#but im ready to acknowledge it and keep facing it instead of turning away all the time...

[yanderes-galore]

IM HERE AGAIN!! Anyways, can you do Yuji with your prompts 23 and 37 with a reader who keeps trying to escape?

I can try, sure! Doing an AU where you knew each other in Jujutsu High but once you graduated and grew older you went on to become advanced Sorcerers. It's unknown if Yuji still has Sukuna or not. Sorry if the plot isn't to your liking, I didn't have a lot to work with since Yuji is so tame on his own.

Yandere! Yuji Itadori Prompts 23 + 37

"You're crying... come a little closer, I'll make it all go away."

"We should get married! It's been long enough, hasn't it?"

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Kidnapping, Delusional behavior, Manipulation, Stalking, Isolation, Talks of marriage, Toxic themes, Clingy behavior, Slight starvation (You're choosing not to eat a lot), Implied mind break, Yuji is delusional yet a little lucid, Consensual turned forced relationship.

Yuji Itadori has been your boyfriend since graduation. He had been hopelessly in love with you ever since you two started to dedicate yourselves more to your field and each other. Life's been good in your eyes, especially since Yuji has only ever been getting better when handling himself.

So how did things get so bad?

Nowadays instead of being a happy couple, you're trapped in your apartment. Yuji was adamant when you both graduated to move in together. You both shared the rent and took care of one another.

You didn't mind that...

Until Yuji kept trying to keep you in the apartment.

You wonder what went wrong. Yuji always seemed like such a kind and innocent boyfriend. Always easily excited and clingy with you. It was cute.

You wonder if things began to go wrong when Yuji had brought up marriage.

You still remember when he first brought up the question. You had been dating for around five years when he bounded up to you with a grin on his face. Before you could even ask him what he was so eager about, he held both of your hands tightly.

"We should get married! It's been long enough, hasn't it?"

It was cute how excited he sounded when he brought it up. In fact, if you were ready for it you might've even considered it. He looked so happy.

However, as a new graduate, you were too focused on improving as a Sorcerer to consider marriage with your high school sweetheart. Curses still ran rampant even after graduation. So at the time, you were focused on your career.

"I'm sorry, baby..." You had said, your heart nearly breaking at the look of betrayal on your boyfriend's face. "It just doesn't seem safe right now... we both have a career to keep up with."

"R-Right... I understand!" Yuji has responded with a saddened smile, embracing you tightly.

Back then... you thought that was that.

You wanted to consider marriage in the future. You two had been together for a long time now. Although... you just wanted to focus on more important things right now.

However... now six years in... you begin to wonder if you should've just... accepted or called off the relationship entirely.

"Baby..." Yuji frowns softly, looking at you on the bed. In only a year you looked so much different than the graduate you once were. You looked tired and much thinner now. Yuji had been feeding you, but you just... didn't want any food from him.

"Baby, please look at me..." Yuji tries again, inching closer to sit on the bed. He feels guilt creep into him when he sees you curled in on yourself. Part of him knew this was his fault... but hated the idea of acknowledging it.

Recently you've been escaping the apartment a lot. It had started with arguments, you wanting to continue being a Sorcerer while Yuji wanted you to stay at home so he could protect you. But... every couple has their quarrels, no?

That is until Yuji felt he should be more strict. He begged you not to leave, that he was worried about you and wanted you to stay home. At first, you complied and stayed home a few days to soothe your boyfriend's worries.

Then he stopped letting you out.

Each time you left the apartment by sabotaging locks or playing nice, Yuji would chase you down again. For months you kept trying to leave, both the relationship and apartment. Yet Yuji never relented.

In his eyes you are meant to be together...

Delusional just enough to ignore how you feel about the situation.

Right up until you were curled up in your room, refusing to leave because, well, why bother?

Yuji perks up when he sees your body shudder. A breathy noise akin to a sob leaves your mouth, making Yuji's heart clench. He acts fast, throwing himself on the bed and holding out his arms.

"You're crying... come a little closer, I'll make it all go away." Yuji's words are comforting, as though you're both still loving partners. His embrace feels hot and cagey against your skin. However, you lean in reluctantly.

Did you love him even now?

Yuji is careful to be caring despite all that's happened. He kisses the top of your head lovingly as you sob against him. Hearing you sad makes his grip tighten... a glare thrown towards the wall as he thinks to himself.

He hopes you get better, he really does. He wants to make you his cute little spouse that he can take care of. Although, Yuji is willing to wait until you're feeling... better before bringing it up again.

"Love you so much it hurts...." Yuji murmurs, squeezing you affectionately as he nuzzles into your hair. You say nothing, which is expected, you did recently go against his house rules again.

But... that's okay! Yuji is aware of how determined you are. He just... needs to be patient and protect you like he always has been.

You may be upset now... yet he knows that will change. With a little more waiting... you two can be happy again! When another sob rocks your body, Yuji just holds you tighter... oblivious to how crushing his embrace is.

Partners must stick by one another, right?

He'll stick by you until you're better... then you two can go back to normal and maybe even get engaged!

He's already picked out the ring....

[etclouie]

hi love! happy 600, that’s so cool! as you’re celebrating could you maybe write prompt 28 and 33 with tony dinozzo? they’re both from the 50 prompt list

˚୨୧⋆｡ prompt/s; 28) "what time?" "wow, how romantic, i love my girlfriend and our fun dates" 33) "stop being seductive" "i was being myself, but okay" — from 50 dialogue prompts

˚୨୧⋆｡ warnings; established relationship, reader wears earrings and a dress, reader is also described to be wearing makeup/lipstick, tony being tony, tony being whipped, that’s it i’m pretty sure??

˚୨୧⋆。 a/n; i actually haven’t seen ncis in forever, so if this is heavily ooc im sorry😣

— celebrate 600 with me?

Tony was walking out the building when his phone buzzed in his pocket, his jacket loosely thrown over his shoulder. pulling out his phone and a smile tugging at his lips as he read your message. 

“what time?”

simple enough, he thought. 

you’ve been looking forward to this date since Tony said he managed to get this weekend off of work. 

just the two of you for the next two days. 

instead of typing back a reply, Tony called you instead. sitting in his car and listening to his phone ring, once and then twice before you answered on the third ring. 

“hey you”

his smile widened as he heard your voice, his shift seeming longer than it was and all he wanted was to be with you. 

“i’m coming to get you— be there in..”

he took a pause to check his watch, slowly reading the small hands before he brought the phone back to his ear to continue on. 

“twenty minutes”

laughing to yourself at his words, listening to the roar of his cars engine as he drove home to your house. 

doting around your shared bedroom as you finished putting together your outfit, something you’d hadn’t shown or mentioned to Tony. 

“don’t speed Tony”

you told while slipping on your earrings, your phone on speaker as it sat on your dresser. you heard the chuckle he let out, before following it with a rev of his engine. 

glancing at your reflection in the mirror above the dresser, letting your eyes flicker across your body and humming at the fit of your dress— knowing full well your boyfriend would love it. 

“i would never, i’m offended you’d even suggest such a thing”

he told, you couldn’t see it but you knew he’d have that all too familiar faux innocent look across his face. 

he stayed on the phone his whole drive home, content on listening to you getting ready. smiling to himself as he heard the familiar sound of you spraying your perfume, the same perfume he had bought you for your previous birthday that drove him absolutely crazy every time he smelt it. 

“where are we going again?”

he asked while tapping his fingers against his steering wheel, stopped at a red light and growing impatient the more he was away from you. 

“that fancy Italian place, remember? you know, the one with the romantic ambiance and the 'I'll make you fall in love with pasta' vibes?"

the noise that left his voice mirrored that of acknowledgement as he remembered the restaurant before he faltered back to his usual teasing tone. 

"wow, how romantic, i love my girlfriend and our fun dates"

his twenty minute drive passed by quicker than either of you realised, his terribly awful jokes and teasing keeping you company until he pulled into the driveway. 

the sound of his engine shutting off before the front door was opening had you eagerly waiting in the bedroom for him to come and get you. 

listening to his calls of your name as he made his way throughout the house before he slowly pushed open the bedroom door, his eyes widening at the sight of you. 

turning to him as he tossed his jacket onto the bed before holding his arms out, almost expecting you to curl into him. 

“look at you, you never told me about this little number”

he walked towards you as he spoke, his hands laying on your hips as he pulled you against his chest. 

one of his hands slid further down your body before you were peeling both of his hands away, lacing your fingers while holding your joined hands out to your sides. 

“you’re so pretty— this dress is stunning”

he told, pressing his lips to yours and unlacing your hands to cradle your face. pulling back before he could smudge your lipstick and giggling at the pout across his lips. 

shaking your head as he tried leaning in to kiss you again, untangling yourself from his arms and fixing up your appearance. 

feeling his eyes follow your every move in awe, practically salivating at the small sway of your hips— following behind you like a lost puppy as you walked out of the room. 

"stop being seductive" 

glancing over your shoulder to him and stopping at his words, gasping as he bumped into you at the sudden stop as his attention was on the sway of your hips. 

his hands coming to stop on your hips, his attention on your body and not on his steps as he pressed flush against you. 

dropping his head to rest on your shoulder before tilting it to meet your gaze, flashing you that toothy grin you fell in love with before mumbling out to him.  

"i was being myself, but okay"

eyes meeting his before you pressed a kiss to his lips, untangling yourself from his arms and walking out the house to his car— Tony following behind as if on instinct. 

as if the words weren’t setting properly in his head, he was asking you where you were going again as he was locking the front door. 

"so, where are we going again? you didn't actually tell me”

he turned back to you, now waiting by his car for him to unlock it. the flash of the cars lights indicated he did, but he stopped you before you could open your own door. 

opening the door for you and helping you into it, even making show of clicking your seatbelt into place before he stole a kiss from you. 

"Tony, i told you. the Italian place with the wine list that's as long as your ego."

he mumbled out a ‘hey?!’ as he pulled back to meet your eyes, pouting again. 

giggling to yourself as he stood upright again, carefully shutting over your door and rounding the car to get into the drivers seat. 

"i don't have an ego," 

he said, feigning hurt before he continued. 

"i’m simply confident. there’s a difference."

shaking your head at him and leaning over to kiss him again, hands soothing across his chest and working off his tie before undoing his top button. 

a smirk working its way onto his face as he watched you, happily letting you do as you pleased. 

“looks better without the tie, less work-y and more ‘i’m going on a date with my hot girlfriend who i love very much’,”

you explained softly, to which he laughed. he agreed, wholeheartedly. 

you were his hot girlfriend who he loved very much, that he also planned to propose to later that night of course. 

⋆˚࿔ reblogs are highly appreciated 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

[rosemary-bells]

thanks for keeping our quarantine days sunny. it's always been a joy to have something to look forward to every day, and seeing it go is... surreal. it's sad, but... it was inevitable, right? and i honestly find a sort of serenity in that. memento mori. unus annus.

[kithtaehyung]

i know u did a drabble about this with tae, but how about dom’s pov of when it clicked that yoongi was the one oc was seeing? :0 (yeah this is because im high key in love with her)

drabble: what the…? series: 3tan | chapter: dalo rating/genre: pg ; 3tan au pov: dom wc: 661

-

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Taehyung? What is he doing here?

“Tae, is it Jimin?” 

Dom turns just in time to see you slap a hand over Yuri’s face, shaking her head at the loudmouth. Yuri gets her credit where it’s due, though. That girl will do anything to get to the bottom of something.

But what is Taehyung doing here? Honestly, this is more shocking than you hiding someone. 

Unless you invited him. Which is fair: you being here alone would definitely be strange since your brother is out of town.

Tae tilts his head when he arrives in front of everyone’s shoes. “What’d you say?”

Reia responds instead, “Is Jimin the one she’s seeing?”

Dom folds her lips to keep from laughing. Because the look on that man’s face is enough of an answer. 

It’s enough to almost break her, so she looks away instead. At you. 

Very, very intently watching something on the court. 

What are you...

Yoongi just passed to Jimin, and he made a shot. Maybe you are seeing Jimin? And Tae’s trying too hard to make it not seem that way?

Dom knows it isn’t Yoongi you’re seeing.

Because if it is, y’all are gonna talk.

But your voice saves Taehyung from blurting out whatever sass is coming, “How about we not talk about this?”

“But I wanna know,” Yuri says in her go-to pleading voice, which can escalate quick if she isn’t stopped, “We saw him pretty cozy with you just now.”

Alright, time to step in.

“Y’all, she said drop it. She’ll tell us when she’s ready.” 

“Dominique! You’re no fun.”

“So? I wouldn’t wanna be grilled like this.” 

It’s true. They’re going a little too hard for people saying they were happy for you seeing someone. 

When she sees you wordlessly thank her, the acknowledgement is just as silent. And the conversation quickly switches to another topic: Yuri’s man-that’s-not-really-her-man, as she calls it. 

Dom calls it bullshit, but that’s their business. They really should just date if both of them can’t seem to stop.

You’re watching the game really carefully again. What the hell?

When Dom follows your vision this time, what she sees on the other end makes her chest cave. 

Yoongi’s staring back at you.

Goddamn it, girl. 

Not him.

Quietly shaking her head, Dom thinks about what the hell to do. On one hand, you seem pretty damn fine. Happy, even. 

But on the other hand, whatever the fuck he did to Amari is something she still hasn’t forgotten. Or forgiven. 

She has to let you know. At least warn you if this is something serious. No way in hell is he gonna do the same thing to you.

“What are you doing here, Tae?”

Dom’s thoughts blink away as she also concentrates on Taehyung’s answer. 

He only shrugs. “I didn’t have any plans.”

Huh? Isn’t he the one that always has plans?

Then Reia asks you what you’re doing here, and Dom has to check her nails to keep her mouth shut. Fuck, you’re even looking at him while you’re lying! Girl! 

Dom quickly scans the court—ignoring the blatant staring from Yoongi while he wipes sweat during Yuri’s man’s freethrows—for a distraction. Damn, he really is fine as hell, but it doesn’t take away from his choices. 

Deciding how to save your ass again, she suddenly intervenes, “Yuri.” 

“Huh?”

“Look at your man at the line. Is he a fucking teapot?”

Everyone bursts into laughter—distracting the rest of the mostly quiet bleachers during the second freethrow—while Yuri’s jaw drops.

“Hey, now wait a second—”

“He reminds me more of a noodle.”

“I was thinking noodle, too!” 

“Y’all!” 

“Yuri, pick: are you team teapot or team noodle?”

“I’m leaving!” 

It seems to work like a charm yet again. Truly, you should be paying her at this point, but it’s all good. 

For the rest of the game, Dom keeps glancing your way.

And with every look, the absolute adoration in your eyes is both heartwarming and heartbreaking at the same time.

-

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A/N: DOMMMM I LOVE YOU. Let me know what y’all think!

[iibonniee]

Cherry Lip Gloss [Re-Write] (Im Changkyun)

Changkyun couldn’t help himself. He was drowning in the heartbreak and the only thing he could taste was her damn Cherry Lip Gloss.

Warnings: angst, heartbreak, smut (unprotected sex)

Word Count: 3.7k

Masterlist | Old version

The electric that easily flowed throughout the club was enough to keep the people in it alive and moving. The music that played loudly could almost be deafening if the people that danced their life away weren't focused on the buzzing feeling of getting drunk and enjoying the feeling of another's body against their own.

The club was buzzing with life, each second welcomed a new face ready to drink their night away and be filled with a familiar feeling of ecstasy as the night grew older and older ready to meet the greeting sun. A long day brought them here, and they were ready to face the consequences of a hangover when the time came. But for now, letting themselves go would be their main objective.

But the loud music mixed with the smell of arousal from the club-goers didn't seem to bother Changkyun once as he pushed his way through the crowd. The bar would be his favorite destination for the night.

Sharp brown eyes found a seat away from the rowdy crowd of men and women. A look of acknowledgment was shot between him and the female bartender who looked rather done with her shift. He knew what he needed and what he needed was something strong. So he voiced that to the girl as she lazily nodded her head.

Once the drink was in his hands, he turned his attention towards the crowd. It was easy to tell how many people stood on the dance floor. He ignored the flirtatious looks as his eyes kept scanning. Rather he ignored them all and kept his eyes on one single person as they did the same with him. Changkyun watched her movements carefully. Her movements matched the beat of the music almost perfectly, almost as if the girl dancing had practiced for this moment in particular.

Another sip of alcohol burned down his throat, but he gave no signs it did too much to bother him. Relaxing back against the bar, Changkyun could only note how inviting the girl looked dancing alone. It was almost an itch he wanted to scratch ever so desperately, but instead, he stayed by the bar playing with the rim of his shot glass as his brown eyes stared down the girl with mixed emotions.

He knew he shouldn’t do it. But he couldn’t help it. He knew it certainly wasn’t the alcohol talking. He drank merely a sip of it. He was already intoxicated by the mere thought of being in the same room as her.

Changkyun noted her skintight dress. The dress that fit her almost too perfectly. It seemed so new. It had Changkyun shift where he stood against the bar. Everyone around him was a seamless void. Only the girl on the dance floor was in his line of sight, her movement ever so flawless it had Changkyun itching for more, to feel more.

His skin tingled with unknown sensations. He craved for things he knew he shouldn’t have. But he wanted it. To reach for something that maybe could be dangerous, but to live for danger is what he would do if it meant achieving a toxic high. Something so toxic he knew it would be killer.

Changkyun couldn't recall when he downed the rest of his drink or when he moved to push himself through the bodies that grinded against each other to achieve one of the highs they were looking for. It felt like a hike to get to the single her, but once he was within reach the males hands wrapped around her waist pulling her back flush against his front.

The dress she wore was almost next to perfect in Changkyun’s eyes. The same color purple he had loved so much. His purple. It was almost too much for him to handle. Especially with the way his hands moved around her body, around her dress. It was smooth, the skin showing just the right amount of skin to make anyone go wild. Perhaps too much skin he started feeling a bit territorial.

Her presence alone was enough to fill his body with warmth. It wasn’t like the packed bodies did much. They were merely a void he’d have his mind push to the side so he could focus on her alone.

The feeling of her hands running through Changkyun’s hair was enough to let him hum out in content, but it was the feeling of her grinding against his body that drove him wild. Fingers against the silk of her dress had Changkyun’s mind on a fritz. He was barely holding himself together at the feeling of her body against his own.

Moving his hand up Changkyun caught her face turning it towards the left so he could catch her lips with his own. The taste of her cherry chapstick was enough to send Changkyun’s mind into a mess of foggy unknowns. He knew he’d be in that land for a long time.

The other hand continued to explore her body. Changkyun wanted to feel more. He needed to feel more. He wanted to know what her skin felt like against his own. He wasn't oblivious to the small whines that came from her. The music was loud, but not loud enough to hide those from the rapper.

When she turned her body around Changkyun’s hands were quick to pull her close lips connecting with hers. Now it was Changkyun’s turn to run his fingers through her h/c. Her hair was soft, surely driving the male into another state of a wild frenzy deep inside.

The moment Changkyun pulled away for some air he could only read one thing from the girl that stood right in front of him.

More.

Whether it was on purpose or accident, the soft cry that came from her when she fell onto the bed had Changkyun go crazy. Brown eyes watched as she propped herself up with a slight smirk on her face. Almost as if she knew what she did to him. Perhaps she did.

