#but like you dont SEE anyone wearing masks and idk

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

so im listening to the potd audio commentary and jodie's talking about covid restrictions and filming flux and how the restrictions were more intense at the start of filming (was that end of 2020/start of 2021?) and she says "by the time we finished, we could hug" and damn they took that opportunity didnt they

[badaseyebags]

hi hru?? ur amazingg

can i request a bada smut, when she comes back from dance class clingy and horny, but reader is cooking (idk, just doing something) and has to finish?

if u dont want/cant write this, its totally ok, dont feel bad and dont pressure yourself too much. love youuuu<333

but first.. dessert ⋆｡°✩ birthday cake

warnings: whiny/needy bada, she’s basically desperate, lots of making out, low-key cringe my apolocheese, it’s cute but it’s also not, bada herself.

word count: 1,5k

authors note: hi dear anon, first of all i would like to apologise for taking so so long to finish writing your request, and also hope you don’t mind me turning this into a birthday piece and not writing full on smut just yet! thank you for requesting, feel free to leave feedback (very appreciated) requests open <3

it’s currently 3 pm and bada’s class doesn’t end until 3:45, meaning she won’t be able to get home anywhere before 5pm. which means.. almost another hour or so of torture. the torture being her not being able to get her hands all over you as she would really wishes she could right now. all she has to do is distract herself for the time being before she can fulfil her wishes. simple enough, right? well it would be, if it wasn’t for the dizzying heat spreading trough out her whole body ..and for the naughty visions she created of you causing her to feel this way. if she could take you right now, right here in her studio, she would. no questions asked. no hesitation. she wouldn’t even care to shut the door, too impatient to get a feel, a taste, a touch, or anything she can. the way she would bend you over and watch you take her from behind and- okay, no. this was getting harder by minute. sometimes she’s thankful she wasn’t born a man, because she would have a “harder” time physically masking what you do to her almost 24/7.

the more she tried “distracting” herself, the more need she ended up feeling towards you. shaking her thoughts off, she continued showing off her dance skills, her movements becoming even more sensual than they usually tend to be. not that anyone minded, they were used to this by now. heck, they even appreciated it if they had to be honest. seeing her grind on the floor and smack the air was nothing out the norm, anyone would of thought she was just in her element. what they didn’t know was that she was imagining you under her the whole time, her cap covering her dark eyes that held nothing but lust at the moment. after what felt like long years it was finally time for her to leave. she didn’t even stay behind for a little talk session with her students as she usually does, politely excusing herself and dashing out the door. she was practically sprinting towards her car, hands gripping the steering wheel tightly, making her knuckles turn white. she had one priority right now and that’s all that mattered.

meanwhile you were in the kitchen trying to be a sweet good girlfriend for bada, preparing a little birthday surprise for her. not that the breakfast you prepared for her this morning and brought to bed wasn’t enough, or you feeding it to her as her grin grew wider. but you really wanted to surprise her when she comes back. she shouldn’t be home for at least 30 minutes or more like a hour that she usually spends chatting in her studio after her classes. it’s her birthday after all and you’re sure her students won’t let her go so quickly without wishing her all the best and more. you planned to dress up real pretty for her once you finish baking, and according to the clock you still had plenty of time. you were currently wearing nothing but one of bada’s oversized shirts that didn’t do much to cover your body, stopping just in the middle of your thigh, and a cute little apron on top to prevent it from getting dirty as you decorated the first batch of your strawberry vanilla cupcakes, the other still baking in the oven. you had this cute little idea of assembling the cupcakes in the shape of a full cake. it would save a lot of hassle cutting uneven cake slices, you thought. you sigh, sleepily wiping your forehead with the back of your whipped cream covered hand, given that you’ve started baking right after bada’s tall figure left the door just so you could get everything ready in time.

your soft humming to the beat of the song playing in the background was interrupted by an abrupt sound of keys jingling, followed by the handle being turned. you turned your head in surprise blinking in confusion, heart dropping to your feet. feeling a little embarrassed and caught off guard since you wanted all of this to be a surprise, well.. it would of been, if you’ve gotten the chance to finish it. you didn’t even get the chance to fully turn around to face her, to give her a proper greeting before she eloped you in a tight back hug, her large arms securely wrapping themselves around your waist. a place they almost belonged. you could feel her, smell her, and even hear her before you could see her.

“bada! is it 5 already?” you turn your head slightly to get a peek at her unusually out of breath self. she’s in very good shape it’s not likely seeing her so out of breath, unless she just finished dancing, or in this case ran to her to you faster. she just shakes her head, pressing a gentle kiss to your temple making your heart flutter. “no no baby, i just couldn’t wait to get home..” she buries her face in your neck, inhaling your scent giving you goosebumps, her voice dropping a little lower. your ears perk up as you suddenly notice her breathing much heavier then usual, her sweaty hands gripping onto your waist a little more possessively than you’re used to. you tried to keep your composure and continue decorating cupcakes, acting as if nothing was going on, but bada’s strange behaviour had your head spinning.

was she… in the mood or something? your suspicions further confirmed themselves as the innocent sniffing turned into rushed pecks to your neck, gradually transforming to soft nibbles and messy kisses. your movements came to a halt, eyes widening as you heard her whine against your skin. “please.. i need you so bad… i had to come home early because i couldn’t help myself.” your hands grip the piping bag out of instinct, causing some of it to spill on the counter and all over your hand. “you’re gonna let me have you right… you’re gonna let me take you… please baby say you will.” she growled into your ear, her hands slowly sliding down your hips and under the thin fabric covering your skin.

