#but no I chose the worst people as my blorbos

[optiwashere]

Needed to lay down and try to sleep for longer than an hour today, and in doing so I blearily looked at general fandom tags because I wanted to see silly fanart.

Instead I got hit full-force with reality of so much drama over the wildest little shit. I've been cursed with sight.

I have also never been happier to stay in my own bubble away from... all of that.

All that to say, I'm keeping this blog free of more stuff like this but holy fuck it hit me like a freight train. All this drama exhausts me and I don't know how anyone keeps up with it. I prefer to think of this place as the equivalent of a cabin in the woods, one where I emerge every few days with a few thousand words for people to devour with their eyes.

[olderthannetfic]

Nearly 75% of fic on AO3 has less than 5 reader comments. Can we please acknowledge that lack of engagement in a positive fashion is the norm in fandom and that writers are expected to work for nothing in return yet readers are allowed to be entitled?

The source of my number

https://www.tumblr.com/transholmes/738776926733336576/and-even-those-numbers-on-the-lower-end-are

--

Hahahahaha.

Oh, anon.

Okay, first of all, I just posted a bunch of graphs showing exactly this, so not only am I well aware of it, but you also clearly don't read my tumblr much and are just here because some friend of yours is upset that I responded negatively to them about their dumb bookmarking opinions.

Second and more importantly...

No, no one is expected to do anything.

That's crazypants influencer talk where you think your hobbies are jobs that you have no choice about doing.

I suppose I do expect fans to have something at least marginally worthwhile to say—or else I'll block them for being whiny little bitches who make my day dumber as well as less amusing.

But mostly, what I expect is that people will do hobbies because they are fun. If I ever decide that writing fic is too boring, I will stop.

I write because it's fun.

I write original work for money too, and if you want to read that, you're going to have to pay Amazon your cold, hard cash. But I still do it because I enjoy the actual act of writing... at least a lot of the time.

What I see in the bookmark boo-hooing is a bunch of people who haven't noticed the last eighty thousand rounds of this same dumb wank and who not only expect to get the last word but expect that somehow I'm going to signal boost it on my tumblr as that... a tumblr known for contentious debates and nobody ever getting the last word till everyone's exhausted and never wants to hear about paper plates or beans again.

I also see that some of the thinnest-skinned people have fic patreons.

Now, I chose not to bring this up before because it sounds a bit below the belt in that "And thus you're morally impure and thus I can ignore your argument" way... But it's a consistent pattern in these conversations over time, and I do think it's relevant. The biggest sensitive babies are always the ones most afraid of bad reviews but also low engagement, and I think it's because they're caught in some half-pro, half-not limbo where they want the best of both worlds but keep getting the worst of both.

If you behave like a professional who is owed compensation, you can expect a more professional style of response to your work.

And what does the pro world look like? Radio silence. The occasional harsh review. Nobody caring why you wanted to write X or why you couldn't finish Y on time.

If you're here to socialize, you should look for a beta or a couple of good friends who like your blorbos and your style of fic, and then you can squee together about what you've written. It may not come in the form of visible AO3 comments. It may be in private chat.

In some cases, it may just be friends you can talk to about your writing but who aren't actually going to read it. I have plenty of friends who read different things than what I write.

That's what socializing and hobbies look like, dude.

It's fine to point out that many writers do get discouraged by low comment counts and then stop, so if I, as a reader in a fandom, want more, it behooves me to befriend writers and make them feel good.

But at the same time, writers get discouraged or move on to the next fandom all the time for all kinds of reasons. If the critical mass and the zeitgeist aren't there, then they aren't.

Do your hobbies for reasons internal to you.

If the main point is external validation, get into BDSM and find someone excited to indulge your praise kink. It will work a lot better than chasing fame via art.

[mothmanssweetsucculentass]

BEN Drowned headcanons

Finally I’m getting around to posting my current standing BEN Drowned HCs! The ask I got a couple weeks ago definitely motivated me to finish this finally lmao.

Trigger warnings for: Mentions of death, manipulation, suicide, drowning, violence, and the general mature stuff you should expect from the adult side of the Creepypasta fandom. There are NO CENSORS BEYOND THIS POINT. Read at your own risk.

____________________________________________

ageless/has kinda always existed since the internet has been publicly accessible

It/it’s pronouns, occasionally caught using they/them and even rarer he/him

Manipulative as fuck

Malewhore mansplain manipulate

Literally makes up a huge chunk of its personality idk what to tell you

Will doxx you

No seriously if you catch its attention you’re getting stalked

Stalks potential victims through the internet

Finds potential victims on forums and the “dark web”

Often goes after people who are heavily depressed and/or suicidal

Thinks it’s funny telling people to off themselves

Like fr its favorite hobby is basically being an average redditor

Probably the WORST mf to date out of all of my interpretations of Creepypasta characters

Gives zero shits about anyone besides itself

Seriously it does not care about you Y/N RUN!!!!!

Lies lies lies omg loves lying so much

Lies to get what it wants

Master “hacker”

If it’s stalking you say goodbye to any and all digital important things you have

Say goodbye to your laptop too

And switch

And iPhone

It’s all getting bricked by BEN if it finds it funny to do so

And it probably will

You like sleep? Too bad

Woe, nightmares be upon ye

Gaslighting KING. Deletes messages between you and people in your life on purpose

Has extensive knowledge of internet culture and video games

Knows every meme ever

Has created most of the “video game” Creepypastas as their own personal “proxies”

Sonic.exe, Smile.jpeg, The Princess, etc, anything inhabiting digital media that torments people, BEN is the one behind it all

Finds friendships useless but respects Slenderman enough to continue being a proxy for it

Got bored of tormenting the other pastas pretty fast, generally avoids them unless slender tasks it with giving specific info pulled from the web to the other pastas (news articles, police reports, locations, etc)

Out of all my HC characters BEN is probably the most serious/grimdark/gritty, I prommy not all my blorbos are as mature and serious as BEN

Takes on the form of a late teenage boy’s body, waterlogged pale skin, constantly glitching and dripping water. Speaks in at least five different voices/tones at once, including robotic AI voices

Only physically manifests to scare the fuck out of people

Stans Hatsune Miku

SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER!

All these HCs are for BEN! Not Ben!!!!

Because after much deliberation I have decided that yeah I kinda do want some of the old BEN middle school me liked to fuck around with. So without further ado, here’s my Ben headcanons:

Created BEN as an AI program for when he can’t be at his computer

BEN is kinda like their “avatar” for the internet

He/they pronouns

Roughly about 20 years old, give or take a few years

Died in the mid 2000s in college

Went back home one weekend to pick up some furniture and whoopsies dad sacrificed me to the cult I tried to escape from

Obviously had a not so great home life. Chose the furthest college on purpose just to get away

His father never saw him as anything more than a bargaining chip and pawn for the cult of the moon children

The sacrifice and his death were what caused the mental split between himself and the AI

One half of him remained tethered to his physical corpse, the other half manifested itself as what is now the BEN AI

He can be in two places at once technically

He’s unsure if they count as two people or one. On the one hand, BEN is a manifestation of his apathy and agony from his death and did come from his own mind. On the other hand, BEN is able to function completely independently of Ben

After years of practice and honing their technical skills, Ben was able to fine tune the BEN AI into what it is today

I mean hell, the BEN AI wasn’t always this powerful and organized. The first few years after Ben’s death, he could barely get ahold of it

Sort of??? A ghost?? Like a fusion between a ghost and zombie

Like is obviously a corpse and can kinda go in and out of corporeal and non corporeal form

Has the skin tone and feel of a freshly drowned corpse, but isn’t constantly dripping water

Eyes constantly leak and drip with blood tho. Tissues are scattered all around his room with his futile attempts to keep the blood tears at bay. Face has a “pinker” color compared to the rest of his body thanks to how many times they’ve wiped and smeared the blood around

First they take your eyes, then they carve symbols you don’t understand into your flesh, and then they drown you. Smh

They’re much more faded now, but Ben has the scars of symbols the moon children cult used during his sacrifice

Similar in behavior/personality as BEN but toned way the fuck down

Like. Still enjoys tormenting people but can (sort of) empathize

Still an asshole tho

And a pervert

And a stoner

And a gamer

He’s a discord Reddit mod irl. Scummy guy tbh

Not afraid of water, just afraid of water damage on their equipment

Lives in the mansion basement

Hasn’t seen sunlight since 2004

Introverted as fuck

Prefers to be physically manifested, leaves all the digital movement to the BEN AI but can enter technology if need be

Cheats in any and all video games you play against him in. Hacker aficionado

Y’all know those fits people used to wear in the 2010s of like, cargo shorts and legend of Zelda t shirts? Almost exclusively his fashion sense

Like yeah he does have the link getup but finds it pretty tedious to get into

Does enjoy scene fashion quite a bit tho

And EDM

electronic stuff in general is his favorite shit ever

Him and the BEN AI never physically kill people, just manipulates them into offing themselves

