#but it's still cool as fuck. my buddy is a chill dude and smokes A LOT of weed

[isfrankytime]

A buddy of mine just casually remembered in conversation with me how many legendary anime voice actors he's smoked weed with (working with guests at conventions in a legal state) and I gotta say, that's the biggest flex any of my friends has.

[toxic3mmy]

prompt: alex is your new and annoying stepbrother

warnings: incest (kinda?), taboo, smexual scenarios, and again… INCESTTTT

not everyone is interested in themes like this and that’s okay! keep in mind, this is all made up and i am by no means encouraging blood relative incest lolll

also, im trying something new— this will be a mini book with hopefully more than two chapters so stay tuned!

Part One

you sighed as you looked at your reflection. new town, new life, new school, but the same old you.

you only had one person you knew in this new city but even then, you didn’t want to overwhelm him with the fact that he’s all you had. you sighed again as you finished getting ready.

a text message from him let you know that he was outside waiting for you. you grabbed your keys and purse before making your way to his car.

“for someone that doesn’t want attention on them, you sure look hot tonight” he winked

“oh shut up. you know i don’t want to go to this party, missa”

“i know, but hey, it could be a good way to make friends you know?”

“i guess you make a good point… let’s go”

he drove you to the house party and you hesitantly followed him inside. immediately as you walked in, missa was greeted by a lot of different people. you felt a little jealous that he had so many friends already. still, you smiled as he let you know he was going to be with his friends and to meet him later in the night for a ride home.

you decided to make your way to the kitchen to find some alcohol to help loosen you up. hopefully you’ll be able to socialize after a drink or two.

you made yourself a simple orange juice and tequila drink and soon wandered off to the vacant backyard. you sat in one of the benches and watched the moon rise.

you weren’t excited about moving, not one bit. but you knew that your mom had a long distance relationship here and you just wanted her to be happy.

you sipped your drink and enjoyed the nighttime breeze. you weren’t too bothered by being by yourself, you were actually quite used to it. you just hoped that it would be a decent college year, considering it was your senior year.

“y/n! hey, want to smoke with me and my buddies?” missa suddenly appeared from inside

“um.. sure, if you’re okay with that”

“of course i am or i wouldn’t have asked” he laughed and led you to the other side of the wraparound back porch

“guys, this is y/n, she just moved here from texas. she’s pretty cool” missa smiled

you nervously waved at his friends and stood quietly as they introduced themselves briefly and passed around a blunt. you weren’t much of a smoker so you knew to take it easy. after you took a small puff, you went to hand it to one of missa’s friends that was standing near you. just as you approached him, he turned around and ran right into your outreached hand with the blunt, burning his arm

“im so sorry—”

“aw fuck! god, watch what the fuck you’re doing you clumsy bitch!” he yelled right in your face

“it was an accident! you don’t have to be such an asshole!” you spat right back

“woah, chill alex, she didn’t mean to do that” missa suddenly said sternly, defensively standing in front of you to shield you

“you’re seriously gonna defend this bitch?” alex narrowed his eyes at you

“dude, i think you’ve had enough to drink”

“fuck you missa… protect your prissy little whore all you want” he mumbled

you had had enough of his insults and you threw your ice cold drink in his face, smiling as he began to cry out that his eyes were burning

missa quickly grabbed your hand and led you through the house and into his car. the two of you were suddenly laughing uncontrollably.

“so much for a first impression” you said, shaking your head

“well, it could’ve been worse. but hey, at least tomorrow you’ll make a better first impression when you meet your mom’s boyfriend and his son” missa shrugged

“i guess you’re right”

he dropped you off at your aunt’s house and you got ready for bed.

~

you woke up early to make sure that all your things were packed and ready to go.

although your mom was in a long distance relationship, her boyfriend had proposed to her a month ago which is why she decided to move the two of you all the way to california.

you had been staying at your aunts house with your mom for about a week now and today was the day that her fiancé was back from a business trip.

this meant that it was also the day the two of you were moving in with her fiancé and his son. yeah… it was definitely a lot to take in. his son still lived with him even though he was in the same grade as you. this was probably because his dad was always away on business trips. at least you’ll have one other person you’ll know at your new college.

“ready to go, mija?”

“yup” you smiled and the two of you said goodbye to your aunt

the car ride to your mom’s fiancés house wasn’t too long. you looked around the neighborhood and admired the huge houses.

as you approached a house at the end of a cul de sac, you almost gasped at the sight. this house was beautiful. it had so many windows which definitely meant a ton of rooms. you were in awe.

your mom put a code in at the front gate and she parked in the driveway. the two of you started unloading your luggage just as a tall handsome older man approached your mom.

“hola hermosa, im so happy to see you” he smiled and embraced your mother

“and you must be y/n, it’s very nice to finally meet you” he took your hand and kissed it gently

“it’s nice to meet you as well” you smiled

the three of you brought in all the luggage from the car. the inside of the house was even more beautiful. you admired its entirety as your mom and soon to be stepdad were catching up a bit

“well, feel free to look around ladies. i will show you to your rooms and— oh yes! i wanted to introduce you to my son. vieja.. y/n… this is my son alexis” he gestured to the figure that was making his way downstairs

your blood immediately boiled as you realized exactly who he was. you said nothing as your mother hugged him and introduced the two of you. you felt enraged and embarrassed all at once

this is definitely going to be a shit show.

[octuscle]

My landlord just told me I have a week till I have to be out of my apartment for no reason! I’ve payed rent, bills, hell I even washed his car! He needs to seriously chill out!

Your fat landlord is already standing in the living room measuring the windows. You try to stay calm. You ask if he wouldn't rather fix the drain in the bathroom first before throwing you out of the apartment for no reason at all. He laughs and pulls the tenancy agreement out of his pocket. And with his dirty fingers, he points to an underlined passage: "No smoking, no weed allowed". And then he looks at your little cannabis plantation with a grin. But he's not a monster… If you give him your weed stash, he'd be willing to let you stay here for a week longer.

You turn pale. Shit! But now it doesn't matter anymore. You take a joint from the can. Light it up. Your landlord turns bright red. "Out of the apartment! Now! You're out by tonight!" You blow the aromatic smoke in his face. He immediately relaxes. You take another drag and hold the fag out to him. He actually wants to smack it out of your hand. But he takes it after all. And takes a drag. An amazingly deep puff. And he blows out the smoke in a very routine manner. He asks what the problem is with the drain. You giggle as you turn on the tap and watch the water run off far too slowly. Your landlord turns off the water, takes another puff, turns the water back on, giggles and just says "Totally cool, dude!"

When you've finished the joint, you have a munchies attack. Fortunately, your landlord's fridge is full. And you still have a few mushrooms left. Magic mushrooms. After a few minutes, your landlord's kitchen is a battlefield. You have a food fight. Then you take each other's clothes off and play catch in the apartment.

You ask your bro if his parents will scold you for trashing the apartment. "Nah, they're totally chilled. And they won't be back from vacation for another two weeks," replies your stoner buddy. And then he asks if you want to fuck first and then bake hash cookies or the other way around.

[fappellmoan]

bitch post time!!!!!! many revelations ok last night's vibes were HEINOUS but it provided so much for me and lydia to talk about and now i am gonna share with you yippee storytime

k so we plan to go to this valentines day showcase thing that the college radio is putting on last night. mind you at my place of work where i pretended that i had a family emergency and had to go home cause i didnt feel like going into work yesterday morning lol idiot... i was so paranoid my boss was there in disguise or some shit it was stupid. sorry um. yeah so ok i was largely like this could be a chance for friend groups to come together and maybe ill be able to talk to sams roommate and also like i do want to see more live music and it's free! so. anyway ok wait let me tell u abt the first part of the day

so me and lydia drive over some wine bottles to sam for him to use as props in a film. and sam and the roommate are sitting on their porch and we chat a little bit acc sam said as i walked up 'you always look so suspicious' and i was like 'ok u guys were literally just staring at me' cause they WERE and roommate was actually really nicely like 'oh no you're okay' and generally was just kind of inserting into our convo which well i had fun with naturally. um anyway and then who comes running up but teko! our buddy teko. and sams like have yall met and im like Of course and teko gives me a hug and i cant lie it was actually so sweet. i am also extremely touch starved but it was a nice hug. anyway. then i had to help roommate pick shoes alongside teko's fit and then i was like um Ok Bye. when i got back in the car lydia was like so i saw a neon sweatshirt... and i was like yeah <3 that's my man <3 sorry ok vibes get worse as the night comes

me and lydia end up getting to sam's late to 'pregame' this show and ig it was supposed be like. it was encouraged to dress formally. and i was wearing a dress that was too small and my chappell red tights and docs. kind of a serve but me and lydia were serving much more valentines day than formal. anyway. roommate does swing around to be like hi! and THEN i see my girl chloe i looooove her shes so fuckin funny and weird and we made this weird little short together in class last semester and i was kinda intimidated by her so i was so happy shocked when she was like I was so excited to see u :D WEEE shes so cool guys and has the funniest fuckin laugh and well honestly the high points of the night were us and lydia fucking around and dancing and being weird and offputting wallflowers cause again this thing SUCKED. ok

we did also smoke beforehand and i accidentally took this huge hit and then thought id be fine w a little more but brother was i feeling funny. did not eat enough and didnt take water it was atrocious. so. we get there and let me tell you if I WAS WORKING i'd have been able to fix the fact that it was soooooooooo fucking loud in there like bad bad bad audio distortion etc i wanted to kick this dude off the mixer but like what ever... it hurt so bad. and the lights were mostly on until chloe and sam duped this guy into dimming some of them but even still it was giving middle school dance. without the fun cheesy music. some of my instagram gay people are there. um but sorry there was simply no way i was going near that dance floor like the bands lowkey highkey sucked (i mean it was just a bunch of white college dudes and they did not slay. shocker. sam kept being like 'they're so good' and we were like um haha... straight face emoji)

we acc disappeared for a while to another floor for the br and just chilled for like half an hour (and security came to find us lmfaooo but ended up just leaving) and i was feeling odd and out of body and too aware of how i looked and it was just not great i was like we're the only bitches serving cunt here... um. anywho. so like later theres a slow dance and roommate is dancing with this other girl i only know from instagram till this point and i suppose if i was really feeling myself i could have tried to make a move but i was not. once again. vile vibes in this place. like i dont mean to be a pussy i typically would be much more charming and fun if i wanted to flirt and kinda felt the vibe from them but i was not really enjoying myself LMAO

then some more of the friend group shows up at the end and sam's like 'drama is actively going down' and im like Wuhhhh the fuck and i feel like a few of them r looking at me and i was just like get me OUT of here but for some fuck ass reason was still like nooooo we should go over and have pizza w sam and them. forgive me for thinking they had like frozen pizza or smth and i could get some free food out of this no we had to sit there and wait for dominos or whatever

AND THE MOST ANNOOOOOOOOOOOYING AWFUL TERRIBLE GROSS MEN YOUVE EVER MET SAT THERE AND JOINED THE BRIEF SMOKE CIRCLE AND THEN WERE JUST THERE AND LIKE YOU COULD JUST FEEL THEM TAKING UP SPACE AND US 'GIRLS' WERE MADE TO FEEL SO SMALL ON THE FUCKING COUCH I WAS SOOOOOOOO TIRED. had to get a sweater cause i felt so uncomfortable. girl i really was only there in case i could have a saving grace moment with roommate im so serious. well and for chloe but otherwise me and lydia shoulda been outta there

literally chloe was so excited to show our little video to people and sam cut us off from getting there to show us the fucking fidget spinner game he has on his tv. girl get out! oh my fucking god. finally lydias like Cool anyway so - like sams misogyny jumped out in previously unprecedented ways. it was bad. these boys were truly making me want to kill myself im sorry like it was so bad i have curated my experience so as to be away from that for so long it was really jarring. and what you need to understand about sam is that he's almost died twice and kind of has a funny little gender vibe going on and so for a while now yeah we've gotten along through silly odd things we relate through but holy shit....... that was so offputting i cant even wrap my brain around it

also sam very much walked me into like yaoi-fying him and his best friend and then was like haha noooo why r u calling us gay ur so weird bitch just fuck him already im tired and also dont care.. hes so attention seeking and not used to um not being the center of attention. sorry! oopsies anyway so

so then im like ew like i kinda need to reassess um. the people im around. and again cant stress enough how gross and judged and just kinda old i felt surrounded by these ppl even tho theyre all like within a year of age? and like roommate still seems maybe cool but since we didnt actually talk and they were off w the other roommate/other ppl i cant help but associate them w the odd vibes but like. honestly idk i might just try to uh slide into their dms rlly casually. bc. well idk how the friend group is fracturing and it wouldnt surprise me if they were annoyed with sam esp living with him but obv i dont really know. but again let me stress this friend group has been friends since their freshman year like what r yall doing yeah u do need to break up....

so i figure since they're hot (and kinda tiny i cant tell if they're shorter than me or just right around my height) (but also they kind of scared me by giving Instagram face while posing for a pic last night i cant do any more people giving off dorian gray rn. but i was also under the influence so um that didnt help) i could just yeah be brave see how it goes and worst case scenario it's not a vibe yk. and best case scenario i get to hang w them and teko. teko so gives francis. anyway

OH also sam and the friends insisted on listening to this ai generated… thing like idk guys i think i was in hell fr

also had several men yell out of their cars at me and staring at me as we walked to the bus stop :/ so men really do ruin everything btw

um. so. that was the night! thx for reading if u did. i am excited to be around other fun silly cool queer people god bless fuck these people

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Looking for a Place to Happen 3

Warnings: non-consent sex and rape (series), age gap, general stupidity, some violence and threats, toy play, forced masturbation, some content not warned.

This is dark!biker!Sam Wilson x reader and explicit. 18+ only.  Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Series Synopsis: There’s lots happening in Birch and you find it all too amusing.

Sister series to Smalltown Bringdown, When the Weight Comes Down, Little Bones, and Fully Completely

Note: Again, I’m always grateful to anyone who reads. Take care.

Thanks to everyone for their patience and feedback. :)

I really hope you enjoy. 💋

<3 Let me know what you think with a like or reblog or reply or an ask! Love ya!

Chapter 3: Wayward ho, away we go

💀💀💀

You bent and picked up your phone. The screen protector was cracked and peeling. You lifted it off and checked for any real damage. The stream had ended but it was still operational. You tucked it away as you looked between the bikers and grabbed your jacket.

“Well, thanks for the show,” you headed for the door but found yourself shadowed.

You swung the door out into the cold and that man, Sam, followed you onto the beaten down snow across the sidewalk. He stopped you before you could evade him and cross the street. You turned back and squinted at him.

“You know, I didn’t even get to pay my tab,” you pulled away from him roughly.

“So, do I get a name yet?” he asked.

“You guys are weird,” you grimaced, “no.”

“Come on, I just saved your ass,” he crossed his arms as his breath fogged before him, “I mean, you kinda owe me.”

“Maybe your friends need to learn to control their tempers,” you scoffed and hopped over the snow to cross the street. As you expected, he kept on and as you came to the other side, you turned on him. “Look, dude, you know that whole hard-to-get thing is a myth. I’m not interested.”

He chuckled under his breath and shoved his hands into his coat, “sure,” he smirked, “I can’t let you walk home alone. Not after you go and insult the whole club. Do you really not know the shit that is aimed in your direction right now?”

“Are you talking about yourself or…” you said wryly and spun back to your path, “it’s a small town, I’ll make it home.”

“Oh yeah, it is a small town,” he caught up to you and kept step with you, “you think I don’t already know where you live?”

You ignored him and zipped up your jacket as the cold began to seep in. As he said your name, you stopped short. A chill went through you that wasn’t the winter.

“You’re a creep,” you said.

He laughed again and slung his arm over your shoulder. You tried to wiggle him off but he kept you firmly in place against him. He began to walk, pushing you forward across cracked edges of ice left from diligent shovels.

“Honey, let me tell you something, what I did back there, you’re not just walking away scot-free, you get that? You want me gone? Well, then you can find out what happens without me watching your back,” he said as he squeezed you, “I can go back right now and tell those boys it’s free hunting. You won’t make it past the corner.”

You stiffened and shifted. You were never the brightest, you made dumb decisions, but you knew then this was worse than any before. Your fun time was really a big fucking mistake. How many warnings did you need before you realised how stupid you really were? It wasn’t just a meme, it was like the godfather sent a horse head straight to your door.

“Hmm, don’t think I’ve ever seen you so quiet,” he mused as his arm slipped and his hand went to the small of your back. He turned you down your street and you glanced around at the familiar houses, “listen, you’re probably scared shitless right now? Or should be if you were smart enough to notice the gun on my buddy’s hip? Or the one on mine?”

“Is this how you always get girls?” you croaked through your dry mouth as you closed in on your nan’s house.

“I’m sure other guys like the whole snarky manic pixie dream girl thing you got going on, but I’m not other guys,” he returned as he stopped you just at the end of your grandmother’s walk, “and you didn’t just fuck around with a couple of bikers tonight, you insulted the whole club. In fact, I’m a little pressed about it myself.”

He reached out and slid two fingers into your jacket pocket. He took your phone out and turned it in his hand.

“No more of this,” he put it in his back jean pocket, “not tonight. I’ll be back tomorrow and we’ll go over the rest of it but… if I see one TikTok or one meme, I’m going to be knocking on that window just above your bed.”

You blanched and peeked over your shoulder. The curtains moved as you caught your nan’s grey hair disappear behind it. You put on that stubborn pout you always got when things didn’t go your way and narrowed your eyes.

“You know this isn’t normal, right?” you whined.

He snickered and puffed out his chest, “this is Birch. This is how things go.” He reached out and ran his thumb over your chin, “you’re young, you’ll learn.” He winked and looked over at your nan’s house and waved with two fingers. “Tell the old lady I say hi,” he grinned, “but I can always tell her tomorrow.”

You scrunched your lips as felt like folding inward. He turned and strode off back down the street, his shadow fading into those cast by the streetlights. You sighed and headed up the walk and pounded your soles up the stairs. You let yourself in but faced another obstacle in your night.

Your nan sucked on a cigarette as she watched you unzip your coat.

“I thought you quit,” you said as you hung your coat on the rack.

“I thought I told you to stay away from the club,” she sniffed.

“Well… I tried,” you lied poorly.

“Oh, yeah, I’m sure you did,” she flicked the ash into the carpet without concern, “I’m an old lady now, I can’t help you.”

“He’ll go away. He’s just… you know how guys are,” you knelt to undo your boots.

“I do, do you?” she challenged, “I don’t remember many boyfriends gracing my stoop.”

“He’s not--”

“That man will make himself whatever he wants to be,” she gristled, “that’s how they work.”

“Look,” you stood and rubbed your forehead, “I know I fucked up. Can you just--”

“Oh, I won’t just,” she snapped, “let me tell you something, don’t be afraid to grab a man by the balls and twist. It saved me a lot of trouble.”

“Nan--”

“I’m not saying you should, just giving you options,” she puffed out smoke, “but you gotta be smart and make the shot count.”

“I don’t… get it,” you blinked.

“You will know,” she tilted her head, “women got a sixth sense. You’ll find out soon enough.”

💀

Your nan’s words stuck in your head. Your day off was no longer as exciting. You woke with a knot in your stomach and a dull stone behind your eye. You descended to join your grandmother for coffee, restless as you didn’t have your phone to keep you busy. You fidgeted and drank the bitter brew without a hit of sugar or milk.

There was a lingering shade of dread as the wise widow’s words swirled in your head with the strange man’s promise. He said he’d be back, he didn’t say what time, he didn’t say for what, but he said he would. As much as you rolled your eyes at the club, those men proved they had conviction and Sam had shown himself to be persistent.

You ate porridge with cinnamon and fake sugar. Your grandmother’s daily fare. You left her to her crosswords and her ramblings about the daily news. You told her to change the channel and lighten up before you went. She quipped back at you to “smarten up” and for once, you had no rebuttal; she was right, it was only that it was likely too late.

You sat in bed and watched Netflix. You had your laptop but you didn’t dare look at your TikTok as it just reminded you of the night before. It all began to sink in as you felt the thick arm around your neck and heard the rough gristle of the boss’ voice. You only realised then how close you’d been to biting it and it made your skin crawl.

Hours passed and you began to pace and fuss around with random pens and books. Maybe he forgot, maybe he wasn’t coming. Maybe it had all been threats to make you stop. Well, it worked and you would delete your TikTok once you got the nerve to open it.

Then you heard the heavy boots on the stairs and the pounding at your door extinguished the hope disguised as doubt. You cringed and stood in one place as you couldn’t bring yourself to move. You crossed your arms and chewed your lip. 

