#but it not happening then to me was the death blow. like rory can never sever herself from the cultivated selfishness of that world

[roobylavender]

Thoughts on Jess Mariano?

i honestly have not rewatched gilmore girls in years so i have nothing particularly detailed to say but to me he was one of very few characters who were ultimately actually likable from start to finish, regardless of his flaws and mistakes which we can surely acknowledge were owed in large part to his upbringing and others’ classist treatment of him, and i’m glad the gilmore girls revival revival is dead in the water bc if i had to see jess parent rory’s kid i would go insane. in a bad way. he is in a good place in his life and he does not need to backtrack by getting back together with his high school sweetheart who is at this point selfish, without ambition, and prone to adultery

[saltygilmores]

Thoughts While Watching Gilmore Girls, 3x8, Let The Games Begin. Part 7 (It's Been A While)

Last chapter was posted May 11th. Apologies for the hiatus. The vibes need to be just right to create these things. You can read parts 1-6 and everything else in my pinned post. On the last episode of TWWGG: "After Lorelai (Rory) exits the (Yale) interview, one that was seemingly a success, she immediately turns to Richard to chew him out for springing the interview on her last minute and not giving her time to prepare. That is more than fair coming from Rory, to be quite honest. And I’m glad to see her standing up for herself." Lesss gooo. Lorelai hauls Rory into a cab. They arrive home at night, even though it was blazing sunshine a short distance away at Yale. Rory asks Lorelai if they can not talk about college for 2 days and she agrees and everything that just happened is brushed aside and forgotten. Kidding. After a brave display of defiance towards Richard moments earlier, Rorynow expresses her guilt for not towing the line for Mommy. Mommy was right. Mommy is always right.

I....you know...forget it.

I think I should cross off "Lorelai and Rory eat at Luke's without paying" from the Bingo Card. Bringing outside food into his establishment? That's just rude. Luke could probably send Jess to college with all of Rory and Lorelai's unpaid checks and stiffed tips.

Saying it outloud isn''t going to change their unethical and frankly downright criminal behavior, Lucas. You know this.

Or at least a bag of Doritos.

Why hello, my sweet baby darling. I'm ready to Cmhrrrh.

Oh, Is "studying" what the kids call tonsil hockey these days? Run like the wind Rory! RUNNNN. I just have this good feeling Rory is totally not going to blow this sacred opportunity to have unsupervised makeout time with Jess or anything like that. Never, in the kingdom of The Queen of Blue Balls. Lorelai and Luke watch as Rory runs after Jess to "Study". Wink wink nudge nudge. Then a few seconds later without a shred of irony or realization, Luke tells Lorelai how he told Jess that as long as he lives under his roof he's gotta keep his pants on.

You're off to a ripping start already.

Lorelai is being rational? She's not running after them? "It's okay"? She's pulling the "They're teenagers, they can kiss in the dark" shit for Jess and Rory like she did for Dean? I'd say "Fetch me my fainting couch" but I know it's all a big fat farce, Lorelai is full of shit as per uszh, and my fainting couch is in the shop.

Settle down, Lucas. You're going to have a stroke one of these days. Or steam is going to come out of his ears like in a cartoon. Or he'll snap and go on a killing spree.

I've never seen two grown adults who weren't in some kind of strict religious sect have such near anyeursms because their adult children want to kiss each other. What are the odds Luke Danes, the varsity athlete, was much sluttier than Jess when he was 18? Probably pretty high. Cross off "Do as I Say Not As I Do" on the Episode Bingo Card.

Pretty rich coming from Ms "Also Has Run Around All Over Town Looking for Jess and Rory" and "Ms. Run Around All Over Town Looking For a Gumball Machine Bracelet"

I can rely on Lorelai being insufferable in every episode, but when Luke is insufferable too I pray for the sweet relief of the end credits. I hope in his Cockblocking Quest of Glory, that he trips on something. Or loses his hat.

Smoking against a gas pump. Living dangerously. I don't blame him for having a bit of a death wish, to be quite honest. Luke should be more concerned that Jess is going to cause an explosion that will level Stars Hollow into a parking lot than him rounding first base. (Where the hell did Luke go, by the way?)

Whatcha thinkin aboutt?

That was such a good HUH. *pets his sweet head*

*gnaws on the drywall* SUCH A GOOD KISS. I have no words. Okay, That’s a lie, I do have words but I ran out of space so I will see you in part 8 for the thrilling conclusion (which is: Rory ruins this precious moment by abandoning Jess and chasing after Dean) Oh god. I just skipped ahead and there's a Lorelai Couch Speech at the end too. Mind if I join you for a cigarette against the gas pumps, Jess?

[besidesitstoowarm]

"Amy's Choice" thoughts

this is almost like a. midseason finale type episode? not plot-wise, i don't think dw ever does midseason finales the way walking dead does for example, but it very much addresses head-on the major source of inter-companion tension, that being amy's interest in the doctor and her neglect of rory. that said i love how it does end in amy making her choice BUT that's not the end of it. like it's not like this ties up that part of her arc in a bow, it continues through s7. amy pond character that you are

anyway i'm not going to recap this one beat by beat bc that would take a million years but basic premise is our three heroes keep alternating between one world (the tardis is in danger) and another (it's the future on earth and amy and rory are settled) and have to figure out which one is real and also why this is happening. i imagine at the time it might've been more up in the air which was real bc my bf never believed for a second that the "amy is pregnant" world was the real one. i honestly don't remember if i ever did either, it's been a long time

they meet up with toby jones who is a hallucination and calls himself the dream lord and says he's here to fuck with the doctor because he feels like it. i respect his honesty. a few plot things that i did notice enough to take notes on: when the doctor touches down in "amy pregnant" world, rory is the first one to rush out to see him! the doctor sees amy and is so awed and giddy that it kind of made me sad, remembering he was a dad and a granddad once. he sees so much death and horror that little amelia pond being a mother herself must be so much for him

anywayyyy we a love a Themes episode. the plot stuff doesn't even matter really cause the actual episode is: what does amy want? does AMY know what amy wants? does she want the security, love, unconditional love of a husband and family (yes, she does) or does she want the excitement of these adventures with her very handsome imaginary friend (yes, she does). this is kind of what i was getting at the other day, it does feel like an actual choice that might make you hesitate. i would consider either one of these lives a valid and engaging one. whereas why would you stay home with mickey or your weird divorced dad or your shrew mother who does nothing but criticize you?

i like how the rory-world is such a little fairy tale, the beautiful pastoral setting, the happy ever after. because the doctor is also the fairy tale, the bedtime story, the man too big to be real. they're different stories, and amy's choice is which protagonist she wants to be, if she wants the adventure or the after (or if she thinks she can have both). and then you get this very toymaker-type villain, the author, rewriting each reality and changing the rules however he feels like. he's also massively cunty like when he says the doctor wears "clothes designed by a first year fashion student" or says that he loves a redhead "did he tell you about elizabeth the first, well, she thought she was the first" or when he comes so close to calling him a homophobic slur in that freezer i almost screamed out loud. i can't believe he's not considered a more iconic one-off. "the old man prefers the company of the old" so much of the eleven era is about deconstructing the "doctor as mythical hero" thing, rory is so good for that too of course. get his ass

i like that this episode carries on the throughline from last episode of the doctor and rory kind of casually engaging in a dick-measuring contest (last episode, very suggestively so with their flashlights). and i really like that rory calls it out for what it is "are we disagreeing or competing?" i think that was a bit of a lightbulb-moment for the doctor, too. where he realizes rory is trying the hardest he can to even match the doctor's stride and that he, eleven, is trying way too hard, bc it's not really much of a contest and eleven's pride or ego isn't worth blowing up everything rory cares about, loves, values, and wants (which is to make amy happy)

and of course. the ending. the trolley problem. rory dies and amy has to decide, is this the fake world and they need to die to escape it? or is this the real one and rory is gone? and i love that she doesn't even try to reason it out, no logic, just pure feral animal abandonment instincts and she is dead-set on murder-suicide with eleven bc either they need to die to break the spell or she can't stand a life without rory. and she has no way of knowing that was the right decision other than she refused to consider otherwise. i don't think amy is right when she says she never realized how much she loved rory until just then, i think she's so damaged that she couldn't stand to accept HIS love until she realized how bad it hurt to have it gone. this will also continue through her post-"good man goes to war" behavior that drives the beginning of s7. amy thinks she's unloveable, or undeserving of someone as Good as rory, so she sabotages herself up until she loses him, and then she can't bear it. god she's so REAL

and then of course the "real" world was also fake and the doctor blew them all up to save them for real. and the dream lord was a manifestation of the doctor's worst impulses, instincts, desires, fears, etc bc they all got fantasy ergot poisoning. it's a little wack but idk i don't want this show to get all the wibbly wobbly explained okay i will accept ANY amount of timey wimey bullshit if the themes and character work are fire. actually isn't this basically a valeyard kind of character? kind of a time lord victorious one. i would love to have seen more dream lord. this was the only episode of dw this writer ever wrote and that's a bummer, i'd have loved to have seen more

one last shoutout is that when the doctor first arrives in rory-world he goes "what do you do to stave off the..." and rory finishes the sentence with "boredom?" just as amy finishes it with "self harm?" god that says it all doesn't it. this was incredibly rambly but this was a really rich, dense episode. and i needed to relish in some goodness before the next few stinkers

[jojoblessed365]

Snippet of 'Teach Me Tonight'

In response to yesterday's poll, here's a snippet of tomorrow's chapter. So here goes:

So, naturally, once Rory has made up her mind about a course of action, it all goes to shit almost immediately.

It happens during the block after lunch, about halfway through. Rory’s teaching her second of her two back-to-back classes of American Lit and she’s pretty much just keeping an eye on the students while they halfass their way through a worksheet about the American Dream as depicted in Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby, Tennessee Williams’ The Glass Menagerie and Arthur Miller’s Death of a Salesman when there’s a knock on her classroom door.

Rory, and pretty much every student, turns to see Jess standing in the doorway. And her heart just leaps into her throat and she has to gulp against the feeling while every warning bell goes off in the back of her head.

Jess stands there, looking at her with the most inscrutable look on his face, features carefully composed into a hard mask, giving absolutely nothing away. “Miss Gilmore, I need to see you in the hall for a moment.” His voice, like his face, is hard, leaving no room for argument and those warning bells becoming blaring sirens.

Shit, he’s pissed. Well, there goes all my hope, Rory thinks as disappointment begins to build inside of her.

A low “ooo” ripples through the room and Rory turns to level a stern glare at everyone. “Keep working. I’ll be back in just a minute.” Something in her voice must give no room for argument, either, because the entire class immediately looks back down at their papers. With a deep breath, Rory gets up from the stool she’s perched on and wipes her suddenly sweaty palms on her blouse before she moves to head out to the hallway. Jess waits for her to get to the door and swiftly turns a heel and she takes the moment as she follows him out to just stare at his retreating form once more before he turns her down and tears her a new one.

She was right earlier; he is wearing a tight dark grey t-shirt that exposes his biceps and highlights his muscular upper body that makes her mouth water and she chides herself for checking him out when he’s just about to kill every hope and dream she’s ever had.

But Rory knows she’s never going to stop being attracted to Jess, no matter what, and she’s just going to have to figure out a way to manage this for the rest of her life. As Rory steps through the doorway, she turns to pull the door shut behind her – really, whatever she can do to limit the potential audience size for the metaphysical murder that’s about to happen.

For a brief moment, Rory closes her eyes, still facing the door, and takes a deep breath before she feels ready to face him. “Jess,” she says as she starts to turn, apology building up on her lips – might as well see if she can soften some of the blow she’s about to receive. “I’m so sorry, I-”

[tatestripedsweater]

Evan’s React: Plus Size Reader (Soft and Squishy as the anon worded it) - Requested

Warnings: Body Shaming, Mental Abuse

A/N: I am plus size myself so writing this did comfort me, but also I write the characters as they appear in the show so I don’t sugar coat it.. so these might not be the answers you wanted (mainly Kai’s) but there’s a warning for a reason. Any hateful comments will be deleted/blocked.

Tate would prefer a slimmer S/O just because he more so cared about what people thought, it not really being about hurting your feelings. He didn’t want his mother to bring up your weight if he ever brought you home to meet her (which eventually has to happen), so in that instance I think he’d gravitate towards someone slimmer but he wouldn’t say no to a plus size person.

Kit wouldn’t care about how much you weighed, he loved you for your heart and kindness. If anyone gave you any shit for your size then he would be the first person to put them in their place, I think the only thing Kit would worry about would be your health but at the end of the day you were happy and that’s all that mattered to him. He would definitely throw you onto the bed during sex, it didn’t matter how much you weighed for him to do that.

Pre-Death Kyle is a sweetheart, weight wasn’t an issue for him much like Kit. Kyle would be the type of guy to cuddle up to you and use your tummy as a pillow, he would even kiss your stomach and blow raspberries on it if you ever felt insecure or upset about your weight. We all know he’s a soft boy, so he would purposely buy oversized shirts for himself then he would let you wear them, so you could wear his shirts without you feeling insecure about your weight.

Post-Death/Franken-Kyle wouldn’t really understand why your weight even mattered, all he saw was you and his face would instantly light up like a Christmas tree. Much like what he was like before he died, he would cuddle up to your stomach but instead he would actually end up massaging your stomach with his hand and would call it ‘jelly’. It would’ve offended you if it was anyone but Kyle, but the way he grinned whenever he did it only made you smile. It was like a form of therapy for him.

Jimmy knew what it was like to be different and that people would pick on you due to your weight, so if anyone said anything then he would automatically get protective. Jimmy always told you how perfect you were to him and that you didn’t need to loose weight or change anything, and if you did then to do it because you wanted to and not to please other people.

We all know James has a very open mind, even though he’s from a questionable era he treats Liz with so much respect so having a plus size S/O wouldn’t even phase him. He would buy you the best clothes that bring out your curves, James wouldn’t take any slander about your body. If he heard someone made comments about you that were anything but kind, they would be dead within the next hour.

Rory wouldn’t mind if you were slim or plus size, he loved all bodies and even is the type of guy to hype you up on social media if you ever feel insecure. Rory would even call you his ‘jelly baby’ since he loves your squishy cuddles and would kiss you with every chance he got since he loved your chubby cheeks as well. The boy just adores you.

