#but like. i know i complain abt my parents sometimes but it touches my heart deeply

[jynersq]

girls when it is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better... the credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat

[landlordevil]

Hello. I would like to know about the special teifling. I hear lying comes so easily to their forked tongue.

2-4 (please I must know about the family dynamics, please), 15, 16, and 23

(๑¯﹀¯๑)

HI BESTIE and favorite person to complain about this game with <3333

Lying comes SO easily to their forked tongue. I forgot abt it until I started playing as them again and Asty got inspired three separate times in the span of a few hours. He loves it when his boygirlfriend lies

2. Does your Tav have any siblings? Are they close?

Eins has a younger half-sister! They're not super close because they became half-siblings when Eins was already an adult but they're very affectionate w their family so they'd still kill for her... she's in her angsty teen phase now but Eins is unflappable so they're still like Yay family time ^_^ I love my sister who wants to kill me sometimes <333

3. Who was your Tav raised by?

Eins' mom is a cambion and their dad is a Zariel tiefling, so I'd like to think other tieflings recognize they've got a little more devil in them than most... I do think the vestigial wings they have in-game eventually sprout to become small wings- not large enough to fly with but enough to be really cute. Now they gotta DIY their outfits to be backless. But their parents divorced when they were young so Eins was mostly raised by their mom and her new Halfling wife!!! They're so in love it warms Eins' heart but could be sickening to the cynical crowd...

4. Is your Tav close with whoever raised them?

Eins doesn't stay in touch with their dad but DOES stay in touch w their moms... until the tadpole. They were too afraid to write- What would they write? Would their parents try to come looking for them and only find a mind flayer? Would it put them in danger?- so I imagine they come home one night after months of no communications and get the biggest earful of their life...

15. Answered this so I'll answer number... 9! Eins has the criminal backstory, which for me amounts to doing odd, less than legal jobs, occasionally stealing, and making temporary allegiances whenever it suited them... it was generally in pursuit of the greater good though. They've used their skills as a fighter to intimidate patriars, worked construction for a while, worked at a clothier until the store owner realized they were just giving outfits away for free and didn't gaf about making any profit... what a rascal

16. What's your Tav's favorite childhood memory?

Probably festival time!!! IDK what festivals are like in Baldur's Gate but I love the idea of little Eins dressing up to go listen to music and dance <3 they have music in their SOUL they should have been a bard TBH but they lack any and all musical talent. Kind of unrelated but when they make you play a song to [character you haven't met yet so I won't spoil it] I imagined it going just abysmally, real charlie kelly energy, so someone else had to step in and finish the job LMAO.

23. Share any hcs/anything you want to say about your Tav's backstory

HMMMMM well pre magic mirror update I had the headcanon that Eins changed their primary sex characteristics at random depending on the day (which has now become canon, thanks Larian!). They love sweetbreads, sometimes they lie about stupid things that don't matter just to see if anyone notices, they love to sing when they travel which used to get on everyone's nerves but once they all got a little closer it became charming, even to lae'zel (one of their closest friends who loves to hate on them all the time)

Also for a more serious headcanon I imagine that shortly after meeting Sebastian in Cazador's crypts Eins runs into a friend of theirs in that same cell, who had been taken only weeks before. But suddenly it all feels too real- the hypothetical "would it have been me in that cage?" that Astarion couldn't answer, didn't even want to think about, becomes a very resounding "yes". I think Astarion even tries to defend it- like it wasn't me! one of my siblings! she's only been in there for a few weeks!- It's the only time the companions have ever seen Eins that angry, angry at Cazador, angry at the world that let this happen, angry that so many people are considered this disposable... and they do lash out at Astarion when he tries to ascend as a result. Not one of their proudest moments, the both of them. But they came out of it OK, or as OK as they can be <3

Anyways TY and TY for sharing your run of BG3 with meeeeee I love hearing about it always and forever and thank you for letting me put Halsin's sex scene on your TV just so we could laugh at the way he leans against that tree

[nanasarea]

Na Jaemin as your idol bf

Genre: fluff

Pairing: jaemin x idol!reader

Prompt: na jaemin being the best bf 

Request: Hey! I love your idol!nct series it’s so cute! I was wondering if you can if you could write one for jaemin? the dreamies are really killing it right now

Word count: 1180 (i might have gotten carried away haha)

a/n: next idol bf is chenle so watch out for that in the next few days also me and proofreading still haven’t met.

Haechan /  Yuta / Mark / Jeno /  Chenle / Renjun / Jisung / Jaehyun

you were childhood friends with Haechan

so when both of you got into the kpop industry

neither of you were surprised

he did debut before you 

and he kept teasing you for it

insisted you call him your senior 

so because you two were friends, 

you spent a lot of time together

even in your trainee days,

you would have practice and then go to get boba after

sometimes that meant more than just you and hyuck

sometimes that meant his attractive friends would join

who you may or may not have a crush on

but that’s not the point right now

jaemin is naturally flirty

may i remind you that he doesn’t even know if he’s flirting?

like he did with the nurse back in his predebut days?

yeah, that

he does that with you

and you try not to blush 

but who are you kiddin

you’re cheeks are as hot as the sun 

hyuck, being one of your best friends, catches on 

and he insists on bringing jaemin everywhere

and i mean everywhere

you plan on going to an internet cafe?

jaemin is there

you get a call from haechan to play a game?

jaemin is there

you go for after-practice ice cream?

shocker!

jaemin is there

he’s a smart boy 

he realizes why you’re so flustered around him

so it’s not long until he makes a move

you end up going on a date 

walking beside han river

eating ice cream

and getting to know each other 

you knew a lot before

but not it was a different way of getting to know each other

because you and hyuck have been friends before debut, 

people knew that seeing you together meant nothing

just two bros chilling 

so when they saw you and jaemin, 

they thought nothing of it

they’ve seen you, hyuck, jaemin and other members hang out loads

so they figured you were hanging out without them this time

which was perfect for jaemin

he did not like the idea of being secretive 

he loves his fans, 

he doesn’t want to hide things from them

and sneaking around was just way too much work

sure, you couldn’t kiss in public yet

which made him whine A LOT

but it was better than nothing

once you got serious

the agency/agencies decided to confirm it

was anyone actually shocked?

no

does that mean everyone was supportive?

no

but he didn’t care,

he knew real fans wouldn’t be mad at him

they’d be happy for him

(yes this is me being salty abt ppl unstaning and being mean to jaemin bc of the dating rumors, which ended up being fake anyway)

so let’s say your album just came out recently

he goes to the store

and buys 48 albums himself

does he need them?