He knew she did.

Lips quickly met each other once more. This time there was no worry about where Changkyun could move his hands to. No worries that he'd expose something she didn't want to. Lips continued to fight against each other, the tongues fighting for an unnamed dominance. It was a perfect bliss that had both of them melting into a mess of ecstasy.

When their lungs cried for air Changkyun moved his lips from her own to her neck treating such like it was a canvas, and his lips were the paintbrush. The soft mewls and whimpers that came from the female below him had Changkyun wanting to rush. He knew there was more than just small cries. But Changkyun took his time marking up her neck as if it was the last thing the male could ever do.

Once satisfied with his work he pulled away immediately making eye contact with the panting girl. Her eyes were already half glossed over, lips were swollen from their little make-out session. But what Changkyun wanted to see was more. What she had hidden under the purple silk dress had been hidden from the male for far too long. He wanted to see more. To taste more.

Eyes flicked up for a moment to lock with hers to try and read what she wanted. It was almost a relief when he had read it so easily.

Make me yours.

Changkyun couldn't remember when he had taken (tore) the dress off the girl that laid in his bed. But seeing her fully exposed for him only had Changkyun’s breath hitch. It was surely a sight that Changkyun wanted to imprint in his mind forever.

Lips connected to her left breast quickly causing the girl above him to cry out in shock, the mewls and whines now something much more. Music to the males ears is more like. Alternating between the left and right breast with his lips, his hand would play with the breast that wasn't occupied with his lips.

Slowly Changkyun made his way down to the place where he wanted to be the whole night. Soft kisses peppered the girl's stomach often leaving small little bruises that'll have the girl remember this night for as long as they remained.

The smell of her arousal was enough for Changkyun’s mind to grow foggy within seconds. Such a sweet scent that he had hoped he wouldn't forget about.

Her legs were now spread open allowing him to do whatever he wanted to do to her. Teasingly he kissed the corners of her legs while brown eyes met hazy e/c. One lick parted her folds causing her to jerk in surprise and pleasure.

Changkyun was slowly getting off at the moans that emitted from her. The taste that came from her was too sweet, almost perfect. And he wanted more. To have his taste buds remember every sweet drop that her body gave him. His tongue continued to give love to her clit as he inserted a finger slowly gathering a rhythm.

Slowly, her moans turned into whines and praises. Her hands no longer grabbed at the sheets, rather they were now tangled within his hair grabbing and pulling. It didn't bother Changkyun for a moment. Instead, he enjoyed the feeling of it, and the moment it ended he knew he'd be lost.

Another finger was slid in causing the girl to cry out in pleasure. His tongue continued to include her clit while his fingers worked whatever magic they could. Changkyun knew she was close when her walls continued to clamp around his fingers. The whine that left the girl was quickly replaced with a cry of pleasure when his tongue entered inside her.

It didn't take long for her to cry out finding her release. The taste of her on Changkyun’s tongue drove the male wild. It was all he wanted to taste that whole night. Lapping up whatever was left, his lips began to leave more kisses wherever they could.

She allowed him to.

Her body glistened with sweat as his lips met her own once more, the soft moan bubbling from deep within her telling him that she enjoyed the taste left on his lips.

His hands were everywhere once more. His brain needed to remember every single little detail about her. The blocked whine told him that there was more she wanted, and who was he to throw away her want?

Pop.

The sound of their lips disconnecting from one another echoed throughout the room as he made a move to have their bodies fully meet. The unison of cries and please joined the forgotten sound. And soon the sound of the bed rocking and skin meeting was what filled the room.

Her moans were like music to his ears once more. A song so beautiful it would put his own music to shame if it were to ever meet the light of day. But he couldn’t allow it to happen for he knew he was too possessive to allow such to happen.

Fingers clasped together as her legs wrapped around his waist urging him with unspoken words to go deeper. So, he did. Deeper. Faster. He gave her his all.

Just for her.

He knew she was close. She squeezed around him tightly. And for the first time he hated it, but he couldn’t stop himself from chanting “cum around my cock baby girl” over and over like a soft cry hoping that she’d fulfill his dream.

She did.

Her cries were much louder than her moans thanks to the added pressure when his hands snuck down to give her abounded clit some love. He knew he was close. He was sloppy, and her own mixed words of “cum in me. Make me yours” filled the air over his own cries and pleas.

He couldn’t help it. He couldn’t control himself. It was too much. He listened to her. His own cum filling her up as his thrusts never seemed to let up. Not even for a second as he chanted out “mine mine mine” like a prayer.

He knew it wasn’t true. Not even when he fell beside her holding her close. And certainly not when he woke up to an empty bed and the birds chirping. He knew he shouldn’t have been disappointed. But the choked-up sob that left his lips told his heart that he once again wanted to get drunk and forget what happened.

A mistake that he had hoped would fix something. She wouldn’t stay. Not even if he got down on his knees and begged her to. He hated how easily he fell for her charms. Just like the day he fell in love with her. He knew the games she was playing.

She was toying with his emotions. Just like the day she walked out the door after their ugly argument. Just like the day she posted a picture with another man. Just like last night wearing that damned purple dress.

The tears were fresh reminders that the hanging bandages around his heart were torn open. It hurt. Hurt hurt hurt hurt. And all he could do was cry. Soft silent sobs wracking and shaking his body so much that it hurt. And not even curling up into a pitied ball would help ease the pain.

He needed her. The person that held the supply of air. And she took it and left without even looking back. That same four lettered word rang in his mind. But how could he forget it was his fault she left.

He was busy. He forgot. He became careless.

“I wouldn’t care if you left! I could have anyone!”

It made him sick knowing he didn’t feel the tasteful alcohol. Rather it was his own angered sober thoughts that voiced it. The only time he regretted his words was when she slammed the door behind her and blocked his number.

He lied to her. He couldn’t have anyone. The fame was too much. He needed her. He needed her to feel normal. To not be I.M of Monsta X. No. To be Changkyun that had his heart loved.

But it was too damaged it hurt. Everything fucking hurt.

***

He knew he should care.

His phone went off like a madman and he couldn’t find himself caring one bit. He was unmoving from where he sat. He couldn’t remember when he carried his body to his dorm room, nor could he remember anything other than what happened the night prior. Her body was all he could remember.

He was stuck. Motionless. Spiraling into the depths of emptiness and he knew he wouldn’t find his way out for a long time. So why should he care? Why should he give a damn about the world when it seemed to not want to care about him? Why was it so easy to hold onto something that didn’t want him back?

He wanted to scream, but when he opened his mouth, nothing came out. Nothing more but another pitiful cry. How had he not noticed the prickling tears that welled in his eyes like a dam ready to break? Then it broke. The ugly tears that crashed down his face ready to find a home on the ground below.

His body was shaking. When did that start? When did the hysterics start? Why did she do this to him? Why couldn’t he move on? Why couldn’t he breathe? Why why why?

He screamed.

A cry of agony that was held for no one but the pain he caused himself. He did this to himself. The scars forever there and unfading. It was unfair. Life was unfair. But he did this to himself. He could only blame himself.

Why did he let himself slip? Why couldn’t he stay home? Why couldn’t he just ask Minhyuk or maybe his closest friend Jooheon for some cheering up? And why the hell was someone blowing up his phone?

The same amount of why’s that drove a headache into his head and a heavy heart that cracked more.

He sat on his floor bawled and bare. His heart was out there that was soaked in the tears of his heartbreak. And all he could remember was the damn cherry lip gloss that stole his heart.

Who was touching him? Why was he having a panic attack? And why was he hearing the voice of the woman that left while he was asleep?

He was hyperventilating. Freaking out while clawing at his chest gasping for air that tried to fill blocked lungs. Everything hurt. His mind played too many games with him, and he certainly felt dizzy.

“Changkyun.” A voice so soft broke his heavy and intoxicating thoughts.

No.

This wasn’t real. It couldn’t. Why couldn’t he tear his eyes away from the floor. Because he knew his mind was playing games on him. Taking advantage of his broken heart. So it was to no surprise that when he did look up the only thing that stared back at him was the emptiness of his room.

There at the door stood someone he didn’t want. He wasn’t her. So why was Kihyun’s pitiful look eating away at him? Why did it hurt so much? His mouth was moving. Kihyun was talking. Blabbing away at god knows what.

“Why were you late? Why didn’t you answer? Where were you last night? Why were you slamming the doors when you came in last night? Didn’t you see that Jooheon was calling you? Hello, do you know I’m talking to you? Why are you ignoring me—?”

His questions seemed attacking, unbarring and annoying. His head was pounding. The tears were undying and painful. Why wouldn’t they stop?

“— Changkyun?” Kihyun’s voice broke through the tough wall that desperately blocked the world out. Reddened eyes filled with pain and sorrow snapped up in hopes for an escape. But nothing came. “We’re worried about you. Did you see her again?”

Kihyun knew. Kihyun knew of his fall. The fall that led him into hoping there would be a change at the end of the night. His heart that sat hopeful and half patched was shoved to break the moment of her silent departure.

And god did it hurt.

How disgustingly hopeful he was never changed the fact that she was glad and happy to leave. And it hurt. Hurt hurt hurt.

He couldn’t answer. He couldn’t even open his mouth for another choked up sob fell just like his body did into the arms of the older member. Kihyun wasn’t her. His hold was comforting like hers. But he couldn’t handle the sad and worried stares that came from Kihyun.

He was laid open and bare for his friend. So exposed as if his skin was nothing. He could barely hear the muffled whispers of the others. When did they get here? Would they be a bother? Why do they care?

At the end of the day, it was all his fucking fault.

***

“Changkyun, please eat.” Once again Kihyun’s voice broke the harsh thoughts that plagued Changkyun’s mind. So cruel and ugly tearing apart his mind.

His eyes flick up glancing between the male that had just spoken and the two beside him, Minhyuk and Hyungwon. Their gazes sat worried, questioning. It made him sick. How could they care for him when he was in the middle of losing himself? He was losing his mind.

“I’m not hungry.” His words only seemed to bother the older male. But he didn’t care. He was busy trying not to suffocate. It was hard, bothersome, and tiring. If she wasn’t by his side, then he’d rather face death. That would be more beautiful than walking around with a forced fake happiness and smile.

Ding.

When did reality seem to kick in? To break him away from the shadow that ate him whole. He blinked, looking around at the other people. They were happy, laughing and smiling. He longed for that. Longed for the simple touch of being happy.

Then he saw it. Saw her. Her smile was genuine. The same damn smile she once held for him and only him. Who was she with? Why was she here? Has she noticed him? Why didn’t she see him? Who was making her smile like that?

The world seemed to drown itself out. Just like the night before when he locked eyes on her at the club. But this time she refused to meet his gaze. It was bothersome, annoying, and irritating. Why was she acting irrational? Why couldn’t she love him?

It was easy to ignore the cries of his members. The cries telling him to stop, to think this through before something bad happens. But he didn’t care. He couldn’t care.

“Why aren’t you coming back to me? I called. You blocked my number? Why did you lead me on last night? W-Why are you with another guy? Why did you let me fuck you like we were together Y/N-“

The questions came out fast and unstopping. He was drunk on the heartbreak and the only person who held answers was the person who sat just inches away, her brows furrowed with brewing anger as the male that sat across from her held a red and flushed face.

“Changkyun—“

“No.” He hiccupped stopping her in her tracks. His hand slammed down on the table telling the other that he wasn’t backing down. “Tell me right now that you love me. That we can fix this mess. I can’t breathe without you-“

“Changkyun, stop it.” She hissed, done with his bullshit and done with the attention he was drawing in. “There is no fixing this mess. Last night was a mistake. A drunken one at that. You broke me first! You can deal with the damage that comes after. I don’t want you near me again and I sure as hell don’t want you in my life.”

No no no.

He couldn’t watch her leave. But yet he stood unmoving watching as she stood up and walked away. Out of his life. All because he was stupid. All because he fell in love and was scared. He fell for her and was still falling despite her not caring anymore.

All because he loved the taste of her damn cherry lip gloss. And he simply couldn’t let her go. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever.

[shivada-jade]

soulmates! (2)

soulmate!au BECAUSE IM WEAK. YOU'RE WEAK TOO.

characters: ganyu, kaeya, thoma ➡ mentions: cloud retainer, ningguang, adelinde, diluc, crepus, rosaria, traveler warning(s): like- just one swear

part one: (bennett, zhongli, diluc)

ganyu: can see footprints where soulmate has recently stepped on. if followed, they will be lead to their soulmate. sort of like "hot and cold" cold if you're far and hot if you're close

she knew she is a very busy person. she surprises herself when she asked ningguang for a day off.

"you want a day off?" she remembers ningguang's composed face deteriorate and herself doing the same thing.

ningguang let her rest for two weeks even if ganyu had only requested one. now she has so much free time.

the first thing she did was sleep, but she couldn't- not when she spots purple footprints.

as part adeptus with one heck of a good eyesight, she always assumes that the footprints on the ground are because of her eyesight, but cloud retainer says otherwise.

"child, you have a soulmate system of which," the old bird starts. "where one has the ability see where one's soulmate has been, and if they've been there recently."

blue footprints that fade away means her soulmate had left a long time ago. red-ish-orange footprints mean that her soulmate is very close by, but it's never been that colour in her eyes.

ganyu strolls along the grassy plains of liyue, admiring all the sweet flowers. she lightly touches her horns, a habit she got from being awoken from naps on a field of sweet flowers.

the footprints were purple, which is the closest to red ganyu had ever gotten. blue is the colour she always sees like her vision, her hair, the waters of liyue, and the glazed lilies.

the purple is also as beautiful.

"fate will bring two together at the right moment. thou need not rush." ganyu can hear cloud retainer say, so she didn't run after the footprints.

the half-adepti thrums her fingers on her leg, unsure what to do with all the free time given to her. she supposes she can head back to liyue and have tea with madame ping.

meeting madame ping confuses ganyu. the elderly woman keeps asking of her soulmate system and if she's met them.

"ganyu, have you met them?"

"ganyu, why not chase after them?"

"ganyu, ganyu ganyu-"

ganyu politely sets her teacup down, "i have yet to find them."

madame ping chuckles in her elderly woman way, like those smug elderly women who know more than others but will act clueless to amuse them.

"you know, i have a special gift, some speculate it as a curse, but i think it's wonderful," she said, pouring more tea for ganyu. "i have the ability to see red strings that connect soulmates. i can connect, i can break connections, but i can't see my own."

ganyu frowns slightly, "have you met yours?"

"no, but it makes me happy seeing the strings connect with people," she blows on her tea to make it cooler and turns her head to avoid looking at ganyu.

"madame ping, why-"

"you," a person behind ganyu seethes.

meekly, ganyu turns around and finds someone glaring at her. "may i help you?"

"ganyu, right? why do you always walk so fucking fast. i can never catch up to you when i see your footprints, and you're always going from place to place. one moment you're in liyue, the next your in somewhere like fontaine or something. it's like you're spiderman."

ganyu's jaw goes slack, "you're my soulmate?" she looks at the ground, seeing red footprints of where her soulmate had just walked. she now understand why madame ping kept asking her about her soulmate, because madame ping knew her soulmate was going to meet her.

ganyu clears her thoat, standing up to offer her soulmate a seat, "would you like to join us for tea?"

her soulmate blinks, and looks at the tea set then back to ganyu, "sorry, i didn't mean to intrude your tea party. i'm [name]."

"hello, i'm madame ping," the woman speaks "and your soulmate is ganyu. have tea."

ganyu stifles a laugh and sits on a chair next to her soulmate. "i apologize for walking too fast."

kaeya: he hears what his soulmate sings

at first kaeya thought he was going crazy when he kept hearing music in his head.

"dad!" he cried, forcingly rubbing away the tears that fell down his cheeks. the kids near the winery had come over and played with him and diluc, and that was when the first notes started. it never bothered him. he brushed it off until it became a full sound of a voice and a song.

not understanding scared kaeya to death. he always knew something, but this is the first where he doesn't know. he felt like he was going insane with this voice in his head, singing in his head; a voice that wasn't his.

"dad!" he called out again more desperately. diluc held him by his side, worried for his brother.

"father!" dliuc called this time, "father, kaeya's feeling sick."

diluc brought in kaeya, rubbing his back in attempt to comfort him. he saw adelinde and waved to her.

adelinde gasped when she spotted the blue-haired boy sobbing. she dropped her feather duster on the shelf she was dusting and dropped herself next to kaeya, inspecting of there were any wounds on his skin.

"kaeya, dear. what's the matter?" she quietly tells diluc to get his father in the wine cellar and gently pushed kaeya to take a seat near the fireplace.

diluc silently obeyed and ran, unlocking the door that led to his father.

kaeya hiccupped, unable to form words.

adelinde hushed him. her motherly fingers soothed his head, "what's wrong? breathe with me, dear. just until your father gets back."

she inhaled and exhaled in a steady manner for kaeya to follow. the boy shakily did the same. he did it a few more times, inhaling and exhaling slowly with adelinde. he calmed down. the crying stopped and his breathing was normal again. adelinde took this as another chance to ask him what's wrong.

"are you ready to tell me?"

kaeya blinked the tears off and gripped his clothes to stop himself from crying again. "it's happening again. i- i don't understand miss adelinde."

adelinde placed a hand over kaeya's for him to know she was listening. "what don't you understand?"

"i keep hearing things. i always hear a voice that isn't mine in my head-" kaeya sputtered.

diluc and crepus open the door from the cellar. crepus' face etched with worry when he spotted kaeya crying to adelinde. diluc had told him as much as he could but all the information he gathered was kaeya started covering his ears and crying.

"-all the voice does is sing and sing. i don't even like some of the songs it sings! i don't- i don't know," kaeya stammered, not noticing the two others that joined. "i don't know what happening to me. i'm scared."

crepus smiled at adelinde and nodded to her, signaling that he can handle it from here. adelinde gave a grateful nod and brushed herself off the floor to continue her duties.

"my boy," crepus smiles, kneeling in front kaeya to see him better. he brushed his face with a thumb and hugged him. crepus chuckled when kaeya hugged him tighter.

"my boy," the man continued with a knowing smile on his face. "that's your soulmate system. you can hear them singing if they sing as they can hear you singing when you sing."

kaeya lets go from crepus' hold and sniffled his tears away, "what? but isn't a soulmate system when things fall on you?"

diluc from the back of the room silently listened in, also confused as kaeya. didn't everyone have the same soulmate system?

crepus pats kaeya's shoulders, "we all have different ways to know who our soulmate is. yours and diluc's soul systems are different from everyone."

"master crepus is right." adelinde piped in while dusting off the dust on the shelves. "my soulmate system is a countdown to when i'll meet them."

kaeya looked at the woman shocked, "so not everyone has things falling on them?"

"correct." crepus raved, "but unlike diluc's soul system, instead of things falling on me, it appears on my hand for my soulmate system."

diluc eyes his brother, picking up a stray book on a chair and handed it to adelinde to help her.

kaeya pulled a cheeky grin and pointed to diluc, "diluc's eavesdropping."

the said boy gasped and turned his body around to make it look like he was doing something busy.

crepus bellows a laugh, "so what song is your soulmate singing?"

