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seokkgenie · 7 years ago

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More Than Anything Else (one) [M]

Pairing: Namjoon x Reader

Genre: CEO!au, smut, fluff, angst

Words: 13.2 k

one

In hindsight, sleeping with a stranger that you met in a bar one night before you started a new job was probably not the best of ideas.

Your hands were gripping his toned biceps as he pounded into you. The room was filled with your moans and his low grunts. His sculpted face was shimmering under the cheap orange hue of the motel room light with the beads of his sweat. You could almost imagine the state that you were probably in, with your pink lips swollen, pupils dilated and your hair a tangled mess.

“You know,” he said, gripping your waist and increasing his pace, “I don’t usually do this.” The sudden change in momentum elicited a moan from your mouth.

“What?” you managed to breathe out, “Sex?”

“Sex with strangers.” He said, correcting you. Your nails dug into his skin as you reached up to suck on the soft flesh just above his collar bone.

“Right now, I can’t seem to remember why.” He completed.

You smirked at his comment. You could feel pressure building in your abdomen and you knew that it wouldn’t be long until you’d reach your climax. He seemed to be struggling to keep himself from coming undone as well, his eyes now closed in pleasure. His hands moved down between your legs and began to play with your clit, the gentle pressure from his fingers was enough to push you off the edge and you felt pleasure overtaking your body in waves underneath him.

You clenched around his penis and he moaned loudly before he was coming undone too, his body trembling from the orgasm. He slammed into you a few more times, which helped both of you to ride out your high. When you came down from your climax, he moved just in time to avoid falling on top of you and he lay on his stomach, panting. You looked up at the corny designs on the ceiling as you tried to compose yourself.

You turned your head slightly to look at the man and you saw him pulling off the soiled condom and throwing it into the bin next to the bed. He went into the bathroom directly and you heaved a sigh of relief as he left you alone for a few minutes. You quickly put on your clothes again, picking them up from their place on the floor. You sat down at the edge of the bed, thinking about what the best thing to do next would be.

You weren’t used to one night stands. You had no idea what the appropriate code of conduct was after the meaningless sex. Were you supposed to just leave without saying anything or were you supposed to say something nice or clever? You scoffed at the thought, what would you say anyway? ‘That was some good fucking, sexy stranger?’

You sighed in frustration. You couldn’t believe that the stress of your transfer and the stories you heard about your to-be boss made you want to find a release via sex with someone you didn’t even know. You reasoned with yourself that it was okay, that it was good sex and you always had been one to take risks.

You decided to let him react first. Just in case you had to leave in a hurry, though, you put your phone in your purse and fixed yourself up the best that you could, pulling out a hair tie from the bag and tying your hair into a ponytail.

The door to the bathroom creaked open, startling you and you gave out a small yelp without meaning to.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” He muttered as he picked up his clothes that were lying askew on the ground.

You didn’t respond to him and just observed him closely, your lips placing themselves between your teeth due to the nervousness.

After he pulled on his pants and buttoned up his shirt, he held his coat in his hand and looked at you. His large, dark eyes pierced into your own, but you didn’t feel the need to look away. He ran his hand through his light brown hair.

He cleared his throat, and said, “I should get going now.” He waited for your reaction, probably hoping that you weren’t some sort of clingy person who would demand to keep seeing him.

“Okay.” You said and his mouth opened slightly in surprise, as though he wasn’t expecting you to agree to it that easily

You shrugged, “That was fun.”

“Y-yeah.” He said, unsure, and gave a brisk nod and a small wave before heading out the door. You waited for ten minutes to make sure you didn’t run into him outside and made your way out, hailing a cab.

You checked the time. 3:23 am. You had to report to your first day of work in the new branch in less than five hours. Sometimes, you wanted to punch yourself for constantly making impulsive and stupid decisions.

The building stood tall and mighty just like a typical workplace of any other giant conglomerate such as your employer. It was easy to get sucked into the glitz and glamour of the glass offices with their promise of job security and stable income. But, you were no stranger to the real struggle that went on behind the doors.

You had worked for the top shareholder of the company, the President himself. You were the youngest person to ever be appointed as the assistant of the President of Bangtan Corporation. You didn’t know why, but you had impressed him so much during your interview that he had personally demanded that you be assigned as his new assistant. Shadowing him throughout the work day, sitting in on all his meetings and making notes diligently kept your place at the office secure. You were so efficient that you demanded respect from the employees, even the sexist ones who looked down upon secretaries and thought them to be useless women who wouldn’t be capable of doing much if they did not have the looks to support them.

You knew the company inside out, and you were proud of how far you had come from being a doe eyed rookie with big dreams to a hard headed realist who was ambitious.

A few months ago, the President had announced during an elaborate press conference that his eldest son would be taking over the company after him. Nobody had seen the young heir to the conglomerate throne. Everyone had heard rumors, though, that he was somewhat of a genius, an all-rounder who was a perfectionist in school. He had apparently finished his undergraduate degree from the London School of Economics followed by an impressive degree from Harvard Business School.

You had remembered thinking that no matter how smart this man was, he would not be able to take over easily. It was a well-known fact that most employees detested the fact that their new boss would be someone who rose to the position only as a birth right rather than due to his own capabilities.

To your complete surprise, he had proved everyone wrong. He had single handedly planned and executed a project that had saved Bangtan Mills from complete bankruptcy. He had done all this in just a few months’ time and even though he stayed away from the public’s eye during this time, he had become somewhat of a legend-a mysterious one, whose face everyone was dying to see.

That stint at the Mills seemed to have proved to everyone that he was more than capable of leading the multinational conglomerate and he had been appointed as the CEO of Bangtan Corporation a week ago. He still needed someone to help him ease into the process, though. Someone that knew the way the company worked and could work beside him. The President had chosen you as worthy of that.

That’s the reason you stood outside the company headquarters in Seoul, already missing the salty sea air of Busan where had you previously worked.

You would be the new Assistant of the CEO, effective from that day. The only problem was that you were still a little sore from your activities from the previous night, sleep deprived with swollen eyes that took a lot of makeup to cover up and hair still partially wet from the late shower you had to take due to over sleeping.

You let out a few deep breaths and walked into the building. The security had been instructed to let you in and direct you towards HR which was on the fifth floor. You got into the elevator quickly and as it moved up, you closed your eyes and held your breath. You hated elevators, having had numerous panic attacks there as a child due to your claustrophobia. The sound of the doors opening had brought you back to your senses and you leaped out happily. You straightened your work clothes and pulled your purse closer and you strut into the collection of cubicles. You walked towards the cabin that belonged to the HR Manager. You were a special employee and the Manager had been assigned to help you settle in on your first day.

You knocked on the door and a woman said, “Come in.”

You walked in, smiling and gave a slight bow, following which you introduced yourself, “I’m Y/n. I’ll be working as the CEO’s assistant. Please take care of me.”

She smiled and got up from her seat, returning your bow. She extended her hand and you placed your own in hers’ shaking it, “I’m Park Jihyo. Nice to meet you, y/n. I’ve heard very good things about you.”

“That’s very kind of you.” You said as she gestured for you to take a seat. She began opening a drawer near her and pulled out a file. She read through it briefly and pulled out an envelope and handed it to you.

“This has your employee ID card and a few other things. Please let me know if there’s any problem with it.” She said.

You nodded, standing up. “Thank you, Ms Park.” You said.

She stood up along with you and smiled, “I’ll drop you to the CEO’s cabin.”

You were really flustered. “There’s really no need for that.” You said quickly. “I couldn’t trouble the HR Manager with such a thing.”

“Please, I insist.” She said and you stood speechlessly as she walked towards the door, her black heels clinking on the floor. She adjusted her pencil skirt before opening the door and gestured you to walk out first. You were unable to understand why she was doing all this for a assistant when she probably had more important matters to tend to. But, you followed her silent instructions anyway and soon enough you were both standing outside the elevators.

“Ms Park,” you called out to her, “Are you sure this is okay?”

“Don’t worry, Ms Y/n.” she gave you a reassuring smile and you nodded. As the elevator opened, you breathed in, holding your breath and walking in. There was a frown on your face as you waited for the dreaded ride to end.

“You okay?” she asked, looking at your obvious discomfort.

“Yes, sorry, I just hate elevators.” You explained and she nodded understandingly, looking over at you with concern in her eyes.

When the door finally opened at the top most floor-the 12th floor, you jumped out again, almost bumping into the employees waiting outside. You apologized quickly and tried to regain your composure.

Jihyo watched and gave you some time, after which she said, “Can I ask you something, Ms y/n?”

“Yes, ma’am, of course!” you quickly replied, facing her.

“Why are you wearing pants?” she asked, her eyes looking into your own.

You tilted your head in confusion. You had not been expecting that question. “Sorry?” you questioned her.

She laughed, “That didn’t come out how I intended it to. I meant, why are you wearing slacks instead of a skirt? I’ve never met a assistant who wears pants to work, especially on her first day.”

You shrugged, “It’s just more comfortable. I think all secretaries should do it, what with all the running around that we have to do. Also, I don’t like how it aids the objectification of women in this line of work.” You concluded by saying, “Besides, I don’t remember there being any company policy about a dress code.”

Maybe going on a rant about not wanting to wear a skirt was probably not the best thing to do infront of the HR Manager who was wearing said item of clothing. But, you were nothing if not unnecessarily adamant about your beliefs.

To your relief, Jihyo smiled, her big eyes wide with amusement. “I think we’re going to get along really well, y/n” she said.

“I…’ you trailed off, unsure of how to respond.

“Let me give you some advice to mark the beginning of our new friendship.” She said and you listened intently, curious as to what she had to say. “The CEO is kind of an asshole. So, try to not talk back to him. It makes everyone’s lives easier.” She added, as an afterthought, “Although, with your personality, I don’t think it’s going to be possible.”

You were unsure if she was complimenting you or insulting you, but you decided to just thank her and get to work. You had heard from a lot of people that the new CEO was kind of a jerk, but you figured that it wouldn’t be anything that you couldn’t handle.

“Thank you, Ms Park.” You said, smiling.

She replied, pointing to the room at the center of the floor, past the cubicles, “That’s the devil’s den. Good luck, y/n.” As you bowed and began to walk away, she called you, “And, y/n, please, it’s Jihyo to you.”

You nodded in response, grateful for her kindness.

The employees sitting at the cubicles looked at you as you walked past and you bowed to them politely. Most of them bowed back, and you could swear that you saw pity in their eyes. You shrugged it off and knocked on the door of the CEO, your heart was beating loudly with anticipation. You were finally going to see the face behind the mysterious Kim Namjoon.

“Yes?” a deep voice sounded from inside and you opened the door, walking in whilst looking down at the floor politely. You were too used to the forms of respect in this country. You approached him and said, “Good morning, Sir. I’m y/n, I’ll be your assistant from today. Please take care of me.”

You waited for him to answer, still looking down. But he didn’t respond and a silent pause filled the large room. You took that as your cue to look up and the first thing that you felt was as though someone had punched you in your gut. You let out an involuntary gasp. You suppressed the urge to scream, your previously fast paced heartbeat was beating more erratically and you felt like your heart would jump out of your chest at any given moment.

There, sitting in front of you as your new boss was the sexy stranger from last night.

“Fuck,” you whispered, unable to hold back your tongue. He seemed to be shocked too. His eyes were wide with recognition and he looked paler than you remember him being. He was obviously very baffled as well.

He cleared his throat after what felt like an eternity and said, “It’s nice to meet you, Ms y/n. I’ve heard a lot about you from my father.”

You looked at him, as though he were crazy. One minute he had been astonished and speechless and the next minute he went on like nothing had happened.

“T-Thank you, sir.” You stuttered.

“Get settled into your desk outside and someone will give you a memo about what your job here will entail.” He said, His voice was stable and sure, a complete contrast from how he sounded the night before.

You nodded, still in shock. Your luck always edged on being rotten, but this was a new one, even for you. The one time that you decided to have some fun and go ahead to sleep with a stranger, he turns out to be your boss. Wonderful.

He raised an eyebrow at you, but you couldn’t reply.

“Anything else, Ms y/n?” he asked. He snapped his fingers in order to gain your attention and the action pulled you out of your trance.

“N-no, sir.” You replied, eyes shaking.

“Then, you can leave.” He said with a slight brush of his hand, the wave motioning you out.

It almost seemed demeaning, like he thought you were a lowly creature that he could boss around with gestures. You didn’t say anything, but a bitter taste was left in your mouth as you managed to bow and walk out.

Instead of sitting at your desk, you walked briskly towards the washroom, following the sign on the wall. You knew that you needed to be alone to collect your thoughts and you couldn’t do that in your seat where everyone was bound to come up to you to socialize.

As soon as you entered the washroom, you sighed in relief that it was empty. You stood in front of the mirror, breathing loudly. Your nerves had taken a hit, seeing that man sitting there on that chair.

Breathe, you told yourself. It is going to be okay.

He seemed to find it easy to complete forget what had happened between the pair of you. All you had to do was pretend like nothing happened. It wasn’t like you dated him or anything, it was just casual, meaningless sex. How difficult could it be to ignore? You looked into the mirror and nodded. You put your fists in front of you, cheering yourself on. It was time to be professional-something you were confident that you could do perfectly.

You walked out with a new found determination and sat down in your seat. To your chagrin, your cubicle was the closest one to the CEO’s cabin and although it faced away from his door, you were certain that, from the inside, anyone would have a clear view of your space. Not that it mattered because why would the CEO and son of the President of such a big conglomerate care about what an easily replaceable assistant is doing?

