seem to understand how a fetus could be responsible for your death. “It’ll kill you, freeze you from within.” Loki explained further, causing chills to appear on your back face to this terrific announcement. However, you decided to carry on fighting his statements. “Loki this is our child... Nothing will happen to me.” You affirmed softly, hoping that this would manage to make him change his mind about all those rather creepy thoughts and suppositions. You obviously had no idea that he was a frost giant.

Loki knew that in order to prove you wrong, his only remaining option was to show you what he truly was. A monster. Turning back around, his eyes were the first part of his body which switched from green to red, skin and hair soon following as the young man turned into a frost giant before your bare eyes. It was an unexpected, impressive, and intimidating sight all at once. You didn’t know how to react, fearing that any negative remark would cause the young man to get offended. “See me as I am. The monster your mother used to tell you about back when you still were a child.” Loki spoke sternly, which betrayed the fact that he felt ashamed of what he truly was.

Gasping anxiously, your hands gripped onto the bedsheets in order to contain the amount of fear which travelled through your organism. However, your brain was soon to remember that the man who stood before you, and who you loved, would never do anything to hurt you. Meanwhile, Loki made sure to regain a normal appearance as himself felt ashamed of his true nature and didn’t wish to remain in that form for too long. Now this managed to reassure you entirely. “Get rid of it. And try to stay discreet. I wouldn’t want the entire kingdom learning about our frolics.” He finished, words as cold as his birth specie.

Those statements broke your heart. You could barely believe that such cruel words had escaped Loki’s lips- though little did you know it all came from the personal and internal sufferance he was forced to deal with. Instantly you got up from the bed, taking decisive steps towards the man who found himself backing away out of surprise. Your hand harshly landed against his cheek, his head turning to the side in a rather violent manner. “How dare you! You’re talking about our child..” you spoke, tone turning from angered to saddened. Your voice was filled with sorrow.

A harsh sigh escaped Loki’s lips, his green eyes landing onto your face again as he barely managed to find the words to express himself face to such unexpected violence. “You’re acting just like your father.” You ended up adding whilst taking a step back, body soon crouching down in order to reach for your clothes as this statement managed to pull Loki out of his shocked state. He was now as angered as you were. “He’s not my father, and I’m nothing like him! How dare you-“ the demigod began, though only to be stopped in his track by your silhouette which moved back up on its feet.

“Then why are you acting like him?” You responded sadly, pulling the straps of your dress over your shoulders before turning around and beginning to take decisive steps towards the door. Again, the raven haired man was left in a state of shock before he finally managed to get back to reality face to your departure. “Where are you going?” He questioned calmly, muscles flexing underneath the sun of Asgard which penetrated through the large window. “To see your mother.” You answered, hand reaching for the door knob before you opened the door and exited his room.

You believed that if Loki refused to understand, his mother surely would manage to feel empathy face to your distress. The young man was left alone with nothing but his own distress as painful company, stomach growing knots due to anxiety taking possession of his organism. He didn’t fear his mother’s reaction at all, and expected her to be happy for her son. However, Odin surely wouldn’t appreciate to learn that the girl who was formerly meant to go to the ball with Thor had been stolen by his youngest son, and that on top of that she was pregnant.

I hope y’all enjoyed this! Feel free to let me know what you’d like to see in part 2! Sorry for being kinda inactive. Love y’all ❤️ requested tag : @delightfulheartdream

[bringontheemos]

