#but im connected to writer green

[otherworldly-whump]

Whumpee being forced by whumper to hit after hit on a THC vape all night before their allowed any food for the evening. Just watched amused by whumper as they get more and more out of it. By the time whumpe us handed food, its much less likely they'll refuse to eat, and their so out of it that its easy for whumper to push them around or force them to cuddle.

[bijoumikhawal]

I've gotten tired of making a post like this every few months so let's just fire a few of these off, and feel free to add on! Tropes you should at minimum reconsider using when you write or talk about Julian Bashir:

Mentions of "harem" pants, "Arabian nights" aesthetics, etc. These are improper terminology (that feeds into racist ideas) for real things, and when using that terminology those things are often being misrepresented. For my part, if you would actually like to know about the material culture of the Middle East and North Africa, I'm a "hobby" researcher of that very topic and will readily answer asks about it- with the caveat that I mostly know about Egypt, and I'm not the best person to ask about Sudanese specific culture even though I know a little, and I don't know much about Indian or Pakistani fashion (mentioning because these seem to be the most common cultures brought up around Julian).

comparisons to monkeys, apes, the word "simian". This should be obvious but it happens a fair amount, and it's almost comedic given a common trope is to comment on how much Garak hates being compared to a lizard.

This is separate but the way some people use mammalian tips from writing xenofic and trying to understand how an alien would think and categorize things into something that feels very exoticifying. It's not a "full stop, do not do this" but it is something I've noticed

Jokes about how undesirable Julian is. He's the exception that proves the rule about fandom's obsession with white twinks and a rare example of a brown nerd who isn't pinned into the "Couldn't sleep with a woman if they were the last two people on earth" box. I'm not saying we can't make fun of how he flirts just- Stay clear of Raj BBT territory

Conversely: my most hated garashir trope is when the author makes Julian's libido a problem by making him inconsiderate, cruel, and outright manipulative in service of his dick, and the writing often makes it clear they're connecting this to his masculinity. Julian does do some really stupid shit when it comes to his relationships, but this particular way of trying to incorporate this into writing him is just OOC, and you need to not confuse writing Julian's canonical robust and healthy sex life with negative stereotypes about lecherous Black and brown men. There's fics that pull off Julian being a bit of a dick or manipulative well- such as Salt the Earth or the ageswap series (at least where I last left off on it).

making his eyes green or blue. I have the same eye color as Siddig, more or less, and while it's technically hazel (or olive, as some people call it) most people think it's brown and most lighting makes it look brown. If you look at screencaps of Julian, you'll notice it also most of the time, looks brown. This sounds minor if you haven't experienced it, but it has a real and very negative impact on people's self image.

Older one but to be clear: if you're writing Julian as explicitly Muslim, find and replacing "god" with "allah" in English text is not how Muslims (or Arabic speakers in general) use the word? It is really funny to read, but please...

Over focusing on Julian as British. There's a long, LONG conversation that could be had about the dynamics of assimilation and how European racism (ime) very specifically views it as progressive to strip people of their culture and thinks they're causing the problem if they don't go along with it that would need its own post and which I've had with white fans before and feel exhausted thinking about- but to put it simply, there is no such thing as "just British", even for white Englishmen.

Yes the inverse is also wrong but I really haven't read a fic newer than 2014 guilty of that lmao and I think some of the more recent complaints about it are overblown, given I've read only a few fics recently published that delve into Julian as a Brown/African Person and I enjoyed them

I would personally appreciate it if fic writers were a little more balanced about cultural discussions honestly. If you write a lot about Cardassian culture, it'd be nice if Julian’s background was discussed. I won't say that kind of research is easy (again, I do this as a "hobby" that's very important to me, it's actually really annoying and difficult sometimes), but it is possible. I recently talked about how not doing this kind of mentally slots Julian into a "white guy" role.

This is not a matter of me policing your "artistic expression". I have no control over what you do. I would just like for fandom, a hobby I do for fun, to be a place where people stop being racist in a way that directly impacts me.

[kaetastic]

IF ONLY YOU KNEW

pairing: Regulus Black x Slytherin!F!Reader

summary: She was born green. Well, not literally, but the bond between two Slytherins was like no other. Written in the stars, destiny had been made for the two long before they were even born. So if he was truly her soulmate, does she have to bear the weight of his absence until she wilts?

word count: 4.1k

warning: angst, talks of character's death. had a plot, lost said plot.

notes: I haven’t written in some time even though I know I could’ve :( It was more than writer’s burnout, but even that I can’t pinpoint why. I also feel that Tumblr is the ONLY social media platform that I own where I don’t feel discouraged at any sort of interaction. I feel free here because I get to publish a story and just read other pieces by other authors. I also feel like this story has less of a plot and more of angst LOL IM SORRY OKAY i just want to cry right now haha.

“It is understandable that you are nervous.” The soft voice filled the air. Even though the windows were perched open as wide as they could to invite new air in, the witch felt incredibly suffocated. There were a lot of thoughts circulating her mind, overlapping each other and cutting one after the other before it could be completed. She felt her energy dim down by each second as her brain welcomed the traffic. Sometimes she wished there were potions that could hinder the thoughts for just a moment.

Her eyes laid on the reflection of her figure on her vanity mirror. Despite taking care of herself and getting ready to combat the obstacles of the day, sleep was one thing that did not want to cooperate with her. No matter what magic. The prominent eye bags were embarrassing to say the least after consuming concoctions after concoctions. Specifically tailored to her own suffering by some of the best Potioneers and apothecaries. The best people that came when you had pureblood family connections.

The witch was blessed (as her late mother would say) for having such luxuries in her life without ever working for it. Except, her mother didn’t say that in a ‘you have to appreciate what you have’ and more like ‘you have better things than low-life people so make sure to use it to your advantage and rub it on their faces.’ However, she never understood. Yes, she had wealth to her name, she had always been gifted with extravagant gifts ever since a mere infant, and she had all the access to so many things a normal witch didn’t. But in the far back of her mind, she had one thought on an endless repetition. She would trade it all for him back. Anything and everything.

“No. It is not. I am not just nervous, I’m,” Y/N huffed out, pushing the sentences and thoughts she would need to the most prioritized in her head. Pushing herself out of the vanity seat, she paced from one side of her room to the other. There were jitters in her legs, suddenly she needed to let out the pent up emotions in a form of movement. “I feel so angry, it is indescribable, and then I feel so down.”

A chuckle came from the previous voice, “Yes, I am very much aware of your rollercoaster of emotions. In fact, wasn’t I always the one to call you out on it?”

Y/N rolled her eyes, planting her palms on the window sill, her pupils grazed over the well-looked after garden. The male blurted, “Would it be so bad?”

Despite being caught up on the butterfly that innocently planted itself on a leaf, the witch mumbled under her train of thoughts, “I don’t know. It could go so many ways and I do not like that. Just when I thought I was settling myself into peace (that was a lie), of course Dumbledore had to reach out to me.”

She held her head low, fingers fidgeting with the ring wrapped around her finger. It was so cheesy for it to house an emerald crystal, but cheesy was one side he showed her to no one else. Y/N plopped back down on the seat, her head resting on her hands. Gorgeous. A masterpiece worked on so hard the public sought after it so much just to take it from her grasp. Maybe that’s why he wasn’t with her anymore. She sighed, getting lost in the colourless picture. The witch stared at it with so much love and longing that it might’ve pushed her back to square one, “Reggie, I wish you were here.”

Her thumb caressed the framed picture so gently.

“What do you mean, my love? I am.” The moving figure in the photo smirked, leaning his body on the side of the frame. Y/N noted the curls in his hair gently falling down his face. Tranquil nights that were not exactly innocent shared together in a bed, she had always fidgeted with the strands of hair that stuck to the sweat beads on his forehead. Nights that she can count. She missed the feeling of it between her fingers, and the way he always smelt like his cologne. It was always lingering.

“Piss off Reggie,” The wizard laughed a melody she so dearly missed. “You know what I mean.”

Regulus’ lips fall into a thin line.

“I am always with you. Remember when I spent that one summer at yours? The stupid promise I made when we were kids that I was going to haunt you even when I am dead is still being upheld.” Y/N laughed and she couldn’t help but feel the tears prickling in her eyes, “You are more than capable. We both know it. Dumbledore may had his eyes out for us back then, but he’s a man who wants to do good.”

That’s where the issue lied. Why did Dumbledore send an owl to her? Even though in the letter, the great wizard had stated that she was invited for a private meeting- that had to be the most vague reasoning ever. Not to forget the fact that Dumbledore had remembered how great of a student she was. He stated that she had great skills and assets. That was it. The line ended there… before he mentioned that the meeting would take place in 12 Grimmauld Place. That had stuffed a blockage in her throat because Y/N couldn’t breathe after slapping the letter to a close.

Despite there being no inhibitors of that house for some time, Y/N could not bear the idea of making that place her home. She could not imagine herself getting out of bed, reading a book, and cozying up in front of the fireplace (the other tasking job would have been carried out by the elf) because every corner of that house reminded her of Regulus. There was no universe where she would settle in a place that reminded her of what she no longer had. So she stayed at the house they dreamt of for their future. It was bought by their families as an engagement gift for when they had turned 17. It was young, sure, but the two were more than sure. Additionally, this was the future set up for them.

The new house still held memories of him, but not as much. It was a comprimise but she would rather make home of a place that lacked her painful memories. Wrapping a hefty, tight chain around her chest, it felt like a punishment knowing that the house was once a wish for the two. Now, it’s just her living that wish.

Regulus kept yapping reassurance, always using the wit he was adorned for while Y/N entertained herself with the countless framed pictures of Regulus. It felt like a routine at this point. A restart to the cycle she wished would just end. With a wide grin, Regulus had his fist thrown in the air as he rode the quidditch broom as if he was born for it. An arm had been thrown over her shoulders, yanking her closer to his body. The couple smiled in bliss in their infamous green robes. So innocent, so clueless for the future that was awaiting.

The witch remembered it as if it was yesterday, the jealousy that always were aimed at the two by the other pureblood children of their age. To be bethrothed before you were even breathing the air of the world was one thing; however, to be bethothed before being born and falling head over heels for one another was a one in a billion. Always reminded by her great aunts and all the women in her life that in one form or another, they had to find peace in their marriage. They had to find and make love in the marriage. It didn't apply to them.

Even though their seniors would tease and jest them for how they were always joined hip to hip every single day, they knew deep down- they craved for what they had. The compatibility between the two was a dream not even fairtytales could match. She knew that girls had eyes on Regulus, who wouldn't? But it was more than wanting the boy, it was wanting what they had. Regulus never had to reassure her despite the few times a burn had ignited in her chest. She knew they were for one another. Who could rewrite what was already written in the stars?

The ideal pureblood match.

She realized Regulus had stopped talking. The wizard watched her with such affection in his eyes, “What does Dumbledore want with me?”

The nature of the great wizard always ticked her off. Despite being praised for doing so many good deeds like Grindelwald, he did some things very harshly and brazenly. Not to forget his favoritism towards Gryffindor. It was petty of her to hold onto a memory like that after all these years, but she couldn’t help it.

“I’m not too sure either. However… the timing of the letter and my brother’s escape is too coincidental for it to be otherwise.” Regulus replied.

Great. Even though the wizard had stated in the letter that it was just a private meeting between the two, she knew the wizard always had cards up his sleeves. If she was, thereotetically, to meet Sirius Black- she would actually freeze in time. The two Black brothers didn't exactly look identical, but the black curls, their mannerism... she hoped he became a worse prick than he was in school.

Y/N sighed out, she needed to get this over with even though she really did not want to face whatever it was, "It's time."

The wizard in the frame sent a comforting smile, "You've got this, my love."

Pulling the drawer of the vanity, the hinges creaking, she pulled out a box that was kept in pristine condition. It had been so long since she needed to take it out. It's not like she left her house often. She let her eyes rest on the frame before resting her hands on its side as if it had been the most fragile thing to exist.

"See you soon, Reggie."

The lid of the box shut out the talking wizard.

There it was in all its glory. Number 12 Grimmauld Place. The rumbling and droplets of bricks had ceased, revealing the door camouflaged to all eyes except those with magic in their veins. She didn't know how to feel. Despite preparing herself for a few days and en route to apparate, she was very much not ready. Her fingers suddenly went numb. Although, the grip on her box remained tight as ever.

Y/N felt as if she had gone mad. The voice of her lover when he was a mere age of 12 played in her ears, followed by his laugh. Not even controlling her muscles, the corner of her lips curled up at the memory. The peri-puberty voice would be completely gone in a couple of years when he reached 17. Now it's a voice embroided in a picture frame.

