#but i’m being positive and i know i’ll be happy in the end regardless of maybe a rushed episode

[barelylivingscholar]

Arlecchino with a daughter tw: unhealthy family relationships, manipulation, and gore(?), suicidal thoughts, unstable/mentally ill daughter. Not for the faint of heart, heavy angst, a somewhat positive ending in the last part(?) (Do not read if uncomfortable)

An: I am backkkkk, second semester and last semester’s finals kept me busyyyyyy but I’m here again to post some stufffffff!! Not hsr related but like I also write for Genshin now, apparently… Will post a part two, I guess? “Father. When am I able to hang around with the others? I have done everything that you’ve asked for.” A young girl asked, to which “Father” responds with, “You need to focus on the task in hand. I still have many more missions for you to do before I set you free.” The girl sighed, knowing very well that she may as well never be able to be allowed to play with the other kids… For a moment, the girl had wished that she wasn’t the only one to deal with this kind of burden. The burden being, the “successor” of “Father.” She wanted to play with the other kids as well, but alas, her father does not permit her to do so. Instead, excuses are made, and the standard Fatui discipline is instilled in her mind, always have to act proper and professional, not allowed to shed a tear, or to feel strong feelings regardless of what the matters are. I hate it here. I do not wish to stay here any longer. Every day feels like I am only made to be the person that “Father” wishes me to be. I am never truly happy. I am sinking. Father was not  family. This whole thing is and always was, a lie. Do I ever get to be free? Perhaps I can set myself free. There is a way.  ̶T̶̶h̶̶e̶ ̶q̶̶u̶̶e̶̶s̶̶t̶̶i̶̶o̶̶n̶ ̶i̶̶s̶, ̶a̶̶m̶ ̶I̶ ̶w̶̶i̶̶l̶̶l̶̶i̶̶n̶̶g̶ ̶t̶̶o̶ ̶d̶̶o̶ ̶i̶̶t̶? --- After burning the corpse of their enemies, I return to the House of the Hearth, albeit bloody and face that is smudged of dirt, the smell of blood and gasoline lingers around me. With every passing servant, caretakers, and also children as well, unsettled and left shaken up at the sight of me. I stained the carpets red. I wonder if “Father” would notice as the carpet is in the same shade of the blood of her enemies…? Will she punish me and discipline me? Although words are exchanged, no form of physical harm done, I am still left isolated.  Like I am to be a monster kept away from people… I feel caged.

This time, I didn’t bother to clean up and went straight ahead to father’s office. Where I know I’ll be punished for such a careless mistake. “Father, I have returned.” I greet, looking to see her eyes staring straight at me. For once I don’t cower. I simply walk up to her and wait for her response. I have no reason to be scared, right? I don’t think I care anymore. Father’s eyes narrowed. The sight of blood that wasn’t mine, the smell of gasoline, in her eyes, I may as well be the filthiest child in the house. One that is simply, uncouth for the position of “successor.” “Why have you not followed protocol? Especially contingency 8? Have I not taught you well?” Her voice sharp, dissatisfied with my performance. It must be a surprise for her that her “successor” had become disobedient. What is she going to do to me, I wonder? Dispose of me? Or would she find someone else who is to succeed her as the “Father” of the House of the Hearth. “I… I have no other excuses.” I was unable to control my voice. It was shaky, wavering. I hate it. Father’s eyes seemed to had harden. I am interested with what is going to be the left of me once this is all over. I look forward to it. I want her to snap at me. Kill me. Foul words for a child like me, but this is what I planned. Maybe it is best that I sleep in eternal slumber instead rather than live a life full of misery. I have nothing to be grateful here. I am not thankful that I am still alive today. “…You are hereby stripped of the title “successor.” You are no longer worthy of the title. I am disappointed.” Is that it? No severe punishments? My mind raced; I was unable to comprehend why had she punished me in a way that is so… Little? Had she gone soft? I do not remember anything that made her want to punish me lightly. Don’t I deserve… More? My brows had furrowed. “Father” did not miss that. “Daughter… Are you, upset?” Her voice sounded confusing, to me. Why do you suddenly care? I don’t understand you at all. I do not feel safe at all. Are you really “family?” “…I’m fine.” I say, my voice a little tight. Unshed tears on my face, I am no fool. I do not need your love.

“You are now excused.” Never had I ever left her office so quickly after that. I had to get away…! I need to get out of here… I breathed heavily as I ran and ran… Until there is nowhere to go. The heavy snow had engulfed me. And soon… I was unconscious. I awoke to an unfamiliar place. This is not the House of the Hearth. I quickly got up, ignoring the sudden rush of blood shooting up due to how fast I went up. I ignore the throbbing pain on my forehead, I focused on my surroundings instead. Where am I? This place is… Different. I jolted as I felt a hand on my shoulder, immediately backing off and grabbing a hidden dagger in my boot. “Stay there! I will stab you!” I hissed. Glaring at the mysterious figure. They looked… Kind. I am not supposed to feel that way. There are no kind people in this world. Everyone I know will always lie to me, manipulate me for their gain. Just like “Father.” Just like them…

The stranger had knelt down and attempted to soothe me. I only responded with aggression and threats. They weren’t phased at all. “Who are you? I am no ordinary orphan! I am a murderer!” I shouted, clearly agitated. The man in a familiar coat had not reacted violently at all. I am confused. And angry. “I am Pantalone. “Regrator” from the Fatui. I assume you are one of the Knave’s lost children…” My eyes widened at the statement. He is no ordinary man… I should’ve known, I gritted my teeth and gripped my dagger tight. “I am not her orphan! I am no longer a part of that… I could care less if you are a part of the Fatui, I will die gladly in vain if I have to fight for my freedom!” I hissed. The man is amused. I can tell by the look in his eyes. “I have a better proposal for you, child.” “Regrator” inquired. I had not chosen to back down even at the prospect of an offer. “What makes you think I will take it?” I replied, gripping the dagger tight. “I will not surrender you to the Knave. Rather, I’ll take you in as my disciple.”

Disciple? Is this man sick in the head? Why would I agree to that? It seems “Regrator” had heard my thoughts, and so, he added, “Although, it is up to you if you would rather be surrendered back to the Knave… Or join me and I’ll give you a much better purpose, in life… Not that you have any choice on the matter if you decline my offer…” I had no sense of purpose to live for. I am merely an empty shell of what I was once. I have nothing to achieve… In the end, I don't have what it takes to truly end my life. So I will follow my new superior. “Fine. But don’t expect me to be easily obedient. I am rather mad.” And it was the start of something anew…  I had become, “Regrator’s disciple.” I wonder how “Knave” will react to such arrangements… An: Part two will include Lyney, Lynette, and Freminet. There will be other characters who will be included as well but, part one's story was set before Lyney became the sucessor of the House of the Hearth. I am thinking of interesting ideas to write for this story and some alternate routes as well... We'll see once I whip up part two.

[misssmeat]

30 Things I Learned Before Turning 30

In celebration of my next decade, I took some time to document some of the obvious and not-so-obvious pieces of wisdom I've collected in my life. I wrote this as an exercise to celebrate my own growth, but I thought I would share it.

I spent over half of my 20s with all of you, here on tumblr. It was a messy decade spent figuring out who I am, what I want, and how to create the life I dream of. I'm ending my 20s happier, more sure of myself, and excited for the future. Thanks for joining me on the journey.

Here's to the next decade of being older. Wiser. Sexier. Here's to 30.

Love and Relationships

Give it three dates if you’re on the fence about someone. Love at first sight (or first date) is rare.

If he’s significantly older and makes you feel special for being “mature for your age”… there is something very wrong. He’s gross, and I promise you’ll see it one day and be furious for your past self.

Co-dependency is not love. 

Your partner is not your therapist. Do not treat them as such. 

Holding hands is a superior form of intimacy. 

Sometimes love isn’t enough. 

As annoying and cliche as it is, self-love is the most important love you’ll discover. 

Be intentional in your relationships - intentionally make time, intentionally show care, intentionally respect your partner, intentionally adore. (This applies to friendships too.)

Strong relationships are built on strong foundations. Communication, trust, kindness.

Life is made of millions of tiny moments. The tiny moments make the difference more than the grand gestures. 

Sex and Kink

Sex is supposed to be fun. Too many people forget this. It’s adult playtime. Don’t take yourself too seriously. 

Your limits are sacred. Never let anyone convince you otherwise. 

There is no such thing as a “true” sub/Dom/etc. Do what makes you happy. It’s really that simple. 

Confidence is 75% of success in the bedroom. I never truly know what I’m doing, but if I act like I’m the hottest girl on earth… my partner goes nuts for me regardless.

Keep water near at all times.  

Bondage is much more physically taxing than you might imagine. A rope buddy taught me to keep chocolate near for the sugar boost after physically taxing positions. 

Sometimes things get messy. Don’t worry, it’s normal. 

Give feedback and be open to feedback. We are all different, so there should be a learning curve with each partner.

Butt stuff hurts a lot less if you train your muscles slowly over time. 

If you’re not in the mood, don’t feel pressure to force it. Respect what your body is telling you. Likewise, respect your partner if they aren’t in the mood. 

Everything Else 

Ladies - unlearn creating yourself for the male gaze. It’s overrated.

Western cooking isn’t always superior. See the fried egg in France vs. Hong Kong. I’ll die on this hill.

Your worth and value are not tied to anything you’re offering or producing. Existing is the most radical thing we can do. 

Find a hobby that doesn’t require the internet. I found painting and reading. 

Your energy is valuable. Be selective in where and how you invest it.

When washing your hair, go through your shampoo routine twice before conditioning.

Go on walks. Touch grass. Feel the sun on your skin.

When in doubt, adopt a cat. 

Go to therapy. No matter where you are on your mental health journey, therapy will probably be a game changer.

Do not underestimate the power of forgiveness. Holding onto anger is not as empowering as I once believed it was.

And one last bonus thought: no matter what, always make space for joy.

❤️.

[chvnnie]

thoughts on chan being a switch? it's rotting me i swear. i can so imagine him being tied up just itching to touch the reader, holding back the urge to completely tear them apart. pls omg he drives me crazy

switch Chan does not get the attention he deserves. because honestly, it’s a mind shattering thought.

SMUT - MINORS DNI

He never considered subbing. Being submissive just isn’t something that interested him; the control he has over every aspect of his life is something he holds so dearly. Just the thought of letting it go makes the man nervous, skin itchy, chest tight.

But you. You made him see the beauty in release, with a comfort that smells like lavender and cotton, tastes like oranges, feels like heaven.

You make it easy to relax.

Lifted on your knees, you straddled Chan, who is secured to your bed with the softest ropes he’s ever felt. Though he’s tugged once or twice, they’re firm. No slack, keeping him exactly where you want him.

Your body is hovering, center above center yet not touching even in the slightest. Fully dressed in contrast to him, cock heavy on his abs. Goosebumps crawling up his skin from the chill of the room, from the excitement bubbling in his belly.

Humming, you run the tip of a cane down his chest. Tracing the ridges of his body with it. It’s only been used once or twice, yet the tiny sparks of terror are felt in his spine. Remembering how it felt, the uniform marks it made — “How are you feeling, Channie?”

He takes a shaky breath before smiling, the cane now close to his leaning tip. “Good, ma’am.”

The title makes your lips quirk up, pretty eyes roaming up to his. “I’m glad.” Your tone reflect it. “What have you done while I was gone?”

“Followed your rules.”

He says it so simply that you look unconvinced. “Sounds like you’re saying that because I want to hear it.” A light swat to his inner thigh — not enough to hurt him, but it does make him twitch in the bindings. “Are you being honest?”

“Always, ma’am.”

You decide to take him at his word. After all, Channie can be such a good boy.

When he wants to be.

“I’m glad you came over.” You say earnestly, placing the cane to the side. “It’s been too long since I got to play with my favorite toy.”

Though you make him feel safe, content in a submissive role, the demeaning nickname sparks annoyance in the back of his head. That’s what he calls you when the roles are switched, twisted into positions that are simply for his pleasure. Chan doesn’t care for how you’ve used it against him.

“I wanted to see you.” He says, trying to ignore the feeling. “Touch you. Taste you—“

“Who said anything about that?” The laugh you give is humiliating, as if it was insane of him to even think about having you like that. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, little boy.”

It’s fun when Chan subs. When he lets you do whatever you want with him, regardless of the twisted things you come up with.

But, it’s even more fun when you challenge him. As his smile falls, yours grows, happy to see him getting so pent up. Knowing that he holds no control, it’s starting to make him itch.

“Why else would you invite me over?” He can’t help the bite in his voice.

Oh, your giggle. Usually the happiest, prettiest sound. One he could listen to for hours on end.

Today, it makes his hands curl into fists.

“To stare at you.” You’re climbing off of him. “Admire you. Sometimes it’s nice just to…look.”