...

to be frank, kaeya had no idea what his soulmate sang that day. it was random words jumbled together. in fact, most things his soulmate sings are songs he has never heard before. it progressed from simple tunes, but now kaeya feels like his soulmate might be a song composer.

when he was younger he'd brag to diluc saying "my soulmate sings so well! what does your soulmate sound like, hah!"

to which diluc would respond with

he grins, swirling his wine around the glass as he watches a stack of papers hit diluc's face while bar tending on the first floor. kaeya clinks his glass on the table, watching people enter and leave the tavern from above.

today, his soulmate sings a song he's heard of.

'the wellerman,' and judging from the pauses and missing lyrics, kaeya safely assumes his soulmate was singing a duet with someone.

"soon may the wellerman come, to bring us sugar and tea and rum!"

kaeya hums the next few notes, never singing. after hearing his soulmate sing for the first time, his thought was to never sing- not when his soulmate could be a billionaire for singing with their voice.

only on occasions he would sing to let his soulmate know he was there.

he finishes the last sip of his wine and descends down the tavern stairs, raising a hand to acknowledge rosaria drinking in the corner. he airily chuckles, seeing diluc scrunch his eyes at the papers in front of him instead of looking at kaeya.

kaeya pushes the door open, humming along to the song his soulmate sings. he strolls by the alleyways, waving a hello to flora and a couple dogs that bark at his feet, scratching behind its ears.

he hears a bard singing at the plaza and saunters towards the music, climbing up the stairs and his frame almost freezes when seeing someone acting out to the song playing in his head.

good hunter's table tips over with a person on it. they land smoothly to the ground with a grin while singing with a resident bard.

"one day when the tonguing is done, we'll take our leave and go," they sing with so much melody and soul. the bard in green rumbles with cheer, raising his hands and dancing with the other with an arm latched around another.

kaeya watches, mesmerized by the singing and clapping around the plaza. he claps along and laughs when the bard drags his friend up to the walls of the fountain, singing louder.

the makes eye contact with the singer and waves. the singer waves back, unaware of what kaeya now knows.

soulmates.

he clued the pieces together and admired his soulmate from a distance, not wanting to disturb the performance.

"she'd not been two weeks from shore, when down on her a right whale bore!" the bard sings in glee.

kaeya quietly sings the next part, blending with the crowd. the whoops and cheers grow louder, chanting for his soulmate to sing the part kaeya sand under his breath, but to his surprise his soulmate tenses.

"WAIT! stop!" they hush the crowd with a hand and confuse everyone, "my soulmate's singing! but they're a bit too quiet. they never sing so shh, this is rare!"

the people murmur, watching kaeya's soulmate covering their ears to hear him clearer. kaeya grins, taking this opportunity to sing out loud.

"soon may the wellerman come to bring us sugar and tea and rum!" kaeya waltzes in front of the people who create a pathway for him.

his soulmate's eyes snap to him and he steps up next to them, standing on the fountain. the bard grins, and cheers. the crowd follows his cheer, watching their cavalry captain sing to his soulmate.

kaeya takes his soulmate's hand and presses a kiss on the back, "hello darling, i'm kaeya."

his soulmate doesn't hear him talking, no. they hear music when he speaks. though, kaeya's introduction threw them off, who's to say they couldn't return the gesture.

"a pleasure to meet you at last," they place a hand over their forehead for drama. they grin taking kaeya's waist closer to them and whisper in his ear, "you have a marvelous voice."

mondstadt had never seen kaeya at loss for words and a blush rising his face.

thoma: you taste the same things your soulmate tastes, no matter how strange- even when you're already eating something else

for most times, you were envious of your soulmate for eating the most lavishing food- food only one with money can get. you so desperately wanted to try the food they ate.

you didn't know what they ate, but only knew of the taste. sometimes it clashes with what you eat, like one time you ate an orange while your soulmate started toothbrushing. it wasn't very pleasant to say the least.

you were minding yourself, gathering food for your dinner until you taste something horrible.

wtf is my soulmate eating

it is a vile taste on your tongue, and no amount of water can wash the taste off. you try rinsing it, you tried eating something with a stronger taste, but no matter what, the thing your soulmate ate just stays there. it's disgusting.

you buy anything sour to un-taste what you tasted, and it still doesn't work. walking nearby a tea house, you see a man of blonde, clutching his stomach and laughing at a traveler from afar. call it fate, because it probably is, you know by the second he says his stomach hurts, he is your soulmate.

you point at him with a pointed glare, "what on earth did you EAT?!"

you take a bite of a sliced purple melon in your hand and the man in front of you widens his jade eyes, noting the food you're eating and the blooming taste on his tongue. the traveler next to him knits their brows, looking between you and their friend.

"thoma," the traveler calls. "who's this?"

thoma looks at you apologetically and sheepishly rubs the nape of his neck. "hey? i did it to win a contest... i couldn't let my pride down." he pauses, looking at you, "forgive me?"

you wanted to throw a punch on him, but you knew he had it worse with a bad aftertaste and a stomach ache.

you sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose. and place a mischievous grin, "take me on a date with food that's actually good, and then i'll think about forgiving you."

[introloves]

i was rly soft for aone this morning so here’s something from that softness;

a continuation of this post.

— aone fucks u doggy style in the bathroom of his childhood home + size kink + fluff + aone kinda doms u + aone can’t say no to his small gf + f! reader

— word count: approx 1.6k

it felt like you could hardly breath against the chilly night air. even with someone as warm and big as aone next to you, his body constantly radiating heat, you still shivered.

his hand gripped yours in comfort, he knew you were nervous, knew this was a big deal to you and knew you wanted to make a good impression with his parents.

“ready?” he murmured, and you nodded.

it was time to get this over with.

he knocked on the door and within seconds it was pulled open.

both aones parents were standing there, towering over you with the kindest smiles you had ever seen.

fuck, no wonder he was so tall.

his mom greeted you with a kind bow, and warm handshake, his father did the same.

it was quite comical in the way you stood out against them, both his mom and dad were tall, his mom looked strong, but kind. his dad held the same glare he did, which was often mistaken by others as a mean scowl, but as the night progressed you quickly realized his heart was just as big as your takanobu’s.

he had been extra attentive to you, making sure you were comfortable at all times. your heart pounded at the way he took care of you, he looked at you with such a tender gaze and his hand hadn’t left yours all night.

they were tough, pale and massive, the text book definition of working hands, but they held yours with care, treating you as if you were something precious, the most valuable thing in his world.

maybe the tenderness of it all was why you were suddenly pushing him into the bathroom.

much to your dismay, the way he had cared for you all night had brought a sinister idea into your head, pure lust and the hot pounding between your legs drove you to wanting to immediately fuck your boyfriend.

you had excused the both of you from the dinner table, pretending the food had settled in your tummy wrong.

once inside, you turned to look up at aone.

his face was one of someone who was deeply concerned, to him, he actually thought something was wrong.

but the thought quickly died in his head as you brought a hand to the front of his pants.

“what are you-“ his deep voice vibrated nicely with the acoustics in the bathroom.

“im sorry, i’m so sorry, but i’m wet and I need you right now.” you begged.

aone swallowed thickly at your desperation. his hand quickly tightened down on your wrist,

“you’re not ill?” he questioned, you shook your head.

“you’re just horny.”

you nodded.

he couldn’t believe you, it had been a perfectly normal night so far, what had set you off?

“we can’t.” he hissed as you wiggled your arm free, coming back to paw at the front of his jeans.

“yes we can, just fuck me quick and i’ll be fine for the rest of the night.”

it didn’t make any sense, but you needed him now. your lust idled brain had taken over, you felt like you’d die if you didn’t see his dick in the next couple minutes.

the better part of aone knew this wasn’t a good idea, but he was such a weak man when it came to you. with a sigh of exasperation, he grabbed at your arms, hauling you to him.

he pressed you against him in a hug, leaning down to nose at your neck.

“fine.”

with a noise of happiness you hooked your hands around his neck and began a heated kiss.

as soon as his body pressed against you, your hips began grinding against him, whimpering into his mouth.

aone pulled away, tensing at the way you whined and chased his mouth.

“it has to be fast.”

he quickly moved you, twirling you around, his leg spreading you to make accommodation for his broad body.

you couldn’t breathe as he crushed you against the sink, finally giving you what you wanted.

he pushed your skirt up and over your ass, making sure to keep it bunched in a place where it wasn’t going to get dirty.

he wanted to kneel down and give your cunt a nice lick but with how small the bathroom was he knew he couldn’t. so he instead brought one hand to your front, the other splayed across your upper back and pushed you down.

you immediately gripped onto the sink, thighs squeezing close as he deftly worked at your clit. but you stopped him, he would usually take his time to prep you, but you needed him now.

“please, just fuck me. i’ll be fine.” you whined.

“dirty.” he groaned at your desperation, you nodded in acknowledgment. you knew it was, you were dirty for asking him to fuck you in the bathroom of the house he grew up in, it was filthy the way you begged for his cock while his parents were in the house.

but the shame did little to stop your pussy from clenching out wave after wave of arousal.

he slid in deliciously, no prep needed with the way you were soaking.

you squealed as he began mercilessly pounding into you.

this was what you wanted, wasn’t it? he wondered, and seeing the way you pushed your hips back against him, clenched your pussy /tight/ against him, he knew the answer.

“f-ffuck.” you wheezed, loving the way he was taking you. your hand trailed down your body to reach between your legs, picking up where aone had left off to draw tight circles against your clit. you wanted to cum so bad, so bad.

with your fingers rubbing at your clit, and aone jackhammering into you, it felt like your moans and slurs of pleasure were getting away from you.

his eyes widened at the increase in volume, before he could really think it through, he clamped his hand over your mouth.

he was a bit worried at the force he had brought his hand up, panicked at the thought of his parents hearing what you two were really doing.

his hips faltered just a bit to make sure you were okay, but looking at you in the mirror, your eyes rolled back, drool panting the inside of his palm, he knew you loved it.

in a moment of boldness, he slipped two of his fingers inside your mouth, trying to keep it busy in attempt to quiet you.

you took to it fast, immediately suckling at his index and middle finger.

god, you were so nasty by getting off on the way his fingers roughly pushed down against your tongue.

you stood desperately on your tippy toes to arch harder against him. the way his hips slapped up against yours made it sound like some sort of machine was plowing into you, but it was simply from the strength of his hips.

if the sound of your unabashed moaning didn’t give away what you two were doing, the sound of his body slapping against yours would.

you were so close, you wanted to let him know how good he was doing, but his fingers were still hooked inside your mouth.

instead you came wordlessly, creaming all over aones dick.

the desperation in your pants increased as he pulsed heavily inside you. you squeezing against him this good spurred him to finish too, your small shaking body against him couldn’t handle the cum he was pumping into you. with each squeeze around, it seeped down your legs, painting his pubes, and thighs with it.

“pretty.” you heard aone say from behind you, bringing you back from the dazed fuck he just gave you.

looking at the mirror, you saw his gaze directed at the mess between both your connected bodies.

it took the both of you some time to get straightened out, now that you were stuffed full with cum, happy and satiated, you prayed to whatever god out there that his parents hadn’t heard.

Aone took the first step out, his hand reaching behind to interlock his hand with yours.

you hadn’t noticed how hard he had fucked you until you were padding down the hallway back to the kitchen table, your legs shook and the rawness between your legs had you walking very funny.

he looked back at you, mortified by the wobble in your step.

you two made it back, only to find the kitchen table empty.

Aone called out to his mom and dad, checking the kitchen but finding it completely empty.

“c-check your phone.”

as he did he sighed out something that sounded like relief, he flipped it over to you, showing you a message that said they had gone out some time ago to find you tummy medicine.

you laughed in relief, gently sitting down on one of the kitchen chairs.

his reddened face still bright as ever, relaxed a bit at the news.

you motioned for him to hug you, arms outstretched. he quickly bent down to pick you up, lifting him against you.

“take me to your childhood room.” you whispered, he once again tensed up at the tone of your voice.

“no.” he quickly shot you down.

“whyyyyyy.”

“no, you were waking funny.”

“but i can take it I swear!”

and just like before, aone, weak to your words, carried you to his old bedroom.

[strawberry-lemonade-kisses]

You and her

MUGEN TRAIN SPOILERS, read at your own risk.

You shuffled around the front yard, hanging the still soaked laundry up to dry with the help of your brother in law, Senjuro. You were so grateful he was so willing to stay with you while Kyojuro was away. As time went on simple tasks around the house became hard to manage with your growing baby bump. 

"Y/N? Maybe you should leave the rest to me and go relax for a while. You already did the washing and made breakfast" Senjuro hovered next to you, grabbing at the blanket you were trying to take down.  He was so much like his brother, so Doting and careful with you. You were sure Kyojuro had asked him to take extra care of you before he left for his work. But maybe he had a point, your back had been hurting more recently and Shinobu had warned you about overexerting yourself this far along. 

"You are right, maybe I should. Do you want tea?" Allowing Senjuro to remove the blanket from your grasp, you stepped back from the basket of clean linens. He hummed as he turned towards the clothing line. 

"Yes, and maybe after tea we can write to Kyojuro" he smiled over at you as you nodded. You still hadn't sat down to write a reply to your husband's recent letter. Telling of his time investigating a suspicious train. Before he left they didn't know much and so far it seems he hadn't found anything yet. It looked like you wouldn't be seeing him for another week or two. 

"Let's do that. I'm sure he would love to hear what Tengen and the girls brought over the other day" you made your way back towards the house, going straight to the kitchen to prepare tea and maybe wash some of the fruit tengen and his wife's had brought armfuls of the other day. 

"I was told it helps babies stay healthy. So we brought a lot, make sure you eat lots okay?" Tengen passed along his information whole he stored away your abundance of fruits in the kitchen, refusing any of your help. He waved you off with a huff, kicking you out of your own kitchen and grumbling about letting him 'do the hard work' 

The tea pot was steadily puffing out steam by the time you had arranged a plate of apples, grapes, and oranges. A nice, decadent arrangement for such a nice summer day. You were grateful to have someone to spend time with during such a nice day. Maybe, you could go into town later, buy Senjuro something nice as a thank you for all his help. He mentioned something about a new haori, a nice white one like the older one Kyojuro had.

“Y/N?” You were pulled from your thoughts with Senjuros solemn face, standing towards the doorway. “There’s Kakushi here asking for you” Your eyes widened at the sentence, unsure how to proceed. Senjuro shuffled awkwardly as you stood there, frozen in fear. A visit like this was  never a good sign, something happened, something was wrong. If it was a minor injury Kaname would tell you, not the Kakushi. “Y/N?” he called again, his timid voice breaking through the trance you felt yourself in. Humming in acknowledgement you wiped the juice off your hands, placing the towel back on the counter before you went to the front of the house.

“Mrs. Rengoku?” The woman in the black uniform addressed you, kneeling on the ground as she looked up at you. You nodded, waiving for her to continue, she cleared her throat, taking a piece of paper from her pocket, she read it aloud. “At 6:45 this morning we received a call for emergency medical care on The Flame Hashira, Kyojuro Rengoku. After the battle of lower moon 1 on the Mugen train the surviving flame hashira alongside 3 Mizunoto, Tanjiro Kamado, Zenitsu Agatsuma, and Inosuke Hashibira were approached by the upper moon 3. The flame hashira single handedly fought the upper moon 3.” She paused, looking up from the piece of paper anxiously. You grabbed onto Senjuros shoulder as he stood next to you, looking up at you. “Upon arrival Kyojuro Rengoku was unresponsive. Pronounced dead at 6:55.” She bowed her head, folding herself in half as she lowered herself to the ground. You felt dizzy, the tears immediately pushing out as her words hit you. They traveled fast, each syllable feeling like a weight on your shoulder, pushing you down as you sank to your knees. Cries ripped through your throat, tearing their way up as they escaped you. Senjuro clung to you desperately, wrapping his arms around your shoulders as he sank down next to you, tears wetting the shoulder of your kimono.

“Miss Rengoku, We are so sorry. Working with Kyojuro has been an honor. They will be by with him shortly so you can say your final goodbyes.” The woman spoke hesitantly, wiping the tears from her eyes as she gave a final bow. You couldn’t see through the flood of tears in your eyes, the never ending stream of salted water that flowed down your face. 

It seemed like forever before you stopped crying. Your throat hurt from your cries, the anguish that had escaped you in your grief. Senjuro had cried himself to sleep, his hands still clinging to your kimono as you both sat on the engawa. Although your cris had stopped, the tears didn’t. A steady stream still ran down your face as you went over your memories, memories that won't be made anymore

"My heart burns for you Kyojuro. The blood that runs through my veins, the blood that keeps me going. It runs just so I can go back to you. You are my flame, brightening the dark night, lighting my way. I never want you to be blown out, I will protect you in every way that I can, I will shield you from the winds and cover you from the rains. Kyo, my flame" you pushed his bangs away from his face, peppering kisses along his jaw as you spoke to him. You hear him exhale softly beneath you, his grip on your hips loosening as he relaxes. 

"You drive me wild, my sunflower, you must be trying to get me to stay.” He huffed “I wish I could stay here with the two of you forever, I would want to carry you both everywhere with me, not letting even a hair of yours touch the ground. Leave it to me, sunflower, I will do it. Once she's born, I'll do it.” You hummed in response, leaning back in his arms. Your hands still cupped his face as you looked down at him, his gentle gaze as he stared down at your large stomach. 

"Come home quickly. She will be ready to meet you when you get back. She will miss you as much as I will" he nodded, a smile gracing his lips as he pulled you into his chest, calloused hands resting on your back. 

"I will be home quicker than lightning for you, my love. You and her" He pulled back, leaving a chaste kiss on your head. “I must go though, the sooner I leave, the sooner I will be home” You got up from straddling him, hands never leaving his body as you climbed off. He rose after you, grabbing onto his small amount of belongings he usually took with him. His sword rattled as he moved, the metallic hum vibrated through your small home. “Don’t forget your snacks” You waddled to the kitchen, hand already supporting your back as you moved with the weight of your baby. He was already standing in the front doorway, looking out at the early morning fog that blanketed your yard when you returned to his side, holding the small box of fruit and sweet potatoes. A travel snack you always made for him. He looked over at you, a smile gracing his lips as he took the wrapped box.

“Thank you my dear” He leaned forward, pulling you into him with his free hand as he moved against your lips. The kiss didn’t seem to last long enough for you, a small sigh leaving your lips as he pulled away, making his way down the front steps.

“Be safe, my flame. Come back quickly” With a wink and a wave he disappeared into the fog.

His words rang in your head, a reminder of his promise. The gentle words you said to each other before he left. If you would have known it was the last time, maybe you would have done it differently. Maybe you would have given him a whole meal for the road instead of small snacks. Maybe you would have convinced him to stay this time. Maybe if you had done something different, then maybe he’d still be here.

“Y/N” You looked down at the boy in your arms, his voice hoarse from crying. You wiped the snot off his face with your sleeve, pushing his bangs out of his damp eyes.  

“I know Senjuro, I know. I’m sorry sweetie. Thank you for staying with me so much” His grip on you tightened, his head falling back onto your shoulder as he let out another cry.

