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#but it is very much no Canon Compliant lol
creativly-anxious · 1 year
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Just some Shitty Teens getting into some Mischief
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revvywevvy · 23 days
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ive been into time loops lately idk what it is about them that just has me so. RRRRRRRRR.
anyways this is myrelle/c-311 and shes a silly little LOSER who got backrooms'd into the pressure universe from classic era roblox and is now stuck in a time loop of which there seems to be no end (spoiler the escape criteria is freeing everybody from the blacksite like its some un/dert/ale pacifist type shit not that anybody involved knows that yet) and she and sebby are friends besties even(?) friendsies.
backstory blurb transcript/more complete entity(/monster) logs under the cut
{ Backstory transcript }
'C-311 is a resident not of this reality. A Robloxian citizen of the early 2000's, C-311 had one day tripped and no-clipped from one world to the next by chance. Mere days after entering this new realm, C-311 was arrested and falsely convicted of murder, having been mistaken for the true culprit and sentenced harshly. 93 days into her sentence, her cellmate forged her signature for 'The Expendable protocol', not wanting to partake themselves but also wishing to be rid of the 'nuisance' in their cell. Having minimal option and seeing the perks of success, she ended up accepting her circumstances and departing with Urbanshade employees, hoping to perhaps find the time to find a way back home. She would come to regret this decision, as she would be killed early on into the expedition. Yet, she would then have a strange 'dream' post-mortem before awakening back on that day, just hours prior to the expedition- with all memory of the beings that lurked intact. Not even this knowledge could quell the ever-present terror. An un-ending nightmare, things would merely repeat. However… she would soon learn that even escape proved futile. Luckily for her, she wasn't the only one trapped, memories of the incessant loop untouched.'
{ More Complete (Relationship?) Logs }
Z-13 { The Saboteur / Sebastian Solace } : 'Sebastian viewed her like any other expendable initially, however, became suspicious upon experiencing a time-reset of sorts upon her first death. This suspicion grew with the deaths, him quickly linking the time-resets to the deaths. This suspicion then became coupled with annoyance and irritation as these deaths intervened with his search for an escape from the Blacksite- due to any research he'd gain being revoked upon reset, essentially sending him back to square one every time. He did NOT like how this seeming little coward, someone who was nothing like the typical criminals who passed, was the difference between progress and a total halt in any plans. Even worse, there was nothing he could do about it. If he killed her himself- a reset. If he tried to snatch her up, her PDG would be detonated immediately. If she escaped, he'd most likely be trapped forever. As nice as a challenge was, this was not that. It was just impossible!
However, a good chunk of this irritation was quelled upon finally meeting her face to face. (Not all of it, obviously.) She was quick to recognize him from those post-mortem 'dreams', and upon learning that he was also privy to the time loop became immensely apologetic. She was thankful for the information he'd been giving her regarding the monsters lurking, and to his surprise, was more than willing to turn over ALL of his data scavenged, even if there was nothing in return. Though, it was rather pointless if any deaths reset everything anyway. He pondered that he could keep the data if she lived, but if she escaped the Blacksite, then, again, his time could very well run out just as quickly as she would depart. C-311 felt awful knowing Sebastian was trapped down there, and was stuck in such an impossible situation- and naively decided that she wanted to help free him and anyone else down there that could be helped. Not the brightest light-bulb, if she couldn't immediately realize there would be no safe way back down for her once she left. He wasn't sure how to take the hopeful declaration that there was always a way. Oh, how naive. Knowing he couldn't kill her anyway, he bitterly resigned that his future escape just became much more difficult, opting to send her on her way. When the crystal was eventually retrieved and the power shut off, his bitterness returned. The power eventually returned, and he braced for the worst. Yet, that bitterness was replaced with shock when, soon enough, another reset occurred. There was no death, this time.
The next time Sebastian and C-311 encountered one another, the expendable was in a frenzy, frantically explaining that even ESCAPE ended in a reset. He was flabbergasted at this. What the hell was going on??? What did any of that even mean? Why was this happening? However- this could be a good thing. This meant that maybe, he had time! If there were no consequences save for a reset upon death or escape for C-311, they could use that to their advantage! The expendable was quick to jump on-board, offering to help Sebastian any way he could in his plans to escape. From there, their alliance began, going on strong even if there were ups and downs to the situation at hand. A lot of experimentation had to be done as to what they could get away with before C-311 would die, or how far she could go post-escape before resetting. Though, as time went on, the two grew from mere allies to friends.'
Sebastian is intrigued about this little weirdo. Its a miracle to him that he hasn't been nabbed for experimentation by Urbanshade. Her antlers seem to phase through walls and ceilings, as though they aren't a tangible object. Yet, they're obviously solid to the touch. She can 'glitch' on and through various surfaces (her words), but only at certain corners and wall setups- and depending on the 'glitch' she ends up briefly stunned in some capacity. Even stranger, she can 'equip' and 'unequip' items as if its a game, and if done fast enough and facing a thin wall makes her clip right through. And, back home, people could apparently 'reset' and 'respawn', rendering death mostly useless. He's glad she's smart enough not to demonstrate anything outside of SCRAMBLER range, knowing that they'd probably be taken for experimentation if caught on CCTV. She can make computer noises and other strange SFX, but it seems he (and one other person are)/is the only one(s) who can notice it (and can somehow understand her?)
Oddities and quirks aside, she's one of the more respectful expendables, one who is nowhere near as irritating as the rest. She actually respects his boundaries, is cooperative, and kind. Even if she's on the more sensitive side, she handles his sass and snark well, and has a silly streak that mirrors his energy. Plus, when she appears with other expendables, she actually tries to hold them back from harassing Sebastian. Of course, you can't save everyone, but he does his best and is somehow mostly unbothered any time Seb ends up killing one (Perhaps the time loop is getting to her head?). He had given up on most people, but C-311 is like a weird, endearing little light in the dark.
Z-779 { p.AI.nter } : Another individual C-311 wishes to help free. Upon discovering the documents regarding him, she was mortified at what she learned, and enraged on his behalf. Due to a lack of recollection regarding the time loop, cooperation is made extremely difficult. Sebastian would need to tell p.AI.nter of C-311's assistance every time a reset occurred, which became extremely redundant at some point. C-311 opts to just try her best to evade death from fake doors, speaker hijacking and turrets as a result. She does not encounter p.AI.nter face to face often.
Z-96 { "Good People" } : C-311 vaguely pities the workers that compose this mass of flesh, knowing they were consumed without remorse or chance to escape. However, due to the fact that many people smashed into this glob were Urbanshade employees, her sympathy is low. She is glad they choose to hide in fake rooms- such a monster is terrifying to her.
Z-367 { Pandemonium } : A monster that, understandably, fills C-311 with immense fear. Any time she encounters Z-367, she departs drained and in shambles. Having to fight off such a thing in the suffocating confines of a locker never fails to inflict extreme anxiety and paranoia.
Z-317 { Eyefestation } : A monster that somehow does not faze C-311 much. Knowing she is in another world, she is not as susceptible to any manipulation via vocal mimicking telepathy- though there are times she feels herself about to break to this. Due to the communication possible through this telepathy, he tries to soothe Z-317 with thoughts that he is not their enemy, nor does he want them harmed- but this seldom works as they are too focused on revenge for their experimentation. On the occasion that this does work, Z-317 merely watches C-311 go through the room with intrigue, though she does not look into their eyes either way. Nobody is immune to radiation!
Z-90 { Wall Dwellers } : A monster that fills C-311 with immense fear and terror. Being the paranoid type, this entity is one of her absolute worst nightmares. The mere idea of something being in the walls- watching, stalking- it fills her with dread. She tends to stay glued to Sebastian any time she reaches him due to this, needing long breathers to cope with its mere existence in the facility dragging her down. In the presence of other expendables, she copes much, MUCH better. Loneliness is her kryptonite, mentally- but the paranoia Z-90 inflicts makes her less susceptible to attacks due to her constantly watching her back.
Z-V06 { Void Mass } : A monster that fills C-311 with unease. The idea of being trapped in a locker with those things, digested alive, is horrifying. She's cautious around lockers due to them, especially when alone- so she is mostly safe on that front.
Z-283 { The Angler } : A monster that inflicts anxiety. However, due to its lack of sight, evasion is easy enough. She is careful to avoid straying too far from lockers.
[ Froger ] : Same as the default Angler- but with an added nervousness at her rebounds. C-311 stays glued to lockers until her 3rd round, always.
[ Chainsmoker ] : Same as default Angler- but with an extreme added anxiety due to the green smoke it spews, akin to that of Paranoia's Box. She tries to be as patient as possible with it, but its hard when the smoke triggers her fight or flight so quickly when in lockers.
[ Pinkie ] : Same as the default Angler- but with an added anxiety due to the lack of warning signs. C-311 does not like straying far from safety solely because of her. Even a moment out in the open could mean death from her.
[ Blitz ] : Same as the default Angler- but with an added anxiety due to just how fast the damn thing is.
S-Q { Squiddles } : For some reason, C-311 finds all instances of S-Q cute. Yes, even when agitated (most of the time.) Of course she's going to startle and jump if she's caught off guard by one, but something about them is just so... silly, to her.
Vultus Limunaria { Searchlights } : She dreads any encounter with the Searchlights, especially following the Ridge. C-311 isn't the best swimmer, so you could guess why- as you'd need quick reflexes to hide if its lights approached. She has been hooked by it once- and it was one of the most painful experiences she'd had down there (if you exclude any deaths from Z-367, Z-90 or the Z-V06.)
Z-538 { Abstract Art } : It freaked her out initially, but upon learning they were completely harmless, she now merely vibes with them.
Z-432 { Limited-Time Imaginary Friend } : As nice as having a friend would be down there, that is just NOT it. Her disconnected and random statements trigger her paranoia, even if the words have nothing to do with her environment. No matter how gentle or soothing a voice may be, being told something's coming when nothing is is a gut wrenching experience- especially if you suffer from paranoia. One time using the remote was more than enough.
Mr. Lopee : An entity she has not encountered or noticed the presence of before. Despite his potential involvement in the grand scheme of things, she is left clueless.
Styx : An entity she has only ever encountered once. Upon opening the door and being jumpscared by it, she not only screamed so loud that a nearby Z-V06 was practically startled from its locker, but she stumbled backwards, tripped, and fell through a massive hole in the room, down a connected cavern and to her death. One of his more embarrassing deaths. (And as much as Sebastian could or would want to mock them for said death, he probably would have met the same fate had he encountered the damn thing so close to en environmental hazard)
J-123-4 { The Man from the Mindscape } : An entity C-311 has never encountered before.
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charmac · 4 months
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omg your tags on that headcanon post resonate so much with me. i love reading fsnficiton but it is very obviously whether someone is writing about the source material or playing dolls (which is an analogy i ALSO use look at us. look at us.) and while. full respect to playing dolls that shit ruled as kids still rules now probably like have fun and be yourself godspeed but it is always weirdly dissonant for those two things to coexist without clear distinction from each other. all this to say i AGREE
"it is always weirdly dissonant for those two things to coexist without clear distinction from each other," is exactly the point here for real.
There's nothing bad about taking characters and doing whatever you want with them and having fun, because you can make some really great and creative things that way. It's when people fail to be able to recognise that what they're doing is completely removed from canon that it gets frustrating, especially for anything still actively being made..
Because new canon content is 9/10 times gonna build off previous canon, and there are a lot of fandoms nowadays that exist heavily in the level 3 and beyond space of headcanons that continually act like new, official content not being fanon-compliant is disappointing or problematic, and that people who like the canon content and want to discuss it are somehow the ones that don't belong in the fandom.
Honestly at this point it's often hard to tell if people who complain endlessly about the canon of the thing they're a fan of is due to an actual inability to recognise when popular headcanons are a 3 or 4 or if there's a genuine chunk of people in fandoms who legit dislike their source material and got into the material and/or a character exclusively due to fanon creations and ideas
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cwarscars-a · 1 year
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i think one really important thing i wanna note w/ my portrayal of heid is that i never want to 'woodbify' him. i do not want people to feel sorry for him.
i write him as having had hardships. he's lost loved ones brutally, he's been the victim of torture and war ( as much as he brings it about others ) but he is entirely in control of his own destiny, decisions, opinions, beliefs and attitude.
he's been through tragedy and awfulness / horror, yes.
but it's his decision to respond with anger, hate, vicsciouness etc.
i dont want people to ever think that i'm making him 'soft' or 'gentle' or 'tragic'. he's not really to be sympathised with. obviously, your muse can & like, anyone can sympathise with a character, that's fine. but i don't want people to ever think im attempting to justify his behaviour / actions.
i see it less as a justification and more of an explanation / exploration. this is WHY he's the way he is, but it isn't necessarily right. nor is right for him to be this way.
you can go through tragedy and come out a better person. heid didn't. he came out a worse person. that was his choice. he's a bad dude.
