#but its not my current focus soooo

[tulipsnflowers]

I want all of you to know you can just, send an ask about my theories for anything nexomon and I'll go on forever.

Anything from like, "Ghosts? " to "What do you think of [thing in game]? " absolutely all headcanons

Might make this my new pinned sorry Deena I crave rambling

-

Featured Designs:

Metta many forms design

Omnikids Tyrant form redesign

-

Ghost type and Deena insanity ahead! ^^

[rosykims]

i dont like the idea of everything being linked to the fade or the elves and mages etc etc and i think ive said that several times atp. but yknow what i DO want linked to everything? the deep roads actually. and im being serious abt that

[vitiateoriginator]

This past week I lost all motivation to draw

But it's cool, its cool. I'm getting back on the horse and sketching some art fight attacks again. I'm still on track to make my personal goal I think. Even if I don't make it I'm still having fun! This year really feels more active and alive on the site than the others I've participated in so far, its great!

[rocaillefox]

oh yknow i think a very fun character would be like. one who doesnt search out revenge but will absolutely take it if given the opportunity. like its no skin off their back if they never get the chance to take revenge/fulfill a grudge, thats not their goal, but its not out of mercy or kindness, just a pragmatic 'i wont let this potential revenge destroy me in the process' approach to it. might have to include them as an oc in something 🤔

[hyewka]

or can u suggest any txt fic here (preferably the long ones w chapters) that u enjoyed?

sorry for the extremely extremely late reply but i’ll list some long fics + txt series’s that ive enjoyed with some comments attached to each one. spoiler alert, a completed txt series is pretty hard to find lol

series

lover = lo$er (sub!gyu, virgin fic)

it would be easy to just straight up recommend every @/wildernessuntothemselves series and i might just succumb to that later on but this is pure submissive beomgyu heaven, served as my first real awakening and i would probably attribute most of my sub gyu writing to this fic alone. 10/10, has a love triangle bit and beomgyus kind of insane

criminal conscience (dom!gyu, crime au)

on the other side of the spectrum, this is pussy clenching dom beomgyu goodness and i dont think it gets better than this. the writing is so compelling it fully immerses you in the narrative, even im getting sucked in to beomgyu’s manipulation (whats new really), blaring red flags and all. its currently on hiatus though but i would catch up either way beomiracles is a pretty consistent writer, she’d probably pick it up sooner or later :)

mosquito (soobin)

sorry this is going to be all over the place lol but this is also still ongoing (its only two parts in) but this writer is absolutely insane. narrative feels fleshed out and though it mainly follows soobin’s perspective and feelings, i am quite enjoying it so far. it has some idol x idol action as well, not the main focus of course but it is written in detail

one way (dom!beomgyu, themes of sadism)

this ones a three parter and its completed. by the same writer mentioned previously (soobrat), very very good storytelling, keeps you on your toes and has a hold on your emotions but like mentioned, it has a bit of an extremity in the smut and it is undeniably toxic but its good

sneaky link (dom yeonjun, the other woman trope)

i havent read this in a while but i remember staying up all night reading all of it lol. i would probably not recommend this to people who really cant read infidelity since thats what the fic is based around but it isnt cast in a very favorable light anyway. really toxic, seriously good

fuck you series (sub gyu, enemies to lovers, band au)

its really cute and the e2l set up is believable enough since theyre band rivals. beomgyu is so so so cute in this even if a little insufferable to mc lol. i would also recommend fairyofshampgyu’s now live series but its currently on an indefinite hiatus (its sooo good as well though so if youre willing, you should check it out)

nabi (best friends to lovers beomgyu, no smut)

two parts in, not completed but im following it currently and god i love them together their dynamic is soooo fun to read, you wont get bored

jerk! (enemies to lovers, beomgyu fic, no smut)

its another band au and its also ongoing. there isnt a consistent update schedule so that might be a minus but the most recent chapter was from a month ago so its safe to say it hasnt been left in the dust (thank god). very very good writing, excited to see how their relationship takes off

bullying choi soobin (sub soobin)

submissive soobin and its good, of course im recommending this. its finished and a 4 parter

sugar (dom!yeonjun, dom!gyu)

unfortunately probably forever incomplete but i love it and i might actually go back to reading it for the third time

let me into your world (non smut beomgyu series)

i havent read a soulmate premise in sooo long so this was refreshing to read, good stuff

supermodel (dom gyu and sub i believe)

its just. Amazing. a two parter but a goodie

the city that never sleeps (bsf smut)

also two parts but both parts are pretty long, really good stuff

ok for the life of me i cannot find this one huening series where he was getting bullied by reader and they were secretly fucking?? that one was literally perfect submissive men shit so if you find it if youve struck gold

long full fics (6k+)

telepathy (fantasy, dom!gyu)

a little out of the box compared to all the fics ive recommended so far and thats what makes it so special and good

duality (dom!kai)

i actually havent read this one yet but i will soon, i just thought id add it here anyway since i know ill love it

killer instinct (taehyun fic)

very plot heavy and it centers taehyun mainly. i could go ahead and cheat and just list out every single koqabear fic lmao but this ones a gem, very happy i set aside the time to read it

the redemption of choi yeonjun (dom!yj)

im not personally a fan of the trope but when it was originally teased the smut sounded heavenly and honestly, it is. such a good dom yeonjun here but beware hes a little (a lot) mean lol. he changes by the end

like cat and mouse! (sub gyu, inexperienced)

again, worth the reading time investment. i love submissive gyu, he is everything here and more

love love love (sub gyu, royal au)

i have probably read this a total of 30 times

i hate you (enemy!beomgyu, dom beomgyu)

ok sorry im cheating here a bit this isnt long but its so good you should check it out anyway

[crossbowwwdotcom]

camilo's bllk fic reccs pt 2 (as of december 24, 2024):

- are we dancing after death? by calmgeyama ... 9.5k words and 1/1 chapters. read tags! gantz tabiori au where they all die and have to fight monsters to continue living... so terrifyingly written!!

- laced drill bits to my pointe shoes by ethereally ... 4k words and 1/1 chapters. kunigiri as old men fighting for their right to be married in jp. GREAT formatting and story and i love this so much

- conception by missiletoe .., 1.8k words and 1/1 chapters. egonoa character study pre-blue lock. its cute and short and they are just so Interesting.

- never let you come apart by ethereally ... 9k words and 1/1 chapters. i cant believe i almost forgot this one omfg. its so good! bachisagi fic set post canon with aroace isagi again. i fw it so much ughhh

- the sweetest flower by lockedskies ... 20k words and 5/? chapters. allsagi bachelor au!!! all the interactions between everyone is so good. i never realized how interesting the bachelor au could be...

- what we stand to win by raindrops_0 ... 6k words and 1/1 chapters. gen fic centered around isagi when theyre starting at bastard munchen. its just great hurt/comfort with some very relatable themes. love!

- GHOST OPERATIVES by shiryurealest13 ... 41.5k words and 23/30 chapters (chapter cap fluctuates). read tags! chatfic and still currently updating. not central focus but rinsagi, shidousae, nagireo, and tabieita. its about part of the bllk cast who are assasins are given the mission to kill reos dad and have to infiltrate reos fg (the rest of bllk) to get close to him. SO funny and the plot is actually so engaging. someone pls talk to me ab this its one of my favs rn 😭

- finding passion by strawberrytiramisu3773 ... 100k and 11/? chapters. read tags! VERY interesting canon divergence rewrite! i fear im a huge angst and whump fan and reading this was soooo good for me lol

- spoiled by vett .. 5k words and 1/1 chapters. rinsagi future fic that had me GIGGLING OMG. rin being a clingy drunk and isagi being so embarrased was so funny and i was literally freaking out lol. second hand embarrassment almost killed me but its ok!

