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I think I just found the only reasonable exchange involving two people with opposing views on porn to ever exist on this website

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honestly my mother was a huge champ about her eight-year-old asking to be bought an unabridged edition of the Odyssey for a birthday present, and then she was an equally huge champ about reading her eight-year-old the unabridged Odyssey as a bedtime story and pausing every four lines to define something for me, and let me just say that I have fucking TREASURED the opportunity to reverse that old tradition by more or less forcing her to sit on my couch and listen to Epic and pause it every four lines for my dissertation

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I've been thinking about a Terry Pratchett quote, one that went something like, it's better to, something something, than curse the darkness.

Searching for it online brought up "It's better to light a candle than curse the darkness," from Men at Arms. Yeah, I thought. That must have been it. But why do I remember something about a flamethrower? And why does that quote sound so... Tidy? Sweet? Too nice for a Pratchett novel?

It took me a while to find the time to dig through my copy of the book. But here you are:

'Might as well have a bloody king and have done with it!'

The rest of the Night Watch stood looking at their feet in mute embarrassment. Then Carrot said, 'It's better to light a candle than curse the darkness, Captain. That's what they say.'

Okay. That's it all right. But then it continues, on the top of the next page:

'What?' Vimes's sudden rage was like a thunderclap. 'Who says that? When has that ever been true? It's never been true! It's the kind of thing people without power say to make it all seem less bloody awful, but it's just words, it never makes any difference–'

Well. That's Pratchett, all right.

And because it's all about timing, the actual punchline, as it were, only comes thirty or so pages later:

Nobby kept looking back longingly to the fire machine.

Sometimes it's better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness.

... Seems apt, today.

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ai does not belong in creative spaces. period.

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'ao3 needs a like and dislike button'

what you need, my algorithm-rotten minded friend, is a grip

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every time I do a web search, right at the top I have AI info dumping on me

just give me the top result please

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they call me an undercover agent. the way i’m. under the covers :) cozy in bed :)

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Keep your messaging simple:

“Trump fired everyone in charge of airplane safety, and a week later planes started crashing into each other.”

That’s it. That’s the messaging. Don’t get bogged down disputing Trump’s false claims. Just blame him, in short and repeatable sentences.

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I'm not referring to you when I mention people overreacting. I understand that you were curious about the circumstances regarding the DC incident. Unfortunately it's people (mainly on Reddit and Instagram) that have made assumptions about everyone and taught me that you cannot risk treating the DC part separately, better come prepared with everything. I'm talking people rejoicing when OM revealed she had cancer and publicly insulted the children. You just can never be too cautious with that level of vitriol...

Hello, in answer to you wanting to know more about the chappelle/mulaney issue and the relation to JM's addiction:

I'll try not to be too long (I failed) because I think it's ridiculous how much overreaction and lack of nuance/grace there is around JM. I'll tackle the whole timeline from before the intervention and also regarding the divorce and kid(s), because I think people wouldn't have been half as crazy if that hadn't also happened and it needs to be addressed.

So leading up to December 2020: AMT removed the mulaney name and his pics from her social media months before. His interviews started hinting that he was living on his own, and that he wasn't doing well (he started talking of death and his own funeral). It'll come out that both he and she were dealing with their own mental struggles. December 2020, she was not at his intervention. He stays in rehab for two months, so until mid-late February. He went to live in jimmy Kimmel's guest house. Olivia munn, who'd openly shown interest for him for years, happens to be near for work. they hook up, make a baby that is born late November. the divorce happens, and AMT seems surprised ("heartbroken"), she most likely thought it'd take longer or that he'd go back to her. JM and OM aren't dating, but decide to coparent: John was happy about the baby and absolutely wanted to be involved. they start dating a few months later. the official public news come quickly, and seem rushed, when in truth all these things hint at years of difficulties.

Bottom line: JM had been in and out of rehab and was freshly recovering when DC happened.

On the kid(s) and JM's and OM's relationship: people conveniently forget that JM said "I don't know NEVER, people CHANGE" regarding having children. When faced with an unplanned baby, he was happy and wanted to coparent. He later dated and married the baby's mother and they had another planned kid. Between the two kids OM battled breast cancer, had an hysterectomy and thus they got help from a surrogate, so yeah the second baby was very much planned and he very much likes having and caring for his kids. Meanwhile AMT said she froze her eggs due to society's pressure and wrote in her memoir that she did not want kids.

