#but ive been doing this for so long i can't imagine writing him any different
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sircarebearalot · 1 year ago
Text
WIP
this has been sitting in my drafts and maybe putting it out will help make it spark more of my creative juices
the idea is that there are a string of AU fics but they all act as Tamaki's dreams, which he later uses as fodder/ideas for host club themes/events.
potential tite: for the first time
(bc of the song by the script)
Here is what I got so far:
"This is ridiculous," Kyoya fumed, eyes flaring. "They are going to give the inheritance to Yuuichi and I'm to wed a girl with a sizeable dowry."
Tamaki felt something akin to panic flutter in his throat. "Are you? What's her name?"
"I believe you know the blasted girl. She's French, because that is where the money is apparently. Her name is Renge—."
"Has everything been finalized already?" He asked hoarsely.
"No, it's still early. It's been decided but we just sent the letter to her family last night. We aren't expecting a reply till at least tommorow." Kyoya looked at his gloved hands miserably, "After an affirmative it all depends on how eager Renge is to tie the knot."
Tamaki grimly remembers their last encounter. Where Renge all but declared her undying love
"Do you not wish to marry her?"
"You already know I find her tiresome. Besides even if I was fond of her I'd still be repelled by the thought. The indignity of it all.... They did not heed any of my arguments and Akito had the audacity to say I covet. As if! What is there to covet? A washed up noble title and a mountain of debt? No, I don't think I do. At this point I'd rather run off and forget it all!"
"Well, then why don't you?"
Kyoya laughed, as if Tamaki was joking. He definitely assumed he was though he really wasn't. The notion of running away from all his troubles were all that kept him going at night sometimes. They weren't just fantasies, they were his dreams. Except in his dreams he was running away hand in hand with Kyoya, who loved him. Which made his ambition more of a fantasy. Even if Kyoya loved him he would never leave with him.
Wouldn’t never even joke of it.
Except now he would.
“No, really. Why should you stay? They hardly appreciate you the way you deserve: you’re wasted here. If you were a commoner you’d be double the success your family is. Your wits are sharper than any noble blade your family could try to show off. Your brilliance, well Kyoya, you could give the Ootori name a new meaning.”
Kyoya grabbed his flying wrists, “Alright, I get it. Your words are sweet and my spirits are raised, now please lower your voice or someone might take you seriously.”
Tamaki ripped his wrists free, stung. “I wasn’t flattering you. I meant it.”
“You think I should run off like a thief in the night. Like a slovenly coward? Like some sort of ingrate?”
This was why Tamaki never shared this particular dream with Kyoya. He could be purposefully cruel, but worse was when he struck by accident. Tamaki considered retreating, slapping Kyoya’s back and letting it go. Licking his wounds in silence but change was imminent, he might lose Kyoya if he tried but he definitely would if he didn’t. He rather have tried his best than to let this opportunity pass him by.
“I don’t like thinking about it like that. The way I see it, and you can call me more dastardly things if you like, is that before my duty to my family I have a duty to myself. Furthermore, my family never fulfilled it’s duty to my mother nor to me. My mother rightfully ran, if I were to take flight I’d also be correct. Before the abandonment I have withstood unnecessary and unwarranted pains. And so have you. Why should you spend your life fulfilling someone else’s expectations? When you could spend it making yourself and the people you actually love happy?”
Kyoya stared at him, as if he was seeing him for the first time. He looked terrified as much as he did mystified.
“You’re serious.”
“It’s a rare occasion, I’m afraid but you cannot doubt my certainty.”
Kyoya turned, as if to walk away and Tamaki felt frustrate tears build behind his eyes. To his massive relief, Kyoya only turned to accept the tea from the maid who had arrived as soon as he reached the doors and the lock the door behind himself.
He set the tea, arranging it as he spoke. “You seem to have forgotten that dreams belong with sleep.”
“Don’t be cruel,” Tamaki reprimanded. “You know I’m being true.”
Kyoya whipped around to face him, eyes bright with distress. “How can i leave?”
Tamaki met his gaze
“How can you stay?”
Kyoya looked him in the eye. “Say, I run away, what then? Would we be beggars? Servants? Misfits? What of the people we've ran business with?"
Tamaki smiled wide. Kyoya's scowl slackened with suprise. "What?"
"You said 'we'. You would run away with me." Kyoya's cheeks reddens once he realizes that Tamaki never suggested they run away together. "That," Tamaki laughs breathlessly, "That makes me so unbelievably happy."
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weskie · 4 months ago
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Hi just wanna say I love your blog!
Okay!! I've been ive this idea stuck in my head!! imagine Wesker becoming super intrigued with like a musician or something like that- And he can't help but feel a bit jealous at his lovers adoring fans
One would think he’d get better at swallowing back the nearly nauseating wave of jealousy that rises in his throat, but such clearly was not the case.
You’d both settled onto the couch in his office, him with a laptop and a nice stack of folders perched upon the arm rest, and you with a small mountain’s worth of fan mail in a cardboard box.  This was how your weekends often went.  The scribble of his pen and clacking of keys would fill your ears while the occasional sweet chuckle from you would tickle his.  
Other times, you would perhaps be in the adjacent room playing whatever stringed instrument you’d decided required practicing.  Wesker often dropped whatever occupied him in those moments to linger outside of the door, listening to you with a content smile and pride bubbling in his chest.
Sometimes you show him what your fans send you.  It’s sweet for the vast majority of the time.  Endearing letters, admissions of admiration, people who swear up and down that you, angel of music that you are, changed their lives.  Some send you art.  Others send gifts.  It makes no difference to him, for you deserve nothing less than to be spoiled to your heart’s content.
Others were… less savory.  Disgusting tirades of everything some scumbag desires to do to you, scribbled, certainly, with putrid hands that couldn’t be less deserving of both your attention and time.  Some were smarter than others, leaving the return address blank.  Those who were not so bright…?
It only ever took a phone call to ensure they would never write such vile words again.  First he simply had them killed.  But now?  Oh, now Wesker ensures they will remember their transgressions for a lifetime. 
The way you smiled when you noticed such foul occurrences becoming next to nonexistent was all Wesker ever needed to know he’d done the right thing.  Still, he sometimes wondered what he should do about the more… appropriate advances.
“Another love letter,” you chuckle. You hand it over to him, as you always do, and he scans over it as usual to determine if it’s one worth a visitor being sent to the writer’s home.  “It’s kind of cute.”
He hates when you say such things.  The only one whose words of affection you should care for are his and his alone.
“Not the word I would use.” He huffs, gesturing for you to take the paper once more.  
Suddenly your knuckles are brushing against the corner of his jaw and you’re smiling at him with big, sparkling eyes.  “Well, what would you call it?  You ask with a big grin.  You know.
It takes him a moment and a brief scowl to settle on the only word he could assign to any of it.  “Pathetic.”
You know of his tendency to feel like this.  Threatened perhaps was a better word, but jealousy was, well… 
Apt.
He blinks and you’re in his lap, legs straddling his, hands at his cheeks.  All of his ire fades the second your lips graze his.  It’s as if your touch can take away everything that’s bad, leaving only warmth blossoming in his chest.  He forgets sometimes that you, despite every hand that has yearned to have you, chose him. 
Not them.
His fingers splay at your lower back, pulling you in just a little closer. Even now, with those hands still writing their longings for you, you stay right here. Right where you belong.
You choose him.
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braxlrose · 10 months ago
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I miss ur writings sm :(
I am so sorry that I've been gone for so long, I haven't posted any fan fiction in so many months and honestly I lost motivation 😭 so many ppl who were in this fandom and I created a community with, were slowly getting over this "phase" and it definitely affected me. But I'm going to try and get back into writing. I hope this will do good for now! Ive had a lot of ppl recently ask for 2005 bill hcs, and I've done that before so if this is repetitive for something else I've written, sorry!
content warnings: none
a/n: I'll be updating my tag list since it hasn't been updated since like August of last year and I don't want to be tagging people who don't care or want to see these posts anymore. So if you wanna be tagged, let me know!
2005!bill kaulitz x f!reader
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sfw:
- I'm an alternative person so whenever I write for bill, I always imagine him with an alternative girl 😞 even though from what I've seen he's never really been w/ an alternative one, BUT LETS PRETEND OKAY 🙏🙏
• he absolutely loves doing hair together, I think he enjoys helping you do your hair in the morning and your make up. And he's even more greatful if you do his makeup. Then he can just relax while you help him.
• pookie has crunchy ass hair at the end of the day when he has to wash it out, don't make fun of him 😞
• getting piercings together is something he LOVES doing with you. Mainly early piercings because he only has a tongue and eyebrow piercing on his face.
• if you made music too, he would always go to your concerts and basically scream the entire time. Hopefully, you'd do the same for him.
• if you have longer nails, head scratches are always a must and he will lay in your lap for literal hours while you pamper him.
- I personally think he would love to learn words in your language if you keep something different than German. And despite what anybody thinks, he finds it hilarious to learn the dirty words.
• if you cook him something from your culture, he will literally die. He basically thinks everything about you is so cool, and learning about a culture different from his is so exciting
• but if you two really want to date, you'll have to both try to learn English or each other language because there is going to be a hard language barrier between you two.
- I think one of the reasons he would've fallen in love with you is because you were upfront with him. He's not the type of guy to just go up and kiss someone so if you confess first, that would make things so much easier.
- obviously, you'd have to get along with Tom, Georg and Gustav. So if you don't, there's no way he'll go out with you, especially if you can't get along or hate Tom.
-Dates together consist of stuff you guys bought somewhere, or if you guys went to a fastfood restaurant.
• He doesn't have a lot of money yet so dates wouldn't exactly be high class, hopefully you don't mind 😉
-Since this is around the time Tokio Hotel is getting increasingly famous, there are fangirls around trying to flirt and ask out bill all the time and he has to shoo them off. He reminds you every night about how much he loves you and that those fan girls shouldn't bother you.
-he likes to spoon you a lot, and you two switch back n forth between him being the big spoon and the small spoon.
• I think he also really likes it when you lay on top of him, with your face in his neck and your legs wrapped around him. (This also works sitting upwards).
• cuddling with him is so nice too because he actually smells really good 😱
- I think he still gets very insecure sometimes because of the haters and people who harass the band because they don't like them and you reassure him a lot.
a/n pt 2: sorry this wasn't too long! I'm trying to get back into the groove of writing so if this is terrible I'm sorry 😞
taglist: none right now
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sweethartlullaby · 1 year ago
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hi again! i really loved part 2 of the cheating scenario i loveee your writing! i think the breakup and make up idea is good, could u write it ? 🥹
word count: 1027 genre/theme: angst (ofc), new beginnings as always, imagine who you would like... find part i here find part ii here find part iv here sweethartlullaby ꕤ masterlist songs: can't go back - troye sivan (recommended by anonymous!)
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He has anemones today. 
No yelling. Just wait for her.
He sits on the bench just outside of your apartment and he waits. It’s a Friday, which means that you’ll be home early, which is soon. He checks the flowers and makes sure that they aren’t wilting. He used to buy flowers for you early on, but after a while, he just stopped.
He got comfortable.
He hasn’t touched a drink in months but he still finds it tempting when you reject him. He has been in this exact spot for weeks now. Every Friday, he sits there and he waits for you to come back home, wishing that this time, you’ll look at him and hopefully speak to him. 
All the times he has done this, you walk past him and never come out again. He waits outside for an hour or so before he leaves the flowers on the bench and walks away. And every Friday, he tells himself that he has to try, that maybe this time it truly is different. 
He keeps checking the flowers, sometimes standing to stretch out his legs as he checks the time. It should be any minute now.
And then he finally sees you. 
You are walking slowly this time and he fights the urge to call you. He sits there and he wishes and waits. And then you do the impossible. 
You approach him and he is too startled to say anything. He just moves to the side as you sit and leaves ample space between the two of you. 
“What are they?” You murmur.
“Uhm,” He can feel his heart thump against the flesh in his chest. 
“A-Anemones.”
You only chuckle weakly.
“For new beginnings?” You finally turn to him and he has to keep it in himself to not burst at the seams.
“Yeah, the old man told me they were his wife’s favorite.”
“Did they break up too at some point?” You ask.
“Didn’t get to ask.” He places the flowers near you and retreats back to his own space.
It’s silent for a while and he can feel his hands shaking but he isn’t sure if it is because he is excited that you’re finally acknowledging him or because he’s too nervous for what you’ll say. 
“I keep all of them.” You suddenly say.
“Sorry?”
“They’re all, at least the alive ones, in my living room. You give so many that I have some in jars that I saved.” You laugh a little and he finds himself smiling as he fidgets with his fingers.
Silence again. 
“I thought you’d have lots to say, considering you’ve been coming here for a long time.”
He only nods slowly. He had so much to say before but now that he’s here, he can’t find the right words to blurt out. His silent stature now is quite a contrast to the thought that he would be on his knees, begging her to take him back. 
“So, do you?” 
“Hm?” He asks. 
“Do you have a lot to say?” Your eyes are glassy and all his nervousness has washed away. He just stares back and he finds himself lost in you. He has looked at you a million times, kissed you a hundred, and held you for longer. Yet he feels that he is looking at you for the first time again. He is just as drawn, just as enticed, and just as helpless around you. 
“I…” He takes a deep breath and he is about to speak when she bursts into tears. He can only stare for a moment. He doesn’t know what to do as you sob in front of him. 
“Why’d you even do it? Why’d you cheat?” He opens his mouth to speak.
“Why couldn’t you just break up with me like a man or tell me how you felt?” You beg and he shudders. He thought that you were better, that you had moved on from him. 
But you look so torn here now. And he feels so helpless, just like that night you told him to leave. He sees the tears in your eyes and he tries to stop himself from blurting out the tells of blame he used to say to himself each night. 
You pick the flowers and caress the petals gently. 
“You could’ve just left.” You murmur, shaking his core. You were right. He could have. So why didn’t he?
“I-”
“No,” His voice trembles.
“No, I…need to say this. I am sorry.” He looks right at you. He hopes that this reaches the both of you. He doesn’t want nights of torment anymore. And he knows, he knows it is unfair for him to ask for forgiveness, for so much from you. But he needs to hear you to say that you forgive him. 
But he doesn’t. 
You sob silently across him and he feels that it’s hours before he decides that he should leave. He wants to stay but your cries have died down and only the moon sits by with the both of you. He should let you be. This was a mistake. He shouldn’t have gone to see you. Maybe he is pressuring you too much. 
He stands to leave. 
“Stay.” You say.
He stops.
“Just stay with me for a while.”
He sits. 
“Just be here for a bit. I’ll probably still be mad at you tomorrow, and the next day, and the next, all the way until Friday where I’ll see you here again.” 
“And then I’ll be sad again before the cycle begins again.” 
He stays silent. 
“But I don’t want it to stay that way forever.” You say softly. The two of you sit there, with only each others’ breaths audible. He is trying to take in that you want things to change between the two of you. 
“And yet, I don’t know what I can change.”