“bada i.. i have to finish this, it was supposed to be a surprise-“ you weakly mumble as you feel her large hands rub over the bare skin of your hips. “let me finish you first… you didn’t even wear panties? is that another surprise for me? please, let me have a taste..” she was practically begging at this point, her chest pressed tightly against your back. you couldn’t hold back anymore, turning around to face her was a huge mistake. seeing her in this state only made you weak in the knees. her wavy hair all messed up, sticky bangs pressed against her forehead. cheeks flushed, sweaty clothes sticking to her skin, chest rising up and down with her glossy eyes staring at you with pure desperation. you look up at her admiring her beauty as you cup her cheek, some of the whipped cream leaving a stain behind. she was quick to catch it, her tongue sticking out to lick the remains of the sugary cream as she held your hand against it, moaning softly as she closed her eyes. you’ve decided you had enough, you couldn’t even handle it anymore. with little effort you pulled her face to your level, catching her off guard. her hands fell on the counter behind you, successfully trapping you in the middle as you gave her the softest most gentle loving kiss and pulled away. she whines leaning into another kiss but you pull away again with a gentle giggle to tease her, just to rile her up more.

she huffs as she grips your hips, effortlessly lifting you up on the counter. one of her hands cups your jaw and the other rests on your thigh as she forces herself between them, crashing her lips against yours. this kiss being anything but gentle, unlike the previous one. your arms instinctively wrap around her neck to pull her in closer. she suddenly bites down on your bottom lip, making you shriek but all she does is shiver and kisses you harder, her lips sliding down your jaw and all the way to your neck, painting it in multiple hues of red and purple. you grip onto her hair, partly to make her slow down and partly because you wanted more. “bada slow down, what are you doing-” you lean your head back nonetheless giving her more access to your neck, skilled hand undoing the messy bow of your apron. “decorating my cake before i get to taste it.” she mumbles against your skin, nipping harder as she tosses the apron aside. her kisses trail up higher once again, her voice soon interrupted by the sound of the oven timer going off, her lips swallowing all and any protests before they could ever leave yours.

[minttsaltt]

So what kind of guy do you think joker is ? How do you view him personally. I don't really have much to say but one hc i have is that he's aromantic (see: my playthrough where I refused to date anyone)

jokers

below is the actual hcs for those interested

idk its hard to hc a "slient" protagonist without imposing your own personality onto them (imo) so a lot of my hcs are just how i play

1. his name is ren. ik thats canon but i see ppl use akira in a lot of things but when i think of him, his name is ren (i dont even know if this counts as a hc whatever)

2. some flavor of neurodivergent (autism imo) idk the themes of being misunderstood and proving urself of society is just so (also the black + white sense of justice) also on the nose the ability to wear different masks, different personas, is inherently autism coded

3. i think he is quiet and overly polite(trying to avoid being misunderstood again also is his seen a literal criminal)

4. adding on to 3, be may be quiet and polite does NOT mean he cant be, i like to think he is snarky and a jokester

as for romance ??? i guess my closest label would be aroace / bi? low romantic/sexual interest for sure, but idk if the label aroace is exactly right...

also i personally romanced makoto so of course i think they look cute together but any1 whose reading this u do u!! he looks cute with anyone (also there is cute shumako moments and i like them >_< a scene in wakaba fight and the school festival afterparty and the first time meeting futaba)

i am a makoto fangirl and it reflects on my hc of joker

omg and i think he and futaba have a sibling dynamic its just cuteeee little sister futaba

thats all can think of for now!! loolll

[antiquepearlss]

haiii hallooo helloooo heyeyeyeyy

jumping and waving at you

im gonna cook with some of these fall asks but ive been really busy with life this week(and being tired...) so this isnt my best ask ever

but your input will help if i ever decide to draw some halloween art of the tts cast(+hugo)(maybe)

what do u think the characters would wear on halloween, like to trick or treat(or wear for the vibes)

raps & eugene always match(sometimes if rapunzel can persuade her, cassie will match too), same w hugo and varian, but all of them dont go trick-or-treating, usually they stay home and give out candy or go to raps' party lol(or both depending on how theyre feelinh yk). when theyve done the trio, i cant stop thinking about cass, eugene, and raps beinh the mean girls trio... like regina, karen, and gretchen😭🙏 and hugo and varian have probably done nerdy ones(or, hear me out, seymore & audrey || from little shop of horrors)

catalina is a werewolf every year/j

frs, lance & the girls probably go as a big trio, or the girls do completely different costumes and lance just wears a funny halloween shirt(or dresses up as a character he likes), kiera has been a ninja turtle at least once(i feel like shed like tmnt idk...) and catalina was batman one year and everyone kept complementing her

this is not my best... but like please give me ideas bcuz i need to draw something for halloween with this group and i need opinions please im begging and pleadinh on my hands and knees

(while writinh that i tjought abt rapunzel & eugene beinh on of the couples from bridgerton and i think taht would be so cute what...)

Heyy hello hi im jumping back at you but then I trip over my ankles and fall.

(and shush I love your headcanons and asks)

Yes absolutely Rapunzel and Eugene always do cutesy couples costumes, and she makes them herself so they’re always high quality and perfect. She posts them on insta and everyone is jealous. (They absolutely did do Bridgerton one year and she looked like a goddess.) Maybe I’m just a big nerd, but I feel like they’d do a lot of historical couples costumes. They definitely did Hades and Persephone one year.

(They also did this)

I honestly can’t see Varian being the type to dress up unless he’s forced (by Rapunzel), same with Hugo. But sometimes they’ll do half-assed couples costumes if they go to Rapunzel’s party. It’s usually just a thrift store cosplay lmao. One year they did Gatsby and Daisy because the guy who plays Gatsby on Broadway sounds a lot like Varian for some reason…. Varian probably dressed up as a bunch of scientists barely anyone even knows of as a kid, though. (I feel like it would be really funny if New Dream and Varigo dressed as eachother one year hehe.)

Lance, I think he either just wears a Halloween t-shirt or he coordinates costumes with the girls, because I feel like they’d want to match sometimes. And if not, maybe he just puts on a fun mask. I feel like he goes all out for Raps’ parties though. He definitely has dressed as David Bowie on multiple separate occasions.