Back in Edward’s time having a fuller figure was seen as healthy and even showed that the person had wealth, so he wasn’t bothered by you being plus size and would most likely be proud of himself that he managed to get someone like you in his life. Edward would have painters come to create portraits of you so that he can show them off in his art gallery, not that anyone would see it as it was for his eyes only. He may also have had a risqué painting of you above his bed.

Kai would want a slimmer S/O but he wouldn’t say no to you just because of your weight, even though he would use it against you and any insecurities to bring you down. He would most likely be the type of guy to have you ride him to ‘loose weight’ as it’s a form of exercise in his mind, would even go as far as forcing you to eat healthy so you can be ‘perfect’ for your Divine Ruler.

I feel like Gallant would be into more of a bigger partner anyway since he saw them as strong and being able to dominate him since he’s such a sub, but if you ever did have those days of insecurity he would shut you down almost instantly and list everything he loved about you. Boy would even make a power point if he really had too.

Peter (Maximoff) is like Rory, he would hype you up and would tell you how beautiful you are everyday. He would also leave little love notes in your room and on the mirrors in your bathroom reminding you how gorgeous you are, he also loves that he has a snacking partner and would never judge you for what you ate since he could eat for an entire country anyway.

[littlemessyjessi]

“Come Away With Me” : Regulus Black: Plus Size and Shortie : Chapter One “Prisoner”

Reggie deserved better and by Godric he’s gonna have it. 

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You keep makin' it harder to stay But I still can't run away I gotta know, why can't you Why can't you just let me go?

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“Prisoner” - Miley Cyrus ft. Dua Lipa

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The turning point for Regulus Arcturus Black came the summer before his sixth year.

History was repeating itself.

Walburga Black stared down at her youngest son, seeing nothing more than Sirius in that moment.

She'd warned him about that girl.

Aurora Monroe, or Rory, had been Regulus' best friend since their first day.

It would seem that the Black brothers had a penchant for befriending half blood, half breed combinations.

But that wasn't why Walburga hated the girl.

She didn't even know Rory was a werewolf.

But she did know that she was a half blood and she knew that she was a Monroe.

And that was enough for her to hate her.

Two families who had been at each other's throats since what seemed like the beginning of time.

It all came down to money.

As most things did.

They were two of the wealthiest families in the wizarding communities of England.  

Thus it was a constant competition and rivalry set in a long time ago.

The Black had old money that came from a long line of aristocracy.

The Monroe's built their fortune and built it rather quickly and also managed to spite a Black ancestor in the process.

And thus began the fued.

Walburga had warned her son, over and over again about being around her but he didn't listen.

Regulus was far more mild mannered than Sirius but at his core...he was actually truly very stubborn.

And he refused to budge on that.

She'd threatened to blast him off the family tree just like she had Sirius.

A moment that was still burned into Regulus' memory.

But still he held steadfast.

But then she snapped the final chord.

Her and Orion had never joined Voldemort and his band of followers but she supported them.

And she had every intention of Regulus joining the ranks.

Even if meant she had to force him.

It wasn't even that she was willing to force him to do something.

He was used to that.

But he knew what that meant.

It meant a death sentence for Rory and Regulus would burn it all down before he let that happen.

He flew up the stairs and into his room rummaging around for the mirror he and Rory had gotten from Zonko's before the summer.

"Rory! Aurora!" he called into the mirror.

He could hear her fumbling for a second before her freckly scarred face appeared.

"Hey, Regs!" she broke into a grin but it quickly faded when she could see the distress on his face. "Regulus, what's wrong? What happened?"

"I gotta get out of here." he said, struggling to breathe. "Right now."

"Ok, ok. What happened? Are you ok?" she asked, amber eyes searching him through the mirror.

"I'm fine. But I gotta go.  I'll be ok. But I needed to tell you just in case you don't hear from me for a bit." he said holding the mirror with one hand and shoving things into his trunk with the other.

A loud banging at the door caused his head to snap the side and the unlocking charm could be heard as his mother opened the door.

"Where the hell do you think you're going?" she screeched and Aurora gasped.

"Who is that?!" Walburga snapped and snatched the mirror out of Regulus' hand.

She seethed as she took in the sight of Aurora Monroe on the other side of it.

Regulus didn't even have time to prepare for impact when Walburga backhanded him and threw the mirror across the room.

Aurora's angry scream could be heard right before it shattered and Regulus looked at his mother in horror as she advanced.

"The only way you leave this house is over my dead body." she whispered and Regulus looked up at her in horror.

"That can be arranged."

The two of them turned to look at the tiny figure in the door who had clearly just apparated into mass chaos.

Amber eyes ablaze and white hair like a halo around her.

She was furious.

Aurora looked nothing short of an angel of death.

"You little bitch!" Walburga growled. "Stupid filthy mudblood! You'll be expelled for using magic outside of Hogwarts."

Aurora smirked, "I'm of age, you musky hussy."

Walburga drew her wand and Regulus panicked.

"No!" he said lunging at his mother but Aurora had already cast the spell to disarm her.

Walburga grabbed Regulus by the hair jerking his head back.

She narrowed her eyes at Aurora who absolutely refused to back down.

"You're not taking him." Walburga spat.

"You let him go or I snap this in half and turn it over to the ministry.  And I'm betting there's a fair share of unforgivable curses lingering in this wood." Rory said.

She and Walburga stared at each other for the longest time before Walburga's eye twitched.

She pulled her hand back and Regulus squeezed his eyes preparing for the blow when suddenly the pressure was released from hair and he stumbled to regain his balance.

Aurora had stunned Walburga and sent her flying back into the wall where she now lay unconscious.

She performed the body bind curse on her and turned to Regulus.

"Get what you need, Regs.  We gotta go.  Right now." she said  sternly but he was too shocked to move.

She sighed and reached out to touch his arm, "Reggie, we gotta go.  Right now.  Get the essentials."

He seemed to snap out of it and shoved a few things in his trunk before grabbing his broom out of his closet.

"Is there anyone else home, Regs?" she asked as she kept a watchful eye over Walburga's unconscious form and the door.

"No." Regulus shook his head. "Just Kreacher. Oh fuck."

It dawned him in that moment.

"Kreacher!" he called out.

A second later the house elf appeared with a pop and promptly began to freak out over Walburga.

"Mistress!" he wailed.

"Kreacher, please." Regulus said. "I know, I know.  But she was..."

"She was attacking Master Regulus again?" he asked and Regulus nodded.

"I have to go, Kreacher.  Come with us. I can give you clothes and free you.  I haven't been blasted off the tree yet." he pleaded with the elf who had become his friend over the years.

He knew better though.

"Kreacher must stay in the Noble House of Black." he said solemnly.

And suddenly Regulus understood how Sirius must have felt when he had to leave.

He didn't really have a choice but Regulus wouldn't go with him just like Kreacher wouldn't go now.

"Kreacher will keep the Mistress asleep." the elf said.

Aurora watched and Regulus knelt to hug the elf once more before grabbing his trunk and slinging his broom over his shoulder.

"Ok." he said, passing a hand over Kreacher's head once more.

Aurora stepped forward and Regulus wound his arm through hers before she turned and apparated away.

As they disappeared into thin air, Regulus' eyes watered.

Sadness, relief, fear.

It was all mixed into one but one thing was for sure.

Everything changed from that moment on.

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Chapter Two Coming Soon

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Keep Scrolling after author’s note for additional story pics!

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Hello, loves! I hope you enjoy this Regs story! It’s a tragedy what happened to Reggie and he was done really dirty both in his story and the lack of story we get for this multi dimensional selfless character! So he’s gonna have some good times in this story, dammit! 

Anyway, I love you all and I would love to hear from you!  Please feel free to share your thoughts in the comments, via reblog or just hit up the ask box! 

I love you all. 

Love, 

Kenny 

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Also, feel free to imagine Regs anyway you like but I do like him as Timothee Chalamet... like a lot of people because Timmy is precious. Also, I feel this gif perfectly encompasses his time in that hell hole.  It’s ok, Reggie bebe.  Mama’s got you.  I’ll give you cocoa and noms and blankies.  It’ll be ok now. 

Some inspiration pics for Rory! 

These all played a part in the inspiration for Aurora’s hair.  Rory’s hair turned white with stress due to her condition much like how Remus’ hair started greying early.  

I particularly loved the color of the first and how floofy it was.  But I love the texture and also the poof of the second.  I also absolutely adored the second lady’s freckles which I picture Rory’s being absolutely littered with. 

Aurora has golden brown eyes. Warm like the sun.  Here are a few inspiration pics. 

I also used these and the picture from the freckled girl with the yellow top as inspiration for her skin tone as I see Aurora as very brown but dashed in freckles and heavily scarred just due to years of being afflicted with lycanthropy.   I also think it makes a striking contrast with her hair and such an juxtaposition against Regs’ fair features and dark hair.  

This was my main inspiration for Rory’s scars.  She has them all over her but perhaps the most noticeable is the one on her face and I feel this one encompasses it perfectly.   

As far as height went I couldn’t find many pics for inspiration so I begrudgingly used my own tiny form of 4′11″ as reference lol.  She is smol bean like me.  I did find some body inspos though! Rory is very fluffy! 

I don’t always show my inspo pics for characters but I felt like it was nice thing to start to do as it always helps me begin to form the layout of a character.  And I love you all so I figured it’d be a nice thing to share.  

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Btw, the only tags I do is for my permanent tag list but if you ever want to be added to that, all you have to do is just go to the ask box and ask to be added! I’d be happy to do so!

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Also, if you love the Marauders feel free to check out some of my recent Marauder works! 

Chasing Jess (Sirius Black and Jess Scamander) 

A Deal With Cupid (James Potter x Reader) 

All Fun and Games (Poly Marauders Fics) 

Talking to the Moon (Remus Lupin x Reader)

Torn (Remus Lupin x Rowan Black) 

And honestly so many more. 

I’m kind of a ho for Harry Potter and an outright slut for the Marauders.  Just being honest. 

[riversofmars]

Here is part two, just needed a bit of extra time on the second half but happy with it now, just a bit too long to be a oneshot lol. Enjoy! <3

At the End of the Universe Part 2

“Get myself together? That’s rich coming from you.“ The Doctor unscrewed a bottle and took a swing. “If one of us has impulse control issues it’s you, isn’t it.“ She jabbed her finger at Missy. “And to think I wasted all this time on you.“ She laughed in a bitter sort of way and shook her head to herself as she recalled all the time she had spent on trying to rehabilitate Missy. She had given her a chance. She had tried her best to reconnect with her childhood friend and to help her become good… But she had betrayed her in the end. “Seventy bloody years and you actually had me going, didn’t you. Actually had me believe you were willing to change. Only to abandon me.“ She had tried so hard to talk Missy around at the time, to stand with her, but she had turned her down and gone to save herself instead, leaving her - well him at the time - to be mortally wounded and forced to regenerate. Missy just stared back at her, looking confused, so the Doctor carried on with her rant. Maybe if she let it all out, that would make her go away. “That was such a disappointment but hey, I was naive back then, wasn’t I. But then you just had to come back, didn’t you, to outdo yourself and prove you hadn’t changed one bit. If only I hadn’t been so stupid. I should have executed you when I had the chance. But hey, hindsight is always 20/20, isn’t it.“ 

“What are you talking about?“ Missy frowned feeling uneasy. Had she abandoned the Doctor, taken the opportunity and run? Maybe she could fill in the gaps, retrieve the memories she was missing. But why would she have done that? Things had actually been going so well… But she couldn’t be sure she wouldn’t have just seized the moment if the chance of freedom presented itself. She had only entertained him because she had been his captive, right?

“Oh what, don’t tell me because you’re still Missy you don’t know what you’ll end up doing when you regenerate again. Bullshit. You’re in my head, of course you know.“ The Doctor wasn’t even sure why she was still carrying on but the words just kept tumbling out of her mouth.

“Doctor, you’re not hallucinating.“ River said calmly, taking a step towards her. “We’re here.“

“Of course you are.“ The Doctor sighed sarcastically and turned her attention to River. “You know how much I miss you, River? Do you have any idea how hard it was to let you go when our night on Darillium was over?“ The memory still haunted her. Having to part ways with her, knowing, that she would be going to her death in the Library shortly. It still chilled her to the bone. 

“Yes, actually, I do, I…“ River’s heart lifted a little. If Darillium was the last time the Doctor had seen her, this was the next encounter for both of them. The stories had been wrong. Clearly a lot of time had passed for the Doctor but it didn’t matter now, they could pick up where they left of. 

“You and me, our time together is just one cruel cosmic joke isn’t it. I mean, come on. Imagine meeting this mystery woman who seems to know every last thing about you and you watch her die. And of course, I just brush it off like I always do and carry on. But then I meet you again and again and again and of course I fall in love with you across the centuries. All the while knowing how it’s going to end.“ Angry tears sprung to her eyes. “How and when and why you will die and knowing that I was no comfort to you whatsoever, because I didn’t even know you then. And Darillium, oh how I dreaded it… knowing it would be the last time I would see you before the end. I put it off and put it off and then suddenly, there we were. And now I would give anything to go back, anything! But it’s too late now, our time is up.“

“Doctor, that’s where I’ve come from, Darillium, 24 years, I have no intention of dying just yet.“ River tried to intervene without letting the weight of her words crush her. The sadness in her eyes was heartbreaking. If this was true - and why wouldn’t it be? - the Doctor had been carrying this burden for such a long time, it was no wonder she was breaking under the weight of it. 

“Don’t. Don’t, River. Just stop talking.“ The Doctor held up her hands defensively before wiping the tears off her face frustrated with her own weakness.

“Doctor, the Professor is right. You’ve come to the end of the universe to blow of some steam. Well, so have we. And you know that’s possible, we’re all time travellers here. And frankly, you have to admit, partying away the end of everything is something both of us are likely to do.“ Missy tried to reason with her. 

“No, no, no, you're not really here, I'm making this up.“ She shook her head definitely. She took another swing from the bottle. “You know what, this was a terrible idea, this is proper messing with my head, fucking hell.“ She put the bottle down and buried her face in her hands. 

