#but i think i way overcorrected mentally and now just assume nothing is a symptom. askfhalfjlsjda

[flamingothing]

think im really struggling to find the middleground between "not pathologizing all my behaviours" and "these are textbook symptoms of the disorders i have"

[autistalk]

Comorbidity: Awesome word, less awesome thing.

Comorbidity is a hell of a drug. I'm Corey, and this is Autistalk.

In a previous post I used the term "an oroborus of bullshit," and while it was completely accurate in that context, I'm slightly disappointed I didn't save it for this one. It is, after all, pretty much a perfect definition of comorbidity. But if we're trying to be slightly more appropriate about things, comorbdity is simply the presence of multiple conditions. That's it! Fairly simple, right? But comorbodity is pretty much the bane of my existence.

While these conditions don't have to be related, more often than not they feed into each other. Anxiety, autism, depression, ADHD, OCPD... not the most cheerful of combinations, but one I've seen far too often. See, the thing is that no mental illness exists in a vacuum, and a lot of them tend to have issues that are similar, or at the very least, overlap. I get anxious because I'm depressed, and I get more depressed because I'm anxious. "Vicious cycle" doesn't even begin to cover it. But, for as much of a pain as comorbidity is, being aware of it can be quite helpful when it comes to figuring out issues.

See, for a lot of people on the spectrum (and for a lot of disabled people in general), they get the one diagnosis, and that's it. You don't need another one, because all of your problems can be wrapped up in one little box. Slap a puzzle piece ribbon on it, and you're done, right? Unfortunately, that myopic point of view can do far more harm than good.

My younger brother was diagnosed at a very early age, but when I was younger knowledge of Autism wasn't anywhere near as widespread. I was "smart but lazy," "a bad kid," all that jazz. It didn't help that I tested in the 99th percentile, or that my survival responses to Autism typically involved overcorrecting in an effort to seem "normal." There was nothing to diagnose that couldn't be solved with discipline.

I was diagnosed with ADD when I was around 10 or 11, and that lasted about eight months. A long-term bad reaction to Adderall and unwillingness to put me on Ritalin had people exploring other diagnoses, and eventually I was tested for Aspergers. That diagnosis fit almost all of my symptoms, and made sense with my family's history, so that was pretty much it. I assumed the ADD was just a misdiagnosis, and spent the next thirteen years referring to it as one. No one bothered correcting me there, so why would I think any differently? Besides, you needed meds for ADD, amd clearly the meds didn't work on me.

But I've always had issues with my attention span. There's only so much that can be explained by the autistic tendency to hyperfocus. Frankly, I should have been clued in all of the times I stopped being interested in a special interest in order to hyperfocus on something utterly trivial, like the number of bumps in my ceiling, or loops in my bedroom rug. Just one of those weird 'tism quirks, or at least that's what I told myself.

It wasn't until I had to get a copy of my medical records when I was 22 that I discovered I was still technically diagnosed with ADD. It threw me off, because I had spent so long accepting one thing as part of my life, and learning to be okay with that, while assuming that another thing had nothing to do with me!  Autism had become a large part of my self-identity, and I'd spent 11 years coming to terms with that. I researched the hell out of it, and learned as much as I could about what my condition entailed, coping mechanisms, and what sort of things I could expect. Obviously, all the answers weren't out there- It's A Spectrum (TM), and Autism presents uniquely to each person. When I couldn't find answers, or the ones I found didn't work, I figured it was just because I was unlucky with a condition that is even now not fully understood. It didn't even occur to me that I had only been asking part of the question.

Most of my coping mechanisms still relate specifically to Autism. While there's no real "main diagnosis" there, it's still the one I tend to mentally default to, in large part because of the massive overlap Autism has with many other mental illnesses. But these days I'm learning more about the other stuff I have going on, and I'm finding new techniques that are really helping me out. If someone had sat me down when I was eleven and said "Hey, you have this, but you also have this, and here's how that's gonna suck," I'd probably have been a lot better adjusted. If you're young and on the spectrum, it's worth taking a look at your habits and behaviors to see if there might be something else going on. Autism in particular has a pretty high comorbidity rate, so it definitely doesn't hurt to think about it. If you're in a position where you have a doctor you trust, consider talking to them about it! If not, maybe do some research on your own. A lot of people only put stock in professional diagnoses, but it's worth noting that most of those only come about because you or someone close to you notices things. You're not gonna go in for a physical and have them be "oh, by the way, looks like you've got some depression right around there" while they're checking your tonsils. If you already have an idea, or list of things going on, it can help you and your doctor to narrow things down.

So, readers, what are your thoughts on comorbidity? Do you have multiple conditions? I'm willing to bet that almost all of you have a good ol' case of Sensory Processing Disorder - believe it or not, while that's so common in Autistic folks it's often thought of as a given, it's not universal! If you have any feedback, or anything you'd like AutisTalk to cover, drop us a line in the ask box, submission page, Twitter, or gMail.