A/N - im sorry if the ending sucks, i was crying to much to finish it like a proper story. Anyways, sorry about your feelings

[fa-headhoncho]

Untitled TFATWS Fic: Part 3

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Prompt/Background: After turning yourself in to the government following the events of CA:TWS, they lock you up for the crimes you committed during your time at Hydra. Spending years there until Captain America got you on parole during the blip to help fight Thanos. Now, after doing community service acts and helping the broken society, when they give the new Captain America the shield, you’re thrown back into a life you didn’t want.

Word Count: 2058

Reader: Female

Warning: parole officers? canon level violence, john walker

Author’s Note: im being lazy and not writing rn but i have a stock pile of fics so get ready for shitty posts :p

Masterlist

Part 1 Part 2 Part 4

=====

Once you get onto the plane, you don’t hold back your emotions. The fight was enough but how Walker talked to Sam and Bucky on the car ride over sent you over the edge. You had to admit, the kid had good intentions but there was something about him that was off.

You don’t even wait for his private jet to lift off before turning to him and pinning him against the nearest wall. Your forearm was laying across his chest while the other was hovering over the knife clipped onto your hip. His managers and friend stand up, rushing to try to pry you off of him but he raises a hand to stop them. “Who the hell do you think you fucking are, huh?”

“Captain America.” He simply responds, looking at down you with a cocky smile. You let out a scoff, the audacity of this man. “Look, I didn’t know that you knew them.”

“Yes, you did.” You exclaim while your forearm digs into his chest, “You read my parole reports, it shows where I spend my time and who I talk to, Bucky and Sam being the main two who I interact with. They’re my friends and you’re using me as a pawn. Steve wouldn’t have done that, Captain America wouldn’t have done that.”

“You talk about looking up to him but you’re nothing like him. You throw around ‘brother’ like it means nothing, you have no idea what those two have gone through with Steve. You hold the shield like it’s a toy and using it to get what you want.” Your voice is menacing low and you knew if you still had your parole officer that he would be scolding you for it.

“Captain America stood up for the little guys but you’re just using it as a title, abusing it to act like the hero you tried to be before. You’re a fucking joke.” You release him and walk away. The air in the room felt tense as you plop down on the chair closest to the exit, furthest away from his management team who didn’t know what just happened.

“If you think I’m going to stand by your side after how you just treated my friends, you’re dead fucking wrong.” You shake your head and lean forward in your seat.

He lets out a chuckle, taking a step towards you with his hands fisted by his side. “You’re going to help me if I say you are. I say the words and you’re locked back in the goddamn cell where you belong. Remember who brought you here in the first place.”

“Hey, John, calm down.” Hoskins finally buds in. Walker scoffs and shakes his head, following him to join the rest of their team.

You shift your eyes to the floor, knowing he’s right. The power the government is giving their new Captain is a desperate attempt to give hope to those after the Blip. It’s going straight to his head and you knew it was going to get worse in the long run.

The rest of the flight is awkward. The tension never settling even if Walker acts like nothing just happened. Hoskins was keeping a close eye on you like you were going to bounce back to your Hydra days and take out everyone on the plane. To be fair, you wanted to but you weren’t stupid and you didn’t want to give him another reason to send you back.

Once the plane touches down, you’re out the door. The group was barely out of the seats before they could see you disappear into the airport. Haling a cab and taking it back to the apartment they were renting for you, changing out of your gear and plopping down onto the bed.

The events of the day finally collapse down onto you. This situation was going to be a lot harder than you originally thought. Walker explained it as just one mission to see where the Flag Smashers were taking the stolen vaccines and you would be on your way. “Free at last” to use his words but now you were roped in for the long haul.

You couldn’t stop thinking about the look of betrayal on Bucky’s face either. He had confided in you about how he felt about the new Captain and how lost he felt. If Steve wasn’t right about Sam then what the hell was wrong with Bucky?

Before you realize it, tears were streaming down your cheeks. You knew it was too early to try to reach out to them so you decide to give them time. They were still processing their interactions with the new Captain and the new information about the Flag Smashers being super-soldiers.

If you were going to have to work with Walker, you were going to have to figure out a plan. Racking your brain for ideas, one comes to mind that would be risky. It would be worth it, though. Staring up at the ceiling, you start strategizing a way you could pull this off. You were one of Hydra’s best agents so hopefully, this would be easy. After going against your original thought and shooting Sam a quick text, you slowly drift off asleep.

=====

Your leg bounces under the table as you stare at the clock above the door. It was half-past seven and the breakfast rush was winding down. The diner was slowly emptying, leaving a hand full of tables with families and friends enjoying their meal. The waitress comes up to your booth, standing there until you notice her.

“Ready to order yet, hun’?” The nice older lady questions, breaking your gaze from the entrance to her. You shake your head no before turning back to the door. She gives you a sad smile before looking down at her watch, “It’s been almost twenty minutes, sweetie, are you sure your friends are still coming?”

You nod quickly, no matter what kind of circumstances the two soldiers would never stand you up. Their hearts were too kind for that. “I was just a bit early, I’m kind of nervous.” You shyly admit, sending her a smile.

“Well, I’m bringing you something to eat at least,” She commands, you open your mouth to reject but she cuts you off, “on the house.” She gives you a firm look before walking off to the back.

Right as she disappears into the kitchen, the bell of the diner dings. Your head snaps to it and you can’t help the large smile that appears on your face at the sight of the duo walking in. The two immediately see you since you placed yourself right near the door.

Sam sends you back a smile while Bucky just eyes you down. You were wearing a simple sweater and pants while they were in their usual civilian gear, a ballcap and jacket. You couldn’t help but ogle at how good Bucky looked in the blue Hently you two bought when he first came to Brooklyn.

They slip into the booth, their broad figures barely fitting on the small seat. Sam elbows Bucky as he tries to get comfortable but he doesn’t acknowledge it.

“Morning.” You try to make conversation. “How was the rest of your day yesterday?”

“He got arrested.” Sam bluntly says making your jaw drop. “He missed his check-in with the shrink.”

“I told you not to tell her.” Bucky makes out through clenched teeth, he just shrugs in response. You go to scold him but he holds a steady hand out, “You can yell at me all you want later, what do you want? We don’t have much time.” Your heart drops with how aggressive he’s being towards you.

“I want to help you.” You announce, ignoring Bucky’s eye roll as he remembers who you’re working with. He goes to tell you off just like he told Walker but you start rambling before he could utter a word, “I know it’s not the ideal situation but Walker wants me on his team. If I could earn his trust and figure out what their plans are, I can report back to you two.”

“And how do we not know this is a setup?” Sam points out, leaning forward on the table as Bucky looks around the diner for any sign of said Captain America, “They could be listening right now, they still have you under lock and key.”

You gleam at the mention of that, realizing that you haven’t told them the good news. “Not anymore.” You extend your leg out from under the table for Bucky to see your naked ankle. “Walker pulled some strings to get me off my parole earlier.”

A look of realization comes across Sam’s face once he pieces everything together. He knew how mad you were about the new Captain America, how you helped him and Bucky against the Smashers instead of the other two, and how you didn’t know anything about Bucky getting arrested made sense.

“So, you made a deal with the devil.” Bucky snarkily questions, a look of disappointment on his face.

You let out a scoff at his words, “I did what I had to do, James. Not all of us were lucky enough to get pardoned.” You spit back, tired of how he was acting. “He tricked me, told me it was just one simple favor to repay him. Now, he wants me to be a part of his team to take down the Flag Smashers. Told me if I didn’t help that he would send me back to jail and it would reset everything I had accomplished in the last five years.”

Bucky’s eyes soften at your confession, hanging his head in embarrassment at his assumptions. The waitress comes up and sets the small plate of food down in front of you, giving an awkward smile to the boys before walking off.

You let out a sigh, feeling bad for yelling at him. He was being a dick but that didn’t mean you had to be one back to him. He was going through a lot and this was the last thing he needed.

Grabbing the fork, you stare down at the pancakes. “You don’t have to forgive me or anything but just understand where I’m coming from, please.”

They share a look as they silently communicate. Bucky narrows his eyes and Sam tilts his head at him. You look between them as you try to figure out what’s going on.

“I can’t read your mind, cyborg. Use your words.” Sam finally spits out then elbows him one more time, “Will you please scoot over? I’m suffocating over here!”

Bucky sighs and rolls his eyes at his friend. He gets up out of the booth and slips in next to you, using his larger form to push you closer to the window. Your eyes widen in surprise as he slings his arm to rest behind your head. He then takes the extra fork and stabs it into your hashbrowns.

Sam lets out an awe as he watches the two of you eat from your plate, “Don’t you two look so cute.”

“Shut up, Sam.” You both demand at the same time. He raises his hands up in defense, leaning back in the booth with a smug smile on his face. The two of you easily fall into conversation, catching up on things and giggling at the little jokes he was making. Suddenly, after a few moments of silence as the two of you enjoy the meal, you remember what Sam mentioned earlier.

Bucky lets out a little yelp when you send a swift smack to the back of his head, making the hashbrowns he was about to eat fall off his fork. “What the hell was that for?”

“For getting arrested, are you kidding me, James? Do you know what could’ve happened to you? I swear to God, James Buchanan Barnes, you will be the death of me—“ You continue to scold while Sam lets out a booming laugh. Mad at him for being so careless, you poke and prod at his chest but stop when you notice the expression on his face. Your heart can’t handle the way he pulls out his puppy dog eyes and his pouted lip. “Oh, don’t pull that shit with me.”

_____

untitled tfawts fic: @crowleysqueenofhell @mischiefmanaged71 @thewinterrbucky @lizajane3 @ahahafudge @spookycereal-s @a-girl-who-loves-disney @kittengirl998 @ sebby-staan

[weasleypogues]

written in the stars (f.w. au) pt. 3

thanks for supporting guys it means sosososoososos much!!!! i love this little fic sm so this is so much fun! this is the final part!!! again requests are open <3 

taglist:  @daddystevee @nojamsonmytoast @thebadassbitchqueen @hogwarts-babe

hope you enjoy!! xx :)

masterlist. part 1. part 2. 

unironically, you felt the need for a towel for a quick second because of the sweatiness of your palms. you were walking towards the gryffindor common room with malia, jada, and cedric. excitement and anxiety were bubbling inside of you the closer you got towards the party. 

“are you sure theres a party? it sounds quiet?” jada asked malia, somewhat nervously. she had her eyebrows furrowed and didn’t want to make the mistake of four random hufflepuffs walking into the gryffindor common room.

“yeah, i’m sure hermione granger put up some kind of charm to keep out the noise. plus, (y/n)’s soulmate confirmed it anyways.” malia responded, sending a playful wink your way. a smile crept onto your face and it would’ve been your wand that you grasped your hand around in excitement but instead it was the marble and slightly cold pen. 

“balderdash.” cedric spoke to the painting. the fat lady looked at him and rolled her eyes, acknowledging that he wasn’t a gryffindor but if she heard the password she would let him in. the fat lady made a mental note to change the password on her own terms. the portrait swung open and you walked through a slight haze as if someone turned on the heater and you could see it in the air. as you passed that hazy barrier, the bass of the music vibrated through your body. the lights were turned off but charmed bright red lights took it’s place and the room was crowded.

cedric and malia broke off to say hi to a couple of friends. you made your way over to ginny weasley with jada by your side and tapped her on the arm, eager to say hi to your friend. there was a time during the triwizard tournament that you got on the same boat as her to go to the second task. you watched as she scolded her two brothers for being too mean when trying to sell their pranking candy and chuckled. you hopped on the boat with jada and another roommate and she was shy but wanted to hop on as well.

“(y/n)! happy birthday!! im so happy to see you!” she exclaimed and didn’t hesitate to pull you into a hug. you returned the hug and had a small conversation with her. however, you felt somewhat bad when she started a conversation and you couldn’t help but let your eyes dart around the room, as if there would be a bright sign and an arrow pointing over someone’s head that read “(y/n)’s soulmate!”

ginny noticed your distracted eyes and caught your attention again, “looking for your soulmate?” she asked with a smirk and her eyebrows raised. you felt your cheeks get hot and nodded before letting out a deep breath.

“i think he’s in gryffindor. seems to be somewhat forgetful of the common room password.” you announced and she laughed, playfully rolling her eyes.

“i know way too many people like that in this house. you’d think people would learn by now.” ginny joked. her next sentence was cut off by the unison yelling of two redheaded boys standing on the table with two bottles of daisyroot drought. they both shook them very hard and popped off the caps, spraying the crowd below them as if it were champagne, leaving everyone soaked. most students opened their mouths or cheered along. you laughed and rolled your eyes playfully, pulling out your pen and writing on your arm.

will definitelyyyyy need a towel after the stunt the twins just pulled

you laughed to yourself and stuck the pen inside your pocket and glanced back up at the twins, ready for another shower of daisyroot drought. while george had a giant smile on his face, fred had the bottle in his right hand and was using a free pointer finger to lift up the sleeve of his shirt on his left arm.

you felt a lump in your throat and intently watched him read it. you grabbed jada’s arm next to you as you were frozen watching fred read the sentence to himself and smirking.

“jada.”

“what’s up?” she replied, a little loudly over the booming music. 

“fred weasley.” you said loud enough so she could hear but in a good enough volume that people may not look over. this, weirdly enough, didn’t include ginny.

“what about him? did he get too much drought in your eyes?” ginny joked and laughed, but her smile turned into her eyebrows furrowing as she stared at your shocked face.

your eyes were still upon fred who was deparately patting around his shirt and pants, trying to find the pen he realized he must’ve misplaced. he looked frazzled and hopped down from the table.

“is fred- you know?” jada replied, eager evident in her voice and her eyes basically sparkling for you.

“wait, fred is your soulmate?” ginny basically yelled and you covered her mouth with your hand to get her to shut up. if you were wrong, that would’ve just been embarrassing. 

“i think?” you said, chuckling and your shocked face soon came to the realizaiton of how happy you were. you couldn’t stop your fingers from tingling and bringing the hand that was once on ginny’s mouth, back to yours. ginny was beaming and wrapped her arms around you.

“ugh i hope so! my future sister in law!” she exclaimed and you laughed.

“don’t get too excited, i haven’t confirmed it yet.” you reminded her, your face feeling hot at the thought of marrying fred weasley.

“let me go ask him for you!” ginny said, basically on her way to confront her older brother. you grabbed her arms, your eyes wide and shook your head.

“don’t! because if it isn’t and you ask him about it, that would be so embarrassing.” you stated, worry filling up the tone of your voice. you saw george getting down from the table acknowleding the disappearence of his brother and spotted some fellow gryffindors to talk to. although, you couldn’t spot fred.

“no, (y/n), you don’t understand! it makes sense! he mentioned to george today that he just started talking to his soulmate!” ginny reassured you and grabbed ron’s arm as he was innocently passing by.

“bloody hell, ginny! do something about those claws of yours!” ron whined and exasperated, glaring at his little sister.

“(y/n) is fred’s soulmate!” she said, her smile emitting towards his direction and his annoyed face turned into shock.

“wait! we aren’t totally sure yet!” you said, your heart rate increasing at the fact that at this rate, ginny would tell the entire weasley lineage before you could confirm it with fred himself.

“go up to him now! i don’t know how much longer i can hear of him talking about not knowing his soulmate, five months of talking everyone’s ears off. worst case scenario, he’s not.” ron said, basically screaming over the loud music. you laughed in response but took what he said in, everything was really making sense.

“what are you guys up to?” you heard a deep and familar voice ask from beside you. you looked up and your heart dropped for a second but slowly fluttered up as you identified that the man infront of you wasn’t fred, but george. you admired the similarity in features for a second before ron’s voice snapped you out of it.

“(y/n) is fred’s soulmate!” ron exclaimed and your hands lifted to your face in stress in an instant.

“merlin’s beard, are all the weasley’s this terrible at keeping secrets?” you inquired, your face going hot, for what felt like the 100th time since coming into the common room. ron’s face looked sheepish but you felt george’s eyes on you.

“are you serious? thank god, he never stops talking about you! let me get him, he can’t find his pen!” george said but you grabbed his arm before he could go on his journey to find his frazzled twin looking for his pen. you let out a stressed breath and paused.

“wait, he talks about me?” you asked, a gleam of hope sparkled in your eye. george smiled and rolled his eyes, “yeah, i never hear the end of it.”

your nerves felt calmer and you looked around. “fuck it, i’m going to look for him.” you stated, feeling a sudden gryffindor courage. fred’s siblings all had similar happy expressions and you chuckled, realizing fred didn’t only have an identical twin but basically an identical family. you glanced at jada and she gave you a thumbs up before you took off. 

it didn’t take long to find fred, seeing as he was above six foot and had vibrant hair. you saw him rummaging in open spots of the common room and under pillows and chairs. “lost something?” you asked, trying to sound unknowing. 

he glanced up immediately at the sound of your voice and a smile formed on his face at the sight of you. “to your surprise, i actually enjoy spending my time organizing furniture and making sure it looks up to par.”

you laughed at his joke and rolled your eyes, feeling as if your heart was going to beat out of your chest. “here, take my pen since you lost yours.”

fred reached out to grab it for a second before putting it together, “how did you know i lost my pen?” 

“kind of put it together that you could be a forgetful person. first the gryffindor common room password, than your pen...you have a track record, weasley.”

a smirk formed on his face and he was putting the pieces together. the smirk soon transformed into a softer smile and a sparkle shone in his eye at the sight of you. you drew a tiny heart on your wrist to see if it would show up on his, to prove your theory right. you saw glitter light from his wrist and your eyes met.

“i guess that settles the mystery.” fred stated, a giant smile on his face as the black ink disappeared from both of your wrists. “can i?” he asked.

he walked towards you slightly learning in before you smiled and nodded. he let his hands make their way to cup your face and pulled you in for a kiss. you felt yourself slightly on your tippy-toes and let yours hands make their way to his torso, deepening the kiss. you suddenly heard cheering and the both of you pulled away, calmer than before. you glanced over at the sound and saw cedric, jada, malia, the weaselys, and most of their friends cheering and clapping, excited for the two of you. 

your face went hot and you got slightly embarrassed at all the attention before letting your head burrow into fred’s chest, laughing. you felt his body vibrating at he laughed too, wrapping his arms around your head and pulling you somehow closer to his body warmth. 

“i knew it would be you.” fred whispered into your ear before planting another kiss on the top of your head. 

“it was written in the stars.” you responded with before leaning in for another kiss.

[thisdreamplace]

ashamed to say the 3D reflects our true inner reality, yes? my ENTIRE family has turned against me, after some atrocious conflicts in which they all ganged up on me nd judged me, name-calling, very hurtful things too, provoked me. i been dealing with some serious mental uh 'issues' on my own nd when this happend i was already on the verge of a breakdown nd the good news is while the conflict happened i kept telling myself theyre only reflecting me u can get thru it etc. Later i looked at the hard facts nd realised some of the hurtful things they said were my deep secret feelings abt myself. BUT my question is why the HELL cant they talk to me like normal people? confronting one person vs whole family, why?! i felt so small nd like an object, nd not a single person defended me. am i not a part of the family?

