#but instead of consuming boring af stuff like.

[yoongihan]

Soooo what I’d been meaning to ask for was Han + ✊🏼 from the second prompt list, I feel that that might show a different side of him and I’d be curious to see you tackle that 👀

pairing: coworkerjisung x fem character

genre: fluff (but with a rather mean boss), workplace au

rating: PG/T (man, these drabbles are so sfw)

word count: ~1800

warnings: some belittling from a supervisor, a lot of internal thoughts on part of the mc, adoration of jisung (as per my usual), probably too much talking (it's my default writing style). I think this is pretty safe honestly. both jisung and mc are in their mid to late twenties.

a/n: my dearest @candlewaxandp0lar0ids. it's only after I've written this that I'm not even sure if he's actually being protective. so I'm sorry if I completely got this wrong. i heart you, though, and our random conversations that include just rambling about jisung.

original request post here

It's Just a Crush

Having a workplace crush is, in your mind, stupid as hell. You know it’s more than likely just because of proximity, the drama of meeting deadlines, late-night scrambles of finishing that one important project, and realizing you haven’t been out on a proper date in almost two years.

So, you recognize that your crush on Han Jisung is more due to circumstances than him.

Not that he isn’t a great guy. He works as hard as anyone on your team. He goes out of his way to lighten the mood, even when it’s way too intense because of the pressure of your bosses practically breathing down your necks. He never remembers anyone’s coffee order, but still buys an assortment of concoctions when it’s his turn to get coffee so that hopefully everyone can find something they like. He’s wicked smart and quick with ideas, and even when he zones out during the more boring practical stuff, he never minds when you remind him to pay attention. 

He usually blushes when you say something, but his smile is always bright.

He’s not always on your team when you have a project, but you are sure that when he is, the project turns out better. Maybe you just feel better. 

But it’s just a workplace crush. Other than the team sometimes going out for drinks after the final presentation, you’ve never spent time with Jisung socially. Usually, you sit across from him at the bar, knowing that more proximity will just make you crush on him even more. Not that getting to see his expressions, how he listens to the others or when he occasionally glances at you make the crush any less. But surely, watching him is better than being near him?

You think you have this dumb af crush under control. Even when you have one too many drinks out, you haven’t said anything too revealing. Maybe you were a little flirty two weeks ago when you said something about his eyes. But everyone was talking about the best features on a person and though you have a long list for Jisung, you only mentioned his eyes. 

“How long have you worked here?”

You wish you were currently looking at Jisung and his pretty eyes instead of at your boss who doesn’t have pretty eyes, or a pretty smile, or any of the kindness that Jisung radiates. 

“Five years.” You state carefully. You aren’t stupid. You know by the tone of his voice that this is not going to be a fun conversation. 

“Five years. Five years and you do this?” He tosses the stack of reports at you. They land on your desk and the floor. The draft from the air conditioner picks up a few and scatters them. It’s going to be time-consuming to get it back in order. “It’s beyond subpar work.”

You aren’t sure how you are still looking him in the eyes even though you want to curl up and hide for a little while. Why does he have to chastise you in the middle of the office? Why is that public humiliation necessary? 

There’s a voice behind you, saying your boss’s name. 

“It was all of us, sir–”

You want to tell Jisung to hush. To not get into the line of fire. It’s not worth it. 

“She’s…” The boss points at you. “In charge. She’s lead.” He glares back at you. “Though I regret making that decision.”

It isn’t your first time in charge of a project, but you’re still relatively new as a team leader, and all the doubts you have when you’re named ‘in charge’ are justified with every word your boss says. 

“You always say that every team is as strong as the weakest link, sir. So if something is wrong, it’s all of us.” You don’t see Jisung, but you feel him. He’s left his desk (several yards away) and is standing next to you, his hand almost brushing yours. 

“Han…this conversation does not include you.”

“Sir. I looked over that project last, so if something is wrong, it’s on me.”

He’s lying. You glance at him then. He’s looking at your boss, so you only have his profile.

It’s a nice profile, nearly distracting you from why you turned to him originally. 

You delivered the statistics, the reports. You looked over them last. 

Why is he lying?

Your boss glares at both of you. “Just fix it. Before I have you delivering coffee instead.” And he turns and stalks off. 

It’s quiet for what feels like minutes, though it’s probably only seconds. Everyone eventually starts quietly talking and going back to work. The show is over. 

Jisung squats down to gather some of the papers. It jolts you (you were still staring at him) to do the same.

“You okay?” he asks softly. 

You swallow. Truthfully, and logically, you know this is not a big deal. This particular supervisor is more than often way too critical and dramatic. He’s not the ultimate boss, the one that decides your fate. You know that mistakes happen and mistakes aren’t life or death. 

You know all that, but you still kinda want to cry.

You don’t trust your voice so you nod.

He stacks the papers on your desk as you finish grabbing the last few sheets. You finally meet his gaze. 

The prettiest eyes, looking at you with concern. 

“Jisung, you didn’t have to–”

“Yeah, I did.”

“You lied.”

He shrugs, seeming content to stay in his squatted position. “So?”

You sigh before standing to set your stack of papers on top of his. He stands as well, his hands sliding into the pockets of his trousers. 

“If you get in trouble because you lied…”

He makes a face at you. “He doesn’t care. He just wanted to feel like he’s in charge, like he’s important.”

“He’s our boss.”

“He’s still just a person.” Jisung taps the top of your hand that is still resting on the flawed project. “I’ll stay late with you so we can figure out what’s wrong and how to fix it.” He rolls his eyes. “Because pointing out what is wrong is too much for him.”

“You don’t have to. I’m lead and it’s my responsibility–” You carefully draw your hand away from his touch. Your crush does not need the encouragement.

“Too bad.” He grins at you. “Still gonna help.”

“It’s Friday. I’d hate for you to stay here–”

“And I hate you have to, so again…too bad.” He interrupts you again.

You huff. 

His smile grows. “I’ll finish up what I’m working on and join you in a bit.” He walks back to his desk, eyes finding yours over his computer and he winks at you.

Dammit.