YES HE NEEDS ALL THE Y/N CONTENT POSSIBLE

sure, jisung gets lowkey mad that now he has less space in the room for his stuff

but jaemin doesn’t care

he needs to support his baby ???

VARIETY SHOWS

he did not care about the cameras

he want to hug you?

he hugs you

he wants to hold your hand?

he will hold your hand

and if he wasn’t allowed for some reason?

he’d hold your hands behind your backs

same for award shows

whenever your seats are close, 

he’s not with his members

he’s with you

loves when your schedules overlap

you’re both at music core?

you bet he’s glued onto you

whenever he can

3 seconds after getting his hair done, 

he runs to you

“jaemin, if i’m gonna have to redo that, i will slap you” - stylist

like he cares tho

if he wants to hug his baby, he’s hugging his baby

photographer na 

his ig is filled with the best photos of you

and your ig?

half of the posts have 

📷 by Photographer Na

because he wants his credit

if not, he nags

have i mentioned he will sulk to you about jisung not accepting his affection?

rants for 3 hours 

“-what does that even mean? I basically raised him, I should be his favorite hyung, not chenle! he doesn’t even call chenle hyung! I’m his hyung, the one who cooks for him, cleans up after him, do-”

after that, you need to cuddle him for an additional 3 hours

other than jisung being “an ungrateful brat” (jm’s words)

he doesn’t really complain about much

he does however listen to your complaining 

with the biggest smile on his face

is literally so comforting

you know how people have their own love languages?

he uses all of them for you

words of affirmation? 

he will literally compliment you for breathing

gifts?

unexpected gifts, 

sometimes he buys you a necklace you wanted

sometimes he makes you a cute origami love note

acts of service?

cooks for you whenever

you say you’re hungry and he’s already cooking a 5 course meal

quality time?

takes you to walk along the han river

and just talk

he likes it because it reminds him of your first date

and physical touch?

do i even need to explain?

you end up going on a variety show 

where you interact with kids

and jaemin is just like O.o

he’s the mom friend

so when he sees that

he knows he wants a baby

not now of course

but he’s already planning the names

let’s just say that

speaking of babies

jeno and jaemin  parent duo?

nah now it’s y/n and jaemin parent duo

sorry jeno, he still loves you but like y/n

and you best bet you lose your mind in the middle of it all

jisung and renjun are screaming because of aliens

jeno is screaming out of frustration of being assigned with washing dishes again

haechan is screaming because he isn’t getting attention

then jeno and haechan are screaming because one of them is a sore loser and the other is a confident winner

chenle is just screaming

jaemin is internally screaming

and so are you

you end up leaving them to continue doing....

that 

while you two try and calm down in another room

interpret that as you will 

c o l l a b 

s t a g e

the stage presence is boom

*lucas voice*

y/n boom

jaemin boom

together

BOOM

we got that boom boom boom boom 

you end up being korea’s it couple

i said what i said

convinces you to start acting

so you can star in a drama together

each other’s love interest tho

nothing else is acceptable

because even tho he knows it’s just acting

your lips are just for him

and it shall stay that way

mkay

he doesn’t get jealous that easily when he sees you interact with other idols

but let’s just say this

you touched someone’s arm when you were an mc

and he went feral

“my precious y/n, your hands belong on my body, and my body only, no one else, got that?”

you didn’t know if you should be turned on

or laugh

maybe both?

to sum it up: jaemin best boy(friend)

Someone call an ambulance, my heart isn’t my heart anymore, it’s jaemin’s part-time apartment, why part-time? because when he isn’t living in my heart, he’s living in my brain.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

[sootygoggles]

Parent!Paranoia Sanders Sides AU!

No explanation, but I'll probably give the backstory later. For now: memes of Paranoia being an A-class parent and a chaos gremlin. (okay it started as memes but then just ended up as fleshing the AU out)

~~

Paranoia, worried abt his kids: I'm uhhhh gonna go to my room see ya later light sides

Paranoia, sneaking back into the subconscious to check on his now teenaged children: I'm gonna leave duke a r a t that I found and thought looked cool

Duke, waking up the next morning and yelling for 'Nesty bc "HOLY CRAP NESTY LOOK AT THIS RAT ISN'T SHE ADORABLE I WANNA HANG HER ON THE WALL": !!!!!!!!!!

~~

Paranoia gets a habit of sitting on the fridge because his children were wild as kids and sometimes duke comin at you with a knife warrants jumping onto counters

~~

Nesty, who doesnt get paid to deal with duke: I'm raiding dads liquor cabinet it's my due for putting up with this

Paranoia, physically manifesting: put the key to the liquor cabinet D O W N, Honesty

~~

The lights are confused as to why he disappears at random times of the day and night and he just "leave me TF alone before I leave you a goshdarn diddly P R E S E N T while youre sleeping I'm tired"

~~

patton: my child! my dark strange son!!

paranoia, who has children: ,,,,yea ok

~~

Patton ticks him off so he leaves a big halloween decor spider on his bed and nobody sleeps for weeks after that bc pattons too scared to touch it and paranoia maybeperhaps glued it onto his cover

~~

He's like one of those people you know might mean well but ooooooo boy theyre pushin buttons

~~

Paranoia, whos fav animal/insect is spiders and whose children have tarantulas and snakes on the regular: hes not even realistic!! You need to learn to get along with mr sparkles patton!! look at him. he's fluffy!