He’s a weak motherfucker he physically cannot kill somebody

Emotionally tho he would mass murder if he could

The one thing him and Jeff can agree on

Bi, and aro. Kinda too horny and despondent to society to care for someone emotionally for more than twelve seconds

Could definitely stand to make a few friends though, and isn’t opposed to conversation if he ever leaves his gamer basement

Currently friends with EJ, Jane, Liu, Nina, and Helen

Has a tolerable relationship/mutual respect for Masky, Hoody, Jason, Puppeteer, and Slenderman

Doesn’t get along with/hates Jeff, LJ, and Clockwork

Sally sees him as an older brother figure. Unfortunately he’s a bad influence on the kid and also has no idea how to look after a child, he just kinda goes “fuck it we ball” anytime someone puts them in charge of Sally. Has taught her every swear and slur known to man. Thinks it’s hilarious to put her on the mic in gamer lobbies

“Hey dude check this out” proceeds to show you the nastiest shock video ever

Semi-fluent in Japanese despite being whiter than paper. Unsurprisingly a weeb

If he owns a body pillow he keeps it hidden with his life. They won’t be caught dead cuddling up to something like that at night

The mansion’s go to IT guy. Against his will but unfortunately if he wants to continue living in the mansion (or living in general) he has to take this role lest slenderman eviscerates him for defiance

Both him and the BEN AI have a major superiority complex, he thinks he’s way better than everyone else and is the cockiest bastard mf on the planet

Stans Hatsune Miku

[firedragon1321]

Corrupted DigiDestined AU

Aka- Another Digimon AU That's Me Just Spinning Gears and Playing With an Old Post

(This is not reboot continuity- I just needed a pretty picture.)

I've seen this concept done in three ways-

Outright turn the kids stereotypically evil. This works in the short term, but it's not good for character anaylsis/DigiDestined rotation. The "quick and dirty" option, basically.

Invert the Crests. So the Crest of Courage becomes the Crest of Fear. I found only one cool Tim Burton-esque art set that did this well. I can't find it now. But generally, I've never been satisfied with these. Especially because they have to work around the "Crest of Darkness" every goddamn time...

Work with the kids' weaknesses. So the Crest of Courage becomes the Crest of Recklessness. This is probably my favorite option.

I want to go more in-depth on the last one, and that's why we've gathered here today. Only instead of just working with the canon weaknesses...what if I tweaked the kids's pasts so their "worst event" never happened? What kind of people would they become?

Also alternate Digimon partners because wheeeee I like them.

(TW for mentions of abuse, manipulation, and hinted major character/child death.)

Tai- The Crest of Arrogance

Impmon-> Punkmon-> Loudmon-> HeavyMetaldramon

This was an easy one because he's my blorbo. The event I chose to erase was also an easy pick. What if Tai never brought Kari out to play soccer that day? I rotated this for a bit and concluded that the athletics aspect of his character would take over, making him a sort of asshole jock type.

Tai still possesses a natural charisma, leadership ability, and recklessness. But his rule is delivered with an iron fist. It doesn't matter if he's on the soccer pitch or in the Digital World. His rule is simply law. His leadership potential and cruelty are magnified to the point that even adults don't want to get on his bad side.

Tai's self-centered and not afraid to bash your face in if you disagree with him. Your name doesn't have to be "Matt" either. He thinks of himself as a great hero, and anyone who disagrees with him must be another antagonist there to ruin his day. But in reality, he's barely keeping the group together with glue made of terror.

Impmon may be a cliche choice, but I chose him for his Punkmon evolution line. They're still reptilian, while also being loud, belligerent, and always looking for a fight. I also just like HeavyMetaldramon in general. He's got a dumb name I can't help but love, plus he looks like another favorite who will come into play later.

Matt- The Crest of Manipulation

Gazimon-> Sangloupmon-> Astamon-> GranDracmon

Matt's "special event" was obvious, too. His parents never got divorced in this AU (an event that will come into play with TK too, naturally). Since this event controls a lot more of Matt's character than Tai's event, I had to think a minute for him. I decided to fuck with his sense of empathy and dub characterization. Because Matt can be as emotionally mature and sensitive as Sora, even if he can't always make that obvious.

So what if he used that trait for evil?

On the surface, Matt's the cool rebel of the group. His suave surface nature makes him easy to approach. One might even call him a friend, even if they know nothing about him. However, he knows how to play with feelings. Like any good instrument, you keep plucking strings until you get the result you and. And that's exactly how Matt views people. Before you can blink, he's got what he wanted and dumped you on the side of the road.

Astamon and GranDracmon are both smooth-talking demon Digimon. Astamon attracts a lot of followers, while GranDracmon can talk any angel Digimon into "falling down". I figured they'd be a perfect fit (though I was admittedly thinking of the Astamon from Young Hunters). Gazimon and Sangloupmon kept the canine theme without being Gabumon recolors.

(Fun fact- I've used this line before for an OC, but that character was (in the end) benign.)

Sora- The Crest of Ambition

Dracumon-> BlackGatomon-> Bastemon-> Lilithmon

It would have been easy to make Sora the emotional manipulator. Too easy. And it wouldn't have anything to do with her issue- namely, her controlling mother. But what if her mother was a little more lax? No- MORE lax than that. What if she supported her daughter no matter what- even if those ambitions skewed too extreme?

Woe be to anyone who gets in this Sora's way. It doesn't matter what she has her eye on. She'll get it, and she'll gladly step on you if you get in the way. She's never heard "no" before, and has no time or desire to hear it from you.

Her Crest of Love has become a type of Lust, but not in the sexual sense. It's desire. Passion. It's never-ending want. The cup is never full for Sora. There's still more drink to be had. There will never be enough.

I worked my way backwards from Lilithmon, choosing Digimon with mind control abilities and ambitious personalities. This means we get a recolor of Gatomon- despite my efforts to avoid recolors of the canon crew- but oh well.

Joe- The Crest of Sloth

Phascomon-> Porcupamon-> Mephismon-> Belphemon

Joe's "problem" in Adventure is also heavy expectations, much like Sora. Taking them away could result in an overly ambitious character. But for Joe, I went the opposite direction. What if he was a person with no ambitions at all?

Paralyzed by his own fears and no goal in life, Joe is more follower than leader. He carries out orders without a thought to his own life or safety, because he believes his life to be meaningless. With certain people in this corrupted crew, however, that means he's carrying out plenty of evil deeds. He's not necessarily evil himself, however- just without direction.

I worked my way back from a Demon Lord again- this time Belphemon. He's naturally the Demon Lord of Sloth (for those who don't live in the Digital World inside their minds). I chose Mephismon just to connect the Champion to the Mega, and also because he's a demonic Digimon.

And that's about it for Joe. I wish I could do more, but it's hard to add personality to a character with no goals.

Mimi- The Crest of Selfishness

Aruraumon-> Zassomon-> Blossomon-> Rafflesimon

Otamamon->ShogunGekomon (warp)

Mimi doesn't have family issues like the rest of the cast. The problem is she's spoiled. So instead of erasing her backstory, I decided to erase her character development. Certain events like Sora convincing her to leave the Gekomon don't happen in this timeline. They can't, after all, with how different everyone else is.

This results in a Mimi who only acts in her own self interest. Maybe not at first. Maybe she thinks the others are pure evil. But that changes. Thanks to the attention lavished upon her by the Otamamon and Gekomon, she's essentially Princess Mimi full time. Woe be to the poor idiot who gets under her high heels!

I decided to go with recolors for this line just because it made more sense to corrupt Palmon than to invent a new partner. Perhaps Mimi was originally a "pure" force introduced to keep the others in line. But her own flaws were waiting to consume her...

Also- similar to how Leomon was able to digivolve thanks to Tai's Digivice, one of the Otamamon gained the same power from Mimi's. That's why she has two Digimon. And you can bet others like Chuumon/Sukamon, the Numemon, and more follow the army of Princess Mimi.

Izzy- The Crest of Intellect

Hagurumon-> Mekanorimon-> Vademon-> EBEmon

I know what you're thinking- I'm a lazy-ass and replaced "Knowledge" with a synonym. And you're right! But with the event I removed being Izzy's knowledge of his adoption, his intelligence didn't go away. Instead of retreating, he expanded outwards. Think Ken when he was roleplaying the Digimon Emperor, but with no Wormmon to hold him back.

Izzy is smarter than you and he knows it. Similar to Matt, he's outplayed you before you can even say hello. He doesn't have Matt's charm, but he doesn't need it. You're too stupid to counteract him, anyway. He can hack your systems before you've realized a single thing amiss. Maybe he'll even let you believe things are fine for a day or two...

Like Sora and Mimi, he hasn't encountered any problems. A snag in Izzy's plans is always temporary. But hit him in his unstable emotional core, and you may have a chance of saving your laptop. But the resulting revenge is bound to be devastating....

