#but it absolutely gives you a false sense of security

[crueliste]

analysis of the rocket execs poses because i got manic and wrote it in the state of such

know that this is mostly based on my personal lore and my personal extreme autism about this content and only that. ✌️

ARCHER A perfect one really. This cannot be topped. Absolutely nothing I would change. Maybe I'm biased because he's my favorite, but from a first glance I can see what he's up to. Perfectly straight and almost frigid posture, the hand on his chin conveys both curiosity and confidence. It shows his analytical personality, like he's studying or inspecting you or scanning for weaknesses, should you be stupid enough to show any.

The hand behind his back is the same posture servants and butlers showcase. It shows subservience and discipline, as while he's the top executive of the four and currently in charge during their boss's absence, he is still inherently and fiercely loyal to Giovanni. Simultaneously, it's a sign of restraint and control. He isn't particularly interested in hurting you because he values his time and has way more important things to take care of, but wouldn't feel bad doing it if you get in his way.

ARIANA With her, I want to especially highlight the SPRITE art, because she's the only one where the sprite art is a lot different compared to the drawn art. The drawn one is good, I love the hand being held down in that position like she's telling a dog to heel. She has a ton of confidence, as shown by the hand on her hip and her head ever so slightly tilted. For me, it's less curiosity and more 'wow you really think you can get through here'. In both arts, her stance is also much more wide compared to Archer's. She is confident enough to take more risks than him, and is more commanding than inspecting, making them the perfect leading duo.

And in the sprite art specifically, she strikes a whole POSE. This woman doesn't see you as a threat, she thinks you're a pathetic bug and will find so much enjoyment in crushing you like one.

PETREL He's just a little chill guy! Would you ever feel threatened by a guy looking at you like this? There is absolutely nothing threatening in this pose, a big contrast to the previous one. Hands super loosely on his hips and his posture hunched over shows exactly what he means it to; this will lull them into a sense of false security. You could even let your guard down for a second. You can see the difference of looseness of the right hand on his hip compared to Ariana's. Would you guess this guy has 6 BOMBS in his team (his team of 6 koffings that I fully believe were meant to blow the radio tower up). Of course you wouldn't, this is just a guy!

PROTON Enter mega bastard. The WIDEST stance of them all. He thinks of you as such a small threat that he feels confident enough to turn his whole BACK on you, while still giving you the worst asshole smirk around. Super wide stance to just emphasize the confidence. He will bring you hell just for the sake of it, you absolutely don't have to give him a reason. More confidence derived from the blind adoration given by his underlings. 'Oh executive Proton, you are so cool!' Assuming the hidden hand is on his belt, he's ready to sicc his pokémon onto you, just look at him wrong once. It's like he wants you to do exactly that. And in contrast, the hand on the hat is a more playful gesture. He will attack you, and will have fun doing it.

[danielnelsen]

ok so i absolutely think there should be consequences and reactivity for sleeping with other people if you’re romancing someone, but just from a game design perspective, i have come across a bit of an issue

so i slept with the emperor (no reaction), then two nights later i slept with halsin (positive reaction), then two nights later i slept with mizora (possible breakup). and i think that last reaction is completely reasonable, but this series of events, in that order and so close together, definitely sets a precedent

[santaasi]

bet on you

pairing: james potter x grumpy!reader

summary: james bets you that if he wins his next match, you owe him a date. he wins, of course — but you’re not going to make it easy for him.

warnings: fluff, grumpy x sunshine, no use of y/n, english isn’t my first language

word count: 3.0k

a/n: there are so many of you who followed me for james content after obviously blind so i just decided to give you a little thank u for all your love and support.

ᯓ★ now playing…

niall horan - must be love

"YOU’RE TOO COCKY FOR SOMEONE WHO WAS NEARLY THROWN OFF HIS BROOMSTICK LAST MATCH, POTTER."

Your voice was dry, unimpressed, but James only grinned wider, twirling his wand between his fingers as he lounged on the Gryffindor common room sofa. His Quidditch robes were still rumpled from practice, the fabric clinging in places where the sweat hadn’t entirely dried. His hair — Merlin, his hair — was an absolute disaster, even by James Potter standards, the dark curls damp and sticking up in every possible direction, like he’d flown straight through a hurricane and come out victorious on the other side.

You sat across from him, arms folded tight against your chest, doing your best impression of someone completely indifferent to his presence. The common room was warm, the low glow of the fireplace painting everything in shades of gold and crimson, and yet you wrapped your blanket more tightly around your shoulders, as if that might stop the ridiculous, treacherous pounding of your heart.

James tilted his head, eyes twinkling behind the reflection of the flames in his glasses. Too charming for his own good.

“You wound me, sweetheart,” he sighed dramatically, pressing a hand to his chest. "I was merely faking vulnerability — to lull the Slytherins into a false sense of security.”

You snorted, gaze fixed on the fire. “Right. And I suppose you meant to drop the Quaffle against Ravenclaw?”

James gasped, shoving his glasses up the bridge of his nose in a performance of deep, personal offense. “First of all, I didn’t drop it — I strategically redirected it. And second, I think you underestimate my skills, and frankly, that hurts.”

You rolled your eyes, fully prepared to come up with something scathing in response, but then James — the menace — moved.

He dropped onto the couch beside you with all the grace of a kneazle leaping onto its favorite perch, effortlessly invading your space, his weight shifting the cushions beneath you. You sucked in a sharp breath as his arm draped over the back of the sofa, boxing you in.

A strangled noise escaped your lips before you could stop it. You shoved at his shoulder in a pathetic attempt to create distance, but James only laughed, low and amused, his body warm beside yours, radiating that post-match heat.

That sound — that deep, genuine laugh — sent something fluttering through your stomach, something entirely inconvenient. You clenched your jaw, forcing yourself to scowl harder, hoping to smother whatever the hell was happening inside you.

James, of course, remained completely unbothered. If anything, he leaned in closer, his grin widening. “Plus,” he murmured, voice lilting with amusement, “how can you expect me to play properly when the most beautiful girl in Hogwarts is watching me from the stands, sweetheart?”

Your head snapped toward him, eyes narrowing. His smile was positively criminal — all mischief and confidence, his hazel eyes glinting with unspoken challenge.

James and his bloody charm.

Your frown deepened, but it was becoming harder and harder to hold onto. He looked so pleased with himself, sitting there with his damp curls tumbling over his forehead, a few unruly strands falling into his eyes. Your fingers twitched — traitorous things — itching to push them back, just to feel how soft they were.

Absolutely not.

You turned away sharply, hoping he hadn’t noticed the way your breath hitched.

Damn James Potter.

You needed to think about anything else.

Quidditch.

Yes. Quidditch.

James was a good player — some might even say exceptional (and maybe you were one of them, in the privacy of your own thoughts). But you’d rather kiss the Giant Squid than admit that to his face. His ego was already large enough to smother the entire wizarding world; the last thing he needed was your praise fueling it further.

It was your duty — no, your moral obligation — to keep him grounded. To roll your eyes at his dramatics, to scoff at his flirtations, to challenge him at every opportunity.

Even if, in moments like this, when the firelight danced across his face and his laughter filled the spaces between you, your resolve felt dangerously fragile.

Even if, against all reason and logic, you were already hopelessly, disastrously in love with him.

But he didn’t need to know that.

So you bit your bottom lip, let out a quiet chuckle, and looked back at him with a slow, knowing smirk.

“Right,” you said, voice dripping with amusement. “Because obviously your Quidditch skills depend entirely on me.”

James grinned, delighted, like you’d just paid him the highest compliment in the world.

“Exactly,” he said, nudging your shoulder. “Finally, she admits it.”

You huffed, shaking your head, but even as you turned away, you knew he could see the smile threatening at the corners of your lips.

Damn him.

James leaned forward, that infuriating smirk tugging at his lips again. “Alright,” he drawled, mischief dripping from every syllable. “Let’s make this more interesting.”

You raised an eyebrow, unimpressed, but the way his hazel eyes glinted in the firelight sent a prickle of warning down your spine.

“If we win against Slytherin this weekend,” he continued, his voice low and coaxing, “you have to ask me out.”

You blinked.

What did he just say?

For half a second, your brain short-circuited, your thoughts stuttering to a halt like a broomstick caught in an unexpected gust of wind. But you recovered quickly, forcing out a chuckle that (hopefully) hid the way your pulse had just launched itself into orbit.

“You say that like it’s some kind of real challenge,” you scoffed, tilting your head. “Gryffindor always wins.”

James only shrugged, all casual confidence, but his smirk deepened. “Then you’ve got nothing to lose, do you?” He leaned in slightly, his voice laced with unmistakable amusement. “Unless, of course, you’re afraid.”

You rolled your eyes, exhaling through your nose as you turned to face him fully, arms crossing over your chest. Your faces were too close — close enough that you could make out the faint freckle just beneath his left eye, close enough that you caught the lingering scent of grass and wind still clinging to his robes.

And yet, you refused to back away.

At least outwardly. Inside, your heart was performing a particularly violent tango with your liver at the mere thought of going on a date with James bloody Potter.

“I just don’t think it’s a fair bet,” you replied smoothly, ignoring the treacherous heat creeping up your neck. “Gryffindor wins practically every match.”

James hummed, tilting his head as if considering this, though the glimmer of mischief in his gaze suggested he already had a counterattack prepared. “Alright,” he conceded, pretending to think. “Then name your terms. If we lose…” He paused for dramatic effect, then grinned. “I’ll do whatever you want. No complaints. For an entire week.”

Your lips curled into a slow, wicked smile. “Just like that?”

“Just like that,” he echoed, looking far too pleased with himself.

You feigned deep contemplation, tapping a finger against your chin, though in reality, you were far too aware of the way James was watching you, waiting, expecting you to take the bait.

“That’s quite the offer,” you mused. “But don’t expect me to go easy on you when you lose, Potter.”

James laughed, bright and easy, before holding out his hand. “Shake on it?”

Your fingers clasped his, and the moment your hands met, a strange sort of certainty settled in your stomach — heavy and inevitable.

Because James Potter had never lost.

And somehow, you didn’t think this time would be an exception.

THE DAY LEADING UP TO THE FINAL MATCH FLEW BY FASTER THAN THE GOLDEN SNITCH IN THE DYING MOMENTS OF GAME.

James was a blur of scarlet and gold, barely more than a passing shadow in your periphery. You caught glimpses of him at breakfast — hair even messier than usual, eyes alight with that reckless, competitive fire — before he was gone again, dashing out to the Quidditch pitch to practice some new, impossible maneuver.

He was taking your bet far too seriously.

And you hated the way your stomach clenched at the thought.

By the time the match arrived, the air at the Quidditch stadium was thick with tension and the unmistakable electric hum of anticipation. The whole school had turned out, huddled together under the late spring sky, the Gryffindor stands an unbroken wave of red and gold. And you — against all better judgment — were sitting among them, wrapped in James’s scarf, the same one he’d tossed around your shoulders before the game with an infuriating grin.

"For good luck," he’d said, brushing a lock of hair behind your ear like it was the most natural thing in the world. And then, lowering his voice, he’d added, "Enjoy the view, sweetheart. After I win, you’re in for the most unforgettable date of your life."

Cocky bastard.

Now, watching the game unfold, you realized with a sinking feeling in your chest that James hadn’t been bluffing.

Gryffindor wasn’t just winning.

They were annihilating Slytherin.

And James — Merlin help you — was everywhere.

He weaved through the air with impossible speed, dodging Bludgers with infuriating ease, stealing the Quaffle like it had never belonged to anyone else, and scoring goal after goal as the Slytherins scrambled to keep up.

Then, just because he could, he banked his broom hard, looped right past the Gryffindor stands, and — of course — paused just long enough to wink at you before somersaulting through the air and landing another goal.

Show-off.

You scowled. The worst part was, it was impressive.

By the time the final whistle blew, Gryffindor had obliterated Slytherin by at least a hundred points. The stands exploded — cheers ringing through the stadium, banners waving wildly, students practically falling over themselves in celebration.

Amid the chaos, James ripped off his helmet, ran a hand through his already wind-wrecked hair, and turned — scanning the crowd, searching.

His gaze found yours in an instant.

And then he winked.

Smug. Smug, insufferable bastard.

The taste of defeat curled bitter on your tongue as you shot to your feet, yanking James’s scarf tighter around your neck before storming toward the exit.

Behind you, James’s name was being shouted from every direction, his teammates tackling him in celebration, the crowd chanting in triumph.

And yet — somehow — you knew his eyes were still on you.

You may have lost the bet.

But you weren’t about to make this easy for him.

THE COLD NIGHT AIR CURLED AROUND YOU LIKE AN OLD FRIEND, slipping through the courtyard’s stone archways and brushing against your skin. You leaned back against the weathered wall, staring up at the sky as the first stars flickered into existence — tiny, distant lights swallowed by the vast darkness above. This was your sanctuary, your quiet refuge from the chaos that raged inside Gryffindor Tower.

And tonight, there was plenty of chaos.

Sirius had cranked up the music, turning the common room into a swaying, smoke-filled mess of bodies. The scent of butterbeer and firewhiskey clung to the air, laughter rang out over the sound of a badly tuned guitar, and James — bloody James Potter — was undoubtedly at the center of it all, basking in his victory like the smug, overgrown golden retriever he was.

You had slipped away the first chance you got. You never did well with crowds, especially after a match like that. The noise, the movement, the suffocating heat of so many people in one space — it was too much. You preferred the quiet, the stillness.

But, of course, James Potter never let you have nice things.

You sensed him before he spoke — his presence a familiar, buzzing warmth in the air. And knowing this, he didn’t waste any time.

“So,” came his voice, smooth and laced with amusement. “About that date.”

You sighed, long and dramatic, tilting your head just enough to meet his gaze. He stood in front of you, still wearing that victorious grin, hair a tousled mess from the game, his uniform untucked like he had just thrown his robes aside before heading out to find you.