An older woman walked upto your desk with a smile and introduced herself as Mrs Oh. She handed you a file, sticky notes of various colours sticking out from different pages of it.

“It’s the boss’s schedule and the details on our current projects,” she explained. You thanked her for her hard work and she left after saying, “Good luck, love. We’re all rooting for you.”

Another voice said, “yeah!” from behind you and you almost jumped up from your seat, startled. You looked around to find the source of the voice and you find a man, similar in age, smiling back at you. His hair was light pink and fell onto his forehead effortlessly. His bright hair seemed to be completely out of place in the uneventful office, as did his smile that turned his eyes into half-moons.

“Hey!” he said, cheerfully. “I’m Jimin!” His voice was soft and melodious and you found yourself smiling and greeting him back.

“Hello. I’m y/n. Nice to meet you.”

He shook your outstretched hand vigorously and said, “I work right there,” he pointed down the hallway, “If you need anything, just come over and ask.”

“That’s really nice of you.” You replied, flipping through the pages of the file. You hesitated, frowning at the mess of a document, “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure!” he replied, still smiling.

“Why is everyone being extra nice to me?” you asked.

He laughed and looked at you, amused. “You didn’t hear this from me,” he said and you tilted your head in confusion. He leaned down and whispered into your ear, taking you aback, “Our boss is kind of a jerk.”

You still looked at him, speechless and he winked at you before saying, “You’ll see! Good luck, y/n.” He walked away and you couldn’t help but stare at his retreating figure wondering how bad Kim Namjoon could be that everyone in the office seemed to want to warn you away.

You found out how bad the man in question was sooner than you had anticipated. It was bad enough that you had to pretend to have never met him before when in fact you had slept with the man less than twenty four hours ago, but on top of that you had to start your job on the day when there was a big inter departmental meeting in the office.

You sat next to the CEO, trying to take down notes and understand what each department head was presenting, but it was hopeless. You couldn’t make head or tail about anything, having had no time to prepare or no prior knowledge about marketing strategies-the topic of discussion that day. You tried to scribble down everything, unable to discern what is important from what is not. You even caught Jihyo smiling at you encouragingly, but you knew you were screwed.

So, of course at the end of the day, you couldn’t help but submit a half-assed report of the meeting to Mr Kim, readying yourself to get yelled at for the low quality work that you knew you had done. To your surprise, he didn’t yell at you, he glanced over the report and then at your face. He sighed and handed the papers back to you. “I assume you know that this is a horrible report, Ms y/n.”

“S-sorry, Mr Kim.” You stuttered. You hated this entire situation. The one thing you could always pride yourself about was how good you were at your job. You felt horrible that you couldn’t show your best work on the first day at your new job.

He sighed, “Were you aware that I had a meeting with Mr Conrad at 4 pm today?”

“I….” you trailed off, trying to remember what his schedule was for the day.

“Why wasn’t I made aware of this?” he questioned, without waiting for a response.

“I’m sorry, sir.” That was all you could manage to say.

He looked at you as you hung your head down in shame. He said, “This is the first and last time, Ms y/n.” he said and you looked up at him, biting your lip. “I’m going to let it go this time since it’s your first day. But, keep in mind that I won’t be tolerating such shoddy work in the future.”

“I apologize for today, sir.” You said, making a mental note to never mess up again.

“You’re now the CEO’s assistant. This means that you have to be better than the best. I don’t care what my father has to say about you, I have to see for myself how capable you are before I trust you.”

“Of course, sir.” You grit your teeth. He was slowly crossing the line. It was your first day. Was it so difficult to give you a day to adjust to a new job?

“You may leave.” He said, looking into his laptop. You turn around ready to leave, anger bubbling inside you when he says, “Also…”

“Yes, sir?” you ask, looking towards him again.

“Last night never happened.” He stated, his voice was lower this time.

You didn’t reply, so he prodded for an answer. “Are we on the same page?”

You took a second to answer and replied, “Yes, sir. Absolutely.”

He gave a brief nod and you left, closing the door to his cabin and sitting down at your cubicle. Your palms were white now due to how hard you had clenched them. You scoffed and wondered how you did not figure out that he was such a fucking jerk when you had had sex with him. You were usually pretty perceptive, owing to the nature of your job.

You made a vow to yourself that day. You would give your two hundred percent to this job. More than anything, you wanted to prove to Kim Namjoon that you weren’t some pushover that he could bully just because he was your boss. You would be the best assistant that anyone has ever had, so fucking great that he won’t be able to do any work without you.

You used to love monsoon as a child. It still reminded you of fond memories of staring outside the school bus while it rained, breathing in the scent of the wet ground and being filled with hope for your future and dreams of great life experiences that were yet to happen.

Clearly, standing at the counter of a coffee shop, ordering a double shot Americano at seven in the fucking morning while it rained outside had never been a part of those dreams. You had barely slept in the past week, reaching home at midnight and being up and about before the sun even came up.

You thanked the barista and moved towards the door, unfurling your umbrella and running as fast as you could towards the office building holding onto the cup filled with the hot liquid.

Even though you had been taking the elevator for well over a month, you couldn’t get used to it. It still felt suffocating and you spent the ride closing your eyes and counting down until the doors would open at the top floor.

You got out, breathing a sigh of relief and walked towards your boss’s cabin. You knocked on the door twice and you went in.

Kim Namjoon was a good looking man, no one could argue about that. But, in his current state, he looked less like the CEO and more like a vagabond. His clothes were crumpled and dirty, his hair was greasy and completely untamed while his complexion had become pale which brought out the dark circles under his sharp eyes.

“I brought you coffee.” You stated, smiling at him.

He put his hand forward, grabbing it from your hand and taking a sip of it. “That feels nice.” He murmured and you almost felt like waking up at the ass crack of dawn for this was worth it.

He continued, “What are you doing here at this time, y/n?”

You shrugged, “You’ve been here all night working for this meeting, sir. I thought you would like some coffee.”

He seemed surprised, but didn’t say anything. “I do like the coffee. Thank you.”

Being by his side throughout the day for over a month, you had realized that there were times when the arrogant CEO would suddenly take a back seat and a nice, gentlemanly person would take the wheel. It was almost as if he had two personalities and he always managed to startle you. You were good at observing people and discerning their personalities, but Kim Namjoon was still an enigma that you couldn’t fully understand no matter how much you tried.

After realizing that you hadn’t replied within an appropriate amount of time, you said. “It’s the least I could do.” After a pause, you added, “Sir, do you want to hear your schedule for the day?”

“Go ahead.” he replied, taking in the coffee.

You pulled out your iPad from your bag and cleared your throat. But before you could begin to read out the details that you had stored in it, you were cut off by Namjoon’s coughing. You looked at him, a little taken aback. But, you steadied yourself by reminding yourself that he was also human, even though he barely acted like it and that he too could fall ill.

You began reading, “You have a meeting with the marketing department at noon and a conference call with the Busan office at 3. I took the liberty of cancelling other, less pressing meetings this week since you’ll be busy preparing for the presentation in front of the board. I hope that’s okay.”

He nodded, “Yes, that’s alright. This merger is more important than anything else at the moment.”

You understood what weightage this presentation held for him. It was the first time he would be addressing the board of directors as the CEO and he probably felt an immense amount of pressure to make the merger of a smaller company called Kim Electricals with Bangtan Corporations a success.

You had to give him credit for all the hard work that he was putting into the project. He had been working late every day for the last week, reading, re-reading and reviewing every little detail. The man had worked himself sick, for crying out loud. Of course, being his assistant meant that your life would become difficult whenever his did. To keep true to your resolution, you did everything possible to be the perfect assistant. You even did things that he didn’t ask of you, but required nonetheless. You didn’t give him a single chance to complain or to doubt your ability.

“Is there anything that I can help with, Mr Kim?” you asked, ready to get started on the work day.

He looked at you for a moment and said, “Your day doesn’t start until 9.”

“My day starts when yours does.” You stated and he gave a hint of a smile at the remark, although it was so brief that you thought you had imagined it.

“Alright, then.” He said. “Why don’t you take these files from sales and compile the reports based on month and year?” You had to pause and look at him as he was overcome with another coughing fit, sniffing his nose after his body had calmed down.

“Alright, sir. I’ll get on it right away.” You said, not pointing out his current state, but picking up a few of the files and carrying them to your desk. It was one of the days when you had decided to wear a pencil skirt and heels and you regretted your choice as soon as you realized how much you would have to walk back and forth during the busy day.

Namjoon seemed to have put his attention back to the papers that he had been occupied with when you had come in. You wished he could have been kind enough to let you sort out the reports in his office, thereby allowing you to avoid carrying them in batches to your desk, but Namjoon was anything but kind when it came to privacy and you felt stupid for expecting anything from him.

When you were picking up the last of the files after several trips back and forth, you gave a quick glance towards him and your eyes were suddenly looking into his dark ones. He seemed to be thinking deeply, his eyes trained on you. As soon as he noticed your gaze, he looked away, clearing his throat and pretending like he had not looked up from his file at all. You didn’t confront him about it, either, because god knows you’ve looked at him a lot more than he ever has. Sometimes memories from the first night that you had met him would pop into your head and you couldn’t help but stare at his beautiful face and his long limbs or the veins on his hands that showed every time he would roll up the sleeves of his dress shirt. Most of all, you often found it hard to not stop and stare at his deep dimples that appeared on his cheeks when he smiled.

You had to hold back the unintentional satisfaction that surged in your body when you realized that maybe you were not the only one who was sexually frustrated. It couldn’t amount to anything, of course. He was your boss and this was an important job for you. But, little victories were all that made you happy in the past few days and you walked with a smirk on your face as you moved towards your now cluttered desk. You began reading the dates etched on the files, sighing as you arranged them in the order of their creation.

Before you knew it, the first of the early arriving employees had begun to filter into the office, some of them looking towards you with a smile, and others eyeing you with pity. The mundane task that you were occupied with was wearing you out just by how boring it really was, the numbers now swirling in front of your eyes, the names a muddled pool of letters. You decided that it was time for a coffee break and decided to go to the employee break room of the floor.

You got up, stretching slightly and fighting the urge to rub your eyes. You began sauntering towards the break room, heels clicking on the wooden floor. When you entered the room, you were greeted by familiar heads turning to look at you. Jimin was smiling as he sat in a chair with a bagel in his hand while Lisa was scrolling through her phone, standing next to him.

“Early day?” Jimin asked and you nodded as you made your way to the coffee machine.

Lisa flashed her bright smile at you, “Hey! I haven’t seen you in forever!”

You scoffed, smelling your strong coffee, stirring a spoon of sugar into it, “I haven’t been out and about in forever, all thanks to my extra hard-working, stuck up, boss.”

“It can’t be that bad!” she chirped. Her constant positivity baffled you on the daily.

Jimin piped up in your defense, “Spending all day with Kim Namjoon doesn’t exactly translate to an easy and dandy time.”

“At least he’s hot.” She mused and you almost spit out your coffee.

Jimin’s face had formed a frown at her remark and he said, “If you’re into the whole demanding, serious, broody kind.”

“Jimin,” Lisa said, suddenly serious, “who isn’t into the tall, rich, and young CEO of a big conglomerate?”

He shook his head in disdain and you watched their exchange in silence. From the corner of the room, a woman’s voice suddenly boomed, “I don’t know about that, Lisa. He’s quite a handful.”

You traced the source of the voice to find Ms Lee, the head of accounting standing near the mini refrigerator accompanied by Mina, an accountant from her team. They were known in the office as quite the loud mouths, famous as the resident office gossips. You had even heard from Jimin that when Namjoon first started as the CEO, Mina had flirted with him relentlessly and made moves on him in the welcome party, but he had rejected her completely. Since then, she was open to hear any sort of information about him, ready to find something humiliating enough to get her vengeance.

Mina gave her two cents that no one had asked for, “He’s so uptight, it’s like he’s 70.”

You weren’t a very big fan of Kim Namjoon either, but you couldn’t stand hearing her insulting him for some reason. Maybe it was a sense of loyalty that had developed as you worked with him seeing how dedicated and hard-working he was. You believed in giving people credit when it was due. You said, interrupting the backbiting session that a simple coffee run had turned into. “He’s just serious about the work. I think it’s necessary, don’t you?”

Mina’s eyes widened in surprise, as did Jimin’s. He was privy to your constant ranting about your boss and you defending him was clearly peculiar. Ms Lee said, “I’m sure you know better than us, y/n, but he’s the most bossy executive that I’ve worked under. Besides, he’s always so serious. I mean, lighten up a little, am I right?”

You shrugged, “I think it’s what keeps the company working.”

“What do you mean?” Lisa asked, her smile returning, curiosity edged in her voice.

“I mean, he’s young and new. There are so many employees here who are older and more experienced. I think he’s just trying his best to make them see that he’s not some silly youngster with bright ideas who can be humored. You know how strict this country is with the whole age thing. If he isn’t a hardass, no one would listen to him.” You realized that the room had become so silent that if you dropped a pin, it could have been heard. You had surprised yourself with what you had said, but you didn’t regret it one bit. It was the truth, after all.

“Besides, I think he’s quite fair and only gets all domineering when things are done wrong. So, we just have to do our jobs well and I’m sure he only asks for reasonable things.” You realized that you had been rambling on, all attention diverted towards you and your cheeks turned a shade of pink in embarrassment. You shrugged, and awkwardly end your speech by saying, “So, yeah.”

