#but let's be reasonable ladies it's been 4 years

[marvelmaven]

Broken But Brave, Pt. 15

This is my first attempt at a fic, so encouragement and kind advice are welcome. Let me know what you think!

Bucky Barnes/Original Fem! Character

Set in an AU where Tony DOESN'T die after End Game and Steve is actually with Bucky till the end of the line.

Summary: Bucky is going through therapy, consulting with the Avengers, but not interested in living under Stark's roof, for reasons he thought should be obvious to everyone. On his way home to his Brooklyn apartment, he bumps into his new neighbor, a petite, self-proclaimed cat lady. But he notices something about her that will have him keeping his eye out.

Trigger warning: References to Domestic Abuse (Not Bucky)

Not the most exciting chapter, and too little Bucky, but much-needed plot development so things can start kicking into high gear. Next one will be very Bucky-heavy.

Kind of turning into two idiots in love, lots of fluff

Part 15/?

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14

Lori stood awkwardly at the sink, scrubbing away at the dishes leftover from making breakfast,  as James was dragged off to go spar by Steve. She was sure that Steve wanted to get James alone to talk, probably about having her (a civilian that may have once pepper sprayed herself while practicing with the self defense tool) at the Tower along with her large cat with a bigger personality. During breakfast they had been discussing what to do about this new group ‘The Flag Smashers’ and Lori felt utterly lost, although she definitely agreed with Sam, they had a stupid name. 

“That intel is highly confidential, by the way,” Tony grinned as he dried the dishes she passed him, “but I have a feeling you’re not going to be posting about it on your socials.”

Lori laughed as she scrubbed the pan that had had the bacon on it, glancing sideways at him, “definitely not, I don’t really use my socials all that much.” She paused while washing a pan, looking at him soberly, “the leader is only 19 years old?” She shook her head, sadly, “It sounds like she’s had a very hard life, and, I mean, I disagree with her methods, but it’s admirable that she sees how the system has failed her, failed so many, and is fighting back.” Embarrassed, Lori attacked the pan with a vengeance. What input that she offered could be of any help.  

Tony didn’t say anything for a while as she washed and he dried, but eventually he said, “The systems in place don’t work for a lot of people, huh?” Lori looked at him carefully, as he continued, “I read your records, well, yours and uh, Daniel’s”. Lori turned her attention to the waffle iron, it was crusted with part of the burnt waffles that Nat had insisted on. The spy was silent behind them, but clearly listening. Eventually Tony continued, “It’s standard for anyone coming here, not personal, but seems like you were failed by the system too.” 

Lori finishing getting the last piece of burnt batter off of the waffle iron and rinsing it. She passed it to him, before saying, “I realized eventually, no one was going to come and save me, I needed to save myself. Then, I realized I needed to be smart about it, because if I failed getting out again…I was sure he’d kill me.”

She didn’t know why she felt comfortable opening up to Tony, as aloof and eccentric as he seemed, he also seemed to genuinely care or Nat, who had been offering her support since last night. The spy was fierce, but she was also kind. 

“I really appreciate you opening your home up to me, Mr. Stark. I know I said it already, but thank you. I just wish I didn’t have to make a million phone calls today, and I should probably at least head over to my place to salvage what I can.” Lori sighed, hanging her head for a moment, before picking up another plate coated in maple syrup and scrubbing it clean under hot, soapy water.

“First, Mr. Stark was my dad, call me Tony. No thanks are necessary, and you don’t have to worry about all of that today. I had Friday get a copy of your police report and she has your ex tagged, monitoring movement and online search activity.  I sent Happy to your place with his security team, they’re taking care of the insurance stuff and salvaging whatever they can. They also are adding some cameras and security to your place and your building. Hope it’s fine if we put your stuff in Barnes’s place. ” 

Lori was staring open mouthed at Tony, completely forgetting about the waffle iron, “why are you doing all of this for me?”

“It’s not just because of Barnes,” he said, meeting her eyes and answering the thought she hadn’t vocalized, “I have the resources, so why not? I have a foundation for things just like this, named after my Mom. It was…it was hers originally, mean to help and advocate for women in these kind of circumstances.” The air was heavy with his admission, and Lori bit her lower lip. 

“I have to say, it's been sweet watching you and Barnes together,” Nat finally spoke up from behind them, packaging up the leftovers into the fridge and brewing more coffee. They seemed to drink it constantly, a lifestyle that Lori could certainly get behind. “When he first came back from Wakanda, he was just like a shell of a person, pardoned and free but drifting. He’s been a lot more anchored since he met you, his personality is popping out more.”

“Seriously,” Tony added laughing, “I now get where Cap got his sass from.”

“James said that Steve always had a big mouth, it’s just that now he has the muscles to back it up.” Lori offered, smiling. “Their friendship is really something.” 

“He seems to think you’re really something too,” Nat turned, raising an eyebrow at her. 

Lori’s cheeks warmed, nodding, “I am so thankful that I ended up moving in next door to him.” And that was the truth, wasn’t it? Two broken people, helping to mend the chinks in eachother’s armor, finding camaraderie and common ground after experiencing two very different, but overwhelming and all consuming hells. James had obviously been through far worse, he had told her how Hydra had forced him to kill for them, and although he was under their control and had no idea who he was, he now remembered each and every person he had harmed. The guilt of that was such a heavy burden, but Lori didn’t want him to have to bear it alone, as he seemed insistent on doing. Maybe just talking to her about it, when he chose to, maybe that was enough. Holding his hand when the world and the guilt were overwhelming. 

“He was a bit odd when I first met him," she admitted, "he just took this enormous pile of boxes I’d been wrestling with like they weighed nothing, but I guess to him, they didn’t, but then he was just chatting about the bodega and how the pizza tasted bad after a certain time and walked with me there. I didn’t realize he was accompanying me to scare off the group of guys that used to sit on their stoop catcalling women, until we were almost home.” Lori smiled, “he didn’t even know me, but doing that was such a kindness.” 

Lori had finished washing the last plate and went to hand it to Tony who was standing exchanging bemused glances with Natasha, “I guess we have the friendly, neighborhood ex-assassin now in Brooklyn.” He finally took the plate, drying it and putting it away. 

“I guess we do,” Nat agreed, “You know, you make him…softer. Steve said he’s been acting more like himself since the beginning of October.” 

Lori flushed, pink tinging her cheeks as she smiled, “he’s very good company, and Marvin actually likes him, I was worried for a while that he didn’t like men after…after my ex.” 

Could her bar have had been any lower? Daniel, in hindsight, had been obsessive, creepy, stirring up problems with her friends to isolate her and keep her alone, and without hope. She felt a new heat rising in her chest, not fear, but anger and determination.

“Mr…Tony, I need to make a few phone calls to the clinic to let them know what’s going on as well as to a lawyer I’ve been looking into recently.” Lori’s voice was calm and strong, she was no longer terrified of Daniel, despite what had happened to her apartment, she radiated a calm similar to the eye of a hurricane, that singular, powerful strength that women possess when they have embraced their feminine rage, planted their feet firmly, and said ‘enough is enough, you have no power over me’. 

Tony and Nat exchanged a look, the spy smiling, and then Tony pulled out a phone from his back pocket, “you can have this, it’s the newest Stark-tech.” He slid it across the counter to her and picked up his own tablet to resume whatever it was he was working on.

Lori thanked him, bayed goodbye to him and Nat, and then walked to her rooms, shutting the door quietly. She stole herself, trying to prepare for the explanations she needed to offer her colleagues to ensure not only her safety, but their own. Daniel was escalating, and the last thing she wanted was for anyone else to get hurt. She noticed her hands were shaking slightly, and took several deep breaths. It was time. 

Her colleague, Conrad, picked up on the first ring. 

“Hey Lori, you cooped up for the weekend with your handsome neighbor? Amanda can’t stop talking about closing last night.” Conrad joked, “what can I do you for?” 

Lori laughed nervously, heart thumping in her chest, “Uh, well actually, I need to let you know about a potential security concern at the clinic…” 

Conrad was silent for a moment and Lori took a deep breath, “You know how I just upped and moved out of Manhattan? It was to get away from an ex. Please let me know if you need me to stop, but he was…not a good guy, and I need you to understand.” Lori admitted to Conrad about the abuse, the physical, mental, and emotional, and tried her damndest to make him understand just how dangerous Daniel was becoming.

“Lori, I’m so sorry that happened, had I known, I would have booted at least one of the dogs off the couch for you and Marvin to crash til you got on your feet.” Conrad’s voice was deep with concern “or Henry out of the bed.”

She was silent on the phone, tears welling in her eyes, but she took another breath and continued, “Thank you, Conrad, that means, that means a lot. He had me so isolated that I had to just take what I could, run, and rebuild, but last night, he broke into my apartment and absolutely trashed it. My neighbor, the one Amanda has been going on about, took me to stay with some of his friends until we have a plan for me to get back into my home, but we need to talk about security.

After a pause, he added softly, “I had no idea you were going through this; you’re always so cheerful and convivial, no matter what.” 

“I’ve been…I’ve been embarrassed to let anyone know what’s going on. I don’t want to drag my personal life drama into my work. Honestly, once I start working with our patients, I forget what’s been going on, but things have reached a point where he’s escalating, and I need you to take steps to make sure the people and pets at the clinic are safe.” Lori wiped away a stubborn tear that had insisted on rolling down her cheek, “even if that means I need to look somewhere else for work…”

“Girl, are you kidding me?” Conrad was dismayed, “you’re one of the best veterinarians I know, you’re amazing with the pets and manage the owners like no one else. There’s no way we’re letting you go over some jerk. I want you to take the week, sort out your stuff, and then you can start up again the following Monday. Shit, it’ll already be November.” 

“But, my patients–” Lori began alarmed. 

“Henry and I will take on the extra load, you focus on getting back on your feet.” Conrad was firm. 

So, they came up with a plan. They'd pivot Lori to established patients only upon her return, instruct the front desk not to release her name to anyone, and remove her page from the website (which she hadn't even realized had been posted) immediately.

“Thank you,” Lori finally managed, voice quiet and soft, “I really appreciate it.” 

“Anytime, and you still owe us for a night out with drinks. Bring your new man, neighbor, whatever you’re calling him, and we can have a fun time out once this is over.”

Lori nodded at the phone, then realizing he couldn’t see her, “of course, and I’ll try to talk James into it, he can be a bit of an introvert.”

“Sounds like a plan, getting introverts out of their shell is Henry’s calling in life. Take care, can I keep this number in my phone if I have to reach you?” he asked, seemingly remembering at the last second. 

“Y-yeah, a friend of James lent this to me for the time being. I’ll let you know if anything changes, and if there’s an emergency, let me know.” Lori smiled, relief washing over her. 

“Talk soon, stay safe,” Conrad added before disconnecting the call. Lori put the phone down and breathed a sigh of relief, head in her hands. 

[teenagefeeling]

you should never ever do what i just did but i got morbidly curious and looked up that person from those twitter sceenshots and holy shit, god damn. so they're like really, really obsessed with covid (and just physical health in general. there's a lot to unpack there but they don't believe mental illnesses exist they just think they're all physical, they also seem to have a fixation on veganism and its potential health impacts) and im ngl it did kinda get me thinking about people who are just like, not recovering from the health paranoia of peak covid.

obviously the illness itself is still going around and people are still getting very sick from it, and to be frank i wish there was still a little more of a strict protocol around sick leave and mask usage when you do have an illness (whether that be covid or anything else, having a guaranteed period of time where your employer or school or whoever had to accomodate you legally was objectively good and im mad that it seems to have gone away) but the idea of still being so fucking paranoid about it that your social media feed is 80% covid-related is wild to me. it was that scary at first but at a certain point you unfortunately kind of have to accept that certain things are out of your control and no matter how many precautions you take, at the end of the day it's literally an airborne disease. being safe is commendable, but fixating on the mere possibility of getting sick to the point where you're not able to live a normal life or talk about other things is so concerning

[lovebvni]

a message from yourself.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚would you like to hear what the court has to say?

hello. by the time this post goes up, it will be my birthday. i feel like it’s always important to have a message from a version of yourself, higher or future, to move into another journey out the womb around this sun. in the past it has personally helped me adjust my mindset before stepping into another year.

now i’m not doing a crazy amount of piles. i’m doing 4. as always, this is a general reading. take what you feel applies to you, leave what does not. this is not legal or life advice. you have the right to do whatever you want in this life, and the next, and the past. i am not forcing you to take this advice or message. feel free to scroll.

now, please, center yourself by taking a deep breath, hold for three, and let it out. now, click below, and let the connection between the piles guide you. and don’t second guess yourself.

pile 1, the reach

six of swords, nine of pentacles reversed, the star, seven of wands reversed, three of pentacles reversed.

abracadabra — lady gaga

while shuffling, i heard “you’re changing your course.” maybe you’ve been on a path where it seems that your manifestations aren’t coming, and the exact OPPOSITE of what you ask has come instead. you feel betrayed by the universe, and you’re losing confidence in yourself and your abilities. you’re wondering if it’s even worth it to keep going, to have any hope, to even dwell on the thought you’re going to get better.

“why must you put yourself here time and time again?” is what i heard. i think this is your future self, the person you are to become. “you have so many blessings coming out this cloud of sorrow. why must you repeat what you’ve done?” “there are roads and rivers that are clear, that will heal you, that will help you grow, but you’re to afraid to go through a bit of fog. it will not kill you.”

you’re not standing your ground. are you going back to friendships that have been toxic? falling back that feels familiar? pile one, did you read the collective message i posted? this feels similar. the energy, the orange is coming through again. also blonde/blond. you may be someone who has blond/e hair or involved heavily with someone who does. anyways, you allow yourself, at any inconvenience to “give up”, or in some sense, “take a break” that’s indefinite and you come back, and this is specific what i heard “when you’re horny”… pile one oh my god. you’re letting your body guide you with no plan? you’re allowing yourself to pick up a passion because you feel like you can get some dick? then as soon as you don’t, on that first try, you give up...

i feel like this is a mindset you may have picked up from shifttok and took a tad too seriously. “when you get overwhelmed, take a break.” that is solid advice, of course, but you’re taking that break indefinitely. you don’t have a plan to come back, and the moment you do, it’s on a whim or half assed. you need to flip this mindset. that’s what your higher self is telling you. flip your mindset out of what people of the past told you. they are not serving you anymore. that was advice for the moment. it’s over now. this is a new moment.

i asked for closing messages for this pile and got six of wands, nine of wands and three of wands. your advice from this is look to the future, what that success could be, and hold it in your mind always. “if you can see it in your mind, you can hold it in your hand”. sure, you can use ovulation as motivation, but don’t let that be your reason to start. let it be a reason to keep going. in addition, build up to block yourself from your past. and every time you try to look at it, ask yourself “why am i trying to move forwards?” and “where am i supposed to be going instead?” you’re not supposed to fall back into the past. you’re not supposed to walk back to it, you’re supposed to move onward from it. it was a lesson, not a lifestyle. you have the opportunity to be on top of the world, pile one, why not take it?

pile 2, raindrops

king of cups, strength reversed, the world, two of cups, five of cups, seven of swords.

paint the town red — doja cat

okay pile two. you guys may be forgetful, i forgot four times what i was doing when shuffling these cards. you may have so many drs you’re focusing on as well, so the memories and connections get mixed up. i feel like you also get a lot coming to you at once a lot. punch after punch or blessing after blessing. or a mix of both. cards kept falling out like fully, and not to compliment myself, but i’m a pretty good shuffler and that doesn’t normally happen.

with the cards i pulled, it seems like you have a lot of baggage. your future or higher self is saying that “it’s okay to let go, it’s okay to lose.” i was reminded of something my pastor said, “sometimes God takes something our your hands to replace it with something better.” are you religious? or believe in higher powers/work with deities? a male/masculine deity, zeus, posiden, loki, dionysus, lucifer, they’re all coming through here. you could work with one or more of them. they’re asking you to allow things to fall out of your hands, as seven of swords depicts, and stop trying to pick them all back up. “you need your hands free for this” i heard. and “stop crying over what you lost, there is more to gain.”

the seven of swords and five of cups are just speaking to me in this reading. you try to carry all these things from where you were, to where you’re going. you don’t have room. you don’t have the time. and you get upset when they seem to be slipping through your fingers, through the cracks. they’re supposed to. you’re on new ground. your are shedding old skin. pile two, i know it’s uncomfortable, it’s really uncomfortable, but you need it in order to transform into your better self. the two of cups shows me that you’re going from a dirty cup to a clean cup. the dirty cups are the ones you need to let go, the ones you need to have washed, but if you hold onto them, that will never happen. what needs to be cleansed will never be cleansed if you “clutch your pearls” in offense.

listening to paint the town red, “my happiness is all of your misery.” i feel like your higher/future self is saying you’re going to gain so much from this. you’ve earned so much because of this moment, because you let go in the future… paul says in his writings to the corinthians, “i rejoice in my sufferings.” because you surrendered the past to the universe. you’re in your blossoming phase. you’re growing from this past energy, and coming out the dirt. you’re germinating, transforming, growing. are you an earth sign? a plant mom? outdoorsy? all could be significant. the world, as i see it, shows me you grow so much from this. everything is sunshine and brightness after this. all you need to do is surrender control. let go of this “pride” you have in your past! that isn’t… a good thing. having pride in what you once did and not in the accomplishments you make each and every day? you’re reading this pile right now, you connected to your intuition to get here, are you’re really going to celebrate your elementary school project of a turtle that you sculpted? really, pile two? that’s what you’re proud of? not your development, not planting the seed, not finally finding the ground you need to be in, but something you did in a different phase of life? no. you’re doing amazing now. celebrate that. you are alarming. say this in a mirror sometime today. “i am amazing. i am brave. i am strong. i can accomplish all things. i have faith. i have strength. i have drive. i grow each and every day.” it’s so important that you show yourself some love. lions also came out in three of these cards, so they may be important.

for closing messages i pulled ten of cups, two of swords, eight of swords reversed, the hanged man, and three of cups. you’re going to get love from this. the birthing pains are well worth it. perhaps you’ve been searching for love or feeling loved your whole life. you’re going to get that. “trust me” is what i heard. “have blind faith.” even if you don’t feel it now, you WILL get it. you WILL feel it. i can’t even like about this, pile two, your higher or future self KNOWS what they’re taking about. they pulled these cards out so fast. they want you to know it’s all working in your favor. trust yourself. trust your intuition, trust your mind, trust your soul. stay strong in that. 111. take a step back to change your perspective on things. meditate on it and perhaps spend time with friends or in a common community. (shameless plug, ren’s discord!?!) that could seriously help you see things clearly. yes, two of these cards have blindfolds on, but that’s because you’re being called to look INWARDS instead of OUTWARDS. the blindfolds are aiding you. they’re guiding you and helping you gain that blind faith. that’s why the hanged man is here, for you to change the way you see things, or as i heard “this shit.” be willing to let go of things that no longer serve you. dont hoard that energy. let it cycle back into the universe like its supposed to. i also keep hearing singing. that’s seriously important here. let your voice be heard, pile two. continue to celebrate yourself and your accomplishments. you are worth it.

pile 3, field of wishes

ten of wands, six of pentacles, page of cups, the empress, the sun.

alter ego — doechii

this is like my third time doing this pile so three’s may be significant, the phrase “this can’t be it,” and not accepting… something. carrying burdens from the past. this pile has been all over the place. the ups, the downs, the past, the future, the present… you’re carrying so much with you. you don’t need to carry the baggage of others, pile three. that is not your job. that is not your duty. you’ve been walking this path for so long, these people that you have met, that are now gone from your life, taught you a lesson. that lesson has gone, now. that lesson IS gone now. why are you still trying to learn from it? these burdens are no longer yours. you’ve got what you needed from them.