"I suppose I did agree to this," you mused, drawing out the words.

James nodded eagerly. “You did agree.”

You hummed, pretending to think. “Alright, then. You can take me to Hogsmeade this weekend.”

James beamed, already straightening up. “Brilliant! I’ll pick you up at—”

“But,” you interjected, holding up a single finger, “only if you prove that you’re worth my time.”

James halted mid-sentence. His eyebrows furrowed slightly, and his hand came up to scratch the back of his head — his signature I-don’t-like-not-knowing-things move.

For a split second, he looked adorably confused, like a puppy who’d just been denied a treat. You had to bite the inside of your cheek to keep from laughing.

“What does that mean?” he finally asked, narrowing his eyes at you in suspicion.

You shrugged, pushing off the wall. “Let’s see how dedicated you are, Potter.”

His lips curled into a lopsided grin as he folded his arms across his chest. “Are you testing me?”

“Obviously.”

You took a step closer, your head tilting slightly as you met his gaze. His brown eyes gleamed under the soft glow of torchlight, catching every flicker of warmth from the flames. The moment stretched, charged with something unspoken, something electric.

Then you exhaled, a small cloud of condensation forming in the night air, and added, "Think of this as a trial."

James let out a laugh, shaking his head. “Merlin, you’re a menace.”

You smirked. “What, afraid you won’t be able to impress me?”

James didn’t falter. If anything, he leaned in, closing the space between you just enough that you caught the scent of his cologne — something warm, like cedar and a hint of cinnamon.

Your breath hitched when his fingers brushed against your cheek, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear.

His voice dropped, smooth as velvet. “Oh, sweetheart, I know I can make an impression on you.”

Your heart lurched, traitorous thing that it was.

For a moment, just one moment, you were completely caught in his orbit. Your eyes flickered to his lips — damn him for standing so close, for smelling so good, for looking at you like that. Heat crept up your spine, and you nearly leaned into him, nearly—

But then you recovered.

Rolling your eyes, you stepped past him, shoulders brushing as you went. “We’ll see, Potter.”

And with that, you left him standing there, his victorious smile turning into something else entirely — something intrigued, something thrilled.

James Potter lived for a challenge.

And Merlin, you had just given him one.

JAMES POTTER TRIED.

He tried so hard.

It started small. He brought you textbooks between classes, even the ones you definitely didn’t need, just so he had an excuse to linger. He saved a seat for you at breakfast, nudging aside a stunned first-year with a casual, “Sorry, mate — reserved.”

Then, he got bolder.

A bouquet of daisies — enchanted to float in perfect formation — drifted onto your desk in Transfiguration, twirling in the air before settling neatly beside your parchment. You watched them with narrowed eyes as James, sitting two rows back, shot you a wink.

At one point, he even physically shoved Peeves aside when the poltergeist attempted to douse you in ink. “Bugger off, Peevesy,” James said cheerfully while you stared, half-impressed, half-mortified.

It was cute. It was infuriating.

The final straw?

A stunning display of desperation: an entire stash of Chocolate Frogs left on your bed, stacked like a damn shrine to your stubbornness.

That was it. Enough was enough.

That evening, you stormed into the Gryffindor common room, where James lounged on the couch with Sirius and Remus. Sirius was draped across the armrest, half-asleep, while Remus read with an air of deep patience, no doubt enduring whatever nonsense James had been spouting for the last hour.

James looked up as you approached, his brown eyes wide, pupils dilating like a puppy seeing its favorite person walk through the door. The firelight caught in his glasses, flickering gold against the lenses. It was annoyingly reminiscent of the night you had made this stupid bet, and that alone made you want to hex something.

He blinked. “Uh—”

Before you could think twice — before your pride could scream turn around and flee — you grabbed him by the front of his shirt, yanked him up to his feet, and kissed him.

The room went completely still.

The kiss was quick but firm, proof of your surrender, of your utter defeat at the hands of James bloody Potter. His lips were warm and slightly chapped from the cold, and for the first time all week, he wasn’t talking. When you pulled away, James looked thoroughly wrecked — eyes wide, lips parted, hair even more disheveled than usual.

Sirius, naturally, ruined the moment.

“Finally,” he muttered with a long-suffering sigh.

James, still stunned, exhaled sharply. “Damn it.”

You huffed, flustered beyond belief. “You’ve won. Come back tomorrow at two. Bye.”

And with that, you spun on your heel, eager to escape before your brain caught up with what had just happened. But James, damn his Quidditch reflexes, recovered faster than you did. His hand caught your wrist before you had taken a full step, and in one smooth motion, he pulled you right back into his chest.

A disgruntled noise escaped your lips as you landed against him.

James grinned down at you, his voice low and maddeningly smug. “Oh, I know.”

You glared up at him, rolling your eyes so hard they might have fallen out of your head — but your lips twitched, betraying you. James saw it, of course. Smug bastard.

Without missing a beat, he tugged you down onto the couch beside him, tucking you against his side like it was the most natural thing in the world. His arm settled around your waist, warm and comfortable, and when he pressed a kiss to the top of your head, you swore your heart forgot how to function.

Sirius groaned. “Great. Now we have to deal with this.”

Remus, without looking up from his book, simply hummed. “Called it.”

James ignored them entirely, his thumb tracing slow, lazy circles against your hip as he returned to whatever ridiculous conversation they had been having before you stormed in.

You didn’t move away.

After all, a bet was a bet.

hey-hey! <3

thank you so much for taking the time to read my work — it truly means the world to me. if you enjoyed it, I’d love to hear your thoughts! comments, likes, and reblogs not only make my day but also inspire me to keep writing. seriously, every little bit of support fuels my motivation!

if you have any requests, feel free to send them in my inbox! I’d love to bring your ideas to life. and also if you'd like to be added to the taglist, feel free to dm me or leave a comment, and I’ll make sure to include you.

thanks again for being here — you’re amazing!

                                     – your santi 🪐

masterlist

[yameoto]

any more thoughts on puppy art.. please. only if u want to though haha !! (please?)

ohh u guys love your darling little lapdog huh?

LAPDOG ART DONALDSON! fem!reader

▸ a drooler. nosing his head between your legs n he's already salivating. he's so cute like that. face smushed between your thighs, panting as spit pools in his mouth, nose twitching like a cute little bunny at the scent of your arousal. taking the trim of your panties between his teeth, dragging it down inch by inch. quivering because he just wants to rip them off but the last time he did that he tore your nice lacy lingerie and u didnt touch him for a week. when he eats you out he laps at your cunt like an eager puppy. comes away absolutely glistening. dripping, even. your juices n his saliva smearing his cheeks, his nose, dribbling down his chin.

▸ bigggg on humping. obviously. when you're too busy to give him attention he'll just shuffle over onto your lap and just start rubbing up against you. he's ridden out the best orgasms that way; creaming in his already-sodden boxers as slick gets all over ur thigh. he likes to do it when you're working or when you're on a call (you always punish him best that way). oftentimes you'll wake up at night to slick sheets—finding him grindin up against you, moaning and whimpering. a sleepy, boneless mess on your knee. he'll already have gotten himself off thrice before he tries to wakes you, just to be safe (you might take it away from him, after all). ▸ teething.... grown ass man teething... gnawing on your shoulder to stop himself from crying out when you let him fuck you.. nibbling your bottom lip red n raw when you kiss.. slobbering all over your mouth. during sex if you tease him he'll start to chew anxiously at the end of ur bra strap, the hem of your shorts, your panties if you keep him waiting too long. sometimes randomly takes your hand by the wrist and takes a fake chomp out of it (affectionate).

▸ not beyond jus being your lil stress relief toy. coming back home and he's been so good for you. he won his match. he's cooked dinner. but you don't have time for any of that. "oh, baby, don't give me that look. cock out, now." and he makes a little mewling noise and immediately his shorts are a crumpled puddle on the floor—raging boner popping out, all swollen n red n leaking bc hes been waiting for you for hours. ▸ sighing, telling him to sit and so he does. legs spreading wide on the couch, blinking up at u in earnest neediness. and when you sink onto his cock he makes this insane, visceral whining noise—back arcing off the seat. ▸ cockwarmer? more like cuntwarmer. you tell him don't move and don't cum. an impossible ask. he's pawing at your back, whimpering when your only response is to lean back heavier, sinking your full weight down on his poor, poor cock. n it feels soso good but he only lasts two minutes on a good day! let alone when you're switching the tv on and settling back into him like he's part of the couch. occasionally your hips jump, walls pulsing tight, choking his sensitive dick. you're grinding down into his lap and he's twitching inside of u and hot tears are prickling his eyes—fingers digging into your thighs, trembling.

▸ time ticking on.. the coil of heat in his gut winding tighter n tighter.. art's cheeks are flushed and hes wetting the back of your shirt with his silent tears. he persists, though, because he's good. he's gonna be a good boy for you. and it works! for a time, when you seem like you've almost forgotten your pussy is strangling his cock and you're only rolling your hips occasionally, sending warm thrums of pleasure through him. lulling him into a false sense of security.

▸ until all of a sudden you decide to be mean and for whatever reason you lift your hips before slamming them back down again, and his sharp gasp and slurred mewls perfectly cue the geyser that erupts from his slit.

▸ not even letting him cum inside you.. sliding off his spurting cock thats blowing cum like a volcano. hot, sticky strings arcing in the air and splattering all over the carpet, the couch cushions. his eyes glazing over, all glassy n sparkly as he crumples back in the couch, blubbering tearful apologies as his cock leaks like a faucet, staining the poor, new pillows.

▸ adores aftercare. or just your comfort in general. please rest your hand against his cheek and let him sigh and melt and nuzzle into the palm of your hand like you're taking the weight of the world off his shoulders. tug gently on his hair. scratch his scalp. let him curl up on your lap and pat him and coo sweet nothings in his ear. simple things, like "sweet baby, did so good today." or "tired puppy. took mommy so well."

▸ "fuck— m'sorry. m'sorry, m'sorry—" "hey, shh, darling. aw, don't cry. mommy's got you. how bout you curl up on momma's lap, kay?" "..mkay."

[sagebrush-and-sadness]

BOOTHILL HEADCANONS

author's notes just some silly goofy headcanons for Boothill because he's a cutie patootie and I love him fem!reader, completely SFW ♡ and ⥩ are appreciated!

※ He always patiently waits for you to finish applying sunscreen or moisturizer to his face before he can finally go shooting bad guys to his heart's content. Most of the time he jokes around or teasingly dodges your hands; sometimes he mumbles that this is embarassing and he really doesn't care, sweetie, come on, but he will always give you a kiss as a token of gratitude. Because, trust me, he does care.

※ Loves snapping his teeth at you. It's a (weirdly charming) sign of affection, a habit Boothill took up pretty early in your relationship. You teasingly call it a cute aggression and he doesn't deny it. However, if he does that in public at someone else, you better get a hold of him and scatter away because the man is getting pissed.

※ Oh, he absolutely will blow raspberries on your neck whenever he has a chance to hug you from behind. And he's as sly as an old fox, lulling you into a false sense of security with gentle kisses and nuzzles — just to violently strike a poor, helpless you and dance away laughing joyfully.

※ Your first kiss with Boothill was that of desperation — he just barely made it out alive from one of the IPC warehouses, his left leg limp and dragging lifelessly across the floor, a few bullet holes adorning his signature hat, thankfully not lost in the heat of a battle. He looked no better than a wild ragged coyotte, a pitiful thing, an unsightly creature smelling of rot and blood, but upon seeing him, safe and relatively sound, your heart swelled with tenderness and your eyes — with hot tears. You wanted to kiss him then and there, and he anticipated as much, grabbing your face in his hands, firm yet gentle, and all but smashing your lips together. Perhaps, it was a shatter of all your dreams about a romantic first kiss, but at that moment it was the most perfect one...

...Or was it? As tender and loving as Boothill was with you, his tongue still tasted like oil and gunpowder. He laughed it off the first time you made a face, but since then he's made a mental note to always carry a bag of candies and lollipops with him.

※ He's the type of guy to randomly get you fresh field flowers.

Also the type to dance with you while holding one in his teeth. There is a whole anecdote about him picking an unknown flower that turned out to be quite poisonous and suffering from tongue swelling half a day after that. Don't bring this story up, though, his male ego is still recovering.

※ Boothill's upbringing obliges him to treat women with courtesy and respect. He may look like a heartbreaker to some, but in truth, his mindset is that of a traditional man. This said, he loves referring to you as a 'woman'. His woman. He relishes the fact and there is so much pride, so much infatuation and genuine awe behind this word every time he all but purrs it out. It's a strangely specific nickname of his, and no matter how unusual it might have sounded to you at first, now your heart flatters every time you hear it drip from his lips. After all, you are his woman and he is your handsome cowboy.

He might however bark at you when you're pestering him. Something in the lines of 'I'm busy, woman, what are ya yapping 'bout?'. Naturally, he never uses it as a means to offend and will put a bullet through the head of anyone who dares belittle you like that. The unspoken rule of a cowboy says: never criticize another gentleman's hat, horse and wife. And Boothill is very serious about his rules, even if technically you are not his wife (yet).

※ He adores it when you dress up for him. No matter how often or seldom you do that, no matter what exactly you're wearing — a cute cocktail dress or a strict suit — he would whistle low and stride right to you with the air of a beau who just saw the girl he'd buy a drink for. His sultry pretentious flirting never fails to make you giggle.

※ Boothill will always find time for you. No matter how many light days separate you from each other, no matter how busy the schedule or how dangerous the enemies, he can never really get you out of his head. You are always there, his little beacon of light, and he knows that you're waiting for him with worry and hope. He hates telling you that you can't come with him this time; hates seeing your smile drop and your fingers fidget anxiously as you watch him step on an unknown land. He misses you dearly five minutes into the mission, so he calls you as often as he can, showing you all the pictures he took or all the things he got for you as souvenirs. When it comes to your messages or calls there is never really bad timing for Boothill — an inconvenient one, perhaps, but even the heat of the battle will not stop him from picking up. He might even consider against shooting the poor son of a bitch that let him talk to you peacefully out of courtesy, but we will see about that.