It’s eight at night and you and Jisung are the only people left in the building, minus security and the cleaning staff, though neither are on your floor. 

“I don’t see anything.” You say before letting your head fall to your desk. You feel a pat pat on top of your head. “Are you patronizing me?”

He laughs. “Maybe a little.”

You lift your head, aware that you probably don’t look your best. It’s the end of a long week, a very long day and your hair tends to like to lose whatever style you forced it into by this time of evening. 

He is also reading through the reports carefully, eyes going left to right, line by line. You must be tired because you don’t look away. 

Which you don’t realize until he says your name.

“Sorry.”

He glances up. “What for?” His cheeks pinken. “You gonna say something about my eyes again?”

“Did I embarrass you?”

He shrugs. “Not really. I mean, a little, but that’s on me, not you being nice.”

“Okay. I wouldn’t want to embarrass you, Jisung.”

He holds your gaze and you wonder if maybe you got it all wrong. Maybe workplace crushes are one thing and your crush on Jisung is something all its own. 

You’re pretty sure you’d like him if you met him in a bar, at a bookstore, on the subway; anywhere. 

“I’m beginning to think that he just made up that something was wrong so he’d have a reason to be an asshole,” Jisung says, setting the project down before resting his chin in his hand. “Or my brain and eyes no longer work.”

“Seems like the first is more likely.” You mirror him, propping your head up with your hand. “I know we should finish this tonight but I’m not sure we’re going to be able to.” You stretch your arms over your head. “I’ll come in Sunday to work on it. Maybe some time away will help.”

“You shouldn’t have to come in on the weekend.”

“According to bossman, I shouldn’t be in charge either, but what can you do?” You laugh, though it’s not enough to not sound sad. When your hand comes back down, he covers it with his.

“You’re a good leader.”

You look down at his hand on yours. 

“I–”

“Really. You always listen to everyone’s ideas. You never say any are dumb even when they totally are. You make everyone feel involved and invested. You’re a really good leader.” 

You can’t think of what to say.

“Did I embarrass you?”

You force your gaze from his hand to his face. He’s got that quiet smile, soft. 

“Yeah, but same as you. It’s more me trying to accept a compliment than you saying it.” You force a smile. “Thank you.”

He leans forward a little. “You’re welcome.” His eyes (you swear you’re not making this up) fall to your mouth before darting back up.

“Also, thank you for earlier.”

He cocks his head to the side in question. 

“Sticking up for me. Even though you shouldn’t have.” You barely notice that you’ve leaned closer as well. 

The blush darkens on his cheeks and the tops of his ears. 

“Wanna get a drink?”

You blink a few times. “What?”

He scratches the back of his head, eyes leaving yours. “I mean…now. Dinner and a drink. My treat.”

“Um…sure, but you don’t have to–”

“I want to.” He swallows nervously. “I want to stick up for you, help you out, take you out. And I really want to kiss you, but I feel like kissing you at work is kind of a gray area on professionalism.”

You really can’t think of what to say. 

He lets go of your hand, abruptly getting up. “Unless you’re not interested. Which is fine. Totally acceptable and I won’t ever mention it again–” He stops when you stand as well. 

“Dinner and a drink.” You reach out to straighten his tie. “And a kiss.”

You see his shoulders drop in relief, and those pretty eyes spark with mischief. “Just one?”

Later, when his mouth is on yours, his hands gripping your waist; you lose count of how many kisses. 

You decide a workplace crush turning into a workplace romance isn’t as stupid as you thought.

--

© yoongihan 2023. please do not steal, translate, repost, or whatever. stray kids belong to themselves and all idols used in this piece are just the inspiration for characters and do not in any way reflect the actual humans.

[chickencat8]

oh shit oh fuck, is that-

Good shipping art?? Yes

helps me live

instead of taking prescription medication i just do this instead

[yeahimwiththeband]

-> with the band prologue

sometimes i think love is for other people

warning: 18+ minors DNI due to smut in later chapters. also, people pleasing, anxiety disorder, codependency (just with mc’s mom, thank god), huge amounts of really ugly fabric from the 60s, repression. still not for larries :(

A/N: i write stories about girls with anxiety disorder learning to thrive and become who they are. first story post on tumblr, first attempt writing a book of any kind. thank you so much for reading. i do take requests and love any feedback or input or ideas. this is a love on tour fanfic, harry styles au, slow burn romance. 

word count: .95k

The beginning of her happiness and their love story started with the end of another one, but Izzy didn’t know it at the time. To her, it just felt like a dead end. Watching her now-ex boyfriend’s car speed away, the road in front of her seemed dull and empty: back to her routine of working at the store during the day and living in her laptop at night. 

Izzy couldn’t see what was just around the corner, if only she could push herself to make it there.

She couldn’t believe she was back here again, alone e in the boring suburb where she grew up. She had a cast on her arm and a cardboard box of relationship castoffs at her feet. 

She had never even stayed over, so it wasn’t stuff like her toothbrush and moisturizer; in the box, Roger had given Izzy back everything she had ever given to him, all her carefully chosen gifts. She watched his car disappear down the street and heard her mother calling her from inside. She was 23, living at home, and as the sound of the engine faded away, she thought she heard an escape hatch out of her boring af life closing.

Her first and only boyfriend, done after a month. Even worse? Her mom had set them up. Roger was a childhood friend. And there was another layer of hideousness still, so ugly that Izzy couldn’t even say it aloud, not even in the silence of her own mind. Instead, she and her best friend Meg had come up with a nickname for the unspeakable thing: The Boulder. A fatal flaw that drove everyone away from her, despite Meg’s reassurances that it wasn’t that big of a deal. Izzy felt shame climb her legs like fire, burning up her spine and the back of her neck. The Boulder is why Roger left. She made the mistake of telling him, the mistake of telling the truth. Izzy felt like the least loveable person alive.

How could she go back inside and explain the breakup to her mom? What lie would she whip up this time to keep her happy? Maybe she could say that Roger was moving out of the country. Or that he had been drafted. Izzy wiped her face and pressed the back of her hands to her cheeks, trying to hide all evidence of tears before going back inside. She didn’t want to distress or disappoint anyone.