you need to sacrifice these to the universe. hold them out, look at them, and drop them into the sea. accept the fact you have learned these lessons. you don’t need to repeat them, you’re doing amazing. you have found your ground, your foundation, you have found you. you don’t need to edit that, you don’t need to change that. “the seeds are now sprouting, i’m no longer doubting” from melanie martinez’s pluto. perhaps planets and portals are important to you? this is the second time they’ve come up in this reading.

i’m getting the urge to tell you to “look inwards.” again, third time this has come up. look inwards instead of outwards. look at your inner child. look at your growth, look at your past one last time to let it go. drop it. you’re allows to. it’s no longer yours. you’ve healed what you needed to. just be grateful that you have gone through these lessons, these cycles, and be glad you’re out of them. you no longer have to be overwhelmed with them. “a severed head can no longer speak.” graphic, but okay spirit! you may be into the darker things in life and try to get the most out of them. that’s why you’re still carrying so much, because you want to make sure you’ve grasped everything you could from them. well, i’m here to remind you that self care is self respect, and self respect is knowing when to leave something behind. 666, look back, don’t go back.

while attempting to shuffle closing messages, for the third time, my deck has been facing each other. and it’s half and half. “standing face to face with i told you so.” chappell roan’s good luck, babe. have you been told this before, pile 3? has this been something lingering on your mind? i get the sense this is a very spiritual pile, and i appreciate that, but you’re being called to listen to yourself and nurture yourself more TO yourself more, and not to others. focus on you!!!

for actual closing messages, you have been given five of pentacles, ten of swords reversed, the hermit, eight of swords reversed, eight of wands, two of wands, and seven of wands. once again, the urge to look for the light within you. “nah nah nah nah nah, boom boom, bitch” from your channeled song keeps coming to mind. there’s something taunting you, as you feel. find it. look for it. grab it by the hand and lead it to a pond, let it drown there. again with the dark stuff oh my GOD. don’t let this energy form your past suck you in. you’re allowed to move forward from it. recognize this isn’t a fight, this isn’t a battle, it’s a surrender on their end. they have no more ammunition, and when you allow them close again only to push them off a cliff, you win. you win, pile 3. you have won. accept that. you have broken these chains, these ropes, these bounds that you have allowed to hold you for so long without refinishing, they aren’t locked. they aren’t tied together. in yourself, you have everything. your heart guides you. you have found it. run with it, and keep running. don’t stop. never stop. you are where you’re supposed to be. drop the past you no longer need. poetry and song writing is prominent, if you couldn’t tell. :)

pile 4, flee but be free

seven of wands, the tower reversed, four of cups reversed, death reversed, the artist.

eyes on me — asteria

while shuffling there was one card faced up, the empress. i decided not to put it in the reading, but this pile knows who they are. they know where they stand. they know where they want to be. they know how to get what they want. they are what they want. i also kept wanting to type a period between each card. they each felt very important, and three major arcana here. you may feel called to be uprooted. that’s what the tower reversed is telling me. but you, pile four, you’re refusing it. you’re struggling to fight the change. to see the light. i feel like you’ve been refusing this for a long time, an ego death. you feel you don’t need it. you feel you’ve gone through it. that’s where the empress comes in. this isn’t a real stability, rather it’s one you’ve built based on your god mindset of yourself, but you have never gone through the challenges you needed to to get there. i heard your “canon events.”

you just put yourself in the throne. marie antoinette came to mind, and we know how her story ends. your higher or future self is urging you to step out of this. to “open your eyes to see the truth.” raye’s genesis comes to mind, “i see a sad little sinner, in the mirror.” your higher self is looking back at you. you’ve built up a guard, a wall, that only you can see. one that you have fooled yourself and others into believing you have. there is so much resistance to change here, to growth, pile four. your higher self feels so disconnected from you. they feel like they’re talking to a brick wall when speaking to you. you ignore the lessons they try to teach you. the ones they know you will go through in order to grow. “to get to the top of the tree, to have to climb it.” eventually, you will see there is no other choice, that you’ve taken all other paths, and you have to go down this final one. this one will lead to your growth. this is your destiny.

for your closing messages, pile four, i feel like Genesis by Raye is a song you truly need to listen to, analyze, and find where you stand in it. there are three parts, the longest is the second. she’s stuck in cycle over and over. i feel this is where you stand, but you need to understand that is where you are. in the cards you have 10 of pentacles, ten of swords, eight of swords, page of wands, five of cups, and strength. your higher self is assuring you this is all worth while. you already know who you are, you just need to baptize yourself in that. spend some time alone, and think. you may feel lost after reading this. you thought you were doing great, and now you’re left in an empty field. do not sulk, please. cry, though. just for a moment, until you notice there is more for you. then take risks. take risk after risk until you finally get out of this need for control all the time. i keep seeing sign spinning/baton twirling. maybe that’s something you’re into? try it!

take it step by step. be patient with yourself. like really, really patient. know this isn’t going to last forever and you already have all the tools you need to build. now is about laying that foundation. and it is a lengthy process. but “it is very worth it.” never doubt yourself nor abilities during this time. that’s where this five of cups is. you may fall down ten times, but you can and will get up eleven.

[igotanidea]

Just right: Anthony Bridgerton x reader

part 1 to too much

part 2 : not enough

part 3 : almost there

part 4: Stuck

A/N: I am NOT sorry for all the possible spellings and punctuation mistakes there. It's been almost 2 months since "Stuck" and I am FREAKING OUT posting this while crying because it's over. Enjoy and thank you <3

Warnings: end of series, 4082 words (!!)

***

He felt like a fool.

Reverting to his old ways instead of showing all the emotions coursing through his veins.

Turning around and walking away, leaving her alone, when all he wanted was to fall to her knees and beg for forgiveness.

But how would the viscount Bridgerton look, while doing so, observed by all the ton, including the two biggest gossipers in the person of lady Featherington and lady Danburry?

Seemed like whatever he would choose to do, he would end up being a dolt.

“Anthony!”

He didn’t even flinch hearing someone calling him, nor recognize the voice. Too stubborn to stop he only continued his marching pace, hoping for the love of god that whoever dared to try and approach him in this furibund mood would get discouraged.

Not very gentlemanly of him.

“Anthony!”

He quickened his pace.

“Anthony Bridgerton!”

“What?” he almost spat spinning around on his heel, leaving a dent in the ground, taking on his most stern expression. If his obvious ignorance of the caller was not a deterrent perhaps the frown and fiery eyes would.

Supposedly it might have worked on anyone else, but soon enough Anthony transformed from the head of a family and the viscount into a little child, upon noticing that it was his mother, exhorting him to the halt.

“Mother…” he muttered looking at the ground, having only confirmed his previous theory of his role in this entire disarray.

“Let us take a walk.” Violet smiled brightly taking her eldest’s arm and imposing a walking rather than soldierly pace. “What did you Anthony?” the gentle expression never left her face even when she was scoffing her unmanageable child.

“Why would you think it was me that--?” the viscount took the last resort to protect his own pride, but the tightening grip on his forearm betrayed the fact that Violet knew the entire backstory, behind the marital disagreement.

“I raised you. I daresay it gives me enough knowledge to not answer your question. “

“If you let me –"

“Don’t, Anthony. Y/N has been nothing less but charming since the beginning.. "

"That's the way to describe her--" the man muttered

"Strong-willed and persuasive, surely, you wouldn’t take anything but, but charming nonetheless. So do tell me so we could remedy the damage before it arises further.”

“Shall you mistake me for Daphne and ask about my feelings—”

“Anthony Bridgerton!”

“I am a man, mother. A head of the family.”

“Clearly said head has been missing guidance in the right direction.”

“Mother!”

“Do not raise your voice on me son.”

“Apologies…”

“Good.” Violet beamed serenely “Do you think me so little knowledgeable to ask your emotions? I do not. I’m merely asking for facts, which you clearly have such a strong inclination to.”

Anthony mumbled something once more.

“do you wish you lose your wife, viscount?”

“What?” such possibility never crossed his mind. Y/N’s anger, her hurt, pain and merciless avoidance �� yes. Abandonment and lack of her presence nearby? No. She would never… She could never. Lord above, who was she thinking she was? A woman married into a noble family wanting to cause a scandal by resenting her husband?

And once again, while his heart should have been shattered and humble enough to clarify the turmoil, the sudden blood rush turned into clenched fists and ire. All because he could not bare the thought of losing her for good, however hiding behind all the negativity was easier. It was something he was used to for years.

Nevertheless it was impossible to deny the facts further. It was her influence that caused the improbable openness in his soul was the exact same reason of his spirit bleeding.

And he needed her back.

Each minute without her was a minute lost. A minute less in the so very limited time they were given as a miracle on earth.

“What do I do?” he raised gaze at his mother, now truly looking like a lost man. Man in love, who was probably not the most romantic and gentle one with words, but still deeply infatuated with the woman who gave her whole life to him.

“Do not fret my dear. We shall alleviate the situation immediately.”

***

Y/N’s feelings were beyond anything possible to describe with words.

There she was, with her feet rooted to the ground, wishing for – and willing to accept – apologies but met with the harsh reality of the stone wall of Anthony’s behavior.

Accompanied by Eloise, smirking like the know-it-all she was, and Benedict with the compassion written all over his face.

Presumably, shall they not be there, the young lady viscountess Bridgerton would abandon all the pretenses of a woman of her position and begun blubbering in the middle of the promenade. However, the most mischievous of Bridgerton siblings acted with wit and sense, involving their dear sister-in-law in a challenging conversation, capably hauling her away from prying eyes and gossipmongers, preventing any possible rumors about incongruousness.

***

For unmistakable reasons she was not in the mood to see their ludicrous older brother and with the sudden disappearance of Violet, Benedict and Eloise took the privilege to invite Y/N back to the Bridgerton’s family house and extend the invitation for indefinite period of time. After all, Anthony might have been the head of the family as he proudly announced to anyone who was willing to disobey his wished and/or not listen, but Benedict was the oldest bachelor of the house and was more than willing to make a few decisions of his own to finally be seen as something more than merely second son and waiting for his time. 

***

Violet returned home few hours later and accepted the presence of her daughter-in-law with a mysterious smile and not a single word of objection. As amazing and uplifting as such approach might have been, it was also highly surprising. Viscountess Bridgerton was well known for her mitigating skills and tendency to scotch conflicts almost immediately, especially in her own family.

And it raised a lot of questions and secrets that Y/N and Eloise tried to uncover spending the night in the former’s bedchambers, talking for hours, creating conspiracy theories and preparing for whatever may have been coming.

Cause the fact that Violet was going to help her oldest son in winning back his wife’s attention was more than conspicuous.

Only that Y/N, who was forgiving and accepting at the begging was slowly turning cold at the fact that her husband could not simply apologize but rather resorted to some intricate ways of regaining her favor.

After a year of marriage, should he not know her enough for independent ideas and not seek his mother's avail?

***

First thing happening in the very early morning, was Y/N’s most trusted servant humbly asking for her lady’s time, which was bizarre and – as any other family may have deemed – inadequate and even shaming.

Moreover, any other house would quickly discard the commoner showing at the mighty's doorstep but Bridgertons were prone to discarding rules in private and with those who earned their trust. Be it servants or nobles. And Y/N was no exception to the rule, welcoming her maid with a smile upon seeing the person from her own household.

“My lady.” The girl bowed so low, she almost touched the floor with her nose.

“My dear Laura, please stand up, there is really no need for that-“ Y/N grabbed her hands and forced the girl up. “I assure you that-“

“But Lady Violet and Miss Bridgerton –“

“I assure you that they do not expect you to kiss the ground they walk on.” Y/n almost laughed at Laura’s discombobulation. Poor one was doing everything in her power to not make her lady embarrassed and act like a good and obedient servant, almost expecting Violet or Eloise to be cruel and judgmental.

“Dear Y/N, did you give your helpers the idea that we are some sort of tyrants?” Violet send her daughter-in-law a honest smile, which immediately got Laura’s reaction in the form of blushing.

“Lady Bridgerton I apologies if my appearance is the dishonor on-”

She didn’t even finish the sentence, met with Y/N, Violet’s and Eloise’s laugh and a polite look from more balanced Francesca sitting on the chaise longue.

“Do not fret, my girl, we are more than happy to welcome you in our household.”

“Tha-thank you my lady…”

‘Now I assume you came to talk to your lady, so we shall give you some privacy. Come girls, make haste for the matter to cover is of utmost delicacy.”

“And how shall you know it mamma?” Hyacinth almost twitched her ears, not really understanding much of why Y/N was with them rather than with Antony, but curious as a young girl could be.

“Precisely mamma, how shall you know?” Eloise, immediately picked up her sister’s question, only not so susceptible to extenuations.

“Eloise Bridgerton, I shall expect you to practice the bowing before your incoming debut in front of the queen. Daphne made quite an impression and –“

“Daphne was deemed diamond of the season and such title is below my ambition.”

“Regardless, you do not want to trip or slip do you?”

Eloise (and everyone else) obviously remembered what happened to Featherington’s sisters and the embarrassment so with a heavy, exaggerated sigh and one quick, sharp, bright look at Y/N Eloise left the room, followed by her mother and sisters.

And once the lady and her trusted eyes and ears of the house were alone, who could stop the two of turning a lot more unmindful of societal norms?

“My lady, the lord has been quite annoyed since the quarrel you lordships have had. He even refused to eat his favorite meal.” Laura confessed with blushing cheeks

“Are you to tell me that Prescott prepared the roasted pork for Anthony after he was so unjust towards the lady of the house? I shall have a word about a loyalty with him upon my return.” Y/N satirized wholeheartedly.

“When shall you return my lady? Seeing as that viscount is not the one to have a change of heart and admit his wrongdoing easily?”

“He will Laura. One way or another I am fairly convinced my husband may take a long way to do so and take the aid of his mother whilst deciding. It’s just I am not fully convinced if the apology made with cheating are worth accepting.”

“Oh! You took the lower route here my lady forgive the audacity.”

“Just the route of a woman who expect honesty from her man.”

“Fair enough I suppose. But shall you be agitated my lady I take it you do not wish to accept the viscount bestowment?”

“Bestowment?” Y/N frowned a little in confusion “and what shall that be?”

“I do not know, my lady. I am merely a messenger—”

“I believed you to be on my side Laura.”

“And I am, my lady! But one do not object the command of the lord, that is clearly ready to vent his anger on the first soul that happen to be unfortunate enough to be around.”

“My god, you are a prattler!” Y/N laughed “where is that gift in question? Cause since it is mine either way we might as well get a little curious, shall we? Would be such a shame to put it to waste.”

Laura stood up from her chair and started heading to the corridor, but Hyacynth was first to barge into the room carrying some parcel that was almost bigger than her.

“Y/N! Is this that gift from Anthony!?” clearly she was eavesdropping  “Can we take a look, please? It’s so big I wonder what it is? Come on, open it up! Open it up!”

“Curiosity killed the cat.” Eloise muttered but there was no denying she was equally curious as her sister.

Y/N only rolled  her eyes, inviting all the girls over and opening the box. Fishing out the most beautiful and definitely expensive new dress. The color was perfectly matching Y/N’s complexion and the material delicate yet durable – Anthony knew his wife and her adventurous tendencies.

“It’s so beautiful and elegant” Francesca whispered touching the dress with delight.

“So what, he think he can just buy her the garment and she will forgive him?” Eloise scoffed “Men are so simple minded and belittling of women!”

“Try it on, Y/N!” Hyacinth encouraged, almost jumping from excitement

“Do not try it on! This would be relenting!” Eloise objected.

“He made a gesture!”

“It’s not a gesture! It’s an attempt of buying her forgiveness!”

“Y/N!”

“Y/N?!”

“Quiet!” Y/N finally managed to break through the noise of two sisters. ““No offence girls, but this is my marriage and my decision. One I have to make by myself. So thank you “ she smiled brightly but with a hint of annoyance “for your positions on things, but I am perfectly capable of weighting the significance of the gift, on my conviction to forgive or not forgive him.”

“Uhm. My lady” Laura cleared her throat “I’d like to elaborate that the viscount also made an invitation to one special place….”

“Do not go Y/N!”

“Stop interfering Eloise! Y/N you have to go!”

“For heaven’s sake, Violet is truly a saint for surviving you two!” “Uhm. My lady” Laura cleared her throat “I’d like to elaborate that the viscount also made an invitation to one special place….”

“Do not go Y/N!”

“Stop interfering Eloise! Y/N you have to go!”

“For heaven’s sake, Violet is truly a saint for surviving you two!”

***

Anthony was waiting for her in the garden outside some estate she had no idea existed. After all, Y/N has spent her entire life in London, rarely being invited to the cottage. And in this case it could have been used a leverage, not that he was aiming for measuring forces and cold calculation.

No.

He was walking back and forth, almost trampling a path in the ground in a place where it should never be. Nervous enough to anxiously fiddle with his fingers like a lady before her debut entering the society. Hoping she would come. Wishing for any entity in heaven might want to listen that she would take this dress he send her as an expression of humility rather than boosting like a rooster. Praying that Eloise wasn’t there with her sharp tongue and unrestrained thoughts to discourage his beloved from accepting both the gift and the invitation.

The minutes turned to hours and even his father’s pocket watch refused to work with Anthony in this important moment. Having no regard to the poor flowers any other plants standing no chances against his heavy riding boots, the time seemed to stand still.

For whatever it was worth it, Anthony Bridgerton swore to himself that he would rather turn into a sack of boned waiting in this desolate place than walk away while there was still a glimmer of hope she might appear. He was done and fatigued with missed opportunities, poorly chosen and ill-spoken words.

It was never his intention to said all those atrocious words to her.

Too much.

Dear Lord.

Now that he was thinking about it, his heart was capering in a way that filled him with self-hatred. After all the pain he might have caused her during that little hurtful exchange while she did nothing more than be there for him. Even if he not exactly wished for it. Even if he himself didn’t know that her presence in his life was the best thing that happened since his father’s death. If not since forever.

Anthony wasn’t the one to believe in signs or any spiritual influence on earth, but the more he was dwelling on his own misery, the more deliberative of their first meeting he was becoming.

It was late lord Bridgerton’s death anniversary and as any other year – he separated himself from the rest of the family. To show how adamant his heart and mind was and to underline that this was nothing more than just another day in a line of any other similar ones. But the truth was, he wanted to visit his father’s grave alone without any possible disturbances or havoc that his younger siblings could have caused. None of them really knew Edmund Bridgerton the way Anothony did. The first born son, the heir to the title, deprived of his father’s guidance and presence and forced to take responsibility for the family in way too young age.

He needed to be by himself, cause god forbid anyone seeing him showing any signs of humanity and indulging in grief.

And his family knew and accepted it.

She didn’t.

Just a stranger, strolling by herself in the area, looking like a commoner, having no regards to the sanctity of the moment nor the place she found herself in.

And worse for her – spotting Anthony in the never-seen moment of vulnerability written all over his face.

“Lord Bridgerton” she bowed in a way that showed that the savage, Anthony took her for, actually had manners. And that he knew him, but this was not so unexpected.

He only grunted in response to annoyed by an unfortunate set of circumstances that worked against her. The viscount himself was not going to bow to a girl that was clearly a servant, with messy hair and in a dress that was far from anything a woman, even of lower position should be seen in.

