#but i wanna let ‘those’ anons simmer down a bit lol

[nucrests]

I had a few people ask me to turn my anons back on because there’s people who want to send me positive asks and send me love! Trust me, I really do appreciate that and I love that!! But it’s so hard for me to be comfortable with that considering the amount of disrespect I’ve been getting lately 🙁

[chdarling]

I just finished TLE and I’m in love, thank you so much for your beautiful writing! I had a random fun characterization Q, but no worries if you don’t wanna answer! For our 4 Marauders and Lily: what do you hc they’d each be like at an amusement park? Not sure if the wizarding world has those, but in any case, do you think the gang would like extreme roller coasters if they had the chance to ride them? Or would some of them refuse to ride or be secretly nervous on them? 😁

oh my god, anon, you have no idea the wormhole this message sent me down ���

See, this reminded me rather forcefully of a plot line from a long, LONG time ago (like, a decade ago, back when TLE was nothing more than a few scribbled scenes I kept in a word doc in a secret folder on my school laptop LOL), in which James came to apologize to Lily over the summer after 5th year but it just so happened to be the week that the Cokeworth Fun Fair came to town and oh no circumstances happened and James has to attend with Lily and then it turns into a slight fake dating situation due to a Muggle boy who has been aggressively pursuing a thoroughly disinterested Lily and so they pretend that James goes to some elite boarding school and studies theoretical physics (“No one will ask questions,” Lily explains), and all in all James has a great time even though he’s tragically bad at bumper cars and also deeply baffled by the goldfish prizes and then eventually they have a Soft Moment™ by the carousel as the fun fair is dying down and Lily asks him why he isn’t nice like this at school? and James is all “because I’m stupid?” and they have a heart to heart and Lily is like oh no why am I feeling things I’m not supposed to do that.

And just in case you think I’m making this up:

They stopped to watch the carousel go around again, though this time there was no one riding it and it looked rather lonesome.

“So what do you think of your first muggle funfair?” asked Lily, leaning against the back of a stall, watching the ornate horses go round and round.

“Fascinating,” said James enthusiastically, and Lily laughed. “Although I’m still confused about the goldfish. And physics.”

Maybe it was the strange quiet of the closing festival or that continuously discomfiting feeling of two distinct parts of her life colliding, but something compelled Lily to turn to James and say, “How come you’re not nice like this at school?” The moment she said it she wished she hadn’t, and she looked hastily at the ground, her cheeks burning.

James was quiet for a moment. “Because I’m an idiot,” he said finally.

None of this is in TLE. Not even a little bit. 😂 But after your message sparked this long-repressed memory I was like “I must find this immediately,” and I went hunting through all my old files to the oldest of the old. I keep literally everything, so there it was, lurking under a folder helpfully titled “old” — but my god let me tell you, reading your own writing from a decade ago is…humbling. 🙈🙈🙈

But while for the most part this reread was a painful endeavor for me, what was really interesting is that some of the dialogue is very clearly an early precursor to bits that made it into the TLE2 draft. Like, so far removed from this very specific, bizarre scenario, but the bones of the conversation are the same. (Not the one above lol). Sometimes I forget how long this silly story has been simmering in my brain!!!

Anyway, this hasn’t answered your question at all, but it evoked such a weirdly specific memory that I had to go on a giant tangent 😂

As far as head canons for the Marauders: Sirius is obviously super into near-death experiences via rollercoaster, James is going to do anything Sirius dares to, even if he’s secretly a little unsure about these wobbly Muggle devices, Peter tags along but ends up getting sick, Remus abjectly refuses (“I feel plenty nauseous on my own without external help, thanks”) and instead explores the wonders of fair food (also leading to nausea, but oh well). Lily likes the fair games best because she beats James handily every time, despite his increasingly desperate attempts to win her a giant teddybear. Sirius accidentally wins a goldfish and is distraught because he is in no way emotionally prepared to be a parent.

And with that I will see myself out. 🤡

[anonymous0writer]

I Wanna Be Yours II JJ Maybank

Author: @anonymous0writer​

Requested: Yes!

“I love you songfics, can you do another one with JJ, but this time with the song "I wanna be yours" by Arctic Monkeys?“

Warnings: Nothing. Maybe one swear word and a tiny bit of smoking..

A/N: Ahhh, I love writing angst :) lol I hope you like this anon!!

Tags: @jayjaymaebank @rudys-pankow @maaybanks @everydayimfangirling @outrbank @thelocalpogue @decap-quadrant @ahhireallydontknow @never-ever-too-many-fandoms @kylosleftbuttcheek @insanitysparkles @divcrdown @youfookendonut @dpaccione​ @outerbanksbro  @jjs-housekeeping​ @teenwaywardasgardian​ @traumaflavouredjuulpod @magnuolia @sarapage89 @emsma11 @bxbyyyjocelyn​ @teamnick​ @jjmbanks​ @thesurfingsnail @lulubutton34​ @obxsummer​ @katiaw2​ @poguecollins​ @notaninstagrammodel​ @danicarosaline​ @timmyswrld​ @gmwlover100​ @koufaxx @bellaguarneri​ @diverrdown​ @drewswannabegirl​ @lordsagittarius​

Lyrics look like this

I wanna be your vacuum cleaner Breathing in your dust …. You call the shots babe I just wanna be yours

Day faded around you, the heavy cloak of the starry night falling around you swiftly, enveloping you in nightfall. The only bright light in the blanket of darkness was the flickering flames of the dying fire. The orange wisps of flame licked the sky in a desperate attempt to get free. It crackled and popped as embers floated around you, light little fireflies in the night. They danced around your legs and lit up the sand under your bare feet. Laughter and cheers filled the air, heavy and intoxicated. 