Cat absolutely went through a wolf phase. And did dress up as a wolf, a lot. Kiera dressed as a vampire one year to match her.

Cass doesn’t dress up unless she’s forced both mentally and physically. (She dressed up as Joan Of Arc for three straight Halloweens as a kid. And then Artemis for another three.)

[ganondoodle]

Not to add more fuel to the fire (I do) but seeing all your TotK rants and agreeing with every single part of them, I just remembered that as soon as the first Sages appeared on screen I immediately noticed that even their voice actors were the same as the Champions from BoTW but a bit "deeper" sounding and when I looked up they ARE.

I don't mind when voice actors make a come back for specific roles tbh but this time with how disappointed I was starting to feel about the game's story it felt super odd?? Like it did feel so much like they were reusing stuff ;;

honestly if anyone wants to rant about totk in my inbox feel free to do so, i might not always respond but its really good to hear others be similarly disappointed and maybe you are even pointing out something i havent thought about

(also its fine to not agree with everythign i say, just dont be a dick about xD)

you see ... now that you say that i remember seeing the leaks before the game came out that some of the voice actors from botw said they returned for totk and that was a topic of discussion .... which went nowhere also bc i guess they were too lazy (sorry, that word is way overused when people talk about games but ... well) to find anyone new for the few lines they say

that said it doesnt exactly help the case of ancient ancestor (that looks exactly the same as the modern people!! i cant stand that!! its my character design taste that is more annoyed than the lore nerd but its stilll ... they didnt do that either to differentiate the past thats OVER TEN THOUSAND years ago aaaaaaargh) that all say the same line only with a few words changed around or rephrased like someone badly copying your homework but trying to hide it- without telling you any new information at all that all have no personality, not even a different clothing style (its aaalllll sonau style now woooheeee) and dont even get to have faces bc they are hidden under a SONAU MASK AT ALL TIMES even when NOT FIGHTING (why are they even in their temples after rauru seals ganondorf ... no seriosuly what are they doing there, just standing around waiting for zelda to come beg them to swear yet another oath to some guy in the far future, theres no one in the bg either like idk, they could have been praying or sth- wait .... why are they still wearing the stupid mask and outfit .... raurus gone and minerus getting eaten by miasma i dont think anyone would care (i know its bc they dont want to make another model ... though removing the helmet at the very least ... no?) and then dont even get their own voice ... lol

(i didnt notice bc i played with japanese voices bc the german voice actor for gan sounded like german daruk and that was too weird for me ... i still expected him to say more than a few lines and some yells at that point .. hah ... )

[mollypollykinz]

Toshiro mention?

(Sorry I feel more comfortable on tumblr than I do comments for whatever reason lol)

I was racking my brain on who this could be thinking, it’s definitely an adult, and probably not an OC either, so what persona adults wear suits?

My first thought was Zenkichi but there was no way but then I remembered TOSHIRO!! It makes sense!! Toshiro mentioned that he liked Leblanc, his wet cat demeanor in his speaking was obvious, and he’s always wearing that suit, at least, from what we see. Add on that Toshiro’s a politician so OF COURSE Akechi would know him!

Sorry, I love him so I needed to confirm it. I haven’t read all the comments on the actual chapter yet so idk if anyone else has pointed it out yet

Still very suspicious of who the new black mask is…

And I love that so many people just know lmao, like, it’s a very open secret

ALSO! Minato coach!! Love to see it!! I love that Minato and Ryoji are just gay dads atp lol. Speaking of Minato, shout out to breaking Kamoshida’s nose for that! Even if his own leg got broken like in canon. At least it’s probably not as bad?

And Emiko!!! She finally knows!! Still holding onto that slight probably nonexistent hope of PT! Emi lol, though if she joined then Shiho probably would too. The PTs just keep picking up members!

Sorry I’m on a roll here lol so much to talk about!

Great chapter as always!!

(The image is just a snippet of the fic so I'm not gonna describe it cause you dont need it to understand the ask)

Thank you!! I can't answer the Toshiro question cause spoilers but I'm so glad you liked the chapter.

[lastoneout]

I do actually think part of the reason I've never brought up my palilalia to a doctor is because I got made fun of for it as a kid so I very quickly learned to mask it, and now it only really happens when I'm doing so many things I legit can't mask it because my brain is too busy to allocate energy to that task, and I cannot do it on command. It's also way less noticeable bcs I wear a N95 everywhere so people can't see my lips, which is the main give away that I'm doing it since the repetitions are so quiet you have to be right next to me to hear them.

But like...the other reason is cuz as I've learned more about it the more angry I am that I was forced to learn to mask it at all. Like so many resources are all about how to treat it and get it to stop, and tbh I don't want to treat it. It's just part of the way I talk, it's never been hurting anyone, it doesn't make me less competent or anything. But I learned to mask so well I don't even know how to unmask it, and I'm worried my doctors/therapists will just be like "well you learned to stop that's good" when it's like no!! I don't think it's good!! I dont like knowing that I was just being myself as a child and then got forced to stop because people thought I was weird!!

Idk I'm probably going to bring it up to my therapist next time I see her. Just to work through the like....mourning? I guess?? Or just the bad feelings around being forced to silence part of myself to be respected.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Random creepypasta character hcs VOL. 3(?)

Lost count on these but yeah I wanna drop more headcannons!!!

Nina is genderfluid and uses any pronouns! They also wear binders every now and then + they wear pride jewelry

Also they dye their hair like. A few shades lighter because he likes how the roots look when they grow out!! Same note they dye their own hair!!

I'm sorry for really focusing on nina but I've been flashing my design for her; but she also wears fake fangs

Before eyeless jack became eyeless, he has heterochromia! One eye was brown and the other was more gold!

Obligatory "I hc that ej and nina would be friends" but they do each others nails and would help each other put together outfits

A majority of eyeless Jack's shirts are band shirts

The neighborhood, TV girl, hollywood undead, mother mother, ICP, ect ect are a few of his favorites! Granted I think his wardrobe would become more limited since he lives in the woods alone in my au...

