#but it would get REALLY LONG if i listed them all out

[spirit-lanterns]

HAVE A SEAT!

synopsis: co.ckwarming various hsr women

featuring: ruan mei, feixiao, lingsha, herta

rating: 18+ smut (men and minors dni)

warnings: sub! afab fem reader, dom character, strap on usage, strapwarming, co.ckwarming, feixiao and lingsha have d.icks, lingsha has two di.cks, lap s.ex, semi-public se.x, pene.tration, unprotected se.x, riding, oral, slight degradation (herta), slight exhbition (lingsha and herta), established relationship, might be ooc.

art credits: superstar rivalry

RUAN MEI

“Subject Delta’s brain waves are normal. Their behaviors are normal. A change in diet may be necessary however, as th— darling will you stop squirming?” 

Ruan Mei sighed and stopped her recording, looking down at you writhing in her lap as you tried to get comfortable. It was a long day in the lab for Ruan Mei, nothing out of the ordinary as she just had to get through the list of reports for the week. Unfortunately, (or fortunately) for you, whenever the biologist was starting to get bored in her office, she would always call for you to soothe her boredom.

And in this case, it seems that Ruan Mei had wanted you to get out the strap she loved using and sit on it while she did her reports. You never pegged your girlfriend as the type to be into something so risqué —especially in her lab of all places— yet she was adamant on you cockwarming her while she worked. 

“R-Ruan Mei I can’t…” your voice cracked as she nestled her strap deeper inside you, the girth of her cock stretching you open as slick pooled at the base of the toy. Ruan Mei had definitely noticed the sticky mess, but rather than being a clean freak and wiping it away, she gathered a bit of the essence on her finger instead. “Please move…I need it…” 

“I am not finished with my recordings. We still have to go over six more stages.” She comments curtly, admiring the consistency of your slickness by seeing how far she could stretch it between her fingers. The eyes behind her reading glasses were fogged in what appeared to be pure lust. She really was lost in the sight of you gripping her strap so needily, tightening around her while your nails dug deeper into her thighs. “…What did I say about your nails?”

“Mmngh…sorry…” you could barely contain the urge to bounce on her. Ruan Mei was just too mean… 

“Apology accepted. I should cut them for you later…” Ruan Mei made a mental note for herself and took one of your hands into hers, gently pressing against your nails —which had grown a bit long— and aimlessly began thrusting. 

At the sharp bounce of Ruan Mei’s strap bulldozing its way in, you resisted the urge to cry out in utter bliss. Ruan Mei ignored your obvious struggle and just stuffed her fingers into your mouth, slathering your precum over your tongue and making you gag.

“I need to start again. Please do be quiet this time.” 

She turns the recorder back on, the red light flashing mockingly in your face while Ruan Mei shoves her fake member deeper into your hole, back to being cold and calculating while your walls spasmed over her toy.

“This is take two.”

FEIXIAO

“Don’t grip me so hard…” 

Feixiao groaned and squeezed your waist as you nestled comfortably in her lap. The General thought it would be a fun idea to have you cockwarm her while she worked out, saying that she needed a “spotter,” but the General forgot to anticipate just how good you’d feel tightly squeezing her member. Maybe you’d be even more of a distraction than she thought…

“But General…you’re the one who asked me to—”

“I know what I said!”

She gave your hips one last squeeze before raising her arms to grab the bar above her, keen on doing a few chest presses while her cock was stuffed inside you. This was definitely unprofessional and dangerous by any means, but Feixiao was a strong woman. You trusted her to be able to handle herself during a workout, even if she might be distracted by your fluttering pussy.

“Alright, don’t move. Let me show you how strong your General is…” Feixiao purred and took the bar off the handles. The weights, intimidatingly massive, posed no threat to Feixiao as she pushed them up and down with no struggle. From where you were sitting, the sight of Feixiao flexing her muscles was just drool-worthy, watching as a thin sheen of sweat made her muscles glisten, the way they rippled with each pump of her arms. Not to mention how with each push of the weights, Feixiao’s cock throbbed inside you, almost as if it were aching to thrust with each rep. 

You felt as if you could get pregnant just by watching her workout.

“Babe, babe…” Feixiao grunted, her teeth gritting together. “You’re squeezing me…” 

You snapped out of your daze and looked down, watching as your pussy was practically clamping down on Feixiao and milking her. Though Feixiao hadn’t come yet, it sure as hell felt like it to her. “Sorry!” You exclaimed, trying to relax, though it was difficult to achieve as you couldn’t stop yourself from bouncing slightly on her dick. 

“It’s…fine…” Feixiao’s chest heaved as she stared down at you squeezing her length, some of your slick pooling at her base and forming a creamy ring. “…Fuck.” 

Your girlfriend suddenly lifted the bar up to the holders and set it there, carefully shimmying down so she can sit up and grab your hips. At the sudden movements, her heavy cock dragged wonderfully against your walls and caused you to let out a whine. “Maybe today should be a leg day instead.”

She chuckled and firmly grabbed your ass before making you bounce up and down on her lap. The sudden propulsion of your pussy getting pistoned by her dick had you throwing your head back sharply. “Feixiao…!” 

Your beloved General simply flashed you a wolfish smile before leaning in to bite your neck, deciding right then and there that fucking you incoherent would be a better workout than chest presses. At least for today.

LINGSHA

“Yes, I’ll get back to you as soon as possible once the results come back. How does an appointment in four weeks sound?” 

“Sounds good! Thank you Miss Lingsha!”

Your girlfriend smiled and waved off another customer coming to her for her remedies. However, despite her calm exterior, her thighs were quivering under the desk, all tension leaving her brow as she exhaled shakily and reached under. There, hiding just below her desk was you, pumping one of Lingsha’s cocks in your hand while your mouth pleasured the other. Just feeling the way you licked and stroked her two members had Lingsha whining and dropping her pen, unable to resist pushing your head down to bob further along her length. 

“You really have no shame, do you?” She sighed, running her fingers across your scalp and moving down to tilt your chin upwards. Your eyes flitted up to meet hers, lips still suckling greedily on her cock as your hand paused its motions. Both of Lingsha’s hemipenes were erect and dripping with precum, spilling onto your lips and fingers as she resisted the urge to just take you on the table. 

“Sawhy…” you said in a muffled voice, mouth too full of cock to respond properly. Lingsha just chuckled at your attempts to apologize, gently pulling you off her length so you could speak. “Don’t talk with your mouth full.” 

You swallowed the saliva and precum that had built up in your mouth and groaned, clearly drunk off Lingsha’s scent now. You tried to go back to sucking her off, opening your mouth to take her in again, but Lingsha playfully pushed you away with a finger to your forehead.

“Ehh?”

“Calm down, I need a break…” Lingsha heaved, her cocks twitching with need while she steadied herself. “I have another appointment soon. I don’t want to make a huge mess under—”

There was a knock at the door, causing Lingsha to groan. “Yes, come in.” She responds, casting a glare towards you so you don’t get any ideas. You simply smile at her and lick your lips, trying to play innocent as the next customer comes inside. As Lingsha is talking however, you knew you wouldn’t be able to keep your hands off her, her cocks throbbing tantalizingly in front of you just begging for you to touch her. 

It didn’t take long for you to grasp one of her shafts again and take the other one in your mouth, causing Lingsha to stutter mid sentence.

“Is something wrong Miss Lingsha?”

“N-No— nngh…everything is fine!” 

Her thighs twitched as she felt your mouth engulf her bulbous tip, biting her bottom lip as she shot a messy load down your throat while the other one completely coated your hands in her cum. It was a miracle she even managed to keep quiet as she did, especially in front of another customer.

“Oh, alright then. So, I was looking for a remedy…”

As the customer trailed off, Lingsha subtly shot a glare at you from above the desk, watching as you licked up traces of her cum and cleaned her cocks up. Nevertheless, it was still quite a mess down there, but Lingsha had bigger things to worry about. 

It will be a long day before her lunch break with you under there.

HERTA

“Madame Herta! Are you in there? Madame Herta?”

Furious knocks rapped at Herta’s office door, but the scientist didn’t utter a single peep. Too engrossed in showering you with affection as you sat on your mistress’ lap, all Herta could hear were the cute whines that left your throat and the lewd squelches of your cunt gripping her strap like it was the last one in the universe. 

“Madame Herta! Your meeting is in half an hour!” 

Herta simply rolled her eyes at her assistant’s frantic words. The other society members wouldn’t dare start the meeting without her, they could wait a little while longer while Herta busied herself with you. Yes, there’s no need to rush. Herta is just going to sit right here and have you squirm on her cock until you can't take it anymore. It had been weeks since she finally had the chance to be alone with you, and she wasn’t going to pull out anytime soon. 

“…Herta?”

“Quiet now.” She tsks and drums her fingers against her desk, not even facing you as she was staring directly at the way her strap sucked deeper into your cunt. She chewed her bottom lip and noted how much slick was gathering at the base of her cock, the white ring surrounding the silicone making her imagine you cleaning it off with your mouth. ‘Her lips would look beautiful sucking me off…’ Herta wonders to herself ‘Maybe I can hide her under the table at the meeting…no, too risky. Ruan Mei would notice easily.’

“Herta…” You whine again, wanting her to pay attention to you. She was, technically speaking, but you wanted her to look at you instead of drooling over your pussy. “What is it, you needy girl?” Herta exhaled sharply, finally looking up at you and pinching your cheek. “I’m just admiring you for a second and you’re already complaining. Honestly, I should leave you here right now and not even bother to make you come.”

“No!” You exclaim desperately, clinging to her shoulders and looking up at her with big, teary eyes. Herta could be so mean to you sometimes! You just wanted her attention, and it didn’t help that she kept edging you instead of moving like she promised. “Oh, don’t look at me like that. Now you’re going to make me look like the bad guy.” Herta sighed and cupped your face, giving your cheek a small pinch. “I am merely teasing, little one. But I can see when you’ve had enough.” 

She kissed your pouting, plump lips and shifted her hips, the snuggled strap on starting to plow into you at a shallow pace. The tip of the faux cock pounded relentlessly against that little bundle of nerves that had you arching your back. Oh how pretty you looked whining in front of Herta…your girlfriend had to hold herself back from reaching for her phone and taking a few photos of you bouncing. Tits in her face and your pussy creaming around her cock, Herta was starting to lose her cool. 

“Mm, that’s right…bounce on my cock little one, you need to come don’t you? Come for me…” Herta gave your rear a tiny pat and pulled you in for a kiss, lost in tasting your tongue and swallowing up any moans you let out. 

“Miss Herta!”

“Mmmph…five more minutes!” Herta pulled away from you with a growl in her tone, glaring at her assistant through the door as the string of saliva connecting you broke. “Tell the other members to wait just a little longer, I am finishing something important.” 

Right on top of the papers that Herta needed for her meeting, she grabbed your waist and hoisted you up to sit at her desk, pounding you into the table and soiling her precious reports with your cum. She didn’t care, honestly. So long as she had proof of your private time together, Herta was satisfied. 

[bogleech]

Actually my CURRENT completely serious personal list of animals I'd add to our current world and specifically local to where I live is as follows. I have shared some of these before but my list is always evolving:

1) A big tarantula sized lousefly because I think they look awesome, would be like vampire bats in that they can bite anything but don't naturally mess with humans. Everyone would find these scary, I would keep one as a pet.

2) a freshwater amphibious barnacle. Larva would have to crawl out of the water and start growing in dirt or mud with long roots. Would smell bad to attract and catch flies when it's exposed to air. In water could catch things like ostracods. I would raise these in pots of dirty scummy water on my balcony. Pokemon would make a poison type Barbacle form out of them.

3) a big huge 12-15 foot long predatory amphibian that looks like specifically this toy of Crassigyrinus. Basically just like a crocodile in size, niche and danger level but slimy and would like cold northern rivers so I can go see them and feed them raw chicken off our fishing docks.

4) a creature exactly like this idiot looking prehistoric lamprey reconstruction, but with a horrible mouth that can bite you like the cookie cutter shark/cookie cutter animals I was hypothesizing. These would live wherever #3 lives so they could have a good food source (#3 should regenerate really well like an axolotl) and so I could catch them and keep them in aquariums

5) a predatory spiny katydid like this guy but as huge as a New Zealand Weta and maybe camouflaged like a clump of lichens

6) a species of glow worm gnats that are maybe just modestly twice as big and just about everywhere in the world in trees and stuff

7) a giant python size freshwater ribbon worm, just like the marine ones with paralyzing venom that swallow whole big fish. Just want one that lives closer. It should be able to come on land, too. I just want the mongolian death worm to be real.

8) a single freshwater cephalopod and I nominate a flapjack octopus big enough to eat a man. I just want the cuero to be real.

9) basket star that hangs from trees and catches birds and stuff. I know echinoderms use seawater as blood but maybe it could fill itself with salty mucus? Maybe it should also protect itself by stinging all over. I'm tired of getting stung by boring nettles in the woods, I wanna get stung instead by spiny tree tentacles.

10) a single surviving pterosaur that evolved to be vampiric and should look as close as possible to the stirge from Dungeons and Dragons

just to clarify that's this one, the one that looks like a miserable piece of shit

[k1mbe3rly]

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO AN NSFW ALPHABET FOR THE SALESMAN PRETTY PLEASE WITH A CHERRY ON TOP IM BEGGING ‼️ 😭💕🙏🧎‍♀️‍➡️

The Salesman NSFW alphabet

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

he probably doesn’t do much, maybe he’ll clean you up but after that he’s fixing himself up mainly because he has to go and get people to join the games

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favorite body part about you is your shoulder , he bites into it and sometimes leaves small cuts

His favorite body part about himself is his fingers, especially since he uses a gun and very skilled with his hands, he also loves to finger you

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

This man would make you filled with his cum, dirty you everywhere, face, mouth, tits, stomach, and on your pussy lips, seeing you a mess is amazing to him and maybe he snaps a photo of you

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

His dirty secret is wanting to fuck you with his gun

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

I would say he’s not a virgin but he doesn’t have sex often, because of his job he’s focused on that more than sex

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Missionary. All the way, the way you’re tits bounces, your face, just everything

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Not once he is goofy and never would be

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He’s groomed, if he can shave his beard than he definitely shaves down there

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Very hardcore serious, you’ll see him so into it that his eyes go dead

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Not at all

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Gun play, Knife play, slight pain kink, degrading, praising and hair pulling

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

UMM THE BED? or anythjng private

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Dirty talking and revealing clothes

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Carry a loaded gun to you when having sex

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

he’s a giver for sure. He does like when you give him head but most of the time he loves devouring your list and rubbing your clit with the handle of his knife or his gun

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

He’s fast and rough mostly, he just loves the way his cock goes in and out fast and the way you squirm

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

not really, he likes to take his time espically since he’s a big fan of teasing

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He’ll take risk but not often

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He can last many rounds, he’s endless

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

no toys

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

very into teasing, he likes to edge you a bit before he shoves his cock into you

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He growls and groans

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Sometimes he likes to act like he’s forcing you to suck him off just to place a gun to your head as you suck on his cock, obviously it’s not loaded

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

7 inches straight, a bit thick

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

not high, but maybe once he met you it goes to like medium high

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He doesn’t really sleep after, he’s just sweaty and likes to keep himself professional

[screamlet]

“I wish you would write a fic where…” Through whatever contrivance, Buck tries to woo Tommy back through trivia. Maybe he gets Tommy’s team in on it, or the emcee/host - but it’s all Tommy-themed questions because Buck is trying to prove he knows him. Does it work? Maybe it’s all surface level and it hurts Tommy as much as he appreciates it. Maybe he revealed more than he thought and Buck was listening, taking it all in. Maybe Tommy decided to participate against him and inadvertently reveals something or accidentally says he loves him or something. If you would like it, I humbly offer whatever you can do with this premise!

heeeeey it took one million years but here's something!!! i love shenanigans, i hope this lives up to them.

bucktommy fix-it, 2k

read on the ao3!

---

Tommy's not exactly kidnapped.

He's met in the parking lot at Harbor by Hen, Karen, and a couple of big smiles, and then shoved into the backseat of their car and driven off somewhere. 

"You know, it's been my experience that some people text when they want to hang out," Tommy says.

"So you did ignore my voicemails!" Karen yells. "I knew it."