“Don’t you have anywhere else to be, girl?” he muttered under his nose, throwing daggers with his eyes.

“I’m sorry my lord but-“

“You should be sorry. I am convinced your lady nor your lord will be pleased with the fact that their service wanders alone in an area that does not belong to them!”

“Service?” Y/N smirked looking at him with amusement and twinkling eyes. And Anthony with his youthful energy and virility could not miss the fact that she was actually pretty.

“Yes, service.” He hissed at her “now get out of here girl, before you get yourself in far more trouble from me and end up on the street!”

“I shall-“ she obviously was not going to let anyone maltreat her like that, but her acuity wore up that very moment. She noticed the weariness in viscount’s eyes, noticed the monument nearby, and realized what day of the month it was.

“Forgive me, my lord.” She bowed in respect “I shall be on my way. And I shall not mention this meeting to anyone, hopefully wishing for you to forget my impertinence.”

She was gone as fast as she appeared, and Anthony thought to never see her again.

Until the next rout Daphne was attending, where he actually did.

Immediately realizing the scope of his previous mistake, upon learning that the service girl was in fact Miss Y/L/N, the youngest daughter of Lord Y/L/N. And met with another look of those glistening eyes and amused face expression. Forced to accompany her for the evening, since apparently Lady Bridgerton and Lady Y/L/N has made some arrangements for the future.

He was thinking it was all just a coincidence back then, but now he came to conclusion that it must have been his father who send this girl into his life. Knowing better than him that she would turn his ways around, challenge him, test him patience mercilessly and yet – that she would be the one to love him unconditionally and whom he would love with all his broken and unperfect self.

And the burden of possibility of ruining it all for them was even more overwhelming.

He clasped his hands behind his back, walking shorter and shorter distances, turning back more and more often, stuck in his belief that he would stay here as long as she didn't show up, even if -

“Anthony.”

Viscount spun around so abruptly it almost caused him falling to the ground.

She came.

She truly came.

It was like meeting her all over again, back in time, back next to his father’s grave.

Only she wasn’t looking like a servant girl now.

She was wearing the dress he sent her, looking not only like a viscountess, but like a queen herself. His queen. His wife. His love. His everything.

Her skin was radiant due to the color of the material (just like Violet predicted), cheeks flushed, hair done in perfect curls surrounding her face, bright like a sun.

“Y/N….”

“It was so unwise on your part viscount to call upon me and invite me into a wild place a woman like me should never step foot on.” She said sternly, but the everlasting and never changing glistening of her eyes betrayed her true intention “and perilous, may I say? Far from the city? Lady travelling alone? So many hazards awaiting me on the way.”

“Benedict and Colin were following your post chaise.”

“Oh I knew I heard someone laughing on the way. But my coachman brushed my concerns off!”

“Did you really believed I would send my greatest treasure into the wild without proper security?” Anthony took a few steps forwards, reaching for her hands and placing gentle kiss on her knuckles.

“Your brothers?” Y/N let him show the courtesy, but raised eyes in skepticism of the words.

“Believe me my lady, you should never underestimate the man of the Bridgerton house.”

“In what aspect my lord?”

“In every aspect, dear.” He looked deep into her eyes.

“Why did you ask me to meet you here?” Y/N quickly averted her eyes, because Anthony’s gaze were so full of passion, love and genuine remorse and apology she found herself falling into his charms. And this couldn’t have been so easy for him. “You sister discounselled me on coming here.”

“And yet, you came my lady.” Anthony reached for her chin and slowly, gently and with tenderness turned her face towards him so that their eyes had to meet again.

“Anthony I –“

“My love, I am sorry.”

“this is not—”

“Let me speak” he hushed her, not breaking eye contact. “I asked you here, because this is the very place where my father asked for my mother’s hand. Where he pledged her his undying love, support and loyalty. And you, out of all people in the world, learned how much I cherish my father’s memory and his legacy.

“Anthony-“

“Therefore, here I am. Standing in front of you, expressing my deepest condolences-“

“Oh, dear lord, Tony!” she cried out in frustration “stop using the words you would say to me if Lady Whistledown were nearby! Tell me how you feel!”

How he felt was not with words.

How he felt was expressed by the way he grabbed her by the waist and pulled her to his chest, capturing her lips in the searing but gentle kiss that conveyed more than any noble and dignified words of a lord could.

I love you.

By his strong arms encompassing her like a shelter from the storm.

I won’t ever let go of you.

By tender caress of her hair and back.

I will always cherish you.

By the way his lips were moving against her, whispering silent words understood only by two souls forevermore yearning for each other.

I am sorry.

She was the first one to pull back for air, reluctantly so.

“My love. My beloved.”

She smiled at him, connecting their foreheads, allowing his arms to tighten around her waist and waiting for what was coming next to assess the truth behind his words.

“Am I too much now?” she whispered

“You are always too much. To much for me to keep. To much for me to even wish and pray for. Too much of a blessing in my life. Too much in the best possible sense and—”

This time It was her who cut him off by a kiss, silencing anything else that might come from his lips. He was honest and sincere. And if he was trying to apologize by saying anything else and backing out on what he said back there she probably would not forgive him sensing manipulation. But this?

“I forgive you.” She whispered against his lips.

“Thank God.”

“Is this cottage inhabited or--?”

“No. It’s not. And I intend on taking advantage of it right this moment.” He grabbed her and carried inside bridal style, ready to not get back to London for at least a couple days.

(spoiler alert below)

I got a request for a fluff pregnancy fic.... <3

@pietrawebster @chrissisheadisinclouds @fuzzym4m4 @gloomysel @urfavnoirette @dd122004dd @milkbummm @bevstofu @taniasethi @syraxnyra @christinabae @pandoraneverland @bevstofu @topguncultleader @jana-jaeynneee @myaa21212121 @ziarah @cat-lockwood @leaf-rose-thorn @elissanatok @lily3450 @nervousmumbling @budugu @frickin-bats @sillyfreakfanparty @amberpanda99 @nycthophiliaa @myaa21212121 @bananaadeleigate @everybodystaycalm @fmhcatt @sankareatheundead @cat-lockwood @1potato2rulethemall @bloommart @lorinevv @taylorswars @jessiegerl @glocuseguardian3rd @angiieguevara @laurasdrey @jholiday @smailaway @some-random-stranger-007 @beckahhope @bookishtheaterlover7 @eclecticcollectioncloud @thingfromlove @dutifullyannoyingfox @kitkat14sblog @dancingandreadingwithv @heyits-zedo @superhighschoollevelnerd-blog1 @ben-has-arrived @kindaslightlyacidic @espressopatronum454 @miluiel1 @powellssaturn @jess4rush @krismdavis @yourgirlypop

[selenepsyche]

How to Get Away With Hypocrisy 101

Greetings everyone. Welcome to my class, "How to Get Away With Hypocrisy 101". In this class, we will be discussing how you can (somewhat) successfully get away with bad actions, such as bullying and harassment, and defend them using Hypocrisy! Thank you @aphrodicci & her friends/defenders for allowing me to use you as the perfect example for this case.

1. BE PROBLEMATIC

Now of course, there's no way for you to be hypocritical if you're not problematic silly! This can involve anything: racism, bullying, stealing, transphobia, homophobia, etc. In this case, @aphrodicci and some of her friends have been called out and exposed for harassing, bullying, manipulating, and lying on others for the past two years. This has resulted in people's reputations being ruined unfairly and being bullied off the platform, and out of a community that was supposed to be welcoming. Aphrodicci has also been exposed for making racist comments. You can see the screenshots and links below for proof.

Stalking and Lying on Zelda Exposing Zelda's Business SpiritStalking's Bias Ignorant Dismissal from SpiritStalking Racism and Bullying from Aphrodicci Lexa's Case My Harassment Lexa's Case #2

2. USE YOUR FRIENDS AS A SHIELD

This is one of the most important parts. If you wanna succeed in using Hypocrisy to get away with your misdeeds, it's important to have friends that you trust defending you, well.....loyal and smart friends. Unfortunately in @aphrodicci's situation, that was not the case, although it did work for a good while.

Every time someone went against her and called her out, she had people like @baeladimi defending her every time. But.....let's hope you don't have a friend like baeladimi for your sake. Remember how I stated that Aphrodicci got called out for racism? Well, she defended her by using unprovoked racist comments of her own! Clearly, that's not gonna make her case any better.....

What also makes Aphrodicci's case worse is that only her friends are defending her, and they're doing so by harassing people through anonymous inbox messages, creating posts with lies and unnecessary information, or making alt accounts (that are allegedly run by her friends) to harass people! Ladies and gentlemen, don't be like these people. (The "patientenclavesummoner" account was made just minutes after @daarlingdatura and I were arguing with and calling out Aphrodicci and @baeladimi . It has an offensive picture of Datura as its pfp. Coincidence? I think not.)

UPDATE: There actually might be a possibility that @baeladimi is actually......Aphrodicci? This is alleged, but this is an explanation from someone I know explaining the reasoning. Ladies and gentlemen, PLEASE don't make alt accounts to make it look like other people are defending you. This will make it harder to sell the hypocrisy and get people on your side, especially if you get exposed somehow!

3. ADVOCATE FOR AN IMPORTANT CAUSE FOR ADDED PROTECTION (OPTIONAL)

Now this part of optional! It's optional because all the other steps should already be going successful for you! But if you find yourself in a difficult position, or just need or want extra protection, advocate for an important situation or cause. Great examples include showing your support to certain charities, supporting LGBTQ communities, or speaking up for Women's Rights! In this case, Aphrodicci decided to use the war between Israel and Palestine, showing support to Palestinians, to gain sympathy points.

Now, I will say that you need to be careful when using this method, especially if you have a tricky situation on your hands like Aphrodicci. It'll be harder to convince people you actually care about and support the cause you're discussing. It could make matters worse and come off as performative activism.

4. USE HYPOCRISY AND LIES TO MANIPULATE OTHERS

Now, the final step that we have all been waiting for, IT'S HYPOCRISY TIME! Now is the time to gaslight the fuck out of people who don't believe you and try to call out your behavior. Guilt trip them, continue preaching high values and the causes you support (if any), defend yourself by acting offended, and flip the script. Using selective morality keeps others off-balance and in check.

Depending on how serious your situation is, this should work perfectly for you. Your friends and supporters should be defending you well, you should be defending yourself well, and being the most "iconic" manipulator you can be. But unfortunately in Aphrodicci's case, we see that this has begun backfiring immensely.

5. IGNORE

If this situation is out of control, people are coming at you from all sides, your manipulation tactics and lies failed, you're losing supporters, or you're being exposed, the best thing I can suggest you to do is ignore them and hope the drama will fade away. Of course, this will only make your situation ten times worse for not addressing it or apologizing. If you have to resort to this final step, well I'm sorry to say it.....but you have failed my class.

In all seriousness, the things that aphrodicci and her friends/defenders (bitdemonic, sydneymykah, spiritstalking, whoever tf else) have done within this community have been toxic, evil, fake, and insane as fuck. I did not make this for clout. I made this because this type of behavior in this type of community is something we shouldn't stand for. Racism, hatred, toxicity, doxxing, and harassing people through alt accounts and inboxes is never okay. That's some scary ass and evil ass shit.

We all have the potential to grow together and share our knowledge. There's room for ALL OF US. Myself, Lexa, Datura, and others did not deserve to be harassed or lied on. This is not the place for egotistical maniacs and spiritually sadistic people. You (aphrodicci) is crashing out and blocked me because the truth is being revealed and more people are calling you out. I have ignited a fire under yo ass.

dividers: @omi-resources

@ selenepsyche - All Rights Reserved

[coldilikeit]

Yandere Batfam x Camp half-blood (Neglected reader)

DC x Pjo

Part 6

This had like a huge timeskip

___________________________

It's been 3 months Since you decided to stay at camp

It's been so good, the camp is quiet, since it's school year right now, it's currently October, the weather outside doesn't really affect the camp but it's chilly, the good kind

Percy and Annabeth have been sending you photographs of their schools, since you can't go to school anymore

Because you're "dead"

Still even if you're not studying, no way you're gonna let them get ahead of you, so you spent an entire day carving an Athena statue

You got a bunch of food from the Cornucopia as offerings

Then you pray "Lady Athena, may you please guide me, I need books on grade 6 studies.... Please?"

For good measure you decided to place a drachma on the statue

"I- I want to study... And uhhh, I've never really prayed to a god before- I mean what kind of god would - okay going off topic, I want to learn because I don't want to feel helpless anymore, I've been there, never again, so if- you could help me... I'd appreciate it, but you don't have to if you don't want- sooo... Yeah I guess, do I say amen? Um bye"

"didn't think a child of Aphrodite would ever be interested in learning"

"AH!" You yelp as a voice appears behind you

" 'Thena can you not sneak up on children, that's fucking creepy"

You tilt your head "Mr. D???"

"kid next time you want to study just bother Chiron, there's legal procedures to this kinds of things" he groaned

You were about to apologize but then Athena spoke up for you "Nonsense, if she wants an education is it not reasonable to get it from the best?"

She turns to you "kid, what do you want to know about?"

With great determination you say "I want to know everything I can manage to learn"

"really?" She smirked

"Yes. Whatever you can teach me, how to use an abacus, what body part do you stab someone to kill them in an instant, how to crochet, whatever you can teach"

"yeah while you two are at it can you teach her how to undo my punishment" Mr D opens another new diet coke

______________________________

"Gods- Wait crap" you collapse on the floor

4 fucking hours now, she's been training you for four hours, Mr D had finished 55 diet cokes watching and laughing at you

Out of every fight, she wins, of course she does, out of every train, sparring, archery and everything she made you try

"new rule, all you have to do is make sure this cloth touches me, whether it be a momentary graze or wrap it around me, it just needs to make contact, and I will try to push you out of bounds" she says pulling out a blue cloth and a bunch of rocks and twigs form a square

You didn't think it'd be easy, at all, she'd dodge and dodge and dodge

You lunge at her and change direction to where she's going, but she flies instead

The sun is going down, and Athena flies down and kicks you near the bounds

"AHHH! ow! Shit!" Your form looks disfigured, your arm is under your body and it doesn't look good

You cry, tears coming out as you try to not scream "I fell the wrong way, I-" you sob on the ground

"Shit, Thena what did you do?!?" Mr D stands up

"I'm sorry- I didn't, help please...." You scream in pain

Athena teleports to you and kneels, she turns to Mr D "I'll call on Apollo to heal her arm and-" she stops talking

She stops talking as she feels a silky texture on her cheeck

With wide eyes she looks at you, and your smug smile, that stupid smile

"I finally won against you" you stand up and dust yourself off

You can't beat the goddess of wisdom, but- you can trick her

"huh..." She says

Mr D spikes his diet coke on the ground "(name) go fuck yourself"

___________________________

I'm about to take a test rn, it's mathematics 😀

Anyways enjoy the chapter:3

@delias-stuff @sadslasher13 @ellaprime7 @wpdarlingpan @mountvesuvu @chinxinsomnia @nathaly36 @vanessa-boo @bat1212 @ceramic-raven

[sukunas-wife]

Sealed 2

1 3

“Year after year after year the hours pass and it never ends, I’ve been here for millennia is Ryomen even trying?” You sat down onto the pile of bones, skeletons supporting you the best they could. The Prison Realm had become your domain, you’d molded every bone and skeleton to do your work. Your elbow resting on the spine of skeleton your cheek pressing against your fist as you stared bored.

Looking down the pile of bones and skeletons holding up your throne that you had formed to match Sukuna’s you saw two Skeletons battling for your amusement. Sighing you slouched back in your throne, watching the two headed four armed skeleton using sharpened bones as spears, fighting a towering 6 armed Skelton. His arms like vices ready to grab and shove whatever into its gaping rib cage to crush it. “This needs more!” The two skeletons looked up at you, before the rumbling of the skeletal centaur could be heard, a centaur of bone, his torso with 4 arms, it held an extended spine as if it were a chain. Lower two arms ready to grab at anything, more specifically rip off the head and spine of its opponents.

“YES! THIS IS what we need!” You smacked the skeleton who stood near you on the back. His bones shaking as you leaned forward, you’d find out soon which of your creations was truly the strongest. “Let’s get this show started-“ it was quick blur of red and black before you were standing head tilted to the side as you stared irked at the man in front of you. “Do YOU KNOW WHAT YOU JUST DID.”

“PLEASE FORGIVE ME! I BEG FOR MERCY I SPENT MUCH OF MY LIFE LOOKING FOR THIS TREASURE THATS BEEN hidden away heating the tales of how the sourcerer’s of old time had wrongly imprisoned a Diety of Fertility separating her from her son. I just come to beg and ask you give my wife your blessing to have a child were old in age but she’s always prayed and begged. I’ve run out of hope until i heard you tale, i beg and hoped you’d have mercy- Sit up” was all you said. The man went from groveling to sitting back on his heels. Sighing the conflict inside of you was great. You looked around tucking your arms into the sleeves of your worn Kimono. “Bring me your wife,” you looked up through the canopy of the trees you see the sun at mid day, “you have two sunsets and then I leave.” The man quickly bowed again at your feet thanking you before running off. You kicked the prison realm box “Damnit who won!” You snatched it up, the air was familiar, you started to look around. The reason it was so familiar was because it wasn’t to far from where you had been sealed. The skeletal remains of the sourcerers made you seethe. You found the remains of the man who sealed you grabbing his skull with your free hand making it look at you, “my child my husband,” you crushed it without fail, “you took it all from me and now everyone will pay.” Th tears falling down were hot. Dropping the remains you started your first technique “Reanimate.” A wave of purple radiated from you, hitting every border of the palace. Skeletal remains shaking and coming together to stand, “Get this place back into shape.” They started moving, you made your way inside the palace the inside help had been reanimated also, your ladies in waiting now remains, standing beside you as you enter “Find fabric I need new robes.” They rushed off and you made it to your old room, the massive bed your son had fallen off many times when he would try to sleep with you and his dad. The wardrobe filled with your husband’s old robes. The room was dusty and smelt humid, shoving the window open you tried not to cry, on the window sill was a talisman Sukuna had created for Yuji. Sniffling you turned your head, finding a small blanket and stuffed Tiger doll Yuji carried around that morning. A gift for his 2nd birthday that he loved and it showed on the tigers rugged appearance.

“My Yuji..” your faint whisper sounding so loud in the silence as you ran your fingers of the stuffed doll holding it close to your chest as you made your way around the room planning your moves. Your plans had always been to follow in similar steps to Sukuna. Except that you’d be known for good to balance out the evil perspective they had of your husband. First, fix your palace. Second, create miracles in the closest town or village to make profit and move into a bigger city to improve profits. Find wherever Sukuna had been sealed away, and break him free. Find Yuji and take him back from this cruel world.

❤️🖤🖤❤️🖤🖤❤️🖤🖤❤️🖤🖤❤️🖤🖤❤️

It’s been over 100 more years and you’d grown accustomed to the changing in technology and times, passing the crowds into your shrine you smiled ruffling the heads of kids who smiled up at you, rubbing the plump bellies of pregnant women you passed and “blessing” the sick with instant health with simply laying a hand on them and smiling kindly.

Entering your shrine for the last time your Gentlemen in waiting was packing up what was left. The last thing left was the main room where your wide throne sat, you’d be leaving it being to your followers, the cushions you provided for your followers during your sessions. “Morí.” You called out and he came from the room he was in bowing and holding his hands out in front of him. “Yes Lady Y/n?”

“Morinozuka, we’re leaving tonight to Sendai City. The mark of my binding vow is burning more, but are you sure that’s where we need to go?”

