#but like I didn’t have initial feelings for her. she had the crush on me and I decided to take the opportunity | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

wonysugar · 4 months ago

Text

don’t modify | jang wonyoung

♫⋆｡♪ ₊˚♬ ﾟ. everyone adores you (at least i do) — matt maltese

synopsis : everyone knew jang wonyoung had standards, but you were afraid you didn’t meet them like she initially expected you to.

pairing : stuco!wonyoung x gf!femreader

genre : smut, it’s kinda sweet i think

tags : wlw, hurt/comfort(?), fem!reader starts doubting herself, self-esteem issues, yn overthinks everythingg, YN YOU’RE GIRLFRIEND ENOUGH, <//3, couplez are very present haiii, i care them so much, jiwon is stewpid (affectionate), and rei lives for it, LESBIANS, worried gf wony, she loves yn guys, GUYS, now onto the sex, semi-public sex, so risky sex, ooouh scandalous, fingerfucking, making out, LOTS of it, kinda body worship, clit play

warnings : this fic contains self-esteem issues and lack of confidence, be warned :]

word count : 4,8k

a/n : heyyy… DON’T LOOK AT ME LIKE THATTT I’VE BEEN BUSY💔💔i’m trying to work on as many fics as i possibly can when i have free time, this is one of them<//3 i hope you like it, i personally don’t know to feel about it butfkdmfm yeah

i also kinda didn’t proofread this; it’s almost 2 am as i’m typing this out and i’m EXHAUSTED,,, if you see mistakes of any kind just please ignore,, for my sake

man, student council really was no joke.

sitting at the same table as your girlfriend, wonyoung, and her peers, you could feel the undeniable tension in the air.

this was originally gonna be a double date, but it very quickly turned into a last-minute student council meeting, for some unknown reason. you weren’t part of said council, therefore had no clue what the hell they were on about this entire time. all this talk about budget, organized events, it all made you dizzy. the only thing that was keeping you somewhat calm was wonyoung’s warm presence and the slow jazz music that was quietly playing from the vintage jukebox, the one sitting in a corner of the place.

you accompanied your girlfriend thinking this was going to be a cute opportunity to meet the two other girls! yknow, knowing that they seemed to be very close friends of your girlfriend’s, you figured it would’ve been nice to get to know them but it now just mostly feels like you infiltrated a top secret reunion that no one else could know about.

and the funny thing? you were already somewhat nervous to meet other student council members in the first place, and this wasn’t helping. now, it’s kind of embarrassing to admit, but the first time that you met your significant other… yeah, you were mostly intimidated by her beauty and maturity, but also by her status in the school. it’s almost like you felt bad about crushing on somebody as influential on campus, let alone eventually dating her. so, i guess you could say meeting anybody equally as important as her fellow stuco members was something that made you rather anxious; what if they thought of you as clumsy? dumb? or even worse, not good enough for their president, their best friend?

quickly interrupting your train of incredibly messy thought, the blonde girl, whose name you don’t quite remember, spoke up.

“nevermind any of that! we came here, on a week-end, with the intention to relax, to have fun and to finally take a breather from everything stressful that’s been going on in our lives, and what did we end up doing? talking about the school’s budget, like we always do. seriously guys?” she watched how the two other girls averted their eyes, clearly guilty.

she especially noticed how you seemed to be uncomfortably shifting in your seat whilst they were talking, so, giving you a subtle reassuring look, she added on.

“let’s leave it for when we’re at school and not in front of y/n, how’s that sound?”

the two other girls looked at each other, then you, and eventually nodded. just like that, the tension in the air disappeared, and you already felt calmer.

but not calm enough to be confident about meeting your girlfriend’s friends and actually enjoy this small get-together.

however, you couldn’t sit there and pretend that the silence that settled in between all of you wasn’t a comfortable one, especially with the way wonyoung’s hand rested on yours, it was a nice contrast to what was actively going on in your mind.

until it was brutally killed by the dramatic sigh that came from the familiar tall and bright haired girl’s mouth.

“well, i’m pretty damn hungry, aren’t you guys hungry? cause i sure am pretty fucking hungry!“

you internally laughed, acknowledging that she was naturally quite funny. you apparently weren’t the only one to think so, considering how that also earned a small giggle from the almost just as tall girl who you assumed was her girlfriend, since she was practically always looking at her with heart-shaped eyes, regardless of the situation; you could tell when a girl was whipped for another, and it was as clear as day.

she was more than whipped for the blondie.

“you know jiwon, if you wanted to get up and go order, you could’ve just said that.” she said, smiling at the girl in question and looking stupidly in love.

“well yeahh.. but it’s essential for everyone to know how famished i am at all times, darling; my hunger is everyone’s problem, i thought we knew this!” was what jiwon said back, her bright smile making the dimple on one of her red cheeks, her left one, even more prominent than usual, since it’s quite literally always visible. that earned a playful eye roll from the other girl as she continued giggling.

the pet name helped confirm your theory that those two were a thing.

“you guys want anything?” she softly asked, quickly making sure.

“nope! we’ll get something later, thank you rei.” was what wonyoung responded before warmly looking at you, slightly tilting her head in a way that silently asked you if you felt like ordering. you politely declined by shaking your head, hand waving around as you’re doing so, for extra insistence.

after that, they stood up together and proceeded to walk towards the counter to order. their hands were grazing each other’s for a little moment as they talked, almost hesitant. that is, before jiwon gently grabbed the other girl’ hand and intertwined their fingers together, both now having acquired their place in line. smiling to yourself, you also particularly noticed how jiwon, her face now completely red, seemed to trip on literal air as she walked with the reason for that was giggling endlessly.

man, what a match they were, you thought.

rei, if you remembered her name correctly, was soft spoken and careful with every little thing she said and did, her gentle tone offered some sort of contrast to jiwon’s, who on her part, was louder, more outgoing and spontaneous. being polar opposites, they complemented each other amazingly; from their behavior all the way down to their body language, it was impossible to miss how different yet similar they were.

it seemed as if wonyoung noticed you staring at them from a distance, so she assumed it would’ve been a good idea to give you a little bit of funny context. “can you believe they’re not dating yet?” she asked, looking at them with you.

“wait.. what? they aren’t?” you exclaimed, surprised at the almost unbelievable information your girlfriend just dropped on you. well there goes your theory, “are.. are you sure?”

amused, she shook her head, eyebrows raised, “mmhm.” she said, putting emphasis on the first m. “i swear at times it feels like i hear them gushing about the other way more than i see my own mom.”

you giggled, your eyes darted back and forth between her and the other girls, in disbelief. actually.. the more you looked at them, the more whatever wonyoung said seemed to be true; despite being this close and intimate with each other, there were signs of uncertainty, as if this was new for the both of them. like when jiwon seemed to avoid rei’s gaze whenever she spoke, or maybe even when rei seemed to blush at quite literally anything silly that came out of jiwon’s mouth, which was very often, by the way.

“crazy, i know.” she laughed, staring at the two with you. “i mean, they practically are by now, they’re just not aware of it themselves yet.”

okay yeah, you thought, nodding at your girlfriend, it made sense.

they did look like a newlywed couple if they didn't know they were married, and that just made it all the more endearing to see, honestly. you were glad wonyoung was friends with such kind-hearted and genuine girls.

that somehow contributed in bringing back that nerve-racking doubt you had ever since you stepped foot in here, however, and your amusement was once again quickly overshadowed by worry. see, those two seemed so happy with each other, despite not even dating, that it got you thinking about your and wonyoung’s relationship.

rei and jiwon sort of reminded you of what you and your girlfriend were, way back before you started dating, back when she knew absolutely nothing about you and was instead curious regarding your person, intrigued.

you thought that maybe you didn’t end up exceeding her expectations like she initially believed you would, that you maybe weren’t as interesting of a girlfriend than she would’ve hoped, that she could do so much better than you.

hell, maybe even the two friends you were staring at prior thought so.

you noticed how wonyoung stared at you with a focused expression, the one she always had on whilst she tried to comprehend something complex, whatever it was. many things elicited that reaction, sometimes it’d be an important yet contradictory school document, other times it’d be an attempt to read something that was written in one of the languages she’s not so familiar with, as rare as that was.

right now though, she was probably trying to read you, a language she thought she was perfectly fluent in, yet was always met with a hard time understanding completely.

then, upon realizing that you were staring back at her, her eyes widened ever-so slightly and she gave you a warm smile. doing your best in not letting your insecurities spill through the cracks of your face, you smiled in return, as to not potentially worry her.

“we’re backk!” announced jiwon in a sing-song tone, quickly catching both you and wonyoung off-guard as she obnoxiously placed her tray down on the table, almost dropping it. rei’s, on the other hand, was set gently on the wooden surface whilst she carefully sat down on the seat, smiling to herself upon staring at the delicious looking food, completely disregarding the conversation happening right beside her.

you nodded to yourself, that was truly respectable.

“already?..” asked the tall and brown haired girl in response, wearing a mischievous smirk girl at the blondie before continuing, “and here i thought that we were finally gonna have a break from you.” jokingly groaning and rolling her eyes.

“never gonna happen, unfortunately for you.” jiwon giggled at the banter, grabbing a handful of fries from the tray in front of her before forcefully shoving it into the other girl’s mouth, cutting the latter successfully.

that earned a giggle from everyone at the table, but rei’s tiny and polite laugh was especially noticeable among the bunch.

turns out she always listens when it’s about jiwon, huh.

—

“what about you, y/n?” asked jiwon, distracting you from the conversation you were about to engage in with the delicious burger that nestled in between your eager hands. you looked at her, allowing her to carry on, “are you volunteering anywhere?”

all of a sudden, all three different pairs of eyes were on you, and you only.

you cleared your throat, setting the hamburger down, now having caught a glimpse of what the conversation was actually about. volunteering, huh? is that a thing that student council casually members do when they’re bored..?

you didn’t want to seem like an asshole, but it’s not like you could afford to lie, either, especially not when wonyoung was staring at you so intently, like she was excited to merely hear you talk.

you felt guilty for even placing a word.

“oh uh,” you focused your eyes on the table, unsure of your response and the reaction you would get. “i would, but i barely have the time, unfortunately.. you know, with my job and all..”

“you know,” rei chimed in, shaking her medium-sized soda drink around before taking a sip, “you can say that you don’t care enough, we won’t judge.” she said in a joking manner, earning laughter from everyone at the table.

that was a joke, it’s obvious that everybody would be laughing.

“ahah, yeah..”

except you, of course, the best you could do at that moment was crack a slight smile since you were basically stuck inside of your own head by now, contemplating whether they were actually making fun of you in your face or if you were just overthinking everything again, just like you always do.

man, with each thought you had, you felt uneasy. the more they talked, the more overwhelmed you felt, especially if the conversation revolved around you; self-consciousness wouldn’t even begin to describe it, despite your desperate attempts to sit and actually enjoy the moment, as well as the food in front of you, for that matter.

but alas, that annoying voice in your head had won again. the same voice that always goes on and on about how every person around you thinks you aren’t enough, and that you’re uninteresting and unlikeable, sometimes just plain annoying.

that got the best of you today.

you reluctantly stood up, which caught the two girls’ attention, but especially wonyoung’s, all of their eyes perking up at you. “where you going?” asked jiwon.

“just the bathroom.” you replied almost immediately, “sorry, you guys can keep talking, i won’t be long.”

you make a beeline for the restroom after rambling out those words, not looking back for even a second. you push the door open once you get there, quickly closing it behind you before turning the sink on and looking at yourself in the mirror.

get it together, y/n, you told yourself, don’t embarrass her any more than you already have.

you proceeded to splash some cold water onto your face, taking advantage of the fact that you conveniently decided not to wear any makeup today. to call it refreshing would be an understatement, as it helped you gain back composure.

that’s when you heard, and noticed from your peripheral vision, the restroom door cracking open. you turned off the running sink in hurry and turned to the door, wiping the water off of your face with your palm and forearm.

“..you okay?”

“huh? yeah..”

she looked at you some more. it was clear that she did not believe you for one second, she therefore locked the door behind you, as to not have anybody interrupt. she was going to ask again, however, she refrained from doing so and let you speak of your own accord.

you quickly understood that she was going to ask again, however, refrained from doing so and let you speak of your own accord. you took a deep breath, then you allowed your vulnerability to manifest itself through your words, just this once.

“..i just feel like.. i don’t know—“ you tried finding the right words to say, but nothing could potentially make the situation any worse than you’ve made it, “are you happy with me, wonyoung?”

long pause. a very long pause.

she furrowed her eyebrows upwards, “…what?” her voice was now just above a whisper as she processed your words, slightly shaking. despite how subtle it was, you heard the fear in it. “o-of course i am, why wouldn’t i be?”

“i just feel… i feel like you deserve better than me.” you turned away from her, your eyes settling on the mirror before you, once again. “i’m sorry, i don’t wanna be annoying—“

“do i make you feel that way?” she asked almost immediately, cutting you off. her expression giving away her heavy dejection despite her best attempt to mask it. “do i make you feel like you’re not enough?”

hurting you is the last thing she would ever want to do, she’s certain she’d rather die a horrible death on the spot than cause you pain.

“no, of course not!” you responded just as fast, your gaze meeting hers as you turn to face her once again, “you’re great towards me, amazing, even. it’s… it’s just that, i’m scared that you’re doing it out of pure guilt.. is all—”

she, in response, was no longer taken aback. finally having understood what was on your mind throughout this whole outing, her worry evaporated from her face, leaving room for a sympathetic expression, “guilt?” she walked your way and stood beside you, her big hands now cupping your cheeks and holding them in a warm, loving embrace. “if i really was dating you out of guilt, would i really ask you to go out with me to meet my friends?”

“i don’t want you doubting my love for you ever again, okay?” she added, her eyebrows furrowed, now looking practically offended. “i mean, come on, let’s not forget that i have standards.”

interpreting your silence and the way you looked up at her as uncertainty, she continued, smiling at you, “and you exceed every single one; you’re amazing, y/n. you’re gorgeous, so incredibly smart, talented, understanding, so kind and genuine, too. the list could go on, honestly, but most important of all, i love you, i love you so much, and there is truly nothing in this world that’ll be able to change that.. i never, ever, wanna hear you say any of that again. also, never scare me like that? ever?”

“but—“

“nuh uh!” she hovered her index finger over your mouth, silencing you before you could protest, “no buts! you’re perfect and i’m very incredibly lucky to be with you, that’s final.” she insisted, before mumbling to herself, “also, i should probably tell rei to cut it down on the sarcastic jokes, shouldn’t i.. she gets comfortable way too easily—“

“no wony, i know she meant no harm. plus, i would’ve found it funny if i wasn’t so in my own head..”

she sighed, then nodded. and as corny as it was, that whole conversation was enough to fully reassure you again. you cracked a shy and content smile, to which she happily reciprocated whilst gently stroking your hair with her hand, leaving a loving kiss on your forehead. “i love you, wonyoung, i’m sorry.” you muttered, barely audible.

she groaned, having heard you, and rolled her eyes jokingly, “will you stop apologizing so much?” before smiling with nothing but love and admiration in her eyes, “i love you too dumbass, so much, and i’m afraid i’ll never stop.” she added, before leaving a small peck on your lips.

you returned the kiss, having wonyoung leaning into you and gently pushing you onto the sink. your hands went on both sides of her face and cupped her cheeks, your girlfriend melting into your touch with a smile immediately before pulling away and looking into your eyes.

now being in the right headspace and paying proper attention to her appearance, you just now noticed how good wonyoung really looked that day; her long brown hair perfectly straightened at the top and being more on the wavy side on the ends, the whole hairstyle being all, quite literally, tied together by a lavender-coloured ribbon. you’ve also noticed that she decided to wear her favorite navy blue and white striped knit sweater and tucked it under the waistband of her blue denim jeans, incredibly effective in drawing attention to her waist whilst also keeping a cozy look.

she looked beautiful, there was absolutely no doubt about that, but your mind kept wandering further. you thought about how much more beautiful she’d look wearing nothing, before being hit with the sad truth that the two of you are in a public bathroom, and that the latter was very unlikely to happen.

still though, you smiled to yourself as your eyes trained down on her body, getting lost in dirty thought before looking up at her again. once your gaze met wonyoung’s, you watched her lips form into a stupid smile before she spoke again, making you realize how dearly you missed listening to her honey-like voice despite having heard it roughly 30 seconds prior.

“and what are you looking at exactly?” she tilted her head slightly, flirtatiously sliding her hand up and down your sides as she awaited your answer.

it’s crazy how your girlfriend of several months could still manage to turn your stomach to literal mush, every single thing about her made you short-circuit; her mannerisms, the way she talked to you, the way she always put her hands on the right spot, her smile… she was clearly out to get you.

and it didn’t look like that was going to change anytime soon.

“..nothing,” you replied, taking a short pause as you took in all of her features, before adding on, “you look good, babe.”

that pet name made sense again, you felt like yourself again.

“yeah?” she spoke back, now placing her two hands atop each side of the sink that you were already leaning on. her face now mere inches away from yours, your nostrils suddenly invaded by the hypnotizing smell of the sugary, expensive perfume she had on, the one that drove you nuts, “thanks for noticing.”

it took one last dorky smile from her before you officially lost your shit and pulled her back in for a kiss, this one hungrier than the previous, and it didn’t take much for wonyoung to acknowledge the desire you felt for her, either. she’d also be lying if she said she didn’t want you just as much.

you could taste the cherry lip gloss she had put on previously as your lips danced in sync with hers,

“wait,” you said in between kisses, “what about the others?”

“oh don’t worry,” she chuckled, wearing a knowing expression and slightly shaking her head in amusement at the thought, “they’re definitely keeping each other distracted. i would even go as far as to say that they completely forgot about us even coming along in the first place.”

as insane as it may sound, you could totally picture jiwon completely discarding her food and endlessly rambling about quite literally the dumbest thing ever whilst rei admired her silently, listening to every word the other girl spoke, entranced as she took tiny sips of her drink, perhaps as an attempt to make the moment last forever.

the two of you giggled to yourselves, seemingly having thought of the exact same thing before the urge to have wonyoung ruin you in this very bathroom hit you once more, only harder this time.

it didn’t take long for your girlfriend to lean back into you, now making her painfully slow way down to your jaw, then to your neck, planting messy and lazy pecks across the skin. you felt her smiling against you with relish, taking in each and every soft noise that escaped from your mouth. her hands were growing more and more curious by the second, which caused them to explore and slide further down from the spot they initially settled on; your lower stomach and waist. they eventually worked their way up your black pleated skirt, teasing your entrance through the soft fabric of your already damp underwear.

that went on for a long while, so long so that you felt the pool in between your legs growing with each rub of the finger she gave you.

“god, look at you,” she then whispered against your neck, marking it up right to her liking, “perfect, always so perfect for me.” and watching you not-so-subtly grinding your hips against her hand at the words, longing for any sort of friction you could get.

“wonyoung–” you whined out quietly, using all of your willpower to not make too much noise so as to not let the other people in the restaurant hear you through the closed door. she heard you though, she heard you loud and clear and that was all that mattered to her. she pretended that she didn’t, however, and pulled away from your neck to properly look at you to raise a knowing eyebrow at you. the back and forth motion she was doing on your clothed pussy now much, much slower. “what was that baby?”

“please.” you breathed out shakily, “i need you.. bad.”

“do you now?” she responded, cocky.

you nodded almost immediately.

she let out a tsk sound in response, “couldn’t even wait ‘till we get home, huh?” that confirmation was all it took for her to finally push your panties to the side just enough to be able to spread your cunt and squeeze her fingers into it, which was very wet enough to welcome her digits, she slowly inserted them further in.

“so impatient, just for me, right?” she whispered, watching you as you nodded once again, this time more keen. she then paused, quietly taking in all of your reactions to her different words and teasing, more than satisfied, she scoffed, “fuck, i love you—“

she pressed her lips against yours again, eager; she truly couldn’t get enough of you, everything about you was all she could ever want. you couldn’t help but let a guttural groan escape from your lips in response to her two fingers fully sliding inside of you in one swift motion, filling your insides up perfectly. you were undeniably loud, but the kiss definitely contributed to quieting you down, muffling the noise of your pleasure, the squelching sounds of your pussy being the only audible thing occupying the air.

it didn’t take long before she started pumping her fingers in and out of you, finding a slow and steady pace before fully ravaging your core. she quickly pulled away to catch a glimpse of the scene happening on the lower side of things; her hand reaching into your skirt and working its magic. the sight of that worked the both of you up even more, and she would’ve completely gotten rid of every piece of the clothing that’s in her way to you right then and there,

but then again, this was a public bathroom.

and you two were very quickly reminded of that once you heard knocking at the locked door, as well as tussling of the doorknob. wonyoung and you froze, albeit a very polite pair of knocking and turning, it scared the shit out of you.

“y/n? wonyoung? are you guys okay in there?” you heard rei’s easily discernible voice on the other side of the door. your eyes darted between it and wonyoung, mere inches away from you (who also seemed visibly panicked, as well as amused.)

well wonyoung was incredibly wrong in assuming they forgot about you two.

in a silent, mutual agreement sealed by a nod, you came up with a pitiful excuse, fighting back every potential shake of your voice that could manifest itself, “y-yeah, uh, i’m just fixing up my makeup and—“

suddenly, you felt your girlfriend’s thumb pressing on your sensitive and swollen bundle of nerves without warning, and began to rub it in a slow and painful circular motion, wearing a slight smirk while doing so. your stomach immediately dropped at the feeling, and your first instinct was to bite your lip as you tried your hardest not to moan out wonyoung’s name out loud,

obviously, you wanted to, but couldn’t; especially not when rei’s on the other side, worried about you two.

the tall brunette threw you a teasing glance, her expression practically reading ‘go on, keep going.’ so, as a matter of principle, you did. you pulled on her knit sweater in overwhelm, oh so desperate to just cum already and not risk getting caught and definitely kicked out, just imagining that walk of shame gave you goosebumps, “w-wonyoung’s with m-me.”

“okay! oh and also, jiwon wanted me to ask if you were gonna finish your food.”

as bad as it was, your thoughts at that moment resembled ‘oh my god why isn’t she leaving yet’, especially when your love thought it was an amazing idea to casually fingerfuck you again, her fingers finding their familiar pace and curling against your g-spot perfectly. you kept tugging on her top, mouth slightly agape in surprise and overwhelming pleasure as you tried to come up with an answer.

“yes!” you cleared your throat after having that first word coming out a bit too excited for your liking, then continued, “yes, t-tell her she can have all of the remaining fries s-she wants.” you looked at wonyoung with hooded eyes right after slurring out those words, shaking your head in desperation. not at all in the right state of mind to even listen to her friend’s response who then thankfully left, you mouthed the words ‘i wanna cum so bad.’ to her.

she was gonna keep teasing you, but she decided that you’ve endured more than enough for that day. with her other hand, she settled her palm onto your mouth; she knew how loud you got when hitting climax. a few more pumps of her fingers into your puffy cunt was all it took for you to grip onto her sweater as you came all over her hand, eyes rolled back whilst you moaned and pleaded into her hand, bucking your hips into her and riding your high on her palm, her thumb still pressing your clit.

pulling her slander fingers out of you, she quickly made you taste how good you were and made sure you thoroughly and carefully licked every inch of it clean as you hazily muttered ‘i love you’s in between lick and sucks.

one thing was for sure, sitting back down at the table wearing underwear full of your slick was definitely an element of great embarrassment,

but at least you were now fully reassured that dating you was not at all one for wonyoung.

#smut #kpop gg #female reader #ive smut #jang wonyoung #jang wonyoung x female reader #jang wonyoung smut #jang wonyoung x reader #wonyoung smut #wonyoung ive smut #jang wonyoung ive smut #smut ive #wonyoung x female reader #wonyoung x reader

811 notes · View notes

robynhoodwrites · 1 month ago

Text

♛Within Reach♛

Expanding on the "Within Reach" Memoria, with smut at the end >:) (This is written from a first person point of view, with an AFAB and femme main character.)

Word Count: 6.5k

MINORS DNI! The following writing contains the following: smut, public sex, vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, blowjob, Evol used during sex, mirror sex, half plot/half smut, jealousy on Sylus' end, mutual pining, he is possessive (in the hot way, ofc), kinda rough sex.

My fingers run across the fabric of the dress, the silk material sliding beneath my fingertips gracefully. “This is from our spring collection. I don’t know if you saw, but a few celebrities wore dresses from that collection to the Linkon Gala when it first came out,” the saleswoman says, her smile a bit too wide not to be fake.

I nod, reveling in the wine-red color of the fabric. My hands skim along the sides until they reach a price tag hanging from the collar. When I notice the price, a grimace spreads across my face. I hang the dress back up on the wall, a sigh leaving my frowning lips. The saleswoman notices this, tutting lightly under her breath.

“On second thought, why don’t you just browse over here in the clearance section while I finish stocking over here,” she says, her wide grin not leaving her face. Ouch. I just nod in response as she prances away, my eyes skimming the racks in the clearance section. Even these are a bit too expensive…

The pressure is on for this shopping trip. I have to make sure I look good for Romero’s party, especially considering that Sylus is going to be accompanying me. I didn’t technically invite him, but he took the initiative and invited himself. Honestly, I’m kind of glad he did. I can be a bit bad at that stuff sometimes.

As if thinking about Sylus had summoned him, I hear a crow’s caw come from my pocket. I take it out to find that Sylus is calling me, his face now illuminating my screen. Asshole must have changed my ringtone. I press the answer button, my mood brightening involuntarily as I place the phone against my ear.

“Did you change my ringtone?” I ask, a smile flitting across my face. I hear a dark chuckle from the other end, and I feel the butterflies in my stomach start to flutter rampantly. I have got to get this crush under control.

“I thought this one was so much more interesting. Now you’ll think of me no matter who calls,” he drawls, and I can hear the grin in his voice. God damn it, he’s not even here and I’m blushing. “Listen, I’m at the boutique by your work, on the top floor.”

I feel like my heart has stopped. “Wait, you’re here too? Did you do that on purpose?” I ask, a slight panic lining my voice. Sylus seems to pick up on this, another chuckle emanating from my phone’s speaker. “You totally did this on purpose,” I whine.

“See you in ten minutes, sweetie,” he insists, before hanging up and leaving me with a shiver down my spine. That asshole.

✧༺♛༻✧༺♛༻✧༺♛

The elevator finally slows to a stop, the door opening with a ding to reveal the top floor. I enter a waiting room of sorts, with a white and impeccably shiny tiled floor and several plush couches lining the walls. The room is empty save for two men, who are lounging on the sofas like they own the place.

“Luke, Kieran! Those couches are white! Get your feet off of them before you cover them in soot,” I nag, waving my hands in an annoying motion to get them to sit up properly. “The poor cleaners… Who knows where you two have been.”

“Oh, look. Mom’s here,” Luke jokes, and I turn to him with a fake frown on my face. He puts up his hands defensively, finally sitting up normally in his chair. Despite the mask, I can tell that a grin is spread across his face.

“I’m only a year older than you, asshole,” I mutter, crossing my arms in front of my chest. I flip him off, which only coaxes a giggle out of Luke. I shake my head at him, trying to fight the smile threatening to ruin my composure.

“If you keep it up, Luke, then I’m gonna take over as mom's favorite,” Kieran jokes back. I turn to him, reaching a hand down and rubbing it against his hair in an affectionate manner.

“You sure are buddy,” I say, leaning into the whole “mom” thing with a sigh. These two are idiots, but they’re so sweet that I can’t help but love them.

“Careful, you two. Sylus might rip you a new one if he sees you guys near each other,” Luke teases, and my hand immediately leaves Kieran’s hair. Besides Jenna, who has been on the receiving end of my ranting many times, these two are the only ones to know about how I feel towards Sylus. I didn’t actually tell them, but they have made it very apparent that they have figured it out.

“That’s it. Neither of you are my favorite anymore. Mephisto is in 1st place,” I mutter, moving towards the door at the end of the hall.

“Nice job, Luke. Now we’re losing to a fucking crow,” Kieran whines. Luke just throws a joking glare at him, resuming his lounging on the couch as he browses one of the many magazines on the table in front of him.

I just chuckle lightly beneath my breath before opening the door in front of me and closing it behind me with a click. The room I enter is quite large, with several changing rooms lining the walls. There is a table covered in different fabrics, several of them glittering under the fluorescent light above me. My eyes finally land on Sylus, who is standing in front of a large, floor-length mirror in the center of the room.

“Long time, no see,” he announces, his eyes meeting mine in the mirror. He smiles, and my heart begins its palpitations again.

“It really hasn’t been that long,” I mutter, slowly walking closer to him as I take the room in.

“And yet why does it feel like an eternity? Does time fly when you’re around?” he asks, turning to face me finally. Shit. He has to know what he’s doing. A blush creeps onto my cheeks, and there is no way Sylus hasn’t noticed.

I don’t know what to say, simply standing there and staring at him like a statue. He doesn’t break eye contact, instead holding up two ties. He holds a solid red tie in one hand, the other clutching a light blue striped tie. “Which one?” he asks, holding each up to his neck in turn.

I walk up to him, barely thinking before wrapping the red one around his neck. My fingers work slowly, tying it in an intricate knot and pulling it tight around his neck. His gaze never leaves my face, his eyes burning holes in my skin. I can’t bring myself to look at him, knowing that one glance at him will surely bring me to a puddle beneath his feet.

I fiddle with the silk material of the tie, finally working up the courage to meet his gaze. “The red. It matches your eyes,” I mutter, before stepping back and distracting myself with the table of assorted fabrics. He chuckles, following me closely and examining some of the fabrics himself.

“I’ll have to pick a suit to match the tie, then. Wouldn’t want me to take you to that party with a mismatched outfit, now would we?” he asks, his fingers finding a black fabric and rubbing his thumb over it lightly.

“This is for Romero’s party?” I ask, stunned at the idea that he is buying an entirely new outfit just for me. No, not just for me. For the party. Don’t be delusional. He nods, taking the fabric and setting it aside.

