#but if i do now and in the future i wanna get my driver's license I'll have to do it all again

[acutenobody]

I hate that my family doesn't understand that I don't want a driver's license. Yes, I will get one bc they are expensive af and my dad already paid for it, but I did not ask for it and I don't like to drive.

Why is it so hard to understand that some people don't like to drive?

[ieatangstforbreakfast]

“Love you a little too much.”

Pairing ೃ⁀➷ Earth 42! Miles Morales x Fem! Reader

Summary ೃ⁀➷ Lovers have secrets of their own, no matter how much they come to trust each other, whether it be a past mistake or an unspoken trauma. For you and Miles, however, your secrets came in the form of hidden identities— one being a masked vigilante, and the other a mastermind.

Genre ೃ⁀➷ Forbidden love, mutual pining, eventual angst♡

Tags ೃ⁀➷ Both are artists, reader is from a very wealthy family, both are living double lives, underaged smoking, reader is female and uses she/her pronouns, forbidden love (ish?), swearing, daddy issues, mommy issues, reader is unhinged, both are mentally unstable, lots of flirting.

Author's Note ೃ⁀➷ so I kinda switched it up and in this fanfic, reader is the one giving mixed signals.

Chapter 2: The Secrets You Keep

Warning ೃ⁀➷ Profane language, underaged smoking, mixed signals, horrible Spanish, mommy issues.

FIC MASTERLIST

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Silvery pavements, busy streets, neon lights, and brick-cold air.

New York never truly rests, as they say. A concrete jungle where dreams were once made of. All of what was once so promising about the Yorker dream was plucked out individually with each passing year; money, careers, romance, and peace. Even now, you try to find the beauty of what was once the New York your mother adored, yet what only stared back was this desolate, tragic dystopia. A city that's fallen to ruin.

As the traffic unknots, Miles gently nudges you to the inner part of the sidewalk— subtly shielding you away from the vehicles.

Gentlemen, your mother used to always say. You'll find them not in the fineness of their clothes, but in the way they treat their women.

You can almost picture her, sitting right in front of you with that sickly sweet grin on her face, pearls hanging from her neck and mascara running down her cheeks. Buried beneath her wedding band was a dying cigarette, to which she pulls to slip in between her lips— taking consecutive sips.

There was almost never a time your mother was a mess.

Almost.

Staring at your mother was like staring into a wretched mirror. You were everything she could've been, and she was all you might become.

There was nothing more frightening than looking into your future and finding nothing promising.

"Hey, that's new." And Miles, yet again, pulls you out of your murky thoughts.

"What is?" You pique, the sight of the city dragged back into your sights. Miles points at the ivy-covered building in front of you. It gleamed in warm colors inside, a sight utterly fitting of the autumn season. Its wide, Palladian windows were embellished with orange curtains and striped green dormers. Atop the roof sat a sign, the name of the establishment written in bold, vermilion cursive. You were lulled by the smell of s'mores, hot chocolate, and pie— all the sweet things that reminded you of your precious childhood memories. It had you standing there, reminiscing over the times that were long gone.

"I think it's a café and a book store. Two in one, pretty neat." Miles mentions, looking over to the sight of you. The store's lights seeped out the windows, its golden hues gleaming over your face, highlighting your lashes. You were too lost in thought to even notice his staring.

"How pretty." You airily whispered.

"Yeah." Miles replies, sights still glued onto you.

His gaze soon lowers, noticing your trembling hands fiddling with the hem of your hoodie— a habit the both of you shared. Hesitantly, he lifts his finger, urging to intertwine it with yours.

"Do you think I can apply as a part-timer there?"

He shoves his hands down his pocket instead.

“You wanna apply?”

“Yeah. I wanna save up for summer.”

He raised a brow. “That’s still next year, though?”

“I’m planning on going on a road trip.” You began, a clear view of your plans surfacing in your mind. “I’m getting my driver’s license next year too, so I really want to make the most of it.”

“Driver’s license?”

“Yeah, I’m sixteen.”

“Damn,” Miles shook his head in amusement. “Y’know, I tend to forget you’re older than me.” He then places his hand next to your temple, aligning it with his shoulder. “And it doesn’t help that you’re… This short.”

“Shut the fuck up.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

And of course, Miles indeed didn’t shut the fuck up.

"… Y’know, I bet you'd walk out on your first day with an arson charge."

The two of you meet gazes once more. Miles looked at you with a dead stare, as if he was serious. "What? You're the one talking shit about wanting to go to jail."

"Yeah, I'm boutta fulfill that part of my checklist after I'm done strangling you."

He raised his brows, subtly amused. "Kinky."

You try to slap his arm, but he manages to dodge your hit. He stares deep into your oh-so-fiery glare, cheeks bursting from laughter.

"Look at'chu, you fight like a munchkin from the wizard of Oz."

Pulling your sleeves up, you ready yourself to brawl. "Yeah? Talk your shit, Tin Woodman."

“Oh, I will talk my shit, lollipop gild.”

Amidst your squabble, you and Miles push and pull against one other, lightly shoving each other off like little kids. Your fingers dig into the cloth of his jacket, gripping against his chest with fingers like steel. Though your little plan of shaking him by the collar is spoiled when an itch suddenly burns your nose. You turn around and sneeze, pulling away from his grasps.

".. God, I hate the cold."

He feigns a grimace, taking a step back. "Eww, germs."

"Shut up, you—“

"Stay away, you bubonic plague virus haver."

As you try to search for a comeback, you feel the same itch burn your nostrils— inevitably putting your words on hold. Miles watches as you placed your icy hands over your mouth, sneezing a couple more times. You could almost feel the cold climb up your arms like a ladder, leaving you a shivering mess. Some sort of heat begins to poke in the back of your neck, as though you were flustered like a little girl with a crush. You pull your sleeves down, stabbing your nails into your palm. Miles takes this moment to go behind you, his hands reaching out to unzip your bag. He probes inside in search of your scarf, the long silk pouring out with the grip of his fingers, like [f/c] bleeding into his palm.

As you sniff, the boy turns to you, gently wrapping the cloth over your neck. You look up, beholding the sight of a serious Miles who was too preoccupied with tying the scarf, mumbling about what's the point of bringing the damn thing if you weren't even gonna use it.

“M’not even gonna get a bless you?” You tease.

“You got me: the biggest blessing of your life. What more do you need?”

You hum. “Lots of sleep and an essential oil bath bomb.”

“The fuck’s an essential oil bath bomb?”

“What I need.”

As he finished, he slowly smoothes out the creases with both palms, looking up to meet your stare.

"… What'chu looking at?"

With an airy laugh, you reply. "Just.. You."

His hands pause, yet they stay on your scarf.

"... Idiot." Miles mumbles, grip tightening. "Stop lookin’ at me like that."

"Like what?"

Like you'd follow me to the end of the earth.

"Like a dumbass." He casually answers, flicking his nails over your forehead. "Now get moving, I’ve gotta get you home.”

Miles look over to the café once more, a hand over your shoulder. Slowly, it slips off and trails down your arm before falling to his side. Instinctually, his finger lifts to reach out for your own, though it drops when he hears a buzz in your pockets.

Despite the amount of times it rang, you simply ignored the damn thing. Eventually you did reach out for it, but without even glancing once at the texts, you set it all on 「☾ Do Not Disturb.」

It was only then, as each street passed, that Miles began noticing how the both of you were slowly exiting Brooklyn's poorest areas and started entering what seemed to be the finer parts of the borough. From skeletal buildings and desolate apartments, colorful brownstones appeared before his eyes— showered in leaves of scarlet and orange. It was the sort of Brooklyn you'd find in the movies, the dreamy sort of Brooklyn it used to be three years ago.

An immediate fresh breath of nostalgia.

There was that tiniest hope that lingered deep inside of him, believing that Brooklyn’s still savable.

Eventually, the both of you spot the local Gristedes down the road, the building growing larger with each step. Miles opted to slow his steps down, just to walk longer with you and yet, you paced hurriedly. He follows the sight of your silhouette prancing around, admiring you from afar. When you can no longer sense him, you turn around and halt your walk, waiting for him to keep up. Miles hurriedly jogs to meet you, humming a sweet tune when a sort of blurry vision clouds his mind.

A piercing pain shoots through his temple, making him wince. For a moment, his vision blurs and spots of red taint his eyes. Suddenly, you appear before him in the midst of a fire— glaring at him with such hatred. Your silhouette appears as a dark burgundy, taking center in a world set ablaze.

You call out his name in the feverish illusion.

"Miles."

He winces, taking a step back.

"Miles!"

Suddenly, he's pulled back into reality with your voice.

There you stood, eyes so riddled with worry.

"... What..?"

"Are you okay?" You walk back to him, placing a hand over his forehead. "Are you sick? What happened?"

He gasps for air, but only once. Seeing you now, looking so worried about him, it was enough confirmation that what he saw was all just a dream.

But what in the hell what was that?

As your hand presses against his cheek, Miles cups over it with his own, following the lead of your voice to find peace. "Sorry," He finally spoke, voice too much of a whisper for you to process. "It’s like I hallucinated or sum.”

You click your tongue. "You just had one hit of vape, man, the fuck you on?”

He mumbles an incoherent explanation, to which you grumble. “Do you need medicine? Maybe I can—“ You frantically turn your head in search of a place. “Maybe we can go somewhere and get you some medicine.”

“I’m fine, ma, don’t get all riled up.”

“You’re hot.”

“I know.”

“Not in that way!”

“Ouch.”

“I’m just– I’m worried about you, Miles.”

“Oh, are you now?” He teased, placing a hand over yours.

Miles gently places your hand down, eventually taking your other and burying them both in his palms. Your hands were much smaller and softer compared to his. Like velvet to leather, a paw to a claw.

He gently squeezed, an urge to hold them forever ringing in his mind. Miles looked up to see you and the way your eyes traveled from his hands, to his chest, up to his chin, and then straight into his gaze.

“Do continue worryin’ about me.” He whispers. “I’m feelin’ very special right now.”

You scrunched your brow, looking up with the softest gaze you ever endowed.

“Oh, is that right?”

“Mhm.”

It was enough to steal the air from his lungs. Of all the things, Miles didn't fear for this to all be a dream, he feared that this would all just be a game to you. Dreams would mean that this wasn't you, but a trickery of his mind— his anxiety. He'd be able to keep you once he wakes up. But since this was real, he'd have to suffer through the pain of either losing you or hating you, none of which were choices he liked.

He found you most confusing at times like these.

Most of the time, you were an open book. Your mouth was unfiltered, whether it be in conveying your emotions or saying the most out of pocket things, but at the same time, you often kept to yourself. He hardly heard anything about your family, your friends, or your life— aside from a few side stories you'd recall in the midst of reminiscing— other than that, you kept a lot of secrets.

And he didn't want to invade your privacy, or overstep your boundaries. He figured you'd tell him someday: the things that would bother you, or the memories that'd make you zone out for a few seconds.

He was too afraid of you finding out who he was. Too afraid of losing you, or hating you.

But moments like these were a detriment to his rationality.

In that icy weather, all that made Miles shiver was you.

“Miles.” You called out his name again. “... I think.. I have to go.”

Unconsciously, he mutters. “Already?”

“We’ll see each other again tomorrow.” You couldn’t help but comfort of him. “I promise.”

Let’s meet in our little place. I won’t call it my home, because home is wherever you go.

He swallows the lump that had formed at his throat, hesitantly releasing your hands. “Okay.” He sighs. “Okay, get home safely.” He detangles your fingers, savoring the warmth of your skin. You pivot your heel to leave, pulling your hood over your head. Miles simply watches as you walk and turn one last time.

“Bring your sketchbook next time, alright?”

He nods. “I will.”

“Buh-bye.” You wave one final time. Miles raised his hand to bid you adieu.

If only you knew.

As you disappear down the block, Miles clutches the notebook carefully hidden in his inner pocket.

It was at that moment, Miles couldn’t help but ponder.

How could I show you my sketchbook when all it’s filled of is you?

Uh, uh, catch me ridin’ like a bitch

Got the six forty-five, catch me ridin’ with my bitch

Uh, long hair, Lana, that’s my bitch

Uh, You can tell by the swagger and the lips, uh

The radio eases down with the volume upon the flick of a finger.

“How was she?”

Snapped from the voice of his uncle, Miles’ head perks up. An icy water bottle flies past Aaron’s hand, tossing it over to Miles as it landed straight into his palms. “Did’ya finally tell her?” He adds, to which the boy slumps deep into his seat and grumbles.

Drenched in sweat and small bruises, Miles took his well-deserved break atop his uncle’s couch— chest rising and falling with each heave, wifebeater all soaked. He squints at the ceiling while lazily popping the cap off the bottle. “I don’t even have to tell her, man. She knows— I know she knows, but I dunno if- if she likes me too or if she’s jus playin’ w’me.” Miles manages to rant in between heavy breaths, mind and body completely exhausted from training. Aaron sits by his side, dragging a towel over his neck.

“Yikes. What makes you think that?”

The cold water smoothly flushes down his throat, easing his fatigue. “She flirts with me more than I flirt with her— damn, I can’t even get a single line in.”

“.. You like a chick that’s got more game than you?” Aaron reiterates, amused by what he’s hearing. He laughs at Miles’ frustrated face, shaking his head. “You sure you’re my nephew, man?”

“Oh, I’ve got game.” The boy defends himself. “I held her hands and everythin’. She’s prolly hella into me too.”

“Or, she just plays the game better than you do.”

“Nah—“ Miles denies, but it makes him think. “Nah, she’s into me. I’m sure of it, but I think she’s kind of like… Denying it or I dunno.”

He recalls the way you scrunched your brows, and looked up at him as though he was all you could ever want to look at. It’s got him zoning out, nibbling on the brim of his bottle like a nervous little pup. Aaron simply shrugs. “I’m just sayin’, Miles, it’s not like y’all are in the Titanic. I don’t see why she wouldn’t go for ya.”

“I mean,” He scavenges for the right words to say. “I mean, what if she’s like.. Not ready or sum?”

“… How old is she?”

“Sixteen.”

Aaron’s head spun in a quick flash. “Sixteen!? Aren’t you fifteen? Damn, now I don’t blame her. You’re a whole kid in her eyes, my man.”

“A ki— a kid!?” He scoffed. “I’d have to squat down just to reach her height— why the hell would she see me as a kid?”

While taking a sip off his bottle, Aaron lifts a finger cautiously. “That,” He spoke in between sips. “That’s the reason why she sees you as a kid.” Miles furrows his brows, completely anonymous to the reason. “You’re too defensive. You should be more suave, my man. Be a gentleman.“ He pulls up a couple moves. “Jazz her like this. The ladies love dancing.”

“You telling me I gotta dance with her or sum?” Chewing on his cheek, he grumbles. “Now, how the hell do I do that?”

Aaron hums.

“You know all about the shoulder touch?”

Tick. Tick. Tick.

Dark halls, hushed voices in a box.

“I’m not having this conversation with you again.”

The chair’s legs screech against the marble as he stands up.

"She's turning sixteen next year, hardly even eighteen, if this gets out— not only would it be harmful for our family reputation, she'll be permanently eradicated from receiving opportunities in the future."

