#but in a lot of fiction it really does feel like people's default image of 'reptile' = 'evil'

[lizardywizard]

there's a bigger part of me that takes pride in being Monster to a sick society, but the "reptiles are abhorrent" trope really does get to me sometimes. we are just lil folks

[mizuruifan9]

Silly lil rant about the project sekai fandom( although I think it can apply to most fandoms) ,I've been getting videos and images on my fyp with people sharing their headcanons on other social medias, y'know whatever but in a lot of them the people in the comments are like "why is Nene black?" "Why does Tsukasa have to be autistic" " why is emu plus size?" "why is Akito trans " and that just really pisses me off as a queer teen who uses headcanons as a coping mechanism. Like let people have fun.

I think pushing your headcanons onto others is bad but that's besides the point

people complain that queer people are always projecting their identities onto characters and never cishet perisex people always assume that their identity is the default.

A lot of people aren't supported for who they are and headcanoning silly lil characters in a rhythm game with Hatsune Miku really helps and makes them feel less alone.

I have extreme gender dysphoria and I hate myself because of it. I can't get a binder so i have to bind with bandages? that's swag Rui does too.

I have trust issues? That's fire Mizuki also does. My mom keeps pressuring me to come out but won't let me get a binder, says I'll always be her little girl, and says she hopes I'll change my mind by the time I'm 18? That's cool Tsukasa also does :)

And then they also give me hope, headcanon that Mafuyu is transmasc? Well in canon he ran away with kanade and they are living happily together and if he can do that I can too :]

They are fictional characters and they can be whatever I want.

anyways I love you all <3333

[nyaawn]

Graphics Update & Derplander's face: A Research

or My Shallow Attempt to Make Sense Why That DT Derplander's Face Look So Oddly Different. For Science.

(Ok I know the benchmark has been out for more than a week and a lot has been said about it, but I was busy and only had time to mess around with it recently. Tho actually no I didn't have time and I really should sleep rather than spend my remaining braincells mulling over freaking fictional character's face. But pesky part of my brain would keep bothering me about it otherwise. So let me try putting my finger on it)

On last Live Letter broadcast they open with benchmark trailer. I thought, "Oh nice. Since I also play a Derplander I can just watch their trailer to see the graphic update on his fac---"

.

.

.

"... ...... .....Who is that?"

This Derplander was so confused and as Derplander main I was left deeply concerned.

What the heck happened?? Is it the update? Is it the new hair? Hair change can change his face so much? Why he look so off? Whhhyyyyyyyy-------

Benchmark downloaded, I embarked to find the truth *insert dramatic bgm here*

First thing in my mind, well we see that in livestream, of course streaming quality would made it look bad. Hence I start with running the benchmark right away with default character setting. The result, now I have better image quality, I can clearly see his skin texture etc and he does looks better, but still so different than what I used to. Oh dear am I doomed with this graphic update.... Well let's see how he fare in character creator next. I put in the usual Derplander/Ardbert face setting: Hyur, Midlander, medium build, Face type #5 or #7.... Hmm wait they touch up Face#7?

Yep, Face#7 isn't simply 'Face#5-with-stubble-slapped-on' anymore. There's plenty of contouring going on now. It's like make up, tho irl people use it to look flawless, here they use it to make him more flawed lol. Frown lines, dark and bright smudges to increase the rugged appearance. That highlight on his forehead almost distractingly so. It sure make his brow bones look like they jut out a lot more. Maybe that's why his forehead look so bright and prominent in that trailer? But all in all they do give the face more dimension and suitably older without changing the face model itself, which is smart. Other than contouring, they only change the eye shape a bit with sharper corner. Oh and thicker eyebrows, for some reason...

Alright, that cover the face type. Moving on with the rest of his face: Eye#1, Nose#1, Lip#1. No big change with them, at least none that I can see. Next, color: eyes blue, no lip coloring. Done!

The result... is still the Derplander that I know and familiar with. Older and more rugged, yes. But that's him alright.

WAIIIIT,,,, everyone else complain that their character look off in Character Creator but look alright in benchmark cutscene, why I'm the opposite?? I think he look okay in CC but look different in cutscene. Wth happened here?

Still scratching my head, I throw him into benchmark and...

Oh. Oooh, I see now.. Apparently, they didn't use that setting anymore...

I made wrong assumption that they use Derplander usual character setting as default WoL like in previous benchmarks. Then further assumed the change I saw was chiefly because of graphic update. But as you can see, for default they use different nose and jaw. Add those to the change with face type I mentioned above. It's not that the DT trailer Derplander's face feel different. It is different face.

*headdesk* OKAY PROBLEM SOLVED I GUESS (ﾉಥ▿ಥ）ﾉ彡┻━┻

.........

Naaah, I already staring at his face for so long only to reach such anticlimactic conclusion. Let's stare some more! *sunkcostfallacy*

Well, ignoring the new hairstyle and its floating sideburns (kek), now they use jaw#4 and nose#5, I think? And tho it can't be seen clearly in that gif quality, they also change his eye color. Before I thought it's just because of lighting, but they really change them to green hue rather than his previous blue (you got Mako-juiced bro?). I think I understand why they made those change tho. When paired with his old face, that new hairstyle can make his lower face look strangely short/squished (which was my concern when they unveil that hair in cg trailer. Even in real life that kind of hairstyle could mess with head balance). Hence the change to wider, longer jaw. And to balance that jaw, bigger nose. Dunno what with his eye tho.

It's not very noticeable but there's one more change they made, however it's one I completely onboard with: His skin color. After giving his CG counterpart a tan (hooray!), finally they also give his in-game model a (veeeeerrry sliiight) tan (still HOORAAY!). I've been saying for years that he look too pale. WoL supposedly running around under the sun all the time, why in tarnation he was still as pale as milk. This time, though I only eyeballed it, from various comparison pic I think I can say with some confidence they had moved quite a few step down that skintone table:

I would prefer they also take a step to the right (which is the skintone that I give to my own WoL, and even with that I still often think mine's too pale. But to change it I need to pay for another fanta, so I left him be), but hey baby step. At least he's more strawberry milk now rather than just milk.

Anyway, others might not think he look that different from before. But maybe since I played with him for thousand and thousand of hours, even a slight difference can cause uncomfortable sense of wrongness. This is also the case for numerous players who complained that their WoLs looks off, I guess. Though their case certainly isn't a dumb character setting mistake like mine, that graphic update sure can change character's vibe. Fortunately after scrutinizing it for some time, I think I can live with it? At least for most part..

The update change lighting and texture across the board, and maybe some modeling too? For characters, one of most visible overhaul is their skin. In that skin, well, look even more like skin, for better or worse. In face type#5 /#7 that Derplander use, his laugh lines and sunken cheek are fairly discernible now.

Same chara setting, very similar angle and lighting, across different builds. With the new lighting shadow falls more naturally, in effect giving a rounder, less dramatic impression. But more than that, those visible facial lines along with further detailed eye wrinkles make him seem a looot older. While the guy in the left might go "I'm going on an adventure!", the man in right look tired of all worldly affairs..

That said, I don't mind it that much. I want my WoL to look older with time, so I'm okay with this. Players who also use this face type but don't want their WoL to suddenly turn into middle aged man might feel different, however. Not to mention the more realistic facial lines could push it towards uncanny valley. Will need some time to get used to it, that's for sure.

But one graphic update quirk that I'm less enthusiastic with is: eyeline. I wonder, it seems there's something going on with how this new lighting interact with eye area, in that when eye rim fall under shadow of something the eyeliner immediately goes wild:

See his left eye? Nothing else change here, just his hair. But when his eye fall under shadow of sidebangs, bam. Thick eyeliner make its glorious appearance and suddenly he look super evil (Tho to be fair this shot is hardly flattering and most WoLs I saw look highly menacing there. It's just those dark rims brought him an extra malm). Maybe this is why many Viera players complained about weird eyelines? Thankfully in other lighting/ non-closeup those eyeliners seems to go away. In other scenes all version of him looks okay enough.

.............

So TL:DR I made mistake assuming the odd difference I saw was because graphic update, while in reality it's because they use different face setting altogether. I think I'm going to be fine just using Derplander's old setting going forward as thankfully the update didn't change him too badly. Imo for most part I think the new graphic looks superb even.

But yeah that eyeliner man. I hope they can tell it to chill down a bit. I'm looking forward to the further adjustment they said they'll do. Hopefully Derplander can retain his fairly nice guy, slightly derpy look that we know and love, and less looking like a guy who's ready to start his villain origin story.

........or maybe he already started? 🤔

oh well thanks for glancing at my TED talk. Ima going to sleep now...

[plethoraworldatlas]

This is the cover to the original 1977 Traveller boxed set, now commonly referred to as "Classic Traveller." Because of this iconic cover, May 1st is celebrated as "Traveller Day."

There's been a lot of talk lately about RPG covers in the last week (thanks WotC). So I thought, what better time to reflect on the finest one of all?

I insist that this is not merely old school rose-colored nostalgia. It's not merely "good for its time." I really think this is perfect in a way that no other RPG cover has achieved before or since. Change a single word, a single punctuation, a single nanometer to the kerning, and you have something lesser. And if you're not convinced, then I'm going to explain everything that I like about this image and why. Everything. Yeah, this post is ridiculous overkill. About as bad an idea as explaining a joke. But I want it all to be said.

Setting the Stage

For most games, the cover's purpose is this: set the right expectations as effectively as possible. And in order to do that, you need to first understand what the game inside is all about.

So, what is Traveller about?

Traveller is a science fiction RPG made by Marc Miller. It's old. Really old. It's had about 12 editions or so, changing hands from one publisher to the next as the decades have gone by. But the classic version from 1977, just three little black booklets in a box, remains a respected and well-loved game.

It's the granddaddy of its genre in this medium. In the same way that people use D&D as a catch-all option for any fantasy premise (epic quests, treasure-hunting, exploration, survival, mystery, horror, politics, warfare...), Traveller is the same thing but for spaceman stories. But also like how D&D still has a "default campaign" in the form of the dungeoncrawl, the default Traveller campaign could best be described as "space truckers." A very common comparison is the TV series Firefly, although it can become a lot like The Expanse if the players get ambitious. It's grounded and gritty.

The design highly prioritizes strict simulationism, especially for things which can seem... irrelevant to the act of adventure. Instead, gameplay usually focuses on the mundane. It's kind of a slice of life game, where you imagine all the less exciting parts of what it's like to work a blue collar job in the far future. It's a game about paying your mortgage, going through customs at space ports, maybe doing some market analysis if you're feeling frisky. Everything that other games would normally choose to handwave. Dwell on the little things. Even better, all this attention given to the non-exciting stuff serves to deepen those sporadic moments of thrilling drama and danger.

But in addition to the life of spacefaring adventure played with your friends, Traveller also contains a second game just for the referee to play. The task of worldbuilding is formalized into a procedural activity, meant to be enjoyed on its own separate from the "main game." The text offers you a blank template to make a star subsector, rules and tables for populating it, and prompts for bringing it to life. Later editions of the game eventually committed to a canonical setting for the franchise, fleshing it out with more and more products to sell you. But the spirit of the classic era is to make it up yourself. The phrase "In My Traveller Universe" (IMTU) is an iconic part of the game and is routinely invoked within the community.

Lastly, Traveller is also known for being horribly unforgiving. Chances are, if you know nothing else about it, the first thing you'll probably hear is that "it's the game where you can die during character creation." They aren't joking.

So with all that in mind, how does a cover achieve its goal? Most games do it chiefly through subject matter. That's why D&D-likes always show a group of brave heroes locked in combat with mythical creatures. But Traveller's cover shows... a distress call. What does that tell you to expect?

(Continued in article)

[hotlineinput]

Finally, I could mod an NPV into the game so these two are together! Fucking finally! (no pun intended)

If it was not like extremely super late where I'm living, I'd really go great lengths about how much this means to me. Oh well, I guess a short version goes, too: all my life I've had stories, even more specifically, ships like this several times. Like, several times. And it has always been bothering me that I have practically no skills to depict them just like the way I wanted. I was told to learn drawing, and I appreciate the intention, I even tried for a while, but I've never had neither the time management skills, nor the default disposition, or inherent talent?, or affinity, call whatever you want, to draw.

With the way I created Nathan and Siara in Cyberpunk 2077 I'm still a bit far from what I exactly had in my head but it's pretty close. And I can feel it, when I work with AMM, and/or with Photo Mode, that yes, this is what I've been daydreaming all alone! The thing I want to tell, to show people, the thing I may convert to a non-Cyberpunk-affiliated indie video game one day!

This ship also means a lot to me, much more than the previous ones with previous OCs I had because, while I haven't written up much about it, I have a pretty solid image in my head about how things are going between them. And even if I'm biased, I can't help but feel this is the first time in my life, I have a nuanced understanding, and a proper depiction of a mature romance. Sadly, most romance in fiction is not mature, from my experience. (the fact Edgerunners does was huge inspiration to me)

Soooo yeah that's Nathan X Siara for you. My OC couple I came up with to tell a story I maybe should have told, and arguably should have been able to tell a looooooooong time ago.

[sepublic]

G1 Starscream Ramblings

           The interesting thing to me about G1 Starscream, specifically the one from the cartoon is… He very much gives me ‘young upstart vibes’, the hot-headed rookie that’s fresh into war, just graduated, and is eager to fight and prove himself. Especially with his line about how ‘his time will come’, I get the vibe that Starscream sees Megatron as almost being outdated hardware, some crankety old-timer whose come and gone and outlived his prime (eventually literally as of the movie), which fits with how Megs was around since the beginning and founded the Decepticons from the start.

           And it’s this disrespectful, irreverent attitude, that constant questioning because he lacks experience and assumes it’s way simpler and easier than it actually is… It all just (star)screams new, fresh recruit who thinks he’s all that, wide-eyed and idealized and thinking he can take on the entire world, instead of being a battle-hardened veteran who’s been humbled and is more prone to the realities of war and its complexities. It’d play into Starscream being so power-hungry, wanting instant gratification and glory, and always being impatient about this sort of thing without really thinking things through, he’s an impulsive brat.

           Maybe he’s even the Cybertronian equivalent to a rich brat who got where he did thanks to his family’s high-end connections, and so there’s always that judging from more experienced soldiers about how Starscream is clearly operating on a lot of privilege, wearing shoes multiple sizes too big for him, and generally making a fool of himself as he parades around, treating the whole situation like an opportunity for fame and adulation, like he’s some celebrity indulging in the fun, and not a general and a commander who has to keep fighting for the cause, make the right and mature calls, all that.

           Because it’s worth noting that a lot of times in G1, he ends up acting out-of-line and doing costly maneuvers that hinder the Decepticons- Most notably, trying to bury the Autobots and accidentally awakening them in the process. And it’s this eagerness to get into fighting and prove himself that leads to Starscream short-sightedly wanting to focus on attacking the Autobots because they’re right there, picking a fight- When Megatron, who is older and more level-headed, has to steer this brash new kid in the right direction, set him on track with the proper agenda and mission. Maybe whip him into shape a bit, and this could all play into Megs’ patience because Starscream is just a dumb kid, so he’s willing to give him some more doubt- Give Starscream some time to actually cool down and taste reality and he’ll surely fall into line.

           He’s like some kid who grew up on military propaganda and bought into a bit too well, saw himself too much in those glamorous posters and manufactured, idealized images; So he’s pretty disappointed that it doesn’t turn out the way he expected it to. Starscream is like that popular kid in high school who always had a clique trailing behind him, and he kind of took it for granted how much he meant to these people because clearly their worlds revolve around him, which makes him all the more blindsided when he turns for help and his ‘friends’ immediately abandon him at the drop of a hat.

          All of Starscream’s ‘friends’ and social situations were blatantly manufactured and brought up by somebody else, but he thinks it was all him so he’s in for a real shock when Starscream is by himself- And people don’t immediately fall in line at his beck and call, so he falters. He’s out of his environment, just graduated all of his usual tricks don’t work, try as he might to stubbornly reapply them like a hammer with anything that looks remotely nail-shaped. It’s this kind of idiotic hypocrisy that makes Starscream not realize that people who do put up with him only do so because they have to, and/or they’re opportunistically kissing up to his façade the way he does with others. Starscream’s grandiose imagination and outlandish, fantasy ‘ideas’ straight out of fiction and films that clearly don’t work in real life, clearly need to be reined in.

           I also like to think that similar to that comparison I made earlier, he DOES have connections- Maybe it’s a Team Rocket situation, where the character is incompetent… But they had a parent who the leader greatly respected, and so they begrudgingly put up with their kid’s foolish antics and incompetent failures out of respect for that posthumous minion’s last wishes. Kind of like Hopper from A Bug’s Life really wanting to kill his brother, but because his mother explicitly told him NOT to on her deathbed, he kind of has to force himself not to because he still feels beholden to her- But there’s certainly no warmth on his end just because that person he respects, was fond of this dude he hates.

           It could factor into Megatron constantly tolerating Starscream as a thorn in his side… And really, Starscream seems to be even more of an idiot at times than Megatron, what with Megatron going into a spiel that one time about how Starscream lost because he lacked strategy. Perhaps Starscream is, like, SUPER skilled in combat, a beast and a force to be reckoned with on the battlefield; And if he’s doing so well and he’s so strong, then surely this means he’s fit to be leader, because obviously the Decepticon who’s the best fighter should lead, right? It’s a gross oversimplification of a narrow-minded worldview… And I imagine Starscream also somewhat got where he was because of privilege, so he kind of takes a lot of things for granted here about how the Decepticon faction works and its hierarchy and rules.

          Perhaps Starscream being an utter beast in combat contributes to Megatron keeping him around- He IS useful, he just needs some proper guidance and a good head to productively channel that ability. He’s confusing fighting ability with actual tactical leadership and charisma, but beyond that, Starscream clearly knows how to get out of a scrape, and has no reservations about playing dirty to add to his already potent combat skills as-is. So Megatron still has some hopes for Starscream, while sternly warning him not to make him regret his decision in further tolerating his nonsense- Because Megatron likes to think he’s a forgive and forget kind of guy, but only to people who justify themselves in his eyes as being strong and powerful, traits he actually respects.

