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lordprettyflackotara · 7 months ago

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hitchhiker || chapter four || the proxies

tw: stalker hoodie, hoodies a bit gross in this one ngl, i think this is a fair warning, paranoia, blood, some fluffy shit w tim

i am proud to announce that hitchhiker now has a masterlist with a link to wattpad! find it here!! thank you to everyone who has helped me navigate using other platforms <3

<— previous chapter

Hoodie could understand your appeal.

What he couldn’t understand, was why Tim and Toby had picked you specifically.

Sure, your skin was soft and glowy. Your big innocent doe eyes were doll like. Hoodie’s darker urges craving to see them weep tears under his hand. Although you had overlooked their original odd behavior, was that enough? Were your looks and obliviousness enough to keep you alive?

Hoodie couldn’t understand Toby and Tim’s infatuation with you. It was becoming truly nauseating, sitting through them yapping about you all day long. You were the hottest topic of conversation, the rants about Jeff’s sloppy murders long discarded. Since he couldn’t figure it out, he figured he’d have to do his research.

And every good research session begins the same way: observation.

Hoodie had no issue watching you. He watched as you scrambled to get ready for work, showering so quickly he hardly had time to watch you dry off. He sat perched in an old oak tree across from your building, the overgrown branches and leafs concealing his presence. He noted you truly were oblivious, all of your curtains wide open. Maybe you thought being on the fourth floor saved you from having a peeping tom. In which case, you were terribly wrong.

He watched as you chatted with (who he assumed to be) Nova while running around, his eyes narrowing. Your friend seemed put together, a navy blazer and slacks dressing her thin frame. His eyes flickered back over to you, watching you get ready for work. You did have a nice figure. Your apron only emphasizing the fact. Hoodie had watched Nova slide on the blazer, her upper arms toned with muscle. Huh. So much for a lazy overweight detective. Those targets were easy to get rid of. Toby, in the mist of his yapping about his delightful walk home with you, mentioned Nova. He mentioned the vanilla folder and the case she was working on. Hoodie believed he was the first of the three to have the suspicion she took Winston’s place.

Usually task forces would lay off of the investigation once their colleagues began getting killed. But every so often, there would be a feisty motherfucker who only wanted to indulge in the case deeper. He watched as you darted out of your apartment, Nova grabbing her things and following you. His eyes searched for the vanilla folder. He watched her pack her beat up satchel, random white papers and pens being thrown inside. Yet, no vanilla folder. He grinned devilishly as Nova exited your apartment. Toby would be keeping a close eye on her investigation as she studied the Winston case. They had eyes everywhere, your date with Tim proving to be useful. It gave Hoodie enough time to truly snoop around.

His mind circled back to the vanilla folder, the bane of his existence in your best friends possession. Nova hadn’t left with the documents, the vanilla folder not on her person. Her not leaving with the folder meant one thing and one thing only: it was in your apartment. What did that mean? That Hoodie was going to be able to steal it with ease.

You felt like you were becoming paranoid. Your shift at Olive Garden was the same stressful experience it always was. Screaming children. Argumentative customers. Loud laughter. However, you felt like you were watched. You couldn’t figure out how or why. Your paranoia made you check on your tables faster. Your eyes constantly flickered around the restaurant, searching for the culprit. But all you found were families or couples eating their pasta and bread. By the end of your shift you were beat, shuffling into the bathroom to change clothes.

Davidson park was practically a straight shot from your work, there was no sense in dropping by your apartment. You briefly glanced at yourself in the mirror, not wanting to acknowledge how terrible you felt you looked. You were sure your lips were cracked and your eyes had dark circles decorating them. You shuffled into a bathroom stall, slipping out of your work uniform. You wondered if your perfume could truly mask the nauseating smell of pasta sauce. You began to put on deodorant, the light in the bathroom flickering.

You blinked a few times, trying to ensure you weren’t just sleep deprived. You looked up, a large bug caught in the ceiling light. It was bouncing between the light stick and the glass, creating the smallest sound of movement. You could see its shell, as well as its leggings thrashing around. You shoved it off, resuming changing into your normal clothes. You shoved on your boots, the unsettling feeling of you being watched falling over you again. This time you looked at the bottom gap of the stall door and the floor, a large set of black business shoes standing outside of your stall door. You blinked a few times, as if to double check what you were seeing was really there. “Hello?” You croaked, your mouth seemingly running dry. When was the last time you had drank water?

A gust of wind rushed past you, your head snapping behind you. You were in a tiny bathroom stall, what the actual fuck was creating wind? You turned back to the front of the stall, the pair of shoes now disappeared. Shoving your shirt over your head you exited the stall, looking around the bathroom. All of the stalls were empty, an eerie silence ensuing. Looking up you noticing the bug was no longer moving. Logically you should’ve been fine with it, the small creatures demise caused by the electricity. But the sight of the smallest pool of blood from the bugs corpse made your stomach churn, your face growing pale. How was that possible? The bug was a beetle, not a mosquito or anything with a handfuls worth of blood.

You ripped away your horrified gaze, forcing yourself to look at the floor instead. You shuffled out of the bathroom in a rush, the door hitting the wall as you flung it open. Ignoring the weird looks and questions from your coworkers you left the restaurant. You felt unsteady as you got in the car, your hands planting themselves firmly on the steering wheel. You felt like you had just seen a ghost, the crimson paint staining your mind. You swallowed and attempted to even out your breathing as you put the key into your ignition. You needed to get your shit together. You took a deep breath, putting your car in reverse and heading to see Tim.

Hoodie took his time inspecting your apartment, trying to see what he could find out about you. His curiosity as to what made you so interesting nagging him mid mission. With his partners not around, it gave him the freewill to be as nosy as he wanted to be without repercussions. Your apartment was tiny and cluttered, but he determined your clutteredness was from the lack of space more than being messy. Hoodie’s opinion shifted slightly at the sight of your last outfit on the bathroom floor. Your red lacey underwear caught his eye, the blonde smirking under his mask.

How long had it been since he had been with a woman? He squatted down, picking up the fabric with his ring finger. Hoodie could just imagine your round ass in these, the red complementing your skin tone. He lifted his ski mask just above his nose, inhaling the crotch material of your dirty panties. His face flushed red with lust. His cock was slowly beginning to grow in his jeans, the proxy pulling himself away from the fabric. He took a deep breath, imagining his tongue in between your folds as you pleaded for more.

Ahh yes, Hoodie would do anything to see you beg.

Regaining his focus he wadded up the panties, shoving them in his back pocket. He needed to focus. He left your bathroom, rounding over to your bedroom. Your dresser was covered in various perfumes and jewelry. Did you have more money than you were letting on? He picked up a large necklace, the fake jewels shining back at him in the moonlight. Thankfully you left your lamp on, the blonde beginning to rummage through your belongings more unhinged. He lifted up your mattress, looked under your bed, in your pillow cases, in your nightstands. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. There wasn’t even a trace that it was here.

Hoodie gritted his teeth as he pulled open your dresser drawers. His anger temporarily subsided as he eyed the first drawers contents. Rows of undergarments and bras nearly made his eyes pop out of his head. He shook his head, forcing himself to focus. He rummaged through your drawers, the folder no where in sight. He stomped into the kitchen, the living room empty besides a couch, old wooden coffee table, matching with a the same wooden TV stand, and an ancient television. His eyes wondered around your kitchen, landing on a stack of bills with large red OVERDUE stamps plastered on the front. Hoodie picked up the one on top, examining it.

Huh. Not necessarily poor, just poor spending habits. He tossed the envelope aside, continuing his search for the vanilla bane of his existence. And he wouldn’t be leaving until he found it.

You walked beside Tim down the sidewalk path, cool breezes rushing past the two of you. “So how was work?” He asked, starting conversation. Your shift was unnotable, if you took away the feeling of being watched and blood bug. “The usual. My table five had a lot of screaming children but it ended up being fine,” You answer as honestly as you could. You didn’t want to sound crazy, your paranoia getting the best of you. “What about you?” You added. You shoved your hands in your army green jacket, Tim’s hands shoved in his own mustard coat. For a brief second you saw a look of shock flash across Tim’s face, before he resumed his usual expression.

“The usual,” He answered truthfully. He shoved off the uncanny feeling of the Operators static depriving his senses. It wasn’t a usual punishment, the Operator more angry he had to send Kate than anything else. He always had a soft spot for the girl. “We both hate our jobs huh? You look like you just had a ptsd episode,” You chuckled, playfully elbowing him. Your innocence made Tim’s heart flutter, even with the deeper meaning your words unknowingly had. “You’re one to talk about ptsd episodes. You looked scarred when talking about screaming children,” Tim teased. He playfully poked your side, causing you to giggle. The moon hung in the sky, in seemingly a creepy smile. You made Tim feel normal, even if his life was no where near it.

“Oh please anything involving children provokes that face. I can’t imagine having them,” You say. The two of you strolled in unison, the street lights illuminating your path. “Really? Not even down the line?” Tim asked curiously. Of course it was impossible for him to have kids. He would never allow you to get pregnant, not from him or Brian or Toby. There was always the chance the Operator would be interested in the child. He couldn’t risk it. “Maybe. I’d always be afraid I let the wrong guy get me pregnant though,” You admitted. You felt your face go pale with embarrassment. “Oh fuck I said too much huh?” You laughed nervously. Tim couldn’t help but smile at your nervousness. You had no idea how cute you were.

“Not at all. You don’t have to worry around me. I’ve seen and i’ve done weirder things,” Tim told you. You both walked to the towns lake, the watery murky black as the moonlight reflected off of the glassy surface. “I’m really glad I met you Tim. I feel like you get it,” You say honestly. Tim raised an eyebrow, an owl hooting in the distance. “Get what?” He asked curiously. You flashed a nervous smile, tucking some hair behind your ears. “Like you get me. I’ve spent my whole life trying to fit in everywhere I went. Yet I feel at home with you three. It’s such an odd comforting feeling,” You explain softly. Tim took a step towards you, gently grasping your neck. Your eyes fluttered close, your breath hitching as his hot breath danced across your cool skin.

His chapped lips pressed a long kiss to your forehead, his touch soft and sweet. And most importantly, purposefully gentle. Tim pulled away slowly, holding your face in his gloved hands. You looked up at him, mesmerized by his chocolate orbs. He swiped his thumb across your cheek, soaking in your touch. You wanted to kiss him, his lips just out of reach. Tim wanted nothing more than to kiss you, his core yearning to taste your sweet plump lips. But he was trying to restrain himself. He knew he couldn’t have you. None of them could.

Slowly he pulled away from you, turning his gaze back to the black lake. You could feel the heat still dancing across your cheeks. Dumbfounded you turned towards the lake as well, standing side by side with the man you yearned for. There was an unsettling silence, one you decided to break.

“Hey Tim?”

“Hmm?”

Your mouth ran dry, your nerves getting the best of you. “Nothing never mind,” You babbled. You wanted to tell him about the bug. The shoes. The paranoia. But you didn’t want to scare him away. Tim raised an eyebrow, digging in his jeans pocket. He pulled out a beat up box of cigarettes, the red and white box shining in the moonlight. “Cig? It would help you loosen up a bit,” He offered. You had never considered touching a cigarette a day in your life. But the box sitting in Tim’s hand couldn’t look more intriguing even if it tried. Slowly you pulled one out of the box, looking at it. Tim did the same, immediately putting the stick to his lips. “You’ve never smoked before huh?” He asked. Shooting him an anxious smile you chuckled. His bluntness relaxed your nerves, your shoulders relaxing.

“What gave it away?” You asked him. Tim began digging around in his pocket, searching for a lighter. “You mean besides the fact that you’re eyeing it like it’s poison?” Tim chuckled. You rolled your eyes, the brunette flicking the lighter. He gave it a few flicks, the lighter finally producing a small flame. He inhaled sharply, the end of the cigarette lighting. “Haha very funny,” You replied dryly. Tim grinned as he exhaled the tobacco smoke out of his nose. You blinked, your morals seemingly nose diving out of the window at the sight of him. “You’re holding it like a nerd, go ahead and place it in between your lips for me pretty girl,” Tim instructed. Your cheeks turned pink as you placed the cigarette in between your lips. “Great now keep it there. When I tell you to, inhale for me,” He said. His words were getting to you, from his praise to referring to do things for him.

