#but it does hurt when it completely overshadows the work i care about a lot more

[skitskatdacat63]

Ahhhhh I'm gonna gif Fernando's interview bcs he looks so pathetic and sopping wet(no bcs it legitimately hurt me), but at the same time, I'm going to die if it gets way more notes than the drawing I posted today UGHHHHHh. tumblr economy I hate you

[yuseirra]

**alien stage final round spoilers**

I really enjoy looking at the feelings and relationship dynamics between characters when I see a work. I feel I got a better grasp of/understood that aspect after seeing that most recent alien stage video, so I'd enjoy talking about it. Before I begin, I respect all the canon interactions and appreciate what they give us. The major "ships" for this, I am aware of, they are all very valid and I find all of them intriguing and interesting to see!

This particular stage, I feel, shows a really good insight of how Ivan and Till's love's are conveyed in contrast to each other.

Ivan appears to be very mannerly and he's very kind towards the fans, giving a lot of fanservice, he's the "good boy" of the group (excluding Luka who's simply "made for the stage") while Till tends to be the rebel. He swears towards the aliens, tries to run away, and does the unexpected on stage, he's a loose cannon as they say, but when it comes to "love", their attitudes tend to be the complete opposite.

It appears that Ivan's feelings towards Till is very complex for it to be defined simply as "love"(although I believe it is) although he's reserved on the outside, I feel he's the one has the hardest time dealing with his own emotions, since it does exist, but even he himself can't actually make out what they are. Idk how it's been translated but I saw him defining what he had towards Till as "shallow(얄팍한)" and apologizing to him as being his victim of it, I think it's the contrary. It's way too muddled and complicated, the artbook also mentions that he'd be the only one who can know what that feeling he has towards Till is. And I'm not even sure if he himself does in a complete sense. What I can see is that he does care. However, it seems like Ivan doesn't know how to care for Till in a way that'd come across to Till in a way that he'd like. In turn, he keeps acting in a way that'd provoke him to make the guy look back at him. He ruins the flowers Till treasures that he's received from Mizi, punches him, follows him around, nudges him, and acts pretty imposing and unpredictable when it comes to Till, he does things that Till doesn't want. It's out of his interest and fondness but it just can't come across to Till as a good thing. He doesn't hate him (he's still pretty fond of Ivan when I read the artbook) but finds him annoying. The artbook defines Ivan's feeling as one-sided, and sadly, it is very much that way. Ivan is the one that looks most mature out of the 4 kids that grew up together (Sua, Mizi, Till and Ivan himself) but they phrase Ivan as someone who's grown in terms of body but has never matured from being a child (P 208, 211 in the artbook) The problem here is that he never learned how to express his feeling properly. It always... ends up in a way that hurts Till. Till fails to comprehend or make out just what's happened as he sees Ivan dead in the final moments of stage 6. While Ivan manages to achieve his desired results of having Till finally look back at him, that's also all he gets. It was predictable, though. I feel like they'd have had a much friendlier relationship if they grew up in a normal, humane environment. In the end, Ivan does realize he's being selfish. I personally believe it's both selfish and selfless, a bit similar to how Sua was towards Mizi. They do things for the other but also, they do realize it's what the other party wouldn't enjoy/fully comprehend while they do it. But they can't help it since they want the other to survive.

Till's feelings for Mizi has been always there, I kind of feel it could get overshadowed a lot from how immensely big and impactful Ivan's actions have been portrayed throughout the series, but I really appreciate how they acknowledged Till's feelings for her's also something that's very genuine and what's gave him light. I read that the idea that Till had a crush on Mizi was there from the very early stages of development from the artbook. That's a crucial part of his character. And unlike how the usual "reserved and gentle" Ivan can get pretty aggressive to get a reaction out of Till (nothing against Ivan, just analyzing) Till's love is also pretty much unrequited, but he acts very selfless and gentle towards Mizi, he never does anything that'd.. affect her in a strong sense except for trying to express his feelings through music. While Ivan pokes, punches, grabs, kisses his love to get his attention, Till tends to blush and run away. This guy is very aware of what his feelings towards Mizi is, yet I think he understood his position and how much Mizi loves Sua so he keeps at a distance. His commentary about Mizi is that he believes "she's the most beautiful being in the entire universe and he felt reborn when she smiled at him." Oh wait?? he's an INFP??? REALLY??? Looking at the artbook and..;;hshshg to imagine an INFP acting like him.. oh, he must have suffered A LOT;; I guess he was always on edge in those harsh conditions then. His feelings towards Mizi didn't really come across so much either, as it is said she thought Till was evading her, she wanted to be more friendly with him being the jolly and sweet person she is though.

The outcome for these two are very similar but different. When I watched Till's fate..(yeah, I was shocked he almost NEVER stood a chance against Luka despite how good he is too;;) I think I felt sad, but I was.. also happy for him that he realized Mizi does genuinely care for him. What Ivan got wasn't mutual, Till didn't understand.. and he was engraved, but as a source of trauma (I find this inevitable though seeing how that stage played out). Mizi smiled at Till and he was so happy to see her again he immediately lit up and tried to reach out to her while the stage was still going on, their eyes meet, the way Ivan and Till did on the previous stage, but it was welcoming and out of glee. Of course the one Mizi loves is Sua, but it was sweet to see Mizi really caring for Till as a friend. He's also what she's wanted to save, and Till was suffering after he thought Mizi was gone, but he got that sense of relief in his last moments. There was a comment I found that I found was quite insightful about this situation. He doesn't ask much in return, he always was that person that'd accept and appreciate what she gave him. Was that really enough for Till? I'm not sure but, he was still happy from everything Mizi had given him. I do see Ivan having a harder time being the same way because Till would have been so focused on Mizi to look back at him if he was as passive and accepting as Till was to her, and besides, I think the type of "love" they have may not exactly be the same although it can be categorized as "love". "Love" comes in many different forms and it grew in ways that were affected by their environment and personalities. I appreciate how that was depicted. I feel Till's love towards Mizi is just as powerful as Ivan's love towards Till was, it displays the different types of one-sided love.

I can talk about Sua and Mizi's dynamic too, with that I'd be talking about all the four major ships (I talked about Hyuna and Luka in another post earlier!) but maybe I'll do that another time.

However, I'd still like to mention what I found interesting in the artbook! They say that Sua wanted to protect Mizi's naivety and shield her from reality, because she found salvation in it. It was a place of escape for her, they say (p44) she gave Mizi hope that there would be a good ending, and that's how Mizi completely broke down the moment Sua was gone. Mizi really didn't see it coming while Sua actually did as she sang. Sua wanted to remain in that moment forever with Mizi, they say (p39) she depended on Mizi as much as Mizi did for her. The artbook gives out a really good insight in terms of about how the characters feel about things and it's very colorful and thick and great to see in general, so I recommend you to buy it if you are interested in the series. I'm not a hardcore fan of this piece (yet) but it was still worth every penny to me so, I bet it'd be a gem for those who really care for it~

[l1tw1ck]

Cyno's "Responsibility"

Bottom!FTM Cyno x Top!Masc Reader

↳ [Event Request] | AFAB Language Used

considering cuck tighnari

CW: Non-Con to Con, Somnophilia, Victim Blaming, Choking, Cheating, Objectification, Creampie

📝 W.C 922

You walk into Cyno's office, upset about the fact that you work overtime more than anyone else and about to put in your two weeks, only to find him fast asleep on his desk. He's drooling on whatever papers he was working on and mumbling a familiar name.

He looks so easy to take. You desperately need some release, and with the way you've been working all week you deserve it. It's not really your fault, it's his for giving you so much work to do.

You walk over to him and move his body onto the desk to have him bent over, moving the chair aside so you can stand behind him. You slowly slip off the clothes on his lower body, revealing his wet pussy to the cool air of his office. You briefly wonder what he's dreaming about, or who.

You don't bother getting him ready as you're venting your frustration out on him anyway, he deserves some pain. You take out your hard length and push yourself inside him.

“Ti- Tighnari..” Cyno grimaces in his sleep. You hold back a laugh, he must be dating that forest watcher. That makes this even better.

You slam into him, not caring if he wakes up. He feels too good to not move anyway. You run your hand along his back before spanking his plump ass. Cyno lets out a loud moan, gasping before calming down and staying asleep. You wonder how the General Mahamatra can sleep so deeply with a job like that, does he even know how vulnerable he is right now? You wonder how many times this has happened to him, if any. You hope you're the first, his reaction would be perfect.

“Hu..hurts…slow..” He mumbles.

You go faster in spite of him, grabbing his hair and pulling him back. He breaks out into loud moans and finally wakes up.

He can't even make a proper sentence, all he can do is grip the table and moan like a bitch. “Ah~!” “Uh~~!” and “Ooh~!” are three of the few sounds that leave his lips. You can make out some "slow down"s and a "wait" but they're overshadowed by his moans.

You fuck him so hard that anyone from outside could hear how much of a whore he is. He's crying but they're not tears of pain, that you know for sure.

“Fucking whore, do you even want me to stop? Do you like my cock that much?” You spank him. “Do you even care about Tighnari, General?”

Cyno finally realizes it's not Tighnari inside him, he was too sleepy to process that you're much bigger than he is. He feels too good to deny you so he shakes his head.

You chuckle. “You’re a slut, you know that? A cheating cock slut.”

Cyno rolls his eyes back, legs shaking as he comes. He’s completely out of his mind.

You turn him over and he finally gets to see you, the person who's making him feel so good, his subordinate. “You like being called that? A dumb good for nothing slut?”

He gives you a loopy smile, choking out giggles when your hand grips his neck. He's still in a dream world.

“What would Tighnari do if I came inside? If you turned out pregnant?” Your other hand plays with his bottom growth. “If he found out you were whoring yourself out to your subordinate?”

Cyno doesn't respond, too preoccupied with his own pleasure to even consider what you said. He does respond to you coming inside him though, happy babbles leave his mouth as he feels your hot spend flooding his insides. You haven't had much time for yourself thanks to him, so you let out a lot while still retaining a lot of stamina. Meaning you can keep fucking him despite having come already.

“Gonna turn you into my little cumdump, baby.” You lick your lips.

“Ye- yes~!” Drool dribbles down his chin.

“You want that? You wanna be used as a fucking cocksleeve, Cyno? Just a hole to stuff my cum inside?”

Cyno only grins wider.

You scoff. “How are you so easy?” You slap his tiny dick. “How many guys have fucked you like this?”

Cyno doesn't respond, feeling himself getting close again.

“Answer me, slut.” You spit on his face, landing another slap to his dick.

“O- one- Nari~!” He answers, voice increasing in pitch. So zero, you note. Tighnari doesn't count since he's his boyfriend. “Gon- uh~ uh~!” He squirts on your cock.

“Gods, what a slut.” You shake your head and let go of his neck. “I kind of feel bad for Tighnari. Kind of.”

Cyno brings his hands to his nipples, pulling and twisting them around with his eyes glossed over.

You smirk. “What do you love more, Cyno? Tighnari or my cock?”

“Yo- your cock~! I wuv yo- your cock~!”

“Wuv?” You laugh. “Poor Tighnari, he has no idea his boyfriend is at work getting his little pussy destroyed and acting like a stupid, braindead slut.”

You fuck Cyno in multiple positions, sticking to your word and using him as a cum dump. You come inside multiple times, so many that his stomach is slightly bigger than normal.

After almost two hours of fucking, you finally pull out and force him onto his knees, cum dripping onto the floor.

“Clean it.”

Cyno quickly does as you say, sucking your length clean.

You make yourself look presentable and leave the room. “Maybe we can have fun again tomorrow.”

[friendlyfaded]

Thoughts on veglasko?? Would luv to know ur opinions on it!!

I think about this a lot. Like, a lot. I feel like that's not surprising, though, considering I've made it Abundantly Clear that I'm both a major Vega simp and a huge Lasko kinnie. So this has been in my brain for a while lol.

To address the elephant in the room here, in canon, there's no way this would ever work. I'm well aware of that. Freelancer and Gavin both loathe Vega, and Lasko loves both of them too much (platonically or romantically, take your pick) to associate with someone who caused either of them harm. But, if we were considering a universe where Vega never hurt Caelum, and as a result, never crossed paths with Freelancer or Gavin, there's a possibility.

I don't know if you know this, but there's a lot of really negative feelings at most higher education institutions. Like, if you ever get the chance to listen to your English Department talking about other departments, colleagues, other people's work, etc, you'll see what I mean. Academia often becomes this huge pissing contest built on passive aggressiveness and superiority complexes, complete with gatekeeping and general snootiness. Needless to say, I feel like it would be a very viable place for Vega to find food.

So he's unformed, just kind of vibing in the departmental offices building, when he feels concern instead of annoyance. He finds a professor in one of the offices talking to a student. Most of the teachers did genuinely care about their students, but that care tended to be overshadowed by their own self image. This professor wasn't trying to put on any kind of act, though. He just wanted to help.

Vega is intrigued. He doesn't often care much about humans, but this one seems so much softer and more passive, for lack of a better term, than many of his peers. He doesn't make backhanded jabs at his coworkers. He doesn't get annoyed when people ask him to run copies or deliver things to the registrar's office. He just does it, and he's genuinely happy to help.

I'll be honest, I have no idea how they would end up meeting. My best guess would be that Gavin would notice some demon he doesn't know hanging around Lasko and confront him. When he realizes that Vega is a sadism demon, he's even more confused, since Lasko has literally nothing for him. Vega ends up admitting, in his roundabout way, that he's fascinated by Lasko and is curious to know more about him. Gavin (very astutely) points out that the best way to learn more about someone is to talk to them, not to stalk them.

Vega figures he can try it Gavin's way, if only because he doesn't want to get chased off, and he ends up walking into Lasko's office one day, fully-formed and visible. Lasko understandably panics a bit, but he recognizes Vega's magic. Vega ends up having to explain that he's been feeding there for a while, and Lasko ends up kind of laughing because that's totally valid. Vega also says he's curious about Lasko, which catches him off guard since he has no idea why some sadism demon would even spare him a second thought.

They talk for a while, and Vega ends up appreciating that Lasko is willing to answer his questions. Better yet, he puts thought into his answers. He speaks with nuance and understanding of the topics he talks about, and Vega likes that. He's also drawn in by Lasko's gentleness. It's not something he sees a lot of in humans, so he's intrigued by it. On Lasko's end, he's very flattered that Vega seems to find him so interesting. Like, here's this tall, hot demon that just walks into his office and asks about how he feels about the frequent othering of demonkind and the prejudices against his race, and then actually listens to his thirty minutes of nonstop rambling about how discrimination of any kind, including against demons, does nothing but enforce damaging power structures and stir up tensions between empowered humans and demons to keep their attention off of the problems the government itself perpetuates.

Their relationship would be built on mutual intrigue and the connection I feel like they'd form with each other at being largely outcasted and misunderstood for reasons outside of their control. I can vividly see that "he asked for no pickles" meme with Vega looming over Lasko and glaring at some poor employee. This is his human, and nobody gets to cause him any pain or distress.

Mobile fucked up the extension to this post so I'm posting it separately lol

[maryholdenofthevalley]

My impression (or fandom impression I saw) of each TCF character.

Cale:

- scamming smile

- gentle af to children

- can destroy you with his words alone

- FIRE OF DESTRUCTION

- always bleeding but doesn't mind

- completely oblivious about others' concern for him

- ‘I just want a slacker life but lemme destroy this whole island and be a hero of two continents real quick’

- always think people around him are vicious but he is the scary one

- can be my daddy and my baby at the same time

Choi Han:

- innocent smile

- chill but is a biggest Cale simp

- loyal dog

- will bite you if you touch Cale dog

- can be gentle but also can be feral

- can't act for god's sake

- failed to cook one time and never allowed to come near the kitchen again

Alberu:

- sunshine smile that can kill me and make me blind

- everyone's sun

- everyone goes nut at his chocolate form

- always working

- always tired

- his tiring point tripled whenever he meet Cale

- powerful hyung and daddy

- when will he become kings its been twenty years

Raon:

- cute cute cute cute cute cute

- GREAT AND MIGHTY

- our mascot

- is the youngest

- always win when it comes to 'whos the best boy'

- wait he is stronger than Eruhaben now?

- :pikachuface:

- evolved from tsundere to the best loving child ever

- proud to be Cale's best child

- always bring food with him and give them to his family when they are hurt

- chubby

On:

- judges everyone else in the room

- the only one who can understand Cale's bullshit but let him be to the road of destruction

- probably see him as a stupid big brother than a dad

- best sister ever she always protect Hong

- cares for everyone in her own way but she loves to look down on them more despite being 12

- literally planned to make a 23yo her subordinate

- don't mess with her

Hong:

- is there for the food

- can poison you with your food

- claim to be Raon's big bro but always follow his childish thought progress

- he and Raon are inseparate duo

- I'm impressed he didn't go around saying he is Cale's younger brother/son and no one would doubt him

Rosalyn:

- ambitious and talent

- everyone's big sister

- everyone expect her to chill but she is not

- literally abandoned her throne to be a freelancer

- follow Cale's thought progress well, doting on and being doting on by him a lot

- (unofficially) Cale's twin

- Cale might think they are just business partner but little does he know he was her little bro a long time ago

- cute friendship with Choi Han and probably Lock?