He doesn’t like the way you said that. You pick up your phone, thumbs tapping quickly. Drowning out the man currently at your disposal. Within moments, there’s a knock on your apartment door.

“Oh, I’ll be right back.” You singsong, a little bounce in your step as you head out the room. Before he can even ask, you punch his cheeks between your thumb and index finger. “You’re going to love this, Channie.”

Kiss, and gone. The voices. Soft, whispering so they’re inaudible. Your giggle, the stranger responding in a deep, familiar voice.

No. No, no, no—

The set up of the room suddenly makes sense. The fluffy armchair, usually tucked in the corner. Right at the edge of the bed, positioned perfectly for Chan to see. The way you seem more focused on your phone than usual.

He’s thrashing in the bindings by the time Felix walks in with you, the younger man not even slightly surprised by his predicament.

“Oh, hyung. Excited?” The snide remark makes you laugh, guiding Felix over to the chair.

“He’s always eager—“

“Fucking untie me-“

“And so hard to satisfy.” You say with a sigh, plopping to a seat. “I’m sure you understand. It’s never enough for him.”

Felix hums sadly, giving his friend an almost disappointing look. “How do you ever get any pleasure?”

You smile, twirling your hair with your index finger. “He does have a pretty cock, but you think with how much he fucking talks, he would use his tongue a bit more.”

Chan is livid. It’s all a lie; how many hours has he spent between your legs? Have you spent seated on his face? Sure, he knows it’s all to rile him up. But the frustration comes from the fact that it’s working. He wants to touch you. Needs to touch you. To fucking remind you who exactly is in charge—

“Oh, poor thing.” Felix coos, softly tracing your jaw with the tips of his fingers as he kneels in front of you. “Do you want some help?”

Fuck, he’s so annoyed with the way you pout. Puppy dog eyes. “Please, Lixie?”

It’s agony, watching his younger friend push your skirt up. Seeing that you were wearing nothing the underneath the entire time, head rolling back as Felix eagerly traces your cunt with his tongue. That should be him. He should be touching you.

Yet he’s bound. Stagnant. Forced to watch as the ropes begin to give under his pulls.

[bookish-whore]

Falling Part V

Azriel x Reader

Words: 4.3k

Warnings: slight self-destructive behavior, angst, Azriel being a dumb male

A/N: Not gonna lie guys when I initially wrote this chapter, I had the worst writers block and I ended up deleting it all last night and starting it over (which produced this) but I am so excited with where its headed. This chapter is somewhat filler content, but I promise I am putting some things into motion for later! I know I write this literally every fic, but I appreciate you all so much for loving this story and I am so overwhelmed with the support it has gotten. My requests are open so feel free to send all the asks <3

Also, I am almost at 400 followers WHAT?! And I think I’ll do a little personal Q&A or something so you guys can get to know me a little bit <3 I’ll update you in a post soon!

Previous parts here -> Part I, Part II, Part III, Part IV

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Last night seemed like a dream.

I woke up to bright light streaming through my window, my indication that the sun was already high in the sky. I guess I had slept far longer than I meant to. I stretch out my limbs, the events of last night returning to my memory as I looked at my night table where I had conveniently placed Iremia. I remembered then that it was real. Azriel and Elain were engaged. Engaged. I bring my hands to rub the sleep from my eyes, dragging them down my face and letting out a sigh. I could stay in bed all day and wallow in self-pity, but I decided that I wouldn’t continue to let them have so much control over my life, I would continue to heed Nesta and Lucien’s advice. With that decided, I take a quick bath and get dressed before heading to the dining room to find something to eat.

I entered the room surprised to find Nesta sitting in her usual position, Cassian next to her holding her hand and rubbing gentle circles along the back of it while they spoke.

“Good morning” I announce as I take my seat across from them

“Morning y/n” Cassian says while piling more food onto his plate

“So?” Nesta asked as I piled eggs, bacon, and bread with jam on my plate.

“So?” I repeat back to her, I know that she wants details about last night but I’m going to at least make her be direct about it.

“How did it go?” She clarifies, at this Cassian looks between the two of us clearly also wanting to hear the details.

“I couldn’t do it Nes, not after the announcement” she rolled her eyes but let me continue “It’s just the timing didn’t seem right, and I know I know you’re going to say the timing will never be right, but Nes you didn’t see him. He looked so happy, so carefree, and the last thing I wanted to do was ruin it by dropping this bombshell on him.”

“Look y/n, I love you and I will support you with whatever you decide to do.”

“I feel like a -but- is coming” I interject

“but-” she continues with one of her signature looks. “Don’t you think it would be worse to wait? That it will only be a bigger deal if they actually go through with getting married? Maybe it would hurt everyone involved less if you told them before planning and preparations are made? I mean he deserves to make an informed decision about what to do about the bond”

“I don’t know Nes.” I look to Cassian who is silently eating his breakfast “wait a second- what do you mean actually go through with getting married? Do you think they won’t go through with it?”

“All I know is that Feyre and Rhys are preparing for the worst-case scenario. I mean she is a mated female and if Lucien wanted to, he could invoke a blood duel as per Autumn Court tradition. Not to mention tension among the courts is still fragile after the treaty business last year.”

“Lucien wouldn’t do that; he doesn’t see mated females as his property in that way.” I said “Also, he isn’t technically an Autumn Court male anymore. He is the high lord apparent of the Day Court.”

“Regardless of his court standing, he is still her mate. He also has the strongest of relationships with the human realm and I don’t know if Rhys and Feyre are prepared to lose an asset like him due to Elain’s need to rebel.” She said matter of factly.

“What do you think Cass?” I asked the male.

He went still a moment, his brows furrowing as though he was debating what exactly to say in this situation. “I think that Nes has a point, I mean the longer you wait the more people may get hurt by the news and I think that he deserves to know; he has been infatuated with the idea of mates since we were younger and I don’t know what changed his mind, but I think he is just looking for commitment and Elain is looking to rebel, and they just found each other. I also stand by my previous statement during training, I love him dearly, he is my brother, but gods damn is he an idiot sometimes.”

I can’t help but laugh at his statement. “I’ll consider it” I look between the two of them “I promise I will think about it, and I’ll talk to Rhys and Feyre to see what they think.”

The couple nodded as we continued with breakfast. We switched the conversation to training and general news. Once we had finished, we went our separate ways. I thought a lot about what they had said and sent a note to find the high lord and lady and ask for their advice with this whole thing. I immediately got a response that appeared in Rhysand’s elegant script offering to winnow me to the River House this afternoon to meet them in his office. I immediately accepted sending the magical paper back to its sender and decided to indulge myself in a book until the meeting time.

--------------------------------------------------

I hadn’t realized how many hours had passed until the high lord materialized in the library. I put my book on a nearby table and offered a simple greeting. Rhys held out his arm which I took without hesitation, the familiar pulling sensation taking over as we winnowed directly to the high lord’s office. When we arrived, I turned to find Feyre entering the room with Nyx. The little prince reaching his arms out. I hadn’t noticed before, but his wings were getting stronger, and he was gaining some control over them as he flapped them in an attempt to launch himself into his father’s waiting arms.

“Hey y/n” the high lady said handing Nyx to her mate who beamed at the boy now securely in his embrace.

“So, to what do we owe the pleasure” Rhysand asked, Feyre simply nodded in agreement.

“Well, you know that I love you both, and that I value your opinion.” The two nodded listening intently “After Solstice, after the engagement, I think I am just looking for some advice about what to do about Azriel. You know whether I should still tell him about the bond or just leave it alone. I talked to Cassian and Nesta earlier and now I’m asking you what you think.”

The two look at each other, silently communicating as they tended to do. Feyre was the one to speak “You know I love my family; I love both of my sisters but there are just so many logistics involved with this whole union. I mean you are Azriel’s mate whether you tell him and whether or not he accepts it and the same goes for Elain, she is welcome to reject the bond with Lucien but to me it seems like she is just running away from the idea altogether.” She took a breath “and Lucien, I mean he is not only my friend but also an ally of this court and he has every right to invoke the blood duel should he want to. its just spiraled, the whole thing from a harmless flirtation to a disaster.” She looked at her mate who gave her a nod of approval.

“Look you two, I don’t know where this idea came from that Lucien is going to challenge Az but he isn’t an Autumn Court male anymore and finds the blood duel repulsive and when has he given any indication that he would do something like that. When he got to the night court, he let Elain have her space and he hasn’t pushed the bond on her. He’s never tried to force anything on her, and he wouldn’t now just because they are engaged.”

“You have a valid point” Feyre said “But the whole reason you came here was to ask our opinion on your situation. I think both Rhys and I agree that you should still tell him. I mean had he not proposed, you would have told him at the solstice party. We think that he deserves to have all the information before he makes a big decision like this, like marriage.”

I nod my head as she speaks, her words echoing that of Cassian and Nesta’s from this morning. “I guess I have a lot to think about”

“Look, no matter what happens just know we are here for you to help you through this” Rhysand says breaking his silence.

“I’m scared” I admit to them

“Well look at it this way” Feyre begins “at least you will be the one to tell him and not a Suriel” she gives Rhys a mischievous look as he grins

“I was going to tell you…eventually” he said “The Suriel just got to you first AND I was gravely injured if you recall”

Feyre let out a laugh, pressing a kiss to his lips and to Nyx’s forehead. “I think it is all going to work out y/n”

I let out a long breath “Okay, well now that that is settled, hand me that baby because I need time with my nephew”

Rhys grins handing Nyx to me, I bounce the babe on my knees and enjoy some family time with the three of them for the remainder of the night.

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It had been a month since my conversations with Nesta and Feyre about what to do and I was still no closer to a decision. I had even gone as far as making pro and con lists which were scattered across my desk with various reasons why I should tell him, and why I shouldn’t. Reason number one being that they seemed so happy. Just yesterday they had announced that they intended to marry a week after Starfall, which was only a few months away.

I continued thinking about my reasons as I got ready for the day. I was going to be helping Gwyn with research in the library today. I had to admit I was excited to spend the day surrounded by books and to be around Gwyn, I had been so busy with the new developments with Azriel that I had neglected time with my friend, and I intended to make up for it.

I was putting on my shoes in a chair in the corner of my bedroom when I heard a rustling on my desk. I looked over as a letter appeared on top of a pile of other correspondence, my name scrawled across the front with handwriting I immediately recognized. I jumped up from my position taking the letter in my hands as I tore open the envelope and couldn’t help the smile on my face as I read it.

My Dearest Y/N,

I hope you are doing well. I have found myself missing your company in the past weeks since my relocation to my father’s court. I have been keeping busy, learning the history of the court, and enjoying the vast library, it really is unmatched. I think you would love it. No, I know you would love it here. Anyways, what updates do you have from the Night Court? I take it everyone is well. I’m sure it has been hard on you these weeks since the engagement and I want to remind you that you have a friend, a friend who happens to know exactly what you’re going through and one that has come to care greatly for you. please remember that you always have a place in my court should you need to escape.

Yours,

Lucien

I made myself a mental note to send a response as I checked the time realizing I was late and made my way downstairs to the library.

I was immediately greeted by Gwyn, the red head smiling at me in one of her big genuine smiles, her eyes sparkling with the gesture, and she pulled me into a tight hug. “Oh, I have missed you so much y/n” she says

“I missed you too Gwyn”

“Okay you have so much to catch me up on” she says practically bouncing with excitement over our girl talk today which we did between tasks for Clotho and finding some research for another priestess Gwyn is helping. I told her everything, I needed another opinion about what to do from someone not currently in a mating bond. Someone who might understand my reservations a little better.

“How do you feel about it all?” she asks as we work on reshelving books in the lower levels.

“I feel…” I take a breath “I don’t know I guess I feel conflicted, on one hand I want him to know maybe for my own benefit, but I mean is it fair of me to just make this choice for him? What if he feels like Elain? Like the bond is a burden he wants to run from? I don’t know if I can deal with that kind of rejection. On the other hand, I don’t tell him and continue my life like it is now and let him continue his life that he chose with Elain but what if one day it snaps for him and he wants to explore it, but they have a life, maybe a family? I am just confused and scared, and I don’t know what to do. The consensus has been that I need to tell him and that’s what I am leaning towards, but I just don’t know Gwyn.”

“I think that the only person who can decide what to do is you.” the priestess says “I mean you get all this advice about what’s fair for him. But what is fair to you?”

I was pondering over her words when suddenly a note materialized on the cart. I recognized the script immediately and for a moment I forgot how to breathe.