What was she doing wrong? Whenever a guy liked her, it was never something normal—it was always something totally weird, and always someone she didn’t even really like that much. She wanted a relationship like the ones her friends had, where they went on normal dates and didn’t seem totally consumed with panic and anxiety. Big love. Real love. Not having to ask Roger if she could stay over and being told no, because he had work in the morning. Her life at that moment felt like a long list of things she didn’t have and things she hadn’t done, an empty charade put on for her parents, who she could never seem to please.

She stood frozen on the sidewalk, contemplating her options. She could bring the box inside, tell everyone she was fine, and drown her sorrows in Netflix and A03, like she always did.

Instead, Izzy dialled her best friend Meg. The accident that left her with the cast on her arm and the scar on her stomach had turned her life upside down. All the things she could just barely tolerate before—basically, every single thing in her life—she could no longer smile and lie through.

When Meg picked up, Izzy was too close to crying to speak.

“What’s wrong? Did he… is it over?”

Izzy recounted the breakup: the message, the cold box drop off. “I didn’t even want to go out with him in the first place. It was for my mom, as usual,” Izzy sniffed.

“How are you feeling?” Meg asked. Izzy didn’t have the comfort of hiding from her best friend, because they had known each other since first grade; even when Izzy lied to try to stuff down her own feelings, as she always did, Meg knew what was really going on.

Izzy looked down at the discarded presents in the box. The baseball cap from Roger’s favourite team, which she pretended to love too. The t-shirt from his favourite EDM artist, which she had listened to for hours and hours even though she hated it. All this, and he didn’t love her back.

For the first time, Izzy tried to put words to the pain rooted deep in her chest: “Sometimes I think love is for other people.”

“Oh, Izzy,” Meg replied, nearly crying herself.

Izzy’s sadness filled the silence on both ends of the line. Izzy put the back of her hand up to her face to blot away the tears that had started falling.

 “It is for you,” Meg said. “You can have it, too.”

“Then where is it?” Izzy asked. “Why haven’t I…”

“Roger didn’t even know you,” Meg said, sensing an opportunity to be more honest. “It wasn’t a—I know it’s hard not to take this personally, but honestly, the person he rejected wasn’t you.”

Izzy nodded, surprised by this revelation.

“You never let them see you,” Meg said gently.

Izzy pushed the box to the side, up next to the garbage that would be taken away the next morning. She took a deep breath, feeling unsteady. 

“I have to…” Izzy searched around. 

She looked down at the box of things she had said she loved to keep someone who didn’t even like her. Who she had nothing in common with. She hadn’t even gone after him; she had clung onto him just because he was around. She never went after what she wanted.

“I have to stop faking everything just to keep people,” Izzy continued, uncertain. “I have to do some things I’ve wanted to do.”

“Yes, yes, totally,” said Meg, so excited she was almost shouting. “What do you want to start with?”

That was the beginning of the three secrets.

And Izzy didn’t know it then, but that was the beginning of him: big love, real love, just what she needed. But not quite the way she imagined it.

chapter 1

[linuseer]

Okay here are my grievances with the Loki show:

Loki isn’t the protagonist or focus of his own show–and no this shouldn’t be “a Loki” show, the MCU aka Earth-199999 main Loki is the one played by the Hiddleston actor and the one people actually wanted to see in the first place

The narcissist bullshit–you show-guys better fix that in the second part or I’ll never forgive you, which is a relatively small threat considering I’m a nobody but fuck I swear if that doesn’t get solved I’ll never consume a Marvel product again

The “Mobius gave Loki therapy” bullshit–the show never actually framed the interrogations as “therapy” (thank fuck) but everyone, insider and outsider, seems to think it is?? That’s... not a good thing 

Also I appreciated Loki’s expression in ep6 when Miss Minutes mentioned killing Thanos, but why is that the only instance of something like that we get–Ep1 had promises of finally addressing all the shit Loki went through and the show never delivered. There wasn’t need to have a sit down talk about all of it, but more instances like the one in ep6 would have been gold. I thought ep1 was a setup but instead it was a speed run of... everything. Both a cliffhanger and a brick wall to slam into and just... was left there

The use of 616 stuff seemingly at random–especially God Of Stories Loki’s crown with the broken horn just put on Sylvie with no further explanation. That crown is important, very much so, in 616, just slapping that crown on an OC who doesn’t even want to be Loki feels fucking wrong

The Sylvie + Amora + Mary Sue OC mashup horror–wtf. Just wtf. Also it may seem extremely petty but I fucking hate the fact that she’s blonde. A blonde Loki. Horror material

The whole romance copout–romance in a Loki show? Using romance to show self-love? What kinda amatonormative bullshit trash cliche is that. Had to show self-love through a het romantic relationship between what should be two iterations of the same person, stale and cheap. Also it seems to be 85% of what everyone everywhere is focusing on instead of literally anything else that’s arguably 100% more interesting. Basic and boring af

The outright queerbaiting–nice and all they’ve mentioned bisexuality, for me would have been fine even if they left it at that and a suggestive glance to characters here and there, as said imo fleshed out romance is a waste of storytelling in a Loki plot. But the gender fluid stuff? Leaving it as a printed word in a file, never mentioning it anywhere in the actual show, having other Loki variants show surprise at the idea of a female Loki, that’s... low. Unworthy of all the praise and attention it gets, at least

I’ve seen others say there’s racism, I agree in the only way a white European can agree–aka I see pocs say it’s not the right kind of representation so I listen to them and try to offer as much support as I can. To sum it up, poc characters are brutish and selfish (Hunter B15, Ravonna, “Boastful” Loki–really? Even the nickname) and/or immediately discarded after they’ve served their marginal purpose (Hunter C20)

Who tf hired this Waldron guy and why–the writer’s interviews just?? Seem to show he based his interpretation of Loki on personal headcanons mixed with the Thor: Ragnarok characterization??? A characterization which also is objectively a very personal one of another director for a film that in the Loki show hasn’t even happened???? Sir??????  