Five teens sat around the fire, the flames casting weird shadows dancing over their sun-kissed skin. Their faces were split into wide, drunk joy and eyes lighting up with the intoxicated haze of awe. You stood at the edge of the coals, them shining brightly back up at you, furious in their simmering. The dark, burnt coals and the pure heat of deep oranges and angry reds fuming under them. The sight was intimidating, but you, with your determined eyes and drunken mind were quite a force to be reckoned with. Your breath caught and your eyes zoned in on the end point. Your finger curled into a fist and you drew a deep breath before you darted forward. 

Bare skin danced over the smoldering coals. They were fast but not fast enough, the sizzle of burned skin and the flash of white-hot pain in your feet sent you farther over the coals. Dancing painfully but carefully, picking your way rapidly over the fiery embers. And then you were done. Hurting feet finding haven in the cool, soft sand, digging. Your pent up breath escaping your lips and your eyes betraying the hurt coursing through your blood. But the whoop you let out masked the hurt, adrenaline still strong in your veins.

JJ’s cerulean eyes found yours, both a calming feeling and a stir of wild chaos releasing in your chest. The feelings were weird in their own right, but JJ had both of them spilling in your chest. He lit you up in ways that scared the living shit out of you. The butterflies in your stomach were stomped out as you broke the eye contact. You didn’t like the feeling the butterflies brought. It was almost like heaving on an empty stomach over the toilet, alcohol trying to leave your system. You knew what the butterflies meant, and that's exactly what made you turn the boy away time and again. 

Feelings weren’t your forte, never mind love or falling for someone. And no matter how much you didn’t want it or were terrified of it, you were pretty sure- as much as you could be- that you were falling for JJ Maybank. And you didn’t want any part in it.

JJ’s lips turned down slightly, his dimples fading from his skin, the only sign that he was upset. He craved your attention and the ways your eyes seemed heavier than any other gaze. He loved the way you laughed, eyes lighting and your nose wrinkling. He loved the way you talked, slower, but intense enough to have you on the edge of your chair even if you’re talking about your day. He loved your attitude, and the way you walked and the way you laughed at his comments. He loved everything about you. He loved you.

You whooped, the calls breaking the silence of the night. Soon all five of you were screaming and cheering, the screams erupting into the air. The fire seemed to glow brighter at the fierce calls of happiness. 

JJ grinned and screamed along with you, but his eyes were rapt on you. He loved that out of all of them- even him- that you were only one brave enough to run across the smoldering coals. He loved how you matched him in so many ways. Crazy thoughts and wild actions. Unfiltered mouths, reckless behavior. 

JJ’s joy was muted by the memory of your refusal of his kiss. His lips quirked down as the muscle in his jaw flickered. He finally cast his eyes down, now focusing intently on the fire. He just wanted you. He wanted to be allowed to love you and have you love him back. He wanted you to love him. And he wanted so badly to be yours. 

Secrets I have held in my heart Are harder to hide than I thought Maybe I just wanna be yours I wanna be yours, I wanna be yours Wanna be yours, wanna be yours, wanna be yours

It was hard, harder than you could imagine. The thoughts roared in your mind and your fear was huddled in the cavity of your chest and your throat was clogged with unsaid words.

JJ was sitting in front of you, bruised knuckles and scabbing fingers laced together, mouth pulled into a thin line, his usual bright eyes dulled by the weight of your silence. 

“I-” You started, the words catching in your throat and your breath getting stolen. 

JJ’s eyes flicker up to meet yours, brief and embarrassed. Embarrassed yet again that his heart was out on his sleeve and you ignored it.

But you didn’t ignore it, you saw it and ached at the sight, but you couldn’t bring yourself to answer the desperate call for love. You looked down, unable to even catch a glimpse of the boy before you. But his scent filled your nose, evading your senses. Sea salt and a hint of weed wrapping you in a warm hug. 

You felt like sobbing. Words tangled in your chest, choking you. It hurt to know that this boy was loving you like he’d loved nothing else and you were too scared to reciprocate, but not giving him the words he needed to hear and understand was even worse. 

“I’m sorry,” The words flow past the barricade of the others, moving easily and spilling out of your throat. 

You hate the words once they hand in the air. Hate that they sound fake and forced. And that that’s the only thing that will pass through your lips. You hate the fact that those two words are the most used and overused. And empty. After a while, the words lose their feeling, yet that seems like the only thing you can say.

JJ’s throat bobs. His eyes are stinging and he feels like he’s about to lose it. Either to break something or scream. JJ runs a shaking hand through his hair. It happens every time. JJ comes to you, grin wide, eyes bright and heart clear as day on his sleeve. You ignore it, terror and sorrow closing your throat. His eyes dimming like a light flicked off, and his smile fading from his lips like a ghost. And then you are left to cover up the reopened wound and desperately fail. Just like every other time. And this time is no different. 

So why does it still hurt like barbed wire tightening around your heart when the boy stands and leaves? Why does it feel like the sun has passed behind a cloud, leaving goosebumps erupting on your skin, chills running down your spine and leaving you in the cold shadow of it’s ghost? Why does it feel like your heart is breaking at the same time as your shoulders sag in relief?