You were very bad at thinking things through. You didn’t consider that you hardly knew this man, though the fact was plain in your mind. You didn’t consider that you’d rarely been alone with a man. You didn’t consider that you knew exactly what his vulgar looks and suave words meant and that your denial could not erase them and all of these things were obvious and unavoidable.

A tapping came at the window beside the door and he waved to you as the blur in your vision cleared. You bit down on the inside of your lip and made yourself cross to the door. He turned the handle as you did and pushed his way past your reticence. He stepped in as you stumbled back.

You were good at acting cool, at being the quirky friend, the goofball, but when it came down to it, you were just clueless. It was better to seem apathetic and not let on how much of a loner you really were. You always wanted to be one of the cool kids but never really were.

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” he kicked the snow off his boots and it powdered over the mat, “this is a cute little place you have.”

“Alright, alright, I get it, I’m scared, okay? I’ll delete everything and won’t do it again,” you raised your hands defenselessly, “you made your point--”

“Have I?” he sniffed as he let his leather jacket fall down his arms, “because I’ve been thinking all day. How to punish you. You see, these things, you have to be punished. That’s the rules.”

“I…” you backed away from him slowly as he sat in the wicker chair behind the door and unlaced his boots.

“Not my rules, the club’s,” he said flatly, “now, don’t be lookin’ at me like that because if I’d left you with those other boys, you’d be in the rubble of that garage.”

You gulped and hugged yourself as your eyes rounded. His eyes clung to you and he grinned as he stood.

“Well, I know you’re telling the truth at least,” he said, “you’re scared.”

He neared and walked past you. He circled you and slapped your ass. You flinched and he chuckled. You were startled at how quickly he’d disassembled you. You tried to ready yourself mentally all day for his arrival and yet you could never be prepared for that instance.

He strode along the other side of the bed and pulled out the top drawer of your night stand. He shuffled through your things and slammed it. He turned back and went to your dresser and slid out the slender drawer of necklaces and random receipts. He felt around blindly and you heard the familiar roll against the wooden bottom.

“Ah, jackpot,” he pulled out the silicone vibe and spun it between his fingers as you watched him over your shoulder, “I knew a girl once, kept it hidden under her mattress, another had this vase on her desk… but mostly, no one puts much thought into hiding when no one’s looking.”

“What are--”

“Shhhh,” he hushed you as he put his finger against his lips, “it’s a very simple punishment and if I’m being honest, and let’s be clear I’m being very generous here, it’s not much punishment at all.” He took your hand and pushed the vibe against your palm, “you just gotta use that.”

You furrowed your brows as his warm hand closed yours around the silicone and he squeezed. You trembled and he let you go as he winked.

“Chop, chop,” he clapped his hands, “I can always come up with something else.”

You searched his face as he backed up and leaned on your dresser, arms crossed over his thick chest as his biceps bulged through his long sleeves. You peered down at the toy in your hands and traced the subtle curve with your thumb.

“Get comfortable, honey,” he coaxed, “when you finish, we’re done… for tonight.”

You were breathless as you turned away from him. Your head spun and you recounted all your mistakes as they rushed over you. You were so stupid. You couldn’t blame anyone but yourself but that didn’t make it any easier. 

And you couldn’t do it. Even alone, you were always filled with the sense that everyone knew what you were doing with the vibe. That some lurker would hear you and expose your secret. A guilt atoned only in your pleasure.

“Tick, tock,” he chirped as you heard the wood groan against his weight, “you need help?”

“N-no,” you stuttered and dropped the toy on the bed.

You fumbled with your fly for what felt like forever. Your hands were shaking so bad and stopped as you asked yourself what you were doing. What you had to. You had no doubt in his promises. You were learning the hard way like you always did.

You shimmied your jeans down and slid them to your ankles. You got up on the bed and he tutted. 

“Panties,” he snapped his fingers, “don’t be shy.”

You didn’t look at him as you lifted your ass and tugged down your panties. You kept your legs together as you unhooked them from your ankles and shoved them aside. You cleared your throat and reached for the toy as his figure loomed along the top of your vision. You clicked the button and stared at the buzzing vibrator.

“Almost there, honey,” he purred, “I’m starting to think you’re liking this already.”

You sucked in your breath and pushed your legs apart as you closed your eyes. You put your hand on the bed behind you and leaned back as you shoved the toy against your cunt and hissed as it rolled over your clit. You cupped it with your palm and moved it over your bud as the ripples flowed from your core.

You clamped your lips in your usual habit. You held in the moans that threatened and tried to ignore the soft breath of the man in the room. Your whole body was alight with shame and lust fed by the vibrations. You dropped your head forward and winced as you sensed him come closer.

“Oh, honey, look at you just diving right in,” he taunted, “that’s it… you don’t gotta be quiet with me.”

“St-st-stop,” you rasped out, “I can’t--”

“You are,” he slithered, “now keep going. I see you getting close already.”

You squeezed your eyes tight and gripped the toy between two fingers and swirled the tip around your clit. You wanted it to be over and despite yourself, his voice fed your need for release. You hummed between your teeth and arched your back as you rocked your hips against the vibe hungrily.

“Mm mm mm, honey, I don’t think you could handle a man,” he teased.

You gasped and panted as you felt the pressure pulse and you sped up. Your other arm shook and collapsed as you fell onto your back and writhed as you closed your legs around your hand and the toy. You came with a whimper as your body shook and you turned onto your side as the orgasm echoed through you.

“Very good,” he cooed and you felt a dip in the bed. You opened your eyes as he leaned his knee on the edge, “smile for the camera, honey.” You gaped at the lens of your phone and snickered as he lowered it, “now that… I think that might go viral.”

“Wha-- No,” you sat up and reached out as he stepped back and you nearly toppled over the side of the bed.

“Hmm, I might keep it to myself,” he tapped his fingertip against the back of the phone, “I don’t really like to share…” he faced you again and tucked the phone away, “I usually keep my girls to myself.” You blinked and bent your legs as you tried to cover your bottom half. He pushed his chest out and exhaled, “you are mine, right, honey?”

[rebelwrites]

It’s Me Or Her? - Part One

Clay Spenser x Reader

A/N: I’ve had this idea buzzing around my head for a little bit but don’t worry there will be a part 2

Join The Group Chat Here - If You Want Tagging Manually Let Me Know 🖤

Clay Spenser Masterlist

This Months Writing

“Yo Y/L/N” Sonny grinned appearing in the doorway of your cage.

“What” you glared looking up from your phone, you knew what he was going to say.

“You haven’t told me if you are going to the bbq tomorrow” he smirked, leaning against the metal. “So you coming or what?”

“I don’t have a choice do I?” You asked.

“Nope I was just being polite asking, if I have to come to your house and kidnap you I will” he grinned.

“Will she be there?” You hissed.

“Well considering she is Clay’s girlfriend and it’s our before deployment bbq yes she will” Sonny nodded, he knew just how much you hated her, and he also knew that ever since she got with Clay you felt like you lost your best friend and also he knew about your feelings for him.

“Great” you said sarcastically, moving your gaze to the door as the rest of the team strolled in.

“Watch out lads, Princess is in a mood today” Sonny laughed quickly changing the subject.

“When isn’t she” Ray winked as he fist bumped you before going to his cage.

“You might be 2IC Perry but I will drop you like a lead balloon” you smiled innocently.

“What’s up?” Clay asked standing where Sonny was just moments ago.

“Nothing, I'm just peachy,” you said, rolling your eyes as you stood up. “Anyway, what do you care?”

“Because you’re my friend” he said with a sad smile on his face.

“Yeah friend” you scoffed barging past him and headed for the door.

“Oi moody where are you going” Jase shouted as you hand touched the handle.

“For a piss and a smoke” you snapped. “Don’t worry I will be back in time for training”

It took Bravo team a while to adjust to having a female on the team but they eventually came around so they all knew how to handle your moods but they were getting a bit concerned with the tension that was bubbling away under the surface between you and Clay. Jase sighed as he pulled Sonny to the side.

“I’m guessing it’s something to do with tomorrow” he whispered.

“Yeah, we are gonna have to keep an eye on her make sure she doesn’t flip out” Sonny whispered.

“Maybe her and Clay need to have it out before we leave, otherwise it’s gonna be a long 3 months” Jase sighed.

“Either way I have a feeling there’s gonna be a fight tomorrow” Sonny whispered. “It’s really starting to get to her now even though she tries not to show it is”

“I actually thought I was going to have to kidnap you” Sonny laughed as he pulled you into a hug.

“Yeah well I considered bailing but things could get interesting” you laughed grabbing a beer out of the cool box, as you brought the bottle to your lips Jase draped his arm over your shoulder.

“I hope you are gonna be on your best behaviour tonight” he smirked.

“I mean when do I ever behave Jase” you smirked looking up at him.

“Just don’t start any fights, okay” he whispered, kissing the top of your head.

“No promises” you shrugged, wiggling out of his grasp to go find Cerberus.

The moment you flopped onto the grass you saw Clay and Jenny walk into the garden, you didn’t realise you growled until Cerberus nuzzled his snout against your cheek.

“I know buddy” you whispered kissing his nose. You really didn’t see what Clay saw in her, she wasn’t the type of person to hang around with rowdy tier one operators, in fact she was the person to date one just so say she dated a Seal. I mean who wears six inch stilettos to a god damn bbq.

All you wanted to do was punch her in the face, but you knew everyone would be keeping tabs on you tonight so you decided to stay out the way, the way you were feeling right now it was the safe option.

Your peace didn’t last long as Sonny came over and literally flung you over his shoulder.

“I swear to god I will stab you asshole” you growled as he carried you through the garden.

“Stop being an unsociable demon then” he laughed dropping your on your ass in the middle of the group.

“You better sleep with one eye open in J-Bad” you growled looking up at him “I’m coming for you Sonny Quinn”

“Give it your best shot Princess” he winked before going back to the grill.

Sighing in defeat you pulled your phone out , connecting it to Blackburn’s outdoor surround system, scrolling through your playlist you were looking for one song, a song that you knew would cause shit but you needed a good fight. Standing to your feet you went to join Jase, Ray and Sonny around the grill whilst pressing play on the song.

Hey, hey, you, you, I don't like your girlfriend (That's right) No way, no way, I think you need a new one. Hey, hey, you, you, I could be your girlfriend. Hey, hey, you, you, I know that you like me. No way, no way, you know it's not a secret. Hey, hey, you, you, I want to be your girlfriend

“Please tell me you didn’t just put this song on” Jase sighed as he realised the song you put on that was now blasting out loud.

“Don’t know what you are on about” you shrugged “I just put my playlist on shuffle”

“Give me strength” he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Dude it’s just a song chill out” you laughed.

“Yes but it’s the meaning behind the song and you know it” Ray sighed.

You're so fine, I want you mine, you're so delicious. I think about you all the time, you're so addictive. Don't you know what I can do to make you feel alright? (Alright, alright, alright, alright)

“Look I’m not going to do anything so chill out” you nodded looking around the garden, making eye contact with Clay. You always had flirty banter with him until he got with Jenny, she instantly took a disliking to you, didn’t like how close you were with Clay. Your eyes were still locked as you sang along with the song. “Don't pretend, I think you know I'm damn precious. And hell yeah, I'm the motherfucking princess. I can tell you like me too and you know I'm right”

In a way this was your way of admitting your true feelings to him, it was ironic that you wasn’t afraid of being the first person through the door but when it came to your feelings that scared the fuck out of you.

She's like so whatever. You could do so much better. I think we should get together now. And that's what everyone's talking about. Hey, hey, you, you, I don't like your girlfriend. No way, no way, I think you need a new one. Hey, hey, you, you, I could be your girlfriend. Hey, hey, you, you, I know that you like me. No way, no way, you know it's not a secret. Hey, hey, you, you, I want to be your girlfriend

“Whatever happens you have my six right?” You asked looking up at the boys.

“You know we always do” Ray said, squeezing your shoulder. “Just don’t do anything stupid”

“Come on this is me we are on about Ray” you laughed sipping your beer, watching how Jenny realised you and Clay were still holding eye contact across the garden and you could literally see steam coming out of her ears. “But if she wants to start fucking let her”

“That’s what I’m worried about” he sighed “we don’t need you banged up for this deployment”

“When do I ever lose a fight” you winked before going to mingle with the rest of the team.

The boys couldn’t take their eyes off Clay and Jenny, just waiting for the moment it popped off so they could intervene.

“Deployment is going to be fun” Sonny said with sarcasm laced in his voice.

In a second, you'll be wrapped around my finger. 'Cause I can, 'cause I can do it better. There's no other, so when's it gonna sink in? She's so stupid, what the hell were you thinking? In a second, you'll be wrapped around my finger. 'Cause I can, 'cause I can do it better. There's no other, so when's it gonna sink in? She's so stupid, what the hell were you thinking?

Before you knew it you felt someone pulling your hair making you scream at the sudden contact. That was it, you saw red, you ignored the pain from Jenny’s grip on your hair as you managed to get out of her hold, without even thinking your fist connected with her face, so hard you felt it crack making your smirk.

“Don’t ever try to sneak attack a Seal bitch” you spat as she clutched her nose.

“Y/N what the fuck” Clay snapped rushing to Jenny’s aid, “you fucking broke her nose”

“Oh did I?” You shrugged, rolling your eyes.

“The fuck has gotten into you recently, this isn’t you” Clay shouted as Trent took Jenny to go see to her nose.

“Oh that’s fucking rich coming from you” you growled, squaring you with Clay with your fists balled at your side.

“I don’t know what youre talking about” Clay growled back, your bodies pressed together.

“Well how about ever since you got with her , you never hang with the team anymore, you bail on us all the goddamn time. Or how about when I needed my best friend because I was having a hard time with some news I got but you blew me off because you had plans with her” you screamed as the hot tears ran down your cheeks. “Or when the weight of the last fucking op was near enough crushing me to the point I nearly left the fucking team, you didn’t even notice because you are never around. So much for being my best friend and having my six”

“Come one Y/L/N” Jase said in your ear as he wrapped his arms around your waist pulling you away from Clay.

“I didn’t know” Clay said, softening his tone.

“Like I said it’s because you are never around” you screamed as you thrashed in Jason’s grip. As Jenny appeared next to Clay, wrapping her hand around his arm. “You know I was moments away from spilling my heart out to you last deployment but stopped myself because you’d never feel anything for your best friend despite the years of flirting”

“Baby she’s just jealous” Jenny whined.

“Bitch I can show you jealous if you want” you growled as Jase picked you up taking you further away from the situation.

“Walk it off” he snapped as he put you on the ground.

“Why should I?” You snapped.

“Just fucking walk it off Y/N” Jase snapped before dropping his tone. “Please just go calm down”

“Fine” you huffed grabbing the bottle of whiskey off the side when he let you go.

As you were taking yourself for a walk to try and calm down you heard Jenny ask Clay a question that you weren't sure if you wanted to know the answer to so you started sprinting to get as far away from them as possible.

“You gotta choose Clay, it’s me or her?”

@chibsytelford @mrsmarvelous1995 @supervalcsi @talicat713 @disasterfandoms @bravo-four-seal-team @jasonbabymama @jayhalsteadfan-2417 @lotsoflovefromlea @seik-o @ohitsnicolexo @velvetcardiganbucky @phoenixhalliwell @pancakeisreading @itsonautopilot @pinkrockstar19 @galaxysanduniversesinmymind @softi92 @abby-splace

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 295: So How Are You Holding Up (Because I’m a Potato)

Previously on BnHA: Horikoshi randomly and graciously decided to answer all of our long-standing questions about Mr. Compress, including “is he secretly hot,” “is he secretly related to that Robin Hood thief guy,” and “is he ever going to use his quirk to chain chomp a hole right through his ass??” with the answer to all three being “yes, of course.” As for our follow-up questions, “sir, is Mr. Compress going to die,” and “holy shit,” his answers were, respectively, “wait and see,” and, “I understand, really I do, but that isn’t actually a question.” Well, he’s got us there.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi finally ends the War arc with the speed and grace of an overworked college student scrambling to BS their entire midterm essay with five minutes left before the deadline. Deku’s Spidey Sense is all “what up, I exist, p.s. you’re in danger kid” like oh shit, no, you think?? Compress is all “I’m not gonna die but I am going to pass out and be captured” and honestly, at this point I’ll take it. Spinner is all “Tomura you can have this one last Souvenir Hand I found that was in the oven for too long” and slaps it on his face because HE’S JUST TRYING TO BE HELPFUL, SHUT UP. Dabi is all, “[currently in a marble].”Tomura is all “actually, I’m AFO.” AFO is all “hahahahaha” and summons all of the remaining Noumus to cart him and Spinner and Dabi off to safety. Deku is all “DAMMIT TOMURA I’M REALLY MAD AT YOU FOR KILLING, AND I QUOTE, ‘AN UNBELIEVABLE AMOUNT OF PEOPLE’, BUT AT THE SAME TIME, GET THIS, I TOTALLY WANT TO SAVE YOU TOO! LMAO ISN’T THAT WILD.” Fandom is all “OH MY GOD, NO WAY, is what we would say if we had literally never met Deku before, I guess.” And then the arc just ends, lol. See you in the new year, kids.

WAKE UP, LINK... I MEAN, DEKU

jesus christ Vestiges, not a one of you guys has got any chill at ALL. LISTEN TO ME. THIS CHILD IS DEAD. HE IS DECEASED. LOOK AT HIM. HE’S LYING THERE ALL DAZED WITH HIS ARMS AND LEGS TURNED INTO GREEN PUDDING AND YOU’RE ALL “GET UP LAZYBONES” LIKE I SWEAR TO GOD. CAN HE JUST REST?? CAN YOU ALL JUST CALL IT A DRAW WITH THE VILLAINS ALREADY SO WE CAN FINALLY END THIS TRAUMATIC ARC AND MOVE ON TO THE NEW “TRIAGE AND ROBOT LIMBS FOR EVERYBODY” ARC INSTEAD

LIE BACK DOWN YOU IDIOT!!

no you didn’t pass out because of a ~heatwave~, you passed out because he set you on fire while you were out here shooting Blackwhip out of your mouth with your SPINDLY ACCORDION LIMBS dangling uselessly from you like WINDCHIMES you RIDICULOUS BOY

“where’s Todoroki-kun” oh shiiiiiiit. right. god I hope someone caught him. BAKUGOU OWES HIM A FAVOR, HOW ‘BOUT IT

OH NEVER MIND HE APPARENTLY CAUGHT HIMSELF??

Todoroki Shouto has really highkey been the MVP of the entire fourth quarter of this arc. he deserves the world, and odds are all Horikoshi’s going to give him are lasting trauma, and a souvenir shirt that says “I survived this stupid arc and all I got was this t-shirt”

anyway now Deku’s being hit by a Lightning Bolt of Realization or some such? idk what’s going on, but I bet you it’s related to Tomura waking up again

OH SHIT??

LOL WHAT. THAT’S IT?? SPIDEY-SENSE?? I mean we all predicted Spidey-Sense being one of his quirks like ages ago, so Well Done, Us, I guess

but also, seriously?? all of that drama and intrigue about the fourth user’s quirk and this is what we end up with? what was All Might being so cagey about then? how did this dude die? I need answers goddammit. new, better answers lol

maybe it’s something to do with the fact that Deku keeps talking about how his head hurts?

I mean, for Deku of all people to be all “ouch that hurts”, it must really fucking hurt, you know? like oh my god Deku are you dying

lmao and SPEAKING OF PEOPLE WHO APPARENTLY DON’T FEEL PAIN

this man is out here FROLICKING, half-naked and half-torsoed, AND STILL FEVERISHLY RATTLING OFF HIS MONOLGOUE. YOU HAVEN’T EVEN ESCAPED YET YOU DINGUS. did watching Dabi pour bleach over his head inspire you to think of interesting new ways you could abuse your own body for the sake of Theatrics?? why are villains Like This

anyway so now Mirio’s punching him, because what else are you even supposed to do in this situation

I read this speech bubble three times in a row very carefully this time around just to make sure I was reading the words right. and then looked for a T/L note below. and there was none. whatever RHA, at least you all are out here enjoying yourselves

wait what?

I guess he hasn’t woken up yet after all?? so then wtf is Deku’s Spidey Sense getting all worked up about. I mean to be fair there’s danger all around them still so having a Spidey Sense in this kind of situation is kind of like bringing a smoke alarm to a BBQ

now what

wait did he put them back in the marble?? or is that panel just meant to show us how they were in the marble earlier?? Horikoshi please make this less confusing, I’m already having trouble staying focused as it is. and on top of everything else Compress is cascading blood like Niagara Falls right now and I’m starting to wonder if you really are going to kill him off

anyway so Mirio is still in mid-punch, and now he’s reaching out to punch Spinner with his other hand. heh. Mirio please be careful Tomura is right there, and I swear to god Horikoshi IF HE LAYS A HAND ON HIS SWIRLY BLOND HEAD SO HELP ME I WILL MAIL YOU A VIAL OF MY TEARS

okay seriously what the hell is happening

when you attach?? everyone?? to your body?? whose body?? who is this??

oh wait okay it’s a flashback to Tomura talking about his Hands

lmao this is so disjointed, I can’t tell what’s a flashback and what isn’t and whose thoughts these are lmao I give up. I’m just going to fire up a bunch of question marks until this starts making some goddamn sense. ???????