“Loki’s character arc is that now he doesn’t want a throne” bullshit

Holy crap.

[smartguyreviewed]

1x7 - A Little Knowledge

Original air date: May 7, 1997

Hello there, friends. How are we holding up during these “unprecedented times?” I am currently holding up by pretty much being high 18/7, not sleeping and obsessing over a show that pretty much nobody talks about because I am that bored.

Really, I do want to thank anyone who takes the time to read this blog and/or drop a like. I started this blog because I enjoyed reading reviews of Lizzie McGuire and Boy Meets World. And then I thought of how not that many black sitcoms are pretty much ever really discussed. I watched Smart Guy so much when I was a kid but didn’t realize how important it was to even be watching it because we had so many other black television shows during my childhood, the complete opposite of how it is now. I always thought about even making a YouTube channel reviewing that black ass nostalgia that I love so much, but since I’m in the ugly phase of growing my starter locs, I figured I’d blog for now. 

Alright! There’s my intro. I really did mean it, but I had no idea how else to segue into the opening for this episode. By the way, if anyone is a super meticulous asshole and thinks the numbering of the episodes is off, I was honestly confused because Disney omitted a whole ass episode of the show, so I wouldn’t be surprised if the numbering of the episodes is different here but nowhere else on the web. The first season is already less than 10 episodes, so whatever.

Okay, so we open to Floyd about to do his books but he needs the little precocious calculator to help him out. This triggers me because I still have not done my taxes even though the deadline was extended. Luckily, it doesn’t appear that the Hendersons have any timely bills due but they are broke. After TJ adds up all the numbers, Floyd sees he is definitely not in the black. 

Because the episode is about money, naturally, both of Floyd’s grown children need pricey things all of a sudden. Yvette comes down and asks for a coat to replace this...thing that she’s wearing because it’s clearly ill-fitting. Floyd says he can buy her a new coat, as long as she’s not particular as to which winter she gets it in.

Up next is our Marcus, asking for something totally egregious. At least Yvette was asking for weather appropriate clothing. Marcus is asking Floyd for a $1500 bike. And now I’m confused. Why the hell would Marcus of all people need a bike? If he’s really trying his damndest to get the girls, I thought the band alone served that purpose. Regardless, Marcus needs it and he’s a teenager so the world is going to end tomorrow if he doesn’t get this deathcycle of his. He even tries to manipulate his dad by showing him a photo of Floyd on his bike. I actually think it’s cute how Floyd lights up at the sight of younger him. Maybe he met his deceased wife during these years? 

Floyd breaks out of memory lane and reminds Marcus that he, a human parent, wants the finer things also, including the chance to see his old friends at his high school reunion but that doesn’t seem to have a snowball’s chance in hell of happening. Yeah, because Floyd has to put food on the table for a woman and three guys (yes, I’m including Mo and guys eat a lot and I don’t wanna hear shit about how girls eat a lot too because guys just eat more and that’s a fact) and school all of his children. No room for the finer things.

He then says that Yvette and Marcus can buy what they want but simply have to get jobs. Marcus balks at the idea and says he wouldn’t want work to interrupt his studies. Yvette and TJ have a nice little kii over this since hahaha “Marcus is dumb,” hahaha.

We cut to TJ in his room attempting to strategize ways for the Henderson clan to save money while watching a bootleg version of Jeopardy!. Marcus comes in on the phone with Craig, the guy selling the bike, and convinces him to not sell it, even though Marcus only has 4.2% of the funds. Yvette barges in and is pissed at her annoying little brothers for not unlocking her door when they’re done with the bathroom. See, they share a bathroom in this episode. In another episode, Yvette gets her own bathroom built...somewhere because she’s tired of sharing with them. This bathroom is never mentioned again. In another episode, Marcus temporarily moves to the attic. I just wonder exactly how the Henderson house is built because it seems like there’s so much space yet so little space? 

The boys aren’t listening to Yvette however, because she stank. She credits this funk to the job she just got at the Cluck Bucket, “yanking the gushy stuff out of chickens,” as Marcus eloquently puts it. She brags, saying she makes $100 a week, which is obviously $1000 a week in 90s money. 

After TJ proposes that Yvette cut Marcus’s hair, Marcus realizes TJ is attempting to optimize their family’s finances. TJ really is doing a lot for a 10 year old here. Normally, he’s being extremely rude to them, but in this episode, he’s trying to use his intelligence to fix a problem that he has no business worrying about. Clearly, this intelligence is a gift and a curse. I’m about to be 29 and I worry all the time about things I can’t even control along with the things I can. Imagine being 10, gifted AF and stressing only about adult things you can’t control.

Marcus actually delivers good advice this episode, most likely unbeknownst to him. He commands TJ to turn off his brain and stop worrying because this is something he can’t fix. And Marcus is right. A 10 year old has zero reasons to be trying to balance the family checkbook. It would have been better if he threw a Gameboy at him and told him that’s his homework instead.

But this is TJ and he is the determinator AKA hard-headed. Bootleg Jeopardy! is about to end but the host announces a junior version of the show. TJ checks all the boxes. Youngster? Check. Living in the D.C. area? Check. In desperate need of $25k? Double check!

TJ and Marcus are back home and go over how they’re going to break the news to Floyd since obviously he wouldn’t have given TJ permission to audition if they asked. Floyd seems pissed at first when they tell him but Marcus makes sure to place emphasis on how TJ kicked ass. Floyd is proud now, even though a few moments ago, he was about to go full Papa Bear.

The next day, Piedmont is buzzing about TJ’s television debut but he’s confused because he only told his fam. We then cut to Marcus blabbing to some girl about how he can get her a seat next to him so she can give him a handjob on the sly. (Of course, we don’t even see said girl at the show.) TJ tells Marcus he didn’t want everyone to know because, understandably, now there’s more pressure on him. Marcus responds to this by putting even more pressure on him, telling Craig that TJ is going to win him the bike. Then he puts a damn anvil on it by telling Craig to raise the price to $1700 and he’ll just take the bike now. This will end well.

