#but i'm inactive lmao

[caprisc-art]

HOW HAVE I NOT KNOWN YOU'VE HAD A TUMBLR FOR SO LONG!?! I'VE BEEN A HUGE FAN OF YOUR ART FOR A LONG WHILE ON DEVIANTART!

5 years later I see this in my inbox, holy heck i've been inactive!! Thank you sO MUCH hrghghNGGH I try to get more active here on tumblr though!!

[momentomori24]

[This has been sitting in my draft for a while lol]

When it comes to Curly's failings, I always see people bring up his obvious failure to protect Anya and him prioritising Jimmy, who was the rapist in that situation. Which is completely valid btw and we should rake him through the coals for that alone even more. But I also see too many people saying that Curly "didn't enable Jimmy" or playing softball for his actions. And I could maybe see where that comes from if that incident was the only thing we had to point to-- but that wasn't all he did, is it? Curly being indifferent or not taking Jimmy's mistreatment and belittlement of Anya seriously was hinted at so much earlier than that.

Namely, the very first time we play from Curly's point of view. Let's just skip the fact that Curly was putting everyone in danger by not taking his psych evals seriously and simply giving the same answers to pass them even tho he was shown literal minutes after this scene being clearly not-sane, and go straight to the point I actually wanna get into. Which is this:

These scenes in isolation wouldn't be that bad. From his pov, it's played off as comical and it is. Jimmy being a brony (not really lmao) and getting playfully dragged over it is funny. But unfortunately this is the first example out of many for Curly's complacency. Anya is complaining about Jimmy not taking his psych evals or her seriously, which is easy to believe considering how much he rags on her for "not being a good nurse" (she kept Curly alive on hopes and dreams how dare you). So he keeps making her do silly and inappropriate reports she clearly doesn't wanna do, which is kinda shitty (also borders on harassment). But rather than actually saying something about Jimmy's behaviour or even acknowledging how it sucks he says this:

Mate, that's not a good thing 💀 He's clearly aware that the problem is Jimmy's lack of respect for Anya specifically. He knows that if he, his friend and a man in power, were the one doing the evals Jimmy wouldn't try that disrespect. But it's Anya, a meek woman who ranks lower than him so he thinks he can get away with it (which he DOES), and Curly's shown as comfortable in knowing that. He doesn't chew Jimmy out for making Anya uncomfortable nor does he reassure her that he will do something about it. All he does is take it off her hands this once and helps Jimmy power through it to get a good diagnosis (even tho we know he's DEFINITELY not sane either). He doesn't even mention Anya's discomfort or confront him on his inappropriate behaviour, just teases Jimmy in good fun instead because he doesn't think of it as anything serious. It's subtle and pretty minor in comparison to everything else, but I think it's worth pointing out. Especially because this convo takes place after Jimmy had assaulted her, which makes this so much worse.

If you need any more evidence of Curly being an enabler you need not look further than Anya herself. And I'm not just talking about the way he failed her here-- I'm talking about Anya's own view of Curly and the way said view influences her actions.

Just look at her choice of wording. "What would you have done". This is in response to him saying that she could've come to him if she were feeling stressed, which she-- in his eyes-- didn't. The question itself implies that she had no faith in Curly to actually help despite his insistence that he would've, which I think is significant because it shows that she's very much aware of Curly's shortcomings when it comes to her situation AND it's one of the first (or the first time) she actually verbalised her lack of trust towards him or anyone directly. Prior to this scene she had told him about her rape and the rapist, presumably because she trusted him to handle it. And he dismissed her because the rapist was his best friend, and that evidently deeply scarred her. Enough so that she secretly took the gun and hid it someplace else and didn't even tell Curly were that was, because she knows that if Curly has access to it there's a so much greater chance Jimmy will have too, insinuated by the line "the least I can do is make sure he never gets it either". Speaking about the gun:

It sucks so bad that this perception of him isn't even inaccurate nor unjustified. That despite everything Jimmy had done to her and everything he could still do to her, he'd very likely still not allow her access to the gun for protection. Because that's exactly what he didn't do anyway. He didn't attempt to keep her safe from Jimmy, instead he just pretended that nothing was wrong and still let Jimmy's belittlement of her pass. He didn't give her the gun after the incident, because she wouldn't have hid the case if he had. Despite his desperate reassurance that he'd do anything, he did nothing but make it worse for her and she KNOWS that. It's so frustrating knowing he entrusted the axe to Swansea when he needed it but not the gun to Anya when she needed it too. Also this:

The fact that his knee-jerk reaction to her admitting that she's pregnant was "Who would you--" is so fucked, especially considering she's already told him what happened. "Who would you" what? Who would you fuck? Who would you have sex with? That choice of wording drives me up a wall-- SHE wouldn't and didn't do anything or anyone. That was JIMMY. The potential sentence implies that she had any choice or agency in her pregnancy. She didn't. And the fact that Curly had to ask "who" insinuates that he's been putting Jimmy's action out of sight and out of mind the whole time, choosing to not think about them or what happened to Anya at all. And considering he still made her do Jimmy's evaluations despite being able to do them himself and literally didn't even think of making sure she gets psych evals done too--especially AFTER getting sexually assaulted--that might actually be the case (I haven't seen anyone make a stink about that piece of info so I'm going to because what kinda colossal fuck up IS that??).

I vaguely had a post like this in mind but seeing so many people be like "well Anya did some wrong stuff too like leaving Curly alone with Jimmy but you don't get mad at HER for that so why is Curly not doing anything about Jimmy being alone with Anya so different??" actually makes me want to blow some people up. Jimmy's an abuser, sure, but Anya has no real reason to believe that he'd actually harm Curly. From her perspective, they were close, close enough that Curly would not only let Jimmy continuously disrespect her but also get away with assaulting her too. That, and she knows that Jimmy was closer to Curly than anyone and more likely to be civil around him than he ever was to her. She has barely any reasons to suspect Jimmy would harm Curly when they're alone. Curly, on the other hand, has every fucking reason on the planet to think Jimmy would harm her when they're alone. He knows he raped her (likely in her room at night too). He knows that he sexually harasses her. He knows that he doesn't respect her at all. And that was BEFORE the crash. Anya tried insisting on giving Curly his medicine, only for Jimmy to keep aggressively insisting that he'll take care of it despite her protests. Curly didn't try to keep them separate at all even though he was the Captain and had the power to do so. And this should go without saying, but leaving your rapist alone with his best friend that he was close to and enabled/protected him and leaving your friend alone with the woman he raped (and might have repeatedly assaulted given his free access to her) is NOT THE SAME and I'm going to start chucking some people down a waterfall because what the fuck is that argument 💀 Actually leave it to the fandom of the game where the rape of a woman is the catalyst for the events that unfold to use her trauma to defend the guy that enabled it in the first place. Bloody hell.

The reason why this whole Curly discourse pisses me off is because it-- from what I can see-- ONLY brings up his failures 1-0 days before the crash and the Dead Pixel scene (or all the discussion around other points are drowned out by those two). Those scenes, while important to talk about, are not the only things he's done, and focussing on those as the only things is a mistake that comes short of understanding the issue. When it comes to Curly the main defences I see for him are "he was trying not to escalate the situation" and "he was trying to keep things under control the best he can" and "he was waiting for the right time to help Anya", but those don't work when you look at the bigger picture of everything he's done.

