#but it would be super nice if buying a used car didnt wipe out the vast majority of my savings and leave me in that

[foreignobjecticus]

Me: budgeting very strictly to buy the near-cheapest, most reliable car available

Also me: .......4L Jaguar... Vroom vroom ...

[tumblebee-the-smol-bean]

For the classification verse what about little V who gets classified one year later than everyone else cause he's the youngest and during that year he tries to be as caregiver like as possible and the others are like "he's either neutral or a caregiver" cause he is like baby whisperer, cares for them. He gets his results back and he's like 0-2 age range regressor and he cries because he wanted to be the emo parent despite knowing deep down he was a regressor

Aight. Here we go. Since you didnt specify a caregiver I decided on Janus because I'm a sucker for Momceit and baby virge. Hope you enjoy!

Virgil gnawed at his fingers from the passenger seat of Janus's car. They were all packed into his minivan to go to Virgil's house so he could receive his classification. Being almost a full year younger than the rest of his friend group he was the last to be classified, but he had been there for the others when they were so he knew what to expect mostly. That didn't help quell the knotting in his stomach though, nor the bouncing of his knee.

A chuckle came from the seat behind him. "Calm down chemically imbalanced romance! It's rather obvious you're going to be a neutral anyways. We can be neutral buddies!" Roman smiled.

"No way!" Remus scoffed "he's definitely a caregiver! I mean he can calm me down. Me! That's some super caregiver powers right there." Virgil smiled fondly. It was true, when the others regressed he did the best he could to take care of them and make them happy. To be as much of a caregiver as he possibly could be. The others had taken to calling him 'the baby whisperer' because he was so good with them. To be honest that was the classification he was hoping for and he had been trying so hard to make it so that it was the one he received, despite the little inkling in the back of his mind.

"Now now." Janus tutted "we dont know what Virgil is going to be, let's not assume."

"Yeah!" Patton piped up "whatever you get we'll be super duper happy for you kiddo!"

"Indeed" logan nodded "although based on behaviors and subconscious tics I would say that-"

"Logan, stop. Hes going to get it in a few minutes anyways." Jan says smoothly. He of course was a caregiver. He often looked after Remus when Logan wasn't available and sometimes Patton as well. He sort of shared babysitting duties with Virgil. They made an odd duo being the oldest and youngest respectively. But they always took good care of the smol beans. Sometimes though...Virgil would find himself wishing Janus would show him the same affection he showed to the others when they were small. Wrap him up in a blanket and cuddle him till he fell asleep. Safe and happy.

He shook his head to clear the thought as they approached his house and all hopped out next to his mailbox. The letter was plain and official looking. No indication of what the contents might contain.

"Well?!" Remus was practically bouncing on his feet and Patton, despite looking excited himself took on his caregiver persona, much diffrent than his regressed persona and placed a steadying hand on his shoulder. "Calm Remus, I bet Virge would like to open it inside on his sofa instead of out here."

Remus nodded and they all shuffled inside. Virgil Janus and Logan sat on the couch and Patton remus and Roman lose on the floor.

Virgil took a deep breath and his heartbeat sped up as he picked up the letter and carefully broke the seal and pulled it out with trembling fingers. His eyes scanned the letter and...he dropped it with a small sniffle. He had wanted so badly to be the emo parent but it didnt look like that was in the card. Most of his friends looked confused and concerned but Janus just nodded to himself as if this was something he had expected and picked up the letter from the floor, not looking at it and tucking it into his pocket.

"I think Virgil needs a bit of space. Logan, take my keys?" The glasses clad one nodded in understanding and took them, ushering the rest out the door after they gave Virgil hugs and told him that even if they didnt know his classification whatever it was they were proud of him.

Then only he and Janus were left.

They sat for a few minutes in silence before Janus broke it. "I apologize for staying but I did not want to leave you alone, although it seemed you needed some space." An explanation for why the others had left. And honestly? Virgil was glad. He didnt think he could do this with everyone else here...and having Janus here was...nice. so he just nodded quietly.

"May I look at your letter?" He asked softly as he pulled it back out of his pocket.

Virgil hesitated...but...regressors often regressed right after receiving their classifications and someone needed to know so he nodded.

Janus carefully unfolded it, read through the contents and nodded. "0-2 is a little on the young end but I think we can manage."

Virgil sniffled again and felt himself start to slip as Janus mentioned his age range. Of course he couldn't have even been a kiddo like Patton at 8 or 9. No he had to be the absolute youngest of the group.

Janus placed a hand on his shoulder. "Its alright to be small Stormcloud."

He shook his head and felt a tear fall. He didnt want to be small...well he did but he also didn't. It was confusing.

"Yes it is." Janus wiped away the tear and paused. "May I cuddle you?" Virgil didnt even have to think about it. He nodded quickly and Janus pulled him close, wrapping his arms around him and carding a hand through his hair.

"Shhhh, shhhh, it's okay baby, everything's okay, just relax."

The soothing tone and grounding touch soon had Virgil slipping into what he could only assume is his small space. He calmed down a bit and nuzzled into Janus with a soft coo.

"There you are little one." Janus smiled. "Its alright, you're safe. Do you know how old you are?"

Virgil only cocked his head in response. He didnt feel like using words right now.

"Ah, currently nonverbal I see." He hummed "perhaps I'll teach you some sign language later, but for now," he hummed again and picks up his backpack. "I have a few goodies for you. I always buy some things for classification reveals just in case." He explained and Virgil stared at it curiously from where he's pressed up against Jan.

"Its not much but should be enough for now. We can get you some more things later."

The first item he pulls out is a stuffed raccoon that makes Virgil gasps

and his eyes go starry. He starts to resch for it but then draws back and looks questioningly at Janus.

He nodded with a small smile. "Its yours love, go ahead."

Virgil gingerly takes it and rubs it against his face, squeaking in delight when he realizes it doubled as a rattle.

Jan wore a soft smile as he retrieved the next items. A dark purple pacifier that he held out to Virgil who immediately accepted it and then a sippy cup and bottle of similar skeleton designs.

"It looks as if this one is more suited to you at least right now." He picks up the bottle and sets the sippy cup aside to put in the cabinet later.

"Last things, are you ready?"

Virgil nodded and clutched his raccoon tight to his chest as he sucked on his new Paci.

He pulled out a pair of soft gothic kiddie pajamas and a black blanket with purple bats on it. Virgil started babbling and reaching out to touch the soft fabrics. Janus chuckled.

"Would you like to wear them?"

He nodded.

"Do you need help?"

He hesitated but slowly nodded again before hiding his face behind his racoon. Janus smiled. "No need to worry little bat. I dont mind."

He quickly helped him into the Pjs and wrapped him into the blanket like a mini taco.

Virgil cuddled up and yawned softly.

"Naptime for the little baby bat I think."

Virgil whined.

"Shhh, you're tired, and I'll be here when you wake up."

"Pwomse?" Its very soft and the first thing hes said since regressing. Janus practically beamed.

"I pinky promise."

And so they locked pinkies and Virgil fell asleep, wrapped tightly in his blanket and cuddling both Janus and his racoon.

[keigoloveminty]

Diamond

Plot: The party was super fancy and new to you, until it wasnt. A very questionable and scary experience for you.

Pairing/s: Hawks x Reader, Izuku x reader, Todoroki x reader, Shinsou x reader, Dabi x reader, Shigaraki x reader, Genten x reader, Aizawa x reader

All characters are aged up to 25+

Warning: Mafia Au, LOV crew is soft to reader,(No Yandere’s just jealous and angry exes :>), Partyy in the houseee, (Please dont at me-- I'm just making this up as I go--)

ALSO ALSSOOO please enjoyyyy :’3

Chapter 2

You squealed as you held the seatbelt tightly as Dabi steps on the pedal,”D-DABI! SLOW DOWN YOUR GOING MAKE ME SPILL MY GUTS OUT-”, you screamed trying to hold onto something tight. Dabi grunts as he speeds up and suddenly turns right, the car screeches while you you shut your eyes tightly now holding and the door. A few minutes of you being pushed from left to right and then your breath almost getting knocked out from Dabi speeding up again,’W-wont we get chased down by a police-- DABI IS GOING TO KILL ME--’, your mind was screaming for you to get out of the car but you weren't stupid enough to do that. Dabi slowed down just a bit as you both entered the Highway,”By the looks of things I guess we’ll be there just on time for the opening ceremony ends..”, Dabi looks to your side to see your eyes wide while breathing heavily. He moves on hand to grab your hand tightening it slightly,”You okay? you seemed stunned..”

You looked back at him with a ‘Are you serious?’ expression, how could he not feel like jelly when he just literally just blasted through the streets and still feel fine, you were here beyond stunned,’H-how can he just say that unfazed?! Is he secretly a top Race driver?! He literally turn me into jelly--’, you sighed trying to calm your beating heart. You squeezed his hand as you leaned back into the seat, you closed your eyes trying to regain and steady your breath. A few moments later you looked back at Dabi with your eyebrows furrowed,”You could've warned me, Dabi!”, He just rolled his eyes focusing using one hand on the stirring wheel while holding your hand in the other,”I’m as fast as my car can take me doll, I'm trying to get us there on time. Sorry about that Doll”, you sighed and turned your head to look at him. Dabi grumbles,”Sorry about that Doll”, You sighed and muttered out ‘Its fine’ as you starred at him with starry eyes, you didn't had time to look at how he fully looked nice you were rushing with time since you only focussed on how his suit looked great.

The lights from the outside framed his face as he drives, the way his hair was styled just a tad bit, still in a messy but in a stylish way. You had a feeling he wouldn't cover his scars but since this was a fancy party you had a feeling he would,’So breath taking... .. I’m almost jealous, hpmh’, you puffed your cheeks as you looked at him,’How did you get so handsome.. I feel like I'm missing out on something-- wait’, you squint your eyes and leaned closer to him. His jaw looks defined, sharper nose-- wait are those three silver piercings on his nose,”You got piercings again? How could I not see that..”, Dabi gives you a side glance for a moment only to look back at the road,”Yeah I did and maybe its because you’re short?”, you huffed and looked away from him. 