"It's not personal!" Tommy says.

"I'm taking it very personal," Hen replies. "Like hell you're leaving the Christmas card list again." 

"I'll move."

"Not in this housing market."

Tommy groans because it's true. 

And see, that's a little crazy but a little fun, to know that they care enough to abduct him and take him out for the night. It's then not really surprising that Howie's waiting for them at the bar they used to frequent ages ago, when Tommy was still at the 118. 

"I got the cuffs," Howie announces, a pair of very-real looking handcuffs dangling from his fingers.

"Those better not be for me," Tommy says as Karen pulls him out of the car with shocking strength. 

"Don't worry, they're not LAPD property," Hen assures him. "They're Bobby's."

"Please stop making me learn things," Tommy says.

He's already handcuffed. Howie's living-with-a-toddler sleight-of-hand has gotten unreal. 

It's around this time that one shock wears off and another dawns: this is a scheme and Tommy is trapped.

"No no no no, whatever you're doing—"

"Chim, no!"

The bar's tables have been cleared from the center to make two long tables facing each other. Fine, cute, two teams, it's now clear to Tommy that he has to win Evan back or something with trivia. The difference, though, are the two chairs in the center, where Evan is already sitting (and handcuffed). He turns around, almost tipping the chair over except Eddie catches him. 

"Fine, whatever," Tommy says as he's sat in the chair next to Evan. To make things better/worse (because Evan's so fucking squirmy), their chairs are put back to back so they can be tied together, too. "Oh, we're going full Last Crusade, are we, Howie?" Tommy has to grunt because Athena ties a really, really good knot and again: he wishes he knew less. 

"If you had answered your phone," Bobby says coolly. "If you had bubbled less and texted more—"

Tommy whips his head around and smashes his skull right into Evan's. "Goddamn—you saw that? Why didn't you text, if you were just sitting there watching me type?"

Evan struggles against everything keeping them together, then finally says, "Because you left and you didn't want me! If you wanted me, you would have called! And now we're—" One more hard thrash that gets Tommy in the shoulder. "Kidnapped and this is your fault."

"It's my fault? You wanted me to give up—"

"No I didn't! I said something dumb and you walked out before—"

"No, no, no, we can talk later," Eddie says. "It's time for Buckley-Kinard Family Feud."

Tommy and Evan turn their heads at the same time. "The hell are you talking about?" Tommy asks. 

"It's time to draft your teams," Hen announces. "I'm hosting, so I'm removing myself from the pool."

"This isn't fair! It's Buck's family—"

"You didn't just call me that in front of everyone," Evan hisses. 

"It's Buck's family against me, I don't have anyone—"

"I'm drafting myself," Howie announces. "Buck, your turn."

"Fine, I pick Maddie," Evan replies.

"Don't sound too thrilled," she replies. 

"Your next pick?" Hen asks Tommy.

"I told you, I don't—"

Bobby comes over to his side.

"You're insane," Tommy says. 

"That's not fair!" Evan yells.

"I met him first, Buck," Bobby says placidly. 

"Yeah, but—ugh, fine, then I pick Athena." Evan turns his head and bumps into Tommy's again. "You better not pick Eddie."

"I'm picking Karen," Tommy says. "She's my friend who's a lesbian—"

He can feel Evan tense against his back, probably out of frustration and a deep, deep desire to slam his skull into Tommy's again. He doesn't know how Evan resists.

"I've been bisexual for like, nine months, could you cut me some slack?" Evan asks.

"You spent an entire afternoon reading me articles and watching videos about the three-body problem and you couldn't fucking bother—"

"Because then I'd know," Evan yells. "I'd know that you and me were too good to be true, and I'd know that it was just temporary, and I'd know that you can't live your whole life one way and suddenly a guy kisses you and everything, everything is different, and your life's completely changed! I'd find something that would tell me it can't happen, it's probably not real, and then I'd realize I was wasting your time because I can never really change. If I looked at us too hard, I'd know it was just—"

Tommy's so overwhelmed, his chest so tight, that all he can manage to say is: "Yeah, it's called biphobia, and if you had asked, I don't know, one of the three gay people in your life—"

"I didn't know what to ask, Tommy! Fuck!" Evan tries to struggle out of their bindings again, but then he stops. "Apologize to me for being such a dick about this." 

The room is tense and quiet, eerily quiet, until Tommy finally says, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, okay? You're right and I'll stop throwing that at you. It's really unfair. It's unfair of me and unfair of, I don't know, the whole world, that made you think this could never be for you."

"That you could be it for me," Evan corrects.

"Sure, whatever." Tommy's voice is nowhere near as light and bitchy as he meant that to sound. "So are we gonna play this game or what? Now that we've got some teams of dubious quality?"

Bobby takes a seat at what is now, apparently, the Team Tommy table. "I know you like fresh pasta because then you can have soft pasta and no one will call you a heretic for not liking it al dente." 

"That's psychotic," Tommy says. "And no one cooks it true al dente, it's always just barely cooked and I shouldn't have to chomp on pasta like a horse to enjoy it!"

Evan says, "And all of you said I was the weird one and he was the normal one."

"Literally no one said that, Buck," Eddie says. "You're both absurd, that's why you're perfect for each other."

"Well," Evan says, "I know you were thinking it."

"You were thinking it, and sometimes thoughts have to make it out of your mouth for people to hear them," Tommy snaps.

The entire room bursts into an uproar and Tommy tries to struggle out of his chair again. "Fine, fine, I'm a huge hypocrite, can I get a point for admitting it!" 

"Yes, just one," Hen says. "Alright, gather up, teams. Bobby and Maddie, you're up first."

"This is a nightmare, this is a nightmare," Tommy whispers to himself. "I crashed my helicopter and this is hell."

"Hey, Mr. Keeping Your Thoughts Inside, we can't hear the question," Howie says.

"You're on my team, you have to be nice to me!"

Howie dramatically pops his piece of gum and says nothing.

"This first question is in the category of fashion," Hen reads off her phone. The TV over the bar has turned on to show a Family Feud style board with four options and Tommy can't believe his vision of hell is this detailed. It's impressive. "Name one novelty apron belonging to either Buck or Tommy."

Bobby slams his hand on the buzzer that someone brought for the occasion. "Tommy has one that says Warning: Fowl Language and it has a rooster on it." Bobby points at Tommy and says, "Sal gave it to you for your fake birthday, which is June 13, but your real birthday is in November."

The room is quiet again.

"You had a fake birthday?" Evan asks.

Tommy looks up at the ceiling. This means that he and Evan's heads are touching and he can't help but lean into it a little. He doesn't go any further, though. "Did I mention I'm like… that there's a lot of things wrong with me?"

"Yeah, these are really struggling to stay in the quirks category," Karen says. "But hell yes, one point! Let's go, Bobby!"

Bobby rejoins the team and Hen strolls down to their side of the room. "Now, Karen: can you name another apron that Tommy owns?"

Karen winces. "Okay, this can be any apron?"

"Any apron," Hen agrees.

"Alright, then I'm gonna say… a plain, utilitarian grey apron that he wears because he doesn't want to use the nice ones." 

Hen says, "Show me boring!"

The word charcoal appears on the board with a (2) next to it.

"Two charcoal ones?" Maddie asks. "Tommy, love yourself."

"Yeah, I think that's the point here and I hate it," Tommy replies.

"Alright, Chim," Hen says. "Name another apron in Tommy's kitchen."

"I think we all saw Buck's lockscreen this summer," Howie says. "Tommy in a sleeveless shirt with a black apron that said Flippin' Awesome and had two spatulas crossed on the front."

"Show me spatulas!" Hen calls out. Another point. 

"Cheap shot," Tommy says. "Evan gave me that, of course you knew that."

"Hey, genius, how do you think people learn things about each other?" Howie asks. "Hen, take it away." 

"Alright, Team Buck," Hen says, wandering over to Maddie. "Name an apron you can find in Buck's kitchen." She turns her head and says, "And don't think we didn't notice he's Evan again."

Tommy turns his head away and whispers to Evan, "Can you make them stop? Please?"

"Sorry, do you think I wanted to be tied and handcuffed to you tonight?" A beat. "Okay, that's not—whatever, I'm suffering here, too."

"Are you?"

Evan huffs. "I'm tired of chasing after people who don't want me, and you don't want me." 

Tommy stays quiet as Team Buck racks up bonus points for Evan's punny apron collection. 

"I thought you'd call or text, or come over," Evan says, voice quieter. "You said, no matter how bad I want to be, so I thought… I don't know. I waited, Tommy. That didn't feel like the end. And you never answered my voicemails, so."

"I haven't checked my voicemail in five months," Tommy admits. "I saw you left a couple the week after and I just—I couldn't. I knew I'd—I'd press play and before you'd even said Hey I would be in my truck on my way to you."

"And would that have been so bad?"

Tommy drops his head down. "I wanted a clean break so we could both walk away." 

"Tommy," Evan whispers. "No matter how bad you want that to be true… it's not."

Tommy nods to himself. "I'm sorry."

"I should have come after you," Evan says. "I should have broken down your door or, I don't know, hung onto your helicopter like Captain America."

"Yeah, good luck," Tommy laughs. 

Between them, Evan's fingertips reach for Tommy's. They cling the best they can, and Tommy—he clings back. 

"Do you mean it or do you just want to get away from everyone?" Evan asks.

"Well, apparently I can't get away from them." Evan laughs dryly, so Tommy clutches his fingers again. "I mean it. Both of those things. If they take the cuffs off, I won't run. Will you?"

Evan laughs. "Only if you'll follow."

"Then we should make a break for it."

"You got it."

---

read on the ao3!

[fangirl-erdariel]

One thing that sometimes bugs me in the comparisons to Tolkien is that - it's not even like Tolkien's works are entirely devoid of sexual violence?? Like. He doesn't go into graphic detail on it, it's not something Tolkien has in central focus. But it most definitely is there. (And hey, Tolkien also doesn't go into detail on non-sexual violence if he doesn't need to)

More specific examples and rambling on the topic under the cut, bc this got long on what is already a long post

It really doesn't take a particularly attentive reader to figure out Wormtongue's intentions and desires regarding Éowyn, for instance; like yeah he never lays a hand on her as far as we know, but the threat of what could have happened if he'd gotten his way is... pretty obvious

And Silmarillion has its share of male characters desiring women (or the political power of those women's families, depending) and attempting (sometimes succeeding) to force them into marriage. I don't feel like getting involved in the debate of whether Aredhel initially not being "wholly unwilling" to marry Eöl and stay in Nan Elmoth disqualifies her from the list or whether the amount of coercion involved is enough to still make it count.

But Lúthien most definitely is kidnapped against her will, and though she escapes before anything happens, Celegorm's intention explicitly was to marry her whether she wanted or not. Upon seeing Lúthien, Morgoth, the evil dark lord "conceived in his thought an evil lust, and a design more dark than any that had yet come into his heart", and I think we all can figure out what that is (and his lines in the Lay of Leithian, talking of Lúthien as "a pretty toy for idle hour" and speaking about kissing and then bruising and crushing pretty flowers... it's not particularly subtle), even if once again he doesn't get to actually do so.

And there's Maeglin, who desires Idril, and who is promised "the possession of Idril" as reward for betraying the location of the hidden realm of Gondolin, "and indeed desire for Idril -- led Maeglin the easier to his treachery"

And in the children of húrin bit there's Aerin of the folk of Hador whom the invader lord Brodda takes as wife against her will. And then of course there's Míriel of Númenor, whom her cousin Pharazôn forcibly marries in order to seize her throne that is rightfully there

All those are just what I can think of off the top of my head; I'm sure there'd be more examples if I cared to go digging through the material, but I can't be bothered

So, like. Yeah. Sure. Tolkien doesn't really ever use the word "rape" for the things that happen (he seems to mainly use that word in the more archaic meaning of large-scale destruction and/or robbery by violent means, rather than in its modern definition). And in Lúthien and Idril's cases, of course ultimately nothing happens, they escape and all. And as noted, Aredhel's case is more debatable since she wasn't "wholly unwilling". But still.

I'm pretty dang sure that Tolkien understood that a woman being married against her will would be subjected to sexual violence, and is assuming that to be the reader's understanding of the situation when those cases come up. Gríma's, Morgoth's, and Maeglin's intentions towards the women they desire are definitely to be understood as violent and with no care towards what the women in question want (and at least in Morgoth's case, judging by Lay of Leithian, even actively delighting in the idea of doing it by force to an unwilling victim)

And just. I don't know. It kind of bugs me when people act like Tolkien's setting and works are unrealistic because they're devoid of sexual violence? Like. Well first of all, as earlier posters in the thread have pointed out, massive amounts of sexual violence aren't necessarily realistic to begin with. But like also it is a thing that does happen in the setting too... I don't even mean this as a like "oh isn't it so fun doesn't this make the books so much more adult" or anything, and I understand people who enjoy Tolkien's books because it doesn't have like explicit rape scenes the way some other authors do. I just like... the fact that people keep claiming that sexual violence pretty much doesn't even exist in Middle-Earth, when it very much does, it's just kind of left as a threat and an implication or spoken of in very vague terms, is kind of baffling? Honestly it kinda gives the impression that the person saying it either hasn't read Tolkien since they were thirteen or doesn't actually spend the time to understand what the text they're reading means beyond the most obvious surface level. Or they're deliberately saying something that isn't true because it serves some point they want to make

Like, just because something is not shown explicitly in graphic detail with pages upon pages of description, doesn't mean it's not there in the story or the setting at all? You're supposed to pick up on implications and read between the lines and understand those as deliberate choices from the author and a part of the story and setting too?

Someone over on Discord asked, "I'm morbidly curious: How BAD is A Song of Ice and Fire in terms of the authenticity George claims it to be?"

My reply was straightforward:

The long and the short of it is that ASOIAF is basically a vehicle for GRRM to present both his rape fetish and his Hobbesian view on human nature and has less historical accuracy than Frozen or most other Disney movies.

That's actually a good way to think of it, now that I've said it--he's Family Unfriendly, they're Family Friendly, but both have the same relationship with History: just Pure Aesthetic with no consideration for how the worldbuilding would work.