A dead gaze hung in the darkness, eyeing the figure that stood before him stubbornly.

"Your sister is incredibly capable, and she's doing a lot to support our means for the sake of the family."

Tick. Tick. Tick.

"Which is more than what I can say for you, Antonne."

Antonne stood before his father, chin held high and gaze, unyielding. The old man tapped his pen against the mahogany, each tick filling in the spaces between the clock's ticking. Within the spaces, and with each passing second, Antonne stood in the thick tension that filled the office like a soldier keeping his head above water.

The old man’s pen points at him accusingly. "Be happy for her, as she's cleaning up after your mistakes. Who would you be without your sister?”

The boy tenses.

“Do you think you’ll be able to save yourself?”

Antonne stood by the hall, eyes daunt and staring a thousand yards deep into an invisible void. For a while, he shortly allowed his mind to go completely blank. Well, it wasn't entirely blank, it was full— but everything was all blurred together that it was better to think that he was thinking about nothing.

A restless mind paired along with an unfortunately still beating heart.

His head’s piqued when a familiar sound of footsteps begin to permeate amidst the hall. The steady sound of heels thumping against the carpet, like a careful warning to those who stood in her way.

“Antonne,” Her voice calls out. “What are you doing out here?”

Your presence emerges from the shadows like a ghost who’d waited for too long. He steps in front your father’s office door, as if to block your entrance. Parting his lips, he calls for your name.

“… Your job. Are you sure you want to partake in such a thing?”

You raise a brow, understandably befuddled by his sudden disruption.

“I’m going to be honest with you.” He begins. “Our family is not the best. Our money doesn’t come mainly from sanctioned ways although we parade it as though it were. I can forgive all that, but what I can’t forgive is ruining all your potential.”

“I don’t understand. Where is all this coming from?” Your gaze narrows harshly. Though you try to appear genuinely ignorant of what he’s saying, the knowledge of it was enough to make your blood boil. Antonne sighed a deep sigh, a million words pouring into his mind like waves crashing.

“I am simply worried about you,” He claims. “You’ve been handling these affairs since you were thirteen. And it’s unfair for you to handle such things when you’re only fifteen—“

“I’m sixteen.”

“… When you’re only sixteen.”

You scoff. “Do you even have any idea of what I’m doing?”

“.. The job you’re doing, was my job three years ago.” Antonne’s words made you grit your teeth. “I know all about what you do, and I may have failed in what I did— I’m not as smart or as cunning as you— but I’ll never forget how that job ruined me.”

You snicker. “You talk like that, but you want the job to yourself.”

Your brother stiffens, but his face remains ever-so stoic.

“It’s better for you to give the job to me.”

“This is what it’s all about?” Your voice lividly lowers into a hush as you take a step towards him. “You abandoned all your responsibilities, made me carry the hotel for three years, and now that the work’s lighter, you want to take it away from me?”

With each step you take, Antonne soon finds his back pressed against the door, swallowing the lump that had formed at his throat. With one final attempt to get you to listen, he finally pulls.

“Does he know?”

Gesturing over to the fineness of your clothes, the shine of your pearls, Antonne then hissed.

“That boy you meet in Brooklyn. Does he know who you are?”

Visibly startled upon the mention of Miles, your frustration crumbles into caution. Your head turns away, lids twitching. “I’m not quite sure what you’re talking about.” Was your attempt of a lie. Antonne straightened his lips, determined to rekindle his confident stature.

“… How naïve of you.” Antonne seethed. “Do you think father’s going to let this go once he finds out?”

You scoff. “Is that a threat?”

“A warning.” He corrects of you. “Have you forgotten who you are? You’re our family’s only daughter— you’re the face of our family in high society. Not only that, but you’re engaged.”

“I’m sixteen. Fuck you mean ‘engaged’? That engagement’s hardly been processed as a legitimate promise. You and I both know it’s for the sake of shutting up the Fisks, anyway.”

“It’s scandalous.” Antonne spewed with venom on his tongue. “You’re not a kid. You’re two years away from being an adult.” He thrusts an accusing finger into your shoulder blade. “And everyone’s eyes are on you— if people were to ever find out about your little escapade, you’d be ruined.”

“Then cover it up.” You ruthlessly shoot back. “That’s all our family ever does anyway.”

As you try to maneuver past him, Antonne then interjected.

“Then what about that boy? What would he think?”

And that’s enough to make you freeze.

“Would he be able to handle you? You… Don’t forget that he could’ve known someone who was a victim.”

You could almost imagine Miles’ face contorting into disgust upon the unveiling of the truth. An inevitable scene. You’d been trying to run away from the scene like a dog with your tail caught between your legs. Your teeth dig a little too deep into your lips, blood seeping in the corners of your frown. Though you try to keep your composure, the mention of Miles was enough to send you trembling.

“No matter how much you hide it, he’ll learn about your identity sooner or later.”

“He won’t.” Your reply came out haggardly. “He won’t find out.”

“And what makes you so sure?”

Your jaw clenches, eyes bloodshot from exhaustion. You think about throwing something at him, or pulling on his hair— yet you ease your nerves like any other dignified girl.

As if on cue, your father opens the door, exchanging glances between you and your brother, reeking of fresh tobacco and dust.

“What the hell are you two doing, bickering in front of my door?”

His voice is harsh and demeaning, like winter at its worst peak. A voice that haunted you all throughout your younger years, now it was just nothing but another normality to you and your dull days.

“It’s nothing, dad.” You reassure, casting a side-eye at Antonne. “Nothing at all.”

Only then, you pulled the manila folder up to exit the situation. “In regards to the landscaping for the hotel, I have the submissions. I figured we should discuss about it.”

“Right,” He snaps his fingers. “Shall we?”

You leave Antonne in the darkness, shutting the door with a slam.

“God… She’s going to be the death of all of us.”

[spidermans-l-o-v-e-r]

Strawberries and Cream

Pairing: Eddie x Reader

Word count: 5.1k

Notes: TAKE MY HANDDDDD ILL TSKD THE LEADDDD AND EVERY TURN WILL BE SAFE WORH MEEEEE

✨🍓Strawberries and Cream playlist🍓✨

Warnings: Eddie does have a small PTSD attack in this chapter and im ugly laughing it actually gave ME a panic attack to write so it is short and sweet and will probably not be discussed in the future I apologize if its not a very good scene but I couldn’t take my time on it

Episode 5: Drivers License

“Oh come on, will you just tell me?”

Eddie is relaxing in the passenger seat of Bucks jeep, he’d lent it to you for the night. Not that you two weren’t practically sharing it at this point, you’d drop him off for the day and he’d let you go crazy with it. 

“It’s not a surprise if I tell you,” You tell him for the 6th time. He’d let you blindfold him as soon as you got into the car

“I’m just supposed to trust you? A total stranger? You know you blindfolded me, the least you could have done was take me to dinner first you know. I'm not saying I'm not totally into this but still” 

“Oh shut up” You whack him in the stomach and he snickers 

“You wanna know what else I’m into?” His voice is deep and sultry and it shoots straight down to your core

“You wanna know what else I’m into” you mock him, your voice high-pitched pitched and he laughs at you, reaching over and feeling over your torso. You whack him again and he snickers 

“Hey! Fresh!!” 

“I’m just looking for your thigh, sweet pea, that's all. Again, can’t freakin see remember?” 

You take his hand and set it on your thigh and he squeezes lightly, rubbing it softly. 

“Thank you, brat” 

Your mouth drops open and he can hear the little sound it makes when it does

“Go ahead, fight it.” 

You take his hand and throw it back at him and he laughs at you. 

“You know that’s what I love about you, how irritating you can be” He sticks his tongue out at you and you punch his side, he shrieks and cringes away from you and your mouth drops wide open 

“Oh my god” You poke his side and he jerks, snorting before slapping his hand over his mouth 

“Oh my god!!!” You shout “You’re ticklish right there aren’t you?!?!!”

“No, fuck! No!” 

You poke him again and again and all he can do is scream and laugh, he tries to hold his sides but he’s blindfolded and he can’t stop your little onslaught. You’re laughing gleefully and absolutely torturing him and he’s wheezing trying to protect himself and full-on ugly laughing 

“Stop!! Please! Please, I'm gonna pee!” He’s kicking his legs and sinking into the chair and cackling as you wipe away tears from how hard you’re laughing at him 

“Nah you gotta ask nicer than that!! Beg me!!” 

“Are you shitting m-“ 

You needle his side as he protests and screams again

“Okay, fuck, fine you win, okay!!” He’s trying to catch his breath

“I’m waiting” you giggle in a singsong voice 

“Please Y/N will you stop tickling me” His voice is flat and lifeless and you poke him a little. He jerks again and you snicker 

“That sucked”

“Fine!” He turns to you and you giggle, turning his head so he’s actually facing you 

“Y/N will you please? Stop tickling me?” He makes a little pouty face “Please? I’m defenseless and that’s not fair” He whines a little and reaches out for you pathetically 

You gulp. Okay. That was kind of attractive. 

He leans forward, tilting his head sweetly and you know the eyes he’s making at you, even if you can’t see them. He pouts even more, even giving his lip a little nibble

“Are you done now? Please, baby?” 

Your mouth drops open and he chuckles at the little noise it makes. He sits properly in his chair with a smug little grin on his face 

“Thank you”

Taking care of Eddie over the last week has been nice. He’s an easy patient. Although incredibly stubborn at times, constantly says he can do things on his own when you know- he can’t. 

And it’s kind of cool to be living here temporarily, though the spare bed isn’t getting much use, Eddie claims he prefers it if you sleep in his room so in case he really needs something at night he doesn’t have to get out of bed. He never wakes you though and he holds you tightly, his face nuzzled into your neck. 

It’s been four days since Eddie’s accident and his recovery is going well…just a bit slower than the doctor thought and neither of you are having a problem with that. 

He refuses your help in the bathroom, saying he’s perfectly fine and he is but he turns into a complete baby everywhere else. Especially when it comes to being in the living room. He traps you on the couch with him each time, wrapping his arms around you like he does when you sleep together and keeps you there all day. 

He doesn’t leave your side often which is funny considering it’s supposed to be the other way around. He’s sat on the counter drying dishes slowly just so you can talk. 

It’s purely domestic the way you two are living but all good things must come to an end. 

And they do, on a night when there’s a storm raging outside and the power goes out and you hate the dark and the way it causes you to panic…and a quick flash of lightning accompanied by a jarring bang of thunder causes him to have a flashback, the ones he wouldn’t address, he refused to address 

He knew it was coming, there were signs, signs that he ignored. Signs that his friends…his family tried to point out and he refused to acknowledge them in any way whatsoever and now here he was, losing control on the only person who made it okay again.

And it reminds you that maybe you don’t know everything about him like you feel you do. Because you don’t know how to calm him down in that moment and he’s screaming at you and you’re screaming back and you’re not sure when Buck was called, maybe it was when Eddie knocked your phone off the nightstand, but he’s there now and he’s shoving you out of the room and locking the door and Maddie is there, with a flashlight as she pulls you into your room while you sob. 

And then it’s quiet again. And the storm settles down and you don’t hear Eddie anymore. Maddie lays with you, your head on her chest as she strokes your hair. You’d long since fallen asleep but she stays up for you, watching you. Because she knows how the dark makes you feel. 

Buck comes in, he looks exhausted and worried and pent up and she smiles softly, reaching her arm out and he lays on the other side of her. She’s going to be an amazing mother. 

“Hi” 

You jump at the sound of his voice, it’s the next morning. He looks awful and you know you look the same. He looks… pitiful and it hurts. 

“Hi” 

You grab another cup from the cabinets and pour the coffee, holding it out for him. He walks over slowly, taking it by the rim and setting it down on the counter 

“A-are you okay?” He whispers, his voice shaky and nervous. His hands slide up your arms, as he bends forward and puts his forehead against yours 

“Are….we? Okay?”

“I don’t know…” you hear his breath hitch, his grip on your arms tighten just the littlest bit and you sigh, kissing him softly. It’s nothing like it’s been, this is quick and a bit hesitant. Like you’re worried it might set him off again 

“And yeah of course we are Eddie… I’m not- I could never leave you. You’re my friend…“ 

He snorts and his head falls to your shoulder, you can feel the tears falling down your chest as you wrap your arms around his neck, careful of his shoulder he clearly reinjured. 

“Friends huh?”

It still sounds stupid for you both to say, especially after this last week, but it’s true for now. You know there’s a future here, that’s clear. But… it’s a little more obvious now that there’s more to Eddie than his good looks and flirting skills. 

“Friends” you smirk, pulling away from him. He still holds you, his arms wrapped around you as you lay your head on his chest. He rests his chin on your head and you both just stay there for a little bit while he calms down, his tears drying up. 

“I didn’t….hurt you did I?” He asks quietly and you shake your head 

“No, just scared me. But I guess it didn’t help I was already scared about the power”

“Yeah, I’m… fuck- I should have taken care of you. I’m sorry” 

“Stop saying that” you scold him, worming your way out of his hold 

“You apologized sincerely already and I accepted it. I don’t want to talk about it anymore”

“Are you sure? Because we can… I don’t want you to have to hold onto that” 

The look you give him as you blink slowly and purse your lips. 

“You know what shut up” He smirks, pushing your head away from him. He flicks you off and you whack his chest 

“You got some nerve. Asshat” 

He chuckles, picking up the cup of coffee from the counter and taking a long, slow, sip. He turns away from you, clearing his throat 

“I’ll talk to someone” 

That’s what brings you to today, four days later. A little surprise outing. 

He compliments your new shorts and you roll your eyes at him 

“Thank you”

You’re listening to the directions through a pair of earbuds because you know he’s gonna know where you’re taking him if he hears the directions and you want it to be a surprise. His hand tentatively finds its way back on your thigh and he strokes it softly, enjoying the way you feel under his fingertips. Your soft, buttery skin, the various little bumps, and dips that make up you. He likes his hands on you.

You finally pull up to the drive-in, you missed The Mummy but tonight they were playing The third Transformers movie, Dark of the Moon and you’re so excited about it. You flash the guy your tickets on your phone through the window and he waves you through 

“Okay, we’re here,” You say pulling into a spot on the grass and letting down the windows. “You can take that off now” 

Eddie pulls the bandanna from his eyes and blinks a little, getting used to the lights around him. He chuckles softly and shakes his head, looking at his hands 

“Tadaaaa” You wiggle your fingers then unbuckle your seatbelt 

“I’ll go get us some popcorn before it starts! Do you want anything to drink?” 

Eddie pulls you back into him and kisses down your hand 

“Absolutely not. I’ll go buy it” 

“Hey! No fair this is my thing now! I buy you popcorn and whatever else you want” 

“I’m a damn gentleman, you already paid for the tickets. And I know they were expensive”

You bat at him with your hands trying to get him to stay and he bats at you with his good hand trying to make you stay. 

“Compromise!” You huff and he nods 

“Okay yeah! You buy the tickets, I buy the refreshments!” He opens the door and flicks you off, blowing a raspberry at you as he leaves 

“You’re a child Eddie!!” 

“Your mom’s a child!” 

Your mouth drops wide open and you gasp indignantly, as he walks away laughing. 