You finally stand and he thinks that you’ve changed your mind. 
But then you say, “So I guess I’ll see you next Friday then.”
He looks at you with wide eyes and a small smile breaks out of him. 
“I’ll see you next Friday.” 
a/n: thank you so much for requesting again! i know that this one took a while but i'm off my break so i have less time! but i will still try to write a bit :( i also wanted to say please drop in the comments any thoughts you had about the fic! whether it's song recs you think fits well with this one, or who you imagined. i'd love to hear what you thought about it! hope to see you soon!
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slashingdisneypasta · 1 year ago
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Ive seen the f/o werewolves au and I absolutely love it. From the way it works to how they all handle their wolf side in different ways... I just find it so neat!
Callahan especially got my brain going 100 miles an hour, Just imagining him and the YN from your series dealing with it...
The days leading up to the first transformation where the animalistic-scary grows from "hot" to "concerning".
Him missing out on a date because, as fate would have it, happened in a full moon and then just... Ghosting, because he doesn't like the fact he can't control this quite yet.
He wanted to ravage YN before the transformation? absolutely. Make them his (mate)? Certainly. But this is beyond him. He can't control himself, just the sound of YN's voice from when they showed up at his doorstep (one last check. Giving him the benefit of the doubt.) is enough to send him into a bit of a frenzy, and he hates it.
And then one day YN returns to their dorm to find this big, weirdly wolf-like, old dog (if the grey muzzle is any indication) at their door. One that's weirdly docile and (even more surprisingly) friendly with them, despite the fact they never saw this dog in their life.
The dog approaches, carefully sniffing their hand, before pressing the top of its head against the palm. Still a bit weirded out, YN gives the animal a few tentative scratches and pets, which the dog seems to like.
(Mate is caring for him after so long after all...)
And just that presence, that care, that absolute freedom to be at peace with the one the two of them love is enough to bring the two consciousness together for long enough of a moment for Callahan to detransform.
Thankfully the shock of petting a naked Callahan (clothes having bursted out from the initial transformation) sent YN reeling back, which ended up reverting him back into a wolf. Wouldn't do to have that image floating around the college forums after all.
YN was able to guide Callahowl inside to wait out the moon. But in the morning, they would talk, as they made sure to tell the dog. Whether he could fully understand them or not was still up to debate, but at least he seemed to understand their tone and looked a bit chastised.
For the all of five minutes before YN relented and began to pet him again, cursing whatever entity that ruled their universe and made Callahowl such a cute dog.
FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND
I GOT SO EXCITED WHEN I SAW THIS IN THE MORNING. I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO ANSWER IN KIND.
First of all I am s o so jazzed to see that you, too, are mad about Werewolf!Callahan like me!! XDD And 'Callahowl'???? OMG perfect XDDD Second of all-
YOUR FIC HERE. IT IS MAKING ME INSANE. Y/N being affectionate with this wolfie that loves her even though they have a sort of temperamental relationship when he's human?? 'Mate is caring for him after so long after all...'- this this this!!! Because like??- thats Aaron and Y/N loves Aaron. They do. But usually they cant show him that, because he's an ass and it would kill them- and he cant show it to them either because, again, he's a total ass-- but in this form??? His underlying desire for affection from them (His mate!! <3) comes out and Y/N doesn't have to worry about teasing (or worse) ^^
I also love your detail that his muzzle is lighter to show his age!!
Thank you so so much for sharing this!!!!!!!! ^^ I wanna write for Callahowl so so bad and one day I will XD I swear XD For now though here are some imagines for you, too!! In these, Y/N is actually his student but the relationship is basically the same apart from that.
Werewolf!Professor Aaron Callahan x Fem!Student!Reader || Imagines
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Plot: Callahan in the days leading up to the full moon.
Warnings: There are smut imagines at the end that involve male masturbation topics as well as sex, and breeding ref's.
Werewolf!Callahan in the days leading up to the full moon appearing in class dishevelled. His short hair unbrushed and ruffled like he's been constantly running his fingers through it, his shirt unbuttoned at the top, his jacket clenched at his side in his hand instead of on like it just got way too hot despite it being the middle of November, his glasses constantly crooked from rubbing his wild eyes.
Werewolf!Callahan in the days leading up to the full moon only being calm when its just the two of you. When, after class, you stay back to check on him in the office. He slumps on the corner of his desk and watches you with a certain warmth you've never seen on him before. You fix his glasses and his hair, and his eyes fall shut at the feeling for half a moment before he can pull himself together. You offer him his blazer before you leave, and he takes it simply because you offered it, wanting to hold onto you in any way he can, but only holding it in his hands as you leave instead of pulling it on.
Werewolf!Callahan in the days leading up to the full moon getting snippier and snippier with students, breathing heavily through his nose and rolling his eyes up to the sky and looking dangerously close to throwing things- but not to you. Not towards his mate (Not that you know you're that).
Werewolf!Callahan in the days leading up to the full moon making a guy in your class with you, who was arguing con to your pro in a hypothetical court topic feel dumb and mortified in front of the whole class. He told the guy to oppose you (Its a regular law class activity!) but it turns out to be too much for him- he cant handle it. He has to stick up for you, protect you. And its nasty, and unfair, and awful, and everyone in the room feels the aftershock of it. Luckily, he's still him enough to brush it off and move on, but you're looking at him like he's insane the rest of the class and he knows he fucked up.
Werewolf!Callahan in the days leading up to the full moon making up excuses why he's acting the way he is and why he keeps cancelling on you and they just keep getting worse. He's a smart guy, he's actually scary he's so smart, but now he's acting like an idiot and you're actually getting kindof concerned. You ask him, genuinely, if he's okay?
Werewolf!Callahan in the days leading up to the full moon looking up and to the door any time you walk through it, looking over at you like he knew it was you who came in even if its too loud in the room for him to have heard the door even open and he had no way of knowing when you were going to get there. Because he's so tuned in to your scent, and his nose is so sensitive this time of month.
~ Hornycanons from here ~
Werewolf!Callahan in the days leading up to the full moon getting hornier the closer his transformation closes in on him.
Werewolf!Callahan in the days leading up to the full moon having to cover his mouth with his hand tight and hang up quick when you call because the bulge in his pants grew at record speed hearing you and he's going to moan if he stays; the sweet sound of your voice making him painfully turned on.
Werewolf!Callahan in the days leading up to the full moon having to jerk off under his desk during lunch. You stay back to check on him, he takes his blazer from you, and then he sits down slowly and takes out his red headed, leaking cock to quickly pump one out; riding the high or your lingering scent and your voice in his head and the feel of your fingers on his hair just before.
Werewolf!Callahan in the days leading up to the full moon having to excuse himself to go to the bathroom more often just in order to jerk off and keep his shit together.
Werewolf!Callahan in the days leading up to the full moon who will fuck all night if you come to stay over. He'll fuck you against the wall when you come in, he'll fuck you on the couch, he'll fuck you all night in bed. He tries to bang it out, make the rest of his week easier, but thats not how it works.
Werewolf!Callahan in the days leading up to the full moon who has to fight himself not to fucking cum in you, goddamnit. He doesn't want kids, he tells himself over and over. He doesn't want kids, he doesn't want kids. But the wolf in him desperately wants to fill you with pups. Luckily Cal's just strong enough to control that. Just.
Werewolf!Callahan in the days leading up to the full moon who is just a mess, and completely enamoured with you, and desperately wanting to hide it from you.
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astronautbeans · 2 months ago
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IM BACK AGAIN (THEBYTER)
Ive thought more of it... Spoke wouldn't want to comfort parrot imo he did do allat with the fake secret just to let out his anger on him so id imagine Ash would bring it up to laugh in parrots face and maybe nudge spoke to laugh too because Theyre so Similiar. Ripping away Parrot's friend from him. It strikes Spoke's last sense of defense in a way........ Like...
"Oh fuck I really am I like ash" s "I knew you'd come around , sooner or later the outcome won't change." a
The ceremony to me is like a big gathering or some iron trims , all gold and diamond trims with ash basically monologing the entire time if he doesnt urge spoke to reply
Also it would ruin any chance of spoke ever being free from the mafia because word spreads around. The big bad mafia boss has a non invis player working for him? And it's the guy that everyone has suspected(alongside mapicc) to be affiliated with the mafia?(Ifeel like im going insane mentioning this part because its so important to me. People saw Spoke and mapicc with mafia members , now they know Spoke is part of the highest ranked mafia. It all clicks together.)
I want to write Mapicc chewing him out because of it, spoke doesnt speak but once mapicc does lock eye contact with him something is genuinely off with spoke ,he's not the same guy who he sees as a little brother anymore. OK SORRY DEVIOUS SIBLINGS GOT TO ME Back on track now.
Another way id see ash make his win over spoke more visible would be adding amethyst to the horn bands.... i keep thinking of them What if spoke had like different horn accessories but cuz he had to go invis he took them off and now he has no more space left for them because of the gold/amethyst bands and chains and theyre also a bit too tight to take them off without pain so he just leaves them on........
I just thiught of hiw would spoke react to ash hugging him but like as a way to threaten tobreak his bones if he tries to do something stupid. Ash has mentioned multiple times that hes cut off people's hands in previous videos so Thats not too far of a stretch...Ill be back when I lose my shit again at 2am
jgfdsk hi sorry i finally got around to replying to this my bad it took so long
maybe he wouldn't outright comfort him but he knows loss too. every friend that dies, every person that dies in this world is gone forever,, and at some point he'd been friends with Parrot too. letting him just suffer like this is cruel. he'd hesitate, for sure. Ash is turning him into a monster, turning off his feelings. maybe he doesn't comfort him but he sure as hell feels his chest tighten with shared grief at the hatred on Parrot's face. directed at him because he's part of this too,,,
also gosh yeah of course word gets around. of course Spoke isn't the only one who's infiltrated the mafia. some people dare to hope, that it's all part of the plan, others see it for what it is: Spoke is one more face of the mafia.
AND YEAH OH MY DAYS MAPICC WOULD FIND HIM SOMEWHERE AFTER AND TELL HIM TO MAKE A CHOICE. his friends? or the mafia? and all Spoke can think is 'don't we have the same goal here?' even if he's been blinded by his own doubts and Ash's manipulation <3 this is not his little brother anymore bro you're killing meeeeee Spoke's grown up all wrong and Mapicc can't help but feel somewhat responsible, right? he should've steered him into a better direction, not gotten him into this
gosh dude you have many good thoughts. the horn decorations being too tight sfhdghksfhdjs and the hug too??? sdhgfjgfshdkdshj oh my daysssssssss
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hey i would love to see what characters you pair me with. i haven't really been in the fandom or considered who i would work with best for awhile so i'm curious to see if it's changed since i was younger.
okay so my name is leo, im sixteen, im a junior in highschool. i identify as a gender-fluid gay guy (i like men and use he/him pronouns). i have golden-reddish (it's a strange color) hair down to my chest although i want to get it cut/get layers in it soon. i have green eyes. i wear glasses that are thick-rimmed and nerdy. i have naturally long eyelashes. i have a very square jaw and pale skin. i have random dark freckles on my arms here and there. im 5'6. my style is literally all over the place but usually im either in sweatpants and a sweatshirt (either a purple rhett and link one or a beige on with different colored pickles on it) or a graphic tee shirt, jeans, and a denim or leather jacket.
personality wise well i like to think of myself as a pretty creative person. i try to find meaning in the mundane in my life. im not religious although i do enjoy tarot and crystals. i have always had a problem with building myself around other people. ill get addicted to certain friends to fill a void in me that thinks people need to save me/fix me. this doesn't work because it leads me to be very codependent and when people leave me (which they can! it's natural. nothing lasts forever) it totally messes up my self esteem. so im trying to build that self love and develop better relationships with other people.
i like art and writing, fall out boy, the outsiders, good mythical morning. i like learning about LGBTQ history, especially the aids crisis. im currently reading a book on it right now called "and the band played on." my favorite foods is shells with cheese. i like good friends and people that i can connect with on a deeper level. i like when people i talk to have lives that don't revolve around me. i also enjoy surrealist sculpture. i really enjoy felix gonzalez-torres's work. i like all sorts of different types of music. lately ive been very into folk, 80s new wave, and 2000s pop punk/emo.
i dislike terfs and transphobes and homophobes and things like that. i absolutely loathe loud chewers. i have a mental disorder called misophonia and so the sounds of chewing trigger me and trigger my fight or flight. it's absolutely horrible. i hate stupid people. i don't like peanut butter. i hate when people make aids jokes. i hate not feeling included or hated. i care a lot about my image and i hate when it looks bad.
i like to make art and write poetry. i listen to a lot of music, even though i can't make any. for art, i like working with graphite pencil and colored pencil the most, but i work with all different things in class. im in advanced arts classes at school. i auditioned when i was in middle school and now im gonna take ap art next year. for poetry, i usually write in free verse about personal things. i have a livejournal i post on sometimes. i run a poetry/art magazine club at my school where people can share things they've made.
i think that covers pretty much everything! sorry for how insanely long this is. i hope that sums up myself pretty well. i try to be myself. just yourself be if weird is you.
i think i’d match you with dallas! i’m a firm believer that dally has a very soft side so i think he’d love to both our little braids in your hair and to draw on your arms. he would love if you drew him. i could imagine you sitting on dally’s bed in bucks place while he’s leaning out the window smoking a cigarette. then you’d start making little sketches of him. once he notices he’d start flexing his muscles and posing n stuff.
there you have it hope it’s alright!