“I wouldn’t want you to attend the party with me when I’m not looking my best. Not that I don’t always look my best, I just don’t want to take any chances,” he teases, setting the fabric on an empty table beside him. He takes off the tie, resting it neatly next to the fabric.

“Where’s all the staff? I figured you would have someone helping you pick things out,” I ask, my eyes scanning the empty boutique for any other signs of life.

“I sent everyone away. I don’t like to be bothered, and they do what I say since I’m a VIP. They should be sending in a tailor to take my measurements, though,” he boasts, never afraid to flex his wealth in front of me. He’s such an asshole. I want him so bad.

“Sylus, how did you know I would be here?” I ask, picking up a nearby object to fiddle with. If I don’t do something with my hands, the nervousness will show on my face. And I cannot have him knowing how nervous he makes me.

“I have Mephisto watch the entrance of every building I’m in, in case of an ambush. He spotted you when you walked in and came squawking to me immediately, the loyal bird,” he smiles, running a hand through his silvery hair. So, I have Mephisto to blame for this.

“I asked for the tailor 30 minutes ago, and he’s still a no-show. What kind of store treats its VIP guests this way?” he huffs, clearly growing impatient.

“How dare they? Don’t they know who you are?” I tease, finding any excuse I can to make fun of the spoiled brat in front of me. He gives me a dark look, making me stop in my tracks. My fidgeting stops, and he looks down at the item in my hands.

“Oh, perfect. Glad to see we have a volunteer to tailor me today,” he grins, and I look down to see that the item I was fiddling with was, in fact, measuring tape. Shit, how am I this stupid?

“But I don’t know how to tailor-” I begin, but he interrupts me by grabbing the tape from my hands and wrapping it around his bicep.

“You just measure the different sizes of my body, see? Anyone can do it,” he explains, taking the tape off of his bicep and showing me the measurement. I try to stay calm and collected on the outside, but on the inside, I am screaming. “See, I’ve already got one measurement done for you,” he says, a smirk playing across his lips.

“How generous,” I mutter, snatching the measuring tape from his hands. I sigh, looking from the tape to his sturdy form in front of me. I can do this.

“C’mon. It’ll save time,” Sylus insists, and I see a small glimmer of amusement in his eyes.

“Fine. If you insist, your outfit will be made according to the measurements I take. And no matter how it turns out, you have to wear it to the party. Deal?” I ask, hoping that this will scare him off. If I have to get up close and measure him, I might melt.

He chuckles, stretching out a hand to shake mine. “Deal,” he says, wrapping the hand around mine and giving it a gentle shake. He rifles through a drawer in the table next to him, producing a pen and paper from inside. “You can write the measurements in here. You’ll need my waist and chest for the shirt, and I have already done the arms for you. Then, for pants, you need my inseam, the outside length, and the thigh. Oh, and my ass,” he adds with a wink, only strengthening the redness in my face.

“God, you’re so lucky I’m such a good…” I freeze, struggling to find the word. “Friend,” I finish, trying to pull myself together. A flicker of something flits across his face, but I can’t tell exactly what. He hands me the pen and paper, leading me over to the mirror.

“Let’s start with the chest, then,” he offers, pulling his shirt up to reveal his sculpted abdomen. He doesn’t take his shirt all the way off, instead letting it rest just above his pecs.

I can't help it- I start to stare. It takes all of my strength not to rub my hands along his torso, the defined abs rippling along his stomach calling to me like a siren song. This isn't the first time I've seen him shirtless, but it will be the first time I've ever gotten this close.

"Like what you see?" He asks, and my attention snaps back up to him. Shit, how long was I staring? I clear my throat, walking closer to him and resting the pen and paper on a nearby chair.

"Just... trying to decide where to start," I mumble, trying my hardest to brush past my obviousness. He chuckles but doesn't say anything else. There's no way that worked.

With my hands now free of everything but the measuring tape, I begin assessing his body for real this time. "I think I'll start at the chest," I tell him. That way, you can put your shirt down faster. And I can stop feeling like I'm going to explode.

"Whenever you're ready," he practically purrs, looking down at me expectedly. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding, inching closer to him as I hold up the measuring tape. I try my best not to touch him, my hands struggling to reach around his torso.

"Don't be nervous. The closer you are, the more accurate," he tells me, placing a hand on the small of my back and pushing me closer to him. Calm down. The quicker you do this, the sooner it's over.

But what if I don't want it to be over?

I exhale, finally working up the courage to get closer to him. My hands wrap around his torso, his warm skin burning against my bare arms. I thread the tape around his back, coming forward to meet me in the front.

My fingers graze his skin lightly, and I hear him inhale sharply. I panic, looking up at him for the first time since I started measuring him. There is a look in his eyes that I have never seen from him before, and I'm unable to place exactly what emotion it is.

"Sorry," I mumble, worried I've upset him. I take the tape off and go to write the measurement down in the notebook.

"No, it's just... your hands are so cold," he mutters, his hands brushing where mine had just touched him. A smile graces his face, which makes me pause. Is he... enjoying this?

I shake my head, clearing my thoughts. He's just messing with me. I move back over to where he is standing, my hands a bit more steady as I go to measure his waist. If he wants to mess with me, then I'll mess with him back.

I don't shy away from touching him now, my hands grazing along the sides of his hips as I thread the tape around his back once again. I watch as goosebumps rise on his skin, the hairs on his arms standing up ever so slightly.

I take the measurement, turning away to write it down in my book once again. I don't look at him, afraid that his gaze will take away the newfound confidence I've gained. Now, to move lower.

I get down on my knees in front of him, gulping slightly as I measure the circumference of his lower half. This time, I make sure not to touch him, my hands hovering slightly as they move around his backside. It's a shame. His ass is one of his best assets.

When I've taken that measurement, I move to the outside of his legs. Luckily, his tight jeans act as a barrier between me and his skin. That makes me feel a bit better about touching him, actually.

Finally, I move to the inseam. I start at his ankle, moving the tape up slowly along the length of his leg. When I finally look up, I realize how close my hand is getting to his crotch. I freeze for a moment, my face turning red.

"The closer you are, the more accurate." The memory of his words from earlier rings in my ear. I sigh, moving as high up as I can without straight up fondling him. My eyes finally rake up towards where the tape ends, his crotch directly in front of my face.

Is he hard right now, or is it just always straining against his jeans? No, stop. Friends don't think that way about friends. I take away the tape, hurriedly standing up and writing down the final measurement in my notebook.

I still cannot bring myself to make eye contact with him, the deep embarrassment leaving splotches of red along my face. "Okay, w-well, now we can get back to looking at fabrics," I say, trying to hide the embarrassment in my voice as I move to turn away from him.

He stops me, his hand gripping my wrist tightly. I drop the notebook in surprise, and he takes that moment to tilt my face up to look at him for the first time since I started measuring him.

"Wait," he begins, seeming to be searching for the right words. "We’re attending the party together. Our outfits should match," He tells me, his eyes still staring down at me with that same mystery twinkle in them.

"Well, I figure I can just pick out a red dress or something," I mumble, my head still resting in his hand. He tuts, releasing me to pick up the notebook and tape I dropped on the ground.

"No, we need to fully match. That way, no one will question who your date is for the night." He places the notebook carefully down on the chair, twirling the measuring tape intricately between his fingers.

"Oh," I nearly whisper, finally catching on to what he's implying. "I can't really afford to get something specially made... I'll just get one of the premade dresses."

"It's my treat, since I invited myself to this party," he smiles, giving me a look that screams "You don't have a choice in the matter." I nod, lost for words as he raises one of my arms. I gulp, the short sleeves of my dress making skin touch skin as his fingers run lightly up my arms.

He works painfully slow, his fingers tracing along my skin and leaving goosebumps in his wake. I can't help the shudder that racks my body, which makes a small smirk play across Sylus' face.

I start to feel a small pool begin beneath my legs, and I have to bite my lip to keep from cursing myself out. Damn it, pull yourself together. He moves to my chest, his fingers not touching my breasts but getting so close that one slip would put his hand against me.

I hold my breath, and the prick keeps moving as painfully slow as he has been the entire time. "God, you're so slow with the measuring tape. I was nearly done by now when I was doing it," I mutter, and his eyes flick up to meet mine.

"I'm just trying to be precise, sweetie," he breathes, looking back down to get the measurement of my chest. He finally releases the measuring tape, an anxious breath quickly leaving my lungs as he moves to write down the data.

I shake my head again, trying to snap myself out of whatever trance he has put me in. The heat is still pooling beneath my legs, a blush spreading across my cheeks. Does he know what he's doing, or is he just an oblivious guy trying to be nice?

He resumes his work, wrapping the tape around my waist and jotting down the numbers. It is then that he gets on his knees, looking up at me from the ground with that same twinkle in his eyes.

It takes all my energy not to squeak from panic. Him on his knees in front of me... I stare down at him, the pool beneath my legs more akin to a river.

"I have to do your inseam now. You're wearing a dress, so I need your permission to put my hands under it."

My eyes widen, my breath halting yet again. The more embarrassed side of me is begging for me to stop him, but the rest of me is practically screaming for him to continue.

"Go ahead," I nearly whisper, and I flinch as his hand touches my skin yet again. He starts at my ankle, running the tape along the inside of my leg agonizingly slow. His fingers lightly drag along my skin, and a breath hitches in my throat.

"You're doing great," he murmurs, and my heart skips a beat in my chest. His hand finally reaches my knees, which is where my dress ends. He slides his hand under it, moving upwards towards my thighs.

I'm suddenly aware of the heat radiating off of my body, the warmth pooling between my legs, and his fingers moving further up into my dress. If you had told me earlier that this is where I would end up, I would've laughed in your face.

He finally reaches the top of my thigh, his thumb pressing down roughly on the tape.

And directly into the pool of my desire that has started to soak through my underwear.

His breath hitches in his throat, his eyes closing as he lets out a curse under his breath. I'm almost frozen in shock, my world seeming to crash down around me. He knows.

"I'm so sorry, I don't know what-" I begin, but he grips my thigh with his hands, and the words die in my throat. His eyes flutter open, locking with mine in the mirror next to us.

"Is this all for me?" He asks, and I feel my heart start to pound out of my chest. What the fuck does that mean, Sylus?

"No. Yes. I'm so sorry, I don't know what's gotten into me," I begin, anxiety bubbling in my stomach. "It's just a crush, and I'll get over it, I promise. I know you don't feel that way-"

"Are you dense?" He asks, his grip loosening on my thigh ever so slightly.

"Excuse me?" I ask, looking down at him in shock.

"Have you not noticed the way I look at you? Have you not, for one second, thought about why I would invite myself to a birthday party for someone I have never met?"

I just shake my head, trying and failing to wrap my head around everything that is happening.

"It's because I cannot bear to sit alone at home while you go to that party. The idea of you all dolled up for another man? The thought of you smiling at him, laughing at his jokes..." he trails off, but the look in his eyes is distant. His grip tightens on my thigh yet again, this time from a desperate need.

"How long have you felt this way?" I ask, whispering as I look down at his face.

"Since the beginning. There is not one moment that I have not spent thinking about you, not one night that I have not been lying awake and picturing you. Your touch, your smell, how you must taste," he murmurs, his thumb tracing circles on my upper thigh, my excitement now coating his finger.

I can't help the moan that escapes from me, my legs feeling weak as he continues rubbing rough circles on my thigh. I finally recognize the twinkle of emotion that has been dotting his eyes.

It's hunger.

"I've felt e-exactly the same," I manage to squeak out. "God, I feel so s-stupid-" I begin, but he cuts me off with a rough grab of my thigh.

"Don't you dare. You're not stupid, just careful. That's one of the reasons I feel so strongly about you," he murmurs, looking up at me with a frown. The sparkle in his eyes is now a fire, threatening to burn me to ashes with just a look.

"You're perfect," he purrs, his thumb leaving from under my dress and entering his mouth. I fall to my knees in front of him, feeling weak as I watch him feast on my excitement.

"Do you know how long I've wanted to do this? To taste you?" He asks, his thumb finally leaving his mouth. I curse under my breath, taking his head in my hands.

I pull him towards me, our lips meeting in a fiery clash after months of anticipation. He lifts me onto his lap, my legs straddling him as I run my fingers through his silvery hair. I moan, and he takes the opportunity to bite my bottom lip.

He moves a hand to my waist, the other finding its way to the back of my head as he grips my hair. I groan, pushing him backward until he is lying on the shag carpet below us. I'm straddling his body now, lying on top of him and rubbing my hands under his shirt to feel his toned torso.

"Is it how you thought it would feel?" He asks, breaking the kiss to look up at me. I'm sure I look a mess, with swollen lips and ruined hair. But he looks at me like I'm the only person alive that he wants to be with.

"Better," I tell him, my lips finding his again. He wraps his arms around me, pulling me closer to him as he slips his tongue into my mouth, exploring it like it would be the last time he ever would.

He grinds himself against me, his erection fighting against his tight jeans as it rubs into my pussy. I let out another moan, breaking the kiss, as I try to stifle the noise by biting his shirt.

"Stop that," he murmurs, pulling his shirt out of my mouth. "I want to hear you."

"We're in public, Sylus. What if another shopper comes in?" I ask, still fighting moans as he continues to grind himself against me.

"I rented the floor for the next hour. No one should be anywhere near us," he murmurs, moving his hands under my dress. I grab his hands, pinning them on the floor next to his head.

"Shouldn't we just go home?" I ask, and he smirks up at me. I feel something moving beneath my dress and look to see that he is using his tendrils of black smoke. They curl around my thighs, sparking pleasure through my body.

"I need you now," he nearly growls, his Evol pulling down my underwear in one fell swoop. I gasp in shock, and he uses my moment of weakness to flip us over. His hands are planted firmly on the ground beside my head, using his Evol to lift the bottom of my dress and expose my naked lower half.

The chill of the air conditioning blows across my exposed cunt, a shiver crawling up my spine in anticipation. Sylus moves one of his hands down to my thighs, dragging his fingers up and down lightly like he did before.

"Sylus, please," I moan, and he smiles devilishly down at me. His fingers finally make it up to my entrance, teasing me slowly by dragging them around the folds. I moan yet again, out of both pleasure and frustration.

He finally reaches the bundle of nerves at the top of my heat, circling his thumb around it slowly. My back arches, attempting to push myself even closer to him. He pulls away, tutting under his breath.

"Patience isn't your strong suit, is it?" He asks, his warm breath dancing along my face.

"I have been patient for months. I can't be patient anymore," I whine, moving a hand down to grasp his. I move his hand back to my clit, and he chuckles deeply as he resumes his ministrations.

I moan as he begins to rub faster, my back arching upwards involuntarily. His mouth finds my neck, kissing and sucking along the outside with care. He finally reaches his desired spot, nibbling on it lightly before sucking roughly on it and leaving his mark.

He moves his hand from my clit, and I almost begin to complain before something else replaces it. His smoke is now curling around it, taking over his work as he moves two fingers towards my entrance.

"Fuck, Syl-" I am cut off by him thrusting his fingers into me, a yelp of pleasure leaving my lips. He rubs against my walls aggressively, exploring my insides while his Evol rubs circles around my clit. He licks the spot he has been sucking, moving his mouth further down my neck and towards my breasts.

He suddenly stops, the complete lack of stimulation leaving me almost empty. "Sylus!" I whine, looking up at him with a pout on my face.

"I want this off," he mutters, tugging at the material of my dress. I stop him, staring him down defiantly. He raises an eyebrow at me, the question asking itself. "What could you possibly want?"

"Take yours off, too," I whine, and he shakes his head in disbelief. Without warning, my dress is lifted in the air by his Evol, the clothing falling onto the floor and leaving me completely bare in front of him.

I begin to argue, but he does the same for his shirt, leaving his sculpted upper half bare in front of me in all its glory. I can't help but run my hands along his body, and he groans at the feeling of my cold hands against his warm skin.

He pulls over a chair, knocking the notebook and measuring tape onto the ground as he goes to sit down. He beckons me over, and when I do not move fast enough, he wraps his Evol around me and pulls me over there himself.

I'm now sitting on his lap, my back against his naked torso. We are facing the floor-length mirror, my body on full display as I rest on top of him. He kisses the inside of my neck, his hands moving up to massage my breasts.

I moan, my head leaning back against him as I writhe in pleasure. I feel his Evol wrap around my head, tilting it back down until I am looking at myself in the mirror.

"No, I want you to watch. I want you to watch as I take what's mine," he purrs, his other hand moving down to resume its work in my pussy. He thrusts his fingers into me, his other hand tweaking my nipple between his fingers.

I let out a yelp of pleasure, fighting the urge to throw my head back again. Instead, I look at myself in the mirror, watching as his fingers pump in and out of my leaking cunt. It's orgasmic, the way he completely ruins me.

I look up to find that he is watching me in the mirror, his eyes now locking with mine as he fucks me with his fingers. I feel my stomach tighten, already on the verge of an orgasm.

While maintaining eye contact, I run my hand down towards his cock, palming him through his jeans. He lets out a groan, a dangerous look now shining in his eyes.

"Don't start what you can't finish, sweetie," he groans, his hand gripping my breast tighter. I continue rubbing against him through his jeans, his erection fighting against the tight zipper.

I feel a strong sensation of pleasure and look down to see that he has started rubbing against my clit as well, the Evol now taking over the working of my breasts.

I moan again, finally reaching my orgasm as I fall apart beneath his fingers. He lets my head fall back as I pant, my body shaking as he continues thrusting his fingers in and out of me.

When I finally come down from my high, he takes his fingers out of me, bringing them up to his lips and licking them hungrily. I stand up, my hands moving to his jeans as I fight to get them off. He helps me take them off, pulling down his boxers and letting his erection spring up towards me.

I kneel, my hands rubbing along the sides of his shaft sensually. "Do you know how you made me feel when you kneeled in front of me earlier? Do you know how close I was to taking you right there?" He asks, tilting my head up with his hand so that I am looking directly into his eyes.

I don't hesitate, maintaining eye contact with him as I take the tip of his cock in my mouth. He groans, running a hand through my hair and grabbing it roughly. I inch slowly down his shaft, making him suffer like how he made me suffer earlier.

"Fuck, you're such a brat," he groans, using his grip on my hair to push himself further into my mouth. I take him in eagerly, my tongue swirling around him as he moves in and out of my mouth. He curses under his breath, and I feel his cock twitch inside me.

I moan, the vibration against his cock sending him reeling. He pulls out of my mouth, panting. I begin to protest, but he puts a hand over my mouth. "You're getting me too close. There's more I want to do to you," he breathes, practically picking me up off the ground and leading me over to the chair.

He sits down, his cock standing at attention as he keeps me raised above him. "Are you ready?" He asks, his voice dripping in need. I nod, practically begging, and he lines himself up with my entrance.

"Hold on," he says, and I grip his shoulders tightly as he pushes himself into me. Something close to a scream escapes my throat, his entire length sheathed into me in one hard push. "You okay?" He asks, pausing to make sure I am not in pain.

"More. Please," I manage to whimper out. This is all the permission he needs, thrusting in and out of me at inhumane speeds as he groans into my neck.

He begins kissing my skin again, this time more sloppy as he licks up and down the column of my neck. A jolt of pleasure shoots through me, his cock hitting the deepest point of my pussy over and over again.

I bite into his neck, my hands still gripping tightly onto his shoulders as he lifts me up and down on his cock. He groans, his dick twitching inside of me eagerly.

"They should be just inside here," I hear Kieran's voice say from behind the door, his footsteps approaching closer.

"Shit," Sylus mutters, practically leaping up from the chair we are sitting on. Like lightning, he pulls us into one of the dressing rooms, his Evol grabbing our pile of clothes and bringing it in with us.

The door opens as soon as we are inside, barely seconds after we had made it to safety.

"Mr. Sylus? The tailor his here to see you," Kieran announces, before leaving the room. We sit in silence for a moment, before the tailor clears his throat.

"Sir?" He asks the empty room, "Trying something on?"

"Yes, just trying out one of the vests from the Fall Collection," Sylus says, his voice surprisingly even. It's then that his Evol lifts me into the air, his dick finding its way back to the entrance of my pussy.

"Syl-" I begin, but he covers my mouth with his hand as he thrusts back inside of me. I whimper, his hand muffling the sound as he continues to thrust in and out of me.

"Well, sir, I am here to take your measurements whenever you are done," the man says, oblivious to what his happening inside of his changing room.

"We have already taken care of that for you. Now, please leave us be," Sylus tells the man authoritatively, his finger moving to my clit as he continues to utterly destroy me. It takes everything in my power not to scream into his hand out of sheer pleasure.

"You've taken your own measurements?" The man asks, bewildered. "I must insist you let me do them. That way we can assure they are as accurate as can-"

"I assure you, they are accurate. Right, sweetie?" He asks me, uncovering my mouth as he continues to pound into me. I look at him with wide eyes, but he just raises an eyebrow, prompting me to answer the man.

"Y-yes. Everything i-is...great," I tell him, in the most even tone I can manage. Sylus has not stopped, his Evol dancing around my body and leaving goosebumps along my skin.

"You hear that? We're doing great. Now, wait for us downstairs, and don't bother us again."

The man apologizes before shuffling out, the door closing behind him. Sylus uncovers my mouth, only pounding harder into me. "Sylus! What if he- fuck- had h-heard us?"

Sylus just looks down at me, pressing down on my stomach to compress my walls even further. "Would you have liked that? If he had found me fucking you like this?" he asks, his cock twitching as if close to release.

"Fuck, Sylus," I moan, my own orgasm nearing closer. The many sensations- his finger on my clit, his dick pounding into me, his Evol around my tits- it's too much to bear.

"Please- Please, let me finish inside you," he groans, sweat dripping down his toned chest as he continues fucking me. He looks at me expectantly, and I just nod in response. He growls, his orgasm finally reaching the edge.

Mine arrives first, my legs shaking as my pussy pulsates around him. My nails scrape along his back, leaving long claw marks along his toned muscles. This sensation drags out his orgasm, his hot strands shooting into me and coating the walls he had spent so long destroying.

He continues moving as we both ride out our orgasms, his lips meeting mine and gently swirling his tongue in my mouth. When I finally stop writhing beneath him, he stops his movement, keeping his cock inside me.

He stops kissing me, choosing instead to look down at me fondly. He runs his thumb along my lips, letting it drag along my bottom lip slowly. I'm panting, my hair sticking to my forehead as I heave out a breath.

"You're beautiful," he murmurs, wiping away a tear that had run down my face from pure pleasure. "Why don't we give them our measurements over the phone? I think we should head back to my place and relax for the rest of the day."

I just nod, pulling him in for a kiss that makes the butterflies in my stomach resume their fluttering. He sighs into my mouth, kissing me back softly and pulling me closer to his warm body.

✧༺♛༻✧༺♛༻✧༺♛

Thanks for reading! As always, my asks are open (and anonymous) if anyone would like to request anything :)

-Robyn <3

#love and deepspace #smut #lads smut #love and deepspace smut #lads sylus #sylus smut #sylus lnd #sylus x reader #lnds #lnds smut

681 notes · View notes

miserycanary · 10 months ago

Text

MY HELL FOR YOUR LOVE ᡣ𐭩

♡⃛ ‘A Fixed Heart in Your Hand' alternative ending

pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley & fem!reader

synopsis: alternative ending because I feel bad for hurting y'all

tags: hurt/COMFORT, fluff

"Sir? Sir!”

Ghost flinches as he realizes he’s been spacing out, the florist now looking at him with furrowed eyebrows. “Are you going to buy something or not?” she snaps, motioning at the display of bouquets. “Uh, yeah. Give me something with hyacinth and baby breaths,” he mutters, handing her a 100 bill. “Hyacinth? Never thought I’d see a day where a man knows a different flower aside from roses, tulips, and sunflowers,” the vendor chuckles, arranging the flowers neatly and covering them with a brown printed paper tied with a twine. “Ah,… if I know something, it’s about her.” The florist smiles, handing Ghost the bouquet and his change while saying, “Well, I can see that you love her dearly.” With a soft smirk, he replies, “That I do.”

You’ve always had a love for flowers. Going as far as to even beg him to make you a flower bed. Ghost didn’t like doing physical labor with him already getting beat from training at the base, yet when you flashed him that smile (and gave a toe-curling blowjob), how could he refuse? Since then, flowers as gifts have been rare between you two. Instances where he’d give you one are when you’re on a terrible period day or during milestones (the flowers coming from the patch he secretly planted months before).

It’s been two days since you’ve left the apartment, staying at your friend’s house, but Ghost insists on having you keep some of your stuff in the unit because, “well, you technically have ownership of the place since we shared the payment for this month.” It was a poor excuse, really, but it worked. Ghost knows you well enough to know that you haven’t broken up with him despite what you said. Leaving and staying somewhere else is something you do when you’re hurt and need space, and he knows that deep inside, you’re waiting for him.

Don’t get him wrong. He doesn’t think you’re “easy to get” and he did really regret everything. The last 2 nights without you knocked some sense into him. The night felt colder, somber, and… lonely. Something he thought he would never complain about. I mean, this man has been through worse situations and he prefers solitude, but not if it’s solitude without you. You’re the one thing he can’t live without.

He has sent you multiple voicemails, messages, and even money as an apology. He’d always drop off by your friend’s place with some poorly attempted home-cooked meal of your favorite dishes. Sometimes he’d be able to steal a glance at you when he saw you coming up to the unit right before he arrived, sending flutters to his heart and butterflies in his stomach like a high school boy with a crush.

Now he stands by the door, hoping he’d leave the place with you in his arms, and him in your heart again. Three knocks (you always say less or more than that are for psychopaths) and a call of your name. Simon couldn’t help but chuckle when he heard your familiar cry, probably from rushing and stumbling. The wooden door cracked open, and the adrenaline that rushed through his nerves just from seeing you again could knock the man dead. He couldn’t even say anything except literally melt and give you the warmest smile. “Hi,” he softly greets, pulling the bouquet out of the paperbag and handing it to you with another gift. It was a charm... a tree bark with your initials engraved. You chuckle, pulling out the letter sticking out.

One thing you learned about your Simon was that he’s not entirely good at conveying his feelings. I mean, that’s literally the reason for this fight. Yet he got out of his comfort zone, wrote you a fucking letter.

You look at him, tears in your eyes before jumping into his arms.

“I fucking missed you, pretty girl,” he mutters, holding you up by your ass and pressing a deep kiss on your lips. God, you taste like heaven; you taste like salvation. He tangles his fingers in your hair and pushes you closer, afraid you’ll slip from his fingers again.

From that day on, Simon learned one thing. That he would rather go through the depths of hell (talk about his feelings) than go through a day without your love.

| The letter:

‘To my darling flower, I’m sorry for even hurting you. I’m sorry I was a shit-ass about how I processed my emotions and got you involved. You’ve always told me that you’re there for me but I didn’t want to burden you. I always want you to be happy but my actions just did the opposite. I’m sorry that I didn’t say anything that day. That I didn’t even ask you to stay. I’m sorry for being a coward. I’m sorry that I let you go.

With this letter, I ask for your forgiveness and for you to have me back. I will be better because I cannot afford to lose you for you have my heart and soul. You are my whole life. You are the thing that makes surviving each day worth it.’

꒰ა ☆ ໒: Now you guys know why Ghost calls Y/N ‘flower’. This the comfort alternative ending because it was also requested. 📩

dividers by @cafekitsune

Please reblog!! Ask is open!

⟢ taglist: @softestqueeen

check out my other works in the masterlist: ୭!

#simon ghost x you #simon riley fluff #simon riley cod #simon riley call of duty #simon ghost x reader #ghost x you #ghost x reader #simon riley x you #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley #ghost mw2 #ghost cod #cod modern warfare #cod x reader #ghost riley #simon riley #canary’s symphonies #canary’s melodies

2K notes · View notes

sexy-monster-fucker · 20 days ago

Text

Mile High Club

Aaron Hotchner x BAU!Reader

Summary: After a long case, and some things leading to leaving one of your coworkers behind, reader and Hotch are alone on the private jet.

CW: mile-high-club, drinking, childish antics from the BAU team while drunk, tit play, fingering, p in v, creampie

a/n: be gentle with me I’m still new to writing for Hotch— also idk what it is but other writers for Hotch have made him out to be a tits man and I don’t think I can deny that

Your team had been spread thin. Having the rare occurrence of an unsub possibly operating in cities way too far apart. Somehow sending half of you across states to investigate. Rossi, J.J., Derek, and Emily had stayed back in the initial state. Leaving you, Reid, and Hotch to hop on the plane. Checking everything out and finding the exact same patterns as the other murders.

Rossi had called after a few days. After accessing the situation, he thought it would be best for Derek and himself to come take the place of two of you. Thinking they would have some kind of expertise for the area, but also making sure no single group was obscenely outnumbered. Hotch had no problem with the idea. Wanting to get back to the original sight to look further into things.

“Y/N,” Hotch had knocked on the door of your hotel room, letting himself in like you had told him he could. Sometimes wanting his company. Enjoying hearing his deep, steady voice talk about anything. Causing your stomach to swirl around itself when bumps would prickle down your skin at how he said your name.

You sat on the edge of your bed still not fully dressed. Your lower half completely covered, but still only in your bra. You hurried to throw on your blouse as Hotch stepped in. Silently apologizing to him as you fumbled over the buttons. Dark eyes darted down to your bare chest, quickly going back up to your face. “Apologies, I didn’t know you weren’t ready for company,” Hotch craned his neck looking up at the ceiling while you buttoned the shirt. Noticing a soft glow on his cheeks.

Hotch was your superior. Leader of the team. And your not-so-secret crush.

One night, you and your teammates had all been drinking. Hotch and Rossi opting to not come along. You had been deep into drinking when a question had been brought up. Playing childish high school games where the boys and girls would ask each other horny questions. Derek, of course, being the one to ask.

