#but i still spent a short while on it sob

[gguk-n]

hey could you maybe write a lando x reader where when it was clear that lando lost the championship the reader just comforts him but he is distancing himself from her but she doesn’t give up on him so pls a happy end ❤️

established relationship, not very angsty, short

My World Champion

Things had been rough between the pair for a few months. With the mounting pressure on Lando to perform had left him pushing all those close to him away. He wasn't very happy with it but he felt like maybe he could focus better. The person who had to deal with the brunt of Lando's distance was his girlfriend, Y/N. They'd been together for a while and friends for longer. They just got each other like no other but lately Y/N felt like she didn't know Lando as well as she used to.

Y/N did try to bring up the distance. It was Azerbaijan, "Lan, don't you think we barely talk" Y/N spoke slowly, trying to start a conversation with her boyfriend who was sat across from her on the sofa. He didn't bother to even look up, "What's there to talk about when I'm busy trying to win a championship. Let me focus" he huffed. "I didn't mean it like that. I just thought we could spend some time together" Y/N trailed off. "We are sat together right now. How much more time do you want to spend with me?" Lando sighed and finally looked up from his laptop. "I just" she felt her voice die in her throat. 'I don't remember the last time we kissed Lan' her brain thought as she got up and left the room before another fight ensued.

It was during the winter break when things were starting to look up. Lando had just won the Singapore GP, he was more attentive and present; they even cuddled the whole day. Y/N thought that she had her boyfriend back. Oh how wrong she was because as soon as they were back on track; Lando was back to square one. The Austin loss hit deep, making Lando double down on strategising and spending every waking hour with the team or thinking about Formula One. It was like he forgot Y/N existed or for that matter himself. She would sit there and stare at her boyfriend who looked more and more like a stranger with each passing day.

Things had become rocky between them. She felt the divide growing with each passing weekend. Mexico wasn't any better. But Brazil landed a huge blow to Lando. He shut down, he stopped talking to anyone and spent all his time scrolling on his phone. There was nothing she could do without Lando walking out or shutting the door on her face. So, she sat and waited. She would cook his favourite food or leave out his favourite snacks to munch on. But she didn't make much break through on him; as he still chooses to stay reserved, opting to carry the burden alone.

It was after the Las Vegas quali, when Y/N noticed the light begin leave Lando's eyes. All she could offer were words and cuddles but Lando had put up a wall between them. The bed seemed too big for the two of them with either on each side. She stared at the space in between them wondering when it had gotten this big.

After the race, Y/N sighed a sigh of relief. The Championship battle was over and that meant she got her Lando back. She saw glimpses of him when he congratulated Max and couldn't wait to jump into his arms. But it was like Lando was back, just not for her.

That night, they spent it like any other, on either side of the bed. But as Y/N tried to fall asleep, she felt the bed shake. On further inspection, she saw Lando's frame quietly shaking from the sobs as he tried to not make any noise. Her heart hurt watching him, she slowly scooted over causing Lando to stop crying for a moment. She wrapped her arm around his torso and buried her head in his neck. "I love you, my world champion" she whispered causing Lando to turn around. His face was streaked with tears which she carefully wiped off. "I don't like it when you cry" she muttered and pecked his lips. "I thought you fell asleep" Lando mumbled. "Can't sleep without my cuddles" she quipped. "But, I'm not the world champion" was all he muttered, remembering her first comment. "For the world, no. For me, always" she smiled. Lando searched her eyes for anything, but all he found was undeterred love. "And you're not angry?" he asked. "No. I'm happy to watch you compete for the championship because I know, sooner or later you'll win it. Just waiting for that day" she reassured. "I'm sorry for being a dick. I was just" Lando spoke before she cut him off, "over whelmed. I know. But you didn't have to do it all alone. What am I here for?" she spoke tenderly. "I love you" he whispered kissing her for the first time in a long time. "I love you too, muppet" she whispered back. He looked at her for a long time as his hands pulled her closer, running along her frame; "What would I do without you?" he asked. "Crash and burn" she chided. "Agreed" he mumbled pulling her in for another kiss. "You alway know how to make me happy" he mumbled in between kisses. "Only when you listen to me. Otherwise you're Mr Grumpy" she chuckled. "I promise not to be Mr Grumpy anymore" he laughed kissing her again. "Next time I'm grumpy, kiss me. I think all my worries melt away with your kisses" he said pressing her against him. "So, the next time you start an argument, I'm gonna kiss you" she said cupping his cheeks. "Best way to end an argument" he smiled pressing their foreheads together. "I won't disagree" she kissed him again, making up for all the lost time.

[miupow]

★ ── LE SEXE, JE VEUX DIRE ! [MAKNAE LINE]

what happens when you give the maknae line an aphrodisiac 。 。 。?

꒰୨୧ ꒱ pairing。stray kids maknae line x fem!reader genre。 pure smut , pwp warnings。 aphrodisiacs , sex while intoxicated , mutual masturbation , unprotected sex , vaginal fingering , oral (f. and m. rec) , spanking , cowgirl position , face sitting , squirting , overstimulation

a/n ⸝⸝ requested maknae line version of my hyung line drabble! [ 0. 6k words ] ⸝⸝ [ m. list ]

𝓙ISUNG

god, he’s already so needy just as he is… losing all self control instantly, shoving his hand down his sweats to pull out his thick cock before you can even reach for him. masturbating together on either side of the couch, greedy eyes watching eachother get off, jisung’s cock growing harder and harder with every stroke of his hand, every circle of your fingers against your swollen clit. unable to stop yourselves until you’ve both cum, the cushions wet and sticky from your combined releases— jisung doesn’t care as he shreds the clothes off of the both of you, tugs you down to meet him as he guides his already stiffening cock against your drenched hole. you’ll fuck until you can’t anymore, the both of you drained completely dry, embraced in eachothers arms as you lay spent on the ruined couch. “let’s do that again,” jisung giggles into your hair, “that was fun!”

𝓕ELIX

felix is always more of a giver than a receiver, and nothing could be truer than when he’s under the spell of an aphrodisiac. all he wants is to please you, make you feel good, let him give himself entirely to you so you can drown in pleasure. opening you up on his fingers slowly and expertly, making sure you feel every inch of his short fingers inside of you, his rough fingertips pressing just right against your gummy sweet spot as he plays with your clit in his other hand. bringing you to the edge over and over, making you cum until your juices drip down his wrists. it’s like he gets stuck in some kind of trance, unable to pull himself away or stop himself from touching you, kissing you, loving you. finally breaking out of it when you cry out loudly and tug at his hair, his own deep moan intertwining with yours as you sob out for his cock instead. and of course lixxie is going to give it to you, he’d do anything you asked.

𝓢EUNGMIN

you made him this way, seungmin grumbles, when you let out a pathetic hiccup of “t-too much!” , your voice garbled and ruined from his cock in your mouth. it’s your responsibility to fix the mess you made, on your hands and knees swallowing his cock down your throat, little hand stroking what couldn’t fit— seungmin reaches over you to land a harsh slap to your ass, snickering at the way you gag and choke around him. you’re just a toy for his pleasure, a sex doll for him to use to get off; ordering you to serve him and take it all like the good girl he knows you are. his fingers tangling in your hair, his pretty cries he tries to hold in, take it like he knows you love it and he’ll reward you with his hot cum down your throat and his cock speared deep in your pussy. maybe he’ll even give you a creampie, if you beg prettily enough.

𝓙EONGIN

innie gets so thirsty for pussy when he’s given an aphrodisiac, absolutely shameless in rolling over onto his back and begging you to sit on his face. he’ll eat you with your clothes still on, he doesn’t care one bit— pulling your skirt up to your waist and tugging your wet panties to the side with his teeth before diving into your cunt. and he really wants you to sit, put all of your weight on him, don’t worry, he’s strong enough! tugging you down onto his face when you hover over him, too nervous to fully sit down, “c’mon, i said sit!” his big veiny hands constantly wandering all over your body as he eats you out like a starved man, his nose bumping your clit as he gropes at your exposed ass and tits, your little waist, your plush thighs. make him breathless , smother him with your pussy— and watch him cum in his sweatpants as he makes you squirt on his tongue, his pretty whines and whimpers muffled by your thighs.

[melanchoire]

meyaa!! thoughts on giselle who is so horny for gp!reader that she would let them do anything they wanted? literally anything. she would let them take her from behind, breed her, make her use a leash and fuck her like the needy slut she is, etc.

this ask caught my attention since i received it and i spent all day thinking about it...

cw: breeding, creampie, riding, unprotected sex (👎🏻)

giselle would be a complete pervert for this 😭 i mean giselle has a hot girlfriend that she loves to show off but you just happen to not match her freak? she can’t believe it!

she always goes to big lengths to get you to make a move. for example, giselle finds comfort in tank tops or shorts, so she decides to wear the dirtiest, shortest clothes possible to get a comment from you? of course! although she gets a little disappointed when you don’t seem to be too affected. maybe she asked you how it looks and you say fine, but she is like “🤨” because she doesn't understand why you’re not jumping on her and ripping her clothes off her body!

and gigi has to take matters into her own hands, climbing onto your lap and sitting in a position that ensures your cock is against her ass, taking your hands and positioning them on her tits while saying “fuck me” SIMPLE but effective 🙂‍↕️ she really enjoys seeing how the surprise appears on your face and you look speechless given her daring actions, but she was focused on giving you a stern look and a serious tone that made it clear that she wasn’t joking!

you know giselle usually posts pictures from time to time where she is lying on her stomach, right? well, that's because it’s her favorite position I KNOW. giselle enjoys nothing more than lying comfortably and being fucked without having to be in an uncomfortable position that makes her very tired or makes her body sore

and as anon said, giselle is a slut! i think she loves rough treatment because it turns her on and also brings an involuntary smile out of her 😭 like she may be burying her face in the pillows but she wants you to pull her hair hard and make her lift her head, she doesn’t mind if you pull her locks in a way that makes her grimace and sob a little! she loves pain and doesn’t care much about a simple hair pull when she has worse and more twisted ideas in mind 💕

obviously you use protection because you want to take care of yourself and your girlfriend at all times, but giselle doesn’t seem to care 😧 often asking you to breed her and give her your babies, a statement that always leaves you frozen in place like a statue and almost makes you rethink the entire existence of humanity 🤕 and you always pull out of her before you cum! maybe cumming on her tummy, thighs or lower back, but that always pisses giselle off! always giving you an annoyed look, clicking her tongue and sometimes arching an eyebrow while tilting her head, whatever the option, you were scared of giselle’s reaction! 😣

then imagine one day she is riding you, making your head spin and your mind in the clouds until you notice you’re close!

“love, i need to cum—”

“don’t even try to do it. you’re not going to take it off.” oh 😳

no matter how hard you try to free yourself from her, giselle is more agile and stronger! as you tried to place your hands on her hips to lift her off your lap, she would grab your wrists, holding them above your head and pinning you to the bed while she rides you with quick and precise hip movements that were making you slowly lose your mind 🥴

and even though you kick and struggle with giselle, you end up cumming inside her, filling her belly with all your seed; a problem and a risk for you, but a dream come true for giselle 💕

your body rests limp on the mattress, your chest rising and falling with your eyes closed. but giselle's voice manages to bring you out of your trance. “don’t give up now. you still have to make it up to me for all those times you wasted all those loads of cum.” and you know it’s going to be a long night…

[moody-alcoholic]

On a Wing and a Prayer

Part 3 - The First 24 Hours

This 'short' dribble is getting out of control. Also reader is a medic now... I have a thing for medical dramas.. CW: PTSD, mental health, panic attacks, little bit of comfort.

Previous parts - masterlist - next

You don’t want to stay in the med-bay. You want to get out of the sterile room to somewhere you feel comfortable. Which is hard to find while you’re still stuck on a base. You go to your room trying to ignore and avoid as many people as you can. 

You catch people whispering out the corner of your eyes, there’s probably not been anything this interesting happening in months. It’s not everyday special forces turn on one of their own, it’s not everyday they torture one of their own. 

You make it back to your room. It’s just the way you left it. Now it feels empty. 

There would be times when you would come back from a long day of training to find Simon laid on your bed with a cigarette between his lips, or Johnny sitting crossed legged with a book ready to talk your ear off about his day. 

That’s never going to happen again, you never want them in your space again. When you make it over to the bed you see a letter with your name on it. You recognise the handwriting it’s John’s. You don’t want to open it, your eyes go to the trash bin in the corner of your room. That's the only place it belongs. 

Your curiosity gets the better of you though. 

You sit down picking it up, your hands shaking, you’re holding your breath as you open it. You don’t even make it past the first line of the word vomit apology before you don’t want to read it any more. There is no use in them trying to reconcile with you. You fold it closed. Simon’s lighter is still there on the crate you turned into a bedside table. You pick it up, it makes you mad. 

You hate them, you hate what they put you through. You thought they loved you. You thought they would be on your side believing everything you said. Instead they hurt you, over and over for days. You found out from Kyle it had been 4 days. It felt longer. 

You bring the lighter up to the letter and set it on fire. You hold it in your hand watching as the flames disintegrate it into nothing. You drop it on the floor when it's about to reach your fingers and stamp it out. The knock at your door makes you jump. Your heart is pounding in your chest. 

“It’s me.” Kyle calls. You walk over opening it. He smiles at you but you don’t smile back. 

“He’s awake. He’s asking for you.” Kyle says. You let out a sigh of relief. He made it, thank god he made it. You follow Kyle in silence back to the med-bay. You walk past the room you slept in last night. Well slept wasn’t really the right word. Everytime you close your eyes, you're back in that room, with the snakes and the water. Two hours you think you go in total, spent the rest of the night having panic attacks until a nurse found you sobbing in a corner. 

The doctor wants you to speak to a psychiatrist. ‘Yeah? So I can be discharged? I want to work.’ That was met with sighs and a prescription for sleeping pills. Kyle stops just outside Johnny’s room. He turns to you and sighs.

“John and Simon are already here.” He says, it makes your stomach twist. You haven’t seen them since you left the room. You don’t want to see them, but you want to see Johnny. 

“It’s okay.” You lie. Kyle sighs again, you can tell by the expression on his face he’s sorry. 

“They don’t want to tell Johnny about what happened. They’re worried it will upset him. He’s only just woke up, the doctors want to give him a few days. Make sure he’s stable.”  

“Is that the doctor's decision on John’s?” You snap. You’re mad, you don’t want to lie to Johnny. Kyle doesn’t answer, instead he presses his lips together running his hand over his head. You sigh looking into the room, you can see John and Simon stood by the bed blocking your view of Johnny. 

It doesn’t matter who said it, they're right. Johnny needs rest, he needs to recover, he’s been in a coma for almost a week any stress could be dangerous. 

“I won’t say anything.” You say letting out a breath. Kyle smiles and reaches forward to grab your hand. You move it away so he can’t crossing your arms instead. You have to calm down or it’s going to be harder than it already is. 

Kyle walks in the room and you follow after. You try not to look at them but you can’t help it. Luckily Johnny pulls your attention away.

“Where have you been hiding lass? I thought you'd never leave my side!” He calls as you make it round to the other side of the bed and hug him. He groans in pain as he leans forward. You hope he can’t feel how hard your heart is beating. 

 “We were worried, for a while it looked like you weren't going to make it.” Kyle says as you break away from the hug. 

“Pff, not when I have the best medic in the world looking after me.” He says winking at you and grabbing your hand. You squeeze it tight and force a smile at him. It feels unnatural, it feels wrong, everything about this feels wrong. 

“What happened?” He asks suddenly, his eyes creasing together, his face going dark. You’re holding your breath, it feels like everyone in the room is holding their breath. He holds your hand up. You still have the hospital tag on. Shit. Panic rises in you. You don’t know what to do. You open your mouth to speak but words don’t come out.

“She hit her head.” Kyle says. You let out a sigh of relief as his hand finds the small of your back. 

“They wanted to keep me in for observation.” You follow up hoping he can’t hear the shaking in your voice. You look up at John and Simon, the colour drained from their faces. Simon clears his throat and Johnny turns to look at him. It gives you a second to squeeze your eyes shut and wish you were anywhere else. 

“You been pushing her too hard again?” Johnny asks Simon tutting. 

“Only what she can handle.” Simon says, it sounds cold in your ears. You feel sick bile rises in your stomach. You need to leave, your hand is sweaty, you pull it away from Johnny. You’re glad Kyle’s hand is on your back because without it you think you might pass out. 

“I have to go. Got this new rota that's kicking my ass.” You say trying to keep your voice level. It sounds so unnatural. You swallow trying to get the lump forming in your throat to go away but it wont. “I’ll come see you later. I promise.” You back up from the bed as Johnny looks confused. 

You can’t be here. You almost want to sprint out the room but you keep your calm walking out normally. When you leave and close the door behind you, that's when you run. 

______

You’re standing outside the washroom with a towel and a toothbrush in your hand. You want to take a shower scrub the layer of grease that's formed on your skin. You tried, you tried to take a shower in the hospital, the water brings flashbacks. Great, now you’re afraid of water. 

You have to get it together, if you can’t you’ll be sent home on leave, or worse discharged. You want to work, you enjoy work. Maybe not the people you work with but you’ve already thought about a transfer. You doubt John will have any issues with that, and if he does well there are always people above him. 

“Hey.” Kyle calls making you jump. He frowns coming towards you. “Didn’t see you at dinner, is everything okay?” It looks like he already regrets that question, no nothing is okay. Everything sucks and all you want to do is take a shower. 

“I want a shower.” You say looking back at the door. 

“Is someone in there? I can kick them out.” he offers, you sigh, shaking your head. He seems to get it and you hear him sigh. He steps up next to you putting his hand on your back. 

“I can help,” he says. You shake your head forcing yourself to be strong as your lip quivers. You have to try and do this alone. Your knuckles turn white as you grip your toothbrush as hard as you can. 

“I’ll watch the door, make sure no one comes in.” He says rubbing your back. You smile at him and nod, stepping into the room before you change your mind completely. 

The place smells damp as the automatic lights flicker on. It’s only been you and the rest of 141 using this space so their stuff is everywhere. You start to realise things about the room you didn’t even see before. It’s windowless, there’s a loud hum of vents. The place smells of aftershave and soap. 

You walk over to one of the showers, hanging your towel over the half wall. You’re stripping your clothes before you can stop yourself. This feels like a routine, showering in the freezing base showers only this time the thought of turning the showers on makes you feel sick.

You keep telling yourself you can do this, repeating the mantra in your head if only to keep your mind occupied. You’ve been taught how to deal with PTSD and triggers, what's the best way to help, or stave them away. You don’t have PTSD, you remind yourself. You’re just going through a rough patch.

As soon as you can get away from 141 and have a good night's sleep you’ll feel better. And now Johnny’s awake, that's one less thing to worry about. You reach over and twist the hot tap on. The water hits your arm and you pull it back like you’ve just been burned. 

You can do this. It’s just a shower. Kyle’s watching the door. No one can hurt you. 

You suck in a deep breath and stick your leg in, the water is surprisingly hot for once. That’s good, it will make things easier. One step at a time. Your hand and arm go in next, your breathing picks up, goosebumps rise on the parts of your body still exposed to the air. Now you’re shaking. 

