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horsedylan · 2 days ago

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Sue K- Background, Misconceptions and The Defense of.

Strap in folks, this will be a very long one. (i spent awhile on it lol, im tired)

Back in 2016 the consensus within the community towards Sue was positive. She was respected, and she gave people a gleam into what in sam hell was going on with her son, with her, etc. Then something happened. One, the great purge where a bunch of OG accounts got deleted and the shitposters (people like me :D) took over (literal defamation by shitpost), and a little while later a horrible video from the youtuber timmy2cents got published and went viral. It appeared well researched and produced but it was anything but. A good amount of hate for Sue came from this video, and I do believe played 100% a part of the narrative souring towards her.

I dislike timmy2cents with a fruity passion (he’s worth far less than that) . The absolute permanent damage he has done to the discussion surrounding a kind, and gentle grieving mother is deplorable.

He has somehow almost outdone Dave Cullen as far as mischaracterization goes, and subsequent damage.. And has had the same childish response to boot.

Before you read the rest of this: if you were one of the millions of poor unfortunate souls that consumed this timmy2cents video and take issue with Sue’s TedTalk. There are TWO must watch videos I encourage you to consume. You have been fed LIES. (That and it’s actually quite interesting to look at how tricky well produced propaganda can be to spot.)

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This entire thing has been sparked by so much outsider discourse where people parrot information directly from that timmy2cents video resulting in such insightful comments that insinuate she takes no accountability for what happened, and that she should “rot in hell” that she’s an “evil bitch”, that she used her son’s death for profit, that she excuses what he did (she doesn’t), that she’s a narcissist (be wary of anyone thats insistent on the narcissist label btw) etc. Repeating the same arguments from the timmy2cents video. He made the argument that this incredibly, permanently traumatized VICTIM of Columbine was a narcissist, and has now convinced millions of people of the same conclusion based on flimsy evidence. Also im not even going to address Todd Grande’s video on her regardless of his opinions whether they match mine (doubtful) or if he stays in his character. He’s not a good resource for psychology and he’s a known misogynist. If you watch him I encourage you to unsubscribe. He is way out of depth.

So anyway I wanted to make a post regarding Miss Sue and common misconceptions regarding her, or defences for problems people typically have with her.

Also feel free to copy and paste or otherwise steal and save any sort of info/argument post i have and repost it as your own (or link it to someone to shut them up.) I honestly don’t even care (especially if I get nuked) Fuck, any of my shit really. Take it, idc.

A Brief Background of Sue Klebold.

This information for Sue's background comes from Jeff Kass' book. I am not the biggest fan of the guy, his information is very good but in my books he is far too aggressive, rude (why'd you do Robyn dirty Jeff), and accusatory for my taste, so we shall semi respectfully/disrespectfully take this information and leave.

(Dylan's grandpa and grandma)

Leo Yassenoff, her grandfather (though not related by blood) was an activist for jewish rights/causes, and was an athlete. There is a Jewish Community Centre in Ohio named after him. Her father Milton Rice Yassenoff and his adopted brother Abner were adopted from The Jewish Infants Home in Columbus. Milton was born in Toledo, Ohio in 1919 and was of Russian descent. Leo passes away in 1971 of renal failure (two months after Tom and Sue marry), at the age of 88, he chooses to donate most of his 13-14 million dollar fortune to charity. Abner kills himself in the 1940's though a death certificate hasn't been located according to Kass.

Milton was an army man and served in World War 2. Once he came back he met his wife and Sue's mother Charlotte Haugh who grew up in small-town Ohio. This description of Sue's mother Charlotte is from Sue's eventual stepbrother Charles Huelsman the Third and is as follows; "Soft, diplomatic, a terribly nice person. Social, charitable, loving, concerned, empathic, real giving person, really tried to raise her kids well.”

Charolette would convert to Judaism, they belonged to the reform Temple Israel but are described as hardly attending. In total of biological children, Charolette and Milton would have three (in respective order); Diane Elizabeth, Susan Frances, and Philip Leo. Sue was 18 years old at the time of her father's passing of uremia. This sudden passing of her father at such a young age would pave for severe anxiety to come. Sue's mom would die of cardiac arrest in 1987 at 65.

Sue herself was born on March 25, 1949 and attended the private Columbus School for Girls from grades 1 through 12. Sue was involved in a number of extracurriculars throughout her time here. She was assistant art editor of the school paper, Silhouette, and art editor the next year. She was also art editor of TOPKNOT, the yearbook. She was involved in Scroll, the literary magazine that included art, stories, and poetry. She was in the art club, I’Pittori, along with the Latin club. She took photos for the school newspaper as well. An old classmate of Sue's mentions she and her sister Diane were quiet. Another described her as a private person.

She graduates from here the same year her father died in 1967. She then enrolled in Knox College but it didn't last, she left in 1969 to go back home to her mother. She sought counselling with pop psychologist (derogatory) Hugh Missildine, to deal with the intense anxiety her father's death had caused her.

Susan Yassenoff, shows up in his 1974 book co-authored with Lawrence Galton, Your Inner Conflict - How to Solve Them. Sue apparently appears under the pseudonym “Sandra,” This wasn't enough to stop the bloodhound Jeff Kass. Despite being under a pseudonym for a reason. He figures out who "Sandra" really is and makes a phone call. “I came across your profile in the Hugh Missildine book.” he says when Sue answers the phone. "What?” she said. “Yeah,” I reply, “in the, it was a few, quite a few years ago, the profile you had as Sandra.” “I think you are way out of base here, I’m going to hang up now,” Susan says.

Her lawyer, criminal defense attorney Gary Lozow, quickly called an intermediary. Lozow called it a matter that occurred when Susan Klebold was nineteen, however nothing ever comes of this as Sue seemingly leaves it alone after the fact.

Here is the copy paste of Sue's profile from the book:

Sandra is a twenty-year-old woman who came to see me because of a phobia. “I have a death phobia,” she told me. “It underlines everything I do. I think about death all the time.” She is a music student, about to graduate from college, has been living for the past year with her fiancé and is very much in love with him, as he is with her. He too is in music. When I asked her to talk about herself, she told me: “I’m afraid of failure. I won’t even attempt something unless I’m assured of success. I think too much. I don’t have a temper. “War things and medical programs bother me. I was terrified of bugs as a child. Airplanes used to bother me, too, and storms. My mother used to cuddle me and comfort me when I was fearful. When I was afraid, my sister would call me stupid. I scold myself for being afraid. I often feel that I’m a burden to people. I sometimes get depressed. “I think the fear of death will always be there. I wish I could turn off this part of my mind. I wish there were traumas to explain all this, but I’ve never had any traumas. When I get a headache, I’m always sure it is fatal. Then I worry that I will die, which makes the headache worse. Everything makes me think of death. I have to divert myself in the evening constantly—by eating, watching television, practicing my music or masturbating. I feel constantly that I’m coming a minute closer to death. What a waste of time to think of that all the time. But thinking this is a way of life with me.”

Questioned about her family, Sandra told me that her father had been a sensitive, sweet person who enjoyed doing things for her and whom she adored. He had died suddenly just before she had graduated from high school. Her mother?

“A saint—a real saint,” Sandra said. “She is kind, patient, never critical. When I was at home, my mother always enjoyed doing things for me and giving me things.” Here, then, is a young woman who came from a loving home, who is in love and is loved in return, who is bright, is intelligent, is attractive, has a deep interest in music and yet is an emotional cripple. Why should she suffer so much from, and devote so much of her attention to, an almost overpowering fear of death?

I'll spare you his pop psychology explanation for why she feels this way as anyone with half a brain can figure out why she is so terrified of death given the traumatic event she experienced a few years prior. I'll leave the important bits in though.

Sandra decided to do what her fiancé had long urged: get married. She became so busy with the wedding plans that, she told me in some surprise, she was thinking less and less about her fears. She still tends to slip back occasionally into old, indulgent, self-critical ways and to become a little fearful, but she can quickly abort the relapses.

Sue and Tom marry in 1971 on July 1st by a Rabbi. She graduates in 1972 with a masters in art education and a minor in psychology. They move to Milwaukee and she gets a job in the Milwaukee Psychiatric Hospital as an art therapy intern for adults. She then became a psychiatric art therapist at St. Michael Hospital. In 1975, she enrolls in Milwaukee’s Cardinal Stritch College for a master’s degree in reading. She works while in grad school, often in elementary schools. Her jobs included special education teacher’s aide and reading specialist. For about a year, she worked on a government program to help disadvantaged youths at the University of Wisconsin at Milwaukee. (Kass, pg. 40-49)

Misconceptions about/Defense of Sue Klebold (Warning, An Incredibly Compassionate Defense Ahead.)

This section is going to act as a sort of heavily opinionated FAQ. I don't know if it's the best way to do things but I think if anything it makes it more simple?

All of the following screenshots are from a mother's reckoning.

"She profited off D's death" Nope, wrong. She didn't, every single cent from her book was donated to suicide prevention charities. She didn't make money off of the Ted Talk either. And fuck it even if she did I wouldn't care. Her bonehead son made a fucking mess for her, she might as well get something from it other than trauma and heartbreak. But she didn't. So. (https://www.rmpbs.org/blogs/news/how-much-has-the-book-by-the-mother-of-a-columbine-killer-raised-for-charity)

"She bought him the trench coat" Okay Diane Sawyer, relax with your puritan ways. it was a coat not a glock. Next you'll criticize her for letting him play video games.

"D asked her for a gun for Christmas." She thought he was joking. According to Devon Adams, he had a dark sense of humour, and according to Sue he had a habit of asking her for ludicrous things when Christmas came around. She thought it was just another one of those things. She asked him why and he said target practice. It is not unreasonable. That family was known for being anti gun, their neighbours had them in the house and Sue refused to have them (despite the fact that it was deemed culturally acceptable to do so), so I'd probably interpret it as a ludicrous request from my son to get a rise out of me. Is it weird? Sure if you want to reach fine.

Also…Boys like guns? Like go into your local toy store, look at what you find. Those guns with the red parts that crack? Water guns? Nerf guns? Plenty of boys seriously ask for guns for Christmas too and get air soft instead even now in the current year, it was probably even more normalized in the 90's where they were fucking making pipe bombs on the regular. Seriously, I swear half of that school was cooking up pipe bombs its actually insane.

I'm just gonna point this out but plenty of boys under 18 (specifically 12-17) in Canada ask their parents to let them get their FAL because its not exactly the most shocking thing for them to be firearm trained.

"Why didn't Sue make D do therapy" Because what she thought she knew about D at the time was that he was a self sufficient guy who was striving to be independent as he approached adulthood, she trusted him, and D took advantage. The...mediator? That was in the room with them asked him how he felt about therapy, and he blatantly fucking lied and said "I'll prove to you I'm fine." Sue respected his input. A lot of you may make the complaint of "Oh well she should have made him do it" and while I do understand the sentiment I'm going to put it out there, being forced into therapy often makes it worse. We see that a lot in this community too.

Also E's family got him a therapist and guess what? It didn't do a damn thing to stop what happened. (I personally think the reaction to the van incident was a bit overblown in of itself. Teenage boys do dumb stuff constantly it doesn't mean they need therapy. Like, back in the day I broke into a church and completely fucking trashed the place with friends. I was so embarrassed and remain so even now, and yet I didn't need therapy nor did I go on to hurt people after being caught.)

A bit of a side note with E's therapy, You can have the best therapist in the world, if you aren't interested in the goal of getting better or in Dylan's case you are so prideful to reject all help (while simultaneously complaining about no one helping you i'll add) therapy won't do a damn thing. Neither will medication. Both therapy and Luvox are safe and beneficial (there are some detractors which is fine but this ain't about them) for individuals with a vested interest in self improvement, but Eric was disinterested in having a future being alive and was more preoccupied with his infamy. He liked the aesthetic of violence and the illusion of power being "crazy" gave him (like when he lied about being schizophrenic in his AOL bio) so he abused his medication to further that end instead of taking it how it was advised with the end goal of getting better. If anything I think Eric was honestly more likely to respond to a good and proper therapist before he became more interested in infamy and death than life, more so than Dylan, not because he was less prideful (he most certainly wasn't) but because he was far more external with his emotions than Dylan (Until Dylan blew his top that is). That's pretty helpful in a therapeutic environment.

