#but it was definitely a worry for this blog

[vy-canis-melodis]

the following is a blog post, written by tanja, in the Bird HRT universe:

UPDATE and a cancelled article!

Hi all, it's been a long time since my last blog post. Here's the deal; I was in hospital. Long story short, some things went pretty wrong, and here I am, having to deal with a huge backwards step in progress then having had to retrace those steps with additional gooey complications and therapy.

Anyway, here's a journalistic article I was pretty close to finishing and submitting to actual newspapers before everything went down and I had to cancel it.

Rejecting Humanity - Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Just Be Myself

As I write this, I'm sitting in the waiting room of a Hospital cross Research Laboratory in London. By the time you're reading this, I'll have been on my treatment journey for over a year. What treatment, you ask? Well, it's Humanity Removal Therapy. One year ago, I undertook a radical new procedure which slowly transforms you from human to another form. Perhaps you've seen strange creatures out and about; a snow leopard at the supermarket, a dog at the drive-thru, or a tuatara at the thrift shop. Or, perhaps, you haven't; as I write this, the number of patients might not yet have reached triple digits worldwide.

Perhaps I should introduce myself. My name is Tanja ------, and I am an Iberian Azure-winged Magpie, scientific name 'cyanopica cooki'. One year ago, I was fully human, and now I look like a hybrid between our two species. So, let me guide you through my world.

How is this possible?

A little over a year ago, certain medical circles revealed that species transformation had been trialled in mice, turning them into various other creatures, with various success rates from 20 to 80% depending on size and how different the target species was. Now, I'm not for animal testing, but when I heard that human trials were going to open, I kept that pinned to my calendar. And so, after a few months, I was able to finally sign up and have my first interview. Which was… short. Turns out, they had pretty elaborate ways of gatekeeping people who really meant that they wanted it from those that they thought would regret the procedures. They also had a little joke, based on gender HRT, where they would ask if you'd spent years living as your preferred species beforehand. Or at least, I think it was a joke. And then, I was on my way to becoming the bird I love.

How much did it cost?

Well, luckily for me, the NHS provides free healthcare. Then, due to this being a clinical trial, I get paid for being a test subject. Then, due to the effects of the medicine, I receive Disability Benefits. The treatment itself is… a bit of a legal loophole, really. This very article may well be the first you've heard of it.

Is it just a magic pill?

Nope! It's a mix of CRISPR, gene replacement, hormone injections, and surgeries over time. It's a real mishmash, at least in my case. For example, keratinous structures can be grown through selective DNA editing and hormones that stimulate 'hair' growth in specific areas in specific ways. Bone structure can also slowly be altered in some cases through gene replacement, though in some cases, surgery is needed. My back, for example, will soon be undergoing surgery to adjust the way the vertebrae are laid out. Some aspects just are too difficult to be done naturally, and so artificial parts and prosthetics are added. But this complicated procedure has an upside - it means that there is more customisation possible! For example, a Harpy would be a very specific set of applications of Bird HRT that exclude certain aspects such as the face!

Are there downsides?

Definitely. There's the immunosuppression that has to occur to stop new parts from being rejected. There's the high risk of cancers and other diseases to occur as a result of this procedure. There's just the risk that your organs will fail. Most of this is irreversible too.

Why even do it then?

Because, to that small number of people, it's so worth it. This is a new life, an opportunity to discard that uncomfortable human vessel and be yourself at last. For the vast majority of people, being oneself is being human, but that's not the case for everyone.

Is it going to be banned?

Well, that's hard to say. Governments worldwide are, I'm sure, now aware of this phenomenon. And I think it presents a threat to the status quo. This is something new, something scary, something intimidating, that shifts the power balance between subjects and governers. And it's not just because some people have become huge fire-breathing dragons - it's the meaning behind it. They've rejected the very notion of the social contract between humans and crafted a new identity. Do we still count as people? And that's really the question, isn't it. So much of the way government and society works is to split people into groups of those that are 'more' people, and those that are 'lesser' people - and that dictates what societal violences are permissible, for example. This whole new procedure will have to make governments rethink so much, and it can either be a source of worry for us, or a source of hope for everyone. We just have to be loud enough to be heard for who we are.

