#but my shipper heart is PLEADING for it to be romantic

[rockinlibrarian]

Post-Umbrella Academy S4 Reaction Part Five, appropriately: On Love Triangles (spoilers under cut)

Man, that makes me feel compelled to add a Reaction Part to my projected six Reaction Parts, and then reorder them so Viktor's is seventh. Anyway.

So in this series of posts so far, we've had the Good, the Bad, and now we have the Incredibly Controversial. (We also had the Fandom and the Fix-it, but those didn't fit as nicely into that sentence).

I have a pretty nicely curated Tumblr dashboard. I only follow people I like, who have sensible things to say, and I try to avoid diving into tags and For Yous (which a remarkable amount of the time make no sense— when I do look at that feed, I see topics people I follow love that I have NEVER INTERACTED with. I tolerate these topics for the people I follow, why would I want to see more of those from strangers?).

Yet I have seen no middle ground on this next topic. Half my TUA mutuals are over the moon, half are positively livid.

And here am I in the middle feeling ACK.

I'm allowed to be in the middle, right?

Let’s dive into my opinions on (is this really a spoiler anymore here on Tumblr?) Five/Lila/Diego under the cut.

Yeah, it’s not my ship, and I would never have made the choice. I make no secret about my non-canon OTP, and Lila/Diego was the only CANON ship I ever found interesting enough to root for. I found Five and Lila’s best-frenemies relationship utterly delightful and I’ll miss getting to accept it as that and not the early stages of enemies-to-lovers. But from an in-story standpoint it does make perfect sense, even if it’s not a direction many viewers wanted it to go in.

Linking back to the Venn diagram I reblogged at the start of the Season 4 Discourse: “I liked it,” “It made in-universe sense,” “it made narrative sense.” Although, just to be annoying, the topic refuses to be sorted into even those categories nicely. Certainly most of us seem to disagree on which— if any of them— even apply.

Let’s take it one topic at a time. Viktor got a whole post to himself, so I need to give some attention to the other half of my favorite characters/OTP/most-commonly-POV’d babies, Five. You see, the most common complaint I hear about this plot development is that it’s totally out of character for Five. Five would never hurt Diego that way! Five is aroace! Five spent his life trying to get home to his siblings, he’d never give up and decide to stay in the subway! Since when would Five put romantic love over familial love?

I disagree. Maybe I’m wrong— many of the people I’ve seen making this claim have consistently written takes on Five that I very strongly adore. How could we disagree on whether or not the dude is in character here? But let me plead my case.

It’s true that Five is different this season, and not in a fun way. His feral-ness is one of the most delightful things about him in general, and it just…wasn’t there. But I think that’s a question for the “I liked it” portion of the Venn diagram (feral Five is so much more fun to watch than sad and tired Five) and possibly for the “narrative sense” portion (do you really want to abandon the the most popular qualities of a character just for the sake of realistic character progression?). It DOES make in-universe sense, because Five is depressed in season 4.

Think about where he is at the start of the season— and for the whole show before that. He spent his whole long, traumatic life obsessed with getting back to, with saving, these people, and all they have done in return is ignore him, yell at him, and blame him for things that weren’t his fault. Viktor my love not even you are an innocent here— sure you spent 17 years mourning him, but then when you finally get him back, you brush off or outright deny everything he ever confides in you, and then you abandon HIM for six years, and he was in the body of a minor at the time, he really could have used you by his side there! (My shipper heart insists his betrayal was the worst of all of them, and even platonically it very well could be).

These people he dedicated his life to turned out to not just be idiots (in his estimation), but they’ve gone and pushed each other— and him— away for six years. His whole life purpose had been to save them, and for what? For them to take it for granted, to squander their second (third, fourth…) chances at life complaining how life sucks and it’s probably Five’s fault? What did he do all this FOR, in the end? And what should he be doing with his life NOW? He’s lost his goals, his meaning. IT’S DEPRESSING DANGIT but it makes sense!

And then he ends up stranded in time. Again. But this time he’s with somebody else— an actual real-life friend instead of a figment of his imagination. He fell in love with Delores because they were partners alone in time— why wouldn’t it happen with a flesh-and-blood person, who can actually act in loving ways toward him? Okay, it’s his sister-in-law, but they’ve been lost for six years with no guarantee of ever getting back, she and Diego had already been on the rocks (I’ll get into her side of the thing farther down), and what does Five care about conventions like How to and not to act with one’s brother’s wife, anyway? He’s feral, remember? He’s not going to stop and say, “No, we can’t do this, it’ll hurt Diego’s feelings,” in this situation! They’re lost in time and all they have is each other!

And let’s examine the whole concept of Five in a romantic relationship to begin with. Obviously I’m not against the concept, because I ship him. It’s ridiculous on my part, because when I started reading TUA fanfic I honestly said, “Wow, it’s refreshing to have a character so impossible to ship as Five is— how many interesting GEN fics can this guy spawn?” and before I knew it I was shipping him with his adoptive brother. BUT. I have also fully embraced the popular headcanon that he’s ace (note: show-Five is not comics-Five in many ways, and this is one of them). Aspec, at least. (NOT aro: I don’t know how anyone can see the way he’s always talked about/treated Delores and not understand that he is absolutely a total romantic). Even in my shipping fics, he’s aspec— “Viktor-sexual,” I have called it even. He falls for his best friend, and his best friend only. And— if I can shamelessly quote one of my own fics here—

“Look, I was married to half a mannequin for thirty-some years, I may have a slightly different understanding of marriage than the average person….Yes, I said what I said. Delores is complicated, okay? There are facts, and there are truths. Facts are I created her out of the rubble of a department store and my own desperation. I know this, I do! But the truth is she loved me. She kept me alive, she lifted me when I would have given up, she fixed my mistakes but forgave me for them, she made me laugh and even laughed back at me. That's what marriage is to me. A partner through the twists and turns of life! It has nothing to do with desire and passion and sex.”

And that’s exactly what happened with Lila! They had become partners through the infinite twists and turns of a seemingly-impossible-to-escape life! I keep seeing “since when does Five think with his dick?” comments, but he WASN’T! It took nearly seven years of close proximity, you-and-me-against-the-multiverse partnership, and shared traumas to happen, and significantly, she made the first move. It absolutely holds up to my own personal headcanons of how Five interacts with romantic love.

And I feel like Five doesn’t really segregate different kinds of love. Romantic or familial, it’s all LOVE, right? We actually had this conversation in the comments of the above fic, “New World Symphony,” just days before S4 dropped: there’s a scene where Five completely confuses the others by explaining that he doesn’t think finding himself married to Viktor is weird because “you’re my brothers— that’s family; he’s my husband— that’s family too,” and JBD— who, I must point out, is not a Fiktor shipper— commented, “Aww, for Five, family is another word for people he loves.” And I thought that was a brilliant way to sum it up (funnily enough, I responded by referring to Five calling Lila “family” at the beginning of S3!). So when he finds the answer to getting home— is it really so hard to believe he doesn’t want to go back? Lila is family just as much as the others are, and LILA ACTUALLY SHOWS HIM LOVE, which is more than any of his adoptive sibs did for him for those first six years back. He was DEPRESSED in the real world, and now he’s HAPPY! Things change! Of course he dedicated his life to getting back home BEFORE, but like the first episode says, it was the Unbearable Tragedy of Getting What You Want! Now he knows better!

From an “In-show sense” standpoint. Maybe not from a “Narrative Sense” standpoint.

Let’s now try to discuss the state of Dilila, but more briefly. (This post is already 1800 words long). It made me sad to see what a mess their relationship had become in the past six years, and I thought it was kind of mean of the storyline to threaten to break them up, but after awhile, as we saw more of it, I had hope for them! I just rediscovered the “Into the Woods” soundtrack recently and suddenly they were reminding me of the Baker And His Wife— they needed to go Into the Woods--symbolically and literally—to be separated from each other, to learn new things about themselves, to yes even have an affair on her part— to appreciate what they had together, to rekindle their True Love. They needed to reevaluate themselves, each other, and their lives, and a separation would only help them to do so. (Now, when we talk about the in-characterness of it all, I DO question whether Lila was completely in character this season— but I mean, that’s part of it, IS she being herself? What does she NEED to be herself? She has to figure that out!)

And here’s where we get to the “Narrative Sense” problem, because that never had the chance to RESOLVE. Going back to what I said yesterday about the problem with The End— EVERYBODY HAD UNRESOLVED ISSUES, and SOME of them were too FRESH to be resolved! Who makes that narrative choice?!

I think narratively, it would work best if Lila and Diego reunited, appreciating each other all the more, and Five would let it happen because he’s primed to believe that being happy is too much to ask for, which is very sad but it works.

Except Lila never does make a choice, and Diego and Five die mad at each other.

Stupid ending.

But to be honest, maybe the writers didn’t want to make the choice because they couldn’t decide either. Narratively we’re rooting for Dilila, but from an in-show character standpoint, Lila and Five really are better for each other than Lila and Diego are. They’re on the same level. They understand each other in ways no one else can, being Commission Agents/murderers and having both been manipulated and betrayed by the Handler. They are matches for each other.

You know, I’m kind of annoyed by this fact. Five IS actually the better choice for Lila. I really want her to be happy with Diego but the facts are facts, she’d be happier with Five.

DANGIT I don’t even KNOW how to ultimately deal with them in the Summerland fix-it! I WANT Lila and Diego to reunite and also want Five to settle into a happy queerplatonic partnership with Viktor (I will DO MY BEST not to ship them in this fic, for the sake of everyone else who might want to read it, but that may be the extent of my best), but now I’m like is that really fair to Lila? UGH, RELATIONSHIPS!

I may settle for everybody taking a break from everybody while they work out their individual issues. (I did start writing a Diego and Kerry scene to immediately follow up the Five and Viktor scene I posted the other day, in which Kerry uses the Power of Autism to compel Diego to be introspective. Who knew.

“My brother stole my wife.” “Did she get free again?” “What?” “You said he stole her. Where did he put her?” “No, I meant he— they had an affair, he didn’t kidnap her.” “You said he stole her, but it sounds like she went with him because she wanted to, so that’s not stealing.” “It’s— why do you care?” “Because you’re not being accurate! He didn’t steal her if it was her choice to go!” “That—.” That made him very uncomfortable, was what that did. “Okay. My wife left me for my brother. That make sense to you?” She peered wide-eyed at him and started to open her mouth, so he added, “and yes she came back. Physically. But physically’s not the point.”

--snippet edited 12:46 ET 8/18/24 just because I actually wrote that final line and it gives the snippet more of a finished feeling so I had to add it. Anyway, so Diego ends up focusing on his issues with Always Being Second-Best at Summerland. If he learns to deal with his own insecurities, he could possibly even truly earn Lila’s love back! But first he has to deal with HIMSELF!)

Long story short, I did not hate this development, and the thing I liked least about it is tied to the thing I liked least about the whole season: if they'd only had time to resolve their issues before getting annihilated from existence, it wouldn't have been terrible! If THAT had been, then I'd be all for it!

I mean, mostly so. I'm still going to be a shameless Fiktor shipper, of course.

[star-sworn]

1) Which kh trio do you think works out the most? I mean it’s gotta be the wayfinder trio right?

2) which trio is your favorite?

1. What an intriguing question anon…I agree, it’s gotta be Wayfinder as a group, simply because they’re the only ones that actually attend a school with consistent training. You could argue that killing Heartless literally seven days a week in violation of child labor laws as Roxas, Axel, and Xion did during their time in Organzation 13 kind of counts as a workout routine too? But yeah I would go Wayfinder WITH THE ONE CAVEAT that damn, have you seen Riku’s biceps? That boy works out enough for the entire trio. While Sora was taking a ride on the Mountain Coaster, Riku has been all aboard the Gain Train, if you know what I mean. Though as I think about it, I was a state level swimmer growing up, and so I can personally say that Sora’s abs have to be insanely strong to swim like a merman for hours on end, so… maybe this isn’t as clear cut as I once thought, anon. But Terra for sure is a gym bro. He needs those big strong arms to hug his friends real tight. Also look at his Break Time. Literally just flexing on all of us.