- the language of losing by raindrops_0 ... 10.4k and 2/3 chapters. socmed kaisagi fic staged in the nel where each team gets more of a social media presence. im such a sucker for socmed fics and this one is so funny lol

- three is a charm by mistresssleepless ... 6k words and 1/1 chapters. ahhhhh i love bachirinsagi and this was so good. them having sex is referenced a lot but it isnt explicitly written (still teen+ though). theyre so cute together and i love these three together

- six facts about lobsters by smallghosts ... 3.7k words and 1/1 chapters. bachisagi kinda character study fic written from second person pov. one of the most well written things ive ever read

- fixation by celestee (jenjaemrens) ... 5k words and 1/1 chapters. rinsagi fic where isagi lives in spain and is part of re al with sae. SUCH a cool concept and im so obsessed with it

- good luck rin! by cyberialyr1 ... 60k words and 12/18 chapters. rinsagi highschool au where isagi is the new kid and rins the football team captain. very cute with internalized homophobia and angsty backstory isagi! i havent caught up since like ch9 though but its really good

- like glass from sandy ground by ethereally ... 7k words and 1/1 chapters. such a GOOD bachisagi ff where isagi is aroace but loves bachira and bachira loves him anf theyre just. struggling to figure things out. wonderfully written to portray the love of someone aroace! if ure gonna read anything on this list then read this one Please

- oat milk (and other irredeemable vices) by caluette .., 26k words and 3/3 chapters. kaisagi coffee shop au where kaiser is the frustrating customer with a long and specific order and isagi is a struggling employee. banter and light hearted enemies to lovers!

- of intrusive thoughts and sickly sweet smiles by zhiruiii ... 14k words and 4/4 chapters. soft rinsagi with isagi being a social butterfly and rin being insecure about it. cute!!!

- pretrichor by flowersforaliens... 3k words and 1/1 chapters. i LOVE. karasu centric angst fic with tabiori about karasu having an injury and having to retire. so good!

- i cant stay on your morphine (cause its making me ill) by witchcoded ... 22k words and 4/6 chapters. FEM LESBIANS ryurin!!!! perhaps the best??? the emotional constipation of rin is so good and the intimacy of them is so well written (or^o). great side roles too!

- to lose yourself in the world by thecurrator .. 25k words and 21/? chapters. egonoa fic where ego is a daycare worker, noa is his roommate, and bllk are the kids. so funny and pretty fluffy!

- art of momentum by illicitly ... 4.9k words and 1/1 chapters. cute little nagireo oneshot w nagi being protective!

- kintsukoroi by laylayli ... 54k and 3/3 chapters. read tags! kaisagi fic set after nel where kaiser finds out his dad is dead. lots of interesting grieving and well-written character study! loved this and i swear by this author

- maybe it was ego swinging by sopenation ... 3k words and 1/1 chapters. kunigiri w protective bllk and kunigami over chigiri. yk i love to see it!

- invincible like ive never been by mkat1020 ... 2k and 1/1 chapters. gen and chigiri whump during the u20. i looooove this one and isagi is such a good friend in this and its just. Good

- love you like oxygen by sweetdreamers... 12k and 1/1 chapters. kaisagi breakup and makeup fic. they have a generally toxic relationship and isagi is super sad and pathetic in this but the rest of the bllk cast comforts him and they figure shit out

- l'amour est bleu by laylayli ... 40k words and 5/5 chapters. perhaps my FAVORITE kaisagi ff and one of my fav bllk fics oat. its about isagi starting to babysit for kaisers younger sister and them falling in love during it. isagi just cares so much for kaisers younger sister and kaiser slowly starts loving him so much for it and isagi cant help but fall for kaiser its just. so endearing and i love it <3.

- world class hypocrite by aashimar ... 80.5k words and 9/10 chapters (EPILOGUE PLEASE PLEASE UPLOAD). read tags! explicit sex scenes throughout but its staged post-canon. this fic made me SICK. rinsagi au where isagi was outed as gay by rin before the wc and his life was basically ruined afterwards. the LONGING and RESENTMENT in this is the absolute peak of society. both rin and isagis characters are written so amazingly like theyre so flawed and theyre very messy people but theyre like really actually in love with each other. they say a lot of fucked up shit to each other but i still swear by this fic! the plot was SO SO intriguing and the way its written is really realistic. the chemistry is absolutely INSANE in this fic. my personal fav bllk fic and one of my fav fics ever! belongs in the hof tbh

see pt 1 here!

[vivisviolets]

˗ˏˋ ꒰ 💬 "what happened to hello- how are you?- my name is- what happened to that?-"💬 ꒱ ˎˊ˗ ⋅☆⋅Who's in your energy?⋅☆⋅

★ and whyyyyyy???

⋅☆⋅ pick the sketch-a-roonie you feel most *drawn* to~ whichever your eyes landed on first, the colors you like most, which aligns with your personality- etc etc!!! ask God/Spirit/higher self if you need more clarification or you are unsure, and feel free to pick more then one- or all of the piles as you may have needed messages scattered throughout!!! last thingy before we start~: remember you are deserving of good things and all that you desire and dream of- no matter where you are in life or how capable/deserving of what you want for your life, you are always deserving- and there is nothing wrong with growing along with having your desires!!!!!! that's beautifullll- srry felt like someone needed to hear that (maybe just me lol) okieee enjoyyy ♡♡♡♡ ⋅☆⋅

˗ˏˋ ꒰ 💬 ꒱ ˎˊ˗ pile 1

⋅☆⋅☆⋅☆⋅

⋅☆⋅ The Hermit, The Fool (reversed), The Sun (reversed), Eight of Swords (bottom of deck) ⋅☆⋅

⋅☆⋅ -(slight 18+ cw)- "independent freak- 7 days a week-" (WHAT 😭), girl boss/boss energy, intellectual attraction, fire placements, air placements, Sagittarius/Pisces/Aquarius placements, Mars ruled, Jupiter ruled, 1212, -Youtuber- Anita Sirene ⋅☆⋅

⋅☆⋅ lolll cards slip sliding everywhere~ we love, we love that~ Hi pile 1s!! Ok OOFH- these cards hon... Looking at them I feel like contributing them to whoever's been around you... But I can't be sure quite yet because I want to focus on you first as much as I can- so we'll discover/uncover if these cards are about you or the energy of others. So I'm hearing you may be new to tarot actually, whether that's reading the cards yourself or looking at tarot-related content (hiiii👋), or for one or two of you- you are not new to tarot, but there is now something different you're doing. A new approach, or you coming at that aspect of your divination differently- but for both of my new and old card seekers/readers you are using tarot in regards to this situation you are currently in... some unsteady/shaken up feelings about your love life...- I'm seeing Anita Sirene so you may be recent viewers/fans of her content and are really aligned with her energy- I'm trying to remember her star sign/placements I think she's a Sagittarius or has other fire placements- you might also be ruled by Mars or Jupiter. You have a very grounded, masculine energy to you- you also possess such an intellectual drive (sharp/curious I'm hearing).

...Along with the energetic alignment of your drive- I'm hearing your sex drive might be significant in your life, a little 18+ cw for the next few sentences- you are very knowledgeable in self-pleasure,- but you particularly like sharing that drive of yours with another person. Someone who you have looked into, and you align with intellectually <--- that is very important to you in a partner, including who you hook up with- I'm also feeling really independent energy from you, I'm hearing you're very "in charge" and "on-top" of pretty much every aspect of your life- and people describe you with those exact phrases, both negatively and positively... I'm hearing a lot of different men/masculine/divine masculine figures talking about you, these are a lot of past people, past bosses, and partners- someone's a doctor or a surgeon... Some of these masc figures were really triggered by how divine your energy is because you made them realize how underdeveloped their masculinity was, and soooo- they mad at you... Still. 😭 omg- they are so bitter, whiny, pathetic-... small. You have 5'10 energy and they are teensy tiny in comparison BAHAHA (that's for my afabs- for my amab its like 6'6 energy,, 💀 damnnn)- but yea these "men" that you rightfully left in the past (kicked out of your temple and on the curb I'm hearing) are still talking shit about you, calling you "cold"-"too busy"-"self-absorbed", calling you a b!t@h- just laugh my dear darling. Just laughhh because they are just proving your reason for cutting them out of YOUR life correct and justified to anyone with eyes lol...