Lock:

- big baby

- very little screen time despite being one of the original main trio

- character development being overshadowed by others' epic battles

- justice for the baby pls

- on the other hand him being unimportant is also a good sign because most people on spotlight suffered with angsty arcs

- knows that facts himself

Ron:

- first gramps base on timeline

- lemonade and lemon tea

- low-key doting on his children

- widower but a lot of people want him to remarried with themselves

- hot in assassin mode

- always be our best butler even after he had his own family business

- use metaphor so much, everyone knows you are creepy already so stop

Beacrox:

- creepier than his dad

- looks like he is still mourning his mom

- he is

- really he doesn't need to cosplay in Halloween at all

- talented enough to have his own kitchen in the Henituse's estate

- THE MANHWA RIPPED US OFF WITH HIS SMILE WHEN HE WAS SHARPENING BLADES 😭😭😭

- always described as the cruelest torturer but never got to see it in detail

- has OCD about cleanliness but it's fine

- that two layer gloves put on is hilarious though

- unexpectedly the best babysitter

- his little interaction with Choi Han is very cute

Eruhaben:

- first gramps in ranking

- is the oldest but doesn't look like it

- tsundere

- low-key doting on everyone but everyone knows

- no one really remember he is also a sword master

- since he refer to beat them up with fists more

- dark teenager phase

- GORGEOUS

- 'why am i here just to suffer' vibe

- picked Cale up by his collar like a cat

- ultimate cheat code beside Raon

[slugtranslation-hypmic]

Hihihi this is may be a weird question but is your opinion on the main hypmic cast?

In brief:

(Spoiler alert: It was not brief. Stuck under a cut for length)

Ichirou: He's a good kid. I wasn’t super into him at first, as main protagonists very rarely hold my interest, but I appreciate him now for the struggles he goes through and the growth he’s experienced across the series.

Jirou: Jirou is also a good kid in his own way. I didn’t know what to do with him for a while, but now I feel like I understand him too. I don’t think he quite gets what makes Ichirou be as loved as he is, nor does he really understand what makes people love him for who he is. But that’s okay. He’ll get it someday.

Saburou: If you had tasked me as a fourteen year old to create an idealized anime boy sona, I would have come up with someone shockingly similar to Saburou. I’m fond of him. He can be a bit mean at times in a very fourteen way, but deep down, he’s a good kid too. All the BBs are good kids.

Samatoki: I just can’t not make fun of him. His posturing is so ridiculous to me that I am constantly filled with the urge to clown on him. Oh, you think you’re so tough? You think you’re a big tough guy? Well, I’m just a little bastard; what are you going to do about it? But underneath the posturing, I do feel sorry for him and admire his strengths a lot. He’s a good kid too under a very funny exterior.

Juuto: I’m enjoying learning more about him from the BB/MTC+ manga, but I’m a bit surprised at how much of a dick he is even deep down. Still, he has plenty of good qualities too, and I like him in a vague sort of way. I’d throw fruit at him over a fence but wouldn’t put any malice in it.

Riou: What a delightful individual he is. The BB/MTC chapter about him really resonated with me. For a character so outwardly obsessed with the military, Riou has an incredible understanding of the weight of his actions and such a deep appreciation for every living thing. There’s a lot of his depth to his simplicity, and the level of care he exhibits towards everyone is delightful to witness. An absolute favorite among the cast.

Ramuda: Self-recognition through the other (derogatory). In all seriousness, Ramuda’s story arc and actions are great narrative tools for me to examine some things about myself and grow to try to be a better, more considerate person towards myself and others. I want to see him achieve freedom and happiness.

Gentarou: I enjoy Gentarou quite a bit, although I think he gets overshadowed by the other members of Fling Posse at times due to my sheer passion for Dice and Ramuda. He’s my favorite character to translate at the moment, which is apparently heresy among Hypmic translators. More than the sheer fun of writing his witty banter, I find him to be a very intriguing individual, and I’m excited to learn more about him. I want his happiness too.

Dice: Oh, Dice... He’s a really good kid in a way that the BBs could never be. He’s deceptively good, and he does choose to hurt other people and himself in ways that characters like Ichirou don’t. But he also finds the goodness in the oddest places, like a person finding a coin in a cracked sidewalk, and that’s delightful. His narrative is one of the most compelling for me. What a champion of a character.

Jakurai: Wow, what a good foil for Ramuda. Let me bounce narratives off of you like a mirror. I’m slowly learning to find him compelling in his own right, however. This is also a self-recognition through the other (derogatory) scenario, but there’s more of an emphasis on the derogatory part.

Hifumi: A funny little individual bearing a lot of sadness and a whole lot more courage. Like most of Matenrou, I admire him a lot, but I think that Matenrou resonates much more strongly with other people than they do for me, so I prefer to sit back and let other people appreciate them. I think he’s very brave and very fun to read/write.

Doppo: The biggest fucking mood in existence. When you move past the stereotypical aspects, you end up with another character who has a lot of deep flaws but also an incredible amount of courage. I’m excited to see where they go with him, but again, I’ll sit back and let others take the first row here.

Kuukou: Having already drafted Saburou, if you came back to me at age eighteen and asked me to make an idealized anime boy sona, you would probably have ended up with a character astonishingly like Kuukou. He brings me sheer joy. Astonishingly, I feel like Kuukou has exhibited the least growth out of any of the cast, and yet I do not mind a bit. He is the closest to the perfect man I have ever met. I would drop everything to be this dude’s homie if he existed in real life. Just a champion individual.

Juushi: Juushi’s a good kid. I’m very fond of him and like writing him, but much like Matenrou, I feel like he does a lot more for other people than he does for me. Therefore, much of how I work with him is less, “How do I enjoy this character as a reader?” and more “How do I nurture the traits about him that other people love?”

Hitoya: Hitoya strikes me as a damn good person with a lot of heart who sometimes lets his anger drive him a bit too much. He’s also utterly ridiculous, of course, but I try to write him with as much strength as possible to be present behind his words. He honestly seems like a great person to know in real life, not simply as a fictional character, as well.

Sasara: I have to clown on him to assert dominance. Joking aside, I admire the depths of his character and the growth he’s shown over the series. He can be pretty callous at times and goes to odd lengths to get what he wants, but I think he’s now starting to realize how much his actions affect other people. For a while I was really in his camp as a hardcore Sasara lover (back before he was a main cast member - I love writing quirky minor characters), but now I approach him with the idea mentioned above, ie how I can present him for other people.

Roshou: Whenever he’s around the rest of Dotsu Hon, I think he’s kind of an idiot. I mean that in the best way possible. It’s very endearing. Yet moments when he’s on his own are where I think he best shines, and I would love to see more solo material for him. He’s an incredibly good support character, and I admire his passion for his students.

Rei: I really enjoy asshole antagonists, which is why I liked Ramuda for a while before the clone story came up behind me and struck me into the ground with its mighty fists. Now Rei fills this role. I would love to learn more about him and team up with the Buster Bros to pelt him with rotten eggs in a fun bonding activity. I’m sure there is some strong backstory that will absolve him of at least some of his shittiness, but until now, I’m still not excusing his whole abandoning his children thing, not to mention the human trafficking thing he pulled with Ramuda.

Otome: I hate translating her, if only because she and Rei frequently talk about things in extremely vague terms that I have no context for. It’s hard to make her sound idiomatic in English while also not shooting myself in the foot by accidentally filling in the wrong information. But with that aside, she’s okay. I like her, I guess. Her motivations are pretty interesting.

Ichijiku: Ichijiku was written for people who are sexually attracted to women, and I’m not at all, so I 100% approach her in terms of her pull on other people. She’s fun on her own, though, and I’m impressed at her ability to walk in high heels. Her complete disrespect for everyone but Otome brings me no end of entertainment in reading and writing.

Nemu: YOU. Maybe this is some stupid toxic masculinity thing, but I always feel embarrassed speaking affectionately about male characters but not at all about female characters. Therefore Nemu gets all of my loveposting. She’s a wonderful girl! She has such a strong spirit, and I’m completely overjoyed that she’s making her own decisions and becoming her own character defined on her own terms. I want to watch her grow up big and strong. Fuck yes, baby girl! Fuck it up! I’m very proud of her.

[eliemo]

What's Important to Me is You

Summary: Roman just wants Logan to hear him. Logan just wants Roman to listen to him. It seems all they’ve managed to do is hurt each other.

Or: Roman knows he talks a lot. He didn't realize Logan never understood he wasn't being ignored on purpose.

Notes: I have a lot of Logan angst planned but that asides killed me and I just need them to Talk To Each Other Please

Roman knew he talked a lot.

He figured it counted for something that he was at least self aware. He wasn’t always the most conscious of it, delving into his own thoughts and ideas without warning, and his own boisterous voice often drowned out everyone else's, but it wasn’t like he was doing it on purpose!

He had a problem with interrupting the other sides, he knew he did. He was working on it.

He wasn’t trying to be rude. It was just...hard for him to control himself, especially when he was excited. Roman talked loudly even when he was trying to be quiet, and being the embodiment of creativity meant he didn’t exactly have a lot of impulse control.

Roman’s brain was loud. His thoughts were like a flood, idea after idea piling up and begging to be shared, his voice booming to be heard over his own head. He was trying to be better, but a part of him was almost afraid to be quiet. He didn’t know what to do if he couldn’t be heard.

He needed to be heard. He needed to voice his thoughts and share his ideas. He was Creativity. He needed to do his job.

He needed to be good.

It was probably counterproductive that the person he wanted to impress the most, the Side he craved validation from most of all, was Logan, when Roman ended up interrupting Logic more than anyone else.

He liked hearing Logan talk, even if half of it was contradicting Roman’s ideas, and half of it went right over the creative side’s head.

But Thomas wasn't a very logical person. Sometimes his creativity tended to overshadow the voice of reason. Logan didn’t like Roman’s ideas, deeming them implausible and unrealistic, which only drove Roman to talk more, to try over and over again to get Logan to listen.

They bickered, Roman tended to talk over and interrupt Logan, but there was no malice behind it. They both knew Roman did his best to control his outbursts, but sometimes silencing creativity was impossible.

At least...Roman had thought that had been the understanding.

He and Logan were arguing again, butting heads over Thomas’s plans for next week. Roman was distantly aware he kept interrupting, kept using his volume to talk over the logical side, but being aware didn’t always mean he could stop it.

Besides, this was how they worked things out. They would bicker for a few minutes, Roman would keep interrupting until he was done and then Logan would inevitably work out some kind of compromise Roman could settle with.

“You’re not listening, Pencil Head,” Roman said, despite being unable to remember a single point Logan had made in the last ten minutes. “Your schedule is boring. Thomas won’t have any free time for brainstorming or relaxing or anything that will help us come up with new ideas!”

“Roman—”

“My schedule on the other hand,” Roman continued over him. “Will let Thomas actually enjoy himself! Free time will get his creative juices flowing and I can come up with a video idea.”

“Your schedule is practically nonexistent. Thomas cannot just ignore his—”

“He can get your things done some other time,” Roman kept going. That was another thing he was trying to work on- once he started talking it was hard for him to stop. “Or he won’t. Thomas is fine. Who cares if a few things don’t get checked off your checklist.”

“I—”

“Besides, my schedule will be much more—”

“Roman,” Logan snapped, almost a yell, overpowering the Prince for the first time. “I understand that you hate me but for once could you just listen?”

Well that was one way to get Roman to stop talking.

The Prince froze, the rest of his argument dying in his throat as he stared at the logical side, eyes wide, mouth still open as his voice was effectively silenced all at once.

Logan seemed to be struggling to get ahold of himself, the anger fading from his eyes as quickly as it had appeared, face falling in a way that made him look almost small, quiet and resigned.

Roman swallowed, forcing himself to quiet down as much as he could before responding. “I don’t hate you.”

“You don’t need to do that,” Logan said, back to being stoic, emotionless Logic. “I just need to get my point across and then I can leave.”

Roman’s brow furrowed, hands fiddling uselessly in his lap. “I don’t hate you, Logan.”

“Alright,” Logan said. It didn’t sound like he believed him. “I apologize for snapping at you. I can leave.”

Roman’s chest felt heavy, guilt, panic, confusion waging war, and his throat tightened unbearably at the heartbreak in Logan’s voice.

“I… don’t.” Roman didn’t even have to force it this time, his voice barely a whisper. “You think I hate you?”

Logan flashed the Prince a look that made his blood run cold. “You are not exactly subtle about it.”

“I don’t—”

“I’m not angry with you,” Logan said, and he just sounded so… tired. “It’s fine, Roman. I should not have said anything about it.”

“Logan,” Roman tried, almost desperate. “I don’t hate you at all.”

Roman’s heart ached at the blatant confusion and distrust on Logan’s face, the logical side refusing to meet the Prince’s eyes.

“You… do act like it sometimes,” Logan said quietly. “I am aware you believe I do more harm than good. And… and maybe you’re correct, but—”

“I don’t,” Roman insisted. “You do so much good, Lo. Thomas wouldn’t be functional without you! I don’t hate you. I’ve never hated you.”

Logan shifted uncomfortably, reaching up to adjust his tie. “Well you… prefer not to have me around then. Which is fine, I understand that I—”

“No, I do,” Roman said, and he knew he was just interrupting Logan again but he needed him to understand. He needed him to see he’d gotten it all wrong. “Of course I want you around!”

“Right,” Logan muttered, fixing his glasses. “If you say so.”

“I do.” Roman didn’t know what to do. How long had this been going on? How long had he been making Logan feel this way? “I don’t know how to convince you, I… I had no idea.”

Logan slipped his hands under his glasses, rubbing at his eyes before dropping his elbows to the table, holding his face in his hands. Roman hadn’t… realized how exhausted he looked. He hadn’t been paying attention.

“You can continue with what you were saying,” Logan said, not lifting his head from his hands. “My apologies for interrupting.”

Roman couldn't even remember what he’d been saying. He barely remembered what they’d been arguing about. “Um… what were you going to say?”

“Nothing,” Logan said. “It’s not important.”

“I’d like to know.”

Logan sighed, slowly lifting his head and adjusting his glasses again. “Why?”

“Because I want to listen,” Roman said, keeping his voice soft. “And I’m… sorry I haven’t been.”

“No, it’s alright.” Logan still sounded confused and unconvinced, but...it was a start. “I’m sorry for yelling.”

“It’s okay,” Roman assured. “I’m sorry I was talking over you.”

“It’s… alright.”

Roman hesitated, wringing his hands together. “If… if you want to talk now I’ll listen.”

Logan straightened, stiff and almost completely unmoving, jaw clenched tight. “Maybe it would be better to take a break.”

“Oh,” Roman said. “Alright.”

“I... apologize if I offended you.”

“You didn’t,” Roman promised. “I really do want to hear your ideas, Lo. I didn’t mean to shut you down like that.”

Logan glanced at him, and Roman’s heart broke at the wariness in his eyes, like he wasn’t certain Roman meant anything he was saying.

But the logical side folded his hands neatly in his lap and cleared his throat, clearly fighting to compose himself again.

“I had worked out a schedule for the next few weeks,” Logan explained. If Roman hadn’t been listening so closely, he probably would have missed the barely audible tremble to Logan’s voice. “I arranged it so Thomas could… could have time to get his chores and work finished while- while still having t-time to—”

Logan’s voice broke, and he immediately slapped a hand over his mouth. He turned away from Roman, but not before the Prince caught sight of the tears quickly gathering in his eyes.

“Oh, Logan—”

“I’m sorry,” Logan said quickly, voice wobbling as he wiped furiously at his eyes. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry.” Roman was frozen, torn between wanting to reach out and give Logan his space. “I- I don’t… know how to fix this.”

Logan took a shaky breath, still turned away. “There is nothing to fix.”

“There is,” Roman argued. “I’m hurting you.”

“I’m just being ridiculous, we can step away and pretend this never happened.”

“No, Logan.” He took a risk and moved to place a hand on Logan’s arm, pulling away when the logical side jumped like he’d been electrocuted. “That’s not… we can’t do that.”

Logan hesitated, still staring down at his hands. “I’m not angry with you.”

“You can be.”

“That would be unreasonable,” Logan insisted. “I simply misunderstood your intentions. It doesn’t matter.”

“It does,” Roman said. “You’re important, and I made you feel like you weren’t. I had no idea you felt this way.”