          Maybe Megatron even sees a little bit of his young self in Starscream, and so there’s that hope for a pay-off; That if he just gives Starscream a chance and proper guidance, that if the kid has someone who can set him on the right track and help him figure things out- Then he can really live up to his potential! Because that’s what Starscream is- Potential. Raw, untapped potential, clumsily thrown about and unrefined… But it’s there and Megatron would hate to make a waste of it, especially since this whole conflict is about resources; Even the hedonistic Decepticons have to be mindful of how they use things, how efficient they are.

           Of course, having his constant patience and mercy, his tolerating, waiting in eternal hope for his investment into Starscream to finally pay off… Megatron is tired of giving him second chances, tired of how ungrateful this brat is, and how his failures keep adding up. So when Starscream straight-up throws him out to die, coupled with his reformatting into Galvatron… And Galvatron’s had about enough of this, he’s done and sick and tired of Starscream’s antics. After having people put up with him for so long, Starscream really begins to overestimate just how important and useful he is to them, that eventually he’ll reach a point where his negatives outweigh his positives, but he never considers this and believes he’ll always be allowed back into the fold after each betrayal…

          Literally everything about Starscream’s coronation yells in-over-his-head kid who really has to compensate for his lack of leadership and respect from others by playing up the adulation and the glamour, but… If he HAD been given a chance to actually lead, his reckless impatience and short-sightedness would’ve definitely led the Decepticons to ruin, and someone would’ve had to stage a coup. Even Starscream’s use in combat would stop paying off for him as he becomes too much of a liability.

          And it’s this inexperienced, clearly insecure demeanor that makes Starscream impatiently yell at the Constructicons to get to the point. He really can’t make up his mind and stick to it, so even though he has this music being played in the first place, Starscream just as quickly regrets and finds it annoying because he’s not particularly deliberate nor thoughtful about what he does. He knows what others think of them, that they don’t respect nor take him seriously, and it gets to his head and makes him irrationally angry because he doesn’t know to handle this, he expected this to be so much easier, to be as simple and done as THIS. Starscream really isn’t equipped to handle actually navigating around people from a charismatic standpoint and earning their trust, especially given his history as backstabber who has no concept of loyalty and bonds because he’s arrogant enough to think he can do it all on his own.

          And when faced with genuine adversity and reality, as we see… Starscream very immaturely fumbles and trips, and then defaults to begging and pleading because he hasn’t built up much of a spine, and he’s still an idealistic kid who clearly hasn’t built himself up and his fortitude all that well. He’s promising with snot dribbling down his nose that he won’t screw up this time, please give him a second chance he didn’t MEAN it, he seriously did not expect nor consider the consequences of his actions, nor how they could backfire and blow up in his face.

          Starscream is an upper-class snob who doesn’t really get it, he’s eager for approval because he’s young but also clearly selfish and ungrateful about it, because he’s always entitled to that thing and so when it DOES come around, it both means a lot, but also it’s about time, he was waiting for so long just to get the bare minimum he was owed, don’t pat yourself on the back for doing what you’re already meant to. And when things go wrong, Starscream blunders and starts to doubt himself because he was pampered, privileged, and sheltered, constantly told he was amazing- And so he doesn’t actually know how to handle failure and was always used to things coming easily to him on a silver platter, while having someone else to clean up the mess for him and protect him from the consequences. Starscream doesn’t appreciate the actual work that it takes for things, he’s basically spoiled and out of his environment in this military setting where nobody is having it.

           Of course, when Starscream IS spared and recovers, he then silently fumes because he totally would’ve succeeded had THIS happened, or if this other person hadn’t screwed up- And then he fails to learn any of his lessons and keeps trying to take over and take charge, because obviously he knows better and he thinks all of his ideas are the best in the world. When faced with past failures, he doesn’t learn he just denies them as soon as they’re not being shoved in his face anymore, like a child who wet the bedsheets and is now frantically hiding them. He has no real clue nor idea about what he’s doing, but as soon as it’s over he again takes for granted the safety net that his fellow Decepticons begrudgingly provide, and wants again continues to test their patience and resources.

           So, when Galvatron DOES come around and kill Starscream- The Decepticons are clearly elated, and if we’re being real here… They were all probably thinking of ways to assassinate or depose Starscream, or at least play to his ego so he could remain a figurehead who occasionally goes out into battle doing the one thing he’s good at, while his oh-so-loyal lieutenants do the dirty, unglamorous work of actually being a tactician and leader for hm. Starscream wants all of the power and fame, but like- NONE of the actual work and responsibility, that’s too much for him to actually work on so he just stamps his foot frustratedly when others don’t treat him with the respect he deserves, because he DOES recognize his own potential and expects other to revere Starscream for what he could be, VS what he actually currently is… And because he’s so caught up in the idea of what he thinks he’ll inevitably be, he never works on his current self so he can actually get to that point.

           Like I said- Galvatron killing him saved the Decepticons a LOT of much-needed stress and headaches. It got that young brat and upstart out of the way so they could all get to business and not have to deal with his nonsense anymore, because he ain’t getting any deader! There was some hesitation about what COULD be lost if they did away with him, but now he’s gone and so all they can do is just reap the benefits of Starscream’s death! It’s almost relieving- Like YEAH, we were prepared on how to handle this… But then Galvatron came and made things so much easier, he got this off our hands and he’s clearly bold and decisive and knows what he’s doing, taking out Starscream made him VERY popular, in addition to basically being Megatron with a new coat of paint;

           Up until his lava-bath fried his circuits… And then Galvatron basically became the Decepticon Leader Starscream that everybody feared, ironically enough. And then it was Cyclonus who had to do the job of looking after this dude, who was less a reckless young upstart and more like a senile old veteran gone mad and blindly waving his cane around; And then complications get worse when Starscream somehow returns as a GHOST, because why not? Sure, let’s go with that, we already have Galvatron seemingly saving us from Starscream, only to become the new one… Let’s compare him with the original and see what happens, why not? There must’ve been a lot of collective groans of exhaustion at each and every new development.

          The Decepticons must be so exasperated, it really feels like they’ve been on a downward slope, outlived their prime and golden age since the Battle of Autobot City… Yet despite Megatron’s failures they remember him fondly because he did a lot of other things right, was otherwise charismatic, and seemed pretty close to actually winning, all things considered. And so the Decepticons are too caught up in their delusional nostalgia and what-ifs, the way Starscream is about his own future, to really remember that Megatron kind of screwed them over with that risky, costly maneuver that clearly didn’t pay off.

[saltyotomereviews]

A dangerous shadow organization launches a campaign of fear and violence in the city of Shinjuku, pushing society to the brink of chaos. As a young police officer tasked with restoring order, you become the target of an attack, and have a poisonous collar attached to your neck. With the situation spiraling out of control and time running out, five mysterious strangers appear to aid you in your quest for the truth. 

Source: Nintendo eShop

Hi everyone!

I think it’s appropriate that the first game I review on here is the first otome game I’ve ever purchased for my Switch. So let’s get onto it!

I had extremely high hopes for this game. Everything about it just seemed exactly like something I’d enjoy. I love mystery stories, I love dark otomes with a lot of angst and this game had it all, at least from what I saw on the Nintendo eShop page. As I do with all the otome games I played, I went into this completely blind with only my high expectations and a hope that this was finally going to be the next big thing for me, the next game that would truly fill that hole in me that craves for affection from fictional characters. But did it live up to that?

Localization and Port Quality

I don’t have much to say in regards to this so it isn’t going to be long (trust me, there will come times where this will be VERY long), but the localization seemed perfectly fine and so did the port, although there were a few instances of characters, Akito Sera specifically, calling the MC by her default name despite me changing it at the beginning.

Art, Music & Everything in-between

I personally was a very big fan of the art style. Firstly, it looks very... shiny? The lighting is always on point and makes the characters stand out, is what I’m trying to say. Also the colors are just very pleasing to the eye in general. They’re overall on the lighter, less saturated side which does fit the games overall aesthetic better than bright colors would in my opinion. It is a little more on the “basic side” as the characters are not too stylized and basically all of them are very conventionally good looking. I honestly can’t recall a single character looking old or in any way non-conventionally attractive, but hey it’s an otome game that’s supposed to attract as many people as possible so do I blame them? No. Also a little tiny complaint that’s basically just nit-picking, sometimes the mouths look a little weird to me but that may come down to just personal preference.

The next thing I’ll talk about is something that’s tied pretty closely to the art, at least in my opinion, yet I don’t see it mentioned very often and that is the game's actual layout design. Now this one, if there’s ONE thing I’d have to choose in this game as my absolute favorite it would be the layout design. It really brings the game to life and makes the somewhat mundane gameplay much more enjoyable. I mean, as much as we all love I love visual novels, it really is just pressing a button to make text appear. But these text boxes? How they change position depending on who’s talking *chef’s kiss*. It’s such a small change that does do much in terms of enjoyment. I’ll let the images speak for themselves.

(some of my other favorites)

Doesn’t that look so neat??

Anyways, let’s get to the music. Again, I am no expert when it comes to this. All I can tell is whether I like how it sounds and whether I think it creates a good atmosphere and honestly, this game has both of these nailed down! Whenever “Gunshot Wound” suddenly started playing I felt myself snap into action, while “Insanity to the Moonlit Night” helped to create a real feeling of unease in me. But the more casual BGM like “Breakfast Time” helped with the atmosphere just as much, helping to relax you a bit before the action erupts again. My personal favorite is probably the main title BGM “The Monochrome City”. I would be lying if I said I didn’t occasionally stay in the main menu just a tad bit longer to listen to it. Honestly, the only thing I’m missing in regards to music is a proper music player where you can skip or rewind to a specific part of the song. :(

Now to the meat and bones of this review, the actual game. This will only include my overall thoughts on the story and other gameplay related details, as I will be making a separate review for each of the routes.

Plot

I tend to separate otome games into two categories; the ones where the overarching plot changes minimally between routes, the LI you experience it with being the main difference (Psychedelica of the Black Butterfly), and the ones where there either isn’t an overarching plot (Amnesia, Taisho x Alice) or there is one, but the details and even some events change heavily depending on who’s route you play (Code: Realize, Cinderella Phenomenon). 

Collar x Malice most definitely fits into the first category and it makes sense. CxM is a mystery game where your main task is figuring out the details of the X-Day Incidents no matter who’s route you’re on so of course it’s a main component of all of them. I still can’t help but think it could have been done better somehow though. Many of the scenes pertaining to the X-day incidents seemed to be word-for-word copy-pasted between routes with minimal changes, which while tolerable on my second playthrough, got pretty annoying by the third, fourth, fifth time playing through the game. The small differences there were sadly didn’t make the huge chunks of repeated text all that much more enjoyable and only successfully stopped me from pressing the “skip all” button, since of course the regular skip didn't work as the scenes still counted as “new text”. I did enjoy how each of the routes focused on a specific X-day incident in more detail, but that sometimes didn’t feel like enough, especially for the routes where the romance, the other big component, wasn’t all that strong for me (and there were a few). Do I understand why the routes were the way they were? Absolutely. Do I still wish it were different? Yeah.

Plot-wise, the best route was most definitely Yanagi’s, it felt the most whole as we finally got closure by the end. Though that’s what I’d expect from the poster boy who’s route is quite obviously the main, “true” route. But if I were to choose a favorite, purely from my enjoyment of the route, Kei Okizaki would be number 1 no questions asked. I did play his route first so he didn’t suffer from the “repeated scenes” problem, but I think that was more of a bonus rather than something that heavily impacted my enjoyment of his route. If I played his route second or third, I’d still like him just as much.

Overall, I’d rate the routes (story-wise) like so:

Aiji Yanagi

Kageyuki Shiraishi

Kei Okazaki

Mineo Enomoto & Takeru Sasazuka (They are on-par for me honestly)

But in order of personal enjoyment I’d rank them like so:

Kei Okazaki

Kageyuki Shiraishi

Aiji Yanagi

Mineo Enomoto

Takeru Sasazuka

Other Gameplay Features:

This section isn’t going to be included in all of my reviews as a lot of otome games don’t have extra features, but this one does so let’s talk about it. The ones I wanted to mention are the quick-shoot minigame where you have to wait for the gun’s pointer to align with the target and “shoot” at the right time, and the crime scene investigation where you get to search a crime scene and find details to help you solve the case at hand. I enjoyed both of them as they really helped to spice up the gameplay. With the shooting minigame I especially liked how shooting/not shooting/shooting at the wrong time actually had an impact on the story in some way, but I did have a slight issue with the crime scene investigations and that is the fact there simply wasn’t enough of them. :( There seemed to be only one, at most two, per route which did not seem like enough especially with how, at least to me, it seemed to be advertised as a big part of the game. I’d also prefer if they were... harder? FOr example if there were more things we could press but we’d have to specifically choose the relevant ones. I know it isn’t the main focus of the game but can you blame me? I was teased with a crime investigation that ended up just being about clicking the same four items over and over until my investigation partner/love interest announced we got everything. 

Final Thoughts

I’ll keep this short and sweet as I feel as though I’ve rambled on for long enough already. Would I recommend this game? Yes, I would. I personally did not enjoy the game as much as I thought I would, but I’d say that’s mostly because I’ve set an incredibly high standard for otome games that barely any actually manage to reach. The game looks stunning, has a cool story and the characters, while maybe not my favorite, will certainly charm many others. Clearly much work was put into this game making it’s 40 dollar price tag seem pretty reasonable, at least for a Switch otome game. I call myself "Salty Otome Reviews” and I am extremely picky, but I wouldn’t want to discourage people from playing a genuinely good game just because of my through the roof standards. So yes go ahead and play it and if you do happen to dislike or get salty over the same parts I did, I’ll be here for you and we can be all salty over it together.

You all stay critical and I will stay salty.

See you next time!

Individual Route Reviews: Coming Soon!

[chemicalarospec]

A Look At Dan’s Recent Branding

AKA I Make Up a Bunch of Stuff About Media and Perception and Promotion and Branding and Say the Same Things Over and Over

I’m so sorry this is actually horrendously long. I’m a loquacious a$$hole.

So I started rambling in the tags of this post began thinking about Dan’s  presence recently. The reason so many of us fell for the red chairing was because it actually seemed possible -- perhaps not a proper joint video, but a cameo or side role.

Now that the video’s out, I can see it has very strong Solo Phil vibes, but I can still imagine a few different ways Dan could have been in it if he wanted to be. (Side note: It also feels like a run-of-the-mill, everyday, video, though seasonal, and not a festive special, despite the content. idk, I blame it on the lack of decoration and boring grey wall. cue clowning for more spoopy content though.) Dan is not in the video, so he must not have wanted to be in it. Why? 

Before I talk more, let’s just talk about “branding” for a bit. I use it interchangeably with “image”/”public image”/”public persona”/”common connotations”/”associations” here (kinda wrongly), but I default to “branding” because it’s what the phandom (possibly even Dan and Phil themselves?) use the most frequently -- “image” is perhaps the best-fitting term. Regardless, in a very general example, if Stephen King wrote a fluffy teenage romance book, it would be “off-brand” for him. That’s what we’re talking about here. Except with Dan and smaller differences.

It’s also worth noting that Dan and Phil were not always Dan-and-Phil -- I remember seeing an early liveshow clip where Dan says they’re not a double act. I’m pretty sure the radio show in 2013/early 2014 followed by the launch of the gaming channel in 2014 is when they became a “double act” --  the BBC absolutely billed them as such. 

You can see what I’m getting at here: Dan is trying to drop the “and Phil” in a softer way than he dropped the “isnotonfire” back in 2017. However, it’s definitely worth noting that he had already distanced himself quite a bit from it before the official name change, with first the shorter fringe and then the curls being a visual representation of that. And it’s probably just a mental thing on my part, but curly Dan now looks different from curly Dan-with-Phil.

Okay so first, why is he trying to change his image? Like his first evolution, a major component is being more mature -- llamas and malteasers didn’t simply not represent Dan anymore, they represented a younger, less mature Dan. He didn’t like it anymore. Does Dan not like who we view him as now? My first instinct is “no,” because his current connotations are fairly empty, but I don’t really know, so I’ll just move on.

What do we associate with Dan right now? i. e. what’s “on brand” for him? Well, again, there’s not a lot of strong specifics, at least for me. After two years for being nearly absent from the internet and very clearly growing a lot as a person, Daniel hasn’t talked enough for there to be only the basics left: tall, British, memes, and gay.

Okay, but the gay. Dan and Phil have been out for one year, but being part of The Gays is a pretty big part of their branding. This is because of their already long-standing reputation, more specifically their attachments to the community -- all those teenage girls turning out to be lesbians and, of course, the shipping.

The Gay is also an answer to the next question: What different aspects of his image is he pushing? Again, that he’s more mature and serious -- the UN talk, for example. I’m not counting the book here because that’s the product of the changes, not content being used to create a shift.

The big thing I want to focus on is the attitude video series. I’m very curious as to how this came about to be and don’t know enough details to say some things, but one thing I can note is that the plug for You Will Get Through This Night is a really small part of it. It’s literally the last thing he says, and they don’t even show the cover. It’s so skippable, and while it’s good that means they all really care about the important content of the series, it does create some questions.

To be honest, all of the attitude/This Night content is kind of strange to me. For example, the quote they used to promote it doesn’t mention the book, which just looks bad. This Night isn’t really the center of the collab -- it’s more general mental health awareness and activism.

So that’s the first thing Dan’s trying to put into his image. The podcast (Get Britain Talking or something like that) is, I feel, more directly part of marketing This Night, though of course, like with the video series, the content itself is emphasized and important and I should treat it as such.

Back to attitude. attitude is “the UK’s best selling gay magazine.” Why is Dan trying to build connotations to things he already is? No, but actually this gives insight on how he’s trying to be perceived: he’s a confident gay man. This magazine with its connotations (formal media, queer, well-established) will come up should someone new search up Dan -- obviously that’s not the direct reason; it’s a representation of his public image. 

Why is he trying to create this image? Right now, us in the phandom are probably 90% of the people tuned into Daniel’s actions. We’ve already built up a lot about him, and though we don’t want to admit it, we do like Dan-and-Phil, the double act. Overall, I do think Dan will not change our image of him as much as he’d like, but he has changed it more than we might think -- for example, people talking about how “mature” and “grown-up” he is in new photos. 

I think I’m just stupid, but these pushes don’t seem to be needed for You Will Get Through This Night. Okay so the problem here is “how do you get people to buy a book?” An author’s broader public persona doesn’t really impact this. I’m not going to hear about a mental health book written by an ex-Youtuber and search up the author. I’m not going to hear about a mental health book written by an ex-Youtuber in my normal book searching, period.