※ Ever since you came into his life, Boothill's spending habits have gotten somewhat healthier. The thing is — the guy is loaded, yet money never held any real interest for him. After all, he became a hunting dog not for the promise of fresh bones, it was more of a pleasant bonus rather than a necessity. Most of his credits were spent on oil for his spaceship and himself, some repairs here and there, bullets and, surprisingly, booze — now unable to fully experience the harmful effects of a few bottles of whiskey a day, Boothill drinks it in the same manner some people chew on their gum. However you and your loyal companionship awoke something within him, something he thought had died many miserable years ago. An urge to care. And it came so naturally to him, too. It was very easy, on a level of subconscious, for him to pick up the habit of buying you food — the one he knows you like, of the highest quality. Or making sure you have an outfit for any occasion in your life and enough space to store them all. Or that all your beauty and health treatments are paid for. Or... and the list goes on and on. Boothill is a man who will respect you for wanting to be independent, sure, but will not shame you for wanting to be provided for.

English is not my native language. So please, if you see any mistakes in grammar, punctuation or spelling, or simply think that something sounds weird, let me know! Ty!

[wisteriainslumber]

ramshackle guest room shenanigans

aka the twst cast receive a room in nrc's beloved prefect's dorm! are they good roommates? well, that's up to yuu to decide!

so far lilia has squared up with grim and class 2A viciously fought in my guest room. good day

CW: cursing, spoilers for draconia family names, you/yuu used interchangeably. i do not know of this thing you call 'consistency'

Riddle

if you're lucky, sometimes a few stray hedgehogs follow their queen over to your place. but only if you're lucky. the heartslabyul student that didn't shut the cage properly may not be so lucky

didn't study? don't let riddle catch that, bc now you're going through the mental version of military drills

really good at being a tutor, garbage at emotional support, but he tries

he brings fresh fruit and flowers sometimes, and books on architecture

yuu has tons of tea stocked in their place because of riddle. he will not come over if there is no tea. he has rules to uphold and also many teacups to give you

sometimes he feels like a health inspector dropping by ur dorm. and no LMAO this dorm is NOTTT getting a clear

seeing him wander around and explore the shroud's gaming console and grims treat dispenser is akin to dropping a victorian boy into the modern world. he is constantly caught off guard from random dings and lights

it shouldn't be considered freaky since heartslabyul has singing flowers and sentient moving flora, but whatever helps him feel better

my malicious yuus love to make a list of all the things that would put a victorian child into a coma and treat it as a to-do list

some point far into the invites, riddle will communicate things he's always wanted to try, like taking personality quizzes during a sleepover

treats it like theres a correct answer and questioning how asking if he thinks about philosophy has an influence on his personality

(get him hooked far enough and this will be your inside bonding joke)

if given the keys: you will find textbooks for your courses, a note-taking guide, and a bunch of stationary from yours truly laying on your living room table

Trey

his hack is baking something before he knocks up on the ramshackle door because what was yuu going to do? take the dessert and slam the door in his face?

i mean they could, but in 8 out of 10 scenarios, trey would probably be invited inside by yuu, meaning he doesn't have to ask (he wouldn't have anyhow)

his confectionary prowess is a weapon and he uses it willy nilly

the friend that leaves at 6AM after your sleepover and makes you feel like a one night stand (he's got responsibilities.. and he misses his own bed, sorry)

sets alarms for you to brush your teeth...

loves how you decorate the place and will be able to notice if you rearranged or added new pieces

grim looooooves to sleep in trey's room and just chill out on him on the reg. it's like hes oozing catnip or something

no one is buying the normal act, right? make him comfortable and you'll see him losing his cool. he's real sassy and catty and honest about things that tick him off, but you need to unlock friendship level 5 to see it

speaking of friendship level 5 at this stage yuu might start getting into prank wars. why? simple curiosity from yuu wanting to know what goes on in trey's head, but they'll say its because they find trey's ideas real funny

trey will prank yuu with the classic whoopee cushion but do not be fooled when he tells you he's bad at pranks... this is a trick to lull you into a false sense of security

real talkative when alone with yuu (and occasionally the ghosts) it's almost like its turned into a sorority depicted in movies.

if given the keys: raids and keeps stock of your bathroom monthly. it is not a choice. he has a clipboard in your bathroom for it.

Cater

oh he camps here to hide from riddle whenever he gets a lower test mark

technically only yuu's rules apply in their dorm so he's freeeee

unless he has to pay in treats, then caycay can absolutely pick up something at the store (if begging trey didn't work that is) first before coming to the dorm

'not photogenic'? no problem, he's an expert. will lay down or hang from the ceiling for the perfect angle. if he has an objective, he'll have a solution (and this includes enlisting the ghosts for help!)

he'll bring his guitar and serenade you as a bribe but if you take super cute candid pics of him playing, he miiiight throw in a small lesson for free <3 but only if they're super duper cool, okay?

this is who you call up to make random videos and skits with. the production is wigs, a colourful wardrobe, one phone, and a dream. hustle hard enough and it can be yuu's side gig

put googly eyes on a bunch of things around the dorm. they're kinda cute?? (this was trey's idea but cater had the balls to execute it)

yuu sets up a cute little bulletin board with envelopes and 'mails' things to their classmates. they can pick up their messages when they come over

cater decorates a 'suggestion box' for the dorm. there's a suspicious amount of requests for a ramshackle dorm uniform in medium size for someone around approximately 176cm..

caycay also likes to joke around and asks for tips when ramshackle guests come over (he calls it 'yuu tax')

will not do it for free, but four (or more!) pairs of hands are better than one for dunking grim into the bath. he won't feel the scratches if they are the bodies of his clones, or so he claims.

if given the keys: get ready for the inside jokes of adopted ramshackle member cater to be true! he'll bring over aesthetic decorations every season, deal?

Ace

always leaving something in the dorm so he can call and later be like 'nooo omgg i guess i HAVEEE to come over now, and since im already there, lets do homework together' and ofc he intends to stay late so now its like 'walking in the DARK back to my dorm?? let me sleep over plssss :(((( your bed looks MAD comfy lets share :)'

nothing is yuu's. that gaming console the shroud brothers gifted them? that's OUR console now

the closet? OUR clothes

grim? mostly yuu's because if ace does anything well its beefing with a fucking cat of all things

ace do be permanently moved in by the first week because for SOME ODD REASON, there's more of his belongings in yuu's place than at his dorms. gee, i wonder how that happened?

you guys craft and buy furniture together. ace contributes by poking fun at the decor in the store and offers his insight (yes, yuu can make him carry everything back)

the friend who is down to do ANYTHING as long as you're together. friendship is magic or something!!

loves sharing the same opinions with yuu and they both have beef with diasomnia student C for wearing the most overpowering woody perfume scent. they love referring to anything pleasant smelling as better than C

(ace is not faring much better he wears axe)

oh yeah the homework never gets done, sometimes it doesn't even get started, but its definitely not ace's fault!! he's just excited to spend time with his bestest friend in the whole wide world! (his words, not yuu's.)

if given the keys to the dorm: stops by EVERY morning to physically drag yuu out of bed for their first class and makes sure their uniform is all in tact and tidy (and eats all your food :( )

Deuce

he would be picking stuff up as he sees it and helping yuu fold or iron some clothing yuu hasn't gotten to yet

he's used to keeping his house clean guys, he will automatically begin cleaning the space

and yes it will always be a little messy bc grim likes to be everywhere, to nap, to feel tall, or watch whatever yuu is doing because he wants a part in the experience too

thinks the mini furniture you have for grim such as step stools, little beds, and tiny cups are the cutest things ever

the cutest duo ever. both tripping on the same tile for the seventh day in a row, both accidentally missing their 3 alarms, and accidentally wearing each others jackets because they were both draped over the chair carelessly before passing out on the couch

surprise, the studying DOES get done when these two are together, but more in small locked-in bursts than a long session

for my multilingual yuus, you will love deuce. a forgotten or unknown word? no prob! deuce can pick up hints and discern exactly what you're talking about/what you mean, even if he doesn't remember the word itself

he's so excited to see your albums and film from the famed ghost camera

genuinely gets along with the ghosties a lot and the ghosts show their obvious disappointment when yuu's guest is not deuce

brings over his laptop because he lets you use his streaming services woo woo. weekly movie dates! he'll pack some some dvds from home the next time he goes on holiday for you

if on the off chance, deuce and yuu scrape together a bike, you'll be learning and going on bike rides together. do not let deuce man the wheel :)

if given the keys: you'll have the handiest tool box in Wonderland as a housewarming gift and helps yuu wrestle grim down to trim his claws

Leona

he let yuu in his room during book 2, so consider this fair payment (wtv u say girl)

invite him over out of your own volition and hes like 'hah? you think i want to be there??'

if the ghosts don't feel like messing with leona, ramshackle is quite peaceful

he will also eat all your food hes like a second grim but less yappy

'drops' a chess piece at your place so you'll come over to savanaclaw & play chess w him

makes outrageous demands when he misses your voice and words

grim does not fight leona for sunspots anymore, he just sneaks into them when he's certain leona is dead asleep (once, yuu found grim curled up on top of leona like he conquered the space)

will complain endlessly and tells yuu to stfu but will give informed answers to their questions

along the question bombing, they land on his necklace and leona talks about the significance of the beading on it

if yuu shows enough interest, he'll be dragged along to do beadwork together but you must absolutely study up (or listen to him) and appreciate the history and culture behind it, or you can forget about this idea all-together, understand?

he sees yuu struggling with homework and hes like 'lmao thats so easy' but he will throw a lil lesson hidden under a comment for you

and he even sits down a bit later to watch you to make sure you're understanding

brings in random shit to your dorm, like throws and coasters and electrical fans to make it more comfortable for himself, but never comes back for them

they just so happen to be in patterns he thinks you might like, so in a backhanded way, it is sort of like a gift

if given the keys: acts so offended that you're giving him the keys to your poor people house but okay, ig if you reaaaally have to give it to someone, then at least you have good judgement, but don't expect anything🙄 (he occasionally leaves gifts on the doorstep like a little house cat)

Ruggie

if you don't know how to clean the stove top or properly do your laundry, this is who you call bc not only does ruggie know how to do all these things, but also know the most convenient, efficient way to do so

gives(?) yuu clothing hangers from leona's closet and teaches you smart storage saving tricks. domestic life lets go

as long as you trade off the chores, then he's all good

rather invested in the furniture crafting process. you never know what more life skills he'll need! and, well, what more jobs he's qualified for shishishi

just let him know anytime you're ready to make a pond because he's good at digging AND gardening. just make sure he leaves any of your pet fish alone

so good at finding anything you've lost/what he's misplaced in your dorm. he's either got fantastic recall or a mental airtag on his belongings, we don't know

he's always chasing that bread so sometimes you see him check in & out like its a hotel, but you'll always share what you've learned and how the day was going by latest, the end of the week

unspoken harmony between the two. its like they're telepathically speaking to each other. they seem to know exactly which spots of the other to cover and never step on nor bump into each other. the mystery shop/mostro have great days when these two are on the same shift

you guys have fun trying out different kinds of tea bags and seeing which one is more worth it

this is how you discover each others favourite snacks and such. it soon dives into lotions and personal pick-me-up items

yes, you can now make gift baskets for each other

btw he will happily accept anything you don't want anymore. he's nothing if an opportunist and who says no to free stuff?

if given the keys: doesn't accept them until you tell him that you expect him at breakfast tomorrow, then he'll drop by if you're cooking :D

Jack

his room is immaculate how dare you invite him into your dusty dorm its bad for his nose

jkjk he miiight help clean and he'll probably gift a few succulents too so he has an excuse to come back to water them or text yuu (he's a bit awkward but he means well!)

febreeze is banned from ramshackle though, it sent jack into a coma when it invaded his senses

the BEST person to randomly bake at home with aside from epel

especially when having to hand-mix anything because money is tight already and between necessities and an electric mixer, the former wins

and he treats it like his god given duty. all that weight lifting training was for this purpose, to make nice things for his friends

sure, you could ask jack to growl at grim to keep him in line but jack might not appreciate it very much. better strike a bargain beforehand

fell off his bed the first night here because it was too small 😭

jack was apologizing profusely for the scare in the middle of the night but yuu suggested dismantling the bed and rebuilding it with deuces help

jack learned a lot about construction that day and likes the magic hammer creation tool yuu has. it'll come in handy and self-proficiency is very respectable

theres a bunch of workout equipment on the first floor because jack didn't want to make a racket if it were in his guest room on the second floor

on warmer days, yuu will happily join jack on his runs, even if they can't catch up, jack will slow down and make a leisurely jog out of it in consideration for a yuu who's not part of the track team

make this a habit and you'll have the healthiest rivalry that ever existed. im talking pokemon swsh gloria & hop energy

if given the keys: hes making your place a home and by that i mean he drops by with practical gifts and helps you carry your groceries and laundry baskets

Azul

when yuu feels a lil silly, they start telling azul that he owes them 350 madol for his water usage at their dorm

says a bunch of flowery words about your design choices, pays very close attention to everything you show him

slowly you realize azul is suggesting renovations ideas that would work for an industrial state, not a dorm (i see you book 3 azul)

genuinely, however, azul is very passionate about interior design and will gladly hand out tips in exchange for your time at mostro :)

if you want to bother him, say random numbers when azul is trying to calculate his expenses. it will get his attention, i guess

you can egg him into playing board games with you. play your cards right and he won't even notice yuu eating the pieces

out-freak him by laughing like a maniac (secretly learned from him) and he'll temporarily pause his scummy advertisement out of confusion

likes to flex his abilities but will clam up if complimented by yuu

accepts suggestions! the leech twins wring him out dry at times, and in those times, he finds his peculiar human legs at your doorstep. his limbs act separate from his own mind, in and out of the sea

can absolutely tell if yuu steps into his room and sits on his chair when he's away because his room is in a VERY meticulous order

doesn't know what to do with this information but all three of his hearts were fluttery and weightless for a short moment

if hes comfy enough to wear more casual clothes over you better call him the prettiest boy ever

if given the keys: accepts them in the most stoic way possible, trying to keep up his act, but hes like running home and giggling and clicking his feet together its so losercore (perhaps he'll drop by more often just to spend time together, its cozy here)