CHAPTER 6 of Itachi x OC Yuri! Just a few more updates and Tumblr will be caught up with my Wattpad posts! If you want to read ahead (because I’m slow as crackers), my username is the same @bringontheemos !

~~~~~~

*Our wonderful leaf ninja!*

"Finally, we made it." Kiba and the group stopped at the top of a tree and looked over the area. The trees and plants were decaying at an incredible rate, the air was thick and sour, and the sky over head was a dark grey even though it was midday.

"What happened here?"

"That's what we're here to find out. Shino," Shikamaru starting giving his orders.

"Yeah. I'm already on it." Shino sent out his bugs so they could check the perimeter and hopefully gather clues.

Neji and Hinata used their byakugan to scout the area. "Kiba, I know this is a drag but can you tell what happened?"

Akamaru stuffed his nose into his master's sleeve while Kiba pinched his nose closed. "No doubt about it, everything rotted. We can't pick up anything other than that."

"Shikamaru, what do you think happened?"

The team leader looked over the area and took his comrades evidence into account. "That's a good question. According to Lady Tsunade, this place was just like this about 70-80 years ago. After that, it became the most fertile place in the world. You could plant a dead seed and it would still grow."

"Really? This place doesn't seem all that special to me!"

"Anyway the villagers wouldn't tell any of the surrounding lands how they kept their crops growing. Most believe it could have been some sort of jutsu of some kind."

"Hey, Shikamaru," Kiba and Akamaru were standing next to a large pile of something. "I think... this is a pile of people."

"What?!" Everyone rushed over to the pile and examined it. As Kiba said, these were human corpses.

"Man, this place keeps gettin more and more creepy!"

"Another thing," Shino started. "My bugs, they're heading in a different direction. They're being drawn in by something."

Shikamaru had to make a decision; follow Shino's insects or investigate the area further. "Maybe this thing your bugs are going to, absorbs life somehow. If we follow them it could lead us to who is responsible for this."

"Okay." The young ninja followed Shino as he lead them through the forest.

"What the hell is that?!" Kiba pointed to a large structure in the distance. When they got closer they realized it was a tree.

"That's interesting."

"What is it, Neji?"

"This tree. If someone conjured it up with ninjitsu, then it would have their chakra running through it, but this tree doesn't have that. We can only assume it grow to this size on its own. I've taken this route many times for missions and I've never seen it before."

"Oh wow, Neji," Naruto said baffled. "Maybe you need to get your eyes checked or somethin. How'd you miss a tree this big?" The blonde stood next to the tree showing how much wider it is that himself.

"Can I kill him yet?" Sakura looked as though she would pop a blood vessel.

"Cut it out. We need to take Neji's clues seriously. Let's keep moving though. We might find more information up ahead."

"It shouldn't be much longer now." The others gathered behind Shino again and left the strange tree.

~~~~~~

"Are we there yet? We've been moving for hours!"

"Oh, Naruto." Hinata was the only one to find Naruto's company pleasing.

"Quiet!" Shino jumped to the ground and signaled for everyone to stop. "That's where my bugs are headed."

A young woman sat with her back turned to them and she was petting a deer that had walked up to her. She was sitting far away from them so they couldn't hear what she was saying, but they could all clearly see the Akatsuki cloak she was wearing.

"So an Akatsuki did this?" Naruto was already about to jump in and go after her.

"Wait, Naruto!" Shikamaru whisper yelled. "Let's come up with a strategy." The teenagers talked amongst each other to get a jump on the enemy.

Yuri's POV

"Hey, little deer!" I held a hand out to gently stroke it's head. "*cough* I know he told me to rest but I just can't. ...Anyway, you should go home. It's sunset you know." The deer stepped back and headed back into the forest. "Sweet little thing."

I remembered that I would need to make dinner so I started to get up, but for some reason I couldn't. "What's this?! I can't move! *coughing fit*"

"Now, Neji!" I attempted to look behind me to see where the sound was coming from, but something hit me before I could even try. It felt like my body had lightning shooting through it.

"Gentle fists! Your turn, Naruto!"

'Another one?! I don't think I can take it!'

"Rasenga-"

I had to throw up some kind of defense before it hit me from behind too.

"Dammit! She blocked it!" The strange hold on my body faded as well so I turned to the threat behind me. "Let me try one more time! Hold still, lady!"