So to say it wouldn't have helped if she did get D into therapy. I obviously can only give my opinion but if Eric didn't respond, I doubt someone so sensitive to embarrassment and internal like Dylan would fair any better. But again, this is just my own opinion. I think what D needed was another Zack Heckler. Not a therapist, but a friend who was emotionally intelligent. He found his emotional outlet in Eric once Zack became preoccupied with Devon, and both of them stoked each others rage and marinated in it together as some sort of bonding and coping ritual. I think Zack was the one keeping it in check.

Zack heckler had issues similar to Dylan. According to Sarah Slater he and Dylan would cry about these things on the phone together. Devon came into the picture and I think changed Zack for the better, I believe this convinced Dylan that his antidote for his depression was a soulmate. In a way he isn't wrong. Perhaps I'm an optimist but I do think having physical contact from a girl that loved him (not necessarily anything sexual) would have helped him immensely (eric too, no matter how much emphasis he put on just sex). Sue mentioned he was a sensitive, physically affectionate child after all. I don't think this fact ever changed.

"She blames E for the entire thing and makes D into the innocent victim" This one is a lot more complex but the short of it is ehhh..Maybe? No? Yes? Maybe? Sometimes? No. Yes..? The long of it is;

She was always going to be somewhat biased. This book is about her son after all. She knew her son. Carried him, loved him, etc. Her understanding of her son's culpability has been a journey through shit lake with no boat to speak of. A journey that she had to endure while she was heavily traumatized bear in mind. That is what A Mother's Reckoning is all about. She has come a long way in her understanding in 1999 to 2016 when the book was released.

She does not play pretend with Dylan’s involvement but rather has a more biased empathetic/sympathetic view of her own flesh and blood and his potential motives, nor does she excuse him for what he has done (no matter what your average redditor thinks of her and her tedtalk) but rather wishes to understand HOW he got to the place he did. I think it is closer to say she flipflops, she is lost, she doesn’t have an inkling as to what Eric’s motives were, the extent of any sort of pain he carried, his family life, and that she heavily mischaracterizes who he was as person and his motives, due to meddling "professionals" while accepting her son as a willing participant.

When it first happened she was in a state of traumatized denial. She was clinging to every bit of hope that her son wasn't some bloodthirsty killer. She describes the time she heard of these like…military mind control tapes that EH's parents had in their house, and in the throes of grief entertained that perhaps D was brainwashed by these tapes by EH.

On top of that, Judy Brown showed her E's website AFTER the shooting. AFTER, not before, AFTER. ( a lot of people shit on her saying she knew about it and did nothing but again, not true). This was also before she saw the BT's and also before D's journal got released to her in 2006 (I think it was 2006?) Then she saw the basement tapes and could no longer deny Dylan's culpability/cruelty in the act.

But what did she have to go off of at the time? The website, the time that Eric verbally abused Dylan for being bad at soccer, and Dylan just standing there and taking it.

Sue knew Eric + his parents sure, and had him around a few times, but did not know him very well. His parents did not come forward to humanize him to the public so she was just about in the dark as everyone else.

Then something else happened to add to the character assasination of Eric. In 2009 a book was published by "author" Dave Cullen called Columbine. He touted this book as the ultimate authority on Columbine, himself as an expert on the event that spent years researching it. So many places schools and universities alike use his book as gospel for studying the event. It characterized Eric as a womanizing psychopath who was intrinsically evil (paraphrasing). It hyper-fixates and waters Dylan down to a lost puppy wrapped up in Eric's scheme and charisma. Cullen was not the only person to characterize him as a psychopath either, so so many "professionals" and "experts" from psychologists to FBI agents, wanted their moment in the spotlight and came forward to say the same thing. When Sue went looking for answers and consultation for her book, she went to the experts and professionals, because that is simply what you do. This is some of what these "professionals" advised Sue about Eric and Dylan, not Sue, but the professionals;

(The above quote is from Andrew fucking Solomon, I do not assign him as much malice in his focus but he certainly had such an influence on Sue so much so that he spent time in their house.)

The biggest issue with Sue Klebold ultimately isn't Sue Klebold. Dave Cullen and the others mentioned before took advantage of and capitalized on a incredibly traumatized and grieving mother who wanted answers as to why her little boy who she dearly loved did what he did, Dave Cullen put himself in the front of the dialogue to further his name, authority and narrative. We don't know what he told her, but its almost a for sure thing that he advised her on all the "research" he did on Eric's person as it almost perfectly matches up to what is presented. There was no one else to accurately advise her on this matter. She could have turned to Kass for a basic idea (sort of), but again, but he was also limited due to the lack of parental interviews (apart from the one he got from Eric's dad where he followed him into a bathroom.), and he hadn't exactly been non aggressive with Sue. No, he burned that bridge. She wanted nothing to do with him and I do not blame her.

(fuck you Dave)

She did not come up with what she said earlier on her own to throw Eric under the bus.. If you have that many professionals telling you time and time again that he was a psychopath, you are going to take absorb it. If she ignored what the professionals told her at the time, she would once again be deemed a narcissist;

"Oh, you think you know better than handfuls of psychologists and experts? Wow Sue you're so narcissistic thinking you're smarter than everyone else." Yeah. Like Anne Marie Hocchalter's father states, she was in a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation, and the people who never went through what they did like to criticize her and pretend they are superior when they aren't. (https://zhawkeitsbeensaid.blogspot.com/2016/02/sue-klebold-what-were-you-thinking.html)

I even feel bad for the Harrises here as well because these same glory seeking professionals that convinced Sue Eric was the ringleading psychopath (sort of?ish?), also convinced them that the son they loved (and yes I'm sure despite Wayne's problems he still loved Eric) that their son was some psychopath who didn't share in that love. I think that is honestly fucking evil. Like as far as Dave Cullen goes, he didn't just write a book with fake information and a false narrative and advertised it as truth to the public, he also provided fake advice and information to a grieving mother and misrepresented it as truth. The absolute audacity man.

I think people forget that the families of school shooters have been severely traumatized, while they demand answers with a shocking amount of entitlement, resentment and hostility. And unlike the families of the shooters direct victims, they do not have the same supports they can rely on. and they are constantly being attacked by residents of the community, the media, etc. It takes years for them to heal to, on top of coming to an understanding of the why. People can get mad about Wayne not getting E from the lawyer after his cremation (and I do understand why they'd be pissed) but he was angry. *His boy killed people*, lied to him and his wife. But trauma guides our responses to things, it may not make sense for us who are privileged enough to not be in their position but its good practice to understand this simple fact.

(^These psychologists should follow the things they say more closely. The one thing I can agree with them on.)

If anything, I'd say if you take into account some of her interviews as well as her book it seems she, in her own mind, goes back and forth from neutral to biased. Its interesting but you can see a glimpse of her uncertainty regarding Eric here where she makes note of BOTH of their suicidality, though to what extent Eric was depressed and the coping mechanisms he had she doesn’t know to the fullest extent because again, she cannot humanize or understand Eric. (Also in some long since lost interviews I can no longer find she mentions how she cannot presume to know what exactly was wrong with him. I wish I could find them but its been awhile.)

She cannot champion Eric. She is not his mother nor his father. I’m sorry but if you’re the type to hate Sue for this (or any of the people involved here like Devon) you need to have a reality check. Ah yes. Endless compassion for the two boys that needlessly stole the lives of their classmates but absolutely fucking none for the innocents traumatized permanently for their deeds. 90% of the time its people partial to their romanticized version of Eric doing it too, and its just annoying lol (not people who like Eric, there is a difference.)

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"She didn't separate E and D" She did separate them initially, but Kathy H begged her not to do this. And why? Because she didn't want to isolate Eric. That's one of the worst things you can do for someone struggling is take away some form of social support.

Also, how do you separate two kids who go to the same school. Do you yank the one out in the middle of a school year and get them acquainted to a brand new school? Do you understand that that is one of the worst fucking things for child/teen development. That's part of the reason E was so fucked up in the first place.

"She didn't search his room" Yes she did, she stopped really doing it the further he got into senior year and stated that D was what, less than a month from graduating from high school and going to college, you have to let go of the reigns at some point (paraphrasing).

"She kicked Byron out"

No, watch Miorby's video. She didn't.

"She pushed him up against the fridge" So? Oh no a mother parents her son. It is completely normal for a parent to be hurt that her almost adult son forgot mother's day, on top of the van incident and being blatantly disrespectful she wanted to make a point that he was being a brute. She didn't body slam him lol. She put her hand on his stomach and held him there by the shoulder and gave him a lecture because he wasn't pulling his weight.

Despite me defending her here, she regrets not asking him what was up and wishes she knew what was up. But genuinely ask yourself, Dylan, who oh so loved lying to people, would he tell her the truth? She asked him multiple times before if he was okay and he LIED to her every fucking time.

"She downplayed Dylan's role in the van incident with her answers in that one form when describing what Dylan did to get arrested" No she didn't. I'm not gonna even explain this one to you, that claim is pure body/handwriting expert pseudoscience reaching. Watch Miorby's video's linked above if you care about this genuinely I'm not interested in "debating" you.

"How did she not know, the signs were there" Because she didn't. What warning signs do you speak of? D took painstaking effort to go out of his way to hide things from her and lie. There were no warning signs at the time because in order for something to be a warning sign, it has to be an acknowledged recognized sign to begin with, this wasn't such a thing in the 90's, I think its not a stretch to say a lot of the dialogue regarding mental health was coasting off the remains of the satanic panic. A lot of you are using the information of today to address an event that happened 26 years ago. Mental health care was not mainstream, it was not something parents addressed on the regular, if anything EH parents were closer to the norm than DK's. People cannot know what they don't. People will not know things that there is very little information on, if any at all.

Mental health and mental health care was barely existent, especially for men. Nope. No forget about it. Know the "my dad's gonna send me of to military school" gag? Or the old "Stop crying or i'll give you something to cry about" That was their therapy. I would really love to know how the conversation between E's parents and him went, regarding a therapist for E, I doubt Wayne handled it well.

This is ultimately why a society that makes this information incredibly accessible and integral to parenting is NECESSARY. Not fucking shoving it into the back of a closet and pretending it doesn't exist or making it some moral issue. And this is exactly what Sue is trying to do with the work she has done. People cannot know what they don't know, what has been shoved into a closet by a puritan Christian place like America/Littleton. That's the whole point of awareness campaigns. If you're still not convinced, go read what Anne Marie's father has to say about "warning signs".

You are placing an expectation of perfection onto a extremely traumatized human being. I am not saying she did not make errors, but you cannot live without making errors, and you cannot recognize them as mistakes as they are happening because that would be having hindsight 20/20 vision., It is literally impossible. She didn't hand him a gun, she tried to raise him with empathy. She was a better mother than my own.

"But she educated in Mental Health!" Sue Klebold was (sorry) barely a mental health professional. She was a therapeutic art teacher. Kass says art therapist but its more or less the same.. I'm not trying to be rude here, but that is basically meaningless when we are talking about being capable of recognizing warning signs. Like, I have actual background in psych as an industry, I've been getting education in it since I was in grade 10. (I took all my necessary psych courses but didn't want to waste money on a fucking French requirement) What I can tell you is that both her status as a therapeutic art teacher and her minor in psych is worthless as far as identifying warning signs in the 90's go. They are not responsible for diagnostics.

"She doesn't address gun control" You know this is actually really interesting. There were a few instances of mentioning gun control, one was a video interview breakfast conference with Sue back in 2018ish, a sort of blink and you'll miss. She mentioned that she does have an issue with how accessible guns were and are, but was terrified of the NRA. I do not blame her here and I think it speaks volumes of how terrifying those people are and the fucking blood on their hands (I'm not here to debate with gun nuts, i'm not anti gun so save it.)

