#but im finally developed enough to actually just soak it in

[fl0ralsex]

i can’t believe in 3 weeks im going to get to just chill. for the first time in my life ever

[oh-for-fic-sake]

The Deal Pt 2

Masterlist

Summary: Clark take you to august to finish the deal.

Warnings: Adult Situations +18, Smut, Dub Con, BDSM, Toys

A/N: second part to @wolfieash​ ask which is here

Taglist: in reblog.

Smut below the cut.

"NO IM NOT GOING ! AND YOU CAN FUCK OFF!" You yelled chasing Clark into the living room arms cross and lips pulled into a snarl.

He rolled his eyes at you, you'd been throwing a fit all day.

"Sweetheart, you made a deal, gave him your word... you cant go back on it" he insisted once more trying to convince you.

"Yes I can it was my word! Not yours, I can do what I want!" You huffed blowing some hair out of your face it was hard trying to be serious when your hair seemed to want to stick in your mouth.

"No poppet I'm not letting you break you word , now get dressed we leave in a hour" he said quickly spinning you around pressing you to the bedroom door.

"Fuck you, I'm not going anywhere!" You grunted pulling away from him.

"Tonight love I promise, now go get ready august is expecting us..." he said grinning almost sweetly at you.

"I don't give a flying fuck! I'm not going" you stomped a foot at him finally making his brow twitch, jaw tightening in irritation.

He stood taller and let his frame seem to devour the space on the hall making you shrink, shivering as you watched your sweet fiancé become a great predator. A loin or bear?

"Sweetheart enough! Now go get dressed...I laid out your outfit" he ground out severely finally having enough. A deal was a deal... and he wanted your ass!

"Out fit? What outfit-OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?" You cried entering your room seeing the shear fabric

"That? Its a little body stocking~" Clark said leaning on the door frame arms crossed wearing a huge grin.

"IM NOT WEARING A FUCKING BODYSTOCKING!"

"Well I would if I were you because if not there will be images of your naked ass being flown about on the front pages tomorrow~" he quipped with a smirk.

"Yo-you wouldn't dare!" You said voice loosing its bite as he stared at you.

"Wouldn't I? I mean come on love anal's on the line~" he teased and moved up behind you and slapped your bottom hard enough to make you yip and jerk away.

"Now hop to it... You've got 50 minuets~" he called over his shoulder as he exited the room.

In the end Clarks threat of having you mooney metropolis was too much of a threat and you'd showered and slipped into the body stocking...

But you didn't shave! If they were gonna push through with your whole sex for silence deal then they would live with the consequences! No bare pussy for either of them!

Fuck'em.... or don't? Which was preferable

It wasn't that you didn't enjoy it, it was that you did... a little more then you should have! It frightened you the way you'd enjoyed being used and fought over.

"Oh come on why the long face angel?" August hummed as he opened the glass doors on his rooftop home, the penthouse was shiny sleek and as dark as the man himself.

"Fuck off august!" you grumbled walking right passed him as soon as Clark put you down

"Oh such a foul mouth! We will have to teach you some manners~" the agent quipped as you entered the bare but masculine space, everything was harsh lines and fucked up art pieces of splotching blocky shades of black, red and deep violet.

"Yes she's very snippy today... has been all week, pouting" Clark huffed shrugging. Taking the offered crystal glass with amber liquid.

"Ah we have a brat on our hands then?" August chuckled and walked through the home quickly snagging one of your elbows and directed you to the playroom, not wasting any time.

"Yeah, she doesn't want me to fuck her ass" Clark summarized with a shrug.

"Aww Why not sweety? You loved me fucking your ass? You cried and withered moaning so beautifully~" august hummed into your ear as he pressed you over the threshold into a large windowless room, strip lighting igniting the room in a light red. The devils den so to speak.

"Sh-shut up you prick" you snarled.

Augusts reply was a tsk and he pressed you over to a padded sawhorse and looked to Clark nodding to the ankle and wrist cuffs.

Clark breezed past him quickly securing you down making you curse him, but by this point it was a formality as you had already soaked yourself through.

"Oh would you look at that? Our little brat is eager~" august said with a chuckle and a warm hand probed you lightly making you jolt and try to squirm away.

"Yes I know, she likes denying herself, its strange she knows we will win but Continues to fight?" He said coming around your side ghosting his fingers over your ribs making you shudder.

"Well lets not waste time shall we? I have a few things out ready but first lets get this fitted shall we?" August said menacingly walking around you brandishing a very large O ring gag.

"After all if she's going to throw a tantrum I don't trust her not to bite" he uttered moving towards you.

"I've never thought of using one of those before... it wont hurt her will it?"

"Only her pride Clark trust me even she needs a... dressing down every once in a while" august reassured him.

Your eyes grew wide as the agent approached with the large gag that looked both threatening and enticing, things had been kinky with august but you hadn't ever gone this far into bdsm before. You were scared and still fighting but not as hard? You were curious and being dominated by them last week had... changed you. It had been thrilling to be so out of control.

"Should we... give her a signal or something? Incase it gets to much?" Clark quizzed, he was still all for it but wanted to be mindful of you. He didn't want to hurt you.

"Trust me she's going to love it, but in the case of something going wrong" august directed his attention to you befo4e continuing.

"There is a small desk bell one the inside of the left leg on the saw horse... if thing get too much hit it three times fast and we will get you down" he said seriously.

You frowned as his gaze bored into you, for a second you believed you saw actual concern in his eyes.

It unsettled you, August couldn't really have any feelings towards you could he? I mean this was blackmail!

You nodded quickly to him letting him know you understood.

Then just like that August was haughty again and quickly fixed the gag in your mouth, setting your teeth in the small grooves that was semi comfortable.

"Shes ready when you are~" the agent hummed and stood back.

Clark darted behind you and helped himself to you and august disappeared from sight.

You moaned into the room as your fiancé roamed your folds as if exploring them for the first time.

He was rougher then usual prodding and impaling you fast and hard before slowing and drawing your own arousal over your presented ass.

You withered as Clark used you body, pressing you higher and higher making you teeter on then edge then back away letting you calm down only to work you up again.

"I thought we could... try something... a little bonus for all of us tonight~" you heard august but couldn't see him.

"I'm listening" Clark said as he plunged his fingers back into you harder throwing off your concentration making you cry out.

"I have this" you tried seeing what August had but was too preoccupied with the maddening strokes of clark's fingers as he pounded away at your g-spot forcing you to try and rock on him chasing a high he had already cruely denied you twice.

"What even is that thing?" Cark said not paying attention to you as your body twisted and pulled trying to cum like a desperate whore.

"Here ill show you~" august said and Clarks fingers disappeared from you making you cry out and moan, your pussy tried holding him but it was to drenched to actually grip him.

Then something was pressed into you, large wide and very short.

"Oh-oh fuck?!AH!" You yelped  awkwardly around the gag as the toy settled, curved forward and down pressing on your gspot without being held. There was a large flat expanse resting outside of you to, the toy curved in a large C shape.

"Does that go up her?"

"No no, we just pop her little clit in here~ and press the button!" You jerked as august moved you, thick fingers prodding your clit and sat the engorged nub into a small round dip and pressed a button.

You squealed tensing all at once as you felt a suction on your clit and roared.

"Holy shit?" Clark said in awe watching as you keened and tried throwing you weight around on the toy that was held in place by your muscles clenching to it so tightly... It was bittersweet in a way, your own body holding the sweet torturous device on your clit.

"And it gets better, press that one" you hear a small click and arched moaning out as the egg like shape inside of you came to life vibrating against your insides.

Clark watched entranced as you withered this is what he'd been missing out on? Fuck!

August darted around you and strokes you hair watching as Clark stripped behind you unable to wait any longer as you thrashed about trying to rock into the toy.

"Shh shh thats a girl, now deep breath your wonderboy may be a little too enthusiastic if your doing all that squirming~"

You froze feeling Clark poise himself at your well lubed ass then grunted as he thrust forward splitting you open.

Clark hissed and moaned loudly as the vibrating egg not only made you quiver and tense around him already threatening to flood the place but it also rubbed his cock as he rutted you.

"Oh fuck- thats amazing! I cant- I shit babe!?" Clark didn't wait he immediately began pounding in to the tight quivering body before him.

August chuckled once more before releasing his own belt buckle. Not wanting to let your wails and monas go to waste.

They would work wonders on his cock, offering the sweetest of releases as you screamed onto his cock as he lodged it into your throat.

August was never into men, but he could develop a thing for corrupting this huge perfect man.

For now August would let you and Clark think you were in control of the deal. Let this one final night play out.

But the seed was sewn and before long he knew Superman would return wanting to explore more and more of this little sex dungeon. And then he will strike another deal.

Because August wasn't opposed to making a little compromise to get decent pussy. If he had to share with Supes so be it, it looked like he could teach the kid a thing or two and he would gladly, because he had many more toys to tease you both with~

If things went to plan he'd have not one but two desperate little subs. And he couldn't wait!

[atlabeth]

talking to the moon

summary: dealing with the aftermath of the worst event of your life. 

pairing: sokka x fem!reader but solely platonic. stan big brother sokka 

a/n: this became so much longer than i initially meant for lmao. it was just supposed to be sokka and y/n talking but then i. wrote the whole death scene and a whole backstory and. im sorry. i made myself sad while writing this 

wc: 4.1k 

warnings: so much angst, death, mentions of suffocation, mentions of arranged marriages, one mention of blood, one single curse i think, lots of anger and lots of sadness but some fluff at the end 

based on the song “talking to the moon” by bruno mars 

living in the northern water tribe wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. 

as a waterbender, it should’ve been a perfect haven. a renowned master to teach her how to fight and become a master herself, a constant feeling of power being around ice and water all the time, and a comfortable life as the daughter of two important councilmembers that worked alongside chief arnook. 

but the only thing y/n had come to know of this place was a complete and utter loss of freedom. 

she wasn’t allowed to learn martial waterbending simply because she was a woman. master pakku wouldn’t even give her the time of day, and when she complained to her parents they cited century-long traditions and told her that was just how things were. 

y/n felt comfortable being around water and ice all the time, but it’s not like the power of the moon helped her when she hardly knew anything in the first place. it was slightly easier to try and teach herself new techniques that she learned from watching master pakku and his students, but it still almost always ended in failure. 

and of course, her noble heritage simply meant that she would be married off once she reached the appropriate age for the benefit of her family. yippee. 

but there was one benefit that came along with being the daughter of nobles that worked closely with the chief. 

princess yue. 

she was without a doubt the nicest girl that y/n had ever known, and they quickly became each other’s closest friends. y/n thought that maybe she wouldn’t like her because yue was two years her senior, but it didn’t matter in her eyes. yue showed y/n a side that she never showed anyone else; the carefree, energetic, loving side. the side that told y/n fantastical stories while they rode together the waterways. the side that encouraged y/n to waterbend whenever she could and to try as hard as possible to get the martial techniques down because ‘i know you can do it!’ the side that was absolutely fascinated by her waterbending, the side that shrieked in surprise then dissolved into giggles every time y/n soaked her at the end of the session. 

yue was the bright light in y/n’s boring days, and y/n was a needed reprieve from yue’s duties.

the young girls didn’t know that there was so much coming for them. 

~~

team avatar visiting y/n’s home was one of the most exciting things to happen to her. it was like a breath of fresh air in the monotony of her life, and it didn’t take too long for y/n to become friends with all of them at the celebratory dinner the night they arrived. 

y/n and katara instantly struck off. as waterbenders of the same age they already had a connection, but it was only strengthened the longer they stayed. y/n had never cheered so loud when she fought against pakku. 

it was impossible not to like aang. he was even younger than y/n with an infectious positive attitude and a smile always on his face. he even offered to help teach her waterbending along with katara after learning from pakku, which was a great plan until it wasn’t. 

her association with sokka came from her association with yue. he was infatuated with the princess almost immediately — it wasn’t a surprise, y/n was sure every boy in the tribe had a crush on her in some form — but he was also very kind to y/n. as time went on, they developed more of a sibling-like bond and y/n loved it. she was an only child raised to the highest expectations, but she was allowed to let loose around sokka. it also helped to see him make a fool in front of himself every time her and yue were together. 

things were looking up for y/n. she had three new friends that all liked her best friend, and she was actually learning a little bit more about fighting with waterbending from katara. everything was perfect. 

until the fire nation attacked. 

y/n had been with yue and sokka when they saw the black snow and immediately rushed back to the tribe to warn everyone. that was how a fourteen year old noble girl who barely knew how to defend herself like y/n got involved in a fight against the fire nation. 

after rescuing aang from zuko and, at aang’s request, bringing the unconscious prince with them, they started traveling back to the spirit oasis. y/n sat in the back of the saddle with sokka and yue, a new friend and her oldest friend, when yue suddenly grabbed her head with a small groan. y/n looked around and the world around them had turned red as blood. something was very wrong.

“are you okay? sokka asked, reaching for her instinctively as if to protect her from whatever was hurting her. 

“i.. i feel faint,” she muttered.

“i feel it too,” aang added. “the moon spirit is in trouble.” 

y/n’s eyes widened as she stared back at yue, horror dancing in her eyes as she shook her head. “no, no it can’t be. yue, you know what that means—” 

it wasn’t hard to catch onto the fearful tone in her voice and katara set an amicable hand on her shoulder. “what are you talking about, y/n?” 

thankfully, yue took over. “i owe the moon spirit my life.” 

“what do you mean?” sokka’s eyes went between y/n and yue, y/n’s worried gaze trained on yue as she explained how the moon spirit had given her life as a baby. when she was done, the water tribe siblings were staring at her in disbelief. 

“if the moon spirit is in danger then we need to save it.” y/n’s voice was hardened as they got closer to the spirit oasis, stretching her fingers out to get the blood flowing again in case she needed to bend. she didn’t know very much about combat besides what katara had taught her, but hopefully it would be enough to at least aid the rest of the team. 

appa slid to a stop in the spirit oasis and aang, sokka, katara, and y/n all hopped off of his back and got into battle stances. sokka took out his boomerang, aang wielded his staff, and y/n and katara got ready to bend. 

“don’t bother,” zhao spat. he held up the bag with tui and positioned his fist next to it, posing the very obvious threat. y/n’s eyes widened and her hands fell the slightest bit. he wouldn’t. 

it turned out that he very well would. 

y/n thought that they would be safe, that yue would be safe once he released the fish after iroh’s threat, but she should’ve known a man like that would never be satisfied. just as the normal hues of the oasis had returned, zhao let out a yell and blasted the koi with fire, plunging the world into various shades of grey. 

y/n let out a strangled cry as she realized what it meant, and she wanted to unleash all of her fury on zhao. she wanted to make him hurt, make him understand just what he had done. but it seemed that general iroh already had that plan as he started firebending viciously, swiftly defeating the soldiers after zhao had gotten away. 

y/n felt like she was in a haze, following through with her movements but not actually there. the four of them rushed towards the water and yue soon joined them, all looking down at tui in horror. the moon spirit was gone, dead, killed. 

her worst fear had come true, and she stared at yue’s blue eyes, the only thing that still had color, mouth opening and closing as she tried to think of things to say. 

“there’s no hope now,” yue mourned. “it’s over now.” 

“no it’s not.” 

y/n watched in amazement as aang merged with the ocean spirit and left to defend her home, but it melted away once again when she joined the siblings, iroh, and yue at the front of the water.

“it’s too late. it’s dead.” katara stared at the dead fish when iroh placed it back into the water. it truly did seem like it was over. y/n felt none of the usual power she felt at night. if she tried to bend, she knew nothing would happen.

iroh seemed to notice yue as she stepped closer and he raised his eyebrows. “you have been touched by the moon spirit. some of its life is in you.” 

“yes, you’re right.” yue set her jaw and y/n immediately knew what she was thinking. “it gave me life. maybe i can give it back.” 

“no!” y/n and sokka cried at the same time. y/n’s voice cracked and she had to do everything she could to prevent the tears from falling. “yue, no. you don’t have to do this.” 

“it’s my duty, y/n.” her kind blue eyes, an image that would haunt y/n for years to come, glistened with unshed tears as she walked over to the oasis. this time sokka grabbed her hand to try and stop her. 

“i won’t let you! your father told me to protect you!” sokka usually guarded his emotions but this time the fear in his voice was obvious, and it hurt. he didn’t want to lose her. he couldn’t lose her. 

“i have to do this.” 

y/n wanted to scream at yue to stop, try and knock some sense into her, hold the girl that she loved back from sacrificing herself. but she just stood there, frozen, as yue hovered her hands over the dead fish. tui began to glow, and yue collapsed. 

y/n rushed over to her as sokka caught her and she fell to her knees. the tears were falling, she didn’t care, her friend was gone, she was dying. y/n felt yue’s ice cold hand on her arm and she grasped it with both of her own. her and sokka were barely holding it together as they watched the girl they both loved die in their arms. 

“y/n..” her voice was already faint, she was using up all of her strength just to talk to them in her final moments. “thank you for everything. never forget what you are fighting for. i will always cherish our friendship.” 

a choked sob escaped y/n’s lips and she gripped yue’s hand as tightly as she could, like maybe if she didn’t let go then she would come back. she couldn’t even hear what she said to sokka, all she could hear was the pounding in her head. this couldn’t be happening. 

and then she was gone. the ice cold hand in y/n’s grip was gone, the girl they were cradling was gone, and in her place was just emptiness. iroh placed the koi fish back into the water and the entire oasis filled with light, and the energy around the lake turned into yue. she was ethereal. she was a spirit. she was gone. 

yue came closer and wrapped y/n in a hug, feeling more like a gentle breeze than a real person hugging her. she then kissed sokka, and a faint smile graced her lips. “goodbye, i love you both. i will always be with you.”

and with that, she was gone. 

y/n couldn’t hold it in anymore. she started sobbing, tears wracking her body and making it hard to breathe. she wrapped her arms as tightly as she could around sokka, burying her head in the space between his shoulder and his neck, and he returned the hug. they were just two kids who had watched a girl they loved sacrifice herself. what else could they do but hold each other and hope to all the spirits that they would be okay?

~~

y/n left with aang, katara, and sokka when they decided to set course for omashu. she couldn’t stay at the northern water tribe. all it served as was a constant reminder of that fateful night, the night that she had lost her best friend. she saw yue in everything, and she knew she would lose her mind if she stayed. so she asked if she could join them on their journey, and they agreed. y/n felt a constant pit of emptiness and hoped that helping the avatar would absolve some of the guilt. 

it didn’t. 