A blonde teenage boy began walking up to me with a small ball of chakra in his palm. "A-ah- I...."

"Yeah~ What is it?"

This kid was frightening. I ducked down and started pleading. "I'm sorry! I don't know what I did, but I'm sorry! Is this about the dog?! Please, I'll do anything to atone just don't kill me!"

"Huh?" The blonde kid stopped in his tracks and his ball of magic faded.

"Don't let your guard down, Naruto! She could be deceiving you!" Another teen with long brown hair and white eyes yelled to the boy in front of me.

"Neji, wait!" A girl with the same white eyes grabbed the male's attention. "Look at her chakra network!"

He looked back at me with veiny, scary eyes. "Huh."

"What's wrong? What can you see, Neji?" Other teens appeared and a cute puppy came out too.

"Her chakra network isn't fully developed. She's not a skilled shinobi. It's accurate to say that she may be training. But, she has an intense amount of life energy. It's actually seeping out of her body."

I wasn't paying too much attention to what he was talking about, all that mattered was that I hurt and my body ached everywhere. Whatever I was hit with hurt like hell.

"*cough attack* why- are you here? What did I do?"

A boy in the middle of the group addressed me. He had had his long hair tied in a ponytail on top of his head. "Why don't you tell us who you are?"

[strainingfororiginality]

Chapter 1.5 - Justice

Raphael led him out of the building and the cool, fresh air of the outdoors hit him nicely. Quintus took a big deep breath of it, hoping to catch the scent of the angelica that he had caught in the hallway days before, but he smelled nothing. He desperately wished to have his abilities back and a frown crept upon his face.  Raphael took note at once.

"What’s wrong?" The angel prodded.

"Nothing." Quintus shook his head as he sighed.

The angel walked him down to the street, bringing him before some kind of carriage. It was more modern than any he’d ever ridden before and it was pulled by what he could only assume was a hydra. The colourfully feathered serpent easily standing over twenty feet tall and all five of its heads peered at Quintus with inquisitive yet accusatory eyes. Raphael spoke something in their special language and the beast responded with full sentences in turn.

While they spoke, Quintus admired the gold, silver, and bronze swirls interlaced throughout the steel compartment. As the tiny door opened, he squeezed himself in, facing forward as Raphael took the opposite seat, directly facing him.

"A hydra?" He asked and Raphael smiled widely, as he always did.

"Arariel is a water seraph. They are formally called Chalkydri, but yes. You do know them colloquially as hydras."

When the carriage began to move eventually, there was no amount of rocking or bumping involved. The movement was entirely surreal as they seemed to just glide forward. The lack of sensation was completely unnerving.

"Where are we going?" He questioned at once.

"To the Court. It’s not housed in the Citadel. It’s built on top of the River of Truth. It is the place that allows no lies." Raphael answered matter of factly.

"But, if there is no where any longer, then why do we need to travel to get there?" Quintus asked and Raphael laughed out loud, showing his full set of fangs for the second time.

"Good. You’re quite right." He shook his head, “This trip is for … your benefit.”

Quintus shifted his attention momentarily from the window back to the angel, who was watching him quite intensely, "My benefit?"

"To show you that it might be in your benefit to continue your existence here. It's not a bad place to be, after all. Would you really give this up for simple vengeance?"

Turning back to the window as he spied what he assumed were dragons dancing across the far horizon and he sighed, "I do wish to exist."

"Good." Raphael chimed before he leaned back, smiling again, “But I have asked that it take us the long way regardless.”

Quintus watched and cataloged each thing and building they passed, however he doubted the need to do such a thing. Everything was abstract enough that he thought it might change and quite regularly.

But whatever he saw, his face remained devoid of emotion driving Raphael to comment on it. "I am learning that it must take quite a bit to impress you."

"I’ve seen many things." Quintus stated simply.

"But nothing like this." Raphael assumed.