~~

He has googly eyes and glitter on him at all times of course hes named mr sparkles

~~

paranoia gets to be a little petty. as a treat

~~

Paranoia just carries bags of glitter around and whenever mr sparkles gets duller he takes mr sparkles to the kitchen counter and he dumps glitter on him

Logan and patton are tired of cleaning up bc paranoias just petty enough to make their counters eternally sparkly

~~

"why is there glitter all over the kitchen?"

paranoia, holding mr sparkles: :)

~~

Paranoia, after AA: I hate purple but they dont know that now do they

Paranoia is actually orange the last side is purple lol

~~

Chaos Gremlin dark sides and nobody is surprised bc paranoia raised them

~~

paranoia, going back to see his teen children after acting like a teen all day: what is up, fellow kids

honesty: i am going to lose it

~~

Wrath, coming to yell at them to keep it down: why are you purple I'm purple

Paranoia, cackling bc finally I can get out of this horrible color: *snaps fingers * I'M PARANOIA MOTHERTRUCKERS HAVE FUUUNNNNN I'M GONNA BE MAKING YOUR LIVES LIVING HELL FROM THIS POINT FORWARDS

~~

duke and nesty, pumped for halloween bc u l t i m a t e s p o o k: :D

paranoia, coming out in a traffic cone costume with a shit eating grin on his face: :D

~~

Paranoia, decorating for halloween bc "oh I'm sorry it's just the *sniffles * homesickness and we a l w a y s decorated for halloween" knowing full well all of his decorations are spider and witch themed bc they all like the salem witch trials

~~

He leaves ONE fake snake in romans cereal and the lights just. Lose it. Hes kicked back into the subconscious to be chaotic with his kids, no new side, just the hours upon hours of film hes gotten from the bugs hed placed around the unconscious and a plan for the next several movie nights

He gets back and honesty is w h e e z i n g bc he was watching through the cracks and they make a fail compilation of the light sides

It takes like two months for the lights to just go insane with him around not due to yknow paranoia but bc hes such a gremlin

~~

Patton asks if he was raised by wolves and he shoves mr sparkles at patton saying "take the issue of how I was raised up with my father, a-hole!!"

He doesnt actually curse he just yells "A-HOLE" so loud his kids can hear

~~

They dont find out he's a dad until hes summoned and hes making cookies or smt with the kids and hes in a bright orange stereotypical witch outfit,,, corset and all and an apron that says "worlds most chaotic dad" on the front

And hes talking to one of the kids like "duke you can only put dish soap in your batch nesty cant digest it like you can"

~~

Patton has an apron that says worlds least chaotic 'dad' courtesy of paranoia he made it himself(read: he stole pattons good apron and scribbled over it in sharpie)

~~

Paranoia is always close to cackling when around the lights bc theyre newbs to any chaos

~~

Roman and remus are twins but roman is the kind of kid to promptly forget abt anyone and logan n patton knew remus less than a day before he "disappeared" aka ran to the subconscious to explore and theyve just kinda blocked him out

~~

Logans fine with it and actually likes the decorations tho he has asked if they had to be so brightly coloured and if there had to be so much glitter

I say decorations but hes a secret gremlin at heart and is super close to snickering at all times bc of the pranks

~~

Also yes paranoia mildly dads roman it's great but he dads in an older sibling type way

~~

So pat and logan are all "hes fitting in as an older brother well" and they tell him abt their approval of his older brother chaos and hes just like "no this is how I am deal with it nothing to do with brothers" bc hes not telling them abt his kids he doesnt trust them

~~

Hes up at like midnight complaining with logan abt how patton doesnt let him be full chaos gremlin and logan says "mmmhmm did your parents in the dark side let you go wild with the chaos" and paranoia just,,,,, looks at him, dead in the eyes, and says "I dont have parents"

Cue logan being confusion

Paranoia, who genuinely didn't have parents: my parents are mr sparkles and the cat we've had for my entire life

Logan, who doesnt know they had a cat and is now worried bc "are you taking care of it???": ???

Paranoia: it's great for keeping the Others in line tho I just say "do your chores or no snuggle time with ms peregrin" and they do their chores while I'm making dinner

logan, incredibly confused: i don't know what you mean but ok

Paranoia: yeah theyre dumb but it's the level of dumb youd expect from my idiots

~~

Or he slips up and refers to them as his children/kids and logan, not realizing they have an Actual Father/Sons relationship/age difference(paranoias abt.late 20s early 30s, remus defies all logic and has been about 9-10 for a few years now, and dees like early teens) just says "huh how.interesting would it be to have to deal with people your age that immature" and paranoias just. "Y e a h t h e y r e t o t a l l y t h e s a m e a g e a s I a m"

~~

Duke is very much baby and upon seeing duke eating glue paranoia and honesty the idiots decided to try it too

theyre so dumb dsdhdhdhjsdh

They AREEE and paranoia, after discovering that duke has the h a r d i e s t immune system they decide to test exactly what he can and cannot safely eat bc he may be dumb but hes also def a Dad and he just wants to take care of his kids and if that includes making sure that duke can safely consume toilet bleach then so be it

Duke can eat almost anything short of actual cyanide but cyanide just makes him sick like stomach bug sick

He somehow gets a fever,,,,, he has it for like half an hour and paranoia is amazed

Hes in bed,,,,, paranoia makes him soup,,,,,, hes all better and running around again

~~

Paranoias parenting rules:

Dont murder your brothers pls

Do your chores or no snuggle time with ms peregrin

Glitter is always a yes

Insults are fine just make sure you dont overstep and make your brothers insecure

all of them are printed and then the last one is scrawled at the bottom in

If you get sick, tell him immediately bc he will find out and he will be the most obsessive parent to make sure you feel better ASAP

If your pronouns/name/function change, tell him immediately, he'll make sure you dont feel uncomfortable as well as he can