You expected to be bombarded with opinions and questions, but instead, the tension in the room grew tenfold when the door to the lounge opened and Kim Namjoon walked in. You were frozen in place, and everyone else seemed to be too. You noticed that Mina’s eyes were wide with surprise. Jimin was the first one to break the silence, “Good morning, Mr Kim” he greeted the CEO. Namjoon gave a courteous nod towards the shorter male.

Lisa gave a small bow from her position that Namjoon returned with another brief nod.

Ms Lee, seemingly out of her state of shock, said, “Good morning, sir. Have a good day.” She bowed lightly and left the room, Mina following her out.

Namjoon began to open the cabinets, looking for something.

“Can I help you, sir?” you asked. Your cheeks were feeling hot and you were sure that they must have turned into a shade of red. You were hoping with all your might that he hadn’t been privy to the conversation that had just happened in the room before he had walked in.

He stopped his actions abruptly, looking at you directly. You had to make a conscious effort to look away from his eyes, the look he was giving you rendering you immobile.

“Just here for some coffee.” He replied, still looking at you.

“C-coffee?” you snapped out of your daze. “You don’t like the coffee here.” You stated. Namjoon hated the coffee that was available at the office. This was the reason you had spent so much time at the café down the street, ordering his takeaway caffeine two, sometimes three times a day.

He gave a small smile, his dimples appearing slightly, “y/n…” he started, “I’ve spent over 48 hours working, I’ve hardly slept for four hours, and I’m pretty sure that I’m catching a cold. Yet, I have no time to spare to eat or drink anything. I think I can make an exception and drink the coffee that is closely available to me instead of waiting on you to get me some after fifteen minutes.”

You heard Lisa exhale loudly, as though she were holding her laughter. You spared a moment to glare at her before looking back at your boss and saying, “I’m sorry, sir. I’ll make sure to make the coffee runs faster next time.”

Namjoon opened his mouth to respond, but closed it again, as though hesitating. “That…not what I meant.” He said and sighed.

You raised your eyebrows in confusion, but he didn’t explain. Instead he said, “Nevermind,” and resumed his search in the cabinets.

“Sir,” you said, moving closer and pulling out a cup from the open cabinet. “I’ll bring you some coffee. You can go back to your cabin.”

“There’s no need.” He said, grabbing onto the cup with his hand.

“Please, sir,” you insisted, “Let me.” You’d be damned if you let him have the satisfaction of criticizing your coffee bringing speed. Your grip on the cup tightened and you pulled it towards yourself.

He looked at you, and realizing that you wouldn’t back down, he let go of the cup and nodded. Not sparing Jimin and Lisa a glance, he walked towards the door, coughing a little before opening the door and going out.

Jimin let out a low whistle. “Wow. Intense.” He said, grinning. Lisa laughed at his comment.

“What?” you ask, looking at your friends.

“I can’t believe you defended him.” Jimin said, “After all the bitching I’ve had to sit through, I didn’t expect you to have such a soft spot for him.”

You groaned, “Shut up. I was just trying to be a good assistant.” Then, your eyes widened in panic, “You don’t think he heard us, do you? Oh my fucking god, I hope he didn’t. That is so embarrassing!”

Lisa shook her head, smiling, “I’m sure he would have said something if he had heard.”

You nodded, choosing to believe her. “Yeah, you’re right! Holy shit, thank you.”

“Now, bring him his coffee before he loses his mind.” Jimin stated, standing up to walk out. He gave your shoulder a small squeeze before leaving. Lisa followed him out after throwing you another bright smile.

You sighed, looking at the cup in your hand. Why did these things only happen to you? You’ve always had the worst luck, but the past few weeks have set a new record for succeeding to make your life a mess.

You poured the coffee into the cup, still hoping that he hadn’t heard a single thing that you’d said. Right before walking out, you stopped in your tracks and looked back at the mini kitchen counter. You bit your lip wondering if you should take the liberty to do what you were about to do. You stood there, convincing yourself that you had to do this, if not for the sake of his health, for the sake of all the sleepless nights that you’d had to bear with for the sake of this presentation.

You moved back to the counter, threw the contents on the cup into the sink and kept it down before pulling out a new one and pouring some hot water into it before searching for the packet of green tea bags.

When you reached Namjoon’s cabin with the cup of tea, you heard voices from inside. You knocked on the door and the voices halted before you heard him asking you to enter. You opened his door to find Jihyo sitting infront of him with a frown on her face. When she saw you, she gave a small smile, before looking back at him with a scowl.

You placed the cup infront of him, and he looked at its contents. You took a deep breath and said, “I brought you some tea. I hope that’s okay. I just thought that coffee wouldn’t help with your cold and you should be healthy for this presentation.”

You expected him to scoff and say something sarcastic, but to your surprise, he said, “That’s nice of you. Thank you.”

Your eyes widened briefly before you said, “Just doing my job.”

“Making him beverages?” Jihyo scoffed, looking at him, “Is this what you think assistants are for?” You were a little taken aback by her rash words towards the CEO.

You decided to reply on his behalf, “I insisted, Ms Park. It’s my job to make sure that he gets all the help to do his job well.”

She smiled at you. “You’re a good assistant, Ms y/n. I hate that you’re wasting away beside him.” She shook her head slowly.

Namjoon sighed. “Can we get back to work now, Jihyo? I don’t have time for this right now.” He said, running his fingers through his hair in frustration.

You took that as your cue to leave, but Namjoon stopped you. “Before you leave, y/n, could you please find the Accounts reports from this pile?” he pointed at the pile on his desk and you reached for it immediately, sifting through them to find the ones he was looking for.

“Okay.” Jihyo said, crossing her arms, “Fine. What do you want me to do?”

“All the reports of HR from the past two years are completely wrong. How am I supposed to submit this to the board?” he asked, picking up the file in front of him.

“Like I said before, there was major mishap with the system and we didn’t find the error until yesterday. We’ll need time to make the corrections to the configurations.” She explained.

“There is no time!” Namjoon replied, his tone exasperated. “You have to hand the new reports over to me by tomorrow. I need them on my desk.”

She took a deep breath in, “You want me work overtime again? I told you that you can have the reports in 2days. The board meeting isn’t until then, anyway.”

“I can’t give you two days. I need to review it and that’ll take time.” He deadpanned earning another scowl from Jihyo.

“You know,” she started after a pause, “You don’t seem like the Kim Namjoon that I grew up with. You’re just this major dickhead of a boss now.” She stated, before standing up. “You can have the reports tomorrow, but just know that I hate you now.”

She walked out without waiting for a reply. You had found the file that he had asked for, but you were still processing the new information that Jihyo and Namjoon were childhood friends. That explained a lot about her informal behavior with him and the fact that he didn’t reprimand her for it.

“y/n?” he called out, seeing you spaced out. “Is that the file in your hand?”

You nodded handing it over to him, your fingers brushing his slightly and a jolt of electricity sparked at the sudden contact making your both recoil your hands. He looked at you, picking up the cup of tea and taking a sip. “Thanks.” He said again and you felt like you were in an alternate universe where Kim Namjoon was actually capable of expressing his gratitude twice in one day.

He pinched the bridge of his nose with his fingers, sighing to himself. He couldn’t remember the last time he had been this stressed.

Actually, he did. It had been only a month ago when he had to close the deal with Min Engineering—his first ever deal as CEO. That was the first time that he had given in to the stress and had decided to let go completely when he met a woman in a bar, she was smart and her responses to his comments had been witty. That was also the first time that he had taken a woman to a hotel, solely with the purpose of having sex with her with no strings attached. It had been a fun night, the sex was great and she hadn’t tried to get his phone number afterwards.

But, the last thing he had expected was for her to be appointed as his new personal assistant.

It had been hard enough being thrust into this position of power by his family. He felt like he had been thrown into a sea of sharks, completely unarmed to fight them. The last thing he needed was to be branded as the kind of man who slept with his employees. He had a lot to prove to his family, to his company and to the world and he would be damned if he let a meaningless one night stand ruin everything for him.

Only, as time went by, it didn’t remain completely meaningless.

You were good at your job. He would never say it out loud, but you made his life easier at every step and he had become so used to your help in the past month that he couldn’t understand how he got anything done before you came into his life.

You never did anything to indicate that you had lingering thoughts about the night that you had slept together. You were professional and somehow he found himself at the disadvantaged end—the only one of the two who would get caught staring, the only one unable to stop himself from checking you out. You had wriggled your way into his life, gained his trust without him knowing it and worst of all, you took care of him.

That’s what troubled him the most. You were the only person in his life who genuinely gave a fuck about his wellness, his health and his mood. Even though you didn’t have to, you would stay up helping him, work overtime whenever he did, and gave up on your weekends even when he didn’t ask you to. You did more than what he expected from an assistant and sometimes he wondered if your mind was occupied with thoughts of him like his was with thoughts of you, but he shook those delusions away. You were just being a good personal assistant, the best one possible, which is why his father hired you for this position in the first place.

He had been occupied with these thoughts ever since he had overheard the conversation that had happened in the employee lounge early on in the during the day. He was pleasantly surprised to hear what you actually thought of him. He still felt a strange warmth in his heart when he replayed your words in his head. His inhibitions seemed to have lowered out of the blue and he found himself wanting to befriend you, to talk to you and to understand you like you had understood him.

He looked at the cup of tea in front of him. It was embarrassing that a simple gesture of worrying about his health could make his heart beat so rapidly. Even Jihyo’s tantrums couldn’t bring his mood down and that almost never happened.

He sighed again thinking of all the extra work he’d have to do because of the mess that Jihyo’s department had made. He didn’t have time to have dreamy fantasies about his assistant. He needed to look at the accounts from Kim Electricals and make sure that there were no discrepancies. He had insisted that he would do it after seeing how busy the Accounts department had been with everything that was going on.

He buried his head in the files again, making notes on his laptop whilst looking out for any emails that may require his attention.

The day went by quickly and once the conference call with the Busan office was over, he felt relieved that everything there was in perfect order. He just had to concentrate on the merger now and then he would be able to calm down for a few days.

He pouted slightly when he saw the pile of documents on his table. He would have to pull another all-nighter to go through everything.

He muttered to himself, “I knew I should have just run away when I had the chance.” He leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes, desperate to just get a good night’s sleep in his own bed. He continued talking to himself, a habit he had picked up as a child that would manifest at times of stress. The sound of the soft knock at the door was drowned by his voice. “Fuck this. Let them fire me. Let them say I’m useless.” He groaned, missing the soft rush of wind that was caused by the opening of the door. “I can’t take this shit anymore!”

You cleared you throat, making his eyes shoot open, “Sir?”

He looked at you wide eyed.

“Are you alright, Mr. Kim?” you asked.

He nodded quickly, “Yes! I was just thinking about something!” His words came out more rushed than he intended them to.

You bit your lip in contemplation. You looked at the state that he was in, feeling awful for him.

I’m would do this for anyone. I’m just being a good human being, you convinced yourself.

“Mr. Kim? Do you want me to look over some of these files?” you offered.

He stammered, his face a little pink, “T-there’s no need, y/n. It’s past work hours anyway.”

You eyed him knowing that he was stubborn. But you were stubborn too. You weren’t going to let him blatantly reject your humanitarian efforts….not when he was clearly on the verge of a meltdown.

You looked at him, feeling braver than you should have, “I told you already, sir, my work hours start and end when your’s do. Besides, I mean no offense whatsoever, but you look like you could clearly use some help.”

He didn’t say anything.

You continued, “If this is because you think I’m not qualified enough to look over some details, or that I’m just an assistant who isn’t capable of-“

He cut you off, handing you a file, “Sit down, y/n.”

You smiled in triumph seating yourself on one of the chairs in front of his desk. “Just tell me what to do and I’ll do a good job, I promise.” You smiled at him.

He stood up, circling around his desk. He startled you by sitting on the chair next to yours, his thigh almost touching your own. He points at the page and explains, “These are the shipments from last month. But, the numbers don’t add up. There’s a surplus somewhere and we need to find it.”

You nodded, trying not to let the proximity get to you. “I’ll get to it.” You mumbled.

After about an hour of reviewing and making noted on what you’d found, you desperately needed to take a break.

You could see that the lights outside were dimmer which meant that the other employees had already left the building. You could also see from the corner of your eye that Namjoon was still engrossed in his file. The watch on your wrist showed that it was 7pm and the grumbling in your stomach showed that you were soon going to die of hunger.

Namjoon looked up at the sound that your stomach made, raising his eyebrows, “Hungry?”

“I’m okay.” You said, but the loud sounds from your stomach gave you away.

He smiled, his dimples rendering you speechless for a moment. “You know, y/n, I’m not a total ruthless asshole. Although I do act like it a lot of the times. We can get some dinner now. My treat as a token of appreciation for all the good work that you’re doing.”

To say that you were taken aback was an understatement. He seemed like a real person now, like he did on that night that you were trying hard to forget but failing. “Sir, I-“

“What do you feel like eating? I think the Italian place two blocks away has good food.” He said, getting up.

You hold onto his wrist instinctively, stopping him from getting up. “How about we order some pizza?” you suggest.

He froze when your skin made contact with his, but managed to say, “Pizza?”

“You don’t like pizza, Mr Kim?” you asked, then with a smile, you teased, “Rich people don’t like pizza, is that it?”

He scoffed playfully, “That’s right, Ms y/n,” he said, “But, I would be a total dumbass if I were to be one of those people.”

You let out a small laugh. “Double cheese, with extra pepperoni?” you asked, pulling out your phone from your pocket. He nodded, smiling at you softly.

The pizza arrived in less than fifteen minutes and nothing had made you happier in all the time that you had worked here. You were not the kind of person who could suppress your hunger and it showed in the way you opened the box and grabbed a slice of pizza, mumbling how good it tasted.