She breathed in before taking a step forward. Just get it over with. Without even knocking, she made the boisterous creaking of the wooden door as her announcement. She had done the one thing she thought she wouldn't ever have to do. Step foot into the house her late lover would've inherited. The place reeks of him.

It was depressing- the thoughts and the place. She stood at the entrance of the incredibly narrow hallway, the walls that used to hold up framed portraits of credulous Black family members now empty with decaying portaits. Unmaintained. Corners of the wallpaper had start to curl into the air, its sharp edges prodding in the air- ready to launch attack to whomever finds confidence. The floor panels creaked with every slight step she made, and her body was enveloped by a sudden fright when she heard faint murmurs.

"Blood-traitors..."

That voice. As her head shot up with nostalgia and eyes sparkled with hope, a petite figure made way into her peripheral, stepping down from the staircase. If Y/N had to use better vocabulary, she would describe it as an aged old creature with wrinkles on its skin that matched trenches of mountains, on the other hand, she would describe it as what you would imagine sagging skin. The witch stood in the entrance, suddenly feeling the box slipping in her grip as she stared at the elf with a wide smile.

Feeling a presence in a house he was sworn to protect, the elf turned to face the witch. No, the magic in her wasn't tainted. It hadn't been touched. At all. Pure. His eyes widened while the corner of his lips curled up. A smile he had only been giving to his Mistress Walburga Black for Godric knows how long.

"Miss!" The house-elf exclaimed. Holding his cleaning equipments close to his chest, he couldn't believe it. She was right in front of him. In flesh. Excitement jitters in his frail old body, excitement he forgot he could experience. This was beyond a good day. This make ups for the blood traitor who found shelter in the house he had been taking care of ever since the Black household had vanished. Well, partially. Kreacher did not know how to react.

"Kreacher." The witch retorted back, a grin now playing on her face as she stepped closer towards him. She remembered how the house-elf was always so loyal and dedicated to the Black household. Well, to all except Sirius. There were summers when she had resided in the house- times when she truly had Regulus all to herself. Even though she wished those moments were calm and peaceful, it truly was not. The bricks of the house stayed solid until chaos erupted from the same source every single time. Sirius. Y/N lost counts of how many times she had left Regulus' room to meet the scowls on Sirius' face. Shouts after screams, arguments after disagreements- it was the norm for the Black household until Sirius had left home. Then there were never much noise.

If there was one thing Sirius was right about, it was the more time Y/N and Regulus had spent time together- the deeper they were in the hell-hole of trouble.

The house-elf stared up in amazement, "Miss! Kreacher has missed you! Kreacher has lost count how long it has been since Kreacher had seen Miss!"

Sitting on the edge of her tongue, the witch readied herself to reply to the joyness but not a word. Not a speckle of sound was made. How long has it truly been? It was a foolish question to ask since she had been counting ever since Regulus had left home and never came back. A decade and a half. A chunk of one's life and she still believed that her heart could not be mended. Her heart heavy wherever she went, even the short walk through her garden. Maybe if she left her house more often and saw more people than those that came to visit hers for services, she would've moved on. Would it be wrong? To devote yourself to one person who you thought your future lied with, then find someone else? Would it be so selfish?

"It has been some time, Kreacher."

The house-elf nodded eagerly, he thought today would be like no other except for the fact that he now has another burden on his plate, "Kreacher hasn't seen Miss in so long, Kreacher asks what is Miss' business in the Black's home?"

"She's here for me."

The split second she gaped her mouth to respond, another much deeper voice responded. Standing at the staircase stood a man with little to no life in him, Azkaban truly sucked the life out of him. His skin lost its colour, grey and pale, almost sickly. His eyes looked like it sunk in deeper than before, he lost fat in his cheeks, and his beard somehow trimmed. He obviously controlled whatever he could, but a few months would not bring back the soul he had 12 years ago.

"Welcome back,” The wizard gave her a tight smile as if he knew she was trying to get under his skin. Well, she wasn't exactly trying- after years of not getting along together, it just happened naturally. Y/N tilted her head, "Thought I was meeting Dumbledore."

"Well," He shot back, leaning on the railings (that was enough for the house-elf to take his leave despite not wanting to), "You thought wrong. I have no idea how people falling for his tricks.”

She chuckled at the absurdity.

“What are you doing here?” Sirius shot an eyebrow at her question. For a moment she thought she had asked the wrong question. No. She did not. As he made down the last few steps, the man stood in front of her. At an angle, maybe with lots of alterations and blurring, he looked like her Reggie.

“It’s my home. Well, house,” He quickly corrected himself. “Though, I’m surprised.”

When he noticed she didn’t understand him, he continued, “This place was to be yours, was it not? But you left. Abandoned it even.”

While he had the joy to crane his neck around at the place that seemed to be holding onto its last thread, she had her eyes set on his face. He found it humorous. Funny. Amusing. There were not enough words in the English vocabulary to describe the burning in her chest. The wizard turned to her face, “So why are you not occupying it?”

“You’re infuriating as ever.”

“Thank you for the compliment.”

As much as she wanted to stupefy the man before her, there was one question she wanted an answer to. So many questions but she yearned to have its replied to. She mumbled, eyes wandering on the diminshed trimmings of the walls- something she suddenly became fascinated with, “How did you find out?”

He hummed, waiting for her to finish.

“How did you find out about him?”

Him. She clutched the cardboard box harder, leaving small indents of pressure that could be brought back with a little magic. Losing Regulus was something she had to make peace with, but having a photo framed of him that was capable of communicating with her did not make it easy. Especially when she had begged numerous times at the beginning where he had been. Where he had gone to.

'Your mind is clouded with questions that I cannot answer, and I am sorry that I will never be able give you that clarity. My absence will leave a hole in your days. I know that it is selfish of me to know of its consequence and still pursue with it but I wish you a good life, a life we talk so much of. A life that I can no longer be part of. No danger will trail you, our past is the past.'

The words were choked out of her throat as the sudden recall of his letter clenched her heart.

Sirius wet his lips, “Kreacher did. That was after I checked his room.”

Regulus' room. The room she had made enemies with ever since the disappearance. She bet it remained the same. The sheets made neat (just how Walburga liked it), the carpet inched slightly to an odd angle, the broomstick leaned against the wall, and the framed picture of them freed of dusts.

"Although, that elf never mentioned anything."

The glossy appearance of her eyes vanished into the air once she brought her attention back to the escapee in front of her. It was the same response she received when she had gone on her knees for the house-elf, begging with bursting springs out of her eyes.

You are truly cruel, Regulus.

"He said the same thing to me."

Now it was Sirius' time to be intrigued, "Were you not head over heels for my brother? Or am I missing some bits here?"

Y/N couldn't help but to chuckle. Sirius and Regulus was the face of the rebellion for the phrase 'blood runs thicker than water'. He did not know what happened to his brother, he did not seem to be bothered by it. They dare say Slyterins were full of hatred.

"Let's move to the tapestry."

Understanding of how suffocating it was in the narrow entrance, the two magical beings stood in the room that had generations of the Black family marked on. A room full of history. There was one name she only sought out for, and she lost herself in his name.

"I don't know either. One... one day," She cleared her throat, noticing how her emotions were gripping around her words. "He held me like it was our last time. I jokingly asked if he would miss me for a few hours. He didn't say anything. Once he left that door, he never came back home."

Her fingers traced over the 'some fifteen years earlier' text.

"I knew how strong he was. He was more than capable but I could not find sleep that night. It felt like there was something in me- telling me that something was not right. The bed felt wrong, the air was wrong- it all felt wrong. I then saw the sun awaking, so I did too. And on top of the kitchen table was this."

The wizard looked at the carboard box she was handing to him. He had been extremely curious as to what she was holding, but did not inquire. His breath stilled. The lid came off to reveal the young man he had grown up with. While he looked like he aged a hundred years with tattoos scattered all over his body, the wizard in the photo frame had encapsulated his youth. No moment would have prepared him when a voice rang into his ears.

"Oh, hello, brother."

Sirius nearly flipped the box out of his hands if it wasn't for Y/N's quick reflexes. The box floated in the air whilst the magic residue from her wand evaporated into the air.

"What- what is that!" Clearly he wasn't aware of the invention.

"A picture frame."

"Well, clearly it is! What do you take me for? A fool?"

Before he could snap another remark at her, Regulus chirped up, "I think we all do, Sirius."

The wizard took a step back as Y/N pulled out the frame out of the box, displaying the moving picture. It was as if Regulus was inside the frame. Stuck. It could not be.

"Regulus... I don't know how to explain it but he enchanted it as if it was him."

Sirius took a deep breath in before looking back at the picture frame, suddenly very aware of his surrounding. He did not know if he should throw a fist or flee from the room. What magic was this? He has never heard of an interactive picture frame.

"What dark magic have you guys dabbled in?"

Y/N threw a hard glance at him, "It is not dark magic."

"Then what is it? There is no such thing as a talking picture! I've seriously gone mad. Merlin."

Regulus and Y/N watched as Sirius gripped his mane of a hair, crouching onto the ground whilst he rock himself slowly. He was mumbling incoherent things under his breath. Regulus could not help the stiffle that escaped his lips. The younger wizard found it beyond amusing. It was entertaining him. At the sound, Sirius snapped up, pointing fingers at the picture frame.

"Why are you showing me this?"

"To show you how great of a wizard he was, Sirius. I, of all people, knew the dispute between you two. You don't need the closure but I know deep down, you wonder just the same as me. We grew up together under this roof and we both have so many unanswered questions."

"I know the irrational and troubling things we did back then, but we grew up, we saw things we didn't before. Despite all the evil we were in, Regulus and Kreacher refused to tell me what happened. Not a bit. I know that I cannot be the only one to mourn him because Regulus is more than a stranger- he's your baby brother."

Sirius's eyes met with her glossy ones, the term sounded so foreign to him. The man whose voice was not heard and thrown behind bars felt a pin poke his heart as he realized the woman before him seeked answers he now also wants.

[anakin-pilled]

SILVER SPRINGS (Lo'ak x Fem! Reader)

pairing: lo'ak x fem! reader

wordcount: 7.6k

warnings: angst, fandom cliches, amateur writing, bantering, unrequited love (?), complex family dynamics, A LOT OF CLICHES IM SORRY, bad pacing (my bad bro idk how to pace a story im new to this), not sure what else as this is pretty tame

rating: SFW! though my blog is 18+ because i interact with nsfw content, anyone can technically read this?

taglist: @teyamsatan

author's note: okay hi this is my first fanfic that i've ever written before? not counting fanfics i wrote in middle school anyway i got the idea for this fanfic after listening to silver springs by fleetwood mac and i was so obsessed with this idea that i had to make it come true? im a huge neteyam girly so this is a shocker that my first fic ever is about lo'ak (he's my babygirl, just not the LOML like neteyam). uhhh im only familiar with academic writing and this is my first time EVER dipping my toe into the waters of creative writing so pls bear with me if this is not perfect. i actually think this is quite flat and tbh i hate the pacing like its actually awful and there is so much room for improvement, but hey what can i do? IM A NEWBIE AT THIS!! with that being said, if you do decide to read, please treat me with some grace because i am sensitive and i did this purely for fun!!! i know my lo'ak stans are starving for fics and im here to deliver!!!! i am not a professional or seasoned writer by any means but i really tried my best to create something enjoyable ): i don't know why this ended up being so long but it did and there WILL be a part two, i already have it outlined. SO WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, here is my first avatar fanfiction!!

proofread and edited but i got lazy toward the end LOL if you see any mistakes, please tell me kindly <3

You could be my silver spring

Blue-green colors flashin'

I would be your only dream

Your shinin' autumn ocean crashin'

The forest blended into a mixture of vibrant colors as you ran away from the incoming threat. Beautiful shades of blue, green, and purple passed around you. The feeling of the bare ground, soft and pliant from the morning dew, normally imbued you with a sense of stability and peace. As long as your feet were on the ground and connected to Ewya’s bountiful moon, you knew everything would be alright. However, this time, the feeling of the bare ground underneath your feet felt the opposite of stable and peaceful. The ground served as a reminder of how much longer you had to run until you reached the safe confines of the Omitikaya clan. 

You stopped running with a quick halt. Your chest heaved up and down as you tried to catch your breath. The beads in your hair clacked together in a cacophony as you looked around in different directions. The sun broke through the tree canopy and highlighted the forest like a kaleidoscope. Swish. You quickly turned your head to the other side to catch sight of what made the noise but all you could see was the rustling of the bush–as if whatever you were looking for was looking for you too before running off. Without a second to spare, you dashed in the direction of the village. But you only made it a few feet ahead of you before you were tackled by something heavy and shoved to the forest ground.

“I win.” said the voice from above in a triumphant, but annoying, manner. 