??????

????????

-- !!!!!!!!!!!

okay hold up. so did Spinner just slap Tomura’s last remaining Signature Fashion Hand onto his face just now for absolutely no reason?? is that what’s going on?? and fuck me but it actually worked too, lmao. is your buddy unconscious and unresponsive to stimuli?? no problem, just slap ‘em in the face with a burnt and shriveled severed hand. works every time

p.s. I SWEAR TO GOD HORIKOSHI. IF YOU TOUCH MIRIO!!! HE’S A GOOD BOY LEAVE HIM ALONE

??????????

OKAY WELL. I STILL HAVE NO IDEA WTF IS HAPPENING, BUT AT LEAST MIRIO’S NOT DEAD. KACCHAN GOT BLOWN AWAY THOUGH SOB. HOW IRONIC THAT THE GOD OF EXPLOSION MURDERS WOULD BE MURDERED BY AN EXPLOSION WHILE I WAS BUSY SAYING “OH MY GOD”

ohhhhhh, okay. so this is AFO’s narration

and that’s a partial answer to the question of “why did AFO bother raising Tomura up as his heir if he was planning on taking over his body the whole time.” apparently it makes it easier to control him. joy :’)

also this image of a potato wearing a Tomura wig is sending me fjkllkhl

oh my god he summoned all the Noumu to him like Aquaman and his sea creatures. this whole situation just keeps on getting better

-- oh hell no. oh fuck me, fucking shit

SHIT SHIT SHIT. I’M SORRY SPINNER, TOMURA CAN’T COME TO THE PHONE RIGHT NOW

oh my god. I fucking hate everything right now oh my god

I GUESS WE FIGURED OUT WHAT DEKU’S SPIDEY SENSE WAS WARNING HIM ABOUT, THEN ಠ_ಠ

fucking great!! so I guess nobody is getting a happy ending today, then. the heroes got their asses handed to them (sorry Compress, it’s a figure of speech, didn’t mean to be disrespectful); Deku and Kacchan died; Shouto’s evil brother came back from the dead to ruin his life; everyone and their dog lost various limbs; and the villains have now lost Twice (dead), Compress and Machia (presumably going to be captured), and now their fearless leader’s body has been completely taken over by AFO, which is such an unsexy development that it managed to completely undo all of the Mr. Compress Sexiness from last week. goddamn it

DAMN IT HORIKOSHI ARE YOU REALLY GOING TO END IT LIKE THIS

up close Hadou’s face is looking pretty rough. :/ that’s going to scar over isn’t it. at least she’ll look like a badass

meanwhile I appreciate that Horikoshi drew what looks to be a little puff of air next to Kacchan’s mouth, just to reassure us all that he’s not actually dead. that’s fine. you just lie there then. also his wound really is in the exact same place as All Might’s and it’s giving me all kinds of feels you guys but whatever I’m not gonna sit here dwelling on it all day

AND POOR SHOUTO. IS HE STILL CRYING OMG. AND ENDEAVOR, WAY TO DO NOTHING STILL. THE ALL TIME CHAMP OF SITTING AROUND AND STARING, GOOD FOR YOU

ARE YOU FOR REAL, ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS RIGHT NOW

(－‸ლ)

lol

“peace out, loser.” “SHUT YOUR TRAP, HO.” quality encounter right here

anyway so he’s blasting Deku with something and Deku’s just flying back all unconscious-like. so then, what even was the point of all that, huh

oh I see, it was to lead us into one last Deku monologue to close this arc out

oh my god Deku if you say you’re going to save him I will turn around and do a cannonball into a ballpit of feels right now, don’t do this to me

OH SNAP I THINK HE’S GONNA THOUGH

DID HE LOOK LIKE HE NEEDED SAVING?? I MUST CONFESS YOU AND I ARE OF A MIND HERE, YOUNG BROCCOLI. YES IN SPITE OF ALL THE MURDERS. WHAT CAN I SAY IT’S COMPLICATED

by the way I just have to point out here, that after all of those impossibly pretty close-ups of Hawks’s unconscious face, Horikoshi really did my child dirty here lmao

he looks like a squished cockroach. THAT’S MY BABY BOY

and it looks like the cavalry is finally on its way too! took them long enough. so I guess they can take care of any of the remaining Noumu stragglers, but first let Deku finish his speech. listen up Deku I really need you to say something cool and iconic to cap off this thus-far admittedly underwhelming Last Chapter Of The Year, here

AHHHHHHH YES HE REALLY DID IT HE SAID THE THING

well he thought the thing, anyway. close enough. I’ll take it!

so this is really the end of the arc then! or at least I hope, good lord. anyways, all right then so let’s do a quick status check:

it looks like the Noumu are hauling Tomura and Spinner away to safety, but it doesn’t look like they managed to save Machia or Compress. this honestly might be in Compress’s best interests though. the heroes can get him some medical help along with Kacchan and Endeavor and everyone else

Dabi is apparently hidden inside Spinner’s scarf, but do they have any way of releasing him without Compress there to undo the quirk? will he be all right in there. like how is he going to get food and water and air and stuff lol. does it wear off after a bit? can Compress undo it when he wakes up, even if he’s in custody? is there a distance limit on it?

and Skeptic was presumably turned into a marble as well, but Compress didn’t bother mentioning him at all. nobody cares about poor Skeptic lol

and bonus AFO theories status check:

Dad for One - AFO called Deku worthless and hasn’t seemed to take the least bit of interest in him despite getting to see his fancy SIXQUIRKS up close and personal. so if he is his dad he sure as heck is a terrible one, that’s all I can say

All for One for All/Deku is a horcrux - well the Spidey Sense seems to offer an alternative explanation to why Deku could sense AFO’s presence, but on the other hand it doesn’t explain why AFO was able to sense Deku’s as well (seeing his dreams and such). still thinking there’s a connection there, guys, idk

AFO is the final villain - five words for you: “EVERYTHING IS FOR MY SAKE.” is that concrete enough yet lol. pretty sure this arc marked both the beginning and end of Tomura’s brief stint as the Big Bad. Deku’s got it in his mind to save him now somehow, and we all know what happens when Deku starts getting determined to save people. look out AFO

as for the heroes, they’re all varying degrees of Fucked and I think it’s honestly too much to even take stock of at this point. maybe if I get a rush of hyperfixation in the next couple days or so I’ll do a separate post analyzing the impact of this arc and where things currently stand and where they might be headed from here

but in the meantime, ngl, this chapter was kind of a hot mess lmao. but whatever, I don’t even care because at least he managed to get all of it done within the allotted 17 pages, meaning that next week (or rather two weeks from now, sob) we really can get moving onto the aforementioned Triage arc! BRING ON THAT ANGST. I am so fucking hyped goddammit

[immortalcoelacanth]

HLVRAI Oneshot: Chalk

My muse continues to be a stuggle, Snowcon followers I am sorry XD

Word count: 2687

Summary: Kids were easy to be around. Their minds were simple, focused on entertaining themselves and being happy. It was something Benrey could relate to. But sometimes they could be so damn observant… 

“You love dad, don’t you?”

“uhhh, sounds kinda cringe bro.”

The warm, summer winds blew through the surprisingly quiet neighborhood. Faint sounds of children laughing could be heard, most likely in the park not too far away, and the scent of smoke wafted off the barbeque Gordon was currently cooking food on. 

All and all, a pleasantly calm day. It was one that he could enjoy with his son-

“hey, hey, you wanna play some tic tac toe?”

And Benrey. 

The duo were both seated on the pavement not too far away, drawing on the ground with pieces of chalk that were all sorts of colours. Benrey was wearing a rather large hoodie with some game logos and stickers plastered across it, and his security helmet of course. From his position, Gordon could see that Joshua had drawn several stars, a rainbow, and several other miscellaneous drawings. Benrey had, after being scolded several times to not eat the chalk, drawn what appeared to be colourful smears across the ground, mixing and blending them together. 

It sort of reminded Gordon of Benrey’s sweet voice, the blues that were present and the general colour gradient. He was glad to see everything was calm, nothing bad had happened, but still felt the urge to check. 

“You two still holding up good?” 

“Yeah dad!”

“we’re just doodlin’ passports over here, bro. josh dude gave himself a neat stache.” 

“It’s a rainbow mustache that’s extra swirly.” The young boy sagely nodded. “Benrey says it needs glitter though to look super nice.”

“gotta make it sparkly like your personality, little dude.” 

Joshua grinned and started laughing while Gordon could not stop himself from smiling at the rather wholesome sight. While Benrey was his typical somewhat apathetic self, his words were far more cohesive, and he sounded less… flustered when speaking. His words were less frantic, far calmer. 

Like he was truly relaxed. 

“Alright.” Gordon nodded as he turned his attention back to the barbeque, not wanting the veggies to burn while he was not paying attention. “Benrey just… keep not eating the chalk, please.”

He did not notice the wink that the ex-security guard sent Joshua, nor did he witness Benrey pull out half a piece of blue chalk from his pocket and carefully crunch into it. 

Blue tasted the best, it was like gatorade. 

The young boy laughed once more before returning to his doodling. Benrey looked at it for a moment, noticing the blue, orange, and yellow pieces of chalk that were clearly intended for whatever it was he was drawing, but Benrey decided not to question it at the moment. 

Joshua would more than likely ramble about it at some point, the kid was full of all sorts of words and tended to ramble to whoever was nearby. It was pretty amusing to listen to and gave him all sorts of insight on both Gordon and what the pair’s home life had been like before he crashed into it. 

Literally. 

Breaking into someone’s apartment at around three in the morning was not the best of plans, especially since it ended with Gordon bringing a bat down on the top of his helmet. Not that Benrey had been hurt of course. 

Seeing Gordon’s dismay and shock as the bat snapped in half and flew off to the side, shattering one of the windows, was hilarious. 

Had that been Benrey’s fault? 

Maaaaybeeee. 

Either way, months had passed since that point. Months spent working on building up Gordon’s trust in him, learning how to do human things like buy groceries that were not just soda. 

A shame since Benrey loved that gamer fuel. 

Getting to know Joshua had been… nice, too. The young boy never had the same anxieties that his father felt, never worried about whether Benrey would hurt him or not. He had been happy to make a new friend who was willing to listen to him ramble and play games with him. Of course, Gordon had not been happy with the developing friendship between the two, but as the months passed… 

Gordon had gone from constantly hovering over them, to occasionally checking in on them, and then finally to trusting Benrey.

Trusting him to watch over his son and not hurt him.

The first time Benrey had noticed this change and realized what it meant; it had been impossible to stop the bright pink orbs that left his mouth. Fortunately, Gordon had not noticed the sweet voice, but Joshua had. 

Joshua, who had later told him how pretty the “glowing balls” looked and how it resembled a very nice, peachy pink. 

Kids could be so blunt sometimes, but Benrey appreciated it. He appreciated how simple and straightforward their minds could be and while curiosity was a constant factor when dealing with a kid, it was an enjoyable part of talking to them. 

Like making a baking soda volcano on the ceiling of Gordon’s apartment. 

Fun times, especially with the bout of strangely quietly screaming he had gotten in response. 

Benrey didn’t know Gordon’s face could turn that red. 

He let out an amused chuckle and drew some loops on the ground with his mostly eaten piece of chalk. He loved getting Gordon so riled up, hearing the insults that were thrown his way and how the agitated man would run his hands through his hair, ruffling it up. 

Loved watching his face flush with anger, how his eyes shined with rage… 

Unnoticed to Benrey, several pink orbs floated out of his mouth as he sighed wistfully. When he realized what he had done, clamping a hand over his mouth to prevent any more from appearing, he noticed that Joshua was staring at him, grinning. 

Shit, one of the things he was actually scared of. 

“heyyyyy little joshie buddy, what’s with that look? kinda… kinda looks like a schemin’ look.” 

Joshua’s smile grew a bit wider. “Maaaybe.”

“... kid you’re scarin’ me.” 

The only response he got to that was a giggling laugh that was part cackle, which left him feeling no less concerned than he had previously been. Benrey sighed and refocused on his random doodling. Yep, just going to let this topic drop-

“You love dad, don’t you?”

Shit.

Benrey looked up and pretended he could not feel the sweat running down his face. Everything was totally fine, he was cool as a cucumber, kid couldn’t suspect a thing… 

“uhhh, sounds pretty cringe, bro.” He shrugged. “and gay.”

“Dad likes all sorts of people!” Joshua huffed. “He likes gay!”

“... that wasn’t-uh... never mind.” Oh fuck, was he blushing? He hoped not. “still cringe, not a pro gamer move.”

“You blushing when dad says something nice about you isn’t cringe.” Joshua bluntly stated. “It’s cute, and grandpa Coomer says gay stuff is cute! Grandpa Coomer’s super smart so it’s gotta be true!” 

“we-well it’s… uh…” Shit, he had no response to that. 

“Dad makes you happy.” Joshua continued to say, now refocusing on his doodle on the ground and Benrey could now see that it was a family of three people. One blue, one orange, and the smallest one was yellow. “Even if you’re weird sometimes, and pour milk in the cereal box before you eat it-”

“fruit loops get super dusty and i wanted to make soup.” 

“Cereal isn’t soup!”

“it is if you’re brave enough.” The change in topic was helping Benrey relax, tension leaving his shoulders as his absent-minded smile returned to his face. Nothing to stress over, everything was chill and-

“So when are you and dad going to go out on a date?”

Nope no more chill nope nope nope-

A date? Benrey had no clue how dates worked, or how they were supposed to work. Besides, his attempts at “flirting” were rarely successful and only seemed to wind Gordon up and, as much as he enjoyed watching the results, sometimes Gordon’s remarks would… sting. 

They would make him hurt, cause him to cringe and recoil from the conversation. Not that such a thing had happened recently, but Benrey knew how unpredictable Gordon’s mood and temperament could be at times. 

“sounds super cringe.” Was the response Joshua got, combined with a tense shrug. “like-like over nine thousand level cringer-”

“That’s an oooooooold reference.” The young boy said as he stuck his tongue out at Benrey. “And you’re changing topics again!”

Oh god, there were now hearts scribbled around the doodles that were clearly supposed to be him and Gordon. What could he say, what was he supposed to say? That he was terrified of fucking up the “Good Ending” he had finally achieved? That he did not want to risk destroying the relationship he currently had with Gordon?

The months of hard work he had put into fixing the damage that had been done because of that stupid, stupid game-

He felt the chalk in his grip crumble and break apart due to how tightly he was holding it, but the thing that snapped him out of his reverie was the sensation of a smaller hand grabbing onto his. 

Joshua?

Indeed, Joshua had scooted over and reached out to hold onto his hand. He looked up at Benrey with a warm smile on his face. 

A smile he had seen many times from the boy’s father… 

“If it’s hard to say it, why don’t you show you!” He suggested, still smiling that same smile. “Dad’ll understand! He gets my drawings all the time!” 

Benrey felt his lips quirk up into the faintest hint of a grin at the suggestion, the tips of sharp teeth glinting in the sunlight. “you sure that’s a pro gamer move?”

“Yup! It’s super pro gamer!” 

“well, guess i’ve got no choice.” Benrey joked while rolling his tense shoulders. “joshie, toss me that orange one.” 

“And blue?”

“you know it.”

As the sun started to descend from its zenith, shadows beginning to stretch across the pavement in front of the apartment building, Gordon finished up his cooking. Everything was stacked on plates and brought over to his, thankfully, ground level room and placed inside. Once that was taken care of, he went about cleaning everything up and putting his barbeque away. 

He was so focused on cleaning everything up that he did not notice the large drawing that was progressively covering the pavement thanks to Benrey. It was only after all signs of his cooking had been neatly cleaned up or put away that he turned his attention to Joshua and his… “roommate”.

If he could call Benrey that.

“Time to head inside!” Gordon called out as he walked towards the duo. His walking slowed down as he noticed that Benrey was crouched in front of a large piece of chalk art. His eyes narrowed in confusion. 

Huh, he had not expected Benrey to be the artistic type, aside from spitting balls into the air. 

Joshua jumped up and rushed to his side, grabbing onto his arm, and tugging him towards Benrey. 

“C’mon dad, look! It’s so cool!”

“Alright, slow down there Joshie.” Gordon chuckled as he allowed his son to pull him towards the art. “It wouldn’t be good if… I… tripped….”

His words slowed and eventually stopped entirely as he finally took in the sight of what Benrey had created and it was…

Beautiful. 

Very abstract in nature, a swirl of colours that seemed to form shapes. Light blues and yellows and greens all circling and intermingling with a core that consisted of a darker, richer blue and orange. 

Swirls and lines that worked together to create faces. His own and Benrey’s. He could also make out what appeared to be Coomer and Bubby in the background, green and light blue seeming to dance together like the pair would, and that warm yellow that encircled them all, Tommy, uniting them. 

What…

As he leaned closer, Gordon noticed smaller details. How Benrey had drawn his hair to be similar to what it truly looked like despite the effort it must have taken. The dark shadows that had been scratched under the ex-guard’s eyes, the white and yellow that mixed together, an attempt to recreate his glowing irises. 

How monstrous he looked overall and yet there was a softness in the lines, and the trail of bubbles that left the drawing’s mouth. 

All a familiar pink. 

Benrey was not as slick as he thought he was, Gordon had noticed the colourful orbs on multiple occasions before he had successfully stopped them. He had never pushed the boundary and asked what they meant since Benrey always seemed so embarrassed, but now…  

“What’s pink translate to?” He asked, crouching down beside Benrey and bumping his shoulder against the other man. 

Benrey was silent, contemplating what to say and how to say it, before he finally mumbled out the answer. “.... s’makes me think.”

“... Pink means you think?”

“yeah,” Benrey shifted and looked up at Gordon, eyes still cast in shadow. “think of you.”

Gordon’s mind drew a blank at that answer, uncertain of how to respond, but before he could even attempt to get the words out the other man took his chance. 

He leaned towards Gordon and pressed a gentle kiss against his lips. 

The gesture did not linger, but as Benrey leaned back Gordon could still feel the warmth of the kiss. He reached up and pressed his fingers against his lips and quietly wondered if he was dreaming. 

Benrey sighed, a stream of pink sweet voice floating into the air and waited for Gordon to speak. It felt like an eternity had passed before the other man finally responded to the gesture, voice cracking. 

“Y-You… really? Me? What? But… but you and I-”

“had problems?” Benrey interrupted, eyes fixating on the ground as he squeezed his hands. “no shit. feetman, if-if you don’t wanna-”

“Who said I didn’t?” At that, he looked up and stared at Gordon in surprise. “I was just surprised since you hadn’t said anything about that.”

“i joked about putting our minecraft beds together, bro.” Benrey bluntly stated, causing Gordon to flail as he struggled to explain himself. 

“WELL YEAH! But… but I thought you were joking and shit-”

“Dollar for the swear jar!” Joshua cheerfully interrupted, making his dad groan.

“Okay, dollar later, but first,” He focused his attention back on Benrey, noticing how the other man’s cheeks had darkened and how he kept fidgeting. “... You sure?”

“wouldn’t have asked if i wasn’t.” Benrey quietly commented, now finally looking back at Gordon. “psh, pretty cringe doubting me-”

But he was cut off when Gordon leaned forward and returned the kiss. Joshua cheered and Benrey, completely caught off guard, fell backwards which caused a chain reaction of Gordon stumbling, fumbling, and nearly landing on top of him. 

Gordon’s hands rested on the pavement beside Benrey’s shoulders as Gordon stared into the other man’s eyes. Both were blushing at this point, and a constant stream of pink sweet voice was leaking into the air. 

“U-Uh-”

“dude, you gonna-”

“Are you guys gonna kiss again?” Joshua’s innocent question snapped the pair out of their stupor and they scrambled to get back up. 

“W-Well, probably-”

“later, joshie bro.” That casual smile was back on Benrey’s face, an attempt at trying to look calm despite how much he was blushing. “we gotta… uh… get the meats’n stuff-”

“Yeah, like Arby’s!” Gordon nervously added. “But first…”

He quickly snapped several photos of the drawing Benrey had done on the pavement, also making sure to get several of Joshua’s in the process. Hey, he wanted to be able to look back on it in the future, plus he was certain some asshole would wash it off the pavement soon enough. 