“Meanie.. . we haven’t seen each other for awhile and you’re already being mean”

“You’re just too easy doll.. .. that's why I have to look out for you a lot”

You turned your head back to look at him,”Did your say something or was I hearing things?”, Dabi just shrugs turning the steering wheel,”You’re probably still shaken up by my driving, why dont you just rest for a bit we’re almost there..”, he says. You let out a soft ‘hmm’ your eyelids slowy fluttering to close letting you get a short nap,’I swear he said something... . but he was too quiet--’, you immediately dozed off as soon as you closed your eyes.

.. ..

Dabi looks at you for a second,’Knocked out cold maybe inviting her to this party was a mistake’, he looks back to the road, he gently squeezed your hands as he looks at the road. Shigaraki was supposed to invite you but decided against it which Dabi didnt like but he knows why you weren’t supposed to be invited to this party. This party could literally kill you which is why Dabi will stick to your side like a glue, literally. He sighs again feeling a bit nervous but excited, you get to at least take a breather from that nasty break up, maybe he could make his move on

He scoffs when his mind drifted to how Shigaraki might turn him to dust,’Thats not happening, not when that decay bastard has his eyes on you too’, he rolls his eyes still keeping his eye on the road. You both were almost there, just a bit more and you’ll both arrive at the venue. Dabi mind was filled with thoughts about what could happen tonight, this party isn't open to all and only few are invited to even get a glimpse of the growing Paranormal Liberation’s new leader, Shigaraki. Dabi never intended to let get your there on time since he didn’t want you to hear that speech that could literally spill everything of what job Shigaraki has, the people that were going to attend that party was strictly for business proposes. They don’t just throw some stupid party with no meaning to it other than to flaunt their power, as much as possible they needed more loyal people-- as if it wasn’t enough-- to join their side.

It was all to show to those people who decided to make an enemy of them will be completely wiped out and also to scout more people to add to their power and ranks. But all of the higher ranks are taken by the original LOV crew, they didn’t have much to worry about other than those who dare to go against them in a false partnership and tried to act like they were smart but they didn’t think their plan through enough which ultimately led to their demise. 

Or in short, sweet death 

 Dabi eyed the mask that sat right in front of his steering wheel, it was a half face mask that was ironically shape like a demons mouth, it was a “disguise” that his group picked out, told him it suits him since demon breath out fire which in return earned them a punch to the head. He didn’t want to wear the mask cause it wasn’t his taste also it was tacky and didn’t like that he wasted at least half of his money to buy a suit to match the mask. But he didn’t complain one bit since he convinced Shigaraki invite you which he and the group had to try and bribe him, they all missed you.

“This party is just for show, we're here to scout potential clients and loyal follower. We might get uninvited guests so make sure to stay sharp on your designated posts, got it?”, Shigaraki says as he went over to memorised his opening lines for the party, Dabi had his arms on top of the couch looking straight at the ceiling starring directly the chandelier. Toga was talking with Magne on what to wear to the party, Mr. Compress was talking to the chefs through the phone on what to serve in the party. Twice was being twice as always and Genten was polishing his gun.

Dabi was waiting for the right time to ask Shigaraki,’Why the hell isn't he bringing up about y/n.. .’, he squints his eyes from starring too much at the light and looks back at Shigaraki’s back. Just as Dabi was about to open his mouth, Toga beat him to it,”So are we inviting n/n-chan?”, the whole room turns to Toga as she puts down a bright red dress. Shigaraki stops mumbling his lines and looks at Toga, she turns around and grins,”I’m not going to cooperate unless n/n-chan comes annddd I'm not going to enjoy this party, Tomuraaaa”, she whines and pouts.

Shigaraki grumbles out turning his attention to Toga,”As much as we want too we can’t risk---”, Dabi cuts him off,”We can just get more security inside and outside the area, I'm pretty sure we have enough power to do that”, Dabi stands up from the couch and walked towards to the kitchen where Mr. Compress is. Genten turns the gun to look at the other side and wipes the dirt off,”We have the support if Destros himself.. ... only half though since some half of his men are doing other jobs like searching for those who raided our clients products just last week, sending invitations to small and big businesses and lastly tracking down Hawks group that also stole half of our goods”, Genten says as he places the now polished gun in its case.

He stretches his arms and yawns,”Besides, I miss Y/n and thanks to you putting me on duty-- outside the venue”, harshly pointing out that he isn't slightly pleased at all being assigned when there's going to be party,”Make me mad that I want to ice you but since you’re my boss I can’t do that and you might not agree to let Y/n come...”, he slumps down in the couch, furrowing both of his eyebrows, displeased that he has to be on duty. Shigaraki throws his index card down a near by table and scratches his neck, Shigaraki does want to invite you but due to his rivals around Japan— much less the people going to this party, he couldn't risk them knowing he had a friend outside his work, its too dangerous for them to know.

Knowing it’s you they might be after, Shigaraki doesn't want to trap you-- or hide you from the world, you didn't deserve that after what happened to you when you lost your parents.

                 Shigaraki will not allow it 

Shigaraki sighs heavily rubbing his eyes with his gloved finger,’This idiots can’t be serious.. although the people who are attending this party are selected there’s always going to be that one person who’s going to ruin it all and all of them are highclass criminals and Mafia’s’, he ruffles his hair, his mind in conflict on whether or not he will invite you. Dabi sees this and takes this opportunity to negotiate,”What if I'll be the one to escort her to the venue, I'll stick to her like glue--”

“That's not going to work, they know exactly who you are, Dabi. You could put Y/n on their lists of target and none of us want that”

He holds his tongue not wanting to fight as it could lower his chances of getting Shigaraki to say ‘yes’ into inviting you,”Not if I have some sort of disguise to cover up this fucking scars, come on shit face”, at this point Dabi might as well throw all those ‘Y/n’ cards to bribe him. He looks at Genten, he tilts his head to Shigaraki,’Help me out you ice freak--’ he mouths to Genten, Genten looks at him with a lazy expression.

‘Trust me, we all want to see Y/n’

Genten quickly tries to think of something in order to help Dabi,”Imagine how happy would Y/n look if she saw us all--”

“Your on outside duty have you already forgotten? You might as well greet her outside the gate and thats it.”, Shigraki with a monotone voice. This time it was Toga’s turn to try and bribe Shigaraki,”Oh! Oh! Think about how she’ll look super cute all dressed up!! You wouldn't miss that for the world now do you Tomuraa”, she grins trying to imagine how you would look like all dolled up.

“Yeah! I wanna see the precious Diamond too!! She'll look sexy walking down the floors!!”, Twice adds while squealing with Toga. Mr. Compress puts his phone on mute and looks at Shigaraki,”Shigaraki-san, the Violet squad has returned from their assignment and will be helping out in terms of security and look out as well. They have claim to have also wiped out some of Todoroki’s men and came out with minor injuries”, he returns to the phone calls while jotting down on a piece of paper. Shigaraki still not fully convinced crosses his arms and gestures them to keep trying,”Like I said before, I can find a disguise to cover my scars, I promise to stick by her side”, Dabi looks at Shigraki with a serious expression.

“I’ll take my outside duty serious”

“I’ll make sure to cooperate nicely too!!”

“I’ll make a lot of doubles to scout the area out!! They won't ruin this party, no sir!”

“Silence, all of you”, they all shut their mouths. The room intense as Shigaraki turns his back and walk towards the huge window that shows the whole city from below. Shigaraki thinks carefully on how many things may happen, if they do break he needs to know where you’ll escape. But he can't let that happen, every corner must be covered in security-- the roof as well. None of them had a warp gate like they do to transport things carefully but he knows how skilled some of them are working in the shadows, he stares at the lights from below with a straight face,’Y/n-san.... .. we haven't seen each other in awhile, back up has come but.. .’

His mind is filled with a lot of thoughts of what could and would happen, Hawks group is a sneaky bunch along with his partner, Tsukoyomi, who they know has a quirk that works well in the dark. That paired along with Hawks quirk which they recently been told by a spy they sent to get inside information, is able to pick up sounds, control each individual feather as well as sharpen them. Unfortunately, their group has yet to acquire a healer but that was temporarily solved by the professors healing capsules, they get three each on a mission and it takes a few minutes for the healing to take effect. It’s only good for minor injuries, it can heal injuries like big cuts but as for gun shots, not so much as its takes even longer to heal if you don't get the bullet out.

Whats more annoying is that not only that they also have other skilled members that even more annoying to deal with,’Professor has yet to create a nomu that for us or the scouting group that sensei set to find a skilled healer.. we have enough power on our side with our connections but still--’, Shigaraki clenches his fists. He really wants to invite you and get your mind off your breakup, he never really asked what your lovers looked like or even asked to meet them since you never tried to introduce your partners to them and because you know that they would be too busy and they usually their free-time just time to catch up with what you were doing with your life.

He knew he wasn't supposed to have a weakness when sensei told him he was going to be the next heir to the business but for you he made an exception, it was your kindness that made him melt down all his walls. Whenever he was going through something tough, just a little encouragement from you or just a small talk with you made him feel better. What hurts him the most is when he cant be there on time to comfort you when you need it, he didn't want to keep his night job a secret from you but he knows you’re bound to find out one way or another.

You aren't some dumb person, you just choose not to and just keep quiet about it to not get in trouble

And that's what scares him the most to the point where he couldn't sleep properly for somedays, he doesn’t know if you’ve figured it out yet

He shakes his head and tries to remove those thoughts from his head,’No.. thats not going to happen, not on my fucking watch’, if he was going to let you go to this party--that he knows is going to attract there attention-- he needs to make sure that once there's a security breach, he's already telling Dabi or whoever is going to escort you out of the venue-- together you out fast and quiet. He’ll make sure Kurogiri is on his com to make sure as soon as he sends a signal he’ll have his portal up in second straight to your home, send more people to secure the place. As much he doesn't want to tarnish his reputation but when it involves you, he wouldn't give a shit but its not like a little security breach is going to affect his reputation-- maybe his partnerships with other leaders but who's to say they would turn away from him, knowing the power he holds.

This wouldn't be a problem if it wasn’t for his childish choices to just jump in to try and take out his rivals but ultimately failed and losing half of his men but as the months went on he learned to be more smarter and move smarter. Taking out people that are associated with his rival-- U.A corporations-- no matter how big or small they are of a threat, if they are associated with them in anyway, they take them out or if they have potential they kidnap them for information, steal their quirk or get turned into nomu’s. 

Shigaraki reaches to rub his eyes but stops when he hears you scolding in his head

“Don’t rub them Tomura-chan! You’ll irritate it more!” 