Logan reached up to pull at his tie again, tugging at his collar. “I don’t… need to be pitied, Roman. If I’m not important, then—”

“You are,” Roman said, and then immediately backtracked. “I’m- I’m sorry, I’m so sorry for interrupting but you are. You are so important, Lo.”

“I…” he hesitated, shoulders impossibly tense. “Am trying to be.”

“You are.” Roman lowered his hand to touch Logan’s arm again, and this time Logic didn’t flinch. “I don’t know how to help. Tell me what you need.”

Logan shrugged, taking a steadying breath. “I would… like to be your friend. I know that is unrealistic, but… perhaps someday. If you’re open to it.”

And Roman… Roman was dangerously close to bursting into tears himself. He swallowed past the sudden lump in his throat, tightening his gentle hold on Logan’s arm.

“Logan,” he said, voice still nothing but a pained whisper. “You are my friend. We… we’re friends, Logan.”

Logan’s head snapped up, and the surprise on his face was what finally made Roman’s eyes fill with tears. “I am?”

“Yes, Logan.”

“Oh.” Logan’s gaze dropped back to his lap. “Then I’m… sorry for assuming we were not.”

“No, it’s alright. I’m sorry I… I didn’t make it more clear.”

Logan nodded, more to himself than to Roman. “I will… attempt to do better from now on.”

“You don’t need to be better,” Roman said. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“I should have known you didn’t hate me.” Logan finally met his eyes, red and watery. “I’m sorry, Roman.”

“I…” Roman hesitated, choosing his words carefully. “I must have done something to make you think that.”

Logan was still fiddling incessantly with his tie, either a nervous tick or a desperate attempt to ground himself, looking away once again.

“You… tend to talk over and ignore me,” Logan said, clearly uncomfortable. “I’m aware you get excited but it is a constant with me. I assumed you found me irrelevant. I understood that you’d prefer it if I was gone.”

“No, that’s… no, Logan.” Roman was definitely crying now, brushing away his tears and scooting closer. “That’s not it at all. Of course I want you here.”

“I… know.” Logan still didn’t sound completely convinced. “I appreciate you saying that.”

“I mean it,” Roman said. “I know I… talk over you guys sometimes. I’m working on it, I promise I just… I want you to like my ideas so bad, Teach.”

Roman laughed, bitter and humorless, guilt clawing at his throat. “I get so determined to get you to listen, and I get so excited when you do so I… forget. I forgot to listen and I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. It’s not fair to you but I… I had no idea. I didn’t know I was making you feel like this.”

“Oh.” Logan’s hands finally dropped from his tie back down to his lap. “I… do enjoy hearing your thoughts. I always have.”

Roman swallowed, his breathing still shaky. “That’s… thank you.”

“I suppose I… also owe you an apology,” Logan said, continuing before Roman could object. “I could have made more of an effort to show my admiration for your work.”

“I… Logan, you don’t need to—”

“Your ideas may not always be realistic,” Logan added, making Roman crack a smile. “But you’re passionate and intelligent and I enjoy working through them with you. Thomas wouldn’t be where he is without you, Roman.”

Roman felt light, his chest loosening, like a weight on his shoulders he hadn’t even known was there was just lifted.

Maybe it was just Logan, looking at him so earnestly, acknowledging Roman’s importance. The knowledge that Logan really did see him, listened to him was…

Oh.

They should have had this conversation a long time ago.

“Thank you,��� Roman said. “And… and you too, Logan. Really. I think you’re incredible and I just… I know I’m not great at listening. I’m working on it but it’s just… you’re important too, Lo. None of us would be here if it wasn’t for you.”

Logan cleared his throat, quickly blinking away and stray tears. “I- I really do appreciate that. Thank you.”

His voice sounded much less strained, and Roman’s shoulders dropped in relief. “Of course. I’m… gonna try harder to listen. I promise.”

“Thank you.” Logan met Roman’s eyes again, sending the Prince a small but genuine smile. Roman’s heart practically soared. “And I will make more of an effort to not completely brush aside your ideas. I know I can be a bit harsh.”

Roman just shrugged. “You’re just doing your job.”

“As are you,” Logan said. “And you deserve to be listened to.”

roman reached across the table to take Logan’s hand, grinning when the other side didn’t pull away, letting the Prince lace their fingers together and gently squeeze.

“We’ll work on listening to each other, then,” Roman said. “For now, how about we take a break and get something to eat?”

“That would be acceptable.”

Roman’s smile widened, tightening his hold as he guided them both to their feet and led them away from the table littered with discarded papers.

They didn’t let go of each other’s hands the whole way to the kitchen.

[codenamesazanka]

Warning: Rant, character bashing, lots of opinions

I'm saying it outright. I hate Deku. He is entirely underwhelming as a character, much less as the main character, the shonen protagonist of the series.

It's a 'different' type of dislike, though. I feel like I could've like his character. There's nothing greatly disagreeable about him, he's as inoffensive as can be, he's an optimistic, considerate, and polite boy, he's as plain as he is said to be, and that's fine.

My issue is that he's not the character he's said to be. I, personally, just don't buy that he "possesses a drive to save others that eclipses all common understanding", or that he's super intelligent with great analytical abilities that he actually applies on the battlefield, or, in general, he's as amazing or heroic or compassionate as he's apparently supposed to be. How can he be inspiring if he barely challenges any aspects of the society he lives in. Deku is a super good example of the terrible use of "Tell, Don't Show". We're told about his amazing traits, but he rarely follows through; when we do see hints of it, it's lauded but frankly I think it's typical behavior and (this though is not quite his fault) written so stiffly and awkwardly I'm not convinced.

(Honestly I might even call him a Canon Mary Sue. He has no interesting or distinguishable flaws, unless having a shit for brains attitude is one but that's not acknowledged by the narrative. Breaking bones is not a personality trait. If he has a Hero Complex, it's not even the interesting ones where he fucks things up even more; or carries crippling guilt about circumstances beyond his control; or focuses completely on saving people to the point of rejecting almost all human connections and keeping deadly secrets - which is All Might's big flaw.) (Well fair, he does this in the most recent chapter but did it need to take 300+ chapters? Plus I sense the way it's framed is that it's the radical, but right course of action.)

Say what you want about Villains and redemption/shouldn't be redeemed/too evil to be saved/justice/etc, but I think this 'Incredible Drive To Save' should've included Villains from the start. Why does Deku want to "Save people with a smile on his face"? Assuming it's empathy, he should have felt some towards everyone he encounters, whether it's sensible or not. "Why are you so angry?", "You shouldn't go about things this way", "What caused them to be like this?", "Why is there evil in the world?" even. I'm still fuming over his Mall Encounter with Shigaraki, where Shigaraki pretty much reveals his damage: "All Might acts like there's no one he can't save"; but ultimately Deku goes "Wow, that sure is an opinion."

What kind of inane response is this??? There's little pushback from the narrative either, so this isn't pointed out as a failing of his (because, again, he has no big flaws). And he's supposed to be smart and caring. Yes, he does ask All Might right after the Mall Encounter, "Was there anyone you can't save?"; but essentially the replies he gets is "Don't worry about it" and Deku immediately largely puts it out of his mind "Oh whew, I was about to do some introspection and reflection". There isn't even the daunting, kinda-existential anxiety that people get when they realize it's impossible to save/help everyone - which is something, like, medical workers have to learn to deal with - that sharp sense of the inevitably of death, of loss, failure, guilt. I'm not asking for him to come to the conclusion that everyone should be saved - he could've decided nah, Shigaraki is too ugly to be saved and I would've been fine with that, it's part of the character role and potential development - just that he should've had a conclusion at all.

There are the latest chapters where Deku decides he wants to try saving Shigaraki first (though killing him is still on the table), true. Him wanting to save Shigaraki after seeing AFO merged with him, after seeing The Crying Child - but see, I don't think it qualifies because I think it's the bare minimum about of consideration, the typical response to seeing the body horror of warped, fused flesh, to seeing a small sad little boy. I think it shouldn't require "You look like you needed saving" for a true Hero to consider saving someone. Not for someone who is supposed to be unique and special in this regard.

*

I've complained about this before, but the trouble with Deku was evident from the very beginning.

Again, Deku wants to save people with a smile on his face, and again, I’m assuming it’s empathy. We're shown this on the very first page, as he attempts to protect a friend(?) from bullies, but imo like it felt groundless because who was the kid he was protecting? We never see him again. Did Deku's standing up to Bakugou work, and the kid was saved? Or did they both got beaten up; but afterwards, being the kind boy Deku is supposed to be, he still gets to his feet to help the boy, to apologize for failing.

But more significantly, this theme of saving was overshadowed immediately by his focus on superpowers - that he was quirkless. Next page, his focus was on ‘Woah, giant villain and superpowers!’ Instead of like. Helping people. (Though I chalk this up to early installment weirdness)

What should’ve happened if the theme was ‘SAVE PEOPLE’ Is something like: The opening sentence being “People are not born equal. This is the harsh truth I learned when I was four. I knew that... but despite my powerless, I still wanted to help. That was my first and last setback.” And the panels/images themselves (of little Katsuki and his friends) implies that people on the world thinks you need power to help people.

When he saw the villain attack on way to school, Deku can be wow’ed by the spectacle! But then he notices a kid crying and offers to help find his mom. He can be interrupted by a Hero saying he (the hero) will take over, he can find the mom and realize he’s late for school (and so that shows he’s willing to sacrifice something of his to help others! Because of his altruistic nature!). A scene like that, of him helping the lost kid, we would know that he wants to help *anyone*. At school, though, he still gets bullied for not having powers. So he’s mulling over that when he meets All Might, and asks the question.

It proceeds as usual for the next few events: When the sludge monster attacks Katsuki, he can still go gawk at the scene. He can still hesitate. In canon, it's only when he realized the victim was his friend that he jumps into action, which I thinks undermines the theme of 'wanting to save indiscriminately'. IMO, it would've been better that Deku sees it’s his friend, but he still hesitates. “There’s nothing I can do right? All Might himself said so...” But when he sees Katsuki’s *face* of fear, he runs to help. Instead of seeming like he helps only because he realizes it’s his friend, he helps because he feels too deeply about trying to save Katsuki.

Admittedly these are minor, personal critiques; but all in all, the first chapter fails to establish Deku is the willpowered, champion of wanting to save people he's supposed to be.

--Which is fine, if it's acknowledged in the story later, that maybe he wasn't the True Blue Hero he's supposed to be at first, but he can change and still become one. But it's not - Deku is apparently special, without anything special to show for it.

*

I read the one-shot "My Hero" - the prototype for this series - that Horikoshi published years ago, before My Hero Academia was created. I also found it underwhelming, but that was due to personal tastes (I wanted more explosions and dumb violence); as a story on it's own merit, the logic and progression was solid.

The Villains Heroes fought were 'Aberrations' - true inhuman monsters that showed no sentience that would eat people - so the focus could be solely on saving humans. The main character - Jack Midoriya - his original goal was less 'save people' and more 'become a cool hero', before learning that saving people is what true heroism is about, hero license unneeded. (Moreover, he really did 'save' someone without being a hero - by working hard, he was preventing the company from becoming ruined completely, which the CEO had confessed and thanked him for. )

This version of Midoriya didn't exactly needed deep empathy or compassion for that, just a strong willpower, which he effectively demonstrated by chasing after a childhood dream even as an adult salaryman in a tanking company, even though he had anemia and no training and no license. He insisted on this, to the point of getting hurt by being dumb, of being petty over someone dissing the Hero who inspired him in the first place, of skipping out of work and going vigilante. Not the most upstanding guy, but he came through in the relevant themes of the story, in being the character the story needed him to be.

Jack Midoriya was an unimpressive, weird-looking, weak, pitiful, somewhat selfish, awkward salaryman with no great aspects that 'eclipses all common understanding'. But he was a far stronger character than his incarnation Izuku Midoriya could ever be (so far).

[katsulia]

Could i ask for an oikawa version of he offends you

He offends you - part4

featuring : Oikawa, Daichi

genre : angst to fluff

Atsumu and Kageyama version + part2 / Kuroo and Tsukishima version

Oikawa

"Babe I'm home! "you shouted and slammed the door behind you. And no sooner had you taken off your shoes than your boyfriend appeared in front of you like a dog excited to see his master come in.

"Y/N-chaaan," his voice rose in pitch as if to accompany his exaggerated pout. Automatically his arms came around your waist and although you liked being in his arms he was somewhat suffocating. The embrace lasted a few more seconds before he let go of you and you were able to move towards the living room. Your feet were like compote and you didn't want to move. Oikawa joined you.

"So how was your day? "you asked him as you put your bags on the floor before dropping onto the couch. Oikawa sat down on the couch and put his head on your lap.

"I had to say goodbye to my beautiful girlfriend who preferred to go shopping with someone else although we all know that I have the best taste in fashion ..." you couldn't help but hit him in the back of the head as Iwaizumi would surely have done. "Ouch! YN-chan! That was undeserved! You make me suffer even more when I already had to put up with your absence today! "You looked up at his idiocy before he resumed his story. "So I stayed alone in this house, far too big for one person, and I waited for hours for her to do me the honor of resurfacing. "At this level he could easily overshadow Shakespeare's best tragic characters, after all it was Oikawa Tooru. But it was all part of his personality and it never failed to make you laugh.

"Well, since you ask me, I went shopping, away from my very clingy boyfriend." At these words he opened his eyes wide and put his hand on his chest as if you just gave him a blow which makes you laugh out loud. "How dare you? "You tried to catch your breath and kept answering him with a big smile on your face. "I'm kidding, of course I'm kidding. But I still put my day to good use and I finally found a little black dress that was missing in my wardrobe." You hadn't really gone out with the idea of buying a dress, but you had completely cracked at the sight of it and it was a good thing since you didn't have one of those. Usually you were more hesitant as for the purchase of dress and skirt but this time you were confident.

"It is true? I want to see that right now!" Oikawa's eyes were shining and he got up immediately so you could go change. You rolled your eyes but deep down you were touched by his almost childish but totally adorable reaction. While you were pretending to be lazy, he took your hand and pulled you from the sofa. "Go and try it on! I'll wait here." You knew very well that he would not change his mind as he is and you went to your room, sticking out your tongue.

The dress was simple and basic but you liked it very much. You put it on quickly and took a little time to admire yourself in front of the mirror. For you, who was used to seeing you always wearing jeans, it was a nice change but not that unpleasant. The result will be even better when you have tanned legs but even so it was very nice. You took a deep breath and went to join your boyfriend in the living room.

"Tadam!" At the sound of your voice Oikawa took his hands away from his eyes (yes, he was always in excess). You even did a spin around and laughed a little to satisfy the desire for a show that he always liked. "I love it so much! My girlfriend is incredible! Come over here so I can admire the seams more closely!» Immediately you were pulled towards him and you fell on the couch laughing. With a masterful stroke he made you glide on his knees and positioned you comfortably on his legs. You came to put your arms around his neck while his left hand firmly grabbed your waist and his right hand stroked your thigh. "So it's true, do you like it?" It was obvious that Oikawa was totally seduced by what he saw, but using your seductive voice was always tempting in those moments. He was very close to biting his lips. "More than anything else. We should go back to that store, very good work. By the way, which one was it? I would bet on Zara!" You nodded, because he had found out which brand it was right off the bat. But it wasn't that surprising from him. "How did you guess? I bet you looked at the label! No, you saw me put the bag there!" You exclaimed. "Hm not even. But Saya used to go out there a lot and I remember a dress of hers that was in the same style. How Sherlock! " He winked and smiled a big, charming grin.

You didn't want to smile at all. He associated the dress you were wearing, the one you were so happy to have bought, with his ex Saya. Your face decomposed and immediately you began to let go of his hold on you. Does that mean he was still thinking about her? Probably. You wanted to take that dress off right away and throw it away.

Oikawa didn't immediately understand your reaction and wanted to hold you back, but he could sense that you wanted to let go of him. When only five seconds was all right? But it was when he saw the look in your eyes and your head down that he thought about what he had just said. Saya. His ex. Your dress. He was a complete idiot. There was no way to make up for it but he just wanted to show off his detective skills. If Iwa-chan had been there he would have hit him right away and it would have been deserved. But he didn't need him for that, he was already regretting it and he was cursing himself with all the insults in his head.