Besides, there was no way in hell he wanted Benrey’s hard work, one of the few examples of hard work, to go to waste. 

“Okay, now we can get the meats.” 

Joshua cheered and raced over to the apartment while Benrey joined his side, an arm brushing against him. In response, Gordon linked an arm with his and smiled at the other man. 

“wow, that… that’s pretty gay, bro. You gayman now?”

“Totally.” Gordon rolled his eyes as he walked arm and arm back to the apartment with Benrey. 

                                    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I continue to be on my bullshit while my muse demands domestic fluff for these two. I suppose it’s a good thing for my followers who are in this fandom XD

I hope you guys enjoyed reading!

- ImmortalCoelacanth

[moonlightcrossesonyourbody]

Words, Nerves and Cigarettes

Hiiii!!!! So, this is for the wonderful @liglitterbug to whom I promised a story for a prompt for helping me out and finding me that story I was looking for obsessively. The prompt was basically h/c and dyslexic Steve with Harringrovre which like, one my favourite things EVER!! This is pre-slash. There are a couple anxiety attack scenes that are pretty graphic. More warnings in the tags.

 Without further ado here we go!!

Okay. So Steve knew he wasn’t the smartest guy in the block. He knew that he was surrounded by people who could think circles around him on any given topic okay? He knew that. And he wasn’t bitter. No he had accepted long ago, when Mrs Johnson asked him to read out loud in 6th grade and he almost had a damn panic attack and had to feign feeling lightheaded- which honestly, not that much feigning there- that school and all that academic mambo jumbo just wasn’t for him.

His dad certainly made sure he understood just how stupid and incompetent and Jesus, Steven, you’re so damn lazy why can’t you just apply yourself, son? he was. Back when he was still young enough that his parents missing parent-teacher night would be frowned upon in the polite company of Hawkin’s upper class, a couple of his teachers would throw around, in lower tones, like a dirty little secret, words like testing and dyslexia and it’s not his fault, it’s just...his brain. That was always sure to get his father going and start threatening in hushed tones about incompetent teachers and funding and do you even know how to work with kids, he’s just damn lazy. So eventually the teachers stopped mentionning it. He never forgot that word though.

He looked it up in the school library one day when Tommy and Carol where to occupied sucking each other’s faces and too high to notice him gone anyway. He thought he might have it. Dyslexia that is. It made sort of sense anyway, as much as anything could make sense in his head, especially these days. The book said things like jumbled words and trouble reading and spelling and backwards letters like b and d...or d and b. Something anyway. And it all felt pretty familiar and it was comforting for a while, cause the book also had this section about coping mechanisms. Sounding the words out slowly, or spelling them or writing them down. Having someone read to him worked the best though and when Carol was in a giving enough mood and Tommy wasn’t around and he widened his eyes and pouted his lips just enough, she’d read the homework out loud to him. And then Nancy came.

Sweet, understanding, beautiful, smart Nancy who was determined to help him make sense of his stupid brain. She’d read to him and show him how to take notes so he’d need the books less and explain to him stuff that he just couldn’t get. But then their world turned literally upside down and school kinda went into the back and Nancy left him and then he had the kids to take care of, because he had to keep them safe, he had to. God knows he couldn’t help with anything else. So he patrolled the woods and picked them up and from wherever those little nerds-geniuses- were everyday. Cause he could do that at least. He wasn’t like Dustin who was the smartest person he had ever known, who had a science based explanation for everything.Or Nancy and Jonathan and Hopper who connected all the dots and where always, like, fifteen steps ahead of him.Or Mike who always had a plan for every damn contnigency.

Mike, who was currently looking at him like he bit into something sour-which honestly was turning into the kid’s default expression right along with those eyes that he was currently rolling at him and Jesus his face was gonna get stuck like that and then he would- Jesus dammit Steve focus. He tried to go back on his train of thought, which, honestly more like a trainwreck of a thought, and figure out why Mike was currently making that face at him.

“Jesus Christ, Steve, are you gonna ever roll or fucking what?” exclaimed the kid and-

“ Hey, language-” Steve started saying and oh my god what happened to him, before he remembered that they were playing the nerds’ stupid game Gorgons and Caves or what the fuck ever. Which you know. Speaking of trainwrecks. So he rolled and landed a fourteen and Mike started spouting of some bullshit that he couldn’t hope to understand even if he was focused and not sleep deprived, which speaking of, Jesus he hadn’t slept more than five hours since Wednesday, and what day was it again and-

“ Oh my God, Dude are you fucking stupid? We’ve explained this a thousand fucking times, just read your damn character sheet and make a stupid move, come on!!” Which, okay ouch, Mike fuck you very much, he didn’t even wanna play the stupid game, but Dustin was begging and the kid thinks he’s cool and he can’t say no to him and-

“Oh, my God Mike can you  just fucking chill he was probably bored of your stupid voice-” Max started yelling and there was that word again stupid, stupid, stupid, and the kids were yelling now and-

“Okay, Okay, Jesus, hold your damn panties, Wheeler, here.” he pulled his character sheet off the floor where he had let it drop during the kids’ last yelling match, jesus do they yell, and he squinted at the page. “ Okay, so, umm...I...umm, I have that back up spell right? So I, ah, I’m gonna give that to Will...?” he trailed off, lifting his eyes to look at the rest of the kids around the table.

“Oh my God, Steve come on you have to read the spell,come on.” Mike said while heaving a big, great, sigh. “ See I told you guys, he wouldn’t get it, he’s only slowing us down-”

“Jesus, Mike shut up! How can he read if you’re always yelling at him, he’s new at this and just needs some time to concentrate, not everyone’s brain works the same. Come on buddy just read the spell like we practiced,” Dustin turned his big eyes at him and gave him that damn ridiculous smile and Jesus that’s were he’s at right now, his best friend is also his cheerleader and his mom who is also a fucking thirteen year old. 

He looked back down at the sheet and tried to read the stupid spell, but he couldn’t find where the damn word was, and the letters were dancing all over the page, and none of the words made sense anyway and he couldn’t sound them out, never mind spelling them and, was that an upside down question mark what the fuck? Oh wait no that’s an f, the spell started with an f- right?

“Okay, umm, I wanna give Will, a fu-, an umm, a fra..for,” He was stuttering, he knew he was stuttering, goddammit, and he was starting to sweat, the back of his neck was on fire, and there was no air in this stupid basement, and none of the words made sense, and his stupid brain couldn’t process anything, and his leg was jittering and his nails were digging into the meat of his palm were he had his hand fisted on his lap,

and the kids were all looking at him,

and Mike was rolling his eyes,

and Dusting was looking at him all supportive like,

and Max was looking at him like she knew, and her moth was forming a soft, quiet oh,

and he couldn’t breathe.

Out. He needed out, NOW.

He stood up abruptly, his knees knocking into the low wooden table they were playing on, almost knocking Mike’s book fortress on the floor, and he was getting tunnel vision, his hands fumbled in his pockets, searching for the cigarettes he wasn’t carrying anymore, cause it wasn’t good for the kids and-

“ Umm, I’m just,..I’m just gonna go get some... get some water,isn’t it...isn’t it hot in here, get some umm some air” he stuttered out, hand finding the nearest wall, stumbling his way towards the staircase, damn it all to fucking hell why stairs? 

“ What?!” Dustin exclaimed “Steeeeve, come on it was just about to get good-”

He cut Dustin off “ Anybody want anything?” he rushed out, the words coming out with a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. He risked a glance round the table and saw Max looking at him like she understood, and she nodded her head at him toward the stairs.

“ I want some juice” She said calmly. 

Mike opened his mouth as if to argue, and she must have seen something on Steve’s face cause she was turning toward the boy, with a thunderous expression on her face and-

“ Oh My God, Mike! What the hell is your problem, he gave the damn spell to Will, just go on, you little asshole-” and that girl deserved the world.

He could hear Mike’s screech of indignation as he flayed his way up the stairs, opened the door and exited that stupid, suffocating basement, trying to catch his breath, as he made his way towards the front door, mostly blindly, mainly on instinct, feeling like his face was on fire and his hands were shaking and 

stupid, stupid, stupid, you panic because of a game with fucking pre-teens, what the hell is wrong with you, you stupid - stuttered breath-

pathetic- just a couple more steps-

useless- his hand was on the handle-

embarrassing-he wrenched the door open- 

-and promptly run into a wall.

“Jesus fuck, what the Hell?!” Someone exclaimed, as hands went on his bicep and hip steading him, his arms trapped between them, hands on a firm chest, half-clutching an open shirt, mostly pawing at warm, golden skin, golden necklace catching on the reflecting porchlight, his stupid brain going a mile a minute-

-oh hell. 

He raised his eyes, meeting twin night sky blue pools- no, no wait not pools, pools were bad and death and guilt and monsters and we killed he-

“ Okay there amigo?” Billy asked, eyebrow raised, arms still holding him, burning, scorching him, and his breath hit his face, smelling strongly like cigarette smoke and faintly of something sweet, saccharin, snapping him back to the moment and Jesus, they were standing so close, practically sharing air, that Steve couldn’t take in and he was burning and

“ Yougotanysmokes?” he rushed out, and tried to swallow, throat working, while he was still trying to draw breath, which was maybe a little easier now, with Billy’s scorching, rough hands feeling like a brand on the skin of his arm and the sliver of skin where the fabric of his shirt had bunched up on his hip, where Billy was still steading, grounding him.

“I sure do” he said stepping back, taking his hands and all their fire away, second eyebrow climbing up to meet the first. “Wanna bum one, King?” he said, devil’s smirk appearing, making the statement sound suggestive, 

smug asshole, Steve thought.

“Umm, ye- yeah.” He got out, clearing his throat and looking everywhere but at Billy.  

“ They’re in the car.” He turned around, making towards the Camaro, and of course they were. Where would he even keep them on him, it was finally warm enough that jackets weren’t a necessity and he must be barely able to breathe in those jeans, never mind shove things down the pockets- Jesus ,Steve, focus he thought to himself aggressively, blushing again, and heart stuttering, for entirely different reasons that he wasn’t examining too closely right now cause seriously fuck that.

He looked back and found Billy looking at him over his shoulder, devil smirk still there, porchlight and moonlight catching on his curls and on the angles of his face making him look like one of those marble statues in his history book, if you looked past that infuriating smirk and that glint in his eyes that spelled only trouble.

“You coming, or am I fetching them and lighting one for you, King Steve?” he drawled slowly, tongue appearing and glistening while wetting his lips.

does that thing ever stay inside his mouth? he thought and then snapped back to himself, shaking his head to clear it, and started to move towards the car.

“Yeah, no, ah, yeah, yeah I’m coming.” he said and Billy hummed behind his smirk and turned back around and made for the driver’s side, Steve following him this time, heart still beating faster than it should be and the previous anxiety and panic that chased him away from the kids and that damn basement still simmering in the forefront of his thoughts. 

By the time he had reached him Billy had already got his packet out, and had a cigarette dangling on his lips, driver’s door shut, the hand with the packet extended towards Steve, while the other held his lighter, as he made his way towards the front of the car.

When he reached Steve, Billy got between him and the bumper of the car. Steve swallowed on reflex while Billy’s arms reached behind him and he leaned back on them, hips jutting out and the fabric of his sleeves straining, and then he gave a small jump, landing on the hood of the Camaro with a grace that Steve would hardly possess in general, never mind now with his nerves wrecked as they were.

Billy lied back on the hood of his car, golden/sliver curls creating a hallo around his head, eyes closed and smoke going up, up ,up from the cigarette Steve didn’t even notice him lighting up, arms going behind his head, knees bent and exposed torso shining. 

He looks like a giant cat. Steve thought as he saw him stretch and hum, shiny midnight blue hood contrasting against the reds and golds of his skin and clothes.

He turned his head slightly towards Steve’s general direction, his eyes opened half-hooded and hazy behind the smoke of his cigarette. The cigarette he was now grinning around, the jackass. More like a lion then. Or a tiger, but definitely a predator, instead of a house pet. Like Mews 2.. or was it Tews? The one the monster didn’t eat anyway and nope. Nope. Nope. Not thinking about that right now. No.  

Steve, still trying to avoid that anxiety attack he has been trying to restrain since Mike opened his stupid mouth and his stupid brain stopped working, let out a quiet breath and rolled his eyes, when Billy lifted one eyebrow again and glanced at the packet now lying on the hood of the car next to his hip.

He reached for the packet and pulled a cigarette out, rolling it across his lips, before setting it in the middle while he searched for the lighter he still always carried on him. He lit it up, put the lighter away, safely inside his jeans’ pocket, got the cigarette back in his fingers and climbed next to Billy on the hood. He looked toward the other boy but Billy’s eyes were closed again, smoke slowly drifting up, up, up from his blowing mouth, so he mimed his stance and laid back. One hand pillowing his head, but he didn’t close his eyes, opting instead to turn to the boy next to him. 

He looked like he was sunbathing in the moonlight, greedy even with light, drawing toward him any light source there was in the bleakness of the early Midwest spring, sucking it all in or maybe better, absorbing it, and while he was watching mesmerized the rise and fall of his naked, sculpted chest, Steve wondered, when exactly, sitting in silence with Billy Hargrove, became the silent comfort of his mess of a life.

It was comfortable now. It wasn’t comfortable at the start. Not for Steve at least. He pushed through the nerves and the wariness and yes, the fear, cause Billy Hargrove wasn’t the only stubborn bastard, this side of the country. But he was dangerous. And as much as Steve liked to tell the kids that the demon dogs from Hell were by far the sole scary thing that night, he could admit it. Quietly. To himself. In the privacy of his jumbled, stupid head that Billy’s rage and raw, unstoppable force of power and anger that night were just us terrifying.

But he apologized. And Steve hadn’t slept well since October of last year and he just didn’t have the energy to hold a grudge. He was never good at it anyway. So he nodded his head and mumbled a ‘whatever dude’ and looked away. But the asshole wouldn’t leave, and then he offered him a cigarette and Nancy hated those and they weren’t good for the kids, but he hadn’t slept in ages and he remembered what the burn of nicotine felt like when it travelled down his lungs and suddenly he found himself unable to say anything but yes. 

So he started smoking with Billy Hargrove. While waiting on the kids if the weather was good. After practice sometimes. And it was nice. It quieted his head. Cause Billy was very calm when he wasn’t raging and halfway out of his goddamned mind. Or maybe not calm, exactly, cause he was always there, like, like a palpable energy, like...like what the sea must be like not still itself but calming for you like the open ocean. The ocean that Steve had never seen but Billy was missing like a phantom limb, the ocean he decided to carry along with him to the dry, dirty Midwest, that stole it from him.

He took another breath, filling his lungs with smoke that burned. Burned but not like the fire in the tunnels burning something to death alive, or like bullshit or like we’re in love or like his eyes did when he was trying to make it up the stairs, like stupid, stupid, stupid, cotton-mouth, stutters, like Max’s eyes on the back of his burning neck. Not like Billy’s hands on his skin. He exhaled slowly. Letting the smoke drift out into the night. Closed his eyes.

“You good now?” Billy’s low baritone, broke the silence, snapping Steve out of his head. He opened his eyes and looked at the other boy who had, at some point turned his head towards him, eyebrow raised again and eyes inquiring but tone surprisingly -or maybe not- not mocking.

“I..ah..eghem” Steve cleared his throat “ Yeah. Yeah I’m fine” he said all the while looking at Billy, cheshire, catlike smirk slowly spreading across face.

“ That you are alright, pretty boy.” He said in that tone he always used to charm girls and moms and teachers, and Steve turned his head away looking back up at the sky and thanked God for the darkness that hopefully would cover the fire in his face. This shit was getting tiring, what the hell was wrong with him- 

“ But are you okay?” Billy asked again snapping Steve out of his thoughts that were going downhill for the millionth time that night. The sincerity in his voice threw Steve off for a second and he turned to look at him and found it in equal measures on his face. He swallowed past the sudden lump in his throat and wondered for the hundredth time since Billy Hargrove’s Heartfelt Apology Tour of 1985 how exactly he had managed to find yet another person who could see right through him. 

“I’m gonna be” He said surprisingly heartfelt and sincerely. Quietly. Billy’s eyes searched his face for a second, trying to find signs of dishonesty or maybe something else entirely. He slowly blew the smoke he was holding out and as it danced across his face while it was traveling up, up, up to meet the moon whose rays Billy was bathing in, his expression softened and his lips ticked up minutely in a smile so soft and almost... almost tender and Steve’s breath caught in his chest again in a different, surprisingly more welcome, flattering,butterfly like panic.

A second, a breath, less than a heartbeat later Billy seemed to have found whatever answers to whatever questions he was searching for in Steve’s face. He nodded slowly. Curtly. And he turned his face back towards the moonlight rays that went back to licking the sharp planes of his cheekbones casting shadows from his eyelashes. Claiming him as theirs.

He hummed. 

He exhaled.

“ I need to get Max back to the house.” He said with an apologetic sort of finality.

And whatever spell the moonlight and the smoke and the ocean, midnight blue of the Camaro had cast was broken.

He made to get up and Steve almost lost his balance with how quickly he made to get up. Because in a twisted superstition he believed in, in that moment that if he was the one to get up, maybe-

maybe time would freeze. Maybe he would be able to preserve the image or whatever mirage the moonlight and the smoke had created and Billy would be imprinted on his memory as the calming, solid...dangerous, presense laying against the hood of the ocean that he drove.

Maybe some of that calm would seep into Steve’s brain that constantly betrayed him.

So he got up, rushed out a jumbled “ Imagoget’em ” and started towards the door. he reached it, opened it and when he was inside turned around, looked at Billy, forever young and laying on his thunderous ocean and waiting.

He got back down, the sounds of the kids still yelling piercing through whatever fog -peace- had surrounded him and he started, like he just woke up. 

Max’s juice. He doubled back towards the kitchen, grabbed a juice box and sprinted towards the stairs. He was climbing down when Will noticed him first letting out a “ Steve!” and then closing his mouth with a click, an apologetic look on his face when all the rugrats turned their heads towards him and started yelling. Steve gave him a little smile to let him know that it was okay.

“ My juice!” Max exclaimed and got up with the same grace her brother possessed and made her way to him, arms outstretched. When she had the plastic straw in her mouth she mumbled a quick “thanks” to him before her voice was drowned out by Mike’s yelling as he bulldozed his way towards Steve.

“You missed all the rest of the campaign! We need your stupid character to finish this off come on!” He said petulantly as he shoved his character sheet and the dice in his hands. 

Steve looked down and gulped when he saw all the jumbled words and felt all the kids’ eyes on him. He could feel his chest constricting, the previous panic that smoke and moonlight had chased away slowly coming back to reclaim its spot.

“-umm...I”

“Max.”

A hand came up and squeezed the back of his neck. He let out a stuttered breath and turned to his left to see Billy standing there.

“ Time to get back.” he said and the kids broke out in protests and moans of “noooooo”

He looked at the juice box in Max’s hands and turned to face Steve, devil’s smirk appearing.

“You their servant now, King Steve?” he said in a tone more teasing than mocking, tongue sweeping across his lips and eyes glinting.

“Fuck off” Steve said while rolling his eyes. He leaned back into the hand still at the back of his neck, trying to match his breaths to the rise and fall of Billy’s chest, while trying not to look like he was, like, ogling the guy. “ I just got Max a juice, man”.

“Oh, so you’re her maid then, huh, Harrington?” Billy went on teasing and nodded towards Max’s general direction, not taking his eyes off of Steve or letting up the pressure on his neck.

Steve looked back at Max and winked “ Your sister’s a gift Hargrove” 

Billy snorted and raised a hand to point,” Baby Byers over there is a gift” he said and send a wink at Will’s direction, who promptly blushed all the way to his ears and suddenly found the tablecloth in front of him fascinating, the poor kid,

“Maxine” he drawled looking back between the two of them “ is a beast.” he said around a smirk that turned into a toothy grin with Max’s indignant “ Hey!”

Steve hummed and acted like he was thinking about it and then looked at Max with a conspiratory grin and pointed at her “ But she’s a badass”

“ HA!” yelled Max while raising her juice box in a toast towards Steve proudly and looked around at the rest of the boys to see if any of them cared to contest that statement. Obviously none did. Lucas nodded vigorously and agreed, Will smiled at the tablecloth while sending furtive glances Billy’s way still very much on fire, Dustin accepted the statement with grace and Mike continued to look like he had bit into a lemon.

Steve saw Billy roll his eyes playfully while the kids were busy talking over each other and looking Max’s way with a relatively fond expression he wouldn’t have been caught dead with a few months ago.