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cold-neon-ocean · 7 months
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griseldabanks · 10 months
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How about 38 for Sam and Bucky?
Let Me Count the Ways ask game
Prompt: "Stay with me for a while."
Note: I already filled this prompt for Kara and Alice, so I decided this would just be another scene tacked onto the last thing I wrote involving Sam and Bucky.
BOOM.
Rat-a-tat-tat.
Boom. BOOM.
Whizz, bang, rat-a-tat-tat-tat.
“Riley! Riley, no, look out—“
Riley turning his head. Their eyes meeting in a flash of brilliant white light. An arc of lightning, stabbing downward.
Not Riley. Steve. Steve, suspended in the air for a moment, arms outstretched, then tumbling down, down, down....
“No!”
Sam jerked upright, his own scream still echoing in his ears. Where. Where was he, which way was up, where was Steve, he was falling, Sam had to catch him, but where were his wings, he was falling—
With a thump, he crashed to the ground. But it wasn't sand or dirt or stone, it was...soft. Carpet.
He threw a hand out, and it smacked painfully against something wooden. He groped in the darkness. A bed. Blankets spilling over the side, tangled around his legs.
Oh. A dream.
A white flash lit up the whole room in an instant, followed immediately by a deafening crash that made him jump out of his skin. Heart pounding, adrenaline screaming through his veins, he raised trembling hands to press against his eyes.
It didn't help. All he saw, projected against the inside of his eyelids like a movie, was Steve. One moment walking towards him, drenched from the rain, a goat cradled in his strong arms. A blinding flash, and he was flat on the ground. Not moving. Not breathing.
With a curse, Sam surged to his feet and marched out of his room, letting the door bang against the wall. He headed into the living room, trying to ground himself in the present. He wasn't in Afghanistan. He wasn't out there in the fields with a storm howling around them. He was in an apartment in Birnin Zana, provided to them while they waited for Steve to get a clean bill of health.
Right. Because Steve wasn't dead. Sam had saved him. He was alive, he was fine. They'd taken him to the hospital as soon as the lightning died down, and the doctors thought he was out of danger, but wanted to keep him under observation that night. And so he and Bucky had reluctantly come to this apartment, with every assurance that they'd be the first to know if anything happened.
Another flash of lightning broke Sam's train of thought, and he flinched again as thunder rumbled so loudly he could hear the glasses in the kitchen cupboard rattling against each other. Sam paced up and down a bare stretch of floor between the living room and kitchen, trying to breathe but failing abysmally.
Because what if something had happened? What if something was happening right now, what if Steve was flatlining and the doctors were rushing to him and no one had called them yet because they were too busy and it wasn't like Sam would be able to do anything just like always and yet again his brother would die and he would be helpless and alone and—
“Sam?”
The lights turned on in a sudden blaze that made Sam jump...but they remained on, a steady amber glow so different from the lightning. In the doorway to the other bedroom, hand still touching the light switch, stood Bucky. He'd changed out of his Wakandan robes and into sweatpants and a T-shirt. His missing arm looked weirder that way.
Another crash of thunder. Sam's nerves were too frazzled to even attempt to hide the flinch.
Bucky just looked at him, expression not changing. Then he walked over to the coffee table, pulled off his bracelet of kimoyo beads, and tapped one of them. A holographic image appeared in the air over the table, of what looked like a cardiograph. A red line moved smoothly through the center of the image, spiking up at regular intervals every second or so. A heartbeat at rest.
“Is that...?”
“Real time,” Bucky said, understanding Sam's breathless question. He sat down on the couch, gazing at the heart monitor. “He's asleep.”
Sam found himself sinking down onto the other end of the couch, swiping a hand down his sweaty face. He focused on trying to draw a deep breath without gasping. It was easier now he could watch Steve's heartbeat.
They sat in silence for a few minutes, watching those steady spikes. Sam timed his breaths in and out to those beats, until three beats passed before each inhale and exhale. His own heart rate was still faster than Steve's, but it wasn't galloping along like it had before.
Glancing over, Sam noticed that Bucky seemed to be doing the same thing. Focused on the same rhythm, they were breathing in tandem. Looked like Steve was still keeping them all in sync, even asleep and out of sight.
Then he looked at Bucky a little closer and noticed the exhausted furrows in Bucky's brow, the way his eyelids drooped. “You slept at all?” he muttered.
Bucky shook his head, not taking his eyes from the heart monitor.
“You should,” Sam said automatically. Old habits died hard.
“Tried,” Bucky said. “Just ended up watching this instead. Kind of like it used to be...back when he'd get sick all the time. I'd sit by his bed and just watch him breathe. It was like...if I closed my eyes, he might slip away. So I stayed awake.”
Sam nodded. It was usually hard to imagine Steve had ever been skinny and weak like in the old pictures...but on a night like this, when he couldn't stop thinking about Steve lying spread-eagled on the ground, not breathing....
Another crack of thunder. Sam flinched, but made himself take a deep breath and keep watching Steve's heartbeat.
“Is that because of what happened today?”
Sam looked over and found Bucky watching him. There was no judgment in his expression, only understanding. Of all people, Bucky knew exactly what it was like to deal with panic attacks and bad nightmares.
Then Sam realized he'd never told Bucky about Riley. He'd told Steve early on, but they didn't talk about it much; the subject was too painful. And even after Bucky had become a part of Sam's life, there were few occasions where the two of them were alone and in need of filling the silence. Once he'd discovered the difficulty Sam had with thunderstorms, Steve usually made an effort to distract Sam on nights like this.
But now Steve was in the hospital, asleep and out of reach. And the only one here was Bucky.
With a heavy sigh, Sam slumped back against the couch cushions. “I wasn't the only one chosen for the Falcon Program,” he finally said. If Bucky was confused at this apparent change of subject, he didn't say anything. “Riley was with me from the beginning, and he was the only other one who didn't drop out for one reason or another during training. We just...clicked, you know? Did everything together, even when we were off duty. He was like...like....” He tried to say it, but the words jumbled together in his throat, and he couldn't even swallow. Usually, it wasn't this hard. It had been years. But tonight...it was like he'd had to say goodbye only yesterday.
“Like a brother?” Bucky's voice filled the silence ringing in Sam's ears, and somehow he could breathe again.
Nodding, Sam closed his eyes to shut out the flashes of light behind the curtains at the window. He tried to remember Riley's smile, his laugh. It was probably just because of the late hour and his lack of sleep, but all he could see in his mind's eye was Bucky beaming as he ran over to greet them. All he could hear was Steve's belly laugh as they played with the kids in the village.
“What happened?” Bucky asked quietly.
Clearing his throat, Sam opened his eyes and stared fixedly at the heart monitor. “They sent us to Afghanistan. We did some good work there. Made a great team. Just Riley and me, saving lives. Saving each other. All we'd ever wanted to do. And then it was over.” The pain in his chest wasn't as insistent as it had been in the early days, but it still dug down just as deep. He thought he'd rather have one of the Dora Milaje stab him with one of their spears.
“It was a night mission. Nothing special. Just...he went left when he shoulda gone right. And then he was gone. And I couldn't....” His throat closed again, and he had to bite his lip to keep it from trembling.
“I'm sorry,” Bucky whispered.
He didn't say anything else. There was nothing else to say, really. But Sam appreciated it more than he could express.
The silence between them was easy as they sat there, not looking at each other. The thunder moved on. The lightning died down. The catch in Sam's chest steadily eased, until he could breathe deeply again, and his heart rate was almost as slow as Steve's.
Sam yawned so wide he could feel his jaw crack. After all the excitement of the day before, and then the sickening rush of adrenaline from the panic attack, he felt completely spent. Everything ached, crying out for the bed in the next room...but would he sleep? Or would he just lie there, staring into the darkness and trying not to think about the dream?
“Guess we should go back to bed,” Bucky mumbled, pushing himself to his feet. “Steve will bite our heads off if we pull an all-nighter.”
“Wait!” The word fell from Sam's lips before he realized he'd opened his mouth, and his cheeks grew warm as Bucky turned around in surprise. Sam looked away and mumbled, “Stay with me for a while.”
For a moment, he thought Bucky was going to laugh at him. But all he did was sit back down—not where he'd been sitting before, but right next to Sam, so close their legs jostled against each other.
Bucky's right shoulder pressed against his left—solid, warm, real. Not like the nightmares. Not like the memories. He wouldn't fade away as soon as Sam reached for him.
Right now, that was all he cared about.
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Dude I just wrote 1,500 words for a single story in a single sitting that never happens.
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sayakxmi · 1 year
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Homestuck | Aranea Serket
Your name is Aranea Serket, and you…
You are dead.
But before you were dead, you loved reading. You loved stories of adventures and heroes, who came from the unlikeliest of places and saved the day through their wits and skills. You loved stories of traveling the world on a ship. Of living above the law, while upholding your own sense of justice.
Your name is Aranea Serket, and you used to dream about becoming a hero and a pirate when you grow up.
You cannot do any of this anymore. You are dead.
Your name is Aranea Serket, and you could have been all these things. You have learnt of a world where you have, but this you isn't the same you that you are now.
You cannot change that. You are dead.
Your name is Aranea Serket, and you are the definition of a chatterbox. You love knowing and you love sharing the knowledge, but no one likes to listen.
Your name is Aranea Serket, and not even your own descendant wants to listen to you.
Your name is Aranea Serket, and you are annoying. Your best friend sees you as an overly-talkative windbag, and ditches you when a different, cooler cobaltblood appears in front of her. Your ex-matesprit, too, found you too much to handle and left you. All of your other friends avoid you like a plague.
Your name is Aranea Serket, and you are a dead, forgotten, scorned girl from a planet no one cares about anymore. There's no one to miss you, while you miss everyone.
Your name is Aranea Serket, and no one cried for you when you first died. They threw your body into the cocoon and said nothing when you came back.
Your name is Aranea Serket, and there was once a you that was cared and loved, and cried for when you died, but this isn't the you that you are now.
Your name is Aranea Serket, and you could have been everything.
Your name is Aranea Serket, and you are nothing.
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lexpressobean · 2 years
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I've been thinking about my current Aburame OCs and their designs and also the new ones I'm designing right now for my little project I'm working on and then I ended up writing more Kikaichu HCs while I was at it?? Feel free to take a look. The Kikai Brainrot is back baby~
Early Aburame Clan members, when numbers of "Infested" were much lower and the clan much less known for this particular aspect, would often trick their enemies and targets alike by Playing Dead, their kikaichu playing their parts as Scavenging Insects. At this time, the Aburame's clan specialty was Ambush, not Search and Destroy. The main goal at this time was to learn how to keep a relatively small kikaichu swarm under an Aburame's control while also keeping them properly sustained. At this time, Kikaichu still did not dig so heavily into their Aburame Hosts either. But they did mostly stay on their person, which prompted the use of layers and coats sooner in the clan's special history than not.
When one thinks of parasites, one might think of weight loss (as well as allergic reactions and infections). Weight loss was a very common issue amongst Infested Aburame, because of this, Infested Aburame have always been encouraged to keep on a certain amount of fat compared to a non-infested Shinobi in general. This not only keeps the eventually deeper venturing Kikaichu more seperated from the muscles of their Aburame's body in general, but the most basic holding areas to start by preadolescence (which include outter thighs, upper outter arms, especially abdomen and sometimes the buttocks) would become more comfortable to the host and more accessible to larger amounts of young kikaichu. This also gives the Infested Aburame some "reserves" to convert fat into energy, and so chakra, during more dire and lasting situations.
This is why Aburame members in Modern Day tend to be so tall and burly looking in their physiques, coats or no coats. Just as the Akimichi clan needs a consistent amount of food and calories to use their Clan Techniques, Kikaichu need a consistent amount of Chakra to be appeased and their host needs to be able to supply that. As the symbiotic relationship was fine-tuned with time, the Aburame Clan eventually put less importance in physical ability and speed while putting more emphasis on conditioning their bodies to be favorable to the Kikaichu and general stamina.
Obviously this didn't become the best trade off by modern day. The noticable lack of Taijutsu usage (beyond basic skill when necessary) was due to the fact that Close Combat in general became too risky to the already calculated and controlled innerworkings of the Infested Aburame's body. Injuries, but especially such things as lacerations or broken bones, now needed more time to heal than the average person, and ill-timed blows to the body can also result in several injured or dead kikaichu, which then results in the insects breaking down inside the body, and so uncontrolled foreign genetic material to spread. This raises the chance of infection at an alarming rate. All that, plus the perceived unfavorability of Genjutsu by the Aburame Clan (as it would appear to be a waste of chakra in general) left them to heavily rely on Ninjutsu that made use of the Kikaichu. Not only would Chakra be used up, but the Kikai sacrificed in those techniques would balance everything out. Then the left over dead insects would become a meal for the living kikaichu after battle was done.