Namjoon looked at you with amusement. He had never seen you this happy before. He had to bite into a slice of pizza in order to stifle his laughter.

The pair of you ate in silence, until he decided to break it, “It’s 7.30.” he stated.

You looked at him, confusion written on your face, “I guess so.”

He continued, “That technically means this isn’t working hours.”

You frowned, “Well, we are working and we are still in the office building, so I think that’s not very accurate.” You added as an afterthought, realizing your mistake, “Sir.”

He paused, then said, “You don’t have to call me sir when we aren’t working.”

“But we are working, sir.”

He sighed in resignation.

You asked, with curiosity, “What was your point, Mr Kim?”

He looked at you, placing his slice of pizza down on the box. “I…I just wanted to say thank you. And not as your boss, just as me. Kim Namjoon.”

You humored him, “What would Kim Namjoon be thanking me for?”

“For standing up for him in front of his employees.” He paused and added before you could say anything, “And for not bringing up how we met and making it awkward.”

You almost spit out the food in your mouth, not having expected him to talk about it. He had overheard everything that you’d said to Mina. Just perfect.

He handed you water as your coughed, the food going down the wrong pipe.

You drank the water, then ate in silence again, unable to think of what to say. You heart was beating rapidly due to the awkwardness in the air.

Namjoon said, “Can I ask you something, y/n?”

“Sure.” You said. He smiled at the fact that you hadn’t called him sir.

“Am I really as intolerable as everyone in the office makes it seem?” You looked at his almond shaped eyes, they were sincere and he looked at you expectantly almost like a child waiting for an answer.

“I think you can be difficult. But, never out of line.” You said, and seeing his expression turn sour, you added, “So, no, you aren’t completely intolerable. Just a little difficult sometimes.”

He nodded. His mouth formed a straight line. “You can be honest with me. Lately, it seems like nobody else is.” He said.

“I don’t lie.” You said. You really didn’t want to say anything that might have crossed a line. It seemed like he was asking you a question like a friend would, and for some unknown reason, you felt like you’d gotten a little closer to him in the span of a few hours. Having seen him be more than just the CEO for a few minutes got you thinking that maybe all he wanted right now was someone he could talk to, someone who could understand.

You hesitated to be that person, though and you kept quiet.

“Shall we get back to work, sir?” you asked, putting the boxes aside.

At your attempt to change the subject, he didn’t say anything, although he frowned a bit harder. He nodded briefly and looked into a file placed in front of him. You decided to do the same, but you couldn’t concentrate.

You could see Namjoon pouting like a little child. You heard him sigh a few times and you rolled your eyes. You were wondering why you were ever intimidated by this man who was acting more and more like a 10 year old.

You sighed, knowing fully well that if you didn’t say what was on your mind, you wouldn’t get any work done.

“You are kind of an asshole, but I sort of understand why you need to be one.” You said.

He looked at you, turning his neck with such vigor that you were worried he would get whiplash. He looked at your face, his eyes scanning them. Then he broke out into a smile. “So, you don’t hate me?”

You weren’t expecting that question at all. “N-no.” you said, and your eyes unknowing travelled to look at his lips.

He seemed to notice that too, and the two of you just stared at each other in silence. The sexual tension was killing you, you stomach a mess from all the butterflies. You cleared your throat and looked down, blushing.

Trying to get back into work, you said, “I think the surplus is because of the accident that happened in one of their factories.”

“Hmm.” He hummed in response. Then said, “I think you’re right. We should see how they spent the insurance money to figure this out.”

You nodded, looking for the file. When you did find it, you sat down, exhausted from not having slept for what seemed like days now. You eyelids were heavy and you had to bite your inner cheek to keep yourself from falling asleep as you looked at the boring numbers.

You didn’t realize when you fell asleep, your head tilted painfully on the chair. You also didn’t realize when your body decided to get more comfortable and lean your head down to fall onto strong, broad shoulders.

Namjoon couldn’t help the fond smile that creeped onto his face and the fact that he liked how the weight of your head felt nuzzled on his shoulder.

The day of the meeting arrived faster that you had expected. You had personally made sure that the board room was ready to host the presentation. It seemed like the entire office was buzzing with the anticipation for the merger, the employees hoping that all their slogging would be fruitful.

You had found out that the owner of Kim Electricals would be arriving for the meeting too. A little birdie aka Lisa had told you that the owner was as hot as hot could get. You had rolled your eyes at her immaturity, but when you saw him seated in Namjoon’s cabin, legs crossed and a dazzling smile on his face, you couldn’t help but agree with her. He was attractive, and he knew it too, which probably aided to his good looks.

Namjoon stood up, greeting the man and he threw a sideway glance at you, introducing you.

“y/n, this is Kim Seokjin, and Jin Hyung, this is y/n, my assistant.”

The honorifics meant that Seokjin was older and that they probably knew each other outside work.

“Nice to meet you.” You said, with a soft smile.

Seokjin grabbed your hand shaking it, startling you, “Namjoon, you didn’t tell me that your assistant was so beautiful.”

You felt a blush creeping onto your face out of pure embarrassment at how brazen he was being. You looked at Namjoon unwittingly, gaging his expression. You didn’t know what you expected, but he didn’t look jealous or annoyed. You had to shake yourself mentally, shocked at your own train of thought. Why did you expect him to care about someone flirting with you?

“Can we please get to work?” Namjoon said, rolling his eyes at Seokjin. “y/n, please escort him to the board room.”

You nodded and pointed to the door politely, following him out.

The smile was plastered on his face throughout the elevator ride while you had to close your eyes like you always did.

When you opened the door to the board room, it was empty. You asked him to take a seat and to ask for anything that he might need while he waited.

“Ms y/n, can I ask you something?” he asked, and you nodded.

“Yes, sir?”

“Please. Call me Jin.” He said. When you didn’t reply, he joked, “Or oppa. That will do too.”

He winked and you laughed at how ridiculous he was being. “What’s your question, sir?” you enunciated the last word to make a point.

He pouted slightly, before asking, “Do you think Namjoon is a good man?”

You hesitated to answer, frankly taken aback by the serious tone of his voice. He added, “I’ve known him since high school. It gets difficult to make real friends when you come from families such as ours.”

You nodded, knowing what he meant. Rich heirs like them probably didn’t settle too well away from their protected, socialite lives.

He continued, “But, we’ve relied on each other a lot as we became older. Well, us and Jihyo.”

You remembered the conversation that Namjoon had had with Jihyo a few days back and it all made sense to you now.

“That’s nice.” You said, glad that Namjoon seemed to have genuine friends, even though you knew it wasn’t something you should care enough to be happy about.

“I just want to make sure that he’s surrounded by good people at a stressful time like this.” He concluded.

“Don’t worry about it. He’s doing a great job so far and I try to make sure that he doesn’t get carried away.” You replied. He seemed satisfied with that answer and you left him to go back to meet Namjoon.

Your boss was a mess. Usually he was confident and well spoken, but you could see that how nervous he was by the way he frowned, looking around as his eyes were unable to focus on one particular thing. He was fidgeting, restless from the anxiety. You hated seeing him like this. You hated it when he did things that made him seem more human. You felt an indistinguishable feeling in your body and the need to comfort him somehow grew tenfold. That was new to you because you’d had bosses before, and none of them made you feel like this.

He checked the time and got up. He made his way to the door and said, “I should probably go wait downstairs.”

You looked at him, wondering what to do to help. “Mr Kim,” you called out and he stopped in his tracks right in front of the door.

“You’ve got this.” You said, with a smile.

He nodded, still looking unsure, “Yeah.”

“Seriously.” You start, “I’ve seen the whole process of this presentation from scratch and I can bet my life on the fact that you’ll do great.”

He looked at you with a slight smile, “Thanks, y/n. I wish I could be as confident right now.” He ran his fingers through his hair.

You moved forward instinctively, taking his hand and giving it a squeeze. “Come on, where is the Kim Namjoon we all know and hate?” you joked.

You didn’t let go of his hand as he said sarcastically, putting on a front of offence, “Funny.”

You let go of his hand were about to take a step back when he grabbed your wrist instead, pulling you closer. You could smell his cologne on him, “W-What are you doing?” you stammered. He didn’t reply, but turned you around so that your back was to the door and pushed you back slightly. You felt the cold surface of the door tickle the skin of your back.

“Testing something.” He replied, his gaze on your lips.

“Testing? What?” you breathed out.

“If you remember how we actually met.” He replied. “And if you want that again.”

You stared at his face, dumbfounded. Of course you wanted it. The throbbing in your core was evidence of the fact that you were completely enamored by the man. You didn’t respond to him, mainly because you didn’t how to articulate everything you were thinking of into words. He was your boss. He was irresistible. He was an asshole. He was a clumsy, secretly sweet brat. All the contradictions had rendered you speechless.

When he didn’t get a reply from you, his gaze softened, as though he was suddenly aware of what he’d said, He let go of you, fidgeting with his fingers in embarrassment. “I…..” he struggled to say, “I was out of line. Sorry.”

You were unable to stop looking at his moving lips, your heart beating out of your chest due to the desire to just kiss him and worry about your job later.

He continued to ramble, “That probably bordered on sexual harassment. Oh my fucking god, I’m so sorry!” He was back to being the real him now, the clumsy idiot who got flustered so easily. “I just..” he sighed, “I just couldn’t stop thinking about that night and you’ve been so kind to me, it just made—“

Without hesitating for another moment, you cut his words off with a chaste kiss on his lips. You looked at his eyes, searching for a reaction and his hands snaked around your waist, pulling you closer as though he had been waiting for you to do that. His mouth crashed onto yours, your back hitting the door behind you as you tangled your arms in his lush locks.

You breathed in when his tone swiped your lower lip and he took the opportunity to push his tongue inside, your own meeting his with a desperation that you didn’t know you possessed. You moaned into the passionate kiss and his hands tightened around you at the sound. He began rubbing them at your sides and you slightly tugged at his hair. You had to pull away for a brief second to regain your breathe before kissing him again.

You were startled when there was a knock at the door, making you both come out of the daze, panting and staring at each other.

“Namjoon?” Jihyo’s voice sounded from outside.

You moved away from the door, nudging him to open the door and answer as you tried to fix yourself up.

He said, “Come in.”

Jihyo entered with a smile, and her bright round eyes moved between the two of you, “I hope I didn’t interrupt anything.” She stated, making your eyes go wide.

“We were just about to leave for the meeting.” He said. You wondered how he suddenly seemed so calm and composed again.

“I came to wish you luck.” She said and patted him on the shoulder, “Good luck!” she said. He thanked her and after throwing a smile in your direction, she left.

You followed Namjoon out in silence. When you were in the elevator, he turned to talk to you and said something but you couldn’t comprehend due to your own anxiety inside the closed box. Seeing your expression, he moved closer, taking your hand in his. As soon as you felt his warmth beside you, you felt a little safer, albeit the panic wouldn’t completely go away. You nodded, assuming that he was asking you if everything was okay.

When the elevator opened, you moved away quickly, scared that someone would see how close you two had been.

“Are you okay?” he asked when you jumped out of the elevator.

“Yes.” You replied, “I just can’t be in elevators.” You explained.

He looked concerned, his eyes soft with worry. “Don’t worry, sir.” You said, “I can handle it.”

“Sir?” he repeated.

You gulped, aware that it probably didn’t settle well with him to have just made out with him and immediately acted like nothing had changed.

You tried to change the subject, “We should get to the meeting now if you don’t want to be late.” You waited for him to walk, but he watched your expression carefully instead. His mouth formed a straight line as he began to make his way towards the board room.

You sat on the sidelines, watching as he gave the presentation to the skeptical board. He didn’t fumble with his words even once. He looked determined, he looked like the front that he liked to put up. The cold, calculating CEO. He made eye contact with you once or twice, lingering for a few seconds too long. But, he didn’t look at you like he did usually. There was something else in his gaze, something that reminded you of your first day at this job.

He looked at you with eyes filled with anger.

When the presentation and the bombardment of questions that followed afterwards was over, the board members left one by one, some of them praising him and some still skeptical. He walked out with Seokjin engaged in a serious conversation that looked too private for you to intrude upon.

You decided to greet your former employer instead—the President of the company and Namjoon’s father.

“Good afternoon, Mr Kim. I hope you’ve been well.” You greeted him with a deep bow.

He smiled and replied, “I have, y/n.” He added after a pause, “How’s my son treating you?”

Your cheeks flushed at his question but you managed to answer, “Great, sir.”

He nodded with a smile and excused himself.

You sat in the conference room, happy to be alone with your thoughts.

What were you going to do about the mess that you had made? The scariest thing was probably the fact that in spite of understanding what the consequences could be if things went sour, you didn’t regret kissing him. You wanted to do it again, and you wanted to do more than just that.

You weren’t left alone for long as Namjoon entered, his eyes meeting yours coldly. He closed the door behind him and you heard the lock click.

“You were perfect today!” you exclaimed, standing up.

He rushed towards you, not waiting for you to say anything as he kissed you again. His hands were around you in not time and his mouth moved hurriedly against yours. You froze for a second before reciprocating. Your hands were on his biceps, letting go of all inhibitions and meeting his tongue with your own.

He pulled away from you and said, “Don’t ever do that again. Don’t pretend like this didn’t happen.”

You nodded before pulling him in for another rushed kiss. You could feel his hardness pressing into your crotch, and you rubbed your hips against him, making him moan at the friction. His hands caressed your clothed breasts, and you could feel how wet you were under your skirt.