Eddie comes back with a ridiculous-sized popcorn and a shopping bag. He hands you the popcorn and climbs into the jeep, setting the bag on the floor. 

“Alright, I got candy, sodas, and weirdly? Mini muffins. Blueberry ones. Oh! And-” 

He pulls out a paper bag and hands it to you and your eyes roll back as you inhale slowly 

“Oh these are fresh aren’t they” You take a completely unladylike bite of the churro and moan dramatically while slumping against your seat “So good” you whimper and he snickers, taking a bite of his own and falling back with you 

“Okay maybe you weren’t exaggerating” 

As the sun sets you get comfy next to him, scooting as close as you both can and leaning your head on his shoulder. He kisses your head and smiles softly 

“Thanks for tonight” 

“I thought we could use it” 

You and Eddie snack and joke as the movie rolls, it’s nice being with him, and had this been a real date it would have been the perfect first date. Maddie was right, this was kind of a romantic vibe. His arm is draped over your shoulder and you’re nestled into his chest now while he rubs soft little circles on your arm.

It’s soothing and comforting… and the smell of his cologne and the grey sweatpants he’s wearing is shooting straight down to your core. You shift a little, trying to ease the heat between your legs but it’s absolutely no use. The way he’s gently tickling your skin just amps you up even more. It definitely doesn’t help you two have been together every waking moment of every day for the last week or so. 

“You okay princess?” He whispers, his hand sliding down to your hip and giving it a squeeze 

“You’re tense, the movies not scaring you is it?” He smirks and you slap his leg, rolling your eyes

“No! What am I a baby? No, I'm just- uh- I need to go to the bathroom” You sit up out of his arms and open the door, hopping out 

“Alright, hurry back. Call me if you need me, Baby” He winks at you and you glare at him giving him the finger and walking off to find the bathrooms. 

There’s not much of a line and you’re thankful for that, just a little cold water on your face and you’ll be good. 

“Y/N??” 

You whirl around, to come face to face with Hen and her wife, they’re holding drinks in their hands

“Oh hi, Hen! Hi… you?” 

“Karen” She laughs, shaking your hand. 

“What are you doing here? I didn’t know you knew about this place. Buck drag you?”

“Uhh… no??” Your voice is high-pitched and you twiddle your thumbs in front of you 

“So who are you here with? You’re dressed pretty cute” Karen asks and you feel your cheeks flush, you shrug your shoulders 

“Oh my god. Oh- you’re here with Eddie aren’t you” 

Hen pulls out her phone and immediately snaps a picture of you. You groan loudly and slap your hands over your eyes 

“It’s just a friend thing!!! I swear!!” 

“Friend my ass” Hen snorts and Karen shakes her head with a smirk. 

“You’re all so invested in their love life” 

“Are you gonna act like you weren’t eating up everything I was telling you when I told you they made out” 

“You told her we made out?!” You yell and people around you look at you like the crazy person you currently are 

“Uh…sorry..” you say sheepishly 

“Of course, I told her, she’s my wife” 

You frown. Cause dang, she’s got you there. 

“So why aren’t you with him now?” Hen wiggles her eyebrows suggestively and Karen elbows her 

“Because I just needed to use the bathroom I just needed to splash some water on my face okay I just needed some air” 

“Air? This is an open field girl” Karen raises an eyebrow “Why did you need space?” 

You groan and spin around, stomping your feet like a child 

“He’s… overwhelming in small spaces okay?! He just- he smells so good and his hands are so big and he’s wearing grey sweatpants-“

“Damn I’ve seen him in grey sweatpants” Hen mumbles 

“Exactly!!! And oh my god I just… I want to- “ 

“Let it out girl, let it out” Karen rubs your shoulder

“I want to rip those stupid sweatpants off and ride that cowboy until the cows come home…and I don’t even know what that means!!!” 

Hen barks out a laugh and holds her stomach 

“And god have you seen his lips?! They’re so pretty, they’re so so pretty I know he’s good I just know it!!” 

“What about his work suspenders?” Karen asks and you practically melt into her arms 

“Please, dear god please don’t get me started on his damn uniform”

“Double cheeked up constantly”

“For no fucking reason!!” You practically scream and Karen loses it, laughing at the both of you. 

“Hello ladies, fancy meeting you here. There you are sugar cube” Eddie comes walking over, his hands in his pockets. Hen elbows you repeatedly and you swat her arm away praying he didn’t hear any of that  

“I got worried” he bends down, kissing your forehead and you stand there dumbly as he wraps his arms around your waist. Karen wolf whistles and you roll your eyes 

“Were you able to use the bathroom?” He asks, staring down at you and you take a second, just staring into his pretty eyes…his pretty face… 

“Y/N?” He hums softly, nuzzling his nose against yours “You’re missing the movie sweet girl” Hen and Karen coo behind you and you flick them off 

“Oh, we can go back now! I’m all good!” 

You all say your goodbyes and as soon as Eddie turns around they make lewd gestures and your mouth drops. They walk off cackling and you stomp off after Eddie. Eddie opens the door for you, helps you in, and shuts it behind you. You smooth your hands over your thighs, watching him walk around the car. He’s… fine as hell. Even when he’s just walking. 

“Okay this is getting out of hand” you mumble under your breath as you pull out your phone, going straight to your health app. You scroll through slowly before groaning and shoving your phone back into your pocket

You’re right in the beginning of your fertile period. 

“So you think I was cute enough?” He snickers as he shuts the door 

“Hm?” You ask distractedly, his shirt has ridden up a bit and you can just see the little happy trail leading to your buried treasure. 

“I was just trying to embarrass you” he chuckles, handing you a box of your favorite candy “but you seem distracted… I didn’t upset you did I? It was just a joke honestly-“ 

“No no!! No, it was funny!! Uh, hilarious! Haha! So funny” you ramble and he looks at you like you’ve grown six heads 

“Are you sure?” He asks, he does look worried about you now and you blush deeply 

“I’m fine Eddie I swear” You lean over and kiss him on the nose and he smiles, his cheeks blushing 

“Alright… if you say so” His finger trails along your jaw, hooking under your chin before he pulls you in slowly, his lips meet yours pressing together softly as they move in sync. He groans quietly, you taste sweet, like those gummy bears you’d eaten. Sweet and warm and inviting

His tongue dips into your mouth, slow and languid and the way he wraps it around your tongue is absolutely sinful. Your thighs tremble as you scoot closer to him and he smirks against your lips. He pulls away a little, just to look at you.

“Fuck you’re pretty” 

“So are you” You whisper. The movie is long forgotten, which not gonna lie sucks a little, it’s a good movie. 

He smirks, kissing along your jaw and down your neck. You gasp softly when he bites down on your sweet spot, causing you to moan. He snickers, licking and sucking until he leaves a love bite. 

“Your shirt is too low” 

He says suddenly, biting and sucking on more exposed skin and your heart flutters under his lips

“W-what?” Your brain is hot and fuzzy, your panties aren’t even an ocean anymore they’re just fully soaked through 

“Need a necklace baby girl” he mumbles against your neck and your mouth drops wide open 

“Eddie Diaz!” You scold him and he pulls away. His eyes are intense, and he licks his lips slowly, looking at you like he could just eat you up and maybe he will… 

“Hm?” He asks playfully, booping your nose all innocently like his dirty ass wasn’t going to take you in the backseat if you’d let him 

“We should watch the movie, you know the whole reason we’re here!!” 

You’re flustered and hot and you’ve never wanted to jump a man more than you want to right now in this moment. He’s just so…Eddie. 

“Yeah, I suppose… you did buy the tickets after all… but I don’t know, I’m getting kind of cold” 

“Oh!” You’re surprised he’s cold at all, personally, you’re ready to rip off all your clothes with how hot you are…for multiple reasons “Here let me turn on the-“ 

“No this is fine” 

He unceremoniously pulls you over into his lap, leaning the seat back some so you’re both laid back together. You can feel him. Those pants do nothing to hide that from you in the least. His cock strains against the material and your mouth waters. 

“There we go! Nice and cozy” he puts his arms around you, cuddling you into his chest. 

Eddie holds you tightly in his arms for the rest of the movie. You shift and wriggle and he just lets you, a sneaky little smirk on his face but he won’t let you go, hell no. 

Eventually, he spanks you. He actually spanks you, right on the butt as you’re trying to climb from his lap for the fourth time. 

“Settle down or I’ll make you” 

There’s no room for any sort of argument in his tone and god is it sexy. Which is just embarrassing the way you stop fighting him almost immediately 

“Good girl” 

You pick up McDonalds on the way home, it’s pouring rain and you can barely see. Eddie watches the way your hands grip the steering wheel, your knuckles are practically white, he’d drive for you if he could, but he’s not allowed to.

“Pull over into that parking lot” He nods with a fry in his mouth as he takes your phone and starts typing “You can barely see any way it’s not safe”

“You’re not safe” you mumble, as you pull over and park in the empty parking lot. He’s not wrong, you can barely see anything in front of you. He sets your phone back on the dashboard and gets out of the car

“Eddie?! What are you doing?!” You yell over the rain when he opens your door 

“Making you relax”

He takes your hand, pulling you out into the rain with him, he leans back into the jeep and cranks the volume. You look up at the sky as you step out, letting the large drops soak into your skin. He walks you in front of the headlights and bows 

“Can I have this dance?” 

You hear the beginning notes of the song playing and you immediately melt, looking down and giggling 

“Yeah” 

He carefully wraps his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his chest as he holds your hand in his. You rest your head on his chest and dance with him in the rain, the song isn’t very long but you’re both soaked through by the time it ends. He pulls off his sopping wet shirt and tosses it to the front of the Jeep and you blush, your hands slide over his chest and rest on his shoulders and he smirks 

“That’s it? Not gonna get handsy?” He takes your hands from his shoulders, putting them on his torso and you groan, letting your head fall against his chest 

“Quit it!” Your cheeks are flushed as he slides your hands over his chest, letting you feel him up and you’re trying so hard not to enjoy the way his body feels underneath your fingertips

“But I’m cold and your hands are so warm” He pouts, and you laugh at him, pulling your hands away 

“You’re being such a fuck boy right now. You know you almost had it too! Dancing in the rain and everything!”

His head falls back as he laughs and you take the second to just… enjoy the way the rain falls over his body. The little droplets you just want to lick off his body, you almost wish you could take a picture of him just like this. 

“Did I ruin it?” he asks sincerely, with a sweet smile on his face as he looks back at you, and you melt under those gorgeous brown eyes 

“Nah, I don’t think you could even if you tried” You put your arms around his neck and he surprises you by lifting you up and walking you backwards 

Your back hits the front of the jeep as another song starts to play, he holds your thighs, sliding his hands up a bit so he can hold your ass. His lips find yours automatically 

You moan softly into the kiss, your hands settling around his neck. He grins and shakes his head, pulling away and kissing down your jaw

“I love that sound,” He says, his voice low and seductive in your ear so you can hear him over the heavy rain 

“I don’t know if I can wait anymore Y/N”

“What does that mean?” You let your head fall back on the Jeep as he kisses down your neck and over your breasts, you dizzily watch him leave even more hickies, he’s making a little heart out of them and your hips move on their own, grinding against him. He looks up at you with a little smirk, watching you desperately try and get off against him. 

“The next time I get you in bed…any bed I’m going to make you want me as much as I want you” 

“I already do” you pant softly “And I thought we agreed no sex” 

“Oh we did…and I still agreed. But it’s just messing around…s’ not really the same thing if I don’t put it in baby” 

You laugh breathlessly because that’s such a childish way of making you do that… and he’s not really making you is he? Because god the way he’s kissing you, you’d let him take you in the backseat if he asked

“Well since you’ve made such a great argument” You purr softly, scrunching his wet curls in your fingers. He chuckles as the water falls down his face and he kisses your nose 

“That’s my good girl” 

“You really… really have to stop saying that” you sigh as he carries you over to the passenger side door and opens it. The rain has finally settled down some and you guys can probably drive again. He sets you down and you blush, looking down at your legs and shrugging. He pulls your soaked shirt over your head and rings it out as best he can

“And why’s that hm?”  He reaches in and turns on the heater, his body is so intimidating as he leans in close to you. Your heart pounds in your chest as he turns down the stereo and stands back in front of you 

“Just um… you just have to” you say, twiddling your thumbs. He looks at you curiously then bends down to your height so he can face you 

“What’s wrong? You don’t like being called that?” 

“Nooo…no it’s uh- it’s not that…”

“Oh?… Ohhh” he says quietly, Standing up and tilting your chin up to face him. A shit-eating grin on his face. You groan quietly and roll your eyes, he chuckles and boops your nose 

“I’ll remember that one pretty girl” 

He drives home, even though he isn’t supposed to. The heater blasts as he holds your hand, enjoying the way you play with his fingers shyly. How you’ve both ended up in this Jeep almost naked twice he’ll never know… he’d have two nickels though 

“He’s gonna kill us if we keep getting these seats wet” He jokes as he pulls into his driveway, he looks over at you, leaned back in the seat, almost asleep and he’s crushed his shoulder is hurt and he can’t carry you in like he wants to. 

“Hey… Wake up sugar cube we’re home” He gently rubs your thigh, but you don’t really come out of it much. He helps you stumble into his house, guiding you to his bedroom. 

He grabs a shirt from his drawer, watching you sway on your feet a little. Chuckling, he quietly puts the shirt over your head and places a little kiss on your forehead. It’s a little awkward but he doesn’t want you getting sick, he reaches under the shirt and takes your bra off, setting it gently on the dresser to dry. 

“This is gonna be a little uncomfortable” He mumbles before he reaches down and does the same with your panties, just tossing them into his hamper out of the way. 

“Alright, come on sleepy-pants” 

He walks you over to his bed and pulls the covers back, patting your butt and urging you to climb in. He tucks you in and smiles a little when you snuggle into the covers and let out a calming sigh. He goes to get changed into his pajamas when you whine a little, reaching out for him

“I have to go change” He bats your hand away “Unless you wanna see me naked I have to go change in the bathroom honey”

You manage to find the edge of his boxers and hold onto them, tugging a little

“Oookay... I guess I’m staying” 

He puts his hands on his hips, looking around for something to make this as easy as possible. It’s not that he doesn’t want you to see him naked, because he would drop his boxers in an instant if you asked. But you’re clearly not thinking straight right now… 

“Okay well, guess we just gotta get this over with” 

He drops his boxers quickly, hiding his cock with his hands, and reaches for a t-shirt. He covers himself up with it and reaches for a pair of dry boxers 

“Mmmm nice ass” You mumble and he snorts loudly, looking down at you. Your eyes are heavily lidded as you blink slowly, your lips slightly parted 

“Thanks, it’s natural” he snickers as he pulls on his boxers finally. He pushes you back a bit and you scoot slowly, making enough room for him to get in with you. He puts his arms around you and you snuggle deep into his chest, inhaling slowly

“Smells nice,” You say and he smiles, liking the feeling of your soft breaths against his chest 

“Thank you again… Go to sleep pretty girl, I’ve got you” 

“G’night Eddie” You mumble into his chest, he runs his hand over your hair and kisses the top of your head

“Goodnight Sugar Cube”

[cherubofthenight]

i'm somewhat prepared for my 20s

here's what i learned:

- You gotta save yourself; no one's gonna do it for you. Everyone has their own life, so take charge of yours!