“Yes Lady Y/n.” He spoke not looking up from his bow. You nodded, “then it’s final.”

❤️🖤🖤❤️🖤🖤❤️🖤🖤❤️🖤🖤❤️🖤🖤❤️

“So this is the place?” You turned to Morí and he nodded. “It’s not as lavish but this is the closest we can get… Your excellency.. I strongly recommend you continue to hide your cursed energy until I suggest otherwise.” You nodded getting out of the car “Very well, I will.”

It was morning when you had arrived, standing in front of the door to the house you looked over an elder man was walking out of his house he looked over and you smiled at him and he had a very faint twitch of his lip. Until a man with pink hair came out, follows by a woman with black hair and you felt it. The pulse of cursed energy and instinctively you grabbed Mori by his robes and pulled him towards you, “That woman, she’s no woman that- is the carrier of your child.” You head snapped instantly to him, “The father of my child, that’s the sorcerer who knew Sukuna, and he is going to mother my child?” Your face showing your exact emotions Mori placing a hand over yours, “Lady Y/n, please recollect your thoughts. I can assure you he will NOT be mothering your child, and her husband will not be fathering him either.” Letting go of his robes you nodded. Looking over your shoulder you watched the couple get into a car the elder man scowling when they started to drive away.

Turning to look at you he tucked his arms behind his back walking over, “Good Morning I’m L/n Y/n.” You greeted bowing after you moved closer, he dismissed you with a wave of your hand. “Morning, Wasuke Itadori.” He cocked a brow and looked over at your house, “It’s been up for sale for a long time. Almost 3 years before someone has moved in.” You looked back at your house, “I moved in to get closer to work. I thought it was just a blessing for everything to line up so perfectly.”

He nodded, “Well, blessings only go so far here. My son’s wife is something I’d consider to be a curse.” You nodded, “oddly enough I wouldn’t disagree. I know a snake when I see one and from a brief glance I wouldn’t trust her at all.”

He nodded, “Have a good day moving in, if you need help my son and his wife will be returning soon. I’m sure either of them would be willing to help with any problems.”

“Have a good day Mr.Itadori.” You bowed your head slightly and you both went separate ways.

“Mori,” you sighed entering your house “count these days.”

[velvet4510]

I used to love Hinny as a ship - until I realized all the reasons I loved it were blanks in the text that I filled in in my head. Within the text itself, JKR seriously ruined this ship. She gave Harry & Ginny absolutely phenomenal potential as a couple … and then went nowhere with it.

The Horcrux plotline could’ve been THE thing that brought those two together. Because Ginny was literally possessed by a Horcrux for a whole year. She of all people should understand what it’s like for Harry - a Horcrux himself - to feel so mentally violated by Voldemort. And honestly this is why I shipped them as I was reading the books; I figured that’d be a beautiful way of bonding them in the future.

But instead…when Ginny mentions that experience in the later books, Harry literally says “I forgot.”

EXCUSE ME??????

We’re supposed to believe she’s the love of his life when he FORGOT THAT SHE SPENT A WHOLE YEAR POSSESSED BY HIS GREATEST ENEMY AND HE HAD TO RESCUE HER FROM SAID ENEMY????

(Meanwhile he remembers something Draco looked at in a shop 4 years ago.)

I’m sorry but I just can’t buy that.

Then when they do get together, does it happen because Harry realizes “oh Ginny gets me”? No, it’s because Harry suddenly and abruptly thinks “oh no, she’s hot.”

And then they never talk about Voldemort. He never trusts her with the Horcrux info, the way he trusts Ron and Hermione, his best friends. He gets with her as an escape/way of forgetting what he’s been going through, which is the most shallow excuse for a relationship.

Then she proves she actually doesn’t get him at all, when she says “I knew you wouldn’t be happy unless you were fighting Voldemort.” HAPPY??? Harry is not HAPPY to be fighting Voldemort!! Ginny assumes Harry enjoys being The Chosen One, being the hero that she sees him as. If she really understood him, she would never say that.

We’re supposed to think they’d actually be perfect life partners???

Plus there’s not even a payoff between Ginny and Voldemort in any way. Imagine how satisfying it would’ve been if Ginny got to destroy one of the Horcruxes. Not that Neville didn’t deserve his big moment, but like if Ginny had been in the Room of Requirement fire scene and tossed the diadem into the flames herself, or if she’d been the first one to pick up the Sword of Gryffindor and used it to save some people before tossing it to Neville for him to take out Nagini. Forget her being the main character’s endgame love interest - Ginny herself, as her own character, deserved that closure.

And then the movies didn’t even TRY to fix this - they actually made it blatantly worse by stripping Ginny of all of her book personality, causing their relationship to make even LESS sense.

Hinny are more of an idea of a great couple than actually a great couple. We come up with all these reasons in our heads why they’d be good together, but JKR never actually puts those reasons into the text or makes them a proper part of the story to give their relationship real development. Instead, she makes it extremely superficial and, in many ways, toxic.

Ladies, let’s all agree we can do better than a guy who is a longtime family friend and yet forgets about that one time we got possessed by an evil wizard even though he remembers what his “rival” glanced at in a store 4 years ago.

[winterzsurprise]

Change My Mind [4]

Pairing: BTS x reader

SUMMARY: As a make-up artist, you were expected to glamorize your clients with brushes and products that cost a week-worth of food, not to befriend them outside of work, let alone have them save you from dates yet here you are five years later as one of their closest confidants.

Being a stylist of the world's biggest boyband is no easy feat, someone is doing flips, someone can't stay still and one's asleep but its fine, you can work around their chaos but then one day, you find out they're all your soulmates, a whole different can of chaos you don't think you can handle.

Tags: Soulmates AU, Friends to Lovers, Eventual Smut, Not Beta Read, Slow Build, Polyamory, Attempts at Humor

Words: 7.2k

nothing much to say this time but this is not beta read, my friend who was supposed to read it is unfortunately unavailable, idk if the argument makes sense in the end cause I personally run from confrontations so idk how to write good arguments so yeah.

ANYWAYS, Happy reading!!

EDIT 03/05/25: changed a few dialogues and added a few things

<<<Prev || MASTERLIST || Next>>>

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In all of your years working for Bangtan, as one of their staff and the youngest stylist, you've been included in every life events and celebrations there is. Birthdays, first wins, comebacks, everything there is even something as important as family dinners. You've never skipped or forgot a single member's birthday, period.

But as Guwon stands before you, a plane ticket to Jeju in hand with the departure scheduled tomorrow and returning just a day short before the tour, you find yourself at a crossroad. It’s Jungkook's birthday tomorrow and Jimin has planned a small party tonight at their dorms before the formal celebration at the company the next day.

While you've been trying to rectify the awkward air between you and the maknae since his confession by starting conversations, the maknae only replied to you with silence before promptly vanishing in two seconds flat.

But despite the strain in your relationship, you could never think of not attending his birthday. You'd never thought to be petty enough to return his energy. His present was already wrapped in a pretty bow under your bed for a week now for Christ's sake!

“I-I can't… It's one of their birthday’s tomorrow.”

“Oh.” His smile falls. “Can't you just give your gift today? Surely they can party for one night without you.”

It was a genuine question, logical and true but for some reason, his tone raised concerns within you. You swear to the highest heavens you could hear a bit of irritation hidden beneath dejection.

You winced. “I can't, I'm really sorry… I-I can pay you back what you've spent for the trip. I'm really sorry, I just never missed any of their birthdays. I swear I'll make it up to you next time!”

Guwon's shine dulled the further you went on and your heart twinged with guilt. In another universe where some humans gained animalistic features, he'd have dog ears pressed to his skull, staring at you with wide and glistening eyes.

You waved off the image immediately, disturbed.

“It's also my fault for not asking for your schedule. The tour is next week and then you'd be away from me for months so I kind of… panicked. I'm sorry.”

He should've known better than not to do research on your bosses, a voice at the back of your head scoffed and you waved the thought away as you put a hand over his. 

“I should've notified you as well. Tell me if those are refundable or not, I'll pay you back.”

He waves you off. “Cute but I've been raised well to know not to ask a lady to pay for my mistake, so don't worry that pretty head of yours about not being able to go.”

The date continued and thankfully, no dead air remained and conversation eased out of the both of you. Guwon sorted out his reservations early on, he'd stopped eating every once in a while to pick up his phone to either receive a call or respond to an email.

With how often he answered the chimes of his phone and how long it took for him to finally put it down, you figured he must've prepared a lot for the week and it made you feel more guilty every time he did it.

Today, he brought you both to an indoor park he rented for an hour for a picnic. It was on the outskirts of Seoul and he also cooked most of the food placed between you both, his mother however, was responsible for the side dishes.

Speaking of mothers, yours called earlier to congratulate you on whatever it was she was adamant on keeping secret but you already knew what it was and you were glad Jungkook’s mother gave birth on such a perfect day almost 21 years ago.

Guwon was planning to propose to you during the trip.

It left a bitter taste in your tongue. Sure you had expected to be married to him at some point but you barely knew the man outside of his colorful stories, and knew none of his actual behavior in his home. You haven't even visited his house yet for a vibe check so why is he rushing too fast?

Despite the guilt in your heart, relief is more palpable knowing you'd have more time to figure out if you truly want Guwon in your life.

Your phone vibrated in your pocket and you took a glance at it.

           [17:29] Jinnie: I'll pick you up at your apartment by 6.            [17:29] Jinnie: please be prepared😊

Seeing the t̶h̶r̶e̶a̶t̶e̶n̶i̶n̶g̶ friendly smile attached at the end of his message, you're suddenly reminded of the present. You hadn't told any of them of your date today, something that had drawn out longer than you thought it would. You frowned, fingers drumming on the side of your phone as you pondered on what to reply.

You had promised to help with the food yet here you are, out of town and on a picnic date inside a garden observatory.

“Who is it?” Guwon asks, seeing the frown on your face. Your mind immediately picks up the odd tone he has.

“Their oldest, Jin. We're supposed to cook together before the rest comes home.”

He furrowed his eyebrows. “I thought the birthday was tomorrow?”

“Oh, we're planning a small party before it, just his closest friends.”

Guwon nodded, eyes distant and thoughtful as he took a bite of his sandwich before continuing. “What time are you expected?”

“Their eldest said he'll pick me up at six.”

He looked at his watch and frowned deeper. “It's already 5:30. Maybe I can drive you to their dorm instead?”

You immediately shook your head. Remembering the promise you had with Jin and Jungkook. The maknae had recently begun to look at your direction again yesterday after Hoseok had talked to him, inviting Guwon would ruin the smallest progress you’ve had. 

Not to mention, you can't reveal their dorm location even if he is to be your husband. Company rules and you've signed an NDA.

“Company rules, can't reveal their location.”

“If we're going to be a couple soon, I'm going to need to know more about these guys you're hanging around. I don't trust them.” He says as he turns to the picnic basket to take another sandwich out, unable to see the twitch in your eye. 

“Well, you have to learn how to, they’re my bosses and my best friends.”

“I’m having a hard time believing that. I mean,” He scoffed. “Did you notice how they look at me whenever I’m around? That rapper—Yun–Yoonmi stared at me like I’m an insect he stepped on.”

Anger boils deep within your soul and you’re sure it's visibly contorting your face at this point but the man didn’t notice it and continued chewing on his food.

“Besides, their location is pretty well known already, no? Just a couple searches away, why be so secretive about it?”

You refrain yourself from frowning and it takes all of the energy within you to not react as wildly as you would’ve. It was amazing how the illusion of something good could shatter with only a few words and you set down the sandwich in your hand, your appetite fizzling away.

There's something terribly humbling upon realization that the man you're talking to is indeed, a man.

Noticing the shift in the air, he set down his cup of coffee with a slight raise to his brows.

“Why are you looking at me like that? It's true though, I just think it's pointless to try to hide it when some people already know, so what's the use of trying to hide their dorm?”

Where's Jimin and Taehyung at times like this?

You dreaded the conversation you're about to bring up to your mother once she calls, and could hear her scolding you for having such high standards. But Guwon being indifferent to the possibility of being stalked, and your boys’ privacy being breached immediately raise red glaring flags over his head. 

A lawyer himself who shrugged at the threat of crimes, the joke just writes itself.

“Don't look at me like that, I'm just… trying to understand why you didn't want me to interact with them after our second date. It makes a man overthink, you know?”

Whatever thread you were holding onto, a sliver of hope that you might've misheard or misunderstood him, decayed within you and you picked up your phone to stuff into your bag.

You had hoped, wished, that after your deep talk on the night Seokjin had scolded your ass to the nines he'd understand your dynamic better with the boys or at least try. You could already hear Yoongi's drawl out ‘I told you so’ as you packed up, even imagine him bringing up Namjoon’s statistical analysis and how I should've listened to it.

“If you're implying what I think you are implying then I don't think we should meet each other anymore.”

Tossing the food back into the basket carelessly, you slung your bag over your shoulder and stand, only for his hand to shoot out to grab your wrist in an iron grip.

“Wait, I-I'm sorry! I just got… jealous, that's all.”

Even with the apologetic look displayed clearly on his face and the fear swimming with them, nothing could bring back to life the trust you had on the man and you pushed his hand away.

“I can't stay with someone who can't understand why those boys are important to me, sorry Guwon but we're over. Don't ever contact me again.”

“You can't possibly be breaking up with me because I said what I felt? Over them? Really?!”

You don't even recognize the man sitting opposite you.

He knew, he saw how close you are with them and even sat through the stories you told him during your dates. Guwon knew you cherished every single boy in the group yet he disregarded it all because of jealousy? If that isn't a warning, then you might be blind.

“It's like I never even knew you at all.”

He scoffed. “Same with you. Can't believe I actually believed your words telling me you were friends but I saw how those boys treated you! No male friends should be that comfortable touching and hugging you like that without a reason!”

Sure your relationship with your bosses is unusual but it was built from hardship and loneliness from being taken away from home and surrendering their time for a glimpse of fame in a field where they're at a huge disadvantage. It was special in ways not many could fathom because in their head, what reason would there be for a man to befriend a girl other than having the intention to fuck them?

It was the mindset of the old and “wise” and it had infuriated you to the nines.

For him to reveal himself as one of those old cogs when he expressed himself as a gentleman and be convinced by his act of kindness, even the word disappointing could express how greatly upset you are.

“Bet you've slept with all of them at least once, hell, I don't even know why your mother bothered when you're already busy whoring yourself for seven men.”

Anger flooded your veins, it was hot and rampaging under your skin. Before your mind could even register your actions, your hand had already moved, making contact with his cheek in one swift motion. The slap echoed like a clap of thunder in the silence of the observatory.

Even after seeing the angry red mark beginning to mar his skin, your anger remained.

“Goodbye Guwon, I hope we never see each other again.”

Walking away was easier said than done.

You got picked up by Guwon earlier and since you've run far enough from the indoor garden, away from your supposed ticket back home, you're now waiting for an uber at a small library sequestered between towering and loudly designed buildings. You had half a mind to ask your friends that lived nearby for a ride but decided against it.

They might be busy with their own family. 

Unlike you.

As you sit there waiting for your ride to come, your mind takes you to your mother and her genuine glee at the thought of you getting married. Ever since your second date, she had been sending you photographs of weddings for inspirations, links to event places and tailors, and flower shops where you could have your bouquet arranged. She was beyond ecstatic, if she heard what had happened, she would be devastated. 

A loud, exasperated sigh left your lips, the volume catching the attention of the bookkeeper who was quick to shush you.

As you waited longer with only the deafening silence of the library to accompany you, doubt began to form at the back of your head. 

Was breaking up with Guwon really the right choice? 

An angry, louder voice screamed at you for doubling down on your decision. You knew your boys longer than you knew him, if the trip had gone through, Guwon would've proposed to you despite the short time you've known each other. Something you didn't want. Not to mention, he would've gone through the idea while contemplating on your loyalty.

So yes, it was the right decision!

But you were to be married.

Your mother was so happy to have finally matched you with a guy you attended three dates with. The thought made your heart clench, she was excited to see you on the altar and has most likely spread it around your town with pride. She was about to have three married children.

Gods, you don't want to imagine the conversation later on, she'd be distraught.

Your phone buzzed and you dreaded looking at the screen to see your mother's name. Luckily, it was Jin instead.

           [18:01] Jinnie: where are you?            [18:01] Jinnie: knocked on your door but the neighbor said you were out.            [18:02] Jinnie: you're late😒            [18:02] Jinnie: I'm going to have them deduct your pay this month for making me wait            [18:03] You: I'm sorry your highness for disappointing you, please forgive this servant of yours🤧            [18:03] You: was on a date            [18:03] You: not that it matters anymore, I broke up with Guwon            [18:04] You: does it even count as a break up? I mean, we weren't official, he didn't ask me to be his girlfriend yet.

You paused, face souring as you realized what you've just typed. 

Guwon hadn't asked for your hand officially even after three dates, he had the chance on your second date during the stroll but he didn't. Despite this, he went and asked your parents for their blessings when he hadn't even asked you first.

           [18:04] You: wow I just remembered that            [18:04] You: then he had the audacity to propose to me!

There's a pause in between his usually instant replies and you had an inkling he's already spreading the gossip around the group somehow.

           [18:08] Jinnie: wow there's a LOT to unpack there            [18:08] Jinnie: but worry not            [18:08] Jinnie: I'll have Jimin get us the strongest drink there is for later            [18:09] Jinnie: we'll drink that sorrow away and you're going to tell me what the hell you meant by proposing while not being official             [18:10] You: I don't think I should tell you that…            [18:10] You: considering… ya know            [18:11] You: also don't you guys have an early schedule tomorrow?🤨            [18:12] Jinnie: bold of u to assume I don't want hear how massive of a failure he is            [18:12] Jinnie: nothing better than hearing your enemy’s downfall😌            [18:13] Jinnie: also what do you mean ‘you guys’???             [18:13] Jinnie: you're literally our make-up artist!

You huffed out a laugh at the message but before you could type up a reply, the notification from your uber app popped out to inform you about your driver now waiting outside the library and you walked out.

           [18:23] You: and just because I'm your make-up artist, doesn't mean I should let you all get away with this            [18:23] You: and I won't even drink much :pp            [18:24] Jinnie: if I ever see you stumbling around the house, you owe me 100000            [18:25] You: WOW            [18:25] You: AREN'T YOU RICH ALREADY????            [18:25] Jinnie: money is money😌            [18:26] Jinnie: just get ur ass over here already before I add more zeros to the bet

_______

The smell of Jin’s cooking, both spicy and something savory, welcomed you first before the sound of sizzles did. At the sound of the door closing, Jin appears round the corner with an apron hung from his neck and a tong stained with red bean paste in the other.

Despite the disappointed look he's going for, reminiscent of a mother who caught her daughter coming home past curfew, the relief you feel upon seeing his handsome face after earlier was palpable and the knots in your stomach loosened.

“I should have your pay deducted for showing up late.”

You winced. “Sorry boss, can I appeal for a heartbreak discount on that?”

“Only if you give me a hug and cry on my shoulder.” 

He opened his arms wide, plush lips widening into a smile when you approached to wrap your arms around his torso. The fabric of his sweatshirt was soft and the scent of new laundry overtook his usual scent of freshly baked cakes and gentle vanilla perfume, it almost made you boneless in his hold. Moreso when he started stroking your head while the other ran up and down your back with his palm, fingers still wrapped around the tongs.

He didn't pull away despite the awkward position with him bending down and practically melting against your smaller form. In your years of being friends, you could never recall Seokjin being the first to pull away from a hug and once more, you're grateful for that.