Still focusing on EJ, in my au before he got all.. monsterified... I feel like he was studying to be a doctor

Ironic and kinda messed up considering now he's forced to dissect people to sustain his own body but yeah

I'm pretty sure I said this before but I'll say it again since I love the concept; but Ben 99% of the time is bound to electronic devices. Basically meaning you'll rarely, if ever, see him drag himself out. Even when he does it takes a lot out of him, and he can only wander for so long until he has to go back

More au stuff but to help give jill her own unique vibe and stuff, I designed her to look like those old dolls you'd see way back then. You know the ones, with the porcelain faces and ragdoll-like bodies!! She still has her black and white clown look but yeah!! Due to this she also has visible tears and stitches on her; mainly on the limbs!! I also kinda wanna give her a sort of lolita dress look, if I ever draw her again! Give her loads of frills and stuff

Tying this all off since shes made to resemble a doll shes short 😔☝️ a moment of silence for lady

She can still stretch her limbs like jack, though

Though tbh idk if jill could do that or not <\3 but shh it's my au

Jane is much more... well idk the right wording, but I guess shes more masc presenting in my hc/au? She doesnt wear a dress or pair of heels like her canon look

I adore her canon look dont get me wrong, but I feel like considering that shes gunning for Jeff, that isnt too practical; esp considering jeff is.... something else

Basically wears stuff that's easier to run in, add some protection to her if she falls, swap the heels out with running shoes, no dangly accessories, ties her hair back. If not she'd definitely cut it down short

She still has her mask, though, but its a prosthetic she made/received herself since I dont think she'd want to touch the one jeff gave her

So yeah!!

Also I feel like, out of most the creepypastas, she has the best chance of living her own life in society; she only has intention to end game jeff, but asides that shes just. Mostly normal. Shes in therapy for her trauma, she has a job, she lives in her own place, ect

Oh that also reminds me! I keep rattling in about "my au" this, "my au" that, but I havent actually... released anything about it outside of headcannons

Idk if it'll be out in written fanfics, or as comics, or just one shot half au-accurate drawings or WHAT but

Basic run down of the au; time skip has taken place, havent decided a set amount of years, but it's been long enough that characters (that age) like jeff or jane are in their 20s (so like anywhere between 7-13ish years)

Slender still has his mansion, but it's hardly like anything the old fandom had,, it's no where near as huge or extravagant; its about as good as an abandoned mansion can be with little to no access to materials to upkeep it, and hardly anyone lives in it

Also same area ej lives, but they don't interact much and have a tense dynamic; both refuse to change locations

Still fleshing out the mansion idea!! So this is subject to change!!

Anywaus

Obviously characters who dont age/are ghosts/undead dont change ages; so like ben and sally are still the same, and the same applies to others like

Uuuuuh

Puppeteer, laughing jack and jill, slender and his brothers (this au does not include THAT one, fuck that one, we only have splendor and trender here), zalgo

Oh speaking of zalgo! He exists!! They don't really have a physical/tangible form though, hes more so a concept/untouchable entity that corrupts whatever it touches and causes chaos

Anyways

Also eyeless Jack's aging is... slowed; not by much but yeah!! Side effect of his curse and the whole "his body is changing into something horrific", and the slow age thing is a whole thing about the curse trying to extend his life span in order to cause more damage to himself and others

Real goofy stuff

Anyways

Laughing jack lives in his lil box and mostly transfers from person to person via the box being passed around

Be it garage sales or being sold in a goodwill, he eventually finds a new family to torment

No one suspects the old ass jack in the box!!!!

Ysah that's about it

Sits

Anyways yall should totally send me In requests (please read my pinned first!!)

[lev-eye-athan]

its ya boi back at it again at krispy kreme i mean with a saiki cosplay (i got called shrek in my teaser picture for this over on instagram)

(if u see my craft supplies in the one on the right no you dont)

the aesthetics for this one (ie phone flash) are heavily inspired by @el-costae 's saiki k cosplays (so sorry for the notif). they're very cool cosplays and he has cool art, u should go check him out!

more below :)

i might keep the mask thing for future fits rather than just pictures from my mouth down bc its a bit restricting and i dont like the way my mouth looks in a lot of pictures.

i had to leave my room in the middle of this cosplay and see People so the minute they laid eyes on me all i said was "i need you to do me a favor and not question what im wearing" and they didn't so i think that's a good sign.

^ i like these two a lot even tho i had to blur the backgrounds. yes, that is a pink and yellow slinkie in the left one. i just realized i maybe could have made me bigger in that one and avoided showing off so much bedroom but eh

now the meme ones (+ some implied kubosai for the soul)

if anyone has that neon sign brush feel free to put cat ears and whiskers on the last one.

disclaimer that some of the pics are edited to hide backgrounds etc etc (i also had to hide my natural hair and my eye in two of them and it's probably obvious if u look but whatever)

this was very fun i will be doing this again some time provided everyone enjoys :) might even paint my nails for the next one idk

[rafasbiscuits]

Thank u for the tag @schumi-nadal sorry it took me quite a few days to answer💀 love u bae <3

ARE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?: uhhh..no, not anyone that I know of.

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?: a few minutes ago because. School. Life. sigh.

DO YOU HAVE KIDS?: I do. 11 actually. They're this little furry gremlin baby devilspawns that likes to bite my fingers and meows for food like I starved them for 365 days.

WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY/HAVE YOU PLAYED?: I dont play sports right now but i am in a very badminton loving family so I can play for a few minutes tops in badminton, and because of my height (in my country is quite tall) i was told to play netball so. yeah.

DO YOU USE SARCASM?: nope. definitely not.

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?: uh...idk..probably anywhere on the face? like..their faces. If they're wearing a mask, or have big eyes. probably the face part.