"Wait babe! That's not what I meant at all! Well ... I mean who cares about her!" His voice wasn't at all steady and he was at a loss for words. He had no idea what he could say in that kind of situation. If it had been the other way around, he would have taken your words too badly and would have been insulted that you mentioned your ex's name. But he was the one who had done that, he was the one who had hurt you and he knew full well that you didn't need that. "Yet you're the one who talked about her when I ..." He was totally panicked and knew he was at fault but wouldn't let you finish your sentence. "Yes I know it's me! And I shouldn't have! It's unwelcome and very inappropriate of me! But I assure you that it is not her that I think of when I see you! Or ever actually!" He had never spoken so fast before, but that's because he knew what he had just done was terrible and he had to act quickly so you wouldn't get the wrong idea. His throat was tight and he couldn't imagine how you must be feeling. He took your hands in his and forced you to look at him. "I'm really sorry... And um... I apologize... I see you all the time, everywhere. I assure you that you are the only person in my mind! And I know it seems like I just proved the opposite, but you are the most important person to me and the one I love the most, I would never want to replace you either with a person from my past or anyone else." Tears were flowing down your cheeks simultaneously and it was almost as if you were in a romantic comedy. (Nothing very unusual with Oikawa).

When he saw that you didn't totally reject his touch he embraced you tenderly. He kept whispering excuses while he was bent over your head. "I know Tooru. " It could still be heard in your voice that you were upset, but you couldn't remain insensitive to a totally vulnerable Oikawa. You, in turn, put your arms around his waist and took a long inhale into the crook of his neck. Next week you'll laugh when you think back on it, sometimes he was completely romantic that it was worthy of one of the greatest shojos in history. But you wouldn't change your relationship for anything in the world, let alone a partner. For the moment you were just enjoying this very intimate moment. It was sure that the food you brought back was cold now, but it didn't matter.

Daichi

These days your schedule was much less busy, which allowed you to enjoy some free time. But unfortunately this was not the case for Daichi, who could not leave the police station at his leisure. It wasn't dramatic either and you organized yourself to coordinate with his work hours. You often treated yourself to a late morning, although you always managed to kiss him before he left the house. During the day you were free to do whatever you wanted and when you weren't going out with your friends you would slump on the couch to catch up on your series. Sometimes, when it was possible, you would join Daichi in the city at his lunch break and find joy in eating ramen with him in the small restaurant near his work. And finally, when the clock struck 8 p.m., announcing Daichi's arrival, you knew that the best time of the day was coming.

You liked this domestic life even if the lack of productivity was becoming noticeable and you couldn't help but get back to your office files. To make up for this lack of activity, you would dive into the kitchen and try out a lot of new recipes. You even managed to make 100% homemade cold soba when you used to buy them at the supermarket. Daichi always rewarded your efforts with his best compliments and his most beautiful smile. Tonight was no exception to this new routine and this time you had perfected your sushi, eager to get your partner's opinion.

As it was Friday, you had decided to set the cutlery on the coffee table in the living room so that you could eat comfortably and quietly in front of the TV. But it was almost 8:15 p.m. and Daichi still hadn't come through the door. At first you didn't pay too much attention to it knowing that there was a lot of traffic on the weekend, but now the clocks were pointing to 9 p.m. and he still hadn't come in. You were immediately no longer reassured and decided to call him. When after two rings you thought he was finally answering you found yourself on his voicemail. Did he decline your call? It was absolutely not in his habit and you called him back thinking that he had made a wrong manipulation. However, you were not as lucky as the first time and as soon as it started ringing you were redirected to voice mail. As you looked at your screen in shock a message from him appeared. Your fingers were faster than your mind and rushed to display the notification.

From: Hubby I'm at the bar with some colleagues, I'll be back later.

At least you were relieved but somewhat disappointed. It's true that from time to time Daichi would meet his friends and that' s a good thing, he also made time for himself. Normally he had the decency to warn you, he knew you weren't going to say anything, it wasn't your style to complain about him going out with his friends. Despite the disappointment in your heart, you didn't intend to hold it against him and you were still going to enjoy your wonderful sushi. And if you even managing to hold back from eating everything you'd let him have some. That's how you spend your evening in front of the last episodes of Nightmare in the kitchen enjoying your own culinary art.  

On the stroke of 11:30 pm you recognize the sound of Daichi's car engine parked in front of the house. You were expecting him to come home later, but it suited you because it meant that you could go to bed at the same time as him. He carefully hung up his jacket and walked into the living room. His rosy cheeks were an indication of his alcohol consumption, probably in small doses since he'd been driving, and his face was adorable. He slumped down on the couch and he let out a long sigh, it must have been a long week for him.

“How was your day?” you asked him as you stroked his cheek with your thumb. When your fingers touched him he closed his eyes and began to relax.

“It was tiring, I'm exhausted.” You could hear the tiredness that had taken over his body in his voice only.

“I didn't know you were out tonight, but I left you some sushi, your favorite.”

“Aaargh Y/N.” He let a growl rise while keeping his eyes closed.

“Uhm what?”

“You didn't have to call me like that, it made the guys at the bar laugh, almost as if you were the cop!”

“Oh sorry to worry about you! I just wanted to know where you were !”

“You don't have to act like my mother, I don't need that!” He left a long puff and immediately you put some distance between the two of you.

It was quite rare for Daichi to get carried away like that and honestly you were a little upset. After waiting for him all evening and worrying about him, you probably didn't deserve such a reaction. And you knew it, that's why you didn't bother to answer and got up without saying anything; you just wanted this day to end and you hurried back to bed. Yet you couldn't help but recall what he had said. He had almost implied that you had embarrassed him by calling him in front of his co-workers. His words were still ringing in your head and you were just fidgeting in bed, it was impossible to fall asleep even with the lights off.

The sound of running water ceased and was replaced by footsteps signaling that Daichi had finished his shower and was on his way to your room. Immediately you rolled over to your side and closed your eyes. You felt him slide gently between the sheets and take place beside you.

“I know you're not sleeping”. You were surprised to hear him speak but you didn't move an inch. Even though you weren't sleeping you didn't want to talk to him at all.

“I don't want us to go to bed without fixing things.”

“No answer? Okay, I hope you are listening to me then. I'm sorry, I know you were just worried and if I were you I would have done the same thing.” You could hear the regret in his voice but it didn't change the fact that he felt embarrassed in front of others just because you called him. You turned and laid on your back with your eyes glued to the ceiling.

“Okay. But you didn't want me to call you in front of your colleagues. Are you ashamed of me?” Your tone was much colder and dryer than his which was totally understandable as you were in fact hurt.

“No babe, I would never be embarrassed to be with someone as incredible as you, it's just... I know I was going to behave like a simp after I drank to the sound of your voice... And they would never have let me down with that at the station... That doesn't excuse my behavior. But I want you to know that I love you and I would never want to hide you or for you to stop paying attention to me.” He was totally sincere at the time. It's true that it was completely dumb of him to act that way, but he didn't want you to think that he was ashamed of you or anything. Slowly you turned to his side this time and he took the opportunity to put an arm around your waist to bring you closer to him. You could smell his shower gel and his body heat. Instinctively you felt better and much more reassured until you nested your head in the crook of his neck.

“I love you.” You murmured softly and closed your eyes serenely this time. He kissed you on your forehead which made you smile and put you to sleep with butterflies in your stomach.

[firelxdykatara]

You’re doing a LoK rewrite, correct? Would be really interested in hearing how you plan on fixing Suyin’s character and the Lin-Suyin conflict because……. oh boy. Man there’s a lot to unpack there. This is what happens when we don’t let Toph just raise her fucking kids for the sake of pushing a stupid as hell narrative about working women and single motherhood.

I am indeed!

In... you know, the way I'm doing most of my big potential projects, in that I have a folder with some documents that have plot notes and... some day I may actually get full, finished fics out of them (h2o AU is in there, as is my voltron!atla fusion AU, and uhhhh my book 3 atla rewrite, and a few other things), so... but I will say that the docs I have for my LoK rewrite so far amount to roughly 4.2k words of just Plot and Character Notes, which may some day turn into words of Story, hopefully.

ANYWAY, POINT IS: yes, this exists, and I have Many Many Thoughts.

Including how the Gaang kids would shake out! Cause I know I'm doing Zutara, and maybe Tokka???? Although I don't wanna just leave Suki out either... maybe a throuple??? Or Sukka having an amicable breakup before Sokka and Toph get together--maybe she already has Lin by then, and Sokka helps support her through the grief of losing Kanto???? Idk honestly, I haven't actually figured any of that out definitively yet except that Aang was perfectly happy to settle down with an Air Acolyte from one of the rebuilt temples because he grew up and out of his crush on Katara pretty easily once he hit puberty and matured a bit.

UHHH none of which is actually an answer to your question, because it's a valid one! Which is why I've been sitting on this a while (10 days I'm so sorry) bc I haven't made any solid decisions but I've been letting it percolate around my head a bit. And the more I think about it, the more I really like the Sukka -> Tokka idea (and I don't want to kill off Suki since the kids all deserve their awesome Kyoshi warrior auntie in their lives, and also I want a Sukka kid to be besties with Iara [zuko and katara's youngest] so maybe she gets with someone else after she and Sokka split? I could be talked into Ty Lee/Suki actually, the more I think about it....), but obviously having a stable father figure and a Toph who is... not what LoK made her out to be will dramatically change the Beifong family dynamic.

That said, I think I actually have a solution. (I'm so sorry for what I'm about to do.) Toph has Lin with Kanto--and he passes away when Lin is two or three, which is why she has very few memories of her father. (Although none of this 'she doesn't even know his name until she's 50+ cause Toph didn't tell her daughters about their fathers' bullshit.) Sokka is there for her through it all (all of the gaang is, of course, but you know that it sometimes just hits different when it's someone you're also starting to fall in love with, especially when there are older and much more deeply buried feelings there that are now resurfacing, because at least in my version Toph was deeply in love with Sokka when they were teenagers, but he was in love with Suki and she also loved Suki so she didn't want to mess up anything about their family or the group dynamics by making her feelings anyone else's problem), they fall in love, get married and have Suyin.

(Sokka may jokingly refer to it as a shotgun wedding, but the truth is he wanted to propose well before he found out she was pregnant, his attempts just kept getting messed up in increasingly comedic fashion.)

Throughout all of this, Republic City has been established, Sokka is Chancellor, Toph is something of a defacto police chief--mostly because, at the time, no one else was willing to volunteer, and she jokingly offered to whip the law enforcement, but unfortunately everyone else at the meeting took her seriously. However, she is also the founder of the probending league, and basically her feelings about law enforcement are complicated and she actively discouraged her kids from joining the force which is part of why Lin did. How else do you have a teen rebel phase with a parent like Toph? (Which, in this instance, means tough and firm but fair, with a 'you break it, it's up to you to fix it' attitude and very little desire to actually control her daughters and their behavior.)

Ah, but here's the rub.

Suyin is ten years old when Sokka dies, and Lin is sixteen. I'm not sure how he's killed--maybe by Yakone, to tie it into my plans for Amon and book 1. (Note that I'm not sure when the Yakone bloodbending trial happened in canon, but it doesn't matter. The timeline I'm gonna build will be completely different post-comet, and I'll eventually write it all down so that I can keep things straight.) Which would incidentally provide excellent means of having Katara have a very personal stake in the Amon conflict, and perhaps color the fight between him and Iara, but I'm getting off track. And I think Sokka being killed by Yakone, and Toph being unable to protect or save him, or deliver her own brand of justice to avenge him (because Aang is there to stop her and.... shit probably got ugly, I suspect she didn't talk to Aang for at least twenty years after Sokka's death--and this isn't to say I think Toph is particularly violent or murderous, but in that moment, she absolutely wanted to kill the man with her bare hands, and however much she may have regretted it afterwards, she took a very long time to forgive Aang for stopping her in the first place), is what results in Toph stepping down as police chief.

She didn't withdraw from her daughters or fuck off into the swamp or anything (words cannot express how much I hate that part of her canon history), but she did grieve for a very long time. Lin, meanwhile, felt like it was up to her to keep her family together, while also feeling a desperate need to... prove herself, I think. And because her mother was so adamant that she not join the police force, that's exactly what she does. I think Lin completely misread Toph's intentions, too, and believed that the discouragement was because her mother didn't think she had what it takes, when in reality I think Toph was scared of Lin losing herself in the job like she herself had begun to, and eventually coming up on something she couldn't change or fix and making the same mistakes she had.

(I think Toph and Lin have communication issues largely because they are both headstrong and willful, but where Toph thought she was giving her daughters the room they would need to make their own way, what Lin desperately craved was direction and she felt like that was something her mother simply couldn't understand.)

Suyin, on the other hand, fell in with a bad crowd like in canon. I think that what she desperately needed was attention, similar to Lin craving direction, and Toph was trying so hard not to be her own parents that she went a little too far in the other direction and Suyin began to feel like it didn't matter what she did, her mom wouldn't care, or get angry, or discipline her, or anything. Lin and Suyin butted heads a lot growing up, too, especially after Sokka's death, because Lin tried to rein in her sister's behavior and this was met with resistance and derision because Suyin felt like Lin was trying to be both mom and dad and she was neither but her big sister would never admit to being just as lost as she was and it made her furious.

So when Suyin is sixteen, and Lin is twenty-two and new to the force, The Big Rift happens. Lin catches Suyin and her gang, tries to apprehend her, gets a scar on her face in the ensuing conflict. But instead of abusing her power and sending her problem child off to her mother before fucking off to the swamp to avoid the consequences of her actions, Toph tries to actually fix things. Suyin cools her heels in prison for a while, because she was paralyzed by guilt at the time when she hurt her sister (a few inches lower and she could have slit her throat), and was still there when Lin's backup arrived.

Uhhhhhhhhhhh..... I'm so sorry I rambled for so long, BUT THE UPSHOT IS: I think Suyin learned a bit about culpability and taking responsibility for her own actions, Toph realized that her daughters had different needs than she did at their age (and I think a lot of the problem was that grief clouded her own ability to connect with her daughters, and in trying to not be her own parents she lost sight of how to be the parent her own daughters needed), and Lin, I think, had to realize that she had never fully processed the loss of not one but two fathers and had turned to her job in order to avoid actually confronting the grief that had overshadowed her childhood.

However, she did not forgive Suyin, at least not right away--and she wasn't forced or expected to. Suyin understood that she crossed a serious line, she took her lumps and did her time, and no one shamed Lin for her anger. I think, as a result, she had less reason to hold onto that bitterness, and perhaps by the time the story actually begins, she and Suyin are on much better terms, though I haven't worked it out exactly yet.

UHHH yeah I went on for days lmao. All of this is subject to change, too, depending on the needs of the story whenever I get around to actually writing it all down, BUT these are my initial thoughts, at least.

[harrywritingsbyme]

The one where Harry makes Y/n feel good

Based Off Of This Ask

And This One

A/N: Here’s some older daddy!Harry filth. It was really hard to write today for some reason so I hope this doesn’t suck. Enjoy🙃

Even though making out with someone was pretty rudimentary to someone with a wide range of experience like Harry, it was a whole lot to you. There was something about being in his lap or beneath him that made you yearn for more. It managed to get your juices flowing, your toes curling, and your mind wandering. It made you want to feel more. The way Harry’s lips moved skillfully against yours as his tongue glided against yours was magical to you. He was able to light a massive fire inside of you from simply kissing and holding you. Even after he (or anyone else for that matter) pushed his cock into your for the first time Harry was still able to pull this seemingly desperate reaction out of you. There were so many things that you wanted to feel and do with Harry that you couldn’t stop yourself from getting worked up in these moments. It didn’t help either that Harry was always more than willing to guide you through and teach you things that you’d never known or felt. Since he was a bit older than you and well versed in the bedroom, Harry felt a strong desire to teach you and help you explore your pleasure, along with your likes and dislikes on a deeper level. With this being said, for you and Harry, making out was you guys’ gateway to learning, teaching, exploring, and pleasuring one another. 

After begging Harry to come over to your place for a snuggle and a movie, “patiently” waiting for him to arrive, and getting you both comfortable and situated in your bed, the two of you were finally able to have a much needed night in together. The two of you hadn’t been able to spend that much time together, let alone talk to each other that much for the past couple of days, so it didn’t take much time for the once declared movie night to turn into a catchup session. You used the leg that you had hooked across Harry’s waist as leverage to pull yourself on top of him and into his lap. All it took was one little I missed you kiss for you and Harry to be sucked into the whirlwind of a hot and very much heavy makeout session. The way you so innocently kissed him sent sparks through Harry’s body. All he wanted to do was keep your body close to his and continue moving his lips against yours. He loved hearing your muffled little moans and whimpers as he kissed and touched you. As the kiss continued, Harry’s arms wrapped around your back and pulled you closer to him. You could feel his hands stroking your back as he softly pushed his tongue past your parted hips. As he explores your mouth, his hands explore your body. He unwraps his arms from around you, his hands begin to stroke up and down your back. As he does this, your moans become louder and filled with pleasured overtones. When he reaches the top of your back, he brings his hands back around to your front; stopping right at your chest. His large hands engulf your breasts through the thin tank top you were wearing. The way his hands softly fondled the supple flesh heightened the dampening sensation you were feeling in your panties. His hands and his lips weren’t the only reasons why your panties were becoming more and more damp as the seconds passed though. As the kiss continued on, you could feel Harry’s erection growing. You felt his cock stiffen in his boxers beneath you. At certain points, you’d even feel him buck up into you a little bit. All three of these things combined were a surefire way for you to ruin your panties and make Harry take care of you.