“You got to be faster than that, ‘eylan.” As you shaded your eyes with your hand, you were met with the illuminating picture of Lo’ak on top of you. The sun shone above on Lo’ak and cast him in beautiful rays of light. He looked like an angel–like a celestial being sent straight from Ewya’s heart and into your eyesight. Though you have never seen an angel, Norm described them as ethereal and pure religious beings. And at this moment, Lo’ak was an angel. 

“Get off me, fatass.” You said as you pushed Lo’ak weight off your body. You secretly loved the weight of his body on yours and how it radiated a warmth that hugged your body and soul. Lo’ak rolled off with ease and laid next to you on the foliage. “Hey! No need to insult me because you lost yet another round of hunter and prey.” 

Hunter and prey. A game that all Omitcayan children played growing up. And though you and Lo’ak were no longer children, you continued to play this game. Lo’ak claims it’s a great way to burn energy and let loose. You suspected he liked playing so often because it allowed him to avoid whatever daily chores his father, the Olo’eyktan, assigned him. And while you could think of better ways to spend your time, you indulged in Lo’ak’s childish whims because it brought him happiness. What type of best friend would you be if you didn’t? 

“I’m not insulting you because I lost. I could care less about losing,” You explained. “I’m insulting you because tackled me to the ground and put your entire weight on my body. Lay off the yovo fruit and I might insult you less.” 

Lo’ak scoffed at your response and stuck his tongue out in a mocking manner. “You mean the yovo fruit that Spider and I specifically collected because you asked for it? Yeah, I got put on ikran pen duty for a week after that since we missed curfew.” 

You simply rolled your eyes and aimed your middle finger at Lo’ak. Yeah, you definitely spent way too much time around Lo’ak. 

You both basked in the sun and listened to the sound of the forest: your home, your comfort place, the lifeline of the People. You thanked Eywa every day for the forest and the way it provided for you endlessly–from the delicious yovo fruit, to the medicinal herbs, fauna, and everything in between. There was a gentle rustle in the air as it approached low afternoon. If closed your eyes and listened hard enough, you could hear the faint buzz of the insects and the leaves fluttering. 

As you turned on your side to face Lo’ak, you noticed he still had his eyes shut. Your eyes raked over his stripes–the stripes that would forever be engrained in your brain–and focused on the armband that fits snugly on his upper arm. The weaved armband was made out of dried, violet stalks from the tstxa'a plant and braided into a traditional, intricate Omatikayan pattern. You added tiny clay beads that you hand-molded and painted a color very similar to a marigold–you captured copious amounts of juice from the banana fruit just to have enough pigment to create a dye. A small smile appeared on your face as you recall how long it took you to make the armband. 

Your eyes slowly made their way toward his face. They widened as they realized Lo’ak’s eyes were open and staring at you too. The air was charged with tension as you both continued to stare at each other in silence. 

You and Lo’ak always had this weird ability to communicate through eye contact alone. Your friendship, which was forged in childhood, ran so deep that words failed to represent what your eyes could. He was your other half as much as you were his. In these small moments of intimacy, you remember just how much you love Lo’ak. There was an unspoken bond between you two–a bond that went beyond friendship and teetered on the edge of romantic love. And while it was undeniable that there was something more happening between the two of you, your relationship stayed on that flimsy edge. 

“What are you thinking about,” you whispered in a tone so soft that it reached Lo’ak ears like a tender caress. 

“Oh, nothing. Just thinking,” Lo’ak replied with a teasing lilt in his voice and a glitter in his amber eyes. While everyone in the Omatikaya clan had the same shades of bright, yellow eyes, you thought Lo’ak had the prettiest. You raised the muscle on your face, where your eyebrows would have been if you had, and furrowed your forehead in suspicious knowing. 

“Thinki-” “I’m thinking about how funny it would be if I beat your ass in another round of hunter and prey! Last one to the village has to take over foraging duty!,” Lo’ak shouted with a boyish smile as he got up quickly and ran in the direction of his kelku.  

You got up from the lush grass and ran after him with another exacerbated breath.

The day drawled along as you patrolled the forest for the dandetiger tree. You looked for its long, azure leaves and armored trunk. As a healer in training, you were tasked by Mo’at to look for the tree for samples of the resin-like substance that it leaked. The sticky substance was extremely helpful to the Omatikaya clan in many ways as it behaved like an adhesive. It was especially important to healers as they used the dangetiger tree as part of treating wounds and ensuring bandages stuck and protected healing wounds. The healing hut ran low on its supply, thus you found yourself wandering through the forest. Kiri offered to accompany you, but you could tell she rather focus on perfecting the paste she was mixing. A major perk of being best friends with Lo’ak is that you also became close with his family and found a small niche within the Sully family.

You were an extension of Lo’ak, but also the opposite of him in some ways. Whereas Lo’ak was more energetic and impulsive, you were calmer and sensical. You both balanced each other perfectly; you were the yin to his yang. While Lo’ak’s nature often got him in trouble with his family, namely his father and older brother, you loved his high energy and zest for life. Sure, he could use more pragmatism in his daily thinking, but you saw Lo’ak’s personality as a blessing more than a hindrance, especially in times of war and destruction. If Lo’ak was your sun, then you were his moon–stable and outer-worldly. You were unwavering. Your nurturing nature and kind soul always amazed Lo’ak, even in the worse of times, you took it upon yourself to think and act as an optimist. You carried yourself with a sense of dignity that Lo’ak wishes he could replicate.

Though none of you ever admitted it out loud, you and Lo’ak knew that you loved each other in a way that best friends didn’t.

Despite your differences, you both had a passion for exploring and adventure. If Lo’ak went anywhere, you followed. And if he got in any trouble, you were only a few steps behind him. While Lo’ak intention for mischief was partially caused by the motivation to piss off his father, you believed that Eywa made Pandora for the purpose of exploring. Why would she make Pandora so magnificent and rich in life if not to experience every single crevice, nook, and cranny of it? While the forest would always be your home and the place you want to spend the rest of your life in, you could not deny the appeal of a nomadic lifestyle like the Olangi clan. However, with the return of the sky people on Pandora, your exploring had been cut to a short. Unable to venture into the unknown parts of the forest, the parts that resulted in a scolding or two from both your mom and Mr. Sully, you were forced to stay within the clan’s boundary lines.

Your thoughts were cut short as your heard movement in the background. The bag on your shoulder was discarded to the ground as you took out your bow and arrow. You were no warrior, but you begged Lo’ak to teach you enough to be able to defend yourself. Any Na’vi should know this little. You prayed to Eywa that it wasn’t a palulukan, or worse—a sky demon. A bead of sweat rolled down the side of your face as you aimed your bow in the direction of where you heard the noise. You aimed at the bushes before letting your final finger release the bow.

“Relax, syulang! It’s just me, Lo’ak!,” he said as he came out from the bushes of loreyu and walked to where you were standing. “Lo’ak,” you huffed with annoyance in your voice. “Don’t scare me like that, you skxawng! I was really focused on finding a dandetiger tree. Tsahik’s orders. What are you even doing here? I thought you were training with your father.”

“Lo’ak,” you huffed with annoyance in your voice. “Don’t scare me like that, you skxawng! I was really focused on finding a dandetiger tree. Tsahik’s orders. What are you even doing here? I thought you were training with your father.” 

As Lo’ak walked closer to you, you noticed the downturn expression on his face. Your immediate heart softened. He must have had another fight with his father, you thought to yourself. Lo’ak turned his face toward yours and you saw the unshed tears in his eyes that threatened to fall any second now.

“I, uh, I was training with my father until we got into a fight and I stormed off,” he said with a shaky breath. You could tell Lo’ak was trying to keep his composure, not wanting to show that vulnerable side he desperately tries to hide away. Yet, you knew better than that. Every time Lo’ak tried to shut down and hide his emotions, you came running after him and knocked down the fragile walls he built around himself. The walls were fragile because Lo’ak knew he would and could never shut you out completely. He took a deep, shaky breath before continuing, “I’m just so sick of it. He expects me to be this perfect son and soldier all in one, but I’m not Neteyam. I’m just Lo’ak.”

You always thought Lo’ak was the most complex person you ever met. He was the second-born son of the revered Toruk Makto and mighty Palulukun Makto. But, Lo’ak was so much more than that to you. He was more than both of his parents. Though he would never admit it, Lo’ak was a lost soul. Not quite like Neteyam, the mighty warrior and dutiful son, or the spiritual Kiri who was literally like Ewya’s disciple. Hell, even everyone knew Tuk would grow into a fine, strong-spirited woman! Lo’ak didn't know where he fit in his family. Of course, the Sully family loved him, and Lo’ak loved his family just as much. But that still didn’t stop the gnawing, deep feeling in Lo’ak’s subconscious from telling him that he would never amount to greatness like the rest of his family. You wished Lo’ak wouldn’t be so hard on himself because you also had a deep feeling in your subconscious that Lo’ak was destined for greatness–the feeling was embedded so deep in your bones that you would bet your left on it. 

“I know that I’m a fuck up.” 

“You’re no-”

“It’s okay, syulang. I know I’m a fuck up. I can see it in the tribes’ faces every time they hear my father lecture me, or worse, hear Neteyam lecture me. I can see it in my fathers’ eyes and in the way the rest of my family pities me.”

“Your family doesn’t pity you, Lo’ak. If anything, they pity the way your father has been forced into this weird dichotomy of the punisher and protector ever since the sky demons returned and how it’s taken an effect on your relationship,” you tried to explain as sweetly as possible. 

You took a step closer to Lo’ak and examined his face. Though his tears had dried and his eyes were now puffy, you could still tell there was a great sadness within him. You wished you could take all his pain and suffering so he didn’t have to. 

“I don’t know who I am besides the fuck up, or the troublemaker. I feel like my entire existence is defined by all the things I am not. Defined by the way I’m different from Neteyam or Kiri. I want to be defined by who I am, but I don’t even know who that is most of the time,” said Lo’ak. “I try so hard, but it is never enough to satisfy my father. Or myself. I feel this heavy pressure in my chest and no matter what I do to relieve it, it stays. If I am not meant to be the next Olo’eyktan or the next Tsahik, then who am I meant to be? Sure–I am training to become a warrior, but I’m not sure if this is something I want or if it is a role I am forced into. I know I’m impulsive and reckless and irresponsible, but I try so hard, but what if that isn’t enough to look over all my flaws and mistakes?”

You moved even closer and tucked one of Lo’ak’s front braids behind his ear. You always loved his hair like this. It suited his face so well. His braids were adorned by various beads, each with its own significance and memory attached to them. The beads he wore today were a pretty amethyst color. Your mind quickly flashbacked to the day you both created the matching beads. You both swam all day in one of the forest’s ponds trying to find the purple stones underwater so you could both craft new beads. Lo’ak almost passed out from lack of air twice and your hair was so tangled by the end of the day that it took your mother three hours to undo the gnarly knots. It was totally worth it, however, because you gained new accessories and memories to match. But before you could let yourself get too far away in the past, you shifted your attention towards Lo’ak and began to speak.

“I see you, Lo’ak. I see all of you. I know that you feel like a lost soul and that you get too caught up in comparing yourself to the rest of your family. And I truly wished you didn’t compare yourself to others so much because you are so special.” Lo’ak’s face grew warm at your words. Before he could respond, you interrupted him and continued to talk. “You feel like you are too different from your family and think you do not fit in, but you do! You are the light of your family; you bring laughter and happiness. The Sully dynamic would not be the same without you–it would be too serious and no one would have fun! Lo’ak, you have a strong heart like your father. Even though you could use some impulse control, I know you never have ill intentions. We are still so young and have so much more maturing to do. Do not let yourself be defined by the mistakes of your past. Mistakes are bound to happen–they are as natural as birth and death. You’re the light of my life too. Without you, there is no one else in this clan that could make me smile as much as you do. No one to explore with and quench our thirst for curiosity. You say that you are impulsive, but there is too much excitement in your body to contain it. I love seeing your excitement and wander–it is a reminder of Pandora’s goodness and the way Eywa intended us to live. You are not irresponsible, you are just learning along the way like we all are. There is no one like you, and my heart is torn because you do not see yourself in the same way. I pray to Eywa that you could see yourself through my eyes.” You then placed one hand on Lo’ak’s chest, right above his heart.

“​​Nga yawne lu oer, Lo’ak.” There was no going back now. You said it–the words that would either be fatal to your soul or make your heart sore higher than the Hallejuah Mountains. And though there was a risk of Lo’ak rejecting you completely, you jumped off the fragile cliff that your friendship lived on. All the intimate moments, the knowing smiles, and the lifetime of shared memories led you to this moment. 

A moment of silent pass as you waited for Lo’ak’s response to your confession. Lo'ak did not expect you to confess, but he knew at some point it was bound to happen. Just not right now, under these cruel circumstances, in a time of devastation.