You let out a long breath forcing yourself to move into the water. You turn letting it run down your back in an attempt to get the shaking to stop. It doesn’t work. Now you’re frozen you can’t move. You try to focus on getting your breathing to steady but it’s not working. You have nothing to distract yourself with. 

You force your eyes closed, that just makes things worse. Fear rises in you, you don’t know why but your head tips back. As soon as the water hits your face it’s like you don’t know where you are anymore. You’re not in the showers, you're back in the room. The water drowns out any sound in your ears. You don’t know what’s happening anymore.

The next thing you know you’re on the floor, your head throbs. There’s commotion, a noise you don’t recognise and footsteps. You open your eyes with a sob as tears escape. You turn, you must have slipped, Kyle is turning the shower off. He picks up your towel and comes over to you, bending down and wrapping it around you. He doesn’t say anything, just kneels down on the wet floor pulling you into his arms. 

You sob in his arms as he holds you tight. You get it all out, all the tears you’ve been avoiding over the last 24 hours. Maybe this is what you needed: a good cry. 

Kyle doesn’t let you go. Eventually he starts rocking you, stroking your hair, kissing the top of your head. He tells you everything will be okay. You want to believe him, you so badly want to leave this room and everything will be magically better. 

It won’t be though, and it won’t be for a very long time. 

As you calm down and your body stops shaking, anger burns in you. This should never have happened to you. Especially not by the people you love. You hate them, you never want to see them again. Kyle notices your change in body language and silently helps you to your feet. 

He walks you across to your room, closing the door behind him. 

“Want me to stay?” he asks as he helps you over to your bed. You nod looking up at him, he strokes your cheek smiling. “I’ll be back in a second.” He says going to leave the room. 

You don’t want to be alone, not right now. Maybe with Kyle here you can get some sleep. Or maybe it will be worse, right now you’ll try anything. You look over at Simon's lighter still sitting on the crate. You pick it up, turning it over in your hand before dropping it in the trash.

You never want to see them again.

next

I could have kept going. I don't know when to stop... This is what happens when my main fic is on hold. I need a million projects or I get bored XD Banners by firefly-graphics

[cyripticchronicler]

Healing

Pairing: Azriel x Reader

Summary: You had spent years in pain and agony, wanting nothing more than to go home to your mate. But now that you are home, you're unsure if he still loves you.

TW: Torture, wanting to die, potential SA, depression, crying, short mention of needles and blood.

A/N: This isn't my best work ngl but I was malaptive daydreaming about it this morning and figured I should make it into a fic! It's also my first Azriel/ACOTAR fanfic which is crazy! I love this dude and I'm definitely going to write about him more <3 It's a short fic but I hope you still like it!!

Masterlist

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻ੈ✩‧₊˚ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻ੈ✩‧₊˚

Ten years. You’d been gone ten years. 

Ten years of excruciating torture. Of being poked by needles. Touched by strangers. 

You’d always loved humans. You found them fascinating and tried to learn as much about them. But they wanted to know about fae as much as you did humans. 

You were sent on a task by Rhysand. It was simple; go to the human lands and see if it’s possible to form an alliance with them in the future. Everything was going smoothly until you were taken by an older man who spent his life researching fae and was determined to find the answers to his curiosity. He was a cruel, evil man. He took away your life. Your freedom.

You used to be happy. A blaze of sunshine that not even the biggest clouds could cover. And you had many reasons to be that way, the mating bond between you and Azriel had snapped; not yet accepted but you had planned to do it soon. You had a place in the IC. You worked hard for your court and created a home for yourself in Velaris. 

If you had known how quickly everything could be taken from you, you would have worked harder to protect it. 

You had almost given up, almost begged the man who hurt you to finish you off. To kill you. But the Gods weren't finished with you, and, no matter how much you wanted to die, you were found before you could. You were thankful, of course, but, despite being home with your loved ones once again, it doesn’t remove the long-lasting memories of agony and longing. 

Azriel hadn’t stopped looking for you ever since you went missing. While you spent ten years being tortured, he spent those years in his own sick form of torment. Each night he was plagued with dreams of you and each day he was troubled with worries of how you were doing and where you were. It was a never-ending cycle of you. 

When he found you, bound in chains with blood running down your cheek, he swears his heart stopped. You were back in his arms, wrapped around you so gently like you were made of glass. You’d melted into his warm body, tears freely falling down your scarred cheeks as you quietly sobbed. 

That was the only time you allowed yourself to cry in front of him. In front of anyone, for that matter. You didn’t want to worry anyone with your problems. They’d already spent years worrying about you, they shouldn’t have to anymore. So you jumped straight into your old self. You were talkative, made friends with Feyre and the other Archerchon sisters, and smiled and laughed when expected to. 

Despite your happy facade, Azriel hasn’t done more than hug you. He’s slept in the guest bedroom in The House of Wind while you’ve stolen his bed, his silk sheets nice and familiar. You’re unsure how to approach him. Does he still want to be with you? You’ve seen how he looks at Elain, eyes soft and caring. 

Ten years is a long time. And you’re worried that during that long time, he’s moved on. Maybe that's why you’re trying to act like yourself again. If he sees that you’re the same as you were before when he loved you, he’d love you again.

Your last straw was a month after you came home. All the tears you’d been holding back, and the emotions you’ve ignored overflowing one random night. You were lounging in the living room with Elain, Nesta and Feyre. You were nestled in an armchair, arms wrapped around your knees that are pressed up against your chest. 

You’ve already zoned out of the conversation, eyes glazing over as you stare at your frail hands, still so thin and shaky, like you never left that place. You only tune back into the conversation when a certain someone mutters your mate's name. “Azriel is a really good kisser. I bet he’s better than Rhys and Cassians,” Elain states casually, as though this was a normal thing to be talking about. Feyre and Nesta immediately jump in and defend their mate's skills but you’re already standing. 

Tears blur your vision, unable to be stopped with your usual pinch on your arm. Your fears had come true; Azriel, your mate, your love, had moved on. “Honey?” Your walk to the door abruptly stops, your lip pulled between your teeth and your eyes downcast. “Hey,” You’re embarrassed by the way your voice cracks. 

Azriels scarred hand tentatively reaches up to grip your shoulder, his other hand gently gripping your chin. He tilts your face, forcing your eyes to meet his own, warm caramel making your heart melt. “What’s wrong?” You shake your head moving away and wiping the tears from your face. “Nothing. I’m going for a walk.” He doesn’t respond and you take it as your sign to leave, hands eagerly reaching for the door handle as you escape into the chill night. 

Azriels footsteps were silent, a habit from being the court’s spymaster for centuries. His silence was why you didn’t notice him, loud sobs breaking free since you figured you were alone. By the time he makes himself known, your loud sobs have quieted to quickly falling tears and you’ve found yourself a bench to sit on and think. 

You let out a squeak when he sits beside you, jumping up from your sitting position. You whip your head around, letting out a sigh when you notice the familiar face. “You can’t just sneak up on me,” You mutter, cheeks flushing in embarrassment as you sit again. 

“I’m sorry,” He whispers genuinely, eager eyes tracking your every movement. “We need to talk.” You sigh, slumping against the bench as your heart beats faster. “Do we have to?” You’d rather live in oblivion than hear what he has to say. He’s going to tell you he’s in love with Elain and that he can’t be with you. Then you’re going to have no one and you’ll end up alone and sad forever-

“-I’ve been trying to give you space. To let you process what happened. But I don’t think you are processing things, honey.” He sighs, hand reaching up to rub at the back of your neck. “I want to be there for you. I’m your mate and I love you. Let me in.” His eyes are pleading, begging. 

Your breathing turns ragged, heart pounding in your chest. “Don’t-” You shake your head, turning away from his face. “Don’t lie to me.” You shrug his hand off your shoulders and scoot further down the bench but he doesn’t let you go far, hands holding your face as he leans into you, desperate. “I’m not lying to you, baby. Why do you think I’m lying to you?”

“B-because Elain-” You can’t finish your sentence, breaking into desperate sobs before his eyes. His eyes are knowing, laced with guilt as he pulls you into his chest. “I was planning to talk to you about this when you were feeling a bit better.” He ensures your eyes are staring into his when he speaks. “Elain and I kissed once. A year ago. I was- Gods I was so lonely without you and I was drunk and she was there. I swear when I squinted she looked like you. But as soon as I kissed her I regretted it immediately.”

He’s desperate for you to understand, voice pleading as he as he grips your face tighter. Tighter but never hurtful. “You are it for me, baby. I don’t want anybody else. I’d rather spend hundreds of years alone than be with someone else.”

“I’m sorry,” You whisper, hanging your head in shame. He’s quick to calm your worries with another hug. “Don’t be sorry. I should have talked to you about it sooner.” You shake your head, wrapping your arms around his neck and hiding your face. “I am sorry, though. I should have talked to you sooner. I just-” You’re sick of the way your voice thickens with tears. You’re sick of crying.

“I’m so tired.” You break, pulling him tighter against you. He hugs you just as tight, not wanting to let you go. “I want to be myself again. I want to be happy again but I’ve changed, and I’m scared you’re not going to like who I become.” You spill all your deepest worries, holding onto the lightness in your chest that you’re afraid won’t last long.

His breath fans your ear, a warmth that makes you shiver. “I’ve never expected you to stay the same. Even before you were taken. You’re changing but I’m changing too. That’s okay. You’re okay.” You pull away with a shaking sigh, hands moving to wipe your tears but Azriel pulls them into his own. 

His soft lips kiss your forehead, evoking another shaking breath. His lips then travel to your cheek, hot breath fanning against your flushed skin. As he places a kiss on your other cheek you can’t help the soft smile that lights up your face. Excruciatingly slowly, his lips graze down your cheek and to your jaw, light kisses making your skin heat.

He pulls away ever so slightly, breath fanning across your lips. He stays still, eyes eager as he waits for your response. He doesn’t have to wait long, your hands moving up to fist his hair. You quite practically yank him to you, lips greedily searching for his.

The kiss is warm and gentle and perfect. Love pours through him with each touch of your lip and swipe of his tongue against yours. You haven’t felt this loved in so long. So cared for. You keep him close, each touch mending the frail cracks in your heart.

“I love you,” you whisper, smiling your first genuine smile in years. “I love you, too. I always will.” Butterflies fluttering in your stomach, a sense of comfort washes over you. 

You know you’re not okay. But for now, you feel like you are. And that one moment, spent cuddled up to Azriel while the stars glisten down on you, gives you faith that you’ll be okay one day. As long as you have Azriel on your side.

[timmydraker]

On a seemingly random Tuesday night, a few members of the Bat Family are free to spend dinner at the manner.

Jason was benched by his fellow Outlaws for a nasty hit to his chest and got tired of Biz’s worrying even if it was appreciated at first.

Dick had been taking a small break after a particularly bad case with work that involved some hurt children and wanted to be back home.

Damian had only ever made threats to move about but the newley eighteen year old was still at home.

Tim had been using his free time while Kon and Cassie visited their families to visit his own while Bart and Barry dragged Wally on a bonding trip. The poor West boy had to miss out a concert of some sort.

Stephanie, Duke and Cass were all busy with a case and had pleaded with Bruce to take some time off because he was, quote, “Broodier than Hamlet”. He eventually relented when Barbie and Kate promised to keep an eye on them.

The group had decided to watch a movie instead of playing games, mainly because not games were banned, and settled on something that Tim paid no mind to.

The problem came that it was cold out and everyone insisted on having the fire as hot as it could go, but Tim naturally ran hot. Jason and Damian tended to get the coldest and while only Jason would complain, Damian could and would set anything he wanted on fire to get warm.

So, Tim didn’t complain and just said he was going to get changed.

He spent at least half an hour on one of the arm chairs by himself with his tablet playing RuneScape, when Dick inhaled so quickly everyone heard it.

Tim assumed it was something to do with the movie and didn’t turn, tapping away at his screen, completely ignorant to Dick’s quickly forming tears.

It was when Bruce also made a noise, this time a poorly pronounced ‘oh’ that he turned around, assuming it had to be a truely grand thing for Bruce to react so openly in the movie.

Instead he finds his foster father and brothers staring at him.

More specifically, his thighs.

Tim hadn’t realised his shorts would ride up and stop covering him to just above his knee and show the hundreds of scars littered over the outside and inside of his pale skin. They were mostly faded, but with the width of some of them they were always going to be visible, especially with the sheer amount.

Pulling his pant leg down, Tim doesn’t bother to hide a sympathetic wince and says, “Sorry, didn’t meant to show them. Sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”

He looks away again, assuming that was that and trying to remind himself that it wasn’t his fault that people were upset by his scars, just like Black Canary told him.

Instead he hears a sob and turns back to find Bruce holding Dicks hand as his oldest brother sobs into his hand. He sees that Jason is seemingly fighting to not match him even with his wide eyes and Damian is staring at him with confusion.

Realisation finds Tim quickly, which makes sense considering he’s supposed to be the ‘smart Robin’.

“You didn’t know…”

Dick stands up, dropping Bruce’s hand and comes to kneel before Tim, holding onto his own hands like some kind of follower to a god, “Why? I- I don’t- why?”

The desperation in his voice makes Tim feel sick, and he looks around at the others for help because surely he had talked to at least one of them about it? He had been open with his friends, and he hadn’t exactly kept it a secret, but he did avoid showing them…

Tim moves to hold onto Dick in return, “I’m sorry, I thought you guys knew-… okay, look, I’ve got a two year clean streak and I’m in therapy, okay? I’m so sorry Dick, I just assumed you knew cause I use the shower in the cave with you guys and… I’m so sorry.”

There’s a silence for a moment as Dick drags him into his arms and squeezes him as tightly as he can, not even being careful like he usually would.

“I don’t understand.”

Damian’s voice sounds uncharacteristic in how small it is. He’s staring at Tim’s legs like he might be able to catch a glimpse of the scars in genuine confusion.

Bruce seemingly can’t speak and so Jason tries his best to explain to the youngest Wayne boy, “Look, bra-kid, some times when people aren’t doing to well they… they hurt themselves. Tim…”

Giving his brother a smile, Tim takes over as tears finally break away from Jason. Jason was always the most emotional and that’s evident in how he actually lets Bruce pull him into a side hug.

“Dami, you know how my parents kind of sucked?”

Damian makes a scoff noise, “I know they were incompetent, yes.”

Smiling, Tim continues as his eyes grow wet with the sound of his families cries, “Well, I really wanted to good for them but they had impossible standards. When I found I couldn’t reach them, I decided I needed punishment. So…” he takes a deep inhale and moves a hand to Dick’s head to comfort him as he finishes. “I started to cut myself.”

Damian doesn’t get wide eyes or anything, and Tim thinks it’s so much worse that there’s an image understanding in his little brothers eyes that show he sees that as completely logical.

But it is quickly overcome, his first thought always what he was raised with and quickly followed by the ideals he’s learnt and now values. He doesn’t cry either, but he does have a look of a pure heart break in his sweet little eyes.

Bruce finally comes over and pulls his two sons into a hug, adjusting to fit Jason in and saying nothing as Damian comes up behind Tim and leans his head against the others back.

Bruce asks other a few minutes of holding each other, “You said you haven’t for two years?”

Tim smiles once again and presses a kiss to his dad’s cheek. “Yeah. I learnt that family, real family like ours, would never want physical punishment, especially for something we can’t control. That’s not how loving people work.”

Damian moves to wrap his arms around Tim in their first ever hug and by all gods and mighty beings is Tim glad he stuck around.

Hugs from his family was well worth it.

[baigepueckers]

Nika Mühl X Reader

Birthday Wishes

It starts the night before her birthday.

She’s curled up against you in bed, cheek pressed to your shoulder, her breathing soft and even. The apartment is quiet…just the occasional car outside and the distant hum of the fridge. She’s fast asleep, her body heavy with the kind of exhaustion that only comes after hours of rehab and pushing herself too hard, like she always does. You run your fingers gently through her hair, careful not to wake her, even as your own heart beats a little faster.

Because tomorrow is her birthday. And you’ve been planning this for weeks.

You glance over at the small pile of decorations hidden in the hallway closet, the wrapped gift tucked beneath the bed, and the note you spent too long rewriting until the words finally sounded like your heart. You’ve been together for years…long enough to know she doesn’t care about flashy things, but still, you want to make her feel loved. Known. Celebrated.

But this year, you’re giving her more than handwritten notes or her favorite breakfast.

You’re giving her home….in the form of the one person she misses most, Hana.

The next morning starts slow.

You wake her up with soft kisses and sleepy smiles, whispering a gentle, “Happy birthday, ljubavi,” as she burrows into your side and hums. There’s no rush. Just warmth.

You bring her breakfast in bed..heart shaped pancakes and coffee the way she likes it. You both sit cross legged in bed, eating and laughing over dumb TikToks, and for a while, it’s perfect. Simple. Quiet.

But your heart’s racing because the real surprise is only a few hours away.

You suggest getting out for a bit…”a drive,” you say vaguely. “Something cute. Just trust me.”

Nika narrows her eyes in mock suspicion. “You’re being weird.”

“I’m always weird.”

She snorts. “Okay, extra weird.”

You just smile, grab her hand, and tell her to get dressed.

She doesn’t realize where you’re going until you’re almost there.

Her brow furrows as your car turns into the short term lot of the airport.

“Wait… why are we at the airport?” she asks, sitting up straighter in her seat. “Are we flying somewhere? Y/N…what’s going on?”

You try to keep a straight face. “Maybe I just wanted to go plane watching.”

“Plane watching?”

You shrug. “Birthday vibes?”

She stares at you. “You’re so bad at lying.”

You grin and grab her hand. “Come on. Just trust me.”

You guide her through the terminal, her pace slowing the closer you get to the arrival gate. She keeps glancing at you, confused, trying to piece things together. You give nothing away. Your fingers squeeze hers gently as you stop just outside the gate.

“Okay,” she says slowly. “What are we doing here?”

And then she hears it… her name, in a voice that makes her entire body go still.

“Nika!”

She whirls around.

There, walking toward her with a suitcase in one hand and a crooked smile on her face, is Hana.

Time stops.

Nika doesn’t move for a second, like her brain needs time to catch up with her heart. Her breath catches, eyes wide and glistening. And then she runs.

You step aside just in time as she crashes into her sister, arms wrapping around her so tightly you’re amazed they don’t both fall over. It’s all tangled limbs and half laughed sobs, her fingers fisting the back of Hana’s sweatshirt like if she lets go, she’ll vanish again.

You stand back and watch, tears welling in your own eyes.

Eventually, Nika turns to you, cheeks streaked, smile trembling.

“You… you did this?”

You nod, blinking back tears. “Happy birthday, baby.”

Her lip wobbles and she steps forward, cupping your face in her hands like she has no idea how to thank you and no words to even try. So she doesn’t. She just kisses you, long and soft, in the middle of the airport like it’s only the two of you.

When she pulls back, she presses her forehead to yours.

“This is the best gift anyone’s ever given me.”

You whisper, “You missed her. I saw it. And if I can make your heart feel full again..even for a weekend… I’ll do it a thousand times.”