And let me be the portable heater that you'll get cold without I wanna be your setting lotion (I wanna be) Hold your hair in deep devotion (how deep?) At least as deep as the Pacific Ocean I wanna be yours

JJ was left cold and alone. Chills settling deep into his bones, not leaving any time soon. A dark moody cloud of regret and heartbreak hovering over the boy. He felt as if he was dancing in the rain, not caring if he got soaked to the bone, the chill entering his body that never left and went inside, unable to warm up or shake off the darker feeling roiling in his gut. And he was left alone. Without Kie and her worried eyes and supportive words asking- no, begging- him to move on. No John B. to clap his back, say his condolences and offer a beer. Even Pope was absent, his wise words and his weak attempts at the joke like a familiar sight.

And of course, you weren’t there, which felt like a slap in the face. Like when it was so cold outside, it made your skin numb, but the slap of skin against skin had his face stinging. He gritted his teeth, trying to ease the pain that seemed almost physical, with the blunt. The half-assed rolled blunt sat loose in his hands. Part of JJ didn’t want to numb himself from the high of the drugs but the other screamed at him. And hey, if it eased it for at least a while, it was worth it. Right? 

Smoke escaped from his lips and the boy was soaring. Cloud Nine looked pretty good from where JJ sat. A small laugh escaped his lips as his eyelashes fluttered against his cheek.

Memories that were more dreams and hopes of the future came to life from the depths of his mind. They came forward and erupted with color and life. Your laugh rang through his ears as you curled into his chest, his fingers brushing through your hair. 

He could feel everything as if his senses were heightened. The silky smoothness of your long locks of hair, the brush of sunlight against your skin, highlighting your eyes. Making them look like pools of gems, shining and paler. He could feel the shift of his shirt as you snuggled against him. The rising and falling of your chest and the soft sound of your breathing hanging in the air. Every detail of the moment blared at him, jarring him into another ‘memory’. 

You danced in front of him, dressed in a white bikini with flowers patterned onto the fabric. Your figure became smaller as your feet carried you to the ocean, giggling and water spraying your legs as you crashed into the serene waters. 

A soft gasp escaped the boy as his pale eyes blinked rapidly, clearing away the cobwebs of the dreams. 

“Jesus,” JJ mutters, hand running over his face. But the only thing in his mind is you. I want to be yours. 

[borhapstyles]

Home (Lucy Boynton x Reader)

Happy birthday to this beautiful woman. Lucy’s made all our lives better, and I couldn’t be more grateful. In honor of her birthday, I wrote this imagine for her that combined these headcanon requests that I got;

“Lucy... Like you're best friends and you come out to her as bi (or whatever you wanna write) and one thing leads to another and boom! cute couple !!” -anon

“Hi if you’re still taking requests for headcanons um please bless us with a Lucy proposal because I’m iN LOVE with that goddess and I just want to cry about it a little harder thank you I love you bye” -anon

“oooh! what about some headcanons for proposing to lucy?“ -anon

Warnings: Fluff, allusion to smut <3  Word Count: 4.2k **If you sent me a headcanon request, know that I’ll get to it soon! Thank you so so much for all of them by the way, I’ve never written so much in such a short period lol but you guys push me to do that and I couldn’t be happier. This was my first girl x girl imagine, so I hope it’s alright! I put a lot of love in this so enjoy xx

—

Lucy. Lucy Boynton. 

In your eyes, the most beautiful person in the world and of course, the one who’s stolen your heart. She lies beside you in a domestic state, hair partially tied up to keep wispy hairs out of her eyes. Her face is bare from any sort of make up as she never quite felt the need to be so jazzed up when she’s around you, she’s said it herself. She breathes peacefully as the film you chose unfolds on her TV. 

You love her home. It’s little bits and pieces of herself that have come together to make Lucy’s flat. Little things you helped her pick out when choosing to decorate, other things you knew she had just thrown there in an effort to make things feel more like her own.

And you want to tell her, you so desperately want to scream out that you had grown these feelings for her that have nestled in between each nook and cranny of your heart, that you can’t bear a life without her and that she must know that you love her.

But something bites at you, the harsh reality that perhaps if you aren’t careful, if you aren’t sure, then you might lose Lucy all together. 

With curious eyes, she turns to you. You feel a wave of nerves come about you as she gazes at you.

“Y/N?” Lucy’s sweet voice pokes at you. You gently swivel your head around, a small smile settling on your lips. 

“Yeah?”

“Are you okay?” She chortles, lips parted as she blinks at you. “You seem ages away, love.”

Love. You know the terms of endearment are natural to her tongue, she would throw them on anyone she was close to. But your heart perks up just a bit because she always seemed to use them on you.

You examine her visage closely. With her pink lips and glittering eyes, lashes longer than life, you believed she held the whole world. The tendrils of her hair that do manage to fall on her face only make you chuckle, as you know in a minute she’d push them away with slight frustration. 

Lucy is beautiful, both inside and out. The heart of a warrior with the soul of an angel. And she is all that seems to occupy your brain.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” is all you reply with, a sigh escape your body.

But Lucy knows you like the back of her hand and she doesn’t believe a word of it. 

“No, really. What’s wrong? You’ve been distracted all day and I want to help if I can.” 

For a moment you think perhaps today is the day. Now is the moment, it’s reaching out to you with stretched arms, hoping you’ll latch on and take it.

You know you’ll have to tread lightly on the situation. One big revelation at a time, in front of her. 

The topic of sexuality was never one that quite came up simply because you both never felt the need to label or justify yourselves to each other. Everything came natural, everything was accepted. And you were always certain of yourself, until she came along and confirmed any lingering thoughts you had. 

Lucy Boynton, coming in to steal your heart and confirm your bisexuality to the highest degree. 