You shouldn’t have confessed. Lo’ak wasn’t ready for it.

The look in your eyes was so sincere and so full of unconditional love. You are the only person who could truly see Lo’ak for everything that he is and everything he was meant to become. The light hit your eyes in the right way and Lo’ak could swear they were glittering. Ewya blessed her with both heart and beauty, he said in his head. Lo’ak could only stare as he still reeled from your heartfelt speech. He wasn’t an idiot—Lo’ak knew that there was a special chemistry between him and his best friend. And he also knew that it was the type of chemistry that only two people in love have. Lo’ak has known ever since he was a small child that you were his endgame. Your years spent together only solidified his hypothesis. 

Life on Pandora could be unforgiving and unrelenting, but you were the complete opposite. You were forgiving, always ready to accept Lo’ak back into your arms and heart after every mistake he made. Though these mistakes were rarely made towards you, you still welcomed him every time. You were always there for him. But, Lo’ak didn’t fall in love with you because of the fact you were always there for him. It did play a big part, but Lo’ak knew that would be a selfish reason for falling in love. Instead, Lo’ak fell in love with you because you were…well, you. You were kind and always treated your fellow clan members with the utmost consideration and respect. You were perceptive, never wanting to misconstrue a situation and analyzing all nuances before speaking on something. Because of this, everything you said or did was genuine. Lo’ak loved this the most about you. Where Lo’ak felt everyone in the clan (excluding his family and Spider) give him fake niceties, you were 100% authentic towards him. You never condescendingly spoke to him or treated him like a chore that had to be put up with. Compassion and understanding were what you treated Lo’ak with. These are all things he rarely experienced with other Na’vi. Yet, you also weren’t afraid to call out Lo’ak on his bullshit and humble him. You somehow balanced outspokenness and tenderness all at once. This lit a fire in Lo’ak soul.

This thought both excited and scared him. The thought of loving someone unconditionally, and being loved unconditionally, seemed like something too good to be true. Only something reserved for people who deserved it. Lo’ak knew you deserved unconditional love, but it couldn’t be with him. Despite everything you said about him and the way it almost glued together his broken self-esteem, Lo’ak could not return your confession in good consciousness. It’s not that Lo’ak didn't love you–hell, he loves you more than anyone or anything on this moon! But, his insecurities would not allow you to love him or allow him to love you. He didn’t deserve to love or be loved, not when his insecurities kept up awake at night, taunting his brain with “You’ll never be good enough” or “You’re a failure of a son and brother.” You deserved better than Lo’ak and all of his broken parts. You needed someone who was the best–someone like Neteyam, but not Neteyam himself because that would be the final nail in Lo’ak’s coffin. Lo’ak knows his recklessness, impulsivity, and natural gravitation toward the unknown was acceptable because he is young. These may be the traits you love about Lo’ak now, but he knows very well these are the same traits that can make you fall out of love with him too. After all, you won’t be young forever and it won’t be cute forever. But what if he never grows out of this? What if this is who he is meant to be? No, Lo’ak would not subject you to this fate. 

And so, for once in his life, Lo’ak let fear take over his decision. Your face morphed into an expression of shock and confusion before settling on a still face.

“I am sorry, syulang. I can’t do this right now.” 

You watched Lo’ak retreat from the spot you both stood in. What the fuck just happened?

You spent the next few days in a strange haze as you processed what happened between you and Lo’ak. At first, you were angry. How could Lo’ak just leave you hanging like that? For Ewya’s sake, he could have said anything else and it would have been a better response than what he said. You laid your fucking heart out on your sleeve, waiting for Lo’ak to take it and claim it forever. After your initial response to the situation, you started to worry. Maybe you misinterpreted your relationship. What if Lo’ak didn’t love you and you just thought he did because of how close you were? No, that didn’t sound right. You knew Lo’ak loved you too. Not even in a delusional way to comfort yourself, but there was no denying you both loved each other. Did you just confess at the wrong time? Perhaps it would have been better if you confessed when Lo’ak wasn’t fighting with his father. But, you didn’t even mean to confess! Well, you did mean to confess but not at that exact moment. You were trying to comfort Lo’ak and reassure him that he was wrong, that someone could love him. It just seemed like the right thing to say. What if it wasn’t? What if it overwhelmed Lo’ak and pushed him away? Now you felt like the jerk for confessing at such a moment. But Lo’ak was a jerk too for just leaving you! You really wished you could talk to him, or that he would talk to you, but the timing was horrible. The war party went out a few days ago, and it was Lo’ak’s first time joining the mission. But of course, things never go as planned. Over-enthusiasm from Lo’ak’s and an injured Neteyam caused Mr. Sully to put Lo’ak on lockdown for the last few days. This was the first day Lo’ak was allowed some freedom to explore, that’s what Kiri told you before she left with her brother, Spider, and Tuk. You wanted to join them in their adventure today, but you were still reeling from your last conversation with Lo’ak and decided it would be better to stay in the village. You needed one more day to unscramble your thoughts before approaching him.

The tension between you and Lo’ak had been festering, but it quickly came to a stop once you saw him walk back into the village with his entire family. Jake and Neytiri walked walk in front of their children with heavy looks on their faces. Jake looked angry, yet worn at the same time. His mouth was pressed in a tight line and the wrinkles in his forehead looked more apparent than they ever have before. Neytiri walked beside Jake with Tuk’s hand in hers in a tight grasp, as if she never wanted to let her baby go ever again. Her expression was harder to read, but you could tell the tsakarem was worried by her stiff posture. Kiri trailed behind her parents with a slouchy form and arms across her torso. She looks dejected. And finally in the back were Neteyam and Lo’ak. Spider was nowhere to be seen, which you found odd as he went with the rest of the Sully children into the forest, but you assumed he must have gone back to the human outpost before curfew. 

I wonder what happened. Something must have happened if the entire family walked in like that. 

Jake and Neytiri quickly made their way to their kelku and closed the opening flaps before any of their children could come in. The Sully children then made their way toward the side of their kelku and leaned forward on their hands as they attempted to listen to their parent's conversation. You wanted to make your way towards them and figure out what the hell happened. Just as you were about to walk over to them, Lo’ak turned around and his eyes scanned the village as if he were looking for something or someone. Lo’ak’s eyes then met yours and with a small nod, you understood what he was trying to say. Later. At our spot. 

Your stomach turned to bubbles as a feeling of cold anxiety washed over your body. You weren’t sure if it was because of Lo’ak or something else, but you knew whatever it was, it was not good. 

Lo’ak was already sitting on the bioluminescent forest floor when you arrived at the small clearing which was designated as our spot. It was a hidden clearing–away from any of the main trails and hunting and gathering spots that the clan used. You first found the clearing one day after playing a round of hunter and prey with Lo’ak and Spider. 

Flashback

You were both 12 years old. Your hair was cut in a sharp, shoulder-length bob because you claimed long hair only got in the way. A bright orange and yellow ombre feather decorated the underside of your hair. A simple beige-toned weaved top and matching ‘tewng adorned your small body as you ran away from Lo’ak. He loved playing the role of hunter–you assumed it because of the way Lo’ak looked up to his father.  He wanted to be like the Olo’eyktan in every way possible. This was before their relationship had a strain in it. Both you and Lo’ak were unmarred from the harshness of war. The only thought that filled both of your minds was what adventure you would get into next. 

As you giggled profusely and thought of where to run next, you noticed that you were in a different part of the forest that you never visited before. You searched for any familiar landmarks, or plants that would signify where you were. The giggles that previously escaped your mouth quieted down as the situation dawned on you. You were lost in the forest all alone! Your mom was going to kill you, but only if a nantang or palulukun didn’t kill you first. 

“Lo’ak, are you there!!!!!,” you screamed at the top of your lungs. That probably wasn’t the smartest move. A predator could be attracted to your sound. But you figured it would be better to call for Lo’ak. If any predators came, you could climb a tree and wait it out. 

“Lo’ak!!!” you continued. Worry was starting to creep in. If you didn’t find Lo’ak soon, there was no way you would be able to survive the night in the forest. 

As you looked around the clearing again, you noted that it was quite pretty. A small pond, decorated with pink paysyuls, sat in the middle of the forest. The sun streamed through the trees and you could see the fishes elegantly swim in the water. A pack of loreyu sat directly across the pond, along with eanean bushes right next to it. The clearing was simple, but you knew that it was much more than that. Like everything else Eywa created, the clearing served a purpose and was spiritually connected to the Na’vi. Perhaps its purpose was unknown until this moment. You decided that the purpose of the clearing would be a secret spot only known to both you and Lo’ak. The thought excited you, and you quickly imagined a lifetime of moments here.

Flashback Over

Lo’ak sat with his arms extended behind him with his back facing you. You could see the tension in his back muscle as he sat there, looking up towards the night sky. One of Polyphemus’ moons was shaped like an ikran claw. Despite the moon’s brightness in the sky, the stars still twinkled. A soft, minty green glow emitted from the bioluminescent leaves Lo’ak sat upon. His tanhi, patterned perfectly on his body like Ewya directly hand placed each freckle herself, glowed like the sky above him. Lo’ak was lost in his thoughts as he silently spoke to Ewya, questioning what her intention was. You cleared your throat to grab Lo’ak’s attention.

“Hey…” he muttered under his breath. You replied with a soft hello before taking your place next to him. There was still an awkward tension lingering between the two of you, but you pushed it away. Whatever happened a few days ago didn’t matter anymore. You knew something serious happened in the Sully family and you knew your best friend needed you right now. 

“Do you want to tell me what happened this time?” you quoted Lo’ak as you looked into his eyes for the first time in a few days. The dark lighting only enhanced the rich shade of his honey-colored eyes. They glowed brightly in the dark. His eyes resembled the shiny topaz glass jewels located deep in the rainforests’ many caverns–both were a sight to behold. 

Lo’ak thought he should rip the bandage off. There was no point in delaying the traumatic news he just received from his parents. 

“My family and I are leaving the forest.” 

You were confused by his statement. Leaving where? There was no other place to go. The forest was your home, his home. “Do you mean that you’re visiting another tribe for diplomatic reasons,” you asked with a slight tilt in your head to match confusion. Why would this be so important that he needed to meet you at your spot? This wouldn’t be the first time the Sully family has left on diplomatic retreats.

“No, (Y/N). My family and I are leaving the forest permanently,” Lo’ak replied. Your heart dropped into the pits of your stomach. Now you were just getting annoyed. You haven’t spoken to Lo’ak in the days, and the first thing he does is try to pull at your leg. “Lo’ak if this is a joke, then it’s not funny. What are you talking about?” you said with a stern voice. Lo’ak stared at you as if he didn’t want to explain further. It’s true, he didn’t want to explain further because it meant that what was happening was real and there was no way to delay or stop the situation.

“Earlier today, when we were exploring the forest, we saw footprints in the dirt that didn’t belong to any Na’vi. It was sky demons. We followed the footsteps to an abandoned shack. I knew we weren’t supposed to be there, but then we spotted a group of uniltìranyu in military gear. I quickly paged my father and let him know what we found. But as we were trying to leave back to the forest, the uniltìranyu captured us and held us hostage…”

“What?” you let out in shock. The magnitude of Lo’ak’s words hit you like a poisoned arrow. Dreamwalkers? How could that be true? The last dream walker to walk the ground of Pandora was Jake Sully…and that was 14 years ago.

“I-I  thought we were going to die. They treated us like we were animals. As if we were the ones who invaded their planet and deserved to be captured and hung. All I felt was primal fear and the instinctual reaction to protect my family. We were held hostage until my parents and brother came to our rescue. But, it was too late by then. They figured out who were and our relation to my father.  They even captured Spider…” Lo’ak had to stop speaking. The familiar tightening of his throat began. You could tell he was about to cry, but you pushed further. Honestly, your brain was fuzzy at this point. It was so fuzzy to the point that you didn’t even process the news of Spider, your tiny human friend, being captured. It completely slipped your mind. You didn’t have time to think about the implications of this news as you could only process one thing and one thing only: Lo’ak was leaving. The Sullys were leaving!

“What does that have to do with you leaving the forest?”

“Don’t you understand, syulang? They know who we are. Our lives are at risk! The whole clan is at risk if we continue to stay.” Lo’ak explained in frustration. “I don’t want this, I don’t want to leave the only place I’ve ever known. How can I leave the forest while Spider is out there, going through Eywa knows what, with those demons? How can I leave you?” Fat, wet tears streamed down Lo’ak’s face as he spoke. 

Crack. The sound of your heart breaking reverberated in your ears. All you could hear was a dull ringing. Your best friend, the love of your life–how could he just leave like that? You questioned the will of Eywa. How could she be so cruel to tear you both apart? Especially after your confession the other day? You wanted to curse and scream and cry all at once. However, you knew you had to be strong for Lo’ak. 