“this is your fault, y/n.” 

the blue eyes that haunted y/n so often appeared once again, staring back at her unflinchingly. there was a certain hardness behind them, a coldness that pervaded her skin, making its way to her heart. but she couldn’t look away. 

“you should’ve been able to save me.” yue’s voice, normally soft spoken and kind, reverberated throughout the endless void y/n was trapped in. 

she looked beautiful, otherworldly. the fabric of her dress floated around her at the edges and her white hair, the ever present reminder of her connection to the moon, flowed down her back. yue appeared the same as she had when she sacrificed herself, and it was the way she would look forever. y/n’s heart ached for her friend, knowing that she would never live out the rest of her life, never get to be the ruler she was meant to be. 

she tried to talk, but her voice wouldn’t work. her throat felt like it was closing up slowly, and her limbs might as well have been cast in concrete with how heavy they all felt. yue’s icy glare disappeared from view, but her voice was still all around her. 

“you did this to me. you’re the reason i’m dead. you should’ve been able to save me.” 

the words repeated thousands of times on top of each other, becoming louder and louder that it was all she could focus on. y/n was suffocating underneath it all, she couldn’t take it. she wanted to sob out how sorry she was, tell yue that her biggest regret was not being able to save her, reach out and bring her into her world again. spirits, she wanted her best friend back so badly. 

“YOU SHOULD’VE BEEN ABLE TO SAVE ME.” the words echoed through her skull so loudly that she felt like it was going to crack from sheer force. 

y/n eyes suddenly flew open and she lurched upwards, breathing heavily, a scream on the edge of her lips that she was barely able to bite back. she clamped her hands over her mouth until she could be sure it wouldn’t come loose, and it took even longer for her breathing to get back to normal.

it didn’t look like she had disturbed the sleep of the others, but she couldn’t stay here. she got out of her sleeping bag and rushed out of their camp, making sure she stayed light on her feet so that the others could continue to rest. momo perked up as she ran past him, and y/n shook her head and raised a finger to her lips. he seemed to get the hint and went back to sleep, and with a strained smile y/n continued out. 

it was at that moment that a certain water tribe boy groggily sat up, able to catch the end of a tunic dress disappearing into the woods after he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. he thought it was katara at first but a quick glance to his side proved that his sister was still asleep. it was y/n’s spot that was empty. he immediately knew why she was gone, and he got up to follow her; there was no way he was going to leave her alone right now. sokka didn’t exactly want to be alone either.  

‘you should’ve been able to save me.’ they were words that never left y/n’s mind; at this point it was a part of her conscience. the princess had never actually said the words, her last moments had been spent reassuring y/n and sokka before she faded away, but it didn’t matter. she was constantly wracked by guilt, and though sokka did a good job at hiding it, she knew he felt the same way. she wondered if he was plagued by the same nightmares she had. it was no surprise it happened tonight of all nights — today marked one month since yue died. 

no. since yue had been killed. 

she might’ve given her life for the moon spirit willingly, but y/n blamed zhao, that fire nation admiral, for her death. he was the one that killed the moon spirit, so he was the one that had killed her best friend. she had never felt as much rage as she had in the moment that he blasted tui with fire. 

she hoped he was dead. 

y/n got to the edge of the woods and stared at the night sky, the slight breeze and the ambiance around her doing little to ease her mind. she sighed and leaned back against a tree, staring at the sky in hopes it would give her some kind of answer. but all it did was make her feel even worse.

i know you’re somewhere out there somewhere far away

yue was there. the moon was there, but yue was the moon so she was there. it felt like a cruel joke, having her so close but so far away. always within her sight but never in her reach. she longed for the days when she was able to pull the princess away from her duties to engage in a snowball fight with her friends or when yue asked her to show off her waterbending with the childlike wonder she never got to show or when things were normal and her friend wasn’t the fucking moon. 

i want you back, i want you back 

y/n felt the familiar stings of tears behind her eyes and she slowly slid against the tree until she was sitting on the ground. she bit the inside of her cheek so hard she drew blood in an effort to stop the tears, but it didn’t matter, they fell anyways. 

the empty feeling she constantly carried with her got better over time, but tonight it was just coming back with full force. she was reminded of everything that she had lost and it hurt. spirits, it hurt so much. 

my neighbors think i’m crazy  but they don’t understand you’re all i have, you’re all i have 

she pressed the heel of her hand against her forehead and squeezed her eyes shut, trying to block out her feelings, when she heard some branches snap. she opened her eyes and looked up, the corner of her lips quirking up when she saw who it was. 

“hi.” her voice was faint, barely noticeable, but it was all she managed to muster.

“hi.” sokka’s eyes were sympathetic as walked over to her, silently questioning if she was okay with his presence. she nodded and scooted over to make room, and sokka slid down against the tree next to her. 

they sat in comfortable silence for a while, feeling solace in the other simply being there. y/n’s eyes stayed glued to the sky, y/e/c irises reflecting the light of the stars. now that her sobbing was done, she just felt tired. traveling with the avatar was physically demanding with all the fighting and running they did, but this was mental. 

she was tired of feeling worthless. tired of feeling guilty, of feeling angry, hurt, heartbroken, regretful, helpless, weak. 

tui and la, she was so damn tired. 

at night, when the stars light up my room i sit by myself talking to the moon trying to get to you 

y/n tore her eyes away from the sky and looked at sokka. he felt the slight movement and made eye contact as well. y/n couldn’t help but think how similar his eyes were to yue’s. 

“do you talk to her too?” the question came suddenly from y/n before she even knew it, and her voice was just as soft as before. “to the moon, i mean.”

sokka’s gaze turned wistful as he watched the moon and nodded. “all the time. even if i’m just talking to myself in my head, it feels like i’m talking to her as long as the moon is out. sometimes it helps. it makes me feel like she’s still here, or like she’s watching over me. other times..”

“it makes you feel worse,” y/n finished. he nodded again and she sighed heavily. “sometimes i hate it. just looking at the moon makes me want to scream or cry or yell until i can’t anymore, because i hate it for taking her away from me. and i know she had to do it, but the irrational part of me is angry at her for leaving. and then i feel guilty for caring about myself more than her when she’s the one that’s gone, and i just—” 

her voice caught in her throat and the tears started to fall once more. it felt like she couldn’t even think about yue without crying and it made her feel even more weak than before. 

in hopes you’re on the other side talking to me too 

it hurt sokka’s heart to see her like this. yue’s death had affected both of them, spirits, it had left a hole in his heart that he was still trying to mend, but as time went on he had gotten better. but y/n had known yue for years, they had such a close bond that when sokka wanted to know advice on how to get yue to like him he came to her. and now her closest friend was gone and she had left her home and her family behind to help them on their journey.. he couldn’t imagine how she felt. but he wasn’t going to let her go through this alone. 

sokka wrapped his arm around her and though she flinched at first, y/n immediately relaxed when she realized what he was doing. he was trying to comfort her by just being there, and she appreciated it immensely. y/n leaned her head against his shoulder and the two of them sat there in silence once again, watching the sky.

or am i a fool who sits alone talking to the moon 

“you don’t have to feel guilty,” sokka murmured. “she doesn’t blame you for what happened and she doesn’t blame you for how you feel. i know that she’s watching over us right now.”

“you think?” he nodded and the smallest smile graced her lips. “she doesn’t blame you either. every time you hung out together she would come running back to me telling me how much fun she had and how she already felt so close to you, and how much you brightened up her days. she truly loved you, sokka.” 

sokka laughed humorlessly and shook his head. “i loved her too. i didn’t think it was possible to fall for someone so quickly, but she proved me wrong.”

“she was good at that. proving people wrong.” 

do you ever hear me calling? 

more silence passed. 

y/n opened her mouth and closed it again, trying to find the words.

“yue?” she started off timid, but her words gained more confidence as she went on. “i.. i don’t know if you can hear us. but if you can, i just want to let you know that i- that we miss you. not a day goes by where i don’t think of you, and i hope that you are watching down on us. because we love you. and we always will.” 

“thank you for everything you’ve done.” sokka spoke up now. “i hope you’re at peace, yue, wherever you are.”

cause every night i’m talking to the moon  still trying to get to you

y/n swore that the moon glowed a little brighter in the night sky when they finished. 

she didn’t know how time passed so quickly, but her and sokka ended up falling asleep out there, his arm around her and her head on his shoulder.

and for the first time since the siege of the north, y/n slept without nightmares. 

[nomazee]

Komorebi (6)

komorebi, final.

synopsis: Tsukishima dislikes the amount of parallels there are with you and Hinata. He dislikes the way you’re so energetic and exuberant when you want to be, and the way you can get along so well with people. He dislikes the way that people are naturally drawn to you, and the way you’re so willing to put time into your dumb gifts and snacks and treats for a team of boys you barely know. But Tsukishima does not dislike you. And he supposes that’s part of the problem.

series content: developing relationship, (sort of) ooc tsukishima, strangers to (sort of) friends to lovers, angst, fluff, slow burn

part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six

(the final part!! i don’t wanna ramble too much for right now so all of my final thoughts will be at the end! 

love yall :) )

☾.:°∗★.:☆:.★∗°:.☽ 

Just like that, Tsukishima is back to square one. 

The world goes silent for a few days. He hates to admit that he’s losing sleep over you, but at this point he’s too far gone to care what anyone thinks about him. Except for you--and while he knows that assuming things is bad, he can only conclude by the way you looked so scared of him before, that you do not think he’s a good person. 

(The gifts you gave him nearly contradict that assumption. But he ignores those for the most part. The scarf you gave him a while ago rests on a chair in his room and more often than not he finds himself staring at it during the deep hours of the night. He hasn’t worn it yet.)

Yamaguchi keeps giving him glances during class--not that that’s any different from before, but it irks him more now that he’s actually seen you. The blonde wonders if his friend knew about you, knew that you were going to drop something off in that moment and just never thought to warn him. Maybe you two were plotting that together, like an odd sort of revenge tactic. 

He doesn’t know. He doesn’t know a lot of things. What he does know is that he’s tired, and he misses you, and he wants to be warm again. 

The morning is cold when we wakes up. He wasn’t really sleeping--it was one of those nights of a daze of exhaustion where he kept blinking himself awake. At five-thirty AM, he sighs, staring at the blank, matte wall of his ceiling. Tsukishima wills himself to crawl out of his bed and get ready for school. It’s still dark outside, the flames of daylight creeping up on the horizon while he steps around his room. 

He’s ready to leave by six. His mother is awake, sitting in the kitchen sipping hot tea and scrolling through her cellphone. She catches a glimpse of her son walking through the front door--Tsukishima feels her pensive gaze on him but refuses to say anything, just like always. 

The air is cold. Despite the long-sleeved uniform he’s wearing, Tsukishima feels ill-prepared to face the day, in more than one way. Nevertheless, he lets go of his reluctance at the door and trudges onward in the frigid air, nose flushed with red and cheeks going numb in a matter of seconds. 

(The scarf is in his bag now rather than his desk chair, hidden beneath his books and folders and pencils. He wants to wear it, knows he should, but his guilty conscious tells him to leave it unworn for now.) 

The walk passes by quickly, far too quickly for his comfort. Before Tsukishima knows it, he’s faced with the front doors of the very school he dreads to enter. 

His fingers tingle with numbness as he pulls at the metal handles of the door. The school is quiet, empty for the most part. The faint shuffle of teachers in their classrooms echoes throughout the halls as his feet lead him to Class 1-4. 

There’s a faint pitter-patter of footsteps from inside the classroom. Tsukishima passes it off as one of his teachers, again, but the sight he’s met with when he walks through the doorway gives him a disturbing sense of deja vu. 

You’re there, at his desk--the same bracelet from a few days ago resting on top of a box that  you seem to have just placed on his desk. You blink up at him owlishly. He can only return the gesture, dumbstruck as he is. 

It’s too reminiscent of the events from a few days ago. Once again, his eyes are prickling with stinging pain and his throat dries up. 

He doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t know what to do.

What does he know, he wonders. He knows he hates crying. It’s unfortunate that that’s the only thing he seems capable of doing. 

It’s all overwhelming for him. The cold of the outside lingering on his skin, the sheets of sunlight pouring through the window as the sun rises, your eyes, your sheer presence in front of him. It piles on his shoulder and soon he feels liquid heat pouring down his cheeks. 

Tsukishima Kei is crying. In front of you, in a classroom, watching you grip the box in your hands and stare at him, unmoving. 

His throat hurts. He tries to choke down any audible sobs, but loud, ugly sniffles echo throughout the room. He wants to fall through the floor, squeezes his eyes shut so he doesn’t have to look at you. He can’t bear to know that you find him pathetic, even more so than he already seemed in the last few weeks. 

Distantly, he recognizes the sound of footsteps coming closer to him but tunes them out in hopes that he’s just imagining them. A hand finds its way to his shoulder--it’s warm, and he flinches. He knows it’s yours, knows by the heat of it and the comfort he feels from a simple touch. It’s the first time he’s felt your touch, but he feels so light now--so warm and comfortable and cloudy. 

“Kei.” It’s your voice. It swims through the air and into his ears, sobs only increasing in severity at the sound of his first name on your lips. Your other hand comes to rest on his cheek, both sets of fingers gently brushing away the pouring stream. 

Fond. Tsukishima Kei is very fond of the feeling of your skin on his. He hopes he can become well-acquainted with it, if he tries hard enough. 

“Kei, it’s okay.” You’re so soft, voice low and lacking any hostility he expected you to have. Your thumbs pat at his under eyes, soaking up the wetness that pools. 

“Can you look at me?” He’s stubborn, hand coming up to grip your wrist and lips clamped tightly shut to reduce the shiver of his entire body as he weeps. A gentle shake of his head makes you sigh--he knows the way he’s acting is so uncharacteristic but he can’t help it. Not with the feel of your hands on his face, your voice, the sound of his first name spoken by you still ringing in his ears. 

“It’s okay. It’s alright. I’m here.” 

You are here. It seems impossible to him, but you’re here. With him. With your hands giving him warmth and comfort and fondness. Everything he ever wanted. 

His eyes blink open. Tsukishima Kei looks at you--really looks. Your lips are upturned, gentle as is the rest of you. The sun is halfway above the horizon now, the light from it filtering through the leaves of the trees that are planted outside the window. The golden rays hit your eyes perfectly, changing the hue the slightest bit and making him stop his tears momentarily--just to admire you. 

You blink at him. You smile. Tsukishima Kei is in love, just a little bit.

☾.:°∗★.:☆:.★∗°:.☽

(so... this has been a wild ride. 

first off i wanna say thank you for all the support i’ve received throughout this whole thing! it really means so much to me. i love you all so much. 

im very proud of myself for finishing this. this is by no means the greatest product i could’ve created--it was a little bit messy, and the word count of the entire series (ab 6000 i think) is lower than some long oneshots i’ve seen.

there’s a lot of things i could’ve done better--no doubt about that. but i am very proud of myself for making this. for finishing a WHOLE multipart series,,,,yes it was short but......its here! i did it! i’m finished! very happy with this. 

this series was mainly set in tsukishima’s own head--and i know it was probably at least a little disappointing that it was NOT action-based---and the fact that it was tsukki-centric was definitely a downer to some people because you didnt really get to feel what.... YOU would feel in that situation. we didnt get to see that here. 

and its okay if that’s what you disliked most!!! in truth i think that was one of my biggest weaknesses writing this series. but i liked it this way, i think. i like trying to analyze characters within my writing and i think that, at the very least, this was a good challenge for me to try to take on with characterization and the like.

anyways....that’s it i think! thank you so much for supporting me, really. i’m very thankful for everyone whose liked or reblogged any of the parts to komorebi. you are all incredible i love you. <3) 

(pssst!!! i’ll be talking about my 200 follower event soon. if you wanna participate, be on the lookout for that!!)

[onepiece-writting-forest]

Hello my dear friend! I really loved your headcanons with Killer and Hawkins walking in on their crush, and i wanted to ask if we can have a part 2, where this time it's their crush who are walking in ~ SFW or NSFW i let you choose 🤗 (im pretty you were surprised by my request 👀👀)

[Part 1!] [Headcanon of Killer and Hawkins walking ino n their crush changing]

[Totally did not expect this ask...no... 👀 So Since I already like the setup, I will recycle that one. Especially the forest part with Killer, and i continued with Hawkins part. And I  made it SFW since it’s two characters and I didn’t want it to be too long ;°;  My apologies. Hope you enjoy!]

Your captain had given you the task to go collect something edible. May it be mushrooms, berries or any other obscure plant which wouldn’t poison the pirates. You were the ships medic, and you had the knowledge for it. Especially after you prepared yourself before your crew anchored at this nature-dominated island. You have found some fitting literature for this specific island which had given you the information on what to eat, and what to stay away from. 

While you walked in the humid atmosphere, you got thirsty at some point and followed the sound of the river. Your steps were light and quiet as usual. When you arrived, you felt a too familiar presents close by, and tensed up. You looked around, only to spot a wild blond mane. Staying hidden behind a tree trunk you watched him. He was closing the buttons on his jeans. His shirt, his mask and his weapons were laying in the grass. It seemed like he took a quick bath, his hair seemed damp from the water. Understandable considering how many days you’ve been on this island now. All the walking through mud and bushes didn’t do well on the crew hygiene. His bare back was turned to you, and you kept watching him from the distance. He didn’t move, just stood there. You noticed how his back muscles tensed up. His behavior was off.

Within seconds, Killer had one of his scythe in his hand, turned around and threw it into your direction. The speed the blade was spinning at you made your heart stop. Without even thinking you pulled your sword out, enough for the blade to keep the tip in the sword sheath, and blocked his scythe. It crashed against your blade, and made you stumble backwards for a bit. “You should know better to not stalk people when they’re changing.” Without his mask and his shirt, he walked over to you, his voice somewhat amusing. You needed a second to catch your breath, before you pushed your sword back in. Sneaking up on Killer wasn’t smart. “Throwing your  scythe wasn’t necessary.” You said with a sigh and stroke your hair back,  before you faced him. Seeing him without his mask wasn’t new to you. He was quite comfortable around you, and you were well aware of that. Yet, the way the sun hit against him and contoured his edges wasn’t something you were used to. He caught you starring, again.