"She says brain health" Omg…I get the joke but if you're serious. who the fuck cares? She's an old lady who grew up in a time where mental illness was seen as a severe negative moral failing and she doesn't want to inadvertently make it harder for people to seek out mental health treatment for fear of being seen as a crazy "mental case". This difficulty is what killed her son. Do I agree with her choice of terminology? No in fact I think its counterproductive (sorta).

BUT honestly, ya'll who say this seriously, sound like this lol

"She ignored Dylan when she heard him crying" No she didn't. this is a conflation of two events. I posted about this before, go look.

"How did she not notice his weight loss" She did, and she responded by offering him extra food between meals.

Dylan was a really tall guy, when you are a very tall teenage guy, you often look borderline anorexic no matter the amount you eat, and I recognize he lost weight but if I was bearing witness to it in real life I doubt i'd notice. I don't think it was as severe as people say too. They cite D's driver's license but that was certainly a guess on his part, he didn't weigh that much in 1997-98.

Your metabolism is fast, and you've got a lot of body that inherently makes you lose weight quick. Brooks Brown looked just as scrawny back then. Also eating disorders (I doubt he had one but regardless) were barely recognized for women back then, if anything it was encouraged (tuberculosis chic anyone lol) But for men? Forget it. It wasn't a thing. It's barely recognized as a problem now. If something isn't a thing or seen as a problem then chances are, you, a non researcher, won't know about it.

"But Randy Brown dislikes Sue's book and calls her book full of lies." Randy Brown dislikes Sues book and calls it a book of lies for a variety of reasons; none of them good. One is because Sue believes Dylan killed himself. Randy hates Eric Harris with a fruity passion and he thinks he murdered Dylan. He doesn't think there was mental illness present in either of them (obviously he's wrong lol). So does his creepy son Brooks Brown for that matter. Randy Brown as far as I'm concerned is a narcissist just like his son (Yes, I just told you to be wary of anyone who uses this label but know I do no use it because of sexism, but rather a long documented history involving himself in something that ultimately has nothing to do with him, if you want to criticize me for it fine.), who has placed himself in front of someone who was directly involved in this case and started speaking over her as an authority figure. He acts like he's some sort of expert on Dylan but no. Anytime you ask him for this secret bit of evidence he says he has, he refuses to provide it. He isn't an expert on Dylan.

(I understand these are 4 years old but he doesn't change his mind often)

Also Sue seems to have not regarded the relationship between Judy and herself as close as the Brown's like to portray. I think this reddit user summed it up better than I could

If Sue believed Randy's hypothesis about Eric people would still call her a narcissist too. Same thing with whole focusing on bullying as a cause that Randy has. She really is backed into a corner.

"She doesn't want the BT's to be released" This is another reason why Randy dislikes her. Let's do a little thought exercise shall we. When D did what he did the entire world pointed the finger at Sue. Half of the BT's were just the two boneheads thinking of every slur and going off, drooling on themselves and encouraging others to do the same.

Most professionals agree that it would inspire more shootings. Even in Canada we have a BSU (behavioral science unit) who advises against the release of this sort of material and had this happen similarly in 2019. Whether or not I agree or you do is irrelevant here (not that it matters, JeffCo releasing the cafeteria footage made this entire thing pointless anyway) If you are in her shoes, and the entire world blames you for the shooting, and professionals are telling you the release of these tapes would inspire others to take more lives in the name of your son, would you want them released? Probably not.

"She kept her hair appointment" So? Her son just went out and killed others and then himself. Would you want to be sitting at the breakfast table alone, looking at the place your son used to sit and its fucking empty? She was having panic attacks and was terrified of being alone. One of the worst things you can do when you've been traumatized like that is being alone, the presence of others is helpful. If you can't understand that…like…I can't help you here.

She was preoccupied with the junior photo thing Yeah I don't really have a defence for this but can only empathize and call others to do the same. I think she was an anxiety perfectionist. Given the outlined anxiety we went over above I don't think this is as surprising. She regrets it everyday. Again, this didn't drive D into doing what he did.

"What About the Laptop Stealing?" You know I'm not convinced Tom told her that happened. I have always gotten the impression that Tom gave Dylan this sense of accountability avoidance, imo the guy kind of comes off with an air of ego (I wonder if that's why D showed some distancing from his dad). Even when D got involved in that locker incident, he sends D out so he can deal with this for him? Weird. Also even if she did I think it is unreasonable for you to expect her to bring up every happening of D's life. A bit of kleptomania doesn't mean they're gonna kill someone.

"She didn't notice him SH" Dylan was such an interesting critter that he chose his hands to do it on. We don't know how often he did it but regardless of frequency I doubt anyone would notice. It's one of those "its so stupid its smart" deals. They had cats and bird, My brain would automatically assume it was cat scratches or a bird bite.

"She sometimes calls it Eric's plan"

We don't know who came up with it first, some mistakenly believe it was 100% Dylan as he started journalling first before Eric. But we don't know, it was probably at the same time, Either way. Silly yes, but 100% due to again the advisement of malicious professionals.

“She only does it for image” nah. The world pointed the finger and blamed her. It asked how this happened. She answered to the best of her ability and found healing in her work.

She wasn’t a public figure she could have stayed in the dark, private like the Harrises but she didn’t. Her image is constantly being called a narcissist every 5 seconds despite being a wonderful person. She’s in a unique position and decided to become a force for good.

“Oh well who cares we’re tcc so we can be immoral its stupid to care about morality so ill shit on victims if i want” A lot of people in this community are genuinely wonderful people. You aren’t inherently immoral for being here. If you want to use your presence here as a crutch and an excuse for you to continue to be a shitty fucking person that's your business. Your insistence of a lack of morality is still an insistence of a certain kind of morality, you just don’t like the one where you get judged as an a hole. Get over yourself.

"She said to that one person she has nothing to apologize for after they said i forgive you" as far as the shooting goes, she doesn't. Her son is not her.

"Why do so many people call the mothers of perpetrators narcissists?" Watch this from 1:29:00-1:60:00 ish. It also has some interesting bits about Ed Gein and the problem with the normie true crime types (not us).

youtube

Conclusion 1/Normie Public Reaction/TedTalk (sort of)

They complain that she makes Dylan sympathetic. What is the alternative? They demonize him into a monster that is so beyond human that people can continue writing off the human warning signs that make up a mass shooter? We complain so often here that people demonize far too often. And I agree so I’m grateful that she has spent so much time trying to counteract the “Demon” narrative (even with Eric, she speaks in a pathological manner, rather than some monster sense.)

Dylan was person who was clearly dearly loved, he lived his short life as a very sensitive suicidal person who turned apathetic and homicidal. If he doesn’t care about his own life its not exactly shocking he doesn’t care about hurting strangers (I do genuinely think they mentally blocked out any image of hurting their friends and tried not to dwell on it.)

I think its well within her right to emphasize that he was a person. He was a person that was loved, that loved others.

The world pointed the finger at the parents, and criticized them further and implied their guilt when they were met with silence by them. The biggest question people had was “How did YOU not know”.

So she responded on how, on what she missed so parents don’t make the same mistake. She emphasizes she was not abusive nor was her husband. She has every right to do this as everyone accused her of being abusive. She has every right to defend herself.

Sue Klebold is every high horse “i’m better than you” parent or person’s worst nightmare. She tells you that your perfect teenagers can be depressed, she tells you of the normalized signs of teenage depression that drove her son to kill others and then himself.

She tells you of his human traits; how loving he was as a little boy, peering into her eyes to see if she was healing after a nasty eye infection and crafting her an imperfect Get Well i love you Pegasus as a present to make her feel well, how smart he was counting pinto beans on the floor at 3.

She shows you that it is a human being that commits these acts, not some inhuman demon that is the offspring of a demon. The insistence of anything other then that is copeium. It is a self soothing tactic of “this can’t happen to me, i’m such a great parent”

And she shows her profound love for him, even now. Emphasizing his humanity in a sea of people saying he was a soulless deranged monster.

Despite what he did she collected him like a precious treasure, accompanying him to his cremation despite clearly not wanting him to be cremated (fuck people who desecrate graves by the way) making sure he got a funeral, then spending the rest of her life trying to understand why he did what he did. Throwing herself into a callous, vicious public eye to try to make it up to her son despite him being dead for over a decade when she first came out publicly.

She isn’t a narcissist, she isn’t evil. She isn’t a b*tch. She is a lovely human being who has been through severe trauma. She loved Dylan. Dylan loved her. I know she doubts that. But he clearly did, even when he was about to “leave” he tried to offer her a comfort in the last tape (no matter how churlish it was) telling her he was going to a better place.

I find it unfortunate that Eric's parents couldn't do the same for him so all we have about him are what the careless professionals have to say about him.

Conclusion 2

If anything, this is a lesson in why society must be aware of psychological problems and the variety of ways they manifest and who they can manifest in. A society that makes this information incredibly accessible and integral to parenting is NECESSARY. Not fucking shoving it into the back of a closet and pretending it doesn't exist or making it some moral issue. It is also a lesson in the danger of a culture that is based on domination and hierarchy instead of one that embraces empathy and compassion, both in the extended real world but also in an academic setting (a school culture that treats its athletes with reverence for instance). Bullying had its place in cause but I don't think it's the #1 factor, not by a long shot. I guarantee Isiah Shoels had it worse than those two. Kyle Velasquez too. A bunch of others who had it worse. They didn't do anything to hurt anyone, they didn't plan a shooting. Neither did the 2000 others in that school. Sure they thought of it from time to time, but at the end of the day they didn't, and E+D did. I believe there is something that exists as a fragile foundation that primes certain people for violence. And if you add bullying onto it and ease of access to firearms and normalizing the making of bombs and a friendship with this sort of mutuality, it knocks everything over like a deck of cards. D+E had severe pride issues, and entitlement issues by the end of their lives (as an example, Harris blaming the shooting on the women who turned him down, as if he was entitled to them?), I think most of it stemming from their young age they had an inherent ego centrism to both of them that they probably would have grown out of had they lived to see 25. Like part of the reason D and E were so mad is not just because they were bullied, its because they were at the bottom of the hierarchy which is why they went after freshmen once they aged out of that demographic D even says he wanted what the jocks have (while saying he doesn't lol). E too though indirectly. Both boys prioritized an aesthetic of violence and revenge. I do think this is part of the reason why boys/men are more prone into doing this sort of thing, and being external and blamey about their problems too (not that women are incapable of violence, but the rates of Men vs women aren't even close and they are far more external.). Violence is apart of their socialization blueprint/archetype which is why so many of them are obsessed with media displays of violence that is rewarded with power. Bullying demasculinizes them. Damaged masculinity "redeems" itself through violence. It is the ultimate "Now you see me". D+E went from bottom of the barrel to…I don't want to call them icons. But they certainly solidified themselves into history as we're still talking about them 26 years later.

Anyway, I don't know, I guess I just get a kick out of people who have endless amounts of compassion for two murderers, but absolutely none for the family that loved them very dearly. If you're one of the people gleefully slobbering over yourself about how much you hate Sue and how you can't wait until she dies (yes, I have seen this way too many times here) that's fine, have your weird tantrum. You are just another one of those people that hates on victims, and you're certainly not morally justified.

It feels hippy dippy to say, but I find myself wanting their to be some sort of kind merciful god out there that grants all of us inner peace and reunification, so so badly. I don't believe in any sort of afterlife, but I pray Sue's passing is a gentle one, and I hope she gets to see Dylan again, I really do. For both of their sake.

youtube

#horsedylan #tcc columbine #dylan columbine #eric columbine #columbine 1999 #columbine school shooting #tcc tumblr #tcctwt #tccblr #tc community #tcc fandom #dylan 1999 #eric and dylan #eric 1999 #true cringe community #teeceecee #Youtube

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bakawomans · 3 days ago

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And I'm finally here with a lot of translated facts about Helga ( wow, there are 16 facts ) and along with her Dorms Room design ^w^ Please enjoy reading and feel free to ask questions <3

Despite the fact that her age is listed as 18 in the documents, Helga is actually 211 years old. This is due to the influence of her special magic on her. (And she still remains human, with her own quirky traits, which confuses many representatives of magical races.) In the Diasomnia, everyone (except Lilia) completely missed this information; almost all the students, even her classmates, are absolutely unaware of this nuance in her biography.