Part 2 is simply its been a week and theyve still been cold towards me as if I yelled AT THEM ABT THEIR PAINFUL 'tRuThS' in front of EVERYONE LMAOOO. At first if i was around we'd have dinner together while they'd all talk to each other like best friends aka sickeningly overly friendly while completely IGNORING me while i sat there. i could tolerate it. I WAS PISSED AT THEM TOO Now its too painful. They're having dinner without telling me, yesterday didnt leave enough food for me knowing i hadnt eaten, serve tea/snacks without my portion. i honestly feel so unspeakably trigered nd sad. worst is these things r reminding me of deep school memories when id feel excluded like this by other kids at parties or class activities nd its like im back there. anyway im glad i controled myself a bit nd didnt counter with horrid things abt them to THEM yet they think they can say the same to me. im so hurt rn i cant even tell u lol i was okay the whole week but now its too much,, ive been crying the whole day

thing is, ik this seems like 'im a victim oh noooo they ganged up on meee'. Nope its more like how do i change myself to change them?! u could say why not talk to them how they made u feel, except whenever ive defended myself in the past regarding hurtful things they/anyone in family did, the siblings/parents would say irritating things like: "oh so YOU'RE the one hurt? Oh thats right, its because YOU'RE right! yes, yes, you're always right. Forgive me for saying anything against the perfect person u are." Or one of them says: "You?! I hurt YOU? What about me? You don't care about me! So you think what ur doing is okay?" or "no, who do YOU think u are to tell ME what to do?" it just goes in circles like this! i dont deserve to hurt myself or do smth to myself even if they dont give a damn, even if years of silent suffering of the 'mEntAL pRoBlEms' (which my lovely parents have already told me is my fault years ago, hence why I NEVER show it to them, unless im crying too much then lol they just mock me, but idc abt THAT bcoz now ik i hav a right to let out my emotions)). i mean this is worse rjan usual. its kinda insane nd when guests come they start talking to me as if nothing's wrong then when they leave, they ignore me!

this whole twisted dynamics, feelijf left out nd helpless is ig some crazy assumptin from childhood of being alone nd unable to defend myself. plus when they argye with anyone, they become overly self-righteous nd over the years its clear they can only scream, blame the scapegoat and never talk abt serious matter like normal ppl. And yes, in the past when i bring this up, they like to reply with stuff like: "no YOU'RE the one who doesnt talk to US bla bla" like, when i do u just shut me down? have belittled my mental 'issues', mocked me when im at my worst, stabbed me with cruel silent treatments nd thinking its alright "bcoz of self-righteousness blegh". Or maybe i think its okay for them to punish me? or whatev? Like law says u get what u r. if these ~~~ keep doing this to me, im doubly ashamed to say this means im the one at fault?! i let this monster assunptin grow nd now idk what to do. the worst thing imo is how i failed to tell them,even if they ignored me in the past, how i feel when anything like this or a conflict happens nd none of them stand up for me, or at least are neutral to me. bcoz now if i do, they say nope, u dont care what we do, YOUR the shameless one :! so yeah they hav the advantage of 'numbwrs' while im too afraid to stand up for myself lol. btw they never apologize nd i suspect they expect ME to apologize to TYEM bcoz everything's already ruined bcoz of 'me'..... i give up on them, i really do, but my heart hurts. Either i harden my heart, nd save up to move out, OR i try to change my self or whatev assumptins i have. But how do i do that? i try afirming: "my familys so nice to me, im respected by them" but it feels so fake tears literally enter my eyes lol

firstly i want to say, thank you for coming here to vent and being open about your feelings. it’s so important sometimes to just let it all out, without holding back. so that way you can move forward more bravely, to create the life you truly want to experience. that being said, i am going to be completely honest with you here in hopes that perhaps it may inspire you and you will be ready to do what is needed for the life you truly want to experience.

“BUT my question is why the HELL cant they talk to me like normal people?” -> “i felt so small nd like an object, nd not a single person defended me. am i not a part of the family?” here is your question, and here is your answer. i think that being completely honest when venting your feelings can actually be so helpful, because if you read back what you have said, you will be able to clearly find the patterns that are creating your personal hell. FEELING IS THE SECRET. ASSUMPTIONS HARDEN INTO FACT. the true way you feel, becomes your experience. Feelings/assumptions/beliefs come first, and the experiences come second to confirm them. That’s all that’s happening here.

i am glad that you were able to keep your reactions to a minimum! that's wonderful and as many of us know, it can sometimes be hard to do in such hurtful circumstances. but you managed to do it, this shows just a small glimpse of the power you truly hold within. although emotionally you may feel out of control, there is still the choice to choose better for yourself which you demonstrated through your reaction to them. good for you!

the truth is, you acknowledge the victim mindset to seem like you’re not engulfed in it, but no, you’re still very clearly engulfed in it. as i have said before, you can’t be a VICTOR and feel bad about it. feeling bad about taking responsibility, about everyone is you pushed out, about any of these types of concepts automatically shows a victim mindset. talking to them won’t do anything, because there are no second causes. you could talk to them nicely, you could be the nicest person in the world. but you can’t pretend your way out of your inner world. your inner world is the one and only cause of your experiences. until you change the story you tell yourself, they will stay the same. this is a hard pill to swallow sometimes. and it can feel heavily, because it’s ultimately only you’re choice. they can’t change until you do. the heaviness of the situation may make it seem impossible to turn around, but that’s just an illusion. your emotional attachment to the situation makes it seem so real and hard to change, but no. that’s just an illusion too. however, it’s ultimately your choice. Do you want to take responsibility for your life, or do you want to keep being tossed around like your lost at sea, victim to the merciless angry waves? Because we always have a choice. No one chooses your inner world, you do. No one can go into your mind and decide things for you, that’s only your job.

you can harden your heart, but who would be the one who suffers more? It won’t be your family, i can assure you. it’ll only be you. by doing that, you keep that old story alive and therefore you keep experiencing it. you keep those stories alive that are desperately showing themselves to you, saying “LET US GO.” but you remain identified with those painful stories, so you grip onto them tight. you keep on thinking of possible reasons for their behavior, but you could just read your entire ask back to yourself and you’ll see every reason. your reactions, your beliefs about them, your emotional pain. its your refusal to let those things go, and focus on what you truly want that keeps you in this state and keeps them in this state. sure it’s painful to face the responsibility at first, but it’s not a blame game. thinking its about blame is just a misunderstanding of the teachings. it’s not about they’re so perfect and you’re so not, so you have to change your ways. it’s about this is how life works here. this is about... you can ONLY ever experience self. whatever is going on within, will be reflected in your outer world. it’s about how they can’t change, UNTIL YOU DO. so instead of feeling sorry for yourself, you have to decide to give yourself the gift of a wonderful life because you have that power too. you stop deciding they can be in control of your experience, and you decide your experience yourself.

to change your assumptions, stop trying to affirm over them and actually face what’s keeping you from believing in your desires. yeah, it’s going to be painful and uncomfortable. but you need to face the pain that you’re running away from, so that it can finally be released. you have to realize, it only stayed true because you believed it to be true. and if you are to live a life free from that story, and experience a more desirable story, then you must let the pain go. give yourself love and grace as you work through it, and know that there is a more beautiful side of life that awaits for you to accept it in.

No One To Change But Self

There is Nothing to Forgive

How to Sit with Your Triggers

give yourself the time you need, it's not race. the love that you wish to experience exists, allow it in. 💖

[iibonniee]

Cherry Lip Gloss (Im Changkyun)

Warnings: smut, angst

Word Count: 2.9k

Masterlist | Re-Write

A/N: The end to this might end up getting a re-write. It feels rushed in a way but I still wanna post it regardless. This story needs to be more angsty. Anyways, enjoy my first Changkyun fanfic.

The electric that easily flowed throughout the club was enough to keep the people in it alive and moving. The music that played loudly could almost be deafening if the people that danced their life away weren’t focused on the buzzing feeling of getting drunk and enjoying the feeling of another’s body against their own.

The club was buzzing with life, each second welcomed a new face ready to drink their night away and be filled with a familiar feeling of ecstasy as the night grew older and older ready to meet the greeting sun. A long day brought them here, and they were ready to face the consequences of a hangover when the time came. But for now, letting themselves go would be their main objective.

But the loud music mixed with the smell of arousal from the club-goers didn’t seem to bother Changkyun once as he pushed his way through the crowd. The bar would be his favorite destination for the night.

Sharp brown eyes found a seat away from the rowdy crowd of men and women. A look of acknowledgment was shot between him and the female bartender who looked rather done with her shift. He knew what he needed and what he needed was something strong. So he voiced that to the girl as she lazily nodded her head.

Once the drink was in his hands, he turned his attention towards the crowd. It was easy to tell how many people stood on the dance floor. He ignored the flirtatious looks as his eyes kept scanning. Rather he ignored them all and kept his eyes on one single person as they did the same with him. Changkyun watched her movements carefully. Her movements matched the beat of the music almost perfectly, almost as if the girl dancing had practiced for this moment in particular.

Another sip of alcohol burned down his throat but he gave no signs it did too much to bother him. Relaxing back against the bar, Changkyun could only note how inviting the girl looked dancing alone. It was almost an itch he wanted to scratch ever so desperately, but instead, he stayed by the bar playing with the rim of his shot glass as his brown eyes stared down the girl with mixed emotions.

He knew he shouldn’t do it. But he couldn’t help it. He knew it certainly wasn’t the alcohol talking. He drank merely a sip of it. He was already intoxicated by the mere thought of being in the same room as her.

Changkyun noted her skintight dress. The dress that fit her almost too perfectly. It seemed so new. It had Changkyun shift where he stood against the bar. Everyone around him was a seamless void. Only the girl on the dance floor was in his line of sight, her movement ever so flawless it had Changkyun itching for more, to feel more.

His skin tingled with unknown sensations. He craved for things he knew he shouldn’t have. But he wanted it. To reach for something that maybe could be dangerous, but to live for danger is what he would do if it meant achieving a toxic high. Something so toxic he knew it would be killer.

Changkyun couldn’t recall when he downed the rest of his drink or when he moved to push himself through the bodies that grinded against each other to achieve one of the highs they were looking for. It felt like a hike to get to the single her, but once he was within reach the males hands wrapped around her waist pulling her back flush against his front.

The dress she wore was almost next to perfect in Changkyun’s eyes. The same color purple he had loved so much. His purple. It was almost too much for him to handle. Especially with the way his hands moved around her body, around her dress. It was smooth, the skin showing just the right amount of skin to make anyone go wild. Perhaps with too much skin he started feeling a bit territorial.

Her presence alone was enough to fill his body with warmth. It wasn’t like the packed bodies did much. They were merely a void he’d have his mind pushed to the side so he could focus on her alone.

The feeling of her hands running through Changkyun’s hair was enough to let him hum out in content, but it was the feeling of her grinding against his body that drove him wild. Fingers against the silk of her dress had Changkyun’s mind on a fritz. He was barely holding himself together at the feeling of her body against his own.

Moving his hand up Changkyun caught her face turning it towards the left so he could catch her lips with his own. The taste of her cherry chapstick was enough to send Changkyun’s mind into a mess of foggy unknowns. He knew he’d be in that land for a long time.

The other hand continued to explore her body. Changkyun wanted to feel more. He needed to feel more. He wanted to know what her skin felt like against his own. He wasn’t oblivious to the small whines that came from her. The music was loud, but not loud enough to hide those from the rapper.

When she turned her body around Changkyun’s hands were quick to pull her close lips connecting with hers. Now it was Changkyun’s turn to run his fingers through her h/c. Her hair was soft, surely driving the male into another state of a wild frenzy deep inside.

The moment Changkyun pulled away for some air he could only read one thing from the girl that stood right in front of him.

More.

Whether it was on purpose or accident, the soft cry that came from her when she fell onto the bed had Changkyun go crazy. Brown eyes watched as she propped herself up with a slight smirk on her face. Almost as if she knew what she did to him. Perhaps she did.

He knew she did.

Lips quickly met each other once more. This time there was no worry about where Changkyun could move his hands to. No worries that he’d expose something she didn’t want to. Lips continued to fight against each other, the tongues fighting for an unnamed dominance. It was a perfect bliss that had both of them melting into a mess of ecstasy.

When their lungs cried for air Changkyun moved his lips from her own to her neck treating such like it was a canvas and his lips were the paintbrush. The soft mewls and whimpers that came from the female below him had Changkyun wanting to rush. He knew there was more than just small cries. But Changkyun took his time marking up her neck as if it was the last thing the male could ever do.

Once satisfied with his work he pulled away immediately making eye contact with the panting girl. Her eyes were already half glossed over, lips were swollen from their little make-out session. But what Changkyun wanted to see was more. What she had hidden under the purple silk dress had been hidden from the male for far too long. He wanted to see more. To taste more.

Eyes flicked up for a moment to lock with hers to try and read what she wanted. It was almost a relief when he had read it so easily.

Make me yours.

Changkyun couldn’t remember when he had taken (tore) the dress off the girl that laid in his bed. But seeing her fully exposed for him only had Changkyun’s breath hitch. It was surely a sight that Changkyun wanted to imprint in his mind forever.

Lips connected to her left breast quickly causing the girl above him to cry out in shock, the mewls and whines now something much more. Music to the males' ears more like. Alternating between the left and right breast with his lips, his hand would play with the breast that wasn’t occupied with his lips.

Slowly Changkyun made his way down to the place where he wanted to be the whole night. Soft kisses peppered the girl’s stomach often leaving small little bruises that’ll have the girl remember this night for as long as they remained.

The smell of her arousal was enough for Changkyun’s mind to grow foggy within seconds. Such a sweet scent that he had hoped he wouldn’t forget about.

Her legs were now spread open allowing him to do whatever he wanted to do to her. Teasingly he kissed the corners of her legs while brown eyes met hazy e/c. One lick parted her folds causing her to jerk in surprise and pleasure.

Changkyun was slowly getting off at the moans that emitted from her. The taste that came from her was too sweet, almost perfect. And he wanted more. To have his taste buds remember every sweet drop that her body gave him. His tongue continued to give love to her clit as he inserted a finger slowly gathering a rhythm.

Slowly, her moans turned into whines and praises. Her hands no longer grabbed at the sheets, rather they were now tangled within his hair grabbing and pulling. It didn’t both Changkyun for a moment. Instead, he enjoyed the feeling of it, and the moment it ended he knew he’d be lost.

Another finger was slid in causing the girl to cry out in pleasure. His tongue continued to include her clit while his fingers worked whatever magic they could. Changkyun knew she was close when her walls continued to clamp around his fingers. The whine left the girl was quickly replaced with a cry of pleasure when his tongue entered inside her.

It didn’t take long for her to cry out finding her release. The taste of her on Changkyun’s tongue drove the male wild. It was all he wanted to taste that whole night. Lapping up whatever was left, his lips began to leave more kisses wherever they could.

She allowed him to.

Her body glistened with sweat as his lips met her own once more, the soft moan bubbling from deep within her telling him that she enjoyed the taste left on his lips.

His hands were everywhere once more. His brain needed to remember every single little detail about her. The blocked whine told him that there was more she wanted, and who was he to throw away her want?

Pop.

The sound of their lips disconnecting from one another echoed throughout the room as he made a move to have their bodies fully meet. The unison of cries and please joined the forgotten sound. And soon the sound of the bed rocking and skin meeting was what filled the room.

Her moans were like music to his ears once more. A song so beautiful it would put his own music to shame if it were to ever meet the light of day. But he couldn’t allow it to happen for he knew he was too possessive to allow such to happen.

Fingers clasped together as her legs wrapped around his waist urging him with unspoken words to go deeper. So he did. Deeper. Faster. He gave her his all.

Just for her.

He knew she was close. She squeezed around him tightly. And for the first time, he hated it, but he couldn’t stop himself from chanting “cum around my cock baby girl” over and over like a soft cry hoping that she’d fulfill his dream.

She did.

Her cries were much louder than her moans thanks to the added pressure when his hands snuck down to give her abounded clit some love. He knew he was close. He was sloppy, and her own mixed words of “cum in me. Make me yours” filled the air over his own cries and pleas.

He couldn’t help it. He couldn’t control himself. It was too much. He listened to her. His own cum filling her up as his thrusts never seemed to let up. Not even for a second as he chanted out “mine mine mine” like a prayer.

He knew it wasn’t true. Not even when he fell beside her holding her close. And certainly not when he woke up to an empty bed and the birds chirping. He knew he shouldn’t have been disappointed. But the choked-up sob that left his lips told his heart that he once again wanted to get drunk and forget what happened.

A mistake that he had hoped would fix something. She wouldn’t stay. Not even if he got down on his knees and begged her to. He hated how easily he fell for her charms. Just like the day he fell in love with her. He knew the games she was playing.

She was toying with his emotions. Just like the day she walked out the door after their ugly argument. Just like the day she posted a picture with another man. Just like last night wearing that damned purple dress.

The tears were fresh reminders that the hanging bandages around his heart were torn open. It hurt. Hurt hurt hurt hurt. And all he could do was cry. Soft silent sobs wracking and shaking his body so much that it hurt. And not even curling up into a pitied ball would help ease the pain.

He needed her. The person that held the supply of air. And she took it and left without even looking back. That same four-lettered word rang in his mind. But how could he forget it was his fault she left.

He was busy. He forgot. He became careless.

“I wouldn’t care if you left! I could have anyone!”

It made him sick knowing he didn’t feel the tasteful alcohol. Rather it was his own angered sober thoughts that voiced it. The only time he regretted his words was when she slammed the door behind her and blocked his number.

He lied to her. He couldn’t have anyone. The fame was too much. He needed her. He needed her to feel normal. To not be I.M of Monsta X. No. To be Changkyun that had his heart loved.

But it was too damaged and it hurt. Everything hurt.

***

He knew he should care.

His phone went off like a madman and he couldn’t find himself caring. He was unmoving from where he sat. He couldn’t remember when he carried his body to his dorm room nor could he remember anything other than what happened the night prior. Her body was all he couldn’t remember.

He was stuck. Motionless. Spiraling into the depths of emptiness and he knew he wouldn’t find his way out for a long time. So why should he care? Why should he give a damn about the world when it seemed not to want to care about him? Why was it so hard to hold something that didn’t want him back?

He wanted to scream, but when he opened his mouth, nothing came out. Nothing more but another pitied cry. How had he not noticed the prickling tears welled in his eyes like a dam ready to break? Then it broke. The ugly tears that crashed down his face ready to find a home on the ground below.

His body was shaking. When did that start? When did the hysterics start? Why did she do this to him? Why couldn’t he move on? Why couldn’t he breathe? Why why why?

He screamed.

A cry of agony that was held for no one but the pain he caused himself. He did this to himself. The scars are forever there and unfading. It was unfair. Life was unfair.

Why did he let himself slip? Why couldn’t he stay home? Why couldn’t he just ask Minhyuk for some cheering up? And why the hell was someone blowing up his phone?

The same amount of why’s that drove a headache into his head and a heavy heart cracked more.

He sat on his floor bawled and bare. His heart was out there that was soaked in the tears of his heartbreak. And all he could remember was the damn cherry chapstick that stole his heart.

Who was touching him? Why was he having a panic attack? And why was he hearing the voice of the woman that left while he was asleep?

He was hyperventilating. Freaking out while clawing at his chest gasping for air that tried to fill blocked lungs. Everything hurt. His mind played too many games with him and he certainly felt dizzy.

“Changkyun.” A voice so soft broke his heavy and intoxicating thoughts.

No.

This wasn’t real. It couldn’t. Why couldn’t he tear his eyes away from the floor? He saw it. He saw her. But he couldn’t see her fully due to his eyes that sat unmovingly. She was real. She came back to him.