“Alright— I’ve got a good one for the ladies. Fuck, Marry, Kill. Hotch, Rossi, Gideon.” His drunken smirk made some of you roll your eyes. J.J.’s jaw hung open as she and Emily laughed together. Penelope started to speak when you blurted out, “Definitely marry Hotch, so I could fuck him for the rest of my life.”

All eyes were on you now. Not caring with how the alcohol buzzed in your system. Scanning everyone’s facing to see some serious mixed reactions. You threw your hands up slightly, “What?!”

“You would wanna marry that hard-nosed tyrant?” Derek smiled.

You furrowed your brows, looking next to you at Reid. Seeing his expression being equally as shocked. “Wh—? I thought all of us would agree on that one! He’s a good dad, good physique, and~ a sexy voice to boot,” you counted on your fingers, not a hint of shame on your voice.

“But that’s not what you said,” Reid smirked at you. You looked around the table to see everyone agreeing with teasing tones.

“Yeah— you said so you could fuck him for the rest of your life, not any of those other things,” J.J. giggled as she bumped your shoulder.

“And— you didn’t even say your picks for the other two!” Derek laughed.

You rolled your eyes, leaning your head back and covering your face. Embarrassment finally washing over you at the reveal of your feelings for your boss. “Oh my God—“ you started smiling widely with flushed cheeks.

“Ah— look! You really like him!” Emily smiled as she sipped at her drink again.

And you did. The way he carried himself. The way his gruff voice could carry a room. His determination for the BAU and solving cases drawing you to him. It did not help that Hotch clearly had his eye on you as well. Gaze lingering on you in every room you shared. Attentive when you would present a summary to the group, never removing his eyes from you. Soft, rare smiles when you would crack some joke about his age. Words of encouragement when it was just the two of you awake on the plane. Eyes twinkling when he heard your laugh on nights out. Always finding his place next to you anywhere: on the plane, at the bar, in the office. Unable to forget the night you had drifted away against his shoulder after a rather grueling month of a case. Turning into you openly flirting with him from time to time.

Your little crush on him was more than meets the eye.

“No, sir. I apologize. I should always be ready just in case we needed to jump into action,” you finally got the last button up. Turning to grab your coat off the spare chair in the room. Catching Hotch’s eyes scanning your figure. You smiled.

“You and I have to head back. Rossi and Derek want to come look at the scene and I don’t want to leave anyone with small numbers,” Hotch said his stoic tone vibrating off the walls.

“What about Spence?”

“Derek and Rossi are already on their way. He won’t be alone,” he reassured.

“Okay, good. I wouldn’t wanna leave your favorite boy alone,” you joked walking over and closing the distance between you. Noticing his tie was not fully fixed. Hands pinching and fidgeting the fabric. Hotch stretched his neck, “What… are you doing?” His hand came up and grabbed yours gently.

“Since when do you not get finished getting ready?” You ignored his question as you continued fixing him.

“Guess I was just in a rush… with the flight and all,” Hotch relaxed at your touch. You knew better than that. Wondering what could have caused it. Not questioning him further. Softly flattening your hand against the tie before you realized how intimate of an action it was. Batting your lashes up at him. Seeing his eyes were already on your face. Heavy brow but a soft expression. “Thank you,” his voice was soft for the first time today.

He was just so gorgeous. You felt butterflies flapping around your insides. Wanting to press into him. Wanting him to pin you down on the mattress of the hotel room. Dying to see what he looked like while you had his dick in your mouth.

You had to stop yourself. Realizing the silence was going on longer than intended. Chuckling to yourself to ease the tension. Quickly pulling your hand away and clinching your fist by your side. “How long til they get here?”

“Twenty minutes. We need to leave now,” Hotch stated. He walked to the door, opening it and allowing you to exit first. Reid was out in the hallway, leaned against the door of his room. Arms crossed over his chest as he watched you and Hotch approach.

“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” You questioned him. Reid was one of your closest friends on the team. He was not much younger than you, yet you still felt like he was still so new. Wanting to make sure he was comfortable and going to be safe. Especially since things had gone down between him and an unsub on a previous case.

“Of course I will,” Reid smiled, eyes looking at both you and Hotch.

“Call me if anything happens,” you began towards the elevator, Hotch followed closely behind you. Silently riding down to the lobby together. Lips sewn together as neither of you dared to make a sound. Shoes tapping against the hard floor as you went out to the SUV.

“You driving or me?” You playfully asked.

Hotch did not look up at you. Staring at his phone, “I will.” That stabbed you. He would usually make some sly comment about the time you hit a light pole in a rush leaving a parking lot. But now he did not even look at you.

Replying with a simple “Okay” as you go into the passenger seat. Nothing was said until you arrived at the plane. Being greeted with a smile from Derek and Rossi.

“Hi, pretty girl,” Derek adjusted his sunglasses with his words. Rossi and Hotch stepped aside to debrief together quickly. Derek caught you up on all the new details and what caused Rossi to want to come out to this scene. This case was a tough one all things considered.

You caught Hotch’s stern brow directed at you as he and Rossi talked back and forth. Wondering why he was making that face at you. Clearly losing focus of what Derek was saying. Coming back when he repeated your name, “Y/N-? You have a whole flight back to stare at McDreamy, okay? Listen to me right now.”

You whipped your head forward, brows pushed together as you mouthed defenses. Closing your eyes and shaking your head to bring your focus back. “Sorry,” you grumbled as you crossed your arms over your chest.

“J.J.’s got all the files printed for you on the plane. I’m sure Hotch will wanna take a look first. It’s a heavy one so prepare for all the new stuff,” Derek tilted his head with his words.

Hotch marched over to you. Eyeballing Derek before focusing his attention on you, “Let’s go.” You nodded. Saying your goodbyes to Derek as you boarded the plane. Nestling up against the wall of the plane. Hum of the engine vibrating your ears. Comforting you.

You watched Hotch sort through files. Enjoying the comfortable silence on the flight. Loving how his hands looked gripping the folders and papers. Blushing when you thought above how perfectly his fingers would stretch you.

“So,” you broke the silence. Causing Hotch’s eyes to dart up to you quickly before falling back onto the papers. “Why did you want me to come and not Reid?”

Hotch’s movements completely halted. Jaw clenching at your question. Watching his fingers crinkle the paper more than before. His Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat. Brow pushed firmly down.

“Spencer and Derek make a great team. Pretty boy and boy genius or whatever you girls say,” Hotch spoke quicker than normal, clearly lying. Just how you wanted him.

“Really?”

Hotch nodded. Eyes never moving from their spot on the page.

“I don’t know if I believe you… Aaron,” you smirked using the informality. That one got his attention. Laying the paper down on his lap and rolling his shoulders. Straightening his posture and crossing his hands over his lap. Fully focused on you across from him now.

“Don’t profile me,” Hotch’s corner of his mouth curving slightly with his words. Allowing his guard to drop if only for a moment. Tightly knitted eyebrows relaxing for the first time.

“Oh, I’m not. Just being observant,” you teased, sitting forward for your elbows to be resting on your knees. Becoming suddenly aware of your cleavage hanging out when Hotch’s eyes jumped down.

You sat back up, “Because if I was profiling you, you would be making it too easy on me.”

Hotch cocked an eyebrow at you, sitting with his legs spread wide open, “Is that so?”

“Seeing how you’ve stared at my chest twice today, I’d say so. Oh, and your tie this morning? I’ve never seen you not finish tightening it. And how relaxed you are right now. Your pupils darkened when you finally looked at me, and you keep fidgeting your fingers. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you wanted to be alone with me on this flight,” you smirked resting back against your seat to mimic how he sat.

Hotch’s brows raised for a moment as his lips sealed together, fighting an obvious smile. “Aren’t I just giving you what you wanted?” He questioned.

Your stomach flipped. Confused by what he was implying, “Wh-what?”

“Since we’re profiling… I’ve caught you staring at me more than once since yesterday. Each time I caught you, you would quickly turn away or wave at me. Clearly, a sign you were checking me out yourself. Or how about you not being ready this morning? I told you exactly what time we would be up in the morning. I did not arrive even a minute early and you still weren’t dressed. And given your history with punctuality, I know you’re not the type to be late,” Hotch crossed his arms over his chest.

God. He was such a good profiler.

Reading into things you had not even realize you had done. You felt your cheeks heat up with a mix of embarrassment and arousal. Completely blown away with his talent to understand people almost better than they do themselves.

You crossed your legs tightly. Feeling your core aching. Mouth attempting to form words that could not escape.

“If you’d asked I would’ve this morning, Y/N,” Hotch tilted his head.

You felt your body breakout in a sweat. Refusing to question further on what he was referring to. Feeling your stomach constrict. Eyes widening while you looked at the cocky man across from you. Far too relaxed with the conversation. Your mind racing to tell you he thought it was all some joke. Perhaps one of your coworkers had told him what you said that night out drinking.

Hotch refocused on some of the papers. You chewed at your thumbnail. Going through every single possible meaning of what he said.

“Excuse me,” you stood and walked to the tiny plane restroom. Quickly closing the door behind you.

Your hands gripped the small counter. Veins popping against the bruising white force. Sweating as you felt the arousal sticking against your pussy. Flustered with your desire and how it consumed you.

There was a knock.

Your throat tightened. Had you really been in there that long? Lost that much track of time simply from dreaming of Hotch?

Stumbling over a “Sorry” as you pretended to be washing your hands. Opening the door to see Hotch standing in the doorway. Arm resting on the frame above it. Body blocking your escape. Eyebrows flat against his eyes. There was a silence as you awkwardly swallowed.

“Can I come in?” Hotch flatly asked.

“Y-Yes, sir. Sorry,” you attempted to squeeze past him. His arms came down and stiffened stopping you.

“That’s not what I mean,” his voice fell dark as he walked forward. Corning you in the tiny room. Strong shoulders and broad chest making you swoon. You turned your back to him. Going back to holding onto the counter. Hotch shut the door behind him, locking it.

Tension was high between you. The small room felt overwhelmingly stuffy. Your heartbeat was in the back of your throat. Mouth hung open just enough for you to breathe. Looking up and seeing him standing behind you with a look in his eyes you had never seen on him before. Falling back into the bowl of the sink. Steadying your breathing as you closed your eyes.

You jumped when one of his hands flattened against your lower back. Shooting your eyes open to see he had closed the small gap between you.

“Is this okay?” His slow and steady voice asked permission.

You nodded slowly. Unsure of what was exactly happening between you.

Hotch’s strong hands sprawled across your lower front. Holding your body flush against his. His nose tucked into the crook of your neck. Deep eyes staring at you in the mirror. Fingers groped into your flesh. Breath from his nose warmed up your skin.

Tender lips fell against your throat. Kissing up to your jawline. Melting into him. Body relaxing understanding the rhythm he wanted to start. Your hand went back to tangle in his hair when you felt his teeth graze you.

There was no way this was actually happening.

Large hands ventured up your chest. Palming at your tender breasts. Pulling a soft moan from you when his calloused fingers pinched at your nipple. Hands unbuttoning the top few buttons so he could slide down it. Large palms running down your chest. Kneading the plump mounds. Feeling your rapid heartbeat on his fingers.

“You’re a good profiler,” Hotch kissed your cheek with his final word, lips resting against your ear. Your body flushed with heat from the combination of everything.

You breathlessly questioned, head falling back against him.

Watching him smile against your skin with your distraught state, “Cat got your tongue, Y/L/N?” He sucked on your neck pulling a moan from you. His sultry voice had you melting in his hands. Eyes falling shut as you felt anticipation building below your belt.

A pinch of your nipple forcing your eyes back open. “Come on, show me how good of a profiler you are. Tell me why I came in here,” Hotch’s voice vibrated your neck. Kissing between your shoulder and jugular. His tone encouraging you to speak.

You swallowed hard. Mouth running dry with desire. “Y-You— based off you-your body language in the doorway, you obviously didn’t need to use the bathroom—“

“Hmm. You didn’t either,” Hotch cut you off playfully. One of his hands beginning to trace down your front. Circling your nearly exposed breasts and down the button line of your shirt, resting on the button of your pants. Pinching at it softly, as if he was slowly trying to undo it.

“An-And the tone of y-your voice tells me you clearly had something else in mind when you came in h-here with me. Not exactly HR friendly for m-my boss to be touching me like this,” you toyed with him. Dark eyes stared into yours in the mirror once again. His body swaying you back and forth slowly as he waited. Fingers finally undoing the button and sliding just the tips of his fingers under your panty line.

“Based off your er-erection pressing into my back, and the way you kept l-laying stuff over your lap earlier…. If I was to guess what your ac-actual plan w-was, I’d say y-you wanted me to ride you o-out there in your seat. But when I stormed off, you ha-had to go to Plan B,” you smiled. His fingers dipped further, ghosting right above your clit.

“And what’s Plan B?” Hotch whispered in your ear. Running his fingers through your soaked folds. Your fingers laced through his hair at the feeling, mouth hanging open.

“You’re gonna fuck m-me on the counter?” you moaned when he dipped a finger inside you. Curling and pumping perfectly.

“Good girl,” he praised finally sinking two fingers into your folds. Steadily sliding them in and out of you, hitting the spots inside you that had your legs wobbling. Thick fingers perfectly working inside you. Pulling repetitive moans from you. One of your hands came up to cover your mouth to hide the noises.

Hotch’s hand pulled your grasp away, “It’s just us. I want to hear you.” Placing your hand against his lips as his other hand pleasured you. Pad of his thumb flattening and circling your throbbing clit. Causing you to buck forward, a soft scream of a moan escaping. Fingers curled, hitting and scrapping the spongy spot that caused your legs to shake and breath hitch.

Abruptly, he removed his fingers causing you to whine. Hands on your hips guiding you to turn around. Small of your back bumping the counter as you faced him. Face flushed and panting as you attempting to look at his face. Having to tuck your head from his eyes. Feeling like an awkward first date.

Hotch nudged your chin upwards. Pulling your eyes to hold onto his. Leaning in and planting his lips against yours. Your hands ran up his chest, wrapping around his neck. Your fronts were pressed flush together. Lips sloppily attached to each other. Tongues slipping into one another’s mouth, tasting the other like it was the last time you ever could. Desperate hands held onto you. Fingers digging into the soft of your ass.

“Have you ever done this before?” You questioned as he pulled back to kneel in front of you. A soft hint of concern.

Hotch’s dreamy dark eyes looked up at you, smiling. Seeing his perfect teeth. A treat that only few got to see. He hooked his fingers around your waistband, pulling them down your legs and helping you step out. “Absolutely not,” he stated matter-of-factly with a slight chuckle.

You ran your fingers through his hair as he was below you. Warm eyes blinked up at you. Seeing a side of him you never thought you would. Looking soft and almost lovesick. You wondered if this is what he was like before the horrors of the BAU caused him to harden. Breaking through his hard shell, revealing some of the sweetest looks you had ever received. Under it all, he was a man who loved to please.

Your thumb traced his face, admiring him for the first time this closely. Noticing more beauty marks on his face. Clearly littered with stress lines from years of working. He cupped your hand in his, kissing it softly as he nuzzled against it. He adored how soft your hands still were.

He rose to his feet, hands cupping both sides of your face as he crashed his lips back into yours. Open-mouth kisses being shared as you tried to unbutton his shirt. Wanting to see his body. His actions were hungry. Hands coming down to grasp at your chest once again. Dipping his head down to suck on the exposed part of your breast. Pulling the fabric down to free your breasts. Sucking on your hardened nipples. Tongue flicking and rolling them around. Making sure he gave both the same attention. Kissing up your neck.

Hotch pulled your underwear to the side. Easing his fingers back inside you. Your entire body tingled with pleasure. Wrapping a bow in your lower half. You held onto his shoulders for support, pleasure surging through you with each movement of fingers.

There was a million questions plaguing your mind. Face contorted with curiosity and pleasure. Worried that this would all somehow comeback to bite you both in the ass. How deep down you did not want to just be a cheap hookup on the plane. Your feelings for Hotch flowed through you like blood. Taking up your entire being.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this,” Hotch, almost as if he was reading your mind, confessed. His normal unbending composure melting away as he delved into you. His words shocking you slightly. “I know I’m your superior. And I know this is completely inappropriate,” he kissed you once again, “But I can’t keep dancing around you.”

You smiled. His words heating up your cheeks as you deepened the kiss. Sensation of his thumb back on your nub causing you to gasp. You began grinding against his hand. Searching for a release that you could practically taste. Calling out to him, “Hotch…”

Hotch shook his head aggressively, “Aaron. I want you to call me Aaron.”

You smirked. Desperation written on his half broken voice. Looking down to see the outline of his hard-on pressed against his slacks. Rutting forward to grind against him too. Hotch’s air tightened in his throat at the feeling of any stimulation against his member.

“Aaron—“

“Oh that’s it. Sounds so pretty when you’re like this,” Hotch groaned. Rolling his hips against the place where his fingers entered you. Begging for friction that matched what you were doing to his hand.

Your hands fought the belt around his waist. Prying it open and undoing his button. Fighting to shimmy his pants down his legs. Exposing his strong thighs and boxer-briefs. Curved cock pressing against his leg.

“I want to be inside you,” Hotch mumbled between kisses. Heavily breathing. He removed his fingers from you, hands curving around the back of your thighs. Helping you up on the countertop. The perfect height for him to reach you. His calloused hands ghosted up your exposed legs. Adjusting to make sure you were slightly hanging off the edge.

Quickly, he pulled his underwear down. Cock springing free. Swollen and leaking with precum. Thick vein running up the underside of it. You could feel your mouth water and pussy clench around nothing. Your body craved him like he was some lost piece of you. His large hands stroked himself. Dark, amber eyes asking permission silently.

Hands danced up his arms. Softly stroking the hair until it met the half rolled-up fabric at his elbow, resting on the seam line on his shoulders. Half-lidded bulbs adoring your figure in front of him. Digits squeezing around the head as he lined himself up with your opening.

First he pressed only the head in, making sure to adjust to you properly. Inching further into you until his hips were flush with yours. His jaw hung open at the feeling. Rolling his neck and taking in deep breaths. His cock stretched you perfectly. Never expecting him to feel so good inside you. You clung to his back, nails digging into the flesh. His chin sat upon your shoulder as you stalled. Enjoying the closeness.

Hotch pulled back slowly, looking down to watch himself enter you again. His face contorting in pure ecstasy. “I’ve never felt anything this good,” he exhaled against your skin. Rolling his hips into you. Steadily finding a pace inside. Squeaks and moans fell from your mouth each time he would hit deep inside you. Head of his cock brushing the spot that made you see stars.

And he was good. More experienced than anyone you had ever been with before. Knowing the perfect way to get you clinging to him and begging. Lewd sounds of skin smacking together reverberated off the tight space. Sloppy as your cunt drenched him in your arousal. Hotch grunted with each thrust. Shaky breathing painting his figure.

“Hotch, fuck, Hotch,” you mumbled like a mantra.

Hotch’s brow furrowed and eyes locked with yours. Realizing your mistake and correcting accordingly.

“Aaron,” you made it more sensual.

Music to his ears. Apparent by the smile that overtook his red face. Sweat beamed down his forehead. His fingers that were previously inside you coming up to rub your clit. Causing your walls to clinch down on him.

Hotch smiled, kissing your cheek sweetly. Featherlight kisses trailed down to below your ear. “Are you gonna cum for me?” Hotch’s hoarse voice drove you crazy. Drunk on his high for you. Knowing if things continued like this he would finish soon.

You nodded. At a loss for words. Completely overwhelmed by arousal. Pressing your lips to his. Trying to catch your breath. Hotch’s free hand tangled in your hair. Sloppily kissing back and forth. Teeth bumping each other accidentally. “Talk to me, baby. I wanna hear that sweat voice of yours,” Hotch spoke in between kisses. The pet name twisting your insides tighter.

“Aaron,” you moaned, “I want you to cum inside me. Please…” Drawling out your words when he hit especially deep.

“You do?” Hotch’s brow cocked upward, his tone with a hint of tease.

“Yes, please,” you groaned.

“I love that you ask so nicely. I’m gonna need you to finish first though,” Hotch tenderly kissed you as his fingers hurried around your throbbing nub. You whined softly. The feel of him inside you causing you to be a mess. Hands coming up to grasp his face, holding his lips to yours. Lips interlocking over and over. Almost in rhythm with his hips.

The knot in your lower half was tightening like a thin rope trying to hold a ship to the dock. Straining to keep your composure, needing to relax and come undone. Muscles contorting at his bruising pace. Wanting to savor every single moment so that it would never leave your mind.

Fingers circled your extremely sensitive nub. Causing your legs to shake, trying to stabilize yourself by digging your heels into his lower back. Hotch adored the deepening of the intimacy. Feeling his cock twitch inside you, he knew he could not hold off much longer.

“I know you can do it. Let me have it, Y/N,” Hotch’s breathy voice rang through your ears. Even when he was buried inside you, his leadership shined through. Almost like he was coaching you through your orgasm.

“Aaron,” you squeaked. His tongue slipped between your lips. Hunger taking over, fingers firm against your sensitivity. You wrapped your arms around him, nails and heals digging into his back. Knot inside you finally releasing itself. Your walls constricted around his girth. You called out to him, unable to make any cohesive sentences or words. Babbling as your walls fluttered around him.

“Doesn’t that feel better?” Hotch grinned. Beginning to snap his hips harshly into you. Shortly reaching his own climax. White hot coated your still sensitive insides. Hotch grunted as he rutted into you. Holding you as close as possible waves washed through you both. Fingers bruising into your soft flesh.

Hotch remained inside you. Both of your chests heaving. Attempting to fill your lungs back up. Kiss swollen lips planting against his cheek. Feeling his skin bunch up into a grin.

“We can’t tell anyone about this,” his stern tone partially returning. Still soft and slurred with his high. His hand petted you. The softest you had ever seen Hotch be.

“Does that mean we can’t do this again?”

Hotch paused. Forehead scrunched in thought. “Of course not,” he kissed your lips, “It’s just not something we need spread around.”

You beamed. Cheeks glowing with excitement. Giddy that this was not a one time thing. Hotch’s brown eyes shining in then dim-lit bathroom. The two of you holding steady for a moment. Neither of you wanting to separate.

Hotch twisted his wrist to look at his watch. Expression falling flat when he saw the time. “We’ll be landing shortly,” he straightened his back. Both of you wincing when his softening member slipped out of you. Feeling a mixture of juices run between your thighs.

Hotch wrapped some of the extremely thin toilet paper around his fingers. Layering it so that it would be more absorbent. Gently cleaning up the mess between your legs. Jumping when he wiped up against your clit. Capturing you in a kiss as a semi-apology.

Hotch moved your panties back over your worked opening. Helping get you cleaned up and dressed. His large palms held both sides of your face. Smiling with pink cheeks as he licked his lips. Like there was something more he wanted to say, but could not get out.

You turned around to make sure you look put together in the mirror. Seeing Hotch watch your every move. Fixing his own tie and sleeves. Both of you patted down your tattered hair. Hotch leaned forward and placed a tender kiss on the top of your head.

The two of you took your seats next to each other out in the cabin. You rested your head on his shoulder, his arm laced around your back. Fingers twirling your hair. His other hand examined your fingers. As if he was trying to engrave them into his memory. There was only a few moments before you landed and got into the SUV that would be escorting you.

You leaned your head against the glass of the back window. Sitting what felt like miles away from Hotch compared to how close you had been previously. Silently being drove to meet your other teammates. Looking over at your boss. Causing his eyes to dart over to you as well. A closed mouth smile beaming on his face. Eyes squinting up as he reached his hand over to yours. Lacing your fingers together.

An intimate gesture that you imagined would be few and far between going forward. Thoroughly enjoying the feeling of your hands together. Loathing the thoughts in your mind that reminded you that this was going to be secret. Guilt of the inappropriate nature of it, by the BAU’s standards. But when you felt Hotch’s fingers tighten, it pulled you out of it. Settling in for the short car ride to meet your coworkers.

A hollow feeling settling in the depths of your stomach when he pulled away. All kindness and softness leaving his figure and expression as he straightened his back. Hands flattening his slacks and adjusting his tie. Adjusting your posture to match his. Eyes watching as you pulled into the parking lot. Seeing J.J. and Emily standing out front of the local station.

A silent look towards each other before opening your doors. An acknowledgment that once these doors were open, everything went back to the way it was before. SSA Aaron Hotchner. Your superior. And you, SSA Y/N Y/L/N, his subordinate. Nothing more than that.

Click of the car door had you greeting the other women with smiles. Nothing too crazy, due to the severity of the case. Noting the half-lidded looks directing back to Hotch. Emily’s teeth grazed her lip as she and J.J. giggled when you finally got close to them. You widened your eyes at them, cheeks beaming like a teenager who just got back from talking to their crush.

“Well, how was your plane ride back with Hotch?” Emily raised her brow.

You blinked.

“Uh— good… just, good,” you stammered softly.

“Did you profess your undying desire for him?” J.J. folded her fingers together and fluttering her lashes to mock you.

You rolled your eyes, smiling. Exhaling with the million things you could say. Knowing you never could tell anyone else. Catching the last glimpse of Hotch as he entered the building. Seeing his eyes scanning you over his shoulder.