You know where I could see myself finding out about a book like this, and what would get people to buy the book? Doing mainstream interviews specifically about it; I’ll read TIME interviews with anyone, so long as it seems mildly interesting. But Dan’s not doing that, not a lot, not yet. (I bet he will later.)

I guess what I’m saying is the attitude video series is periphery media that impacts his branding but does not reach a large audience; it’s impact is atmospheric, not promotional.

(Dude it’s 10:30 at this point I’m not sure what I’m saying.) (also I rearranged these paragraphs sorry if it reads poorly)

Dan is a private person. He has made this extensively clear throughout the years and in the most recent content. What this means is I don’t believe he wants to update his branding just for the sake of accuracy to self.

So it’s (partially) for something else, but the public framing clearly goes beyond This Night. The obvious answer is that Dan’s just trying to return to the public eye, but then I still ask why???

The attitude series is not an end goal -- i. e. it is a building block for something. I mean, I just don’t think Dan’s like “yeah I want to create content again and this is the content I want to create,” simply because it started out seeming like an extension of the interview and now it’s clearly more than that, but it’s still like, for the magazine. It’s not his.

So what’s Dan going to do with this status of being a queer content creater and mental health advocate he’s curating? So remember how there’s a 99% chance he’s doing something w/ television but there’s been no official announcement? Yeah, that. 

I had a few paragraphs talking about book-adjacent media (interviews, reviews, ect.) vs television-adjacent media but all of it was me 100% making stuff up so it’s gone now. Basically, I *think* if he were to make a show, fiction or non-fiction, people would search him up and write a small description of him, and I *think* this is less likely for You Will Get Through This Night, so I *think* this reputation-building is in preparation of the former, not the latter.

Isabelle, you spent over an hour on this, do you actually have anything interesting to say?

Freaking *waves hands* promotional-- social dynamics-- what the heck actually is branding at this point-- Dan show.

TL;DR: It might just be the French in me (or just *my* French relatives?), but life is manipulation and Dan is trying to drop “and Phil” from his name and is manipulating his public image to be more mature, with a focus on being one of The Gays and a mental health advocate. Because it’s not vibin’ as This Night promotion/set-up, it is likely setup for promotion for another project, probably the TV one.

TL;DR 2: Just read the tags on the original post I literally didn’t have to say any of this except for “television theory”.

[secretlystephaniebrown]

Steph's story wasn't even a weight thing because it was ONLY the ass and chest that were being drawn attention to & they were constantly drawn attention to which meant that DC made us watch a 16-17 year old girl (who is also a sexual assault victim) clothes constantly rip & tear because they're too tight around those areas, it was sexualisation of a teenage girl & considering it's the same girl several issues of torture port were dedicated to back in 2004 it's really uncomfortable

Got a lot of asks in the same vein, so I thought I’d coalesce all my thoughts in the same place!

As usual, spoilers and discussions of the Robin 80th Anniversary Comic, and Steph’s storyline in particular below the cut!

I didn’t read the emphasis on Steph’s body as inherently sexualizing, although I 100% understand and can sympathize with people who are uncomfortable with it. When I mentioned the fat-shaming from the Batgirl run, I was more bringing it up in the vein that it reminded me of something we don’t see in a lot of books centered around male characters: we are constantly being made aware of Steph’s body, image, and appearance in a way that we’re not about any of the boys. How often does Tim complain about his biceps being too big? Does Jason ever complain about being too tall? One could argue that Tom King tried to do this with Agent 37, but he did it in a way that I’ve never felt comfortable with, personally. But with Steph as a character, we are constantly dealing with comments about her appearance, especially in this comic, conveyed through the art as well as the dialogue.

The fact is that Steph is a character who is frequently sexualized, like most women in comics. When artists are prone to draw women with exagerated proportions, perfect features, and no internal organs, it is very hard to give the benefit of the doubt. Hell, the Robin 80th included a RHATO cover which Kory doing a T&A pose and a weirdly visible ribcage.

As comic fans, we’re left to grapple with this question. Especially with a character like Steph, who has long been a victim of slut shaming both on and off the page, was the subject to extended sexualized torture, was a teenaged mom, and was strongly implied to be a survivor of sexual assault.

Female characters in comics often are forced to have really weird relationships with their body. Cass deals with her own body image in her Batgirl comic when she’s made to feel inadequate because she wears a less sexy costume than Babs did. Steph gets peppered with derogatory comments about her body when she’s Batgirl, courtesy primarily of Damian, simultaneously being called fat while being called flat-chested.

Even if the intention wasn’t to sexualize, which, as I’ve said, comic fans have plenty of reason to be skeptical of, it still is part of an uncomfortable trend throughout comics and the real world, where women are made to feel ashamed of their bodies. Steph is embarrassed to asked for the most basic accommodation, and Bruce and Alfred act confused when Steph acts for a costume that is designed for a body with boobs and hips, not to mention, who’s probably taller than Tim, given the state of the tights and the gap between them and the boots.

Even if the point is just to show how Steph is struggling to “fit in,” that doesn’t make it okay. It’s part of a trend where women are reminded constantly that men are the default, we’re the other. Where finding something as simple as a shirt tailored to fit around a bustline is made out to be a burden on society, where we’re asked to be ashamed of how we deviate from some fictionalized ideal.

And I do find it eyebrow raising that some people are waving away these concerns. Steph’s character has been grossly treated by DC for years, and her treatment during and just after her time as Robin were among the most egregious periods of it. We have been waiting with baited breath for years for a chance to see Steph as Robin again… and we get a page dedicated to how Tim’s costume gives her a wedgie.

Even giving the writers, artists, and editors of this book a hell of a lot of leeway, it’s still in poor taste.  All it really does is serve to remind us that this Robin has boobs, huh? How weird is that, huh? she’s the girl Robin, get it?

Rather than getting to showcase her relationship with Bruce, or what being Robin meant to her, or how it informed her later on as Batgirl (which DC is still pretending never happened: it being left out of her other aliases felt really weird)… the comic shows her being uncomfortable in the role, makes pointed commentary about how she’s different than the boys, and has her be disparaged as not being a real Robin… a fact which, intentionally or not, ends up being reinforced by the rest of the issue, with Tynion leaving Steph out of Tim’s conversations with the other Robins, and with Steph’s entry in the timeline focusing on Tim.

I’m still very glad Steph was included in this comic, but boy howdy, does it seriously prove that we’ve still got a long way to go.

[goose-books]

(original image credit to @/theyshane on unsplash)

a month or so ago the wonderful and very sharp-fanged @yvesdot said i should make a post about the process of Working On A Podcast - what, exactly, does that entail? and so today i set down upon your table a long post about the process of this podcast, its unique struggles, and What Comes Next!

for those of you who are new here: a modern tragedy is my podcast-in-progress, a loose retelling of three of shakespeare’s plays (romeo&juliet, hamlet, and macbeth) set in a modern-day high school. or, alternatively, “so so much drama localized inside a few overlapping friend groups of gay* people”

post under the cut!

tag list (ask me to be added/removed): @piyawrites @harehearts @bisexualorlando @guulabjamuns

*well. gay people and indrajit “macbitch” chopra. never let it be said i don’t have cishet rep 😤

what i mean when i say “podcast”

sometimes when i say, “i’m writing a podcast,” people get the wrong idea - they think i’m going to sit down, maybe with some friends as guest stars, and talk into a microphone for an hour. what i really mean is that i’m writing a fiction podcast - something like an audio drama, if you will.

i’ve had this story concept for a long time (since i realized i was gay, actually. sometime around my coming out i was like “...sapphic romeo and juliet. oh i’m a genius”), but it never really worked as a novel. my inspiration for making it a podcast was the penumbra podcast! which i am not caught up on but which dragged me shirt-collar-first into the world of podcasts. [blowing a kiss to mars] for juno steel.

i will admit that i actually... haven’t listened to a ton of podcasts. mostly because my incredibly helpful attention-deficit brain said listening to things is impossible forever. but let me tell you that starting to write AMT in script format worked immediately. and in hindsight? it makes sense. i mean, i am retelling some of the most famous plays of all time... why not get a little theatrical with it?

the process so far

the podcast is drafted! all 16 episodes of it. all... 176k words of it... only took me a year and a half...

i have my main cast together! AMT has a lot of side characters, not all of whom are cast yet, but my main recurring squad is gathered and i love them all VERY dearly. (also, the population of people i know irl is 75% theater kid. so i think i will be able to figure out the side character thing.)

within the group of voice actors, i also have three assistant directors, a term i use loosely because mostly i just mean… those are my right hand men. the main folks i bounce ideas off of and the main folks i have helping me organize all of this. i’ve said multiple times that i’m just the keyboard monkey and would be hopelessly out of my depth without my beloved assdirectors. (shoutout to @asimpleram, the only one who uses tumblr, you are my best friend and i love you oh so much)

i also have two “bootydirectors” who gave themselves that name and that’s just the people who know the most about recording technology and acting. thanks kings

right now the scripts have been sent out to some sensitivity readers and i am currently editing! (both with regards to sensitivity reader feedback, and also just editing the plot and character arcs in general.) (if you want me to send you AMT and you’re willing to give me your thoughts i will straight-up send it to you honestly just know it’s LONG)

i actually did not consider that writing this might be uniquely hard before i started

fun max tip: if you look too far ahead down the road and realize the breadth of the project you’re taking on you’ll freak yourself out so just dive into things headfirst without checking both ways or considering your actions!!! [i am giving you a double thumbs up from behind my monitor]

i have never written anything like AMT before! it has been an experience! there have been some unique struggles!

working with other people is harder than i expected! which is not about my group, all of whom are lovely people. it is about me and my little OCD rat brain that hates letting go of control. even though... an inherent part of writing a script... is that at some point other people will be involved... wild, i know.

9 main characters! AMT has 9 main characters. this is somewhat excusable because the whole thing is episodic and more like a season of a tv show than a novel. but still. 9 main characters. why did i do that

i’ve never written episodically before, so i’ve had to figure out how to fit the plot into appropriately spaced intervals. there are three running plotlines (one for each play), and they’re all parallel and eventually convergent. so everything’s happening at once and it’s… hard to make episodes that aren’t just “max threw a bunch of scenes together because they were happening at the same time.” (i will admit i’ve defaulted to chronological order when spacing episodes, so the timeline doesn’t get confusing. but i hope each episode is cohesive on its own.)

balancing the tragedy and comedy in tragicomedy has been… interesting. i do to some degree feel like AMT’s gone darker than i initially imagined it; while it’s a high school retelling of these plays (and thus there’s no. there’s no murder. the only person who dies is isaac’s dad and that’s six years precanon), all three plays deal to differing degrees with suicide, among other things, and it felt… disingenuous not to write about that from a modern high schooler’s perspective.

i can guarantee a long-term happy ending for AMT! i cannot guarantee much about what’s in the middle. (there are sixteen episodes; one of my directors likened episode 7 to a five-act play’s third act, when things really start to… hit the fan. he’s right and i’m obsessed with thinking about it that way)

the massive amount of time i have been working on the thing: i started writing this podcast in january 2019. i finished writing it this past summer (2020). that’s two summers that have passed without my recording it (which is obviously easier to organize in the summer… or it was before covid but you get my point). this is… a little disheartening? i don’t know; oftentimes i underestimate how long writing projects will take me. what it comes down to is my urge to put out content vs. my urge to make it perfect…

…especially since i’m technically competing with one william f. shakespeare. (the f is for fucking.) i mean, dear old billy shakes DID write the plot out for me ahead of time, which i appreciate, but still…

AMT is absolutely consumable if you don’t know the first goddamn thing about shakespeare’s works. that said. i assume some of the people who will listen to it are shakespeare enthusiasts, casual or otherwise, and that’s a little terrifying! AMT is a shakespeare retelling, but i’ve made these characters very much my own, and i suppose i worry about how others will approach that, and whether they will disagree with my interpretations, or the way i’ve adapted the plots, and so on and so forth... i just have to live with this one, honestly. i think i could edit AMT for a thousand years and probably still find something to change about it, so i will simply have to get over myself.

that said, i don’t regret the amount of time i’ve spent on it! i think the time i’ve taken to draft and edit these episodes has been well worth the wait; i’m genuinely very happy with what i’ve created, and whether or not you agree with, say, my interpretation of a modern hamlet family dynamic, i hope it’ll still be enjoyable!

so what’s next?

as i said earlier, the scripts are currently in the hands of sensitivity readers, and i’m editing!

over the summer, the cast met on zoom frequently to read through and rehearse scenes. and i will not lie it was the most fucking fun i’ve had this entire wretched interminable year. i am constantly charmed and befuddled by the feeling of Listening To My Words Read Out Loud By A Human Voice and also i love my friends so very much

we have a tentative plan to gather the cast (socially distanced and responsibly, of course) over thanksgiving break to make some actual stabs at recording! i am too afraid to concretely promise AMT Episode 1: Fortune’s Fool by the end of 2020 but like… i’m not NOT promising it! send me your finest vibes. we’re close.

[arecomicsevengood]

Seeds

Before I read it, I had this idea I could write a review of Ann Nocenti and David Aja’s The Seeds for the Comics Journal, but the book just sucked too much. It had basically nothing going for it, or even decipherable as an advancing plot. One thing wrong with it is there’s this sort of conspiracy element, or this “no one believes the news” anymore element of it, but Nocenti didn’t want it to be about “fake news.” Donald Trump has rewired the narrative, so now entire types of subject matter feed into this propaganda machine simply by being addressed. Nocenti’s best work does not shy from topicality, addressing the currents in the cultural air, but this time the modern world feels too hot to handle.

I ordered the Daredevil: Typhoid’s Kiss trade paperback, reprinting a bunch of Nocenti’s work with the Typhoid Mary character from the nineties. The longest story in there is a miniseries with art by John Van Fleet. It’s partly about post-Tarantino video-store employees turned filmmakers kidnapping Typhoid Mary to use her as the subject of a documentary about serial killers and violent media. It’s also about Typhoid Mary working as a private detective trying to track down a killer of prostitutes, who the police don’t care about, and are maybe the actual killers of themselves. Storywise, it’s a pretty cool attempt to address real-world issues of the day within a pulp context.

Van Fleet’s art is pretty boring and bad in a way that’s distinctly ahead of its time. While the miniseries itself probably wouldn’t exist without the precedent of Elektra: Assassin a decade before, (a spinoff about a female Daredevil villain created by the writer during their run on Daredevil where that character defined their run) all the photoreference that’s probably actually just photo backgrounds run through filters sets a precedent for the Alex Maleev/Matt Hollingsworth Daredevil stuff to come a decade later. And it’s frequently annoying on a page design/panel background level. Like in terms of how the panel borders sort of default to grid shapes so there ends up being things that “read” as panels but that don’t actually do anything for pacing. It’s just fitting the narrative into regimented design choices.

This maybe only happens the once. But the art is also just super-stiff throughout, with a very chunky line that eliminates any real nuance. There’s a bunch of characters, but a lot of them are indistinguishable from one another, and that’s because the linework is about as muddy as the color palette — It kinda seems like he’s working with models and photo reference but also doesn’t have that many models to work with so he’s having them play multiple roles, but also his work basically seems more like photoshop filters than actual drawing? There’s a bunch of stuff that I think sucks, basically. But you can also draw a direct line from what Van Fleet is doing in Typhoid to what Aja does in The Seeds. All these choices that are meant to be classy and dignifed, a move away from the excess of superhero comics. The covers of Typhoid are just portraits of the main character, interchangeable from one issue to the next, which was a move that again, was ahead of its time: This is what so many Marvel covers in the 2000s looked like, the Tim Bradstreet Punisher covers probably being the go-to example. It’s pretty dull but it’s nice they’re not super-sexualized.

While the choices arguably suit the subject matter in Typhoid, which is at least partly about movies, in The Seeds, the story doesn’t really make any sense because the visuals seem so steeped in unreality. The premise is that a tabloid has photographed an alien, proving aliens are real. There is really nothing within the context of the story that explains why the news outlet would have enough gravitas to be convincing and have this be an actual news story. And the book is drawn in Photoshop, which is itself a photo-editing software, so the “reality” of the book is defined by the very medium that people recognize as why images can’t be trusted. This contributes a level of irony that could maybe be worked with if the book itself wasn’t so ugly and dull. The whole thing looks like some Banksy bullshit. Outside of word balloons, text appears in the large all-caps typeface of image macros. I don’t have scans of The Seeds because I gave my copy away on account of there not being any reason to keep it around.

The book is beyond dated at the time of its release. Partly this is due to the speed the cultural conversation has been moving for the past five years.  It’s been a difficult time period to work on a work of fiction about the news, certainly, and not only has the comic been a long time in the making, the writer has also been away from making comics for decades now. If the authors had been able to make this as a serialized monthly comic, it might’ve stumbled into timeliness, or the predictive, but as it is, the reading experience feels like a bunch of different, disparate ideas that do not really cohere into a narrative. Leaving aside how the book seems to emerge from a general cultural gestalt of the the 1990s, when The X-Files and Weekly World News were objects of discussion, every major plot point or news story chosen for thematic resonance is approximately fifteen years old. I believe 2005 was when I started to hear about colony collapse disorder. This bee metaphor has been lapped by a Honey Nut Cheerios campaign at this point. (A few years back, boxes of cereal came with seeds of wildflowers you/children could plant.)

Darin Morgan’s episode of The X-Files revival “The Mengele Effect” ably addresses all the issues with how cynicism and conspiracy theories feel different now, all the issues that Nocenti seems terrified of and hopes the audience doesn’t think of when reading her humorless X-Files throwback comic. That episode’s great.  Much of The Seeds seems like it was better done in the decidedly not-great Transmetropolitian. There’s something so dated and sad about this comic’s idea of a cool journalist protagonist: People barely smoke cigarettes anymore! I know no one wants to draw people vaping, but the imagery this book wishes meant “cool, urban, woman” reads as nostalgic affectation in 2021. That so much of the commercial landscapes of our cities has been replaced by vape shops was one of the biggest clues we were already living in a dystopia three years ago.