Killer snipped in front of your face, trying to get you back to reality. You blinked a few times in irritation, before you pulled your eyes away from his torso and faced him.“I knew it was you. Wanted to test you.” He grinned slightly, and picked up his scythe to put it back into it’s sheath. He knew your skills, you wouldn’t be a member of this crew if you wouldn’t be strong. “Hope you enjoyed it.”  He tilted his head, self-confidence beaming from him. He knew how you felt for him, that’s what made him so cocky. Situations like this weren’t rare, the two of you flirted a lot when the others were not around. Throwing suggestive comments at each other whenever you could. You knew it was mutual, yet still hidden. “Of course, thanks for the show.” You said and grinned up to him. He clicked his tongue and bowed down to you, capturing your chin between his fingers. The way his broad form hovered over you made goosebumps spread over you skin. You didn’t back down, and leaned into his touch, a grin still hovering on your lips. “It’s not for free...” His voice was deep and raspy, almost a whisper.

This cat-and-mouse game was going on for a while now, and there were many opportunities you could have taken. Like this one. No one was around, no one would hear you two. However, you didn’t want this to be some friendship with benefits. You’ve seen this with many women on man-dominated crews. It seemed enjoyable, but you wanted something more. Your crush had developed into a love interest, and you were not a toy Killer would play with however he wanted.

Before he could react, you had your dagger pulled, pressed against his throat. It was in no way threatening, Killer was aware of that. It was rather playful, just like him throwing the his scythe. A smirk formed on his lips and he raised an eyebrow. You pressed the blade slightly against his skin, just to let him feel the cold blade. “Ask me out, and I will repay you.” Killers shoulders shook from the chuckle he held back. He loved that on you. You played along with all those dirty jokes and suggestive looks, however weren’t easy to get. A women with dignity and self-confidence. Just his taste.

“Alright.” He pulled away, and walked back to were his shirt and mask was. You put your dagger back and watched him gather his stuff with a smirk. “If we survive this shithole island, I will take you out. Deal?”

“Deal.”

You were really thankful that you were allowed to use his bathtub. It calmed your mind and relaxed your body more than ever. Not only taking a bath, but generally the atmosphere in his bathroom was so cozy. He had a good sense for decorating the room, and those essential oils for the water were amazing. He knew how to relax, that was clear. 

The last time he allowed it to you, without you asking. It was an offer you gladly took. This time, you wanted to ask him for a second allowance. The relationship between you and your captain seemed pretty down to earth from an outta perspective, yet you two get along really well. So well, that he indeed allowed you a second time. The crew had noticed that you sometimes got a different treatment from the captain, and they didn’t begrudged it. They actually liked seeing you two together and only waited for the moment when it would finally happen. Your personalities fitted perfectly for each other, which you had noticed as well. But for now, you thanked your captain for being able to use the bathtub again. You agreed on the evening, since the crew had business to take care of the whole day. 

That business ended in a bloodbath, a glory victory for you crew. Some small injuries but nothing to be worried about. Your clothes were soaked in blood which slowly beg an to dry and smell of iron. Dirt and blood from your enemies covered your hands and some drops even landed on your face. You felt disgusting and the only thing you wanted was that promised bath. A quick visit to your own room to grab your stuff, before you headed to the captains cabin. You knocked, yet no one answered. Thinking Hawkins wasn’t there, you opened up the room and peaked inside. It was empty. You closed the door behind you and were about to step into the bathroom, when you spotted that the door was open. You froze in place when you saw your captain sitting on the edge of the bathtub. He had his shirt removed, and tried to scrub the blood stains away. A red splash of it was on his face and on his torso. He looked like he came freshly from combat, which he actually did.

He didn’t look up, yet spoke to you which made you flinch just a bit. It felt like he didn’t notice you, yet he was well aware that you were in his room. He didn’t forgot the promise he made. “My apologies, I will leave in a minute.” You nodded and stepped into the room, to place your fresh clothes in your hand on a stool close by. He was still scrubbing his shirt, but at some point gave it up. He tried to remove the fresh blood as good as possible, so the later washing would do the rest. Looking up, he faced you, and watched how you placed your neatly folded clothes aside. His eyes then darted to the bathtub. He’d love to take a bath right now, he felt as dirty as you did. You caught him looking, aware of what he was thinking. A silent sigh left your lips as you sat next to him on the edge of the bathtub. “Hawkins...I think the thing between us is pretty obvious now isn't it?” He looked at you for a moment and nodded. He thought the same. “I guessed you would want to speak about it today. It was time anyway. Waiting longer wouldn’t do any good.”

There was a short silence between you two, both trying to think of words to say. The right words. You mind was circling over so many thoughts and questions you had, you couldn't decided which one was the right one. “...Should we?” You finally broke the silence and looked at the blonde one. This questions was probably one he could answer better than you. Not only with him reading cards, but also him having a good gut feeling for decisions. That was the reason he was the captain after all. He knew when the risk was worth it, and when not.  Hawkins looked into his lap and tilted his head. He was thinking about it. He had thought about it for a long time actually. And the answer was yes every time, the chance of a successful relationship with you only grew by time. However, he didn’t want to answer with a simple yes.

Actually, he didn’t answer you at all, and simply stood up. He turned around to close the plughole of the bathtub, before he turned on the water. You watched him curiously, knowing you captain would give you an answer eventually, which didn’t have to be verbal.  He took a few of the essential oils, looked at them and tried to decide which one to pick. A floral one got chosen. He let a few drops fall into the water and put the glass bottle back into the basket. The candles in the room got lit, and the bullseye covered with the curtains. When he closed the door of the bathroom and stayed with you, you knew you got your answer. It was a clear ‘yes’. A small smile formed on your lips and your heart raced liked wild. Even more when he began to strip down completely and sat into the tub. He looked at you, nodding into the water. You of course understood his silent demand, and removed your blood soaked clothes. Hawkins held a hand out for you and helped you get into the tub. You  made yourself comfortable between his legs with your back resting against his chest.

His arms wrapped around your form, and he leaned his head back, closing his eyes. “Well, since it’s official, how about we share my room as well. How does that sound?”

[kisipie]

Just Sorry?: A Mini Series (Chapter 13/??)

Author’s Note: After an extremely long hiatus I’ve finally updated this series. Thank you to everyone who has kept an interest in this story. It really means a lot to me. Enjoy the read~ Warnings: Following chapters will contain violence, mentions of drugs usage, sexual situations, daddy kink, rough sex and angst. Previous Chapter: 12 “I really can’t believe Jaebum let me go to my fucking store opening all by myself! I looked hot as hell in my outfit too... “ Sumin sighed while pouring out her frustrations to her female housemates. All of the Seven Girls were seated at the dining room table as they enjoyed a large pizza pie for lunch. With the men working even on a Saturday afternoon, it gave the young women time alone to discuss everything that’s been going on in the mansion. Well...everything that they chose to disclose. 

“Oh shut up Sumin. Wasn’t that like two week ago? Since then you two must’ve had sex at least 5 times.” Hana rolled her eyes as a soft chuckle was heard from Natalie. All the girls knew what had occurred between the CEO and the fashionista but they also knew that as soon as the two fought they’d be in one another’s bed within three days. 

You couldn’t help to let out a little smile at Sumin for her crush toward Jaebum. The two were like fire and gasoline. Everything was hot and heavy when it came to their bedroom activities but communication wise; that was a tornado riding in on the peak of a tsunami. A total fucking disater. Thoughts shifting to the same night of their argument, the words Jaebum had shared with you has been on your mind ever since. 

One date with Jaebum wouldn’t be so bad. In fact you were actually excited to finally be able to get to know even more about him. He was always focusing on work and satisfying his desires when needed, the other rarely allowed anyone in the house to know what was going on with him mentally. The only person you could think of being the brunettes confidant would be Jackson. And whatever was discussed between the two always stayed with them, But you wanted to be another friend in the house that Jaebum could confide in. When he calmed your anger towards Natalie and the blonde a few weeks ago you wanted to be able to do the same for him if needed. So why not take JB’s proposal. 

Your only concern was that if Sumin found out about the date, would things change between the two of you or would she only just see it as you and Jaebum sticking to the contract and building a friendship like they have. 

____

“Whatever, he's still an dick.” Sumin hissed as her fingers brushed against each other to dust off any remaining pizza crumbs that may have been lingering. Why did the brunette have to be so cold to her at the times she needed him the most. Of course she knew of their arrangement but the young woman had assumed that over the years the two would have developed a bond strong enough for Jaebum to take some time off of work to tend to her. Or maybe she was wrong for wishful thinking. 

“Listen if you really feel upset about it. I say talk to him but we know how Jae can get so don’t be surprised if you don't get the response you want.” Natalie warned her friend before finishing up her cheesy slice as well. Once everyone had satisfied their hunger each one went off to their room except for you. Making your way towards Jinyoung’s studio your thoughts had shifted to the older male as you wondered if the last encounter between you two was the reason why the artist wasn't seen roaming around the halls as often as he did a few weeks prior. 

Slowly opening the heavy wooden door, your eyes began to soak up the various colors that painted the walls. Usually Jinyoung  liked his studio’s walls to be a light grey with black borders on each side. But today the walls were decorated in colorful images on different types of drawing papers. Most of the art works were sketches of birds, cats, and buildings. But one seemed to be an old woman sitting down on a train station bench. Her facial expression was stressed as there were large shopping bags on either side of her thin legs.  

Looking closer at the drawing, her pale hands had wrinkles and even several veins sprinkled about. One hand resting on her lap as the other tried to keep her bags from falling to the ground. Anyone looking at the piece could see that the weight this elderly woman carried  on her was more than just from the bags. And that’s what made it beautiful.  How Jinyoung was able to create something so detailed as well as meaningful was something you would never comprehend.

Allowing yourself to explore more of the artwork around the room, your eyes stopped at the artist’s desk as the sketch he was working on the same day of his breakdown rested on top. It was of you resting on the couch as your hands were lifted into the air. A small smile was on your lips yet your eyes were closed as though you were blushing. 

Fingers running along the edges of the paper, as you soaked up the masterpiece in front of you, you were thankful that Jinyoung had asked you to be his muse. It allowed the two of you to have intimate moments together that no one else in the house would understand. Jinyoung was the only person you would talk to when you felt the most alone. He was your first friend when you entered the mansion and soon became your best friend along with sharing intimacy that went beyond sexual. 

Setting the drawing aside, your eyes were fixated on a yellow bottle that had a prescription for ‘Clozapine’ written on it. Not knowing what the specific medication was used for, you began to look it up on your cell phone. With the knew found information, your eyebrows pulled together in confusion as you tried to process the possibility of the artist having schizophrenia.  Did he tell anyone else about it? Does Jaebum or Jackson know? They must have. But why did he hide this from you all of this time? Of course everyone is entitled to sharing their own personal matters in time when they feel comfortable enough. But why didn’t you see any signs that something serious was going on with the other? Heart feeling heavy, you placed the pills down where you found them and sighed. 

“Oh Jinyoungie...” 

You had to speak with him. 

____

“Look Jae that’s all I was able to get on them. They’re playing warehouse employees to the T” Jackson shrugged his shoulders as him and the brunette reviewed the security cameras. “You told me Yongguk would be here tomorrow night to pick up the cargo. Now whatever happens once that shit leaves the building is not our concerns. I’m not trying to have this company get into hot water over this scum.” The blonde spat at the mere thought of Yongguk setting front anywhere near IM company or him.

 “Mmm you’re right. It’s one thing selling our own supply we can handle the heat but Yongguk has heat of his own I don’t want on my ass.” Jaebum agreed. Mentally punching himself for actually going through with the plan, the brunette could only hope that everything goes according to plan or else Yonnguk would have more than hell to pay. ”But like it or not the man has ties in places we’ve been trying to get into for months. And with the Bangtan Guys getting even more popular within the underground scene we can’t afford to lose ground there either.”  

Letting out a huff in agreement Jackson rose from his seat and made his way towards the door of Jaebum’s office. There was no need to stay and watch four men lifting buckets of cement. “Whatever, but when Yongguk gets here I definitely won’t be. I can’t stand to see his face after everything that happened to you.” “Yeah well I’m dealing with that in my own way. But for now...let’s just get this money.” ___

“Daddy’s home!!!! Please tell me there’s pizza left I’m starving.” Bambam yelled out from the entrance as the rest of the men dragged their tired bodies towards the living room. Limbs thrown across pillows and armrests to say finishing up working 10 hours on a Saturday was draining was an understatement. 

“Umm...No we’re going to have baked chicken with veggies tonight.  And Pizza?! We had that like 4 hours ago I’m definitely not having that twice in one day” Natalie shook her head as she went over to Youngjae and handed him a bottle of water. Getting a smile and a loving stroke of the young male’s fingers against her shoulder made her shiver with excitement. It seemed the two young adults were spending more time together and the rest of the house knew it was only a small matter of weeks before they would become official like Mark and Hana. 

“Umm...Jae, do you mind if we spoke in private for a second.” Sumin hesitantly walked up to her boss as she noticed the sudden arch of his left eyebrow. Maybe if she was to actually explain what’s been going on in her mind to Jaebum he would understand where she was coming from. 

“Yeah sure...” He motioned for her to follow as they made their way towards his office. Once there, Jaebum eased himself in his office chair as he looked up at Sumin standing in front of him. “What’s up?” He asked slightly annoyed that he might have to deal with another argument with Sumin instead of filling up his empty stomach. 

“Okay so the last time we actually spoke I was calling you an asshole and I really don't want that to happen again. The truth is; I’m kind of disappointed that you wouldn’t accompany me to my Busan opening. It was something extremely important to me and I just wanted you to be there. As support. I mean you’re the only one in this house that actually helped me out with my boutiques and I just thought….I don’t know I really just wanted a friend there that’s all” Sumin confessed as her eyes didn’t dare to look the other in the face, afraid to see the look of rejection coming for her. “We’ve been working together for nearly 4 years now and I felt as though we created a bond between us that was along the lines of friends. And the other day just seemed as though you didn’t see me as more than just a simple fuck and not as Sumin. A friend.” She added even though a friend was less than what she really wanted to be considered to Jaebum. But revealing her feelings would only lead to hurt and she couldn’t face that just yet. So being a friend to the other would be good enough at the moment.

“Look Sumin, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to come off that way. That day wasn’t a good day for me at all. You know more or less what’s been happening with Yongguk and I was on edge. But you’re right I should have been there for you. As you said… We’re friends” Jaebum looked into her eyes as he emphasized the word for her to understand that was all that was going to happen between the two. A friendship with the designer was the best thing that could work for them. Their personalities were too strong for anything beyond that to work out and Jaebum knew she wanted more but he wouldn’t be able to give it to her. Maybe after their talk both parties would be on the same page again. Reaching out to pull the petite girl close to him, his arms wrapped around her hips as he smiled. “I care for you a lot Sumin and I will always be here for you but I can’t be someone's boyfriend. I just can’t.” He spoke before raising one of her hands to place a soft kiss on it trying to ease the rejection he spilled on her.  

His words hurt. They hurt so much Sumin thought that if she didn’t leave now, her eyes would betray her and the tears would begin to fall. But to her surprise, they never slipped out once he placed that kiss to her hand. That kiss was enough for her to hope that if they couldn’t be together now, one day he would realize that she was the one for him. And until then she would be waiting, Waiting for Jaebum. “And I don’t want a boyfriend. I just want you Jaebum, I want your friendship” She reassured the other and ran her hands through his now shoulder length black hair. If friendship was all she was going to get, she would hang on to it until the time came for them to become one. She was willing to hang on to that hope. 

No matter how long. 