2. This one is tough, and if this turns into an actual novel, I cannot be blamed. So my answer is super basic, but it has to be the destiny trio. I absolutely adore Sora: he’s my darling boy, I miss him every day, and he alone would make this trio my favorite. He’s so positive, so kind, so protective of those he cares about, and I think what I love most is that, through and through, he really is just an ordinary kid, with ordinary dreams. I really feel that, while Sora likes going to all these worlds, likes meeting new friends and helping them with their problems, and he understands his role in saving the world and accepts that responsibility, he doesn’t care about being some big hero. He just wants to find his best friend, and go home to the girl he loves, his other best friend. His desires are so small, so simple, so human, I just can’t describe how much I love him for that. Second, because I am a ride or die Sokai shipper, and I could go on about them for literally 358/2 days, but I’ll try to keep it brief. Just look at the cave drawing they made when they were like four years old: even if it wasn’t romantically back then, they’ve literally loved each other almost their entire lives. Sora considers Kairi his home. He’s sacrificed himself twice for her. He spends kh1 and 2 yearning for her, dreaming about her. How he finally puts her first at the end of 3, and says "she's out there, alone... not for one more second." Going against Riku, against Mickey, and saying: i've done everything anyone has ever asked me to do. I've saved the world, I've saved all these people. Now I want to do what I want to do. I want to be with her. I can't stand that she keeps getting ripped away from me. She needs me, and I can't be without her for one more second. Swoon. Also, did you see remind? the gratuitous hand holding? the three dates they went on? One Heart? Just end me now. And the way he reaches across the divide of reality itself to save her in Melody of Memory? That their vow gave him the power to keep her safe like that? I don't care that shit's romantic as hell.

And this isn’t just because of Sora. Little kh1 Kairi, with no weapon, no magic, she’s surrounded by Shadow Heartless, so what does she do? She throws her arms around Sora. Literally shielding his little Shadow form with her own body. What about when Sora is tackled by a mob of Heartless toward the end of kh2? She jumps off a freaking balcony–once again, without a weapon of any kind. In kh2, when she reunites with riku, she's so happy. and when he tries to leave before Sora can recognize him, she pleads "Riku! Don't go!" and grabs onto his sleeve. She would do anything to stay with her boys, both of them. People always talk about how protective sora is of kairi (and I live for it), but Kairi is exactly the same when it comes to Sora. They both make that vow. And then how she holds on to him in kh3, keeping him on the edge of life itself? How he tells her, “I feel strong with you, Kairi!” with this big grin, and she blushes? I will never be over that. They’re both so devoted to one another, it’s just that Sora’s devotion is more prominent. Kairi is also brave and loyal, and she does her best for her friends no matter what, too. She literally gave up a year of her life sleeping to try and find Sora.

And going back to kh2, I also adore Riku. His whole arc, from childhood (and love) rival in kh1, the fall from grace, to his redemption in kh2? Absolutely beautiful. What struck me during my first playthrough of kh2 was Riku in the background. He wants so badly to atone for what he's done, yet he’s so ashamed he doesn’t want anyone to see his face, to know it’s him. It’s such a complete 180, to become so humble after being such a jerk. He creates that portal so Kairi can escape Axel. He teams up with Namine and does just enough to save Kairi, then tries to run away before she can find out it’s him. In his mind, he just wants to get her to Sora. That’s such a shift from “I have to be the one to save her” in kh1. And when Kairi jumps off the balcony, he saves her from the Shadows, then puts a keyblade in her hand(!!!) and literally fights with her, back to back. And do I even have to explain the end of 2, how Sora and Riku reconcile and Riku admits he was jealous of Sora? And then its Kairi’s letter connecting her heart with Sora’s yet again to open a door to the light for then to get home? While they’re playing Sanctuary??? Literally high art. I know Kairi is still kind of a lesser character in kh2, but kh2 still did a great job making it feel like they all love each other to death.

Which brings me to my one and only gripe with kh3: the destiny trio, or lack thereof. Before the paopu scene, Sora and Kairi literally don’t even make eye contact with one another. And before we rescue Aqua and Ven, the whole game is just everyone idolizing Riku and weirdly and not even tacitly bullying and disparaging Sora (which I was not here for). Even Riku is like “lol yeah you’re not good enough to save Aqua and you’re dumb for even trying” and then what does Sora do? He saves BOTH their asses. I digress. Now I know, in an interview Nomura talked about how kh3 was meant to show change. And since the other trios are all in peril, they’re all sort of frozen, static. So this kind of has to be referring to the destiny trio, and I do think we see that in 3 with the paopu scene. There’s a shift, and Sora and Kairi definitely have something they just can’t share with Riku. But as much as I love Sokai, I feel kh3 really needed at least one scene where they were all together, actually being friends like they used to be. Just going from 2 to 3, they seem like barely friends at times. But I do think they tried to show Riku being distressed when Kairi was killed, and sad when she went to sleep during Limitcut, but the execution was a bit poor.

And I have to say, seeing Riku, the guy who put the keyblade in Kairi’s hand’s and fought by her side in kh2 telling her to stay behind for literally no reason while he goes to Quadratum, that stung. It felt like such a betrayal of the love these three have for one another. And honestly, I’m getting a little tired of Riku, only because he’s already had one incredible and complete arc, arguably an arc and a half including DDD, and I just feel like he should take a backseat for a little while. Now, it’s my hope they’re playing the long game with this, that it will be up to Kairi–Master Kairi–to team up with/save her boys down the road, but I’m also way too hesitant to truly believe that’s what they’re planning. So in sum, I absolutely adore all three members of the destiny trio as characters in their own right. But especially in the sequence from 1-2, I love their friendship, how they’re doing everything for each other, that all they really want is to make sure the others are okay, that they grow and change in order to treat each other better, it’s just so beautiful. I think kh3 had so many balls in the air, it was trying to balance so much and tie up so many ends and set up so many new things that the destiny trio just kind of got lost in all of it. So I'm really hoping in the next phase maybe they'll get to team up together. Here's hoping, right anon?

Thank you for letting me gush about kh, anon! I’d love to hear your thoughts, or anyone elses! Happy 20th anniversary, I hope you're having a good day today. :)

[bothcreativitybois]

TMST Chapter 10

(Sorry everyone who got the notif for the first time I posted it, it was on the wrong account) This chapter is dedicated to the person who has beeing going through and liking (and I assume reading) all the chapters today. The Valentines Day class was meant to be one chapter but it ended up being too long so I split it into two, not including after the class ;] Ao3 link Wordcount: 2299 Ship: Intruality TWs: Swearing, sexual refrences, food Chapters: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 Taglist (ask to be added): @crazydemigod666 @star-crossed-shipper @newtnotfound @3amthebitchinghour @idont-freaking-know @someoneiwasnt @crownofrats @the-sympathetic-villain @cute-and-angsty-princess @lonelymuffin @bloodyjay-0666 @im-an-anxious-wreck @fantasticallytired @obsessive-fallen-angel

"I swear if you wear that same green flannel you've been wearing for two years I'll cover your car seats with bacon grease and let Cain go at ‘em." Roman commented as they leaned against the doorway of their twin's bedroom. "But it's lucky!" Remus protested as he looked at the shirt in his hand. Roman rolled their eyes. Remus clung to that shirt more than just physically, he'd won the election in that shirt. It was the shirt he wore when he became mayor. He'd worn it nearly every day since. Roman rushed forward and snatched the shirt. Remus tried to grab it but Roman dodged him and jumped on the bed, holding the shirt above their head. "No!" Roman mock scolded. "Give me my fuckin' shirt!" Remus shouted, pulling Roman off the bed. Janus watched the two bicker and fight like they were kids again, but with more swearing. "Remus, you're my brother and I love you, but I will rip this shirt to shreds before I let you wear it tonight. I mean, when was the last time you even washed it?" Roman lectured as they were pinned by Remus. "It's lucky!" Remus shouted. Roman thrashed their body sideways and knocked off their twin. "It's filthy!" Roman spat as they bolted across the room to Janus. "This is for your own good!" Roman quickly tied the shirt around Janus' waist with a double knot. Janus' eyes went wide as he looked down at the shirt then back up at Remus who had now set his sights on him. Janus was the fastest of the group, he sprinted down the hall with ease and locked himself in the bathroom. Roman and Remus watched from the bedroom. Remus wasn't gonna waste his energy when he knew he wouldn't catch Janus. He looked over at Roman. "That was a dirty move." Remus narrowed his eyes as he spoke. Roman smiled. "That was a dirty shirt." Roman clapped their hands and reached into their handbag. "You're gonna wear this and a nice pair of clean jeans." Roman pulled out a deep green silk shirt with a black heart embroidered on the breast pocket. Remus took the shirt in one hand and looked over it with hesitation. "You know this isn't what-" Remus began but Roman cut him off by grabbing his hands. "Trust me." Roman pleaded. Remus sighed and his body slacked. "Fine…" Remus got changed, he left the shirt open enough that his chest hair poked out. When he was done he sat in front of the bed so Roman could braid his hair. Remus was never good at braids, the first time he attempted was their first day of high school and he tried to follow a guide online but just ended up with a giant knot. He went to Roman to show the new hairstyle. But Roman forced him down and brushed out the knot, saying they knew what was best for him. Remus never bothered learning after that, if he needed his hair done he just asked Roman. “It’s not a date…” Remus attempted to reassure himself. “Right?” “Nah. Just two dudes getting dressed up, hanging out and doing a romantic baking class for two on Valentine's Day.” Roman mocked. They don’t need to give advice when Remus is like this, just an outside view, and a few well placed insults. Remus sighed. “I clearly tried to ask him on a date!” Remus laminated and cracked his knuckles. A nervous habit he’d picked up as a teenager. “You said four full words and none of them were ‘date’.” Roman reminded him as he pushed Remus’ hands back down so he couldn’t crack his knuckles. Admittedly not one of Remus’ smoothest lines. “He’s just so… soft. Y’know? What if I’m too much for him?” Roman just nodded. Those two were thirstier than herding dogs after a sheep drive, there was no debate on whether they actually had the hots for each other. “But everytime I’m around him I feel this high I haven’t felt before. I don’t know what to do about it, and I surely don’t wanna make him uncomfortable. I just want to...” Remus wasn’t sure how to finish that. He didn’t know what he could do about this feeling. “You want to..?” Roman prompted. Remus looked down at his lap. Roman had done this before, they’d been in a fair share of relationships. Maybe it was time to be honest? “I keep thinking about him.” Remus admitted. “At first it was just

fantasies, regular dirty stuff. But they became more… domestic. I just want to hold him, see him smile, pull him away from work when he’s tired but just to cuddle. I want to see him every day, kiss his head each night. Am I trying too hard to be someone he would like? I mean I’m not really doing it consciously but… I don’t know...” Remus tried to explain. Roman laughed speechlessly and turned Remus to face them. “You really do have it bad, huh?” Roman mused. Remus just nodded. Roman suddenly got serious. “That’s what happens when you want more than just a hook-up.” “We didn’t-” Remus started angrily then took a deep breath in and out. “I don’t even know where to start.” Roman turned him around again to finish the last bit of the tight french braid. “It is actually painful to watch you two.” Roman joked. Remus tried to turn but Roman pulled his head back. “Roman, I’m serious!” Remus begged. Roman tied off the braid with a hair tie and turned Remus again, both their faces serious. Roman looked hard into Remus’ eyes. It was a look he’d never quite seen. They could always read each other but not this. This was something new. Roman sighed. “Tell him.” Roman finally advised. Remus’ eyes went wide. “If you keep this in it’ll eat you apart and god knows what you’ll do. Just rip off the band-aid and tell him. Not like you’ve struggled with that before.” “He’s going through so much right now… would it be selfish of me to dump it on him?” Roman gave their brother an impressed look. Remus never thought things through like this, he just ran in head on. “He really has done a number on you.” Roman sighed and pat Remus on the shoulder. They pulled something from their handbag and tucked it in his breast pocket. “My lucky pen, nothing can go wrong now.” Remus looked down at the scratched and chewed back end of the pen sticking out of his pocket. “You fucking hypocrite.”