You held Lo’ak’s body in silence. You were both in a catatonic state. An hour or so had passed since his initial confession. The atmosphere was serene, a heavy contrast from the dark storm brewing in both of your minds. This may be the last time you would ever get to hold Lo’ak like this and fully enjoy his presence. All of the years spent together slowly meshed in your mind as you tried to calm yourself down with memories of happier times. You honestly didn’t know how you could survive this life without your other half. 

Lo’ak wasn’t faring any better than you. His continuous sniffles vibrated on your body. He barely looked up, wanting to savor the feeling of your bodies pressed together in such an intimate way. His mind was in a haze as he processed the situation. This wasn’t real life, it couldn’t be real life. His life was perfectly balanced with you. If Eywa sought to protect the balance of life, why would she take you away from him? Why would she take away Spider? 

Tomorrow is never promised. That is a cruel lesson you learned today. It was probably best that you and Lo’ak head back to the village and sleep, but you didn’t want this night to end. You wanted to savor every last moment. Memorize every stripe on Lo’ak’s body, every green speck in his eyes, the way his eyebrows moved, and how his body felt right next to yours. How could you say goodbye to 14 years of memories in one night? It seemed impossible. 

As you stared at the light reflecting off the pond, you knew there was one topic you had to broach. You weren’t sure if this was the right time, but it was the only chance you had. After all, Lo’ak only had one more day in the clan before his family set off to Eywa knows where. You knew the forest of Pandora held many clans, but you suspected his family would be going somewhere even further than that. You tried to calm the rapid pace of your heart, but your nerves refused to settle down. So, you sent a quick prayer to Ewya, turned to Lo’ak, and quietly said, “The other night, when I said I love you, why didn’t you say it back?”

You didn’t want to fight with Lo’ak–not on a night like this, where blood has been shed and a family has been torn from normalcy. But, you had to talk to Lo’ak about this. What if you never saw him again? You couldn’t live the rest of your life with unresolved feelings. It would drive you utterly insane and wreck your soul for as long as you live. 

(Y/N)...”

“I’m being serious, Lo’ak. Why did not you say it back? I know this is the last thing on your mind right now, but you cannot leave me hanging. You owe me more than that and you know it,” you said with determination in your voice. 

You then stood up. This was not a conversation you could have sitting down. The anxiety coursing through your veins made it impossible to sit still. Lo’ak followed your actions and stood up too. 

“I was afraid,” he replied.

“Afraid of what Lo’ak? We have always been so honest with each other.” You thought you would always understand Lo’ak, but perhaps you were mistaken. You didn’t understand what there was to be afraid of. You both loved each other, shouldn’t that be enough? You failed to realize that love isn’t enough sometimes. There are forces beyond your control that make love unsustainable and out of your reach, despite how close you are to it. Eywa did not teach you this lesson. Lo’ak did. 

Lo’ak was faced with two choices at this moment: he could confess his love to you or he could deny it. He so desperately wished he could choose the first choice. Something within him would not allow himself to whether it was because he was about to leave and he could not promise himself to you, or because he was so far deep in his inner turmoil. Lo’ak felt anger bubbling in his chest. This anger wasn’t directed towards you, but himself. He cursed his inability to allow himself to fully love you because of his internal issues. No, he justified the second choice in his mind with weak reasons as to why he could not confess his love. 

If he said confessed, Lo’ak knew you would spend the rest of your days waiting for his return. If he ever returned. You deserved more than that. You deserved someone who could love you now. The prospect of you waiting for him, only for Lo’ak to stay the same Na’vi he was now, a version of himself that wasn’t proud of, haunted him. Yeah. Lo’ak framed his reasoning to focus on you, rather than himself because it made the harsh reality less painful. Damn the fact he was leaving, he would wait 100 years for you too if he confessed. The reality was Lo’ak could not confess his love because he couldn’t give his all to you, not when his judgment and self-worth were clouded by thoughts so dark that Eywa would be heartbroken to learn one of her children, whom she created with love and adoration, did not love himself. 

Either way, he was about to break your heart for the second time within days. 

“You are the other half of my soul and if there is any person who can understand me, it is you. But, I cannot love you. I’m sorry syulang.” There was a sorrowful look across Lo’ak’s face. Your body deflated at his words and the familiar sting of tears gathered in your eyes. He didn’t want to continue, but if was going to break your heart, you at least deserved a proper explanation.

“You are the most lovely and wonderful woman on this planet; the idea of you not being in my life hurts more than a palulukan attack. But I swear on my life to Eywa when I say this, but it is not you. It’s me. You have always been this positive being in my life, and I always hoped it would rub off on me and make me a better man. I thought, maybe if that ever happened, we could be together in the future. I would finally be worthy of all the love you have to offer. I am not good enough for you. I would only drag you down with the weight of my heavy problems,” Lo’ak finished.

“But it’s not your choice to decide who deserves me,” you let out with an exasperated tone. “How can you stand here in front of me and deny the bond we have? The love we have? The other day when I confessed that I see you and you ignored it, I brushed it off my shoulder because I was sure, with every fiber of my being, that you see me too. That you love me. But now you are leaving, and Eywa knows when the fuck you are coming back, and you can't even admit it out loud?” you questioned. 

“Don’t you get it? I am not doing this because I want to deny the bond we have. I feel our bond every day from the time I wake up to the time I go to sleep. Even in my dreams, you are there. Your essence is built into the foundation of my bones. I just can’t love you. No good would come of it. I’m the clan’s outcast. Yes, we are best friends and we know each other like the back of our palms. But I won't let you carry the burden of my imperfectness,” Lo’ak choked with a sob at the end. 

Without missing a beat, you tirade, “I think everything you are saying is complete bullshit. How could be absolute about something that has not been realized? We have spent the last 14 years together. I know you better than I know myself, Lo’ak. And I know you see me too, so what are you so afraid of? There is nothing that you could ever do that would scare me away from loving you. I love you for who you are–flaws and all. I notice everything about you, the good and the bad. I know you have feelings so big and nerve-wracking that you do not know how to handle them except by convincing yourself that they are true. But you cannot stand in my face and claim that this is for my own good. No, you are saying all this because you are too scared of the possibility that I might see through all that and decide that you are not worth the trouble, that every judgment the clan and your father says about you is right.”

You stepped a few feet away from Lo’ak and then turned towards the direction of the village. He hadn’t said a word since you finished your speech. Your entire back was facing Lo’ak until you turned your head over your shoulder to look back at him. The tears that pooled in your eyes began to flow like a sad waterfall that was dying, the tears slowly rolling down your stripped cheeks in an antagonizing matter. Your golden eyes stared into Lo’ak’s. He could see the hurt etched across your iris and he was sure his eyes looked just as pathetic and broken. It was a moment that would forever be engrained into Lo’ak’s memory. You opened your mouth and delivered the final blow to this already crestfallen night,

“Maybe I was wrong, maybe you don’t see me. Because if you truly did, you would know that I would not care about your weaknesses. I don’t even care about them now. I refuse to believe that you cannot love me too. You are a lot of things Lo’ak. A coward is not one of them. I’ll see you tomorrow to say goodbye.” 

And at this moment, Lo’ak knew this was the biggest of all his fuck ups. He had managed to ruin a lot of good things and moments. Never knowing when the party is over and when the business began. When it came to you, his sweet tìyawn, Lo’ak never made any serious mistakes. So why was he doing it now? Lo’ak’s eyes burned as he stared at your figure walking away from him and the future you could’ve had together. 

translations: eylan - friend, Olo’eyktan - male clan leader, tstxa'a - canalyd, kelku - home, palulukan - thanator, syulang - flower, loreyu - helocordian, skxawng - moron, Toruk Makto - toruk rider, Palulukun Makto - thanator rider, Tsahik - clan spiritual leader, Nga yawne lu oer - i love you, tsakarem - successor to the tsahik, ‘tewng - loincloth, nantang - viperwolf, paysyuls - water lily, eanean - blue plant, tanhi - bioluminescent freckle, uniltìranyu - dream walker, tìyawn - love

credits for dividers: leafs (x) green line (x)

[galadrieljones]

In regards to Varric's flagged death

- he's getting up there in years. He's reaching toward the wise old mentor trope, and those don't usually survive

- it would be a pretty emotional opening and an immediate reason to be angry with Solas/Rook - especially new players

- his writer was let go from bioware

- Varric has always been willing to let others take the spotlight, but this time, he put himself in the most dangerous position possible to try to talk Solas down while Rook ran the slidelines.

And then there's this:

https://www.tumblr.com/corseque/753195522694774784/im-sorry-if-other-people-saw-this-already-but-i?source=share

Hmm, yes. I saw that post, and I reblogged. Just playing friendly Devil's Advocate here. I think most of this is interpretive. Killing off a "wise old mentor" takes a while longer. Varric hasn't really been a wise old mentor. I don't recall that really as his role at all in Inquisition. He's terribly reluctant, in fact, to be there. Plus, he's what, like fifty? Maybe I'm old, but that is not that old lol. And even if he is a "wise old mentor," wise old mentors, like Obi-Wan Kenobi, or Hershel Greene from The Walking Dead, typically die as self-sacrifices after having completed their narrative purpose in a truly meaningful way. That is not what's going on here with Varric. If he's just getting stabbed by Solas, then like, that's not meaningful at all.

Also, the writers really don't need a reason to rally us against Solas. If a player is so new that they don't know Solas, then they don't know Varric either, so killing him off would be largely meaningless to them and instead would just alienate older, more loyal players. Killing Varric in the first scene would feel very "The Last of Us 2" in that it would seem to serve no real purpose other than to create moral hardship for the player, in a way that has no connection to their choices. That's not really Bioware's style.

The writers have also expressed a lot of sympathy toward Solas. Why would they have Solas stab Varric?? Even if Solas was so far gone, he's just killing everyone left and right (the trailer doesn't communicate this at all, btw), why would Solas stab anyone with a knife? Solas can kill people with his eyeball lasers. We've seen it.

I suppose that if Varric dies, and it's an accident, then that is different; however, this would, I feel, betray his character in a way that would greatly disappoint me and many others. His writer being laid off is also not really a reason to assume they'd kill the character she wrote, too. If anything, I would think they'd try to preserve his integrity, unless we think they're just sadists, and if we do, why are we playing their games?? Maybe it's wishful thinking, and possibly it is, but killing a beloved OG like Varric on day one, with the player having zero choice in the matter, just to piss people off and also because Varric is getting a little "old" is illogical. It would, I think, betray their tendencies up until now. If it happens, it's probably a bad choice. Just my two cents, of course!

[silversatin2105]

hi sissy i would like to request scenario for Chifuyu with a S/O who wants to cuddle him but is too shy to initiate thank you so much

Hi

Yeah I can do that and I apologize for the late reply I’ve had a touch of writers block in the form of being stressed out and im only now getting back on track, thank you for the ask and let’s get into it.

Trigger warnings:

.Anxiety

.Depression

.low-self esteem

.Angst before the comfort

“Please hold me even when I am scared ”

Chifuyu X Shy hugged starved reader:

You were going though a lot and were overwhelmed by everything and its true that you and Chifuyu were now dating but you still felt shy around the vice commander of the first division of Toman, not only because they were a biker gang but because he himself was the perfect gentlemen to you, all that attention still overwhelmed you as you were still getting used to going steady with him.

So the idea of asking for a physical connection in the form of a cuddle was in your mind strictly a no go situation, but you couldn’t help it, you yearned for the comfort of his arms, to feel loved and wanted but in your mind you felt like you would only bother him so you held back and bottled up your feelings.

It didn’t take Chifuyu long to notice that you were distant to him, he worried that it was something he did, He felt at a loss as you stopped asking for help with things, you also ghosted him unintentionally as you felt like dealing with this issue on your own and on one fine day in summer he decided enough was enough that he’d ask you what was wrong.

“Y/N I want to ask you something?” Chifuyu asked as you both ate instant yakisoba in a park in Shibuya, as he did you felt your heart jump a thousand steps, you were worried that this was it, that your oddities had finally driven him away and with held back tears you turned to look at him with that false smile you had come accustomed to using around him, the mask you wore around him so to speak.

“Y-yes Chifuyu” you asked as you held your chest with words too hard to speak forming in your mind as the blonde delinquent looked at you with the concerned look in his green eyes.

“I was just wondered … was there anything troubling you ?” Chifuyu asked leaving you with a confused look, it wasn’t a break up he was worried for your wellbeing  and with you being caught off guard your eyes welled with tears as you admitted to him that all wasn’t well, that both school life and home life were leaving you ran dry, you admitted to him that you were too shy to to ask for help as to you this was normal, you’d take the weight of the world and not ask for anything in return.