“Can you brief me as we head inside?” You asked marching towards the door.

~~~

[END]

// Thank you so much for reading! This is my very first time writing for Hotch, and I really hope to write for him more in the future. This may be some people’s first time on my blog. If you have any requests, my inbox is always open! If you would like to be tagged in future works, please let me know!! //

{tags}

@megangovier ~ @bondwithme-murderstyle ~ @justyourusualash ~ @hoffmanfan13 ~ @kaysolai ~

#aaron hotchner #aaron hotch x reader #hotch x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #writing #sexymonsterfics #thomas gibson #thomas gibson x reader #fanfic

398 notes · View notes

harstyle · 1 year ago

Text

… I think I love you

Summary: you definitely like Harry, and he may like you, but your insecurities might be preventing you from ever finding out— featuring a friends-with-benefits situation, a heavy dose of self degradation and miscommunication between both characters.

Pairing: normie!reader x famous!harry

Warnings: there’s a lot of crying

Word-count: around 3.2k

a/n: this idea came to me when I saw this couple at a party yesterday and she was sitting in his lap and he was peppering kisses along her neck and I just love love, so here we go (obviously it wouldn’t be fun without at least a little angst tho). I did write this in like an hour and I didn‘t edit, so go easy on me :).

Harry was being weird.

He was touching her all over, pulling her to sit in his lap and peppering kisses along the expanse of her neck, all while keeping his arms circled around her waist. He was resting his chin on her shoulder, staying mostly quiet even though he usually always had something to say. He was stroking her skin, touching wherever he could get through to her winter clothing. He was ignoring all of the strange looks he was receiving from his friends, lips molding into a slight smirk against her skin as they spoke politics and gossip at the table.

Y/N had a horrible feeling in her stomach. It was unusual for Harry to show so much affection around their friends— the two of them had just agreed that their friends didn’t need to see so much of their arrangement. It wasn’t like they were dating, or better yet, in love, so keeping it to themselves seemed like the sensible thing to do. Don’t get her wrong; their friends knew about it, but Y/N and Harry mostly kept the physical aspects in the bedroom for no one to see. He surely had never been so blatant about it.

Her heart was pounding. To be fair, her heart always did that when Harry was around. Y/N had had a crush on Harry since she’d met him years ago, but back then she hadn’t thought she’d have much of a chance with him. Y/N had heard of him dating supermodels, rich girls with a ‘perfect figure’ and scandalous backgrounds and had always kept the idea of a relationship with Harry Styles far far away in the name of self preservation.

But then he’d kissed her.

He’d been drunk when he’d done it, but Y/N hadn’t cared in the slightest. When morning came, Harry had explained that he wasn’t looking for a relationship and that while he thought Y/N was wonderful, he didn’t want anything serious with her.

She’d remembered those words and lived religiously by them.

Only ever calling him when she really needed him, allowing him to knock on her door whenever he felt like fucking her, being okay with acting in the role of little play toy even though she’d always liked him.

And it wasn’t like their arrangement wasn’t mutual— it had started out that way, but it was slowly eroding her mind— exhausting her until all she did some nights was cry.

And even though Harry’s touch felt wonderful, and his confident display of affection had initially warmed her heart, all she wanted to do right now was cry. Cry because she was realizing, through all of this, that something like this was all she’d ever wanted. With Harry, without Harry— she’d been needing something real, and this wasn’t real. This was all pretend, a silly arrangement between two incompatible friends; one famous bastard and one delusional office job girl, his handsome face and her insecure mind.

She couldn’t handle being with him sometimes. She would open the door of her apartment, let her eyes trail over his features and doubt that he wanted to be there with her. It seemed so farfetched that he would want to fuck her, that he’d want to touch her body and kiss away her fears. She almost felt disgusted by it, by his touch, knowing that he’d touched other, better women— and many of them.

She always made him turn the lights off.

So there was no doubt that he was drunk out of his mind right now. Because why else would inform their whole friend group— not just select friends, their whole group which consisted of some mere acquaintances, of their relationship. Situationship. Whatever it had blossomed into.

Harry’s hand was burning against her stomach and she couldn’t do it anymore. She excused herself quietly to the bathroom. Y/N knew Harry’s house like the back of her hand, so she found it rather easily and walked inside. She didn’t lock the door, just washed her hands. Over, and over, and over again. She washed away all of her horrible, degrading thoughts and tried to drown out the mean voices.

You are your own worst enemy.

The knock she heard on the door was loud, but it didn’t interrupt her train of thoughts. She kept her mind on his hands, his wonderful hands, on her disgusting skin. She wanted to wash away the pain.

She could see Harry out of her periphery. She went back to the soap dispenser.

“You okay?”

Her hands became rougher with it as his voice invaded on her privacy. Her eyes became glossy as she turned on the water again. There was no doubt in her mind that Harry was watching her every move, but she didn’t really care about that.

“Y/N, turn the water off.”

She did it almost instantaneously, like she’d been needing somebody other than herself to tell her to do it because her mind wasn’t strong enough to convince her of it on its own. Harry grabbed a towel, slowly drying her hands and massaging them until they were warm and dry again.

He was staring at her, but she didn’t care if she looked strange to him now. She was strange. She’d always felt like she was faking around Harry— like she needed to be a certain version of herself in order for him to like her, and so there was this wall of pretentiousness that came with being around him.

Sometimes she wasn’t perfect or sensible, sometimes she wanted to wash her hands like a lunatic and cry all the while doing it, so he needed to finally see that. See the pain he was causing her.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, eyes trailing over her features delicately.

“Nothing,” she answered with her gaze on her hands, which were still in the towel.

“Do you want me to kick them out?”

“No,” she shook her head quickly, very decisive in her answer. “Don’t kick them out.”

It was a weird concept anyway, kicking his own friends out so he could… what, comfort her out of whatever state she’d landed in?

He took her hands delicately and interlaced them with his, throwing the towel onto the floor somewhere. She watched as it fell, as her hands found their new home in his, and finally looked up to see Harry already looking at her.

“Don’t look at me like that,” she said, almost furious.

“Like what?” He had this innocent glint in his eye, void of any bad intentions and almost oblivious to her anger.

“Like you want to kiss me.”

“I do want to kiss you,” he smiled. Then he squeezed her hands, “can I?”

Y/N had never really learned how to say no, so with her silence, but also her body inching closer to his, came the approval he was looking for. He anchored a hand onto her jaw, allowing his lips to linger on hers with a solid grasp.

Her eyes fluttered shut, the tears forming in them finally released.

Y/N deepened it, trying to latch into him even more to make these feelings go away, convince herself that everything would be fine as long as Harry was actually kissing her, but the ill feeling in her stomach worsened.

She broke away from him, pressing her forehead to his chin, and shook her head. “I can’t do this anymore.”

He was still smiling. “What?”

Panic had risen in her chest, but she still wanted to go through with this.

“I want to end this.” This because she had no idea what they were.

Harry’s eyebrows drew together in concern but when he let his hands rest on her waist, she pulled away. “I can’t. I don’t want this anymore.”

“You mean— what, you mean us?”

She nodded, “I’m sorry.”

“Why… I mean, what… since when have you—“

“Weeks, I think. I need time alone, away from you. I can’t… I want something more than this.”

He pulled away, “oh.”

“Not with you!“ she rushed to say, later realizing that it had sounded a bit offensive when he frowned in response, “but I’m getting older and I need to feel like I’m going somewhere with my life, you know? Can’t just keep being somebody’s fuck buddy.”

The words tasted sour on her tongue.

“Oh,” he said again, and it drove her crazy. Why couldn’t he just say something other than that?

He was so enigmatic that it was hard to say goodbye to him, but she had to. She had to cut ties, at least for a little, so she could recover and find somebody who didn’t make her feel bad about herself, but also did everything else exactly the way Harry did them.

“Alright, if that’s what you want,” he nodded. It was robotic, his face stoic.

There was no fight in him— she didn’t know whether she was delighted or angered by it.

She was staring at him like she wanted to memorize every curve of his mouth, his nose, the exact shade of his irises. She knew this was the end, their demise, and if she never got to be close with him again, maybe it would be fine if she could look back and remember everything about him.

Y/N left Harry in that bathroom and headed straight home.

—

Y/N hadn’t seen any of her friends in a month. Her time had been overwhelmed with work and therapy, days spent at home crying because the lack of a romantic future in her life had finally sunk in. She was broken. She was hurt and ruined, and it had all really been her fault.

But she wanted to get out again. She wanted to see her friends and let her lips curl into a relieved smile at the sight of them goofing around drunk, or making jokes about how hellish it was to be alive.

She’d gone over the possibility of running into Harry and decided it would be fine, that she’d taken enough time away to cope with seeing him again.

He arrived at Sarah’s house at 10 pm, a glass of wine latched onto his glove-covered hand. Y/N watched from the kitchen as he gave her a hug, toed off his shoes and caught her eyes. He tried to smile, as did she, and raised his arm in a wave. Y/N nodded in acknowledgement, beginning to play with the bottle of beer in her hands. She was nervous. She was broken.

Her friends had seen it, of course, the exchange, but they stayed quiet. Neither of them had spoken about their falling out, but their scattered separate arrivals at house gatherings as well as her loud absence from the last few ones had confirmed things further.

She’d tried to avoid him, but Sarah’s house wasn’t as big as Harry’s. There was less space and everywhere she was, Harry couldn’t be more than a few feet away. There was a magnetic force that she was trying to ignore, as well as the pained looks he would be so blatant about.

Once things had quieted down, and the group had left to scatter in small gatherings around the fire place, on the couch, outside on the patio, Y/N felt it the best opportunity to sneak into the corridor where no one was around.

Well, no one but him. He always seemed to find her.

“I went on a date last week.”

Y/N sighed, “you’ve gotta stop following me around—“

“Because I hadn’t, you know,” he said, voice cracking and hand tightening around his glass, “I hadn’t been on one in months. Ever since we started, actually. Never thought it was necessary, or that I wanted to. But then you left, and I thought about what you said, and I really wanted to date. So I went to the bar, you know? I went to the bar and I… I saw this girl, and she was beautiful. She had long, wavy hair and she wore these really cute glasses, you know? Like, these brown tortoiseshell glasses similar to the ones you wear sometimes, and I fell in love with those glasses. Just fucking… couldn’t stop staring at them. I was thinking about you and about the night you left and I…” the words seemed to get lost somewhere in his throat, but he had this look on his face that mirrored painful confusion.

“Harry—“

“I want you to know that that was a really fucked up thing to do.”

That was it. After that, he left. He faced the other way and walked away from her. It wasn’t until he reached the door and opened it that she started following him.

“No!” She protested, “no, you don’t get to say that and walk away from me, you dick. You were the one who… who— just, you hurt me!”

That seemed to irk him (she’d wanted it to) because he turned again, stepping so close that she started backtracking, “I hurt you? I hurt you? You were the one who left!”

“Because you’re confusing as fuck!”

“What do you even—“ he shook his head, “you’re fucking quiet. You never tell me what you’re thinking or how you’re feeling and all at once, you burst at me. You never… you never say anything.”

“That’s what you wanted, Harry, so don’t tell me it’s only me when it was always about sex. You wanted the arrangement, you wanted booty calls, you wanted—“

“I wanted you to be you! The way you were when we were friends— so I tried to get you to open up, get closer to you, but you would never let me!”

Y/N was sure their friends could hear them from the living room, but she couldn’t find it in her to worry. “Why let myself get hurt when all this was was some stupid way to pass time? Cause that’s all it was, right? You call me, I call you— that’s fine, but it’s not worth exposing my secrets for.”

“Right, well I was under the impression things were going better but fine, if that’s what you think.”

She tutted. “Don’t do that. You told me you didn’t date, that we couldn’t start anything more and I never pushed you. I did exactly as you said.”

He blew out a breath, “things change.”

“I don’t know if you did, honestly.”

“I did.”

“You did?” She challenged, knowing it would blow up in her face. “What changed? Tell me exactly what changed, because it all felt the same to me! But I don’t know, maybe I missed your devastating declaration of love, or maybe I—“

“Alright, I love you, okay?” He was gripping his face in frustration, not nearly confident enough to look her in the eyes. In a more controlled tone, he repeated himself. “I love you.”

She scoffed. Out loud. It was followed by a laugh too, her scoff, and it reverberated through the room. Then she shook her head, and she couldn’t believe the audacity of him.

“Right, okay.”

He gave a sigh, tired. “Stop invalidating my feelings.”

His voice harbored just enough vulnerability for her to feel for him.

“You’re insecure about us, I get it. You were hurt, I understand. I didn’t want more when you did, I understand that too— but you weren’t the only one who got hurt in the end. It may have started out as a simple arrangement, but you know damn well things started changing months ago. I was showing you different sides of myself so that you would show the other, imperfect sides of you, but you never compromised with me. You wanted me to turn the lights off. You don’t even believe me when I say that I love you! Do you get how devastating it feels to tell someone that you love them and not only do they not feel the same way, they don’t even believe you could be capable of it?”

And she… she didn’t know what to say after that.

He was right, she supposed. She hadn’t considered his feelings in the matter.

“I do love you. I do. But if you think we’re a joke and we were never even real anyway, then fine.”

He’d started to distance himself, taking a few steps backwards from where she stood. She wanted to cry, but she didn’t want him to think she was trying to play victim— it was just what she did whenever she felt overwhelmed.

Y/N let him leave. Let him open the door and walk out, back to their friends, as she stood there alone. He was walking away from her.

And once the door closed, she burst into tears.

Her insecurities were mean, they were heavy on every part of her being right now.

She faced the front door leading outside and cried, trying to be as quiet as she could so nobody would hear her.

He did, though, or at least he had a feeling she was crying because he came back shortly after, almost like he’d been stood just outside regretting ever leaving. She could almost picture it, the door closing, their friends staring back at him with questioning glances— how he may have shut his eyes and released a deep breath before readying himself to get swallowed whole by the dramatics of it all over again. She was facing away from him, but her shoulders trembled in fear and he could kind of see her through the reflection of the door.

“Y/N.”

She shook her head.

“Y/N, turn around.” When she didn’t comply, Harry pulled her to the front of his chest, hesitant at first but becoming more confident as he felt her relax. His mouth was near her ear as he whispered, “I’m sorry, I didn’t want to make you cry.”

“Don’t, I’ve been horrible to you. And stupid.“

He shook his head. “It’s both of our faults.”

“I just… I always thought you wouldn’t like me as anything more than what we were and I wasn’t thinking.”

“I know,” he shushed her, pressing his lips to the side of her head and letting them linger there. “I know you didn’t mean to hurt me.”

He coaxed her around, never letting go.

“I’m so sorry.”

“I’m sorry too.”

She sniffled, “I forgive you.”

He chuckled against her forehead, his chest heaving against hers. Her lips were curling into a small smile as well. She couldn’t help but mirror him.

“It’s okay if you don’t feel the same way, I didn’t mean to… you know, say it like that in the middle of an argument. Shouldn’t have done that.”

She thought for a moment before settling on a subtle shrug. “Think I do though.”

He laughed, “you think?”

She moved to rest her chin on his chest, a glint in her wet eyes as she spoke, “if I say I know, will you date me for real?” She still sounded nervous.

His grin was wide. “I don’t know, don’t you think it’s a bit too soon for dating? I mean, I just told you I love you.”

The delight that sparked in her was all he’d been looking for. “I wouldn’t be surprised with how anti-relationships you are.”

Harry pinched her bum, rolling his eyes. “That was before I knew you think you may be in love me. Now I’m considering it.”

She looked extra cute because her eyes were still glossy and red, but she seemed happier, a smile completely molding her features. “Hm, well I guess I better know then.”

He leaned down enough to nudge her nose with his, “you probably should.”

“I love you,” she whispered, breath hitting his lips. “I know I do.”

He kissed her then, pulling her impossibly close. “Again,” he’d said, and she obeyed. He gave her two short kisses, mumbling, “again” over and over again until he had his fill.

He couldn’t resist the last finishing kiss, lasting just a few seconds longer than the other ones. “Let’s go home.”

—

the end!

#harry styles fanfiction #harry styles angst #harry styles x you #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fan fiction #harry styles one shot #harry styles fic #harry styles #harry styles fluff #harry styles concept #famous!harry #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n

1K notes · View notes

bunnylovesani · 1 year ago

Text

A Birthday Affair

Summary: It's your birthday and your best friend is making you a cake! Too bad she's left you home alone with her boyfriend, Anakin. She should've known you two had a thing for each other, right?

Content warnings: cheating, p in v sex, creampie, daddy kink

WC: 2.6k

“Alright guys, there’s only one shop that sells the buttercream we need and it’s way at the other end of town.” Padme shouts tiredly, grabbing her coat by the door. “Could’ve sworn I’d already picked some up…but anything for the birthday girl. I might be a while so make sure you keep an eye on the cake in the oven!”

“We’re not that incompetent, Padme.” Anakin rolls his eyes.

“Of course, we got it!” You answer as she leaves and turn to face Anakin. “You should really be nicer to her.”

“I’m plenty nice.” He responds. “And you’re the birthday girl, it’s you I need to be nice to.”

“But she’s your girlfriend. You’re obligated to be nice to her all year round.” You put the empty batter bowl into the sink as Anakin stares at you across the kitchen, leaning against the countertops.

“I’m about as nice to her as she is to me.” He murmurs and you look back in confusion. Were they having issues you didn’t know about?

“That couldn’t be further from the truth, Padme is the perfect girlfriend and you-“ You paused, looking at him up and down with a light scowl. “-well you’re you.”

“Ah, so you think I’m not good enough for her? How cliche.” He gives you a look of displeasure. “And what is it that makes me so unworthy of her company?”

“You’re not bad per se, you’re just…” You sigh, struggling to put your thoughts into words. “Look at it this way- Padme is one of those rare people. She manages to balance being successful and beautiful with somehow being humble and kind- I know for a fact she wakes up every morning to make you breakfast- and she does things like drive all over the city looking for a specific frosting for her best friend. That’s just the kind of person she is.” You ramble on, walking around the kitchen as Anakin stares at you in fascination.

“And then there’s you, who’s forgotten every anniversary and has been fired from every job because of his inability to control his temper. You see what I’m getting at?”

Anakin furrows his thick brows as he processes what you’re saying and you think he might get mad at you for a second but to your relief, he cracks a bright smile.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m just as much of a mess as you are. Just as unworthy.“ You laugh and a puzzling smirk crosses his face.

“So you’re saying I should be with someone better suited for me?”

“Yes, exactly.”

“Someone like…you?” He raises an eyebrow.

You chuckle nervously and take a step back, suddenly aware of how close he’d gotten.

“Obviously not. I-I didn’t mean to make it sound like that.” Stuttering, you try to move away from him but he doesn’t budge, tall figure towering over you. That stupid smirk he has plastered over his face increases your heart rate tenfold.

“What’s the matter, sweetheart? Have I got you flustered?” He sneers.

“Stop playing around.” You push him away by his chest and escape to the sofa, slumping down it with a huff.

“Padme told me about the little crush you had on me.” He stands behind you and you refuse to face him, consumed with embarrassment.

“Crush is too strong of a word for what that was.” You feel your cheeks burning up at the memory; when you first met Anakin at that bar last Christmas, you’ll admit you initially wanted him all to yourself. But what were you supposed to do when Padme got to him first? You can’t believe she told him.

“So you don’t find me attractive anymore?” He asks in that provocative tone of his.

“The outer shell is fine but the inside could do with a little work.” You feign confidence, avoiding the question. To be truthful, you found him incredibly attractive. So much so that you actively avoided him because you felt yourself folding under pressure anytime he was near.

“Can I let you in on a little secret?” He asked quietly, taking a seat on the footstool across the sofa.

“No, but I sense you’re going to anyway.” You brace yourself.

“That night I saw you and Padme playing pool at the bar.” He begins. “I wanted to approach you, not her.”

Your breath hitches in your throat.

“But she came up to me first and when I asked her who her friend was, she told me you weren’t interested…in men.” Your mouth widens as his words linger in the air.

“I-I don’t know what to say.” You stutter, feeling a small sense of betrayal run through you. “I don’t know why she’d do that.”

“Because she knew she wouldn’t stand a chance otherwise.” He gets up to sit next to you and you tense up at his knee lightly brushing past yours.

“I thought you were a lesbian for half the time I’ve known you- until you started dating that loser a few months ago and Padme had to come clean. She thought I’d find it funny.” He curls his lip in disgust.

“And did you?”

“No.” He responds, steely eyes staring right through you. “I’m still mad about it.”

“Anakin…” You cautiously murmur, sensing the direction this could so easily take.

“I’m just saying, remember that next time you want to rant about how great she is. If it wasn’t for her deceit, it could’ve been us together.” He rests his hand on your leg but you swiftly brush it off.

“But it’s not. And it never will be. You’ll always either be her boyfriend or her ex. Either way, you’re off limits.” You try to assert some boundaries before your self-control completely slips away from you.

“And if it weren’t for these limits?” He reaches his hand up, tucking your hair behind your ear.

“Oh God, the cake! Must go and check on the cake.” You get up, trying to escape his grasp but he pushes you back down.

“I said what if it weren’t for those limits?” He repeats sternly and you can’t help but fixate on his rosy pink lips. You’d always wondered how they’d feel pressed up against yours.

“In another galaxy where you’d never met her-“ You sigh, walls crumbling down. “then I’d be yours.”

“Is that what you want?” His husky voice mutters, barely above a whisper.

“It doesn’t matter because this isn’t another galaxy. This is reality.” You shuffle back a little in an attempt to impose some distance between you.

“Fuck reality. I want you.” He pulls you in and you’re hit with a wave of warmth radiating off his firm body.

“Anakin, no. Padme is my best friend! I’m not a homewrecker.” You cry out, unsure whether you’re trying to convince him or yourself.

“You can’t wreck something that’s already fallen apart. I don’t care about her— I don’t care about any of it anymore. For God’s sake, I even hid the damn buttercream because I wanted her to leave us alone for a while.” Your mouth gapes open at his revelation.

“I knew it!” You point your finger at him but he grabs you by the wrist and pulls you onto him, faces barely an inch apart.

“I need you. In every way possible.” His voice is so breathy it makes you squeeze your thighs together.

“Ugh, Ani I-“

“Do you want me as much as I want you? Please, put me out of my misery.” He whines and you bite your lip over the beautiful desperation in his words.

“Of course I want you, I’ve always wanted you.” The words barely leave your mouth before he grabs your face with both hands and kisses you sloppily, grip on your jaw a little too strong. He has you gasping for air, stubbornly holding onto you like it was the last kiss he’d ever have.

“Don’t you worry about her, I’ll take care of everything.” He rubs your cheek with his thumb comfortingly and you feel all your worries melt away; he was here, he would fix it all.

“I’ve thought about this for so long.” You cry, pawing at him. The sense of elation you felt at finally being able to touch him, inhale him, taste him- after an eternity of forcing every feeling down. You did it all out of respect for Padme, out of respect for Ani who chose her- but now that you’d learned the truth, restraint flew out the window. He should’ve been yours- he is yours.

“Lie down for me sweetheart, I wanna see my pretty girl.” He pushes you down onto the sofa and inches your skirt down, admiring your pretty pink panties. “You wear these just for me?” You nod frantically- it’s true, you wore everything for him. Your best underwear, your prettiest lipstick, your shortest little skirts, it was all for him. He pushes your top up slowly, messy kisses being planted all over your tummy until he reaches your perky tits.

“Is there a reason you’re not wearing a bra, young lady?” He scolds you playfully.

“Mhm, it’s fun watching you fight the urge to stare at the way they bounce and jiggle.”

“You noticed that, huh?” You giggle at his honesty as he rips your top off, laughter instantly replaced with breathy moans as he squeezes your boobs harshly, taking turns sucking on the nipples.

“Best pair of tits I’ve seen in my life.” He mutters into your chest as he continues to kiss and lick all over, making you writhe underneath him.

“Ani, please.” You buck your hips up towards him, desperately needing more. “Hurry, we don’t know when she’ll be home.”

“Then it’s a good thing the door bolts shut from the inside.” He grins, hands trailing down between your thighs.

“Ani, no! We can’t lock her out, what would she think?”

“I don’t care, all I know is if I don’t get enough of this sweet pussy, I’m gonna lose my mind.” He groans as he hooks his arms under your legs and pulls you down, pulling your panties to the side. You bashfully cover your face with your hands as he rubs your clit with his thumb and when you peek through your fingers, you see him biting his lip and curving his eyebrows into a pitiful swoop. Just as you think it can’t get better, he lowers his boxers and frees his cock, heavy length slapping against his stomach. Not wanting to inflate his already engorged ego, you try not to look shocked- but he sees right through you.

“You tryin’ to make me feel bad, sweetie? No problem, I’ll have you squealing in a minute anyway.” He confidently asserts and you feel him rubbing his tip along your soaking folds; the anticipation alone is enough to make you throw your head back.

With one sudden thrust, he pushes himself into your tight pussy and you sink your teeth into the pillow beside you to conceal some of the noise. Reaching forward and grabbing it from you, he tosses it aside and grabs you by the jaw.

“I want to hear every little sound you make. Raw and unmuted.” He growls.

“B-but someone might hear-“

“I don’t give a fuck.” He asserts aggressively. “Let them hear. They might as well start getting used to it now.” You moan at his depraved words, drool forming around your lips.

“If you want something in your mouth that bad, here.” He offers you his fingers- which you accept gratefully, sucking and biting on them to your heart’s content. Just as you’ve adjusted, he slides the rest of his cock in- filling you so deeply you question how it’s even possible. The mewling that proceeds boosts Anakin’s ego more than is healthy; you pant and whine so fervently that you look like you’re on the verge of passing out. Your pupils are dilated, your hair messed up, your thighs dampened with arousal and sweat.

“Ani, mm fuck- fill me up, please!” You dig your fingernails into his back as he lowers himself to kiss your wet lips, silencing your sobs and pleading if only for a moment.

“You want my cum, sweetheart? You wanna be daddy’s cum slut, hm? Let me hear you say it.” His strokes get deeper and sloppier as he hurtles his way to his release.

“Yes daddy, yes! I wanna be your cum slut so bad, it’s the only thing I want.” You ramble, words barely audible over the loud sounds of smacking and squelching.

“I could never say no to you.” He whispers, head tucked into the crook of your neck planting open-mouth kisses.

“I need it, need it noww.” You whine, tits bouncing into circles as he roughly pounds into you, strong hand maintaining a firm grip on your hip as he rams himself into you one last time: cum spilling from his tender cock and filling you up to the brim. Pulling out, the sensation of his cum dribbling out of you doubled with his thumb circling your clit sends you over the edge, orgasm washing over you like a tsunami. He rests his head on your chest as you both catch your breath, running your fingers through his hair.

“I’m gonna leave her.” He softly speaks. “I’m leaving and I’m telling her about us.”

Your heart seizes in both panic and excitement. There’s an us?

The familiar thud of footsteps in the hallway has you both scrambling to get dressed- you pull your top down and your skirt back on but can’t find your frilly panties anywhere. Anakin just about finishes zipping up his jeans when Padme walks in to the sight of her very flustered-looking best friend and boyfriend, sitting oddly far apart in unnatural positions on the couch.

“Hey guys, I had to check several different stores but I finally found the right buttercream, what have you- wait, do I smell something burning?”

Fuck, you forgot the cake.

Running over to the oven, she scrambles to pull out the smoking tray. Despair takes over her face when she sees the round crust, black as cinder.

“How did you forget?! What were you doing?” She yells, throwing the ashes straight into the bin and frowning at you.

“Nothing, Padme. We just got carried away chatting is all. ‘m really sorry.” You walk over to join her in the kitchen but start to feel Ani’s seed leaking out of your stretched-out hole and dribbling down your thighs. Noticing the glistening sticky wetness, Anakin rushes over in front of you to distract Padme.

“It was my fault, I said I’d keep track of time and I didn’t.” He explains, subtly tossing a kitchen towel your way.

“Classic Anakin, honestly a monkey would have better time management.” She hisses, barging past him and opening windows to let the smoke out. “No wonder you can’t keep a job.” He takes a shaky breath and you can see how hard he’s trying to restrain himself.

“Not now.” You think, giving him a knowing glare and he nods reluctantly. Padme stomps over to the bathroom and you quickly wipe the cummy mess off your thighs, giggling a little at the excitement of sneaking around. Anakin rushes over and gives you a feverish kiss, whispering in your ear “She goes to bed early, you know.”

Maybe you wouldn’t tell her just yet.

@crazy4hotmen @erinkeifer @mortalheartache @arzua10

Part 2 here

#hayden christensen #star wars fanfiction #anakin skywalker fanfiction #anakin skywalker smut #anakin x reader #anakin fanfiction #anakin x you #star wars smut #sam monroe #hayden christensen x reader #anakin skywalker #star wars prequels #darth vader #padme amidala #sw prequels

1K notes · View notes

earlysunshines · 7 months ago

Text

asap baby

kim minji x fem!reader ; fluff

synopsis: hanni and danielle spent months getting you and minji together only to find out you haven't kissed once

warnings: sixth member reader ; they makeout i GUESS muahaha very small tho very short ; if you have a sweet tooth you'll love this one I hope ; loser gf minji I fear (my type) ; not proofread

a/n: LOSER GF!!! muahahahaha also i wrote this in one sitting what

not many things make kim minji weak in the knees, she’s very good at keeping her composure. however, as soon as you were put into her life, all of that was thrown out the window.

you’ve been minji’s member for over a year. you’ve also been dating kim minji, the prettiest most gorgeous girl you’ve ever met for nearly two months now–all thanks to hanni and danielle, your other fellow members.

as happy as they were to get you two together, it was almost dreadful to witness the two of you together. it wasn’t necessarily awkward, but time alone with minji was limited, and you two were stupidly shy and giddy when the girls were around you. the two of you still act like how you did while you were crushing on each other – before the confession – and it’s not entertaining.

you’re much more outgoing and open about your feelings, however, but you’re willing to be patient for minj–even if that means her taking forever to initiate things and show you just how in love she is other than using acts of service and gift giving.

it isn’t until hanni and danielle bug you to death on your whole relationship, itching for more out of the two of you.

–

hanni and danielle sit in front of you, petrified.

“you’re telling me, the most you’ve done is held hands with her and kiss her on the cheek?” danielle gasps, her brows creasing.

you shake your head, blushing. “okay, well, i’ve kissed her hand and forehead too–”

“bro, you haven’t kissed her? you’ve been dating for like, almost two months are you fucking kidding me?”

putting up your hands in defense, you begin, “hey! she’s… shy… i think about kissing her and shit like that all the time but… i just… you know.”

“oh y/n, you haven’t even tried to initiate it? i know her, she definitely wants to kiss you too.”

“well,” you start, crossing your arms. “kissing isn’t the most important part of a relationship. she makes sure i’m healthy and we sleep in the same bed and i like her and care for her and–”

“well yeah you’re right but we didn’t spend five months listening and watching you two drool over each other just for you to end up together and act like an awkward couple in the 90s!”

“hey! we’re not! stop that!” you roll your eyes, then flop onto your bed from where you sit. picking up your phone, you gaze at the picture of your girlfriend on your screen. “i just– we kind of agreed to take it slow.”

“take it slow my ass man.”