And it definitely worked. 

You’d leaked so much through your panties that your arousal was beginning to bleed over into the fabric of Harry’s boxers. When he feels your juices against his cock, Harry immediately brings his hands down to your thighs and pulls away from your mouth. He swiftly yanks you up a bit so that you fall back a little and spread your legs. When he gets a better view, he can see that your panties are beyond soaked.

 “Look at yourself, leaking through your panties. Who’s made you this wet, puppy?” Harry coos, bringing a finger down to nudge at the wet fabric covering your little entrance.

“You.” You mumble quickly while trying to snap your legs shut.

“No baby, let daddy see your pretty peach please.” Harry pleads softly. When you don’t budge, he wraps his hands around your around your ankles and pulls your legs even farther apart. “Now who made you wet baby?” Harry asks again, but with a bit more authority than before.

“You daddy.” You reply clearly.

“Good girl. Is your puffy little clit tingly f’me baby.” Harry continues. 

“S’throbbing daddy.” You sigh, feeling his hands glide up your legs and stopping right at your thighs. 

“Poor baby, how do you want me to make it feel better?” Harry coos in response. Seeing how worked up you were from simply making out with him was filling Harry up with a strong need to give you his cock and push into you.

“Want you inside me daddy.” You simply say. 

“My cock or fingers sweetheart? Tell me exactly what you want so that I can help you.” Harry instructs, sliding his hands further up your thighs and pushing his thumbs under the side hems of your panties.

“Want you to fuck me hard with your big cock daddy.” You beg, feeling the throbbing in your clit intensify as your conversation lingers on. 

“You sure your little pussy can handle it babydoll?” Harry asks you sweetly as he softly thumbs at the damp fabric of your panties. 

“Mhm.” You readily hum.

“Just remember, M’not gonna be able to hold back.” He says one more time, wanting to make sure that you knew exactly what you were getting yourself into. “Your cunt is just so good.” Harry praises, resulting in you turning your head away from him in embarrassment. You still got a bit embarrassed and bashful whenever Harry talked about you in a more sexual manner, which is why Harry loved talking to you like this. “So are you gonna take whatever daddy gives you sweet girl?”

“Yes daddy.” You mumble meekly.

It takes Harry a little over a minuet to get you lying in the middle of your bed, the both of you naked (it was pretty easy since you both were wearing almost nothing), and beneath him. Your legs were spread wide and your head was tilted back in anticipation for his cock. 

“Ready baby?” Harry asks once more, lining himself up with your sopping wet entrance. You give him a confident and feverish nod and you begin to feel a little pressure on your entrance. You then feel an almost piercing sensation when you feel the already thick, now swollen crown of his cock pushing into your weepy hole. 

“Oh my-!” Even though he’d pushed his cock into you numerous times now, you would never get over how big he was. As he pushes into your pussy, you could feel the sting from your walls stretching to accommodate his size. You could also feel the thick veins running up his shaft digging into your spongy walls. Even though it stung, it didn’t fall short of feeling amazing.

“That’s it baby, take daddy’s cock.” Harry pants above you, feeling your perfect walls engulfing his cock. He watches with a smirk as your mouth and eyes widen at the intrusion of his large cock inside you. 

Once he’s fully inside and you can feel him pushing up against the back of your pussy, Harry gives you little to no time to adjust before he goes straight into pounding you. When he said that he wasn’t going to be able to hold back, he meant it. Harry had one hand planted on the bed to hold himself up and the other was pressed right into your lower stomach where he knew you were feeling the most pressure. He also got to feel his cock moving inside you as he fucked his cock into you. Harry couldn’t believe how well you were taking his cock. You were taking every last thrust of he gave you like a champ. He absolutely loved hearing your screams and moans for more as he continuously slams his cock into you.

When you told him that you wanted him to fuck you hard, you were expecting it to be amazing but not this amazing. You couldn’t get enough of the way he rammed his cock into you over and over again. You absolutely loved the slight sting or pain that came along with each pleasure packed thrust. Even though there was a small tinge of pain, it was greatly overshadowed by the immense pleasure he was giving you. 

“How does it feel baby.” Harry grunts through his growls and moans, bringing the hand that was once planted against your lower stomach up to your face to give your cheek a few taps. You felt so good around him that he never wanted to stop.

“Hurts a little but it feels so good. So deep” You manage to sputter out. When he hears this, a smirk rises to Harry’s face. Hearing that you were enjoying the tinge of pain that was coming from the pleasure he was giving you made him want to not only give it to you harder, but make you completely fall apart around him. As his his thrusts got sharper and farther apart, he could feel the tightness and fire from the pit of his stomach spreading throughout the rest of his body, signifying to Harry that his release was speeding towards him. And judging by the tears pooling in your eyes, the smile spread across your parted and moaning lips, and the way your walls were beginning to contract and tighten around him, your release was fast approaching as well.

The pressure of his impending release consumed Harry so much that he couldn’t hold himself up for much longer. He lowers himself down on top of you and rests against your body. Your arms immediately go around his neck and your moans become even more strained. In this position, the both of you were engulfed in each other, pushing you and Harry right to your release.

“Cum w’me baby.” Harry pants into your ear, pressing his mouth right below it. He then proceeds to send one final sharp thrust into you, catapulting you both completely over the edge. The way your release hit you this time hit you like never before. It hit you so hard that you not only came, but you also squirted all over Harry. You didn’t even notice this. You were too caught up in how good it felt to let go. Harry on the other hand immediately noticed what was going on when he felt a warm substance squirting up against his lower stomach and cock as he came. That only made everything 10x better.  He couldn’t believe that he not only made you cum hard, he also made you squirt.

Once you both rode the large and powerful waves of your releases, Harry lifts himself up from you and begins to slowly pull his cock out of your now quivering pussy. He gives you a few kisses to the lips and softly coos to you, telling you how good you did for him as he slowly pulls his cock out of you. Once he’s fully out, Harry collapses onto the bed beside you, completely exhausted from your previous activities.

After a good five minuets of heavy breathing and wrapping your heads around what just happened, Harry figures that it’s time for you guys’ routine post-sex check-in as he liked to call it. He liked hearing how good he made you feel afterwards. He had a bit of a praise kink. 

“Is that pretty little pussy sore babydoll?” Harry coos, turning onto his side to look at your limp and completely fucked out figure.

“Mhm.” You mumble shakily, still not being able to feel anything except the small and subdued soreness between your legs and along your thighs, and the feeling of his sticky cum dripping out of you onto the sheets below. 

“Good.” Harry hums delightedly, reaching his hand out to lay it flat against your lower stomach. “I love you baby.” Harry coos, bringing his head over to press a sweet kiss to your shoulder. 

“I love you too.” You breathe out to him. “Can we take a bath?” You ask him softly. After the way Harry gave it to you nice and rough, you were in need of a little aftercare and some tlc. 

“Of course angel.” Harry coos in agreement. 

Masterlist

[surveillance-0011]

TBOI Headcanons: Horsemen

Death

He/him

He’s...nice. Not a good person by any means but he’s the most polite of the bunch. Kind of strange though. Creepily calm, a bit sarcastic, and he has a pretty morbid view on the world.

Reserved and usually grumpy. He can be rather chipper off-duty, though. Putting up with the others takes a lot of energy from him.

Tired....

A bit neurotic but good at coming off as a down-to-earth guy.

He’s the most book-smart of the bunch and he’s fairly wise. A bit emotionally stunted, but he tries his best to be mature and make the right choices.

Death is more than a bit nihilistic and pessimistic. He has a hard time just... caring, mostly about himself.

Not to say he’s completely apathetic, he can be pretty empathetic but he tries not to act on that too much because if he did his job would have broken him by now.

He likes to think he’s got it all under control, but he does not. He’s more prone to pettiness and stupid decisions than he’d like to admit.

That being said he’s been pretty good with like. Growing and maturing though. He’s changed more than he realizes in just in the past.... decade or so ago. A bit of a late start for an immortal but hey at least he’s slightly less of a scumbag.

It’s usually not easy to anger him unless he’s really tired or something’s already set him off. When something does piss him off badly he’s a bit prone to freaking out. He’s not very good at handling his emotions. 

Sees his own job as a necessary evil, because hey, someone’s gotta do it.

Interested in botany/gardening, as well as literature.

Genuinely nice- or at least polite- to the kids when he’s not supposed to be murdering them. He sees no reason to go out of his way to do so, especially since unwarranted cruelty towards others has only bit him in the ass.

Famine’s older brother. The two have always had each other’s backs.

Diligent, and always considers the logistics to things instead of acting on emotion alone.

Protective of the other horsemen.

Pretty short tbh

His horse’s name is Chili.

Famine

She/he (bigender). You can use both interchangeably or only use one set, she doesn’t care. Fine with they/them too but it’s never really clicked w/ him enough to be preferred.

Usually prefers more masculine terms (brother, sir, mr...) but fine with anything.

.Flips between bouncing off the walls and having no energy whatsoever.

Impulsive, she’s got terrible judgement and has the most idiotic of ideas sometimes.

Fairly easygoing, tries to forgive and forget and doesn’t let little transgressions get to her

Actually pretty damn sad. Needs some self care but never looks after herself.

I mean she’s optimistic and usually happy but like. There’s always just a bit of sadness, you know? He’s dealt with a lot and it’s definitely taken its toll on him.

Disaster Lesbian

Tries to be a graceful loser but she can get a bit more competitive than she’d like to admit.

Has a hard time relating to others and considering how they feel, at least when it comes to anything more complex than “bad thing happened now I’m sad/mad” He’s a drifter by nature, always onto the next big thing for a quick thrill.

Eats a lot. It’s never enough.

Plants and a good deal of food will decay if she touches them, or even gets too close to them.

Like his brother he has some interest in nature. Famine is more on the adventurous side, though. She’s tried to live off the land a few times with varying success.

Named her horse Frisk

Pestilence

He/him

Calm, quiet, but also a pessimistic jackass.

Always in a bad mood. I mean, he’s permanently sick with just about everything contagious and deadly. You’d be grumpy, too!

Surprisingly high pain tolerance. A good deal of his nerves have probably just.. shut down or something. Or maybe he’s just numb to everything after a lifetime of pain.

Sleeps a lot

Dislikes his situation a lot, but doesn’t mind the company of the others.

Lazarus is terrified of this dude. The other kids are mostly grossed out or annoyed by him.

Likes to be alone.

Fairly smart, but comes off as absent minded bc he’s pretty much too sick to function. He slips up a lot and he’s pretty damn clumsy

Probably the most rational of the bunch, when he’s not in airplane mode. 

He’s also got a fairly strong moral compass. He doesn’t really like fighting the kids unlike War and Famine. Or just having to go up against people in general. Hell he hates the fact people get sick because of him. At the very least Pest has higher standards and is fairly transparent

But that isn’t to say he’s a good person. Yeah he doesn’t go out of his way to hurt others for shits and giggles and He’s Not Conquest but he doesn’t ever object to any of the shit the kids are put through and well. Yknow he still does kill them. He will also encourage some of War’s antics when it’s against someone he dislikes.

Tries to be as supportive as he can for the others. He knows he can’t do too much without overexerting so he tries to be encouraging and comforting as he can.

This compassion usually isn’t extended to humans, though.

Not very emotive, the only emotions he ever really expresses would be disdain and mild concern.

Not very fond of Conquest but they don’t hate each other. They actually work together well, too.

Friends with Mahalath. They’re pretty close!

His horse’s name is Moses.

War

He/it

He’s not very friendly, he’s pretty defensive and always on edge.

Out of all the horsemen, he’s probably the one closest with the Beast.

Lots of scars n injuries, it’s practically stitched together

One gold tooth

Impulsive, prefers solving issues through violence than through reason.

He can be fairly clever, though.

Intentionally angers/upsets others, likes causing problems and ruining things for people.

Desires wealth and power

Gets burnt out pretty quickly.

Emotional, insecure, and sensitive, and he hates this part of him. Definitely overcompensates for it.

Explosive temper, quite literally. Catches fire when upset and explodes if it’s more intense. Damage done to him also makes it happen. It’s not entirely voluntary but can be held off, and his “sobbing” sprite is him doing exactly that (but he’s probably also trying not to cry lmao). In the Ultra War fight, however...

Its daily routine leaves a lot to be desired. It wakes up, goes to work, then it goes home and just. Sits and rots.

Also, his diet is god awful. Please just eat a fruit or vegetable for once maybe you’d feel better goddamn.

He cannot remember if his horse is actually a horse or not but uhh he named her Bellum.

Conquest

He/they.

High and mighty sort of attitude. Can be very selfish. Stubborn, set in his ways. Gets defensive if you call him out or tell him he’s wrong.

Gay + nonbinary but in the closet (and denial) about both of those things. They’re trying to unlearn years’ worth of internalized bigotry.

Used to be worse, now trying to unlearn his toxic behaviors. But he’s still awful.

Doesn’t remember anything before their death. However they’ve held very strong Christian (specifically Catholic) beliefs all their life and they have a pretty black and white way of thinking.

Very cold and clinical. He has a bit of a temper but there’s a sort of calmness to everything he does even when he’s pissed.

Just as argumentative and aggressive as War but like more of a threat.

The others call him Connie sometimes, especially Death, who practically almost always calls him by this nickname.

Doesn’t harbor ill will towards Pestilence. They might have been overshadowed, but it’s not Pestilence’s own fault. If anything, being out of the spotlight has been good for Conquest, even if they do miss the attention sometimes. The only reason the two dislike each other is because their personalities clash.

Now if there’s anyone he hates that would be the Headless Horseman. Fuck that guy amiright

Very protective of Death. The two are close, Death is probably the only person who is consistently nice to him.

Utterly terrified of needles (hypodermic, not sewing needles, though he’s not good with sharp objects tbh) and medical stuff makes him anxious

Seems very... off. Just weird vibes but no one can pin point what about him is wrong.

Oh uh and his horse’s name is Josephine.

[helbertinelli]

As someone who likes a lot of the newer Star Wars content that’s been put out in the past decade, I’m wondering why a lot of people are constantly claiming that “Disney” Anakin and Padme are OOC.

I get it, Anidala is my comfort ship too and I only ever want the best for them, but the circumstances of their marriage were super unhealthy for both of them and it seems pretty obvious that it would manifest in other ways instead of just at the end of ROTS. They’re both incredibly strong willed people who believe they know what’s right, and they never really got to be together or effectively communicate with each other, and that’s super tragic.

Anakin and Padme are flawed characters, that’s something that people stress a lot, I’m just wondering why when any creator other than George tries to explore those flaws through their relationship, they’re seen as portraying them OOC. Obviously George has a lot of insight into their characters, relationship, and flaws and has revealed a lot about them through interviews, extras, etc., but I don’t think he was necessarily as good at showing it through the films (Padme especially gets a lot of her important scenes/plotlines cut and her characterization kind of suffers from that).

Idk, it might just be that I have a different perspective (I got into the fandom at around 2013 when a lot of new content was coming out) but I don’t struggle with reconciling a lot of the newer works as expanded characterizations, I don’t think that they necessarily contradict what’s present in the films most of the time.

Ultimately, it probably just comes down to how you interpret Star Wars as George Lucas’ creation, the man was very adamant that it was *his* story before he sold it, but I think multiple authorial viewpoints can exist in this massive franchise.

(Obviously people can have their own interpretations and there is no definitive “right” way to look at things, just wondering what the thought process is here)

Thanks for your ask. I’m going to break it down into the points you’ve sent just so I can keep my answer organized and not all over the place. 1. As someone who likes a lot of the newer Star Wars content that’s been put out in the past decade, I’m wondering why a lot of people are constantly claiming that “Disney” Anakin and Padme are OOC.

Because they made Anakin think that Padme would cheat on him and then they made Padme afraid of Anakin and made her tell him they need a break. And because they retconned their story in order to stuff in Clovis in Padme’s story. And it doesn’t fit in the timeline of events that have already been established for Padme and it doesn’t fit with her character at all. In AOTC, in the novel, it says specifically that Padme never made time for herself and she only cared about being a Senator. They mention it in the movie too, but in the book, they go more in depth. There’s no way she made time to have a relationship with Clovis.

Again, for Padme, they (TCW) also make her more focused on her job and they treat Anakin like he’s just some side character in her life. This is completely out of character for Padme. We saw in AOTC that Padme developed from this person who only put her job first, to a person who finally allowed herself to have feelings for someone else and who would put that person before anything else.