“You wanna talk about it?”

“I’ll do it while cooking, we might burn whatever you're cooking if I told you all about it here.”

He shook his head, his rubbing motions on your back turning into gentle pats. “We can just order it online if it does, I even bet that they'll still eat it even if it was. Hoba was relentless today.”

His nails raked through your scalp and you resisted the urge to shiver. 

“He was being an ass towards you guys. Then when I defended you all, he accused me of sleeping around.”

His first instinct was to curse the man down to his ancestors who bred with each other until he was born, but stopped himself when he realized what he's about to say and cleared his throat.

His arms coiled tighter around you, you leaned into him further.

“Normally I would say ‘I told you so’ but I know Yoongi has it covered later. So I'll just say—"

"Don't you dare. Jin don’t you dare finish that sentence."

"I did prophesize this outcome, did I not?" he said in the most antiquated Korean ever.

He let out a cry when your hand slapped his arm but it quickly dissolved into a fit of squeaky laughter and he pushed your head back under his chin before you could even continue hitting him. Hand continuing their petting as you let out an annoyed groan.

“My mom was so excited! God. I hate that bastard for disappointing me and her. She was sending me links to wedding planners and dressmakers because apparently he was supposed to take me to Jeju tomorrow and propose.”

He stills in your arms, the hand in your hair stopping its motion as his breath hitched in his chest. It took him a moment before he recollected himself and continued to pat your head, pressing a kiss on top of your crown.

“I'm sure auntie will understand, I know that she would've wanted you to find a good man like she did.”

A voice at the back of your head told you he was referring to himself but you threw the thought away as soon as it went.

“Personally, I would've taken the ticket and ditch him.” He laughed and you hit his arm with a barely concealed grin. “All I'm saying is that free things should be used and if it's gifted then better! You get to decide how to use it so refund it!”

“I don't think it's that easy.”

“Just say Kim Seokjin of BTS asked for a refund and they'll immediately accept it. You know how powerful our name is now.”

Pulling away, you playfully rolled your eyes at him, earning you one last laugh as you walked to the kitchen where the sizzles of the food being fried on the pan had long been muted. Jin followed you with an onslaught of words spilling from his lips, justifying and detailing how he would've done in your place as you placed your bag down on the island counter before reaching for the spare apron.

Hearing his rants filling the silence made it easier to relax, it made forgetting how upset you were at Guwon a walk in the park.

It was familiar and his voice, despite his fiery indignation, was oddly comforting.

Soon enough, your conversation halts and you both position yourself over the counter, following his orders mindlessly; which is mostly dicing the vegetables and the slabs of meat he marinated last night in soy sauce and spices. 

You found the repetitive motions of chopping soothing and silently thanked the man now hovering over the saucepan, gently stirring the seaweed soup. 

As if sensing your eyes boring holes on the back of his head, his ears reddened and he looked over his shoulder to meet your gaze.

“W-what is it? Wh-why are you looking at me like that?”

“Just admiring how huge your shoulders are and… just how reliable it looks.” 

You recalled how dearly he cared for his group despite the exhaustion from practicing singing and dancing the whole day. Despite being the youngest in his family, Jin took on the mantle of the oldest brother in the group easily and selflessly provided for his members alongside Yoongi and Namjoon. 

If it were anybody, you were sure the boys would've been sick or had long given up, especially when the company was about to file bankruptcy in their earlier years.

From the bone shattering dances, exhausting practices and routines stretching from dawn till dusk, you were thankful Seokjin was there to catch the others when they fall.

It was a hard task nobody would've assumed since selfishness is a built-in trait of a human yet Seokjin proved you wrong when he stayed up every night despite the muscle cramps and exhaustion weighing his bones to cook for his members, taking the role of the eldest like it was a second nature despite being the youngest in his family.

He barked out a half-hearted laugh as his red ears brightened from the compliment. “I already know that of course!”

“Thank you for everything, Jin.”

His face crumpled when he laughed bashfully, the bright hue in his ears crawling to dusk his cheeks as well. It didn't take long before he recovered and like clockwork, in reaction to being flustered by compliments, he got defensive and raised the saucer threateningly at you.

“Ya! If you're planning to compliment me, at least be original! I'm done hearing about how wide my shoulders are from ARMY and how reliant I am from the others! We've been together for years, do better and be original with your compliments!”

It was a joke, obviously.

But staring at the older man childishly brandishing his cooking utensil like a bludgeoning weapon, you couldn't help but ponder about what truly pulled you into him only to realize that you've never truly dove deeper than surface level details. 

It was disappointing to find out how shallow you've been when expressing your appreciation for the man.

Like he said, you've always pointed out how reliable he is but never have you pointed out the small things such as the warm food he claimed have been extras and the hot soups sectioned off for you on cold days. He was the youngest in his family yet he took the mantle of the oldest as if it was meant to be, he had taught the maknaes and had stirred them away from diving off of the deepest end of their minds despite being susceptible to them as well.

He was the first to approach you on the first day despite being the member who mostly kept to himself, asking you if you wanted to celebrate their Rookie of the Year win with them instead of the rowdy staff behind you. 

The first one to build a bridge leading to this deep companionship you had with the rest of the members, have you really never thanked him for that?

“You're so caring and humble despite your background and where you are right now. If it was anybody else, they would've left the boys to fend for themselves once they were able to,  yet you didn't stop cooking for them, for us. I don't think I have ever met a man so down to earth and as loving as you are,” You paused. “Well, except Jimin but if you want something more original I'd say I love your hands even when you think they're weird because they—”

You didn't even realize Jin crossed the distance between you both until his hands clasped around your lips, silencing you completely.

Unlike earlier with only his ears blushing, his cheeks now glowed red, the flushed skin spreading down to his neck, continuing past the collar of his dark blue pajamas. When your eyes meet, you find his glistening with unshed tears no doubt touched by your hastily put together declaration of your appreciation for him. 

When it was clear you wouldn't continue your rant, his arms fell to your shoulders and pulled you into a tight embrace. 

His violent heartbeats thudding against his chest was the first thing you've heard before you registered the stuttered exhales and his gentle saccharine scent filling your senses, clouding your brain completely. For a moment, it was just you and him in the kitchen, hugging a little longer than friends should be.

But then again, since when have you guys ever drawn the line on how platonic touches should last?

“God… You gotta stop doing that.”

“I'm just following what you told me like a good junior and I think I did exceedingly well on it. Does that guarantee a deduction on my pay deduction?”

There's an odd, invisible weight that lifted off of you, something you didn't even realize you were carrying. But there's also a tinge of guilt pinching the edges of your heart.

Jin was the first to approach you, and the first to confess four years ago. He was all shy looks and sweet smiles, his sweet words accompanied by a bouquet of flowers that must've cost him more than he could've gotten from being an idol of a new group. 

When Jin loves, he gives his all and doesn't think twice to give half of himself as well. In a way, he and Yoongi were alike, just with different approaches.

He was open and unapologetic while Yoongi was subtle and often silent.

His laugh twinkled in your ears but it dwindled later on, as if he remembered something towards the end of his mirth. “You're driving me crazy, how am I supposed to move on when you're this lovely?”

Hearing him confirm your suspicion about his crush—is it even called that at this point?—relieved you from an unknown anxiety most likely sparked by Jungkook's words a few nights ago. Why are you even relieved hearing him still liking you when all you've done is hurt him?

“You're such an idiot, you know that?”

“Love makes you do the stupidest thing but I don't think I've ever regretted ever falling for you.”

He pulls away, a gentler, softer smile now tugging his lips up.

“God, you made me sappy! My god, my soup!” 

Even without the warmth of his embrace, you could feel it radiate in the small space of the kitchen. You continued your work as Jin fuzzed about the seaweed soup behind you, bathing in the domesticity of it all.

Your phone vibrates loudly in your bag on the island counter. Wiping your hand on your apron, you opened it to see Jimin’s messages.

           [18:56] Mimi: seokjin hyung told me to buy the strongest alcohol             [18:57] Mimi: any idea why he’s being weird?            [18:57] You: I’ll tell jin that you called him weird            [18:57] You: but yes            [18:57] You: I’ll tell you all later why            [18:58] Mimi: 🤨            [18:58] Mimi: not if I get you drunk in the first ten minutes            [18:58] You: I’d like to see you try, pretty boy

Your phone vibrated again. Namjoon had texted you, seeing the preview you rolled your eyes.

           [18:59] Joonie: Seokjin hyung didn’t say but I already figured it out            [18:59] Joonie: You'd hear enough from Yoongi hyung later but            [18:58] Joonie: I told you so            [18:58] You: I hope you trip and fall on shit🥰            [18:59] Joonie: Love you too, noona😁            [18:59] You: blocked🚫

“I'm not seeing enough chopping, young lady. Get back to your station!” Jin jokingly scolds. With a laugh, you return to your spot.

By the time some of the boys arrived—except Jimin, Jungkook and Taehyung, no doubt pre-gaming somewhere—it was already ten and some of the dishes were plated, ready to be eaten in the dining room. If it wasn't for both your and Jin's advanced thinking to ready the bowl of rice and their plates beforehand, they would have starved to death as Yoongi dramatically puts it before blaming Hoseok for draining them out the whole day.

The man in question just laughed in response before shrugging and rebuking their ‘accusations’, saying it wasn't even that hard. To this, Yoongi grumbled under his breath and Namjoon rolled his eyes.

A few minutes later, the maknaes entered, cheeks all flushed except for Jimin who was holding up a bag full of canned alcohol as if it was game from an all-day hunt.

You thanked Jimin silently for drinking the birthday boy tipsy enough to make the dinner energetic instead of the awkwardness you thought it'd be due to what happened a few days ago. There's fleeting eyes you've caught in between jokes he made, either pouring with adoration or longing, you tried to not to pay it much mind.

But of course, the alcohol pouring could only go for so long before you're all lounging in the living room to talk about anything that comes to mind. It was half an hour short from the clock tickling to twelve, signifying Jungkook's actual birthday.

The conversation started off tame with Taehyung questioning the animals who sleep standing to something more elaborate with Yoongi asking everyone's opinion about some decrypt conspiracy theory surrounding the rich of the west. It was all fun and games when Taehyung, lost in his own mind running with the most random thought, sluggishly pointed at you and asked:

“Wh-why aren't you checking your phone? G-Guwon hyung haven't been texting you yet?”

Many heads turned to you who was practically boneless in between a tipsy Hoseok and a still sober Yoongi. You didn't even need to look to know the look of concern Jin was throwing your way.

But everything was hazy, your head throbbing from the alcohol. The words slipped past your lips before you could think about it.

“We parted ways… He accused me of sleeping around when I said I didn't want to go on a trip with him tomorrow ‘cause I didn't want to skip Jungkookie's birthday.”

Hoseok patted your shoulder and Yoongi nodded, face indifferent as usual. Despite the reaction of the boys on both sides, not everyone in the circle held the same opinion it seems.

“You didn't have to decline it, noona. You-you’ve been with us for years, missing one wouldn't hurt me much.”

Jungkook's voice was softer as if he had sobered up from the revelation and you waved him away.

“What are you saying? I couldn't leave when we weren't alright.” You glimpsed at Jin before continuing. “Besides, he was planning to propose and I'm glad he couldn't anymore.”

In your drunken mind, the information didn't carry much weight but the pin drop silence following your words did, you guessed that it must've been. However, it didn't last long when Taehyung jumped up to his feet and punched the air as if Korea just scored the final score in FIFA.

The boys look at him with wide eyes, shocked by his reaction. Jimin recovers and tries to tug him down but a drunk Taehyung is determined, with a will stronger than a monk's resilience and patience, no one could stop him from doing what he wanted.

And that was bumping his glass on your forehead, a little harder than it should've been if he was sober and you reel back, a hand over your forehead.

“Noona! you're free again! Do you know what that means?!”

“Ok that's enough for you tonight. Let's get you to bed.” Jimin says, chuckling awkwardly as he stands behind his best friend, wrapping his arms around his waist before dragging him away.

“Why? Can't I just congratulate noona from recognizing something was off instead of ignoring it like most do? Noona,” He turned to you, bottom lip jutted out. “It's not bad that I'm celebrating right?”

Seokjin’s laugh was nervous when he rose to usher the man away as well. “Alright, let's all calm down so we don't accidentally say something while drunk.”

“Fuck yeah! I-I don’t even know why I even believed his lies, he’s a lawyer for fucks sake!”

“Not that it ever stopped you before. I still don't understand why you couldn't have married one of us instead.” Jungkook cuts in, suddenly irritated.

Somehow, the tension in the room grew tenfold and everyone sits up, alert and ready to interfere if their youngest decides to let the alcohol take control of him. Your brain clears once it registered the annoyance in his voice, heart dropping to the soles of your feet.

“Jungkook—”

“I just think it's a bullshit excuse and you know it. You told that to Jin-hyung four years ago and have repeated it ever since. We’re all adults now, we can handle a little rejection and who’s to say we can’t date when we’re the only idol running the company. You say it's because you don’t want to choose but aren’t you just instilling false hope in us?” 

He stood as he grew more agitated but Jin pushed him down, eyes stern as he stared down at their youngest. Seeing the conflict brew between them, the growing guilt built by years of spending time with them reawakened.

It tied your stomach in a knot and felt like a building had dropped onto your heart.

As if sensing your emotions, Yoongi’s hand found your shoulder to give it a squeeze.

“You’re not thinking straight so stop it,” Jin excuses as he turns to you with an apologetic smile. “He’s just drunk, he doesn’t—”

“I know what I’m saying and I think you’re being too biased here hyung!”

“Jungkook…” Hoseok calls from next to you, voice low, a warning.

“You too! Why aren’t you pointing out how she’s just playing with us? Why are you only calling me out?”

“Because you’re being a stupid drunk right now, Jungkook. Stand down.” Yoongi ordered, voice firm and warning. His arms are crossed as he stared their youngest down but the maknae wasn’t intimidated by it, if anything, the fire in the older man’s eyes only fueled the anger boiling within him.

In years you’ve watched over them, never once has Yoongi scolded their youngest past playful reprimands in Run BTS contents, leaving the lecturing to their oldest and leader. For him to call him out and seeing them grow agitated by each other’s presence, dread loomed over you with your nightmares threatening to come true. 

This isn’t how tonight’s party was supposed to go.

It was supposed to be all about Jungkook, to praise and celebrate his life yet everyone is scolding him.

“Isn’t there anyone who’d agree with me at how absurd all of this is?!” His head snapped at Namjoon who’s watching with a careful eye. “Hyung, surely you can also see it!”

Throughout the exchange, Namjoon had sat back and watched the interaction from the sidelines instead of interfering on the first hint of a fight breaking out. Even when the situation becomes a little aggressive, he stays silent but you don’t doubt that he’d be the first to stand if the disagreement becomes volatile and inching towards physical.

That's what he always has done, observed and let the high rise of emotions eventually tides down to a calm on their own. He's a leader, he's supposed to be fair and to do so, he must first understand both sides before taking action. He also trusts his own team to temper their own ire after years of being together.

But now that he's forced to join the argument, he sighed and stood. Seokjin stepped away as Namjoon approached their youngest with both hands placed on his shoulders to sit him back down. 

Obediently, Jungkook follows.

“While I do see where you’re coming from, I think it's a bit unfair that you’re blaming her for being scared.” Jungkook opens his mouth but a firm shake of Namjoon’s head shuts him up. “Don’t start again. There’s a power imbalance here kid. If her choosing someone could cause a problem, we’d get off scot free but not her. In the eyes of the company, she’s disposable—”

“But she’s not.”

“She is. In their eyes at least. By having her around causing problems for us, she’s nothing but a thorn in their side that they should remove. If she had dated one of us and eventually broke up, it would cause an awkwardness and riff between guys especially if it ended on a bad note and BigHit won't stand for it. You know how important this job is for her, right?”

They stared at each other for a long while, both unrelenting in silence. You all waited with bated breath, Namjoon was the only one who could diffuse the situation and if he fails, then who else could possibly calm the maknae down?

Turning to the clock, you bit your lip at the time.

It was nearing Jungkook's actual birthday, three minutes short before both hands ticked to twelve.

Which meant it would have to start during the denouement of an argument. The thought planting discomfort in your stomach. Such a happy celebration shouldn't be welcomed like this.

In the midst of raised voices and pointing fingers, Taehyung has completely sobered up from where he sat between Jimin’s thighs, staring beady eyed at the situation in his friend’s arms. Sensing your gaze, he turned to you with a sheepish, apologetic smile when Jungkook's heavy sigh broke through the silence.

His head fell to his chest as Namjoon removed his hands from his shoulders yet his eyes remained on their youngest’s hunched form.

“You get what we're trying to say now, do you?”

“Y-yeah…”

“Anything you want to say, gguk?” Namjoon was talking to him like he was a kindergarten teacher and you both were kids who fought on the sandbox for the shovel, warm and understanding but the disappointment in his tone is clear as day.

Jungkook doesn't reply but he shoots up to his feet, surprising Hoseok next to you, with eyes still trained on the floor.

When he did look up to meet your gaze, it was brief and cut off by a deep bow. You reached your hands out, trying to stop him from doing so but Yoongi took one of your hands and pinned them down between his and your thighs.

Jungkook never had to bow for you and it felt wrong seeing him bent down to apologize.

“I-I’m sorry noona, I-–” He trails off.

In his speechlessness in a room full of people who—while understanding where he comes from—stood behind you, he clams up and then in a flash, he’s gone, bolting from the living room and skipping up the stairs. The sound of his heavy footfalls echoing like the clock ticking down to his birthday.

The argument has been dissolved, yet it left a bitter taste on your tongue, it made you feel queasy having everyone back you up without reprimanding you as well. It was true, what Jungkook said. 

Weren't you practically leading them on by not choosing anyone? No matter how unintentional it must be, if he thinks that way then maybe everyone else in the group does, just silently.

You turned to the clock again. A minute closer to the next day.

Frustration made you want to pull your hair out but the long, lithe fingers that have entangled with yours in the middle of it all, forbade you from doing so. As if he could hear the internal debate between logic and emotions, Yoongi gave you a comforting squeeze.

But it didn't feel right, you shouldn't be sitting on your ass while Jungkook blamed himself for expressing his own opinion, sure it was a bit aggressive but you understood his frustration.

“Jungkook!” You called out, rising to your feet to follow him when Yoongi tightened his hold on your wrist and shook his head.

“He needs time to process, leave him be.”

Yet despite this, you shrugged his hold off and followed the youngest’s heavy footfalls upstairs and presumably into his room. You caught onto him in the hallway, with the door to his room opened and half of his body already inside.

“Jungkook, let us talk.”

“I-I don't want to see you right now, noona please.”

The desperation to correct the wrongs gives you a short burst of energy and you catch his wrist.

“Jungkook please, I—”

You heard the joyful chime of the clock downstairs before you heard the sweet jingles of bells.

Then you felt it.

Electric jolts shoot up from your connected hands, waking every cell and your mind awake and you almost keel over from the wave of relieving warmth washing over your body. There’s now a low hum accompanying the bells chiming in the background, the soft harmony between them sending shivers down your spine. 

You've thought of first meetings like those scenes in Hollywood movies where a kaleidoscope of colors explodes behind your eyelids, like fireworks celebrating the precious moment where the protagonists finally meet and fireworks shoot up to the sky. They talked of a brief moment of reprieve from reality, the world slowing down and feeling the most calmed you've ever been with your soulmate in hand.

Like your soul finally recognizing its pair and suddenly, everyone became a blur in the background.