[theforce]

presumptive horrible rotten case of corona: symptoms

presumptive bc i couldnt get a god damn test i live in new york and while there are testing sites all over the state and our state govt is doing what they can now, i don’t want to be the person taking away a test from someone else especially now that i am mostly better, most of this went down at the beginning of the month and i’m still dealing with the effects of it. 

there was a lot of confusion here even as recent as 2 weeks and we are the state that’s testing more than the rest of the entire country so here is my account of what went down w me, and honestly, what might go down with you or someone you know as soon as this reaches your state

1) i threw up all night long, thought it was a stomach virus, had a lot of stomach issues for like 24 hours, very strange i haven’t had a stomach virus in YEARS since i was a literal child, anyways right before i started puking up my life i developed this weird cough, it felt like it was from my throat, like i was trying to clear it? but it was often and annoying 

2) after my 24 hours of hell i felt feverish and exhausted but i chalked it up to being on the floor of the bathroom all night, exerting my esophagus and body to throw up the devil himself, i tried to sleep it off, i woke up a few hours later in a fog, i was shivering but i was also burning up, i couldn’t tell left from right, up from down, my fever was 100.3, at this point i had my mom call my doctor and make an appointment, she made it for me w the receptionist, everything was fine until 20 minutes later i got a call back from my actual doctor not the receptionist who was like, oh no not you’re not coming here with those symptoms baby and i was like ?? ok cool thanks, she said to keep watching my symptoms, slam some tylenol and if i felt shortness of breath to call or text her personal cell phone and she would get me set up at the nearest hospital i said ok sounds fucked up i mean i didn’t say that bc i was too fucked up to even speak, she also gave my mom instructions to keep me in my room, to not go near me, to give me a designated bathroom, to have food and water delivered to my door, my mom was like u dont gotta tell me twice (she has lupus) during this time my cough become dry and horrible, i could feel my lungs rattle, i would cough so hard and for so long i’d wake from my feverish coma to kneel over my bed and just let loose on the world, it felt like i was drowning, i couldn’t get enough air everything hurt, everything was sore 

3) things continued on like this for 5 straight days, i was literally in and out of consciousness, my fever got up to 102 and my mom said that if it raised at all from there we were going to the fuckin hospital and i was like listen la rona i know u wanna take me out but i havent even ever eaten a krispy kreme donut, please let me survive this i can’t leave this way, in that moment i literally had a fever dream of god herself, i said take this from me and i’ll stop being such a cunt in life. i started slamming hot toddy’s, i’d drink as much water as possible in between the time i wasnt literally trying to expel my lungs by way of my mouth

4) woke up from that whole ordeal drenched in SWEAT from my feet to my head i was soaked, it was gross, at that point i still had a sense of smell so let me tell you my last and final symptom should have kicked in a bit earlier but i checked my temp and it was normal! i didn’t feel like my head was going to explode! but i had new things going on i had a new stuffy/runny nose, my cough was producing some liquid which i proceeded to throw up into a mcdonalds cup i took a shower, i brushed my teeth, i felt like a brand new woman, i had cold like symptoms but i can live with cold like symptoms, i had an appetite for the first time in a week, felt like i could eat my whole family out of house and home given the opportunity, i’d lost 20 pounds in less than 2 weeks and ya girl was honestly, looking good but THAT’S A BAD WAY OF THINKING disregard please thank you, at this point i went into my doctor with a full on mask, gloves, hair pulled back, she gave me every test you can think of, most importantly a flu test which is all she could do since getting a test was impossible at this pint, which of course came back negative 

5) things continued like this for weeks, up until right now actually, exhaustion was gone, fever gone, cough still here and there but not like how it was, i’ve put on makeup in my room, i’ve watched every season of law and order svu, i’ve gone on drives in my car just to drive, i’ve tried to keep myself as busy as possible, 3 days ago the strangest, most inexplicable and hopefully last symptom arrived, a complete loss of smell and bc of that taste, i’ve tried smelling candles, essential oils, laundry detergent, canned meat, my brother lit a match with my back turned and asked me what the smell was, i ate extra hot cheetos, raw onions, shot of vinegar, there’s nothing there, i just hope it comes back 

during this time i haven’t been even close to my mother, who has lupus or my sister, who has asthma, i stayed in my room, i’m still in my room actually 14 full days out from the last time i left the house, one month since this whole thing started, i eat in my room, i use a different bathroom than my whole family, everyone talks to me from my door frame besides my little brother who also was sick but recovered super fast, he bleaches the bathroom after i use it, he puts all my food on single use plates, he brings me jugs of water and reminds me of what it’s like to at least talk to another person. 

on a more serious note, i haven’t touched another person in 20 days nobody has even been within 6 feet of me besides my doctor who was administering the only tests she could administer, fully decked out in a hazmat suit, she was scared for me, i could tell, she was trying to put on a brave face and downplay the severity of my symptoms but thank god for her, she’s checked up on me, she’s tried everything, she’s put in calls, she’s made herself as available as possible even though she’s probably going through the same thing with countless other patients, i worry for her, i’ve worried for my family, i’ve stressed beyond the point of no return which has for sure slowed my recovery and i was one of the lucky ones! all of this and my case was considered mild because i never really had trouble breathing beyond being choked by my own coughing. 

people have been there for me during all of this, in ways that are further reaching than touch, i have been very vocal about not liking when people touch me but i do look forward to the day i can hug my mom, where i can tell my friend to take a sip of my drink to see if she likes it, to have someone pat me on the shoulder and tell me to keep my head up or whatever 

hopefully im on the other side of this, my more at risk family members are about to be 14 days from the last time any of them were near me or my brother, they’re at the end of a long tunnel and i’m just so happy that maybe soon we’ll all see the light 

take care of yourselves

[lettersofsky]

An Agreement

Ok, so I have two characters that I’ve been fleshing out and developing on their own and decided to try writing them together as they’re supposed to be for once! So I wrote something to try playing around with the two of them and another of my characters in a fun little thing to actually get myself back into writing. Especially to make myself try to describe characters more as I write them which I’m pretty awful at XD

Mihal, Duelek and Orrin are all mine This is a kind of mythical creature/monster au of sorts! Mihal and Duelek are both kinda finned snake people things. Enjoy!

Ko-Fi

~

“Ya shouldn’ta bothered with ‘im.”

“He needed help though.”

“Ain’t no problem a ours none.”

“I be known but still… ain’t wanted ta leave him out there like that.”

“Woulda been his own fault.”

Orrin groaned, alerting the two arguing voices to the fact that he was returning to consciousness from the empty darkness of rest accompanied by a vicious pounding in his skull. He lifted his hand to his glass-covered clenched shut eyes, trying to further shade and protect them from the weak spring sun above him trying to pierce into his skull aided by the lenses that usually assisted him in the task of perceiving the world around him, only to find his path blocked by a different pair of hands, cold and wet and… off in a way he couldn’t quite make sense of.

“Ya real shouldn’t be touchin ‘im.”

“Hush yaself,” the snap was soft, distracted and from somewhere directly over Orrin’s face, contrasting the rougher voice that sounded a bit further away. Then there’s an odd cooing accompanied by the feeling of thumbs rubbing the skin of his cheeks, nails of some kind as well. “He’s needin help, we should be givin it.”

“I tried.”

“I said hush,” a sharp edge entered the voice above his head and Orrin flinched ever so slightly, drawing attention back to himself and a shadow over his face. “Ya alright?”

“I… do not believe so,” he groaned again, blue eyes squinting open so he could see exactly who was above him. “My head feels—” He cut himself off as the individual shading him from the shadow over his face came into focus.

A human face, skin dark in colour than Orrin himself was, if not for the purple scales lining it, settled around eyes that were dark and empty similar to that of a snake and fanning across sharp cheeks and their forehead leading into long, dark brown water-soaked curls. There were a set of fins to either side of the face above him, fluttering and fanning out in rapidly increasing motions.

This certainly wasn’t a human.

The creature drew it’s hands back towards itself at Orrin’s silence and inspection, curved fangs biting into it’s bottom lip as Orrin looked to them itself of the face over his. While humanoid at a glance it was obviously that instead of fingers it had claws, each one ended in a chipped nail far longer than any Orrin had ever seen before and covered completely in scales in every shade of purple from the elbow to the joint of it’s fingers.

“Told ya ya was better off leavin ‘im be.” The voice comes from somewhere behind the individual over Orrin and it turns back to hiss at the other voice, a short, low sound reminiscent of an annoyed or irritated snake.

“Shut up!” The fins on the side of it’s head flared out in a striking contrast of colour against the darkness of it’s hair. “S’just a little scared, s’all.”

“Scared and gonna tell people ‘bout this shit.” The other shot back, sounding much calmer than there was any right to be whilst implying that it was better to dispose of Orrin than not.

“If I could interject,” Orrin spoke around a pained noise as he forced himself to sit up, finally getting a better look at the first individual as well as his first on the other in the scenario, carefully pushing himself back from their proximity ever so slightly. The other was very similar to the first, if a bit sharper in it’s face and the sharp line of it’s shoulders, or what Orrin could see of them from where it was reclining on the shore of the nearby lake, arms folded and chin resting upon them. It’s hair was shorter than the first’s as well and closer to a black than the deep brown of the other. Both of them had long tails where their waist and legs should have been, bright scales glittering and shifting in colour tone before his eyes as they twitched and shifted gently, tipped with a pair of fins similar to those at the side of their heads.

Wholly inhuman and nothing Orrin should have ever involved himself with. Though how he had come to do so was a mystery to him.

“I will not—”

“Nah.”

“Excuse me?”

It was the other one that had spoken and cut him off, chin rested on scaled claws, nails scoring into the wet soil at the edge of the lake. It’s eyes were half-lidded, hair fallen into it’s face and remaining stuck there in clumps of water-soaked strands. It rolled empty eyes at him, lips pulling back just enough to show off rows of needle-sharp teeth.

“Ain’t caring ‘bout whatever ya have ta ‘interject’ with,” it said, tail moving lazily in the water, a blur of formless purple. It’s lips pulled back further, baring more of it’s teeth and the stark white of it’s gums. “So shut yaself ‘fore I drag ya back under.”

“… that is incredibly rude of you.”

It’s all Orrin can really think in that moment and it’s far from what he wanted to say to the thing that was threatening him. It seemed that the two of them weren’t expecting to hear anything like that either if they way they both turned to stare at him in question was to go by, fins fluttering and head tilted similarly to a dog’s.

“Tryin ta be amusin ain’t helpin ya much.”

“We can’t just be makin threats afta savin ‘im!”

“I can,” the farther one dropped further back from the inquisitive lift it’d taken up at Orrin’s words, placing it’s chin back onto it’s folded arms, peering at Orrin from the corner of it’s eye, face turned towards the other. “I didn’t save ‘im.”

“Ya can’t—!”

“What if I swear myself to silence?” Orrin questioned, cutting off the softer of the two off as he felt that things were taking a turn for the dangerous. “Swear to not saying anything about either of you to anyone? Would that be enough?”

“Shake on it.”

“He doesn’t need ta—”

“He does.” The words rung with finality and Orrin felt his heart freeze in his chest, unsure of wht exactly what the rougher of the two was suggesting entailed but not sure he liked it either way. “If he don’t then Imma drag ‘im back down. No matta what ya want.”

“But…”

“I will do it. I will shake on it.”

The two creatures turn back to him, the sharper looking pleased with his decision while the other’s face fell. His decision made Orrin chose to focus on the sharper of the two, meeting half-lidded eyes as levelly as he was able.

“Good. Go on bro, he’s wantin ta make the deal.”

The softer of the two looks between Orrin and the other, fins fluttering before they pressed close to its skull and it turned back to Orrin, face turned towards its own hands.

“Ok.” It breathed, tail stretching out as it shifted closer to Orrin, offering it’s claw towards him. “Promise not ta be speakin’ ‘bout us ta no other and shake.”

Orrin hesitated a moment, just a moment as he looked at the outstretched hand, offering his own when he heard the noticeable sound of water moving and taking it, the tone of his own skin a lighter contrast to the creature’s own.

There’s a sting, a bite where the tips of its nails sink shallow indents into Orrin’s skin, his eyes move away from the one watching the proceeding to see something like ink curl from the indents into a band at his wrist, cleanly encircling the flesh in a brand that would lead to nothing but question.

“Is that all?” That didn’t really seem to have much of any kind of purpose really, aside from the ink on his wrist that the creature holding his hand had raised his captive arm towards its face to inspect.

“S’alright,” there was an air of contentedness about the onlooker’s voice as Orrin’s hand was releasing, the creature stretching it’s torso out on the edge of the lake in a lazy sprawl. “Ain’t gone be able ta get ta chatterin with that, free ta do what ya want now.”

Orrin blinked, opened his mouth to say something only to stop as the one closest to him spoke up. “So he can stay, yeah?”

“What?” “Excuse me?”

It wilts a bit at both of their attention focused onto it, shoulders hunching up closer to the fins pressed tight to the side of it’s skull once more, voice losing volume and becoming shaky as it continued. “Iffin… Iffin he wants a course… ya said he could do whatever he wants now that he’s…” it trails off into mumbling that Orrin can’t catch and catch be sure that the onlooker didn’t.

“… suppose yeah.” Orrin’s attention snapped back to the onlooking creature who seemed uninterested in the situation once more, inspecting the nails of it’s own claws with a languid pace. “Iffin he be wantin’ ta.”

Remaining here for any length of extended time did not really sound too appealing to him, but saying so outright might be rude and he didn’t know how either would take such an abrupt and clear dismissal of his continued presence on their lakefront.

Even more so when the softer of the two turned back to him, a gleam in it’s eye and small, hopeful smile on it’s face. “Mayhaps… ya could stay a bit? S’not… S;probably s’not real good ta move too soon, yeah? Ya should stay here a bit and rest, yeah?”

“I think I should leave.”

It’s smile drops and its fins droop, arms crossing over it’s torso as blank eyes turned away from Orrin to focus on some point at the ground.

“Oh.”

“Lookit you bein all heartbreakin afta he saved ya ass, rude.”

“I am completely soaked,” Orrin continued, ignoring the cold near snarl from the water. “I more than likely have an untreated concussion and I need to go be looked over and change before I freeze to death.”

The closest of the two perks up at his words, brows furrowing and mouth twisting as it splayed it’s claws out towards him, missing Orrin’s flinch even if the further of the two creature’s didn’t, motioning him off with small, quick motions. “Ya right! Ya warm blooded ones get cold and sick from the water, ya should go, it’s bein for the best.”

“Ya just—”

“It’s for the best.” It repeats, tail stretching out more from the curl of it Orrin had yet to notice as it pressed closer towards him, putting it’s face only a scant few inches from Orrin’s own as if to inspect him better. “Ain’t wantin ta waste hard work by ya gettin sick on us, yeah? Then ya really wouldn’t come back.” It chuckles the last little add-on but it rings hollow and aching, accompanied by it’s fins fluttering and flaring away from the side of it’s head.

Orrin looked between it and the other, teeth biting into his bottom lip and considering what to do now. It would be simply enough to take the opportunity granted and leave, escape and never come back. It wasn’t as if these creatures could really come and track him down, at least he certainly hoped they wouldn’t, whatever they were.

He was free to go, free to stand up and leave the lakefront and never look back on or think about it again. It was so easy to do.

“I will… try to return when I am… able to stay longer.” Or perhaps he could put his foot into his mouth and give another promise to these creatures, as if the first hadn’t been enough to cement how awful an idea it was to do so into his head.

It brightens up the creature in front of him though and it grins at him, showing off the odd backwards curve of it’s teeth towards the back of it’s own throat.

“Then we’ll be waitin ta see ya again!” It pauses, brow furrowing at Orrin. “Ain’t real knowin’ what ta call ya.”

“Orrin,” he doesn’t mention anything about his last name and that seems to be more than enough for the creature to return to grinning at him.

“Orrin.” It repeats, the name sounding a little off on it’s vocals. “Ya can call us Mihal and Duelek, yeah? For next time.”

“I will… keep those in mind for when I return.”

[cakemakethme]

Where The Heart Is , 4.2k , Rating T+

Tags: Magical AU, angst, first kisses, fluff, Sid and Geno hopefully being Sid and Geno

For the @sidgenophotochallenge

completely unbeta’d and uneditied. im really nervous as this is the first time I’ve truly written sidgeno. That and the fact that I wrote almost 4.3k of it freaks me out. I made the moodboard first and then decided at the last min YESTERDAY NIGHT to write the fic that would go along with it. So please forgive all the writing and tense errors, I don’t ever write fic.

~

It's such a sharp pull in his chest that trying to ignore it would have felt like a slow death. Sid’s family all warned him not to go, everyone gathered in his living room as if was some sort of strange intervention.

“Sid,” His mother pleaded, “You’ll need to be gone for an entire year! Isolated in that forest! We might lose you forever!” She added tearfully. He knew the risk and it was so hard knowing what he was doing to them. His family looking at him like he was about to walk to his death. He probably was for all he knew. Sid heard all about the stories of people never coming back. Sometimes, if they do come back, they come back completely wrong. Usually missing more than what they had before going in to recover what they lost.

Sid carefully takes her hands in his, trembling “I know, mom, I really do but I can't stop this feeling that if i don’t go now, it’ll be gone forever, whatever it is that was taken from me in the first place. It feels so empty inside mom please understand. I need to go. I love you so much.” Sid looks up at everyone else, “ I love you all so much.” He gently squeezes her hands before lets them go and dashes out the front door.

“Sid wait!” It's Taylor and he stops and closes his eyes.

“Taylor please…”

She catches up to him and holds him tight but then she releases him and just as quickly, she wraps a handmade scarf around his neck. “Be safe Sid, I believe in you.” Taylor whispers to him and runs back into the house, closing the door behind herself.

Sid settles his nose briefly into the scarf, takes a deep breath and steels himself.

It’s time to go.

~

Sid had decided to start his years journey in the forest in the summer.He had actually wanted to start sooner than that but he couldn't. Either way, It made sense to him to start without worrying about the cold snowy nights straight away. He could get used to setting up camp, breaking it down and such and set up his routine. He has time now to prepare for the winter months that seemed so far away. Sid can’t deny that he made the correct choice however, because the moment he stepped into the faes forest, the weight in his chest seemed to lift ever so slightly.  The first month or so, he sleeps better than he ever had before. Most of Sids dreams are filled with a warmth, surrounding him. Even though he feels well rested, there are mornings that he wakes up with tear tracks on his face. He couldn't explain them other than the fae were probably messing with him, perhaps making him miss his family even though he didn’t remember them in those dreams at all.

Soon enough, the leaves started to change their colors and the nights were a becoming a bit colder. Sid would wrap Taylors scarf around just a little tighter on those days and gets to working on making more piles of wood quickly with his hatchet and storing the wood so it would get soaked with water. Sid found a wonderful clearing as near to the middle of the forest as he guesses. There's a pond close by where he’s been fishing regularly and every once in a while, Sid will explore out to check on his traps.

Its during one of these trips near the abandoned railroad tracks where he sees him. He's so tall and long limbed that at first, Sid thinks he might be fae, but he's walking along the tracks slowly, muttering to himself in a deep accent. It's the accent somehow, that changes his mind about not approaching him. That, and the fact that Sid is so fucking lonely. For as long as he’s been in the forest, he hasn't seen a sign of anyone else.

Sid clutches his hatchet a little tighter and noisily steps out of the trees to alert the stranger instead of shouting out to him. It works and he turns around quickly, his body stiff. It’s a little bit funny, those sleepy looking eyes wide and looking so shocked at seeing another person.

Sid can’t help but giggle and give a little wave. Unfortunately, it’s the hand that's holding the hatchet and of course the stranger's gaze immediately goes to it and he starts to back away.

“OH! No, sorry! Please, it’s okay! Sorry! I wasn’t sure if you were, you know, er, human?” Sid quickly puts his hand down and lets his grip on the handle loose letting it hang from the cord wrapped around his wrist. The stranger raises his eyebrows at that but his expression mellows out. “What you think I am, bear?” He gestures his long arms at his equally long and tall body.

Sid shakes his head but laughs “Yeah, well, you’re lumbering around like one, eh?” It’s so easy talking to this guy and he doesn't even know his name. Shit. “Sorry, again. Um, I’m Sid” He pauses but decides to go for it “ I started my years journey in the summer. Are...are you here for the year too?” He asks cautiously.

The strangers eyes lose the playfulness they were starting to develop. “Yes,” He answers solemnly. “I start end of spring. Feel like Im here for year already.” He looks down and his body immediately looks defeated. It looks wrong on him.

Sid nods in understanding and sighs. The stranger sighs back in response. “Am very sorry. You find me and all you get is sad story.” He slightly grins “You can call me Geno. Is very nice to meet you Sid.”

Sid smiles and Geno smiles wider in return. “it’s great to meet you Geno.”