The bakery was more full than Remus, or anyone really, had ever seen it. The interior wasn’t done yet but they had made it as presentable as they could for the class. Roman split off from Remus to go find Logan while Remus searched for Patton. It was hard when every five seconds he was stopped by a couple who wanted to talk to him. “Mayor Remus! Lovely to see you!” One man greeted. “Hey Remus! Long time no see!” Another couple said. Remus kept conversations short, he was already late and needed to get to Patton. He eventually pushed and excused his way through the crowd. The moment Patton saw Remus’ arm he pulled it into the kitchen. “I said five.” Patton reminded him as he went back to work. Remus stared at Patton. “Nevermind just come help me set out these mixing bowls, thankfully Logan was kind enough to help me put out the tables and-” Patton realised Remus wasn’t talking. He looked up to see Remus staring at him with a slack jaw. Patton smiled slightly. Remus really couldn’t take his eyes off Patton, mostly off the tight ripped jeans that fit so perfectly. Or the adorable baby blue ruffled asymmetric top with cute pink hearts, teasing a glimpse of Patton’s shoulder. “You…” Remus tried. Why was this happening again? Why when he had walked in so confident? Why could only Patton, the one person who he wanted to talk to non-stop, make him so speechless? “Sexy.” The breath caught in Patton’s throat and his face got hot. “Not bad yourself.” Patton said quietly in reply. He could see just a glimpse of Remus’ perfect chest with how low the shirt was buttoned, really that was all that he needed. Remus cleared his throat in an attempt to fight the creeping blush. “Uh so, bowls?” After everything was set out and everyone was gathered and had on aprons, they stood and stared at the front where Remus and Patton were. Patton suddenly got nervous, so many people were looking at him. He’d been practicing what he’d say all week but now the words were stuck in his mind. Remus could feel Patton trembling next to him. Remus grabbed his hand from behind the counter. Neither of them looked down, they were scared that if they did it would somehow break the spell. Patton smiled to himself and took a deep breath, Remus didn’t realise how strong Patton’s grip could be. “Hello everyone!” Patton said, letting go of Remus’ hand. Remus nearly reached up to grab it again but stopped himself. “Happy Valentine's Day and welcome to our lovey dovey date night baking class! You may already know my assistant, Mayor Remus.” Remus waved at the group. Patton’s voice was happy but still stiff and nervous. He couldn’t quite loosen up. “Today we’ll be making two simple recipes that you can make again at home. The first is a lovely red velvet cake for two, then after that we will try to make some adorable little heart shaped pie pockets on a stick where you get to write cute little messages to your partner.” Remus lit up. “Wait… we can write anything?” The crowd watching laughed. Patton looked up at Remus with a professional presenter smile, the kind he’d only seen on game show hosts. It didn’t suit Patton as well as his usual smile. “Anything that fits on the label.” Patton said. He got out a mixing bowl and began making the batter for the first dish with the set out ingredients. He narrated each step with Remus jumping in with a joke every second sentence or so. Remus watched as Patton relaxed into the baking, his fake smile became the sweet grin he always wore and his voice slipped back into its regular tone. This was the Patton he came to see. “Now I’ll come around and check everyone's batter, when I give you the all clear Remus will give you your ramekins.” Patton announced when they finished mixing the ingredients. “Ah yes… ramekins… I know what those are…” Remus looked around lost, the crowd laughed again. Patton picked up a large container of small ceramic dishes and handed it to Remus, he took out a pair and held them up. “Oh! Tiny bowls!” Patton took the ramekins he held up. “They’re all different colours, make sure to remember your colour.”

Patton said and put the ramekins back into the container. Patton went around to each couple and tested their batter. He mixed it a little, stuck his finger in and let it drip, then tasted it. He would add a little more of this or that then declare them ready. Eventually they got to the back where Roman and Logan were. Remus loomed closer to Patton protectively. “Logan…” Remus muttered. Logan nodded in response. Roman and Patton looked between the two, the tension was denser than the batter. “You two are doing great up there!” Roman said cheerily in an attempt to distract them. “And looking great may I add.” Roman winked. Remus knew that smile, that was Roman’s 'my plan worked' look. “Thanks to you.” Patton said as he grabbed their bowl to inspect the batter. “Yes, you two have quite an interesting dynamic with your striking differences. I admit it is entertaining to watch. It’s like watching snow fall around a campfire.” Logan added. The words ‘striking differences’ got stuck in Patton’s mind. “You need to mix it harder.” Patton said, trying to push the looming dread away. Was he the snow or the campfire? Neither sounded like a good choice. He tilted the bowl so Logan and Roman could see. “See these little flecks, that’s the butter.” Patton gave the batter a good stir and showed them again, the butter fully mixed. “How’d you do that so quick?” Roman asked in amazement. Remus shifted the tub of ramekins onto his hip so he could grab one of Patton's arms and lifted it. “He’s got good brawn for a shortstack.” Remus said, squeezing Patton’s arm. The twins laughed. Patton blushed. Remus poked Patton’s stomach. “I’d love’ta see what he has under there too.” Patton flinched away as the twins laughed again. He blushed but also felt uneasy. Before with Remus he could just assume he was joking, but now he knew Remus had feelings for him. He shouldn’t know, he should’ve respected Remus’ privacy and not listened into his conversation. But now he had heard it he couldn’t unhear it. He couldn’t help but hear an extra layer to everything Remus said, he didn’t know what to do. He was still deciding what to do about his feelings for Remus, he didn’t want to flirt back and lead him on when he hadn’t made a choice yet. “The batter’s good now.” Patton said dryly as he took out the ramekins and placed them on the counter. Roman and Remus shared a confused look as Patton trodded back to the front of the class. “Alright, split the batter evenly between the two ramekins. It should fill them both a little more than halfway.” There it was again, that fake smile.

[lycorogue]

Thoughts about episode “Lie”

Okay. Here we are. This is back to the better writing I was talking about the other day. I love me parallel stories, so this was just *chef kiss* in that department. 

Before I delve into my thoughts on the episode itself, I want to take a step back and talk about my views of the non-love-square ships Lukanette and Adrigami. (Feel free to skip ahead; I have a header for when I start talking about this episode again)

Lukanette and Adrigami

For me, Marinette and Luka had romantic chemistry from the word go. As much of a Marichat shipper as I am, I knew that if anyone could make Marinette forget about Adrien, it wouldn’t have been Chat Noir. It would be Luka. Chat Noir would then come in at a close 3rd (a bit ironically) when it comes to Marinette’s heart. Meanwhile, Kagami slowly grew to have a crush on Adrien post-Riposte, and then charged forward knowing exactly who she wanted. On the flipside, though, I stand firm that there wasn’t really much romantic interest coming from Adrien. If anyone was going to make Adrien forget about Ladybug, it would be Marinette; not Kagami.

The episode “Frozer” - the one where Kagami makes her crush known for the first time, and Adrien first attempts dating her - practically gives us some foreshadowing of their entire relationship. Aside from clearly finding Kagami attractive (as showcased by the pink-bubbles-vision when Adrien first sees her sans-helmet in “Riposte”), he doesn’t seem to have any romantic inclination towards Kagami until after she cups his cheek and lets him know, in not so many words, that she likes him. Even so, it isn’t until Marinette basically gives the thumbs up that he should pursue this relationship does he give it a try. He’s still very uncomfortable around her, and only gets a bit more comfortable in “Animaestro”; probably because he’s seen his father around Kagami’s mom and just mimics that (as seen in “Backwarder”). Going back to “Frozer” though, Adrien spends most of his time with Kagami watching Marinette, and even abandons Kagami in favor of checking in on Marinette - something Luka could have easily done and probably doesn’t because he sees Adrien already on it and knows Marinette would prefer Adrien’s comfort. So Luka doesn’t push the issue. That whole ice rink interaction shows that, while Luka trumps Chat Noir as a potential alternative love interest for Marinette, Marinette still surpasses Kagami as a potential alternative love interest for Adrien. This, for me, is again hinted at in the episode Heart Hunter where, while enjoying himself seemingly equally with both girls, there’s just these little hints - complimenting Marinette more than Kagami, asking Marinette to choose the ice cream - that, at least subconsciously, Adrien is leaning a touch more towards Marinette over Kagami. His heart just isn’t all that into this relationship. This is again showcased in the New York special when Adrien (at least in the English dub; I haven’t watched it in other languages) asks Marinette to dance with him with an almost pleading tone in his voice. (To be fair, clearly Marinette isn’t thinking of Luka at all during that trip either...)

I think the final Foreshadowing nail in the Adrigami coffin is this dialogue from “Frozer”:

Kagami: “You still keep doing what other people want you to do.” Adrien: “No, I just want him to be happy.”

In the end, Adrien did the same thing with Kagami: he did what he thought would make her happy because he’s a people pleaser to his core.

Adrien of course found Kagami attractive and fun to hang out with. She was a fantastic companion, and I love their companionship so much. However, I feel like he dated her mostly because he knew he had to find some way of getting over Ladybug, and here’s this pretty girl who clearly has a thing for him, so why not???? Their parents were practically setting them up as a couple anyway, between the trip to the royal wedding and the movie premiere. Plus, this “approved” friend meant he could spend more time outside of his father’s house while genuinely enjoying the company. Win-win. He then did all the pseudo-dating stuff he’s clearly witnessed in media; kind of following a play-book as it were. 

However, he never did anything even remotely romantic or flirty towards Kagami that was on par with his romantic gestures and flirtations towards Ladybug (or even Marinette, for that matter). His love language is obvious after watching him with Ladybug, and he uses some of that same language (albeit subconsciously... probably...) while interacting with Marinette. Things like leaning in playfully (ending of “Troublemaker” and when asking Marinette for a macaron in “Despair Bear”), sharing a romantic picnic (“Glaciator”) even if it was just to cheer Marinette up, winking (the endless winking in too many episodes to list here), whispering in her ear (“Despair Bear” and one other that I can’t recall right now), Soft SmilesTM (“Chameleon”, pretty much all of the NY special, tons of season 3 episodes), confessing insecurities or secrets (“Gamer” and “Gorizilla”), or asking her to dance (“Despair Bear” and “NY Special”). I’m sure there’s tons more and each example has more episodes it’s showcased in, but you get the idea. Alternatively, Adrien just never used that same love language with Kagami. With her it all felt like calculated moves; it was expected of him to lean in for the kiss in “Heart Hunter” and “Miracle Queen”, or wipe away the smudge of ice cream by Kagami’s mouth, so he did it. Aside from his protectiveness and care for Kagami in “Onichan”, Adrien never really treated Kagami any different than his other friends.

Marinette, on the other hand, does show some of her love language towards Luka. She blushes around him and does that bashful little shoulder shrug. She makes excuses to touch his arms, hands, chest, or back. She literally leans on him. She has an interest in his interests and even goes above and beyond for gifts, such as the necklace (yay; Luka looks so good in a necklace!) and, unofficially, the contract with Bob Roth for Kitty Section. 

Granted, she doesn’t flirt with Luka like she does with Chat Noir, but, as someone who also used to flirt with my guy friends without truly realizing the romantic implications (I was a disaster as a teen, okay?), I don’t know if Marinette has truly realized how flirting is part of her love language. If she is anything like I was, flirting is more a fun past-time to see if you could get a rise out of someone in some sort of sextual-tension game of chicken or something. It’s not something you do with someone you have serious feelings for. 😝

Back to Kagami though. I want to stress that, while I didn’t see any romantic future for Adrigami, I do still very much like Kagami and appreciated the character development the writers gave her. I love her as one of Marinette’s potential friends and, as I mentioned, a companion for Adrien. I just never saw any romantic interest coming from Adrien towards Kagami. He never even truly seemed himself around her the way he is around Ladybug or Marinette. I don’t think he’s comfortable enough to not be Textbook BoyfriendTM around Kagami. He even mentions in this episode that him being a clown IS the real him and she calls bullshit (although @gale-gentlepenguin​ does have some nice commentary on how even that wasn’t exactly truthful and Kagami was right to call him out). Point being, Adrien loves to be nerdy and goofy and playful, and she just doesn’t get that????? A lot of what Adrien likes she seems to dismiss.

I’m sorry, Adrigami shippers. There could have been potential there as these two grew, but as it stood? I just didn’t see it.

The Episode “Lie”

Going back to my thoughts on “Lie” though with all of that above commentary for context. I just feel a bit cheated that Clearly-There’s-Mutual-Pining Lukanette gets ONE kiss lean-in for the whole “love rival” arc they’ve had set up for 1.5 seasons before the relationship implodes, but Clearly-Only-One-Has-Feelings-And-The-Other-Is-Just-Kinda-Going-Along-With-It-Because-Hey-He-Likes-Hanging-Out-With-Her-And-She’s-Cute-So-Why-Not Adrigami has THREE kiss lean-ins in THIS ONE EPISODE ALONE (not to mention the 2 from Heart Hunter/Miracle Queen)!? Like I said, I feel a bit robbed, but... well fed, Adrigami shippers, I guess...