It made your core throb with an ache you had ignored for a long time.

He brought the lighter to the end of your cigarette, sparks flying as he tried to ignite it. The lighter refused to ignite, Tim’s eyes narrowing. “While I figure this out, you wanna tell me what you were going to a moment ago?” He asked. He took a step closer to you, attempting to block the wind from extinguishing the flame. “I uh, it’s hard to explain,” You said, your cigarette still dangling from your lips. Tim shook the lighter, growing increasingly annoyed. “I have terrible insomnia, nothing you can say will scare me away,” Tim told you. He said it so nonchalantly.

“You have-?”

“Yes, now it’s your turn.”

You stood dumbfounded. Another fast breeze blew past the two of you, your hair flying in the wind. “Well I just, um, I feel like i’m being watched. All the time,” You explain slowly. Tim tried to ignite your cigarette again, the lighter very clearly out of fluid. “Considering you’re the prettiest girl i’ve ever laid eyes on, I can believe that,” Tim chuckled. He took another large inhale of his cigarette, the foul stench flooding your nostrils. You felt like a ball of warmth, your mouth running dry. “You don’t mean that,” You say quietly. Tim raised an eyebrow, tossing the empty lighter aside. “I’m a lot of things, but i’m not a liar,” He whispered. Tim easily towered over you, your eyes meeting his, cigarette dangling from your lips.

Tim’s large hand guided you to hold your cigarette in between your index and middle finger, the orange end still on the edge of your lips. Quietly he moved closer to you, the two of you watching as the end of his cigarette hit the end of yours. With each passing second you grew more flustered, his face an inch away from yours. Despite the freezing cold weather outside, Tim made you feel an indescribable warmth. The kind that blossomed from inside of your chest and made your heart throb. “Inhale for me,” Tim murmured. You did as instructed, ignoring the feeling of flames engulfing your throat. You wanted to stay this close to him forever.

You felt the tobacco swirl around your lungs, your gaze landing on Tim’s. You removed the cigarette from your lips, allowing the wind to guide the smoke out of your mouth. “Feel better?” Tim asked. You began to cough, giving him a thumbs up as you looked away from him. Tim grinned as you bent over slightly, trying to clear your lungs and inhale oxygen. As his large hand patted your back you realized that you’d willingly throw yourself into his warm flames. No matter how much they threatened to burn you.

—> next chapter

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enchantedflameandflower · 4 months ago

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Perhaps you could write something? It’s my birthday and everyone seems to have forgotten. Maybe you could write Billy finding out it’s the readers birthday coming up and she’s crying because she doesn’t have family or friends and she’s alone, so be make sure she has a great day. (Fluff or smut, idk)

Yes! Happy belated birthday!!! I really wanted to get this ask out before everything else I’m working on because I know this feeling and it totally sucks. Billy would absolutely kiss it all better. Hope you all enjoy! (And happy birthday again anon! Thank you so much for the ask!)

Billy x you

You’d made it to nearly 7pm before the first tear finally slipped down your cheek, leaving a cold, wet trail in its wake.

Fuck it. You were proud of yourself for making it this long. You didn’t even bother to wipe it away. Another birthday, come and almost gone, without even a text. Yeah you had a few friends but it wasn’t worth it to truly open up to anyone anymore. Not really. But the older you got the harder it was to spend another birthday alone.

You were just about to go for the cheap liquor in the cabinet so you could take a sleeping pill and just drink until you passed out when there was a knock at your door. You almost thought of just ignoring it but what the fuck. You didn’t even care at this point if you were murdered by some psycho.

You opened the door and nearly dropped the bottle of vodka from the surprise. It was definitely a crazy person but not one that was going to kill you. At least not on purpose.

“Billy…” you managed to stammer out. “Uh…what…”

You’d been helping him out for awhile now when he needed information, you’d let him buy you a few drinks in payment now and again and you’d had the hottest fucking make out session at his office late one night a few weeks ago - until you’d been interrupted and decided it was probably for the best. He’d never come by your place before though and you knew it was ridiculous to be surprised he knew where you lived.

“Can a poor bloke come in, or ya gonna make me get on my knees and beg, doll?” he grinned.

Your stomach flip flopped wildly but you stepped aside, still at a loss for words, and - you couldn’t help it - quite intrigued.

“What are you…?”

“Came by to take ya out. Ya want to change? Nothin’ fancy or anythin’, just a dive I like down the street.”

“Take me out?” God you sounded so stupid but it’d been an awful day and you just couldn’t process anything and all of a sudden he looked so fucking good standing in your living room, and even though it was for the best you could not help thinking about all the dirty thoughts you’d had about him since that night. All of them included him naked and ravaging you, making you come until you couldn’t move anymore.

He grinned then, his dimple showing, and you wondered if he could tell what you were thinking. “Happy Birthday, doll. I meant to be here sooner but I got stuck with work.”

“How do you know when my birthday is?” you asked, shocked and looking up at him with wide eyes.

“Ya said somethin’ about no one callin’ you last year and I didn’t know if ya had anyone else this year either. Ya shouldn’t have to be alone if ya don’t want. And I’ve wanted to take ya out anyway.”

Tears stung at the back of your eyes again, this was almost impossible to believe, but you took a breath and pushed them down. “Yeah,” you smiled up at him. “I’ll change, it’ll just be a minute.”

~*~*~

You threw on your favorite pair of jeans, some boots and a nice tank top and Billy took your hand as he led you down the street. It was a dark, weathered looking bar but you didn’t mind. He sat you down in a booth in the back corner and went to the bar to order. “They have the best chips…er, fries,” he amended as he sat down across from you. “Loaded, you’ll love ‘em.”

One of the waiters brought the plate of loaded fries over along with two drinks. Billy ordered your favorite and you felt all your depression over this stupid day start to melt away.

“Thank you,” you murmured taking a drink and humming. It was good.

“Aw it’s nothin’,” he waved his hand in the air. But you could tell he knew how much this meant to you.

The fries were even better. You’d barely eaten all day and they were amazing. When you moaned out lout at how good they were, licking your fingers, he gave you a cheeky, knowing grin, clearly pleased with himself. You knew exactly what he was thinking and it felt really fucking good. God, you needed this.

The two of you shared the fries and just talked about everything. You made a joke about some ridiculous C-level supe and he laughed out loud, a deep rich, sound with a real smile. The whole thing nearly made you climb on his lap right there in front of everyone. You remembered exactly how he had felt when he’d kissed you weeks ago, his hands gripping your hips, pulling you against his swelling cock, his tongue plundering your mouth while his beard rubbed against your sensitive skin. Fuck you wanted him so badly.

The bar wasn’t too crowded but there was a group of girls at a table in the middle, laughing and having a good time. At one point some old rock song came on the jukebox and they got up, dancing around. You couldn’t help smiling, watching them. You hadn’t done anything like that in forever. Maybe sometimes it was worth it to get out, just let go and have fun.

Billy was watching you while you watched them and you caught his gaze as you turned back. There was a glint in his dark hazel eyes and it made your stomach flutter hotly. It was the first time you let yourself believe maybe there was more to this than him just being nice because he felt he had to.

At some point you got up to go to the restroom and when you returned, Billy had fresh drinks. He scooted against the wall as he watched you walk toward him. His gaze slid over you, head to toe then he was nodding for you to sit beside him instead of on the other side of the table.

You eagerly slide into the booth, pressing against his side as he lifted his arm for you to cuddle up close.

“You’re too good for me, love. But I’m starting to think I don’t give a fuck.”

You hummed happily and took a long drink of your alcohol. It was just enough to lighten your mood and make you just a bit tipsy, not too much.

His warm fingers brushed over your arm, his thumb rubbing your shoulder and you let you own hand fall to thigh under the table. It was firm and hot and you must have made some kind of stupid sound because the next you knew Billy gave a low chuckle.

“Thank you for doing this for me,” you murmured softly. You truly had not felt this good in a very long time “I never - Just thanks. I owe you one.”

You felt Billy lean over to kiss the top of your head. “Ya don’t owe me nothin’, love, though if you have somethin’ in mind, I certainly won’t argue…” His voice had dipped a little low and a shiver went through you at the implication.

One more big gulp and you were finished with your drink. “Walk me home?” you asked, turning to look up at him.

The look on his face said it all.

This time he had his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his body as he walked you back.

When you paused to unlock the front door of the building, he rubbed his hand back and forth over your hip and you fumbled the key twice before you got it in.

By the time you got to your own door you were almost shaking, you were aching for him so badly. And fuck, he seemed to know exactly what was happening because he spun you around before you could even try and get the key in again.

His eyes were dark and full of heated desire and you moaned out loud as he wound his strong arms around you and pulled you against him.

“Do ya want me to stay?” His big hand was sliding down and groping your ass, pulling you up and into him before he’d even finished the question.

“Fuck yes, Billy…” You were so hot and slick for him already you wouldn’t care if he took you right here in the hallway and you’d already decided this was absolutely the best birthday you’d ever had.

~*~*~

I didn’t want it to get crazy long but if y’all want a part two of birthday night with Billy I would looooove to write it, I have a bunch of ideas, let me know!

If you have also put in requests or are waiting for the next part to glimmer please know I will ABSOLUTELY write your request as soon as I’m able. I LOVE all the requests I’ve gotten so much! For my long Billy fic, I am very close to being done with the next part! ❤️ (OH MY GOSH I JUST REMEMBERED WHAT THAT CRAZY UNEXPLAINED NOTE IN MY BILLY NOTES WAS FOR WOOOOOO)

karl urban masterlist

#billy butcher #the boys #billy butcher fic #billy butcher brainrot go brr #billy butcher x you #karl urban #karl urban brainrot go brrr #the boys tv #billy butcher x reader #billy butcher fanfiction #karl urban is the man of my fucking dreams #billy butcher fanfic

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sc0tters · 1 year ago

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Operation Get Together | Cole Caufield

summary: it may have taken two summers but you and Cole are finally ready to make that move to get together.

request: yes/no

warnings: none.

word count: 1.82k

authors note: writing for Cole makes me happy so even though I’ve had this request for weeks, I’ve been waiting for her. I do love this so much though!

It seemed like everyone was on the same page.

Well everyone but you and Cole.

You had made your second appearance at the lake house after Luke met you during orientation week at UMich.

The friends the two of you had formed quickly blossomed making you his best friend outside of hockey.

So it was no surprise when you were invited to the lake house in the summer of freshman year.

Cole swore that he wasn’t meant for love before he met you. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to be in love but instead that he couldn’t seem to find it.

Unlike Cole, you were desperate for love. As a child you watched all of those Disney movies that caused you to crave that fairytale ending.

The place were your stories intertwined was that neither one of you felt like you had a person that truly got you.

It was a warm day when you arrived at the lake house, everyone else got there just a few days before you “we are going to find you a girl this summer.” Trevor announced patting the older boy on the back who let out a laugh at the offer.

Cole shook his head “don’t bother,” he sighed thinking about how he had just given up on dating apps.

Before the Ducks player had the chance to respond there was the sound of scream that came from inside “should we go check on that?” Cole asked with wide eyes as he got up already heading to the door before the younger boy could say no.

Luke let out a gasp as he spun you around in his arms “can’t believe you’re here!” His words made you laugh as Quinn thought it would be funny getting you an earlier flight without Luke knowing.

Trevor furrowed his eyebrows seeing the pretty girl who stood in front of them “you want to introduce us to your friend Lukey?” The Ducks player asked locking eyes with you.

The youngest Hughes boy shook his head “don’t get any ideas with her Z,” Luke protectively wrapped his arm around you causing a laugh to fall from your lips “I’m y/n.” You took note of Cole as he stood behind the taller hockey player.

Cole kept quiet as he took in your features “I’m Trevor, but you can call me whatever you want.” Luke had warned you that Trevor was going to be forward so this was only proving his case.

But you couldn’t help it when you let out a laugh.

This was going to be a long summer, you just hoped that it was going to have a lot more of Cole in it.

That request for the most part seemed to fall on deaf ears. Sure you and Cole grew closer but each time you tried to flirt with him, he just seemed to deflect your advances.

Yet you still ended the summer with his number and that meant Cole spent most of his off time keeping up with you.

A giggle left your lips as you watched Luke roll his eyes “yeah so there is a party tonight to celebrate the boys win.” You explained applying your lipgloss as you stared at your mirror.