Meet me on the roof

-Az

“What do you think he wants?” I ask

“Only one way to find out” she says “I think you should figure out what you want y/n, I think you two should figure out if you’re even compatible before you decide. Maybe spend time with him without the influence of other people, just you two to see how you interact. Maybe it’ll help you to make your decision. Remember that mating bonds were initially put in place by the mother for prime breeding benefits, we live in a modern world and maybe it’s an antiquated concept now”

“Thanks Gwyn” I said pulling the female into another hug “I guess I have somewhere to be”

“Good luck” she says disappearing behind a bookshelf, continuing with her work. I take a deep breath and make my way upstairs.

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I couldn’t help the thoughts running through my head as I made my way up to the roof, the most dominant one being what If he knows. I try to not look concerned as I open the door, the sunlight catching me off guard for a moment as I make out his figure in our usual spot, sitting on the edge of the roof with his legs dangling over the side. His wings looking powerful and poised behind him.

His shadows immediately slither over to greet me, as they do, he turns from his position to look at me approaching. “Hey y/n” he says patting the empty space next to him.

I carefully set myself down beside him, hoping he can’t hear how loud my heart is beating. After a moment of silence, I manage to say “So, why did you ask me here?”

“To be honest…I’m not really sure” He says “I feel like you are one of the only people I can really talk to you know. The others, I love them, and they are my family, but I know they don’t approve of me right now.”

“Don’t approve of you why?”

“I know they have reservations about me and Elain. I mean months ago Rhys cornered me in his office and basically told me to stay away from her, and now we’re engaged. I know he and Feyre are probably figuring out the logistics of it all, you know because she is mated to Lucien.”

“I may have heard something like that from them.” I say “Can I just ask you why, if you know how your family feels and you have these reservations then why go through it”

“I think I’m in love with her”

“This seems like a lot of trouble for you think, I mean if you are going to vow to spend your life with someone shouldn’t you know you love them?” I asked him.

“I think that conversation we had a few weeks ago has really stuck with me, you know about mates. I can’t help but feel nostalgic. I spent hundreds of years certain I would find my mate and then I gave up on it and decided to try things with Elain and maybe I feel guilty. Because if I were in Lucien’s position, I would hate the male and I would be in absolute hell watching my mate fall in love with and intend to marry someone else.”

“I know Lucien doesn’t hate you, he may dislike you because of his instincts but he trusts Elain to make her own decisions. He would never force her to accept the bond or choose him unless it is what she truly wanted.”

“You talk with Lucien?” he asks, looking over at me, his eyes meeting mine.

“Of course, I mean we’re friends and have been for some time now”

“I guess I didn’t notice”

“There are a lot of things you don’t notice” I say quietly under my breath.

“What was that?” he asks

“Oh nothing” I reply, “but Az if you feel guilty you can pull out you know. You don’t have to go through with any of this if you feel that way.”

“I know, its just” he pauses taking a deep breath “I don’t think anyone else would love me, maybe this is it. Maybe this is my one chance at some kind of happiness”

“I don’t think the universe works that way Az” he looks at me “Besides there are plenty of people who love you, myself included”

“I know that y/n, I just feel like I’m making a huge mistake, every instinct is screaming that this is wrong, and I can’t shake it.”

“I should give you Iremia, seems like you could use the tranquility” I say jokingly

“That’s what you named it? The dagger?” he asked

I nod my head in confirmation “Yeah, I figured I could use a little calm in my life so why not”

“It’s a great name” he says.

“Look Az, maybe you should call off the wedding if you are having these doubts. No one would blame you for taking the time to think about it, this is the rest of your life you are talking about, and you should be sure you want to spend it with Elain. Especially if you’re having such strong doubts.”

“I just don’t want to hurt anyone” he says softly

“I know the feeling” I say bringing my eyes down to look at my hands.

“Y/n?” he says my name softly, almost a whisper and I turn my head to face him. He is looking at me and his eyes met mine, and I noticed them drift lower before his gaze is resting on my lips. My breath became caught in my throat. Was he going to kiss me? I thought as his mouth parted slightly, his breath becoming uneven as he began to lean into me.

“Az?” A soft voice said interrupting the moment.

“Elain” he said quickly, practically jumping away from me and making his way over to her placing a kiss to her temple “What are you doing up here?” he asked her.

“We have dinner plans…remember?” she replied, “I figured I would save you a trip by coming here.” She looked over at me, I was rising from the mat “Hello y/n” she said politely

I immediately felt embarrassed and fought the redness rising on my face as I gave her a nonchalant greeting back.

“Thanks for the talk y/n” Azriel says “I’ll see you in training tomorrow”

I give them both a small smile as they depart his shadows swirling as he winnows them away. The conversation runs over again in my head. Did he suspect something? Was he going to kiss me? Would I have let him?

I make my way downstairs to my room to change before dinner with the Inner Circle, minus Elain and Azriel who apparently had other plans for the evening. My thoughts no clearer than they were this morning.

--------------------------------------------------

Once bathed and changed I made it to the dining room to find it already full of people. Nesta and Cass were in their usual seats as were Feyre, Rhys, Nyx, Mor, and even Amren to my surprise. I took up my seat across from Nesta and began to fill my plate.

The conversation was normal, mostly updates about Nyx and about the Valkyries training about new developments in the Hewn city and general news. Until Feyre cleared her throat drawing my attention. “So, y/n, what is new on the Azriel front?” she tried to sound nonchalant about it, but the air was thick with tension.

“Here we go” I said rolling my eyes as I prepared for the same speech I had gotten for weeks from them about how I needed to do the right thing and tell him and basically just get it over with.

“Clearly you have all made your opinions on the matter known. So why don’t you all just tell me what to do.” I look around the room meeting their gaze, my tone elevating as I continued “If anyone has an idea of how I should better deal with this please let me know because I feel like I am losing my mind.” My voice breaks but I take a deep breath and continue. “I know what you all think about it, but it isn’t your decision to make. If and when I tell him about this it will be on MY terms.”

“We just want to help you” Feyre says softly.

“As if any of you can help me, as if any of you can fathom what it’s like. Except you Rhys, but only briefly because it worked out in your favor. What would you all suggest I do hmm? Oh, wait you have all already told me what you think. Why do I need to rush and make a decision like this just because you all have an opinion about it?”

“y/n-” Nesta begins, but I cut her off.

“Because on one hand, I tell him about the bond and ruin any chance of happiness he has built for himself. On the other I don’t say a word, and one day the bond may snap for him, and he resents me for not telling him. Oh, and not to mention the other important piece here, Elain. You all would have me be the villain that steps in to ruin her wedding, to ruin a choice she made, a choice they both made. I can’t do that. No, actually I won’t do that.”

“But y/n-” Cassian began

“There is no but, that is all there is to it Cass. Either way I lose” the others look down at their hands, mulling over what I said.

“I’m going to bed” I announce, getting up from the table and making my way to my bedroom. I hear their hushed voices arguing as I make my way up the stairs, I do my best to block it out.

Once making it to my room, I close the door softly behind me and make my way to my desk. I take deep steadying breaths trying to ignore the feeling of being suffocated, of being forced into something so serious. I turn my head and catch a glimpse of Lucien’s last letter. I look it over again, suddenly getting an idea.

I grab a piece of parchment, and a pen and scrawl out a quick reply before losing my nerve.

Dearest Lucien,

I am doubtful of my ability to remain here surrounded by happy mated couples. Watching Elain and Azriel plan their wedding is torture. Getting advice from people who know nothing of what I am going through is torture and to be honest I miss you more than I can express. So, how soon can I visit? I feel that some time away would do me good. I need to figure out what my life is without him, who I am without him. Perhaps you can help with that.

Yours,

Y/N

Next Chapter ->

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[daisyblog]

Kiss and Make Up

Our Story Masterlist Summary: Harry and YN have their first argument. Warning: swearing

YN’s POV: The Take Me Home tour was well underway, I felt so lucky to be able to join the boys on the tour being Louise’s assistant. I’d learnt so much already and it had only just begun. Tonight the boys are playing at LG Arena in Birmingham, they had just finished rehearsing ahead of the evening show so were now free to do as they pleased. In the boy's shared dressing room, Niall was sitting on the arm of the large sofa, that Liam was laying across, strumming random tunes on his guitar and Louis and Zayn were yet to appear. Harry’s arm was draped over my shoulder as we sat as one on the opposite sofa to the two boys. I was scrolling through my Instagram and Twitter as the boys chatted about the tour so far, how they were excited to play in their hometown and just overall how happy they are.

“So..Liam are your Mum and Dad comin’ tonight ‘en..because Birmingham is close to them isn’t it?” Niall asked as he continued to strum his guitar. “Uh yeah they are actually..I dunno if my sisters are though” Liam explained from his position on the sofa “Do I need to warn them about your thing for the boy's sisters Harry?” Liam teased.

I felt Harry chuckle next to me, and the next thing said made my chest tight and my stomach twist “Yeah..once I get bored with YN, I’ll charm yours and win them over”. The three boys laughed but Harry’s arm around you suddenly felt heavy on your shoulder. Was that all I was to him, someone to use until he found better? I couldn’t stay in this room any longer, I needed to get out. I could take a joke, heck I loved the jokes and pranks the boys would pull but this wasn’t funny. I got up without saying a word and stomped towards the door “Where you going?” Harry asked, completely oblivious to what his words had done. I ignored him, not wanting to talk right now and continued to walk out the door and down the corridor heading towards the bathroom at the end of it. The tears were going to spill any second, I felt them in the corners of my eyes making my vision blurry.

“Aww there she is..you alright Tiny?” my brother’s voice startled me. The minute Louis saw the tears streaming down my face, he panicked and pulled me into his chest “What’s wrong? What’s ‘appened?”. “H-h-harry..” I sobbed into his chest, I didn’t get the chance to finish explaining what had happened because Louis left me to go and headed towards the dressing room. I was going to tell him not to but there was no point, once Louis had something in his head he was going to do it regardless. I just carried on heading towards the bathroom to avoid what was about to happen.

Harry’s POV:

YN had just walked out of the dressing room door without answering me when I asked where she was going. “What’s wrong with her?” Liam asked no one in particular. “You know what girls can be like…fine one minute and in a mood the next..hormones or some shit” Niall spoke “Are you gonna go after her?”

“No, she’ll be fine..probably gone to phone her Mum or something” I said “I know she’s been missing her a lot since the tour started” The door flies open and almost hits the wall behind it, and Louis appears. “What the fook ‘ave you done to my sister?” Louis raised his voice at me. At this, the two boys looked at me and matched the same confused look that I had. “Mate..nothi-“ Liam began. “I’m not askin’ you Payno..I’m talkin’ to Harry” “Lou..I-I..I don’t know what you're talking about..she just walked out without saying anything” “Well why the hell was she just sobbing in my arms and all I got out of her was your name?” Louis spoke “Do me a favour..go and find her and sort it out..will ya? ‘cause if you don’t I’m gonna punch you this time” Niall and Liam adverting their eyes back and forth at the seen in front of them.

I got up from the sofa without saying another word and headed towards the door. I didn’t understand what had happened, and how things can change so quickly. One minute we were cuddling on the sofa and now she’s crying because of me. It almost felt impossible to find her in this building, I’d looked in every room almost and no sign of her anywhere. I’d asked Louise if she had seen her and all I got was ‘thought she was with you’, I’d asked the 5SOS boys, who were our opening act, but still no luck. The crew members who were sitting having some lunch in the kitchen hadn’t seen her either. I almost gave up looking until I passed Paul in the corridor, and he told me he saw her going into the small room at the bottom near the toilets. As I approached the room, I took a deep breath before pushing the door open. As I walked in and let the door close behind me, I noticed she was sitting on the red sofa with her knees tucked up in her chest and wiping her eyes with the sleeves of her jumper. The scene broke my heart. My legs took me over to her “Baby..what..why are you crying?”. “Just leave me alone” she mumbled. “No..no..I’m not going anywhere until we talk about this”, I went to wipe a tear that was rolling down her cheek but she swatted my hand away. “YN..Baby please” “Just fook off…you’d rather be with someone else anyway” she spat out. “What are you talking about?” “Once I get bored with YN, I’ll charm yours and win them over..I think that’s what you said” she repeated my words from earlier. “Aww c’mon…that was a joke and you know it” I defended my words. “No..jokes are funny…that was just arrogant” “You’re just being sensitive now” I snapped at her. “YOU JUST DON’T GET IT” she shouted “Nobody ever gets it” she whispered the last part. “THEN FUCKING TELL ME YN…'CAUSE I DON”T COME WITH A CRYSTAL BALL TO KNOW WHAT YOU’RE THINKING..FOR FUCKS SAKE” after raising my voice, I regretted it instantly “I’m sorry..I didn’t mean to shout” She was silent for a few moments until I heard her voice “Do you know how many comments I read every day telling me I’m ugly and fat..o-or how you could do so much better than me…thousands…and when you said that you would move onto someone else once you get bored of me..It made me think maybe they’re right..why would Harry Styles want to be with me, when he could have anyone he wanted” “I don’t want anyone other than you” I spoke “and if I can’t have you then..I don’t see the point” I spoke gently. She sniffed and wiped a stray tear that rolled down her cheek and hit her lip “It really hurt me what you said” “I know..and I’m really sorry baby” I held my arms open for her, and she slowly moved so her head lay on my chest. I kissed the top of her head and moved my fingers up and down her arm in a calming motion. After a few moments, I decided to speak “Baby?”, she lifted her head to look up at me “You’re beautiful…please don’t listen to those comments…they’re just people who don’t have anything better to do than tear people apart”, I dipped my head to meet her lips and moved mine with hers softly. I brought my hand up to the side of her face as the kiss deepened and became a little sloppier. As I was about to move for her to fall on top of me, the door abruptly opened. “Ahh fook...me eyes” Louis's dramatic voice startled us “Right..well I’m glad you’ve made up…but maybe keep the kissing part until later yeah…right well..umm…I’ll leave you to it” and walked back out, closing the door behind him. As I looked back at YN we burst into laughter at what just happened. “I love you” I confessed, leaving a peck on her lips “I love you” she mumbled against my lips.