        It’s itchy, what do you want me to do about it?

“Stop stop!! Don’t rub it anymore!!!”

       Then scratch it for me then if you don’t want me scratching it

“Your bleeding again Tomura, didn’t I told you not to scratch them... . I just finished rubbing some ointment on too...”

      Right, sorry about that... .

“Don’t pick on your lips either also put some lip balm on it occasionally-- its not girly!! I want to make sure you look good when you kiss a girl!!”

     Who am I going to fucking kiss anyways? I'm not going to kiss anyone if its not you...

Shigaraki smiles unconsciously when he hears you scolding him so he didn’t rub his too hard,’Even when you aren’t physically here, you're still scolding me. Telling me to stop rubbing and picking at my skin.. the things you do to me Y/n...’,he sighs heavily and looks back at the groups who was still waiting for him to give his finally thought in inviting you. They all stopped what they were doing and looked at their boss,”Fine.. she can come--”, Toga grins and raises her arms up. Twice and his other self talked in what to wear to the party, Mr. Compress tips his hat, Geten nods, Dabi mumbles out a quite “Yes!”

“On one condition..”

.. ..

Dabi slows down the car as he enters the road that had thick trees that covered his view,’Had to pick a venue thats waayyy out there, talk about protective..’, he scoffs. He remembers vividly how Shigaraki sent his men to give out last minute changes about the new location for the party to the guests and recall how he asked Professor to personally borrow three of his high ends to which he agreed to. His teacher didn’t mind as long as they get to hold to the party and find new people to add to their assets. 

The new venue that he had picked out what way out of the city-- in cases of.. well, possible collateral damage considering the quirks they have and to not worry about causing too much damage that may have a dent on their name, not that anyone would come after them for destroying property unless they want to die. Its on a mountain and it takes a while to get there since there's a lot of curves and it also possible intruders to make their escape a bit hard if they decided to get lost in the thick forest.

‘This curves are making me sick-- I think we’re almost there, I can see those lights’

A few minutes later, you both finally reached the venue after half an hour on the road he notices a lot of fancy cars that were parked up on the outdoor parking lot, all places almost filled up. He grabs his ear piece that allowed him to talk with his group,”Genten, tell them to open the gates... .. I’ve arrived with Y/n safety”, he talks through the earpiece. His earpiece sends a static with made him scrunch his face and almost pulled it off his ear,”Told the guards to open the gate for you, just drive up to the front ”,the static cuts stops. 

Dabi drives up to the gate, he gave the guard a side look and just gave a short nod and looked at his buddy to open up the gate. He drives inside and goes straight to the back part of the venue, where the important people get to park their cars, he turns the wheel slowly and quickly finds a spot. He backs up his car, sets his breaks to park and turns off the car, he looks back at your sleeping figure and admires you just for a little while.

‘Sleeps like a true doll... how cute’

He rubs his thumb on your hand that was still laced in yours from the whole ride to the venue,”Doll wake up, we’re here now”, he says and squeezes your hand, he reaches out to cup your cheek with his hand that was on the steering wheel. He caresses it softly watching you finally stirring awake,”5 more minutes...pleaseee”, you whined trying to get a little more sleep. Dabi shakes his head and looks at his watch,”Don’t you want to see Shigaraki and the others?”, you slowly got up and Dabi lets his hand that was on your cheek to rest on his legs.

You rubbed your eyes softly as to not ruin your makeup that your spent little time to put on,”Wait let me do a quick retouch on my make up, I don’t want to look like I just took a long nap”, you leg go of his hand and quickly reach for your small clutch bag that carried your makeup, phone and credit card. Dabi lets out a short ‘hm’, trying hard not to lace his fingers back to your hand, he reaches for the face mask and puts it on the lower part of his face and clicks the belt in.

---

You opened your clutch bag  and reach for the small pocket mirror and red lipstick, you swipe just softly to not make it a harsh since you went for a soft gradient look. You puckered your lips to spread the lipstick just a bit then grabbed your blusher to just touch up the faint blush, flicked your up eyelash softly. You turned your head to see if you looked alright, you smiled and out everything back to in your clutch bag. You turned back to Dabi and gave him a short nod while smiling excitedly,”Lets go?”

Dabi ties the black scarf over his eyes to cover up the patchwork under his eyes, which you didn't like the idea of it but you guess it was necessary as to not catch attention--much to your distaste,’Dabi looks cool with is scars, people are just judgemental, hpmh!’, he tightens the scarf just a bit and tugging some parts down. He looks back at you through the scarf and nods, you held in a laugh and covered you mouth,”Whats up with that disguise? Did Shigaraki told you to wear that?”, you asked while tilting your head slightly.

He sighs and rubs his neck looking the other way,”Yeah, apparently he doesn't want the guests to stare at me or make them feel uncomfortable”, he says with a quiet voice. You nod with empathy,”Well I think your scars are cool, especially with your quirk, when you’re not going overboard to hurt yourself”, you say with a nervous laugh. Dabi scoffs playfully at this and shakes his head,”We should probably go, the opening ceremony is probably finished”, you nod and open the door and step out of the car.

Dabi reaches for his back pocket and grabs the black leather gloves, he slips his hands into the gloves, he fixes his hair a bit and once he was done he got out of the car. The night was cold enough to make you shiver as soon as you stepped out of the car first, you fiddles with your small bag and turned your attention to Dabi once he stepped out of the car. Dabi closed the door and locks it with his car keys, he turns to look at your and holds out a hand,”Shall we, doll?”, you smiled and reached for his hand.

You hooked your arms around his arm, humming at the warmth coming off from him, you both walked up to the venue. You looked at the people who were dressed for the occasion, some ladies in red dresses, some in cocktail, beige, black, dark blue. Men in suit and tie all in dark colours but you know none of them stand a slight chance with Dabi, you realised that there also some in masks which made you a bit happy that Dabi wasn't the only on but you know that mask is going to cause some to stare a bit longer.

You both walked up the stairs, Dabi by your side all the way helping you get up the stairs cause heels aren't really your thing. You both reached the entrance of the huge venue and as soon as you looked up you were in awe at how big it is,”Woah... .just how well known is Shigaraki's Family Business is?”, you asked as you both walked up towards the large door. Dabi looks at you for a moment,”More famous than some people would know..he’s kind of a big deal around so parts”, he says.

You gave a short hum and turned your face away from him, you both entered and the person in the front greeted you both,”Welcome, please enjoy your night here at this exquisite party by thee Shigaraki”, you bowed repectfully at the man while Dabi just gave him a small nod. You walked inside the main hall where all the people were all at mingling with other people, you don’t recognise any faces here since you never really cared for famous people anyways.

So you sticked to Dabi’s side for now and try not to get lost in the sea of people,”Soo wheres the others? They should be around here right?”, you asked him. Dabi turns his head to look at you,”Yeah they should be around here.. somewhere but lets just find—“

“Ah, if it isnt Dabi. Fancy meeting you here, care for a short talk?”

A man that looks way too old is accompanied with two other girls that had their makeup way to caked on and dress thats way too skimpy, Dabi lets out a low groan and looks back at you,”Walk the right and you’ll find a table full of food, I’ll talk to this man for a bit..”, you nod and removed your arms from him and walked towards to where Dabi pointed at.

---

Dabi watches you leave and turns back to the old man,”So who’s the pretty lady?”, he asks making Dabi roll his eyes,”None of your goddamn concern, she isnt interested in old shits like you”, the man laughs heavily ans blows on his cigar. Dabi absolutely hates people who has a stick far up their ass,”Now now dont get too possessive now, she’s quite the gem that dress looks eye-catching—“, the girls that were sticked to him like glue whined.

“I thought we were more cuter Sir!”

“Yeah, what she said!”

The man laughs and tries to calm down both jealous girls down,’This fucking whores.. i swear to fucking god’, he did not like the idea of talking to his possible business partner, maybe an enemy or his victim but he couldnt kill him right now. That could cause an uproar and lots of eyes turning to stare at them plus he just go here and most importantly.

You are at this party

Thats what stopping him from charring this man to ashes but he could always save that for later,”Fuck off old fart you better state your business with me or I’ll burn you to bits”, he raises his hands just on his waist level making the man step back just a bit. He clears his throat while the girls fix his tie and dust off the none existent dirty,”A-ahem right business— erm right where was I”, the man spits out whatever offer he has to say.

Dabi puts both of his hands in his pocket clearly half listening to what he has to say,”—my men has a few things to offer you for your leaders ever growing business! I heard you were looking for a skilled healer and have more than enough to offer you some in exchange for something”, His thoughts were cut off when he recalls Shigaraki saying they needed a healer.

“A skilled healer huh.. I’m listening but if this is a joke,—“, Dabi removes his right glove and reaches for the mans tie,”I’m taking you out and might as well rob your fucking business out with it, old shit”, and burns the mans tie just a bit.

  ---

While that was happening you were far from where Dabi was and finally reaching the long table that had bite sized food,”Dabi wasn’t joking when he said a table full of food, it really is!”, you looked at all the food that was diplayed on separate trays. Eclairs, sushi, creampuffs, shucked oysters—probably really fresh but a lot of people are grabbing it, bites sizes cakes, a tower of macarons and many more that you couldnt name

‘What to eat first— eh whatever i reach first I’ll eat it!’,you grabbed a toothpick and reach for a small bite sized sushi and took a whole bite out of it. You hum savoring the rish flavor,”This taste so good!”, you turned to scan what to pick next. Since you started with something raw maybe you should eat a few more raw dishes, you ate a few salmon sashimi then tuna sashimi then— whatever raw fish you ate.

You didnt at too much of it since you needed space for dessert,”Wine, maam?”, a waiter asks you. You shook you head and he nods and walks away, you reached for the glass of water and took a sip to clear your palette. You moved on to desserts now,”Okay.. what to choose first!”, you eyes the various desserts laid in front of you like pieces of jewelry.

“I guess I’ll start with you first!”, you reached for the chocolate ganache cube, you smiled at the velvety texture and lovely taste. You reached for one more and moved on with the next, you eyed the tower of macarons, your eyes sparkled as you looked at each tier. Each their had its own flavour and colour you decided to start with the first tier, you grabbed the pink macaron and took a a small bite, as you chew on it and shiver at the sweet taste,’It’s a raspberry flavour, the raspberry red cream in the middle surrounded in a sweet white cream. I love it!’, you smiled at the taste. 