Nocenti, when she was working regularly, got to be a pretty effective writer for having a monthly deadline wherein she could speak on the issues of the day as they were happening. In the absence of a regular gig, this rare chance to speak her mind gets hampered by how much there is to talk about, and how complicated it all is. If it’s too complicated to address in an ongoing superhero comic, a one-off graphic novel with vaguely commercial ambitions turns out to be a worse space for it. It’s so much sadder than anything in this dream-of-the-nineties comic that the authors were given the grace to make something only under the conditions that doom it to failure. Real people made this work of fiction, and I don’t know what the fuck they’re even talking about, and that’s a more complicated narrative than the journalists in this comic who… stumble upon a story and then need to take to back because it’s too important or something? I don’t understand what this comic is about. It’s clearly gesturing at being about a bunch of different things, but what they get from being in juxtaposition with one another, I don’t know.

In interviews in advance of the release of The Seeds, Nocenti talked about how this was the first time she got to make a comic that didn’t have to have fight scenes or conflict in it. But reading Typhoid it’s clear how conflict ties the story’s disparate threads together. But also while reading Typhoid I kept on thinking about how visually, the Steve Lightle shit that preceded it is so much cooler! Here he is, bifurcating a page so two narrative threads can be told with different approaches to stoytelling:

People sometimes talk about how crazy it is that Nocenti started her Daredevil run immediately following up the Miller/Mazzucchelli Born Again run with a fill-in drawn by Barry Windsor-Smith. But I don’t think anyone has pointed out that, since these Typhoid Mary team-up comics appeared in Marvel Comics Presents, she’s basically following up Barry Windsor-Smith’s Weapon X, and Steve Lightle is totally capable of doing that! Even if these comics are kinda whatever narratively, Nocenti comes up with dense enough narratives to give him shit to do. She’s a good writer within the context of the harsh strictures of early nineties mainstream comics. Which I know seems like a harsh diss! But being a writer that makes work that consistently gives a comics artist something interesting to do is a difficult job that many people are just not interested in doing for various reasons, so it should be recognized when it’s attempted and accomplished.

It’s also interesting that the whole visual approach where both Steve Lightle and Barry Windsor-Smith shine is dependent on flat color. The changes in storytelling made to accommodate the shifts in visual language in full-color mainstream comics didn’t really benefit anyone, and now needs to be outsmarted. In The Seeds, we’ve got this pretty dull reading experience that superficially in its two-color print job and nine-panel grid, looks like it might be influenced by Mazzucchelli’s work in Rubber Blanket and City Of Glass. And we’ve got a black and white Barry Windsor-Smith comic coming out from Fantagraphics in a few weeks that I really hope blows it out of the water.

[notthatiwilleverwriteit]

Your posts are always interesting, this could sound weird but, what do you think about the sexual orientations in 19 days? I know it is shonen ai but in this kind of comic is usually characters are just in love with someone but no anyone else. But with zhanyi it has being shown at least that Zhan had problems thinking about it, what do you think about tianshan's as well? I am not into Lgbt knowledge, so i'm lost about it

Good afternoon, dear anon-san!

I’m sorry it took me a couple of days to get to your question. Thank you for your patience!

I’ve talked about my takes on the sexual orientations a couple of times by now:

Why didn’t HT want MGS to like him more and more?

Homophobia in 19 Days

Could HT be bisexual?

Could ZZX be quoiromantic?

Was ZZX a heterosexual prior to JY’s confession?

Zhanyi and emotional manipulation?

Was MGS HT’s first kiss?

My Tianshan “timeline”

I suggest you check out those previous answers to get a better sense of where I’m coming from. I’m probably going to repeat some of the things in this answer but not as comprehensively.

Also, before I get further into this, I realize this is a rather controversial topic in the fandom. However, I want people reading this to know that I am most certainly not against discussing how readers interpret the characters from this perspective. I know some people just genuinely don’t care one way or another - which is perfectly fine - but to me, it sometimes feels like “who cares” is used to shut people up. I don’t see why the aspect of sexual orientations can’t be discussed just like any other part of the story. Especially since I feel like it’s one of the major themes of 19 Days. And sexual orientations in fiction can be important peaks of representation and connection to many readers, so I do understand why people might want to talk about them.

In all fairness, though, I also understand why people might be annoyed by this discussion. Other’s interpretations can feel forceful to us, especially if they greatly differ from ours. Or it might irritate us if we feel like people are focusing on trivial things. I get it. I’m sometimes “guilty” of those feelings, too - I’m not trying to make it sound like I’m somehow above that. However, I don’t think the solution should be to make others feel shitty but rather to try and give room for all kinds of points of view.

Anyway. End of my usual rant when it comes to these things. (^_^ ‘‘)

“what do you think about the sexual orientations in 19 days?”

When it comes to sexual orientations in 19 Days, I feel like the most accurate answer I can give is “I don’t know”. I don’t think it’s possible to tell one way or another for sure, and anyone’s interpretation is as good as mine. The things I’ve said in previous answers - and what I will continue to say in this one, too - are merely based on the vibes I’ve personally gotten. I am not trying to make it sound like I have some kind of solid, concrete “evidence”. I want everyone to keep all of that in mind when reading this.

He Tian and Mo Guan Shan

I’m going to be fairly brief with HT because I’ve already talked about him in this sense a few times. In short, I tend to read HT as a budding bisexual. Partly because of the vibes I’ve gotten and partly because of my own bias as a bisexual. It’s a pet interpretation of sorts that I like to toy with.

There aren’t any solid extracts of the comic for me to base this on, either. Merely little details that had caught my eye and made me wonder (ch. 160, 190, 226. 307):

If someone says that none of those panels make HT a bisexual, I would wholeheartedly agree. But to me, as a reader, those little details muddy the waters. Reading magazines with half-naked women in suggestive poses on the cover doesn’t make anyone straight, bi, or anything, but it seems HT doesn’t at least mind that kind of content - perhaps he’s even interested in it since he’s supposedly spent money on them. Of course, it’s too hasty to judge a book by its cover so to speak but I’ve always been interested in that detail.

However, what has made me think HT might be bisexual more than that is the whole “I don’t want you to like me more and more” thing. I have somewhat mixed feelings about the note but regardless of that, HT felt the need to lie to MGS. Again, there could be many reasons for it - but I think one possible reason could be that he was conflicted. Initially, HT didn’t get interested in MGS for romantic reasons, but somewhere along the way his feelings shifted and developed. Was HT confused about his own feelings and that’s why he lied to MGS? Was it his first time discovering such feelings for another guy? Again, it’s impossible to tell for sure but I don’t see why that couldn’t be a possible way to interpret it.

In addition to all of that, we don’t really know enough about HT’s past relationships to tell one way or another. He’s only 15, so I doubt he’s had much experience whether it’s with girls or guys. How being a part of his family has affected him as a person is also something that should be taken into consideration when wondering about HT’s potential romantic past.

I haven’t really talked about how I see MGS’s orientation before. I think that MGS’s character was set out as straight, but it’s always been more like a like “default setting” rather than what he might actually be. I would say he sees himself as a heterosexual but I think that’s more about him just going with what’s considered “normal” without bothering to give it much thought (ch. 222):

That little conversation has always reminded me of the movie 40 Year Old Virgin. Like, if Buzzcut had asked MGS “what kind of boobs do you like?” and MGS had been like “yes” or “as long as she has them”. He doesn’t really seem to have preferences or a type when it comes to girls, and I think one reason for that is because he’s never really been that concerned about the matter. If someone asks, he’s into girls but that kind of conversation is over rather quickly with him.

One reason for MGS’s seeming indifference is probably how he’s been rejected by his peers, ultimately leading him to isolate himself and push others away by becoming even harder to approach. Girls wouldn’t be interested in someone like him, so why should he waste time thinking about them? I might be projecting too much but it seems to be like he’s basically rejecting that part of being a teenager. It’s easier to ignore it until you’ve become indifferent than feeling like you’re missing out on something. 

In addition to that, it seems MGS is easily irritated and disgusted by the idea of another guy making a pass at him and aggressively guards both his body and image in that sense (ch. 160, 170, 249, 250, 285):

I’m sure a lot of that has to do with his history of being involved in gangs and being a delinquent. To survive in that world you need to exhibit rather aggressive and masculine behavior. In other words, to be the top dog. In those circles, being gay is easily associated with being the bottom as in submissive and easily overpowered. So, in addition to MGS not being keen on talking about girls and romance, he’s also had to keep up a certain image.

Do I think HT has discovered MGS’s “true” sexuality? I wouldn’t really put it like that. I would rather say HT’s persistent influence has “unlocked” the world of love and affection for MGS. He can experience that part of life with HT instead of rejecting it. I suppose the million-dollar question is does that make MGS straight or homosexual. And to be honest, I don’t have an answer. Personally, I read him more as a heterosexual than homosexual. I can’t really him being in a relationship with other guys than HT.

Jian Yi and Zhan Zheng Xi

I’ve also talked about these two quite a lot, so I don’t know how much I have left to say. Generally speaking, I think JY is someone who might actually identify as a homosexual in the future. It doesn’t look like he’s ever been interested in girls. More importantly, though, it seems that as he’s fallen in love with ZZX he’s also discovered himself in a broader sense (ch. 143, 158, 164, 187):

I think the theme of coming of age when it comes to sexuality is the strongest in JY’s character. ZZX might be the only guy he has a crush on, but JY seems to be thinking about being in love with a guy also as something that might defy him. He feels confused about being different and scared of how others could react to him being in a relationship with ZZX despite how open he also is about his feelings. He might happily want to hold hands with ZZX or kiss him in public but he’s not always that confident. JY is surprisingly good at hiding behind a happy-go-lucky smile and carry the hurt and insecurity caused by prejudice in his heart. Those deeper feelings occasionally burst out when his guard lowers.

Again, this is just an overall vibe I’ve gotten from JY’s character. But I’ve always felt like he’s processing the whole thing of being in love with someone of the same sex on a deeper level than the others. I feel like his feelings for ZZX are connected to his identity more explicitly and him coming to discover himself sexually in the same way that real-life people would.

Compared to the three other boys, I think ZZX has always been a solid straight to me. I think before JY’s confession he identified as a heterosexual. He just was the kind of teenage boy who found girls and crushes too troublesome and annoying (ch. 51, 52, 102):

I doubt the idea of being in a relationship with another guy had really popped into his mind as an option. JY’s confession and feelings for him as a guy came as a big shock to him. Their first kiss seemed to tumble everything down in ZZX’s head and force him to figure everything - JY, himself, and his relationship with JY - from the beginning (ch. 151, 152, 165):

I believe a lot of it was rebuilt the same way but there were definitely changes and also room for future changes. A lot of the feelings ZZX already had for JY - protectiveness, affection, deep sense of bond - could also be applied to a romantic relationship. I believe they’re also the building blocks that ZZX as a character would want to cherish in his romantic relationship. All ZZX needed to do was to shift his point of view a little when it came to JY and see how he felt about it.

As big of a mental turmoil as I’m sure ZZX went through, I think it’s safe for us to assume what his resolve was. I might be too generous with my interpretation but this moment made Zhanyi canon in my head (ch. 209):

ZZX didn’t exactly return JY’s feelings in the same sense but he accepted them. He might not be ready to give all the things JY wants yet but he made a promise that JY will have a future with him. JY won’t have to feel insecure because ZZX will always be beside him. He just needs more time, and JY has to be patient.

But I suppose that once again the question of ZZX’s current orientation remains. And I don’t have a solid answer this time, either. I still read him mostly as a heterosexual, though. Just like MGS, I can’t really see ZZX in a relationship with another guy besides JY. However, I think that ZZX is also the type of character who puts more emphasis on the bond of the relationship rather than his partner’s gender. But...still, I imagine it would be quite a hump for him to discover that he could have feelings for guys in general, too.

“in this kind of comic is usually characters are just in love with someone but no anyone else”

This is very true and also partly why saying anything one way or another is quite difficult. In the story, the characters are in love with one other person, but you can’t make assumptions or conclusions based on just that. Just because you’re in a same-sex relationship doesn’t mean you’re a homosexual. Whenever I wonder about the orientations in 19 Days, I try to keep this in mind but I also feel like the vagueness allows readers to make multiple interpretations. I get certain vibes that point me in certain directions but I completely understand if others end up with other kinds of readings.

However, this kind of “he’s only gay for him” is also something I’ve seen BL been criticized for. It makes it look like men being attracted to other men isn’t a real thing but rather something that happens under special circumstances. Personally, I don’t have a major problem with that - it is what it is, I suppose - but I can see why that would bother people in BL. Do I wish some characters (for example, JY) would come out as LGBT at some point in the story (if you don’t think he already has)? Sure, I’d be interested in seeing that. And I think it would be a natural development for his character. Do I think that’s going to happen? I’m somehow doubtful, not at least in so many words. But that doesn’t really mean the comic can’t tell a story about discovering oneself, as we’ve already come to see.

Thank you for your question, dear anon-san!

[theangrypokemaniac]

I'll state from the beginning that the images below display the sort of sweet synchronicity to which only love can give life:

MaAndPaShipping is the best ship, and here are five reasons why:

1. It Made James

Like the boy do yer? Ever felt the slightest tingle of warmth at the mention of his name?

Well get down on yer knees and give thanks to his mother and father for gifting him to the world!

Where would we be without their remarkable commitment? Could James have grown into the dandified dream boat of your desires if deprived of the safety provided by his parents?

Had they not brought him up, he'd be dead, The Dog of Flanders fantasy made reality. If miraculously he survived, foraging in the wild is not conducive to a foppish personality.

Is that to yer fancy? No? Then let's have a little respect. The luxury Ma and Pa gave enabled his macaroni tendencies to reach such heights.

Their love created him! How can it not be celebrated?

You lot would ship Jessie's parents but you can't, because she has no dad, and I don't suppose you'll ever assent to his obvious identity of Windy Miller, although 'Jessie Miller' has a wonderful ring to it, so what can be done?

Should a Pa Jess be conjured for the purpose, he still buggered off, didn't he? Where's the allure in a faithless git?

I can't comprehend the obsession with Ma Jess. As soon as here she's stiff, and what is there to remember but coercing her daughter into eating snow?

Hey, I named her. What more do you want from me?

I'd rather have the living, visible ancestors, if you don't mind.

Yeah, says the history fanatic.

Why not make the most of the chances offered, and follow a devoted couple whose love made a difference to your existence?

2. Canon!

There are many ships which I find repulsive for involving depravity, or absurd as the subjects haven't met, or don't inhabit the same fictional universe.

Video et taceo: I see and I say nothing.

Neither does anyone. Forcing decent folk in to incest, bestiality etc. is quite alright.

Perverted ideas are left alone, but woe betide a Rocketshipper, because that's offensive.

It may be the only original ship left standing, with proper evidence and sanctioned by Nintendo, but no, it's fair game for undermining. People pick at your arguments, quibble constantly and NEED to register their objections NOW. You MUST be made aware of opposition. You're not to be permitted your views the way those with twisted tastes are indulged.

Why, out of tens of thousands of combinations, does making Jessie and James an item provoke hostility?

The strength of negativity actually serves as validation, for why be so concerned if it's an impossible relationship?

However sick they are, I'm not anti any ship. I can't muster sufficient interest to do it, and if I scroll on, I forget. I certainly don't attack those responsible.

Anti-Shipping is inherently nihilistic for promoting loneliness. They aren't against Rocketshipping through wanting Jessie and James to be with someone else, as an alternative is not readily available, so the outcome of it is neither finding a companion.

MaAndPaShipping attracts no sourpuss silliness, for 'tis canon beyond question. There's nothing about being 'just friends' when married with a son.

How's the state of your O.T.P.? Not looking too clever I expect, and what's your contribution: wishing, and hoping, and thinking, and praying?

Cast it off! None of that longing is necessary in these quarters, as MaAndPaShipping is a fait accompli.

Hallelujah! Wallow in that Love!

Don't you yearn for at least one ship that all of us accept by default, to the extent these aristocrats are spoken of as a single unit?

Across the internet, Ma and Pa are bracketed as 'James's parents', never 'he' and 'she', always 'they', barely counting as distinct characters. That's how undeniable the love is between them. Sheer indifference has awarded it a blessing from everyone.

MWAH-HA-HA-HA-HA!!!

Of course, now I've drawn attention to it the moaning will start, but we all know a spoilsport when we see one.

If they had any legitimate complaints they ought to have mentioned 'em before this piece highlighted the marriage!

Except it won't have occurred to 'em previously, proving the eternal, indissoluble quality of MaAndPaShipping.

You get good value with this one.

Find a post referring to Ma and Pa as individuals and I'll have written it, for that's what you call ironic.

3. It's a Fine Rocketshipping Proxy

I was at primary school when Pokémon hit the West like the bright, bearded meteor it is, atomizing all competition for a child's attention.

I have shipped Jessie and James before I knew anyone else did it, unaware shipping was even a thing.

There are other pairs where I think: 'That seems to fit', but it's incomparable to what I feel for them.

It is part of me. I bleed it.

I have shipped it longer than most Tumblerries have dwelt upon the earth.

I used to believe, what with the hints and manga finale, that this resolution was  inevitable, and all I had to do was wait.

Well I've been patient for two decades now, thus when I look at the modern incarnation, and realise it's no nearer to that goal, and instead is further away, waiting starts to wear a bit thin.

I resent the lack of appreciation shown to the fans by the cretins in charge, how any meagre shippy inclusion is done not with an interest in deepening bonds, but with the blatant cynicism of moulding us into performing monkeys dancing to their manipulative tune.

I dislike being treated like a sea lion, expected to clap me flippers at the wave of a fish, or as a panting dog begging at top table, where, because they're desperate to maintain the status quo, every scrap flung down from above now comes with an Anti-Ship kick in the teeth, just to be sure nothing progresses. Not whilst the franchise can still be milked for all it's worth.

I have lost faith Rocketshipping will happen. What passes for Pokémon today carries not the remotest indication of any intention on the so-called writers' part to finish it that way.

Even if it did, it's not my Team Rocket, it's those skeletal, gargoyle bastardisations. My Jessie and James never got the reward they deserved.

I'm somewhat in the market for a replacement. Beneath this loathsome carapace of acid and ice beats the tender heart of a true romantic, and it must have an outlet!

Shipping Ma and Pa provides a certain spurious relief, because it's as close as you can get to Jessie and James without it being them, both biologically as his parents, but they're so similar to the duo it counts as proof in itself.