Tag List: (let me know if you would like to be added) @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @harrys-flower

[chrisevansonly]

I'm Not Meant for This

Chris Evans x Girlfriend Reader

Summary: You weren’t meant for this life, the cameras, the gossip, the fan pages, it wasn’t you, letting yourself suffer wasn’t worth it anymore…was there anyway that would change?

Warnings: angst, minor arguing, crying, reader mentioning insecurities, happy ending<3

A/N: This was a request sent in by an anon! Thank you in advance for this, I’m a big lover of happy endings and I did tweak the request a little bit so I hope that’s okay!!I feel so unmotivated but I’m trying to update regardless lol

Word Count: 843

Spending a lot of time watching your life go by from outside your body looking down on yourself is a feeling so hard to describe, surrounding by celebrities of all calibres and standing, next to Chris you felt like you weren’t supposed to be here. You’d been feeling pretty low the past few months, Chris’s career doing really well, he just finished filming his last few movies for 2022 and 2023, and instead of talking about taking a break, he wanted to keep going. In retrospect, talking to Chris about your feelings should have been number one on the list of conversations you wanted to have, but maybe leaving and letting him down gently was better. Watching him talk freely in the sea of people, or handle the cameras like champ, all it did for you was made you feel out of place and disgusted by yourself. You knew this wasn’t his fault, you could only blame yourself for the position you were in, but you couldn’t take it anymore. 

-

The minute the two of you got home, you ditched your heels at the front door, leaving Chris standing there to go upstairs and into the bathroom. Looking at yourself in the mirror only made it worse, the bags and dark circles under your eyes despite the full coverage foundation and concealer covering it. Taking a wipe you cleaned your face off, letting out a quiet sigh, your eyes closing for a few seconds, and when you opened them, Chris was looking at you, an unreadable expression on his face 

“You’ve been really quiet all night…what’s going on?”

This was your chance, let him down easy, spend one last night with him and leave tomorrow, move far away, start over, leave Chris in the past

“I can’t do this anymore.”

“Do what baby?” 

You turned and motioned between the two of you 

“This, us, I can’t do it anymore, I’m not meant for this life Chris, I can’t fucking do this.”

You moved past him, ducking away into the closet to get out of the floor length black dress you had on, changing into a pair of cotton shorts and an oversized t-shirt

“Wait a minute, Y/N…we’re going to talk about this”

“I don’t want too anymore! I’m tired of constantly being attacked online, photographed without my consent, being the odd one out at every event, people I don’t even know nitpicking my appearance! I’m done!”

Chris ran a hand down his face 

“You know that’s not my fault, right?”

“Jesus Chris, that’s what you have to say?! I’m going to pack my stuff.”

His hand grasped yours tightly and he pulled you back to him softly, but firm enough for you to land against his chest, his arms holding you to him

“No. No. I can’t lose you, not now, not ever, we can figure a way to fix this problem.”

You shook your head, tears now falling down your cheeks

“No, we can’t, there’s n-”

“Yes, there is. Screw going back to work, i’ll take time off, as much as we need, I should have made that decision last year, but I didn’t and now I am. We can go away, stay at the cabin for a few months just me and you, restart your social media’s, hire more security, hell we can order our fucking groceries, that exists now!”

You laughed quietly into the flannel he had on, and Chris spoke again, beating you to it

“You are everything to me, you are my world, my light, and I wished you would have told me about this sooner so I could have helped you…I’m so sorry I didn’t notice how much this was hurting you, how much I was hurting you. You are the most beautiful girl in the world to me, and I swear to you I’ll fix this, we can make this work…”

Staying silent, eventually hugging him back tighter you closed your eyes before making a decision you hoped you wouldn’t regret

“Okay.”

Hearing your voice, Chris pulled back and brought his hands up to cup your face, swiping a few tears away before connecting his lips with yours, kissing you tenderly before pulling away and frowning when he noticed just how drained you looked 

“I love you so much angel, I’m going to make this right, and I’m going to work my hardest to keep you safe and happy, I promise I won’t let this happen again…”

A small part of you was worried you made the wrong decision but looking into Chris’s eyes and seeing just how much he love and appreciated you, was enough to help your heart prove you were doing the right thing. In the end you knew Chris would go to the ends of the earth for you, and he was willing to do that now, to protect you, and to give you the life he knows you deserve. The road would be long, but as long as you had Chris, he could make the journey a little more bearable. 

[mounts89]

Second Date

Hi everyone, I love reading Mason fanfics here so I figured I’d try to write my own… Please let me know what you think. 🥺

Word count: 1.4k. Just fluff?

“I thought I’d never see you again” you heard as someone had positioned themselves directly beside you at the bar.

“Hey stranger” you smiled, without even looking at him, yet being able to recognize him by his voice immediately.

It had been about three weeks since you’d last seen him, since you’d gone on your first date with Mason.

“Well,” he began whispering in your ear as he had move dangerously close to you, “wouldn’t be much of a stranger if you finally agreed on a day for our second date.”

The truth was, you wanted to say yes to his relentless texts asking you out on a second date. But his life seemed to be so chaotic, and you weren’t exactly ready to bring him into yours. Between uni, work, and the Chelsea internship, you knew it was no use to try to fit someone into your schedule. At least, that’s what you told yourself.

“I know, I know, I told you I’ve been busy...” you apologized.

“I know, but regardless I’m very happy I’ve seen you again. You look just absolutely gorgeous.”

You turned to look at him for the first time that night, admiring the way he looked under the lights. His hair was more grown out and his beard was messier than the last time you saw him. And his smile. That damn smile that reached his eyes. You knew that if you spent long enough with him, and if you saw that smile long enough, you’d end up caving in and doing anything he’d ask from you.

“Thank you Mase, you look good too.” you smiled at him.

“Two gin and tonics please, my tab” he turned towards the bartender before resuming his conversation with you.

“So I must ask, Y/N. What brings you in here. You’ve been too busy to go out with me but you seem to have time to go out to the clubs in this little black dress.” he said half-jokingly, although you could sense a tone of hurt in his voice.

“It’s my best friends birthday.” you pointed towards your friend who was on the dance floor, dancing with a man she’d had her eye on the whole night.

“And-” you continued “believe it or not it’s the first time I’ve gone out since I last went out with you.“ you said in a serious tone as you pointed at his chest as you felt you were being interrogated.

“Alright, alright missy.” He chuckled before grabbing your hand that had been resting on his chest to interlace his fingers with yours. “No need to get so feisty, I believe you. I’m sorry if I came off defensive.” he finished as he brought your hand close to his lips, placing a gentle kiss.

You’d both been entranced in your own little world, you had not noticed the bartender had placed your drinks in front of you.

Just as you were about to resume your conversation, you were interrupted.

“Hi, you must be Mason. Nice to meet you. Sorry to interrupt but Y/N, I’m going home with Nathan. I’ll pay for your cab home. Don’t wait up, yes I’ll be safe. Love you bye.” your friend said all in one breath as she disappeared following the blonde who was leading the way.

You noticed Mason share a look with the stranger your friend was leaving with as he waved goodbye to both of them.

“So, you talk about me.” Mason smirked at you, getting a boost of confidence, knowing that you talked about him to your friends. Just like he did.

“Mason. You’re focusing on the wrong thing here. She’s going home with a stranger. A blonde one at that. And a short one, too. What if he’s a murderer? What if he kills her on her birthday? Surely no one is that twisted, right?”

He couldn’t help the laugh he let out as he let you rant and he looked at you amusingly.

“My friend’s death funny to you?” you questioned as you found nothing about the situation to be comical.

“The stranger.” he explained, “The blonde, short stranger is my best friend, Nathan. He lives with me. I promise you as soon as I get home, I will make sure your friend’s alive and well. And I will send her to yours back in one piece tomorrow.”

You felt a wave of embarrassment wash over you as you let out a laugh, too. “Oh. I’m sorry. I’m sure he’s lovely and to be fair she’s really short so she doesn’t need someone much taller.” you apologized.”

“I promise you she’ll be okay. Plus, I need to have a serious chat with her tomorrow.”

“Why’s that?”

“I need to thank her…” he begins, inching dangerously closer to your ear as he whispers “for finally letting me see you again.” he finishes his thought by pressing a kiss to your cheek.

Your rolled your eyes at him as you looked away while sipping your drink. You’d very quickly noticed that physical touch was his love language, feeling yourself get shy by the affection he was giving you. Your fourth drink in your hand not helping, as you felt the alcohol catching up to you.

“I gotta be honest with you. I’m kinda drunk right now and would love it if you walked me home. It’s about a 20 minute walk. Only if you can?” you said quietly, afraid of what his answer might be.

He smiled at you, giving you a look you couldn’t quite discern. “I would love to.”

You held his hand as you lead the way through the sweaty bodies on the dance floor. Wanting to let him know that you were okay with his touches without saying it out loud.

As you walked on the streets, you noticed it had began to lightly rain, and without saying anything, he places his jacket around your shoulders. Taking the opportunity to bring himself closer to you.

You two chatted as you lead the way, catching up on what you both had been up to since the last time you’d seen him.

Conversation flowed so naturally with Mason. You felt you could talk about anything and be yourself without fear of judgement. Somewhere along the way, it became clear to you that while you had, indeed, been busy, there was another reason you kept trying to postpone your second date with Mason. If you are honest with yourself, it was probably the main reason. You were scared of how much you liked him. You were scared of how easily you let your guard down with him. Especially with him, Mason Mount. Football superstar, Mason Mount, who surely could have anyone he wanted.

“This is me.” you tell him as you stop walking in front of your building.

“Well, Y/N. I had a lovely time on our second date.” he tells you as he gives you a quick hug and kiss to your forehead.

You stay there for a while, enjoying his embrace and taking in his scent.

“This was not our second date, Mount” you say just above a whisper looking down, afraid to look at him.

“We had drinks. We had a lovely chat while I walked you home for about,” he pulled out his phone from the pocket of his jeans “twenty seven minutes… I got you home safe and sound. And before you go up” he took a brief pause placing his hand on your cheek, forcing you to look at him. “I’m going to give you a quick kiss goodnight, if you let me. And that, miss Y/N, sounds exactly like a second date.

You couldn’t help the smile from forming across your face, blushing as you see him mirror it. Finding the whole thing silly yet endearing.

You both lean into each other as he places a chaste kiss on your lips. A barely there kiss, but just enough to keep you wanting more.

“Well then, I guess you’ll have to text me what to wear for our third date.” you tell him, after a few seconds of silence, as you’re about to give him his jacket back.

“I will see you. In less than three weeks this time. And you can give me my jacket back then. Thank you for another lovely date.” he tells you before you disappear into your flat.

Everything you had felt in your first official date with Mason. Hope, happiness, excitement, fear; you now felt times two.

[sonnet-of-anarchy]

Had a think about it, and I believe the finale was going to cause issues regardless because, really, we’re never going to be satisfied with an ending we didn’t truly want to happen & that’s ok. It’s ok that it’s divisive because people process differently and we’d all an alternative ideology as to how ghosts should conclude.

Essentially, I’m glad the team could end the show on their terms & write a finale they were happy with, but I equally understand people’s dissatisfaction. For me, there were parts I enjoyed and parts that felt off.

I enjoyed the chess husbands, naturally - Julian’s compulsion to make Robin happy really touched me because he’s never really cared about anyone like that before. Unlike s4 he wasn’t doing it to prove a point - it just came naturally. I thought it was interesting to utilise the ghost’s powers in a situation that ‘made them known’ - I know a similar thing happened in the grey lady but I still enjoyed the irony of Julian finally making an impact on the world but, even in death, it wasn’t with a positive outcome. Some things never change (a point I’ll get to later).