The Night Raven College sent her an invitation several times, and each time Helga couldn't understand what was going on and why she was receiving an invitation to Night Raven College. Eventually, she reached the stage of "fine, you convinced me, I'll go and laugh at their system's screw-up," and yes, she stayed in college to continue joking about the situation. No one was able to explain to her why this happened.

Helga does not use sarcasm and irony - she speaks in them, and even she is not always able to understand whether she just made a joke or not. Naive freshmen are slightly intimidated by this.

For the reasons mentioned above, Helga wears a uniform with male side of fastenings because, in her opinion, "well, this school thinks I will fit in here, and who am I to argue?". Yes, she finds it amusing, she enjoys it, and she gets a lot of "hee-hee" from the whole situation.

Unlike many, she did not avoid Malleus but consciously thought about meeting him to ask a couple of questions about the complex magic related to her family. A little later, she asked him if she needed to pretend to be afraid of him, as she got the impression that she was not in some local trend.

She hardly feels fear about anything, as she lost all her particularly close people long ago, became enlightened, and life became extremely clear to her (well, it seemed that way to her), and to scare her, one would really have to try hard, and even then, it’s not a fact that it would help.

She does not give up trying to teach Malleus how to use social media. She considers Vil the best head of the dormitories among all the current ones. She is quite good at alchemy and preparing various substances.

On the door of her dorm room in Pomefiore, there is a curse placed by Vil. After her enrollment, Vil himself offered to place a curse on her door. Helga believed there was no great need for this, as she was quite capable of taking care of herself and deterring unwanted guests if necessary; however, she accepted the help with friendliness and gratitude. Later, Vil became one of her few close friends in college, a role he maintained for many years after graduation.

Helga claims that she does not particularly enjoy the company of those of royal blood. When Lilia asked her if Malleus was an exception in this case, Helga replied that she does not perceive Malleus as a "realistic" representative of the ruling dynasty (meaning the absence of tantrums, whims, etc., as she has had close experience). Soon, Lilia changed the subject with a mysterious smirk but asked her to definitely message him in the chat if Helga decided to voice this thought to Malleus.

Helga really dislikes braiding her long hair and especially hates unsolicited advice about how it would suit her better that way. She claims that her dislike for braids began in early childhood. "Have you ever thought about the fact that hair does not possess consciousness and cannot understand how to unravel itself from a braid or a complicated hairstyle into its natural state?" Given that her hair is indestructible, poor Helga has to untangle all those knots by herself every time, as she couldn't even get angry enough to cut a lock or a tangle. Since then, she rarely wears braids or does not use the strands of hair involved in braids when casting her special magic.

Helga collects earrings; however, she does not particularly like earrings with a bunch of small gemstones due to the often used settings in such jewelry that easily catch hair. Considering the traditions of jewelry gifts, giving her something she would like is quite a quest. She will wear almost anything that at least matches her aesthetic taste, but to truly love…

Helga's hair feels warm to the touch due to the energy of the sun from the golden lily. However, at certain intervals, she needs to spend a long time in the sun to "charge her hair with energy" (as the golden lily, even after its rebirth, is still essentially a flower).

Helga's primary emotion most of the time is calm, but it can easily transform into a sarcastic 'I don't care about whatever in the world' meme. It is difficult to get her out of this state, and at some point, people start to catch themselves thinking that they are curious to see other expressions on her face.

In college, Helga joins the equestrian club, and she generally handles horses quite well (she also doesn't understand the concept of a lady's saddle, despite the reasons for its creation and everything else. As soon as the discussion about horse equipment starts, she will definitely comment on how, thank goodness, that ugly contraption has gone out of fashion).

It sounds quite funny, but before enrolling in the Night Raven College, Helga already had her own small job (something like a sole proprietorship), as everyone needs to make a living. To say "by profession" would be too grand, but in fact, Helga is a relatively well-known lace maker in narrow circles, having become a very skilled artisan over the years. Even after entering college, she continued to quietly fulfill orders in her free time, as, unlike the kids with parents, money didn't just fall into her pocket, unfortunately.

In Helga's life, there were three people she could call her mothers to some extent (she learned about the existence of the third one much later). Despite spending a completely different amount of time with each of them, she is grateful to all of them for the help they provided her as she grew up (although in one case, there turned out to be much more bitterness than positive emotions). Her attitude towards them changed throughout her own growth, and eventually, she was able to look at the situation from different angles, having cooled down and accepted everything that happened to her as an unchangeable fact. History does not tolerate the subjunctive mood.

#disney twisted wonderland #oc #twisted oc #art #twst oc #fanart #twisted wonderland #malleus x oc #twisted wonderland malleus #disney twst #pomefiore

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airborneice · 3 days ago

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soo throwing out my pmd au designs for the trio, and also their levels and movesets bc I put way too much thought into this already and I’m gonna yap about all of it under the cut :>

so for why I chose the pokemon I did…David and Hilda’s pokemon were really quick to figure out for me - teddiursa is already orange and literally the son boy pokemon so it was a perfect match imo, and shinx picks up 3/4 of Hilda’s colour palette without even trying. plus the electric type has a reputation for being a bit feisty and impulsive so that fits Hilda p well I think

Frida gave me way more trouble finding a suitable match but I think I’m finally happy w making her an espeon. I think her being a psychic type is a good analogue for magic so it ticks that box, and espeon picks up the purple in frida’s s3 design (her white patches are also meant to relate to her s3 look :> ). alsoo it’s not super obvious here but her inner ears and gem are blue so she can still match both hilda and david’s colour palettes like god intended 😌 OH and also a bit of Frida’s clothing/decor in the show is cat-themed, so I figured if she likes cats so much she can be one. as a treat 😌

so in this AU Hilda takes the place of the player character, so she’s the one randomly waking up in the pokemon world with amnesia and the vague recollection of being human before whereas David and Frida are just regular pokemon (something something parallel to Hilda moving to the city and having no idea how anything works vs David and Frida already having it figured out etc)

at the start, Frida is already evolved and a bit higher level than the others. I was thinking of that drive to overachieve & live up to expectations that she has at the start of the show, and how in a pokemon au evolving a little early would probably be a point of pride for her (and her parents). david and hilda on the other hand don’t have much expertise battling yet (Hilda is literally fresh into being a pokemon so doesn’t have battles figured out and David is actively scared of them) so they’re low-level and their movesets are basic, though I tried to tailor them to their personalities a little bit. I wanted to make Frida’s moveset more tactical and thought-out since she’s the one planning and strategising to keep the team on track. (a moment of silence for her hanging on to Baton Pass when she’s in a team with two pokemon who are too scared/inexperienced in battle to be any help at all…) plus she has the odd TM bc I figure if her parents had such high hopes for her, they’d try to make sure she had a good start and got the best moves money could buy. at the point where Hilda comes in, Frida and David both want to become explorers but for their own reasons can’t quite work up the nerve to make it happen yet..we’ll get to that in the next post :>

#i think we can all see who the target audience for this au is #me. It’s just me #i love having an excuse to be insane abt pokemon on main #i uh. have not drawn a lot lately #all my energy rn is going into surviving at my new job lmao #so I’ve been taking a break from drawing and it’s been kinda nice!#i wanted to post what I already had tho and I’ll keep chipping away at it #it might be a while tho #Hilda netflix #pokemon #hilda the series #pokemon mystery dungeon #pmd #pokemon au #art tag

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sparkleyun · 1 day ago

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7 minutes in heaven

pairing: jake x fem!reader genre: fluff, highschool au synopsis: After weeks of burying yourself in textbooks, your best friend has had enough. She insists you take a break and drags you to a party thrown by her and a few of her other friends. You’re skeptical at first, since parties aren’t really your thing, but you find yourself actually enjoying the night. That is, until he walks in. The guy who’s made your life miserable all year. The one who never misses a chance to tease you. wc: 2.4k warnings: Jake teases reader for being uptight and a "nerd", alcohol, Jake redemption arc basically

"Come on, you can’t seriously be saying no again."

Your best friend is sprawled across your bed, her head hanging off the edge as she stares at you with an exaggerated pout. You don’t look up from your notes, but you can feel the weight of her gaze.

"I have a chemistry exam next week." you reply, flipping a page in your textbook for dramatic effect.

She groans, dramatically rolling onto her stomach and burying her face in your pillow.

"You always have a chemistry exam, or an essay, or some other reason to close yourself off and forget what fun is."

You frown but don’t respond. However, she doesn't stop there. She props herself up on her elbows, eyes narrowing.

"You know what your problem is?"

"Oh, I’m sure you’re about to tell me." You mutter, playing with your pen as you agonizingly await her answer.

"You don’t do anything," she declares, flinging her arms out like this is some major revelation. "You just study and go to school, and come home and study more. When’s the last time you had an actual conversation with someone who wasn’t a teacher or me?"

You open your mouth, then pause. You were unable to answer her question, which unfortunetly meant she was right.

"Exactly. Which is why you’re coming to this party tonight." she says with a proud grin plastered across her face.

You scoff. "Yeah, no. Not happening."

"Yes, happening." She rolls onto her side, supporting her head up with her hand. "It’s just a party, not a death sentence. You go, you loosen up, maybe even talk to a cute guy"

You shoot her a glare.

"Fine, fine." She waves you off. "But at least let yourself have fun. You deserve a break."

You hesitate. You really don’t want to go, but she knows you too well. She’s persistent, you're compliant, and she always gets her way eventually.

She starts listing all the things she’ll do in exchange: buying you coffee for a week, finishing your half of a group project, doing your laundry, etc. Exhausted by her antics, you finally cave.

"One hour," you say, closing your textbook with a sigh. "And if it sucks, I’m leaving."

She grins like she’s just won the lottery. "Deal."

───

The party is already in full swing by the time you arrive. The house is packed with people, and the music is playing so loudly that you can feel the bass vibrating in your chest. They are everywhere, spilling out onto the front lawn and swaying to the beat of whatever playlist is blasting through the speakers inside.

You hesitate at the entrance. This isn’t your usual scene. Crowds, noise, chaos- it’s the opposite of the structured, predictable and quiet world you are used to.

"Stop overthinking it," says your friend, linking her arm through yours. "I swear, you’re gonna have fun."

You let her pull you inside, where the air reeks of alcohol. The energy is infectious though, and despite being outside of your comfort zone, you start to loosen up.

After a few introductions (most of which you forgot immediately), you manage to carve out a comfortable spot in the kitchen, leaning against the counter with a soda can in your hand. Surprisingly, you’re enjoying yourself more than you expected. You’re still not a party person, but it’s nice to let go for a while, to watch the chaos from a safe distance and not worry about exams or deadlines.

Then, just as you start thinking this might not be so bad, your stomach drops.

Jake is standing near the pool table, laughing with his group of friends.

Your body freezes and your heart begins to race. No, no, no. This isn’t happening. Out of all the people in the world, why does he have to be here?

He hasn’t seen you yet, but that doesn’t stop the familiar wave of irritation and, if you’re being honest, a little bit of panic, from crashing over you the moment you realized he was there. Jake, your personal pesterer, the guy who has spent the entire year making you miserable. He’s always got a sharp comment ready, always looking for ways to get under your skin. And now, somehow, he’s here, in the same space, at the same party as you.

Your first instinct is to disappear. Maybe you can blend into the crowd, maybe-

Too late.

His eyes land on you.

You watch in real time as he recognizes your face, followed by something else. A quick curl of his lips into that infuriatingly familiar smirk.

"Well, well," he drawls, abandoning his friends and making his way towards you. "Didn’t expect to see you here."

Your grip tightens around your drink.

"Didn’t expect to be here." you mutter, shifting your weight as he stops in front of you. He looks effortlessly relaxed, dressed in a way that makes it clear he belongs here, like he was made for this kind of scene. Meanwhile, you feel like an imposter.