“well, everytime i’ve tried to initiate things more… you know, couple like… we always get interrupted! i mean i’ve tried to kiss her but i swear hyein and haerin have some superpower that lets them know when one of us tries to and they end up walking in and ugh!”

you weren’t lying, really. most attempts at trying to be affectionate and bolder were often interrupted.

after two weeks of going out with minji, spending nights together and cuddling as you talked about who knows what, you finally had the chance to be home alone. with everyone's schedules piled up, this rare moment of solitude was perfect.

minji had her arm around you as you both watched a movie, deciding to spend your last hour together curled up beside each other. your thumb gently grazed her hand repeatedly, making her smile and lean her head into you a bit more. it was calming, just being there beside her. the warmth of her presence was comforting, filling you with a sense of peace.

halfway into the movie, you turn to kiss her jawline. she tilts her head slightly, allowing you better access, her smile widening. the simple act feels intimate and precious, a quiet affirmation of the more romantic bond that took months of (mostly danielle and hanni’s) work to happen.

her skin is warm and soft against your lips, sending a flutter through your chest. you savor the moment, wishing it could last forever.

“that tickles, you know.”

“mm, but you’re so cute.”

“you’re so corny,” she says, blushing. she looks at you more closely, tilting her head. “is that my t-shirt?”

“too early to do that?”

minji shakes her head. “nah, you look cute.”

her lips turn up in a smile, and you mirror her. “now look who’s corny.”

“oh, shut up, you’re literally blushing.”

“that’s only because the girl in front of me looks so good right now.” you gently push her glasses up so they sit on the crown of her head. the movie in the background dissolves into white noise, and minji’s breath hitches. your eyes dart down to her lips, making you subtly bite the inside of your own. “so good, kim minji.”

she leans in closer, the warmth of her breath mingling with yours. the moment feels suspended in time, the anticipation building. you can see the sparkle in her eyes, feel the rapid beating of her heart through the closeness of your bodies. everything about her draws you in, making you smirk as your head tilts.

just as your lips are about to touch, you hear the door swing open and a pair of voices fill the air. you and minji quickly part, hearts racing. minji chokes on nothing, coughing as hyein walks into the living room and plops down on the couch between the two of you.

"hey, what's up?" hyein asks, oblivious to the moment she just interrupted. “what movie? no way you’re watching the mario movie without me!”

you exchange a quick, knowing glance with minji, both of you struggling to suppress smiles and calm your racing hearts.

“sorry…” you mumble, turning to hyein and giving her an apologetic smile. “you’ve already watched this movie like three times!”

“still! i can’t believe you left me out…”

minji scoffs playfully, smiling at the two of you. she raises her brows at the youngest member. “you literally had a shoot, it’s not like we can facetime you in the middle of it.”

if that were even possible, hyein would’ve had to witness everything that had happened before. you and minji preferred things to be less… out there. besides, hyein didn’t even know the two of you were more than just members that had gotten super close.

“hey, let’s watch it the next time we’re both free then!” you offer.

“yes for sure! anyway, i’m going to go change”

hyein walks off, leaving you and minji a space away from each other. minji stands up and puts her hand out, you grab it with a teasing smile. your girlfriend rolls her eyes at you and starts to lead you to the room you two share.

the two of you don’t really speak on the incident.

–

it takes a bit of time, a few weeks after the first incident to be exact, before you get the confidence to try again.

the rest of the members and your performance manager have gathered outside to recharge and grab water, leaving the two of you alone. minji sits next to you on the floor of the practice room against the mirror, both of you sweaty from practice.

minji is on her phone, her breath still a bit heavy from the past thirty minutes of repeating and repeating several moves until they were perfect. your eyes soften at the sight of her, knowing how hard-working and passionate she is about being an idol. she's been your main motivation ever since you both were trainees, and the way she caught your eye was also a factor.

you admire her dedication, the way she pours her heart into every dance move and every note she sings. the sweat on her forehead and the tired yet determined look in her eyes only make her more endearing to you. the room is quiet except for your breathing, the air thick with the lingering energy of your intense practice.

gathering your courage, you inch a little closer to her. your heart races, but the desire to share a tender moment with her pushes you forward. you reach out and push away some of the hair framing her face, which makes her turn over to look at you. her eyes smile before her lips do, making you fold.

“tired?” you ask.

“very.” minji admits, putting her phone down and giving you all of her attention. “you’re sweating a lot, you must be too?”

“it’s whatever.” you sigh, leaning against the mirror. you stare at your girlfriend, her eyes drill right back into yours before a smirk plays on her lips.

“you like what you see?”

“my sweaty girlfriend?” you chuckle and push her arm, then bite your lip not-so-subtly. “for sure.”

minji smiles, gums showing a bit. she places her hand on your knee, letting her fingers run up and down your skin. “you’re a tease.”

“kim minji, you look so kissable right now.” the words flow out of your mouth, pausing minji in her place.

she clenches her jaw before scooting closer to you, her hand moving from your knee to your arm and under the short sleeve covering your bicep. her touch is warm, sending a shiver up your spine.

without saying a word, she leans in, her eyes locking onto yours. the moment hangs in the air, charged with anticipation.

“yeah? what are you going to do about it l/n y/n?”

you scoff lightheartedly before leaning closer, time seems to slow down as you move your hand to caress her jawline softly. “wouldn’t you like to know.” you whisper just centimeters away from her lips.

both of your eyes close and just as you begin to close the distance, a group of girls bursts into the room.

you and minji part suddenly, pushing each other away as your cheeks turn crimson. the interruption is jarring, and you can feel the heat rising to your face, matching the flush on minji’s cheeks. the lively chatter and laughter of the group fill the room, making it impossible to continue the moment. you exchange a quick, embarrassed glance with minji, both of you silently lamenting the lost opportunity.

haerin stares at the two of you on the floor as if a meteor had just landed between you, causing both of you to jump apart. there’s now three feet of awkward space between the two of you, and haerin simply tilts her head.

“minji, y/n, you didn’t get water?” haerin asks, her voice tinged with curiosity.

“not... um, thirsty,” you manage to say, feeling the heat of embarrassment still lingering. minji nods in agreement, her gaze darting away briefly.

haerin’s expression remains unreadable as she continues to observe the two of you, her silence adding to the awkwardness that hangs in the air.

your girlfriend jumps up with energy, clapping her hands and beaming, “alright! let’s continue!” which makes you chuckle. minji looks back at you and you mouth, good save, before sticking your tongue out at her.

–

“i told you we almost kissed! we just... every time i want to and we get close, it gets ruined.”

danielle frowns sympathetically, feeling bad after hearing your frustration. hanni shakes her head, then crosses her arms and nudges danielle closer to her.

“dude, just kiss her,” hanni sighs, then turns to danielle, who looks utterly confused. “like this.”

“woah, wait–”

hanni smiles mischievously at you, then fixes danielle with a serious gaze. “just put your hand on her shoulder like this—” she squeezes danielle's deltoid, making her gasp in surprise. “—then look her in the eye.” they lock eyes, and danielle can’t help but smirk at the absurdity of the situation, struggling to keep a straight face. you chuckle, thoroughly amused by their impromptu demonstration.

“then say whatever lovey-dovey shit and lean in, mmm~” hanni hums playfully, puckering her lips for effect.

danielle smirks back, leaning in slightly and catching hanni off guard. hanni jumps back dramatically, looking at danielle with mock horror as danielle bursts into laughter. you join in, unable to contain your amusement at the whole scene unfolding before you.

“oh, come on, hanni pham~ we have to give her a demonstration!”

“gross!” hanni sticks her tongue out at dani, who’s laughing louder now. “i didn’t think you’d actually play along!”

“don’t be shy!”

“i hate you.”

you smile at the two, rolling your eyes playfully before leaning back and hugging your pillow again.

the thought of minji, right before she’s about to kiss you, fills your mind with warmth. memories of those moments flash before you, making you smile. her lips look soft, and you've imagined how they would feel against yours countless times. they must be heaven, and you can't wait to experience it for real. you don’t want this to just be a daydream you have everyday anymore.

kissing minji is something special, something that has to be perfect. you want it to be a moment you both cherish, not hurried or awkward like hanni's demonstration. you want to approach her with tenderness and sincerity, making sure every detail is just right. it's a moment you've been waiting for, and you want to make it unforgettable for both of you.

“ugh, this is so frustrating.” you sigh, collapsing onto hanni’s thigh.”

danielle thinks to herself, then lights up. “wait, you’ve always been the one to start it, right?”

“i guess?”

“just find a way for minji to do it instead then.”

“and how will i do that?”

"just use your ways, i don't want to think about how i'd get minji to kiss me. that's gross…" hanni interjects, prompting you to push her head lightly.

"okay, minji is not gross, and she’s my lovely girlfriend that i want to kiss very much, thank you." you defend minji with a playful smile, while hanni pretends to gag, earning chuckles from you and danielle.

you start to ponder danielle’s suggestion seriously. how could you make a move on minji? she’s confident on camera when it comes to variety shows, livestreams, or anything of that sort, even playing along with fangirls’ comments. but she’s completely different when it comes to you, her girlfriend, and always reserved when it comes to initiating intimacy. she's comfortable with cuddles and the occasional kiss on the cheek, but you want more.

as you think about it, a plan starts to form in your mind. you recall how she responds to your touch, the way her eyes soften when you compliment her, and how she leans into your affection–but this is all behind closed doors

every nuance of minji's personality and her vulnerabilities flood your mind, and they all seem to revolve around your relationship. you muse over the idea of teasing her playfully to elicit a more spontaneous reaction—like kissing you.

as you think about the dynamics between you, a plan starts to take shape in your mind.

–

the notification on your phone alerts you that minji is live, and since you're done with everything you need to do and nearby, you might as well surprise her.

you stare at the screen for a moment, admiring your girlfriend. she's wearing the leather jacket you bought her before you started dating, a white t-shirt underneath, a cap perched on her head, and the glasses that always make her look even cuter.

"ugh, you're going to be the death of me," you mutter quietly to yourself as you gaze at her image. gathering your courage, you knock on the door to the room she's in. you watch as she jumps in her seat, clearly startled by the sudden interruption.

"hello? who is it?" minji calls out, her voice tinged with curiosity. "hanni, is that you?"

you chuckle softly, turning off your phone and deciding to play along. slowly, you open the door just a crack, peering in with only the top half of your head visible. minji's eyes widen in surprise, and a bright smile instantly lights up her face, showing her gums and top teeth.

“y/n!” minji rolls her chair to the door and opens it fully, grabbing your hand as you step inside. “what are you doing here?”

“i got a notification from phoning and wanted to see you.” you grin, knowing her cheeks are warming up since the live is still going. “i have squid crackers.”

minji pulls a chair beside the two of you and pats it down so you can sit. “yum, let’s eat!”

“okay, okay.”

the live continues on with the two of you bickering over small things, arguing over vegetables and you trying to convince her that they won’t kill her. the comments roll quickly, something tells you that most of the live will be clipped and shared online, not that you mind.

nearing the end of the livestream, you and minji sit close together, your arms brushing against each other as you read through the comments. the phone sits on the desk in front of you, capturing your interactions with your fans.

underneath the desk, where the phone is positioned, minji taps your knee. you subtly glance down and see her hand open, silently motioning for you to hold it. a smile spreads across your face as you turn towards her, interlocking your fingers with hers. you exchange a brief, affectionate look before turning back to the camera, continuing to hold hands as you engage with the comments and wrap up the livestream.

you move your head closer to the screen to glimpse at a few comments, most of them complimenting minji with her glasses on and tousled hair. your lips turn up and you agree, “yeah, the comments are right.”

“what do they say?”

“that you look…” you read a certain comment that makes your nose scrunch as you laugh. “they're saying you look… scrumptious?”

minji chuckles, shaking her head. “strange.”

you lean back in your chair and keep your eyes focused on minji, the whole time as she reads through more comments, eyeing her like a meal. yeah, the comments have a point.

your girlfriend tries to maintain composure as she notices you eyeing her up and down, your tongue poking the inside of your cheek in a playful manner. she turns to meet your gaze, and all you do is smirk at her, glancing down at her lips for a fleeting moment before locking eyes with her again.

kim minji can stay sane for the cameras, she has to.

even when you look at her like that, and in her hoodie.

“minji please be my girlfriend…” minji reads out quietly, making you sit up and move to look at the screen yourself.

“absolutely not.” you retort, bringing minji in closer by the arm. “she’s off limits.”

minji looks at you, trying her absolute best to keep her cool and playing off her nerves with a laugh. “says who?”

“me.” you mumble, turning to face her.

the livestream captures the entire scene: you grinning mischievously at minji, playfully holding onto her arm, clearly enjoying teasing her. she visibly folds a bit internally, swallowing lightly as she glances over at the rapidly scrolling chat. sensing the attention, minji gently unlinks your arms and ruffles your hair, pushing your chair back with a playful eye-roll as a blush spreads across her cheeks.

"okay, that's enough from you, y/n," minji sighs, feigning exasperation but unable to hide her smile. she addresses the screen, her voice warm despite her playful annoyance. "bye bye everyone, stay safe and see you next time!" with that, she ends the livestream as fast as she can, placing the phone down on the table.

as the screen goes dark, you exchange a knowing look with minji, both of you aware of how bold you were.

minji pulls your chair toward her, stopping you in your place right when your faces are a hand’s length apart.

“what was that y/n?” she questions you, narrowing her eyes.

you giggle. “what do you mean?”

“you know what i– ugh, we’re going to be clipped and posted and–”

“and you’ll be watching over it all?”

minji gazes at you in disbelief, her breath catching slightly as she meets your gaze. you return her look, peering at her through lowered eyelashes, a subtle smile playing on your lips. the air between you two is thick with tension, the intensity of the moment palpable.

you begin to stand up, stretching your arms out as you make your way towards the door. however, before you can take another step, your wrist is gently but firmly pulled back. you turn around, surprised, to see minji still seated in her chair, her eyes fixed you, her pupils dilated.

her cap and glasses are taken off before she stands up and meets your level, her hand travels to your waist.

“was this on purpose?”

“what was?”

"don't make me work for it," minji warns softly, her head tilting ever so slightly to the side. her eyes linger on yours for a moment before trailing down to your lips. you feel a rush of anticipation as you lick them, waiting eagerly to see what she’s planning to do next.

“someone is eager, huh?”

“shut up.” is the last thing minji says before her lips meet yours, finally.

her other hand is on the base of your neck, lightly adding pressure as she kisses you. her lips are as soft as they look, and they feel even better against your lips than anywhere else.

both of you pull away, then minji looks at you hesitantly. “is this okay?”

“fucking finally,” you sigh right before cupping both her cheeks and kissing her again.

minji's grip on you tightens, her touch indicating the need to hold onto you as the intensity of the moment deepens. the scent of peach and jasmine surrounds you, adding to the dreamlike atmosphere. your lips feel like a wish that no genie could ever grant, so hazy and perfect in this moment. as you slide your hands into her hair, the moment feels surreal, as if you're both caught up in a beautiful dream.

she shifts the two of you over towards the small couch in the corner, settling you down and hovering over you. she catches you smiling at her as your thumbs rub her cheeks lightly.

“you’re so cute minji.”

“stop that.”

“are you flustered? aw look at you–” she cuts your teasing off with a kiss, both of you smiling into it. you want this to last forever, just you and minji together, kissing, her lips on yours, hand in your hair and the other trailing down your torso – just the two of you in the moment and nothing else.

your desire is rejected when you hear a squeal, making minji fumble and fall on top of you, her face meeting the base of your neck.

“minji? y/n? what–”

hyein.

your girlfriend gets up, crawling away from you, her face beet red and visibly flustered. she meets the youngest member with a complete lack of composure, while you sit up and watch everything unfold.

“w-why didn’t you knock?” minji scolds her, immediately looking away from hyein because she cannot look her in the eye after she had walked in on both of you.

“are you two together? how long has this been going on? oh my god… why did no one tell me?”

“hyein, listen.”

“i knew something was up.” she facepalms, then looks at you. “sleeping in the same room… being alone together so much– i just though you guys were really close until i caught minji kissing your hand.”

your eyes widen. “what? when?”

“you guys were in the kitchen together cooking and ugh it all adds up…”

minji looks at you and silently pleads for help, prompting you to get up and stand next to your lover. hyein looks at the two of you expectantly, raising her brows as you two shrink under her.

“can we please talk about this with everyone else? they can help sort this out.” you suggest, which only feeds the flame (lee hyein).

“everyone else but me knew this?” she says in shock, then pouts at the two of you. “c’mon! why did you keep the juiciest stuff away from me!”

“because! you’re young! and besides, haerin doesn’t know either.” you desperately try to defend yourself, but none of your words get through her head – or maybe they do and she’s too shaken up to process it.

you and minji look at each other, blushes taking over your faces like a tsunami.

a small breath leaves your lips; hyein had caught you making out with your girlfriend and now you both have to sit her down and give her a little talk as if you were two parents.

but at least you got to kiss your girlfriend after what had felt like forever, so maybe it was worth it in the end.

(plus, that look on minji’s face – yeah, maybe it was slightly worth it even if the kisses got cut short.)

#kim minji x reader #minji x reader #newjeans x reader #newjeans minji #kpop x reader #new jeans x reader

926 notes · View notes

hotshotsxyz · 3 months ago

Note

Hiii Abbie 💕💕💕

Buddie + “ i didn’t know where else to go. “

-❤️🪐

(buddie) (1.5k) eddie's pov before and after the events of this fic written for the same prompt! (technically i only used the line in the first one but oh well lol)

cw: vague description of a very bad car accident

Eddie doesn’t make a habit of watching the news. It’s depressing as hell, he runs the risk of seeing Taylor fucking Kelly on his TV, and if something he actually needs to know about is going on, he’ll hear it from Buck some time in the next few days anyway. All that to say, Eddie isn’t watching the news; he’s just flipping through the channels.

“Pick me, choose me!” Meredith Grey is saying in a rerun of Grey’s Anatomy.

click

“—low pressure system moving in from the north,” a meteorologist says on The Weather Channel.

click

“Alright boys, saddle up!” says the captain on that crappy network firefighter show.

click

“—multi-car pile-up on the 405. It’s unclear if—”

click

“—raw dough. It’s such a shame—”

click

“—urging drivers to avoid—”

click

“—looking for a loft in the city, while Jennifer would prefer—”

click

“—unclear if there are any survivors of the initial crash.”

Eddie puts the remote down. He doesn’t make a habit of watching the news, but every once in a while, something catches his attention.

The image on the screen is an aerial shot of a massive, burning multicar pile-up. The 136 is on scene, but they can’t have been there long if the size and ferocity of the fire is anything to go by.

“—compounded by the explosion of a tanker carrying gasoline—”

Eddie winces. They’re going to be there all night if they don’t get more companies on scene. He reaches for the remote at the same time as the shot switches from the aerial to a reporter on the ground. She’s not what stops him from changing the channel. The crushed and smoldering Jeep behind her is.

And it’s—there’ve got to be a thousand silver Jeeps in Los Angeles. And Buck wouldn’t—why would he even be on the 405? So obviously it’s not Buck’s Jeep, even if it is the same color and probably year. It’s just a shitty little coincidence.

An unpleasant pressure begins to build in Eddie’s chest.

He’ll just—it’s not late. He doesn’t even have to tell Buck why he’s calling. Eddie scoops his phone off the table, navigates to his favorites, and taps Buck’s name. The call goes straight to voicemail. Eddie frowns and taps his name again. He gets the same result.

“—and rescue is under way, but I’m being told that until the fire is contained—”

Buck’s phone is dead, probably. Or—or he took Jee to that movie he was talking about so he had to turn it off. That’s—he’s sure that’s it. Eddie rubs at his sternum and stands. He’s just… feeling a little paranoid.

He calls Maddie. She answers on the second ring.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Maddie,” Eddie says, brushing a hand across the back of his neck. “It’s Eddie.”

“Uh, hey,” Maddie says. “Is everything okay?”

Eddie winces. “Yeah, I think so. I was just wondering if you’ve talked to Buck tonight.” He’s being ridiculous. Buck’s fine.

“No,” Maddie says, obvious confusion in her tone. “Why, did something happen?”

“No, no,” Eddie says. “I just haven’t been able to get ahold of him.”

Maddie hums thoughtfully. “He might’ve had a dental appointment earlier,” she says.

“Okay, thanks,” Eddie says. “I’ll probably just swing by the loft then.” There’s a pit in his stomach. Buck’s fine. At worst he has a cavity or two. He’s fine.

“Oh!” Maddie exclaims. “Hold on, let me check his location; I’ll save you the trip if he’s not there.”

Eddie pinches the bridge of his nose. Duh. He has Buck’s location too. He didn’t even need to bother Maddie with—

“Nope, sorry,” she says.

Eddie takes a breath. He’s fine. Buck’s fine. “Maddie,” he says slowly, “where is he?”

“Um, as of twenty-eight minutes ago, looks like he was driving through Culver City, on the 405, I think,” she replies. “Eddie, what’s going on?”

“Oh god,” he breathes. He can feel the blood draining from his face.

“Eddie?” Maddie asks. She’s starting to sound worried.

On the TV, the camera zooms in and pans across the wreckage. It reaches the Jeep. Hanging from the rearview mirror is a bigfoot air freshener that looks exactly like the one Chimney gave him as a joke a few months ago. It’s—

It’s Buck’s Jeep. He’s fine. He has to be fine.

“—understand that search and rescue efforts are underway, but as of right now, no additional survivors have been located.”

He could be dead.

Eddie’s knees give out beneath him. He lands heavily on the couch.

“Don’t turn on the news,” he says.

“What? Why?” Maddie asks.

“There was an accident on the 405,” Eddie replies mechanically. “I think it might be bad.”

On the other end of the line, Maddie sucks in a sharp breath. “Eddie—”

“It’s his Jeep,” Eddie says.

He’s okay.

He has to be okay.

He’s not okay.

He could be dead.

“I have to call Bobby,” Eddie realizes aloud. “He can—he can get in touch with IC.”

“Okay,” Maddie says shakily. “Okay. I’m going to call Sue. Maybe she—” Maddie cuts herself off with something like a gasp.

“I’ll call you when—” if “—I get ahold of him,” Eddie promises.

“Same,” Maddie replies.

They end the call without a goodbye.

Eddie tries Buck again, just in case. He doesn’t answer.

He can’t—

Buck has to be okay.

He has to.

Eddie takes a steeling breath and calls Bobby.

…

Eddie’s crawling out of his skin. The captain of the 136 has him on hold, and that’s already more than he’s obligated to do but—

But it’s Buck and Eddie’s fucking terrified.

The longer he waits, the farther afield his imagination goes.

He’s got a broken leg and a concussion; they’re taking him to Cedars-Sinai.

He wasn’t conscious when we found him. They’re airlifting him to UCLA.

I’m sorry, Diaz. He was DOA.

Eddie paces back and forth and tugs at his hair. He needs to do something, anything! He needs—

Flashing blue and red lights filter in through the window.

He’s dead.

He’s dead, and this time Eddie wasn’t there to coax him back.

He’s dead and they sent an officer to tell him in person and Eddie’s never going to catch his breath because Buck’s the one that taught him how to breathe after—

There’s a knock at the door.

He can’t do this. Eddie can’t do this. He can’t—

How is he supposed to go to work without Buck? How’s he supposed to tell Christopher? How is he ever going to get up in the morning again? How is his heart supposed to keep beating in a world devoid of Evan Buckley?

He opens the door.

His phone clatters to the floor.

“Buck,” he sobs.

…

Eddie watches the slow rise and fall of Buck’s bruised chest as he sleeps.

He’s alive.

He’s okay.

He’s got tangible proof right in front of him, but—

Eddie reaches out and brushes an errant curl from his forehead.

Buck is alive and breathing and sleeping in Eddie’s bed and he’s okay. But Eddie—

He rests his palm on Buck’s sternum and counts each inhale.

Buck’s here. He’s fine. Maddie knows and Bobby knows and Eddie’s got the living proof right in front of him, but—

Eddie shuffles a little closer until the heat of Buck’s skin is overwhelming against his own. He hooks his chin onto Buck’s shoulder and tries to memorize the strange shadows and highlights that are painted on his skin by the light of the moon.

He’s alive.

He could’ve—

Eddie squeezes his eyes shut and shudders.

Buck’s alive and he’s right here, but Eddie can’t quite escape the moment when he was certain neither of those things would ever be true again. His breathing goes a little ragged, and his hands curl into fists.

“Eds?” Buck mumbles, eyes still closed.

Eddie lets out a shaky breath. “M’sorry, go back to sleep,” he whispers. The words are sticky and thick in his throat.

A small furrow etches itself between Buck’s brows. Eddie smooths it with his thumb. He drags his gaze back down Buck’s face and finds his eyes open and fixed on him.

“Eddie,” he whispers in the dark.

He takes a deep breath. “I’m fine,” he lies.

Buck frowns. He watches Eddie for a long moment, then something in his expression shifts. “Switch sides with me,” he says.

Eddie blinks. “What?”

Buck huffs a soft breath. “Just—trust me?”

And oh, Eddie does. He carefully climbs over Buck, who shuffles to his right to give Eddie more room.

“Okay?” he asks quietly.

“Almost,” Buck replies.

He pulls Eddie flush against him and guides his head down onto his chest. Beneath him, Buck’s heart beats strong and steady.

“Oh,” Eddie exhales.

Buck runs his hand through Eddie’s hair and down his back.

Eddie closes his eyes and finally, he sleeps.

#tysm for the prompt saturn!!#i hope you like it even though i cheated lmao #abbie answers #abbie writes #911 #911 abc #buddie #buddiefic #buddie fic #fic

248 notes · View notes

0nlythrowharrybeaux · 8 months ago

Text

Magnetic Part 2^**

A continuation of this fic where Harry cheats on his gf with Y/N and is basically pussy whipped.

Warnings: mentions of infidelity, heart break/break up, arguments/confrontations, mentions of alcohol & marijuana use, oral (f & m receiving) sex, unprotected sex, light dom/sub dynamic, light breeding kink, light pain kink, fingering, use of sex toy, daddy kink, forced orgasms.

WC:22K

HARRY’S POV

Things had been extremely quiet between Harry and his girlfriend since they got in the line for the valet and now well into the drive home. She was clearly upset at him, she was actively ignoring him when he’d glance over. But he was also a little bit frustrated with her for her attitude throughout the night. He was also annoyed that she tried to insinuate that you needed your uncle to find work, he had no idea where that had even come from! And while he had initially just thought about leaving it, the more he sat in silence with her, he needed to say something but he wasn’t sure how to bring it up without making her more upset at him. And as they got closer and closer to his house, he felt his emotions just forming a lump in his throat. He needed to say something.

“Babe.” He mumbled.

He waited a few seconds too long before he heard her respond, “Hm?” As she glanced up from her phone.

“You know I love you, right?” He asked and she nodded, “Which means I owe it to you to be honest with you.” He said and she straightened up.

“Yeah.” She confirmed. Harry licked over his lips and she swallowed the lump in her throat as she waited for him to keep talking, mentally preparing to hear the worst thing.

“I just…I can’t believe you tonight.” He sighed in disappointment, “I mean, what the fuck has gotten into you? You were so rude to Y/N!” He reprimanded her. She scoffed in disbelief.

“You can’t believe me?! I can’t believe you!” She raised her voice hand in the air as she gesticulated her frustration, “You have the hots for her!” She accused and he scoffed.

“I do not!”

“You were eye-fucking her all night, Harry!” She accused.

“All night?! We barely had a chat with them!” He shouted back as he turned to her, taking advantage of the red light. Her scowl melted into a dejected frown.

“All. Night. Harry.” She said emphatically. He could see the sadness in her eyes, it made his stomach turn.

He sighed and shrugged in defeat, “So what? She’s…she’s beautiful, I can’t…observe that?” He asked.

“You have a crush her.” She said and he frowned and immediately shook his head, denying her claim.

“No, I don’t!” He rebutted.

“How do you know all those things about her, then?”

“We’re friends!” He exclaimed and just held her gaze for several seconds. “We’re friends.” He repeated.

“Light’s green.” She mumbled before turning away and Harry sighed and turned back to the road and took off. It grew silent again and he realized that he was feeling rather anxious about her finding out about him sleeping with you. He didn’t want her to find out. God, just seeing the hurt in her eyes now had him feeling completely gutted. He couldn’t do this to her and if it scared him then that was maybe a sign that he didn’t want to lose her, right?

“Babe.” He mumbled again.

“What?”

“I’m sorry.” He apologized, “I did…look upon her lustfully.” He mumbled with a small smile and she turned towards him again. Harry glanced over quickly and was relieved to see her smile at him before he turned back to the road.

“That’s all I wanted. For you to admit it.” She said.

“Okay, I admit it.” He said again, “It’s been a while since we’ve seen each other, s’all.”

“Have you…been with her before?” She asked next and he sighed. “Before us?”

“Yes.” He responded and she clenched her jaw momentarily before exhaling.

“Okay.” She mumbled lowly, “It was the past.” She said to not let it get to her and he nodded.

“Exactly.” He reiterated. She then reached over for his hand and he let her grab it.

“I know she’s your friend but I don’t like her.” She decided and he nodded.

“That’s…fine, you don’t have to.” He chuckled a bit and she smiled upon hearing him say that. It was quite a relief to her that he didn’t expect her to get along with you, it made her feel like he was in her corner, which she really needed after feeling so insecure tonight.

“I love you.” She said to him.

“Love you.” Harry smiled.

****************

As soon as you got home after dropping Ian off, you scurried up to your room and stripped down and headed to your lingerie drawer; you wanted to dress up for Harry. You had lots of lingerie, not because you used it a lot but because sometimes you just liked to feel sexy and you’d wear it under outfits when you were feeling less than confident before a gig or project or around the house while doing mundane things like hoovering or watching TV; it was mainly for you. As you browsed through your options you landed on a black lace bustier. You grabbed that and got it on before digging around for the bottoms. When you located the basically sheer thong that went with the top, you slid it up your legs and set it into place. You then made your way over to your hair accessories drawer and pulled out a big chiffon bow clip. You did a tousled half up-half down sort of thing, taking advantage of your loose curls. You then touched up your make up and got on some lotion and perfume before jumping into bed.

You knew he’d be a while so you started to watch a movie, but when it ended and he still wasn’t here you got a bit worried. You checked your phone and didn’t see anything from him. Maybe he was handling something with his girlfriend? Regardless, you waited around a little bit more, but when it hit 2am you knew he wasn’t going to come. You were definitely disappointed, but more worried than anything because he would’ve at least warned you. You didn’t want to text him in case his girlfriend saw, so you just got through your nighttime routine before putting on another movie to help lull you to sleep. After staring at the TV for about 20 minutes you sighed and just reached for your phone and opened a text to him.

Hey, I hope everything’s alright.

You hit send without giving it too much thought and then a second later the bottom of your screen read “Not Delivered”. You instantly felt a lump form in your throat and then bit down on the inside of your cheek to localize the pain that would just pang throughout your entire body otherwise. You felt hollow from one moment to the next, so much so that it made you nauseous and you sat and just inhaled deeply before slowly releasing out your breath as your eyes started to well up. Your throat was burning as you tried to hold back the urge to cry.

“Get it together, bitch, s’not even your man.” you mumbled to yourself before laying back down. You grabbed your phone again and just deleted your messaging feed with Harry. He had made his choice and you were left on the outside. But it was for the best. It was.

The following morning you felt more calm about it, of course you were sad, but it was good that he decided to focus on his relationship. Either way, your feelings for him were getting a little too strong, so it was far better this way. You didn’t know what led to him blocking your number, but you were glad he had, it gave you a sense of closure. As much as you wanted to be upset about it you had no right to be. And it’s not like you could talk to one of your friends about it without brining shame to yourself and to Harry. You knew that they wouldn’t judge you or be assholes about it, things happen! But admitting that you kept accepting his advances is what you were ashamed of. You didn’t feel too guilty about it until now, when you realized that you had no one to talk to about this because it was embarrassing to have gotten to this point. You just needed to move on and also, you owed Ian an explanation.