If this was not true, then Padme would not have ignored Mace Windu’s request to stay on Tatooine until the Jedi go and rescue Obi-Wan, she would not have married Anakin at the end of AOTC, she would not have gotten pregnant with him, she would not have lived with him on Coruscant, she would not have made plans (and been happy about those plans) to leave her job and move to Naboo and raise their child(ren) there, she would not have went after Anakin after he turned to the dark side and asked him to go away with her.

TCW ignored that Padme got significant development in AOTC and that because of that development her character from TPM and the beginning of AOTC was now changed. They ignored that and decided to portray Padme as we see her at the beginning of AOTC. Spending time with Anakin is a chore, it doesn’t matter what Anakin says even if his concerns are right, only the Republic and her job matter.

There are moments in TCW where their relationship is good, but there are really bad and out of character moments that overshadow the good stuff.

2. I get it, Anidala is my comfort ship too and I only ever want the best for them, but the circumstances of their marriage were super unhealthy for both of them and it seems pretty obvious that it would manifest in other ways instead of just at the end of ROTS. They’re both incredibly strong willed people who believe they know what’s right, and they never really got to be together or effectively communicate with each other, and that’s super tragic.

I don’t think their marriage or the circumstances of their marriage were unhealthy. Their relationship is one of the best ones in Star Wars since it’s very mutual and it’s based on respect and understanding. Padme and Anakin know each other very well and they understand the other like no one else. They’re also nothing but respectful and loving of one another. I don’t see how that is unhealthy.

Them having to hide their marriage and not being able to spend time with one another too because of the war does have an effect on Anakin and Padme, but not on their relationship. Neither of them would think that it would be better not to have a relationship than to have a secret one. I know that Padme said this in AOTC, but she changes her mind about that fairly quick. Again, going to the AOTC book, we actually see Padme doubting her words in that very scene and she’s thinking they’d end up be destroyed worse by not allowing themselves to be together.

3. Anakin and Padme are flawed characters, that’s something that people stress a lot, I’m just wondering why when any creator other than George tries to explore those flaws through their relationship, they’re seen as portraying them OOC. Obviously George has a lot of insight into their characters, relationship, and flaws and has revealed a lot about them through interviews, extras, etc., but I don’t think he was necessarily as good at showing it through the films (Padme especially gets a lot of her important scenes/plotlines cut and her characterization kind of suffers from that). 

George Lucas did not have a lot of time to show Anakin and Padme’s relationship in the movies. And yes, Padme did get a lot of her scenes cut out. I don’t think her characterization suffered from it, because we, as the audience, could still understand what Padme stood for and what was important for her. Sure more detail would have been nice, but I don’t think that her characterization was lacking in any way. Like in AOTC it would have been nice to see more scenes of her that showed her being in love with Anakin, but there were still other scenes left in the movie that showed this very well.

I don’t think that only George Lucas is able to explore the flaws in their relationship and their characters. I think I’ve seen some fragments from some SW books on here that have Anidala scenes and Anakin and Padme do have some conflict, but they resolve it. Like there was one where Padme had to go on a mission that Anakin didn’t approve with and they basically talked it out and reached kind of a compromise I think. And there was another book where Anakin and Padme wanted to make out and have sex, but Bail and Obi-Wan were close by and despite how much they both wanted each other and how much it hurt them not to be together, they agreed it was better this way.

The problem is when people create conflict in their relationship that would not make sense in the first place, and then try to say that because of that conflict they just created, Anakin and Padme’s relationship is bad. Like as I discussed above with TCW and making Anakin think that his wife would cheat on him. That would never happen. I think it was in the ROTS book where Palpatine is trying to convince Anakin that Padme is having an affair with Obi-Wan and Anakin is like “Nope, I know Padme.“

It makes no sense to change Anakin’s character to now believe that his wife is cheating just to create drama in their relationship. The TCW writers tried to push a weird love triangle on a happily married couple and then they tried to make Anakin seem like the bad guy for not liking Clovis forcing himself on Padme and for trying to get her killed before that. They created a conflict that would never happen in their relationship normally and then they were like “Oh look Anidala is toxic!“

4. Idk, it might just be that I have a different perspective (I got into the fandom at around 2013 when a lot of new content was coming out) but I don’t struggle with reconciling a lot of the newer works as expanded characterizations, I don’t think that they necessarily contradict what’s present in the films most of the time.

Ultimately, it probably just comes down to how you interpret Star Wars as George Lucas’ creation, the man was very adamant that it was *his* story before he sold it, but I think multiple authorial viewpoints can exist in this massive franchise.

(Obviously people can have their own interpretations and there is no definitive “right” way to look at things, just wondering what the thought process is here)

I can’t speak for your perspective, but it’s fairly easy to see that TCW is not really expanded characterization in the case of Padme and Anidala, specifically, but it actually contradicts things that were already established in canon. In order to achieve TCW!Padme they had to go back on Padme’s characterization in AOTC and completely ignore her character from ROTS. I know TCW takes place between AOTC and ROTS, but in the timeline, Padme would already have been married to Anakin for some time, so a lot of her characterization from ROTS would have to be incorporated in TCW!Padme. But they didn’t. TCW!Padme is basically TPM + beginning of AOTC Padme but done badly. TCW!Anidala is very contradictory with Anidala in the movies. Not only do Anakin and Padme mistrust one another and doubt each other, but the timeline has been modified to squeeze in Clovis.

We see a bit of conflict in the movies, when Padme tells Anakin that maybe the Republic is wrong and yes, it never goes anywhere, but at least it is realistic conflict. It’s not “Hey here’s my secret boyfriend that I never told you about even though we are married and I’m gonna spend time with him even though he got me poisoned one time and then my handmaiden got killed by his stupid plot and I almost endangered the Republic by helping him out and if you don’t like that he’s forcing himself onto me, then I guess our marriage is broken and we can’t be together for a while.“ That is completely against their relationship based on both of them being loving and honest and respectful to each other.

The movies made it clear that despite everything that was going on in both of their lives, Anakin and Padme found comfort in one another. They were open and honest and loving to each other (up until the point of Anakin turning to the dark side). TCW ignored all of that and pushed their own interpretation onto Anidala. Anidala was meant to be a fairytale romance that was basically the two of them against all odds and they brought the best in each other. Their characters were extremely connected that it was weird to have Padme without Anakin or Anakin without Padme. They were both extremely committed to each other, they were both ride or die for one another. And we saw it in the movies very well. Anakin destroys everything to be with Padme and Padme is willing to leave everything behind to be with him despite all the horrible things he has done. She dies still believing there’s good in him. And then TCW comes in and tries to make Anidala in some cheap TV sitcom romance where all they do is bicker and get jealous and Padme acts like it’s such a chore being Anakin’s wife. They westernize their relationship in the worst kind of way.

There’s no way to not find it contradictory that Padme in the movies who, dies from a broken heart and her last words are that there’s still good in Anakin, despite everything he did to the galaxy and to her personally, would be the same as TCW!Padme, who gets angry and scared of her husband beating up the guy who tried to sexually assualt her and then tells her husband that their marriage isn’t a marriage and that they need to take a break. It makes no sense at all.

I’m all for conflict between Padme and Anakin, but it needs to be realistic conflict. It can’t be what TCW tried to push on them or the silly theories of Padme hating Anakin for turning to the darkside (when she tried to get him to run away with her and even before in AOTC she consoled him after attacking the Tusken) or her trying to kill him at any point (when she dies believing there’s still good in him). That’s like saying that Luke would try to kill his nephew and then run away and hide on a remote planet, abandoning his family. It contradicts what has already been established about him.

Also, when you write something like TCW where you’re basically adding stuff to the middle of something, you’re basically required to know the source material of what came before and what came after the thing you are writing and you need to make your story fit and respect what came before and what came after. Otherwise, you just end up writing TCW!Padme and TCW!Anidala where it contradicts already established canon. If I never watched SW and I would just now start watching it for the first time and I’d watch: TPM, AOTC, TCW, ROTS, SWR, RO, ANH, ESB, and ROTJ, it would make no sense to me how Padme who told Anakin that their marriage isn’t a marriage, would distrust Obi-Wan when he told her of the attack and it would make no sense that she would go to talk to Anakin when TCW showed us how easy it is for her to just dump him.

This goes for TCW and for fan theories where Padme hates Anakin or she tries to kill him, I can’t reconcile those with the actual canon because then that character isn’t Padme anymore, and the ship isn’t Anidala anymore. It goes against the core of the ship, of what makes Anidala Anidala. They’re together because they’re so in love with each other and both of them will die being in love with each other. If you have them break up or end up hating each other, then you’re no longer writing about Anidala, that’s a different pairing entirely. With AUs and headcanons and fics and even other canon material, you have to be careful how you alter something so that the essence of a character or a pairing does not get lost. If it does, then you end up writing about different characters and different relationships. I’ll again use Luke as an example. Luke was willing to die for his family, to get his father, whom he didn’t even know beforehand, back, he even left his training because his family needed him. If you write Luke as being the person who wanted to kill a member of his family at the first sign of darkness, who then abandoned his family, and ignored all calls for him to come back, then you just lost the essence of Luke who was all about unconditional love and family, and you now have a different character altogether.

[cherry-interlude]

Lana Del Rey Unreleased Ranking (5)

This is a re-ranking of Lana's unreleased songs, after making a first a few years ago. This is all my opinion, which I don't mind anyone disagreeing with but don't come for me for it - honestly, I like every song, despite any criticism, and this ranking is very vague. It's based on objective and subjective opinion.

This is the fifth of five posts, with my favourites.

Wild One

Lana is nostalgic without the sadness, remembering how she’d shake it for Mike but is embracing her freedom. She lets country influence seep through her voice and her uncomplicated instrumentals – it would be an unsurprising addition to Chemtrails

True Love On The Side

Though simple in structure and lyrics, it’s more Lana’s grittier rock sound and her incredible vocals that make this one of my favourite unreleased tracks. Lana lets herself go and goes full pop rock chick for this track, whilst keeping in with her ‘other woman’ trope that makes the song still familiar despite its departure from her usual music.

Driving In Cars With Boys

Dripping in nostalgia, Driving In Cars With Boys makes you yearn for the kind of 1950s/1960s era Lana often laments over. Lana is a bad girl just having fun, doing what she pleases and giving in to her vices, and it’s this kind of song that is relatable in its escapism and desire to just do what you please. There are two versions, one with a more monotone chorus that matches the rest of the verses and another where Lana sings in a higher register, letting her cheerful, breezy love for driving with the boys shine through in her vocals.

Angels Forever Forever Angels

Perfect for Paradise, Angels Forever Forever Angels has that slow, rhythmic summer drive feel, a relaxed version of Ride which also has associations with the bikers that feature in both the music video for Ride and the lyrics to this unreleased song. It’s dreamy but grounded by Lana’s patriotic love for the grungier side of Americana.

Hollywood

It has a breathy chorus you could sing to, the feeling of a summer evening and blue skies. The ever building and dropping beat that keeps the song ticking as restlessly as Lana’s hopes and dreams gets me feeling pumped as much as her emphasised, dragged out “Hollywood” in the chorus makes me soothed. Lana is wishing for fame and fortune but it has the feel of an eighties American teen movie, iconic and deserving of a cult following.

Yes To Heaven

Hazy like a daydream, Yes To Heaven is made of sunlight and soft grass, closer to nature than the spotlights of Lana’s often alcohol-soaked, money drenched stages. Lana’s voice is tentative until it shimmers in the chorus, and though it was made for Ultraviolence, it wouldn’t be out of place on the shining beacon of hope that is Lana’s positive turn, Lust For Life.

Life Is Beautiful

This gorgeous song was intended for Age of Adaline’s trailer, and it’s been years of waiting for the full song to be released. Now we have it, it’s certainly worth the wait. Dreamy and soft, this track is a timeless classic that could underwhelm from it’s gentle feel but works perfectly well as a pure little love song.

On Our Way

Stripped back and with a country twang, Lana doesn’t add fuss and frills to this song, instead just crooning precisely how she feels in the kind of song that keeps you daydreaming for hours. Not even the smattering of her favourite imagery (Chevrolets and K-Mart lip gloss) overshadows the love that’s at the forefront of this track.

Never Let Me Go

Like On Our Way, Never Let Me Go has the country twang and stripped back feel that makes this a more subdued song, her lyrics shining even more. Lana’s additional strings layer this song well and her comparisons to the dangerous couple that is Sid and Nancy gives this track an edge, keeping it from being too frothy.

French Restaurant

A piano ballad, Lana strips back the hurt of Without You and dual dedication of Video Games to sing about how fame matters so little to her while she’s torn between two men. Her voice is beautiful and it does well to be so minimal in its production, her emotion driving the song clearly enough. Especially pretty are the backing vocals of the choruses, echoes of her thoughts that hammer home her broken feelings.

Trash Magic

Lana’s delicate and soft vocals help tie into the Lolita-esque character Lana often plays in her music. It has a similar feel to 1949, dripping with her delicious imagery, and wouldn’t be out of place on AKA Lizzy Grant. Lana is the fragile ‘daddy’s girl’ again in this song, and the sharp yet soothing music in the background sets the tone for a quiet trailer park night.

Us Against The World

Though fairly chilled out, Lana still hooks listeners with her characterisation of waitress by day/stripper by night, a dangerous girl tempting an equally dangerous guy. Lana drips sexiness in this song and though it’s not as exciting as some of her other unreleased pop hits, it is perfect for the Del Rey character.

Your Girl

Much like Caught You Boy, Lana is desperate for a man she can’t have but is instead a complete wreck. Lana just repeats over and over how she wishes she was this man’s girl, practically pleading after describing how she needs to be led off the stage from falling apart. Yet it’s still sultry, still passionate, and is topped off by her honey-like vocal demonstration in the bridge and the chorus.

Roses

Lana is the other woman with a twist – instead of moping about her man (Other Woman, Sad Girl) she is taking action. Fighting against him, not letting him go without making some noise and getting rid of his girlfriend, Lana storms into the song with a vengeful wrath and calls him out for his poor attempts at apologies. When this song first came out, I adored it, since it was the exact kind of strong-girl track I wanted from her with a great hook and all the right Lana-isms. Now, I still get that thrill listening to this song and its kick-ass fuck-you to the man she loves.

Playing Dangerous

The churning drums, the spoken verses and the coy vocals set this song apart from her others. It falls shorter during the choruses, the verses being the best parts of the track, but the way Lana interacts with the listener ultimately and is a more direct character of ‘innocent’ seductress who might actually be downright bad (arson is hinted).

Serene Queen

Lana is unbothered and unruffled, as collected as she is in Put Your Lips Together but this time with a definite Ultraviolence/Honeymoon feel. Lana is unshaken by the blazing guns, instead completely calm with her dangerous lover, questioning why he even has a problem in the first place. As it picks up in the chorus, almost smirking, it becomes one of her finer unreleased songs yet.

Ave Maria

This is just an instrumental but there’s something so beautifully haunting about it. It wouldn’t be out of place in a Hollywood movie, with shades of the Lolita soundtrack instantly coming to mind when it first starts. It even works well without singing, and I hope we get a full version soon.

Puppy Love

From the perspective of a Marilyn Monroe figure, Lana plays the teenage girl wishing for a traditional romance with her lover. It’s ever-so-adorable, harking back to the sweeter parts of the fifties, but there’s a sense of sadness throughout it. Under the surface of the puppy love is the reality that the references to Monroe do not forget her sadness, loneliness and ultimately her overdose. The tone shifts to such an unhappiness in the bridge, directly calling back to Monroe’s phone call shortly before she overdosed, twisting the song to something more melancholic.

Cherry Blossom

The lullaby that grew into the marvellous, completed Cherry Blossom is a lovely tribute to someone small and beloved. Though Lana doesn’t have children yet, the care in her voice and each of her heart-warming compliments and promises is still thoroughly enjoyable – and comforting.

Colour Blue

In a song that reminds me of the love/hate relationship of Norman Fucking Rockwell, Lana takes her time to question why she loves the men that she does and, ultimately, grow from it, beginning to want something different. It’s raw and personal, with a gushing chorus that is complimented fully by the guitar. This song is blue all over, from Lana's opening harmonisation to her abrupt, unhappy ending.

Paradise

This song is, of course, pure paradise. A summery beat, a flippant Lana simply enjoying her lover no matter how long she’ll have him for and her coos of “sick!” and “that’s dope!” make this into a tasty distraction fit for the sunny months. Her casualness in this track is fresh as well as the dance-happy music that she doesn’t often create in her albums.

Meet Me In The Pale Moonlight

Lana is the waitress with a crush in this bop of a track, trying to convince a guy to get with her instead of that “bitch”. Convincing she is, as she uses all of her charm, wit and insistence that there’s no promises behind her intentions to have a good time with him. It’s just a breath of fresh air compared to a lot of her music, not too heavy and perfectly polished. It’s self-assured as much as it is breezy, and calm as it is it’s still a riot to listen to.