- Starting over? You can do that whenever you want—it's unlimited! And remember, your body can tell you when a relationship isn’t giving you what you need and deserve.

- Stay away from people who are too scared to live life. And those who make fun of or insult you as a "joke"? Yeah, it's never really a joke. Surround yourself with people who genuinely care about your well-being and support you.

- People that don't have goals aren't for people who do.

- Are you your second option? No. So why would you be anyone else’s?

- Being single is a blessing, but if you do get into/are in a relationship make sure you have hobbies or hyper-fixation onto said person will most likely happen if it hasn't happened yet.

- Retinol at 25 is a must—it promotes collagen production and helps prevent fine lines and early signs of aging. And don’t forget sunscreen! Skin cancer is real—ask Hugh Jackman.

- Setting limits and boundaries is key to protect yourself in any relationship. Avoid oversharing, too! Think about the level of intimacy and trust with the person. If they seem disinterested or uncomfortable, that’s your cue to change the subject. Be clear about what topics you’re willing to discuss, and practice saying no when it comes to personal matters. Past experiences of oversharing can serve as good reminders to guard your privacy.

- Take care of your appearance. dress right, eat right, accessorize, etc.

- Get comfortable saying "no" without feeling guilty. Taking care of yourself should never feel like a chore; if it does, something's off.

- Never chase a man; that's just a waste of energy.

- Get your driver’s license and buy/start saving for a car like, now!

- Law of detachment. cultivating inner peace, focus on the present & and trusting yourself.

- Taking care of & bettering yourself should never feel like a chore

- Meditate—clearer mind means better decisions. Socialize and network; just get out of the house sometimes. But don’t be everywhere all the time. Your feelings matter, and only you know what you’ve been through.

- People come and go, and I like to see it as the universe teaching me lessons about the type of people I want in my life.

- Be particular with whom you share let into your space.

- Pleasing people will get you nowhere.

- Try new things, build new skills. sign up for freakin skillshare if you have to girl just DO SOMETHING.

- Sometimes you just gotta say "my future husband/wife/spouse would never" and move on.

- Vision boards. keep that future 'range rover pilates mom who works only when she wats to bc she and her spouse are STACKED' ver of yourself in your mind esp when you make life changing decisions.

- As the person living your life, you're the main character which means you should become someone that YOU love and stay true to them. you gotta be able to challenge yourself and then have faith that you can overcome and win always. you're probably still gonna care what people think, but your opinion of yourself should always matter the most. i don't wanna keep living by what i think someone is gonna think of me and then in 5-10 years im a bum who hasn't done shit for her self because she chose to live in fear yk.

- Perspective matters. always be the 'glass half-full' type of person. never focus on lack, celebrate whatever abundance you and practice gratitude. it helps so much in terms of focusing on and thus manifesting positivity in your life.

- Start taking care of your health now, your older self is gonna thank you.

- Knowledge is indeed power. stay curious, ask questions, do that research, read those books, watch those video essays.

- Take the time to get to know yourself—go out, stay in, try new things, and find out what you like and dislike. Avoid comparing yourself to others; you’re on your own separate journey.

- Financial literacy is essential. Learn to save, budget, and invest now; 30 year old you will be thanking you, once again miss range rover pilates mom.

- Not everyone is going to like you, and that's totally okay.

- Invest in your mental health; it’ll help you cope, make better decisions, and maintain healthy relationships while reducing burnout.

- It’s okay to be lazy sometimes! Everyone burns out, and that doesn’t make you less than anyone. Take your time and focus on yourself. Do things that bring you joy.

- Embrace mistakes; they’re essential for growth and give you more experience to handle adversity with confidence. Remember, everyone makes mistakes, so you’re never alone in that.

- You just got here! Calm down, breathe, chill, and relax. It’s okay not to have everything figured out right now. You’re going to find what’s meant for you—just enjoy the journey and have faith that everything will work out, no matter how hard things seem.

[sissylittlefeather]

6 with F

:)))

Hey hey! Thanks for being the first request for my 200 follower celebration! You didn't specify smut or fluff, so I did some fluff with a hint toward future smut, so you can let your imagination run wild, if you want to 😉

Warnings: none, really. One cuss word.

Prompt: "Oh, we're not married." With '74-'77 BDE

One of Elvis's favorite things to do with you was drive. He'd take you out to different places around town that were quiet and secluded, so you could talk or do other things. You'd been dating for a few months and time spent with him was always your favorite. He loved that he could be himself around you, and, for a little while, be able to take off the mask of performing that he often wore even when he wasn't on stage or touring. Every time he would call you and tell you to meet him downstairs in half an hour, you'd grab your purse and your shoes and sit outside in anticipation. He tried to drive a different car each time, and it became a bit of a game to guess which one he'd bring next.

Tonight, you're sitting outside your apartment in the cool night air waiting for him when he pulls up in a Cadillac Deville station wagon. It's not the first time he's brought this car. He likes to drive this one when he knows you'll need space. You roll your eyes and laugh to yourself. Elvis is not a man that anyone could ever accuse of subtlety. He pulls up and rolls the window down.

"Hey, doll. Need a ride?"

"Depends on where you're headed, sir." This is a game you play often.

"Anywhere you want, baby." You lean in his window and kiss him on the cheek. Then, you walk around the car and slide into the passenger side.

You ride for a while talking about nothing in particular. Eventually, you come to one of your favorite spots off the road and he turns. Once you're parked, he asks if you want to move to the backseat.

"I just wanna kiss ya without a steering wheel in the way." You smile and oblige, both of you sliding into the seat at the same time. He opens his arms and gestures for you to come closer. You scoot to him and he plants a deep kiss on your lips, slipping his tongue into your mouth. You continue this way for a while, with him wrapped around you, pressed together. As things start to heat up, your hands go to his belt buckle and you've almost got it undone when there's an emphatic knock knock on the window. You gasp and sit straight up.

"What the fuck?" Elvis growls under his breath. He rolls the window down to see a young male police officer.

"Umm sir, you can't, uh, park here."

"I think you'll find I can do most anything I put my mind to." Elvis waits for the young man to realize who he is, but he doesn't.

"I need your drivers license, please, sir." Elvis turns to you.

"Honey, will you look in the glove box and see if it's in there."

"Sure, baby." You slip out of the door, open the passenger side, and rummage through the glove compartment, careful to keep the gun that's in there hidden. Eventually, you locate a wallet that has an ID in it. You walk around the car to the cop. He's noticeably nervous.

"Your husband seems to think I should know who he is."

"Oh, we're not married. But you should know him." The cop takes the ID from you and looks down at it. His head snaps back up and then he looks down at Elvis in the car.

"You're..."

"Nice to meet you, son."

"I'm gonna... I'm just... this is just a warning..." Elvis smiles knowingly and gestures for you to get in the car. By the time you get back to your place on the seat next to him, the cop is apologizing and walking backwards away from the car.

"Have a good night..." He calls as he gets back to his patrol car. Elvis waves and rolls the window up.

"Now, where were we, doll?"

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

[somespicycheese]

I was writing things in the tags but it became too verbose.

This shit is existentially horrifying to me. As someone in roughly the same age bracket as OP I also grew up with peers who all had cell phones while I didn't. My parents' stipulation with me & my brothers was that we would get a cell phone when we got our driver's license, which to me makes sense.

Not all my peers were under constant surveillance by their parents, but many were. In every case where a friend wasn't constantly monitored by their parents, their situation was similar to that with my parents: They trusted their kids.

My parents raised my brothers and I to be self sufficient adults. We had our own bank accounts in high school, we did our own laundry. We didn't have to cook for ourselves but they made sure we knew how to feed ourselves (and we did all learn to bake since they wouldn't buy sweets for us regularly and so we learned to make our own).

When my brother and I were going off to college, my mom went with us to our freshman orientation, and they had some sort of parents event while the kids were doing something else. And what she told me about it was unfortunately not surprising but still incredibly concerning.

They asked the parents to all raise their hands, and started listing things their children would be doing on their own now. If their kid didn't know how to do the thing or otherwise didn't meet the criteria, they were told to lower their hands. And so they start listing things. Doing laundry. Having a bank account. Going to the doctor's. Making appointments.

Y'know, basic life skills.

By the end of the list only my mom and two other parents in the room had their hands up. Out of I think 35 people.

People aren't raising their kids to operate on their own. These kids are so dependent on their parents that they frequently fall flat on their faces the moment they're out of their parents' houses.

And do you wanna know the worst part?

I had friends up to my sophomore year of college who were still under their parents' surveillance.

Needless to say, I'm scared for the future.

here's my hot take about my generation and people younger than me (I'm 22 years old)

The reason current teenagers and people in their really early 20s are conservative on accident and have such shitty takes on the internet is because our generation was much more sheltered than previous generations and because we were raised to be ok with orwellian servailence and that is 100% the fault of our parents, Reagan Era kidnapping panics, and the rise of technology all coming together to prevent us from doing the sketchy shit that sends parents into panic mode but which is also completely fundemental to childhood development. If your parents had even a crumb of money to their name and even a shred of free time they started tracking your phone as soon as it was possible to. I did not experience this because my parents are actively trying to live like it's the 1990s and still have not gotten cell phones of their own, and did not let me have one until I was 18 years old and it was no longer their choice, but literally over half of my friends in middle and high school had their phones tracked by their parents at some point or other, and we would occasionally find this out, not because their parents told them, but when we were trying to do the aforementioned sketchy shit and their parent's car would pull up. And I would, like a reasonable person after finding this out, encourage my friends to just leave their phones at home, and their response would be "What if I get kidnapped" or "My parents are just trying to keep me safe"

This in my estimation has lead to a combination of kids being terminally online because they do have internet access and are better at deleting search history than their parents think they are, but don't have the freedom to go out and do shit without their parents' knowledge or consent, so they have the most privacy from the people who control their lives while they're on the internet, and kids not having the real world experiences they should have, not knowing how to connect with other people irl, not feeling comfortable leaving the house because of the horror story lies their parents told them to make them ok with the surveillance they were inflicting on their kids. Kids these days are growing up in the fucking panopticon when they should be out in the woods playing with knives or stealing cigarettes from their older sibling and going out to an empty parking lot to smoke them or whatever and that shit is sticking with them into adulthood. Things that were "tee hee we could get in trouble isn't this so fun and daring" in the 1990s and 2000s have become in the 2010s and 2020s things that are "If I do that without texting my parents some sort of lie to excuse where my location is my parent's car will pull up and I will get grounded for the next two weeks."

Like even when I was 19 I had a 16 year old friend who would volunteer their time at a food shelf and that's how we knew each other. We would talk about dungeons and dragons together, and the game store was 4 blocks from the food shelf. One day we left the food shelf earlier than they had told their parents they would and they got punished for that. We were literally just going to look at dungeons and dragons miniatures and dice, which was self evident if you could see where we started and how far we walked and where too. I have to assume that this isn't uncommon. It's wrong, but it's not uncommon.

[revengeofthelobotomyladies]

In England there's a theory test app, half the test is multiple choice on road safety/rules/signs etc and half on hazard perception

It's pretty easy to get a theory tests and you have up to 2 years after passing to get your license before you have to take it so most get it done straight away

The DVLA reckon it takes an average of 45 hours of practice with an instructor (at anywhere between £30-40 an hour) and 22 hours of private practice in your own car to pass with an average 48% pass rate (so technically you can be taught by a random but it's not reccomended lol)

It's near impossible to get a test for at least 7 months in the future (bc of covid and bots) so if you manage to get an official one it'll cost £62, otherwise you need to get a cancellation which can cost upwards of £120

Then your actual test is like 40+ minutes, 20 of independent driving (either using sat nav or road signs, they say on the day) and 20 minutes of instructed driving which involves pulling up on the left & setting off safely at least 6 times and then one of the 4 main manoeuvers (reverse into a bay/drive into a bay/parallel park or pull up on the right & reverse for 2 car lengths) but they can also ask you to do an emergency stop or a hill start on top of that

also 2 "show me, tell me" questions about general car things like how to check the tyre pressure, clean the front windscreen etc

Plus they have hundreds to test routes and it's randomised so you could end up with really good conditions and a great route or shitty conditions and a shitty route which balls you up

You're allowed 0 serious faults and up to 15 minor faults but you fail if you get more than 3 of the same fault, you can fail for all sorts like not driving in a bus lane when it's open etc (a lot is ridiculous stuff that normal drivers do)

Then insurance premiums are sky high when you pass and a lot won't insure you or want millions depending on the type of car

Plus you're very restricted in some senses lile you need separate tests for basically every type of vehicle now and if you learn automatic you have to do the test again if you wanna drive manual etc

so it's definitely not encouraging 😂

So I agree with the anon that says it's about time and money, thats definitely a major problem but they definitely do discourage you by making it so difficult to learn and pass, at least here they do idk about the rest of europe

(It's really interesting to see those videos where seasoned drivers try a modern driving test because they nearly always fail lol)

I would 100% fail there lmao

Here you can get your learners permit by studying on your own or in class. I got mine in high school at age 15 but I think you can attempt the test as early as age 14. You have to get 80% on the learners written test to obtain a learners license. Then you do the 6 (or more I don’t remember, I got my learners 15 years ago🫣) drives with the driver trainer. They give you a little card saying you’ve completed training and you present that when you go for the final road test. If you’re in high school you have to wait until you’re 16 to try, I can’t remember if there’s a wait time if you’re an adult. You’re supposed to be going on practice drives with a licensed driver in this time.

I had a horrible driver trainer who would scream at me and she really scared me out of driving and also no one had the time or energy to practice with me. So, I sat on my learners for 10 years before I went for my road test. It was kind of embarrassing because my training card was dated from like 2010 or something but it was still good I guess. You can practice as long as you need to. I pretty much just taught myself to drive. 😬

It only costs $55 dollars to go for the road test and there is a cancellation fee. If you fail you have to wait a little while before you can try again. It used to be even cheaper a few years ago at $22. Absolutely crazy.

Once you pass there are restrictions for about two years. If you have no incidents in the two years you’re good to go.

I think I’m a good driver compared to a lot of people here. Like it’s really bad here. But the province is like YOLO I guess… 😅😳

[demonicxfire]

I'm realizing only now...

That soon... everything will be over.

School, I mean.

And yeah, part of me wants it to be over, because it's being so hard.

But... this is the final year.

And that means... I'll never see my friends again, after it will be over.

And my best friend, at the end of the summer, will go away, because he will start university too.

Sure, we'll stay in contact. He promised me. But i'll still be alone

Because I chose to take at least a gap year, i'll stay here... completely alone.

I don't even know what to do in my life.

I really wanna try to become a game developer, so that one day... i'll be able to create my dream game.

Tho, I also really love writing... and taking photos...

So, I still gotta understand what i want to do.

I also really want a dog...

Because i feel like, when my best friend will leave for university, i will fall... into a deep, dark hole.

I was once really good at socializing... but now i'm entirely closed in myself.

But now, all i'd want... is just someone to never leave me. Even a friend.

That's why I want a dog so badly...

Ugh, I feel like I shouldn't have declined the possibility i had at the end of my 4th school year...