Jade

bringing a heaping load of word salad

and this is in exchange for being the test subject- i mean taste tester to all his cooking concoctions

whenever jade comes over, you know you're about to have the most insane drama from the campus

he likes to swing by after his hikes because yuu is slightly nicer about it (aka jade wont be downright refused). he comes by with a basket full of his findings and just talks and talks and talks for hours

will NEVER track dirt into the dorm and is quick to clean it if so. if yuu calls him dusty and nasty and icky he might play on a pitiful act and insinuate they are cruel for leaving him to the mercy of the elements

almost double the amount of terrariums in his guest room. will assume most of the responsibility for watering and taking care of his plants, but he asked you to take over for one potted plant

it was a plant yuu and him found together, so they didn't feel too suspicious about it

over time the plant grows and grows beautifully, and that is when jade finally chimes in with a 'thank you for taking care of our plant. i'm glad its spores had minimal to no averse effects to you. such are the perks of a user using no magic'

are you saying that plant could've been HARMFUL??? GET BACK HERE.

such a silly lil guy, loves it when you get to paint your nails together and wear whacky face masks

and because he loves to stir shit up, he's weird as fuck about giving you pedicures

theres a downside to this though because his stomach is growling and you literally have to procure enough food to feed an entire army and jades gonna be a bitch about it and pull a sad face like you're not going to let your guest starve, right?? GET OUT.

if given the keys: buys a diy clay charm kit for yuu to make keychains for your matching keys :D

Floyd

bringing a good time

and usually a new activity! sometimes it's just dance, sometimes it's a diy crocheting project, etcetc

sometimes buys way too much random shit cause he thought it was interesting & now you get to help him find uses for it

he just loves to try new things with yuu

and even though he laughs at your failures, he's also the most encouraging art buddy you can ask for

worst influence on the ghosts, enables them and whoever becomes the poor victim of their pranks has floyd to thank for

he loves to cook but not in the 'lets cook together' way, MOVE out of his way, he likes to cook 'the tasty way' and apparently no one but him knows what that is like

airing out ALL (80%) of jade and azul's dirty laundry. no specific motive. he may regard it as a funny story and share it with you, or he wants to tick them off, or some random thing reminded him of the time he bit off a chunk of jade's tail because he kept whacking him in his sleep. oh, don't worry about that last part, he doesn't bite... hard :))

rifles through anything he finds. he likes looking at your picture frames and digging through the drawers and your desk

makes fun of the mismatched themes going on around your dorm.. ahahahahaa what was the thought process for all of this?? the colours clash so much! please tell him you're actually a shrimpy and can see how these colours can blend harmoniously

drops by randomly to 'request' certain layouts or furniture from yuu for no damn reason. for your sanity, only listen to 10% of them

if given the keys: seemingly always misplacing them but he finds them eventually! prefers to break in when you're home anyways because its boring when its just grim pissing himself silly due to his menacing stare

Kalim

bringing snacks over? no, he's bringing a FEAST over (and a metaphorical party)

for some reason now you have a second room for kalim dedicated to all the shit he leaves behind at ramshackle

he keeps bringing you stuff to decorate your dorm with, some other gifts he thinks you'll like, oh and also hes like a mom helping their child move out bc he's giving you every appliance, snack, and cutlery to exist since you mentioned a lack of them Once

kalim comes back for his stuff but forgets to grab it when he leaves and he also happens to leave more bs behind on this trip

you clear a space for dancing bc he cannot stay still he's so excited to view all your furniture and ask about it

he smells amazing. he says he doesn't use perfume, its simply the scent in scarabia from the bakhoor

never ever ever experience dehydration ever again you will be drinking so much water because kalim talks forever and moves around endlessly just watching him gives you sympathy thirst (and +1000 respect for jamil)

LOVES sleepovers so much. due to how often he shuts the alarm in his sleep, kalim cannot be relied upon to wake up first. so you will have to set that alarm

talks in his sleep. he keeps addressing his uncle and auntie and asking them if they are lonely and that kalim will be their friend. yuu would normally brush it off but its getting concerning when kalim mentions a bunch of different locations and asking to go home and begging to not to be left alone

usually quiets down some when he can cuddle his pillow or grim. makes him feel safer

if given the keys: WHAT ARE BOUNDARIES. hes breaking in as often as he can to do everything and anything under the sun or just to say hi.

Jamil

ace's just dance high score stuck on your console? no problem, call up your bestie jamil and he's gonna clear the entire scoreboard

(jk do not do this, call jamil up to pamper him instead)

you leave a pregnancy pillow in his spare room as a joke but hes never leaving again because he got such good sleep that night he may reassess murdering his classmates that day

its like a breath of fresh air for him because the place is so cozy. no more bright chandeliers, no more high columns, no more gold. dont take it personally if jamil seems lethargic every time he comes over, take it as a compliment because he feels comfy enough here

prepare to be the one to kill bugs before jamil finds them, lest you end up having to rescue him from atop your kitchen island (he wouldn't dare set fire to your dorm)

very happy if you install a big mirror in his guest room because he will use that to dance to his hearts content uninterrupted

finds so much peace in sharpening your DULL ASS kitchen knives oml, no wonder you're having so much trouble with it. here, use this tool, and angle it away from yourself. grim, get off the counter, the shinies are not worth the risk.

but if you find the noise from the sharpening a sensory nightmare, jamil will help you. he likes to wear a very malicious look of evil intent on his face doing so but he's unaware of it (he needs another night with the loopy pillow bc hes relapsed into debating murder again)

unintentionally the funniest person ever when he's going OFF on his classmates to yuu. insults you've never heard of before, comparisons that would wound the most steel hearts. he's not sparing a single soul and that is thanks to yuu's unshakable discretion

if jamil is over often enough, he might start leaving his spare hair care in the bathrooms, which means yuu has the secret to his perfect hair?! (ofc yuu would never use it without permission. they're confused when its just like two hair oils though. jamil was blessed with his namesake at birth, ig)

if given the keys: on the rare occasions he can drop by, he leaves a note informing yuu of his presence and a reminder for an oil change for the lock. one time, you received a pretty package from najima (she brought yuu a nice shawl!)

Vil

its like if a whole flower field grew in your dorm overnight because vil smells SO GOOD

not an overpowering scent, the magic of his presence creates miracles, i dont make the rules

mother hen in which he comes by with so much fruit and random healthy snacks he bought in bulk for pomefiore and sets up a nice little mirror that clashes with the rest of yuu's room because of how ornate it is

also the kind of mom in which he tells you to clean all the time and makes a fuss over a mess on the countertop

crazy dishwasher. once he gets those rubber gloves on he's unstoppable

never lets anyone see him when he's just woken up. he is a literal bog monster. his eyes are crazed, his hair is everywhere, there's drool on his cheek and pillow, he's disoriented and frothing with hate

he's stuck looking chronically pissed or anxious until the process of his morning routine wakes him up properly and he's feeling alive again. everyone will be none the wiser

if yuu breaks in without knocking they'd believe vil had overblotted once more. they had to swear on grim and sign an NDA that they will never mention what they saw in their guest room, but they didn't even care?! they seemed almost relieved to see vil in, his opinion, most atrocious state

it was like vil had a second rook during that conversation, until his rook showed up and joined in on the praises and reassurance, finishing eerily that he would strike down the ones who know vil's secret upon his request

luckily it never got to that part, but yuu had a stronger comradery with vil moving forward

if given the keys: grim will never know a day of peace because if vil catches him unbrushed with his nails not trimmed, he's getting a full grooming and a lecture about proper maintenance to both grim AND yuu. but mostly grim. (listen, you tried, but grim likes to sink his claws into you when the clippers come out and they hurt)

Rook

prepare to snap your fingers because every word that exits this man's mouth can be considered slam poetry

he's like a crow in a sense that you find a variety of trinkets on your windowsil accompanied by a nice note about why it reminded rook of yuu and (sometimes) how he acquired it

yuu's room is on the third floor

the ghosts are mixed about him. some of them dote on rook and some of them think him peculiar, but have no issues yet, and some seem to always have important errands to do when he's over

yuu's learned about his stalker collection album. thats basically his biggest secret if you ask rook, so he's no longer shy about it in ramshackle. he looks way too happy to not have to cover his wallpaper that yuu swallowed their request upon seeing his smile

would rejoice if you'd be open to be a model/muse for him. he has many words and various sketches to be made! (yuu's only condition was no pictures because rook once took a close up of their ear and that was enough for them)

yuu hangs his sketches & poems up on their fridge to rook's embarrassment

rook was ecstatic to see yuu took an interest in archery, saying it will help them hone their picture taking accuracy and physical strength

yuu has a long way to go before they have the strength to draw rooks bow though.. they felt that attempt for days

also someone whos down for spontaneity as much as hes down for an itinerary. sometimes he does have to tone down his personality and interests but since yuu's seen basically everything he really really shines!

and um... since you know his deepest darkest secrets, it's only natural that rook knows your routine down to the tiniest detail. no, you never told him anything, but thats just the devotion of his gratitude!

match his freak by rambling about your interests. he'll be so so so invested

hes a boy filled with love for others and loves love, and his musings really do touch the heart. he helps yuu see the beauty and whimsy in the world they so mysteriously landed upon

if given the keys: this was a request for him to use the door instead of climbing up the windows

Epel

sebek complained about his skin being dry like one time and epel was already on it. all that personal care he received from vil did enter his head and now he's using the knowledge

next first year sleepover, they had a self care night, face masks, little bath robes, the whole shebang

epel's face roller was a personal favourite that night

yuu gave epel permission to raid their closet and it was such a dream for epel. your closet is full of different aesthetics and epel truly sees how yuu's personality perfectly matches each of the pieces

(with permission) borrows a few pieces or accessories to casually wear. as long as they're put together with care, vil has no complaints about it

grateful that yuu is patient with his speaking pace when hes leaned back into his accent, and for my multilingual yuus, he will share the same in kind

if not multilingual, its a lawless land for yuu and epel to learn how to speak in different accents and switch them up mid-convo

you'll never have a shortage of apple juice or homemade pies ever again bc epels family ships their juice to the dorm and epel knows the recipe so the first years make pies every few months

epel will sometimes use speaker phone or invite you to his family conversations, because more is always better!

it gets to the point where sometimes grandma marja calls epel just to talk to yuu and dote on grim.. haha.. let the turf wars begin

if given the keys: (if alone) barges in with no ceremony just to cause a ruckus because yuu is literally shouting epel's name with glee when he comes by. grim is so tired of those two

Idia

green flag in which he understands and respect boundaries so much

mobility accommodations are ready to be deployed before you have time to think about it

prints labels for you guys to put ur name on all of your stuff if it makes it easier for you to organize

most polite roomie you'll have he puts everything back where he found it (more for fear of getting in trouble than out of the goodness of his heart)

he even implements fun little signs on the doorknobs of each room that you can flip if you're open to company or want to be left alone. y'know, like a hotel

you'll always have the most updated version of your games on the console the shroud brothers gave you

and ofc because yuu is nice they let idia have his personal controller in the guest room that he decorated himself

y'all set up a nice little quiet space filled with fairy lights and books and a blanket roof for soul recovery

catching idia in-person at all is a cryptid sighting but if you do and he's humming and singing little songs to himself, it means he's feeling comfortable in your space. good job!

the chore/to-do list is categorized into quests and related equipment, which really helps the daunting task feel more exciting

life is so much more whimsical pretending their scary situation is an rpg. but seriously, yuu has some serious facial blindness, what do you mean you can't recognize your own classmates? why are you referring to them like 'scarabia student B'? he has a name!! yuus got idia stressed

for your own sake, do not enable idia when he talks about (styx's) showering machines

if given the keys: he might not ever use them to enter your dorm alone out of respect for you but he guards them with his life and know that if its ever an emergency, idia is the best person you could've left your spare key with (yes he will help you delete your browsing history and destroy your phone if you die)

Ortho

always making infrastructure and renovation suggestions because he forgets he's not talking to idia, who can DIY whatever he wants

and most people do not have the coins to spare when it comes to renovation

he's trying to yuu help out because he's scanned the level of dust in this dorm, and it certainly has long-term harmful effects

totally okay with you trying out new stickers on him, just dont stick them over his cooling fans and heat vents

you're free to play dress-up with him as long as it's traded off and idia gets to pet, brush, or dress up grim himself (he'll go as a reward or a punishment depending on yuu's mood that day)

fascinated by hair and coloured contacts and jewelry, and the concept of painting nails. rip ortho you would've loved barbie

at least no one has to worry about forgetting something someone has said bc ortho is ALWAYS recording. useful function or blackmail material? it's up for debate

don't try to give him paper and crayons if hes bored bc he'll take requests & be an art generator and now sebek is lecturing ortho about the importance of creativity and art (AS HE SHOULD)

if he catches grim or yuu complaining about the fear of the dark or spiders or anything, he'll take it upon himself to be a fearsome guard dog aka you're going to be handed a cosmically charged spider killer (it might also kill more than spiders.. like walls, and animals, and small children.. maybe mildly burn a bird-brained adult if yuu feels inclined to test it)

is SOOOO happy to be the voice recording for yuu's alarm clock. he has so many morning greeting lines recorded in there and he's very proud that grim likes it (probably the most gentle wake up calls he gets apart from yours)

if given the keys: he will show up with cleaning equipment attached, and start vacuuming like your own personal little roomba