Duke dont put dish soap in honestys baked goods you know he cant digest it

It's a nice system for making chaos but keeping it manageable

They're all printed then the last one's scrawled in glitter gel pen and duke wrote a reply that said (I'm sorry yall dont have as good an immune system as I do)

There was a whole passive aggressive arguement on the bulletin for the next week before it got taken down to make room for dukes art

They eventually started just putting them up over each other and using magnets instead of thumbtacks

The entire bottom portion of the walls are painted in chalkboard paint so theres no unerasable drawing on the walls and the rest of the paint is magnetic so they can hang pieces everywhere

Dukes improving rapidly tho and doesnt like looking at his old art all the time so paranoia holds onto the drawings in several filing cabinets in case he ever wants to do redraws or needs his original prints to make something in the Imagination

also bc,,, sentimental

jus a little

Yeah bc "yes my child draws nothing but blood gore and new animals but hes a creative genius and I love all of his art"

~~

Roman: anxiety I can see why you left

Paranoia: ??? What?? It's spoopy season??

Roman: there was BLOOD on the WALLS

Paranoia, internally: oh!!!! Duke perfected his blood recipe!!!!

Paranoia, externally: how did it taste?

Roman: WHO TASTES THE BLOOD ON THE WALLS?!?!

Paranoia: if it tasted like lemons or citrus you need to stay off of most foods, stick to crackers and broth- don't eat anything heavy until you're sure you wont throw it up

Patton, who was making cereal: ????

~~

Also!!!! @iliveinprocrasti-nation Thanks for helping me flesh this AU out!!!

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

ah yeah i suppose ur right. yeah i think quarentine has had that sort of effect on a lot of people :( sorry to hear abt ur strict parents, hopefully ur friend will be able to come back soon. small outings (even with family) are still good tho, make sure ur taking care of urself toff.

youre totally right! ah yes thats good advice (/gen) ill try and use that when im in a slump ty. any music suggestions?

lol sames. even some of the stuff abt seungmin, innie etc is a little uncomfortable, like theyre grown ass men for sure, but at the same time, theyre still young, still just over being a teenager in the grand scheme of things. (on that note, i do struggle with worrying that im infantalising them, obviously theyre adults but at the same time, theyre still young. i do treat all fictional characters as my children, but i guess its different when its real people. idk. what do you think?) yeah some stans rlly need to take a chill pill, some are rlly walking the wire between 'ah theyre attractive/that look rlly suits them' and making fucking smut fics abt minors, like... they do not see a problem with that?? yeah tbh i feel like unless theyre 18 they shouldnt be put into the spotlight, weve seen what it does to peoples mental health, but modern day kpop industry is a lot like old hollywood with a lot of popular child actors -_- hopefully the big companies will learn but i agree, its unlikely

suuuuure toff haha. ill go searching for them, but idk if ill be able to find the fluff needle in the angst haystack (jkjk) yeah, fair i groan and complain but you do write angst etc rlly well, so if its what ur comfortable with, then pls continue, it is one of your strong suits, well as you write fluff aside

ah okay good! ill continue to send you essays then

THE ALBUM YES. so ive been looking forward to it for literally months, this is actually my first skz album release as a stay (since the last on was 9 months ago) i was sitting there hitting refresh on my spotify the second 6pm kst came around. (speaking of which, how did you do the release? i couldnt decide whether to watch or listen first but i ended up on listening cos there would be more material) okay: so cheese was super cool, very skz ya know? tho i almost wish theyd made domino the title track, tho obv it was a more experimental track and would have been a bit controversial (much like whistle for bp) i looooved domino and thunderous was absolutely impeccable. all the songs were amazing but standouts were- secrets, secrets which lowkey made me tear up idk why, red lights which almost killed me (it did not have to go that hard, but it did) and OT8 WOLFGANG omgggg i wasnt sure if hyunjin was going to be included in it but i was hoping and, ya know people had said hed be in there, but the further i got in, the less i was sure and then BAM hyunjin started what had been jisung's part and i just sat there grinning for about 5 minutes. surfin was absolutely adorable and gone away almost made me cry AGAIN. star lost was so touching, almost a nod to hyunjins little star? silent cry was relatable beyond anything. SSICK was funny? for some reason I was laughing while it was playing, idk the combination of added cheering and minhos aggressiveness and the totall seriousness they sung it. but i rlly enjoyed it. sorry i love you showcased their vocals like nothing else. the view is THE BOP of 2021, absolutely going to be stuck in my head for the next decade, that hook is genius. what did you think?

also did you watch their grow up performance? with all the stays and ALL THE TEARS? ;n; i feel like this is the end of an era of skz and tbh im kinda happy but also sad. super excited for their promotions but super bummed they wont get to tour. ah well

<3 w.a. 🐺

answer under the cut bc i gave an equally long answer to this already long ask HAJSH

oh yeah, abt quarantine having an effect. my friend and i talked about this earlier actually. i didn't realize the world was moving so fast until the pandemic happened. being in quarantine gave me time to think and i got to know myself more. it's just the sole good thing i got out of the isolation lmao. and abt my strict parents, ironically i got to go out today so i got to hang out with a few of my bestfriends. i had fun but my legs are a bit sore from walking. but they're a different set of friends. i'll get to hang out with the others when my getaway driver comes home in december.

hmm music recommendations for writing? depends on the plot you're writing. care to share what story you're working on and i'll try to rake my brain for a song that might match the vibe. i listen to classical / lo-fi if i don't have song inspo for a fic because lyrics sometimes distract me.

i don't think that's infantilizing tho. for me, it has something to do with my environment and the way i was raised. maybe it's the same the other way around? like this certain age (for the ones above 18 but below 20) is thirst-able for them. idk really. it's just not for me ?n? what i do NOT condone is writing smut for minors??? like get checked : D // i agree with everything with the idols being 18+ before they debut simply because it's for the best for their well-being like. how can young idols decide that this shit is the thing they want to do for life? or at least until their contracts last. idk :// it's unfortunate that it's unlikely to happen.