I was going to do a full machine Digimon line, but then veered into Vademon. The big brain design caught my attention. Also, since regular Izzy had troubles with a Vademon, having his dark half master this Digimon has interesting implications for my brain.

TK- The Crest of Terror

DemiDevimon-> Devidramon->DexDoruGreymon-> Megidramon

Remember how I cut the divorce from canon? This means TK grew up with Matt, who- in this timeline- is an emotional abuser. And of course, his favorite target is his doting little brother, who will do anything he says.

Like Joe, TK's not evil. He just lives in a constant state of fear. He'll apologize as his Digimon tears you into bite-sized pieces- all while proclaiming his love for his brother. Whether Matt tells him to act as a distraction or kill, it doesn't matter. He'll do it, knowing he'll get no reward.

But TK wants a reward. Matt's his whole world. It's always been that way. Unfortunately he sees no other existence. Without Matt, he simply doesn't exist.

Megidramon is one of my favorite Digimon, so I had to squeeze him in somehow. I like to think TK's partner is a manifestation of his true feelings. Though he loves his brother, he's also disgusted by him. If given the slightest bit of leash, he'd turn the monster loose on Matt- and regret it for the rest of his life.

(And yes- a DemiDevimon did mess with TK in canon...convincing him his brother didn't love him...it's only a matter of time...)

Kari- The Crest of Despair

Salamon-> Meicoomon->Meicrackmon Vicious Mode-> Mastemon

Despair is kind of similar to Darkness, and I've seen it used on a few of these sorts of things. But it's not like "the opposite of Light is Darkness" because it's an actual character trait. And it's a direction Kari could go without her brother's love to support her.

Kari's in a similar boat as TK. She's lived her whole life with a bastard of a brother. But she also has a host of illnesses. Just once, she'd love her brother to visit her in the hospital. But he never came. Soccer was a useful excuse, or else his parents were too scared to command him.

Now, they're trapped in the Digital World together, and it's no secret that Kari's the chain around Tai's ankle. He certainly hasn't kept that information from her, finally losing his patience when she falls ill in Machinedramon's territory. She always held on to hope that he was a good big brother deep down. Now proven wrong, she's in a vegetative state of despair.

Like with Mimi, I just corrupted Gatomon instead of making a new character. But I started from her Rookie stage of Salamon. We're gonna pretend tri. never happened for this. As for Mastemon? Gatomon DID reach her Angewomon stage, and that data still exists within her. But it mixed with the dark despair created by her partner. Instead of falling entirely, she became a deadly being that exists between light and darkness.

Odds and Ends

This ramble does imply that evil Digimon like Myotismon were still killed. This was not out of charity. They simply got in the way and were disposed of.

The Digital World still chose the kids during the Greymon/Parrotmon fight, when they were young and innocent, having no idea what would happen in the future. Mimi was the OG damage control, with a pure and sincere nature that might be able to purify the others.

When Mimi failed, Kari's shining light had to take over. It worked for a little while- mostly for TK and Joe, who are not malicious.

When Tai polished off Kari's light, TK finally snapped. His Megidramon responded to his anger, attempting to destroy Tai. This Digimon ran into a blockade in the form of HeavyMetaldramon. Not sure which of the two would win this fight, but it would be cool at least. The loser probably wouldn't make it out alive, though...

As previously mentioned, tri didn't happen. 02 still could, with Davis/Cody/Yolei/non-evil Ken being the third attempt to keep these damn kids in line. Maybe they receive help from TK, Joe, and what's left of Kari. But that's an AU within an AU and I'm already tired.

Mimi never returned to the Real World when the castle has all she wants. She mostly operates from there, keeping in touch with the others via Digimon like Soundbirdmon.

That's about it. You can play around with this if you want. Just shoot me a credit/link so I can see what you did. I made this while half-awake at 10 PM so it's just a lot of bullshit, anyway.

[angelsdean]

thinking abt this ask some more and well, it also all boils down to dean is not john because dean is not john.

dean is his own person with different life experiences and trauma and morals and agency. yes dean learned and internalized some things from john but dean literally IS NOT john. he's dean. and crucially he is a victim of john, who was Thee angry man in the house.

john is the first person he learned pain and shame and anger and self-hatred from. and dean has not been able to properly unpack or cope with those early experiences or any of the other traumatic events that follow. for nearly 40 years. PLUS 40 years of hell trauma. and still !! still !! dean tries to do better. he apologizes and he expresses his regret for past actions and even his worst actions are rooted in love and a need to protect. he most often acts out of fear, worry, and/or grief. as cas said, the good and the bad, everything he has done has been for love. he fears jack and is angry at jack during widowers arc because he loved cas so much and does not yet know jack is good and can be trusted. his reaction is understandable. we as the audience see and receive more information than the characters. but based on what dean himself knows at the time, dean has every right to be fearful and wary.

but anyways. back to dean and john. widower's arc IS meant to draw that parallel between them. we're supposed to see dean echoing john. we're supposed to feel john's ghost acting through dean. but we are also meant to see where they diverge. dean does not become obsessed with revenge. he does not go on a quest to get cas back (despite how much he wants him back) and abandon everyone else. he even starts to come around to jack, even before cas gets back.

then, there's john and his own complicated trauma. and i do feel some empathy and sadness for him. but his trauma is notably different from dean's, and that's why dean garners more of my empathy, compassion, and forgiveness.

john felt abandoned after his father's disappearance and then internalizes those abandonment issues and those unresolved feelings fester into anger. then john enlists illegally in the military chasing his father's ghost. in the military he experiences more trauma. but he did choose to go into the military. it's different from dean being forced to be a soldier and weapon for his father from a young age. john was 17 ? when he enlisted and did so of his own free will (as much free will as you can have being one of chuck's blorbos but still, you get what i'm saying), while dean never had a choice, and by the time he had the choice to leave he'd already been guilt tripped into staying by john and also had very few connections outside of the winchester family unit. IF dean were to leave john (after sam left) he'd be largely alone because john never let them forge connections and relationships. john purposely kept them isolated from others. finally, john loses mary which exacerbates his preexisting issues, anger, and trauma. losing mary was not the catalyst that turned john "bad" it was just an accelerator added to the fire that had been slow-burning for years.

so yes, both john and dean have abandonment issues regarding their fathers, except john's are based on a perceived abandonment that he lets become a deep anger and propel his actions re: joining the military. whereas dean is literally abandoned and neglected repeatedly and often throughout his childhood which leads to a lot of unresolved fear and anxiety regarding losing people and people leaving him. cas dying during widower's arc and losing mary at the same time too (and crowley!) definitely triggers those deep seated fears and anxieties. dean also just has trauma surrounding death bc of mary. dean, like john, also has trauma surrounding being a soldier and having to kill people. however, john chose that path (and then later chose hunting) while dean had that life thrust upon him. (the first time he's handed a gun he is six years old and his father believes he somehow has a "killer instinct").

finally, dean, like john, loses cas who is yes mary-coded during widower's arc and he is left with a child. however, unlike john, this child is also an extremely powerful being whom dean knows nothing about except the fact that he is the biological son of lucifer. he also believes jack manipulated cas and got him killed. people will parallel jack to sam in this instance but john likely had no idea sam was infected with demon blood until much later after years of research and following azazel's trail. so early on, john's neglect and mistreatment of sam and dean cannot be blamed on john being afraid of sam or something like that. john IS afraid of the world though. he's paranoid as all heck and that fuels a lot of his actions. but dean is not wrong in this case for being wary of jack. he has every right to be afraid, it's just that his fear, coupled with grief, ends up being expressed as anger. the same may be true for john in those early years, but eventually, john lets his anger and need for vengeance consume him and he prioritizes the hunt over his children. as he says in 1x22, "killing this demon comes first. before everything." dean wants cas and mary and crowley back, but he doesn't put it before everything. he doesn't turn away from sam or jack to pursue that quest. in fact, it is sam who becomes obsessed during this arc with the quest of getting mary back to the point of using jack and training him specifically for that purpose.

dean is not john because dean is dean. he doesn't see the world as black and white as john did. he still has fears and trauma that when triggered often come out as anger. but anger is not his norm, it is a trauma response. most often, he wants to do good and help people. he cares about his family and wants them to be safe and alive. his fears may inform some of his actions and decisions, but his actions are always rooted in love and care. cas saw him as a being of love. as more than what john tried to make him. more than a blunt instrument. more than a weapon for heaven and hell. more than chuck's favorite toy. dean is dean. and that's why cas loves him. and that's why *i* love him.