“Im so sorry…im so sorry Chifuyu…I tired to not let this happen !” yoy spoke out in your spoke out in your tear filled rant as you finally admitted your truth to him, you expected him to blow off your feelings like those in the past did but he didn’t with one swift motion your head was buried into his chest, you felt warmth and love as he stroked your (insert colour) hair, you felt the gentle beat of his heart as he comforted you in your time of need and within no time you were sleeping in his arms for the first time in two months you felt safe to do so, when you woke up he was carrying you back to his bike.

“Hey do you feel any better ?” He asked you as you nodded and buried your head into his back, he spoke is a calm voice on how you were not alone that now things were different, that you had your friends in Toman, granted they were an idiosyncratic bunch but as a whole they protected their own and most importantly he told you that you have him and you could come to him with anything that bothered you.

In that moment you got bold enough to ask for a simple favour.

“Please hold me, even when I am scared”

END SCENE  

Warning:

Please do not remove original tags in Re-blogs, don’t re-post anywhere else or alter the original work.

[queenvhagar]

While I can understand people being frustrated with Alicent’s writing this season, I do have to admit that some people seem to take it a little bit too far. Like I literally had to leave the green Reddit because people were being straight up nasty towards Alicent.

So people can still enjoy Aegon and Aemond despite the shit writing they’ve been given but fans aren’t allowed to like Alicent anymore? Again, I understand people not being happy with the writing for Alicent (trust me im pissed too) but idk some of things said makes me uncomfortable.

I don’t know, I feel like as an alicent fan (and even as an alicole shipper) the fandom just feels… less inviting know, ya know? I now just enjoy her S1 and book characterization but seeing how much hate Alicent is getting honestly makes me both sad and mad cause it means that Ryan Condal making her a rage bait this season essentially worked.

Sorry if im bothering you, i just needed to vent to someone😅

Her writing this entire season has definitely just been rage bait and it's working for both her critics and her fans.

For me, it's just completely turned me away from the show, and particularly the Dragonstone scene in the finale is the last straw in terms of her character being completely ruined. This writing choice has made her objectively one of the most pathetic and despicable characters in my opinion in ways that the real Alicent is not. I've kind of separated her characterization this season and particularly the finale, which is ultimately rage-inducing and worthy of criticism, from her real character that exists in the books and was hinted at in moments in season 1.

Her show character is not something I can enjoy at all post-Dragonstone, and while the character assassination has been strong for show Aemond and show Aegon (and all the other Greens), it has yet to be so completely illogical that it absolutely breaks the story and character and the role they play in the story. So this might be where other people are coming from when they say they can be fans of other Greens but not Alicent anymore.

I'm just checked out and can't even go along with the idea that any version of Alicent would do what she does because it goes completely against everything essential to her character. If I was still able to have immersion in the story and the ability to try to think through or justify her choices and motivation or find any connection or coherency in her character change over time, I might have more to say about her, but that's gone for me. It is just so transparent what the writers are trying to do with her, the Greens, and the Blacks that I no longer have any buy-in with this show as something that feasibly could exist in-universe. It's like I can see the writers manipulating and changing the story so strongly to fit their specific vision in every scene that I can't even view the story or characters independently from that anymore.

So yeah, I'm not a show Alicent fan anymore (nor am I a show fan after this). But book Alicent will always be supreme. That's the real Alicent. And I prefer the book versions of basically every other character as well.

I suppose people can still be a fan of show Alicent and try to justify her choices, but it definitely will continue to get harder and harder to defend her because the writers are clearly and so transparently determined to completely humiliate and butcher her character to uplift Rhaenyra and fans will be continue to be critical of her because of this targeted writing, unfortunately.

And the sad result is the fandom will just get more toxic ��� take care out there and definitely feel free to avoid spaces that are getting too hostile or leaning into the misogynistic hate that the writers are inviting fans to direct at Alicent through their misogynistic writing.

[larrythefloridaman]

Hmm. Peppermint for bingo

the thing with peppermint is there are kind of two peppermints to me?

pre-nccts peppermint as-voiced-by-katie is a being so fascinatingly, hilariously, suffocatingly rancid that i felt the need to take a breather at one point when the streams originally aired and still wince going back to her scenes, an erratic obsessive creep armchair psychologist writer and masochist on a constant dizzying sugar high who happily rejects all adherence to social contract in devotion to an evil god she's actively stalking who wants nothing to do with her in pursuit of an escapist fantasy she's projected onto him. (red candy)

nccts peppermint as-written-by-ryan is a particularly unstable cringe sad wet newly crowned old god in a box all alone with abrasive and obsessive tendencies over shipping, fandom drama and her own opinions about character writing to the detriment of her ability to engage positively with the 'real world' (Relatively Speaking) outside of those lenses, her derealization and her tendency to treat other people as fictional objects to project her desires onto in violation of their boundaries only being worsened by Prism's enabling of that mindset and her possessive and obsessive desire for a tooth-rotting archie-andrews ass romantic fantasy with Crimson, but she's observant and sharp and self-assured enough to stand her ground when she realizes she's being manipulated with the promise of companionship and to not waver in her conviction that Prism is wrong. (green candy)

these arent at all incompatible, in fact they read to me as two parts, almost two perspectives, of one greater whole, but they are pretty noticeably distinct in their focus execution and tone, i think?

she's still a creep, but ryan doesn't always sell it as hard or as strongly as katie did, often leaning on common (and thus usually less shocking and by extension less effective due to not hitting as hard) 'unpredictable viscerally lonely yandere' trope stuff. Or maybe the written medium just dampens its effect- hard to explain what specifically makes katie's pep character voice so Offputting, i cant imagine it's easy trying to translate it into text without losing some of its offensive punch when you lose the element of vocal delivery, im not sure how id do it. Havent gotten to the most potent ncct pep stuff in the reread we've been doing yet, my opinions' subject to change, maybe shes worse than i remember, lol

if peppermint's character premise is summarized and boiled down to the absolute basics as 'creepy and obsessive parasocial fan of the sport' then katie put the emphasis on 'creepy' and 'obsessive' and ryan put the emphasis on 'parasocial fan of the sport' to better use her as a character that reflects the concept of fandom and position her as being on the side of characterization over strict narrative structures and expectations for the nccts' metanarrative thematic purposes, you get what i mean?

marking 'couldve been a great character if handled differently' is admittedly kind of misleading when what i really mean is 'i hope these takes on her character maybe get synthesized a little more going forward now that prism's arc villain era in the nccts is effectively over and the narrative actively problematizes her violative and antisocial behavior more again because shes less interesting to me when its treated as inconsequential in the grand scheme of things as it kind of mostly is after ncct2, and that her loneliness and the roots of how she is and why are explored more.' alas the bingo board is written in past tense. None of this is a criticism really just kinda observations of the disconnect that sometimes comes into play when a character is really Made by their voice actor in a way thats sorta lost in translation to another medium and to the hands of another writer with different goals.

All this being said, i like her! In a show about identity and connection and our responsibilities to ourselves and eachother when living in community with others, a character defined by loneliness, disconnecting from other people and their own reality and sinking deeply enough into themself and their eccentricities and what little they DO find connection through to the point of lacking consideration for others' existence as full, real people, reducing them to picking them apart as though theyre storytelling tools, trying and struggling by navigating the world around her as though its the fiction she loves with no REAL consequences, until she upset someone badly enough to be forced to consider them as a real person with feelings (relative to her as. Also A Fictional Character,) is a really interesting character concept for a metanarrative arc of the show, and her being manipulated by the godly 'author' into being her lackey through a sense of companionship and enabling that perspective on the world by letting her in on the in-universe Cosmic Secret that their world IS a fiction to someone, us, the audience... its pretty fascinating, especially because she only falls for the lie in it for so long. It does matter. It may not be real, but it does matter. And she took us believing in her so close to heart...

[bird-lettuce]

hello! i’m looking to get into blue beetle and was wondering if you could tell me about him? what’s he like as a person and superhero and stuff

thank you!

helloo!!! sorry for taking so long!!! you've come to the right place!!!!

(please bear with me, english is not my first language)

first, here's a reading list im working on! it's still very much a wip but it covers most his more prominent apperances (you can check my pinned post for a link to a spreadsheet that has more apperances if you want background/cameos) https://jaime-reyes-archive.carrd.co/#guide-eng

If you want the best intro to him as a character you should read his first book from 2006. It falls off a bit at the end with the writer change imo but the rest it absolutely fantastic and what made me love the character so much! A follow-up to that would be Blue Beetle: Graduation Day, his most recent mini.

Here's an abridged description of his character, more other media you watch him on and my thoughts about his different media and comic characterizations. Buckle up! We have a long way to go. I'll try not to spoil the first run too much:

Jaime Reyes is a a mexican-american teenager (15/16 in his first run, 17/18 in his most recent mini), son of mexican immigrants who lives in El Paso, Texas. He became the third Blue Beetle after Khaji Da, the scarab that belonged to the first Beetle, Dan Garrett, latches onto his spine overnight. He was scared and rejected his power at first, looking for ways to get rid of the scarab, who is capable of communicating with him in his head. Through some mentoring from more experienced characters and communication with the scarab they grow to think of each other as friends and brothers. (highlight: bb06 book one & #25)

Jaime's most important trait is his deep connection to his family and community, notably not keeping his identity as a hero secret from his family and close friends. He is constantly aided and supported by them in his journey to becoming a superhero. (highlight: bb06#1-7, 16, 17, 25-26)

He is a normal teen who was suddenly given powers, so a constant theme is the nervousness and stress he has about the amount of responsibility and expectations he was suddenly given. He tries to do right by his family and community, choosing to dialogue with any possible foe before attacking, and prioritizes the security of the people he protects over his reputation or being on the good side of other leaguers or authorities. Personality wise, he has a very light spirit, and a good sense of humor, he regularly jokes around while fighting. He is good-natured and often silly. (highlight: bb06#17, blue beetle: Graduation Day, Justice League Action)

As a hero, he is the wielder of a potentially world-domination weapon that has enough power to rival that of a green lantern (bb06#1), multiple teen titans, producing synthetic kryptonite (bb06#18), tracking people, protecting him from falling from the atmosphere (bb06#1), hacking batman's computers (the secret six storyline), producing a wide range of weapons, flying, a type of dimension-jumping (bb06#25), etc. The world is lucky that Khaji Da is in the hands of a good kid.

In his original story, he had no relationship with the other Beetles, being mentored by an array of different heroes. After Rebirth, though, he and Ted Kord were often written as a team, either as a duo or through ocasional teamups. It is important to say, however, that Jaime's growth as a hero was more impacted by his family, friends and mentors than it was by Ted. He is self-made and has a separate legacy from the other two Blue Beetles that should not be discredited. Their stories have been separate more than they have not, and recently there has been a subtle push to recognize Jaime as the current main Beetle, and Ted as someone whose time in the spotlight has passed, as opposed to having both of them as The Blue Beetles. (Blue and Gold #7, Blue Beetle: Graduation Day)

Notable relationships:

Paco and Brenda, his best friends

Khaji Da, the scarab. His brother and half of the Blue Beetle

Milagro, Brenda and Alberto, his sister and parents

The posee and La Dama, first rivals, then close allies in his community

Hector and Nadia, the people he trusts the most and the team's tech experts

Peacemaker, Guy Gardner and Starfire, his most notable mentors

Batman, who has gone out of his way to spend a lot of money on him and his family without them knowing lol. Compensation for certain wrong choices I'd say.

The JLI, legacy allies. Especially Booster Gold.

The Reach, his main antagonists. Creators of Khaji Da

Other media

Batman: The brave and the bold: Jaime has a lot of remarkable appearances in BATB! He's literally in the first episode lol. I love his characterization and his dynamic with Batman, and the approach to Jaime's relationship with Ted Kord. His origin story isn't the same, but a lot of characters' stories were changed to be more Batman-centric so i don't really mind. He is also one of the main characters in the Wii game, and his banter with batman is really fun. Definitely one of my favorites

Justice League Action: a more light-hearted version of him! Really fun and the design is very cute imo. Also has some funny banter with Batman

Young Justice: the second season has The Reach as main villains, so Jaime is pretty prominent. He doesn't appear much after that though. It's not exactly my favorite adaptation but it introduced a lot of people to him so it's notable.

The dc animated movie universe: not that interesting lol he's mostly a bg character.

NOTES ON HIS COMICS

The Blue Beetle 2006 run by Lilah Sturges tries to tackle an immigration storyline, but does so poorly and has a very important main character siding with right wingers. The final issue has a couple of upsetting endings for some beloved characters. It starts after #30 and ends the book.

New 52 is awful. Awful. Changed his origin, his relationship with almost everybody, gave him a weird running joke with the scarab and a lot of the dialogue and characterization choices come off as insaaaanely xenophobic, racist and classist. Also all of it was retconned so it's not even worth reading.