WELL. i have a list so you won't have to go search for them! in class (minho), in the rain (seungmin), gladius maximus (chan) and you've read five star already. and i just realized that most, if not all, of my upcoming fics are fluffs and i'm fond of all of them :D i used to focus a lot on angst because fluff disgusted the living shit out of me. i think things changed when i wrote champagne problems and hurt myself so bad i wanted to drop angst entirely. i didn't, of course, but i allowed myself to be self-indulgent now.

for the release of the album, i was on twt and watched the vid at 12 views (if i remember correctly, i watched back door at 14 so HASJH) i’m gonna talk by track so it wont be too confusing? bc i wrote this in paragraph format and it just ???? beware im very picky with tracks even if they’re my ults. so no offense if we have opposing opinions and i’m not fond of reading lyrics so these are all music wise.

cheese - oh god i hated cheese at first listen but it grew on me easily. i was singing the yeahyeahyeahyeah bit all day today :D

thunderous - i cant say that it’s my favorite title track. it felt really dry sometimes, both mv and music wise. but at the same time, it’s not that bad. the choreography carried the song tho o.O it’s so fucking cool. but like go live, another track has my heart and it’s

domino - AND YES I AGREE THAT THEY SHOULDVE MADE DOMINO TITLE TRACK UGHHHHH WHAT A WASTED FUCKING OPPORTUNITY. WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS HOW FOND I AM OF THIS SONG. it stands close to the level i love easy.

ssick - was a skip on first listen too because i found the chorus underwhelming but it grew on me? not that much but i can bear listening to it.

the view - it’s something the gen public like, hence its something i dislike. im not fond of songs that are structured like this? it’s not a bad song, just not the type of song i like. but i agree that the hook is very not catchy but it would get stuck in ur head.

sorry, i love you - it’s not as sad as i expected but i actually like it??? i can’t wait to write a fic out of it (1) HAJSHAJ it’s like a 3/5 for me. it’s angsty but chill?

silent cry - i’m pissed at this song bc it hits but sometimes it doesn’t?@?#!? but it’s starting to grow on me but definitely not my fave track.

secret secret - glad i found a secret secret enthusiast because my irls thought it was a skip?$?#@$? it gives me ikon vibes and i’m a huge fan of ikon’s discog so this was a win for me T_T +

STAR LOST - gives me bigbang song vibes and now im very sad :(( in case u didnt know, i’m a hUGE yg fan and 2ne1/bigbang introduced me to kpop so when i heard this track that gave me yg feels i just <3___<3 and it’s one of my favorite tracks anw moving on,

red lights - I WANT TO SKIP THE FIRST TEN SECONDS OF RED LIGHTS EVERY TIME IT PLAYS LIKE IT MAKES ME FEEL AWKWARD KDSJFSK but fine. i’m adding this to props and mayhem’s playlist LMAO it’s more aggressive than sexc tho. more enemies to lovers o. O

surfin’ - this coming right after red lights just wasn’t the best decision arrangement wise because how did we go from ooh sexc to aigh pARTAY. felix saying sheesh T___T it’s such a fun song i want to go to the beach ;n; do you like beaches?

gone away - i have yet to read the lyrics because i’m using this as inspo for a jeongin fic jskjash it’s not the type of ballad i like but it’s so fucking sad to listen to :’ ) the pitch change caught me off guard? still does. it’ll grow on me prolly.

wolfgang - I YELLED WHEN I HEARD HYUNJIN IN WOLFGANG. i didn’t like this song until recently. it gives me the confidence boost i need to pick myself off self-esteem crashes.

and no i haven't watched that performance and i prolly wont because i’ll cry. i’m excited for the promotions too. do you think they’ll still have a repackage?? i cant fucking believe that i just finished waiting for 12am kst for skz teasers and now i have to look forward to 12am for nct 127??@?#? NOT A SINGLE DAY OF REST FOR THIS STAYZEN

[goldenscript]

childhood friend!seokmin

being forced to come to a family reunion isn’t the best

your aunts usually rag on you about getting a significant other, your uncles are always drunk,,, prolly telling you to invest whatever money you make at your job on them bc everyone is like 1000000000000000% sure that you’re gonna make it big,,, even your parents are a little lost in the madness

usually these sorts of shindigs are divided among factions i.e all the aunts together, the uncles together barbecuing or drinking, the new mothers are huddled with babies on their laps, and the kids are running around the backyard playing games

then there’s you,,, in that awkward in between of an adult age that’s too old to hang with the younger kids but still pretty young compared to the adults so you’re just ~there~

it’s not even like you don’t like spending time with your family or anything either - you just don’t know how to keep up with the drunk aunts and uncles or the little kids screaming their heads off

so you’ve resolved to just sitting on the couch in the garage where it’s relatively more chiller compared to the living room and the garage

the tv’s playing and you see a few of your cousins there with their friends but they’re in like middle school so you’re def’ not trying to “cramp their style” like you did at the christmas party lmao

and tbh it kinda sucks that you only have your phone to keep you company since you specifically remember how you used to have someone to play with when you were a kid

he wasn’t quite part of the family blood wise as he was as close as blood could probably get

he was like your dad’s brother’s friend’s son or something like that and you specifically remembered he loved going by dk

his parents reassured you that he wasn’t actually named donkey kong or anything but he did really love that videogame and he used to show you how to play after the family made him sing karaoke because the kid could s i n g

always the ballads and hits every single high note

Every

Single

One

none of the aunts or the uncles who think they can do it complain one bit either,,, like they’re literally cheering him on like he’s in some concert and always ask for encores

one time he even dragged you in on that mess and although you hated him for it, he made it really fun for you and,,, well,,, even ten year old you loved seeing his smile on him

so just remembering him makes you wonder what ever happened to him

like you’ve been to a huge majority of the parties,,, okay,, well, not all of them and you did stop recently because of school but coming out today makes you wonder if he’s coming

for a while that weighs on your mind, a part of you kind of anticipating him,,, even if you’re not that sure what he looks like anymore

perhaps luck is on your side because after a while you go inside (kinda forced by the grannies), congregating by the snacks table because food is important and you’re hoping this will stop your aunts from nagging you to eat (it doesn’t) and you hear some chatter off to the sides and even see a small crowd around the living room by the tv

somewhere in the mix is your aunt is trying to sing “my heart will go on” and it isn’t that terrible LOL she’s trying ok

there’s a head peeking from the top but you don’t think much of whoever it is as they make their way over,, one of the other aunts ushering him to go eat but you swear you see your dad’s brother’s friend

and seeing the boy coming towards you makes you think it’s who you’re hoping but,,, man, even if he isn’t,, he’s REALLY handsome