“I’m here. I’m here.”

She was here. That word repeated in his mind now like a beautiful melody. It snapped him out of his trance. The darkness that fogged his vision was now gone and replaced something else.

His attention slowly turned to her. The girl that stole his heart. She was just as breathtaking as last night. As always. He noticed her teary eyes as she searched his face.

“W-What—” Why couldn’t he finish his sentence?

“Don’t cry. I’m here. It’s ok.”

Ok. It was ok. It was going to be ok.

He couldn’t hold himself back. His lips caught hers, the familiar taste of cherry chapstick staining his lips.

It was going to be ok.

[free-pool-trash]

folklore - isaac lahey {9/?}

Hey lovlies ✌🏻💕 sorry this part took so long something wasn’t sitting right with me so I rewrote it like 3 time 😫 but don’t worry I figured it out.

It’s all angst from here I’m afraid crew

👁💧👄💧👁

Pleasssssse let me know what you think, im hanging by a thread here 😭💕

Word count: 5.1K

Warning(s): fluff at the start :), a whole bunch of swearing, blood, mentions of death, let me know if I missed any! <3

Masterlist

taglist (open): @makeusfreefromthisfandom​, @cece-lives-here ​, @chocolate-raspberries​, @belsandthings​, @dancing-tacos-23 , @truly-dionysus​, @britty443​, @tanyaherondale​, @furiouspockettoad​, @yunsh-17 , @random-thoughts-003​, @gloomybrieyxb​​, @linkpk88 ​, @big-galaxy-chaos​ , @im-a-stranger-thing ​​, @its-evita-here , @pad-foots , @sweetpeabellamyblakedracomalfoy , @bookswillfindyouaway ,  @what-the-hap-is-fuckening​, @awkwardnesshabitat​, @pieces-by-me , @wreny24​, @marveloucnco , @babypink224221 , @bookish-bucky @alexa-rae-dreamz , @thebookisbtr , @nxstalgicnxbxdy , @cloudy-zoey , @booknymph02 , @tairisceana let me know if you’d like to be added <3  (i had to remove some because tumblr wont let me tag them 💔)

The next morning came by all too quickly, you’d barely gotten any sleep. Yourself and Isaac spent the whole night talking, just like you used to before the tone of your lives had changed drastically.

There was so much you needed to get off your chest, and of course Isaac had a lot to say too so that’s what the pair of you did- put everything out on the table.

You did a whole lot of talking, laughed a lot, cried a little and for the first time ever during one of your and Isaac’s late night chats there was an incredible amount of shared kisses. Those little perks of being a couple were something you could definitely get used to.

Your fingers drew circles on Isaac’s chest, the boy laid there, contently looking down at you. Your head was comfortably tucked against his shoulder, turned up at an angle so that you were still face to face.

He noted how your eyes glinted in the morning sun, watery due to lack of sleep. It was crazy to him; the effect that you had. He swore he could be on fire and all it would take to put him out was one of your reassuring smiles pointed even vaguely in his direction.

Realistically, Isaac knew he should’ve been sad- heartbroken, even. His father had just been quite brutally murdered, he should be a mess, but he wasn’t.

Maybe it had something to do with the years of trauma the man had inflicted on him or maybe it was Isaac’s new supernatural status, whatever the reason for it, Isaac wasn’t mourning the death of his father.

Instead, all he could think about was how warm your body felt against his.

“It’s morning time.” He smiled at your murmur, the smile widened when you pressed a soft kiss to his collarbone.

Isaac hummed in acknowledgment and squeezed your leg that you had thrown across his stomach. “Yeah.”

You moved your chin to rest against his chest, eyes looking into his, “We can stay here if you want. We don’t have to go to school.” You suggested but Isaac knew it was more of a plea when he saw the hopeful grin growing on your lips.

“Nah I gotta go in. I have lacrosse practice.” He spoke out, his voice low and grumbly from how tired he was.

You scoffed jokingly, pushing yourself up so your lips were hovering over his, “Lacrosse huh?”

His eyes were hooded now as he glanced down at your lips, his hands moving to grasp your waist, “Mhm.”

With a smirk you ghosted his lips with your own, you could hear his heart beating through his chest and you could feel how badly he wanted to connect his lips to yours.

“Well then I guess we better get a move on.” You whispered against his lips, pulling away abruptly and hoping out of the bed, strutting to the bathroom with a sway in your hips as you knew he was watching.

A look of disbelief was painted across his face as he shouted through the walls, “Out of all the things that have happened this week that was the most fucked up!”

*

You were going to kill Scott when you got your hands on him. Seriously could he have been anymore obvious?

“Scott! What the hell are you doing.” You whispered from the bleachers, knowing he could hear you.

The boy whispered back, determination clear in his voice, “There’s another werewolf. I need to find out who it is.”

He must’ve smelled it off him. So much for keeping it a secret.

“Scott stop, I know who it is.” You panicked, by the time the words left your mouth both Isaac and Scott had sent each other flying through the air.

As you made your way down from your spot on the bleachers to separate the commotion happening between your two baby werewolves, you noticed sheriff Stilinski and a few deputies making their way across the field.

The sheriff’s gaze was set on Isaac and you found your feet matching the older man’s pace in a silent race to get to the boy in question.

Unfortunately, since you were unable to use vamp speed, the sheriff had beaten you in the unspoken race. His hand had wrapped around Isaac’s bicep as he attempted to lead him away.

When you realised what was happening, you threw caution to the wind and began jogging, not even sparing Scott or Stiles a glance when they called out for you to stop.

Once you were close enough you reached out, successfully grabbing Isaac’s wrist and stopping him and the sheriff in their tracks. “What’s going on?” You demanded, looking between Isaac and the sheriff.

“They think I killed my dad.” Isaac told you quietly and you couldn’t stop the look of utter disbelief that appeared on your face as you moved to stand between Isaac and the sheriff.

“Are you kidding me?” The sheriff sighed with exhaustion at your shout. He knew it was going to be a long day when he saw his son and Scott marching toward the already escalating scene.

“Look, kid. He’s a suspect we have to hold him.” Sheriff Stilinski had been making arrests for a long time but he was sure the look you were giving him was the most venomous he’d ever seen.

“A suspect? Why? What’s your proof?” You shot out, eyebrows furrowed and fangs ready to spring from your gums.

Maybe it had something to do with the night of the full moon looming but you were finding it extremely difficult to keep your anger in check. After yesterday, you were almost certain if your rage got out out of hand there’d be no stopping you.

“We, uh, have reason to believe that Isaac had motive to kill his father. That’s all I can tell you.”

You scowled at him, easing up only slightly as you felt Isaac interlocking his fingers with yours from behind you. “That’s bullshit! He couldn’t have killed his dad because he was with me.” You lied smoothly.

The sheriff raised an eyebrow in disbelief, “With you?”

“Mhm. At my place.” You continued, ignoring the squeeze of warning you were getting from Isaac.

“Look, we have an eye witness account saying that Isaac fled his home, followed by his father and your name never came up.”

Letting out a cynical laugh you all but squared up to the man, “Yeah? And where do you think he fled to?” You asked challengingly.

You would’ve said more if Stiles hadn’t shoved himself in between yourself and his father, sporting a fake smile on his face as he started to ramble, “Hey guys! How we all doing? Good? Good. That’s really great to hear. (Y/n) can I borrow you for a second?” Stiles prompted you, nodding his head rather aggressively in an attempt to get you to stand down.

“No.” You and the sheriff spoke simultaneously, shocking Stiles.

“Young lady, I don’t think you understand the seriousness of what you’re saying. Being an accomplice to murder is a serious offence.” He told you sternly, clearly wanting to give you an opportunity to back down and walk away.

“(Y/n) come on.” Scott pleaded from behind you and you could feel the anxiety seeping off of both Stiles and Isaac.

Stiles laughed nervously, also trying to give you a fighting chance of walking away, “She’s not an accomplice! You’re not an accomplice, right?”

He fixed you with a confused look and repeated, “Right?”

“No I’m not an accomplice because Isaac didn’t kill his father!” You rebutted angrily through gritted teeth, the boys surrounding you terrified of the look on your face in that moment.

With a hard look, sheriff Stilinski took your arm in one hand and Isaac’s in the other and pulled the pair of you towards the police car, “I’m afraid I’m gonna have to take you both into holding.”

“Why the hell would you do that?” You heard Scott exclaim desperately from behind you, his voice two octaves higher than usual.

Carefully, you began to whisper quietly under your breath so that only Scott and Isaac would hear you, “Tonight’s the full moon. I’m not letting them put him in a holding cell alone. Call Derek. Come get us out.”

You didn’t glance back at Scott to check if he heard you, you simply kept walking ahead and complied with the sheriff as he placed you into the car, beside Isaac.

*

“Since we’re technically in prison and you’re technically part k9, does that mean you’re my bitch?” You wondered out loud, looking across the holding cell at Isaac who sat (moping) on the bench.

“Don’t make me laugh. I’m mad at you.” He grumbled and you pouted from your spot on the floor.

“It was a serious question.” You whined.

Isaac groaned, completely disregarding your question, “You’re insane? You know that don’t you?”

“Rude.” You complained, leaning your head back against the cold bars of the cell.

“No seriously. You shouldn’t be in here with me.” Isaac grumbled yet again.

“Ok, first of all, you shouldn’t even be in here in the first place because-“ you paused, took a deep breath and looked at the camera adjacent to yourself and Isaac on the wall outside the cell before shouting, “He didn’t fucking do anything!”

You had to force yourself into calming down as you felt your anger causing your heart rate to rise rapidly, you took one more deep breath and then continued what you had been saying.

“Secondly, and in all seriousness, the idea of you being in here on your own makes me feel physically sick, especially since it’s your first full moon and all this crap with the Argents going on… I just wanted to be with you.” You admitted sheepishly, picking at the sleeves of your jumper to avoid his gaze.

Isaac’s heart beat picked up at your words but you couldn’t say anything as yours had too, with a soft sigh he muttered, “You don’t have to protect me.”

“I know. I know you don’t need protection, you never have. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t strength in numbers right now.” Isaac was quiet for a second before speaking up again.

“Hey, babe?” You looked up at the sound of his voice, he was giving you a soft smile that made your heart skip a beat.

“Yeah?” Isaac was shaking his head in disbelief, he let out a short chuckle and made his way across the cement floor and slid down beside you.

You watched him fondly and couldn’t help the roaring laugh that left your mouth when he leaned in close to your ear and whispered, “I’m definitely your bitch.”

*

Before either of you knew it, night had fallen and you’d begun to feel antsy. Your chest grew heavy with each noise or set of passing footsteps. You paced the cell restlessly, wringing your hands together and doing your best to disregard the feeling of dread swelling up inside of you.

It wasn’t long before Isaac was holding his head in his hands, his knee jutting in the same restless manner that you were pacing.

Growls were rising from the back of his throat and you wouldn’t lie, it was making you more than a little nervous.

You slowly approached him, proceeding with extra caution you reached out and tugged on his sleeve, hoping the action would bring him a sense of familiarity and not startle him.

Isaac’s head whipped around, his eyes glowing amber when they landed on you. “What’s happening?” He asked in a growl.

As gently as you possibly could, you moved your hands to Isaac’s cheeks and did your best to ignore his changed features.

“It’s the full moon. How are you feeling?” You kept your voice quiet, again trying to accommodate his heightened senses.

Isaac only screwed his eyes shut and clenched his jaw tightly, “Like I want to rip apart everything I see within a fifty mile radius.”

Your eyes widened and you looked at the holding area door, helplessly wishing Scott would come rushing through the door.

Isaac’s face seemed, for once, not to be comfortable in your hold as he began to growl and attempt to break out of your grip.

“No, no, no. Isaac, hey. Look at me.” The wolf reluctantly stopped wiggling and fixed his gaze on yours. Your eyes were now blazing purple and you felt your own composure slipping from your grasp.

Another gutteral sound left Isaac’s throat, his clawed hands digging into your hips for some kind of leverage. “Just keep looking at me alright… God, I don’t actually know how to do this but, uhm, just think about something that’ll keep you grounded, ok?” You told him frantically, speeding through your words as you heard the approaching footsteps of someone who was definitely not Scott or Derek.

The boy in front of you nodded his head just as the door opened. No, it didn’t open, it was practically pulled off its hinges. Effectively ruining the progress you’d made with your moon crazy boyfriend.

The man who walked in was dressed like a deputy but the gushing wound and arrow sticking out of his leg gave him away as a fake. As well as that, the gun he was pointing at Isaac gave him away as a hunter.

“Oh shit.” It was your turn to growl when Isaac broke out of your grasp. He pulled the cell door clean off, and set off towards the hunter.

Immediately, you ran behind him but before you could stop the two from killing each other, something else caught your eye. And your nose. It had taken over all of your senses, actually…

The blood leaking from his leg had you frozen on the spot, your mouth watering and mind unable to focus.

By now, Isaac had tossed the hunter aside and you weren’t sure when, but at some point Stiles had entered the room and your boyfriend was now attempting to attack your main food source.

“(Y/n)! Little help here?” Stiles cried from the floor and you tried your best to pull yourself together.

It didn’t take too much strength for you to restrain Isaac, you had one arm wrapped around his shoulders and the other around his torso, successfully holding him against your chest.

You hadn’t noticed how hungry you were in the moment, you needed to eat before someone would need to restrain you.

Pushing the hunger away you tried your best to get through to the new wolf struggling against your grip.

“Remember the thing that keeps you grounded! What was it? Tell me about it.” You tried to prompt, however as soon as Isaac attempted to respond a resounding howl filled the room.

The sudden noise had caused Isaac to cower against you. His body shook against yours, reluctantly you released him from your hold, allowing him to curl up in fear against the nearest wall.

Derek stood at the head of the room, his aura screaming for command as he glowered down at Isaac before turning his gaze to you and Stiles.

“I’m the alpha.” The Hale stated pompously.

With a questioning laugh you motioned towards the mess of the room, Isaac in wolf form shaking and whining like a kicked puppy, a mercenary bleeding and unconscious on the tiles and a very rumpled up Stiles.

“What you are is a grade A ass. Where the hell were you?” Derek stiffened at your agitated tone.

The man in question cleared his throat, his authority slipping away in the presence of your glare, “Scott & I went to scope Isaac’s house.”

“And that took you six hours?” You scoffed, kneeling down next to Isaac and running a gentle hand through the scared boy’s hair.

He whimpered at your touch, only quieting down when you transferred as much calming energy as you could manage to conjure up onto him.

It was getting harder to ignore the blood lust you were feeling, the smell of blood and Stiles’ racing pulse were beginning to cloud your mind. It wasn’t the usual hunger, though. It felt far more violent. Almost as if you’d never be able to get enough no matter how much you consumed.

“I need to leave.” You stated, standing from your spot beside Isaac and fixing Derek with a hard look, “Take Isaac somewhere safe.”

“Wait hold on, where are you going?” Derek asked sternly.

“To find some blood before I start ripping people’s throats out.” You responded bluntly, not waiting for his reply, you used your speed to leave the sheriff's station.

You found yourself in the woods. Close to the old Hale house.

There was a certain scent, you couldn’t quite place it though. It was metallic, but unlike the blood you were used to, it smelled stale.

But still, it was captivating your senses and you needed to get to the bottom of it. You couldn’t decide what was more overpowering, your hunger or your curiosity.

Impatiently, you made your way through the darkened tree line, following the scent until it led you to the building you were oh so familiar with.

The Hale house stood before you, menacing as ever and reeking of old blood.

As you walked up the porch steps, the rotten stairs creaked with every shift of weight. When you finally placed your hand on the door you realised your mistake.

What felt like a billion bolts of electricity shot through your body the second your palm met the door knob.

All of your breath left your lungs as your body hit the floor. As your legs and arms seized and convulsed on the forest floor, having rolled down the porch steps with the force of the shock, a voice sounded from out of the shadows.

“Well, well, well. Look what we have here…” The voice was old and scratchy, something like a worn out vinyl, a record that had been played so often that some of the tunes now came out as a painful drawl. “Come on, let’s get her rigged up.” The man demanded and you writhed against the many pairs of hands that began dragging you to what you assumed was some kind of van.

Your vision was blurry as you attempted to get your bearings, sitting up in the van after the doors had been forcefully slammed and you were left alone.

“Le-“ You attempted to heave out words, your attempts were fruitless though as your lungs were still devoid of any oxygen.

Frustration seemed to give you the strength you needed as you finally regained enough control over your body to yell out, a very enraged, “Let me out you bastards!”

A cynical laugh came from the head of the van, “She has a lot of spunk. You’d know she was a L/n.”

“I’m going-“ You rasped yet again, fighting against the shackles that had been placed on your wrists at some point, “To fucking rip your stupid throat out! With my teeth!”

As threatening as your words were, your wheezy, out of breath voice let you down.

“Now, now. No need for that.” He spoke, only for a voice you recognised to cut him off.

“I’m starting to think this wasn’t the best idea.” It was Chris Argent. You forced yourself to move as close to the front of the van as your shackles would allow.

“What exactly do you plan on doing with an innocent seventeen year old, Mr.Argent?” You drawled, the electricity almost completely out of your system, your lungs finally working at their usual capacity again.

When the hunter didn’t grace you with a response, and you figured you couldn’t do much else right in the moment, you decided you’d poke the proverbial bear.

“You tried to kill my boyfriend tonight… it’d be a real shame if I had to retaliate.”

“Shut it.” Chris said, his voice unamused, bordering on nervous.

Bored, you clicked your tongue, “No, I don’t think I will. Anyway, unless you want me to go into graphic detail about how I’m going to disembowel both of you when I get out, tell me why you’re kidnapping me.”

The old man chimed in then, “Because you, little girl, are an abomination.”

“And you, old decrepit asshole, are getting on my last nerve. Give me a straight answer before I make you give me a straight answer.” You tugged violently at the chains, loosening them from the metal wall, to convey your point.

“Brute force will get you nowhere, little wolf.” Wolf? There was your opening. They didn’t have a clue about you.

Deciding you couldn’t give away your only edge, you played into their delusions, “Where was that a few hours ago when you sent a hitman to put down a seventeen year old boy who's never done anything worse than miss an assignment?”

He scoffed then, “No matter how sweet you think you are. You wolves are all the same. You’re all killers.”

A laugh left the back of your throat, “Are you senile or something? Last time I checked you hunter dickheads were the ones killing people.”

“That’s enough, we’re done talking.” Chris asserted, you couldn’t see either of the men you’d been speaking to but you could imagine their clenched jaws at your statement.

With a smirk you kept talking, “You killed, what was it? Oh yes. All of the Hale’s. Cora was only a little older than me at the time, Kate torched the house five years ago so that would have made Cora twelve years old when she was burned alive.”

You paused for a second, allowing your anger to seep off of you and onto them. “Tell me… what monstrosities could a twelve year old girl have committed?”

“This is your last warning.” Chris grumbled and you ignored him yet again.

“All of these broken morals lead me to wonder; what would precious Alison think of all of this? Maybe I’ll ask her at school on Monday.” You tormented the men, readying yourself to make a break for it as you felt the van slow down.

Quietly, or as quietly as you possibly could, you freed your wrists from their shackles. Shakily you stood up and then you waited.

