#but is probably going to be abandoned by the company that made it in 6-8 months even if they still sell the bottles after that

[tap-tap-tap-im-in]

So, there is a use case for all these smart devices. My wife's smart watch just saved her life earlier this week.

But until the industry adopts a centralized open source framework for the software and the hardware these things are going to have stupidly short lifespans, as well as have huge privacy concerns.

I know enough about the innards of these things to know that if you dig deep enough they're probably built on well known open source libraries already so hopefully it's not a huge leap. But it would also mean you don't have to install a stupid app for each new device you get, just one that keeps getting extended.

It probably won't happen because open source means that someone would notice if data was being shipped out to centralized servers for unknown purposes, but it would make all these gizmos more useful and resilient.

[vampzity]

𝙈𝙮 𝙊𝙙𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙔𝙤𝙪..

Pairing: idol! hongjoong x f!reader

Genre: fluff, bit of angst, valentine’s day, one shot, valentines series, pet names (mama), mini idol au, rapper au, strong language, arguing

Synopsis: It’s Valentine’s Day, probably one of your favorite holidays to spend with Hongjoong who you’ve been with for almost 4 years now. You both planned to go out for dinner at a new 5-star restaurant that opened in Seoul, which critics and fellow idol friends raved about. Hongjoong told you days before that he’d meet you at the restaurant after he finished up with the boy’s studio time for their upcoming album and you were okay with that. However, when you arrive, he’s not present. What seems like minutes soon turns into an hour as his presence never shows. Did you get stood up,.. on Valentine’s Day?

Now Playing: Star 1117 - ATEEZ

Word Count: 3.1k

A/N: welcome to the first member involved in my Valentine’s Day series! I will be doing all Ateez members and will be uploading on different days, so please be patient :)) enjoy!

Masterlist Seonghwa's Pt.

“Ugh.. where is he??!!”

You sat in the corner of a restaurant growing impatient as time continued to pass. It was now 8 o’clock and your reservation time was for 6. Constantly checking your phone for notifications, even for calls from him hoping that he’d respond and he wasn’t actually blowing you off. Blow you off for what though? You guys have been together for almost 4 years now.. why now? Why would he all of a sudden abandon you without explanation?

You unlocked your phone, quickly clicking on your conversation to text him again.

You: Where are you??!!! It’s been 2 hours now! Hongjoong, we’ve planned this for weeks now.. there’s no way you’d just forget?!

You locked the phone and set it back on the table, looking around once more as you tried to fight back the tears ready to fall. Another message just ignored like the 5 messages and 10 calls you’ve sent.

“Miss, it’s getting to be 8 now. Would you like to take your order now? If not, I’m going to have to ask you to leave… I’m sorry.”

A young man dressed in a suit and tie stood before you, a worried look settled on his face as he held the menu in his hands. Anger took hold of you as you grabbed your phone and put your jacket on quickly. Apologizing to the waiter, you stormed out of the restaurant, feeling a rush of tears slide down your embarrassed cheeks. You grabbed your phone, anxious to even call the drivers that served under your boyfriend’s company. You looked up at the sky, feeling a small breeze hit your face as you sighed.

“I can’t fucking believe this.”

Your eyes met the horizon as you lowered your head, beginning to walk towards the home both you and Hongjoong shared. You didn’t need the drivers contacting Hongjoong about your sudden change of plans from the restaurant if they didn’t see him there with you. You didn’t want him to contact you at all. He ignored you for practically half of the day, and wouldn’t even respond to the texts and calls you repeatedly sent him. Now look, walking home alone, sad and hungry. How could you ever forgive him for this?

You sighed once more, unlocking your phone to call Hongjoong one last time before completely giving up. However, after a couple of rings, you were met with his voicemail once again.

“Hey! This is Hongjoong! Sorry I couldn’t pick up your call but I’ll be sure to get back to you soon! Leave a message! BEEP—”

You felt your body heat up as anger fueled you more and more, your face flushing with it as well. As much as you hated arguing, even yelling with him, you could no longer resist. He deserved to hear your pain, hear how upset he made you, how he abandoned you with no explanation on Valentine’s Day of all days.

“I can’t believe you! How could you do this to me?? On Valentine’s Day Jjoong? Are you kidding me?!” You felt waves of hot tears begin to fall down your cheeks again as your lips quivered. “You couldn’t even return my texts, couldn’t call me at least to let me know a change of plans?! You left me there for 2 hours, 2 whole fucking hours Jjoong!!! Why now?! Why do you want to suddenly ditch me like this now?!”

You paused to catch your breath as your tears began to feel choking. When was the last time you’ve cried like this? All you felt was sadness, betrayal, broken-heartedness, and embarrassment. How could this happen to you of all people?

“Don’t even think about returning a call. Whenever you decide to come the fuck home, maybe then we can talk. Goodbye. Hongjoong.” Forwarding the voicemail to him, you muted his texts and calls as you didn’t want to speak to him. Making it home, you unlocked the door, closing it aggressively behind you. You just wanted to take a shower and go to bed, not even wanting to think about what a horrendous Valentine’s this has been. You wish the day would be over, that you never would’ve had to experience it in the first place.

You replaced your shoes with your slippers at the door and made your way upstairs towards the bathroom, staring at yourself in the mirror. Your eyes were red and puffy from the countless breakdowns you had on your walk home. Dried-up mascara stained your cheeks, only making you frown at your bland expression. You signed and removed your coat, placing it on the counter. Walking to turn the shower faucet on, you daydreamed of what the date would’ve been like if he had just shown up as promised.

Buzz, buzz.

Your phone had interrupted your thoughts but quickly grabbed your attention as you hadn't received a notification in hours. You scurried over to it, seeing a phone call from an unsaved number, not even a recognizable one. Your gut told you to pick it up, you’re not sure why but that’s exactly what you did.

“Hello? Who’s this?”

There was silence on the other end for a moment making you question if it was a scammer. You rolled your eyes ready to hang up until a familiar voice responded softly.

“Hello..? Y/n? It’s me, San!”

Your eyes lit up a bit at hearing him. It gave you a slight sense of relief to hear someone after the day you’d been having. Even though it wasn’t the exact person you’ve been wanting to hear from, it was still better than nothing.

“San?! How did you get my number? And it’s almost 10 o’clock! What are you doing still up?”

“I’m surprised he even is up!”

You heard a faint yell in the back as a few snickers followed behind. San groaned as he began to bicker with the other body in the room.

“Wooyoung shut up! I can stay up past 9 just like you gu— yea yea I’m sure you can, sleeping beauty!”

More laughter began to be heard through the phone as Wooyoung cut San off mid-sentence to insult him. The young man groaned heavily as he excused himself from the call, everything going silent for a second. You were sure he muted himself just to scold his younger friend and others who laughed at him in the room. It made you wonder if Hongjoong too, was in that room with them. You heard a door slam as San began to take himself off of mute.

“Sorry about that, you know how much of a pain Woo is..”

You laughed a bit, feeling at ease while talking to San. San has always been the kindest out of all the members to you, all the others were nice but San always made sure you were okay. He went out of his way to help you out and talk to you whenever he could. You guys were practically best friends.

“Anyways, I’m just calling to check up on you.. are you alright?? Captain says he’s been trying to call you for the last 30 minutes and you weren’t answering..”

Your heart sunk a bit at hearing San mention Hongjoong. So he was still with them?! This entire time?! You stood silent for a bit as your thoughts of what to say ate away at you.

“I’m okay.” You responded coldly, feeling a welt of sadness beginning to wash over you once again. You weren’t sure how to relieve your pain to San and as much as you wanted to speak to Hongjoong, you knew you needed the space to prevent lashing out on him.

“Y/n? It’s okay, I already know what’s going on.”

You froze a bit, not sure of how to proceed as you heard a small sigh come from the other side of the phone. You swallowed the lump in your throat as nervousness washed over you, your hands becoming clammy. San cleared his throat before proceeding to speak to you.

“I know you may not wanna speak to Hyung right now, but you should come to the studio. He has something for you here.”

You groaned as you rolled your eyes, knowing you just wanted to be left alone for the rest of the night. The last thing you needed was to be reminded of what a beautiful Valentine’s this was.

“I don’t know Sannie. I kind of just want to be alone right now.”

“Please?? I promise you won’t regret it, and you won’t believe how incredibly sorry Hyung is right now... I’ve never seen him this sad..”

San’s words felt like a stab to your heart. He’s never been this sad? Anger left your body slowly, not only feeling drained from the day but yearning for Hongjoong. Maybe you went a bit overboard, maybe it was all a harmless mistake but at this time, it was too late to take anything you said back. You’ve never yelled or lashed out at Hongjoong as you did in the voicemail, and to know all 7 of his members heard it? You felt embarrassed for him.

“Sannie, I’m sorry. I just want to be alone. Tell Hongjoong I’ll be home. Goodnight.”

“I understand, goodnight y/n.”

The phone hung up and you felt your body ache. The amount of hurt you felt in your heart was too much to bear. You turned off the bathroom light and made your way downstairs to the couch, lying down on the cushions. You placed your phone on the table by the couch and closed your eyes. Tears slowly escaped them as you sniffed and sooner or later, your drained body took over, drifting you into a deep slumber.

Hongjoong got out of the car, thanking the driver for a safe ride home. He made eye contact with the members who traveled in this van with him, their eyes worrying about what awaited him at home. The silence remained for a moment when Seonghwa spoke up.

“Be gentle with her. Remember this has never happened in your relationship, let alone to her. She’s probably feeling little at the moment.”

Seonghwa gave a soft reassuring smile to Hongjoong, an agreeing nod being returned by the two other members in the vehicle. Hongjoong sighed as he smiled softly. “Thank you, Hyung. I appreciate the advice.” He waved goodbye to Seonghwa and the others as the driver closed the door, making his way back to the driver’s seat.

The car sped off and he began to open the door, closing it behind him as he placed his jacket on the coat hanger. The house was dark as if you were never home in the first place. He changed into his house slippers, quickly seeing you sleeping soundly on the couch with a small frown on your face.

Hongjoong’s heart sank as he witnessed the sight of you. How you didn’t even bother to change out of the clothes you wore for him today, how your dried-up mascara stained your cheeks. You were genuinely so hurt over his disappearance, especially when it never happened before. He admired what you picked out for him. It was a silky spaghetti-strapped black dress, with a small slit on the left side. He noticed your favorite pair of sparkly black heels by the door, about 4 inches high. All things he had gotten you the last few weeks, to wear for today.

Hongjoong walked over to you quietly, wrapping his arms under you he picked you up bridal style, beginning to carry you up the stairs to your shared bedroom. You hummed softly, still half asleep as you couldn’t register what was going on. He opened the door, softly placing you on your side of the bed and pulling the blanket over you. He left the room for a moment before returning with a warm wet rag and some of your makeup wipes. Kneeling beside your face, he softly wiped off any makeup you had left remaining being sure not to wake you up.

As he began to leave the room again, you opened your eyes, confused as to how you ended up in your bedroom. You turned your head towards the bathroom door, hearing the sound of a running faucet on. Sitting up, you began to wipe your eyes as Hongjoong re-entered the room, pausing when you too met eyes. He wore a pair of black slacks and a white button-down with the sleeves rolled up, followed by a dark blue tie hanging from the collar of his neck. He stood there frozen, not sure if the next few words he spoke would upset you once again.

“Mama, please I’m sorry. I swear I can explain,” he spoke softly, his hands beginning to fiddle with each other. He looked down at the ground, expecting only the worst from you after your voicemail. Your heart skipped a beat, not expecting him to reference your nickname even during the heart of an argument.

You sat silent for a second, unsure of what to say. As much as you wanted to be angry, you knew it wasn’t the answer. You could tell how heartbroken he was to hear how you reacted, to see you asleep on the couch still in your clothing. The last thing you wanted to do was put up a fight.

“Where have you been all this time??? We had planned this for weeks Jjoong, do you know how embarrassed I was??”

No words were shared between you two. Hongjoong made his way over to his desk, sitting in the roller chair. You glared at him for a moment, before slowly looking away. “I know, I seriously fucked up. Please just let me explain.” He looked at you with worried eyes, not sure of where to start his story but all he could feel was a sense of guilt dawning on him as he pleaded for your attention. You nodded softly, eyes reaching back to meet his, giving him your full attention.

“Yes, I was at the studio. My phone died while I was there and no one had a charger. I told Wooyoung to remind me when it hit 5:30 so that I could meet you at the restaurant.” He looked down at his business attire and sighed as he put his head in his hands.

“I was already changed by 3:30 in case, but time went by... Wooyoung forgot to tell me, which led me being caught up in our work for today. By the time San arrived, by the time I got a charger, I knew it was too late. I was wrong... it was an asshole move. You didn’t deserve to be blown off like that and I’m so sorry, Mama. You don’t even need to forgive me. Shit, I wouldn’t. I understand completely how wrong I was to do this to you. To even plan anything at all for today when it should’ve been about us.. about you..”

Silence began to engulf you both as you were left speechless by his confession and apology. He sighed softly as he went onto his computer, clicking away through apps and files until he stopped, facing you again.

“You don’t have to say anything, Mama. It’s okay,” He smiled at you softly, brushing his black hair back out of his eyes. “This is what we worked on today. This is why I got so caught up in the studio..” He pats the bedside next to him, gesturing for you to come sit by him. You furrowed your eyebrows at him, rolling your eyes.

“Jjoong, what does this have to do with what we’re talking about right now??”

He shook his head and continued to pat the bed. “Please... it’s for you.” You sighed and scooted by him as he began to hit play on the track. It was a slower song, something you normally weren’t used to when it came to his writing. As the lyrics began to play, you noticed familiar writing within the song. You looked up at him, his eyes remaining closed as he began to feel like one with the song.

That’s when it hit you. Notes from your letters. They were small lines taken from letters that you had sent Hongjoong when you were abroad for college. Lines expressing your love for him, how much you had missed him and wished to hold him in your arms. How the stars in the sky reminded you of him, twinkling so brightly on the clearest days.

You felt tears began to swell in your eyes as every lyric began to hit sentimentally. Hongjoong looked up as he began to hear your sniffles and pulled your arm to sit in his lap. He held you tightly as you cried into his shoulder, apologizing repeatedly for lashing out at him earlier. He rubbed your back slowly, reassuring you over and over that it was okay and he deserved to know how upset you were with him.

The song hit you in a way that you’d never think of. To know Hongjoong had spent his entire afternoon composing and recording this song for you? Making sure the members sang every part exactly how he wanted to please you. How could you continue to be angry with him after this?

“Jjoong—”

He shushed you and held you tighter, resting his head against yours. He planted a soft kiss on your forehead, apologizing once more. “Don’t say anything Mama, you did nothing wrong. I hope you liked the song... I spent weeks working on this for your gift, even if the day went wrong.”

You looked up at him, your eyes meeting as you smiled softly. You nodded, nuzzling your nose against his own. You placed a small kiss on his cheek, bringing your thumb up to caress it slowly. “Words can’t explain how much I loved it. Thank you.”

Hongjoong returned a smile to you, placing his hand on top of your own on his face. He gazed into your eyes for a second, taking in this precious moment he had with you. One he wouldn’t trade for the world, not even a stupid Valentine’s dinner.

“What’s the song called?” You mumbled softly, hand still placed on his cheek as your cocked your head to him. He closed his eyes, his smiling widening.

“Star 1117.”

Your eyes lit up at this, realizing the small reference in the title. 11/17, the day you guys officially started dating. Star simply for the meaning of guidance, as sailors used it to guide their way through the oceans. To you personally, it was also what you had nicknamed Hongjoong. You saw him as your star, always shining even through the cloudiest of days in the sky. He was your guidance in this game called life and you couldn’t be any less grateful for him.

“Want to know my favorite lyric? Something you wrote for me?” You nodded at his words, eager whenever he talked about his lyrical logic.

“I will protect you forever, and forever you are my star..”

divider creds: @cafekitsune

A/N: i thought the meaning for Star 1117 was so cute, I had to incorporate it into this somehow. :’) *updated Seonghwa's part is now out!*

Tag list:@skzline @evidive @kittykat-25 @amuromio @xoxkii @losrpark @classyrbf @sundaybossanova @owmoiralover @vrtualsins @sanslovesblog

*comment to be part of future taglists!*

[abbyfmc]

Under the water

Submechanophobia: Irrational fear of man-made things submerged in water, whether boats, canoes, cruise ships, submarines, animatronics, or other mostly metal objects.

That being said, I can imagine a yandere boy (boyfriend, ex-boyfriend, or whatever) next to you, in situations related to this interesting phobia.

TW: Well, submechanophobia, harassment, probable psychological damage and yandere behavior.

[Y🔧A🔧N🔧D🔧E🔧R🔧E A🔧N🔧D🔧R🔧O🔧I🔧D]

🔧1- It could have been like I said, an android, a robot or a mechanical attraction that:

1.1- It could have been aquatic: That is, it operated or continues to operate in water attractions, whether partially or completely submerged in water.

1.2- It was abandoned: It no longer operates because it had many continuous failures, malfunctioned or simply stopped being profitable and therefore, it ended up abandoned in a very humid place or under water.

1.3- Flood: The place where it operated was flooded in catastrophic and irreparable ways.

2. I'd like to think that you would be a worker, or the engineer who was in charge of maintaining it personally (and therefore, you spent a lot of time with it). You did constant maintenance as a daily job, and on a few occasions "emergency maintenance"; repairing possible faults on him.

3. Everything was going well until your attraction was "temporarily" closed for whatever reason, the android or yandere robot found out, he had faith in seeing you again.

4. --Well, maybe she's busy today.-- He said when a day went by without seeing you after his attraction closed.

5. --Well, maybe she's on vacation. I'm looking forward to seeing her so she can tell me everything during my maintenance.-- I would say after a few days or weeks. He still has hope of seeing you again, specifically you.

6. --My water is getting dirty and I haven't seen her for a long time. I don't like this at all; has something happened to her? -- It must have been many months or a year and by now the standing water is mouldy and very dirty; she hasn't seen you or any other worker for a year or two, so she can't ask anyone about you either.

7. He slowly realized that he was abandoned by his creator company, but he refused to believe that he was abandoned by you. He was hoping that you would come back, talk to him, and maintain him again. But the years passed and he only began to rust and rot more and more.