Bottom line: people freaked out because they forgot someone can change their mind about kids after getting sober and separated and stepping up when the baby comes anyway, they ignore all of the opinions of the ex they want to champion, and JM was touring with his kid and facing intense backlash because of this when DC happened.

Finally, on to the Dave Chappelle incident: freshly recovering addict, going through a divorce, new dad, on the road, putting together a new hour of material. He already had not one but two openers. The thing is that often, comedians drop in and add themselves as openers. I don't know how much agency the actual headliner has over this, if the venue has more say, if in the case they're both contracted with a same agency matters (like netflix). But considering the historical delicate moment for JM, and the fact DC is considered one of the best comedians, it must've been a tricky situation IF JM was even aware of the drama around DC. There is also to consider that the problematic jokes were, according to accounts from people in the audience, only a few of the entire set, and met with awkwardness. People cheered at the end for the other normal jokes. In those days DC had also been physically attacked (unrelated to transphobia), and JM offered sympathy for that. If he'd turned DC away, he probably would have suffered repercussions in the industry especially while being shaky after rehab. He's well respected by peers, but DC is still more famous and with more decades of brilliant work and they share a big network. JM couldn't afford the consequences of snubbing DC back then and not even now, actually.

All in all, 1: he didn't invite him, 2: he couldn't turn him away, 3: it's not his fault he couldn't "warn" the audience and he had no control over what DC would say.

JM has never ever talked badly about the queer community. On the contrary, he has openly expressed support through his jokes (concrete example: joined jokes in defense of trans kids with Nick Kroll at 2017 independent spirit awards monologue), and worked alongside queer creatives (concrete example: had Mae Martin on Everybody's in LA), openly stated he disapproves of punching down on people already suffering (can't find the interview sorry) and overall never made a fuss about the queer community or cancel culture. The only actual mention of "canceling" was in Baby J, regarding his addiction, and in the context that he can and has done way worse to himself: "What, you want to cancel JM? I'll KILL him. I almost did."

He did not "betray the queer fans that made him famous": for starters, he got famous because he's got the chops and the talent and did the open mic work and has a very particular and effective approach to comedy, I'm begging people to stop saying that because it's ridiculous and gets you made fun of. Since rehab and DC he's got even more famous. Got a few Emmys, hosted the Governor Awards, presented at the Oscars, turned down hosting them this year because he's too busy, Netflix gave him several blank checks. SNL has been celebrating the 50th season, and JM not only has hosted for the sixth time, but was part of the Feb 16th anniversary special during the opening monologue with Steve Martin and Martin Short, and managed to be given ten minutes to do one of his recurring musical sketches. He dressed Adam Driver as a hot dog and y'all are missing out.

In conclusion: JM is not who you should be mad about. He's not DC that has some weird senile feud with trans people even his fans are sick of, and he's certainly no JKR. JM has spoken and acted in support of the queer community more than once, yet it seems this one involuntary incident holds more weight in the indignation machine of the internet.

My sources: their social media, their subreddits where different people's accounts coincide/are very similar, talk show and written interviews (most notably this one, sorry it's behind paywall, I'd read it as my one free article of the month), AMT's memoir, JM's specials with a grain of salt.

It's a pity that Tumblr still freaks out about JM. Everybody's in LA is exactly the kind of whacky surreal entertainment it would love and Baby J is extremely quotable. You should all go watch the Hot Ones interview too.

This is... a lot of commentary when I only really wanted to know about the timeline.

Like. I get it, I am also like this about blorbos, I will admit I would have likely done something similar if someone asked a question about like... Satine from Star Wars? but I actually did not want to learn more about the divorce or Munn or the kids. I very much didn't want to know about all that.

Some of the other context for the Dave Chappelle question, sure, I get why the 'Mulaney was already on thin ice, Chappelle may have just shown up without warning, rejecting him may not have been an option' is relevant, but like... this is a dissertation on tumblr's hate for Mulaney.

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Ive never really met anyone that thought of ribs as interesting… that’s such a shame. Ribs and the things they do are fascinating…. I think about them everyday.

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I have stated why I think it's necessary to address all of the things together. I will elaborate because you keep ignoring it: people keep overreacting and it drags things out. The drama around DC/JM is rooted in the misinformation and prejudice from the drama around divorce and kids and it always leads to more fuss than necessary, I have had convoluted and very upsetting convos because of this and learned to lay out all the known facts to avoid having to go back and forth with people who insist on using the "evidence" from the addiction onward as proof that he "betrayed" the queer community and base attacks on JM's and my own character. People WILL and HAVE dragged in all kinds of details from the other things to use as gotchas so I have learned it is needed to lay out all of it and be done. It is done to protect my own peace of mind not to "defend a blorbo". I have also now learned this disclaimer is needed too. Maybe now it is clear enough.