So because of this, despite the lack of Taijutsu usage, Infested Aburame are conditioned to build up as much chakra and stamina as possible and keep their bodies as healthy and as sturdy as possible for when an eventual injury does happen.
When looking at a Naked Infested Aburame, it's also not uncommon to see a few visible, squishy bumps on the skin similar in nature to small lipomas. Especially when noted anywhere else that is not a basic holding area as listed above. Kikaichu will usually do that upon instruction by their Aburame, and I would figure the bumps would commonly develop faster usually on the back when the Aburame signals that they are planning to sit, rendering the buttocks unavailable for that time if the area is decidedly used (I think that'd be up to the host, everything else would be mandatory). Otherwise, the lack of subcutaneous fat in most areas of the body can actually make it very easy to see when the Kikaichu are moving under the skin lol ew. But fascinating. Besides careful maneuvering on the Aburame's command, several lipoma like areas (especially on an older individual) can be an indication that the Infested Aburame needs to learn better kikaichu management and communication techniques. If an Infested Aburame's body starts to look like a typically non-infested body type, the Aburame is taken aside to work on their "issues". If an Infested Aburame starts becoming slimmer, that is an urgent health situation and must be properly handled immediately.
Kikaichu do not need to be under their Aburame's skin in order to absorb chakra at their leisure. Younger Kikaichu typically fit under the skin better and may feed directly off of chakra coils, but adult sized Kikaichu will instinctually emerge from the skin and stay above it after achieving a certain size as an attempt to keep the host alive. This was a learned behaviour. Before the symbiotic relationship was nurtured, kikaichu would violently infest and quite literally suck not a host, but prey, dry of chakra, and then eat their way out for good measure. But now, Adult kikaichu will opt to hangout in the folds and layers of their Aburame's clothes and a lot of times, their scalp/hair too.
Stone Gourd carrying Aburame are always Infested and have a certain level of chakra that can feed additional Kikaichu that their body otherwise cannot physically host. But it takes years for most Infested Aburame to reach the point of actually carrying their gourd around routinely. Some few talented individuals may start within their 20s, (ie Shibi and Muta), but most will never reach the level of carryining a gourd. The some that do are typically older in age when they start. This is where their physical conditioning comes into play as well. The gourds are made of stone as to deter the kikaichu from breaking loose without proper instruction.
However, most Infested Aburame will receive and keep a stone gourd in their homes soon after they have been married to signify a Traditional Milestone. But, this also has the heavy implication that the gourd will be eventually used to keep the kikaichu safely contained while the Infested Aburame attempts to conceive a child with their new spouse.
Otherwise, within the clan, the routine use of a gourd is considered a great show of strength and skill. In Modern Times, this feat has also been recognized by other Shinobi Clans. It has also been noted in recent generations, the average age of routine gourd using individuals has been getting younger...
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armatization-a · 1 year
Text
the problem with canonically straight characters is i will, inevitably, commit Ignore Sexuality and make them bi
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I don't talk about the books I read too often because for the most part I generally either go "...alright" or find them satisfying but not as mentally itchy as things that I want to engage with transformatively (TLU being a rare exception where I think it's satisfying AND I can't shut up about it but honestly how could I possibly NOT talk about TLU) but anyway. Nevada Barr can I meet you and shake your hand for creating ex-theatre kid middle-aged unaware-bisexual park ranger Anna Pigeon specifically for me
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nereidprinc3ss · 9 months
Text
whiny and spoiled
in which reader is being a brat but spencer just can't help himself from taking off her clothes and going down on her anyway!
18+ (smut) warnings/tags: MUNCH!SPENCE (aka canon compliant!) oral fem receiving (duh lol) reader referred to as a girl, bratty reader, idk if this is soft dom spencer or if this is just pure unadulterated munch spencer who will eat pussy at the drop of a hat, overstimulation kinda, sexy and hot, will make u bust a/n: requests are tentatively open in that i may not complete them but i will surely consider them!! thank you guys for all the positive feedback, it's so motivating and i love that you seem to like my stuff so much! please lmk if you like this and what you'd like to see more of in the future! so many ideas and WIPs
You’re lounging on Spencer’s bed when he gets home, fiddling with one of his Rubik’s cubes and kicking your feet in the air absent-mindedly. 
You look up as he opens the bedroom door and gestures for you to remove your headphones, looking a little bemused at the scene in front of him. 
“How was work?” you ask, eyes tracking him as he shrugs off his bag and comes to kiss you in greeting. 
“It was fine,” he dismisses, hands braced on the mattress as he leans over you, looking you up and down. “Why are you wearing boots in bed?” 
“Because I didn’t feel like dealing with the laces.” 
“Take them off, please. You have no idea how much bacteria and filth you’re introducing to the place I sleep.” 
“Probably no more than I do with my hands,” you shrug, shaking the Rubiks cube in his face for added emphasis. He plucks it from your hand and sets it on the bedside table. 
“I’m asking politely,” Spencer says, raising his eyebrows slightly and standing up straight, probably wondering if this is the thing you’re going to push him on tonight. You chew your lip, cocking your head as you regard him. 
“I want to keep them on. They’re my good luck charm. People leave the scary girl wearing the stompy boots alone.” 
He circles to the foot of the bed. 
“Are you saying you want to scare me away?” 
“No. But I don’t need the boots to scare you,” you tease. 
You squeal when he grabs your ankles and pulls you down the bed, beginning to unlace one of your shoes. 
“Do these actually intimidate people?” he asks absent-mindedly, focused on loosening the laces. 
“I mean... I don’t know. Maybe some people,” you splutter after a moment, slightly flustered. 
“Hm. I guess I don’t find you all that scary to begin with,” Spencer admits, tugging the first boot off and tossing it to the ground before getting to work on the second one.  
“Shut up. I’m totally scary.” 
But you’re losing your steel as he looks down at you, eyes raking over your body. There is a hungry sort of sparkle in his eyes now—one that has become familiar and sends a thrill through you. 
“Maybe to people who don’t know you very well.” 
Your eyes narrow. 
“Don’t patronize me.” 
The second boot is removed and joins the other on the floor. His hands begin running up and down the front of your legs. You shiver.  
“I’m not patronizing you, honey. I’m just being honest.” The movement of his hands ceases as he seems to consider something. “Do you want me to be scared of you?” 
You swallow, eyes darting over his face and looming frame, wishing he would keep touching you. 
“No,” you find yourself saying. “But fear is respect. Everybody likes being respected.” 
“I don’t know if I agree that fear and respect are the same,” he muses, smiling ever so slightly, “but I respect you very much.” He resumes moving his hands, higher this time, over your thighs and under your skirt. “I just can’t imagine such a sweet girl being perceived as intimidating.” 
“I am not sweet,” you mutter, distracted by the way his hands skim so lightly over your skin—flipping your skirt over your stomach.  
“Right. You’re terrifying,” he amends gently, hooking his fingers in the waistband of your tights. “Up.” You lift your hips, allowing him to tug the sheer fabric down your legs and carefully off your feet. “The pink underwear are really scary,” he teases, snapping the fabric against your hip. 
“Shut up,” you repeat breathlessly, face heating. “You’re the one that got them for me.” 
“I did, didn’t I? They look good on you.” Finally, he looks up from the pink lace to your eyes. “Can I take them off?” 
“You don’t always have to ask, you know,” you breathe. Sometimes, the answer is obvious enough. 
“I like hearing you say yes.” 
You flush, because what he really means is that he likes when you get desperate. 
“Yes, you can take them off.” 
A smile flickers over his face as he slides the underwear down and off, making sure to take his sweet time. Every brush of his thumb on your calf, every delicate pass over your ankle gives you anticipatory chills.  
“Before I’m dead?” you ask, slightly strained. He tsks, tossing them on the bed. 
“Someone should do something about that attitude of yours.” 
“My attitude is your fault.” 
“Because I like giving you what you want? Sue me.” 
“Spencer,” you grit. 
He slings your ankles over his shoulders. 
“See? You’re not scary. You’re just whiny and spoiled.” 
And before you can defend yourself, or at least make a sufficiently withering reply, he’s leaning down, licking a broad stripe between your legs that for once renders you speechless. Any comment on the tip of your tongue dies as the tip of his becomes all you can think about, melting into a content moan while you rake your fingers through his hair. He sucks lightly on your clit until you’re rolling your hips and then he releases, moving to press kisses to your inner thighs. “Are you going to be nice now?” 
“Mhm,” you promise, wanting only for him to keep pleasuring you in that mind-numbing way of his. 
“Are you just saying that?” 
Another kiss. 
“No! Mean it,” you whimper. 
“Good girl,” he says, rubbing your outer thigh.  
The next kiss is planted on your clit, before he’s taking it into his mouth again and leaving you a whiny mess. You throw your head back and your eyes flutter shut, melting into the bed and not bothering to hold back your sounds. 
“Fuck.” Your voice is small, a gasp as he begins to flick his tongue over the bud, each brush against the sensitive spot making your hips stutter. He rubs your leg soothingly but doesn’t let up—you look back down to watch as best you can through your hazy, half-lidded eyes. “I love you,” you murmur. 
He laughs against you and the vibrations only make you feel higher, whining and bucking slightly when he begins to lap at your slick entrance—kitten licks so light they’re torturous. 
Spencer obviously has a goal in mind; there’s no hesitation and the teasing is minimal. He just wants to make you feel good. And it’s working. The man eats pussy like he’s in love with it.  
His name is rolling off your tongue when he kicks into full gear, firm, fast circles around your clit that make you dizzy and hot.  
“Oh, my god—” you cut yourself off with a languid, shameless moan, rolling your head to the side but keeping your eyes glued on him. He groans in approval as your hands card through his hair, moving one hand to slide affectionately up and down your stomach as the muscles there tense and flex.  
“Fucking obscene,” he mutters, pausing for another filthy, wet kiss to your cunt. “Taste so good, angel girl.” 
“Mm... wanna cum,” you beg, rolling your hips and hoping he’ll get the message. 
“You will.” Spencer takes a long, luxurious lick as if to prove his point, pulling a desperate mewl from your parted lips. “Because you always get exactly what you want, don't you?” 
“Mhm,” you agree, eyes screwing shut, but the reply quickly devolves into a stream of little ah’s that are so sweet Spencer has trouble reconciling their sanctity with their pornographic nature. And the way you unconsciously, innocently begin to pull him closer, trying to press yourself further into his mouth—well, it’s like he said; fucking obscene.  
Sometimes Spencer likes to tease you at this point, to pull away and say sweet and dirty things that always bring forth your most adorable, embarrassed, desperate whimpers. But you taste so good, and you are whiny and spoiled, and you make such pretty noises when you’re all soft and needy like this and he can’t bear to pull away. Not when you deserve to cum. And it’s thoughts like these that are the reason you’re a spoiled princess, he muses peripherally. Because he’s fucking whipped for you. 
“That’s so good,” you exhale, “just like that, please—fuck!” 
He knows you’re going to cum, and there are many things he could do, many things he could say to fuck you over for his own enjoyment, but now he wants more than just about anything he’s ever wanted to work you apart and taste you cumming on his tongue. So he keeps running a reassuring hand over your stomach, trying to remind you to breathe as you approach your peak. 
You finish, a slow wave of ecstasy washing over you, chanting his name as your hips sporadically roll and stutter into his face, and he’s making out with your soaked, messy pussy in a way that would never lead one to believe he’s ever been shy or squeamish or hesitant in any way.  
“Spencer,” you yelp, incandescent warmth radiating in soft waves from your core and slowing your movements as your hips twitch in an attempt to escape the continual onslaught of his mouth. 
“You can take it for a minute, honey,” 
A defeated, half-pleasure half-pain whine lets him know he’s won as he continues to kiss your throbbing cunt, but soon small, weak moans are slipping unbidden past the barrier of your lips. You realize he’s going to make you cum again and there’s nothing you can do about it but tighten your hold in his hair, groan, and ride his tongue as he eats you for all that you’re worth. 
The second orgasm is softer, blurrier, and equally perfect as the first. It threatens the already tenuous hold you have on your consciousness, strand after strand snapping until you’re barely hanging on. 
“Spencer,” you repeat, slurring as you try to shut your legs. “Please, can’t, baby.” 
“You could,” he says, sitting up and closing your useless legs for you, massaging the weak muscles. “You’ve done more.” 