Malleus

did someone order an extra tall yappucino?

by having malleus over, by proxy, the rest of the diasomnifam will be over too

unintentionally is setting fae traps around the place. just uh, dont walk up any new staircases in ramshackle

the ghosts kindly remind yuu to cover their mirrors at night, but if the covers fall off, malleus will help out :)

almost daily, the soppy wet fairy knocks up on your door. he smells like dirt and outside

if you ever wonder how its like to wake up to a sleep paralysis demon, mal will give you a demo because you'll wake up in the middle of the night to these glowing green eyes outside your window all cause he wanted to show you a cool rock he found

yuu will close the window blinds from time to time and will only accept if malleus knocks on the door like a regular person

speaks in riddles, you can't tell if he's subtly threatening you, thinks ur funny, warning you, or complimenting you

also his laughter scares the ghosts in ramshackle and they go into hiding. rip yuu's moral support

wanted to make pottery with yuu but they don't have a wheel so malleus pulled up with knives and logs

LOOOVES woodcrafting but you better hound his ass bc theres no way you can afford the repair if he accidentally breaks your shit bc he can't tell a pinch from a punch

his room in here will never be decorated. he'd appreciate if yuu gave him the most dusty, decrepit ass room too and he'll sit there in silence looking at the cobwebs and cracks and inhaling mold & write poetry about it. he cant wait to tell you about his reflections on age, beauty, and time

and since mal likes that room so much, yuu will leave it alone. besides, the outside of ramshackle is cursed to never grow grass or trees or anything so if malleus is tired of the room he has the entire eerie dorm ground to explore

if given the keys: you're giving him access to your home, which = a permanent invite over, which means you are 1. married, congrats and 2. will be asked all the time if you'll accept his blessings. user discretion is advised

Lilia

WHEREVER LILIA GOES, HIS SONS FOLLOW

fuck it, free music

every word is a trigger for a song. you don't know whether you want a room with better acoustics or a soundproof dorm by the time he's done

if you have ANY ailment whatsoever, lilia knows so much random ass traditional remedies, sometimes they seem unconventional, but you'll be feeling so powered up after

most receptive to playing a bit. grim wants to snitch on yuu for waterboarding him (he was splashed with a little bit of water), then lilia will play along and be like shame on you, you have to look after your dorm students

sleepovers look like.. reenacting entire musicals together! you guys swap roles halfway through and also the ghosts came by to be ensemble and that one light that constantly flickers is finally useful for this performance!

lilia is one of the best gossip buddies to ever have he's so reactive but the caveat is that he's incredibly perceptive and can absolutely detect denial

his stuff is EVERYWHERE. if you enter his room you cannot see the floor. random trinkets are in his drawers, empty containers everywhere for him to put more trinkets inside (forgets about them and only accumulates more containers), and ESPECIALLY sensitive documents misplaced and his student ID was lost underneath his ramshackle bed for MONTHS

he's confident that his things are safe here, but please lilia, yuu does not want to be responsible for princess meleanor's mourning locket

request with your life that if he wants to bring snacks over, have them store-bought 'in case of allergies'. your stomach will thank you

you might start getting a weird compelling feeling to open the door in the middle of the night... but it's just lilia on the other side, no need to worry!! .. i think

if given the keys: he will never use them. only if you or the ghosts invite him inside, will he visit. those keys are a symbol of your friendship and he'll happily give yuu health & prosperity blessings upon their request (don't know why they want to bless their study materials, but wtv!)

Silver

at some point, the birds & squirrels will start visiting your home and leaving random trinkets and nice leaves

out of their own volition or at silver's request? who knows

either way, a bird feeder will be set up on one of ramshackle's trees due to his frequent visits

sometimes yuu gets jumpscared because theres some random man passed out on the porch but then they realize its a pretty boy and that pretty boy is their classmate

brings oranges and other assorted fruit for you because he cares about your vitamin intake <3

but then he keeps bringing gift baskets EVERY time yuu invites him over (courtesy gifts, of course!) they're nice, but his company is the most precious gift they'll get :D

very kind, greets every ghost there, holds open doors and fetches your things for you, tries to take interest in the things you're interested in, and constantly gives a heads-up if he catches himself dozing off (sometimes he'll make this known when its too late, his head loudly 'thunk'ing on whatever surface he's on. he's quite the durable one..)

having a conversation with him is so head reeling you cannot tell WHAT he is going to say. it starts with sweet stories about how him and sebek go to the dentist together, to him revealing his uses the suds from his shampoo to wash his entire body, to how he wrestled a bear and tended to his crops for a whole season until his father came back

truly a fever dream of a character for a yuu that doesn't know the connection between the vanrouges

grim complained ONE TIME about the lack of heating and now silver is chopping down firewood and teaching yuu about survival and now hes talking about emergency water sources and hypothermia and its so damn graphic you'll think these are personal anecdotes or something...

if given the keys: he guards these with his life. it is a precious artifact to him. he doesn't invite himself into your home but will only do so if you ask him to fetch something for you

Sebek

tiniest kitten sneeze you could ever possibly imagine and hes SOOO embarrassed by it.

the first years hear it for the first time and they're all like DAMNNN. sebek blames the dusty musty building

god forbid you get sick ONE time because if sebek gets ear of this AND has the keys to your dorm, he's delivering nutrient-rich foods to your door every day

and this is only because lord malleus would be extremely inconvenienced if you passed, so stay healthy, goddammit >:(

his housewarming gift to you is a picture frame to hang on your wall. a very grandiose one. a portrait of malleus hangs in it, but you could change it with a max of like four objections from sebek

yuu can be trusted with knowing sebek can't drink black coffee bc they're not a blabbermouth like azul

grim and sebek are (slightly) placated by having book club debates. illiterate v well-read battle of wits

they help tire the other out and competing with sebek really does help grim step up his study game. good for yuu!

sebek let yuu borrow his books about briar valley since they showed some curiosity, and in turn, yuu gifts him many books that he will annotate and give back. he was v emotional about the 'villain' being framed since she was born differently. he did absolutely think the crashout was justified because he would also lose it if a bunch of humans rallied on him for being green

triple checking the safety of all yuu's furniture and is outraged that the stairs 'have a tendency' to collapse. he had a lot of say about this but ig it can be roughly translated to 'you can stay in diasomnia', but if anyone asks, sebek did NOT invite you. you simply happened upon the doorstep and he had enough of a heart to take yuu in.

if given the keys: if you had to hear the national anthem at your school every morning, this is what happens. dutifully visits yuu to assure they are presentable and on time, just think about the message you're sending!

Bonus: Crowley

knocking on the door is for show. he doesnt wait for an answer because he comes in anyway

comes in every once in a while to complain about his 'paperwork', his coworkers, the students, ambrose, and then sulk for comfort

"My hatchlings are all so violent! It's so hard being the headmaster with no support. if only there were a student who could invite their lovely headmaster out for some good old bonding time-"

"Can I have a stove ventilator please?"

"Oh would you look at the time, I have a meeting!"

never stays long enough to be forced to use the cold water, or get stuck in one of the rooms due to the broken doors, or fall through the staircase because of one worn-down plank (AGAIN)

oh yeah he has the audacity to remark that ur dorm is dusty too

once drank from the bird bath. it was photographed on the ghost camera. yuu got their stove ventilator that day for their silence

if given the keys: happiest person on the planet. his (kidnapped) child wants to spend time with him :DDD takes it as an invitation to barge in to spoil grim with treats and have dinner together when they can (crowley already has the keys, but this is special to him)

[woso-dreamzzz]

Introductions II

Patri Guijarro x Hardersson!Reader

Natalia Guijarro (OC) x Hardersson!Reader

Part of The Big Adventures Universe

Summary: You meet Patri

"Relax," Talia whispers," It's going to be okay."

Her words did nothing to quell your anxiety, leg still bouncing as you sit in a hole in the wall café at the very back.

It's the first time you're meeting Patri, Talia's older cousin. She used to play with Alexia and your Tia Tana but you've never actually met her before. You've had her shirts too. You've just never seen her in person.

You wouldn't normally be this nervous but this is Talia's cousin, her absolute favourite cousin who might as well be her sister. When Talia's parents moved from Mallorca with her, Patri came over frequently.

Talia had grown up with Patri. Patri was important her.

You need to make a good impression, hence why you're so anxious about it.

Patri was important to Talia and Talia was important to you.

"Okay," You say, releasing a long breath as you reach for Talia's hand.

She squeezes yours in her own, bringing it up to press a soft kiss to the back of your hand.

You smile at her, a little awkwardly but still grateful for her comfort.

"Patri's not scary," Talia assures you," She's just Patri."

Strangely, that doesn't fill you with much hope.

Patri Guijarro, even retired as she is, looks fairly scary as she steps into the café. She catches sight of Natalia quickly, who stands up to greet her with a hug.

You stand, wiping the sweat off your hands. "Hola," You say. You offer her your hand to shake.

Patri takes it and you give her a firm handshake like how your Momma always taught you.

Patri watches you, eyes narrowing briefly before she releases you and glances at Talia. "Strong hands," She comments, giving your girlfriend a meaningful look that you don't quite understand. She looks back at you again.

"So," Patri says," I heard that you speak a lot of languages."

"I do."

"Can you teach me your favourite swear words?"

The ice successfully breaks after that and you relax into the simple flow of conversation between the three of you.

Now that she's up close, you can see the similarities between Patri and your girlfriend. They've got the same kind of features with slight differences. They're very clearly related though from the way their eyes spark to the way they gesture as they speak to the exact same way they push their hair out of their faces.

It's sweet and you can't help but smile as Talia tries to shove a cupcake down Patri's throat, who was just in the middle of telling a story about something embarrassing Natalia did as a small child.

"So," Patri says to you when Talia goes off to the toilet," I suppose this is the part where I tell you that if you hurt her I'll hurt you?"

You freeze suddenly.

That's what you've actually been waiting for. You should have known that this would happen. Credit to Patri though for lulling you into a false sense of security for nearly an hour now.

You throat bobs and you take a small sip of your water.

"Er..." You're not quite sure what to say to that. "If you want?"

Patri looks very stern now and she leans over to the table to you.

Her mouth opens.

Her hand comes up...to pat you on the shoulder.

She laughs.

"That was the plan, you know? To scare you into never breaking Nat's heart but you...you're way too sweet for that. I can't imagine you even hurting a fly."

You weren't quite sure if that was a compliment or not. You were going to take it as one though otherwise you weren't sure what you were meant to say to that.

"Thanks?"

Patri grins at you. "No problem. Now, Nat's probably touching up her makeup, do you want to here about the time she got stuck in a bin?"

When Talia returns from the toilet, she comes back to the table to see both you and Patri giggling with each other.

Giggles that turn into full blown laughter when she sits back down.

"What?" She asks," What is it?"

Patri is laughing properly now, wiping tears from her eyes and clutching her stomach as you bite at your lip to stifle your own, going out of your way to not look her in the eye unless you burst into laughter again.

"I'm serious," She says," Have I got something on me?"

"Don't worry, Talia," You reply, reaching out to gently cover her hand with your own," It's nothing."

"It's clearly not nothing!"

Patri snickers. "So long as you think getting stuck in the bin as nothing."

"I told you to stop telling that story!"

[rhiannonsknife]

Hiya!! I thought since a lot of your anons loved Rhiannon with a breeding kink I would raise you to a higher pedestal! I give you….obssesive wife Rhiannon who is absolutely obsessed with getting you pregnant. She goes to all lengths….checking your calendar for ovulation days, sneaking in your vitamins for strength, making sure you eat all and healthy. She’s extra cautious. I imagine her to be the type that isn’t fond of children in general, but when she thinks of her baby, your baby immediately she’s willing to do late night feeds and nappie changes.

But Rhiannon who does all these things without you knowing? If that makes sense? She picks a date where she knows your ovulating. Buying you flowers on the way home and having to keep them from getting smushed on the tube. Having a list of how many people she’d like to throttle by the end of the trip. Coming home early to strewn flower petals on the floor, the bed, light the fireplace. Candles that she eagerly secured (she wants you pregnant but dead) she makes dinner or orders expensive take out. She takes out the essential oils you like to give you a back rub. All these are a false sense of security for you. To make you more submissive and willing to let her breed you. Not that you’re not willing, you are, you just haven’t had time to do the act.

But Rhiannon who does all this and when she finally has you where she wants, she’s begging, pleading for you to let her breed you. Saying she wants a baby, she’ll do anything and everything for you. How cute a little wife you’ll be pregnant with her baby. All these things.

But obsessive unhinged Rhiannon who purposely puts pills into your drink that make you extra salacious just for her. 🤭 I hope all these thoughts sit well with you! I have been here since your first Jackie post and have thought very highly of you! I know you must be bustling with anons, but would you be keen on letting me be 🖋️ anon?

lord have mercy…we must stay focused!! thank you for sharing your thoughts 🖋️ anon!! nsfw content. mdni!

rhiannon’s been planning this for weeks.

usually, the only times she’s as structured about something, it’s for taking a life, not -well- creating one. it all started with her obsessively tracking your calendar, paying extra attention to those little marks that indicated your ovulation days. suddenly, she’s an expert on your cycle.

vitamins are slipped into your morning smoothies and she’s extra insistent that you eat more greens, and every now and then, she sneaks into her phone to research the best fertility-boosting recipes when she knows you’re not looking.

rhiannon doesn’t tell you any of this, obviously.

the truth is, she doesn’t care about children in general. she never has. other people’s kids are loud and require more patience and attention than she’s ever had. but the idea of your baby? a little person who’s part you, part her? rhiannon can’t stop thinking about it.

it’s obsessive, maybe even a little unhinged, but that’s rhiannon for you: fiercely devoted, insanely unpredictable, and completely consumed by the idea of loving you and the life she wants to build with you.

and tonight? tonight is the culmination of all her planning.

the flowers are the first sign: you come home to the sight of her holding a massive bouquet of your favorite flowers, the stems slightly crushed from her efforts to keep them safe on the tube.

you barely have time to take off your shoes before she presses it into your hands and kisses you. “hi” she murmurs against your mouth, hands sneaking to your waist already.