When the door opened you fixed the two men who were looking at you in mild shock with a smirk, “Hi.”

“How did you… those shackles were doused in mistletoe.” At the old man's shock your smirk broadened. It was something you had found out from both Damon Salvatore and Deaton. Mistletoe only weakened wolves, not vampires.

With a coy shrug you shot them a wink, “I’d really love to stay and chat but, I have homework.” With that you began to run, but the older man caught your forearm before you got a clean break.

And normally, his amount of strength wouldn’t have been able to stop you, what was really hindering your movement was the dagger he had logged in your abdomen.

Your eyes were wide and you let out a pathetic squeal of pain when he twisted the knife in your stomach, his voice was menacing as he spoke, “You’re not going anywhere.” He spat out in your face, hand firm on the dagger.

“Yes. I. Am.” You seethed through gritted teeth, containing the blood that was filling your mouth.

Using whatever strength you could muster, you threw the man away from you and took off running, the dagger still lodged in your abdomen.

When you were sure you were far enough away, you fell to your knees.

Taking a shaky breath you looked around the street you’d landed on. You weren’t sure where you were and your phone was lying abandoned on the floor of the woods. It was times like this you wish you had a howl.

Then as if it was some incredible mirage, driving down the street was a light blue jeep. “Stiles!” You screamed at the top of your lungs, dragging yourself to the edge of the road.

“Stiles! Stiles please!” You cried out, letting out a breath of relief when the jeep stopped only a few meters from you.

Within seconds Stiles was sprinting over to you, sliding the rest of the way on his knees and cupping your face with a terrified expression, “Y/n!? What hap- hu- oh dear god!” He tried his best not to gag when he noticed that you were literally impaled.

“Ok. Ok. No what happened? Wait no. Right not important.” The boy rambled and you let him lead you as he picked you up from the dirt and placed you laying down across the back seat of his jeep.

Stiles drove like a madman to the hospital, wincing when you’d whimper and muttering apologies when you’d let out a cry.

“I think you would’ve been really proud of how I handled that situation.” You jested weakly from your spot, Stiles looked at you briefly in disbelief.

“What? By getting stabbed?” He shot back.

You offered him a faint giggle, “Nah, you shoulda heard me, Sty. I was such a snarky bitch.”

“So that’s how the stabbing thing happened. Got it.”

Only a few more minutes passed before you’d arrived at the hospital. Stiles had practically dragged you in and you couldn’t help the mewls of agony you were letting out as he passed you off to Melissa.

“What the hell happened?” She screeched and all you could offer in response was a blood filled cough, causing Melissa to nod her head in understanding, “Right. Questions later.”

*

Aimlessly you looked around for something, anything.

You were in complete darkness, but your body stood tall and seemingly healthy, no sign of any kind of wound.

A dull, yellow light shone in the distance. Cautiously, you took a step forward and it was only then that you knew where you were.

Under your feet, which were devoid of any shoes or socks, wet leaves crunched under your weight and you found yourself, yet again, standing in front of the Hale house.

It looked how it usually did, sad and decolate. However, what was unusual was that dull light shining through one of the partially melted windows.

Humming sounded from the home, hitting your ears in perfect pitch. It brought a wave of calmness over you, tranquilizing your fears as you twisted the knob that had once sent you into a horrific shock.

The rotten hardwood cooled your feet as you shuffled thoughtlessly through the house which you used to view as a home away from home.

“You put up a great fight.” A deep voice spoke from inside the lit room.

The voice was unmistakable, but you knew that there was only one explanation for why you were hearing it. For as long as you could, you wanted to hold onto your naivety.

“Who's there?” You called in response while small steps carried you closer and closer to the room.

The voice let out a chuckle, “I think you already know.”

Finally, you arrived in the room. Confronting the voice you knew all too well.

“Good to see you again, sweetheart.” You saw his face then, standing charred and battered like a fallen angel was Peter Hale.

The sob that fell from you was impossible to stop, you didn’t waste another second, you threw yourself at the man in front of you. A teary smile found your face when he welcomed you with open arms, his arms wrapped tightly around you as you cried into his shoulder.

“Quiet now, no more tears.” He said, pulling away from you, his thumb brushing under your eye gently, sweeping the falling teardrops away.

With a sniffle you looked at your surroundings before returning your gaze to Peter, “Am I dead?” You asked meekly.

Oddly enough, you felt accepting of it. Liked it, almost. It was quiet here- wherever here was.

“Temporarily.” He answered, guiding you further into the room. It had a single lightbulb hanging from the ceiling and two wooden chairs sat vacant underneath it. “Have a seat.”

Doing as told, you sat down on the chair opposite Peter. “Where are we?” You questioned, the silence, although peaceful, was overwhelming.

Peter gave you a small grin, gesturing to the room around you, “Purgatory.” He answered simply.

He stared at you then, a look in his eyes you recognised but, for the first time since you’d turned, you couldn’t feel it. It was something akin to sadness. It held love too, though.

“The next part is the hardest. When you wake up you won’t have a clue how you got there. You’ll be starving and all you’ll want to do is start tearing people apart.” He explained and your stomach dropped.

You were going to wake up and complete the transition, you’d be a fully fledged vampire and all because of some stupid knife wound.

“I won’t remember being dead?”

Peter shook his head, “You’ll remember this part, not the actual passing over part though.”

A tear slipped from your eye and you forced yourself to take in a shaky breath, “Passing over to where?”

Peter shrugged, “Don’t know. I’ve never gotten that far; too much unfinished business.” He tried to lighten the mood, but he realised there was no use as he noticed your breathing pick up and your eyes fill with tears yet again.

“You’re strong, you’ll be perfectly fine. You are my beta, after all.” He soothed, moving his chair so it would be next to yours.

You let out a croaky laugh at that, “I haven’t been strong. I’ve been drowning ever since you bit me, I haven’t done much other than fight with myself.”

“Not true. I’ve been keeping an eye on you. Keeping Derek under control is a job not everyone is up for, but you’re doing it like it’s nothing. Although, you’d be doing a lot better if I had gotten to you before Derek ripped by throat out.” He muttered the last part, obviously not happy with your trip to Mystic Falls.

“Damon told me you used to drink together.” You recalled with a smile, distracting yourself from the future of impending darkness.

Peter laughed at the memory but didn’t speak.

The dense silence returned, not for long though, distantly you heard shouts. They were more like pleads really. Or were they screams?

“Y/n! Can you hear me? Y/n! Y/n!”

Softly, you turned your head towards the doorway, the hallway light was turned on now too, “Someone’s calling me.”

Peter stood up, a heavy grief filled sigh falling from him as he offered you his hand and pulled you to your feet when you took it. “It’s almost time. But not just yet, there's one last thing you need to do.”

“What is it?” You asked, not sure if you wanted to know the answer.

Peter pulled you close, placed a kiss to the top of your head then began guiding you, arm tightly wrapped around your shoulder.

He answered you solemnly, blue eyes sparkling with unwanted wisdom, “You have to say goodbye.”

[earthfire-75]

Kashmir

Chapter One, Part Two: Kashmir (The Trick is to Keep Breathing)

Author’s notes: co-written with @nature-and-music , beta-ed by @lady-jane-revisited

A lopsided smile tugged at his lips, “I’ll get them for you.”

“No thank you Robert, Grant gave me the money and I’ll pay for it.”

“Oh please, just one of them then?”

I shook my head, “No it’s fine. Besides, we need to head back.”

He pursed his lips and huffed, “Alright, if you say so.”

The purchase was completed and it was time to head out, however Robert was speaking to the woman behind the counter; or flirting no less. She nodded her head and wrote something down on a note by the dresses that he brought to her.

“Thank you darlin’, have a pleasant rest of your day.”

I chuckled, “Giving her the number to your hotel room?”

“Not exactly, Anjelika. Come on we better hurry, the party’s going to start soon and you still need to do your hair and makeup,” he informed.

Somewhere along the line, we lost the other three band members. Robert took me to the hotel they were staying at, figuring they would all meet up there anyway. He let me borrow his bathroom to change and do my hair and makeup.

“What kind of party is it? Formal or informal?”

“Well, I’m wearing a suit, if that helps?”

I rolled my eyes. “Ok.” I picked out the longer dress and started getting ready. I could hear Robert rummaging around in the other room and assumed he was doing the same. I just finished when Robert knocked on the door.

“I need the mirror, love. Gotta comb out my hair and beard.”

I flung the door open, grabbing the comb from the counter. “Don’t you dare take a comb to those curls! Tell me you have a pick.”

He swallowed. “Technically? I left it at home?”

I didn’t say anything else, but grabbed his hand and pulled him out to the common room and to the couch. I then sat, pulling him down next to me. It was then I noticed what suit he was wearing, and still with his beard. Fuck! He wasn’t yet wearing the jacket, but he had the vest on and the top two or three bottoms of his shirt were left undone. Now it was my turn to swallow hard as I leaned in with the comb to fix his beard. Then I started to run my fingers through his hair carefully.

“If you forget your pick again, use your fingers, not a comb or brush. You could ruin your curls otherwise.”

“I’ll remember that.”

“Good. Now, we should probably get going.”

We both stood and, as Robert grabbed his jacket from the arm of the couch, we left the hotel room and headed downstairs. “The party is being held in the hotel restaurant,” Robert informed me.

At first, the party seemed more like a meet and greet with the other roadies and their tour manager, who seemed unimpressed that I was “some bird” Jimmy picked up off the street. But none of the boys were having it. Robert happily reassured the crew that I was indeed more than “some bird,” that in fact I was assigned to be a part of the touring as well. To be equipped with the behind the scene matters and the roadies would simply need to learn to live with this sudden change. Being the new kid in town was never easy, and I was feeling beyond self conscious about this, however I had to keep my intrusive thoughts at bay. New learning opportunities would be coming up and it was all a matter of learning the ropes. Even if a fair amount of the crew thought of me as another to be shared among the members of the band, especially with Robert since he had locked arms with me.

The party started off fairly quiet at first as we all sat down at our tables to listen to a congratulatory speech from Grant. He had nothing but high expectations for everyone involved and that this tour would be bigger and heavier than the previous one. I felt a hand touch my lap and I followed the arm to see Robert’s concerned expression. I gave him a little smile to reassure him that I was alright. The last thing that I needed to do was interrupt Peter in the middle of his talk, and right before my first day no less.

A line was formed as everyone made their way to be serviced by the chefs. All manner of succulent cuts of meat, freshly cooked fish, bubbling champagne, and assorted hors d'oeuvres were ready to be served. Everything looked so delicious and oh so appetizing, I just simply couldn’t believe my eyes. As we stood in line, I overheard Jonesy and Jimmy mention something, although it was hard to hear amongst the chatter of Robert talking to Bonzo.

“How do you suppose they’ll feel about touring?” Jimmy asked.

Jonesy shrugged, “Well, hopefully their antics won’t take away from the show. And your guitars won’t get demolished as well.”

Jimmy scowled, “If he even thinks about touching any of my guitars, I’ll bash his head in!”

“If you do, she’ll end up giving you a black eye. You know that she has a bit of a ‘short’ temper,” the bassist chuckled. “Besides, I wouldn’t worry about it.”

“Well you're the bass guitar player, none of your things will be obliterated,” Jimmy whined.

Bonzo joined in, “Not unless a certain someone decides to shove a cherry bomb in the strings.”

Jonesy smiled and rolled his eyes, “Well I suppose I’ll just need to stand close to Thunderfingers won’t I?”

Guitars being destroyed? Cherry bombs? My curiosity peaked, however I didn’t want to interrupt their conversation. At least not until I knew a little more of what or who they were referring to. We made our way to the table and enjoyed our delicious food and sparkling drinks. The champagne flowed like rain down our throats as the appetizing meals made our mouths water. A few questions were directed to me regarding how I was feeling about the new job and I answered honestly.

I smiled meekly, “Well I’m very excited about this. This is going to be something different for me for sure, but I’ll do my best.”

“You will darlin’, you will,” Robert smirked as he patted my hand. “So how long have you been playing and singing?”

“Well, for a while actually. I just picked up a few lessons from my dad and just… learned a bit on my own.”

Jimmy noted, “I did a bit of session work when I was a lad. Learned a few things myself along the way.”

Robert butted in, “Well I hope we can hear more of your singing and playing while on tour. I think you’ll sound wonderful, and the audience will love it.”

I felt myself clam up a bit at the prospect of playing before a live audience, even though it was a touching notion on Robert’s part. I didn’t think it was necessary to get myself even more involved than necessary, especially since a fair amount of the road crew weren't exactly pleased with me being here. I gave Robert a little smile and a shrug and let him know that we could put that idea on the back burner.

“I’m curious though…who were the three of you talking about earlier? You mentioned something about guitars being destroyed?” I asked. I had hoped they would have said more by now, but since they hadn’t and my curiosity was getting the better of me…I had to ask.

Jonesy laughed a little. “Interesting wording. We were talking about another band who will be touring with us. Interestingly enough, they are called The Who. They’ve got a habit of destroying their equipment. Jimmy was concerned it might spill over to ours as well.”

I know of them, of course and of that particular habit, though I had thought they had stepped doing so by this time. Then again, it's a different universe, likely also a different timeline. “I see,” I said instead. Looking at Bonzo, I got his attention. It was as good a time as any to talk to him, but I didn’t know what the other boys knew.

“Bonzo? Can we talk? Alone?”

“Uh, sure. Looks like there’s a spot at the bar surprisingly clear of people.”

We got up from the table and walked over to the bar, ordering ourselves a drink before I started the conversation, but Bonzo beat me to it.

“So…yer a Nightbane too?” He asked with such nonchalance.

“Yeah, I am. So are you. Do they know?”

“Yeah, they do. Rob found out first. He was there during my Becoming. Scared the daylights out of ‘im, but it was like he still knew it was me. Jimmy found it ‘fascinating’. Jonesy took it the worst, almost left the band when he first found out. But he came around.”

I nodded in acknowledgment and downed my drink. How did the fact that they all knew Bonzo was a Nightbane make it both a relief and up my anxiety about them finding out I was one too? Would they be able to accept the creature beneath as easily as they had with Bonzo? Granted my other form wasn’t monstrous in the traditional sense, yet, I still worried it would scare them off at best.

Bonzo smiles a little. “Don’t worry, Jonesy might freak out a little, but I really don’t think you need to worry about Rob and Jimmy at all.”

“Thanks, Bonzo.”

Someone cleared their throat behind us and we turned to see Robert. “Sorry to interrupt your conversation, but the other bands just showed up. I thought you might like to meet them, Anjelika.”

He stepped to the side and I found the members of The Who standing there, looking at me. I knew each of them by name and face, even as they introduced themselves, though I did a double take as my eyes landed on the shortest member. There, with the same blue eyes I had seen so many times before, was a very feminine looking Roger Daltrey. Now I know I’m not in my own universe…

“Rogina Daltrey,” she introduced herself to me, her blue eyes never leaving mine.

“Anjelika,” I responded back with a smile and she in return gave me a smirk.

“Bonzo!” Keith uttered, a drink in one hand as he hugged his fellow drummer, “You gained a few stones since last I saw you.”

Bonzo rolled his eyes as he chortled, holding his head in a strong arm grip. Keith complained that his champagne would fall out, but that didn’t stop Bonzo from treating him like a sibling. “Moonie, why don’t you and the lads say hello to our new friend here, yeah?”

John and Pete made their acquaintances, Keith was able to give her a little wave of his hand until Bonzo finally let him go and gave him a good slap on the back.

“You’ll have to excuse Keith, he’s a bit loonie as you can see,” Pete explained. “So what brings you here?”

“Well I’ll be going on tour with the band, and it looks like I’ll be seeing you four as well.”

Rogina interjected, “Is that right? What will you be doing?”

“A roadie, so I’ll be around helping with getting everything ready,” I mentioned.

“She might even do a bit of performing as well,” Robert mentioned proudly.

I was silent as The Who stared at me, my throat becoming dry. I tried to play off his comment as a joke, “Good one Robert. He’s just kidding-”

Rogina tilted her head as she looked at me, “Are you sure? Because if you can sing, we’d love to hear you.”

My heart was pounding, all I could give her was an unsure shrug, “Um, another time… maybe. Say why do you all go get something to eat, the food is very delicious here.”

Keith was already off to find himself a plate, with John closing in behind him. Pete kept himself occupied with discussing business matters with Jimmy and Grant. Rogina on the other hand decided to stay and talk a bit more. Everything about this Roger was pretty much the same: The height, the golden corkscrew curls, ocean blue eyes, toothy grin, muscular arms, and stylish clothing. Still it was odd speaking with her, considering the obvious factors such as a slightly higher register in her voice and the presence of breasts that protruded from her suit.

“So how did you manage to work with Zeppelin?” Rogina asked.

I tried to answer as best as I could, “Oh well… you see Jimmy let me know that a spot was available actually.” I wasn’t sure why I couldn’t tell her that Jimmy had found me like an abandoned cat in an alleyway that he felt sorry for. A little of me to say, but still I couldn’t seem to add that in.

“Is it true what Robert said about you performing? I mean you seemed awfully quiet when he brought it up.”

I sighed at the question, barely keeping myself from pinching the bridge of my nose. “I’m quickly learning that Robert's a little like a puppy…very excitable. I played a little bit for them to prove that I know what I’m doing with the guitars. Something came over me and I sang a little bit too. I never agreed to playing in front of anyone else. Let alone in front of a huge audience.”

Rogina’s smile softened at that. “He really is, though I’m sorry to hear you won’t be playing. The offer is always open and I meant what I said, I'd love to hear from you. if you change your mind.”

I returned her smile and I knew I was going to love this version of Roger too. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

G made his way over with a couple other people, one looked vaguely familiar, the other I didn’t recognize. “Anjelika! I want to introduce you to Ahmet Ertegun, owner of Atlantic Records. He’s here to support the boys. And this is Alice Cooper, joining us on the American leg of the tour.”

Both men stuck a hand out for me to shake. I took Ahmet’s first who placed his other hand over mine gently. “I must thank you for joining the road crew, dear. Though, I must admit, I was shocked to hear you were a woman. Forgive me, I mean no offense, it’s just never been done before.”

I smiled at Ahmet, trying not to take offense. It may be a different universe, but apparently the ‘70’s were still the ‘70’s. Turning to Alice, I shook his hand next, barely recognizing him without the makeup.

“I don’t know if shocked is the word I would have used, but I guess I am a little surprised. Didn’t figure I’d see a female roadie for another decade at least. Don’t get me wrong, I love that women are getting more and more involved in rock. And if anyone gives you any shit, just say the word.”

My smile grew wider at Alice’s genuine words. “Thank you, I appreciate that. Though, I assure you, I can handle myself.”

“I’m certain you can, but the offer is still on the table. I would like to stay and get to know you a little more, but I need to get back to my girlfriend. It was nice meeting you, Anjelika.”

“I’m sure there will be time to get to know each other more on the road and it was nice to meet you too.”

“Fair enough. See you tomorrow, then.” And with that he was off. G and Ahmet soon excused themselves to go talk to the boys and I was left at the bar once more with Rogina next to me.

Rogina sighed, “I know this must be all new to you. Believe me that being a woman involved in rock and roll seems to weird people out, especially guys.”