Holy Matrimony! is prime Rocketshipping territory, not merely the balloon lift, but many slight additions are as important, like the haircuts matching.

Ma and Pa are therefore Jessie and James in the past, present and future:

The past for representing Jess 'n' Jamie gone Victorian, and we've all wondered how that'd turn out.

The present as it's there right now, absent of suffering the shameless whims of morons to get what you want. 'Tis yours to savour.

The future as a glimpse of Jessie and James once married with children, and they agree:

That's how they play it given the opportunity!

What, James in blue, for his and Pa's hair, and Jessie wearing purple, like Ma's, with a red shawl for her own, and Ma Jess's orange earrings to copy the beads?

• Money!

• Bun!

• 'Tache!

• Classy pad!

• Fancy gear!

• Pampered pet!

• Identical cups of Earl Grey!

4. Original Blend

Ma and Pa have only got two fans! We care more than the entire fandom has in twenty years!

Rocketshipping art is ten a penny, so why not display a pioneering spirit, sharpen up those pencils and be inspired?

Let your mind expand and marvel at the possibilities of these unchartered territories, and I'll reblog it if it's nice.

Pay attention to the condition of it being nice. I'm not putting up with any old toss.

Real Ma and Pa is what I want too, not those Sinnoh coffin-dodgers.

It's never been done! Every drawing breaks new ground!

I don't like fan fiction, but I wouldn't say 'no' to that either. Recall the 'nice' stipulation again.

Come on, be the first amongst your friends and get ship shape!

5. It Gives Us All Hope

Suppose your favourite amour one day became canon: you imagine that's the end of the matter?

Well it ain't.

Between Ash, Misty, Brock, Jessie, James, Gary and Tracey, there are three-and-a-half out of fourteen parents (Flint doesn't count as a complete man) and one out of twenty-eight grandparents, and that's not enough!

If the series drew to a close with your beloved couple apparently walking into the happily-ever-after, there's no guarantee it'll endure. In fact, the odds are they'll split up within a few years and leave another generation to fend for themselves or starve.

That's right, so don't presume the final episode is all you need to worry about. Can you rest easy knowing it'll go pear-shaped once the camera stops rolling?

It's futile soothing one's worries with:

Oh, but they know what it's like to be alone. They'd never inflict such stress on their children.

Oh really?

Look at that poor showing of grandparents. Either Pokémon has a system reminiscent of the sci-fi film Logan's Run, where everyone over thirty is vapourized, or these disappearing maters and paters were themselves victims of abandonment.

I bet when they settled down, they thought it'd be different for their kids, they'd make sure of it, but no, off they went down that same route of feckless self-indulgence, and that's being kind assuming they intended not to repeat history.

Depressing eh? What's the good in any of us surrendering to romance, real or otherwise, if love is but a mayfly of emotion, and all dreams are doomed to die?

Then Ma and Pa arrive, and suddenly the storm clouds part for a ray of heavenly light.

It's not only that they made the effort in what was probably an arranged marriage and have stayed together from youth, it's that they've stayed together when no one else has, which augments its value.

When separation is commonplace, sticking it out becomes rarer and rarer as any belief in the sanctity of wedlock erodes with every failure.

If they didn't bother, why should I? What's the use when it won't work?

Once that idea enters your head, it's over, and your gloom-laden attitude fulfils itself.

Society is collapsing about Ma and Pa's ears, but they persevere nevertheless, refusing to buckle under the turgid malaise engulfing the arrogant and weak.

It's bloody beautiful, man!

You may suggest an environment of supreme wealth erases normality, and to their class and time period divorce is still taboo, so they don't really have much of choice but to remain wedded.

Ah, but it's not as if they simply tolerate one another for appearances, or carried on for the sake of their son (which is more than anyone else did besides), not when he walked out on them.

They've been married longer than James has lived, so at least eighteen years (don't all squeal at once), and they're still blissfully contented!

They hold hands!

They use terms of endearment like 'dear' and 'my precious'!

They were made for one another!

They work as a team!

They want the same thing for James!

It could bring a stone angel to tears it's so beautiful!

See what success can be achieved when you try? When you endeavour to love the one you're with and make yourself worth loving in return?

Better that than chucking 'em at the first sign of trouble.

Ma and Pa is such an irrevocable union even the despair of losing their only child failed to tear 'em asunder, and that'd defeat many, but not this husband and wife.

Be grateful, for it means all is not in vain.

It doesn't have to be misery and pain: love can last despite the pressure of a wretched, hollow culture bent on self-destruction. Your ship might just succeed too.

God bless 'em for keeping the magic alive!

...

Why do I have the presentiment that I'm going to regret encouraging support?

[mathicsmagic]

Basic Astrology info 🌙 { Things that you need to know before reading my character Analysis }

I tried my best to bring you from 0% to about 80% in Astrology. the other 20% is practicing ^^ which you can learn in my character analysis or by yourself.

Do you just know your sun ☀️ sign? are you new to astrology? then this post is for you! here, I will teach you some basic things about Astrology. so you can understand and enjoy 💡 my other posts ( ´･ω･)人(・ω・｀ ) especially my { character analysis } please don't forget these are just little parts. I will tell you more in my { character analysis } when making them a birth chart.

Before starting, I would like to ask you { watch this 2 min video }. it will give you a nice start about what's going on in the sky. don't try to understand anything . just watch and enjoy the music. you know it's not a good method to just start talking about something new. { not for everything of course } we should give people time. even if it's just a little bit . to be alone with that subject. to get the possibility, look at it and get to know it alone. as a stranger that we don't know.

and after a while, we won't still have much information about it BUT our new friend is not a stranger anymore . and when a teacher comes, and give us answers, they will make a lot more sense! because we have questions inside our own minds! and that's very important. learning without these little moments is not effective at all. like a bad programmed robot, that when you show it an image from a male Blonde anime character with blue eyes, its only answer would be: "NARUTO? " NO! don't be a robot!

For this guide, I decided to explain topics that are not mentioned in most astrology lessons. the parts that we always used by default without explanation. I didn't cover things that you can search for and find easily. 

so let's get started ^^ I hope you like to read!

Last Update 2/29/2020

What is Astrology? Astrology is the study of the movements and relative positions of { several things in the sky }, from our point of view on earth.

Q1.what things? A1. these : { Planets + Zodiac Signs  }

Planets: {Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto, Sun, Moon + some other Objects + some mathematical points }

Zodiac Signs { signs and NOT Constellation. it's very important. I will talk about it more }

Note 1 { Sun + Moon + some other Objects } aren't planets . we all know that. BUT as a moving thing in the sky, they are in the group of planets.

Note 2 It's very important that Astrology is from our point of view from earth. { it a 2D thing } and NOT what actually happens in the space. wouldn't it make it wrong? No. I will tell you why. wait a bit, please.

Q2. By studying those things, what will we find out? A2. The two important ones are these : { what kind of character we got at the moment we were born } { How the sky effect our < Birth Moment Character > at every single second }

Q3. What does it mean? < our Birth Moment Character > A3. Imagine this: Planets are moving in the sky and throwing colors { their energy }. someone is born and his/her soul will be painting in those colors! her/his hand will become red by mars, a gold head by sun and so on. another person is born a week later. her/his hand will get gold. because the sun's position has changed ! and this colored soul, will be your character. how you get angry. why. how you would show your emotions and so on.

Q4. So, that's the reason why they are so many people that have my Sun sign, but they are so different. because the planets position change and we have a different sky map. A4. Yes, ^^ you had different sky maps < Birhcharth > when you were born.

Note In astrology, we call that sky map { your birth moment character } birth chart ! its a chart that will show each planet position at the time you were born. I want to make a birth chart for fictional characters :3

Q5.But I have a friend and she/he has a twin. and they are totally different. their sky should be quite similar ! then why are they so different? A5. If you have that question, Congratulations ! you will become a very good astrologer ! you are a person that cares about details and it's very important for learning and using astrology. you know my dear friend, you can even find a person, that was born in the exact second as you { which means you both have the exact sky map } BUT be totally different!

Q6. Really why? Q7. because you will { 100% } have different, childhood and totally different experiences from your lives. it's not only your chart < birth moment character > that will effect you. you { your experiences from your live } will effect your chart too. and that's the most amazing part of astrology ! which I will teach you in my fictional character analysis.

So the boring part is done! let's start talking about birth chart ! and those things that I said I will answer later!

What are Zodiac Signs? before this, we should start with the definition of constellations. Long ago when we looked at the sky, there were some stars that :

Their distance from each other did not change

They made groups. and each group had a shape

we put names on every single group. these names came from how they looked. for example, The Great Bear Or Ursa Major looks like a bear. these groups of stars are constellations!

They are 12 constellations that we use their NAMES in astrology.  { From Aries The Ram to Pisces The Fish }.

we call these 12 constellations, Zodiacs. Zodiac is an Ancient Greek word and it means The Circle Of Animals. { some of them aren't animals but still XD }

At this point, you may have these Questions:

Q1.What? we use only their names? Q2.Why are they 12? Q3.Why are only these particular constellations in the group of Zodiacs?

If we see the whole sky with all its constellations as a map, these map's position change Overtime! In spring, some constellations are in the west. but when summer comes they are in the north! for example. the whole map does not change. it somehow rotates!

Something was always the same. Through what we know as a year { From the First day of Spring to the last day of Winter } something interesting happened to the Sun.

it always passes through one path. in this specific path, they are only 12 constellations! { you can see it in this video }

As you can see, there are 2 lines in this video. A green one and a red one. The Green one shows the sun's path. { we see it from earth } through what we call a year. The red one shows Earth's movement. and where the 4 seasons start. Again, through what we call a year.

Q4.  What are the seasons? A4. We have them because of the tilt of the Earth's axis. The tilt of the Earth means the Earth will lean towards the Sun (Hot Summer) or lean away from the Sun (Cold Winter) 6 months later. In between these, Spring and Autumn will occur. The Earth's movement around the sun causes the seasons. You can read more about the seasons HERE.

Q5. Did we EXACTLY know when was the starting day of each season? A5. Yes. you can see how we measured them:

So let's continue ^^ Just for reminding, I didn't forget the questions I didn't answer yet. don't worry!

2 factors from the { first video } showed us how time was moving. The red line represents the seasons. We could see and feel how the weather was changing. and the green line which was the view of the sky. and we could see how the stars and constellations changed at those 4 seasons.

Let's go back to the last picture again. It says:

At the starting days of the second 30/31 days of summer, if we followed the sun's path through that green line, we would see the sun in The Lion constellation.

NOTE In the Calendar we use today, we call these 31 days { the second 30/31 days of summer } 23 JULY - 22 AUGUST. In astrology, we call the second astrological month of summer, The Leo Season.

Q6. How did we get to this point? ََA6. Please keep in mind that I made this guide as a simple explanation for how Astrology's system works. I didn't explain our journey through how we made our calendar system or why we kept our current system. Well, ^^ now that this’s clear, let's continue with the answer ^u^

4000 years ago, our ancestors found something interesting. At the starting point of the first 30/31 days of Spring, they ALWAYS saw THE RAM { ARIES } constellation in a particular part of the sky. and it was always. Every year.

At the starting point of the second 30/31 days of spring, they ALWAYS saw THE BULL { TAURUS } constellation in a particular part of the sky.

At the starting point of the 3rd 30/31 days of spring, they ALWAYS saw THE TWINS { GEMINI } constellation in a particular part of the sky.

So they made these laws:

When we see THE RAM constellation has arrived, it means, the next 30/31 days, are the first 30/31 days of spring.

When we see THE BULL constellation has arrived, it means, the next 30/31 days, are the second 30/31 days of spring.

When we see THE TWINS constellation arrived, it means, the next 30/31 days, are the 3rd 30/31 days of spring.

And so on. for all 4 seasons , they could make 3 laws! In General, these laws mean this:

The Ram constellation was a sign that the next 30/31 days, are the first 30/31 days of spring.

The BULL constellation was a sign that the next 30/31 days, are the second 30/31 days of spring.

The TWINS  constellation was a sign that the next 30/31 days, are the 3rd 30/31 days of spring.

With these laws, we make each season to 3 parts. We have 4 seasons so we get 12 parts. each part was around 29/31 days, and had a constellation as a sign!

So with this information, we can make a new map.

The inner circle: the 4 seasons. It will have 12 parts. They are the astrological months. They will be different from July and August. They will start with the seasons.

Point A: The First day of Spring { Vernal Equinox }

The white lines in the season circle: The starting day of each 30 days { astrological month } we will have 12 groups. and each of them will have 30/31 days.

The Green circle: The Sun’s path Here are the 12 constellations that are in the sun’s path.

The Black lines in the green circle: the day that we could see a certain constellation, in a particular part of the sky.

As you can see the constellations are not equal in length. Some of them are large like Pisces The Fish.and some of them are very small Like Aries The Ram. but it wouldn't cause us any problems. because we don't use the length { the whole days } that a constellation is visible in the sky. 

we only use the first day that we can see it. we see a constellation in a certain time and place, and then we could tell the next 30 days, will belong to which group.like this: look !! The Bull constellation is here { here = time and place } again! Then the next 30 days are the second 30 days of spring.

These constellations are acting as a sign { guide } for us. that we can recognize the start of each astrological month. { don't forget that the constellations shouldn't exactly appear on the first day of each month. }

Q7. You said we only use their names, but this doesn't make sense. When we put these 2 circles together, we will see that each astrological month, is bound to one constellation. So it's really the constellation and not just its name!

A7. the short answer is this: its because the seasons happen always in the same place. { the seasons circle doesn't move } but the constellations circle will move { from our point of view } so they aren't bound together! 

The last image is our view from 4000 years ago. Let’s go to 700 years later. our view from the sky changed Like this:

Before starting with the long answer, I should tell you something. As you see in the last picture, on the first day of spring { Point A } the body of Aries THE RAM constellation was visible at the sky.

That's very important. around 4000 years ago, these 2 points were one and the same. { the 1st day of spring and when they saw Aries THE RAM constellation } And that's the time when I said our ancestors found those laws for the seasons.

But from our point of view, the constellations circle moves. Around the past 4000 years, As time passed, on the first day of spring, they didn't see the body of Aries THE RAM constellation. The point started to move from ARIES THE RAM to PISCES THE FISH. like this:

This happens because of how the Earth moves. { the Earth’s wobbling axis } You can see it in this video:

NOTE  The Aries [♈] Symbol in this video, is re-parenting the first day of spring { it was the A Point in our map } you can see how our view of sky changes as time passes.

It keeps moving, until 2000 years ago. At that time, on the first day of spring, there was the starting point of Pisces constellation. And not ARIES. And now, 2000 years after that, on the first day of spring, there is the Aquarius constellation that we see in the sky.

Do you get the point? Around 4000 years ago, Aries constellation was the sign that spring is here { its first 30 days } but now { 4000 years after } the Aquarius constellation is doing this.

Note In Astrology, we give meaning to signs and planets. Like we say Gemini sign,  rules communication. How we make our thoughts to words. How we talk. { Which we can't prove XD people say they lost the original resources and books for these meanings. Even If it's true we can't prove anything } 

When we say Gemini in Astrology, we don't mean its constellation. Not now and not 4000 years ago. we mean a time in our yearly Calendar. The 3rd 30 days of spring. Which 4000 years ago, Gemini THE TWINS constellation, was its sign of arrival! 4000 years ago, when astrology was born, This constellation was the guide that the 3rd 30 days of spring is here! But now, 4000 years after, this constellation is not the guide.

Q8. Wouldn't it make Astrology wrong? A9. No. Because the meaning we give to Gemini is not for the constellation. It's for those 30 days! The 3rd 30 days of spring!

Note A Calendar answers this : When is now. it is related to time. What is time for us? Our seasons. The movement of Earth around the Sun. So the question when, and the term of time is bound to the question WHERE and the term of movement and place. We have spring when the Earth is in a certain place and has a specific distance from the sun. And it goes for other seasons too. Now we can add another thing to the calendar. It's related to a Place. Where is Earth right now. { from the sun } its a combination of WHEN AND WHERE.

So those 30 days, that carries the Gemini meaning, aren't just made of time because they are days. They are made of a place around the sun. So Gemini sign { the 3rd 30 days of spring } it's not just made of time. It's placed in the sky.

So with this, we can make the space around the sun, in 12 equal parts.

And each part will be those 30 days. astrological moths. So they will be 30 degrees.

360 degrees ÷ 12 = 30 degrees  30 degrees = 31-30-29 days   A circle is 360 degrees.

These 12 parts are those parts that carry the astrological meanings and not the constellations. The meaning is connected to every 30 days. And therefore to a place in the sky around the sun.

4000 years ago, we needed a guide to recognize when every 30 days was here. But now we don't. We keep using the name of a constellation, that 4000 years ago were bound to every 30 days. We call the first 30 days of spring Aries, because of 4000 years ago. It’s just a name.

now, we use the names of the constellations to addressing an astrological month. you can see that the constellations are no longer there. but we use their name. { I used their symbols here } 

I hope I could make it clear ^^ that was the difference between signs and constellations. thank you so much for reading all of it ^u^

So when we say My sun sign is Gemini it means:

At the moment I was born, my sun was in one of those 12 equal parts around the Earth, that 4000 years ago, The Gemini constellation was its sign. My sun was there. In the 3rd part of those 12.

So we answered these questions:

Q1.What? we use only their names? Q2.Why are they 12? Q3.Why are only these particular constellations in the group of Zodiacs?

You can have a new Question ^^:

Q.why did they make the astrological months equal in size? Why didn't they make their size exactly like the constellations?

A.you know, it's because they had an understanding about the seasons AND then looked at the stars and found those laws.

The first day of spring { Vernal Equinox} The first day of summer { Summer Solstice} The first day of Autumn { Autumnal Equinox } The first day of winter { Winter Solstice}

There were 4 fix points. The starting of each season. They want to keep these 4 points. 

They saw only 3 constellations between the start and endpoint of each season.like the last image. { I say 3 because I talk about the whole length of a constellation }

So they had to make each season 3 parts. And they had to make them equal to keep those 4 points.

And because of these 2 things { keeping those 4 points ~ there were almost 3 constellations in each season } they didn't have any other choice.  They have to make them equal. If not, the would lose those 4 points as fixed points.