“hi,” you greet, raising an eyebrow as you take in the sight. “what’s the occasion?”

“do i need a reason to spoil you?” rhiannon counters instantly, dragging you inside by the arm. “dinner’s on the table,” she adds, wrapping an arm around your hip and guiding you toward the dining room.

“you cooked?” you ask, half-joking.

she grins. “don’t push your luck now. i ordered from that fancy italian place you like”

rhiannon may not be the culinary genius of the relationship, but she knows your favorite meals and goes out of her way to make you feel special. still, the extravagance tonight feels almost too calculated.

dinner progresses perfectly, with rhiannon’s attention unwavering. she pours your wine, makes you laugh, and touches you constantly; light brushes of her fingers against yours, a hand on your thigh, a kiss at the corner of your mouth…by the time she leads you upstairs, her fingers laced with yours, your earlier suspicion is all but forgotten.

well, that’s until you see the state of the bedroom: it’s just as carefully prepared as the rest of the house, with candles lit and petals scattered across the bed in what would’ve been a comically cliché display under different circumstances.

“alright,” you say, turning to face her as she closes the door behind you. “what’s all this for, rhee? did you rob a bank or something?” (not that it would surprise you, given her murderous tendencies)

her laugh is low and husky, and she steps closer, pulling you into her arms. “can’t i just want to make you feel good?”

her lips brush against your neck as she speaks, and you feel yourself relax in her touch. you don’t know about the vitamins, or the research, or the way she’s been meticulously planning this exact night down to the smallest detail. all you know is that her touch feels too good to question any of this.

“lay down,” rhiannon murmurs, reluctant pulling back to reach for the bottle of oil she’d hidden in the nightstand. “you’ve been so stressed lately…let me take care of you…”

her hands are warm, yet firm as they move across your back, kneading away the tension you didn’t even realize you’d been holding all this time.

“you’re being awfully sweet tonight,” you tease, though your voice is muffled by the pillow beneath your cheek and cut off my a soft groan as her oiled up fingers work on a knot in your lower back.

“just in a good mood,” she replies casually, though there’s an edge of truth in her words. she is in a good mood, but not for the reasons you think. it’s because tonight is the night she’s going to make this happen.

the first time she says it, you genuinely think you’re hearing things.

rhiannon is on top of you, her mouth kissing and sucking on your neck while her hips roll at a gentle pace. you’ve got both arms draped over her neck to hold her close as she moves.

she nudges your earlobe with her nose, momentarily slowing down her thrusts. “i want a baby” she breathes, relishing in the way your breath catches when the words sink in.

you drop your hand to rhiannon’s cheek so she’s looking down at you and tilt your head. “w-what?”

rhiannon smiles. even though she’s breathless, holding back from cumming too soon already, she’s pleased with herself and the element of surprise. “i want a baby” she repeats between a groan as you accidentally squeeze her in tighter. as if that alone (plus all the work she’s done for you today) isn’t enough yet, rhiannon picks up the pace again, buries her face in the crook of your neck, and starts pleading: “please. you already know i’d- fuck- do anything for you” rhiannon pants, your fingers tightening against her skin. each of her thrusts goes right against your g-spot, making it hard to focus on what she’s actually proposing here.

it takes surprisingly little effort to convince you. perhaps it’s her timing and the fact that she’s bringing this possibility up whilst she’s already buried to the hilt. or that you can’t help but want her to, nearly gushing at the thought. either way, this and her ragged pleads to fuck you raw are enough to make up your mind.

the first time rhiannon sinks into you like that, she literally whines, her fingers tightening their hold on you so that she won’t start humping into you uselessly.

nothing, not even the hours she spent by herself, imagining you bare around her, could compare to the real deal.

“oh my god” she groans, her lashes fluttering as she holds onto your thighs, keeping you nice and open for her. “oh my god, you feel so good”

obviously rhiannon isn’t the only one affected: you can literally feel her twitch, already leaking from just being inside you, and that sensation alone is enough for your eyes to roll back in your head.

“fuck, rhee” you manage as she slides all the way inside easily; you’re embarrassingly wet, though rhiannon hardly notices.

any coherent thoughts go straight out of the window anyway the moment rhiannon starts moving, thrusting into you until the only sound echoing through the room is the one of skin slapping against skin, coming from between your thighs.

now, i know i’ve said it in this post already, but rhiannon, who cums so fast :((

she’s been fantasizing about this for so long, touching herself and imagining her hand as your bare cunt surrounding her, but truly nothing compares to this.

she lasts mere minutes before she tenses and releases.

rhiannon tries to hold back, she really does, but fails miserably. she had all these plans; positions to try, making you beg for her cum, watching it drip from you…none of it matters when she cums deep inside for the first time, crying out against your neck as she fills you up.

shoutout to the one person who knows me irl and somehow found this account. if you’re reading this: GET OUT. (honestly, writing this feels like the ultimate walk of shame, but hey, i gotta do what i gotta do to keep the anons happy 🤗)

[lxvvie]

Couples shit with Simon Riley, Modern Harefare edition:

I've talked about Simon with Pup (the dog) and Spectre (the cat), but what if the family pet was... a rabbit?

Meet Thumper, the cutest, most adorable Lop... that Simon wasn't expecting. At all. When you said you were getting a Lop, he didn't think it'd be a... a bloody rabbit. And thus a war in your home was started, one of epically adorable proportions.

Simon is convinced Thumper wants him dead. For a variety of reasons. Reasons that include waking him up at the ass-crack of dawn by sprinting across the bed and catching him mid-snore when Thumper hits his head. Yeah, luv, the bloody rabbit wants him dead.

It's that and catching Thumper nibbling on his clothes with no remorse. Because he wants him dead.

And it's also Thumper... thumping his way through life, throwing adorable tantrums because "I just gave you some lettuce, Thumps," or, "Can't eat my biscuit, mate." It's fuckin' psychological warfare, the things Thumper does to him, luv. What's so bloody funny?

Perhaps you've noticed that whenever Simon is scrolling on his yee-yee ass phone, Thumper jumps on him and knocks the phone out of his hand. With no remorse. Because he wants Simon dead. Alright, mate, if it's a bloody war you want, it's a bloody war you get.

Simon retaliating in kind, responding with psychological warfare of his own. "Gotta disarm my opponent," is what your soldier says, as he gives Thumper his favorite treat: a banana. All to throw Thumper off his game. Know what else Simon does?

Clean Thump's hutch when it's his turn. He makes it nice and comfortable again all so his bunny child can rage and thump and... mess it up in rebellion. Again. Simon can't help but be amused and chuckle. The tide's turning in his favor, sweetheart.

Whenever Thumper jumps on him, Simon... pets him. To throw him off his game of course. No thumping formed against him shall prosper. Sometimes. And when Thumper does thump in rebellion, Simon gently admonishes him like the honey bunny dad that he is. No, Simon, you're absolutely not laughing at him giving your pet rabbit a whole-ass lecture.

Bond with Distract Thumper with the game on the telly. Goes good for Simon 'cause it puts his thumping to good use whenever they miss a goal. Yeah, he feels the same way, Thumps. Now Johnny has bragging rights for the next couple of days or so until his team inevitably lets him down again.

Let Thumper follow him throughout the house for the most part. You have to keep your friends close and your enemies closer, luv.

And you know the most effective war tactic Simon has at his disposal? Cuddles. Because Thumper loves his cuddles and how Simon picks him up and nestles him in his arms. Better yet, it's when he lightly scratches Thump's head, lulling him into a false sense of security... and sleep. "Think I've won this war, sweetheart," Simon says as Thumper rests comfortably in his arms. Yeah, Simon, you sure did. And when you suggest putting your bunny baby down so he can nap some more, Simon looks at you as if you had two heads.

[tleeaves]

Having so many thoughts about how the casting of Tom Blyth as a conventionally attractive man and his changing looks throughout the film actually demonstrate how much the directors intended for him not to be thirsted over -- and what thirsting over him at this point says about the audience.

I mean, if you're given a pretty face, like Coryo is said to have also in the books, you can get away with a lot because not many people are quick to scorn you. It's the fault of Greek philosophy most likely, but it's been thought for so long that physical beauty equates moral and ethical soundness. He has beautiful, absolutely gorgeous curls in the first two parts of the movie (and book), he's explicitly described as lovely and pretty, and many of the women in his life trust him until he reveals his motivations at the end.

The removing of the curls, I think, was not just about the military. It was about removing some of that beautiful mask and costume Coryo moves through the world in, chipping away, so that people began to see just how corrupt he was when they weren't blinded by his charms and he got too caught up after thinking he had their unwavering trust.

Coryo is the games. He makes himself a mystery wrapped in pretty things, surrounded by pretty people, to lure others in and distract from the snake he is underneath. Literally from Shakespeare's Macbeth "serpent 'neath the flower" (paraphrasing, I can't remember the precise wording for underneath and what not). The presence of roses on his character is even more fitting then, not just to disguise the scent of blood, poison, and mouth sores later on, but to give people a false sense of security, to please them, to charm them so they don't notice the snake coiling around them and preparing to bite.

Just like the characters, when the audience thirsts over this younger Snow, they are falling right into a trap. He does not love, he wants the control over people. He enjoys the manipulation. He would sooner kill you to protect himself no matter if you're his lover. The directors, Collins herself too, they're laughing or perhaps just wearily sighing over an audience that does not understand when they are being targeted. Snow wants to be admired. When an audience admires him and overlooks all the bad, it's a commentary about them and the way our society favours beauty over goodness. The way some will roll over and offer their necks to the knife just because it wears a pretty face and it manipulated them into sympathising.

Snow is dangerous. The thirst traps and edits, good as they are for a handsome man like Tom Blyth, are exactly what the Capitol would do for Snow. What he would encourage in theory. He's the snake underneath the flowers. And the audience of both the games and The Hunger Games franchise, is once again ignorant to what their behaviour means. Successful manipulation of a group.

How scary would that be if it happened in real politics with slightly different methods?

[tokoyamisstuff]

could you do headcanons for Alucard and Anderson both wooing reader?

💀R.I.P. bae good luck with that

General Yandere warning bc there's no way in hell this would go about normally.

What might've started as part of their rivalry, winning you over soon turned into a full-blown obsession for both of them.

They'll go about it in completely different ways, though, with Alucard relying on his intimidating power, while Anderson resorts to manipulation tactics.

For Alucard this whole thing is more of a pastime, an entertaining game he is confident to win. Anderson on the other hand is in absolute denial of his feelings and keeps telling himself that he merely wants to protect you.

The vampire will be very upfront about his affection, showcasing his abilities to subtly threaten you into submission. Because he will get what he wants...one way or another. But you needn't be afraid - if you give yourself to him, his power is also yours.

The Priest is very careful how he presents himself, wanting you to see him from his best side only. He'll hide the deranged parts of himself in order to give you a false sense of trust and security. It's hard to believe a man this kind and considerate could be so twisted underneath.

Iscariot would 100% support his aspirations to 'save' an innocent soul from eternal damnation, especially after he reveals that their church's arch nemesis is keeping you against your will.

Integra would definetly look right past any of Alucard's lies and would not tolerate this kind of behavior against a civilian. Even if you were to comply, she'd probably see the toxicity of this insane power imbalance. So he'll try to keep it a secret from his boss, since her influence would certainly be a hindrance.

Sadly neither of those two men care much about your opinion on that matter. Anderson claims you don't know what's best for you and Alucard just firmly believes you'll come around eventually.

For a while this will continue as a circle of kidnapping you from one another, accompanied with a lot of bloodshed on both sides, dragging members of their respective organizations into their mess and sacrificing them without second thought.

Every time those two clash it'll turn more into peacocking honestly, they care more about showing off and making a great impression on you than actually fighting each other.

However they both would stop at nothing to satiate their desperate need for you, so it's inevitable that at some point one of them has to die in order to finally have you for themselves - let's just hope you've made peace staying with whoever wins.

[mythicmanuscripts]

hello!!! love your blog!!

Could you talk about what intense subdrop is like with Aegon, Aemond, and Jace? like what makes them drop, and what happened/how it went the first time it happened in front of the reader? with lots of soft aftercare? thank you!!!

Of course I can anon! Absolutely. So I definitely have spoken vaguely about subdrop with all of the main three but I don't think I've ever sort of just given overviews of it? So for each of them I'm gonna write a bit about what I think their general triggers for subdrop would be and what they'd need, etc cause then I think we can have a really nice groundwork to discuss some of the stuff further. So let me know if any of these thoughts inspire you! Or you can always apply them to an AU as well.

I'm also happy to share or hear thoughts about other characters for this as well :)) Anyway, there's some non-graphic NSFW content in this answer so if that's not your think then feel free to scroll on by otherwise, enjoy!

AEMOND:

So with Aemond I think he'd only experience subdrop a few months into your relationship, when you've already had sex multiple times and he's already showing his submissive side quite a bit. I think it would only start then because until he reached that level of comfort he always had his walls up?

Even though you were praising him and commanding him and giving him aftercare, he still stayed guarded. Make no mistake, he loved every single moment with you, but despite knowing that his brain still takes longer to catch up to the fact that he's actually allowed to properly let go. As a result, you get lulled into a false sense of security where it seems like the only aftercare Aemond wants is for you to help clean him up and dress him and cuddle a little bit. He was always up and about within an hour after the scene had ended. But this wasn't because he was fully recovered, this was because he had never let himself fall fully into you and so had less to recover from.