“oh seokmin! go eat ok? eat a lot!!! you must still be growing y’know” one of the lazier aunts beside you at the table is telling him

and you’re just like ‘holy shit that IS seokmin kjdsfhskhf’

he notices you as he’s grabbing some chicken wings and all that other good stuff and there’s this flash of recognition in his eye but he seems too shy to say anything and you’re certainly a lil’ put off because holy hell??? HE GOT SO HANDSOME KJSHSJKHFS

so that same aunt, not much older than either of you, is an evil lil’ shit because she just goes “so y/n, don’t you remember seokmin here???” she even turns to your other semi-drunk aunt like “wouldn’t they be cute together???”

and they’re just like agreeing and jabbering,,, about you two and everything else under the sun but you feel him nudge you and you look up to see him gesturing towards the kitchen

with their conversation straying away from you two you both escape into the kinda empty kitchen and you’re both kinda just awkwardly there because,,, did your aunt just do that?? is seokmin really here?? how did mother nature favor him so much???

to say the least, you feel pretty embarrassed especially when you’re looking at him and just really seeing how handsome he is as he leans against the kitchen counter with a plate of wings in hand

it’s funny to you just how much time has like changed you two because y’all used to be the same height and now here he is towering over you

though you do hope that his personality still remains as bright and sunny as usual and from the looks of it, he’s still that kinda shy boy who does nothing but eat and still not gain an ounce of fat like a secondhand talent

you can’t help but smile though since all you’ve ever felt is fondness toward him and you’re pretty resolved in keeping those memories close

and ok so he catches you smiling and he matches it with that full blown smile and goes “what??”

“sorry,,,” and when he gives you an inquisitive look because what are you sorry abt??? looking cute??? you say, “for my aunts,,, and i dunno having to hide out in here”

he just shakes his head and says, “nah, it’s fine. if they see me out there, they might make me sing again”

“do you still sing?”

“yeah, i still love it”

“that’s good” you feel like a warmth spread because,,, it just makes you happy that hasn’t changed - in a way, college has been a huge change for you and sometimes you feel like things are changing way too fast and even though you didn’t want to come to the party because of studying and all that, it makes you feel a little happy to be there and to see everyone and ask how they’ve been

at the least there hasn’t been much changes in your family gatherings besides the obvious physicals ones - they’re all still pretty nutty and talkative but all adorable and endearing in their own ways

as obnoxious as the drunken elders can get, you get so many laughs just watching them and hearing all their stories about their trips to like malaysia or hiking at yosemite,,, it’s all just really nice to hear about and so to see that seokmin is still that sunny boy makes you feel so,,, happy

even with this semi-awkward atmosphere settling in, you can’t help but feel at ease,,, just unsure of what to say

at least until one of the uncles saunters in and does this old joke with his teeth and the two of you react the same way as you both did as kids and jump and it causes the three of you to burst into this huge fit of laughter

this kind of paves the way for the two of you to talk and escape to the backyard where it’s a literal devoid of children (surprisingly) on the playground because they’ve all resolved on remaining in the garage where mario kart and wii games are all in session

at first it’s talking about childhood and change because you nervously bring up your aversion to it and he relates because the future is so scary and unpredictable but he also believes that keeping close to the comforts of nostalgia will do some good for the two of you - which is also why he came to the gathering !!! (that definitely makes you go !!!)

eventually you stray away from all the seriousness and even talk about all the memories you two shared and how happy those times were and it just feels so easy now to just update one another on what’s been going on like how he’s in the acapella group in school and he absolutely adores it and you tell him about how college is kinda killing you but you have a killer study abroad program coming up

though when that’s said he gets only a little sad and goes “you’re leaving me already? i just got you back” and he looks like such an adorable pup so you can’t help but pat his head and say “yeah but we’ll keep in touch this time right?”

he like lights up and gets a lil’ nervous because now that he doesn’t have the plate of chicken wings, having finished it before going to the playground, he holds his phone out to you a lil’ shakily and says “c-can i have your number?”

you’re a little awestruck even if you should’ve expected it but like i said seeing him as attractive and funny and sweet as he is, it feels like this could stir up trouble for you and your heart already

of course you give it to him and he gives you his and he looks so elated you can’t help but voice aloud, “god you’re so cute” and you go bright red because,,, Holy Shit,,,,, you really just said that but even more so, he goes super flushed in the cheeks and fumbles with a thank you

and after a moment of this stewing silence, he goes “you look really good too, y/n”

looking at him, you see how serious he is and how genuine he’s being,,, like it feels like there are stars in his eyes and makes your heart do a funny skip and your stomach does a flip

you’re about halfway with a thank you when your aunt comes in and becomes the two of you forth, mischief in her eyes because she totally just say you and seokmin having a moment and the two of you follow her and everyone is asking him to sing

and he’s like even more flushed because !!! they really love his voice and it really makes him happy and when he sees you he gets really happy - not only with nostalgia but with hope for a better relationship with you like he doesn’t know what’ll come with you two keeping in touch but he knows that he’s willing to take that change and go beyond just party buddies y’know?