Rebirth was written by Giffen and had Ted Kord back as a mc. Also changed the scarab's origin from tech to magic. Not a favorite of mine, a lot of it is based around Giffen's humor, which i never really connected with, and the dynamic between Jaime and Ted can get annoying after a while. I've noticed it's still enjoyed by a lot of people and only had 16 issues, so you should probably give it a try and see for yourself.

Blue Beetle: Graduation Day is very good. Probably his best book since his first run. It's just about to end, the final issue comes out next week. It's just a mini so it can feel like it was missing more issues to fully flesh out what it wanted to do, but it honestly is refreshing to have Jaime's family and cast back. Also introduced a new city, a new armor and a lot of new characters!! I highly recommend it

This is all I can think of without going into extremely detailed analysis and breakdowns of every little bit of content he has had over the years!! I hope it's understandable and helps guide you into this beloved character <3 He's absolutely one if not my favorite DC character, and means a lot to me. If you have any questions or would like me to clarify about anything I'd be more than happy to answer!!

[hotpinkstaples]

Sorry, I'm a little out of the loop, Jon is supposed to marry a Zod? What's that about

dfgjhdfgjsf you didn't miss much 😂😂

long story short, bendisboot's mon el is a descendant of jon kent and a zod. i made jokes that jon married lor to make mon el, bringing the chris kent connection full circle by having lor rejoin the kents through marriage instead of adoption. it was mostly in jest, but im not entirely insane, and one writer at CBR caught it too, but deemed it highly unlikely, but maybe five people on god's green earth believe jon + lor = mon. im the most vocal.

BUT THEN JOE CASEY HAPPENED! he got ursa pregante with zod's second child, and to the misfortune of jon kent/girl!zod shippers, it is NOT a girlbaby. it is a boybaby. considering ursa's death flags are popping up, it is unlikely she and zod will make a THIRD zod in time for jon to be to able to have a reasonable relationship with a zod progeny without it coming off hecking weird. so by virtue of casey either a) forgot/doesn't care what bendis wrote, or b) absolutely is running home with jon + lor = mon, because unfortunately, the only viable zod candidate to reproduce with jon is lor. yes i know they are both amabs. no, i do not think it matters because if there is a zod, there is a way. thank you for coming to my ted talk.

[glngrbred]

On inherent stories and worldbuilding

OK so the title is pretentios but you looked at it right? cool

I legitimately would realy apreciate it if you read or loosely read this, this project is very important to me and I've worked alot on it. Thank you for reading at all, go drink some water, love u <3

anyways, Im making a cardgame right now, like MTG but hopefully monotized in a more ethical way. like, as a 1 time purchase or subscription.

So, In my game there is a very heavy emphasis on ecology, and it is basically explicitly environmentalist propoganda, that's not the point tho, what we are trying to do initially is trick people into thinking about environmental issues with cool worldbuilding. And on that worldbuilding, as lead desiner/writer person, I think I can actually share some pretty good tips.

Some quick background, not super important. In our wold there a 4 color identities, wich is both for gameplay (mtg inspired) and lore (also mtg inspired) Red, white(yellow), Green, black(purple), for each of wich is a place on an alighnment chart and teirs within the factions represented by these colors. again, like MTG

On that topic, of the factions and identities these card colors and gameplay elements represent, I have some tips for Dms and other worldbuilders.

My main thing, Is inherrent stories (built in stories).

As an example,

The Orks in my world are reptilian hominids obsessed with fire. As a starting point my desire was to do a new type of Ork, where we maintain the motif of chaos alighned "Monsters" who's actions serve the bad guys, like in WoW or LotR. from there I knew that my red faction was fire themed, but building up this concept was kinda hard for me. I didn't really know hoe to start with meeting this desire while subverting the typical Ork tropes.

So I decided to take the aproach of working from first my desire to have a fire ascociation. I Already had a theme of the main humanoids in my world being ascociated or related to specific animal groups, Goblins have similarity to anteaters, elves bees, and Dorvs beetles and grubs. So I knew the first step in my Orls was going to be Making them some sort of animal.

And i had a good think on that, you know I landed on reptiles. wich seem obvious in hindsight, but at the time I was very excited about this, since it meant there was already a clear connection to be made with fire. since most reptiles cannot regulate heat on their own, a connection to the sun and fire is very easy to make. Especially for a hominid species. Already we have a peice of a narrative, Orks love Fire because they need it to survive cold days. Wonderful, now how do we get that ascociation to chaos and subvert the typical barbaric Orks trope?

My first thought was inspired by Warhammer greenskins, wich isn't super subvertive, just giving orks big techy robots doesn't do much to change the ascociation with brutish methods and uncivilized nature. I knew I wanted to make the Orks more equal intelectually with my other factions, instead of having them be the mindless other bent on chaos. So the step after "Ork like fire" turned out to be their philosophy

What I ended up going for was in my opinion pretty original,

Orks, Due to their reliance on Fire, developed a culture and Philosophy built on the nurturing of "Warmth." Warmth takes many fors for the Orks, they find it in Art, Music, magic, and love. Family and play and Food, and even war. Where the Orkish philosophy deteriorates as a method of governance it the often single minded focus on what makes an individual feel good, and forgetting that other people, even those that don't seek warmth, have needs and desires too. By creating this intrinsic societal issue, where governance ends up focusing on how to make one's tribe as warm as possible, we can create narratives about how desperate poorer comunites are for warmth, how creative they get, and how even bad, and evil deeds can be seen as a positive as long as they bring warmth to your tribe.

We can have wars and espionage and gatherings and beutiful ronmances all built around this pervasive desire for individual pleasure. And we can have stories form when an Ork realizes that the Goblins they've hurt also want good things, and how the Orks realize that their selfish behavior makes the world less warm for everyone. We can have stories about nurturing empathy in a selfish society, and stories about becoming closer to one another, of seperating one's self from those who use them and hurt them.

Also, with this narrative, Orks turn into warbands of bards, preists, and mages, keen on nurturing warmth and helping their ingroup. WHOA we just subverted the barbarian ork trope didnt we? HORRAY ALL OF OUR GOALS HAVE BEEN FULFILLED BY ONE DESCISION SPIRALLING!

Of course perscribing concepts and personality to individual characters based off of their race is a horrible thing to do. but for a group it's very usefull to narrow down concrete adjectives and emotions that are associated with your societies and cultures.

My Advice to you, is try to find your Ork bards, but don;t start there. Think about how society would form around the 4 legged Praying mantis men your story is about, and how different a society could be based off of the physiological environment your characters exist in.

My second peice fo advice, Is that If you want to make a specific type of civilization, As an example, hive cities (like warhammer), try to think about what typre of culture would develope that city? who would live in the underwater Utopia, who would work in the sugar mines, and why do the sugar mines exist? I know It can be increadably difficult to find an angle to take your worldbuilding, so start with 1 small descision, an easy one, like "Do I want my orks to be colorful?" Answer that, then build from there.

final note, Yes, this is an extremely long post, and thank you for reading it,

also ...

👌

I, ME, HAS gotten you HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA *evil gnome voice* You hAVe but THIRTY MINUTES to get someone else before you ARE IT for the rest of your life MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[nonbinarylesbianherb]

Here’s the thing Alicent Hightower wasn’t a victim, the HotD writers chose to make her one.

She got married at 18 to a 29 year old, she had her first kid when she was around 20. She had so much political influence at court she was able to create her own faction, run her stepdaughter out of Kingslanding and stop her husband from making his daughter Hand. Want to know what she did when her husband died? She left his corpse to rot whilst she and Criston took control of the Green Council to crown Aegon.

So why did the writers turn around and make her a child bride who is reduced to nothing more than a 24/7 victim?

She is disrespected and humiliated at every turn, we are told constantly Alicent Hightower is a coward who isn’t deserving of respect. The writers have a very clear vendetta against her, punishing her for having the audacity of being against Rhaenyra and I feel her nonstop victimisation is part of it.

It’s because her victimisation was done solely to punish her that Viserys’ actions are so whitewashed in the show. It’s why Hess claims Dyana is the only rape victim. It’s why the writers’ only intention with 2x08 was to remind the audience that Rhaenyra is 100x better than Alicent in every way possible whether it be as a Queen/politician/mother/ruler/leader etc.

I’m gonna be really honest i don’t really feel strongly about book alicent in the way i do show (will come back to this), i know young alicent doesn’t exist in the book, but she was the first alicent i was introduced to and ive attached to her specifically. I know there’s a significant difference between book/show alicent adult version, let alone young alicent who we don’t even see in the books.

I think definitely though the show writers could’ve done a better job for older alicent. young alicent being an addition of the show was interesting and they could’ve built off that for an addition to older alicent’s character (without erasing the core of what her character is from the books) for more potential plots/ characterisation- (similar to how rhaenyra and alicent’s ex friendship is a main key of the show) because these added plots were expected, as with most book to show adaptations - but I’d even say necessary since the book is written specifically to be a historic novel more than the storytelling we’d usually see with other asoiaf books. Obviously for the show we’re gonna need to know the ins and outs of characters and relationships, we’re going to want in-depth introductions and characterisation, so I understand why they’d need to create plots to build off of to add opportunities - but there are ways to do that without completely changing a character (or erasing them, cough maelor, cough)

They couldve still shown this powerful and cunning woman from the books whilst also having scenes portraying how her trauma has affected her, how her old friendship with rhaenyra weighs on her- etc. I think they were doing that well in s1, but s2 is kind of a downer for both the character of alicent (as we know there was a lot of upset/shock/confusion with the seeming 180 her character did in s2) and rhaenicent (not as a ship necessarily but as a main factor and concept of the show)

I think something as well is the show / writers have always angled for a more team black approach - and team black as the “good vs bad” , but no side is good or bad in this war, it’s main victims are the small folk, who suffer the cruelty of two opposing powers , the destruction and death this war will have will never have been worth it - it doesn’t matter what side is what. I highly doubt the books portrayed this retelling of this war with a preference that you tend to see in the show - which coming back to my thing about book alicent, I haven’t read fire and blood lol (so it’s easier for me to connect to the first alicent i was introduced to, especially one we see into her life/character rather than the historical way im assuming f&b retells her story- , also being mentally ill and connecting with the character of young alicent/show alicent in a mentally ill way LOL) but I know a lot of what happens/differences. I agree with what you said about them trying to make rhaenyra/team black seem better than alicent/team green and it ends up undercutting alicent as a character because the idea to paint her more as a villain - as well as hurting rhaenyra’s character too ykwim? Again haven’t read the books but i KNOW rhaenyra IS cruel, does do bad things, is selfish, etc, and that’s great! good for her, but she should be allowed to be terrible without it being because she was ‘pushed to the edge’ or ‘justified’ etc. we are starting to see more of her cruelty and hopefully it’ll start to show that both sides are bad, both sides can be cruel just for the sake of being cruel, there is no underlying reason or justification maybe they’re all just terrible

anyway i think im done yapping, not even sure what i was yapping tbh hopefully it makes a modicum of sense. sorry for not always replying to these anon things sometimes i’m simply too tired or i begin to yap, get busy/distracted/tired, so i draft it and then i forget to finish 😭 have a good day anonymous person on the internet i yapped to

[batemanofficial]

ok re: my last reblog about tumblr shows™ im not done complaining. i think a big problem with the way the tumblr populace interacts with television is that people on here don't watch media that's not produced to high heaven. good omens and our flag means death are very high budget projects that have a lot of big names attached, both in front of and behind the camera - which is fine; of course people are going to watch big budget shows, that's kind of the whole point of producing them - but they get treated like these underground hits produced by, for, and about marginalized groups and like...they're not. they're on prime video and hbo max, which aren't exactly obscure and certainly aren't known for their delicate and authentic handling of queer issues.

but these shows (and the ones that came before them, bbc sherlock comes to mind) get consumed by people on here looking for authentic representation, and through the game of cultural telephone that often gets played in online communities, become stripped for parts and re-molded into bodies of rhetoric that get interpreted as foundational texts for the queer politics of gen z. i'm not saying it's bad to want representation or identify with the representation you find in high-budget projects, i'm just saying that these shows aren't designed to cater to the tastes and wants of queer gen z-ers, they're designed to turn a profit by generating as much viewership as possible, and if that includes queer gen z-ers, then so be it.

the audience of a show is, in a studio's mind, really only a means to profit. i think that's also why a lot of these shows get torn to shreds for not handling representational issues quote-unquote "correctly" - the producers behind shows like stranger things, for instance, are only worried about how people might interpret a shipping dynamic insofar as it drives viewership. they've danced around will's sexuality as a plot point for four seasons because they know the "will-he-won't-he" dynamic is something that draws people to the show and keeps them coming back when new seasons drop. they're not concerned with how authentic or inauthentic their portrayals of the queer experience might be, no matter how that makes people who are looking for authenticity feel. producers want to make these shows appealing to as many potential viewers as possible, and that often unfortunately means toning down tangible queer subtext and making it more nebulous, so they can have plausible deniability if culture shifts to the point where on-screen queer representation isn't en vogue.

to that end, i think a lot of people who enjoy shows like gomens, ofmd, or stranger things but who become frustrated with how these shows handle queeer issues might benefit from watching lower-budget projects that prioritize story and earnestness over profit potential. even older films like fried green tomatoes or the birdcage do a better job, at least in my opinion, of portraying authentic queer experiences than lots of modern big-studio projects. even though the lesbian dynamics in fried green tomatoes aren't ever outright delineated as a queer story, it's clear that the element of queer subtext was important to the writers, which makes it resonate as that much more authentic.

anyway, what i'm trying to say is that there are queer writers out there who want to share their stories with you, but are pushed out in favor of larger-scale projects that are surer financial bets. but these stories are out there - it's just up to you to put in the effort to find them. putting in that effort can be incredibly rewarding, and it's really heartwarming to be able to know you're connecting with other people like you through honest portrayals of the lives you lead. and, inconvenient as it is, you're not going to get that from amazon.