Since then, I regret declining it...

But the thing is... I didn't feel ready.

But now i regret that decision...

Tbh... I feel like I won't actually get a dog at least until I'll finish university...

And I feel like I'm focusing too much on the future, and too little on the present... as always...

So, for now... I guess that I should really focus on the exams, of which i'll have the first two (out of 4) in less than weeks... and then the other 2.

But, looking a bit further that...

I'm planning to start a part-time job at the end of the summer, as well as taking the driver's license, and maybe even start hitting the gym again.

And now I realize why having a dog, if I should really do all this, would be impossible...

And I'm also realizing that... it probably won't be just one gap year.

For me, i'll have at least two gap years, or 3, depending on how it goes.

I firstly have to understand what the fuck i really wanna do in life...

But what if I find out too late?

It means that i won't be able to do the entrance test in that same year, but i'll have to wait one more year, because i know for sure that... studying for even just the entrance test... it will take me around a year.

So... yeah... i chose a really complicated path.

But i should really focus on the exams now...

I will really miss my friends... I've been feeling down in these days because of this...

5 years... and even tho i've been such an introvert... I still have really good memories with them.

I swear, i've never cried for this occasions, because why should I? I've always been bullied, and so i've been super happy every time i finished a kind of school.

But this time... it hit very differently...

Because i actually had very good memories with all of them.

I... ugh...

I've been feeling such a variety of emotions today... from sadness, to laughing, to nostalgia, etc...

And this has been a very long post...

I wish I could stop time tho... or even rewind it...

But we can't. And all we can do is to "rewind it" via our memories, and by understanding our errors.

Even tho, every remembering is destined to fade away... in the end...

[sticky943]

i might also add, you are also the problem if you recognize the parents are abusive but then go "in 15 years, those parents are going to wonder why their child never speaks to them after they moved out" or "those parents are going to have a lot of fun in the nursing home." you are part of the problem if you think the proper, courageous response to abusive parents is "your child is going to go no contact with you in the future and never let you see their grandkids."

you're literally watching a child (be they 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, or 9) being assaulted, locked up, beaten, yelled at, insulted, attacked, spanked right this second. And you think the proper solution is to have the child wait 10-15 more years until they've "grown up" and become an adult and THEN do something about it? You actually think children should be forced to put up with this abuse for 10-15 more years before they can actually do anything? Go tell a 5-year old girl being beaten up by their abusive parents right now "Don't worry, in 13 years when you turn 18, you get to move out and never look back uwu." I dare you.

You blokes honestly think that stops abusive parents? Sitting on the fence, being a passive bystander, waiting until the child is an adult after years of severe abuse, and just leave it to the child all by themself to figure out how to break free? HOW ABOUT REMOVING THE CHILD AND GETTING THEM OUT NOW YOU IDIOTS?! Some parents also literally murder children before age 18. Go travel back in time and tell those kids "Once you move out you'll be able to put them in the retirement home and cut ties with them" and tell the parents "In 10 years, your child is going to go no contact with you." Again. I defy you to do so.

And don't get me started on how you don't just magically become able to walk out of the house, have a job, have your own driver's license, and have your own apartment by the time you're 18. Also, if you wanna go to college, you literally HAVE to rely upon your parents for financial aid, which they could easily deny from you if they please.

STOP WITH THE "huhuhu those abusive parents are gonna wonder why their child never talks to them in the nursing home after they move out" "JOKES." THEY ARE NOT FUNNY OR ANTI-ABUSE. THEY ENABLE ABUSE AND ALLOW ABUSIVE PARENTS TO GET AWAY WITH IT. THESE "JOKES" TREAT JUSTICE AS SOMETHING THAT CAN BE DELAYED FOR CHILDREN. THEY IMPLY CHILDREN DON'T DESERVE JUSTICE UNTIL THEY'VE "GROWN UP" AND REACH 18. THEY IMPLY CHILDREN DON'T DESERVE BASIC HUMAN RIGHTS TO SAFETY, JUSTICE, AND ABILITY TO ESCAPE UNTIL FAR INTO THE FUTURE (at which point their parents may have killed them). THESE "JOKES" SEND THE MESSAGE THAT A LIGHT SLAP-ON-THE-WRIST LIKE "huhuhu have fun in the nursing home and never talking to your kid again huhhu" IS AN APPROPRIATE RESPONSE TO 10-15 YEARS OF VIOLENCE, ASSAULT, PRIVACY INVASION, INSULTS, DEGRADATION, ETC.

ABUSIVE PARENTS DON'T DESERVE THE RETIREMENT HOME AND NO CONTACT. THEY DESERVE TO BE ARRESTED AND PUT IN PRISON RIGHT THIS INSTANT. HELP THOSE CHILDREN ESCAPE THEIR ABUSERS RIGHT THIS SECOND. OR ELSE YOU'RE ALLOWING ABUSE TO HAPPEN. STOP. TREATING. CHILDREN. LIKE. PRE-PEOPLE.

if your first thought upon hearing that a child gets abused or mistreated by their family is “what did the child do to deserve it/you can’t blame them, it’s hard being a parent,” you. are. the. problem.

there is nothing that a CHILD can do that warrants getting hit or being called useless and pathetic every day. there’s nothing that warrants manipulation and violence, there’s nothing that warrants being put down and assaulted like that.

if your first thought when someone confides in you that something horrible happened to them due to a family member or otherwise is “well, did you deserve it?” you are the problem. you. are. the! PROBLEM! fucks sake

[fainthedcherry]

Mental Health Awareness month is tomorrow. So have a post in my timezone for the 1st of may an hour ahead, so I won't have to post tomorrow.

It's crazy, how calmed my parents are now. It's as if they've never yelled or argued with me over not being able to get a job, now that I had been given the chance. Why weren't they just as patient as that before?? I doubt it would've hurt to have been kind to me whilst I was going through a mentally taxing time. Kinda annoyed with them, I admit. But I'm just glad they stopped mentally wearing me down. I really need my mental stability, if I wanna convince them to take me in. I've been preparing a script in my head for several days now, to hopefully ease the anxiety that is asking me why I want a job without answering, "I just don't wanna be home and earn money to get a car and driver's license man, no magic behind it." I honestly wish, that getting employed would be just as easy as the snap of a finger, as it is for me to draw. I have. So many useless talents I never use, it's kinda sad, almost, y'know? I'm a social wreck due to years worth of being put into a bad place with all the bullying I endured, and breaking that shell apart now, to try and become a capable and social being is just so much harder due to it. I'm really trying, but I still fail at keeping my cool once I'm home. I nearly break down each time I go outside. That mental pressure of people judging me, like I was for a literal century (I'm not even exaggerating), hasn't faded, only worsened.

I hope that the help I'm getting now, can reverse that. It's not like I hate talking to people. Once I start, I can't shut up until my own voice becomes rasp. I can literally talk for hours. To no end. It's just so much harder, when no one wants to listen, or whenever I close myself off for a while to do my best to keep my ego in check and try to stay a good person. It's hard to be nice, when I was worn down for so long by the world itself.

^Man all this angst-dump would make killer midwest lyrics though. Maybe I'll update you tomorrow with that. I can't play my guitar that well yet, but maybe, some day. I might just become a musician like Cavetown..Where people can seek refuge and relate and understand. I just honestly want people to feel safe near me. But it's hard due to all the trust-issue I had to endure from friends who've backstabbed me. Way too many have.

But yeah, I think I'll leave this pondering for now to the future tomorrow. I honestly wanna draw some venty art for this entire month? As I don't have 30 mermaids for Mermay, I only have like...3 mermaid characters, which for my standard of being obsessed with fairytale creatures, is a lot. lmao. I might continue doing this. Just. Being honest with people and like..I guess conversing to a mirror? No one but myself listening? Is kinda nice. I usually shut myself up immediately and can't cope at all due to it. Maybe if I re-learn to trust and appreciate a side of me, I've long pushed away, for the sake of presenting myself as a mentally-stable person online, just maybe, I'll feel much more true to myself. Currently I just feel like the worst person on earth, as I've gotten super needy, with the need to be recognized and acknowledged by the world. I want to be someone. But we all want to be someone, at the end of the day.

I'm not sure if tagging this is a good idea? But I honestly also wonder, if someone out there can seek comfort, in such texts, where just a person overthinks their life and ponders. Maybe I should make that the hashtag too, beside mental health awareness month. Maybe look out for some sketches in the coming may? Unless of course, I get busy, I always do and I know it, so I can't really commit to monthly challenges as I'd like to. But hey, chin up, for the fact that I always try, despite knowing I won't get to the finish-line. It's better than doing nothing and being nobody.

[purplesurveys]

1629

Have you ever been cut off by a bartender because you were too drunk? Maybe not by a bartender but by friends, yeah. Hasn’t happened since college though; I’m super chill with my alcohol these days.

Have you ever borrowed money from your mom and lied about why you needed it? Nah I could never lie about things like that haha, given we weren’t the most well-off of families when I was growing up and for many years the money my parents made was just enough to keep us comfortable. If I didn’t have any allowance left that was on me. Have you ever flirted with a cop to get out of a ticket? Not flirt, but I have cried LOL. Surprisingly always works. In my first few weeks driving I also used my college-student and I-just-got-my-license cards to get out of tickets. A few times I’ve gotten pulled over away from my city and apparently it also works when you just say you’re not from the area and are not familiar with the traffic rules over there.

Have you ever lied during a job interview? No. Again, I am awful at lying. I also don’t wanna potentially overpromise because what if I say I can do Photoshop and they suddenly make me do visuals? Hahahaha.

Have you ever bought alcohol for someone underage? Nah. I also wouldn’t voluntarily get alcohol for someone under 18.

Have you ever started a rumor to ruin someone’s reputation? I’ve never started a rumor at all. People who do that must be so bored...

Have you taken any pics of yourself that you won’t want your parents to see? Yeah huh.

Would you turn a family member in if you see them commit murder? This is one of those situations wherein it’d be really hard to make a decision you’re likely to do, unless you’re already in it. That said, the way I see it now is I’m likely to turn a relative in if I’m not super close with them or if they’re actually a distant relative altogether. I mean...it’s murder.

Do you feel accepted by your BF/GF’s family? I don’t have a partner. Have you ever trashed your ex’s car after an argument? No. Would you leave a note on a car claiming responsibility if you damaged it? Not me as I haven’t bumped into any car while the driver was gone, but this happened to my car while in college. I had just finished a class and was headed back to my car when there was a note on the windshield of someone admitting they had hit my car and they were willing to discuss reimbursements and whatnot. Anyway, the damage wasn’t bad (paint just got chipped a bit) so I never reached out to the dude anymore.

Have you ever used someone's handicapped parking pass to get a parking spot? I would never do that, not even if I were already late at a BTS concert and was struggling to find a parking spot hahaha.

If you ran over an animal would you keep driving? Depends on the animal, the type of road etc. I wouldn’t stop for like, a squirrel or a mouse or a pheasant, but I’d 100% stop for a dog or cat. < Same.

Do you really care about saving the planet for future generations? I do my part when I can but it’s not actively because it’s for ‘the future generation.’ I’m a little...emotionless in that regard lol.

What was the first thing you learned how to cook? That wasn’t frozen? Erm...eggs.

What are some wild animals commonly found where you live? Frogs and...yeah that’s pretty much it.

Do you think there will ever be world peace? No.

Have you ever turned down a job offer? I had wanted to turn down a promotion before but didn’t really have a choice.

Do you know anyone who believes that vaccines cause autism? Not that necessarily, but my dad’s parents are deep in the disinformation echo chamber and are in the belief that vaccines can kill you, can cause heart attacks, can inevitably give you fatal allergic reactions, etc. They would never have gotten their Covid vaccine shot if not for my dad forcing them to, and they never even got their second shot and boosters. It’s a situation I’ve always felt sorry for and frustrated about.

What does the name say on your birth certificate? Just my full name lol, which I’m not sharing.

In terms of politics, do you sit on the right or the left? Left.

Out of all those blood related, immediate or other, which single person would you list as your favorite? Either my dad or my eldest cousin on my mom’s side.

Who is one you wish you didn't share blood with? I have in-laws I don’t super want to associate with, but I don’t feel this way about any blood relatives.

Generally, what genre of movies do you jump at the opportunity to see? Dramas. Not a genre per se, but classic Hollywood movies too.

Have you ever been able to pet a normally wild animal, like a tiger or dolphin? Yups.

If you had a work office that you would be allowed to decorate any way you want, how would you decorate it? It’d be pet-friendly, have bars for pizza and coffee, and the walls would be littered with art/paintings.

Do you know anyone who is a Native American? Nope.

What was the hardest thing you went through in your childhood? Being led to believe that your family drinking enough to get drunk every night is normal.

Have you ever had a girlfriend? Yeah.

Do you have any close friends that were adopted? I know someone who is but they aren’t a friend.

Does your mom eat meat? Yups, she does.

Was your dad ever on a sports team? Not a sports team but if I remember correctly he was part of his high school’s dance troupe or something like that. My dad is actually crazy talented and smart; he just never talks about the awesome shit he did when he was younger. I didn’t know he knew how to dance and play the guitar until I was a teenager; and I definitely did not know he had planned on taking up engineering rather than hotel and restaurant management until well into my 20s (he didn’t pursue it as he couldn’t afford the school that was known for its engineering courses).

Who has the prettiest middle name you know? I’m not sharing whose it is but I have a friend whose second name is Lorenza, which I’ve always found really pretty.

What’d be your name if you took your mom’s middle name? Her second name? Patricia.

Do you know a lot of things about the opposite sex’s body parts? Uhhhhhh not so much. We had to take it up once in like Grade 5 science but I immediately forgot most of it. I can tell you like 3-4 organs maybe, but I wouldn’t be able to tell you what each would be responsible for hahaha.

What is your least favourite thing about your full name? I can’t think of anything I dislike about my name.

What’s your favourite kind of poptart? Chocolate fudge. We only get like 4 flavors imported here and that one’s my favorite. S’mores and cookies and cream are too sweet; and of course I’m never touching the strawberry variant lol.

When did your family immigrate to wherever you live now? I already live in the country where I’m from.

Do you enjoy watching birth vlogs? Not really? The only birth vlogs I’ve cared to watch are high-profile people who have released their own lol like Kylie Jenner.

Do you know anyone else with your name? A few. Which country’s flag is your favorite? I don’t have a favorite.

What would you be most afraid of happening if you were to visit Africa? What I’d be afraid of going to any other country, I guess? Like getting scammed, kidnapped, raped, harassed, etc.

Do you ever take pictures of negative moments? I used to do this – I very distinctly remember taking a black-and-white photo of the sky in 2017 during my more s*****al days, and it stayed in my phone for years supposedly with the intent to remind me that things would get better. But all it taught me was it does just that – remind. It took me back and seemed to only taunt me that I was going to regress. So I stopped taking photos of bad experiences and, in contrast, have actually made it a point to not keep souvenirs of bad days whatsoever.

Would you ever post a picture of yourself crying on social media? If it was crying in a humorous context then yeah. I posted a photo of myself in tears (but also pulling a funny face) right after watching the music video for Jin’s The Astronaut hahaha. 