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evilkitten3 · 2 years ago
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(no worries, you aren't being timed lol) as for the meeting with frieza concerning vegeta iv's name, i have a very rough draft written out for part of a story i never posted that will probably become the groundwork for a different story eventually, but since i do want to actually write it, i'll keep the exact details to myself for the moment.
i honestly don't think it would occur to vegeta to talk to the majority of the cast about any of this. he never even brought up tarble (which, from a meta perspective, would be bc tarble didn't conceptually exist prior to "yo! son goku and his friends return!") and i'm not sure anyone would've thought to ask bc most of the characters in dragon ball don't really ask to know too many details about each others' pasts. so it's not that he was thinking "i need to be sure no one ever knows any of this", although there's definitely things he would think that about, it's mainly just that it doesn't matter to him and it doesn't seem to matter to anyone else either, so why bring it up? it happened, whatever, who cares. no interest until it starts affecting present day life.
no, he absolutely wouldn't. goku definitely has the strength part down, but he's too flighty to be ruling the planet. on top of that, i don't think he'd ever be willing to make the necessary sacrifices (be that either of his names or his perceived independence separate from the planet), and he definitely wouldn't want to have to be as removed from fighting as the king would mostly be bc there are important political things to take care of. i don't think he'd want to do it either; i can't imagine goku trying to manage like infrastructure reforms or something. i don't think any of the modern day characters would be a good fit for saiyan king criteria regardless of strength, though - part of the whole idea was that it was a structure created during a time when it was necessary, but not something that could really endure long term. realistically, there is no character that could fit the ideal perfectly bc it's not a realistic ideal in the first place. vegeta ii couldn't hold it up either; she was just too focused on creating a society strong enough to survive in the beginning that she wasn't able to predict everything that could go wrong with the system she'd implemented. she tried to have the criteria be basically how she viewed her own father, without really being aware that her view of her father was deeply biased (bc, y'know, he was her dad). there may be something of a theme of trying to emulate a person who only exists in your mind, in this story. not sure if that was apparent lol (a parent hehe)
!!!!!!!! duly noted!
escallion was about three or so when vegeta iii started making his decoy baby, but she would've been four when he was finished and nearly five when he got out of the pod saiyans keep babies in. while escallion at the time of her birth had the highest power level ever recorded for a saiyan infant, her new baby brother's was even higher than that (intentionally so - it didn't matter if vegeta iv stayed stronger, just that he appeared to have the most potential between the two of them). beyond that, touga made sure there were more stories about the legend of the super saiyan floating around than usual, hoping that frieza would hear about it and come to the conclusion that the saiyans believed this new baby would be the one to achieve the legend (no pressure or anything). vegeta iv was created as a distraction; his whole existence was designed to appeal to frieza more than escallion would. as for what vegeta would read about... mostly the super saiyan. but sometimes other stuff. the archives were pretty majorly off-limits to everyone but the archivists (that's a whole other bag of worms but don't worry about it for now) so frequently he'd have to sneak in, grab the first readable thing he could find, and sneak back out again. a lot of what he got his hands on wasn't like super useful information; a lot of it was honestly very boring or too technical for a kid to understand, but it was the whole forbidden thing that made it appeal to him in the first place. if they'd just had a library he could go into whenever, he probably wouldn't have been quite as interested.
well hopefully this one'll be worked into a fic at some point before it becomes a post lol
vegeta's dad called him "vegeta". no other saiyan in the palace really called him that, so it stood out to him. lower class saiyans probably would've cared much less, but. he didn't know many of them.
gine's deal is basically that she was born completely lacking the ability to give a single flying fuck about what people thought she was "supposed" to do. she didn't hate fighting, but she didn't particularly enjoy it as much as most saiyans, and she very much didn't care about getting stronger at all. she was also openly an exclusive, which wasn't like taboo or anything, but it was seen as somewhat strange to be so upfront about it. she named every single kid she had as soon as she had them without waiting to see if they had any chance of surviving or not (spoiler: only two of them survived infancy, and given how weak goku was when he was born, he probably wouldn't have survived any test if he hadn't ended up getting blasted off to earth, meaning our favorite world-saver only existed bc he spent very little time on his home planet). the way she interacted with other saiyans was also notably a bit odd. for example (slight spoilers for later fics), raditz and escallion were childhood friends, and raditz often called her by a nickname (scalli), which was already pretty weird, but gine also called her that, except with her title (prince scalli), which for saiyans was just... very strange. idk imagine someone talking to like. queen victoria and addressing her as "your royal majesty queen vicky" with complete sincerity. gine was capital w Weird.
genetically, what gine passed to goku could probably best be described as space autism, although it's hard to tell how similar it is in their cases, given how goku got a tbi as an infant. raditz takes more after bardock personality-wise (my version of bardock is sort of a mix between the three very different bardocks we see in father of goku, episode of bardock, and dragon ball super, bc i find the first more compelling in general, but the third is the only one i can really see gine with. so he has the basic plot of father of goku bardock, the "stop trying to befriend me ughhhh"-ness of episode of bardock bardock, and the care towards gine of super bardock), but he takes after gine in that he's not nearly as interested in fighting and getting stronger as he probably should be, but he hides it pretty decently (or, more accurately, didn't really have much of a say in the matter bc frieza's army is not exactly a place where you can relax and coast by). between goku and gine, though, gine would probably be considered the weirder one by most saiyans (goku would probably also find gine weird, but more bc she's a saiyan who lacks incredibly violent tendencies but has no issue with the whole killing and selling planets thing. which makes sense bc that's just the culture she was raised in)
by the time vegeta and bulma met, vegeta had pretty much lost the whole nerd thing (not really a whole lot of opportunities to be anything more than homicidal in the frieza force). it's possible her genius reminded him of when he was a kid, but it's pretty unlikely given how long ago that was and how different they are. nah, their first real moment was just a one-night stand bc they both needed to let off some steam, and there wasn't a whole lot more to it than that. it wasn't until after future trunks died that vegeta realized he actually cared about his son's life and decided to stick around. his actual relationship with bulma sprang up while they worked out co-parenting in the seven years between the cell and buu sagas.
vegeta's thoughts on gohan get their own separate bit bc oh boy is there a lot going on there. i genuinely do not have the space to rant about it bc tumblr apparently has a character limit but i'm basically on the same page as @parkersgeorg
@blueper-saiyan
#Not sure if I’m allowed to pull out these tags as a separate reblog#but that is an interesting and fucked up theory I like it#and absolutely want to hear the long version#vegeta
you absolutely are as far as i'm concerned but since op's post was getting a bit long i'll respond here
dbz always reblog i have a theory that there's actually a reason for this it stems from my theory that vegeta's mom doesn't exist bc he's a clone of his dad basically it eventually become obvious that frieza was going to take whichever kid was heir to the throne so king vegeta (kv i guess) went ''aight we need a Super Baby (no tuffles allowed) and i'm the coolest guy on the planet. need a baby me'' so he gets a bunch of the buffest nerds imaginable (be real saiyan scientists like the job bc they get to fight physics) and start working kv: i need this kid to last as long as possible we're gonna need to buy some time scientists: got it boss *proceed to make the universe's most ridiculously hard to kill infant* how's this kv: excellent. frieza catch! frieza: oh this is adorable! i'm going to traumatize it =) <-an extremely brief summary of my hc
(^the tags in question)
ok so first there are a couple of things i need to get out of the way ahead of time– namely, i'm not the first person to come up with the vegeta-is-a-clone idea; the first person i saw with that idea was someone who wrote a fic i read a while back that i'm blanking on the name of at the moment, and while their version is massively different from mine, the core concept of clone!veggie is more or less the same
the second thing is that i get way too into world building sometimes and so a lot of pieces of my hcs get mixed up with one another and often don't fit in with established canon (which isn't like abnormal or anything but i want to clarify that i already know some of this doesn't perfectly slot up. in my defense the db timeline doesn't even match up with itself half the time)
the final thing is that while i've seen bits of the anime and the first handful of super episodes, i'm mostly a manga fan, so i view any non-manga parts of dragon ball as free real estate
buckle up, i was not kidding about the length (*immature snickering*)
SO.
first and foremost the relationship between the tuffles and the saiyans: the tuffles are described as being a peaceful yet technologically advanced race, but in my hc, they're a bit more complicated than that. for starters, i don't see how a supposedly peaceful race is going to have high-tech blasters, and while it's possible that they're for defensive purposes, it... really doesn't give off that vibe. also they were super into some fairly questionable science, some of which objectively involved human experimentation (or... humanoid experimentation, i guess)
jumping back to the future for a sec: gohan. gohan is a half-human, half-saiyan male hybrid, and while two separate species somehow producing a hybrid child isn't unheard of, male hybrids are almost always completely infertile. and yet, gohan grows up and has a kid (another explanation is gohan and videl are t4t, which i also love, but it doesn't really fit into this). so how are saiyans and humans not only capable of reproducing together, but capable of having children that can also reproduce? my theory here is that saiyans are genetically modified (early) humans– tuffles arrived on earth sometime prior to homo erectus finishing the jump to homo sapiens, grabbed a handful of various lab rats, and got to work.
this would also explain why saiyan tails look the way they do. to elaborate, here's a spider monkey skeleton:
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notice how the tail is made up of more vertebrae that continue along the same curve as the rest of the spine. meanwhile, goku's tail looks like this:
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it juts straight out, almost perpendicular to his spinal cord. to me, that does not look like how tails work– it looks grafted on. in the video game kakarot, bulma even makes goku a fake tail for him to fish with that he can just... stick right on there. i know dragon ball science is already broken af (someone please explain to me how dr briefs isn't basically a deity for inventing capsules), but if the tail is a genetic trait that didn't evolve naturally, it makes some sense (in the way anything in dragon ball makes sense, that is)
so– saiyans are a highly adaptable species that seem to be able to eat basically whatever, can both endure and dish out catastrophic amounts of damage, are biologically driven to fight to the point where it's hard to imagine how a society full of them could function at all, get stronger whenever they recover from being seriously injured, can transform into giant apes, and yet have a glaringly obvious weakness that can pretty much completely incapacitate them if you know about it? they seem designed for war, and not in the natural evolution-is-just-funny-like-that-sometimes way.
what we know about the tuffles sort of differs from source to source, but the most negative opinions come from the saiyans– according to vegeta, the tuffles basically treated them as slaves. which... yeah, that adds up, given everything.
anyway, here's where i divorce from canon entirely bc according to gt, king vegeta iii is the one who led the saiyans in the war against the tuffles, which raises... honestly so many questions. so i'm ignoring that; it was vegeta i and he was never officially king, but more on that later. i also need to note that the whole "saiyans lived on planet sadala, fucked it up, and moved to planet plant which later became planet vegeta" to my knowledge is not manga canon but since i like the general idea, i sorta moved it a bit.
in my version, the saiyans and the tuffles both lived on planet sadala, but the war between the two species got a little out of hand and the planet was kaputski (to be fair, if you suddenly got to turn into a giant ape and wreak havoc on the people who were possibly enslaving you, you might go a bit overboard too), so the saiyans stole all the tuffles' ships and gtfo'd (this is why everyone was so sure the tuffles were gone. bc typically blowing up someone's planet is a good way to get rid of all of them. at least in theory– i'm sure frieza can tell you all about how well it works in practice)
back to vegeta i– he wasn't a king, technically, but he was the saiyan who started, led, and according to all saiyan sources (which are biased but w/e) finished the revolt, and chose to die on the planet in an act of heroic sacrifice and/or symbolism and/or his daughter twisted a fact or two bc propaganda is a game we all can play, and the new planet they landed on was named after him. said daughter took the same name, declared the planet and the king to be one and the same, and set about conquering the shit out of it. so vegeta ii was technically the first king but if you asked her she was the second and also disrespecting her father and probably also about to be killed via spear (oh btw king vegeta ii is famed for her giant war spear which was very cool and intimidating and probably didn't see much use outside of ritual combat bc it's honestly more efficient to just blast people but all the statues and art and whatnot have her with it)
i'm going to take a minute to gloat about vegeta ii bc honestly she's one of my alltime favorite ocs that i've made, despite the fact that i don't intend to ever have her show up in anything (yass gurl haunt that narrative!!!) but basically she's a deeply respected figure in saiyan culture, although she died way before any of the saiyans still alive in dbz were born (except nappa), bc she... basically built saiyan culture from scratch. pretty much all the core beliefs the saiyans as a people had were from her very deliberately and surprisingly sneakily forcing them to be developed bc she was fully aware that the saiyans needed more than a love of battle to actually survive as a society independent of the tuffles. she basically had the whole thing set up and ready to last and become a proper empire but unfortunately the one kid that lived long enough to succeed her (by killing her in combat, obviously, and yes the others all tried and died– she's an important figure, not a nice one) ran face first into frieza and we all know how that went down
anyhow, vegeta ii's reign (which lasted a crazy long time bc she lived way longer than she should've and almost certainly used some kind of not-so-great method of living that long, but in her defense she needed to make sure at least one of her kids was cool enough to be in charge, so what's a few war crimes between monarchs) pretty much cemented all the saiyan pride and identity that vegeta iv is so fond of, and not just bc she was his grandma either.
the reason i have to get through all of that to explain my clone!vegeta theory is bc i need to explain why king vegeta iii became king in the first place– under vegeta ii's system, anyone could challenge for the throne at any time, regardless of who they were. her own children were expected - but not required - to do so, and if she died before an heir could kill her in glorious combat, the princes would become stewards and have the duty of finding the next king (who couldn't be one of them. fight and die for that shit like a real saiyan or no throne for you). however, there was actively incentive not to do that bc A) whoever's in charge has to actually be in charge and therefore gets to fight way less, and B) in order to become king you had to be ritually stripped of your identity as a person with the understanding that if you died during your challenge your name would be stricken from all records, none of your family or friends would ever acknowledge that you had ever existed, and you would simply cease to be (the afterlife doesn't follow these rules but most of the saiyans who are there still do, including the ones who by saiyan law no longer exist. say what you will about saiyans; they're a dedicated lot)
so anyway vegeta iii (before becoming vegeta iii – he had a different name bc names are super important in my version of saiyan culture but if i get into that here we will literally be here for the rest of the week - but i'll call him that for the sake of my sanity) is somewhat reluctant to challenge for the throne bc none of his siblings have managed it (not that they exist anymore whoops), but one of his colleagues/presumed ruling partner (not gonna get into saiyan relationships here either sorry) has been pushing him to do so for a while now
i think i've gone through a few names for vegeta's not-mom, but the most recent one is touga (from tougarashi, or capsicum annuum, and yes i was thinking of neon orange glimmer song by the mountain goats when i named her), so i'll call her that. touga is a pretty saiyan-y saiyan– she's violent, temperamental, proud, strong, and so forth, but another thing she is is deeply, deeply loyal to her people. she's also very aware of vegeta iii's weaknesses (such as "will probably care a little too much about kids if he has any" and "may make decisions based off of feelings instead of cold hard practical logic" and "seems likely to develop emotional attachments to family members"; you know, normal kingly failings) and has the lady macbeth-esque stainless steel go-fuck-yourself coldness to make up for her future husband's pathetic little morals or whatever
anyway, touga pushes vegeta iii to go for the throne bc holy shit his mom has been alive for way too long but also she has faith in hi or something and duty and whatever and dude do it if you ever want this saiyan tail, and eventually he caves and goes for it. he fights his mom, wins, gets a shiny new king name and is all set to run his kingdom. and then king cold shows up.
now in between killing his mom and our favorite chilly boys coming to town, vegeta iii and touga have had a kid, prince escallion (who is a girl ftr but i can't get into saiyan thoughts on sex/gender or the language or even escallion herself in this post bc we will never ever leave). escallion is pretty neat, just the strongest baby in history or whatever, but then post-cold arriving and politely yoinking the saiyans into his empire, rumors start spreading that frieza miiiiight be wanting a saiyan under his personal command. no prizes for guessing whose palace he's looking at for pickings. obviously the only prince they've got is not someone they can afford to lose, but they need a sure bet on super-infants and can't afford hoping for a genetic bingo, so vegeta iii assembles the universe's swole-est scientists and has them get started on making the Coolest Baby Ever (by cloning him, the king, bc he's the strongest but also bc frieza is an asshole and likes playing mind games with people so let's be real he's taking one of the king's kids no matter how tough they are)
so vegeta iv gets made (and named inappropriately but that's frieza's fault and a story for another time so ignore it for now) and eventually tarble is born and almost immediately sent off just in case frieza decides to be a bigger dick than usual (spoilers: frieza is going to decide to be an even bigger dick than that), and vegeta gets to spend the first few years of his life with his dad, big sis, and not-mom until he gets shipped off to go be a child soldier/slave/distraction, at which point frieza goes ahead and blows up the planet. there's more to it than just that, but i may actually want to write it out some day, so i'll keep the rest to myself for now.