[becausebuckley]

michelle's buddie fic recs: week 5!

i won't lie folks, these rec lists are the only reason i know what week it is. but hey, every week brings us closer to the return of 911! in the meantime, enjoy these fics <3

this is a mix of fics with all ratings, so some include NSFW content. please take a look at both the ratings and the fic tags before reading! some might also contain spoilers for season 8.

if you come across something you like in this list, remember to show some love to the author by leaving kudos and a comment!

am i who you think about in bed? | rarakiplin/@hoediaz | 6.8k | M

eddie sleeps with men that aren't buck until, well, you know. eddie's hoe phase is something so very dear to me <3 i love how this fic captures him (and that phase lol) so much!! and That Moment in the bar... unmatched

and if someone asked me if i love you (i'd lie) | forgetmyname/@kingmieczyslaw | 10.3k | E

Eddie has a concussion. Suddenly he can't lie. It would be fine if he wasn't trying his best to not confess his undying love for Buck. this is such a fun fic <3 i love the firefam's reactions to eddie's predicament!!

and longingly i long | effervescentwolf/@effervescentwolf | 14k | M

Asking for what you want is asking too much of Buck, except it isn’t really. Not when it’s Eddie. i read this fic, immediately clicked the little back to the top button, and still have it open in a tab to reread asap, that's how good this is. the hurt/comfort hits so so hard, truly marvellous!!

bobby versus buddie | songbvrd/@songbvrd | 10.4k | M

Five times Bobby tried to gently hold Buddie's hands and tell them they were in love, and one time they got the picture. i adore how this fic captures bobby and athena and bobby's relationship with buck and eddie and also buddie <3 just a delight to read!!

buck, bothered and bewitched | bellabrady | 5.8k | not rated

Buck gets turned into a Golden Retriever. SUCH a fun fic. i really do think that animal transformation-esque fics are an untapped market... this is a brilliant example of just how good they can be!!

give me a call if you ever get lonely. | dylaesthetics | 7.7k | E

 Now that Eddie’s come out as gay, Buck helps him explore his kinks and fetishes. Not in the way you think. And later, exactly in the way you think. truly what a brilliant fic concept... hot and fun and cute <3

i just wanna tell you how i'm feeling | calvingseason | 7.7k | T

healing through shitty memes sure is cathartic. i do love a good crack treated seriously fic <3 eddie in this one genuinely had me laughing out loud!

if you say it with your hands | hammersmiths/@henwilsons | 9.9k | T

Eddie starts casually falling asleep against Buck, and Buck is very normal about it. oh the joy of the literal sleeping together tag!! this is soft and cute and just perfect <3 one of my favourites to reread!

leave the light on (i'll be coming home) | HMSLusitania/@hmslusitania | 44.4k | M

An accident on a call leaves Buck with custody of Chris after Eddie is... missing presumed. While they navigate their new family circumstances -- and fight to stay together, despite Eddie's parents' best efforts -- a John Doe wakes up in a coma ward with no memory of his own life beyond the knowledge he has a son named Christopher and, somehow, he needs to get home. i've been waiting to be in the right mood to read this one - since joining the fandom last year, it's probably the most recced fic i've seen! and, well, having read it, i totally get that. a wonderfully written fic, i loved the OCs but also adored buck and christopher here <3

let me know you (bedhead and morning breath) | burnthatbridge/@burnthatbridge | 6.2k | E

Buck hasn't gotten off since the lightning strike. Eddie watches him do something about it. THIS FIC. holy shit this fic. so good, so hot, so fun, so them!!

love me most | EiraLloyd/@unlifeira | 11.3k | T

Eddie’s not impressed that Buck and Tommy’s first date was supposed to be dinner and a movie. He thinks he can come up with something more creative, and he takes Buck on a date to prove his point. It’s a fake date, obviously. It’s not like he’s in love with Buck or anything.) i'm obsessed with eddie's behaviour in this fic <3 such a wonderful buddie dynamic!!

no takebacks | ever_yours/@ever-yours118 | 4.5k | M

In which Buck accidentally sends a confession to Eddie, lingers in the bargaining stage of grief, and maybe doesn’t end up regretting it so much, after all. love love love buck here, so true to character!! such a fun fic <3

PTA "coup d'état" | Bookworm0303/@insertlovelyperson | 26.5k | T

Buck attends some PTA meetings for Eddie. It goes about as well as you'd expect. this fic has so many funny moments, i can't even count how many times i had to put my phone down just to laugh. i especially loved ravi!! oh, the pta shenanigans... delightful fic!!

[allllium]

Hi! I'm not sure if requests are open, but if they aren't feeling free to ignore this.

So my birthday was on the more recent side (the 19th) and, most my birthdays (this year included) ive ended up crying and with everyone doing more important things so I end up with like maybe 1-3 people who celebrate it like a week late, and as a result I just don't tell people my birthday,,

So I was thinking sirius x reader where they're still both crushing on each other and he finds out he missed readers birthday for the aforementioned reasons jdkdkdksjdk

I'm sorry if it's a odd request, and it's totally chill if you don't do this. thank you for your time, and I hope you have a good day/night and don't forget to stretch, eat and drink some water!

~ this isn't an odd request at all, I get this feeling a lot. I have cried on every single birthday I can remember so I definitely get you. Either way I really hope you had a good birthday and hopefully the next one will be even better.

~ Fluff, Hurt/Comfort

Time to Celebrate

~ Sirius is very offended he didn't get to celebrate your birthday

You don't even know how long you've been friends with Sirius. One day his friend James, got a crush on your friend Lily, and the rest is history.

That being said, you've never told them your birthday. Year after year went by and you thought there was no point to bring it up. Telling them your birthday meant pressure and expectations. It meant being possibly being ignored and being alone once again even though you shouldn't be.

Over the years of growing closer to Sirius, he's never even asked. You don't blame him. He has a lot going on. You can't expect your birthday to be on his list of high priorities.

Sirius feels different.

The only friend that knows your birthday is Lily. You should've known this would happen eventually.

"What the bloody hell is wrong with you!" Sirius yells as he runs down the hall in your direction.

"Is that a trick question?" You ask, turning to face Sirius. "And is the running really necessary?"

"Why didn't you tell me about your birthday!?"

"You never asked." You say simply and wait as he slows to a walk and reaches you.

"That's a good reason and you know it. Explain please." He practically demands.

"I didn't think it was necessary. It's just a day."

"No it's not. It's a celebration."

"When's the last time you wanted to celebrate your birthday without James making you?"

"That's not the point!"

"It kinda is." You roll your eyes with a small smirk, and turn to walk away.

"But it's important." He follows right behind you. "You're important."

You stop walking for a split second, "It's just never been a big thing for me. I've never really had anyone to celebrate with." You shrug.

"But now you do." His voice has an upset tone laced somewhere in it.

"I know. I just- I didn't want to risk it."

He doesn't say anything for a few seconds. "Well come on then, we have a couple of birthdays to make up for."

He grabs your hand to pull you with him.

"Right now? We have class, Sirius."

"We have classes all the time, It'll be fine."

He takes you out of the school to get things like cake and decorations.

Something for every year he missed.

[strawberriesoup]

catch me if you can PT. 1,, ✮⋆˙

☆ street racer!han jisung x cop!fem!reader

☆ genre: street racing AU, angst, fluff, action, strangers to lovers, illegal activity

☆ warnings: lots of breaking of the law (like, felony-level breaking of the law), cursing, fire, injury/pain, near death experience, suggestive content

☆ wc: 6.5k

☆ a/n: i'm so happy i finally got to sit down and write this first part out! honestly i'm pretty pleased with it, and i hope this motivation can stay for the remaining parts! for now, enjoy!

if you make it all the way through, please leave some feedback! i always love to hear other people’s thoughts!! your feedback is what keeps me writing stories like these ❤️❤️

☆ taglist: @jisunggy @holly-here @hannamoon143 @fly-you-dam-fools @chancloud8 @hannieslittlerockstar @vixensss @skzpvol @gxtwllsn @yinzgarden @kayleefriedchicken @nightmarenyxx @ick2001 @dwesion

if you would like to be added to my series taglist or my general taglist, send me a comment or an ask! <3

── ࣪˖ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ──

Unstoppable, that’s what you are. There’s just something about the way your engine rumbles when you shove in the clutch and shift to a higher gear, how you can feel your tires grip the road beneath you, it’s thrilling. Yellow lines blur into one as you grip the wheel tighter, focusing your attention solely on the path ahead. Just a little farther.

Your blinker flashes as you signal your turn into the Wal-mart parking lot.

Really, you can’t imagine anything more unintresting than grocery shopping. There’s no excitement in searching through various assortments of oranges and grapes, no blaring horns and revving engines to go along with determining the best jug of milk to buy.

When you had joined the city police force, it’s safe to say that this is not how you were expecting to spend your wednesday afternoons.

How embarrassing. Yes, you know that shopping is a normal— and necessary— part of life, but that’s just the thing. It’s normal. Mundane, tedious, dull… Must you go on? A normal thing for normal people to be doing on normal days. Definitely not the action-filled life you had always dreamed of for all those years.

The bitter taste of disappointment fills your mouth as you sulk through the isles. It’s busy today. Groups of people bustle past, none of them paying you any mind. Good. You keep your head tucked towards the ground, not wanting to accidentally make eye contact with someone who might know you. In the back of your mind, you reason that it’s probably ridiculous to be feeling this way. Even still, you don’t lift your face.

The crime rate has been so low recently, with new police recruits popping up left and right, that you aren't even on duty today. While to most that might seem like good news, to you it’s probably the worst news all week. You wish that someone would just start a car chase or something, that way you might get a chance to break the speed limit. Instead,— since you like to manage your expectations somewhat realistically — you’re here, squinting at your shopping list and trying to keep your squeaking cart under control. The gods of choosing a functional shopping cart had not blessed you today.

After an unnecessarily long chat about missing puppies with the sweet old lady who probably broke the world record for the slowest grocery checkout time, you start the trek back out to your car. It shouldn’t be hard to find, given it’s painted a subtle bright crimson. You search the parking lot for the familiar vehicle. Where did you park again? You probably should have paid more attention.

Then, you hear it. At first, you think maybe it’s just the wind whistling around the building behind you. Are you hearing things? No, because there it is again. An unmistakable scream.

Groceries abandoned, you can feel your pulse leap into your temples as you sprint towards the direction of the sound. Whipping your head around, you struggle to get a grip on your surroundings, the midday sun reflecting off the pavement momentarily blinding you.

Another frantic shout brings you to your senses and you are finally able to pinpoint the source of the commotion. Not far off, a cloud of deep black smoke billows from a car on the street. The car had been capsized, shattered glass scattered in a ten-foot radius surrounding it. On first approach, you can’t even tell the front end from the back end. What’s completely unmistakable though, is the gut-dropping smell of an engine fire.

“Mom!” A childs cry rings out above the other panicked voices. A teenage boy holds the little girl in his arms as she rakes at his shoulder in a feeble attempt to break free and run towards the car.

Bystanders are shouting, trying to tear a man away from the door of the car by his arm, shirt, anything they could get a hold of. You can’t tell if the man’s hands are bleeding from the broken glass or from pulling on the door so hard. Who knows, maybe it’s both.

You don’t know if you’ve ever sprung into action so fast. One second you’re assessing the situation, the next you’re shoving people out of the way to access the door.

The window frame had been crushed so much you can barely even see inside the vehicle, let alone utilize it as a viable method of escape. Judging by the lack of law enforcement around the scene, you can tell the car hasn’t been on fire for long. Good. Even though the foul rank of the engine smoke invades your senses, it’s safe to say the vehicle won’t explode. Yet.

Maybe the other door isn’t stuck. You quickly move to the opposite side and tug at the handle, but immediately jerk your hand back when the metal burns your skin. Angrily, you tug a hand across your face. Think. You need to think. Come on, think.

There. A window that hadn’t been shattered, the back windshield. To access it, you’d have to crawl under the trunk and break it open. If you do that, there’s a good chance you won’t be able to turn back around easily once inside, if at all. You can’t tell to what degree the person inside is injured, but you take the lack of any sort of cry for help as a bad sign.

The desperate wails of the little girl make up your mind for you. There’s no time to lose. You need to get this done, and get it done fast.

Shrugging off your purse, jacket, and anything that could possibly get snagged in the car, you squeeze under the trunk. It’s uncomfortably warm, reminding you of the very real possiblility of explosion once the fire reaches the fuel tank. All your faith is funneled into your pocket knife as you jam the back of it into the windshield. Nothing.

Again, you wind back the knife. A yell escapes you as you once again ram it into the window with all your might. Still, it doesn’t yield.

Shit. shit. You have to get in there. You can see the outline of what looks to be a human form inside the car, but no movement. One more time. You can do this.

The man that had been tugging at the door is kneeling behind you, unable to fit underneath the car. He reaches under, stretching his red-stained fingers towards you. At first, you don’t understand what he’s trying to do. Then, it clicks. Wrapping his hand around your own, The knife is encompassed beneath both of your hands. The man’s voice is hoarse as he counts to three. Together, you drive the tool into the windshield.

Finally, the window shatters with a crash. Dark smoke pours out, stinging your eyes and forcing a cough from your lungs. Wasting no time, you squeeze the man’s hand before taking a deep breath and ducking inside.

Shattered glass slices open your palm and you hiss at the white flash of pain. There’s no time to check the damage right now, you’ll deal with injuries later. You tearily squint through the smoke, finally laying your eyes upon a still figure in the passenger’s seat. Still buckled in, she hangs awkwardly from the seat, supported by the seatbelt.

A drop of sweat falls into your eyes. The heat alone is suffocating, but paired with the smoke the conditions are nearly unbearable. The steadily ticking clock of oxygen deprivation hangs heavy over your head, you won’t be of much help if you’re passed out. You grunt as you stretch your arm up to reach for the buckle.

With a click, the woman falls from the seat. No movement. You can’t even tell if she’s breathing.

How the fuck are you going to get her out of here? The car interior around you suddenly feels too small, your vision beginning to spin. No, get a handle of yourself. These people are depending on you. That little girl is depending on you. The image of the little girl’s face, twisted with fear and desperation, fuels you to set your jaw and grab a hold of the woman’s arm.

If you can just pull her past you, you might be able to push her the rest of the way, getting her out as quickly as possible for medical attention, as EMS should be here soon. As if on cue, you hear blaring sirens steadily approching over the crackling of the fire.

Straining, you are able to tug at the woman until she’s past you. Blood roars in your ears as you use the rest of your energy to try and push her the rest of the way. It’s not graceful by any means, but you manage to shove her far enough towards the shattered window for her to be pulled out by a team of gloved hands.

You collapse onto the floor below. Dark fog breaches the corners of your vision. Is that the smoke? Maybe. You can’t even tell at this point. A cough wracks its way through your body as the pulse of adrenaline leaves you.

Well, at least you were able to help. You can feel your eyelids slowly blinking closed, despite your efforts to fight it.

What’s left of your vision is suddenly blocked by… a face? Holy shit. Did you die? In front of you hovers a face that looks like it was sculpted by the gods themselves. A perfectly angled nose sits between two dark eyes that remind you of the cool blanket of night. His lips are moving and you lament over the fact you can’t hear his voice due to an annoyingly loud ringing filling your ears. If this is what heaven is like, you don’t think you mind dying so much.

You can distantly feel your body being lifted as you drift out of conciousness.

── ࣪˖ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ──

“That was some crazy shit back there, y’know.”

You blink your eyes open, focusing on the source of the familiar voice next to you. It’s Seungmin, your patrol partner. He’s sitting on the edge of the ambulance, knee bouncing up and down. His stare, unreadable as always, greets you. You let out a much-needed sigh of relief. As much as he gets on your nerves, you are definitely more than happy to see a familiar face.

“Seungmin? What happened? Is that— ow, shit!” You sit up too fast from your stretcher and immediately need to lay back down due to a stabbing pain in your skull. “Is that lady okay?” as the sharp pain withdraws into a dull throb, the past events slowly resurface in your mind. Wait. That guy. The one who you saw just before you passed out, who was he? You had never seen him before. Was he even real?

“Well, I’m not sure if ‘okay’ is the right word to use, but she’s alive at least. She was rushed to the hospital along with her family members as soon as you got her out.” Seungmin crosses over to you, leaning on the edge of your stretcher. You can see him better now, and from here you can catch the slightest bit of worry in his features that was not evident in his voice previously. “Which, by the way, that little stunt of yours almost got you killed. If that guy hadn’t gotten you out of there when he did, you would have been crushed.”

So he was real.

According to Seungmin, right after you had been dragged out, the frame of the car completely collapsed; which would have effectively both trapped you inside and squished you. He’s about to continue with details about how next you probably would have caught on fire, before you punch him square in the arm, earning a cry of pain from both you and Seungmin. You shake the pain out of your bandaged hand as you are painfully reminded of that piece of glass that had cut you.

“Anyways,” you scowl at him when he sends you a not-so-apologetic look, “who was that guy? Is he a new police recruit? I’ve never seen him before.” The only reason you know that for sure is because you would never have forgotten that face. You can picture him in your mind right now. You’ve never seen anyone so… well, perfect.

“No, he’s not. Just some civilian who was stupid enough to jump into a flaming car to save your sorry ass,” Seungmin waves away your indignant defenses and heads off towards a group of officers outside the ambulance, “It was a hit and run, the bastard who caused this mess drove off someplace so we’re trying to see—”

“Where did he go?”

Seungmin faces you, caught off-guard. “What?”

“That guy, where’d he go?” You repeat your question, obviously not at all intrested in whatever was going on with the other officers.

Seungmin’s eyebrows lower as he rolls his eyes and turns away once more. “I dunno, haven’t seen him,” he comments over his shoulder helpfully. Then, he’s gone.

Ugh.

Fuck you, Kim Seungmin

── ࣪˖ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ──

You have to find him. You will not be able to function as a member of society without knowing that he’s an actual person and not just a result of some hallucination. You had asked every single one of the officers and bystanders at the scene if they knew even just his name (you did not appreciate Seungmin making faces at you the whole time, thank you very much) to no avail; nobody knew anything about this mysterious man.

Fine then. You’ll just have to find him yourself.

Weeks go by, and his face never leaves your mind. Sometimes you swear you can see a flash of his honey skin, or those gorgeous eyes, only to look up and realize with disappointment it is in fact, not him. You wonder how many random passerby you have given an unexplainably sour face. Not that it matters what they thought of you. They probably worked a nine to five at some boring old desk.