You eat the whole macaron, thankful its a mini macaron, you moved the next tier which was a slightly off colour white and had a caramelised glazed on top,’I bet this is crem brûlée!’, you took a small bite of it. You swoon at the taste taking your time to savour the taste, you held your cheek and sigh happily,”This tastes so good... if I've known Shigaraki held this kind of parties I wouldn't hesitate to dress up in fancy clothes and eat fancy food!”, you joked to yourself.

You ate the remaining macaron in a heartbeat,”I should slow down.. that also reminds me”, you turned to look behind you trying to find a certain someone. That certain someone was Dabi, you felt like he was still talking to that man that had those two girls clinging on to him,’He’s probably still chatting with that man.. of maybe he is being bombarded with people who want to talk to him?’, you sighed feeling a little bit left out.

The party was filled with unknown faces that made you want to shrink, since you didn't really care for famous faces to begin with you felt like you did not belong here. I mean you had to no like, social status what so ever and your weren't really good in talking to strangers since you always kept to yourself.

Considering the society you live and all the danger thats probably lurking around...

You sighed you realising you lost an appetite to keep eating so you just stare at the food instead deciding to look at it like art displayed on the long table but of course picking up a food that caught your eyes and just moved along. You walked to the right side of the table thats seems to be never ending, your eyes scanned the food as you walked at a slow pace,’I wonder wheres Dabi, he seems to be taking his sweet time--’ 

“Hey now ladies! I’m sure there's more of me to go around”

You stopped walking eyes going wide, you knew that voice-- you knew that voice so well, you used to hear that voice everyday and love it but now you wanted nothing more to forget everything when he dumped you. You turned your head to look behind you, made up excuses in your head that maybe it wasn't him, you were proven wrong when your eyes meet a blonde tuffs of hair, he didn’t have his huge red wings behind him, you guessed he hid them seeing as it was too eye-catching. Your face, now in a frown, scrunched into a disgusted expression when you saw him, surrounded by thirsty women.

The old you would've probably blushed and covered her face trying to look away but sneaked a small peek at him, you scoffed and decided to just walk away from him and all the woman that flaunt their body all over him. A small part of you was pissed, angry and betrayed, if you would've known he was just a heartbreaker you wouldn't have gave everything to him so willingly, and for two years.

‘Ugh.. what a jerk..’

You spat in your mind seemingly to lose interest in staying near the table,”Hmph! Whatever.. he’s just a jerk..”, You turned your face away from him and walked away.

---------------------

Taglist:

@anxiousgoddest @thegalxe

[739337369137371082]

Hey so I found u thru the Halved Live Funnies and I gotta ask... whose Leon? What series these dudes from?

i got this ask and then forgot about it for like 2 days. anyways.

IVE ANSWERED THIS BEFORE BUT. GOD. LEON. ok so like....... long story short last year was when i first played resident evil........ bc we got a copy of re2remake in and.... jesus christ. i hyperfixated so fucking hard for the better part of a year going on into this year. and then i watched hl/vr and well. we know where that went. but now i am once again hyperfixated and now im back to where i was in like.... june of last year LMAO. but anyways i am once again going to ramble under the cut about them <3 (seriously. its very long and doesnt go much of anywhere. also spoilers)

tl/dr:

OK. SO. resident evil. the last time i answered this ask i either hadnt played some of them or just completely forgot the plot of others LOL but now upon beating/playing a large majority of them (besides 6 which i have not touched yet, and 7 is first person and im not rly interested in it rn)...... well others have said this as well but if you like cheesy b action movies you would love resident evil!!! 

the orig 1-2 are more survival horror which is what i like the most. 3 is where it starts branching into more actiony stuff but is still survival horror. but 4 and after is just like..... cheesy action stuff which is fine but not really like.... my thing. altho i do think that they are fun in a “this plot is hilariously bad” type way because i do enjoy horrible things. but people who like resident evil dont like it for the plot they like it for the characters. and for me i latched the fuck onto leon kennedy and tyrant t-00 aka mr fucking x

listen.......... you guys know me relatively well enough to know that i have a type......... and i would define leon as not really fitting under it usually because he is 1. under 6 foot 2. human and 3. very much not a villain. but something about (mostly remake) leon hits fucking different!!!!!! hes kind and means well, thinks about others constantly, looks like an actual fucking person in the in game graphics instead of being some manufactured perfect model, nice voice, etc....... i fucking care him so much. also gameplay wise i find his weapons to be more enjoyable than claires so i always end up playing his route/2nd route the most compared to hers. but i do also like claire :) shes nice and epic

i dont really like the newer leons (4 and afterwards) as much.... i mean a lot of it has to do with trauma and general “growing up” after what happened in re2 but hes just so constantly... snarky? jaded? constantly spouting lines to make him seem cool? when in my head hes very much like... a loser LMAO. i mean dont get me wrong hes a badass. he survives a fucking zombie outbreak and nearly gets murdered dozens of time. thats the definition of badass. but also you cannot change my mind that hes also a anxious loser twunk. there is literally nothing you can do to convince me he is “cool” like the games and movies want to think. this is probably heresy to re fans but this is my truth

https://youtu.be/aVZWuSfGStk?t=129

here is a vid of his cutscenes. obvious spoilers in there but you can skip around and see how cute he is. also yes in his first cutscene he is listening to butt rock. i switch between thinking hes just listening to it because nothing else is on the radio or his taste really is that terrible

also you literally CANNOT convince me that he is straight. the games try SOOOOO hard to get you to ship leon/ada or leon/claire but like...... i cannot see it. he has one of the gayest run animations i have ever seen in re2 remake and i mean... he just radiates gay trans man energy to me. also please look at this small scene from one of the animated movies where a licker jumps on top of him and he wraps his legs around its hips and lifts it off of him to not die. gay king

https://youtu.be/d-VNikxYBPw?t=9

but yes ive basically decided to ignore all characterization from re4 and onwards regarding leon at least. every leon after that is not my leon (except in special cases when im thinking about something like leon/jd from re damnation..... they did jd so dirty and they should have fucking kissed. or how cute he looked in vendetta sometimes)

ANYWAYS. MR X

so basically there are these enemies in resident evil called “tyrants” that are manufactured by the evil capitalist company umbrella that are near indestructible save for like.... rocket launchers or super heavy artillery that youre not buying at your local gun store. and in re2 one of them get sent to the police station where leon and claire are and is told to wipe out all witnesses. (i also do think that 2 or more were sent there... or at least in the area when this happened due to some very obvious plot hole stuff on each route no matter how you play, even tho the devs have come out and said that only 1 existed in the game and that each route is like “a parallel dimension” to each other. i wont go into it more than that but i choose to ignore that)

and well. when i first played it i knew of mr x but didnt like... know much about him other than that he was a monster and Tall (like 7 or 8 feet tall) and that he chased you around. that already sold me on him but then. well. you first encounter him because he lifts up an entire goddamn helicopter and then proceeds to chase you. and it was then that i knew i was in deep shit because he fucking stomped his way into my heart and never left.

mr x basically has serious Side Character Disorder where (even tho the remake made him very cool and epic and did him really well compared to nemesis in re3 remake which is an entire different can of worms) he has LITERALLY no personality or like. thoughts. or anything. hes only there to chase you around and be on screen for like 10 seconds for a couple of cutscenes and then not show up again until the very end of the game for you to fight on leons route. but god. he means so fucking much to me. 

you know how people latch onto random side characters that have no personality and essentially flesh them out more than the creators ever will? thats me with mr x. its gotten to the point where certain songs come on on my spotify and i actually get EMOTIONS or even TEARS because they remind me of him, but its not even really HIM, its the fucking ideas that ive come up with regarding him because all he ever does in game is chase you around and punch you and then die and is never brought up again

but anyways. mr x is a tall monster who chases leon and claire around in their routes but mr x is leons main monster in the game (claire has a different one). he chases leon around, literally never stops looking at him as he chases him, gets hit by an entire fucking car which then explodes BUT THEN chases him down into the sewers and into a secret underground lab just to get to him like a fucking bloodhound who, once he has the scent, will never stop chasing him

(you can see why this made me kind of insane)

just. AGHHH. the tyrants in this series get treated so dirty. i desperately want capcom to give us some sort of tyrant that can actually fucking like.... go against orders and brainwashing or whatever and actually have emotions and thoughts!!!!!!!!!! but capcom would never do anything with it cause its a rough and tough action series and people arent here to see tyrants have some sort of thought process beyond punching and killing and people only want to shoot guns at them instead of thinking about the possibilities of a tyrant that goes against its programming.

i so desperately want an au where mr x got the transmitter shot off of the side of his head (and while capcom never mentioned this ever many re2 fans have since decided that it is what feeds info/orders to him. i flip flop between thinking that it either is near controlling him and prevents free will and thought or that its just giving him orders and that hes just burying/hiding/not showing free will and thought in fear of being killed. either that or someone at umbrella is “piloting” him but also the whole point of tyrants is that theyre supposed to be smart enough to think for themselves somewhat so... eh). GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!

ive explained a bunch of this stuff in my other ask about it but just...... xleon means so much to me when it should not and will never be actually canon

anyways please play re2 remake at least, you dont have to know everything about re1 to like it, just go into it knowing that a few months ago in the mountains outside raccoon city claires brother chris and a few members on his team went to a mansion where they discovered umbrella doing shady zombie shit there. re2 remake was hyped up for years for a reason and it is really good, even if its short (altho i do appreciate short games in this day and age cause not every game needs to be like 60 plus hours long). 

maybe one day when its not late and i can actually think i will explain all this better but todays not that day <3

(EDIT: ALSO RE DAMNATION TYRANTS ARE 14 FEET TALL. AND CHASE AROUND LEON AND ACTUALLY FUCKING RUN. FUN FACT! anyways while i do think jd in that movie and leon should kiss i also want leon and a tyrant from that movie to kiss. bye)

[melonmarky]

Technical Difficulties | Lee Taeyong

Genre: smut ۵ and fluff <3

Pairing: boyfriend!Taeyong

Rating: 18+

Warnings: public(??), blowjob ,swearing

Synopsis: You taeyong have always played it safe, why not spice it up a bit when he needs some time to relax?