Who knew you’d get this far, really. With all the hours you spent with her shopping or running through her lines, all the times she gave you a long hug and stayed up late to chat with you about everything in between because she knew you needed it, despite her saying she just wanted to. It took a lot out of you to pretend you didn’t want to kiss her most of the time. 

The lines always were a bit blurred anyways. You didn’t want to assume anything of anyone, and perhaps it was simply in her nature to be touchy, to be so outwardly friendly all the time.

Perhaps today is the day. You think again to yourself. Part of you is wondering why you’ve become so terrified at the thought. You knew that if there was anyone to entrust your feelings with, it was Lucy. Even if she didn’t feel the same way, she would still know how to let you down gently, and that seemed better than secretly hoping someday she’d come forward. 

“I-I,” You stumble, anxiety reaching you as it all becomes much more real. There’s no turning back once you tell her. 

“You know you can tell me anything.” Lucy whispers. She places a hand on your forearm, rubbing it ever so gently. “I don’t want to force anything out of you if you don’t want to but please don’t feel alone in whatever it is you want to say.”

You gulp, knowing if you don’t tell her now, you might never. 

“I’ve been thinking about this a lot, and I’ve really only become certain of it recently, but...” You fix your eyes on the polish of her nails, the two rings she always wore and hope it isn’t the last time you’ll see them.

Lucy parts her lips, nervous about the news you’d present to her. You were her best friend and she would lose it at the notion of losing you.

“I’m bisexual, Lucy.” You want to say it firmly but part of you is afraid of your own voice. 

You watch her carefully for a moment, flicking your eyes up to search hers for any truth.

A grin breaks out onto her lips and relief comes crashing down onto you. “You are?” She asks gently and you nod.

“Y/N, that’s amazing that you know, I’m so glad you’ve discovered more of yourself!” Lucy bubbles over enthusiastically. “H-How did you know, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“I, uhm.” Oh shit. You think. Please don’t ask for details when I tell you this story, please don’t.

“Well there’s this girl, I found her lovely from the moment that I met her. And when I got to know her, I realised her personality was even more wonderful.” You utter, swallowing harshly in hopes that somehow, she might catch the hint.

Lucy tugs her arm away, hoping you won’t notice but you do. You suddenly feel all the nerves rushing back and hope it wasn’t a mistake to tell her.

Your voice is shaky as you speak but you don’t stumble as you talk from your heart. “She’s beautiful, the most beautiful person I know. And when I’m with her, I just know everything is going to be alright. She makes me so happy to be alive.” 

“Oh wow,” She says. “you sound like you love her. Does she know?”

“No, she doesn’t. I’m not even sure if she likes girls in that way.”

“Well she sounds amazing.” She replies curtly, and you can’t help but follow a trace of jealousy that’s faint in her voice but it’s there. 

“She is.” You say. “I’m not quite sure how to tell her though.” 

Lucy’s eyes flicker away and to the wall, at the artwork you helped her buy. She was on the fence about it whilst at the gallery but you told her you loved it and she made the purchase soon after. She hasn’t told you yet but she’s so happy she bought it because it brings her comfort in times like this. 

“Do I know her?”

“Yes, I’d say so.” You chuckle. 

“Oh, well,” Lucy swallows before licking her lips. “I think anyway you decide to tell her, it’ll be perfect because you’re incredible Y/N and you deserve all the happiness. Really, she should be lucky to have your heart because-”

“Lucy.” You stop her, this time taking her arm. You inhale sharply, now or never.

"What?” She bites, the green-eyed monster now ferociously standing in front of you. She thinks she’s hiding it but well but she can’t in the face of you, she can’t hide much really. You gain courage now at the sight of her jealousy, knowing even if she doesn’t feel the same way, there was a large part of her that cared. 

“It’s you, Lucy.”

Her jaw drops as her eyelashes bat feverishly. She lets out a short breath, almost like a gasp, but not quite. 

“Me?” Lucy’s voice is high, the voice of disbelief. “You love me?”

“I do.” You almost laugh, feeling a weight lift off your shoulders. “I love you. And it’s okay if you don’t feel the same way, I just needed to tell you.”

Your eyes are fixed on her as she bites her lip, blinking at the tea set out on the coffee table. You came by earlier with a box of her favorite as she told you she had run out. 

“Lucy?” You prod at her. She opens her mouth for a moment before closing it.

In a split second, she lunges forward at you, pressing her soft lips against yours. Lucy kisses you fervently, as if she’s never quite kissed before but now that she has, it’s all she wants to do. Her supple lips move against yours, tongue peeking inside your mouth to explore.

After a few minutes, you both pull away. You can’t stop the grin that breaks out onto your face as she holds your head against hers, fingers stroking your hair lightly.

“I love you too.” Lucy utters, a laugh simmering out as the two of you realise you both loved each other but were just too scared to say it.

-

Following the confession is pure bliss. 

You and Lucy adjusted to the couple life rather smoothly. As it turns out, all those moments when you wanted to kiss her, she wanted to you to do so as well. Her lingering embraces, her staying up to speak with you, all because she wanted to hear your voice. Lucy also wanted to be near you and she couldn’t go without you.

It was rather casual, when the two of you decided to go public. You were both strolling through the streets of London, her arm around you as you went from shop to shop. Photographs spread all around, but it wasn’t until you moved to kiss her that everyone was certain.

And the world was supportive, to say the least. They couldn’t get enough of you and Lucy together despite a few harsh critics. But you paid them no mind. 

The Bo Rhap fandom was especially supportive as the people who were also LGBTQ members found it comforting to have such role models around.