They are so ick- major ick, because they talk so much bullshit but it's so clear they're just butt hurt that you don't take them to bed anymore 18+ cw they can crudely call you a "freak" all they want with their drinking buddies, it's sooooooo obvious (it's almost pitiful)- how much they miss sex with you... They miss what you would do and how you would do it-... I've been hearing Pisces placements for a bit (Pisces degrees, Pisces rising, Pisces 8h?) so they also regret not being able/given the golden opportunity to unlock true intimacy with you-... Damn, I need to end this interview full of bullshit that I've been having with your ex-partners. Lolll moving onnn- wrapping it up, they're mad that you leveled up and they couldn't upgrade with you boohoo ah well that's 👏life👏 it's not high school anymore. -Anyways, these past bosses- there is one bad egg and I congratulate you on leaving that environment and I will say no more regarding that~ your other past bosses or bosses you have known however? Glowing reviews. They literally miss you... I don't think there was any affair going on- but I mean take it if it resonates ofc BAHAHOO- but for most of you, they miss how much of a breath of fresh air you were for them in the work/business environment- because they finally found someone who fully aligned with them professionally and responsibility wise- doesn't matter what position you held at the time, as soon as you spoke and showed your capabilities and your mind to them they respected you- you surprised them and they literally recount what you were like to work with- with a twinkle in their eye. Because you knew how to be exactly what you needed to be professionally and be yourself- you are a perfect balance of interacting with connections in a business environment, and adding your fiery flare to it that leaves everyone seeing you as a centerpiece in the workplace/branch- you may dress really nicely too, and add something funky to your business style (big glasses, a pop of color, basics with a patterned piece, etc) so that makes you even more memorable-

You are completely your own person/woman/man, like... Have I told you how much I admire you yet-? Like not to place you on a pedestal but holy shit have you built your own life- not to get into your background rn or anything but fr you have been a builder of yourself and your reality from the start. No matter what you have gone through, you have really transformed and grown strong enough to wield that potential for yourself... So yea!! Really proud of you- I just felt channeled to say that and you fully deserve to hear it and be compensated for all that growth you did for yourself ❤️.~ One last thing before I leave your leopard print patterned energy (that resonates for someone here I know it 😭)- you are looking for a potential life partner, a commitment. Commitment is a keyword for you, you know exactly what your needs are in a life partnership. And I'm so happy to see you are open to finding that. Because I am hearing you struggle with an avoidant-attachment style... And a few self-destructive traits in regards to choosing partners who are of a lower vibration to you- but you're really starting to heal and look at those parts of you, choosing yourself- you guys are into astrology so I see you like to go after Capricorns, and a recent connection might have been a Capricorn/had Capricorn placements- but was underdeveloped and really screwed with you... You wanted them to be the one but they couldn't live up to that and that really triggered their immaturity- that's not your fault, they just weren't the one... And so I want to move on to where you will meet the one~ ...You have not met this person yet (except for a few of you who are literally set to be engaged/are married already to this person omg)- and at this time they seem like some faraway dream... And they are in a way, energetically/physically- they are far away at this time. But they will be coming in and coming close to you in a fast period of time- like one day they're on the other side of the country, and the next they'll be on your side in your city. They will arrive in your workplace environment, or even at church (your place of religious/spiritual worship)- I see you being introduced with maybe one to two other people around you that you already know in this environment. Things will be very cordial, there'll be eye contact and a handshake, maybe even a casual joke on your end and it'll make their eyes twinkle- they are either the same age as you or older, and you'll notice something about their hair (hairline?), and their expression on their face as they hold eye contact. Simply meeting you will cause something in them to align themselves to your vibration- which is what will later down the line be so different, this mutual alignment to each other and this person desiring to be on your level. It may not feel or be described as "love at first sight" but instead a mutual shift that will flow you both to a true life commitment ❤️~. Ok my dear darlings ⭐️, as you can see- you will meet someone to share a commitment with and build with- as I channeled all of that so easily. I'll end it here and if you're curious about more details on your FS then just search for another pac because I have faith that the first one you will be drawn to will give you the most important details for you to know at this time~ paint your toes and have a night in wearing your fluffiest robe with some mood lighting ❤️❤️❤️~.

⋅☆⋅

˗ˏˋ ꒰ 💬 ꒱ ˎˊ˗ pile 2

⋅☆⋅☆⋅☆⋅

⋅☆⋅ Knight of Pentacles, Page of Wands (reversed), The Tower, The Devil (reversed) (bottom of deck) ⋅☆⋅

⋅☆⋅ Blossom (Powerpuff Girls), "lover girl" ("lover boy"/"lover"), any element placements, Taurus/Cancer/Virgo/Aries/Libra/Gemini/Aquarius, 1212, 12:34(pm/am), 111, hoodies/loungewear, dms, the library, book lover, aesthetic reads, romance, "my first (x)", pink/purple/green/white/cream, -Youtuber- deb smikle ⋅☆⋅

⋅☆⋅ You like Lana Del Rey, and you're in/and or back in your Ultraviolence era- and you heavily identify with the "lover girl"/"lover boy"/"lover" archetype. "That's it." I'm hearing spirit saying 😭, ok respect 👏!! Hi Pile 2s!! You are heavily in your feels (or someone might be in their feels about you and this is a shared energy), you have this grounded energy to you naturally but you have a tendency to dream away- and you are very dreamy and in a haze rn... You guys are into literature yea? Definitely book lovers and I'm seeing someone's back to me at a library bookshelf- you definitely have those aesthetic photos on your Pinterest boards. Vision boards, better habits, how you're viewed/perceived, etc 💕. I'm feeling actually a very wide range of astrology placements for this pile- the first sign I heard is Taurus (Sun or other placements), you have Aquarius vibes with how complex and well-written your dreamy side can be in viewing the world (Aquarius Moon, Mercury, etc)- but again, wide range of signs and their placements in this pile, but what you are all sharing is this situation that has your minds and hearts in a haze of dreams and musings... Okkkk come back down to earth is what you are being divinely told- but I see this going out one ear and out the other for more of your musings and haze... Ouch!! Spirit is really warning you to get out of your own head and actually look at your surroundings with your own perspective removed just for a moment-... But I'll get to that later, I want to try and move through this sparkly, pinkish/purple fog around you and see what the cause of it is (outside of you continuing to regulate it)- Oh yea- it's a boy I knew it.<-- Change it for your situation(ship oh no-),- and I just know as I drew your cards... I knew it, your energy by nature is The Knight of Pentacles. You are responsible and outwardly mature. I'm also hearing academic- you are definitely a reader/book lover and you definitely bullet journal. But you get distracted easily... Because due to maybe being thrown into studying and academic fulfillment at a young age- you have this dreamy/romantic/emotional side to you that is underdeveloped... You also struggle then with organization- especially balancing your emotions/right brain, like when was the last time you bullet journaled for yourself??- and also wow, now I am disorganized... Don't worry my pile 2s💗!! We'll discuss more about that later, let me continue to shift through this fog towards this specific person... So you fell for a fire sign/placements person, heavily a masculine to your feminine (not gender identity specific, and take what resonates)- and they made you feel like you were discovering something new, and exciting,- and something you've always "dreamed about". "It's just like the books/the movies"- the poetry, the novels, the romcoms... They have curly hair or darker features/coloring- tall or around your height, a friend but a lover-... They ain't it, and there is something you are not seeing. <-- I could only just bring myself to finish channeling all these physical features about them before that message was pushing its way out- it's not even so much a message, it's a straight-up warning- God/Spirit/the divine is not "mad" at you per se but your guides are feeling like they have to shout at you at this point due to how lost you are choosing to become through this fog... This person (I'm getting Aries or maybe Capricorn/Sagittarius), you are viewing their traits with rose-colored glasses, and that sucks because it may feel you two are very close friends- and that tinted perspective is justified because it's "true love" (I'm hearing Frozen)...

I feel like I'm breaking your heart here and causing you a lot of doubts- but I mean,,, you are still reading- and if what I am channeling for the collective is triggering you, then that is a big golden sign- to look clearly through this romanized fog. (If you don't feel triggered then this is definitely not your pile at this time💗 pick a different one)- this person, is not the bias/vision that you have placed on them, and not in the "they're secretly a monster" way- I mean they are the embodiment of all of your own underdeveloped emotions and secrets I'm hearing- so if you try and hide an underdeveloped immaturity let's say (the developed side of immaturity would be purity/innocence)- then they embody that same immaturity... In fact, the reason why you were drawn to them, is because they remind you of your own underdeveloped traits. The unprocessed traits that you keep hidden, they express theirs openly/externally- and that really attracts you and turns you on about this person, whether you consciously realize that or not... Really it's all of those parts that you continue to be wishy-washy about that are trying to make themselves heard- by pushing your perspective into self-destruction. Ok ummm... Yea. Spirit is telling you to "play it out" for yourself- because it will teach you and cement some very deep/core understandings about yourself and really develop you... But they are still going to be shouting at you- not to trigger your anxiety but in an attempt to deliver clarity to you... Through this glitter bomb fog of sweet smells- and long glances- and poetic excerpts... You will definitely be vent/vague posting relating to them if you haven't already... 💀 I'll be so honest since I feel I've just made a whole call-out post to you- this person is just here for the ride. For the fun, the emotional energy they gain from your focus on them- they are not deep like you are. Not even close. Probably never will be tapped into their own potential depth, isn't that sad? Pathetic?- And don't you dare- I see you- don't you dare think you can "fix" them. Have "delusions" about yourself, not other people's potential actions/free will- that is delusional. That is destructive delusion. -You probably will need to completely deconstruct yourself, and you have the choice after this channeled reading to either go with Spirit allowing you this experience and then the aftermath of playing it out, or you can heed all of their warnings and go fully within yourself. Spirit is being very allowing with you- because you are so loved, divinely loved and I'm not just saying that- you are divinely loved because spirit knows all the potential you have deep inside, and they want you to dig and reach into yourself to unlock it from your depths. They don't want you to sleepwalk through your emotions or live your feelings vicariously through characters anymore- they want so viciously,- and dearly for you to have, and embody your own story... It's beginning to rain, and there are couples- and solo butterflies flying around me- go outside into nature, remove Instagram from your phone for a day, feel the warm air on your skin, and remove the layers made from characters you've read about from your being- there was nothing wrong with them, but you must become your own story at this time.