So what will come next? Well, I'm going to hop on in to my next appointment, and the Earth will keep spinning. My first set of wings has almost reached full-span, and my toe-dexterity is almost at where I was with hands as a human. With my next set of primaries, I may have enough of a wingspan to fly, if I keep my weight low enough. Meanwhile, Parliament will likely have a debate on the issue, as a petition to legalise the procedure has a few thousand signatures on the government's official petition website. I'll be waiting on that result eagerly.

If you have any other questions, I'd be more than willing to answer them!

[wsdanon]

hello everyone I made a little poll about this wip on my alt blog, so here it is \o/!! fic for some of the shotgunners (Matt, Felps, Guaxi) except I don’t feel like I’ve watched enough to write about this confrontation + resolution correctly, so just take this little lead up thing I wrote because I really wanted to write something for them…

reblogs appreciated, hope you enjoy \o/!!

Well, Felps is now stuck between a rock and a hard place. Although using rock to describe the demon pathetically clinging to his arm—who made himself smaller just so he could stare up at Felps with wide eyes—doesn’t seem entirely accurate. But it is working. Even if it makes it a little hard to see what he’s signing. 

“Matt…” Felps sighs. How to put this? “I want to stay on good terms with Guaxinim.” 

“It’ll be fine!” Matt insists. “You two have already fought, right? Just say it’s a misunderstanding similar to that if it goes wrong.” 

“He might be too paranoid for that, you know?”

“But we’ve already all investigated together and he was fine then! It doesn’t need to be anything big—just, you know, that you trust me.” Matt pauses, seeming to consider something. “And… maybe that you don’t think people will think badly of him for talking with a demon?”

“Ah, Matt… you’re pushing it a little, yeah?” Felps sighs. “But, fine. I’ll see what I can do.”

“Thank you!” 

Matt uncurls himself and throws his arms around Felps in a tight hug. Honestly—he is taller than Felps. That crouched position to make himself look smaller couldn’t have been very comfortable for long. Or maybe it’s fine for demons—he doesn’t know. 

Out of Felps and Guaxinim it’s almost funny that it’s shaken out like this. But he’s never been a very good Saint. Does Matt appreciate the irony, too? 

“Okay, okay.” He hugs Matt a little tighter before trying to pull away. For a moment—he doesn’t think Matt is going to let him. “I’ll go talk to him now. But don’t expect it to work, okay?”

“Of course.” Matt smiles—and how can Guaxinim say with so much confidence that the man in front of him is ugly? It’s certainly not true. Not in Felps’ opinion, at least. “Thank you for trying, though.” 

“Of course, of course, it’s no problem.”

He does… sort of trust Matt. Compared to everyone else on the island that isn’t in their group, he could even say he trusts Matt the most. If someone suggested he be added to their chat, Felps wouldn’t argue. They are already kind of investigating with him, anyway. 

He has no idea what’s going on with Matt and Bagi, but maybe if this thing with Xinim and Matt smoothes over he will get an invite. If Meiaum has any reservations about it Felps is sure he’ll easily be able to convince those away. 

With another thank you, and a goodbye, Matt runs off. Leaving Felps with the mammoth task of somehow convincing Guaxinim to be less harsh with Matt. 

“Where are you?” He messages Guaxi. “I want to talk.”

Guaxinim sends his location. With a belated, “Everything okay?” 

“Just have some information.” Felps replies. 

Then he plugs the coordinates into his map and stops focusing on messaging in favour of getting there as quick as possible. It’s starting to turn night, and Felps doesn’t want to deal with the myriad of monsters that will shortly appear. At least he seems close. 