She exhales shakily, eyes flicking between you and Hana.

“I love you,” she says. “So much.”

“I know,” you smile. “Now let’s get your sister home.”

That night, with takeout containers scattered on the kitchen counter and laughter echoing from the living room as Hana shows you embarrassing childhood photos of Nika, you feel it settle in your chest…this glowing, steady kind of love. The kind that doesn’t need fireworks or fancy dinners. Just three hearts beating under one roof.

Later, when Hana’s gone to bed and you’re curled up with Nika on the couch, she kisses your temple and whispers, “You made me feel everything I didn’t even know I was missing.”

You lace your fingers through hers, smile against her skin, and whisper, “Happy birthday, my Nika.”

And she holds you like she never wants to let go.

Because this? This is everything.

[sheaabuttaababyy]

Regret - JU and RR

Jey x Faith x Roman

Warning: Lots of Angst, masturbation, slight fluff

Sobs left Faith body as Josh sat across from her, silent. Guilt written all over his face. She wiped her tears, but it was no use. Fresh ones streaming down her face as she looked at the man sitting in front of her.

"Why? I don’t understand. I’ve been there for you for everything your ups and down. Whenever you needed me I was there. Now your leaving me for her? The one who broke your heart that I healed?" Another sob leaving Faith’s mouth at the end of her sentence.

Josh winced at her words, not knowing what to say. "I-im sorry, I didn’t mean any of this to happen." He gripped his mullet feeling stressed.

Faith scoffed standing up, anger building up inside her. "The fuck you mean you didn’t mean for this to happpen? You been fucking your ex for months while we’re engaged and got her fucking pregnant. And now here you are telling me you are leaving me to go build a family with her!!!"

"Faye, I know your mad and you every right to be, but I have to be there for my kid. I know it hurts but Emma is different now, she isn’t the same girl who used to break my heart and use me for my money. She loves me.

"I LOVE YOU, IVE ALWAYS LOVED YOU THROUGH EVERYTHING. I never cared if you had money or if you were broke I Loved you Josh, and this is how you repay me!?"

"I’m sorr-"

"It’s always I’m sorry, oh I’m so sorry for hurting you, fuck you piece of shit. Your nothing you fucking cunt. You and that walking std deserve each other. I hope she gives you a fucking disease from how many niggas she fucks daily" Josh blinked not believing what he was hearing. This wasn’t the sweet faith he knew.

"Just get the fuck out my house and give me my fathers ring back" Eyes going to his left hand, where the ring sat on his ring finger. Slowly twisting the black band off, he held it in his palm, it quickly getting snatched out his hand.

"Take this mothafucka too, give it to that bitch" Taking her engagement ring off throwing it directly at the forehead at her now Ex-fiancé, bouncing off and falling in his lap. He picked it up holding it in her direction. "You can keep this, it’s still yours"

"I don’t want it. I don’t want anything you gave me or anything that has a trace of you. I want you burned out my Brain, no reminder of you" Josh stared at her in disbelief, his chest starting to feel heavy.

"The fuck you just sitting there looking stupid for? Get. The. Fuck. Out" finally standing up, he got up going towards the front door before leaving, his eyes now burning.

3 months. 3 months since that night and Josh’s life has been, hell.

Currently he was sitting in his living room, staring at nothing in particular. "Joshyyy pooh" Emma’s loud annoying voice, was heard making him roll his eyes. "What?" He knew he responded harshly but he didn’t care, she’s been on his nerves.

"I need some money" of course, money. It was always money with her. "I already gave you so much already. Where did all that go?"

"I spent it all on shopping" she spoke like it was nothing. "You shopped for the baby too right? Cause that’s what most of the money was for"

"Why would I use the money you gave me for the baby?" Josh looked at her as if she was dumb. Which she was.

"Emma don’t piss me off right now. You literally said that’s why you needed it"

"Oh I spent that on a Birkin bag" she giggled, pissing him off even more. "Pleaseeeee" she got on her knees pulling on his shorts. His face was straight, not reacting at all. Once she got his pants and boxers down, she took ahold of his soft dick.

Five minutes of trying to get it up, but it was still on soft. "What is wrong with you? It’s been three months and your dick still can’t get hard" Josh just shrugged not even bothering to look at her as he grabbed his phone. It’s been like this for months now, everytime he tries to do anything sexual with Emma, his dick could never get hard anymore.

She huffed scrabbling up to get back on her feet. "Can I just get some money now? I tried at least." Josh shook his head, eyes still on his phone. "No" Emma let out a frustrated scream, stomping to the front door, leaving the house.

"Finally" Joshua whispered relieved that the cause of his headache was gone, as he logged onto his fake account on instagram. Immediately he went to Faiths page scrolling through her pictures.

As he continued to scroll, his dick jumped seeing her pretty face and body. "Fuckk" he clicked on her bikini picture, grabbing his dick that was now standing hard and tall.

He spat on his hand, bringing it back to his lower half, stroking himself. "Fuck, Faith. Why you gotta be so sexy" he groaned tossing his head back, imagining it was her he was fucking. Remembering how her sweet moans were, how her ass would ripple each time he fucked her from the back, how good her pussy tasted on his tongue. His eyes shot open feeling his nut coming, his eyes fixated on his phone, looking at the picture of her.

"Aghhh fuck" he shouted his hand moving faster. His body stilled, stomach flexing as ropes of cum shot out his tip. "Fuckk faithhh" he whimpered, coming down from his high. He sighed, looking up at the ceiling. What the fuck has his life come to?

Looking back at his phone he was about to exit out but noticed her new picture. The fuck? He clicked up the picture of her sitting on pink flower petals.

Faithmonae ✔️

Liked by Trinity fatu, Roman Reigns, Kehlani and others

FaithMonae✔️ My man really went all out for me🥹❤️

KennedyRyan New man!?!?

WWE_gossip Tea for meeee

Natnatpat Aww period get spoiled sis

Tinamonae Being treated the way you should. I know that’s right

Josh’s head flooded with a million questions, new man?? Who the fuck is this? Who did this for her? Has she really moved on from him that quickly? Getting up he went to the washroom to clean himself as he called his twin.

"Yoooo, what’s up?" Jon’s voice came through, but Josh had no time for funny talk. "Who the fuck is Faith’s man?" Jon went silent on the other end, irritating Josh further. "Stop playing with me Jon, who is he? I know her an Trinity still talk and she tells you everything."

"I don’t know man" the older twin replied. "Stop fucking lying to me!"

"you better watch your tone, before I do sum you won’t like. Plus I’m being for real i don’t know, she won’t even tell Trin who it is."

He rubbed a hand down his face feeling overwhelmed. This was all too much to take in. Josh knew he fucked up. Putting her through everything, leaving her for his Ex who did him wrong and is doing it again. He fucked up.

But he never expected her to move on. Especially this quick. "Tell Trinity to ask. Ima find out which fucker tryna take her from me."

"Bruh leave her alone. You already put her through so much shit, she’s finally moving on. Finally happy don’t ruin that for her."

Closing his eyes he listened to his brothers words. He should leave her alone, but he can’t. He wants her back. "You know I can’t do that Uce. I need her. All of this made me realize how much I need her, she’s my other half. I’m miserable without her."

"Well who’s fault is that?" Josh put his head down in shame. "Mine"

"Exactly. You need to focus on the child you put in that whore. If it even is yours."

"It is mine!" Josh shouted feeling anger. "I know how Emma is I get that. Her ass wouldn’t go that far and lie though, I know that for a fact."

"Right… anyways I gotta go lil bruh, talk to ya later"

Josh found himself driving to his twins house, as he got there he saw his cousin Joe and little brother Joseph already there a hanging out in the family room.

4 tequila shots in and he found himself spilling out everything he was feeling to them. "I took care of her, let that bitch stay in my house. Gave her everything she wanted, just for the baby to be someone else’s." He darkly chuckled taking another shot. The burning in his throat, feeling too good to him at the moment.

"5 months ago I thought I was gonna be a dad, I was ready to see my baby girl. And s-she" he swallowed back the sob that was built in his throat, washing it away with more alcohol. Remembering the day he was in the delivery room with Emma as she gave birth, the baby coming out looking nothing like him at all. And even freshly out you could tell, even the doctors and nurses knew it. And the way Emma cried as Josh questioned it. He knew for a fact it wasn’t his child.

"She lied to me. Used me. Again. I left the best thing that ever happened to me, to raise a child with her that wasn’t even mine" he gripped the tequila bottle not even bothering to pour it in the cup anymore.

"I mean you put yourself in this position. You made the decision to go back to her and fuck her. Even if she didn’t lie about this whole baby thing, you still fucked up, and ruined everything with Faith" Joe’s voice rang out, making everyone in the room look towards him.

Josh snarled, listening to his words. "I know man"

"Do you? Cause you treated Faith like shit. Fucking around with that dumb bitch Emma. She literally cheated on you multiple times when you were together." Joe let out a laugh before continuing. "You were so lucky to have Faith, she’s a woman every man wanted. Beautiful, smart, loyal, caring. She helped you at your lowest times, she’s the reason why you were doing so good in your career. Now look at you. A fucking bum, with a fucked up life." Joe stood up feeling slightly angry, still not believing how dirty his cousin did her.

"I told yo ass if you don’t treat her right, don’t get mad when someone else does. And look at you now, your mad cause now someone is treating her how she deserves and it isn’t you that’s doing it." Josh stood up, his cousins words triggering him. He knew he was right.

"MAN SHUT THE FUCK UP" Jon and Joseph quickly rushed between the two as they sized eachother up, looking ready to fight one another. "Chill chill" Jon pushed his twin slightly back. "Nah he got me fucked up" Josh threw the bottle at the wall causing it to shatter.

Joe stepped back, grabbing his keys off the glass table. He walked pass his cousins stopping at Josh. "Your pathetic" he smiled in his face before, going to leave out the house. Door slamming shut leaving the three brothers in silence.

2 months since the big fight with Joe. The two didn’t talk at all. Josh’s been busy, trying to focus on wrestling, it not going so well. He’s been lacking, he knew it and the world noticed too. He’s been trying to get in contact with Faith sending her messages, emails, calls from different numbers, but she hasn’t responded to a single one.

Josh pulled into a 90s themed diner, one that he and Faith used to go to all the time, when they were together. Getting out the car, he walked towards the diner before stopping In his tracks. The sight in front of him breaking his heart. Watching through the window he saw Faith and Joe laughing flush against eachother in a booth, feeding each other, small kisses between each bite, happy smiles planted on their faces.

His eyes burned with tears seeing them together. feeling betrayed and hurt. He watched Faith get up from the booth placing a loving, kiss on Joe’s lips, as she turned around to walk away, he didn’t miss how he slapped her ass making her giggle.

Body on fire, shaking with anger, he took long strides, going inside the restaurant. He stopped towards his big cousin, who was drinking his coffee, legs spread apart one arm across the booth seat. A smirk planted on his face seeing his upset lil cousin. "Sup cuzzo"

"What the fuck are you doing with her here, why are you kissing, hugged up, dammit everything!"

Unfazed Joe took another sip before. "We’re together" he spoke casually.

"How could you do this to me? You know I still wanted her? Wait You the fucking guy who got her all those pink flowers?"

"Correct"

"You went after her three months me and her separated?" Josh slammed his hand on the table, causing it to shake.

"Actually. I went after her 2 days after y’all called it a quits"

"Ima kill yo ass." Josh said lowly gritting his teeth. His eyes drifting off to his cousins left hand, a Black band resting around, on his ring finger. The same one he wore around his, a time ago.

Joe smiled, looking into his cousins eyes. "Do it." Sending him another smile, his eyes landing behind Josh, a wider and genuine smile taking over his face.

"Babeee, my feet hurt I think I need a massag-" Josh felt his heart stop hearing that sweet, angelic voice again. 13 months it’s been, since he’s heard it.

Faiths voice faltered seeing her ex. "Oh, hi" she spoke awkwardly, her eyes darting between the two cousins. "Faith" he let out a loss of words seeing her in-front of him.

His eyes drifted downwards, landing on her stomach that was slightly swollen, her hand protectively over it, a big diamond, decorating it. Josh felt sick, like he was going to pass out. Not only was his big cousin, dating her. They were engaged and are having a baby together."

"No" he whispered. Joe quickly stood up, already knowing Josh was going to cause a scene. "Baby go to the car I’ll be right there" passing Faith the keys, he gently guided her to the exit.

"But-"

"Sweetheart. Please."

Her eyes went to Josh who looked like was going crazy as he mumbled to himself. "Okay, please be quick" nodding his head, placing a kiss on her lips, mumbling a quick "I love you" against them, before she left the building.

"You got her pregnant man" Josh pushed Joe’s chest, hyperventilating.

"Hey, hey! Look at me." Gripping the back of his neck her put his forehead against his. "You never deserved her, ever. You took her for granted, this would have never happened if you did your part as a man and Treated her right. You can’t be upset with me, and you Damn sure can’t be mad at her. You did this" Joe spoke harshly, before pushing Josh back, his ass landing on the booth chair.

"I love you little cousin, but I love her more. Me and Faith are going to have our little boys in 3 months so please, for the love of god. Let us be happy, let her be happy. That’s the least you could do" pulling 3 hundred dollar bills, he placed it on the table as a tip, before, leaving.

Josh put his head down on the table, a cry leaving his body.

"Sweetheart, I thought I told you to go into the car" Joe said walking towards Faith who stood outside the entrance of the diner. "I know, I know. I was just worried about you" he took her hand placing a kiss on the back of it.

"Don’t worry about me, you know I can beat anyones ass" his playful tone, making her laugh. Reaching the car he opened the passenger door , helping her get in. Rubbing her stomach, he bent down placing a kiss on it, doing the same to her lips, before rounding the car to get in the driver seat.

Inside the diner, Josh watched with a heavy heart. Seeing Joe and faith together, sharing looks of love just like they used to. Tears fell down his face as he saw their car drive away, leaving him feeling broken and alone. A big reminder of what he had lost.

Author note: Well damn.

🏷 @charmed-dreamssss @usoinked @mselenalovebug @theusotwinzcom @bloodlineslut @trippinsorrows @catxo @whowrotethenote @uceyliyahh @adoreesun @christinabae @mjonthetrack

[tinylilacbun]

hii first i wanna say i love love love your writings and could read them for days!! im wondering if you could write a fic where rafe upsets toddler!reader so she turns to ward or rose for comfort, please?

You giggle as you toddle your way to Rafe's room, holding two drawings in your hand that you just can't wait to show him, you spent all morning to make them perfect.

As you reach his bedroom door you can hear his muffled voice through it and strain your arm for the handle, almost stumbling when it opens.

Rafe is pacing in front of his bed, phone held up to his ear and nibbling on the nail of his thumb. "I swear, I'll get you your money, you just-"

Not realizing that he's stressed you rush over to him, tugging on his shirt. "Rafey! Rafey, look!"

"I- hold on..." He sighs into the phone, holding it away from his ear for a moment. "Not now, kid."

You pout, determined to show him what you made for him, not taking no as an answer and hold the drawings up. "But look! I mades this!"

He ignores you, continuing his conversation with the person on the other line.

The frown on your face grows and you whine, stomping your foot on the ground you tug once more on his shirt, wanting your brother's attention. "Rafey-"

Suddenly he grabs your wrist and detangles your hand from the fabric. "I said not now!" He snaps at you, glaring at you momentarily until his eyes widen in realization at what he just did, his mouth opening and closing again.

Without thinking twice he ends the call, letting go of you he crouches down to console you but before he could say anything you dash out of his room again with tears tears welling up in your eyes.

Rafe curses at himself, he promised that he would never let his frustrations out on you, doesn't matter in what situation, you're his baby sister and the only person in this house to love him unconditionally and to see him as a role model.

After quickly gathering his thoughts he goes after you. As he goes down the stairs he stops in his tracks when he finds the two drawings you made specifically for him, picking them up his heart aches at the sight.

Descending the stairs he can hear your sobs coming from the living room, peering inside he sees you in his father's arms who's sitting on an arm chair and rubbing a hand up and down your back while shushing you.

Rafe's face falls at that, usually you go to him anytime you're upset but now he's the reason you are and is mad at himself for letting his temper get the better of him, again.

Since you were born he wanted and tried to do better, to make up for everything he did wrong in the past and taking you as his last chance to be a better person and he failed.

Ward locks eyes with him and Rafe gulps when he beckons him closer, not being able to read his expression.

As you hear his footsteps approach you open your eyes but turn your head away, not wanting to look at him right now and Rafe feels even worse than he already does.

He sits down on the sofa near you both, the drawings still held in his hands as he looks at them with a small yet sad smile he speaks up. "I'm- um...those drawings you made, they are really good."

You don't answer, still sniffling and fidgeting with one loose seam of your father's shirt.

Rafe sighs but continues talking, not giving up on getting on your good side again. "They're gonna look amazing next to all the others I have on my wall."

Finally you turn your head back to face him, still upset but giving him a glimpse of hope. "You keepin' 'em?"

"What, of course I am. I keep everything you make for me." He says honestly, glancing at you before back down at the paper sheets. "I think those are the best ones yet."

You lift your head a little and let Ward wipe away the remaining tears from your face, handing you over to Rafe when you reach your arms out for him.

The boy doesn't even hesitate to envelope you in his embrace, rocking you in his arms as you wrap your short arms around his neck.

Ward watches the scenes unfold before deciding to get up to leave you both alone, exiting the room with one last nod at Rafe.

When he's sure that his father is gone he kisses your head, whispering softly. "I'm sorry, for snapping at you...I really am."

You tighten your arms around him slightly. "Lub you Rafey."

He smiles at that, his hold on you not relenting. "I love you more, kid."

Taglist

For everything:

@my-river-lilly @pauntedblacknails @fanfictioniseverything @devilslilbabysblog @buckymydarlingangel @hallecarey1 @daybreakwinter @loveshineslikethesky @wandaslittlewhore @vase-of-lilies @white-wolf1940 @simpingbutch @mischiefsemimanaged @alina02 @teddybearsgrr @doozywoozy @angelbabydoll28 @glxwingrxse @lilymurphy03 @veryvaughnny @lokigirlszendaya @youngstarfishdinosaur @little--baby--bear @minideathgoddess @rach2602 @gh0stgurl @flourishandblotts-inc @lovelyy-moonlight @yoruse

@mythixmagic @iris-xoxo-juhu

For Rafe:

@chiaraanatra @chimindity @erikasurfer

[princessbrunette]

⊹ ᜊ(ᜊ ´ ˘)੭ ♡ … SLIM PICKINS ♡

track nine of the short n’sweet series. pairing: bountyhunter!rafe x reader. based loosely on the song slim pickins by sabrina carpenter. enjoy! ໒꒰՞ ܸ. .ܸ՞꒱ა

maybe you were just understimulated and bored. maybe you kind of liked when he got jealous.

you sit at his side on a bench outside the motel room for a while when you bring it up. he’s stiff, got you pinned to his side with an arm around you like someone forced him to do it. you figured he was trying to bond, show affection — but still had that little fear you’d just up and run off. the two of you stare out over the desert and a horse whinnies in the distance.