TJ, under immense pressure because the show is filming in 6 hours at this point (film/TV people, if you’re reading, feel free to say if this is even normal for it to move this quickly especially for an underage guest?), is up late at night studying his ass off and high off legal coke. He’s awoken Marcus who is wondering why on earth TJ would be up this early studying for a quiz television show that has a large monetary prize and they’re broke. He wants TJ to get some sleep by he’s in the zone because he had 20 cups of coffee. After a drug fueled rant, he just passes out. 

6 hours later and TJ is still high. Floyd chalks it up to nerves before TJ starts sprinting around the set. Marcus shows up, announcing he just chained up his new bike to a dumpster. This will end well. He checks in on TJ who is still coked up and not coming down anytime soon. His dad calls him over to meet the other contestants which include Dylan Roof and Yung Sharpay.

After the kids are ushered onto set, Floyd goes to the other hoity toity parents, bragging about their kids’ accomplishments. He dismisses them and says TJ actually has a life. Floyd, you dick! Afterwards, the show begins. The host is opening and says he believes that children are our future. Floyd and Marcus are backstage and in true black parent fashion, once TJ is announced, they lose their shit!

The game is now underway and Yung Sharpay and TJ are caught up. Dylan Roof is pretty much just there because he’s so far behind that it doesn’t even matter. Amy loudly tells TJ that he has a broken leg and they’re loading the shotgun because she just caught up to him. Of course, nobody heard this even though she was loud as hell. Also, racial implications much?

Yvette comes late in her work uniform and is hurriedly trying to tell Marcus a bit of info he’ll want to act fast on, but naturally, he shushes her to listen to the game that TJ is about to possibly lose. Yvette is also a petty asshole, so she doesn’t even try to tell him again. They cut to break and Yvette announces then that Marcus’s bike is gone. Turns out, locking it to a dumpster isn’t the best idea because some guy in a garbage truck stole it dragged the dumpster away. Marcus is pissed and lets slip that he paid $1700 for it which gets him in trouble because he just told Floyd that he was taking it on a test drive. Then the rest of the truth spews out. Marcus says he wanted something from the money TJ was going to win and oh mama is Floyd pissed because he naturally expects the worst from Marcus always and thinks he forced TJ to be in the competition which wasn’t even the case. Floyd tells Marcus he’s going to talk to TJ and warns him to “brace himself” for when he gets back. Yvette gleefully says she’s going to get chalk for his body outline. What did Marcus do to everyone to make them hate him so much? TJ does way shittier things than him and he’s still held in high regard. Hmm.

Floyd comes over to TJ to check in and lets him know that he’s aware of what’s going on. TJ, who has only consumed coffee and chocolate for the past few hours, is now dizzy. Floyd has to remind TJ that he has plenty of time to worry about rent and bills and student loans and credit card debt and finding a therapist and the pressure to have it “together” by the time you’re 30 which is crazy unrealistic. Good lesson and one of the few times I don’t wanna strangle TJ. Understandably, with the pressure off, TJ wants to dipset. The host, while seeing TJ and Floyd leaving, says they signed a contract so somebody needs to fill in for TJ. Cut to one of the funniest scenes in the show, hands down.

The question is how much did Thomas Jefferson, another TJ, pay for the Louisiana Purchase? This is word for word what Marcus-as-TJ says.

“Well uh, let’s see. In DC, the most you can take out of the ATM is $300 and you would wanna hold back a $20 in case something comes up, so I’m gonna say $280, Hugh.”

Yvette’s reaction says it all.

In the end, we see Yvette at the Cluck Bucket, putting on her functional gray pea coat that she probably got from Contempo Casuals or something. Marcus is the janitor now because he has to work off his debt to Craig and because remember, Marcus is a dark-skinned buffoon and couldn’t get the same job as Yvette for some reason. Whatever. I wonder what Yung Sharpay did with her prize money.

Stuff I Noticed:

- Yvette’s jacket. What is this?

- Marcus’s face for Lil’ Dylan and Yung Sharpay versus TJ. I love black families.

White lady on the left does not approve.

- No Mo this episode! :(

[yourtypicalboredbitch]

I have the feeling that mcu!Clint Barton is only married because of a bet with natasha.

now, hear me out. I'm not imagining that angsty stuff where he pretends to love her while he doesn't

it all starts like this:

natasha: omg clint you're annoying me rn, just get a life

clint: well I could get one but annoying you is way funnier

natasha: seriously? you live in the vents

clint: no, I bet you I could get one

natasha: oh yeah? what do I get if you don't? you know what? I want you to pretend that you lost your hearing aids for the next month and when people know, you tell me everything you heard

clint: and if I win, uuuuh I want my favorite sweater back and a lot of coffee... wait did you just make this a bet?!

natasha is already on her way to training, while clint is worrying about the "new life" he has to start now. and he absolutely has to do it, he wouldn't back down in front of natasha

so in the small town they've been to once for a mission, he starts trying to sell himself, shouting how a relationship would only be temporary, that he'd be a great boyfriend and that whoever would accept shouldn't be afraid or allergic to dogs, since he owns one and that they have to be a little chaotic

laura just wanted to go shopping and suddenly there was an idiot with hearing aids and a whole coffee pot in his hands shouting how he couldn't lose this bet

and she thought she was chaotic

but she hears him out because she's bored and he seems like a funny guy and she recognized him by now, he's an avenger

so she goes up to him and asks what she gets for being his temporary girlfriend

"well, uh, shit I didn't think about that... uh a nice boyfriend? or, uh, idk dresses?"

yup, he's an idiot.

"I want a nice house in this town, maybe a ranch or something. my landlord is driving me crazy"

at first clint wanted to decline because he was broke af but after a second his very good friend tony stark came his mind. if he told him about the bet, he'd be on natasha's side and probably wouldn't help him but if he thought he was genuine... hmm.