The humour landed in places for me too, like Robin being called a pet and his ‘no’s at feeling Christmassy. I also loved the orgy cut & Cap’s baby noises.

What didn’t work for me, like most people, was their leaving after the last resort’s conclusion. It felt a little contradictory - but half of me feels this episode was written/planned quite some time ago hence some characters regressing to their roots (Thomas and Alison, Kitty’s Jealousy).

I thought Robin’s end speech, for a Robin speech, lacked its usual profundity. Yeah, it had the tear-jerking quality because it was finale but substance-wise it felt quite generic and flat? Idk. Like, we know Christmas isn’t about commercialised commodities, every piece of Christmas media on the planet had told us this.

Equally, the ambiguity of the ending/lack of faces (for me) missed the usual friendliness and domestic quality of ghosts (like the s3 finale, for example). As much as knowing all the ghosts were there it felt odd not to see them as throughout the show the charm came from sharing Alison’s gift, as an audience.

There were a few plot points that to me didn’t quite work for me too. Robin said the ever since Alison he’d enjoyed Christmas yet he doesn’t feel the spirit until she decides to leave? The focus on Mike’s Mum was interesting, but as stated her lone, ‘overbearing’ trope had been utilised previously and took the attention away from the MCs somewhat. Personally, I was never a massive fan of the baby plot so I knew that wouldn’t appeal to me so much. The characters regressing to pre-development felt a little frustrating but I sort of understand why they chose to?

Quintessentially, you stays how you dies for better or worse - and I think they were trying to prove that nothing really changes for the ghosts, nothing ever truly moves on and that juxtaposes with Alison and Mike’s new chapter? Like, the ghosts have grown as a result of her influence but there’s only so much Alison could offer? She’s alive and changing and they sort-of realised that - which is character development in itself, I suppose.

They love her and want her to be happy - the show reached a sort-of cycle in that they wanted her to go because they hate her, wanted her to stay because they need her, then let her go because they love her.

Maybe that’s too generic or cheap for a show like ghosts - maybe the ending lacked substance or sense and, to an extent, I agree. But that’s what I think they were trying to do and in part it worked, in part it didn’t. But I’m glad nobody moved on because it embodies the ‘core’ of ghosts that they’re always there just the same in limbo and the world keeps on spinning.

Anyway, those are my thoughts :)

[artistnerd24]

Sending this to people in the fandom i appreciate....... Thank you for all you've done for this community. Thank you for helping me stay positive and making me smile with your posts and reblogs and comments. I appreciate you being in this fandom and I understand if you're no longer able to be with the circumstances, but I enjoyed your company on the ride. I wish you all the best, regardless of what you do. Please know you're loved and appreciated. Remember to drink water and do what makes you happy. <3

Awwwwww Roseyyyyyy 😭😭😭😭😭😭 WHY ARE MY MUTUALS ALL SO SWEET, I DONT DESERVE YOU GUYS 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️

You’ve and all of my moots been the exact same thing to me, beams of sunshine that still gave me hope in the fandom and even though we had just suffered a great loss, seeing you guys and the whole fandom being there for each other made me realize how strong this community is and that there will always be hope no matter what goes wrong :3

Tbh, I am just sad now but I don’t think I’m planning on leaving yet. Hiatus probably, but permanently leaving? I don’t know if I can force myself too. As long as there are the creators that I grew to love over this past year, I’ll still stick around. Besides, after Jaiden, Tina became my main (she never logs on though now so that’s why I’ve been just migrating around and watches different POVs) so as long as she’s on, I’m definitely on, and if she leaves, I have some backups, and my two babies were and have always been Chayanne and Empanada, so as long as Empanada is around, I’m not leaving my baby (I’ll talk about Chayanne in a later post but I’m still just processing what’s next 😅). Plus, fed lore and a bunch of other lore has now grabbed me and will never let me go, and I’m still a fan of other streamers and still have animatic ideas I never got around to cause of continuous art block :) All in all, I don’t think I’m going to ever completely leave, this fandom has helped me out through so much and especially my amazing moots like you so until everyone is gone and moved on, I think I’ll stick around from time to time :D

However this sucks that this happened literally 2 days before my one year anniversary of joining the fandom 😭 (in YT though, qsmpblr was in December so that’ll be a different celebration :D)

Again though, thank you so much for the message Rosey, it really made me smile. I think I’ll just watch some funny videos before going to bed and then sleep and hope that I won’t be a crybaby tomorrow at school and that I can process everything and figure out what to do next :D

Also LOOK I TRY TO DRINK WATER, I REALLY DO, BUT I DONT KNOW WHY MY PROCRASTINATIN BRAIN ALWAYS ENDS UP WITH ME ONLY DRINKING LIKE 2 GLASSES A DAY, I KNOW ITS UNHEALTHY BUT MY BRAIN ALWAYS THINKS ITS BORING AND WANTS TO MOVE ON, I DONT UNDERSTAND IT

[bluedalahorse]

As my identified reference about Sara and August, I have a question for you about the end of s1.

When Sara goes to August's room to confront him, they end up kissing. Before I saw S2, I thought Sara was not really consenting, giving the way she looks away. I thought August was taking avantage of her.

Do you think she was "enjoying it" at that time, but maybe was wondering what was happening ?

Thanks for your ask! I’m happy to be your sargust expert.

And now to address your question. It’s an uncomfortable question to answer, but I’ll do my best to answer it all the same. Content note that we’re about to get into discussing consent and other difficult topics related to sexuality.

Generally my read on the situation is: yes, Sara consented. At the same time, she’s conflicted about her feelings for August in that scene, so I think what we’re seeing when she looks away is her struggling with her feelings about her desires.

While we talk a lot about the more positive depictions of sexual behavior in Young Royals, one thing that’s true about the show is that it actually depicts a range of sexual behaviors. Earlier in season 1, we have Simon nervously but happily kissing Wilhelm on movie night, but we also have Felice showing up at August’s room and initiating a hookup not out of desire but out of feelings of anger and insecurity. Felice and August both consent to the latter encounter, but both of them do so while in a negative headspace. Sara’s encounter with August in 1.6 occupies a sort of middle space between these two extremes. This is even evident by how the scene is blocked and directed. Sara showing up at August’s door reminds us of the way Felice shows up, but her first tentative kisses remind us of Simon on movie night. Sara does feel genuine desire—she’s the one who initiates the kissing, at first—but she’s also struggling with that desire and what it means for her understanding of herself, her relationship with her family, etc.

Another piece of important context for the confrontation scene is that both Sara and August are in not the best headspace. August has been grappling with the fact that he betrayed his core value of discretion released the video, and a lot of the buried resentment he feels toward Wilhelm has come to the surface. This is coming on the heels of August barely avoiding being kicked out of Hillerska after not being able to pay his boarding feels. Sara encountered her father in person on Lucia night—something caused by Simon going behind her back—and her house is now being hounded by journalists and her mom is threatening to pull her out of a school where she’s finally made friends. While neither of them is in as awful or traumatic a place as Wilhelm or Simon, for obvious reasons, I don’t imagine either of them has been sleeping well or taking care of themselves. This is likely something that’s cutting down on their usual inhibitions, and their decisions are driven partially by bad mental health/a stress response.

Regardless of the fact that Sara consents, I also think we’re meant to feel uncomfortable in that scene because we know how quickly things could go in a negative direction where Sara’s consent is disregarded. We know August’s views of women are crap. He has a lot more privilege, between the two of them, and he’s physically taller and stronger than Sara. If I recall (I’m trying not to rewatch the scene right now so I don’t accidentally rewatch Young Royals when I need to get work done) we even see him lift Sara up and put her on his desk. In a more idealized/less realistic teen drama, the directors might have tried to turn this into a ~sexy move~ via camera work, lighting, and sound mixing. But here it’s merely a demonstration of physical strength, and one that Sara’s not initially expecting. I don’t think Sara’s feeling threatened or coerced, in that moment, even if she’s surprised and even if all of this physical contact is new to her—I imagine season 2 would have played out very differently if she had felt that way—but I do think that we, as audience members, are supposed to feel the possibility of that threat, and worry for her.

(Something I also have considered in season 2 is the way that Sara is initiating a lot of the physical contact at the beginning of season 2, while also knowing August’s secret. Theoretically she could have blackmailed him into hooking up with her by threatening to go to the police with information. She doesn’t attempt to blackmail him, and August consents to physical contact with her even when he’s surprised by it. But the context in which Sara kisses August in 2.2 is supposed to bring this idea into our head, I think. Maybe. I go back and forth on what the writers want us to think there.)

Another way to think about these scenes, also, is that some sex educators recognize multiple categories of consent. For instance, Angela Chen recognizes four in her book on asexuality. Chen would probably label Sara’s consent in 1.6 as willing, but not enthusiastic. Likewise with August’s consent in 2.2.

Tl;dr consent is a complex topic and different sex educators have different paradigms about consent. Young Royals wholly acknowledges the importance of consent in sexual situations, while also acknowledging that not everyone who consents does so at perfect times, or with pure, uninterrupted feelings of love and desire in their heart. And I think being aware of that makes it easier to interpret scenes like the one above.

Hope this answers your question! There really are a lot of emotional layers to this show.

[la-nom-nom]

Modern Amy does have the flanderizations unlike Classic and Boom, but THIS Amy had most of the best moments too. Here’s what Modern has canonically under her belt:

SA1 she saw the bigger picture involving Gamma, she pointed out that love isn’t part of robot’s’ programming and they’re missing something good.

Also in SA1 she stepped up to Sonic from destroying Gamma; stepping up to your crush especially when you haven’t won their heart yet is harder than we think. When liking someone it’s normal to try being on the best terms with them. If they’re doing something that rubs you the wrong way that could taint those terms. (Ofc it’s the right thing to step up regardless)

Her moment with Shadow from SA2. It has been discussed many times why it’s so good but I’ll at least put down this: Amy KNOWS there’s shitty people and bad things but she also sympathizes for others and decides to see the good anyway. It’s waaaay easier to fall into negativity and despair when things get bad. This moment is somewhat similar to the story Pandora’s Box when all the bad stuff flew out but one thing within that seems so tiny but is powerful which was hope. Deciding to see the good is like that hope.

Heroes has been seen as this as one of Amy’s more infamous portrayals but really? Was her crush for Sonic executed the best? Depends on the person, but not the worst. Still, she stayed with her team until they reached their goal. Sure she knew doing that will lead her to Sonic but once again, it’s not bad. Why isn’t anyone complaining about the fact the Chaotix, Rouge, Sonic, Shadow were picking fights too? WTFH…

In Battle, another portrayal and one I actually think isn’t so good, or part of it. (Girl, starving yourself thinking Sonic will like you if you’re skinny? Really? If Sonic has issues then that’s his issue not yours!) However, she helped Emerl with his skills. She was pretty much like everyone else but yet none of them get pointed out for their portrayals.

Riders is sorta known for the bad portrayal between her and Sonic but really it wasn’t bad (the voice direction like tone of voice was different between the English and Japanese, the ladder being more accurate to the characters) until the very end of Heroes story which was when Sonic blew her away along with Eggman. Can’t we be in her shoes for a moment? If someone, one of your friends SonAmy or not they are friends didn’t consider your safety especially like THAT would you be happy? Don’t think so. It’s valid to be pissed. Ofc you should point it out.

06 might’ve been (technically) erased but it still shows Amy’s positive side. If it were to happen again and not be erased there’s little to no doubt that Amy would do the same thing. Like in SA1 she saw the bigger picture by putting aside her crush for Sonic and saving the world. One of things it highlighted was her loyalty. This did show in Heroes too, if she wasn’t loyal she would’ve ditched Cream and Big. People can say all they want about Amy choosing Sonic over the world; the other option is to BETRAY her friend who she’s known for a long time and be like, “Hey, Sonic, my friend who I just met Silver who says you’ll destroy the world so I’m siding with him.” THAT would be bad. (Though in Silver’s defense it was from a valid sense and didn’t know who Sonic was but that’s not the focus right now. Amy is brave for stepping up to Silver who clearly outclassed her in skills) Can we also point out that Rouge and Omega did the same thing yet nobody complained about that? Even if it was worded differently, there’s still a sense of hypocrisy.

Rush had Amy tell Blaze, who was very closed off, about the idea that having friends is truly uplifting. Heck Blaze was even intrigued and had a slight smile because of Amy’s upbeat vibe.

Unleashed highlighted Amy to be in no way shallow when it comes to her crush with Sonic: she states to Sonic that no matter what, he’s still her Sonic. How sweet and endearing is that? She even planned to throw a party for him. Clearly she was trying to uplift his spirit. Sonic wasn’t going through a good time, externally and internally. When all hope seemed lost she openly said that Sonic WILL succeed. Also highlighting her faith, another powerful thing. She had faith in previous games too, like having faith that Sonic will listen to her to not destroy Gamma, faith in the good of humanity in SA2, and as mentioned earlier her faith that in 06 Sonic would never destroy the world but save it.