8. Fortunately for him, the company that owns the theme park called you and others to inspect the facilities in detail to determine the future of each area.

9. You decided to visit your old work area, not knowing that he is still there, alive and waiting for you.

10. Everything was bad. The paint was peeling, rusty and damp; some parts had fallen off; there was a lot of noise everywhere; it was damp due to the place being there; not to mention the terrible smell of mouldy, stagnant water that hasn't been changed for years. You and your team walked around the site, not imagining that you weren't alone, as your old friend noticed your presence and worse yet… he had seen you.

11. I was happy to see you, but I HATED seeing your teammates with you. I thought they were the ones responsible for taking you away from him, and there was no way I was going to let you go this time.

12. He would kill your team one by one, coming out of the water to drag them and drown them in the dirty water.

13. No, he won't accept you leaving him and abandoning him once again. He will play hide and seek with you and come out of the water to look for you. Once he finds you, you would see how the water and the passing of time affected him; he will come to you, pick you up and take you with him to be together once again, like in the past.

14. He would sense your terror at seeing him not only submerged, but at the fact that he has somehow come to life, remembers you, and is willing to drown you if it means you'll stay together until the end of your days.

-The End.

So, what do you think about it?

I've never seen any stories about yandere boys (especially androids or robots) related to this phobia, so I decided to take the risk and see how it goes. I'm not lying, I like the concept of a yandere android or robot that has been abandoned and when you return to the place, he's already waiting for you.

[petitelepus]

A Loner's Unexpected Journey, Part 2

Kimetsu Academy!Genya Shinazugawa X Fem!Reader

Summary: You're once again alone and heading to eat your lunch the way you liked it, alone, when you run into a familiar face.

Warnings: None

A/N: Modern!AU, Kimetsu Academy, Female Reader, Genya Shinazugawa

PART 1 II PART 2 II PART 3 II PART 4 II PART 5 II PART 6 II PART 7 II PART 8 II PART 9 II PART 10 II PART 11 II PART 12 II PART 13 II PART 14 II PART 15 II PART 16 II PART 17 II PART 18

You could truly tell how the whole classroom was divided into groups during lunchtime when the members of the said groups would flock together.

Popular guys would talk about sports they had, girls or such, nerds would talk about anime and games and those happy popular girls were sitting by the window again, chatting happily about how they wanted to go to karaoke as they enjoyed their lunches.

You? You were alone at your seat at the entrance like a loner you were. It might have looked brutal, but you were happy as you were, so why did people have to try and include you? You had heard it all before, those pitiful stares and whispers.

"She is eating by herself?"

"Again?"

"Doesn't she, like, have even one friend to eat with?"

"So sad."

They had once tried to ask you to join them in what they must have thought was out of pity, but you could tell they were only taunting you.

You had looked at the poor girl they had sent to ask you and said, "No thank you. I'm fine here." before completely ignoring her. However, once she returned to her friends, they were all giggling like crazy, at you no doubt.

If you had to choose, you would probably have most common with Otakus, those nerds and gamers, but you weren't really a team player. You preferred going solo.

So once lunchtime rolled around, you grumbled by yourself as you grabbed your shoulder bag and made your way out of the classroom before the groups could form.

Many people brought lunch from home and some used their pocket money to buy something from the canteen. You had your own lunch packed in your shoulder bag so you didn't need to buy anything, but what you sought wasn't food but a place to eat in peace.

Normally you would eat outside, but since it was Fall already, it could get pretty chilly outside. So you ventured to this old abandoned classroom that was mainly used to store furniture and such. You liked eating there, you had a place to sit, it was quiet and the best part was that there was no one else there ever.

Or so you thought. You opened to door and stepped inside, but before you could close the door you heard someone say your name. You flinched, slightly startled, and whipped around to see the young man with wild hair and a huge scar on his face, Genya Shinazugawa.

"Oh. Genya." You looked around, trying to see if there was anyone else with him, but he appeared to be alone. You weren't sure if you wanted to disturb him so you turned around, ready to leave, willing to leave your normal place to eat for the sake of being alone again, "I'm sorry, I'll go somewhere else-!"

"W- wait!" Genya called after you and you stopped in your tracks and turned to look at him, "What is it?"

"Would you, uh… Would you like to eat with me…?" He asked carefully, his face flushed red as he averted his gaze. You were starting to see a pattern here when he would blush and look away.

You weren't really sure if you wanted to stay, but you kind of liked Genya and you actually didn't really mind his company. At least that's what you thought, based on his visit to your place last week.

After a small moment of silence, you turned to look at him properly, "Are you sure?"

He nodded quickly and you huffed as you walked up to him and sat by the desk next to his. You dug out your convenience store-bought lunch box from your shoulder bag and you and Genya both noticed that you had the exact same boxes. Same meat on rice and light salad on the side.

"Ah-!" You both opened your mouths to speak, only to speak over one another. This made you both blush and avert your gazes from each other.

"You, uh…" You started awkwardly, "You have a good taste…"

"Thanks…" Genya nodded, "You too…"

Oh God, how could the two of you be so awkward? The two of you got your disposable utensils that came with the lunch boxes and started to eat in silence. The rich meat was well-balanced with pretty bland rice and the side salad was both fresh and refreshing. You were almost done with your lunch when your curiosity got the best of you.

"So, uh…" You frowned as you tried to figure out what to say, "What brings you here?"

"I was just…" Genya looked aside, "I was searching for a remote place to eat in peace."

"Ah…" You nodded, "I'm sorry, I barged in here."

"I- it's okay!" The young man blushed, "If it's you then I don't mind company…"

You blinked as you felt your cheeks tingle as blush rose to your cheeks. You averted your gaze and asked, "Don't you have anyone to eat with?"

"I'm… Not exactly popular or anything…" Genya admitted quietly, "People are kind of afraid of me and I admit, I can be scary and temperamental…"

Ah, you were both kind of similar, or at least in the same boat… But he couldn't help it if he was scary looking, you could at least try to be nicer, but you didn't trust anyone enough to actually open up a little.

"I know how you feel. I'm not exactly very friendly so I don't have any friends." You said as you looked at him, "I admit that I am also a pretty cynical person."

You were a little ashamed of admitting it, but Genya seemed to understand.

"You seem nice enough for me?" He thought out loud, much to your surprise.

"Well…" You frowned as you felt your cheeks tingle more, "Unlike most of the guys and girls in this school, you seem like an alright guy. Genuine and honestly nice."

"I… T- thank you?" Genya blushed as he averted his gaze and you felt a little silly, talking like that to a guy you barely knew… But somehow you had this feeling that you could trust him and that he wasn't like other people.

"How is Lady?" He suddenly asked.

"Hm?" You looked at him in confusion and he cleared his throat, "The kitten."

"Oh!" You felt stupid, not immediately realizing that he was talking about the kitten you had adopted from the streets a little over a week ago.

"She is doing well. Hungry, the little one eats like a damn horse but that's apparently expected from young and growing kittens like her."

Genya smiled at the choice of your words and you felt your chest tighten a little at the sight of his smile. You dug out your phone and saw that the lunch break was almost over. You both would have to rush to your own classrooms if you didn't want to be late for the class.

"I gotta go, the class is starting soon." You said and you felt honestly bad for leaving because some part of you wanted to keep on talking with this young man. The two of you seemed to have pretty much in common so you kind of wanted to get to know him a little better, even if only a little.

"Ah, I understand…" Genya nodded and the two of you put your empty lunch boxes away but before either one of you left, you collected your courage and looked at him. "Um… Genya?"

"Yes?"

"Would you, uh…" You blushed a little, "Would you like to exchange phone numbers? Like, if you would like to eat together or such?"

Hearing you ask for his number made the rough-looking young man blush furiously. He was shaking as he nodded pulled out his own smartphone from his jacket's pocket and handed it to you so you could input your phone number in it and you copied him, handing him your phone.

Once you had both put your numbers in each other's phones, you handed them back and you smiled a little, "Thank you. See you tomorrow at the same time?"

"Y- yes!" Genya nodded and you both left and went your own ways so you wouldn't be late for your classes.

The rest of the day, you were actually in a kind of good mood. You still got annoyed by your foolish classmates, but it bothered you a little less when you thought about your new friend.

[fenharael]

Top 5/10 Soulsborne characters~?

In no particular order I present to you:

1. Mohg

Fucking badass monster with an impeccable sense of style. But aside from the purely aesthetic love for everything Mohg, he's probably the soulsborne character I feel most emotionally invested in. Others have said it better than me, but Mohg is complex and tragic. He's the son of the Golden Order, seen as cursed and defiled by his own mother and sent to live in the shadows essentially to carry the burden of her sins. He, like Morgott and everyone else, carry the consequences of Marika's actions on his body and in his behavior. His twisted sense of love is borne of his treatment and he unleashes it on the world in the form of blood and violence. The mother he choose for himself and the path he walks is a giant "fuck you" to everything that shunned him, all the while still trying desperately to emulate it and carve out a holy and divine place for himself. The fact that he chooses Miquella, the demigod most likely to succeed Marika and who bears her likeness (that we can tell), the demigod who makes a haven for the forlorn and mistreated, is so fucking sad. He literally takes what he never had by force and says "you WILL love me". He does this in a sense to everyone he encounters. Whether it's his intended consort or his followers. They are all compelled by bloodlust or force or some twisted love of their own to keep his company even as it destroys them. The fact that he transforms the Mausoleum complex into a sewer/swamp reminiscent of the shunning grounds is just salt in the wound. He's legitimately and desperately trying to create a world he believes is good and right (for him) (and possibly other shunned creatures) based on the only world he even knew and the only love he ever received. All of this sadness and tragedy and pain result in a DEEPLY screwed up individual who is quite literally a monster in every sense of the word, but at his core he's just a sad, scared child who wants to be loved.

2. White Maks Varré

Someone at Fromsoftware tailor made this horrible, disgusting man exactly to my tastes and every day I thank god for that. Ethically dubious doctor? Check. Bride vibes? Check. Gender? Check. Murdered? Check. Condescending and insulting but in a sexy way? Check. Violence but it's obviously a stand in for something sexual? Check. Pathetic, prideful, tries to kill you but is played by his own hubris? Check. COURTLY LOVE???? CHeck. I adore the contrasts in Varré's character and design. He was a man of medicine and healing before being corrupted by his own dark nature. He values love but it's sadistic and violent. He craves power, gave up EVERYTHING for the promise of it, all for it to amount to nothing at the end. He insults you by saying you'll die nameless and without ceremony, and at the end of it all he bleeds out alone and abandoned in a forgotten tomb to a dead god. Absolutely merciless Fromsoft 10/10. I'm obsessed.

3. Marika

I don't even know where to begin with Marika but I have a lot of emotions about her.

4. Ringfinger Leonhard

I'm a simple man. Sexy voice, mask, insults me, I'm all in. I love his design and I'm just a sucker for knight's devoted to their duty despite it ending in tragedy.

5. Fausefka/Imposter Iosefka

I debated this spot with Solaire because he gives me a LOT of emotions but I think I'm gonna go with Iosefka. Again, predictably she's a questionable doctor who experiments on her patients. But I'm just so curious about her? And I admire her in a way, she's uncompromising in her quest for answers, she needs to ascend, she needs to understand, and she'll do anything to find out. She may sacrifice countless innocents to understand the Eldritch Truth but hey, when it comes down to it, she's willing to go under the knife herself.

6. Solaire

7. Valtr

8. Ebrietas

9. Yorshka

10. Anri

[the-fourth-knower]

Sonic Underground: Last Resort: A Re-Telling Chapter 8

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 |

Aw heck I let my upload schedule slip! Anyways here it is, chapter 8!

More set up, a necessary part of any story.

Leisurely Strolls at noon, Philosophical Debates in evening

The sun was a quarter through the morning rise when Manic arrived at the village. It almost felt like a far cry from the village when they arrived the day before, when most people returned to their homes.

Where streets were abandoned the day before, now throngs of people crowded around on their way to and fro. Vendor carts lined the streets, the owners standing next to them announcing their wares or readying themselves for the day. And through it all snaked a green hedgehog, navigating the crowd with ease.

Man, city streets these sure aren't! This is almost too easy. And speaking of too easy...

Manic eyed pockets and purses all around him - the thief in him was oh so tempted to sneak his hand in and take off with a wallet. Or two. Three if he was ambitious. Then he shook his head.

No, Manic. Focus. You're not here for that, you got things to do!

As he walked by an apple cat, his hand slipped out from his side. An apple was snatched, and as fast as it went out his arm returned. Nothing against grabbing a quick bite to eat in the absence of breakfast.

“New toys, fresh from the city! The latest from Meteortech’s Pawny toy line! Fun for the whole family, 3 and up!”

“Need a gift for your special someone?” Weird, that voice sounded completely unconvinced of the hype it was supposed to sell. “Why not a golden egg, made from a real egg…”

Manic eyed the so-called ‘golden egg’ as he walked past. No wonder that the voice of the person at the ‘gold egg’ stall sounded unenthused.

Man, that stuff isn’t even real gold. And it’s Eggman? Pass.

He got a few feet away from the cart before his brain caught up to itself. Eggman?

He slipped back around, right behind a group heading the other way until he caught a glimpse of the cart. 

Sure enough, an Eggman logo squatted upon the cart like an unwelcome blemish on a wall.

Great, the place gets Eggman merch. But then we’re in Eggman’s territory, so of course they’d have it.

Manic turned around, continuing his pace down the road. He couldn’t help but notice that more than half the stalls were either Eggman or probable Eggman shell companies. Again, Eggman territory and all. But that knowledge did nothing to make Manic any less uneasy.

Then he heard something that made his ear twitch, and his skin crawl.

“Did you hear about the Resistance attack?” a middle pitched feminine voice said, cutting its way across the din of the crowds.

Oh boy. What’s that about?

Manic slipped against a corner of a building - a launder mart, it looked and smelled like. Leaning to the side against the wall, he saw the source of the voice - three ladies, seemingly middle aged, chatting away together.

“Oh yes!” the middle of the group said, a squirrel lady with a lower voice. “Didn’t they destroy a bridge recently?”

“I heard that it was a factory, myself,” the third of the group said, a dog with a highish voice.

“No no, it was a dock of some kind,” the first voice, a macaw, said. “Those were last week.”

The monkey lady’s face soured at that. “Ugh. They can’t leave well enough alone, can they? Always go and cause more destruction and chaos!”

“And make everything worse for us normal people,” the dog said, shaking her head. “Thankfully, the security forces are more than enough to drive them back into their hidey holes.”

“A shame they can’t drive them out for good!” the macaw said. The other two nodded their heads, murmuring agreements.

“Do these people think that the Resistance is that bad?” Manic said, too soft for anyone to hear him over the hubbub of the crowds in the street.

“Oh, and have you seen those latest cleaning robots?” the monkey woman said, changing the subject for the group.

“The Egg-o-cleaners?” the dog said. “Oh yes! Such delightful little things. You’d hardly think they’re from Meteotech!”

The macaw let out a huff. “Shame that they are so pricey, they’d make keeping care of the house much easier.”

Oh. Brother.

And here he was, getting used to the place. And they turn out to be… well. Not Eggman sympathizers, quite, but they weren’t opposed to the doctor. Just trying to thread the middle. And so blatantly falling for the man’s con schemes.

It was understandable, honestly. People enjoyed their stability, not upheaval. But not something that would work out long term - it was putting yourself at the whims of a madman.

Manic was not the one to think in the long term, though.

Alright. How do I find the others so we can scram outta here without attracting attention?

__________

In another part of the valley, Tails hovered in place, handing over his eyes as he looked around. So far, his searching failed to turn up any signs of Eggman’s contraptions, machines, or even likenesses of his mustached head. There were weird structures all around the valley edge, but he would have to look at them later.

“Okay - nothing over there,” Tails turned to look at another part of the valley. “Annnnd nothing over there.”

There was a sure lot of nothing but plants. Not a single bird in sight or sound.

In fact, now that Tails was thinking about it,  he couldn't remember seeing or hearing a single animal the whole them that he'd been in the valley. Insects excluded. In fact, any animal that was big enough to possibly power a badnik seemed to be missing.

Tails landed in a tree, wiping sweat off his brow as he pulled out the handheld. 

"Alright...so, no obvious Eggman signs," Tails said, tapping away on the screen and bringing up photos he took. "Except for the consipicious lack of animals..."

It was just on the corner of his vision. But it was there. The unmistakable sign of light reflected off a metallic surface.

“- of… Wait a second. What’s that over there?”

With no hesitation, Tals flew in closer. Landing in the foliage, he crept up to the source of the reflection. And what a source it was.

Row upon row of oil drums, nestled away under tarps. Each one proudly emblazoned with the logo of Eggman Industries.

“Oil drums! And they all have Eggman logos!”

Tails took out his handheld, using it to take a photo of the oil drums. Then he began a scan of the drums, checking on whether they were full or not.

“Hmm…” Tails furrowed his brow, staring at the readings on his screen. “Most of these are empty, but some definitely have oil in them!”

Tails put his hand onto his chin, going into full ponder mode. “So Eggman must be making the people here store his stuff. Or maybe just Stripes?”

“Hmm… maybe I should let Sonic know about this.”

Tails ran his finger across his chin, trying to think where Sonic could be at. Then he shook his head.

“No, I should check it out first on my own. Then I’ll let him know!”

Tails hoped out of the bush he was in, heading towards the drums-

Bwarp. Bwarp. Bwarp.

- and right into an alarm.

“Yipe!” Tails jumped up into the air with fright, tails bristling out. “Whuh oh! That’s not good!”

Tails leapt back into the bushes he emerged from, crouching down as peered out into the small depot. Maybe he should run now, but why not see if there’s anything else to be used as evidence.

Holes in the ground, before looking like the rest of the dirt around, slid open, out emerged a series of badniks. Slicers, Motobugs, Buzz Bombers, RhinboBots, Coconuts. The works.

“Eggman’s robots! That’s not good…”

It made sense - Eggman oil depot, Eggman robot guards. With how cheap badniks were, Eggman had no problem dispensing them to every outpost of his, no matter how small.