*****************

Harry was feeling a hollowness in his chest and some guilt for standing you up and surely disappointing you in the process. He cared for you and he liked you a lot but he had a girlfriend and he did care for her. Yeah, things could be better in some areas but no relationship was perfect, so he needed to stop expecting a perfect match in every aspect of the relationship. It just wasn’t realistic to expect that and he had to appreciate what he already had. To some maybe this sounded like he was settling, but he didn’t think so. He was doing the mature thing and honoring the commitment he made to someone else. This was the right thing to do, especially upon realizing that if he didn’t stop it now, he had no idea when or if he could down the line. It actually kind of terrified him because he didn’t even know if you liked him in the same way he liked you. You were so good at compartmentalizing in this area, and he could too if he tried, but he liked you too much to do that.

He swallowed down the knot that formed in his throat, “Fuck…” he mumbled as he stared up at the ceiling, suddenly being overcome by what he could only describe as grief. Why did it feel like that?

“Harry?” He heard in the distance, “Harry, what’s wrong?” His girlfriend asked as she stopped moving over him. He suddenly snapped back to reality, realizing that he had been so in his head that he’d forgotten he was in the middle of sex with her. He dug his elbows into the mattress to help him sit up and then he grabbed her hip.

“I want to stop.” He mumbled and she frowned, looking perplexed and hurt at his sudden shift in mood.

“Are you sure?” She asked, “I mean, what’s wrong? Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I just don’t feel too good.” He grumbled and she slowly clambered off of his body.

“Can I get you anything?” She asked him and he shook his head.

“No, I’m just gonna have a shower. That should help.” He said and she nodded as he wordlessly got up and into the shower.

When he emerged from his shower he did feel a bit better, the anxiety of the choice he’d made had minimized enough that he could sit comfortably with it again. He had to stick to his guns not just for the sake of his relationship but for yours too. You didn’t deserve this, just pieces of someone’s attention and affection, you deserved someone’s whole heart. Thinking back on it now, asking you to tell him that you’d wait for him was the most selfish and cruel thing he had done to another person. It made his stomach sink once again and he felt this awful pang of hurt strike him right in the heart before radiating out to his fingertips.

“H?” He heard some taps on the door.

“Yeah?”

“Do you want some oatmeal with berries?”

“Sure.” He called back before looking up into the mirror again and sighing. He had made the right decision…it didn’t feel like it right now, but with time it could- no, it would, get better. He had to believe that.

…. ONE MONTH LATER ….

You were a little bit nervous as you were getting your dress on to go meet Ian. After the Harry thing, you came clean to him as to why you had abruptly ended your evening and Ian was hurt. He felt that you had connected really well and was looking forward to getting some alone time with you and so he was very disappointed to hear that. You then said that you actually did want to see him and he felt like you were just rebounding him and when you assured him you were not, he asked you to give him some time to figure out if he wanted to continue seeing you again and you agreed. He had reached out to you earlier in the week and asked to see you and you quickly agreed. You were actually looking forward to it and hoped that he’d give you another chance because you truly had a wonderful time with him and could see yourself starting to like him if you got to know him a little better. You were getting close to the bar he had told you to go to and kept an eye out for him up front and finally you saw him as your driver slowed down.

“Here we are, miss.” The older gentleman smiled.

“Thank you. Here you are.” You said handing him some cash, “I don’t need change.” You assured him and he thanked you before you opened up the door. Seconds later Ian was at the door, extending his arm for support as you climbed out.

“Hey, you look lovely.” Ian greeted you and quickly kissed your cheek and you did the same before pulling back.

“Thanks. You look great too!” You smiled as you looked him up and down before looking into his eyes again. He was quite a sharp dresser, you were impressed with his personal style.

“What?” He sniggered.

“Nothing…” you smiled, “I’m glad you called.” You said with a small shrug and he smiled.

“C’mon, lets get inside.” He suggested and you nodded and followed behind him.

You had a drink while you caught up over what you’d each been up to over the last few weeks and just as you recalled, he was charming, funny, smart…this man was a full fledged dream and you were willing to give him an honest shot. After you got another drink in you, you were well on your way to buzzed and were practically giggling at everything he was saying so you decided to share some spicy tuna on crispy rice boat things that just happened to hit the spot.

“Wow, those were phenomenal. Great suggestion.” You hummed as you carefully wiped around your mouth incase you had smeared your lipstick.

“Glad you liked it.” He smiled. “So…”

“So.” You responded with a playful smile as you looked up at him through your eyelashes.

“Obviously I…am attracted to you. I like you.” He said a bit timidly, breaking eye contact as he spoke the words, but then looking back at you.

“I like you too.” You assured him when he looked back into your eyes. You needed him to know that you meant it. Being vulnerable was a very hard thing for you but when it came to people’s feelings the least you could do was reciprocate it. It often made you feel a little bit foreign in yourself but the relief and pride you felt in yourself that came afterwards as a result of your candor did a great job of washing out any negative feelings.

“Ummm…I…I was engaged just a few months ago and we ended it because she cheated on me with her best friend.” He explained and your smile immediately disappeared and a frown took its place.

“Ian, I’m so sorry-”

“It’s fine.” He shook his head, “Well, it’s not fine, but I’m starting to be fine, I think.” He explained and you nodded. “But ummm…I’m not as ready to date as I thought I was. I think when I agreed to go to your aunt’s thing I mean…I just needed a night of fun. I wanted to get my mind off of things and it was great!” He added and you nodded, “But I’m not ready to continue seeing you as more than friends.” He explained and you felt like the bubble of your buzz had been burst as your throat suddenly felt like it was closing up.

“I get it.” You smiled softly. “And I continue to feel awful about being so abrupt to end our night out after how much fun we had-”

“Don’t be. I think if we had gone back to yours or mine I would’ve like cried during sex or something.” He chuckled with a little bit of embarrassment.

“Yikes…” you hissed jokingly, in an attempt to lighten the mood and he laughed, which you were glad he did. “I’m kidding, I mean…it happens.” You shrugged.

“I suppose.” He smiled and was more than grateful that you were taking this all in stride. “I think I’m also a little bit…scared of you.” He added and your brows furrowed in concern.

“W-why?” You asked cautiously and then regretted asking. Maybe you didn’t want the answer anymore.

“Like I love that you were so honest about what happened, I genuinely appreciate that! But the fact that you just have men at your disposal like that…it just…kind of made me feel…unsafe.” He said and your frown deepened, “Which was such a contrast from how things felt at the party so it was like an emotional whiplash for me. And this is not to say you’re in the wrong for this! You have every right to do as you please, you’re a smart, beautiful, and fun single person, you know? That’s not…like I’m not trying to shame you for what you do in your own time, it’s me. Like…I don’t know how to not feel…upset by it?”

“It’s still fresh, what you’ve been through with your ex-fiancé.” You clarified and he nodded.

“Yeah, I think that’s the main issue here. Clearly I’m not emotionally or psychologically prepared for anything with anyone right now. Sorry.” He apologized sincerely and you smiled and shook your head.

“I understand, Ian. There’s no need to be sorry.” You assured him, “If anything, I’m even more sorry for making you feel that way! It was a super shitty thing to do and you didn’t deserve that.” With your gaze cast down at your hands, you apologized, but you felt even worse now because you were exactly the kind of person who had hurt him before. You were disappointed in yourself for being so careless with other people’s feelings; it was so disappointing.

Clearly, you had no regard for another person’s relationship and had slept with a taken man. Friend or not, it was a line that never should have been crossed, even the first time had been a little suspect to anyone looking from the outside in. Seeing Ian being so affected by his ex had you feeling truly ashamed over everything with Harry for the first time as you imagined how shitty his girlfriend would feel if she ever found out. It was easy to shut that off when you were with Harry or at least when you were on speaking terms, but the distance between you two and now Ian’s own experience was forcing you into giving every single possible consequence some thought and it was awful.

“Ummm…you don’t have to tell me but w-was it…Harry?” He asked, his volume lowering significantly when he spoke his name. You quickly glanced up and met his inquisitive gaze and after a few seconds he smiled knowingly and you bit your lip and looked away as your eyes started to well up. Not with hurt but actually with shame. You felt absolutely disgusting. “Hey…w-what’s wrong?” He asked and you just shook your head.

“I…kind of hate myself for it right now.” You got out and he reached for your hand.

“Hey, we all make mistakes.” He reassured you, “I’ve been there too.” He confessed and you sighed, “Look, just because I’m the victim now doesn’t mean I haven’t been the one in the hot seat.” He said with a smile and you chuckled a bit and nodded.

“Yeah…I just never thought I was capable of doing something like that…but when it’s just so…right…” you sighed, “You forget about everyone else.”

“Yeah.” He replied, he was full of understanding, which you were more than grateful for.

“How did you know? What did I do?” You asked as you rolled your eyes up, slightly irritated at yourself for not being as discreet as you believed you were. But Ian shook his head at you before responded.

“It wasn’t you at all actually, it was…all him.” He chuckled and you looked back into his eyes again. “When he would look at you it was like…you’re the eighth wonder of the world.” He explained and your heart literally fluttered in your chest. “As you were talking he like…followed your every move, reacted to every little thing. Almost as if you were the center of everything…” he shared and you licked over your lips nervously, you were doing your very best to not let this information go to your head.

“And you know this how?” You asked instead as you looked at him inquisitively.

“He’s a handsome guy! I was looking at him too.” He chuckled with a shrug and you giggled as well and nodded.

“Yeah…that he is.” You nodded in agreement.

After that you got on to a lighter topic but your mind was in some distant place thinking about Harry. About what Ian had just described to you. You’d looked at Harry like he was the center of the universe before too…

…. 22 JULY, 2023….

You always thought he was attractive, but seeing him at the Reggio show from the friends and family section had put him on another plane for you. You had a great view of the stage and of him and the big screen with him on it. The beautiful, powerful chords of the intro to Golden filled the air around you, the bass so strong that you felt a tickle beneath your feet as the earth reverberated with his music. The beautiful, golden lights glowing behind him made him look like a god. In that moment you were filled with pride and awe, you wished he was yours to love on after everything was over. But a few people behind you was the girl he was seeing. You were standing by Jeffrey and Glenne, you were exchanging excited glances as he walked up to the mic and greeted the crowd in Italian. One hundred thousand people simultaneously cheered in response. You’d never heard anything like it! It made your heart skip a beat as your voice joined the battalion of them.

You bit your lip as your eyes honed in on his big, buff arms flexing as he strummed his guitar. You were trying not to get carried away thinking about how you’d bitten into the “can I stay” inked into his skin just a few days before in Portugal. You started laughing happily as you looked right at him, just about to burst with excitement and pride for him. And then his eyes met yours and it’s like the sound just dropped off and everything was muted down and delayed. You swear an eternity passed by as you watched his lips turning up until there was a bright and flirtatious grin on his face as he very quickly looked you up and down.

Your heart was hammering in your chest, you were aching to feel his lips on yours one more time…then he turned away and continued with his performance.

You were awestruck by him. You watched him give it his entire heart and soul to his audience that day, he didn’t want to go, he didn’t want it to end. And when it all ended and you were all hanging back and having celebratory drinks you got a brief moment with him when you’d run into each other outside of the bathroom. You hugged him for a few moments and smiled so wide.

“Was I good?” He asked.

“You were phenomenal. It was iconic!” You praised him as you pulled back, “I’m so proud of you, H!” You insisted passionately and he chuckled.

“Thank you. I’m happy you’re here.” He said and you smiled.

“Thank you for having me.” You chuckled. He grabbed your face gently and let his thumbs stroke over the high points of your cheeks. He smiled softly as he held eye contact with you for a few seconds before you blinked your gaze away, “Ummm…you should probably get back there. I heard your dad asking around for you.” You informed him.

“You met my dad?” He asked and you nodded, “Brad introduced us. I accidentally cursed in his face.” You sputtered on a laugh and he knocked his head back in laughter as he laughed from deep in his belly.

“What?! How?!” He questioned.

You laughed and shook your head, “He was like, “H didn’t do too bad, did?” And I was like, “Oh yeah, he was so fucking brilliant!”, I was so excited for you!” You laughed as you explained, “I watched his eyes go wide at my passion. He’s definitely gonna warn you about me.” You joked and Harry slid his hand down and then ran his thumb over your bottom lip.

“You’re so fucking cute.” He grinned.

“Yeah, so are you. Now go on.” You insisted and he looked at you suggestively with those pretty, bedroom eyes, “Go, H.” You said again.

“You’re right.” He hummed as he let go and sighed before stepping around you as if nothing had happened.

“Hey, Harry!” You called after him and he turned around, “For the record, I’m like…always right.” You smirked smugly and his lip twitched up as well.

“Noted.” He winked before disappearing for the rest of the night

….Flashback Over….

You blinked quickly a few times, not really sure how long you’d been zoned out for, “Sorry…” you apologized quickly.

“It’s alright. Touchy subject?”

“Yeah…just a bit.” You smiled and shrugged, “It’s fine…but we just haven’t talked since then.” You explained.

“He fucked you and then ditched you?!” Ian asked with a frown.

“Oh no…no, he changed his mind. He actually never showed. Which I’m so proud of him for but with that came like a no contact thing so it’s been weird just guessing what he might be up to. It’s kinda weird because we are friends, so…” you trailed off.

“Oh okay…I was about to say he’s a fucking prick.” He chuckled and you smiled and shook your head.

“Nah, he’s quite the opposite. It’s fucking infuriating.” You giggled and he nodded as he withdrew his hand.

“I want to keep in touch, YN. I mean, maybe down the line when I’m more…myself we could try if we’re both still interested.” He said and you smiled.

“Yeah, I’d really like that.” You agreed.

At the end of the night you shared a taxi home, he wanted to make sure you got in okay. As soon as you made it past the threshold of your front door, your phone started pinging and you dug it out of your purse. You saw it was Goldie, she’d sent several good luck messages and that you should catch up about it the following day if possible. You smiled and just called her. It was barely half past eight, she should be awake. When the phone stopped ringing you spoke into the receiver.

“Hey, G. You alright?” You asked as you slipped out of your heels.

“Hey, good and you? How’d it go on the date?”

“Ummm, it was more of a “lets quit while we’re ahead” type of thing actually.” You chuckled in response, “But thanks for checking in.” You smiled. You couldn’t wait to have a cup of tea and do anything to distract you from the slight disappointment you were feeling.

“Boo…” she replied and you shrugged. “So what you’re home now?”

“Yeah, literally just got in.” You replied.

“Do you need a distraction?” She asked and you smiled.

“I certainly could.” You smiled.

“Okay, I’m actually out with Sam right now, we’re having drinks at The Ivy while we wait on Paul.” She shared, “Come! I don’t want to third wheel!” She insisted, you slightly heard Sam asking who he was inviting, “Y/N, her date night was cut short.” She explained as you seriously weighed out her invitation.

“I don’t know…I just got in…” you grumbled.

“Which means you’re already dressed up anyway!” She reasoned and you sighed and shrugged.

“Sold.” You giggled.

“Yay! We’ll see you here soon!”

“See you soon.” You agreed and quickly went touch up your make up and get on a little more perfume before rushing out of the house again and walking to the main street to catch a cab. When you got in you spotted Goldie, Sam, and Paul chatting at the bar. Goldie grinned wide and waved you over with a bright smile.

“Hi!” She beamed.

“Hey everyone!” You smiled as you walked up and greeted everyone with a quick hug and kiss on the cheek, “What’s going on?” You asked as you looked between them.

“We’re just waiting for them to figure out the table situation. Harry ended up tagging along with Paul, they just finished watching Swan Lake. We didn’t tell him that we had asked you to join already so they’re just waiting for a booth to clear up for us now.” Sam explained and you smiled and nodded but your mouth went completely dry.

You could feel your heart starting to hammer in your chest and you were terrified of having to face him. It filled you with anxiety. You couldn’t look at him and feel unfazed yet, it would just make you feel awful and guilty and like a complete piece of shit. Your stomach was twisting and your brain working against you as it came up with catastrophic situations and fed into your anxiety.

“Ummm G, I suddenly am not feeling well.” You said softly to her and she frowned in concern. She was just about to ask you what was wrong when Paul raised his arm, capturing her and your attention.

“H, over here!” Paul spoke up and you were suddenly feeling full of anxiety as Harry surely approached the group. You didn’t want to turn around…you couldn’t face him yet. You weren’t ready!

“Hey, thank you for ummm….” He paused briefly as his eyes landed on you, “For waiting.” He finished and Paul nodded and smiled. He then proceeded to greet everyone and you very stiffly hugged him back.

He started talking to Sam about the ballet and how incredible it had been. You were certain that if you had also been able to sit through several hours of Tchaikovsky before this run in you’d be just as composed as he was, if not more. You looked him over and smiled a bit, he was really letting loose. His hair was looking a little messy and he was growing it into some long-lost Gallagher brother-esque faux hawk-mullet hybrid that you were really loving. And his facial hair was looking fuller than before. You wanted to think he was letting himself go a bit because he missed you, but even if that were the case, he still looked infuriatingly good. And well, in his true fashion of always having to do something a little raunchy and edgy, he was wearing a t-shirt that said: I LIKE TO WATCH. If you hadn’t been so anxious about seeing him you would’ve rolled your eyes and commented it on it, maybe even gotten a lot turned on by his brazenness, but you were just trying to keep it together right now.

Moments later you were being guided into the booth and you ensured to stay on the end in case you just needed to leave quickly at som point. Much to your dismay, he was across from you and also doing everything in his power to prevent himself from looking at you. You had soon ordered your drink and everyone else did the same plus some food. Even if you were feeling peckish, you weren’t sure you could stomach anything other than liquids at this moment.

“So what happened with your date, Y/N?” Sam asked and then everyone’s attention focused on you. You felt put on the spot and but responded anyway.

“Ummm…I kind of…messed up a tiny bit after our first date.” You explained and then frowned a bit, “That’s…a lie. I majorly messed up. And he was taking some time to think if I was worth the risk, I guess? But as he thought about it he concluded that he’s not ready to see anyone in any serious capacity right now so we’re just going to stay friends.” You summarized your conversation with Ian from earlier in the evening “And well…here I am now.” You shrugged with a tightlipped smile.

“So he asked you on a date to tell you he wasn’t going to date you?” Paul questioned.

“Well, I think I just got excited and assumed it was a date. But ummm…it wasn’t so…” you shrugged before sipping more from your drink nervously.

“So you’ve been single for a while?” Sam asked. You’d known Paul for quite a while, even before he and Sam got together, so while you’d known Sam for a few years now, he wasn’t really in your circle until more recently.

“A while is…putting it nicely.” You mumbled in slight embarrassment, “Try five years.” You chuckled and his eyes went wide.

“Holy shit!”

“Look, it’s not for lack of effort! I go on dates a lot but ummm, nothing has…panned out really.” You shrugged as you glanced down at a little snagged piece of fabric on the table cloth.

“I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, Y/N but you give “fixer” vibes.” Sam said and you looked at him in confusion.

“What does that mean?”

“Sam-” Paul started but he brushed him off.

“It’s not a bad thing! But she seems like the kind of person that makes men wish they were single again.” He said and Harry reached for his drink then, “Like look at her! She’s gorgeous and talented and smart and a fucking laugh! So when they inevitably get bored of their girlfriends and end it, they go to her and she shows them life can be fun again.” He said and you smiled slightly at him, “That getting to know someone and being with them can be exhilarating! And being the sweetheart you are,” he glanced to you, “you take care of these people. You nourish them, support them emotionally and physically…You breathe life back into them, you know?” You nodded in understanding, “And then how do they repay her kindness? They leave her high and dry despite all of the good things she did for them. That’s a fixer. Not like she seeks them out to fix them, but they need fixing and they just come to her in order to…feel something again but it’s never reciprocated.” He explained and you were trying so hard not to cry and scream “YES! THAT’S EXACTLY MY LIFE!”

“Jesus…That’s an awful thing to say, Sam.” Paul said with disapproval and he frowned.

“You’re right. I’m sorry, Y/N.” Sam apologized quickly. “I’ve had a lot to drink already and I wasn’t thinking.” He said reaching over Goldie’s hands to grab your own and you just smiled at him and shook your head.

“Aw Sam, it’s alright, I know you didn’t mean it in a bad way. I’m not offended.” You reaffirmed, “If anything I’m…happy there’s a term for it! Thank you!” You smiled sincerely and he smiled at you with a tenderness in his eyes.

“You’re so fucking gracious.” He sighed, completely in awe of you, “I don’t deserve you as a friend.” He shook his head.

“I promise you, we’re so good, Sam. Don’t worry about it.” You reassured him and he nodded. It was still quiet at the table for a few more seconds and it was killing you, “Anyway…why didn’t you two go to the ballet?” You asked Goldie and Sam.

“We weren’t invited. Harry only invited Paul.” Sam explained with a sassy smile as he side-eyed Harry who scoffed.

“I told you I was only gifted two tickets!” Harry said. And well, you couldn’t help but wonder if he was gifted two tickets…why he hadn’t taken his girlfriend along?

“So? You can afford it, Harry.” Goldie said matter of factly, a moment of silence passed before you all burst into laughter at Goldie’s comment.

“Jesus, I didn’t know everyone was so into the fucking ballet.” He mumbled making you all continue laughing.

“You didn’t think maybe your friends would want to spend time with you?”

“Not on my dime.” He joked.

“It’s how the rich the stay rich.” Sam shrugged as you all laughed along.

“I kid…” Harry smiled easily, “Next time.” He assured and Goldie looked at him with raised eyebrows, “I promise.” He chuckled and she grinned.

“I’ll be waiting.” She hummed and then the topic changed again to something else that wasn’t you and you were more than grateful about that.

You were getting tired mentally from going against every single signal your brain would send, tempting you to just stare at Harry and get lost in him. It was like there was this pull that drew you to his movements, you just wanted to sit and admire him. You wished you could scoot in beside him and feel his warmth coming off of him. You wondered if in another world you could do just that. Yeah, you knew that he probably missed you, but he hadn’t picked you. You needed to stop being so pathetic by wishing for a miracle. Especially by staying so hung up on him despite the time that had transpired and the circumstance you two had been in. You just needed to collect yourself for a moment.

“I’m going to the bathroom. Be right back.” You said lowly to Goldie before standing and heading off. You heard Harry say, “Me too.” before the sound of his foot steps got closer and closer to you. You started walking a bit faster to make it there before he had the chance to catch up to you because you didn’t need this right now. You needed the distance so fucking bad, no matter how much you wanted him close by.

“Hey, wait up!” He called out as he fastened his pace to catch up with you.

“I was getting up to get away from you, you know?” You said with a smile as he came up beside you.

He glanced to you quickly, “Sorry.” He smiled and you turned back to look ahead of you. “Are you doing anything after this?” He asked you and you glanced to him with an insulted look on your face and suddenly he gasped and grabbed your arm hard and pulled you into him. “Almost crashed into a waiter.” He informed and you glanced up at him.

“Thanks.” You said and he nodded.

“And I don’t mean it like that.” He said, “Just want to talk. I have some things I need to say.” He said as you stopped before the bathroom doors.

“I’ll think about it.”

“Okay, thank you. I’ll offer you a ride home and ummm, if you decline then that’s that. Sound good?” He asked and you nodded in agreement before you hurried into the bathroom. You just looked in the mirror, weighing out your options. Of course you wanted to hear what he had to say, you couldn’t avoid him forever, and you had to start practicing your self control sooner or later. You could do this.

After Harry asked to talk to you and you had decided to hear what he had to say, time seemed to be moving slower than ever. Hearing him out could potentially help you move on as well, but now that you wanted to hear it it was like everything was preventing that from happening, it was making you second guess yourself and you started debating it in your head. Then, the next thing you knew Harry was standing before you asking,

“Do you want a ride home? The driver is heading your way after dropping me off.” He looked at you expectantly and everything fell still as you nodded.

“Yeah, that’d be great. Thank you so much.” You accepted and you watched as his lips turned up as he assured you it was no big deal.

You started saying goodbye to the rest of your friends before you were following Harry to the curb where his driver was waiting. You settled in as he shared the new plan for the evening with his driver for the night, Jaime. Next, he put up the partition before settling into his seat. He glanced up at you as he pulled out his phone.

“Address is still the same?” He asked and you nodded and he started typing away and sent it off to the driver before setting it aside and looking at you.

“What did you need to say?” You asked and he sighed.

“That I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for putting you in the position I did.” You shook your head.

“It wasn’t just you. I was a willing participant.” You added.

“But I always sought you out.” He said and you smile slightly and nodded, it was true.

“Well, I accept your apology. Thanks for that.”

“It’s the least I could do.” He said as he reached for your hand and you let him take it and you gave him a squeeze before letting go.

“What made you change your mind?” You asked and he smiled a bit.

“We were fighting about you in the car and it hit me that I was terrified of her ever finding out about this. Like, I genuinely felt scared of losing her.” He said and you nodded in understanding. “Was the guy you had seen tonight still the guy from the party? The professor?” He asked and you nodded.

“Yep.” You confirmed.

“Bummer. I’m sorry.”

“Yeah.” You sighed. “I…really hit him where it hurt. His fiancée was cheating on him, so when I left him for you, he…just took it really hard.”

“Shit…” Harry frowned and you nodded.

“I know. It put a lot into perspective for me and like…I don’t want to be that person either. I don’t want hurt anyone like that. This isn’t fair.”

“Yeah.” Harry agreed, “I want to be friends though. You’re fucking sick.” He said with a genuine smile and you smiled down at your hands .

“Thanks, so you are you, Harry.”

“You know something? I still can’t get over the fact that your favorite song is Burning Love.” He mumbled through a widening grin. “It’s just…you don’t seem like the type to listen to Elvis.”

“I don’t. Just that song because that’s what my favorite burger is called from the Red Robin burger chain, I’d sing it every time I’d have one and it grew on me.” You shrugged with a smile and he chuckled.

“You’re fucking lovely, you know that?” He asked and you giggled and rolled your eyes playfully. Then a silence took over you two and he sighed, “I know I just said that I was afraid of losing her but ummm…can I just say that things at home have been…a little rough lately?”

“Do you want to talk about it?” You asked.

“Do you mind?” He asked back and you shook your head.

“I don’t.” You assured him.

“Well, I don’t know…like I’m prioritizing us more, but I don’t know…when issues keep coming up and like…I feel I’m always the one having to compromise or apologize, you know? She doesn’t like to work through things as they come up and it kills me. You know how I am…” he said and you nodded, “And if I want to resolve anything I always have to take the blame and it takes a toll, even though I know it’s not always my fault.” He vented, “Anyway, she’s out of town right now, s’why she didn’t go with me tonight. But it’s for the best, I think. I just need a little space after we argue about something big.” He explained.

“I’m sorry, Harry.” You said comfortingly. “But you know, sometimes things get a little worse before they take a turn for the better.”

“You’re right.” He decided after a few pensive moment, “I really am trying to make that better s’also why I’ve been so distant from you. I’m just trying to prioritize her and us. It’s not because…you “fixed” me and I bailed on you, or whatever Sam was saying.” He explained with a roll of his eyes, clearly still very irritated at what Sam had said.

“Well, I can’t say I wasn’t expecting it at some point.” You shrugged with a small smile.

“But did it…feel that way for you? That you were…fixing the things I didn’t like about myself in my relationship?” He asked and you shook your head.

“Not with you.” You assured, “What was there to fix? I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you for not liking everything about your relationship or how it’s panning out. As long as there are humans involved there are bound to be good and bad things, you know? And I mean, we’re all different and have different likes and needs. I mean, was it a dick thing for us to do? Of course it was but…I think what needed to happen, happened. And well, at the end of the day you realized that she’s more important to you than the sex! And that’s great. I mean, I’m happy for you. I’m glad that you figured that out.” you said with a smile, despite feeling like your heart was withering away little by little. You then looked out the window as you saw the scenery changing, indicating you were nearing his side of town.

“Hey.” He reached for your hand again and you turned back to him again, “I just wanted you to know that yeah, the sex was…incredible,” he smiled bashfully, “but it wasn’t just that for me.” He said and your lips turned down in a small pout as his words registered in your brain. “I started to blur the lines a lot, I mean, you know that and you always set me straight and it…hurt though. And seeing you with that guy-”

“Ian.” You added and he nodded.

“Yeah, seeing you with Ian at that party made me so upset. I could see that you guys were into each other. It’s why I went and found you afterwards.” He confessed, “I wanted you to have me fresh on your mind if anything were to happen between you two.” He explained shamefully and your eyes filled with sadness, “I was selfish and I…was so out of line for that and then just…left you hanging.” He sighed with a sad smile on his face. Your eyes were threatening to spill the tears that were already built up in them, effectively blurring your vision.

“And now, hearing what went down with him I feel like shit because I took that opportunity from you. I literally ruined that for you to just give you pieces of my attention when you deserve far more than that.” He frowned, “And while I have acted so selfishly when it comes to you, I really want you to know that I wasn’t just using you for sex. Like I can’t help but think that if we had run into each other again just even a few months earlier on the tour then we would probably be-”

“Don’t.” You whispered as your tears started to spill over when he said that. He looked to you with concern as you sniffled, “Fuck me…” You whispered spitefully at yourself and he quickly reached over to grab a few tissues from the box nestled into the holder before him. You took them and expertly dabbed at your eyes.

“I’m sorry.” He apologized.

“It’s fine.” You mumbled as you dabbed beneath your nose as well.

“It’s not though.” He pressed as he watched you trying to keep it all together right now.

“It is, Harry!” You snapped suddenly. The silence that followed between the two of you was deafening. “It has to be fine.” You insisted assertively. It wasn’t even three seconds before you immediately regretted your explosive reaction, “I’m so sorry for raising my voice at you, Harry.” You apologized immediately and his gaze softened.

He admired you so fucking much. You were so good at this part, at the hard things. You listened to understand, not to respond and fight back. He felt safe sharing everything with you, he wasn’t afraid that you would judge him like he feared his girlfriend would sometimes. The proof was even in your sexual relationship, you tried things with him that he had been judged for in the past just because they probably weren’t expected to be part of his preferences. He certainly had a deeper interest in you, just based off of the time your lips weren’t attached to each others, you connected so well. You could talk about things as silly as your preferred brand of ketchup or as serious and daunting as the state of the world, and then find a way to transition into passionate and genuine sex, the most primal form of human connection. So…when he had moments like this, where he was reminded of how fortunate he was to know you, things got a little bit murky in his brain, which is why he responded to your outburst in the following manner.