WHAT'S YOUR EYE COLOUR?: dark brown

SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?: I love scary movies but I'm scared of scary movies...but I'm still going with scary movies. I like my endings sad and heart wrenching.

ANY TALENTS?: uh..no? Idk..I like to think that I can do art stuff but eh. maybe not.

WHERE WERE YOU BORN?: in this horrible small tiny country in the island of Borneo.

WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES?: writing, definitely. And drawing too.

DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS?: yep, cats. Used to have birds but not anymore. Also the huge monitor lizard in my backyard probably counts as a pet as well.

HOW TALL ARE YOU?: 160-161 ish

FAVOURITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL?: English, and now that I look back at it I really enjoy Art too. I miss Art.

DREAM JOB?: something with space stuff, like astronaut, aerospace engineer or theoretical physicist. But I suck at sciences and my life is ruined already so idk I just want a good paying job.

Too tired to tag anyone so if any of u sees this and wants to do it then feel free to do it. u can use my name as the proof that u were tagged I don't mind :))

[thestobingirlie]

hi! my feelings about r//nance is im just not into it, mostly bc i just Dont See it, like i just Don't, but also bc of reasons like ppl making the whole thing so Uncomplicated when it absolutely Would be Complicated as Fuck! and acting like it has any basis in canon, like i do like s//eddie, and ik some ppl do it for s//eddie too, but i personally don't think there's really any real basis for it in canon, i just think they'd be interesting (but that's another topic).

But also lowkey i think one of the main reasons i don't see it w/ r//nance, is that in s3 when nancy & robin interact for the first time, robin has The Biggest masking face ever, idk she just looks like she's autistic masking to hell & back, she looks like how i feel when im trying to be "a real person" all polite and friendly to someone i don't know, trying and hoping i remember all the things to say. idk it just Does Not vibe. lol

also when robin & nancy meet for the first time robin literally says "hi, I'm robin, i work with steve" isn't that at least a little bit of a sign that the first thing that connects them Is Steve, so like, idk, he might be relevant to them as characters??? like, a little, maybe???

hey!!

i will never understand taking a complex ship and diluting it down, because i love complicated relationships. like, within stranger things, steve, tommy and carol are one of the dynamics i find most interesting! because it’s complex. if you reduced any of those characters down to nothing, they aren’t even those characters anymore. they’re just wearing their faces. and obviously i don’t like r//nance, but if i did, i wouldn’t try to make it something it isn’t just so everyone involved can be perfectly happy.

and i think it’s so weird when they like, fight to the death to try and prove it has a basis in canon. like you said, i like steddie. i don’t think it would ever happen in a million years. one of my guilty pleasure ships in stranger things is steve and kali, which has no chance of happening, but a ship doesn’t have to be close to canon in order for me to enjoy, you know? and i can admit that, though i guess others can’t.

there does seem to be a growing trend where people treat fanon ships as though it’s morally wrong to ship them because they aren’t canon. so i guess maybe r//nancers are over correcting, and sprinting in the opposite direction to try and say that they can ship it, and fighting anyone that doesn’t ship it because they feel like they have to defend it, but it’s just like… people will always have different opinions. about everything, just live and let live. block people whose opinions you hate, block out tags to avoid posts etc.

and yeah, i totally get you, even in s4, robin just looks like she’s trying so hard to appease nancy and nothing is working. it just looks like the most awkward situation in existence.

that is honestly such a good point!! especially considering robin and nancy are in the same year at school, but until robin has a connection to steve, she wasn’t relevant to nancy at all. like, steve really is the glue between those two characters, and any attempt to remove him just doesn’t work

[ghost-of-the-machine]

just saw a button that says "im not myself today. maybe im you" SHUT UP....... dont remind me!!! theres a specific shame in it that no one seems to grasp, which makes sense, when do i ever explain it?

it feels so. shameful, even though i know i cant help it, even if its just my natural tendency, its like. i want to RISE ABOVE my disorder, but.. i cant. its a personality disorder, it defines my personality. having back to back personality/dissociative disorders is so fucked up man i do not know who i am!!!! my only worth of myself comes from what other people tell me. am i sweet? am i kind? am i funny? at surface level i believe it, thats how i seem to others so it must be true... but beneath that i detest it, i feel rotten to my core. it feels disingenuous since its coming from others instead of within, so i feel like im hiding something. like theres some part of me thats so indescribably ugly and vile, and i cant let anyone i love see it. even when theyve already seen it, i hide it further, i pretend like its not real. i forget long conversations full of understanding and love, i embrace the fact that i need to hide this thing, this monster. there is no monster!! its just me, and that makes it worse.

isnt it horrifiying, though? i take the voices of others, take their mannerisms, sometimes i even take their skin, i shape myself in someone elses image. realistically i know why, mimicry keeps you safe from rejection, people are less likely to throw you away if you act like them. you are more likely to be accepted into a group if you mask and mirror. you pick up on their vocabulary, their personalities, and you display it back to them. but theres more to it than that, i spend too much time abusing myself over things i cant control, in the hopes that itll fix me. its not like i do it just to endear myself, i do it because i like it. is that worse, then? i like when i copy, i like the way people are!! i wanna be like the people i like, is that bad? i cant tell, i see it from both sides. it makes me feel dirty. i really dont know who i am

am i still the angry boy i was in middle school? that was me right? maybe it wasnt me, maybe im new.. if im new then who am i? am i the me i draw? the me i project out to others? who would that even be?? it seems no matter what, i remain dissatisfied with how everyone sees me, like theyre not seeing ME... but how can i know what that should be if i dont know myself? its like its locked somewhere within myself, but ill never be able to open it up, never be able to wear the skin i was meant to wear. i think it has nothing to do with the usual suspects, nothing to do with gender dysphoria, social anxiety, no. my mind is made of barriers and walls, im hiding from myself. i want to see it, dont i deserve it? its me after all.