[simplyender]

You have a way of finding sympathetic/kind of pathetic antagonists that are clearly neurodivergent and if given the chance, would totally be better people but never really got that chance

Fern and Hordak and Spot

[Identify my Blorbos!] (putting this at the top bc I made a really long post lol)

Anyway,

[Incorrect buzzer]

You were pretty close there till you said all of these guys would totally be better people but never were given the chance, especially when you said spto Gideon Graves. My man was SO down to do evil. At his best he's harmless and pathetic. But the dude still is pretty pro-doing-terrible-things, even if its not to Scott and Ramona in specific. Could he improve? Sure! But I'm of the belief that anyone can. It sucks that he wasn't treated nicely as a teenager but like. Dude, get help. You clearly can afford it. You just don't want it/don't think you need it.

Gideon actively chose to become the CEO of G-man records and he chose to use his vast power to make a girls life a living hell purely because he felt ENTITLED to her and her love. That's fucked up!!!! Hes' a sick shit in all versions and I truly do love him for that. He and Julie really are bitch x bastard! <3

Fern and Spot both are interesting ones, as they're both cases of "they made their own choices", only, the Finn part of Fern was doing something good (reviving Prismo), he just didn't know that meant he'd become the Finnsword, and the Emissary from Beyond is....Complicated.

Spot, however...

....Look, we can theorize as much as we want about his hypothetical past and what drove him to do it (bc I doubt anybody that works at Alchemax is fully stable), but before all this shit happened to him, he CHOSE to work at Alchemax, which was a morally dubious decision at BEST. I don't think he had bad intention in the slightest however, it's just that Spot....Seems to have a bad habit of not really caring about anything else that's going on around him as long as he's getting what he wants. Negligent is the word (Funny, considering that's what he accuses Spider-Man of being). Also nobody made him go back for the dark matter, and he could have evacuated like everybody else*

Either way, both Fern and Spots actions definitely come from a place of desperation and severe emotional distress. And they're both guys that really lost their entire lives due to something out of their control**, and just weere driven to go....Way too far. They also actively decided to be bad guys because villainy provided them with the validation they needed. Hopefully Spot won't get killed off in the end like Fern did. Haha!

Hordak is definitely what you described though, because we were literally SHOWN that through the existence of Wrong Hordak! He's from a cult and heavily indocrinated with horrible beliefs that he deeply internalized, especially because of his relationship with his disability and the way Horde Prime viewed him for it. This is also seen through Entrapta, who....Yes, helped him do evil thing too. But they were adorable. And ultimately, it was her that helped him realize his worth as a person and take the step towards good (although that was a personhood thing, not a redemption arc, lol). But through proper support, Wrong Hordak was able to grow and develop in a way that Hordak just wasn't given the opportunity to, so....Yeah.

Hordak never got the chance, and Fern kept getting screwed over by the universe and his own low self esteem. But Spot made his own choices in life. He is absolutely the most selfish person out of the three.

And also. Is, yknow, the most experienced in life/an adult. (I already talked about Gideon who is the worst but like I said he doesn't even come close). Yes what happened to him was horrible, yes he didn't deserve so much mistreatment for it, but still. The chain of events started because of his own decisions until it spiralled out of his control, from where he doubled down for a variety of reasons indicating that he really needs the intervention of a trained mental health professional.

I think I went way off course here.

Sorry. Haha.

* Yes it's likely that he felt like he had to go back and save the remains of his work, might have something to do with Olivia stealing all the credit for the collider and his desperate need to be recognized. Still a bad idea though.

** Spot may have done the physical aspects of his life going to shit to himself but I'm not blaming him for the way other people treat him for what is now out of his control. It's not like he asked to be what he is, or to be mocked and lose his livelihood for it.

You get a 1.3/4 because the description is correct up to a point but it entirely fits Hordak.

SO close!

[thesweetnessofspring]

Why don't you like swift? Is it her specifically?

I love how making tags in one random post has gotten me this ask, because like, in general my stance is to ignore her and not talk about it, use my tumblr filters and whatnot to ignore her existence the best I can. But I'm getting asked so here's my answer. I'm going fully honest with this because someone asked me to, so if this pop star is your idol, ignore this and dni. It's just my opinion and arguing with me will only entrench my hatred deeper, as evidenced by my past experience with her fans. Also this is hella long, so fair warning.

There are a lot of reasons why I hate that singer. Some range from my own adolescent dramatics to bad interactions with her fans to just really not being into celebrity culture and therefore her whole persona/existence. I also want to say that everything I know about Swift I've learned against my will, so some of this information may be incomplete, but I don't feel the need to look up details about her. If I could, I would never have to hear about her or her music ever again.

I don't like her music. I actually really despise it and have since she got popular when I was in high school. Now I've come to realize if I hate a piece of media, it usually either did an injustice to something I love (like the Ella Enchanted movie) or it's something I didn't like but it became inescapable. Swift mostly falls into the latter. I know people have been trying to take back "cringe" but I can't help it. When I have to hear Swift's music, I CRINGE and I have since high school. Love Story was the stupidest """story""" to me with huge plotholes. You Belong With Me was incredibly entitled and I still side with cheerleader girl in that one, like that is HER boyfriend who HE chose to date. In general, all of her music (that I heard) in those early years were girl-crying-over-useless-boy and that annoyed me to the high heavens. And I think my dislike turned to hatred when I was told that since I was a girl, I HAD to like her, that she was SOOOOO relatable to teenage girls when my life experience was nothing like hers. And her music being all over the radio, school, my social settings, etc. did not help.

And the thing is, I've heard songs/seen lyrics of hers that I didn't know were hers and I still hated them/thought they were cringe. Like I remember when "We Are Never Getting Back Together" came out. I heard it on the radio and thought "who is this new wanna-be Avril Lavigne?? She sucks!" And then the DJ said it was Swift's new song. 💀 A few months ago I was driving my parents to the airport with their car and a song comes on their radio I hadn't heard before, and I immediately think "ugh this song sucks" and then by the chorus I realized it was a Swift song. Even with her new album, when I saw the first meme for that "you wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me" I thought it was an old meme I'd missed and had originated from like, some cringey 12-year-old on Vine or something. Only to find out a grown-ass woman in her 30s who's likely never stepped foot in a psychiatric unit wrote it, which explained how utterly stupid that line is. All of that to say, even when blind, I hate her music. The one (1) exception to that is Blank Space. That one for some reason, I do find catchy. My obsessed cousin got me to listen to Folklore and I didn't HATE that, but I thought it was hella boring. She's either cringe or boring and mediocre and I think at this point, you have to be a fan of her persona to like her music because that's really all I hear her fans talk about. Not the songs themselves, but how they're about her/her life. Or their blorbos.

I think Swift is a spoiled, entitled, privileged white girl who likes to bask in any slight done to her and blow it up like it's the worst injustice done to any human being. She lacks a true core other than being obsessed with herself, her image, and her fame, and chases trending aesthetics instead of finding something real and authentic to her. Authenticity is really important to me. I really can enjoy things other people think of a "cringey" if it's authentic to the creator, but the only thing authentic to Swift is her martyr complex. She borrows aethetics and throws them off easily, never truly mastering any of the genres she stumbles into as a costume instead of an authentic artistic expression. Everything she does is half-baked.

And that's not to say that the press and people online haven't been nasty. That stuff with the deepfake AI rape-porn was horrendous and she doesn't deserve that. Nor did her body being scrutinized as a teenager (or ever). But she got offended by a TV show joking about her having had a lot of boyfriends (which is true!) and as a result, a black actress who was delivering the lines someone else wrote got harassed online. Like what an absolute LOSER. She's a billionaire and the most popular pop star currently alive, and some rando Netflix show has her panties in a twist to the point where she sics her stans to bully an actress??

I'll give Swift this: she is very good at parasocial relationships (to an exploitive degree, imo) and PR. She's turned feminism into her own "you're misogynist if you attack ME!!!!! Like who cares about poor women or women in countries that mine has colonized or abused women or exploited women, anyone who attacks MEEEEE is the worst misogynist around!!!!!" Ugh. And I'm not going to lie, when 1989 came out and I was getting more into feminism I fell for this narrative of hers until her "Bad Blood" music video came out and it struck me how she was a bully. From what I heard, the beef was that Katy Perry "stole" her dancers and TS responded by making a whole music video with some of the biggest female celebrities to show off how everyone was in her corner. Then I thought...oh...she literally doesn't care about feminism (blatantly attacking another woman for something really minor) she only cares about herself!! And I got on the hate-train again. I still think she uses her power to bully other people/keep them in line about her and I swear if I were a man in Hollywood/entertainment, I would never date that woman.

She's certainly not the worst celebrity around. And also, I think to some extent, celebrities who have achieved even half the fame Swift has is likely somewhat conceited and self-centered. Anyone I'm a fan of, I'm a fan of their work first, and if they seem nice then that's a plus, but I also don't bank of them to be perfect, as long as they don't cross over into abusing others. And I don't think (from what I've been forced to know) that Swift is an abuser. Swift reminds me more of that friend-of-a-friend that makes every gathering about her and is fake-nice to you to gather information about you so she can hold it over you socially. If that makes sense.