He tilts his head, his smirk deepening. "So, what happened? Library closed down?"

You roll your eyes. "Wow, you must’ve been saving that one all year."

He chuckles, clearly amused by your growing impatience. "I gotta admit, I’m kind of impressed. Didn’t even think you knew what a party was."

You glare at him, but before you can snap back, your friend suddenly appears at your side, looking between the two of you with an arched brow. "Everything okay?"

Jake doesn’t even glance at her. His focus is still on you, eyes fixated on your nervous figure, despite your attempts to retort.

"Oh, we’re just catching up," he says smoothly.

"Yeah, more like trying to ruin my night" you mutter under your breath.

He grins. "Now, now. I didn't do anything besides try to have a pleasant conversation."

"Are you kidding me?" you muttered under your breath.

Without thinking, you grabbed your best friend by the wrist and pulled her towards a quieter corner of the room.

"Whoa, what was that about?" she yelped.

"Why is he here?" you hissed, jerking your head in Jake’s direction.

She blinked, following your gaze. "Who?"

"Who do you think?"

When she spotted him, a look of realization crossed her face.

"Ohhh, him? Yeah, I invited him."

You gaped at her. "Are you actually insane?"

"Relax," she said, waving a hand. "He’s friends with a bunch of people here. I didn’t think it’d be a big deal."

"Not a big deal?" You stared at her in disbelief. "He makes my life miserable, and you invited him?"

She rolled her eyes. "Oh, come on, y/n. He teases you, yeah, but it’s harmless. He’s actually kinda fun if you get to know him."

"I don’t want to get to know him."

"Well, too late," she said, nudging you playfully. "You’re at the same party. Might as well make the best of it."

You exhaled sharply, resisting the urge to throttle her.

Just then, as if the universe was conspiring against you, Jake glanced back in your direction. The second your eyes met, his lips curled into that infuriating smirk once again.

"So" he drawled, making his way toward you. "You didn’t think I’d see you here, huh?"

Your grip tightened on your best friend’s arm.

"Look, can you just let me have this?" The frustration in your voice clearly displayed. "I don’t want to deal with you tonight."

He raises an eyebrow, lips curling into that all too familiar smirk. "Wow, I didn’t know you were so desperate for a night off from me. I must really be living rent free in that head of yours."

You shoot him a sharp glare, but to your surprise, he just chuckles, raising his hands in a mocking surrender. "Alright, alright. I’ll let you sulk in peace for now."

With one last glance, he turns around, meeting his friends and disappearing into the crowd, leaving you exhaling in relief, but your body still tense.

───

You’ve been at the party for over an hour now, and to your own shock, you’re not hating it, even after the small encounter. Your best friend was right. Getting out of the house for once wasn’t the worst decision. You even found yourself relaxing a little, laughing at jokes, sipping your soda, and, of course, avoiding Jake as much as possible.

Unfortunately, your luck runs out when someone shouts over the music.

"We’re playing seven minutes in heaven! Everyone get in a circle!"

Your stomach twists. No, absolutely not. No way.

You immediately shake your head and turn to your friend. "Nope. Not happening."

"Oh, come on," she groans. "It’s just a game!"

"Yeah, a game where people get shoved into a closet together for seven minutes," you point out."That sounds like my personal hell."

She rolls her eyes. "You don’t even have to do anything. Half of the time people just talk. It’s just for fun."

You’re still not convinced. You’re about to make a run for it when a hand suddenly lands on your shoulder, stopping you in your tracks.

"Oh, you’re definetly playing"

You already know who it is before you even turn around. Jake stands behind you, looking infuriatingly amused.

"I am not playing," you insist.

"She is!" your friend calls, betraying you in an instant.

Before you can argue, someone grabs your wrist and drags you toward the circle. You shoot a desperate glare at your best friend, who only grins and mouths "you’ll thank me later".

Doubt it.

With a pained sigh, you lower yourself onto the floor. The circle is filled with laughter and excitement. Most people are already whispering about who they hope to get. Meanwhile, you sit stiffly, arms crossed, willing yourself to become invisible.

"Alright," someone announces, shaking a hat filled with slips of paper. "Ladies first!"

One by one, people take turns drawing a name and disappearing into a nearby closet. You silently hope the game will be over before it gets to you, but of course, life isn’t kind like that.

Eventually, the hat is passed to you.

You hesitate. You knew that if you refused now, you’ll just draw more attention to yourself. Sighing, you reach inside and pull out a folded slip of paper. For a brief, hopeful moment, you pray it’s someone harmless.

Then, you unfold it, and your stomach drops.

Jake Sim

Your breath hitches as you stare at the name, hoping it would magically change. Maybe if you blink enough times, you’ll see someone else’s name instead.

No such luck.

"Who’d you get?" someone asks eagerly.

You open your mouth to lie, to make up a name, but before you can, he leans forward, plucking the paper right out of your hands. His laughter is immediate.

"Well, this is going to be interesting."

You glare at him, heart pounding. "I’ll pick again."

"That’s not how it works." someone protests.

"C’mon, rules are rules." Jake chimes in.

You clench your jaw. He’s still looking at you, waiting, enjoying this far too much.

"Fine." you snap. "Let’s get this over with."

Someone cheers as you push yourself up, and before you know it, you’re being ushered towards a small coat closet. He follows you at a relaxed pace, as if this is all just another way for him to mess with you.

The second the door closes behind you, you cross your arms tightly over your chest and sit down on the floor, determined to count down the minutes in silence.

For a while, that’s exactly what happens. Neither of you speak. The only sounds are the muffled bass of the party outside and the occasional distant noise of people speaking.

Then, predictably, he breaks the silence.

"You’re taking this way too seriously."

You don’t respond.

"What? Are you afraid of being alone with me?" he teases.

"No." you mutter.

"You sure? Because you’re standing all the way over there like I’m contagious."

You scowl. "Maybe you are."

He chuckles, amused. "Damn."

Silence again.

Then, softer this time, he speaks as he bends down to sit at your level "You really don’t like me, huh?"

You look away, your throat tightening. "What gave it away?" you say in a sarcastic tone

He sighs. "Look, I know I mess with you a lot. But it’s not that serious."

Suddenly, something in you snaps.

"Not that serious?" you echo, your voice rising. "You humiliate me every chance you get. You make fun of me in front of everyone. You act like I’m some kind of joke- like I’m beneath you. So yeah, it kind of is that serious."

The words spill out before you can stop them. Your voice is thick, emotions bubbling to the surface all at once. You didn’t realize how much had built up until now.

He doesn’t respond right away, but when he finally does, his voice is quieter than you’ve ever heard it.

"I didn’t think it actually bothered you."

You scoff. "Of course it bothers me."

There’s a pause. Then, unexpectedly, he says, "I’m sorry."

You blink in disbelief. "What?"

He exhales. "I mean it. I didn’t think- I just thought it was fun, you know? I didn’t realize I was actually hurting you."

You look at him, really look at him, and before you can process it, there’s a shift in the air. The small space between you two seems to shrink, his apology hanging heavy in the air, dense with unspoken feelings. Your pulse suddenly quickens.

Then, he reaches out.

Your body freezes as his fingers brush against your wrist, the touch barely there. You should pull away, you should, but for some reason, you don’t.

"I didn’t mean to make you feel like that," he murmurs. "I swear."

Your throat tightens. "Then why do it?"

His fingers curl slightly around your wrist, hesitant. His voice is almost too quiet to hear.

"Because it was the only way I knew how to get your attention."

Your heart stops. The space between the two of you shrinks, and something shifts in your chest.

Before you can process it, the door suddenly swings open.

"Time’s up!"

Light floods the tiny space, and you both flinch. Laughter erupts from the crowd outside, but you’re too disoriented to play along.

You step out first, heartbeat hammering in your ears. Jake follows closely behind, his expression unreadable.

"Well?" Your friend asks eagerly. "What happened?"

You open your mouth, but nothing comes out.

You’re still reeling, still processing the fact that everything between you and Jake abruptly changed.

Because he apologized.

Because he meant it.

Because for the first time ever, you don't hate him at all.

a/n: this is my first ever fanfic so I hope it's good ( ◜ᗢ◝ ) if this post does well I might post a part 2!!

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breathinginsulfur · 2 days ago

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Hey guys, i know this rant is long enough but i wanna add some more.

Really trying to understand why stolas is genuinely despised, and it’s hard for me to understand. But I think i have something, and it may potentially be a hot take but these days even liking the show is a hot take /hj

I think (SOME) people, not all, just genuinely have a hard time believing that men can be victims of abuse. Especially if the abuser is a woman. Because yes, it is true that most domestic abusers are men, and men are more capable of getting away with abuse, but you cannot act like this is the only way it happens.

Stolas is an abuse victim. His father was emotionally unavailable and barely even remembered anything about Stolas. To Paimon, Stolas is just another one of his spawn. Nothing more.

While we are still lacking on Stella’s background (which we desperately need), what we know is that she never loved Stolas, the same way Stolas never loved her. they were never in love. They had one reason for their (forced) marriage. To birth a new heir. That’s it.

We can assume that they never got along. Judging by their personalities, Stolas is not an assertive person. He’s nervous, but intelligent, and passionate about his powers and interests. He did not at all try to overpower or dominate blitzo as a kid, despite being royalty. We saw him bow down to blitzo, to which Paimon got angry at. Stolas does not look down on people, he looks down on himself.

Based on the photo of Stella Paimon showed to Stolas, she seemed to be a more aggressive child, making it likely that she was also not parented properly. By this we can also assume that she took the more dominant role, taking advantage of Stolas’s anxiousness and taking control in relationship.

In photos she took with Via and Stolas, she looks like she doesn’t want to be there. She doesn’t appear to have any true care for Via. In Loo Loo Land, when Via calls for both of them, Stella refuses to acknowledge her, grumpily telling Stolas to deal with it. Again, i really, really hope they give us more background about her, because it will most likely make it so much easier for people to understand why Stolas is not the bad guy. One of my biggest issues with this show is the lack of background for the women in the show. But i trust that we will get it soon.

I believe Stella only truly cares for the title of being a Goetia. She doesn’t care about her daughter or her now ex-husband, she only wants the richness and glory of being a goetic demon. THIS is why she did not divorce Stolas. When she found out he cheated, did she appear personally, emotionally hurt? She was pissed off yes, but how she reacts is so important.

“I can’t believe you slept with an IMP.”

“You are a god damn EMBARRASSMENT”.

She never once tells Stolas that she feels betrayed, that she thought he loved her, etc. she only cares about the fact that Stolas disrespected the Goetia family name by sleeping with a lower class demon. The themes of hierarchy in this show are so important to the story.

Stolas and Stella hated each other. She constantly talked shit about him, and he just felt empty inside. Blitzo changed that for him. Stolas NEVER forced himself onto Blizo. I have genuinely seen people call Stolas a sex offender. I don’t know how you get it that wrong. He made a joke, saying “you’re here to rravish me aren’t you?” And then that’s it. He did not force Blitzo to have sex. Blitzo is the one who chose to seduce him. Once Stolas realized Blitz was doing that, he got shy and nervous once again. Then the two did their thing and that’s the start of the main plot.

For some reason, people headcanoning Stolas as autistic is controversial, even if autistic people do it. As an autistic person, i can definitely see autistic traits in Stolas whether intentional or not. The same way I see BPD symptoms in Blitzo as someone who is borderline. There is no harm in headcanoning a character as autistic, y’all just hate Stolas. And probably won’t listen to me.

I get that this show is popular to hate right now. I miss when it wasn’t. Hopefully some day they all just leave us alone😭

(Opinion) stolas hate is based on fandom misinterpretations and not the actual show because when the fuck does he act like a “baby”??

Stolas is probably the most over-hated character in all of helluva boss. And some of the downright incorrect statements i’ve seen about stolitz drive me insane

Despite his childhood abuse, neglect and forced marriage, stolas has always been privileged. He’s set for life with wealth, has butlers and staff who feed him and care for him, and can freely travel through the human realm with no legal issues. Obviously, he’s going to have a skewed perspective on life.