Cole couldn’t help it as he watched you through the FaceTime call “you have fun tonight peach?” Cole asked scratching his jaw as you liked back at him.

He had just finished training and called you before called you so his hair was still sweaty as it fell down on his face “you know I will.” You smiled feeling your cheeks grow warm as you thought he was the hottest man alive in that moment.

Luke coughed reminding you that you two had to go “I gotta go Cole,” you sighed sending him a pout “have fun with Luke.” Cole sent you a salute before he hung up.

You turned to Luke with a stupid grin on your face causing your friend to smirk “got something you want to tell me?” Luke asked crossing his arms.

It was hard for you to keep anything a secret from Luke and this was no different “I think I like Cole?” You confessed as you shrugged.

That was months ago and the new operation going into summer was getting you and Cole together.

The boys all agreed that Cole clearly had the hots for you after he turned down a girl in Montreal.

Trevor couldn’t believe his eyes when that girl walked away from Cole “how the hell did you fuck that one up?” Trevor asked furrowing his eyebrows as he let out a scoff.

Jack nodded in agreement “she was like totally into you!” He slurred his eyes as he spoke in a duh tone.

Cole grumbled as he ran his fingers through his hair “I’m interested in someone else.” The HABs player shrugged nonchalantly despite the fact that this was the first time he was letting his friends learn about this.

The youngest boy’s eyes went wide “is it y/n?” Jack wasn’t an idiot as he had watched you get close to the boy. And Ellen had told her son that she thought it was cute how you and Cole talk after you sent Cole a snap with the Hughes mother.

If Cole tried to hide it then he wasn’t doing a very good job “yeah.” He nodded letting his words match his red cheeks.

It surprised all of the boys that nothing happened between you and Cole during the second summer, so with one week left at the lake house. They were all trying to help Cole get his graft on.

And that’s what brought you being paired up with him at the final golf game of the summer “you want to drive?” Cole asked as he followed you to the golf cart that you had been assigned.

He watched as you spun around to face him as you twirled the keys in your hand “you drive,” you nodded holding the keys out for him to grab “like it when you’re in charge.” Now that comment wasn’t meant to be sexual but Cole tried his hardest to ignore that.

Jack and Luke couldn’t help but laugh as they watched the interaction between you two as the older boy helped you load your clubs onto the back of the kart “you think they’re finally going to do something?” Jack asked turning his attention to his younger brother.

Luke shrugged “I mean I know y/n likes him.” You spent all of sophomore year turning down any advances that guys sent your way. And it was probably because she wanted Cole “she does?” weirdly enough the boys never actually had a conversation with Luke in their plan of getting you with the HABs player.

The youngest Hughes boy laughed as he nodded “last time she even looked at a guy like that was Quinn and she did that for two days.” When you first met Luke’s brothers you thought his eldest brother was hot but you quickly turned away from that idea as you began something with one of the other players on the ice hockey team.

Jack nodded playing his hands on his hips “maybe you’re right.” He shrugged thinking that operation get Cole and you together might have been easier than they all thought.

The game had gone on with nothing more than the occasional bit of flirtation thrown here and there but the biggest moment happened at the eighteenth “no peach.” Cole shook his head between his laughs as he watched you line up your club to putt this ball.

You sent Cole a glare “rather than laughing you could help your partner.” You reminded him causing the rest of the boys to laugh.

Cole took your offer though as he walked over to you “for a starters you gotta relax your arms.” When his hands went over yours you did the exact opposite of what he wanted.

His head rested on your shoulder “this angle is all wrong too.” He added shifter your feet so that you were now parallel to the hole.

Your head nodded as your breathed hitched feeling his hands readjust themselves on your op of yours “and there!” Cole let out a cheer as he swung your club watching as you finally got the ball into the hole on the first putt.

He moved his hands to wrap around your shoulders as he congratulated you “well done.” Cole mumbled pressing a kiss to your temple.

The moment you two had made was cut short as Trevor let out a dramatic gag “get a room you two!” It made the boys laugh as both of your cheeks turned red.

After that you two seemed to go back to your quiet states, barely talking as you both helped unpack the car “wonder where they went?” You mumbled seeing that the cooler boxes were the only things left in the trunk of the car and none of the boys were in sight.

Cole laughed as he shrugged “decided we didn’t need them.” He joked as he grabbed the extra cooler before you could get the chance “not so fast.” The hockey player shook his head as you let out a groan.

It made him smile “what kind of gentleman would I be if I made you take it peach?” He cocked his head flashing you a grin.

You let out a laugh as you shook your head “you are so cheesy!” You giggled placing your hands on your hips “only for you,” Cole shot back watching as you leaned against the car.

The only real thought that went through his mind was how pretty you looked with the stars shining down under the night sky “like that about you,” you confessed ignoring how your cheeks turned red.

Despite the fact that there was the brief two year age gap, Cole felt like he was falling for you fast “think I like you.” The boy shot back as he placed the cooler on the driveway letting the gap between you both shut.

You grinned like a kid in a candy store hearing that “think I like you too.” By the time you got your words out his hands were on your cheeks tilting your head up to meet his.

As he kissed you it was soft, could even call it loving as you melted under his touch “get it Coley!” Alex whistled causing you two to pull away to then see that all of the boys were stood by the front door watching you.

It made you hide your face in his chest “none of that tonight peach,” Cole shook his head as he hooked his fingers under your chin “gonna show you off to the whole world.” He mumbled pecking your lips as he smiled.

This was definitely the best end of the summer that you could have planned for.

#cole caufield imagines #cole caufield #hockey imagines #hockey imagine #nhl oneshot #nhl imagine #imagines #oneshots #Cole caufield x reader #amber writes fics

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alice-after-dark · 7 months ago

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Random Character Role Swap

So for the absolute funsies of it, I found a Hazbin Hotel random character generator and spun it to see who would get swapped with who. I chose to just focus on the denizens of Hell for this (yes, I am still including Vaggie) and Lucifer and Lillith will stay the same as well. Personalities and most friendships/ships are staying the same, but roles and powers have been changed. Here are the results:

Vox - Angel

Velvette - Charlie

Valentino - Carmilla

Alastor - Mimzy

Husk - Zestial

Niffty - Razzle & Dazzle

Cherri Bomb - Rosie

Sir Pentious - Vaggie

Notes under cut! I am very curious to hear people's ideas and thoughts on these swaps! Also here's the wheel if anyone wants to play!

Vox - He is a famous porn star under contract with Carmilla and the first resident of the Hazbin Hotel. He is formerly a friend of Alastor's, but after a falling out, they are enemies. Because of this, he is distrustful of Mimzy as the host of the hotel, as she and Alastor are close. He is in an abusive relationship with Valentino, believing the Overlord truly loves him.

Angel Dust - He a member of ACC and is the Overlord of Media. He is a famous actor, starring in many films and shows. He has a (unknowingly reciprocated) crush on fellow Overlord, Husk. He was formerly in a relationship with Valentino.

Velvette - The owner of the Hazbin Hotel. A fairly new arrival to Hell, she wants to make a name for herself, seeking to figure out if there is a way out of this literal Hell hole.

Charlie - She is a member of ACC and the Princess of Hell. While not an Overlord herself, she runs the fashion and social media side of the Entertainment District. Vaggie is her girlfriend.

Valentino - He is the Overlord of all weapons manufacturing. He starts and frequently takes part in turf wars, supplying weapons to both sides of the conflict for profit. He is in an abusive relationship with Vox and was formerly in a relationship with fellow Overlord Angel Dust.

Carmilla - She is a member of ACC and the Overlord of the sex industry. She rules her industry with a firm but gentle grip and has been voted "Hell's Hottest MILF" 60 years running. She is friends with Zestial. She is aware of Vox's relationship with Valentino and disapproves, but maintains her distance from her contracts' personal affairs. She hopes the hotel will get him to leave Valentino.

Alastor - He owns a jazz club where he is the lead performer. He is friends with Mimzy and Rosie. He is formerly friends with Vox, but after a falling out, they are enemies. This former friendship is what prompts him to follow Mimzy to the hotel, taking up a position as head of recreation.

Mimzy - She is the infamous Radio Demon and the sponsor of the Hazbin Hotel. She is friends with Alastor from when they were alive.

Husk - He is the oldest of the Overlords. He has a (unbeknownst to him) reciprocated crush on fellow Overlord Angel Dust.

Zestial - He is a former Overlord now under contract to Mimzy. He is the bartender of the Hazbin Hotel. He is friends with Carmilla.

Niffty - She is Charlie's protector and helper, assigned by Lucifer himself to watch over his daughter. She is Charlie's head seamstress.

Razzle & Dazzle - They are the hotel's cleaning crew and pest control.

Cherri Bomb - She is the Overlord of the stuck-in-the-80s Cannibal Town and is close friends with Angel Dust.

Rosie - She is a prim and proper demolitions expert from the Victorian era. She is friends with Alastor.

Sir Pentious - He is the manager of the Hazbin Hotel. He has a crush on the Overlord of Cannibal Town, Cherri Bomb. His beloved Egg Bois serve as the hotel's bellhops (I just couldn't bring myself to separate them plus they'd make such cute bellhops!).

Vaggie - She is a fallen angel and former Exorcist turned one of Hell's greatest inventors. She is Charlie's girlfriend.

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tightjeansjavi · 2 years ago

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Cigarettes & Feelings

“I know you see me there you’re always playing this game”

(Javi Peña x f! reader) Part 2 (+18)

A/N: if there’s one thing I love, it’s a man in denial about having a crush, and a man coming to accept that he does have said crush. It’s chefs kiss. You’ll be angry with Javi in the first half of the chapter (he’s a douche) but after a quick trip to the brothel, he’s got his shit straightened out..well, sorta.

Happy reading! ♡

~word count: 3.9k~

Summary: Agent Peña, Bogotá's infamous playboy. Has he met his match when he meets you, the US Embassy's newest receptionist.

Warnings: Javi acting like a stereotypical douche/playboy, Murphy tells him to cut that shit out, Javi takes his frustrations out at the brothel, smut (not with the reader) protected sex, nipple play, doggy style, praise kink, very light breath play, teasing, pillow talk, nicknames such as: cariño, hermosa, muñeca, whore is used but not in a derogatory sense, Javi is put in his place twice, denial of feelings of course, Javi and the reader reach a middle ground by the end of the chapter, angsty vibes, internal thoughts, denial, pining (if you squint) Javi is turning over a new leaf thanks to some much needed advice, ends on a cliffhanger sorry not sorry hehe, (+18) minors dni!

Agent Peña Playlist:

Bogotá, Colombia 1988

It had been a whole month since you started to work at the US Embassy in Colombia. An entire month of Javier Peña’s fruitless attempts at getting you to fall for his vexatious charm. He’d go out of his way to make a comment about your nails. Saying that a specific shade of pink that was doted on your nails, really brought out the color in your eyes. Could he be any less original? Every time ‘querida’ or ‘hermosa’ or any other nicknames Javier had so graciously given you would slip past his plush pink lips, your eyes would immediately roll like a pair of dice. It was becoming a routine for you, turning down agent Peña’s flirtations towards you was a piece of cake. The other receptionists started to catch on as well and no longer fed into the agent's bullshit.

Javier was feeling personally vexed by you. Even more so now that he could no longer look forward to a quick fuck from one of the other receptionists that used to be wrapped around his finger. It seemed like you were going to end up being a real thorn in his side. Murphy on the other hand was truly getting a kick out of seeing his partner getting shot down by you everyday. It was like clockwork, and a breath of fresh air to see Javier be humbled by you.

“You know..she’s really not even that pretty. Average at best.” Javi had muttered with a cigarette pursed between his lips as he was going through another file that could potentially help bring down Pablo Escobar.

“Wasn’t it just the other day you were saying that she was the hottest thing on two legs? Or were you talking about someone else? Hard to keep track of all of them, Javi.” Murphy didn’t even look up from his typewriter and he already knew that Javi was rolling his eyes.

“Yeah, that was when she wasn’t getting in my way of getting some decent pussy around here. She’s somehow managed to get every single fucking woman in the office to turn on me. Un-fucking believable.” Javi was in fact rolling his eyes.

“Why don’t you just jerk off like a normal fucking person if it aggravates you that much. Or, I don’t know, maybe not eye fuck her every chance you get? Just a thought. Connie would be tearing you a new one if she heard the shit that just came out of your mouth Peña.” Murphy reached over and snatched the file from the agent's hands without another word.