And also some of her fans have always just been really pushy and annoying. I'm not going to act like I never threw a little temper tantrum in high school when Love Story came on or anything, but I've had my fair share of her fans as roommates and friends and I've really tried to be polite with them a least since college when I'd gotten a little more mature. Two stories really did me in, though: once in college I went on a roadtrip with a friend. We were going to be going through an area with bad radio signals and when that happened we got out the CDs. She suggested the Red album. I politely said I didn't care for Swift, and pointed out another one of her CDs of band I did like. She told me I didn't like Swift because I only heard her stuff on the radio, reached over while she was driving and pulled out the CD and put it in. I didn't want to start some sort of fight trying to get the CD out while she was driving and had to listen to that CD. This friend was trying really hard to get me to like her, but I was just so pissed she hadn't listened to me and I was trapped in there. Halfway through I asked to change it, thinking okay, it's been like 20 minutes, but no, she insisted I'd like the songs in the last half (I didn't, obviously). I also in college had my "golden" birthday and decided to throw a huge party. My roommates and one of our joint friends at the time were big into Swift. They were helping me put it together and I asked that the music they play not be a) violent toward women or b) any of Swift's music. They got the first part but then put all of the "danceable" songs of her newest album at the time on my birthday playlist. Like, not one song. At least five songs. Because they wanted it. All of the other parties and gatherings I clenched my teeth and told myself to get through it, but seriously, my own birthday party they ignored my very simple request because "it's not a party without Taylor!" I literally left my own party until the songs switched. And when I asked them to take any other of her songs off, they didn't. So. Yeah. Even though that was over a decade ago now, it doesn't help my Pavlovian response to her songs or her voice.

I just really don't think she's talented at singing, dancing, acting, or songwriting and seeing all of her everywhere is just SO MUCH.

[limerental]

I recently got back into witcher brain rot but all the tags are filled with people saying how shit the show is and how Cavil leaving is the end times cause he was apprantly the only thing keeping together the entire story where he is present for like 30% of the time, And its legitimately making me question my sanity. Like im fine with being obsessed with media thats objectively shit, hell most of my favs are absolute trash, but like TWN isnt perfect by any means but its not that bad right? Has all my media literacy gone out the window? Am i wrong for thinking this show is objectively good to peak mid? I feel like I'm losing my mind.

Yeah, it's a little goofy silly that it seems like so many folks have forgot concepts like

a) enjoying questionably good sometimes bad sometimes good media mostly for the community that can build up around that media (see: spn)

and b) not posting constant hate within the tags of the thing you now hate

Personally, I came to the Witcher universe through the show and came to enjoy several show-only elements of the universe, even though I enjoyed and prefer the story of the books. I wouldn't prefer a book accurate Dandelion or Fringilla or even Yennefer. I've gotten attached to the ways that TWN expanded or changed several character choices I disliked from the books.

Because frankly. The books are great! They're also occasionally the worst. They're not some literary marvel of the ages. They're good books! Entertaining! Have some deeply interesting characters and commentary and are very, darkly funny and are my favorite books, but there are sure as hell things I would change if I were to adapt them.

That's not to say I would adapt them anything close to the way TWN chose to lol but it's just a little absurd and telling to me that so, so many people seem deeply invested in a book series (or at least in the idea of their fave meathead actor liking a book series) that they rarely seem to have anything to say about except in the context of bashing the show

Anyway sorry, tangent lol personally I loathe the witcher netflix and also, I enjoy it dearly. I'll be as grouchy as anybody when they do some questionable shit to my book blorbos and situations, but I'll still be having a good time because I choose to.

The only thing that's really ruined my enjoyment of the fandom has been people with constant bad faith takes, zero media literacy, and people slurping at hcav's boots

[luvmagician]

Ok, I'll be the one, Fubuki!!

you didnt say which number so i answered all 30 of them

1. My first impression of them

me and GX really had an enemies to lovers arc i could barely sit through the first episode after finishing DM the guitar stings were too much. i did not care much for any of the characters. it grew on me though we are besties now obvs

2. When I think I truly started to like them (or dislike them, if you've sent me a character I don't like)

i think i realized how much i liked S1 nightshroud first bc i love campy and ostentatious femme villains and then my love spread to regular fubuki around the time i got to s4 and then he graduated to a proper Blorbo and well the rest is history…

3. A song that reminds me of them

go fish by cub (ask me no more questions / ill tell you no more lies / about my sweet little trip to the other side) also obligatory fubuki playlist link

4. How many people I ship them with

off the top of my head 4 (ryo yusuke reggie manga!jim) but my interpretations tend to stretch the definition of “ship”

5. My favorite ship of them

idols hehe ^_^ lh4wds couple (lighthouse 4 wine dark sea)

6. My least favorite ship of them

theres not any i particularly dislike to be honest. hes a charismatic guy.

7. A quote of them that you remember

WHEN STAGE LIGHT HITS YOU THAT WHICH IS BEHIND YOU IS SACRIFICED TO SHADOW ! 🌟

8. Your favorite outfit of them

first i have to come out as an turn 60 austin powers cosplay enjoyer so sue me the purple looks nice on him secondly HIS LADY OSCAR OUTFIT!!! I WISH I COULD PICK THE BRAIN OF THE ANIMATOR WHO PUT HIM IN HER OUTFIT SOOO BAD ITS EVERYTHING TO ME

9. Your least favorite outfit of them

nightshroud outift but only when its lit by cool lighting and looks gray thats when its ugly when its lit warm and looks brown its flattering!! see theres a stark difference here!!

10. Describe the character in one sentence

11. What's the first thing you think about when thinking about the character?

“BUKI!!! :)” <- too happy to formulate coherent thoughts

12. Sexuality hc!

little bisexual weirdo

13. Your favorite friendship they have

manjoume and him are so sweet and funny thats his little guy. thats the chihuahua to his valley girl

14. Best storyline they had

season 4 makes me screammm its about absence as a presence its about how running from something only gives it more power over you its about confronting the horrors and chosing to live with them instead of dying to escape them…

15. Worst storyline they had

the jokes around his treatment of asuka in the show proper arent Great but i have a thick enough skin to slough through it… that being said the flanderization he endures in the spinoff games especially cross duel SUUCCKKK the “trying to marry off my bitch sister” jokes werent funny in 2004 they arent funny now STOP TRYING TO BRING THEM BACK. even more of a bummer bc i think his love for love and romance are such endearing parts of his character seeing them flattened down into bad jokes makes me -___-

16. childhood headcanon

regularly held concerts for an audience of his stufffed animals drew flyers to hand out and everything it was a whole production.

17. What do you think their first word was?

he needs attention. something attention grabbing like “HI” or “HEY!” or “ME!” something like that

18. How do you think they were as a kid? (Like, were they shy, noisy, wild, etc)

he was just as outgoing and chipper but also.. yk he was an emotional feminine kid with long hair who didnt like conflict and kids are mean.. but i think asuka looked out for him a lot and beat up his bullies

19. The most random ship you've seen people have with them

fubuki/shoji (manjoumes older brother) is so funny. i love it btw i think its such a serve and there are interesting ways you can spin it like yess fubuki chase the childhood you barely got to live by hooking up with a man who looks eerily like your highschool protege and maybe gold dig while your at it

20. A weird headcanon

i think him and asuka grew up in the middle of bumfuck nowhere (nowhere near the ocean he just picked up surfing really fast his freshman year) and them and the marufujis have a lil country mouse city mouse thing going on. and i draw him with rubber bands on his fingers to help with his memory issues :)

21. When do you think they were at their happiest?

freshman year of duel academy he was on top of da world baby

22. When do you think they were at their lowest?

the almost two years he spent in the nihilism nightmare depression hell dimension or the day he found out Prince died

23. Future headcanon

he does acting and entertainment dueling and shows up on variety shows and keeps teasing his album but refuses to release it until he he can get asuka to feature on a song. if he did ever release music all his music videos concepts would have a rich interlocking story ala the loonaverse

24. What do you think is a secret they have that they never told anyone?

he dodges questions about the darkness BIG TIME and even lies about like the time he lies to judais face about how oh im fine :) the darkness isnt in me anymore :) he really doesnt want to worry people i think he goes to his grave with just how much his time there sucked and how he suffered afterward. i dont think he would ever tell ryo or asuka how bad it really was

25. When do you think they acted the most ooc

this is hard hes on screen like 4 times

26. When do you think they were being "themselves" the most?

fubuki is always himself even at the absolute height of his performance and apparent detachment from reality because the act of performance is so baked into his character he would not be truly “himself” without it. he is both the mask and the wearer.

27. If they could meet a character from another show/movie/etc, who would be the most fun for them to meet?

HE SHOULD MEET JOEYYY i think joey wheeler is his personal hero… also him and ryan akagi from infinity train book 4 could absolutely kick it. two dudes who want to become rock stars and were trapped in hell/purgatory for a while

28. The most unnecessary thing they ever did?

the pensive ukulele strumming to punctuate his revenge monologue to kagemaru

29. How do you think they would be as a parent? (and if they are a parent, how do you think they would be if they weren't?)