There is a constellation after Scorpio. above it. before Sagittarius. its name is Ophiuchus. People say it's the 13th sign. Which is wrong. so let’s find out why ^^

If you are a SatrrySky fan { Otome Game | Anime } you should be familiar with It. Ophiuchus looks like a man grasping a snake.

Let’s go back 4000 years ago and try to make Ophiuchus a guide { sign } for some days in the year.

Ophiuchus can't be a sign because: Through what we call a year, the sun doesn't pass over it! After Scorpio, the sun will directly go to Sagittarius constellation. Sun won't go there to Ophiuchus. We made this system from the sun's movement. If the sun doesn't pass it, it's not in our system. you can see it in the picture.

The constellations job was to be a guide { sign } for us. 4000 years ago, all 365 days of the year had their own guide without Ophiuchus. even If some day Ophiuchus would become a part of the zodiac circle { which means we would be able to see the sun travel through it } it wouldn't become a sign! since the year won't become more than 365 days. so there are no extra days for Ophiuchus to be a guide { sign } for them.

So Ophiuchus is not a sign. the end XD

even if Ophiuchus could become a sign, it would become the 9th sign { after Scorpio } and not 13th. Pisces would become the 13th sign.

{ you know I'm asking myself that would anybody keep reading this XD ? }

at the beginning we talked about Birth-Charts:

In astrology, we call that sky map { your birth moment character } birth chart ! its a chart that will show each planet position at the time you were born. I want to make a birth chart for fictional characters :3

Please watch this Short video. { visual is always better for understanding ^^ }

NOTE In This video you will see that the teacher is talking about the term { Predominant  Constellations } and that is what I tried to tell you in the last parts ^^ 

So now that we have an understanding of what exactly is a Birth-chart, we should go ahead and know its components. which are:

The 12 signs meanings

The Planets meanings

The 12 Houses and their meaning

I prefer to start with the houses. because they can be a little confusing. the big question about them is why they exist? why we have another ring there, with 12 equal parts { like the signs } but they have numbers as names? I will answer all of them ^^

First of all, let's watch this short video and see how the houses look:

welcome back ^^

I know you may get more confused XD but don't worry! now that you watched this video, you are ready for the main explanation. before the main explanation about why the house system exists, I would like to talk about something else. 

you know we have a term in astrology called Ruler-ship. they say:

Sun is the Ruler of Leo

Mercury Rules both Gemini and Virgo

Mars Rules both Aries and Scorpio { Scorpio in antic astrology }

Scorpio has 2 Rules, Mars and Pluto

Ruler-Ship is a kind of relation. let’s talk about Mercury and its relation with Gemini and Virgo { Very Simple and short } Mercury is:

Our mind

It Rules both Gemini and Virgo

Gemini is how we talk { put our thoughts to words }

Virgo is analyzing things that already exist.

their relation makes sense right?

and now BOOM! the house system will come in XD we will get another circle with 12 equal parts { like the signs }, they have numbers as names and, Their Ruler is a sign!

It even gets worse XD it’s ok let’s go on. every house will have a sign as a ruler. like the 3rd house is ruled by Gemini, the 3rd sign.

so we could get these Ruler-Ship groups:

#1 { Mars | Aries + 1st House }

#2 { Venus | Taurus + 2nd House }

#3 { Mercury | Gemini + 3rd House }

#4 { Moon | Cancer + 4th House }

#5 { Sun | Leo + 5th House }

#6 { Mercury | Virgo + 6th House }

#7 { Venus | Libra+ 7th House }

#8 { Pluto + Mars   | Scorpio  + 8th House }

#9 { Jupiter | Sagittarius + 9th House }

#10 { Saturn | Capricorn + 10th House }

#11 { Uranus |  Aquarius + 11 House }

#12 { Neptune |  Pisces+ 12 House }

let’s go back to Mercury again. mind, talking and analyzing. the planet has the main meaning and the sign { here are 2 }  is Its subset. It is related to it.

when we start to put the 3rd house here, we start to see the problem. the 3rd house meaning is VERY similar to the Gemini sign. their similarity is a lot more than Mercury and Gemini. like they are the same thing and we are forcing ourselves to see and use them as 2 different terms.

the same goes for all the houses and their Ruler signs. 

let’s talk about Libra: In one simple word, Libra would be: { Others }

Its opposite sign Aries: In one simple word, Aries would be: { Self } Self: How we differentiate ourselves from others { as you can see we can see Libra’s meaning, [ which is the opposite sign ] here. not any self. the self that we differentiate ourselves from others }

The 7th house is Relationship. { romantic or not }

do you see their similarity? we can have relationships with others.this is the point that they start to look like the same thing.

we have 2 circles with 12 equal parts { Signs and Houses } because the Earth has 2 movements. 

One around the sun that will make the Sign circle

One around its self that will make the House circle

let’s ignore that earth has the 2nd movement. try to imagine that earth is a cube and its only movement is to orbit around the sun.

as the cube travels around the sun, its whole body will pass through the signs. it will take one astrological month { around 30 days } for the cube, to go from a sign to the next one.

360 degrees  ÷ 12 signs  = 30 degrees 30 degrees is around 31-30-29 days

now let's add the 2nd movement to our cube. if we do this, at every single moment, our cube will face a sign, that is different from the sign that its whole body is in it. it will take 2 hours for the cube, to go from a sign to the next one.

24 hours  ÷ 12 signs  = 2 hours

because the earth moves around itself, in every 24 hours, we will face each sign. for about 2 hours. it will take a whole day to face all the 12 signs. and because of this, we have a house circle. that shows us when we are facings a sign in every 24 hours.

the sign circle will move slowly. every 30 days. but the house circle is fast. it moves every 2 hours.

the 1st house is basically Aries. the 2nd house is basically Taurus. [ .... ] the 12th house is basically Pisces.

I recommend watching  the last video again ^^ I think you will be less confused this time ^u^

The inner purple circle: The Signs circle { with white signs } The outer orange circle: The Houses circle { with black signs + numbers } The blue cube: The earth The Yellow circle: The sun

As you can see, the sun is at the beginning of Taurus season. which means that we are in May { like around 9th may }. the 1st house is in Aries. at this time of the year, the 1st house is in Aries around 02:52 AM. let’s see what will happen 2 hours later:

As you can see around 05:22 AM, while the earth orbits around itself, it will face other signs. our view from the 1st house will change. don’t forget that the earths place in the sky is still the same. { the sun is in Taurus } the sun’s position re-present the movement of earth around the sun.

NOTE It’s always the House circle that moves. in some birth-chart designs, its like that the sign circle is moving. but it’s not ^^ they do it for a better look! let’s give our last chart a better look:

As you can see I just rotate it. the chart is still the same as before. its 1st house and everything are the same.

NOTE for some reason { which I will tell } we rotate a birth-chart, until its 1st house land 100% on the left. then this will automatically happen :

Its 7th house will land on the right. Its 4th house will  land on the most bottom part. And Its 10th house will land on the top.

Q.why?

A.The 4th house is basically cancer sign right? so Cancer will rule it. the ruler of cancer is the Moon. and Moon is our Emotions and feelings. so the 4th house is also Ruled by The Moon. the 4th house is representing the most hidden and deepest part of our character. So for better visual understanding, we put the 4th house on the bottom of the chart. it’s the deepest place. so it should look like one. The 4th house is representing our private life.

A. Its opposite House, the 10th house is representing our outdoor life. so it's the most visible part of our character. everyone can easily see it. so it will go on the top. automatically.

for better understand we should have this point of view:

It makes sense right? from this view the 4th house is on the bottom and the 10th house is on the top.

The first 6 houses are more hidden than the next 6. let’s suppose the first six are under water.

I will have Birth-chart commission soon ^^ { just the design }

The blue part { sky } inside the chart is the house system. you can see the numbers. the first house has a mask with the Aries symbol. the 7th house has a mirror with a Libra symbol. the 4th house has a heart-shaped moon and cancer sign in its sky and the 10th house has Capricorn symbol on its door.

The middle part is for the signs and planets. and a bunch of other things. the complete description will come soon ^^

astrology is the art of combining these meanings. you can find lots of resources about these meanings. you can find lots of videos, more than 1 hour that people are talking about a single sign.

you can learn a lot about each one. but if you are not able to combine them, it would be useless. so for better understand, let's begin with the Elements.

The elements are like the skeleton of the signs meanings. it's very important to understand them well. each element will have a group of signs:

Fire: [ Aries Leo  Sagittarius ]

Earth [ Capricorn Taurus Virgo ]

Air [ Libra  Aquarius Gemini ]

Water [ Cancer Scorpio Pisces ]

These 4 elements have their own meanings in astrology.

Fire is the Spirit

Earth is the Reality

Air is the Mind

Water is Emotions

so let’s find out what they really mean. I will continue with an example. there are moments in our daily life like these:

we want to draw a picture

change our profile picture

buy an outfit for an important meeting

they are times that we exactly know what we want. like we have a Clear image from what we want inside our head. and they are times that we are lost. we know what we want. but inside our head is completely empty. let’s take a look at this:

let assume that the 1st image is not a real dog. it’s our imagination from the perfect dog we want to draw.

The 1st image is Fire. the Spirit. our imagination is a a complete thing inside our head. it's alive. it just needs to come out.

The 3rd image is Earth. the Reality. it’s what we draw. now it’s out from our head.

The 2nd image is Air. our mind. the logic and skills we use for our drawing.

at the end, we will become happy or sad with the result XD and that’s Water!

The 2nd part of the skeleton of the signs is their Attribute. they call it Modality too. which are:

Cardinal type [ Aries Cancer Libra Capricorn ]

Fixed type [ Taurus Leo Scorpio Aquarius ]

Mutable type [ Gemini Virgo Sagittarius Pisces ]

We begin with the Fixed types. Do you remember this:

You know my dear friend, you can even find a person, that was born in the exact second as you { which means you both have the exact sky map } BUT be totally different! because you will { 100% } have different, childhood and totally different experiences from your lives. it's not only your chart < birth moment character > that will affect you. you  { your experiences from your live } will affect your chart too. and that's the most amazing part of astrology ! which I will teach you in my fictional character analysis.

Fixed type signs are those parts. the parts that our life will affect our Birth-Chart. they are like blank pages that are waiting for something to be written on them. they will be filled with our experiences from our lives. Let's combine the 4 elements with the Fixed type:

Fixed Air: Aquarius | Our Fixed Thoughts Aquarius is Fixed Air. It's our Fixed Thoughts. things that we chose to believe. people with extremely strong Aquarius would have problems to understand their mistakes. they can't change their fixed mind easily. On the other hand, Aquarius's positive job is to make us keep things. if someone has a week Aquarius, she/he would easily get influenced by others. Aquarius has other meanings too. this is its base meaning.

Fixed Water: Scorpio | Our Fixed Emotions Scorpio is the Pain that we decide to keep inside our self. it's how we define pain. how we handle it and and until when. there is a point that Scorpio will attack. and it depends on our life. what is danger for us? People with hard lives will have damaged Scorpio. depend on their lives, they will have a pattern to protect them self for an emotional breakdown. Scorpio has other meanings too. this is its base meaning.

Fixed Earth: Taurus | Our Fixed Livestyle In astrology one part of Taurus meaning { as Fixed earth } is Resistance. Things we already have and do in our live { Reality } and want to keep them as they are. Taurus has other meanings too. this is its base meaning.

Fixed Fire: Leo | Our Fixed Self Leo is our main character. who we are. why we chose to be who we are. we will fill our blank Leo page when we are a child. why we chose to become an Artist, a Doctor and so on. why did we attract to them and start to define ourselves with them? Leo has other meanings too. this is its base meaning.

Let's continue with Mutable types. Their job is to correct { change } our Fixed signs.

Mutable Air: Gemini | correcting Fixed Air [Aquarius] Remember what was Gemini? how we talk. how we put our thoughts into words. it's also how we discuss things. Gemini's job is to correct Aquarius. our Fix thoughts. people with strong Gemini can easily change their wrong beliefs. they can also discuss almost every subject and don't get extremely mad or upset.  Gemini has other meanings too. this is its base meaning.

Mutable Fire: Sagittarius | correcting Fixed Fire [Leo] Sagittarius is the opposite sign of Gemini. so let's use it to define Sagittarius. Gemini is discussing. for discussing we need at least 2 people. so Sagittarius most be talking to ourselves. and that's correct! Sagittarius job is to correct Leo, our Fixed self. Sagittarius will act like a mirror for Leo. Do we know ourselves right? Is this me? Sagittarius has other meanings too. this is its base meaning.

Mutable Earth: Virgo | correcting Fixed Earth [Taurus] Remember what was Virgo? Virgo is analyzing things that already exist. like our Taurus. Virgo has other meanings too. this is its base meaning.

Mutable Water: Pisces | correcting Fixed Water [Scorpio] Pisces will change our limit for taking pain. Pisces has other meanings too. this is its base meaning.

If we look into our Birth-Chart like a system, Cardinal signs are the entry points to this system. how our chart will get Triggered by any event. as time will pass and we grow up, the entry point may change. depending on your current character. but at first, they are our entry points.

I like to add to another definition to them. Cardinal signs have a relation with the Fixed signs. Cardinal signs are like a surface for the Fixed signs. they are very similar to the Fixed signs. but they have a lighter meaning.

Cardinal Fire: Aries | The starting layer of [Leo] َAries is the starting point that we know ourselves { = Our Fixed self. which is our Leo. }  Aries meaning as the Cardinal Fire is very similar to Leo but it's not as deep as Leo. still Aries has a self meaning inside it. because of its Fire element. Aries is the part of us that is completely visible. it's not hidden, it's not Incomplete or waiting for shaping. it's just there. if you say I hate it when other people bossing me around, it's Aries. but if you ask your self why, the answer would be a part of your Leo.

Cardinal Water: Cancer | The starting layer of [Scorpio] Cancer is the starting point of our emotions. unlike Scorpio, Cancer doesn't take any pain inside. it lets them completely  out. Cancer is the pain that we let out on our own will. this sign will give people extreme emotions.

Cardinal Air: Libra | Others Do you remember this: In one simple word, Libra would be: { Others } Its opposite sign Aries: In one simple word, Aries would be: { Self: How we differentiate ourselves from others } as you can see we can see Libra’s meaning, [ which is the opposite sign ] here. not any self. the self that we differentiate ourselves from others. New: So, in other words, Libra will make a definition of the term { We } for us. How much we are willing to give ourselves { Aries }  up for others { Libra }. let’s not forget that Libra does this for the sake of all { we }.

Cardinal Earth: Capricorn | Acting by facts Capricorn is Cancer’s { emotions } opposite sign. so we can say Capricorn is very emotionless XD. it's not like that Capricorn is heartless or cruel. they don't act emotionally { Watery }. they act by facts { Reality = Earth }. In most horoscopes { = personal Astrology. Sun Sign only } Capricorns are defined as great leaders. other signs can be great leaders too. the thing is that people with strong Capricorn, are one of them. because they can mostly make good decisions. without sadness, rage or regret. { they all are negative emotions. and it's because Cancer is the pain that we let out on our own will. }

（　＾＾）人（＾＾　）we are done with 90%

Remember Ruler-ship: Ruler-Ship is a kind of relation.

#1 { Mars | Aries + 1st House } #2 { Venus | Taurus + 2nd House } #3 { Mercury | Gemini + 3rd House } #4 { Moon | Cancer + 4th House }  #5 { Sun | Leo + 5th House } #6 { Mercury | Virgo + 6th House }  #7 { Venus | Libra+ 7th House }  #8 { Pluto + Mars | Scorpio  + 8th House }  #9 { Jupiter | Sagittarius + 9th House } #10 { Saturn | Capricorn + 10th House } #11 { Uranus |  Aquarius + 11 House } #12 { Neptune |  Pisces+ 12 House } 

#3 { Mercury | Gemini + 3rd House }

#6 { Mercury | Virgo + 6th House }

Mercury is:

Our mind

It Rules both Gemini and Virgo

Gemini is how we talk { put our thoughts to words }

Virgo is analyzing things that already exist.

Each planet, sign, and house will have a meaning. like I said before astrology is the art of combining their meanings. you can learn a lot about each one. but if you are not able to combine them, it would be useless. we learned the 2 parts of astrology's skeleton. Elements and Attributes. and then we have learned to combine those 2 and get the base meaning of the signs.

it's very important: it was their base meaning and not all what they are. I decide to talk more about their meaning in my character analysis. it would be more fun and effective (◕▽◕✿) so for now, I will write a few words for each reaction group.

Sun:  What we want, Personal identity

Moon: What we need, Sense of security , Feelings

Mercury: Thinking, communication, intellect, learning

Venus: Sensuality, love, harmony, pleasure, things we like 

Mars: Actions, energy, courage, assertiveness

Jupiter: Happiness, optimism, expansion

Saturn: Cons, Restriction, order 

Uranus: Originality, freedom, revolution 

Neptune: Fantasy, illusion, spirituality, imagination

Pluto: Transformation, regeneration, power, pain

South/North nodes { The Lunar Nodes }

Lilith

Chiron

{ South/North nodes } They are not planets, but rather astrology mathematical points, that are directly opposite each other in the chart. they will be in opposite signs and houses.so let’s see what are those nods:

As you can see in the last image, the Moon and the Sun both have a rotating orbit around the earth. there are 2 points, that these 2 orbits cross each other. and they are the Lunar nods { South/ North Nods }.

South Node: What we already have in our personality,  comfort zone, your habitual place

North Node: What we should learn in our lives, life lessons and what you’re striving for in this lifetime.

You can read more about them HERE

{ Lilith } Lilith is a fictional point - the second empty focal point of elliptical orbit of the Moon around the Earth. Lilith is our dark side.

{ Chiron } Chiron is an asteroid between Saturn and Uranus. Its orbit is very unusual and represents a bridge between material and spiritual worlds. Chiron is the Wounded Healer. it means that we are born with some wounds. in our life, we will learn how to cure them. better than anyone. like a master. because these wounds have been with us from the beginning and are parts of us. after that, when we heal our wounds, we can do the same for other people, that have the same wounds. but they didn't get them from the beginning like us.