Javier's eyes narrowed over his desk. He was feeling annoyed and perhaps even a little offended by Murphy’s words. “Is that what your married life consists of? Only having the option to jerk off? You poor poor man.” He pushed himself out of his chair with a huff as he doused his cigarette out and grabbed his leather jacket. “I’m going out.” He announced to the other agent before grabbing his badge and gun and strode out the office space. He walked right past your little cubicle, and you could feel the irritation radiating off of his skin as his magnetic cinnamon brown eyes met yours for a millisecond before he was quickly looking away, gritting his jaw tightly.

Murphy was chuckling under his breath as Javi announced his departure. His stature alone was a dead giveaway on where exactly he was headed off to. Javi often visited the local brothel whenever he was facing frustrations that could only seemingly be coddled by his cock sheathed in a woman’s warmth. “Uh huh. Enjoy getting your dick wet, asshole.” Murphy muttered to himself before he got up from his desk and made his way over to your cubicle.

“Let me guess, he’s off to the brothel again?” You looked up at the agent with a small grin graced across your features.

“He sure is. I think you’ve really managed to get unimaginably deep beneath his skin. I gotta say, I’m impressed. He’ll be back after he goes and licks his wounds. Good job on keeping him humbled.” He shot you a wink, giving you a light fist bump.

“Have I really? I had no idea he was that sensitive. You’d think at this point he’d just get over himself.” You let out a faux sigh of disappointment.

“Javier? Getting over himself? Not a chance, sweetheart. You’re certainly giving him a run for his money. It’s a breath of fresh air to see.”

“A man’s gotta give up eventually, right? How long is he realistically going to keep this up?”

“Not Javier I’m afraid. The only way he’s going to give up is if he feels like he stands no chance. Right now, he still thinks that you’re just playing a game with him.” Murphy stated what he felt was the obvious.

You couldn’t help but laugh and shake your head. Javier Peña was vexing you in his own way.

“A game that he has no chance of winning.”

The sound of skin slapping against sweat soaked skin mixed in with high octave moans of pleasure could be heard through the thin walls of one of Medellíns many brothels. Javier was a frequent customer who tipped well, and never left a woman there feeling unsatisfied.

Catalina was his personal favorite at this brothel but he wasn’t particularly picky either. He just liked her for the fact that she understood him best. Always let him vent to her after he’d fuck her brains out. He never had a problem paying her extra for her services.

His hand was firmly wrapped around her throat with his thumb lightly applying pressure to her windpipe as he fucked her from behind. His free hand found purchase around her middle, grasping firmly around the soft tissue of her breast as he yanked her back against his chest. Her strangled moans drove him forward as he snapped his hips against her ass at an unforgiving pace. His lips were all over her skin, her cheek, jawline, neck. He was a biter. His teeth nipped at the skin below her ear as filth slipped past his lips. “Give it to me, hermosa. I need it so bad. Soak my cock with this tight little pussy. C’mon, muñeca. Give. It. To. Me.” He grunted deeply against her ear, letting his hand drift from her breast down her navel where his fingers began to toy with her clit, rubbing the small bud in tight, expert circles.

She came undone around him shortly after, crying out his name.

Javi. Javi. Javi.

“Cata, how do I get through to someone as stubborn as her? This game her and I are playing is fun, don’t get me wrong, but she’s so fucking frustrating.” Javier spoke with a soft breath, resting his arm behind his head as she lit the cigarette between his lips, brushing her fingers across his jawline gently.

“Javier, not every woman is going to be interested in you. Although, I can’t wrap my head around as to why..” she pressed a kiss to his bicep, resting her cheek along the crook of his neck.

Javi took a deep inhale as he let his free arm gently drop along her shoulders, fingers lightly dancing across her warm skin. “She’s the first woman I have come across that hasn’t shown a lick of interest in me. Or, she just does a real damn good job of hiding it from me.” He chuckled, blowing the smoke up towards the low-lit ceiling.

“Are you nice to her, Javier? You’re gorgeous, no doubt, but not every woman is into asshole DEA agents. Maybe you should try a different tactic and see how she responds? I know women very very well. We deserve to be, and should be respected by our male counterparts. I may be a whore, who enjoys being fucked like one, but that doesn’t mean I’d enjoy it if you degraded me, or made me feel like I was less than a person.”

Javier paused for a moment, closing his eyes as he took a deep inhale. No, he hadn’t really thought about it that way. Had he disrespected you and just not realized it? Perhaps Catalina was right, perhaps he needed to take an entirely different approach when it came to pursuing you. “Yeah, I’d say I’m pretty nice. I make comments about her nails and how the shade she is wearing really brings out the color of her eyes. Okay, and I eye fuck her at least once or twice a day. I’ve respected you, haven’t I? I’ve..never degraded you, have I muñeca?”

Catalina couldn’t help but lightly giggle as she pressed a soft kiss to his neck, reaching up and plucked the cigarette between his lips and brought the unlit end to her own, taking a slow drag as she rolled over onto her back with ease. “My sweet, it sounds to me that you might be developing a crush for this girl, hmm? Has Javier Peña finally met his match? Perhaps you should stop eye fucking her, and cool it with the compliments. Those end up growing old very fast, and she probably would appreciate it if you had..a normal conversation with her? You have always respected me, Javi. You happen to be my favorite customer and no, it’s not just because of your cock. You’re a passionate lover, and I appreciate the fact that you’ve never treated me any differently for the fact that I’m a whore. So why would you treat this girl any differently?”

Javier couldn’t help but scoff under his breath at her comment about him having a crush on you. Javier Peña did not have crushes. He fucked with no strings attached, period. “Hermosa, I do not have a crush on her. Since when do I ever have crushes? Do I look like a little school girl to you?” He chuckled, rolling over onto his elbow, propping himself up. He let his hand drift around her bare breast, lightly toying with her nipple between his thumb and forefinger, before he was leaning over and replacing his fingers with his mouth as he wrapped his lips around the nub, kissing and licking languidly.

Catalina let out a hum, letting her eyes flutter shut as she took another drag from the cigarette. She slowly slid her fingers through his sexed up hair, twirling a strand around her finger. “Denial is the first stage to acceptance, Javi. I know a man that has a crush when I see one, and you most definitely have one cariño.”

Javi let out a low growl, scraping his teeth along her sensitive nub as he flicked his tongue across it, nose firmly pressed against the top of her plush breast. “I. Do. Not. Have. A. Crush.” He enunciated each syllable against her skin just to prove his point.

Catalina let out a low hiss, nearly dropping the cigarette from between her lips as she gripped his hair at the roots and firmly tugged on it. “Keep on telling yourself that Javier. You and I both know you’re lying.” She mewled.

Javier ignored her as his hand drifted down between her thighs and he wasted no time to coax them open so he could drag his fingers through her slick. “Hermosa, less talking. Let me take care of you some more.”

Javier didn’t leave the brothel till almost the evening hours. He paid Catalina handsomely for her services and then some. Before returning to the office, he made a quick pit stop at his apartment so he could shower, and rinse away the aroma of cum, and the stench of sex that was still lingering on his skin.

He was surprised to see that you were working late on a Friday night. He expected that you’d have some plans to go out dancing or drinking with friends. The night life in Medellín was like none other. More so, he was surprised that you were walking over to his desk of all places. What game could you possibly be playing at now, he wondered.

You weren’t 100% sure as to why you felt like being the bigger person and saying goodnight to Javier before you’d leave the office for the evening. Your feet were moving before your brain could stop you, and soon you found yourself standing in front of his desk.

He had a cigarette pursed between his lips, (he always did) and the smoke billowed up around his face like a gray halo. He was anything but a saint.

“Goodnight, Javier. I hope you have a pleasant weekend.”

Javi slowly looked up at you. He gave you a once over, despite Catalina’s warning to not do that anymore. His brow was raised as you bid him a good evening. “You as well, cariño. Have any fun plans for the weekend?” He was genuinely curious to hear your answer.

Your Friday night plans consisted of a bottle of wine, and a good book. You hadn’t made any friends as of yet, but Javier did not need to know that. That’s the last thing you needed the DEA agent to know.

“Uh huh. I do have fun plans actually.” The way you were no longer meeting his stare, was a dead giveaway for Javi to know that you were lying to him.

“Yeah? Well, what are these said fun plans that you have hermosa?” Javier asked with a smirk playing on his lips, taking a deep drag as the tip of the cigarette burned bright orange.

“Okay, so I lied. I don’t have any fun plans. Unless you consider going home and curling up on the couch with a good book, and a glass of wine, fun plans then no.”

Javier was shocked for the second time that evening in a matter of mere minutes. “You mean to tell me that someone as attractive as you are, has absolutely no plans to go out on this beautiful Friday night in Medellín? I don’t believe that for a minute cariño.”

“Yeah, so how about you don’t rub it in my face? Thanks. Anyway, I’m leaving now.” You were already turning on your heel when you felt Javier’s warm palm gently make contact with your wrist.

“I’m not trying to rub it in your face or anything like that hermosa. I’m genuinely just shocked that you’re not going out tonight. Medellín has so much to offer.” He paused, thinking about what he could say next and then it hit him. Here was his chance to see you outside the workplace for once.

“Well, you’re more than welcome to come out for drinks with Steve and I, and his wife Connie. I just have something to finish up here, and then I am going to go meet them.” He doused his cigarette against the ashtray, keeping his eyes locked on yours as he waited for your answer with a bated breath.

“Are you inviting me out for drinks because you think you’re going to get lucky tonight? Cause if that’s the case, then no. I’ll politely pass.” You fought the urge to scoff at the fact that he even bothered to ask you.

“No, that won’t be necessary at all. Can’t a coworker ask another coworker out for drinks and not assume he’s going to end up lucky?” Javier had a frown playing across his kissable lips that made you want to believe that he had an ulterior motive. Truthfully, you would much rather go out for drinks than spend another night alone.

“Okay, fine. No funny business, right?” You looked at him with a raised brow, arms crossed over your chest.

“No funny business, cariño. I promise. I’ll be on my very best behavior.” Javier assured you.

“Great. Glad that we’re finally on the same page, Peña. I’ll just need to run to my apartment real quick to change. These heels are fucking killing me.”

Javi was already up from his desk, grabbing his badge, gun and box of smokes as he swung his leather jacket over his shoulders. “Well, can’t say I’m surprised about that. They look incredibly uncomfortable. I give major props to you, and the other ladies in the office for wearing them everyday. Is your place far from here? I could always drive you, if you’d like.”

��I thought you had something you needed to finish up Javier?” You glanced over at him wearily as you processed the fact that he was genuinely being nice to you and not eye fucking you like you were a piece of meat. “Sure, that would be great actually. Just don’t get any ideas, alright?”

“It’ll become Monday’s problem. Although, Murphy and I are always on the job. Hence why I keep my badge and gun on me at all times. You just never know when you might really need it.” He swung his keys lightly around his finger as he gestured for you to walk in front. “What kinda ideas would I possibly get from you letting me drive you to your apartment cariño?” He couldn’t help but lightly chuckle as he walked alongside you, flicking the light off on his way out.

“Does it ever weigh on you? Not physically, but the fact that you always have to keep it on you?” You looked over at him as you adjusted the strap of your bag along your shoulder. “The kind that will make you think that I’m going to be inviting you into my apartment Javier.”

Javi wasn’t expecting your question to say the least. Your words immediately had a visible effect on him as it weighed on his mind. He held the door open to the parking lot on the side of the building for you to walk through first. “Sometimes it does. I usually don’t actively think about it. The badge and gun have just become a part of me, in a sense. If they’re not on my person, then they’re right next to my nightstand when I sleep. It just comes with this line of work. You always have to be prepared for the worst.” He opened the passenger side door for you. “I’ll wait outside your apartment door. How does that sound to you?”

“So I take it..there’s never a moment where you ever let your guard down? Simply because if you do, it could be a situation of either living or dying? Or maybe that’s too extreme for me to say.” You gave him a small nod as you climbed into the passenger seat taking a note of how tidy his car was. There was a lingering scent of tobacco smoke and cologne that seemed to be embedded in the upholstered seats.