“It’s alright, angel.” He reassured you as he grabbed your face gently in his hand. The term of endearment he used for you just slipped out and made him fall into this much more intimate space that you two had shared before. When he realized what he had done he sighed, “Maybe this was a bad idea.” He said as he pulled away. Watching him go from so vulnerable to regretful of it was so painful and he could see it in your eyes, “I never intended to hurt you with this.” He said with a sense of remorse sinking into his chest, it was making him feel like breathing was getting harder to do.

“No, I needed to hear all of this to…help me move on.” You said and that made his guts twist with hurt, but he nodded along with a small and unconvincing smile anyway.

You could see in his eyes that his mind was off somewhere far, far away from this place. You too wanted to be so far removed mentally and emotionally, but you really needed to bask in the hurt and the feelings of disappointment of what could’ve been so that you could just really get it through your head that this was absolutely done. Yeah, you wanted to stay friends but you both needed to shake your feelings before you could be together in any space again without feeling that pull that was still there, even now.

“Ummm, I know we said that we want to stay friends, but I think we need to give it some time just to…not risk repeating history, you know?” You suggested.

“Yeah, you’re probably right.” He agreed as you guys turned onto his street. You looked out the window as you drifted off into thought.

One of your friends from university had contacted you about coming to help with his debut album, it would require you going back to America for at least three months. Maybe more if any major changes or hitches occurred in the project. You hadn’t decided yet, but maybe you should do it. A change of scenery and pace could help you move on. You could reconnect with old friends, meet new people, get your creativity flowing…this could be really good for you.You remained silent until you were pulling up to the perimeter gate around his property line.

“Well…” you sighed as the large gates started to part after the driver input the code.

“Do you need the bathroom or water or anything before you go?” He asked and you shook your head. You knew better than to go into his house right now that his girlfriend was gone. You knew he was just being polite, he didn’t mean it suggestively.

But then again, with your prior arrangement, he could have you even now if he wanted. You’d let him. You’d want him so long as he wanted you, so you it was easy to give him that power over you. He knew that already and with one shared gaze you could see that he was thinking exactly what you’d been thinking. You smirked knowingly and he just smiled so brightly as he grabbed your face and smushed his lips to your forehead.

“Cheeky.” He mumbled before pulling back to meet your gaze again.

“Said the pot to the kettle.” You sniggered and he smiled down at you.

“Take good care of yourself, love.” He said as the car rolled slowly to a stop.

“You too, H.” You smiled as he leaned in to hug you. You quickly kissed cheeks before he pulled back and slid out of the backseat. He rounded over to the driver’s side and you rolled the window down to see him off.

“Jaime, thank you so much mate.” Harry said as he handed him over a generous cash tip.

“H, not this again.” He said pressing it back towards Harry.

“If not for me, at least for making the extra stop.” He said, “Please. I insist.”

“This is the last time.” He grumbled and Harry chuckled.

“Alright, well get her home safe, for me. Precious cargo.” Harry said as he smiled at you.

“Certainly, H. Good night.” Jaime said and he bid him goodnight before reaching for your hand and holding on until Jaime had driven you far enough that your hands pulled apart. You slid back into the window and rolled it up. You didn’t even feel like crying, you felt alright for now. But the important thing was that you left each other well and that was the best thing that could’ve happened. Yeah, it hurt that it seemed like you’d missed each other in life but at least there were memories you could share.

…. TWO MONTHS LATER ….

You were currently crowded into the corner of the rooftop at The Roosevelt for some fashion ambassadors event by some brand. Your friend, Monty had been booked as the entertainment for the evening and he pulled you in to play the bass for his band at the last minute. You were just grooving along as you played “Something” by The Beatles. You loved playing this song, it had such a fun and iconic bass line. And as you looked around the crowd you caught a glimpse of Harry’s girlfriend in the audience, she was looking right at you and when your gazes met she turned away and started talking to the person behind her. You found that odd, but decided to leave it. You’d only interact if your paths crossed.

But just as fate would have it, as you walked up to the open bar during a break in the set, you both just happened to break through the crowd at the same time and stepped up to the bar together. She glanced at you and you smiled at her.

“Hey. It’s nice to see you again.” You greeted her politely.

“Hi.” She smiled half-heartedly and her gaze was kind of cold.

“How are you?” You asked her a bit awkwardly.

“I’m fine and you?”

“I’m good. Been pretty good, been out here for a couple months already for work.” You shared and she hummed with a polite smile. It was awkward because you really weren’t friends or anything, so you decided to bring up the person who had been the common link between you two. “H-how’s Harry?” You asked and her smile dropped immediately.

“Look Y/N, I’m sure you’re a nice person but I don’t want you going near him anymore. I don’t care if you’re friends. I’m sorry if that offends you, but I just don’t trust you.” She said lowly. You didn’t know if he had told her what had transpired between you two but it’s the only thing that made sense. And because of this, you nodded in response, letting her know you understood and respected her wishes. She looked hesitant before speaking again, but said it anyway, “I know you…slept with him.” She informed you, voice still softer than before and your throat dried up.

You couldn’t breathe and you just felt completely humiliated as you looked right in her face as she said this to you. But now it made sense, why she was acting so cold towards you. She knew what you and Harry had done and now you had to face the music, like an adult. No excuses and no shifting blame. All you could do now was apologize to her for sleeping with her boyfriend and assure her that it was purely carnal and it would never happen again.

“I’m so sorry. I know you might not believe me but I mean, I feel awful about the whole thing. I swear it wasn’t more than those couple of times and it was purely physical. I haven’t tried to contact him at all or-”

“Couple of times? Why would you feel bad about sleeping with him before?” She questioned with confusion and you suddenly felt your stomach drop to the ground as you realized that she in fact didn’t know the full story. Well, now she did and you could see the cogs in her brain turning as she pieced the information together.

Harry had told her something else and you had no fucking clue what that had been! You knew you had to get out of this somehow, but you were completely frozen as the realization hit her like a ton of bricks. It’s not like you could take back what you had said. But if you could give anything up in the world to turn back time and say something else, you would. Your eyes started welling up as you felt this sense of doom starting to seep into your body, it traveled from deep in your guts to the rest of your body as she looked at you expectantly. You shook your head and she stepped closer to you.

“How many times, Y/N?” She asked and you shook your head again, “Fucking tell me.” She pressed, trying to keep her anger at bay.

“Four or five times. I-i think.” You stammered as your tears started to streak down your cheeks.

“When was the last time?” She asked and you swallowed thickly as you fought to keep the words in. “Y/N.” She pressed and you sniffled.

“Look, he loves you and he-”

“Tell me, you fucking slut.” She hissed quietly, all you could see in her eyes was rage.

“M-march.” You said and she inhaled deeply and pressed her lips together for a second before looking off as she processed the information. She then turned to you with disgust painted all over her features, “Fuck you. Stay the hell away from him or else. Do you understand?” She admonished and you nodded quickly as you blinked back tears before hurrying off.

You were panicking as you searched around for Monty, he had the room key for the suite you had been given to hang out in during the day. And right now you needed to get to your phone and warn Harry before she got a chance to go off on him. You were weaving through the crowd trying to find Monty and then you spotted Harry’s girlfriend leaving the event with her phone pressed to her ear and a scowl on her face. That image alone made your stomach turn uncomfortably and one single thought crossed your mind: Harry was going to hate you forever now.

****************

Waiting for Harry to call you was miserable. Hours passed, then, it had been a day. Then, two days. Then, a week. And once that week hit you were resigned to the fact that even your friendship with him was over and that’s why he wasn’t talking to you. You hadn’t meant to sabotage him or his relationship, but you’d made his worst fear come true. You were dying to reach out but you were scared that you’d just make things worse.

But also, how the hell were you supposed to know that he’d said something else about your relationship? But just the way that she had been acting towards you made you believe that she knew that you two had slept together while they were dating. If he’d been single when you slept together there was no need to for her to be acting upset or cold towards you unless she was just extremely jealous. Which now, was more than justified. The only other person you could turn to at the moment was Ian because he had figured it out on his own, but you didn’t want to bother him with any of this. It wasn’t his to fuss over and he was still dealing with his own infidelity problems. Your time in LA was coming to a close quickly and you were petrified.

You were so nervous to go home. The community in London was quite small and word got around fast, especially when the gossip involved someone as famous as Harry, it was one of the downsides of his success. But if you had made the mistake, then you needed to face the consequences of the mistake as well. If you lost friends or if people stopped trusting you then, so be it. You had done something awful and you had to tough it out.

“Hey.” You heard and turned around to see your friend Monty stepping out onto the small balcony that came with his apartment.

“Hi.” You responded with a small smile and he came over and plopped down into the seat beside you and exhaled slowly, like he was letting something off of his chest.

You were crashing in his guest bedroom for the duration of your stay and were taking advantage of the Southern California sunsets while you had the chance to. Your trips to America were mostly to New York and it was so different than this. People were in a rush here too, like in every big city, but they were so much nicer about it here. Well, so long as your decision making didn’t take time out of their day. Regardless, you weren’t ready to go back to the reality surely awaiting you in London.

“You alright?” He asked and you nodded, “Sure? You’ve been…weird.” He said with a small smile and you sighed.

“I did a bad thing, Monty.” You said and he frowned, “A really bad thing.”

“D-do you want to talk about it?” He asked and you smiled.

“Depends…just promise you won’t judge me too harshly.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” He replied and you smiled, but then it faded away and you sighed.

“I…had sex with one of my friends. Multiple times. But he’s…in a relationship.” You admitted and he turned to you.

“That’s it?” He asked seriously, but seconds later a smile broke past his lips and you chuckled.

“Thanks for trying…” You mumbled and he laughed.

“Yeah, of course.” He chuckled, “But ummm, seriously, there are worse things you could do, Y/N.” He said.

“I suppose so…”

“More seriously though, we all make mistakes. And I know you well and I know that you wouldn’t just do that for anyone. You must really care about him if you were willing to break all the rules for him.”

“I do. But feelings don’t justify hurting another person. And well…I ran into his girlfriend at the gig last week and she said that she knew we had slept together and so I assured her that it was just those couple times but she didn’t know it was a couple of times or that it was recent. She thought this had happened while he was still single, which the first time we did, he was!” You explained, “But her confrontation made me panic and I…spilled my guts! So I…did a bad thing and then probably ruined his relationship on top of that.” You sighed, still feeling the guilt making you feel sick to your stomach.

“Let me stop you right there.” Monty smiled, “You didn’t ruin their relationship. He ruined it himself by pursuing you. If he truly loved the person he was with, nothing could make him stray. So stop taking responsibility for things that aren’t yours to be responsible for. You hear me?” He asked and you nodded a few times with a small smile. “Next thing, forgive yourself in your own and don’t do it ever again. You learned the lesson didn’t you?”

“Yeah.” You confirmed.

“Then stop torturing yourself and move on.” He advised, “It might take time, but take the first step now. Sitting here and torturing yourself over something that’s in the past is not going to do anything for you or for them.”

“He hasn’t…reached out or anything. I really thought he would.” You said with a small voice and Monty hummed.

“But, you know what that means then, right? That he’s…made his decision and it’s not you.” Monty stated and you exhaled shakily as a few silent tears streaked down your face.

“You’re right.” You concurred before looking ahead again, watching the sky change colors as the sun sunk deeper and deeper into the horizon.

********************

You were finally getting home after the near 11 hour flight from LA. You were nervous to run into Harry because you still hadn’t heard from him and assumed that it was because of the same thing Monty had told you, he was working things out with his girlfriend. She had wanted you out of his life, she said it to you herself. So it made sense why he hadn’t reached out to you. You imagined that he hated himself a little bit for doing it this way, but if it gave his partner peace, he would sacrifice his preferred method of dealing with shit and find closure another way. You were similar to him in this as well, you wanted to apologize to him and explain that you didn’t air his dirty laundry on purpose! Even if he still decided to never speak to you again, at least you’d get to say your piece! You’d definitely prefer his silence from that than the ‘pretend Y/N doesn’t exist’ method he was using now. But considering you might not have the chance to do that, you too needed to find another way in which to close the door on Harry for good.

Your thoughts were racing as you cycled through your tasks in a disorganized fashion. You had started unpacking your luggage to put things in the washing machine but then decided that you needed to brew yourself some coffee to help keep you awake so that you wouldn’t have jet lag. But while you waited for your coffee to brew you decided to have a quick body shower so that you could complete all your tasks in a fresh and comfy outfit. And when you emerged from the bathroom, wrapped in a towel you groaned and saw the outfit you wanted to wear was sitting in the dirty laundry portion of your suitcase. You were starting to get annoyed and decided you needed your caffeine immediately. And when you made it to the kitchen you saw your empty mug sitting under your Nespresso because you forgot to add water to it and that was your last straw.

All of the anger and frustration that you had pent up inside from the situation with Harry, how tired you were, and how scatter-brained you felt just bubbled over and you grabbed the mug in fit of rage and threw it on the ground, shattering it into an irreparable heap of ceramic.

“Fuck my life!” You shouted, your chest was rising and falling dramatically as you started to get choked up. You sniffled as your tears blurred your vision and you started to cry. You’d been trying to keep it together, to not be upset at any of it because you had been the one in the wrong, but it still hurt. It hurt to know that Harry had feelings for you but not enough to choose you. It hurt to know that your friendship with him was more than likely over. It hurt to know that you’d compromised a part of yourself, that you’d stooped so fucking low for absolutely nothing at all in return! All you’d truly gained was a fuck ton of self-loathing and you couldn’t pretend that you didn’t deserve it because you absolutely did.

*****************

Harry’s POV

When Harry’s girlfriend called and confronted him about what you’d shared with her at whatever party you two were at, he was livid. He immediately thought the worst thing, that you were trying to get him back or to sabotage his relationship. But when the initial wave of rage subsided and he was able to think a bit more rationally, he recalled how you’d also respected the fact that, that’s where he would be focusing all of his efforts. And you had said that you cared for him and if that were true, you would never do anything to hurt him on purpose. He had to believe that and he had to cling to that.

When his girlfriend returned home she gave him an ultimatum, if he wanted things to move forward in their relationship then he had to leave you out of his life. He felt sick to his stomach upon hearing that so he’s not sure why he agreed to it so easily, but he did. It had been weeks now and the more days passed by, his regret in this decision only grew. He was sitting in mediocrity, in routine, and a lot spite towards himself. Did he deserve it, yes, but he couldn’t see a world in which they could make it past this with the way she was acting. She would just pretend she wasn’t upset about it and then when they’d have a disagreement it always got thrown back in his face, no matter how much he apologized for it. When he’d ask what he needed to do to make it better she’d say she didn’t know or when he wanted to help her understand why he did what he’d done, she didn’t want to face it! But when she’d get frustrated about it, she’d blow up on him and not let him respond. And it started to sink in that he had made a mistake in trying to force things to work with her and he had to say something.

This is why he found himself waiting up for her to get back in from a rehearsal. He needed to get some things off his chest. Harry was one to talk things out, he didn’t like to sit on things and let them brew and fester like she did. And that’s what he’d been doing a lot of lately, just sitting in dissatisfaction. When he heard the front door open he sat up, more than prepared to just get the conversation over with.

“Hey babe, still up?” He heard her approaching.

“Yeah. Waited up.” He responded and she smiled as she came through the door and directly to the bed and kissed his lips. He was a little stiff in returning the kiss and she sniggered, “What’s the matter?” She asked, with a dimpled smile adorning her face. And as he looked into her eyes he just felt the need to be honest with her.

“Ummm…I…I can’t do this anymore.” He said softly and her smiled faded. She blinked a few times, as if she were trying to determine if this was real or not.

“Seriously, Harry?” She scoffed with an angry but surprised expression on her face.

“I’m sorry.” He apologized as he looked deep into her eyes to show his sincerity, but soon her eyes were narrowing into angry slits.

“Wait…Are you dumping me for her?” She asked and he sighed. “Oh my god…” she mumbled incredulously as she stood and paced around as Harry got out of the bed and walked up to her and grabbed her shoulders from behind and she whipped around, “Don’t fucking touch me!” She shouted at him and he frowned but nodded. “What does she have that I don’t, Harry?” She asked sadly and he shook he sighed. He didn’t want to go down that road, she never saw when she was in the wrong and it would just make things worse, but he needed to be honest.

“It’s not that there’s anything wrong with you.” He explained, “It’s just different with her and she’s more…open to things th-that you don’t like and that I find myself…wanting more of.” He explained and she scoffed.

“That’s it?! All the sex shit I refuse to do?” She asked through a scoff, “Are you fucking kidding me?! You know, she’s only into that shit because she’s fucked up, Harry! Only a fucked up person can find pleasure in being used and degraded that way!” His features furrowed in offense.

“So what does that make me then?” She frowned when she realized what she’d just said.

“Harry, it’s not-”

“No, please, give it to me straight! It was my idea, I’m the one who brought that into our affair and she liked it. So if she’s fucked up for liking it, then what am I for wanting it?” He questioned and she shook her head.

“I just…I don’t understand it.” She said, “It’s not…normal.” She elaborated and he smiled sarcastically.

“Yeah alright, let’s say you’re right and it’s not. So what we do is normal?” He asked her, “Just the same thing, over and over and over again? After a fucking year together you refuse to even try new things with me! All you do is judge me for it? It’s like you don’t trust me!”

“I don’t! I don’t trust you when you’re in that headspace, Harry! What if you hurt me? What if you can’t stop?!” He rolled his eyes.

“I’m not a fucking monster!” He shouted back, “That’s the fucking point of all of it, to exercise control or to relinquish it! It’s all a two way street! But quite frankly, it never has been with you…” he said and she scoffed.

“I do things for you!” She shouted back and he rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, your half-assed head really makes me feel close to you.” He murmured sarcastically and she groaned.

“You know that I don’t like to because you’re too big for my comfort and I don’t want to get all messy and…it doesn’t make me feel good! It makes me feel cheap and used!” She shouted back and he nodded.

“Yeah, how do you think I feel whenever I’m the one pulling all the weight in our sex life and in this relationship? I want to enjoy it, I want feel good in this relationship too!” He exclaimed, “I fucking dread it when I know you want to fuck! Or when you’re upset at something! I really fucking do!” He confessed and it felt so good to say it and she frowned deeply upon hearing him say that.

“So that’s all that matters to you? The sex?” She asked sadly.

“Of course not, but it’s pretty fucking important to me.” He said and she rolled her eyes.

“And what about everything else? What about the emotional and intellectual connection we have? W-we have that down at the very least don’t we?” She asked and he sighed.

“Sure…but it’s…more w-with her.” He said and she shook her head in disbelief, “There are things about how she is that just…resonate more with me. It’s not just the sex, it’s a lot of things that we deal with more similarly.”

“Okay, like what then?” She asked and he sighed.

“Like now, when we’re arguing about something or needing to discuss something serious. You…just pretend like nothing is wrong until you can’t handle it anymore. And when I try to talk about it then this happens! You just shout and shout and never fucking listen t-to what I’m trying to say or how I feel. And when I try to bring that up, you always say you’re not ready to talk about it!”

“Yeah, I like to think through things, Harry! Not argue in circles!” She defended herself and he groaned.

“We only argue in circles because you don’t listen to anything I’m trying to say to you!” He explained already feeling exasperated, “You’re doing it now! Things don’t have to escalate into a fight whenever we disagree about something, we could discuss it. That’s the point of talking it through then and there. While emotions are fresh and the situation is at hand! You use your words to communicate how you feel and what you want. I’m not a mind reader, I don’t know what you’re thinking or how long you’re gonna take to think about things, at least communicate that!” He explained and she sighed.

“Well, that’s not how I like to do things.”

“Well, there are two people in this relationship. Two different people with their own needs and expectations, not just you.” He said and she scoffed.

“Oh please! And all this with Y/N wasn’t just about you? Fucking someone else while we were together, that wasn’t selfish of you?”

“Of course it was! I know it was and it was wrong of me. I recognize that I made a mistake in going to another person.” He accepted, “And I’m sorry that you’ve been hurt in the process. She told me, multiple times to just talk to you so that I wouldn’t have to go find happiness somewhere else and I tried! I really fucking tried and it’s just…not happening for me with you.” He said sadly.

“And what, she’s going to make you happy?” She asked sarcastically.

“I don’t know, but I have to try, if only to rule out the fact that she’s not the one for me.” Harry said and that’s when she started to cry.

Of course he felt awful about it, but just now, hearing her even say some of the things she had said made him feel like he didn’t fully know her. And more than that, the things she had said were mean and offensive. He understood that she was hurt, but he’d never considered that she could stoop that low, even when angry.

“I fucking hate you.” She seethed as she stormed off into the ensuite and he sighed as he sat down on the edge of the bed. Moments later she returned with the clothes from her designated drawers piled up in her arms and she dropped them on the bed. “Can you at least grab my suitcase from the top shelf? I can’t reach it.” She said and he nodded and did as she asked.

“Do you want me t-to give you some space?” He asked and she sniffled.

“Do whatever you fucking want, Harry.” She mumbled through her tears as she continued putting clothes into her large suitcase. He sighed and stood before going down to the kitchen to set the kettle for some tea.

It was about twenty minutes later when she called him up to help her bring her things down as her friend would be arriving soon. He did just that and soon she was coming down the staircase with her duffle bag hanging off of her shoulder.

“Where are you going to stay?” He asked.

“With a cast mate.” She mumbled, “At least until I can go back home.” She said and he nodded.

“Can you just let me know when you’re in safe for the night?”

“Oh, now you care…” she mumbled.

“I do care about you. I have this entire time, I just-”

“Care about her more.” She said plainly.

“I was going to say that I’m just not in love with you anymore.” He said and she sighed.

“You know, I don’t think I am either.” She confessed, “I thought we were fine but…I guess, fine is rather anticlimactic in a relationship.” She said morosely.

“Yeah.” He concurred. Then, her phone chimed to indicate her ride was here and she went over to the security keypad by the door and opened up the gate for her friend to get through. He helped her get her things outside and into the boot of the car. She came over with her duffle and he grabbed it from her and neatly set it beside her suitcase before pulling the door of the boot down gently.

“If I find anything else of yours should I send it to your flat in New York?” He asked.

“Yes, please.” She confirmed.

“Okay, no problem. I really am sorry, I know that I went about things the complete wrong way, but-”

“You know what, just save it, Harry. I really don’t give a fuck.” She said with a tired smile and he licked over his lips and nodded awkwardly before clearing his throat.

“Well, then…I uh-”

“I really hope that fucking whore is worth it for whatever time you have together.” She cut him off, “And I hope it’s painfully miserable for you two and that she cheats on you too. And when she does, because a whore can’t help herself, and I inevitably hear about it through the grapevine, just know I’m going to be so fucking ecstatic. I will not hesitate to reach out to you just to rub it in your stupid, fucking face, Harry.” She said spitefully and he couldn’t help but smirk as she wished him ill. He just had never seen this side of her.

“Alright, love, you do that. Use up all your free time to keep tabs on me.” He mumbled sarcastically.

“Fuck you, Harry!” She spat before walking around him to get into the car. He sighed as he walked back up to the front door and he heard her shouting at her friend that she didn’t want to talk about it and to just go. So the car started again and he waved them off with a smile as she stuck her hand out the window and flipped him the bird as they took off into the night.

Yeah, he deserved everything she’d said. He’d definitely been a bad boyfriend, particularly towards the end there, but he felt relieved. Relieved that he no longer had to be the only one compromising. Relieved that he’d no longer have to skirt around things and keep shit bottled up inside to keep her comfortable. And relieved that at least now, he’d have the chance to explore having more with you. He truly had no idea if during your time apart you’d managed to move on fully. Or if his silence over the last few weeks had made you hate him or if it’d completely broken your heart to the point that you no longer wanted anything with him. But regardless of all of that, he was certain of one thing, which was that you’d at least hear him out and let him apologize and explain. If it were his ex that he was trying to fix things with, well, he’d assume that her reception would be similar to her goodbye to him. Even if you wanted nothing to do with him in a romantic or sexual sense anymore, he knew you’d still find it in your heart to stay friends with him and he reckoned that even that would be enough for him.

…. A FEW DAYS LATER ….

You had been doing a bit better now that you were back home. You’d come clean to Goldie about what had transpired between you and Harry. And while she was shocked and disappointed in the both of you, she was still there for you and let you cry out your hurt and disappointment. What you feared would happen, being ostracized and judged harshly, wasn’t the case, thankfully. In fact, Goldie had just invited you out with her Sam, and Paul. She assured you that she hadn’t heard of Harry joining, but you wanted to err on the side of caution for the time being and respect the very clear distance that had been put in place by him. Even if Harry didn’t show up, if his girlfriend saw that you were out with more of his friends it might make her feel like you were purposefully encroaching into his life. You had already done enough to complicate things between them, so you needed to be mindful of things like this.

“Thanks, G. It’s sweet of you but I’m just not up for it tonight. Especially not with Paul around. If she sees something from the paps or even social media it could upset her and I don’t want to risk upsetting her even more.” You explained.

“Oh, babe…I appreciate you wanting to do the noble thing, but you really need to get out a bit to get all this off your mind, you know?” She countered and you smiled.

“How about this? I make a reservation at Cecconi’s for tomorrow in the late afternoon. We have an early dinner with a few Negronis and that phenomenal mixed berries cheesecake they serve! And then, when we’re well buzzed, we go to SOHO House? We can get drunk and flirt with people, and network.” You grinned as you giggled.

“We have to look fit. I mean FIT!” She emphasized and you giggled again.

“Yeah, you can even come over and get ready together!” You offered since you lived closest to SOHO.

“Alright! We can make a whole day out of it! I can bring bagels from Papo’s! And we can have Prosecco’s and coconut water so that we’re drunk, but hydrated!” She shared excitedly.

“Yeah, alright.” You agreed.

“I’ll pop in around 9:30 or 10?”

“Yeah, that’s perfect.” You agreed and she squealed happily.

“I’m so excited! Can’t wait!”

“Neither can I!” You assured happily.

“Ah, alright babes, I’m gonna let you go. Have a good night, yeah?”

“You too, G. See ya’ later.”

“See ya’!” She chirped before hanging up.

You smiled to yourself as you finished packing your left over dinner. You then headed up to your room to just wash up and get into your pajamas so that you wouldn’t have to get up and do all this if you accidentally fell asleep while watching TV. You went over to your window and opened it up to let the cool temperature of the night waft in. You then went about and lit a few candles before turning down you bed and switching on your sunset lamp, projecting a warm pink and orange collage on your ceiling. You set down the remote on your bedside table and then bit your lip as you saw your wand vibrator’s light blinking steadily as it charged up.

Next on your list was your weed, it was just three prerolls that you’d smuggled in from LA. Stupid and risky, yes. But worth it. You grabbed one of the little tubes and went to set it down by your bean bag sofa chair along with the ashtray and lighter in your hand. You then headed downstairs to grab a glass of water and your dark chocolate KitKat that you’d purchased earlier when you’d decided on how you’d spend your evening. You were switching off all the lights and then stopped before the front door for just a moment, and then your doorbell rang. You flinched in fright at the unlikely coincidence, and chills tingled your spine as the chime sounded through the townhome. It wasn’t all that late, but a little too late for deliveries. You quietly padded up to the door and tiptoed a little bit to look through the peep hole and froze.

Your mouth slightly dropped open in shock when you saw Harry standing at your doorstep looking right to left as he tapped his foot nervously. You felt a lump forming in your throat and your heart rate started to rise rapidly. You were tingling all over with excitement, fear, dread, and happiness. Suddenly he looked right at the peephole, it made your insides churn violently as you made eye contact through the little lens.

“Y/N?” He asked and you relished at the sound of his voice, but felt your chest ache because he needed to leave.

“You shouldn’t be here, Harry.” You said through the door.

“I need to be here, angel.” He said and you felt your chest tighten up. You pulled back and turned the locks to open the door and as soon as you were in front of him he just chuckled happily and stepped forward, pushing his way inside so that he could wrap you up in his arms. He just threw the door back before he pulled you into his chest. “Hi, angel.” He hummed lowly as he leaned his face against the side of your head.

“Hi!” You laughed happily as you settled into his warmth. You were pleasantly surprised that he was here. In the flesh! You were touching him, breathing him in. You gently tickled his back with your nails and he hummed.

“Missed you, angel.” He hummed and you smiled.

“Missed you too.” You responded, “Are you alright?” You asked him and started to pull back.

“Yeah, I’m alright.” He smiled, “I ummm…I ended things with her.” He said of his girlfriend, well, ex-girlfriend now.

“I’m so sorry. Are you sure you’re alright?” You asked and he nodded again.

“Even more so now.” He flirted and you sniggered a bit and you just looked at each other in silence for a few seconds, “Look, I’m so sorry-”

“I’m so sorry, Harry-” You both spoke at the same time and chuckled.

“You don’t need to apologize.” He said, “I know you’d never do anything to hurt me on purpose.” He said and you nodded.

“Never, H.” You assured him and he smiled at your reassurance.

“So…what the hell happened?!” He asked through a chuckle and you groaned.

“Don’t make me relive it…” You whined, “You’re lucky that I didn’t jump off the rooftop then and there. It was mortifying.” You giggled and he tutted.

“I need to know!” He insisted and you groaned.

“H, I had a whole plan for the evening.” You muttered.

“Did you? You were gonna go out?” He asked and you shook your head.

“No, they were…homebody plans.” You said coyly and he smiled.

“Yeah? Walk me through the plan then.” He pressed and you bit your lip.

“Mmm…was gonna smoke a joint…” you hummed and his eyebrows arched up as he smirked, “While listening to smutty stuff…and probably get off before just getting to bed.” you confessed and he bit his lip.

“Are you just trying to make this sexual?” He asked and you laughed and shook your head.