~

Geno, miraculously, decides to join him.

His large ever present company is so welcomed, Sid doesn't know how he didn’t go crazy when he was alone before running into Geno.

Of course, that’s not to say that Geno doesn't drive him crazy in other ways. Sid had quickly adjusted his routine to include Geno with Geno seamlessly fitting in. Well, almost.

“No, Sid I'm tell you this is best way to hang fish! How you even survive this long??”  Geno grabs at the string of fish and fixing it his way.

Sid is flabbergasted. “How did I survive? You didn't even have the proper socks packed away for the winter! You’re lucky I had extra pairs or else you’d be saying goodbye to that height come winter!”

Geno mouth twitches and Sid knows a chirp is coming “Oh, don't have to worry. Still be taller than you, Sid. Anyway, was going to be fine! Maybe I make warm socks with squirrels or something- hey! why you laughing at me?”

Sid can’t help it and throws a piece of burned wood at him, laughing “Oh my god, Geno! Shut up!”

“Sid! Why you trying to do now? What danger you are in this forest!” Geno chuckles deeply back at Sid. Geno takes the burned wood cinder piece and starts to quietly sketch on a flat part of the large stone they lay out meat, a small warm smile on his face. Sid shakes his head and picks up the fish, proceeding to fix them up his way anyway. Sids pretty sure Geno just wanted to get out of the task and Sid just gave him an easy out. He feels very okay with it and he’s not sure why.

~

Sid walks around camp later, routinely preparing it for the night when he comes across the rock and he stops. He can't help but drop to his knees.

There, Geno has sketched him perfectly except the expression is so alien to him. How could Geno have captured this look of utter besottedness. His eyes looking off to the side, crinkled and warm, full of… of love? His smile large and crooked mid-laugh. He quickly looks up, scanning for Geno and finding him fussing around inside his own tent. Sid looks back down at his sketched face and his heart flutters. The empty feeling in his chest had become a small dull ache these days. Sid quietly gets up and heads back to his tent.

~

Sid can’t sleep.

Geno can’t either if the constant moving around says anything.

“Geno.” Sid quietly whispers to him and the noises next door stops.

“Yes, Sid?” He whispers back. “Am sorry if I'm keeping you awake.”

“No, sorry it’s not you,” He reassures him “it’s just” Sid sighs “Do you think, when this is over, we’ll get our answers?”

Geno is quiet and still and Sid is afraid he finally passed out or doesn't want to talk about it.  It's usually a hit or miss whenever Sid brings it up, but then Geno answers softly “Fae world so mysterious, Sid. Sometimes you just need to believe it happen. This all a test if we deserve what we lose, I feel this.” He hears Geno shift and then Geno presses his hand against the walls of the tents. “We gonna be okay Sid.”

Sid shudders a breath and reaches out to press his hand to Genos. His hand is so warm.

“Okay, Geno.” Sid bites his lip “Thank you.”

“Goodnight Sid.”

Sid turns over, shifts his scarf around and sleeps.

~

It’s so warm again. Sid feels it,as a lightness in his chest and enveloped around him. It feels like an amused laugh, like a playful shove and he doesn't want it to end. It almost feels like plush warm lips and large hands. It's so, so familiar and Sid is lost not knowing what it's supposed to mean.

~

Sid startles awake because Geno is there, in his tent calling out to him and reaching for him. He's looking at Sid with such a terrible expression. Suddenly, Sid is wide awake because something is so obviously very wrong.

“Geno, what's wrong??” he sits up and reaches for Genos shoulders, steadying him.

“Sid, no! Are you okay? What you mean what wrong? You, you make noise like you...” Genos hands reach up and cup his face, his thumb grazing his cheekbone wiping away the tears apparently still flowing there. “I’m never hear such pain, Sid.”

“Oh”, Sid realizes what's happened. Those dreams stopped suddenly around fall when he had found Geno. Sid had completely forgotten about them.

Sid can't look at Geno, he feels so embarrassed he can't face him. “I'm so sorry for waking you up Geno. Please, just forget about this and go back to sleep” he starts to try and turn his body away when suddenly, Geno is holding him tightly.

It's like a dam breaking and Sid is helpless to try and stop. He's sobbing into Genos chest and Geno is quietly and softly reassuring him in Russian. Geno shifts them and then they're laying down, a hand rubbing Sids back soothing him. “Is okay Sid, is okay. I'm be here okay?” Genos whispers into his hair. Sid slowly quiets down and feels Genos arms gently holding him closer and exhaustion takes over him.

~

Sid expects to feel awkward when he wakes up but it isn't even waking up in Genos arms. Geno doesn't bring up what happened that night and instead jokes about how Sid numbed his arm and therefore can't help with morning duties.Geno does become more tactile than before and Sid doesn't hate it, leaning into him more.

Geno also decides that they should start sharing a tent from that day on because it's getting colder and frost is starting to appear.

“Is for the best Sid, I'm freeze to death alone, so is best to warm up one tent together, yes?”

Sid for sure, isn't going to argue with the logic but he's not going to give in THAT easily. “I dunno, G. You do snore pretty loud sometimes. Could be good to scare away animals.” he takes off running with Geno giving chase “I show YOU BIG SNORE! “

Sids honking back with laughter “What does that even mean? You don't make sense Geno!”

He looks back in time to see Geno promptly slip on some wet leaves and eat it.

Geno wails on the ground not moving “So mean to me! Gonna stay here forever. Let the ground eat me.”

Sid walks back to him, giggling, leans over, and gives him a hand to help him up. “No, you won't.”

Geno smiles back at Sid and takes his hand “No, guess not.”

~

It's nice when winter finally comes. Sid has never felt so warm. Well, he can't say the same about Geno who seems to have taken any and all the extra clothing Sid had packed for himself.

There's even another, longer scarf that Taylor made for him in there that Geno immediately claims. Each day is not without Geno complaining about the cold.

~

Sid is sitting by the fire, cooking up some stew when Geno comes back with some more firewood looking like he's ready to mount an expedition to the arctic.

Sid can't help but laugh and gestures towards Genos face. “I think you missed a spot there.”

Genos visible eyes narrow followed by some angry muffling noises.

“You don't say! “ Sid can't help but tease as he pokes the fire a bit. “I don't know if you'll survive long enough to uncover your mouth to even eat this Geno. Truly tragic.” Sid looks up in time to see Geno give him the stink eye. Geno then reaches up with his thickly padded gloves to uncover his face.

“I'm tell you, this lasting much longer than other months! Is unnatural Sid!” He tries to cross his arms but can't.

Sid makes a noise, acknowledging that he heard him and lifts the pot cover to check on the food. He discovered the same thing early on and didn't say anything for Genos sake. If it's a test like Geno said it was, they can't do anything about it anyway except push on.

He carefully looks up and finds Geno is already looking at him, with a thoughtful expression and nods in silent understanding.

“Oh, hey Sid! I'm find bottle I bury in first snow.” he reaches into his bag, pulling out some Russian vodka and shakes the bottle at Sid “think it pair with rabbit stew?” He waggles his eyebrows at and Sid can't help but giggle.

“Yeah, I'm think it just might.”

They sit as close as they can eating right out of the pot and passing the bottle back and forth between each other. The fire casting the light warmly and illuminating the pinking cheeks that darken and flush as the bottle becomes lighter. Sid can't help but reach out and touch and Geno cuts short the story he can't finish, giggling at the funny parts he has yet to say out loud.

Sid can't help but notice how Genos eyes darken and how he leans his head into Sids touch. How he wishes he wasn't wearing gloves at that moment. “Geno.. “ Sid licks his lips and Geno, very carefully takes Sid's gloved hand and gives it a light kiss. Sid shudders.

“Sid, we drink too much. Best sleep first make sure we know what we doing. Okay?”

Sid is disappointed, but really he's too drunk to try and argue that he's fine. So he lets himself be led back to tent,with a canteen of water set next to his head as he settles in. His head is so fuzzy yet he feels like he's about to fall but then he feels the pressure of thing being piled on and around him to keep him warm.

Then it's still and quiet and Sid can hear himself breathing heavy. He fucked up. He can't believe he did that. Is Geno setting up his tent again? Thoughts swirl around in his head until he can hear Geno coming back into the tent and zipping it closed behind him.

“G… Geno?”

“Yes, here. Had to clean up and put out fire. Am here now Sid.” Geno gets into the warmth and up close behind Sid, wrapping an arm around his midsection. “Sleep Sid.”

Sid swears he feels the pressure of a light kiss on his neck before he succumbs to sleep.

~

When Sid blinks himself awake, he’s immediately aware of an arm holding him tightly, his back flushed against Genos front. He can feel Genos breath tickling the hairs on the back of his neck. He spots the water and carefully drinks it, swishing and gulping water until it’s empty. He’s completely clear headed right now and he knows what he wants.

He starts to try and turn around, dislodging the arm around him in the process. Geno begins to stir awake as well. “Mmm Sid, Sleep. Is early.” He grumbles, trying to tuck his head into Sids neck.

“Geno come on, wake up. I'm not drunk anymore.” Sid snakes an arm out from under the covers and wraps it around Genos broad back, his fingers playing with the hair at Genos nape. Geno seems to purr and tucks himself further. Sid can’t help but softly giggle and gives a playful tug. He moves slightly back giving himself room to look down at Genos face. He spots a tiny curl playing at the edge of Genos mouth giving him away.

Geno slowly opens his eyes and smiles and looks at Sids mouth.

“I want so much, Sid,” Geno brings own his hand up to touch the side of Sids face, tucking a stray curl behind Sids ear ,” Is like sometimes, the heavy feeling right here, is gone.” Geno takes Sids other hand and presses it to his own chest, the identical location as his own fading emptiness.   

“I don’t know what it meaning, but I know for sure that Im not leave this forest without you Sid.” Geno looks nervous,” I wait with you till your year is finished and we go together. Is...is that okay, Sid?”

Sid can’t breathe for a moment then lets out a shaky breath “Yes, Geno please, I feel the same way. Will it be okay, though staying longer? I don’t want to risk you losing what you came here to find when you’re so close.”

Geno cups his face and brings Sids forehead close to his own. “I feel, deep inside, everything will be okay.” he slides his fingers down and gently touches Sids lower lip.

Sid can’t take the gentle teasing anymore, he’s breathing heavy and brings himself closer, closing his eyes. His intentions clear.

The moment their lips touch, Sid shivers and pulls Geno closer to himself, legs curling around Genos legs. Geno lets out a groan, kissing Sid deeper, nipping at his lips, finally free to have the mouth that had also been torturing him. It’s only a kiss but neither of them has ever felt anything like it. Every sound, every touch feels amplified. Every gasp and groan, fuels them.

“Geno, Geno, please,” Sid pleads, completely wrecked as he tilts his head up, exposing his neck. Geno takes the cue and begins to mouth at it, biting and sucking, loudly enjoying every inch. Sid can’t help but cling to his back, slotting his leg and encouraging Geno to move his own thigh between his legs.

Every point of contact feels overwhelming and Sid can’t have enough of it.

“Geno please, I want everything,” He lays back pulling Geno on top of him ,”I need you.”

Geno leans over him, lips red and kissed swollen, same as his own, and softly kisses him.

“Yes, Sid.” Geno whispers back ,” I give you all of me, everything.”

~

Winter seems to pass through much faster afterwards, as if the season remembered it had a time limit. Soon enough, the snows begin to melt and green shoots emerge.

It's Spring.

Sid is still nervous at the possibility of Geno losing everything because of him. The day comes quickly however and Sid decides he needs to be away for the moment, giving Geno his space.

“Sid, I tell you, will be okay.” He smiles and busses a kiss to Sids lips “If it make you feel better, go. Im be here when you come back.”

Sid takes a deep breath and nods “Okay, Geno. I’ll see you later then, yeah?” He smiles nervously.

“Yes, Sid,” Geno smiles warmly back,”I see you later.”

~

It’s dark. How did it get so dark so quickly.

Sid is panicking because he couldn't have been out for that long. it’s not possible. Then again he’s been in this forest long enough he should know better that the Fae don’t necessarily follow the rules as strictly.

He’s running as fast as he can back in the direction of the campsite when suddenly a bright light catches his eye.

“What the hell…” Sid trails off. It's the campsite and their tent is alight with an unearthly glow emanating from the inside. “Geno, oh no…”

Sid takes off running and the closer he gets, the light seems to fade away. “Please no, Geno please be there.”

He arrives at the tent when Geno opens the flap and stumbles out of it, wide eyed.

“Oh my god, Geno.” Sid gathers him into his arms. Genos seems to be slow and still in shock. “Geno, talk to me please.”

Just as quickly, Geno snaps out of the trance he was in. “Sid? You, you never go on walk?” He asks him confused.

“What? Geno look around, it’s dark! Did they give you back what you lost?” Sid is beginning to panic once again.

“Oh, yes… Sorry, Yes! they tell me! Sid!” Geno is excited, holding Sid close to his chest.

Sid raises his eyebrows and shakes his head “Well, go on then Geno! What was it it?”

“Oh, They tell me once I leave forest I will know. I pass test!”  Genos smile is so wide but Sid can’t help but be puzzled.

“You have to leave the forest to know what you lost?”

“Yes, Sid. Say I will know immediately. I tell you it be okay! Now we wait for you to pass test Sid and we leave forest together, yes?”

Sid shakes his head, “Geno, you can know now, are you sure…?”

“Sid, always so stubborn!,” He places both hands on Sids face, squishing his cheeks together,”I say is okay! We go together. Was plan, okay?”

Sid can’t help but smile, his eyes misty. “yeah, that's the plan G.”

~

It's wonderful having Geno with him. Sid is terrified when his year is finally over but when he looks across to Geno, hands moving wildly to a memory another childhood memory he's sharing he can’t help but feel relieved. He’ll not only be leaving the forest with whatever it was he lost, but he’ll also be leaving with Geno. Geno will forevermore be a part of Sids life. Sid can’t wait to start his new life out there with him.

Geno stops talking and watches how Sid hasn’t been paying any attention to him. So he quietly sneaks up tackles Sid gently onto the soft grass behind him.

“Geno, what the hell was that?” Sid can’t help but laugh because he knows what he did, he had hoped Geno didn’t notice his daydreaming. Sid tries to squirm away and looks up biting his lip.

“You, sitting there, looking so beautiful,” Genos looking at Sid like he can’t believe he’s real so he leans down and kisses Sid thoroughly.

~

It’s Summer and Geno sits outside of the tent waiting for Sid to be visited by the Fae.

Sids has his message and like Geno, he is told somehow, that the moment he leaves the forest he will get back what he had lost. He also passes the test.

There's a surreal feeling packing their lives for an entire year back up, knowing things are about to change for both of them very soon.

When they’re done, they both look around and smile. Geno turns to Sid and bumps his shoulder and smiles.

It’s time to go.

~

Soon enough, they can see the edge of the forest approaching and Sids stomach is in knots.

Geno however, looks completely at ease, walking a little faster. Those long legs taking up the distance faster than Sid is.

“Come on Sid! Is right there!” Geno shouts gleefully and suddenly he's making a run for it.

“Geno… Geno wait for me!” Sid is scared, his heart is beating so fast both with fear and with trying to catch up to Genos long strides. He’s panting and desperately trying to catch up. Sid see’s Geno run into the clearing, laughing then suddenly Geno stops and stands completely still.

“Geno, Geno what happened? Geno?” Sid reaches the edge and he hesitates. He takes a fortifying breath and steps through. He’s a few feet from Geno and then slowly Geno turns to look at him, almost exactly the way he did when they first met except… that's not right. That's not when they first...

“S..Sid?” Genos eyes widen and he drops everything he’s carrying “My god Sid, you...you’re MY Sid, I don’t… how we…?”

Then Sid remembers everything. His mouth drops and tears start to flow. He looks up at Geno, his... Zhenya? how could he have forgotten… Genos hand is covering his mouth and is crying just as hard.

Sid drops what he's carrying and they both run towards each other simultaneously, arms outstretched towards each other, hearts full and finally home.

[tumblunni]

OH FUCK I THINK I FINALLY CRACKED THE CODE OF WHY I ALWAYS LIKE THE VILLAINS BETTER

Like man it always makes me so confused cos i mean im a soft AF person and i always end up having sympathetic redemption headcanons for them so its not like i like VILLAINY ITSELF but what else do all these characters have in common?

Thats it. Thats it, ursula helped me crack it.

I just WANT THOSE TRAITS ON THE HEROES

I really want a nice confident sassy funny chubby trans auntie who promotes body positivity to our young hero and always gets to say the coolest lines and get the best moments and BE LOVED FOR WHO SHE IS

And like usually whenever you get anywhere close to seeing those "villain traits" on a hero they like.. Remove all the good parts. If you have a supportive hero aunt she's always boring and generically supportive instead, and has to look like the most stereotypical boring mess ans have a super small plot role and uuuugh thats IF SHES EVEN THERE i mean seriously aunties and grandmas are weirdly less represented as mentors than grandpas who are already REALLY HARD TO FIND and again OFTEN GENERIC AND UNFUN WHENEVER THEY GET TO APPEAR

And how damn often are we allowed to have a chubby gay aunt!! WHERE IS MY CHUBBY GAY AUNT!! ive met SO MANY chubby gay aunts in real life like 90% of all my psychologists have been either that or like.. The exact same but a straight lgbt ally instead. Sassy plus size aunties are THE BACKBONE OF OUR SOCIETY DAMMIT! I've had so much help thanks to sassy gay aunts!! And like even just looking at any damn crowd scene in a normal city centre youre gonna see so many chubby aunts and long nosed uncles and all those sorts of bullshit "ugly people" that mass media pretends are ugly and relegates to One Minor Role In The Entire Cast despite them being infinately more common than supermodels and NOT UGLY AT ALL GEEZ IT PISSES ME OFF SO MUCH

I cant believe im a fuckin disney villain fan cos of body positivity

Tfw u suck so bad at making hateable people that the fandom universally hugs all your villains and ignores your boring protagonists like fuckin TAKE THAT DIDNEY

God i wanna hug hades sooo bad he just needs a friend aaaaaa

And i mean its not just disney, every damn time ive obsessed over a villain its been because they have some trait thats supposed to be "bad" but its actually good and we dont get to see it on the heroes

Like my thing with science villains in particular is that when i first played ff7 i really liked the idea of an evil minion who's a bad sidekick not just because he's "dumb" or "bumbling" but because he's actually not interested in any of the evil stuff and he works against his own boss and is like.. Friendly to the heroes, i have no particular grudge against you and i wont stop you if im off duty and all. I liked the Turks for the same reason but in the origibal ff7 translation they were kind of stoic and serious and i didnt really become as much of a fan of them til i saw them being more goofy and comic relief in some optional sidequests and then their movie adaptation. But hojo was always being all "lol my boss's plan is so stupid amirite" and had that very memorable scene where he's just sunbathing and tells you everything you need to know to get to the next thing to ruin his boss's plan cos i mean fuck it who even cares im just here to soak up some sun while fully dressed in a turtleneck and labcoat. It sucked so much that he was such a reprehensible bastard with creepy sexual assault vibes and murder and child abuse and experimenting on people and basically just NOT A LOVEABLE VILLAIN but his CONCEPT held so much potential to be filled by a sympathetic character instead...