The Bo Rhap gang themselves had called it apparently. They had a running bet going of when you two would finally get together, to which you both just laughed it off.

“I was getting tired of waiting.” Joe said to you both once afternoon at lunch. “We were just waiting for the day one of you guys would say it.”

“Was it really that obvious?” Lucy asked. A chorus of “yes’s” filled the room. You only tugged her closer and smiled.

And so began the domestic days and nights with Lucy. The days when you’d both wake up, perhaps make love, then head for breakfast downstairs if not to a trendy London cafe. You had moved into her flat just a couple months later, although you practically lived there with how much of your stuff was there just from being her best friend.

On the days you both had off, you would go exploring somewhere in the city. Concerts and shopping were even more fun now that you could hold her and she, you.

You loved every second with her, and she, you.

Most days, after dinner and perhaps before reading or throwing on a film, you and her would dance gently into the night. 

With her record player, you’d pick out a vinyl and take her into your arms, swaying to the low music that played. Lucy would kiss your neck and tell you how lucky she is to have you.

Your ideal date, however, came one afternoon when Lucy strolled through to your shared bedroom, finding you on your laptop. She sat by the edge near your feet, laying a hand on your leg and smiling.

“Have you got any plans for tonight?”

You rolled your eyes, a gentle laugh coming out of you. “I mean, besides be with you? No, not really.”

“Well, I’ve got plans for us, so get dressed and we’ll head out, yeah?” She grinned like a child who had just received candy. 

“Okay.” You giggled. “May I ask where we’re going?”

“Nope!” She popped, heading into the bathroom.

An hour later, you found yourself in Primrose Hill with Lucy, a picnic blanket set up along with a basket full of yours and her favorite snacks. The sky was an gradient pink and orange, just as the sun was saying goodbye for the day.

“This is perfect.” You sighed, leaning into her chest. Her legs were stretched out and tangled with yours, palms out to hold yourselves up.

“You like it here?” She inquired and you nodded. “I know how stressed you were about work so I thought I’d bring you here for a day, just to remind you to breathe and how beautiful things can still be, even when you feel like shit.” 

You can’t help but bask in her beauty as she looks to you, ever radiant in the glow of the setting sun. You two were only together for six months, but considering your friendship, it’s felt like years. In a good way, however, because you fell more and more in love with Lucy each day.

Lucy’s cheeks grew crimson, still conscious of your eyes on her. You pushed a blonde curl out of her face and tuck it behind her ear.

Sweet gestures such as the one she prepared for you that day reminded you of just how much power she had over your heart. You couldn’t live without her, not that you’d ever want to. Now that Lucy was in your life, it’s never quite been the same, but it’s changed for the better.

And that’s when you knew you wanted her around forever. 

- 

One Year Later 

“Luc?” Your voice pings through the flat after hearing keys rattle, followed by the front door opening.

“I’m home, love!” She calls out. You shuffle into the hallway, meeting her halfway to greet her with a kiss.

“Hi.” You whisper and she smiles. “Good day on set?”

“Yeah, for the most part.” Lucy sighs. The two of you stroll through to the kitchen, but not before she stops to greet your pet cat.

“What went wrong?” You frown at her words whilst reaching into the cupboard to pull out a bag of her favorite tea.

“It’s just,” She pauses. She takes a seat at the breakfast bar, resting her head into her palms. Your heart aches at the sight of her so upset. “I couldn’t get all my lines together for some reason, and I felt so embarrassed because I was in front of Emma fucking Thompson and I kept fucking up.”

You stride over and wrap your arms around her, pulling her in as you feel her break down. Lucy was always one to keep up a front in the face of everyone else but with you she could be anyone or anything she wanted to be. And right now she wanted to be sad, so you let her just for a bit.

“Lucy, baby,” You say gently. She holds onto you tighter, breathing in once more before glancing up at you.

“I don’t even know why I’m doing all this, I don’t even think people on that set like me as much.”

You shake your head. You weren’t going to allow her to feel any bit of regret or self-loathing, not as long as you were around to try and fix it.

“You are one of the most talented actresses I know, and I know a lot of them because you’ve introduced me to them.” You remark and she giggles, ever so softly. “And if there’s anything I know, it’s that acting’s what your meant to do, my love. I see you when you’re on set, when you’re on the screen and so do other people otherwise you wouldn’t have that role in the first place.”

Lucy sniffles as she takes in your words. She gulps, blinking at you sweetly with tears still pooling around her eyes.

“Not every cast and crew is going to be like the one on Bo Rhap but you know what? All of us are still here and we believe in you. I believe in you, Luc. And I just know that this one bad day is not going to mean anything when you’re up there willing your Oscar or Golden Globe for best supporting actress.”

“Bold of you to assume I’ll get that far.” She retorts, causing both of you to laugh.

“I know you will.” You take her chin into your hand, rubbing the supple skin tenderly. “I love you, Lucy. So fucking much, and I know you’re capable of the most incredible things.”

Now crying, Lucy moves to kiss you, salty tears between both your lips as she does so. Though she’s not crying out of grief, but out of pure gratitude for you.

And that’s when she just knows she wants you around forever,

-

Six Months Later 

Your two year anniversary with Lucy was one you both moved mountains around to make sure you had free. 

This year, you were in charge of planning the anniversary as Lucy did your one year (and rather spectacularly at that.) She had flown the both of you out to the French Riviera for a week, where a lot of it was spent in each others arms, whether it be in bed or on the beach. It was a trip you could only dream of, and she made it come true.

Now, this year, Lucy could not unfortunately a week off due to her next project, but that wasn’t any bother to you when you planned the day out. Butterflies filled your stomach everytime you thought about it despite everyone’s reassurance that it was going to go fabulously. 