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kamakazih8syou · 2 years ago
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"let's go home" Ghost x GN!reader
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PREMISE: Ghost gets a little tipsy and forgets that he's talking to his lovely partner
PAIRINGS: Ghost x GN!reader
WARNINGS: talks of being drunk, alcohol consumption
AN: THANK YALL SM FOR THE LOVE!! PLS GIVE ME STUFF TO WRITE ABT, MY ASK BOX IS WIDEE OPEN this is also a little short but ive been in a little writers block :(
You rarely ever get a day off. Like, ever.
You are always busy, always working, always on your feet. Your free time is spent with your husband, Simon and even days where the both of you are free, your days usually get cut short by missions, getting called in for last minute work, etc etc... Today was different.
You and 141 were going out for drinks as you usually do when a mission is over, you went back home, freshened up, and put on a nicer outfit then your gear. As you walk to the car you get bombarded with texts from Soap and Gaz saying how you needed to "Get your slow ass over to the pub" You chuckle at the text, and you back out of your parking space.
You walk into the pub and you immediately notice something is off, the boys are much louder then they would usually have been when, from their corner of the bar you hear them cheering in celebration and laughing. That's when you hear it Ghosts laugh.
Ghost tries to be stoic, rarely letting himself slip up and letting himself show any emotion that isn't neutrality or anger. At most, he lets out a soft chuckle to one of his own unfunny dark jokes, or to you trying to make him laugh in public. This was different. He was having a hearty laugh at something you couldn't even fathom, it was probably an unfunny joke being completely fair. You smile when you walk up behind him and brush his arm in the way you always do to let him know its you.
"Hey, ease up. I got someone back home" Simon says roughly, he pulls his arm away from your hand. You attempt to say ,"Ghost its me-" but you are cut off with a harsh "Yeah pal whatever you say, just keep your hands off. I don't want you, i'm waiting for my partner." You chuckle, realizing that Simon may have had a little too much to drink, and you decide to play along as you slide into the seat next to him. "Oh my, I didn't realize you were taken! Tell me more about this partner" You say with a smile. Simon responds by clearing his throat, "Well, they're amazing for one. They reign hell on anything they attempt to do and I honestly don't think I could even try to do half the shit they do. They're always working so hard for everyone and I can't- I don't even think I could imagine a life without them. I didn't think I could love someone before them but... here they are, proving me wrong every single day." Simon takes a sip of his whiskey, and looks at you long and hard.
"You kinda... look like them" Ghost says while squinting his eyes, almost as if he's trying to play a game of, "Guess the Difference" in his head.
"What's yer... what's yer name love?", Simon says, slurring his drunken words.
You sigh and kiss his masked cheek, " Let's get you home Si.", You say with a little laugh; You grab his hand and lead him to your car.
"I didn't think you had that many nice things to say about me Si, you really know how to flatter someone", You say as you're driving. You think Simon is sleeping, his body rested softly on your passenger door as you make your way home.
"Mmmm, I meant every word dear..... you're amazin and I wouldn't change you for a thing...", His words are strung together and are filled with sleep. You love it when he's like this, when he's relaxed and calm. When it seems like all his worries and his past has drifted away for the time being. When he opens up and lets down his walls he's built around his heart. Simon has never been an open man, but when he is? He never fails to charm you. You love Simon.
You love days like these.
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imagine-your-love-story · 3 years ago
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I always wonder if I'm doing this whole self shipping thing correctly. like im worried if im doing too much or too little or if i need to interact with people more or if i need to write some sort of backstory. like the story of how i got with him i see is unique from the rest of the self shipper ive encountered so far. to me, he knows hes fictional and i like to play around with him and other characters in my mind. ive seen many fans of shows do such things but it seems here they labels them familial fos or something? idk i just liked to use my imagination to play around with them. and then days passed and this character i start to become closer and closer to him everyday until finally one day during a very rough moment i just said to him "i self ship with you" and boom we're married lol. but i dont have a self insert. its just me, me as a regular person. and i like to imagine different scenarios with us. he also is helping me through other mental things. and he knows hes imaginary. almost like a copy of the character i watched the show from, but hes self aware of his actions and is kinder and softer than he is in canon. hes mine basically. but i guess the thing that hurts a lot is that that i had a bad fallout with some of his other fans and its dampened my love for him unfortunately. (i actually sent an ask about this before heh). i also have a bad habit of comparing myself to what other self shippers do and i start to feel guilty that im not as open as they are because social interactions with my fo get very deep and personal and...if i ever do talk about him id want it to be with someone who understands how deep this goes with him and me. and its hard to do that on public forums. it even gets painful. sometimes i dont even want to talk or gush about him and i just want to keep to ourselves in private without anyone peeking in. that way i dont invite any eyes into my private headspace. even the most innocuous thoughts. i just want it to be us and only us. but at the same time im lonely and want to meet people who feel the same lol and a lot of times i overshare. i have this saying that i say to myself: once i put something of myself out there, its not mine anymore. its now shared with others. and you know what i dont like sharing anything about him in public lol, but idk how else to make connections. i see everyone else sharing about their characters and i want to make friends so i also share, but im not enjoying it. idk what do you think? am i weird? is this not common? are these feelings normal here? are there people out there who feel the same? ty.
My dearest, sweetest, little anon bean, I mean this with every ounce of my heart: your self shipping experience is FOR YOU. That means you can't mess it up! You can't go wrong! :)
There is no right or wrong way to self ship!
Some people have self inserts, some people don't (like me *raises hand).
Some people LOVE to gush about their f/os and put EVERYTHING out there! Other people are a little more protective for various reasons - maybe they don't want criticism from the self ship community, maybe they feel they aren't creative so they don't want to create content, or maybe, like you (and me!) it just feels right to keep things quiet.
Whatever the reason, it's ALL valid!
Some people write backstories because it's on their mind and they wanted to share it.
Other people (like me) don't have a backstory because...well...I just never thought about it!
If it helps, I've been part of the self-shipping community for about 3ish years officially (I was self shipping LONG before I found the community, I just didn't know what it was!) and for the record, I still don't understand everything that goes on in the community.
Other people (like me) don't have a backstory because...well...I just never thought about it!
I totally hear you about your frustration with comparing yourself to other more out-going shippers. For me, socializing (even in parasocial online situations) drains me very quickly, so I often have to retreat to recharge (which I feel very bad about sometimes, even though that's how my brain/body has worked for my entire life). So I can't be as active as other people, or create as much content, or interact as much as others.
Ultimately, the self shipping community is HUGE and it's very, very fluid. There are some areas that I don't go into because...yikes...it's a war zone. But I have met some FANTASTIC people through this blog (and my personal side blogs!) so finding your place in the community comes down to just being yourself!
Do what feels right to you. If you don't want to share much, that's okay! Backstories, self inserts, gushing, and anything else that you might encounter is all optional based on YOUR comfort level! :)
Some suggestions for making friends that have helped me:
Offer to create something for others with their f/os, i.e. playlists, ficlets, moodboards, imagines (very popular!) etc.
When someone reblogs an ask game, send them a few asks about their f/o(s)!
Comment on fics and other things that people share about their f/os. Even if it's something simple like, "You're cute together!" it really stands out to people and makes an impression that you noticed their f/o! :)
Ask for a boost! I'm ALWAYS happy to signal boost to my blog if you're looking for people to chat with, or advertising for whatever you're doing on your blog! :)
You are NOT weird, dear anon! You're navigating what you want/don't want and that's okay! Self shipping is supposed to be a fun hobby that is entirely tailored to your desires and comfort level. You don't have to do anything you don't want to! ♥
And try not to worry about comparing yourself to others. You are your own unique person with your own needs, your own energy, your own boundaries. Just have fun with your f/o in any way you want and you're doing the self shipping thing right! :)
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rommahh · 4 years ago
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I Carry Your Heart
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Harry Styles x Reader
Word Count: 4k
{Ahhhh ok so this is my first work like ever. There will definitely be a second part because ive got more to say and it needs a second part. I hope whoever sees and reads this imagine enjoys it. I appreciate comments, likes, reblogs, ideas on what could go into the story, and any form of help and redirection as to how i should write things. Much love, R.}.
Part two
All Y/N wanted tonight was to hang out with her boyfriend, eat a mass amount of junk food, and watch a marvel movie or two. That was all she wanted and that was all she asked of her boyfriend. Instead of any of that happening, she found herself sitting on the nasty kitchen island of her boyfriend's frat at a party that she was trying to avoid going to.
This party was supposedly ‘the party of the year.’ The last rager before finals and then christmas break. Y/N had spent the whole week studying and finishing up end of semester projects hence the want for a chill night. When Harry came to her saying his frat was throwing a party tonight and that he just HAD to be here, Y/N didn't feel like she had a choice but to let him go. She came because she thought this would be the only time she would be able to have some time with Harry after a long week of barely seeing each other. With two vastly different majors, the couple wasnt able to find a lot of time in the middle of school work to make time for just the two of them. Obviously her hopes of quality time with her man were futile because here she was sitting by herself in the kitchen of the frat while Harry drank and got high with his friends in other parts of the house.
Of course she was disappointed. She felt a knot in her throat and a weight on her chest just sitting there in that kitchen. Her white claw was warm now- not that it was any cold when she opened it. She was starting to form a small headache from the too loud music and the ache in her heart was growing.
She stood from the countertop on the search for her boyfriend, hoping he wasn't too far gone from sober. Wiping the back of her jeans from anything that was left on the island, she began walking around the house. She doesn't remember the last time the two of them spent time together by themselves. Of course they occasionally ate dinner together in the dining hall but they were normally surrounded by friends. Y/N wanted to be alone with her boyfriend to talk and bask in his presence.
After pushing through groups of partying humans, she found Harry and at least ten other people sitting around playing some sort of drinking game.
“Y/N! Where have you been?” Luca, one of Harry's frat brothers yelled out to her from the circle. Luca was cool, he was one of the only tolerable boys in this frat aside from Harry. Hearing his girlfriend's name, Harry turned around from where he sat on the ground and reached out for his girlfriend to sit beside him. Much to Y/N’s dismay, Harry was wasted. His eyes were half mass and his words bumped and slurred together. “We are playing truth or dare, wanna play?” Luca asked.
“I don't wanna play but Ill sit and watch.” Sitting next to her boyfriend, she grabbed one of his hands holding it in her lap. She was annoyed at him but it did her no good to show it when he was this drunk.
This game of truth or dare was childish. Dares of licking people's shoes and taking multiple shots had been done and truths about money and relationships were being spilled among the group. It had finally become Harry’s turn to do something, making Y/N tense.
“Ok Harry, I dare you to…” One drunk frat boy started looking around the room trying to come up with something clever. His eyes landed on a pretty girl in the room, Yara, a stuck up girl who for sure got her way no matter what. “I dare you to kiss the hottest girl in the room- obviously not your girlfriend because that defeats the purpose.” The frat boy smirked knowing what his intentions were. Everyone in the group giggles and gasped shocked by the dare but ready to see what was going to go down. Y/N’s brows furrowed as she became angry with the stupid dare.
The ache in her chest seemed to tip over the edge when she felt her boyfriend in the room move to stand up. She grabbed at the bottom of his shirt as a way of stopping him. Harry halted his movements to look down at his girlfriend. He giggled a little.
“You’re not actually going to do this right?” She asked Harry with wide eyes of shock. Harry laughed at her like she made a joke, making her heart hurt even more.”Harry I do not want you to do this just take the shot and lose the dare.” Her tone held warning.
“Don't be silly of course I'm going to. It's just a dare, nothing serious. Don't be so clingy.” He stood walking over to Yara and planted a wet kiss on her mouth. Yara gripped Harry’s shirt and kissed him harder. The kiss went on for a few more seconds, the room absolutely silent out of shock. Harry stepped back from Yara slightly sobering up from his actions. Yara smirked at Y/N, hand gliding down the front of Harry's shirt.
Y/N stood from the seat she was in and scoffed. Scoffed because she should've known Harry would do something like this. Scoffed because it hurt to see her boyfriend do something so careless without any regard for his girl's feelings. She pulled herself together, feeling her throat tighten once again. She was quick to leave the room and down the hall of the frat.
Harry's clumsy steps could be heard from behind her as he mumbled her name. Or at least he tried to. He was still so out of it, his words not making much sense. Y/N was crying now, the strength that she had slowly dissolving as she walked further away from her boyfriend.
“Y/N wait. P-please wait. I cant-” Harry stumbled over his legs behind her falling into the grass of the front yard. The girl couldn't help but turn around looking at her stupid boyfriend. She was choking on sobs now. She wasn't crying over a measly little kiss but over an extreme amount of burnout from school and exhaustion from simply existing. She was crying because her boyfriend ignored her boundaries, crushing and erasing the boundaries she had set in their relationship. Harry tried reaching for her once she had stopped walking. His hand clasped around her wrist, he laid his head down on her shoulder. He hated seeing her cry even if he was too drunk to see why.
“Baby don't leave, Im-Im Sorry.” He hiccuped and burped due to the alcohol. Y/N felt her rage build. Shoving Harry off of her, she crossed her arms across her chest as a way to shield herself from Harry physically. He was hurt by her distance and the wall she put up around her.
“You're an idiot Harry. An idiot!” her sobs grew louder, some stray party goers watching in amusement- some even snapchatting it for shits and giggles. “I didnt want you to kiss her and you did. What provoked you to think that was ok? All I wanted was for us to hang out tonight and just be us and you did this!” She was yelling now. Her hurt is beyond her now. Anger and rage simmered throughout her body making her head dizzy and her fingers curl within themselves. She didnt like being angry. It wasn't an emotion she liked acting on, it felt impersonal.
“Baby I don't under-” Before Harry could finish his sentence he was barfing at his feet. Y/N stepped back disgusted with her boyfriend. She couldn't even feel remorseful because of how angry she was. Luca, the frat brother from earlier, caught up with Harry and his girl only to find Harry doubled over heaving. Luca wrapped his arms around Harry's shoulders.
“I'm sorry Luca but I can't do this tonight. Can you please make sure he gets some water and goes to bed. I-I can't do it tonight, I wish I could but I can't.” Y/N didn't want to leave her boyfriend in this state but she didn't deserve this. She wasn't going to care for her drunk boyfriend when all she wanted to do was care for herself. Selfishly, she enjoyed seeing him this way because of the anger he caused her.
Luca shook his head in understandment. “Of course, I'm really sorry for tonight. He's going to seriously regret this in the morning, especially since it will be circulating all over snapchat in the morning.” Luca waved to Y/N then proceeded to pull Harry into the house. Harry called out for Y/N not wanting to be away from her but Luca pulled him harder.