“Yes, this was a pretty bad idea.“ River tried to sooth her. “What happened, Doctor? What brought you here?“ River wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to ask what triggered her coming here today. Clearly there were a lot of contributing factors but something must have set her off. Seeing the Doctor like this broke River’s heart. 

“Don’t try and make me talk about it, I’m sick of everyone wanting me to talk and share, I’m not gonna have this out with my subconscious. You can pretend as much as you like not to know and try and make me talk but that’s not what I’m here for.“ Why was she even doing this to herself? The Doctor closed her eyes, trying her best to regain control of her mind.

“What are you here for?“ Missy asked.

“Fuck knows.“ The Doctor exclaimed and stumbled, nearly falling over her own feet. She caught herself on the back wall and leaned against it to steady herself. “I don’t even know why I thought this would help. This has been a disaster, look at me, talking to the two of you like you’re actually here.“ She started laughing. There was nothing else she could do at this point.

“Doctor!“ River snapped in frustration and circled around the counter. “For the last time, we’re here.“ She reached out and the Doctor scrambled back, nearly falling over. 

“Don’t do that. Don’t try and trick me and try and give me hope, that’s not fair.“ She sobbed. She went for another bottle of drink.

“Doctor!“ River ripped the bottle out of her hand and threw it against the wall airing her frustration. 

“How did you…“ The Doctor stared at her in shock, her brain was slower than usual, struggling to catch up. How did she do that if she was a hallucination?

“Stop acting like an idiot and get yourself together.“ River grabbed her by the collar of her coat and gave her a shake, proving beyond a doubt that she was real. 

“You’re here… River, I…“ Tears sprang to the Doctor’s eyes again and her stomach turned. All the things she had just said to her - to both of them - and they were really here. She couldn’t think or see straight anymore but she managed to fling her arms around her wife. How many years had it been since Darillium? She wasn’t even sure anymore. Suddenly, her brain was racing with possibilities. What if this was her chance. Even after all this time she had never figured out a way to get River’s consciousness out of the Library. What if she never would? What if the only way to save her was if she never went and this was that opportunity. “Come with me River, right now, come to the TARDIS, let’s go, let’s run and never look back.“ She pleaded burying her face in her curls. She would just never let her go to the Library. They would push it further and further away from them, further into River’s future. 

“Well, I’ve actually got a very exciting expedition lined up.“ River chuckled, relieved by her enthusiasm. 

“Don’t go to the Library.“ The Doctor burst out unable to stop herself. She wasn’t thinking at this point. Her head was swimming with alcohol, drugs, hormones and the most dangerous thing of all: Hope. “Promise me, don’t go. Never go to the Library, that’s where it happens, that’s…“

“Doctor.“ Missy interrupted realising what she was saying. She would be creating a paradox. If River Song never went to the Library, she would never have met the Doctor…

“Don’t, this is none of your business!“ The Doctor barked at Missy and pulled away from River grabbing her wife by the shoulders. “River, listen, time can be rewritten, it will be fine, I’m still going to travel with Amy and Rory, they will still have you, we will still meet, maybe a bit later but…“ She tried to justify it to herself just as much as to River. Surely undoing River’s death wouldn’t effect any other part of their timeline, would it?

“Doctor…“ River didn’t know what to do or say, she was still trying to wrap her head around what she was saying. Had she really just told her where and when she was going to die? How was she supposed to chose to go to her death? How was she supposed to cope with that knowledge? She knew she couldn’t change her personal timeline, not like that, and the Doctor had to know that too, didn’t she? No matter how intoxicated, desperate and impulsive she was being, she had to know that simple fact. How could she put this burden on her? Why would she tell her? Anxiety swept over River as she pushed the Doctor away, she felt like she couldn’t breath, she needed space.

“River…“ The Doctor tried to pull her into her arms but River wouldn’t let her.

“Why would you tell me that?“ River exclaimed. “It has to happen. You can’t just undo something that’s already happened cause you didn’t like it. But how am I supposed to go there now knowing I’m going to die? Why would you tell me that?“

“Yes, really, why would you.“ Missy knew the Doctor wasn’t thinking straight, but she still couldn’t believe she would do this to her wife. And perhaps to the universe. All sorts of things could happen if River didn’t show up to her own death. Missy turned to River who looked helpless and lost, just staring at the Doctor. Missy wasn’t entirely sure why she chose to get involved. This was the Doctor’s mess to clean up but maybe the seventy years she’d spent with him had left a mark after all. Why else would she do something that could be considered kind? “Sorry about this Professor but it’s for the best.“ Before River could protest or the Doctor could intervene, Missy grabbed a hold of River’s face and placed her fingertips on each side to wipe her memory of this encounter. 

“NO!“ The Doctor shouted when River collapsed to the floor. She gave Missy a shove with surprising strength knocking her back against the counter. The Doctor dropped onto her knees to check on her wife. She breathed a sigh of relief when she realised she was just unconscious.  

“You know she can’t know about this, why would you tell her how she has to die? That’s cruel, even for you.“ Missy shook her head in disbelief as she pulled herself upright, bracing against the counter. Suddenly, she felt another surge of regenerative energy rush through her body. The mind wipe her taken more out of her than she realised. “Not. Now.“ She growled clenching her fists, forcing the process to a halt again, she wasn’t sure how many more times she would be able to. 

“You’re dying.“ The Doctor looked up at her in disbelief, cradling River’s head on her lap.

“It would appear that way.“ Missy ground her teeth, the Doctor was the last person she wanted to see her like this. 

“When is this for you?“ The Doctor asked with a frown, trying to put the pieces together. Holding River close, she felt calmer now. “What happened?“

“Oh, I don’t know.“ Missy waved it off. “Don’t even remember… We went aboard that colony ship reversing out of a black hole, things are a bit fuzzy after that.“ 

“Crossing of timelines… you were there, younger you…“ The Doctor answered slowly. This was Missy after she had left with her younger self. Somehow she had gotten herself killed on the way off that ship by the looks of it. Just like the Doctor had. But if Missy didn’t remember what had happened, chances were they would never find out. 

“I guessed as much…“ Missy mused as there weren’t many other options for such perfuse memory loss. The lost time bothered her but there was only so much the Doctor could help her piece together. “Is that where I abandoned you? Is that what you’re cross about? Because I’ve got to be honest, I can’t justify actions I don’t remember. Or ones I haven’t done yet.“ 

“Why did you come here Missy?“ The Doctor asked avoiding the question. She had revealed too much already but the temptation was certainly there. Like with River. She stroked her hair softly. Would the Master reconsider if she told her now she would commit genocide and kill their entire race? Probably not… She would find out about the secret of the timeless child regardless, that explosive anger would be the same and no foreknowledge would stop that. And if she stopped her now, killed her here… Then the Doctor herself would never have came here struggling with the memories of Gallifrey burning after the Master had destroyed it, creating a paradox. It was no use. She shook her head to herself, disappointed in herself for even thinking it.  

“A last hurrah I guess.“ Missy shrugged looking around. Somehow, the raving party had lost its appeal rather in light of more serious revelations. “Just like your wife… who thought she would never see you again.“ She added in an off hand sort of way.

“She won’t remember now…“ The Doctor mumbled stroking River’s hair. “Which is probably for the best.“ She felt incredibly guilty. She could blame it on her intoxication but that wouldn’t be entirely fair. It had been impulsive and thoughtless. It had been about seeing a way out and bolting for the exit.

“You can thank me later.“ Missy retorted.

“I’ve been trying for so long to work it out, to find a way to save her, I was jumping at the easy solution…“ The Doctor admitted, looking at her wife absentmindedly. 

“Some things just can’t be done. You have a thing about hopeless cases, haven’t you.“ Missy retorted, squaring her jaw. 

“You might have been, River is a different story.“ The Doctor shot back, she didn’t want to go down this road with her. If Missy didn’t even remember what she did, there was no point. “

“It was all very touching, your star-crossed lovers story but word of advice, I think it’s time you stopped torturing yourself and let her go and move on. Look at what it’s doing to you.“ Missy pointed to her, barely keeping it together, sitting on the floor of an underground club at the end of the universe, cradling her unconscious wife. It was a ridiculously pitiful image. 

“You don’t know the first thing about this, about me.“ The Doctor snapped, her eyes shooting up. Missy had no right talking to her like that. Not after everything she had contributed to her fragile state of mind.

“Well, I preferred you when you were all sulky, dark and moody. What’s happened since? Have you gone soft in the head?“ Missy retorted, feeling like picking a fight now. The hadn’t said as much as thank you for her surprisingly well-meant and actually helpful intervention. 

“You have no idea what I’ve been through since we last met.“ The Doctor growled. 

“No clearly.“ Missy took a step forward and crouched down across from her. “But when I last saw you, River Song was already dead. And she’s dead now. Her death happened centuries ago and you can’t change that. You couldn’t then and you can’t do now, so why beat yourself up over it now? Just cause she’s here looking all pretty on your lap?“ It made the Doctor snap, she let go of River and lunged forward throwing herself at Missy. Caught off guard, Missy crashed onto the floor and the Doctor was on top of her pinning her down with her weight.

“I wish I could just kill you.“ The Doctor shouted in wild rage. Her memories of Gallifrey flashed before her eyes, devastated, empty, burning Gallifrey. All the pain and death Missy would cause if she was allowed to regenerate… 

“Then why don’t you?“ Missy shot back with a mad twinkle in her eyes. She could feel the regenerative fizzing inside of her, trying to bubble to the surface. What was one more death?

“Like you pointed out already, I can’t mess with fixed events.“ The Doctor pressed through gritted teeth. 

“You didn’t care about that with your wife a minute ago.“ Missy retorted with a laugh. Until tonight she had never seen the Doctor like this. Desperate. Angry. Unhinged. 

“I clearly care more about saving her, than about killing you.“ The Doctor growled. 

“You’re not going to save her, Doctor.“ Missy laughed. She couldn’t believe that she still hadn’t accepted that. 

“I will find a way. You have no idea what I’m capable of.“ The Doctor growled. “The things I’ve done… You’ve only caught a glimpse.“

“Go on, Doctor, go off the deep end, why don’t you. I’d pay good money to see that happen.“ Missy tried to push herself up a little and the Doctor pushed her back down.

“I always control myself, always hold back, be kind, be measured, keep the universe safe.“ The Doctor laughed bitterly. “Well quite frankly, the universe can get fucked for all I care. All the times I’ve saved it, and what have I ever gotten in return? For every crack I fixed I got one in return. For every life I saved… the universe is a cruel place.“

“Yes it is.“ Missy couldn’t help but agree, marvelling at how the Doctor’s expression went from fury to resignation. 

“I’m so sick of it.“ The Doctor let go of Missy and sat up, her anger fading away. 

“So what are you going to do? Are you just gonna forget to get back into your TARDIS? Put an end to it.“ Missy pushed herself up. 

“If only it was that easy.“ The Doctor mumbled, getting off Missy. 

“It could be. I mean, it would be a shame but if I’m dead in your future, I suppose I shouldn’t care.“ Missy shrugged. 

“No, there’s still things I’ve got to do.“ The Doctor looked back to River. She would have to get her to safety on the off chance she didn’t wake up before crunch time. She had to take her back to Luna University, she would be fine there. And she would be able to go to the Library, she would be back on track… She was thinking more rationally now. She knew it was a fixed point that had to happen. She would have to find another way and rescue her from the Library, like she had always meant to. That had always been the plan after Darillium. She had bought herself time by saving her consciousness to the data core. She just had to figure out what to do now. Somehow. There had to be a way. One day she would find it. The universe owed her this. “I guess I’ll just keep trying. I have to keep going.“ She crouched next to River and lifted her up, cradling her in her arms, she would have to carry her back to the TARDIS. “Maybe one day I will find a way, change the punch line on that cruel joke that was our time together. I will find a way.“ She was talking more to herself than anything else as she pressed a kiss to River’s hair with her head cradled against her chest. “You’ll be seeing me again soon.“ She told Missy and turned to leave.

“So I gathered… I’m looking forward to it.“ Missy smirked. “Tell me though, Doctor, was it me? That did this to you? That made you come here today.“ She sat up and gestured around herself. Desperation, fear and sorrow were almost palpable in the air now as the end drew nearer. “Because I really want it to have been me.“ 

“Die already, Missy, save the theatrics.“ The Doctor huffed. 

“Not here, imagine if I fall asleep after regenerating and don’t leave in time. No… I think this time, I’ll go home to die.“ Missy slowly stood up steadying herself again the counter.

“To Gallifrey?“ The Doctor questioned without looking around, she didn’t want her to see her reaction.

“I’ve not been back for a long time now… Will you ever go back, Doctor? Come home?“ Missy asked almost hopefully.

“I can’t.“ The Doctor retorted curtly. 

“Why not?“ Missy sounded confused and the Doctor wanted to tell her it was because she would lay waste to it soon but she didn’t. She wouldn’t be that cruel as she went there for comfort. Even if it probably meant that this was when she learned the timeless child secrets and set this whole chain of events in motion. 

“Because I have other things to do first. Sometimes I forget the reason why I’m still going.“ The Doctor turned back to face Missy one last time. “I had forgotten when I came here earlier. I was so wrapped up in it all, in myself and sometimes I just forget… The need to keep going is there, always urging me on but I lose sight of what it is I’m still going for…“

“And what’s that?“ Missy asked. 

“I haven’t saved her yet.“ The Doctor looked down at River.

“You sentimental idiot.“ Missy huffed and shook her head as the Doctor turned and carried on on her way out of the club without looking back. She held on tightly to her wife, enjoyed the feeling of her skin under her fingertips while she could. She carried her like she was the most precious thing in the universe. As the TARDIS came into view she realised that it didn’t matter who exactly she was and what had happened to her. In time, the images of Gallifrey burning would stop haunting her and she would accept that it wasn’t her doing. She would move past this in time. This had been a trip worth making. At the end of the universe she had found the one thing no-one else around here had: A reason to keep going. 