[majjale]

Ive been meaning to ask you forever but every once in a while i find myself returning to your ao3 works (even though im not into mha anymore) and id like to know if you make and post content outside of it, as well as book recomendations you might have? What made you the writer you are?

hey, that's high praise!! thank you for enjoying them!! tragically i haven't done any formal writing outside of it in a while, so it's still the only place you'll find my work!

as for book recommendations, it depends on the stuff you like to read. i'm really partial to fantasy, sci-fi, and the supernatural, so i usually recommend The Magicians by Lev Grossman (the books not the show hehe), tumblr favorite Gideon the Ninth/The Locked Tomb series, and plenty of things my friends have in turn recommended to me, like several of the works by V. E. Schwab and Brandon Sanderson. i haven't been reading as much lately and am trying to get back into it so i welcome recs too!!

as for what made me the writer i am... that'd be my family. i was brought up surrounded by books, raised by communication professors and theatre kids, and am enamored with the connection between prose and lyric. if you don't mind a few more book recs, if you'd like to see the ones i credit with truly developing my passion for words, check out The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster and The Neverending Story by Michael Ende (red and green print version). i read them when i was VERY small and they fundamentally shaped my style!

thank you so much for liking my work, and happy reading !!

[elysianavenue]

songs that remind me of genshin characters

aether: soldier, poet, king - the oh hellos (venti clearly sings it for him duh)

lumine: two birds - regina spektor (it's about her and her bro (':)

amber: touch the sky - julie fowlis (please it s c r e a m s amber)

kaeya: iris - the goo goo dolls (ik it's a romance song but i lowkey picture him singing it to his bro im sorry)

lisa: dangerous woman - ariana grande (need i say more?)

barbara: sisters - radical face (give this girl a sister of the year award rn)

razor: on melancholy hill - gorillaz (he was raised by wolves)

xiangling: what baking can do - jessie mueller (she cooks lmao?)

beidou: wellerman - nathan evans (she's a pirate it makes sense ok)

xingqiu: paperback writer - the beatles (mans writes fanfiction cmon)

ningguang: national anthem - lana del rey (i'll tell you you're my national anthem mommy)

fischl: control - halsey (i can't explain this one it makes sense to me tho)

bennett: world's smallest violin - ajr (he definitely will blow up into smithereens at some point)

noelle: teenage dirtbag - wheatus (HER NAME IS NOELLE-)

chongyun: lemon boy - cavetown (chongyun is robbie and xingqiu is lemon boy oop-)

sucrose: rät - penelope scott (i honestly just hear her voice lol)

jean: oh no! - marina (she do be after success)

diluc: alive - khalid (daddy issues by the neighbourhood was too obvious)

qiqi: the blue wrath - i monster (again, it's one of those songs i hear and homegirl comes to mind)

mona: a sky full of stars - coldplay (her entire personality is astrology sorry)

keqing: unworthy - vancouver sleep clinic (this one might only make sense to me so i won't bother explaining it)

venti: golden slumbers - the beatles (ducky told me to put this one for venti)

klee: wrecking ball - mother mother (this should make the most sense, damn little menace)

diona: my alcoholic friends - the dresden dolls (no one hates alcohol more than this girl)

tartaglia: cherry bomb - the runaways (he deadass listens to this on repeat, prove me wrong)

xinyan: i love rock n roll - joan jett & the blackhearts (self explanatory)

zhongli: good riddance - green day (ducky also told me to add this song)

albedo: the moon will sing - the crane wives (wasn't he abracadabraed into existence or something? lmao)

ganyu: brutal - olivia rodrigo (it's ok ganyu)

xiao: can you feel my heart - bring me the horizon (lil emo boy)

hu tao: dead! - my chemical romance (im convinced she'd commit homicide to keep the funeral parlor in business SORRY LMAO I LOVE HER I PROMISE)

rosaria: take me to church - hozier (she makes me wanna go to church oop-)

yanfei: cool kids - echosmith (little nerdy lawyer chick you're cool trust)

eula: who is she ? - i monster (fr tho who is she)

kazuha: softcore - the neighbourhood (this should make sense to everyone no excuses)

ayaka: reflection - lea salonga (YOU ARE THE PERFECT DAUGHTER BB)

sayu: dreamy night - lilypichu (SHE'S LITERALLY THE VOICE ACTRESS AND IT FITS SAYU SO WELL COME ON)

yoimiya: firework - katy perry (do i need to explain?)

sara: i'll make a man out of you - donny osmond (show me what dreams are made of general kujou)

raiden: you should see me in a crown - billie eilish (she's my queen who can step on me any day)

kokomi: gilded lily - cults (it can't be easy being a high priestess :()

thoma: rainbow connection - weezer, hayley williams (specifically this version)

gorou: soldier - fleurie, tommee profitt (another self explanatory one)

itto: seven nation army - the white stripes (it's just him singing honestly)

yun jin: treacherous doctor - wallows (it makes sense after her hangout event)

shenhe: graceland too - phoebe bridgers (another i think it only makes sense to me)

yae miko: bubblegum bitch - marina (mommy-)

ayato: son - sleeping at last (he do be a son)

yelan: don't threaten me with a good time - panic! at the disco (MOMMY-)

shinobu: anklebiters - paramore (her singing to the gang)

heizou: hayloft II - mother mother (this one is more based off a headcanon)

collei: sweet hibiscus tea - penelope scott (give this girl a hug rn)

tighnari: marigolds - early eyes (my fav botany connoisseur<3)

dori: million dollar bills - lorde (stingier than mihoyo)

candace: ancient dreams in a modern land - marina (just listen to it. candace.)

cyno: the other side of paradise - glass animals (i just hear him singing it. it was originally poker face by lady gaga LOL)

nilou: footloose - kenny loggins (nilou is basically bella thorne in her shake it up era no disrespect)

nahida: fireflies - owl city (another it just makes sense to me but also i highkey imagine her jamming out to this and scara is like ???)

layla: tired - beabadoobee (get some sleep girl you deserve it)

faruzan: people i don't like - upsahl (oh she very clearly doesn't like a lot of people)

wanderer (scaramouche): i would hate me too - tx2 (HE WOULD SO SING THIS THAT LITTLE EMO ASSHOLE. an honorable mention would be emo legendary by the voice of scaradouche himself, patrick pedraza)

yaoyao: honey - derivakat (ik the song was aimed at tubbo but come on yaoyao gives this vibe as well)

alhaitham: saint bernard - lincoln (the biggest alhaitham vibe ever don't tell me otherwise)

dehya: team - lorde (*cough* mommy *cough*)

mika: scrawny - wallows (lil stinker)

kaveh: no surprises - radiohead (alhaitham if you won't give him a hug then i will)

baizhu: body - mother mother (just do his story quest)

kirara: hello kitty - avril lavigne (...self explanatory...)

lynette: tourner dans le vide - indila (okay yes a romance song but if you squint it's just about a girl who would do anything for a male she loves and in this case lynette is someone who would do anything for her brother whom she loves)

lyney: mad hatter - melanie martinez (seriously. do i need to explain this one.)

freminet: rises the moon - liana flores (my actual favorite character of all time)

neuvillette: ocean eyes - billie eilish (mans is hydro man with pretty blue eyes i had to pick this one im sorry)

wriothesley: wires - the neighbourhood (THIS MAN HAS ME ON A FUCKING LEASH. ahem. sorry im gonna go touch grass right now and call my therapist.)

charlotte: watch what happens - kara lindsay (god i love it when things just make sense)

furina: the ballad of mona lisa - panic! at the disco (you're really gonna look at me and tell me that i'm wrong?)

this is the playlist on spotify 👇

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5puQ0xhZv1MrwZ8TyAMkde?si=6wlgE48iTtGH-V_Ld19DfA

[the-feral-gremlin]

15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 23, 24, 25 from the fixed ask game for john diggle (arrow)

i know its a lot im sorry T.T

Hii anon! Sorry it took so long for me to answer. And it’s totally okay I love answering asks!!

15. What's your favorite ship for this character? (Doesn't matter if it's canon or not.)

Dyla (dig and Lyla.) they couldn’t love each other outside the battlefield so they separated, they

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character?

I don’t really have one?? I’m a multishipper so it’s kind of hard to choose which one is my least favorite. Though I think that they shouldn’t have rushed to get Diggle together with Lyla so soon. Not like “give Diggle more love interests/pairings” (though I wouldn’t have been mad if we got that) but just let him be single WITHOUT a crush or anything if that makes sense.

17. What's a ship for this character you don't hate but it's not your favorite that you're fine with?

Read above ^^

18. How about a relationship they have in canon with another character that you admire?

Oliver and Diggle. I could talk about their friendship and stuff for HOURS. How they really do make each other better. I think a lot of people see they’re friendship as “Diggle helped better Oliver and kickstarted him down the green arrow path” or like, Diggle as a stepping stone for Oliver when in actuality they were stepping stones for each other and so much more. Like, When John killed Andy and was about to let himself rot in prison: Oliver pulled him out and gave him somewhere to

19. How about a relationship they have in canon that you don't like?

Ehh I don’t really have one??? BUT i don’t like how the writers made him brush off his grudge against floyd lawton after working with him and Amanda Waller for a day. He should’ve stayed at list a little mad.

23. Favorite picture of this character?

This!!

24. What other character from another fandom of yours that reminds you of them?

I don’t have one really. John is such a special character and I love him so much I guess my brain just doesn’t try to pick out similarities between him and other characters (if that makes sense.)

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now?

Longsuffering accomplice to Oliver’s vigilantism. Now I think he’s someone with strict moral code and priorities who’s not afraid to bend (and sometimes break) for his family and friends. Also someone who’s been through so fucking much??? Like this guy has so much trauma that just goes untalked about?? His father died when he was young. His mom married the guy that was at fault for his father’s death. That guy (his stepdad) was a dick. He joined the army. His brother was presumed dead and he blamed himself for not being able to save him. Then he’s hired as a bodyguard for a guy who just got back from an island and is thrown into his crusade to save his city. This guys now his best friend and he has a wife and daughter, except NOW his best friend kidnapped his wife and left their infant daughter ALONE in an apartment. Then his best friends ran off together and left him to lead the team and protect the city. THEN they come back THEN he finds out that his brother is alive and that he’s been working for an evil organization that their villain of the week is partnered with/runs (can’t remember exactly HOW Damien Darhk was connected to hive) THEN his best friend (who he recently made up with) keeps pushing for him to help his brother but he obviously doesn’t trust either of them THEN he finally agrees to help his brother/try to save him and locks him in a cell/metal box in the bunker and goes to see him everyday THEN WHEN HE FINALLY THINKS THAT HIS BROTHER IS ON HIS SIDE AGAIN HE TURNS ON HIM AND HIS FRIEND DIES BECAUSE OF IT. THEN HE ACCIDENTALLY OFFS HIS BROTHER THEN HE LEAVES HIS TEAM AND FRIENDS BECAUSE HES SO GUILTY AND GOES BACK TO THE ARMY. THEN GETS IN TROUBLE AND ALMOST LETS HIMSELF ROT IN JAIL BECAUSE HES THINKS HE DESERVES IT FOR LAUREL DYING AND KILLING ANDY. I could go on and on about how much TRAUMA he has and then his green lantern arc was just SHOVED UNDER THE RUG??? Like, we could’ve gotten Diggle as a main MAIN character again but nooooo. He’s such a layered character and it was all thrown under the rug after arrow ended.

Sorry, I have a lot feelings about his character and some of them are intelligible. So uh yeah.

[From this ask game]