His hands began to travel down, and you whimpered when his cold hands made contact with your thigh. His fingers moved under your skirt, rubbing your clothed core. He could probably feel how wet you were and he wasted no time in moving the material of your underwear aside and rubbing your clit, then spreading your arousal over you in a gentle motion.

He looked at you briefly before asking, “Do you want this?”

You nodded profusely, “More than anything else.”

He inserted a finger inside your slit, making you gasp. He added another finger and moved them slowly. Your hips began to move upwards to meet his fingers with a new kind of desperation for more. He increased his speed, kissing down your jaw simultaneously. You could feel the familiar heat in your abdomen and you were embarrassed at how quickly he was able to bring you to your breaking point.

He seemed to notice it too, curling his fingers to meet your g-spot with every push of his finger, he whispered to you, “You’re so beautiful.”

His words only furthered the arrival of your high and you felt your legs trembling as you held onto his shoulders for support. The waves of pleasure hit you, leaving you moaning and closing your eyes as your head tilted backwards. You felt your arousal dripping down your thigh as you rode out your high with his fingers still inside of you.

When you came down from your orgasm, he pulled his digits out, making you gasp at the feeling. You were a panting, exhausted mess still glowing from the post-orgasmic high and he kissed your lips gently. You stared at him when he pulled away, wondering how you were unable to control yourself around him.

He said, “We should have done this sooner.”

A fear gripped you when he uttered those words. You were overthinking everything, starting from where this out your position as his assistant at to wondering if he genuinely liked you or was referring to fucking a dispensable employee.

You moved away from him, the what-ifs taking over, “We shouldn’t have done this.” You stated, fixing your skirt.

There was flash of hurt in his features. “Why not?” he asked, cleaning your arousal off his fingers with a tissue.

“I’m not the kind of person who just sleeps around. I know that’s probably what you think because of that one night stand, but you should know that I take this job seriously and I don’t want to just another assistant that some rich ceo can sleep with and then fire when he’s done with her.” You paused your rant when he moved closer to you, close enough that you could feel the warmth of his body again.

“Do I really seem like that kind of person to you?” He sounded stern again, you could feel the anger radiating off of him.

“I just—“ you started.

He cut you off by saying, “If that’s what you think, then okay. Let’s just fucking forget everything. You can go back to being the perfect assistant and I’ll be your rich, snobby, fuckboy of a boss.” He began storming out and didn’t stop when you tried to stop him.

“No, Mr. Kim, that’s not what I meant!” you said, your voice louder than before.

He ignored your distress and said in a bland tone. “There’s a fundraiser at Seokjin’s house tonight. He invited me to it a few minutes back.”

You tried again to talk to him, “But, sir-“

He didn’t care about what you were going to say, “He asked me to bring you along with me. But, since it’s such short notice, you can decline if you want to.”

You sighed, knowing that the stubborn man wouldn’t let you have your way.

“I can come, sir. No problem,” you said, hoping to talk to him during the event.

He gave the briefest of nods, walking away.

You followed him out, but he was making a deliberate effort to walk away from you and as his pace increased, you were unable to follow his long legs with your high heels. You shook your head, deciding to make him have a proper conversation with you later that night.

You met Jihyo near the elevator and he stopped you, asking you how the presentation was.

You made every effort to smile at her and said, “It went well.”

“What happened to you?” she looked at Namjoon’s receding figure pointedly. “Did you fight with him?”

“No, of course not.”

“Well, he looks mad” she said.

You tried to shrug it off with a joke, “Doesn’t he always?”

“Never around you.” She replied, making you stare at her with wide eyes.

She laughed briefly and moved closer to whisper into your ear, “Might have something to do with the fact that he likes you.”

You felt like a deer caught in headlights and stuttered, ‘W-what you talking about?”

“Or maybe because you slept together?” she asked, making you inhale sharply.

“W-we didn’t…” you trailed off, realizing that she probably knew everything, and there was no use lying to her.

She sensed your panic and said, “It’s okay, y/n.”

You ran your fingers through your hair, frustrated.

“Just be careful.” She said and you looked at her with confusion etched on your face. She explained, “Let’s just say that you really shouldn’t want to deal with his family.”

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happymetalgirl · 6 years ago

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Mark Morton - Anesthetic

Over the years I have learned to become wary of "star-studded", guest-feature-focused albums coming out of metal. It's not because guest features don't work as well in metal as they do in, say hip hop (Devin Townsend's Deconstruction is living proof of it being possible), but because these kinds of albums rarely seem to have any kind of cohesive vision and because the guests involved hardly ever bring their A-game to projects like these, if ever outside their main project(s).

Spearheaded by Lamb of God guitarist Mark Morton, Anesthetic is the latest of these big-time conglomerations of various artists within hard rock and heavy metal, and Jesus Christ it is fucking terrible.

I was actually kind of intrigued when I heard Mark Morton of all people had a solo album coming out. The dude's not really the most public figure in his band, and he's not really called upon too much outside Lamb of God as far as I know. But when I looked at the track list and saw the nutrition facts-length list of guest stars, I got a little bit nervous, and then when I saw it was being released under Spinefarm (one of the most trash-ass labels of late) I knew it wasn't going to be good. And God, sometimes it sucks being right.

For starters, this album has absolutely no identity, as these kinds of projects tend to, which the constant switching from guest singer to guest singer doesn't help, but for as much as Mark Morton often resorts to his usual Lamb of God blueprints to fill the voids of a lot of songs, nothing about this album gave me the sense that I was getting a glimpse into Morton's creative center. Because if he's not just adding what he knows how to do from Lamb of God, he's just providing super generic alternative rock/metal guitar work and he's not present at all really for huge portions of what is apparently his own album. As a lot of Spinefarm releases tend to be, this album is cookie-cutter as fuck, from the lazy, widely palatable alt rock/metal styling to the utterly unimaginative and predictable butt rock structures. And all of those stylistic choices would be fine if the songwriting was actually potent, but there is nothing to remember this album by other than the repeated feelings of confusion at what contrived style Morton and his main collaborators like Josh Wilbur are trying from track to track.

The album starts off with the single that perhaps gained it the most preemptive traction due to its featuring of a posthumous performance from Linkin Park's Chester Bennington. It's like the equivalent of listening to oil and water, with Chester sounding like he was recording vocals for an older Linkin Park track, and Morton playing like he's warming up for a Lamb of God show, in a radio alt metal format. The following song with Papa Roach's Jacoby Shaddix is essentially the same ultra played-out, formulaic butt rock bullshit with a little hint of Morton's playing style with Lamb of God coming through.

Aside from those two songs, "Save Defiance" with Altar Bridge's Myles Kennedy and "Back from the Dead" with Buckcherry frontman Josh Todd simply pad the album with another eight and a half minutes of by-the-numbers radio metal time-wasting. But it's the album's second to last track, on which Mark Morton himself apparently takes the mic, where the producer's overlooming touch is really highlighted. Morton's voice is layered and doctored as hell, just for the sake of letting him sing on his own album, probably for the gimmick of it, but of course not without the label making sure it was marketable in the same way the rest of the songs on here try to be. The album also gets into some weird genre dabbling/appropriation that shows how clearly poorly versed Morton and producer Josh Wilbur are in them. The songs "Axis" and "Blur" go for this cliché southern metal vibe that Mark Lanegan and Mark Morales clearly aren't feeling enough to put their best on for and aren't excited about performing for.

The two heavier songs on here are rather revealing of where Morton's compositional strengths really lie. The song "The Never" with Chuck Billy is practically just a modern Testament song with none of the flashiness of the band's instrumental virtuosity. As basic as it is, it feels far more natural than pretty much everything surrounding it, and the rest of the ham-fisted album doesn't feel natural at all until a few moments on the closing song with Alissa White-Gluz from Arch Enemy and Morton's longtime bandmate, Randy Blythe.

When Mark and Randy team up on the closing track's verses, a little bit of the vibrance they channel through Lamb of God comes through that highlights how out of his element Mark is on most of the rest of the album. Alissa White-Gluz is indeed a competent enough death metal vocalist, but performing on the track with Randy Blythe (granted one of the best and most signature in his field), she arguably doesn't hold her own well at all and it kind of shows how exaggerated her talent is in a lot of circles. Her clean vocals are also kind of a distraction when they show up and they break up the rhythm the song tries to develop.

Despite ending on its strongest foot, this album left nothing but a disgusting aftertaste in my mouth. I could at least laugh at how ridiculous Papa Roach's new album was earlier this year, but this, there's nothing funny about this. This is just a less than half-assed look-who's-here fest from everyone involved, and if Mark Morton himself did pour the effort he claims he did into this album, it clearly got snuffed out by the label's guide to wide audience pandering. Or who knows, maybe this really is a good representation of Morton's creative mind; if it is, I'm glad it's consistently overridden by the rest of his bandmates in his main project, which I might not even be able to look at quite the same because of how truly, abysmally unbearable this album is. I'm being hyperbolic with that of course, but I could not exaggerate how much I absolutely hated nearly every minute of sitting through this album. I would rather sit through Otep's last album, I would rather sit through the fucking Prophets of Rage album, I would even rather sit through the last Ministry album. Fuck it, I'd rather sit through all of them together, and then a Puddle of Mudd album. At least that'd be an entertaining shitshow. This shitshow, on the other hand, didn't even need to happen, and no one participating really seemed to care much about how it happened or if it did at all. If this thing fell through at some point after everyone submitted their parts, I don't think anyone would have been heartbroken by it. This is on par with, if not even worse than, Bullet for My Valentine's sellout cowardice last year (though Spinefarm as well incidentally) and perhaps even Black Veil Brides' atrocity from last year too. And this wasn't even me getting morbidly curious either, this had the ingredients to not be such rancid public bathroom trash. This utter shambles and mismanagement of this kind of uninvested, big bill collaboration didn't need to happen to what has been anticipated to be such a hype year for metal, and this is undoubtedly the worst thing I have heard all year.

The Camel (minus the fun)/10

#mark morton #lamb of god #metal #heavy metal #groove metal #alternative metal #new music #new album #album review

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idolapps · 8 years ago

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into the new world - girls' generation

OOC INFO

NAME/ALIAS, PRONOUNS, TIMEZONE: EJ, female, est

RESERVATION: pristin

MEMBER PROFILE

FACECLAIM: kim mingyu (seventeen)

NAME/STAGENAME: lee taehyun

BIRTHDATE/AGE: april 6, 1994 / age 22

COMPANY/POSITION: leader, main rapper, lead dancer of 360°Z

HEIGHT/WEIGHT: 185 cm/68 kg

TRAINING PERIOD/JOINING YEAR: training period: 3 years

INTERESTING FACTS: His fans adore him for his “tsundere” character. Having attended an elite boarding school in the States where he studied Mandarin for 6 years, Taehyun is highly skilled in English and Chinese. He’s also a skilled basketball player. He knows how to play piano and guitar, and although these skills are rarely used in performance, he finds them useful in composing.

STRENGTHS/WEAKNESSES:

(+) RAP&DANCE – taehyun’s capacity as a rapper and dancer certainly satisfies and mostly exceeds industry standards and beyond. having first developed both skills as self-taught endeavors, his flow, style, rhythm, and choreography are individually unique and distinctly natural. although his deep register and long, lean frame were birth-given virtues, the intensive training he underwent through his time at galaxy has refined and polished his skills in these areas.

(+) COMPOSITION – besides writing his own lyrics, taehyun has produced many of his own beats, mixtapes, and songs throughout his musical career. from being a teenager pursuing a hobby, an underground artist vying for recognition, and a galaxy trainee striving to stand out, he now regularly contributes to his group’s releases to whatever extent he may. in fact, composition and producing are areas in which he seeks to improve his skills the most, especially as his career progresses.

(+) PROFESSIONALISM – despite having debuted not too long ago, taehyun is exceptionally professional, a great advantage for someone in the entertainment industry. he’s very good at maintaining a positive public image, as he regularly monitors and keenly perceives what fans, the media, and the public want from him. furthermore, he has a knack for picking up social cues and reading people, seemingly always knowing the right thing to do and say at any given time – useful for interviews, variety shows, and extricating himself from tricky situations. though he denies it, he is a bit of a perfectionist and will do a quality job with whatever is assigned to him.

(–) VOCALS – singing has never been his standout talent, and he acknowledges it. sure, he can do the rapper-singing thing (e.g. drake), but that’s about it. he’ll gladly leave the singing to the vocals.

(–) COLD REALIST – simply put, lee taehyun is a perfect example of a boy who grew up too fast. perhaps you can blame his past, but he’s a cynic and harsh realist. some have labelled his insensitivity to others’ emotions as a symptom of some sort of psychopath, but trust me, he knows and understands very well how you’re feeling. he just doesn’t see why he should cater his behavior to your emotions and whims. there won’t be any “dreams come true!” or “I want to inspire people through my music!” cheese coming out of this mouth. he didn’t cry a single tear after his debut showcase, and although it’s been less than a year, he’s already over the rookie’s honeymoon phase of his career. he’s not heartless or mean – just a hard, cold realist. the world’s not all fluff and kittens, so should he pretend that it is?

(–) EGO-DRIVEN – though he doesn’t quite own up to it yet, lee taehyun is a creature of his ego. by nature, he’s not a bragger or show-off (probably because he’s self-confident anyways), but he does secretly enjoy when his ego is fed. he keeps it to himself, but he does have a habit of judging people against his own standards. at worst, he can be rather stubborn, overly competitive, and reckless in pursuit of something if it catches his attention. in his defense, he’s been rather successful with anything he’s wanted thus far, at least to what meets the eye. and for the demons he does truly struggle against, he shoves them under his ego to be dealt with later. after all, right now he’s young, talented, attractive, leader of one of the most popular groups in the industry, with thousands of fangirls screaming his name. he’s unbound and unobligated, and the future only promises further treasures – or at least so it seems.