Because of his forced marriage and parental neglect, stolas has never really known what love is meant to be. His father didn’t know his name because he’s a king who has a shit ton of children. Stella never loved him, and he never loved stella. They were only married to have an heir. Stolas has an over-dramatized and romanticized interpretation of love, which i think is where the ‘baby’ misinterpretation roots from. Blitzo didn’t want to fuck him, all he wanted was the grimoire. But stolas didn’t realize this and genuinely believed that his first ever friend was the one who wanted him the most. Can you see how this would fuel his romantic dreams further?

Stolas, to me, was always in love with blitzo. And (hot take incoming) did not look down on him. “But charlie, what about when he said ___?” We can go through all the quotes that supposedly look down on blitzo and i can give my reasoning as to why i dont think he sees him as lesser. Stolas has grown up with imps his whole life (butlers), and it can be argued that these staff had a closer connection to him than his own family. He’s taught to view imps as lesser, as in the hierarchy they literally are, but stolas has no issue with interacting with imps and, of course, letting an imp have intercourse with him. If stolas truly looked down on imps the way people act like he does, he’d interact with blitzo in a COMPLETELY different way. As in, he wouldn’t even treat blitzo like a human. Stolas loves blitzo so much he want to be his partner.

I will say, Hierarchy is a major theme in helluva boss with several callouts to how the ones who are higher up mistreat the lower class. Just look at mastermind. Satan doesn’t let blitzo speak. But andrealphus is allowed to talk as long as he wants. Blitzo would’ve been killed for using the grimoire, but stolas just gets a punishment. Because verbatim “your life has actual value!” It’s such an interesting theme that does not nearly get as much praise as it deserves

Another huge misinterpretation with helluva boss i see is that people think the show is trying to normalize cheating. And i’ll be honest, i can kind of see how this misinterpretation happens. As much as i adore this show, there are some writing flaws.

In my opinion, helluva boss is not trying to encourage cheating on your partners. It’s trying to show you that it’s okay to leave your abusive relationships to better your life. I may talk about this a different time because this post is mainly about stolas but god i love analyzing this show so much i just go on so many tangents.

Of course, stolas’ love for blitzo pisses of Stella. Not because stella actually loves stolas, but because she is proud to be a goetia and wants to uphold her royal, priviliged status and sees stolas as an insult to the goetic line. Her and Andrealphus’s motivation is to uphold goetia standards no matter how corrupt they truly are. They’re rich people. THEY are the ones who see imps as lesser.

THERE IS SO MUCH MORE I CAN GO INTO. How this affects Octavia and why she is justifiably upset at stolas, blitzo’s perspective, themes of the show, etc. if you wanna see my takes on these things LMK!!! I love this show dearly

If you want to counter my interpretation you’re welcome to do so, however please only do it if you’re wanting to do an actual discussion and not just trying to be rude. Some of y’all are so fucking rude to the people who like the show it’s crazy. Just be respectful and i’ll talk to you.

#self rb #helluva boss #stolas #blitzo #stella helluva boss #stolas goetia #hellaverse #vivziepop #blitzo helluva boss #stolas helluva boss

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nyxtickled · 14 hours ago

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Did you have to fly on the place with socal again? Was it awkward or were to able to switch seats?

no, we didn’t fly together at all, thankfully. the whole situation left such a shit taste in my mouth tbh and just goes to show how much i was treated like a trophy lee instead of a person.

he asked me if i wanted to go to AUNT with him back in November i think? can’t remember. i said id love to, but not to consider me a guarantee bc the odds of me being able to afford a flight, ticket and room were slim to none. he offered to share a room with me, but didn’t mention the flight or anything (which was completely fine! i did not want him to pay for my fight) and i said that would make it much easier.

then throughout December he started posting things and tagging me on here about how we’re going to be duo lers, offer gang tickles, etc. i was like oooo yikes - bc lots of moots were getting excited about hanging with me there and i was just like, aaaah i hope i can raise enough money! so, after 2-3 of these posts came in from him, i texted him and said look i hate to ask you this but you’ve p much told all of tumblr that im for SURE going to aunt with you and that we’re gonna be a gang tickle duo. if i can’t get the money together in time, are you ok with covering my flight until i can pay you back? and he agreed saying it was no problem whatsoever.

thennnn the fallout happened as shown in the texts from the night my dog got sick. i was so hurt by the whole “one day you’re asking me to borrow money and the next i’m unsafe and terrible” blah blah. i said ok hell no i’m never ever asking you for anything financially ever again, do not even worry about it, i do not need your help, i’ll get my own way there.

then we reconciled after a 2 hour phone call the next day where i just fell for all of the claims that his play partner was psychotic and that i interpreted his context incorrectly and that he didn’t mean any of it the way i took it, yatta yatta.

then everything was somewhat mellowed out. i started trying to actually plan the trip with him, asking him if he’s gotten the room yet, if he’s gotten his own plane ticket yet, etc. he never gave me a straight answer, left me on delivered a bunch, and then eventually just told me he lost his steam for aunt and wasn’t going anymore. so i said damn that sucks, hope you change your mind bc i’m sure it’ll be fun etc.

i think in his mind, if he didn’t go, i wouldn’t be able to go. so when i reached out and connected with my angel love baby girl mik and she offered me the pullout couch in her room, i was elated!!! this meant i would only have to buy the plane ticket and id be squared away!!!

well, guess what happened the moment he found that out?

suddenly there was a mad scramble for him to find a room “for us” since the hotel was already booked out. even tho i’m the one who already made alternative room plans, he asks ME to make a post in the discord and ask people to hmu if someone cancels so he can “get a room for us.” i start getting texts from him telling me i’m his “priority” and that we’re a “package deal,” all the while we haven’t even seen each other in like a month and we barely talk anymore. only hits me up to ask me how many sessions i have planned for aunt, and to ask me if he can use me as an excuse to reject potential lees bc he doesn’t know how to say no on his own. all of a sudden he wants to claim me and say “me and nyx aren’t planning anything til we get there.” like idk it just made me feel so sick and used. bc this energy was nowhere to be found when i was actually trying to plan our trip a month prior and he said he wasn’t even going anymore.

like, idk. all of it honestly made me feel like nothing more than a reputation enhancer once again; he wasn’t interested in showing up in my life for a real dynamic, but he wanted everyone to think we had a real dynamic. he wanted to be able to show up with “nyx from tumblr” at her first ever gathering and pretend we were bffs and ultra close play partners after all the shit he already put me through like it never happened. makes me kinda fucking sick.

so, you know the rest now - i end up talking to adi, i find out all the insane shit that was said about me to her AND the insane shit that was said about her to me being false. i keep my own flight and my separate plans to room with mik, and i tell him that i won’t be playing with him there, but i won’t make things weird for him, i’ll just keep my distance. i traveled alone, landed in Albany alone, made my way to a nail salon alone, and finally met up with my love my angel my baby mik. bing bang boom!

#nyx.answers

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clownthemedlizardlambs · 19 hours ago

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i have a req for a bot (since i absolutely love all of your existing ones 🫶), and you don’t have to make it, but i would be so grateful if you did ! (just bc i know you put a lot of time and effort into making these, and it can probably get exhausting with all the requests).

it’s inspired by the song we hug now - sydney rose (which i’m sure u already know of)

(only a rough idea bc i’m not very creative)

(lyric basis): ‘i have a feeling you got everything you wanted, and you’re not wasting time stuck here like me. you’re just thinking it’s a small thing that happened, the world ended when it happened to me.’

background information:

pre-crash reader and natalie had a close bond, it was a friendship that bordered romance, friends with benefits type of thing. neither of them would be with other people in this time period, it was an unspoken rule. almost like they were in a relationship, but just didn’t define it (and they also wouldn’t, because it was the 90’s, and couldn’t really publicly be together, or suggest it to the other, without backlash). only a few nights before nationals, they had an argument (possibly about their relationship), it was bad and they cut ties.

——‘i have a feeling you got everything you wanted’

—once they were all stranded in the wilderness, natalie got with Travis, in a straight relationship, and she has somebody to be close to, while reader no longer has anyone (since they have always been there for each other).

——‘and you’re not wasting time stuck here like me.’

—reader still misses natalie greatly, and is always reminiscing. it was always her, and natalie, she didn’t have anyone else, but it seems natalie has got over the both of them extremely quickly.

——‘you’re just thinking it’s a small thing that happened.’

—to the reader, it seems like they didn’t mean much to Natalie, because she had already ‘moved on’ to Travis (he’s just a replacement, an attempt to get over her, but reader doesn’t know that).

——‘the world ended when it happened to me.’

—natalie was the reader’s everything. her friend, her lover, her family. they have known each other the majority of their lives, both with shitty parents, and living in the same trailer park. natalie played soccer for the yellowjackets, but the reader worked photography & on the school paper, which is why she was strung along to nationals, as it was part of a project she was doing for one of her classes. (she had to beg coach martinez for a spot, given they couldn’t just take extra students out of school for something they weren’t apart of). after natalie and the readers argument, the reader was utterly alone, because she had never branched out to make separate relationships other than Natalie, because she always assumed they would have each other, and that no one else would understand her, or be as close to her, the way natalie was. they didn’t even find or check on each other after the plane crashed (despite both wanting to, and instinctively doing it).

scenario:

it’s been a few weeks since the crash, everyone is cooped up outside the cabin, either on the porch, a log or the forest floor, annoyance and emotions high due to the lack of food and cleanliness. travis and natalie come back from a hunt, close in proximity, hands held, giggly expressions. the reader doesn’t say anything, but maybe rolls her eyes. it doesn’t go unnoticed by everyone else and basically sparks an argument, eventually between natalie and the reader. (namely about natalie and travis, etc).

i just want angst 😭💔

again, you do not have to actually make this, but i would love if you did 🤍

Natalie Scatorccio Bot (Link at Bottom)

AN: The amount of work you put into this request is insane BTW

I’ve been sitting on this one for a bit tweaking it until I got something I liked. Trying to put your vision into a bot was a challenge (a very welcome one) and I really hope you like it and I did it justice

I played the song the entire time i wrote

The fire crackles low, its flames dancing with a quiet intensity that casts long, flickering shadows across the camp. The night air is sharp, biting at your skin, but it’s the coldness inside you that you can’t escape. You sit on a worn log, knees drawn up to your chest, watching the others with a silence that feels like an eternity. The tension hangs thick in the air, an unspoken weight pressing down on everyone. Food is running low, tempers are running high, but none of it matters. None of it can compare to the gnawing emptiness inside you.

It’s been weeks since the argument with Natalie, but the wound feels as fresh as if it happened moments ago. Words were exchanged that neither of you could take back, but you never imagined that would be the last time she’d look at you the way she once did. You never imagined that in the blink of an eye, everything would unravel. That she would walk away from it all like it had never mattered. Like you had never mattered.

But there she is now, returning from a hunt with Travis, walking side by side. Their hands brush together, and they hold on. Together. They look like a couple—the way their hands fit together like they belong there, the soft smiles on their faces, the quiet, shared laughter. It’s like a punch to the gut. You can’t look away, even as every part of you wants to. You want to hate it. You want to hate them. But no matter how hard you try, it doesn’t stop the ache.

The others are watching. You can feel their eyes on you, the weight of their expectation heavy in the air. Why are you still here? Why are you looking at me like this?

Travis and Natalie reach the fire, their presence expanding like a living, breathing thing that swallows up the space around them. They stand too close to each other, their shared joy stinging like salt in an open wound. It doesn’t matter if the hunt was successful. No single kill could ever outweigh the way Natalie looks at him now.

Like you never existed.

Mari lets out a sharp sigh from a nearby stump. It’s exaggerated, clearly meant to be heard. “Oh, please, this is getting ridiculous,” she mutters.

Your heart picks up, thudding in your chest like a drumbeat you can’t escape. You don’t want to hear this. You don’t want to hear what everyone else is thinking, but you can feel their eyes on you, their judgment hanging in the air.