All of the examples above are from the time era of her “obsessive” days that detractors like use to prove that she’s just a “stalker/yandere/etc”.

I will admit that things like Sonic X didn’t do her justice during that era. Though that is partly thanks to the shit English dub and SOA.

Post 2010 hasn’t really been too great but even in Lost World she told Sonic to save the world, believing there’s a chance even though she felt for sure she wasn’t going to be alive for it. She did say it was too late but it felt like she was referring to the latter, not her having a lack of faith. In Forces she was part of the Resistance. Like previous titles she did her part. Minus a few games, she was always an active participant, even in a game like the Black Knight while even it was not exactly the Amy Sonic knew, Nimue was still a counterpart. Like in the Secret Rings with Ali Babba!Tails and Sinbad!Knuckles there was a connection to Sonic’s POV. Frontiers has been pointed with its faults especially with storytelling (seriously previous games, even the most beloved ones, had this issue too) but even then the desire of Amy wanting to help, like she always has, was there.

Modern Amy has proven to be a brave, positive, uplifting, helpful, kind, and a non shallow girl who definitely cares about Sonic’s wellbeing. If having those qualities is STILL viewed as the worst portrayal of the character… 🤦🏻‍♀️

P.S.: This post sprouted from seeing comments upholding Classic Amy(from the latest news) and a few for Boom while downplaying Modern Amy. Heck someone literally commented “Classic Amy over Insamy any day.” Insamy means Insane Amy Seriously? It’s cool to see Amy getting love but some people forget that Classic Amy is a younger Modern Amy, soooooo they’re really shitting on the one they “really” like?

[faulty-writes]

[ So, I saw this picture and I instantly thought of a one-shot I could write. So this is my contribution to the fanfiction world for the holiday season. So let us all rejoice at the holiday miracle that is me publishing this before December 25th. ]

[ You knew Tenya had a knack for getting into the perfect mindset of characters, but when he decided to dress up as Santa in hopes to enlighten Eri's holiday season and your classmates insist you be the one to sit on his lap to show her he isn't scary, you make the mistake of telling him what you truly want for a gift this year. Can he grant your wish, or will this season turn sour? ]

“Um, Iida are you sure this is a good idea?” Izuku questioned with a pointed finger while Uraraka covered her mouth to suppress her giggles. “Why of course!” he replied, holding out one of his gloved hands before chopping it furiously through the air.

“As heroes, it is our responsibility to ensure that Eri experiences the holiday season accordingly, this includes the traditions that have been associated with it!” he said, hearing Izuku’s nervous chuckle in response. “Uh, r-right. But um…a-are you sure she’ll be okay with…” he paused, scanning Tenya’s outfit.

He was wearing a red hat that had white trim around the bottom of it and a small exhaust pipe made up the end tip of the tail. In addition, he had fake eyebrows that looked bushy and matched with the equally as bushy fake beard he was wearing which concealed the bottom half of his face.

The rest of his outfit consisted of a red pullover jacket that was trimmed with white fur on the ends of the sleeves and a trail of it going down the center. The trail of fur was lined with several black buttons, and he was wearing matching red pants with black boots.

“I’m most certain she’ll enjoy learning about the childhood fable of Santa Claus and what better way to execute it than through demonstration!” he announced, curling his hands in front of himself and swaying his hips back and forth.

Uraraka snickered and laid her hand on Izuku’s shoulder. “I-Iida sure d-does look f-f-funny!” she hollered out, causing the green-haired boy to panic. “Pardon!?” Tenya replied, once again chopping his hand through the air while Izuku looked between the two of them nervously.

Tenya was a sight to see on a normal day and was slightly overkilling it now. Then again, it was sweet to know he cared so much about making Eri’s holiday season magical. But you didn’t get much time to continue to admire his costume because Eijirou shouted, “Here she comes!” from his position at the front door.

Tenya had requested he inform everyone of when Eri arrived so he could properly execute his plan. He frantically waved his arms about before pressing a finger to his lips to signal Uraraka to stop laughing, but she seemed to be having trouble.

“Um…” you walked over, knowing that getting a lecture from the class president wasn’t exactly the best experience even though your heart sped up whenever you were around him even in the ridiculous outfit he was currently wearing.

“Oh hi, Y/n,” Izuku said shyly as you approached and grabbed Uraraka’s arm. “Hi, Midoriya,” you greeted with a friendly wave. “I’ll just take Ochako,” you guided her away from the two boys just in time for the front doors to open.

There stood Eri, who was wearing a holiday-themed dress and a pink colored Santa hat. “Uh…” she glanced around nervously before looking at Shota who had accompanied her. Apart from the Santa hat, he too was wearing, he didn’t look all that happy.

You knew this was normal, but the man could at least crack a smile. After all, it was the glorious holiday season. But maybe Mr. Aizawa just viewed things as being bleak no matter what time of year. Regardless, he stepped through the door and glanced around as if making sure you were all behaving.

Then he leaned back and asked, “Where’s this surprise?” before sighing. “Oh, Iida has something special planned for Eri!” Ashido spoke up with a smile, as she was one of the few that weren’t afraid to directly address your teacher. Shota blinked in response and looked around.

“And where is he?” a loud and slightly obnoxious “Ho, ho, ho!” echoed through the room, making Shota raise his eyebrow. “Mm…” Eri subconsciously stepped closer to Mr. Aizawa and grasped onto his pant leg. His response to this was leaning down to pick her up, believing she’d be more comfortable in his arms.

He sighed again as Tenya walked over, dressed as Santa Claus, nonetheless. Then again, one of Tenya’s strengths was being able to adapt to the mindset of a certain character when needed and he did it in an almost flawless manner which would be useful if he were to ever go undercover during his hero career.

“Hello!” he said in a deep and over-exaggerated voice, “My name is Santa Claus, it’s quite a pleasure to meet you Eri!” he announced while chopping his hands through the air rapidly. Eri tightened her grip on Mr. Aizawa obviously frightened by this strange new person in front of her.

“It’s okay!” Ashido said, stepping in front of Tenya. “Santa isn’t scary! In fact, he’s here because he wants to know what kind of gift you want this year!” she explained quickly and Eri frowned. “G-gift?” she repeated, watching the pink-haired girl nod.

Shota shrugged and lowered her back onto the floor as Ashido continued to speak. “Mmhm, that’s right. You’ve been such a good girl this year, you get to ask Santa for one thing you really want, and he must give it to you!” Eri’s eyes lit up and she clasped her hands together.

“Really?” she asked. “Yup, but you have to sit on his lap and whisper what you want into his ear,” she explained before holding out her hand. “We’ll go see him together!” she offered, and Tenya took this as his cue to go sit in one of the living room chairs.

Eri looked at the offered hand with uncertainty before glancing up at Shota who simply nodded. She latched onto her lip and nervously looked back at Ashido, “O-okay,” she replied before grabbing her hand. You smiled and waved at Eri as she walked by you and Uraraka who pulled on the sleeve of your shirt seconds later.

“What?” you said jerking your arm away from her. “Why don’t we follow? I need to get another good look at Iida in that outfit,” she said with a cheerful giggle, and you raised your eyebrow. You were unsure how Eri would feel if she had too many people watching her try to interact with Santa.

“Mm…” you chewed on your bottom lip, thinking it over before turning to Uraraka and nodding. “Great, let’s go!” she replied, reaching down to grab your hand. She dragged you to the living room and stood just a little way away from Ashido and Eri.

“See?” the pink-haired girl said before crouching down and placing her hands on the little girl’s shoulders. “This is Santa!” she said with a smile, although Eri's face was twisted in slight horror at the sight of him and she flinched when he leaned down and exclaimed, “Ho, ho, ho!”

“Eri! I’ve heard you’ve been quite the good girl this year!” her bottom lip trembled, and her eyes misted over. “Huh?” Ashido blinked as the little girl proceeded to hide behind her. “Wait, there’s nothing to be afraid of! Um…” she glanced around, and low and behold her eyes landed on you.

“Y/n!” she shouted, pointing her finger, and making you jump out of your skin. “What?!” you responded frantically, failing to notice that you had latched onto Uraraka in the process of being scared. “Oh oops,” you said, giving an awkward chuckle as you released her.

“Heh, sorry about that,” you rubbed the back of your head with the slightest flush. However, before she could respond Ashido walked over and grabbed your arm, dragging you away. “Hey!” you cried out only to be silenced when she shoved her finger in your face.

“Shhh!” she demanded before gesturing her head toward Eri who still looked frightened, and Tenya shifted in his seat awkwardly waiting for something to happen. “Show Eri that Iida, I mean Santa isn’t scary!” she demanded, now pointing her finger at him.

You slumped your shoulders, looking at her with wide eyes and a distorted expression. “Uh…what?” she huffed and stiffened her posture before walking behind you and grabbing your shoulders. “Come on! Do it for Eri!” she said, beginning to push you closer and closer to Tenya despite you digging your feet into the floor.

“Just sit on his lap and tell him what you want! It’ll be just like when you were a kid,” she said with a smirk, and you frantically shook your head. Sure, you might have sat on Santa’s lap when you were a kid. You honestly couldn’t remember, but this was entirely different.

This Santa was someone you happened to have feelings for, the person that made your heart accelerate and butterflies grow in your stomach whenever he looked at you. “W-well I…t-the thing is-” before you could finish, you were startled by the sound of Tenya laughing and turned to look at him.

“I’m quite sure I have the appropriate amount of time to listen to what you would like to receive as a gift as well!” he exclaimed, and you narrowed your eyes. How was he okay with this or was he just too far gone in his portrayal of Santa to realize how weird this was?

“I’ve heard you’ve been quite the good hero this year!” Well...that answers that. The corner of your mouth curled and despite the awkwardness beginning to consume your very soul, you were partly thankful no one had commented on your reddened cheeks.

Were you really this embarrassed at the idea of sitting on Tenya’s lap? Then again, knowing that some of your classmates were going to witness this ordeal made it that much more embarrassing. “Um…” leaning back, you uncomfortably shifted on your feet.

“C-can’t someone else-” you let out a yelp when Ashido proceeded to punch you in the back. “Come on! It’ll be fun telling Santa what you want,” you growled and turned around. “I swear to-” you were interrupted when Eijirou came over and laid his hand on your shoulder.

“Of course, Y/n will sit on Santa’s lap!” he said before turning to Eri with a smile, despite his teeth being a slightly frightening sight to her. “Then you can! Don’t worry, if he tries anything you’re surrounded by heroes so it should be easy breezy lemon squeezy!” he declared with a chuckle.

You’d try to hit him, but it was the holiday, and considering his skin could harden it would probably be pointless to try and inflict pain on him. You tilted your head back, sighing loudly. “Ahhhh, fine!” you exclaimed before crossing your arms and shyly looking away.

“I’ll…I’ll do it...” you muttered and Eijirou smirked, “That’s the spirit, go get’em!” he said before pushing you toward Tenya. Ashido smiled and looked at Eri. “See? Just watch how Y/n interacts with Santa!” she said and Eri nodded in response before looking at you and Eijirou.

“Ah hey! Okay, okay!” you replied, wiggling your body this way and that to get his hands off you. Then you looked at Tenya, feeling slightly pathetic because of the way your heart raced. “Um…so yeah uh…” you rubbed the back of your head. “Come closer young one! Do not be afraid!” Tenya replied, and you almost rolled your eyes.

That Santa voice of his was going to get old quick. “Um…” you glanced away, feeling your friend's and Eri's stares beginning to burn a hole through you. Sighing, you stepped closer and watched as Tenya gestured to his lap to signal you to sit down, but you hesitated.

“Come now!” he said before leaning closer and pressing his hand to the side of his mouth despite the beard making it a little difficult. “This is a required demonstration for Eri, I advise you to perform it accordingly,” he whispered before leaning back.

You frowned and balled your hands into tight fists, “Fine!” you replied before awkwardly sitting on his lap. Those butterflies began to twist knots in your stomach, and you tried to ignore the fact that your cheeks were now as red as the suit he wore.

You could feel the way he shifted his legs, trying to adjust to your weight which caused you to wrap your arms around him out of instinct considering you didn’t want to fall. You gasped and felt tingles course through your body when his hand came to rest on the small of your back.

“Uh, I-Iida,” you said, but he was too far gone and tilted his head back, giving another obnoxious laugh. “Hello, Y/n! What would you like to request this year? Please do not hesitate to whisper it into Santa’s ear to ensure it remains a secret!” your eyebrow twitched, and you were tempted to get up and leave.

Then again, you didn’t want to ruin Eri’s holiday. “Um, well I…” you paused, what did you want? Not much. In fact, there was only one thing you thought you wanted, and Tenya was the only one that could give it to you.