I THINK HED BE A GREAT PARENT !!! a bit overbearing and doting but only bc he loves so so much.. hed be so good with young kids until they grow into teens and realize hes cringe

30. The funniest scene they had?

gotta be dropping down from the ceiling to call gay people “taboo and thrilling” and his sister homophobic

if you made it this far.. thank you for indulging my craziness 💖

[mrslittletall]

Choosing violence maybe for 13 and 25? For whichever fandom you have something to say about

I chose violence

13. worst blorboficiation Oh, how fun! I think we could do this for almost every listed fandom ^^ In Dark Souls it is probably Gwyndolin and I have to admit, I am not completely free of guilt of this, but I still fully lean into them having daddy issues and wanting the cycle to continue, I just portray them a bit more sympatethic in the matter, as feeling as if this is the only choice, what they were raised for etc etc. But I also see people write Gwyndolin as this innocent baby angel and not as the last child of Gwyn who is kinda behind the plot of the first Dark Souls. There is some pride in Gwyndolin and we should portray them accurately. Or not. Do what you guys want ^^ I just wanted to point stuff out. Hmmm, in Bloodborne... probably Micolash. I see a lot of people kinda... not leaning into Micolash being batshit insane. If you now point at me and say "Little, your Micolash is a quirky shameless innocent boy", that is Byrgenwerth era Micolash who is like 15 years old and hasn't even thought about the atrocities he will commit! I swear, if I would write canon Micolash, he would be a LOT different. I actually should write him. I never tried and he is so interesting! For Hollow Knight it is Grimm imo. He gets flanderized a lot. He is either the gay uncle or ship material but rarely, very rarely is he the Higher Being he is in canon. I admit I write Grimm as a major troll in my own fic, Off Balance, but he still is a god in this, following his own plan from the start. He never agreed to help PK from the good of his heart and while his plan is ultimately for the sake of another one, I still think I did him justice. I hope ^^ Elden Ring. I don't even have to think about it. Mohg and Morgott! Mohg oftentimes feels like his canon gets completely ignored and shoved under the rug (and if you do this, fine, I get the character makes people uncomfy). But I think Morgott is even worse. Yes, I like Morgott as well and I lean fully into his whole self hating and learning to love himself fanon, but... guys, sometimes I feel you forgot that he canonically killed dozens and dozens of Tarnished, had an order under his command that hunted Tarnished and pretty much is NOT a friend to your Tarnished in canon at ALL. Please, lean more into Morgott that is so into the grip of the Golden Order if you try to write him in canon. Okay and now I probably upset a lot of people. These are just my own opinions. You can blorbofy your blorbos as much as you want. I won't and can't stop you. I might just not read your fic or your comic, that is all. Alright, nobody is offended here, right? I am sure guilty of my own blorbofications ^^

25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing Hmmmm... good question. I rarely look at complaints and when it comes to Dark Souls, it isn't a fandom complaint I am sick of hearing, but the "easy mode" crowd. I am not even AGAINST easy modes, but Dark Souls difficulty is so much ingrained into the lore that taking it away would be a really big detriment to the game. For Bloodborne it is easy. Gehrman haters. Please, leave the old man in peace. He chose a fucked up way to grieve someone that he either loved romantically or as a daughter. Canon never does say that he did anything to the doll! If all, the lore implies that he mostly ignores her. Hollow Knight. That PK and Radi are colonizers. Where does that idea even come from?! If you follow the lore, Radi was there first and then PK came and then they had a battle about followers. It wasn't even a bloody battle, nowhere in the lore does it say that countless bugs died or such, it was more so that PK managed to gain more followers and that led to the whole disaster. What they are both guilty of is supressing the void culture, I suppose, but there was also no mention of killing. The whole killing only happened once the infection came into place. Elden Ring. That is also a no-brainer. The whole people who are denying that Mohg is romantically involved with Miquella. If you see it as consentual or non-consentual, Mohg is completely infatuated with Miquella. Nobody who would want to have power would cradle a hand like that and speak that softly. Okay, I think I talked enough ^^ Again, these opinions are my own. If you don't agree with them, that is fine. I am not mad at you. You have a right to have your own opinions and headcanons, even though I don't agree with them.

[quinloki]

I am loving seeing everyone's self-ship asks on your blog today! We're all down so bad for our blorbos, it's lovely <3

That being said, you know why I'm here--that Hedonistic Peacock™ has taken up residence in my brain and won't leave, and there are feathers everywhere. I think I have fallen down the rabbit hole (flamingo-hole? no...no that's not right at all) with Doffy so hard precisely because he's not like characters I normally simp for. IRL, I am a carer. I've been (correctly) accused of being a mellower Baby 5, I need people to need me to feel validated, and usually fall for anime dudes who clearly need/deserve someone to keep them happy and healthy to some degree--Spike Spiegel (the OG blorbo), Law, Zoro.

But Doflamingo? He doesn't need me. He has anything he needs and wants, even if it comes with a price. So feeling chosen by someone who wants for nothing, who could have anything he desired and still chose my devil fruit-less self because of...whatever reasons? I'm into it. There's also something attractive to me about the idea that, cliche as it is, I could make him "better" and he could make me considerably worse. It's appealing that there could be someone who doesn't necessarily want to help me work on fixing my character flaws, but instead encourages and revels in my very worst behaviors and still adores me anyway.

Thanks for listening to me therapize myself via blorbos XD

Lo. My sweet friend. We daydream about this man for similar - but different reasons (also I have been living on your head canon posts today, THANK YOU).

I love the idea of being able to just be Evil by being with him. Maybe I have a hidden dark, cruel streak, and there's a chance he could bring it out.

Crocodile would never allow it - little treasure, for him to protect and desire on his own, wouldn't let me be corrupted by his business, but Doflamingo would.

And I worry I'd almost become crueler.

So, to say, I get it. Let me revel in the dark depths I would never consider in truth. Let me give in the base desires that claw at the back of my mind - or something. But yes! Yes! Maybe the only reason he even has for being interested is because you are a good person.

Too good. Too kind. Too altruistic. It must simply be a facade, he decides, and takes you into his care >.> But it's not! He's been too close for too long and there's no mask there for it to slip. You are you and he is almost FURIOUS and --

ah.

I'm going to really go on a journey if I don't stop there. Ahem. I'm encroaching more than I meant to, sorry. Thank you for sharing! Even though I got a little swept away for a moment ^_^

Tell me about your self-ships!

[yzeltia]

Year of the OTP - January

January: Snow & Historical "AU" Characters: U'rahn Nuhn & @driftward 's Nyx Blackmoon Rating: T for Timey Wimey Notes: All future entries are gonna follow the same format; however, will be parodies of existing media and I'm very excited. Thanks to Driftward for their Blorbo and line editing for Nyx and mechanical passes!

The wind howled as it blustered about the cabin, causing the fireplace to give a little whistle. Nose pressed to the window U'rahn sighed, letting his breath fog the pane.

"Is something wrong, Rahn," Nyx asked from behind.

"Well, I kinda wanted to go night sledding, but the weather doesn't look like it's going to cooperate."

"Did you consult a skywatcher before you made plans to come out here?"

U'rahn blinked then rubbed the back of his head, "No…I guess I should have."

"Agreed."

"Well, it's still a really nice cabin to hang out in. I'm glad we could borrow it for a night. We can just hang out by the fire and drink some cocoa."

"Would you like me to prepare your Hero Cocoa?"

U'rahn blushed and shook his head, "I can do that…you should just relax by the fire. Hey! I know! I'll tell you one of the stories my mom used to tell me as a boy. The Origin of Miqo'te!"

"I am familiar with the origins of Miqo'te. But if you mean that as a storytale, I have not heard it," the women responded, moving by the fire to stand stiffly at attention as she watched U'rahn start to heat milk.

"Right! It started something along the lines of…Upon an Era, long ago, all the Miqo'te lived as one…"

"Our food stores are running low. We're not going to last much longer if we don't figure out a better system of hunting," a golden-haired Miqo'te sighed.

"Agreed," his beautiful mate agreed, painting half her face in a traditional manner, "We are-"

"Rahn. The tradition of hunting paint did not come about until the Keeper tribes were well established."

"Really? Well…maybe I'm misremembering. The point is she was very beautiful and an adept huntress…Anyroad, at odds they started to debate…"

"Jua, I appreciate your insight; however, the best prey moves at night when the moon goddess shines her love down for us as we move shrouded by darkness. The day is far too bright and wears our people down fast."

"Nyx….I mean Mwezi! My beautiful wife. The sun goddess, for which all things thrive under her life giving love, brings us the best bounty for our people. The dark of night leaves our people prone to unseen be dangers that would be revealed in the day."

"You are incorrect."