Chiron’s story According to mythology, Chiron was a great healer, wise teacher and one of the immortal Centaurs. Unfortunately, he was "deadly" injured by a poisonous arrow by Heracles, his favourite disciple. He was suffering in great pain but he could not die. Finally, he gave up his immortality for the benefit of Prometheus who was also suffering, and Chiron was sent to the underworld. In the underworld Zeus had mercy for him and he raised him to the heaven.  In astrology, Chiron symbolises our unhealable injuries and incurable trauma. However, if a person, instead of drowning in his own trauma, is able to accept the trauma and help others who are also suffering, and accept that suffering is part of life, then Chiron may be the key to wisdom, or even to some sort of "Initiation Gate". 

Here are the planets symbols. in astrology we call them Glyphs. so here are the  glyphs for each planet. planets glyphs are alchemy symbols. like the glyph for Mars, is the symbol of Iron in alchemy. you can read more about them HERE.

we are finished with the planets^^ please keep in mind I will talk more about their meaning in my character analysis. it would be more fun and effective (◕▽◕✿)

In astrology, an aspect is an angle the planets make to each other in our Birth-char. so let’s take a look at this image. the colorful lines are the Aspects:

In this sample, the moon is in the sign Taurus and 8th house. it’s how we read a birth-chart  (︢⓪ ᴗ ︢⓪✿)

For understanding the effect of aspects, try to imagine the earth in the middle of the birth-chart. it's like those planets are talking to us. can you feel their combine force?

If they are 2 or more planets at the same place: it's like they are on the same side. they are friends with each other. { If they don't have a natural opposite meaning }

If they are 2 or more planets at the exact opposite place: each of them wants you to Follow it. 

Here are the major aspects:

#1 The Conjunction:  when 2 or more planets are at the same place in the birth-chart. Example: people with Mercury { mind } and Mars { action } Conjunction. when these 2 are in the same place, we will have a person that is very skilled with talking. it's like they talk with their mind OR think with their mouth. there is no delay between them.

#2 The Opposition: when 2 or more planets are exactly at the opposite place in the birth-chart. This means they're around 180 degrees apart. Example: people with Jupiter { optimism } and Saturn { Real Earthy fear - cons } Opposition. when these 2 are around 180 degrees apart, the person who has this, will think a lot! especially when they face a problem and have to decide. they think a lot of time about the good and bad things { their decision }. it's a good thing to have this aspect. BUT it can cause over-thinking and lack of action.

#3 The Trine: when 2 or more planets, are placed on the vertices of an Equilateral triangle. the Trine is an aspect formed when planets are three signs apart, or about 120 degrees apart. that means the planets involved, will be in signs, with the same elements { Here is Fire } as you can see in the picture, we need 3 planets 120 degrees apart from each other to form a complete Trine. BUT every 2 planets that are about 120 degrees apart, will make a Trine. because they are part of a complete Trine.

#4 The Sextile: when 2 or more planets, are placed on the vertices of an Hexagons. the Sextile is an aspect formed when planets are 2 signs apart, or about 60 degrees apart. that means the planets involved, will contain 2 elements { Here Fire and Air }. as you can see in the picture, we need 6 planets 6 degrees apart from each other to form a complete Sextile. BUT every 2 planets that are about 60 degrees apart, will make a Sextile. because they are part of a complete Sextile.

#5 The Square: when 2 or more planets, are placed on the vertices of an Square. the Square is an aspect formed when planets are 3 signs apart, or about 90 degrees apart. that means the planets involved, will have the same attribute { Here are Cardinals  }. as you can see in the picture, we need 4 planets 90 degrees apart from each other to form a complete Square. BUT every 2 planets that are about 90 degrees apart, will make a Square. because they are part of a complete Square.

Pictures are from HERE

NOTE Do you remember this: If they are 2 or more planet at the exact opposite place, each of them wants you to Follow it.The Opposition { 180 degrees } and The Square { 90 degrees } are acting the same. they will want us to just follow them. and not the other planet. their difference is that it’s easier to break the loop in Square { 90 degrees }. but it’s very hard for The Opposition { 180 degrees }.

yes we are done ( ´･ω･)人(・ω・｀ ) thank you so much for your precious time ^^ please ask me if you have any questions!

I will write another post: Common Mistakes in Astrology

[cbcdiversity]

Author Q&A with Nadine Jolie Courtney

Tell us about your most recent book and how you came to write/illustrate it.

All-American Muslim Girl is a YA novel born of my own experiences as a white-passing mixed-race Muslim in Georgia. I’m the daughter of a Jordanian-Circassian father and a blond Catholic cheerleader from Florida who converted to Islam when she and my dad got married. Most people have an image in their minds when they hear the words ‘Muslim girl’—and it’s definitely not me. As a result, I was exposed to a lot of harmful stealth Islamophobia over the years, moving unnoticed through predominantly white spaces as guards were down and people dropped casually bigoted comments. Post Trump, that stealth Islamophobia became blatant. I felt compelled to write an Islam-positive story of a young girl who, like me, initially struggles with a lack of connection to her religion but eventually chooses to actively embrace it, exploring how that affects her relationships along the way.

Do you think of yourself as a diverse author/illustrator?

I’ve always had lot of anxiety about my identity, something I address in AAMG (and tried to work through, in my MC of Allie Abraham!) On the one hand, I grew up feeling very much like an outsider, no matter what room I was in. When I was out with my visibly foreign father or my hijabi family members, the reception was noticeably different to what I’d get when out alone with my Barbie-esque mom. People would make fun of my last name (an impossible to pronounce Circassian name rife with consonants). Faces would change when they found out my family’s religion or background. But, on the other hand, my experience as a Muslim has still been very different from those of my Muslim friends and family members—to say nothing of my Brown and Black Muslim sisters. My lighter skin and ability to “pass” as a basic blonde has shielded me from the worst Islamophobia—something I am both grateful for and, honestly, a little ashamed of.

Who is your favorite character of all time in children’s or young adult literature?

It’s a four-way tie between Ramona Quimby, Anne Shirley, Jo March, and Hermione Granger. Feisty young women for the win!

Hypothetically speaking, let’s say you are forced to sell all of the books you own except for one. Which do you keep?

Oh my goodness! Okay, well, since this is purely hypothetical, I’m going to pretend we’re only talking about fiction books. From there…oof. When my husband and I got married, we thinned out our respective book collections, and it was torture. My answer would probably change depending on my mood, but for right now, I’d say my most dog-eared, weather-beaten book: an ancient, well-loved Norton Anthology of Poetry that I’ve had since I was 14. Barring that, my Harry Potter series, which I’m saving to read with my daughter when she’s old enough.

What does diversity mean to you as you think about your own books?

I feel like there’s often this checklist mentality toward diversity in literature, and it comes across as not only inauthentic but completely harmful. To me personally, diversity is about moving past seeing white as a default and not prioritizing the white gaze. It’s about recognizing that our stories are better when they reflect the world as it really is, in all its complexity. When you’re a marginalized teenager, maybe somebody who’s occasionally ill at ease around your peers, books can be your safe haven—a place where you can lose yourself and forget about whatever issues you’re going through, if briefly. Now imagine you read a book and it’s you, your life, your experiences reflected back on the page. How much less alone might you feel? How meaningful is that for a young person—questioning themselves, questioning their place—to realize there are others out there like them? That’s why I think it’s so important to not have publishing continue to churn out the same perspectives, the same heroes and heroines. Those stories have been told. Let’s shine the light elsewhere for a while and see what blooms.

What is your thought process in including or excluding characters of diverse backgrounds?

For All-American Muslim Girl, it was important to me to include Muslims from a variety of backgrounds, races, and ethnicities—because that’s the reality of Islam. It’s not just Arab Muslims, which is the default in the media. It’s Indonesian Muslims and Black Muslims and Desi Muslims and Muslim converts. I’m a Circassian Muslim, so though I’m fair like a lot of Muslims from the Caucausus region, my family have been Muslims for generations. I wanted to show not just that diversity of background, but also of thought: the book is full of a variety of young Muslim women who interpret the religion in vastly different ways and enjoy respectfully debating those disparate views. The Ummah is stronger and richer not in spite of our differences but because of them.

Nadine Jolie Courtney is the author of the upcoming YA novel All-American Muslim Girl (November 12, 2019, FSG), as well as the YA novel Romancing the Throne, and two adult books: Confessions of a Beauty Addict, and Beauty Confidential. A graduate of Barnard College, her articles have appeared in Town & Country, Angeleno, OprahMag.com, and Vogue.com. She lives in Santa Monica, California, with her family. 

Website: nadinejoliecourtney.com; Instagram: @nadinejoliecourtney; Twitter: @nadinecourtney

[popatochisssp]

Snips & Snails 2/7

Series: Undertale, Horrortale Relationship(s): HT!Sans/Reader Chapter Warnings: *sex! But other than that, none, it's pretty vanilla!

It takes a lot of courage to get naked with your interspecies partner for the first time.

AO3 Link

BRAVERY (Optionally Canon)

It was something you’d been wondering about for awhile.

A delicate type of question—the sort that could only arise from a relationship like yours, with such a wide gulf between your cultures, your customs, and even your biology itself—so of course, it should be raised with the utmost care and respect.

You were pretty mad at yourself for just blurting it out one afternoon while watching TV.

“Hey, do monsters…y’know?”

Sans roused a little from where he’d been starting to slump over a little, on the verge of dozing off. “do monsters what...?” he asked.

“…Y’know. Do……sex?”

“………”

The ensuing silence was enough to make you fully appreciate the inanity of your question.

But it was already too late to take it back, so you just…waited for Sans’ response.

“snrk…heheheheheh…hahahaha, oh my god, babe…!”

Your cheeks feel damningly hot.

“I…! Shut up, it’s! A very valid question!”

Sans continues laughing, covering his face with his hand like he could hide the fact that he was laughing at you more than with you.

“yuh…yeah,” he chuckled, “you’re so valid… ya’ gotta know if i can take ya’ to the bonezone, right?”

“Oh my god.”

You have a lot of regrets right now.

So many.

Most of them about dating this cackling skeleton who has no pity for your embarrassed plight.

…That’s a lie, you don’t regret a second of that.

Just the seconds you spent asking such a dumb question out loud, how insensitive and tone-deaf could you be, anyway?!

At least Sans was having a good sense of humor about it.

“awww, baby, don’t…” He seems to take notice of your humiliation…though not enough to stop laughing. “heheh, don’t, c’mon, c’mere, i’m sorry for laughin’…”

You let him tug you closer under his arm, but you don’t look him in the eye-socket. “No, you’re not.”

Sans snickers unapologetically.

“nah, not really,” he admits. “that…that was hilarious, you’re adorable.”

He nuzzles the top of your head as if to prove it, the gesture full of affection.

Mostly it just makes you feel patronized…and a little indignant, now that you think about it.

“Well! You can’t really blame me for asking, can you?” you demand. “You have the advantage here, I’m human! You know we do sex stuff because we put it everywhere!”

And that was true: you could hardly go two steps in real life or two clicks on the internet without stumbling over something sexual and human-related.

A monster with a human partner, a human crush, or just some curiosity about humans had a whole wealth of studies and images and pornography at their fingertips to answer all of their questions.

“I’ve never even heard of monster porn,” you mutter.

“heheheh, well, yeah, that stuff’s private.”

You frown. “So, there is monster porn…it’s just…for monsters only?”

Sans shrugs a little. “not strictly, but…yeah, more or less so far.”

…You were just getting more confused. “Then how does…how do you share it?”

Your first, hilariously silly thought was some kind of underground information network— risqué monster photos being passed across bars in manila envelopes by monsters in trench-coats.

Obviously it couldn’t possibly be that.

But, “eh, i think by phone, mostly,” was not really what you expected to hear, either.

Like…like sexting? Just sending a sexy picture to your partner?

It was starting to sound a little bit like…

“Is monster porn just…individual? Like…one on one?”

Sans didn’t even seem to understand the question. “yeah? it’d be pretty embarrassing for some stranger to end up with your nudes, wouldn’t it?”

You weren’t sure what to say to that.

Of course leaked nudes would be embarrassing, that was private stuff…but humans still wanted to look at sexy things? Porn didn’t just not exist because some people were private…

You have the feeling there’s a cultural miscommunication happening here, but you don’t have the slightest idea where to begin at clearing it up.

Sans seems to notice how confused you are and takes a crack at it himself.

“oh. right, i forgot, humans are all…mix an’ match.”

“…Mix and match?”

“y’know,” he explains, “standardized, compatible. ya’ got the same, uh…stuff.”

“No?” What kind of human porn had Sans seen? “There’s lots of different kinds of human ‘stuff’…”

Sans rolled his eye-light. “sure, yeah, but it’s…it’s all on the one spectrum, at least. ya’ could actually cover it all in a sex-ed class, not like for monsters.”

Monsters, who were ostensibly all the same species, but had such a wide array of subspecies that they had managed to completely stump human systems of categorization when they surfaced.

You thought of the first monster couple that came to mind—Burr and Audrey, a bunny and a plant—and tried, probably very unsuccessfully, to imagine what sort of things went on in their bedroom.

Ohhh… ‘Mix and match.’

You think you’re starting to get it.

At least with humans, there was a relatively limited number of things you could find in somebody’s pants, and probably some sort of guarantee that you could do something with those parts and make each other feel good.

Monsters? They probably didn’t have that same luxury.

You look up at Sans, frowning. “Wait, so…do monsters even have sex-ed if you can’t…?”

Thankfully, your curiosity doesn’t seem to be an offensive topic.

“heheheh, yeah, we have it. it’s pretty much the usual, ‘be responsible and considerate to your partner’ stuff, just no…diagrams or whatever, ‘cause everybody’s ‘different and unique’ an’ that’s something we’re supposed to explore on our own.”

Your eyebrows shoot up. “You’re encouraged to explore yourself?”

“‘round that age, yeah. gotta figure out your own good spots so you can help your partner find ‘em later, when you’re ready.” The ridges above his eye-sockets crumple a little in confusion. “human sex-ed doesn’t…?”

You scoff.

“Not enough of it. It usually doesn’t even bring up anything besides the ‘default’ sexuality.” The thought gives you pause. “But…monsters, if you’re all so different, do you…how does sexuality even work?”

Your question makes Sans chuckle again. “that, uh…that’s a little broad, ain’t it?”

…Boy, it sure is.

Sans is a monster, but he’s hardly the spokesman for his entire species.

You feel your cheeks starting to heat again, but before you can apologize, he starts talking.

“far as i can tell, though, humans put a lot more stock into all that label stuff than we do. lots of categories and specifics…think i tried lookin’ it up once, to see if there’s a human word for…what most of us are.”

You watch as Sans pulls out his phone and starts scrolling through old notes, things he jotted down in case he wanted to reference it later.

“oof. this was real early surface days. especially shitty at note-takin’ back then,” he admits. “i got no idea what i was gettin’ at here. mean anything to you?”

He angles the screen toward you and see some strange characters on the screen, jumbled up and indecipherable to you. There’s only two words in normal text that you can actually read, toward the bottom.

‘pan’

‘demi??’

“Oh!” Well, that made some sense. “So, for monsters…gender and stuff isn’t important, you’re just…attracted to whoever you like? That way?”

Sans looks…a little impressed by the swiftness of your conclusion. “huh. maybe there is somethin’ to those labels. that’s…i mean, basically, yeah?”

The porn thing was making a lot more sense to you in light of this new information.

Mass-produced pornography probably wouldn’t have nearly as much of a niche in a society where the majority of individuals only experienced sexual attraction alongside an emotional connection.

You do wonder just how much monster erotica is floating around with fictional characters…but you decide not to ask about that.

There’s a way more important implication in what Sans just told you that needs some addressing.

“Does that mean…does that mean you’re attracted to me?”

It seemed like a silly question. You kind of felt dumb again for even asking, since Sans was dating you, of course he…it should be a given that he was attracted to you!

But…it had…been some time, since you’d first gotten together and he hadn’t…

Maybe it wasn’t so much of a given, if you were this far into your relationship and only just now bringing up the topic.

It feels like the kind of thing you probably need to find out before going any further, even if the thought of a negative answer was starting to make you a little nervous.

But to your relief, Sans slowly turns blue and starts to laugh—the way he did when he was feeling especially shy or flustered.

“eheheheheheheh, i, uh…ah, jeez, i didn’t mean to make ya’ ask,” he says a little apologetically. “i…i like ya’, don’t i? so…so of course i…” He cleared his nonexistent throat. “yeah. yes. you’re…yes.”

He’s so cute.

Sans reminds you so often of why you’re dating him and with the affection (and no small amount of relief) you’re feeling, you find it easy to say, “Well, that’s good, ‘cause I’m pretty attracted to you, too. Maybe you can show me sometime where your ‘good spots’ are…”

You didn’t think it was possible, but your flirty tone seems to make him blush even harder.

It’s adorable…but just in case that was a little too strong and he’s actually uncomfortable or something, you dial yourself back a bit.

“I mean, it doesn’t…have to be now, or anything,” you assure him, gently patting the arm he still has wrapped around you. “Just…cards on the table, y’know? Thought I should…make it clear I’m interested, for whenever y—”

“how about now?”

You pause, looking back up at Sans.

He still looks very shy, his skull literally aglow with it, but he meets your eye with impressive boldness for such an easily flustered skeleton.

“‘cause…that’d be…i’d like to…do that. with…with you…”

Oh…

………Oh!

“Are you sure?” you ask him, even though you’re smiling; even though you can already feel yourself getting eager just thinking about taking this step with Sans.

He’s someone you trust, someone you care about, and most importantly somebody you think you could have a lot of fun with.

It doesn’t hurt that you’ve already seen him with his shirt off and really liked what you saw.

If he’s ready, then…so are you!

Your excitement must be contagious—the blue on Sans’ face is starting to fade, being replaced by a crooked grin that looks…

“yeah,” he says, his baritone voice so low it makes you shiver. “i am…really, really sure.”

Your heart starts to beat faster. “Upstairs…?”

-

No sooner said than done, apparently.

You love having a boyfriend that can teleport because in the blink of an eye, you’re there—in Sans’ room, in his bed while he dips down to you for a nuzzle.

You smile and reach up to him, pressing your lips to his teeth and jaw with an eagerness that makes him chuckle.

You knew it would, just like you knew he’d lean back against his pillows and tug you up on top of him with an ease that swoops your stomach and makes you laugh, too.

This part is nothing new.

Smooching Sans is just as fun as it’s always been, easy to get lost in. The polished softness of bone against your lips is one of your favorite sensations, and his big hands petting along your body, gentle and exploring is pleasantly addicting.