Caught You Boy

A dream-esque confession of desire, obsession and pure, crazy love, Lana isn’t outright insane in this track (Kinda Outta Luck, Jealous Girl, Serial Killer) but she hints towards being slightly too attached to her beau and describing herself as an army of one. The song is sweet and flowery but there’s a sadness and danger to it that keeps it from being too sugary.

Fine China

Some of Lana’s best lyrics are in Fine China as she sings of her fractured relationship, unhappy wedding and many beautiful yet easily broken things. It’s a slow, unfussy ballad but her strong voice and stunning lyrics make it so much more than a throwaway unreleased song.

Thunder

What feels like a coming-of-age slow dance song but is ultimately a choir-backed break-up track. Lana’s lyrics are clever and her voice is the perfect complement to The Last Shadow Puppets, this combined work a sure hit that deserves some kind of release and recognition. Lana is frustrated but tender as she leads the song with plenty of presence.

Prom Song Gone Wrong

The fifties feel, the teenage romance, the warm and gorgeous vocals that switch from dreamily longing to a cheeky talk-rap suggest this is a song tied tightly to Puppy Love, except with a more hopeful feel to it. Lana is ready to leave and she wants her lover to come with her, and even if it’s a youthful mistake there’s no mistaking that the love she – and her man – feels is real. It’s a pretty dedication to the kind of head-spinning romance of younger years, though it has an edge to it. Lana’s choruses are desperate, her pleading genuine and the strange way the music builds and collapses right at the end give the illusion all isn’t the sunshine and rainbows Lana sings of – and hopes for.

[mooncaps]

The parallels between Catra and Glimmer keep sticking in my mind. They don't quite mirror each other exactly, visually or thematically, but there's a lot of overlap. They're similar in so many ways, but the inverse of each other in certain ways as well. Their natures are so alike that if their circumstances had been swapped, they'd probably just become each other.

So, I guess I’m picking up my shovel and digging into this. I wanna examine the ways they’re alike, the key ways they differ, what shapes each of them, and why their intersecting journeys are significant. There’s a lot to unpack and this is gonna be a long post, but if the subject matter sounds interesting to you, then read on.

Their parallels are most evident in Season 4, but are also woven throughout the show. I'm thinking back to 1x07 when Adora explains to Bow and Glimmer what being raised by Shadow Weaver was like and Glimmer, without missing a beat, says: "Okay, sure, Mom stuff." Completely nonchalant, with a casual shrug, as if nothing sounded out of place. All of these characters are impacted by being embattled in a militaristic conflict, of course, but Catra and Glimmer are both getting particular parental experiences from their mother-figures, the only parent in either of their lives. Notably, they don't have the same experience. Angella's a much better mother to Glimmer than Shadow Weaver is to Catra. Shadow Weaver is abusive, manipulative, power-hungry, and especially cruel to Catra above all others. Even when Angella is harsh, she's constructive and supportive.

But both of these children end up with a strong desire to prove themselves on the battlefield. Both want their mothers to be proud of them, to recognize them as worthy. Catra spends the early part of her life suppressing the urge to prove herself, pretending not to care about it while secretly being deeply upset when she finds herself overshadowed by Adora. Glimmer, on the other hand, openly thirsts for opportunities to be a great commander and earn recognition for her accomplishments. They both have somewhat of an inferiority complex as well. Catra comes to decide she doesn't want to be the sidekick. Glimmer is insecure about being the princess who has to recharge.

In 1x08, Glimmer's jealousy toward Bow and Perfuma is essentially a microcosm of a key dimension of Catra's arc for the show. But Glimmer is much quicker to learn the lessons and grow. Due to her experiences, Catra's walls are much harder to break down. I'll swing back around to that point later.

As Season 1 draws to its close, Glimmer and Catra both gain a little more independence, though they do it in very different ways. Catra does what Glimmer wanted to do at the beginning of Season 1. She presents valuable tech and a valuable ally to her commanding officer. Glimmer gets closer to her mother and they both start to understand each other better. Catra defeats her mother-figure in combat. Glimmer and Catra both gain favor in their respective armies and get the much-desired chance to prove themselves in the Battle of Bright Moon.

In 2x02, Glimmer and Bow take Catra hostage and the ways in which these two characters differ are really highlighted. Glimmer is tempted more than once to be as ruthless with Catra as Catra would be with her, but Bow talks her down when push comes to shove. "We're not them." Catra doesn't have a person in her life who talks her down. Not anymore. Catra sees the reliance on friendship among the Rebellion as a weakness. "It's why you're never going to win."

With the environment she grew up in, Catra's understanding of concepts like friendship and love are primarily in relation to power and manipulation. She's quick to seize upon the closeness between Glimmer and Bow as a way to force Glimmer to use up her magic. Catra's own love for Adora is, in the early days, selfish. She doesn't want to share Adora, whether with friends in the Horde or friends in the Rebellion. And it's why she believes that Adora doesn't feel the same way. If Adora wouldn’t take things to the same selfish extremes, then she must not feel what Catra’s feeling. This is what Catra believes because her experiences have given her this very specific, and flawed, understanding of love.

Glimmer's relationship to love is different. She comes from a more supportive environment and even in the rare instance when she does trend toward selfish love, she's more able to accept and understand the flaws of it.

But focusing on 2x02: Glimmer and Catra push each other's buttons. Each of them instinctively knows how to hurt the other one, though Catra is more willing to inflict that hurt. They’re both paying attention and learning each other’s vulnerabilities. The one moment where Glimmer touches a nerve with Catra is: "How did Adora take years of this? She didn't run away from the Horde. She ran away from you." And Catra immediately pushes back: "You think she's not going to leave you behind too, Sparkles?"

It's somewhat telling that Catra sees Glimmer as having taken her place in Adora's life. Again, similar, but not the same. The relationship between Adora and Glimmer is different to the relationship between Adora and Catra, but Catra, with her limited and warped understanding of love, can't tell the difference anymore than she could when Adora first befriended Lonnie. Catra sees Glimmer as having the same place in Adora's life that Catra used to have. And as much as Catra wants, at this point, to tell herself she's over Adora, she's still angry.

So we’re kind of flipping between parallels and inversions, but a key factor starts to become clear at this point. What Catra and Glimmer hate in each other is what they fear in themselves. Glimmer hates that Catra took her as a hostage, but she's also frustrated that she can't be just as cruel when she has Catra as a hostage. She wants to be cruel, and yet she hates herself for wanting it. Catra hates seeing Glimmer step into the role of Adora's sidekick and she mocks the Rebellion for "the power of friendship" because she hates how vulnerable she felt after opening her heart to Adora. She wants a loving relationship, and yet she hates herself for wanting it. Catra and Glimmer see their own perceived flaws, weaknesses, and shortcomings in each other, which is why there's so much friction between them. It's really an interesting concept that develops further as the show goes on.

The next minor point of interest is 2x04. Glimmer sees the primary conflict as being between herself and Catra. It’s not much, just a little look into how Glimmer is thinking about things.

Seasons 2 and 3 are paired together in terms of themes in a way that other seasons aren’t. At the end of Season 2, or midway through the story threads, Catra loses her mother-figure. At the end of Season 3, Glimmer loses her mother. Once again, the circumstances differ. Angella is truly gone, but Shadow Weaver has simply switched sides. Glimmer’s arc going forward is very much driven by Angella’s absence, whereas Catra’s arc is driven by Shadow Weaver’s presence...as an enemy combatant.

And Shadow Weaver doesn’t just join the Rebellion, she starts working her way into Glimmer’s life. Her opening pitch that gets Glimmer to free her plays on a familial connection - the fact that she taught Glimmer’s father. They go to the Fright Zone together and of course they run into Catra, who discovers Shadow Weaver quite literally taking Glimmer by the hand.

All of this sets the stage for Season 4, where the Catra and Glimmer parallels are at their strongest. The two of them become much more similar to each other in this season. Glimmer is now receiving guidance and familial connection from the very person who shaped Catra into the person she is.

Both Catra and Glimmer effectively take control of their respective armies. Glimmer literally becomes queen and, in the very same episode, Catra seats herself on Hordak’s throne. Glimmer is reluctant to take the throne, Catra is eager to. At the end of the episode Catra says to Hordak, “I think you and I are going to do great things together.” This line echoes what Shadow Weaver said to young Micah and baby Adora. And of course Glimmer is also stepping into her mother’s role.

From there, the two of them find themselves on similar paths. In 4x02 they both have the same idea to recover Mara’s ship. In 4x04 Glimmer wants to think like Catra and asks Shadow Weaver to teach her. Glimmer ends up in a fight with Catra and Catra marvels at Glimmer’s tactical decision to use Adora as a decoy. Where Glimmer was previously unwilling to be like Catra, now she’s determined to do anything for victory. And of course the idea to use Adora as a distraction came from Shadow Weaver and Catra’s recognizing this change in Glimmer’s tactics without quite realizing why it should feel familiar.

Some things happen at different times for these two, but there’s so much overlap. Glimmer starts the season dealing with boring meetings and itching to be out in the field, jealous of her friends. For Catra, she starts the season in the field, but as her plans advance she finds herself stuck in the Fright Zone while Hordak does the field work.

Both of them are focused on success, no matter the cost. They both become so stubbornly obsessed with winning the war that it fractures their friendships. They reject all counsel and push away the people who care for them. In spite of being hurt by losing the trust of their friends, they both double down on trying to win, expecting total victory to be the thing that brings them peace of mind, the thing that makes everything worth the cost.

There’s a push and pull between the two of them throughout the season. Neither can succeed in their chosen path without destroying the other. And yet they can’t seem to destroy each other without losing themselves. Metaphorically, destroying each other would mean destroying their own shortcomings, and both of them want those weaknesses and doubts erased, but neither of them can manage to strike the final blow.

Catra gains the upper hand in the war by having Double Trouble work the cracks in Glimmer’s friendships. Glimmer gains the upper hand by having Double Trouble drive a decisive wedge between Catra and Hordak. Double Trouble’s duplicitous allegiances and feigning of friendships are key developments on both sides of the battlefield and their services are weaponized by both Catra and Glimmer to target each other. Double Trouble essentially acts as a messenger, sent from both of these two characters to tear the other one down. Catra and Glimmer personify to each other what they fear in themselves and Double Trouble gives voice to the doubts of both characters, acting on behalf of each of them in turn.

Double Trouble gets to Glimmer by suggesting that Adora is undermining the queen’s authority. They work from an understanding of Glimmer’s genuine desire to be a great queen. However, and this is a key point, when Double Trouble confronts Catra, the tactic is completely flipped. “You try so hard to play the big bad villain, but your heart’s never been in it, has it?” They work from the understanding that Catra’s apparent desire to lead the Horde to victory is not genuine. As opposed to Glimmer, whose heart has always been in it; her heart’s so in it that she becomes blind to the risks of her plans.

Part of Double Trouble’s speech to Catra can apply to Glimmer’s insecurities as well. “They didn’t believe in you, didn’t trust you, didn’t need you, left you. But did you ever stop to think, maybe they’re not the problem? It’s you. You drive them away, Wildcat.” Obviously it applies to Catra, but it also describes what Glimmer has just been through with Bow and Adora. Glimmer and Catra have so many overlapping fears and this messenger sent by Glimmer to throw Catra off balance ends up making this statement that labels Glimmer’s recent mistakes just as accurately as it does Catra’s.

The key difference between the two of them comes down to their hearts being in it. For all the similarities between Catra and Glimmer in Season 4, this climactic moment emphasizes that, for Catra, a lot of it is an affectation, a costume.

Which brings me to an element of the visual storytelling. I recently read an interesting post about the thematic significance of Catra’s mask. I also made my own post about the change to her hair in Season 4. The visual storytelling has many facets in this show. This post is about parallels though, so what I’m focusing on now is the fact that Catra and Glimmer both change their costumes in Season 4. The first scene of 4x01 features the reveal of Glimmer’s new look and the last scene of 4x01 features the reveal of Catra’s.

One of the first things I noticed about Catra’s outfit is that her new black sleeve and shoulder armor are covering the area that was damaged in the portal reality. At a guess, I’d say she wants to guard against feeling whatever that felt like again. Again though, my focus is on parallels. Let’s have a look at their outfits side by side.

Glimmer’s is essentially an evolution. She’s growing more into herself. She now has both shoulders covered. Hard to say if these shoulder pads are decorative or could serve a protective function. They kind of look metallic. Her legs are newly covered; her neck and chest are newly exposed. There are a few changes to Glimmer’s outfit, but not a lot that’s truly new to her.

For Catra, there are a few new elements in her outfit. The single sleeve, the fingerless gloves, and at the shoulders she seems to have upgraded from fabric to something that looks more like it could be armor. Her legs are more covered than they were in her previous outfit, but there are still small exposed gaps. Her feet were never covered before, but now there’s a partial covering. And there’s also what fandom has dubbed the “boob window,” though this show isn’t one that gives focus to things like cleavage. The new elements for Catra bring her outfit a little bit closer to Glimmer’s.

I’ll be interpreting exposed skin as representing vulnerabilities. Of particular interest to me is the fact that they both wear single sleeves now, one white, one black, and they cover opposite arms. Glimmer has no mask on her face; Catra has no cape covering her back. Glimmer’s boots seem especially enforced at the heel and toe. Catra’s heels and toes are exposed. You know how I’ve been saying that they see their own shortcomings in each other? Now Catra is visibly vulnerable where Glimmer is guarded and vice-versa. The particular asymmetry of the sleeves brings to mind ideas of imbalance, both internally and between them.

Catra’s sleeve looks durable; Glimmer’s sleeve looks decorative. Glimmer’s sleeve leaves a gap of skin exposed below the shoulder pad; Catra’s sleeve covers the full length of her arm. On Glimmer’s unsleeved arm, the glove barely covers her hand; Catra’s glove covers a portion of her forearm. Remember 1x08, that point I said I’d come back to? Glimmer’s quicker to learn the lessons. Catra’s walls are harder to break down. Now it’s visually represented in their outfits.

I’ll reference the visuals as I go on, but let’s get back to thematic analysis. As the Season 4 finale draws to a close, Catra and Glimmer end up together and both have been brought low. Double Trouble has just seen through all of Catra’s walls and read her for absolute filth. Glimmer has to reckon with the fact that her own hubris nearly got everyone she’s been fighting for destroyed. Both have come closer to total victory and closer to total defeat than they’ve ever been. Coming off a string of mistakes and pushing away the people who care about them, they end up together.

Glimmer has the chance to attack a willingly defenseless Catra, but spares her. Moments later, Glimmer is threatened by Horde Prime, but Catra’s intervention saves her. It’s a layered action from Catra, certainly not altruistic, but it saves Glimmer nonetheless. I think something in each of them feels hesitant to see this person, in whom they see their own flaws reflected back at them, destroyed.

And now they’re stuck with each other, quite literally cut off from everyone else. They’re each wrestling with the weight of their own failures and shortcomings, so of course they’re both trapped with the metaphorical representation of everything they never wanted to face in themselves.

They’re together, and yet they’re separated. A barrier stands between them. Catra is at liberty to move about the ship, but there’s nowhere to go and no escaping the watchful gaze of Horde Prime. She’s frustrated by this illusory liberty: “If I’m a prisoner, you might as well make it official.” Glimmer, on the other hand, is in a cell and she wants out, even though there’s nowhere to go. For a brief moment, the barrier is taken down when Catra and Glimmer are invited to dine with Horde Prime. One very effective way to bring people together is to give them a common enemy. They’re only physically together when they’re united in defending themselves against him.

Horde Prime understands the similarities between the two of them and breaks through both of their walls at the same time with the same tactic. “You Etherians are all alike. Such strong connections to one another. It’s what makes you weak.” It’s the unguarded vulnerabilities in Glimmer that poke holes in Catra’s plan of “parsing out information like a bargaining chip.” Though Catra and Glimmer have a common enemy now, they’re not yet coordinated and working with each other.

So we return now to the scene from 5x03 at the top of this post. Even the way it’s framed is significant. The scene could presumably have been presented from the other side, but seeing it from this angle allows me to infer some things about what’s being communicated.

They start out facing each other and we see their sleeved arms. Neither is quite ready to trust the other, so their walls are up. When they stand face-to-face with what they fear in themselves, they put their guards up. They’re both more-or-less equally guarded and equally vulnerable, but the guarded side is what the show’s creators are showing the audience, as well as what Catra and Glimmer are showing to each other in this moment.

The scenery around the two of them shows a stark contrast. Glimmer’s cell is brightly lit with simple architecture. Much of the space around Catra is dark and complicated.

As they open up to each other emotionally, they turn back-to-back and we’re shown their unsleeved arms. When they look away from what they fear in themselves, they let their guards down. Both of them lay a hand on their unsleeved arms, almost as if they’re subconsciously worried that they might need their walls at any moment to defend these vulnerabilities.