“Mm-mm,” you disagree, chest rising and falling as your breathing slows. “Don’t wanna.” 
“That’s okay, angel. I’m not gonna force you.” 
You sigh, obviously satisfied. “That felt really good.” 
“I bet it did,” he chuckles, finally moving to lay down next to you. Immediately you curl up to him, and he smooths your skirt back down before tracing soothing patterns on the leg you’ve slung over him. “You’re so cute.” 
“Don’t go spreading it around.” 
“Never,” he promises, mocking but in good nature. The two of you lay in comfortable silence for a few moments, as you consider his decidedly unsatisfying answer. 
“You’re not even a little scared of me?” 
He smoothes your hair away from your eyes. 
“No, honey, I’m not. But I’m sure other people find you utterly terrifying.” 
You open your eyes to regard him ruefully, before they narrow again. 
“You have a little something...” you begin, gesturing to your mouth. He snorts. 
“Oh, do I?” 
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a-hazbin-reader · 8 months
Note
love the chaotic-ness of platonic alastor and reader of your posts!! the way you write him is more canon compliant but that makes it even more GREAT. can i req platonic alastor (+maybe rosie as a trio?) with overlord!reader. they just talk shit about the Vees and stuff lmao and do it openly on his radio show. hang out at rosie’s. maybe alastor gets reader to support the hotel too and everyone’s to alastor is like THEM?? You know THEM??? alastor’s like yeah lol we blow stuff up every tuesday and broadcast it where you at
OVERLORD PODCAST OVERLORD PODCAST OVERLORD PODCAST-
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Alastor X Reader X Rosie Headcanons
❌️Romantic
✅️Platonic
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TW: Alastor and Rosie cannibalism
Description: 👆⬆️
The three of you are very busy demons who have demanding jobs so getting together doesn't happen as often as you'd like
But when you get together??? It's almost like you're all a bunch of gossiping old women instead of powerful deadly overlords
Rosie brings the snacks(bring your own if you don't want people meat), Alastor provides the venue, and you pick the topic of discussion
The first podcast was entirely an accident, Alastor forgetting he was on air when you and Rosie suddenly burst in
ALASTOR YOU ARE NOT GOING TO BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED
He gets so sucked into what you're saying that he forgets about his radio show and everything the three of you are saying is being broadcast live
But a lot of people are tuning into it??? Like everyone is so entertained by the three of you and your conversation
Once you three realize what happened then you all agree that this must become a weekly occurrence
Even the other overlords listen in on it every once in a while, finding it hilarious
Vox is absolutely livid because he's being IGNORED, why is nobody watching tv anymore???
He tries to get you and Rosie on his show instead but the two of you don't even take the offer seriously
The chemistry would be all off without Alastor's sparkling humor anyways
Which makes him throw a huge tantrum that becomes the next topic between the three of you
Y'all are just trashing this man at this point
It's his own fault for providing you three with so much ammo
But nobody is safe
It's just a fun little gossip podcast that somehow blows up and turns into this gigantic thing
But it gives you three an excuse to hang out
Whenever the conversation starts to drift towards the hotel you try to stay out of it for your own reasons
And it does always go back to the hotel, Alastor is running a business afterall
Alastor slowly starts to warm you up to the idea of his hotel, whatever your motivations are or if you believe in it
Rosie also encourages you to at least humor him and go see it
Easy for you say, he's not pressuring YOU
So you give in one day, accompanying Alastor to the hotel
Huh, Alastor wasn't joking when he said that Lucifer's daughter was his partner 🤔
You're not entirely surprised when you see the shocked looks everyone gives Alastor when they see you
WTF ALASTOR WHEN YOU SAID Y/N WAS COMING I DIDN'T THINK YOU MEANT Y/N THE OVERLORD
Who else would it have been, Vaggie???
Everyone nervously watches you and Alastor interact, it's two extremely powerful beings in one hotel
Except for Niffty, she greats you like an old friend, climbing all over you and making maniacal noises
Husk and Niffty are the only ones not surprised by your friendship, knowing that you and Alastor are good friends
They fill the others in on your relationship when they think you two aren't listening
It's almost funny hearing it come from someone else, you had nearly forgotten how you two met
"That's right..! I DID try to kill you! That's so funny!"
"Isn't it? And I do believe I nearly bit your hand clean off!"
You two are fucking deranged
You have a better understanding of why Alastor wants so much support for this hotel now
And you're a little surprised that Charlie seems to believe so genuinely in the idea of redeeming a soul
Regardless of if you're sold in the idea or not, you agree to support the hotel for Alastor
But now you're going to rope Rosie in with you too, if you're gonna go down then the three of you are going down together
But that's unlikely to happen, Alastor wouldn't lead you guys into a death trap
He's never steered you wrong before
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This was so fun to write!!
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kayjaywrites · 5 months
Text
Like Bugs in a Rug: Chapter Two
(Previous Chapter)
Summary: Azriel Shadowsinger, mysterious pretty boy extraordinaire himself, was head over heels in love with you for years. Everyone in the room could see it, except for you of course. A series of connected one-shots.
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Chapter Word Count: 7,500 Chapter Song Inspo: Obey - Bring Me The Horizon
Chapter Content Warnings: hurt/comfort, angst kinda, eventual fluff, anxiety/panic attack, vomit (nothing graphic), Rhysand being an ass, Nesta x Reader friendship, Rhysand slander lol,  AFAB Reader, Reader (You), fluff, some details about Reader's appearance but overall vague, canon plot spoilers as this is canon compliant-ish Note: So is this fluff? Debatable. But there is still plenty of Az fluff in it, you just got to work for it a little more this time. You don’t need to read the first chapter to understand what’s going on here, but they are connected!
XxXx
Your 3rd year in Velaris....
It took almost three years of employment with the Inner Circle for you to personally encounter the ‘Night Triumphant’ persona. You were not impressed. The most serious you’d seen your cousin was ‘High Lord Rhysand’, the fierce leader, but even that was limited to political business outside of Velaris. More so than not, it was just Rhys, your fun loving, sarcastic friend who so happened to wield an enormous amount of power. 
The male sitting at his work desk was not your ‘Rhys’. Hell this wasn’t even High Lord Rhysand. The Night Triumphant held eye contact with you, gaze calculated and stern. You studied the authority in his expression, his mouth drawn into a tight line. Staring him down right back, you waited for the facade to break and reveal the male you had come to know as family. You searched his face for the guy who would rather face Amarantha again than put you in such a precarious situation. The very situation that plagued you with consistent nightmares since you left Hewn City.
You did not find that male.
Your gaze flitted to Mor, her body draped in a leather armchair off to the side, hoping to find a trace of humor in her expression. She tried to look nonchalant, but there was a sharp edge to her that betrayed her own trepidation.
Nesta stood an arm’s length away from you, uncharacteristically quiet in the wake of your High Lord’s orders. She seemed as if she was waiting to see who would escalate things first. Rhysand had summoned the three of you to his office to brief everyone on an upcoming…obligation. He prefaced the meeting by saying that he knew it wasn’t an ideal assignment. He wasn’t asking if you wanted to do it, it was non negotiable. 
In two months time, you, Nesta, and Mor would be answering a summons to Hewn City. Kier had been requesting a personal audience with you for the last year. Mor and Rhysand could no longer postpone it, as you were a Night Court Courtier afterall.
Still, you did not want to believe that Rhys would ask this of you. “You’re kidding, right? This isn’t very funny, Rhysand.”
“I know you can tell that I am not joking.” His flinty tone brook no argument.
Any hope of reasoning with the Night Triumphant withered away. He summoned you to his office well aware that you wouldn’t take kindly to being sent back. Here you’d been thinking Rhysand understood your trauma best, having been held captive and used while Under the Mountain. 
It appeared that you had misjudged him.
Just as you were about to say as much, Mor spoke up for the first time since the meeting started. “Kier threatened mutiny at the last Council meeting. At first he demanded a private audience, even after I informed him of our bargain. When we still refused to send you by yourself despite his threats, he agreed on these terms. You and Nesta because you’re a team, and me because I oversee The Court of Nightmares anyway. He couldn’t argue with that logic.”
You felt like you were going to be sick. After 300 years of being nothing but a tool for your father, the idea of seeing Kier’s face again so soon had your lunch sitting heavy in your stomach. It was inevitable, he thought you were loyal to him, his spy on the inside. You had zero idea how you were going to handle a reunion with him, simply thinking about it made you short of breath.
Your nights were plagued with stress dreams about what it would be like to return to your old home. You avoided stewing on the topic during your waking hours. The inevitability of it all often sent you spiraling, you couldn’t ghost Kier forever, but you thought you had more time. There was no fucking way you were ready. “I can’t do this,” You said, “give me any other assignment, and I’ll do it. Just not this.”
“You can,” Rhysand enunciated each word, slow and deliberate, like he wasn’t sure you would understand him, “and you will.” 
Oh hell no. You did not uproot your entire life to be spoken to like that. “Do not speak to me like a child, Rhysand–”
“Then stop acting like one,” he scolded, like you were the one being unreasonable, “this is your duty to your court, what I pay you to do. If you won’t do what needs to be done to protect your court then we don’t have a place for you here.”
Rhysand’s words hit like a blow. Your sharp intake of breath was echoed by both Nesta and Mor, but you couldn’t see them, they might as well have not been there, your world shrinking down to Rhysand as he regarded you coldly.
“So what will it be?” He addressed you, leaning forward over his desk, leering, “will you do as your High Lord asks of you, or will you be resigning today?” He pressured.
Your hands fisted, ire rising up so fast it made your eyes sting with unshed tears. If you got kicked out of Velaris you’d undoubtedly end up back in Hewn City. And you couldn’t let that happen, not after you finally got a taste of freedom.
Rhysand may like to believe himself better than Kier, but how was this any different from how Kier treated you? Was this your destiny? Undeserving of kindness unless you proved your worth? 
What about you made people forget that you were a living, breathing being? Just like everyone else in the room, you had feelings that mattered, and hopes for your future. You’d been stripped of your freewill for the first three centuries of your life. It was a wonder that you hadn’t gone mad.
Were you only allowed a taste of freedom? Was that Rhysand’s plan all along? Get you hooked on life in Velaris then dangle it in front of you like you were a simple mule, your freedom the carrot held just out of reach.
It made your blood boil.
“My apologies.” You sneered at him, gone was the meek, conditioned wallflower. You meant all the disrespect. In a dramatic flourish you bowed low to Rhysand, making sure he saw your contempt for him when he met your gaze.
 You maintained direct eye contact as you hissed harsh sarcasm at him, “I am at your disposal, High Lord.”
Rhysand’s eyes flared with something dark and aggressive. Time slowed, a pulse of his power cresting over you in a suffocating wave, a preview of how oppressive he could make it if he so wished. Dread replaced your anger, the confidence you’d displayed moments ago dissipating. You struggled to not show how he had shaken you, and by some miracle, you stood your ground. Still, he could probably hear your heart pounding from where he sat.
Amidst the theatrics, your own power had not been so keen on backing down. It had coiled around you like a viper ready to strike, protective, as Rhysand’s prowling darkness prodded your boundaries. 
This version of Rhysand left you stricken, unable to reconcile the egregious behavior with the male you’d had breakfast with just that morning. It felt like his power was tearing you in half, and he wasn’t even exerting himself. He looked bored.
Did you escape the clutches of one villain, only to run into the hands of another? Were you really that foolish?
Mor stepped into your field of vision, mouthing something at you. You hadn’t realized your ears were ringing until the shrill noise faded enough for you to hear her calling your name. The frantic quality of her voice snapped you out of whatever daze Rhysand’s power had cast on you.
Right. Nesta and Mor had witnessed that entire thing. You’d forgotten about their presence in the heat of the moment, your attention tunnel visioned on Rhysand. He had humiliated you in front of some of the most important people in your life. The only thing that could have made it worse was if Azriel had been there too.
Intense embarrassment flooded you, a seed of distrust taking root deep in your heart. You felt so stupid, thinking you could trust Rhysand and his Inner Circle. Mor was still trying to get your attention, but you stared right past her, looking at Rhysand like you hated him.
Hell. Maybe you did.
Mor called your name once more with urgency, moving closer to you, half turned so she hadn’t given her back to her High Lord, but solely focused on you. “It’s the best we could do without inciting a civil war.” She tried to clarify, emphasizing on the ‘we’ as she gestured between herself and Rhysand. 
“You have to know we wouldn’t put you in this position if we had any other choice. I personally promised I would never leave you alone in that city again, and there is nothing our father can say or do to make me break that promise to you. We will do this together.”