"okay, sure!"

so it was decided

and while they spent time together and he actually consumed other things than only black coffee, they slowly began to fall in love, they both had their bad habits and they loved each other for it

clint introduced laura to everyone and of course all of them were in hysterics since nobody thought clint would ever get a girlfriend

well, except natasha

natasha wasn't surprised that he found someone but that they seemed to be so in love

this laura was a good actress

this continued for a month

and then clint got his sweaters back and a lot of coffee, he could even get natasha to buy dog treats for lucky

but he didn't want things with laura to end, she was amazing company and they had a lot of things in common

so when it was time to go, he didn't

instead he did something very spontaneous

he proposed

laura thought about it for 2 days, it was too good to be true

but in the end she said yes

and, well, the kids weren't planned but in the end it happened and they loved each other

and that was all that mattered

so in the end, clint thanked natasha for it

[timeisacephalopod]

4, 6, 9, 10, 12: Rhodey and Bucky, 15, 16, 21, 23, 27, 29, 30, 32, 35, 37, 43, 46, 50, 54: Tony

You know that meme where the white woman is looking at the math overlaying the picture in confusion? That was me when I got this ask because instead of reading the fucking questions on the ask meme I put up I decided ‘Rhodey and Bucky’ were some other thing? Long story short I’m a moron lmao.

4- Favorite actress

Tbh I don’t pay much attention to the actresses and thus I almost missed out of saying Tessa Thompson like some kind of savage. I appreciate how hard she worked to try and make Valkyrie bisexual and also her character was basically the only thing I liked about Thor: Ragnarok (controversial opinion, I know).

6- Favorite quote

“Trust my rage” from Thor The Dark World. This line is so visceral and poetic. Like shit son, the rest of the movie was eh, but that line? Fucking amazing, and Hiddleston’s delivery of it is top tier bois.

9- BROTP

Pepper and Tony. I’ve never seen the romance between them, and in my opinion it was there because it seems movies are fucking incapable of not having a romance subplot (no hate to pepperony shippers either, everyone likes what they like and the entire point of fic is to circumvent canon anyways). But as a friendship pairing these two are excellent- they’re a great team, they understand each other on a fundamental level, and their friendship dynamic is interesting. Also, to me, I think their relationship is more compelling without the romance.

10- How did I discovered Marvel?

I’ve mentioned this in other asks but I had a friend make me watch Avengers and I didn’t like it lmao. I only gave it another show two years later and started from the beginning with CA:TFA and then I got into it. I’m not sure what changed or why I took to it later, especially when I found the later half of TFA to be kind of boring (I love Skinny!Steve ok) but it happened and when WS came out I saw it in theaters. From then I was hooked.

12- Make me choose between two characters: Rhodey and Bucky

Damn, I’d rather not have to choose, you suck! But, for the sake of the ask, Rhodey. As a character he’s better constructed, has his own story and motivation outside Tony, he’s funny, and while he has his moments (that I mostly blame on shit writing) he’s a great friend. I honestly wish that we could get a whole movie about him doing things but I did hear some rumors not long ago about Marvel looking into making Iron Man 4 an Ironheart movie and the only thing that would make that better is if Rhodey were her mentor (I literally wrote a story about this once).

Anyways, although I write Bucky a lot more than I do Rhodey I do prefer his character in a more fundamental way simply because he’s more fleshed out. Plus I love male friendships that are actually good and James Rhodey Rhodes is the God Tier of friends. The man spent 3 fucking months combing the desert for his disaster friend and that’s some damn dedication. Especially when you know people must have gotten real damn annoyed with him using resources and shit. But that action alone tells you everything you need to know about him and none of it is bad. I love Rhodey, seriously.

15- Top 5 ships

Tony/T’Challa

Tony/ Bucky

Tony/ Stephen

Tony/Rhodey

And, because I feel compelled to put a ship that doesn’t have Tony in it Steve/Howard

Honorable Mentions: Tony/ Peter Q

16- Top 5 villains

THANOS

Erik Killmonger

Loki

Justin Hammer (he’s just so absurd)

Ghost (from Ant Man and The Wasp)

Seriously, this was hard because Marvel’s villains are shit. They’re all the same one dimensional ‘they’re evil’ type characters.

21- Dream crossover

Basically any urban fantasy world I loved in my teens and the MCU. I’ve written a Vampire Academy/ MCU crossover but I’d love to write a House of Night crossover (I hate the characters in HoN, but love the world ok don’t judge), and a Shadowhunters crossover. I’ve seen some cool stuff with Teen Wolf being crossed over too though.

23- Most layered character

Tony fucking easily. His arcs are always the most compelling (or close to it), he’s had the most character development, and his trauma plays out so beautifully on screen. I’d argue Steve is a close second post WS, but the MCU will never let his character play out the development he’s gotten because they’ll never let Steve be less than perfect, which pisses me off. Otherwise his transition from a solider who wants to do right by his country to a cynical man who doesn’t know how to process the new world he’s been tossed into or how to handle a situation in which the morally correct solution isn’t abundantly obvious would be a compelling watch. But its been consistently proven that Steve will never get a real realization of his new characterization because ~~perfection~~.

27- Favorite moment

Shiiiit. That’s a lot of material and because I have a bad memory I’m going to go with ‘don’t call us plucky, we don’t know what it means’ because that was hilarious lmao.

29- Saddest moment

Shit boi, probs a toss up between Peter P’s death and Bucky’s. Peter’s is obvious but Bucky fucking dusting in front of the dude who spent so long trying to find him again in an effort to feel, even if its just for a moment, like he’s home again? Sad af. I felt awful for Steve there.

30- Most beautiful scene

Pretty much all of Black Panther is a visual treat, but I’m especially fond of T’Challa in the dream world with his father. That scene was so beautiful, and all the colors? Amazing. Only Guardians of the Galaxy even compares visually and even then Wakanda’s beauty has something else to offer that space doesn’t.

32- Actor/Actress I’d like to be cast by Marvel

As mentioned above I pay literally zero attention to actors- its a personal choice not to spend time being a voyeur into other people’s lives and treat them like commodities to consume because I loath celebrity culture (and this isn’t a slam to anyone who enjoys it, its more a slam to people who over engage in it- ie people who care enough to send death threats or paps basically). Anyways that’s an opinion you didn’t ask for, but because of that personal opinion I have no real cast choice lmao.