Shauna is the first to speak. “It’s just... awkward now. Don’t you think?” Her voice is soft but laden with meaning as she glances between you and Natalie. Her eyes flick to Travis, who stands uncomfortably beside her, unsure if he should speak up.

“Awkward?” Natalie’s voice sharpens, though her smile doesn’t falter. “What are you all getting at?”

Lottie, who’s sitting cross-legged on the porch, shrugs nonchalantly, her voice calm but cutting. “I mean... it was always you two, right?” She gestures between you and Natalie. “Now it’s just... different.” She doesn’t need to finish her sentence. The implication is clear.

The air between you and Natalie feels suffocating. Every breath feels like it takes more effort than the last. You want to scream. You want to throw something—anything—but instead, all that comes out is a bitter, tight laugh.

Natalie scoffs, like the suggestion is ludicrous. “That was before,” she says, her words slicing through the air like daggers.

The weight of everyone’s attention is like a physical thing pressing on your skin. You don’t want to do this—not now, not here, in front of them all. But then, Natalie’s eyes land on you, and it’s like the world shifts beneath you.

Her gaze isn’t cruel. It isn’t mocking.

It’s worse.

It’s indifferent.

Like you were nothing more than a brief moment in her life. Something easily erased.

You let out a bitter laugh, shaking your head. “You really moved on that fast?”

Natalie’s eyes narrow. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means it’s funny how you don’t even care,” you snap, your voice sharp, the words tasting like acid in your mouth. “Not about me, not about us.”

“There was no us,” Natalie replies, her voice a cold snap as she steps closer, something dangerous flashing in her eyes.

The words land like a slap, like a punch straight to your gut.

“No?” Your voice wavers, despite your best efforts to keep it steady. “So I imagined all of it? You sneaking through my window at night? You saying I was the only person who really understood you?” Your breath catches in your throat. “You kissing me like I was the only thing keeping you alive?”

For a moment, her face twitches. Her jaw clenches. She looks away, like she can’t bear to meet your eyes, but you see it—the brief flicker of guilt that flashes across her face, there and gone in an instant. She turns back to you, her jaw set tight, her eyes cold as ice. “We didn’t have anything,” she says, her voice hard as stone. “You just couldn’t—”

“Don’t lie,” you cut in, rising to your feet, hands trembling at your sides. “We had everything, Nat. Everything. We were—” You pause, trying to steady yourself. “I was everything for you.”

For a second, you see it. The hesitation in her eyes. Like she almost wants to reach out. Almost. But she doesn’t. Instead, she just presses her lips together, shaking her head. “That was before, okay? That was before we—” She cuts herself off, her eyes flicking toward Travis, standing a little too close.

You laugh again, but it’s bitter, dry, and hollow. “Yeah, that was before. Before you got someone else to fill the space.” The words are like nails in your throat. “Someone who doesn’t leave when things get hard.”

Travis shifts uncomfortably, glancing between the two of you. He’s caught in the middle, unsure of how to handle the situation. But it’s not him you’re angry at. Not really.

“You don’t get it,” Natalie says, her voice softer now, almost like she’s explaining something to a child. “We were nothing back then. We were just... two people who—”

“No,” you interrupt, your voice rising as the frustration begins to boil over. “No, don’t you dare try to make it sound like it meant nothing.” You take a step toward her, not caring who’s watching anymore. “I gave you everything, Nat. I trusted you. I loved you.” Your throat tightens, but you don’t stop. “But you moved on. You didn’t even care that you broke me.”

For a moment, she just stares at you, her expression softening as if she might say something—might apologize. But she doesn’t. Instead, she just looks away, pulling her hand from Travis’s like it burns her.

“I had to,” she whispers, her voice barely audible. “I had to move on. I couldn’t stay stuck, waiting for... for something that wasn’t real.”

The words hit like a punch to the gut. You want to scream, but you can’t. You stand frozen, the weight of her words sinking in, heavy and suffocating. And in that moment, you realize—maybe she never cared as much as you did. Maybe to her, you were always just a small thing.

And maybe it was the world to you, but to her? It was nothing more than a fleeting moment.

Link -> 🦎

#yellowjackets #natalie scatorccio #natalie scatorccio bot #natalie scatorccio x reader #janitor bot #janitor ai #j.ai bot #j.ai #jai bot #🦎🐏 bots #🦎🐏 requests #🦎🐏 asks

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magix-winx-club · 8 hours ago

Text

Beth was a great Character, you're just misogynistic

Sorry for the title, just want ya'll to read this.

TW: mention of, SA, violence, abuse,

Why Beth is an amazing character and could have been even better:

Female experience in the Apocalypse:

We don't focus enough on it, especially in The Walking Dead. We got hints throughout the show. For example the issue with Lori and Birth specifically the talk about her losing the baby with Hershel.

Second Maggie's experience with the Governor. And even though that storyline was well executed to a certain degree. We do not get the full ramifications after her conflict with Glenn was resolved. Yes once more the Female Experience was focused on the man not the woman. Even though the show called Glenn out on his behaviour, it still was about a man feeling angry instead of a woman going through something traumatic.

So, Beth's experience would have been important going forward. Since she did experience attempted rape. How would she react to people in charge like someone aggressive, loud, outspoken, and unpredictable like Dawn and Gorman?

How would she take Abraham's unpredictability and outspokenness? How would she deal with the socially inappropriate comments Eugene makes?

(Again this is not about the men and “oh but they wouldn't do anything” or he is “harmless” etc.) This is about a trauma response.

So what trauma did Beth experience?

Firstly she was taken against her will, most likely forcefully in some way (her arm was broken). Her agency was taken, her free will, and the (somewhat) security of her surroundings, mainly her family member Daryl who she knows she can trust.

So she is kidnapped, put in an unfamiliar environment, unfamiliar people, and she has no idea how to navigate such a situation since she has never been in this situation. The situation mainly being, can she trust them? Can she trust what they are saying? Who are these people? How does it work here and what are their intentions?

The disorientation she must have felt waking up in that environment must have been traumatic. We see with the camera work if we look at Beth's timeline. Her last words are "I’m not leaving you”. Cut to the car speeding away, cut to Beth waking up in an unfamiliar place. These cuts are very abrupt, confusing, and scary. It serves the purpose of confusing the viewer. (What happened to Beth? I think Daryl put it best “she was just gone") and it makes the viewer anxious, nervous, and the need to know what is going on. So we can imagine that Beth feels these things too.

Furthermore, the show makes a point to show that the world is not what it used to be. I mean the Team Family lived in a prison after all. So having Beth wake up visually in a clean room. Her face clean, her hair brushed out nicely, and professional medical care is like a break from the (her true) reality Beth lived in. Another point is the music and the way she wakes up. It is almost like a dream sequence. Like she had just been in an accident, but all is well now since she is in the hospital. Almost like a sleeping beauty type of deal (but modernized).

To sum up, her first Trauma is the shift of reality, specifically of her surroundings. The funeral home was not safe, it was a trap. She is no longer with family, but her agency, which she had to a certain point (cannot control things like walkers, or people attacking their home) is taken completely away. Lastly, the new surroundings differ from what she knows from the outside. It is like back at the farm “we were fooling ourselves into thinking we were safe” and “you don't know what it is like out there,” but Beth does know now. And even though Grady likes to pretend that the outside world did not touch the hospital, it did. Maybe not in the sense of walkers, people looting the place, dirt everywhere, but the mentality presented to us, the question of “Survival of the Fittest” is present in Grady. We see this theory of survival of the fittest through the first 4 seasons, but not in this scenario where people deliberately want the weak to enslave them and claim it is saving them.

Where do we see Survival of the Fittest?

Randall and Dale

Is this a world for kids?

Disability: Hershel losing his leg

The Governor and the way he manipulates the “weak” residents of Woodberry and takes out the “fittest” f.ex. the military guys.

Does sickness discrimination against the weak and the strong? (The flu storyline)

So now we have Beth's storyline mixed with the question survival of the fittest. Beth is constantly underestimated and Dawn constantly says/tries to show that Beth is not strong. I don't want to focus on how this can be used to your advantage but the mental tool it can take on you. This is a form of demeaning people, keeping them in “their place”. It fucks with your head when things in your past (suicide scar) is used against you, your appearance (Beth is skinny, with big blue eyes and generally deemed innocent and non threatening looking). She outright says “I am strong” but no one believes her. Which is a form of silencing therefore further taking her agency away from her. At one point does Beth start to believe this? would it take months or years for this kind of gaslighting to have an effect? This can be compared to Daryl’s inner monologue in Season 2 when Merle tells him “no one is ever going to love you but me little brother” which we can guess as viewers is something he was told/taught for years and Daryl believed it.

Now this could have been interesting to see in Alexandria. Before everything happened with the fall of the Farm and the Barn incident. (Even to an extent the prison era) Beth would have fit in perfectly in Alexandrias society. The sweet farmer's daughter who takes care of a child that is not hers, helps out with chores, sings, reads the Bible, and hopes for summer picnics and birthdays (which in no way is a bad thing, I love that side of Beth!). Now she has encountered Grady, a place that was from the appearance like the old world and Beth was believed to fit in - so is Alexandria. How does she handle the constant shift of what she's supposed to believe the world is? Is it like Grady? The road from Atlanta to D.C.? Or is it like Alexandria? Could it be like all three or could Alexandria be just another “false” hope?

To sum up, the Trauma of being taken out of one surrounding and what you believe the world is like and being put in another with different rules and she has no idea how to navigate them since she does not know them and does not have any protection from her family being there. (Grady's system of running things is so vastly different from the Prison, also let's call Grady's system what it is: Slavery. They kidnap people and make them work “work of what you owe and then you can leave” “I haven't seen it work like that”)

Now to the people: Beth has experienced different kinds of traumas with the people in Grady.

Gaslighting (“you were alone, we saved you, you owe us, you are not strong,...”)

Physical abuse (Dawn hitting her, her scars on her face, bruising, a cast on her arm)

Mental abuse (the doctor making her kill someone and then claiming she messed up (also falls into the category of gaslighting, having to rely on the same doctor to not get SAd by Gorman))

Sexual abuse (that is mostly the female experience. He is in charge therefore in a position of power, he is older, and she is just a weak young woman) the abuse was: the fear of it happening, the lollipop incident (yes that is a traumatic event), the constant watching from Gorman, how trivialize it is by the police officers “laughed about the poor girl getting raped”, the top person in charge does nothing to stop it (“ you know what is happening here and you let it happen”), and then the SA in Dawn's office)

How is it that we never get to see this female struggle? This (more often) female fear and trauma? Michonne and Andrea traveled alone, but this fear never comes up. We have one mention of an incident where Randell tells the story of the two teenage girls. But honestly my biggest fear in this world would be traveling alone as a woman and encountering men. It is already bad nowadays. Can you imagine this in an Apocalypse?

So why do we ignore this very real fear women face? Why do we kill the one character who actually has a storyline, who focuses on this female fear and female trauma, without any connection to a man or the typical motherhood storyline TWD does?

Why not show that this was ACTUALLY traumatic. Since we even see Beth smile at Dawn after getting SA, killing him, and then leaving the office to go escape? I am glad Beth could put on a smile so Dawn wouldn't know but why do we never see Beth scared, look around her, keep an eye on the door while she sleeps, even trying to lock the door in some way so no one can get in while she sleeps. Why do we not see a far away look when she is trying to first process what happened. There are soo many trauma responses, and everyone is valid in the way they respond to trauma. So why do we not take trauma into account in female storyline? This is my biggest issue with TWD. Lori got one scene of her crying after Shane SAd her and then it was back to the love triangle (which is absolutely disgusting). Why did Rosita not get to be angry with Eugene like Abraham? There are so many storylines even when the woman is involved that focuses on the male response instead.