“y’know i had a boyfriend ‘fore you stole me.” you tell him quietly. you try not to sound accusatory, voice quiet enough to do so but his nose twitches to turn up anyway.

“you…what?”

“on the barn. where i lived.” you begin, treading carefully and he turns to glance at you, curious. “he lived in the farmhouse the other side of the land. my age. we knew eachother since we were little, used to play on the tire swing in my garden. only recently he became my boyfriend.” you reminisce and rafes spine tingles and his neck feels a little hotter at the way there’s still a tinge of sadness to your voice after all this time of travelling with him. nothing was ever enough for you.

however, he’s got nothing else to do and he’s curious.

“yeah? what’s this boyfriend of yours like then?” he drawls, clearly unimpressed but you seem unshaken. rafe had talked to you in crueller ways before.

“brown hair… brown eyes. he was really generous, would do anything for my family. sometimes he played it a little safe i mean, he waited so long to even ask to kiss me but… he was sweet. i miss when men were sweet.”

“i can be sweet. i’m so damn good to you.” rafe blurts out, and you nearly laugh because of how irritated he sounds in contrast.

“you kidnapped me.”

“ugh— right, ‘cus— ‘cus it’s always my fault right? you know my dad made me— whatever.” he steams off into a lecture and you relax at his side, unbothered. it almost bothered him more that you didn’t react to his explosiveness anymore, especially at a moment like this. you were still thinking of him.

he sighs, petulantly and sits back in his seat too, rubbing beneath his nose, legs spread casually as he thinks. you figure that would be that, and you knew not to poke the bear. surprisingly, after a minute — rafe speaks again.

“if you could… if you could go back n’be on that barn where i took you from… would you… would you be there, with him?” he gets bashful and snappy, enunciating with a flat hand extended. rafe always talked with his hands and you found it interesting.

truly, you don’t know. to pose such a complex question after all the time you’d spent together made that line appear between your brows. he doesn’t have to look at you to feel you shrug.

several hours later and he’s got your face in a pillow, ass in the air. no matter what kind of day the two of you had, what kind of conversations bestowed upon you — if rafe needed to get his dick wet, that was exactly what would happen. he’s basically in your guts, and you’re sobbing so loud as your walls spasm around him that you’re sure the motel would receive noise complaints.

a coarse hand slides up your spine and grips the back of your neck as he pounds you before he slots around to the front to hold your throat off the bed, bicep bulging at the position. he talks, and it takes you a second to digest it. you’re not used to conversation out of dirty talk.

“did he ever make you feel good like this? that— that boyfriend of yours?” he grits his teeth. you shake your head, mouth too occupied with forming an ‘o’ shape as he hits a new spot and he lightly smacks your cheek. just hard enough to regain your attention. “yeah you better use those words—”

“no! no— he didn’t.” you pant like a puppy, a string of drool still attached to the pillow from your lip.

“uh huh. yeah i fuckin’ bet.” he chases you up the bed a little when you arch away, too sensitive and holds you down, continuing to rough house your sore pussy. “might’ve been good to you but he wouldn’t fuck you like this huh? wouldn’t make you cum this god damn hard.”

you respond something, but by this point it’s muffled — head dropped into the pillow suffocating all sound. gripping the hair at the back of your head, he yanks your head up and licks his lips, determined to hear you. “nah, speak.”

“too— mmph—”

“yeah?”

“too nice! he was too nice!” you wail, walls fluttering and he huffs out a smirked chuckle, jaw clenching as he uses you like a sex toy.

“mm. that’s uh, that’s real fucked up baby. just needed a big mean man to get you right, huh?”

rafe was fucked up, but he wasn’t often wrong.

[magicalqueennightmare]

Nothing Will Change

(Again a Takeshi gif cause Rick ones are in short demand)

Rick Flag X Meta!Marine Reader

What starts off as a friends with benefits situation between you and Rick becomes so much more

Violence, cursing, sexual situations

"Insubordinate" "Overbearing" 

"You disobeyed a direct order!" "Yeah because it was a stupid fuckin order!"

You and Rick stood in the center of the plane, glaring at each other as you argued while the remaining members of the team watched in amusement. He crossed his arms over his chest and you purposely mimicked his posture, hearing Harley bite back a giggle. "I'm your superior officer and over this team!" "Well good for you! I'm the mother fucker that got us out of there and back on this damn plane!" "You took a stupid risk, corporal!" you bristled at him at pulling rank . "Fuck you Flag! What you call stupid I call worth it. It got done, didn't it?" 

Contrary to how it would seem to a bystander you and Rick were actually damn good friends off the clock. He was a fucking sweetheart under that tough exterior and you trusted him with your life. You really did work well together just sometimes you butted heads on missions and he wanted to treat you like he did the squad which meant he expected to bitch you out with little to no push back. You turned to head towards the back of the plane, planning to sit right near the drop doors so you'd be first off. "Easy marine" he muttered and you spun on your heel.

"You may outrank me Colonel but don't think for a minute I am your subordinate on this fucking team" you waved a hand around the plane where Blackguard, Harley, Mongal and about a half dozen other residents of Belle Reeve sat "They answer to me as much as they answer to you, most of them answer faster to me than to you" you covered the few steps between the two of you to be standing right in front of him, never mind that you had to look up to meet his eyes "I respect you Rick, I really do but sometimes you're simply a fuckin asshole"

A beat of silence fell before one by one the squad started hooping and hollering knowing Rick would never tac more time onto them for something so trivial despite the glare he shot their way as you raised an eyebrow and lifted your arms out "See Colonel? You may outrank me but it appears they prefer the corporal" 

"Fuck Rick" you gasped, clutching to his shoulders as his hips snapped up into yours, driving himself deeper inside of you with every roll of his hips. Your fingernails dug into his flesh, head dropping over onto his neck as light sobs of his name mixed with praises and curses fell from you.

Your thighs tightened around his waist, one hand moving to brace yourself on the headboard behind him as another orgasm slammed into you. He didn't slow down, didn't give you time to adjust before he was pulling you tight to him and turning the two of you so his weight was pining you to the mattress, he hiked your left leg up further around his waist to give him a new angle as his fingers found your clit, intent on wringing another orgasm out of your already spent form.

"I can't Rick. Fuck, I can't" you pratically sobbed. He slowed his thrusts slightly, hand stilling but fingers staying in place as he leaned down to catch your lips in a kiss that was so damn gentle compared to how hard he was fucking you it made your head spin. He licked into your mouth almost playfully then moved to kiss down your jaw and to your neck before biting the soft flesh there "You can't take anymore baby?" you shook your head weakly and he laughed "But where's my little smartmouthed marine?" "Rick please" you moaned when he rolled his hips deeper into yours. "Where is she, sweetheart? The one who couldn't listen to orders? The one who loves calling me an asshole?" 

When you didn't respond he slammed his hips roughly into yours, accentuating every word with a snap of his hips "Where's.that.marine?"  you felt your eyes roll back in your head as another orgasm started to build and Rick chuckled darkly "Well I'm be damned honey looks like you had another one in you after all" 

When his fingers curled against your clit again the orgasm slammed into you fully causing your legs to lock around his waist and your walls to squeeze down on his cock. "God damn darlin" he growled, forehead pressed to your chest as he chased his own release. You felt his lips connect to your skin, sucking dark marks on your flesh just below where your clothes would fall so no one would see. Your nails dug into his back as he moved up to kiss you "Feel so fuckin good baby. You've been so good for me" he praised and you felt your walls clench around him. His eyes fluttered shut, a smirk forming on his lips "You like that sweetheart? Like hearing you're my good girl?" 

You could feel his thrusts start to falter and knew he was so damn close. You hadn't even felt another orgasm building so it took you by surprise when his teeth grazed your earlobe right as you fell over that edge. "Fuck, squeezin the hell out of me baby" he growled before burying himself inside of you with one final thrust. You felt when he came, thick spurts of cum coating your walls and dripping out of your overworked cunt.

--------------------

The only sound that filled the room was both of you working to get your breathing back to normal and the light kisses he was leaving across whatever patch of your skin he could reach. "Guess you were a little more pissed at me than you said?" you teased, running your fingers through his sweaty hair and down his broad back, tracing scars and the marks from your nails. 

He lifted his head to look at you and you could see the worry in his eyes "Did I hurt you?" you shook your head "No Rick but tell me the truth" he kissed the base of your throat and you knew he felt you swallow hard at the action "You could've gotten yourself killed" "We're called the suicide squad. Kind of our thing, isn't it?" you joked and was rewarded with those hazel eyes full of fire glaring up at you "Very fuckin funny. Next time just listen to me. I hate arguing with you and pulling rank" "Especially when you lose?" you joked and he dipped his head down to bite down on your breast just hard enough you gasped. "Dammit Flag!" He gave you a broad grin "You behave and I'll behave" 

You shook your head "I promise that as long as your orders doesn't mean I have to stand on the sidelines and see a mission go sideways for no good reason besides I may get killed I'll listen to them" he dropped his head back down to your chest "You're fuckin killing me. Your legs feel like showering yet?" you nudged at his chest "If a big asshole would get off me" he lifted his head and gave you a smile that made your heart flip "You weren't complaining a few minutes ago about me being on top of you"

--------------------

This thing between you and Rick had started as a way to blow off steam. Neither of you had energy or time to date and definitely not to keep up pretenses of a relationship outside of work. He was someone you trusted to not hurt you plus the added benefit that you knew each other was clean of diseases and he couldn't get you pregnant from documented precautions you'd taken.

It was enjoyable, Rick was fucking amazing in bed. You'd never had anyone like him before who actually seemed to draw as much, if not more pleasure from giving than receiving. You spent most of your time together anyways so the friends with benefits idea was easy to wrap your head around after a conversation that set ground rules.

If either of you found someone you wanted to pursue it was over. If you stayed overnight whoever's house it wasn't slept on the couch. You didn't let it bleed into your work relationship or your friendship because you were too important to each other. You were honest with each other and most importantly and the one you were having a harder and harder time with looking in the eye was if you started to catch feelings you needed to tell the other person.

You couldn't tell Rick you were starting to feel more for him than the friend that you had mind blowing sex with for numerous reasons. Hell he didn't know the biggest secret you carried and you could only imagine the betrayal in those hazel eyes you loved so much when the day came that he found out. 

You'd hold your heart close at hand so when that day came the crush would maybe be a little cushioned or so you hoped. 

---------------------

You were half asleep when you heard your bedroom door creak open and rolled over to see Rick leaning against the doorframe with a grin "Mornin" "Mornin" you repeated with a smile. He held up a coffee mug in his hand so you held your arm out which caused him to laugh "So damn independent until she just woke up and she wants coffee" he walked over to the bed and waited until you'd pushed yourself up into a seated position to hand you the mug. You took a tentative sip and damn near moaned, Rick always made the best coffee. 

He raised an eyebrow before a smirk slipped onto his face "I haven't even touched you this morning but I'll take the compliment" you rolled your eyes and stared at him over the brim of the mug "If you're waking me up, Waller called you and will be calling me.." before you could finish the sentence your phone started chiming. You cut your eyes at Rick and he nodded, mimicking locking his lips before sitting down on the edge of the bed while you answered the call.

You answered the phone on the second ring "There's a briefing at ten. I already spoke to Colonel Flag. I expect both of you to be in attendance, Corporal, understood?" "Yes ma'am" You replied then the phone went dead in your hand. You rolled your eyes "She's always such a fuckin peach" 

Rick laughed and leaned over to place a gentle kiss right over your pulse "I gotta get going. I don't wanna roll in with the same clothes I left in. I'll see you there?" You nodded "See you there. Thanks for the coffee" "Anytime sweetheart. Anytime" he replied before standing up and walking out of your bedroom. 

You sat there and listened to his footsteps as he grabbed his jacket and slipped his boots on then walked out your door, smiling to yourself when you heard him lock the handle lock before shutting it behind himself.  You let out a deep breath then kicked your blanket off. Best not to keep Waller waiting. She was a bitch on a good day, let alone when she'd gotten impatient.

----------------------

When you pulled into your parking spot Rick stood with a shoulder leaned against his truck waiting on you to park your jeep. While the two of you made sure to never come into work together you always seemed to unconsciously wait on the other to actually walk into the building.

Once you'd shut your door and started walking towards him he pushed off his truck and took a step towards you "So, any idea on what we're walking into?" you asked and he shrugged "With Waller? You and me both know there's no telling" a laugh fell from your lips because there had never been a truer sentence spoken. 

You fell in step next to him as you headed towards the front entrance. Whatever it was, you could handle it, right?

---------------------

You and Rick shared an office, it made sense considering you were at ARGUS very little and what time you were there it was either reporting to Waller or doing paperwork. Of course it was a little crowded with two desks shoved into it but it was better than either of you having to share space with anyone else or having to have a desk out in the bullpen with Waller's office flunkies.

The two of you managed to make it into the office, sit down your belongings and sign into your computers before Waller's secretary Christina knocked on the door "Colonel Flag? Corporal Y/L/N? Miss Waller wants to see the two of you in her office" you opened the door and smiled at her "Christina, We've both told you to just call us Rick and Y/N. You don't have to use ranks or our last names" she smiled "Yes ma'am." before scurrying away

You glanced over your shoulder at Rick "How the hell is she working here again?" he shrugged "No clue on that one sweetheart?" you narrowed your eyes and his own widened "Sorry Y/N" you shook your head but laughed "You southern men" he held the door open with one hand so you could walk open, a smirk slipping onto his face when you barely had to duck "Let's go see if we're in trouble"

Waller's office was at the far end of the building, away from everyone else's. Normally the door would be closed along with the blinds being drawn but Christina must have told her she was successful in summoning the two of you because the door stood open and you could hear Waller's voice along with another woman's. Rick must have clocked the other voice as well because he glanced down at you with a questioning look. You shrugged but continued walking, letting him take the lead since that's what Waller would expect.

When Rick knocked at the open door her voice drifted out "Come in" you followed Rick into the door, clocking another woman standing with Waller. She was probably around your age, long honey brown hair that was done up in a pretty updo with light makeup and the bluest eyes you'd ever seen.

Her pantsuit looked freshly freshed and more than likely tailored to her. She smiled broadly when she saw the two of you, even when you both unintentionally fell into standing at attention until Waller gave an almost imperceivable nod. Once you and Rick eased your posture Amanda introduced you both in turn before waving a hand towards the woman "This is Kristin Jameson. She's a leading scientist in meta and mutation studies"

You felt your heart stutter when Waller's eyes flickered towards you, only Rick's voice saying "Pleasure to meet you ma'am" keeping you grounded enough to manage "Nice to meet you ma'am" she smiled "Miss Waller has assured me Belle Reeve and ARGUS has a lot to offer to my studies and my upcoming lecture in DC"  You could see the amusement in Amanda's eyes when you swallowed hard as Rick asked "She studying prisoners?"

"Among others" Waller replied and you nodded sharply before she said "The two of you are to assist her in any way she needs as you have working relationships with a lot of Belle Reeve" "Yes ma'am" you spoke first, managing to keep your voice steady as you spoke, hoping like hell Rick wouldn't notice anything was off and quickly felt your heart fall when you realized his eyes were firmly on Kristin "You're dismissed for now. I'll let you know when she needs an escort or assistance"

You nodded and turned to walk out, hearing Kristin say it was nice to meet you both and Rick returning the sentiment. You couldn't be bothered to worry about it.You had to ignore the aching feeling in your chest at noticing how Rick's attention had been on her because of how Waller had been looking at you. Damn her. She'd do anything to prove she had the best tools at her disposal no matter who got hurt.

Rick caught up with you before you could get all the way back to your shared office which given how much longer his legs were there really wasn't a surprise there. "What do you think that's about?" he asked, watching you as you walked straight to your jacket and slipped it on despite having been warm just moments before. "Don't know" you spoke more to yourself than to him. 

He nodded towards your jacket "You good? I can turn the heat up?" you shook your head as you sat down in front of your computer. You had two stacks worth of paperwork to go through and your stacks were small compared to Rick's. "And heat you to death? No, I'll warm up in a few" you replied and he nodded slowly, a lazy smirk working its way onto his face "Unless you want body heat to warm you?" you cut your eyes up "I'll shoot you" and was rewarded with one of his laughs that made your entire body warm. You loved when he genuinely laughed, especially when considering most of the time only you were allowed to hear it. It felt like a part of him reserved only for you. "Just sayin" he shrugged.

So far Kristin had been around for a couple weeks and she'd yet to approach you about anything other than escorts to the prison. Maybe it wouldn't be that bad. Maybe you could get through this with your head and heart intact. You walked around a corner after delivering a stack of finished work to Christina and felt like you'd been dipped in ice water when you heard that same sound that normally warmed you to the core, Rick's laughter. This time it wasn't at your teasing or Boomer busting his ass falling off the ramp of a plane, no he was standing next to the coffee pot talking to Kristin. He was turned facing her and the way she was looking up at him made your stomach churn.

Why hadn't you seen it before? June. The one person Rick had let claim his heart. Genius, gorgeous and the exact same type of woman as Kristin Jameson. You'd been so concerned about her for other reasons you hadn't realized she was perfect for Rick but from looking at how they interacted there was a good chance they may have started to figure it out for themselves and that thought made you want to vomit. Fuck, you fucked up. If Rick got with Kristin, you'd have to be happy for him but you'd never be able to look him in the eyes again because he knew you too well. He'd know something was wrong and then you'd lose him for good.

You hadn't realized your attention had been so focused on them until you slammed into Anderson headed to the copy machine and papers went everywhere.

"Shit Anderson! I'm so sorry!" you muttered, crouching to help him collect the papers. He smiled at you "No problem but are you ok? I've never seen you so distracted besides that time Harley caught those squirrels and let em loose in Belle Reeve and you had to help catch em" you laughed at the memory of that chaos "Yeah, no I'm good. Maybe I'm going a little stir crazy? too much calm?" he shook his head "My dad always said marines were a different breed" you raised an eyebrow "Wasn't your dad a marine?" he nodded "Yeah" you laughed and handed him the papers you picked up "Sorry about that again. I'll watch where i'm going" 

You hadn't noticed your little debacle had earned Rick's attention because when you straightened up Kristin was gone and Rick was watching you. "You ok?" he mouthed and you nodded "Perfect" before turning on your heel, where you were going you weren't sure considering your office was a shared space but you needed to catch your breath without being within touching distance of Rick.

"You doing anything tonight?" Rick asked, perched on the edge of your desk. You barely glanced up from looking over the team list for the upcoming mission "Sleeping?" he reached for the file in your hand and took it before you could snatch it back. When you cut your eyes up at him the smile he gave you made your heart flip, god why had you ever thought you wouldn't fall for a man like Flag? The tact pants he wore hugged his thighs and legs beautifully and that damn black t shirt clung to his biceps and shoulders in a way that very well would've had any woman drooling and you were not exempt.  When he realized he had your attention on him he laughed "She does still have eyes! Been so long since I saw em I was startin to worry darlin" you rolled your eyes and held your hand out "Can I have that back Rick?"