Rhysand’s power had receded, but you could still feel it loitering like a watchdog. Something you’d never imagined Rhys doing to you before the meeting. He’d always spun such pretty promises about your future in Velaris, and you believed him.
And now Mor was doing the same exact thing. More pretty promises, but no proof of her intentions to follow through with them. 
Mor’s shoulders visibly sagged, “If you don’t believe me, then look.” She pleaded, offering her mind up for you to read.
You physically recoiled at her suggestion. “I will do no such thing!” You spat back in disgust, “You are my sister, this is supposed to be my family. I will not taint our relationship with my powers in a moment of weakness. You may not return the same respect, but I refuse to surround myself with people I can’t trust without rummaging around their mind for their truths first.”
Unlike some males went unsaid as you fumbled to tone it down for Mor. Your problem was not with her, and she didn’t deserve your harsh words. “I can’t…I won’t….I–”
Frustrated with yourself, you took a steadying breath, emotion burning behind your eyes. Despite your best effort to keep composed, your voice quivered, “I will not be like our father.”
The room was stunned silent, Mor regarded you with sadness, lips parting to respond, but then pursing closed in a tight line.
Rhysand was the one to break the silence. His power dispersed as he leaned back in his chair, acting like he hadn’t just wound you up tight enough to fracture you into pieces.
“So you accept the assignment then?” He inquired, brushing nonexistent lint from the cuff of his dress shirt.
His lack of remorse irked you. Did he not think he could have handled the situation better? Was this how he treated everyone in the Inner Circle? The list of things you wanted clarification on kept growing, so instead you settled on, “Yes.” 
“I’m glad we could come to an agreement then.” He drawled, “We will go over details and strategy another time, when we are all more composed.”
You wanted to punch him in his goddamn face.
“For now, this meeting is dismissed.”
As soon as he finished speaking you stormed out of his office, nearly colliding with Nesta in your haste to get away from Rhysand. Originally you were going to visit the library after the meeting. Nesta had suggested a book for you to read, and you wanted to read it so you had something to talk to her about. But you were too worked up to do that now, you needed to get out of there. 
You didn’t care where you ended up, so long as you put as much distance between you and Rhysand as possible.
XxXx
By step 174 your blurry vision cleared a smidge, too out of breath to cry for the moment. You didn’t have anyone to help you leave The House of Wind, so you took to the 10,000 stairs with the expectation of someone eventually coming to find you. There was no way in hell you’d actually be able to reach the bottom. You began the descent down the spiraling staircase so fast It was a marvel that you didn’t trip.
Any time you slowed down Rhysand’s words would play on loop in your head. The only way to drown it out was to pick up the pace, the exertion elevating your heart rate enough for it to overpower that nasty voice in the back of your head. If you ran fast enough the only thing you could concentrate on was counting the steps you took.
239 steps down, and you had no choice but to slow down to a more reasonable pace. It was a warm day, and you were getting dizzy. The last thing you wanted to do was pass out. In a desperate attempt to keep your mind occupied as you caught your breath you focused on the breeze cooling the sweat beading up on your forehead. You listened to the slap of your bare feet on the smooth, sun-warmed stone. You thought of the color of the sandals you left behind at the very top of the stairs. You pondered on which step you’d discarded your blouse on after it began to cling to your sweaty skin.
Your guess was step 148.
You hit the first landing platform at step 250, slowing to a walk as you panted, hands propped against your hips as you counted your next few steps. Woozy, you let your eyes fall closed for a moment, but the image of Kier sitting in his throne room beckoning you forward flashed across your mind. You flinched so hard you accidentally opened your eyes looking directly into the sun.
It felt like your head had a heartbeat of its own, vision blotching from the brightness. You didn’t know how your day could get any more bleak as you rapidly blinked the disorienting dots away. Glimpses of The Court of Nightmares throne room lurking behind every blink, Kier looked more like Rhysand each time you closed your eyes.
It made your stomach lurch, and you whimpered around a dry heave.
A particularly strong gust of wind ruffled through your hair, and you can almost hear Azriel’s voice reminding you to focus on your other senses. Your mind can lie to you, but it’s much harder for all your senses to be tricked at the same time.
The sunlight, the ever-present wind, the sound of birds, the smell of fresh air. Let nature ground you. 
It just wasn’t enough. You’d only paused for a few moments, but your chest began to feel too tight for your lungs, anxiety squeezing the air out of you before you could properly inhale it. Two months. Just two measly months to figure out what the hell you were going to say to Kier–to your mom, after you’d gone no contact for almost 3 years. Two months to not be petrified of somehow getting trapped down there again.
So you continued down the stairs, pushing yourself harder. 
251. 252. 253. Counting them like Azriel had taught you.
It had been after your first dinner with the Inner Circle at the House of Wind. Mor was a little too tipsy to winnow home safely, so the both of you decided it best to share a guest room. You were feeling antsy, Mor having fallen asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.
The House of Wind was so different from Hewn City. Cozy and surprisingly casual in decor, but it was carved out of the side of a mountain. With the curtains drawn, in the dark quiet of the night, it almost felt like your bedroom in The Court of Nightmares.
You had thought a glass of water would do you some good, help you settle enough to get some rest. So you set out for the kitchen, taking care to walk quietly so as to not wake anyone. The hallway led to a flight of stairs, which brought you to more hallways that seemed to stretch on, and on, and on. The homey decor fell away, your balance wobbling with the sudden onset of vertigo. Closing your eyes didn’t help, dizzy and disoriented, everything felt like it was tipped on its axis. You couldn’t place where you were, where you were going, just that you were alone. Fear flooded your senses, and you swore you smelled the dank air of the streets of Hewn City like you were still there.
Azriel found you slumped against the wall on shaky legs, your pulse pounding so hard in your ears you couldn’t hear what he was saying to you. The touch of his rough hands on your bare arms was soothing enough to bring you back to yourself. You weren’t walking the streets of Hewn City. You weren’t alone. Azriel had you.
Each inhale had still felt like you were gulping in freezing cold water, your breath coming in irregular gasps. You thought you were going to die in that hallway, suffocating on fucking air.
Azriel took you to the training grounds on the rooftop of all places. You can still remember the brightness of the full moon that night as he coached you through breathing exercises. Then, coaxed you into walking laps with him around the perimeter of the huge training grounds. He counted each step aloud with you until you had calmed enough to tell him what the hell had happened.
And that was how you and the Shadowsinger bonded over Claustrophobia. An unfortunate thing to have in common, an even more unfortunate first thing to find you had in common.
In the moments after you’d come down from your panic attack you wanted to svirel up and fade away, so thoroughly embarrassed. But now, you thanked The Mother for sending Azriel to find you that night.
It was those same coping skills that led you to working out your anxiety after the meeting. 290 steps away from The House of Wind, and you were sure your legs were going to give out if you kept pushing yourself. You came to a slow stop, soles of both your feet planted on the same stair. Lulling your head back so your face was to the cloudless sky, you closed your eyes and pictured that moment with Azriel. Instead of Kier morphing into Rhysand, you saw Azriel walking laps with you around the moonlit training grounds.
You basked in the breeze against your face, your anger and fear still roiling in your stomach, but no longer all consuming. The relief was short lived, a concentrated pang of despair reared its ugly head, raw hurt so overwhelming it chased the warm memories with Azriel away. It made you so tired, so emotionally drained you felt it in the marrow of your bones. You wanted to just let go, collapse in a heap and never get up again.
Yet, by some stroke of willpower, you remained on your feet. You hadn’t warmed up before taking on the stairs, and you could already feel soreness settling into your muscles. Gingerly you sat yourself down on the steps, resting your elbows on your thighs as you rubbed your hands over your face, spreading fresh tears across the top of your cheeks.
If you won’t do what needs to be done to protect your court then we don’t have a place for you here. Rhysand’s words burned the part of you that had always suspected as much. There was this nasty little voice that lived in the back of your head. It would mock you when you were too content in calling this place home.
You wondered if that voice would start to sound like Rhysand.
The thought broke your heart a little bit more. You wanted so badly to make him proud, to earn your place in the Inner Circle, prove that they hadn’t made a mistake taking you in. The worst part was that you thought you were doing good. Not that you’d believed yourself to be one of them, you were still so new, but you thought…you thought…
You don’t know what you fucking thought.
Curling into yourself, your knees tucked in close to your chest, you made yourself as small as possible. The full body trembling made your sobs shaky, your entire being wobbled from the weight of your failure, your naivety. This was what you got for wanting to do it the right way. You’d never built relationships without relying on your powers to sniff out their loyalty beforehand, never truly trusted on your own violation.
Your father always thought it was a stupid risk to take when you could know for sure. You thought it was an awfully lonely way to live, to never trust fully. Perhaps you’d been wrong.
This was what you get, you silly girl. Kier’s voice taunted from the back of your mind. Or was that Rhysand’s voice? Did the difference even matter anymore? 
The telltale sound of approaching footsteps closed in on you from behind, you couldn’t tell who it was, all you could smell was the salt of your own tears. Maybe it was one of them coming to take you out of your misery, maybe Rhysand took your display in his office as a sign of disloyalty.
The killing blow never came, so you glanced up to see Nesta taking a seat next to you. The last person you expected to come looking for you if you were being honest.
She didn’t look at you right away, which you appreciated. You were humiliated enough without her seeing you wiping your own snot on your forearm. Her icy stare was focused on the view, the only indication that she had run to catch up with you, a few fly away hairs having been jostled loose from her braids.
“You were pretty hard to catch up to, you know,” She leaned back, supporting her weight on her hands against the step behind her, “for someone who doesn’t regularly train, at least.”
Her attempt at humor, which earlier in the day would have made you indignant, fell flat. Instead inciting a new wave of tears to fall past your lash line. You dropped your head lower to hide it from her, but it did little to smother the sound of your quivering breath.
She didn’t try again, and her presence grew awkward when you didn’t try either, but she stayed next to you regardless.
When it became apparent that she would stay by your side unless you sent her away, you found your words. “What if I can’t do it,” You croaked out, voice absolutely wrecked, “Face my father, return underground? What if I can’t do what’s expected of me? What if it’s too much, too soon? What if I lose everything because I’m not strong enough.” Will never be strong enough.
“Then we will figure it out,” Nesta answered without hesitation, “Together.”
You are alone. That damned voice insisted.
“But Rhysand said–”
“I know what Rhysand said.” Nesta hissed, and you startled, your bloodshot eyes meeting hers for the first time since she arrived. She looked pissed, lips pursed in a scowl as if the High Lord was right in front of her. “Rhysand is an insensitive jackass. He won’t send you away because you messed up one job.”
“How can you know that?” You whispered, already knowing that she couldn’t know for sure. 
“Because I’ve pissed him off by doing far worse, and I’m still here.”
You shook your head at her reasoning, not good enough, she can’t know for sure. “You're his mate’s sister, and Cassian’s mate. He can’t exile you.”
“And you're The Morrigan’s sister, and his own cousin.” Nesta deadpanned. “You’re not going to get exiled over a visit to The Court of Nightmares.”
“How can you possibly know that?!” You shouted, one of your hands clutching the fabric of your sweat soaked chest binding as your heart ached. Frantic to believe her, but knowing that you just couldn’t.
“Because Rhysand hates me, we barely tolerate each other on good days. He once threatened to banish me to the human continent,” she rebuked, hands flying about as she grew impassioned, “He loves you. He’s just an overpowered ass on a power trip. You questioned his authority and it hurt his fragile little ego. And even if he was stupid enough to try to cast you out, the rest of the Inner Circle would never let that happen.”
Your nerves were fucking shot. Whatever remained of your bravado frayed with every hagrid breath, it was impossible to stay focused. It was like your powers were waiting for you to be distracted, taking the opportunity to thrash against your mental shields. You didn’t know if it was skill keeping your powers in check, or dumb luck.
Your headache spread across your temples, sharp pain panging behind your eyes. You were already so tired, but the tears would not stop coming. That damned voice, still whispering its poison, adding to the agony. Nesta can’t know for sure, but you could if you just gave in.
You looked Nesta over, her relaxed body language at odds with the determined fire in her eyes. She left herself wide open, she wouldn’t even know if you read her. You’d be in control, your fate wouldn’t be left up to a gamble.
Nesta tried to meet your gaze, and you squeezed your eyes shut, turning away from her. It was impossible for you to think with her piercing stare studying you. What reason did Nesta even have to care about what happened to you? She didn’t say shit while Rhysand was ripping your world apart, and yet she showed up here? To do what exactly?
There was a dull ringing in your ears as your power surged against your restraint, and maybe you screamed, maybe you didn’t. Your fingers went up into your hair, fisting at your roots as you pulled, rocking yourself back and forth because it would be so easy.