So yeah then cos of him i kept being obsessed with finding SOME CHARACTER SOMEWHERE that actually lived up tp that potential, and thats why i was instantly interested in charon from pokemon and totally on edge waiting for the slightest chance for him to become That Perfect Sass Gramps Of Legend. And then he was indeed sassy!! And had so little screenyime that there was potential for interpretation of him as potentially redeemable cos i mean the game never said he wasnt, the game barely said anything about him at all, lol. And he was so old and small and frail looking and i just wanted to protect him!! And then that one wifi event that actually hinted at synpatheticness!! Aaaa its a recipe for a Forever Fave~

And i guess maybe it all started with my grandma being awesome and me really missing her? Cos i had shitty abusive parents and she was my ONLY good family member who showed me what love was like. And she was also basically a supervillain. Like every damn supervillain trait except being evil! She was bombastic and confident and sassy and mischievious and loud and passionate about stuff and always had something funny to say and never gave up no matter how many times she failed. And she also used all that great power for the forces of good!

So yeh thats why i love sassy good guys and i hate that often even when a sassy villain gets redeemed they seem to lose all their edge and become more generic now theyre a good guy. Or they get totally sidelined with no screentime anymore, or they ONLY get to be comic relief and dont get the full and complex redemption they deserve. Or just a lot of bads!! Its never the simplest answer of just fuckin.. Keep the character the character. Thats kinda why i didnt feel too much for the maleficent movie even though the concept itself sounded like everything i ever wanted. The character in that movie is a very different person to origibal maleficent, she's more just a stoic tsundere mumsy figure than a hammy badass iconicness. Still a nice villain redemption but it felt like it would have been better as an original story instead of an attempted maleficent. Also i wish they handled it better with the whole "true love's kiss could be from your mum instead" thing cos i get sooooo grossed out whenever i see people shipping movie maleficent and aurora! Like yes sleeping beauty with lesbians would be great but not when one of them is old enough to be her mum and raised her like a mum and changed her goddamn diapers! Also why did they have to ruin the three good fairies just to make maleficent have the mum opportunity? Like just remove them from the story if you wanted maleficent to raise the kid instead. No need to rewrite them into incompetant assholes when they were everyone's fave part of the original! Dont sacrifice the rare and elusive Good Sassy Gay Aunts!! THEYRE LIKE THE ONLY ONES IN DIDNEY!!! (Incodentally merlin is the equivelant of this to hades as the fairies are to ursula)

Also also villains tend to have ACTUAL FLAWS in stories that have a more boring bland protagonist. I wanna see the story behind charon's neuroses and how he struggles with overcoming his temptation to be bad because of greed but ultimately manages to conquer his own negative side because power of friendship and such. Thats a great character arc that provides so much more than he does as a villain where they just wasted him entirely :(

SO BASICALLY IN SUMMARY

* villains are often more complex and well developed characters with flaws while the same wroter might make shitty heroes due to the illogical fear that nobody would root for them if they werent 100% perfect and successful at everything ever

* villains are also often made as negative stereotypes of minorities and other rarely seen traits, which means its easy to reach out to them and reclaim them as a more positive version when theres literally no other options for you to cling to

* the quite common accidental sympathy factor where a villain will seem to be hated more than they deserve for their actions, ir unjustly punished so much that they feel like an underdog, since the writer assumes you'll think theyre "more evil" for being a stereotype and if you dont agree that this thing is bad then it seems like they have way less sins than the story claims they do

* also sass. Sass is good.

But basically the whole root of it is that its stupid and cruel and doesnt goddamn work when you make villains bigoted stereotypes. It just makes me love them! The only person i hate when i see a stereotypical villain is the writer who thought that was a good idea, lol. Just imagine that meme of the samurai holding the cat but its me holding all disney villains!

Also even if a villain isnt outright intentionally meant to be "this minority is bad", it can still make me symoathetic to them if theyre still something thats rare amoung the hero side in the same series. Like charon being the "most unredeemable" villain despite being the most harmless and funny and his plan being so much less world destroying than cyrus, and also he's the only grandpa villain in like.. The whole of all. And he's drawn very much in that way thays supposed to be "ugly" i.e normal grandpa, vs that weird sort of younger than he looks grandpa that hero ones tend to be because blablabla beauty ewuals goodness anti body positivity whatever. Tho actually sinnoh was good with that, they had the best grandpa professor in my opinion cos he got to be sassy too! Rowan always reminds me of auron from ff10. Sinnoh was a good game where i liked a lot of both the heroes and villains even if i still had more villain faves cos i mean pokemon is always biased towards that for me since every game has a voiceless perosnalityless main character and often theyre the one doing most of the heroing with the supporting hero characters having surprisingly little proper screen time. Thats a big part of why i loved hau gladion and lillie in sun and moon! They felt more like a real friend group than any other ones before.

ANYWAY now im just going offtopic into more "i love lots of stuff about every pokemon game" so ill stop typing now

But just basically VILLAINS ARE GOOD COS THEYRE GOOD CHARACTERS and if those stories gavethe same character a good guy role then id still love them just as much, if not more. I dont specifically like villainy, its just that my definition of a good character is often considered a bad character by lazy writers, apparantly?

Also WHERE IS MY SUPPORTIVE GOOD GRAMPS CHARON GAME AND GAY AUNTIE URSULA GIVES YOU FASHION TIPS SMARTPHONE MMO

[jamesniall]

Hey I’m not the anon that u talked about but I follow u on twitter and wanna let u know that don’t worry!!!! That happened to me a few days ago too djdnxjsn. Are you posting today?

ahhh HI OMG thank u for understanding :’)

IT WAS SO FRUSTRATING bc i got it all written but there’s lil things to edit and words to change a bit but it was basically done and then the power went out and refused to come back for 7 hours :/

as soon as it came back i got to it but im sleeeeepy and i have a family thing tomorrow morning (basically today wow it’s 4 am) so i can’t post it until the afternoon :( BUT YES TODAY IT’LL BE POSTED FINALLY. NOTHING WILL STOP ME FROM POSTING IT TODAY.

if u want, and for the other super patient and lovely anon as well, here’s a lil preview of it; the first out of the 5 + 1 things of this fic!

(as i said, it still needs to be proof read again so if u find mistakes pls pretend u didnt, im gonna get to them tomorrow sdkfhds but yeah there u have 1,5k of this monster of a fic that took over 2 months of my life lmao what started as a lil hurt/comfort fic ended up in a 18k monster of developing relationship hurt/comfort and angst with a cHEESY ending wow)

Having the night shift at the E.R onFriday nights it’s always a chore. Harry always tries his best to change itwith one of his colleagues, even if he has to take Monday’s morning shift whereeveryone comes with the silliest symptoms to get some excuse to get out oftheir jobs for a couple days.

This time, however, Liam has a familything he can’t get out of and Harry has to cover the night shift.

It goes as he expected it.

Drunk college students with alcoholpoisoning are the most common gig of the night, followed by guys withconcussions and broken noses that can only be attributed to bar fights.

It’s around 10 pm when he’s making a roundthrough the new arrivals when he sees a guy sitting in the waiting room withwhat seems to be a scarf wrapped around his left arm and a guitar tightlyclutched in his right hand.

He looks downright miserable. Soaked tothe bone – though Harry doesn’t recall it raining when he started his shift –hair plastered to his forehead and a bruise in his right cheek that he can tellit’s gonna swell and hurt as fuck tomorrow morning.

He takes a look around the room andfigures he’s the most interesting case he can get out of the night.

“Hello there, I’m Doctor Styles. Did thenurse give you the triage paper?” He asks, looking down at the brown hairedguy, who startles at his voice.

“Oh, hi, yes, uh,” he searches around hispockets for a bit, hissing when he disturbs his homemade bandage, Harry doesn’tknow if he’s hiding a broken, burnt or cut arm, but he’s sure the scarf it’snot wrapped up properly for none of those situations.

He finally finds a yellow crumbled uppaper in the pocket of his jeans, “thought the red papers got attention first.”He says, looking up to Harry and handing him the paper.

“Yeah, Friday nights are usually full ofyellow ones, though.” Harry says, scanning the paper quickly and seeing Niall J. Horan, 25 year old male, reportedbar fight, probable broken wrist, no signs of concussion, vitals on order, pain8/10. “How’s your pain right now?”

“Out of ten? It’s been simmering between 8and 9 for the last hour,” Niall replies with a shrug. “Nurse told me x-rayswere necessary but that I’d have to leave my guitar outside,” he continues, “Irefused, because have you seen the people around this place? They’re all drunk.No way I’m leaving it out here only to find it broken, so if you can tell mewhat to do or what to take for the pain I’d appreciate it so I can go home.”

“You could have a broken wrist, judging bythe pain I’m pretty sure that’s the case, isn’t getting the x-ray moreimportant than a guitar?” Harry asks, an amused smile making his way through asNiall splutters and shakes his head.

“’Course it’s more important, she’s one ofa kind. Actually my arm might be broken because I fell out of the stage toprotect her.” He states. A stubborn frown taking over his face.

“Alright,” Harry nods, “You can leave itin my office while we do x-rays and get you proper treatment. That way both ofyou will be safe.”

“Really?” Niall asks, “Hey, thank youmate! I hope it’s not a bother.”

“None at all, just follow me and we’ll getit done quick enough.”

-

Half an hour later Niall’s sitting in astretcher as Harry wraps up his broken wrist properly. His guitar restingbeside him. “I cannot help but ask, what did you mean you fell out of a stageto save your guitar?”

“Oh,” he laughs, “well, you see, I play inthis bar on Friday nights, to help a bit with the bills, you know? Being ajust-graduated-nutritionist doesn’t give you much, so I was there, justchilling, getting ready to finish the set, when a bunch of assholes startedfighting, throwing punches and chairs and tables went flying. My guitar was inthe direct line of fire.” He says, pausing a bit to swallow harshly as Harrymoves his arm to check the blood flow is alright and the bandages are justtight enough. “So I try to yell at ‘em to be careful but just as I was about toreach the guitar and leave a guy was pushed over, I can only guess he was deaddrunk, because he didn’t even try to slow down the fall, and I could only seehis ass was for sure gonna land on my guitar, so I jumped head first to grab itand he fell on me, I fell on the corner of the stage, thus the bruising.”

“Is that why you told the nurse the reasonof all this was a bar fight?”

“Well, technically it all started with abar fight, but as I was about to explain it all she just went and rolled hiseyes and gave me a yellow paper.” Niall says, a sour look on his face, “realrude of her, you know.”

“Yeah, you’ll have to forgive her,” Harrysays with a small smile, “we don’t get much of anything other than bar fightson Friday nights.” He continues, handing Niall a sheet of paper with hisprescribed pain medication.

“Do I have to come for you to take a lookat it again? Like, remove the bandage or something?” Niall asks, looking a bitforlornly at the piece of paper.

“Oh, yeah but not here, exactly. You cancall this number,” he says, handing Niall a small card that just says Liam Payne and two phone numbers. “He’sthe best orthopedist you’ll ever find in this hospital. He’ll do an x-ray,check everything’s alright and in about 4 weeks you’ll be bandages free.” Hefinishes, smiling despite the fact that Niall looks kind of sad. Disappointedeven. “He really is the best, you’ve got nothing to be scared of, he’ll takegood care of you.”

“Not as good as you,” Niall mutters underhis breath as Harry turns his back on him to open the curtain that wasseparating them from the rest of the E.R.

“What was that?” Harry asks.

“Oh, nothing, just. Thinking out loudabout whether I should try to find a bus or just walk home.”

“I can call you a cab if you’d like.”Harry offers. Helping Niall gather his guitar, papers and card without losinganything.

“No, that’s alright. I left my jacket atthe bar so I have no change with me, just my very loyal Oyster card and twowell-functioning legs.”

“It’s really late, Niall, really. I canlend you some, it’s no trouble.” Harry says, searching in his pockets for hiswallet, “I’d be no good of me as a doctor if I fix you up only to let you walkhome at two in the morning. Cab is the safest option.”

“Also the most expensive,” Niall remarks,“we’re in an alright neighborhood and I live like half an hour from here, it’llbe alright.” Then, with a bit more of spark in his eyes, he says; “If you wantyou can give me your number and I can text you as soon as I get home.”

Harry seemed too busy looking into hiswallet to notice, though, “Here, just a couple of bucks. Just in case youdecide your house’s too far and you’re too tired or cold to keep walking.” Hesays, handing Niall a couple of folded bills. “Or in case you have nothing inyour Oyster card. Can’t never be too safe.”

He’s just finished talking when a beepcomes from his pocket. Eyes opening wide when he sees a red alert from hispager.

“Well, look at that. You can have a couplered cases on Friday nights too.” Harry says, shaking his head, “Have a niceevening. Don’t forget to pick up your meds tomorrow morning. What I just gaveyou we’ll be enough for the night but it might get really achey if you movearound a lot.” Harry says, walking fast towards the nurses’ station. “No guitarplaying, for at least a week, let you hand heal nicely. If there’s moreswelling, your fingers get really cold, dark or you can’t feel them or there’sany fever at all, please come back to the E.R immediately.” Harry says in arush as he checks the new triage papers. “Any questions?”

“Thank you.” Says Niall. “Really, you werethe nicest doctor I’ve ever met and I promise when I come back for that check-upI’ll hunt you down and pay you back.”

“No need,” Harry replies with a smile,“I’ve got to run. Have a safe trip home!”

And with that he leaves, back towards theentrance of the E.R where an ambulance is pulling in someone in a really bloodystretcher.

With a shudder, Niall turns to leave, notbefore looking back at Harry for the last time and saying to himself, “nexttime I’ll get his number.”

[horrible-monstrosity]

blunder leg low-priority episode 6 -now a vending machine is also a door because lol m'wacky dream lolgic lol so random and swerky but not random and qwerky enough to actually come up with something more interesting than doors being weird -the most obvious le hospital girl archetype with eyepatch ever known to mankind appears. I mean I guess it's good to get the archetype across quickly since she'll be fucking gone within a few minutes (remember in episode 1 when the egg girl and all her angst was actually developed while main was running around trying to save her? even ep 2 where the girl's archetype was spelled out like trying to get a dumb child to remember the alphabet was more than... well, basically nothing) but it just looks so odd, immediately. It doesn't even look like there're any other bandages on her. I dunno, it just seems kinda... lazy? oh are they going to do some thing with her eyepatch and main's eye colors? give me abreak The No-see-ums finally actually do something for the first time in... how am I only just starting on the 6th episode here? It feels like it's dragged on for so long... and yet nothing much has happened except a bunch of action scenes in shitty flashbacks and a bunch of the girls wandering around airing their backstories and talking about food. fuck this show

- these aren't no-see-ums! they're some other shit! oh on so the not-sees still haven't done jack shit then. we learn this after one of the noseeums trips, drops its knife and randomly decides to take off its mask so its face turns into a tennis ball with teeth. what. 'you've done too much to stand out in this worl' why the fuck does that matter? is acco refering to this one dream instance or the dream world at large? Is there ontological inertia between worlds that causes their battles there to have lasting effects? Nothing of the sort was established before this very nanosecond. 'what uh haturr' bitch I don't fucking know, the fuck's any of this shit? what's a seenoevil, what's the main monsters? actually what're the main monsters even called? are they just seenoevils but big? I don't remember if they've been named or anything at this point. but thanks to main just randomly fucking deciding to care about what the fuck a h8r is out of all this other shit, acco can tell us that they're spite created by the not-sees due to the grils' interference... FOR WHAT REASON? Main's barely touched a not-see in the last like two episodes and they're barely done jack shit in the flashbacks either, all the focus has been on the big monsters. oh yeah sure this show's just so super intelligent, you just have to duuuuurr make up shit consantly to fill in the shows own gaping plotholes, that takes some intellegence! also, the fuck you mean "you girls"? Are these four girls who all live in the same real-life area the only eggers in existence? No one else has a sudoku friend they'd like to save? "they don't have the guts to show their faces" ONE OF THEM LITERALLY TOOK OF ITS MASK WHICH PROMPTED YOU TO START SAYING THIS, ACCA-KUN. it's only a minute in and it's already so bad...... oh right the main monsters are called bosses like in muh video games. ok fine.

so anyway, the not-sees and the big bosses jot being after the main girls and just going after the egg-grils who they need to protect while the main girls were impervious "gods" was actually a really interesting dynamic and really made it feel like they were fighting someone else's personally hell. It's not like they lost tension, the girls could still get fucked up while fighting the things, but there was also the sliver of an idea that they could be cowards and just leave with no consequences to themselves, just the egg-girl getting brutalized. Like, you can do Your Part to stop bullying, you just have to muster up the courage/energy to caaaaare. So why not just... throw that out completely and make the not-sees attack the main girls directly. Because the writers ran out of ideas one femtosecond after they started writing this show and are now desperately casting around for ways to rachet up the tension

it's been so long since an actual battle has happened, and so little has been done with the battle setups, that acca has to remind main of the very basic fact that you can't clear the mission just by waiting for the bell. Remember the bell? I bet you'd forgotten about the bell, which hasn't been relevant in... many battles. -she'll regenerate in the egg-- ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME STOP GIVING EVERYONE GET OUT OF JAIL FREE CARDS YOU FUCKS. putting the girl back in the egg should be a lose condition for the night and require you to start over the next night, at the very least, not just "oh yeah just go back into the womb it'll heal all consequences" you dumb fucks. Sure, this explains the girl at the beginning acting like she's been through this before, but at what cost? we live in a society and these dumb girls doing dumb stuff have some kind of significant objective. but it's only the four of them in this small area. also we said the name of the show out loud for some reason. it;s only two minutes into the episode and already its fucked up so much fucking show

because things suddenly got hard, the girls just get handed a powerup. nobody has earned this. apparently pomanders are the same as eggs now for some reason aidoru gets really fucking pissy about brownie not wanting to trade with her, even though nobody knows whats in the not-eggs yet regardless of whether they trade or not. I don't care and neither should she