BIO/PERSONALITY:

Born in April 6th of 1994, Lee Taehyun grew up in a family that owned one of Korea’s most prominent conglomerate corporations. As expected, his early childhood was without a visible care in the world, golden spoon in hand, reporters and cameras shoved in his face. Designer clothes, top chefs, expensive private tutors, and trips around the globe – yet it wasn’t until age 12 that he learned who he truly was, what he truly was. Summoned to his father’s office one evening, he left as Lee Taehyun, of course the son of CEO Lee Hyunbae, but not of his wife. A bastard son, born to a woman he’d never met or seen, raised with siblings from another womb. It all made sense now, how different his “mother’s” gaze towards him was so starkly contrasting, depending on whether his father was in the room. After all, there he was – a living, breathing, talking reminder of her husband’s infidelity. But perhaps most importantly, there he was – a gigantic threat to the value of the family company stock.

Within the next month, he was shipped off to an elite boarding school in the States for the purposes of receiving an “elite education,” but it was clear to him that he was being shoved away for hiding across the ocean, away from nosy newspaper reporters and competitors who wished to see his father’s company stock falter. The moment he learned what his identity truly was, he was removed from his entire life as he knew it. However, he was compliant throughout middle and high school. Lee Taehyun became that one guy whom everyone envied but couldn’t bring themselves to hate – low effort, high grades, star athlete, had his fair share of adolescent “fun”, but never got caught. He was a real typical golden boy, but behind the scenes, he struggled with his own demons and fumbled with the mysteries he never had the chance to answer. He found solace in music (particularly hip-hop and rap) and dance, and increasingly so, he found himself in the school’s recording and studios, up late at night writing lyrics by the moonlight. Upon graduating from high school, he was shocked to be immediately pulled back to Korea to enroll in college, since his older half-brother was proving himself rather incapable of becoming heir. Again, his father whispered him false promises, that a Korean college degree would mean better “business connections.” But this time, Lee Taehyun wanted none of it. If his father, his family, or anyone at all thought they could push him away and call him as they wanted, they were in for an unpleasant surprise.

Reluctantly so, he enrolled in college, but his true energy was spent in Seoul’s underground hip-hop scene, as he started making ripples in the rap game and joined a dance crew. About a year in, he was casted by Galaxy Entertainment, though he had never had the slightest interest in an entertainment career, yet alone an idol career. He stuffed the scout’s business card away in his pile of books, but as the pressure for him to keep up his grades and intern in the office grew stronger, the more and more appealing the offer became. After all, the trainee contract provided him a place to stay, allowance for food, and the opportunity to deliver a vicious slap in the face of his father. He called in for an audition as a sign of rebellion and signed the contract as a declaration of secession. The day he moved into the trainee dorms was the last day he’d spoken to a family member to this very day.

Trainee life for him was strange to say the least. He’d grown up mostly emotionally alone and was accustomed to making unilateral decisions, not around dozens of other trainees whose desperation and stress he found draining. He hadn’t lived in Korea for the past 9 years, and he didn’t dare to tell anyone about his familial background. Furthermore, he was a rather intimidating character at first impression – towering height, tanned complexion, deep voice, sharp features. He was far from the super friendly, talkative, or welcoming type. He hated sucking up, hated the whole hierarchy of “seniors” and “juniors” – in his world, skill and ability were the only measures of status. Yet by some lucky strike, he managed to find some friends and colleagues amidst the crowds of peers he found mostly mundane and plain. Most importantly, it turned out that he was rather good at what an idol needed to do – rapping, dancing, composing. And most of all, surviving. After three years, the debut came, and although he couldn’t quite consider it a dream come true, it was a promising start.

---

Taehyun is generally cool, but not necessarily cold. His mannerisms are suave and charming, smooth talker and sharp tongue. He’s not your typical ray of sunshine, but knows when to smile and how to do it convincingly – but don’t expect much cuteness from him whatsoever. Off-camera, he’s reportedly not the most easily approachable. It’s not like he’s hostile or socially awkward by any means, but people often say he seems mature or serious for his age, and his towering height and dark eyes don’t help his cause. However, initiate interaction and he’s talented at holding a conversation, a little blunt, a little teasing, likes to keep people guessing of his true intentions. His closest friends get to see the more free-spirited, romantic side of him, but this is very rare. He’s slow to trust others, but gain his trust, and he’ll pay back with a strong sense of loyalty and justice. He’s not too outwardly friendly or warm, but still seems to know a lot of faces within the industry. He prefers to keep his public and private life separate, and it is generally hard to read beyond his placid façade.

Within his group, his general mantra as a leader is “you do you,” but the moment any of his members do anything to jeopardize the group’s success or test his patience, he’ll serve justice where it is due. He’s definitely not the warm and caring type of leader upfront, and when he takes care of others, it’s generally more subtle and behind the scenes. Admittedly, he can get a little hot-headed and cutthroat in rehearsal or training – he believes in “work hard, play hard.” Occasionally, he can be coldhearted and demoralizing, but only he’s allowed to do that to his members. He won’t tolerate anyone else disrespecting his group.

Regarding trainees, he’s probably indifferent. Chances are, he has no idea who you are – he doesn’t really strive to be a role model or a popular, caring senior. He generally won’t treat you any differently for being a trainee, and for god sake, he doesn’t want you to suck up to him, though he won’t tolerate disrespect. He has no specific expectations, but if you’re sincere, hard-working, and talented, then he’ll probably treat you well enough.

#male #idol #galaxy #submission

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shopdealman-blog · 7 years ago

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Forget the runway-copying conglomerates. The new breed of fast-fashion designer can turn a social-media trend into affordable clothing in the blink of an eye. Which is exactly as cool—and as ethically complicated–as it sounds. After the #menswear boom of the mid-to-late aughts, guys began looking in the mirror at their chambray shirts, raw selvedge denim and moc toe boots and wondering what was next for their sartorial lives. It wasn't long before they were trading in Yuketen for Yeezy, Ralph Lauren for Raf Simons, and A.P.C. for SLP. But swapping heritage gear for high-fashion looks put pressure on their wallets. Fast-fashion retailers like Zara and H&M were there to give them the trends they craved at a fraction of the cost (and often testing the boundary between "inspired by" and outright ripped off in the process). As menswear became more like womenswear—more driven by “it” items from season to season—guys started looking for new ways to keep up with the revolving door of trends. The times are changing once again. Interest in fast-fashion is, for the first time, waning. In the first quarter of this year, H&M had their first monthly sales drop in nearly four years, and Zara parent company Inditex SA saw profitability shrink to an eight-year low. They attribute these strains to divergent spending habits and the rise of competition, but it's also coming from the ground up—via young, independent, hungry labels that have used social media to attract young, trend-hungry customers. These brands might not categorize themselves as fast-fashion, but despite their relatively modest sizes, they understand the importance of instant gratification to their style-savvy, cost-cognizant audience. And like their more corporate competition, brands like Represent, KNYEW, and MNML have gotten popular by flipping the hottest current trends into instantly-available items, while using social media and YouTube to reach new customers. But to the designers giving the inspiration, like Fear of God’s Jerry Lorenzo, some of these new-age fast-fashion brands are more like imitators than actual designers. Richard Sung, the co-founder of Las Vegas lifestyle brand KNYEW, knows what makes customers apprehensive about traditional fast-fashion retailers. “When I think of fast-fashion, I think of a massive tornado,” he says. “It sucks up everything in its path, feeding off other designers, destroying the environment we live in with absolutely no remorse for the devastation it leaves behind.” But labels like Sung’s are still taking a page out of the Zara playbook. Rather than revolutionize by inventing the next big trend, they've gotten ahead by hopping on current trends quicker than anyone else. Brothers George and Mike Heaton started Represent with a small collection of distressed and ripped denim. Since then, the line has evolved into outerwear, velour hoodies, mohair shirts and crepe sole boots—the kind of products that hit runways a few seasons ago but are just now trickling down to the masses. "Fast-fashion puts such a pressure on the high-end seasonal approach to retail," George says. Represent has to keep up with trends just like any fast-fashion brand, but being small allows them to be nimble and selective about which trends they choose to hop on. They don’t have to make clothes in line with every trend. They just need the ones they bet on to be hits. Represent’s competitive prices—bomber jackets for $370 and jeans for $150 that resemble the $1,000-plus versions made by Fear Of God—are a product of striking while the trend iron is hot. “We’re able to exceed minimum quantities [for fabric orders], which in turn brings prices down, which helps us create a wholesale margin as well as a healthy retail profit,” George Heaton says. In that way, Represent isn’t much different than a traditional fast-fashion retailer. Sell a shit ton of a shirt or pants, and you can buy up the fabric to make them for less. Where they differ is in the amount of products they offer. Selling fewer total styles, which keeps the need to buy multiple different fabrics to a minimum. Like their customers, Represent pays close attention to social media. So do other brands. “We’re always keeping an eye on what’s going on in other industries as well—music, visual art, design—to make sure we’re developing upon other relevant areas to incorporate into our line,” says George. “With blogs and influencers, that product elevation allows [products] to be pushed hard to the masses, which in turn makes it a trend.” Parisian brand Nid de Guepes, too, points to a vague idea of “youth culture” as their inspiration, but they also have a pragmatic-veering-toward-cynical approach to the industry. "In the ready-to-wear industry and fast-fashion, everything has been invented, you cannot create something really revolutionary," says Erwan Ferriere, the brand's communications manager. “We don’t have the same market power Vetements, Gosha [Rubchinskiy] or Off-White has. It’s risky for a brand like us to release something that will be trendy before any high fashion brand releases it. So we must re-interpret what’s trendy—which is in the fashion world most of the time un-wearable—and make it wearable.” Courtesy of Represent Courtesy of Represent Other brands keep costs down in slightly less savory ways. The owner and founder of LA-based MNML, who prefers to go by “M” for what will be obvious reasons, admits that his designs do more than just pay homage. He works with factories overseas to make MNML’s line of jeans, primarily in India and China. He sends those factories examples of pieces to reproduce from popular brands like Fear of God and Saint Laurent. (He’s even had vintage Levi’s remade.) During our conversation, he says he’s wearing a pair of Saint Laurent jeans that served as the inspiration for MNML’s F36—though, in this case, “inspiration” isn’t entirely accurate. But he says his gear can hold its own. “The key to our success has just been partnering with amazing factories. We have probably the best wash house in China,” M says. “I see brands that make denim in LA or overseas. I walk into Barneys and I’m looking at $300 jeans and I’m like, ‘Your wash sucks.’ Our wash factory nails it.” He takes pride in the quality of his products because he’s done his due diligence in what he’s sourcing and who he works with. He knows he wouldn’t be able to keep costs so low if everything was sourced and manufactured in LA. “The minimums are absolutely insane. It takes forever,” he explains. “It’s the apparel business, so if you want to be successful, especially if you have a fast-fashion brand, you’re definitely producing overseas.” M. admits that, as someone who cares about fashion, he sometimes feels guilty about replicating the work of popular, trendsetting brands, but doesn’t get too bent out of shape. “At the end of the day,” he says, “it’s a wash and some holes in jeans. And it’s about giving people the look that they want for less.” Jerry Lorenzo couldn’t disagree more with MNML’s claim to being a sort of streetwear Robin Hood. “I don’t want to hear that they’re doing some service to people who can’t afford our product. If you want to do a service, go give some clothes to the homeless. Selling a pair of $100 jeans to a kid isn’t providing a service to him,” he says. In response, MNML’s designer M. sees things differently. “If a student can spend $64 for a pair of quality jeans as opposed to hundreds or even thousands of dollars to look good, I think that is a service to a degree. Even though we do donate to charity on a regular basis, MNML is obviously a business and we feel we are offering something of value to our customer.” Courtesy of MNML Courtesy of MNML To Lorenzo, what these upstart fast-fashion labels do is extremely damaging to his brand, especially when they’re able to knock off his designs before he can get the authentic product to customers. But he’s most frustrated by the idea that someone will mistake their gear for his. “It took us a lot of time and work to nail those proportions and details, and they’re stealing our designs and passing them off as their own,” he says. “No one knows that their track pants aren’t Fear of God, and so when they see it they might think, ‘That’s a $900 track pant?’ because their quality sucks, and that’s damaging to what we’re doing.” According to Lorenzo, MNML goes a step further than say a Zara or a Topman. The big brands might adopt his design language like side zippers and oversized fits, but not the whole design itself. “I take seeing pieces inspired by mine at, like, Topman or Zara as a sign we have influence,” he says. “But when you see a track pant or hoodie with the same seams, proportion, colors, and zipper placements, it’s just stealing. That brand built its entire brand off of our proposition. It’s like erasing our name off the homework assignment, putting yours on it and saying you did the work,” he says of MNML. But MNML isn’t willing to sell the farm on the fact that they are stealing designs, per se. “Our aim is to offer affordable fashion, and we are following the model that Zara, Topman, and H&M laid,” says M. “The only difference between them and us is those companies make poor quality clothes, billions of dollars and they don’t pay attention to the details.” He says his clothing is inspired by multiple sources, no different than any other designer or brand, and the number of styles of denim he’s producing, along with the positive customer feedback he receives, is proof that he’s doing right by the customer. MNML Track Pants Fear of God's Fifth Collection Fear of God Track Pants Legally speaking, however, Lorenzo's options may be limited, as his designs don’t rely on heavy branding or ornamentation—marks, like Adidas’s three stripes or Nike’s swoosh, that are easier to copyright. Still, Lorenzo says his legal team is currently working on how to address MNML and companies like it. Previously, Fear of God took legal action against Represent for a bomber jacket Lorenzo felt was too close to his own—an issue that he says has since been resolved. (For what it's worth, Represent still sells a bomber jacket that is quite similar to the one Fear of God made back in 2014.) Micro-trends, Instagram marketing, aggressive litigation: the world of independent fast-fashion is in its Wild West period. And that’s all because these brands want to serve a much savvier consumer than the retail world has ever seen. They’re online, they know the trends, and they know how much they're willing to spend to get them. In their pursuit of young, cool customers, these labels are not unlike their more profitable elders. And some of these independent labels can even stake a legitimate claim to delivering designer looks to the masses for less, without all of the negative connotations that come with fast-fashion mall shopping. For now, though, the line between counterfeit and inspiration remains blurry. And while a label like Represent can use its indie status as cover for trend-hopping, they want to expand: Represent plans to open its own store in 2018. And as indie fast-fashion jumps into the big leagues, a these companies will have to confront a challenge: they’ll run the risk of becoming the very thing they set out to disrupt.