I think I'll end this right here- your pile was very different then the other 2 I read tbh because of how strong a point was made regarding inner self-work- I feel the urge to say that you are welcome to reach out/ask me regarding your situation/what you can do to begin this inner discovery,- I'll answer you briefly tapping into your alignment/energy, and I apologize for a wait time from me- but yea!!! Ok good luck my pile 2s💕 go bake some cookies or something with pink icing 💗

⋅☆⋅

˗ˏˋ ꒰ 💬 ꒱ ˎˊ˗ pile 3

⋅☆⋅☆⋅☆⋅

⋅☆⋅ The Lovers (reversed), Five of Cups (reversed), Nine of Cups (reversed), Ten of Cups (reversed) (bottom of deck), + bonus card Judgment (reversed) ⋅☆⋅

⋅☆⋅ Sunny, warm skin-warm heart, watery/emotional heart, water placements, Pisces/Cancer/Scorpio, air placement influence, medium/dark coloring, Kate Hudson energy, yellow, 333, 3030, Wattpad, crocheting, -Youtuber- BOZE ⋅☆⋅

⋅☆⋅ Oooooh Pile 3s- going into your energy I was given such imagery of sunlight and sunshine- and now I'm hearing You Are My Sunshine~ You babies are such sweethearts- like you're giving the energy of being like a childhood friend who gives the warmest and most energetic hugs no matter how old they get- it's giving 🔆💛☀️- heavily channeling certain physical features, so you may be on the shorter side, with a really cute athletic build- very evenly proportioned and so strong and full looking- take what resonances!! Somebody however does/did view you like this however, whoever you've given hugs to especially (which does not narrow it down bc you love giving hugs 😌)- in particular, someone who you have to stand on your tiptoes to embrace, with your arms around their neck... UGHHH someone is in love with you!!!!!! OR SOMETHING😭😭!!!!- I don't think that you even know, you have suspicions about it- I see some of you are neutral about the possibility of a romantic relationship with whoever this friend is- and some of you are very preoccupied with the idea of it- but both of you do love whoever this is💛. A whole- WHOLE LOT 💛💛💛 that's why the label of romantic love you may have mixed or strong feelings about because you already love this person... Some of you may have known this person since childhood- this could be a co-worker (someone here works at a grocery store🍏 or fresh food is significant)- or there's just this feeling to your connection that is connected more deeply, it's giving like- a friend that you almost have a sibling bond to, because of how familiar they feel energetically.

-omg I completely lost track of what this reading is about lollllll and also describing you as you are- bc you have someone who's heavily in your energy, and they see you so positively (got randomly spellchecked- the name Antoine might be significant to you, family/friend/familiar word.. 😭)- they have this more grounded energy to them... -take it for your situation because I am seeing for many people that this is a guy/masculine/friend, and for a few of you this is a gal/feminine friend- either way their energy balances with yours so so well, like you are the sunshine to their earth☀️ (I'm hearing the song I was hearing earlier and now the song- You Light Up My Life)... Aaaaauuuugg this person... I would not use the word obsessed to describe how they feel about you- because this energy towards you is way too pure. You have your complications as all connections like this have, and those should be addressed- but at the end of the day if you two landed on a desert island together- you'd live in absolute peace fr lol... Where was I?? Oh sht let me actually get into some different aspects of you 😭- I need to address all the reversals I got, I felt a little untrusting in the cards and wondered if I shuffled my deck wrongly- so I asked for one more reversal as confirmation, and got Judgment in freaking reverse girllllyyyyy 😭 (gn term)- so let's unpack that. Because I definitely am seeing situations in your life relating to these cards-

Something is going on within you that was triggered by those around you... -you were in a friend group/dynamic that made you feel certain negative emotions, fear, panic, or pressure? This may have been regarding someone or people with air placements- I'm hearing Gemini largely- who... I'll just say were rather cruel... But also in general it was an issue of you and them just not being a good match in the same room- you might have tried to become closer to them out of wanting to share your light with them, -and it just ended up with you becoming attached and anxious to their very up/down moods and affectionate to cold attitude... But honey I'll just say, I'm not going to completely put down this person- yes. They are a b-word (gn term 🌞✨)- but you put yourself in the pathway of their behavior. I am sure as heck not blaming you nor shaming you for trying to share your beautiful light with this person/people, but you need to recognize- your own intentions were pure in wanting to bring joy to certain people- but what about you? What is giving joy to other people, whether they deserve it or not based on their actions,- actually doing for you? It is always rewarding enough to do the right thing, to be selfless in treating everyone equally- but those acts are done right only when you do them from a place of personal protection/boundaries and self-respect. Otherwise, you're just the one pulling the weight of the ship (or the group chat I'm hearing lol)- and honey,,, that's not righteous or healthy- it's the opposite because you are not doing yourself the justice of giving your part and allowing the other person to do their part- and honey- that is what healthy group socialization is. Being yourself instead of catering and giving of yourself to everyone. Not everyone is on your level, and not everyone has to like you- that is ok. It isn't your job to fix or be everything to everyone. That is not your purpose. Your purpose is you being something that involves you giving to yourself- how giving you can be to others is a powerful and good aspect of you, but it is not you.

Wow I went off- but you need to start recognizing your own unhealthy behaviors, so you can become better and healthier for yourself in your friendships. It's reminding me a lot of some of Beach Bunny's lyrics, (no shade to her, I have overplayed all of their stuff lol) I myself didn't see it at the time, but after a lot of my own healing I started to really recognize how- people pleasing, anxious attachment style, etc, the lyrics were... And how (just speaking for the character in the lyrics, not the actual writer I don't know her) a lot of the heartbreak and drama could have been avoided if she looked at and addressed her own anxiety issues, instead of focusing on the other party in the situation... It's me, hi, I'm the problem it's me 😭 man I am channeling so much music so you might be listening to so much music for all your different emotions rn. But cereal-sly🥛- start looking at your own triggers instead of who caused them. They're responsible for their own actions, and you are responsible for your reactions to them...

I really went on and I hope I wasn't too harsh to you during this vulnerable time💛- but it is better to stop and be vulnerable, than continue on this hamster wheel. Please cut away from people at this time, more so I mean start recognizing if you feel uncomfortable when you are not constantly sharing yourself- I'm REALLY hearing you should just go ghost with some of the people in your energy- don't even worry or feel guilty about it, because true connections that are actually for your good would respect your mental health break high key- speaking of do open up and let those you trust most about what you are feeling because they care about you so much. Use your intuition instead of your anxious attachment to figure out who these true friends are, and seriously cut out the rest. No matter how triggering it may be to your anxiety, address it, comfort yourself, and heal- because once you learn this newfound respect for your emotions, you're going to shine even fuller than before, and you are going to enjoy this change as much as those who love you so so much do as well. 💛💛💛 RECOVERING PEOPLE PLEASER GANG 🙌 YOU'RE GOING TO BE HAPPIER THEN EVER 🙌 trust and believe~🔆

⋅☆⋅

☆

☆

⋅☆⋅ oh man i thought i was going to sleep 2 hours ago... one day I'll actually reward myself with a full night of sleep 💀.. blessings~!!!