He shook his head "Only when you tell me what I did to piss you off" you ran a hand across your face "Nothing Rick. It's just been a lot with babysittin the scientist, finding out we have an upcoming mission and oh yeah if we don't die on that mission we have to go play Waller's good little pets in D.C. nothing I love more than that" he nodded slowly "Then come over or let me come over. I miss spending time with you" 

You raised an eyebrow and saw a blush color his cheeks which considering the things the two of you had done, was short of comical "Not like that Y/N! Well I mean I wouldn't tell you no but I mean just spending time together, movie or dinner something like that. Catch our breath and talk without it being around files or team lists" oh boy this was it. Him telling you he wanted to pursue Kristin. Fuck, how were you gonna get out of this? "Maybe after the mission?" you offered and saw the way his shoulders dropped "The mission is still three days away" 

You nodded "We need to prep. Make sure we're as ready as we can be cause god knows Amanda isn't ever gonna tell us everything we need to know" he studied you for a second before finally saying "We promised to be honest with each other when we first became friends. I can tell when you're lying to me but I'm gonna pretend I can't and say ok sweetheart because that's what you want me to say. Whatever it is, you can tell me. You know I'm not gonna judge you and I'm always gonna have your back" "I know Rick and I will, I promise. This mission and everything just has my head a little crooked" he pushed himself up off your desk, standing to his full height before leaning over to place a kiss right under your right ear "I'll be here waiting to help you get it back straight whenever you'll let me" then passed you the file back before walking over to his own desk.

You looked up at him and he smiled before turning to his own work. You just had to get through this, right? 

Getting through it was easier said than done as it seemed. You were used to missions going a certain way or well what happened before missions. The suiting up, the debrief and the roll out to collect your team. 

You hadn't expected Kristin to still be at ARGUS. You hadn't known Waller had given her a desk or well maybe you had and buried the information but when you spotted her when you walked out of the debriefing you forced a smile onto your face. You were a lot of things but rude for no reason was not one of them.

You gave her a small nod and headed for transport telling Rick over your shoulder you'd meet him at the air strip. You looked back in just enough time to see her and him talking and felt your heart drop when he leaned down to say something in her ear. A mission was good. You could focus on something besides your heart breaking.

You slammed into the door leading outside and bit your cheek when the cold wind slammed into your face. Fuck, you'd forgot your jacket. No way were you going back inside. Maybe there would be an extra one in the squad's gear. You rubbed your hands across your arms and headed for the truck waiting to take you to pick up the team.

---------------------

You stepped out of the transport truck and locked the door into place so everyone could file out. Luckily it was the usual suspects so no one needed to hear the rundown about the implants in their necks or how much time they'd get off their sentences. 

No one had an extra jacket and you hadn't wanted to take Boomers bomber jacket or Harley's cropped leather one that they'd offered off their own back so you stood with your arms tightly crossed while they one by one unloaded from the truck then headed for the plane where Rick stood talking to the pilot. 

You hadn't looked his way since you stepped out of the truck. You were being childish. You'd known this day was coming. Rick Flag was a good man, anyone could see that. You couldn't hold it against Kristin even if you wanted nothing more than to.

Once the last member of the squad was off the truck and walking up the ramp of the plane you closed the door and slapped it "We're good!" The truck rumbled away so you took a deep breath before following the team.

--------------------

You tried to walk past Rick considering the pilot had even headed on-board to start the takeoff process but his hand shot out and wrapped around your right bicep.You cut your eyes at him and saw he was holding your jacket out with his other hand "You forgot this"

"Thanks" it was barely a mutter but you got it out. You took the jacket from him and he dropped your arm to allow you to slip it on. You could feel your arms start to thaw slightly as soon as the jacket was covering them. He nodded and looked up towards the plane then down towards his boots "Now's not the time. I know it but what is going on with us? We aren't ever this out of sync" 

You shrugged one shoulder "We're good Flag. Don't worry, please" you didn't want his focus to be split when you knew bullets would be flying in no time. He held your gaze and took a step closer, effectively eliminating what little distance had remained between the two of you and using his height over you to his advantage. His voice was deeper than usual when he spoke, his accent bleeding out "That right there is how I know we're not. Outside of joking you ain't called me Flag when we've been alone in years now"

You swallowed hard, ignoring how his voice made your entire body feel like a flame was licking across it. It was going to be hard to get over him. You raised your eyes to fully meet his and saw a bit of a smile threaten his face before it quickly fell when you asked "Did ya tell Kristin bye?" You saw the confusion spread across his face and used the opening to slip past him onto the plane. 

------------------------

"WHEELS UP IN FIVE" You hollered to the pilot as you took your seat next to Harley. "Yes ma'am" the pilot replied as Rick finally walked up the ramp and sat down across the walkway from you, his eyes drilling into you but you refused to look at him. You had to focus on this mission. 

Harley bumped your boot with her own and you looked at her "Where'd ya find ya jacket?" You nodded towards Rick "Our fearless leader brought it to me" you could see the muscles in his jaw clench at your words. You never referred to him as team leader because you ran the squad together but Waller had introduced him as leader to Kristin. 

"Awe that was sweet of ya Flag" she laughed and he nodded, eyes never leaving you "I'm less of an asshole than given credit for"  You didn't want to be the first to break eye contact but knew you had to. The squad would get restless if you and Rick were arguing before takeoff. When you let your eyes drift to Harley she struck up a conversation about getting you a jacket to match her own. You half heartedly listened because while normally you actually did enjoy her company your attention was currently on the set of eyes you could still feel on you. Yeah this was going to be a long mission.

-----------------------

You were pinned down with Harley and two bodies of fallen squad members. This shitty mission had gone from bad to worse. "Corporal, report!" Waller's voice echoed through the com in your ear. You met Harley's eyes, both of your chests heaving with every breath "Sorry, kinda busy right now. Check on Colonel Flag and I'll report soon if I'm not dead" You clicked the button on your com so you could hear chatter but they couldn't hear you. A bullet whizzed right past Harley's ear causing you both to flinch. You eyed the doorway that was separating you from getting the hell out of this. The only problem? Someone had to get it open. Easier said than done when every time these assholes even thought they saw either of you they started shooting.

"Toots, you know I love ya but I think we may be screwed" you huffed out a breath, forming a plan that was really really bad but the only option you had. You dug the two computer drives out of the pocket of your pants and held them out to Harley "Keep these in one piece and when I say go, get that damn door open. That is your only focus, not me, not bullets. Understood?" She tucked the computer drives away but looked confused "How are you gonna block em?" You gave her a tight lipped smile "Just trust me Harls and if we get outta this I'll make sure this one is twenty off"

She nodded and slid to the edge of the half fallen wall you'd taken shelter behind. You checked the automatic rifle in your hands, along with the two 9mm you carried. All you had to do was buy her twenty seconds tops. "Now" you breathed, stepping out to draw their fire.

You heard Harley's boots hitting the floor as she ran and the sound of the chain on the door giving way but couldn't turn your attention from the hail of bullets. You thought you were clear and had gotten lucky. Three were down, two had been called back to pursue Rick's half of the team. You made the mistake of glancing back to ensure your footing was clear and felt a bullet tear through your right side, just above your hip. 

Harley screamed your name as you stumbled, hand clutching your side but you shook your head "Dammit move Quinn!" her eyes went wide when she saw how much blood was gushing from between your fingers. "Flag's gonna kill me" "Flag will be fine" you told her from between gritted teeth. You needed to get somewhere secure to dig into your med kit but with Harley here, there was no way she wouldn't want to help. "Just help me move, please" you begged and she moved to your left side, throwing your arm over her shoulder. 

The two of you ran sloppily through the halls, clearing the corners as best as you could until you came to what appeared to be a janitor's closet. "This'll work" "Work for what? You're gonna bleed to death!" she nearly squealed and you shook your head, feeling dizzy from the movement and blood you'd lost "No I wont. I just need you to trust me and to know I can trust you" "You can trust me" she helped you into the closet and down into a sitting position.

You fumbled twice for your med kit before her hands covered yours "Tell me what to do" you leaned back against the wall, closing your eyes against a rush of pain "We need bandages, forceps to dig out the bullet and a few of the pyro packs that are in there" "pyro packs?" she asked and your eyes flew open to glare at her "Ok ok" she dug out the metallic bags that read "Caution. Burn Risk" and looked them over "What now?" you swallowed twice "Open them up" she did as you asked, being careful to not let the material touch her skin before looking up at you. You smiled "Now's time to dig the bullet out" she shook her head "How about I go find Flag! Or we call him over the coms? That man would fight this whole place to get to you"

You shook your head "No time. You're who's here" she nodded and grabbed the forceps. You managed a smile "It's gonna hurt me but you're not. Dig in,find the bullet and snatch it out. The moment the bullet comes out, put the entire contents of both bags directly into the wound. Don't question it. Then bandage it up" She swallowed loudly then nodded "Fuck, I wish someone was here to hold your hand" you laughed "I got it Harley. Just do it" you leaned your head back and closed your eyes as you felt the cold forceps touch the edges of the wound followed by the excruciating pain of Harley trying to secure the bullet "You got it" you breathed and she pulled it out. 

You heard the metallic twang of it hitting the floor before she poured the heat pack into it. You let out a breath at the familiar warmth flooding your system. Your entire body relaxed into itself as that gene inherited from your grandmother kicked in. You could feel the muscles and flesh that had been shredded by the bullet begin to knit themselves back together as Harley taped a gauze over the wound that had already stopped bleeding. Her eyes widened at the lack of blood "Wanna tell me what that was?" you shook your head "And Rick doesn't find out I got shot" she held your gaze and a silent understanding passed. You smiled weakly "Give me a few breaths then I'll be able to get on my feet. Blood loss is a bitch" "Even to someone like you?" Harley guessed quietly and you nodded "Yeah, even to someone like me"

--------------------

By the time you were able to get your feet under you Rick was screaming across the coms "GOD DAMMIT Y/N. WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?"  Harley winked at you and hit her com "Easy Flaggy. We got a little pinned down. We lost the two new kids" "Fuck. Are you two ok?" you hit your com "We're good Rick. Retrieved what we came for. See you at evac?" he took a deep breath after you spoke and his voice was a bit more gentle when he said "Yeah. See you at evac" 

When you and Harley burst out the building you made a run for the chopper where Flag stood outside of. He smiled slightly when he saw the two of you then his eyes trailed down to the blood soaking you and it quickly dropped. You stopped to let Harley get on board and he snatched you close enough you could hear him over the rotors "What happened to you not being hurt?" you glanced down and shrugged "Who said this is my blood? Now light this bitch up and let's go home" 

You squeezed into the chopper between Rick and the pilot, watching as the building beneath you all burnt to ash once you were high enough to detonate. You could feel sleep tugging at you, a side effect of healing a wound that would've killed any other human but you couldn't sleep yet. You still had to get to the plane home. You felt your eyelids flutter but shook your head to resist and knew Rick noticed when he moved close enough his shoulder was right in place with your head that all you had to do was barely lean over to be resting against it.

You wanted to resist but fuck you were tired and he was so warm, your body craved the extra heat to help replace the blood loss faster..before you knew it he was waking you up to move from the chopper to the plane and once again on the plane you let yourself fall asleep against him again...if he was ending the intimacy between the two of you once you made it home you could enjoy it now plus the added bonus that you would have replinished the lost blood and not be weak for the debrief with Waller.

Harley curled up to your back like a cat and for once you didn't try to stop her, whether she knew you needed to raise your core temp or she was just tired you didn't care. It was a cocoon of warmth that lulled your aching body to sleep.

----------------------

You followed Rick through the halls toward Waller's office. While he'd been signing everyone back in at Belle Reeve you'd managed to change your shirt at least, fuck your dry cleaner got half your salary at this point. He kept eyeing the blood that stained your pants and you hoped he hadn't figured out from the spill pattern that it had indeed come from you. The bandage itched like crazy which meant the skin was mended or almost. You had luckily found a dark enough colored shirt no one could tell the bandage was there.

Once you walked through the bullpen you were glad to see Kristin at least wasn't there. You weren't sure if you could keep up being polite. You followed Rick into Waller's office and stood back while he went through the basics of the missions and handed over the computer drives and other files that had been recovered. She listened, stoic as always then dismissed the both of you. 

You walked slowly behind Rick, fighting the urge to scratch at your side. You knew he would probably hold you to the whole getting together after the mission like you promised, but you hoped he'd let you off the hook for the time being.  When the two of you hit the parking lot before you ever had a chance to shiver his jacket was draped across your shoulders. You looked back at him and he shrugged "Yours was soaked in blood Darlin" you felt your heart flip at how gentle his voice was. "Rick, I don't want to talk tonight, please"

You headed for your jeep but before you could get the door open he caught your arm and spun you around so your back was to the side of the jeep and he was as close as he could get without invading your personal space, one hand resting just over your head on the jeep and the other hovering above your hip "No, I think we need to talk. Your choice whether it's here or your place" you swallowed hard at the warmth radiating off of him. How the fuck did this man smell so damn good after a mission like that? You wanted to bury yourself in him. "My place" you finally said after a moment and he smiled before leaning down to let his lips brush against your neck "Good girl" you shivered lightly before shoving against his chest "Go get your truck! We both need a shower!" he groaned "Damn, I can't shower with you after missions. You try to fuckin cook me" "Cry baby" you teased before gently shoving him again "Now go, I'll meet you there"

-----------------------

You stood under the stream of the shower watching the pink tinged water spin down the drain. Damn, you'd had more blood on you than you'd thought. After washing your hair and body, your fingers found the new scar decorating your side. If it was on anyone else and you were asked how old the scar was you would say at least a couple weeks, old enough that the skin wasn't still soft and sensitive but still new enough it was a light pink color. Maybe it was better that Rick was ending things, at least you wouldn't have to explain weird scars anymore. If he touched you like this there's no way he wouldn't notice the scar and you weren't sure you could play it off as him just having never noticed it. 

You heard a knock at your door and knew it was Rick. You sighed and turned the water off before grabbing your robe. You'd let him in then get dressed. If he insisted on having this conversation tonight he could very damn well wait in your living room while you got dressed. 

When you unlocked the door and swung it open his eyes trailed down your body and a look passed over his face that made a different kind of heat roll through you. No, you weren't going there. "Well damn sweetheart, I'm overdressed" he teased and you rolled your eyes, running the towel in your hand over your hair "Very funny. I just got out of the shower. I was caked in blood" he nodded "Yeah, that's what took me so long to get here" he leaned down as if to kiss you but you side stepped. At his confused expression you pointed towards your bedroom "I'm gonna go get some clothes on. Want to pour some of that whiskey Simon sent me for my birthday?"  

If you were having your heart ripped out you needed something strong to keep up a front and god bless your sergeant he always sent you a bottle of the good shit every year. Rick nodded and headed for your kitchen while you made a beeline for your room. You could hear him opening cabinets but focused on finding comfortable clothes. After a while you decided on a tank and sleep shorts. The tank was tight enough no bra was required. After running a brush through your hair you took a final look in the mirror then took a step into the living room. Rick looked up from where he'd been leaning against your kitchen counter apparently watching your bedroom door. He'd kicked his shoes off and his jacket was across the back of your couch. The way he looked at you made your skin flush, you had to reel it in. He was too important to lose because he no longer wanted to sleep with you.

You walked across the floor to him and he held out a glass tumblr of the whiskey. "Thank you sir" you whispered before downing almost the entire thing in one gulp. His eyes widened slightly. "That kind of night?"  You scoffed "You could say that" he was still sipping on his glass and a part of you had an urge to grab his and down it just for the burn of it. You tapped your nails along your glass "What was so important Rick?" you asked looking up at him and he laughed "Always straight to the point with you"

You shrugged "Well I mean no point in beating around the bush here" you gulped down what was left in your glass then sat it down. He swallowed his then reached for your hip, pulling you closer to him "C'mere. I've missed being alone with you" you let him pull you against his chest but braced your palms against the hard muscles to keep some distance between you even as he tried yet again to kiss you and you turned your head "Did I do something wrong? I don't think I broke any of the rules" he asked, settling to kiss the top of your head as his hands settled on your hips.

You laughed lightly "You did nothing Rick but I know what you want to talk about" he pulled back to look down at you and he looked uncertain? "You do?" you nodded "You're my friend Rick, probably one of my closest friends if not closest anymore. You're important to me and I wouldn't want to lose you but I ain't really a fuck me goodbye type. You don't fuckin want me? cool. You want Kristin? I get it, she's your type but I don't have to like it nor do I have to see it flaunted in my face so if I'm distant for a while don't take it personal" He took a step back, untucking himself from around you. 

You watched as he shook his head, running a hand down his face before he looked at you and laughed. The noise still managing to wrap itself around you despite being at your expense "You've been jealous?" "No I haven't" you argued and he took a step closer, whispering your name. 

You shook your head "I knew what this was from the start" "Still not answering the question" he took another step and you unintentionally took a step backwards "She's a scientist and gorgeous" he nodded "Yeah" a flame of anger flickered through you at him admitting it that easily and to your face.  "I knew whatever this was wouldn't last from the moment we met her" you breathed and he took two steps towards you which caused you to take two steps backwards and you cursed when you felt your back hit the counter. He planted a hand on either side of you, palm flat down on the counter and leaned down to speak into the shell of your ear "Still avoiding the fact that you've been downright mean to me because you've been jealous"

You turned your head slightly to meet his eyes, trying to ignore how close your face was and how you'd barely have to lean in for your lips to find his "Yes! Ok? Fuck you Rick! I've been fucking jealous! For so long I've been at your side, leading the squad and dealing with Waller's bullshit, having your back and you having mine. I've been in your bed, you've been in mine and I fooled myself into thinking just because I wouldn't want anyone else that you wouldn't either and now I have to sit back and watch you be with her and pretend that it's not hurting me to not lose you completely so yes I am fucking jealous that she'll have you. Happy?"

His eyes studied your face for a heartbeat and you could feel your heart stutter. Normally you could read Rick's emotions fairly easily but this was once you had no clue what was going on in that head of his. After what felt like too long he laughed again, lighter this time before closing the distance between the two of you. The first brush of his lips against yours drove reason out of your mind. You knew it was a bad idea, a clean break healed easier but fuck you needed this man like you needed air.

His hands moved to your hips, easily picking you up and sitting you on the counter so he could step between your legs. His tongue slipped past your lips, teasing yours as he swallowed the moan that escaped you. Your hands tangled themselves in his hair, tugging gently. When the need for air forced the two of you apart he moved from your lips to kiss down your jaw then to your neck. One of his hands slipped between your thighs, cupping your clothed core as he bit down on your pulse point then sucked the skin into his mouth. a broken sob of a moan that was somewhere between a praise and a curse falling from your lips. 