so he does something daring because he remembers the look on your face back when you were kids when he did this and he looks at all the waiting faces and says “ok,,, i will But y/n has to sing with me”

your jaw drops and you’re ready to decline but everyone looks at you with these pleading, puppy like eyes and your aunt’s nudging you and sending a wink your way and when your gazes settles on seokmin,,, you really feel like you can’t say no

he has his hand out towards you and goes “c’mon, like old times?”

you don’t know what overcomes you but you also don’t mind the idea of stepping into this change because,,, well,,, it’s seokmin

he’s always made you feel at ease when you were younger and it really feels no different to now so you just,,, let loose

you take his hand, looking slightly begrudgingly but still smiling nonetheless, “thanks,,,dk”

he chooses what you think is some random ballad until you hear the first few notes and he just winks at you and says “seriously, anytime”

he lets out this really cute laugh and you feel the smile on your lips growing and he grins back at you because whatever else happens later can happen whenever, the only thing you two are focusing on rn are each other and that song (and your aunt totally whooping at you two LOL)

[edelgarfield]

Pls can u give us more feelings on victor katsuki pls im begging i love ur writing

you want me to tell you abt viktor katsuki

let me tell you abt viktor katsuki

viktor hasn’t so much as seen his own parents since he was a teen and he packed up his skates and fled to st. petersburg to train w/ yakov.

to viktor, the concept of “family” is meaningless. his rinkmates complain about their mothers and their fathers and at first viktor tries to Relate like “protip: hide in the closet until dad stops throwing things” or “start budgeting for when you inevitably run away” and his rinkmates are like “what the fuck I love my mom”

viktor is like what the fuck does that mean but learns to keep quiet.

during chris’s first junior worlds, a short woman with curly brown hair sits with him at the kiss and cry and when chris’s scores come in she showers him with kisses. viktor watches from afar and a flash of white hot jealousy goes through him. bc after all he’s done hasn’t he earned that at the very least?? doesn’t he deserve to be loved???

he thinks love must be close to the devotion in makka’s beady eyes, or the pride in yakov’s smile when his scores come back, or the sound of the crowd chanting his name (Viktor Nikiforov). he stands on the podium and holds his medal and thinks “so this is it. this must be love.”

viktor has such a big big heart filled with love and he pours it into everything he does. he loves skating and chris and yakov and makkachin with his entire being. he pours his heart out on the ice screaming “PLEASE LOVE ME.”

and they do love him, each in their own ways, but it’s not nearly enough. it doesn’t fix the years of his childhood he’s lost, and it doesn’t change the emptiness in his home or his heart.

and it’s so so tiring to love so much and to feel like you get nothing in return. viktor spends a long time thinking “so this is it. no one will ever love me.”

he spends a long time hating his name, hating the people who had a kid they weren’t prepared to love. “if they’d loved me i wouldn’t be like this” viktor thinks bitterly. but after a while even that gets tiring and he just feels numb.

“Nikiforov” means a lot of things in the skating world. but all it means to viktor loneliness, and watching love surround everyone but him.

and then he goes to japan.

he doesn’t know what he’s expecting when he shows up in Hasetsu. okay that’s a lie, he’s expecting to sweep yuuri off their feet and pick up right where they left off after sochi and probably get married in july? but he doesn’t get any of that. instead yuuri runs away.

for a while viktor sniffles into makka’s fur and thinks “so this is it. why did i think this time would be any different.” but then hiroko comes in with a tray of tea and dabs at his red eyes. her english isn’t very good, but she calls him vicchan and tells him to call her “kaa-san.” and after she’s tucked him in and kissed him on the forehead, viktor thinks he’s okay.

(hiroko has a lot of experience mending the hearts yuuri has unwittingly broken)

and while it’s not exactly what viktor planned, he and yuuri fall in love that summer. you know this story. viktor expected this.

what viktor didn’t expect is the love he receives from the rest of the katsukis.

on bad days when viktor can’t get out of bed, kaa-san will bring him miso soup and tou-san will coax him into the hot springs and mari will change his sheets and bring him fresh blankets.

and on nights where he doesn’t trust himself to be alone, and yuuri still shies from his touch, he’ll go lay on a tatami mat in one of the common areas, where one of the katsukis is always buzzing around. kaa-san will make him tea, or mari will quiz him on his japanese, or tou-san will teach him japanese drinking songs. or sometimes, when words catch in his throat and his hands shake, kaa-san will just stroke his hair, or tou-san will do books, or mari will have him fold towels.

it’s those nights, before yuuri has even let down their walls, that viktor knows coming to japan was the right choice.

it’s not just the katsukis. he isn’t Viktor Nikiforov here. no one in hasetsu knows that name, all they know is that yuuri is their pride and joy. the old woman at the grocery store calls him “yuuri’s foreign boyfriend.” the katsukis call him “vicchan.”

he really likes being vicchan.

at the turn of the new year, he walks on the beach hand in hand with his new fiancé while makkachin races around them. for the first time, viktor sees a whole life spreading out before him, filled with so much hope and love it leaves him breathless. he and yuuri are going to take the world by storm.

and at the end of it all, in thirty or forty years, he sees himself here again. walking on the beach at sunset with wrinkled hands clasped. in this little town by the sea that viktor loves, and it loves him back.

he puts Viktor Nikiforov to rest in the genkai sea, watches it sail out on the tide while his toes set root in the sand. yuuri’s head rests on his shoulder, heavy and real. viktor’s never had a home, or a family, or a love before. he’s not Viktor Nikiforov anymore.

“so this is it. this is love.”

he’s Viktor Katsuki.

[kinksharne]

I wanna hear the story abt your Spanish teacher!!!

yess!! ok this was in 2012-2013 so it’s been a while but i’ll tell you what i remember.

So it’s freshman year of high school. Spanish 2. My teacher was named Mrs. Veard and let’s just say it was an experience.