"I am no longer shocked by anything I might see here. This is simply how things are now." Quintus huffed a shrug but he refused to tear his eyes from the spectacle occurring all around them.

"Your hubris is absolutely astounding." Raphael mused. It wasn’t an insult nor was it conveyed with any hint of annoyance. Nothing he said ever was. It was simply an interesting fact to him and the laugh that followed was of pure entertainment.

"My hubris has been well-earned." He assured him with a sneer.

"Perhaps … perhaps there it was. But here, you should learn to let go of it. You are far from the strongest any longer." Raphael stated and Quintus looked back to him in slight discomfort.

"I am aware of that."

"Good. Accept it. Let go of your need to control everything around you. There is no longer a need to struggle, Quintus." Raphael leaned forward and spoke softly. “Embrace change. It has to be freeing to … no longer worry about the entire world? To no longer need to worry about Destiny?”

He turned his attention back out of the window, "You say that as if it is an easy feat. You have no idea what my life is … was … like."

"Actually, I’ve learned many things about you over the last few weeks. Things that even you aren’t aware." Raphael leaned back and relaxed with smugness, “And honestly, I am surprised you are not more affected by your life. Most men would have been crushed by what you’ve had to endure.”

Quintus was uneasy about what he might have learned. "I do not wear my emotions on my sleeve … as you apparently do."

"Perhaps you should consider it. I’ve always found it quite … enlightening." That damn contagious smile again and if the golden sphinx hadn’t just walked by them stealing his immediate attention, he felt that he might have returned a small smile to the mocha-skinned angel.

With all of his pleasantries and grins, this laid-back being seemed simple, but Quintus knew this was far from the case. His presence was gentle, genuine, and virtuous yet there lurked a power hiding within him that shook Quintus to his core as he observed Raphael again.

Though his mannerisms were slight and small, the conveyance was energetic and his smiles were shared with almost reckless abandon, even in his most serious moments. For the first time since he’d met the ancient being, Quintus felt his own disdain for Raphael finally starting to disperse. As clarity took hold in his mind, his felt his mistrust begin to fade and something happened that he had never experienced before. He felt himself pulling emotion. His face fell as he ingested the feeling and found that it was sadness which emanated so strongly from the ancient being.

His mouth opened to ask what might have been troubling the angel when he realized that he should probably not disclose being able to feel this. This was coming from In Nexu. He uttered another question as Raphael had already noticed he was in the process of asking something.

"How long has it been on Earth since I arrived?" He asked hoping Raphael knew this since Ozryel did not.

The angel grew quiet as he seemed to think about it for a moment, "A little over five months now."

Quintus nodded with acceptance and appreciation. "Thank you." It was much longer than he felt he had been here, but it was not years and for this he was grateful.

"You still worry for those you left?" Raphael inquired but Quintus ignored him as he diverted his attention back to the landscape and watched quietly as the urban setting became less dense and more rural the farther they traveled down the bumpless road.

He leaned forward to peer out the window and down the bridge that they had come across. The water beneath them was crystal clear and he could see things swimming with in, just under the surface, but it was the little things that fluttered around its surface in a massive swarm that drew his ultimate attention. They were dragonflies, hundreds of them, possibly even thousands and Quintus’ mouth fell agape slightly.

"Dragonflies?" He gawked, trying to mask the surprise that leaked into his voice.

"Yes. The Serpent’s Doctor." Raphael was pleased to offer, “Divine messengers. The carriers of the dream.” Raphael smiled, “And there is no greater divinity than the dream.”

"Serpent’s doctor?" The term was strange to Quintus.

"Yes. There are few creatures that are considered more divine than either the serpent or their doctor."

Quintus twitched at the thought of it before offering up something he thought was almost common knowledge, "How is that so? Serpents are generally representative of evil, are they not?"

Raphael shook his head, "As well as fertility, life, and healing. Christianity chose to villainize serpents because of Eden …" His words seemed to trail off, but he steered the conversation back on track immediately, “But if you consider other cultures, they are universally worshipped.” That smile again. “Look around. If you haven’t noticed yet … We’re all serpents here, Quintus.”