[godlyborn]

never felt a feeling of comfort. / bailey ft. elias pt. iii

date: december 12, 2020 (though some parts are set in the past) trigger warnings: slight child abuse, abandonment mention, war mention, death mention

part i // part ii // part iv // part v // part vi // part vii // part viii

Bailey opened her suitcase. After a long talk with Logan about whether or not she should take a chance and go to Michigan, along with a talk with Hannah about going there, she decided it was time. Bailey had spent most of the week with this on her mind. Though there was a part of her that felt like it was going to backfire, there was always that part of her that wanted this - no - needed this. Bailey had spent years being left by people, that it made it hard for her to actually open up to others. 

Bailey’s mind was plagued with the bad memories that came with thinking about all the places she was passed around as a child. All the places that couldn’t accept her for who she was. All the places that tore down her spirit as a child. 

&&&.

Bailey sat on the floor outside her foster parent’s room, listening to them screaming in the background. Bailey was five. “She’s psychotic, Mark!” Ellen screamed to the other. Bailey jumped slightly at the noise.

“Ellen, the girl is five,” Mark replied.

“She threw a plate at Anna!” Ellen replied. At that point Bailey had tears in her eyes. She didn’t mean to do that. Anna had screamed at her, teased her for not having a family. Anna was their biological child, Bailey would never be her. 

Anna was teasing her and Bailey lost control, her powers had just started to show. The plate flew off the shelf, nearly hitting the other girl. Because they were mortal, it looked like Bailey had thrown it. That was the house where Bailey was then labeled as “violent”.

“She’s leaving tomorrow,” Ellen said. “I will not have a child in my house bully my daughter, Mark.”

“I understand,” he said back.

“Sharon will be picking her up, tomorrow morning.”

And she did.

&&&.

There were many homes that treated Bailey that way. She wasn’t important. Something always happened that ended in them sending Bailey back to the group home. Bailey wondered how someone could just do that. Trade her like she was some kind of toy being labeled as ‘defective’. Bailey never had a true home, not until Camp Halfblood. 

Though Bailey felt at home when it came to Camp Halfblood, there was always a part of her that longed for her to be somebody to someone. Bailey looked at her friends and her siblings, and saw some of them were with their parents, their mothers. Bailey wanted that. Bailey wanted that feeling of being loved.

&&&.

Bailey was six. She stood in the living room of her foster home. She had just broken the lamp in the living room. This wasn’t the first time that this had happened in this home, but this was the last. She could hear her foster Dad screaming at her, scolding her for what she had done. He obviously didn’t see what really happened. It was like Bailey was on a different plane of existence. She was getting yelled at, but it was like someone else was getting yelled at. If it didn’t feel like her, it would be like this wasn’t happening again. It hurt less that way. She was six, but Bailey knew what exactly was happening. 

She was snapped back into reality when Bailey’s wrist was grabbed by her foster dad, dragging her toward the room she was given. When he gripped too tight, she yelped, Bailey didn’t mean to zap him, but it happened and he pulled away quickly. “Go to your room, now!” he screamed. Bailey jumped, but she obeyed.

The next morning she was picked up from that home, with just the words ‘she just wasn’t a good fit’ and ‘danger to others’.

&&&.

Even at Camp Halfblood, a part of Bailey never felt safe. There was always a part of her that wouldn’t fully trust someone, would be scared they’d leave. Bailey had spent so many years losing people, that she never felt like she could put herself out there. She was scared to be alone, scared to feel alone again. There was always a part of Bailey that felt like she would be alone again. 

When the war came around, Bailey felt cursed. She had lost friends, and family, and most of all, she lost her home. Seeing Camp Halfblood in ruins, it hurt. This was her home, the only home that she knew. After that though, it felt tainted. Then, when it felt like she was at her worst, it got worse. When Bailey heard that Abel had died, it was like a piece of her cracked. Home wasn’t home anymore, it was just filled with broken memories from the Gods treating them like pawns. The war and Abel, made it feel like her father too had left her. Unlike many others, she didn’t leave her home, but it felt like her home had left her.

&&&.

Bailey was thirteen when she saw her sister crack. Rory didn’t leave, Rory didn’t die, but when Abel died they took a piece of her with them, and Bailey could tell. She knew that Rory was trying to be strong for her, but Bailey could tell it broke Rory. It wasn’t too long after the death of Abel, that Bailey really saw - or in her case - heard Rory actually break. Bailey had planned to go to bed that night, but every time she shut her eyes, she could see the events of what happened in the previous months unfold. She spent many nights awake because of this.

It was quiet at first, but it was there. Bailey wasn’t sure what it was at first, but soon she recognized it. It was Rory crying. Bailey just sat there in the silence, listening to Rory’s sobs. Bailey thought about going in there, holding her sister tight, but there was a part of Bailey that knew she couldn’t fix this or make it better. She knew that if Rory knew that Bailey heard, she’d feel bad because she knew Rory was trying to be strong for her. That’s when Bailey decided she had to be strong for Rory. 

Bailey shut everything off then. Bailey couldn’t break, she had to be the strong one then. Bailey told herself that it was better if she locked it all away, much like she had told herself plenty of times before that. If she locked it away, it didn’t hurt as much. 

And instead of someone else leaving Bailey, she was leaving herself.

&&&.

Bailey heard a knock on her door, and she put the stuff she was holding into the small suitcase. She turned, opening it up to reveal her cousin, Elias. “Hey,” she greeted him, a smile upon her face. 

Elias held up the two bracelets that he always carried with him, ones that transformed into his sheath of arrows and recurve bow. “Just please don’t lose them okay? I know I’m a pacifist, but that’s literally the only weapon I’m good at.”

“Noted,” Bailey said. “I promise I won’t lose them, E.”

Elias clipped them onto Bailey’s wrist. “Are you sure about this Bailey?” Bailey could tell that the other was shaking. “I mean, Michigan is so far and you don’t know her, and--”

“Elias,” Bailey cut him off, grabbing hold of his hands to comfort him and reassure him. Elias was always the voice of reason, the one to think of what could really go wrong, maybe sometimes too much. “I’ll be fine I promise. This place is my home, nothing is going to keep me from this place.”

Elias let out a soft sigh. “What about the monsters? We have a pretty bad history of it this year, with your sister and my brother.”

Bailey nodded. “That’s why I will have my ax and your arrows, Elias it’s going to be okay, sometimes we have to travel outside of Camp Halfblood. Our blood shouldn’t stop us from doing that. Besides I think if I didn’t go, I’ll regret it for the rest of my life, more than I’ll regret any monster attack that happens as a result.”

“I already almost lost Rory and Sefa, I can’t lose you,” Elias said. 

Bailey wrapped her arms around Elias in a hug. “You won’t E, I promise. I’ve been here since I was seven years old, I’ve been through a damn war, I think I can handle a monster or two if need be, okay?”

Elias squeezed her back in a hug. He took another breath, trying not to cry. “Just be careful, alright?”

“I will, I promise,” Bailey replied. “I’ll be back before you even know I’m gone.”

When they broke, Elias left back to his own cabin, and she was alone again.

&&&.

Bailey was alone again.

A balloon was filling up inside her, ready to pop. Her emotions that buried themselves for years, the thing she taught herself coming back to haunt her. After her fight with Abel, she found herself outside the border so no one could hear her cry, scream, anything that made her feel like she mattered to someone, to even the universe. 

Bailey knew deep down she had so many people in her corner, but at times like these when someone leaves her, it felt like she was alone again. She was angry, she was upset. All that Abel needed to say was that they wouldn’t leave her. 

Every time she felt like this, she felt like that little girl who needed love and didn’t get it again.

Bailey let the balloon pop.

Her screams echoed, the wind blowing the trees, leaves falling from them. She screamed till her throat was raw and she had tears streaming down her cheeks. She fell to her knees, sobbing. What was wrong with her? Was she broken? What was so hard about loving her?

[wheres-the-pool-ladder]

The Sycorax Killed and Saved the Time Lords, and Also Killed Clara

The title is mostly a joke, but hear me out.

Warning: Major Spoilers for a number of series finales.

Literally every New Who Master episode wouldn’t have happened if Ten hadn’t lost his hand in the sword fight against the Sycorax. Hell, a lot of New Who would be changed. There are several points in the timeline where the Doctor might have just straight up died.

Because Jack found the Doctor’s severed hand, and used it to track him. Jack finally catching up to the Doctor caused the Tardis to fly all the way to the end of the universe just to shake him off. This wouldn’t have happened had there been no hand to find. Which means they never would have come across Professor Yana, who wouldn’t have opened the chameleon arch and become the Master and then steal the Doctor’s Tardis. So the entirety of the three-part series 3 finally wouldn’t have happened, since the Master’s still stuck as a human at the end of the universe. (As an aside, The Lazarus Experiment wouldn’t have happened either, since Tish only got the job working for Lazarus because of Saxon. So she wouldn’t have ended up on the news, thus never prompting Francine to call Martha about it.)

Martha likely continued traveling with the Doctor, since she had left to be there with her family after the trauma they endured during the Year That Never Was. They may or may not run into Donna, since without the metacrisis, Dalek Caan doesn’t need to manipulate events surrounding her. Let’s say they do. Turn Left doesn’t happen since events aren’t converging on Donna. But all of reality’s at stake, so Rose would have to find another way of warning the Doctor.

Now, the show could’ve likely ended at series 4, since the metacrisis wouldn’t have happened without the hand, so the whole of reality could’ve ended up destroyed. But let’s assume they find a way to save reality since A) Dalek Caan had set the whole thing up to betray the Daleks anyway, and B) without the hand Ten would’ve regenerated into Eleven, who had managed to save the Earth from the Atraxi in 20 minutes without his sonic or Tardis while dealing with post-regenerative trauma, so he’d probably figure out how to stop Davros. Since there’s no TenToo, the Doctor probably wouldn’t leave Rose at Bad Wolf Bay, so she may end up traveling with him again. This may prompt Martha to leave since she might feel like the third wheel now that the man she fancies has reunited with the woman he loves. Donna would likely stay, since she doesn’t need to have her memory erased.

So we move onto The End of Time, which wouldn’t have happened. Plain and simple. The Master’s still stuck at the end of the universe, so the whole reviving him wouldn’t have happened. The Doctor doesn’t need to stall for time after The Waters of Mars (which probably wouldn’t have ended the way it did, as he’s likely still traveling with Donna and Rose), so he never marries Elizabeth I, so the very end of the Shakespeare Code doesn’t happen either. Liz One still remains the Virgin Queen, and the Doctor doesn’t regenerate, but they’re already Eleven, so...

Since the Tardis doesn’t get completely obliterated by the Doctor regenerating, he doesn’t crash into Amelia Pond’s garden and then end up returning 12 years later due to the Tardis repairing. Maybe different circumstances cause Amy and Rory to become companions, maybe not. If not, then River wouldn’t exist, so Silence in the Library/Forest of the Dead never occurs.

Gonna skip series 6 for a minute and move onto Clara. Since the Master’s still stuck at the end of the universe, Missy isn’t able to give Clara the Doctor’s number. So Clara never travels with the Doctor and jumps into his time stream, becoming Oswin and Victorian Clara, so the Doctor never tries to find her in the first place. She also never ends up dying in the Trap Street. So the Sycorax started the chain of events that led to Clara’s death. The Doctor may have ended up dying in the Dalek Asylum if he hadn’t met Oswin. If he survives, the lack of Amy and Rory means he doesn’t end up in the Victorian period to mourn them, so he doesn’t meet the Great Intelligence. This would also end up changing Classic Who a tiny bit, since Eleven accidentally gave the GI the idea that the London Underground is a “key strategic weakness”, which they use in The Web of Fear. So The Bells of Saint John doesn’t happen either. Neither the GI nor the Doctor have any reason to be there. The Name of the Doctor doesn’t happen either, since the GI doesn’t try to enter the Doctor’s time stream, which means Clara would have no reason to enter it. Paradoxes are confusing.

Even if the Doctor had met the GI in Victorian London, this might mean the GI succeeds at rewriting the Doctor’s timeline. Let’s say he and whoever his companion is manages to find a way and move on.

If TNotD doesn’t happen, or they stop the GI, The Day of the Doctor might still happen. If it doesn’t, then the Time Lords are dead, so we can thank the Sycorax for the Time Lords being alive for a while. It would happen without Ten though, since in canon Ten is somewhere between The Water’s of Mars and The End of Time, so Journey’s End has already happened, and he’s regenerated in this universe. So we have 33% less bickering. Current Companion may still inspire the Doctor to try to save Gallifrey. If that does happen, then the Time Lords would still try to come through the cracks in time, prompting the Silence to try to kill the Doctor, and trying to blow up the Tardis would cause those very cracks in time. Paradoxes are still confusing. They probably wouldn’t be able to kill him at Lake Silencio, since River might not exist if the Doctor hasn’t met Amy. If he has, then that likely goes the same way as canon. If he hasn’t, maybe they would have succeeded in blowing up the Tardis, since the Doctor only noticed the cracks because he met Amy. So the Silence cause the universe to never exist, while simultaneous causing another paradox by preventing the very events that led to them blowing up the Tardis.

If they don’t succeed in erasing the universe, the Doctor would likely stay on Trenzalore longer than he had in canon, since he doesn’t need (or rather, doesn’t think he needs) more regenerations yet. He still thinks he’s got one left. He may end up regenerating into Twelve while on Trenzalore, which may end up triggering the whole gifting-the-Doctor-more-regenerations thing at some point down the line. So then we end up with Thirteen.

Post-Trenzalore, the Doctor doesn’t meet Missy. The Master’s still stuck at the end of the universe, and even if they weren’t, the Doctor doesn’t know Clara, so Danny’s death (if it even happens) doesn’t cause them to search for the afterlife.

Assuming DotD happens, since the Master’s still stuck at the end of the universe, Simm!Master wouldn’t have been able to leave Gallifrey, and never got stuck on the Monasian ship where he encountered the Doctor and Missy. So he never regenerates into Missy, and the Doctor never goes to the Mondasian ship to test Missy’s ability to be good. The Doctor Falls never happens, and Bill never gets turned into a Cyberman. This also means she never gets turned into a Pilot by Heather, so she never gets to go on adventures with her space girlfriend. The Doctor might have never even met Bill, since they’re not guarding the vault at St. Luke’s University. The Doctor doesn’t regenerate, but she’s already Thirteen, so...

Since they don’t regenerate, the Doctor doesn’t fall out of the Tardis and meet the Fam. Series 11 doesn’t happen.