He saw Steve staring at him and winked and Steve suddenly found himself sympathizing with Will, cleared his throat and looking away.

“ Dustin we should get going too, your mom wants you back by nine.” he said with what he prayed was enough authority to sway the knuckleheads and turned to Will “ Your brother picking you up?”

“Yeah he’s coming later.” Will finally lifted his head and mumbled.

Billy suddenly took his hand off of Steve and glanced at his watch. 

“Max. Get going.” he said with finality. He looked at Steve. “ Pretty Boy.” he said with a smirk and clapped him on the shoulder as he made his way back up the stairs. Max rolled her eyes at her brother’s back, but put her shoes on, grabbed her bag, said a bye to the boys and followed him.

“I’m ready, BYE guys!!” said Dustin and started tagging at Steve’s sleeve to get him moving. Steve gave a salute that Will smiled at, Lucas returned and Mike, unsurprisingly, rolled his eyes at but nodded in their general direction so you know, progress, and they started climbing up the stairs. 

They got out of the house and in the car just as Billy and Max were pulling out of the driveway and Steve stared as the blue of the Camaro slowly became one with the darkness of the horizon.

“Steve!” Dustin snapped him out of his thoughts “ Are you gonna stay for dinner, Mom made lasagna and I know you love them. You should stay and celebrate. That spell you gave Will literally saved the whole village” he said in a pointed and encouraging voice, “ Mike’s just an asshole don’t listen to him he’s just pissed cause El wasn’t allowed to come and Nancy’s always blowing him off and he’s jealous that she won’t play with us but you do, even if you’re new at this and you don’t really have the hung of it- but you will don’t worry, cause you’re really smart and -”

“Dustin!” Steve cut him and his flayling word vomit off “ It’s fine, it was fine, it was fun you know, it was great” he said and hoped that Dustin didn’t see through the lie even though he found himself believing it a little. Don’t get him wrong the anxiety attack wasn’t fun but the rest of the evening, listening to the kids bicker and laugh and then smoking with Billy....

yeah. It wasn’t all bad.

Dustin was looking at him expectantly beetle eyes shining in the dark, toothy grin splitting his face in two and Steve caught himself smiling back and wondering what the hell this kid ever saw in him and thought he was so cool. He found himself grateful anyway.

“ Yeah, yeah I’ll stay for dinner, kid” he said fondly and reached over and messed his hand through Dustin’s curly hair. The kid just gave him a big smile.

“Oh my God I love this song!” Dustin yelled excitedly and reached to turn the radio up. Steve started driving, breathing, finally normal and hummed along with Dustin’s excited singing

Someone told me long ago

There's a calm before the storm

I know, it's been comin' for some time. 

 When it's over, so they say

It will rain a sunny day

I know, shinin' down like water.

I wanna know, have you ever seen the rain? ....

[chasseurdeloup-retired]

Pour Some Salt on Me || Matty and Kaden

TIMING: Present LOCATION: Soul on the Rocks PARTIES: @likeamattoutofhell and @chasseurdeloup SUMMARY: Matty meets Kaden at the bar and deals with some of his baggage. AKA: Did someone order a Margarita? Extra salty?

It wasn’t often that Kaden spent a free night at a bar that wasn’t the Silver Bullet but he was always up for something new and different. Plus, for all he knew, he could be walking into a prime opportunity for hunting. Not to mention, he could always use a few more drinks to deal with everything that had happened in the past week. Mimes. Wings. Banshees. Werewolves. It was too much. He could use a normal night. The bar was loud. Very loud. It was going to take a lot for him to concentrate on any conversation and not get overwhelmed. He took a deep breath. It’d be fine, as long as he was prepared. He saw a guy at the bar, pretty sure on the end he was supposed to meet him. “You Matty?” he asked. “Kaden. Aka that guy whose dog found a fucking head the other week.” He almost added ‘not a mime-fucker’ but then he thought better of reminding anyone of that before needed. “How’s it going?

So. This had been a day, hadn’t it? Or, well. A night. But, at least some shit didn’t change. Soul on the Rocks was still standing, and nobody gave a crap how you came. Which was good, given that Matty looked a little like a half-drowned poodle, his hair still damp and curling, crazily, from his make-do shower at the pool. Whatever it took. Bit into his budget a little - man, everything cost more, these days - but he was two rounds into the special, and had enough left over for a few more. Solid. He’d just raised a hand for another when some… guy, sleek, sharp-faced, dropped onto the stool next-door. Kaden? Right. Maybe into mimes? According to the internet, but. Couldn’t believe everything you read, duh. “Yeah, that’s - yeah.” The vibes, on this poor bastard. “It’s… going, alright.” Why not shoot the shit? There was plenty of it. “Pipes in my place are, uh. Under reconstruction? Got real messed up last week, full of something fucked, I don’t know. At least the neighbors aren’t, you know, weirder than usual.” Which had been saying something, alright. But he’d draw a line, sure, at suddenly taking up miming. At other people. In the hallway. Matty shrugged, vaguely. “Same shit, different day, around here. How about you, man? What’s up?”

Kaden raised a brow and gave the guy a one over. “I can see that.” The guy looked rough, alright. Soaked and a little bedraggled. “Bad pipes, huh? What happened? Do you live anywhere near the funeral home by chance?” He almost asked if it was vampires or necrophages since that always seemed to be the cause of leaky pipes in buildings. Occasionally pixies. Usually dead things. But he thought better of it. That joke only landed in a hunter bar, really. He waved down the bartender and ordered a beer, wasn’t sure he trusted the liquor to be drinkable let alone mid shelf. “I’m alright. Less severed heads in my life so that’s been good.” A lot more wings and banshees and death but it was fine. He was fine. Everything was fine. He gulped down a sizable portion of his drink. “I mean, yeah. It’s been a fucking week. Got attacked by the wo-- an animal in the woods the other night. Nearly fucking died. So I’m sure yours is going better than that. Least I hope so.”

Funeral home? Matty frowned, faintly, not sure what that was supposed to mean. “Don’t think so?” Hopefully that was a no. Not somewhere he needed, or wanted, to hang around. With actual corpses. “Just some shithole, you know what it’s like.” Fuck, it was a shame you couldn’t smoke in bars anymore. Still had some of that good weed, from Margot, kicking around. And he was itching for something, anything. Matty gave the bartender a seriously grateful nod as the next Moscow mule landed, shaking off a sudden, cold shiver. A bad one. God, he’d have to get ahold of Felix. Soon.

But. A couple drinks wouldn’t hurt, and the company probably wouldn’t. Jury was out, as of yet.

“Solid.” Less body parts flying around in general, the better, yeah? Elbow up on the scratched-to-shit counter, he took a long, needsome drink, hearing Kaden out. The wo-what? His head tilted, there, doing some wo-wondering. Not too much. His week. Where to start? With the waiting to find out if a couple super scary motherfuckers were going to duke it out to the death over at Hanging Rock, come the weekend? Hanging around a psychotic old-ass leech with fancy tastes? Getting thrown out of a tree by a bloodsucking... monkey, with iron teeth, or some shit? No, thanks. “Oh, totally.” Matty tossed off a tired sorta smile, and raised his glass. “Here’s to - death-defying, huh? Life goes on.” Close enough. “The hell were you doing in the woods, anyway? Nothing but crazy and mosquitoes out there, seriously…”

Kaden nodded at his current companion’s words. “Ah, not related to that then. Nevermind. But yeah, I do know how that goes. Surprised I don’t live in a complete dump here, but I got paid a little more than I’m used to when I took the job at Animal Control.” Out of the sheer desperation they had to fill the position. He felt a chill run through him before taking another sip of his beer. Strange, was the door open or something? He looked back but that was stuoid, it wasn't even that cold out anymore. Odd. Must have imagined it. Or the beer was just really cold.

“To deth-defying.” Kaden raised his glass in a toast and gave a small nod. And a wince as he lifted his arm. Side still hurt, he almost forgot, despite toasting his near death. “I was camping. Didn’t want to stay in my apartment any longer.” He gave a shrug. The details weren’t ones he was ready to dig up so soon. Or share in a bar. At least not this sober. “I’m also in animal control so I’m there a lot anyway. Got attacked by an animal.” Explaining what it was seemed unnecessary. Most people accepted “animal” right off the bat, anyway. “You ever had any near death experiences?

Lauren Langley couldn’t stand to watch this any more, this fraternizing with supernaturals that her son kept indulging in. He'd made his choice to turn away from his duty. He didn’t even do a basic check on this man to see the glaringly obvious. The man at the bar was obviously undead. Kaden should have been able to listen and hear the hollow emptiness where his heart should be beating. And yet he sat there, toasting, making small talk. Disgusting. Disgraceful. She could no longer contain the anger raging inside of her. She pushed out her power, let her anger extend outwards and the lights started to flicker, the sound cutting in and out, as she floated towards the man in question, standing between him and her son, glaring daggers at him that she knew he could see, the blood sucking filth that he was.

Animal Control. Okay, then. Matty’s eyebrows slid upwards, but, hey. Whatever paid the bills. Not like he could talk. “Well, hey. Nice.” Did he want to know about… dogcatching, or whatever this guy got up to? Not exactly, but - he’d always been curious. “Seems like a rough gig. Especially in this town, fuck...” Christ knew what kinda freaky shit Kaden had to deal with, on top of bears, and cougars, and rabid raccoons. Had to feel a little sorry for him, yeah?

Cheers, anyway. To camping, too, sure. Whatever the dude was into. “Cool, yeah. I get that, man. Space. Nice thing to have.” Matty drank. And twitched, as the electricity fritzed. Weird. He blinked, throwing an uncertain glance over the rest of the Rocks, watching as the jukebox glimmered in and out, the static sneering into his too-sharp ears. Near death. With a shook-out laugh, Matty turned back to try and field that one  - only to find some lady. Some ghost lady, all silvery; more substantial than most, though. Nobody he knew. Right? No. He was pretty sure. But that stare. The grin was staggering away from him, on its last legs.  “A… a couple…” Leaning back on his stool, Matty cleared his throat. Took another drink. “Animals, yeah.” He was stumbling, quailing under those eyes. Maybe they weren’t, you know, familiar, but. If looks could murder. Violently. “Maybe we oughta take this outside?” Matty winced, suddenly, sliding to his feet. Ghosts got stuck to places, didn’t they? “Just, seems we’ve got some… fucky wiring, in here. I mean, this joint’s probably a total fire-trap…”

Kaden froze, glass at his lips, as the electricity cut in and out. For half a second he wondered if this was just a result of shoddy wiring. This bar wasn’t exactly high end or upscale. But the shocked looks and startled reactions from everyone around him gave him the feeling this wasn’t a typical occurrence. Putain. He really wanted a night off from the supernatural. Didn’t look like he was going to get it. It seemed like his present drinking buddy was looking through him or around him. Hard to say for sure, but it didn’t seem like his eyes were meeting his. Hmm, maybe his near death experiences were a hell of a lot worse than Kaden’s. Shit, might have hit a nerve. “You alright?” he asked, brow raised as the guy started to freak out. “Yeah, I noticed.” Kaden glanced around the place, didn’t see anything else strange, but there was a bit of a cold spot as he stood to follow. “I’m guessing this isn’t normal for here. Got any better suggestions?” Bullet was out so he supposed it was another night at Dell’s. He shrugged as they headed outside, could be worse.

He wasn’t going to get away so easily. Lauren knew he saw her; he must know her feelings as well. Or at least sensed them. And she hadn’t even spoken yet. “Leaving so soon, vampire?” she asked, smirk on her face. “I wasn’t finished here.” Her voice was laced with venom, but it was still and even all the same, cold and poisonous at the same time. Once again, she pulled into her anger and used it to send the unused glasses from the bar exploding out in every direction, but most of the glasses aimed at the vampire. Unfortunately, her son, too. But he could tolerate the pain. And maybe it would give him a hint to either leave this loathsome creature or, better yet, kill it. She disappeared a moment and then flashed back in front of the vampire, spectral face inches from his. “My son may not put a stake through your heart. He’s gone soft, you see, but I sure will. Better yet, I’ll make sure he does.”  

“Me? I’m good, yeah, just...” Haunted. “Honestly, I…” Matty trailed off, a shudder creeping down the back of his neck, all the way. That kind, he realized, now. He’d met his fair share of ghosts. Or, well, his unfair share, depending on how you looked at it. This one was - well, bad fuckin’ vibes, all over, was what she was. Why the hell was the vampire thing her problem? Matty tried to pin his attention down to Kaden, hurriedly tugging his ratty denim jacket on. They’d just fuck off, and he’d try the Rocks again… in a week. Or two. A month from now. Oh, that would blow.

Not as hard as the fuckin’ rain of glass that shattered over them. Matty had heard them rattling just in time to turn, barely soon enough to drop, shoving Kaden by the shoulder, turning his back into a storm of smashing tumblers and sharp edges. Ears ringing, hands shaking - bleeding, somewhere, he could smell it already - Matty gasped out of it, and pushed away across the sticky, glittering floor as the ghost gathered in front of him, face to face. Son? His eyes ticked to Kaden, quick. Back. Yeah, around the eyes, he could see it. Just his fuckin’ luck. Getting in the middle of some kinda family drama.

Wait. Wait, wait. Gone soft? Too soft for staking. Shit. Slayer family drama? Just his fuckin’ luck.

“Listen, I don’t - I don’t know you, or him, or… what your problem is, I...” What he did know, was salt. Salt for ghosts. How, specifically, not so sure. But the salt would be behind the bar - he’d downed enough tequila here to know. Behind the bar, where he was going, fast.

“Shit!” Kaden shouted as he saw the glasses rumble. He raised his hands to shield his head and found himself shoved down out of the way of the oncoming onslaught of glass. White hot pain from his side flashed through him as he twisted and ducked. After the deafening crashes of glass came the screams as patrons started bolting for any exit they could find. Couldn’t blame them. As Kaden stood up straight, his brow furrowed, another wince of a pain, and yeah that was definitely blood dripping along his hands. Fuck. “You o--” He started to ask his drinking buddy as he tried to evaluate the extent of his wounds. Minimal, thankfully. But his words cut short as the other man started speaking to the air.  

“Who are you talking to?” Kaden asked, brows furrowed, and stomach sinking. He had a feeling he fucking knew who the hell it was he was talking to. Putain. Also that meant this guy could see ghosts. Well that narrowed it down a little. Medium maybe? Zombie? Wait what was he going for behind the bar? Shit, time to pull a knife out, just in case. He grabbed a standard blade first but started rummaging in his pockets. Had to have an iron one on him somewhere.

“Oh, how cute. The bloodsucker found the salt,” Lauren smiled and shook her head, arms crossed in front of her incorporeal body. “Do you really think that will stop me?”  Lauren disappeared and sprung back next to Matty’s left, voice slithering right into his ear. “I need you to tell my son something, you filthy animated corpse. Before you turn to dust.” She vanished again and reappeared on his other side, eyes fixed on Kaden even though he couldn’t see her as she spit more venom into the vampire’s ear. “Tell him he should have been better. And that he’s all but proven he’s no son of mine.” Her visage was gone one more for the moment. With a loud crash, half the tables in the bar burst, sending drinks and food tumbling to the floor and wood shards flying in every direction. If that wasn’t a hint for her disgrace of a son, nothing would be.

Shit. Pawing around behind the counter, Matty was doing his best to think, clearly, with blood on the air. Human blood. He’d eaten earlier, but - pig, or something, whatever Nic had drained into those juiceboxes. Not enough to keep the good stuff from being distracting. “Uh…” He stammered, hearing Kaden. Asking a totally sensible kinda question, in the middle of something not sensible at all. There - pinch-bowls of salt. A couple went spilling onto the counter as Matty flinched, that chilling, creeping not-breath riding up his spine again, that hiss an itch across the back of his neck. Tell him.

Oh, this cow could eat it.

“Fuck off, Jesus!” He rasped, flinging a handful of the stuff. Where she’d been, anyway. God, usually ghosts were chill. Why’d he have to wind up drinking with some hunter who had poltergeist-grade baggage? Snatching up another desperate handful of salt, Matty glanced Kaden’s way. Or, almost. Everything went to shit, before he got a good look at the guy. Again. Worse. The back-mirror splintered and sheeted apart as pieces of table and chair stabbed through, into the wall, quivering furiously. “Your mom!” Shouting over the noise, Matty cowered behind the bar, panting hard and panicky from where he’d hit the dirt. “I swear, man - that’s what she says...” Why she felt the need to let him know, well. That, Matty sure as shit couldn’t answer.

Kaden was still fumbling for anything iron when the tables exploded. He dropped down and ducked, once again using his arms to shield himself. Fucking shit. This had to be an angry spirit, right? Shit, he was so far out of his depths here.

He shot up at the man’s words. “My mom?” His brow creased and he looked around, as if he’d be able to see her. “Putain de merde!” he grumbled, rolling his eyes. He had a feeling that was the case. He really wished it wasn’t. Fucking fuck. “Circle yourself in salt!” he shouted

Wait. Did that mean?

No. That. No. It couldn’t be.

As soon as her son froze, Lauren knew he’d figured it out. She’d hoped that he would, maybe a little sooner, but her faith in him had waned. “Do it, mon petitou. Do it.” She whispered in his ear as if he could hear him. All she needed was for him to stake one measly vampire and then she could move on. Maybe.

Kaden shook off his stupor as he felt a chill creep down his spine. There’d be time to evaluate this later. Right now he needed a plan. And to figure out how to stop this. “Want to tell me why the fuck you can see ghosts?” he shouted to Matty. “And why my mother is pissed as shit at you. And me. But you seem like the cause here, too.”

Lauren could feel the rage building up inside her again. Why was he talking? Why wasn't he acting? She threw back her spectral head and screamed, pushing her anger out to shatter all the glass and windows. It lashed out and added more scrapes and cuts to her son’s body. She didn’t care anymore if her son bled. Maybe then this vampire would show its true nature and Kaden would remember that he was meant to fight monsters, not protect them.

Circle of salt. Right. Ghosts, couldn’t cross. Only, then he would be stuck, here, in deep with Langley, who - who, whatever he might be, had shit going on that Matty wanted fuck all to do with, frankly. No offense to the dude, just. No. Kicking some of the wreckage aside, Matty scrambled to draw that circle out, wincing as his supply ran a bit thin. It’d be enough, right? Maybe. He’d stretch it. Did he want to tell Kaden why he saw ghosts? Like hell, if Mama Langley’s hate-on said anything about how she’d raised her son. “It’s, uh - genetic!” Matty shouted back, a little frayed about it. Seemed to work for Nora. Though, Nora was a pretty shit standard for what totally normal people would believe. Obviously. Fuck.

The hot, spattery smell of blood sharpened up, suddenly, tugging at Matty’s teeth until his jaw ached. “I don’t know, man! Maybe she’s just a raging bitch?!” No, the guy didn’t need to hear what mommy dearest was going on about. He shook his head, woozy - a sluggish lick of dark blood dribbled down the side of his cheek, dead and cold. And tried to fix that fucking circle.

Kaden was getting fucking sick of playing duck and cover with a poltergiest. The wounds probably wouldn’t take too long to heal but it still stung. In more ways than one. “Genetic?” Had to be a medium then. Why the fuck was she so mad about a medium? Then his mind jumped to Blanche. Whatever it was, it had to do with her, right? And certainly Regan. There was no doubt there. Fuck. They had to get out of here, but he knew damn well his mother would follow him if they just cut and ran. He had no iron on him. And funny enough, rock bars weren’t exactly filled with it. He looked around on the floor, between the shattered tables and fallen plates, he saw something. A fucking margarita glass. Rimmed with salt. Plastic. Never been so happy to be at a cheap fucking bar. He grabbed it and started swinging it wildly, wielding it like a weapon. “When you see her disappear, fucking run!” he shouted, whirling around the room and waving the salt rimmed glass around.

The hell was Kaden up to? Peeking out around the counter corner, Matty strained to keep his boots in the circle and his eyes on the action. Which was something to see, for fuckin’ sure: Langley, swinging like a drunk playing pinata. Right across his shrieking-mad mom, the spiderwebby substance of her rending apart. And not coming back. For a beat, Matty couldn’t believe it. But, he didn’t have to. Unfrozen, he lurched alive and out - the shattered front window, the shortest path to away from all this. Stumbling wildly into the parking lot, Matty hit the asphalt at a sprint, with a skitter of glass, and didn’t stop. Not until he was far, far away from the blood, and that mess of a bar, and Kaden Langley’s totally batshit mommy issues.

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Thirty-Six

Table of Content or Part Thirty-Five

Read on wattpad here.