35- Most boring plotline?

I love Thor but all his movies. The first movie had good personal growth but eh. The second was an ok movie but forgettable (aside from my fav line from Loki in it), and unpopular opinion I hated Thor Ragarok. I mean it was funny. That’s all the good I have to say about it really. Though I have no idea why every comedy writers room is not leaping at a chance to get Taikia on their staff because the man is a comedic genius and that’s honestly being impolite to his comedy skill. Still, as much as I like Thor I didn’t really love any of his movies and all his villains were so fucking boring, even Loki wasn’t that interesting till Avengers. Poor Thor, MCU did him dirty :(

37- Most well done character death

Peter P. I give this to him over Bucky because apparently most of that scene was improv? I cried over my spider son ok. There’s someone who was in that theater with me who heard me sob out ‘my spider son’ and went home to tell people about it. That shit was heartbreaking. Second runner up goes to T’Challa but I didn’t think it was well done, I just thought it was sad as shit for Okoye and I love her so it was upsetting to see her lose her king :(

43- Characters I wish they’ve met

I don’t understand the question :( I think it’s supposed to be ‘characters you wish would met’ but all my wishes were granted in IW. Tony and Stephen met and so did Tony and Quill. I shipped Tony with both characters before they’d interacted on screen so it was nice to see :) Rhodey and Quill would be a fucking hoot together though, throw in Okoye and Valkyrie and you’ve got a bunch of drunk overpowered people telling war stories or, in Quill’s case, stories about that time he stole some shit.

46- What characters outside of the Mcu I’d like to see in a Marvel movie?

Ironheart, but I heard rumors they might do a movie with her. I think it’d be fun to have Riri in screen, especially since Peter is around her age. I’d also love to see a Young Avengers movie or a Kamala Khan/ Ms. Marvel movie though apparently there’s rumors of that too.

50- Characters that deserved better

Tony, Bucky, and Steve but all for different reasons. Steve deserves his fall from grace and not because I think he should suffer, but because keeping him on his pedestal means he’ll never be able to fully process his trauma and move on. Allow him to fall, allow him to know he isn’t perfect, then allow him to know that that’s ok, he doesn’t need to be, he just needs to do the best he can and then allow him a proper chance to move on.

Bucky because he deserves to be a character outside of Steve and, to a much smaller extent, Tony. Let the man have a movie about self actualization after trauma, let him figure out he isn’t Steve Roger’s best friend anymore (and that Steve isn’t really Steve anymore) and that that’s ok, they can both accept themselves as they exist now and still be friends. Let him develop hobbies outside of Steve, have him bond with Rhodey, he needs a good friend. Shit, let him bond with Sam too. Give me a buddy movie where Sam lowkey therapies Bucky into being a fuckin person again and Bucky finds some way to repay him. He can go beat up Scott for that time he kicked Sam’s ass lol.

And Tony because the MCU makes fuckin everything his fault, even stuff that only somewhat involves him. They drive him to an absolute breaking point and then have the characters get pissed that he broke? The only one that I found acceptable was Pepper and that’s mostly because I understand why she’d be freaked out both by Tony’s obsessive behavior and by nearly being eaten by one of his suits. She had her own shit she was dealing with post Mandarin so her I understand. Everyone else though? Mostly makes no sense. Why are you surprised that a person snaps when they’re pushed to the limit? That’s how people work lmao but that’s also because the writers make an active, and completely senseless, choice to have the characters react like Tony’s mental health problems are a choice he made and now he has to suffer because he has PTSD or some shit. Idk, but AoU was the worst for it, and, to a lesser extend IM3 but I refuse to believe Rhodey would really tell Tony to get over himself after a panic attack- the man is emotionally intelligent ok, IM3 did Rhodey dirty.

54- 5 things I love most about: Tony

Tony’s sheer level of wonder at the world around him- the look on his face in IM2 when he rediscovers that element perfectly encapsulates how he feels about learning and moving forward. (Flipside is that sometimes he has trouble staying in the present and that causes problems).

The way he tries no matter how badly he fails. Bih, if my random tests on a rock nearly ended the world I’d out and out throw myself off a cliff. Instead he accepts his part in it (and more) and chooses to try and make the best of it. He’s done that from the moment he got snatched by terrorists in Afghanistan. That in itself is basically a superpower.

His humor. I, too, hide my emotional distress under jokes so I can relate to being a lil bit of an asshole to hide how I feel. (Flipside: people don’t think he takes stuff seriously- hence Steve in the Avengers).

His mental health problems. Ok this one is weird, but I can appreciate that someone drew up a hero that isn’t based in perfection, but who tries to get there anyways. But the dude has problems, a lot of problems, and they aren’t always pretty. But they are complicated and it is compelling to watch.

The way he builds relationships. Its unconventional- Rhodey is probably the only person he’s super close to that he met in a normal way. Happy and Pepper were both people that worked for him and instead of just being their boss he took the time to learn about them and get to know them on a personal level. Obviously he ended up engaged to Pepper, but a guy who knows what his driver’s favorite show is and why he likes it is a good dude. He’d be nice to wait staff in restaurants.

[grape-soda-drinking-hufflepuffs]

Friends as their respective houses:

Slytherin: Quiet but irritated with everyone except best friend, by whom they somehow aren’t annoyed even though they constantly talk and sing, smart but doesn’t gloat, mental but isn’t secretive about it, best friends with Hufflepuff, minimalistic and obsessed with Slytherin common room’s aesthetic, awesome red hair, never finishes a show they’ve started watching with best friend, instead gets bored halfway through and refuses to continue, social life consists of hanging out with best friend and watching Netflix alone, likes to think they have good music taste but actually doesn’t have much of any preference and freely admits it, loves dogs and prefers not to be in the presence of human babies, looks at chicken coop designs and humane society website in their free time, could be straight or bisexual, nobody knows