It is upsetting as a queer person to see the community mad about one guy that really didn't do anything and is actually one of the few that has zero qualms with us and is chill about it with no fuss, and get attacked with all kinds of accusations when you point it out because people are upset he turned out to be an actual human with actual mental illness that went to treatment, changed his mind and got divorced. Unfortunately you have to deal with the whole package because people are insane and I learned to insure myself. I just didn't want to air out my own personal grievances with my own community at the beginning.

Hello, in answer to you wanting to know more about the chappelle/mulaney issue and the relation to JM's addiction:

I'll try not to be too long (I failed) because I think it's ridiculous how much overreaction and lack of nuance/grace there is around JM. I'll tackle the whole timeline from before the intervention and also regarding the divorce and kid(s), because I think people wouldn't have been half as crazy if that hadn't also happened and it needs to be addressed.

So leading up to December 2020: AMT removed the mulaney name and his pics from her social media months before. His interviews started hinting that he was living on his own, and that he wasn't doing well (he started talking of death and his own funeral). It'll come out that both he and she were dealing with their own mental struggles. December 2020, she was not at his intervention. He stays in rehab for two months, so until mid-late February. He went to live in jimmy Kimmel's guest house. Olivia munn, who'd openly shown interest for him for years, happens to be near for work. they hook up, make a baby that is born late November. the divorce happens, and AMT seems surprised ("heartbroken"), she most likely thought it'd take longer or that he'd go back to her. JM and OM aren't dating, but decide to coparent: John was happy about the baby and absolutely wanted to be involved. they start dating a few months later. the official public news come quickly, and seem rushed, when in truth all these things hint at years of difficulties.

Bottom line: JM had been in and out of rehab and was freshly recovering when DC happened.

On the kid(s) and JM's and OM's relationship: people conveniently forget that JM said "I don't know NEVER, people CHANGE" regarding having children. When faced with an unplanned baby, he was happy and wanted to coparent. He later dated and married the baby's mother and they had another planned kid. Between the two kids OM battled breast cancer, had an hysterectomy and thus they got help from a surrogate, so yeah the second baby was very much planned and he very much likes having and caring for his kids. Meanwhile AMT said she froze her eggs due to society's pressure and wrote in her memoir that she did not want kids.

Bottom line: people freaked out because they forgot someone can change their mind about kids after getting sober and separated and stepping up when the baby comes anyway, they ignore all of the opinions of the ex they want to champion, and JM was touring with his kid and facing intense backlash because of this when DC happened.

Finally, on to the Dave Chappelle incident: freshly recovering addict, going through a divorce, new dad, on the road, putting together a new hour of material. He already had not one but two openers. The thing is that often, comedians drop in and add themselves as openers. I don't know how much agency the actual headliner has over this, if the venue has more say, if in the case they're both contracted with a same agency matters (like netflix). But considering the historical delicate moment for JM, and the fact DC is considered one of the best comedians, it must've been a tricky situation IF JM was even aware of the drama around DC. There is also to consider that the problematic jokes were, according to accounts from people in the audience, only a few of the entire set, and met with awkwardness. People cheered at the end for the other normal jokes. In those days DC had also been physically attacked (unrelated to transphobia), and JM offered sympathy for that. If he'd turned DC away, he probably would have suffered repercussions in the industry especially while being shaky after rehab. He's well respected by peers, but DC is still more famous and with more decades of brilliant work and they share a big network. JM couldn't afford the consequences of snubbing DC back then and not even now, actually.

All in all, 1: he didn't invite him, 2: he couldn't turn him away, 3: it's not his fault he couldn't "warn" the audience and he had no control over what DC would say.

JM has never ever talked badly about the queer community. On the contrary, he has openly expressed support through his jokes (concrete example: joined jokes in defense of trans kids with Nick Kroll at 2017 independent spirit awards monologue), and worked alongside queer creatives (concrete example: had Mae Martin on Everybody's in LA), openly stated he disapproves of punching down on people already suffering (can't find the interview sorry) and overall never made a fuss about the queer community or cancel culture. The only actual mention of "canceling" was in Baby J, regarding his addiction, and in the context that he can and has done way worse to himself: "What, you want to cancel JM? I'll KILL him. I almost did."