“No, I swear! I have a whole set up in my room.” You giggled and he knocked his head back as he laughed.

“Well, d’you mind if I distract you from your plans for a little bit?” He asked and you shook your head.

“Not at all.” You assured and he smiled, “Come on.” You said and grabbed his hand as you guided him through your townhome and to your bedroom.

Harry saw the beautiful pink glow of your bedroom from down the hall. And he could also smell the delicious floral but warm and musky scent wafting from your bedroom. He inhaled deeply as he crossed the threshold and immediately went over to see the candles you had burning. He didn’t see a name apart from the brand on the vessel and as he glanced down to see if there was perhaps a lid close by he saw your vibrator plugged in and charging and he chuckled a bit, he had definitely intruded tonight. But maybe if things went well he could improve upon your plans. Normally, he would just go up and grab you if he wanted you and he was certain you wouldn’t object. But if he got to have sex with you tonight, he wanted to show you another side of what it could be like because of his feelings for you. You two were always fighting to keep the tender and loving bit out of your sessions, but he could still be kinky and sprinkle in the loving bits if you were open to trying for more with him.

“You really weren’t kidding.” He said and you turned back to see him pointing at your toy and sputtered on a laugh.

“I really wasn’t. It’s alright though, I can do that any other day.” You chuckled as he walked over and then plopped on your bed to slip out of his sneakers. “Ummm, do you want some of this?” You asked him, raising the joint and he nodded. “Okay, so I don’t have another seat to offer you, this is my designated smoking chair.” You explained to the bean bag sofa chair.

“You have a smoking chair?” He questioned you and you sniggered.

“I do! I don’t smoke often at all but I don’t want to stink up any of my nice furniture when I get the craving for it.” You explained and he hummed in amusement at your logic.

“I see…well, I can sit on the floor just get me a cushion for my bum.”

“Okay.” You hummed and grabbed one of the round, velvet cushions you had as decor on your bed and set it beside the bean bag. You then settled in as he came over and with his foot, guided the cushion to the front of your seat. You glanced up at him and he smiled down at you.

“Open up.” He said and you parted your legs so that he could sit and nestle between them. Once he was comfy you leaned over him and handed him the joint and lighter. He sparked it up and took the first drag before handing it back to you, seconds later he was blowing the smoke out the large window and then you did the same. “So…how’d it happen?” He asked, bringing up your conversation from downstairs.

“Well, my friend Monty was hired as entertainment for the party and he asked me to tag in as the bassist and I agreed. I saw her from the stage at one point and smiled but she did not look pleased. So I decided to just not interact unless we were forced to because I didn’t want to stir up any trouble for you.” You explained.

“So you were forced to speak to her?”

“Yes! During the break in the set we both happened to walk up to the same bar line! Just my fucking luck, you know…?” you muttered as you recalled and he chuckled and turned around to face you instead so that you could converse better. “We said hello to each other and like…she seemed fine by then. Maybe it was stupid of me to ask how you were, but I was just making small talk because you’re the only thing we really have in common in terms of acquaintances.” you explained and he nodded, “And then she said that she’s sure I was nice but that she wanted me to stay away from you because she didn’t trust me.” You shared, his features turned down as he hummed in understanding, “And then she finished that with saying, “I know you slept with him”, that was it. Just like that.” You explained and his eyes widened. “Yeah!” You laughed nervously, as the feelings from that moment resurfaced again.

“Jesus…”

“I know…I was frazzled!” You exclaimed before taking another drag and handing the joint back to him. You held it in for a minute as he took his own drag, and then you blew out the smoke towards the window. “Just hearing it like that, in such a confrontational manner, I thought that meant that she knew-knew.” You said and he nodded, “So I just started apologizing frantically and assuring her that it hadn’t happened any more than those times and that you loved her, but I guess you told her something else because she looked really confused when I said that.”

“I just told her that we had been together before she and I were together, just about the one time before.” He said and you hummed.

“I’m sorry…I didn’t mean to fuck things up for you two. She just started to ask me how many times and when! And I was…so embarrassed and nervous and ashamed of myself.” You pouted and he reached for your calf and rubbed his thumb up and down your leg soothingly.

“I’m sorry, angel.” He replied. “I must admit I thought the worst at first, but then I just…I knew you’d never do that to me.” He said and you nodded.

“I wouldn’t, H. I know that it was a mistake and you were trying your best to not make the same mistake with me again-”

“Hey, look at me.” He said as he set the joint down on the ashtray you’d set out, “The only mistake I made was not choosing you from the very beginning. Even after the first time I was blown away by you. I was fucked from the start.” He said and your gaze softened, “I…I’ve felt things with you that I haven’t felt before. And while I…love that we’re compatible in the sex part of things, I’ve also given some thought to what things might’ve been like if we were together. And Y/N, I think it would be really good.” He said earnestly and you smiled softly at him. “Even just in the glimpses I’ve had of real life situations I’ve been in with you, I know we’re compatible in those parts too. You actually listen to me to understand me, not just to respond, you know? You think about me and consider me, even before yourself sometimes.” He said. “I know that…I haven’t done a lot of that for you previously, but I would like the opportunity to show you that I can do that for you and more.” He said and you smiled.

“To be fair, you did try, I just never let you before.” You added as you raked your fingers into his hair and he leaned into you, “I’ve also felt things with you that I’ve never felt before.” You confessed, “But it…scares me, H.” You confessed and he pouted a little bit, “Not because of you, but because of me. I fear that I would get lost in it.” You said and he smiled.

“Why is that a bad thing? I could get lost with you.” He mused and you giggled.

“We’re too old for that kind of thing, H.”

“Yeah, but that’s part of it, isn’t it? The honeymoon phase? Relishing in love without a care for what could befall us?” He asked and you smiled, “Get lost in love, in the excitement, in the sex…” he hummed with a grin, “That’s literally the best part.”

“It is…” you smiled in agreement.

“You know, when I think about you, I can’t imagine that the initial excitement will ever go away. We’d have so much fun together.” He said and you smiled.

“We would. But what about when things get…hard. Like when you’re touring or on other projects?” You asked and he thought about for a moment.

“We could be like Paul and Linda in WINGS.” He suggested with a small smile and you giggled, “No! Seriously! Hear me out…you could join the band! We could do all of it together, like Mitch and Sarah!” He said and you smiled, “Create, write, and perform…I know you’d love life on the road. And then just…do life together.”

“It does sound amazing.” You admitted with a smile.

“It does. And I know that I’m just out of a relationship, but things are a little bit different than just a normal breakup. We had something together and I want to explore it with you. I want to have the chance to make you happy how you deserve, angel. No more bits and pieces of attention and affection. If you give me your heart, I promise I’ll keep it safe.” He appealed.

You caressed his face gently, “My heart’s been yours for a while now, Harry. And even through all of this, I think you’ve done a wonderful job of protecting it.” You assured him. “I don’t want to ignore this anymore. I just feel so good when we’re together or even just in each other’s space.” You said softly. “You know, sometimes it feels like I’m connected to you in a certain way. Or maybe it’s my imagination…” you mumbled, excusing your ramblings.

“We are.” He assured you, “I feel that too. It aches a little when we’re apart. And I just…sense it when you’re close by.”

“Yeah?” you smiled inquisitively and he nodded.

“Believe it or not, I was sitting out there for about half an hour, trying to decide if it was too bold of me to show up here unannounced. I had no idea if you were in or not. And then I suddenly felt this sense of urgency and came up to your door and here we are now.” He shared.

“Ummm, actually…when you arrived at the door I was about to go back to my room and just stopped at the front door for a few moments. I don’t know why, I just felt like I needed to. And then you rang the doorbell.” You shared with a smile, “Creepy, huh?” You asked.

“Mmm, I think it’s rather normal.”

“Being that in tune with another person is not normal.” You voiced your opinion, “I think it’s quite special.”

“I meant it’s normal for us.” He said and you grinned.

“Oh, then you’re 100% right.” You giggled and he smiled and leaned forward to kiss your knee through your pajama pants. You smiled down at him and when his eyes glanced up to meet yours again you sighed dreamily, “Just getting to be there with you is already way better than the plans I had made for myself.” You said through a giggle and he chuckled.

“Mmm…I think we could redirect things back to the original concept.” He smirked and you giggled but then your face turned serious.

“We don’t have to if you’re not ready for that. I’m not even horny or anything, was gonna build up to it with the spicy audios.” You confessed, “Although, well…seeing you definitely made me horny.” You chuckled bashfully, “So I am now but this is also good. We don’t have to if you’re not, you know…” You finished explaining.

“Oh, I definitely am, angel.” He chuckled, “Can’t help it when I’m around you.” He smiled, “But I…want to try something a little different this time.” He said and you nodded.

“Okay, what is it?”

“I wanna be more in my feelings while we do it.” He said and you bit your lip to suppress a nervous-excited smile.

“Umm…o-okay.”

“Okay. I’m just letting you know because…I know that we already get a little wild, but with my heart in it too, things could get a little bit more intense.” He warned you.

“That’s alright.” You nodded.

“And can I…ask you something?” He looked a bit nervous upon getting his request out.

“Of course.” You nodded.

“W-when I…degraded you and overpowered you or things like that, where I was…rough and harsh on you…” he started and you nodded, wordlessly communicating that he continue, “Did you do that for me? Like…did you agree to it like t-to please me. Because I like that or is it…well, was it for you too?” He asked.

“Of course I did it to make you happy but because I like it too.” You shared, “I like it quite a bit. Maybe a little too much.” You smiled as you shared.

“Do you think that…that means we’re…fucked up?” He asked, you could see he was feeling vulnerable for being self-conscious about it.

In your opinion, the last place a person should be feeling ashamed in was in their sexuality. A person’s sexuality is such a vulnerable part of them, it reflects your deepest darkest fantasies, your id. It was the home of the libido according to Freud. And it could be a little kinky and perverted and maybe even a little scary to confront. But the beauty in that was that how well a person dominated that side of them, was a clear indicator of the amount of ego strength that person has. Which can only mean that a person has a very righteous and strong sense of conscientiousness, the superego. So in short, no, their preferences did not make them “fucked up”. It made them human. It made them normal. And indulging in that part of themselves in the appropriate setting helped them be able to flourish in all of the other roles they had in the world. Like being musicians, an uncle, a creators, a friend to others, a good person…

“Definitely not.” You said reassuringly. “Not if you don’t feel wrong for it.” You added, “Do you?” You inquired and he shook his head.

“It feels….liberating.”

“How so?” You asked with a smirk…you were ready to get started, “When you decide that you want to fuck me, what goes through your head?” He licked his lips and smiled slightly.

“Well I think, I always get the things I want. And when I want that, when I want you, I just…take you. Because I can.” He smirked.

“So you’re selfish.” You grinned and he shrugged.

“I tend to be…one of my many flaws.” He smiled and you hummed.

“You know how I am…hyper independent. A control freak a bit…” you said and he nodded, “My instincts tell me not to be, to just take what comes my way…deep inside I know I’m actually powerless. And while it’s terrifying, there is something freeing about that. Because while it makes me vulnerable to really shitty things, I also makes me vulnerable to really wonderful things. Like getting bent over your hotel room bed with your cock in my pussy and your fingers in my ass…” You laughed and he did as well. “So, you give me what I need and I give you what you need, even the secret parts of us connect well. So yeah, it’s fucking freeing to be seen and understood on every level. We’re so fucking lucky to exist at the same time.” You said softly with a smile.

Harry didn’t even hesitate to kneel up and smash his lips into yours. His kiss was ardent, heavy with affection and lust. Your tongues smeared together before he sucked your bottom lip between his lips. He gently bit into it, increasing his bite force bit by bit until you dug your nails into his shoulder. Your kiss simmered down from one second to the next and became so sweet. Just small and playful little pecks interrupted by giddy smiles and soft giggles and mumbles about starting to feel the weed.

“The back of my knee is tickling!” You giggled and he sniggered, “Ughhh, scratch it please. Make it stop.” You requested and he pulled the leg of your pants up to be able to scratch the back of your knee, “Thank you.” You giggled and pecked his lips quickly. “Wanna get in bed?”

“Yeah, angel.” He mumbled and then he picked up the joint, “Let’s finish this off so that it feels extra nice.” He instructed as he sparked it up for you. “Want you to be a little easier for me.” He said and you smirked as he took his drag.

“Don’t need to be high to be easy for you.” You chuckled and he did as well and kissed you gently before shotgunning the smoke he’d exhaled into your mouth.

“Maybe not but it’s more this way.” He said before kissing you again and handing over the joint.

Once you’d finished it off you both stood and Harry started to undress you. He was getting your panties off when you handed the butt to him and he smashed it into the ashtray to properly extinguish it. He stood and then pulled you over to your bed, you happily plopped on it as he got undressed. He instructed you to grab your vibrator, so you crawled to the other side of the bed and unplugged it from the charger. Your pussy pulsed and fluttered in anticipation. You wanted to feel the silicone buzzing into your clit so badly, you were growing impatient and even more wet than before. You wriggled and rubbed your thighs together to get some friction going. Your labia glided together with ease from how aroused you were as you watched Harry undoing the buttons and fly on his jeans. You’d give anything to kiss down his abs and smooch down his happy trail until you got a mouthful of his cock. You moaned as you watched him pull down his briefs along with his jeans, his thick, long cock sprung up, wobbling about a bit from the sudden release. You licked over your lips. He watched you salivate over his cock, so he knelt onto the bed and put it in your face.

“Get me in your mouth then.” He mumbled and you immediately parted your lips and started to suck on the tip for a bit before starting to stroke the rest. His soft moans of pleasure were making your skin tingle, you’d missed the sound of him. And the weight of him on your tongue. And the taste of his skin, and it’s natural scent. “Fuck yeah, angel. Take more..I know you can take more.” He said as he pushed your head lower, letting himself dip his toe in the kinky forceful stuff you enjoyed for just a moment, “Shit!” He chuckled as his abs tensed, “Yes, baby…That’s fucking good, just…just wind it down for me. That’s it. Nice and slow, angel. Deeper…a little more.” He hummed and then groaned as he settled just a bit past the back of your mouth, you were holding back a gag, “Fuck, can’t believe how it all fits in there.” You couldn’t hold it back anymore and gagged around him which make him moan in pleasure, “Yeah, gag on it, angel.” He grunted and held himself in before gently pulling back to let you catch your breath. He did this a few more times until your chin was sticky with your drool and his pre-cum. “Is your little pussy throbbing yet?” He asked and you nodded as you wiped your mouth on the back of your hand. “Go wash up.” He said and you nodded and hurried to the ensuite to rinse off your face.

He knew how much you hated to feel sticky in the face. You soon came back into the room to find him playing with the vibrator. He was clicking through the vibration patterns before he settled on half-note pulses and then pressed it to his frenulum. You stood and watched from the darkness of the bathroom, watching his brows crease and jaw clench as he pleasured his cock with the vibrating wand. He was a fucking masterpiece, and with you being a little high it was making you even more needy for him. You slowly approached and he glanced up to you.

“I think I need to get one of these.” He chuckled before biting his lip.

“Yeah, it makes me come like a fountain.” You shared through a chuckle and he groaned.

“Yeah?” You nodded, “Show me.” He said as he extended it towards you and you bit your lip nervously and climbed onto the bed. You settled into the pillows and he passed over the baby pink vibrator. He settled in beside you and kissed the top of your cheek. “Go on, then. Play with yourself.” He instructed and you didn’t need to be told twice.

You spread your legs and slowly pressed the vibrator against your clit and immediately gasped. You were already sopping wet, so when you added more pressure it slipped a bit and Harry groaned as he watched you adjust a bit to get it back on your clit. He grabbed your thigh and pulled it open so that he could see you better. His mouth was watering as he watched you getting off, his fingers were itching to touch you in between your legs. He wanted to get down there and breathe you in and taste you until he had his fill of you. He only lasted a few more moments before he kissed you deeply and then shifted around until he was down between your legs and watching up close as your little cunt throbbed and oozed slick. He snatched the vibrator from your hand and shut it off as he delved in. He shook his head back and forth, wiggling to get his tongue in even deeper into your little hole. He wanted to taste everything you were giving right from the source.

“Oh fuck, Harry! Fuck yes, just like that!” You encouraged him as you ground up against his mouth. You were obsessed with the scratchy feeling of his facial hair pricking against your smooth pussy. And you loved how he held you open and licked from your entrance to your clit, flicking the sensitive little bud over and over with the tip of his tongue until you were gasping as your teetered on the edge of your orgasm. “I-I’m gonna come! Please, let me come!” You announced in a higher pitched voice, he hummed against you to signal his permission. Your muscles were completely tense as you held onto the feeling as long as possible until your first orgasm burst from inside of you.

Coming with his help was different. It was your quality of work without having to do any of the actual work. He read your body in ways that made it impossible for you not to give in. It felt so good to be free falling into that gratifying, warm, and tingly feelings. You loved how it tickled just right that it made your toes curl. And hearing him and feeling him moan into your leaking pussy made your eyes roll back before squeezing shut. You loved how he feasted on you. He was kissing your pussy as passionately as he’d kissed your mouth. You were just basking in how happy he was to be here with you. Your hips arched up as you tried to escape his mouth but he locked your thighs in his arms and held you down. It was getting to be too much! You hadn’t even had a chance to fully come down from your orgasm and you were already well on your way to another one. You were writhing and yelped as he nipped at your clit. He chuckled, knowing you didn’t mind a bit of pain. Just as you were about to get to a place where the tingles fully faded he parted his lips and sucked your clit between his lips. His tongue managed to just barely run over it, it was making your had spin. Your thighs were starting to tremble as he was forcing you past the point of no return.

“Harry!” You yelped as he sucked with more force, “Oh! It’s too much! Please! Please, no more!” You pleaded as he forced you down and open and kept sucking. “Fuck! Please, please!” You cried desperately as you writhed beneath him. Suddenly, the most obscene moan broke from your throat involuntarily as your hips and legs spasmed as you started to squirt. Your eyes squeezed shut as you arched up as the pleasure swept through your body. You were just about to come down from it when you heard the vibrator come on and then he was being held just over your clit, barely ticking the surface of your throbbing little bundle. You were panting now just whining pitifully as your little clit was vibrated so quickly. Next thing you knew, two of Harry’s fingers were sinking into your pussy and stretching you out. You swore your eyes crossed as he curved his fingers up and prodded at your g-spot a few times before you were moaning obscenely again as your cum gushed out of your entrance.

“Fuck yeah, angel. Squirt again for me. You can do it, baby. You can give me another one. One more for, daddy.” He grunted as he poured his fingers into you at a more determined pace until you were squirting a bit more for him. He eased into a stop before pulling his fingers out and sucking them clean and then leaning down to kiss you. “Mmm…you’re so perfect, baby. Look at you.” He mumbled in amusement, “I even missed how you taste.” He mumbled against your lips and you smiled and pecked his lips. “How are you feeling?”

“Good.” You replied with a soft smile.

“Promise? Went a little hard on you there.” He said and you nodded.

“Promise. I didn’t use our word.” You reminded him and he nodded.

“That’s right, angel.” He hummed.

“I actually have something in mind…” you started and he nodded, urging you to continue. “What if tonight we see if I can go under?” You asked and you saw the sparkle in his eyes but then he glanced away.

“Ummm…that’s kind of…opposite of what I wanted this time to be.” He admitted with a soft chuckle, “But if that’s what you want, then I-”

“Wait. No, tell me more about what you…were expecting or…hoping for?” You requested and he smiled slightly as he pressed down and kissed you again.

“Thank you for wanting to listen to it.” He said and you smiled and nodded, “Well…I know that before I had…kind of tested the boundary of what was too intimate er whatever. And well…I want to…fuck you with…intention and care and…I suppose…love?” He got out and sighed shakily, “I ummm…I am in love with you. I just…realized it. I’m sorry!” He laughed nervously as he looked into your eyes and you were just beaming. You pressed yourself up and grabbed his face and guided it towards your own until you were kissing slowly with smiles on your faces.

“H.” You mumbled.

“Yeah, baby?”

“Let’s do it your way. Lets add a little affection in there.” You whispered and he smiled.

“Okay.” He whispered back happily, “Do you have condoms?” He asked.

“Let’s not use one.” You said and he kissed you quickly.

“Are you one the pill again?” He whispered his question and you shook your head.

“No.” You reaffirmed verbally and he kissed you again.

“So you’re playing with fire, are you?” He asked and you nodded with a smile. “I really like that.” He hummed smugly. “Gosh, I’ll have to fuck you everyday until we find out you’re knocked up.” He said and you literally blushed as he grinned down at you smugly. “Would you like that, baby?” He asked you nodded quickly as he leaned down and kissed you as he reached down for his cock and positioned it at your entrance.

“Fuck, push it in.” You panted and he dropped his weight into his hips and surged forward until your little hole gave way and parted for his long, thick cock to sink in until his full, heavy balls thudded against your bottom. He ground his hips into you, the tip of his cock kissing your cervix and g-spot with every swirl of his hips until he pulled out and then sunk back in again. By the third one you were starting to tremble.

“That’s good for you, angel?”

“Yes…you feel so fucking good, baby!” You panted as you were brought to the edge and then let back down as he drew out from you. You were tingling in anticipation of feeling him thrust back in. “I love you so much…” you exhaled and he was suddenly feeling all warm and gooey inside.

“Fuck, angel, I love you too…I’m not gonna last too long.” He confessed as he froze deep inside of you. “Get your vibrator for me. Right on your clit. Wanna feel you coming on me one more time.” He said and you were quick to comply. You had it on a lower setting but given your sensitivity level you were starting to reach the edge quite quickly. Specially with Harry pounding away inside of you. You were moaning in time with the even paced grunts rumbling from his chest and the smacking sounds of your centers colliding over and over and over again. Your vision started to go hazy as you blinked up at him before your eyes squeezed shut as you started to come. You could feel your walls throbbing hard around his cock and you wanted nothing more than to feel his warm load filling your pussy.

“Come inside me, daddy!” You begged and he groaned and gave a few more determined thrusts before he was stilling deep inside of you, his hand pressing down on your tummy, you could feel the weight of him over his own cock inside of you. Something about that had you losing your mind and extended your orgasm as you felt him spilling into you.

“Fuck, baby…that’s all yours, angel. M’all yours. Take all my fucking cum.” He grunted deeply, you felt the deepness of his voice rumbling through your body as he ground into you with intent as he came deep inside of you.

It stole your breath as you started to come again as both of your most vulnerable areas were being stimulated so gloriously. You didn’t mean for it to happen, but your vision started to tunnel and all the sounds around you were muffled as your head just rolled back and you closed your eyes and smiled as this gorgeous cocktail of THC, several orgasms, and sub space collided together in the most chaotic and serendipitous way. Your orgasm seemed to be affecting each of your main body parts one by one, you felt it in each leg, in your tummy, chest, and arms, and then your head. You were floating, you were living in ecstasy, riding the wave for as long as possible. You blinked your eyes open slowly as Harry rested over you and kissed you with tenderness when he saw you floating off in some warm and fuzzy place.

“You’re safe, angel. Safe with me. Love you so much.” He whispered as he kissed all over your face. You locked your legs around his hips, trapping his body against yours snugly, “Fuck yeah, baby. Keep me inside…” he moaned as your walls continued to pulse around him steadily.

He held you nice and tight, keeping your warm under his body heat. It was then that you realized that you’d left the window opened…you hoped your neighbors hadn’t heard anything, but there was a very slim chance of that being the case. And just like that, the tingle feeling and tunnel vision started to fade and you were slowly descending back into reality. When you felt the strength return to your body, you hugged him back and he sighed happily as he planted another kiss to your cheek.

“Are you alright?” He asked lowly as he glanced down at you and you smiled and nodded. “Use your words for me, angel. Y’know that.” He reminded.

“Sorry, I’m still a little loopy.” You whispered, “But yeah, I’m alright. Just cold.” You said and he tutted.

“Forgot to close the window. Can I get up?” He asked and you shook your head.

“Not yet. Stay close.” You whined and he smiled as he pushed himself up a bit and ran his thumb over your kiss-bitten bottom lip affectionately. It was something small, but in the past you would’ve just let him go and it would’ve all been done.

“Did you ever think about…being like this with me before?” He asked and you nodded.

“Of course. It just wouldn’t have been fair for either of us to give in. It feels so good to just…hold you.” You breathed out in relief and he smiled and kissed your lips quickly.

“Yeah angel, it does.” He agreed as he smiled down at you.

After a few more minutes of being cuddled up together, you felt more yourself again so you assured him that you could get up now so that you guys could get cleaned off and dressed again. He was helping you get your comforter and sheets off so you could switch them out. You watched him check your mattress really quick to ensure you hadn’t soiled it when you came so hard so many times. It was sweet and so endearing of him, it made you feel all soft for him and you weren’t ready for this to be over.

“D-do you want to stay?” You asked him timidly and his face lit up as he smiled and nodded.

“Wait.” He smirked, “Not gonna make me stay on my side of the bed, are you?” He questioned playfully and you laughed as you shook your head.

“I don’t think we need to have sides since I’m not sharing you with anyone else anymore.” You replied with a small grin.

“That’s…very fair.” He chuckled bashfully and you giggled.

“I’m just teasing.” You assured.

“I know, angel.” He smiled.

“Do you wanna have a shower?” You asked and he nodded. You quickly changed your sheets and comforter before heading towards the shower. “We can share, just make sure you don’t get my hair wet.” You warned as you pulled him along.

You were soon nice and clean, the both of you shivering as you pleaded with him to go close the window once and for all. It wasn’t hard to persuade him, all it was was a flash of your boobs to have him dashing across your bedroom to shut the window and keep out the cold. You quickly got dried and dressed before you cuddled up into the bed. You were both shivering as you adjusted to the temperature. You kissed his chin, cheeks, and lips a few times. His arm was draped over your waist, fingers barely grazing over your lower back. There was something on your mind that you really just wanted to clarify with him. “H, so…earlier when you said you wanted the opportunity to…be more for me?” You trailed off and he nodded, “Did you mean that?” You asked and he nodded.

“I do. I want that with you.” He confirmed. “Do you want that with me too?” He asked and you nodded.

“Yeah, I really do. I just umm…I have a doubt.” You explained and he frowned a bit.

“Look, I-I hope you know that…what we had, that’s not something I’ve done before.” He said and then he frowned a little bit, “Actually, I have cheated before…but it was just a drunken kiss with a random person on a night out and I came clean right away.” He rambled, “I felt awful about it. Still do! But I wouldn’t ever cheat on you. It’s not like a compulsion or anything like that, where I can’t control myself.” He continued rambling nervously. When you grabbed his face he blinked a few times and went silent.

“Hey, I trust you.” You said softly and his nervous gaze softened, “I made a choice too with you. What we had was not just your fault; sure you initiated but I didn’t turn you away. And while it was wrong, I mean, I can’t say it was a mistake because, honestly to me, being with you has never felt like a mistake.” You elaborated your point of view and he smiled upon hearing you say this to him.

“Do you…regret it?”

“Not really. I still find value in what we had before…I learned a lot about myself and what I’m capable of. I mean, I have also had a drunken kiss with a friend while dating someone else but I never really thought of that incident as cheating, I got carried away, you know? It wasn’t anything premeditated or that I thought of or even considered doing sober, so it was just opportunistic. I came clean the very next morning when I saw my partner and he didn’t think of it as cheating either. He actually…laughed in my face at that.” You recalled with a smile and he chuckled. “I guess my point is that, we’re all capable of less than savory things, but what matters is how we come out of it. And I think that what we did…it helped us to learn to trust each other in a way that we might not trust most people in our lives.”

“Yeah, that’s true.”

“Do you…feel regret for what we did?” You asked him.

“I think I did at some point, especially after your aunt’s birthday. I just saw how insecure I had made my ex feel, you know? But hearing you say that you don’t has changed my answer. I only regretted the fact that the situation was hurting everyone involved. Not the sex or the things we shared and the friendship and trust we strengthened through those times. I’m quite glad we had that with each other. But the fact that I wasn’t really treating either of you fairly or myself is my biggest regret.” He explained and you nodded in understanding. “Ummm, so if your doubts are not fidelity related what are they about?” He asked.

“Just about the timing of everything. Like, you just ended a relationship and I don’t want you to feel like you need to jump into anything with me right away t-to prove how you feel about me. Like if you need time to be single or something…like, I want you to know that that’s cool with me too.” You explained. Obviously, you wanted to jump in, you’d been waiting for him for so long, but if he wasn’t ready yet, then you’d wait, like you promised him a while ago.

“Well first off, I do want to be in a relationship. So I am ready for it. More than.” He assured you, “I just wasn’t with the right person before, that’s all. And well…I think we’ve both waited long enough for this opportunity to be together and if we both want it, why wait?” He reasoned and you bit your lip to try and suppress your smile. “What?” He chuckled.

“Nothing…I just umm…” you bit your lip and then readjusted yourself so that he was spooning you and then you interlocked your fingers with his. You relaxed almost immediately and let yourself melt into his warmth. “I’ve wanted you to hold me like this for a really long time.” You hummed happily.

“So have I, angel.” He sighed before kissing the side of your head, “Thank you for waiting for me. You really didn’t have to.” He whispered and you smiled.

“Of course I did! I love you.” You whispered back, “That’s why I waited.” You explained with a smile.

“Oh, I love you so much.” He responded as he squeezed you a little tighter before kissing your head once again. You smiled in his embrace, relaxing more and more as the realization sunk in that this was your life now and you couldn’t have asked for a better outcome than this.

“Hey…” you whispered.

“What is it, baby?”

“You’re gonna keep this mullet thing you have going on for a bit, right?” You asked and he sniggered.

“If you like it that much then yes. I’d keep it for you.” He confirmed through a chuckle.

“Okay, good.” You hummed, “It’s fucking sexy.” You added softly and he grinned.

“You think so?” He chuckled.

“I certainly do.” You assured.

“Enough that if we got married I could have this hair, then?” He asked.

“Oh, for sure…so much so that they’d probably have to have the reception without us.” You said smugly.

“Baby…” Harry groaned, squeezing your hip just a bit and you smiled.

“You still have free reign you know…” you hummed and he hummed as he nuzzled up against your ear.

“You’re in for a long night, angel…” he hummed darkly.

“Do your best, daddy.” You grinned.

Magnetic extra^ (wc 2.4k)

---- Tag List ----

@sunshinemoonsposts @anotherdudetteinthisworld @matildasatellite @sad-avocado @sunflovverharry @cherrysulewski @daphnesutton @gurugirl @reveriehs @ottawaoutlander @jessitpwk @permanentllyharry @here4thefanfics @slutfortigertattoo @angelbabyyy99 @freedomfireflies @behindmygreyeyes @justlemmeadoreyou @jarofstyles @harryssattelitestomper @gem1712 @you-guys-should-aww @wannawhispa @acesofspadess @unknown7549 @babegoalsreads @fkinavocado @lillefroe

847 notes · View notes