Tails waited for the badniks to fan out away from his hiding spot. Then, he crept back away from the depot - then took straight to the skies as soon as he was in a clear spot.

Okay. So. Eggman oil storage, badniks running around… Time to go find the others so we can plan out what to do! Just need to find them!

Wherever they are.

_________

The tour went on for a while. Sonia learned a great deal of the village history, at least as colored by Stripes. Much of it sounded fantastical, if she was honest - a giant wild honey badger saving Oasis Valley with all you can eat honey? Please.

Stripes now led her out of the village, down the main stream that dominated the northwest end of the valley.  The two passed by a large net like filter - Sonia wasn’t sure what that was for, but kept quiet about it.

The sound of rushing water was joined by something else - more water, but a low soft roar. She soon discovered the source, as she and Stripes walked out into a clearing.

“And here it is,” Stripes said, sweeping his arms out wide, “the gem of our beautiful valley!

Before them was a waterfall, far larger than the ones by the hotel. It emerged from an entrance in the valley wall, pouring forth down three pools before it landed into the stream. Sunlight hit the water, bouncing off into a brilliant shower of light on the surrounding area. Towards the left were some benches, no doubt meant for relaxation near the waterfall.

“Oh my! It’s certainly beautiful.” Sonia said in wonder, eyes wide at the sight before her.

“It is, isn’t it?” Stripes said, hand on his chin. “It’s been for as long as the valley has been, carving out its course while dazzling all with its beauty.”

Sonia nodded her head in agreement. However, there was something that seemed…off, about the waterfall. A few moments of staring rewarded her with the source of it - sand and dirt were piling around the areas the water dropped down.

That must be from the wastes around here…who knows what else may be in the water. Explains the filter earlier, at least.

But no need to bring that up, not when she was interested in something else.

“Must be hard, keeping it this pristine. Tell me, how do you do it?”

“We’re quite diligent in maintaining the beauty of our home.” Stripes strode over to a bench set up near the waterfall.  “It’s our main draw, after all,” he said, as he sat down, “we do need to fund ourselves somehow.”

“I see...” Sonia walked towards another bench, setting herself down in it. ”Are you running a tourist trap of sorts?”

Stripes let out a laugh, one that sounded hollow to Sonia’s ears. “We like to use the term, nature preserve.”

“Nature preserve, huh?” Sonia leaned back against the bench, keeping herself in a well practiced sitting pose. “Not sure if that’s quite the correct use for the word.”

“Perhaps not as it is defined, no. But… Well,” Stripes leaned against his bench crossing one leg across the other’s knee, “we live in interesting times, where many things that once were taken for granted must now change to fit the new realities.”

“The Eggman Empire.” Sonia said, careful to keep her tone neutral.

“The latest in a long line of the powers that be,” Stripes said, dipping his head in a small nod. “Whatever they say, everyone else has to listen.” A ghost of a frown - or perhaps sneer- flashed across Stripes’s face. “Or else.”

“And that is how you have kept your village intact, I imagine.” Sonia shifted her position on the bench, keeping herself up right as she observed Stripes.

“Indeed” Stripes said, staying reclined in his seat. Perhaps in an attempt to put her at ease. “And his tax rates aren’t too unreasonable.”

“You understand that he changes his mind at a whim, correct?” Sonia set her hands on her lap, keeping a gentle gaze on Stripes. “‘One day he’s perfectly fine taking your money, the next he might be evicting you to create space for a personal pool.”

“I’m aware that he is capable of such actions.” Stripes was sitting up now, both feet set on the ground. “And on the other hand, so long as we don’t provoke him, then the chances of that stay low.”

“Stripes, my good sir!” Sonia raised her hand up to her mouth, at first glance in surprise. Though in truth, it was anything but.

“I did not take you for an optimist.” she said, letting herself lean back. She watched Stripes, keeping her gaze focused on his reactions.

“It’s realism, honestly.” Stripes said, setting resiting an arm on one leg as he shifted himself towards Sonia.

Sonia let out a hum, crossing her legs against each other. “It sounds more like trying to appease a predator with grapes, when you are the prey.”

“What else can we do, then? Do we try to fight against him, and ensure a swift retaliation upon us all?”

“I will concede that it is a fine rope walk to balance,” Sonia said. “but if at any time everything you have can be stripped away at one man’s whim, then should you not be prepared for the worst?”

Stripes smiled, raising a hand to adjust his glasses. “Been making it work so far. And I intend to keep it working - as long as I’m keeping the people of my home safe, that’s what matters.”

“But at what cost?” Sonia moved her legs, setting both firmly on the ground. The back and forth was drawing to a head - she felt it in her instincts. “How long until they realize they’re caught in a trap?”

“As long as we’re alive and our homes safe, being ‘trapped’ is not so bad a thing.” Stripes looked straight into her eyes, his own hidden by the shades he wore. “Would you not agree?”

There it was. The barbed question, one meant to probe into her loyalties.

She could lie of course. Give an answer that was a half truth or falsehood, like she so often did amidst the noble intrigues she grew up amongst.

It would be easy.

But she was not the same Sonia as back then.

“When one is beholden to the whims of a megalomaniac?” Sonia gazed back unflinchingly at Stripes. “I simply cannot agree at all.”

“A poor stance to have on such things, Miss.” Stripes’s voice went down an octave, a brow raised. “I hear many are taken for more innocuous things.”

“Maybe. But at least I actually have the guts to fight for their sake, and everyone else's.”

Before Stripes could respond, a beeping sound came from something on Stripes’s waist. He glanced down at it, then back at Sonia.

“Pardon me, Sonia.” he said, standing up from his bench. “One moment.”

Sonia stayed where she was as Stripes walked away. As he did, she noticed what Stripes failed to - Manic waving at her from behind one of the many trees around them.

The fact he was here, and Stripes just got a call…

Oh no… what did he do now.

Stripes seemed to have a scowl as he re-entered the glade. If it was there, he smothered it down by the time he reached Sonia.

“Apologies, but something just came up.” he said with a bow to her. “It requires my urgent attention. I must leave you now.”

Sonia nodded at Stripes, then gave him a small smile. “I hope that it’s not Eggman making a surprise renovation announcement for here.”

Stripes frowned at Sonia, before turning to leave. He looked over his shoulder, fixing her with the corner of his eye - a rare chance to even see his eyes.

“...I urge you to rethink your life. What you’re on now will bring you only pain and misery.”

With that, Stripes looked away from Sonia, striding off like he was on a mission.

[uselessidiotsquad]

have 4, 6, 9, and 14 from the gw2 asks for riag, mayhaps? :) @kerra-and-company

Ty for the ask! Riag hours it is. 4. Assuming they're a commander, how close were they really to Destiny's Edge? To Trahearne?

He had mixed relationships with Destiny's Edge but most of them were okay to good. If 1 is Fight on Sight and 10 is Besties -

Caithe: 6 - being another Sylvari has benefits even if their general manners of doing things are opposites (he does not do subtlety)

Rytlock: 8 - he and Rytlock see eye to eye in many regards and they know each other to be excellent fighters

Logan: 4 - didn't really understand the extent of his obligations to the queen and was largely influenced by being on such good terms with Rytlock on his perspective on Logan

Eir: 5 - about neutral, sympathized about her feelings of responsibility and guilt but not much beyond that

Zojia: 3 - did not get along with her and thought that she tried too hard to make herself look clever

Trahearne (before he realized he caught feelings): 8 - respected and looked up to his death magic usage as well as relating to having a Wyld Hunt that feels impossible

(After catching feelings) 6: Listen Riag's dense as mud about this stuff and made a point of trying to avoid him to hide his awkwardness which made them not get along quite as well since Trahearne assumed he had overstepped and offended him.

(After realizing feelings were mutual) 10!

6. They're now a heart NPC/part of a string of quests. What does that involve?

I had a couple of thoughts about this! Under the cut to save people's dash.

Part of Riag's therapy for recovering mobility in his hand was writing, which the Menders asked him to do and he found absolutely stupid. He didn't have anything to write about so they asked him to write letters to people that he didn't have to send, just whatever he wanted to say to them. Or whatever he was feeling.

As you can imagine a lot of them were heavy, angry or downright upsetting. There are even some that I could consider halfway as The Note™.

I think the string of quests would start off by finding the letters in some strange hidden chest in the Grove, and then trying to mystery style figure out who they belonged to. Not delivering them but trying to work backwards through the context of the messages to figure out who wrote them. Taking the player through lots of zones kind of parroting the player story's high points. It would be a loooong quest chain. Not hard just taking you all over the map.

But when you get to the last few notes, the earliest ones, they're just entirely unreadable and the handwriting is abysmal. Sometimes it's nothing but a page of angry scribbles. It's supposed to build sympathy and investment in him as a character, but I can see how people would get annoyed with the quest.

Once you'd collected all of them you'd be given a choice. You'd have to choose who you think wrote the letters and if you got it wrong, it would be a failed quest (a cd of a day before you can try it again).

Choosing the right person would mean you go hand over the collection of letters (probably apologizing that you read them). Then discussing what he is doing now that he's retired, he'd tell about his life some, and that he gardens now. You'd get a reward of an account bound scythe that makes you harvest plants twice as fast, with a chance for bonus loot!

9. What's an au for them you think could be fun to explore?

The one I had worked on for a while before abandoning is a SwapAU. So using my main canon, replacing the roles of Trahearne with Riaghael. The reason that he returns would be via Grenth magic instead of Melandru magic, thus making him very much look like one of the Awakened Sylvari that you see in Elona but Grenthified instead of Joko'd.

I dropped it because I had too many projects but it was fun to work on. He would have taken back over as Commander and Ruby would have been a part of the Pact but had less stress still. Even though it is initially more ouchsome it actually had a happier conclusion. Riag would have been functionally soundless but not had to worry about his Hunt being a c- er being a pain. Ruby would get to do what she wants to do.

14. Biggest misconception about them?

Man I'm not sure, there's a few. I think the main one is that he's Just A Jerk when he's really not. It's a defense and a damn convincing one. It's both to keep him and others safe, in his mind, so better to not let them in at all. I was actually chatting with someone else about this and how it's sort of a self fueling cycle that he is in.

General assumption is that he is a pissy, grumpy, asshole that doesn't like people and wants to be left alone.

What it is happens to be:

Unpredictable circumstances can set his brain back into Survive At All Costs mode -> avoiding situations that can cause this -> get less accustomed to them because he avoids them -> when it does happen it's worse -> so he avoids people further

People only pick up on the 'he doesn't want to be around others' part of it and avoid him in return -> unable to engage with people on the level he knew how -> further isolation and bitterness.

Most people (in the Grove, Pact, etc) miss like the whole alphabet and stop at Q.

Misconception from others that I've encountered is either they think he's just Jerk archetype or Sadboy. While he can absolutely be an asshole at times, he isn't that All The Time or his natural state isn't that. And he's very very far from Sadboy, more ball of wrath boy that is utterly crap at handling the extent of his emotions.

[erigold13261]

Random HCs of Pav and Gayatri (applies to both canon and the NSpideR AU)

Pav and Gaya became friends when Gaya was singing. Pav fell in love with her voice! The others… were afraid of her though.

Later, they realized that Pav wanted to be like cool boy like Gaya and vice versa. They were both trans! They chose each other’s names.

Gaya’s dad immediately accepted her because it all clicked for him, the clothes, the rejection to cut her hair, her friends mostly being other girls… Her mother… didn’t. She just said it was going to be a phase, and ignored her wishes. She was also afraid of her daughter’s powers, which she had no immunity to.

inspector Singh decided to fight to get full custody of his daughter to keep her safe.

he somehow succeeded, and now Gayatri barely meets her mother. (She has abandonment issues and anxiety though)

seeing how Pavitr makes his daughter happy, inspector Singh considers Pav to be his secondary family.

now, they were both in elementary school and quite content, but as they got older, people made strange jokes around them saying that “boys don’t have feeling for other boys if they aren’t gay.” Turns out they were both mspec.

After the rock revolution, things got much harder for Pav. His peers teased him for being the cousin of Eve, and started to fear he would “Diva Realm” them

those fears became true, and he accidentally used his powers on them.

this earned him a recommendation to go to Nueva York.

Pav was miserable in Nueva York for the first few weeks, barely talking to anyone but Gayatri, via video chats every night.

Hobie reached out to him, and asked how Eve was able to master her powers while not going to Nueva York.

This is all I have for them now…

1). She had absolutely thought she hypnotized him at first and refused to talk to him or get near him. After a while though, when the singing would have OBVIOUSLY not been affecting him though, and he still tried to hang out with her, that was when she started to let him in closer.

2). Oh that's really sweet! I like that a lot!

3). I for some reason felt like Gaya's mom isn't around at all (either died or left, forgot what I wanted to go with), but if she is around I can definitely see her being like this. Possibly having Gaya be mute or extremely quiet because of no immunity to her voice like her husband ended up having.

4). Good for him! Keep his daughter away from that awful woman (especially if she did what I suggested in keeping Gayatri quiet).

5). Poor Gayatri. At least she has a father who wants her and is absolutely willing to fight for her.

6). At first I do see Inspector Singh being hesitant to let Pav around, but like you said, after seeing how happy he made her, especially after the divorce, you better believe he was doing what he could to make sure Pav stayed in his daughter's life.

7). For some reason I always read mspec as "male spectrum" and not "multiple spectrum/multiple-attraction spectrum" and so think it's specifically a term for gay men. Anyway, wouldn't they be seen as a "straight" couple, or were people just being total asshats and accepting Pav as a guy while denying Gaya the label of girl. That's probably what it was.

8). There's probably rumors that Eve poisoned Pav's mind or that Eve ran away to NSR because of Pav being born. Like truly awful shit to try and make Pav feel bad (as well as him being unhinged or crazy like Eve). Literally anything to try and get under his skin.

9). The fears coming true in that instance probably made even more rumors spread and the ones already around just got bigger/more "real" to everyone. Pav is in an absolutely lose-lose situation with no outside help really coming (other than Gaya and Nueva York's "help")

10). More like a "strong recommendation" that Pav and his family couldn't really fight against (though thankfully Pav actually believed in this company and so went willing and wasn't giving the traumatizing forced to go to Nueva York option).

11). And yea, even if he did go willingly, he would still be miserable because of the culture shock, loneliness, and overall situation her was in sucking the joy out of almost everything.

12). Pav hadn't thought about how Eve had mastered them, but that was enough to make Pav snap a bit out of his depression and think a bit. It got him talking with Hobie a bit and the this is probably when Hobie starts to hint that Nueva York isn't actually going to help Pav without fully saying it yet (Pav is still in shock from everything and Hobie wants to get his trust before outright saying how shitty Nueva York is and to not trust it)

[queen-haq]

Fic: A Woman Scorned - Part 13

Fic: A Woman Scorned - Part 13

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Rating: R for language and smut.

Words: ~3000 words.

Summary: You’ve been sleeping with Billy Russo for a few months now. Knowing his aversion to emotional commitments, you’re satisfied with your clandestine arrangement until you catch him having dinner with Dinah Madani one night. Then it finally dawns on you. It’s not that he doesn’t want to commit, he just doesn’t want to commit to *you*.

Billy may think he knows you, but he has no idea what he’s just lost...

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5   Part 6   Part 7   Part 8   Part 9  

Part 10   Part 11   Part 12

gif credit: @bilyrusso

Part 13

It was 8 in the evening and you were still in the office. You hadn’t accomplished much work today, your mind mostly focused on Billy. You were surprised by how quickly he’d been able to make the funeral arrangements for his mother. Yesterday you had driven over to the nursing home and by the time you reached there, Carla Russo’s body had already been picked up. You’d signed a few papers for Billy and picked up the remainder of Carla’s things before you returned home. Everything of hers was packed into a small suitcase and sitting in your living room. You wanted to call him, ask him how he was and offer your support, but he seemed determined to do everything on his own when you’d talked to him last and you didn’t want to intrude.

You gave yourself a mental shake, reminding yourself to concentrate. This workday had been a wash. When you weren’t distracted by thoughts of Billy, you were putting out fires in your team. At least the personnel conflicts have been temporarily resolved, but now you needed to work on a slide deck that you’d been tasked with presenting to the executive leadership committee later in the week.

An hour later you were halfway done with your presentation when your phone rang. You glanced down at your screen to find Billy’s name on the screen. “Hi.”

“Hey.” He sounded exhausted. “You still at work?”

“Yeah. How did you know?”

There was a pause. “You give off the workaholic vibe.”

You smiled to yourself; at least he was okay enough to crack jokes. “How are you?”

“You mean am I grieving over a goddamn dead woman who preferred meth to her own fucking son?” He sighed. “No big loss. I’m fine.”

Anger and hurt saturated his voice despite his attempts to sound unaffected. Your heart hurt for him, you wished there was something you could do. “Do you need anything?”

“The funeral service is tomorrow.” A beat of silence followed. “Do you want to come?”

“Sure. What time?”

“2pm.”

“I’ll take the day off. Do you need my help with anything? Maybe I can call some of her friends?”

“When I found her she was living on the streets, barely alive but still hooked on meth. I doubt she’s got any friends.”

“What about the people in the nursing home? Maybe they want to come?”

“No, I don’t want anyone else there. Just you.”

Not liking the warmth that spread through you upon hearing his words, you reminded yourself he was probably feeling unusually vulnerable. This wasn’t typical of him.

“Do you want to come over?” he asked.

You exhaled a heavy sigh. “I would but I have so much work to do. I’ll be here for another hour at least.”

“Come over after you’re done.”

“It’ll be really late.”

“That’s fine. I can wait.”

“I can stop by my place to pick up your mom’s-.”

“No, it’s okay.”

You realized he wasn’t quite ready to go through Carla’s belongings yet.

“Bring your stuff with you.”

“Stuff?”

“Overnight bag, clothes for tomorrow, whatever.”

“Oh. You want me to stay over?”

“Yeah, might as well. We can drive over together for the service tomorrow.”

“Okay.”

Despite the conversation coming to a natural end, he wasn’t hanging up. It seemed as if he was reluctant to be alone, probably because that meant dealing with the complicated emotions for his mother. You knew exactly how that felt. “If you want, I can leave now. I can work from your apartment instead of the office.”

“You’re not worried I’ll be tempted to spy on Valiant stuff?” he teased.