And maybe if you gave in, that stupid voice would stop.
Nesta called your name, “I wouldn’t let Rhysand kick you out of Velaris.”
The cry you let out sounded almost feral. “I don’t know that!” .
“No, you don’t,” Nesta acquiesced, “but do you trust me?”
Did you trust Nesta? The question cut you into you like the edge of a knife, your heart answering with a resounding yes.
Wow, did you want that to be true. But that sinister voice oozed like an oil slick in the back of your head. Will you do as your High Lord asks of you, or will you be resigning today? You had trusted Rhysand too.
Even if Nesta wanted you here, did you think she would disobey her High Lord for you? You didn’t know, not for sure. Your power reared up again, and your head pounded at the onslaught. That oily voice so loud it was all you could hear. You could know.
“I-I don’t know.” You stammered, stomach churning into grotesque knots.
“Do you trust yourself?” Nesta continued her line of questioning.
That answer came to you quick, no, and it had you lurching forward, your balance lost as you scraped your knees sliding down a couple stairs. You wretched, violent heaves as your stomach emptied out on the stairs in front of you.
No. You didn’t trust yourself.
“There was a time where I didn’t trust myself either.” It was like you weren’t barfing up your guts right in front of her, Nesta spoke with such calm. “Didn’t let anyone close enough to trust, even myself, I didn’t know how.”
You wretched again, your hair getting in the way. Gentle fingers gathered the stray pieces that had fallen from your updo. You hadn’t heard her move over to you, but she was there, steadying you as you struggled through a bout of dry heaving. If you weren’t so miserable, the tenderness coming from Nesta would have shocked the hell out of you.
Her free hand rubbed soothing circles into your back as she continued her tale. “I hated myself,” Nesta confided, voice raspy with emotion, “so much that I drank myself stupid every night to escape the darkness of my own thoughts.”
Now, the random heart to heart did shock you.
Three years of trying to connect with the enigma that was Nesta Archeon. Three years of getting redirected when you asked something too deep. The most you got out of Nesta was what she liked to read, so you picked up reading just to have a reason to approach her outside of assignments. Three years of one sided heart to hearts, evaded personal questions, and turned down sleepover invitations.
And she decided that now was the proper time to trauma dump on you? While you were half dressed, ugly crying with vomit in your hair?
What a baffling female. The confusion helped you relax, so surprised you were by Nesta’s sudden urge to share. Her hand kept a slow, steady rhythm as she continued to rub gentle circles onto your back, you hadn’t realized how tensed you’d been until muscles you didn’t even know you had started going lax. 
Whatever Nesta was doing, it was working. So you basked in the comfort her touch provided and listened.
“Someone taught me how to acknowledge those thoughts and let them go. To breathe, and still everything else in my mind, and let my mind think those things, but to not dwell, because that dark self loathing didn’t define me.”
The dark self loathing didn’t define you. Her words chipped at something that had been left festering for far too long. Had that been it all along, that terrible voice in the back of your head, had it been self loathing?
“Give yourself permission to feel, acknowledge it, and let it go.”
And it was so liberating, giving a name to what had been festering under your skin. Hate. Disgust. Cowardice. You cried, but not the agonized, tortured type of wails that had crippled you moments ago. This was a release, the type of ugly cry you do when something you didn’t know was broken starts to heal.
You hated yourself. And that was okay, because as you waited for that awful voice to mock you, it never did. You hated yourself, wept so hard you thought your eyes were going to fall out of your skull, but you had never felt lighter.
Nesta found your hand, gentle at first as if giving you time to pull away. Then she held onto you like the simple touch could convey what you were worth to her. “You are the rock against which the surf crashes. Nothing can break you.” She whispered, but the words resonated like she had shouted them at you.
The smile started as a small twitch at the corners of your mouth, but you knew Nesta saw it all the same. You searched for that dreadful voice, waited for it to speak something dreadful, but the quip never came. The smile that bloomed on your cheeks was wide with astonish.
You couldn’t believe it, after 300+ years of letting that nasty voice ruin you, there was peace. In its place was something new and bright.
Hope.
XxXx
The sound of beating wings announced the arrival of Cassian and Azriel a moment before the weight of their landing sent vibrations through the hard stone of the staircase. The two hulking Illyrian warriors made quick work of the walk up the stairs, their casual conversation trailing off once they were within earshot of you and Nesta.
“Ness!” Cassian’s voice boomed in greeting, cheery and boisterous, “I see why you asked for me to bring Azriel now. Here I thought you were acting on your ‘secret’ fantasies finally. The location left something to be desired, but I wasn’t going to be picky.”
Nesta sat shoulder to shoulder with you, so close, you felt her stiffen at Cassian’s offbeat comment. If you weren’t so drained, you’d be cross with her for summoning more witnesses, but the idea of having to walk back up all those steps upset you far more. The adrenaline high from your anxiety had long worn off, and without its numbing effect, you weren’t sure if you could even stand without your legs wobbling.
Nesta sighed, deep and long suffering, but affectionate nonetheless. “Your inability to read the room will always astound me.”
“Good thing we’re outside, there is no–” Cassian’s breath hitched, now close enough to get a good look at your downcast expression, haggard appearance, and odd attire. You were careful to keep your emotions under control, unwilling to let anyone in the Inner Circle see you in such a vulnerable state. Years of cautious composer, wasted, all because of a meeting that lasted less than 30 minutes. You expected disapproval, your emotions had only been met with ridicule in the past, but the apparent emotions flying across Cassian’s face were anything but cold.
Worry. Guilt. Unease. Cassian’s emotions were so boldly displayed, you didn’t need your powers to disconcert them.
Cassian paused in his ascent as he looked you over for injury, but Azriel closed the distance in the time it took you to blind away the tingle of the latest round of tears. Their concern was almost palatable, and being shown that type of care felt too good to be real. 
These males had no reason to care so much, Nesta had no tangible reason to care so much. You were so… you, so replaceable and plain. You breathed through the thought, let it roll over you, maybe that was why they cared so much, because you are you. It had never occurred to you that you were someone worth caring for. Not when your own father never cared. Certainly not after Rhysand gave you the ultimatum to get useful or get out.
You are the rock against which the surf crashes. Nothing can break you. Nesta’s words repeated in your head, sending a zing of determination down your spine. 
“What happened? Are you hurt?” Azriel crouched down, his chest siphon reflecting the late afternoon sun. His questions made you feel queasy, but his presence soothed over you like a balm. This male simultaneously was the person you worried about disappointing most, and the person you felt most safe being vulnerable around.
Unlike with Nesta, you didn’t struggle with facing Azriel. He was inspecting the grime covered scrapes on your bare toes. “Where are your shoes?” He asked you, puzzled as he then took note of your sweat soaked bra, “and your shirt?”
A dark look passed over him, if his shadows could withstand the direct sunlight, you were sure they’d be writhing around you. He spoke your name like a whispered prayer, desperate. His gloved hands hesitated as he reached out to cup your face, only smoothing his thumbs over your cheeks when you didn’t jerk away, “please look at me,” and you did, meeting his amber eyes as he wiped remnant tear stains from your cheeks, “Did someone try to hurt you?”
You knew what he meant, but your explanation caught in your throat. A brief moment of shame overwhelmed you, because here you were blubbering over some harsh words from your High Lord, when people suffered far worse fates than your own every day. Azriel began to tense, an icy cold rage taking form as he mistook your silence as an affirmative.
You shook your head ‘no’, hating the troubling turmoil you had unintentionally sowed in him. His shoulders sagged, the sign of his relief so slight, many would have missed it. It was all it took for the remaining threads of your thin composure to snap.
Azriel all but scooped you into his arms as tears blurred your vision, and you crumbled into him, no further prompting needed. He held you so tight, it was like he was trying to hold all your pieces together for you. His wings flared to keep his balance, and maybe later you’d feel sheepish about almost tipping him backwards down those unforgiving stairs, but you relished in the comfort his strength brought you.
“I-I was–It was–” You couldn’t string the sentence together, “We were…I was–” you tried again but your breathing was off, your thoughts all jumbled, and Blessed Mother, you couldn’t do it again. Any words you’d thought about trying to say morphed into sobs, barely audible, but you couldn’t hide the way your body shook with them.
“Rhysand happened.” Nesta asserted, sparing what was left of your dignity by cutting off your senseless stuttering. She summarized the meeting, but touched on the major points that had triggered your anxiety. She was gentle with the recollection of your part in the meeting, scathingly critical of Rhysand. 
“When I left Rhysand’s office, The Morrigan was getting in his face, and as much as I would have loved to see how that went down, it felt wrong to not check in with you.” Nesta explained like she was coming clean, “ I asked the house where you were.”
It was about as close to an apology you’d ever get from Nesta. You knew from experience that Nesta took her time warming to people, preferring to mind her business and stay out of Inner Circle drama. Once she’d made an offhand comment about being the center of the drama enough to last her the rest of her fae lifetime.
Keeping your head rested on Azriel’s shoulder, you turned your face to the side so your voice was less muffled, “Thank you,” your words carried on the wind, paper thin, frail, but so heartfelt, “for following me.”
Nesta didn’t respond, and you didn’t dare look at her out of fear of getting weepy again. But you felt it all the same, a shift in the relationship between the two of you. Like a bridge branching out, a new understanding solidified in place, and you knew Nesta had felt it too.
You shifted in Azriel’s arms, intending on testing your strength, but his arms tensed to keep you in place. In one graceful movement that had your head spinning, Azriel stood up right, adjusting to support your weight in a bridal hold.
“How about we get you home and clean you up?” Azriel suggested, loud enough for the others to hear, but the question aimed at you.
Home. As in the apartment you shared with Mor. He had called Velaris your home.
Your heart gave a painful throb, all choked up again at the sentiment. Going home sounded like the most splendid thing in the whole world in that moment. You didn’t want to think about Rhysand or Hewn City anymore, you wanted to go home so much it hurt.
There was some rustling, Cassian coming to stand near Nesta. “Wanna race me back up to the house?” His words were muffled as if his lips were pressed into the crown of Nesta’s head. “Winner gets head.”
The swift resounding slap Cassian received almost made things seem normal.
“Are you two good?” Nesta ignored Cassian’s taunting, and you nodded at the same time Azriel responded with, “Yes, I’ve got her.”
A beat passed in silence, all four of you waiting to see if anyone added anything else. Then rapid footsteps took off up the stairs, and you popped your head up from the crook near Azriel’s underarm to see Nesta sprinting up the stairs.
“Hey!” Cassian bellowed, charging after her, “cheaters never prosper, Nesta!”
“Prove it, you overgrown bat!”
If you weren’t about ready to pass out from exhaustion, you would have laughed at their antics. Azriel was watching them, an unguarded fondness in his hazel eyes you rarely got to see. The two of you stayed like that, Azriel watching his friends, you committing his soft expression to memory. By the time Azriel glanced down to you, Cassian had overtaken Nesta’s lead, their figures dots in the distance.
You were a melted puddle of female in his arms, all tension and stress slipping from your muscles as your eyelids drooped. Try as you might, you couldn’t keep your eyes open for another second. Paranoia nagged at you, fear of what you’d see when you finally rested your eyes.
Nothing. Blissful darkness. Peace.
“I’m going to take off now. Loop your arms around my neck and hold on tight, okay? Once we get up high enough, the rest of the flight will be smooth.”
You did as you were told, any other time you would have been a nervous wreck, but you didn’t have it in you to fret. You’d always winnowed with someone, even learning how to land the drop through the wards when Mor winnowed with you to the House of Wind. You’d thought no one had noticed how you avoided the topic, but surprise surprise, Azriel had noticed.
The thought of being up that high in the sky and dropped sure made your pulse spike. Growing up in an Underground City meant your feet were always planted on the ground. So maybe it wasn’t a stretch to claim that you weren’t a fan of heights, you’d never flown with anyone before, but it would make a lot of damn sense.
Your musing was cut short. Azriel launched straight up into the sky, powerful wings effortlessly gaining momentum and speed. You clung to him, hands clasped together around his neck in a death grip, screaming bloody murder the entire ascend. Although you would deny it if anyone asked.
Things evened out once Azriel felt he was high enough, setting a leisure pace towards what you assumed to be the direction of Mor’s apartment. Your eyes were squeezed shut, wind whipping your hair out of what was left of your updo, tossing it across your face.
You must have been quite the sight, if the amusement in Azriel’s voice was any indication. “Are you going to look at the view?”
Your hair was a disheveled mess across your face, the wind burned your already sore eyes when you tried to pry them open. “Even if I wanted to, I can’t keep my eyes open,” It was probably beautiful, but you didn’t want to push your luck, you’d had enough panic attacks for the day, “Luckily, I don’t want to.”