Javi lightly shut the door behind you before he made his way over to the driver's seat and climbed in before he started the engine. “I’ve let my guard down plenty of times, hermosa. I’m only human after all. Mistakes happen unfortunately. I do my best to avoid those kinds of situations from happening, but sometimes it’s truly out of our control.” He placed his arm around the back of your seat as he backed out of the parking spot. You felt the warm skin of his forearm lightly brush against your neck. It sent welcoming shivers down your spine.

“I understand what you’re saying. You are only human after all like you said. I have to ask, do you think you’re gonna catch him?” Javier knew you were referring to Pablo Escobar. A Spineless coward, who was violent, and frankly a piece of shit that Javier wanted nothing more to see him rot in an American prison.

“If we don’t catch him, then I personally have failed the people of Medellín. This city is beautiful, vibrant, and Escobar has done nothing but fucking taint it.” He inhaled deeply, shaking his head at the thought of this slimiest excuse of man slipping through the DEA’s grasp once again. “Do you mind if we..if we don’t talk about my job for the rest of the evening? You’re not prying, and I can’t fault you for being curious, but I don’t sleep much as it is because of everything that is going on.”

Javi was internally beating himself up for allowing himself to show a moment of weakness to you. He didn’t want you to know just how much being a DEA agent truly affected him. He didn’t want you to know about everything he had sacrificed, and lost, just to get to where he was. He certainly did not need you knowing that he thought of himself as a failure.

You were shocked to see that a layer of figuratively tough skin was being pulled back from Javier’s natural flirtatious and playboy persona that he performed so well. You could only imagine what he had experienced in his line of work. “Of course. I’m sorry for bringing it up in the first place, Javi.” You thought about saying more, but the last thing you wanted to do was come across as being disingenuous.

Javi glanced at you for a moment as he did a damn good job of hiding his smile when you had comfortably called him Javi, instead of Javier. “Cariño, it’s okay. You don’t have to apologize for being curious. You’re not the first person to ask me about my job, and you won’t be the last. How about we both agree to just..let work go for the evening. It’s your first night out in Medellín, and I want to make sure it’s a memorable one.”

You were looking over at him now from where you sat in the passenger seat. “Okay, deal. Let’s let work go for the rest of the evening.”

“Trato, cariño.”

You gave Javi the directions to your apartment. It was just a few miles from the office, but you were grateful for him driving you. He waited just outside your apartment door, as promised. His back was against the wall, cigarette pursed between his lips as he lit the tip of it with practiced ease. As he waited for you to finish getting ready, he pressed the base of his palm against his forehead, replaying the conversation he had with you in his head, over and over again. Is this what Catalina meant when she advised him to be nicer to you? Did she mean that he needed to be vulnerable? He hated being vulnerable. He hated showing any signs of emotions, or weakness. So why the hell did he find it to be so goddamn easy to open up to you?

Just as he was pondering over the possible answer to his disarray, your apartment door opened, ceasing his current thoughts when he took in your appearance with a heavy gulp.

“What? Is there something on my face?” You asked when you caught the DEA agent staring at you for far too long. You could feel your skin heating up under his gaze. Except this time, he wasn’t staring at you like he wanted nothing more than to take you back into your apartment and fuck you into your mattress.

Oh no, Javier Peña was staring at you with timid adoration. His brown swirled with warm flecks of cinnamon eyes gazing at you under the fluorescent hanging light alongside your apartment door. The tip of his cigarette blazing orange, creating a flicker between his and your eyes.

“No. I am simply just finding myself being transfixed by your beauty, hermosa.” The words flowed thoughtfully past his plush lips.

Shit.

Tag List: @chaotic-mystery @peterhollandkait @pedgeitopascal @userpedros @pedrospartner @korynnekorynne @kirsteng42 @yazsos @last-girl @amanitacowboy @lovers-liability @tinygarbage @777-wonders @dinsdjrn @myrealmofchaos @loquaciousferret @pedrostories @axshadows @dev1lm4n

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saucyjothoughts · 3 months ago

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🦋 It's hate-sex day and now I can't stop thinking about jance and Jan “at first I was a bit sus but the second time we met him I knew he was the one” Peteh needing a little encouragement to warm up to Nace.

Was he really a bit sus at first or was it just that he was so incredibly, impossibly hot that the only reaction Jan's brain was able to muster was telling himself he didn't like him?

What if after the first meeting he was like "I'm gonna hate-fuck that man and show him how much I don't like him until he understands he doesn't belong here" but then it completely backfired?

Did he plan on getting him home and fucking him rough, hard and fast, growling in his ear, letting him know he didn't trust him even a little bit, that he couldn't just come into their little friend group with that big bright smile and sunshine personality and expect him to believe that he wasn't an asshole in disguise, but Nace, sweet sweet Nace was so desperate, so eager, so responsive, willing to take anything Jan wanted to give him, and such a good boy for him with just that tiny bit of brattiness, making Jan's head spin with the feelings he'd been trying to suppress?

Or was that just his original plan, but Nace beat him to it, pushing Jan hard against the wall the moment they were left alone, smashing their lips together in one of the hottest kisses Jan had ever been given, all tongue and teeth and hands exploring and marks being sucked into his skin, showing him how he should behave, just how bad of a host he had been for a possible future bandmate, making him submit under his big hands and his teeth and lips and his strong tattooed arms, seemingly knowing exactly what made Jan go absolutely crazy, hitting all the right spots and thrusting into him at an almost unbearable pace that made Jan's brain turn into putty and the only thoughts left in his mind being more and Nace and fuck, dick so good he could no longer deny how he truly felt about the new bassist?

Do the guys know/suspect anything, or did he just go from "I don't like that guy" to "Actually, I think he's the one" between their first and second meeting with Nace without further explanation, only to take him home again that night and fuck him into oblivion as a little treat, a celebration that they'd officially welcomed him as a new addition to the band?

I think I might be going a little crazy ngl...

🔥🔥🔥🥵🥵🥵

#umazane misli #jance #nace jordan #jan peteh #🦋

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linked-through-the-centuries · 9 months ago

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To help explain personality/chaos levels/Vibes for each of the Links, here’s how I imagine all of them would drive if cars existed (loosely ranked from best to worst, it’s not a hard set scale):

Twilight: Literally perfect, has never hit the curb before in his life, always uses his turn signal, never speeds, has never been pulled over. Driving with him feels SAFE and he makes sure everyone is comfortable and ready to go BEFORE he starts the car. He will tell everyone off for being too loud and tell them he needs to focus on the road, and he also checks the traffic maps before he goes anywhere so he knows the best route to take because he gets anxious sitting in heavy traffic. Most likely to have a minivan to drive ‘the kids’ around in, and also a pickup truck for work

Calamity: Perfect driver, both hands on the wheel always. The car ride is dead silent because he’s mute and also refuses to put on music, plus he’s not that talkative anyway, so it’s up to whoever’s in the car to talk if they want to. Would probably drive a small black SUV

Past: The kind of person who you cannot read whether or not they’re a good driver just based on vibes, but are surprisingly good. Sometimes stops are a bit rough and maybe they’ve hit the curb once or twice, but has never been given a ticket. Would have an older car that they’ve taken good care of, like an early 2000s Toyota Corolla

Mask: He’s a good driver, he’s just so stressed he has a death grip on the wheel and if people don’t let him over on the highway or he can’t merge over on surface streets he will burst into frustrated tears. Has to have the music turned up loud enough so that Hylia can also hear it, but without it he’ll be too much of a nervous wreck to drive. Would drive an SUV, he couldn’t handle anything bigger (he’d get too stressed out)

Sky: His kindness and music taste makes up for the fact that in a fifteen minute drive, you gripped the handle and feared for your life once. He asks if people are buckled up before he starts the car because one time he braked so hard Mask’s face bounced off the dash and he still feels bad about it. Would drive a smaller car and it’s definitely bright red

Minish: Inexperienced, and sometimes forgets to put on his turn signal. Has ran a red light once or twice. He’s 15 so he wouldn’t have his own car, he’d probably use Twilight’s or Wars’s

Warriors: He has never been in a crash that was his fault, which no one believes because getting in the car with this man feels like tempting the reaper. The kinda guy to hit a pot hole that leaves the car making a brand new sound and just go “OOPSIES!!!” but he cries himself to sleep over it. He either screams along to his playlists or he tells you the hottest gossip you’ve ever heard. Usually has an iced coffee in one hand and waves it around when he talks. Would have a Ford Escape, but like a 2013 Ford Escape specifically. He also checks the traffic maps before he leaves because he likes to he efficient and will leave very early for whatever event he’s going to

Tune: He’s never been the direct cause of a crash and that’s what’s important. He calls his car “ol’ girl” in the most respectful loving manner, and treats the car better than anything else in his life. That being said, he is a truly awful driver and would have a little old sports car

Hyrule: Struggles to stay in the lanes because he gets distracted by landmarks. Past has had to grab the wheel and steady it on more than one occasion. HAS hit another vehicle because he stopped too late. He’s also run several red lights because he thought he could make it

Tears: Better at off road driving than on road driving. You need to take a car up the side of a mountain? Tears is your guy. Otherwise don’t get behind the wheel with them, EVER.

#linked through the centuries #lttc #lttc past #lttc warriors #lttc mask #lttc tears #lttc tune #lttc sky #lttc minish #lttc twilight #lttc hyrule #lttc calamity #jes talks #links meet au

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hotvintagepoll · 9 months ago

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Propaganda

Machiko Kyō (Rashomon, Floating Weeds, Older Brother Younger Sister)— Considered an early sex symbol in Japanese cinema. Also just an ethereal beauty who can also go feral/unhinged in a glorious way.

Judy Garland (Meet Me In St. Louis, A Star is Born, Summer Stock)— Judy is the GOAT when it comes to classic movie musicals. The voice of an angel who deserved so much better than she got. She can sing she can dance she can act she's a triple threat. Though she had a turbulent personal life (her treatment as a child star by the studio system makes me mad as hell like Louis b Mayer fight me ((she was made to believe that she was physically unattractive by the constant criticism of film executives who made her feel ugly and who manipulated her onscreen appearance by capping her teeth and using discs in her nose to change its shape and Mayer called her "my little hunchback" like imagine hearing that as a child and not having damage)) she always goddamn delivered on screen and in any performance she gave. She began in vaudeville performing with her sisters and was signed to MGM at 13. Starting out in supporting parts especially paired with mickey Rooney in a bunch of films (she's the best part tbh) she eventually transferred to the lead role. She is best known for her starring role in movie musicals like the iconic Wizard of Oz (somewhere over the rainbow still hits hard and is ranked the top film song of all time), meet me in St. Louis (Judy singing have your self a merry little Christmas brings tears to the eyes she is that powerful), the Harvey girls (she looks like a technicolor dream and sings a catchy af song about trains), Easter parade ( dancing and singing with Fred Astaire), for me and my gal, the pirate, and summer stock ( with pal Gene Kelly who she helped when he was starting out and he helped her when she was struggling). But she also does non- singing just as well like the clock ( her first movie where she sings no songs and is an underrated ww2 era romance), her Oscar nominated a star is born ( like the man that got away she put her whole soul in that and I have beef with the fact she lost to grace kelly ((whom I love but like still not even her best work)), and judgement at Nuremberg (a courtroom drama about the nazi war criminal trials). Outside of film she made concert appearances to record-breaking audiences, released 8 studio albums, and had her own Emmy-nominated tv series. She was the youngest (39) and first female recipient of the Cecil B DeMille award for lifetime achievement in the film industry. Girl was a lifelong democrat and was a financial and moral supporter of many causes including the civil rights movement (she was at the March on Washington and held a press conference to protest the 16th street Baptist church bombings). She was a friend of the Kennedy family and would call jfk weekly often ending the calls by singing the first few lines of somewhere over the rainbow (she thought of them as Gemini twins).She was a member of the committee for the first amendment which was formed in response to the HUAC investigations. Though she died far too young and tragically she remains an icon for her work and her life. As a girl who didn't feel like i was as pretty as everyone else I have always felt a connection to Judy and I just really love her.

This is round 3 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Machiko Kyō:

Judy:

Judy's voice alone qualifies her for at least top ten hottest HOT VINTAGE MOVIE WOMEN. She was a truly incredible swing singer, with a stunning voice on top of her technique. Her short dark hair looked incredible in just about any style. Have I mentioned her swagger? I can’t do it justice with words. She had swagger. She was funny as hell, and clever too. Incredibly charming and cool. I adore her.