........what the fuck are these weird-ass looking lizard fucks. OH I GET IT, SPECIES HATCH OUT OF EGGS, SO THAT MEANS ITS CLEVER SOMEHOW. EVEN THOUGH YOU'D USUALLY THINK OF BIRDS BEFORE YOU'D THINK OF LIZARDS BEING ASSOCIATED WITH EGGS. EVEN THOUGH THEY'RE ALL TERRIBLY DESIGNED AND THERE'S NO POINT TO THEM EXISTING AT ALL. and then in the dream worl they're giant and... they eat haterz. and the problem is solved just like that. ok, good thing to know i don't have to care about that, either, goodbye mainy flatout asks egg girl why she fucking killed herself and egg girl explains... SHE CAN SEE DEAD PEOPLE. WHAT THE FUCK DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH EGG PEOPLE? "uguu no un wull beluve me" girl look at what the fuck's going on around you no one's going to believe any of this shit. I lost my suspension of disbelief in the war years ago. then the girls starts freaking out and crying about people having emotions at the hospital and shit, cool story bro can't relate. like i literally can't relate, you're tryng to write this poor girl who nobody could relate to so we feel sorry for her and relate to her, but there's really nothing to lash onto here besides "UHM CUTE GURL UM HAV FEULINGS BOOHOO" .... then it cuts in the middle of the battle to main talking to her teacher. I guess this is what she was upsetti about earlier, which means this random cut-away actually has a determinable place inthe timeline, but it's still really awkward and just shit. main drops some food back into her bowl when she hears the bombshell, but in the next shot her arms are completely at her sides, not over the bowl or even the table. cool putting aside how stupid of mom it was for her to drop this on her fucked-up kid- gendergirl is very specifically excited about becoming family with main, a girl she barely even knows bla bla this whole conversation's forced and stupid

I was going to praise the execution of having an invisible boss only the girl can see because it's made up of the girl seeing ghosts, but then main gets the pen knocked out of her hand and you know she's going to get handed the plushie or some shit and it's going to turn into a weapon that's better against the gost for NO REASON WHATSOEVER oh ok it's not the plushie it's the bracelet she conveniently throws directly in main's direction!!! thats even worse, good job show!!! and then for absolutely no reason main starts flashing over the bits of things her teacher had said and done, to force the appearance that what's happening now is in anyway shape or form connected to or bolstering that plotline... it really isn't. also why the fuck's this thing an elephant

what the hell, the prayer beads carried over from the dream?... and only after the mom notices them, main loses her shit and runs to school in the rain in soaking-wet clothes like she absolutely needed to go there and wasn't just wasting time in the tub seconds earlier. there was absolutely no reason for main to get over her shit and come back to school  absolutely no reason. but because she fixed her hair at the same ime intellectutards will eat it up and say it's deep. fuck off show

[wellsjahasghost]

Hi! Just wanted to let you know that I really enjoy your fics! I was even thinking about printing out Survivor's Guilt so I could put it on my bookshelf. Read it 2x so far and the beach scene made me cry every single time! And your Reincarnation AU: the accuracy of your research, amazing! How did you actually decide on which places and historical events you wanted to use? And were there some you really wanted to but stayed a draft? Do you want to give us a tease? Keep up the work! Thank you :)

………PRINTING IT OUT AND PUTTING IT ON YOUR BOOKSHELF?? Im speechless ??? NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS WOULD I HAVE EVER THOUGHT SOMEONE WOULD LIKE SOMETHING I WROTE /THAT MUCH/

before i truly start crying let me actually answer ur question perhaps… under the cut.

I knew HYSA was gonna start roughly 1000 AD and I initially wanted to try and get a lifetime from each century leading up to canon. I literally googled “world events 11th century” “world events 12th century” etc to find stuff I might be interested in LMAO… I made a list of events and chose from there. That’s how I came up with the Jerusalem plot, and the Khan Dynasty (honestly, as soon as I saw Genghis Khan had a half-brother named “Belgutei” I was sold). I also really wanted pirates!bellarke and witch trials!bellarke so I did some research into lesser known pirate locations and witch trials. And I also wanted a lifetime in the Philippines to honour Bellamy’s heritage so that’s where the orphanage one came in. Then there was SO MUCH STUFF from the 19th/20th century that I had trouble choosing. Did I want to do 1920s gangsters!Bellarke, Titanic!Bellarke, Victorian!Bellarke, WWII!Bellarke, or ? I eventually went with Cold War Bellarke because I had a brain wave to use the Berlin Wall as a device to keep them apart, lol.

BUT WAIT. Let me tell you about this ONE life that I actually spent time developing that I never got to put in. YUKON GOLD RUSH BELLARKE: Bellamy is a prospector looking for Gold, stops for supplies in the shop that Clarke works in. They decide to get married to take advantage of a loophole in the law which I found on Wikipedia aka the most reliable source to exist:

Under Canadian law, miners first had to get a license, either when they arrived at Dawson or en route from Victoria in Canada.[161] They could then prospect for gold and, when they had found a suitable location, lay claim to mining rights over it.[162] To stake a claim, a prospector would drive stakes into the ground a measured distance apart and then return to Dawson to register the claim for $15 ($410).[162] This normally had to be done within three days, and by 1897 only one claim per person at a time was allowed in a district, although married couples could exploit a loophole that allowed the wife to register a claim in her own name, doubling their amount of land.

ANYWAY, you can see how this lifetime was gonna go. Basically a fake marriage AU. I ended up not doing it because the emotional storyline felt too similar to other lifetimes that ended up in the fic, but I still really love the plot bunny. 

Also…. in my earliest idea of this fic, Bellarke never remember each other UNTIL the canon lifetime… and there is no end to their reincarnation; they simply find each other again in the post-canon life. Obviously, this isn’t what happened in the final fic, but I actually did write these scenes before I decided to change it, so since you asked for a tease….

Many years— decades— pass.

It turns out if earth doesn’t kill them, their bodies do. Cancer should be expected, really, after all they are living on a radiation soaked planet, and their bodies are only barely equipped to metabolize it all. It only makes sense that it would all slow down at some point, and Earth would catch up with them in the end.

(But they ran as fast as they could until then.)

Now Clarke is nearing her time, unable to move from her bed, and Bellamy is afraid. He’s got the cancer too, but she’s worse.

She’s going to die soon, and he’s terrified.

He voices this, and Clarke reaches up with one near-emaciated hand to tug at one of his curls. He can see just enough of it in his vision to see the silver in it. “At least we got to grow old,” she tells him, voice raspier than usual. “Not everyone can say that.”

They’re not that old, although they look it, he supposes. Clarke’s got more lines around her eyes, around her mouth in laugh lines. Some of them are from age. Some from illness. Either way, she’s his best friend, and so she’s beautiful.

He takes her hand, interlacing their fingers. “I’m gonna miss you.”

“Not for long,” she says lightly, and he huffs a laugh.

“You think?” He’s always argued that their remembrance of their past lives broke the curse, that this life is the last one for them.

But she’s always argued different. “I know,” she says, fervently.

She exclaims it so passionately, looking so earnestly into his eyes, that he feels he has no choice to believe it. It makes his heart hurt less, at least. He leans down to press a kiss to her forehead, but she makes a noise, tilting her head up. He hesitates, because he doesn’t want to kiss her lips, waste what little energy she has left, but she’s looking at him with a kind of fierce desperation— desperation for him— that he feels he has no choice but to concede.

When their lips touch, she surges up with surprising strength to kiss him properly.

He gets lost in it a moment too long and she falls back into the pillows with a tired huff. He instantly feels guilty, but there’s a brightness to her eyes from the kiss, and he would never wish that wasn’t there.

“Kiss me as soon as you see me in the next life,” he tells her, trying to keep his tears at bay with a joke. “So we don’t waste any time.”

Clarke smiles a little painfully and says, “It was  never a waste of time.”

“I know,” he replies softly. She’s not done, continuing earnestly.

“Just getting to know you before any of this— before remembering any of the lives we’ve lived before— was one of the happiest parts of my life.”

He knows that. “Is,” he corrects. “Is one of the happiest parts of our life.”

She doesn’t answer. The light is fading from her eyes now; the blue, roaring oceans of her irises fade into blue paint dry on a canvas, nothing compared to the real thing. This is it, he thinks, and an anxious feeling rises in his chest. He’s just— he’s not ready. He’s not ready to live his life without her, however brief it might be.

He squeezes her hand. “May we meet again,” he manages to say through his tears.

He doesn’t expect her to say anything more, but she does, a cracked whisper using up the last air in her lungs— and her mouth turning up in something of a smile at the end.

“We will.”

YEAR 2300

She sees him for the first time in the Skybus terminal.

He’s on the other side of it, and yet he catches her eye immediately. Dark haired, wearing a blue jacket and black jeans with boots the other side of the terminal he turns around suddenly, as if sensing her watching. She sits up straighter without meaning to. He stops in his tracks.

Their gazes lock, and then collide.

His eyes are dark brown, so dark in the low light of the cloudy day that she really shouldn’t know their colour. But inexplicably, she is hit with a strong sense of deja vu.

And with that thought, comes a landslide of others.

Snippets of things, really— lips on her lips, warm and comforting, hands touching her skin, a deliriously giddy feeling taking flight and then settling back low and warm in her chest over and over and over again, and fire. So much fire.

But even through the fire, she hears his voice. Gravelly, pitched low. But it’s there. It makes something stir restlessly in her soul in yearning. In familiarity. Some deep part of her just knows that voice is his— belonging to the dark-haired man in front of her.

All this happens in the space of a single breath, and when she exhales, so does he. They stare at each other for another second, and she’d almost think that he’s sorting through the same questions in his head.

Then, unexpectedly: He tips his head and smiles at her.

It’s a small and slow one and maybe even a little shy. And yet, it bedazzles her, strikes her speechless. She’s buoyed by it, even though maybe he’s not feeling the same thing— maybe they’ve just been staring at each other too long to be socially acceptable so he felt like he had to. But that doesn’t stop her from giving him a very overeager sort of wave from across the terminal.

His smile doesn’t fade, and she finds her own lips stretching into one as well. I know him, her heart sings. And he’s home.

He comes closer, and he’s heading for the same gate, she realizes with a start, that her flight is on. “Hi,” she says to him.

A pause. He blinks at the sound of her voice. Then:

“Hi, Clarke,” he says.

Her heart rattles. The way he says her name is extraordinary— his deep voice softens like butter around it, and she’s electrified. “How’d— how’d you know my name?” she asks.

He nods over to her boarding pass that she’s clutching onto. Looking down, she realizes that her name is boldly printed there in plain sight. “Oh,” she laughs a little, ducking her head at her own foolishness. But it’s funny, because— she could’ve sworn he just knew it.

His small smile widens almost imperceptibly. “I’m Bellamy,” he tells her, and she nods because that sounds about right.

“Bellamy,” she repeats, tasting the word on her tongue. It’s sweet.

He nods and hitches his bag higher onto his shoulder. “Nice to meet you.” It’s the polite thing to say, but it feels sincere somehow. There’s a beat of silence, and then, almost as if struggling with it, he slowly slides his gaze away from her and walks away, towards the departure gate.

She watches him stroll away, rooted to the bench yet simultaneously feeling like an invisible rope is tugging her towards him. She is seized with a strange desire to go after this stranger and only barely manages to fight it back. She doesn’t know him, she tells herself. At least, not yet. She can’t just run after him right now. She’ll probably see him on the plane; and if not, she’ll find him in Arrivals.

Decided, Clarke settles back into her chair, but keeps her eyes on the man until he disappears from sight into the throng of people. Instantly, she feels that urge swell up again but she squashes it. She’ll find him later. There’s no need to rush, after all. 

They’ve got all the time in the world.

You’ll recognize some of those lines because I recycled them into the actual fic haha. I do that a lot. The last bit, with them in the Sky terminal, was me filling a prompt that came into my inbox– that prompt is actually what inspired me to write this entire fic, and it didn’t even make it into the fic ! lmao. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed a little insight into my writing process, and thank you for your question! I’m super flattered that you were interested in knowing. :’)

[rrapmonstur-blog]

V TIME Summary/smutty smut and fluff. Tae Tae wants to be seen as a man but you and the boys only see him as a cute goofy little brother –LET’S go–

“AHHHHHHHHHH puppy puppy puppy” You squeal with joy as you begin to slap Taes arm trying to get him to notice the puppy that is inside a women’s purse. “Y/N what is- oh my God puppy!!” He exclaims just now noticing the puppy. He laughs giving off a good smile before running over to her “can we please pet your puppy” not being able to resist his boyish charm she agrees very quickly. You run over as she takes the small fuzzy dog out of her purse. “IS it a pomeranian puppy?” You ask almost positive. “Yes it is dear” You smile at Taehyung and pet the puppy’s soft head “it’s so cute and small. Just like you” you notice Taes eyebrow twitch not thinking anything of it.

“So dear is this your little brother? He’s so cute” the women asks happily. Taehyung replies quicker than you could open your mouth “no ma'am I am actually 21” he ends with a stiff chuckle. You laugh “He might as well be with how cute and weird he is.” Taes back stiffens at this remark but keeps petting the small puppy. The lady states she has to go feed the puppy and you guys thank her nicely before turning around and walking off. You notice Tae is straight faced and walking with a stiff back “what’s wrong” You ask sweetly bumping his hips with yours. He looks at you “stay right here real quick” he says bluntly before walking off and pulling out his cellphone to make a call. You watch his form face back and forth only hearing a snippet of the conversation “-before I tell everyone about the loads of por-” he stops his sentence before putting his phone back into his pocket.

You walk back into the house in silence noting the unusual silence due to the fact someone is almost always home between him and the boys. He curtly replies with “they went out” before shutting the door behind you in a loud slam and locking it. You walk over to the couch and flop down onto it kicking your legs out last. In a jokingly even more high pitched voice you say in a singsong voice “Taeeeee. Can I have some soda or something pleaseeee” you hear him stomp into the kitchen opening up the fridge and a familiar cracking sound of a soda being popped open. You hold out your hands behind you waiting to feel the cold beverage enter your outstretched hands. You impatiently keep wiggling your fingers before feeling a warm stiff body enter your reach instead of a cold drink.

Your head gets forced back before feeling a warm air of lips meet yours and a cool liquid pour into your mouth. You swallow and shout “W-what the heck Tae! Why didn’t you just give me the soda.” Wiping off your lips your heart racing in your chest by the way you just received a drink. “Stop calling me a boy or your little brother y/n” You hear him growl from behind you. “Whyy I can’t help it that you’re so cccuuuttteee and full of boyish charm” You say softly turning your head back to look at him with an innocent smile on your face. His eyes darken as he leans his face closer to yours once more his lips only inches away from yours. You lick your lips at the sight of Taes exposed collorbone and being able to see down the chest of his shirt since he is leaning down causing the neck to lean open. You take in how his body isn’t flat or vacant of muscle. Your eyes slide down his chest and stomach taking in the lean yet not totally defined muscles. You clear your throat as if to try and interrupt your own indecent thoughts that were slowly making their way into your head after noticing Taehyung didn’t have all that much of a boyish frame as you thought. He leaned forward just enough that you could now feel his hot breath against your lips taking a small clump of hair in his hands tilting your head back more exposing the skin on the sides of your neck.

** leggo this smutty half takes a bit to develop but it sure won’t leave your underwear dry. It’s slow to form but in a good way**

You sit there trying to calculate in your mind the series of events portraying right in front of you. You are stunned by the fact cute goofy little Taehyung is strangely turning you on with this strange new attitude. “Haha. Ok jokes over. It’s not funny anymore” You attempt to cry out but instead it’s coming out more like a shaky moan your voice letting out your true feelings. “We’re not even close to done” you watch Taehyungs lips as he speaks words that send shivers down your spine your legs shift to accommodate the now forming wetness.

More and more of your body noticing he isn’t a child. He is definitely a man behind that childish face and personality. Your eyes catching every sharp line of his features, your mouth watering at the secretly exposed skin, your nose catching his soft yet subtly manly body wash infiltrating your nostrils, your fingers aching your tangle themselves in his soft hair that’s tickling your eyelids, you body most of all noticing this new found manhood of Taehyung, body arching to try and get closer the man behind the couch from you, your core dampening more by the second. Your body reacting on his complete own against all these new senses causes a small airy moan escapes your lips.

“Fuck” You breath put in a voice almost so low you can’t hear it. “What was that baby girl” you hear Taehyung sneer. “I’m not your baby girl” you bark back to him almost instantly regaining some control over your body. Tae turns his head and smirks at you in a deliciously handsome matter with strands of hair falling across his face as highlighting some of his non childish features. He keeps his hand balled up in your hair as he makes his way in front of you planing a small kiss on your neck before letting go of your hair. “Don’t move” he commands. You almost listen to his command but manage to choke out a snide remark “I don’t listen to little boys.” You hear a deep him coming from the bottom of his throat. He squats down in front of you kissing your inner thigh closest to your core. “I’m not a boy baby girl. I can show you that much and you will see me in a whole new light” he speaks smoothly against your thigh causing a shiver to run down your spine. He swiftly removes your pants so you are sitting in front of him with your legs wise open in nothing but your shirt and now soaked panties. “If i am such a child y/n, then why are you so wet” he cooes before leaving a trail of kisses up your thighs just stopping before your heat. Your mouth stays slightly open but no words will come out. Tae leans his head forward breathing directly onto you causing your head to fall back. He licks up your clothed slit before grabbing you by your waist and switching spots with you on the couch. You look up at him surprised but extremely aroused able to feel your wet center against your leg.