One night, Seungmin had caught you searching through the criminal records. Maybe it was a stretch, but hey, you were desperate. You had just reached the ‘H’ column when he snuck up behind you. Upon him tapping your shoulder with a “Whatcha doing” on his lips, you had jumped three feet in the air and quickly closed the tab, responding with a very convincing “Nothing!” and rushing out of the room.

Just a name, that’s all you need. Is that really too much to ask?

Suited up in your standard police attire, you wait in line at your favorite coffee place before your night shift with Seungmin. You had finally been scheduled a full eight hours, but honestly your mind was anywhere but work. The bustling coffee shop atmosphere and the overwhelming smell of coffee does nothing for your scattered thoughts. Why the hell are so many people in line for coffee at 10:00 at night?

“One iced americano for Han Jisung?” The barista calls out the next order.

No way. There’s actually no way.

You have to do a triple take to make sure your eyes aren’t deceiving you. It’s really him. You would recognize his face anywhere.

He’s just as stunning as when you had first seen him. Eyes that same dusky brown, nose that same perfect shape. He has a pair of sunglasses perched on top of his head, his hair falling from them in loose waves around his face, framing him like an artwork from the renaissance period. The way he holds himself, too. A casual swagger that so few people can pull off, but he wears it so naturally; completely at ease. One hand in his pocket, he smiles at the barista as she hands him his order, somehow lighting up the entire room with simply his expression.

You are so awestruck that it takes you a second to realize that he’s turned his attention directly to you.

When you do realize though, your heart drops right into your ass. Your first instinct is to jump your gaze to the floor or the ceiling, feigning nonchalance, but you’ve been hyper fixated on his face for so long you cannot bring yourself to look away.

His eyes spark with recognition. You can tell by the way his eyebrows raise amicably as he starts heading towards you. Your heart speeds up to about a million miles per hour.

That is until he looks you up and down. His expression drops and his eyes widen for just a fraction of a second before returning to his previous smile, but this time it feels just a little forced. As he passes you, he nods politely and sweeps past without so much as a word.

What just happened? You watch as he exits the coffee shop. Wait, no, you can’t lose him now, you at least need to thank him. He did save your life after all.

You hustle past the long line much less gracefully than he, catching him outside the door before he can cross the street.

“Hey, wait up!” You call after his retreating form. You see him pause, but he doesn't turn around as you jog up to him. “It’s you! Jisung, right?”

Finally, he faces you. His sunglasses now sit neatly on the bridge of his nose, obscuring his eyes from sight. You can’t detect any of the uncomfort from before in his features. Did you imagine that? Maybe he’s just in a hurry.

“That’s me,” Jisung says, a cute little chuckle punctuates the end of his sentence. His voice is sweet, reminding you of warm brown sugar and butter. Your heart skips a beat as he addresses you with that grin of his, “can I help you with anything, officer?”

It takes you a second to respond, the way he tilts his head at you whilst waiting for a response has you feeling all kinds of weird, bubbly feelings in your chest. You stomp them down and clear your throat.

“No, no I actually wanted to thank you. You know, for saving me. You really didn’t— I mean that was really… courageous of you. And stuff. Anyways. yeah, thanks.” You finish awkwardly, stumbling over your words. Damn it.

Jisung laughs. A beautiful sound, really.

“Thought I recognized you! You’re the pretty little thing who saved that lady from the fire. Gotta hand it to you, officer, you’ve got some guts in there.” He gestures to your badge with a tilt of his head, leaning back on the crosswalk pole and sticking one hand in his pocket.

You’re pretty sure your brain short-circuited at the words ‘pretty little thing’ and you’re not quite sure how to answer, your mouth opening and closing a few times, but no words falling from it.

Jisung grins at your tongue-tied state, letting out another amused huff of laughter and hitting the crosswalk button.

“I’ve got somewhere to be, but you stay safe out there ok? Don’t go jumping into any more flaming vehicles if you can possibly help it, next time I might not be there,” He clicks his teeth and you swear you can see him wink from under his shades. The crosswalk changes to give Jisung the right of way and he heads off across the street.

There you stand, a blushing mess, watching as he heads to a nearby parking spot.

Wait a second, is that his car?

Jisung closes the door to a Chevrolet Camaro, colored in a tasteful matte black. Are you kidding? No, this has got to be a joke, there’s no way he has that car. As the engine purrs to life, you can feel the rumbling vibration in your chest even from across the street. When he pulls out, it’s evident just how suped up it is. There’s an added spoiler on the back and… are those LED lights on the rims? That’s it. You might actually be in love.

The hum of the engine steadily approaches as he pulls up next to you on the street, rolling down the window and looking up at you and your wide eyes.

“Like what you see, officer?” Jisung raises his eyebrows teasingly, a smug little smirk playing on his lips. If it had been anyone else, you’re sure you would be enraged by the expression, but there’s something about him that makes it hot rather than insufferable. He hangs an elbow out the window, lightly tapping his fingers to the bass of some song that plays from his speakers as you take in the vehicle.

“Shut the fuck up, this is yours?” You raise your voice over the sound of the engine, leaning in closer so he can hear you. You momentarily forget that you’re technically on duty right now.

There it is again, that hearty laugh of his. Definitely one of your new favorite sounds.

“Yes ma’am, all mine,” Jisung pulls up his sunglasses, finally giving you a clear view of his face. His face that’s looking more mischievous by the minute. “Maybe one day you’ll do me the honor of taking you for a spin, how’s that sound?” He reaches out and lightly flicks his index finger up the bottom of your chin. Your stomach explodes with butterflies as a result.

“I’m…” You consider your options. Is he serious? He’s definitely flirting with you. Right? He literally just touched your chin while asking if you wanted a ride in his car. He’s definitely flirting. Yeah.

“I’m free tomorrow,” You blurt, against your better judgment. There’s no way in hell you’re going to turn down a opportunity like this.

“Same time, same place?”

You glance at your watch. 10:30 p.m. You should be in the patrol car with Seungmin right about now.

“That works,” You nod. Your answer is a little shaky, but you hide it well.

“Guess I’ll see you then, officer,” Jisung flashes you one last smile, scrunching up his nose and throwing you a half salute. He revvs up his engine once, twice, and then he’s gone.

Letting out a breath you didn’t know you were holding, your legs shake as you head back into the coffee shop to re-order a cup of coffee. You’re going to need it.

── ࣪˖ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ──

This is stupid. Like, really dumb. You can’t believe you’re doing this.

You’ve been sitting on a bench outside of the coffee shop for the past fifteen minutes. Granted, you’re the one who decided to show up fifteen minutes early, but you’re starting to regret that decision. At least it’s not cold out.

You had spent probably a good three hours debating what the hell you were going to wear. Might seem excessive but there were just so many points to consider. What if you come off too strong? but then again, you wouldn't want to underdress. Or overdress. It’s not even a date, he’s just giving you a ride around, right? Why are you stressing so much?

And so here you wait in your cute little mid-thigh skirt, having decided with a nod that it was a safe bet all around. Plus, it makes your legs look great.

You’re definitely thinking about this too hard.

A quick beep of a car horn catches your attention. You look up right as you feel the distinct purr of Jisung’s engine rumbling in your bones. Thank God, he actually came.

You’re not sure if you’re jittering from the excitement of going on a— Date? You really don’t want to make any assumptions because he hadn’t straight up asked you on a date per say— with the most gorgeous man you’d ever laid eyes on or the excitement of getting to ride in his car. Maybe both. You clench and unclench your fists in anticipation. You’re positively itching to feel what it’s like on the road.

Jisung exits the low car smoothly, heading towards you with a wave. His eyes scrunch up at the corners when he smiles, painting his expression with such a lovely friendliness that makes you want to curl up in a ball and cry. His outfit drastically contrasts his inviting face though, he’s dressed in dark grey washed jeans and a burnt orange short sleeve that hugs his upper body almost skin-tight, a jacket tied loosely around his waist. The duality of man, you suppose. The slicked back style of his hair on top of literally everything else about him screams one thing. This man looks like a goddamn racer.

As soon as you realize you’ve been gawping at him for a good couple of moments now, you snap your focus up to his eyes, already feeling a blush creeping it’s way across your cheeks.

“You don’t look too bad yourself, officer,” Jisung gives you a quick up and down, meeting your eyes afterwards with a look that can only be described as playfulness.

Oh he just knows he’s hot, doesn’t he? Obviously you’re not going to argue, because he’s right.

“Oh my god, don’t call me that,” You protest, lightly punching his arm in retaliation. You definitely don’t miss the unmistakable feeling of muscle under your fist, but that’s really besides the point. The point is he has you all bothered and shit with that nickname. You’ve never been called ‘officer’ so… affectionately.

“You’re right,” He raises his hands in defense, “my bad, babe.”

A retort shrivels on your tongue. You’re pretty sure you can feel your body temprature go up at least two degrees as Jisung heads back to his car, beckoning you to follow him. His back is turned but you can already imagine that little self-satisfied smirk on his face.

He’s going to be the death of you.

── ࣪˖ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ──

You can feel the weight of your body being pressed back into the seat as Jisung speeds up his pace, making your eyes nearly roll back into your head.

The engine roars in your ears as you watch the speedometer whip from zero to sixty in the span of three point five seconds. You can’t help but have a wide grin plastered on your face. It feels like a good stretch after a day of sitting on the couch, you can’t even remember the last time you’ve just, well, drove. Carefree, without the looming restriction of a speed limit or the stress of swerving after a runaway car. Just you and the road. And Jisung, but that’s a plus.

One of the biggest reasons you had strived to join the police force throughout the beginning of your adolescence is that you just could not get enough of that adrenaline rush that comes from zooming down the highway at outrageous hours of the night, competing with your high school friends to see who’s car could accelerate the quicket, maintain the best speed, sound the coolest. The amount of sleepness nights you had spent installing countless upgrades on your car just to beat your friends in some silly bet over a couple of dollars instilled in you the certainty that this is what you wanted to do for the rest of your life.

You had foolishly thought that becoming an officer would cure that hunger burning in your gut, but it just made it worse. You didn’t realize just how bad it had gotten until just now, the familiar sound of hopping gears and the healthy rev of a well-loved engine resurfaces so many emotions that you had so carefully stowed away when you had all graduated and moved on to university, no longer having the time or bravery to risk getting caught anymore.

You glance over at Jisung in the driver’s seat. He looks so at ease, you can tell this is his home, his element. You wonder if he feels the same emptiness by adhereing to the law that you do. It seems taboo to think that way, given your occupation, but you can’t help it.

Jisung flicks on his blinker to exit the highway, and you give him a look out of the corner of your eye.

“Mind telling me where we’re going?” You inquire as he slows to a stop at the intersection.

“Thought it would be nice to go to dinner, don’t you think so?” He glances down either side of the street to ensure it’s clear as he proposes the offer.

Maybe that empty feeling in your stomach was hunger.

“Yeah, actually, I do think so.”

── ࣪˖ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ──

The restaurant seems strangely empty. A few of the white-clothed tables scattered about the hall are occupied by the quiet bubble of conversation, but other than that the atmosphere is quite still.

Jisung pulls out your chair for you, flamboyantly flipping his hand into a bow as he waits for you to sit. You roll your eyes, badly supressing a smile as you slide into the seat with as much grace as you can manage.

You had both just picked up the menus that had been set in front of you when a low whistle sounds from behind you.

“Who’s the pretty lady, huh, J? Finally found the time to go through that roster of yours?” Your body tenses as someone approaches from the side. You quickly turn your head to get a better view of the newcomer. Oh wow. Was Jisung just friends with hot people in general?

“Ha ha.” Jisung pulls a half-amused face at the man, and gestures to the seat next to him. “This is Changbin. He’s not usually like this, I swear,” Jisung reassures you, leaning back and crossing his arms over his chest as Changbin plops down on the seat over. Despite his bold entrance, he nods politely at you in greeting. It becomes evident that he’s just trying to mess with Jisung, meaning no ill-intent (or even much intrest) towards you. You let your muscles relax.

“Well, were you gonna bring her with us tonight?” Changbin gestures towards you, “you know they always get their panties in a twist when one of us has a girl on our arm—”

“She works in law enforcement, isn’t that cool?” Jisung announces a little too loudly, interrupting Changbin, who immediately snaps his mouth shut.

You don’t miss the way Jisung quirks an eyebrow ever-so-slightly at him, a warning. Huh. Your eyes squint in suspicion. What’s this all about?

“Bring me where?” You question Changbin innocently, pushing past Jisung’s subject change and batting your eyes once or twice, just for good measure.

“Bring you to— well, I mean, It’s a place. Definitely. Yeah. Bring you to a place. Somewhere,” Changbin keeps glancing at Jisung as he speaks, who is currently pinching his nosebridge between two fingers, head tilted towards the ceiling.

Changbin falls silent after that, suddenly very intrested in the condition of his shoelaces. You shift your gaze between the two men as an awkward pause falls over the table.

After a long sigh eminating from Jisung, he leans forwards on the table, hands clasped in front of him. His voice is lowered as he speaks.

“Do you trust me?” His eyes bore into your own, not breaking contact as your mind starts running a mile a minute.

Now, the logical answer you would give to a stranger you hardly know is a resounding ‘of course not,’ but this isn’t just anyone. It’s Jisung. The man who risked his very life to save yours, out of the pure goodness of his heart. You can’t imagine not trusting him, you realize. Because you do, you trust him more than you trust yourself, because he did what you couldn’t that day. Without him, you wouldn’t even be here.

“…Yes, I trust you,” You respond, conviction clear in your voice.

Jisung lets out a breath, once again settling back in his chair.

“Then buckle up babe, ‘cause you’re in for a wild night,” He says with a soft chuckle, just as a loud commotion breaks through the restaurant and crowds of people start to pour in through the front door.

── ࣪˖ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ──

Jisung is a racer. A street racer, to be specific. Very dangerous, and definitely very illegal.

The restaurant turned out to be a meeting point for two rival districts to compete in some sort of tiebreaker race tonight, and it seems like nearly the entire city had come to watch. Jisung had dragged you through the bustling hall off into a corner, where he met up with Changbin and one other racer. You think you heard the name ‘Chan’ but you’re not too sure. It’s quite loud when you have a room filled with excited fans shouting bets this way and that, sure that their district will win and that they’ll walk home with the jackpot.

Jisung, Changbin, and Chan form a three person racing team. They call themselves ‘3racha’. You thought the name was a joke at first, but the laugh caught in your throat when you realized they were being dead serious. Right now the three are huddled together, murmuring over the pre-determined race course, deciding on any last minute strategies.

Right about now, you should be alerting your police team of the highly illegal activity buzzing all around you. Troops would be sent in immediately and the whole event would be shut down, arrests being made left and right.

But, you don’t want that to happen. Not in the slightest.

You know could lose everything over this, your career, your friends, your reputation. None of that matters to you right now. All you want is to see Jisung and his team race.

Not far off, a group that you assume to be the opposing team stares daggers at 3racha, the tallest one of them making eye contact with you. He says something with a scoff, but you can’t make it out just by reading his lips. Whatever it was though, his other two teammates found it hilarious, one doubling over with laughter and the other giving him a jovial smack on the back.

You back away from their prying eyes, accidentally colliding with Jisung in the process. He looks up at you as you send him a quick ‘sorry’, then he shifts his gaze to the still chortling trio. You can see something in his normally soft gaze harden as he straightens up and reaches an arm around your shoulder, gently but firmly pulling you flush to him.

His physical presence overwhelms your senses, suddenly wrapped in a blanket that dulls the rest of the chaos out. You’re positive he can feel your heart racing as he leans in to whisper in your ear,

“I need you to ignore them, okay? They’re just trying to get us bothered, and you’re an easy target for them. Just stick by us. Can you do that for me?” His breath tickles your ear with every syllable he speaks, making your legs weak. You manage a nod and he pulls away from you with a reassuring pat to your shoulder.

Changbin sends a not-so-discreet middle finger their way, which earns both a scowl from the them and a reprimanding tap on the back of the head from Chan.