This time, though…there’s something new in it, something charged in the air.

You can feel it behind every kiss and in every excited touch of phalanges, giddily skimming just beneath your clothes like getting to touch your bare skin is something Sans can’t quite believe he’s allowed to do.

You want more of it.

You push forward with your hands, shoving at the shoulders of Sans’ hoodie until the fabric starts to slide. Sans seems to realize your intention and he stops petting at you just long enough to pull his arms out of it, letting the well-loved jacket crumple underneath him on the bed.

Sans looks…different without the hoodie—more solid, more real somehow—and if your fingers hadn’t itched to touch him before, they certainly do now.

You don’t deny yourself the pleasure.

Sans hums happily when you dive back down to his mouth, kissing him even as you start to stroke along his clavicles through his t-shirt. He nuzzles at you a little harder, trying to chase you as you trail your lips down further, past his jaw and onto the thick vertebrae of his neck.

The bony discs are a new sensation against your lips, enticingly strange, and you find yourself peppering more and more kisses along the column of Sans’ throat, trying to commit it to memory.

You only pause when a particularly firm smooch makes him shudder, hard.

“Not good?” you ask, pulling back a little so you can actually look him in the eye-socket.

Sans isn’t looking at you, though.

He’s flushed again, his red eye-light angled down and to the left— nervous.

“it’s…fine,” he assures you slowly. “i, uh…that’s…maybe……one of my…spots?”

It takes you a second to process…and then you grin.

“A good one?”

Sans’ eye-light shrinks a little. He must remember hearing this tone in your voice before, at least once.

“………go easy on me…?”

Not a chance.

You lean in and give him another kiss, open-mouthed, and when you drag the flat of your tongue along his vertebrae he gasps.

You like that reaction.

You keep at it, mouthing at his neck with lips and tongue and the occasional graze of teeth—bone on bone that gets Sans breathing heavy and trying to press up into it.

When he starts to squirm, his fingers digging into your hips, you can’t help but feel powerful up here on top of him, learning how to take this gentle giant apart with your mouth alone.

The thought of how much more you could do…

It’s heady.

Sans still has his shirt on and that seems wrong so you start to tug at it, wanting it off.

“wait,” he pants, pulling back a little. “wait, i…you, too, okay? i…wanna see ya’…”

The sentiment behind the breathless admission hits you hard.

Sans wants to see you, too.

He wants to look at you, at your body that you’d never really thought was anything special and he even seems excited about it.

…Maybe he’s thinking the same thing about you right now, and that makes you smile: you’re just two goofballs, both delightedly confused that you want to undress each other.

“Sounds good to me,” you say, and then you’re peeling off your shirt, helping Sans out of his own and then…

There you are.

Both…topless in front of each other, just…looking.

He looks just as good to you as he did that day at the beach. His broad-set torso looks so sturdy, more like it was sculpted from marble than just a happy accident of bone, and it’s too alluring for you to resist.

You reach out, stroking your fingers over all the newly exposed territory: his clavicles, his sternum, the almost graceful curves of his ribs.

(You’re careful to avoid the ones toward the bottom. You remember he was ticklish there…)

Sans lets you explore, not particularly reacting to your touch. More than anything, he seems focused on you, his eye-light roving all over your bare chest and stomach like he’s trying to memorize you.

Maybe he is.

But he looks like he wants to touch you, too, and just…isn’t, so maybe he could use a little push.

“Hey,” you say gently and you want to laugh at the way he looks right up at your face, like a schoolboy caught staring out the window. “You can touch me, too, y’know. You’re not gonna get in trouble.”

“…eheheheheheheh…yeah? you’re not gonna snitch on me?”

“Pfft…!” This damn jokester of yours… “Not if you give me all your lunch money.”

“i’m broke, put it on my tab,” he says, but with the tension broken, he finally goes for it.

Sans reaches up to you, his hands framing your ribs with ease. They feel huge on your body, like he could just pick you up and move you however he wanted and the size difference between you is nothing new, but here, in this context, it’s…

Surprisingly hot.

You feel like you’re learning something about yourself, even as he starts to stroke along your chest, thumbing curiously at your nipples, skating his phalanges over your belly lightly enough to raise goosebumps…

Sans looks utterly riveted by it all.

“you’re so……soft,” he murmurs eventually, like it’s something to marvel at.

You laugh a little.

Literally any human must seem soft to somebody who’s made of bone, but you still find yourself flattered anyway. The way Sans says it makes it seem like a good thing and he keeps pawing at you, petting you like he’s so enamored by your body that he can’t stop.

There’s a clumsy eagerness to it that’s a little endearing…and a lot sexy.

You lean in, kissing him again except this time with your bare chest pressed up against his ribs. He nuzzles you back and by the way he flattens one of those big hands of his against the middle of your back, holding you tighter against him, you guess he likes the feeling as much as you do—skin on bone.

You want to know what else Sans likes.

“Where else is good, baby?” you mumble against his teeth. “Show me, help me out…”

“mmm…alright, twist my arm…”

But he grasps at your fingers and pulls them, guiding them down, down…

Into his rib-cage?

…Huh.

When Sans gently settles your fingertips against the underside of his sternum, you’re not sure what you’re expecting, but when you rub and he moans, you perk right up, utterly delighted.

You rub more, feeling the bone heat beneath your touch, and Sans quickly starts panting again. You explore a little with your other hand—the underside of his ribs doesn’t seem to do nearly as much for him, but when you reach his spine you know you’ve struck oil.

All you have to do is stroke the seams of his lower vertebrae—the lumbar ones, you think—and Sans’ whole body jolts, nearly bucking you off if not for the way you catch yourself on a rib at the last second.

He stares at you with wide eye-sockets, too stunned by his own reaction to be sheepish.

“……fuck,” he says emphatically. “didn’t…i wasn’t expectin—ghhk!”

You latch back onto his spine, not even bothering letting him finish. That was hot and you want to see what other reactions you can wring out of him.

Sans starts trembling, huffing when you go after his sternum again too, and your mouth on his neck makes that delightfully deep voice of his pitch higher than you’ve ever heard it go.

“mmnn, ba—nnh—baby…waaaait,” he practically whines, as if you weren’t already turned on. “come onnnn, sl—ohhhhh stars, fuck, i wa…i wanna…nngh…”

He trails off, breathing quicker and going almost limp against the pillows behind him and it occurs to you that you might actually be able to make Sans come, just from this.

The thought is tempting (and very, very sexy), but it seemed like Sans actually wanted to say something and far be it from you to keep him from it.

Sans groans when you back off, almost helplessly disappointed, and you smirk at him.

“What, baby?” you tease. “What’d you want?”

He doesn’t answer you right away; maybe can’t. There’s a glazed look in that red eye of his that makes you feel ready to pounce and it’s a real struggle to just sit there patiently while he catches his breath.

“i wa…i wanna make you feel good, too,” he slowly articulates. “lemme…lemme do that for you. show me how.”

You chuckle. “I don’t think I can feel that good as long as I’ve got pants on. Hang on a sec.”

Without even thinking about it, you slide yourself off of Sans and start to shimmy out of your pants and underwear. He sits up on his elbows to watch you, enraptured, and it’s not until you have everything off that you fully realize…

You’re naked, in front of Sans, your boyfriend…for the very first time.

Until right this second, you’d been riding pretty high on the confidence boost of making Sans unravel but now, much as you hate to admit it, you feel your self-consciousness starting to hit you.

You’re…not a model. You’re not a celebrity, either. You’re just you, and your body is…

You know what Sans said, about being attracted to you, but suddenly you can’t help but think that maybe now that he’s actually seeing all of you, it might not be…what he was hoping for.

“Uh…” You bite your lip a little, feeling your face heat. “I guess I’m, uh…haha probably a little different from the humans in…porn….”

“no kiddin’…”

…ouch.

But then Sans keeps talking.

“this is way better. stars above, you’re…”

He doesn’t finish the sentence, like he’s at a legitimate loss for words and that’s…fine.

You didn’t need your heart, anyway.

Sans gets up, mattress springs creaking as he moves toward you. His eye-light is locked onto your body and you nearly remind him that your eyes are up here, but with the awed focus on his face right now, you’re not sure he’d care.

His phalanges reach for you, pausing tentatively halfway.

“i… can i…?” he asks, almost hushed.

You don’t know that anyone’s ever been so eager or so careful about touching you before.

Sans has such a knack for making you feel special.

“Yeah, go ahead.”

With permission, Sans touches you, nudging your legs apart. Butterflies in your stomach, you let him even though your heart pounds at the intent in his gaze as he pets along your inner thighs.

The first curious brush of his big fingers against your most sensitive areas makes you shiver…and suddenly, you think you must know what Sans felt like when you found some of his good spots.

The grin he gives you is downright wolfish—hungry.

“tell me,” he rumbles, so low and sultry that you feel yourself reacting to his voice alone. “tell me what you want me to do.”

Oh, stars…

“Don’t, uh…you don’t already know what to do?” you tease a little weakly. “You’ve seen human porn, right? It’s everywhere, you should be an expert by now.”

Sans snorts. “yeah, sure, i seen it. you’ve seen it, it’s just a lotta…slammin’, in-an’-out stuff that looks good for the camera.”

…Pfft, what a way to describe it!

“that ain’t real stuff,” Sans insists. “i’m askin’ what you want.”

There aren’t a whole lot of guys out there who’d ask a question like that when you were already naked in front of them.

Sans is such a sweetheart…

And if he really wants you to show him what you want, you think you can accommodate him.

“……babe?”

Sans doesn’t quite seem to understand what you’re doing when you crawl forward on the bed and turn your back to him, getting yourself settled between his femurs.

You turn your head straight up and find him looking down at you with a confused frown, but you just smile.

“You want to know what I like, right?” A purely rhetorical question, and you take Sans’ hand in your own, guiding it over you down to the apex of your thighs. “I’ll show you.”

His big, bony fingers are pliant beneath yours and curl easily just the way you want them. You feel him watching when you start to move his hand, tracking the pace, but it’s not long before your body starts responding to the attention.

You know what you like, the best ways to get yourself off, and for the first minute or two, it feels like Sans isn’t even there—just you and your practiced touch making pleasure hum through you, building slowly toward your peak.

It feels good and you start to relax, letting your eyes fall shut and resting your head on Sans’ sternum behind you.

You can’t quite say when Sans starts touching you without your help.

You jolt, gasping when he twists his fingers in a way you definitely weren’t guiding him to. It’s good, though, and not even the smug chuckle that vibrates through you from behind can ruin it.

“how’m i doin’?” he asks, in the tone of a man who knows he’s doing well. “s’it good?”

Of course it is.

His hand is still moving between your legs, just like you showed him, but it’s starting to feel…different. His fingers are so much bigger than yours, and you don’t think you’ve ever handled yourself with such slow, careful curiosity.

Knowing that it’s Sans—exploring you, playing with you, learning how to make you come—makes it feel like so much more than anything you ever did by yourself.

“stars, look at’cha,” he breathes, curling forward over you. “you’re incredible…you’re so hot…can’t believe you’re lettin’ me touch ya’ like this…”

You feel your body starting to really heat up, your breath coming a little harder. The part of you not yet wholly focused on your climbing pleasure manages to notice something very, very important.

Sans is talking way too much.

He’s still talking at all.

You can fix that.

You reach back, slipping your hand up into the cavity of Sans’ torso and blindly groping for his spine. You find it and start to rub at those sensitive seams again, making Sans choke on a gasp.

Finding your voice for a moment, too, you chastise him with a hissed, “Don’t stop!”

He obeys, his hand starting to move again between your legs but this time without any commentary: he’s too busy huffing for breath now as you clumsily stroke his spine.

The only noises you hear out of him are bitten-back groans and they’re music to your ears, fuel for the fire his fingers are stoking higher in you by the second.

You’re pretty sure Sans is right there with you. You can feel in it the way he curls over you a little tighter, nuzzling the top of your head and pawing at your chest with his free hand; touching you everywhere he can while you chase your orgasm together.

You catch it first, just like that—with Sans’ hands on your body as color explodes behind your eyelids, arching your back and knocking your head against his sternum.

If there’s pain, it mingles so completely with the pleasure that you don’t even notice, coasting high on sensation.

You lose your backwards grip on Sans’ spine, but your hand thoughtlessly catches on a rib and you squeeze, trying to ground yourself.

“hnngh…!”

Sans chokes, hunching down over you and apparently that was enough to push him over the edge, too.

The sound of his broken groan may be the sexiest thing you’ve ever heard.

You hope you can remember it…or maybe just get to make him do it again another time.

The two of you spend a few long moments catching your breath together, bodies wrung out and slumped against each other for support.

When you finally speak, it’s simultaneous.

“Wow…”

“wow…”

…………

“Pfft, you goober!” you laugh, but Sans scoffs at you.

“i’m a goober?” he demands. “i think if anybody’s a goober, it’s you.”

You don’t understand the pun at first…but then Sans holds his hand out in front of you, still coated in the evidence of your orgasm and oh, stars, he probably thought that was so gross of you.

“Oh jeez, I…yeah, that happens when humans…there’s…I’ll just go get a t—”

Aaaand, he was already wiping it on his sweatpants.

Charming.

“—or you can do that, I guess…”

Sans settles his chin atop your head. “gonna take a lot more than a little slime to scare me off,” he declares, and for the subject matter, it sounds entirely too sweet.

Maybe for that, you’ll wash his sweatpants for him, so that doesn’t stain.

But the thought gives you pause, quickly followed by a wave of annoyance.

“Shit!” you exclaim, making Sans jump a little. “I didn’t even get your pants off! Damn it!”

As soon as he processes the words, Sans bursts out laughing.

“aww, babe,” he snickers, “seriously, don’t worry about it.”

“Well, you got to see me naked,” you protest, gesturing to your still very nude self. “I want to see you naked, too!”

Sans wraps his arms around you, hugging you close. “you’re not missin’ out on anything, i promise.”

“But—”

“ya’ ever seen one of those…naked plastic skeletons you guys put up everywhere when the leaves change?”

The mirth in his voice is hard to miss but, “Yeah…”

“s’exactly like that. ya’ seen one pelvis, ya’ seen ‘em all.”

You frown. “Really? There’s nothing…down there? Like a…uh.”

It occurs to you that you…may possibly be a silly, oversexed human, expecting a skeleton to have some kind of genitalia.

But before you can get too embarrassed about it, Sans casually adds, “i could make somethin’ for ya’, if ya’ wanted me to.”

“What, s…seriously? Like a…magic d—”

“magic dick, yeah.”

“I…how does…?”

“can show ya’ the tongue if ya’ wanna see how it works? m’pretty good at that one.”

Yes. Yes, you absolutely have to see this.

You twist in Sans’ grip, looking up and holy shit, there it is—a big, translucent blue tongue lolling out from between your boyfriend’s teeth.

You’re fascinated by the sight of it and reach up towards it.

When Sans doesn’t stop you, you actually touch it, just a curious little poke, and it’s…well, more or less what you’d expect a tongue to feel like. It's wet, a little slimy, but also strangely reminiscent of the time you’d shaken Grillby’s hand: something both there and not there at the same time. It seemed to be a lot smoother than a human tongue, too, without all the bumpy taste-buds.

“Can you…does it work?” you have to know. “Can you taste with it?”

The impossible tongue retracts, slipping back behind Sans’ teeth where it just seems to…disappear.

“yeah. it’s magic—it’s me, it does what i want it to. don’t need it to taste stuff, but it’ll do it if i got it out.”

…You can’t even begin to figure out how that makes sense. For your own sanity, you just put it down to ‘magic’ and try to let it go.

“So…magic dick.”

“yeah. if ya’ wanted.”

“Why no magic dick this time?” you ask. “Is it…snrk…is it like the ‘good china,’ you only…whip it out for special occasions?”

You can’t even keep a straight face asking the question. You can’t blame Sans for laughing at it, too.

“heheheh, you’re plenty special, babe,” he assures you. “tongue’s easy, i’ve done a tongue before. gotta research a little before i try something new.”

“‘Research,’” you echo, emphasizing the dubious quotations in your tone.

“haha, no, seriously, actual research. real unsexy, probably…diagrams an’ medical textbooks an’ shit. did the tongue look human to you?”

“No?”

“yeah, ‘cause i winged it.” Sans snuggles you closer against him even as he proposes to you a very philosophical question. “what d’you suppose it’d look like if i tried to mimic some human…stuff, without bein’ able to remember all the details?”

The first image to pop into your head is a semi-phallic…shape, resembling nothing so much as the cheapest, most terrible-looking dildo money could buy.

And then you try to imagine it in blue, suction-cupped onto your boyfriend’s pelvis.

“…hahaha… Hahahahahahaha! Oh no…!”

“i’ll assume by your laughter that whatever ya’ just thought of was hilarious an’ also the least sexy thing ya’ ever pictured in your life.”

You cover your mouth, trying to stifle the chuckling. “A little bit, yeah,” you admit.

“that’s why ya’ gotta let me mess around with it a little first,” Sans explains. “haven’t exactly paid a lot of attention to that stuff before. i can probably make somethin’ a little sexier, but i need the details for that. can’t make somethin’ out of magic unless i can recreate it in my head first—so now’d be the time to start thinkin’ if ya’ got any requests.”

…‘Requests’?

Oh.

The possibilities of that are…actually soberingly incredible, now that you think about it.

You’d never entertained a future where your partner could just…make anything for you, if you gave him enough time to work out how. Images were suddenly racing through your head, each sexier and more fantastical than the last.

Anything.

Amazing!

“if ya’ don’t wanna wait, though, i seen a lot of hot dogs, could probably do a pretty good one a’those.”

………

If it weren’t for Sans’ arms around you, you think you’d double all the way over with how hard your laughter hits you; hard enough to make you wheeze.

“A hot dog?! Shut up, you’re the worst!”

“heheheheh, don’t you mean ‘the wurst’?”

“Fffffffffff…!”

You can’t even tell him how much you hate him because you’re laughing too hard.

It’s probably just as well, since that would be a total lie.

Optionally canon scene to Fur a Good Time, Call…  Could take place anytime after Chapter 12, if you're looking to place it in the continuity. A sex scene--even one as fluffy as this--just didn't quite seem to fit in the vibe of the original story, so I left it out.

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