Forget the runway-copying conglomerates. The new breed of fast-fashion designer can turn a social-media trend into affordable clothing in the blink of an eye. Which is exactly as cool—and as ethically complicated–as it sounds. After the #menswear boom of the mid-to-late aughts, guys began looking in the mirror at their chambray shirts, raw selvedge denim and moc toe boots and wondering what was next for their sartorial lives. It wasn’t long before they were trading in Yuketen for Yeezy, Ralph Lauren for Raf Simons, and A.P.C. for SLP. But swapping heritage gear for high-fashion looks put pressure on their wallets. Fast-fashion retailers like Zara and H&M were there to give them the trends they craved at a fraction of the cost (and often testing the boundary between “inspired by” and outright ripped off in the process). As menswear became more like womenswear—more driven by “it” items from season to season—guys started looking for new ways to keep up with the revolving door of trends. The times are changing once again. Interest in fast-fashion is, for the first time, waning. In the first quarter of this year, H&M had their first monthly sales drop in nearly four years, and Zara parent company Inditex SA saw profitability shrink to an eight-year low. They attribute these strains to divergent spending habits and the rise of competition, but it’s also coming from the ground up—via young, independent, hungry labels that have used social media to attract young, trend-hungry customers. These brands might not categorize themselves as fast-fashion, but despite their relatively modest sizes, they understand the importance of instant gratification to their style-savvy, cost-cognizant audience. And like their more corporate competition, brands like Represent, KNYEW, and MNML have gotten popular by flipping the hottest current trends into instantly-available items, while using social media and YouTube to reach new customers. But to the designers giving the inspiration, like Fear of God’s Jerry Lorenzo, some of these new-age fast-fashion brands are more like imitators than actual designers. Richard Sung, the co-founder of Las Vegas lifestyle brand KNYEW, knows what makes customers apprehensive about traditional fast-fashion retailers. “When I think of fast-fashion, I think of a massive tornado,” he says. “It sucks up everything in its path, feeding off other designers, destroying the environment we live in with absolutely no remorse for the devastation it leaves behind.” But labels like Sung’s are still taking a page out of the Zara playbook. Rather than revolutionize by inventing the next big trend, they’ve gotten ahead by hopping on current trends quicker than anyone else. Brothers George and Mike Heaton started Represent with a small collection of distressed and ripped denim. Since then, the line has evolved into outerwear, velour hoodies, mohair shirts and crepe sole boots—the kind of products that hit runways a few seasons ago but are just now trickling down to the masses. “Fast-fashion puts such a pressure on the high-end seasonal approach to retail,” George says. Represent has to keep up with trends just like any fast-fashion brand, but being small allows them to be nimble and selective about which trends they choose to hop on. They don’t have to make clothes in line with every trend. They just need the ones they bet on to be hits. Represent’s competitive prices—bomber jackets for $370 and jeans for $150 that resemble the $1,000-plus versions made by Fear Of God—are a product of striking while the trend iron is hot. “We’re able to exceed minimum quantities [for fabric orders], which in turn brings prices down, which helps us create a wholesale margin as well as a healthy retail profit,” George Heaton says. In that way, Represent isn’t much different than a traditional fast-fashion retailer. Sell a shit ton of a shirt or pants, and you can buy up the fabric to make them for less. Where they differ is in the amount of products they offer. Selling fewer total styles, which keeps the need to buy multiple different fabrics to a minimum. Like their customers, Represent pays close attention to social media. So do other brands. “We’re always keeping an eye on what’s going on in other industries as well—music, visual art, design—to make sure we’re developing upon other relevant areas to incorporate into our line,” says George. “With blogs and influencers, that product elevation allows [products] to be pushed hard to the masses, which in turn makes it a trend.” Parisian brand Nid de Guepes, too, points to a vague idea of “youth culture” as their inspiration, but they also have a pragmatic-veering-toward-cynical approach to the industry. “In the ready-to-wear industry and fast-fashion, everything has been invented, you cannot create something really revolutionary,” says Erwan Ferriere, the brand’s communications manager. “We don’t have the same market power Vetements, Gosha [Rubchinskiy] or Off-White has. It’s risky for a brand like us to release something that will be trendy before any high fashion brand releases it. So we must re-interpret what’s trendy—which is in the fashion world most of the time un-wearable—and make it wearable.” Courtesy of Represent Courtesy of Represent Other brands keep costs down in slightly less savory ways. The owner and founder of LA-based MNML, who prefers to go by “M” for what will be obvious reasons, admits that his designs do more than just pay homage. He works with factories overseas to make MNML’s line of jeans, primarily in India and China. He sends those factories examples of pieces to reproduce from popular brands like Fear of God and Saint Laurent. (He’s even had vintage Levi’s remade.) During our conversation, he says he’s wearing a pair of Saint Laurent jeans that served as the inspiration for MNML’s F36—though, in this case, “inspiration” isn’t entirely accurate. But he says his gear can hold its own. “The key to our success has just been partnering with amazing factories. We have probably the best wash house in China,” M says. “I see brands that make denim in LA or overseas. I walk into Barneys and I’m looking at $300 jeans and I’m like, ‘Your wash sucks.’ Our wash factory nails it.” He takes pride in the quality of his products because he’s done his due diligence in what he’s sourcing and who he works with. He knows he wouldn’t be able to keep costs so low if everything was sourced and manufactured in LA. “The minimums are absolutely insane. It takes forever,” he explains. “It’s the apparel business, so if you want to be successful, especially if you have a fast-fashion brand, you’re definitely producing overseas.” M. admits that, as someone who cares about fashion, he sometimes feels guilty about replicating the work of popular, trendsetting brands, but doesn’t get too bent out of shape. “At the end of the day,” he says, “it’s a wash and some holes in jeans. And it’s about giving people the look that they want for less.” Jerry Lorenzo couldn’t disagree more with MNML’s claim to being a sort of streetwear Robin Hood. “I don’t want to hear that they’re doing some service to people who can’t afford our product. If you want to do a service, go give some clothes to the homeless. Selling a pair of $100 jeans to a kid isn’t providing a service to him,” he says. In response, MNML’s designer M. sees things differently. “If a student can spend $64 for a pair of quality jeans as opposed to hundreds or even thousands of dollars to look good, I think that is a service to a degree. Even though we do donate to charity on a regular basis, MNML is obviously a business and we feel we are offering something of value to our customer.” Courtesy of MNML Courtesy of MNML To Lorenzo, what these upstart fast-fashion labels do is extremely damaging to his brand, especially when they’re able to knock off his designs before he can get the authentic product to customers. But he’s most frustrated by the idea that someone will mistake their gear for his. “It took us a lot of time and work to nail those proportions and details, and they’re stealing our designs and passing them off as their own,” he says. “No one knows that their track pants aren’t Fear of God, and so when they see it they might think, ‘That’s a $900 track pant?’ because their quality sucks, and that’s damaging to what we’re doing.” According to Lorenzo, MNML goes a step further than say a Zara or a Topman. The big brands might adopt his design language like side zippers and oversized fits, but not the whole design itself. “I take seeing pieces inspired by mine at, like, Topman or Zara as a sign we have influence,” he says. “But when you see a track pant or hoodie with the same seams, proportion, colors, and zipper placements, it’s just stealing. That brand built its entire brand off of our proposition. It’s like erasing our name off the homework assignment, putting yours on it and saying you did the work,” he says of MNML. But MNML isn’t willing to sell the farm on the fact that they are stealing designs, per se. “Our aim is to offer affordable fashion, and we are following the model that Zara, Topman, and H&M laid,” says M. “The only difference between them and us is those companies make poor quality clothes, billions of dollars and they don’t pay attention to the details.” He says his clothing is inspired by multiple sources, no different than any other designer or brand, and the number of styles of denim he’s producing, along with the positive customer feedback he receives, is proof that he’s doing right by the customer. MNML Track Pants Fear of God’s Fifth Collection Fear of God Track Pants Legally speaking, however, Lorenzo’s options may be limited, as his designs don’t rely on heavy branding or ornamentation—marks, like Adidas’s three stripes or Nike’s swoosh, that are easier to copyright. Still, Lorenzo says his legal team is currently working on how to address MNML and companies like it. Previously, Fear of God took legal action against Represent for a bomber jacket Lorenzo felt was too close to his own—an issue that he says has since been resolved. (For what it’s worth, Represent still sells a bomber jacket that is quite similar to the one Fear of God made back in 2014.) Micro-trends, Instagram marketing, aggressive litigation: the world of independent fast-fashion is in its Wild West period. And that’s all because these brands want to serve a much savvier consumer than the retail world has ever seen. They’re online, they know the trends, and they know how much they’re willing to spend to get them. In their pursuit of young, cool customers, these labels are not unlike their more profitable elders. And some of these independent labels can even stake a legitimate claim to delivering designer looks to the masses for less, without all of the negative connotations that come with fast-fashion mall shopping. For now, though, the line between counterfeit and inspiration remains blurry. And while a label like Represent can use its indie status as cover for trend-hopping, they want to expand: Represent plans to open its own store in 2018. And as indie fast-fashion jumps into the big leagues, a these companies will have to confront a challenge: they’ll run the risk of becoming the very thing they set out to disrupt.

For the first time, the event will also include a series of technology talks. Over day two and three, about 20 speakers including Zalora Group CEO Parker Gundersen and Goldman Sachs senior vice-president Andy Tai will speak on the business and technology of fashion.

The annual show has also been cut to three days this year, the first time in the show’s 11-year history.

“In this age of digital…

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Finding a Balance: Creative Control and Success in the Music Industry

I. Introduction

Music is an influential part of society; always has been and always will be. It is a $16 billion industry here in the United States and is projected to be a $43 billion industry worldwide (Facts, 2016). Millions of people make a living off of this wildly popular art form, and we will be looking at how they affect this global industry and likewise how this global industry affects them.

A few moments in the history of the music industry (1950’s and 1970’s) will be overviewed to build a groundwork for the conversation of creative control. Knowing where this industry has been based for the last 70 years is important in knowing how it got to where it is now and what its future looks like. This research also seeks to better understand the relationships between artists and labels as well as between artists and consumers. Music has become a well-integrated part of American culture, and for the last century or so it has grown as an artistic, multibillion dollar industry. Looking at the effects of this integration will give us necessary information about evolving artist-label relationships, differing revenue streams changing with the rising popularity of music, and the industry’s evolving relationship with its consumers. Along with this huge growth and change, artists have more options when it comes to creative control of their work. Creative control is something artists have to sort of balance with their success. Record labels exist to promote, distribute for, and profit from the artists they hire. In some cases this works out great for everyone involved, but in others it can lead to a poor artist-label relationship, a lack of creative control for the artist, or a disappointed consumer. Looking at how technological advancement has affected these relationships will give insight into why an artist may choose to embrace a record deal or work as an independent artist.

There’s a lot to talk about, but essentially: 1) Record labels controlled physical sales of music, so record labels basically control artists; 2) Popularity of internet is making physical sales obsolete; 3) Record labels no longer control artists to the extent that they did in the past; and 4) you don’t need a label to succeed anymore, and therefore creative control is much more in the hands of the artists than it was back then.

II. The History Lesson

a. Music Industry in the 50’s

The music industry has been controlled by huge multinational music groups. In 1950, one of these large music labels, Hollandsche Decca Distributie, became Philips Phonografische Industrie. Aside from this large change, there were still four other major labels; Decca Records (British), Columbia-CBS Records (American), Electric and Music Industries (British), and Music Publishers Holding Company (American, later became Warner Music Group). So all the multinational conglomerates of the music industry consisted of five corporations located in only two countries (Record Label, 2017).

Major labels have controlled the marketing and distribution aspects of music since physical music sales became popular in the 50’s. Their immense market shares give them all the resources they need to promote their artists. From controlling what’s played on the radio to packaging of CD’s and vinyl’s, major labels could keep the overhead costs of producing music lower than anybody else because of their seemingly endless resources.

Record labels were around before the 50’s (Columbia Records being the oldest, founded in 1887), but the early 1950’s is when the 45 rpm vinyl record came to be and the first major growth of the industry along with it. 7-inch 45 rpm vinyl discs sounded better than their 78 rpm shellac disc predecessors and were also much cheaper to make, so people could all of a sudden afford to own all the music they liked hearing on the radio or whatever.