Anyway, my heart hurts so much because yes, Kagami deserves someone who will take the time to be with her (just like how Luka deserves the same), but also, it’s not like Adrien WANTED to abandon her (much like Marinette not wanting to abandon Luka). These poor kids. All four of them. My heart breaks. 😢

I did feel a much stronger emotional gut-punch with this episode, which is surprising because a) we already saw a good 5-10 min of it in “Truth” so this episode was essentially shorter than the premiere, and b) I’m a much stronger Lukanette shipper than an Adrigami shipper (see above). So, bravo to the writers on this episode. I hate that this team broke so many hearts, but this is the caliber of writing I was hoping for. 

(I know Marinette is the Guardian, but can we agree to have more Adrien-centric stories, please? They’re just so good).

My final thoughts though: WHY ON EARTH DID THE WRITERS EVEN BOTHER WITH THE “LOVE SQUARE RIVALS” STORY LINE IF THEY WEREN’T GOING TO FOLLOW THROUGH!? ADRIGAMI AND LUKANETTE FINALLY GET TOGETHER AFTER 1.5 SEASONS ONLY FOR THE RELATIONSHIPS TO BE DOA BASICALLY THE NEXT EPISODE!? WHY!? TO RESET THE STATUS QUO THEY WORKED SO HARD TO SHAKE UP!? I already talked Friday about the lost story potential with Lukanette, but there’s also a lot Adrien could have learned from his relationship with Kagami. 

Adrien is still VERY vocal about his love, and, while he has learned a lot, matured a lot, and has eased up a lot, Adrien does still semi-burden Ladybug with his feelings; something Luka never did to Marinette. Adrien, possibly due to witnessing his parents - I have theories about the romance dynamic between Emilie and Gabriel - seems to have this view of love being okay even if unbalanced. Ladybug is far more powerful and crucial to the protection of Paris, but they are still partners and equals in their eyes. So maybe he feels the same about love; he may be more romantically devoted to her, but as long as Ladybug loves him even a little, it’s like they’re equals in romance... right???? So... yeah, a more balanced relationship with Kagami could have taught him how important a romantic balance is as well. Plus, if I am right in my assumption that he just kind of went along with the relationship because he thought it was expected, then he could have also learned something about being a people-pleaser. There was a lot of growth potential for both Marinette and Adrien in these non-love-square relationships, and it just feels squandered.

Also, as I mentioned with my review of “Truth”, I’m fearing that the writers are kind of railroading the Ladynoir ship. First, there’s Marinette realizing that she can’t have a boyfriend because he wouldn’t be safe, nor could she be truthful to him about why their time was so limited. The exception being Chat Noir, who can very much protect himself (except for when he’s shielding Ladybug, but she yelled at him for that in “Lie”), and she can be fully honest with him as long as it doesn’t involve their identities, and he very much knows and understands their time restrictions. In fact, he even goes so far as to state that ANY time with her is a gift he cherishes. He’s basically the perfect boyfriend for her in her situation; she just needs to be lonely enough to “realize” it. >3> On the Adrien side of things, Kagami tells him that she can’t trust someone who isn’t honest with her, but there’s Ladybug: fully understanding and completely trusts him even when she knows he’s lying. She also doesn’t fault him for their lack of time together and understands if he needs to run away without a moment’s notice. He’s already in love with her, but this whole situation just paints her even more as the perfect romantic partner for him. I get it, but I also hate it. I hate this feeling of this one corner of the love square being railroaded. It basically dismisses the other 3 corners as possibilities right alongside the Lukanette and Adrigami ships.

All that grumbling aside, I would like to give some applause to how the episode ended. I very much enjoyed that Kagami was like, “nope. You lied to me, and I can’t trust you, so we can’t be friends. I need time away from you. I’ll let you know if we’re ever okay again.” It shows the consequences of playing with someone’s emotions, even if under the best intentions. It also shows that it’s perfectly okay to cut out toxic relationships, even if the other person didn’t intend any harm. Well-intentioned people can still cause toxic relationships, and if you need to step away from them (as Kagami did), then you are completely valid in that decision. It’s an important lesson for kids to learn, I think. I’m just worried that Kagami brushing off even being Adrien’s friend (while justified) might mean not really seeing her in the show anymore, and that would be a shame. 😟 I do enjoy her as a character, and would love to see more of her growth. Plus, she is so limited in social interactions as-is, so I hope we see more Kagami and Marinette friendship growth.

I am also interested in how Adrien reacts to the knowledge that he can indeed ruin his friendships with people if they aren’t in the same emotional space. This is most likely what’s preventing Marinette from confessing: fear that Adrien will reject her so severely that he might not even want to be her friend anymore. So having Adrien now possibly have that fear as well has some interesting story potential (if the writers don’t drop the ball like they did with the Lukanette/Adrigami ships). Meanwhile, having a dejected Luka still offering friendship and support to Marinette - something clearly Adrien assumed would happen with Kagami; once a friend, always a friend - might give her the confidence to confess to Adrien, now trusting that they are good enough friends and he’s a kind enough person that they can still remain friends even if he doesn’t return her feelings.

There’s a lot of potential birthed from these opening episodes, but especially from “Lie” and I’m interested to see what the rest of the season is going to look like now.

Also... ARE WE SURE THAT LUCKY CHARM BRACELET IS ACTUALLY LUCKY!? IT’S BEEN THE HIDING SPOT FOR AN AKUMA TWICE NOW!

[verobatto]

Destiel Chronicles

Vol. CIII

It was a love story from the very beginning.

Two Worlds. Two Hearts. (Part. II)

(13x17/13x18/13x19)

Hello again! Second part of this huge preamble to 15x18!

We'll be talking here about episode 13x18, 'Bring them back Alive' it's a huge reflection of Dean's inner fears and also we will find a lot of Destiel parallels and mirrors.

Redemption Arcs

Ketch is here, in this episode, trying to redeem himself.

KETCH: ...the rift closes.

DEAN: Look, we just got spin-cycled through space and time, okay? And yes, this is... different than my last drop-by. And what's this “we” crap, hmm? You came here to save yourself, so... go save yourself, somewhere else.

We don't forget Ketch tried to kill him and kidnapped his mother. So, Dean rejects him in everyway.

Ketch and Dean share the same amount of Guilt, tho, so, we can see them as reflections of each other. But Ketch is the murderer, the one Dean doesn't wanna be. So, Ketch reflects on him all the bad things Dean sees in himself.

And, it's not casual that we see AUCharlie in this episode. Charlie is one of the biggest GUILTS Dean feels in his heart. So, Dean changes the plan once he sees Charlie in danger. It's like a second opportunity to save her.

DEAN: No, I prefer the "let's find Charlie before the angels turn her inside-out' technique.

KETCH: Remind me again why we're risking everything to find this girl?

DEAN: Because she's seen my mom. She's seen Jack. We need her.

KETCH: And you're sure that's what this is about? You're sure it's not... personal?

Of course it's personal! Dean needs to save Charlie this time!

Another interesting quote, and very meaningful for us, Drstiel shippers, was Dean saying to Ketch that 'he wasn't his type either' once Ketch observes he was looking bad, as a nice parallel to that scene in season 10x03 in which Dean compliments Castiel's looks.

Gifset credit @inacatastrophicmind

But, moving on from this cute Drstiel detail, we have Dean with a mortal wound on his shoulder (also foreshadow of Sam's wound in season 15 that will connect him with Chuck), the important symbolism in this scene is Ketch healing Dean. If Ketchs represents Dean trying to redeem himself, this scene is plenty meaningful for all the path Dean will walk in season 14, self knowledge and healing with self acceptance.

The Connection

And Cas gets mad and jealous, of course. He can't understand why Dean rushed things. He doesn't know Dean won't allow him to put his life in danger in this AU as he did at the end of season 12.

Gif set credit @timetraveldean

But, let's talk about connections...

Asmodeus proclaiming his connection with Gabe through the grace he consumes from him.

This connection can be related to AU!Michael and Dean, but also like the antithesis to Destiel.

Paying attention to this piece of dialogue, we will find the similitude with AU!Michael possessing Dean...

ASMODEUS: Gabriel! What are you doin', son? You know too well what I can do to you. I broke you!

As a premonition of Dean breaking free and healing from his emotional prison in 15x10, we have this quote. 'I broke you' that's what Michael tried to do when he released Dean in episode 14x03 and brought him back to his family. That was his plan to break him, but, even so, Dean was able to break free and lock him Michael down in his own mind.

Another interesting foreshadow related to Rocky's Bar (Dean's emotional prison) was Sam's speech to Gabe.

SAM: Gabriel, you have to dig yourself out of this hole. Look, I know you think it's safer inside. No more torture. No more pain. No more expectations. I've been there.

Gabe is also locked in his own mind, his own emotional prison. So these words are applying too to Sam (family love) and Castiel (romantic love) trying to make Dean see the reality.

SAM: You were nothing like your family. You sure as hell weren't like your dad. Me either. And just like you, I got out. Or I-I thought I got out. But then... then my family needed me. And this is my life. No matter how many times I tried to fight it, this is what I was put here to do. This is where I make the world a better place. And sure, yeah, hookers in Monte Carlo sounds great, but your family needs you. Jack, your nephew, needs you. The world needs you. We need you. [pleading] Gabriel, I need you. So, please, help us.

This speech is a mix of Sam and CAS talking with Dean inside his mind in the Rocky's bar as I said, and it's the key to release him. The 'family needs you' quote it's pivotal to open Dean's eyes.

To Conclude:

As Cas will face his own dark AUCastiel, Dean faces Ketch as a reflection of his guilt and self esteem in the AU world.

Gabe's breaking free from Asmodeus is foreshadowing Dean breaking free from his emotional prison in season 14.

Hope you like this meta. See you in the next one!

Tagging @magnificent-winged-beast @emblue-sparks @weird-dorky-little-d @michyribeiro @whyjm @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @dea-stiel @poorreputation @bre95611 @thewolfathedoor @charlottemanchmal @neii3n @deathswaywardson @followyourenergy @dean-is-bi-till-i-die @hekatelilith-blog @avidbkwrm @anarchiana @dickpuncher365 @vampyrosa @authorsararayne @mybonsai1976 @love-neve-dies @dustythewind @wayward-winchester67 @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @deeutdutdutdoh @destiel-shipper-11 @larrem88 @charmedbycastiel @ran-savant @little-crazy-misha-minion @samoosetheshipper

@shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @mishtho @dancingtuesdaymorning @nerditoutwithbooks @mikennacac73 @justmeand-myinsight @idontwantpeopletoknowmyname @teddybeardoctor @pepevons @helevetica @isthisdestiel @dizzypinwheel @jawnlockwinchester @horsez2 @qanelyytha

@destielle @spnsmile @shippsblog @robot-feels @superlock-in-the-tardis @superduckbatrebel @2musiclover2 @madronasky @anon-non2 @cea1996 @lisafu02 @asphodelesauvage @destiels-canonahhhhhhhhhh

If you want to be added or removed from this list just let me know.

If you wanna read the previous metas from season 13 here you have the links:

Vol. XCIII, XCIV, XCV, XCVI, XCVII, XCVIII, XCIX, C, CI, CII.

Buenos Aires, March 14th 2021 1:05 PM

[stuckinapatriarchalbullshitland]

Here I am bawling my eyes out as I read some camren shippers' confession as to how the ship has helped them. I am saddened by the fact that we are so persecuted but they never saw that this helped us in our dark moments. I went over to my wattpad and see authors saying they'll stop writing and they don't see the reason for it anymore and it hurts. To hear people say they'll stop hurts because they're so good and deserves to be appreciated with their art. People should know that reality and fiction are two different worlds. Camren just inspired that art to come alive in fiction. I also saw how passionate readers are in asking the authors not to delete the fics because it helped them overcome something in them and were close to their hearts. I see them pleading and writing long posts just to persuade writers not to stop. And when i see this, it pains me so because I see the passion in these people. I love Camren but I am a lover of art and literature first and foremost and for those artist whose inspiration is camren, I will forever be a lover of your art. Darlings, I could write you letter upon letter never to be discouraged by the hate you received. Also to my mutuals and to my favorite @stuckinapatriarchalbullshitland , thank you for being the revolutionist in a place where we are injected a reality so distorted, so fake.

To all of those threatening my beloved fellows, a bully and a threat is never okay. You say "but CS come at us too! " then come at those who bully you but have reservations to those who don't. But why am I even saying this? You people don't give a fuck abt it. Worth a try, I guess.