Raphael’s face was suddenly much like Ozryel’s face had been in the beginning as Quintus gazed upon a far more gaunt face, drawn and tight, with much higher cheekbones and much thinner lips as his face came to more of a central point now. It was entirely more like a serpent now and at once Quintus realized the angel was sharing his own facial features. But the spectacle was short lived as Raphael’s face was now back to entirely human and he beamed at Quintus as he blinked softly. Damn shapeshifter.

After the display, he wasn’t sure what else to ask and for the first time since they had left the Citadel, Raphael turned his attention away from Quintus and out the window as he watched the massive swarm of flying bugs dance across the surface of the crystal clear lake, seeming to keep perfect pace with the carriage itself. The angel seemed to lose himself in thought before he spoke strangely, his voice almost distant, "The dragonfly is considered to be an agent of change."

Taking note of the uncharacteristic behaviour, Quintus brazenly asked, "Does something trouble you?"

The speed at which Raphael candidly responded surprised Quintus incredibly, "I am worried about Michael. Ozryel’s return has affected him greatly. I have never seen him in such a state before." The angel’s face expressed his internal concern clearly as he looked down to his hands.

"He is not always so … disagreeable?" Quintus asked, attempting to be somewhat polite about the unlikeable governor.

Raphael found himself laughing at the statement as he shook his head, "No, no, no. He’s always disagreeable. Or at least he has been since … Ozryel was lost."

"Hmmm. I get the impression that she was quite different back then than she is now." He sighed as Raphael nodded.

"Yes." Raphael spoke as he remembered fondly, “She was a force of nature. Body, mind, and spirit. Heaven lost something profound that day … Even God wept.” Seriousness crept back over his face and Quintus jumped at the opportunity to breach the subject.

"She claims that God is ... absent?"

A sober expression befell the angel’s face as he closed his eyes momentarily before looking back out the window, offering no response. No words were needed as the answer to his question was clear.

Quintus followed suited and returned to watching the landscape as it passed them by. The flora and fauna seemed to frolick with no particular rhyme or reason and he almost found the vividness of the sky and the creatures that danced within it all too much as he looked back and saw the angel staring directly at him intently … again.

"Do you have cameras here?"

The question confused the angel and he furrowed his black brows, "I suppose so. Why do you ask?"

"You might take a picture instead. It will last longer." Quintus quipped as he turned to eye the man who seemed to be unable to stop staring at the dhampir any chance he had. Raphael, still slightly grinning with amazement, was not embarrassed nor deterred by Quintus’ obviously annoyed remark.

"You misunderstand. I find you fascinating. This gives you discomfort?" His smile, always genuine and without any hint of malice, showed his amazingly white teeth fully again.

"On the contrary … I am quite used to people gawking. I just assumed that such an act would be beneath someone like you." Quinlan sneered in response.

"Your words are defensive without proper cause. You are assuming that I look because I am disgusted." Raphael never moved his eyes from Quintus’, “I marvel because you are a wonder, Quintus. A unique being ... destined for greatness.”

Quintus furrowed his brow at the words as those had been Ancharia’s words for him exactly. Did Raphael know this? Could he know this? Perhaps she had told him this in the last few weeks? A unique being … destined for greatness. "I am not unique. There were four before me." He challenged.

Raphael frowned as he shook his head, "It’s unfortunate. They no longer exist."

Quintus turned quickly to stare into the violet eyes, his brows furrowing in trouble, "No longer exist? They were …" His voice trailed off as he looked down to the floor, not wishing to finish that sentence. “By whom?”

"Michael. That is his charge. His duty." Raphael said with a straight face.

"Why was I permitted to exist?" He asked, finally exposing some hint of mild emotion.