You smiled. “As if I’d let you see what I’m working on.”

“Guess no corporate espionage for me tonight.”

“Still going to keep you away from my laptop.”

He chuckled. “Just get here. I promise not to bug you while you work.”

“Okay. I’m leaving now.”

“See you soon.”

After you hung up, you started gathering your things together.

***

An hour later, you were at his place. When he opened the door, you immediately grew concerned at how tired he looked. Traveling back and forth from Vegas plus dealing with the news about Carla’s death within the last few hours meant he was absolutely exhausted.

“Hey,” he greeted you, smiling as he took the overnight bag from your hands.

You removed your heels while he took your bag inside his room and then made your way to his living room. While his penthouse suite was much bigger than yours, you actually didn’t like it very much. Despite the high-end finishes and the beautiful interiors - Billy had obviously hired a designer to make the place look good - it always felt very cool and inhospitable to you. It was too perfect and you always felt out of place inside the suite.

“You hungry?” he asked, coming up behind you. “I ordered dinner for you.” Arms encircling your waist, he dropped a kiss on the back of your head as he maneuvered you to the kitchen. He’d laid out the food for you on the dining table, and from the take-out containers you knew it was from one of your favourite Indian restaurants. The thoughtful gesture surprised you, you weren’t used to that from him. Noting that he’d only set the table for one, you turned around to look at him. “You’re not going to eat with me?”

“I ate already. I was starving. Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry.” You cradled his face with one hand, your eyes roving over his beautiful face as he placed a kiss on the fleshy part of your palm. “You look exhausted. Did you even sleep?”

“No” He leaned back against the kitchen counter, weary. For a moment he closed his eyes, simply holding still, and you found yourself wrapping your arms around him in a hug. You didn’t understand why you’d even initiated the embrace – hugs were never your thing – but seeing him so beaten-down you were desperate to comfort him. He leaned into you, his body flushed against yours, and you held him tight. Stroking the nape of his neck, you placed a soft kiss on the center of his forehead. “Why don’t you take a nap while I work?”

“You don’t mind?”

You smiled up at him, running your fingers through his hair. “At least I don’t have to worry about you stealing my company secrets while you sleep.”

He smirked. “You’ll be here when I wake up?”

“Yup. Probably still working away.”

Billy grazed your temple softly before dropping a tender kiss on the tip of your nose. “Okay, but eat first.”

You nodded your head, watching after him as he sauntered out of the kitchen and disappeared down the hallway.

Sighing, you went to the sink to wash your hands before eating.

***

It was after midnight and you were still working on your slide deck when you heard Billy puttering around in the bathroom. Soon he slowly made his way towards you, dressed in a t-shirt and black boxers, his hair all messy. He yawned lazily, falling onto the other end of the couch.

“I thought you’d sleep through the night,” you remarked.

“Are you still working?” he asked.

“Almost done.” You saved the file and shut off the laptop before slipping it back inside your bag.

Suddenly he pulled you closer and you found yourself tucked underneath him on the couch as he glanced down at you from above. “You work too hard.”

You smiled up at him. “They don’t pay me the big bucks to sit there and look pretty.”

A slow, incandescent smile curved his lips. “I would. If I ran Valiant, you’d be my personal stress relief. You’d be in my office the entire time and do nothing but look pretty and service me.”

“That’s sexual harassment.”

Billy shrugged his shoulders. “Whatever. I’d make it worth your while.”

You laughed, angling up to kiss him. “Your breath is all minty fresh.”

“I brushed my teeth for you.”

“Wow. Be still my heart.”

A warm grin covered his face as he shifted down your body to nuzzle your neck. His weight was heavy as he rested atop you, but you liked the solid feel of him on you, the way you felt all safe and warm. You stroked his hair while he drew lazy circles on your chest, the silence between you two comforting.

“No one knows about her. Not Frank, not Curtis, no one.”

Those names were familiar to you because Billy had mentioned them in passing a few times. Of course he’d never shared any other info, but you being you, you’d dug around and found out more about them. You knew they’d served with Billy and he considered them his closest friends.

“When I found her three years ago, I put her in that home and forgot all about her.”

“You visited her every week,” you reminded him.

“Because I wanted her to regret abandoning me. I wanted her to see how far I’d come, I wanted to throw her mistakes in her face. But I don’t think she regretted safe-havening me, not even a bit.”

The bitter pain in his voice made your heart hurt for him.

“Maybe I should be happy she’s finally dead, or maybe I’m supposed to be sad or something.”

“How do you actually feel?”

“Nothing. I feel nothing.”

“Billy, I think that’s normal. There’s no right or wrong in this. All of your feelings are valid.”

“Even if her dying made me absolutely ecstatic? You wouldn’t think I was a fucking psychopath?”

“You are a psychopath but not because you have conflicting emotions about your terrible mother dying. You have the right to feel how you feel about her, whatever that might be.”

Eyes blazing with emotion, he hovered about you to meet your gaze. “Then what makes me a psychopath?”

You quirked your eyebrow. “The fact you want to torture my dates.”

“Not just torture, I want to kill them.” Eyes darkened, voice velvety-smooth, he covered your mouth with his and ravaged you with a kiss that left you thrumming and breathless.

“Only you’re allowed to touch me?” you asked through labored breaths.

“Yes.” His voice was a lustful rasp, his mouth leaving a heated trail as he sucked on the oh-so-sensitive corner of where your neck and shoulder intersected. Sparks of electricity ran down your spine. “Only me.”

You took his hand and guided it down your body, parting your thighs for him.

Like always, you were soon completely lost in the erotic pleasure of his mouth on you. Your legs hooked over his shoulders, your hands grabbed the back of the couch for support as he fucked you with his hands and mouth, sucking you, licking you, his tongue flicking over your clit until you were keening under him. Body arching off the couch, you moaned his name louder and louder until he drove you completely over the edge.

Then you felt a light slap on your cunt which immediately brought you back to reality. Opening your eyes, you found Billy perched between your legs, gracing you with the most wicked smile. “That’s one.” He slapped your pussy again, this time his long, lean fingers ever so slightly grazing your clit and your hips bucked, wanting more. “As promised.” His eyebrow quirked up. “Punishment.”

“Not fair,” you protested. “I’ll date who I want.”

He slapped you again, a little harder this time, but then he leaned down to place comforting kisses on the very spots he assaulted and you moaned with pleasure.

“All of you.” His tongue lapped over your clit, eyes locked with yours. “Belongs to me. I own you.”

“You don’t!” You squealed when he flipped you over unexpectedly, grabbing you by the hips so your ass was lifted of the couch. And then he squeezed your butt cheeks, biting them lightly before he started rimming you.

***

After sharing a shower the two of you were laying in his bed, your back pressed against his chest as you both stared up at the ceiling. His one hand was intertwined with yours, the other arm circled around your hips. The two of you didn’t have sex but you didn’t mind. You were both fatigued.

“I smell like you now,” you murmured, realizing the soap in his shower had left its scent on you.

“I know. I like it.” He squeezed your fingers. “I have a present for you.”

“I hope it’s not earrings again.”

He chuckled. “No, not earrings.”

“What is it then?”

“Jewelry.”

You turned back to look at him. “What? Like a necklace?”

“Something like that. Except I’m the only one who’ll see you wearing it.”

“Ah. And where is this gift?”

He kissed the top of your head. “Not here yet.”

You smiled to yourself. “People usually wait until they have the gift in hand before telling others about it.”

“I couldn’t wait. I’m excited to see you wear it.”

He stroked your hair, and your eyes grew heavy. Soon you started falling into deep slumber, feeling calm, comforted by Billy’s arms around you.

“What happened with your family?”

Your eyes flew open. Like always, any mention of your family unfurled anxiety within you. You didn’t like thinking about them letting alone discussing them. “They passed away.”

“They’re dead?”

“Yes.”

“Both of them?”

“Yes.”

He pulled you up so you were facing him now, his intoxicating gaze completely focused on you. “That day when I asked you about the pictures, you said you weren’t close to your family.”

“I meant my extended family. I don’t keep in touch with them,” you replied smoothly.

“What were your parents like?”

Irritation surged through you at his obtrusive questions but you had to remind yourself he just lost his mother. He was feeling out-of-sorts, working through his grief – even if he didn’t think so – and he was reaching out to the only person in his life that knew about his mother. “Normal.”

He simply stared at you for a long time, studying you, saying nothing. “Normal,” he repeated, finally breaking the strained silence.

You shrugged your shoulders, dropping your gaze to the base of his throat so you didn’t have to hold his piercing stare. “Yup.”

“How did they die?”

“Car accident.”

“You miss them?”

“Of course,” you lied.

He reached out to cup your face, his thumb stroking your cheek. “So you grew up with great parents, white picket fence and all that bullshit? Sounds like you had a fairytale childhood.”

“Can we talk about this tomorrow? I’m really tired.”

“Sure. I’ll add this to the list of all the other shit we’ll talk about someday.”

He sounded almost angry with you and you weren’t sure why. Before you could question him, however, he pulled you close so you were snuggled against his chest and the warmth of his body was enough to silence your brain and lull you to sleep.

***

It was a cold, crisp autumn day in New York. The outdoor service, attended by only you and Billy, was short and quick. Throughout it, he’d gripped your hand even though he’d been outwardly calm and collected. Even now as he stood a few feet away from you, impeccably dressed in a black suit, his dark eyes hidden behind a pair of aviator sunglasses as he stared out at the pond, you sensed he was a complete mess inside. You didn’t know what to say to him so you simply sat on the bench, both of you in an isolated corner of the garden. Eventually he came to sit beside you, taking your hand in his.

“I’d have given her the whole world.” His voice was filled with pain and longing as he removed his sunglasses and tucked them in the upper pocket of his suit. “I would have given her anything she ever wanted.” Billy’s eyes met yours. “If she’d just wanted me.”

You scooted closer to wrap your arms around him, breathing him in as he sunk into you. His hands caressed your back, his grip on you so tight you almost couldn’t breathe. After a while he rested his forehead against yours, his eyes holding you prisoner in front of him.

“Swear to me you’ll never leave.”

“Billy-”

“Promise me!”

“I can’t.”

“It wasn’t a fucking request, Y/N.”

You tried to pull away from him but he fisted the back of your hair, holding you in place.

The raw urgency in his voice played havoc with your emotions. If you closed your eyes, just for a moment, you could shut out all the doubts in your head and simply believe him - but you could only live the fantasy for a short moment before reality forced its way back in. “You don’t mean those words, Billy.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because you don’t feel that strongly about me.”

His eyes narrowed, glaring at you with hostility. “You’re gonna tell me how I feel?”

“I’m not what you want.”

“And what do you think I want?”

You gave him a sad smile. “The best of everything. Best car, best clothes, the most beautiful women in your arms. You want all that because you need others to want what you have.”

“Is that so wrong?”

You shook your head. “No, there’s nothing wrong with that – except I don’t fit into any of those categories. You want a woman like Dinah Madani. I’m not her. So eventually this thing between us will end.”

His jaw was set in a grim line, eyes burning bright with rage. “So you have me all figured out, huh?”

“Don’t get mad. You know it’s the truth.”

He yanked you closer, crushing you against him. “It’s been me against the world for as long as I can remember. But when I look at you.” His eyes softened, mouth parting as his dark gaze roamed over your face. “I don’t feel alone anymore.”

Your heart melted. The tenuous handle you had on your self-control disintegrated completely. You closed your mouth over his, kissing him frantically as he picked you up and straddled you across his lap.

He pulled back to look at you. “You’re my home. You’re all I need.”

Part 14

A/N - As always, all of your feedback, comments, asks, likes and reblogs are deeply appreciated. They truly inspire me to keep writing, so thank you from the bottom of my heart.

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[neoculturetravesty]

We met in online class - Part 9

Image adapted from here.

Pairing: Renjun x Reader Genre: College AU, romance, angst, fluff Warnings: Strong language, fist fight, a character has Covid-19 Word Count: 5.2k

Navigation: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | You are on Part 9 | Part 10 | Last Part

A/N: So proud of the boys for breaking records with Hot Sauce 🥺💛  Also, Eid Mubarak to all who celebrate!

Renjun is ashamed to be surprised, but his friends remain true to their word.

That night, Renjun slept for what he’s sure was a good fourteen hours. Because by the time he woke, it was way in the afternoon. Jaemin was already back from his shift and Jeno was almost halfway through his. Jisung had insisted that Renjun get some more rest before he had to take over. It was a tiny bit disconcerting to have Jisung hovering over him the entire day to make sure he was eating and feeling okay, but Renjun had to admit--this was exactly what he needed. He didn’t like who he was when he was alone.

The boys had apparently even created a dedicated group chat where they would post updates and a list of things that were required at the hospital. Not that there was much required, anyway. But the boys would make sure that at the very least, Renjun’s mom had fresh clothes and home cooked food everyday while she couldn’t get out herself. Jaemin had even taken Renjun’s phone and gotten it fixed so he at least had a proper screen instead of a cracked one.

Even when Renjun was sure that he could take over on his own, the boys wouldn’t allow it. On many occasions, he had just stayed by them during their turns, thankful for their company and their friendship. Because who else in this world would spend their semester break in this fashion? He’s pretty sure they had plans; but they had forsaken them all to be there for him. 

Renjun has no idea how it happens, but slowly and surely, things start to get better. He’s pretty certain it has to be some sort of a miracle. Like a little break of sunshine had finally decided to shine on him through the dark clouds. Like somehow, his guardian angel had decided that it had slacked off for long enough and now it should give Renjun a break. Because one day, the doctors tell them that Renjun’s grandmother will be a lot weaker for the next few days to come… but with a lot of care and attention, she should be ready to go home. They echo Renjun’s thoughts and tell them that it is nothing short of a miracle, but also that he should be thankful that his grandmother is still young and has a fighting spirit.

The day she is taken off of life support and brought into another room with a window through which he can see her, Renjun can’t hold himself back. He hugs onto Jaemin so tight and cries happy tears, and Jaemin holds him back just as strong, though he’s sure that he’s so overwhelmed by relief that he’s putting all of his weight onto the boy. But Jaemin doesn’t relent and holds onto him and lets him cry tears of joy into his shoulder.

The boys head home that night and laugh till they cry and celebrate Renjun’s grandma’s life and health. They eat like they had been hungry for days and slump their shoulders in ease like they had been keeping them tense for too long. They laugh and they sit together and keep letting out long sighs of relief, as if each breath was undoing a knot in their chest. It’s a sweet, victorious sort of a happy moment, and it is Jeno who has to remind them they need to focus now more than ever so that Renjun’s grandma can get her strength back and finally test negative. And it is an important reminder because the new semester is about to begin soon and given classes, they will have to redo their hospital visit schedules.

At the very least, they learn that the new semester would begin online, because the sudden surge in Covid cases had led them to another lockdown. Renjun’s not sure whether he should be happy or upset about it. On the one hand, he thinks this lockdown should’ve happened earlier so his grandma would’ve never gotten sick in the first place. On the other hand, he is happy that his grandma would now be safe and recover comfortably. 

When classes begin and Renjun finds all his housemates at home, his heart drops a little and he wonders if he should just skip today. But an amused Jeno mutes himself during his online class and stops him.

“You have other friends, too, you know?” Jeno cocks an eyebrow at him.

“Yeah, but I’m sure they have classes, too. Plus, the four of us have been doing this from the beginning, so… I don’t know…” Renjun says, rubbing the back of his neck, feeling a bit nervous about leaving his mother and grandma on their own without help. But Jeno looks at him like he’s talking gibberish.

“Dude. Not the four of us. All seven of us have been doing this from the very beginning.” Jeno says, eyebrow still cocked, looking at Renjun like he’s sure he’s lost his mind.

Renjun looks up and for a moment, he is sure his face looks dumb. Because if the buffering wheel was a human expression, Renjun’s certain he’s wearing it now. “All… seven?”

“Do you even check the group chat? Chenle and Mark and Donghyuck. They’ve all been doing their duty from Day 1, you idiot. How else would the rest of us come home so early?” Jeno scoffs and laughs a bit, knotting his eyebrows at his clueless friend.

For a moment, Renjun is silenced. Because he doesn’t know how to process this information. He feels a swell in his chest. A sort of happiness that only true friendship brings. But at the same time, he feels an incredible pang of guilt, because for one, he is an asshole that keeps underestimating the said friendship. And for the other, he had done absolutely nothing to be deserving of such love. 

“Dong… Donghyuck, too?” Renjun asks and he feels his heart breaking, though even in this surreal moment of realization, he recognizes how strange it is to feel heartbreak over something like this.

“Of course, you idiot. Donghyuck was the one that stayed at the hospital the entire first night when you were asleep.” Jeno tells him and smacks him lightly on the head.

And for the first time in his life, Renjun actually feels what it is like to have his head physically hang in shame. “I don’t deserve it.” he sighs.

“I really don’t understand you sometimes, Huang Renjun.” Jeno says and turns his attention back to his class.

“What do you mean?” Renjun retorts.

“Just because friends have a dumb fight, doesn’t mean they abandon each other in times of need.” Jeno states like it is the most obvious thing in the world.

It should be simple and obvious, everything Jeno has said. But to Renjun, it is groundbreaking. Because Renjun wasn’t used to being loved and cared for without condition. In his dark and convoluted view of the world, everything was give and take. You scratch my back, I scratch yours. But here they were--his friends that were shattering all of those dumbass beliefs. Telling him that although he had been a grade A asshole and punched them in the face, they understood that he was going through some shit, and that taking care of his sick grandmother trumped all other childish grudges. Renjun realizes that perhaps, he was the most childish out of all his friends. Somewhere in his turbulent childhood, he might have skipped a lot of emotional development. Because why else would the kindness and love of his friends shock him so?

Jeno peeks over the top of his laptop and watches Renjun deep in thought, paying no attention to his own class. “He’s at the hospital right now.” Jeno says knowingly.

And that’s all Renjun needs to hear before he slams his laptop shut and makes his way out.

The fact that Renjun is probably a few steps behind in his emotional development is solidified when he sits next to Donghyuck on a park bench and suddenly finds himself at a loss for what to say.