Since the Master was never on the Mondasian ship, they never regenerate into the Dhawan!Master. So they never go back to Gallifrey and hack into the Matrix, learning about the Timeless Child. The Master doesn’t kill the Time Lords. So the Sycorax started the chain of events that led to the Time Lord’s death. The Doctor may or may not find out later, depending on whether the Time Lords keep “granting” them more regenerations just to keep the secret.

TL;DR: The Sycorax are responsible for every bad thing that’s happened to the Doctor from series 3 onward, paradoxes are super confusing, and the Doctor needs to up their sword fighting skills.

To quote Mabel Pines: “Time travel, man! Why you gotta be so complicated?”

[thelittlesttimelord]

The Littlest Timelord: The Death of the Doctor Chapter 12

TITLE: The Littlest Timelord: The Death of the Doctor Chapter 12 PAIRING: No Pairing RATING: T CHAPTER: 12/? SUMMARY: The Doctor’s death is looming on the horizon and Elise is growing every day. What the Doctor doesn’t know is that he has 200 years to teach Elise all he knows. Amy, Rory, and River let Elise in on their secret, because River knows she will keep it. What will Elise do when he’s gone?

[A/N - I’ve been waiting for this chapter because it has one my favorite moments that I’ve ever written in it.]

As the Doctor, Amy, Rory, and Elise were exploring they heard, “Thief!”

“Shush, shush, shush,” the Doctor said as they stopped.

“So, as soon as the TARDIS is refueled, we go, yeah?” Rory asked.

“No. There are Time Lords here. I heard them and they need me.”

“You told me about your people, and you told me what you did,” Amy said.

Elise didn’t understand what they were talking about.

“Yes, yes, but if they're like the Corsair, they're good one and I can save them.”

“And then tell them you…?” Amy trailed off looking at Elise. She knew the Doctor still hadn’t told her about what he had done.

“I can explain. Tell them why I had to.”

“You want to be forgiven.”

“Don't we all?”

Amy nodded. “What do you need from me?”

“My screwdriver. I left it in the TARDIS. It's in my jacket.”

“You're wearing your jacket,” Rory commented.

“My other jacket.”

“You have two of those? Can’t you just use Elise’s?”

“Hers doesn’t have all the apps I need.”

“Okay, I'll get it. But Doctor, listen to me. Don't get emotional because that's when you make mistakes,” Amy told him.

He gave her a lazy salute. “Yes, boss.”

Amy tossed him her mobile phone. “I'll call you from the TARDIS. Rory, look after him.” Amy walked off.

“Rory, look after her.”

The Doctor and Elise continued exploring.

“Daddy?” Elise asked.

“Yes Ellie?”

“What happened to the Timelords?”

The Doctor froze in his tracks. He’d been avoiding that question for years now.

“You always say that we’re the last of the Timelords. How is that possible?”

The Doctor knelt down in front of her. “Elise, you have to understand something. What I did…”

Elise looked at him confused.

“Do you remember the Naismith Mansion?”

Elise nodded.

“You escaped something called the Timelock. It was a device designed to trap the Time War in a moment. We can never go back to Gallifrey because it doesn’t exist anymore. There are only two Timelords left in the universe. Me and you.” The Doctor watched as her blue eyes filled with tears.

“So they’re all gone? Everyone?”

“I’m sorry.” Elise sniffled and wiped her face, trying to hold back the tears. Her entire family, all her friends. They were all gone and she’d never see them again.

The Doctor wrapped his arms around her as she started crying. “I am so sorry,” he told her.

Elise tried pulling away from him, hitting him on the chest and shoulders.

The Doctor continued to hold her as she let out her anger and sadness. He never meant to do this to her. He never thought he’d have to face the result of his decision. If he regretted what he had done before, he regretted it even more knowing that he taken everything from the girl he now called his daughter.

The Doctor pulled her away from him to look her in the eye. “Ellie, listen to me. What I did, I did to stop it all. I regret it every minute of every day. I ask myself if I could have done something differently. I know apologies will never bring them back, but you are the most important thing to me. You are my entire universe. I’d never forgive myself if something happened to you. As long as I am alive, I will protect you.”

Elise sniffled and he kissed her head.

Amy’s phone started ringing in the Doctor’s pocket. He stood up and answered it. “Yeah, it's around somewhere. Have a good look.” He pulled his sonic screwdriver out of his jacket and pressed the button, locking the TARDIS door.

Elise and the Doctor continued to search House.

“Come on. Where are you? Now, where are you all? Where are you?” the Doctor asked. He closed his eyes and honed in on the whispers of the Timelords. He pulled back a curtain and revealed a small alcove. “Well, they can't all be in here.”

Elise could hear the voices now.

The Doctor opened a cupboard and found the message boxes.

“Please do you read me?” “Structural integrity failure. Damage to dimensional stabilizer.” “If you can hear, come and help.”

Elise didn’t recognize any of the voices, but her hearts broke for them.

Auntie and Uncle came up behind them.

“Just admiring your Timelord distress signal collection. Nice job. Brilliant job. Really thought I had some friends here, but this is what the Ood translator picked up. Cries for help from the long dead.” The Doctor turned to face them. “How many Timelords have you lured here the way you lured me, and what happened to them all?”

“House. House is kind and he is wise,” Auntie said.

“House repairs you when you break! Yes, I know!”

Elise could tell the Doctor was becoming increasingly angry.

“But how does he mend you?” He scanned Uncle. “You've got the eyes of a twenty year old.”

“Thank you.”

“No. Oh, no, I mean it literally. Your eyes are thirty years younger than the rest of you.” He pulled off Uncle’s hat, revealing two mismatched ears. “Your ears don't match, your right arm is two inches longer than you're left, and how's your dancing? Because you've got two left feet. Patchwork people. You've been repaired and patched up so often, I doubt there's anything left of what used to be you. I had an umbrella like you once.” The Doctor grabbed Auntie’s forearm.

It had the same tattoo as the box. A snake eating its tail.

“Oh, now, it's been a great arm for me, this.��

“Corsair.”

“He was a strapping big bloke, wasn't he, Uncle?”

“Big fellow,” Uncle agreed.

“I got the arm and then Uncle got the spine and the kidneys.”

“Kidneys.”

“You gave me hope, and then you took it away. That's enough to make anyone dangerous. God knows what it will do to me. Basically, run!”

Auntie took off.

“Poor old Timelord. Too late. House is too clever,” Uncle told them. He walked off as Amy’s phone started ringing.

“Timelord stuff. Needed you out of the way. The boxes will make you angry. How could she know? Stay put. Stay exactly where you are.” He hung up and took off running.

They found Idris sitting there in a cage.

The Doctor walked up to the bars. “How did you know about the boxes? You said they'd make me angry. How did you know?”

“Ah, it's my thief and my little survivor.”

“Who are you?”

“It's about time.”

“I don't understand. Who are you?”

“Do you not know me? Just because they put me in here?”

“They said you were dangerous.”

“Not the cage, stupid. In here.” Idris raised up on her knees and put her hands on her face. “They put me in here.” She placed her hands on the bars and looked up at him, her face framed by the bars. “I'm the… Oh, what do you call me? We travel. I go…”

The sound of the TARDIS came out of her mouth.

“The TARDIS?” the Doctor asked.

Elise smiled. That’s why she felt so familiar!

“Time and Relative Dimension in Space. Yes, that's it. Names are funny. It's me.” Idris stood up. “I'm the TARDIS.”

The Doctor turned away from her and paced. “No, you're not. You're a bitey, mad lady. The TARDIS is up and downy stuff in a big blue box.”

“Yes, that's me. A Type Forty TARDIS. I was already a museum piece when you were young, and the first time you touched my console you said…”

“I said you were the most beautiful thing I had ever known.”

“And then you stole me. And I stole you.”

“I borrowed you.”

“Borrowing implies the intention to return the thing that was taken. What makes you think I would ever give you back?”

The Doctor slowly turned back to her. “You're the TARDIS?”

“Yes.”

“My TARDIS?”

Elise hit him on the leg.

“Sorry. Our TARDIS”.

“My Doctor and my little Survivor. Oh. We have now reached the point in the conversation where you open the lock.” Idris stepped back from the bars and the Doctor soniced the cage door. Idris stepped out and walked up to the Doctor. “Are all people like this?” she asked.

“Like what?”

“So much bigger on the inside. I'm…Oh, what is that word? It's so big, so complicated. It's so sad.”

“But why? Why pull the living soul from a TARDIS and pop it in a tiny human head? What does it want you for?”

Idris circled the Doctor, sniffing him. “Oh, it doesn't want me.”

“How do you know?”

“House eats TARDIS’s.”

“House what? What do you mean?”

“I don't know. It's something I heard you say.”

“When?”

“In the future.”

“House eats TARDIS’s?”

Elise giggled at their back and forth. It almost like watching him and River go at it.

“There you go.” Idris put her finger on his lips. “What are fish fingers?”

“When do I say that?” “Any second.” She took her finger off his lips.

“Of course. House feeds on rift energy and TARDIS’s are bursting with it. And not raw, all lovely and cooked. Processed food. Mmm, fish fingers.”

“Do fish have fingers?”

“But you can't eat a TARDIS. It would destroy you. Unless, unless…”

“Unless you deleted the TARDIS Matrix first.”

The Doctor laughed. “So it deleted you.”

“But House can't just delete a TARDIS's consciousness. That would blow a hole in the universe. So he pulls out the Matrix, sticks it in a living receptacle and then it feeds off the remaining Artron energy.” Idris gasped. “You were about to say all that. I don't suppose you have to now.”

“I sent Amy and Rory in there. They'll be eaten.” The Doctor pulled out Amy’s phone and flipped it open. “Amy! Amy? Rory? Get the hell out of there!” He took off running, leaving Elise with Idris.

“Are you really the TARDIS?” she asked.

“Of course I am.”

“What color is my blanket?”

“It’s blue of course. With gold threads in the shape of the stars.”

Elise smiled and hugged Idris.

Idris stroked Elise’s brown hair. She loved the little Timelord like the Doctor did.

As a daughter.

[hotdog-frenchfries]

13 meeting some of her previous companions? Maybe Amy and Rory? 😊

Thank you so much! Ik it's not perfect and it might not be what you were expecting, but here you go:

“Doctor! What’s happening?” Yaz yelled, grabbing onto the TARDIS control console, as the TARDIS hurtled its way through space. “The TARDIS is taking us somewhere.” The Doctor shouted, scrambling to her feet. “Where?” Yaz cried. “I’m not sure. She obviously thinks we’re needed somewhere.” Confused, the Doctor attempted to get to the console, as the floor shifted, pulling her to the ground again. Gradually, the TARDIS halted to a stop. The Doctor slowly got up and made her way to the door, with Yaz following her. She poked her head round the door. They were on the roof of an old, abandoned hotel in the middle of the night. The wind was blowing fiercely, making her long coat fly out from behind her. Carefully, the Doctor made her way to the edge of the roof. In front of her, she could see tall skyscrapers looming from the streets. They were in New York in 1940. This city was filled with so many memories: she recalled climbing up the Empire State Building with Ian, Barbara and Vicki, defeating the Cult of Skaro with Martha and teaming up with Lucy and Grant aka The Ghost to battle Shoal of the Winter Harmony with Nardole. Most recently, she had met Nikola Tesla with Yaz, Ryan and Graham and ended up fighting the Skithra. However, no matter how many adventures she had in this city, New York would always be a painful reminder of the night she had lost the Ponds to the Weeping Angels. It just so happened that the TARDIS had brought them to the very hotel where Amy and Rory were being held. 1940, that meant they had been trapped for two years. Why had the TARDIS brought her here? Were the Ponds in danger? “Doctor,” The sound of Yaz’s voice jolted her out of her reverie. “Are we in New York? What year is this?” The Doctor turned to her quickly. “Yaz, listen to me. We are in New York, in the year 1940. I’ve been to this hotel before, with some friends, only it was in 1938, and they didn’t make it back with me. I need you to stay close to me. I can’t lose you too. This hotel is guarded by Weeping Angels, one of the most dangerous species in the universe. They take the form of stone statues and are quantum-locked, which means that they can only move when unseen. But they’re extremely fast, which is one of the reasons they’re so dangerous. If you see a statue, any statue, don’t turn your back and don’t blink.” Yaz nodded. Although, she rarely mentioned them, Yaz knew that the Doctor had lost many close to her before she had started travelling with her. Part of her wished that the Doctor would open up to her, Yaz knew better than to open up old wounds, but she couldn’t stand how the Doctor blamed herself for all the deaths, especially when she had done so much to save others. She was often reminded that one day, Yaz too could get herself hurt or killed, whilst travelling with the Doctor, but she knew the risks and that she would never leave the Doctor, if she could help it. “Why did the TARDIS bring us here?” Yaz asked. “I don’t know. I think that my friends, the ones I lost, might be in danger.” The Doctor answered. “We need to get inside the hotel.” “You mean, they’re still alive?” Yaz responded, confused. It wasn’t like the Doctor to abandon her friends when they could still be saved. She wondered what had happened at this hotel. “The Angels rarely kill. Instead, once they get close to you, they send you back in time and feast upon your time energy like parasites. I did try to save them – the Ponds – my friends, however the Angels got them in the end. To save them would have created a time paradox, and they told me not to risk it.” “Tell me about them, the Ponds.” Yaz asked. “They were a couple – Amy and Rory. Amy was brave and kind and adventurous. She was determined, she would rarely give up on anything, she put her mind to. Rory was honest and compassionate and protective. He had so much empathy, and would never have abandoned anyone. They were so loyal and would have gone to the ends of the Earth for each other. One time, Amy was trapped in this box called the Pandorica and Rory protected her for 2000 years. It was only supposed to be Rory trapped in this hotel, but Amy refused to let him be trapped alone.” The Doctor smiled sadly. “Anyway, enough stories, we need to find a way into this hotel.”. Carefully, Yaz and the Doctor climbed down the stairs on the side of the hotel, until the Doctor told Yaz to stop at a certain floor. Using her sonic screwdriver, the Doctor opened the window and crawled through, Yaz following her. They had ended up in a corridor of doors. On each door was a name, Yaz assumed that each door led to a hotel room, where each of the Weeping Angel’s victims were being held captive. “We need to find the door labelled Rory Williams.” The Doctor told Yaz, as they crept through the corridor, glancing at each door. “It’s here.” Yaz gestured to one of the doors. Silently, the Doctor opened the door. “Who’s there?” A female voice with a Scottish accent asked, making Yaz jump. “Amy?” the Doctor breathed. “Who are you and how do you know my wife’s name?” a male voice asked. The lights suddenly turned on. Yaz could see a tall, pretty woman, a couple of years older than herself, with long red hair and dark hazel eyes, standing behind a man, about the same age, with light brown hair and eyes. The Doctor’s face broke into a huge smile, Yaz couldn’t remember the last time she had seen the Doctor this happy. “Amy, Rory, it’s me! I’m the Doctor!” “You’re not the doctor,” the man, who Yaz assumed was Rory, said. “For one, you’re a woman.” “Of course, regeneration, I have a new face. Please Ponds, it is me!” The Doctor turned to Amy. “Amy, my TARDIS crashed into your garden when you were a child. You were praying for Santa to fix the crack in your wall. You invited me in and we ate fish fingers and custard! Rory, you used to think I was just Amy’s imaginary friend, the Raggedy Doctor. Then I came back, and we got Prisoner Zero back into its prison. I haven’t seen you since you were captured by the Weeping Angels, but now I’ve come back. I know I look different but I am the Doctor!” Amy stepped forwards from behind Rory. “Doctor, it is you!” she cried, running up to her and giving the Doctor a hug. The Doctor’s smile grew, it felt so good to be back with the Ponds! “Who is she” asked Rory, gesturing to Yaz. “Oh, of course!” The Doctor let go of Amy and moved so the Ponds could see Yaz properly. “This is Yaz, we travel together. She helped me to get inside the hotel and find you.” Yaz waved shyly. “Hi. I’ve heard so much about you.” “Hi Yaz, thank you for looking after the Doctor.” Amy smiled friendlily and Rory nodded gratefully. The Doctor rolled up her sleeve to reveal a vortex manipulator. “Who wants to go on a trip?” “Is that possible, Doctor? What about the Angels?” asked Amy. “Don’t worry about them. Come along Ponds and Yaz!” answered the Doctor. Together, the Doctor, Yaz, Amy and Rory journeyed across time and space, visiting famous people and old friends, such as Queen Nefititi and the Paternoster gang and planets such as New Earth and Akhaten. However, like all journeys, it had to come to an end and Yaz and the Doctor had to say goodbye to Amy and Rory. “Before we go, do you know, if River is safe?” Amy asked the Doctor, part of her afraid of the answer. “She is saved to the largest database in the universe, with her friends. I’m sorry, I couldn’t do more, but I promise you River is safe and that she is happy” answered the Doctor, quietly. “The last time I saw her I took her to the Singing Towers of Daryllium and we were together for 24 years. She’s safe, but it’s impossible for me to see her again.” “Thank you, Doctor. Thank you for looking after her for us. I know it must be so painful for you, as it is for us, but thank you for making sure she’s safe.” Rory responded, his voice breaking. “I’m sor-” the Doctor began. “Don’t be,” Amy said, softly. “We know you must have done everything you could have done. That’s all we could have asked of you.” Yaz hung back as the Doctor said her farewells. She had enjoyed her journey with the Ponds but she knew it would be hard for the Doctor, leaving them again. Amy and Rory came towards her. “Look after her for us, please.” Amy said, her voice low. “I will.” Yaz promised. “I’m so glad I met you both.” They hugged, for the last time. The Doctor made her way to the TARDIS. She already felt the Ponds’ absence, but she was glad she had spent this time with them. Since the Master had revealed to her about her past, that she was the Timeless Child, she had been feeling confused and angry about how the Time Lords had used her, but seeing the Ponds and introducing them to Yaz, had made her feel a lot better. She wondered why the TARDIS had brought her here. Her conversation with Idris echoed in her mind. “You didn’t always take me where I wanted to go.” “No, but I always took you where you needed to go.” Perhaps the TARDIS had known that a part of her had needed to see the Ponds again.

[mochisis]

Emotions of the Mind: Ringo Starr x Reader

 Summary: You’re having a very tough moment so your boyfriend, Ringo, comforts you and decides to spend the night with you, since he is very worried for you. Especially when you have a nightmare in the middle of the night. 

Warnings: Angst, bullying, fluff, and nightmares

Enjoy this crap!

This past week has been very hard for you since the death of your dog from the age of six. Macy had been the best animal in your life but now she’s gone. She’s moved on to the final stage of life: death. It’s a very hard thing to go through since she’s been in your life ever since she was a puppy, ‘till she was fourteen. You really did love her. 

  You sat there back against your bedroom wall, hands on your face. Your heavy breaths make you gain more anxiety. What if another family animal dies? What if it’s a friend, or even worse, a relative. You remind yourself to just take some deep breaths, but it was no use. You just sob harder and negativity just travels into your head. 

  ‘Why Macy’, you thought to yourself. ‘Why Macy? WHY MACY? WHY DID SHE HAVE TO BE TAKEN AWAY FROM ME?’  Your crying was becoming more and more viscous from just thinking about it. Like, for god sake, why is this causing so much pain inside your body. Every part  of your body was aching in fear. What was happening to you? Why was this getting to you so much?

  Suddenly, you feel two arms wrapped around your hips. It was your boyfriend Ringo. He had heard your loud sobs in your room after your mom had let him in. He hated what he saw. It just broke his heart to see you so broken into pieces. It makes his heart drop to his stomach. “Oh Y/N, it’s okay. You don’t have to worry anymore, because I’m here,” Ringo’s soft voice whispered in your ear, trying to soothe you. You sob into his suit that he was wearing after he had a gig with Rory Storm and the Hurricanes. He rubbed the small of your back and that seemed to calm you down a bit, but tears were still leaking out of your eyes. He gently grabbed your chin so he could get a better look of how you damaged yourself. 

  “Love, what happened that had gotten you like this?” he asked in a tone full of sadness. You finally respond with a ten second hesitation. 

  “It’s Macy,” you said with a shaky voice. 

  “What about her, Love?” he confusly asked. 

  “Sh..She’s...SHE’S DEAD!” you finally shouted out. Ringo looked at you with a sad look on his face. “Your dog, Macy?”

  “YES, MACY! THE DOG I HAD HAVE EVER SINCE CHILDHOOD! SHE’S GONE!” 

  “Oh no. Y/N I’m so sorry to hear that. She was such a great dog and I know that time flows by so fast, but don’t worry, because she’s in a better place now.” 

   You smiled a little with tears still running down your face. Ringo pets your soft hair and pulls you into his beating chest. He then gets up and makes your bed a little pulling the blanket a little. He lays down on your comfy bed and pats the large spot next to him. 

  “I can’t wait here forever, Baby Girl. Come and join me and we can have a snuggle,” he says, calling you by your pet name. You decide to just get in bed with your lovable boyfriend, who your mother trusts. You get under the blankets and Ringo starts holding you tight and doesn’t let you go. You trust him with all of your heart to not do anything sketchy. 

  You two remained like this for a while until he breaks the silence by making a request. 

“Umm...Y/N?” he asks. 

 “Hmh,” you hummed answering. 

 “You don’t mind if I spend the night do you?” 

You take a moment to think and slightly nod your head. “But I should ask my mum first,” you suggest. “But then what about your stuff? 

 “Ah no worries, Love. I’ll just run back to my place: It’s only a mile away.” 

You nod at his response. “Do you want to go now?” 

  “I guess so. That way we have more time to cuddle, yeah?”

 “Okay.” 

Before he gets up, he kisses the top of your head. You felt so lucky to have such a guy like him and before he exits the room, he blows you a kiss. “I’ll be right back, Love. Don’t let anyone or anything bother you too much, okay?” 

  “Yes babe,” you muttered. 

     ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

   You walk back home from school. The sun was hiding in the clouds which makes it a cloudy day like usual in Liverpool. Your neighborhood was quiet as usual. You after school walk back home was fine, until you hear someone calling your name. 

 “Oi, Y/L/N!” You turn around and to see that it was your school bully, Britany was walking towards you with an evil look on her face. You wait for her to make her way to the spot you were standing. You assumed that you must have done something that she deserved that got her so angry. She finally reaches to where you’re standing and starts to blurt out, “I heard yah snitched on me for looking at you while you were in the restroom! Yah know that is a complete lie and I had never done anything wrong to you in my life!”  

    You thought of what she had just said.  Oh no she did not just say that. No she just not just made up a lie like that. She had been bullying you throughout your whole life, and now she thinks that she can just make stuff up like it never happened?! You just stand there, ice cold without an idea of what to attempt next. Staring at the ground won’t do anything, because you see her raise your hand and when you look up, she quickly whips her hand against your face. You were so surprised when she had just slapped you; it stung so bad. You never thought you would do it, but the only defense you can come up with is pushing Britany to the ground. 

  Why was she so surprised though? She has just slapped you, so why is she speechless when you had pushed her to the ground? You notice that she quickly gets back up, that’s where you two start a fight in your neighborhood. She starts attacking you by fist punches to your shoulder. You felt weak. You felt like you needed backup. You needed your boyfriend, Ringo, to join in and help you get out of this chaotic mess. 

 Ringo? Where are you? Please help me. I’m scared. I feel weak. I can’t stand up for myself. RINGO WHERE ARE YOU?  I need you-

   You then remember that he had a gig after school. He couldn’t be there. He was somewhere else performing a gig. So he could hear you. He couldn’t come to your side and save you from this girl who was beating you up. 

  Ringo! Where are you? Ringo. Ringo! RINGO, I CAN’T DO THIS ALONE! SHE’S GOING TO KILL ME!!!

RINGO!!!

Y/N!

It took a few shakes and calls from Ringo to wake you up, but your pool of tears were forbidding you from waking up. 

   “Y/N, please wake up. You’re suffering,” your boyfriend says, shaking you awake. You have finally awakened from that traumatic experience that you had had in your sleep. Still sobbing, you look at your boyfriend, and he looks very worried for you. 

  “Dear, are you okay?” he asks you with heavy sadness. You look down, your breathing was very shaky from tears. He felt so awful for you that he brought you in his arms. 

  “I’m...s-so sorry,” you sobbed. 

  “Hey, hey, you’re okay. It was just a nightmare, but it’s over now, Darling.” Ringo cooed.  You cry into his night clothes as he rubs you back, gently to soothe you. You start to settle down which makes him smile a bit. 

  “I promise that I won’t let anything happen to you, Angle: deeply.” 

You believed him. You went back to sleep and nothing bad had ever happened to you in your sleep throughout the rest of the night. 

[trashy-croud]

Jungle - India 🗺️🐒

So, where do we start? So I did initially start this game with the Manor run, seeing how well I did the assault course and the driving and I did pretty okay. I mean, I remember them clear as day as this croft manor was the one I played the most as a child on the PC, whilst my dad was at work so I didn't lose his progress. After getting used to all the controls again, and finding out there was a sprint button, I decided to start this game up for real. I won't say much about croft manor, may look at it more after all of this but I'll focus on the main story for now.

So let’s begin on this new adventure with Lara. In the very beginning cutscene, before the menu appears, we see a meteor crashing onto Earth. It landed in Antarctica, had to look this up, as during the time it crashed, Antarctica was tropical. This very first cinematic is set over a million years ago, long before our little adventurer had anything to do with it. As we move onto the present day, we’re in the Antarctica that we all known and love to well as there seems to be some people doing research there, some digging and whatnot. One man who is there is named Willard, he’s totally not the bad guy. I sweaaar.  Anywho a lot of the machinery goes wrong, from what I can tell, they basically made a discovery of a set of stone heads, very much like the ones on Easter Island in Antarctica. It is a huuuge wild ride in one cutscene alone! And then we are shown at the end, the discovery of a handmade grave/post/thing, for one Mr Paul Caulfield. I suppose he’s going to have quite the impact on our adventure and like Willard says, "This place has a busy history." I don’t think he’s too far from the tree, ya know.

So after all that, we finally begin, woo, finally talking about the first level of this game and boy, was I struggling to get used to this and had to go through it several times to obtain all the secrets. Yes, I know about you “All Hallows” and I will not make the same mistake as I did in the previous game! So in this first level, we start off in India, off in the jungles. It doesn’t specify where precisely, we’ll perhaps get more information on all of that as we progress further through these few levels, but all I know is that things have changed and boy, do I gotta talk about them!

So for starters, we have a mixed save system. Playing on the playstation, I don’t get unlimited saves like on the PC or like the second instalment of the game, well, not anymore. Instead we have a combination of the first game with the save crystals and the second game with getting to save whenever we please. But, now we have limitations on the saves, which means someone is going to have to be extra careful with her saves from now on and not waste all of her save crystals carelessly~ Note to self: if they are anything like the flares or how many times I saved in the previous game, these crystals will not be lasting long.

Also, I don’t have a button to use my flares constantly either. I have to actually open my backpack up and then think, I have to think about whether I need them or not. Do we understand how this is a mind-blowing mechanic for someone like me who wasted them all in the early levels of the game and never got them again?! On one hand, it’s super helpful for people like me, but on the other hand, it’s also annoying because I can’t access them within a second of needing them. So you know, there are pros and cons to this little feature. But I will have to adapt!

Final note before I actually talk about the level itself. Heh. Secrets. I mentioned earlier that I was going to collect them all to get the secret level but did I mention that it’s not like the second game anymore? I’m so used to the idea I only have to collect three secrets that when it popped up with the statistics screen, when it said “3 of 6″, I think I about lost it? Like, it’s gone back to the first instalment’s idea of secrets, which I ain’t complaining about. It just threw a huge spanner in the works and goes to show that this is going to take ten times longer for me to complete! So don’t expect a finale any time soon! I feel like, in particular levels, I’m going to miss the obviousness which was the dragon statues you had to find previously. I’m sure I’ll complain about it all soon enough, just you wait.