Harry woke up the next morning feeling like the bottom of a dumpster. He wasn't shocked by that. He knew he got trashed last night, he had planned to. He, just like Y/N, spent all week studying and completing projects while also fulfilling certain responsibilities for his frat. He wanted one night to be a normal teen. So he drank and drank and drank and maybe even smoked some weed. As he tried to recall last night's events he came up with nothing. He didn't understand why Y/N wasn't here with him like she normally would after a party on the weekend. They were normally always together during the weekend. A bad feeling loomed over him. He could tell something wasn't right but decided to put his feelings to the side.
He saw a bottle of water beside his bed making him think she was probably here and left early. Chugging the water he started to go through his socials to see if anyone had posted about the party. He had multiple tagged pics and videos in his notifications from snapchat. Way more than he normally would.
The first video he saw was a video of him and Y/N standing in the front yard of the frat house. Turning the volume all the way up he could hear Y/N yelling, it shocked him. She doesn't normally raise her voice, especially not at him. The angle changed showing her face which was red with anger, eyes filled with unshed tears. He could hear her yelling about him kissing someone else. He felt his heart stop. He had kissed someone else? On the next snap was a picture of him keeled over vomiting on his shoes with the caption saying, ‘are yall seeing this shit?’ Harry was embarrassed but he was more concerned than anything.
His head was hurting but it didn't stop him from rolling out of bed, washing up, and putting on a fresh set of clothes. He checked his phone hoping Y/N had messaged him but nothing was there. He walked into the kitchen only to see luca sitting at the counter eating cereal.
“Hey Harry….” Luca said warily. Luca pushed the cereal around his bowl feeling the tension begin to rise in the room. He felt horrible about his friends.
“Luca...what's up?” Harry was confused by Lucas' wariness.
“So do you remember anything about last night?” Luca asked, setting his cereal down in the sink behind him. Harry started playing with the frayed edges of a bracelet Y/N made for him. It had little beads with her name on it. They made them together at an event on campus.
“I don't, I only saw the videos of Y/N screaming at me. I think I fucked up but I- I don't know what happened.” Harry's cheek flushed with even more embarrassment. Luca awkwardly chuckled scratching the back of his neck.
“You got dared to kiss the hottest girl in the room and um actually did it in front of Y/N...even though she didn't want you to. Which led you guys outside and yeah you know the rest...Im sorry dude, I wish I had stopped you.”
“Who- who did I kiss?” Harrys stomach lurched when he heard Yara’s name come out of Lucas' name. Y/N didn't like Yara and it was understandable. Yara has been pining after Harry since their first year of college. Harry couldn't breathe. He felt disgusted with himself. He could only imagine how Y/N was feeling.
Y/N woke up the same morning, eyes puffy and crusty from tears and head hurting. She probably cried herself into dehydration. She was lucky enough to have no roommate because she wouldn't have wanted someone else to see her breakdown. She still couldn't believe last night went down the way it went down. She couldn't tell if she was just being overdramatic or if her emotions were in the right place. She didn't want to be mad at Harry. He was everything to her, she had an odd connection to him. Meeting him during their freshman welcome week they quickly became best friends with a growing romantic connection in the mix. They started dating before Christmas break. They had grown close so fast that he even came home with her to meet her family for the first few days of break.  Even though they were in their junior year of college, Y/N could see them beyond college. She's imagined them getting married, travelling, sharing a home. She saw the whole future with him. She had her doubts though. He was immature just like every other boy in college. He was dumb with his actions and tended to only do things if they benefited him. He had a lot of growing to do as a person, so did she but she wanted to grow with him.
She heard a knock on her door hesitating to answer it because one, it could be Harry, and two, she looked like a wreck. Answering anyways, she was met with a very sorry looking Harry holding a small coffee and bagel from their cafe.
“Hi baby…” He sheepishly said holding out the items. She silently let him through the door not once looking him in the eye. He stepped into her room, setting her treats on her desk. He could see that her bed was messy meaning she recently woke up. Y/N never went about her day without making her bed. He turned back to her and finally their eyes met. He took in all of her facial features, from her puffy eyes, to her downturned lips that looked chapped, to her flushed cheeks that longed to be held for warmth. He hated to see her like this, the last time he saw her so upset was when her parents moved out of her childhood home. It took alot to make Y/N this upset. She was normally really headstrong and vigilant. She knew how to ease her way out of problematic situations and could talk her way through anything.
Harry opened his mouth to speak but was cut off by Y/N holding her hand up in front of his face. “Don't talk. I'm really hurt Harry, so if your plan was to come over here and apologize over bagels- think again.” She snapped, backing up to put space between the two of them. She sat down on her bed while Harry pulled the desk chair out and sat down. He much preferred to be on the bed with her holding her tight but he didn't want to overstep boundaries.
“Love, I don't know where to begin. I'm really sorry for what happened last night. I was really drunk and obviously wasn't in the right headspace.” Harry reached out and touched the tips of her fingers with his. She wanted to move but it felt good to be touched by Harry.
“I told you that a measly little apology won't do Harry. I didn't want you to kiss Yara and you did anyway. You know how Yara feels about you and you just let it happen!” She pulled her hand away remembering the prior night's events. Harry felt himself getting angry too. He felt like he needed to defend himself- even though it would be a very bad idea.
“I think you're being over dramatic.” Wrong move Harry. “It wasn't like I was making out with her!”
“You're joking right?” She scoffed and scooted further up her bed to create more distance. “Harry it's the simple fact that you did something that made me uncomfortable that shouldn't have even happened. I see myself getting married to you and it makes me worry that right now in our relationship you can't respect my boundaries!” She yelled. Harry’s eyes widened as he laughed sarcastically.
“Married? What the fuck are you on about? I'm a junior in college. In what world would it make sense for me to be prepping a relationship for marriage? Once again I think you're being over dramatic.” Her eyes watered hearing Harry's statement.
“I- I guess I'm the only one in this relationship thinking about the future? I thought we were on the same page. I'm not planning our marriage now, obviously. I'm thinking about how elements of our relationship now could play out in the future when we do want to get married. You cheated on me last night. I went to a party you begged ME to go to only to be there for you. I wanted to be here cuddling with you, pigging out on fast food but I was at a party with you and got cheated on!” Her volume rises once again, making Harry shove his chair from underneath him when he stands up.
“You're doing too much right now. I'm not planning a future right now because I don't want this future! I want to be myself without thinking about how to appease my girlfriend. I invited you to the party so you could lighten the fuck up. I love you, I do, but I'm not thinking of marriage and futures. I'm thinking about my life right now and having fun.” Harry snapped right back at her. Her chin wobbled. Obviously her and Harry were on different pages. It hurt so much to hear him say that he didn't want a future with her. Harry didn't mean it though.
“Ok, well I guess that's my fault for assuming we were thinking along the same lines. Um, I don't want to hold you back from being yourself so with that being said, you are a free man Harry.” She pushed herself up from her bed walking to the door ready to escort Harry out.
“Huh? Love, what?” Harry was confused on how they got to this point. Just a few days ago they were in love, meeting in the library to share a lunch and exchanging sweet words determined by their love.
“Listen I have a day full of exams tomorrow so if you could just leave that would be best. You don't really want this so I'm letting you go, Harry.” She had tears rolling down her face, falling from her eyes down to her chin where they fell to the ground in droplets. Harry’s eyes welled up watching his love cry before him.
“I don't-”
“Harry, leave, please.” She opened the door making room for him to go through. He walked through the door turning to look at her. She turned her face away from him whispering a small goodbye before shutting the door. Harry was left in the silent hallway, so silent he could hear his thoughts and the tears hitting the tile floor beneath him. He thinks he stood there for at least thirty more minutes before accepting what had happened and walking away.
Leaving Y/N in her room sobbing like she had never done before. Her tears coated her face and she thought her head could explode right then and there. She didn't want to accept what had happened but she had priorities. She composed herself enough to start studying for her exams.
The week rolled by quickly, Monday meeting Friday in a flash. Exams were done and Christmas break was on the horizon. Students were piling off of campus in a hurry ready to get home to their loved ones. People were outside by cars loading up their winter necessaries and saying their goodbyes to their close friends.
Harry cried everyday this week. He wasn't normally a crier. He hated crying, he hated the feeling of crying and the headache that came from it. He cried because he realized how wrong he was. He missed Y/N. He missed finals week dinner together where they tried to get off campus at least once and be alone for a moment. He missed watching her relax while eating food that wasn't from their school's cafeteria. He would pay for their meal just so she could have one less thing to worry about. They would normally get frozen yogurt right after too, Y/N getting as many toppings as she wanted because Harry would be the one paying. He missed her tight after exam hugs. She would squeeze his shoulders tight, smiling into his neck, telling him how proud she was of him. She would bring him tea in the morning when they met for breakfast. Sometimes they would spend the night in one or the others room so they could have time together to destress and just talk.
Y/N wasn't doing any better. She normally went into exam week feeling confident. She studied too hard not to. But this week she felt like shit. Her heart hurt and she kept thinking about the fight. She feels like she overreacted but hearing Harry talk about their lack of a future hurt nonetheless. She really assumed that they did have a future that included marriage and a life together. She didn't understand where his sudden lack of commitment came from. She regretted dumping him but at the same time she wished he did more to get them back together but he was silent. He hasn't contacted her at all and avoided all of their spots on campus all together.
She stood by her car prepping for her six hours car ride back home. Packing away her clothes and some essentials in the trunk of her car, she heard light footsteps behind her. Closing her trunk she turned to see Harry standing with his hands in his pockets.  
“Hi.” He said. She looked at him, putting her own hands in her pockets. It was cold outside, the nippy air hinting at a possibility of snow.
“Hi Harry.” They shared a moment of silence together. Just staring at each other. It felt good to be near each other again. They felt like they could breathe again.
“I had to see you before you left. I know the break is only a month but I didn't want to leave without seeing you.” He replied quietly. She made him feel so shy. Her beauty always made him awestruck. Even in a hoodie with their college's logo and some large sweatpants and some fuzzy crocs, she was the most beautiful thing he's ever seen.
“I don't know what to say harry.”
“It's ok. I don't deserve anything from you after what I said. I just wanted to apologize and wish you a good break before you left. I also wanted to give you this.” He pulled a small box and envelope out of the front pocket of his backpack. “I know we agreed on no presents but I think thats a dumb rule and I love you too much to not get you something.” She smiled at his words, taking the gift from his hands.
“Thank you Harry, it means a lot to me. So what are your plans for a break?” She asked him, the tension that was in the air slowly dissipating.
“I couldn't get a flight home until next wednesday so i'll stay here on campus until then.” He shrugged.
“Oh ok. Well tell Anne I said hi. I have to go Harry but I'll see you after the break, ok?” She didn't want to leave him but she didn't want to drive through the dark.
“Ok, love. Drive safe. I lov- I mean have a good break.” Her chest tightened at his hesitation. She wants to hear him say the words but she knows he won't.
“Have a good break Harry.” She whispered. Before getting in her car she stood on her toes placing a kiss on the corner of his mouth. Rubbing her thumb across his cheek and turning away and into her car.
She drove away knowing that her heart was left in that parking lot in the hands of someone she loves way too much.
Harry stood in the parking lot watching his heart drive away for winter wanting nothing more than to be with her.
Part two
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adorerdraco · 4 years ago
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Good Enough ✧ Draco x Hufflepuff!Reader
Request: hiii i love your writing!! can you write about a sweet hufflepuff and how everyone thinks they aren’t a good pair together so one day Pansy bullies the reader into breaking it off with Draco because she feels like she’s not good enough for him then draco finds out and he’s really mad at Pansy?
Another seventh year AU where Voldermort never existed !
Warnings: bullying, slight angst, crying, cursing (barely), sad!draco, angry!draco, implied smut towards the end (also extra mean slytherins for the purpose of this imagine but i have nothing against them i <3 them as much as any other house)
Words: 4.5K
A/N: hiii thank youuuu 🥺💗 !!!!!! but ahhhh omg im a hufflepuff so i hope i delivered good hufflepuff energy in this oneee :’))) i think this might be my new favorite thing ive written omg but i do not own gif 
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There was truly no explanation how you, a kind Hufflepuff, managed to become friends, let alone a couple, with the proud and arrogant Slytherin Prince, Draco Malfoy. 
On the outside, your relationship to everyone seemed uncanny and plain wrong. Even your friends and housemates had looked down on it for a while but eventually came around and just let you be. You couldn’t say the same for the Slytherin’s, however, because if there was one house they disliked more than Gryffindor; it was Hufflepuff.
They berated you and Draco for weeks after they found out he had started a relationship with you. They scowled at you when you would walk by them sometimes calling you names depending on whether or not Draco was by your side. He always defended you and you did your best to ignore them, but they were relentless. You had only been dating for about a month now and the tantalizing comments from Slytherin’s and anyone else who wanted tear the two of you down were right now seeming endless.
“Why can’t people leave us alone,” you said sadly to him one night. You were lying with him in a patch of grass outside the castle, head against his chest as his hand lazily traced patterns onto your bicep.
“They’re only jealous,” he sneered quietly. “People get mad at what they can’t have or what they can't understand.”
Draco’s patience with people was worsening each and every day. His housemates, regularly, would corner him in the common room and interrogate him with questions that made him want to rip his hair out.
“Is this some sort of prank you haven’t told us about, Malfoy?”
“A Hufflepuff? Have you gone mad?”
“Is she blackmailing you with something, mate?”
“Haven’t you thought about how that makes us Slytherin’s look?”
“She’s a blood-traitor!”
The questioning would always lead to him yelling and threatening everyone aggressively before he locked himself in his Prefect dorm or would leave the common room altogether in a fury. Those were the days he would find you after he calmed down and would hug you tightly, pressing kisses all over your face as he praised you with everything he adored about you to how happy you made him and how perfect you were for him. 
You, on the other hand, were dealing with much worse. You never told Draco some of the awful things people would say to you when he wasn’t around. You would stand up for yourself very rarely, confrontation not really being your first approach to handling things but when the insults were bad enough, you were forced to.
You would always hear a variation of the same things said either directly to you or from obvious whispering, majority of them being from Slytherin and the occasional judgmental comment from others.
“Filthy Hufflepuff!”
“Can’t believe one of them is dating one of ours.”
“What does Malfoy even see in her?”
“You’d think someone who’s supposed to be kind wouldn’t want anything to do with such an arse.”
More than ever, Draco found himself giving you an excessive amount of compliments and reassurances that he thought would balance out the insults and criticisms you would tell him about or he would witness. Everything he would tell you was true, of course, but you always felt like he said them out of pity or like he had to.
“I appreciate you trying to make it better, but you don’t have to keep complimenting me, Dray.” You’ve said to him countless times.
And he would often respond with, “but I need you to know how I feel about you.”