Have you ever held a newborn baby? I held one of my cousins when he was like 2 weeks old (I was 9), and very nearly dropped him while nobody was watching because he started squirming and crying. That was the first and last time I ever held a baby. Too scary.

Do you know anyone who has twins? I know several sets of twins, but not anyone around my age who has them.

Are you following in the career path of any family members? Kind of. My maternal great-grandpa and grandpa are writers, and my mom has cousins who’ve worked in media and broadcast and, by extension, in the study of law; I’ve been told the love for writing really runs in my mom’s side. What’s funny to me I guess is how the talent completely skipped over my parents as both my mom and dad ended up in the hospitality industry hahaha.

Do you feel you missed out on a lot as a kid? Quite, yeah. My mom worked graveyard shifts for years, and my dad was already working abroad way before I even had the capacity to remember. I didn’t necessarily feel sad about it when I was a kid because I thought that was normal; but when I started hearing my friends talk about their summer family outings and how they’d have dinners at the mall every Sunday, that’s when it started to feel like my life was lacking.

Who was that best friend you ever had? Angela’s always been my BEST best friend.

Do you have people in your family who want you dead? Gee...not that I know of, at least?

Honestly, if you could have anyone in the world, who would it be? Kimi. I wish I could have had him forever.

What do you usually order at Taco Bell? All the few Taco Bells we do have in the country are too far from where I live, so I never get. But when I happen to be in those handful of areas, I always just get some kind of burrito. Have you ever streaked? Nopes.

How many city/towns have you lived in? Two – Manila, and my current one.

Do you prefer to shower at night or in the morning? Night. So much comfier to sleep then.

Have you ever wanted to be a ballet dancer? I didn’t, but I did take ballet as a kid. Didn’t fare well though as my parents were immediately advised that I wasn’t cut out for the craft hahaha. I’ve shared this with friends and they always go, “That’s so harsh!” but honestly I feel like it was just right to do so. Ballet has some crazy rigid standards and it was only fair to give my parents the heads-up early on, before they’d start investing more money for what was already a lost cause.

When was the last time you really laughed? Watching Cong’s newest vlog last night.

Honestly, whose numbers do you have memorized? My sister’s and my mom’s. Do you sleep with socks on? No.

Has anyone ever told you, you were beautiful? Yeah.

What kind of house do you want? It’s gonna defeat the whole purpose of the movie but I’m honestly such a big fan of the house in Parasite LOL. Minus the [insert the part of the house that’s instrumental in the plot twist].

Would you like living on the coast? It would be nice as a vacation home; but given that living on the coast largely implies living in the province, I’d much rather stay in the city.

What would you like your generation to change? I wish they had more initiative and gave a bigger shit about their jobs. The other Gen Zers I work with will only ever do what you ask them to do, which can be so frustrating sometimes. 

Are you a sore loser? I can be but I keep it internal and just use the loss as a motivation to win or succeed next time. A 25-year-old lashing out at losing is ridiculous.

Honestly, do you enjoy arguing? Nope.

Have you ever wanted a Nikon camera? Or do you have one already? I had one! I had a ~photography phase when I was like 12 and my dad gave me a Nikon DSLR so I can improve at it. Turns out the skill actually belonged to my sister, who ended up using the camera throughout her time in film school many years later.

Are you a picky eater? What’s one food you refuse to eat? I’m not picky about entire foods in general; it’s just that I have very specific ways of enjoying my food, if that makes sense? I’ll rarely entirely refuse to eat a certain food, but, like, I will always remove the pickles from cheeseburgers, will always remove the hotdog bits from my spaghetti, will skip over chicken meat because all I really want is the fried chicken skin hahaha, etc.

Do you have Photoshop? If so, how often a day do you use it? I don’t have Photoshop on here and I never learned how it works.

What color are the walls in the room you’re in right now? White. Do you use your queen right away in chess? I don’t know how to play chess.

Were you in track and field? For just one year in grade school lol yep.

Were you ever in a school talent show? Nope.

Have you thrown up in a car? Just once. I threw up on my mom’s stomach...while she was pregnant. We were on a different car than what we were usually riding, and my motion sickness that day just wanted to rear its ugly head.

Who was your first grade teacher? Her name was Merce.

Where did you go on your first airplane ride? Boracay when I was 11.

Whose wedding were you in the first time you were a bridesmaid or a groomsmen? Does a junior bridesmaid count? It was a quirk of my mom’s best friend’s wedding and I was around 7 when it happened.

First tattoo or piercing? First and only piercings were my earlobes when I was a few months old. Don’t have tattoos.

First celebrity crush? Zac Efron.

[thedauntlessmundane]

I had fun today. I went to DMV to take my behind the wheel test and I passed. Finally after 2nd attempt.

I actually not feeling well today. I think I have stomach ache or I can’t explain. I feel discomfort in my gut. I think I might be a sign that I can do it and I will pass my test. It’s just my gut feeling lol #intuition

In addition

I got to bond with my brother-in-law I think? I don’t know what to call him. He’s my husband’s cousin.

Here how it goes…

I asked my BIL if he could lend me his car and if he could go with me to DMV to take my behind the wheel test and he said “I can take ya”.

He picked me up around 9 am. I told him I’m not feeling well and I got stomach ache. He ask me “Are you nervous?” I told him maybe I am but actually I feel okay or maybe numb lol. Were just chatting all the way to the DMV office. I practiced for about 30 minutes around the area. I kinda remember the route before because this is my 2nd attempt and it’s still fresh to my memory. I honestly enjoyed his company. We parked and ready to go inside the DMV to register for BTW test. I told him I can go inside by myself and he told me “Nah I’ll go with you inside” I feel his support all the way. He motivates me and he believes in me. The way he told me “I believe in you, zelle”. I feel so touched. I need this kind of word of affirmation. “I trust in you, I know you can do it.” He’s very a loving and caring guy, I bet his future wife is very lucky. I feel nervous now. When I saw my instructor she’s kinda intimidating. But luckily she’s really nice I could tell. My driving test took me 10 minutes only because I think I show her my drivers license back to my original country. When I come out from the car I saw my BIL waiting for me outside and he’s smiling. My smile is super wide like it reaches my ears. “You passed?” And told him “Yaaaah I passed!” I jumped and still nervous. He hugged me. He’s so happy for me. He told he’s going to treat me lunch. For me ohhhh it’s a date. But nawwww it’s just a family lunch. We talked a lot about his family which is I didn’t get to know about it with my husband, because he doesn’t wanna talk about his family. He’s always like yelling at me or mad or whatever. We spend like 2 hrs inside the restaurant talking random things. We went to costco to do grocery shopping because he has membership. We take our time and he didn’t even put pressure on me. When it comes to shopping I wanna take my time but my husband is not like that. Whatever we need to buy that’s it. I always in a hurry with him. But my BIL he’s chill and just be with me all the time. He pays attention and listen to me everytime I talked which I cannot get it when I talk to my husband. The way he lecture me or teaching me driving I really like. I really appreciate him. I hope his attitude is same with my husband. I liked him. I always looking forward to see him everytime we have family gathering or weekend night out. I wish I could travel with him. I wish I get to know him more.

[heinrichveras]

17 YEAR OLD ME,

At this point, I've experience a many things that makes a teenager. I wanna try something more exciting at this age like doing what teenager do but I put some boundaries on it. And at this age I learn many things like drinking alcohol going home late and many more. And experiencing something that I thought I was not ready for but here I survive and starting to make my the best version of my self.

And at this age I travel a lot meeting new people making good memories and going out to my comfort zone learning new things choosing friends that will held me to the good path, making wise decision on my life. And at the age of 17 I slowly getting my confidence playing in the big league of basketball learning from the best and keep striving to improve my my self being a basketball player and maybe one day basketball can help me to achieve my dream.

"ONE DAY ALL THE HARD WORK WILL PAY OFF!"

16 YEAR OLD ME,

Turning 16 is big deal to most teens. Not only does their freedom expand with the addition of a driver's license, but they also are becoming more cognizant of what they want to do in their future. Those who plan to attend college may be visiting universities or preparing to take the appropriate standardized tests.

As for parenting, 16-year-olds can bring both joy and frustration to their parents and caregivers. Along with all the reasons for immense pride in how your teen is growing up and accomplishing goals, there are bound to be a few struggles along the way too. On the one hand, you might get to see your teen land the starring role in a musical, earn a spot on a sports team, get a driver’s license, or make the honor roll. On the other hand, there also might be academic challenges, risky behaviors, or straight-up rudeness, none of which are easy to deal with.

15 YEAR OLD ME,

This is a time of changes for how teenagers think, feel, and interact with others, and how their bodies grow. Most girls will be physically mature by now, and most will have completed puberty. Boys might still be maturing physically during this time. Your teen might have concerns about her body size, shape, or weight. Eating disorders also can be common, especially among girls. During this time, your teen is developing his unique personality and opinions. Relationships with friends are still important, yet your teen will have other interests as he develops a more clear sense of who he is. This is also an important time to prepare for more independence and responsibility; many teenagers start working, and many will be leaving home soon after high school.

14 YEAR OLD ME,

Fourteen can be a pivotal age for both young people and their parents or caregivers. Not only are many 14-year-olds just beginning high school, but they also are heading down the path toward becoming a healthy, responsible adult. This can be both exciting and challenging—for both of you.

At this age, many 14-year-olds are developing their unique identity, gaining independence, and likely exploring (or thinking about) romantic relationships. That can be a lot to take in as a parent. But, by providing plenty of supportive guidance and helping them gain the skills they need for a successful future, you both can weather this transition seamlessly.

And at this age I didn't enjoy it much because of the virus that makes the whole world into crisis at this age I'm just home thinking what memories I've done if there's no virus and no lockdown maybe I learn new things again.

13 YEAR OLD ME,

As your child makes the transition from being a 12-year-old kid to a 13-year-old adolescent, you are bound to see some interesting changes. Not only will your child be making a mental shift as they begin to view themself as a teenager, but they also will be experiencing a variety of physical and emotional changes as well. For instance, your 13-year-old may become sensitive to their changing bodies or take notice of the changes in their peers if they are slower to develop.This realization may cause them to worry that they are different or abnormal in some way—especially if they are not growing body hair or have not hit a growth spurt yet. They also will be experiencing a variety of emotional changes they begin to spend more time with their peers. They may also struggle to think about the consequences of their behavior before they act. This has to do with different parts of their brains develop at slightly different rates.

12 YEAR OLD ME

A 12-year-old’s brain may have stopped growing in size, but it’s nowhere near done developing. Abstract thinking, problem-solving, and logic are all becoming easier. “They show improvement in reasoning and information processing as they continue to mature,” says Chris Cardona-Correa, MD, an adolescent medicine fellow at the University of Minnesota. “The young adolescent may demonstrate the capacity for long-range planning, and the ability to consider other points of view and feelings, and this capacity continues to develop as they grow older."

However, the prefrontal cortex, which is the part of the brain that plays a role in impulse control and organizational skills, is still maturing. So don’t be surprised if your 12-year-old engages in some potentially impulsive behavior.By 12, most children have a strong command of language and communication skills. They are able to think beyond literal interpretations, and proverbs and idioms won’t fly over their heads anymore.

11 YEAR OLD ME,

Eleven-year-olds are also beginning to realize that there are multiple ways to look at a piece of information, situation, or issue, and they start to understand that there is a gray area where there was previously only black and white. “Cognitively, children nearing middle school mature in their abilities to think through problems, plan, and organize; they also learn to think less concretely and more flexibly about how the world works,”

Some of this progress comes down to the development of your 11-year-old’s executive function skills, which are a combination of the cognitive, communication, motor, and sensory skills that will continue to mature into your child’s 20s. They start to understand more fully the consequences of their actions, can be more responsible with chores, and can better empathize and understand the perspectives of other people.

10 YEAR OLD ME

As children reach the age of 10, many will start to think of themselves as being almost teenagers. While some 10-year-olds will start looking and acting more mature, others will remain more child-like, both physically and emotionally. Ten-year-olds are emerging adolescents. Their bodies and brains are going through these tremendous changes," explains Aliza Pressman, PhD, an assistant clinical professor of pediatrics and psychologist at Mount Sinai Kravis Children’s Hospital in New York City. This transformation can be startling for parents and also unsettling for their children.

However, regardless of how old they may look or seem, don't forget (even if they do) that they are still children in need of parental support and guidance. In fact, they may need their parents more than ever. Being 10 is all about change. Their bodies, hormones, emotions, social circles, and skills are all in flux this year. It is a period of monumental transition that can offer challenges and delights as children start to embrace the approach of the tween years. For many children, the development phase around 10 years old is packed with learning and rapid-paced cognitive growth. Right before your eyes, your child may seem to blossom from a little kid into a much bigger one with emerging critical thinking skills, huge advances in academic learning, a drive for independence, a growing social life, and a lot to say. They also begin to have a greater awareness of the perspectives of others and how they relate to their own.

9 YEAR OLD ME,

Nine-year-olds are maturing emotionally and becoming more cognitively advanced. They are continuing to grow taller and stronger and they may be mentally ready to excel in sports and other physical activities. But don't be surprised when they suddenly become tired, moody, or change interests day-to-day. Age 9 can be a bit of a roller coaster, and we are here to help guide you through it. At 9 years old, you'll continue to witness lots of language growth in your child as well as cognitive developments. Let's break them down. By age 9, the baby-talk of earlier years is mostly gone. Nine-year-olds can mostly speak with the same grammatical patterns as adults, and people who don't know your child well will generally be able to understand them. You may find yourself more interested in reading your child's homework assignments at this age. Nine-year-olds can effectively express themselves in writing.

8 YEAR OLD ME,

Age 8 can be a magical year. It's the year that your little kid really becomes a big kid. Middle childhood is a time of physical, mental, and emotional growth. It's possible you'll notice that your child no longer asks for your help with their homework and they may be wanting to spend more time with their friends. Eight-year-olds are becoming more independent and more mature. You may be pleased to see that they begin to show genuine empathy for others and start to put others first in situations that they haven't before, such as happily letting a younger sibling go first in a family game. This age is not without its challenges, but overall, it tends to be a peaceful and enjoyable year between children and their parents.

Here, we'll break down all you need to know about your 8-year-old's development emotionally, socially, and physically, as well as brief your on safety tips and when certain concerns might warrant a call to your child's pediatrician.

[pastelmoonprism]

Ya‘ll, I‘m sorry for taking so long with the update on this one, but it‘s here!

CW: Food & Calories are mentioned.

🌸 Getting my driver’s license!

Not gonna lie, this turned out harder than expected. We have to basically wait a few months until we get an appointment for the practical exam, which is currently delaying my progress super hard. I had one opportunity to do the exam yet, but I ended up failing due to me being super nervous and the exam taking place super early in the morning, which is not a time that I‘m usually awake, making it harder for me to focus.

I‘ll just try again in 2024, let‘s go!

🎀 Becoming an intuitive eater!

This one is going super well, actually. I rarely count calories these days, which is a great thing! Super proud of myself. 🩷

🍥 Staying in touch with people I enjoy spending time with!