It's when you finally does start to do that when this arises. I think the trigger event for him fully lowering all his walls might actually be when you start to indulge him in non-sexual submission? You have him kneel while you read to him, watch him from the bed while he folds your laundry, etc. It's the praise and safety he feels in those moments that allows him to give himself fully later.

He drops hard after the first time he stopped trying to hide. You noticed a difference of course, he was much louder than before, much clingier too. He's just so expressive. Of course you praise him for it, telling him how pretty he looks and sounds like this.

But then the scene is over and you immediately get up to begin drawing a bath for him. When you return with the bucket he's curled up in bed, crying softly to himself.

Needless to say, a much more involved routine is created after that moment. But even with that, subdrop is something he never really grows out of? Doesn't matter how much he loves you and how perfect the aftercare routine is, the bottom line is that he's used to always being on high alert and sometimes he's going to drop when he has to come back from finally giving up that responsibility.

AEGON:

Aegon is another one that just lives to please. Before you he would try to please his mother and father and the whole bloody kingdom, but from the moment he feels the satisfaction of knowing you are pleased with him.... well none of the others matter anymore.

Of course you love that about him, and you always make sure to give him both enough commands and praise. But Aegon's problem is that he doesn't only want to please you, he also wants and arguably needs your attention and time? That's where his conflict comes from. He never ever wants to be a nuisance to you, but despite that desire he still needs to be kissed and held and comforted, and of course he also needs to be dommed.

He tries to balance those two needs but if one must be chosen over the other then he will always choose to serve and please before he chooses the attention. This is a recipe for disaster of course, especially because it forms a very vicious cycle where he needs you more because he's so unsettled because he hasn't pleased you but not having pleased you only makes him need the comfort worse and so it goes.

The solution to this isn't to try and strike a balance between domming him and commanding him, but rather to just stop the cycle completely? There's nothing that turns Aegon's mind off more than when you take over fully and he just does as you say.

Now when you start to see the signs, start to see him looking for things to do with you, hovering over thresholds of doors uncertain if he should come in and spend time with you, then you act. You actually have to be very firm with him, tell him that you're the one in charge so he doesn't get to decide what you do with him. That coupled with staying at his side for a few days sorts him out, at least for a while anyway.

JACAERYS:

His subdrops tend to have one of two main triggers. Firstly, and most obviously, is when he cums and can't do anything else. He gets better at lasting longer and feeling less sensitive afterwards, but there will always be times where his orgasm takes the wind right out of him and he's left unable to do more than just whine and grab your hand. He always feels so guilty, especially at the start when you're still getting used to being able to tell what stimulation will send him over the edge too quick. He feels like a complete failure and that tends to trigger a drop most times, which unfortunately you can't really mitigate the risk of because he's just wired like that.

The only way to comfort him is to promise him that you will let him please you once he's recovered? He won't allow himself to have your comfort until you've told him exactly what he can do to you once he's recovered.

The second trigger is actually something happening outside of your relationship? Jace can't separate those two parts of himself. When he feels he hasn't lived up to his responsibilities as prince then he carries that feeling into the bedroom, and no amount of love and praise can get him out of that headspace. You've tried simply telling him that you won't dom him that night and you can either have vanilla sex or do no more than cuddle but this backfires because he sees it as another rejection.

At first you had no idea how to lower the chances of that trigger for subdrop because you can't change his duties to his mother and the realm and you certainly can't talk him out of scening at all without making it much worse. The only thing that helps is when you give him very detailed instructions for very easy tasks. You watch him closely as he makes the bed or folds the clothes or takes out and repacks the bookshelves, etc. It's always tasks that are very easy but that's the point, the point of the command is so that Jace can do something 100% correctly and receive praise for it.

[jiraisupportgroup]

₊‧°𐐪♡𐑂°‧₊ Tips for Managing a Shopping Addiction ₊‧°𐐪♡𐑂°‧₊

Shopping addictions or impulsive overspending is a really hard habit to break out of, and depending on your financial situation you can end up in really tough spots because of it.

As a general disclaimer: I am not a doctor or therapist, I'm just a mentally ill 24-year-old on the internet who's had issues with overspending (like a lot >-<) but hopefully, these tips can be of some use to you! I would also recommend looking for advice in other areas as well! Don't use this post as your only resource ^-^

♡ Overarching tips ♡

♡ Identify why you might have a shopping addiction. There are many different reasons for this! One thing that can help you identify the reasoning behind it is to analyze the emotions you feel when shopping. Do you feel frantic? Stressed? Really overly-excited? After you make the purchase how do you feel? Do you feel guilt? Shame? Regret? Relief? Super happy? Really analyze your feelings through the process and get a vibe for how it's making you feel. A lot of times shopping addiction develops as a way to cope with negative feelings. If you're feeling sad, stressed, or anxious, it's really tempting to buy yourself a "little treat" to make yourself feel better! But that can spiral into situations where any time you feel those negative emotions you feel a strong urge to go out and buy something to make those feelings go away, and a lot of times they'll come back even worse after the fact. If this is something that you think plays into your shopping addiction, you'll have to build up your resources for healthy coping mechanisms to give yourself alternatives to shopping when you feel down or anxious. Shopping addiction can also develop as a reaction to being in a poor financial situation. You can see this a lot with food and toiletries, but it can happen with other items as well. It makes sense that if someone has experienced food insecurity, once they have extra cash, they'll overstock on food to ensure they never run out again. That same logic applies to other aspects of life as well. If this is something that is playing into your shopping addiction you'll need to do some work into identifying places in your life that you feel the need to overstock on, why you feel that way, and how you can help minimize those feelings to help yourself feel secure without needing to overspend and overstock on those items.

♡ Identify what you are spending your money on. What is it that you're overspending on? Toiletries like skincare products and soaps? Food? Cookware? Clothing? Stuffed animals? Identifying what it is that you impulse buy the most can help you pick up on some of the reasons for your overspending, and can help you know what areas of purchases you need to be more aware of.

♡ Avoid browsing. Especially with online shopping, browsing for items to buy is way too easy. It is so tempting to log onto your favourite shopping websites and just browse for hours, even if you don't need anything! You can open Amazon without the intention of buying anything in particular and the website will shove products into your face until you convince yourself that you absolutely need something T-T so avoid browsing these websites.

♡ Identify when you need something or truly want something vs when you’re experiencing a Fear Of Missing Out (FOMO). There are multiple parts to this. The first one is SALES. 20% off! Free shipping! Buy one get one 50% off! IGNORE THAT!!!! If you did not want to buy it before you saw the sale, do not let the sale influence you into buying it! That's what the corporations want! These sales are designed to create a false sense of urgency so that you feel a stronger need to purchase the product, even if you didn't really want it that much before. Another part of this is trends. This is really easy to see in fashion but it applies to other things as well. Do you really need the new skirt that everyone is talking about? Do you REALLY like the item or do you just want it because everyone else has it and you want to be cool? Would you wear it if no one else was wearing it? Do you already have items to style it with? How often would you actually wear it? Do you already own something similar? These are really important questions to ask when you're shopping for fashion because it is SO EASY to see everyone else wearing something and then just go buy it because everyone else has it, and then they all move on to something else and it just sits in your closet for the next few months never to see the light of day again.

♡ Take note of what you already have. When you're out shopping for something, ask yourself "Do I already have something similar" or "Do I already have something that can serve this same purpose". This works for a lot of things. If you see a new cardigan you really like, think about if you already have a cardigan you can style in the same way. If you're looking at new cookware, ask yourself if you really need another pot or if you have one that can do the same thing. And if you're not sure, go home and check! It is so much better to make sure that you really need the thing that you're buying before you buy it, than to buy it and then realize that you don't need it or you aren't going to use it.

♡ Don’t view shopping as a hobby. Ask yourself... truly, do you treat shopping as though it is a hobby? If you spend multiple hours on shopping websites, it is a hobby. If you get dressed up just to go walk around Target without any specific thing that you need to buy in mind, it is a hobby. Try to replace this with something else that doesn't involve spending money. If you're spending a lot of time on shopping websites, try playing a video game with customizable elements where you can sort of get the feeling that you're buying and building things without spending money (Animal Crossing is really good for this, making Picrews is another good and free option). If it's more of a way to get yourself out of the house try going to places that don't involve shopping instead, there's a surprisingly large number of free or really cheap little art galleries and museums around where you can go walk around and look at cool stuff without really being sold things. Look on your town's website and see if there are any events going on, you'll be really surprised to see how much stuff people organize and do ESPECIALLY around winter-time there are usually loads and loads of free tree-lighting ceremonies and light shows. Talk to your friends too! If meeting up with friends to go shopping is a big part of your friendship dynamic tell them that you're trying to save money and ask if there are other things that you guys can do instead. (Also just as a note I know this is a lot harder in rural areas than cities T-T I do apologise).

♡ In-Store Tips ♡

♡ Don’t go shopping just to go shopping. If you are going shopping make sure that you are shopping for something that you actually need or truly want and have the financial means of getting. Before you walk into the store identify what these things are. Buy only those things. Additionally if you’re looking for something specific but can’t find that item, don’t settle for something else, instead wait until you can find either the specific item you wanted or a really close alternative. Remember that it’s okay to leave a store without buying anything! If you didn’t find what you wanted or needed, you don’t have to buy anything!

♡ Set a reasonable budget. Sometimes it's okay to just go shopping for fun, but you want to make sure that before you go shopping you set a reasonable budget for yourself. You need it to be enough that you'll actually be able to stick to it (like I would not set the budget to $20, that's unreasonably low), but you also want to make sure that it is not SO much that it is going to financially stress you (for example $200 is usually too high for me). For most people, this is going to land you somewhere in the $50-$150 range depending on your income, expenses, and current financial situation. If at any point you find yourself saying "I can spend a little more if I don't do XYZ" STOP. If you start taking money away from other expenses for "fun shopping", STOP. Make sure that all of your essential bills and expenses can be comfortably covered before you start spending fun money.

♡ Wait before you buy. Don't feel rushed or like you have to buy something right now. Identify things in the store that you like, leave the store, and come back later if you can. If you forget anything that you wanted in the time between you leaving the store and coming back, then you don't really need it. If you cant leave the store, step away from your basket for a second. See if you can remember everything in your basket then come back. If there is anything in your basket that you did not remember, put it back. If it’s online do the same thing. Close the page and see if you can remember everything. If you can’t, delete what you didn’t remember. Even better if you wait 1 week before purchasing. You can leave the items in the cart, just wait a few days and see if you still want to buy them after those few days are up. The general idea is that if you do not remember and want the item when it is not in your immediate vicinity, then you likely don't need it. And especially if you leave the store and come back a few days later, if you really really wanted it on day one, but when you come back two days later you don't really want it anymore, then you likely don't need it.

♡ Think critically about each of your purchases. Below is a little chart that @.downsizeupgrade on TikTok uses when she makes a purchase to weigh out if she really needs it or not that I like quite a bit. I did make a few small changes. There are three versions ranging from super cute over the top layout to very simple and easy-to-read layout so that if any of them are hard to read you have options for which one is the easiest for you to use. It is super important to try and be AS HONEST as you can when you’re answering these questions.

[puppyguppy]

The birthday cake is simple for many, various reasons. For one, Shouta's never been the kind of guy for anything over the top, at least, not when it comes to him. For another, it was pretty damn cheap, doing it that way. A single-layer, white cake with just a little bit of black icing scrawled across the top, just enough to say 'its your birthday.' Yes, unenthusiastic period and all. Not that he isn't worth way more than that, but he'd appreciate the fact you didn't spend a fortune on some silly and disposable sweet-treat; the sentiment denser than the calories. It's also just very, very fitting.

Very funny.

Yes, you think you're funny (but so do a few others you let in on it).

There's not even a single candle in the cake, unlit or otherwise.

But, there's a reason for that, too.

At least, there was a reason for that, but Shouta has absolutely refused to cooperate with your little secret plan thus far. All you need him to do is sit down by his own damn cake for like, five seconds --

Eventually, you give up. Inevitably, probably.

It was stupid to think you'd even be able to pull something like that off, anyways. On Shouta Aizawa, of all people. Sure would've been something, though -- to see him, caught off guard with a face full of frosting. Still, there's a party to enjoy, and that's kind of hard to do while so hopefully hyper-focussed on Shouta's every movement.

Not that he's not nice to look at --

So, you let your guard down.

You relax and laugh along with everyone else; it's not a large party by any means, but Shouta knows quite a few people. Which is to say, quite a few people know Shouta. With gifts, good drinks, and great company, it's easy to get distracted.

You don't realize where you're sitting.

Not until fingers thread up into your hair from the nape of your neck, stopping once in the perfect spot to curl against your skull and cradle it, just for a second, in a false sense of security. You're given just enough time to shiver, scalp to shoes, but not enough to figure out who or what or why. And then your center of gravity shifts, your head suddenly forced heavier than the rest of you, and you're promptly suffocated by the dark, squishy, sugary embrace of cake. The very same cake you were trying so, so hard to shove Shouta's face into.

There's more laughter and some cheering, and you think you hear the shutter of a few cellphone cameras going off, all before you're pulled back up for air.

Pulled back up by the very same hand that'd pushed you down, and then had never left.

That grip tugs until taut, until your neck kinks and your head falls back, and you can't help it.

You moan.

And then you flush, heat following the same path as your goosebumps. And someone, somewhere, wolf-whistles while you blink and squint through the smushed confectionary covering your face.

And there, standing both beside and above you, is Shouta, looking every bit the smug birthday bastard that he is.

"You looked like you wanted a taste."