Anyway, right, so let’s actually talk about the level itself! As the first level of this game, it really did not pull any punches. You are literally given three secrets to find at the very start of the level, that later two I found much easier but the first one was so dang hard. Like, I kid you not, I was trying everything, looking everywhere I could and how I was supposed to find this secret was beyond me. Like I was just jumping around on the slope, hoping I’d find something and low and behold, I bloody well did! This was only the beginning of my struggles as the level pressed forward. After finding the first three secrets, which were quite literally one after the other, we’re introduced to something new. And oh dear god, I’m gonna hate it. It’s quicksand! Yaaaay.

After overcoming the quicksand, we met new... enemies? Well, we met some monkeys, but they seem friendly, at least for now but that is bound to change very quickly. Because it’s a Tomb Raider game. And nice enemies don’t happen often. Y’know, like the tigers that try to maul us to death later on and the addition to some new watery enemies, yeah, watery. I used that word. Piranhas. Oh boy, I don’t like this. Water is meant to be my safe zone, although there are sometimes shark and crocodiles/alligators, I can cope. Even with the odd barracuda and the like, I can cope. But piranhas? Oh no. We are done. Because these awkward little swines cannot be killed as far as I know, and I’m ready to absolutely weep at them! But nonetheless, we somehow still trudged on. We’re just plodding along.

We encountered traps like never before, we met boulders and spikes and more boulders, oh and zip lines. Now, you may be thinking, “But Croud, how are zip lines traps? They help you?” And now here’s the part where I prove you wrong because I cannot use zip lines to save my life. The amount of times I died in the floating island level due to zip lines is unreal, and they’re here in this game too? Oh they are certainly classed as traps on my list. You can make sure of that!

To make a long story short this level put me through the works. Like so many works it’s unreal. 

This level did not pull on any punches and really got you involved in it. I thought “The Great Wall” was a wacky trap filled first level, but this. This wasn’t just filled with traps, no, we got multiple routes, more exploration. It felt much less linear yet you still knew the way to go. It almost made the level more expansive? I believe that’s the right way to put it. Was probably the reason this level took me so long. I’ll hopefully make the next post much more structured compared to this one, but right now, I want to just gush over how many flare I have. 34! That’s right, ya girls’ been good with ‘em. It won’t last long so took a picture to commemorate it. 

Over all, I greatly enjoyed this first level, it has truly set a tone for the rest of the game to come. Finished it in style by jumping into more quicksand in the end, which really did make me panic - all before we were given the final cutscene, one where Willard makes his appearance once more, or at least an audio appearance rather than a physical one.

During this last cutscene, Lara comes across a campsite and a radio from which we can hear Willard talking, or better yet, trying to get into contact with someone from this site. That is when we are introduced to the “loon” known as Tony. He did not hold back with our Lara, though I’m sure he was suffering from jungle madness with the way he spoke and his attitude. After going in a bit of a circle with him about how many there were of her, we finally get to the point as to why Lara is in this jungle. The Infada artifact. Finally we get a name for the mysterious artifact we’ve been searching for and it sure does sound mysterious. Though Tony doesn’t seem to agree with us completely, summarising it plainly as “voodoo magic and all that”. Perhaps he has seen it before or witnessed what it can do? Though that summary definitely did not impress our Lara as she was asking about anyone else who could talk to her on a more intellectual level, or without brushing off what she was talking about as just “voodoo magic”.

Tony certainly doesn’t have his way with women, we can see that for certain. And he didn’t impress Lara further with the mention of Randy and Rory, who he said was staying put in that temple. Now that ain’t boding too well. Nor do the last words Tony leaves us with, which are quite literally “die” as he jumps off a ledge, disappearing with giggles galore. He was right when he said the jungle was truly rotting his brain, or perhaps it is actually something else that is causing this? Now as someone who hasn’t played the game, nor gotten further than literally this level alone, this cutscene has always been one to make me believe that Tony ain’t a trustworthy guy, and boy was my gut instincts as a child were right. Because I still don’t trust this giggly arse! 

But now that’s it! At least for now. This has been the jungle levels as we explore more of the India levels, now moving onto the Temple Ruins. This game is giving me a different kind of feeling to the previous instalment and oh god, I’m currently enjoying it. Though I’m petrified because this is new territory. Hopefully we can get all these secrets! But see you all soon in the temple ruins, where we’re sure to meet Randy and Rory, or at east whatever is left of them from the sounds of it?

[infinitefandomimagines]

You Did The Right Thing - Marcus Arguello X Reader

WARNINGS: ANGST, DEATH, VIOLENCE, BLOOD, CURSING, PANIC ATTACK, LOWKEY GRAPHIC

-

Request: can you do and imagine were you and Marcus kill someone(could be and accident) and your freaking out and he calms you down and you end up kissing or something... sorry this is a weird request lol

+

@violentredroses with Marcus! I am dying for some Deadly Class stuff since it's so scarce. Surprise me! xx

-

AUTHORS NOTE: If you send me a request with no specific prompt, or a prompt that is very similar to one already requested I will more than likely combine two requests together! I have a LOT of Deadly Class requests and I will try to get through them as quickly as possible, please be patient! Thank you!

-

You hadn't meant to kill him. But everything was happening so fast, you didn't have much time to think about anything before you clubbed the guy over the head. You'd only meant you knock him out, but in your moment if panic, pure adrenaline and fear took over and you swung a little harder than intended.

But it was self defense, right? He'd attacked Marcus and you at night on your way back to King's Dominion from a date. Held the two of you at gun point in a dark and secluded alley. Marcus tried to fight back, but it only resulted in him being pinned against a brick wall, a gun pressed against his temple, the guy threatening to blow his brains out.

So you picked up the closest thing you could find, a rusty metal pipe, and swung. There was a loud crack when it connected with his head, then he fell to the ground, the gun clattering beside him.

Marcus hurriedly reached for the gun, taking it away from the man's reach, not that it would have mattered, dead men can't fire guns. He kept the gun trained on the guy as he crouched down, placing two fingers on the guy's neck.

"Holy shit," Marcus breathed out, "I think you killed him." He out a breathy kind of 'holy shit I almost died' type laugh. It wasn't that the situation was funny, but he was in shock, and mostly just relieved he was alive.

You however, remained silent, the words 'I think you killed him,' kept replaying in your head. You looked down at your hand holding the pipe, small spots of red were splattered on your hands, sleeves, and bottom of your shirt.

"On the bright side, it looks like you'll be getting an "A" in Master Lin's class," Marcus joked, still slightly in shock, and not fully aware of what was happening behind him, in fact, he'd yet to look back at you.

Your eyes traveled down to the pipe in your hand, the end of it now red and glistening in the low light. Your other hand reached out, grabbing the end of the pipe, touching the warm, thick, substance. You don't really know why you did so, and to be completely honest you didn't really have much control over your actions. Maybe you were just hoping it wasn't actually blood, that you hadn't actually just killed someone.

But the second you pulled your hand back to exam the substance which now covered it, you knew. That was enough to break you out of your shocked state.

Your heart rate instantly shot up, your stomach started feeling uneasy, your hands grew clammy and wouldn't stop shaking, your breathing become more labored and erratic. You threw the pipe to the ground as if it was burning your hands, disgusted by it.

It clattered as it hit the pavement, causing Marcus' head to snap up. He seemed to snap out of his shocked state as well.

"Y/N?" He asked, concern taking over his tone. Your face was pale and you looked like you were two seconds from passing out. Marcus was on his feet in an instant, rushing over to you. He grabbed you shoulders, his eyes scanning your body for any injuries. "Hey, what's wrong? Did he hurt you!?"

Your silence and heavy breathing only caused him to worry more, "You're okay, you're safe now, he's-"

"Dead." You finished, your voice was fragile and shaky. "He's . . . dead," you repeated. Marcus didn't know what to say, mostly because he couldn't figure out if you were just in shock or if you were injured.

"I killed someone . . . Oh God, I killed someone," you whispered, looking up at Marcus with glossy eyes, he looked back at you, scanning your terrified expression.

You looked back down at your blood covered hands started panicking, using the bottom of your shirt you tried and wipe the blood off your hands, but the blood had stained them, and it wouldn't come off. Your efforts grew more erratic and violent. "It won't come off, it won't come off!" you mumbled over and over again.

"Hey. Hey hey hey," Marucs said, his words hurried and panicked. He grabbed your arms, stopping your movements.

"I-I didn't mean to kill him, I-"

"It's okay, you did the right thing, it was self defense, it you hadn't of done anything he would have kill us both. You did the right thing." He assured you, though his efforts were futile.

Master Lin had always said the first kill was the hardest, that it would haunt you, but you'd never realized just how right he was until now.

Your eyes travel down to your victim, his lifeless body laying on the ground, blood leaked from the wound and pooled underneath his head. "Hey," Marcus said, gently cupping your face and forcing you to look at him instead, "Don't look at that-- look at me. Just breathe, alright?"

"Marcus, what did I do?" You whimpered.

His only response was to wrap you in his arms and hold you. As much as he hated to admit it, there wasn't much else he could do, what's done was done. He knew what you were feeling and he hated it, it was the same thing he'd gone through after his own first kill, Rory.

"It's gonna be okay," he whispered into your hair, then placing a kiss on the top of your head. The two of you stayed that way for a while, he held you for as long as it took for you to calm down.

Marcus pulled away, holding you at arms length, his hands resting on your shoulders. "I think we should head back to the school," he said, you nodded in agreement.

Marcus looked down at your blood-stained shirt, you couldn't walk through town like that. He shrugged off his jacket and helped you put it on, zipping it up so that your shirt what hidden.

There was no use trying to hide the body, there was no way Marcus could haul the dead weight by himself, and he definitely wasn't about to ask you to help him considering all you'd been through. He disposed of the metal pipe the best he could and decided it would have to do, he was more worried about your current mental state.

Marcus looked back to you, still slightly shaking, partly from the cold, but mostly from everything that had just happened. He hated seeing you like this and not being able to do anything about it, so he did the next best thing he could, let you know he'd be there for you not matter what.

His hands gently cupped your face as he leaned down and placed a sweet and gentle kiss on your lips. It wasn't long, but it brought warmth and a sense comfort to you. If there was one thing Marcus was always able to do, it was make you feels safe.

"I love you," He stated as his lips left your's, "So much."

"I love you too," you let out softly.

"You'll get through this. I promise, I will be there for you whenever you need me, all you have to do is let me know."

You nodded, whispering a small "Thank you."

"Come on," he said gently, offering out his hand to you, which you took. A small smile graced his lips, "Let's go home."

-

Tag List: @literally-anythin

[singledarkshade]

Settling In

Chapter Thirty – One Year Author’s Note: This is the final chapter of this story. Hope you enjoyed.                                 ********************************************* “So,” Sara said as she, Rip, Ray and Mick looked at the large building the signal they’d picked up earlier that morning was coming from, “Where are we?”

“It’s the testing centre,” Rip said before explaining at the confused looks, “This is where they brought the children recruited so it could be determined whether they should be trained as Time Masters or something else.” He grimaced, “Medical checks were also done here.”

“Rip…” Sara said softly as he looked around.

“I spent about three months here when I was first picked up,” he mused, seeing they were all looking at him confused Rip explained, “Scarring on my lungs from pneumonia plus I was practically starving to death.”

At his dismissive reply the three of them looked at one another worriedly.

“Okay,” Rip broke out of his reverie, “We should split up and see if we can find the location of the SOS signal.”

Sara nodded in agreement.

“You and Mr Rory take the north wing,” Rip said to Sara, before noting to Mick, “You know what to look for. Ray and I will take the south.”

He started walking but before Ray could follow, Mick grabbed his arm.

“Keep an eye on the Englishman, Haircut,” Mick told him, “This place will not be good for him.”

Ray nodded and headed after Rip.

 “This is strange,” Rip mused as they moved through the corridors, “I don’t know where this signal could be coming from or who could possibly be sending it.”

Ray nodded, “Maybe Sara and Mick will be having better luck than we are.”

Rip stopped and tilted his head in thought, “Hold on. We’re in the south wing…I wonder…”

“What?” Ray demanded when Rip trailed off and just stood silently for several minutes.

Finally Rip turned to him, “That signal was sent directly to us, to me. Bringing me to somewhere I haven’t been since I was a child.”

“And?”

Rip took a breath, “My room, the one I was in for the three months I was here, is at the end of this corridor. I wonder…”

Ray shook his head annoyed as Rip trailed off again before walking deliberately along the corridor. Rip pulled his gun before opening the door. Green light spilled out and Ray watched Rip step inside. He ran in when he heard Rip’s gun thud on the floor and a cry of shock emanate from the other man.

“Rip?” he cried finding the former Time Master gasping for air, his back against the wall staring at the bed where, held in a stasis field, lay a little boy. Ray stared at the child asking, “Who is he?”

Rip looked up at Ray, his face ashen with tears filling his eyes, managing to whisper, “Jonas.”

  Sara and Mick charged through the corridors. Ray had called them simply saying they needed to get there now. Reaching the room, they skidded to a halt finding Ray holding onto Rip who appeared to be having a panic attack.

“Rip?” Sara asked gently.

Ray shook his head and motioned her to look at the bed. Confused she stepped closer with Mick and stared at the child on the bed.

“Jonas,” Mick said, his voice soft.

Sara swallowed and let out a short breath before moving over to Rip resting her hand on his cheek making him look at her, “Hey, we’re going take him back to the ship and get him checked out. Okay?” Not waiting for him to reply Sara turned back, “Gideon, please connect to the test centre.”

“I already have, Captain Lance,” Gideon replied, “I have downloaded the information and will remove the stasis field as soon as you are ready.”

Sara turned to check on Rip once more, relieved that he seemed to be calming slightly, “Mick is going to take him back to the ship. Okay?”

“I won’t let anything happen to him,” Mick promised.

Ray nodded letting them know that he’d take care of Rip as long as they took care of Rip’s son.

“Okay, Gideon,” Sara said, “Drop the stasis field.”

The green light disappeared, and Mick slid his arms beneath the unconscious child lifting him gently, holding him securely against his chest before he started back to the ship.

                                  *********************************************

  Rip opened his eyes and grabbed his tablet sitting on the bedside cabinet, “Gideon, show me Jonas.”

Instantly the screen lit up and the live feed of his son fast asleep, cuddled up with his teddy bear completely peaceful under his covers a slight smile on his sweet face appeared before him.

“He’s safe,” Gideon assured him, “And dreaming happily.”