Not gonna lie, I feel like I‘m in a super good place with this goal right now. During 2023, I realized that I prefer a good mixture of going out with friends every now and then but also spending a lot of time with myself. I‘m currently in a position in which I‘m rather clear on what amount of time I want to spend with which people, which makes me feel really good!

🩰 Stop caring about what other people think!

I‘m still in the process of tackling this goal. I feel like it‘s getting better but, depending on the time of the month, I still get quite anxious when I notice that people are staring at me or I notice that I avoid certain situations in which my looks might be judged. I‘m planning to start with therapy really soon, maybe this is something that I get to work on with a professional!

🦩Invest time into stuff that I enjoy as well as self-care.

At this point, I really enjoy the way I‘m spending my time. I realized that the definition of self-care expands to more than just taking a bath or doing skin care and that what I consider truly self care are the more simple things in life: sitting in front of my cute pink setup and playing video games all evening while drinking my cute pink energy drink, browsing through Tumblr in the evening, looking at cute pink pictures while eating my pink chocolate or just watching my favorite tv show while I eat my comfort food is what I truly consider self care.

I make sure to do all of these things almost every day so that I can include some me-time in my daily routines.

🍧 Start journaling!

I actually journal every morning and every evening at this point and I‘ve noticed that it helps me stay clear & focused. I also feel like I‘m able to process my feelings way better when I verbalize them and write them down.

💞 Tackle all of my open video games!

While my „hall of shame“ in Steam certainly has gotten smaller, I feel like I shouldn‘t push myself to play games just to get done with them, so I decided to drop this goal. In the future, I‘ll just make sure to not buy new games unless I‘m really sure that I‘ll be able to play them soonishly.

And that‘s it with my 2023 resolutions, thank you so much for taking the time to read through all of these! I‘m really grateful for all the support I‘ve received on here as well as over on IG over the course of the last year, thank all of you so much! 💕

I‘m currently not planning to do a post about my 2024 resolutions as, tbf, I don‘t really have any, haha. I just wanna see where this year is taking me and will focus on further improving my mental health, together with some trained professionals.

Wishing you all the best and remember: you‘re cute, you‘re valuable, you‘re worthy of all the love and respect out there! 💞

New Year's Resolutions 2023

My first ever "personal" post, kind of exciting to be honest! (๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ

Over the course of the last couple of days, I had a lot of thoughts about what I'd want to accomplish within the next year. Given that I started to use Tumblr as my main social media platform recently, I thought it'd be fun to share them here.

CW: Food & Dieting are mentioned!

They're not in a specific order, just how they came to my mind! ┐(‘～` )┌

🌸 Getting my driver's license! 🎀 Healing my relationship with food / working towards becoming an intuitive eater instead of counting calories. 🍥 Put more effort into maintaining relationships / staying in touch with people I enjoy spending time with! 🩰 Stop caring on what other people think so much. 🦩 Invest more time in stuff that makes me happy! 💕 Tackle all the open video games I still have in my library (if I'm still interested in them). 🍧 Start journaling! 🌸 Invest more time into self care!

That should be more then enough for one year. (ᵔ.ᵔ) If you've made it till here, thanks a lot for reading these! If I remember (and am still active on Tumblr) by the end of this year, I'll go back to these and check how much I've accomplished.

I wish everyone on here a great 2023!

[rafescoke]

Need To Know (Part 2) ; Rafe Cameron

masterlist

#Part 2 

#Part 1

Pairing: Rafe Cameron x reader

Summary: Reader confronts Rafe about his past

Warnings: More angst, more flashback smut, substance, swearing, Rafe being a dick again

A/N: Thank you so much for the overwhelming love from my last post! I love you to the moon and back <3

p.s, my request box is always open for you to drop in any ideas!

“My god, you both look great.”

Rafe chuckled, too drunk to say anything, and wrapped his arms around his girlfriend of 4 months. The night breeze flew past everyone on the yacht as they strolled down the stream, moving their hips along to ‘Summer’ by Calvin Harris and trying to hear each other’s conversations over the loud music.

“Thanks, Tops,” (Y/N) smiled, feeling her body moving to the beat. She thought about the amount of drinks she had, but giggled when she had to recount again, and then frowned when she kept forgetting the number she ended on.

“What are you thinking?” Rafe whined, pulling her away from Topper who had his arms around another girl, trying to move on from his failed relationship with Sarah Cameron. He had told Rafe and (Y/N) that he have never felt better, but they both know the truth. He was completely wrecked after the breakup; when Topper found out about Sarah and a certain boy from the other side of the island, Rafe had to be there for him every single night until recently. He was too afraid of the things that Topper would do to himself.

“I can’t remember how many drinks I’ve had tonight,” she cried, tugging on his shirt as she placed her chin on his shoulder. Rafe laughed, patting her back before pulling her to face him.

“You had 8 shots. I had more.”

“Are you sure?” she asked, raising her brows. When she saw a smile slowly creeping onto his face, she groaned loudly.

“You always do this to me!” She grunted, but a tone of humor laced in her face. “God, I hate you.” She made a move to talk away, crossing her arms.

“No-” he shook his head, pulling her arm so that she will end right back into his arms again. He grinned when his tactic worked, “You don’t hate me. You love me too much.”

“Disgusting,” (Y/N) made a face, and stood on her toes to whisper into his ear. “Wanna do something?”

Rafe looked at her, and when he saw the sly smile etched onto her face, he kissed her fully on her lips, always admiring this side of her that she rarely shows to other people.

When he first found out about this opposite side of his girlfriend, Rafe couldn’t believe his eyes. He tried to convince himself that when she had asked to do coke with him for the first time that night, it was merely his imagination and not reality, but when she woke up next to him the next morning, the sun highlighting her hair and eyes, smiling shyly at him, he knew that it had, indeed, happened.

“You want to do coke?” he asked, forcing himself to keep his grin concealed. “Right now? In the middle of the party?”

(Y/N) hummed in response, and kissed his cheeks. “Please?”

Rafe didn’t answer her as he pulled her through the many dancing bodies to one of the back rooms in the yacht, trying to contain his excitement. The last time they had done this together ended up being one of the best nights of Rafe’s life, and he hoped to relive it again.

Rafe poured the intoxicating powder on the cold table, licking his pink lips as he separated them into four lines using his driver’s license. (Y/N) saw a glimpse of his handsome ID photo on the card, and tried to stop herself from kissing him. 

How could someone look so handsome in their driver’s license? It’s impossible.

(Y/N) licked the side of his face as he tried to balance the lines evenly, not able to contain her feelings anymore. She felt like having him for the rest of her life, and she can’t imagine spending her future with anyone else. 

“What was that for?” Rafe groaned, but he was smiling. (Y/N) wiped the already- drying wet mark on the side of his face with her sleeve, only to be stopped by Rafe’s fingers around her wrist.

“I didn’t say you could wipe it.”

(Y/N) giggled, kissing his cheeks as he returned back to his previous work. She wondered again on the never ending questions of why would Rafe choose her amongst the many girls who have tried to get his attention since forever, but her thought was disturbed by the sudden swift of Rafe’s lips against hers.

“Ladies first,” he whispered, handing her a rolled up hundred dollars bill. (Y/N) smiled, putting a light pressure on her left nostril using her pointer before dipping her head to inhale the substance.

She threw her head back, laughing when she could feel Rafe’s soft lips peppering wet kisses along her exposed neck. She closed her eyes against the warm feeling, her fingers running through his messy hair.

“Your turn, baby,” she giggled, stopping her boyfriend before they could provide a free show for everyone else. Rafe sighed, clearly unsatisfied, but he took the rolled up bill from her fingers and dipped his head.

Before he could inhale the white powder, he turned to look at her, a glinting mischief in his eyes. (Y/N) groaned, wanting to spend her hazy trip with her boyfriend instead of going ahead of him.

“What is it?”

“Lay on your back,” he said, not looking at her as he took out the extra mini ziplock bags. (Y/N) looked at him with a frustrated expression. “I swear to god, (Y/N), just fucking do it.”

(Y/N) sighed and laid her back against the sofa, trying to hold her skirt from lifting up and exposing her black thong she had bought beforehand. She widened her eyes when she felt Rafe’s cold rings grazing her skin, closing her eyes when she felt his hands slowly creeping towards her aching core.

“What are you doing?” She hissed, closing her legs quickly. “Rafe, we can’t do anything here.”

“Relax,” he whispered, pulling her legs apart again, and (Y/N) almost moaned from the sudden cold breeze nipping on her skin. She gripped on his wrist again, trying to remind and warn him about his next move at the same time.

Just by the glare that Rafe had given her, signaling that he wasn’t playing and he hadn’t got the time to joke around, she let go of his wrist, looking up to her boyfriend who was unlocking the mini bag.

She hissed when Rafe poured a perfect amount of cocaine on her lap, enough for him to get on by the night. She watched as he separated them into lines using his driver’s license again. She gulped, her heartbeat getting quicker.

“Stop moving so much,” Rafe grunted, focusing on perfecting the lines against her soft skin. After a few seconds of trying his best, he looked back to admire his work, licking his teeth.

“Oh my god, Rafe, you can’t be-”

“Shut up,” he said, taking the rolled up bill and dipping his head until he was on the same level as her head. She bit her lips, nervous. She threw her head back when Rafe inhaled a line, her heartbeat beating quicker than that time she tried to hide herself in Rafe’s closet from Rose. 

She could feel his fingers gripping her thighs, and she couldn’t deny the growing feeling inside her. Rafe chuckled, wiping his nose, and dipped his head back to the previous position.

“Rafe. . .” she whined, trying her best not to move around so much. The grip around her legs tightened, and she gritted her teeth as he placed wet kisses along her leg, ending directly before her desperate core.

“Oh my god,” she groaned, closing her eyes.

(Y/N) has experienced nothing of that sort, and the farthest thing they have done was fucking each other in Rafe’s hot tub that one drunken night. The last time she did coke with her boyfriend, no body parts were involved and it was only the two of them and her grandmother’s glass table.

Rafe chuckled, rubbing his nose as he resurfaced from his second last line, holding the rolled up bill between his fingers like a cigarette. “You like that, huh?”

“I’ve never wanted you to fuck me so bad before,” she said, groaning as she tried to keep her legs still for Rafe to inhale that one last line, but she knew he wouldn’t make her life that easy.

She watched as he kissed the inner of her thighs, going upwards, placing more kisses on her hips and again, directly halting before her core. Rafe could see the wet mark on her thongs, and could feel himself getting harder. 

“Please,” she begged, looking at him with her innocent eyes, her fingers wrapping around his wrist. “Please, Rafe, baby, please.”

“As you wish, princess.”

She went into another unexplainable feeling as he did his final line, and then  giving her more wet kisses along her thighs and lastly, that resulted her into jerking her body upwards towards his chest; he placed a strong kiss on her clothed core. 

Rafe laughed, watching her pressed herself against him, trying to find any kind of friction. “Relax, baby. I thought you wanted me to stop?”

“Fuck you,” she whispered, before climbing onto his lap and attacking him with kisses. 

“Okay-” he said in between kisses, “Fine-” more kisses, “Fuck me.”

(Y/N) groaned, feeling his hard member all pushed up against her as she kept on attacking him with kisses. This is exactly the problem; he would tease her and she would just not stop. 

“People are watching, baby,” he whispered, stopping her fingers from unzipping his jeans. They were both breathing really hard, and (Y/N) leaned closer to his ear.

“Let them.”

He groaned as she finally unzipped his pants, exposing his throbbing penis against the night air of North Carolina. He tried to pull his and (Y/N)’s body downwards by an inch to hide their ungodly behaviour behind the table, but was caught off guard when (Y/N) gripped his fingers, halting his movement.

“I said let them watch.”

Rafe wasn’t sure if it was the drugs that took over her or it was just another side of her that she was finally exposing to him, but he couldn’t deny the excitement coursing through his veins. This was every teenage boy’s wet dreams, and Rafe couldn’t believe the fact that he was finally experiencing it.

Before he could prepare himself, he felt her sink into him as she wrapped her arms around his neck, resting her forehead against his as she panted to reach her end. Rafe held her waist, not putting any pressure and letting her take control completely. He watched as she bit her lips, placing quick kisses against his neck.

“I love you, oh my god,” she said as she pushed herself down onto him, closing her eyes to concentrate on the familiar feeling growing in her stomach. “My perfect boy.”

“I’m close,” he shuddered, this time thrusting his hips against her to quicken the pace, feeling his end reaching. He didn’t care about the crowd that was starting to form near them; he was happy and content with the girl who was a moaning mess on top of him.

“Fuck-” she screamed as he released himself into her, falling against his chest to catch her breath. Rafe placed a lazy kiss against the top of her head as she grunted, too tired to even remove herself. 

“I wanna do coke with you every single night,” she whispered involuntarily as Rafe pulled her up, finally finding the strength to do so. He fixed her dress for her as she rested her head against the sofa, feeling so close to doze off for the night. Rafe smiled, tucking a strand of her hair before buttoning his jeans back again. He kissed her cheeks as she sighed, intertwining their fingers. 

“I’ll always love you, okay?” he said, but she was too tired to say anything back. She whispered something back, and Rafe laughed in return, and the night continued with her head against his chest as they snuggled up close on the sunbathing area. When the clock struck 12, they watched the fireworks decorating the night sky, and Rafe swore he had never seen anything more beautiful than (Y/N) under that glowing sky that particular night.

“Happy birthday, my love,” Rafe whispered, before placing a longing kiss on her lips.

(Y/N) woke up with a start.

She heard noises coming from her window, and she groaned before making her way towards the light. Her feet tapped lightly against her carpeted floor, feeling the cold temperature coming from outside.

Great. Just the person she wanted to see.

“Let me in, baby, please,” Rafe said against her window, fogging her glass. “Please? Let me explain myself.”

(Y/N) held her middle finger up to him before returning to her bed, watching the panicking boy from the corners of her eyes.

How could he climb up to her room after all the things he did to her?

“Oh my god-” she heard him speak, “It’s cold out here. Please? Let me in.” 

(Y/N) tried to block out his voice as she placed her pillows against her ears, but when she kept hearing his pleads, she couldn’t shake the bad feeling in her heart. She stood up from her bed, watching Rafe struggling to hold on to a branch, and opened the window, all while silently cursing to herself.

Rafe quickly shut the windows and sighed as he got used to the warm atmosphere, his eyes following the girl as she returned back towards her bed. Rafe stayed shut, following her actions, and sat beside her limp body.

“I’m-”

“I don’t want to talk to you,” she cut him off, and Rafe watched as she shifted to get comfortable. She wasn’t looking at him, and Rafe felt a pang of pain across his heart.

“Please, baby, you deserve an explanation.”

(Y/N) stayed quiet, and Rafe took the silence as an agreement. He ran his fingers through his hair a few times, trying to find his voice; because this is exactly the problem -

He didn’t know how much more (Y/N) had heard from his ex’s mouth, but based on the quick summary that she had given him through the phone call an hour ago, everything that she told him was true.

Because he was stupid. He was selfish, and he didn’t believe in the idea of falling in love with some and making great memories with them. Life simply wasn’t that way to him - 

All he cared about was sex and drugs, and his ex filled that exact cravings in him. He grew attached, but (Y/N) had taught him love. She taught him all the things that he didn’t know existed in him before.