The music industry is an economy of scale, and that just means put a little in get a little out, put a lot in get a lot out. In a pre-digital age, this shows why record labels were such a powerhouse; they were a golden scenario for an up-and-coming band. A record deal represents putting a lot in, and the marketing power that came with a record deal is where the band could potentially get a lot out. Simply the percent of a label’s budget that went into marketing for a band was huge, and having your name plastered pretty much everywhere can do a lot for a band’s commercial success. These were times when physical music sales were incredibly popular and having your CD on the shelf of the local music store was the best step in the right direction in terms of being successful. This growth peaked in the 1990’s but the growth existed and thrived for decades before then.

b. Music Industry in the 70’s

Over the last fifty years there has been a great move to consolidate the media industries. Whether it be print, music, television, or film, the majority of content is being produced and owned by a smaller and smaller number of corporations, huge multinational conglomerates now referred to as the Big Three. The premise of each of these deals was that with each acquisition, the resultant larger company could keep production and distribution costs lower, and could have even bigger access to the public and so could generate bigger sales on higher margins than either company individually. This worked for decades and is the reason that we are left with three major music labels internationally. Essentially an oligarchy of companies controlling music distribution made them an artist’s only option for success.

You have the major labels, Warner, Universal and Sony, that manage almost 90% of music industry revenue (Satariano, 2014), but then there are tons and tons of small, independent record labels (“indie” labels) that cater more to local, lesser-known artists. Few independent labels were able to establish themselves before the late 1970’s because of the immense power that the major labels had in terms of the distribution of music. But a few independent labels like Pinnacle and Spartan were able to establish an effective means of distribution eventually. As independent labels have become more popular, they have become a feasible avenue for up and coming artists to make a career.

In addition to being unable to market your album unless a label was backing you, two problems that artists have faced in the past regarding releasing their music, independent of the funding and connections of a label, are access to studio space and connections with retailers (Arditi, 2014). These were some of the barriers that prevented artists from being successful outside the funding of major labels.

c. Music Industry in the Now

Major labels still hold the power for physical distribution, but the internet lessened the demand for physical music. Music sales have been trending away from physical sales and towards streaming. Subscription streaming services more than offset declines in unit based sales of physical and digital music download products in the first half of 2016 (RIAA, 2017), so the industry is growing again after a good decade of financial losses every single quarter. An artist can make a spotify account and have their music made accessible to their huge base of listeners for a lot less time/money/effort than a record label telling you they can do it for a huge percent of your profit. Now obviously there’s still the issue of promotion; how can an artist that doesn’t have all the resources of a record label make any sales? Well there’s the internet for that.

The internet has done a lot in terms of empowering artists to not be forced into record deals anymore. Chance the rapper, Joey Bada$$, Macklemore, Tyler the Creator; these are all examples of artists that have gotten popular just as independent artists and arguably the internet had a major role in their roads to fame. I like this quote by Chance the Rapper; “Label deals suck, that’s just the truth of it. People believe you have to be discovered by a higher power, who hires you and takes a percentage, but in reality, you have to garner a fan base on your own.” Being discovered may have been relevant back in the 70’s, but nowadays he is absolutely right; being your own marketing division through social media is so easy to do and has such huge benefits for virtually no cost.

The two problems that artists faced in the 70’s of studio space and connections with retailers have been addressed and somewhat fixed by more modern technology. Nowadays, recording technology is cheap/small enough that artists can reasonably afford to have their own home studio to record their music (this also reduces pressure to finish an album not having to pay to use the recording equipment by the hour).

d. Music Industry in the Future; Thriving as a Global Economy

1. Growth of Online Music; Streaming as a Vessel for Growth

This consolidation of media that began 50 years ago, particularly music, was relevant before the internet because of the cost of distribution; making the CD’s/vinyls, packaging them, selling them to distributors, etc. These physical sales have been taken over by digital sales for the first time just this last year, and that trend is only going to continue with the rising popularity of music streaming services worldwide, growing almost 750% in the last five years (Goldman Sachs Research, 2017).

The building of legal online downloading platforms—the most notable of which being iTunes—was the start of the music industry’s long, arduous transition to online marketing and sales, this being later adapted into the subscription services we are most familiar with today (Spotify, Pandora, stuff like that). With changes like file-sharing and digital music, ownership of music is no longer as important as access to music. Therefore paying for services like Spotify, and having access to catalogs of millions of songs represents a better deal nowadays. Instead of paying per song by way of say digital downloads, you are paying per month to have access to virtually any song you can think of, and that’s why subscription-based streaming services are becoming so popular.

2. Piracy’s Effect on the Industry as a Whole

Up until the 1990’s, the music industry was thriving in their ability to control the physical sale of music, but the rise in popularity of the internet led to an increase in file-sharing and direct-to-consumer distribution, but mostly just digital piracy, and along with it a decline in physical music sales. Launched in 1999, Napster was a site that combined a music-search function with a file-sharing system; a perfect combination for making music a vulnerable target for piracy.

Relating back to the main idea, these losses of sales mean artists aren’t making as much money as they should. Artists making less money potentially means their creativity is being throttled through mindsets like, “I’ll only make money if I make radio single-type songs”, or, “I’ll only make money if the label keeps liking what I’m making.” Money has a lot of power in this industry, but being that it is growing into a more and more digital-centric industry, its artists, as well as the product they produce, as a whole are being heavily affected by technological advancements.

The best way to combat piracy, however, is convenience. If you make it cheap enough/easy enough to legally purchase music legally, then piracy will decrease. It’s this great morality issue where people are forced to ask themselves, “how scummy am I for stealing this when I could easily pay the $X and just buy it?”

III. Making it big at the cost of creative freedoms

a. Creative control

Creative control for artists has been a controversy since artist-label relationships have existed. As an artist, the way you make music is, in however small a way, influenced by the label you are signed to. Avoiding this issue can be done by staying an independent artist, but this can lead to other difficulties involving marketing and distribution. Artists have to decide how they want to be a part of the industry, through the three avenues of 1) signing to a major label, 2) signing to an independent label, or 3) being an independent artist. Each has its benefits and drawbacks, and everything depends on what the artist wants to get from their career.

This major label/indie label/independent decision for an artist will also have an impact on how they will be pressured to create music. Creative control is essential to an artist ("Creative Control issues for artists", 2012), but it will often result in a balancing act. Artists have to balance creative control with financial gain. Do artists want to be free to do what they want and basically have no money (independent), or do they want to give up creative control to some extent and have a lot of money (Major label route, or “selling out”). Independent artists make up one end of the spectrum, and it means there is no influence from a corporation in what you make; you do all your own recording, marketing, distribution; the whole nine yards. Signing to a major label is the opposite end of this metaphorical spectrum, where you will get all the funding you need at the cost of creative liberties in your musical style. Independent (“indie”) labels are anywhere in between really, depending on the individual artist or label. The independent labels usually aimed their releases at a small but devoted audience, not relying on mass sales for success, giving artists much more scope for experimentation and artistic freedom (Wikipedia; “Indie Labels”). So where you end up as an artist comes down to how you want to approach the music industry; are you in it for the money or for your own art?

Artists want to control as many aspects of their music as they can, but it’s easy to get sucked into the corporate structure as an artist. In addition to maintaining creative control, you also want to be a success, to have lots of people being exposed to your music, make money from it, and for people to value your creative vision as an artist as much as you do. The corporate structure can have a negative influence on maintaining your artistic vision.

b. Physical Distribution Becomes Obsolete; Major Labels Lose Power

Although it seems to be growing more and more obsolete, the revenue from physical music sales, CDs, vinyls, etc., still makes up a third of total music sales in the U.S. Organizational influence on recorded music: a look at the independents, by Ulf Oesterle, explores the influence record labels exert on the content of popular music. Major labels control 82% of physical sales of music in the forms of recording, manufacturing, and distribution outlets. This was back in 2005 but that figure hasn’t changed much. They still control about 80% of music sales as of this year (McDonald, 2017).

Since physical sales still make up 30% of total revenue, however, it is still worth mentioning. When a CD sits on a store shelf, it has already incurred a number of costs that are incorporated into the price of the CD. The price of manufacturing and packaging each CD ranges from one to two dollars, depending on the number of CDs being printed and the type of packaging that comes with it (Hull, Hutchison, and Strasser). On top of the cost to manufacture the CD is the actual cost to get the CD from the manufacturer to the retailer. Most distributors charge about $1.70 for each CD shipped (Hull, Hutchison, and Strasser 255). Additionally, the retail stores have their own costs and profits that they work into the price of a CD. A standard CD is sold for $12 wholesale, but the retail price is often around $17; this means that approximately five dollars of the price of a CD is a surcharge for the ability to purchase a CD at a store (Hull, Hutchison, and Strasser). The largest part of the cost of a CD is in the gross margin of the record labels, which can be from $5.51 to $6.86 depending on the rate of artist royalties (Hull, Hutchison, and Strasser). Understanding the manufacturing and distribution costs that are figured into the price of a CD is important because they contribute to the market value of the CD (Arditi, 2014).

All these costs put into a CD are represented by what is called intermediaries, all the middle men that take their own percentages. This long list of intermediaries exists with physical distribution between an artist producing an album and that album being put on the shelf at a record store. But the internet has cut out a lot of those intermediaries through digital distribution. One file of the album can be copied and shared limitless times, while physical distribution involves making copies of the album on CD’s. Making CD’s costs a lot of money relative to…the zero cost of digital distribution. An artist can upload their album straight to an online distributor without any of the hassle involved with selling music as a physical unit. David Arditi talks about this concept of disintermediation in his article, iTunes: Breaking Barriers and Building Walls. The major labels, having controlled the means of production and distribution since forever, were being interrupted by the power of the internet to share, buy, and listen to music virtually.

In recorded music the artist or band made of several musicians is often thought of as the main vehicle that brings a song from an idea through to the final album version. In some cases this is true but there are often others influencing the final version of a song. Some roles are more active in influence than others on the creative process including artist and repertoire representatives, record producers and the CEO or owner of the label. So you, as an artist, will have to change the sound of your music, sometimes a little and sometimes a lot, to fit the mold that the label has in mind. Now of course there are a lot of labels to choose from and lots of molds that might line up with your sound a little better, but the fact of the matter is that labels exist to make money, and if they don’t see you as a potential source of profit, they will try to alter your sound through a bunch of different filters, be it the A&R division, producers, etc., or they just won’t want to sign you.

Maintaining your own vision under a major label is a bit tougher than it seems however. You also have to fit into the creative vision of the label—how they present themselves to the public through their advertising as well as the artists they sign—if you want their oodles of money. The ones in charge of retaining or sculpting a labels public image/sound is the Artists and Repertoire division.

Artists and Repertoire is the division of a record label or music publishing company that is responsible for talent scouting and overseeing the artistic development of recording artists and songwriters (Cook, 2005). These guys basically have the most influence over how much your sound will change between being signed to the label and getting your album released. They essentially represent the creative interest of the label and exist to pick and choose basically what they like and don’t like from your songs. So what that means is they might tell you to make some minor edits to a song or two, or they might tell you to cut a track or two. Sometimes it might be in your best interest to take the creative direction they’re giving you, but other times it can be seen as a hindrance on your vision–your integrity as an artist. This isn’t as much of a problem when you’re a superstar, however.

c. Income Inequality in Music; The Rich get Richer

If you’re a big artist you can have more leverage to do what you want; you’re already well-known and you can sell albums pretty much regardless of what you put out. For example, anything Drake makes, good or so-so, sells over half a million copies in its first week (XXL, 2017; Billboard, 2017). Maybe you’re so big, you have your own record label (and this is a big list)–Jay Z with Roc Nation, Ray Charles with Tangerine Records, Led Zeppelin with Swan Song Records, Kanye West with GOOD Music (Diply, 2017)—then the only person you answer to in terms of creative direction is yourself. But the point is big artists have more room to makes demands in terms of creative control, essentially more room to fail, while small artists have to sort of conform to their label just to stay signed, essentially having no room to fail.

Those superstar artists listed previously make it pretty hard for smaller artists in terms of economic opportunity. But that’s pretty obvious; it probably doesn’t surprise you that the top 1% of artists earn 77% of the $2.8 billion in global revenue from all avenues of music sales (Resnikoff, 2014). The music industry in America has always reflected greater economic trends, meaning music revenue that goes directly to the top 1% of artists has doubled since the 1970’s (Vandiver, 2013), and now for every $1000 in music sold, the average musician makes $23.40.

Artists are therefore facing challenges economically as well as financially. Between labels telling them how to make their music and more successful artists earning wildly disproportionate amounts of revenue, it is difficult to make music into a living. But although it may seem like record labels have a lot of power over the artists they sign, that power is being called into question because of the internet.

Well-known artists are found all over this major-indie-independent spectrum, so there isn’t an end all be all solution for what will make you a success in this industry. Their experiences with the industry will naturally have differed–record deals are not all the same, labels are not all the same—but finding something that works well for them is likely the key to their success.

IV. Conclusion

Music is becoming a dominantly digital form of media, just like newspapers, television, or film have become in the last decade or so. Big labels had power over artists back in the day because physical sales made money and big labels pretty much had a monopoly on physical sale and distribution channels. But now that the internet cuts out the need for physical distribution (CD’s and the like are basically obsolete), artists can get rich and famous without the absolute necessity of a record deal. Because major labels are losing their pseudo-monopoly on selling music to things entities like streaming services and independent labels, that means artists have more diversity in their choices on how they want to succeed as artists. Creative control is something that an artist can actually control instead of the only feasible option is signing away your control to the record company.

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