Yet when you stared back at Jungkook's mirrored astonishment, your stomach bottomed out.

Because no way in hell, after all this time, you're soulmates.

TAGLIST: @wildestdreamsblog @canarystwin @prettywheenicry @jmnscutie @sassy-snassy @misuguru @11thenightwemet11 @yoongibaybee @rinkud

[stevesgother]

I Don't Want You Like A Bestfriend - S.H

Pairing - Bestfriend!Steve Harrington x Fem!Reader

WC - 2.3k

Warnings - mentions of anxiety, reader not liking large gatherings, swearing, alcohol (reader works at a bar). As always, let me know if I missed anything!

AN - Part 2 of the Dress mini series! This could technically be a standalone fic, but for the full context I would recommend reading part 1 :) 

Dress Series - Pt 1, Pt 2

December 1987

2 bowls of popcorn and 4 movies later, you’re laying on opposite ends of your twin bed with your best friend; gossiping lazily with droopy eyelids.

“I cannot go to their wedding without a date, Rob.” looking at her exasperated, “That’s like, totally embarrassing! Steve’s gonna have this Madonna-ey, bombshell blonde and with giant boobs and I'm gonna bring who? My cousin? Not happening.” You say with finality.

“Well forgive me,” Robin deadpans. “I only know like,” She gestures dramatically, trying to count in her head, “7 boys!”

May 1985

Immediately upon opening your eyes, you’re met with the blinding pain of your too big brain bouncing around inside your skull and a foreboding sense of dread upon recalling the way you behaved the night before.

You could only remember bits and pieces of the wretched night, but you were humiliated nonetheless. Had you said something you shouldn’t have? Your stomach churns at the thought and briefly you fear you might yak again.

A few weeks later, you were walking the stage, diploma in hand. Steve had broken up with Nancy Wheeler the week following prom. Feigning some bullshit about him leaving for college; not wanting to do long distance. Those cliche, overused excuses that everyone knows loosely translate to “I don’t love you anymore.”

Steve didn’t even get into tech, unbeknownst to Nancy. He was dodgy when you asked him about their breakup. “I just felt like we didn’t make sense anymore, you know? But it-” he sighed, “it’s just, it’s not like I could say that to her.” 

You didn’t want to push the subject further, despite your bewilderment. Part of you felt desperately guilty at the idea that you may have been the catalyst for what happened to their relationship. You didn’t dare ask, though. Maybe you didn’t want to know, or maybe you just didn’t want to make it about yourself. 

December 1987

The Wandering Dog was especially busy tonight. Folks trying to escape their in-laws for a few hours during the holiday season, college kids home for break trying to get wasted; and all of it was your problem. The pay was nice, you made good tips bartending. Right as you watch someone knock over an entire tray of drinks, a familiar head of hair makes its way to sit in front of you at the bar. Distracting, but not enough to suppress the groan that leaves your throat when it dawns on you that those drinks are your mess to clean up later.

“Steve-o,” you force a smile at him, “what can I do for ya on this..lovely evening?”

“Can’t a guy visit his favorite lady without needing a reason?” He lilts.

You try not to let on how flustered you feel at his usage of ‘favorite lady’. 

“You hate this bar, you’re also technically banned-” he cuts you off with a wave of his hand “Still? Seriously? It was one time-” Your turn to interrupt, “No actually, year prior? That was your first warning.” You’re met with a roll of the eyes, forgetting how utterly sassy he’s become in the last few years. You can’t decide whether you love or hate the development.

“I actually uh,” he runs a hand through his hair- a nervous habit, “I wanted to ask you something,”. You look at him quizzically, unable to pinpoint what's caused such a sudden shift in his demeanor.

“Okay…” you draw out the last syllable, more confused than unkind. “Spill it Hairspray, you’re kind of freaking me out.” you give an awkward chuckle. Your friendship is hardly what you’d consider serious. Sure, you’ve had your share of late night, existential conversations; but you can count on one hand the amount of times you’ve made the other actually nervous.

He clears his throat, “sorry yeah, sorry. I was wondering uh, ifyouwouldbemydatetojoyceandhopperswedding.”

The rest of his sentence comes out as one jumbled word. You do a double take when you finally process what he’s asking, and you choke a little on the Coke you were sipping. “What?-”

“-As friends!” he blurts loudly as his hands shoot out in front of him in a defensive gesture, “obviously, as friends. That’s- what I meant.” his words lose confidence every time he opens his mouth.

You stare for a little too long, mouth hanging open like a trout. “You don’t..already have a date?” You hope he doesn’t take offense to the inquiry. Steve Harrington can most certainly find a plus one to a simple wedding.

“Yeah I- something like that,” his mouth opens like he’s going to explain further before deciding against it; settling on a lopsided smile instead. He’s terrified he’s blown his cover. If he had given any effort at all to the endeavor, surely he would’ve been able to find a date. Fancy car, rich parents, million dollar smile and his infallible charm. The problem was that he didn’t want to go with another Heidi. Another Jessica. Another Stacy.

He wanted to go with you.

Even if it meant just as friends. You two were just friends.

-

Joyce and Hopper’s wedding was at Pokagon State Park, and the drive up was less than stellar. 3 hours stuffed inside a cramped BMW with Robin, Eddie, and Vickie. You were fortunate enough to be riding shotgun next to Steve for the trip, Eddie muttering something about ‘date privilege’.

When you arrived at the cabin you’d be sharing with your 4 friends, you were a little mortified. There was a room for Vickie and Robin, and Eddie claimed the pullout couch almost immediately. This leaves one more room. With one bed. For you and Steve Harrington. It’s possible Joyce may have misinterpreted the reality of your situation when booking the rooming accommodations.

If it bothered Steve, he didn’t show it. You guys had had sleepovers before, but almost never in the same bed. His house had a plethora of guest bedrooms, and your father would be found dead before he let a boy sleep in your room, even at the ripe age of 20.

We’re adults, you think. We can be mature about this.

There isn’t much time to dwell on it before you’re being stuffed by Robin into a too tight, wine red bridesmaid dress.

“I feel sick,” you say, groaning. “Do not barf on me,” she warns with a stern look, though you can tell she’s not really annoyed. “I really like these shoes.” Despite the itchy fabric of the dress and the obnoxiously loud color, you do look breathtakingly beautiful. Red has always been your color. 

“Hey dingus! Stop gawking and zip me would you?” Robin lightly kicks you with her bare foot, taking you out of your own head. When you exit the bathroom, you’re immediately met with the 2 boys. Even Eddie, who you don’t believe you’ve ever seen not in ripped jeans, cleans up nice.

Steve looks…strapping. Not handsome in the boyish way you’re used to. He’s all slicked hair, cufflinks and well-pressed wool. He meets your gaze and you swear his pupils dilate just slightly. An arm is offered to walk you to his car. He smells like cinnamon and cedar, woodsy and spice. He opens the passenger door for you and God, he’s a gentleman.

It’s going to be a long night.

- 

The venue was terribly charming. Floor to ceiling windows highlight the snow falling outside in big, fat flakes over the water. The room was lit entirely by yellow string lights, casting a permanent warm hue over the lodge.

On a table clad in lace, there were 5 notecards scribbled on in cursive ink. The one that adorned your name was directly adjacent to one that read Steve Harrington. They were paired with party favors wrapped neatly with a white silk bow.

Steve wanted to pull out your chair for you. He wanted to sit beside you with his hand in yours. Hell, he would’ve bought you a corsage if he thought it appropriate. A death by a thousand cuts; he was again reminded of the fact that you were not his, and he was not yours.

You were unable to identify the source of the nagging anxiety you felt. You were never partial to big gatherings like this, but the unease you were experiencing now was different. All you could do was relax, and try to enjoy the reception. Try not to pay mind to the stark, masculine presence sitting beside you.

The newlyweds’ first dance was to the beloved ‘Never Tear Us Apart’ By INXS. You think about how remarkably fitting a song it was for them and everything they had endured together. The restlessness you had previously felt started to steadily fade after that; laughing and chatting with your friends. It started to feel..normal, for a while.

Just then, like some sick esoteric joke, you hear the unmistakable beginning notes of ‘I’ll Be Over You’ by Toto. When you turn to your left, Steve has a poorly concealed, shit-eating grin on his face.

In the most sober tone he can muster through his unseriousness, he asks, “Can I have this dance?” while extending his hand to you. He prays you don’t notice it trembling slightly. It’s the undeniable corniness of his request that manages to strangle a laugh out of you.

 “I thought you’d never ask.”

With one hand delicately placed on your hip, he threads the other one with your own fingers as he starts to sway. You clumsily try to match his rhythm; so nervous that you’re becoming uncoordinated. His chest is nearly touching yours, and your noses are a hairsbreadth apart. It feels profoundly intimate.

'as soon as forever is through, I'll be over you.'

He leans his head down so his lips just brush your ear as he whispers, “You okay?”

You scoff, unconvincingly. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” You know he can see right through you. It’s fruitless to try and deceive him.

“You just seem,” he gives your waist a small squeeze, “a little tense.” You swallow hard.

“Just say the word and I'll take you home.” ‘Home’ meaning back to the cabin. Not the comforting safety of your own bed back in Hawkins. You appreciate his earnestly either way.

“I know, Steve.” you lilt, trying to lighten the intensity of the moment with a teasing tone. You rest your head against his shoulder, if only so you don’t have to keep holding his all-consuming gaze.

-

Despite the thermostat being set at a comfortable 75 degrees, you were still shivering slightly. You always ran cold. You stood in front of a dusty vanity mirror trying to extend your arms behind your back far enough to unzip this godforsaken dress.

You felt him more than you saw him. Steve’s presence displaces the air in the room as one does to water when they sink down into a steaming bath: noticeably, and comfortably. You pay him no mind as you continue to struggle with the zipper. Mulling around the same room; busy with your separate tasks, this was familiar to you. Not often did you have to acknowledge the other for them to know you were grateful for their company.

“Need a hand with that?” he asks, slightly amused as he saunters over to you.

You hesitate for a moment before looking over your shoulder and offering him a shy smile, “Yeah, if you wouldn’t mind?” You know he doesn’t.

His scent envelopes you like a thick fog when he approaches you. His calloused fingers pinch the clasp and pull it down its tracks slowly. The sound is piercing in the quiet of your shared room; your senses dialed up to 11. You can feel his warm, freshly minty breath fan over your shoulders and the nape of your neck. Your arms erupt in goosebumps at the sensation.

He stands there, he realizes, longer than he needs to. 

“Okay I’m gonna-” “There you go-” you both speak at the same time. 

You huff an awkward breath of a laugh before you finish your thought, “I’m gonna..go change.” you throw a thumb behind you in the direction of the ensuite. “Right, yeah,” he shakes his head as if to escape his own thoughts; his turn to act shy.

-

Lying in bed, you’re suddenly grateful that Steve has always been something of a personal space heater. The warmth he radiates makes you want to curl into him, against your better judgment. The silence in the room is deafening; the only sounds to be heard are rhythmic breathing and the creaking of the ancient plumbing.

“Can I tell you a secret?” Steve’s voice is hoarse, no doubt from the boisterous singing he’d been doing earlier in the evening. Still, you’re grateful for the crack in the wall that's been plastered between you.

“I like secrets,”

“I hate weddings.”

The stiff fabric of the pillowcase crinkles as you turn your head to look at him.

“I am happy for them, it’s not that,” he starts, “it’s just, what if it’s never me up there ya know?”  It’s not that he’s scared he’ll never marry; it’s that he’s scared he’ll never marry you.

You want to reach out for him then. Hold his face in your hands and tell him you understand. There are so many unspoken words between you. Things unsaid, but implied. The desire to yell and scream and confess how much you love him is overwhelming.

“Steve. You’re only twenty,” smiling lightheartedly, “there’s so much time for you. There are plenty of women out there that would be delighted to swear themselves to you for eternity. Believe me.” You chuckle and pretend like the reason you know that to be the truth isn’t because you’re one of them.

“I know, I know,” he brings a hand up to card through his bed mussed hair, “you’re right, it’s silly.”

“I didn’t say it was silly,” you elbow his side gently, consequently moving your body closer to his.

He doesn’t say anything then. Instead, his hand cautiously moves over the bed until it’s touching yours; intertwining your pinkies. He doesn’t breathe, as if any sudden movements might scare you like a frightened doe. If he breathes, you might remember you’re not supposed to be doing this.

“If we’re not married by the time we’re,” he pretends to ponder, “32, will you marry me?”

You laugh, the unexpected loudness of it making you cringe a little, “yes,”

“Promise?” He sounds deadly serious.

You tighten your pinky around his, “Promise.”

[dmc-tings]

It’s been a while since I requested anything off tumblr! (Hope I’m doing it right) would you kindly write dating headcanons for Vergil? ❤️❤️

(Looks right to me lmao. Also I felt like this needed a sort of into to the dating, so enjoy)

Dating Headcannons for Vergil

First of all... what did you do to get the Alpha and Omega to notice you?

He doesn't just pick anyone.

Really we think Nero's mom got lucky

It was actually through Lady you and the Blue Devil met

She brought you too the shop

HEART THROB

He just saw you from across the room

Hehe, of course Dante saw the small signs if his big brother's interest

The straighter back, smoothed out shoulders, and you can't forget the lack of him showing off his arms (that vest? Fuckin please. Dude's got arms for days.)

But you clearly weren't impressed.

It took Trish to tell him it wasn't it.

Dante was happy to laugh at his suffering

Vergil promptly stopped peacocking

But... he still didn't know how to approach you

You're... quiet. Observant.

Like himself.

For a while it was just... longful looks from him.

But then (without reason) Dante suggested that you ask Vergil about Demon stuff.

Ah. His magnum opus... of himself anyways

That's when you went over to him finally

"Lemme talk to ya."

Oha? Not so shy then. More cautious

That led to a rabbit hole (No pun) that you fell down

Eventually Vergil let you accompany him to his favorite library... the only one in Redgrave (one could assume he simply just opened a portal to where he wanted)

And you? You took him to little quaint cafe's, or parks that didn't have too many people

Nook and cranny or hole in the wall places that didn't have people staring at him

He adored it

Mostly because he wasn't bothered

But your company, more over the private time with you, allowed him to see you

And he's a hopeless romantic.

So the day he asked you to be his (and only his) you gave him a sweet kiss... on the cheek

Gave ya mans the "butterflies" and he went home red eared

(Here are the relationship stuff)

Vergil... is horribly like a demon. He spent so many years in Hell or under Mundus' brainwashing, he's more devil than human

He... like a giant cat, he leaves dead devils heads or limbs at your doorstep.

You had to SCOLD him for it

He was, unreasonably, pissed. That wasn't good enough?

His "rizzlord" of a brother tried to help

It did not go well

Between the awkward "ayo girl's" or the tragic "Call me Mr Flintstone, cause I can make yo bed rock" (which Vergil didn't even know what the fuck that meant)

You told him "Verge. Stop listening to your brother. Anyone else would have called the police on you."

Dante got a proper beating that day

So Vergil eventually said fuck it and started to read those cheesy romance books

Things turned around then

Flowers. Chocolates. Your favorite foods.

A more normal human relationship

He is chivalrous

Fast to open doors for you, or pull out your chair

And a fast fist to anyone who makes you uncomfortable

He just can tell ok?

A little bit too close to him? Or an avoidant stare?

He's all action. No verbal warning.

YOU noticed the signs of him ready to swing

It's lighting fast. His eye twitches, and a head swivel. When he finds the target you have maybe second to grab him.

You usually are too slow though.

A sickening crack and someone is sleep

And it ain't neither of you

Vergil also likes to cook

Yes. Human food.

Superb sense of taste, he can almost tell you exactly what's in a dish

So asking him for something specific is easy. (I like to think he's kinda like Ignis from FFXV)

Sorry. But intimacy is a challenge to him

He's really like a cat

He'll come to you when he's ready

It's usually slow, heavy and careful steps

Visually cautious

"May I sit with you?"

Of course you don't deny- why did he sit so far away

He's like on the far end of the couch

Give him an hour

He slowly scoots closer

But... there about a 4 inches away from you

He does this so you can choose to close the distance

You usually do.

Hehe red ears.

He doesn't let his face heat up, but his ears. Hims ears always burn up

And then the small cocky grin he gives himself. Satisfaction

With that you basically tell him it's ok to grab you up

In his lap

Mf will fall asleep with you like this

Ah.

No one thought he'd have a safe haven in you

[aurynsia]

Unrequited, Terrifying Chapter 3

James Potter x Reader

Summary: A boy in your class haunts your search for your secret admirer, uncovering some feelings you thought you lost years before…

Warnings: Some very subtle sexual implications, secret admirer trope, extremely fluffy, nervous!james x shy!reader, some subtle wolfstar action in the background, idiots in love, oc!friends, lovesick!james, no use of Y/N, James is a virgin, reader is referred to with she/her pronouns, oblivious!reader, Remus being the most supportive and helpful friend James has ever had, reader is a bit of a nerd, NOT EDITED!

Word count: 1.5K

Series Masterlist

Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7

——————— ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

Potions concluded with the setting sun. You adjusted in your seat to reach your bag, dropping supplies into its dark void. You had managed to phase the unusual situation you were in to the back of your mind, forgetting your secret admirer as you completed the class work. This was, however, short lived.

You turned back to your desk and spotted a folded note on its surface, the paper identical to the one you received the night before. You attempted to conceal your growing curiosity and excitement as you swiftly snatched it and launched yourself out of your chair, bag in hand.

Turning to leave the room, you thought of your friends’ ecstatic faces at the discovery of a new note, before-

Bump.

“Oh Merlin, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to…” You turned your frame to face the source of disruption, air pushed from your lungs for just a second. There stood a tentative James Potter, a splattering of rose appearing on his cheeks at your eye contact. “Um, I- I’m sorry!” He rambled, rushing away before you could even consider the interaction.

Your stomach quietly dipped and flipped at the contact, creating an unfamiliar warmth which you quickly forced down as you shook your head with a small smile. James Potter, ladies man, smooth talker and prank puller couldn’t even form a coherent sentence around you. Strange. Though, at least he apologised this time.

You exited the classroom, remembering the note you held in your hand, and practically skipped towards the Gryffindor common room with bubbling enthusiasm.

——————— ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

“And then I just froze! I can’t help it, her eyes are so captivating and she smells really good and the way she clutched the note so protectively made my heart flutter!” James finished his rambling, looking around his dorm in disbelief as his friends snickered affectionately.

“Good Merlin, Prongs! Every attractive bird you bump into like that at post-match parties would be subject to a dousing of charm, flirtations, and charisma by now…” Sirius quipped with a smirk, amused by the boy’s rare, flustered look hiding behind his hands.

“I mean, of course she’s a pretty one, Prongs, but what’s stopping you from wooing her like all the rest?” Silence fell on the group as James considered Sirius’ words. “Well, I don’t know, Prongs, maybe it’s because- well, you know, you’ve been…saving yourself…for h-“ Peter attempted, choosing not to finish his sentence after the entourage of warning glares met his eyes.

“James, Peter might have a point…for once…” Remus spoke after some consideration. “You obviously view her differently to all the other girls you’ve spoken to, and I know the reason you hesitate with all the rest is because you wish they were her…” Remus glanced at the raven-haired boy sitting on his bed as he said those last words, who was unaware as he moved to console James.

The young Potter was arched over, with his elbows on his knees and his face in the palms of his hands. His bed dipped under the weight of Sirius taking a seat beside him.