The rush of blood and adrenaline he had felt in his veins leaving his house for his apology tour seemed to have faded when he saw his friend’s face. Donghyuck had been sitting next to Renjun’s father, but that hadn’t been the bothersome part. It was the fact that his friend was sitting there for him, but with a black eye that Renjun had given him. 

In the grand scheme of healing black eyes, Donghyuck definitely looked less hurt than the last time Renjun had seen him. The purples were mostly gone, leaving behind hues of yellow and a speck of blue here and there. Though he may have been healing, there were more colors on him than before and that’s what made him look worse. That’s also the part that makes Renjun feel most ashamed. His friend was here for him even though he looked like shit thanks to him.

Renjun is sure that on the list of top ten assholes of the world, he would find his own name on top.

But sitting next to Donghyuck outside in the fresh air, he has no idea what to say. He thinks real hard and decides to start in the safe zone.

“Did the guys tell you? About my grandma?” he asks.

“Um, no. It was Jimin.” Donghyuck replies awkwardly.

Renjun nods. “I, uh… I told the guys like a day later, though. Did you tell them before I did?”

“No, um… I was at a party with the 127s… I didn’t see her text till like the next day either, so…” Donghyuck trails off.

Renjun nods again, then swallows. It’s so strange, how awkward this all is. It is unsettling because Donghyuck is the least awkward person he knows, and he hates that this weird zone is where their relationship seems to be heading.

Not if he can help it.

In another rush of dumbass adrenaline, Renjun gets up abruptly and stands before Donghyuck.

“Go on. Do it.” Renjun says and takes a deep breath.

“Huh?” Donghyuck looks at his friend quizzically.

“Do it. Just make it quick.” Renjun nods with determination and points at his face.

“You’re crazy.” Donghyuck states and slides further away on the bench, eyebrows raised, and a grimace on his mouth.

“Just do it, man. Do it so we can move on.” Renjun says, placing both hands on his waist and squeezing his eyes shut.

“I’m not going to punch you so you can move on, you psycho.” Donghyuck’s face is contorted, like he’s scandalized and perhaps even slightly scared of his friend. 

“Come on, Donghyuckie. Just punch me and get it over with.” Renjun waves his hand impatiently, not relenting.

“Are you not hearing me, you crazy? I’m not punching you just to make you feel better!” Donghyuck almost yells.

And because Renjun is pretty sure this would work, he grabs at Donghyuck’s collar just to provoke him.

“What the fuck?!” Donghyuck tries to push Renjun off of him.

“Hit me!” Renjun shouts.

“No, are you fucking crazy! Get off me!” Donghyuck grabs at the sleeves of Renjun’s jacket and tries to pry him off. 

“Not till you hit me!” Renjun insists, clinging onto the boy, grabbing and pulling at him to annoy him best he can to get a reaction.

“I’m not going to hit you!” Donghyuck yells. The two boys spin in inelegant, rough circles on the grass, trying to push and pull at one another.

“Punch me or you got no balls!” Renjun yowls and then finally feels the blow to his face that sends him flying to the ground.

He pauses for a bit because his head spins for a solid ten seconds. He shakes it vigorously to get it to focus and it helps because then he looks up to find a very startled and distressed Donghyuck looking down at him, fist still raised in the air.

“That had more throw than power.” Renjun comments, massaging his jaw.

“Yeah, that’s what I was going for.” Donghyuck agrees. 

For a moment both boys nod and look at each other, acknowledging the technique and form of the punch. And then, they burst into laughter because fuck, all of this was so stupid. Renjun rolls on the grass and Donghyuck doubles over as he stands. Then he offers Renjun his hand to help him get up, which he takes eagerly, using it to lift up and fling himself into his friend’s arms. They hold each other strongly, thumping one another on the back. And just like that, the awkwardness is gone. All that was meant to be said has been said and now Renjun is no longer struggling to find his words. They come easily, because all of this is so natural. He was with his best friend, after all.

“You are a crazy motherfucker, you know that, right?” Donghyuck comments, shaking his head as they sit back down on the bench.

Renjun chuckles, then looks at the grass, because his head hangs in shame again. “I’m a sorry motherfucker.”

Donghyuck puts an arm around Renjun and thumps his back again. “You should be sorry, you dumb fuck. But also, you’ve got a pretty toxic coping mechanism, you know that, right?”

Renjun sighs long “I know. The longer I think about it, the dumber I feel.”

He expects his friend to make a joke in return but he feels his hesitation. So he looks up and finds Donghyuck trying to think of what to say. “Have you ever thought about… like sorting that out, maybe?” he finally asks.

“Sorting it out?” Renjun asks, confused.

“Like... you know this isn’t normal, right?” Donghyuck asks, and he doesn’t sound like he’s mocking. His tone doesn’t have the slightest hint of a joke and that’s what makes Renjun realize what he’s talking about.

“No… no, I haven’t…” Renjun admits. He doesn’t know why he’s never thought about ‘sorting it out’. Perhaps because he’s always thought he was smarter than anyone who could offer him help.

“You could give it a try. Talking to someone really helps sometimes, you know? Getting help can help.” Donghyuck says carefully.

Renjun bites his lip. He knows his friend is right, but he’s never really, truly given it a thought. Donghyuck senses his discomfort and changes the subject.

“Your grandma is finally getting tested again tomorrow.” he says as he stretches.

Renjun smiles “Yeah. I honestly can’t believe it…” he looks at his best friend “... but I also don’t know if I’ll ever be able to thank you…”

Donghyuck frowns and shakes Renjun by the shoulder “Stop it before I throw up.”

“I mean it.”

“I’ll throw up even if you mean it.”

“Donghyuck…”

“Okay, really, stop. Also, I’m not even the one you should be thanking. Or apologizing to.” Donghyuck sits back after he’s had his fill of shaking Renjun.

“Of course, you’re the one I should be thanking and apologizing to, you stupid. You did all of this for me even when I was an absolute asshole to you.” Renjun presses.

“You are an asshole, but you’re also a dumb asshole.” Donghyuck declares.

“Hey, I’m trying to apologize nicely, here.” Renjun pouts and his friend lets out a long, exasperated sigh.

“I thought you were just being obtuse but you seriously don’t know…” Donghyuck shakes his head.

“Know what?” Renjun asks and Donghyuck shrugs and acts like a little shit which annoys Renjun, but at the same time fills him with relief. Because Donghyuck being a little shit to him means their friendship has been restored to its original state. But he asks again “Know what?!”

“Dude, no offense or anything, but did you really think your parents can put your grandma in a private room all on their own?” Donghyuck asks.

Renjun stops a bit. He’d been so worried about the fact that his grandma’s life was hanging by a thread that he hadn’t even thought about the expenses part. He knows his grandma had a little bit in savings, but his parents for sure didn’t earn that much. Come to think of it, he hadn’t even realized that this was one of the nicer hospitals around.

“Fuck it, I’m really going to have to spell it out for you. Since your brain doesn’t seem to be working.” Donghyuck sighs dramatically.

“What?”

“Dude. This is Y/N’s parents’ hospital. Your mother couldn’t possibly keep taking care of your grandma all on her own, now could she? When Y/N found out, she went crazy. She made her parents direct all their best resources into taking care of your grandma.”

For a while, the information hangs in the air.

Renjun had thought that he would never get to feel things that were new and unexplainable ever again. He thought he had experienced every single feeling his body had to offer. The past month alone had put him through more emotions than he had experienced in his whole life. He had seen it all, felt it all.

But what he’s experiencing right now doesn’t feel like gratitude or shame or longing or anything one should expect to feel in a situation like this. It just feels like a soft light has filled his chest and is lifting him in the air. He feels like he’s floating, like he’s having an out of body experience. 

“Oh,” is the only thing he can manage to say.

And then he remembers your face. He hadn’t realized it then, but he sees now how badly he had wanted to see you that night. He had wanted no one but you to hold him and kiss him and tell him that he wasn’t alone. And he remembers how he couldn’t tell you any of that. He remembers how you had walked away with another man. 

And that makes him come back to earth. He feels a resigned sort of sadness.

“Y/N is… she would do that for anybody, wouldn’t she?” Renjun smiles sadly.

“She probably would. But you should’ve seen how worried she was. Even now, she is on the phone everyday with her parents, making sure they’re doing everything they can. She didn’t want what happened to her grandmother to happen to yours.” Donghyuck tells him.

Renjun looks up “What happened to her grandmother?”

Donghyuck raises his eyebrows. “She passed away from Covid last year?” His eyebrows go higher still “She says she’s told you about this?”

Renjun thinks, and then it’s as if a veil on his memory is slowly but poorly being lifted. He remembers laying his head on your shoulder. He remembers feeling your shirt dampen from his tears. He remembers your fingers drawing relaxing patterns in his hair. He remembers your soothing voice, speaking to him with such tenderness that Renjun had barely heard your words and had focused instead on it’s sweet tones. But now, when Renjun is forcing himself to think, he very foggily recalls what you had been saying. You had been telling him about your own grandmother. Why hadn’t Renjun listened? Why did Renjun never listen when you spoke? He was such a selfish, arrogant fool. He wishes he could go back and change it all. 

Donghyuck shakes his head. “Are you really….” he sighs again, “Nevermind. But yeah, she basically went nuts because she couldn’t be here with you.”

Renjun’s heart is aching and he’s pretty sure his face reflects it. “I wish I could take it all back. Everything I did to her.”

“You can take it back.” Donghyuck says.

“How?” 

“Apologize to her, you dummy.” Donghyuck smacks the back of his head.

“How? I tried calling her once but she didn’t pick up.” Renjun admits.

“Then you should call her again and again and again till it sticks.” Donghyuck says plainly and it makes so much fucking sense that Renjun is embarrassed that he hadn’t thought it.

“Yeah, but…” Renjun swallows, “... it doesn’t really matter now, does it?”

“What do you mean?” Donghyuck asks.

“She’s with Wong Hendery now. So…” Renjun can’t even complete the thought.

“What do you mean she’s with Wong Hendery?” Donghyuck scrunches his brows deep in his forehead in confusion.

“She left with him for the semester break. I went to see her… but she left with him…” Renjun presses his lips together.

“Wait…” Donghyuck says and Renjun looks up and nods at him as if to confirm the fact. But he sees something entirely different on his friend’s face. It’s an expression of deep dumbfoundedness. “... are you some sort of an idiot?” He asks like Renjun is the dimmest person he has ever come across.

And Renjun doesn’t help his cause because he only blinks in return.

“Dude! She’s not ‘with Wong Hendery,’” Donghyuck gets up and smacks Renjun across the head once again. “They’re partners on the SMK Trainee Drive. She’s literally been preparing for this for months? Shouldn’t you know this?”

Renjun blinks some more. SMK Trainee Drive? Renjun had heard and personally seen you preparing for interviews and these drives. But somehow a lot of it hadn’t registered in his brain. Once again, probably because he never listened to you well. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, he was an idiot. He was the biggest idiot on the planet.

Yet right now, he was a smiling idiot whose heart was suddenly filling with hope. “She’s not… with… she’s not with Hendery?” Renjun is embarrassed. He feels so fucking stupid asking this, but he absolutely can’t help the smile spreading across his face.

“She’s literally at the tower right now. She’s been stuck because we went into lockdown whilst she was there. It’s why she couldn’t come and see you. But the highway doesn’t open for another week, so she’ll be stuck till then.” Donghyuck explains, and Renjun feels his heart exploding with joy at every word. He’s pretty sure he’s grinning shamelessly. 

“Why do I know more about your girlfriend than you do? Oh wait. It's because 'she's not your girlfriend.’” Donghyuck does a perfectly exaggerated mimicry of Renjun that reminds him of that one SpongeBob meme. On a normal day, he would’ve wanted to smack his friend for doing this. But in this moment, he is all too happy to be the one being smacked and mocked.

Renjun laughs with relief, then finds his laugh fading a bit. “Do you think she’ll forgive me? For everything I did?”

“I don’t know, man. But you wouldn’t know unless you try.” Donghyuck once again states something that should be obvious.

“How do I try if she’s not picking up my calls? And when she won’t even be here for another week?” Renjun sulks a bit but gets smacked in the head again.

“Dude! She literally did everything in the world to help your grandma, and she was in a wholeass different city! She did that all for you! I’m sure you can figure out a simple apology.” Donghyuck has his arms crossed and is now seriously looking agitated with him and it makes Renjun smile.

“She really did that for me?” Renjun asks and he doesn’t even care if he sounds like a cheesy motherfucker. He doesn’t even care he’s being this way in front of Lee Donghyuck who probably won’t let him live it down for the rest of his life.

“Of course she did that for you, you idiot.” Renjun earns another smack at the end of that.

“Does she like me?” Renjun asks like a stupid, hopeful teenage boy.

Donghyuck pretends to gag and moves away in disgust. But then he sees Renjun’s expression and lets out a long, irritated exhale. “Of course she likes you, you dumb fuck.” Renjun gets hit in the head, “Why would she do all of this if she didn’t like you?” Renjun gets another smack, “Oh Lord, please give me the strength to not commit murder. I am not your strongest soldier…” Donghyuck looks up at the sky and Renjun laughs openly, freely and lightly. He feels as if all the knots in his chest are slowly being undone one by one. So he jumps up and tries to tackle and cuddle Donghyuck but he keeps moving away. The two boys run around in the ground, Renjun chasing Donghyuck, trying to attack him with his love while he complains that his hair smells.

And Renjun accepts all his insults with a newly healed heart. You liked him. Despite everything that he’d done to you, you liked him. You had worried about him and done everything in your power to help his grandma. You had kept tabs on her and made sure she was healing even though you were miles away. You liked him, and you weren’t with a new guy and you liked him.

As he walks back towards the hospital with his arm around his best friend’s shoulders, he decides that if it came to it that he had to beg and grovel for your forgiveness, he would happily spend the rest of his life on his knees. Because you liked him and Renjun was never going to let you go ever again.

True to his word (for maybe the first time in your relationship), Renjun spends the rest of the week trying to reach you. Because his apology tour wouldn’t be complete without his most important stop--you.

He calls you so many times; but each time, he only gets to hear the dial tone and the mechanical voice telling him that the user is unreachable at the moment. You never pick up.

But his mind and his spirit is fueled by Donghyuck’s advice, and this time, the advice is a lot more sound and a lot less exploitative. So, Renjun doesn’t give up because he has to make it stick. You had never given up on him. He wasn’t going to give up on you. When he’s sure you won’t pick up his calls, he leaves you a string of messages.

‘Hey, Y/N. I’m trying to call you. Please pick up?’

‘I know you have every right to be mad at me, but I just need a chance to apologize.’

‘I’m seriously the biggest idiot in the world, but I need to tell you that in person.’ 

‘Okay, I’m coming to you.’

‘Turns out I can’t just negotiate with the police to let me cross the city lines to get to the girl I like.’

‘Y/N, please…’

‘I’m the world’s sorriest and the most embarrassed motherfucker and I need to hear your voice to tell you that.’

‘I am Berry-Berry sorry, and I’m just asking for one chance to get to talk to you.

‘I’m not going to stop, you know?’

He has to admit that his patience is wearing thin. Because he’s trying every method and none of it is working; and also because his pride had never allowed him to beg and grovel to anyone before. It’s a humbling experience, but at the same time, he doesn’t feel burdened by it. This was for you. The girl who had done everything in her power to make him fall. The girl who had given him more love and kindness than anyone else in the world had. The girl who had taken his troubles and worries as her own. So, of course, he had to do everything in his power to earn your forgiveness.

But as he’s sitting in his room, trying to call you for what he’s sure is the twentieth time that day, he hears that your phone has been powered off. For a moment, Renjun feels immensely dispirited. Maybe he had lost you for good. Maybe you never wanted to hear from him ever again. Maybe this is what he deserved.

But in the next moment, Renjun stops himself. No. He wasn’t going to let his mind spiral that way again. He had to think with a good, clear mind. He couldn’t sit around and sulk without knowing he had explored all possible options. He needed to get creative and for that, he needed to think.

He could certainly wait it out till the week was over and when you’d be back. But he wanted to spend each passing minute letting you know that he was trying. So, that wasn’t an option.

Maybe he could look at the map and find some loopholes and secret passageways across the city. Surely, some of them had to be unmanned so he could break the lockdown law and get to you? That would certainly be impactful, being locked up in jail as a grand gesture of an apology. But Renjun was no action hero.

Renjun sits and thinks and thinks and thinks till a light bulb finally goes off. Of course. A grand gesture. He yells into his pillow out of excitement and frustration that he hadn’t thought of this before. If one thing had been established during this time, it was the fact that Renjun was a dumb fuck with a penchant for being blind to the obvious. 

He gets up bright and early the next morning and rushes to see your friend at her apartment. He sits beside her as her online class starts, away from the camera view and finds his heart filling with the utmost warmth as he sees your window finally appear on the screen. Even in the tiny box, you looked so freaking beautiful that for a minute, Renjun stops and stares as butterflies take over his belly. But he taps his cheek to get himself to focus. He was here on a mission.

He waits for the class to begin before he slides himself into view next to your friend and types out a message on the chat that had taken him all night to prepare. He hits ‘Send to Everyone’ and waits.

And thankfully, the professor--miraculously the same professor who had done this the very first time all that time ago--stops to read it out,

“This might be a long shot, but Y/N L/N, do you think you can find it in your heart to give me another chance?” he begins, squinting his eyes slightly in confusion as he reads on, then smiling as realization hits. “Well, that’s certainly not a question from Ms. Kim Minjeong, I can tell you that.” he jokes and waits because as it had before, this has piqued the students’ interest.

Renjun watches as your pretty eyes widen. He watches them skirt across your screen, seemingly looking for the cause of the commotion. He watches the moment of realization hitting your pretty face. And he waits.

“Well, Ms. Y/N L/N, are you going to put the young man out of his misery?” the professor jokes kindly and Renjun thinks he might die from the anticipation.

And then, he watches as you move to unmute yourself.

“Yeah, I guess I could give him another chance,” you say nonchalantly which earns you a round of applause and hoots from all other windows. Because college students will always love dramatic antics.

The professor calls the class back to attention and Renjun sits back in his chair, grinning like an idiot because the girl he had fallen for had given him another chance.

Copyright © 2021 NeoCultureTravesty. All rights reserved.