“It’s true,” was all he said.

He grimaced as (Y/N) let out a shrill laugh, and stayed shut right after. He felt the need to caress her but decided against it, knowing that she will probably push him off.

“And I’m sorry. I was stupid, okay? I didn’t mean any of that. God, I wish I can turn back time and did everything differently because god, I was so fucking stupid and I hate seeing you cry because of me.”

Rafe could feel his own tears crashing down. The last time he had cried this hard was when Ward yelled at him, saying how useless he is and that he will never be proud of him, but (Y/N) was there for him during that time to calm him down. 

Now he’s alone.

“God, (Y/N), you give me love and you’ve taught me how to love and- and, I can’t let you go now, oh my god, I can’t-” he took a deep breath, “Not when I love you too much.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” she whispered, and Rafe felt like killing himself at the sound of her voice in pain. “Why didn’t you fucking tell me?” She repeated, louder this time.

“I was scared,” he whispered back. “I wish I can take your pain away.”

“Rafe-” she sat up, her eyes puffy and red from the never ending tears since she fled the party. She looked at the boy she loves, and felt a sudden wave of emotion for the thing she was about to say.

“Can we stop seeing each other for a while? Can we take a break?”

“What?” Rafe shook his head, his fingers trembling. “No. No. You are not hearing yourself. No.”

“Rafe, please,” she cried, gripping onto her bedsheet. “Give me time to think. I can’t think about all this, just let me breathe!”

“You can’t let me go, (Y/N),” he whispered, trying to connect their fingers like always. When he saw her slipping her hand into her covers, he let out a breath.

“It’s too cold for you to go home. You can sleep in here, with me.”

“Don’t do this to me,” he said again, getting closer. When she flinched, he used all of his energy not to let out a yell, knowing that it would cause her to leave him for good.

“Just give me time. To think. Okay?”

“I love you,” he whispered, “I’ll wait. However long it’s going to take, I’ll wait.”

She didn’t return his affection and Rafe waited a few more seconds for her to mutter the words back. He took a deep breath before standing up, limping towards her window again.

“Rafe, you can stay here. Don’t make this any harder for me.”

But he left anyway, and (Y/N) was frozen in her position as she stared at his previous space on her bed, his scent slowly evaporating into the air. She couldn’t believe it; she lost him. She lost every inch of him, the only boy she truly loves.

She cried again against her pillows, missing her boy.

#Part 3

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[randomshyperson]

hiii hope you’re doing well and drinking enough water!!! I’ve got an idea for high school nerdy wanda that I wanna share with you and you feel free to write it or not! so wanda is nerdy, shy and adorable and reader is popular and actually nice and has always been intrigued by wanda. I was listening to drivers license by olivia rodrigo when this idea came to me so, reader probably gives wanda a ride and it becomes their thing and reader is always saying wanda should get her driver’s license and they eventually get together and it’s all cute and fluffy but there’s this blonde girl (for the sake of the song lol) who’s obsessed with reader and always makes wanda nervous and jealous. so when said girl finds out about reader and wanda (let’s just consider this girl the typical most popular girl in school trope) she threatens reader and makes reader break up with wanda and get with her. you decide what the threat would be. maybe something really personal about reader or wanda’s past that would haunt them if people were to find out. but then reader and wanda get back together in the end of course. sorry it’s so long and again you don’t have to write this!!

Hi, honey, is everything alright? I hope so! I had to listen to Drivers Licence One Hour Version to write this, but I liked it haha This song is great for dramatizing a romance I never experienced, and I hope you'll be pleased! By the way, i kept the original drama of the singers (the whole guy was older and stuff)

Happy reading.

Drivers License - Wanda Maximoff x Reader

Warnings: 13+, Language, mentions of abuse/sexual harassment, bullying, underage kissing.

Words: 2.642K // Read on AO3 too 

You met Wanda Maximoff in your senior year of high school. 

It was raining heavily, and you had stayed late at school to take care of your responsibilities as leader of the athletic team. You figured that at that time there would only be you and the janitor in school, but as you were leaving towards the parking lot, you bumped into someone.

- Damn it, I'm sorry! - you said, looking at the person. It was a girl about your age, but you had never seen her before. She looked away from you immediately, as she bent down to pick up the books you dropped. - Hey, let me help you with that.

You bent down and helped her pick up the books, and when you stood up, you handed them to her with a smile.

- Thank you. - She spoke softly without looking at you. Maybe she was shy, you thought. 

And then you heard thunder and let out an exclamation, an idea occurring to you.

- Hey, are you driving? - you asked gently, and the girl frowned, but denied it with her head. - I can give you a ride, because of the rain.

- Oh, that's okay. No need. - She denied, blushing. You let out a little giggle when a louder thunderclap sounded.

- It's no bother, really. - You said, smiling. - Where do you live?

- On the Sokovia complex.

- Wow, you see? We are practically neighbors. - You reply cheerfully. - I live two streets away from your house.

The girl nods, looking away. You put your hand in your pocket.

- All right then. - She finally agrees, and you smile as you open the door to the parking lot, and walk out in front with her walking slightly behind.

You walk in silence to your car, but when you start the vehicle, you want to talk to her.

- So, what's your name? - you ask gently as you drive in reverse to leave the parking lot.

- Wanda. - She answers in a small voice looking out of the window. - Wanda Maximoff.

- I've never seen you before, Wanda. - You comment, and then you are outside, and the rain makes a loud noise against the car. 

- I'm a first-year. - She says and you let out a sigh of understanding. That' s why you didn't know her, she was a freshman. - But I know you.

You let out a surprised little laugh.

- Oh yeah?

- Everybody knows.

- Is it bad?

She shrugs, smiling slightly. You think you already like her. You then turn on the radio, letting some pop song play softly, and then you start tapping your fingers on the steering wheel to the rhythm of the song. 

- Since you are a first-year, you must not have a driver's license yet, right? - You comment, and Wanda denies it with a grumble.

- I'm only 15. - she says. You stop at a traffic light.

- Why were you in school until now? - you ask curiously.

- It's the best time to be in the library. - She answers, looking at you briefly. 

You are silent again, and then you arrive in the area of the Sokovia residences.

- Hey, Wanda. - You call out to her before she opens the door. - I can drive you to school if you want. - And seeing her surprised expression, you quickly add with amusement. - Just until you get your license.

Wanda smiles, and nods in agreement before leaving. 

It took 160 rides for you to realize that you were in love with Wanda Maximoff. And you thought it was not surprising at all.

From the first time you saw her, you thought she was impressive. And then every day of the week, you had a vision of her half-asleep leaving the house, and greeting you with a smile. You talked about everything, from the most superficial and random things, to your insecurities and fears. You shared your breakfast, and sang songs together. But then you'd get to school, and your friends would surround you, and Wanda would disappear. You only got her back on the way out, when you gave her a ride home.

You didn't say anything about it, and neither did Wanda. It was as if your car was the safe space in your relationship. And you were completely terrified of messing it up.

And then it rained again, but this time your car was in the outside parking lot. You ran to the car through the rain, and when you finally took cover you were soaked. You started laughing the next second, and when you looked at Wanda, you couldn't control yourself. 

- I want to kiss you. - You breathlessly confessed when you stopped laughing, Wanda blinked in surprise, her face red. - Is that all right?

It takes a moment, but she nods. Then you move on the seat toward her, and she meets you halfway. When your mouths meet, you both sigh. It's sweet and tender, and you part, leaving your foreheads together.

- Why did you stop? - She whispered with her eyes closed, making you gasp. And then you kissed her again, this time until the windows were fogged up.

Unfortunately things don't get amazing after that. The routine comes back to you, and then you are overwhelmed with end-of-year tasks. Even though you are completely in love with Wanda, and steal kisses between one ride and the next, you see the distance between you grow. Maybe it's the way you two act like you didn't know each other at school, or how Wanda won't tell you what your friend Sharon Carter was talking to her about the other day at school, or maybe it's the way you don't tell her that Tony Stark made fun of you for weird freshman.

And then things get much worse when you turn eighteen, because your friends start mocking you with the law on their side. And it's hard to concentrate on the good memories with Wanda while they tease and mock, and you want to go back to the car, but you have to smile and nod politely, because that's what they expect of you, and soon you're graduating.

You receive your acceptance letters from the universities, and you want to tell Wanda, but she is traveling with her family, and you are bored. And so you agree to celebrate with your friends who also got their letters, at some bar in town. When you start drinking, it's easy to dance and laugh all night, and when they tease you again, you want to leave, but there is a gentle touch on your shoulder. Sharon hugs you, and tells you that everything will be all right, that you should go out with someone who looks more like you, who is compatible, and when she says lots of sweet words, you want to remember smiles and stolen glances at school and gentle touches in your car, but your head is spinning and you accept her kissing you.

When you wake up, you are wearing no clothes, and there is a hand on your waist. You want to throw up, because even though you and Wanda never made a commitment, you feel the betrayal burning in your bones.

You want to yell at Sharon and tell her to leave, but then she's threatening you, with pictures you don't even remember taking. And when you get back to school, she tells everyone that you two are dating, and you wait for Wanda in the parking lot, but she doesn't show up.

You cry at your graduation, and not from happiness. And when the ceremony is over, you get in your car and drive one last time to Wanda's house, and you cry against the steering wheel. You are 18 now, with a diploma and a girlfriend. This is over, and you have to move on.

In college you meet someone who helps you, her name is Shuri, and after you have spent the whole first year being completely miserable, you have a literature assignment together. When you are going over the details of the presentation, at the third coffee meeting, you cry when you tell her about the photos.

- My girlfriend is blackmailing me. - You whisper, and she looks surprised for a moment, but then she hugs you, and assures you that she will help you.

There are police for a while, and then courts and court orders, and then therapy. You also make new friends now, good friends who don't judge or make fun of you. And then you pay attention in class again, and agree to join the track team. 

You try not to think that there is only one thing missing in your life, because you have no right to disappear and go back to her life, but you can't help it missing her.

But you swallow your feelings, and try to pay attention to the future.

You come home in the fall, and your past comes back to you. You don't think you've ever talked much to your brother about school, but then you find yourself asking. And as he talks, you ask about Wanda.

- Wow, I remember her. - He says. - That girl you used to drive around with, right? - he asks and you nod. - I never understood why Sharon was so mean to her, but I guess it all makes sense now.

You blink in confusion.

- What do you mean?

- I thought you knew that story. - He remarked nonchalantly while you were in the kitchen, he was looking for cookies. - She used to say such bad things to Wanda, as if she was superior to her, you know? I think she acted completely different around you.

Your heart is racing. Confused and angry.

- Why didn't anyone ever tell me this? - You complain and your brother frowns.

- Look, it wasn't anyone's problem. 

- It was my problem. - You retort. - I would have interfered, I liked Wanda!

Your brother is surprised by your outburst, but says no more. You drag your feet out of the kitchen.

You want to scream in anger, or punch Sharon in the face, but it's not mature and there's a court order. So you throw yourself on the bed, sinking your face into the pillow. When you fall asleep, you dream of Wanda.

On your last day at home, you know you shouldn't, but you drive to her house. You think your heart is going to burst out of your chest, but you swallow your nervousness and get out of the car. Wanda is on the porch, with her brother, and she looks surprised to see you. You assume that she didn't want to see you, but when she is close enough, she hugs you around the waist, putting her face into your chest. Your body instantly relaxes. You don't know if you're blushing from the hug, or from her brother's gaze on you, maybe a little of both, you think as you hug her back.

When you two are left alone on her veranda, you apologize for long minutes, because you're just sorry you lost her. But Wanda smiles, and holds your hand. And you are silent for a while, swinging your feet on the rocking chair. And then Wanda giggles.

- I got my driver's license. - She comments, and you let out a surprised and happy exclamation. 

- Let's drive somewhere now. - you say excitedly. Wanda laughs.

- Where?

- Anywhere. - You answer already getting up, pulling her by the hand.

While you are in the car, she tells you that she is going to a university in the south, forty minutes away from yours, and you can't hide your excitement. And then you are turning on the radio and singing along with Wanda loudly as she drives down a highway.

When she drops you off, you exchange numbers, and you know that this time you're not going to let her get away.

You are busy with college. Very busy. But this time, there are messages and video calls from Wanda almost every day. And then she's in college, and she's just as busy as you are. And you start missing her a lot, and your friends comment that you should tell her how you feel.

So you're driving to her dorm, but when you get out of the car, she's arriving, distracted with some books.

You hug her from behind, lifting her slightly in the air, she is startled at first, but as soon as she realizes it's you, she laughs. She turns around quickly, hugging you by the neck, the books are pressed against you, but you don't mind.

- What are you doing here? - she asks with a smile. You think she looks beautiful.

- I miss you. - You say, making her blush. - Can we go somewhere?

Wanda thinks for a moment, but smiles.

- Sure, I just need to leave some notes with my roommate. - She says. - You can visit my dorm.

You nod, escorting her into the dormitory. When you walk in you try not to get too excited. Everything is so organized, even for a college dorm.

Wanda's roommate is not here, so she just leaves her notes on the desk while you admire her polaroid collection.

- Where did you take this one? - you ask, pointing to a photo where Wanda was wearing a sailor costume.

She walked from the table to you, and let her chin rest on your shoulder. 

- At Sam Wilson's birthday party last year. - She answered, looking at the picture. 

- You look nice. - You commented, letting your gaze wander to the other pictures. Then Wanda's hands encircle your waist, in an embrace, and you bite the smile from your lips. - And this one?

You point to a photo where she is with Pietro.

- Halloween. - She answers after a moment. - I think we were on the street outside the house. - You murmur in agreement, looking at the photos, and then Wanda is moving her face. - You smell good.

- Thank you. - You comment, ignoring the fast beating of your heart. And then your gaze catches an interesting photo. - Ulala.

Wanda looks at the photo you are reaching for with your hand, and lets out a sigh, hiding her face behind your back as she laughs.

- Wanda Maximoff in a bikini, world. - You playfully try to look at her, but she just lets go of the hug, hiding her reddened face in her hands.

You raise your hands to her belly, tickling her until she pulls her hands away from her face. And while you're laughing, Wanda tries to push you away, but you hold onto her waist, and you both end up falling onto her bed. 

Your laughter slowly dies down, and you realize that Wanda is on top of you, your faces close together, and you swallow dry.

- I want to kiss you. - She confesses with reddened cheeks. - Is that okay?

You sigh and smile.

- Of course.

She smiles before bringing your lips together. It's as good as you remember, and then you're kissing until you're breathless, and Wanda sits on your lap at some point, and when your hands are on her waist and your fingers are through the fabric, you remember:

- I thought we were leaving. - You play out of breath.

- You're not going anywhere. - She replies with a smile and her lips swollen, before kissing you again.

Many dates happen after that, and two weeks later, you come back late from one of these, and you were planning something beautiful and impressive, but Wanda is smiling as she says goodbye and the words just slip out:

- Will you be my girlfriend?

Wanda blinks in surprise, taking her hand off the doorknob.  And then she smiles, and advances against you, kissing you on the mouth.

-Of course, you idiot. - She says against your lips, kissing you again.

And you are smiling, and kissing. And you don't want to let her out of the car, but you do, knowing that she would come back.