But everyone gets nervous at the thought of a proposal, who wouldn’t, right?

You employed the help of Joe, along with another mutual friend you were both close with in order to pick the ring. The Bo Rhap boys were absolutely buzzing when you told them, Ben and Joe even shared a look once you said it.

“I know, I know. You both called it, right?” You rolled your eyes at them.

“Yeah, that’s what it was.” Rami said in a sarcastic voice. You chose to ignore the slight suspicion bubbling inside you and moved forward with your plans.

You planned the whole thing meticulously, as you wanted to be able to capture the moment but you also wanted Lucy to be surprised up until it happened. That’s when you asked Gwil and Allen, perhaps the more secretive of the bunch, to help film the whole thing so that you could look back on it later.

Which brings you to the present day, your actual anniversary. The morning began with lots of sex, of course, and if anyone were to walk by your home they’d truly think a porno was being filmed there. Lucy was fantastic in bed, by the way. Always willing to fill your needs and then some, but could also be very dominating if she wanted to. Just how you liked it.

Following the love-making was lunch, in which you both prepared each others’ favorites. An exchange of small gifts, where Lucy bought you concert tickets to your favorite band and a necklace. You smirked to yourself at the other jewellery that would hopefully be given that day. You gave her two photo albums, the first with pictures throughout your two years together, plus little captions for each one of them. The second one, however, was blank, and she looked at you with furrowed brows.

You only smiled and told her it was to fill with future adventures and memories together, following your two years. She only kissed you harder afterwards.

And now, with Lucy is still in the shower as you check on everything you’ve packed for the day, you eye on the ring inside your bag once more. You breathe out heavily, feeling the same level of anxiety as you did that first night when you confessed to her. However, it’s a different sort. The kind that is, please-spend-forever-with-me-i-might-die-if-you-say-no sort.

Once you’re both ready, you hop into the car and make your way throughout London. She squeezes your hand gently, excitement filling her at the thought. You had been rather secretive about the actual day’s events and she was curious, to say the least. 

The day is filled with exploration, going through cute little neighborhoods of London that you perhaps haven’t seen, taking photos of each other and wandering into little book shops and record stores. Although this was something you could normally do, it filled Lucy with joy because it was her favorite thing to do and despite all the craziness she experiences with her fame, it grounded her, being normal with you.

Afterwards, once you notice the day is winding down, you take her back to the car and begin driving towards Primrose Hill.

A smile creeps onto Lucy’s face as she thinks back to that afternoon when she brought you there. She was a sucker for nostalgic things, and today was full of them.

You arrive and pull out the same picnic basket, Lucy now having a sense of what was to happen. She helps you set up and sighs contently once plopped down onto the blanket.

Lucy lies in your arms, humming a song ‘39 by Queen whilst toying with your fingers. It was the same song you two had danced around to last night in the living room.

“All your letters in the sand cannot heal me like your hand...” She trails off and you take your hand into hers.  

“Today was perfect.” She later says, accent heavy and you know she’s a bit worn out from the day. You hum softly, reaching over to pop some fruit into your mouth before feeding her one.

The sky, now a blend of pink and orange, reminds you so dearly of that afternoon Lucy took you out. Your palms begin to grow sweaty as you think to now ask her. 

You wave your head around before making eye contact with Gwil and Allen, who managed to look inconspicuous as they nod at you, everything in place. If they weren’t careful enough, they’d end up looking like creeps trying to film you two and you giggle at the thought of someone calling them out for it.

“Lucy.” You utter firmly. She looks to you, eyes sparkling with delight. She never quite told you, but she adores hearing her name from your lips. 

“I think I’ve told you this before but I don’t say it enough. Whenever I look at you, I’m home, really. And no matter what terrible things life throws at me, I can just think of you and how much you mean to me and I know it’s all going to be okay.”

Your hands are unsteady as you reach into your bag, hand still covering the box. Lucy’s eyes are welling up and she can already sense what’s going to happen but allows you to continue.

“And two years ago today, when you told me that you felt the same, I just knew I could never let you go, darling.” Your fingers shakily open the box, revealing a ring which causes Lucy to gasp.

“Will you marry me, Lucy?”

“Yes, yes, I will marry you!” She shouts happily. You slip the ring onto her finger before she ardently kisses you, claps from surrounding people dispersing all around. 

Once pulled away, you glance at Gwil and Allen who throw you a “thumb’s up”, having caught the magical moment on camera. Lucy giggles at you whilst examining the ring.

“Oh my god, Y/N, this is perfect. It’s so beautiful, I love it so much.” She says before kissing you once more.

“You know,” She begins to laugh and you raise your brows at her. “I was actually going to propose to you and I was going to do it on your birthday next month.”

“No you weren’t.” You laugh, cheeks reddened at the thought.

“I was! I even told the boys and everything, I’m surprised they didn’t tell you once you told them.”

“So you have a ring for me then?” Lucy nods. “It’s back home, in the blue box on the top shelf, behind the other shoe boxes. I hid it away from everything.” 

The two of you laugh harder at the thought, you were rather perfect for each other in every sense. You couldn’t quite believe your fate, as just two years ago and perhaps the day before, you were fighting with yourself at the thought of telling Lucy how you truly felt about her, and yet two years later you’re engaged to her.

“You’re the love of my life.” You whisper, taking her hands in yours. She grins, massaging the back of your hand but only for a moment.

Lucy then moves her hands, clasping them around your head as she strokes your head gently. She lays a chaste kiss on your lips before pressing her forehead to yours, just as she did the first night you confessed to her.