Her eyes, her voice have bewitched me

I mean how can you beat the one and only Judy? She's beautiful, her smile is contagious, the way she sings with her whole body. You can't help but love her.

youtube

Beautiful woman, love her singing voice. And she can do everything between happy or silly and angry or heartbroken

#judy garland #machiko kyō #hotvintagepoll #fuck that old woman #ladies 3

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earthstellar · 2 years ago

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Watching Earthspark Eps 11 - 18!

So today was miserable on the Saturday shift so I’m going to be getting gradually absolutely shithouse drunk and watching Earthspark. All of the new episodes!!!

This is my first look at all of the episodes, so these are my initial takes!

I have not eaten today as I have been on shift, so I am likely to be genuinely drunk by the end of this, but I am taking actual notes here.

Commentary as I go below, tagging for spoilers with every tag I know of just in case!

Episode: 11 // Beers: 2

Is the white woman evil? I’m going to say yes, because it sure seems like it.

I love the idea that everyone has the capacity to experience an alt-mode slightly differently; It is dependent on the individual’s perspective, what their experience is in a changed form.

Absolutely love that.

Also, is this the first time we’ve seen what a bot’s experience can be, while in non-root mode? I think so! Although this seems to be specific to her? but we’ll see

The implication that alt-modes can be controlled by external forces is extremely upsetting.

Give me a moment to be extremely old, but I remember when the hottest animation around was fucking Reboot, lmao. This show looks great!!

Oh shit, it was the internet!!! Gen Z all star!!! This show makes me feel so old but also I like that there’s more of a Gen Z feel to the youngin’s here, that’s 100% appropriate and I like it. It seems like the writing is tonally on point for the target demographic and below, which makes sense.

In a way it reminds me a bit of Ghost in the Shell, the way there’s this 3D space to navigate The Net.

Uh oh, an internet meme reference which is 15 years out of date. Maybe I spoke too soon?

An alligator alt-mode! I’m from Florida so this isn’t scary to me lmao, but hell yeah Beastformers!!! Fuck yes!!!

That flat ass landing for Soundwave. lmao just flat on the back! Fuck.

Evil white woman!!! uh oh

Yay, the family! I still really struggle with the family-intensive emphasis of this whole show so far, but I acknowledge that it’s because my own family is completely fucked up so all of these morals fall very short for me, personally. I do like that there’s a lot of focus on being together and achieving things as a collective unit of people, though. :)

I love Nightshade. Not just saying this because I also don’t believe in gender, but just in general, I love Nightshade.

This bitch is a living router!!! Yes!!! God, yes!!!

Episode: 12 // Beers: 3

How do they clean under the glove? Is the glove just a part of their hand? How integrated is it?

Home movies, fuck yes.

Anxiety son trying to choose his alt-mode reminds me a lot of 12 year old me trying to choose my gender. Relatable. 10/10

What a cute opening!!!! I don’t have siblings but is this what it’s like sometimes? Holy shit I was a lonely kid LMAO

I love Jawbreaker a lot.

Dot’s hairtie looks a lot like a FedEx parcel rubberband. Not hating on it, I’m just saying.

Oh shit this is going to be a home movie episode! YES YES YES

This reminds me of Rewind doing interviews of the Lost Light crew, I’m gonna fucking cry over the most basic shit lmaoooo

WiFi Queen watching her stories. PLAY TELEMUNDO

Jawbreaker is my son nobody fuck with him ever

oh no creative differences

WiFi Queen leave my son alone, no no no no

This reminds me way too much of all the videos teenagers made back in the day of Kingdom Hearts keyblade fights in Target parking lots and it’s truly, truly embarrassing but also very much a vibe

ARACHNAMECHS YOU HAVE MY ATTENTION

calm down Elita-One

Megatron like “when’s your fucking boyfriend gonna get here” lmao

MEGATRON INTERVIEW LET’S FUCKING GO

OH SHIT HISTORY LESSON

NO NO NO WIFI QUEEN STOP STOP STOP YOU ARE DOING EVERYTHING POSSIBLE TO SET OFF PTSD STOP

hashtag her name is hashtag

oh god he’s explaining his fucking tilt-rotor alt mode, I already made a post about why the alt mode is inherently funny but tl;dr these things suck IRL :(

oh shit are we getting an Elita-1 workout tape

this is kinda shitty of Elita actually, maybe slow down for the kid??? IDK

ok it’s nice now <3

oh shit!!! self-discovery!!!

uh oh foreshadowing that this video definitely won’t be just for him :(

the handling on that big ass van is not good, which makes sense

sibling themed lesson, not surprising-- seems like almost every episode so far in some way or another. not complaining, it’s just something I really can’t relate to personally at all so I’m naturally a bit disconnected

cute, edit with the scissors :’)

is this what it’s like to have a family that loves you? like they’re supportive and shit? that’s real????? that can happen? lol my family is so fucked up idk this is actually depressing me but it’s fine I like the show

Episode: 13 // Beers: 3

god I love Jawbreaker

Nightshade!! oh shit. I love them too

I LOVE Nightshade. lmao

Nightshade is me. I also do not want to go Do The Thing. I want to Do Some Bullshit.

Loner child!! Yes!!! They made a character for those of us that are only children lmao

CEMETERY YES YES YES

oh fuck are they about to learn about death

YES YES YES YES SPIDERS YES

YES HOLY SHIT YES TARANTULAS YES YES YES YES YES

PROTOFORM

UNAFFILIATED

SUFFICIENTLY NON-THREATENING

MOTHERFUCKER YES

PRONOUN INTRODUCTION YES

YES!!!! FUCK YES

HOLY SHIT

I’M SO QUEER THIS IS THE BEST EPISODE OF ANYTHING EVER

“YOU HAVE A MISSED CONNECTION” DON’T TELL HIM PROWL CALLED, STOP WHILE YOU’RE AHEAD

did this goggle wearing asshole just call them an “it”? did they ever say they used it pronouns? I might just be drunk I’ll have to rewatch later but uhhh

Nightshade is my favourite, but so is Tarantulas

IS HIS HOLOFORM DALE GRIBBLE FROM KING OF THE HILL WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON

HOLOFORMS!!!!

FUCK ME THIS IS GREAT

I LOVE TARANTULAS I LOVE HIM

IT’S SORT OF UPSETTING HOW MUCH I FEEL HIM RN BUT YOU KNOW WHAT FUCK IT THIS WHOLE EPISODE IS SO REAL FOR EXISTING

80S MUSIC SCIENCE MONTAGE YES YES YES

THEY’RE GIVING ME EVERYTHING!!!

oh no is it gonna take a turn now

“I chose to survive” FUCKING MOOD

no motherfucker he will NOT lose another child!!!!

YES DOT WITH THE REAL TALK <3 LOVE HER

god dammit! this is my favourite episode of this whole show so far

ha ha oh shit spider time!!

PARENT THEFT

OH MY GOD WE’RE DOING IT

I’VE ENTERED SICKO MODE

unsupervised only child behaviour, I can finally relate to something in this show!!! god bless!!!

PARTNER!! YES!!

honestly I get that it’s the Maltos so he’s wrong on this occasion but in general I am fully on board with Tarantulas at the moment, GHOST is some bullshit

BEASTMODE

BEASTMODE!!! FUCK YEAH FUCK YES HOLY SHIT

Tarantulas has a desire to adopt so strong that he’s wrongly evaluating the current situation, this was entirely predictable, if you know then you know lmao

OH FUCK I LOVE NIGHTSHADE’S NEW LOOK

HELL YEAH

fuck off Bumblebee

yeah I fucking love Nightshade’s new look, this RULES

YEAH TARANTULAS REDEMPTION ARC YES YES YES YES YES YES YES

FUCK GHOST I HATE GHOST

they’re just OK with this shit? what the fuck? I mean ok but also no it isn’t, what the fuck?

CREDITS, FUCK

THIS WAS THE BEST EPISODE. THIS WAS THE BEST ONE.

Episode: 14 // Beers: 3

oh fuck GHOST

had to pause to make some bagels at this point, lox and a schmear, hell yeah

god I love Nightshade’s new look so much

hate that WiFi Queen got stuck with a GHOST alt-mode, GHOST sucks so bad I hate them so much holy shit :( she deserves better but also I understand the Call of the WiFi

Schloder you asshole

lmao The Most Dad

the tea kettle is shaped like Bumblebee lmao, wait why is Schloder fondling it like his dick, I don’t like this

that’s not how lenses work

it’s OK Nightshade, I can’t do math either

oh shit is it gonna be Blurr, oh shit oh fuck

god the texture on Dot’s hair is so good

BREAKDOWN OHHH SHITTTT

STUNTICONS!!!

stupid deal, of course. there’s no plot without it

is this the Big Sister Syndrome I have heard so much about

oh shit evil white woman is back!!! Croft?

the three dipshit hipster GHOST members, lol

YEAHHHHH DOT

fuck, the white woman strikes again

YEAH FUCK UP GHOST

oh shit

BREAKDOWN FUCK YEAH

LMAO the license plate in Human Language too, fuck yeah, GHOST sucks

evil white woman!!!

holy shit that ruled also FEELINGS

FUCK GHOST

WHY IS EVERYONE OK WITH GHOST???? FUCK GHOST

this whole thing took 10 hours? damn

Episode: 15 /// Beers: 3

LOVE the discussion about which prosthetic to use <3

oh shit it’s a Mother’s Day episode

this is gonna be hard, I might have to punk out on this one for Fucked Up Family Reasons

love Nightshade <3 also hell yeah owl claws!!

ha ha oh shit a bear! FUCK

what the fuck happened with her prosthetic what bullshit is this

my mom used to be a ranger this sucks so bad like my relationship with my mom is NOT GOOD so this show is already hard to watch lmao but holy shit

super worms? fucking GHOST doing bullshit in the woods

the dial up sound L M A O

the way WiFi Queen says “picnic basket” is the same cadence famously used by Yogi Bear, for those who aren’t old as fuck and/or have never seen that show before

THE BEAR IS SATAN

I love Large Son

FUNGUS BEAR FUNGUS BEAR TOXIC WORM BEAR

oh shit Nightshade cruise mode!!

what the fuck the fungus bear became a new bear

DISPERSE THE GOO

I will talk a lot about the prosthesis lesson at a later date, 10/10 I like seeing this discussed on a show for kids

evil white woman is shaping up to be the Main Villain here

Episode: 16 // Beers: 4

oh fuck a flashback

oh fuck!!!

man it sucks to watch kids act out war. like yeah I know this is fiction but it’s also real and it sucks

looks like they finally set off PTSD in Megatron, way to go kiddos :( if I triggered my dad’s PTSD by playing with a ball or something I had the shit whipped out of me, so I hope the kids can fucking run because it’s not their fault anymore than it was mine IRL but I can feel the sting, oh nooo

Scottish Megatron was a great choice

HISTORY LESSON LET’S FUCKIN GO

HISTORY LESSON FROM MEGATRON LET’S GO FUCK YEAH

man this episode is actually already setting off my own PTSD!! nothing like family themed shows to really point out how fucked my own family is. gonna need more beers!!!

THE BLUE FLOWERS alright yeah this is gonna fuck me up real bad

hold on I’m getting another beer

shut the fuck up, kids-- IDK I know this is my own family trauma from war speaking here, but I would have absolutely had the fucking shit slapped out of me if I said or did anything during War Story Time. I’m like terrified they’re going to start getting beat for real in a minute here if they keep saying dumb shit :(

megatron has been patient so far but holy shit kids shut the fuck up

that having been said I am glad Megatron is better with kids than any of my family members lmao it’s not like I want them to get hit or anything, I’m just seriously on edge because I absolutely got traumatised when I like, breathed when my mom or dad was doing PTSD time and this feels like where that is going

“what do you know of the all spark” GET ‘EM MEGS, GET ‘EM WITH KNOWLEDGE

IDK how I feel about Dot alone being Meg’s turning point but we’ll see where this goes

very TFP-like, with restoration of Cybertron being the ultimate goal

Scots Meg, love it when the Scots comes through. shoulda just let the VA go full Scottish, that would rule

that having been said, oh fuck Shockwave!

I like his design, 50% Cyberverse, 50% G1.