He has no idea how he’s going to do this. Guaxinim worries too much. Or maybe not too much—just… too explosively. After all, Felps is fairly certain he does like Matt, he just… doesn’t want to be seen with him?

With every passing day back on this earth he understands the people on it less and less. 

At least the chaos they create is entertaining, but it does beg the question—should Felps reveal what he is? Will that calm Guaxinim’s mind? He really didn’t want anyone to know, but maybe…?

Matt knows. Matt definitely knows. The first time they met Matt had looked at him like he could see more—like he could see the haze Felps himself sees when he looks in mirrors—red eyes wide and glittering with wonder as he called him Saint Felps after Felps had introduced himself. 

And that’s already one person more than he would like to know. 

But if Guaxinim is worried about Matt’s demon status reflecting badly on him, he shouldn’t have to. As much as Felps isn’t good at being a Saint, Matt isn’t good at being a demon, either. Anyone on this island will easily see that. 

And somehow he has to convey that without revealing what he is. Because, no, thinking about it—two people knowing is quite enough, thank you. And Guaxinim has sold him out before… maybe. Felps is still unclear on the truth of that situation, but he’s willing to put it mostly behind him. 

Mostly. 

He doesn’t want this information getting out, and Guaxinim can’t be trusted with that right now. He’ll save it for if things really start going wrong. 

Guaxinim jumps out in front of him with a hello on his hands, and Felps barely notices the latter—too busy yelping and recovering from the fright. 

“Hey, Felps.” He repeats, smiling a little too much like he finds this funny. “You okay?”

“What a scare.” Felps lets his hands shake as he signs it, then he weakly pushes at Guaxinim. “For the love of god, Xinim, don’t do that!” 

“Hey, it’s not my fault, right?” Guaxinim complains. “You were too deep in thought—how else was I supposed to get your attention?”

And… Well, he’s right, but Felps isn’t going to admit that. 

“Listen…” Then he sighs, and looks around, and beckons Guaxinim a few steps to the left. “Come here, come here—it’s too exposed there.”

“Okay, okay.” Guaxinim signs as he follows after Felps with a laugh. 

Good. He doesn’t want this to come off like a serious conversation. 

…Even though they have been having serious conversations like this, too. But it at least adds some levity to the situation. 

———

this is about as far as I dare write with how little I currently know… hope you enjoyed though \o/!!

[gallusgalluss]

EVERY grungus

[backwardpuzzle]

some of my custom clangen cats ^^

[airanke]

This super tiny sprite turned out so nice!!! The saddest thing is that if you are primarily a mobile Tumblr user, you won't really ever see it on the blog itself - but I love it!!!

[fukuzawa-armeddaddyagency]

Hey dad i dont feel so good

What's wrong?

What doesn't feel good?

[iwaasfairy]

if you claim to understand and support dc and the way people process and deal w their trauma in safe ways,,, and then use it against victims to fight your little tumblr fights ,, you can suck my metaphorical dick that’s all I’m gonna say

[devilsskettle]

dinner in america is such a “take what you want from it and leave the rest” movie for me because i do think it’s very cute and i can buy into some of the wish fulfillment nature of the story but admittedly there are some parts that really don’t work for me, there are some parts that fall a little flat either in terms of the characters or humor, and the pacing is a bit of a challenge tbh. but it’s unbelievable what the human brain can overcome by virtue of simply Just Liking That Guy

[mel-loly]