“Prongs, let me put it bluntly,” Sirius began, “you’ll have to either man up, chat her up and finally get the girl you deserve, or move on and bloody kiss someone else already. It’s no use pining over her if she doesn’t even know you’re pining! Now what did that second note say?”

——————— ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

“‘You look so pretty today, I really like how you did your hair! And thank you for all your explanations in the class discussion, it really helped me stay on top of my grades with a beautiful thing like you sitting near me.’ He drew a little winking face next to that, ‘Forever yours.” Charlie and Hope burst into a fit of giggles after you recited the most recent note.

“He’s obsessed with you! This is so cute!” Charlie squealed, holding your shoulders and shaking you slightly for emphasis. “You know what this means, right? He must be in your potions class!” Hope stated with a smirk, leaning across from her seat on the floor to pick up your list of potential suitors.

“Let’s see, that leaves us with about…five options!” She exclaimed. Your bewildered expression contrasted her excitement, crawling over to her position on the dorm room floor. One, two, three, four…five. You counted the Gryffindor boys in your potions class as your eyes widened.

One name stuck out to you in particular: James Potter. As if sharing the same thought, Charlie brightened as she spotted the same name on the paper. “Potter is in that class! Oh my, my…you are quite the catch aren’t you, love?” She teased, inching closer to your warming face. “Ooh! You’re blushing! Are you sure you really got over him all those years ago, hmm?” Hope joined Charlie in closing the distance between all three of you as your cheeks gave you away.

“Of course I’m over him! That was in fourth year…well, maybe…ugh, it doesn’t matter! It’s probably not him anyway, I mean, I can’t imagine him finding the time to do any of this with his adoring fan club constantly surrounding him…” you muttered.

“But it could really be him! I mean, you were saying he gets all nervous and awkward around you, there’s a chance that could mean-“ You stopped Charlie’s rabbit hole of conspiracy, choosing not to dwell on the matter longer.

“There are four others on this list, it’s best if we cover all our bases.” Hope reasoned, joining you in rationality and convincing Charlie to do the same. “Let’s keep an eye out for any of these distinguished gentlemen paying extra attention to our darling friend.”

——————— ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

The quiet night caused the atmosphere of the Gryffindor house to soften under the soft glow of the crescent moon. Remus couldn’t sleep. It was almost too peaceful, and he didn’t like it.

Sitting up in his bed, he glanced over the figures of his friends, their chests softly rising with each breath they took. Slinking into the cloak of darkness by the door, he slowly opened the door and forged a path to the common room.

There, sat under the light of a lamp, was a flowing cascade of your hair over the back of the couch. You were hunched over paper, concentrating on your History of Magic homework.

“Hey, can I join you?” Remus attempted not to startle you as he rounded the corner, joining you on the coach after you noticed his presence and nodded in confirmation.

Remus was always the more mature member of the Marauders, more focused on his studies than pranking innocent students.

“So, listen,” He began after a beat, “You’re working on History of Magic, right? I’ve noticed you’re really excelling in that class and, not to brag, but I’m quite good at it too.” You met his gaze. “I know, I’ve seen your writing. You clearly work hard.” You replied, instilling that Gryffindor courage in every word that would have normally been absent during interactions such as this, often causing you to dismiss the compliment with a shy smile.

Remus allowed himself a small grin at your unfamiliar nonchalance, continuing his proposition. “Oh, thank you! Well, I was wondering if you wanted to team up. I could be your study partner, and we could top the class together! I’ll teach you anything you’re not sure about, and I’d ask for the same in return.” You turned his proposal over in your mind, causing a small moment of silence between you two.

“There are some years I’m not so familiar with, and I certainly could do with the clarification. So sure, Remus, I’ll be your study partner!” You smiled warmly, comfortable in the newfound knowledge that the boy wasn’t a possible face behind your recently received love confessions. You found his proposition to be a friendly gesture, and far more genuine than any action you’d expect from a Marauder.

“Great!” He cheered, “We can start tomorrow. I often sit with my friends in the library, if you’re willing to join…” Remus trailed off, hoping you’d sit with his lovestruck friend for a few hours in the name of good grades.

“I’ll be there, Remus, thank you for the offer.” The words escaped your mouth before you had a chance to consider them, but Remus was already delighted by your acceptance. “I’ll see you tomorrow then, love, goodnight.”

He flashed a soft smile your way as he stood to return to his bed, leaving you bathing in the light of the lamp with an optimistic fluttering in your stomach.

You decided to leave it be, along with the hope that the boy with the rounded glasses would be there to get all flustered over you again, nagging that sweet, romantic side of your brain.

——————— ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ———————

A/N: Woohoo, here we go! I hope you’re all excited for some tooth aching fluff in the next chapter because it looks like reader is warming up to the Marauders >.< Thank you so much for reading this series, and be sure to like and reblog! Comment to be added to the tag list so you don’t miss chapter 4!

[theblackfemininesociety]

💎 Our Top 10 Tips for Making The Best out of The New Year:

Tip #1: Allow God to be your foundation.

God has to be the firmest foundation in your life. Go to him with and for everything. With the Most High, you are not only protected, corrected and forgiven, you are also loved beyond measures and guided to your highest potential. This year there will be many obstacles but remember Jesus is The Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6) and you are never alone!

Tip #2 : Be Intentional.

It’s as simple as it sounds, do everything with intention 💎 you simply can not afford to play with your potential this year. You are too valuable. Every decision, every action, and every thought should be aligned with your deeper purpose. When you approach life with clarity and focus, you create a ripple effect that transforms not only your own experience but also those around you. Embrace this mindset, and watch how opportunities flourish, relationships deepen, and fulfillment becomes a consistent part of your journey. Intentional living is not just a practice; it’s a lifestyle that leads to profound growth and connection. Always speak life into yourself and your situation. So, take a moment to reflect on your intentions and let them guide you toward a life that resonates with your true self.

Tip #3: Learn when & how to say NO.

As the new year approaches, remember that being selfish can be a positive trait. We're not suggesting you become like Ebenezer Scrooge, but it's important to know when to prioritize yourself. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Saying "no" doesn’t mean you’re failing those who love and respect you—keep that in mind.

Tip #4: If it doesn’t align, let it fly.

As the new year approaches, it's the perfect time to confidently reflect on your experiences—recognizing what worked and what didn’t. This year, you'll master the art of identifying what truly aligns with your goals and what you need to release. Trust yourself and embrace this journey ahead.

Tip #5: Self-care isn’t just a luxury, it’s a necessity.

As a woman, it's crucial to prioritize self-care. Women of BFS understand that self-care is an essential part of their journey. When you feel empowered and confident, you'll align yourself with becoming the best version of yourself. Self-care isn't just about pampering your outer appearance—though that is important—but also about nurturing your mind and soul. This is how you heal and effortlessly exist in your femininity. So, this year, self-care is a must sis. Take care of yourself.

Tip #6: If you can’t afford to buy it twice, don’t buy it once.

We told you, There is nothing soft about being broke (see post here) a game changer this year will be how you decide to invest and save your money. If you can’t afford to buy it twice, don’t buy it once. How you handle $100 will determine how you will handle $1000. Luxury is a mindset thing before an aesthetic. The fools will blow it, the wise will multiply it.

Tip #7: Stay Exclusive

Tap into your IT GIRL energy this upcoming year. Dont let everyone have access to you. This includes your body, ladies! You must protect your energy. Being exclusive also means staying true to who you are. This is how your aura is created... Have you ever seen a woman who is so authentic that she draws people in effortlessly? Her confidence radiates, and her presence is felt long after she has left the room. It's as if she has a magnetic yet mysterious quality that sets her apart from the rest. This woman is YOU this year. Tap into HER! 💋

Tip #8: Dont double back & stand on it!

9 times out of 10, you’ve been released from that experience for a reason. Whether is a job, a man, a friendship or even a bad habit! You must avoid returning to what caused you pain and hindered your purpose. Take your L’s as lessons and move forward with more wisdom and knowledge. What’s behind you can rarely comprehend what’s ahead of you, don’t bring dead weight into this new year!

Tip #9: Don't be afraid to be SEEN!!

Listen, we know all too well how much an isolation season is needed but so is your pop-out season sis. God didn’t put you in that season for you to hide all that he’s been working within you. You can do this and still be humble, and kind and still give thanks to GOD. When you pop out think of it as being released from the shackles of the enemy! THEY CAN'T HOLD YOU DOWN! So many times we get too comfortable in our preparation season; we start sleeping on the very thing we were designed to become! Don’t let that be your reality this year babe.

Tip #10: Take The Risk.

Bet on yourself! This is a year that you will be happy to do things that scare you! Believe in yourself! This is the year to embrace challenges that intimidate you! View this as a chance for personal growth and development. You will learn that when the year is done, you will appreciate the fact that you have stepped outside your comfort zone and tried; putting you in positions you never thought you'll be in! You miss 100% of of the shots you dont take. 💋

────── ⋆⋅🩷📲🫂⋅⋆ ──────

We’re basically besties now!

Let’s stay connected! 🫶🏽🫶🏿🫶🏾

Follow Us on: Instagram • Discord • Facebook

[swanlakex]

As a irl hairstylist, I can’t get the idea of doing Hayden Christensen’s hair/makeup on set. So here you go. 😁😁😁

Being Hayden Christensen’s film stylist was a job you never thought you’d land.

The industry is so unforgiving to less-experienced, younger hairstylists. Most companies hire a crew of 3-4 ladies, and never look for more until the eldest retires. (Like the Supreme Court) It’s a long cycle, and you were ready to spend years climbing the ladder to do what you loved.

Then your first gig was practically your dream job.

Working as a stylist on George Lucas’ set of Revenge of The Sith, you had your hands full. There were dozens of wigs, hours of SFX makeup, and plenty of styles to do. But you were ecstatic. And better yet, the actors adored you. You were a breath of fresh air from the typical grouchy, 50 year old stylists that complained about their swollen feet and the “new generation”. Not you- you were funny, patient, and talkative. Making friends was definitely the best part of your job.

Natalie was so sweet, and she always talked to you about the latest book she had been nose-deep in. They were interesting, even despite being non-fiction. Plus, she had no problem being your Guinea pig for new styles and ideas you conjured up. She would sit in your chair forever, if she had the time of course. She’s a busy girl!

Ewan opened up to you when you started playing your own music in the wardrobe. Of course, you played oldies for him specifically, but he was surprised that “kids still have taste these days”. Ewan was hilarious too, and a great listener. He would ask about your day, and actually care about the answer. He’d ask questions and tease you for hitting a curb on your way to the set that day. When you finally got him out of the chair, he’d fist bump you before whipping around and marching out the room.

Hayden, however, was a bit of a different story. He wasn’t very talkative, in fact, he seemed a little shy; a strict contrast to his character. Of course, he was very polite, but he kept to himself really. You didn’t mind this, it was always comfortable silence. Plus, his peace really came in handy on those chaotic days. You didn’t really think twice about it until you called Hayden in for wardrobe, and Ewan turned to him, smiled, and poked him. “Oh, come on..” You heard Hayden say back to Ewan with a grin on his face as he headed towards you. What was that about? Weird.

You started with makeup first. It was the scene where Anakin had turned to the dark side, and his face was full-on Sith Lord. It was going to take a bit longer than it usually would. He sits in the chair, and you clip his hair back. “You excited to turn me evil today?” He says with a smile.

You turn around, mixing the foundation onto your hand. “It’s the very reason I woke up today.”

He lets out an airy chuckle, repositioning in his seat to a more relaxed demeanor.

As you pat the base layer on his face, you ask “Have you seen the contacts you’re wearing yet?”

“No I have not..” He says, opening his eyes.

You turn to the table and pick them up, opening the lid and showing him.

“Oh, that’s awesome. I’m gonna look like a lizard.”

You chuckle. “I hope you have experience with contacts, because I do not. So if you need help, we’re a little screwed.”

He waves your concern away. “Nah, it’s all good. I can put ‘em in.”

You continue his base, and as you finish, he speaks again. “Y’know, I never asked.. How long have you been doing this?”

Your eyebrows furrow at the unexpected question. But hey, you’re not complaining. Having a gorgeous man in your chair asking you questions is never a problem to you. “Well, I’ve been doing hair since.. I was a junior in high school.”

His face makes a puzzled look.

“Grade 11.” You explain, knowing he’s Canadian, so he’s probably not familiar with American grades.

“Ahh..” he says. “That’s a long time.”

“Not as long as everybody else around here..”

“But you’re still better than ‘em.” He whispers, not wanting to offend the other artists.

Your eyes widen in shock. You smile. “Why thank you, Mr. Christensen..” you say in a funny, teasing voice.

“Please,” he scoffs. “I’m not forty.”

“I’m aware.” You joke as you bend closer to him with eyeliner in your hand. “Alright, for this you have to stay very still. No sudden movements, ‘Kay?”

He just nods and stares straight ahead. “I won’t even breathe.”

You giggle and shake your head. “Might need you to breathe, Hayden.”

He whispers a small “Okay.” And stays still as you draw small cracks around his eyes. A quarter of the way through, you notice he’s been staring at you this whole time. You keep going, but he never looks away.

“Y’know..” you say softly with a smile on your face “most people close their eyes for this part..”

“Oh. Right. Sorry.” He closes his eyes.

A minute later, he opens one again.

You stand up from the two of you laughing, grabbing a Q-tip to clean up the edges. “You’re funny today.” You state.

“Am I not funny every day?” He interrogates.

You shrug. “Sorry. Extra funnier today.”

He gives a “Hmph.” And nods.

You finish his makeup, smiling like an idiot the whole time. Now you just have to install the extensions, have him put in the contacts, then he’s done.

“Wig time.” You sing, plucking the hair extensions from the mannequin labeled SKYWALKER.

“Do you want me to close my eyes for this one too?”

You chuckle, and shake your head no.

“Good, cause I like lookin’ at you.”

WHAT THE FUUUUUCKKKKK?? Your stomach was suddenly swarmed with butterflies. No way he’s hitting on you. No way. Either way, you could not fumble this. Act cool.

Hayden’s face was flushed, he was obviously freaking out that he said that too.

“Yeah? Well I’m quite flattered,” you respond. “..Mr. Christensen.” You tease, breaking the awkward air. He chuckles and shakes his head. You clip in his extensions, teasing and roughing them up. “In fact, there’s a get-together Natalie and I are going to later tonight. Plenty of music and people. I’d love if you came.” He looks up to you.

“Just you and Natalie? No Ewan?” You ask.

“Nah, he’s too old.” He jokes. Suddenly, you hear a shout from outside the door.

“I heard that, you little twat!” Ewan cries from the muffled door. Hayden whips around. “What- How long have you been listening??”

You hear a faint trail of giggles travel down the hall. You laugh so hard you have to put your curling iron down. Hayden sighs. Once you recover, you answer.

“I’d love to go. Can you send me the address?”

“Really? Yeah, of course.” You hand him your phone and he types in his number as you finish his hair up. He hands it back to you.

“Thanks. Alright, you can put your contacts in now. The bathroom is right there if you need a sink.” You instruct him as you hand over the contacts. He smiles, nods, and walks into the bathroom. A few minutes later, he comes out.

“Woah!” You call out. “You look..terrifying..”

He smiles darkly, and it’s kinda hot.

“Ah, don’t tell me I’ve changed your mind then.”

You shake your head. “Not in the slightest.”

He grins, hands you back the case, and thanks you as he struts out the door. “Hope to see you there!” He calls out.

“See ya!” As soon as he leaves you watch him walk onto set from a crack in the door. He strides over to Ewan and bends over to whisper something. Ewan’s face lights up and he throws a hand up for a high-five.

20 minutes later, you get a buzz from your phone.

846 York Ave.

Can’t wait. ;)

-Your favorite Sith Lord

[anyarose011]

Shame Was on the Other Side

->Bucky Barnes X Single Mom!reader

Summary: You were only meant to teach a children's ballet class in Manhattan for one day. Out of all the days, it had to be the one where a dark entity loomed over the city, and you had no idea where your boyfriend was.

Part 1 of 2 (Masterlist)

Warning: References to past trauma, but nothing too explicit (yet), ANGST, and Spoilers for Thunderbolts*

Saw Thunderbolts* a few days ago, and I can confidently say I should've seen it yesterday (shit hit the fan for me lmao). Anywho, I got an idea from it, and wanted to give more of a realistic depiction of what would happen if a lot of people relived their worst traumas (more of that will come later, but just wanted to start with some foreplay as one might say).

Word Count: 3.9k

“I know you girls can hold it longer.” You encouraged from the front of the room, leaning against the large mirror on the wall.

Nine little girls from ages ten to twelve, including your now ten-year-old Clementine, balanced on one foot as they held their arms in first position. It was almost funny watching nine little ballet shoes on the ground trying to stand as tall as they could under the weight of children wearing an array of colored leotards and skirts.

The facial expressions didn’t help either; most of them either scowling or sucking their lips in and staring at a single spot on the pale blue wall to focus. Clem, of course, was glaring out the three windows as if they were her worst enemies.

“Okay,” you said after the piano music on your phone stopped. “and relax.”

A chorus of groans bounced off the plastered walls, the girls either hanging off the barres or hunching over themselves.

“Now none of that!” You laugh. “Prima ballerinas don’t whine.”

“You’re the only one in here!” Little Hannah sassed.

You shook your head. “I almost was. Alright, it’s 4:30 now. Whoever has pointe, get your shoes on and we’ll wait for the older girls to get in. Thank you, ladies.”

You curtsy and they copied. Four of them left excitedly, either onto their next dance lesson or out to their parents. The rest of the girls went to the cubbies in the corner, drinking water and putting on their shoes. As a larger group of teenage girls walked in, you took a seat by your daughter, who was taking off her ballet shoes and putting on her Jazz ones.

“How was school?” You asked, taking your pointe shoes out of your bag.

She shrugged. “Okay.”

“Just okay?”

“A girl said I laugh too loud.” She whispered.

You swore kids were becoming meaner these days. Even in your classes in Brooklyn you saw the dramatic change since the Blip. You’d taught before then, and they all seemed kinder; more willing to talk. Yet, after a collective, traumatic moment, they were never the same.

“Would you ever want to be her?” You questioned, trying to eliminate your cynicism.

She sighed. “No.”

You kissed her head. “I know words hurt, but her opinion shouldn’t matter if you would never want to crawl into her skin and walk around in it.”

She scrunched her nose. “Huh?”

“I’ll tell you more at home. Now go to Jazz.”

Clementine smiled, stood up, taking her bag and leaving; that was, before turning over her heel. “Did Bucky call?”

Your lips formed a tight smile, shaking your head. “Not yet, but I’ll come find you when he does.”

Her own grin fell. “He usually does by now.”

“You know him,” you forced a laugh. “always busy.”

She hummed but then left the room. Letting out a long sigh, you pursed your lips. Bucky moved to DC almost two months ago, and you didn’t leave…on the best of terms. You managed to apologize(ish) to each other right before he left, but you weren’t kidding yourself, that was mainly for Clem’s sake.

And you hated how smart she was; she knew something was going on. If anything, the only reason she probably didn’t think you both were breaking up was because Bucky left Alpine with both of you when he left.

Still, you both wanted to make this work. You had been dating him for a year now, and every day you had to remind yourself why you loved him.

You did say that word; both of you did. So, it was real.

And you were willing to try; you’d spoken to him a week ago, and yes, you and Clem were going to come out to DC and-.

Your phone vibrated beside you.

Looking down, you saw Bucky’s name and an embarrassing photo Clem took of him while he was sleeping, show up on your screen.

You grinned, picking it up and turning to the girls in the room. “Start stretching.”