OLD FRIEND LINE I’M LOSING MY MIND

really uncomfortable how much this reminds me of a couple war memorials I’ve been to IRL, Do Not Like but I understand they were going for this exact association it just sucks for what are probably obvious reasons

nobody bothered to secure Shockwave’s tube? ever?

“lower class cy-brids” oh FUCK

IT WAS A CLASS WAR, IDW/TFP influenced origin semi-confirmed for this continuity as well???

“we have just enough energon in us for those things to hurt” -- interesting

I love that the park insignia is a human fist grabbing a Cybertronian finger in a “handshake”

don’t spew centrist bullshit Megatron but war fucks with everyone’s heads so I don’t blame you.

although yes “don’t do leftist infighting” is very good advice, he’s not wrong about that.

Episode: 17 // Beers: 5

what the fuck is this underground dog fighting pit Cybertronian battle arena gladiatorial contest bullshit right the fuck here

ARE THEY IN FUCKING PHILLY

THEY ARE!!! THEY’RE IN FUCKING PHILLY

SHOUT OUT TO ALLEGHENY COUNTY!!!!

what weakass drumline is this, come on there are buskers better than this

WHERE’S GRITTY

PLEASE GRITTY

everyone is rude in Philly, these kids don’t know shit

also “city mileage” is literally going nowhere because traffic isn’t moving LMAO

oh shit a hipster is about to get Bad Timed

OH FUCK YEAH RED EYE OWL SUPERHERO TIME

YESSSSS OUR THEY/THEM HERO YES YES YES YES YES

no honey don’t breathe in the train vent air, you’re breathing in so much pollution, noooo

they’re encountering a white woman in the wild, oh no

OH NO THE WHITE WOMAN IS ENTICING THEM TO JOIN A PIT FIGHT

DON’T LISTEN TO STRANGE WHITE WOMEN DON’T DO IT, NO

god dammit!

none of the Philly people have good Philly voices but I expected this

NO SKATEPARK HAS AN AMERICAN FLAG ON IT THAT ISN’T VANADALISED, I CALL BULLSHIT IMMEDIATELY

Twitch is fucking up her paint so bad right now

fucked up graffiti, oh no :(

SHE/THEY PINS ON THE BACKPACK HELL YEAHHHHH

YEAHHH NIGHTSHADE CALLED IT OUT

QUEERS UNITE

YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH

I LOVE THIS SCENE SO MUCH

YESSSSSSSSSSS NON-BINARY DISCUSSION

YEAH YEAH YEAH FUCK YEAH

please god have a trans man on this show someday, please god

white woman quoting bugs bunny lmao fuck off

GUITAR CHILD IS RUNNING A PIT RING???

SOUNDWAVE COME GET YOUR KIDS

ha ha Bumblebee’s like what the fuck “we just wanted to see wrestling” LOL

lmao staged fight let’s go, WWE back in the late 90s early 2000s energy for real

are they gonna do the Hulk Hogan Mr. America lie detector test thing LMAOOOO

I like that the arena is made up of fucked up old subway cars though, that’s real Philly energy tbh

GRIMLOCK HA HAAAA GET FUCKED

no memory? also reference to IDW 1 Grimlock losing memory? idk I just want there to be as much IDW 1 in this as possible tbh

also fucking LOL Lazerbeak is doing amazing as the announcer

Mandroid!!

wait the mind control eyes were purple here and the bear with the fucked up fungus tentacle worm situation also had purple eyes but that was from the GHOST shit so I’m calling it now, the Mandroid shit and the GHOST shit is the exact same shit

lmao uh oh, fuck them humans

interesting how they said “we changed you” and he instantly said “you didn’t ruin anything”, uhhh not quite the same thing but also I’m drunk and this is a child character talking so I will revisit this later if need be

Stevie fucking sucks, very true, good lesson: friends that suck are not actually friends

OH SHIT REAL MISSION TIME IN PHILLY LET’S GO

I love that fucking owl alt mode so much, jesus christ

Episode: 18 // Beers: 5

humans are fucking shitty

very similar reveal shot to the shot in TFP where Ratchet and Optimus are looking around in the plague ship, 10/10 love it

oh fuck, Brawl’s toast

OH FUCK NICE SAVE LARGE SON

this scene looks great

Mandroid’s looking fucked up!

oh shit, Bot Brawls, there’s a name for it. and it’s just normal human bullshit, not related to Mandroid. yeah, that checks out. SIGH

EXTREMELY ANIME SHOT OF MANDROID

holy shit those cables really jammed in there

they made one of the worms from Tremors into a giant spider worm (not a sexy Tarantulas spider worm, like a bad one)

oh shit Hashtag’s mind controlled

ha ha holy fuck she just rocked Thrash

MENTAL BATTLE ZONE YEAHHH

this is fucked!!!

ha ha it’s fucking with Teslas, that kinda rules

HA HA YES IT’S ALL CARS WITH WIFI SHIT INVOLVED, YEAH I KNEW I DIDN’T TRUST THAT SHIT!!! I WAS RIGHT!!! THANKS FOR VALIDATING ME

can’t beat the internet, y’all are fucked pretty bad right now

obligatory “I know you’re in there” line

if the power of family is what defeats a microchip in this episode I’m going to be so fucking pissed off l m a o

I really wish this show would stop making me feel bad for having a shitty family at literally every opportunity, it really is sort of overbearing, but I’m also drunk right now so maybe I’m just being overly sensitive, but what about kids watching this with shitty families? like dude this is so genuinely painful

god fucking dammit

the power of family is what did it

I mean good, I guess, but also this just makes me feel like such shit lmaooo

also I’m an only child so I mean IDK what the fuck sibling love is LOL

if I took shots for every time they said the word “family” I’d be dead within 15 minutes, guaranteed

the little girl is the only one with any common sense lmao, I am too drunk to remember her name, I still have not eaten all day -- wait I lied I had 2 bagels

confirmed: Bot Brawls are the only option for Decepticons, it’s literally just a new version of gladiatorial battles on Cybertron (assuming that was also a thing in this continuity, seems likely but I don’t think they’ve mentioned it yet)

fucking bummer

I wouldn’t be laughing at a drained Bumblebee passing the fuck out but that’s just me, also apparently Cybertronians can snore despite having vents and no airways, maybe that’s different here for some reason, IDK

it could also be Bumblebee actively trying to put them at ease with the last bit of his energy in a subtle way as the Terrans/kids might not understand Cybertronian anatomy so this might not register to them as being weird, which is the option I prefer but this is just me thinking out loud

EVIL WHITE WOMAN!!! I TOLD YOU THE WHITE WOMAN WOULD BE THE REAL ENEMY!!!!! I TOLD YOU!!!!!

oh fuck she’s the pit fight organiser, because of course she is

OH SHIT ENERGON PATCHES. Mandroid’s reaction to it is a lot like TFP Megatron’s reaction to dark energon, hmmmm

“they’re all disposable” wow fuck you lady

also the shithead kid learned a lesson and fixed the graffiti, good

great ending frame on a deranged Mandroid

ALRIGHT SO THAT’S IT

I’m going to sleep now, will re-watch all of this sober once I have the time, just desperately wanted to see Tarantulas tbh LMAO and I do not regret it!!

#cw alcohol #cw alcohol mention #es spoilers #earthspark spoilers #tfes spoilers #tf earthspark spoilers #spoilers #tfe spoilers #maccadam #maccadams

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ladymaplecourt · 2 years ago

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Very proud of Moshe Rabbeinu for winning the @tanakhsexyman poll but tbh he was not the sexiest. While he's arguably the most important person in tanakh and everyone is right to love him, I believe we need an honorable mention for the hotties who didn't get the recognition they deserved:

1. The angel who wrestled with Jacob

The finalist who lost to Moshe and imo the sexiest on the list. See my explanation here.

2. Daniel

His epithet is The Most Beloved of Men for a reason! He was literally singled out by the king of Babylon for being the most intelligent and beautiful of the Jewish men. He stared down a lion until it begged for pets. He is so so sexy and the fact that he did not rank higher in this competition is criminal.

3. Joseph

As several other people have mentioned, Jospeh was known for his good looks. He greatly resembled his mother Rachel, who was so hot Jacob worked 14 years to win her hand. Joseph's looks and general attractiveness got him in trouble with Potifar and his wife, but may have also helped Joseph win over the Pharaoh. He knows he's hot and he's a bit cocky about it but it works for him. Truly a sexyman for the ages.

4. Boaz

Smart. Kind. Wealthy. Boaz was basically the Bruce Wayne of his day. Ruth took one look at him and decided that maybe marrying her cursed, deceased husband's family member wouldn't be so bad after all, and I get it. My only caveat is that people love to talk about how much he respected women and the poor, when his actual attitude in the text was more like "hmm this modest, well-behaved woman deserves more than her lot in life, I will help her if I can." Still, the bar is pretty low for biblical equality so I count Boaz as a win.

5. Jonathan (& David)

The hottest thing about Jonathanand David was their devotion to each other, but I would argue that Jonathan was the sexier of the two and was truly underrated in this competition. (Honestly, some of David's actions have turned me off of him. Sorry, King.) There is less information about Jonathan but everything we get about him is a delight; he betrayed his father for his boyfriend best friend, who then went on to write lavish praise about Jonathan's great attributes. And while David gets points for writing Shir Hashirim, who do you think inspired him to write it? One of David's 18 neglected wives? One of his young bedwarmers? Nah, it was Jonathan babey!

#jumblr #tanakh sexyman

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sweetmusingss · 1 year ago

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Renee actually flushed from your comment, loving how special you made her feel. She was grateful to be in the position that she was in and she did get complimented fairly often. That wasn't her being self-centered either, it was just the truth when she was living life in the public eye. Despite that though, a compliment from you meant so much more to her. She smiled kindly at everyone who spoke to her on the way to the bar with you. She was grateful for the support and excited about the movie coming out but really, she just wanted to focus on you tonight and spend tonight with you. She wanted to take advantage of the two of you being together in person. It was way better than communicating over text. She continued to hold your hand, her fingers laced with yours as she sat beside you. She ordered your favorite fruity drink, knowing exactly what you liked and not even having to ask. She got the same for herself, finding herself wanting to impress you and win you over. "I will try my best not to threaten you tonight but no promises," she smirked at you. "How are you doing though, Nay?," she asked you, using the nickname that others called her on you too. She was a really empathetic person and while people were making tonight about her, she was more focused on you.

“Oh you can threaten me any time. I didn’t say I didn’t like it.” I scooted my bar stool closer to hers so I could hear her properly, totally not because I just wanted to be closer to her. I knew she probably had responsibilities tonight, she probably should be off doing press interviews or something, but knowing Renee, she was doing whatever she wanted… media and publicity be damned. I also couldn’t help but swoon over the fact that she was still holding my hand, rubbing my thumb along her soft skin. “I can’t believe you remember my drink order and we haven’t drank together in months. Real one, you are.” I smile at her, Renee having a special way of making you feel like the only person in the room when she locked her attention onto you. “I’m good. I just got back from a European tour which was fucking insane but incredible. I’m so tired. Not nearly as tired as you I’m sure, but I could fall asleep if you gave me a pillow.” I laugh quietly, thanking the bartender when he brought over our drinks. “Cheers to the hottest Regina George this world has ever seen. Yes, even hotter than Rachel McAdams!” I wink at her, bringing my glass to hers with my free hand and clinking it with hers before taking a long sip. “How are you doing with all this?”

I exhale slowly, being able to see right through your fake smiles. I was surprised you even bothered but maybe you could tell that if you really told me how you were truly feeling, I probably would have cried. I run my hand over my ponytail, about to walk away before Don was approaching me. We had interacted a few times now and he was really nice to me. I knew he was a personal trainer here and it was nice making a friend at work, especially being new here. "Yeah, I walked right into him. I was trying to read the board and I spilled his drink all over him. He is definitely not my biggest fan," I sigh softly. "Does he come here often? I might need to look for different employment," I say, having no idea that the two of you were such good friends.

“He comes here about 5 times a week… he’s one of my good friends, actually. Big work out guy. But yeah, he’s a grump.” Don makes a face when you say you spilled the smoothie on him, knowing Seb wouldn’t let that go so easily. If you were a guy, there would’ve been a screaming match unfolding already but Don got the feeling that Seb may have found you pretty so he didn’t make quite a fuss as he would’ve normally. “Don’t let him get to you. He’ll come around eventually… just never spill another drink on him ever.”