"Then, let us make a contest of itd! You lead a team of hunters, and so shall I. Over one day we will see who's hunts yield the most."

"Acknowledged."

And so with a kiss, Jua and Mwezi parted company to organize their respective hunting parties. Here too they differed, Jua asked their people to choose among themselves who their best hunters were, and nominate them to come forward. Mwezi chose her companions herself, taking along only huntresses she'd seen prove themselves in battle before her own eyes.

"I am unsure of the veracity of this story, Rahn."

U'rahn looked back, tail swishing as he fiddled with some chocolate in a small bowl. "It's just a storytale! Things are probably a bit off from what really happened. I'm also doing it from memory," he explained away.

"Understood. Continue."

"Right, so Mwezi was the first to hunt."

"The huntresses of the night party hunted close together through the night, ensuring one another stayed safe from any predators that might have chanced upon them. Their hunt took them all night, but by daybreak, they'd found their prize.

Meanwhile, at home, Jua waited for Mwezi to return. His heart ached while she was away, and as the sky went from black to blue he agonized over her return, worried the worst even though in his heart of hearts she was the superior hunter. He waited by the door, thinking only of her and how happy he'd be to see whatever she brought back, even if it meant she'd prove him wrong. His heart drummed within his chest thinking of-"

"Rahn, I am unfamiliar with this story, but I do not understand what Jua's affections have to do with their contest."

U'rahn tilted his head tugging at a bag of large marshmallows before pulling too hard and sending them flying all over the counter. "I'm just…setting the stage a little. Basically, he loves her a bunch and that's important. Anyroad…"

"Daybreak soon came and Jua departed with the elected tribes folk into the light of day. Not needing to worry about hidden predators-"

"There are many species that have evolved to camouflage themselves in the day."

U'rahn stared at his girlfriend for a moment, only getting a stare back of course. Fluttering his ears, he returned to his confection.

The group split managed to find many prizes, and by day's end had a rather large haul. Upon their arrival, Jua and the huntresses were all waking, and soon met the day party at the villager's center. 

"Husband, you've returned," Mwezi greeted, watching as his party brought in their caravan of creatures, some felled, others kept alive for their potential as livestock.

"I have! I bring you twenty-six beasts that might serve for meals and or the longevity of the tribe! Behold the sun goddess's bounty," Jua cheered, gesturing to the creatures behind him.

"That is a menagerie of prey, husband," his wife stated plainly, staring quietly at what was brought in. "We will now present our hunt."

Behind her, the huntresses pulled in a giant buck, larger than their biggest dwelling. Pulling the beast to the tribe center, she nodded to Jua and said, "This one buck will provide meat for an entire moon, its bones will be used as tools for a generation, and the leathers we take will clothe us for just as long. It is the moon goddess that has provided for us."

The entire tribe cheered at the haul. Both husband and wife embraced but then parted.

"It seems both our paths were prosperous this day…but we are not normally so fortunate. Perhaps it was our pride and determination."

"We are a large people. The ecosystem would falter if we hunted with this amount of success every day. I've concluded that our hunting styles and leadership were not to blame. We are too much for this land to take care of. I propose, for a time, we divide ourselves to the north and south to let the land recover."

"How would we ever divide our people though, my beautiful wife?"

"I will take those who hunt by the moon to the north where the days are short. And you, Jua, will take those who hunt by the sun to the south where the days persist."

Jua frowned, "I would be apart from you my love. "

"It is necessary for our tribe to live on."

Jua sighed then held his wife tight, knowing she was right. And so the tribes split, wandering far from one another. Though Jua made sure to visit his beloved Mwezi in the North, when they passed, the two new tribes found little reason to come together. And so, the Keepers and Seekers came to live on separately from one another, evolving from the lovers' small sacrifice of time into healthy tribes that scattered the world over—the end.

U'rahn smiled as he brought over a tray of cocoa and crackers, sitting down by the fire, Nyx lowering herself beside him.

"A good story, yeah?"

"Allagan records indicate the Keepers became night hunters due evolutionary attributes in their eyes allowing them to perceive more light in the darkness, marked by their pupils' dialated appearance.  The Seekers have narrow pupils, allowing them to see greater detail in their surroundings as they don't have to adjust for the intensity of the light around them. To survive, it was necessary to form bonds with those who had similar biological advantages for hunting. I do not believe your story was true, Rahn."

U'rahn frowned a bit and shook his head, "Well, it probably isn't. It's just a storytale…or a umm…"

"Fable. As a story, I can appreciate it. Thank you for sharing it with me."

The Nuhn lit up a bit then scooted closer to his girlfriend, as she looked down at her cocoa. Atop, two marshmallows floated, one with cinnamon sprinkled on top and a crudely drawn cat face, the other dipped half way in dark chocolate with two mismatched eyes. "You have made these gelatin cubes into our likeness."

"Well, I figured I'd make something special…y'know, for us. Our own version of Herrro chocolate."

"Understood. Thank you, Rahn."

"A good experrrience?"

"Yes, Rahn."

Drinking his cocoa deep, he let out a happy purr then leaned against her as he tangled their tails together. Fluttering his ears, he sighed happily then began to doze, Nyx quickly taking his mug before it could spill over into their laps. Outside, the snow continued to fall, and once Nyx had finished her drink she nudged U'rahn awake, leading him sleepily upstairs to rest properly together for the night.

[thedegu]

some thoughts about ale (my oc)

god so ale, love of my life, blorbo of all time. one thing I want to talk about dearly with them is their issues of identity. now due to backstory stuff, they've considered themself dead for the past decade, give or take a year or two. because the person they were before someone tried to kill them and the person they were after are just, to them, completely different beings.

Now they are a binder (a 3.5 class that I highly recommend), meaning they bind to vestiges. Small bits of power from powerful dead beings such as gods, heroes of the past, liches, and fiends, to name a few. Now, part of that is that whatever vestige (lets say Naberious) they bind to takes a ride inside their body. so that the vestige can have something like being alive again. Not in the driver's seat, mind you, but having some influence on Ale and their interaction in the world- it isn't a one-way thing.

With ale being at 9th level, that means they can bind to two vestiges. so inside their body, they have their own soul plus two temporary, passengers. only echoes of these once powerful beings but very much present.

So functionally, ale has three souls inside their body. well, actually they have five; due to story reasons and magic item finds, they are permanently bound to two additional vestiges. one who is just a tiny echo, barely there but still providing some amount of power, and Delvar-nar, who is just a guy that ale can speak to and get advice from. Delvar-nar is fully within ale's body (heh) and a terminate fixture to the meatsuit.

ON TOP OF THAT

Ale's soul, the one that they thought was their own. is actually a reincarnated hero from another multiverse who chose to be in this current world to save it like they saved their previous home. Now, this previous incarnation, Acamapichtli, ale considered a completely separate person from themself, but they are getting more and more memories filtered into their head from their time as this great hero that those lines are being blurred.

ale presents themself with a very strong personality (16 cha). They fill up rooms with their presence and let people know who they are. they are never Not 100% themself, even when one of the vestiges they've bound to is trying to take control. mostly because they are afraid that if they slip even slightly, they will lose their grip on who they are, they will be lost entirely.

which, depending on the day of the week, might not be the worst thing ever. like if one of the vestiges takes complete control, or Acamapichtli, turns out to be a completely different person, well, its not really Ale's problem anymore. not exactly a win-win as ale likes existing and generally prefers that, but its a 70/30 thing, and if it does happen then so be it-- it won't be their problem.

[ratsandfashion]

Finished up "Werewolf The Apocalypse: The Book of Hungry Names" with female blorbo, and she didn't just LIVE, she....she basically WON. She did BETTER than Male Blorbo, and got the following achievement: "Bubblegum Hurricane Superclear: End the story with a full pack, all human and Garou allies, and max Renown (50 points)" Basically, she didn't let anyone die. Unlike a certain someone who was like "oh, Black Tarn fucked off to the Umbra? fine, let her. Oh, that journalist kid died? Good, they were getting to be a nuisance. Oh, Elton went down in the final battle? Well, he was useful." As for the Max Renown part, that REALLY surprised me. Garou get three types of Renown; Honor, Wisdom, and Glory. You get Honor and Wisdom for making choices/doing things that are, of course, honorable or wise. And she racked those up pretty well. But you get Glory for great physical feats of strength, bravery, victory, a willingness to take risks (so long as they pay off) and just basically being a badass. Which, she had a hard time gaining at first. But I guess without my noticing she somehow just accrued ALL THE FRIGGING GLORY AND EVERYTHING ELSE by the end?! It may have helped that she wasn't exchanging all her Renown with spirits in exchange for Gifts (additional powers) like she definitely DID do exchanges to get stuff like the ability to heal others and so on, but once she had a decent repertoire she didn't get greedy and take anything needless (plus a lot of the ones less were either unsuited to her personality or the spirits wouldn't teach her anyway; each spirit has different qualities in a student they seek) So her Renown, which spirits take as currency, just...piled up I guess. Anyway, towards the end, when things are wrapping up and the Big Bad is defeated and so on, you can choose what you want to do next, where you and your pack will be refocusing your energies until something else happens, and I chose for her to focus on helping the people in the human community who lost so much in all this without ever knowing what it was about, and I really liked this bit:

"People are so hurt," you say. "Spiritually, economically. I want to help them."