Frankly, you are a bit overwhelmed. Even though it was just for a second, you miss Jisung’s calming arm around you. Without it, you feel like you are drowning in the unfamiliar voices babbling every which way, every conversation fighting to be understood in your mind at once. Usually, you know exactly how to handle any given situation with a clear mind— it’s part of your job after all— but this? It’s all so foreign to you you don’t even know where to begin.

As soon as the clock strikes midnight, the crowd forms a clear space around both of the teams, allowing room for them to exit the building and enter their vehicles. You scurry after 3racha, feeling quite out of place.

It was to be a relay race. The rules are simple: Three laps around the entire course, each lap assigned to a respective member of each team. Whichever team’s car crosses the finish line first, wins the tiebreaker and takes home the prize. You can tell that mountains of cash are on the line for the boys. Some of the numbers you hear thrown around have your eyes as wide as saucers. If 3racha really is that good, it’s no wonder Jisung is able to afford the kind of car he has.

You’re watching Jisung do a once over of his car, ensuring that everything is safely in order, when he crosses over to you, extending his hand. You furrow your brows, slightly confused, but you take his hand. He smiles, wrapping his fingers tightly around you and squeezing once.

“I want you to ride with me, please?” He says, eyes never leaving your face. You stand in silence for a moment, just soaking in the weight of his hand and the familiarness of his face. The curve of his eyebrow, the slope of his nose, the way his bottom lip always seems to pout out just a little bit, and, oh, those eyes. You feel like you’ve known him for your entire life.

You feel yourself break into a smile.

“Let’s go then,” you squeeze his hand in return.

Jisung’s engine roars to life as him and the other first racer, the tall one’s name is apparently Hyunjin, line up at the designated starting line. 3racha had implored that Jisung go for the first lap, so they would have a healthy leg up on the competition come the second lap, where Changbin would be waiting.

As you wait for the countdown to start your knee bounces up and down, the sickly feeling of intense anticipation eating its way through your stomach.

You feel Jisung’s gaze as he glances over at you, a half grin on his face. What’s he thinking? Your internal question is soon answered as he reaches over and grabs your hand, guiding it to rest on the gearshift.

“10!” A loud voice bellows from a megaphone from outside. The countdown has begun.

Jisung clasps his hand over your own, capturing you in between himself and the vehicle. He’s so warm. Meeting your eyes, he gives you a reassuring nod when he spots your expression, running a thumb along the back of your hand. Now your heart is pounding for a different reason.

“3!” The revving of engines combines with the rush of blood in your ears, the vibrations sending a chill up your spine.

“2!”

“1!”

“Go!”

[lovetaroandtaemin]

NSFW Alphabet: Park Seonghwa

MINORS DNI!!!!!

Pairing: Seonghwa x fem!reader

Genre: Smut

Word Count: N/A

Rating: Explicit

Type: Headcanon list

Warnings: Creampies, breeding kink, dom/sub themes, use of titles ("daddy," "mommy," "sir"), lingerie, mentions of choking. If you think I missed a warning, please let me know!

A/N: I know it's been a long time since my last NSFW alphabet, but none of the full fics I currently have in progress are finished. Since I really wanted to post something this week, I figured this would be a good way to get something out. If there's a specific idol you'd like to see me do a list like this for, feel free to send a request via asks or dms!

Taglist: @xomakara, @heechwe, @shadowkoo, @gyubakeries

List is under the cut.

A - Aftercare

(What they're like after sex)

I think that Seonghwa would be incredibly gentle and do anything and everything that you needed to feel ok after intense sex. He does whatever he can to make you feel safe, comfortable, and loved, and the time spent holding you close when everything is said and done makes him feel the same.

B - Boobs or Ass

(Are they a boobs man or an ass man?)

I fully believe that he would be a boobs man. I don’t know how to explain why, it’s just a vibe that I get from him.

C - Cum

(Anything to do with cum)

I just know that this man LOVES to finish inside you. The breeding kink is strong, of course, but that’s not the only reason why. Still being connected to you when he reaches his high makes him feel closer to you, in a way.

D - Dirty Secret

(Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He tells you that he doesn’t have a preferred title, but I have a very strong feeling that he actually prefers being called “daddy” in bed. Sure, he also likes “mommy” and “sir,” but the desperation that hits him whenever you call him “daddy” is unmatched.

E - Experience

(How experienced are they? Do they know what they're doing?)

I don’t think that he would hook up with a lot of people, so maybe not a whole lot of experience in that regard. But, I think that he would have had a lot of sex in previous relationships, so he definitely knows what he’s doing when it comes to bedroom activities.

F - Favorite Position

(What's their favorite sex position?)

I think that he would enjoy missionary because he loves making eye contact during sex. It just makes the whole thing feel so much more intimate.

G - Goofy

(Are they more serious in the moment, or are they more silly, etc)

Definitely on the more serious side for the most part, but there are definitely occasional silly moments.

H - Hair

(How well-groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Neatly trimmed. He doesn’t like letting hair get out of control.

I - Intimacy

(How are they in the moment, romantic aspect)

So so so so so romantic in bed. In his mind, sex is an expression of love, so there’s no reason for him to be anything but romantic. You never feel unloved during sex with Seonghwa.

J - Jack Off

(Masturbation headcanon)

Doesn’t like to do it unless he’s really desperate. Even then, it’s usually only when he’s away from you, like when he’s on tour. I think he’d greatly prefer sex with a partner to masturbation.

K - Kink

(One or more of their kinks)

Ok so I know I mentioned this in my “Ateez: Dom or Sub and Their Top Kinks” post, but I really think that he would have a thing for lingerie. Something about seeing the person that he loves all dressed up for him drives him wild.

L - Location

(Favorite place to have sex)

Definitely your bed. It’s comfortable, there’s more than enough room for both of you, and he likes not having to worry about getting caught like he did in the more adventurous places that the two of you have chosen for getting busy.

M - Motivation

(What turns them on?)

This man loves being wanted. There are very few things that turn him on more than you being needy for him. Something about you wanting him as badly as he wants you just drives him crazy.

N - No

(Something they won't do)

There’s no way in hell he would ever choke you. He doesn’t judge the people that are into it, but it’s just a tiny bit too intense for him to be comfortable doing it.

O - Oral

(Preference in giving or recieving, skill, etc.)

I think his preference in giving or receiving would depend on the mood he’s in. Sometimes, he just needs to feel your mouth around him, but there are also times that all he wants is to watch you come undone on his tongue. When it comes to skill, I definitely think he’d be good at it.

P - Pace

(Are they fast and rough, slow and sensual, etc.)

For the most part, I think that he would want to take things slow. With that being said, I also think that there are moments where he loses control a little bit and goes a little bit rougher. Never too much, just enough that you know he’s really desperate.

Q - Quickie

(Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

I really don’t think that he’d like quickies all that much, but there are definitely moments that he just needs to feel you, time constraints be damned.

R - Risk

(Is he down to experiment, does he take risks, etc.)

Most of the time, I don’t think he’d really be willing to take risks. I think that there are some situations where he’d be down to experiment, but overall, the concern that whatever it is that he’s curious about would be too much for you tends to win over the desire to try something new.

S - Stamina

(How many rounds can he go for, how long does he last)

I really don’t think that he’d want to do more than one round unless he was really in the mood. However, I do think that he’d be able to last for a bit, and you’re never unsatisfied.

T - Toys

(Do they own toys, do they use them, on a partner or on themselves)

Loves using toys, both on you and on himself. He loves the little extra boost that they give him in the bedroom, and he loves having assistance when it comes to making you fall apart for him.

U - Unfair

(How much they like to tease)

I think that he’d really enjoy teasing, but only in specific situations. Like, I don’t think he’d like public teasing, but when you two are just at home, he loves getting you worked up.

V - Volume

(How loud they are, what sounds they make)

I think he’d make a lot of noise, but it wouldn’t necessarily be loud, if that makes sense. Mostly moans and whines, occasionally growls if he really gets into it.

W - Wild Card

(Random headcanon)

Really wants to try being the submissive party sometimes, but has no idea how to bring it up.

X - X-Ray

(Let's see what's going on in those pants)

In my opinion, Seonghwa has the sort of vibe that you wouldn’t expect him to be huge, but he would be. Never too much, but big enough that you pretty much always need time to adjust when he fucks you.

Y - Yearning

(How high is their sex drive?)

I think that his sex drive would probably fluctuate quite a bit, but for the most part, I think it’d be on the higher side.

Z - Zzzzz

(How quickly they fall asleep afterward)

This man gets so so so sleepy after sex, but he refuses to go to sleep until he’s sure that you’re happy and ok with the things that the two of you did. Once you’ve reassured him that you’re ok, he’s out like a light pretty much immediately.

Thank you for reading! If you enjoyed it, please like and reblog! If you wanna check out my other works, my masterlist is here. If you wanna see what I have in progress, my upcoming works list is here. If you'd like to be tagged in future works, my taglist form is here. If none of the stuff in my masterlist or upcoming works list catches your attention, or there's something else you wanna see (like another NSFW alphabet with a specific idol!), feel free to send a request via asks or dms!

Thank you again for reading this!

[bookie-bookdust]

Helpful (but Aggressive) Guide to the new Hogwarts Legacy PC Mod Update✨

I have been seeing NOTHING BUT COMPLAINING about this damn update and no one actually trying to help each other. So I'm going to do my damn best here to give you a little intro into this new update. Because instead of leaning into the standard toxic consumerism bullshit of fandom, why don't we actually try to be nice to each other?? And the fucking modders who put all this time and effort into making this for us?!?!!?!?!? Special thanks to @anomalyaly because we were up last night trying to figure this out LOL. These screenshots are hers and mine!

PART ONE: Why is my game crashing?

You need to delete your old Nexus ~mod folder from the game files. Throw it in the trash, cut and past it somewhere in your documents, idc. Just get it out of there. The pathway to find it is:

2. Steam senses your bad attitude and don't like it idk. I'm not IT. Turn it off and back on again.

NOTE: Once you start up the game and get it working, you can bring back compatible mods from Nexus. You just need to create a new folder to put them in. It can't be the original one. If your game crashes after that, then you have an incompatible mod in there. You'll have to go down the list until you narrow down which one it is - typically will be a face mod, hair mod, jewelry, or a mod that already exists in the new mod store thing. Yeet it.

PART TWO: I'm not going to teach you how to add the new in-game mods and start the game. I'm not your mom. It's pretty intuitive honestly.

PART THREE: Where the fuck are the clothing mods I just added????

An excellent question, my new charge. You need to go to GladRags to get them. You're going to have to long rest at least three days for them to show up in his store. For me, it took five times lol. This is kind of annoying, but it needs to be immersive to the game I guess so oh well. I don't think we'll die from it.

See all those red exclamation points? That was my fault. I loaded a wizard clothing mod into a witch save. So if you see that, you loaded something you shouldn't have.

PART FOUR: HOW DO I CHANGE MY UGLY ASS HAIR?

Easy peasy lemon squeezy. You're going to go to that hairstyle lady in Hogsmeade I'm too lazy to look up the name of. That bitch charges you for the new hairstyles but you can download unlimited money cheats so whatever.

Don't mind my face lol. I was having a BP makeup glitch LOL

PART THIRTY-SEVEN: How do I change my makeup?

This part sucks. RIGHT NOW as of 1/31/2025, you have to be in the main character design screen at the beginning of the damn game. BUT BUT BUT - if you mod back in the BP character editor, you can do it anywhere. My hope is a new mod will replace this so the game works more smoothly.

Those white spaces? They're the new in-game mods for hair and makeup. Well, most of them. I think some are just random blank spaces lol.

Part Six: Where are my unlocked spells and unlimited plants and shit?

Two reasons they're not showing up:

If you just added this mod and you load your game in the middle of the mission, you need to finish the mission first.

You probably have something incompatible (a nexus mod) that isn't playing nice. Yeet it.

After getting everything squared away, I look fucking great. You are not doomed to a potato face🥔. I FUCKING PROMISE YOU ON SOLOMON'S LIFE.

Truly guys, once you work out the kinks in this update, it's really. fucking. nice.

Before I reinstalled the nexus mods, the game was running so smoothly and the graphics were beautiful. I loaded in 20 mods all at once, and the game handled them just fine. After reloading the nexus mods it was a bit clunky, but of course it would be.

I know change is scary. Also for those who spent time creating/commissioning mods that are no longer compatible, they have the biggest right to be freaking out. BUT BUT BUT we all fucking know the old mods AND SO MANY MORE will be back soon. People are working their asses off in the background converting things right now.

I want to put some things into perspective for you:

We have not had a real update in two years (no, photo mode doesn't count). This is literally the best kind of update we could ever ask for. We are not dependent on the devs for updates with this. In the launch event they were speaking as if you can create your own quests; there are audio mods....think about it guys. Endless protentional. (The only things that aren't going to make it are if you have weird ass like engorgio penis mods because there's no way they're approving those for public use hahahaha)

The devs reached out to people in the community to ask for feedback and to collaborate. THEY CARE ABOUT THE FANDOM. Consider what that may mean for the sequel??? We might not be forced to stomach Hogwarts Legacy 2: Dumbledore's Jorts. They're listening (but they're not going to listen if you're fucking rude and stupid).

You guys shitting on this update very vocally here, on twitter, and on tiktok are forgetting that people in your community helped create it and can SEE YOU. STOP IT. Whine in private!!!!!! Also because I knowww I have to specify because someone is going to take everything personally, I don't mean posts making funny jokes about the updates and just being like ahhhh wtf is going on I'm so lost and whatnot. Like please guys, read the room. I'm referring to nasty comments.

So yes, I'm here with a positive review of the update, and an insanely aggressive reminder to calm the fuck down and go touch some grass. The old mods will be back soon. This update makes using them so much easier. Also, THE POOR CONSOLE PLAYERS DON'T EVEN HAVE ANYTHING YET SOOOOOOOO

I WILL NOT BE TAKING ANY QUESTIONS OR CRITICISM SO STFU. THANKS FOR READING THIS LONG ASS POST IF YOU'RE STILL HERE. OKAAAY BYEEeeEE.

[autisticsupervillain]

FTF Monthly Matchups!

Ranking: The Beta Trolls from weakest to strongest!

It took me.... a long time to decide how I was going to rank this. I'm going to be ranking each of the Beta Trolls based off of how powerful they are at their strongest. So for characters with multiple forms, that would be whatever their strongest version is. God-Tier Aradia, Ancestral Awakening Vriska, etc. I will usually discuss how strong I think their weaker iterations are when I get to them anyways.

I will be analyzing their Alpha Timeline counterparts specifically, as while we see a lot of doomed timeline counterparts that have reached God-Tier, we aren't really given any context to measure their abilities off of. I will also be completely ignoring feats featured in non-canon works. No Homestuck^2, no Epilogues, no Pesterquest.

Finally, no Sprites. I'll be restricting this to just the Base Beta Trolls. Sprites are fusions between multiple characters and if you want to go down that road, Lord English is a fusion involving Gamzee and Equius, so......

The criteria is as follows. The characters ranked highest are those who could most consistently defeat everyone ranked below them in a one-on-one fight with no outside interference. This does not necessitate that they can kill everyone ranked below them. If character A can incapacitate Character B but has no way to finish them off, that still counts as a win. This is to keep the immortal characters from winning by default against everyone who can't kill them. Not that they strictly need that boon to rank fairly high regardless.

With all that out of the way, let's begin.

12. Karkat Vantas

Yeah, you all probably knew this was coming. Despite being one of the best characters by a mile, there's just nowhere that the crabby friendleader can reliably place on this list higher than dead last.

Now, in his defense, Karkat's a very strong fighter in his own right. Despite being an ordinary mortal for the entire story, Karkat survives the longest out of nearly anyone in the entire main cast without dying once, only finally getting put down in Game Over by Jane and Gamzee respectively. That's nothing to sneeze at. He's a survivor for sure, but his strengths simply aren't suited to a one on one fight.

Positives first, Karkat's ability to unify his team was instrumental in ensuring they all survived long enough to beat the game, successfully keeping them all from killing each other even in dire circumstances until the dire straights hit critical mass. He also has a unique counter to probability manipulation. His luck is so terrible that it is able to counter out an opponent's good luck abilities, allowing him to fight opponents like Clover who are literally untouchable due to their sheer superhuman luck.