Making you doing what you're doing then you're going to have to suffocate to hear yourself to some software and saying occasions I yourself set app For You that's off For You Better bye and following it'll happen NO EXCUSES if in spots of procrastination reasonable You are All In a relaunch or anything like a white there is no shit to cracker no worthlessness you're not being bubbled it's like it when I'm a man I'm being bothered if I can't next month Choose a side instant let's be a bone and I'm going to absolutely reply to this vote I'm gonna have to see if there are a plan to pull out a seat with a left hand choir I'm gonna get crammed up or if you're coming in that caramel or is that kind of Wet comes around and welcomes you're in Ghost room therefore I eagerly Wait your planWe're going to yell at our investigation we're sitting somewhere around behind me in the background let's help we'll shoot their victory show hotter and last to me that whole new clothes keep your clothes at all times mind if you're an old communion stands I'm not sure what's your opinion we'll continue to stand now alone a very gone and supersedes of returns and ifndividuals mine is a dominant air yours is there a tough 1 year or a quarter of all second of all it's equipped doing that you can't be lucky to boast it can't be your block of us you can't be both of us you cannot bear any person at best and you absolutely cannot beat internet percent in your hamburger you also surely sell can't be following or spetting out at a bullshit therapy therapy to hotter a blessed mate on the content to do with me mine see you's doing what you are doing it earlyI did opening the of course and that it's just often to hear yourself do someCompletely utterly irrelevant of a responsibility go back and bother and you can easily go back and debother it to redial the container into your good right cother a dirty overgun change or anti guitar it controls completely utterly as someone equation is that danger you are smart and intelligent and I continue to respect you too smart and intelligent no Hymes no excuses I've seen in the blood supercraft's name and reason not eat it all here they're gonna click 1 yeah 1 you know it's a brain cell's gonna give you and study the fucking teacher and you're getting you to go back and then we'll go back in and we'll be ready to get it all over again and teenager and to you get a right danger completely adeliyah'ssoftware and I encourage themselves to invite You that Drop through Bed by and following at all times the Excuses it's in Blood supercrashing English and all You are All In our lives all I Don't think like a white there isn't a tick we're Here no exercise no being bothered if like a one of them may end up being bothered if like an axe month Choose a side and stupid ass lastly of All That I've said is there a ton of policy with Teenagers like doing so at the internet we've come out we'rerant to come up and decorate or I'm back on that but it comes Down goes around what comes Down goes around therefore I eagerly Wait reply

Oh.. My buddy... Did you drink by chance..? Because I think you're not thinking very well...👀

[cosmicsnufkin]

for the record if you ever see me reblogging from a zionist or terf or anyone spewing anything racist or antisemitic or ableist, please just let me know i'm tired of finding out half a year too late

[bugeyedfreaks]

You don't like season 5?

Not really. Seasons 5 and 6 are the de facto Bad Seasons of the show. There’s a lot that’s off and doesn’t fit the weird (affectionate) and snappy vibe established in the first four seasons. There’s wonky pacing and timing, some boring or just really stupid stories, revised character designs that aren’t bad but are just kind of ugly and charmless (i.e. elf Mojo, I will never like that character design), the switch to digital made the animation and art feel less lively… and it’s mostly because many of the people who worked on those first four seasons started working on other projects. The show’s quality definitely suffered. I don’t ever really rewatch those ones because there are more than a few episodes (especially in Season 6) that are just flat out awful. It’s to a point where I don’t even regard most of what happened in those episodes as canon. 🤣

[your-fave-is-christian]

Kaladin from Stormlight by Brandon Sanderson

Kaladin from The Stormlight Archive is Christian!

[mermaidsirennikita]

I feel so bad when an author's book has been delayed for a long time and you finally get it and it feels like I'm reading writer's block. As a writer, I get it, but as a reader, it's a rough thing to get past.

[ask-the-royal-absol]

Destino: You know, perhaps you should give the spying on other Pokémon thing up? It wasn’t fun back then and it certainly isn’t fun now. I swear, everyone’s the same. No privacy anymore.

Mistress Mirage: And you’re lucky I didn’t spread your little secret around. Who knows what could happen to you if it got out. Perhaps they’d need someone new to rule, since the current heir to the throne is clearly not trustworthy.