You and Taeyong have always been super vanilla.

Your relationship was plain and didnt really cut many corners. The dates you two have seem as if they were plucked out of books or movies. The two of you barely fought and had sex pretty regularly. All of it was good, maybe, too good... there was never a switch in the routine. It was always the same thing every week. Work, home, date, some sex, sleep and all over again. You were happy with Taeyong and your relationship but you were just getting a bit bored. So when Taeyong took you to the local fair instead of the usual restaurant you were excited for the change.

He had surprised you when instead of taking the road to the restaurant he had taken an exit leading to the fair. The big Ferris wheel’s lights bled through the window, showing up on your clothed legs and knees. You both got out of the car and went to the ticket booth. Taeyong had gone up to pay while you stared up at the flashing lights and rides. Your stomach growled a bit and looked around to see any food stall signs. The ferris wheel then came into view, you definitely were going to ride it.

With the tickets now bought and your wristbands on, the two of you walked into the fair. Being hungry you headed straight for the food stall you were eyeing earlier, dragging your boyfriend with you. You went up to the stand and went to buy a pair of churros for the two of you. With the food in hand you both walked through the aisles of games. You surveyed through the dozens of stalls to see which game you would want to play. After a few minutes of searching, you concluded that none really caught your eye at the moment. Taeyong lead you to a small table at the far end of the fair overlooking everything. You sat and brought placed all our belongings in front of you. While Taeyong was busy eating his churro, you had your head in your hand glancing around at all the pretty lights.

They had really went all out this year with the town’s latest fair. There was probably more lights, and rides. Plus you heard that there was a new Ferris wheel. The Ferris Wheel! That was something you could do! Picking up your things you turned to your boyfriends grabbed his hand leading him to the huge wheel. The line was fairly short and moving quickly. With your hands clasped together you waited for it to be your turn. You took one look more at the ferris wheel, it looking way bigger now up close than a moment before. You had a light tap on your shoulder and you turned to see Taeyong gesturing to you that it was time to get onto the brightly colored gondola. The fair worker gave you a nod and a smile accompanied with “have a nice ride!”. You smiled back and got on with Taeyong close behind.

The worker was nice enough to give you both a private gondola with a bit more legroom and more tinted windows. The gondola started to ascend after the doors shut. It was a slow rise but it was fun seeing how high you were going each second. A few minutes go by and your gondola was almost at the very top, a few minutes more and you would be the tallest gondola on the wheel. Looking out you were in awe of the view. You motioned Taeyong to look at your side just for him to giggle at your enthusiasm and agree. Turning to him you stared at his eyes and smiled. “Thank you for taking me here, I’m having a great time so far.”

“You’re welcome, and i’m having a great time too.” He placed a kiss on your forehead and brung his arm around your back rubbing circles with his thumb on your shoulder. Bringing your face closer, inches away from a kiss suddenly the gondola stopped and a voice was heard on the speaker on the ceiling of the gondola. “Due to technical difficulties, the ferris wheel has stopped. Our technicians will be assisting the issue right away. The ride will continue to operate in about an hour. Sorry for the inconvenience.”

You and Taeyong looked at eachother. “What are we going to do know?!” You weren’t particularly scared of heights so as long as the problem is fixed and you get down safely you were fine but Taeyong on the other hand was not as much. “Up this high for an hour!? I mean they can’t just leave us here for that long can they?” He fidgeted with the rips in his jeans and shook his leg up and down. “Baby they’re trying to fix it, we’ll be down in no time.” He tried looking everywhere but the windows and onto the gondola floor. “Every second up here feels like an hour.” Rubbing your hand over his knee you thought of something to calm his nerves. Glazing over your surroundings your eyes laid upon his crotch.

Why not? You thought. With your mind set on this new idea you turned to Taeyong, perching your hand on his shoulder. He glanced up, you gave him a smile and he returned it the best he could. Starting with your hand you started to slide down and onto the gondola floor. He gave you a question look, his mouth about to open but he decides against it curious to what you were getting at. You put yourself in between his legs, smoothing over your hands up his thighs. “W-what are you doing?” Taeyong weakly asked.

“Just getting your mind off of things. Relax, you’ll like it.” Giving him a smirk you ghosted your hand over his growing bulge. Nearing his belt you undid the buckle, unbuttoned his pant button and unzipped his jeans. Assisting, Taeyong stood up slightly letting you slip down his pants and boxers easier. His dick was out in the open for you too touch. Glazing your fingers over his shaft Taeyong’s breath hitched in his throat. You eventually wrapped your fingers around his length and squeezed lightly. With the same pressure you brung your fist up and down his member repeating in areas where he seemed to like.

Moving his shaft up you lick long stripes up to his pink tip. His essence oozed out dripping down. Flattening out your tongue you swiped it over his swollen tip. Taeyong let out a mewl letting his head fall against the gondola wall. “I haven even put it in my moth yet and you’re already worked up.” You brought your lips over and gave it a peck before fully enveloping his length in your mouth. Moving slowly at first you kept a steady rhythm up and down his dick. “F-fuck Y/N.” Taeyong threaded both his hands through your hair, his eyes shutting from the pleasure.

With the big encouragement from your boyfriend you picked up speed, bobbing your head and sucking with a bit more pressure. Taeyong’s moans picked up after this, coming out steadily, his pretty moans filling up the small space. “Shit babe that feels so good.” You resumed your current speed glancing up at your fucked out boyfriend. He looked so pretty with his head whipped back like how it was now. By this point Taeyong was starting to twitch in your mouth, signaling he was almost going to be finished. “I-I’m close baby”

Twisting your hand faster at his base the twitches continued.

“I’m gonna c-cum. Shit!” With that you pulled your mouth off, flattening your tongue ready to catch whatever came out. Taeyong’s milky white ropes landed on your tongue slightly dripping onto your lips and chin. You lapped up all the essence on your face grabbing a wipe from your purse and cleaning the rest. Taeyong caught up with his breath his chest still heaving slightly. Looking at you with hooded eyes he came closer giving you a long peck on the lips and a short on on your forehead. “Thank you for that, I feel a whole lot better.” Giving him a smile you get up and sit on the seat next to him.

Interrupting the moment a voice on the speaker came on. “Thank you for your patience. The ferris wheel has been fixed and will be up and running in just a moment. We hope you this minor inconvenience didn’t affect your enjoyment of the ride.” You glance up at Taeyong and the both of you start to laugh.

“I definitely enjoyed the ride.”

A/N: hellooo another bj drabble haha. Imm thinking of doing something angsty and romancy... would you guys like that?

[leylakinsx13-blog]

THE TIME IS HERE!!! I know some of you have been patiently waiting for me to update this blog you’re in luck!!

Last night we stayed just outside of Chicago since we were supposed to have freezing rain overnight. We were not risking being stuck at home.

We stayed at the country inn and suites, which was actually really nice. Dad wanted deep dish pizza so we swung by this pizza joint that was super packed. Dad said to forget about that place and to just go to the mall I wanted to go to. (*giddy girl squeeee*)

Get to the wood field mall. Also super packed but alas, we trudged through anyways. When we leave dad says “well, that was just exciting.” Insert all the sarcasm in the world to that comment. Shocking. I know.

Anyways, we leave the mall. And try the same pizza joint except in a different location. STRIKE TWO! This was just a place you order and take pizza to go. No thanks.

So dad had emailed me a restaurant last week or something like that of a restaurant we could go to, third time is a charm, right? We go inside and it’s like a 40 minute wait unless you wanted to eat at the bar.

We got on the table wait list, the bar was full so we just hung out until I sniped a spot at the bar. SUCCESS! I didn’t cancel the table just in case it was not going to be too terribly long. We ordered food at the bar, started eating, finally we get called to a table. We just laughed and carried on with dinner which was delightful. Moretti’s if anyone is curious.

After dinner we headed back to the hotel for the evening and went to bed. We’re seriously exciting people.

7AM Sunday: Flight day!!!

My wonderful alarm goes off at 7. We got up headed over the free breakfast because, well, it’s me. If there’s food, there’s a Leah.

Finish up breakfast, dad has a smoke, we grab our stuff and head to the shuttle. Here’s a good laugh for everyone... I hop in the shuttle van and bounce right onto the seatbelt clamp. Seriously, I think my right asscheek is bruised.

We get to the airport, I’m briefing dad on everything. “Take your coats off, take your belt off, take your shoes off... blah blah blah” dad: “I can only do one thing at a time!!”

We make in through TSA with no incident. However while I’m packing all of our snacks back into my bag, a TSA agent asks if this random tray of chocolates and powdered coffee creamer is mine to which I said no. He then proceeds to ask if I want it. (It’s too early in the morning for me so I’m just standing there dumbfounded for a moment) I say “uhh.. no? I’ve watched too much Drugs Inc. on Netflix. I have no idea what could be in there! And I’m not trying to get busted for something!” He responds back telling me I’m a smart girl.

Uhhh? Thanks? Not my coke and crack rocks, I’m just trying to get to my vacation.

Finally we are making our way to our gate to hand out. Annnnd of course there’s one of those little electric walkways on the floor.

Let’s just say dad took full advantage of poking along on that, laughing at his snailing speed while I’m standing at the end waiting for him.

We’re at our gate patiently waiting dad is asking about our plane and commenting on other planes while seeming highly intrigued. I was fascinated. Dad seeming to be interested in something?!

Finally it’s time to board up and continue onwards with the journey. We have our passes scanned and then we were standing on the jet bridge for what felt like an eternity freezing to death. We finally get to our seats and dad sits down looking disapprovingly at me and the seats. I just laughed because I knew before we left he’d hate the seats. I chose frontier because they are the home of low fares done right! Or something of that nature...

But anyways, we’re packed in like little sardines riding with Cloe the deer fawn. The entire plane is rocking back and fourth while we’re just sitting there waiting for everyone to get in. Literally the most nauseating feeling was taking over me from the shaking. Dads response? “Imagine taking a cruise and feeling that the whole time!” Thanks dad... I’m feeling much better after that.. hahaha.

Time for take off. FINALLY!!!!

Talk about terrifying... I think I peed a little. That’s no joke. The wind was AWFUL!!! I didn’t think we were going to make it into the air. I was thinking to myself, “great, now we’re going to lose a wing and bounce off the runway.”