Letting out a sigh, Rip placed the tablet down before dropping his head onto the pillow in relief.

“What were you dreaming about?” Gideon asked.

Rip curled around his pillow, “The day we found him, this time last year.”

“A wonderful day, Captain,” Gideon said, a smile in her voice, “And it has been a good year. You have been a good father to our wonderful little boy. And he’s happy.”

“I know,” he breathed, closing his eyes “But I remember the days without him.”

“Days that are long gone,” she reminded him.

With her comfort, and the knowledge Jonas was safe in the next room, Rip let himself drift off to sleep once more.

  Jonas, completely ignorant of the significance of the day, bounced downstairs to watch his morning cartoons. Rip smiled to see his son, happy and waiting for his breakfast.

“Okay,” Rip placed the bowl of cereal in front of Jonas, “Since I offered to help Adam’s mum and dad get things ready for the party, it means we’re going to go early.”

Jonas grinned.

“So, you get to play with Adam before his party,” Rip continued, “But you also have to make sure you don’t get in the way.”

“I promise I’ll be good, Daddy,” Jonas said solemnly.

With a smile Rip leaned over and kissed the top of his son’s head, “I know you will be.”

They finished breakfast with Jonas and Gideon playing one of the matching games she liked to do with him. They were memory games similar to ones Miranda would play every morning, to keep Jonas’ mind stimulated. Rip knew it allowed Gideon her own time to bond with his son.

Rip tidied up watching Jonas constantly. For some reason the fact that exactly one year before he had found his son again was on his mind and Rip couldn’t stop thinking about that moment. Finding Jonas on the bed in stasis, getting back the most precious part of his life had saved Rip and he knew it. Without Jonas, Rip was well-aware he would still be running about the timeline putting himself in situations that would one day have got him killed.

  Evelyn and Kevin had hired the same soft play centre for Adam’s birthday party that Rip had for Jonas’ birthday. The moment they walked in Adam ran over to them, and Rip let his son take off with his best friend.

“Hi,” Evelyn appeared, “Thank you for coming to help.”

Rip smiled, “Happy to. It also means I don’t have to listen to Jonas ask me continuously when we were coming to the party.”

She chuckled, “Well, I am grateful you’re here. Kevin took Ruth for a drive to get her to go to sleep.”

“And to avoid the hard work?” Rip asked amused,

“Exactly.”

Laughing Rip followed her to the table where all the decorations sat. He watched Jonas run around with Adam as he helped Evelyn blow up balloons and sort party bags.

“Are you okay?” Evelyn asked suddenly.

“Fine,” Rip said quickly turning to look at her, “Why do you ask?”

She frowned slightly, “Because the way you’re watching Jonas. Like you’re afraid he won’t be there the next time you look up.”

Rip sighed softly, “I can’t stop thinking that I lost him.”

“Captain,” Gideon said warningly in his ear, making him realise what he’d said.

“I was working when…” Rip trailed off and took a breath trying to remember for a moment the story they’d given for losing Miranda, “When I got the call about the accident. I thought I’d lost them both. This time last year I found I was wrong.”

Evelyn squeezed his arm, “He’s safe but I understand why you’re a little anxious today.”

“Thank you, Evelyn,” Rip said sincerely, “I can’t tell you how much your friendship has meant to me this past year.”

“Well, you and Jonas are family now,” Evelyn replied, she looked over as the door opened and the party guests arrived, “And the hordes have arrived.”

  Rip sat hidden in the corner with Ruth asleep in his arms while the kids ran around, and the adults chatted. Knowing his aversion to ‘chatting’ with the parents of Jonas’ classmates Evelyn simply handed him Ruth and let him hide in the corner where he could watch over his son.

Jonas and Adam were charging around, laughing and shouting while leading several others in a game.

“You’re troubled, Captain,” Gideon said softly in his ear.

“No,” he breathed, “Just reflecting.”

“About?”

Rip sighed, gently rocking the little girl as she began to fuss in his arms, “Just life in general.”

“Remaining in one place for an entire year is something you have not done in a long time,” Gideon deduced, “Not since your final year in the Academy.”

“Even with Miranda I could only stay for a few days at a time,” Rip murmured sadly, “I never thought I would ever put down roots, other than on the Waverider.”

He sat in silence for several moments watching Jonas.

“Do you miss it, Captain?” Gideon asked, breaking the silence.

“I do,” he said instantly, “My ship, our ship. That was my home and refuge for all those years. The only consolation I have is that you’re still with me.”

Rip could feel her smile at her words, “Always, my dearest Captain.”

  Jonas was fast asleep on the bed beside Adam, who was also out for the count, when Rip stepped into the room. Toy Story, the boys’ favourite film, was playing to itself. After the party Evelyn and Kevin invited them over for dinner, allowing the boys could continue to play. Rip was more than happy to, as he enjoyed their company and was always happy to have Jonas spend time with his best friend.

“Both asleep?” Kevin chuckled as he looked down at their sons, “Well, they spent most of the day bouncing about. I’m surprised they lasted so long.”

Rip smiled, before he lifted Jonas up into his arms. Jonas cuddled into Rip’s shoulder arms and legs automatically wrapping around his daddy. Kevin fixed his son under the covers, who sighed as he cuddled his bear.

Carrying Jonas down to the car Rip turned to his friends, “Tomorrow will be a year since Jonas and I moved here. The others are insisting on throwing a party to celebrate. I know it’s short notice but would you all like to join us.”

“Are you sure?” Evelyn asked, “If it’s a family get together.”

“Family and friends,” Rip said softly, “I’d like you to join us. And Jonas will love having Adam there to play with.”

Evelyn glanced at her husband before nodding, “We’ll be there. What time?”

“After three,” Rip smiled relieved they’d agreed to come, he still found it hard to reach out to people.

Evelyn nodded, “We’ll be there.

“See you tomorrow,” Rip nodded before he carried his unconscious son to the car and heading home.

Carrying Jonas upstairs, Rip quickly changed his son into his pyjamas and eased the pliant little boy under the covers. Kissing Jonas forehead, Rip left him to sleep.

                                  *********************************************

  Rip stood in the kitchen looking out across the garden which was filled with friends and family. Barry, Cisco, Caitlin, Iris, Wally, Jessie, Harry, Lisa, Joe and Cecile, Tina McGee, Evelyn, Kevin, Adam and Ruth, Clarissa and Lily were there as well as Oliver, Felicity, Diggle, Lyla along with Captain Singh and his husband had accepted the invitation to join the party.

“Your family, Captain,” Gideon said softly in his ear, “You should be out there enjoying the celebration with them.”

Rip smiled, “I’m just fixing drinks, Gideon. And I am enjoying my day. It’s gratifying that so many people joined us.”

“Of course they came, Captain,” Gideon told him, amusement in her voice, “Despite yourself sometimes, you have made good friends here.”

Rolling his eyes at her reply, Rip picked up the cups of juice for Adam and Jonas returning to the garden. Once he’d given the boys their drink, he took a seat beside Clarissa and rejoined the conversation.

“Okay, can I have your attention,” Joe spoke up suddenly, standing with his glass in his hand managing to get everyone’s attention, “A year ago today, Rip and Jonas arrived in Central City becoming a part of our already odd extended family.”

Rip lifted Jonas onto his lap hugging him close.

“Although shy and timid around us at first,” Joe continued, “Rip soon came to trust us.”

Laughter filled the garden and Rip tried to frown but couldn’t stop his smile at the good-natured teasing.

“With Rip came Jonas who has become a beloved cousin, nephew and grandson to us all,” Joe said once the laughter died down, “And has brought new friends into our group. I remember standing here several months ago and welcoming you both to our family. Now, I get to stand here when you have become an integral part of this family. As well as tell you how grateful we are to have you with us.”

“Seconded,” Cisco called, hugging Lisa close who smiled up at him.

Hugging Jonas, Rip looked at garden filled with people.

“And I…we are grateful that you took us in,” Rip paused before continuing with a smile, “An extended family was something neither Jonas nor I ever had until we came here,” Rip raised his glass to them all, “To our family.”

As everyone toasted, Rip kissed his son’s head hugging him for a moment before he let the little boy down to run around with his best friend again.

  Looking at the people filling his garden, Rip thought back to the year before when he’d made the decision to stay in this time and place. He remembered deciding logically that staying near the Star Labs team would be a good idea, considering his own unique circumstances if anything happened that would require medical assistance then he would have people who could help him.

It had been a pleasant surprise when Cisco offered his spare room to them, and then how they were adopted by the team. Rip could never have imagined that these people, strangers only twelve months before, becoming his family.

“Hey,” Cisco’s voice interrupted his thoughts, “Are you with us?”

Rip smiled and turned back to the party, “I’m with you.”

                                  ********************************************* Author’s Final Note: I will continue this universe in Family Moments.

[reputayswift]

This is somewhat random and you don't have to answer if you don't want to but which taylor songs remind you of jess x rory?

“You don’t have to answer if you don’t want but —*proceeds to ask the question I’ve been waiting my whole life for*”

Conveniently, I just so happen to have an entire playlist lying around that’s full of Literati songs (in chronological order of the events of the show, ya know, casual) that’s like 80% Taylor songs

But I’ll go in depth below the cut!

Enchanted

“Same old tired lonely place” // “The playful conversation starts, counter all your quick remarks like passing notes in secrecy” 

Not much new happens in the sleepy town of Stars Hollow, until now. Describes their first meeting, in particular that scene where he writes notes in the margins of her book and catches on to her Oliver Twist reference.

Treacherous

“Can’t decide if it’s a choice getting swept away, I hear the sound of my own voice asking you to stay”

The “turn right” scene! She knows she’s with someone else and that she’s getting into a treacherous situation spending alone time with him, but she can’t stop herself from asking him to extend their trip just a little longer.

Style

“It’s been awhile since I have even heard from you” // “I’ve heard that you’ve been out and about with some other girl”

Jess coming back to Stars Hollow, only to be seen out with Shane. Also references coming back together after “crashing down” and they quite literally had a car crash lol.

State of Grace

“I never saw you coming, and I’ll never be the same” // “We are alone just you and me, up in your room and our slates are clean” // “So you were never a saint and I loved in shades of wrong”

Them meeting up in Luke’s apartment after they first start officially dating. Jess is a “”bad boy”” and Rory strung Dean along, but now their slates are clean and they can be together.

You Are In Love

“We kiss on sidewalks, we fight, and we talk”

Self-explanatory. 

The Archer

“I’ve got a hundred thrown out speeches I almost said to you”// “Help me hold onto you”

Jess isn’t accustomed to sticking around and he’s becoming more distant. Also pretty much directly describes the “I have imagined hundreds of different scenarios with a hundred different great last parting lines” monologue. 

Haunted

“You and I walk a fragile line, I have known it all this time” // “Stood there and watched you walk away from everything we had”

They were doomed from the start, Dean is trying to get closer to her again, and the events of the party have caused a rift between them. 

Forever & Always

“I stare at the phone, he still hasn’t called” // “Here’s to silence that cuts me to the core” // “It rains when you’re here and it rains when you’re gone”

The silent treatment between the party and Rory’s graduation. When they’re apart, they’re caught up on each other, when they’re together, disaster ensues. 

Afterglow

“Put you in jail for something you didn’t do” // “Punished you with silence, went off like sirens” // “It’s all me in my head, I’m the one who burned us down”

Jess acknowledging that he’s to blame for blowing up at Rory for his graduation struggles, the first line could also refer to that time Rory assumed he’d gotten in a fight with Dean (Swangate lol). 

You’re Not Sorry

“All this time I was wasting hoping you would come around” // “You don’t have to call anymore I won’t pick up the phone” // “You’ve got your share of secrets and I’m tired of being last to know and you’re asking me to listen cause it’s worked each time before”

The graduation phone call, Rory not knowing about him not being able to graduate, the scene where he asks if they can sit down and talk (aka the “I love you” scene)

Death By A Thousand Cuts

“I take the long way home, I ask the traffic lights if it’ll be alright” // “I see you everywhere the only thing we share is his small town” // “I look through the windows of this love, even though we boarded them up”

Jess and Rory running into each other but not being able to talk to each other. Jess confessing his love for her (also big revival energy). Jess leaving again immediately. 

All You Had To Do Was Stay

“All I know is that you drove us off the road” // “Why’d you have to go and lock me out when I let you in” // “Here you are now, calling me up, but I don’t know what to say” // “Let me remind you this was all you wanted (you ended it), you were all I wanted, but not like this”

The graduation phone call and “I love you” scenes again. “You were all I wanted, but not like this,” you and me both Rory, you and me both. 

The Last Time

“Find myself at your door just like all those times before, I’m not sure how I got there, all roads they lead me here” // “You wear your best apology but I was there to watch you leave, and all those times I let you in just for you to go again” // “This is the last time I say it’s been you all along, this is the last time I let you in my door, this is the last time I won’t hurt you anymore”

QUITE LITERALLY the “run away with me I’m ready now I’ve always loved you!!” scene.

Sad Beautiful Tragic

“Words, how little they mean, when you’re a little too late” // “You’ve got your demons and darling, they all look like me” // “Distance, timing, breakdown, fighting, silence, this train runs off its tracks, kiss me, try to fix it, could you just try and listen? Hang up, give up”

Jess telling Rory he loves her a little too late, seeing a girl he thought was her, a summary of their entire relationship, basically. 

Holy Ground

“Back to a first-glance feeling on New York Time, back when you fit in my poems like a perfect rhyme” // “We had this big wide city all to ourselves” // “For the first time I had something to lose” // “Sometimes I wonder how you think about it now and I see your face in every crowd”

Reminiscing on the New York trip, Rory was the first thing Jess had to lose. 

I Wish You Would

“I wish you would come back, wish I never hung up the phone like I did” // “We’re a crooked love, in a straight line down, makes you wanna run and hide but it makes you turn right back around”

More reminiscing, Jess was constantly leaving and returning. 

The Way I Loved You

“He calls exactly when he says he will, he’s close to my mother, talks business with my father, he’s charming and endearing and I’m comfortable” // “You were wild and crazy, just so frustrating, intoxicating, complicated, got away by some mistake”

Comparing her relationship with Logan to her relationship with Jess.

Hope that answers your question lol!!