Despite the constant uphill battle, your relationship with the platinum blond was everything you hoped for and more. Considering your friendship had started on rocky beginnings a year ago, you would have never thought you’d be with him now.  You couldn’t thank the stars more for when your aged and nearly blind owl had flown straight into the back of his head, pecking at him while he tried to swat it away which then led to him giving you a piece of his mind and trying to hex your owl - causing you to try to hex him just as McGonagall happened to be passing by the fiasco that landed both of you in a months-long detention for reckless magic usage. It was in detention when the two of you were forced to spend time together and realized that the other wasn’t as bad as they thought.
Draco, much like everyone else, always believed Hufflepuffs to be weak and cowardly, too kind for their own good - but he quickly learned how common of a misconception that was the longer he knew you. You always fought for what was morally right, defended those you love and are loyal to courageously, and were sweet and friendly with everyone you talked to whether you knew them or not.
He gravitated towards your kindness and empathetic approach to everything. He loved to see the smiles you put on people’s faces or the way animals would randomly come up to you and immediately trust you enough to give them gentle pets that they always leaned into. He even loved the way you talked to everyone as your equals, something he rarely saw in his environment. Everything you did was a vast difference to what he saw on the daily from his cold and aloof peers, but it was a difference he enjoyed. He wished so deeply that everyone could see and understand how amazing you were to him and he was determined to make it happen.
“Are you sure this is a good idea?” You asked shyly as he held your hand tightly in his, walking you slowly over to his large group of his closest Slytherin friends that were all gathered around a bench under a tree in the courtyard.
The Prince of Slytherin believed that if he could get his friends to at least tolerate you, then everyone else would follow in suit. He only associated himself with the best and most influential of his house so if there was anyone that could improve his current situation; it would be them. You were a little uneasy about his plan, but later agreed when he had convinced you that his idea couldn’t and wouldn’t fail.
“Of course it is!” He exclaimed encouragingly. “Plus, I’m Draco Malfoy, they’ll like anything I tell them to like.”
“Okay,” you sighed, rolling your eyes slightly at his boast.
The closer you got to them, the more you felt your hands begin to sweat and the heat crawling up your face. They all began to turn towards the two of you, their eyes focusing on you and you only with a pointed gaze. You started to realize how greatly you underestimated how intimidating they looked. Especially the one girl who made it her mission to bother you every chance she could get - always from afar while she pointed at you and whispered something into her friend’s ears while they laughed or when she would pass by you and say something rude under her breath.
“Look what Malfoy’s dragged in!” Pansy Parkinson called out with a malicious smirk on her face as she eyed you.
“Give it a rest, Pansy,” Blaise sighed, “If Malfoy wants us to meet his little friend then so be it.”
“Not my little friend, my girlfriend,” Draco corrected angrily as the two of you finally reached the group. “This is Y/N and I wanted you all to meet her since I plan on having her around for a long while, so you might as well get used to it.”
“Long while? Poor thing can’t even introduce herself,” Pansy laughed tauntingly.
“I think Draco introduced me just fine right now but if you want, I’ll do it again to make you feel better,” you smiled a big fake toothy grin at her. “Hi, I’m Y/N.”
Everyone snickered at your response, watching for the girl’s reaction as her nostrils flared in irritation. Draco smiled to himself and gave your hand a quick squeeze, feeling proud that you found a way to talk back to her in the nicest way possible.
“Right, well, I’m sure you know this is; Goyle, Crabbe, Zabini, Pike, Flint, Nott, and...” Draco pointed to everyone, trailing off when he reached the only girl in the group, “I don’t think that one needs an introduction, she rather do it herself, right Parkinson?”
She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, giving the blond a false squinty-eyed grin with attitude.
“So, you want us to be the nice to the Hufflepuff then?” Zabini questions, pointing a finger towards you.
“Yes, I want you to be nice to, Y/N,” Draco corrected again, his hand getting tighter in your grasp as he spoke. “That goes for all of you and everyone else in this bloody house. I don’t want to hear anything bad about her or us coming from anyone ever again or you’ll have me to answer to. I don’t care how friendly we are.”
“So he has to defend you too now?” Pansy spoke again, “Merlin, it’s a wonder how you Hufflepuff sort even survive in this world.”
Before anyone could say anything, you mustered up all the courage you had and stepped forward towards the irked girl in front of you.
“Listen, I don’t want any more trouble with you or anyone,” you rushed out. “I just want to go about my day without having to hear how disgusting and weak I am.”
She opened her mouth to retaliate but Blaise put a hand in front of her and pushed her back before she got any closer to you.
“Alright, we’ll try,” he answered for the group quickly in an annoyed tone, “but I can’t promise that for the rest of Slytherin. They really don’t like you guys together, thinks it makes them look bad. Eventually, they’ll get tired of it and move on to the next.”
“That’s as good as its gonna get,” Goyle guffawed, Crabbe and Pike snickering alongside him.
You sighed, looking up at Draco and slightly tugging at his hand while you silently begged him to take you out of there but he didn’t catch the hint and instead did the complete opposite when he had turned towards the only boy in the group who seemed to have brains.
“Zabini, can I talk to you really quick?” He asked gruffly. Blaise deeply sighed and nodded, the two boys breaking away from the group and stopping a few feet away before talking in angry hushed voices to each other.
You - all of a sudden felt very small and sick, your eyes frantically bouncing around the group as they watched you squirm. Pansy took this as her chance to step closer towards you, stopping a few inches away from you while a smirk made its way onto her face.
“Since you obviously don’t see the bigger picture, I’ll paint it for you,” she began contemptuously, “you and Draco really don’t belong together, at all. Sure, you might think everything’s fine right now, but what’ll happen when he gets tired of defending you and proving you to everyone. You think Hogwarts is your problem? Just wait until you meet the Malfoy’s. Do you really think his father would like or even tolerate a filthy blood traitor like you?”
You gaped at her, taking a few shaky steps away from her as her words hit you like a truck.
“Think about it, Y/L/N,” she gets in your face again, her hand reaching up to grip your shoulder tightly to hold you in place. “He needs to be with someone of his status, a pure-blooded Slytherin who comes from a good wealthy family who holds all the same beliefs as the Malfoy’s. If I were you, I’d end it before you ruin his life any more than you already have and end up leaving him without a family or his inheritance.”
“Are you trying to say that ‘someone’ should be you?” You question through gritted teeth, shrugging your shoulder hard out of her clawed grasp.
“I never said that,” she smiles, “but who am I to say it shouldn’t be?” 
Pansy tauntingly walked away from you, a smug look on her face as she noticed just how obviously she had hurt you. You wanted to run away and cry, but you held it together for the sake of your last remaining dignity and so that you wouldn’t please your assailant even more than you already have.
Draco turned to stroll back towards the group with Blaise, his eyes landing on your shuddering figure and the broken look in your eyes as they met his. He looked around at the rest of the group who were talking amongst themselves, unknowing to them that Parkinson had just ripped a new one on you. She stood around them, looking at her nails with an uninterested look in her eyes and when she felt Draco’s eyes on her, she looked up and smiled at him innocently. 
‘Bitch,’ you thought.
He slowly walked towards you, taking your hand and deeply frowning when you immediately slipped it out of his.
“What’s wrong?” His voice dripped with concern, his sad gray’s searching your face for any answer as to why you were suddenly acting so cold.
“I need to talk to you,” you breathed out. “Alone.”
He nodded, instinctively reaching out for your hand only for you to reject it again. He felt queasy at the response, his heart falling to his stomach as you turned around and began walking away. His legs were moving hastily behind you, a dooming tension had fallen between the two of you and he couldn’t for the life of him find a reason why.
Pansy’s words were like a game of pinball on a constant loop in your mind. Your thoughts were bumping and flying haphazardly as you tried to make sense of them and what you were about to do. And as much as you hated to admit it - the wench was right. You would never be able to offer Draco and his family anything that would ever be close to enough. You were just a sweet, regular Hufflepuff, someone far from who his family expected to date. And what if you did end up staying with him? You figured you would end up breaking up years later when he would be forced to marry someone else. Or in the slight chance, he fought against that, there was no way you’d forgive yourself if he lost his family and his future because of your own selfish needs.
You stopped at an empty corridor, sitting at one of the windowsills you regularly sat at with the platinum blond when the two of you snuck out at night to meet each other. Your head fell into your hands, your thoughts raging louder in your head and now through your body as you began to unwillingly shake. The held back tears had finally broken out in a waterfall of sadness, frustration, and grief.
Draco only watched, his heartbreaking at the sight as he kneeled in front of you, his hands resting on your knees while he tried to figure out what to say.
“Darling, please tell me what’s gotten you like this,” he pleads sadly. “If it’s about what Blaise said, I made a deal with him so he would try and help.”
“No, it’s not that,” you answered, choking back the lump in a feeble attempt to try and get yourself calmed down enough to talk to him.
He sat back on his heels, his hand running down his face in distress as he racked through his brain for anything else that might have gotten you like this. He let you cry for a bit, feeling useless as he watched you go through an internal battle he had no clue about.
“Then what is it? Tell me and I’ll fix it,” he says softly when he saw your tears had finally been reduced to stray droplets on your face.
“You can’t,” you sniffle. Your hand weakly brushed over his paled slender fingers that were holding your knee gently. He turned his palm upwards for you and you placed your shaking hand in his while you basked in the final moments of his warmth. You regrettably slipped out of his grip before you spoke the words you couldn’t take back. “We can’t be together anymore.”
Draco blinked, his stomach dropping as soon as the words left your mouth. “What?”
You stood up, backing away from him as you shook your head. “Everyone was right - I’ll never be good enough for you, for your friends, for your family. You deserve to be with someone who makes your life easier, not harder.”
“Where did all this come from?” He asks incredulously, standing up from his spot on the floor as he painfully watched your slowly retreating figure. “It’s all rubbish is what it is. You’ve never made my life harder.”
“Draco, look around you!” You exasperated, your arms flailing around you. “You had to make a deal with your own friends for them to even be nice to me. Your house can’t stand me and they take it out on the both of us! And what about your parents? You know for a fact they would hate me, don’t even try and deny it.”
Pale hands ran through his hair, his fingers pulling at the platinum strands in frustration.
“I thought you didn’t care about all that,” he said woefully. “I thought you’d know by now none of it matters.”
“Well, I care now,” you answer back gloomily. “And you should too.”
There was a spinning and nauseating feeling in the pit of the Slytherin’s stomach, his heart violently jumping around in his chest as he let you storm away from him. 
He let his back fall against a pillar, a deep and burning exhale falling from his trembling lips while he stared at a live painting across from him. It was of three women, the chalices in their hands supposed to be joined in a toast above them while they smiled gleefully in celebration, 3 of Chalices, it read in the caption below the frame. Instead of being in their usual position, they stared at him with pity in their softly painted eyes as they slowly raised their cups towards him in a way of showing their condolences.
He nodded curtly at them before he kicked himself off the wall and dragged himself towards the Great Hall where they were serving dinner and where he would undoubtedly find his so-called friends. He prepared himself to break the news to them, knowing they would be over the moon about it and as much as he wanted to join them in their delight, he couldn’t push away the large ache that had settled itself in his chest.
“We’re done,” he muttered dreadfully to himself, “it’s over.”
He was testing out different ways he could tell everyone the long-awaited news but they all left a bitter taste in his mouth.
“I think you’ll all be delighted to know, Y/N-” he tried again but he lost his train of thought when he spoke your name. It was like taking an invisible kick to his heart as if Peeves the Poltergeist had somehow crawled into his body and was wreaking his usual havoc on his insides. 
The second he stepped into the Great Hall and saw his group sitting there, eating and laughing amongst everyone else, he felt sick all over again. There was no way he could stomach the triumph they were about to unleash, but he sucked it up and drudged towards them anyway.
“You look ghastly,” Pansy snickers, already having a feeling as to why he looked so rough. He stopped at the bench, hesitating to sit down because he knew he’d want to dash the second everyone started to relentlessly bash you.
“Deal’s off, Zabini,” the blond spoke lowly. “I’m not with Y/L/N anymore so it doesn’t matter.”
“You’re better off without her, Malfoy,” Blaise said delightedly. “Can’t believe you nearly had us associating with a blood traitor. It’s better that she’s gone.”
“Yeah, we ought to thank Pansy for that,” Crabbe laughed loudly through a mouthful of food. Pansy kicked his shin under the table, and he recoiled too fast, the food in his mouth getting shot in the wrong direction as he started choking.
“Pansy?” Draco repeated, his eyes falling towards the shying girl. “What did Pansy do?”
“What?” Crabbe coughed roughly, “did no one else see her talking to the ickle Hufflepuff?”
Pansy kicked him again and he wailed out a “stop kicking me, you donkey!”
Any ounce of sadness Draco had in his body was immediately washed out in rage. He wanted to flip over the table and scream at everyone in his path, but he only turned towards Pansy again and asked her calmly.
“What did you say to her?”
“I only told her the truth!” She said coyly, holding her hands up in defense.
“What” his fist had slammed onto the table making everyone sitting near the contact jump in surprise, “did you say to her!”
“The truth! Or are you too blind to see it too?” She sneered at him. “Do you honestly think the two of you would last? Look at who you are, Draco!”
“Talk to me ever again and I swear I’ll hex you,” he spat, turning hot on his heel as he stormed out of the Great Hall, his friends staring at his retreating figure in shock at the outburst.
Draco found himself rushing through stairs and corridors, his heart racing as he searched for the place he just knew you’d be. Now that he knew the full story, he needed to talk to you. Even if you didn’t change your mind, he wanted to at least try to fix what had been broken. The tall and bronzed doors were ajar, a small light filtering through the dark corridor he was nearly running down. 
A mop of bright silver hair had peaked through the crack in the doors of the Hogwarts kitchen, worried gray eyes following in suit as they searched the room for its target. He found you hunched over a small dessert plate, a half-eaten cake being drenched in your tears that never seemed to stop. There was a house-elf next to you, looking up at you from the floor in concern while they patted your leg. 
“Mister!” a scraggly voice croaked out from below him. He looked down to find a rugged looking house-elf staring up at him with furrowed eyebrows and hands on its hips. “Students are prohibited in the kitchen.”
“There’s a student right there,” he pointed towards you.
“She’s an exception!” the elf exclaimed wildly.
Draco shook his head before walking past the small creature, power walking straight towards you while it ran behind him.
“Wait till Gonpy tells the Headmaster about this!” The elf calls, “Gonby asks your name, sir!””
“Vincent Crabbe,” Draco answers mindlessly as he continued walking towards the far end of the room that very closely resembled the Great Hall and its vastness.
The familiar accent rang through your ears, your glassy eyes shooting up in surprise when you see the reason for your tears hurrying towards you.
“Before you say anything, you need to listen to me,” he starts desperately once he reaches you. “I know it was Pansy who put those thoughts into your head. I know you think you’re not enough for me. And I know you think I was always complimenting you out of pity, but you couldn’t be more wrong about any of that. I say all those things to you because I mean it. You are everything to me. You are more than enough for me just by being you. You make me the happiest I’ve ever been and sometimes I wonder if I’m even good enough for you. But you need to understand how much I love you.”