Besides that.... he doesn't have much. A lot of Karkat's best arguable showings come from things his friends would already having going for them by default. Surviving crash landing to Alternia in a meteor? Battling against the armies of Derse? Fighting against the Black King? All things other members of his team participated in to degrees to esceed him.

Karkat is a Blood Player. He's built to maintain friendships. His most impressive showings are him talking people down from fighting him by befriending them. But since Karkat already is/was friends with most of these people to begin with.... that doesn't really help him here. If one of your most notable skills combat wise is how much your luck sucks.... that's not a good look.

Given all the shit he's gone through, Karkat is genuinely a good fighter in his own right. Just not when compared to everyone else on his contacts list.

Maybe Karkat can just seduce them. Everyone loves flirting with this little shit.

11. Tavros Nitram

You might be surprised that Tav isn't in last place here, but I think this toreador has more going for him than meets the eye.

I've already covered Tavros vs Karkat as a matchup in more detail in its own post, so I'll be brief here. While Karkat is remarkably dexterous and nimble in his own right, he doesn't have a means of countering actual flight, which Tavros has with his rocket wheelchair. Moreover, Tavros has slightly more combat experience owing to his time spent in Fatal Live Action Roleplay. It's just like normal LARPing, but the Players actually try and kill each other. Which is doubly humiliating for Karkat because Tavros can say "I'm a better fighter than you because I'm a LARPer" and technically be right.

But, the thing most heavily carrying Tavros here are his animal communion powers. This telepathic ability allows him to communicate with and control animals and similar creatures, even if they are entire universes away. This ability expands to First Guardians, nigh-omnipotent, reality warping gods, so long as they are also animals in some way.

If Tavros uses this ability to its full extent, he has the potential to beat characters much higher up on this list. The issue is he's not very often going to be in a scenario where he can make the most of it and, even if he is, calling on a First Guardian would be outside help. Besides, it's pretty out of character for him to make a God wish you out of existence.

All that said, it's still pretty funny that Tavros technically has the means to likely solo your favorite universe so long as Bec is lying around somewhere. And even without that, his ability to fly away and sic the whole animal kingdom on you makes him an opponent you'd be loathed to underestimate no matter how you look at it.

10. Nepeta Leijon

Nepeta earns her spot on the list by being demonstratably much stronger and more skilled than either Karkat or Tavros. Unlike those two, who are either relatively bad at or actively dislike having to fight anyone, Nepeta is a proud Apex Predator. She's a huntress who fights the horrible beasts of Alternia for fun and is able to sleep through the vivid nightmares that Trolls get when they try to sleep without sopor slime simply because she views them as thrilling memories of the hunt. Certainly more impressive than glorified deadly LARPing.

Key difference being Tavros is such a sweetheart that he hates fighting, while Nepeta is a sweetheart who happens to deeply love fighting. While Nepeta can't fly, her experience in fighting deadly beasts should make her more than capable of slicing through almost any animal Tavros could through at her, reducing his flight to a stall tactic that drags out the fight more than anything else. Her biggest problem would likely be hesitating to hurt Karkat due to her crush on him.... which would be minor in comparison to his reluctance to hurt her because of his survivor's guilt over her death, so it all balances out.

Notably, she's one of the few characters we see actually being able to stagger her moirail Equius, even knocking him off his feet at one point. Given Equius's complete inability to control his own strength and the sheer ridiculousness of his own feats, that's impressive all on its own. Far moreso than anything Karkat or Tavros could manage.

Nepeta is only held back from placing any higher by her relative lack of screentime compared to everyone else. The fact that Gamzee was able to snap her wrist and kill her offscreen without much effort doesn't help. But for all her shortcomings, Nepeta called herself a mighty huntress for a reason.

9. Equius Zahhak

Here's someone I was going to place a lot higher.

The second half of the Meowrails duo is frequently hyped up as being one of the strongest members on the team and for good reason. This is the same guy who can bend and shape metal bear handed, punch the heads off of giant monsters with ease, and jump into the stratosphere in a single bound. He's even survived getting beaten down by Aradiabot. The same kind of beating that killed Pre God Tier Vriska outright.

Equius combines his freakish strength with a genius technical mind, frequently building and rebuilding training robots for him to spar with. He's the genius the built Aradiabot's body to house Aradia's soul, after all.

Needless to say, he'd handle Karkat and Tavros simultaneously with ease. The question isn't if Equius can beat them, it's if he'd kill them accidentally, as Equius notoriously can't control his strength. Equius frequently breaks people's bones just by touching them and can't properly wield a bow because he accidentally snaps it in half.

As a hoghblood much farther up on the hemopectrum than any of there characters prior, Equius has a lifespan hundreds, if not thousands of years longer than a normal human and he's incredible resistant to psychic influence.

Resistant, but not immune. When Gamzee first prioritized Equius as a target in his rampage, his psychically influenced his mind to make him unwilling to fight back because he knew Equius's strength would provide an issue. Given what Gamzee himself is capable of himself, the fact that he rated Equius highly enough to be cautious in dealing with him speaks highly to the threat Equius can pose.

8. Feferi Piexes

The heiress to troll kind and the future would be Empress, what Feferi lacks in direct feats and screentime, she more than makes up for in scaling. She can haul around whale carcasses under the ocean with ease and replicate Equius's feat of souring high into the atmosphere, hinting that they should be at least at a comparable level. Even the Condescension herself seem to consider her as a viable potential threat to her in line for the throne, as she would've killed Feferi herself by now if Gl'bgolyb wasn't actively protecting her. That's far more billing than Equius ever got. Equius is freakishly strong by the standards of his caste, but the Condescension is one of the strongest of all trolls period.

As the highest troll on the Hemospectrum, Feferi is completely immune to all forms of psychic influence, including those from the Horrorterrors. Gl'bgolyb, whose shouts can drive all of troll kind to extinction across the galaxy, has no negative effect on Feferi. Furthermore, she's biologically immortal. Just like her ancestor before her, she'll live for centuries and still be in her prime. Or rather, she would have if she wasn't cut down before her time.

Luckily, her connection to the Horrorterrors allows her to help her friends even in death, convincing them to build an afterlife for her friends so they don't cease to exist after death.

In a straight fight, I favor her over Equius due to her more impressive accolades and due to the fact that she can actually control her iwn strength. Equius literally can't even use his weapon properly because of his. Even in the event that the caste worshipping Equius would be willing to give his all in a fight with the Heiress, I see Feferi taking it more times than not.

7. Sollux Captor

Sollux is where things really begin ramping up in the feats department. Sollux is where a vast majority of the good feats for the mid-tiers comes from. As the Descendant of the Psiioniic, the most powerful telekinetic in Alternian history, Sollux has inherited an incredible amount of power. The same power that could move spaceships across entire galaxies in hours is his to command.

Sollux can push a meteor the size of a moon into the Furthest Ring at speeds bordering on light. Given the sheer weight of the moon, that would generate kinetic energy equivalent to 0.8 Foe. Nearly as much energy as a supernova!

He can reach across entire universes with this sheer telekinetic might, capable of destroying machines that are in another universe entirely or deflecting meteors that orbit around the Incipisphere, which is roughly 45 million times larger than the universe, traveling at 6 quinvigintillion times light speed.

Source:

In other words, these greasy hacker could more than likely solo most of your favorite universes just off stats alone. To compare to his fellows, Sollux has the unique ability to hear the words of the soon to be dead and he's treated as one of the most freakishly powerful characters on the team in general. He stalemated Eridan during their clash in the game and he's the only member of the team to survive a blast from Eridan's wand during Murderstuck. This puts him directly above Feferi, who was taken out in one hit. Not to mention his ability to telekinetically fly away and spam eye lasers from a distance would easily allow him to snipe Equius and Feferi from a distance before either could do anything to close the gap.

Noteworthy, though is the fact that this blow did still blind him and knock him out. The only reason he survived was because Eridan assumed he was already dead. Which should indicate pretty well who exactly is going to rank right above him.

6. Eridan Ampora

The genocidal seadweller prince arrives to close out the middle half of this ranking. Despite his ambitions of bringing about doomsday for everyone without gills, Eridan does not live up to his own grandeur. Though he's still one of the most dangerous people Alternia has to offer regardless.

Eridan proudly sports the laser canon known as Ahab's Crosshairs, a powerful beam weapon capable of punching holes in building sized monsters and matching blasts with Sollux Captor pound for pound. As the one tasked with killing Lusi to feed Gl'bgolyb, he has plenty of experience using it, even managing to slaughter an entire planet full of angels with it. His real ace in the hole, however, is his wand.

Despite being just a regular stick, Eridan's latent Hope powers empower this tool into a genuine magical artifact, completely capable of making mincemeat out of the rest of his team. He was able to one shot Sollux, Feferi, and Kanaya in quick succession and would've posed a genuine threat to both Vriska and Gamzee afterwards if he'd gotten that far.

Unfortunately, he's kept from placing any higher by his limitations. He's a massive glass cannon without his two major weapons, to the point that he'd likely place far lower on this list if he didn't have them, and he's not nearly as smart as he thinks he is.

Slaughtering all the Angels in his path was something he convinced himself he had to do out of paranoia, turning all of them permanently aggressive against him when they would've been completely friendly otherwise. Not to mention that, before the game, he got curb stomped by Vriska so many times that she got bored of his antics and left him. He makes it to this spot more despite himself than anything, as I consider a few who came before him to be much better at actually fighting.

Even Sollux vs Eridan is a bit more up in the air than it seems. If you throw current Sollux with all the experiences he's had throughout Homestuck into that same situation and he could easily just yank the weapons out of Eridan's hands. But that doesn't change the fact that, in a death match where both were at their best in story, Eridan still explicitly won.

5. Kanaya Maryam

Darling Kanaya brings us into the top five. This chainsaw wielding, zombie fighting fashionesta was a force to be reckoned with already, but upon becoming an undead Rainbow Drinker, she became a one woman army.

Upon resurrecting, the very first thing she did was interrupt the impending three way brawl between Vriska, Gamzee, and Eridan by solidly dunking on all three of them. She decked Vriska hard enough to send her flying, kicked Gamzee in the dick so hard he went soaring into the abyss, and snapped Eridan's wand in half like a twig before carving him clean in half.

As an immortal undead of the day, Kanaya is immune to otherwise lethal sunlight of Alternia and is immortal, continuing on even despite missing her stomach cavity completely. She long as she feeds some multicolored blood, she'll keep going even through otherwise lethal injuries.

I do think a good argument could be made for placing her even higher on this list given the threat she poses to Gamzee. Every hit she's ever landed on the clown has been absolutely devastating. But, there are a few things that hold her back from this in my opinion.

Firstly, we don't really know how the first encounter would've played out had the fight continued. Despite the truly devastating groin attack, Gamzee got right back up and both were raring up ready to continue into round two before Karkat intervened. Secondly, Gamzee still wasn't dead after Kanaya chainsawed him in Game Over. There's no Dead text we see whenever a troll dies, even though Karkat gets that treatment from dying in the lava moments earlier. As such, Kanaya gets vaporized by the Condescension before the fight can continue.

This means that, despite these two clearly being in the same league, they've never really gotten to fight on even ground before. And in that circumstance.... I'd have to favor Gamzee slightly.

Hear me out. While Kanaya is entirely capable of chainsawing him up and leaving him incapacitated like in Game Over, she has no counter against Gamzee’s mind manipulation. Whenever Gamzee has to fight someone who possesses an actual threat to him, he resorts to either mind manipulation or emotional manipulation. See Equius and Terezi for example. And given their history, Gamzee would absolutely see her as a massive threat. So, more likely than not, he'd mind control her in a similar vein to Equius in order to avoid that issue entirely.

That said, she's still and absolutely massive threat to him and the amount of characters who can actually force Gamzee to take them that seriously are few and far between.

4. Vriska Serket

Vriska Serket. The myth, the 8itch, the legend has climbed her way to the top, much to no one's suprise. I agonized a lot over where I wanted to order these next three characters and it might suprise a lot of people to see her put this low relatively speaking. But, rest assured, the Spider Pirate Queen will be getting her dues.

Vriska is one of the most experienced, versatile, and ruthless characters on this entire list. With a body count in the thousands before the story even starts, Vriska is cruel, brutal, and vindictive when provoked, be that mind controlling you to jump off a cliff or mind controlling your boyfriend to vaporize you utterly. As a Thief of Light, Vriska has a knack for lore finding and a tendency for luck. Her passive ability to steal and manipulate luck to her favor amplifies her fighting style, allowing her to use her dicekind for anything from putting you to sleep to decapitating you with a guillotine. Her going God-Tier only amplifies this further while giving her a healthy dose of immortality.

As a literally God, Vriska gains the ability to fly and is gifted with complete immortality. So long as she doesn't die in a way the game deems heroic or just, Vriska will be resurrected from virtually any kind of death. Some God-Tiers have resurrected even as reality was collapsing about their heads even.

But, even this is far from Vriska's full strength. If she so chooses, she could land a perfect roll with her dice and tao into her Ancestral Awakening form. With this strength, she can even match the power of a First Guardian infused Bec Noir, who could singlehandedly destroy universe.

Of note, universes in Homestuck are in all actuality composed of infinite timelines and infinite iterations of themselves, making them functionally infinite multiverses. And while Vriska ultimately died in the timeline this fight happened in, she went down as an even match against Jack.

The only thing keeping her from placing any higher on this list is her own shortcomings and weaknesses. Namely, her massive ego, which singlehandedly got all of her friends killed when she went to battle Bec Noir. For all of her claims of having "all the irons in the fire" her idea of a plan is usually to just use her powers to cheat. Certainly not a bad strategy, her body count speaks for itself, but Terezi is moreso the tactician of their duo than her. Vriska is not the master manipulator she fancies herself as and her deep seated vulnerability has been used against her on occasion.

Such as when, uh.... she was groomed into a romantic relationship by Meenah. Meenah was 19... and Vriska was 13. That's a college student and a middle schooler...

Vriska refuses to acknowledge this more vulnerable part of herself even exists most of the time, frequently grappling with the guilt and lack their of that she feels for her actions. Truth be told, she struggles to admit to herself that she doesn't actually want to be a bloodthirsty killer like her glorious ancestor. And against the following two in particular, that's a very glaring vulnerability to have.

3. Gamzee Makara

You can't the clown down. Or out of the top 3 for that matter.

It suprised me to consider that Gamzee could be considered to be in the same weight class as Ancestral Awakening Vriska, but it was while researching these characters again that I discovered something interesting. Recall Karkat's retelling of the fight against the Black King. Specifically, the part where he notes that Gamzee did more damage to the King in one attack than everyone else on the team could manage at the time.

Including Vriska, who we know for a fact used her Ancestral Awakening ability during that fight.

Combine this with the fact that Gamzee has canonically soloed everyone else on this kist by himself in at least one alternate timeline and it's safe to say we know why he ranked this high.

The biggest issue with ranking Gamzee is that he cannot die. Ever.

There is not a single timeline in the Homestuck multiverse where Gamzee Makara has ever died. No one on this list can kill him.

He's survived getting sucked into a planet sized black hole, endured a brutal beatdown from Caliborn, who himself tanked a solar system sized black hole, and has been craved clean in half and melted in lava. It did not kill him. Gamzee has literally plot armor ensuring he cannot die.

This plays nicely into his Rage powers, ensuring he gets stronger the angrier he gets. Sooner or later, he will be strong enough to kill you in turn as you fail to kill him.

Gamzee combines all of this with a frightfully efficient tactical mind. He's very good at using his mind powers in subtle ways to get his opponent to do what he wants. Convincing Terezi of Vriska's guilt while building up to their confrontation, negating Equius to keep him from fighting back, and influencing John's entire life throughout his childhood with nightmares, having him vandalize his own room in ways he couldn't even perceive.

Gamzee uses this to be as emotionally devastating to his foes as possible, playing on Terezi's grief following her killing of Vriska to trap her in an abusive relationship and keep her ineffectual, even leveraging their relationship at the crucial moment of the Game Over timeline to reduce her to tears.... before suplexing her through a bridge.

Combine this emotional ruthlessness with Vriska's weaknesses discussed above. Vriska is not a match for Gamzee in a battle of telepathy. While Vriska can at best put humans to sleep, Gamzee can manipulate them for their entire childhoods without them ever knowing. This is amplified by Gamzee’s telepathy specifically targeting emotional vulnerabilities like traumas and fears, as Vriska has a basket full of those that she refuses to acknowledge. Simply put, the immortal clown is almost perfectly equipped to take her down.