Word count: 3.3k

Warning(s): Explicit language, drug abuse, explicit sexual situations

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"If you weren't such an asshole, he wouldn't have to take up for me!" I bark at Nikki as he tipsily stumbles around, ranting at me about my "fucking friend not minding his own god damn business" nearly a week ago, as the guys and Doc just look on, not knowing what the hell either of us are talking about.

"I'm an asshole?! Like you don't get me riled up and then play victim?!" He throws at me.

"Like it takes very much to get your tweaked-out ass riled up!" I point at him.

"Bitch!" He sneers out.

"Fuck up!" I hiss back.

Duff wasn't even out of line with Nikki. He had kept calm and advised Nikki to cool down and then come back and talk to me instead of getting himself and me upset.

Nikki hadn't let on if he minded Duff's intervening to defend me, until a week later, because he was taking it as Duff trying to tell him how to be married to me as if he knew me better than Nikki did, which wasn't at all Duff's intention.

Compared to the number I've seen Duff do on guys during a fist fight, Nikki was lucky he didn't lay him out in the driveway. However, he would eventually know what it felt like to be punched in the face by Duff during the "Girls" tour.

Duff was good at keeping his cool until the people he cared about became involved, and if he had been drinking a lot--which, towards the early 90s, that was the case--his temper could surpass mine, and he worried less about legalities and just started decking people as hard as he could.

I knew he struggled with the band, they weren't as close, Steven had been replaced by Matt Sorum, Izzy got sober and began distancing himself to stay sober, and to top off the disconnect from each other, Axl had become God in his own mind, which caused the fans, the band, and the people around him to suffer.

Once I realized his drinking and drug use became so overzealous, our agreement which was arranged out of court, that each of us have two weeks with Monroe a piece, became an arrangement that I had sole custody but took Monroe to visit his father for a few days out of the month. Duff was struggling so badly to keep it together with his mental health, addiction, and ailing of his band, that he didn't really notice I had our son more than he did.

If he had been a baby and wouldn't remember his father throwing back Solo cup after Solo cup of vodka, putting cocaine in the end of his cigarette and smoking it, and not acting like himself, I would have just left Monroe in the care of Tansy (since she was fully sober then) and let him stay around for two weeks.

But he was four when Duff started speeding down hill, and he was picking up on when his dad wasn't talking right and when he was acting weird, everything he saw that no one knew he was paying attention to...then he'd come back to me and Nikki after visiting and tell us about everything he had absorbed like a sponge: uncle Izzy traveling separately from the band, Dad being really cold and shivering until he got some water, uncle Axl not singing until a lot of people went home...that's when I decided to cut back time spent with his father and accompany him through his visits.

At first I thought I would be fine staying the two weeks out of the month with Monroe, but Axl and I couldn't quit fighting a majority of the time (because he was a jackass) and I came to the conclusion that Duff had enough on his plate and didn't need me to add to it by trying to punch Axl every chance I got for two weeks straight. So I cut it back to about five days out the month while they were on tour. When they weren't touring and I didn't have to be around Axl, Monroe and I would stay with Duff for about a week and a half.

Being that Nikki was more conscious than Duff, he took up where Duff had left off in the fathering department from '92-'94. This isn't me bashing the dad of my first child, either. Duff is and always will be a phenomenal father, but he stumbled for a few years, leaving Nikki to become the father Duff was supposed to be until Duff got his shit together, like Duff became the man for me that Nikki was suppose to be until Nikki got his shit together.

"Um..." Vince says, causing the both of us to glare at him. "...Can we rehearse now?"

He, Tommy, Mick and Doc were all patiently waiting for Nikki and I to finish our quarrel.

"Yeah." I sigh out. "Have a good rehearsal. I'll be at Tansy's." I head to the door.

"I hope you crash." Nikki gets one last jab in.

"I hope you OD." I leave them with the slamming of the studio door and step to my car.

Of course I didn't actually want him to OD, I just wanted to hurt him. And I did.

By the time it was time for the U.S. tour of Theater of Pain, our hands were being pinned behind our backs, and Doc was giving us a "get along or there's no Vivian Sixx on the tour" promise.

Although we were in the middle of a small battle and wanted nothing more than for the other person to wave their white flag and beg for forgiveness, Nikki didn't want to imagine going months without seeing me, and I was scared if I wasn't on tour to keep an eye on him, he would take his issues too far.

So we made up for the sake of each other's sanity, but again, never discussed what exactly happened to make us fight to begin with, and just harbored resentment we didn't realize we were holding onto until we started taking it out on each other later on.

The tour starts in upstate New York, then to Connecticut, Massachusetts, Rhode Island, and all went great...until Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

Nikki's coming to the side of the stage where me and his tech are standing, and I think he's reaching for some water while Tommy plays his drum solo, but before I can reach down and grab a bottle from the cooler behind me, Nikki's saying words I always dread hearing.

"Help me, dude." He tells his tech, starting to pull his arm out of his navy and white polka-dotted costume.

"What?" I ask Nikki, before my face pales, seeing him pull a needle out of his boot, and a spoon before handing the lump of tar to him. "You cannot be fucking serious?" I spout over the booming of Tommy's playing.

"Nobody out there can fucking see me, Viv, chill out." He tells me as a piece of tar is melted down with a lighter underneath the spoon.

The fact that it's so casual for him to do this in front of me, is startling.

"Nikki, this can't wait?" I try to reason with him as the spoon is discarded to the floor once the gold is sucked up through the needle.

The syringe is handed back to him, and Tommy's solo is nearly over.

I have to squeeze my eyes shut and turn my head as Nikki plunges the needle into his skin, throws up, then stumbles back on stage, nearly missing his cue.

When the drugs started to override his need for a great performance, I knew he was gone.

I get out of the shower, ringing my hair out and running my fingers through it, hearing the phone in the hotel room ring.

When I go to answer it, Nikki and Tommy are grabbing at it, shewing me away.

"Hello?" They both obnoxiously say and I roll my eyes.

The person on the other side of the phone says something.

"Oh, hey, Duff." Nikki smirks, glancing at me and I give him a "you better be fucking nice" look.

"Hey, Buddy." Tommy adds.

"Viv? Yeah, she's here." Nikki tells him and I step to them, reaching my hand out to grab the phone, thinking he's going to give it to me. "Well, she can't really talk right now with my dick down her throat."

My eyes bug out of my head as I tackle Nikki and yank the phone from him while he and Tommy laugh loudly.

"Hello?" I ask.

"Hey, s-sorry to interrupt but I was just gonna call and check how it's been going." Duff replies.

"It's great." I assure him, leaving out the heavy drinking and drug binge Nikki and Tommy have been on.

"How's Nikki been? Is he still pissed at me?"

"No, no, he's been..." I think of what to say. Shooting heroin on stage? Coked out and shooting Jack Daniels with Tommy? "...great." I finally say, seeing Nikki and Tommy biting each others ankles like dogs.

"I'm sorry again if I overstepped, Viv. I didn't mean to, I just got a little pissed." He tells me.

"Duff, he's fine, I promise." I state, seeing Tommy and Nikki start wrestling, completely oblivious to my conversation. "It's fine. I'm use to his tantrums."

"I don't think that's healthy, Viv." He tells me calmly and I let out a breath.

"He's just stressed out, they all are. It'll get better once this tour is done."

"And what happens next tour?" He asks me.

Nikki's affair is outed on television, I try to kill him, your band comes on tour with them, and you get me knocked up...

"I'm hoping he'll be over this hellion phase by then." I admit, Tommy and Nikki each have handfuls of each other's hair, yanking on it, still not paying me any attention.

"Maybe it's not my place, but from outside looking in, I'm worried about you, Viv."

"I know, I know, but there's no need to." I reassure him.

He let's out a breath, knowing he can't win, and gives up for now.

"I feel like the fucking brick wall you argue with." He tells me and I smile, rubbing my lips together, before seeing Nikki and Tommy finish their play fighting, standing up, looking like they're about to leave.

"Hey, I gotta go but I'll call you when we get to the next city, alright?" I tell him.

"Oh, yeah, that sounds good." He replies. "Goodnight, love you."

"Love you, too." I reply before hanging up just as Nikki and Tommy sneak to the door. "Where do you two think you're going?" I ask and they freeze.

"Uh, well..." Tommy stutters to come up with an excuse, but Nikki just doesn't give a shit.

"Score some stuff." He tells me and I cross my arms over my towel.

"Nikki--"

"Tommy, can you give us a second?" Nikki says it like the answer can't be "no."

Tommy just raises his brows a little and nods.

"Sure, man, I'll be in my room when you're ready." He tells him, stepping out.

Nikki shuts the door behind him and I wait for him to start a fight, my brow raised, an expression of "can't wait to hear what audacious bullshit comes out of your mouth this time" is plastered all over my face when he turns around.

As far as I can tell, he hasn't snorted, shot up or smoked anything in the past hour and a half, which means I'm not facing the absolute devil that goes by the name "Sikki" and is Nikki's evil, drug loaded, irritable, mean, scary, abusive, demonic, sadistic, cruel, vindictive, disgusting alter-ego.

Nikki rolls his jaw a little with each step to me, but I don't cower back, waiting for him to say whatever it is he is going to say.

His hands bunch at my towel, pulling me against him.

He doesn't say a word, and I keep my arms crossed until he holds back the inkling of a smirk, leaning down to press a small kiss where my shoulder and neck meet.

I know what he's doing, because I do it to him all the time: using sex to get what he wants.

I bite my tongue to keep from moaning when we realizes I'm not budging and ups the anti, the tip of his tongue making slow, figure-eights in the same spot.

I feel like someone's knocked the back of my knees loose with a baseball bat, and I have to uncross my arms and hold tightly to him to keep from falling down.

He completely engulfs me in his arms at the sound of me letting out a whimper, my fingers grabbing at his hair, my legs rubbing themselves together to aid some relief.

His hands pull at my towel, discarding it to the floor, pressing his lips along my chest, over my breast, running his tongue around my nipple skillfully.

Hands run themselves between my legs while teeth carnally tug and bruise my skin, sending a wave of heat from my chest to my dripping core.

His mouth moves to my other nipple, but my real undoing is when his teeth trail down to the rib below my right breast, and bite down.

I gasp out, arching into him, my head tips back as he adds a bruise to the skin there that's already scarred with his teeth imprints collected over the years.

He smooths his tongue over the bite before trailing down my stomach, pressing to my pubic bone.

He pulls one of my legs over his shoulder as he gets on his knees, pressing gentle kisses down my inner thigh.

My chest is heaving with loss of breath as he looks me in the eyes and runs tongue from my entrance to my clit.

I dig my nails into his hands that hold steady at my waist as the slick sound and euphoric feeling of his tongue lacing back and forth and side to side against the sensitive nerve endings.

He pulls away for a moment, only to spit between my legs and suck it off my pussy, making my one standing leg go numb at the sensation.

Shallow pants leave my mouth as I start moving in rhythm with him, one of my hands reaching for his hair, pulling at it.

He takes one of his hands from me before rubbing it against my folds, getting his fingers wet, and sliding them into me.

The thick, fullness has my walls tightening around the two digits, eager to please myself as his tongue massages my clit, and my fingers come up to play with my own nipples.

"Nikki." I let out shakily, his fingers curling inside of me, pulling back out, pushing back in only to repeat. "Fuck, you do it so good." I praise hoarsely, one of my hands going back to his hair.

His tongue picks up it's pace, sending my heart rate into overdrive as his fingers keep up with the pace.

He knows exactly what he's doing, smirking up at me when his fingers hit the spot, my throat unable to contain the loud but curt moan that the people in the room next to us can probably hear as I milk his fingers as if they're his cock and my orgasm gets closer and closer.

He pulls his mouth away, licking his lips, before using the pad of his thumb from his other hand to rapidly rub at my swollen flesh.

I grip around his fingers so tightly it falters his ability to move them as well, and he lets out a little groan.

"I wish I could be three places at one time." He comments.

If he could be three places in me at one time I would be wrapped around him 24/7.

"C'mon, Viv, I'm getting really thirsty here." He says gruffly, that fucking smirk pulling at a corner of his mouth, as I throw my head back, letting out another loud moan, so close to my end I can taste it.

His hazel eyes looking up at me in adoration as I curl my toes and come so hard I see black dots.

He's taking his fingers out of me, grabbing at my ass with both hands, pulling me into him and licking every last drop of cum from me before I collapse on top of him, the both of us landing on the floor.

He let's out a laugh as I try to catch my breath, my chest pressed against his, my hands holding at his biceps.

"Are you okay?" He asks me, proudly, and I nod.

"I just need a minute..." I can barely get out in a rasp.

After about five minutes, I'm getting off of him and pulling myself onto the foot of the bed.

He stands up, too, stepping to my suitcase, tossing me one of his shirts he gave to me.

"Thank you." I say to him quietly and pull it on and when he pulls his jacket on, I know he's about to go out to get some more smack.

This terrifies me and tears come to my eyes.

"I'll be back in..." He stops talking, furrowing his brows, looking at me. "...Viv?"

I shake my head a little, waving him off.

"I'm fine, babe." I try to tell him.

"Vivian, why're crying." He asks me.

"I-I think I'm about to start my period." I lie, sniffling. "I'm just being over-emotional."

"Are you sure?"

I nod.

"I'll be back in a couple hours, alright?"

I nod again.

"Alright, I'll see you later." He tells me, wiping my tears with his thumb before pressing his lips to mine for a few seconds, and walking out the door.

When I envisioned my life when I was little, getting married at nineteen, having three miscarriages by the time I was twenty-one, having an addict husband, and spending a majority of my nights sleeping alone—which is one thing I absolutely hated to do—was not at all how I dreamt of my life being when I grew up.

But there I was.

Night after night.

City after city.

Alone.

In pain.

Broken.

Silent.

With not a single soul knowing about it.

It's been four hours and Nikki still isn't back.

Restless, I turn over to read the digital alarm clock.

4:02a.m.

Sighing out, I get out of the bed and go to my suitcase to grab a pair of panties and slip them on, before grabbing one of Nikki's shirts from his bag that smells like him.

I leave the hotel room and head next door to Vince's room, knocking on the door.

After several attempts, the door opens to reveal a very confused, half asleep, blonde girl that isn't Sharise—who's baby is due any day now.

"Hi." I say, hushly, pushing past her. "Did you guys do anything in the bed?" I ask her once I'm standing by the bed and she rubs her eyes, still in a haze.

She mumbles something that sounds like "the shower" and I hold out my room key to her.

"You can go sleep in my bed. Room 223." I say.

She doesn't ask questions, she just wants to go back to sleep.

Once she shuts the door, I'm patting around the mattress to avoid laying on Vince.

I slip in where she was, Vince's back to me.

I seperate his naked body from me by laying on top of the sheet, just letting the comforter guard me from the cool air from the vent, and actually snuggle closer to him, my forehead pressing against his back as I hold Nikki's shirt close to me like it's my sacred baby blanket, and drift off.

[guardianofmemes]

fallout 4 companions best to worst

with funny images at the start of each character review! DLC companions included! also BIG TIME SPOILERS FOR FALLOUT 4 OKAY 3 2 1 GOOOO!

1. nick valentine - clockwork PI 

positives: he’s a robot detective who loves neon and smokes even though he has no lungs you know he’s a man who appreciates aesthetic.

negatives: none

2. old longfellow - old salty 

positive: grandpa time. he's perfect. this man is everyone's rough and tumble but supportive grandfather. he's a rough block of wood, well worn and with a sense of humor, drinking habits, great dialogue, fantastic personality and can follow you around, he never outwears his welcome. he can even follow you around the commonwealth. rivals nick valentine for best companion to me.negative: i can't really think of ANY.

3. codsworth - lovable orb 

positives: truly a stalwart companion, never abandons you, waited 2 centuries for the player character. it made me upset you couldn't romance them, the character who truly had a connection with you. they're fantastic and the top 3 was a REALLY close call.

negatives: cannot romance, wHY TODD YOU COWARD

4. preston garvey - minutemen general 

positive:  i can't even bring myself to post a jokey image for him he's just that good. god his character is good. he's a broken man, but he still doesn't stop helping others, or giving up hope. he's truly a good person, but not unrealistic. he has his limits, and can bend and break. and unlike other companions strangely, he DOES have more loyalty breaking points than the others, like if you side with raiders he will shoot you on sight. unless you deviate from the carefully curated quest paths in which case aaaaaaa also his backstory good, and i like how he faces his inner demons, altho i wish he'd just take the mantle of general. he honestly deserves it.

DOWNSIDES: ANOTHER SETTLEMENT NEEdS OUR HELP. making any companion a never ending, radiant quest hub, is a BAD FECKIN IDEA BOYO. BUCKO ITS A BAD IDEA. as a result of him being a radiant quest hub, its the onbly thing people know about him, care about, and experience while in game, because before and after every character interaction is something about his radiant quest hub quests. also romancing him feels HORRIBLE just like mac cready.

5. john maccready - ratface 

positives:  Positives, I like snarky mercs. And he had real Scout vibes.Honestly if you forget he existed in any other fallout games, on his own he's a decent companion. I like having him around, he's like that coworker of yours who keeps stealing office supplies but he always has spare smokes if you ask. honestly maccready is like if you dipped piper in the FEV. he's just a better version of her.  she's too heavy handed i'm sorry

negative:  again bethesda's bad design about being afraid of upsetting consumers. because once you finish his personal quest, spoilers getting the cure for his infant son's sickness, he should IMMEDAITELY RETURN TO HIS SON. WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE MAC AND CHEESE. GO RAISE YOUR SON. also romancing him just feels dirty and manipulative. this MAN IS CLEARLY STILL GREIVING FOR HIS DEAD WIFE!!!  most of the romance paths honestly feel dirty and manipulative to me, like you're taking advantage of their friendship and trust in you

6. Ada - actual wife 

positives: i love robots and this is like if curie didn't suck and wasn't born sexy yesterday. she has a character arc and is cool and has personality and also she's made of different robot parts when she starts out and that's cool. her story is good and even her generic lines are charming.

negatives: after the mechanist dlc is over she has no more unique cool things to say, and its sad they didn't prepare enough dialogue for her

7. john danse - paladin pants 

positives: danse is a trooper, he's a boot boy yeah. in literal apocalypse land tho, understandable. also he is loyal to his team and anyone he considers his friends. once he spoilers is exiled from the brotherhood for being a synth and loses his way he does lose some of his hangups, becomes a more thoughtful person. his character arc is good, i like how he ends up.

negatives: holy fuck my cat just jumped in my lap he's like my way or the highway haha. anyways back to pants paladin. like i said he has some hangups, aka his racism from living in the brotherhood, a proto-fascist military cult. but honestly this doesn't make him a bad character, and he does get better from it. i'm gonna be real here the only negative about him is again, THE ROMANCE PATH. IT FEELS SO NEGATIVE AND DIRTY AND MANIPULATIVE. like i see people say he's a bad character but no he's just a bad person. and even then, he does learn and adapt.you can have characters who aren't good people in your stories

8. piper - waifu bait 

positive:  extra extra read all about it, the tracer of fallout 4 not totally a bad thing tho, she's just.obviously the companion you're supposed to like the most.

negative:  her quirkiness has its charms but it can be KINDA much sometimes. also she’s obvious waifu bait. however in the end she's really more a person i'd want to argue with as a friend and hang just chill around she's pushy tho and i don't like being railroaded into certain quests or storybeats.

9. dog - dog 

positive: dog is dog

negative: is not robot detective or butler, but is still good

10. deacon - MY EYES!!! 

positives: charming spy man, so deep in the weeds he doesn't even know his own past or even if he's a synth. that's quirky and cute. he also has that very obvious spy charm of, his disguise is just him wearing clothes. iits funny like superman putting glasses on.

negatives: honestly he's just kinda bland. he's such a mystery wrapped in an enigma locked in a puzzlebox owned by that demon guy with the needles in his head, that there's nothing to know about him. really i can't figure him out. or get to know him.then again some of that is due to trust issues. i mean neat character trait but there's not much for me to consume here.

11. john hancock - anarcho beef jerky 

positive:  he's a pretty free wheeling kinda dude and i like that, he stands up against bad authority, to an extent, and that's where some of my issues crop up

negative:  it could also be blamed on shitty bethesda afraid you wouldn't do certain content if it locked you out of your favorite companions, but he'll stand with you through allying with the institute, the brotherhood, anyone. also his anarchist leadership style has resulted in a lot of issues for his community he doesn't seem keen on fixing or reflecting on anytime soon. also constant substance abuse and he'll encourage you to take on the party hardy lifestyle tooi just look at freeside i mean goodneighbor i mean freeside and i think "man you're supposed to be the king i mean the mayor you should do better". ripoff of the king i'm gonna rip off the bandaid tbh, not even as cool as the king. the king really looked out for freesiders while hancock kinda just... meanders about the place. being mayor with no authority on purpose just makes you, a guy who kills people sometimes.