Of course, you couldn’t directly say you wanted this thing from him. So instead, with some courage, you leaned forward and hovered your lips next to his ear only to hesitate like earlier. You heard Tenya mumble a soft, “Hm?” and took a deep breath, it was now or never.

“I want a kiss from…t-the boy I like,” you almost immediately felt his body stiffen in response. He found himself speechless at your request or rather confession. He blinked a few times before clearing his throat, “I…S-Santa will try his best, but now I believe it is Eri’s turn!” he said, trying to usher you off his lap.

“Oh um…” you went to move, but Ashido grabbed your shoulder. “Wait you forgot to take a picture with Iid-Santa!” she said, but you were feeling too embarrassed now to even care about something like taking a picture.

“Mina, I really need to go…” you said, prying her hand off your shoulder. “Huh?” She looked surprised but allowed you to slide off Tenya’s lap. “Hey, is everything alright?” Eijirou asked as you passed him with your face covered, intent on running to the safety of your room.

Shota was watching your interaction with Tenya from his position near the front entrance. He was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed and his eyes narrowed. “Mm…” he mumbled before kicking off the wall and walking after you.

“Keep watching Eri,” he instructed as he passed Eijirou and continued into the hallway. ‘What was I even thinking!?’ you frantically screamed inside your head, running down the hallway with your hands pressed firmly to the sides of your cheeks which felt as if they were set ablaze.

‘I’m so stupid! Who asks for a kiss as a gift!?’ you let out a soft whine when you reached your door and quickly entered your bedroom. You sighed, pressing your back against the door and your nails dug into the wood as your thoughts continued.

‘M-maybe I can just go back and tell him it was all a prank. Yeah, hey Iida wasn’t it funny what I said? I got you good, didn’t I?! Hah hah haaaaaah…I’m pathetic…’ you groaned and slumped against the door, wanting to slide all the way down to the floor, but a gentle knocking distracted you.

You froze and your eyes widened. Was Tenya at your door? No, that couldn’t possibly be. He was with Eri, or he should be? Well, either way, it would be rude not to answer. You drew your bottom lip into your mouth, sinking your teeth into it as you turned and nervously opened the door.

“Huh?” you blinked when you saw who was standing on the other side. “M-Mr. Aizawa?” you questioned, watching him close his eyes and nod in response. “Uh, what are-hey!” you frowned when he proceeded to walk into your room without permission.

Then again, he was your teacher, and he didn’t quite seem to follow the rules of proper manners. You rolled your eyes and decided to keep your door open but crossed your arms and turned to see him take a seat on your bed with the tips of his fingers pressed together and his elbows resting on his thighs.

“Uh…heh,” you looked confused before flashing him a smile. “I-is there something you need Mr. Aizawa, sir?” you asked, it was no surprise that many of your classmates were intimidated by this man, and it caused you anxiety thinking over all the possible reasons he might want to talk to you. Was it bad, good, or neither?!

“Calm down,” he said, making you jump in surprise. You glanced to the side, damn it…did he only say that because you looked frightened or something? “Uh…” you folded your hands in front of you, twiddling your thumbs together. “So…why are you here?” maybe if you were more direct, you’d get a clear answer.

He stared at you for a minute or two, making you more uncomfortable than you already were before lifting one hand in the air and motioning you over with his finger. You tilted your head to the side with your eyebrows knitted together but did as he asked.

“What happened?” he inquired once you were close enough and you trembled in response. “W-what happened with what? I d-don’t know-” you stumbled back when he stood up and leered down at you, even without his quirk activated those eyes of his were a frightening sight.

“Don’t say you don’t know,” he said flatly and while his words weren’t intimidating, they still made you feel small. You sighed and slumped your shoulders. “N-nothing happened I just-” he stepped forward, making you stumble back again.

“Y/n,” he said, and you could hear the annoyance in his voice. Throwing your head back, you groaned before stomping your foot. “I said something stupid, okay!?” you suddenly snapped before covering your mouth. “I-I’m sorry!” you did not want to risk igniting his wrath.

However, he seemed unphased by the way you snapped at him. “And what exactly was this stupid thing?” he questioned, crossing his arms. You frowned and slowly curled one hand into the front of your shirt, “I…uh…I’m not sure if I’m comfortable-” before you could finish, he interrupted you.

“What happened with Iida?” he asked bluntly and impatiently tapped his foot against the floor. Your heart accelerated at that moment, and you looked at him with flushed cheeks which you knew he noticed given the fact his eyes narrowed.

You sighed heavily and looked at the floor, even though it was rude to avoid eye contact when speaking to another individual. “Mm…” you groaned and placed your hand on the back of your head, rubbing it awkwardly as if that would help anything.

“I told him what I…w-wanted…that’s all,” you muttered under your breath, and cringed when Mr. Aizawa responded with a “What?” You whined before shouting, “Why are you so dense!?” Yes, you had forgotten that your door was open, and others could possibly hear you.

But considering everyone was in the living room, or was supposed to be, that was unlikely. He kept that same unhappy expression on his face as you continued to snap at him. “I told Iida that I wanted a kiss from the person I like, okay!?” You moved your hands rapidly through the air which ironically resembled Tenya.

“But that was-ah! B-because he’s the one I like and now I must live with the fact I told him that I wanted a kiss from the person I like when he’s the person I like, and I don’t know what to do now and-” you knew you were acting frantic and repeating yourself.

Your eyes watered over, and you quickly wiped them with the back of your hand believing that Mr. Aizawa wouldn't notice. However, they only watered over again. “I’m so stupid,” you whispered, looking away from him.

He suspected something had happened between the two of you given the way you dismissed yourself from the room, and while he knew the policy Yuuei had about dating and that heroes didn’t typically involve themselves in romance.

There wasn’t much one could do when it came to matters of the heart, except maybe break their own. “Well,” he said, dropping his arms. “I won’t stand in your way if you try to pursue him,” if it didn’t interfere with your hero studies, that is. You blinked, “Huh?” Was he being serious?

Before you could ask him anything, he brushed past you and toward your door. Laying one hand on the doorframe, he kept his back to you and said, “You shouldn’t be afraid to say how you feel about someone because it’s often said too late,” and although you couldn't see his pained expression, there was a certain burden to his words.

You knew nothing about Mr. Aizawa’s past nor the fact he was referring to a friend he lost when he was a student. “I…uh…” you shifted uncomfortably, wanting to ask if he was okay but he grabbed the handle of your door and shut it when he stepped out into the hallway, leaving you alone with your thoughts again.

You sighed and slumped your shoulders, maybe Mr. Aizawa was right. Even if you sort of made a fool out of yourself and possibly got rejected by Tenya, it was better to have at least faced your feelings head-on or face the consequences of having already attempted to confess your feelings? Jeez, this was complicated.

“Ahhh, but what am I going to do or say when I see him again!?” you exclaimed falling onto your bed and burying your face into your pillow. You needed some time to think this over, but at some point, in your thought process you ended up falling asleep and hours passed before you suddenly jolted awake.

“Hm?” you blinked, noticing that your room was now pitch black and everything was quiet. “What time is it?” you asked, yawning as you leaned over to look at the digital clock that sat on your nightstand. It was past curfew, which meant everyone was either sleeping or quietly watching movies in the living room.

“Hm…” you placed your hands over your stomach, feeling it rumble. ‘Guess I’m hungry,’ you thought before scooting to the edge of your bed. Bending one arm behind your head, you stretched the other toward the ceiling and cracked your back before opening your door and walking down the hallway.

However, you came to a stop when you reached the darkened living room and glanced at the tree that illuminated the room with different colored hues every few seconds. But that’s not what initially caught your eye, rather it was who was standing in front of the tree.

“Iida?” you asked, shyly approaching him with your hands folded behind your back. He turned around, and your heart skipped a beat when you noticed he wasn’t wearing his glasses which made his gorgeous red eyes stand out even in the semi-dark room.

The blue and white striped pajama set he was currently wearing almost made you chuckle. He even had a matching sleeping cap with a white puff ball at the end of it. Somehow, he had to outdo himself even with sleeping wear.

“Oh, hello Y/n,” he said, concerned about why you were up and felt the urge to address the way you had acted earlier. But perhaps he should tackle one problem at a time, regardless of what had happened earlier, he was quite happy that he had positively impacted Eri’s holiday season.

“Do you require assistance? It’s damaging to one’s physical and mental health if they do not receive the required hours of sleep needed to function properly,” he explained, and the way you chuckled in response caused him to frown.

As class president, he was used to others laughing at his suggestions and continuing their rebellious ways even after he politely asked them to stop. But he had expected better behavior from you considering you weren't the type to act in such a disrespectful manner.

“I could say the same thing to you,” despite the fact your heart was racing, you were slightly thankful he couldn’t see your flushed face given his lack of glasses and the lack of light in the room. “Heh,” you flashed a smile, but it quickly faded.

“Uh…Iida…” ducking your head in shyness, you glanced to the side not exactly willing to speak your next words but if you wanted the awkward tension from earlier to disappear, you needed to address what had happened.

“Yes?” he replied, stepping closer to you which only caused your flush to deepen. “Um…so,” you looked at him nervously. “About earlier,” you said, feeling your chest grow heavy. “I didn’t mean to…uh, I’m sorry if…if I made you feel weird or awkward or-” you stopped speaking when he stepped even closer.

“Please do not apologize, I had not anticipated such a request. However,” he paused and the way he leered at you sent a shiver down your spine. “I believe it would be rather poor if a hero did not attempt to do what is possible within their power,” he stated before holding his hands out.

“May I?” he questioned, and you looked confused for a moment. “Uh, do you want me to?” you motioned with your hands, and he nodded. Another shiver ran down your spine when his fingers closed around the tops of your hands, and you dared to lock eyes with him despite the way your heart continued to race in your chest.

“I wish to grant your holiday request,” he said. “W-what!?” you exclaimed before rapidly shaking your head as butterflies exploded in your stomach. “Oh n-no, you d-don’t have to do that I-” he interrupted you, “Mr. Aizawa had spoken to me,” your expression changed to horror.

“H-h-he did what?” you asked in disbelief and Tenya took a deep breath, given that he didn’t exactly favor repeating himself. “I understand that perhaps your request was due to my failure as I did not realize you harbored feelings of affection for me,” you groaned.

‘I feel like killing that teacher now’ you thought bitterly, why did he even say that stuff about not standing in your way and confessing your feelings if he was just going to tell Tenya how you felt behind your back!? Well, maybe the fact he wanted to give you what you had asked for meant he felt the same way?

“I…” for a split second, you had thought about declining. After all, it was late, and you were hungry. Then again, you had dreamed of this moment for so long and it would be foolish to pass it up. You tightened your grip on his hands and with a soft sigh, you closed your eyes and balanced yourself on the tips of your toes.

Although he was a tad nervous, he would feel a great deal of satisfaction knowing that he had given you the very thing you wanted. “Happy holidays, Y/n,” he stated before leaning down and pressing his lips against yours, hoping the kiss would be satisfactory.

He noticed your lips felt soft, and a certain, indescribable warmth washed over him causing his knees to grow weak. Those butterflies multiplied, making your stomach twist with delight. His lips were firm, and you could taste the faint linger of spearmint.

It was almost like time had stopped, and the world around you went silent. It wasn’t until you found yourself pulling away and panting did you realize how sweet, but passionate the kiss was. Your lips were tingling, and you heard the quiet but slightly uneasy pants coming from Tenya.

Before you could say anything, your stomach growled causing you to wince in response and rip your hands away from his. “Hm?” he blinked, trying to regain his composure. His overall body temperature seemed to have risen, given the fact he felt slightly warmer than previously.

His heart was beating at an unusual rate, and he noticed that a faint feeling of nervousness was causing his stomach to twist into knots. But he also felt happy, and he assumed it was because he had fulfilled your request but in the back of his mind, he knew it was for another reason entirely.

Yet, he couldn’t properly address it now seeing as he was more preoccupied with the way your stomach had growled indicating you were hungry. He cleared his throat, finally regaining his composure and catching your attention.

“Perhaps we should find sustenance, I believe there are numerous baked goods in the kitchen from earlier in the day,” he suggested, and your eyes widened, you hadn’t expected him of all people to insist on eating sweets so late at night.

“However, we must ensure to brush our teeth accordingly after we have finished consuming the baked goods,” ah, there it was. Still, you couldn't help but smile. Tenya was always so caring and responsible. It was no wonder you fell for him.

You giggled softly and nodded. “Very well, please follow me,” he insisted, before walking toward the kitchen and you trailed right behind him. Even if you happened to get a stomachache, this was the best holiday season you’d had in a long time.