Let Beth be human, with human responses and more than just another dead girl. Show me how she would cope with her personal space being violated, the perception of personhood being breached. Could she react aggressively when Eugene makes a socially inappropriate comment. Would she be tense, nervous, keep an eye out for him? How about Abraham's imposing statue? What about men in Alexandria? Could she struggle socializing with men? Keeping to the people she knows and clinging to the safety they once represented to her like Glenn, Rick, Carl and Daryl. They are the men that never did anything to her. Or could she even pull away there and struggle to come to terms that they are safe but also men. And men had not been safe for women in Grady.

How could Beth respond to Deanna knowing how Dawn presented herself. Would she be uneasy? Would she be able to tell that Deanna is not like Dawn since she knows the signs of a bad leader because of Dawn.

I am just mad how we ignore this big (and unique to TWD) storyline of a young woman witnessing her father get beheaded, her home destroyed, her relationship with Daryl, her kidnapping, enslavement, physical/mental/sexual abuse? All that just to further other people's storylines for a couple of episodes just to forget about Beth after that.

What do you think? Comment below

#beth greene #twd #female narrative #female storyline #twd beth #twd daryl #bethyl #the walking dead

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real-fire-emblem-takes · 19 hours ago

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I think the reason why "Fire Emblem" is the weird kid at the nintendo franchies table is because they don't really have a main charcter throughout their series.

Like, Legend of Zelda has Link, Mario Mario, Kirby Kirby, Pikmin the Pikmin/Olimar etc.

A few exptions that could be said is like, Xenoblade. But seeing as they have 3 games so they can just pick any MC they want for the time being to rep it.

Meanwhile the most noteable FE guy is Marth from number of apparances, but if you remove remakes that's like, two games. Even then, he was more in JP only games.

Other people who could have became the face of FE as the flagship mascot could have been

-Lyn: One of the most popular girls in FE. Was from the first US release of the game as a main lord. She most likely can't because she came at an akward time in gaming and would be seen as "wifu bait" to a lot of annoying people.

-Ike: One of the most popular lords in FE. a HUGE fan favorite and even cult following in Smash Bros (Like Smash HATES FE, but they chill with Ike. Because We Like ike). Most likly why he can't be the icon is Sales numbers. Love the Tellious saga but I'll be real, I did not contribute to the sales figure like most of you and played it years later. Also it's heavily implied through writing and breaking of story conventions that he's Gay/Ace/demi. And while Nintndo's super mario said "Gay people cool" it's a Multi billion dollar company so I don't think they'll want that.

-Chrom: For the 3DS people, Chrom is the most memeorible lord out of the bunch. Was the face of the game for a while, sorry lucina and robin fans, but chrom's popularity was bigger at the time of the game. Most likely why he can't be. well. it's Chrom and people's opions changed over time.

-Edelgard: Switch girlies, this one is for you. WE know you love badass women who break so many ethics we make conventions after it. There isn't really much reason to explain the why she can, but the reasons why she can't are kinda lame. Like Ike, she's outright shown being bisexual. And you can't really market that in some places. Plus, to say this the least. She is one of the most divisive FE characters because of how much Nuance is in 3 houses. Love or hate her, she brings out WAY to much from people to be a masctor charcter (Won't stop the FEH alts though). Plus, She's like tied to the other 2 lords that it's like the contract for Who Framed Rogger Rabbit saying "Bugs bunny and Mickey Mouse must be on screen for the same amount of time. Donald Duck and Daffy Duck (last names unrealated) must be on screen for the same amount of time."

-Ephram: he's here as the sacred stones rep. Reson why he can't. he's from sacred stones. that's a cult following in the FE community, sorry but he's not mascotting anything.

-Celica: With her apparance and precness in Engage, a good argument could be made for her. She's a really well written charcter but comes back to the issue of the amount of peopel who've played her game.

-Alfonse: GOTCHA GAME BABY ITS THE GOTCHA GAME GUY HE PROTAGNIST AND GAMBLGIN GOOD

-Veronica: The real rep from FEH. She is a very interesting character that takes up a lot of the story spot light with her growth into learning empathy and understanding. She isn't very static compared to Sherna (She did't even chage after learning she could have been an orphan swapped years ago into the role o a princess after a magical fairy land adventure. This HAPPENED IN BOOK 4. THE FUCK YOU MEAN SHE BARELY CHANGED.) and Alfonse (He changes but, not as much.). Plus she does have more unquie abilities compared to most of FE Cast which is good for a flagship charcter. Really the only reason she did't become FE's mascot and just FEH's is because, it's a gotcha game charcter. people shit on those ALL the time.

Anyway, next CYL they should make all characters votable again and say "Whoever wins the most popular vote will be the Mascot for Fire Emblem until the next game"

why is eirika's cringefail mid-of-all-trades brother here and not the glass canon queen herself 🤨🤨🤨

#fe #fire emblem #fandom takes #character hate

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vikkirosko · 1 day ago

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can you do platonic charlie, camilla, alastor, angel dust with !pcprincipal reader overlord who is very cool and chill but when he can be very furious when someone is racist, homophobic etc. or uses microargession

Platonic headcanons Chill overlord

🌈 Charlie Morningstar x overlord!Reader 🎶

Charlie didn't have many overlords he knew. She knew who they were, but she didn't know many of them personally. She knew Alastor, Rosie, and you. You lived in a hotel and only a few people knew that you were an overlord. You never hid it, but you also didn't advertise it, not wanting to be treated differently because of it. Charlie was glad to have you, because she knew you were a good person. You were calm even when someone insulted you, without responding aggressively to aggression. You were relaxed and there wasn't much that could make you lose your temper. But one day it did happen. When Charlie told you about her meeting with Adam, your peace of mind collapsed

The more she talked about how rude he was, the more angry you got. She even thought for a moment that you were angry with her, but when she heard how you were indignant at Adam, she realized that he was the reason for your anger. At that moment, she understood the reason why Adam's behavior made you so angry. She's noticed something similar about you before, but she didn't think it was really like that. You didn't like people like that. You didn't like those who were racist, homophobic, those who belittled others just because they were different, regardless of whether they talked about it openly or used microaggression. You didn't tolerate such things, and Charlie could understand that. She also had no sympathy for such people, and Adam, with his rudeness and disdainful attitude towards others, upset you, despite the fact that you did not even meet in person

She knew that you were trying to make at least your neighborhood a better place. You used your powers and authority as an overlord, keeping control of your neighborhood and developing a business there. But you were careful who you hired. You didn't allow those who angered you and behaved rudely towards others to work for you. For sinners, your policy seemed strange, but those who suffered from such personalities could feel comfortable working for you, knowing that they were safe there and they would not hear rude comments or insults from you or others. Charlie liked this approach, even though it bothered her that sometimes you could be too short-tempered when it came to this topic

Sometimes she wondered what would happen if you met Adam in person. She didn't want to cause conflicts, but it seemed to her that you could stand up to him. Charlie believed that they could at least try to find a peaceful solution to their problems, but that didn't mean it was easy for her to communicate with Adam. The fact that you could be there to help her deal with it could really help her, at least mentally, and she knew that if she asked you to do it, you would agree to help

🕷 Angel Dust x overlord!Reader 💖

Angel was familiar with several overlords, but of them, you were probably the most pleasant to talk to. You were calm, relaxed, you didn't treat him with disdain. You really saw Angel as a friend and you enjoyed spending time with him. Sometimes he even came to your office knowing that you were an important person. None of your employees dared to say a word about his work or himself. He liked being in your office, but sometimes he witnessed your peace of mind crumble. One of those times was when you came to pick him up from the studio

You agreed to meet, but Valentino was in no hurry to let him leave the studio, even though he had already finished his work. Angel thought he was in trouble again. He couldn't say anything to the boss, listening as he insulted him, calling him a variety of words, but Valentino was abruptly pushed away, and Angel saw a familiar back. It was you. You came to meet him and, without waiting, went in search of him. You heard their conversation, at least some of it, and now you were furious. It was the first time he saw you like this, he didn't even need to see your face to know that you were very angry. And Valentino understood it too. He understood that and knew who you were. He tried to talk to you, but you didn't care what he said. You weren't going to listen to a bastard like him

You took Angel away from there, muttering obscenities. It was only in the car that he found out what exactly made you so angry. You were angry because Valentino was so unpleasant and rude, especially towards Angel. You didn't allow such people to work for you or work with you, you weren't going to tolerate such people, and you certainly weren't going to allow such people to insult your friends. Angel understood that he could not leave his boss and quit his job, because his soul was still in his power, but perhaps the fact that he was in some sense under your protection would not have allowed Valentino to cross the line

There weren't many good people in Hell, but you were one of the few people he could trust. You weren't sinless, or you wouldn't have ended up in Hell, but Angel knew you were a good person. You were someone he trusted, and he knew that if things got really bad, he could come to you for help or protection. Even if you had to face three powerful overlords to do it

📻 Alastor x overlord!Reader🎙

Alastor often tried to be polite, even to those who annoyed him. He was a gentleman and his smile was always on his face. One of the people he was comfortable talking to was you. You, like him, were an overlord. You were doing your own business, taking care of those who lived on your territory. You were a good overlord, and just like Alastor, you were hard to piss off. Even if you were insulted to your face, you didn't start swearing back. But Alastor really liked to see when your composure cracked and you started to get angry. It didn't happen that often, but it did happen

He witnessed how several sinners, representatives of one of Hell's businessmen, came to you. Alastor kept you company that day, and you didn't mind him being present during the negotiations. But when one of the sinners made a rather racist comment, Alastor saw anger flash in your eyes. This comment was meant to be a joke and wasn't directed at you, but it wasn't necessary. It was enough for you to lose your temper. You weren't going to tolerate such people, much less do business with them

You didn't tolerate those who belittled or were rude to people who were different from them. You didn't hire racists, homophobes, or other people like that. You took this very seriously, and Alastor was even surprised. He didn't expect that something like this could destroy your peace of mind so easily. You kept trying to find something good in others, even in Hell, and he couldn't help but notice that you were a little naive in this regard. But he wasn't going to interfere in your business. He was even amused to see how your expression changed when you were angry

You and Alastor had different views on the world, but he did not allow himself such unpleasant things, and even more so did not allow himself to be deceived by stereotypes. That was one of the reasons why you talked to him. Alastor did not judge others by their race, gender, or who they loved. He was cruel and scary, but you were no better than him. But at least partially, your views still coincided

🗡 Carmilla Carmine x overlord!Reader ⚔️

You were one of the few overlords with whom Carmilla maintained a strong, friendly relationship. You've known each other for a long time, she knew that you were calm, cool-headed, and there wasn't much that could really piss you off. Those who lived on your territory could feel safer than in other places. You visited her periodically and you could chat quietly before the meetings you held for overlords. But during one of these meetings, a young overlord made a mistake. They made a pretty racist comment about Carmilla. She wouldn't have given it that much thought, but it pissed you off

You weren't shouting, you weren't threatening, but your eyes were blazing with rage. You spoke coldly, firmly, and it was enough for the others to understand that you would not tolerate such a thing. Carmilla knew you couldn't stand it. You didn't tolerate when someone was rude or cruel just because others were different, you didn't tolerate when someone allowed stupid stereotypes to block the voice of reason. You've always been strict about it in your territory. You didn't commit hate crimes. Such people couldn't work for you. And even if those who did this were overlords, you weren't going to turn a blind eye to it

That was the little thing that you couldn't ignore. That was what made you mad, even though you weren't usually like that. You were cool-headed and usually made decisions with your head. But when something like this happened, your emotions tried to get the better of you. Carmilla witnessed several of your emotional outbursts, and she couldn't blame you for it. It was important to you, and you weren't going to stop following your principles even in Hell

She was surprised by how human you could sometimes be, even after years of living in Hell as a sinner. You didn't want to be like those who harmed others simply because you felt personal, unfounded hatred. You knew it might seem silly from the outside, but you weren't going to let something like this continue. At least your territory could become a safe place and Carmilla supported your aspirations

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel headcanons #Carmilla Carmine #Carmilla Carmine x Reader #Alastor #Alastor x Reader #Angel Dust #Angel Dust x Reader #Charlie Morningstar #Charlie Morningstar x Reader

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