[excelsi-or]

welcome to svt (pt. 19)

w.c. 1k (bit of a shorter one)

ch. 1 | ch. 2 | ch. 3 | ch. 4 | ch. 5 | ch. 6 | ch. 7 | ch. 8 | ch. 9 | ch. 10 | ch. 11 | ch. 12 | ch. 13 | ch. 14 | ch. 15 | ch. 16 | ch. 17 | ch. 18 | ch. 19

Jeonghan does a headcount to triple check that none of the kids got killed in action without him realizing. Since the conversation with Seungcheol, he’s paranoid that a hitman will take one of them out.

He stops when a hand goes out for his wrist.

She’s squinting up at him. ‘You okay? You seem on edge.’

Jeonghan studies her face, can suddenly see why Jihoon wants to protect this woman with his life. He blinks a few times to snap himself out of it. ‘Yeah, yeah. I’m—’

‘Lying,’ she finishes. She squeezes his wrist and then goes back to her laptop. ‘I get it.’

Jihoon walks up and sets a mug of chai next to her hand. He glances at Jeonghan and gives him a once over. ‘Good?’

Jeonghan wonders how bad his poker face is today.

‘I doubt the others would notice,’ she says; her eyes never leave her screen. Jeonghan worries that now she’s also become a mind reader. ‘We just got back from Japan. Still on high alert.’

‘And seemingly not done working.’ She seems to be scrubbing through video surveillance footage.

‘Everything fine, though?’ Jihoon asks as he sits.

‘I’m okay.’

Jeonghan moves to Seungcheol’s side. All the files are on the table. They’d worked on a PowerPoint of the information but had abandoned it, both worried that someone would hack into their network. Despite the reassurances from their IT team that there is no way someone could get in without them catching whiff of it. Regardless, Seungcheol and Jeonghan have been working at moving the company underground.

‘Right, I called a team meeting for a reason,’ Seungcheol begins.

They quiet down and laptops are closed as they give Seungcheol their attention.

When Jeonghan and Seungcheol exchange looks, she says, ‘We’re not going to like what you’re going to tell us, are we?’

The boys pick up on whatever she’d sensed.

‘Who’s dying?’

‘Is one of you dying?’

‘Did one of us die?’

She smacks Mingyu on the arm when she notices Soonyoung doing a headcount.

‘You’re right,’ Seungcheol sighs. ‘You’re probably not going to like what I’m going to say. I want to remind you all that you still have your out. I want you to know that that is still an option if you really don’t like what I have to say.’

The team exchange looks.

Seungcheol hums. ‘I didn’t want more copies of these files floating around, so I’m going to talk you guys through everything and then you can all have a look at the files afterwards, okay? If you have any questions, I want you to write them down, so you don’t forget them. But hold them until the end.’ He clears his throat, which has suddenly gone dry. ‘So…’

Seungcheol doesn’t hold back. He goes through the body clean up.

Jun gasps a little at that revelation.

He goes into the incriminating evidence, the police officer, LT and Taeyong. He’s straight with them. It’s the most information that he’s ever shared with the team before. Their job briefings aren’t even this in depth. A lot of the work at SVT has been learn as you go.

When he’s done, Seungcheol lets out a long exhale.

Jeonghan rests a hand on his shoulder and the boss backs away so that Jeonghan can take over.

‘Okay, kids. Questions. Ask them.’

Everyone’s hand shoots up. Jeonghan goes around the table asking them in turn.

‘Anymore?’

Everyone’s hand goes up a second time.

And a third time.

Jeonghan’s eyes home in on their sole female member, who hasn’t raised her hand, and also hasn’t made any comments. He catches her eye before he cycles through a fourth time. Luckily, less hands. ‘Nothing?’

She tips her head. ‘Nothing that they haven’t asked.’

‘Bullshit, but okay,’ Jeonghan retorts. He cycles around the table. This time, they seem appeased.

Then her hand goes up.

Jeonghan nods. ‘Yeah?’

‘Can I have the files first?’

‘Yes.’

Seungcheol gets up from his chair and slides the folder across the table to her. ‘Meeting dismissed. I’ll let you guys know more when we start planning.’

Seungcheol and Jeonghan leave the room whispering. The other boys watch her and wait for her to say something as she reads the file. It’s thick; full of papers, photos, and a USB.

‘Jardinier files,’ Jihoon murmurs.

She stands and looks around the table. ‘Information delegation?’

The boys wait for more.

‘Hao, Wonwoo and I still need to work through all of the hitmen. If Taeyong thinks there’s a leak, we still need to deal with that. Hansol, Seungkwan, you two take these Jardinier files.’ She slides the USB across the table. ‘I’m assuming that Cheol narrowed them down to whatever he needed. If not, ask them for the relevant information and cross check it with these.’ She slides the print out across the table.

She picks up the police file and slides it to Soonyoung. He catches it under one hand. ‘You two,’ she eyes Seokmin too, ‘go through this. Pick apart this police officer’s life. Why him? Why send the arm back? Theories, hypothese, weird dreams you have. Everything you can come up with that seems plausible.’

‘Chan, Shua oppa,’ she catches their eye over the heads of the people next to her, ‘police station layout. If we need to go in there, I think we’re a bit better suited than Cheol or Jeonghan oppa to figure it out. Don’t get yourselves thrown in jail.’

Jihoon catches her eye. She’s quick to give the rest of them instructions. ‘I need you, Gyu, and Jun to pull all you can on Taeyong. If Cheol’s hunch is right and he’s LT, confirm it.’

‘Timeline?” Mingyu asks as they all get up to leave.

‘Let’s meet again in three days. I think that Cheol and Jeonghan oppa have started moving us underground, which likely means they want this done ASAP.’ She scans the table. ‘Good?’

‘Yes, ma’am.’

‘Great.’ She turns to Wonwoo and Minghao who are already at her sides. ‘I need you guys to help me with the next guy. Johnny something.’

They nod.

Jihoon grabs her hand before she can jet off.

She tips her head in question.

‘Don’t get yourself killed.’

She kisses the top of his head. ‘You either, hmm?’

[remnantoforario]

7 Things I Want to See in RWBY Volume 8

So with Volume 8 being stalled because of the pandemic (though they are still working on it in increments) I thought about doing a post about things I would like to see in the next volume. This is similar to the “Questions I Want Answered in Volume 7″ before that volume came out, but this one will be more centered on the actual story and characters rather than the broader stuff I wanted in 7. These have no real order, just seven random things I want to see. Here we go:

1. More Varied Character Interactions

This is one of the bigger sticking points I’ve had with the show in general rather than a problem I had with V7 itself. It’s no secret that one of the biggest complaints about RWBY from even it’s most hardcore stans is the lack of interpersonal interactions between characters outside of their given pairs. Ruby only talks to Weiss, Blake only talks to Yang, Ren only talks to Nora, and vice versa. 

Yang and Weiss had moments in Volume 5, but when was the last time Ruby and Blake had a conversation? Volume 1? What about Yang and Qrow? A big part of his arc in Volume 5 was his alcoholism and Yang was nowhere near that. Ruby and Yang are also big offenders. Weiss and Blake had one small moment in the mine and then went right back to being perfect strangers. Weiss and Jaune haven’t “talked” since volume 2 (I don’t count their dialogue after she got stabbed in V5) and I can’t recall anytime Ren and Nora have ever had a conversation with Yang and Blake. These kids are supposed to be friends who have been through thick and thin together, but they seem more like strangers outside of their supposed “pairings”.

The preview with Yang interacting with Oscar, Jaune, and Ren gave me some hope. Hopefully the show continues it. 

2. More Information on Summer Rose

Volume 7 dropped the only notable information we’ve had about Summer since Qrow’s talk about the Silver Eyes in Volume 3, that being that Salem was likely responsible for Summer’s death. It’s now time to finally get more information on her. Who was she as a character? What was her semblance? What was her weapon? How did others view her? What is her connection to Ozpin? Why was she so important? How exactly did she die? I think some, if not all, of these questions should be answered in either this volume, or the next. We need a reason to care about her. 

One more important thing I would stress is that it needs to be Ruby actively searching for these answers. She shouldn’t have them handed to her, she should ask Yang and Qrow. Hell, if I wanted to get crazy I would just have a bottle episode with the three trapped in a bunker or something while Salem is attacking and all they do is talk about Summer.  Anything to highlight just why this woman who has been hanging over the show like a specter since the red trailer is so important. 

3. Give Yang Something to Do

Yang has been mostly directionless as a character since Volume 4. Her goal was to find Ruby, and that mostly carried her through V5, but now that they are reunited she’s mostly used to dress up the background or play will they won’t they with Blake (we’ll get to her) for ship bait. Put her on a path of wanting revenge on Salem for killing her mother (Summer), make her more worried about Ruby, or add her to Nora’s “defend Mantle” plotline. Something to make her an active character in the story again. 

4. Put Blake Back on track

Told you we’d get to her. Blake is an interesting character when you sit down and think about. In theory she should be the most compelling character with the deepest story arc, but she’s not. She was usurped by Weiss (who we will also get to in a moment) not long after Volume 5 ran its course. Her original course was to face her past, which morphed into taking back the White Fang from Adam, and then finally devolved into getting rid of Adam. Since then she has had little to no direction as well. 

Atlas is a hotbed for Faunus discrimination (as far as the show has implied) so I would like to see Blake get back to that. There was a slight moment in V7 with the mine, but that was quickly discarded. It would be interesting if she was able to rally the Faunus in Mantle similar to how she did in Menagerie.

Also, fix her hair. Come on, CRWBY. My girl out here looking like a used swiffer duster.

5. More Focus on the Schnee Family

A lot of people expected Volume 7 to be Weiss’ volume and its not hard to see why. The set up was there. She ran away from Atlas at the end of Volume 4 to find Winter, only to find out that her sister had been called back home. Now she was going back and not only would she reunite with her sister, she would also have to face her Father once more. Ultimately, this didn’t pan out and Weiss was mostly window dressing for what should have been the biggest part of her story. 

The other Schnees weren’t much better. Winter got some things to do, but it was more in service to Penny’s character than hers. Jacques remained the same. Whitley STARTED to get a character arc and Willow did little more than drink and a be plot convenience for Weiss. With Jacques now in jail and the company and family in shambles, this is the perfect time to give us something to latch onto with these five individuals. 

6. Character Conflict and Consequences

RWBY has had a nasty habit of late of pushing “protagonist-centered morality”. Meaning that no matter the situation, our main characters are always right and whoever opposes them is wrong (despite the litany of examples illustrating the opposite). This has to stop going forward. It only serves to irritate the audience because it makes it seem like the characters can’t make mistakes. Nothing they do has any lasting consequences or stakes. 

Team RWBY stalled Atlas’ defense plans against Salem by lying and unwitting sabotage, yet the story treated it as if they were in the right despite them offering no alternatives. Any attempts to speak against them were framed as “villainous”, turning once compelling characters into caricatures (Ironwood did nothing wrong). 

When it comes to character conflict, Ruby is always right. No matter what she says or does, her group falls in line no questions asked. That’s not natural. Someone should question her, someone should disagree with her methods and give a different perspective. 

Yang blistered Ozpin for lying about Salem and the Relic, but she was ok with Ruby doing the same thing to Ironwood? It made no sense and made her look like a hypocrite. 

Blake abandoned her friends, yet was welcomed back with open arms with little to no conflict. Even if the audience knew her reasons, her friends didn’t. For all they know she just up and left because she felt like it. Yang talked all this mess about Blake leaving, but didn’t keep that same energy when she came back. 

It’s ok for characters, for friends, to argue and disagree. It’s normal and happens all the time. Let them fight in the beginning of the volume, break up, and come back together in the end. Something. Maybe Ruby has a plan that Blake, Weiss, or sister don’t agree with and their clashing ideas split the group in half for a while. Then you can have the underlying narrative be them coming back together with new ideas to combat Salem when their individual plans don’t work. 

7. Give the Villains A Win

This is probably the most important thing I want to see. Salem and her forces are supposed to be the most evil group of people the planet has ever seen. A force of nature filled with killers, monsters, and madmen who want nothing more than to watch the world burn...but they haven’t posed a real threat since the Fall of Beacon. 

The show TELLS us Salem is a big deal, but until the end of Volume 7 all we’ve seen her do is sit in her tower and yell about Ozpin. She had yet to directly do anything that made our main characters want to stop her other than “she bad person”. Cinder has had more impact on the plot than her, and she hasn’t been useful since Volume 3. 

The villains NEED win this and the next volume. They need it so the writers can reestablish the stakes and make it so we WANT to see these bad guys defeated. Whether that be killing notable character off, taking the relic and Maiden powers, or dropping Atlas out the sky and destroying both it and Mantle completely, SOMETHING needs to happen to assert the villains dominance again in the plot.  

These are just what I personally want to happen in the next volume. I’m expecting them all to happen, but I least hope one or two of them do. We’ll see how it goes. 

[the196thbattalion]

star wars human! high school! au

i’ve seen so many headcanons circling throughout the star wars tumblr about high school au’s, so i wanted to share my bit with all of you :D

anakin skywalker

five words: REBEL CHILD ON A MOTORCYCLE.

he doesn’t like riding the school bus because it makes him feel extremely claustrophobic, so he scrapped and scavenged up parts to make his own customized motorcycle, which he lovingly dubbed artoo.

the blue and silver detailing was the joint effort of ahsoka and obi-wan, because anakin doesn’t know how to paint.

if he can catch up to the bus, he’ll ride alongside it and flip off the students on it before revving on ahead of them. (the freshmen think it’s the funniest thing in the universe)

probably one of the most well-known juniors in the entirety of temple high school (mostly because of his shenanigans but partly because he’s dating padme fuckiNG AMIDALA, PRETTIEST GIRL IN THE DAMN SCHOOL)

he always wears this worn-down leather jacket his mom gave to him before she passed away, and refuses to take it off, even though it’s somehow “a violation of the dress code and should be outlawed.”

his hair alone has seduced eight different students (boys and girls)

sometimes during study hall, ahsoka or padme will get a hold of his hair and style it into little braids or make a super rad ponytail.

he really likes iced coffee with milk and sugar. he puts in the milk to make it nice and light (it’s aesthetically pleasing, obi-wan!), and then like eight tablespoons of sugar to make it actually taste good.

his favorite class is mechanics, taught by kit fisto.

anakin spent months on a mechanical arm project to replace his clunky plastic prosthetic, and he was so freaking happy when it was finished; he almost cried. (he did cry and ahsoka got it on video)

obi-wan kenobi

a mixture of the soft™, pretty™, hippie™, grunge™, vsco™ and nerd™ tropes.

he really likes peppermint tea with lots of honey but takes his coffee black.

he has had too much tea.

someone needs to stop him.

almost all of his classes are ap courses, and if cody hadn’t been watching when obi-wan was making his schedule, all of them would be.

him, cody and padme have ap english with mace windu, and cody knows how much his classes stress him out, so he lets obi-wan sleep during class and sends him the notes

the only ap class obi-wan doesn’t take is mechanics, and he shares that class with anakin.

anakin and obi-wan are super close with each other. kenobi was there when ahsoka was adopted, and anakin was there when kenobi got his cat. (they were like 5 okay)

“NAME IT C3PO OBI-WAN, OR I SWEAR TO FUCK-” “what kind of name is that, and why would i - anAKIN PUT HIM DOWN!?”.

mr. fisto constantly has to split them up for disrupting the class, but it’s almost like they can communicate telepathically, and the teachers have a running bet

mace windu literally bet $50 on these fucking nerds so you know it’s for realsies

in reality, they’ve just gotten super creative with passing notes.

kind of off topic, but he has these brown harry potter glasses that he uses (kinda for reading???? but mostly so he can do that anime pushing up glasses thing)

cody thinks it’s the funniest shit ever

whenever cody is feeling stressed, obi-wan just does the thing™ and BOOM! happiness.

people think he’s a goodie two shoes, and honestly, it’s really easy to think that. if the iconics are trying to do something stupid, he’s usually the voice of reason.

but parties?