to other people i must be someone right? so why does it feel so wrong? its not me, its wrong! surely its wrong? idk man. it makes me tired, i remember a couple years ago i managed to completely convince myself that i existed in a box and the box wasnt real, the whole time i was completely dissociated from my body, imagining one of my self inserts instead, crying and panicking because i wanted to get out of the box it was. MESSY, but when i calmed down i realized i was so worked up cuz i didnt know myself

for years ive worn the clothes my family picked, i didnt even know i could change my hair, i thought it wasnt allowed. i didnt have any self expression whatsoever. i was a husk, a shell of a person. to the point where now when i buy a piece of clothing, or i do ANYTHING with my appearance, i feel this.. it feels like such a big deal to me, and no one else really cares cuz hello? yr supposed to do that i guess, but i was 18 years too late. i have no sense of self cuz ive never explored myself, i thought it was against the rules. i dont know why i thought that, but its fucked me up i guess. i feel lost, i feel aimless. and im sucked back into that familiar feeling, i feel empty

[wewfimapuppie]

idk if i am protecting myself in any way here. but this is my final log.

i am going to have to take the message at face value. i saw the wkrd frighgebed and scared and idk how he perceived what i was doing. i felt like fuck it yknow i might be wrong but this is how its going for me. i felt it was the best thing to do? idk i def said weird shit.

theres no way around it this time. i went manic. i lost my shit. i imagined all that. i scared him.

to me it felt so real dude. so real. it felt like crazg things were happening to me. and i dont have a good support system so idk haha. i hated taking pills. i felt so awful. so i just wanna rely on God for now. and therapy. i'll find a way.

i'll also lay low. wear a black face mask. sunglasses. black beanie. on my way to work and way out. no one will know its me. i'll change and wear a dif sweater and bring a dif jacket yknow i even wanna dye my tips orange like. i feel so embarrassed and i dont wanna see him or have amyone that knows see me. im hiding. im scared. im disappearing. i will just work, head to Tijuana, get uber eats on fridays and some white claws or adjacent when we get comfy. and we dont talk to anyone except maricruz and our coworkwers yknow. stay vigiliant. i rather you dont talk to anyone anymore. we can make friends some other way.

i rather we focus on paying off our debt. and we drop this. we are at a point where we are questioning a text he sent us. we cant do that......

i rather like i said, we lay low, no attention towards ourselves and we wear a mask and domt do shows we are an online act idk. i wanted to be like yahoo lets do shkws z and this happened instead? i went manic? so idk i need to just dont interact w ppl like natasha i look stupid and crazy i have no supplrt to tell me um this is mania.

i can still paint, i can still sell, i can still make music even. but i cant expand or be public in san diego nah nope. i dont ever wanna see him or anyone. this is embarrassssing dude.

lets jjst keep it simple. food. paint. youtube. spotify. cookies and weed. some alcohol. lets just chill yknow? like back to the status quo? but this time we start fresh i guess. but for rn i rather be alone lmao. i feel cringe.

hopefully i can just focus on the job and getting my life together. thats all i can do. ni modo yknow? what else can i do? stay stuck on this? lets just move on. and focus on keeping ourselves afloat. safe. we will be okay. i still want to pray.

the last thing i'll say though is idk why he said that he blocked me bc i sent him noods when

1. he hearted them

2. he djdnt blkck me

3. i blocked him that time

4. i didnt sent him noods this time?

also i specifically have not mentioned his name jjst ryan and my complaints are like... justified?

so my theories on that is...

1. that... wasnt him...

2. he is like.... a psychopath and it isnt even me!! to twist it. make me feel like i went crazy??

3. hes saying a lie to cover why he really blocked me and its i seem crazy.

its just weird he said 2 wrong things. that i ever falked shit abt him and that i sent nudes now kr that he bloxked me when i did it 3 years ago? like he has reason to say jt was fhe Gkd stuff....

he also just ignored anything i said. about the holy ghost stuff. he didnt talk about God at all. the message was like in broken english it was weird. maybe he was scared? but why say a lie ljke that? when i felt its either im crazy or im...on to something. .

and why did he unblock me at all? to warn me or settle it? its still weird to ignore my one accusation. bro. whats with the staring.

but idk its weird like its enough where theyd know what happened. the email. the calling. ryan. the other subtle ways of contact.

so idk i think he couldnt say its bc you seem crazy and he gave you that reason as to why he blocked you even if it doesnt make sense. eventually we're gonna have to accept this is his response. idk abt what he knows abt me and ryan but i know he knows that unsolicited nudes thing is whack bc be liked them and he never blocked me i blocked him... so wtf.

i hate that this wasnt to me, a proper response. like ok i was frightening shit. but wait ur saying u blocked me? nah u blocked me now. no njdes. so idk what to make of this response. to believe it? theres an incorrect factoid.... that isnt it. so shit what now? now that is what will drive me crazy is saying that shit when that didnt happen.

thags what makes me think maybe he was a... cooky guy. bc hes lying. hes manipulating the situation. he didnt explaim himself. just said i was scary and a lie.

idk what it is at this point. him. me? what are the next steps? well... i rather we pretend it didnt happen. im never contacting him or seeing him. im leaving him alone. i dont want to make it worse. i can find "normal" love like tanner. no celestial shit. just hey we fit.... i wish it was normal. i'll pray for it.

but we forget him Riv.... he's gone. whatever it is you thought... his response, whether you believe it or not, could be his real response. and theres signs that your perspective is skewed. and this is it.

i know the nudes thjng sticks out to you Riv. but what are you supposed to do with that suspicion? i cant go see him and be like "was that really you?" like shiiiit no. so now what?

that is why i wanna tell you this; i need to feed you and pay your debt so im getting u a job. but i will also tell you this; if its meant to be it will be. if that isnt him, the real him will appear. but if not, you have more to live for

so. we forget any of this ever happened. we are in incognito mode. we keep it chill. focus on your mental health.

start working. start forgetting. get good at hiding. keep it simple. we can walk away from this bruv. who says we need to acknlowledge this happened? im dropping thjs. even the lie. it could be a cover up to a harsher feeling. we was nice enough to wish me good health....

i will be w say sd and just surviving. this is my last zane log tbh. for my safety and wellbeing.