"And I think you will," Black Tarn says, smiling. "Your Honor doesn't just shine into the spirit world: it's helped protect this land from the worst of the Wyrm's predations. I believe you have the strength to help people rebuild." And then this was the very last bit!!

“Gaia did not grant werewolves their Gifts so they could fix cities, but Garou are part human, and your pack turns all its cunning and power to helping those who most need it. [. . .] 

And slowly, slowly, the whole city starts to change. Maybe Gaia should be granting her Gifts so werewolves can help humans. Or maybe that's what she wanted you to do all along, and the Garou Nation prefers getting into fistfights with monsters. Under your care, people thrive. Sure, sometimes you have to rip a fomor in half or kick a wizard's door down and take his books before he infects the whole apartment complex with Banes or cognitohazards. You're a Garou, you're here to fight. But mostly you help, you restore, and you rebuild.

The city is healing. Maybe the whole world is healing. Maybe you've discovered something entirely new. One hot June night, moonless and windy, you look down from the Academy of Music fire escape on a party in the park. Nin is getting ready for another show. The other Garou are chatting with the people down there. A few months ago those people were so desperate, so afraid. Bane-bait, the walking damned.

Now you can almost hear the Wyrm roaring in frustration. This isn't how you're supposed to fight, the dark spirit rages. This isn't how you're supposed to win. END It's just the perfect ending for her and I'm so happy she got it ;_;

Anyway, time to play a total chaos gremlin next!

[wallywise]

Thanks for the tag !

Are you named after anyone: Well my real name is based of a flower so not someone, and I chose my actual name because of Wally West, my DComics blorbo <3

I just really like that name, it suit me

when was the last time you cried: Today :((

I was very angry and try to explain why so.. I cried- :’D

do you have kids: Well my dog and literally all the kids from stranger things are my children so yes I have 😌 other than that ? Non

do you use sarcasm alot:

Well I try to use sarcasm, I like to use it and use it pretty often I think 🤔 but I have difficulty understanding it, so if I use sarcasm and someone answer sarcastically I don’t always understand x’D

what is the first thing you notice about people: The way they dress (and subconsciously what they like and what image they want to give), I love to observe people outfit, it really show what they like !

eye color: Dark brown like Mike 😌

scary movie or happy ending: Why not both ? :’D I don’t like sad ending (except in horror movies when I’m not emotionally attached to any character but the second I love one of them I need a happy end :’)

any special talents: I’m a very fast person, i can think, learn, mémorise, write and draw/paint very fast, like very very fast, i finished my 4h exam in 1h30, not because I understood everything, just because I’m fast 😐

where were you born: I too was, strangely, born in an hospital, small world indeed 🤔

hobbies:

Is watching stranger things for the hundredth time considered a hobbie ? More seriously drawing and painting are my favourite things, I really like writing too. I scuba-dive, do theatre/drama and surf

do you have any pets:

Yes, a dog and two cat :D

what sports do/ have you played: Is scuba-diving a sport ? I did dance, gym and crossFig but didn’t like it, I like swimming though

How tall are you?: 1m70 😌 5,6 In feet approximately

favorite subject:

Biology and English :D (English in French school not English in an anglophone country because I’m French and French is the worst subject so English must be the worst subject for anglophones)

dream job: Marine Biologist ^^ I’m starting studies next year, one last school year to go 😐

No pressure tags ! :

@howtobecomeadragon @afterglowsssss @augustweary @robinthewise @autisticwill @strawberry-slushy

15 questions, 15 mutuals.

Tagged by @trentcrimminallybeautiful thank you gert my beloved <3

Are you named after anyone? - Yes, but I don't really feel a connection to my birth name much, so I'd rather talk about my online chosen names! For the name Fallon, I just picked it because I liked the vibes honestly and also after an oc I made when I was really little. And as for the beloved name bestowed unto me, Milk. I made a typo introducing myself ("Gallon") and it stuck 😔<3

When was the last time you cried? - hm, probably a couple weeks ago? I cry when I get hungry lmao

Do you have kids? - This bear flowerpot thingy is my beloved son:

But as for human children, no.

Do you use sarcasm a lot?- unsure if absurd threats of eating furniture in response to Cool Art/Fic count as sarcasm, but if so, yes

What's the first you notice about people? - if they have a Funky Outfit on I'll probably notice that first (and then get too intimidated to talk to them because they're CoolTM)

What's your eye colour? - brown

Scary movies or happy endings? - happy ending sorry I'm a coward

Any special talents? - I play violin, and I'm particularly adept at making typos

Where were you born? - hospital

What are your hobbies? - writing, reading, rug-hooking, cooking/baking, going on walks in nature

Have you got any pets? - yes, this is my beloved fool of a dog Clyde:

What sports do you play/have you played? - none on a team, but I like playing tennis and roller skating

How tall are you? - 5'5" I think?

Favourite subject in school? - used to be English lit, but I'm a sociology/gender studies major now. but I also love Italian despite not being very good at it!

Dream job? - currently looking to go into academia! (scary!) but if I could have any job in the world, it might have to do with marine bio/conservation, or cooking, or writing, or an archivist of some sort, or a forensic entomologist, or someone who Sorts things all day, or-

Tagging (no pressure of course!) : @shiningsagittarius @never-wake-up @personinthepalace @xkurtwagner @hangrybluewhale @ae-jurumi @middle-class-trash @deeskip @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @papermillll @amysterywrappedinanenigma @nobody33333333 @sophieswundergarten @itsgoghtime @kneeslapworthy @oflightningandstars @rebecca-mbs-fan @phtalogreenpoison @crow-in-springtime @heyitsthatonesmolgay @lemondropletters

ok listen I know it said 15 but I got carried away-

that being said I definitely am forgetting people - if you see this, this is your open invitation to join (and I do mean that!)

[mvalentine]

Uno reverse again 💞.

Which Midnights song(s) do you associate with Lana and Ethan?

(I actually wanted to ask you this since the album came out but it completely slipped my mind).

lizzie <333

thank you for sending me this because as you know i am constantly making spotify playlists & pinterest boards for all my blorbos <3 the brainrot is outrageously strong atm

okay lets see!! :

as you already know, the great war is an ethan x mc song fullstop. i already made an outrageously lengthy post about it so i won't expand here but yeah -- these two are ready to go to war and get at each other's throats way too easily. but then when they're together, they would go to war for one another. all because they survived the great war.

paris!! especially because that was one of the places they visited on their honeymoon <3 also 'romance is not dead if you keep it just yours' its LITERALLY so true & so them. they're both very private people, and to them their relationship is something sacred, something that is just theirs.

labyrinth!! like are you kidding me is miss taylor swift secretly an oph stan or smth?? how are all the songs so spot on?? i think this relationship is the most intense either one of them have been in, and all these feelings- they're absolutely terrifying. also 'never trust it if it rises fast'?? it perfectly summarizes their journey and their whirlwind of a romance -- the high post ch15 to the fall of ethan leaving without a word. i love how it can double as both a heartbreak song for these two but then later becomes a love song. because it all worked out in the end, and the both of them truly would break their back to make the other break a smile <3

also because i'm extra & love to ramble -- maroon is definitely a raleigh x lana (raleigh is the guy lana 'dated' while ethan was in his flop era and she..... kinda broke his heart). the sad thing is that in another life, they would have literally been perfect together and i do have an au where they end up together <3 but yeah the switch from 'i chose you' to 'i lost you' & the line 'sobbing with your head in your hands, aint that the way shit always ends' YIKES this song is so them like the song has a definite feel of an inevitable ultimatum, and ultimately their relationship couldn't survive because she was in love with someone else. in that same vein, midnight rain also works for them she truly was midnight rain while he was sunshine.

also also!! you're on your own kid is SUCH a lana song <333 it really perfectly encapsulates her growth and how she left her home and started a new life all on her own. she's always been on her own, but she's made it (and now she's not so alone anymore). also omfg karma <333 its essentially a massive fuck you to her dad because she's out here living her best life while he'll never be able to because well.... he's the worst. and sometimes the best revenge is simply living your best life. also okay last song before i shut up but omfg would've could've should've. i know that the song is about a toxic predatory relationship, but alot of the lyrics also work for a toxic parent-child dynamic. like 'memories feel like weapons', 'the tomb won't close i fight with you in my sleep, 'if clarity's in death then why won't this die' and of COURSE 'give me back my girlhood it was mine first' AHHH it all screams lana </3 she hasn't spoken to her dad in almost 8 years by the time she starts at edenbrook...... and yet.