12. automatron - build-a-bear workshop BUT WITH GUN 

positive: there's a few distinct personality modules and voice actors for the automatron companions, each one is enjoyable, i liked them, and they were all different from each other. i consider them like mini companions. plus being able to build your very own custom robots with any parts you want is the most epic part of this companion.

negative: the dialogue for the voice actor packs is pretty limited, like pretty limited. not a lot to hear before they loop. i'd have to say these are more neutral than even X6-88 for me

13. X6-88: oh that uniquely named courser that showed up as i destroyed the institute, wait he was a companion??? 

positives:

okay negatives time

negatives:for real tho he's just uh, again kind of a Nothing character. not as disappointing as Strong tho. As an institute courser he's just... well he just Is. he exists. doesn't really question his nature tho, or consider what life would be like outside the institute... its like if Danse had no character arc at all and spoilers just stayed in the brotherhood like a good proto-fascist feudalistic power armored boot boy. he feels like a quota like todd howard walked in the design room and said "we need an institute companion" and then the designers said "... fuck. we're almost done with the game's story okay lets cook something up". i'd have to say he's perfectly average. he's like the bland guy from the wendys commercials about how spicy their chicken is

14. porter gage - why do i keep stepping on this rake 

positives: his armor looks cool, and his voice actor is good. i like that a raider character is portrayed by a sneaky advisor type instead of just a chest beating tough guy on chems. porter is an interesting take, and his motivations and methods are interesting.

negatives: his motivations don't make sense though. he's seen over and over in his life that raiders simply are unsustainable and don't work, always breaking apart. yet he... still wants to be a raider, and advise raider gangs? it doesn't make sense. also if you buddy up with him preston will hate you, and you have to eliminate your OWN settlements in the commonwealth. sorry porter but i'm not willing to make that kind of sacrifice at all. he's alright as a character but not really deep. having a backstory doesn't mean you're deep, that's Bethesda Deep™. Bad, no. Die now with the rest of nuka world, gage.

15. strong - fallout 3 was a mistake 

positives: non-human companion, i like that. super mutants are always cool

negatives: lumpy and misshappen as fuck oh god he's like a slab of moldy ribs. also his character? what character? he's just a bog standard super mutant, not even a cool one from the west coast. he's just an orc, a raider painted green with half a brain and a penchant for eating people. he doesn't change or evolve, he's just. he's a Nothing character.

16. curie - born french yesterday 

positives:  so i guess i should start with the positives since that's a trend in this list now. positives! robot, and one that's both aware of how the world's dead but wants to learn, and make it better. i always like robots, and well. uh. robot. i'm out of positives now.

negatives: she is the living embodiment of th e born sexy yesterday trope. profoundly naive, yet unimaginably wise. and spoilers once she gets a SEXAYYYYY human bod from a braindead synth, her naive nature is played up even further as WHAT EEZ DIS STRANGE FEELING UWU I FEEL HORMONE AND LUUUV its bad, its bad its bad. french maid plus nurse wrapped into one, with the mind of a child, aka its the born sexy yesterday trope. and you can only fuc once she's out of the robot body and this makes betheseda COWARDS. LET ME HAVE MY ROBOTS.

17. cait - drug

positive:

negative: commit go away from my game. rude, not fun to be around, substance abuse storyline is NOT handled well. also in boston the one irish character is all fucked up come on man.

[marissvs]

›  :･ﾟ ⧼ ESTER EXPOSITO. CIS FEMALE. SHE/HER. // MARISSA MONTESINOS is a TWENTY ONE year old POLITICAL SCIENCE student at charleston univeristy. walking past their room last night i heard LOVEFOOL - THE CARDIGANS on full blast, makes sense considering they’re known as the VIXEN. SHE can be best described as +AUDACIOUS & -IRASCIBLE. they remind me of the lingering smell of perfume after she’s long gone, the burning of whiskey going down your throat, drunk texting your ex. [ peaches. 22. brt. she/her. ]

hello my dudes !! your girl is late as usual but she’s here and ready to plot with all of you and love all of you as well bc we ?? stan ?? love !! under the cut there’s info on my child marissa and yeah, enjoy <3

STATS

FULL NAME: marissa angelica montesinos.

NICKNAMES: mari, riss.

MAJOR: political science

DATE OF BIRTH / AGE: december 4th / twenty one.

HOMETOWN: madrid, spain / toronto, canada

GENDER IDENTITY: cis female.

PRONOUNS: she/her.

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: heterosexual.

MBTI:  enfj — the protagonist.

OCCUPATION: full-time student at charleston university ( 3rd year )

PINTEREST BOARD: a very bad one

BACKSTORY

the Montesinos family is a name of power and influence in Spain. Marissa is the daughter of Juan, a politician, and Miranda, a CEO... so it's safe to say that they put a lot of pressure on their only daughter to succeed.

but marissa was nothing but a disappointment ever since she reached high school. parties, booze, drugs and meaningless sex were a part of her daily routine; that also meant that she was in the headlines a lot... because who doesn't want a scandal about the politician's daughter ??

her parents, not wanting any more scandals, shipped her off to Toronto when she turned 17. some people would guess that she would keep up her act, but being isolated from her family made her try to be better... which she did... and ended up in one of Canada's Ivy League.

choosing her major was quite easy. to quote gina linetti, she has great hair and loves lying... she was born for politics.

although trying to keep out of trouble... she has gone to every party since her first year. you didn't invite her ?? oh well, she'll be there. because is not a party if she's not there.

she really thought she could become what her parents dreamed

though my girl spiraled back to her old party self when she broke up with ex #1. she's trying to control herself because she doesn't want to worry anyone, acting all cool and chill, but she's not and you can see that bc she smokes two packs of cigars a day and is always on red bull.

if you watch euphoria, you know that scene that rue says she is a fucking genius when she’s trying to figure out the shit that went down between nate and jules ??? well, that’s marissa at 3 am when she’s trying to figure out who is the murderer after 7 cans of red bull.

PERSONALITY

she doesn't discriminate, she talks to everyone. but she's that type of person that will talk shit behind your back... and call you out on your shit.

she is cool and collected most of the times with a witty sense of humor like any lady should be, but when she is mad ???? a fucking volcano and takes hours for her to cool down. she will absolutely throw hands if anyone tries to fuck with her loved ones. and yet, she’s still a complete girly girl through and through.  i guess she’s passioned ??

afraid of failure ?? hell yes. will she go to a party before exam weeks starts when she didn't even touch a book ?? hell fucking yes.

have you watched how i met your mother ?? you know how barney always accepts a challenge ?? marissa is the same. no matter how difficult or if it’s breaking a law, she’ll do it. especially if she’s drunk/high/whatever.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

roommate: marissa is most likely a pain in the ass for them, her side of the room is messy and she is always postponing to clean it. not to mention you never know if she will show up or not in their dorm at night. but other than that, marissa holds them in a close friends status and is ready to fight a bitch if they cross her roommate.  taken by clementine dunaway

ex #1: opposites attract kind of situation, people always wondered how they even got together in the first place but they seemed to work very well together. marissa thought they would go to the distance, it was the first guy she thought about building a family with and all those childlike dreams. lingering feelings and how/why they broke up to be discussed ?? taken by theo stanton

ex #2: started as a rebound from ex #1 for her, but the relationship blossomed and they were quite happy for a while. she had feelings for them but wasn't as intense and so she decided to break up with them to not lead them on. if they broke up in good or bad terms to be discussed ?? if it's good terms, maybe they became friends or friends with benefits ?? if it's bad terms... well, she thinks she was on the right to break up with them so she just pictures them as a petty ass bitch and is a little shit to them.

girl squad: what is a girl without her trusted girl squad ?? marissa is a ride or die, so if you are on her squad she'll go to the depths of hell for you with no questions asked.

sibling like relationship: self explanatory ?? probably someone to keep her from doing bad, crazy shit all the time. teasing each other endlessly but there’s nothing one wouldn’t do for the other.

 mulder & scully: SOMEONE TO BE HER PARTNER ON CONSPIRACIES THEORIES. she might act like a cool girl, but she has a vast knowledge of conspiracies and will not shut up if you get her started. taken by laurena rojas

study buddies: doesn't need to be from the same major as her, it's just someone that can be authoritative enough to make marissa go to the library and get a book, instead of thinking she's thanos after getting A's or B's without studying.

random hookups: self-explanatory as well ?? she still hits you on that nokia 3210 late night when she needs your love. or someone to drink with.

anything else please.... we can brainstorm ???

[katedoesfics]

StrangerVille | Chapter 2

Jayson didn’t see Siobhan or Morgan the rest of the night. He stepped out of the bar into the cool, dry air, the streets quiet and desolate with the exception of a handful of bar patrons having a smoke. He shoved his hands in his pockets and turned away from the bar, walking the few blocks to his home beside the trailer park.

It wasn’t unusual for the residents of the park to be out late, gathered around a fire drinking and laughing, and they often waved to Jayson when he walked by, now familiar with his presence. On this night, however, the trailer park was quiet, though not empty. In the light of the moon, he could see a figure standing alone, a dark shadow erect in the center of the park, unmoving.

Jayson slowed, studying the figure for a moment. An inexplicable chill ran up his spine and his heart quickened nervously, though he hesitated. His gaze narrowed, trying to figure out who the figure was, and why they were standing so still. After a moment of staring, the figure’s head turned to Jayson, and he took an uneasy step back as their eyes met. The figure’s head cocked to the side, then the rest of the body turned to face him. An arm lifted, but not in warm greeting. It moved to a ninety degree angle to the ground and hung for a moment, swaying lightly.

The figure took a stiff step forward and twitched, then took another step forward, legs never bending.

“What in the fuck…”

A smile split the man’s face as it stepped out of the shadows, still moving stiffly toward Jayson. But Jayson had had quite enough of the odd interaction, and he quickly turned and sprinted the rest of the way to his house. His fingers fumbled to unlock the door, and once inside, he slammed it and locked it tightly behind him.

He leaned against the door, his heart racing, and he waited for his breathing to slow. Then, his cheeks warmed as a realization came to him. Those bastards were fucking with him! Hazing the new guy - of course! His shoulders slumped and he muttered to himself. He would get them back; he would get them back good.

*****

Milk dropped from his spoon, splattering onto the newspaper spread open on the table. Like every morning, Jayson was having a bowl of cereal, perusing the job listings. On this morning, however, his mind was not focused on the wanted ads, but instead deep in thought, scheming a way to get back at the residents of the trailer park next door. It was all in good fun, of course, but whatever he came up with had to be better than the prank they pulled on him.

He was at a disadvantage, though. There were several of them that could come together, pretending to be zombies, chasing him down the street. He was just one man, which meant he would need something really good to top that. Of course, he couldn’t take their zombie idea. But every idea he came up with would have been impossible without the help of some insane magical abilities or an experimental potion gone wrong. Giant spiders to flood the park, twitching vines that wrapped around their legs, quick sand that would swallow them whole.

His imagination was running wild, and with a sigh, he leaned back in his chair to think more realistically. His financial situation was not one that would allow him elaborate pranks, and it seemed there was nothing more he could do than coat their trailers in glitter and cause only a minor annoyance. Still, he was determined to get back at them in some way, so he folded up the news paper, placed his empty bowl in the sink, and stepped out into the warm sun to make the walk towards the corner store in hopes of getting some ideas as he perused the aisles. 

He was just turning the corner to the store when two familiar young women stepped out, the door ringing as it closed behind him, and he came face to face with the grinning teenager Morgan.

“Look! It’s conspiracy theorist Jayson!”

“Let’s not make that a thing,” Jayson muttered. “Solve the mysteries of the world, yet?”

“Dude!” Morgan exclaimed. “I would have if someone,” she paused to sneer at her sister, “didn’t fuck up all my plans!”

“She covered herself in twigs and leaves and tried to pretend to be a bush.”

“It’s called being incognito!”

“It’s called getting your ass thrown in jail!”

“Anyway,” Morgan started, disregarding her sister’s concerns. “So, did you get those digits, lover boy?”

“Lover boy?” But before he could come back with anything more, Morgan was reaching toward him in an attempt to shove her hands in his pockets to find his phone. Jayson jumped back and batted her hands away. “Woah! Personal space, man!”

“Gimme your phone!”

“No!”

“I would like to remind you that I have no control over the weird things she does,” Siobhan said in an exasperated tone. “Please accept my sincerest apologies since my sister does not know how to act normal.”

“You guys are the weird ones! Fucking give him your number already!”

“You realize we live like, three hours away, right?”

“Two!” She continued to chase Jayson in circles. “Phone!”

“Oh for the love of -” Jayson started. He stretched an arm out, promptly stopping Morgan in her tracks, his palm against her head. She whined and flailed her arms, but he was just out of her reach. He grinned down at her. “Nice try, kid. I don’t need a matchmaker.”

Morgan huffed in exasperation and dropped her arms. “Well, that’s just rude and insulting. My sister is a catch! How dare you think you’re too good for her!”

“Oh, contraire,” Jayson started. “In fact, she is far too good for the likes of me.”

“Aw,” Morgan said, immediately melting. “That’s so fucking sweet it’s disgusting.”

“Don’t you have a lab to break into?”

Morgan straightened excitedly. “Oh, right! I’m meeting a guy who said he’s got some keycard I can use to get in!”

“That doesn’t sound sketchy at all,” Jayson said.

“Totally sketchy,” Morgan confirmed. “We’ll need a strong, brave guy to protect us.”

Jayson put his hands on his hips and looked around. “Too bad there isn’t someone like that around.”

“Come on, loser,” Morgan said, grabbing his wrist and pulling him down the street.

“I did not sign up for this crazy train,” Jayson said over his shoulder to Siobhan.

“Like I said,” Siobhan said, following behind. “I have no control over her.”

“You’d be far better off finding someone else to protect you,” Jayson warned.

“Eh,” Morgan said with a shrug. “I got a good feeling about you.”

“A terrible decision, really.” He allowed Morgan to pull him down the street, and she babbled on about the guy she met when she was snooping around the lab. They walked for several blocks, turning this way and that until they reached the outer edges of the small town and walked along the dusty, deserted highway; the only road leading out of the nobody town. 

In the distance, a figure stood beside the highway, a hood pulled over his head and his hands in the pockets of his hoodie, and Jayson stiffened uneasily. This was it; this was where he would die. His body would be disposed of in the middle of the desert, and no one would ever know what happened to him.

And all because he let a dumb teenage girl and her beautiful sister drag him out into the desert. A trap - it was a damned trap.

But Sibohan bumped into him, suddenly close at his side, keeping just behind him and practically stepping on his heels.

“I knew it,” she muttered, gripping his upper arm. “I knew my sister would be the death of me, I fucking knew it.”

Jayson stopped walking all together, but Morgan only skipped forward to meet the mysterious man. Jayson reached forward and shouted at her, but she turned to him with her hands on her hips and rolled her eyes.

“Stop being such a baby,” she groaned. “It’s just Erwin!”

The hooded man stepped forward to meet Morgan, and he sneered at her.

“Wait a minute,” he said. “You brought a bodyguard?”

“Can’t be too careful, Erwin, right?”

Erwin pulled his hood back, revealing small eyes pulled at the corners angrily behind thick glasses. Freckles dotted his pale skin, and it seemed to Jayson the hoodie was more to protect him from the harmful rays of the sun than anything else. Jayson relaxed slightly, recognizing the young man to be one of the conspiracy theorists in town, and as soon as he relaxed, Siobhan did, too, her grip loosening until she let go of his arm completely.

“Look,” Erwin started. “I’m the first one to admit you should have some reasonable defense. This world is a fucked up place. Hell, I want a bodyguard.” He paused and turned to Jayson. “Are you services available to anyone?”

“Just cute girls and their annoying sisters.”

Erwin considered this for a moment, then turned back to Morgan. “Anyway. This information is top secret. Strictly classified. I can’t have it being passed around to just anyone.”

“Come on, Ers, Buddy. They’re with me! Who are they gonna tell?”

Erwin eyed Jayson carefully. “He’s a military guy.”

Jayson snorted. “Erwin, is it? They picked me up in a bar.”

“That’s where they all hang out!”

“No, no,” Morgan started. “He’s just a depressive alcoholic.”

“Well, wait, I’m not an alcoholic.”

“Just drowning his problems.”

“You and me both,” Erwin said. “I’d hang out there, too, but some of those guys don’t really like me much.”

“Right,” Morgan said. “Like you’re cool enough to hang at a bar.”

“I could be! You don’t know me!”

“I want that keycard!”

“Well, I don’t have it, so go away.”

“You lied?”

“No,” Erwin said, leaning over her. “I said I had it. You assumed -”

“You said you had it!”

“Had! Past tense!”

“Where’s the keycard, Erwin?! Don’t make me sick my bodyguard on you!”

Erwin glanced at Jayson and took a hesitant step back. He put his hands out before him defensively. “Alright, alright. Listen. I don’t have it. Because it was stolen.”

“By who?”

His arms dropped and he rolled his eyes. “Don’t you think if I knew that I’d get it back?”

Morgan grinned. “Yeah? How would you do that?”

Erwin hesitated. “Uh, you know, track ‘em down and… ask for it back?”

Morgan scoffed and turned away from him. “You’re wasting my time, Ers!”

“Alright,” Erwin barked. “I nabbed it from one of those scientists a couple weeks back,” he explained. “He was passed out at the bar, still in his fancy white lab coat, and I fished around in his pockets and found it. But those military guys saw me and tackled me and threw me out. So I ran home, but they must have been following me, and they must have broken in when I was sleeping, because in the morning, it wasn’t on the counter where I left it.”

Morgan groaned loudly and threw her arms in the air, exasperated with him.

Erwin waved his hands at her quickly. “No, no, no, wait,” he said. “Look. I’ve been sneaking around town, listening in to their conversations. I can help you get one of those keycards back. I know some of those military guys have ‘em, and those scientists, too. I know a few names, and I know where they are. If they’re not hanging out at the bar, they can also be found hanging around that old library.” He fished in his pocket and pulled out a folded piece of paper, handing it to Morgan. “This is all the information I have, alright? All the keycards will give you access into the lab. I think the ones with the black dots are better, though. Probably can get you into other places that the regular cards can’t. So get one with a black dot.”

“Are we done here?” Siobhan muttered.

Morgan waved the piece of paper at Erwin. “I guess you’re good for something,” she said. “I’ll let you know what I find.”

Erwin nodded and pulled his hood back over his head. “May The Watcher guide you,” he said in an even tone.

Morgan rolled her eyes and turned away from him, walking back down the highway and into town.

Jayson glanced one last time at Erwin, then quickly caught up to Siobhan, following behind Morgan as she babbled on excitedly.

“You’re not stealing a keycard from anyone,” Siobhan hissed to her sister. “And we’re only here for another day, so stop fucking around with your conspiracy theories, alright?”

“They’re not conspiracy theories,” Morgan snapped at her sister. “You make fun of people like Erwin, but they’ve seen what’s really been going on here. They’re not making this stuff up.”

“There’s nothing going on here,” Siobhan said. “Everything is completely normal.”

“Erwin said that some of the people have been acting funny,” Morgan explained. “Like, they’ve been all spacey and twitchy and when you try to talk to them, it’s like they’re speaking another language or something.”

“Spacey and twitchy?” Jayson echoed curiously.

Morgan shrugged. “And he said there have been a lot of weird, black vans and these serious looking agents with sunglasses. He swears he saw them take one of the people acting weirdly and he doesn’t know what happened to them.”

Siobhan rolled her eyes. “If there was something going on, don’t you think the cops would be involved?”

“They all know about it,” Morgan said, growing excited. “And they’re all keeping it quiet!”

When Morgan stopped walking, they were in front of the old library.

“I’m gonna see what if I can dig up any information,” Morgan said. “And maybe steal a keycard.” But before her sister could argue, she was running up the old steps and disappeared inside. 

Siobhan turned helplessly to Jayson, then offered him a smile. “Well, thanks for going with us,” she said. “I thought for sure we were going to be murdered.”

Jayson forced a laugh, though he was still turning over what Morgan said.

“So, I was thinking,” Jayson started. “You really got your hands full with that sister of yours. You might still need a bodyguard or something.”

Siobhan grinned and nodded. “Yeah, probably.”

“Well, if you do, you could always just give me a call or something.”

“Do you have a business card? Or a company number I can call?”

“You know, I can just give you my direct cell number. That way you don’t have to deal with reception or something.”

Siobhan laughed. “That’s really sweet. Morgan would appreciate that.” She took her phone out of her pocket and they exchanged phones, each entering their number in the other’s.

“I put it under bodyguard,” Jayson said as he handed her phone back.