This may seem strange. Vriska is usually identified as a key component in keeping the Retcon timeline on track and keeping Gamzee from being a legitimate threat, right?

Well, the credit there can go moreso to our next contender....

2. Terezi Pyrope

Despite being the only ordinary mortal remaining on the front lines by the time of Act 7, Terezi is by far one of the most capable in the entire cast.

Above all, Terezi arguably is the best strategist of anyone here. For as much as Karkat postured about being the leader, Terezi and Aradia were really the ones calling the shots tactically. Terezi's plans can frequently span entire timelines and all of them almost always go up her way. Exploiting the Queen's hatred of frogs to keep her from transforming, manipulating John to his death so that Dave could travel back to become Davesprite, giving John detailed instructions on how to undo the Game Over timeline, and even manipulating the nigh-omniscient Doc Scratch into doing her dirty work for her to get back Vriska. Terezi is a consumate Magnificent Bastard and I have read her book.

For as much as Gamzee emotionally devastated her throughout Act 6, Terezi shows full well why he had to focus that much attention on keeping her in check. Because without the grief of personally murdering her best friend/worst enemy/Scourge Sister/girlfriend to save everyone else, Gamzee cannot take Terezi in a straight up fight. She hog ties him down as soon as she catches wind of what's going on together she and Vriska make sure he never sees the outside of a fridge for the next 3 years.

Between shutting Gamzee down completely, helping fight the Condescension on the front lines, and having knocking John on his ass while he was empowered by the Treasure, Terezi really is Hussie's favorite, isn't she? For as much crap as Gamzee and Vriska get for getting away with things they absolutely shouldn't have, Terezi is an ordinary mortal boxing against Gods.

Abilities wise, Terezi's most notable aspects are her precognition, which she uses for maximum effectiveness in her sprawling plans, and her superhuman sense of smell and taste, making up for her blindness by smelling the color of the blood in your veins and tasting your appearance. Not as impressive as some Abilities on here to be sure, but her established scaling alone would give her plenty of ways to muscle through all the competition that came before her.

But, for as much as I hesitated for the prefinal slots, there was only ever one choice for top spot....

1. Aradia Megido

Aradia is the strongest troll in Homestuck and it frankly isn't close.

Even as Aradiabot, she's admitted she could snap God-Tier Vriska's neck with a twitch. As an actual time goddess herself now, Vriska wouldn't stand a chance.

The first thing Aradia did upon being reborn a God-Tier was freeze Bec Noir in time, before making her escape by traveling through the portal in his body in a split second before he could react. This is despite the fact that Bec Noir can travel in the Furthest Ring. Where time does not exist.

Aradia froze time on someone who can move faster than time and then escaped before he could react.

Not only that, but Aradia can freely summon time clones of herself from other points in time, allowing her to overwhelm her enemies with an endless army of herself. These two abilities alone would freely allow her to just.... shut down anyone lower than her on the list. Stop time and dog pile. Easy. Aradia backs this up with tactical ingenuity, having been pulling the strings on her team the entire time to keeping them from dooming the timeline and prevent them from entering no win scenarios. Every situation that someone on this list has been in is a scenario she's examined or been through to make sure nothing goes wrong. She's really only rivaled in the planning department by Terezi.

But, finally, she's the only one on this list who could harm Lord English himself. The invincible demon who was destoying the entire Homestuck cosmology. Not just harming him, but riding him like helpless tamed bull with her whip.

Next to everyone else.... Aradia is just in a league of her own.

[crownofgildedlilies]

great expectations! - 2, happy birthday!

prev. | current | next | series list | character intros

You've been a regular at Freddie's since it was legal for you to drink, and if you were being honest, a little before then, too.

The bar is nothing special and a little out of your way, but you've made some of your favorite memories there. It's where you and Kuroo finally wore down Tsukki enough so that he would sign the lease with everyone, where you celebrated every birthday and finished project to the fullest extent you deserved.

You'd been sitting at the bar, in the same spot you were currently rooted to, when you found out that you had been chosen as the next captain.

You don't think Kuroo is watching out for you from the booth like he claimed he would while you elbowed your way to the bar, but you don't blame him. He's got Tsukki trapped in a conversation the blond has no interest in, and you know that any distraction on Kuroo's part will mean Tsukki can make his escape.

It's far more packed than you had thought it would be, especially for a place like Freddie's. It's not a place that particularly draws crowds, but there's an exceeding amount of university students filtering in through the doors. You can't help but feel a bubble of immature annoyance that so many others are taking up space at your favorite place.

"I guess I have to do the gentlemanly thing and buy you a drink for your birthday, don't I, pretty?"

Like nails on a chalkboard, the voice of Tooru Oikawa cuts through tranquility of your night out. You're wedged against the counter in an attempt to try and get the overworked and understaffed bartender's attention, and Oikawa is only a few short inches away. He's not touching you, or blocking off your escape into the crowd, and those small details are the only reasons why your fight or flight instincts don't kick in.

You manually choose fight, face twisting into a glare that met his boyish smirk head on. When it was clear he was undeterred, you turned fully towards the bar and kept your shoulder between your body and his chest.

You were really determined to get your drink.

"Lucky that we ran into each other, don't you think?" He tries again, and in your effort to keep from looking at him, your attention snags on a group of girls circled around a high top table. You think you might have a lecture with one of them, but all you really focus on is the way their focus is on the man standing beside you.

"So you're the reason for the crowd, aren't you?" You roll your eyes without looking at him and lean forwards against the counter, hoping that it helps the bartender see you waiting oh so patiently.

"The only ones who knew I was coming here tonight were my friends," He reasons, but you can hear the smugness in his voice, so you don't really believe the way his hands raise slightly in innocence. "I can't help it if the people love me."

"You're insufferable, you know that?" You huff, finally giving up your valiant effort to ignore him for as long as humanly possibly. His grin is wide when you make eye contact, and you swear you see something like a flush high on his cheeks while you glare up at him.

"Iwa's told me that, but I think you two are just mean." He exaggerates a pout, then gestures casually to the bartender for two more of the bottle he has clutched in his hand.

You really do hate Oikawa, because in seconds he's gotten fresh drinks when you've been waiting for nearly ten minutes. Not to mention, the girls that are staring holes into the back of your head.

He tries to press one of the bottles into your hands, but you refuse, drawing the line at actually letting him buy you a drink. It doesn't matter that what he ordered sounds decent; it's principle.

Under no circumstances whatsoever can you let Tooru Oikawa buy you a drink. It's against all known laws of nature.

"Uh, no thanks." Your words might seem polite, but they're dripping with attitude you can't seem to find it in you to care about. You know if Kiyoko had overheard you, she would have called you out for being rude, but unfortunately, you're left alone with public enemy number one.

"C'mon, it's your birthday! Live a little." He's teasing, and if it had come from anyone else but him, you would've already conceded.

"Why don't you give it to one of your fan club members over there? I bet they'd simply die if you bought them a drink." You nod your head in the direction of the girls glaring at you, and to Oikawa's credit, he doesn't even glance their way. You'd be lying if you said it didn't surprise you, what with the reputation he has for being a womanizer.

"I want to buy you a drink. On your birthday." His voice is calm and steady, tone dipped a bit lower than his usual easy lilt. You wish he'd look away from you, but you don't think he's glanced anywhere else but you since the moment he approached, save for ordering the drinks. "I don't really care about anyone else who wants my attention."

You blame the absurdness of his statement on your next actions.

As if put under a spell—some horrid concoction of his overwhelming eye contact, the proximity of his large frame, the sound of his voice, and the drinks you'd already consumed—you pull the bottle from his hand and take a deep, long sip without looking away from him.

Your heart is racing. Why is your heart racing?

"Good fucking night, Oikawa," You murmur, abandoning your post at the bar before he could respond and using the influx of bodies in the space to your advantage. You dive into the crowd to avoid his response, the consequences of your actions, and the unfamiliar buzz humming down to your very fingertips.

You think you might know the cause, but's just too unbelievable. You cram it down internally, which is totally the healthy thing to do.

You take a detour back to the booth to drop the bottle in front of Tsukki before muttering some lame excuse you're not even sure you heard clearly and bolting towards the back of the bar. The line to the bathroom is mercifully short, and soon enough you're standing in front of the mirror and cursing the flush in your face.

You really hate Tooru Oikaw.a

extras!

yn is still plotting tsukki's demise after his "you sound like oikawa comment" but kuroo convinced her to put it on hold so they can all go out. kiyoko is still adamant that it was funny and yn can't stay mad at her

when yn got the notification that oikawa liked her story, she stared at it for like five minutes in shock at his audacity. not once did she consider responding

oikawa obsesses over everything yn posts, but never had been brave enough to message until then. he's too used to people pursuing him

at the bar, oikawa took almost a full hour to talk to yn even though he saw her within thirty seconds of arriving

Hinata and Bokuto always disappear together whenever they go out together. It's a problem. the only reason anyone knew where they went was because kiyoko caught them leaving

taglist: 2/50

@loveyislost @vi0let-writes

[sillier-than-thou]

I’m not nearly good enough at drawing to be able to make animatics, but the editor in me keeps coming up with ideas for tma animatics and I need to get some of them out of my system, so I made a list (spoilers for tma obviously):

•Mikaele Salesa in season 5 to Private Life by Oingo Boingo. “Here in my humble room at night / I often wonder what goes on out there / what makes them run so scared. / I often stare at the people passing by / but they can’t see me through my window shades. / Just like I’m not even there!”

•Robert Smirke to Man-Made Object by Lemon Demon. “I have a vision of a man-made object / I have the money, I have the means / I have the strangest dreams!”

•Michael the Distortion to The Afternoon by Lemon Demon. “In the attic of this house / on the wall behind a propped up couch / is a door that somehow leads into / the basement of this house??”

•Jan Kilbride in MAG 106 to Falling Up by Will Wood. “Here comes the sun, am I falling up? /FAAALLING UUUUUUUUUP! / Here comes the sun, am I falling up? / FAAALLING UUUUUUUUUP! / Here comes the sun, am I falling up?” (Because in his statement he literally goes “I could feel myself falling up” lmao)

•Dr. David in MAG 177 to A Mask of My Own Face by Lemon Demon. “At all the people hissing, knowing I’m the one they hate / and at the big finale I would tear my face away / and smile as they grip their own and try to do the same!”

•Jonathan Sims and Martin Blackwood in season 5 to Aurora Borealis by Lemon Demon. “So, let’s take the night off! / Be joyful and joyously enjoy the moonrise / and let it destroy us. / See, it’s okay / as long as we believe we’ll be okay / as if anything could go wrong on Christmas Eve! / Okay, you know I’m glad you’re here / so I can show you this before I disappear. / Is this the first time that you’ve ever seen Aurora Borealis crush mankind? / A flashlight underneath my chin / a pretty winter night / your hand in mine.”

•Elias Bouchard talking to Jon Sims in season 3 to BlackBoxWarrior by Will Wood. “You’ve lost your mind and almost lost your life before / so you’ll be fine! / For what? For what? For what it’s worth / if it was going to kill you, boy it would have by now! / For what? For what? For what it’s worth / there’s no more looking back, and why would you want to look back? / I mean, it’s no good looking back, so time to look forward now! / For what? For what? For what it’s worth / if they were going to get you boy, they would have by now! / For what? For what? For what it’s worth / there’s no more looking back, it’s looking up or looking doooooooown!”

•Jonah Magnus throughout his entire existence (but especially season 5) plus Jon killing him in MAG 200 to No One Lives Forever by Oingo Boingo. “Let’s have a party, there’s a full moon eye in the sky / it’s the hour age of the wolf beholding, and I don’t wanna die! / I’m so happy, dancing while the grim reaper / cuts, cuts, cuts, but he can’t get me! / I’m as clever as can be, and I’m very quick / but don’t forget we’ve only got so many tricks. / No one lives forever!”

•Jonathan Sims (especially in season 4 and 5) to Laplace’s Angel by Will Wood. “We’ve all got evidence of innocence, it’s ‘everything’s coincidence’. / The difference twixt fate and free will is whether you’re singing / Ooh, could you take a look at me? / Am I bad, am I bad, am I bad, am I really that bad? / And now we’re singing, ooh / whatever you think of me / if you were in my shoes / you’d walk the same damn miles I do!”

•The Archivist™️ in season 5 to The Passenger by Siouxsie and The Banshees. “Oh, the passenger. / Oh, how he rides! / Oh, the passenger. / He rides and rides! / He looks through his window. / What does he see? / He sees the sign and hollow sky / he sees the stars come out tonight / he sees the city’s ripped backsides / he sees the winding ocean drive. / And everything was made for you and me! / All of it was made for you and me! / ‘Cause it just belongs to you and me! / So let’s take a ride and see what’s mine!”

•Jonathan Sims in season 3 and 4 to Cotard’s Solution by Will Wood and The Tapeworms. “Cry my name, remind my brain of my identity! / I’m not gonna listen, I’m not my volition / I’m sha na na na na na free-will! / Am I to blame for riding this train right by my destiny? / Ah, prove I can crack, ah, loose from the track, ah! / Sha na na na na na free-will!”

So, if anyone on here likes to make animatics, could these ideas maybe possibly perhaps hypothetically be fun to do? :333 I’m probably going to add way more songs to this as time goes on!

[mommyslittlebird]

It Felt Like Coming Home

WandaNat x Reader

Summary: After being strong for so long, the veil starts to slip.

CW: Dissociation, Crying, Hurt/Comfort

Word Count: 2.2k

A/N: Gang, I don't know how long this slow burn is gonna last. I might have to adjust to a medium paced burn, cause I apparently don't know how to write a blossoming relationship in a compelling way. For that reason, this one is kinda short.

Chapter 3 of A Room of Your Own

The next morning you found yourself awake earlier than usual. Again. You had a habit of not sleeping well when adjusting to new environments. So you once again made your way to the kitchen before sunrise, where you once again found Wanda leaned up against the counter in the same silk robe from yesterday.

She smiled over her coffee mug when she saw you. “Good morning! Can I make you a cup of coffee?”

You nodded, taking a seat on a stool at the island. 

“Same as yesterday? With my creamer?” 

“Yes please,” you yawned. 

She slid the mug across the island and leaned forward against the counter. “Did you sleep okay?”

You took a sip of coffee and nodded. You hadn’t really slept okay, but you didn’t have any desire to share that with Wanda. She was clearly trying very hard to make you comfortable. She wasn’t buying it. There was clearly something under the surface that didn’t escape her notice. She let the silence sit for a long moment, hoping you would say something. There was a warm glimmer in her green eyes urging you to speak up. You looked down into your mug, idly tapping the mug with your pointer finger. 

Realizing you were going to need more prompting, Wanda spoke again. “How are you feeling? About everything.”

You shrugged, not looking back up at her. You felt surprisingly fine, aside from not sleeping much. But there was another feeling too. One you couldn’t quite describe. It felt like you were stuck in a perpetual hypnopompic state, trapped in the liminal space between being asleep and awake. You were probably just tired. “I’m alright. Just tired, I think. I always have a bit of trouble sleeping in new places.”

Wanda nodded, not entirely satisfied with your answer, but unwilling to press you any further. 

You both turned your head as a very tired looking Natasha came through the doorway. Even with bedhead and tired eyes, she was beautiful. And the smile that spread across Wanda's face as her wife approached was breathtaking. They were picturesque: a type of beauty you could see even through your grief. You had a good feeling about them. Naive as it may be, you were compelled to trust them.

“Morning Y/N,” she yawned, wrapping her arm around Wanda’s waist. “I trust Wanda is taking care of you?” 

You nodded and smiled at them both. “She is.”

“Mmm, she always does,” she hummed, kissing her wife’s cheek. Natasha poured herself a cup of coffee, setting up next to you on the island. She slid you a pen and a pad of paper. “Wands and I are gonna go to the store in a bit. If you’re up for it, you can write down a list of the things you want. Favorite foods, snacks, school supplies, whatever you want.”

You cautiously took the pen. “Oh you all don’t have to go shopping for me or anything just because I’m staying here.”