He half-assed through his psych eval despite clearly not being sane (and KNOWING he's barely sane, he literally admits it to Jimmy's face). He still continued to task her with Jimmy's psych evals. He brushed over Jimmy's sexual harassment of her as a joke. He didn't think about making sure she got psych evals done herself after being raped. He gave Swansea the axe but didn't give Anya the gun despite it being for "unrest amongst the crew" (whatever the hell THAT means). He let her assault slip his mind that she had to remind him. He's literally a blond man. He took no action to hold Jimmy responsible for anything, and prioritised how his violation of Anya would affect him rather than her. He ignored her demands for him to get rid of Jimmy. He still allowed Jimmy free reign of the ship as co-pilot even after he was openly fantasising about killing everyone and had a major motive and the means to do just that. He was potentially thinking of making her miscarry to cover up what happened. He was so accustomed to her sucking up being disrespected and disturbed that he didn't even notice a difference in her behaviour until she hid the fucking gun. There's so much other shit he's done and hasn't done, and not talking about them or glossing over them makes it so easy for people to argue that he isn't actually an enabler or just minimise the severity of his neglect.

And while I'm already dragging Curly through the mud, I might as well just drag Swansea too. I've seen too many people being like "Anya should've told Swansea instead" and "Swansea was the one that actually took responsibility". Like, y'all realise he's not that much better than Curly, right? He already knew about what happened to Anya-- he admits it to Jimmy's face-- but he didn't do shit. He knew, but he still got completely shitfaced for months despite her earlier protestation to that (for very understandable reasons). He knew, but he still let Jimmy have the axe AND be alone with Anya while having it. He knew, but when Anya locked herself in the Medical and Daisuke and Jimmy asked for his help he didn't budge nor really showed any care. He knew, but the reason he finally decided to do something about Jimmy wasn't Anya, it was Daisuke. Her suffering and her eventual death weren't enough for him to take action either.

This game, on top of everything else, is a great depiction of rape culture. It doesn't just include the rapists, but the people (mostly men) that stay silent, do nothing, make excuses for and protect the perpetrator for whatever reason, and Swansea and Curly (Curly way more so than Swansea) are both active contributors to the environment that allowed for evil to flourish and continue unhindered until it destroyed them all. And while that arguably doesn't make them evil themselves or as bad as Jimmy, they are so much more a part of the bigger problem than the fandom likes to admit.

[Ok since this is kinda gaining a bit of traction please consider helping these guys out here, here and here. Thanks!]

[somewhereincairparavel]

im so emotionally attached to jason grace it's not even funny atp. i literally think about him all day, I'm not exaggerating pls someone tell me they feel this way too 😮‍💨

[the-writing-mobster]

Y'all I'm sorry I've been so inactive, it's genuinely been a really rough couple of months for me, plus I've been trying to write my original novel through all of this turmoil. Rest assured I haven't gone anywhere, and your favorite art and stories from me will be back eventually, I just need to get through this period and find my motivation again.

THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR SUPPORT!!! BEAR WITH ME NOW!!

[taintandviolent]

y'all are hyping me up so much I'm afraid part 2 won't live up to the hype dkjhsdkfjdhfksjhf. praying that it does.

[yansurnummu]

WIP Wriday

tagged by @captain-of-silvenar!

here's a bit from a chapter of THIKL I've been working on, ft. Drals' first time meeting Torvesard :)

-

“Of all the realms I’ve walked, I somehow always end up here,” a voice said to Drals’ right. “Fargrave. Beautiful, isn't it?”

Drals glanced towards the voice’s owner. The sound was clearly Dremora, harsh and grating yet with a tone that he would almost describe as soft. He was tall and broad, bare-chested with scarred reddish skin, his features strong and pointed with black horns that curved back over his head. His cloudy gaze was focused away from Drals, over the city below.

Drals took a quick look behind him for anyone else, wondering why, of all people, this Dremora was accosting him.

“Weird place,” Drals muttered dismissively. “Weird people.”

The Dremora’s attention snapped quickly towards him.

“And what of you, mortal?” He cocked his head to the side, his eyes sizing Drals up. “What business might a servant of Hermaeus Mora have in this plane between planes?”

“I’m no one’s servant,” Drals hissed, his upper lip twitching. “If anything, he’s more like a terrible landlord. If I stink like ink, it’s because he won’t fix the leaks in my bloody ceiling.”