"That is a conversation you should have with Ozryel. Perhaps even Michael if you wish to risk it. It’s not my place. Regardless … you are nothing like they were." As Quintus stared back into the man’s vibrant violet eyes, Raphael permitted him reprieve from his attention, as he looked out into the countryside, offering up one final intriguing thought before their ride came to a gentle stop, “You really have no idea do you?”

As Quintus started to stand, Raphael waved him to remain seated and he peered out the window. What he had called a barrier was in fact a mountain range that seems to encircle around them for as far as he could see. Before them was the widest and longest staircase that he had ever seen and it was littered with people and other beings. There seemed to be a bit of a crowd gathering around their carriage as well and Quintus sat back, out of view, as people began to try and peer into the window from outside.

Raphael waved a hand at him and Quintus furrowed his brow, "What?"

"Your appearance."

"I …" He looked down at his hand and tried again, closing his eyes tightly as he concentrated but when he opened them, his hands were still the same as he shook his head, “I cannot.”

"You are trying. That is the problem." He looked up to an amused violet-eyed face. “Don’t try to do it … just will it.”

Will it. The same words the angel’s older brother gave to him when he was coaxing him to defeat the Master. Will it.  He tried, but his hands remained just as white and he huffed.

"Keep trying. We won’t go in until you have it." Raphael said.

"Then we will be here forever." Quintus spat and sat back in the seat with sullen defiance.

Raphael laughed, "So very dramatic. Are you always this way?"

Quintus could feel himself pouting and he sneered a lie to the angel, "No." He was only dramatic on certain occasions.

You were the light that is blinding me

You're the anchor that I tie to my brain

'Cause when it feels when I'm lost at sea

You're the song that I sing again and again

All the time, all the time

I think of you all the time

"Do you wish to exist, Quintus?" Raphael asked simply.

"Yes." He frowned again.

"Why?" Raphael pressed.

"My reasons are my own." He said lowly as he crossed his arms across his chest. “Why?”

"I’m not asking to know your reasons. Whatever they are, you don’t need to disclose them. it doesn’t matter to me. But use them to encourage yourself. You wish to exist, think about why and know that unless you do this now, it's unlikely that what I have planned will work."

Quintus leaned forward as he raised a brow, "And what exactly do you have planned?"

"Nope." Raphael shook his head as he smiled, “You decided to be difficult, so you’ll just have to remain in the dark like everyone else.”

Quintus closed his eyes tightly as he didn’t wish to remember these things right now, especially not in front of the archangel who could feel so very much. He’d push the memories out of his head as soon as they would try to surface. He feared that he would break down again if he revisited them now. Up until this point, he had been terrified to even think about … his reason.

Sighing deeply, he thought about this fully now. He thought about it very clearly, picturing every single element in his mind. He thought about its spots and the lovely green of its eyes. He thought about its short stature and then about the mole on its lower right back. About the texture of that mole after he had touched it softly that night on the couch when he had no right to do so. He could admit that even back then, he knew he had already laid claim. No, it was even before then. He knew the moment that she saved him, she was his.

He thought about the feeling of its curves crushing against his chest. He thought about her aroma next, so earthy and musky and sweet. He thought about his reason for wanting to exist and the flavour of her, of every part of her that he had tasted. And finally, the sound of her voice as she spoke his name.

He smiled as he realized he was so full of shit. So absolutely and utterly full of shit. There wasn’t a moment that went by where he wasn’t thinking about this reason. He was thinking of it all the time.

"Good." Raphael’s voice shook him from his trance and as his eyes opened, he looked down at his human skinned hand and found it was shaking with hot emotion. And for the first time since he’d met the angel, Raphael touched him, placing a hand on his shoulder as he gripped it firmly, “No separation is permanent, Quintus. Whoever it is that makes you ache so very much, rest assured that you will be reunited here eventually.”

Raphael removed his hand promptly and Quintus shook his head, while he qualified the angel’s statement, "If … I am allowed to exist."