“I put mine under damsel in distress.” She winked at him and waved a hand as she turned to head into the library. “See ya later, Conspiracy Theorist Jayson.”

[sheepsandcattle]

Chapter 19

His hands are shaking from withdrawal or anger or both as he stirs the off-coloured liquid with the end of a syringe. His phone is pinging beside him, but he ignores it because he knows it’s Jeff asking where he is, and he can’t be arsed with it right now. He’s late. He knows.

Jules reckons he’s in over his head. He’s not making money like he used to, and he knows it’s because he got caught up in it all. He spends more time in the apartment than he does out on making deals these days. He’s barely making rent and Jules is charging him full for the drugs now and he was meant to be with Jeff and Dean an hour ago, sipping beer before they leave the apartment but instead, he’s doing junk on his bedroom floor because—

Hear him out. Everything’s just so fucking much recently. He’s always feeling so blinded and he just wants a bit of darkness.

Does that make sense?

The phone goes off yet again and he gives in, balancing the syringe on his knee as he sends a hurried text; ‘meet u there.’ He was meant to tell them ages ago. Most have forgotten.

After hurriedly drawing the liquid into the needle, he pulls the lace tight around his bicep to take the hit. When he’s done, he chucks the syringe into a mug and leans back onto the end of his bed. He’ll clean it later.

X-Ray Spex are playing so loud that the bass drowns out his pulse. The weight of it drags him into the ground, pins his hands down and his eyelids shut as he breathes through it; heavily through his mouth. He stays put for a while, listening to the music and letting the room evaporate around him until he’s floating in black tar.

He remembers listening to this album on a field with his best mate at seventeen, weed-high with his eyes shut and wishing he could disassociate; to stop feeling and smelling and seeing and hearing anything else around him. Just the music that made his brain jump about in his daft head.

Now he is buried in warm sand and all he can feel is the beat vibrating the ground and all he can smell is nothing and all he can see is black.

For a second, when the song ends and before the next one begins, he feels and smells and sees and hears absolutely nothing. Then Poly Styrene is chanting “I'm a cliché, I'm a cliché, I'm a cliché, I'm a cliché,” and all of his senses come back all at once.

He groans, counts to ten, and forces himself up from the ground. His legs fail him for half a second, but his elbow becomes acquainted with his dresser in time to stop the fall. He grabs a pack of fags whilst he’s there, counts himself in again, and slumps out of his room and through the apartment.

They’re going to a party tonight. It’s half ten at night and Jules has gone out for a fag, which he’d usually do inside but he’s pissed off as well.

He finds him sat on the curb outside, smoking steadily, eyes cast down to his phone. He looks up when the door shuts behind Curly, asks, “you ready,” and Curly nods.

They sit in silence in the car and split off when they get to the party. Curls finds Jeff and Dean almost immediately and sits with them in the living room, lighting a joint and sinking into the sofa as the conversation fills the rest of the air around him.

After an hour or so, Jeff asks, “Curls, are you good,” and Dean says, “man you don’t look right,” but he doesn’t feel like defending himself and he’s soon shuffling pitifully across the front yard to where Jules now sits on the curb with Oscar who’s fresh out of work.

Curls says, “I’m sorry, mate,” and falls beside Jules, arse hitting the pavement so hard his breath thumps and all the air within a twelve-mile radius fills his skull. He takes a long, deep breath to compose himself. “Sorry I’m a cunt, I aren’t like you. I’ve got nothing happening for me these days. It’s rubbish.”

He supposes he did blow up for no reason; didn’t want to come out tonight but didn’t want to be alone again. That’s all. He just wanted Jules to stay, because ever since he came clean about Jordan, he’s felt just a bit closer to his roommate, even if he never tended to say the right thing and, if anything, has become more distant than ever. He just wants someone to cling to for a while.

“That’s not my fault,” Jules scoffs, but he passes his lighter to Curly like a peace-offering. “You got fired. You ditched your guy. You cut your best friend off. You called your mom a… What was it?”

“A daft cow,” he mumbles, and they both laugh a little, but then pretend it never happened because they’re both still meant to be just a little bit angry.

“Right. You did that, not me.”

“I know,” he mumbles, and he feels so fucking minuscule. It’s not really that funny, is it? “It’s just… Shit. Feel like I’m going mental.”

“Yeah, ‘cause you need to get out more. Not just for deals,” Oscar chimes in now and great, he’s had enough of Curly, too. He wonders if Jules has filled their roommate in on Curly’s shit show. Jules nods along with Oscar.

“Yeah. I know, I know.” He doesn’t really know what else to say. “Can I nick a fag?”

Their place on the curb rings with a chilling silence, but the 'oh Curly’ type of laughter that follows washes the tension away and the air is breathable again.

The night feels easy after that and it turns out he isn’t fussed about being out of the apartment after all. The house is a bit rammed and Jeff is winding him up, giving him a look every time he opens another beer, but other than that, he feels comfortable. It’s the first time in weeks that he doesn’t feel like he’s buried in static and white noise.

“Hey Curls, you good?”

It’s a little later when Oscar nudges his shoulder and he’s drunk too, so Curly’s not embarrassed to slur his words.

“Yeh. Have y’got a lighter?”

“Ask me in thirty minutes,” Oscar says. “Oh, and Curls, go clean yourself up, man.”

Curly doesn’t understand why he has to wait or what he’s meant to be cleaning up, but he gets distracted soon after anyway, so it doesn’t really matter.

Dean kisses his cheek at some point. His beard itches and whilst he’s there he whispers, “you wanna crash with us tonight, buddy,” and Curly shakes his head but says, “cheers though.”

Dean’s wiping kitchen roll over Curly’s forearm and there’s a little blood on it but God knows why. Well, Curly knows why. Because he keeps forgetting to ‘rotate scenes’ or whatever it is Jules keeps badgering him about.

“Maybe you should head home,” Dean suggests. Curly walks off.

He dances alone in the kitchen for a bit, then in the living room and then talks to a bloke called Rooney about modern punks and how Curly reckons “it has a whole new meaning these days, and Morrissey is a complete arsehole. Always has been, mate,” but then realises Rooney is a knob who won’t pipe down about immigrants and all the rights he reckons they don’t deserve.

He tells Rooney to sod off and dances some more in the back yard instead with someone (or no one - who knows?)

Someone says, “your accent is bullshit,” and someone asks, “what are you on, dude? Got any spare?” Somebody else tells him, “yeah, no, I get it. Like I tried to go vegan once but…” something, something, something…

A boy with nice eyelashes tells him his hair is amazing and asks to touch it and, oh, at one point he speaks to a bloke named Henry. That’s his dad’s name and Henry says, “yeah, you already said.”

“Your hair’s growing like crazy,” Jordan tells him and... Oh.

Curly doesn’t remember starting a conversation with him, doesn’t even remember seeing him here. Doesn’t remember coming back inside from the back yard or how he ended up in an empty bath, fully clothed with him, shoes scuffing the sides of the tub.

“So why did you wanna talk to me in the bathtub?”

Oh. Alright. Wow, okay. Why did he want to do that?

He rubs his face. He thinks... He thinks. Think think think. Okay. The party was too full. Jeff said, “Curls, slow down,” and Dean said, “J, don’t bother. He’s had too much already.” Jules and Oscar went home (he thinks) and everyone said he should go with them, but he’s been having too much fun and doesn’t like being told when to stop.

“Everyone ’ad too much t’say.”

“Right… But what did you want to say?”

Fuck’s sake. What did he want to say? His head throbs when his temple hits the wall and, oh, was he tilting? Jordan’s hand slips between his head and the tiles, the other landing on the other side of his skull and bracing him.

“Curls, are you alright? Curly, hey.” Curly’s head is tilted back, J’s thumbs digging into his cheeks. “Open your eyes.”

“Yeh.” He does as he’s told, and it turns out his head isn’t tilted back after all, it’s just at the right angle to watch Jordan as he frowns. Didn’t even realise he’d closed his eyes in the first place. Why is he in a bath with— Oh, yeah. “I just… wanted t’say…. Fuckin’ell.”

“I’ll get Jeff-“

“No— jus’…” Curly’s hands are on Jordan’s face now, until the weight of them wins and they drop to his shoulders instead, grabbing the material of his shirt so they don’t fall away. “Are y’a’right?”

Jordan’s eyes narrow, his brows crease and his face tilts slightly. Then he laughs and Curly thinks God bless.

“You. You just wanna know if I’m alright?” His words are tinted with laughter and everything is warm and cool at the same time. “Yeah, Curls. I’m alright. Are you alright?”

He hums, blinking slowly, and when he opens his eyes, he’s on Jeff and Dean’s couch.

The apartment is dead quiet but there’s light coming through the blinds that someone forgot to close. He has a thick, knitted blanket draped over his top half, but he’s still got all his clobber on and his feet hang over the arm of the sofa, Dr. Martens weighing his ankles down. His arm is aching like mad when he feels around for his phone and when he looks down, he’s got a peeling plaster patched onto the crease of his elbow.

His phone has two missed calls and a new message. They’re all Jordan.

10:34 - text when your up

He’s ready to crawl up his own arse with embarrassment. He hesitates but texts back saying exactly that and, within two minutes, Jordan is ringing him.

He answers and forgets to say hello at first, but when he remembers, it’s sandy and his voice takes a second to wear in and the ‘h’ is missing.

“Morning. How’re you feeling?” Jordan’s voice feels worn and sleepy too and Curly can picture him now, in bed with his hair scruffy and his glasses on because contacts are too much effort for the first five minutes of his morning.

“Shite. Head’s killing me,” he grumbles, groaning as he rolls onto his back. “Fuck’s sake. Sorry for last night.”

Jordan laughs over the line and Curly hears him take a breath and reckons he’s getting out of bed or off the sofa. He wills himself to do the same, but only sinks further into the cushions as he listens to Jordan speak. “No need. You didn’t do anything.”

“Was I sick?” Silence. “Oh, for fuck’s sake, I was. Was it bad? Did I row with—“

“No, no,” he cuts him off and he’s giggling. Giggling. As if. “No puke, no rowing…”

Curly can’t quite decide if he wants more information or he’d prefer to stay blissfully unaware, so he stays quiet and waits for Jordan to decide for him.

“Your nose still bleeding?”

“What?”

“Never mind. Listen, about what you said last night: I get it. A’ight?” Curly racks his brain, trying to figure out what he could be on about, and Jordan must make sense of his silence. “If you don’t remember, it don’t matter, I just. I wanted you to know I’m sorry for—“

“Curly,” a voice chimes from behind him, and he finally pushes himself up from the sofa, met with Dean stretching his arms over his head as he makes his way from his room and towards the kitchen. “How are you feeling?”

“Is that…“ Jordan pauses. “Call me back later, yeah? We’ll talk about it.”

“No, it’s alright, now’s fine,” Curly insists, but the line’s already dead. Dean’s looking guilty, only now realising he’d been on the phone, but Curly says, “morning, mate. I feel like utter shit,” as he drops the phone into his lap.

“I bet you do,” Dean chuckles as he hobbles sleepily into the kitchen. Curly hears crockery clang as he calls, “hey, at least your nose stopped bleeding.”

[lactosecarrotsoup]

My thoughts on Sean & Finn’s kiss

This will be long and of course contain spoilers, as if you can’t tell by the title... thingy. So, be warned. This will also contain my opinion(s); which is a very sensitive subject in this fandom. 

We’re all entitled to our own thoughts, opinions, beliefs, etc.

With that said, let’s get started!

For those who are new to this game... I will give you a short summery. Life is Strange is a video game series ran by DontNod. A great company who loves to make players cry. This season has new characters from the other season and DLC. This season takes place in Washington where you play as a 16 year old boy, Sean Diaz, who’s a regular teenager. He loves drawing, skating, and of course stereotypical teen stuff such as drugs and parties. Taking away the partying and drug usage, he’s your typical shy-ish guy. He also has a little brother named Daniel, he’s 9 years old.

Both of them are Hispanic, including their father (Esteban), making this season’s cast more diverse than the first season, where the main characters were mainly white.

Speaking of their father, he dies. Yep. After Sean forces Daniel out of his room, Daniel runs to their hot-headed neighbor and accidentally spills homemade zombie blood on him. Sean over see’s the neighbor about to hurt Daniel and rushes out the house, protecting him. After a few racial slurs/crude remarks to Daniel, Sean decides to fight him. Sean shoves the neighbor onto a small rock (which I still dont understand how that injured him), and he lays on the ground in shock/going unconscious.

A cop shows up and hell breaks loose. The cop only see’s the “blood” on the neighbors shirt and Daniels, thinking nothing but the worst of the situation rather than questioning them. The dad comes out, trying to reason with the officer and he gets trigger happy, shooting Sean & Daniel’s dad, killing him. Daniel screams in shock/anger/horror and Sean blacks out. Whenever he wakes up, the entire street is destroyed and more people are dead/unconscious. He grabs Daniel and they runaway, not wanting to get involved with the crime. It’s later found out that Daniel has powers (similar theme to LIS season 1) and can move objects with his mind.

More shit happens, yada yada yada.

NOW.

Episode 3 just released. In episode two, the brothers meet quite a few people. But most notably for this post, Cassidy and Finn. These two are regular friends (or maybe even “fuck buddies” as Finn and another girl described their relationship), who are a lot like Sean and Daniel. Cassidy left her old home life to live on the road. Finn, I can’t remember if he said anything or not. But I would think it would be for the same reason or something crime related.

Anyways, point is, they all group together and live in the woods. But, they all also work for this dude who runs a farm with nothing but pot.

Yep.

A nine year old and sixteen year old kid are working at a pot farm.

This leads to Finn, Cassidy, and Sean to get high, drunk, etc.

Finn get’s a hair up his ass and decides; “Hey, why don’t we steal all the cash from our boss? Who cares if he may know about Sean & Daniel’s backstory, has security footage evidence of them, and shotguns?!”

Cassidy is against this. But you, the player, have the option to accept or refuse his plan to rob the big dude with the cash.

And in the words of Chloe Price from season one; he’s got some “hella cash”

SORRY I HAD TOO.

But still, you can either rob from the guy or go against it. But HO HO HO! This choice doesn’t matter that much. Finn does it anyways (with a fUCKING NINE YEAR OLD HELPING HIM AND RISKING THAT KID’S LIFE) and Cassidy gets upset and worried. So, if you disagree with Cassidy, you end up meeting with them anyways so you can stop them. You get in trouble either way, btw.

But, let’s back it up.

If you agree to join Finn’s plan, he’s happy and you have the chance to romance him. Which, at first thought (including mine), was great! In the first season, Max was bisexual. You can flirt/romance with Chloe and/or Warren. With Sean romancing Cassidy and Finn, the developers made him bisexual.

But... it’s not all roses. Let me give you my first reaction. I do actually have it recorded.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IGJ8lg5clHM

2:29:55 - 2:34:24

If you don’t watch it, basically I was excited and shocked. I didn’t like Finn at first but in that moment, I shipped them. I wanted Sean to be happy and happy enough to open up about his sexuality, if he hadn’t already.

But, I realized something.

Finn is most likely 20+. Sean is still 16. This means Finn is an older guy kissing a minor, which is of course, illegal. Not to mention that earlier in that episode, he was teaching Daniel to throw knifes and such. He smokes and drinks and admits his sexual relationships in front of a kid, too.

Speaking of his sexual relationships, it would be highly toxic if Sean and him dated/had casual sexual intercourse. Just based on Sean’s personality and how he had a crush on that Jen girl in the first episode, and how close him and Cassidy warmed up to each-other, he wears his heart on his sleeve. One thing this season has done WONDERFULLY is not distribute toxic masculinity. Sean and Daniel have both cried several times. Most men don’t like to talk/show their feelings because they feel weak and such, which is horrible. No guy should feel that way and should openly express them-self.

Sean does this, which is amazing. Yet, still can harm him.

Right after you agree to Finn’s plan, you can kiss him. Throughout the episode, he also flirts with Sean. Of course you have the CHOICE to kiss him... but it’s only after you accept his agreement. You can kiss Cassidy (and sleep with her) but she will storm off, angry, without kissing you, if you agree to Finn’s plan. Which is reasonable. Or, you can lie to her, saying you thought his plan was dumb, and she’ll kiss you. Both reasonable (in my opinion) responses to each situations.

But, how come you can’t kiss Finn regardless? Sean can say no and they could still talk about their feelings, leading to a kiss. Instead, they do nothing.

Finn is manipulative. He used Sean’s emotions to get to him. He probably noticed how close him and Cassidy were and how much love he has for Daniel, openly saying it every now and then, and wanting to protect him. Finn noticed how open Sean is and took advantage. 

Imagine if this wasn’t a choice base game and the story automatically follows Sean agreeing with Finn.

He flirts with him throughout the episode and is very charismatic. Since Daniel notices how close Sean and Cassidy are getting, he rants to Finn. Finn takes in this information and uses it against them. He becomes “cool” in Daniel’s eyes by being super chill, rebellious, and showing him how to violently protect himself/hurt others. In a sense, he becomes Daniel’s temporary older and “cooler” brother, making Daniel look up to him. With Finn’s flirting, he admits (once again, if your choices didn’t matter) that he has feelings for some guys.

Finn takes note of this.

The idea pops into his head to steal from the man who runs the pot farm... thing. I’m an innocent bean who hasn’t done anything harder than prescribed drugs for anxiety and stuff. So forgive me if I’m getting these terms wrong, LOL! But, the point still remains, he tells Daniel who is automatically on board. I doubt a 9 year old boy truly cares if they have enough money or not. I bet his main thought was “If I do this, then Finn will think I’m cool! He’ll treat me like an adult and so will others.”

In fact, I bet you that was his exact thoughts, just based on what he said to Sean and how he acted towards others.

If you really look at it, guys... it looks similar to a Mark Jefferson/Nathan Prescott relationship in season 1. I’m not going to go into many details for the people who haven’t played/watched season 1 yet, but I’ll give you guys a basic rundown by what I mean.

Nathan was mentally ill. He suffered from possibly multiple disorders and had an abusive father. His father wanted him to be the best of the best, not for his sake, but for the families sake. This got to Nathan and he hated his father. Mark Jefferson was a teacher who noticed this, befriending Nathan, and becoming a fatherly figure. The two teamed up to do sickening plans and crimes together which ended up getting them caught in the end.

Now, who does that sound like?

Daniel just lost his father and he’s angry. He probably has PTSD and anger management issues, based on how he’s acting and the situations he’s been through. Finn is an older figure and tricks Daniel to follow his plans and crime, as they’re stealing. They end up getting caught by the boss no matter what they, Sean, Cassidy, or the player does.

Sean is in the same boat, minus the anger issues. He probably suffers more from depression and PTSD (since he talks about the past a lot to others and how they know their story). Since he does talk about his feelings, Finn uses to his advantage.

When Sean agrees to the heist, Finn and him (can) kiss as an award. An award for falling into his trap and doing whatever he wanted.

Nathan got fatherly love and praise from Jefferson, resulting in him to continue their disgusting plans in order to feel loved.

Sean (and Daniel) and becoming the Nathan of this season.

We have to watch out who will be our jefferson.

I also have to address another elephant in the room.

We’re the reason this happened.

If you go through old DontNod/Life is Strange official posts (I suggest instagram or facebook, where i saw mine), I saw nothing but comments saying how much they want Chloe and Max back. I assume this is because of how you can romance Chloe. They want their love story/friendship to continue. Even though we did get a comic series based on them, it wasn’t good enough.

DontNod probably got sick of it and forced this to happen. While they were probably writing Cassidy as a love interest in the beginning, and Finn as probably just a random stranger or a brother of hers, the noticed all the hate and said “fuck it!”

As a result, we got the chance to kiss Finn... before you could write him off by injuring or killing him. Which, many people were pissed about.

But if you REALLY think about it, we were the cause of that. They probably didn’t want that, wanting to focus on Cassidy and the actual story. But many people wanted LGBTQ+ moments (which is understandable) but didn’t want Sean and Daniel’s story. Or they did get involved in their story but wanted a LGBTQ+ character.

The story of Life is Strange (both seasons + DLC) is nothing more but teens/young adults finding themselves through very difficult times. This with the responsibility of super powers, which are hurting those around them. It’s not meant to be a romance. It’s meant to be a drama, sci-fi, and angst story. (And thriller bc of Max’s nightmare bc that shit scared me)

While yes, I was happy and excited at first about Sean & Finn kissing. I was happy that there was potential for things to be “normal” and Sean to be happy, there was a lot of red flags. The age differences, the manipulation, the parallel's, and how forced it was.

Thanks for coming to my TEDTalk! Before you leave a hateful response, please know my opinion is valid like yours and others. Not only that, but I’m not the first to point some of this out. :)