Ravenclaw: Smart about life and has common sense but not necessarily book-smart, huge Got7 and Arashi fan, hates the cold and complains when it’s like 65°f, thinks you’re a shut-in if you don’t hang out with someone at least 4 times a week, gets you hooked on shows that you can’t really watch unless it’s at their house, relatively passive-aggressive when pissed, awesome hair and gorgeous smile, loves learning new languages, obsessed with Japanese fashion but wears very little of it, loves babysitting, makes really good quesadillas, laughs with Hufflepuff about really dumb stuff while everyone else looks confused and just a little exasperated, straight, best friends with the third Slytherin in the group, holds grudges like they ought to have their own movie, basically lives off cheese

Gryffindor: Outgoing, doesn’t take shit but isn’t rude about it, likes to think they’re always right but admits after a while when they’re wrong, likes dragons, reads a little bit of everything, likes the idea of running but likes sleep more, doesn’t like pop but somehow knows all the songs on the local pop station, chocolate milk addict, eats the most burgers you’ve ever seen anyone consume, favorite color is turquoise, hoodies give them life, likes learning about new cultures, doesn’t really care that much about people’s feelings but doesn’t do anything to intentionally upset them, only drinks water and sobe, thinks peacocks are the coolest animal ever, tone deaf but sings with Hufflepuff at the top of their lungs in Hufflepuff’s yellow vw beetle, very straight

Hufflepuff: Sensitive, extremely compassionate, consumes enough coffee to give a barista a heart attack, spams friends with memes, carries a book around everywhere, is mental, adores yellow, will punch someone in the throat if they’ve messed with their friends, pescatarian because they lack the conviction to give up sushi, slaps friends’ butts all the time, horticulturist, hands and feet constantly cold, likes the idea of being healthy and exercising but loves nutella more, both best friends are in Slytherin, obsessed with indie rock and alternative music, dresses like misty day from American Horror Story, feminist and liberal af, favorite food is lasagna, is at their best in summer, bisexual/heteroflexible, book-smart but constantly spaced out and doesn’t have a lot of common sense, folds paper cranes all the time, super musical and artsy, cat person, talks about HP/fbawtft all the time, forgives within a day

[tenitchyfingers]

You can think someone’s tastes in fiction are disgusting. You can hate those fictional things. It’s okay. I hate crime tv shows, I hate shows for teenagers, I hate YA books, I hate coffeeshop aus and all that stuff because in my opinion it’s boring as hell. And I’m allowed to think that. I’m allowed to have tastes and you’re allowed to have tastes too. Hating or just not caring for something is fine.

What’s not fine is translate your opinion of the medium on real people and accuse them of real crimes, especially if you have no proof that they actually committed any of those crimes.

You can think stuff with age difference is gross, that’s fine. Each to their own. But first off, media on its own has literally no impact on people’s behavior, otherwise every NBC Hannibal fan would be out there eating people. And if you’re gonna come at me with the “romanticizing” and “normalizing” argument, Hannibal made murder and cannibalism and psychological manipulation look cool and glam af but again, that did not result in people killing women and mounting them on deer horns, or killing a hundred or so people and stitching them together to form the figure of an open eye. And also, fan fiction and fanart and singular pieces of media don’t normalize anything. To normalize something, that thing needs to be repeated over and over and come from every facet of society, and society already thinks sexual kinks and crimes are shameful so don’t worry, nobody is gonna go and eat cum-filled peaches because they saw Call Me By Your Name. That shit is still gross by pretty much everyone’s standard. A drawing or a movie can’t change an entire society’s mindset without society already accepting a behavior, implicitly or explicitly.

Also, there’s the fact that sexual crimes have been steadily declining in the last decades, and what else happened in this context? The distribution of porn blew up, in the sense that while before it was a bit tricky to actually get to watch porn, now it’s easier than ever to get it and consume it. But sexual crimes declined. How’s that? Isn’t it at all possible that fiction and our relationship with it is a lot more complex than “I saw this thing on tv so now I’m going to emulate it even though I’ve never thought about it before”? Do you all really think pedophilia and rape would go away from all our societies if we got rid of shotacon and porn?

Instead, isn’t it more reasonable to think that if someone rapes a woman it’s because they are a rapist regardless of what they watch on tv, and if someone rapes a child they are a child rapist regardless of what they read or watch or see? If you see someone throwing themselves off a cliff on tv, do you go outside and do it too?

Do you get what’s my problem with the complete lack of logic with antis?

And one last thing: there’s the argument that a child might get groomed with shotacon art, that’s one argument you guys use often. And okay, I’ll bite before you throw the bait: 1. Literally anything can be used as grooming material, that’s why your mom told you not to accept candy from strangers, or at least that’s one of the way reasons why; 2. No child molester would walk up to a child and show them porn, because that would understandably freak them out and child molesters don’t want that, they want children’s trust; 3. So before banning people’s thoughts and tastes, wouldn’t it be better to ban candy, pets, hair products, money, hamburger, comics of all sorts, videogames, etc? Or maybe it would be more reasonable and simple to tell kids’ moms and dads to supervise what their kids do online. Because that’s the thing: the internet is not anyone’s babysitter. You can’t park a child in front of a computer and expect complete strangers to take care of them. Doing so is like dropping a kid in the middle of a trafficked gigantic square, without indications and without clues as to why they’re there, and then leave. It’s exactly the same thing. So in that situation nothing might happen, and the kid might encounter good people and policemen willing to help. But completely different things might happen, and whose fault is it? The person drawing sketches on a bench, minding their own business, or the parents’, for leaving a child in an open public place without any guidance and supervision? Are we really expecting strangers to act like kids’ mommies because nowadays’ parents can’t be bothered to actually parent? It’s not my problem if a child sees porn (especially if it has warnings and disclaimers). It’s their parents’ problem. I’m not a mom and I don’t want to be. I’m here to fan girl about stories that are not real, I’m here to talk to people like me, I absolutely do not give a damn if children hear what I say or read what I write or see what I do. Why are we putting these responsibilities on strangers, and not on parents who have full legal responsibility of protecting their children?

“Aging up doesn’t work, they’re not over 18 just because you say they are!!!” that is, in fact, exactly how fiction works. they are things because we say they are that thing. you can just make it up. look, they work at a coffee shop and one of them’s a cat now. isn’t fiction incredible