Me to dad: “the wing is probably going to snap off and we’ll all die.” Dad: “naw, I’m too ornery to die.” Okay dad, whatever you say.

The flight was pretty smooth, dad and I had some snacks and an in flight nap up until the landing. She was pretty rough too but we made it into Jacksonville just in time for it to finish raining!

We picked up our rental car which was hellish. They were packed and had no cars. We waited about 20 minutes before dad started getting crabby that we were going to waste our entire day waiting for a car. So I told the lady that we needed a car ASAP because we had reservations, we didn’t, but we got a car. NO TIME FOR A CRABBY DAD OR IT WILL BE A LONG TWO DAYS!!

I set up the GPS to head to lunch and of course dad immediately realized we weren’t headed the right direction... dad: “I thought this joint was between Jacksonville and savannah?!” Me: “no, I told you it was in Jacksonville.”

Thankfully any crisis was averted there due to the fact this restaurant has 4.7 stars with over 2k reviews. It was called safe harbor and it was delish!

Dad knew before we even got there that he wanted a grilled shrimp basket. As for me, I had no clue, but I went to the classic fried fish. We also decided to split an order of gator tail.

I’m weak. I love gator. I thought for sure dad would be hesitant but he was actually the one who asked if I was wanting to try it from there. A restaurant with locally sourced/caught seafood? Of course I’m eating gator.

No regrets. The gator was AMAZING! Dad said it was “really good” and for any of you who know my dad, that’s a rare thing to hear. He did also enjoy his shrimp basket. So I dodged a bullet and was able to wipe the sweat from my brow this go.

After we finished up lunch we took a quick walk through the area before having to sit for another two hours to get to Savannah!

It’s a straight shot from Jacksonville to Savannah on I95 so we’re about mid way there when all of a sudden dad yells “DID YOU SHIT!?!” Guys, I seriously about died laughing. It hadn’t quite hit me and I was like “oh my god! No! DID YOU!?!” We’re both dying in the car from this putrid stench that came out of nowhere and assaulted your nostrils like they owed some serious cash. Dad: “smells like Nekoosa in the middle of August! NASTY!!”

I’m laughing just thinking about it. It was disgusting but gold. Thanks for automatically assuming it was me, dad.

We are finally approaching one of the joints I put on my list to stop at with dad. It was called “peach world”. Dad likes peaches so it seemed appropriate. It was just a small roadside shack full of peach related items. Salsa, jelly, tea, brittle, you name it I’m sure it was in there.

Dad found us some peach bread and the lady gave us a sample of a peach cider slushie. Needless to say we ended up with two peach slushies.

We paid and went back to the car and dad says “this better be the best damn peach bread I’ve ever had for that kind of money!!!” Me: “then why’d you buy it? There was a sign on the table with a price.” Dad: “WHAT! I DIDNT SEE IT! HOW MUCH WAS IT!?!” Me: “11.99”

I couldn’t help but laugh. It is good bread, but definitely not quite worth that price.

We finally finished up our trip and got to our Air BnB here in Savannah, and we’ve just been hanging out here until tomorrow morning since it’s Sunday in the south.

Hopefully tomorrow’s excursions will be a little more exciting.

[this-brownie]

04.03.20

not feeling super inspired right now to talk about anything so ill talk about my past birthdays. when I was younger, the apartment I used to live in was filled with not only Bengalis but children that were mine and my brothers’ age. we always had people to play with whether that was going to the park, going to each others houses, or simply playing on our block or backyard. we also always celebrated our birthdays together— I remember the first time I had my very first Big Mac was during my 9th birthday. in middle school, the birthdays got a little more sophisticated because we would go out to Thai restaurants instead of mcdonalds. in 8th grade, my family moved to a new house, a block away from the old apartment. the next year we all started attending different high schools and I don't rmmbr much, my feelings from the day at all except that we called it early that night and my mom and I slept on the living room sofa, lights off and everything. two of my neighbors came over to my house expecting that we were gonna go out to eat— i opened the door to see them dressed up and all they saw were me in my pjs, house dark and their faces fell. one of them said ‘we always do something for your birthday, we thought we were going to do something this year’ and I said no..not this year and kind of awkwardly sent them on their way. side note, I didnt really have social skills because I was extremely shy and super uncomfortable about being confrontational. 

the next few years in highschool my birthdays were okay—I had more School friends to celebrate with and we always went out to eat. but I never had the money or enough friends to have a huge bash like the way I always fantasized. I rmmbr in 10th grade, a few of my friends pitched in to buy me balloons and delivered them to me before first period— I had to carry them around all day and I felt embarrassed but also incredibly special and happy. I eventually became close with Fariha and we spent the next two birthdays together, always Thai food--Jen joined me for one of those outings— Fariha always took care of my bill but I realized I never extended the same courtesy to her. 

a certain pattern started developing over the years— my mom started picking fights with me and would always have me feelings miserable on the day of or very near my birthday. In 12th grade, we had a massive fight that I wasn't expecting her to remember it was my birthday or do anything about it. but near the end of the night she designed the living room with tea lights and bought me cake and dressed me up in a beautiful sari. looking back, its fucking manipulative to put me in a bad mood on a special day, and then expect those feelings to be wiped just because im presented with gifts. yes I was *eventually* showered with love but at the cost of feeling gaslighted and having to hide my negative emotions because they were considered disrespectful. my next birthday, I turned 18 but I can't rmmbr it at all. for my 19th, I was living in Toronto but I had visited Levi in Boston and for the first time ever I spent an entire week with him. I had recently gotten a credit card so I decided to buy myself expensive lingerie. that was a lot of fun.

my 20th birthday was one of the worst because I remember it had been a few months since I moved back from Toronto and my mom was especially untrusting. she completely disregarded that it was my birthday so that was a very lovely day. I remember I was working at magnolia that day but I can't rmmbr why I didnt go out with my friends…I don't rmmbr but it was a shitty day.

for my 21st, I had already been living in Boston for a little less than a year and Levi insisted I go out with my friends since I always stay in with him, I went out with two girls from the restaurant I used to work at, and another girl who I used t work at bebe with. regina (bebe) and I arrived earl/on time and decided to grab something to eat while we waited for the other two girls. we went to a Chinese hotpot place and it was a lot of fun trying something new to eat. the other two girls came and we went to a hookah place which was kind of ratchet but I remember my mindset at the time was to not plan everything out so meticulously because nothing goes to plan. however, I was TOO flowy because I was underdressed (it was fucking freezing that day) and the wait line for the hookah place without a reservation was ridiculous. I also didnt like the fact that the girls didnt dress up to the 9s like the way I did. they also didnt drink the vodka I snuck in so that was another bummer. the last annoying thing was that regina had to leave early because she used to Dorm, and the campus closed at a certain hour. even though I had more fun than usual, it wasn't the huge birthday bash one expects for their 21st.

the next year, 2015 at this point, I had moved back to New York but I can't rmmbr what I did that year. the next birthday was one of my favorites. I had finally planned out and executed an amazing girls night out. the day started off with me picking up a delicious tiramisu cake from a local bakery and heading over to nadiyas house in Astoria where Jenifer and Syndee also joined. we pregamed while getting ready. the dress code was black only— I had gotten an amazing sheer black maxi dress imprinted with gold stars from urban outfitters. all my girls looked amazing that night. we did our makeup and curled hair and even just getting ready was such fun. nadiya also put out snacks for us which was super cute. our first stop of the night was dinner at “beauty and Essex” where we had tapas like: tomato soup with a block of fried cheese in it; bone marrow with grilled bread, mini tuna tartare tacos, and shots of soup. the place was fucking fancy— they served us champagne in the ladies room, so extra haha. I knew the bill would be expensive so I covered a good portion of it which I didnt mind because I wanted to have FUN without being hindered at all. it was also a good amount of food where we were satisfied, but not too full that we felt bloated or couldn't continue drinking. we took an uber to the next stop to a placed called “beauty bar” which was a nail salon mixed with a club, that also served drinks. we each got ourselves a manicure and a drink. we danced for a little bit but didnt love the music so headed over to our last stop of the night, a nightclub called Cielo. this is where I made a mistake — I got us there a little after 11 and had to pay a $30 fee. if we had gotten there before 11pm, it would have been half the price. I remember sneaking a bottle of wine in, by squeezing it between my thighs, but it ended up being such a waste because we didnt have a bottle opener to even open it with. I ended up leaving it in the bathroom.  second thing wasn't really a mistake but it took points off from the overall day— the thing about nyc clubs is that there is SO many that they have to be different to stand out, meaning they don't play popular music or top 40. they will play what they think is cool. when you're drunk its fine, but if you're sober (like jen was), its less enjoyable. however because I was super drunk, I did enjoy dancing even tho I didnt act totally ratchet. maybe it worked out haha. I also met a very charming and handsome man that night. apparently he checked me out the minute he looked at me (according to Jen) and came up to me and…I can't rmmbr now what he asked but he offered to buy me a drink and I jokingly said back “haha I think my friends are going to be jealous if I drink without them” and then he actually bought me nadiya and Syndee drinks. I didnt expect that— afterwards we all split up and the girls danced with other people. I danced with this guy, whose name I don't even remember, but he was tall, genuine, and very charming. I met his friends and we went out for a smoke and I remember enjoying his company. I remember telling him I had a boyfriend and he will still ver pleasant and sweet, which I appreciated. afterwards us 4 girls and he, his friend and girlfriend all squished into this tiny car to grab pizza. it started raining heavy at that point and I was super drunk - on our way back to nadiyas place, we ended up having a sleepover that night, I dropped my phone into the water and it went blank. I felt horrible after because I never got the chance to thank him for the night— in his mind, I just became another girl that used him for drinks and then took flight. theres no way to change that unfortunately.

the issue with me is that I really want to execute the way I envision things, and when they don't turn out like that I become very unhappy. I started fantasizing, and still do sometimes, about having a perfect girls group thats made up of pretty girls of different ethnicities. for my next birthday I invited Syndee (Thai but can pass for Latina), Lilian (chinese), and a coworker of mine who I had never hung out with before (Mexican, but extremely pale- looks exotic white) to have a birthday brunch. this was the first time hanging out with Lilian after maybe 7-8 years so it was a bit of a reunion. we went out for drinks to a speakeasy after which was really cool too. even though the group of us looked beautiful in photos, the aesthetics of the restaurant was lovely, the food itself was amazing, and the drinks were strong-- the dynamic between all of us wasn't flowing 100%. I wanted so badly for things to look good that I didnt realize the coworker would feel out of place amongst the rest of us who had known each other for a while. so, while the day was nice and nothing bad had happened, it still didnt feel extremely memorable. thats the last time I hung out with that coworker, and the last time I tried to force things together to make them fit.