“Is your boyfriend calling?” Hannah teased, and all the girls, yes even the eighteen-year-old seniors, started ‘ooo’ing.

“Another word, and we’re doing nothing but bourrées across the floor for half an hour.”

When you left, you shut the door on a bunch of giggling girls. The company you worked for grew substantially within the year, letting them buy a location in Manhattan. You usually taught at the one in Brooklyn, but the ballet teacher called in sick, and you had to fill in.

It was a hassle, and the studio was much smaller than the one in Brooklyn; as in, there were only three rooms, and thus, three teachers to accommodate for the forty students. Yet, there was something sweet about being in crowded rooms filled with a combined passion but also a playful attitude towards dance.

True, you were essentially the dinosaur and eldest there; the other two teachers either starting college or just getting out of it. Still, it wasn’t as hard to lead on the short day that you were there.

Squeezing past little girls and boys on their way to class, you sat on one of the benches in the waiting room, answering the call.

“How are you, Aragorn?”

You told him to grow out his hair last summer, and he did. Thus, resulting in him looking like a Dollar Tree Viggo Mortenson from Lord of the Rings. Although, the beauty on his face stayed the same.

“Where are you?” His voice sounded seemingly neutral, but you knew him so well; he was rattled.

“Working?” You answered, although it sounded more like a question. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” He sighed.

You rose your brows. “Are you still with that random Russian guy you were driving with yesterday?”

“Where are you?”

Now it was getting weird. “I’m working, I told you-.”

“-What’s the address?”

“What’s going on?”

He said your name, agitated. “What’s the address?”

Now it was getting scary. You hissed, trying to keep your voice down. “No, you tell me what the hell is going on right now.”

A pause followed, but it didn’t last for long. His breath shuttered. “You and Clem need to leave wherever you are.”

You felt your soul drop into your stomach and form pit. “What?”

“Honey,” he begged. “tell me where you are and I’ll come get you.”

“Bucky-.”

“-It’s Valentina.” He said, and you felt the air leave your lungs. “We…she’s worse than we thought, and I-I don’t know if she will but I’m not taking any chances. I need you and Clem safe and-.”

He stopped talking. At first, you thought it was because he couldn’t even speak aloud what he assumes would happen to you, but then the silence grew longer.

“Bucky?” You asked again, your voice once firm now meek.

Nothing.

“James.” You tried to speak sternly.

“Stay where you are.” Broke through the tension. “I love you.”

He hung up.

You didn’t pull the phone away from your ear right away. A part of you hoped he’d call back, even if there was nothing but his own breathing on the other end.

A tightness began to constrict your chest; one so horrible you wanted to scream, but one also so horrible you couldn’t. Standing on shaky legs, you looked around. Of course, no one else reacted the way you were at that moment. They hadn’t heard the cryptid call.

You looked into the blue room, where all the older girls were stretching and warming up, laughing at something someone said. Then, you watched as one of them took their leg off the barre and moved to stand closer to the window. She turned over her shoulder, bidding the other girls to come over, and they followed.

Pushing the door open, you entered the room. Some of the girls looked over at you but ultimately turned back to the window when you said nothing. Pushing yourself forward, your jaw dropped at what they saw.

Several blocks down, where the old Avenger’s Tower stood, a black figure suspended in the air.

“What’s that?” One of the high schoolers asked, fear trembling in her voice.

“Is it…a new Avenger?” A younger girl replied.

You couldn’t say anything. That tightness made its way into your stomach, and it began to ache. Your mind was telling you to go, and so you listened. Leaving on shaking legs, you pushed your way into the green room next door, where the Jazz group of smaller children also stared out the window.

You found Clementine among the crowd and took her hand.

“What’s happening?” She tried not to trip over her own feet as you pulled her out of the room.

“I don’t know.” And you didn’t; all you knew was that neither of you were safe.

You rushed through the waiting room, and just as you were at the door leading to the stairwell, a sharp cry rang out.

“Get away from the windows!” One of the teachers yelled, and a few screams were heard before silence soon followed.

It hadn’t even registered with you. Shadows encased every wall around you, and all you could do was fall to the floor, shielding your little girl with your entire body before the darkness forced you into its embrace.

It didn’t feel like it had been two hours since…since….

Since….

The water from the kitchen sink scorched your skin as you stared at the blank wall in front of you. It was around six when you’d finally got back to your Brooklyn apartment. Clementine, exhausted from the whole day, took Alpine and went to her room as soon as you got home. You assumed she was sleeping.

You hadn’t changed out of your leotard or skirt and tights. You practically collapsed on the couch and stared at the blank tv in front of you for twenty minutes before then deciding to do the dishes you left in the sink that morning.

You’d only got one done and then stared at the wall in front of you, letting the hot water run down your hands.

Everything seemed too much as soon as you…as soon as you’d awoken from…

The sound of everyone’s voices as you walked down the streets were too loud, the lights when you entered your apartment were too bright...Your body was sore from…from…

A knock on the door snapped you back to reality and you jumped. Shutting off the sink, you froze as you stood in the kitchen. Another knock soon followed, as well as the sound of your name.

“Honey, it’s me.”

You sped to the door and didn’t bother looking through the peephole. Unlatching and unlocking it, you threw the door open. There, looking like absolute shit, covered in sweat with a few scrapes along with face, your Bucky.

He tossed his arms around you before you could, pressing his face into your neck. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, nails sinking into his shirt to make sure he was real. You wanted to cry, God knows you wanted to cry until your eyes hurt and all you could feel was him.

Bucky pulled away just enough to look at you, but his breath still lingered on your skin.

“Are you okay? Are you alright?”

“I…” you couldn’t find the words. “Are you?”

“I asked you.”

You nodded. “Uh huh.”

“Why didn’t you pick up?” He kissed your head. “I called you so many times.”

“My…my phone died.”

He shook his head, saying your name before a cacophony of voices was heard at the end of the hall. You clung to him.

“It’s okay,” he soothed. “I know them.”

“You made new friends?” You attempted humor.

Apparently, it worked because he cracked a grin. “Coworkers mostly but maybe. Did you hear the news?”

“No?”

“New Avengers.” He pursed his lips. “Valentina assigned us. It’s a long story.”

“Oh, Valentina as in the one you thought was going to come kill me and Clem?” You couldn’t help it.

“I didn’t want to take any chances, I’m sorry.” He looked around your apartment. “Where is she anyway?”

“Sleeping with Alpine in her room.” You sighed. “It’s been a long day.”

He kissed your cheek. “I get it. I’ll tell them to go and-.”

“-No.” You didn’t know why you were saying it, but you did. “You invited them. I’ll make something for dinner.”

Bucky gave you a look. “Are you sure?”

You nodded. “You guys must be exhausted. As long as they don’t mind SpaghettiOs, Kraft Mac and Cheese, and Pizza Rolls.”

“They’ll be happy with anything.” He kissed your lips, finally. “Thank you, so much, you’re an angel.”

You hummed, still smiling. “You wouldn’t have called me that a few months ago.”

Call it a trauma response, call it you being a bitch, you were flying off the mouth that day.

He swallowed, hands falling to yours and squeezing them. “I’ll only keep them here for dinner, and then they’re gone. We’ll talk after, okay?”

You nodded. “Just tell them to keep it down when they’re coming in.”

 He gave you another kiss on the cheek before leaving. He kissed you in the few minutes you saw each other again than the last week before he left for DC.

The sudden thought brought tears to your eyes, and you berated yourself for that almost making you cry that day. Still, once you took a deep breath, threw on a spare sweatshirt, and began to get out packaged dinner floor, the sound of hushed voices soon entered your apartment.

There were six people in your living room, all covered in an array of soot, dust, blood, sweat, and tears. You only recognized two; Bucky and John Walker. Even then, the latter you knew of.

The tallest of them, wearing a red suit with a white star on his chest, approached you with a smile on his face. He took your hand, shaking it and stage whispering.

“Thank you so much for your hospitality, Ms. Bucky Barnes’ girlfriend! We appreciate it and will be respectful guests. I too am a father and understand-.”

The woman with blonde hair shoved him. “Alright, that’s enough. Thank you very much.” She said your name.

You chuckled. “Of course, it’s the least I could do.”

Assessing everyone else, you saw another woman with brown hair and what looked like to be a spacesuit immediately take her place on the couch. The only other one who you hadn’t recognized was a man whose hair began to curl at his neck and wore an oversized blue sweatshirt. He seemed different from the others; quiet in a sense of not knowing what to say instead of for intimidation.

“Okay, names.” You smiled. “I don’t know any of you.”

And so, thus began the circle of names and getting to know who your boyfriend’s new coworkers/friends were. Alexei (the Red Guardian) Ava (Ghost), Yelena (an ex-Widow), John Walker (ex-Captain America), and Bob (just Bob, apparently…).

“Well, it’s very nice to meet you. I’ll make something.” You threw on another smile and immediately turned back to the attached kitchen, not really knowing what else to do or say.

Luckily, as you heard everyone else plop themselves down to sit (whether it was on the couch, at the small dining room table, or even on the floor), you also heard Yelena ask.

“Bucky said you were a ballerina?”

“Was.” You looked over your shoulder as you got a pot out from a cabinet. “I teach kids now.”

“Oh my god,” Bob stood up from the floor, reaching for a can of SpaghettiOs. “I haven’t had these in years!”

You grinned. “I’ll make that one first then.”

John spoke up. “Where do you teach?”

“A friend’s dance studio in Brooklyn, mostly.”

“Barnes said you were in Manhattan when…”

A silence hung in the air; one you didn’t waste time to fill.

“Yeah, I heard about that.” You opened a drawer and took out the can opener. “I was on the subway back to here when it happened.”

Even without looking, you could feel Bucky’s steely gaze on you. Of course, even if it weren’t for you already on edge attitude, the timeline didn’t make sense; how could you have gone to the subway station in the same time you hung up and then the darkness came for you? You felt as if the rest of them could practically smell your lie. Yet, they said nothing about it.

“What about the rest of you?” You deflected, then nodded at Bucky. “If this one’s sticking around, then maybe it’s best I know you.”

They surprisingly laughed. Conversation from then on was easy; someone would talk, and the others would interrupt. At least the extroverts would; those being John, Yelena, and Alexei. Sometimes Ava would jump in, but only ever to tease John with Yelena. The ones who barely said anything unless spoken to were Bob and Bucky.

Bucky you were used to; if anything, you missed his quietness. He’d let you talk on and on about anything, and you never once thought he tuned you out. Even then, in your crowded living room, as someone told a long, drawn-out story (usually Alexei), he’d make eye contact with you across the room as you cooked. All he’d do was give you that same smile you fell in love with.

Bob was different. He looked around your apartment both with a level of genuine interest, but also as if he were waiting for something bad to happen. Unless someone (usually Yelena) talked to him, the only time he spoke up was to remind everyone that there was someone sleeping in another room.

He was sweet.

It was the first time when he made a joke you were carrying two bowls of newly made soup, that as you were laughing, you bumped your side into the corner of the counter.

Now on a normal day, you would’ve stumbled over your feet and cursed like you were being paid by the word; but this was one of the worst days of your life, and you were having conflicting emotions about your boyfriend.

So, naturally, the bowls fell from your hands, and you collapsed onto the floor.

It was Yelena and Bucky who immediately rushed to you.

“Oh god, are you okay?” Yelena asked, brushing your hair out of your face.

The only thing that escaped your lips were a few sobs, the pain beginning to fester from the old bruises you gained earlier that day. Bucky kneeled in front of you, rubbing your shoulders.

“Can you stand?”

You shook your head but tried anyway, putting all of your weight onto him. Bucky helped you stand, and you leaned on the counter, holding your side with one hand, and the other wiping the oncoming tears.

“I’m sorry.” you sniffled.

Immediately, everyone reassured you that there was nothing wrong. Still, even with the tightness in your throat threatening to spill over, you said.

“I…I was in the city when it happened. I-I don’t know what I saw, I don’t know what Clem saw, she-she hasn’t even talked to me about it-.”

“-How’d you hurt your side?” Bucky gently asked.

You dropped your gaze; the anger from everything that day and in past simmering within you.

“It was just a bad day.”

“How?” He said your name.

Your nostrils flared, and you whispered. “You wanna do this right now? In front of everyone?”

“Okay.” It was John who stood up from the couch. “I think we should be going.”

You shook your head. “No-.”

“-It’s alright.” Alexei intervened. “It’s been a long day, there’s many many family matters to settle, we’ll leave you two alone, eh? I’d love to have a proper dinner whenever. It doesn’t have to be your place, mine is-.”

“-Thank you,” Yelena said your name, smiling and leading Alexei away. The rest of them followed, uttering similar goodbyes. All accept one.

“I’m sorry.”

You furrowed your brow at Bob’s words. It should have been nothing; to anyone else, it was nothing. But not to you. Not at that moment.

“What?” You brushed Bucky away and limped after them into the hallway. “Why are you sorry?”

They all stopped in the hall, Bob at the back. The rest turned to you upon your words, but he didn’t. It was only after a beat of silence that he did.

“I…” he paused. “I’m sorry you got hurt just now-.”

“-No.” You interrupted, approaching him. “No not even that, what do you have to be sorry for? You’re the only one who remembered I had a kid in another room and have been telling everyone to quiet down, what do you have to be sorry for?”

“Honey.” Bucky took your hand, speaking into your hair.

You didn’t even look at him when you dropped his hand; only kept your eyes on Bob. “Well?”

He swallowed thickly, almost as if he was about to cry just from your gaze alone. He opened his mouth. “I was the one-.”

“-Bob.” Yelena shook her head, along with everyone else.

“No, no,” he said before looking back at you. “I was the one to cause all of this. I-I sent everyone in Manhattan down a void of-of darkness, despair. I don’t remember doing it, but I did…I’m sorry. I’m so sorry you and your daughter had to see it.”

You stopped listening after ‘I was the one to cause all of this’. Well, you still did, but just barely; it felt like you were underwater. All you could do in that hallway was stare.

Then, just as the darkness had sunk into your mind, the realization did into your soul. Your heart fell along with your eyes, and your mouth moved but no sound (not even a cry) came out.

When terror settled into your heart, rage quickly followed, and it marked your face. Still, you did not move towards him despite how your shoulders rose and fell with your breathing.

“Mama?”

The familiar, sweet call of your daughter broke through to you.

Snapping your gaze back into your apartment, you saw your daughter stand before you, holding Alpine. Her own eyes were red, and you never saw her so tired.

“Why are you crying?” Her voice quivered.

You brought your hand to your face and felt the tears upon your cheeks. You hadn’t even noticed. If the shame of the entire day hadn’t pulled you under, it was that moment as you cried in front of strangers and your own daughter.

It didn’t feel like you were in your own body as you walked back into your apartment, pushing your daughter behind you and shutting the door just enough for you to keep your head out in the hall.

“It’s not what I saw that made today so horrible,” you stated. “it’s everything that happened after.”

With that, the door shut and was locked. Incessant knocking and the muffled sound of you and your daughter’s name by Bucky (you thought you heard other voices, but the pounding in your head did not help) followed. It wasn’t the first time that day where you no longer had the ability to care.

You dragged yourself into your daughter’s room and collapsed onto her bed. Clementine soon followed, placing Alpine on the pillow next to you. As the cat rubbed his face against yours, Clem cuddled into your side. She kissed your cheek.

“I love you, Mama.”

The damn fully broke and you enveloped her in your arms once more, weeping.

[kanmom51]

Are you sure?! Jeju - Episode 5

And here you have it ladies and gentlemen.

Jikook KNEW they were enlisting together back at the end of September 2023!!!

Let's have a look at the conversation and talk about a couple of things I noticed.

End of September they knew they were enlisting within give or take a couple of months. Not a huge secret, as most of us already concluded by that point, that all 4 remaining members would be enlisting by the end of 2023 (and when I say we I mean the non delusional JK solos that wanted him to do things he himself didn't want to do and that NEVER listened to what JK was telling us throughout the year).

Now the thing that I noticed.

JM is talking about this as a done deal.

One that Tae knew about.

He's not delivering news to Tae, he's just confirming that he knows they are serving together.

And the thing is that from their conversation it appears that they have discussed their decision to enlist together with the other members (not Tae).

From JM:

From JK:

And Tae...

This is obviously the first time they have discussed this with him.

Isn't that a little strange though? Tae hearing about this for the first time here? Not having the same kind of discussion with them about their joint enlistment before Jeju? Before the decision and it being a done deal? (not with his 'husband' nor his 'soulmate')

The feeling I get, and don't come at me for this, is that as much as Tae was trying to show throughout the show just how close he is to JM (not JK), how well he knows him, how much Alone represents him, how much he cares for him, that as it happens, in real life they are most definitley not as close as they used to be. Are they friends? Of course they are. Are they good friends? I do believe they are. Are they super close, involved in each others lives, know about their schedules, music, wants, needs, plans (short and long term)? Involved in those plans or turn to each other for advice regarding said plans? I think that the answer to that one would be an astounding NO. Especially coming from JM's side. I mean, read between the lines. JM didn't even know Tae liked Alone.

It's obvious that Jikook are all that for each other, but that's kind of a given, right? But that supposed closeness that the fandom was always all about between JM and Tae, the 'soulmates' - that is just not there. Sorry not sorry (for bursting some people's dreams and delusions).

It is obvious that the Jikook have discussed their decision to enlist together with Jin and the other older members. It is also obvious that they didn't have that kind of discussion with Tae before making that joint decision.

It is what it is.

(And what exactly does that say about JK and Tae's level of closeness? Will the cult claim that this is also all scripted? So Tae is part of this malicious conspiracy?, questions I will not bother answering, yuck)

And it is obvious that the two had thought this our thoroughly and had dismissed the concerns, knowing each other, knowing how strong they are together, knowing how much they needed (physically and mentally) to not be pulled apart for the 18 months of their military service.

Don't they fight? Well of course they do. But their relationship is so solid that they know how to deal with conflict and overcome it. Not to mention the elephant in the room... yo, Jin, they aren't just friends and you know it, lol. But seriously, even if this was only about a friendship, you can't compare the two of them with everything they have been through together as BTS, as Jikook within BTS, to other good 'normal' friendships.

And perhaps this is it. The reason why they are such a strong loving couple. It's been a while since I've talked about this. Having such a strong friendship as a base to their relationship is what makes the relationship so solid. Falling in love with a close friend, someone you know through and through, for all their good and their bad, seeing them at their best and at their worst and still falling for them... that makes for some shit strong relationship.

Point being, other than knowing just how strong their relationship is, to all the haters out there - you can scream until you are blue in the face, claim they are not together, claim they split up, claim they hate each other, claim they were snatched by aliens, same same, for all intents and purposes - those two are unbreakable. Either get with the program or fuck the hell off.

He knew what he was talking about.

*The translation is just of the first part of the letter.

That was them doing the serious.

And then, as always, they just had to go unserious on us, lol.

But you see, that's exactly how those two are. And that is one of the strengths of their relationship. The level of intimacy they have is off the charts, sticking together through good and bad, coming out on the other side stronger than ever.

To end their discussion we have this:

Yeah, they are 'loving' having to enlist...

NOT!!!

But at least they managed to soften the blow and are doing this together!!!

One last comment before I end this one.

We talked about how it was showing that JK had a weight lifted off his shoulders. He was just lighter. Happier. Even with Tae there, lol. And it was kind of funny to see this, seeing that JK was knee deep into his solo work and just before his promotions for 3D and then Golden. But JK in Jeju was not the same as JK in CT. And now we know why!!