Natasha leaned against the island, bracing her elbows against the marble. “What if I want to?” She asked in a low, almost testing tone before straightening back up. “It’s really no problem. We’re going to the store anyway. No reason to have you make a separate trip.”

You smiled. You really did hate the grocery store, so you weren’t going to argue. “Careful,” you said lightheartedly. “I might get used to you spoiling me. Then you’ll really have to kick me out.”

Wanda chuckled. She loved seeing this witty, playful side of you peak out beneath your shy, meek exterior. Natasha seemed to bring it out of you. Natasha seemed to bring it out of a lot of people. You couldn’t see the mischievous smirk that spread across her face. “Oh don’t worry. By the time Nat and I let you go you’ll be so high maintenance you won’t settle for anything less. I think you’re due for a good spoiling.” 

A faint blush rose to your cheeks as you finished your list and slid it back to Natasha. “Five items. Woah. I tell you what Wanda, this kid really pushes the limits,” Natasha teased, setting the pen and paper back down in front of you. “Make it ten and I’ll promise to reign in Wanda when it comes to spoiling.” She gives you a wink as you quickly scribble down a few more things. 

************

After a quick trip upstairs to get dressed and ready, they both headed off to the store, leaving you alone to explore the house. The house wasn’t necessarily a “mansion”, per se, but it was certainly bigger than any house you’d ever lived in. Every room had its own special charm. You carefully perused all the repurposed bedrooms and storage spaces you came across, thoroughly exploring all of your surroundings.

Your favorite room, though, was Wanda’s office. It appeared to be a repurposed bedroom on the top floor with a massive window lining the wall and a huge L-shaped desk. It was cluttered, but in a way that made it look more lived-in than messy. Best of all, there was a small indentation in the wall where you guessed there used to be a closet that Wanda had fashioned into a reading nook. The nook sat, pristine and unused, but you could see yourself curling up there for hours. Maybe Wanda would let you sit here and read while she worked. 

You were so caught up in your thoughts you didn’t even hear the front door click open as Wanda and Natasha returned from the store. 

“Y/N? We’re back!” You heard Natasha call from the foyer. You quickly left the office, closing the door as if you were scared they would catch you. You weren’t sure why the idea made you so nervous. They made it clear you were free to explore. You just naturally felt like an intruder, despite being a welcome guest.

“And we have a surprise for you!” Wanda sang as you came down the steps. 

She sat down a number of paper bags before pulling a mossy green blanket from one of them and handing you the silky soft material. You smiled and took it from her, rubbing the soft material against your cheek. 

“I know we’re still getting to know each other, but I noticed yesterday how much you love soft material and I thought you might like a new blanket for your new bed,” she explained, swaying nervously on her feet. She was worried you weren’t going to like it. 

You hummed contently, unwrapping the blanket and throwing it over your shoulders. It was so incredibly soft and it was big enough to cover your whole bed. Much more suitable than the throw blankets you’d brought with you. “Thank you so much. It’s so nice and soft.”

“And we got some popcorn and ice cream because we were thinking about having a little movie night,” Natasha added. “What do you think? We could gather up all the softest blankets and build you a little nest.”

You stood still, shocked by the suggestion. You thought in staying with them, you’d just be a roommate, coming and going with a few scattered interactions. But this wasn’t just a passing interaction like morning coffee was. They were proposing that you spend the evening together. They wanted to hang out with you.

“It’s okay if you don’t want to,” Wanda blurted out after a long moment of silence. “You’ve had a rough couple of days. If it’s more beneficial to just take some time to yourself, hang out in your room, that’s absolutely fine. It’s just a suggestion. If you wanted company.” 

“A movie sounds nice,” you said quietly, pulling the blanket tight over your shoulders. 

Wanda visibly relaxed and smiled softly. “Then I’ll put these groceries away while you two find some blankets.”

“I found one!” Natasha shouted playfully, picking up your blanket wrapped form and carrying you to the corner of the couch where she gently set you down. “You stay here and get comfortable. I’ll go round up some more soft things.”

Both women returned a few minutes later, Wanda with a big bowl of buttery popcorn, and Natasha with a random amalgamation of blankets, pillows, and stuffed animals that she promptly dropped directly on top of you, burying you in the heap. 

“Natalia Alinovna Romanoff!” Wanda shouted disapprovingly, setting down the popcorn bowl and rushing to dig you out. You emerged with a giddy, content smile, snuggled up with a fuzzy body pillow. “She could’ve suffocated.”

Natasha jokingly rolled her eyes, which earned her a playful slap on the bicep from Wanda. She couldn’t possibly stay mad at Natasha after watching you happily wiggle under the comforting weight of the soft blankets. You twisted and flopped around like a puppy walking in circles and scratching its pillow so it could lay in its bed just right. The women smiled and giggled affectionately. 

After a few minutes, you finally settled, surrounded in a nest of blankets. 

“Do you have something in particular you’d like to watch?” Wanda asked, grabbing the remote and settling in next to Natasha on one end of the large couch. 

You shrugged but they couldn’t see it under all the blankets. “I don’t know. Maybe Robin Hood or The Aristocats. Something lighthearted and old.”

Wanda clicked the remote, waving her arm in different directions to try to get the TV to respond. After a moment, Natasha took the remote and easily found an old movie on Disney +. Wanda sneered and scrunched up her face. Natasha kissed her nose. 

The movie played in the background, but you spent more time paying attention to the women curled up on the end of the couch. They weren’t “cuddling”, per se, but their bodies weren’t pressed tightly together with their legs nearly intertwined. They both looked so at peace with each other. You yearned for that feeling. 

“You wanna join us?” Natasha asked almost playfully when she caught you staring. 

Wanda, who was closer to you, opened her arm and beckoned you over. 

You paused for a moment before emerging from your blanket nest, crawling up and laying hesitantly beside her. You rested your head in the crook of her arm, but kept your hands curled up against your own chest. 

“Well hang on now, I want some cuddles too. Get over here,” Natasha said with a mischievous smile before pulling you in between them. You giggled as you were gently pulled over Wanda plopped into a small spot on the couch in between them. You nearly head butted Natasha in the process. Wanda pulled your new blanket from the heap and tucked it around the three of you. Natasha wrapped her arm around you and smiled. “Much better.”

You settled into Natasha's chest with your back pressed up against Wanda while she ran her hand gently up and down your spine. You sighed, content in their cocoon of warmth. You felt so supported and loved, affectionately squished between the two women. 

“Are you alright, honey? You're shaking,” Natasha asked, looking down at you with a hint of concern. You furrowed your brow in confusion. You weren’t shaking. But as you started to pay more attention to your body, you noticed she was right. There was a small, almost imperceivable tremble in your muscles. Almost imperceivable unless you happen to be laying on top of someone, of course. 

“And your muscles are so tight. Like you're constricting your entire body,” Wanda added, sitting up to look at your face. “If this is making you uncomfortable we don’t have to…”

“No,” you interrupted. “No it’s not that. It’s just…” You were suddenly aware of your body in a way you hadn’t been in quite some time. It felt like returning to a home you didn’t remember leaving. It was like when you’re going somewhere and you get to your destination, and you can’t remember the drive. You were just… home.

Before you even recognized it, the shield you had unintentionally built started to crumble. Tears fell from your eyes, wetting Natasha’s shirt. “Oh poor baby, you must be exhausted, living with your body so… activated all the time,” Wanda cooed sympathetically.

Neither of them were surprised. In fact, both women acted as if they had anticipated this. Natasha pulled you closer, cradling your head under her chin and gently rocking you. “It’s okay. You're safe now, baby. We’re not gonna let anything happen to you. We’re gonna protect you.”

Their words only made you cry harder, but in a freeing, cathartic way. Wanda rubbed the back of your head gently, leaning over to say “Let it out. We’ve got you, angel. You don’t have to be scared anymore.”

Their words seeped into your bones, giving you permission to crumble as you sobbed into Natasha’s chest. They both continue to soothe you, rubbing your back and stroking your hair. Neither of them chided or rushed you, giving you time to adjust. Wanda brought you some water. Natasha helped you sit up as she pressed the cool glass to your lips. 

As your sobs faded to sniffles and your eyes started to droop, Natasha whispered “It’s alright. You can fall asleep here. We’ll get you to bed.” You drifted off, finally relaxed and at peace.

[paperstorm]

Favourite fandom memories

Watching 4x16 and 4x18 live. Watching every episode live is fun, but I don’t think there has ever been more unhinged joy in our little tumblr community (at least not in my time in this fandom, sadly I wasn’t here for Push or the engagement!) than during the soulmates scene and the wedding. The evening of 4x16 was off the charts, I remember it so vividly. We were all losing our entire minds – Carlos called them soulmates! Carlos said ‘baby’ not once but TWICE!!!!!!!! – and it was just so, so much fun. And the entire week of promo leading up to 4x18 was just dizzying and exciting and endlessly joyful, and the episode itself was such a whirlwind of heartbreak and ecstatic love and happiness and I will always be grateful I got to experience it with this lovely group of people.

Fics and art and gif makers! This fandom is more blessed than any I’ve ever been in with a deep bench of talented writers. My ‘to read’ list remains miles long despite my attempts to keep up with it and that’s because the writers around here are constantly churning out impeccable stories that are full of love and nuance and poetry and wonderful storytelling and HOT ASS SMUT and it’s been such a joy to get to read all your incredible work for FREE. And to the amazing artists, there are fewer of you but that means each of you shine even brighter when you give us such beautiful visual displays of Tarlos and our other favourite characters, bringing to life things that otherwise would only exist in our minds. And to the gif makes, the true backbone of tumblr fandoms, thank you for your tireless work and for colouring away the dull ass filters used on this show and brightening up scenes so we can actually SEE THEM and for noticing parallels and slowing down kisses and zooming in on hands and all the other wonderful things you do.

Friends! Everyone is saying this but it’s true for me too, the friendships are the best part of fandom and I have made such wonderful ones. I won’t tag them since they know who they are but to the people who I talk to on a daily (or near-daily) basis and plot fic with and complain with and enjoy the show with and send little presents to, who make me laugh, who listen and commiserate on cloudy days, who cheer me on, who hold me accountable and make me a better person, you’ve made this a fun place to be for years now and I hold every one of you close to my heart. (and if you have ever send me a nice anon, I hold you in this category too. We are friends, even though I don’t know your name)

TK Strand This is a bit of a diversion but a final thing I did want to say that TK means so, so much to me on such a deeply personal level, probably more than any other character I’ve ever loved. In this fandom I have been more honest about my own struggles than I’ve ever been online and it has been really heartwarming to have that (mostly) met with kindness. I am humbled by it and grateful for it <3

Thank you for creating this game @thisbuildinghasfeelings and to @annoyingcloudearthquake @strandnreyes @everlastingday @nancys-braids @reyesstrand @carlossreaders @nisbanisba @tellmegoodbye @heartstringsduet @freneticfloetry @firstprince-history-huh @carlos-in-glasses @bonheur-cafe @herefortarlos and @henrygrass for tagging me! I have been so busy lately I fully missed wip wednesday but I will go through this weekend and queue up all your fandom memory posts!!

[mqriuss]

07 | Now playing: How Sweet

from 'bad girls that haven't been caught' series

note: this might be one of my favourite chapters

playlist | series masterlist

curiosity got the best of him.

rindou had told you in class that he'd be a few minutes late today. it wasn't for any urgent matter, he just wanted to spy on your boyfriend, that's all!

the floors of the indoor basketball court squeaks from coming into contact with their shoes. rindou quietly makes his way up to the mezzanine floor where he can watch them from a good distance. fumio is as concentrated on court as he is in the classroom, but his cockiness skyrockets when he's playing basketball. rindou's seen him play a match before, him and ran sat just below a group of girls from their school. so every time fumio looks their way to flash them his pearly whites and wink, the two brothers had to try not to gag. they stopped trying eventually.

fumio was no different now. it was just a practice match so no one was around, but all of his winking and grinning went to the cute managers. rindou squints, one of them was the first year manager that he saw last time he was here.

she was getting an awful lot of attention from him.

the opposing team's coach calls for a timeout, and fumio is immediately making his way to her. he talks to her with a smug look on his face, drinking from his water bottle that she handed him. rindou can't help clicking his tongue at the sight. he lingers a little longer to watch them.

he already knows for sure he's cheating on you, and his suspicions are confirmed further when he sees fumio's teammates teasing and nudging him as they return to court.

y/n: where are you?

rindou's phone vibrates in his pocket—he checks the time and only realizes now that he's fifteen minutes late.

rindou: sorry something came up im omw

the next three days is weird for you. rindou is being really nice. like, really nice.

he buys you the juice box you like everyday before you do. that, and he actually pays attention to what you're teaching him now and asks you questions. is this how nakajima sensei feels?

the other day you forgot your pencil case at home, and the first person to give you their pen was rindou. you didn't even know he carries any stationery on him. especially when all he does is sit there and listen to music. he also asked you what your favourite song was yesterday and proceeded to give you a long list of songs that sounded similar to it.

you were a lot less quiet in class now because rindou would talk to you every now and then. normally, you'd be pretty quiet if you weren't bickering with fumio. but you aren't really on talking terms right now.

this even lead to some rumors. who could rindou possibly be to you? but you've established your image enough as the studious, smart girl with a good reputation that no one really goes too far with their assumptions. there's no way you'd date or befriend a delinquent, let alone one of the haitanis.

the day before the quiz is just another day. rindou makes his way to the library after school with a slight pep to his step. he spots you at your usual table. "boo," he lets out casually, settling down beside you.

today, you were just revising the material together. there's not much to teach him anymore. it gave him a bit more time to steal glances at you and think, you look so much happier these days. he sees it in the way your hand has a gentler grip around your pen, you allow yourself a break more often instead of drowning in work to distract you from your thoughts, and you look a lot less robotic overall.

it's that damn boyfriend, rindou concludes mentally.

"so," he starts, grabbing your attention. "how are you and fumio?"

your face drops momentarily. "he hasn't talked to me."

"why are you still with him?" rindou rolls his eyes, spinning a pencil on his fingers. "actually, i don't get why you're with him to begin with."

you rest your chin against the palm of your hand, tapping a finger against your cheek. "i think we both started to enjoy challenging each other, making fun of each other... then he confessed first," you tell him, and rindou furrows his eyebrows upon hearing that.

"you know that guy's talking an awful lot to that first year manager, right? don't you think it's suspicious?"

"i know," you nod and he remains quiet, letting you continue. "i also know they're just friends, but i got... jealous."

just friends? your words made rindou want to laugh.

you empty out what remained in the juice box, and crushed it in your hand. rindou watches as your nails nearly formed holes on it. "truth is, i was hanging out with you after school to make him jealous," you added and for some reason, rindou isn't surprised. it's like he almost knew this was coming. "it worked. he got jealous and started showering me with attention again."

"but he started ignoring you again, didn't he?" rindou chimes in and all you could do was nod. "so that's why you wanted to tutor me after school?"

"yeah, i knew he'd either be in the library or at practice. so if he ever came here, he'd see us together," you explain, putting the juice box aside. as you eyed the empty drink, you couldn't help imagining fumio before flicking it with your fingers, knocking it over on the table.

"hm," rindou hums, pushing his glasses up while looking around. "i haven't really seen him around though?"

"he did come here on some days. you were too busy studying to notice."

"oh?"

"mhm, so i really don't know why he hasn't spoken to me. even though he's seen us together so often now," you think out loud.

"because he doesn't care about you anymore," is what rindou wants to say, but he doesn't. he doesn't say anything.

"enough about him—i'm gonna look for a book and you're going to help me." you stand up and rindou follows you suit.

he helped you look through the top shelves, "i think this might be it? wait, no. this one." he pulls out two books and is about to ask you which was the one you're looking for, only to find you frozen in your spot and looking ahead. "y/n?" rindou tilts his head before following your gaze.

i'll let you connect the dots: fumio, first year basketball team's manager, lip locking.

rindou's eyes widen slightly and turns back to look at you. he's even more shocked when he sees you're already picking up a book and throwing it in fumio's direction.

"ack!" fumio exclaims, separating him from the manager. rindou snickers when the book hits him perfectly on his head.

"we're done, fumio," you announce, speed-walking away from the scene before he could say anything. rindou's smile fades and follows you with the two books in hand, but not before glaring at your now ex-boyfriend.

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