⋅☆⋅ love, vi~♡

[gallaghersgal]

SUB LIP AND CARMY LAAAWRD (sorry for rambling my fault yall…)

carmen would be a whiner for sure—he’s a little embarrassed by it but not too much. to me i feel like he’d just wanna be taken care of…..no meanness or teasing just lots of praise. prefers slow grinds that make him tear up bc it’s so good. probably when he has bad days and wants to just have soft mushy gushy lovey dovey sex

now lip (slut) i feel like he rarely subs but that’s because he’s got that internalized ‘macho’ bs implanted in his brain. but when he does he’s probably bitchy saying “want me to take over? probably do it better than you 🤭” and when he stops being so bullheaded it’s all “o-oh, keep fuckin me like that, shhhit s’good”

feel like carmen would love a little edging? not a lot but…because the release is more than just physical it’s kinda emotional for him too? while lip would love overstimulation because it’d be the only thing he could focus on it’d just wipe his brain of all his current worries

oooooooooooooooo lord. oh lord. i need a cold shower.

carmen being a whiny baby is so real. i know he just wants to be taken care of after a long hard day in the kitchen, and he would be so sweet, begging you... 'please baby 's so good' 'f-fuck!' 'shit- 'm gonna come-' and its all strained and he's stuttering... he loves when you edge him, and i mean loves it, he loves to beg and beg and get pushed so close to the edge. and hes a crier, trust. he likes to feel vulnerable and soft with you.

getting lip to submit would be an... ordeal. but i think you can coax him into it. i think tying him up would be good for his giant fucking ego, once you get his ass tied down and start making him feel good he would start to let down that facade he's always putting up. he'd be squirming and begging you to untie him so he can touch you and please you. once you get him like that he would be soooo eager to please you. he would do anything to get you off, eat you out for hours and ask for nothing in return, just asking 'yeah, baby, 's good for you?' 'you can gimme another, wanna make you feel good please' 'am i makin' ya feel good? hm?' and for sure lots of 'thank you, thank you baby' when you praise him for how good he's being.

in conclusion: yes.

[thefurriestofchows]

woah psychonauts art in 2024

if u just wanna look at the art and scroll ur good to do so :] if u wanna know where i’ve been, read below!! 💖

soooo, hi!!

i know, its been awhile since you’ve properly heard from me. i’m sorry :((

i got into psychonauts near the end of HS / beginning of college, and between COVID, graduation, and all the major changes in my life, it was an amazing place to just make art i loved and explore stories with the characters i love :]

as time went on, i began to step away from here to focus more on college and my work

i also got into different things since then! Barry, HLVRAI, just to name a few

i haven’t ever forgotten my love for psychonauts, not for a second, in fact, my inspiration for coming back here was watching a play through by a new streamer i found

watching someone react to it for the first time just made me fall in love with it all over again.

and now, here we are

i graduated, and now i’m fresh in the world trying to figure out what to do with my life

I’m currently figuring out a job and all that gross adult stuff, but even now in time of great change, i’m drawn back to the world of psychonauts

now the big question — what about the riptide au?

i’ll be honest: i reread riptide, there’s parts i like, parts i didn’t, and parts i completely forgot what i was setting up for

ive matured as a writer and storyteller since riptide’s conception, and i think it needs a refresher / boost

i think you can already see that from tholomew’s design — i tweaked a few things while i was drawing it (especially his shoes oh my god i had no idea what i was doing with his shoes before)

i haven’t forgotten any of psychonauts, even as my life heads in different directions. i think, right now, i’m gonna clear out my inbox for a fresh start. if you have any questions about the new riptide au, i’ll try to answer them when i have a spare moment in my day 💖

but yeah, i’m not dead, just got so busy and caught up with life i disappeared for a bit

but here i am again! four years later

but yeah, thats about it, thank you for sticking around :]

[z0mb1epuzzy]

hii again (i sent the josh/chris with a nipple peircing request teehee, i absolutely LOVED what you did with it holyyy)

i was wondering about your thoughts on our characters with a size difference/kink? particularly with a shorter reader? (although mike with a taller reader actually makes me CRUMBLEEE because holy god, he'd be so whipped) also i apologize because none of my asks are likely to be completely gender neutral, i unconsciously write reader inserts as feminine unfortunately 😭

but in particular, mike and chris (chris hyperfixation been hitting hard because of you. it's all your fault, i say with heart eyes)

i wasnt positive if youd already done this, but i thought id ask just in casee

i imagine mike being cocky about it, but not too outwardly. he would more-so just tease you about it, but he makes sure to be gentle as well. hed think its just soooo cute when youre pressed up with your back against his chest, struggling to take just two of his fingers inside of you, you huffing a "fucking hell" in pitiful anger as you curse your genes under your breath, wanting him to just fuck you already. hed chuckle breathily into your neck, kissing the soft skin under your ear sweetly. "you know how this goes, hon. we need to get you all ready for me.. wouldnt want you to get hurt, now would we?"

chris, im a bit more uncertain how he would feel about it. i cant remember how tall he is off the top of my head, but he's taller than mike in game, isnt he? i feel like hes definitely used to people being noticeably shorter than him, almost all his friends are (if not all of them), so he's not usually very surprised when he encounters someone shorter than him. but then he meets you, standing at an almost sad 5'1", and he is WHIPPED. not even sexually, he just wants to hold you. you're like the perfect size for him to spoon and hold, and oh god- have in his lap. he would definitely, when hes sitting, pull you straight onto his thighs at any given moment - with absolutely no struggle, might i add. (i live for beefy!chris)

OMG, and do NOTTT even get me started on sex. he is basically using you to get off. after youve finally taken him inch by inch and gotten comfortable, as soon as he's close to finishing, he's gripping your hips, grinding and slamming you against him like his own personal fleshlight. he really didnt mean to be so rough. he apologizes for it after the fact, of course he does, because he really didnt mean to, you just felt so good and tight around him, and he just lost his resolve... i feel like hed forget his own strength sometimes? leaving bruises occasionally from accidentally gripping your hips too hard, or at least he gets close to it. hes just not used to having someone so much smaller than him. youre like a tiny teddy bear.

- 🙀

HELLO ANON OMG??? we’re gonna kiss rn bc… i am also a size kink enjoyer… i love me a big man!!!!! also it’s okay if ur asks aren’t gender neutral! i am afab myself so i totally get how u can lean a certain way without realizing!! i don’t mind :3

heehee now for the sauce i am so hype for this currently…

for this, i’m gonna focus on the smaller reader x bigger mike/chris, but if any tall babes want me to elaborate for them, i 100% can you beautiful gorgeous lengthy creatures you…

mike!! absolutely reads as a man who would (not subtly) have a size kink!!

if you’re shorter/smaller than him, it makes him feel so strong, definitely an ego boost.. watching you struggle to take him? your little hands on his body?? HELLO??!!?!!!

and even if you’re taller/bigger than mike, that’s a still a total ego boost if you let him dom you… watching someone who’s physically capable or possibly assertive totally crumble for him? LORT!

.

it’s so hot to me when a big ol man is so teasing about his physical advantage, but also gentle with you to make sure you’re okay… Mike is one of those guys, he’s a perfect mix of teasing and gentle, like his words make you expect he’s gonna be rough, but he genuinely does take care to not hurt you!! it’s cute to him when you get all whiny, his big hands on your body, one helping to stretch you a little… y’know, to make it a little more comfortable! it makes him wanna cave a little, hearing you beg sooo sweetly, but he’s gonna make you wait! it’s for your own good♥️

and chris.. drools..

chris wouldn’t realize he has a size kink necessarily.. it’s normal to like how big your hands look on your partner’s, isn’t it? doesn’t everyone feel a little extra riled up at the idea of their partner needing a lil extra foreplay to take them?

so he wouldn’t openly acknowledge it as a kink, but it absolutely is, without a doubt. just imagine… chris’s big hands squeezing your hips and thighs, basically throwing you around like a little ragdoll… bc i AGREE! chris is a strong guy who doesn’t recognize his strength sometimes, he’s just too eager to please!!?! his grip on your hips tighter than he intended, leaving little purple splotches where his fingertips had been before… UGHH!!

[27nox]

Okay, so the main purpose of why I included the backstory of my fic “New Overlord” is to understand what happened between Angel and Husk's relationship before. I know it’s quite refreshing to see such a fic that is sometimes focused on the dialogue and also on the descriptions.

Tbh, It was never actually my intention to have a complicated plot, only a mild one, but I unexpectedly turned into this plot that needs a lot of explanation of their current situation.

At first, I just wanted Overlord! Angel Dust to oof Val and went on date with Husk and boom, they ended up together as one of the powerful Overlords in Pride Ring.

But it takes an unexpected turn of events that I suddenly crave for a deeper depth of the plot and their story, I wanted it to add a little bit of spice and angst.