[ohbo-ohno]

I’m feral and need more of your a/b/o thoughts. Like I need to know your thoughts on alpha!141 snatching omega reader to keep for themselves

yknow i was gonna say that i haven't touched abo in forever, but then i remembered the gaz thing i just posted the other day lmao

(btw i wrote alpha 141 here but i think abo poly 141 would have alphas price/ghost and betas soap/gaz. probably. maybe. idfk.)

cw for noncon and kidnapping below the cut

i find poly 141 x reader really difficult to write outside of porn, since there's already so many interesting dynamics in regular poly 141. i have a hard time adding in a FIFTH element, yk? especially when that fifth element has to be a reader insert instead of some sorta OC or smth

anyway, i think the best dark poly 141 x reader idea is basically reader being used as a sex toy for the guys. like, she's there for them to relieve their stress in. but in an abo au i could totally see them using her as an element of softness in their lives. with 4 alphas in one home, you need an omega to soften things up a bit

and there you are. soft and sweet and small (compared to them at least) and just so perfect. you're the unlucky bastard who happens to smell appealing to all of them, and you're whisked away before you really even know it

they'd have to be sneaky, probably. you'd have a positive reaction to their scents too, so maybe johnny or gaz gets you to go on a date with one or both of them and then kidnaps you. maybe price or ghost just grabs you one day. something like that, i think, but there's much higher angst potential is kyle and/or johnny lulls you into a false sense of security first (and you know i love a good betrayal)

they'd push and prod at your instincts to force you into a heat before anything else. lock you in their den (soon to be their nest) and surround you in their scents, make low purrs to convince your instincts that you're safe

and as terrified as you are - and oh boy, are you - there's only so much you can actually fight your instincts. lets say you're either not on heat blockers, or maybe the blockers are weak, but for whatever reason you're very susceptible to all of their little pushes

they've got you knotted and mated by the end of the week

it's odd, coming up from that heat. your neck aches all the way around, to the point that it's painful to even turn your head. despite the unfamiliar room, your brain screams at you that you're safe, that you're in your nest.

it doesn't take long to put together the pieces. it also doesn't take long to become very very upset

thing is, it's too late to do anything now. you can't break a bond, and they're not giving you any opportunities to get away. you're stuck with these alphas who have performed the greatest invasion possible on your body and soul. it's crushing

cue lots of attempted comfort. soap and gaz would be the softest with you, always trying to tempt you into realizing how good it is to be with them. soap is rougher when he fucks you, but they're both equally soft outside of that. they bring you nesting materials, constantly make sure you're covered in their scents, and bicker over who gets to cuddle you on the couch

ghost isn't willing to coddle you. he's sweet (in his own right) but he's not nice. he doesn't try to make you feel better - you're meant to be with them, why should he apologize for making it happen? all they did was skip the courting process, this is always where you were going to end up. he refuses to apologize for that. but he also doesn't want you miserable. he holds you close at night, soaks with you for long hours in the tub, and is always making sure you clear your plate

price is... weird. i'm never sure if i should make him the meanest or a softer kidnapper. because i could absolutely see a version of price whipping your ass raw every time you scream at them and call them names, but i can also see a version of price who just levels you with a disapproving stare and locks you in a small dark space when you get like that

regardless, they all smother you. you help balance out their dynamics a bit more, but they're always fighting each other for your attention. especially with the bond making it so they always know what you're feeling. and your instincts scream to trust them (and you can feel their emotions too, know that they really meant for the best, as sick and twisted as it is).

[smfolklore]

Anticipation

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Author's Note : Hi! This is my first piece that I'll be uploading. I would love your thoughts on this if you'd be so kind. I hope you all enjoy it and I'm so excited to write more Tobias content. 2.3K Word's 😈

Synopsis : Y/N reluctantly ask's the Dauntless instructor she was assigned, and that she (unfortunately) finds attractive to help her train. There's tension. Please let me know what else you'd like to see.

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She can’t help how her thoughts drift toward the moment his fingers brushed her abdomen. How goosebumps exploded across her skin, and how they easily engulfed her entire midsection.

His voice was low, and deep, right against her ear as he positioned her in a way that would allow her to actually hurt her opponents.

That was yesterday and she can't stop the incessant place that her mind runs to as soon as it's given a moment to think. The attraction she felt for him was so insanely inappropriate. And yet.. the possibility of him reciprocating lulled her into a false sense of security.

That it’s okay.

It won’t end as awfully as she’s imagined.

Y/N’s attention is redirected when she sees the initiates begin to disperse, and her instructor walk toward the knives that they had launched only minutes before she began to fantasize about a 2 minute interaction she had with a boy. 

He must’ve dismissed the session.

Christina and Will turn to look at Y/N in anticipation of what they’ll be doing with the allotted time that they were given.

She half listens as Will discusses going to the parlor to get his first tattoo, but eventually says with a small smile, “Actually, I-uh I’m going to talk to Four. You two can go and I’ll catch up?”.

Christina tilts her head, slightly suspicious, but Y/N gives away absolutely nothing, that perfected smile of innocence she learned in Abnegation carefully placed on her face.

Four’s back is facing her, and once Will and Christina have left, Y/N reluctantly travels from her spot in the training center toward the steel table that holds an abnormally large amount of knives in any other situation. But this is Dauntless, and weapons are normal.

Her heart is pounding and before she can utter a single word he’s anticipated her arrival and muttered, “What is it?”. It isn’t particularly unkind, or malicious in any way. It’s him, and the way that he addresses all of his initiates.

But it has her pausing. Was she insane? Should she just leave?

In spite of the fact that she’s attracted to him, she really could learn from him. And god knows she needs all of the practice that she can get. 

Her arms rest by her side, but the fingers of her right hand are fidgeting as she nervously says, “I don’t know if this is against the rules, but I was wondering if you would help me improve my fighting”.

He still isn’t facing her. He’s diligently organizing the weapons by type. Y/N’s hoping to God he doesn’t refuse her. The mortification would be enough to simply volunteer to become factionless. 

She fills the silence, “If you can’t, that’s okay too! I understand you're busy–and you know what? Just–it’s okay! Forget about it..” She begins to scramble for an appropriate exit, when his voice suddenly rings out.

“I’ll see you here tomorrow at 5. We’ll practice in the morning before your normal sessions and then a second time when dinner is no longer being served”.

Y/N can’t help the smile that fills her face but she almost instinctively kills it. She’s giddy on the inside though. He’s really going to help her. She might actually be able to stay in this faction. 

And spending time with her instructor isn’t exactly a hardship.

She gives a “Thank you” in response and begins to leave the training center, her footsteps light and the only trace of her exit being the sound of the entrance clicking shut.

–––

I stifle the groan I want to let out as my alarm blares beneath my pillow. I shoved it underneath the two pillows that I’d managed to acquire throughout my initiation to try and muffle the noise. Thankfully it worked and the only noise, or rather the only feeling that is escaping is a relentless buzz.

I use two fingers to press against the mirroring sides of the machine simultaneously in order to turn it off. I don’t know what I would have done if I’d awoken the entire dormitory.

I drag myself out of my mattress and begin to clothe myself, my matching black fitted long-sleeve sweater and black workout pants being an absolute pain to put on. I internally curse myself as I have to haul this on. Who told me it was going to be practical to buy this?

Once I’ve deemed myself presentable and not like I’ve just awoken from the pits of hell, I begin my trek to the training center, the clock on the wall reading 4:52 in the morning. As I enter I’m startled when my eyes land on Four. 

But then I’m not. Of course he’s already here. I almost want to roll my eyes.

It’s ridiculous that everything about him is so.. neat. He’s poised, well-balanced, and punctual. He’s never lost his temper. I’ve never once seen this man so much as stumble. And, annoyingly, has never run late for a session. 

Regardless I approach him with a small, “Hi” as I step onto the platform carefully, now standing in front of him.

His intense eyes reach mine and despite what I expected, which was a change of subject, he says in response, “Hi. You’re a bit early”.

I’m a little bit confused given that it’s now 4:56, which means I’m only about 4 minutes ‘early’. But I laugh and quickly take the opportunity to further our conversation. “I didn’t want to be late. You’re doing me a huge favor”.

“Did you think I was going to leave if you weren’t here on time?” His voice is.. amused. His tone is full of dry sarcasm and it has my eyebrow’s shoot up in surprise. He’s actually engaging in genuine conversation; albeit I haven’t managed to pull a smile out of him. Still, it’s far more progress than I thought I was going to get.

I grin, my eyes bright at the possibility that we might become familiar, “Well, I don’t know if I’d exactly put it past you”.

I wonder if I’m hallucinating when I see a flicker of excitement roll through his eyes. But I quickly deny it to myself. I shouldn’t jump to conclusions. I can’t ruin this opportunity; I need to pass this stage.

There’s a smile on his lips, but it's tilted down, almost as if to prove my accusation. But I get the sense that he’s lying; he wouldn’t have left me here alone if I was late. He’s amused, possibly impressed.

But the smile is quickly wiped off my face when his smile slips off his expression and he becomes Four again. I don’t know who I was talking to just seconds before.. but I like that version of him. Easy going. 

As he talks, he positions me.

He begins a slow drawl of words, “I’ve noticed for you in particular, because of your height and weight, you’d do well in offense. You’re light, and can escape the grip of your opponent rather easily if you learn how”.

I straighten my posture and shiver when he reaches for my two wrists, the words still slipping past his lips, “You need to practice maintaining your space. Don’t let your limbs flail. It’ll stop an opponent from being able to keep a grip on you, understand?”

It’s hard to focus with the way his body is so close to mine. He’s at a respectable distance, but still closer than we’ve encountered before. My eyes flit between his as we make eye contact. I nod slowly to demonstrate my understanding. When his grip loosens he remarks, “Okay. I’m going to charge at you. I’m not going to hit you, but I want you to try and maneuver yourself in a way that will allow you to hit me, and not kill yourself in the process”.

I almost want to laugh at the way he’s phrased that, but I bite my tongue and instead focus on mentally preparing for this. How is that even a possibility? Is there a way for me to hit him while still being out of his reach?

We stand in position, my back straight and my limbs as close to me as possible. My arms are at my side and I’m not in a wide stance in order to evade being slammed onto the platform if he manages to catch a foot.

His stance is much more intimidating. It’s perfected. He could kill me if he wanted too.

I wait for him to approach me, and it’s difficult to resist the temptation to simply bolt out of the way. But I think I’ve come up with a solid plan. I can move at the last second, which will allow me to strike him because his momentum from charging at me will be far too high. 

In this case, his weight is a disadvantage. And for once, mine is at an advantage. Or maybe it’s always at an advantage. I just needed his perspective.

It’s when I’m slightly distracted that he charges at me. I never pegged him for a cheater.

Regardless of my thoughtlessness, I manage to step to the side, only I’m a split second too late. He grips my wrist, which I failed to maintain close to myself in my haste to step away from him. 

He uses his hold on my wrist to pull me close to him, and given how quickly the entire situation is happening, I collide with him, my chest pressed to his. And my palm instinctively presses to his chest in order to maintain a distance, but it only inadvertently has me closer to him. I’m panting a bit as I try to process everything that just happened.

He caught me off guard!

I lift my eyes to his and he’s speaking before I can slip a word in, “You need to focus. Remember to have your limbs as close to you as possible” I nod in agreement and he adds, “That was a very clever strategy. Quick thinking”.

I’m still breathing a bit heavily, as is he, though I don’t know if it’s from the exertion of charging at me.. or because of how closely intertwined we are.

“Thank you”, I mutter with a small smile as I slowly pull my hand away from his chest and he releases my wrist.

He doesn’t reveal a single thought about what just occurred. His breathing is the only possible indication of how he might feel. But as he motions for me to get into my original position again he follows with, “When you’re within an appropriately close distance to your opponent, remember that you have small limbs. Shorter arms, shorter legs. You can use this to help you”.

I don’t quite understand his logic. He recognizes this and begins in my direction. When he starts to get as close as we just were, my eyes widen in surprise but he only says, “Try to knee me”.

I hesitate but I instantly lift my knee to do as he says, I don’t do it hard, only to simulate the motion he’s trying to show me and grin in excitement when I understand what he’s insinuating. At this distance, I can hit him, and it will hurt. But if he attempts to do as I did, it wouldn’t work. His limbs are far too long, and with the small distance between him and I, he can’t even lift his knee.

When I lift my head to meet his eyes, my breath hitches as I realize his head is tilted down to look at me. Which means.. We’re at an incredibly inappropriate distance. I could kiss him if I lifted myself up onto my toes. 

My eyes find his lips briefly, before I snap them back toward his eyes, trying to not trace every detail I can in order to not give myself away. But I’m not the only one who’s feeling affected by this. The words he was about to utter don’t come as they get lodged in his throat.

He’s so close to me, and we’re simply staring at one another as the tension rolls through us.. through the entire training center. Waiting to see who will break it first. I desperately want to stay in this moment, despite how horrible it is to feel attraction for him. He’s my instructor.. there’s no universe where he reciprocates. 

But the way his breathing has increased and his eyes are flitting to my lips says otherwise.

Did I imagine that?

He clears his throat and breaks our eye contact. Turning his attention to my legs, and saying, “Do you understand what I was trying to say?”

I hesitate, still briefly stunned by the moment just there, but I hoarsely respond, “Yes, thank you”.

He goes to his original mark, in position again. I regain control of myself and heavily exhale as I concentrate.

This time, when he charges at me I move in the exact direction I did the first time, knowing that he will have expected me to go the opposite way. 

Reverse psychology. If he can cheat, so can I.

I grin when I see the delayed movement of him coming to the realization that I actually did as he said and managed to evade his grip. And I take this opportunity to strike him, swiping his feet out so that his back slams against the platform.

I almost feel pitiful, but when I see the grin on his face, my pity evaporates. He’s proud of me. He quickly resumes his position and says, “Great. Now try and do it again”.

Though this time his eyes are narrowed, and I frown nervously, contrary to the bubbling pit of excitement running through me as well, when I realize he was being kind. And now he’s going to actually train me.

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That's it! I love this so please let me know if you liked it and if you'd like to see more! And to @remussbitch who asked to be tagged, here it is. I hope you enjoy.

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