the next year I was pretty down about and around my birthday— this was the first birthday after being married. I remember Levi asking me what I wanted to do and what gift I wanted. im not super materialistic anymore so I don't like receiving gifts. we did go out to Indochine for dinner which was nice but not as great as it was the previous time we had gone. instead, we went out to see Jim Jeffereys in Madison sq garden. it was okay— he made a joke about taking a shit which lasted 15 minutes. it was annoying. also Levi got mad at me because I went out to get a drink and missed an entire segment. wooh. I am weird because I want people to show me a lot of love— it doesn't have to constant, or grand gestures but I like when its thoughtful. I hate having to ask for attention or affection, it makes it less special if I receive it after that. even though Jen is my best friend, I have celebrated most of my birthdays without her. she's usually unable to come see me during the school term. this year she was at med school and wasn't able to make it because she was busy studying. she's missed out on a lot of them and it hurts because not only is she my best friend and should do things to make me special, but that I always go out of my way for her to make her feel amazing on her day (I will make a separate post for HER  birthdays). I am relatively low key about my birthday too, ever since 10th grade it hasn't been on facebook profile. I don't tell people about it, if they ask for the date I try to evade their questions. I know its strange, but its because I don't like revealing personal info, or things that are meaningful to me, and have others disregard or forget them. most of my friends didnt remember to wish me but I don't hold it against them because I don't make their birthdays special. I only do that with Jen, so I only expect it from her. however, fimo did make me feel special. we went out to eat at a Sri Lankan restaurant and then got ice cream after from a different place. she printed me a cute celebratory card with a picture of me on it and got a beautiful vase (I told her not to get me anything tho!). she gave me black and white triangular shaped earrings and said, I noticed you like geometrical shapes so I thought you would like these (I did like them a lot). she also did something very sweet and unique- she cut out scraps of paper and wrote little compliments and inside jokes we shared on the. that was my favorite because it showed that there are little moments of me that she remembers, and that she has taken time to think of me and what would make me happy. 

out of all my birthdays, the last one where I turned 26 has been my favorite. im not always moody and a downer! this was one of the first birthdays that I actually DID get to spend with Jen. I become very moody around my birthday- in the past because my mom would pick fights with me..these days because I prefer to isolate myself rather than be happy, or optimistic, and then be disappointed. I would want someone to do for me what I do for them. is that selfish of me? maybe. which is why I like to keep my expectations extremely low. Jen had recently broken up with her boyfriend of a long time and she was actually available to come see me, without being hindered or guilted into spending a part of the weekend with him. she asked what I wanted to do and if I wanted anything for my birthday. I feel embarrassed and shy about being given gifts so I always say no to that— I like to have special experiences instead. I gave her an ambivalent answer, showing my hesitation and hinting that ill be working and ill be pretty busy that weekend. the reason I do this is because 1. im manipulative and 2. I'm an asshole. id rather exaggerate to her and make it seem like *IM* the one whose busy and can't make time for her, rather than have her say yes and hope that she's coming and be let down if she can't make it (which has happened in the past before). I also am…apparently unsatisfied by how people show me love. im a scorpio… meaning I am excessive, intense, and “relentless” (according to levi). when I do something, I do it big and I try my best to make it perfect. when people are very lax, like the way Jen is, about certain things it conveys to me that they are not as serious about me. its not necessarily true but thats how I feel. so I tell her im busy, to test her and see whether she will still come to see me for my birthday even tho it may be inconvenient for her. I was wishy washy, but I wasn't completely adamant about her not coming so she decided to ignore my hesitance and come anyway. good decision.

several days before my mom hinted that she would throw a surprise party for me— she tried to be clever about it, in her defense, but when she asked me for fimos number I knew something was up. I played along— I found it very endearing that my mom would do something like this for me. this was part of the reason I decided Jen should come anyway, it would be more fun with her there after all. she came Friday night and we had dinner and talked for a little bit before heading to bed. I had work the next morning; after I came come we both got ready to go to my moms place. she made it seem like we were going to a wedding so I had to get there, get dressed and then we would all head out together. I knew it was gonna be a party so I tried to get Levi to come but he didn't think it was appropriate. once we got there and opened the curtains, I was greeted loudly with “HAPPY BIRTHDAYYYY!!!” it was my two brothers, a couple of my little brothers friends, fimo and her bf, my aunt, and my cousin and his parents. it was very sweet, I was honestly touched to see a room of happy faces all leathered around because of me. my mom was elated, it was so fucking cute. she spent all day cooking a ton of food— making all my favorites ofc— and got this delicious cake adorned with a picture of me. the room was designed with HBD banners and streamers, confetti balloons, and pretty fairy lights. my brothers even got a disco light that displayed different colored lights all over the walls, and champagne candles (the ones that shoot out that pretend fire until they die out). I felt so fucking loved— I feel happy right now thinking back to that night. 

the next morning I had planned to go to the spa with just Levi but Jenifer wanted to join us. I didnt want to at first because I wanted to spend some alone time, but thankfully it ended up being a great time. Levi rented a car and we drove to this luxe spa in New Jersey. it was three floors filled with different temperature jacuzzis, pools, saunas, and steam rooms. the pool on the rooftop was an infinity pool, filled with a ton of instagrammers, but the view was stunning and we caught a delightful sunset. Jenifer being there added a lot to my pleasure and peace— I got to take as many photos as I wanted without being judged and I had fun running around to all the different areas instead of being told to sit quiet. I really do love that girl, but any actions of me being distant or cold are a result of being let down so many times, intentional or not, that I always expect only the worst now. however, her being there that weekend solidified our bond greatly and I appreciated that. we got pizza afterwards which was tasty but not so great. we drove back home and Levi let us off at st marks so that Jen and I could spend the last hour before she had to leave back to Philly. she spontaneously told me she wanted to get a belly piercing, and if I was down. we had gotten one together a long time ago but it fell out and we didnt have it re pierced. I didnt care either way so I went for it. now we have matching bffl belly rings all over again. nice end to a great weekend.

a few days later I met fimo for brunch at an Italian place in Brooklyn, that happened to be near the movie theaters where we planned on going after. brunch was whatever but she got me a fucking $100 Chanel perfume even though I demanded that she not get me anything. the perfume smells heavenly, and I only wear it on special occasions now. but it was too expensive, and I really didnt want that from her. later, we watched ‘Parasite’ at this theatre called Nitehawk Cinema which allows you to eat and drink right while you're watching the movie. we munched on popcorn and drank wine and felt like badasses. Parasite was absolutely amazing and thrilling- a Korean horror/thriller about a family that trick, and uses, a richer family into employing them. the name of the movie makes it seem like THEY are the parasites, but the crazy plot twist is that the rich family’s former employees were doing the same thing. but worse. they were secretly living/hiding out in the rich family basement/bunker. shit gets crazy when current employees find the ex employees. we both really enjoyed the movie, and didnt expect to like it as much as we did. it got nominated for several awards, so we were not the only ones who thought so.

the last person I saw for my birthday was Syndee but it wasn't really a bday hangout. I recently had a falling out with Ivan (more on that on a different post), and had reached out to all my closest friends. Sydnee and I see each other once every couple months so it was time. we got Detroit style pizza at this famous place near my work/home. the food was pretty good and it was nice to catch up with her. I let her know that I would be less busy in the future and that maybe we should start calling each other so that the stretches in person wouldn't feel as long. she agreed, and it was interesting as were catching up that for the first time I had only good news to share and she had not so good news. I told her that I had gotten a new job where I was planning to get promoted, had very recently gotten my green card, and that my mom was finally coming to terms with my marriage. I talked about my birthday, and she casually got the date for my birthday wrong (she was off by two days)— so I guess it really has been a while since we've been thorough with each other. she lamented about having to move out soon from her apt because she and her bf (who pays most of the rent) might be splitting up. she also said she wasn't doing as well at her new job as she had hoped. It was unfortunate that she was going through a tough time but I told her that she wasn't completely helpless, and that she still had options. its difficult for me to hear about people going through a tough time because I want to be able to change that, even if im not always in the position to do so. we did end on a good note and she seemed happy about seeing me which was nice. I am happy and grateful for the friends and the freedom I have. they don't always show me affection in the way I want but they do show it how they can, which I acknowledge and cherish.

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

Real feel: mother fucking wear your gloves!!

So 36 cars all sweept in most with red Xs

19 cars altogether got pulled over

2 cars got arrested I saw one being towed away. Almost 3 did but he self soothed himself and calmed down.

My dad (uncle) came and every car left in the parking lot took off in flight.

Denise the clone also came. She can't jump stsrt a car so she expected me to wait for her then wait for a tow truck and my dad knew we were gonna get in a fight cause ita too dam cold for that and she's on her rape cycle and I refuse to get in a car with her. Because it's annoying and I don't want her feeling satisfied she can breathe the same air as me.

It's 5 minutes, 10 at most to jump. 45 minutes to wait for a man and its like 20 minutes to the store.

And i learned how to jump start without lighting the cables on fire, now. Lucas says "oh please! That's the best way!" But not really. It doesn't actually work...

I have no circulation... So I was ice cold in like 10 minutes. So it would had warmed me, tho.

But yeah dad pulls in and suddenly everyone acts like they're escaping jail.

.... I know i should just went in and stared at that super hottt clone hottie that was super super hot and stocking water... But that IS kinda creepy even if he is Just a clone... I was all driving by in my Wal-Mart wheelchair cart and I was all whoa... Is he..? Wait i gotta see l.. Because he squatted down with his hot warm balls beneath him and so I was all lets stop right here in the middle of life and discuss what's on our shopping list until he comes up from behind the pallet...

"Oh my God. Now i see why I was so in love with you William" while my heart literally leaps from my chest bounces back and goes out of rhythem while pounding through 2 shirts.

So then we laughed at my reaction for half hour

Dam he was rugged and hot...

One time I picked up William early for work and I seen him and he ducked behind some concrete shelving used to block off the street from traffic...

And oh my God...