——————————-

So if you want to know about the past timeline to the current timeline between HuskerDust, here’s it!

• Anthony as Mafia Demon was pressured by his Father to become an Overlord so their organization will expand its influence and power.

• (Current Timeline) known as Angel Dust due to him being a “STAR” and being in a relationship with Val -> to oofing him and become Overlord (I wont spoil the reasons^^)

• Henry was just a newly arrived sinner in hell, who was still new with the place and the nature of it.

• (Current Timeline) known as Husk as he left the Mafia District due to “some” reasons and went to become Overlord.

It’s like a slow-burn pace for them, it’s probably gonna take a lot of chapters, especially how Henry was the one who fell in love late since Anthony was the one who already got his eyes on Henry first but was oblivious to his feelings, but as soon as he figured it out, he kept on denial since he doesn’t want to fuck things up. Especially how Anthony knew that Henry didn’t like Mafias so he stood no chance.

Not to mention, Henry saw him like a kid, but Anthony, on the other hand, didn’t want to be treated like one especially since their actual age was not just far away from each other, the only difference was that Anthony died before Henry first.

Their relationship kind of gets better to kind of worse and repeat but we’ll eventually get to better and the most gut-wrenching scene between them soooo yeah.

And for the extra part: I’m also gonna focus between Angel and Val relationship and the reason behind why he was out of his father organization and ended up having himself stuck with a contract with Val

There’s also a sequel of this fic and prequel (cuz of Angel Dust's backstory when he was alive, idk if I should include it here.)

[svnflower-writes]

real sweet but i wish you were sober

Description: in which the mutual pining becomes something both Remus and Sirius have wanted for years due to a drunk, jealous slip up on Sirius' part.

ship: wolfstar + background jegulus

warnings: nothing major I can think of—alcohol consumption, so much fluff, unresolved sexual and romantic tension, painfully obvious flirting, james regulus and peter are a bunch of little shits, jealousy

ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51762532

authors note: SO MUCH FLUFF and remus is second guessing EVERYTHING. obviously inspired by wish you were sober by conan gray :) they’re not together when this starts and remus is feeling very unsure about a lot of things. sirius helps him out with that though ;) somehow from the dining table by harry styles possessed me to write this in half an hour idk why it doesn’t even give the same vibes but ig it feels like a wolfstar song to me soooo —as always this is unedited and i wrote it at 2am so i might read it later and think it's total shit (but currently this is my fave wolfstar fic i've writen) also this was meant to be like 500 words and its almost 2k lmaooo

Remus was a blushing mess. Sirius had insisted on doing Remus’ eyeliner—saying that Remus would just look ‘so hot’ in it—and who was he to refuse? For Sirius, he would do anything. The problem was, he hadn’t exactly pictured agreeing to this resulting in Sirius straddling his hips, leaning extremely close to his face with his tongue poked out due to his level of focus.

“Merlin, Moony, you’ll be the hottest one at the party.” Well, one of us certainly will be, and it’s not me.

Remus was screaming internally, but he mustered a playful smirk and a quick: “am I not already?”

Sirius sent him a grin as he continued to do his makeup, “of course you are, darling. Anyone who disagrees is blind.”

Remus was certainly not blind when it came to noticing the tiny things Sirius was doing, however. The way he pushed his dark curls out of his eyes with one hand and clenched his jaw slightly in concentration with one eyebrow slightly raised? Fucking hell, it drove him insane. Remus wanted so strongly to just grab his face and smash their lips together.

He didn’t do that, obviously.

“Okay, I’m almost done,” Sirius muttered while he did the final touches to the eyeliner. “You ready for everyone at this party to fall madly in love with you?” I only want you to love me.

Remus swallowed a lump in his throat and looked up at Sirius, “as long as you’re one of them.”

Sirius looked a little taken aback for a moment and Remus could’ve sworn he saw him blush, but he was likely just seeing what he wanted to see. At the look on Sirius’ face, Remus mentally cursed himself for speaking his thoughts aloud. Remus’ worry was unnecessary—as it often was—because a broad smile soon took over his features and he pressed a kiss to Remus’ cheek. “You can count on that.”

Even after he had pulled away, Remus could feel the ghost of his lips where they had been on his cheek, and he refused to look at Sirius because he knew he was a blushing mess.

“Moony?”

This broke Remus out of his thoughts, and he looked up with wide eyes. “Yeah?”

Sirius smirked in amusement at Remus’ absentmindedness and the fluffy-haired boy could only hope that he was unaware that he was the cause of it all. “Could you go check if James is ready? I need to fix my outfit.”

Remus scoffed softly, “Pads, I hardly think your outfit needs fixing.” Sirius was wearing a white cropped tank top—Moony loved it because showed off his tattoos and biceps— with an array of necklaces draped around his neck. He had on his favourite baggy jeans (the ones with stars on them that Remus had helped him make) and a black belt adorning his waist, and the look was finished off with a pair of Dr. Martens.

Sirius winked at him, “well, you know me. I have to look perfect for you, my love.”

The last two words almost resulted in Sirius being pushed up against the wall, so Remus opted for a short: “You always look perfect to me, darling,” before he exited the room as fast as he possibly could.

He found James downstairs in their common room, lying on the couch with Regulus curled up at his side. James was stroking Regulus’ hair and whispering sweet nothings into his ears, and Remus smiled at the two as he flopped down on the seat opposite them. James looked up and surveyed his flushed cheeks, he then asked casually, “so, have you two made out yet?”

Remus threw the nearest book (which happened to be Lily’s current reread, Pride and Prejudice) at him before glancing across at Lily, who was sat across the common room watching the exchange with a grin. “Sorry, Lily. it was for a good cause.”

“No, no. I’m curious too. Are the two of you,” she wiggled her eyebrows playfully, “getting any action?”

Remus glared at his friend, “shut up. And for your information, no.”

Regulus cooed at him from where he sat with James, “oh, poor Remus. So much flirting, so little of anything else—including your transfiguration notes, by the way. I wanted to borrow someone’s notes for the class I missed, so I asked James, who obviously redirected me to your extensive pile of notes on your desk. That desk is very disorganised, by the way. But alas, no notes. Never thought you were the type to forget to take notes. Spending too much time yearning over my brother in that class, Lupin?”

Remus looked away in embarrassment, “don’t rely on someone else’s notes next time, Reggie.”

“Don’t spend hours on end staring at my brother and I wouldn’t have to call you out for not having your notes.”

Groaning, Remus stood up, “okay, I’m going to get a sweater. See you guys soon!” he began to walk up the stairs but he was stopped when he walked into Sirius walking down. He had redone his hair and put it half into a low bun, and he had gained several rings and had a leather jacket in his hands.

He grinned at Remus, “ready to go?”

“Oh, I need-”

His favourite woollen jumper was shoved into his arms and he blinked slowly as Sirius spoke. “I thought you might want it.”

Remus shifted his weight from side to side as he looked down at the sweater in his hands and he was overcome with an overwhelming sense of adoration for the boy standing in front of him.

He didn’t realise how long he had been staring down at it until Sirius ruffled his hair softly.

“Hey, you okay? You zoned out.”

“Oh, uh, yeah. I’m fine, thanks for getting this. We can go down now, if you want?”

Sirius nodded, taking Remus’ hand and tugging him gently down the stairs. Remus felt his heart beating faster than he deemed normal, but he couldn’t remember anything about human biology at that moment due to his mind racing at a million miles per minute. As the two walked into the common room, he met eyes with Lily and sent her an alarmed expression, to which she smirked at. She tapped Mary’s shoulder and pointed at Sirius and Remus’ entwined hands. Mary grinned and gave a silent cheer directed to Remus.

There were already more people in the common room, a variation of people Remus recognised and people he didn’t (admittedly more of the later group). Sirius led Remus towards James, Regulus, and Peter, who were now sitting upright on the couch. Remus sat next to Regulus and the boy smirked at him.

“You’re a mess, Lupin.”

Peter walked around the back of the couch to whisper in Remus’ ear, “I say just kiss and be done with it. This flirting is sickening.” Remus gently slapped Peter’s shoulder with the hand that wasn’t still clasped in Sirius’ ring-clad one and the other boy lightly gasped. “Well, they do say love makes people crazy.”

Remus groaned loudly at Peter’s words, and Sirius turned to him. “You okay?”

“No, he’s in-” Remus pressed his free hand over Peter’s mouth with a warning expression directed at the shorter boy.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” He smiled at Sirius, who looked unconvinced and squeezed his hand reassuringly. Remus almost melted right then and there, and Peter snickered at the interaction.