"Have faith. It will be a good day for you. I promise it." The angel smiled even wider as he raised his eyebrows playfully, “This trial was over before it even began.”

"Now who is the one full of hubris?" Quintus quipped causing the angel to chuckle at him with extreme amusement.

Raphael exited first without another word and as Quintus stepped down from the stairs, a gentle and warm breeze struck them as it carried more dragonflies on its currents. He smiled to himself as Raphael’s confidence seemed to be contagious and he felt like it might actually be a good day today.

The crowd was now impressive and seemed to only be growing as they mounted the steps, making their way up the side of the steep mountain. People gawked, whispered, and pushed to get full view of the two as they walked.

"Mister Quinlan! Mister Quinlan!!!" When he heard the voice, he did not recognize the tone of it but he turned to see who would call out to him using such a title. As he spun, he saw a shorter young man who waved for his attention from the crowd. While Quintus paused, Raphael kept his forward momentum as he approached a couple just ahead of them, striking up a conversation.

Quintus stared for a moment. The young woman was quite short, though a smidge taller than his poet, with rich blonde hair and vivid blue eyes. While she wasn’t generically beautiful, he found her extremely pleasant in every single way that was possible. Her smile was warm and kind.

The man who stood beside her was markedly less warm and kind and at least an inch taller than himself. His face was gaunt and serious as he seemed to be staring directly at Quintus with an uncomfortable and judgemental glare. He knew this look as the man was sizing him up. His eyes were a colder blue than the woman’s whom he held a protective arm around and his hair was a lighter and duller blonde.

His stare was unnerving to Quintus and very few people were even capable of having that effect on him and as he gazed back, he was almost certain he had seen that face before, but he was having a hard time pinpointing it. It had not been recent, whenever it had occurred and he urged himself to go forward and greet them with Raphael, but something held him back. Some part of his subconscious was almost nauseated at the thought of approaching them.

Unable to hear what was being discussed, he turned his attention back to the man in the crowd who was still calling out to him and Quintus squinted at him.

It took him more than a moment to realize he’d seen this face before and very recently, though it had been much older. As he approached the man, he found himself questioning his assumption briefly, "Professor?" He stuttered.

Once he was within reach, Abraham reached out and grabbed his hand firmly as he smiled massively, "How are you?!?"

Quintus blinked in surprise, "You look a bit … different, Professor."

The ‘young’ man nodded as he clasp a hand on the dhampir’s shoulder, giving him a friendly and relieved squeeze before he pulled him in for a full embrace. Quintus generally didn’t like this type of contact, but he found himself returning it fully, "As do you, Mr. Quinlan." He chimed as he grinned, “As do you.” And he chuckled, “And, it’s just Abraham now.”

"Indeed. Abraham. Indeed." He stared with amazement at the man as the last time he’d seen these eyes, he had closed them on his severed head. Today was a good day and Quintus bit back the desire to embrace the man again.

"You did it." Abraham’s young face was on the verge of tears as he continued, “You did it.” Quintus was rarely at a loss for words and as he stared the ‘young’ Professor, as Abraham actually hugged him yet again and he allowed and return it yet again.

"Yes." He said plainly and Abraham looked at him perplexed at his lack of exuberance at completing his lifelong task.

"You did it." He reiterated as Quintus finally took note of the lovely woman by the professor’s side, clinging to his arm quietly, and he found himself staring as he wondered about her.

Abraham turned sharply, "This is Miriam. My wife." Abraham beamed as he introduced him to his beloved.

Quintus bowed to her slightly, "Mrs. Setrakian."

"I have heard so very much about you, Mister Quinlan." She said to him timidly but her attention shifted immediately to the angel that now stood beside them and she blushed furiously as she looked down to the ground.

"I am sorry to interrupt." Raphael stated as he placed his hand on his chest and gave Miriam a small apologetic nod. “But, we need to be going. You’ll have eternity for reminiscing afterwards.” Raphael waved up the stairs as he met Quintus’ eyes, “Shall we?”