When your brain caught up to the fact that he was marking you, visibly you shoved a hand against his chest "Rick, stop" he froze the moment the words left you,hands moving off your body and lips leaving your skin. His broad chest was heaving as he looked down at you through heavy lashes "What's wrong sweetheart?" it took you two times to manage to get enough air in your lungs to actually form coherent thoughts "What kind of fucking response is marking me?" he grinned "I thought a clear enough one" he leaned in again to brush a gentle kiss against your lips "I don't want Kristin. I haven't wanted to talk about her. I want you. I only agreed to these damn rules because you freaked after the first time we slept together and I couldn't stand the idea of you running away from me" 

You swallowed hard, this was Rick. The best man you'd ever met, the only man you'd ever truly could imagine something with. "You want me?" you asked in such a small voice you flinched. He pushed your hair back out of your face, hand cupping the back of your neck as he kissed your forehead then the tip of your nose then your cheek before his lips found yours, a lingering kiss full of every promise he couldn't put words to "Every part of you" you felt a twinge of guilt when you thought about the parts he didn't know about. "Rick, I.." he cut you off with another kiss before saying "Darlin, anything you want to tell me you can but please let me take you to bed. I've never got to go to sleep with you in my arms and wake up with you there" you nodded slowly and started to climb off the counter but instead he pulled you into his arms giving you no choice but to wrap your arms around his waist "I can walk Rick!" you squealed and he nipped at your throat "I prefer this" 

-----------------------

You were half asleep with Rick's head laid on your bare stomach. Even after so many times of the two of you sleeping together he'd treated you like this was the first time, exploring every inch of skin. You were spent from how many times he'd pushed you to that brink and over so you were currently just enjoying the feeling of him exploring the body.

He kissed passed your navel and you felt him still right before his fingers grazed the new scar on your right side "Baby where'd this come from?" you tried to control your heart rate because you knew he could hear it from where he was laying. You leaned up slightly to look and shrugged "I'm not sure honestly" his lips trailed across it "It wasn't there the last time we had sex" You laid back against the pillow, trailing your fingers through his hair "Are you sure?" when you cut your eyes back down at him he was giving you that "Cut the bullshit" look "Fairly certain I've kissed every inch of you multiple times" you shrugged "I honestly don't know Rick" he finally nodded before making his way up your body.

When he got to your lips he kissed you gently before pulling you over to lay across his chest. Your fingers traced the mark he'd insisted you give him to match the one he'd planted on your neck "What about Waller?" you asked and he scoffed "That bitch sees us as tools, weapons. As long as we're effective she doesn't give a shit. Hell she'd probably he thrilled to have more shit to hold over our heads" 

You shook your head "Yeah, I don't like the idea of her using me to make you jump through hoops" he smiled before brushing his lips against yours "She's had the power to do that for a lot longer than you think" "Oh" you said quietly and he nodded "Don't worry, we'll handle it as it comes. Now let me hold you since I've never been allowed to" you laughed and turned to tuck your back against his chest. He pulled you as close to him as he could before placing a kiss to your bare shoulder "Get some sleep. We can handle the crazy tomorrow" 

If Waller noticed a shift between you and Rick she didn't comment on it. Your work dynamic didn't change, hell it shocked you to realize a lot of your dynamic didn't change. Had you and Rick been a couple and you were the last to realize?

You were finishing up paperwork when a knock at the office door made you look up to see Kristin standing there "Hey" you spoke and she smiled "Hey" she cut her eyes at Rick who looked busy at work but you knew he was listening to every word then back at you "Can I buy you a coffee so we can talk?" you felt your stomach knot but nodded nonetheless. You stood up and grabbed your jacket off the back of your chair, walking around your desk. You tapped Rick's on the way by "Want me to bring your usual back?" he looked from you to Kristin, a silent ask of if you were ok in his eyes. You gave him a smile so he nodded "Yeah. Thanks" 

You turned to Kristin and smiled "Your car or my jeep" she shrugged "Your jeep is fine by me" you waved a hand towards the exit "Then let's go. Any excuse to leave that Waller wont blow a coronary about is fine by me" when she laughed a part of you felt bad about how much you'd disliked her when you thought there was something between her and Rick "Can't blame you there. I'd offer for you to bring Colonel Flag but I think you'll want this conversation to just be the two of us" ok that made you nervous but you both knew she couldn't say anything further in the building so you nodded "Rick's a big boy. He can amuse himself while I'm gone"

---------------------

You sat across from Kristin, staring down into your coffee and trying to process what she'd just told you "So the military is doing what exactly? experiments with meta and mutation genes?" she nodded "They're trying to form better soldiers. Find better mutations to see if humans could develop them,from the medical records Amanda released on you, how your blood has healed the squad even without them knowing..they're going to want samples before the lectures in D.C" 

You nodded slowly "How much blood? Are they going to try to drain me here?" you could feel yourself start to panic, not for yourself as much as the fact that you knew if they came for you the three most important people to you would be willing to die to save you,Rick of course along with Sergeant Simon O'Reilly and Staff Sergeant Johnny Moore. Not to mention if they knew of your genes they may know of Johnny's.

"I've made a deal for one vial of bone marrow and that is it. That was the best I could do, I'm sorry. I never meant for my research to be bastardized like this" you could tell she meant every word so you reached across the table to gently take her hand in yours, squeezing it lightly "Thank you for fighting for me and for not exposing me to Rick before I'm ready" she nodded and in turn squeezed your hand "If it's any help, if it was me,no matter how bad of dealings I'd had in the past nothing could change my feelings for my wife. I've seen the way Rick looks at you. That man worships the ground you walk on. He won't be angry at you for who you are but he may be angry for you feeling like you had to hide who you are from him all this time" you knew she was right but you were so deep now how the hell were you supposed to get out of the hole?

-------------------------

JM: Fuck the government 

SO: Video call asap luv

The moment you rolled over and checked your phone you knew that Johnny had been cornered about his genes as well. While you had a healing mutation he carried a different type, he found at a young age he could manipulate time around him. Slow it down or speed it up. Made him hell on the battlefield. "Fuck" you cursed under your breath, forgetting Rick was in the bed with you until his arm encircled your waist and his lips brushed the base of your spine "Somethin wrong?" his accent was always heavier when he just woke up. You turned to place a quick kiss on his lips "No baby. Johnny and Simon just got into some shit and need me to call em" he chuckled "Always pulling the men in your life outta the fire" you winked over your shoulder at him "Someone has to" before slipping out of his bedroom and out into the living room.

You hit the buttons on your phone and within a few seconds both Simon and Johnny's faces were on your screen "There she is" Simon spoke first, his irish accent making your lips quirk up. Johnny leaned closer to his phone "Hold on now. That isn't your place" you felt your face warm when both of their eyebrows shot up. "Has our little spitfire got herself a boyfriend?" Simon chuckled and you rolled your eyes "Wasn't there a reason for this call?" Johnny nodded with a grin "Yeah but we can get to that in a minute" you shook your head "No, now" they both laughed then went into telling you how Johnny had gotten the call about a vial of bone marrow having to be given. "Yeah, I did too," you whispered. "Are we fucked?" Johnny asked and you shrugged "I hope not? I've got to escort Waller and the leading scientist to DC for the lectures behind the science so maybe I can dig more" 

Simon grinned "Good, we'll be there too" "Really?" you asked with a  matching grin because you hadn't seen both of them together in person in years. "Yeah, someone has to represent the corps considering someone got pulled over to the redacted sides of things" Johnny teased and you shook your head "Please Moore, once a marine always a marine" "You better remember that" he laughed then he whistled to get Simon's attention and you knew what they were thinking before Simon ever asked "So, who is this mystery fella that got our little lassie to settle down?" 

Before you could say anything the bedroom door opened behind where you stood in the center of the living room and Rick walked out behind you, shirtless. Johnny and Simon both spoke over each other "Good morning Colonel Flag!" the shit eating grins on their faces made you want to stab the both of them considering you could just give them blood and heal them afterwards. He looked from you to the phone before nodding "Simon, Johnny" 

Rick stopped to kiss your cheek "I'm making coffee" then headed for the kitchen. You finally looked back to your phone screen to see Simon had his arms crossed and Johnny was shaking his head "We need to discuss a dowry" "I want to know his intentions!" "Goodbye boys! See you in D.C!" you laughed before hanging up the call.

Rick leaned against the counter when you looked up and motioned towards your phone "They're gonna be in D.C?" you nodded and he smiled "Might not be that bad then if you get to catch up with them" you shook your head with a laugh "Or may be worse, with them there is no way to tell" 

----------------------------

The day you went to give the bone marrow you were grateful for the healing you possessed because that shit hurt. You were still limping slightly when you got back to the office but Rick was luckily at Belle Reeve handling something about someone trying to make an army of possums. When you walked into your office you realized it was warmer than normal and a coffee was sitting on your desk, still steaming. A box sat next to the cup of coffee and when you opened it there was a small thing of what looked like hand cream inside with a note from Kristin "This is a more diluted version of what's in your pyro packs. It'll help" you smiled and sat down gently in the chair, wishing like hell you could help Johnny because he'd be in pain for a few days from this shit at least.

By the time Rick got back your hip was a dull ache and you'd turned the heat down in the office. He closed the door behind him and shook his head "Twenty six" you laughed at how tired he looked from chasing giant rodents over how he normally looked after missions. He walked around your desk and leaned down to place a gentle kiss to your lips "Your physical go ok?" you nodded "All clear for another year" he smiled "Good to know" you hated lying to him but how the hell did you bring it up in conversation now?

D.C. was gorgeous as always. The lectures were being held in a nearby conference hall that was so far locked down you were surprised the guest list didn't require a dna scan to get in the front door. Day one was casual, meaning you and Rick were both in suits. The skirt you wore hit just above your knees and you'd caught Rick being distracted more than once and had to remind him that the two of you were supposed to be looking the part of guards for Waller, that was why she'd allowed your holsters to be worn in plain sight.

His hand skimmed your lower back and he whispered in your ear "Something about you in a skirt and armed is just beyond sexy" you shook your head with a laugh "Easy soldier. We have time for that later" you just hoped Waller had nothing else up her sleeve. Johnny and Simon had landed about an hour after your plane but you hadn't met up with them yet, you hoped to see them soon but Waller had to dismiss you and Rick for you to be able to socialize anyways.

The two of you walked in behind Waller, you on her left and Rick on her right. She headed for the front of the room so you trailed behind like good puppies. She greeted an older gentleman who eyed you "Amanda" she introduced both you and Rick by rank. the older gentleman nodded to you both "Colonel, Corporal" 

The next two hours went pretty much like that until the blessed time came that she disappeared into meetings that you nor Rick had clearance for so you were dismissed until summoned. Rick cut his eyes at you considering you were still in the conference hall "Well we got a couple hours" you felt a smirk pulling at your lips until you heard an accented voice say "Nope, if she's not busy you gotta share her" you turned to see Simon and Johnny walking towards you. 

"Simon!" you greeted, pulling him into a hug first then when Johnny pouted letting him go to pull the other man into one as well. You looked them over and couldn't help but laugh. Both were around Rick's height, Simon maybe had an inch on him. Johnny had dark black hair and bright blue eyes while Simon had honey brown hair and the darkest green eyes you'd ever seen. Both were decent looking men and despite the suits they were clearly being made for them they looked so damn uncomfortable it was pathetic.

Johnny held onto your waist and looked over your head at Rick "Flag. Treating our girl well?" he nodded "Of course" Simon winked at you before saying "I think we should all go to lunch while you two are free. Me and Johnny want to have a talk with Rick" you spun out of Johnny's arms to playfully glare at him and he laughed "C'mon lassie, think the colonel gonna scare off that easy?" Rick cleared his throat and when the three of you looked at him he waved towards the exit "Let's go get lunch" then reached for your hand. When you let him take it you heard Simon chuckle "oh he's gonna be fun"

They'd known Rick for a while now but knowing him as your partner versus knowing him as your boyfriend? That was two very different experiences. You shot a look over your shoulder at Simon "Behave Sergeant" he winked at you "Don't worry luv. If he can hold up under you me and Johnny wont phase him"  

---------------------

"Oh I absolutey did fuckin not!" you laughed, tossing a mozzarella stick at Johnny across the table. He was currently embellishing a story about one night when your unit had gone for drinks in Germany and a bar fight had ensued. Rick cut his eyes at you, a grin pulling at his lips "I don't know baby, sounds like something you'd do" you mock gasped then looked at Simon for backup "A little help here Sergeant?" he shook his head "You're on your own luv" you tsk tsked "Three men like yourselves ganging up on a defenseless woman" that made all of them bust out laughing "You're a lot of things, defenseless ain't one of em"  Rick teased pulling you closer so he could place a kiss on your temple.

Simon gave you a look at the action and you felt yourself warm even before he reached for your hand "C'mon Corporal, let's go pay the tabs" Rick passed you his card before you could ever reach for your own and Johnny made an approving sound before you glared at him and he raised his hands in defense "I said nothing!"

You followed Simon across the little bar and grill the four of you had chosen, waiting for him to ask. He managed to wait until the waitress came back with your receipts "Have ya told him?" "Told him what?" you decided on the innocent route but knew that would fall flat "About your.." he paused when someone passed by before deciding on "diagnosis" you didn't meet his eyes and that was answer enough "How the hell have you kept it from him this long?" you shrugged "It hasn't been easy believe me and that was before I started sleeping with him" 

He shook his head with a laugh "How did that come about anyways?" you shrugged again "Shit happens?" this time he was the one to shrug "Foundation of some of the most solid relationships right there. I may be overstepping but can I ask, do ya love him?" you opened your mouth to deny it then closed it back when no sound would immediately come out. Did you love Rick? When a few seconds passed with you neither confirming nor denying he put a hand on your shoulder and squeezed gently "If he cares about you as much as I believe he does it won't matter to him. Didn't matter to me when I found out about you or Johnny"  you nodded slowly "Thanks Si" he smiled "Anytime luv" before the two of you headed back to the table.

---------------------

For the next few days whenever you and Rick weren't at Waller's beck and call you ended up making sure to carve out time in your day for Simon and Johnny. You hadn't realized how much you'd missed them. You and Rick had just made it back to your room from a bar with them when you finally decided on having enough liquid courage to tell him the truth. 

You watched him close the door and lock it as you slipped your shoes off then walked over to where he stood, leaned back against the door, watching you with an unreadable expression "Rick?" he seemed to break out of whatever trance he'd been in and smiled before pulling you into his arms. "I'm glad to see you having fun catching up with your guys sweetheart. I can tell they missed you and you missed them: You nodded, letting your hand trail down the front of his shirt to begin working on the buttons of it "I want to talk to you about something important" His hands covered yours, stopping you from disrobing him any further "Are you transferring from ARGUS?" "What?" you froze at his question because even if you wanted to you couldn't for five more years and even then you'd want him to leave with you. 

He slipped his shirt off and tossed it onto the bed before crashing his lips against yours in a kiss that was hungry and rushed. You kissed him back, trying to pull him closer until he suddenly broke away from you "If you want to transfer I'll support you, it's just..:" he trailed off and leaned down to place a kiss on your neck before continuing "I love you and I want you to be happy but I can't pretend it won't hurt to be away from you"

You damn near stumbled back from him in shock and wanted to kick yourself for how defeated he looked "I'm sorry. It's too soon. I shouldn't have sprung that on you and I'm not wanting a response I just wanted to tell you" he ran a hand through his hand and moved to step around you "I'm gonna go shower" your hand moved to grab his before he could get too far past you "Rick, wait"

The moment he turned you pulled him into a kiss. He hesitated at first then gave in quickly, his hands moving down to grip your thighs and lift you into his arms. You wrapped your legs around his waist, breaking away from his lips to kiss across his jaw and down his neck before finally saying "I love you Rick and as much as I miss them I'm not leaving" the smile he gave you made your heart jump "Really?" you nodded and he leaned his head over on your neck "Thank god" then caught your lips in another kiss before walking you over to the bed and gently laying you down on it before climbing up your body, slipping your shirt off and leaving a trail of kisses as he did so.

When he got back to your lips he smiled "In that case can whatever you needed to tell me wait? Because the way these jeans fit has had my dick half hard all night" a laugh fell from you that quickly turned into a moan when he rutted his hips down into yours to prove a point "It can wait"

Unfortunately for you it seemed fate saw fit for Rick to find out one way or another.

You stood next to Rick, both of you studying the room around you. The highest value targets in the free world were currently in attendance so nerves were a bit high to say the least. Simon and Johnny were working the north exit while the two of you were covering the south. A few more teams were set up throughout but you didn't trust any of them the way you trusted your guys.

So far you'd heard three lecturers drone on and on along with a few people that were definitely on Waller's christmas card list. You would be glad for the next three hours to be over. You were just about to crack a joke to Rick about the man currently on stage when one of the other team's voices cut through your com "We've had a security breach. Level one evac" 

"Fuck" you and Rick both swore as you moved in unison. Each team of guards had been assigned four targets each to move. You had Waller, Kritstin and two more. Once they were secure you would come back and help as you were needed. You spotted Johnny and Simon herding their targets towards the stairwell leading up to the helipad as you grabbed Kristin and pushed her in front of you. "Move" Rick took point going up the stairwell with you guarding the rear.

Once your targets were loaded and gone you headed back down, meeting Simon and Johnny halfway. "What is this shit?" you asked and Johnny met your eyes "Extremists for humankind purity" Fuck. That was a hate group targeting anyone with mutant or meta genes and there were civilians here. "Fuckin assholes" Rick cursed and Simon smirked slighlty "Lets show em Flag" Rick nodded so Simon looked at you "You with Johnny, Flag with me"

Rick looked at you "Stay safe" you winked at him "Always" then bumped your shoulder to Johnny's "Like old times. Lets get it" 

----------------------------

You fell into a rhythm with Johnny so damn easy it was like no time at all had passed. You could feel the pull of his power simply because you knew what to look for but it helped the two of you to clear civilians out faster and take enemies down easier. The banquet hall looked like a fuckin war zone and that description was a little too accurate for your liking. 

You saw Simon and Rick take another group out and was about to call an all clear when you saw a barrel blast half a second before a bullet tore through the air towards you. Johnny was too far away to slow it so you were helpless but to feel the consuming burn which was so different from the one that healed you as it ripped through your abdomen and came out the other side. Johnny took out the shooter and was to your side in a heartbeat pulling you into his lap. You saw a few grazes on his arms and what looked like a knife slash on his face. Your hand shakingly moved to your stomach, a gasp of pain leaving you when you touched the wound "Fuck, it hurts Johnny" "I know baby. I know" he was already stripping his shirt off to hold pressure. "SIMON" he screamed as Rick and Simon came running in. Rick screamed your name and fell to his knees at your side "What the fuck happened?"

Your eyes moved to Rick's face and you saw tears threatening to fall "It's ok Rick. I'm ok" he shook his head "Sweetheart" Simon shouldered him out of the way "Move Flag" Rick's eyes turned hard "I'm not leaving her" Simon moved to pull you out of Johnny's lap and into his arms "Then you'll be what kills her and I'm not losing her either. We know how to save her. Now on your feet and lead us to her luggage or get the hell out of the way" Rick looked to you, tears working their way down his face and you nodded, grimacing from pain "Trust them" "Follow me" Rick told Simon before heading towards the stairwell leading up towards the rooms, all three men taking three steps at a time.