[weerewolf-mullets]

some of my friends go to shit that has 0 covid precautions and then they all get sick and go whhyyyyyy???? Like idk besties maybe cus y'all crammed urselves into a small house apartment during an ongoing airborne pandemic. but sure go get covid for the 3rd+ time for a fun sexy party.

Please I'm just ranting BC I have no where else to rant.

Or they go to markets or shows or anywhere and don't mask and then get upset that they're sick. Like idk maybe there's this rly fucking easy thing you can do called WEARING A MASK. Like I'll literally buy masks for them if they can't get any. It's just so fucking frustrating to see ppl I love risk their health for the dummest shit. Like u can go to these things and wear a mask. Ask to keep the windows open, bring ur own fucking HEPA filters, ask that everyone tests before they go, bring a box of masks with you to share. Or idk DONT GO IF U FEEL LIKE SHIT? There's so many things that can be done to mitigate the spread of possible sickness.

Like shit is so easy to fend off covid and other colds/flus and yet it's the hardest thing to get ppl to do.

I can't sit here and say all this without acknowledging that I haven't gone to dumb things but I try to take as many precautions as I can and limit the things I go to.

I'm just ranting BC I can't rly say shit to anyone of these people BC I don't want to get yelled at or told to fuck off. Not that I think these people would say things like that too me I just don't know how to bring it up w/o sounding like an asshole. Like I lost a potential new friendship awhile back bc they got sick and I asked if they wanted me to mail them some masks and test kits and they got mad at me for it. Said I was on my high horse bc I haven't had covid yet and I was rubbing it in there face. (Like I'm sure I haven't had it yet but I truely can't be sure if that) but I literally wasn't doing that I was just offering help. And there's been a few other times I've offered to send ppl masks or test kits and they get snippy. Like I'm just trying to fucking help u not spread ur fucking covid to others. If u can wear a mask you should be wearing a mask. Like I just flat out don't want to get sick with any cold, let alone covid and wearing a mask helps protect me from that. It's literally that simple.

[mbabol]

HOWWOW KNIGHT 3?

ok. ao. ive unlocked most of the map now. and i think im getting into endgame territory. based on the storyline and the op items im getting now.

uh. so i killed that first dreamer. so im just going to stick to the path and keep killing dreamers even though its making me really sad :( i just got to the top of watchers spire and. this one rlly hurt. at least spiders were scary. watchers is in the top of my fav city and theres a little telescope where u can see where she looked thru. and then you see her lying peacefully on the bed which is what freaked me out last time too. and to make matters worse they stuck one of the little scared guys up there to make you really feel like a monster bc its a reminder that some of them dont even want to fight you why are you fighting them? i think i was always destined to be the villain of this story

AND ON THAT NOTE. CONFIRMATION ON ALL THE LITTLE HINTS ABT HOW YOURE NOT EXACTLY THE GOOD GUY HERE. OR AT LEAST YOURE CAUSING A LOT OF PAIN IN THE MEANTIME. UH. DREAM NAIL. SO I GOT A CHARM THAT CHARGES DREAM NAIL FASTER. im like huh. what the hell is that for. all the things i use the dreamnail on are stationary? but im like oh of course! i need it to charge faster if i can use it on normal mobs. so i excitedly equip the charm to go see what cool tech this dream nail does on mobs.

the tech is psychological horror. i can now read everyones thoughts. hooray. so far ive had two results for mobs: 1) horrible pain 2) horrified confusion and immobility. cause. turns out. the coreopsis point. was actually. going to get answered. theyre. the orange eyes and aggressiveness is partially Planned. theyre all asleep. the sleep wasnt just the dreamers. its all the citizens of hollownest. to contain the infection they wove some sort of spell that put all infected in a pseudo slumber that repels anyone from trying to come in. theyre unwitting defenders of outsiders who may venture too deep and unknowingly spread the disease. either intentionally or by accident, theyre the perfect defense. agonized and aggressive because of it they lash out to anyone and keep curious wanderers away.

this was at least part of the sacrifice. i havent dream nailed everyone yet but i know thwts part of it. my next step is to dream nail the unnerving beast in the dusty underground area. the area with the pale king. who is the pale king? i donated at least. there were inscriptions that described a sacrifice. what sacrifice? there were corpses everywhere of bugs wearing robes id never seen before. what did they do? who is the white knight corpse that i cant stir with the dream nail? whats behind the door? they were instrumental to containing the plague. what did they do?

ALSO I BEGAN TO SUSPECT THE ORANGE DUST WASNT JUST INFECTION RUNNING WILD BC THE FIGHT I GOT STUCK ON IN THE SPIRE WAS SUSPICIOUS. THE ROLLY DEFENDERS? THEY WERE BEING SPECIFICALLY REANIMATED BY THE CLOUD OF ORANGE DUST ABOVE TO DEFEND THE DREAMER. THAT WAS SUSPICIOUS. THEY WERE BEING CONTROLLED, POSSESSED. THATS NOT JUST ILLNESS. THATS CONSCIOUSNESS AT PLAY

im feeling so guilty discovering the dream nail :((( even the littlest mobs have thoughts like "hungry....scared.....dark safe..." AND IT MAKES ME SAAAAAAAAD IM SORRYYYYYYY

ALL THE GHOSTIES WHO TRIED TO TELL ME FIGHTING AND GLORY ISNT WORTH IT WERE RIGHTTTTT

oh yeah i unlocked the spirit tomb or whatever a while ago. dope. theres just a bunch of random characters who tell u cool stuff abt themselves and someeeeee world building. dope

im also so op its so funny how i can still die. ive had to upgrade nail twice and i have a zillion masks. im also on the hunt to collect all the charms. i believe. i can do it

UH ALSO WHAT ARE THE SEALS FOR...? am i just supposed to sell these?? i thought i could use them for something eventually

er also idk where im supposed to get the skill i need to get into fog cavern. is it in the sewers ? i cant find it

UGH DREAM NAILING EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE SO SAD. RHE LITTLE MOSS GUYS IN GREENPATH WERE FUCKING DEFENDING THE PATH OF UNN. IM LOSING IT. IM THE BAD GUY

OH MY GOD ALSO I ACCIDENTALLY KILLED TWO GHOSTIES I THOUGHT I COHLD TALK TO THEM MORE WITH DREAM NAIL BUT THEY JUST TURNED INTO FUCKING ESSENCE???????