James stood up abruptly, “alright, who wants some firewhisky?”

Sirius cheered, standing up to follow James and pulling Remus to his feet by the hand he didn’t quite want to let go of just yet.

Ten minutes later, Remus was leaning against the wall with a half full glass of firewhisky and a small smile on his face as he watched Sirius participating in some stupid dare. The long-haired boy kept sending little glances over at Remus to see if he was watching and letting his teasing gaze linger when they made eye contact. Somehow, Sirius had convinced Regulus to participate in the game, and the two brothers had light, carefree smiles on their faces.

Remus felt another presence next to him and looked over to see James, watching the Black brothers with a yearning look on his face similar to the one that was probably adorning Remus’ face. Smiling at Remus,

James muttered, “oh, our stars are so pretty.”

Remus nodded in agreement, “so pretty.”

The two stood there with adoring expressions painting their features for another ten minutes minutes before Remus felt an arm wrap around his shoulders, warm breath alarmingly close to his ear. He was overcome with an immense feeling of discomfort.

A sultry feminine voice whispered, “well, aren’t you a handsome specimen, what if I-”

The voice didn’t even get a chance to finish before Remus felt a well-known hand grab his own. “What if you piss off and take your wandering hands out of my boyfriend’s personal space?”

Remus did a double take.

His eyes widened slightly and he glanced at where James had been with a confused expression, only to find that his friend had disappeared. When he finally mustered the courage to look at Sirius, he was surprised to find him with a deep blush covering his cheeks. They met eyes.

“Fuck, I’m sorry! I didn’t know how else to get her away from you—and you were so uncomfortable, I couldn’t just stand there and watch. Plus, I didn’t want her touching you– I’m sorry, I’m rambling, fuck.”

Remus had the best idea he had had all night long. “Who said it was something to be sorry for?”

Sirius froze. “What do you mean?”

“What do you think I mean?”

Sirius looked into Remus’ eyes for a few moments before grabbing his face and smashing their lips together. It was a messy kiss, all teeth clashing and hands grabbing at hair.

Remus pulled away suddenly, “how drunk are you, exactly?”

“Not drunk enough to be making this up, if that’s what you’re asking?”

“Sober enough to remember it in the morning?”

“Well, if I don’t, we can always recreate it.” Sirius winked playfully and squeezed Remus’ hand.

“Hmm, can’t say I’d be opposed to that, darling…” Remus trailed off slowly as he pushed Sirius against the wall, bringing their lips together in another kiss. This kiss was slow, sweet, and a stark contrast to their first kiss. Remus had one hand resting on Sirius’ cheek and another tangled in his curls, and Sirius’ had his arms draped over Remus’ shoulders.

Remus’ eyes suddenly caught the metal glint of a necklace hanging around Sirius’ neck, and he raised an eyebrow as he pulled slightly away from the kiss. “Is that mine?”

Sirius scoffed, “you never wore it, anyway. It was wasted on you.” Remus smiled softly and wasted no time in bringing their lips together once again.

[star-realities]

I love hearing about your drs aaaaaa

Also Ive heard you were struggling, so...

As someone who shifted 2 days ago, this is what helped me:

•Your mind needs to wander somewhat. This is the easiest way to detach from your body. Whenever I focus too hard on my dr I have a hard time focusing on actually going there, so just close your eyes and tell yourself "Hey, I'm in my dr. And if not, then that's okay too"

•Time is relative. This is soooo good. Basically, there is no need to think about "Ive been trying for 7 months" because 7 months could be 7 seconds in your dr!! This helped a LOT

•Breathing techniques are the way to go. Youve probably heard about the wim hof breathing techniques (11 minute video) and its great BECAUSE its not simple breathing and you need a little more effort and a lot more focus to follow his breathing. This is ultimately what helped me shift.

In the end, as long as you dont stress yourself and gently think about something that distracts you from the fact that you are currently in a physical body, youll be fine.

Best of luck!!!! :)))

Love this!! Thank you!!

[oof-spoof]

TLDR; I'm depraved of Invincible fics and if you want something done do it yourself. But also no time and no focus to get said things done 😮‍💨 and go check out @solelifauna 's fics they're fucking amazing and I've chained myself to their "Definitely Not Invincible" series because the first fic had me unhinged immediately to see how things would play out. Nolan and Mark are fucked up and I love it 😭

So if I'm still into the series (I'm currently hopping fandoms because I'm trying to break my cycle of going back to the same one for the legit 16th time) then I'll probably have something by the end of the month because I'm currently taking an English class and the professor is very very specific and strict on how they grade so I'm hoping i can refresh my writing abilities and learn some new things that will help me with writing fics.

I'm doing my best to watch invincible because i really really REALLY want to write some angst and fear/horror shit (i have absolutely zero experience in both those areas) and I want to study the characters in depth to be able to accurately portray them without being too ooc.

So I might try for my next break to get one out, set a deadline for myself just to see what I can do. Its not lack of motivation to write its just my lack of focus and losing my ability to sit still and get things done and I seem to never have time to myself to just chill the f out.

But I'm foaming at the mouth for more fics and I wish for more platonic/romantic/fluff/crack stuff because I'm not really into smut like, I just can't see the appeal to it most times and it has no effect on me.

I don't even remember what triggered me into getting obsessed with the character because it was Omni-man first with how out of pocket he seems, but also he's a dilf. And then i just latched onto this series like a starved vampire and I don't think I'll last very long if i can't write out just ONE fic.

Also @solelifauna has a bunch of fics that I've been injecting into the veins on my brain, I'm foaming at the mouth for most of their series because they are so good at writing, I can feel the emotions and environments as if I'm actually there AND I LOVE BEING ABLE TO DISASSOCIATE INTO A GOOD STORY GO CHECK THEIR WORKS OUT!

Particularly their Definitely Not Invincible fics, I will die for those stories. That's another factor that has me wanting to get back into writing again. Its soooo good 😫 how could you not be inspired?

[nkjemisin]

Hi!

I’m currently struggling to go to sleep the night before a big solo performance for a school event, so I figured I’d ask one of my favorite authors a couple things I’ve been wondering about. (Does flattery still work on people?)

So, I believe I remember you saying something along the lines of “people ask me why I write about weird sex magic. It’s because I read Greek mythology, and it has a lot of weird sex magic.” And I’m paraphrasing that horribly, but I was wondering, what things *have* you drawn inspiration from? I’m in love with the way magic is portrayed in both the Dreamblood books and the Broken Earth trilogy (I’ve yet to read the inheritance series), and I was wondering what inspiration you had? They feel kind of different to me—dreamseed and it’s counterparts seem really rooted in the four humors and the way some older mythos have a big fuss around the seed of gods and all that fun stuff, but the magic in Broken Earth feels a lot more . . . introspective, I guess? It seems like you’ve written it to be much more focused on the individual’s own perception of it, and that influences what they can do/how they do things. And I don’t really think I’ve seen anything that leans into that angle, as far as mythos goes. (Though I really, really cannot claim to be knowledgeable in that.)

And for the second thing: do you have any tips to becoming a good reader? I can read *fast*, but I really feel like I don’t get more than just the surface and shallow ideas about the message/themes the author might intend. It always seems like people are able to come up with very introspective, in depth dissections of their favorite characters and books, and I can’t help but look at those sometimes, and go, “wow, what was *I* reading?” I guess that it might be a learned skill, but I don’t really know where to start. I guess I also wanted to ask about what themes and such you wanted to incorporate into the Broken Earth trilogy (that was my introduction to you, then Dreamblood, then the Great Cities), but that’s really just a secondary thing to this question.

Well, regardless of whether or not you answer, I just wanted to ask so I could stop thinking about it constantly. I can’t wait to jump into the Inheritance Trilogy next time I buy books.

Flattery doesn't work on me, but I do love to talk shop, so... 😄 Cutting for length:

To your first question, about the different ways I depict magic -- first, it's not just Greek mythology that I use. There are soooo many cosmologies and cosmogonies out there that show gods as rowdy, horny, petty, and basically human, just with weird magic powers on top of that. The Dreamblood books are specifically informed by ancient Egyptian mythology and culture. I did some research into ancient Egyptian medical texts -- in particular the Edwin Smith Papyrus -- so I drew from those to create Gujaareh's four dream humors. I wanted Gujaareh to feel like an ancient Egypt that might have developed if magic actually worked... and if its own version of Imhotep had been a manipulative megalomaniac who decided to start a magic-controlled theocracy. tl,dr; Ancient Egyptians had a thing for humors and surgery and gods that were into sex lettuce, so that's what I claimed for Gujaareh.