Destino: And *you* think you could do any better? Ha! That’s the funniest thing you’ve said today! The Pokémon who has her minions watch my every move? The Pokémon who has to decide when I do things? The Pokémon who steals things from other Pokémon because, and I quote, “those other Pokémon didn’t need them as much as me.” Oh yeah, real great leader qualities. 10/10. Let me just hand my crown over right now.

Mistress Mirage: You know, I’m starting to loose my patience. If you have a reason as to why you’re actually here, you better tell me soon. If not, I’ll refuse to even consider listening to you. You voice is already getting on my nerves.

*Felix watches from a distance, floating in a sitting position. He grabs a bag of popcorn from an arm-sized portal he made and watches the fallout. How lucky he was he didn’t have to deal with this. He offers some to Rhith the Zorua who refuses.*

Felix: So, how long do ya think it’ll be until Destino finally asks her for help?

Rhith: I hope the Mistress kicks them out before that can even happen.

Felix: Wow, ya really do hate them, huh?

Rhith: Of course I do. They brought sadness to our Mistress. I can’t support Destino as our future ruler. As much as I actually quite like Queen Karma and King Nox as our rulers, can’t say I share the same sentiment for the Prime. And between you and me, I don’t think many Pokémon down here do.

Felix: Yeah, I’ve noticed that too. It’s a shame really. I do think they could be great in a rulin’ position. Destino has the charisma needed to win Pokémon over. They have the confidence to make sure things get done. But I do know they have a lotta bad qualities too. Some which even annoy me. They can be selfish, rude, demanding and egotistical. I’m honestly surprised I’ve stuck with Destino for this long.

Rhith: Why are you still friends with them then?

Felix: Because I can see how amazing Destino could be if they put a little effort into betterin’ themselves. Deep down inside of them is a Pokémon who cares about their subjects and would do anything to help out. I know it doesn’t seem like it but that Pokémon is in there somewhere. I mean, Destino actually does the responsibilities that the King and Queen have when they’re not here and I honestly think they enjoy it just a little.

Rhith: …I suppose.

Felix: Besides, I think my pal needs someone to stick by them when they’re off saving the world.

Rhith: Saving the world?

(2/5)

@ask-gizmo-and-vigil

[hwanghyunjinenthusiast]

I think I'm going to go on a hiatus of sorts for a bit. I'm sure you could all already tell I've been struggling with irl stuff coupled with fluctuations with my writing. Don't worry, it won't be permanent but, I think I need to focus on irl stuff for at least the next week or so. Also, I have been working on my fics for Kinkuary! Which I'm super excited about. That might be when I come back writing wise though since I'm trying to pour all of my energy into those fics. I'll likely still come online but, yeah, things have been really off for me lately and I think I need to put all of my energy into moving for now.

[some-teeth-in-a-trench-coat]

me reading relatable NPD posts coming across one about only showing kindness to not seem like a bad person: wait but kindness and compassion and selflessness come so naturally to me what do you mean you struggle with it? do I not have NPD after all?

my ?-8 year old self with anger issues whose entire idea of friendship is to convince people to give him attention and let him use their cool things with no desire to return the favor: uh

my 9-11 year old self still with anger issues but now having 0 friends and one attempted murder of another kid for the crime of not leaving the room because he said to: um

my 12-16 year old self actively homicidal sadistic and only not acting on those thoughts because he wants to be liked but many times trying out being cruel on separate accounts feeling no remorse for it: you sure?

my 17-20 year old self discovering that he can actually choose to be a good person indefinitely (the homicidal and sadistic thoughts don't have to be a ticking time bomb and are actually pretty easy to suppress) and carefully training himself to choose to be kind and hate the thought of hurting people and reprogramming his values to take pride in selflessness so that unnamed but observed NPD would reward such behavior: I think you forgot something

my (current) mid twenties self: hmm no I think I'm just really special and an exception to those symptoms or whatever sorry I think my NPD just makes me really cool instead <3