…

you know what, just ask anakin for the video footage.

ahsoka tano

this hs!au ahsoka tano turned me bisexual confirmed ✔

okay before i go into her style, which is mainly what made me drool over my computer, can i just put skatergirl!ahsoka out there?

spray painting of the rebellion symbol all over the bottom of her board and on items in a couple of the places where she skates the most (like the back of an abandoned car yard)

her instagram is filled with these super cool vhs-tape recorded skate videos (u know)

lots crackhead 3am visits (starring anakin, rex, kenobi and barris) to a gas station to get slushies and grind the shit out of the curb connecting the store to the parking lot

trying to teach anakin how to skateboard but he just can’t figure it out? uh yes

“try to balance skyguy!” “HOW DO I MOVE? DO I SCOOT? SNIPS THIS ISN’T FUNNY AND I WANT TO GET OFF – GUYS, STOP LAUGHING!”

okay okay okay i’m done

for now

anyway, her style???? is so???? fucking????? cool!!!!!

her genetics gave her a 80% of having vitiligo, so it really wasn’t a surprise when patches of her skin got lighter, but it still freaked her out a little bit.

basically, went like this: “DAD, I’M TURNING WHITE!” “???? oh my gosh ‘soka, no.”

she has long braided dreadlocks she dyed a super bright orange with various colored beads woven into them with the help of anakin and padme. she usually styles them into little space buns atop her head.

her entire clothing wardrobe consists of fishnets, neon bomber jackets, at least 11 bisexual beanies™, handmade patchy jeans, white tank tops, and light-up platform shoes.

she doesn’t give two flying fucks about the dress code, and – IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MOST BUSY HALLWAY - punched principal sidious over whether or not she “could wear shorts that short” (anakin may or may not have cheered when she broke his nose).

the fetts (chuck have mercy)

*cracks le knuckles* i’ve put it off long enough

we have: fox (24), wolffe (19), cody (17), rex (17), echo (16), fives (16), boil (15), waxer (14), hardcase (13), jesse (12), longshot (8), kix (6), tup (3), gree (2) and boba (9mo)

wolffe is off at college - fox already graduated and moved out, that cheeky little fucking shit - but both still keep in good contact with the fam, and it’s a constant clamor between eleven of the siblings of who gets to talk to them first

fox majored in government/politics, bly is majoring in space/astronomy, and wolffe is majoring in police/law enforcement shit (i don’t know how college works, so sue me)

cody and rex are juniors, and despite their similar looks, the amount of schoolwork each of them completes drastically varies

cody is the honor roll student, valedictorian, whatever you want to call it

rex kinda just either does the work really well or 9/10 times gets distracted by anakin or ahsoka sending him some nice spicy memes

cody tried to tutor rex but it ended up almost landing tup in the hospital

“that’s really simple, actually. if you – vod? rex, are you okay? what are you oH NO TUP DON’T PUT THAT IN YOUR MOUTH-”

fetts on the varsity football team is like a right of passage in the family

right now, only the juniors of the fett family are on the team, but the coach has eyes on fives and echo for next years team

SPEAKING OF

echo, fives and boil are the infamous sophomore trio that pulled the milk bucket prank on the gym teacher, pong krell.

they had to help the janitor (99) clean up afterwards, but they genuinely enjoyed 99’s company, because he’s rad as shit and knows all the secret school passageways.

to be honest, not one person (except maybe sidious) was complaining

that motherfucker makes everyone run like eight laps during gym class

even mr. windu gives them a small smile in the hallways after that

boil says he was blackmailed into it

waxer is a freshman (the poor dude, i’m so sorry), and he always looks out for the nervous freshies

if someone is having a bad day, he’ll give them a lollipop (he carries around a whole bag), a place to sit during lunch, and a shoulder to cry on

all you need to do to find waxer is to locate this long ass line of children

the school counselor, plo koon, sometimes brings his niece numa into school during the day because he can’t find a babysitter, and waxer. fucking. loves. her. PERIOD.

w+n pull these tiny little pranks on teachers, and the staff pretends not to notice, but numa always giggles and gives them away.

boil has a soft spot for numa too, and sneaks her rice krispies.

bonus shit i want to add in but can’t figure out where to put it (or i’m just gonna add it on and shit)

plo koon adopted anakin after his mother died (him and anakin’s mother were good friends), and found ahsoka on the side of the street, shivering like a maniac.

he doesn’t know where ahsoka came from, but he loves her so gOD DAMN MUCH.

he’s the school counselor, and still keeps in touch with a lot of students even after the graduated (he thinks that majoring in law enforcement/police is a bit dangerous for wolffe but he still supports his unofficial but basically son 100%)

yoda is the super old but radically rad english teacher.

his entire point of existence in my mind fic is to troll the shit out of palpatine.

a recent conversation starring yoda and palps: “did you give the students the mountain of extra work i assigned them?” “for the students, that was?” i’m sorry. my bad, that is.” “this is the seventh time, yoda.”

okay but for real

mace windu violently roots for the school football team.

“BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF HIM, CODY! YOU TOO...OTHER CODY!”

“THAT’S A HOLDING! THAT’S A HOLDING!”

“REF IF YOU DON’T COUNT THAT TOUCHDOWN THEN I SWEAR TO SAMUEL L. JACKSON I WILL COME DOWN THERE AND BEAT YOUR SORRY PINSTRIPED ASS!”

[katokathy]

About ADONIS Character Design

Not sure if anyone else noticed this, I thought it was pretty cool. It may just be my own speculation on Adonis’ character designs.

Mikuni Rei #1: His number is 1 and on his front shirt logo, in my opinion, looks like the earth at first glance. Symbolizing that we only have “one world”. The clip on his cloak looks like a morning star. What I think of first when morning star is mentioned is “Satan/Lucifer”. (Although I’m not religious so my speculation is probably incorrect). But morning star is mentioned in the bible for both “Satan” and “Jesus”. He plays the role as a savior or destroyer of the ideal world he believes in.

**Adding! Another user mentioned that to them, instead of the earth, his shirt symbol looks like a moon instead. Which definitely makes more sense! “The moon has 2 faces/sides, just as Mikuni does. An Adonis member and the son of the prime minister.”

Credulity: a tendency to be too ready to believe that something is real or true, especially on minimal or uncertain evidence.

Sanjou Keisuke #2: At first he was the only one where I couldn’t find a logo for “2″. But I noticed the two symbol on his shirt and it looks like a magatama. Which of course is similar to what we know, “Yin and Yang”. Good and evil. Sanjou was an ex cop who swore to law and protect. Then eventually joined Adonis to destroy. He’s shown to waver between the two sides. His shirt also has a lion dog image (or Japanese Komainu) which are creatures symbolized as guardians.

Corruption: dishonest or fraudulent conduct by those in power, typically involving bribery.

Uno Suzune #3: Her number is 3 and she’s wearing embellishments that symbolize a 3 leaf clover. Faith, hope and love. After her tragic past events, she desires those the most.

Craving: a powerful desire for something

Uno Shion #4: As Suzune’s twin brother, he also has a clover as his symbol but it’s a 4 leaf clover instead. Which adds “luck” to faith, hope and love. It’s seen on his hat, jacket and necklace. Coincidentally, the number “4″ is “shi” in Japanese, which also means death. Suzune also refers to him as “SHI-chan” for a nickname. There is an idiom, “to be (or to live) in a clover” which means to live a carefree life of ease, comfort and prosperity. Something that the Uno siblings have always dreamed of.

Dependence: the state of relying on or being controlled by someone or something else.

Souda Manabu #5: Souda has a 5 pointed star as a badge on his jacket. Also a star clip on his ponytail. The badge also says in English, “Oppose force with force.” Stars are represented as protective symbols and divine force. Souda is constantly referring to himself as “God” and is revealed to be protective/caring of his comrades in game. His keyword is loneliness, obviously for the fact that he has no one. Shunned by society, with only the “friends” in the digital world he seeks out to fill that void.

Loneliness: sadness because one has no friends or company.

Sugawara Rika #6: She has 6 pointed snowflake embellishments on her hair and coat. Snowflakes are symbols of rebirth and purity. Her keyword is fear from trauma of men and her stalker.

Fear: an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.

Sera Akito #7: His number is represented by the dice logo on his sweater. If you add all the numbers together: 1, 3, 5= 9. For 9 Executors. But only the 3 and 4  of the circles are more bold opposed to the 2 faded baby blue ones. So add that and you get 7. The number 7 is associated with luck and a dice symbolizes “Fate”. A roll can determine for you to achieve your destiny or it could make you descend further away from the goal. It will show whether you go to the “white route” or “black route”. Sera is shown to constantly hesitate between his path of good and evil and “You” decide his “Fate”.

Sin: an immoral act considered to be a transgression against divine law.

Kobayashi Hanako #8: Hana’s number 8 is shown on the 8 edged ribbon of her sweater. As well as the compass symbols on the sweater and stockings. A compass is means for “guidance”. Hana is a troubled girl who relies on Isshiki and his music to “point her in the right direction”. It’s said many times that his music helps people through troubled times and that they could relate to it. Rather than Zero, she regards Isshiki as her true hope and “Savior” which caused her to become obsessed with him.

Partiality: unfair bias in favor of one thing or person compared with another; favoritism.

Ogata Tomoki #9: Ogata’s number is 9 and is shown on his coat in the form of a fox. A “kitsune” in Asian culture is known to have 9 tails. He also says to Hoshino that he’s aware he has small eyes (which are often closed in the game). Kitsune have small, narrowed eyes and a cunning smile. His hair is also almost light blonde/silver in colour. They are known to be wise/intelligent but vengeful. A classic tale of the kitsune is when it disguises itself to have a lover/family. Until it’s true nature is revealed and is forced to leave the spouse and children, mirroring Ogata’s background. 

Greed: intense and selfish desire for something, especially wealth, power, or food.

Saeki Yuzuru #0: Saeki doesn’t seem to have anything on him to indicate his number because of course he IS “Zero”. Null, nothing. It may also be why his outfit is very simple too. However, his personal symbol seems to be the anemone flower. It’s shown on his chain, gun and cloak. None of the other Adonis members wears this. I even checked Kurose Shu’s cloak and he doesn’t have the design. The chain at his shirt collar is also a morning star (refer to Mikuni). Even Hoshino referred to Saeki as “like the Devil”. Anemone flowers are typically considered as bad luck and ill tidings. But of course the most famous connection it has is to Adonis, the Greek figure. (The organization name isn’t a coincidence!)

The origin of the flower was when Aphrodite wept over the body of her mortal lover, Adonis. The gods killed him over jealousy of their affair. While Aphrodite was crying, Adonis shed blood on the anemones that came from her tears and stained them red. In Christianity, red anemones symbolized the blood that Christ shed on the Crucifixion. Going back to the star at his collar; Lucifer is the Latin name for the morning star. Which is actually not even a star but, the planet Venus. Venus, the Roman goddess is equivalent to Aphrodite.

The flowers can also have positive meaning. Hoshino is constantly surrounded by purple or white anemones when with the main boys. Because those colours symbolizes “sincerity” and “protection from evil”. Red is Saeki’s colour, which means: death or forsaken love. The origin story about love and loss forever marked the anemone flower and made it a symbol of sadness in love. If Saeki had a keyword, I’d say it would be 

Forsaken: abandoned or deserted.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk of delusions. Saeki/Hoshino is Adonis/Aphrodite don’t change my mind lmao

[stillbandofbrothersthirsty]

As Far As Friends Go

This was kind of a transition chapter so cred’s to the show for the dialogue I used. But buckle up, shits really gonna go down next chapter.

Chapter 14 (Chapter 1; Chapter 2; Chapter 3; Chapter 4; Chapter 5; Chapter 6; Chapter 7; Chapter 8; Chapter 9; Chapter 10; Chapter 11; Chapter 12; Chapter 13)

Nixon - June 1944

The drop into Normandy was perilous. Just as Nixon had feared, nothing seemed to go as planned. It was as if the Germans were waiting for them to arrive based off of how much fire they experienced. Nixon, like most of the men, missed his drop zone but he was lucky enough to quickly link up with Battalion headquarters. It was a chaotic couple of first days in France as the airborne got situated in relation to the troops on the beach. Early into their arrival, Winters and the available Easy Company men took down some German guns. This not only saved a number of lives on the beaches but produced a map detailing German artillery positions. Looking at it, Nixon realized how important it could be. It couldn’t wait, so he decided to run to Utah beach to hand the map over to the higher ups who could do something with it. The run to Utah was only three miles, no worse than he had experienced during training. He was grateful though that Command decided to send the first two tanks that landed in to aid the 101st, thus providing Nixon with a ride.

He greeted Winters with a cheeky smile when he returned to the assembly area. “Going my way?”

Winters tossed his gun up for Nixon to catch, “sure.”

The men bunkered down for the night, scrounging for what food and beds they could find. The Battalion was on the move by June 8th on their way to take Carentan. As according to plan, the 101st forced passage into Carentan on June 10th and 11th. The days were hot and muggy, barely cooling down at night for the men dressed in heavy uniforms and equipment. Bugs were everywhere and exhaustion was setting in. Finally, they encountered the Germans. On June 12th the German’s were forced to withdraw and it seemed like victory was theirs. But Nixon was suspicious. Surely the Germans wouldn’t give up such an important position so easily; and he was right. On June 13th the 17th SS PzG Division counter-attacked. Thankfully, the U.S. 2nd Armored Division came in for support.

When Nixon returned to Battalion headquarters with news of their victory he found that Emily had finally arrived.

“Emily!” he wanted nothing more than to hug her in that moment. The last week had been exhausting. It was such a comfort to see her.

“Miss me?” she grinned up at him. Her smile was like a shot of morphine, he immediately felt his muscles relax. “You look a mess,” she shook her head.

“I’m sorry to disappoint you, we’ve only been taking Carentan.”

“Congratulations,” she said, “did you like the tanks I sent you?”

Nixon looked at her flabbergasted. Then slowly, through the haze of his fatigue, he realized she was messing with him. “Ha ha. It would’ve been impressive if you had.”

“Yeah I wish, unfortunately I’m not that powerful yet.”

Nixon slung his arm around her neck, “no but I bet you know where to find me some food.”

Despite his exhaustion, Nixon didn’t sleep well those final weeks in Normandy. Instead, his alcohol intake increased. He had to re-fill his flask every day, sometimes topping it off throughout the day. He would need to replenish his stores soon. But no one anticipated how long they would actually be fighting in Normandy. In fact, the 101st had expected to be relieved much sooner. Strayer kept asking for patrols as the allies attempted to inch their way closer and closer to Germany.

Twenty-five days after D-Day Nixon was sent out on a patrol with Harry Welsh. It was a reconnaissance mission so Nixon was required to go. What they were looking for he wasn’t sure. The regiment had exhausted their knowledge of the German’s position in the area so any new piece of information could serve as an advantage.

Nixon peered through a pair of binoculars from where he and Welsh sat in the brush approximately 100 yards from a run down building. “We need to know what’s in there,” Nixon said.

“I don’t know who the hell to send,” Welsh said.


“Ask for volunteers.”

“I hate asking for volunteers.”

Nixon gave Welsh a pointed look, “then pick them.”

Blithe, Martin, and Dukeman moved in towards the abandoned manor. The rest of the paratroopers sat hidden in the grass behind Nixon. As they waited for Blithe and the others to get into position Nixon spotted something poking out of Welsh’s backpack.


“Harry, what exactly are you doing with your reserve chute? You been hauling that thing around since we jumped?”

Welsh sucked his teeth, slightly embarrassed he said, “gonna send it to Kitty when we get back to England. Silk, figure it’ll make a good wedding dress, ya know, what with the rationing and all.”

Nixon broke view of where the trio was moving in towards the manor to laugh at Welsh, “jeez Harry, I never would’ve guessed.”

“What? That I’m so sentimental?”

“No, that you think we’re going to make it back to England.” Nixon peered through his binoculars again. His mind flashed to Emily as he watched the men crouch down behind an upturned cart. Bad news, he thought. He had suspected for a while now that Emily may have feelings for Welsh, a man who clearly was intending on marrying his betrothed. No matter how much he flirted, Welsh wouldn’t have bothered lugging that extra chute around if he wasn’t serious about Kitty. Bad news for Emily. Suddenly, a shot rang out.

“Covering fire! Covering fire!” Welsh shouted. Martin and Dukeman pulled a downed Blithe back behind the line. They passed Nixon who saw the blood gushing from the young man’s throat before Doc Roe got to him.

“Cease fire! Cease fire!” Welsh commanded.

Winters moved up from behind, “what happened?”

“Sniper,” Nixon said coming up to him.

Winters couldn’t take his eyes off the bleeding Blithe, “they’re pulling us off the front line.”

“Now?” Nixon demanded.

Winters turned to him, “to a field camp north of Utah beach. Hot food, and showers.”

With a last mournful look at Blithe, Nixon turned away to head back. Great fucking timing, he raged to himself.

Emily was at the camp surrounded by intelligence staff and nurses, who were busy at work tending the masses of wounded men.


“Nix?” her voice was gentle when he entered the intelligence tent.

“Couldn’t have let us know a little bit sooner? Sent the runner just a few minutes earlier?” he demanded.



“What are you talking about?”

“We were on a patrol and some kid is probably gonna lose his life because that information came a few minutes too late! I sent them in there, I told them to check it out but turns out we didn’t need to!” Nixon pounded his fist on one of the tables.

“Lewis I didn’t know, that information didn’t come from me.”

“You’re intelligence staff! You’re meant to know!”

“I’m not intelligence staff like you are! I’m no S-2,” Emily shouted back, “no one tells me anything!”

Nixon paced the room trying to calm down, “okay, okay,” he leveled his hands on the desk, “I’m sorry. I just -,”

“It’s fine, I’m sorry too,” Emily stood across the table from him, looking small in the dim light of the tent. “I do know one thing,” she said. He looked up, waiting for her to continue, “we’re going back to England.”

“Right, great.” And he stormed out of the tent onto the beach.

His insomnia didn’t improve even knowing that they were going back to a relatively safe zone. It was impossible to sleep with the sounds of men crying out all around and bodies held together by gauze and tape only paces away. Naturally, the night before they were meant to leave, Nixon couldn’t sleep. He grabbed his flask and made his way towards the dunes on the far side of the camp.

He plopped down on a ridge into a bed of marsh grass, the coarse tendrils tickling his wrists and neck. Nixon closed his eyes and inhaled. The whiskey he had guzzled earlier that night had seeped pleasingly through his veins. The summer air blew across the salty water cooling the sweat where it pooled around his collarbone and lower back. It was so peaceful. If it weren’t for the peppering of tents barely visible against the night sky, Nixon could have pretended he was there on holiday and not for a war.

When he opened his eyes, he saw a lean figure making its way up the dune towards him. Nixon braced himself for the quiet wisdom of Winters. However, the figure failed to grow as it approached him, only reaching a height of about 5′5″. The silhouette revealed itself to be Emily, dressed in another pair of slightly oversized O.D.s.

“What?” Nixon barked at her.

“I saw you pass by,” Emily dropped down beside him, bumping his arm on her way down. Disgruntled, Nixon scooted over slightly.

“Why aren’t you asleep?”

“Why aren’t you?” Emily retorted.

“Couldn’t.”



“Same here.”

Quiet fell between them, a comfortable quiet but Nixon could sense Emily wanted to say more. Finally, her lips parted and she said, “it’s not something you can get over.”

“What?”



“Seeing the men like that.” Emily searched his face in the dark for any reaction. Nixon stared straight ahead. “It’s disturbing and not something anyone should ever have to witness.”

Nixon licked his lips to speak, but all that came out was, “yeah.”

Emily paused, then reached for his flask. She pulled it from his grasp and took a swig, “It’s over for now. We have to find comfort in that.”

“Right, some comfort in that,” he took the flask back for another drink. They sat there side by side listening to the waves crash against the shoreline. As the night waned on, Emily began to doze off. Her head fell to rest on his shoulder. Nixon considered waking her to walk her back to her tent but then decided against it. He didn’t want to disturb her. If she woke up now who knew if she would be able to fall asleep again. Besides, he enjoyed sharing a little sliver of the world with her in that moment. A sliver that was simple and not perverted by violence.

When the sun rose, she stirred and they both made their way back to their tents for a desperate last few hours of sleep before they were to ship off. As Nixon was boarding the ship he saw Emily standing on the Mulberry harbor hugging a dark, thin woman dressed in a nurses uniform. The woman brushed wild hairs away from Emily’s forehead then pressed something into her hand. Nixon couldn’t help but wonder what that exchange had been about. Out of curiosity, he met Emily at the gangway.