“And you are mine.” 

—

This is the first time I’ve ever written a girlxgirl thing, so I do hope you enjoyed it. I’m bisexual myself so this was actually rather liberating and I myself loved doing it. Know that I’m always here to talk about anything, sexuality, personal issues, whatever, I’m here. I won’t ever judge and I’m just full of love, I promise! 

More Lucy things to come in the future, darlings. All my love xx

[thehomierobbstark]

What was the bomb Ramen recipe?

Aight BOOM I finally got a chance to answer your question so here it is! Thank you for being so patient anon:

To start, I use this video as a reference regarding cooking methods and ingredients/measurements

Here’s the printed instructions for the above video

I don’t follow it fully because I don’t have all the stuff/don’t feel like doin allat, but here’s what I do use:

*1 Tbsp. sesame seeds

*2 cloves garlic (minced or grated)

*½" ginger (grated)

*Scallion (white part, diced)

*2 tsp. sesame oil

*2 tsp. chili bean paste

*2 tsp. soy sauce

*1 cup rice milk [substituted for soy]

*½ tsp Kosher salt

*Dash of white pepper

I also use the following as a personal preference:

Star Anise seeds (about 3 per serving)

Brewed Noodle Dipping Broth (optional)

Fresh Corn cut off the cob (about 1 cup per serving)

Fresh Spinach (1-2 cups per serving)

Mushrooms (sliced; about ½ cup per serving)

Red Onion (some diced, some sliced [for texture difference])

Eggs (1 per serving)

[For the pictures below, since I’m familiar with this recipe the ingredients shown aren’t exact measurements, so don’t get worried if yours don’t match up. I didn’t use all the ingredients below, but also I was cooking for 3 people {for example I only used about half the ginger on the cutting board, but all the spinach, etc etc.} 

If its your first time cooking ramen/this recipe, I’d suggest going with the listed measurements for all the *starred* items until you get more comfortable with your personal taste/preference.]

Heres a few pictures of the ingredients I used, just in case you’re a visual person like myself or you also need an idea for what some of the items look like:

(That hunk of yellow in the middle is grated ginger)

(These are Star Anise seeds)

ALRIGHT! So you’ve got all your ingredients laid out and ready to go.

Starting with your sesame seeds, pour those into a small saucepan and toast them until they’re a nice golden brown. Make sure you start off with low heat because this can get away from you real fast, so stir them regularly every few seconds to keep them from burning.

As you can see above these kinda got away from me [😅] but I was comfortable with the toasted : semi- toasted ratio so I stopped several seconds after this point. Toasting the seeds helps to bring out the oils and flavor, and you can also throw the anise seeds in there at the end for a few seconds to get those a little toasted too if you like.

Now you’re gonna grind up the seeds. Don’t have a mortar and pestle? Cool! Me either! What you might have tho is an ice cream scoop and a mug, so throw that shit in there and get to grinding! (You can also use a ziploc bag and a rolling pin, but remember to let the seeds cool before you dump them in the bag or it’ll melt [yup. been there done that 😅] ).

(Unground sesame seeds)

Once you’ve got those ground up to your desired texture (mostly powdery is good, don’t feel it needs to be perfect you just wanna smash open a good amount of the seeds) start heating up your medium sized pot on low.

This would be the 1:18 mark in the video above, and you’re gonna follow the instructions as so up until 2:18.

Start with your sesame seed oil and let that heat up (only takes a few seconds). Then, dump in your garlic, ginger, and white parts of the scallions ( I call them green onions but whatever lmao) and let that cook for a lil until that shit starts smellin good (or until the white parts of the onion get a little translucent). You can play with your fire a little bit but sesame oil burns fast so try to keep it on the low side to keep your food and pot from burning.

Now, if you’re like me and adding red onion and mushroom too, you can add that in now to get those cookin. The mushrooms might soak up a bit of your oil so feel free to add a little more sesame oil and cook until your veggies are evenly coated. Don’t worry about the mushrooms not being thoroughly cooked yet cuz they’ll soak up the flavors of the broth and get cooked with the next few steps. Don’t forget to add in your sesame and anise seed powder now.

(Forgot to add the mushrooms here lol)

Feel free to turn your heat up to low medium at this point to get your pot headed in a nice simmering direction. Now, you’re gonna add your chili paste, soy sauce, and dipping broth (a quick splash is good enough) and stir that in nicely as well.  I suggest tasting all these ingredients before adding them so you have an idea of the spice and sodium content you’re working with, as well as the flavors. I like my food spicy and not too salty, so I use extra chili paste and low sodium soy sauce.

(Does not include soy sauce or dipping broth yet. Still no mushrooms XD)

The dipping broth I use has a little bit of a sweet flavor in it, so I keep that in mind to prevent from adding too much (if you’re using fresh corn the sweetness will also be heightened, tempting you to add more salt). All of the above ingredients have a good salt content tho, so be mindful of that if you need to watch your salt intake. Also! Taste as you go. That way if you need to add a little of anything you can add it in before you get to the finish line.

[You also may want to take a moment to start another pot of boiling water for your ramen noodles at this point.]

You can turn up your heat now to medium, because we’re about to add in the milk. The recipe above calls for soy milk, personally I use rice milk, but if you wanna use another non dairy milk, thats also great! (I’ve only used soy and rice milk tho so I can’t dictate what the taste may be like with another type of milk)

If you’re not fucking with non dairy milk (understandable lmao) see the substitutions I provided down below.