The top of the stairs opened to a remarkably small amphitheatre. Besides its size, its layout reminded Quintus distinctly of the Colosseum. He wasn’t sure how he felt about being on display at the very center, but he walked closely with Raphael as they descended towards the middle.

All manner of creatures bustled around, carrying on loud conversations with each other, yet a noticeable silence fell over them as the two would brush by. For the most part, the audience was not human, though he spied a few scattered throughout the celestial beings, particularly a dark-skinned and dark-haired woman that he’d met once before in that somewhat embarrassing dream.

His eyes locked onto hers for a brief and fleeting moment and she looked away immediately, unable to conceal her nervousness at his attention. Quintus read the intent easily. She did not wish to give the impression she knew him. This was a secret, as he was getting the impression everything having to do with his Poet was. _So be it. _ He looked away, smoothly and naturally, not sharing even a lingering stare as their acquaintanceship went entirely unnoticed.

The bearded man who stood before them now was nothing short of a mountain. Quintus had to cock his head up to look into his face as this man was easily at least an inch taller than even Mr. Fet himself. He recognized him instantly. This was the creature that had … retrieved him when he had first arrived in Heaven. He distinctly remembered the punch and Quintus flared his nostrils at him.

His build was incredibly muscular and wide. His hair was long and brown, and his eyes were an unnatural amber. There was a conspicuous scar across his left eyebrow and for a moment Quintus doubted who he was assuming it to be. Did angels scar? Did archangels scar?

"Brother." Raphael nodded as he smiled, providing the mountain with a single word greeting and now Quintus was absolutely sure.

This was Gabriel.

".רעהטאָרב עלטטיל, נוואָד קקאַב אָט עטאַל אָאָט טאָן ס'טי"

Gabriel spoke to his brother in their secret language and Quintus found himself glaring at the giant. He had no idea what had been said, but given the mannerisms and tone, it had been unpleasant.

"But I thought you enjoyed a good challenge?" Raphael smirked a response, to which Gabriel shook his head, turning his attention directly to Quintus.

"Hiding your true nature won’t save you from Justice, Abomination." He spat as he turned his back and walked to his side of the court floor, taking a seat on a stone bench.

Raphael waved Quintus to a bench directly opposite of Gabriel’s and they both sat as the dhampir leaned over to ask in a whisper, "How does he have a scar?" He pressed. He was mostly curious if something could hurt an archangel and Raphael sighed heavily shaking his head.

"It's because he’s a child and he does it to mock Michael."

"Mock Michael?"

There might have been more conversation on the matter as Quintus wasn’t fully grasping what he meant, but as Michael entered, the chaos of the area seemed to melt away. People began to take their seats all around. He wondered … to mock him? Was Michael scarred? He was not even sure Michael had a face behind that helmet. He was partially convinced the armor was all he was.

The silver clad angel sat down loudly and Quintus’ mouth fell agape instantaneously. He’d seen the angel before, but now Michael carried with him an ornate metal staff. It was intricately carved with spirals, leaves, and various other geometric shapes; inlaid with gold, silver, bronze and copper. Its top housed four stones, all of varying colors, in a circle, each pointing outward, perpendicular to the handle itself.

It was, for all intents and purposes, an exact replica of her Sun Stick. A sea of goosebumps ran across his skin as he realized that particular thought was backwards. No, her staff was a replica of this one. It was in this glorious moment of clarity that the aroma of angelica hit Quintus fully. He tensed and Raphael noticed immediately.

"Is everything alright?" The violet-eyed angel began to ask before Michael spoke.

"The defendant is aware of the charges?" His voice was firm and loud.

Raphael stood, "Yes."

"And how does the defendant plead?"

"Innocent."

"So be it then." Michael bellowed, “Let it begin.”

[anlittlegay-blog]

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