He chuckled. “Next time then.”
Blame it on the fatigue, but you found yourself nodding in agreement. Something you may come to regret when he urges you to fly with him instead of winnowing the next time you travel together.
But maybe it won’t be so bad, if Azriel was the one carrying you. With your eyes closed, ear pressed to his chest, his steady heartbeat lulled the residual tension and anxiety away until all you felt was the security of his arms. You could almost forget that you were hundreds of feet off the ground.
In Azriel’s care, it was easy to relax, he wouldn’t let anything bad happen. It was in that half dozing state, snuggled up as close as you could get to him, that your sleepy mind realized moments like these were the ones you wanted to remember.
Ultimately, Rhysand’s nasty words were a small part of your day. The majority of your time was spent with Nesta, bonding with her in a way you’d never managed previously. Something that would have never happened if Rhysand hadn’t been a dick.
Yeah. You’d much rather remember the day as the Nesta heart-to-heart incident. Or the first time you flew with Azriel.
Drifting into a deeper sleep, you dreamt of the way Cassian’s laughter echoed with joy as he chased after Nesta up the stairs. You dreamt of soaring through the clouds with Azriel, the same fondness you’d seen in his eyes for Cassian and Nesta, but aimed at you.
It may take you the rest of your life, but you would replace all the trauma muddying up your memories with new memories you wanted to remember. New memories filled with laughter, affection, trust, and adventure.
One day at a time. 
Rhysand could go pound sand though.
XxXx
Previous Chapter / Bonus: Chapter 2.5 / Next Chapter (coming soon)
A/N: Don't worry the next part is going to be more like the first chapter. There will be like two more chapters sprinkled in that have a more serious tone, but the rest will be fluff, drama, and tomfoolery a plenty. Stay tuned for cheeky Cassian in the next update!!
Tag List: @f4iry-bell @jediknightjana @microwaveallthedemons @olive-main
@starswholistenanddreamsanswered @5onedirection5
@brieflyclassymortal @hauntedstudentobservationus
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starry-stormy-knight · 9 months
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taken me ages but behold archive karecktors
adolin and maya beloved but also the most time consuming because i had to figure out how the hell i was going to do adolin's hair and not hate looking at it, and maya took me forever to figure out the colours lol. looked at so many references trying to figure out what dead vines should look like and what i would like it to look and i couldnt really find what i wanted lol. but what i went for was like really dried out and very very dead looking fibre. that wasnt too bad but trying to figure out her clothes that would look decent before and after she becomes a deadeye was hell for me an amateur colour theory understander lmao
i have drawn shallan before so she wasn't too difficult but i was truly torn about which version of pattern i wanted to show?? so i did a few of them hahah. i did a canon compliant version, alluding a bit to BE NOT AFRAID angel vibes. but im pretty passionate about ferrofluid-looking pattern as thats what i picture in my head (but i couldnt really find a good reference so i couldnt really do it well. it's also like, about the way it moves more than a still frame so extra challenge). and if you've seen my shallan art you know i. asdlkfjh. i originally pictured pattern as a QR code so i was compelled to continue it. @mistbjorn this one's for you because youre so right <3
syl i usually picture similar to kida in disney's atlantis when she merges with the crystal and you can see her scalp beneath her transparent hair, so thats the inspo for her. for the sylspear i designed it to look a bit like a caduceus as homage to kaladin's medical training and his dad, and like it's not that deep but i guess the swirly glowy bits are his duality and being torn between two worlds etc etc or you can just picture spren zipping about if you want lol like i definitely pictured syl was one but the other makes no sense
the kholins i dont have much to say since they were not part of my original plan hahaha but i couldn't help adding them too. i lowkey struggled to make them unique but also similar because family alksdjfhs i was sketching this around a time i did a lot of face studies so it was so whack and the colouring absolutely killed me so it is what it is asldkjaklsdjf
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gureumz · 1 year
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come to me, make it right
rating: explicit
member: heeseung
notes: fem-bodied reader, backup dancer!reader, slight dom!heeseung, canon-compliant (?), dirty talk, semi-public sex, choking, unprotected sex, creampie, fingering, cum-eating, reader breaches professionalism lol
a/n: let's give heeseung a break and let him have his (your) cake 😔 so here i present the backup dancer fic! don't lie to me i know y'all wish it was you bc i do
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"he's really something, isn't he?"
the question catches you off guard, your head turning abruptly as you give your friend a look. sion, dressed nearly identically to your all-black get-up, scoots closer to where you're seated on the floor, shoving her shoulder right up to yours.
"what are you on about?" you question before taking a big gulp from your water bottle.
"heeseung," she whispers, gesturing with her eyes to the tall figure standing across the practice room. he's typing on his phone, back turned to you.
"what about him?" you ask.
"he's good. like really good. one of the better idols i've worked with," sion explains, hooking an arm around yours.
"oh, please, you wish you could work with him personally," a different voice whispers from your right. serin, another one of your co-backup dancers, slides up to where you're sitting.
"too bad _______ got the gig first," serin adds, nudging you. you roll your eyes as the two of them collapse in giggles.
it's been two weeks since you were onboarded onto this project for enhypen's comeback. today was the dance practice filming and you can say that so far, it's been smooth sailing for the most part. the company was generous enough and the performance directors were easy to work with. the members themselves gave you no problems whatsoever, though you could only truly speak for one of them.
heeseung was nice enough, extremely polite, but also tremendously serious when it comes to performing. you've only known him for all of the two weeks, but you know better than to get in his way. you stepped on his foot once and you remember wanting to disintegrate right then, but to your surprise, heeseung merely smiled, reassuring you that it was fine.
it was rather easy to fall into rhythm with him. you don't know if it was your doing, or his, or both, but it's like the two of you spoke the same dance language. there were barely any words uttered, but understanding passed between you effortlessly.
he was kind of sweet too, always asking if you've eaten, if you need any more water, if his hand placement was too much. you appreciated it, a far cry from some other people you've worked with that barely spared you a glance. you'd be fine with the bare minimum of friendliness, if it was all out of courtesy that heeseung asked you all these questions. but the way he stares down at you attentively has your stomach churning. whether that's a good or bad thing, you've yet to decide.
your eyes draw towards heeseung as he pockets his phone, his gaze somehow finding yours in a split second. before you could look away, he smiles, waving rather cutely at you.
you wave back politely, quickly signing a 'have you eaten?' to him. heeseung shakes his head and points back at you as if to ask, 'how about you?'.
you reply no and heeseung pouts.
'eat soon, okay?' he mouths to you. you hold up the 'okay' sign and heeseung nods, satisfied.
sion and serin fall silent as the three of you watch heeseung gather with the rest of enhypen, all seven excusing themselves to go eat. heeseung locks eyes with you briefly one more time and smiles, eyebrows raised.
and then they were gone.
"what was that?" sion asks, grinning like a feline.
"he's being nice," you contest. "doesn't jungwon tell you to eat when you should?"
sion balks at that, clearing her throat. "he does. he's very considerate."
"but that," sion continues. "that look is different, ________, i'm telling you."
serin nods enthusiastically in agreement. "right? do the two of you talk outside of practice?"
"you guys are so unprofessional," you complain, though a smile creeps onto your face.
"and, no, we don't."
---
"did you see my kakao request?"
you peer up at heeseung, eyebrows knitting together. it takes you another few seconds to register what exactly he was asking.
"you added me on kakao?" you finally ask back.
his hands are in his pockets, a fluffy blanket wrapped tightly around his frame. the weather in poland is more than a little chilly this time of year, a struggle for you all as you drag yourselves through the music video filming.
heeseung chuckles, his eyes squinting down at you. "yeah, last night."
"sorry, i must have missed it," you reply sheepishly, pulling your own blanket tighter around your shoulders. "i have about a dozen requests at any given time."
"ooh, someone's in demand," heeseung teases, nudging you lightly. you laugh nervously, scanning the set around you.
the members and their respective dancers have gotten friendly over the course of the comeback preparations. nothing too chummy, but all of you are comfortable enough to strike up conversations with each other on and off schedule. it was nice, getting to know the guys of enhypen a little better.
but the way heeseung caught up to you in this dark, secluded part of the set where you were merely looking for cell service makes it look a little too suspicious.
'what do you want?' is what threatened to come out of your mouth. you often think you would rather be dead than be caught in a dating scandal with an idol. not that you're assuming anything, but you've seen this behavior before, and heeseung really is just a man at the end of the day, so who's to say that—
"um, is everything okay?" heeseung asks, waving a hand in front of your face. you blink, your surroundings coming back into view. you look up and are met with heeseung's grey-colored lenses. you stop a shiver from running down your spine at how hard he's staring down at you.
"yeah, sorry," you respond hurriedly, clearing your throat. "what i meant to say is, i have messages from people asking for dancers for a program or shoot or what-have-you, all those stuff."
heeseung nods before looking away, eyes scanning the staff as they arrange the set. before neither of you could say anything more, jake's head pops out from behind a stack of equipment boxes.
"hyung? oh, there you are," jake says with a start, noticing you at the last second.
"hi, _______!" he adds cheerily.
you smile warmly at him, slightly relieved that someone is there to interrupt.
jake turns back to heeseung. "jungwon says to drop by the hair and makeup tent for a bit."
heeseung nods at the younger, brushing past you to get to jake.
"see you in a bit," heeseung says, fingers lightly curling around your forearm. you tense up but nod in reply.
"see you," you return weakly.
you wait until the two of them are gone before sighing, stalking off to the other end of the set to where the dancers' tent is set up.
---
studio choom is one of your favorite parts of being a backup dancer. the staff was nice, the set was wide and airy, and the lighting was amazing. your excitement concerning the last part was evident in the way you couldn't take your eyes off your phone as you held it in front of your face.
"i look so good," you comment with a laugh, surveying yourself on the camera display. "even with the mask and all."
"right?" serin agrees from behind you, getting into frame with you. you quickly snap a couple photos.
the director barks out an order to get into blocking and you quickly hide your phone away, silently thanking in your head one of the other dancers for bringing in the large tote to hold all of your devices.
you walk under the bright multicolored lights onto the actual filming set, hovering over the general area of where you're supposed to be blocked. you wait for the members and other dancers to find their places, eyes downcast as you try to find your exact spot.
a hand brushes your arm and you look up to see heeseung smiling down at you.
"you look good," he mutters quietly before walking to center, getting on his hands and knees as he settles into his starting position.
serin passes in front of you, eyes expressive enough that you instantly get what she's saying despite half of her face being obscured by the mask.
'what was that?!' her eyes seemed to cry out.
you shake your head. 'i have no idea,' you respond as best as you can with your own confused gaze.
the director calls out another command and everything else is dropped as all of you fall into performance mode. autopilot takes over you, every take passing by quickly, much to your surprise.
an hour and a half later and on the last take of the chorus, you find yourself restless, stomach already grumbling. you pick at your long black gloves, wishing for this day to be over.
enhypen are in formation in front of the camera, with the dancers at the wings, ready to approach for the chorus. somehow, despite blending into the shadows of the set, heeseung finds you, tilting his head to the side in a sort of greeting.
you mirror his action and heeseung instantly smiles. you can't help the grin that breaks out behind your mask.
"last take, everyone!" the director calls out.
with a little more difficulty than you'd like to admit, you rip your gaze away from heeseung's, a tingling feeling settling in your stomach.
---
almost all thoughts of heeseung disappear from your mind as you get home later that day, too exhausted to pore over every interaction you have with your dance partner. you lay sprawled out on your bed, having just finished freshening up, eyes heavy as you feel drowsiness creep into your consciousness.
the keyword is almost.
you hear a notification ping from your phone and your sleepiness is immediately replaced with pure adrenaline. your read the notification over and over again just to make sure you weren't imagining it.
이희승 (lee heeseung): hi
you sit up, your heart pounding. leaning against your headboard, you watch as another message comes in.
이희승: you up?
you snicker, opening your kakaotalk app. heeseung's name is at the top of the chat room, easily indicating just who you're talking to. you quickly type a reply.
너 (you): ooh he finally messaged ㅋㅋ what an opening tho
you chew on your lower lip as you send the message, the 'read' sign immediately appearing. you watch as heeseung types out his reply.
이희승: lol sorry did that come off too creepy?
너: not at all. why the sudden message tho? was my performance that bad that it has you staying up at night?
이희승: oh no nothing of that sort. just wanted to say thank you for your hard work today
you blink, cheeks growing warm. he messaged you at ass-o'-clock to thank you?