Stuck, emison, romantic, karla and all the others, they're just stating opinion and those who want to believe have the decision to. Those who don't then by all means, DON'T. Did they ever harrass you so you should believe it? You all have a freedom to choose. Use it. As we also have our freedom to not believe in sm.

Just as artists have their freedom to express their art, consumers also have the freedom to choose whether to consume it or not. Don't come threatening the authors and the poets inspired by Camren. The readers will always have the discretion to read or not.

Again, dearest mutuals, beloved authors, lovely editors, you are good with what you do. I am a fan. Amidst all these hate, padayon, ha? (Move forward, okay?) 💓

Love u,

Celeste

___

As always, it is a pleasure to read you dea,r friend. It is a bit sad to realize that everything you mention is disappearing, but I hope I am not wrong in saying that they will return, in time. And I say this because if it happened once before, and they returned, they will return. We just have to give time to time and perhaps calm down a little to continue here. Thank you for mentioning that I am your favorite blog, that is very nice and kind of you and I am very happy that all the crazy things that go through my head regarding fandom, girls and circuses, is to your liking. I think one of the most important things about this fandom or what this fandom, this group of so beautiful people has to take into account, is that belief is important and inspiration is important as well and if the girls and their relationship (friendship , love, whatever), has inspired so many of us, we don't have to stop believing in it. This is more than a ship, folks. Is a feeling. Lauren could have said a lot of things against Camren but she mentioned that their love and friendship was always there and I think that's what inspired us all the most. Let's stay with that and with the fact that no circus and no lie can change that inspiration, that beautiful feeling. We cannot make it dirty because there is already too much dirt around us for more on top, let them take that away from us. We can't let them take that off us, folks. Maybe we can't do anything except that. They cannot take away our right to believe in a beautiful story and they cannot take away the inspiration that brought us and still brings that beautiful story. If we do that, they win.

[boycottyashahime]

Hello! Anti-Sessrin person here. You said if this couple becomes canon it will ruin Sesshomaru's character development. I would love it If you could elaborate on that because you're always so eloquent and smart. It's ok if you don't feel like it, though. Have a nice day!

I've actually been looking for an excuse to sit down and write out a cohesive post on my thoughts about this. Contrary to what the shippers want to believe, my interpretation of Sesshoumaru and Rin's relationship doesn't have anything to do with my moral objections to child grooming. I happen to think there's plenty of evidence for a filial interpretation in the text.

First, I'd like to preface my little essay here by saying I'm going off the manga alone. I haven't seen the anime in a long time, because I dropped it when I got a little tired of trying to reconcile the inconsistencies between the two mediums. So, if you read this and have an impulse to say, "hey, what about that thing in episode such-and-such...", keep in mind that I probably just don't remember what you're thinking of.

So, let's go back, alllll the way back, to Sesshoumaru's first appearance. Here's a guy who tears off a dude's head for no other reason than to get the attention of his subordinates to demand a boat. Here's a guy who's spent a long time looking just about EVERYWHERE for his father's remains, not to pay respects, but to plunder them. Here's a guy who feels ENTITLED to rob his dad's grave for treasure he deserves simply for being his father's son.

Sesshoumaru begins his journey as a selfish, spoiled, entitled brat. He doesn't fit the usual profile of a kid throwing a tantrum on the street because he wants the expensive toy sitting in the window; he's very posh and very reserved, but fundamentally, his motivation comes down to the simple fact that he wants Tessaiga. It doesn't even really have anything to do with respect and admiration of his father, otherwise he wouldn't have been so eager to rifle through dear old dad's bones to get at a sword when he had another heirloom right there at his hip. Only Tessaiga was representative of the sheer destructive force he wanted to wield, so he ignored the fact that his dad didn't seem to want him to have it.

This is important, because at first, Sesshoumaru doesn't seem to think of his father in terms of the guy's intentions or the steps he takes for the sake of his sons. Like most rich spoiled kids, Sesshoumaru views the Inu no Taishou in terms of his prestige and how that priviledge can be appropriated for selfish ends. Sesshoumaru wants Tessaiga not because he needs it, but because it's a birthright, and reinforces his legitimacy. When it's clear that Tessaiga seals Inuyasha's youkai blood, keeps him from going berserk, Sesshoumaru loses interest in Tessaiga - it's just a crutch for Inuyasha, and there's no prestige in taking it from him or using it for himself.

Sesshoumaru doesn't start to REALLY consider his father's intentions for the swords until later in the manga, when it comes out that Tenseiga was originally part of Tessaiga, and Inuyasha was meant to get the Meidou Zangetsuha attack eventually as well. It's at this point that Sesshoumaru starts to question if daddy actually HATED him, to give him a rather neat power disguised in a lame shell, but only to develop it so Inuyasha can have it instead, even after Inuyasha already got Tessaiga in the first place. It kind of looks to Sesshoumaru that Inuyasha gets all the powerful cool shit their father left behind, and that there might have been some favoritism coming down HARD on Inuyasha's side.

Above, you can see Sesshoumaru has two interlinked but distinct issues that are addressed throughout the story - his lack of compassion and empathy, and how tied his identity is to his father's favor and prestige. These two are somewhat separated in the narrative; there's a kind of pause in Sesshoumaru's development while a bulk of the middle of the story deals more with other characters and their development, but there is a little bit of a thematic connection between the two halves.

We'll start with the development of Sesshoumaru's compassion since, well, that's where the story begins working on his character. Right before Rin shows up, Toutousai let's Inuyasha's group in on the sword Sesshoumaru carries around and what it does, indicating that Tenseiga requires a compassionate heart to function. A bit ham-handed, but RT isn't very subtle most of the time, so we'll allow it. This sets up the next few scenes in which Sesshoumaru is unable to move and must play captive audience to a little girl doing the literal opposite of what he's used to. Sesshoumaru's habit is to show up and kill things, with no thought to the years of history, relationships, thoughts, emotions, etc that he's snuffing out. But while he's reclined injured in the woods, Rin demonstrates actual LIFE and the preservation of it, that part Sesshoumaru never gets to see. It's made all the starker by how BAD Rin is at caring for herself, let alone the strange monster she found in the woods. She does exactly nothing to help Sesshoumaru, despite how hard she tries, and is even injured by others in her attempts. She is the very picture of vulnerability, the opposite of the strong and capable Sesshoumaru.

This is a stark contrast, because anything less wouldn't be enough to create the necessary awareness of Rin's struggles that Sesshoumaru needs in order to use Tenseiga on here. And I know I've said this before, but I really cannot stress enough how obvious I think the symbolism is when Sesshoumaru uses Tenseiga for the first time; a phallic object gives life to a child, and the object's owner looks after that life throughout the rest of the story. He's not very good at looking after it, and it's clear that he's not sure about taking responsibility for Rin at first, because she pleaded for him to come back for her when he and Jaken left her behind to requisition a sword from Gaijinbou. To me, it's reminiscent of a teenager who knocked someone up, and ended up having to learn to give a crap about the result.

But, even if you don't accept that symbolism as particularly significant, Rin being a child, and human, and weak, unable to survive on her own, are important characteristics to how Sesshoumaru's compassion develops. Sesshoumaru is one of the strongest characters in the series, and he rarely has to worry about his own safety. And since he's in the habit of just murdering everyone he comes across if they're in his way, he's never had to worry about the safety of anyone else, either. When Rin comes into the picture, though, Sesshoumaru is faced with the uncomfortable reality of vulnerability in general. Through her earnest and incompetent attempts to foster survival in a world that can and does crush her, she's opened his eyes to how the disadvantaged, those without a powerful youkai lineage to rely on, have to struggle.

Rin herself has nothing to offer Sesshoumaru within this context of supreme vulnerability. She's not a friend, because she can't offer mutual support or use a skill to their benefit as a team. She's not a lover, because, well, she's a child and sexual/romantic attraction are conditions that wouldn't allow Sesshoumaru to extend his compassion beyond just her. As a mostly helpless kid, Rin has to rely upon Sesshoumaru and his power to survive, and Sesshoumaru employs his strength to keep her alive, getting nothing but a sweet smile out of it all. She gets all the benefits, he has all the obligations. This is PURE compassion - using one's advantages to another's benefit because you care about them, and not because you derive something from it as well.

This is why making Rin into Sesshoumaru's lover is a REALLY thoughtless take. It puts conditions on the compassion and muddies the message.

Moving onto Sesshoumaru's continued character development in the latter part of the story, the sword drama starts back up with slow, when Toutousai shows up and offers to reforge Tenseiga into a weapon. Sesshoumaru discovers that because he got angry enough to break his primary weapon in defense of Kagura's honor, he's triggered the next evolution of Tenseiga into something that can murder. Which is what he wanted at the beginning, yay! I want to point out here that Toutousai says Tenseiga noticed a change in Sesshoumaru's heart - anger for the first time for the sake of another. This implies that what Jaken said about Sesshoumaru getting tangled up in the fight against Naraku because Naraku kidnapping and using Rin to manipulate Sesshoumaru hurt Sesshoumaru's pride is actually accurate; he just really hated the thought of Naraku trying to use him, even if it was a failed attempt.

After going through HELL to develop the Meidou into a full circle (literally), Sesshoumaru then learns that the Meidou belongs to Tessaiga and Inuyasha, and that it's supposed to be handed over. Now, part of Sesshoumaru's angst over this idea, I think, is not just "did daddy love Inuyasha more?", but also the assumption that Inuyasha would have to KILL him in order to retake the Meidou Zangetsuha into Tessaiga. Thinking that your father meant for your little brother to kill you at some point to take your stuff is a pretty disturbing thought, to be entirely fair to him. This is why, when Sesshoumaru jumps into the meidou to take back control of the Naraku-possessed Tenseiga and breaks it deliberately, he spends the rest of the time in there moodily resigned to disappear. He genuinely believes that his father meant for him to die at this point, and even after they get out of there, he seems genuinely depressed.

This is Sesshoumaru's lowest point as a character. He's lost something he thought his father had meant for him, at his father's own wish, and he can't help but question why his dad would give him something just to take it away and give it to Inuyasha. It looks for all the world like favoritism, and since the Inu no Taishou is dead, there's no asking him what the hell the meaning of all this is.

This is all leading to one of the most infuriatingly ridiculous scenes I have ever seen in a manga - when Magatsuhi has crushed Sesshoumaru and everyone thinks he's been killed/absorbed, Magatsuhi is blown apart and rendered unable to reform by the shiny new sword clutched in Sesshoumaru's newly regrown arm. I could talk your ear off about how having Sesshoumaru stop being an amputee is erasure of consequences for his actions, or how being given back an arm is kind of a slap in the face for actual amputees, and where the mother f*ck did that sword come from anyway, but that's not what this essay is about, so I'll just keep all that to myself. The point of this is articulated by Toutousai when he says that Sesshoumaru had to let go of Tessaiga and his father's heirloom to stand on his own as a daiyoukai.

We've already gone over how Sesshoumaru is one of the most powerful characters in the series, who rarely has to worry about his well-being. He's just really strong without having to try. Sesshoumaru had already learned that he didn't need Tessaiga ages ago - he knew this when he learned that Inuyasha needed Tessaiga to keep from tearing himself apart eventually. But when he thought he had been passed down something from his father that was truly meant to be his, only to put all this work into it so that Inuyasha could have it, that embittered him again. It's not that he wanted the sword necessarily, but the thoughts and consideration of his father, who seemed to be putting everything he had into Inuyasha.

But his previous experiences protecting and considering someone (in some cases, multiple someones) weaker than him should have tipped him off. During the very battle in which he got his new arm and sword, he was actively helping those around him avoid Magatsuhi and keeping them close because he had a plan and the strength to carry it out. He was willing to take the extra step to protect Inuyasha and friends before trying to take care of Magatsuhi though, and that was the point. He put everyone else's needs ahead of his own, even Inuyasha's, and he did it without even thinking.

Toutousai just articulated what Sesshoumaru should have already intuitively known by that point. He never needed his father's heirlooms, the swords, his dad's power. They were unnecessary for him from the start. Inuyasha needed a leg up, because his own BODY could kill him after a while. But Sesshoumaru always had the capability of being great on his own. He just needed to finally separate his ego from who his father was and become his own person; stand on his own as a great youkai. While I don't agree with the execution, I can get behind the big lesson - don't rely on your daddy's wealth and influence to prop you up, and do the work to build a personality and identity of your own.