Mrs. Veard was like middle-aged and divorced with two children. She talked about her family and her personal life All the time. See every monday she would talk about her weekend in spanish as a sort of teaching exercise (but it was a beginner-level spanish class in rural wisconsin so there was lots of spanglish and hand-gestures but whatever). So she would talk a lot about her two daughters, one of whom had some sort of mental disability (i think maybe she was on the autism spectrum but i don’t remember). But Veard would always call her “special” or something similar (you guys all know the tone of voice i’m talking about too), which seemed pretty questionable to me but w/e.

On the weeks when her daughters were with her ex-husband, she would ALWAYS mention that to us. It would go something like “Mis hermanas *points to the pictures of them tacked above the whiteboard* son con Bill (i don’t remember her ex-husband’s actual name so this is what i’m calling him) y “Karen!” este sabado y domingo...” She would always say Karen in like this mocking, bitter way and it was so uncomfortable. I think she was trying to kind of make it a joke or whatever but it just made her seem bitter and desperate so we would all kind of half-laugh nervously. 

Most of her stories on those weeks were about men she would go on dates with and where she went with them. I think that was super uncomfortable for all of us because we were like 14 and didn’t want to hear about our teacher’s dating life, you know? But the weirdest part was that a while ago she had dated the uncle of one of the girls in my class. I’ll change her name slightly to protect her privacy (though i don’t know why i bother because as far as i know she’s still a proud meninist but that’s another story). So anyway every time she went on a date with a guy she would throw in a comment about how he compared to Dan Grant™. She always put a ton of emphasis on it. Or she would randomly go up to Hannah and squeeze her shoulder and be like, “So, Hannah, how’s Dan Grant™ doing?” And like Hannah was super uncomfortable with it but she was pretty shy so she never said anything. 

But that brings me to my next point. Veard was the most touchy-feely person i have EVER seen. She was constantly touching people’s hair, putting her arms around people, holding their hand, rubbing their shoulder, etc. It was weird. I vividly remember taking a test and raising my hand to ask a question and she came over and was like “Emelia!! What’s wrong??” and put her arm around me and rubbed my shoulder while looking at my test paper. And i’m like ... ma’am? i just had a question please chill. (Side note: idk if anyone else’s school did this but in mine we always had to pick a Spanish name to use in class to help us with like pronunciation or something. So my spanish name was Emelia that year).

 So she was really physically affectionate, but she was also a Mess. Like a lot of the time she was dressed completely inappropriately for teaching. My school didn’t have a super strict dress code for teachers, but it was supposed to be like business casual I think (or at least the majority of the other teachers dressed that way). But Veard just... did not do that. Either she would be in like sweatpants and slippers/crocs and a Packers jersey (and don’t get me wrong, tons of teachers wore Packers gear ON GAME DAYS, but Veard literally wore it whenever. And like we are super close to Green Bay but still) or she would wear like a fancy dress — but not “appropriate for teaching” fancy. And when she wore a dress she would often sit at her table at the front of the room and look through her notes or w/e and spread her legs apart so we could all see her underwear. So that was gross. Also, she would regularly do her makeup and/or curl her hair in the beginning of class, but also sometimes just randomly in the middle of class whenever she felt like it. 

And don’t get me started on prizes lol. So we would sometimes have like in-class games or worksheets or something and she would promise a prize to the winner. That was fine and a pretty good motivational strategy, especially for high schoolers, except she almost NEVER had anything prepared. One time she offered a student the rest of her (half-drunk and probably lukewarm) McDonalds coffee as a prize. She once gave me one (1) almond. I don’t even like almonds. Sure, sometimes she had like pencils or something, but most of the time she would just like scavenge around her desk to find something disposable. 

So all that stuff bothered us (probably the touching part the most) but we got to like the second-to-last month before shit went down. So one friday she comes into class and sits down on her table and tells us that she has a meeting with the principal after school. So of course we ask her why and she’s like “I’m not sure but I think it has something to do with how i’m so touchy-feely” (or something in that vein). She continued, “I guess someone complained to the principal about it or something...” And we’re all sitting there like “Ohh... that’s too bad Señora Veard...” but we were all secretly relieved that the issue was finally getting addressed. So then she starts crying and is like “Honestly I never meant any harm by it I just have so much love in my heart and i want to share it with my students... and i know that some kids just don’t get enough love or affection from their parents and it just breaks my heart so i try my best to give it to them here at school... but i guess i just go a little overboard sometimes...” 

And keep in mind she’s like sitting on top of a table staring at us and we’re all sitting in our desks watching her cry. so it was super awkward. And so she’s like “So that’s why i’m just so scared for this meeting etc. etc.” but she mentioned explicitly that she was definitely not going to get fired. All unprompted by the way I’m pretty sure. (Just a note: I do think that her physical affection came from a good place and she really was trying to help kids. She didn’t strike me as like a pedophile though I can’t speak for other kids, but nevertheless it was pretty uncomfortable).

The next monday we show up to class and we have a sub. We ask her where Veard is and she says she doesn’t know but she should be back the next day. But she isn’t. Sub says the same thing. Wednesday comes and the sub says Veard will definitely be back by next monday. Yet next monday she’s still gone. The sub tells us Veard is going to be gone for the next two weeks or so but she will 100% be back for the last 3 weeks of school to prep us for finals. 

2 weeks later and the Veard is not back. The sub, however, had to teach a summer school class and had to leave. So we got a sub for the sub. He promised us that Veard would definitely be here to administer finals but didn’t know where she was. Finals time rolls around and the other Spanish 2 teachers discover that our class is actually behind as fuck (probably because Veard talked about herself/wasted like half of class every day but whatever...) so they curved the final for us. Veard is still nowhere to be seen on finals day, and also the sub is sick so we had a different sub to give us the test. A sub for the sub for the sub for the teacher. It was a mess.

 And Veard never came back. By then word got around that she had been fired and there was even a rumor that she had tried to come into the school and gotten dragged out by security. I think that was a lie. But it is true that she hadn’t moved anything out of the classroom by the last day, even the pictures of her daughters tacked up on the whiteboard. 

So yeah, that’s pretty much it lol. At least I aced the final thanks to the curve though lmao.