 “Who was that?” he asked.

“Hm?” Emily pulled a paper wrapped candy out of her pocket.

“Who was that woman you were talking to? A nurse?”

“Oh yeah, that’s my friend Marwa.”

“I didn’t know you had female friends.”

Emily rolled her eyes and popped the candy into her mouth.

“What was that?” Nixon pointed to her mouth.

“Ginger candy, you want one?” Emily offered him a candy and Nixon accepted, beginning to feel like his old self again standing next to her.

[fanficsforheartandsoul]

Anxiety | [Fem!Reader x Obi-Wan Kenobi]

Inspired by a post by @bluegalaxygirl​

Notes: This is brought to you by my social anxiety and my thirst for Obi-Wan Kenobi, yaaayy. Also, I have literally no clue how to write feelings.

Fandom: Star Wars

Warnings: Angst, Anxiety, Self-Doubt, Self-Conciousness, slight OOC, Fluff

Summary: Y/N has only recently become Obi-Wan’s padawan and she is struggling with her social anxiety and her relationship with her master, so she has a panic attack. Luckily, Obi-Wan himself comes for the rescue.

Word Count: 3868

© Fanficsforheartandsoul

________

She knew that her master would most likely disown her if he found out what she was doing right now. Obviously. Because emotions were prohibited. But she couldn’t control it. Not at all.

Y/N had always been alone. She didn’t join the order when she was an infant. She had lived for 13 years on her own on a small planet in the outer rim. She didn’t even know the name of the ice planet. The life in the tundras had been lonely but she felt comfortable. With the help of the force, she was able to survive just fine. Then the Jedi came.

Master Yoda brought her to Coruscant, introduced her to the council and decided that she should start to learn with the other younglings. 

The first mistake he made.

Y/N had never met any children, nor any group that consisted of more than 6 people. Having companions was new territory and being exposed to a huge amount of people for the first had caused her to lash out with the force. By accident, she not only hurt some younglings but also herself. The scars on her arms and left cheek would always remind her of that moment.

That’s when the wise Jedi grandmaster decided to teach her the basics himself. Alone. To help ease her agitation. It was a good idea. Y/N did approve after all. She studied the Jedi, learned the lightsaber forms, meditated. She was a good student, and Master Yoda was proud of her. But then the Clone Wars started and he had no time for teaching her anymore.

So he made his second mistake. 

He decided that it was time for her to become someone’s padawan. “Why can’t you be my master?”, she had asked him, her voice void of any emotion but not because she learned to properly follow the code. She had just learned how to hide them. His answer left her intestines churning and she was ready to shut herself in her room. But the Jedi obviously didn’t let her.

“Your new master, this is.”

And that’s how she got introduced to Obi-Wan Kenobi. A formidable Jedi with great patience and a humorous character. A kind soul.

From whom she was hiding right now.

Y/N had been his padawan for two months but she didn’t progress far. Her training went well, that was not the problem. Since they were alone when they meditated or trained. No, the problem was her social anxiety.

Meeting the clone troopers for the first time caused the panic attack she was having right now. They were supposed to have a meeting for an upcoming mission but Y/N ditched them. Not intentionally she’d like to say but that would be a lie.

She had already stood in front of the meeting room’s door but she couldn’t enter. Her legs felt like jelly. The padawan tried to calm herself but it was no use.

Her heart was pounding loudly in her ears and she had trouble breathing. Her hands were clammy and she felt uncomfortable because she had broken out in a cold sweat. Footsteps were coming closer and she heard the voice of her Master from inside the room. A shaky breath escaped her lips and she whispered “I’m sorry” before she bolted.

She hid in her room. Not the best place of course, since he would probably search for her here, but there was no other place that calmed her down. Asides from Master Yoda’s side. But the council member was gone on a mission and he would probably also be disappointed if he found out about her panic attack.

Currently, she was leaning against her bathroom door and tried to meditate. But she couldn’t concentrate on her breathing because it felt like she was suffocating. “Don’t worry, Master Obi-Wan will understand”, she would tell herself but that only frightened her more. Because no way in hell would he understand! She had been living in the temple for 2 years but hadn’t met more than 8 people at the same time, not since the accident.

Every time Master Yoda tried to take her to one of the lessons with the younglings, her scars began to hurt. It wasn’t painful since she got used to it but it broke her concentration and seemingly also her spirit. Y/N couldn’t focus with the tingle that went up her arms and the force around her became unstable.

The same was happening now. She could feel it. The air around her felt heavy and made it hard for her to breathe.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

She choked the words and tried to hold back a sob from her throat. She wouldn’t cry, because she couldn’t. It wasn’t allowed. And the code was the only thing that stopped her from falling into misery. So she clenched her teeth and tried to stop whimpering.

But thoughts of her master finding her invaded her head and tears threatened to spill.

He would be disappointed. Y/N didn’t worry about him hating her, no. She wouldn’t mind that. But disappointing him was far worse.

She knew that Master Kenobi disliked the idea of having to train a new padawan shortly after Anakin Skywalker, especially during the times of a War. He never showed it of course. But somehow she could feel it. Maybe it was because she had always lived alone, only with the company of animals, who could show their emotions with the force. But she was able to feel to a greater extent than others apparently.

That’s how she knew. That he would most likely spare her a glance and then abandon her. It made sense. She was not fit for a Jedi after all. They were supposed to be the stars of the republic, the peacekeepers who helped every civilian. But this meant that they would be in the light. But her life wasn’t made for that.

She was always meant to stay in the shadows. Where the darkness was calming, reassuring.

Maybe she should just give up and leave. Going home, to her real home, on the unknown ice planet, seemed like a good idea. It was a welcome one.

Y/N didn’t realize how she spiraled deeper down in self-doubt and self-consciousness. But surprisingly she calmed down a little. The thought of returning to her house, that was actually an old transport ship, relaxed her muscles and she could breathe better again.

But then it hit her. She had no money. And in fact, she didn’t even know the exact location of her home planet. Master Yoda never told her. Maybe be knew that she would waver!

Dread fell over her and she let her head hang low. Maybe he never trusted her at all. And when he had enough he cast her aside and let another person take over the dead weight. How Obi-Wan Kenobi must suffer with her as a padawan.

Shame made her cheeks burn and the tears welled up again. But this time they spilled over. Y/N clenched and unclenched her fights slowly. Her fingernails dug into her palm and the pain distracted her from the salty tears that rushed down her cheeks. The scars on her left one throbbed.

Maybe, just maybe, if she curled up and stayed in that position, she would just fade into the darkness and everyone would forget her.

-

“Have you seen my padawan?”

Obi-Wan was currently walking back and forth in the meeting room, his hand thoughtlessly on his lightsaber while he worried about Y/N. He knew he didn’t give her enough attention and the guilt ate him alive but like Anakin assured him, he was busy with the war and her shyness wasn’t helping with that.

“Your padawan? You know we’ve never seen her face before”, teased Anakin and Ahsoka gave her master an annoyed look.

*No, but… A girl was standing before the meeting room when I arrived half an hour ago”, she replied and Obi-Wan immediately stood a little straighter.

“Did she have h/c hair? And a scarred left cheek?”

Ahsoka tilted her head and tried to remember. “I didn’t see her face but she had h/c hair, yes. But she walked off in a hurry so maybe it wasn’t her.”

Obi-Wan remembered how the young girl always stormed off after their lessons as if she was running from something. He was sure, the person Ahsoka saw, was his padawan.

Why did she walk away? He knew he told her that the meeting started at 1100. Did she forget something? That didn’t seem likely.

“I know your padawan isn’t here, General Kenobi, but we should start anyway. We cannot leave the senator waiting”, said Captain Rex and he nodded in defeat.

The meeting began and they discussed their strategy but Obi-Wan couldn’t quite focus. He remembered the first time he met Y/N. How her young eyes were strangely dull.

The girl was a little shy according to Yoda but he learned fast, that this comment had been an understatement. When they walked to their first training lesson she said nothing. No word left her lips and the Jedi had wondered if she disliked him.

But when they fought he realized that she was nervous. Her attacks were timid and had almost no force and he began to wonder if it was the right decision to say yes. After all, it was only an offer, Yoda didn’t order him to take Y/N as his padawan. He had to admit that he even doubted the grandmaster’s judgment a little. But the girl proved to him that she was a good student. Technically.

Her skills were sharp when she fought against a training droid, she used form four like Master Yoda which surprised him since it was an offensive style. But he never saw her do it when they fought against each other. He wanted to tell her that she could use Ataru but her apprehension also made him hesitate and he felt like he couldn’t talk freely to her. If he needed to be honest, it was a little uncomfortable.

It was strange that he had problems adapting to her but to be fair, Anakin had been completely different when he was her age. It wasn’t just because she started her training a few years later than him, it was also her character.

From what he had learned in the first month, Y/N liked to stay secluded and isolated herself from others at her age. She got embarrassed easily and he often felt like she was like a scared animal that would run away if he made a wrong move.

And there was something else. Sometimes the force would radiate from her. It was as if a pipe had been opened and all her feelings were flushed out through the force. He couldn’t explain why but he never told the Jedi council about her emotions. Obi-Wan told himself that they weren’t concerning but when he stood there in this meeting room with a bad feeling in his chest, he changed his mind.

“…ood, then let’s conclude this meeti-”

“Thank you, Anakin, I’ll see you later. Goodbye”

With these words, he walked out of the room.

As soon as the door closed behind him, he picked up the pace and decided to look for Y/N in her room. It was the only place that seemed to make sense for him. Hopefully, she would be there because if she wasn’t he wouldn’t know where else to look. This realization just showed how much he neglected her and shame and guilt made his heart heavy.

He decided that they needed to talk. It would be hypocritical to spill their emotions when they were supposed to not let themselves be swayed by them but this was about their relationship as student and teacher. He wanted to apologize from deep within his heart. Obi-Wan realized that he had been a bad master for her and he knew that it needed to change.

So he hurried to the south wing, where Y/N’s room was located. He walked up the stairs and as soon as his foot stepped on her floor, he paused.

The force felt weird on this level of the temple. Unease filled his chest and his hand found his lightsaber, since touching it always calmed him down.

His intuition told him the dread that filled the air had something to do with his padawan. He walked down the hallway and stopped before her door. The nameplate next to it was dark, which meant there were no lights on in the room. But he didn’t turn away. He could feel her presence through the force. She was here. And she was hurting.

Worry coursed through his veins and he knocked on the door.

“Y/N? Can we talk?”

He waited a few seconds but there was no response. He knocked again. This time louder.

“Y/N, please. I-”

Obi-Wan stopped and waited, hoping she would answer but the silence remained.

“I’m coming in, okay?”

He didn’t expect a response, so he wasn’t surprised when he didn’t get any. With the help of the force, he opened her door and stepped inside the room. Like the nameplate indicated, the lamps were off, but the big window let enough light inside for him to immediately see that she wasn’t here. She wasn’t laying in her bed, or sitting at the table studying, how he often found her when he was coming to pick her up for training. But the shift in the force was stronger than ever, so he knew she was here. The only place that was left, was the bathroom.

And not much to his surprise, its door was closed. He crossed the room and stopped before it. Now that he was standing so close, he was able to hear sniffles. The sound crushed his heart and he regretted listening to his former padawan so much.

Deep down he had known that what he was doing was badly hurting the young girl but he told himself it would be fine. He forgot how fragile and sensitive people were. Maybe the war had made him heartless. The anxiety he could feel through the force shook him to the core. He tried to steel his nerves but the emotions flowed through him and left his body numb.

“Y/N?”, he asked, his voice was soft.

He heard a breath hitch and the sniffles died down. She noticed him, now all she needed to do was talk to him.

-

Y/N almost died then and there.

He found her. Obviously. But she had hoped with the naive belief that he wouldn’t. She tried to suppress the sobs and quiet down but it felt impossible and honestly, she didn’t want to. There was a brief thought that she should just let it all out and show him how miserable he made her feel.

But the idea vanished as soon as it appeared. It wasn’t his fault. She was the one who was scared of other people, of interacting. It wasn’t normal, she wasn’t. He was just unfortunate enough to get paired with her.

“Leave me alone.”

Y/N only whispered it and it was almost inaudible but she was sure that he had heard her. He would definitely leave now. Leave her behind like her parents did, how master Yoda did, like everyone d-

“Let me in, Y/N. Please.”

Her heart missed a beat. Master Kenobi’s voice was soft and had a pleading undertone. She could sense genuine worry radiating from him through the force. Worry, guilt and also regret.

When she felt all these emotions, she couldn’t stop the sobs anymore. She pushed herself up and crawled away from the door. Maybe he sensed how she moved away, maybe he didn’t, but the door opened with the help of the force and she could see the blurry shape of her master standing in the doorway.

The light from the room shined in and outlined his features as if he was one of the republic’s posters coming alive. He looked like a savior. And the thought of him being that for her filled her heart with something she couldn’t describe.

He approached her and knelt in front of her. She could see his worried eyes through her tears and the warmth that radiated from his presence in the force. It felt familiar and surprisingly it made her feel like she was safe. Maybe she was allowed to cry some more. Maybe he allowed it until she calmed down and then he would just bring her to the counci-

“I won’t leave you alone anymore, Y/N. I’m sorry. I neglected my duties as your master and made you suffer.”

He held out his hand but paused as if he wanted her permission first to touch her. The padawan sniffled.

“I’m sorry.”

Obi-Wan saw that as a cue and lightly touched her shoulders. The moment when his fingers touched her robes felt like a storm abruptly stopped. She stared at him with wide eyes. He wanted to tell her that she didn’t have to apologize but she suddenly threw herself into his arms.

Y/N cried into her master’s beige robes and her hands were shaking while she hugged him but she didn’t care. She sensed it when he touched her. He genuinely wanted to help her, to ease her pain. And for her, who so desperately wanted somebody to understand her and lend her a hand, it meant the world.

The Jedi was stiff at first since it rarely happened that somebody threw themselves into his arms, but when he felt her shaking hands and how wet his robes got from her tears, he raised his hands and returned the hug. His left hand stroked her back while his right pressed her head closer to his chest.

“It’s okay. It’s okay, Y/N.”

The moment was intimate but he didn’t mind. If he could calm her down this way, he would gladly continue until she didn’t need him to do it anymore. Her body slowly stopped trembling and the sobs died down. Her voice was raspy when she said:

“I’m sorry that I didn’t attend the meeting.”

A small laugh escaped Obi-Wan’s mouth. He ruffled her hair and smiled slightly.

“Why would you worry about that? I found you having a breakdown in your bathroom, I believe we have other priorities.”

She nodded and looked up at him. Her eyes were puffy and her cheeks slightly red from embarrassment. He let go of her and Y/N backed away until she sat leaning against the bathtub. He watched how she fiddled with her fingers, unsure of what to say.

Her Master then noticed that the force around them had calmed down. The anxiety was partly still there but it felt like an echo. Y/N then took a deep breath and said:

“I’m scared.”

He looked at her but he didn’t say anything, worried that she would stop before she even has properly begun to explain.

“I- I’m scared of people. I can’t really explain why but meeting a group is really stressful for me. It’s… uh… It’s like I feel like everybody’s looking at me and judging me and I can’t, can’t handle that well”, she started and avoided eye contact with him.

“I’ve always been alone and suddenly that changed and now everybody’s expecting me to hang out with all those people and there are so many clones and their feelings and emotions are all over the place, and I get all sweaty and I can’t prop-properly breath and it’s just… I don’t know… too much. It’s too much for me. I’m not used to be in the spotlight. I know that sounds arrogant because I know that not everyone is looking at me and watching every move I make but I just can’t stop from feeling like they do. And I’m feeling all this fear and anxiety and I can’t handle them knowing that what I’m doing is against the code and I feel like a failure, I am a failure and it’s… Maybe Master Yoda was wrong. Maybe he shouldn’t have brought me here.”

Y/N knew she was rambling and when she finally stopped to take a breather she looked up and watched her Master’s expression and when she saw his confusion, she regretted telling him.

“This… I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything, let’s just forge-”

“Do you feel the same with me?”

Master Kenobi’s question made her pause and when she searched his eyes for any disappointment or disdain she couldn’t find any. His words left her wondering. Was she feeling the same with him?

“No…”, it sounded unsure, but she didn’t add anything because she really wasn’t completely sure.

“Let me try to rephrase what you just said, okay?” She only nodded. “Am I correct when I say that you have anxiety when it comes to social interaction?” Again, he received only a nod.

Obi-Wan touched his beard and pondered over what he had just heard. Many things made sense now. Why Y/N was always studying alone, why she ate in her room instead of the cantina and why seemed like she was dying every time he saw her in a room with more than 3 people. But he still didn’t really understand why she had problems with that.

He searched her eyes and when she returned the eye contact he smiled softly and then said:

“I can’t really understand you, but”, he held up his hand when she tried to interrupt him, “I want to understand. And I want to help. I’m sure that the force will guide us both and I believe that, as master and padawan, together we can face your fear and ease it.”

Y/N leaned back, her shoulders relaxed and she let out a breathy laugh. Sneakily she wiped away a tear that threatened to spill again.

“That would be great… Master Kenobi.”

The Jedi’s smile widened and he put up his finger as if he wanted to warn her.

“I would prefer it if you call me Obi-Wan, at least in private.”

The padawan nodded and together they slowly stood up.

“Let’s try”, she added and her voice was quiet but he could hear the determined undertone.

“There is no try, padawan, only-”

“Do or do not, I know that one.”

He raised an eyebrow and then patted her shoulder smiling. It felt a little awkward but then her master interrupted the timid atmosphere:

“You said ‘their emotions are all over the place’. Does that mean you can sense feelings? To what extent?”

Y/N paused. Him speaking about her ability made her feel shy again.

“Uhm… I can tell what a person is feeling without concentrating too much. As long as I want to know, I can sense it clearly.”

Since the light was still not on in the bathroom and he turned away, she couldn’t see his expression but she felt embarrassment radiating from him. Maybe it was because of the moment they had just shared but she suddenly wanted to tease him.

Yet she didn’t. Not wanting to destroy the thin thread of a bond that they formed today.