Which is ANOTHER reason why making Rin into a lover would be a thoughtless take. It would walk back Sesshoumaru's final lesson about being his own person apart from his father.

So, there you go. A comprehensive post regarding my take on Sesshoumaru's character development. I could add in a bit about Sesshoumaru coming to understand his father's consideration and the lengths he went to for the sake of protecting Inuyasha by having to give similar consideration to Rin, but I think this post is long enough, and that one statement on that aspect pretty much sums it up. Let me know if you would like me to elaborate on any of this, or if you would like to argue any of the points, I'm up for it. Might take me a minute to respond, mind you, but hopefully it won't take as long as it did to draft this behemoth.

Take care.

[herald-divine-hell]

I wish Dragon Age: Inquisition went into more depth with Leliana, especially after the destruction of Haven.

The scene where she apologizes and urges the Inquisitor to blame her for what had happened at Haven is heart-wrenching and terrible; she’s practically pleading for them to punish her for the people who had died and the town that was lost. Its the first time the Inquisitor, I imagine, ever saw Leliana in such a helpless situation mentally and emotionally, a state which was hinted at during their first conversation in her tent over the purpose of her and the Maker’s.

“You must blame me for this...If they’d stayed in the field, they could had bought us more time. I was afraid to lose my agents. Instead we lost Haven.”

This entire conversation is why I prefer Leliana in Inquisition than Origins, and why I connected more to her than when I played Origins as the Warden. The complexity within Leliana, to deny her conciousness and morality and care that we see in Origins is saddening. I had played Inquisition first, so I did not know much about Leliana in DA:O, but when I this seen, see her blame herself for caring about her spies, ruined me.

“She’s honestly just the better spymaster. The best don’t get attached with their scouts.” - Varric Tethras, when asked by the Inquisitor why he isn’t the spymaster of the Inquisition and Leliana is.

But Varric here was flatly wrong, because as the conversation in Skyhold showed us that she does care. She always had. She always will. Its Leliana’s character to care about others. And the Inquisitor reminds her that she made the right choice, if you aren’t a dick, that their men aren’t tools to be used or discarded. Her caring, her consciousness, was right.

“Can we afford such sentimentality. What if Corypheus -”

“We are better than Corypheus.”

And she looks down, ashamed, in thought. As a Leliana/Inquisitor shipper, that sentence was just more than a boss reprehending their subordinate, it was a person who romantically/platonic cared about Leliana’s own mental health and well-being; it was someone reminding Leliana that she had worth beyond more than just a collector of secrets and sabotage.

Leliana is very much justified for feeling ashamed over her not realizing that such a massive force was arriving at Haven’s doorsteps. As a political and wartime leader, such a misstep can - and should - be critiqued, but the point of Leliana’s overall character arc in DA:I was meant to show that amorality and cold efficiency isn’t always the best option.

Where is the line draw between the actions of the enemy of evil and that of the good guys, and when should good trod near and across that line? Should it? These questions had been debated for millennia unend, and will be until humanity eventually dies off. But, Leliana’s feelings of ashamed, of depression, of her fight between caring for her subordinates and the possibilities of what could had been, is one of my favorite scenes.

I know a lot of people prefer the Warden - claim they are more interesting than the other two protagonist. And that’s fair. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. But the Inquisitor-Leliana relationship was surely neglected. While I would had preferred a romance for Leliana in DA:I, a platonic friendship between the two would be even more wonderful than what we got.

The Inquisitor, in my belief, would had been an inspiration for Leliana, a sign of hope in a world of darkness, which was left behind by the murder of Justinia. This conversation, if it lasted a bit longer or came up in another cutscene, would had been immense character and relationship growth for Leliana. It was a sweet scene, a sign that an remnant of Leliana still lingers, still has some semblance of control, but those conflicts between the Nightingale and Sister are in constant battle, with the Sister being aided by the Inquisitor if you so choose that route. It would be nice to see that Leliana can feel guilty, but the Inquisitor is there to remind her that all was not lost in Haven; that what she did was a wonderful step for healing toward her mental and emotional state; and that she has support, if she ever so needs it.

Now, time to write that fanfic.

[iwrite4obx]

hi love, could you do a jj fic where the reader is studying to become a nurse and jj would always go to her to patch him up but one time he just breaks down after a fight with his dad and realizes how she's always there for him and that he loves her? thank youuuu

Always There (JJ x Reader)

A/N: I can not thank you enough for the response to my last fic!!!!!! Over 120 notes!!! I love you guys! That aside, thank you for the request, love! This was really emotional and heartbreaking but I very much enjoyed writing it. I love when JJ opens up and feels his feelings ❤️ Requests are still open! But I might close them soon, I’ve got a list going. (For all you Sarah x John B shippers, I got one coming soon!)

T/W: mentions of abuse, blood and stitching up wounds. Sad angsty feels. Swearing.

If you are suffering from abuse please contact the authorities or some one who is in a position to help you. You are welcome to reach out to me to talk (that goes for everyone, actually. I’m always available for a chat or if you’re going through a hard time) but you should first reach out to someone who can truly help you.

Word Count: 1.3k

It's late. You sit on the floor, wrapped in a heavy blanket with a textbook open on your lap. You've been studying for hours now, and you're pretty sure you haven't absorbed any of the information for your test tomorrow. Nursing school is demanding and you are very dedicated to your studies, which means it is rare nowadays for you to get a full 8 hours of sleep. You are just beginning to drift off when you are startled by a knock at the door. You stand, letting the blanket slip to the ground and walk tentatively to the door. You crack it open and peer out.

Standing on the other side of the door is JJ a fellow OBX native and a friend of yours. You've know JJ for a long time, but the two of you have only recently begun to grow close. As a much as you love seeing JJ, as much as your heart flutters when you spy him in your doorway, you hate when he comes to visit. He only ever brings bad news. And sure enough, JJ is sporting a black eye and a small gash near his collarbone.

The first time he'd appeared at your doorway like this, you'd gasped, tears immediately springing to your eyes.

"Oh my God, JJ. What happened? Who did this to you?"

"Y/n, I don't wanna talk about it... Can you just patch me up, please?" His voice was thick with tears and his eyes were pleading, so you'd bandaged him up in silence.

As he began coming to you more and more, he slowly revealed to you his family life. Every time he visited, you managed to keep it together for his sake. Then, as soon as he walked out the door, you collapsed on your bed and cried for him.

You can't seem to find your voice, but you beckon JJ inside and shut the door behind him.

“Go sit on the couch, J. I’m going to grab a few things.” He nods an walks off to take a seat. You hate it when he's silent. Even when JJ is hurting, he can normally conjure up some sort of cocky comment. The fact that he doesn't say a word to means things are particularly bad.

You return a minute later with your first aid kit and medical supplies. You dump them on the floor and sit down next to JJ. You take a deep breath and focus first on the gash in his shoulder. It is still bleeding and looks quite serious. You apply pressure to the wound, but after several moments, you realize the bleeding isn't stopping.

"Shit JJ, this is bad. I think you need stitches."

"So stitch me up," He replies. His voice is raw. You can tell he's trying hard not to cry.

"No way! You need to go see a doctor!” you argue, concerned.

“I came to see a nurse.”

"You know I'm not an actual nurse yet, right?"

"Oh come on y/n. You take care of me better than any nurse would. Plus, you’re free." You let out a short laugh, but you immediately stifle it. Nothing about this situation is funny. Still, you are relieved that he's making jokes.

“JJ, I’m really not qualified to-“ you begin to argue, but he cuts you off.

“Please. I don’t want to- I don’t want to go anywhere. I want to keep this between us.” He begs, his voice cracking.

You sigh and give in, gently cleaning his wound, first with water then betadine. You have to dig around a bit to remove all the dirt. JJ grimaces the entire time, but he doesn’t cry out. You sterilize a needle with alcohol and retrieve the nylon sutures from your first aid kit to stitch him up.

"This is gonna hurt," you warn. JJ nods and reaches out with one hand to grip your knee, giving him something to hold onto. You lace the suture through his skin. He bites down on his lip, but is silent. You add 7 more sutures, tying each one off as you go. JJ looks relieved when you are done. He releases his grip on your knee and grabs for your hand instead. His eyes said "Thank you."

You reach for his shirt to pull it over his head. Every time he comes to you, he has either bruised or broken ribs, and while there isn’t much you for them, you still need to take a look. But he shoves your hand away in protest.

"Y/n, I don't think-"

You cut him off "Come on, let me see JJ. I wanna help," you say, tears already gathering in your eyes. If he’s trying to protect you from his injuries, they must be especially bad. He looks away and allows you to remove his shirt.

You can't stop tears from spilling from your eyes. His bruises are worse than you've ever seen them before. Splotches of blue and purple pattern his entire abdomen. He's even bleeding in a few places.

"JJ..." You whisper through your tears.

Hearing you say his name like that shatters the final shred of composure he was holding onto. He collapses onto you, throwing his arms around your shoulders, though it's clear from the way he fliches that it pains him to do so. He's sobbing. You can already feel his tears soaking through the fabric of your shirt.

"I don't know what happened, y/n," he stutters through his tears. "Last time, I promised I would never let it happen again. That I would fight back, hard. Even... Even kill him if I had to. But when he came at me I- I just froze. I felt like a little kid again. I let him beat the shit out of me. I took it all without throwing a punch."

"Shh... It's okay J. I'm here for you," you promise, stroking his back comfortingly.

"I know you are. You're the only one whose always there for me," he confesses. "You open up your door to me no matter how late it is. You don't ask too many questions, but you always listen. You're the only one. I- I love you y/n. And I know that’s fucked up to say, but everything about us is fucked up. And I hate coming to you like this because I know how much it hurts you but at the same time, there's no place I'd rather be. I just know that the only time I feel safe is when I’m with you.”

You are shocked into silence. Of course you've thought about JJ romantically, but it had just been silly fantasies. You've never once imagined that he'd confess to loving you. He's never before given you any indication that he thinks of you as more than a close friend. You are completely caught off guard.

When you finally found your voice, you say, "JJ, I don't think-"

"That I'm in a good place for a relationship right now?" He laughs bitterly. "If you don't feel the same way about me, then fine, but don't make excuses." He stares into your eyes. "Do you love me y/n?"

You lean forward and press your lips to his. It's a soft, gentle kiss, but you trust you lips to convey your feelings better than your words. They say to him the words you know to be true, but have always been too afriad to say out loud. I love you.

You fall asleep tangled together on your couch. But before your eyes flutter shut, you make JJ a silent promise. I will always be there for you. I would hold you tight, and I’m never letting go.

A/N: Anyone who sent in requests: I have not denied any requests thus far so if you sent me an ask, your story is in the works! But I have several stacking up, so please be patient as I fulfill requests in the order I receive them. Thanks in advance!

Also, would anyone be interested in being tagged in my future fics? Let me know!

[lady-plantagenet]

Ship bingo: Anne Boleyn & Henry VIII (I know, I'm not the most original person in this site); and Eleanor Cobham & Humphrey of Gloucester

Hey hey sorry for answering this shipbingo so late hh. Hope you’ll still be interested in my odd and headcanon-y analyses. Since you requested 2 I will write shorter comments if ur ok with that :) x

Anne Boleyn & Henry VIII

‘I broke England from the Church yeah I really am that secksy’ or something along the lines is said by Anne’s character in Six: The Musical. I sorta resent that. I’m not very passionate about this ship nor do I take any ‘sides’, but I must admit I’m more partial to Catherine of Aragon and consider her to be Henry’s true love. The odd thing is, this is also cause a part of my feels like Anne was in some ways to good/evolved for him?? We all know the whole seductress Anne trope or poor set-up pawn Anne, we don’t know which are true but one thing we know for sure is that there was ‘pious outspoken religious reformer Anne’ and that’s what I am more interested in. My admiration grew 1000x when I realised she was heavily critical with where the desolution of the monastery funds were going - how they enriched ministers and lackeys of Henry as opposed to going towards schools. I say all this because my mental Anne Boleyn might be a bit different from most people’s and that will influence how I also see this ship.