I was walking and I seen him and I was all "oh does he loo--" and he looked at me, i swear and ducked and so i was all "well I'm gonna go see. I don't think William will mind.. Its not like i totally think hes sexy but he might be... I'll just go see... Is it William..?"

Because he was waaaay sexier at work than home... Like there it's all comfy and fun and sexy but this was outside and he looked all sparkly and God like like yum

Now he claims he saw me and saw "a woman on the prowl way too sexy to be at the job site for any work related reason" so to be safe from a kidnapping situation he decided to hide

And hide he did

I leaned over to peek and he kept hiding and hiding and asked some guys at the truck "is she gone?"

"No"

One asked "why are you hiding from your wife?"

"Man! I got one at home! Well i am engaged. Man is she crazy? Does she look it?! Fuck man! Im gonna be so busted! I need to get home! I can't get kidnapped! Fuck this!"

And my eyes got real wide and the guy at the truck just shrugged cause i was all what do i do?!?!

So i kinda jumped and leaned over real far over the cement shelving. "Well HI!!"

I was gonna ask him if he thought i was a psycho bitch then to my face but i slid on the plastic and unfortunately I was wearing a shorter dress than usual.

So he stood up "ma'am I'm just checking the paperwork ill be right back" and ducked again.

"Baby! Uh hi! Baby I don't want to yell but I think i just showed everyone my thong!!"

"What?! Okay i have to finish the uhh paperwork. Man my wife ain't even here shes at home finishing up supper or something"

"Uhm baby! There's a lot of men here which one do you want me to go home with?!"

"Uh any!! Just not me!!"

Mind you everyone is looking at me and him and listening. This is outta control and m6 husband does not say that shit to me, i tried being solid now it was fight time. So i leaned over the other end of the cement wall he loved more than me and lowered my voice "hey psst yeah. Psst William man that crazy bitch is gone now. Jump in the truck and we will take you home!!"

"Really?!?!" He lowered the clipboard he hid behind. "Oh... No.., see.., no i got a ride already!"

"Yeah with me you dumb goon"

"No in here see!" And he jumped in the back of the truck. "I finished the paperwork. Alright let's go!"

So i started to walk over and he jumped way far back in the truck

"Can you please help me? Are you the one i called?" I asked the guy laughing painfully through the whole ordeal.

He looked me up and down real hard "you sure you dont want me to take yoh home?!"

"Am i even at the right construction site?!?!"

"Yes you are. Here hand him this piece of paper." Then he yelled over "HEY WILL she called a little before lunch and left a note and asked if it was alright if she came up and surprised you and i said yeah.. I didn't know you would go a little crazy..."

"She ain't my wife!! Shes too sexy!"

"WHAT??? IM GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!!! IM FUCKING COMING UP THERE YOU BETTER GET DOWN!"

"No fuck you bi-atch!!! Wait... Honey? Is that you? I recognize your fingernail because you smashed it the other day"

"Oh it's alright. Just come down" i pleaded.

"With the hammer..." He began walking towards me "let me see it" he looked at it. "Miiiiike if you ever do that again I'm beating the shit out of you." And he sat at the end of the tail gate "well i already got a ride home, with him."

"Okay fine"

"Wait let me see what you have in your hand. These are our keys!! These are mine you're not having them and not allowed in my house Like that... Dressed like a... A... Skank!!"

"Well what do you want me to do? Stay here and get gang raped?!"

"Jesus Christ okay babe prove to me you're my wife"

"Okay fine but don't tell me your sorry" i went around the truck and took off my panties wadded them up and stuffed them in his hand "they're your favorite"

"Yeah but everyone knows that!"

"Who do you tell? Who the fuck do you tell about your favorite panties?!" Like im beyond mad. And I am yelling.

"Yeah well where did you get that dress?! Whose money did you use to buy it??! Hmm?"

"Ive had enough of me" i tried to get MY csr keys back and he wouldn't let me take them "being mother fucking nice to you" he was stronger than me So i tried to armpit trick

"Fuck you being mean to me! Come here!"

"You'll tear my dress! No! My shoe!"

"I think she's really upset at me. I think I've upset her" I bent to fix my shoe and my dress didn't cover ... Anything... Back there. "Hey quit it will you?!"

"Just give me back the key to my car and keep every thing else. Fuck it. Im tired of you anyway. I cook i clean and i come to surprise you and this is what i get and I REFUSE TO CRY HERE IN FRONT OF EVERYONE SO GIVE ME BACK MY SHIT!!!" and i threw the paperwork in his face and busted his nose.

"I,understand you're my baby but did you need to hit me in the face and make my nose bleed?" He said calmly snd slowly

"Youre not bleeding, oh yeah you are. Use the panties"

So this bastard stands up in the back of the truck with my panties to his face and says "Hey Everyone, I'd Like You To Meet My Wife!"

"We've seen a whole lot of her already"

I turn around and there's not 5 or 6 guys anymore. There's 30.

"Oh shit" and I pull my dress down. "Can we just leave?! Please?!?"

"Yeah!! Lets go!!"

So he picked me up and rushes to the car with me and a bunch of dudes come around the corner and i tell him to put me down cause I can feel his hand on my bare ass.

So hes all "goddang it why did you dress so sultry?!"

"For my husband!!! who is apparently a God dang Ass Hole!!!!!!! when hes at work!!"

"Oh honey i didn't mean anything by---"

"Come on let's go!!!" As we rush around the corner there's like 50 construction workers staring hard. "I am never doing this again!!"

"Why?!"

"Hurry and please open the door!!" He reached across and unlocked it

I covered my face with my hands "oh my god oh no you're insane!"

"What? What are you saying to me?!"

"Don't you know you have PTSD? Male trauma? Because I Didnt!!"

"Well yeah I was kidnapped when i was like five!!"

"But you didn't even know me!?!"

"You never wear makeup and not dresses that short!"

"I do all the time!! I walk around partially naked all the time!!!" I looked at traffic "its just the lipstick here let me wipe it off"

"Thats better you could did that at the construction site!"

"Well i just put it back on in the car and I didn't know that's why you were freaking out and going insane on me!!"

"Put it back on?! Why the Hell?!

"I ate a biscuit"

"Why did you put it on in the first place?"

"Have you seen in my caboodle? I have a ton of it! When you get home, look!!"

"Okay alright i will"

"Where are we going? I thought we would go to Tulsa"

"Not now! I gotta go home to make sure you are --- you!!! Now come on!!

"You're the one driving"

"Its my car!!"

"No! Its mine and my dad's see the registration?!?!"

"That's it I'm gonna pull over. Let me see the mole that's on your thigh"

"Its not a mole! Its a freckle!"

"Fine let me see it And you drive!!"

"Okay Okay fine I'll let you see it"

He looks "ok you're you then!"

"Who else would i be?!?"

"A clone!"

"From the freezer?!? Come on! Not me! Let me drice then!"

"You're losing your cool and you never do!"

"Omg Jesus Christ are you kidding me?!?"

"Uhm no"

"I need to start smoking pot. We need to get our own place and we do then this happens."

"Smoking pot?! Uhm no! I do not think so! Here you drive then!! You're a nervous wreck. You need control"

"No i need sex but my husband is INSANE!! I try a nice surprise to be unspoiled and then this happens!"

"Who calls you spoiled?!"

"YOU DO!!"

"Jesus Christ! Do you want a hotel?!"

"What?! No we got dishes at home. They will get me unstressed"

"HON-EY!"

"I'm getting in the back seat PULL OVER!!"

"Now I'm talking! You think i want you to come all this way to go home?"

"BACKSEAT!!!"

As soon as the back Windows fogged a truck of his co-workers drove by honking.

When we finished he said

"We are going home because you NEVER do that to Me!!"

"It was a surprise!! And no im not driving! Im staying in the back seat!"

"You NEVER do that to Me either!!!"

"Well it's a surprise!!!"

I wanna cry he upset me so much so I'm,all screaming from my throat and it sounds all shrill and out of control and hes like trying to calm me down and I don't want to be upset and feeling like life is out of control but he really showed me shit i hadn't seen and I was scared to be at home because what was next? I used a different sauce because I was pregnant and so he throws me out into the street? Barefoot and all because i look different? So i just cried myself to sleep in the back seat of my own car because I didn't know what else to do and it was the only thing i could accomplish that day,

I heard the car door open and close...

He didn't go around the other side to open and get me out... It was dark and cold already.

"There's no one upstairs. Now what do you want to do?" He sat in the car

"I'll just go to my parents. I'll come get my clothes later"

So he yanked open the car door, jumped out, threw the seat forward, yanked me out of the car, threw me over his shoulder, put his hand over my bare ass and carried me up 3 flights of stairs.

Put me in the single comfy chair we had and made dinner.

He sat on a pillow on the floor next to me and fed me.

"What are we going to do if i get pregnant and my body starts to change?"

"Ill just take pictures. I'll use my Polaroid"

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I had found out I wss pregnant that morning... Feeling sick like crazy... I took a test in the gas station bathroom. Wrapped it in my purse and went and bought a new dress and shoes and went home, took a bath did my hair and thought I had the whole day still so i should go surprise him at work and go out in Tulsa and make it special... Not days later after the whole town had to come over and seperate us from fighting cause I'm kinda crazy pregnant... And after 2 weeks of couple's therapy and he says "oh baby you're sick a lot i think you may be pregnant. You think?"

"Oh yeah i am. Check my purse."

He did take me out to Tulsa... And I was a bit sad... Because we had been through a lot since that day.. And i wanted telling him to be really special... Turned out he was.

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I had taken Polaroid of myself that morning before i got dressed and one from the side and then one after. And wrote "oh!" "Baby!!" "Surprise!" And the date.

Cause I learned how to set the timer and take one of myself

So he went and got them abd said "okay im sorry i shouldn't yelled at you for taking naked Polaroids of your self. Now I see why you would take them. Okay?"

"I guess."

"DID I NOT APOLOGIZE RIGHT?!"

"MAYBE I DIDN'T YELL AT YOU RIGHT WHEN YOU YELLED AT ME!!"

He got up like he was fuming mad and circled me like a vulture i Put my arms up and he circled me 2x more then stopped in front of me and I put my hands on his neck

"Are we going to bed? Ill cook dinner after"

"Mmhmmm I'll help!"

[shanakook]

jungkook on flower crew pt.1