----------------------------

Rick argued you needed a hospital. Simon argued him and Johnny could help you just fine and you told him that they could so he was pacing the room, watching Johnny dig through your med kit and throw different things onto the bed next to where Simon had laid you. Simon ripped open four metallic bags and Rick watched as he poured them directly into your gunshot wound after ensuring there were no bullet fragments in, your screaming during that time had nearly made him kill both men. He could hear your teeth grit from where he stood, even when you whispered something to Johnny who whispered something back before finally sighing and leaned down to let you wipe your  blood soaked fingers across his face and the grazes on his arms. What the fuck was going on? 

You could imagine what was going through Rick's head but you were focusing on not dying at the moment, then arguing with Johnny to take enough blood for where he'd been grazed and sliced. Eventually Simon gingerly bandaged your stomach then looked over at Rick before looking back at you "We'll be nearby luv" You grabbed his hand "Thank you" he smiled "Always"

You tried to push yourself up into a sitting position and Rick moved to help you, being careful of your stomach. You noticed his hands shake slightly, "Y/N?" he was looking at your bandage. The bleeding had already stopped. You smiled slightly "I meant when I said I love you Rick, please know that" he sat down slowly on the side of the bed to not jostle you before taking your hand "And I meant it when I told you I love you but what's going on" You swallowed hard before saying "I have a meta mutation gene"

"Healing?" he asked and you nodded "The packs are called pyro packs, they force my core temperature to rise high enough to jumpstart the process. As long as it's not my heart or head and I get help fast enough I can heal from an injury" "The scar on your side" he spoke and you grimaced "I got shot on the last mission and talked Harley through the first aid"  

He nodded, running a hand over his head "So Harley knows?" you shrugged "Kind of?" "Who definitely knows?" he asked in a small voice so you took a breath before saying "Waller, Kristin, Johnny and Simon." he nodded slowly "Can I ask why you didn't trust me?" when you finally looked at him your heart crumpled "I didn't want you to look at me differently" 

He reached for your hand and when you let him take it his shoulder sagged slightly "You're still you. There's nothing that would change that to me. I just don't know why it took something like this for you to tell me" 

You felt tears start to slip free from your eyes and he quickly brushed them away "Don't cry darlin. Please don't cry" you leaned into his touch "Do you hate me Rick?" he shook his head "Never. You hear me? Nothing could ever make me hate me, especially not something like this" you smiled as he leaned closer and brushed a gentle kiss onto your lips before pausing "How many times have you healed me?" you grinned with your forehead against his "More times than you probably want to know" 

He laughed and pressed another kiss to your lips "You'll have to teach me how to take care of you" "I will" you promised and he smiled against your lips "Good, because you're not getting rid of me that easily Corporal" you laughed before saying "Nice to know because I kind of want to keep you Colonel" 

[girlgenius1111]

instincts

alexia x reader mila verse :) having a newborn is, notoriously, not easy. it catches up to you. alexia is there to pick up the pieces and make sure you know how loved you are. angst + fluff! 🙂

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When Alexia entered the house, it was to the sound of the baby crying, which wasn’t an oddity; babies cried. What was weird was that Mila’s little voice sounded raw, as though she’d been crying for a while. Alexia sighed, expecting that it had been another rough day for you. Mila had been going through a sleep regression, and would truly only sleep if she was in either your arms or your wife’s. You were exhausted, neither of you getting much sleep at all. Alexia, though, got to go to training everyday and get out of the house. You, on the other hand, spend all day with the baby, the crying baby who barely let you put her down. 

You’d been struggling in the past week, and Alexia couldn’t tell if it was exhaustion, related to PPD, or something else entirely. There hadn’t been a ton of time for the two of you to talk, but as Alexia heard her daughter wailing from the nursery, and your soft voice shushing her, she knew, somehow, that you weren’t okay. 

She was proved correct when she walked into the nursery and found you in tears, cradling your daughter close to you. Mila’s head was laid on your shoulder, her face red from crying, though she quieted slightly upon seeing her Mami. 

“Please, Milabear, please stop crying, honey, I don’t know what else you want,” you choked out, not wanting to further upset Mila with your emotions. 

“Amor, give her here,” Alexia said softly, catching your attention when she walked into the room. 

“She hasn’t slept all morning, Alexia,” you began, your wife nodding sympathetically, and taking Mila from your arms. Mila looked exhausted, her eyes flying open every few seconds, fighting sleep desperately as little whines left her mouth. 

“I’ve got her, mi amor, go relax, go take a shower,” Alexia told you, frowning as you tearfully left the room. She had to take care of Mila, first, so she could give you her full attention. 

-------

Mila had quieted slightly in the time it took you to get to the bathroom and turn the shower on, which really just made you feel worse. Was it you? Were you the reason she was so upset and refusing to sleep? The warm water washed over you, mixing with your tears, as you wished desperately that you were a better mother. More like Alexia. It was so effortless for her, so easy. Mila loved Alexia more than she loved you, you were sure. The thought only brought more tears to your eyes, until you were sobbing on the floor in the corner of the shower. 

-------

Alexia got Mila to sleep ridiculously easily. Likely, the little baby was picking up on your overwhelmed emotions, and couldn’t settle down enough to sleep. Alexia was calm, though, hadn’t spent the entire morning trying to get Mila to sleep, so obviously, she managed it in just a few minutes. 

“Sí, there you go Milabear, sleep mi bebé,” Alexia whispered, rocking back and forth on her feet, tracing lines over the baby’s small forehead. “You have to give your Mama a break, hmm?” 

Alexia normally loved to talk to Mila, though she obviously expected no response. Now, however, Alexia ached to go after you, and make sure you were okay. As soon as the baby was soundly asleep, Alexia settled her in her cot, flicked the baby monitor on, and slipped out of the room. 

You were still in the shower when your wife walked into the bedroom, hearing the water run through the door. And though she wanted to open the door and check on you, she knew better. You’d had such few moments alone recently, barely any privacy. Alexia hadn’t really either, but you definitely had it worse, and she didn’t want to overwhelm you. 

She wished she’d gone in, though, 10 minutes later when you exited the bathroom, dressed in a pair of Alexia’s shorts and a shirt that looked bigger on you than it normally did. You were still crying, just barely, but your cries picked up again when you saw Alexia waiting for you on the bed, her soft gaze meeting yours and breaking any strength you’d managed to muster up in the past few minutes.

“Oh, mi niña,” Alexia sighed, standing and opening her arms for you. You all but collapsed into them, hands fisting themselves in Alexia’s sweatshirt, clinging on for dear life. You felt so small next to her, so protected, but for once, it didn’t make you feel better. Alexia’s shampoo scent flooded your senses, and all you could think was that Mila preferred her to you, and that she always would. 

You cried, you sobbed, into your wife’s chest, much longer than Alexia thought was humanly possible, until you were wheezing in a breath after each sob, your whole body trembling against hers. You were stressed and frustrated and exhausted, but most of all, you were sad and you were terrified. Terrified, that you’d never be good enough for your perfect daughter. 

Nothing Alexia was doing seemed to work to calm you down, not her sweet words whispered in your ear, not the soothing motion of her hand on your back. You just got more and more worked up, until Alexia regretfully pulled you back a bit, taking your face in between her hands. 

“Amor, breathe,” she instructed you, nodding encouragingly when you tried to do so. It didn’t work right, your chest just spasmed and you made a choking sound, now looking up at your wife in alarm. “Hey, you are okay, mi amor, I have you,” Alexia comforted, guiding you to sit on the edge of the bed, standing just in front of you. 

“Can’t-” you gasped out, shaking your head frantically as tears continued to fall down your face. 

“You have to breathe, bebe, you are going to make yourself sick,” Alexia sighed, grabbing one of your hands and pressing it to her chest. “Inhale… venga mi niña, inhale.” She insisted, getting a little firmer in an effort to make you listen. 

You inhaled a full breath, finally, using the air instantly. “Ale,” you cried, not really sure what you were trying to convey to your wife; you just needed her. 

“I know, I know,” she whispered back. “Inhale and exhale, with me. You are safe, you are okay.” You were calming down slightly, but as you did, you grew more tearful, gasps replaced by quiet whimpers as you did everything you could to breathe with Alexia. You were desperate to feel her closer to you, for some assurance that every awful thought you were having about yourself wasn’t true. 

“Ale, please,” you mumbled, grabbing her arms and wrapping them around you. She got the message, sitting on the bed next to you and pulling you in close to her chest once again. Her shirt was slightly damp against your cheek from your tears, but Alexia held you steadily, safely. She had you, you were okay. You were okay. 

You had begun to relax, just slightly, lulled into a calmer state by the sound of Alexia’s heartbeat in your ear, when a piercing cry echoed through the house. You were brought to tears instantly again, pulling away from your wife to go grab your baby. Alexia shook her head insistently, though, gently guiding you back onto the bed. 

“No, amor, I will check on her. Try to relax, everything is okay.” She said softly. 

“Bring her here? Please?” You asked, tearfully looking up at your wife. 

Alexia looked conflicted, having just intended on putting the baby back to sleep, and returning to take care of you. You needed her, and Alexia didn’t want to divide her attention between the two most important people in her life at the moment. “I’ll just put her back down,”

“No, Ale, please, I need her here, please, I’m sorry, please just bring her,” you cried, and alexia was quick to shush you, wiping a few tears off your cheek. 

“Okay, okay. If that’s what you need, mi amor. Take some deep breaths for me, okay? I will be right back with pequeña.” 

You nodded, eyes falling shut when Alexia leaned down to kiss your forehead, before she was disappearing through the bedroom door. You tried to follow her instructions, focusing on slowing your heart rate down, hearing the cries coming from the nursery continue. 

Alexia’s voice came over the baby monitor, and you were momentarily distracted from your misery by how soft she was for her little girl. 

“My little troublemaker. Are you just jealous that your Mama is getting all the attention? I’ve got you too, bebe, don’t you worry. Let’s go find your Mama.” She cooed, Mila’s cries only quieting slightly as Alexia picked her up and carried her down the hall and into your room. 

“Hey, shh, Mama is right here.” Alexia cooed, bouncing Mila in her arms gently, giant tears sliding down the baby’s very small, very red face. Upon seeing you, Mila’s cries slowed to sniffles, and she reached out for you. Alexia kept her daughter close, though, sliding onto the bed next to you, before laying Mila easily down on her chest. “See? We are all okay.” 

You weren’t really sure what to do. Mila was calm once again, drifting off happily in her Mami’s arms. And it was ridiculous, but you wanted Alexia to hold you, too. The blonde seemed to be able to read your mind, though, shifting Mila over a bit, gently so as not to wake her up, before lifting her arm and nodding at you to scoot closer. You did, burying your face in her shoulder, clinging on tightly to her sweatshirt. 

You were so exhausted, but everytime your eyes fell shut, they would snap back open again, frantically looking to make sure Mila was okay. It was completely instinctual, you knew Alexia had her, you just couldn’t relax.  

“Rest, amor, you need to sleep. I have Mila, and I have you.” 

You let your eyes slide shut, finally, so deeply comforted by the feeling of Alexia’s fingers running through your hair. She had Mila, and she had you.

-------

When you woke, you knew a decent amount of time had passed. Your head was resting on Alexia’s thigh, now, and you realized that your wife had changed, now wearing shorts instead of the track pants she’d come home in. The room seemed slightly dimmer, and you could hear the sound of a football match on TV. You kept your eyes closed for a bit, just listening. It was the Barça men’s side playing, and Alexia was keeping up a running dialogue for Mila, as she always did. 

“Sí, and when you are a big girl, you can play football just like me. Or you can take pictures like your Mama. You can do anything you want, bebe. Anything that makes you happy.” Alexia paused, and you heard her sigh happily. You knew she was gazing down at your daughter, an expression filled with love on her face. “It would be fun if you played football though.” She whispered, as if she was telling a secret. 

You rolled off of your wife, onto your back, though you turned your head in her direction and opened your eyes. Alexia was sat up against the headboard, in a cozy pair of pajamas. Mila was tucked under her arm, sitting up too. The blonde was effortlessly holding a bottle to the baby’s mouth, her eyes flicking back and forth between her daughter and the TV across the room. Mila looked like she’d had a bath, her wispy hair a bit damp, and she was also in her pajamas, a light pink onesie with small lions on it. A gift from Mapi, of course. 

Alexia looked down at you when you rolled over, though, the smile on her face not at all hiding the concern and worry that overflowed off of her. 

“Hola mi niña perfecta,” she whispered, reaching out to run her fingers through your hair. “How are you feeling?” 

“Better. Less tired.” You croaked, clearing your throat slightly when your voice came out all choked. “What time is it?” 

“Just after 7.” You’d been asleep for upwards of 7 hours, then. “Mila has taken her bath, had another nap, and finished an important meeting with her lawyers.” Alexia said, chuckling to herself at her own joke. 

“Oh no, is she getting sued again?” You asked, looking reproachfully at your daughter. “She has to stop running people over with her car.” 

“It is a bad habit.” Alexia agreed, grinning down at you. The smile fell from her face, though, when she noticed how upset you suddenly looked. “What is it?”

“I’m so sorry for before, for freaking out. I don’t know what happened to me.” 

Alexia shook her head. “No, no apologies. You are exhausted and stressed and you spend all day at home with Milabear. A screaming baby is a lot for anyone. You were overwhelmed. It is completely understandable.” 

“You’d just got home from work though,” you argued tearfully, but Alexia shushed you. 

“Stop, amor. We are both Mila’s moms, sí? We are both responsible for her, and we are both responsible for taking care of each other. I haven’t been doing a good enough job, I see that now. You need more help, and I need to give that to you.” 

You nodded begrudgingly, biting your lip when it began to tremble. 

“Talk to me, bebe, por favor.” Alexia pleaded, running her thumb over your bottom lip. 

“It’s stupid.” You began, ignoring the frown on your wife’s face. “I’ve just missed you.” 

Alexia felt her heart shatter. “Oh, mi amor. I’ve missed you too. I haven't been around enough, and I am so, so sorry.” 

“It’s work, Ale, I get it,” 

“That is not an excuse. I already talked to my manager. I am taking a step back from brand deals and commitments. I am focusing on football, and my family. On you and my Milabear.” 

“I can’t ask you to do that, Ale,” 

“You are not asking. I am doing it. You need more from me. I don’t like to see you so upset. I am happy to do this, mi amor. I promise. You are my priority, my family is my priority. Always.” 

You nodded gratefully, but Alexia could tell by the slightly preoccupied look on your face that there was more that you were upset about. It wasn’t just being exhausted and overwhelmed. You looked insecure as you fixed your eyes on Mila, who was beginning to drift off in her spot in the crook of Ale’s arm. 

“Hey.” Alexia said softly. “Come here.” 

You sat up like she wanted you to, leaning your head on her shoulder. 

“Something else is bothering you.” She noted, pairing her words with a gentle kiss to your temple. 

“No, there isn’t,”

“Yes, there is. Tell me.” She encouraged, removing the bottle from Mila’s mouth and sitting her up on her legs. She did it so effortlessly, everything so effortlessly. Alexia was an incredible mother, and you felt like she had instincts that you just didn’t have. 

“Do you think I’m a good mother?” You asked finally, letting Mila grab onto your hand and start to play with your fingers. You felt Alexia’s eyes burning into the side of your head after you spoke, but you couldn’t bring yourself to look at her. 

“How can you ask that?” Alexia said incredulously. “You are the best mama.” 

You sighed. “Mila is perfect. 

Alexia blinked, trying to keep up with the sudden apparent subject change. “She is perfect.” 

“I don’t think I’m perfect. I don’t think I’m good enough for her. She deserves so much better than me.” 

“No, no no no.” Alexia said frantically, standing to lay the baby on the play mat next to the bed so she could turn her attention fully to you. She practically dove back onto the bed, resting against the throw pillows as she pulled you fully into her arms. “No, mi amor. You are good enough for Mila, bebe, you are perfect.”

“I just feel like I can’t do anything right. This is so much harder than I was expecting it to be.” 

“I know, cariño, I know. It is hard, but you are doing so well. I am so proud of you, and I am so sorry that I did not realize you were struggling sooner. So sorry, amor.” Alexia cooed, running her fingers through your hair. She was doing anything she could think of to bring you some comfort, to make you feel even slightly better. 

You snuggled further into your wife, trying to get as close to her as you could. “You’re better at this than I am. I think Mila loves you more.” You whispered, your cheeks burning from embarrassment, knowing you were being a bit ridiculous. 

Alexia shifted, trying to get a look at your face. She looked so devastated to hear how you were feeling, and you almost felt guilty for being honest with her. Almost, because you knew she was about to put those insecurities to rest. 

“Mi amor, no. You spend all day with her, you are around so much more than I am. It is inevitable that she will be upset around you more than she is around me, just because of the timing. And, amor, it is not like she does not cry with me. She is normally so upset when she wakes up at night, and the only way to get her back to sleep is to put her next to you. Mila lights up when she sees you, baby. She loves you so much. You brought her into this world, you are exactly what she needs. You are good enough for our baby, amor, and you are good enough for me.”

You were tearing up, but right on cue, a soft cry rang out into the room, emanating from Mila’s play mat. Your wife grabbed the baby, picking her up and bouncing her gently in her arms. Mila just cried harder, though, her face turning red as she reached her little hands out towards you. Alexia easily shifted Mila into your arms, and you cradled her to your chest, pressing kiss after kiss to her tiny forehead. Your wife pulled you both back into her arms, a soft smile on her face. 

“See? She knows you are upset, and she wants to make you feel better. Because she loves you.” Alexia murmured, resting her chin on your shoulder, shutting her eyes as she nuzzled her face into your neck. “And I love you. You are the best Mama, and the best wife, and I love you.” 

“And you, Milabear. Te amo, mi niña pequeña.” Alexia whispered, looking adoringly down at your daughter. 

You relaxed into your wife, feeling a thousand times better than before. You were happy, completely overflowing with joy and adoration for your little family. You’d never be sure what you did to deserve such perfection, but Alexia made you feel worthy of it everyday. Worthy of her love, and worthy of the most perfect baby on earth. 

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it's been a bit since i've written a mila fic. enjoy and let me know all your thoughts 🙂🥰🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

[nathaslosthershit]

A Big Question (Teen Dad!Oscar AU) Part 2

(Read part 1 of this duology first!) (Part 9 of Teen Dad!OP au) Summary: Oscar needs to mend what he broke and he needs to do it fast

Getting into the car, Honey whipped the tears from her cheeks as she made up a lame excuse as to why Oscar wasn’t with her. The driver knew that she wasn’t being truthful, but thought it best to let the girl be. Having dessert and drinks in the picnic basket that Oscar had set up for the two of them after dinner, Honey decided to not let the total night be a bust and have her own moonlight picnic on the beach while she sulked. 

Back at the restaurant, Oscar sat alone for a few minutes, digesting what had just happened before he got up and paid the bill. Walking outside, he had expected the car to still be there. Now stressed out, he got his phone to check where the car was heading, a frown appearing as he saw she was on her way to the beach, alone. 

While it wasn’t necessarily his decision to go back to racing so soon, he would be lying if he said he wasn’t thrilled that he would once again be in the car. He knew he had fucked up in the past by not prioritizing his family, but he had learned from those tough few months and wasn’t going to let it happen again. 