Add in your milk, stirring to blend all the flavors. You can pour half, stir a little, and pour the other half, or pour it all at once and stir, or pour little by little while stirring. The point is, it doesn’t matter how you do it, long as your pour the shit in there and stir it together 😂. Once you get that all mixed in nicely, you can turn your pot up to full medium or even a low high, to get it bubbling.

(A non bubbling but very delicious pot of broth)

The raw looking onion up there is just the leftover onion slices I added in for texture. At this point, I like to add a little salt and white pepper into my broth and give it a little taste test to see where its at. Sometimes I use a pinch of sea salt, sometimes just regular salt, it depends on what I feel like reaching for. They’re both the same to me, but again if you need to be mindful of your salt intake for personal or health reasons, you can go ahead n skip this step. I also add a few handfuls of fresh spinach to get that cooking down. ***Also don’t forget to add your corn in too!***

Check on your pot of boiling water, and if its ready, go ahead and add your noodles in.  Feel free to use whatever ramen noodles you want, be it Top Ramen, Neoguri, Maruchan, its all up to you. I used Shin Ramyun noodles, in case you’re curious. Cook the noodles as directed.

I don’t really use the flavor packets, because 1) ummm we just made some bomb ass homemade ramen broth SON!!! get that shit outta here 😤😤 but also 2) the salt content is out of this world, and as you keep hearing me say, you wanna keep an eye on that.

BUTTTT if you’re tasting your broth and you feel like maybe it could use a lil sum sum, sometimes I’ll add in a couple sprinkles of the flavor packet to give it a little extra spice and umph (the noodle packs up there are Gourmet Spicy), but I really don’t add much, maybe two amounts of whats shown in the spoon depending how many people I’m cooking for. (Maybe a little more if my grannys not looking lol)

I do however use the vegetable packet, so dump that in the broth too.

I’ll also crack an egg or two into the pot and let that get cooking. I don’t like the boiled runny yolk versions you’ll normally find in ramen, but I like eggs, so I like this much better. Its basically scrambled egg, just wet lol.

(The egg is the little flecks of yellow and white in the pot)

Try to prevent immediately stirring the egg once you crack it in the pot, otherwise you’ll get little baby disintegrated bits, which is okay, but if you want to taste good amounts of egg with the rest of your ingredients, try the following:

Let it sit for maybe half a minute after cracking (start by doing one egg at a time) then taking some wooden chopsticks, or a fork, and just mix back and forth through your broth. If you’re doing this while the pot is still boiling or on medium heat, it won’t take long for your egg to cook, so don’t get worried about the possibility of uncooked egg in the pot. Give it about 2 minutes, maybe a little more for comfort, and you’re good to go! Put your pot on low and let it simmer.

Go ahead and check on your noodles now, they should be done now or close to it. Once they are, drain the water out of the pot and set aside. Sometimes I forget this part, but you want to drain the water to keep the noodles from getting to the translucent/overcooked stage, unless thats your personal preference.

Now if you’re anything like me, you’re probably up there lookin at the last three photos like “woooow Homie, you out here providing ramen recipes but you aint providing the recipe for them potstickers you got goin in the back,”

First of all, mind ya bidness

Nosy ass….

Second of all, these from Trader Joes bruh!

They’re the Thai Shrimp Gyoza ones and they’re in the frozen section.  As you can see, I panfried them, using olive oil and sesame oil (like 1 tablespoon each) and these shits are bomb af. See? Don’t I be comin thru for yall?

But anyway, back to the ramen recipe.

NIGGA you done!! All you gotta do is plate your noodles in a bowl, ladle your broth in there, sprinkle your green onions on top, maybe add little sriracha and BOOM

Congratulations! You just made some bomb ass ramen homie!!!! (peep the panda chopsticks :D)

Now go put on your favorite show, kick back, and get to grubbin! 

Warning: You will absolutely knock tf out after devouring this shit, so clear a space and prepare for that lmao. Trust me, I do it every time 😂😂

////Substitutions////

For the Garlic, Ginger, and Onion, feel free to use the powder versions instead if you don’t have fresh on hand.

There is also sesame seed powder and, apparently, anise seed powder (don’t ask me where to find those two because ionknow)

Kosher Salt- as far as i’m concerned salt is salt, like I said I use regular or sea salt if you don’t have kosher

Rice or Soy Milk- If you wanna use dairy milk, I’d say start with half a cup of dairy and then half a cup of vegetable or chicken broth (low sodium versions are a thing). This will help make it creamy without compromising too much of the flavor you’ve built up. Again, taste as you go to tweak as needed.

Soy Sauce can of course be substituted for the low sodium kind.

Fresh Ingredients: For Corn, Spinach, Mushrooms and even Onions, Frozen or Canned works just as well and its a significantly cheaper option (idk bout canned onions tho). If you’re going the canned route, make sure to just rinse it out first before adding to get rid of any extra salt content and preservatives that might be floating around in there.

***Black pepper can be subbed for white, theres no difference

I know the struggles college students, those on budgets, and peeps who live in food deserts may have when it comes to getting some of these ingredients, so don’t feel you gotta have it all to make it taste good. Just work with what you got, get a little crafty and experiment a little, and maybe try some new things and see how you like it! (Like, seriously, rice milk is great I love it 😂 )

Lastly, this recipe is vegetarian and vegan friendly! (Sans egg for the vegans of course) so its super enjoyable for yall as well!

I’m not vegan nor vegetarian, and I have added meat sometimes in the past, but I like this version the best because it just taste the best to me.

If you try the recipe, feel free to shoot me an ask and tell me how it went! Now go get cookin! :D