I FELT SOOOO BAAAAAAD I WANTED TO QUIT THE GAMEEEEE MY LITTLE GRAVEYARD BUDDY IM SO SORRY I DIDNT KNOW

ive unlocked some crazy zones also. why the hell was there a zone where i came from beginning of the game. howling wilds was it? howling cliffs? whatever. hey also im suspicious of all the unmapped areas that are high up. am i gonna get a skill to fucking fly straight up. why is the entirety of above dirttown unmapped. whats going on up there.

also i know theres something thats gonna explain what shades are but i wont lie thats not even on my radar rn im not gonna be able to guess it on my own theyre keeping it pretty well under wraps. i know im strange and i know im not the only one. the dreamers that first time kept talking abt how i "returned" and what i "wanted". so. yeah.

also my shade soul is literally an entry in the beastiary. so.

I FORGOR I UNLOCKED NEW MOVES. I NEVER REMEMBER TO USE THEM

i have fucking spin attack. i havent tried it once

uh also i made it to the roof of the world...? there was a pale ore there. snagged rhat

ive got some predictions abt whats gonna happen next. not wven predictions just potential guesses. 1) theres branching endings and im on badroute bc i killed dreamers OH YEAH WHY DID I SUCK THEM UP TOO? EW? WHY DID I EAT THEM. this is a sad ending ill just be sad and rhen immediately boot up for the good ending 2) im not yet on bad ending its not Great that i killed dreamers but it was all a fakeout to say sike ! u needed to break the stasis rhe kingdom was in bc this wasnt a sustainable solution. so the real decision comes later <- WISHFUL THINKING 3) this is the bad ending but also is there gonna be a twist where ghost and the soul are at odds ? no way right. thats too easy. maybe it is tho. hwy am i still gonna try to recapture the infection in myself that sucks 4) who the hell is the final boss. like i know ill fight the vessel but am i gonna have to fight my soul? the king? rhe queen? like what is up with that.

the random tidbits im learning abt npcs with dreamnail are ruining me. did u know map lady used to be a nail warrior like me. i do now. whimper. and shop fly has three kids. whimper

[cuervitodeisla]

A random tangent on collectivism and individualism

This is literally just my thoughts on something take it with a grain of salt. I'm no expert but would love to research these topics, especially on how they manifest back home.

I was raised with a somewhat collective cultural mindset, I don’t just care for myself but that same care and concerned is extended to the others around me no matter the setting. I’m aware of the web that extends far past my circle and myself. In contrast I grew up with media from the States, which is Individualist. Everything is about the individual and the individual is more important than the rest that happens to be there.

This clash of mentalities manifests in my person as:

“I’ll care for the communal and public spaces because others have the right to enjoy them as I have”

“I’ll wear a mask in the work space especially after I traveled because I don’t want my coworkers to get involved in My Risky Decisions to get in a plane”

and

“My room looks like a tornado but I fail to comprehend how that affects anyone, my space my mess my problem. Don’t look at it”

“my looks, dressing style and hair is my business I don’t care if it doesn’t fit into what the culture taught you to be feminine/attractive”

My mentality is still mostly collective until it comes to creative expression through the self and personal space, which are things that are inconsequential to the survival of the whole. The problem I have with collectivism is that its in fact cultural, so its informed by the rest of the cultural elements. In my own experience some of said elements are catholicism and evangelicals... you can see where this is going. Yes religion is an important aspect of culture and the collective and theres nothing wrong with that, the problem lies on the exclusion of many individuals. For example back home for a while the catholic church didn’t care much for people who practiced spiritism as an extension of catholicism, they weren't in agreement but they didnt exclude them from the community. On the other hand, the evangelical missionaries were the ones that actually fucked ppl over the most and started the fear mongering and exclusion of anyone different, but thats another tangent...

I guess this subject manifests in my artwork on how the collective culture treats ppl who diverge from it. They’ll still include you into their space and care for you. They make sure you don’t fall completely off the wagon, but it comes with a mentality of fixing you so you can fit into the collective, similar to an "re-abilitation" but there was nothing wrong in the first place. From my experience the fixing part was very intense until something happened and the family chilled out. Theres still some of it precent but is a lot more subtle.

That being said nothing beats having a community that cares for each other especially when you’re a neurodivergent mess who struggles with keeping up with things. Individualism in contrast shames you when asking for help or for depending in others to keep afloat. individualism is also heavily influenced by capitalist ideals, so I'm having a hard time telling when one starts and the other ends.

I personally don’t know if my experience is just a rural Puerto Rican thing. I dont know how collectivism manifests itself in other cultures especially other island cultures. it still stands that collective mentality is essential in to my rural folk, not only you’re in an island but even further away from most of the population, since they live in the coast. The roads that lead to these mountain towns are a VERY recent addition from a historical point of view so yeah collectivism and giving and receiving from the community was essential.

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Idk this tangent went all over the place but yeah its an interesting topic I guess? maybe next time I can go on about the people from the puerto rican country side "Jíbaros", and how they were an exploited agricultural working class, turned cultural icon for consumption, but at the same time mocked and their name became an insult.