Deciding to let her have some time to process, Oscar ordered a car to take him home. He had expected to get back late and had told Lando to take the guest bedroom. So his friend was also not expecting him home so soon, and when Oscar came home early, alone, and clearly upset, Lando was worried.

“Mate! What happened? Where is she? Did you get to-” Lando jumped up from the couch to meet his teammate at the door.

“No, I was interrogated and let it slip about what my meeting was about and before I could say or do anything, she left the restaurant.”

“Where is she now? Do you know? She could be in trouble, it's late!”

“She took the driver and went to the beach, I assumed she wanted to be alone.” “No, you muppet! You should have absolutely followed her! Why would you let her go off alone when she is upset? She doesn’t even know the full story and you are letting her think the worst.”

Oscar hadn’t thought of that, he probably should have gotten all he wanted to say out first before leaving her alone. God, he was such an idiot to let this happen again. To his credit, Lando was being very helpful. It never dawned on Oscar that he could need relationship advice, for his relationship of 7 years, from Lando Norris himself.

“Fuck, you’re right. But I did leave her, what should I-”

“Go to her! Jesus, Oscar what are you waiting around for, this was supposed to be the perfect night and you fucked it up 45 minutes into it! Fix it now!” With that, Lando shoved his friend out the door.

Driving closer to his average speed on the track rather than the speed limit, Oscar jumped out the car the minute he saw what looked like his girlfriend’s silhouette on the sand. He had spent the short car ride thinking of what he was going to say, how he was going to fix this. The moment she looked up at him though, hiccuping from her cries, everything he had rehearsed went out the window.

Instead he got down on the sand and held her tighter than he had in a long time.

“I don’t want to end up the way we were, Oscar. We were miserable, even before the fight.” She sobbed into his neck.

“I know, sweetheart. I don’t want to end up that way either. Never, ever again.” He replied soothingly, even though he could feel his heart breaking alongside her’s.

“I just felt so alone. Watching you choose your career over me, over the kids! It was so hard to see time and time again. I am not that strong.” “Hey, you are stronger than you know possible, my love. I know I have put you through hell, getting you pregnant at 17, reacting terribly to the news, then making so many empty promises and prioritizing the wrong things. But I promise, Honey, I will never ever make those same mistakes. I meant what I said before, you are it for me. I will never love anyone the way I love you, and I will spend the rest of my life making up for my shortcomings.” He said as he cupped her cheeks, whipping away the tears. 

Seeing her smile once again, he reached into his pocket to pull out the box that had been there all night. Her eyes lit up at the realization of what it was.

“Oscar, I-”

“I know this is a terrible time, I am the reason you were sitting here, alone and crying, but this is what I had planned all along. I was, of course, going to tell you about the meeting, but after I did, I wanted to reassure you that I wasn’t going anywhere, that I would never be leaving your side for as long as I live. My career is only going to get more hectic and unpredictable as time goes on, but I am going to go through it with you all as my priorities. I am in it to win, but I am also in it to provide for you all, and I sure as hell am going to return back to you all after every race. I love you so much, Honey, ever since I saw you at that karting track, months before you had even looked at me. I know I said ‘I’d knock your socks off with this second proposal’, and I was going to! But there is nothing more important to me right now than you knowing how much you mean to me, how much the kids mean to me. So please, my love, will you marry me?” He quickly got on one knee and opened the ring box. It was the same ring as before, but he had added two tiny stones onto the band, framing the much larger diamond, on one side was his birthstone, on the other, her own. 

Trying to reply had been harder than she thought as all these new emotions of relief and unadulterated happiness caused her to, instead of answering him, sob even harder into his shoulder.

“I know this is a lot, but if its too much, if you don't want to marry m-”

“Yes! Of course I do Oscar! Oh my I- I am just so relieved and emotional I can’t-”

“Shhhh, its okay I promise.” He laughed, tears of his own starting to fall as they held each other.

Several minutes were spent recuperating until Oscar was finally able to slip the ring back onto her finger. “I hope you didn’t eat all the dessert, I was kind of hoping we could eat it together.” Oscar joked.

“Don’t worry, I didn’t touch that. The wine on the other hand-”

They sat in each other’s company well past their usual bedtime, the twins normally tiring them out enough they can’t stay up past 10. But with the engagement firing them up, they were still wide awake as they both stumbled home, deciding in their tipsy state to take the chauffeur and leave Oscar’s car there for the night. 

Lando, who had taken to the guest room hours before the happy couple got back, was relieved when he was woken up to giggles being interrupted by what was clearly a make out session. And as he heard the couple close their bedroom door, he decided it was best to put his noise canceling headphones on in order to not scar himself for life, and to let them enjoy their night without any listeners.

oscarpiastri

liked by logansargeant, mclaren, landonorris, and 938,269 others

oscarpiastri Second times the charm or whatever they say. Who cares- I am getting married!

[pinkeos]

Dad!Aventurine Headcanons

Warning/s: None and reader's gender isn't mentioned, whether the child is adopted or your own is up to you

Notes: I wish I had a dad🧍 /j

im fully convinced aventurine is a girl dad and it's hard to convince me otherwise

with his job, dad!aven couldn't spend that much time with his little girl as much as he wanted, the days where he wasn't needed to leave for different planets were far and between

and when he leaves, it takes weeks to months before he comes home despite trying his very best to finish his assignment quickly so, even though he knows it won't exactly be comparable to his presence in his daughter’s life, he sends gifts and toys. whatever she wanted, he’d give it to her

dad!aven would often call you when he's away, face timing to see and talk to you and your daughter. it'd send a pang of guilt and pain in his heart to see the frown and the tears she held back whenever he said he wouldn't be home yet

he’d be the type to rewatch the videos you’d send of you and your kid just enjoying your days whenever he misses you both, a smile on his face as he grows more determined to finish his work to come home to you

he loves his family, and treats you two as his most precious treasures, more precious than anything else in the galaxy. you’re the only ones he has left, after all. he thought his luck had ran out when you and your daughter entered his life, because he couldn't get any luckier

but whenever the man’s home, oh boy does the house get so lively

dad!aven would go along with his daughter’s wishes, doing whatever she wanted so you often had to help your husband wipe the thick make up off of his face that your daughter applied on him when they played

you remember walking in on them having a pretend tea party where they gossiped about the other ‘guests’ which were her plushies, he looked like he was enjoying it more than your daughter

they'd make bracelets together, and he'd proudly wear the bracelet his daughter made for him even though the colors didn't really look that good together or with his outfit. in his eyes, it was perfect and he'd bring it up to whoever he was talking to at work even though no one asked

dad!aven would be the type to sneak sweets for your daughter even though you told him not to because dinner was almost done, he was a victim to your daughter’s puppy eyes and pout

he once spent a day out to bond with his daughter, insisting you go and rest and have some you time while he takes care of your daughter. you later found out he took her to the casino, and the way you scolded their ears off after made him remind himself not to do it again

dad!aven was an entirely different person than the aventurine of the ten stonehearts. he was but a loving father that treasured both you and his daughter

“daddy, move! you’re heavy!” your daughter whined as she tried to push her father who was leaning against her on the couch as they waited for you to finish preparing for the day out

aventurine dramatically gasped, looking down at his daughter with a faux offended look, “do you not want my love and affection anymore?”

the child, who genuinely thought she hurt her father's feelings, stammered, “n-no!”

“‘no’?” he echoed, his acting skills quite helpful when teasing his little girl as he looked away, sniffing as if he was actually crying

“i-i mean!” she stood on the couch, wrapping her short arms around his shoulders, “i still want daddy’s hugs! even when im older! i don't want you to leave again!”

his teasing might've gotten a bit too far when she began to sob, aventurine internally panicked as he embraced her, rubbing her back, “hey now, daddy was just teasing.”

“why is our little girl crying, kakavasha?”

the moment he heard your voice, he knew he was done for

[xprakzif]

LOVE YOU GOODBYE,

matt x fem!reader

summary: when matt’s career gets in the way of his relationship, his girlfriend simply cannot take it anymore. what better way to say goodbye than this?

warnings:: MDNI//SMUT, car sex, overstimulation, raw intercourse, kissing, angst, no happy ending.

“just one more time?”

the chilly breeze of the night rushed in causing both bodies to shiver. her short mini dress with lack of sleeves or a jacket only worsened the setting. the hair around her shoulders wasn’t doing her any favors by warming her up.

her tear stained cheeks illuminated by the street lamps occasionally flickering with him standing in front of her. so majestic yet full of shit, how could he stand there so beautifully after breaking her heart?

“face it, matt. i understand this is your job, i get that and i know you have to do this. you have to go hang out with other girls, you have to film and stream all the time, i know! but even when there’s time you don’t bother..” her heart pounding against her chest feeling like she was slowly sinking. she didn’t mean to come off this way. but it gets tiring after a while.

“i don’t know what you want me to do..” he didn’t even look her way, still looking out into the crowd of bodies that filled his shared home.

“yet you throw a party? shit, this is the closest thing i get to-“

“it wasn’t even my idea, y/n! you swear you get me but you don’t, ‘cause if you did, you’d know i don’t even want any of this! it was chris’s idea to invite some people over—shit, it’s not even a party for real. you always do this.. i’m just as tired as you are, alright?” his sudden outburst snapped a few heart strings, she felt herself breaking down quicker by the second.

the booming voices made her racing heart only beat faster. maybe she’s the problem. maybe her leaving would solve his worries, cut back the stress he’s dealing with.

“okay..” she whispered, face heating up as her eyes burned with tears. she continuously swallowed the nerves in her throat but nothing could stop the pain in her heart right now.

she moved through the room trying to find an escape, an exit. haven’t even noticed she let loose and sobbed, ruining her eye makeup.

finally reaching the front door, she stepped out trying to slam the door behind her, but something was in the way.

“cmon, y/n..” matt took ahold of her arm, which she ripped out of his grip to walk off.

from an outsiders point of view, it’d look like he was chasing her. her heels clicking against the cement as she made her way to her car parked a bit far from their house.

“please- wait!”

getting to her car, she finally spun around,

“no, matt! i’m done- with you, with us.. i’m sorry.” she managed to get out. he took in her figure underneath the glooming street lamp. it looked like a scene from a movie.

“what..?”

“i’m sorry.. i don’t wanna be in the way of your career anymore–please don’t convince me otherwise..”

he stood shut, a part of him knew she was right.

he felt his heart tense up as if it were being squeezed. thought they were both going through such heartbreak, neither of them could help but admire the other.

after all, she was his–or atleast used to be. it wasn’t unlikely for him to lust over her, now just wasn’t the right time.

both of them couldn’t deny how sexually frustrated they were. she was right, matt hadn’t spent enough time with her. neither of them were disloyal, so the days added on and on.

he couldn’t help but realize her beauty, even with eyeliner and mascara running down her stained cheeks. if anything it only made her more exquisite.

him standing there, dark purple bags under his eyes from the lack of rest he had gotten these past weeks, his bright blue eyes looking up and down her body. she felt the need as much as he did.

his slow steps toward her made her head spin. he placed a delicate hand to her cheek, caressing it while he looked into her eyes.

“just.. one more time?” he whispered. “as a goodbye..”

there was no need for context when they both knew what that meant. she grabbed the back of his neck, drawing him closer to smash his lips onto hers.

the world around them paused, no care for the party that was going on just a few houses away.

struggling by reaching in her purse, she searched with her hand for her car key unlocking it in the process. the lights flashing for a second took matt’s attention to pull open the backseat door; pushing their bodies onto the cushioning of the seats.

she laid on her back, matt crawling on top of her after closing the door. it was such a cramp space but neither seemed to care too much.

he reconnected their lips to move in synchrony, their hands roaming each others body.

“matt-” she whispered breathlessly, tugging at his hair.

his touch grazed over the thin fabric of her mini dress, trailing down to grip onto her hips. the opposite hand pulling up the material over her waist, revealing her lacey panties.

her hands began unbuckling his belt and undoing his baggy jeans. somehow, he’d shifted them so she was now straddling his lap.

he trailed his hands down to her hips, once again holding onto them while they moved with rhythm, grinding onto his crotch.

“fuckkk– y/n..” he dragged out.

the car filled with heavy breathing and the smacking sound of lips, causing the windows to fog. matt was sat up, back against he car door. she felt the stiffness in his pants through her panties that were damp and sticky.

breaking the kiss, she reached down to tug the fabric down her legs; it was difficult in such an awkward position, but her eagerness made it happen.

he watched her with gleaming eyes as if she were a display of art in a museum. pulling down his jeans, including his boxers, he freed his hardened cock that sprung up.

she aligned her entrance with his length, sinking down slowly; she gasped. he sucked in air between his teeth, seething at the feeling of her tightness gripping around him.

she was swallowing him whole as her hips dove lower to collect him fully into her.

“keep going— that’s it-ahh, take it all..” he groaned and she was fully sat with him deep inside her.

she began rolling her hips forward, reconnecting their lips in the process. the kiss was sloppy. her mouth opening constantly to let out breathless moans from bouncing on his cock.

it sounded like they just ran a marathon with the amount of heavy breathing. he tried his best to buck his hips upward to feel her deeper inside.

“fuck!–so deep—nngh- need to–”

he took everything in his power to thrust deeper and harder with a quickened pace to bring her closer.

she threw her head back with pleasure, clenching around his base as her orgasm washed over her.

“matt–ma– ah–“ she stammered out while she stiffened up with trembling thighs, digging her nails into his shoulders.

he wasn’t far behind her. groaning while slamming up into her, she was caught in a trance by the overstimulation.

“ohmy– nngh—fuckkk, i love y-you–i lov–” he echoed into the car, shooting white ropes of his seed into her painting her slimy walls.

there was a ring of a bubbly, white substance around his cock, a mix of both of there liquids.

they panted trying to come down from their highs. she felt a pang in her chest; the sudden realization hit and hit hard.

this was it. the last dance.

she started to remove her self from him,

“wai-wait. don’t leave yet.” he helped her off, “it’s late, y/n. just stay the night, please.”

she thought for a minute. he was right, though they weren’t aware of the current time, it was late. she thought about the dangers of driving so late on a friday night,

“alright.. fine”

after fixing themselves up, they found their way back to the house. the ‘get together’ the boys were hosting had already died down. no one noticed them slip into matt’s room.

“here,” he handed her one of his larger shirts, "wouldn’t want you sleeping in that..”

“thanks..” she accepted the offer, still feeling hurt with the tension from someone she was once so comfortable with.

she changed, slipped under the covers, and took a deep breath.

he got in right behind her, they were faced away from eachother, she thought.

“y/n?” he whispered, clear enough for her to hear.

“hmm?”

“i love you..” he watched her body expanded with every breath she took. he was facing her the entire time.

“i-i love you too..” she whispered, her voice steady but her eyes brimmed with tears.

the night fell silent. both bodies drifting to sleep after losing energy from their previous actions.

it came morning time quickly, matt shifted in his spot as the sunlight peeked through the curtains.

he recalled being with her last night, joy awakening him. he rolled over to the other empty side of the bed.

empty? this can’t be right, she was here..

he felt like he remembered a bad dream from last night. quickly grabbing his phone to call his girlfriend.

the line rang once.

“you have reached the voicemail box of—“ rang too loud in matt’s ears, he quickly shut it off. his heart began to race.

baby? •!Not Delivered

his mind soon flooded with the memories they shared, then it got to last night.

that wasn’t a dream after all.

[zygomantic]

Nanami comforting a sad/depressed fem reader after he comes home from work. (Had a horrible day/week and need any kind of comfort)

A/n: Honestly same. Always happy to provide comfort, thank you for your request! This is very short but it is what it is. Also, reader could be considered gender neutral.

You're not alone.

Synopsis: Your husband Nanami comes home from work and finds you crying on the couch. He helps you through it.

Content Warnings: Mentioned Depression, negative thoughts

You blankly stared at the TV, which by now had been running for multiple hours. You'd spent your hours flicking through channels and streaming services, hoping to find anything interesting to pass the time until your husband came home.

Your frustration grew the longer you searched. Why did this have to be so complicated? Fuck, it just added to the pile shit that didn't work like you wanted to. Your job was stressing you out and you knew the next months weren't going to be any more relaxed. Nanami was just as busy, mission after mission keeping him away from home. You missed him but didn't fault him for doing his job.

Since this morning you were feeling down, and though you'd struggled with depression in the past, it usually didn't creep up this fast or suddenly. You knew very well that you were still recovering and that recovery wasn't a linear process, but a small part of you felt disappointed in yourself for feeling like this again.

Or maybe you felt comfortable like this. It was so easy, so familiar. If you were really on the way back to depression, you didn't think you had any strength left to pull you out of it again and forcing Nanami to help you made you feel selfish. It wasn't his problem that your mind was broken and your thoughts shitty.

It was all too much and your nose started burning, then your eyes watered and you didn't bother stopping the tears as they escaped. A headache had begun to form in the back of your head and you just sobbed harder.

By the time a key turned in the front door lock your face was soaked with tears and your eyes were red and puffy. You must've looked horrible, because Nanami's eyes furrowed as he walked into the room and saw you. You hadn't even hear him call out your name when he entered, too absorbed in your thoughts.

Nanami didn't bother hanging up his jacket, just dropped it to the floor and immediately made his way over to you. His hand was on your back, rubbing soothing circles into it as he tried to figure out what was wrong. First, however, he needed you to breathe.

"Darling, can you hear me?" His voice must've registered somewhere in your mind because you nodded, despite having already forgotten what he asked. "Good," he said, continuing his comforting. "I need you to breathe, dear. You remember the box breathing, right?" Another nod. "Alright. Now breathe in for four," he instructed and you tried to follow, not counting the seconds but still trying. "Hold for four," you did, "and exhale for four. Now pause for four."

It became easier after the first minute and Nanami walked you through every second of it. Once you'd gotten your breathing back under control, new tears threatened to escape at the though of how much of a burden you were. Always making him take care of you like you're a child or baby, how embarrassing.

"Don't." You looked up at your husband in confusion. "I can tell when you're thinking poorly of yourself. Don't do that. Please."

Your voice was quiet as you answered. "Okay." You pulled your legs up under the blanked and curled up into a ball.

Nanami's hand was still rubbing your back. "Can you tell me what caused this? What's going on? "

"I'm sorry. Sorry." Tears streaked down your face and Nanami's warm, big hand swiped them away carefully.

"There's nothing to be sorry for. We all have our off days. I'm sorry yours had to be today." His voice was so deep, so comforting, almost like a light to cling to while the rest of the world was trying to drown you.

"Work's just been..." You trailed off, not really wanting to think about all the things you had to do and the insane amount of paperwork that had to filed until the end of the not to mention the coworker that-

"Stressful?" His voice ripped you out of your thoughts again. "I get what that's like. Is there anything I can do to help?"

"I- just don't leave. Please. I don't want to go back to feeling like I did months ago. I can't- I-" Your throat closed up just speaking about theast time your depression hit you hard.

"I'm not letting you do this alone. I promise." His hand pulled you into his body for a hug and you melted into him. "I'm here for you. Always."

"Thank you." He almost didn't hear you, you were so quiet. "Thank you so much."