“Hmph.” There was something almost like a smirk on the Dremora’s face, though it was hard to tell. “Perhaps you and I aren’t so different after all.” He stepped closer, coming to a stop at Drals’ side.

“Who are you supposed to be, then?” Drals asked, barely masking his curiosity.

“I am someone who has searched millenia for purpose,” he said, his eyes narrowing. “And now that I am as close as I am to finding it, I will not have it torn from my grasp.”

Drals eyed the Dremora, taken aback by the sudden intensity behind his words. “Do you understand me, mortal?”

[princescar]

AI Junko with these nails would go so hard

[rainofthetwilight]

ngl being on nintwt makes me realize how inactive ninblr Actually is...

like, for comparision (from what I can tell), the amount of posts that are posted like every single hour on a daily basis are the amount of posts ninblr posts when a trailer (yknow what, maybe even season) drops

[foo1ishheart554]

thinking about getting back to drawing f1 again but I have so many ideas:

[xxswanwranglerxx]

Thats really fucking gay,, say no homo or it IS gay

I mean, I COULD say no homo but I'm afraid that'd be lying..

[nrd-answers]

Happy New Year from the NRD Ask Blog :]

I want to start this off by saying thank you to everyone who has enjoyed my art and my characters thus far. I started this as a little one off fun event on my main blog, yet now it's exploded into this huge story with so much more engagement and support than I'd ever anticipated. It means so much to me, you have no idea

This blog pulled me through some rough patches, some crazy shit in my life, and I'm really grateful for the people who've stuck around when I was inactive (for months cough cough). You all helped motivate me to try new things with my art, and it's very encouraging to see people actually like my characters

I have so much planned for this blog, so many character arcs and art and designs, and I hope you all are excited for the story they have to tell.

Happy New Year from me, NRD, and all the other characters you have yet to meet, and thank you for listening :]

[ghetto-omega]

Hi I'm not sure exactly what I am (not sure of any terms yet but definitely feeling like omega is right) but your blog has been particularly eye opening because now I'm like "holy shit. I'm normal!!!" And excuse me while I go through your blog until I can't stay awake anymore xx

HELLO BELOVED !!!

We are all learning together I'm so glad I could be of help to you !!! Feel free to spam like and interact whenever !!!! I know I'm still learning terms n stuff for the spaces I frequent in, it's no rush to figure yourself out !!!

Mentally we are nesting together 🫶🏾🫶🏾

[lady-arryn]

what is your url mean? I like Game of Thrones and assume Arryn like House Arryn idk if you like Lysa in particular

It is a reference to House Arryn (one of my favourite ASOIAF houses), but just a general one, not to any characters in particular.

I remember when I created this url it was very popular to use the "ladysomething" phrase and there were tons of ASOIAF blogs with names like that (ladytyrell, ladylannister, ladystark etc.), but nowadays I don't think many of those are still active, so I often feel like it's a relic from a different time and that not many people even recognize it (since Arryns are not one of the more popular houses anyway).

[cloudbellsv3]

If I were in charge of the MCU, you all would never see Steve with a full beard ever again. I would be crucified for it, but I'd live in comfort knowing I was right.

[imposterogers]

I know it's a very stupid question but how do you deal when you suddenly start losing followers like out of blue? I know it's something very petty that one shouldn't worry about but doesn't it frustrate you at some point that even despite updating your blog on a daily basis you keep on losing followers instead?

see the thing about tumblr is the more you post the more people will unfollow you. it always seems like I gain followers when i'm inactive. I wouldn't let it get to you because a lot of times people follow for One post and don't actually check out your blog/see what you're actually like, so when they see your OTHER posts on their dash and maybe they don't agree / like the content, then they're like oh shit unfollow. people will come and go, and eventually you will who have followers who you know enjoy your blog for your blog and not just a single shitpost or two week phase you went thru

[caelcstis]

nah but kinda thinking about that server where i just make it all for my muses and if u all wanna gab, talk, write w me - and even each other bc ur all so sweet and we're all idiots. idk it sOUNDS ... plausible