I guess the above paragraph explains the ‘I’m picky about it part’, I hate anything that is major baby drama. Delicious and intrigued are oddly left out because I don’t really feel that myself though I understand why others would. It is perhaps because it’s such an overportrayed relationship and because by the time it became a thing Henry was already kind of obese I believe. Sue me, I like both my ship parties to be attractive XD. I would read fic for it just like I would read anything provided it is well written enough. I’m currently reading ‘Chained in War and Love’ by Lady Perserverence on AO3 (you know that one really famous fic in the Tudor fandom) which I suppose counts but since it’s a Francois I of France/Anne Boleyn AU I guess it doesn’t count (and I much prefer this pairing). This ship is one of those historical pairings where it’s hard to deny it was not romantic and sexual, one must remember that there must have been something about Anne in particular that attracted Henry and her educational background was unusually worldly for a woman of minor English nobility, given the fact that she could very well have been 32 (and age which is considered old for motherhood even by our times) by the time she married Henry simply put there must have been a romantic/sexual attraction beyond just her being fertile. She, herself, may have also had reason to feel attracted to him (despite his fatness) because he appears to have exuded the character of a Renaissance Prince which I feel she could have been drawn towards.

To be honest the ‘it’s complicated and unhealthily’ kind of speak for themselves. I feel like a part of the breakdown went beyond her not being able to hear a son because he does not seem to have properly tried like he did with Catherine of Aragon - the marriage was only three years long. I also feel like he was a bit too set in the past for her and she may have felt disillusioned with how he carried out the reformation. I also feel like Henry thought he would find a woman with Catherine’s brand of strength but with an ability to bear children, but despite both women having education in common Anne’s Protestant beliefs made her someone entirely different. Their feelings were strong but they clearly were not made for each other. With that said, theology fasincates me so to an extent I am more interested in the consequences (the reformation and how it changed the fabric of England) then even the ship itself - that is not to say the ship doesn’t interest me. And yes. I could/want to be convinced that this ship is interesting but if anyone wants me to get on board you will have to first throw off ‘seductress Anne’ or ‘poor maligned pawn Anne’. Only mercurial Henry and reformer Anne will do for me. With that said, I really wouldn’t mind the unrequited love trope thrown in there but with Anne accepting him only because Cromwell and co convince her that this is the only way England’s religion can change. I also liked the ‘Anne of One Thousand Days’ spin where it’s unrequited on her side and then turns unrequited on Henry’s side. Now that’s super tragic and would grab my attention. Overall, I like Anne Boleyn but I don’t ship them because I don’t think they were compatible, I don’t like Henry and I hate how the reformation was carried out and how the knock-on effect was the death of the Tudor figures I care the most about: Cardinal Fisher, Thomas More and Margaret Pole.

Eleanor Cobham & Humphrey of Gloucester

I love ships where both figures were described as intelligent by their contemporaries because there’s also a meeting of minds there. It also gives this partners in crime vibes which I really like. This connects to my whole ’delicious’, ‘romantic’, ‘best friends’ and ‘I’m intrigued’. A lot of fun things could be done with this ship and so I would read fic for it but I remain unpicky (except for , you know, prose as per usual). As it happens I also already read fic for this pairing and unless you are her, I would recommend @nuingiliath who writes loads for this couple and is the resident shipper - I believe this is her OTP. On Ao3 she is ‘heartofstanding’ she has plenty of stuff both on her tumblr and on that site so just follow the tags. Also all I know about these guys is from her pretty much.

The thing is, Eleanor Cobham is like Jane Shore for me, she brings out very weird feelings because I am very traditionalist and boring and hate my infidelities and tend to have an aversion towards mistresses. However, like Jane Shore, Eleanor Cobham appears to have had some virtues and was more than a pretty face (apparently Jacobia herself was quite dull and that’s one of the things that turned Humphrey off her but I’m not sure if that’s hearsay). So just like that, I don’t get an ‘ugh’ feeling like I would with people interested in the Bourbon mistresses in the 18th century or such because I much feel like it wasn’t that physical. This is where ‘softly’ comes, the age difference makes me imagine Humphrey as having that dad-aura Idk (and btw no I’m not pleading daddy issues at all - I feel like it quite undermines this couple), his incredible level of learning further feading into this wise persona but obviously his skirmishes with the administration give me an impression of this grand daring man as well. He seemed the picture of true aristocracy and in all the way he falters from those expectations (eg lack of martial talent) I also like to see. As I said, Eleanor also being described as intelligent makes me feel that she was at his level and while I am satisfied that the necromancy charges were shams it does indicate that she was considered bright enough by her contemporaries in order for such charges to be levelled in the first place. While it is true that the whole affair was targeting Humphrey, I really feel like Eleanor herself possessed (or at least was perceived by others as possessing) a certain dangerousness and this course of action was pursued by their rivals in order to kill two birds with one stone. After all, we have seen how easy treason charges can be conjured against magnates who though not technically speaking guilty have acted against the wrong faction eg Clarence’s case. With that I also put ‘best friends’ because I feel like like all those traits derived from the facts I’ve been privy to point to the fact that the two were friends as well as in love and attracted to each other. They really give me a partners-in-crime vibe and I’m always all for that. Not to mention I’m also a sucker of one part of the ship dying (preferably the woman) with the other following not late after or at least never living a fulfilled life as a widow-widower. It’s cruel but I love my doomed couples. So yeah, I ship it, I really do. I also have a great admiration for Humphrey as I have a soft-heart for scholarly people, I also admire how he was not blindly loyal and quite brazen. It’s a personality that intrigues me.

[sparrow-in-boots]

i give you a character: Dorian Pavus uwu (but also,,,,,,,,, you could do our boy too,,,, even tho he barely appears in tw3 fjsjdjd)

here we go, baby uwu <33

[for the Give me a character ask meme] How I feel about this character

Simple, I love him. I love Dorian so much, I love his bright personality, his sharp wit, his incredible smarts, his vulnerable and incredibly gente and kind heart, just how deeply and truthfully he feels, his drive to do what is right and improve, to live free and standing up to what he believes in. God I love that man.

All the people I ship romantically with this characterI 

mostly just ship him with the quizzy (wink wink ;3c), not much of a fan of Doribull myself but i can see it, I've seen some Blackwall shippers make some convincing arguments but still on the fence there.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

Your usual suspects, Sera, Varric, Iron Bull, but I particularly treasure his friendship with Vivienne. Dear lord those two are so good and funny together, they both care so so much and both have their own way to keep their distance but they can talk equal to equal on many things, how they keep in touch after their time in the Inquisition, [clutches fist] they good!!

My unpopular opinion about this character

Uuuuuuh I don't rly know what unpopular opinion I could have about him tho??? Nothing that comes to mind at least.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

That Bioware's gross grey morality bullshit didn't keep us from telling him off about slavery. God i still get *so pissed off* about that. Like, I have other small things but this one! This is my One Thing! I wish had happened.

and bonus round content: the Boy™ cus I Must, i Can't Not do this for the Boy™ úwù (the boy in question is Caranthir Ar-Feiniel, for those of you out of the loop)

How I feel about this character

Love this edgelord bastard, just so much. Canon version he's the baddest motherfucker in the Wild Hunt, full stop, you cannot change my mind. Our expanded version of him is,,, Him Baby!! Soft and caring and good but still very much a badass, love me some characters like that, literally cannot get enough of him.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Well, the OT4, obviously!

My non-romantic OTP for this character

mmmmm that's a tough one..... he's got so many great non-rom relationships, but I'm gotta say him and Aisling. Chaotic little gremlin siblings, i love them so much...

My unpopular opinion about this character

Fanon designs for him where he's white and blonde and pale-eyed are hella boring u.u

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

More voice lines, I think. Would have been nice to have seen the Wild Hunt generals interacting among themselves too. Also, him decking Avallac'h, just once. Just one time, and I'll be happy, just please just one punch [pleading emoji]

[hunterxassasin]

A Year is all it Takes

I'm a filthy MariChat shipper sorry y'all

------

"Dance with me, and pretend that the world doesn't exist." Chat Noir pleaded, standing atop the baker's balcony. Snow was coming down from the night sky in flurries, it was freezing cold, but the black clad hero didn't care. 

Marinette flicked her gaze away from him, biting her bottom lip. She had just vented to him about all the things Lila had been doing and was continuing to do even after graduation, stealing her friends from her, spreading lies and what not. This wasn't the first time Marinette had complained to the hero, but it was the first time things got a bit personal. She wiped the tears from her eyes, not daring to look at him just yet.

A year ago, when she was in her final semester of her schooling before college, she would have rejected this offer as quick as it came. Back then her heart had belonged to the one and only Adrien Agreste, even if he never found out. She looked back at Chat Noir, gently reaching her hand out to his, which was held out for her. She hesitated for a moment, but then she took it. And after that there was no going back.

The two swayed gently in the cold, relaxing in the others embrace. Marinette shivered, her thin pajamas doing little to keep the cold from nipping at her skin.Chat Noir pulled his head back, looking at her with a soft smile. "You better get back in, I don't want you catching a cold on my account." He gently let her go, backing up. 

Marinette gave a heavy sigh, a longing smile on her face. "I guess you're right." She turned away, and began to head back into her room, her face a deep red. 

". . .she's beautiful." Chat Noir muttered, assuming Marinette couldn't hear him over the gently howl of the wind. He froze when he heard her voice once more before she disappeared into her room.

"Thank you, chaton." 

Chat Noir stayed rooted to the spot for a few long moments after this, staring into the dark room. He shook his head, and headed back to his home, a bit faster than he usually would.

---

Adrien dropped his transformation as soon as he slipped through his window. He collapsed onto his bed, burying his face into his pillows. Somewhere behind him Plagg sneezed. "Why do you insist on going out for such long periods of time,  especially in cold weather?" The kwami grumbled, zipping through the room to the stash of cheese Adrien kept around for him.

Adrien didn't answer, he got this question every time he detransformed late at night after being out for a while, it just became easier to ignore the little black kwami. He rolled over, gazing up at the ceiling, thinking about the soft moment he spent with Marinette. A stupid grin appeared on his face, and a heavy blush joined it. He and Marinette had been spending more time together, or well, Chat Noir and Marinette had been spending more time together. How it happened, he couldn't quite remember, all he knew was that after they finished school, Adrien found himself transforming into Chat more often than not, and hanging around the Dupain-Cheng patisserie. 

The business always felt more like home to him, and the more time he spent there as Chat, the more time he got to spend time with Marinette. They became close friends, and made it a regular thing, to spend part of their days together. People started to notice, they noticed how Chat Noir had stopped flirting with Ladybug, how he spent a lot of his free time with Marinette. At one point all the tabloids had been talking about it, it took an angry Chat Noir to get them to stay out of his business. Adrien hadn't really understood why he got so upset over the press being in his personal life, be was used to it before, and in fact, when he was pursuing Ladybug, had wanted them to get their hands on anything that might make his partner see him in a romantic light. 

Plagg had said it was because now his life involved Marinette, and he actually loved her, instead of just the strong infatuation he had with Ladybug, but Adrien refused to listen. Thinking about this made him exhausted, he rolled over and threw the covers over his head, falling into a light slumber.

--- 

Adrien's day had been extremely busy, the last of the winter photoshoots had been finished up, along with a few interviews with fashion magazines and press conferences his father made him attend. The sun was setting as he walked into his room and picked up Plagg from where the little kwami was sleeping. "Wake up, I need to stretch my legs." 

Plagg opened his eyes, glaring at Adrien."You were just out for the whole day, don't tell me you need to stretch your legs. You just want to go visit your little girlfriend. That's going to cost you extra. Get a cheese danish for me from there." He said grumpily, smirking as Adrien shook his head.

"Plagg, Claws out!" And with that he was off. The boy bounded out his window and across the roofs of Paris, waving at civilians as he passed. The hero hopped onto Mari's balcony just as the sun dipped below the horizon, the sky a gentle mix of dark colors and a bit of orange at the bottom. He tapped on the glass that led into her room, receiving a yell he couldn't quite make out. 

Moments later Marinette slid the door open and walked out, this time dressed in more than just her pajamas. She had a black and green coat on, with black gloves that had green paws on the palm of them. "Hey, Chaton. I thought you might now show up today. . .We're supposed to get a lot of snow soon."

Chat Noir grinned, and put his arms behind his head. "I'd never miss a chance to see you, purrincess. Besides, it's not too cold for this cat just yet." He threw her a wink, a blush rising on his cheeks. 

"You're turning red, you must be freezing. . ." She inched forward, and Chat gave her a curious glance. "What are you-" he was cut off by her lips meeting his. He was stunned for a moment, but once he comprehended the situation, Chat kissed her back, arms wrapping around the girl's petite form. Suddenly the world around him was warm, and Chat Noir felt like he belonged.