With the Inheritance Trilogy I ranged more widely in what I mooched from existing cosmologies, because I wanted to build a belief system that resembled real-world stuff but wasn't just our world's gods in costume. For example, I noticed that lots of systems suggested that existence or human genesis begins with gods banging or fighting (or both), so I came up with a creation myth chock full of gods banging and fighting. Familiar hanger, new clothes on it.

But the Broken Earth books aren't about gods. There's a mythic frame "explaining" the Seasons and past disasters and Father Earth and so on, but that wasn't the focus. I was more interested in the ways we apply myths to people, treating some marginalized groups as simultaneously superhuman and subhuman... but never simply human. Same for the Great Cities books. It's meaningful that other cultures have discovered the existence of city avatars and worked them into their cosmologies, but only as a bit of detail to make the world more complete. Again, the mythology isn't the focus there.

I can't help you on becoming a good reader, sadly, because I am a very bad reader these days. I have a lot of trouble shutting off my "inner editor voice," which is a thing that I've heard a lot of other pro authors (and editors, and reviewers) mention. People in my business spend years developing the ability to spot problems in writing... and the inner editor is what happens when you stop being able to shut that ability off. The typos, the clichés, the patches of language that could've been trimmed out, all of it just starts to glare. The thing is, all books have issues like this, and most of the time they're not even errors, just... pecadilloes. The little things that are part of reading work made by human beings. They mean the writer was tired and didn't proofread as closely as they should, or maybe the writer was waffling on word use and inadvertently ended up using one a little too much, or maybe they were having a fight with their copyeditor about spelling and missed a grammar flub. Just part of reading. But if you, like me, have an inflamed inner editor, then instead of taking in the whole picture of whatever the author is trying to show you, you get nitpicky. You get irrationally angry at typos. You hyperfocus on the author's tendency to use one word too much. (A writer friend told me I use too many "plinths," for example.) You spend time thinking about structural issues and not noticing the language, or vice versa.

But since I'm currently in self-imposed reading rehab, maybe this will help you: For me, it helps to move away from what's familiar. I read a lot of stuff outside the SFF genre, because it's easier to shut off my inner editor when I'm less familiar with the tropes, the styles, the concepts. I've also really gotten into audiobooks, for example, because when I can't see the text I can't critique it, or at least not as instantly. So that's all I can suggest. If you've developed the habit of gulping down books, find a way to throttle the flow, so to speak. Try playing audiobooks on half speed, to train yourself to patience. Read outside your comfort zone, which will force you to slow down and take things in because of the unfamiliarity. Maybe try ebooks with the text blown up a lot, so that you have to turn the page more often; I don't know, just spitballing now. Maybe folks will have better suggestions in the comments. Hope it helps!

[spacesymbol]

heyyyyy. crazy month and a half, am i right? 😅

my sincerest apologies for the truckload of reblogs.... plus even more sincere apologies if i reblogged a very old post of yours that you forgot about 😭

ive had those sitting in my drafts for a WHILE so that they wouldnt get drowned in my likes.... but i have some weird mental hangup about posting here without also posting a Life Update..... but i kept procrastinating actually writing a Life Update..... so here we are!!

anyways. that being said. LIFE UPDATE TIME!!!!! (no cut since theres actually some very important stuff in here)

first and somewhat foremost, i submitted SEVEN college applications exactly a month ago. for context, my entire applying list (as of right now) is only nine schools. and i procrastinated SO HARD on the application materials.... it was soooo bad. basically mid october to early november was the most stressed i have ever felt in recent memory 😁👍 and i coped with it soooo well, as i historically always do (sarcasm)

the fall play(s) also recently came and went!!! the rehearsal process wasnt that bad, it was moreso just anxiety provoking since i was constantly saying "yeah it (the show) will come together eventually" even when opening night was a few days away... but the show(s) did come together!! at least, my two scenes did. i honestly can't speak for anyone else, but my scenes both went fine during all three performances with minor errors, if any

although, the week of performances and the last few days of tech was so very brutal. i had to be in the theater until 8pm or later every single day of that week (november 18th to the 23rd), which meant i was in school for over twelve hours each school day. i had to put a lot of things on the backburner to focus on the show (and not losing my mind) that week, and schoolwork was one of them.... so i am currently once again in overdue assignments hell. my classes have been fine other than that though!!!

my mental, emotional, and physical health also definitely have been on the backburner for a WHILE now.... a wonderful example is how i havent seen my therapist in two months now, and for context, im supposed to see her once a week!!! so im clearly doing fine (sarcasm). its weird though, the play honestly wasnt that distressing for me, since i had already hit mental rock bottom earlier that month because of college applications

my physical health has also Not Been Good at all.... one of my scenes in the play (the gay one) involved a shit ton of stage falls.... and our stage is made of polished wood. we took all the necessary precautions to protect my bad knee (knee pads), but that didnt do much to prevent the ridiculous amount of bruising all over my body that i still have a week after the final show.....

eating has also been Bad. but i wont go into details about that 🫶 ive been able to keep having regular appointments with my dietitian, so genuinely dont worry about that. i will be fine!!

ive also been like. mentally checked out for a while, i guess. like i mentioned, ive been doing some research into dissociative disorders and symptoms to get more clarity on if im a system or not (which i do have an answer on btw), and i think the best term to describe it is depersonalization?

and uh. okay this is actually really important. about the system thing, i came to the conclusion after a LOT of research and self reflection that i do not think i am (or ever was) a plural system. i dont think i should post the entire esaay i wrote on how i came to this conclusion (because i dont think most of you want to read all that). but if any mutuals want, i am MORE than happy to dm the whole explanation, since i know it might raise some eyebrows that i suddenly dont identify that way anymore

however, the tldr is that im pretty sure i have dissociative amnesia instead, because i never once experienced amnesia between the personas that i thought were alters, and these personas were never really that separate from me, moreso extensions of me in terms of personality, if that makes sense. there were also some.... quirks of how my "system" operated that also made me suspicious, like how i was basically always frontstuck, and how my "frequent fronters" ALWAYS aligned with my interests at the time. i honestly think that i only arrived at the conclusion that i was a system in the first place because of the environment i was in at the time (the majority my friends at the time had the system realization and were talking about it), and the fact that no one ever really questioned me being one. which im NOT saying that i wish people had, since thats rightfully a very rude thing to do, but i definitely would have benefited from someone kindly calling all that into question, yknow?

the biggest takeaway though, should be that i didnt know until very recently. there is a world of difference between intentionally lying about being a system, and unknowingly being wrong about being a system. the MOMENT i started to suspect that i was wrong, i made it known here (in the previous Life Update) and on twitter, and i refrained from using any system terminology for myself until i came to a definitive conclusion, which i only did recently. additionally, i recently removed the system section from my pronouns dot cc, and my simplyplural account is still up, but obviously not in use

ummm. other personal updates.... im hopefully going to start legal and medical transition soon?? my stepsister (also trans) has been pushing my mom and stepdad for it as a result of the election, which sparks the conversation for me by extension

as you can probably tell by the majority of the recent reblogs, the release of season 2 reawakened my dormant arcane hyperfixation 😭 it somehow came back even stronger??? if any of you happen to remember my jayvik posting from november 2021, you deserve a spacesymbol elders discount....

what else..... oh um!!!! i had an awesome joe cool (snoopy) costume for halloween this year that i made extremely last minute :)

okay. okay!!!!!!! in terms of the future!!!! im on thanksgiving break right now until this tuesday and the break is Extremely welcome.... the spring musical (aka my final high school theater show) has already been announced, and its curtains, which should be exciting, but i dont have to think about that for a While....

in terms of like Immediately upcoming things, my schools robotics team has our first qualifier coming up so im gonna have to lock in on preparing for that soon.... for college stuff, i should be getting two decisions fairly soon (one from my early decision school and one from a rolling deadlines school), and i have two more applications for early january, but all i really have to do for them is finish writing their supplements..... so HOPEFULLY i should be slightly more active on here??? i feel like every time i say that i end up jinxing myself for inactivity, though. so honestly, who knows!!! but i dont really have as much of a Pressing Reason to not be active here, i guess

thats all.... jesus fuck i wrote a lot. my bad!!! no wonder i procrastinated writing this GODDAMN!!!!