He did not "betray the queer fans that made him famous": for starters, he got famous because he's got the chops and the talent and did the open mic work and has a very particular and effective approach to comedy, I'm begging people to stop saying that because it's ridiculous and gets you made fun of. Since rehab and DC he's got even more famous. Got a few Emmys, hosted the Governor Awards, presented at the Oscars, turned down hosting them this year because he's too busy, Netflix gave him several blank checks. SNL has been celebrating the 50th season, and JM not only has hosted for the sixth time, but was part of the Feb 16th anniversary special during the opening monologue with Steve Martin and Martin Short, and managed to be given ten minutes to do one of his recurring musical sketches. He dressed Adam Driver as a hot dog and y'all are missing out.

In conclusion: JM is not who you should be mad about. He's not DC that has some weird senile feud with trans people even his fans are sick of, and he's certainly no JKR. JM has spoken and acted in support of the queer community more than once, yet it seems this one involuntary incident holds more weight in the indignation machine of the internet.

My sources: their social media, their subreddits where different people's accounts coincide/are very similar, talk show and written interviews (most notably this one, sorry it's behind paywall, I'd read it as my one free article of the month), AMT's memoir, JM's specials with a grain of salt.

It's a pity that Tumblr still freaks out about JM. Everybody's in LA is exactly the kind of whacky surreal entertainment it would love and Baby J is extremely quotable. You should all go watch the Hot Ones interview too.

This is... a lot of commentary when I only really wanted to know about the timeline.

Like. I get it, I am also like this about blorbos, I will admit I would have likely done something similar if someone asked a question about like... Satine from Star Wars? but I actually did not want to learn more about the divorce or Munn or the kids. I very much didn't want to know about all that.

Some of the other context for the Dave Chappelle question, sure, I get why the 'Mulaney was already on thin ice, Chappelle may have just shown up without warning, rejecting him may not have been an option' is relevant, but like... this is a dissertation on tumblr's hate for Mulaney.

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kinda aged from milk to yogurt? like i didn't care for the girlfriend first and then wife bits, both because i don't care for that kind of bits in general and because i thought she came across as annoying. not to take comedy bits as gospel because all comedy is an embellished and polished version of reality, but things like how he said she reacted at best buy, how he said she basically argued him into marriage, how in the "comedians in cars getting coffee" he said she would just criticize any choice of carpet he'd make and yeah she did (and before that he'd defended her against seinfield), several other things, and coupled with how other people have described encounters with her, yeah, like she's human of course and i dont really judge her, but on a skin level i find her annoying and i care not one bit that they divorced. good for them honestly my eyebrows were all the way up whenever he mentioned her and the way she spoke to him.

it's kind of how like Oh Hello aged (it's on netflix i highly recommend it). john's character george at one point tells to nick's character gil: "you think if you OD'd tomorrow anyone would give a shit?" and honestly that gives me the chills. Oh Hello was recorded in 2017.

many many things in all his specials were like cardboard signs saying "hey y'all should be a bit on guard". now instead he's an obviously invested parent, his life seems brighter in general. in a recent interview with kimmel he said sometimes he wonders if he actually did die a few years ago and this is heaven, where david letterman wants to hang out with him (it was very sweet and the interview with letterman is sooo interesting).

overall i think he aged like fine wine and his previous work aged like milk left to become yogurt, yep.

(like he finally looks his age and has the healthy weight he'd been missing. some people think he's had work done but if you look at pics of him from college he has the jawline and fuller cheeks. that's his natural look and the skinnier one isn't)

theres something so incredibly prolific about john mulaney's comeback kid special. i cant tell if it aged like milk or fine wine or maybe just a nice slightly stinky cheese. the whole bit with his wife who he is now divorced to, relating it to the movie the fugitive with the "i didnt kill my wife!" "ooo whos that fella, i bet he did kill his wife," and the whole bit about not wanting kids when he now has a kid, the office temp stories from when he was young and drinking and addicted to drugs and now how that happened again in his adult life, the bits about his parents sprinkled throughout and how it all comes in to the grand finale with bill clinton, the comeback kid, a political bit in the pre tr*mp era that hits just correctly and just at the right time to be funny for what it is, how he ties the fugitive back into it, then hits you with the "hey ellen" "cause he never forgets a bitch ever" and slam dunks the end with his dads law firm representing clinton. truly a work of art that could not have hit the same in literally any other year.

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When you go home everything looks different, 

and you’re scared of being left behind. x