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

@allvalley100

Prompt: Superstition

Pairing: Hawkmetri

The rest of this AV100 prompt that I didn't have time to finish before the prompt closed XD This one is a 7-parter--700 words total! Only fitting they should get a happy ending for the last AV100 post I write for them <3

***

Day 38

Talked to Eli about his…interesting new lady friends. They’re making me miss when he was hung up on Moon, honestly.

Anyways, turns out they’re just some exiled lesbians he took pity on. Families disowned them for kissing women, growing fangs, etc etc. Last I heard, Yas is single—maybe she’d want their numbers?

Woke up with a couple (bite?) sores on my neck, so I asked Eli about his pest control situation. He says everything’s fine, but I have my doubts.

Side note: Are metal allergies possible? Had to toss that silver crucifix—damn thing gave me hives.

*

Day 40

Confession: I’m worried about Eli.

There was an…incident a few days ago, and I hoped if I mulled it over enough times, it’d start making sense. Wishful thinking.

Was shaving the other morning when Eli barged in. Funny, I didn’t see him coming in my shaving mirror—can those things glitch? Thought that was only Smart Mirrors™️.

He started ranting about how “mirrors are for pussies,” and threw mine out the window??? Incredibly inconsiderate.

He insisted I didn’t need to shave because I’d look hot with a beard. How do you tell if someone’s joke-flirting or actual flirting?

*

Day 45

Have I mentioned Eli’s weird about blood now? Unsure I like it.

Cut myself on some loose board (this castle needs renovation), and he freaked out. Wouldn’t even look at it! Wailed about “blood being too precious to waste” and ran away. Huh.

Townsperson banged on the door today, telling Eli to stop eating people. I opened to tell him that was nonsense, but I noticed he smelled...appetizing? Like a gyro wrap.

He made himself scarce before I could say anything, but…kind of hurtful, honestly. I know I’m a bit gangly, but I’m not that ugly, am I?

*

Day 47

Finally got a wifi signal in here! Only took 4 hours of fiddling to make Eli’s TV work.

We binged Castlevania today. Eli’s favorite character is Dracula, supposedly because he’s “such a badass and is gonna kick the asses of every one of those lame humans.” I think it has more to do with Dracula having a soft spot for a smart, good-hearted human who he goes absolutely batshit avenging, but Eli’d never admit to this.

Side note: Is it hypothetically possible for one’s reflection to gradually grow more and more translucent and dead-looking? Asking for a friend.

*

Day 50

Bad news: Eli ate the mailman today, and I…may have helped.

Walked in on him draining the guy’s blood, and naturally demanded an explanation. Eli said to settle down because “there’s plenty to share!” What an insane suggestion.

But since the mailman was already dead...

In my defense…best AB positive I’ve ever had. Not that I’ve had much. I’ve dabbled a couple times, but who hasn’t?

In better news: Wearing the “amnesia” down! We’ve been reading through the library together, and Eli’s instinctively remembering what kinds of fantasy and sci-fi I like. He remembers me—I FEEL it.

*

Day 60

Okay! Know what’s going on now.

We were reading Buffy comics when Eli clutched his head and started shrieking. Everything came back at once.

After I calmed him down, he spilled everything. Getting involved with a Kung-Fu-practicing vampiric “organization” promising nigh-unlimited badassery. Being taken to Europe, undeadified, and given a blood-only diet…none of which sharpened his memory.

Admitted I’m not inheriting a Greek estate, and I only came to find him. He tearfully told me that’s a shame. He imagined us building a life there. Maybe raising some goats?

Fuck it—if he wants, I’ll make that happen.

*

Day 140

Been a while! Busy, busy!

Surprisingly easy talking “distant family members” into giving us a land plot. Maybe it’s superstition. Maybe it’s healthy fear. Regardless, people don’t like saying no to weird, sharp-toothed out-of-towners.

Made Eli promise he’ll discuss with me before joining any new martial arts-related cults (especially ones that strand him in isolated castles as soon as he “isn’t evil enough”). Now he only feeds every so often! We’ve gone through some neighbors, but it’s an improvement over Transylvania.

Also, our eldest nannygoat gave birth! Eli named the kids Hellraiser, Slayer, and Wrathchild. I love them.

[nerdlydelicious]

apologies for all the asks!!! I don’t have many folks I chat RWBY with so I turn to the folks who’s opinions I’ve come to respect on tumblr!

Anyways - with the final episode of Volume 9 rapidly approaching, what do you think needs to happen in the finale for it to be concluded in a satisfying way?

cheers!

You’re fine, I like answering questions!

As for what needs to happen, in my personal opinion, the things that I think need to happen are as follows, but not strictly in this order:

1. Ruby has a talk with her mother, at least in some fashion, which helps her realize that she doesn’t need to be a completely different person to be the hero she needs to be, which helps her complete her ascension.

2. We also go through Jaune’s ascension and he is changed into a younger version of himself, but specifically not reverted back to his Volume 8 form as that would be literal character regression. Also, he keeps the warrior’s wolf tail.

3. Both Ruby and Jaune retain all their memories after ascension, and get new looks, and either upgraded or new weapons.

4. Ascended Ruby and Jaune tag team Neko Neo and kick his ass.

5. Neko Neo dies/gets taken by the tree to ascend. Don’t give either of them a second chance or a redemption arc.

6. Everyone has a tearful reunion with Ruby, apologizing that they weren’t there for her when she needed them and she forgives them.

7. Team RWBY and Jaune walk through the door into Remnant, and either the episode ends there to leave us on a cliff hanger for V10, or they walk out into Vacuo to throw us right into the action at the start of V10. Bonus points if Juniper goes with them.

8. We see Little again at some point. Maybe they help fight the cat in their new ascended form. And we get a heartfelt moment between them and Ruby.

As a bonus these are things that I don’t think have to happen for the finals to be satisfactory, but I’ll be very happy if they do:

1: when Jaune returns Weiss hugs him or in some way shows relief that he’s okay. Bonus points if she comments positively about his new look. It shouldn’t be a moment that overshadows the big reunion with Ruby (though I’m sure some people will gripe about it regardless), just a nice little touching scene between them.

2. Ruby lands the fight ending blow on the cat with her Silver Eyes powers. I don’t know why her powers would affect the cat, but it would be bad ass.

3. Ruby says something positive about Blake and Yang’s relationship. Mainly to piss off everyone making ‘Ruby is homophobic’ memes.

4. We get Yang and/or Blake teasing Weiss about Jaune, maybe one of them asking her if he’s still ‘mature’ enough for her, and Weiss being flustered and embarrassed.

5. As team RWBY and Jaune leave, we get scenes of the Afterans going about their lives. The Genial Gems building a new home, the market place being repaired, Jinxy peddling more items, the Hunter mice catching a snake, that kind of thing.

6. Red Like Roses part 3 for Ruby’s epic arrival at the climax of the fight vs the cat.

That’s everything I can think of, at least for now. I’m sure five minutes after I post this I’ll have four more things to add to the list XD

[circular-bircular]

I am not going to tell you to stop, because I get what you have been saying, but what point is there to interacting with Sophie? What do you think is going to come out of this? They really do not care for anything you have to say and are solely going to just attack you and paint you in a bad image regardless of what you say. You could make the best point and be completely right, and they will still find a way to demonize and attack you. The cycle is never ending. I don't understand where this is supposed to end and when you are supposed to start feeling safe and happy with their constant aggression fueled by attention. Does this really make you feel safer and more stable? Do you have an end goal in sight?

(Sophie uses she/her pronouns, rather than they/them!)

Yes actually, I do have a goal in sight. Remarkably, it doesn’t even revolve around her.

See, I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but for quite some time, I did my best to not even mention her name or do anything at all relating to Sophie. Instead, I let her spread lies and vitriol about me and the spaces I was in, and consequently, people began to listen to and repeat those lies. And yet, I continued to ignore them, because “well, would interacting with her really spark joy?”

Obviously not. Interacting with Sophie does not, in any way, make me feel safer or more stable.

But it makes me feel a lot safer and a lot more stable than just ignoring the vitriol people praise her for, or the lies she spreads about me and my friends.

The issue is, we’ve tried deplatforming via ignoring. Everyone I knew, beyond a small handful, completely ignored her, or worked hard to. The spaces I’m in literally had rules about not engaging with her. Some still do! And sadly, that hurt me more, because I allowed myself to believe that being upset and angry about those things was destabilizing me.

My posts really aren’t for her. I know nothing I’ll say will ever change her mind, because she has already picked out who I am to her: to her, I’m a member of a hate group who is masquerading as someone they’re not. I’ve stopped caring what she sees me as — but when her followers call me a bitch because I keep “attacking” her, when all I did was make a post explaining my disgust at her reaction? I want to clarify, for my sake, and for those who aren’t knowledgeable about the topic and have to make an opinion.

The posts aren’t for her. They’re for me, and the people who come to my blog due to her vague posting about me constantly. Because I DO get a lot of folks coming to my blog due to what she posts about the “so called pro-endo sysmed.” And before, when I refused to let myself use my own damn blog as an outlet for my own opinions, when I kept it all bottled up — people just saw me never clarifying any of that vitriol. They could walk away still assuming the worst.

Now, I can clarify my perspective. Will she still lie about what’s happening and constantly twist my words? Absolutely. But now I am no longer as distressed about it, because I know my truth is out there, and they can see that I try to spread respect, love, and positivity.

That says a lot more about my character than hers.

Again — I love that you’re trying to ensure that people are being healthy and taking care of themselves in this space. That’s a good thing. But ask yourself honestly: do I seem triggered right now? Do I seem like engaging with her content is actively actually making me less stable?

Last night, I realized I was a little messed up about it, and then I made a post showing I was messed up before then stepping away. This morning, I saw an ask, judged myself to be okay enough to make a response, and did so. I’m feeling wonderful at the moment, in all honesty.

It’s not better to keep it all bottled up. I understand that now.

[destinyc1020]

I’ll bite. I’m a Z fan who likes her with Tom now. Initially I can’t lie, I was glad she was with JE or even the rumors about JDW. Tom felt like such a school boy, bouncing everywhere and Z was moving into her “adult” era, JE seemed to compliment that more serious and artistic vibe she had - and yea they looked better paired. Nowadays while I like Tom some what I will admit that sometimes he still seems very young boy compared to her woman which isn’t helped by the height. On my worst opinion days it feels like he is far behind in every category.

Thank you Anon for your honesty. I'm glad you're at least being HONEST lol. 😂

I'm pretty sure that's probably how a LOT of Z fans feel (or USED to feel at some time) tbh. 🤷🏾‍♀️ I really think some ppl have some really warped views of celebrities or smthg lol. 🥴

I think ppl make judgements when they don't really know someone on the public eye, and the judgments are usually negative until they get to know MORE about the person. I'll admit, I've been guilty of it too! 🤷🏾‍♀️

But once I've spent more time in someone's fandom, and get to know more about them (either through fans, fan encounters, or just their interviews and whatnot), my view of them starts to change..... usually for the positive. 😌

With Tom, I personally feel like he CAN be serious? I've seen him be serious before. I mean, he's the son of a comedian for goodness sakes lol, so he's going to have jokes and a sense of humor, and I think Zendaya LOVES that about him! 😂

I actually don't think she would like being with a guy who's TOO serious or uptight... 👀 I know I personally wouldn't. I prefer light-hearted, EASY-going guys. No drama or up and down attitudes for me please no. I dated a guy who was like that (up and down all the time) and it was a nightmare 🥴 I was so attracted to him, but in the end, he was just a downer! I vowed never to be with a guy like that ever again lol. I can't do the up and down rollercoaster, or guys who take themselves TOO seriously. 🥴

I think that's why I didn't really think that she and Big Foot were a good match. He just always seemed like he took himself TOO seriously, and was always on a foul mood lol 😆 Now, I could be totally WRONG and way off base about him, but that's just the VIBE that he puts out to me. Idk the dude personally, so again my perception could be way off base, and I'm perfectly happy to admit that. 🤷🏾‍♀️

Z is def in her "grown woman" era, but I think that Tom is in his "grown man" era as well now. Women DO mature faster than guys lol... But hey, sometimes opposites attract! 😃 You don't want someone TOO much like you lol. That's kinda boring? You want a guy/person who can teach you things, make you look at things differently, open you up, allow you to be completely YOURSELF. One thing about Tom is that he's very confident in himself, and he is just who he is regardless. 🤷🏾‍♀️ That's a very attractive trait. I'm sure that allows her to be 100% herself as well! 😌

I just don't understand why ppl police us black women and who we find attractive so much! It's ANNOYING!! 😤🥴 Leave us alone my gosh lol. 😂 Everyone's always got an opinion on who we like, date, smash, or find attractive. 😒 Even in the black community! Like, can't we just LIVE and love in PEACE?? Geez! Let us thirst in peace please lol 😆

I think Z is with the right guy for her who makes her "the happiest"! 🥰❤