[we-pay-for-everything]

top five rebecca/nathaniel moments?

By episode:

I’m Finding My Bliss: Nathaniel singing Rebecca’s song is the most fucking amazing thing he ever did for her, and that almost kiss afterwards was just icing on the cake! They’ve both grown so much, and late season 4 proves how good Rebecca and Nathaniel can be for each other. 

I Have a Date Tonight: I love Rebecca and Nathaniel’s date, especially the silly dance they do. It warms my heart. It’s so adorable and awesome-sauce! Nathaniel is romantic the way Rebecca enjoys, and he knows her so well. Rebecca can relax around Nathaniel and get him to give up on his control a little bit, and accept the imperfection of life. They’re very similar: dramatic, hard on themselves, competitive, intelligent, witty...which makes their scenes so enjoyable, because they’re very different too. Rebecca is goofier and Nathaniel is more realistic. 

Nathaniel Is Irrelevant.: I don’t like Rebecca and Nathaniel’s song about not taking responsibility for their actions (it represents the worst of both characters and their relationship), but I love the two of them confessing their love, and Nathaniel standing by Rebecca. It’s an important scene for them. Nathaniel was with Rebecca for a long time: 8 months of sneaking around, plus a little bit more. Neither Josh, nor Greg, dated Rebecca for that long. I feel like Nathaniel is such an important part of the show and of Rebecca’s journey, precisely because he is present for the big moments like Rebecca pleading guilty. 

Josh Is the Man of My Dreams, Right?: This is the beginning of their story, and I love how Nathaniel challenges Rebecca to realize that she’s in love with a fantasy and not with Josh. For better or for worse, Nathaniel always challenges Rebecca and throws her a bit off balance. I also love the elevator kiss, the bonding over Harry Potter, and them establishing their fun yet serious repartee. 

To Josh, With Love.: This episode made me a shipper, and Strip Away My Conscience drove it home. I remember thinking Rebecca’s little strip was both hilarious and erotic. I love Nathaniel’s facial expressions. He’s turned on by her, yet also confused and exasperated, because Rebecca is so theatrical (like he says, she speaks like an old-timey detective). It’s classic Nathaniel and Rebecca.

Thanks for the ask!! I loooove them.

[albinokittens300]

Name: ? (Couldn’t think of one, sorry everyone)

Rating: K/ PG

Summery: Newt remembers his bond with Leta, and how it effects him still. Set several 

Ship- Newt x Leta, with minor Newtina. Angsty though and through. Without a happy ending, as well.

A/N- So, I don’t like this I am going to be 100% honest. Miserable to write. Please feel free to send all the hate because I defiantly deserve it at forcing myself to write this. Like, lay it on me. I am ready. That said, basically I have been thinking A LOT about Newt and Letas relationship, and what would happen if they did have a romantic relationship in the past. This is what I came up with. Note that this is my opinion, though. And again, I can understand hating it. Believe me this Newtina shipper would have loved to make this a but happier...I just couldn’t think of how. 

He loved Tina. So much. In all his life, he had never met a witch more trustworthy, or kind. She deserved the entire world, Newt knew that well.

Which is why he wished sometimes she hadn’t said yes. Or considered himself selfish for asking to marry her in the first place. Even if he liked to think she was happy with him.

But she deserved much better than him.

Much more than being with him, who had already given his heart to someone else. Even if she had been laid to rest several years before. Tina deserved a man who loved her without doubts or thoughts of another woman. Not that he ever was unfaithful. But when he considered what could have been, and the memories of Leta Lestrange, it felt like he was.

Newt didn't like that Leta still was with him. That some nights all he could think about is their time together. Her humming as she waited for him to finish paperwork and reports from his awful first job at the ministry. Sneaking her out of her fathers home, even for a little while. All the time they spent simply enjoying one another. They had been so happy, it was hard to also remember they decided they were better off apart.

Because to this day, Newt Scamander didn’t know if it was true. Or if could ever manage to love anyone like he had loved Leta.

Those are the days when he wants to pack his things and leave. Write Tina a letter about how wonderful and amazing she is and how he is the uncommitted one. Plead with her to please find someone who can be as loving to her as she is to them.

Then Tina smiles at him, and Newt allows himself to be a coward again.

Not all days are like it. Some days he could be with Tina and think perhaps thing worked out more perfectly then in dreams.

Others still, he drowns in the past so much it convinces him he was unworthy of the present.

[missing-my-griffin]

“I can’t lose you too.” “Too bad you were never that devoted to Gina.” “Here we go again: pleading for the life of a traitor...who you love.” “Betraying you was her biggest regret. She’s showing me that because she doesn’t want you to make the same mistake she did.” (Later confirmed that it’s Bellamy by Clarke specifically ordering E, “Go save him”). We have literally had every single serious love interest Bellamy or Clarke had lumped with bellarke and compared to it in the dialogue. Wow.

actually, that last one is what really hits home. For me. The “I can’t lose you too” was a Finn comparison, but it could have been non romantic love and deep caring. The Gina thing, well, at this point Bellamys romantic love was obvious. It could have been (probably was..) a dig BOTH at the fact that Bellamy was more committed to his platonic relationship with Clarke, whom he admired (his “queen”..), than he was to Gina, as well as a call out bc he was clearly more in love with Clarke than Gina. But since it was always Clarke’s “canon” love for Bellamy that hovered somewhere undefined between friendship and grand star crossed type of love, I have a thing for when she gets called out.

Thinking about it, it hasn’t happened a lot. “Her friends are her weakness. Start with Bellamy Blake” did put Bellamy on top of Clarkes list, however it was explicitly non romantic. Finn sensed something off with Clarke in regards to Bellamy and Lexa did too, but that story was always told so dodgy and evasive and ambiguous! So I loved that scene in S5. I am/was a huge Clexa fan and actually, a Clexa shippers (Or Lexa fan) POV makes this so beautiful!

It’s the most explicit verbal call out from someone else we’ve ever gotten. Lexa was cutthroat, diplomatic and goal oriented. Lexa wasn’t the type of person who felt bad for making a strategic move and betraying an enemy. Lexa’s regret, the ONLY reason for her regret was how in love she was with Clarke. Betraying her was the biggest mistake she ever made, a mistake that haunted her. A mistake actually, that made her grow kinder and stronger and believe in love? That same mistake however made Clarke slowly become cruel and cynical. This wrapped up that storyline, by directly comparing S5 Clarke to Lexa and S5 Bellamy to Clarke pre MW betrayal. 

It was the first undeniable confirmation we got. Because how freaking else could this be interpreted??? Lexa regretting having betrayed Clarke wasnt some kind of “It’s bad to betray people” ethics lesson. Lexa never felt bad because she thought what she did was wrong morally - just like Clarke never felt that way in regards to Bellamy. They felt bad because they didn’t choose what mattered to them the most. Clarke was more important to Lexa than her people, yet she chose them because she thought it was the right thing to do. Clarke chose not risking Madis life in any way shape or form, and was willing to leave Bellamy behind to die to follow through. It wasn’t what she wanted, though. The message here isn’t “be the good guys and be truthful” yada yada, it’s “listen to your heart and if making the right/ most rational choice means betraying the person you’re in love with, don’t do it. It will kill you and it’s not worth it”.

Is my Bellarke trash soul still craving something so in-your-face-undoubtedly-clear that it could never be denied and any way? Sure. But this was pretty damn close.

[eledritch]

How do you feel that sheith was kinda destroyed - a fellow sad sheith shipper

Here’s the thing, anon - I don’t at all feel that sheith is dead or anything like that bc of the “You’re my brother. I love you” line. In fact it just reaffirmed my love for sheith :’) @arahir made a great point about this before the season dropped - the whole brotherly or sisterly love thing is something that’s pretty common among queer ppl. 

Like...let me give an example from my own life. I was in denial about being bi until I was a sophomore/junior in high school. When I was in 8th grade (and then again in 9th), I was very close friends with a girl who I soon realized I had romantic feelings for, but I was a) in denial, b) didn’t want to ruin our friendship or her image of me, and c) didn’t even know how to properly articulate the emotions and love I felt for her. 

So I told her she was like my sister. Because I wanted her to know that she meant more to me than just a friend. Even ‘best friend’ didn’t quite seem honest enough. I have a younger sibling, and my love for her is so much more than the love I have for any of my friends.

When Keith says Shiro is like a brother to him, could he literally just mean that - that his feelings for Shiro are brotherly and nothing else? Sure. I’m not ruling out the possibility, but...their relationship and interactions are SO romantically coded, at least to me, that it seems.....improbable. It’s also far more in character for Keith to a) be in denial, b) didn’t want to ruin their friendship or Shiro’s image of him, and c) didn’t even know how to properly articulate the emotions and love Keith felt for him. 

Also, think about the context - Shiro’s clone just hit Keith with perhaps one of the harshest things Shiro could ever say to him - “I should have abandoned you just like your parents did. They saw that you were broken. Worthless. I should have seen it too.” 

In essence - “I should have given up on you like everyone else.” 

And Keith just took it, he put on a brave face, because he was trying to set aside his own feelings to save Shiro. But he was made really vulnerable by that; emotionally vulnerable by Shiro’s words and by Shiro’s cruelty towards him. Shiro was the one person Keith had allowed himself to be vulnerable with, so I can’t even imagine how betrayed, terrified, and upset he was.

If he loves Shiro (well, heh, we already know he definitely loves Shiro, thank you season 6), and by that I mean, loves him as more than a brother, then he didn’t feel able to say that in that moment. But he wanted, perhaps even needed Shiro to know he loved him. 

We’ve seen this before - in the Blade of Marmora episode, when the vision of Shiro was cruel to Keith, Keith responded with the same defense mechanism. This time, because it was obviously a more intense situation and Shiro’s life (and Keith’s) was on the line, he also said “I love you.” So I think Keith’s getting there in terms of coming to terms with how he feels, but after being nearly killed, scarred, and betrayed by Shiro, it makes sense that his heart wouldn’t be able to bear the pain of Shiro laughing in his face when Keith revealed his true feelings. It would be harder for Shiro to deny that they’re like brothers, yknow? Much easier for him to break Keith’s heart with a rejection.

As for anyone trying to claim they’re biological brothers - oh, boy. Firstly, there are some pretty racist implications of jumping to that conclusion so readily, @otasucc explains that quite nicely. 

Besides, setting aside the gross racist implications of insisting the two Asian coded characters MUST be brothers, Krolia didn’t recognize Shiro. And it was implied Keith’s father died (we’ll see, believe me I hope he’s still out there), so....doesn’t seem to be a whole lot of room for biological broganes out there. 

@fenri has a very interesting theory that Keith and Shiro were in the same foster home, but Shiro aged out of it, leaving Keith there, and then likely pulling some strings to get Keith to the Garrison (this was hinted at in the Garrison flashback). 

Just because Shiro is a familial figure for Keith doesn’t invalidate Sheith somehow, and it’s infuriating to me that people think it does. Families love each other. Keith and Shiro built their own little family together. Krolia says as much when she meets Shiro and thanks him for helping to raise Keith into the man he is, and says Keith has told her a lot about Shiro. 

Also? It’s infuriating that of EVERYTHING incredible from that beautiful scene - the heartwrenching fight between them, Keith constantly on the defense trying not to hurt him, Keith pleading with him, Kuron goading him on and trying to break him, Keith never giving up on him because Shiro never gave up on him, the gorgeous fighting animation, the gorgeous scenery, the music, the dialogue, the expressions, the voice acting....out of ALL OF THAT, the most this fandom seems to be taking away is a single line about Shiro being Keith’s brother. 

Miss me with that shit. Appreciate this beautiful scene for what it is - a declaration of emotion and the culmination of every interaction between these two since the first season - instead of shoving your “proof” that Sheith is over down everyone’s throats. Romance is not the point of this show and never was. Things being canon also isn’t the point. Watching the show and enjoying it, critiquing it thoughtfully, and being inspired to create more content because of it is the point. Don’t forget that.

This isn’t aimed at you, anon, and please don’t be sad. This was a good season and I for one enjoyed it a lot. Regardless of what the writers plan to do, Keith & Shiro’s relationship makes my heart very warm and fond. Whatever they have between them is something special and I’m so glad that they got a happy ending this season :’)

Oh, and here’s a cool parallel I noticed ;)

I will leave you with that