너: thanks! you did super well today too
이희승: don't i always? (pouting face)
it's at this moment that you realize, without a shadow of a doubt, that lee heeseung, a member of a globally renowned k-pop idol group, is flirting with you.
you lock your phone, laying back down on your pillow, contemplating on what to do.
you could always flirt back, then act as if nothing happened the next time you see him. see how far the two of you can take it. you might end up sneaking around green rooms and closets, but, hey, half of the fun is the thrill of getting caught. or you could shut it down now, rejecting him gently because what kind of unprofessional loser would fold at the slightest display of romantic interest from an idol?
you sigh.
you would.
you're a (slightly) unprofessional loser that would fold at the slightest display of romantic interest from an idol.
you open up your phone, fingers moving at lightning speed.
너: my bad. you always do well (wink)
a whole minute passes by, heeseung typing then stopping then starting up again, before he stops once more for a few seconds. you feel anxiety seeping out of every pore on your body.
이희승: good girl ㅋㅋ that's what i like to hear
you gape at your phone, a strange tingle spreading all over you.
you take a moment to scream into your pillow.
---
you're waiting for it to boil over. to culminate into something. for shit to hit the fan, as you would inelegantly put it.
you left heeseung on read last night, at a total loss for words at his reply. he doesn't press further, either. in your mind, he's probably thinking one of two things: 1) that he deeply offended you, or 2) that he's achieved the desired effect.
you don't have to think too hard about which one of those is true.
you enter the assigned green room to you and the other dancers, poking your head in first, eyes landing on your coworkers lounging about.
"oh, _______!" sion calls out excitedly. the rest of them turn their heads to you, erupting into similar squeals.
"close the door!" serin orders. too stunned to protest, you do as you're told, leaning against the wall as all of your friends talk over each other.
"heeseung was looking for you," sion's voice rises above the rest and your eyes unconsciously widen, your heart rate picking up.
"yeah, he came here himself and asked where you were," serin adds, nodding.
"what's going on with you two?" another dancer, yeeun, asks in a singsong voice.
"n-nothing's going on," you say with a laugh, waving them off nonchalantly.
"like we'll believe that," sion retorts. "we'll keep it a secret, promise!"
the rest of them agree, sounding like a chorus of schoolchildren hearing about their teacher's boyfriend. you sigh, setting your things down on the floor.
"we're messaging on kakao, that's all," you admit, shrugging.
"sexting already?" serin chides with a laugh. you give her a look as the room erupts in laughter.
"you guys are hopeless," you say with a shake of your head, but you can't help but laugh along.
"we're not sexting. not...yet," you add. there's a pause before the laughter grows louder, all of them throwing jokes around about being safe and dating scandals.
"luck you," yeeun says with a sigh. "it's taking jake forever to make a move."
the whole room shifts its attention to her and you breathe a quiet sigh of relief. your phone vibrates and you feel your whole body grow hot as you read your screen.
이희승: come out for a second
before anyone can stop you, you quickly slip out of the green room, looking down in both directions of the hallway. to your right, you see heeseung standing outside enhypen's own waiting room, eyes staring at you intently.
with a nervous glance back behind you, you make your way to him. the hallway seems empty at this time, with most artists and staff in their respective rooms, the early prerecording hour hanging heavily over everyone.
"hi," heeseung says with a grin the moment you're near enough to hear him.
"hi," you respond, fidgeting with your hands. you scrape over your knuckles with your nails, waiting for heeseung to continue.
"about last night, i'm sorry if i went too far," heeseung begins, voice dropping, eyes looking around nervously.
oh.
so he's thinking option number 1.
"oh no, not at all," you reassure him. "i appreciate the gesture. i know you were only trying to be friendly."
heeseung raises his eyebrows as you say this. he purses his lips before speaking.
"friendly isn't the right word, exactly...," heeseung says, trailing off. he bites down on his lip, eyes momentarily flitting up and down over your figure.
it's your turn to be surprised.
"i see," you reply.
there's a long stretch of silence after this, both of you avoiding each other's eyes. an awkward laugh escapes you and heeseung follows, scratching at the back of his head.
you finally look up to meet his eyes, his pupils blown wide as he seems to consider his next words.
"i mean, i'm down if you are," heeseung says, stepping closer. "i won't hold it against you if you aren't, though."
you don't need to be told what his words meant. with the way he's staring at you right now, eyes unmoving but filled with something you can only describe as desire, you know full well what heeseung is implying.
"i am," you say after a moment. you're still fidgeting, hands clasped together in front of you. heeseung notices, his own hand coming up to lay on yours, stilling your movements. his fingers curl around your wrist.
"are we waiting after the recording or...?" you ask, letting heeseung pry your hands apart. he grips you firmly and you feel yourself practically igniting from his touch.
"i could use a pick-me-up right now" heeseung throws out casually, as if merely suggesting that the two of you get coffee. he jerks his head towards the door right next to their waiting room.
"this one's empty," heeseung informs. "i checked."
you can't help but grin up at him. he licks his lips as if he's looking down at his next meal, which you know, isn't that far from the truth.
"and no surveillance cameras, either," heeseung says, leaning down to whisper next to your ear.
without replying, you walk backward in the direction of the empty waiting room. heeseung follows, still gripping your arm, letting you pull him along. you never break eye contact, even as you reach behind you to turn the knob, pushing the door open.
only now do you avert your eyes away from him, stepping into the dimly lit room, a single weak lightbulb turned on in the farthest corner. with heeseung right behind you, you hear the door close, and without missing a beat, heeseung tugs you back, hands grabbing you by the waist.
he shoves you against the door, his face impossibly close to yours, your breaths mingling as you practically pant in anticipation. heeseung reaches down, locking the door, the click of the mechanism deafening in the silence.
"you can still say no," heeseung whispers.
"why would i do that?" you say before leaning forward to kiss him.
heeseung sighs against your mouth, his hand holding one side of your face to keep you steady. you're both still in your casual clothes, and you thank the heavens for this because your hands slip easily underneath his oversized hoodie. your palms smooth over his toned stomach and up his chest where you lightly rake your nails back downward.
you gasp when you feel heeseung roughly grab one of your boobs through your shirt at the same time he pushes a knee between your legs. you belatedly realize that it's today of all days that you've decided to wear a miniskirt.
"making my job easier," heeseung teases, as if able to read your thoughts. he smirks at you, planting a brief kiss on your lips as he angles you better on his thigh.
"your job...," you say in between labored breaths. you feel yourself growing wetter as you grind down on the taut muscle. "...is to fuck me before anyone notices we're gone."
heeseung grunts, pulling his leg away, ignoring the way you whine at the loss of friction. he pulls your skirt up roughly, letting it bunch around your waist. you gasp as you hear the sound of ripping fabric.
"heeseung!" you say in disbelief as he pockets your now torn-up lace panties. he merely chuckles, leaning in to kiss down from below your ear to your conveniently exposed chest, a feat made possible by your skimpy tank top.
"turn around, baby," heeseung whispers, planting another kiss, but this time, on your nose.
you stare at him for a moment, eyes bleary. are you really about to do this?
"please?" heeseung adds, eyes wide and round as he utters this one word so sweetly.
with weak knees, you do as you're told, letting heeseung press his chest flush against your back. you mewl when you feel his rough fingers slip between your slick folds, rubbing up then down, circling around the relative area of your clit. he finds it a second later, pressing down and working it expertly.
"fuck," you say, voice trembling. you let out a startled noise as you feel heeseung press a large hand over your mouth.
"no one can see us here but that doesn't mean they can't hear us," heeseung says against the shell of your ear.
"so i need you to be quiet for me, baby, okay?"
melting at these words, you could do nothing more but nod. heeseung kisses the back of your head tenderly. you hear him tugging his sweatpants down, letting it pool around his ankles.
you whimper when you feel a hard poke on one of your asscheeks, anticipation bubbling in you. you wriggle around, spreading your legs slightly apart and sticking your hips out.
"good girl," heeseung praises you, pressing his tip right against your hole. "doesn't need me to tell her what to do."
heeseung keeps his hand pressed firmly on your mouth, ensuring to muffle any sound that escapes you. and it's a good thing, too, because you're tempted to sob when you feel him push in, filling you in one swift motion.
"god," heeseung grunts as he bottoms out. "spent so long imagining what it would feel like to fuck you like this."
heeseung lets go of your face in favor of bracing himself against the door. you gasp out, the feeling of him quickly overwhelming you. and to think he hasn't even moved, yet.
"tried so hard not to let my hands wander but, fuck, you make it so difficult," heeseung says directly into your ear. he gives his first thrust and you decide to take on the responsibility of covering your own mouth because the stretch from his cock threatens a scream out of you.
"those goddamn stylists putting you girls in those tight dresses," heeseung continues. "and they expect us to keep our eyes and hands still?"
your eyes roll back at the filthy admission. heeseung grips you harshly by the waist and the whole world falls away from view when you feel him hammer in and out of you.
it's unknown to you how you could keep yourself upright, your knees feeling as if they could give out any moment. heeseung fucks into you roughly, your words about finishing quickly before your absence raises any questions seemingly spurring him on.
"so good, so fucking good," heeseung blabbers on, surely lost in his own pleasure. you lean back against his large frame for support and heeseung is quick to wrap a hand around your throat.
"yes!" you gasp out, blood rushing loudly in your ears as you feel heeseung squeeze down around your neck.
you wonder what you must look like right now. if anyone on the off chance would walk in on you and see your clothes and hair disheveled, your already short skirt pushed up even further, back arched in pleasure as heeseung fucks into your throbbing, drenched pussy. as if reading your mind again, heeseung prods against your mouth with two fingers, slipping them inside, leaving you no choice but to suckle on the salty skin.
at this moment, the two of you are possibly the very image of sin.
"squeezing me so tight, babe," heeseung breathes out against your neck. you gasp when you feel his teeth sink into the skin of your shoulder, soft moans escaping his own lips.
heeseung pulls his fingers out of your mouth and drool drips down your chin. he grabs at your neck once again, tighter this time, his other arm wrapping around your midsection as he picks up the pace.
"fuck, i'm getting close," heeseung practically growls, maneuvering the two of you away from the door.
"help me out, baby," heeseung pleads in your ears. "tell me how good you're feeling."
you finally let out the sob that's been fighting its way out of you.
"h-heeseung you feel so g-good," you comply, voice breaking from heeseung's vice grip around your neck.
"want you to ruin me like this every day. need you to f-fuck me in front of the practice room mirror," you continue, trying to find the right words despite the growing haziness in your head.
heeseung lets out a noise. "yeah? wanna watch yourself get split open like this? every day, huh?"
you nod frantically. "yes, yes, yes! d-didn't know i needed you this bad."
heeseung grows quiet as he holds you against him, hips snapping up erratically. you're sure that you've made a mess on the floor by now, seeing as you're absolutely drenched. the thought pushes you closer to your own release.
"c-cum for me please," you implore, feeling yourself shake at the thought of your impending orgasm.
"yeah, angel, gonna cum for you. g-gonna cum in this tight, gorgeous pussy. so good for me, letting me fuck them in s-some dark room right next door to m-my manager and members and all the staff, fuck—!"
heeseung abruptly stills, hand falling away from your neck. you take in a gulp of air, your fingers frantically reaching down to rub at your clit. you feel heeseung twitch and spill himself inside of you and you squeeze your eyes shut, coaxing yourself closer to euphoria.
finally, the floodgates open and your whole body seizes up from your orgasm. heeseung's face is buried in your neck and you can vaguely register him encouraging you through it.
you relax after a few seconds, leaning hard against heeseung as you feel your body nearly give out. heeseung pulls out but quickly replaces his cock with two of his fingers. you whine weakly, head lolling back against heeseung's shoulder.
"i got you," heeseung coos, working his fingers in and out of you at a languid pace. you twitch in oversensitivity, complaining how it's too much.
heeseung retracts his fingers and you catch him licking them clean just as you turn to face him. your eyes have adjusted in the dim lighting, heeseung's features coming into focus.
"you just tasted yourself," you say in half surprise and half bewilderment.
heeseung breathes out a laugh, letting his fingers out of his mouth with a soft pop.
"had to keep it in somehow," heeseung says nonchalantly. "seeing as i, ah, compromised your underwear."
you roll your eyes, giggling. "i think you more than compromised my underwear. you tore it in half, heeseung."
heeseung shrugs, donning an unapologetic expression. you swat at his chest playfully but you stop mid-laugh when you feel something drip out of you.
"oh god, fuck—," you start to complain, but before you could get another word out, heeseung drops to his knees, doe eyes peering up at you.
heeseung prods your legs apart, sticking his tongue out just in time to catch his own cum dribbling out of you.
"i'll clean you up, baby," heeseung says, mouth already pressing against your leaking hole.
all you can do is grab onto his shoulder, eyes rolling back as you feel your clit twitch with newfound arousal.
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