“Draco,” you breathe, heart leaping in your chest at his rambling speech, “I love you too. But what about everyone else, how are we even supposed to be with each other in peace?”
“To hell with everyone else,” he responds quickly, walking around the edge of the table so that he was now only mere centimeters away from you. “Do you want to be with me?”
“Yes, of course,” you blink at him, “but do you really think your parents would let this happen?”
“We’ll deal with them when the time comes,” he mumbles, his hand finding its way to your puffy cheek where he let it rest. “Besides, my mother likes anything that makes me happy, so I know for a fact at least she will end up loving you just as much as I do.”
You nodded happily, a new hope bubbling in your stomach as you lurched towards him and hugged the stressed boy against you tightly. The both of you let out a breath of relief at the same time from the contact, finally feeling back in balance after the short-lived sorrow. 
He pulled away from you and leaned down into you, his lips capturing yours in a tender and passionate kiss. That was when the elves you had forgotten about had quickly stopped eavesdropping, scurrying themselves away from the table as they went to start cleaning up the kitchen. 
It was minutes before you had finally pulled away, looking dreamily into the happy gray’s that gazed back at you. You admired him for a couple seconds, feeling very content before you reached up towards him again, tangling your hands in his hair and pressing another kiss onto his now swollen lips. He moved needily against you, pushing your body flush the table as he held you tightly against him.
“Ahem,” a small voice uncomfortably called out from below. It was the same elf who had chased Draco down the kitchen when he walked in, a frown on his face as he stared at the two of you. “Gonpy and the house-elves make food here!”
“I’m sorry, Gonpy,” you hurriedly apologize, ripping yourself away from a ragged breathing Draco as you bent down to shake hands with the elf. “Thank you for making me cake and letting me cry here, you’re a Hogwarts hero.”
“Gonpy thanks you, Miss Y/L/N! The truest, kindest Hufflepuff!” 
Draco bit back a smile at the interaction. You stood up and reached your hand behind you for the Slytherin to take and as the two of you walked away, he yelled out a quick, “Thanks Gonpy!”
And once the two of you were near the exit, he wrapped his arms around you from behind and pressed his body against your back, lowering his mouth towards your ear and kissing the skin right below it before whispering, “do you want to go back to my dorm?”
You nodded eagerly, giggling loudly as the two of you stumbled out of the door underneath his hold and into the dimly lit corridor before pulling apart and racing towards the direction of the dungeons with his hand interlocked in yours.
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souichieatr · 4 years ago
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wanna be yours, ch2
suna x freader , foxy boy
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where in which two opposites fall in love
a/n: for everyone who commented on the posts youve been added sorry i cant reply <//3 if you're interested in being in the taglist send me an ask, i was thinking of making a playlist for the au would anyone be interested? lmk !! sorry if there are any mistakes or if its bad this is my first writing <3
ch1. this voice im hearing rn? , hey bestie
word count: 2,090
the first song- The Ghost of You- my chemical romance
second song- I Bet on Losing dogs- mitski
third song- Crybaby- destroy boys
pocketing her phone after reading tendous message, she opens the door waving to a couple friends and offers friendly smile taking her seat. a pair of pale green eyes follow her. after yesterday suna did a little research about her y/n y/l/n the bassist and youngest in the band called 4u, she has quite a big following on twitter, she's really nice and interacts with the fans. looking at her now you can't imagine her on stage suna thought. breaking away from his thoughts as the teacher walks in. spouting for about what feels like hours and the students taking notes, finally lunch approaches. y/n jumps from her seat grabbing her case she walks to the third year hallway. waving to her friends they walk to her, tendou wrapping his arms around her “y/n!!!!!! i missed you” laughing as she hugged him back “tendou!!! i missed you toooo.” she turns to the grey haired male, “semisemi!!” she says giving him a hug, he rolls his eyes and hugs her back “and ushi!!” she turns to the brunette to which he pats her head “good afternoon y/n.” as they go to the lunch room to grab their lunch, they walk to one of the music rooms they usually occupy. a beep from her phone grabs her attention seeing her friend atsumu asking if him his twin and their friend can join for lunch, “hey guys you dont mind if atsumu and his friends come join us?” she says setting down her case against the wall. “nah you can invite them, atsumu is our biggest hype man” tendou says, grabbing his drum sticks from his back pocket. texting him its cool she goes to unzip her bass. “oh ms lady ive missed you” she says hugging the instrument, “i can't believe you two and always wanting to play, dont yall have any other hobby?” semi says, grabbing the schools given guitar setting the speaker up for y/n. tendou gives a scoff “semisemi dont act like you hate hearing us play i see you listening to our covers alllll the timeeeee” he says “yeah semi besides we have a concert soon and it wouldnt be bad to have an audience” y/n says walking to semi to connect her bass to the speaker when the door opens, entering is atsumu in the middle, osamu on his left, and a mystery guy in the back. setting her bass down running up to the blond “tsumu!!” giving him a hug “y/n!!” he hugs her back, she waves to osamu, who shes met on an occasion. looking towards the dark haired guy she walks up to him, noticing shes seen him somewhere. “youre suna right? we're in the same class?” she says giving him a hand and a awkward smile, nodding at her words. “hope its okay im here” he says taking her hand giving a slight shake. “nah dont worry its nice to have a different face, seeing tsumu is getting boring” turning around to the male. “what she means to say is we could use practice in front of new people” the grey haired male says giving a small laugh when tendou scoffs at him, both guys walking towards the small group. “this is semi and this is tendou” she says introducing them. when the introductions are over the two males go back to setting up, y/n walks the newcomers to the sitting area “here you guys can sit, im sure you all know ushijima” on hearing his name he looks up from his name giving a small head bow. they all sit “any recommendations tsumu?” y/n says walking to her bass making sure everything was good, looking towards the small group. “y/n you know my favorites” atsumu says stealing one of his brothers onigiri. y/n laughs and rolls her eyes, turning to tendou “anything you wanna try tori?” tendou looks at her with a smile “y/n lets show semi whatweve been working on” hearing this semi looked at them “what do you guys mean? what did you two do” y/n chuckles at the grey hairs doubtful expression “mr semisemi you know your favorite mcr song” when she sees him nod she continues “me and tori learned it” she says pushing him lightly. semi looked at her with wide eyes then at tendou, looking at semi tendou flicked his drum stick between his fingers with a nod. “wow semi cant believe you, we spent so much hours perfecting a my chemical romance for your sap self and he doesn't believe us y/nie i might
” tendou says fake sniffing. the little group in the back beyond confused, atsumu clearing his throat “have you three forgotten us already, wheres our show” ushijima nodding his head “yeah why are you guys being so vague” tendou snickers “dont worry you three and wakatoshi we have decided to play a new song or well cover i should say” “yeah and its semi’s favorite band you know the one that he wears on his shirts?” ushijima looking towards the girl after hearing her statement he nods. “okay can we play now ive been waiting to show my skills and get our lovely semi's opinion” y/n says removing her pick, both boys giving a ‘yeah’. finally tendou does the countdown. suna looks at all three of them with slight excitement in his stomach, ‘is this a new song im going to hear?’ before he could think of anything else, semi started playing a few chords by himself and y/n starting to add her own strums then tendou adding drums. sunas eyes widen at how well all the sounds blended together, freezing in his spot when semi started singing, when hitting the chorus y/n joins him. suna looking at her, he felt like he had been put in a trance, feeling like theres a spotlight on her when she starts nodding her head seeing her tongue sticking out when stringing the instrument. towards the end you can see y/n lose focus and her eye twitches, ending the song she sighs. “hey sorry about the end” waving to the guys to her left with a frown. hearing applause from the group the frown doesnt last long. “WHOOO!!!!! THAT WAS MY BESTIES GO SEMI! GO TENDOU! GO Y/N!!” atsumu gets up and yells. “that was so good what the hell that was yer first time too?” he says going up to the group, high-fiving y/n. “i mean me and tendou practiced together but semi basically has every song by them memorized but together? yeah our first.” tendou getting up to get his water that was next to ushijima. semi joining the fake blond and the girl, patting her on her back “that was a good first for us i can tell you and tendou worked hard, we're definitely adding it to the set list.” getting a laugh from both of them semi walks to the small group. “hey man that was really good, you have a nice voice” suna says as semi approaches, semi turned to him surprised “oh thank you im glad you enjoyed, do you listen to our stuff?” he says taking a seat next to him. “ive recently just started, i hope that doesnt sound too weird” the dark haired suddenly getting a little embarrassed, chuckling “its not weird i promise, well its good you listen to us or im sure it would've been awkward to just be here” nodding along to what he said. tendou going back to the drums “are you cowards tapping out now?” “COWARDS?!?!” y/n yells back turning around “i am no coward tendou satori i'll make you eat those words semi get over here” she said grabbing semis attention and shooing atsumu back to his seat. chuckling as he sat back down, turning to suna “howd ya like em? theyre good huh?” suna rolling his eyes “im not going to help inflate your ego tsumu” “yeah tsumu yer big ego is not cute” gasping to their remarks “you guys are so mean to me, i introduce you to nice music and even the artists and this is the thanks i get” before any could respond tendou starts clicking his sticks. starting this one is tendou with a slower sound, y/n entering second then semi with vocals. y/n leans down to mess with something by her foot turning a notch noises like static come out adding to the music, coming up fast she starts adding her vocals complimenting semis. pressing on the box she leans down as more noises come out. atsumu leans over to sunas ear “thats a pedal that holds other sounds and can help stretch other sounds” suna giving him a nod. towards the end y/n reaches down to the pedal again adding a distorted sound before adding her last bit of ‘oohs’ before the song ends. everyone clapping as the members stay still for s bit before y/n dramatically bows “youre so welcome lovely audience” she says blowing kisses to them, laughing at her atsumu jumps up and down pretending to be a crazy fan “oh y/n you were so go
od i love you y/n!!!” y/n laughing at him. “hey atsumu what about me!” tendou asks swinging his hand “howd i do?” “oh tendou you were so good, i love you too tendou!!!” he says swinging his arm back. tendou satisfied with his response nods his head, “and with that lets play one more i still want time to actually eat before we play again later.” “yeah lets try ‘crybaby’ we haven't done that in awhile” semi says getting in position.“remember y/n you do the verses” y/n nods clearing her throat “go tori” she says and tendou starts the counting again. starting the counting fast he gets one beat then y/n starts off with singing, swinging her bass back she grabs the mic. suna cracks a smile nodding his head a little as he remembers this song on their youtube, atsumu whistling when y/n dips down her mic as she sings, letting the boys have a solo in between verses she bobs her head. the last few seconds of the song she swings the instrument back as she steps on the pedal creating feedback, as semi goes to vocals she starts getting a solo with tendou playing, y/n leans forward and her and semi sing the rest of the song. after the last note they all look out of breath. clapping for them again letting them catch their breath, y/n starts laughing “i forget how hard that song is towards the end” laughing with her tendou nods “its literally the last 50 seconds that get the hardest” “alright lets clean up” semi says laughing at both of their bored looks they send him. finishing up they all go to the group whove are talking among themselves. sighing as she sits y/n takes the seat next to suna, “so howd you like the songs?” she says with a smile “they were good though i only recognized the last one” he replies, “tsumu told me you started listening to us recently so i thought or well semi thought wed show off a bit with our best song being that” she says with a smile grabbing her bottle. a small smile appears on his face “oh hey tsumu told me youre like really good in your classes and i really need help in history and since we have that group project coming up do you wanna pair up?” she says setting her bottle down grabbing a bag of chips. “yeah i dont mind as long as you actually do something and i can help you study if your grade is that bad” he says. “thatd actually help me out a lot i really appreciate it” she lets a breath out. after that the two spent all lunch just talking, the conversation coming easy for both of them. hearing the bell ring y/n hugs her friends and walks with suna to their class, pairing up in the project the teacher had given them in their period. after class before y/n rushed out she passed him her number with a wink “text me for the deets foxy boy.” ‘foxy boy? suna thought to himself shaking his head texting her with a simple ‘hey its suna’ and heading home.
facts !
during lunch when suna and y/n we're talking the followed each other on twitter
semi was really touched they learned the mcr song
the 4u concert is at a small venue but no one really cares about the other groups going there
osamu and atsumu almost started fighting over the onigiri until suna said something about ushijima being right there
atsumu was watching suna and y/n talking
osamu actually really enjoyed being there during lunch
—taglist
@applekenm , @xhanjisungiex , @astronomyturtle , @sirachano0dles , @yn-tingz , @killmepls-uwu , @bakugouswh0r3
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tricewithaz · 4 years ago
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THOTS ON SHADOW AND BONE
Hello everyone! it is I, Trice, and i come with my thoughts on the Shadow and Bone show cause ive got many
I'm gonna divide this in what i liked, what i disliked, and what i think could have been better but didn't really bother me. Feel free to send your opinions too!
As a whole, I really liked the show and I think it's a great adaptation that both fans and newcomers will enjoy. It's super well done! and every episode had me glued to the tv even though I knew what was going to happen.
Beware this is long
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To start,
What i liked
Mal and Alina
I never really liked Mal in the books, mainly cause he had like, nothing going on for him, and not having his pov made him no favors whatsoever. Alina's perception of him was everychanging, two factors that didn't make him unlikeable necessarily, but that made me not want to read about him. In the show he's way more likeable and even though he still doesn't have a lot going on for him, you can see that he's always trying to protect alina, and you also see a bit of his demeanor through Archie's acting. I think he made a great job at portraying him. And Alina! Alina who in the books was essentially a y/n sort of character (although she did get better over time), her character, likes, dislikes, her DRIVE was incredibly portrayed in the show. Also Jessie (loml, marry me) and Archie have incredible chemistry together and they sold their yearning SO WELL (and so did the kid actors portraying them as children oh my GOD)...yall...i cried when they held hands. My favourite scene was definitely when Alina took care of Mal's wounds (a favorite trope of mine). And the HURT in their eyes whenever they thought the other was in danger....i saw the show dubbed but I'm sure their voices made it beyond incredible as well, their face acting was just on. point. Overall the show rEALLY makes me root for them both individually and together which is something the books didn't manage to do.
The Darkling
AAAAA i really enjoyed the Darkling omg, incredible charisma, Ben does such a great job (and so did his voice actor in Spanish oh my GOD). His acting was just as I imagined it in the books and i loved how he could be as sweet and mysterious as he could be menacing. In fact! i liked him more than i did in the book, and i think it was a great choice to make him more human. I'm not sure if this was Ben or the writing, but i could really see his yearning for an equal, for Alina, his loneliness and his thirst for power and control too. Great love interest, even greater villain. And his wardrobe was phenomenal. I also really liked how they implied that The Darkling was a name given by other people, it was very believable that people would call someone who literally controls shade something akin to "son of the dark" or something of the sort, instead of it being a name he gives himself or his job title (both if which are incredibly pathetic and cringy to think about).
Jesper
No comments. He was just great. I love Kit.