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cottagehowell · 1 year ago

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Hello it’s SRS once again!! Hope you’re having a beautiful week :)

These dances sound AMAZING and I love that you incorporate classic rock into the routines and that it strikes such a chord with students! You know for sure 10 years down the line one of these kids will hear come together or something and inadvertently launch into an entire choreographed routine, much to the confusion of everyone around them lol. Have you danced/taught dance for a long time or is it a newer role for you?

OK good to know about the albums!! I am growing increasingly intrigued by the monkees based on your wild & crazy tales and would LOVE some recs!! What songs/albums/etc. would you recommend to get started?

Also yes please tell me about the Mike nesmith imprinting!! I see his name everywhere & am curious to understand the full psychological reasons why you have grafted on to him like a chick to a mother hen

Congratulations on officially having finished your finals!! I hope they went swimmingly :) do you have any plans you’re looking forward to for winter break (if you have a winter break)?

Also you’re a CS major? So brave I truly could never. I barely know how to use a computer let alone make it do NEW things… crazy & wildly impressive. What draws you to computer science?

I study environmental biology! Very fun huge fan but yes the amount of extra labs etc. is crazy. I will actually need to learn R or something next semester for a biostats class but that’s a problem for later… I literally tried to download R on my computer this summer but got stuck on that for an hour and gave up 😭

Have a WONDERFUL time relaxing from the stress of finals!! Hope you get up to something fun this week <3

Omg so sorry for going mia for a week….. now that the semester’s over my sense of time has gone out the window 💀

Your finals were this week, right? I hope they went well!! Sending you all the good vibes 🩵🩵🩵 Do you have any fun plans for your break?

I started dance when I was 2 (lol) and started teaching when I was 17!! So I’ve been teaching for a little while but not like forever lol

I think their first album is a good place to start!! It has more of a pop vibe but has some really catchy songs and sometimes gets a little psychedelic. Last Train to Clarksville was the big hit from that album. I’d also recommend listening to the soundtrack from their movie Head, the music is really really good. You probably already know I’m a Believer and Daydream Believer, so beyond that I’d recommend For Pete’s Sake, Early Morning Blues and Greens, Randy Scouse Git, Listen to the Band, Pleasant Valley Sunday, Goin’ Down, Words, Auntie’s Municipal Court, and Magnolia Simms. The four of them have such different musical influences, so I tried to get a little bit of everything here!

In all honesty, it’s mostly just that Mike is hot. (I think he’s at his hottest mid 70s through mid 80s, but he’s still really cute in the first season of the show as well. Plus in the pilot he looks so young!! Baby.) But he was also really talented and influential even though he never gets credit for it bc of the stigma against the monkees. He was a pioneer of country rock as a genre! He was a major player in the development of music video as we know it today! He created the direct predecessor of MTV and won the first Grammy for music video! He got into VR in the 90s! His mom invented Liquid Paper! The man is fantastic for trivia. On the show, he’s kind of the leader of the group, so I think that also contributes to the cult of personality. When you get into analyzing his gender and sexuality, it gets really interesting really fast. Also he’s an only child raised by a single mom, so he’s kinda sensitive in a way that resonates with me bc I’m an only child too :) But it’s very important to note that he was a complete asshole while the monkees were a thing and also he was a total dick to his first wife (Phyllis deserves so much better, she’s such a queen). So we stay #mikecritical while still thirsting over him. Oh and also his solo work is really wonderful if you’re into country :)))

Glad to be done with finals, yes! I got a 98 on my database exam, which pushed me up to an A from an A- :) I had a project that I finally turned in this past Sunday, so finals week dragged on a little longer than I would’ve liked, but I’m done now!! In January I’m gonna be spending a couple days at a friend’s house, and I haven’t seen her in several years, so I’m super excited :))) also I’m looking at taking a tap dance workshop later this month which will be lots of fun!

What’s really interesting to me about CS is the logical thinking & math aspect, like I enjoy being able to turn my people brain off and just think like the machine. It’s like a logic puzzle which is fun for me :) Plus the sense of accomplishment for having made something! Usually “making” something refers to more creative areas, so CS is kind of unique in that way. And then when your code works there’s that moment of “look!! I made it do the thing!!!”

Omg tell me more about environmental bio!! How did you become interested in it? It’s so cool when people are into more specialized areas of science bc there’s like a whole new world to hear about!! And best of luck with R 🫡 I’ve never had to use a functional language so you’ll have to let me know what it’s like!

I can’t believe Christmas is so close!! It really snuck up on me!! Do you have any traditions/events you’re looking forward to? Staying in bed half the day post-finals?? (That’s what I’ve been doing 🙃) Any hobbies you’re excited to have time for over break?

Much love, talk to you soon!! 🩷🩷🩷

#srs23

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btscontentenjoyer · 2 years ago

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There is such a specific feeling that comes with reading any part of 3tan that I don't think I could ever fully explain.

But I think it's kind of like this part. Like getting together with people you care so much about on a nice summer day. People who you've seen and supported through their worst and vice versa. The 3tan couple feel to me like my best friends who I'm always rooting for because they make me believe in love and that there's someone out there who's exactly right for each of us. Rereading parts of this series feels like recalling stories that never get old or looking back on fond and special memories with friends. It's just such a genuine comfort and each character is so well-established that every time I laugh at their antics it feels like I've known them my whole life.

That being said, I was feeling this so much in this part, feeling like I was there, that the notes I took are mostly just reactions and exclamations lmao. But I feel like they illustrate my point quite well, so here they are.

"Prepared, you bring your weapon of choice to the door: a spoon, slathered with delicious batter, and your tongue in just a second." Lmaooo my eyebrows actually raised when I read that. I always love when OC gets like that but I feel like it also always backfires because Yoongi manages to be the bigger menace somehow.

"A hat, a tank, and the jewelry you love to hate." 😫😫😫

"Except now, your sundress is a lot more revealing than the last. And it’s very obviously covering your two-piece, a new one that you’re only confident enough to wear because of the man standing at the door." Double 😫😫😫. Hottest couple in the world award absolutely goes to them. Maybe fate made them have to hide their relationship for a while because the world is not ready to witness them in all of their glory yet. I know I'm not, and yet I want it so bad 😔😔😔

"But based on all the talk you keep hearing, it seems like the week was long for everyone, so you can deal with the labor if it makes them feel better. With a soft huff, you think that even you yourself can benefit from your cooking at this point." Pls OC is so sweet 🥺🥺🥺

"You can’t let something like that get to you, especially given all the ways Yoongi’s proven himself." So so nice to see OC remind herself of this, the way her mindset is changing is truly awe inspiring.

"If your brother is paying for your groceries, his best friend is paying for your hospital bills." Lmaoooo he really should. What a damn menace!

“Go outside,” Reia gently interrupts while Yuri chuckles. “Tell us what you’re making and we’ll do it.” Cute cute cute.

"Completely missing both rolls of paper towels on the table by the grill." Pffffft. He is so!!!!!

“Both of you deserve to be happy,” she finally says, and you feel a slight pang in your chest. “Out of all the people I know, I’ve always wished good for you two the most.” 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

"Shiv is unwavering. “Yeah! Isn’t it heavy?” Shiiiiiv. I love Shiv! But also he's wasting his time on OC because she is way too whipped for a certain someone lmaooo.

“Tae! Wait, you brought”—a squeal flings out of your mouth when you spot Yeontan, arguably your favorite among the two partygoers—“My baby!” Eeeeep the star of this chapter!!!!

“He almost kissed me.” There's something so special about the fact that OC can share these things with at least one person. Because I could totally see how all of this would be overwhelming, I don't know how she's able to keep quiet about it. But Tae really is such a good friend and I'm so glad she has him 🥺

"Even though you’re having a wonderful time, you knew that something was missing. But why does that something have to be in reach and unreachable? Why does having him closer hurt worse?" 😭😭😭😭😭

“This fucking dress,” he rumbles low, fisting a bunch in one of his hands before pressing it to your hip. “Fuck this bet, I’d take you right now if you let me.” Brooooooo. I have no words lmao just 😳😳😳

“Dude. Your back looks fucked.” Aaaaah the line!!!!! I love it when they're put in these situations lmao. It's kinda funny watching them scramble for excuses and get all flustered. It's not as funny thinking about the inevitable confrontation when bro actually finds out one day though. I'm actually surprisingly excited about that, even though I feel like there will definitely be some angst before things get better.

"There was a night where you think you went too hard. But that was after a long ass day, and you knew the two of you didn’t have enough time." 😳😳😳

“And what’s her at.” Fr lmaooo, that's a fair question.

"One day, one day, one day soon, maybe that can happen in this universe, too." Yes, it will happen, it has to 🥺

"You bolt back home, wings flapping in your chest when he drops the backpack and crushes your little hop in one last hug. His grin makes this kiss one of the ones you’ll remember forever, and you wanna etch the way his damp hair feels in your fingers right alongside it." 'bolt back home'... home only referring to the house or to Yoongi too 🥺🥺🥺

“I’m gonna keep wearing them until you pick.” Love love love when OC is like this! I just love seeing them teasing each other and being happy, I hope soon they can do it freely too.

“Okay, well your name is Shimmy right now so do that. In more.” Aaah I saw all the asks talking about Dom and Shiv and I totally agree that it would be a cute dynamic.

"He did love holding the camera back then." I really want to know more about OC and Jungkook's history and I'm sure we'll get to at some point. I need to know all of the reasons behind their break up so that I know whether to keep being endeared by him or not lmaooo.

"Fuck, is that a lollipop?" 🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴

"jackson trash [12:51am]: Made it home. I don’t know how I ever stayed out so late, y’all, I am tired! This is ridiculous." Lmaoooo I can't with their screen names.

"The second thought is one you can’t fully explain, but your heart is definitely warmer. It’s almost fact that you can’t be any safer than this." Aaaw I feel the same way after reading this.

"Rinsing soap from your sunkissed arms, you wonder what would happen if that wasn’t the case anymore. If Yoongi could spend more nights here, too, filling a void that has been looming over these walls ever since…" Man, OC and bro really must have gone through a lot huh 😔😔😔 No wonder he's so protective of her.

"Yoongi [2:37am]: You up?" Hehehe I saw that 3tan lollipop is already in your plans and I completely support it of course.

Gosh this was just... it seriously just made me smile the whole time I was reading it. I love all of these characters, I love that each of them has a unique and individual personality and I loved seeing them all together like this and having so much fun. I feel like the next part of the main story line will be a bit more serious, so a light chapter like this full of teasing seems just right.

summer bbq (3tan) | myg

title: summer bbq pairing: 3tan!yoongi x reader(f) series: masterlist | three tangerines | fireworks | house party | basketball | stay | sidewalk talk | friends | dalo | like that | anytime | sundress season | yoongi’s interlude | forfeit | flutter | video call rating/genre: pg13 (18+) ; angst , fluff ; brother’s best friend au, implied age gap au summary: the summer cookout at your place is fun as hell despite the way you have to avoid yoongi looking like sin incarnate. but when he gets asked an unavoidable question, you suddenly feel exposed. and very, very cold. note: this is a drabble for the three tangerines series! undisclosed whether it’s in the main storyline or not, so it’s a standalone for now. also, this is for the person that sent the first bbq message, the people that also wanted this drabble, 🍰 anon for the belated bday gift, and everyone else that is looking forward to anything 3tan! thank you for digging me out of a creative slump and rejuvenating my spirit fr<3 note 2: i have what you call a… proposition for y’all. at the end. ehehehehe see you on the other side! warnings: …this yoongi is just unfair🥴🥴, language, alcohol consumption, house parties, uhhh some food play sdkjlf, uhhhh lollipops lol, jimin is a little shit, but so is yoongi!!, body worship lmfao, tense situations, angst :((, kissing as a warning uh huh, kitchen as a warning you know how it is, chains :))))), yoongi in a tank, yoongi on the phone lmfao, wet yoongi l o l, just all the yoongi’s i fear, shiv raises some brows..?, there’s some rly cute moments in this :’)), despite all the menace-ry loll drop date: march 27th, 2023, 12:30am est word count: 9.6k💀💀💀

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“Hey, Yoongi’s at the door!”

Keep reading

#also absolutely loved tannie's appearance in here 🥺🥺🥺#yoongi fic recs #ivi reads

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