Their body language relaxes, though only fractionally in Catra’s case. Glimmer is a little more at ease, but Catra won’t let herself be quite as open and unguarded. Her fingers remain on that unsleeved arm, alert and ready to defend at a moment’s notice.

I’ve talked a bit about walls and defensiveness, but the way these two came to construct their walls is also important. Glimmer and Catra have both experienced hardships in their lives. Both of them grew up with only one close friend. They both felt pressure and a desire to prove themselves and they’ve both endured great tragedy in their young lives. Glimmer has developed more of the emotional tools to work through her pain and begin to heal. Catra is only at the beginning of the healing process and her pain comes from a very different source.

Glimmer spent the majority of her young life believing her father had been killed and then she lost her mother as well. Catra was either given up or orphaned and then taken in by an abusive family. Both experiences were surely traumatic. Catra’s walls are tougher for a reason though. A few reasons. The primary reason is that the source of her fear and pain was also her mother-figure.

Being traumatized by someone who should be on your side is different than other sources of trauma. And because Shadow Weaver is her parent, Catra also bonds with her and wants her approval. This is emotionally confusing and compounds Catra’s issues. Wanting love from Shadow Weaver is one of the reasons Catra hates herself for wanting love at all.

Not only is Catra traumatized by her parent, she also lacks any other parental guidance to help her process her trauma. Glimmer, even after losing her father, still had her mother. It’s after losing her mother that Glimmer really starts to lose balance emotionally. Though Catra had Adora, that kind of comfort is not the same as having the calming influence of a supportive parent to help a child cope with their trauma and assure the child that things will be okay. Further to that are the wedges that Shadow Weaver (and later Light Hope) employed to ensure that Catra and Adora would doubt each other. Then finally, Adora left the Horde and whatever comfort Catra had received from her turned poisonous. This was the thing that threw Catra’s sense of safety into chaos and unraveled any semblance of emotional balance. For much of the show, wanting love from Adora is one of the reasons Catra hates herself for wanting love at all.

This is all a roundabout way of explaining why Catra’s walls are so much thicker than Glimmer’s and why everything around her is dark and complicated. Glimmer has her own walls and coping mechanisms, but they’re constructed differently. Catra is largely driven by defensive panic responses. Glimmer is reactive and even reckless at times, especially after losing Angella, but she’s generally more able to slow down and sort through her feelings. Glimmer’s walls are constructed in such a way that they don’t impede her ability to grow and heal. Glimmer’s walls don’t keep as many things away, but her capacity to let the right people in is the trait that serves her best. The contrast between these two characters speaks volumes.

Season 5 is where Catra and Glimmer begin to learn from each other. They get past the initial reaction of simply being disgusted by seeing what they fear in themselves. They both make some appeals to each other for information and help. The barrier between them comes down again and Catra enters Glimmer’s space.

The audience is shown both sleeved arms. Walls are up. Catra uses both hands and takes Glimmer by the sleeved arm. The cake is in her unsleeved hand; it was an appeal to her vulnerable side. The full appeal from Catra that acknowledges Glimmer’s walls is the one that actually reaches her and gets Catra the information she wanted. It’s an appeal so strong that it can reach Glimmer through her walls, not just some simple ploy to prey on her softer side.

“You can’t tell him.” Glimmer uses both hands and takes Catra by the unsleeved arm. This is an appeal to Catra’s vulnerable side. And it echoes something that has previously frustrated Catra. “It’s always the same with you, Adora. I have to do this. Oh-oh, we have to do that.” This appeal to her softer side isn’t enough.

“Do one good thing in your life.” Glimmer uses both hands and takes Catra by the sleeved arm. The audience is shown both of their unsleeved arms. They’re both vulnerable here. It’s this appeal, which acknowledges Catra’s walls, that reaches her. Catra still reacts in fear, a response pattern that runs deep with her, but the message reaches her through her walls.

After processing some of her emotions, Catra returns, offering Glimmer her unsleeved arm. This is a vulnerable action from Catra.

Glimmer takes Catra’s hand with her sleeved arm.

This is the turning point. They represent each other’s insecurities, each vulnerable where the other defends. Glimmer has the tools to balance out Catra’s vulnerabilities. Glimmer’s sleeved arm meeting Catra’s unsleeved arm is like saying: “I’ve got your back.” If they’re confrontational to each other, or if they ignore each other, they’re both equally defended and equally vulnerable. But if they stand side by side...

...they can compensate for each other’s vulnerabilities. They embrace and understand the insecurities they were afraid of and together they have the tools to present a balanced front that can protect them both. Neither one of them was going to be able to succeed alone, but together they can accomplish more.

Catra knew where the teleporter was and could have escaped on her own, but that would not be success. As Glimmer pointed out, even if Catra runs away it won’t matter when Horde Prime destroys the universe. As Catra pointed out, Adora would still come to rescue Glimmer. It’s their combined knowledge that leads to the solution.

Getting Glimmer out is the key, but Glimmer is unable to do this alone. Catra has the knowledge of the teleporter, Catra has the knowledge as well as the physical combat skills necessary to overpower the clones, and Catra has to be the one to take down the barrier that divides the two of them. Only Catra is in a position to achieve this. In terms of emotional metaphors, Glimmer is ready to let Catra in, but that fact alone isn’t enough. Catra has to be willing as well.

And the plan succeeds. It’s Catra’s most vulnerable action yet and she stands willing to sacrifice herself. Catra sends Glimmer, this metaphorical representation of her own insecurities, to Adora. This action is the very thing that ultimately saves Catra. She’s stuck with Horde Prime and her defenses are all ripped away, but it’s this show of vulnerability that affords Adora and company the opportunity to come in prepared and save this defenseless cat. Glimmer’s willingness to forgive Catra is significant for a lot of reasons, not the least of which is that Catra is the party most responsible for the conditions that led to Angella’s sacrifice, and Glimmer cites Catra sacrificing herself on Horde Prime’s ship as the reason she’s willing to help Adora go back and save Catra.

And once she’s saved, when Catra next gets the liberty to determine her own outfit, as she treads a path of vulnerability and learning to follow her heart...

...the sleeve and fingerless gloves are gone. The costume she put on when she took her seat on Hordak’s throne has fallen away. That’s not who she wants to be anymore. Now she’s ready to start on the path of growing more into herself.

The push and pull contentious relationship between Catra and Glimmer has reached its conclusion, but there are still a few moments of interest. In 5x08, there are several instances where Catra questions what seem to be tactically unsound decisions from the Rebellion and they shrug off the concerns. Near the end of the episode, it’s Glimmer who questions the tactics and Catra who shrugs it off. This shows that they’re both getting more comfortable with each other and also both getting more comfortable with the parts in themselves that make them similar to each other.

In 5x10, when Catra finds herself in trouble, trapped and confronted with rising water, she calls Glimmer, knowing now that Glimmer is someone she can trust when she comes up against the limits of her own vulnerabilities.

In 5x12, Catra goes to Bow and Glimmer, looking for Adora. Glimmer informs Catra that Adora left them behind. Catra says: “Of course she’s gone. That’s what she does, isn’t it?” Glimmer was caught off guard by this, but Catra has recognized this vulnerability in Glimmer since Season 2. “You think she’s not going to leave you behind too, Sparkles.” This time Catra’s not just here criticize; she’s here to help. She warns Bow and Glimmer about Horde Prime’s plans and volunteers herself to take over helping Adora. Glimmer comes up against the limit of her vulnerabilities, but she can tag in Catra to help her now.

In the literal sense, this shows the value of letting other people in. In the metaphorical sense, it shows the value of accepting oneself. Learning from others, finding the common ground, gives us a fuller understanding than we can achieve on our own. No one can do everything alone, but working with people who are skilled where we come up short, guarded where we are vulnerable, and open where we are closed off is what unlocks the potential to accomplish things that would have otherwise been impossible.

I love that message, but I also love the metaphorical message. Glimmer and Catra have repeatedly seen in each other the things they were afraid of in themselves. Hating each other is tantamount to hating themselves and their acceptance of each other is tantamount to accepting themselves, which makes both of them more well-rounded and helps them to move forward.

And those lessons, to me, are among the most significant things about their intersecting journeys. They accept the differences in each other, they recognize the similarities in each other, and they come together to build each other up. It’s at once a journey of learning to accept others and a journey of learning to accept themselves. They learn that greeting their shortcomings with anger is ultimately self-destructive, ignoring these vulnerabilities is perilous, and it’s only through acceptance that they can begin to understand themselves, compensate for their limitations, and better themselves.

They each look into a mirror, see their own insecurities staring back at them, then decide to give that person a hug and say: “I’ve got your back.”

[bloodyspade0000]

30-day knb challenge: Day 1- Favorite Male character

↳ Haizaki Shougo

I am not justifying Haizaki's behaviour. I think he needs a tall glass of respect woman juice and therapy. This is just meant to explain why he is my favourite character and help you better understand him as a character. Do not send hate or take my words out of context. You will be reported, deleted and cancelled. Thank you and enjoy. :)

My favourite character is Haizaki Shougo *dodges tomatoes* a lot of people in the fandom hate this guy for many reasons. It's kind of funny how many people hate him and the amount of hate he gets just for existing. Like bruh; he's sixteen, leave him alone. 😂

His whole existence is just sad. He was literally created to be hated.

Like straight up, Tadatoshi Fujimaki even admitted that he hated Haizaki. Haizaki's sole purpose of existing is to make the Generation of Miracles look better even though they’re just as problematic as he. No one is fucking perfect and is about time people woke the fuck up and realized it. Your faves are problematic move the fuck on.

Yes, the Miracles are redeemable but so is Haizaki. Yet, unlike the Miracles, he does not get redeemable. No, he disappears and is never seen again. Like bitch, what the fuck!? if you’re gonna introduce a character to only have them disappear for a long time and either have them show up again or just never mention them again. Wasting the potential they had to be a very good character or not having them redeem themselves while the other characters who were just as fucking problematic get a fucking redemption arc because they’re fucking main characters!? What’s the point of that character even existing in the first place? What kind of bullshit is that? Just to have them exist to make the main characters look good? How the fuck does that make sense? Like where is my Haizaki redemption arc? Do I have to write it on my own? I will write it. I am writing one.

Haizaki is the only character I could relate to. Being second best, struggling to find somewhere to fit in and overshadowed and replaced by someone everyone thinks is better than you. It's fucking depressing, okay? You spend your whole life thinking you’re not good enough, and it hurts. I don't feel like going too deep into it because I don't owe you a detailed explanation of my trauma, okay?. So I'll save that for my fics where I self-project half of it onto Haizaki. It’s a coping mechanism, okay? Therapy is fucking expensive.

The anime ruined his whole character, got rid of his whole arc and shorted it down, and made him worse than he really is.

A post explaining how the anime did him dirty and goes more in-depth about his character

I am not trying to justify his actions, i.e. him manhandling Alex and beating Himura up. He does terrible shit. We all do lousy shit sometimes, but that doesn't make us bad people. Making mistakes is a part of being human, and we're supposed to hold people accountable for their actions and help them realize what they’re doing is wrong, allowing them to grow and change. Not condemn them and ostracize them, which leads to isolation and a lot of psychological trauma and self-hatred, and as someone who has dealt with—is still dealing with all three. It is not fun. It makes living painful. Highly unrecommended.

Haizaki does not have a positive role model in his life nor anybody he can turn to, everyone has already given up on him. Even Nijimura and Kuroko didn’t even try to help him, being more focused on the Miracles. (Yes, I know kuroko tried to stop him from throwing his basketball shoes away, but that doesn’t fucking count because after that Kuroko just gave up on Haiazki too). Haizaki has probably grown grew up knowing only violence and not a single ounce of kindness, turning him into the bitter and angry little boy he is.

Haizaki had so much potential. But instead of making him a great villain that potential was WASTED on fucking Kise.

Also, the Kaijo vs Seirin match in the winter cup was completely useless because Kise already got redeemed and he literally got no character development from it.

And Seirin was gonna fucking win anyways because duh thier the main characters. 🙄

Now some headcanons I think about a lot:

1. He gets abused. Some psychological behavioural consequences of child abuse are unhealthy sexual practices and juvenile delinquency, and Haizaki exhibits all three which are some external behaviours of most (NOT ALL) male abuse victims. Haizaki's a womanizer, aggressive, hostile and violent. Yet, he backs down when someone stronger than him comes around and puts him in his place i.e. Aomine and Nijimura.

a factsheet explaining the long term consequences of child abuse and neglect

How to help a friend dealing with family abuse or neglect

How to Handle Abuse

2. He's a victim. And when you're a victim, you either become angry and cynical with everything and everyone around you, swearing never to be a victim again and struggle with gaining back control of your life. Not wanting anyone to see you being vulnerable because being vulnerable makes you weak. Being weak makes you shatter. You always shatter like glass, cutting yourself every time you pick up broken pieces, watching as blood trickles through your fingers.

Your body is constantly on high alert. The default is flight or fight—survival to the fittest.

Or you bite your lip and keep your head down, bottling everything inside and looking for escapes or seeking validation. You want to be wanted and loved because you struggle with loving and accepting yourself. There's always a voice in the back of your head telling you, you're not good enough or that it's your fault. That everything is your fault. Self-hatred and self-doubt are your tormentors.

Or it's a combination between both—a constant struggle.

And I believe Haizaki portrays both from the way he acts and presents himself. Especially since his motto is literally "Survival of the fittest,” and he had once told Kuroko, " there are bad guys and then the really scary people," or something along those lines, which I believe he is talking from experience. You learn from your experiences. They either make you or break you.

3. He's touch-starved.

What Does It Mean to Be Touch Starved?

4. He's bisexual and has a lot of internalized homophobia. I can just feel his internalized homophobia rolling off of him. Bruh, I just know cuz I am bisexual, and I have struggled with internalized homophobia and still sadly struggle with it cuz I grew up surrounded by homophobic people.

I still live with them. 😭

Also, we live in a society that thinks straight is the default.

What internalized homophobia is.

5. His sexual awakening was probably Aomine or Kise. Could be both 😂?

6. He cries himself to sleep every night.

7. He's observant and a great judge of character. It's a fact. This guy literally predicted the downfall of the Miracles. Straight up warned Kuroko too. Too bad Kuroko didn't listen to him.

8. He's hilarious. When he first appeared in the manga, he literally called Himura a loser, lol. XD

9. He's a closeted softie and a total tsundere.

10. doesn't know how to react to kindness and will think you're threatening him or will feel really awkward and uncomfortable but will cover it up with his scowl, or he'll have a breakdown.

11. needs a lot of reassurance and head pats

12. swears a lot. Has no filter.

13. His bother is in the yakuza or some high position of power, and he feels inferior to him. It also explains why Haizaki gets away with things because he would have been kicked out of school if his bother wasn't either-or. I'm talking about his bother being in the yakuza, lol. XD

14. He and Momoi dated for a while but broke up on a mutual understanding that thier relationship just didn't work out. They're best friends and hang out sometimes.

15. Haizaki's good with kids and just genuinely likes them. He would be a great father and try his best to raise his kids right.

16. He gets sick really easily

17. He's clingy

18. He has no friends, mainly because he doesn't want people to get close to him because he's afraid of getting hurt again. Also, everyone in knb hates him.

19. He watches cartoons cuz he was never allowed to watch them when he was a kid. His childhood is trash, okay?

20. He hides in the closet because that's where he feels safe the most—rhetorically and literally.

21. Sleep-deprived and only runs on caffeine and spite.

List of fics that portray Haizaki better than the anime:

Heavy is the head by extrastellar

Idle Hands by DarkWoods

Another Chance by regretting my username_ (777imou_offline367)

What Matters is that We're Together by StrawFairy

06:00:00 of Haizaki Shougo (4) by ReiClien

This Is Happening by SharkGirl

What is Love by voices_in_my_head

A completely uncalled catharsis by oddball

One-shots

intertwined, under a spell by kornevable

ԼƠƔƐ & ӇΛƬƐ by Arthuria_PenDragon

delirium by extrastellar

me with you by doublejoint

Turn My Camera On by wordsliketeeth

At Summer's End by doublejoint

Taste by Hibari1_san

I Can't Get Enough of You by HisDarkSecret

I don't care if it hurts by llowsywriter

Ashes by doublejoint

broken things by lowsywriter

Series:

Finally found each other by suzakukills

This Is Happening Universe by SharkGirl

DNA by flowerway

My WIPS:

Isn’t it lovely?

Broken Crown

Love me, Love me, Love me

Grey skies

Rabbit hole

A playlist of songs that I believe fit Haizaki

Kuroko’s basketball’s manga

In conclusion, You can hate Haizaki as much as you want. But just keep it to yourself. Haizaki is my baby and I will protect him with my life.