Nina
Omg Danielle did SUCH a great job at portraying Nina, it's exactly how i imagined her in Six of Crows.
Helnik
THE. YEARNING. THE. CHEMISTRY. I didn't love their scenes at the boat but once that was over I was practically screaming at the screen to jUST KISS ALREADY. Calahan and Daniell have such good chemistry together and the few changes they made only served the story better. I did wish they had development over more time cause Matthias' change of mind felt too quick, but i get why they had to rush. Because of how good their chemistry was, their fallout also was incredibly painful.
Inej's fear of the Menagerie and her morals
Amita's portrayal of Inej's hurt, devotion and her refusal to kill (and later hurt cause she has killed) is incredibly subtle but so SO effective. She's so talented really and truly sold Inej's feelings throughout the show.
VFX
Man.....the fold, the volcra, the grisha powers.....kudos to the animators and overall artistic team cause they were incredible. Also seeing the different title animations in each episode was such a tiny detail that made me so excited and they all looked so good.
Ketterdam
Again, kudos to the artistic team, everything about Ketterdam felt so alive (and weirdly moist), truly sold a kind of aesthetic and life that is so characteristic if the Barrel, even when i didn't imagine it that way in the books.
David
He appeared like, twice, and both times were so cute and charming I can't wait to see more of him both on his own and with Genya.
The Wardrobe
So, at first i hated the keftas. I thought the looked tacky and costume, but when you see them on screen they're just perfect (although i have to say the patterns on some of the keftas were kind of...cheap looking? and the training keftas were just kinda boring. My favourite was the Darkling's. Aside from that, i really liked Kaz's and inej's clothes too. Very distinctive and recognizable (although it was kind of weird seeing Inej in teal instead of purple lmao).
And the queen's dresses. Chefs kiss.
It's...so cheesy (affectionate)
The whole show felt like the kind of movies I would watch as a kid like Harry Potter and Pirates of the Caribbean. The writing was stylized enough to make it incredibly dramatic and overall there was just so much heart behind all of it. Definetely a show to watch again and again and feel all of it, cause that's what it being so cheesy managed, to make me actually feel for it. It feels like something to watch on a rainy afternoon after a bad day....it's great okay i really enjoyed it, even (specially) the most unbelievable parts of it. And here's the thing, it's something that i think a lot of newer tv and film have lost, so this is good.
What i didn't like
Zoya
Mostly cause of the writing. Originally, in the first book, i didn't like her, neither as a character (stereotypical mean girl with no other motivation than to bang the love interests....all three of them....what's new i still think it's an incredibly sexist trope) or a person (hey at least this was intentional), but over time i grew to LOVE her (mean girl turns out to have a good heart and actually respects the mc and decides to fight alongside her cause it's what's right, without necessarily liking her or giving up her character??? AND she has strong motivations??? now THAT'S new). In the show, i hoped they would keep her mean girl nature while foreshadowing her depth, but all they did was turn her into a petty seductress with barely any screentime, and that only makes her not even a bad antagonist but just a boring character to watch. Not only that but they took away a big part of her character that needed to be developed in the next books. I wanted to watch her rivalry with Alina, her unjustified venomous tongue too, I wanted to be entertained by her and I wasn't. This was also a problem cause when she finally changed teams, and when she hugged Alina, it was incredibly unsatisfying, it would have had a way stronger effect if we had seen her being Ruthless Zoya with a big ambition. I also didn't like how we were told that she didn't like alina, or that she had a family, instead of it being shown on screen. Just from the show, all i can tell you about her is that she likes to bang people and she has a good moral code i guess. Yall, I'm so petty about this.
Kaz
So, I didn't hate him, in fact i think I would have enjoyed him if I hadn't read the books first, cause the two things that bother me about him were two essential characteristics of him in the books. FIrstly, he seems so strained, instead of the seemingly laid back, almost chill looking (even though we know he's not chill at all) Kaz we see in the books, the Kaz that always knows something that you don't. Show Kaz doesn't seem to always be in control, to always have the last word, the last laugh. Instead he seems strained, all the damn time. And I think this is mainly a writing and directing issue. And he also seems weak, something Book Kaz would never do. This is also an issue cause because he doesn't have the same presence he has in the books, the times where he is weak, don't seem as effective. Sure, Pekka Rollins has essentially reduced him and humiliated him, but I haven't seen enough of Kaz being actually dangerous for this to be shocking and for Pekka to seem even more hateable (and, i really liked Pekka, loved him as an antagonist more than i did in the books). Idk, Kaz was so charismatic and just fun and engaging to read in the books that his portrayal in the show felt lacking.
Alina's power's VFX
The little suns were cute and all but the light coming from within her was just ugly I'm sorry.
SFX
A lot of the sound design was just too stylized for the tone of the show i think. I particularly remember the sound of Mal's punches....what's that about.
What i think could have been better, but didn't particularly dislike
The Crows' storyline
And i think part of this is a consequence of Kaz not being as witty as he was in the books. Where's the incredibly complicated heist moves? the even more unbelievable C and D plans when something goes wrong? I didn't like that them getting Alina was essentially just luck, cause i didn't see enough of them being smart and quick on their feet. I also think it was unnecessary to have their storyline mixed with Alina's, i would have enjoyed watching a different heist, maybe in Ravka as well, and them incidentally crossing paths with Alina, more than i liked this storyline. ironically enough, the heist was the part i was least interested in
Genya and Alina
I just feel like her relationship with Alina wasn't strong enough, and i think it's because the show tried to make us believe they were much closer than they were without spending the necessary time in them.
Overall, I really really enjoyed the show, i will be watching it again (particularly cause i want to watch it in English) and i cannot wait for the second season omg (although i have to say, I'm scared for Nikolai)
I think that's all! I would also love to read yall's opinions and have a conversation.
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suchalonelysunflower · 3 years ago
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Sunny!!!! Ive been HOOKED to the Where The Roses Bloom and Where The Storm Gather series, I started yesterday and I couldn't stop reading, I truly love yn's relationships with everyone and youre such an amazing writer I just cant help but to fall in love with them even more 😍🥺
I do have a question, though. It says in the second book that Calum shaved his head, but I always imagines him with shaved head in the first book, are there any specific looks for the boys? Just so I can imagine them better in my head 🥺
You are truly so talented, I can't wait for the next chapter! 😍😍😍
I fucking love you 🥺💕 You truly made my day! Thank you so much for reading, I was afraid people didn’t like the story anymore, but this just made me so fucking happy 🥺😭🥰
And to answer your question: Yes, in my head each boy has a different look for each book, but then again that’s just my interpretation and the reader can view them as they want as well. But as the writer, each look has a meaning and let me explain why (and just imagine them in period clothing, I do not go as far with my editing skills.
Calum: We start book one with the famous curly hair/prince era and I always imagined him like that. Yet once they had to flee they needed to change so they don’t get recognized easily, hence the start of buzz cut stable lad calum. When it comes to his body, he was always buff but now with the training it’s more obvious.
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Ashton: Ashton has the classic prince look in book one, always secure of himself and a bit messy as well with the curls. In book two, however, his looks change dramatically since he’s been locked up: his hair is up to his shoulders and he has a beard. Not to mention he lost weight and it’s very weak. And since there’s no pictures of Ashton looking like that, you’ll just have to use your imagination
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Michael: He’s the one that’s been through the least changes when it comes to appearances. He’s obviously matured from book one to the second one, but nothing too major other than the length of his hair. I always imagined Michael with Mr. Whickman’s hair from P&P, long and well kept in a low ponytail and also in his natural color
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Luke: this one’s my favorite 🥺 You see, Luke is always described with an “angel look” to him, which is pretty accurate. On book one he’s described with long, curly hair and broad shoulders and a baby face. In book two we can see him mature into his looks with shorter hair, a sharper face, a beard and an overall King-like image. After his last encounter with King Richard, he thought it was time that people stop seeing him as a kid and more like their King
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And that’s pretty much it 🥺💕 I do have different aesthetics for each character as well (including y/n and Richard and Jack) but I can only post so much without this site banning me for no reason 😅
Thank you so much for reading the stories they tell and for bringing back the energy I needed to keep writing it 🥺💕
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clumsyclifford · 3 years ago
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just finished writing this and realized how long it got oh jeez i am so sorry. i promise it is just me rambling about nothing and does not require a lot of thought.
i made a playlist of r5's entire discography and am listening to it (in order) because there is something wrong with me. if only it had their very first ever ep on it (ready set rock ep you may have been slight garbage but i don't love you any less for it). oh god i realized i fucked up and didn't add the songs by "ross lynch and r5" from the austin & ally soundtrack. i'm already three songs into louder and they would have been between louder and say you'll stay. what do i have to do is actually one of r5's best songs and i'm pretty sure i remember ross calling it one of his favs fairly recently?? which was so valid of him. anyways. this is now an r5 song ranking. i'm bored and avoiding doing assignments. i'm going to name my top 10 r5 songs off the top of my head. source: me trying to remember every song they've ever released.
no. 1: easy love. nothing comes close. my fav song they ever made. they haven't made anything that even compares since (this is /hj. tde has some valid songs).
no. 2: wishing i was 23. what do you mean i only love this song because of my nostalgia bias no i don't.
no. 3: what do i have to do? i will not elaborate i do not know why i adore this song as much as i do it's just a cute song.
no. 4: repeating days. THE END. THE FUCKING END AFTER THE SONG ENDS THE "all i've got is cheap wine" PART ross sounds so vulnerable and him with just the guitar makes me so :(((((( it's so gorgeous that part makes the whole song and that makes it top 3 for me.
no. 5: i want u bad. THAT SONG FUCKS LIVE. I DO NOT WANT TO THINK ABOUT THE FACT THAT I WILL PROBABLY NEVER SEE IT LIVE AGAIN. (speaking of concerts i can't believe you bought concert tix and fucking forgot??? that is actually so fucking funny bella it made me laugh i will not lie)
no. 6: dark side. so so valid of them. it just fucks. it's so good. it makes u want to dance. u named a fic after a lyric from it which was so valid.
no. 7: did you have your fun? i love this song. no i will not elaborate. it is a sexy song. what's that one lyric from it that's hot. "love me, leave me, left me numb" some lyrics you love for no particular reason and for me that's one of those lyrics.
no. 8: f.e.e.l.g.o.o.d. this has alwayysss been one of my favs by them. since it dropped. some lore about it: the like crowd yelling that's in it they recorded live at a festival they played and i remember there being hype about this being an unreleased song when they had the crowd chanting "f-e-e-l-g-o-o-d" with no explanation. also another fun fact is that the final version of this is just a demo?? source: my slightly faulty memory remembering ross saying something about some demos being so good that you keep them as they are and it later being revealed this was the song he was talking about.
no. 9: i know you got away. sexy song. they released a vocals only version of it (that has apparently since been deleted?? i went to look for it on youtube and couldn't find it?? wtf r5) that has stuck with me ever since.
no. 10: loud. but more specifically the acoustic or live version. this was their encore song that they played to end every show. i MISS IT. it holds a special place in my heart.
honorable mentions: hurts good (a good song and THEIR LAST THEY EVER RELEASED VV SAD), wild hearts (fun fact almost picked a lyric from this song as my senior quote till i found out they didn't write this song), fallin' for you (YOU LIKE MISMATCHED SOCKS WITH POLKA DOTS YOU LIKE YOUR PIZZA COLD I THINK THATS HOT i never saw this song live and i'm still fucking pissed about it ok), do it again (it's such a sweet song :(((( "listen to the airplanes as we count the stars" gives me the same vibes as six feet under the stars), things are looking up (generally just a cute song!! this whole ep is just very good and very cute!! when i saw it live one time during the bridge ross was like "everyone shut up this is my favorite part >:(" and that was so valid of him) i can't say i'm in love (it's just a fun song!! it was a bonus track on sln from another country), trading time (this is the only song from the new addictions ep that i listed and u know what i'm Not sorry)
ok. i will spare you and stop rambling. other honorable mentions: if you have never listened to cool girl (feat. the driver era) by new beat fund i highly recommend. it's an okay song but it was one of the first songs released after they rebranded as tde and includes ross saying motherfucker with his whole chest. i will never again feel what i felt the first time i heard that song having listened exclusively to them as r5 whose songs they couldn't curse in because they were on a disney label.
in conclusion. i miss r5. ross saying fuck is kinda hot. i listened to the entirety of louder while writing this. i am sorry to dump this in your askbox. i still have multiple assignments to do and should probably go to sleep at a decent time. it feels fitting to finally stop writing while easy love is on. when i was 12 and this ep came out i thought "dirtbags" was a curse word and was scared to sing it. they changed it to "douchebags" live.
that's all. goodbye. have a lovely night. listen to r5's discography for clear skin thriving crops etc etc. sorry to lovepost about them in your askbox i only have (1) former r5 mutual that i still talk to (a very interesting but long story. she's the gemini bestie) and she will only lovepost about r5 once in a while. feel free to ignore my ask calling cody bellinger hot i was a different person when i wrote it i am now a changed woman. LOVE YOU MWAH - bella but she misses r5
hi hi im going to answer this with minimal thought because im tired but i dont wanna leave this sitting in my inbox forever but for the record all your r5 opinions are valid. ok lets go
1. easy love slaps ive heard it a couple times over the last few days (it played in the car today while i was driving sam n meghna to the airport) and it does fuck i can see why it's your fave
2. i do not know this song
3. A BOP A WHOLE FUCKIN BOP
4. oh i do love repeating days great choice i would have to hear it a few more times to get it in my head but i remember really liking it when i listened to the album it's on
5. also a banger and i'm glad my concert tickets situation made you laugh it made me laugh too imagine being this useless gldskfjgs
6. DARK SIDE FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS GIVE IN TO YOUR DARK SIDE YOUR DARK SIDE IIIIIIIII SEE THE WAY YOU LOOK AT MEEEEE
7. ANOTHER FUCKING BANGER this one is probably among my favorite r5 songs maybe top 5 LOVE ME LEAVE ME LEFT ME NUMB (guitar moment) DID YOU HAVE YOUR FUUUuuuuUUUUUNNNNN i feel the same way about this lyric as you
8. oh shit thats pretty cool i dont know this song tbh i cant remember how it goes i know ive heard it once or twice but. id have to listen to it again so i will keep you posted on that
9. i do not know this one either
10. interesting choice for top ten but i support you, this song fucks and ever since you mentioned it it's been in my subconscious and randomly getting stuck in my head i think i need to listen to it to get it out. it does hit ur right
11. i don't know hurts good or wild hearts or things are looking up or i can't say i'm in love or trading time well enough to say anything about them. but i really like fallin for you it's one of those cheap fun songs but emphasis on fun, and also really like do it again one day ill write a fic based on that song
i have not listened to cool girl i put it on my to listen playlist so hopefully i remember to listen to it soon ill be honest though i dont think im prepared for ross lynch saying motherfucker w his whole chest like i think itll take me out. so. anyway. i hope you got your assignments done. thank you for the r5 lovedump feel free to drop in anytime with more
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