I gave her a reassuring grin, “Yeah, I’m sure you probably have gone through a lot.”

Rogina took a sip of her flute, “I may have a few stories. One of them involves Keith actually.”

I leaned in, “What happened?”

“Well let’s just say he thought that he could get away with copping a feel. He lost a couple of teeth that night,” Rogina chuckled. “The bastard will never live that moment down.”

I wasn’t sure if I could share a laugh with Rogina, even though she was able to find humor in such a terrible situation. All I could muster was a nervous smile and a nod.

Rogina took another sip of her champagne, rested her head on her palm, and pondered, “So is this your first time working with Zeppelin?”

“Yes actually. And I hope that I’ll do alright while on tour,” I admitted.

“I think you will,” Rogina claimed with a warm smile. “So what would you like to drink? The champagne is alright, but I think I’ll get a whiskey instead.”

I was taken aback, “Oh well… a beer sounds good.”

Truthfully, a Nightbane could easily drink any of these mortals under the table. As to how I would do against Bonzo, a fellow Nightbane, well that would be a matter for another day. Still I was grateful knowing that Bonzo could understand, and hopefully the remainder of Zeppelin, Who, and Cooper would as well. However it was too early to let the rest of them know. In time I would say something, only when the moment felt right.

As we waited for our drinks, I felt a strange looming presence behind me. My throat went dry the moment I turned around to see John Entiwistle, the Ox himself, towering over the two of us. Rogina on the other hand casually remarked, “I thought you were supposed to be babysitting our dear boy.”

“Well quite frankly I need a break from him,” John mentioned with a deep chortle. “I think as long as nothing blows up tonight, he’ll tire himself out eventually.” He gestured to the bartender and asked for a glass of cognac.

Rogina nodded and asked him, “Where did Pete go?”

“Probably talking some poor bastard’s ear off about Lifehouse,” he laughed.

“Oh come on John, the man just wants to share his work to the world,” Rogina noted.

John leaned in towards me, “She says that, but even she gets tired of his songs about teenage angst.”

Rogina scowled at him, “I do not.”

John raised his eyebrows, “Keep telling yourself that Rog. It was Anjelika right?”

I nodded, “Yes John.”

He responded with a handshake, “Pleasure to meet you.”

“And you as well”, I responded with a return of his handshake. “I take Keith's handful?”

Rogina and John laughed. “That’s putting it mildly some days.” John admitted.

“I swear the man can’t not cause trouble in some fashion or another for even a few hours.” Rogina adds.

“I think there’s some unspoken rule that drummers are all crazy,” I chuckled.

“That explains everything, actually.” John said with a chuckle of his own. Rogina just shook her head.

I looked up to see the time on a clock on the wall. Midnight. Where had the time gone? “I should head up to get some sleep, I want to be up early to grab a few things I forgot earlier today from the drug store across the way. Besides, I’m assuming the roadies will be up earlier than the bands to pack up the buses.” Downing the last of my beer, I shook John’s hand again. “It was nice meeting you.” I set the empty bottle on the bar and left a few bills before turning to Rogina. “Thank you for the beer.”

She surprised me by pulling me into a hug instead of giving me a handshake. “Any time. And I’ll add to what Alice said earlier. Anyone gives you any trouble, let me know, I’ll kick their ass.”

“Thank you. But I really need to go.” With that I went to find G to figure out where I would sleep tonight. I found him still with the boys, though it appeared that Ahmet had left. I explained to G that I wanted to get to bed and why, but it was Robert who interjected.

“You can stay in my room for tonight,” Robert offered. “The rest of your things are still there from earlier.”

I had forgotten about that. Hesitantly I nodded in agreement, even if I was worried about what the other roadies, especially Cole, might say. “Alright, as long as this doesn’t become a habit. Just for tonight.”

I could see the disappointment behind Robert’s eyes, but he agreed. “Here, take my key, just leave the door unlocked so I can get in later.”

Nodding, I took the key and thanked him before heading upstairs to the room, getting as comfortable on the couch as I could.

@brownskinsugarplum76 @m-faithfull @jimmys-zeppelin @lady-jane-revisited @firethatgrewsolow @salixfragilis @timetraveller4 @callmethehunter @tremble-and-shake @tophats-n-lespauls @princesspagey @tangerine-page

[missallsundayyy]

PRETEND

LAW AND ROBIN HAS BEEN LIVING RENT FREE IN MY HEAD FOR MONTHS I JUST HAVE TO KEEP WRITING BOUT THEM UNTIL IM SATISFIED🍂🍂

“Nico-ya” Trafalgar Law walked towards the now sun tanning archeologist. He won't tell this to anybody but the StrawHat pirates' Archeologist had captured his attention from the very start. Her captivating looks aside, her charm, calm and collected personality trait made her stand out from the rest of her crew. Amongst the rowdy and incendiary of her nakamas she was more sensible, wise, smart and nubile in every way. Okay maybe he was just being biased but he certainly would rather be around Nico Robin more than anyone else right now.

Robin turned to see the captain of the Heart pirates and their now trusted ally. “Law-kun?” she acknowledged him with a smile. Something about the introverted man provoked her thoughts often and she was still deciding if she liked it or not.

“I'd like to discuss something with you before we reach Dressrosa” He said, trying hard not to stare at her very exposed body. He admit that she was a very attractive woman.

“Dressrosa is known as a country of love and affection and while I am a very wanted man once I step foot there. We all need disguises and roles once we reach there.”

“Where are you going with this?” Robin asked

“I'd like us to pretend that we’re married when we reach Dressrosa” Law spit his words out as fast as he could, trying to hide the embarrassment on his face. He was basically asking the most attractive woman he’d ever met to play pretend in an intimate way.

Robin was taken aback by his proposal and she had anticipated anything but that.

“Fufufufu, don't you think our navigator, Nami would be more suitable for this role, Law-kun?”

Law frowned at her assumption, why would she think that the loud and violent woman would be a good partner for him.

“I rather not..choose..her” Law said, “No offence”

“If i would be of help then of course i don't mind roleplaying with you Law-kun but I have to warn you that i might be boring company to you.” a teasing tone laced her reply,

“Rest assured i think you’re far from boring Nico-ya”

TIME SKIP

“Will this outfit be okay?” Robin came out of the room that she and Law had booked to share.

Law looked at the woman before him and wondered what magic she had cast upon him, never was he so attracted to a woman nor was he EVER easily awed. He wasn’t interested in this particular thing anyway so why was he so intrigued by Nico Robin of all people.

“Yes, you look good. Now let's go. We’ll be making a stop at a tavern to get some information about the guards here.”

Robin and Law left their room and went to walk in town and right away she noticed his awkwardness by how his body language was so stiff.

“ Am I making you uncomfortable Law-kun?” Robin asked concerned, she was starting to be insecure and thought that he definitely should have chosen Nami instead.

“Wha? What! No!” he stuttered. “It’s just I'm not around women, ever.”

Robin laughed from relief, “Well if we’re supposed to be married we should act more like a couple right?” with that she closed all the gap between both of them and took his arms and interlocked it with hers. Law’s eyes widened at her actions and the fact that his arms was literally squeezed against her big breasts

“Oi! Whaa”

“Oh look! That's' the tavern, it's quite big isn’t it.” Robin interrupted him and proceeded to drag the captain towards the building.

“It looks like where all the ruffians would gather” he replied

IN THE TAVERN

Law was about to dissect all the men in the tavern, if he thought the strawhat’s cook was terrible these men were 100 times worse.

“Are you alone beautiful? Why not you join me and my men back there!” a sluggish man slumped himself beside Robin. She ignored his presence entirely to which the man didn't take kindly for it.

“Oi woman you either sit with us willingly or I'll drag you there personally and make you into our crew’s slave.” he threatened.

“I’m sorry mister but..” Robin stood up and leaned against where Law was sitting, he had already gripped his sword ready to cut him to pieces. Robin settled in on Law and sat down on his lap to his fucking surprise.  “I’m married  and my husband will cut you into thousands of  pieces if you insist on talking to me that way, am i right dear?”  Robin turned and gave him the sweetest smile she could and he played along with her, kinda.

“If you don't leave my sight now I'll scatter your body parts across the New World.”

It took Law one look to send the barbaric man scurrying away muttering strings of curses.

“You’re such a protective husband, thank you Law-kun” Robin said and gave him a kiss across the cheek. Law blushed profusely and gave her an astounded look  “Ara….looks like i got carried away with our acting, my apologies Law-kun fufufu”

"You seem to enjoy yourself Nico-ya but I don't mind it if it's with you." he said cooly regaining his composure.

"In fact i'm glad that it's you Law-kun. Bar-tender, keep the drinks coming for my husband” a smirk formed onto his face.

Things were going to get ugly soon he might as well enjoy himself as much as he could. What an amazing way to be doing so with the one and only Nico Robin. He returned her play and wrapped one arm around her waist while she stayed put comfortably on his lap. He buried his face in her neck and breathed the floral scent that she naturally has.

Perfect, even if it is temporary.

[jamestrmtx]

Fairytale Complex - [Undertale | Sans x Reader]

[Gender Neutral, Frisk's Parent Reader | Slow Burn]

Chapter Sixteen | Dummy! (Part 2 of 3)

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When you're done freshening up, dinner's already underway. The scent of vegetables and broth hits your nose, and the cold temperature left behind by the storm brings forth an additional hint as to what the monster's cooking up for dinner. You try to stay soundless as you sneak off to the kitchen and stand behind him, looking over his shoulder when you make it there.

"I can tell you're here, pal," Sans says, chuckling. 

He turns to you with a spoon held out in his hand. There's a sample of soup on it, waiting to be tested. The scent reminds you of having missed lunch break due to the stormy weather, with the hours it lasted bringing forth your boss's decision to call the rest of your shift off. You were supposed to be at your last meeting by now, but the rain and wind had proven to be superior, canceling all plans. Less work meant less pay, though you try to refrain yourself from worrying too much about that right now. "Taste it." He offers it out to you, still waiting. You, on the other hand, take a while to do anything, overthinking the situation as you then debate on whether to grab the spoon or taste it right off his hand. The first option had the risk of you brushing hands with the monster and spilling the soup in the process, yet tasting it right off his hand was almost unthinkable to do. 

Another thought pops into your mind, and that's whether it was fine to trust the skeleton by tasting the food and giving him the benefit of the doubt about it not being tampered with. Though you knew him for a few months now, it's still impossible not to acknowledge a possibility like that one. If a man you'd known for so many years had ended up leaving you, only to make a scene like yesterday's when trying to get back with you, who's to say a stranger with customs far different from yours wouldn't do something similar -- or worse?

You remind yourself of your main and original task: confronting him and the rest of the monsters over the choices they made back at the Underground, regardless of how charming and kind they were being with you currently. Sans was no less of an exception. This wasn't only for Frisk's safety and their overall state of well-being, but for your reputation as their parent -- and for your peace of mind, too.

You figure you've taken too long based on how the skeleton backs the spoon away.

His grin widens, and he then sips the contents off the spoon, leaving it empty. "I promise it ain't poisoned." He gives his back to you as he goes to wash the spoon, offering it to you after it's been cleaned. "You can taste it now." Sans moves aside, creating space for you to step forward and scoop a bit of the soup still bubbling in the pot.

Just as you're about to eat it though, he says, "I'm not the best cook around, so go ahead and lemme know if it tastes funny." 

A smile forms on your face when you hear that, captivated by the idea of him having no clue how to begin cooking, and even more considering he was at your home instead of his. If it was often difficult for beginners to cook in the familiarity of their own home, you can't imagine how it must feel doing that at another person's place. For a moment, you wish you could've seen him in the process of cooking, an opportunity you'd lost while you went off to shower and change.

When you taste it, what's missing drops into your thoughts; years of having cooked at home reveal the capability of identifying that quickly. You consider the suggestion and confirm what the soup's lacking when you clean up the spoon and take a second sample off the pot. "It's good," you say, setting it aside. "Just needs a bit of salt and more time to stew. The rest is fine."

"Thanks," he replies, hands going back to his pockets. "Paps wants to improve his cooking, so I figured I've gotta better mine some more before I teach 'im anything."

Again, your mind finds itself in a conflict. While it's charmed by the thoughtfulness of that comment, it's also clouded by the morose reminder of why you'd asked him to stay for dinner in the first place. To distract yourself, you add the missing ingredient to the soup and walk with Sans to the couch while it finishes boiling.

It feels strange to sit so far apart from each other, but he doesn't close off the distance, nor do you.

You prop a leg over the other and rest a hand over your knee, bouncing the one on the floor when you lack anything more to say. Your thoughts scramble around as you try to find a way to make the situation less awkward. When you glance back at him, you see it's something he also seems to want to end; your gaze meets with his when you both decide to look at each other's side -- synchronizing.

He shifts closer and you do the same, continuing until your hands touch.

Almost immediately, you pull back, yet your gaze remains locked with his, eyes drifting down to his teeth. Even as he gets nearer, you stay put, lost in your thoughts and the risky scenario unfolding. Your brain and heart scream at you to stop; your body -- conversely -- refuses to move out of its current spot and rebels by inching closer to him, until you're near enough to catch the scent of the only soap brand you often bought for showering: soft-scented, cheap, and antibacterial. It's strange to catch that aroma from someone other than yourself. Frisk preferred using a different kind, making the situation much more intimate than you would like it to feel.

You grab his hand again as he leans into you, only stopping himself when your back presses against the armrest. Then, he pulls his hand back and uses both to hold your shoulders and corner you right into place. Height difference makes it so that his legs stay knelt on the couch while yours hang off it, these tucked aside as you focus on the matter at hand. He brings himself closer as he tries to level out your heights, grip on you staying. The sound of your heart and of the soup simmering by the kitchen are the only two other things to keep your mind occupied from what's happening; anticipation makes your breaths waver.

As if the situation couldn't get tense enough, the door of the living room opens and in barge two people, leaving you in an iced state. 

Rather than Frisk and Toriel, it's Frisk and Jerry who stand at the frame, one casting a look of betrayal at the monster while the other scrutinizes the scene. You try standing up, yet the monster's hands hold you back, body held up over yours -- still cornered. His face reveals nothing but conflict, an expression similar to your state of mind regarding how freely to act with him. 

Jerry leaves without a word and shuts the door too slow for it to even click. Frisk does the rest of the job for him by locking it, checking it again, and saying nothing themselves as they look at you in the eye and sign, "Can we talk later, ren?"

Still in a tough position, you nod once, lacking strength or words to say anything out loud. 

Sans doesn't move even as Frisk disappears into the hallway.

You see his irises falter when you look at him; his gaze isn't fully there. A few drops of sweat are present on his forehead, and you can feel his hands grow colder with each second. "...Are you okay, Sans?" you ask, voice faint. "I, um... I think the soup should be ready now."

You hope that's enough to snap him out of it, only to have that contradicted when his hold on you stays. "I'm sorry, (Y/N)," he mutters, huffing, "I failed you."

Sans moves back while you sit up straight; silence returns. He stands up and goes to turn off the stove, all done within more time than you would expect as he chooses to stay there a few more minutes, staring aimlessly at the kitchen's wares. You rest your hands on your knees, and you wait to see what he does next. There's not much you can do now that you were caught in a moment like that one, and there's no time to beat yourself up over it, either. All you can do's admit your blame where it best seemed fit, and that was in letting your inner voice act before you. You'd given it your strongest efforts to wait until your first year of college to date Jerry, only to then wait until you had a stabler job by your second semester to actually do anything more serious with him, and later waited six more years alone, watching as Frisk grew up in your care for most of the time, only to let your wants show through now of all times.

Excuse through excuse -- be it valid or not -- you'd restricted yourself at every moment you saw possible.

All that, and yet it still felt as if you hadn't done enough.

You wanted to be stronger. 

"Frisk told me 'bout your situation," Sans says, distracting you from your thoughts. "Not whatever happened with Jerry, but the way you see monsters, and well… me, in general." He turns away from the kitchen and sits back down on the couch, looking directly at you, though for wholly different reasons than earlier ago. His hand stays over yours, more comforting than sultry. Were you to know him for any longer, you would've assumed he's holding his soul on his sleeve, yet you remind yourself he's still a stranger. "Maybe this's my habits showin' up, but if I were to judge you based on what they told me, I'd say you're labeling yourself as the bad guy." His fingers intersect with yours, squeezing your palm. "Of all the things I've gotten to learn about you, this's one of the least you should be blamin' yourself for. If anything, you're not exactly the only one responsible for all that's been happenin' right now."

Your breaths grow tighter the longer you keep listening to him. Your heart's racing again, yet it's not the same as before. The monster lets your hand go, continuing with, "I can't tell you just how different we are from each other, and how much I wish I had a fraction the amount of willpower you and your kid have." He sighs; a hint of a smile shows despite the furrow in his gaze. "You've got some things right about me, and one of 'em's havin' chosen to act too late. Being unable to be there for those I care about, more specifically." His nose cavity flares as he lets out a stifled laugh, remorse showing in spite of his best efforts not to let that happen. "I hate who I used to be, and even now, I still feel like I could've done more. I wanna try harder, but I don't have a clue on where to start with that."

Sans tries to stand up, yet fails to. He heaves out a breath as he closes his eye sockets and surrenders himself back on the couch; he rests his elbow over the armrest and lets his chin rest on his hand. After that, he looks back to your side, an apologetic gaze showing as his grin widens and his crease deepens, the way his monster anatomy worked allowing him to further display similar movements to that of a human narrowing their gaze. "Keep taking credit where it's due, (Y/N). And when you've got somethin' you want to improve, try your best to overcome it." He pauses, and the crease in his gaze lessens as he casts a fonder look at you. "Not that you ain't tryin' already. But you're still takin' up too much of the blame, and not realizing when you can be free. It doesn't have to be with me -- or anybody else, for that matter -- but try to live life a lil' more. Don't just dwell on the past and restrain yourself from stuff you want to achieve for yourself. You should live for you, just as you're tryna live for others."

He closes his eye sockets and brings a hand to his face, rubbing his forehead until he lets out a hushed sigh. Then, he opens them and straightens up on his seat, hands resting on his lap. There's a brief pause, broken when he breathes in again, saying, "...So a skeleton and a single parent walk into a bar," he takes another stop, continuing with, "One bares their skin to the bartender, earnest down to the bone," his breath hitches, yet he composes himself quickly, "the other sits back, looks into the past, and then wonders why he's feelin' so lonely."

He huffs and ends it all with a chuckle and an attempt at covering his face away from your sight. You stop him with the brush of a hand, taking his cheekbone when he turns to you. His body's shaking and a few tears escape his sockets, these he tries to wipe with his free hand, only for you to hold him back by doing that yourself. Caught in the moment, you kiss one of them away, the expectance of a salty taste proven wrong as you receive a hint of sweetness instead -- reflecting the memory of your day with him at the pâtisserie. His shoulders shake as he chokes back a sob, breaking down. His hands grab your back, bringing you in for a hug as he seeks more comfort. In that embrace, you can feel how his rib cage rises and falls at quick intervals, slowing down when you hug him back and wait until he breaks it apart.

The wait's as long as you expect it for someone in his state; the weight of his breaths diminish as he calms down and lets you go.

"Sorry about that," he comments, chuckling. "Wasn't really myself for a moment there, huh?"

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