You notice the hard member inside his jeans you slowly inzip them and pull down his boxers to expose his hard throbbing manhood. You click your lips and swallow the pool of saliva that has made its way into your throat. You lick just the tip of beading precum and you look up to see his eyes darkened with lust staring down at you with his bottom lip firmly between his teeth. A plan crosses your mind to try and tease him. You slowly lick up the shaft before curling your lips around the tip. You move your head down slowly and deeply making sure the tip always reaches the back of your throat. On your way up from his member you’re massage the tip with your tongue causing a deep growl to escape his lips as he bucks his hips up managing to slide down your throat a little. A new Loud moan rips it’s way up through him as he clenches onto your hair before fucking your throat always making sure to come up and give you time to breathe. He continues at his quick pace always going down into your throat before a warm liquid slides inside of you. He slides out of your mouth and you clean up the cum that didn’t make it with your tongue delighted by this wonderful taste. He lifts you up off the floor into a deep kiss removing your panties and setting you on his lap you feel yourself dripping onto his still hard member. “Y/N why are you so wet. I’m just a little brother to you remember” he hums into your ear. He bucks his hips gently against your womenhood the tip sliding into your wet core a harmony of a hum escaping both of you. He pulls out as you hiss for more he rubs himself between your wet legs content but how wet your are. He thrusts always making sure to hit your sensitive bud. You cry out for more but he leaves you empty “take fuck me” you cry out. He just chuckles and shakes his he’d ignoring your requests “im a child we don’t listen babygirl” You begin him to fill you up as you feel the tip continuously rub against your bud causing a wave of pleasure to rock through you. He inserts one finger and you feel yourself start to lead down his hand he pumps before adding another digit you grind against his hand before his adds one final digit. You rock your hips against his pumps as he attaches his lips to your neck sucking softly. You ride until you feel your core begin to tighten. He removes his fingers and you get left empty and you hear him purr into your ears “say I’m a man y/n. And I’ll finish what I started” You nod in agreement in a breathless voice you whisper “you’re a man. I’m sorry your not a child definitely not. Just please fuck me Tae” You feel his digits enter your again as your core tightens and your eyes start to flutter he pulls them out once more replacing them with something much harder and longer.

One deep powerful thrust enters you causing you’re already pent up climax to spill out over him. You ride out your pleasure as your name comes out of Taes mouth. He begins to trust once more making sure to keep his deep and hard pace going you don’t recover from your last orgasm as you feel a new one budding up inside your stomach. You feel your walls tighten around his member and you hear him practically sing your name. He quickens his pace feeling his own climax coming. You sit there enjoying the feeling when he gives one final deep hard thrust causing you to fall over the edge his climax following right behind. You feel his juices mix with yours as he pulls out and kisses your cheek. You get up to walk off and clean yourself up but you utterly fail legs giving out from beneath you

“Told you I’m not a child” he smiles sweetly while covered in a thick layer of sweat. You laugh breathlessly “Seriously thats all you gotta say Taetae. You fuck me to the point I can’t wall right., and all you can say is your not a child. He picks you up and carries you to the bathroom and starts a bath. "Get in. I’ll be right back” you climb into the warm water when Tae comes through the door with a cup of what looked like tea. He smiles and passes you the cup taking a big gulp of the warm beverage. He sits down next to the bathtub and rubs your shoulders “A real man should take care of his girl” you raise your eyebrow In surprise “oh so I’m your girl now” You laugh out a pained look shooting though his eyes. “You don’t want to be?” He sys with hurt filling his voice. You look at his hurt sad face thinking he looked almost like a puppy. “I mean I guessssss” you say with a smile spreading wide across your cheeks. He smiles , kisses you happily and starts plays with your hair as he begins to hum softly in your ear.

[sealnarcisa]

Kyle Woodward’s final blog post from Southern Africa. My visa issue finally got resolved, albeit with quite a lot of effort and frustration on my part. Unfortunately they couldn't swap my business visa for a tourist visa while in the country and the only way to fix it was to leave the country and come back in. Luckily Zimbabwe is just a 10 minutes drive to the border. It also just happens that the Zambia/Zimbabwe border is right at Victoria Falls. The border bridge is a tourist attraction, where people zip-line across the gorge and bungee jump off the bridge. Walking across the bridge with Victoria Falls as a backdrop was an unexpexted and surreal moment, and i made sure to take my time walking across both ways. It was a much needed stress reliever. The Falls are so close to you as you walk toward the Zimbabwe border post that the mist creates a perpetual light rain. Having not seen or felt rain in 2 months I was very confused at first. Since i got my necessary tasks done on Friday, I decided to go see the Falls properly all day on Saturday. I was going to be a tourist for a day, so exciting! On Saturday I had a relaxing morning and got a shuttle to the Victoria Falls Park entrance. I met another friend from the same hostel, and we hiked all the trails together. The Knife's Edge trail leads you out on a narrow peice of land thats been carved away by the Falls over time. It's the closest you can get to the Falls, and when you get out onto the edge you are completely soaked in a matter of seconds. Its like walking into a category 1 hurricane: the force of the water falling into the gorge creates a powerful uplift of air that shoots the trailing mist straight back to the top of the gorge, creating a barrage of wind and rain. There is no escape, and we willingly walked out to meet it in our bare feet and cheap ponchos. It is one of the best 20 bucks ive ever spent, and somehow my passport didn't even get wet. On our way down a separate trail to the bottom of the gorge, we were ambushed by a massive male baboon. We learned quite quickly that its not wise to carry food or drinks out in the open in this park because of these guys. We dropped our bottles of soda in order to avoid being mauled. It was actually terrifying in the moment but we laughed about it later. It was pretty funny watching this baboon open our soda bottles, dump out a ton of orange Fanta and sit there slurping it off the ground. On Sunday I went to the bus station at noon to catch my bus back to Sesheke, only to find out that the 12:00 bus i had purchased a seat on had left at 10:30 just because it got there early. It was another lesson in how things work out here: Disorder and unreliable public services create enough inevitable inconveniences in day to day life that society has adapted in order to provide quick and easy solutions. One of the bus company managers immediately took my money back from the attendant and drove me in his own car to the outskirts of town where a bunch of vans wait all day to give rides at the same or cheaper rate. He paid the van driver my bus money, I hopped in, and within a half hour we were on the way to Sesheke. We even got there right around the same time my bus would have. I met up with Michael and one of our enumerators in the afternoon and we drove back up to Sioma District for the night. The next day we drove the 1.5 hour journey into the bush to Makande. The drive seems to take forever as we creep along through a narrow sandy track, dodging trees and trying not to get stuck. Even with a 4wd truck it's not easy to get to by any means, yet people live here the same way as those right on the tar road in Lusu, Kaale, and Kalobolelwa. It's a remarkable thing seeing these communities operate with little to no outside aid. The idea that one can create and maintain their entire livelihood from the surrounding natural resources is so foreign to me, as I presume it is for many other 'Westerners'. Your health (ability to perform manual labor) and work ethic (determination to do so) hold greatest weight in village life. Lin, Michael, and I split our enumerators into teams of 2 for the first day of household surveys, then the second day Lin and I finished the rest of the surveys and did reference samples while Michael worked on resource area mapping. It went by so quick that I found myself scrambling on the last day to take a few pictures to remember this experience by. My pictures are mediocre at best, but Im pretty sure I won't ever forget this. Our last night camping in Makande was so fun. We ended the month of work talking, joking, singing, and dancing around our campfire, trading ideas, experiences, and standing on common ground. We also chased this weird goat around that kept walking into our camp. It was the funniest thing ever. No matter how far we chased it away from our camp, it would eventually wander back and stand there just staring at us. If they make another Disney movie based in Africa (shout out Lion King), this goat needs to be the typecast dumb animal comic relief character. The long weekend was spent back in our home sweet home, Sesheke. Michael needed to finish resource area mapping in Lusu, and Lin and i decided to collect more reference samples in Kalobolelwa, so we decided to set up at our usual campground in town. We took one of our enumerators along who wants to study environmental science, and he absorbed all the vegetation and GPS stuff like a sponge. It was a really fun day just walking around, seeing different landscapes, and talking about plants. Since we were officially done with the Zambia field season by the end of that day, we got to be lazy the next day in Sesheke. We walked around the market, bought some food and gifts, learned how to play Zambian rules Checkers, and had a good dinner in town. This past Sunday turned out to be a really special day, and may turn out to be one of the most important for future research pursuits in Zambia. Henry from DNPW allowed us to come along with him into Sioma-Ngwezi NP, where they are working on re-introducing wildlife the next 4 years. They created a fenced-in 100 hectare enclosure for the animals which they use to acclimate them before releasing them into the park. They had about 180 impala and 32 buffalo that they transported there a few weeks ago, and we got to come along on their weekly check up. We got to stand in their pickup truck bed as we patrolled inside the fence perimeter, trying to spot and count all the buffalo and impala. Michael and I came up with another research idea pretty organically as we chatted about the wildlife re-introduction process and the ways they currently monitor wildlife numbers in the park. The folks at DNPW and WWF sound quite keen to begin some research collaboration this coming year with us, and I'm glad Michael and I prioritized time to build those relationships. On Monday we said goodbye to Lin as she headed back to Botswana, then Michael and I drove to Livingstone. Having been in Livingstone last weekend, I already knew what it was like, so it was really great seeing Michael be totally blown away by all the city people, restaurants, shops, and 2 story buildings. We had fun wandering around, getting lost, and eating a ton of really good food. We have a special place in our hearts for Sesheke, but it is by no means a city. The fact that Sesheke ever felt like a city to us speaks to how much time we have spent in remote areas of rural Zambia. We felt like the Zambian village children this time, amazed to see so many white people in one place. I'm writing this on my flight back home and reflecting on all of the new and unique experiences I've had these past two months: flying drones in the Chobe river floodplain in Botswana, digging ourselves out of the sand more times than i can count, being immersed in village life and the language, playing sports with village children in Kapau and Makande, crossing international borders on my own, learning to drive stick in Zambia, and many others. They've all offered an opportunity to learn, challenge my own paradigms, and grow into a more worldly and introspective person. Southern Africa has given me so much, and I am eager to give back in any way an academic researcher can. I am so grateful to Dr. Pricope and all of the KAZAVA collaborators for supporting me and allowing me into their network. Michael gets a special shout out; we started out as two unacquainted grad students working on the same project, but by experiencing all the challenges and joys of a productive field season, we became both an unstoppable duo and great friends. I'm excited to pursue some of the research ideas we have developed in Zambia together. Lastly, for anyone who has not yet stepped foot on the African continent, this is my 5 star recommendation. It turns out Africa is huge and offers so much to the new traveller: the diverse cultures, the wildlife, and spectacular landscapes. I've only seen small parts of 3 countries, but I'm obsessed now. Africa will be high on my list for travelling the rest of my life, and I will do everything I can to get family and friends to experience it as well. Kyle Woodward.

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5 Clear Cut Signs That It’s Time For New Friends

You’re reading 5 Clear Cut Signs That It’s Time For New Friends, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’re enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

“If you’re the smartest person in your group, then you need a new group” ~ Les Brown

Have you ever spent a weekend with friends only to leave with that deep empty feeling inside? Where you were once best of buddies, now it seems like you’re strangers. Are you at the butt end of every joke, prank, and sarcastic comment? It’s not personal (even it if feels like it), you’ve simply changed and grown apart.

Changes

One of the problems is that as humans we don’t like change. Change challenges what we know and causes us to become nervous and defensive. So when you appear different to your group, it suddenly feels like you’re on your own walking the plank. Mutiny!

Find a new circle

Instead of clinging on reasoning that you’ve known each other since you were kids, or that you all went to college together, it’s time to bite the bullet and find a new ship. We all have a deep longing for embrace and acceptance. We want to be liked. But when the pack turns on you, you need to turn your back on the pack. Sticking with old friends who don’t care for you like they once did, is a sure fire way to fall into depression, desperate for a connection that is long lost. Instead of trying to save a sinking ship, it’s time to step out of your comfort zone and explore new avenues and relationships. Look for these 5 telltale signs to see if it’s time you found a new group of friends.

1. You do all the legwork

Do you organize everything? Are you regularly inventing original and diverse ways to spend time? When someone needs to take the lead, are you always the one to step up? Are you continuously planning everything, organizing every trip or night out? If you are then it’s time for balance.

There is no I in Team

I cannot recall how many times I have arranged kick ass trips, events, and parties only for my friends to turn up, enjoy the pie, and then go home leaving me to clean up the mess. Organization is a team effort. If you always do the heavy lifting, you’ll be left with a heavy heart that feels bitter and under appreciated. If your friends are not taking the initiative to participate then it’s time to look for people who will.

Cut out the crap

A lion does not bother himself with sheep! When there are people in your circle who aren’t pulling their weight, cut them loose and move on. It sounds harsh but your head and your heart will thank you for it.

2. They keep letting you down

Have you ever built up a sweat in a bid to arrive on time only to watch a friend casually waltz down the road without a care in the world? Frustrating isn’t it? You’ve broken the 4-minute mile while your buddy thinks being late like Axel Rose is cool. This isn’t a Paris Hilton party!

What time is it Mr Wolf?

In Colombia, I made friends with a girl who kept turning up late to a workshop. The girl didn’t think twice about being late every day until I asked her if she could arrive at the time scheduled instead of 20 minutes later. Noticing that she was disturbing the group she promised that she would be on time and cleverly said: “Don’t worry, I’ll be here tomorrow on English time.” To which I replied: “It’s not English time, it’s the TIME!” Do you have any friends like this? People who think time stops for them?

The art of responding

Friends who ignore emails, or “forget” to return phone calls are making a strong statement. Simply put, they don’t care enough about you to be reliable. You hear excuse after excuse as you wait around like a lemon as if you don’t have better things to do. Everyone is late occasionally. We all forget to reply once in awhile. But if you are the kind of person who goes the extra mile for your friends while that effort goes under the radar, then it’s time to look for people who actually value and respect you. No time to hit reply, time to say goodbye!

3. You have different interests

At University I naturally became friends with the guys I shared dorms with. One of their big interests was soccer. I wasn’t the biggest soccer fan but wanted to fit in. Several years, and hundreds of hours later, I realized that I was spending time doing something that wasn’t really me. Sound familiar?

Are you really having fun?

The final straw came when we went on a month long road trip around Europe following the England soccer team as they played in the European Finals. Although the trip was fun, I came back empty. Realizing that we shared completely different interests was a pivotal moment. There was nothing wrong with their interests, each to their own, but they weren’t mine.

Find a balance

If we all liked the same things life would be pretty mundane. Sometimes you need to recognize and accept that your interests are wildly different from your friends. When you notice that your friends love to stay in playing video games, and you love going out dancing, instead of forcing yourself to do the things you don’t enjoy, throw in the towel. It’s not personal, there’s nothing wrong with videos games, but if their idea of fun is closing the curtains and playing Battlefield, whereas you get your rocks off by soaking up the sun, then it’s time to wave the white flag. That being said, having different hobbies is fine. We aren’t clones, so look for balance. Make your relationships a two-way thing.

4. It’s always about them

Recently I came back from a 2-year traveling odyssey around Intercontinental America. As you can imagine, it was the trip of a lifetime. You might think that when I returned home, my friends would be desperate to know about the adventure. Some were super interested, others, well, they just wanted to talk about their day at work. Don’t get me wrong, I’m interested in what they’ve been up to, but what about their interest in what I’ve been up to?

Deflated

How much interest your friends have in your life is a telling sign about how much they actually care about you. Have you ever been bursting with excitement over a new job, car, or partner, desperate to celebrate the joy only for it to get brushed under the carpet? Don’t take it to heart, it’s simply that your friends aren’t so invested in you. They are invested in themselves!

All take and no give

In ‘How To Win Friends And Influence People’ author Dale Carnegie explains that if you want to make someone feel good, ask questions about ‘their’ life. Let’s say you are at a BBQ and you are talking to a stranger. Eventually, you notice that unless you ask a question, they stare into oblivion. They have nothing to say unless you do the probing. It wouldn’t be long before you moved on, right? We need to adopt this approach with our friends and consider finding ones who offer a bit of give as well as take. You’ll feel a happier and stronger connection if you spend time with people who show an interest in your life.

5. They don’t support you

A few years ago I moved to London and hooked up with a new girl. I thought she was awesome and was keen for my friends to meet her. Instead of welcoming her into the group, they showed little support or desire to make a connection. It’s possible that they felt threatened, but if they really cared they would have welcomed her with open arms. Plenty of other pals have formed a great friendship with my girlfriend, but for others, they weren’t open to the new relationship.

Don’t be blue about new

Have any of your friends rejected something or someone new you’ve brought to the table? Maybe you bought a summer dress and instead of compliments, you received sniggers. Or maybe you suggested trying a new restaurant only for it to fall on deaf ears. Good friends are willing to try new things and will support you with new ventures. If you come out and tell your friends that you’re gay, they might be surprised, but they’ll stick by you. Or they’ll show their true colors!

Yes man

Be careful though, don’t make the mistake of wanting your friends to be “Yes” people. True friends won’t be afraid to disagree with you, but they’ll do it in a thoughtful way with only your best interests at heart. When you have a new idea, make a big change, or do something out of the ordinary, look for friends who have your back, not ones who laugh behind it.

Let them go

Letting go of your friends can be a painful yet often necessary process. If you want to grow, expand, and develop meaningful relationships, sometimes you need to make space and jump out of your comfort zone. Make a decision to connect with like-minded people who support your goals and participate in your interests. You won’t find too many like-minded individuals at a rave if crowded places and loud noises make you anxious. The trick is to get out there and do the things you love by surrounding yourself with people who are already doing it. Join a meetup or local course filled with people doing the things that interest you.

You’re different and it’s OK

Remember, it’s not about cutting everyone out of your life. It’s not about getting angry and falling out with your old friends. Accept that you have different desires and dreams. If it seems like you are aliens, take another path. You aren’t better or worse, you’re just different.

One in a million

Finally, acknowledge the precious few friends who support, contribute, and stick by you. Work on developing the friendship and be open and honest with each other. Friends come and go through life, but the ones worth keeping are like looking for glass needles in a haystack – you’ll need to put in some real effort to find them.

The payoff will be a lifetime of laughter, adventure, and support with true friends who love you.

You’ve read 5 Clear Cut Signs That It’s Time For New Friends, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you’ve enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.

Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement