#but i know if i have an appointment i show up that's how my brain works
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Pumpkin
Pairing: Nanami Kento x fem!reader
Synopsis: Husband!nanami (later father!Nanami) being super domestic during your pregnancy, birth, and arrival of your baby.
CW: a smidge 🤏🏻 of angst but mainly FLUFF, pet names, established relationship, pregnancy, birth, babies WC: 1.9k A/N: this is a sequel to Vitamins but can be read as a standalone if the smut in Vitamins is not your jam. Enjoy this fluffy goodness 🥹
Ever since those two tests had very loudly informed you of your pregnancy, Nanami had not let you lift a single finger to do anything. Not that he had even before your pregnancy — your husband’s love language was acts of service — but now? He was very hyperactive in taking care of you.
“Honey, did you note down the appointment time in the calendar?”
“Honey, did you take your folic acid?”
“Honey, you’ve been on your feet too much today. You need to rest.”
“Honey, do you want me to give you a massage?”
“Kento,” you sigh, “I’m fine, really. It’s still early stages.”
“And you have to be careful during the early stages,” he notes.
“I know. But you’re also treating me like I’m china and…it’s just…a bit too much,” you say. You didn’t want to tell him this, because you knew he meant well, but you also had to communicate your feelings to him. You were worried he’d be upset when you did, but he looks at you apologetically, seemingly taking it in his stride.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I don’t mean to make you feel…suffocated. I was worried I was being too overbearing, but I wanted to make sure you knew that I want to do as much as I can for you. And the baby,” he explains in one breath. Your eyes soften and you step into his embrace, hugging him tightly, burying your face into his neck.
“I do. I’ve always known that. I appreciate everything you’re doing for me, but I would also like to do things myself sometimes.”
“I understand. I’ll be more mindful, my love,” he rubs his hand up and down your back.
“Thank you, Ken. I love you,” you kiss his cheek and he turns his face to capture your lips with his in a chaste kiss.
Every week, you’d made it tradition to take a side profile picture of the bump along with the fruit that the baby was the size of. This was Nanami’s idea, of course, and he made it creative and fun. Seeing him be so excited for the arrival of your child made your heart swell with joy.
He’d very proudly started to create a scrapbook of all the happenings during your pregnancy which he was eager to show your child when they got older.
Interestingly, Nanami did not want to do a gender reveal when the ultrasound technician offered to write it down at one of the scans. And you couldn’t fault his logic when he later explained, “It’s silly. It’s a social construct. We’ll find out when they’re born, and regardless, even then it won’t matter. We’ll still love them the same.”
Every craving, every need, he provided. Including the need to jump his bones in the second trimester. Damn, did he keep up with you. You knew it was because he found the cute little swell of your belly so incredibly sexy — he’d voiced it on numerous occasions — knowing he’d done that, nothing made him more unhinged.
Ever the doting husband and expectant father, he’d started reading up more about babies and often tell you facts you’d have never known. “Did you know that your heart grows bigger during pregnancy?” He informs you while you’re laid back on the couch, on opposite ends, 5 months in.
“I…did not know that,” you blink, surprised.
“Yep. It’s to help the heart pump more blood to the baby. Babies can also cry in the womb.”
“Oh no,” you pout, “I don’t want baby to cry.”
“I wouldn’t worry too much about that, hon, they’ve been quite gentle so far. You can sing to them, they’ll hear it by now. And talking to them in another language is also beneficial,” he notes and you let out a soft laugh at how he’s rattling off these fun facts.
“Your brain truly amazes me sometimes, Ken, it’s like a sponge,” you prop your arm up and rest your chin on your hand.
“So’s the baby’s right now. We should get a Duolingo subscription and get them started on another language already,” he jokes and you let out a hearty laugh, which earns you a little kick in protest from your baby.
“Well, your child just said no to that,” you giggle.
His mouth falls open and he scoots over and lies between your legs, coming face to face with your bump. “Listen here, you little squirt, you will learn another language whether you like it or not.”
“Oh, daddy’s setting rules,” you whisper.
“And in addition to that language, which you will be fluent in, you’ll also learn jujutsu,” Kento tells your bump definitively. You laugh at how he’s instructing the baby firmly one minute and then lovingly pressing kisses to your skin the next.
He relaxes against you, and you decide to tell him a fact you’d found out recently. “Did you know that eggs can pick and choose whether the sperm gets to fertilise it? For a while, I thought it was just a race of the best sperm to get to the egg. But the egg can reject it if it wants to. Isn’t that fascinating?”
He raises an eyebrow in slight surprise and amusement at this newfound knowledge. He wasn’t aware of that little detail either, but he finds it very intriguing. “That’s pretty impressive. I had no idea that they had such power over which sperm gets to fertilise them. Who knew eggs were such shrewd gatekeepers?”
“Right? But my egg was a terrible gatekeeper. Probably a combination of that and your sperm just being overachievers.”
He laughs heartily at your comment, the image of his overly ambitious sperm and your easy-going egg combining to form your miracle is quite the amusing picture.
“Well, I do have some pretty strong swimmers, I can’t deny that. And your egg must have had a weak moment, letting my little overachievers through. But I'm glad it did,” he smiles warmly at you, his hand gently rubbing your leg.
There were moments where you couldn’t wait to meet the little one, but you also found yourself getting emotional a few times that it wouldn’t just be you and him anymore. When he notices your glassy eyes one day while you’re eating breakfast, he frowns and takes your hand in his. “What’s wrong, sweetheart?”
The dam suddenly bursts — darned pregnancy hormones — and you start to bawl, managing to say between breaths, “It’s— not— going to— be just— you and me any— anymore…”
He has to stop himself from laughing at your sudden realisation and he circles around the dining table, embracing you.
“And I know how stupid I sound right now, because I wanted this, and still do, but I’m— I’m just…scared,” you cry, inhaling shaky breaths. “What if I’m not a good mother? What if parenthood is the complete opposite of what I envision it to be?” You ramble.
He rubs your back gently and comforts you, kissing the crown of your head as you rest it on his chest. “I know, honey. You don’t sound stupid. It’s natural to feel nervous. Parenthood is a new venture for both of us but it won’t be vastly different to what we think it’ll be. And you’ll be a fantastic mother. I’ll be by your side every step of the way, you’ll never be alone. We’re doing this together. We’ll make mistakes together. Clean up messes together. Strive together. It’ll be alright.”
His words of reassurance bring you a sense of calm and you feel the warmth of comfort spread through you slowly, easing your anxieties.
He reassured you every time you felt any sense of worry or sadness, provided the love that you needed and more, and was a real anchor to harbouring your emotions.
Week 40 arrived before you knew it. With a bright and large orange pumpkin in hand, you took what you hoped would be the last picture for the scrapbook. You both subsequently started referring to the baby as “pumpkin” that week. Every day that week, he had tried to coax them out with sweet words.
“Are you gonna come out today, pumpkin? Today’s a good day to join us, I think. The weather’s nice out. You should come see it,” he whispered to your bump in the morning before you were awake.
When your baby decided that they were ready to come out, Nanami was there, holding your hand the entire time, not once letting go. You were quite afraid of this final hurdle but with Nanami by your side, you knew you’d be okay.
It was a long and tiring 14 hours, exhaustion was settled into your bones, but when you finally, finally give the final push and the baby is out, you cry. From the relief of birth being over, from the new chapter that had just opened, from having sight of the baby that you and Nanami had made.
Nanami kisses your head, eyes glassy as he whispers praises of how well you did, that it’s over and that he’s so proud of you.
The midwife places pumpkin onto your chest for some skin to skin, placing a blanket on top, the little thing curled up and looking disapproving of being pushed out of the coziness of your womb.
Nanami chuckles softly as he peers over and the baby’s rosy lips tremble before they take their first breath and start to cry quietly. You sniffle as you wipe your own tears and look at your husband and he kisses your forehead.
You hush the baby gently, speaking softly, “You’re here, pumpkin…here with us. I’ve got you.”
After they cut the umbilical cord, the afterbirth comes out, and the midwives take the baby to bathe, clothe, take measurements, and bundle them up.
“How do you feel?” Kento asks, holding your hand still as you stand up, ready to take a shower.
“I feel a little empty inside, it also hurts. Not looking forward to peeing,” you sigh and he caresses your back gently.
“You’ll get better with time, honey,” he guides you to the shower room.
There, he tends to all of your needs, helping you wash up, then dry off, and put your clothes on. You could almost cry from his attentiveness.
You hug him and squeeze gently, gazing up at him gratefully and lovingly. “What did I do to deserve you?” You whisper.
He smiles sweetly, caressing your cheek and giving you a chaste peck. “You can’t say that after you just pushed our baby out,” he chuckles. You laugh softly and you hold each other for a moment longer, before you both go back into the room.
There, the midwives wheel the bassinet over to you, where pumpkin is awake and looking for something to come into focus.
“She’s very healthy, Mr. and Mrs. Nanami.”
“She?” You repeat, feeling your heart flutter. A sweet little girl.
Nanami smiles to himself, he’s elated. He has a daughter. “Sweetheart, come on, look at her lips, they’re totally yours.”
You give him a small smile, eyes filling with happy tears as you both fawn over your daughter. It was a little early to tell, but you hope she has his eyes. She had a bunch of blonde hair, too.
“Hold her, Ken,” you whisper and he obliges, gently picking her up and angling his arms perfectly to fit his little angel against him.
He’s quiet for a minute, just soaking up the feeling of having his daughter in his arms, the warmth of her, her existence setting in.
“Now, about those language lessons that you refused to do…” he speaks to her in a gentle tone, and your lips curl into a bigger smile at his jokes, “I don’t want to hear another word from you, little miss. Any objections?”
He’s quiet for a beat and the baby just pouts as she looks up at her father, which you laugh softly at. “Good choice. Maybe start to brush up on some Malay, sweet pea, your mama and I will be taking you to Malaysia one day soon,” he promises to her you feel your heart flutter in your chest at the thought.
The three of you, your little family, in your shared happy place. Something out of a dream, but soon would be reality.
You couldn’t wait.
Do not copy or translate my work. © ashasdiary, all rights reserved. Divider by cafekitsune
#let's pretend the divider is a pumpkin just bc#*cries* PAPAMIN!!!#listen i am pmsing and i am genuinely in tears at the thought of him being a dad because he would be so GENTLE#nanami kento#nanami kento x reader#nanami kento fluff#nanami fluff#nanami x reader#jjk fluff#jjk fanfic#jjk x reader#jjk nanami#kento nanami#jjk kento#kento x reader#jujutsu kaisen nanami#papamin
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What's Mine
Summary: Bucky pushes you too far and decides to explain how your situation works. Or doesn't.
Word Count: ~2.3 k
Warnings: Dark Fic, Implied dub/non con, Power imbalance. Please let me know if I missed any.
Previous Part
It's been a few months since Bucky "claimed" you. He followed up on his promises of taking care of you. You frequently woke up to some surprise gift or another. One day it was a fully stocked kitchen. Another day it was the leak in the bathroom sink getting fixed. More than a few times it's been jewelry with his initials on it.
And all it cost was letting him use you. You swear a piece of your soul dies every time he makes you cum. Every time he coats you in his semen. Every time you match his fervor. It might not be so bad if he didn't gloat every time. That damn smirk haunted your dreams. Or was it nightmares? What was the difference anymore?
It had definitely affected your standing in the community. People were scared to interact with you. Fewer parents brought their kids to the library when you were there. Ruth and her friends had no problems calling you all sorts of degrading things under their breath. You definitely caught them giving you the evil eye more than a few times.
Part of you suspected that if you'd quit trying to fight him he'd lose interest. He liked when you were in a fiery mood. If you could just give in, give up, he'd likely stop using you. But you couldn't help yourself. You hated him. You hated yourself for enjoying the pleasure he gave. That hate needed an outlet.
You pull into your driveway, no longer surprised to see Bucky's bike there as well. You sigh, wondering if you can talk him into to leaving. You're exhausted. Walking into the house you don't even have a chance to take your jacket off before Bucky is on you.
"Bucky, please no. I'm just too tired."
He chuckles, "don't worry. I'm just really happy to see you. We're going out tonight."
You sigh, "I'd rather stay in."
"Then that means you have the energy for me all night."
"Ugh, fine. Where are we going?"
"I've got you an appointment at the tattoo parlor."
"WHAT?! I hate tattoos! I can't get any!"
He smiles as he growls at you, "you're going to get a tattoo just for me. No one else is going to be able to see it, but we'll know it's there."
"Isn't the jewelry enough of your 'ownership'? You even got me a brooch for my cardigans with your initials!"
Bucky licks his lips, "it was just the beginning, Doll. So far everything I've done to mark you are things that can wash away or heal up. This is the next step."
"I refuse," you declare, crossing your arms.
"Fuck, Doll, you're getting me riled up." He puts his arms on each side of your head, boxing you in against the wall. "And you're getting that damn tattoo. We can either go now, while you're still cleaned up, or after I've fucked your brains out and you're a cum covered mess."
"Fine," you drop your head. "Let's go to the tattoo parlor."
"Not yet." He grabs you chin and makes your look at him. "You need to thank me, first, Doll."
Bile rises at the back of your throat. "Thank you for letting me preserve my dignity."
He laughs. "Give me another," he taunts, using the same voice as when he's telling you to give him another orgasm. You hate yourself for the involuntarily clench your pussy does.
"Thank you, Bucky, for...for introducing me to Bunny. It is nice to have a friend." A friend who understands how fucked you both are, you think.
That gets a more sincere smile on his face. "It is important to me that you know my best friend and his girl. I'm glad you're good to them. Bunny is gonna need you when she's pregnant."
"What are friends for," you dryly reply.
"That's my good girl, Doll."
The tattoo is pretty much what you expected. His initials, right over your heart. If you wore anything low cut, it would be obvious. You were sure that was the point: can't even show a hint of skin without reminding everyone who it actually belongs to. At least it wouldn't be a problem at work, given you always dress conservatively.
By the time you're home Bucky is practically salivating at the memory of the tattoo on your chest. He might be eager to see this permanent mark of his claim on you but at least he's willing to follow instructions for proper care so it doesn't scar or make you sick. You made sure to thank him for that, knowing he likes to hear it, and he reiterates, "I take care of what's mine."
"Any chance I can just get some sleep tonight? I wasn't lying when I said I was tired."
"I'm all worked up, Doll."
"I thought you take care of what's yours," you snap back. "How is keeping me awake, not letting get good sleep, taking care of me?"
He grips your chin and gives you a thoughtful look. "I suppose you're right," he admits. "Even a vibrator's batteries gotta recharge every so often, right?" You roll your eyes and he grins. "But I'm going to hold you all night and when you wake up, it's on. I know you don't work tomorrow."
"Is that why you helped with my budget? So I'd have more free time to be your personal toy?" You can't fight the fire in your voice. You're tired, yes. Tired of being so angry all the time.
"Aww, you admit you're mine," he teases.
Unable to hold back any longer you smack his face. "I have never been so angry or tired as I have been since you showed up. You want to take care of me? You want me to be yours? Treat me like a fucking person!" Tears are pouring out of your eyes, the stress and frustration of the months finally finding a kind of release.
Bucky glowers at you and grabs your throat with his metal arm. "You shouldn't have done that, Doll."
"I don't care anymore," you croak.
That seems to catch him off guard as his hand loosens and his face softens.
"Oh, Doll," he shakes his head. "You really should've said something sooner." You squeeze your eyes shut as more tears start falling. He removes his hand from your throat and brings you in for a hug, causing you to cry even more. He pats your hair and coos, "there, there," until you can't cry any more.
"Let's get you to bed," he says quietly.
"I...I don't...I don't understand."
He gently lifts your chin, "you know, before Bunny ran, I tried to warn Steve he was being too controlling. That she was going to bolt. He didn't listen and, sure enough, she escaped. Wouldn't surprise me if she continued to try because he hasn't learned to loosen his grip. I don't plan on repeating his mistakes. Yes, you're mine and you'll never be rid of me. But that doesn't mean I can't be benevolent."
You sniffle as your brain tries to comprehend the sudden change in his demeanor.
"Now lets make sure that tattoo is properly cared for," he says with a soft kiss to your forehead.
"I...I hit you," you stammer.
"You're over-stressed and tired," he shrugs. "If I thought you were doing it just because you wanted to hurt me, yes, there would be repercussions. But I've apparently been overworking my poor Doll, so I'll forgive that one smack." His tone at that last part implies any more attempts to lash out at him will be punished.
"Thank you, Bucky," you murmur as you hang your head.
"Mmmm. That's more like it. Now let's get you to bed and tomorrow we'll work on your communication skills."
You wake up feeling like you're hungover without having had any alcohol. The delicious smells of breakfast lure you out of the bed, even though you dread meeting the cook.
Bucky's shirtless and smiling as he works. If you were in anything close to a healthy relationship you'd smile at how happy he is. Instead you keep your head down, trying not to think about that metal hand wrapped around your neck. About how those muscles feel pressed against your back, or on top of you.
He sees you and gestures for you to sit at the table. He brings you a plate of breakfast, a mug of coffee and kisses the top of your head before sitting across from you. You don't eat right away like he does, lost in your confusion about this change in behavior.
"Eat, Doll," he orders. "I didn't stock your kitchen and cook this up just for you to let it go cold."
"What is going on?" your voice is barely above a whisper.
"I'm taking care of my girl," he answers, nonchalantly. You look at him like you've never seen him before and he sighs. "Eat, or I will force it down your throat."
You grab a slice of the toast and start chewing. "Thank you, Bucky," you grumble and he nods in his approval.
"One of the differences between me and Cap is that I know I'm a monster," he tells you between bites. "He likes to think we've done all of this to keep his girl safe and give her the life she always wanted. I know better. But we've been best friends since we were kids. Ride or die, you know? So I'm always going to have his back. I've just made peace with the fact that it means ruining lives."
"You never tried to talk him out of it? Out of taking over an entire town?"
He shakes his head. "Steve's the kind of guy who can never be talked or distracted from his goal. One of the things I find endearing about him."
"So, he gets you all to take over everything here and you, what? Enjoy the spoils?" Feeling the bile rise at the back of your throat, you go for another slice of toast to try to settle your stomach while keeping Bucky happy.
"It's a balance," he grins. "We take over and just start doing whatever the hell we want, a lot of people are going to die trying to get rid of us. So we set up some rules for our men. People will remain upset, of course, but they're less likely to 'rise up' so long as we have a level of restraint. It's, honestly, the biggest part of my job as Cap's second."
You think on this for a minute, mindlessly eating. "I get why the town, but why me?"
He shrugs, "I needed the stress relief. It ain't easy keeping a crew in line and I was initially just hoping for a quiet spot to read to calm down. Then I started watching you. Saw you expertly handle all kinds of difficulties. When you snapped at me, I figured, like me, you could use some stress relief."
"Stress relief?!" He gives you a look that has you clamming up.
"And fuck you were so good," he muses. "That first photo is still the background on my phone." Heat rushes to your face. "I decided to go ahead and keep you as mine. You're not only a good fuck, but you were quick to befriend Bunny. Everyone else who sees her with Cap has decided to avoid her. Something I know you've been experiencing, even though you haven't told me." You look down, unable to say anything. "I honestly thought you liked the rough treatment and was happy to give it, but I'm guessing we hit a limit for you."
"You branded me," you snarl.
"No, I got you a tattoo. Branding is something else and would've hurt you a lot more." His tone is stern and you return your attention to your food. "You've played a critical role in helping me keep things under control. Plus, since you're my girl, you get some privileges and protections. You think Steve would've beaten up Walker for some random librarian? No. But for his best friend's girl? That's another story."
"So, you're just going to keep using me?"
"Yes," he nods. "And now that I know more about your limits, I'm less likely to get stabbed in my sleep."
You look at him, aghast, "that's why you never stayed the night before?"
Bucky chuckles, "so smart. I love it. And now that you have more information, hopefully you're smart enough to put the rest of the pieces together."
"If I hurt you, Steve drops everything to find and kill me. Probably painfully." He nods. "If I make you angry, you're likely to take it out on someone who doesn't deserve it or you lose control of your men for long enough that they hurt someone who doesn't deserve it." He nods again, smiling at you. "And if I stop playing along like everything is okay, it's another sign to the townsfolk that might set them over the edge and have them shooting, getting hurt, or worse."
Bucky finishes his breakfast, nodding at your conclusions. "God, I love that you're so smart. Makes a lot of this so much easier." You start sniffling and he reaches across the table to gently grip your chin. "I get that this is a lot to take in, Doll. But I know you'll make the right decision. If you really didn't care about this town, you'd have left when you only had a skeleton budget. You're willing to work yourself to the bone to take care of these people, you're willing to be mine to keep them safe."
"I can't say 'no'," you whimper.
"But it doesn't have to be all bad. Remember, I take care of what's mine."
Previous Part
Tagging: @alicedopey; @delicatebarness; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @lokislady82; @ronearoundblindly
#biker!bucky barnes x librarian!reader#dark!bucky barnes#biker!bucky barnes x female!reader#bucky barnes x female!reader#bucky barnes x librarian!reader#dark!bucky barnes x librarian!reader
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Not being a woman who worried about modesty, you greeted the curtain guy at your door wearing your baby doll, nylons and heels. You invited him in and noticed how small he was; he was shorter than you. He had longish hair that was well-cared for. And as he climbed his ladder to check the cornices, you noticed his shapely buns and thought those buns are being wasted in baggy trousers, they belong in tight leggings and stylish heels. When he was through taking measurements he sat down across from you and explained his suggestions for your curtains. You played with him and rejected each of his suggestions and he accepted every change you wanted no matter how outlandish it was. Hmmm, a real submissive.
You suggested a glass of wine as you talked and he agreed. In the kitchen you laced it with your potion that would put him out and make him more pliable. When you sat down and gave him his wine he drank it. You noticed how as he talked he spoke with his hands and pulled his hair back out of his face like a young woman. Danny was such a perfect subject to add ro your stable of young feminine submissives and you were the domme to make it happen.
Soon he stopped talking and just stared ahead. You got up, took there wine glass out of his hands, led him to your dungeon, laid him on your exam table, and stripped him. . He had little body hair, but a little Nair all over removed that. You put your smallest cage on his tiny cock. You put a set of headphones ion him and a Meta occular. As his brain was being reprogrammed to think like a feminine little girl, you gave him the first of his fast acting hormone injections and attached the IV in his hand that would feed him more hormones and special chemicals that would alter his bone structure.
You easily flipped him over, readjusted his position, slipped a bolster under his tummy which meant his head was down, and he was on all fours with his ass up. You adjusted your fucking machine started it up and his ass was getting trained for fucking. You left him there for a couple of hours, until the programs finished. You turned off the machine laid him on his back, easily, b/c he must have only weighed 100 pounds or less. You thought with the chemicals you were giving him, he would be even less. While he was still under, you numbed his neck and surgically altered his vocal cords.
Finally you took out his IV, dressed him in a shorty, rayon pink babydoll and chemically woke him. He rose up, stretched and said "Good morning Mommy." in her high lilting voice. You said: "Good morning Danielle, time to go to your remodeled bedroom, put your makeup on and get dressed. We have an appointment today to get our hair and nails done." "Oh mommy I like going to the salon to get all pretty. The ladies there make me feel sooo feminine. I'm glad I'm a girl. But mommy my butt hurts." Well sweet cheeks don't fret over it. A girl like you needs to have her butt well-trained to take a boy's cock in it; you'll get used to it. And your cousin Mike is going to be coming over tomorrow and I know after you flirt with him he's going to want to fuck your ass." "Mmmmm I like Mike", Danielle said:. "he's good kisser and a real hunk." As she took off her baby doll she said: "Mommy do you think I have good looking ass?" "Oh baby girl, even at this young age your ass is sticking out nicely." As she watched Danielle admiring her backside, she looked at her chest and saw she had nicely growing boobies with big areolas surrounding her nips. She thought this little bitch is going to have a nice big rack of DD's. "Okay enough talk. Put on your makeup like I've showed you and then you can pick out what short dress you want to wear. "Oh mommy, I already know what I want to wear: my boots, fishnets, short flouncy skirt that shows off my ass, and low cut bare midriff top, Her mommy thought, oh this is going to be good raising this child. She's a llittle wanton slut already.
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22 isn't very much at all, I think.
#5am rambles#anyways ignore this as per usual im just thinking in a post that i'll delete soon. i just worry and writing it helps.#you ever wonder when you'll “grow up'? and then realize youre not even fully grown?#that theres still more to learn in life and that the mistakes you make are just that? mistakes?#that you are still so very very young in a world that is so very very old?#im almost 23. barely a quarter of my lifespan. im still a child in a way- my brain not fully formed.#you ever wonder how many mistakes you can make before you figure something out?#I dont know much of anything really. that's the sad part. and the adults who were supposed to help me learn... didnt.#i was failed. and now im a failure. at almost not quite 23 years old. Maybe i wont be a failure in another few years.#i still have a while to go before I die. I'm not going to waste time thinking about it. im just going to try my best.#I have time. I can learn. Grace and patience are not endless but damn if i dont try to figure things out#first step though is meds and therapy tho. we're done with the pity party. some things you just have to accept are okay#cuz my whole life i was taught that being emotional is a weakness. its pathetic and stupid to be upset or angry about anything.#any time i wanted to show i was upset or angry i was 'wrong'. i was 'selfish' and 'dramatic'#so i suppressed and pretended i was fine. that i wasnt weak and pathetic. that i was good and not an annoyance or burden.#i am not weak. i am not pathetic. i am fine i am fine i am fine you dont need to worry about the inconvenience at your door.#sometimes the shame is so much that i cant look at myself or even think i deserve help. that therapy is for people with real problems.#that i feel like ill just be told im like this for attention or dramatics. that im such a disappointment and selfish too.#ive been a “problem” my whole life to the point i dunno if i CAN be fixed. that anxiety eats me alive every day.#therapy is supposed to give you methods to cope#i dunno if it'll work though. I forget my appointments a lot. i struggle to talk sometimes. i may be autistic but its hard to get diagnosed.#emotions are so hard to figure out.
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WIP DAY.
tagged by @girlbosselrond @morvaris @aartyom @risingsh0t @phillipsgraves @leviiackrman @indorilnerevarine & @denerims over the past month! sorry it's taken me so long to get to anything at all, i'm sure you guys have heard me address it enough, but thank you all so much for continuing to tag me in things while i've been inactive ♡
tagging @aelyosos @brujah @calenhads @florbelles @jendoe @lightwardens @liurnia @nokstella @nuclearstorms @shadowsofrose @shellibisshe @steelport @swordcoasts @wrymbloods @voerman & all of those who tagged me again cause i'm so behind + anyone else who'd like to share anything they're working on, not just writing! ♡
i haven't written anything since the last wip game i did, but i started trying to put diana's timeline together at the start of january, so i mean... i'll show that instead. as you can see, fatigue hasn't let me do much with it even though i've got all of her timeline already done and strewn about all over the place.
started with 1995 onwards cause it was originally going to be an ewskers timeline situation, but then wanted to include all of her backstory so i went back to the start and still have the late 80s and early 90s to get through before then, but yeah :]
it's going to include like all little moments i've thought of between the ewskers just for me and placing them on the timeline, so you can imagine how long this is going to get if i have to go to 2021 for village... like just 1996-1998 is going to be so much... she's very special to me if you couldn't tell already lmaoo
never sharing this though, it's just for me, and like will help for when i do her timeline page (more in-depth version of what's on her oc page) to just run through canon events and brief descriptions and whatnot. you understand.
everything is blurred out besides 1995 ewskers momence and the years, just cause like idk her i feel weird sharing her in-depth backstory unless it's in dms or something, just cause there's lots going on there and yeah. things. idk
i also made a carrd for twt if you wanna have a look at that :] there's some cheeky subtle things with the two resi items i used as pics hehe
actually, you know what, i'll give a lil bit from where i left of with that rewrite anyways, even though it's been months since i wrote it. but why not
Wesker left a fleeting kiss behind her ear then reached around her and hooked his fingers beneath her coat, prompting Diana to glance back at him. But all he did was gently pull it from her shoulders. She watched him from out of the corner of her eye as he hung it up on the rack by the door, his movements careful and almost calculated, until he turned back towards her, and the warmth of his body returned once more. He pressed up against her side this time, as opposed to her back, and one of his hands found a home on her waist. The way the arm it belonged to was resting firmly against her as he began leading her towards the kitchen was comforting, secure, yet unmistakably possessive. And she revelled in it. He had quite the knack for handling her just the way she wanted.
#tag games.#keep going to do picrews and just zoning out 😭 i'm so behind on literally everything but it's fine it's okay (lying)#i'm having a day and a half even though i woke up feeling okay but oh well. my last month has just been like watching videos during the day#or playing games when i have a bit more energy but like i can't do anything that requires me to actually read or write things like words#are just not computing in my brain at the moment but it's okay like i'm just exhausted and hoping soon i can get back to writing because i#still have over 30 wips going lmao but yeah it's been a time a half with lots of appointments and seeing specialists again and trying to#sort things out. i've been more active on twitter which i've mentioned before but it's just because like it's easier for me to sort of just#like and rt things and not having to do my organisation tags and things like i know that sounds so just small and simple but that's how#i've been lately like to my brain rn that seems like a really big task. so i just keep coming on here randomly for a few minutes then#disappearing so i'm sorry that i've definitely missed so much and i haven't been around to just show my appreciation and love to your#creations!! also just everything that happened in december and then a bit at the start of january too like i'm just a lil paranoid about#being on here honestly so i'm trying to get back to it and be okay with posting again and i'm going to make a promise to myself to actually#filter more tags i think? just to help me with like not exposing myself to things that do make me feel uncomfortable in any way!! i'm#rambling now but sorry sometimes i just need to lmaooo idk but yes so cute lil subtle things from my carrd i wanna talk about cause why not#i didn't have to change the blue herb from re0 besides making it brighter because it's already teal toned which is so sexy but i shifted#the hue on the spade key like SLIGHTLY like it was so little. but anyways. i use this emoji ✨ on my twitter name and yes cause sparkles but#also. three stars. the s.t.a.r.s. badge and logo :] then blue herb because i will have no poison in my safe space!!!! take a blue herb or#leave please!! only good vibes and safe space here!! spade key because i'm ace <3 i was going to include the diamond one in there as well#because am demiro and like those are the symbols in the community. ace of spades for ace. diamond for demis (both orientations)#but wasn't sure how to weave the pink through the rest of the carrd even though cyan and pink together is so pretty omg
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i think im gonna ask my therapist to get me an appointment with the private psychiatrist she suggested
#yesterday was kind of the wake up call#for a few days ive been feeling very little… still feeling bad but like sort of numb and i keep questioning wheter i actually need meds or#not which .. in any case i will not decide but a specialist will but anyways#and i was looking through book fairs and how to get appointments with publishers to show ur portfolio and just generally feeling like the#most incompetent person ever and also like i will never get anywhere because my style isn’t exactly what u see in most illustrated books#95% of which are childrens books…… and those styles are just different#anyway i digress#my grandma called and she was like what are u doing and i told her how stressed i was and i just started crying mid-sentence and i told her#i dont know where to bang my head anymore its too difficult and confusing and i feel like im just not good enough and im tired of trying to#keep it together.. she knows im not well mentally#like i was SOBBING#and she was like u shouldnt think like that u have to be patient keep trying and contact those publishers and whatever#and i get that she was trying to motivate me but i just told her flat out i. am. unwell. i dont know what to do anymore with this brain#and i asked her to please not tell me how i should think because i cant#and i know my grandad was there with her because he always is and he heard and like an hour later he came to my house to pick something up#and he was like ‘earlier i heard things i dont like’ aka me being depressed out of my mind#and then he said ‘we should talk about it sometime’ and proceeded to completely change the subject to his gums problem because he was going#to the dentist….ok#and the funny thing is things like this where people acknowledge that im struggling but proceed to say nothing about it keep happening#like i have a friend that i talk to very often and we say p much everything to each other but now shes working so she takes weeks to reply#and i told her i was doing VERY bad and of course she has her problems too… and she hasn’t replied to me in like three weeks or so#and she sent a text basically saying im dorry i havent replied yet i want to have time to do it well and hear how youre doing but hear this!#and proceeded to tell me stuff about her work and whatever… which is fine but dont tell me u care about how i am if u cant even check in#when u do have time because clearly u can send texts…#anyways im rambling good morning i already cried and its not even 9 great !!
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okay i need to share this somewhere because i am actually quite proud, because i managed to schedule my first dentist appointment in uh, 6 years, and please don't lecture me about how i should've went earlier, i knooooow, but all i can do now is go as soon as i can and it seems like i will?? and with a completely new to me doctor as well......... i didn't think i could do that
#i know making the appointment isn't going yet and going will be so scary#but i know if i have an appointment i show up that's how my brain works#anyways ALL HAIL ONLINE BOOKING SYSTEMS FOR DOCTORS#because having to call is making this 7000x more hard for me#and this might be the start to go regularly again and get everything scary fixed or looked into at least which would be#........so nice oh my god
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The biggest male privilege I have so far encountered is going to the doctor.
I lived as a woman for 35 years. I have a lifetime of chronic health issues including chronic pain, chronic fatigue, respiratory issues, and neurodivergence (autistic + ADHD). There's so much wrong with my body and brain that I have never dared to make a single list of it to show a doctor because I was so sure I would be sent directly to a psychologist specializing in hypochondria (sorry, "anxiety") without getting a single test done.
And I was right. Anytime I ever tried to bring up even one of my health issues, every doctor's initial reaction was, at best, to look at me with doubt. A raised eyebrow. A seemingly casual, offhand question about whether I'd ever been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. Even female doctors!
We're not talking about super rare symptoms here either. Joint pain. Chronic joint pain since I was about 19 years old. Back pain. Trouble breathing. Allergy-like reactions to things that aren't typically allergens. Headaches. Brain fog. Severe insomnia. Sensitivity to cold and heat.
There's a lot more going on than that, but those were the things I thought I might be able to at least get some acknowledgement of. Some tests, at least. But 90% of the time I was told to go home, rest, take a few days off work, take some benzos (which they'd throw at me without hesitation), just chill out a bit, you'll be fine. Anxiety can cause all kinds of odd symptoms.
Anyone female-presenting reading this is surely nodding along. Yup, that's just how doctors are.
Except...
I started transitioning about 2.5 years ago. At this point I have a beard, male pattern baldness, a deep voice, and a flat chest. All of my doctors know that I'm trans because I still haven't managed to get all the paperwork legally changed, but when they look at me, even if they knew me as female at first, they see a man.
I knew men didn't face the same hurdles when it came to health care, but I had no idea it was this different.
The last time I saw my GP (a man, fairly young, 30s or so), I mentioned chronic pain, and he was concerned to see that it wasn't represented in my file. Previous doctors hadn't even bothered to write it down. He pushed his next appointment back to spend nearly an hour with me going through my entire body while I described every type of chronic pain I had, how long I'd had it, what causes I was aware of. He asked me if I had any theories as to why I had so much pain and looked at me with concerned expectation, hoping I might have a starting point for him. He immediately drew up referrals for pain specialists (a profession I didn't even know existed till that moment) and physical therapy. He said depending on how it goes, he may need to help me get on some degree of disability assistance from the government, since I obviously shouldn't be trying to work full-time under these circumstances.
Never a glimmer of doubt in his eye. Never did he so much as mention the word "anxiety".
There's also my psychiatrist. He diagnosed me with ADHD last year (meeting me as a man from the start, though he knew I was trans). He never doubted my symptoms or medical history. He also took my pain and sleep issues seriously from the start and has been trying to help me find medications to help both those things while I go through the long process of seeing other specialists. I've had bad reactions to almost everything I've tried, because that's what always happens. Sometimes it seems like I'm allergic to the whole world.
And then, just a few days ago, the most shocking thing happened. I'd been wondering for a while if I might have a mast cell condition like MCAS, having read a lot of informative posts by @thebibliosphere which sounded a little too relatable. Another friend suggested it might explain some of my problems, so I decided to mention it to the psychiatrist, fully prepared to laugh it off. Yeah, a friend thinks I might have it, I'm not convinced though.
His response? That's an interesting theory. It would be difficult to test for especially in this country, but that's no reason not to try treatments and see if they are helpful. He adjusted his medication recommendations immediately based on this suggestion. He's researching an elimination diet to diagnose my food sensitivities.
I casually mentioned MCAS, something routinely dismissed by doctors with female patients, and he instantly took the possibility seriously.
That's it. I've reached peak male privilege. There is nothing else that could happen that could be more insane than that.
I literally keep having to hold myself back from apologizing or hedging or trying to frame my theories as someone else's idea lest I be dismissed as a hypochondriac. I told the doctor I'd like to make a big list of every health issue I have, diagnosed and undiagnosed, every theory I've been given or come up with myself, and every medication I've tried and my reactions to it - something I've never done because I knew for a fact no doctor would take me seriously if they saw such a list all at once. He said it was a good idea and could be very helpful.
Female-presenting people are of course not going to be surprised by any of this, but in my experience, male-presenting people often are. When you've never had a doctor scoff at you, laugh at you, literally say "I won't consider that possibility until you've been cleared by a psychologist" for the most mundane of health problems, it might be hard to imagine just how demoralizing it is. How scary it becomes going to the doctor. How you can internalize the idea that you're just imagining things, making a big deal out of nothing.
Now that I'm visibly a man, all of my doctors are suddenly very concerned about the fact that I've been simply living like this for nearly four decades with no help. And I know how many women will have to go their whole lives never getting that help simply because of sexism in the medical field.
If you know a doctor, show them this story. Even if they are female. Even if they consider themselves leftists and feminists and allies. Ask them to really, truly, deep down, consider whether they really treat their male and female patients the same. Suggest that the next time they hear a valid complaint from a male patient, imagine they were a woman and consider whether you'd take it seriously. The next time they hear a frivolous-sounding complaint from a female patient, imagine they were a man and consider whether it would sound more credible.
It's hard to unlearn these biases. But it simply has to be done. I've lived both sides of this issue. And every doctor insists they treat their male and female patients the same. But some of the doctors astonished that I didn't get better care in the past are the same doctors who dismissed me before.
I'm glad I'm getting the care I need, even if it is several decades late. And I'm angry that it took so long. And I'm furious that most female-presenting people will never have this chance.
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toxic!rafe will blow your phone up the second you post something on instagram that he’s ‘iffy’ about.
you posted a photo dump which consisted of some random photos of the beach, some of your friends, one of you and rafe of course, but the one that had rafe seeing red was the last slide, which was you in a bikini. he texted you several times at first, and while you were literally typing your response, he called you. your fingers were typing so fast to respond to him that you accidentally declined the call, and he did not like that. you immediately went to call him back, but another text from rafe rolled in, saying ‘fuck you don’t talk to me we’re done’ you sighed loudly, knowing damn well he was talking out of his ass right now, so you sat back and waited for the inevitable next string of texts to roll in. which they did, only seconds later.
rafe <3: do you get off on making me mad or something
rafe <3: like i’m racking my brain trying to understand why you do the things you do and that’s all i can come up with
rafe <3: and i see at least 4 guys have already liked your post like that’s crazy to me?? thought i told you to block all the guys that followed you?? of course you didn’t
rafe <3: also who even took that pic of you??? bc i know damn well it wasn’t me so who the fuck you posing for with your fucking ass and tits out? WHAT THE FUCK
rafe <3: DO NOT PUT YOUR SHIT ON DO NOT DISTURB answer me rn.
rafe <3: nah it’s cool actually i’m gonna go hit up my other gfs so you have a good night.
you rolled your eyes at that last text, deciding to fully turn your phone off. you knew he would likely try to text or call you again very soon but you didn’t want to deal with it right now. this wasn’t your first rodeo, you knew nothing you could say to him right now would calm him down, so letting him freak out on his own was the best method to his madness.
three hours had passed since you turned your phone off. you had caught up on some reading and turned on your current favorite show, but found yourself interrupted by a knock at your front door. you expected it to be rafe, but instead it was a large bouquet of your favorite flowers and a gift bag. you glanced around to see if rafe was lurking around, but saw nothing. when he freaked out over text and was able to reread his actions, he usually waited a bit longer to show his face as opposed to a verbal argument.
you brought the flowers inside and set them on the counter before grabbing the card attached to the side of the bouquet.
sorry we argued. you are so beautiful and i love you so much. got you a little gift and sent you some money for food and i set your appointment with your nail girl for tomorrow at 10. love you forever baby -rafe
you couldn’t help but smile just a little. the flowers were beautiful and the note was pretty sweet, so you chose to ignore the part where he said ‘we argued.’ you didn’t get a word in, but you let it slide. especially after you opened the gift bag to see the new dior bag you had been wanting.
you hurried to turn on your phone, immediately seeing a $500 apple payment from rafe as well as a new text from a few minutes ago.
rafe <3: hope you like the flowers and bag baby. love you! :)
you: i love them. thanks rafe, love you too
rafe <3: good to hear. lmk what you end up getting for dinner and i’ll pick you up tomorrow to take you to your nail apt. can’t wait to see you baby
you would order yourself dinner that was obviously way less than $500, but you would send rafe a picture and thank him again. you’d facetime him before bed and conversation flowed like nothing had even happened just hours before. he’d ask you what color nails you were getting, tell you funny stories about the old men at the country club and excitedly plan what you two were going to do the next day. the cycle seemed like it would never end, but you often forgot about the bad when he was talking so sweetly to you and all you could think about was how excited you were to see him tomorrow.
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I'm a terrible writer but always get good ideas lmao
Idk if you've ever seen friends or not but there is this one scene where Rachel and Ross go to a sonogram appt and she has a whole breakdown cause all she saw on the sonogram was a blob and not a baby. (I'm pretty sure it was like their first appt or something idk)
I'm a sucker for dad!spence and you're one of my favorite writers for him.
Feel free to totally ignore this if this is trash lol💓
amorphous | S.R.
your first appointment goes exactly how you expected it to, but not at all how you wanted it to
who? spencer reid x fem!reader category: fluff w/ comfort content warnings: pregnancy, ultrasounds, doctors, pregnancy symptoms, emetophobia warning word count: 795 a/n: i have never seen friends but i hope that this fic does your request justice. ilysm.
You put on a brave face as you accepted your appointment card from the secretary, thanking her for her time before sliding the card into your pocket, trusting that Spencer would remember the date and time of your next appointment.
Everyone had tried to prepare you for this appointment. At eight weeks, all you were going to do was confirm that you were actually pregnant and make sure that you were measuring accurately. The internet told you that was going to happen. Spencer told you that was going to happen. Your OB told you that was going to happen.
None of that prevented the sheer disappointment you felt while leaving the obstetrician’s office. You lagged behind Spencer, taking the steps to the parking lot considerably slower than he was.
It didn’t take him long to notice, keenly aware of your every move as if he had developed a paternal superpower, your husband waited for you at the bottom of the steps. “What’s wrong?”
You opened your mouth to respond, gesturing over to the building before shrugging, “I thought it would help,” you confessed, sticking out your bottom lip in disappointment.
Spencer’s gaze softened as he ushered you off to the side and out of other people’s way. He knew you had been struggling with the lack of visibility that early pregnancy had. You hadn’t told friends and family yet, the only people who knew – aside from medical professionals – were the two of you.
“I just wanted to see it,” you mumbled, looking sheepishly to the ground. “I thought it would make it feel real.”
He nodded in understanding, using the pads of his thumbs to deftly wipe away any stray tears on your cheeks, “You saw the screen though, right?”
You thought you had been looking at the screen, but maybe you had been so distracted by the transducer that your brain hadn’t processed what you had seen. The baby hadn’t been in a good enough position for you to hear the heartbeat.
“Here,” Spencer said, setting his hands on your upper arms before guiding you over to an empty bench. Once you were sat, he dug through your purse and produced the sonogram images that you had been given.
Suspiciously, you eyed the black and white pictures that Spencer had gently set in your lap, “It just… it’s just a little white blob.”
Maintaining your attention, Spencer pointed at the picture, “Do you see this part here? That’s the head,” he dragged his finger over slightly, “There’s the body,” he showed you. Guiding you through the sonogram, showing you every part in hope that it would console you.
“I just…” you faltered, looking at the photos as you tried to see it as a baby instead of a blob, “I don’t have a bump, we couldn’t hear the heartbeat, I guess… I guess I wanted some sign that they’re okay in there.”
Crouched down in front of you, Spencer cocked his head to the side, “Honey, what’s the first thing you did this morning?”
Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion, “I showered?”
Spencer shook his head, “Even before that, the very first thing you did this morning,” he encouraged you.
Your face warmed as your eyes flittered up to his, “I threw up.”
“And do you know what made you so sick?” He asked pointedly. Smiling timidly, you looked down at the photos with a newfound fondness, “The baby.”
He nodded, “Every morning that you wake up nauseous and every time you’re tired in the middle of the day are all little signs that they’re doing just fine.”
You sniffled slightly, wiping tears from your face with the sleeve of your sweater, “I’m sorry,” you murmured, “You probably think I’m being so dramatic.”
“I think you’re scared, and it’s okay to feel that way,” he reassured you. “We’re gonna see them again, okay? Next time we go they’ll be more than three times bigger. Our little blob will have tiny arms and legs.”
You frowned down at the pictures, still frustrated that this was all you had, “Twelve weeks feel so far away.” You had scheduled your nuchal scan for the end of next month, which felt like eons into the future.
Spencer smiled at up at you, “It’ll be here before you know it,” he told you softly, “No more tears, okay? I still have an hour before I have to go to work, did you want to get something to eat?”
Nodding softly, you put the photos back in your purse before standing up, “Yeah, maybe something with raspberries? That’s how big my phone says the baby is – the size of a raspberry.”
Tilting his head back slightly, Spencer chuckled at your proposition, “Absolutely, we’ll find the best raspberry dish in the district.”
#criminal minds#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#criminal minds fanfic#spencer reid fanfic#criminal minds fanfiction#spencer reid x you#criminal minds hurt/comfort#spencer reid hurt/comfort#criminal minds fluff#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fic#criminal minds fic#spencer reid x fem!reader#margot's requests#spencer reid dilf agenda#written by margot#q
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#the thing driving me crazy is that I don’t know how serious this is#it could have no cause it could be a new symptom of one of my health issues it could be an infection it could be cancer#and cancer runs in the family so my brain keeps jumping to worst case scenario#my appointment is on Monday but I bet they’re gonna send me for testing and who knows when I can get in#I have a migraine today and I’m positive it’s from me stressing about it#I keep trying to tell myself that if it is cancer both my mom and grandma survived it#and like they think I have the gene for it but insurance wouldn’t pay for me to be tested which was fucking stupid#but like if that’s what it is and it’s genetic then I hopefully should survive it because they both did?#but as you can see once again I’m getting ahead of myself#send good vibes anyways I’m freaking out#hoping it’s something easier to treat and not as serious#it would be so nice to show up and for them to be able to tell me oh nothing is wrong!
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Too hot to handle: Jason Todd x reader
SMUT MDNI!
As usual sorry for all the typos, grammar mistakes etc. I really had to post it XD
***
Y/N was fuming.
For no reason at all, falling down the internet hole, she found herself on some stupid forum for stupid horny women who couldn't keep it in their pants.
Clearly those bitches were getting hot and bothered for Red Hood, shamelessly sharing their dirty thoughts and comments on some parts of his body and the things he'd let him do if--
Fuck.
She could have Tim or Babs trace their IP addresses in a second and could pay them a visit of a very possessive, angered and super jealous girlfriend.
Her hands were almost itching to write a few spicy comments herself, spilling the beans of whose body Red Hood was touching almost every night. Whose lips he was devouring. Whose most sensitive parts he was tasting with his tongue, begging for as much as a drop of sweetness. Whose moans and gasps he got to hear, whose voice was his drug, whose curves he was worshiping on his knees.
Obviously, she couldn't do that, but the thought of Jason's muscled body on top of her, his hands tracing her skin and joining her in the intimate dance had a side effect seeping through her panties.
She needed him.
With the need that could not be satisfied with her fingers or even the toys she had stacked safely in the locked bottom drawer.
Jason ...
Come home...
Can't you sense how much I want you now...
She almost prayed to the moon on the sky to bring her lover back to her.
***
That little tingling on his skin was something new and as much as he hated to put the thought into words, it was like a spider-sense. The one of Y/N’s second favorite self-appointed hero – spiderman.
Y/n…
Was that feeling because she was in danger?
Did someone hurt her? Did anyone dare lay a finger on his precious girl?
Jason gritted his teeth, clenching fists, anger at a purely potential enemy flooded his brain.
It was a quiet night either way, giving him a perfect opportunity to take a quick detour and check on his angel. Just a look and assurance that she was safe, to help him keep going and push him through all the shit and doubts.
Y/n….
***
He did not expect her to sit in front of Netflix at 2 am. She had work in the morning so why on earth was she watching the series?
“Hey!” he called, probably a little bit too loud, causing her to jump on the couch and almost drop the mug. “Sorry…”
“Next time give me a heads up, will you?” she muttered with a pout.
“Um- okay. What’s with the attitude?”
“Nothing.” Y/N scoffed angrily, turning back to the TV.
“Can I please get my girlfriend back? You know, the other one? Nice and caring? The one who would ask me if I’m hurt or maybe need patching or a post-patrol kiss?” Jason teased moving in front of the screen, successfully blocking it from her view. “Wait… Y/N, are you watching “Too hot to handle?" His laugh filled the room, because honestly that might have been the funniest thing in the whole week. His serious, a bit reserved, goody-two-shoes girl had her eyes on the show about horny singles.
“Shut up…”
“Oh, I will most definitely not shut up about it. Are you hinting at something, here? Cause you know, you don’t need a show like this if—” he switched a little, coming closer and leaning over her silhouette on the couch
“Shut up, Jason!”
“Whoa!” his hands raised in feigned surrender “someone’s feisty today, aren’t you?”
“I’m not feisty. I’m furious!”
“At what?”
“Girls!”
“Wait, what?” Jason frowned “I am confused.
“Girls! Women! The ones who are trying to bang and –”
“I thought you liked banging?” he sent her a knowing smirk
“Jason!”
“Come on, sunshine, you cannot hide that blush.” He pointed out, brushing fingers over her reddened cheeks, raising her head so she had to look into his eyes “What’s gotten into you? Tell me the truth.”
“Stupid internet.”
“Mhm. Okay. Care to elaborate?”
“Did you know the girls are getting hot for the Red Hood on some stupid forum?”
“Nope. Did not. But… did it make you jealous?” he smirked, expecting her to deny and squirm in embarrassment that he accused her of such low feelings.
“Yeah…” Much to his surprise, she decided to be honest. It truly was a strange night. “Yeah, I was. Jealous and furious. Hence the “Too hot to handle” marathon.”
“Hm? Can’t see the correlation.”
“It’s so shallow and selfish and mean, but – the show is so silly and most possibly fabricated. I may, or may not have been trying to diminish women who are openly horny….?” Her voice became barely audible at the end, as if she was ashamed to admit her own .
“Oh, you silly little one.” Jason laughed, pulling her onto his lap and brushing hair out of her forehead. “You could have led with that.” His lips brushed over her forehead
“Hm? What do you mean?”
“You should have told me, that coming across girls leching over me-“
“Over Red Hood!” she interrupted and he only laughed again.
“Over me” he underlined “- got your knickers in a twist.”
“It did not!”
Great, now she was trying to deny it. Too bad it was too late and he was in the mood for the games anymore. He felt the need to assure her that she was the one, though also expressing appreciation for said open horniness and for a little bit of jealousy. It made his ego soar.
“Didn’t it?” he teased, grabbing onto her waist and laying her on her back, hovering over her, moving fingers up her leg, until it reached the hem of her sleeping shorts. “Maybe I should check myself then?”
His hand brushed over the inside of her thigh, causing her to let out a sharp exhale.
“Oh, right… My little minx is not wearing panties at all. So it seems like you have been telling the truth after all. You did not get them in a twist…”
He leaned forward, pressing his lips to her, a sudden sweet distraction allowing him to yank those silly little shorts down, exposing her want without any care in the world. Opening her legs and wrapping them on his waist, without breaking the kiss for even a second, Jason pressed his weight on her, distributing it evenly on his forearms, to not crash her.
“Mmm. Tease.”
“And you love every second of it.” He smirked, grinding against her core, sacrificing his favorite tactical pants to her warmth and wetness. Not much of an exorbitant price for what was waiting at the finish line.
And even though it was just the beginning of the marathon, they were already gasping heavily, grasping onto each other, pulling each other closer and closer. She was so needy and he loved it. The more bothered she was, the easier it got for him to end on the winner’s podium. His cock was hardening by a second, making it almost painful to be kept in the pants, but he was holding back.
“Jason…” she moaned, reaching down his torso, sneaking hand under the waistband.
“Not yet, baby.” All she got in return was her hands pinned above her head in a very vulnerable position, completely at his mercy. And to add to it all, Jason lips attached to her pulse point, sucking the sensitive skin, making sure to leave a dark purple hickey. The one she wouldn’t be able to cover easily. “Not yet…” the grip on her wrists faltered for a second, but not enough to allow her to break free.
Jason was skillful and knew exactly what he was doing. Feeding her with the false hope of freedom only for a second, only to grab her hands in one hand, using the other to roll her sleeping shirt up, exposing her breasts, but not taking it off fully.
“Hello, lovelies…” he muttered, before diving between her tits, getting the arching back and multiple sounds of pleasure in return. “Yeah… keep those sounds coming, baby…”
His lips traced a scorching path down her cleavage, making her want skyrocket, smirking upon the feeling of her legs tightening on his waist and her hips grinding against her jeans.
“Not yet.” He commanded again, pressing her back flat onto the couch. “Not yet…” his eyes flashed with something primal and animalistic. There was something devilishly turning on with having her naked under him, while he didn’t shed a single piece of clothing. And he was going to exploit that opportunity to the maximum.
With a quiet laugh that sounded almost sinful, Jason bent down and traced tongue over the flesh of her soft, warm breast, purposefully avoiding the little pink button that was begging for his attention. Yes, his ego was skyrocketing upon hearing her cries of pleasure and broken gasps of his name on her swollen lips, followed by the flexing of her body against his touch.
Yes, he might have been acting a little dominant, but they both knew it was not going to go on forever.
Deep inside Jason was sweet and romantic, definitely putting soft, tender lovemaking over hard and rough sex.
And really, it didn’t take him long to give in to her pleadings and entreaties, moving lips to her nipple, sucking and biting on it gently.
“Oh yes!” she cried out, closing her eyes and from that moment things started taking on the pace. Jason groaned from the sensation of her breast in his mouth, letting go of her wrists, allowing her hands to tangle in his hair, only adding to the feelings burning inside his chest and groin. Abandoning lavishing attention on her chest, he guided her hands to the hem of his shirt and with interlaced fingers and eyes never faltering from each other’s face they pulled it over his head, exposing his toned upper body, covered with fresh bruises and cuts.
“So you are hurt…” she whispered, touching the pads of her fingers to the newest purple mark on his pec.
“I didn’t notice…” his voice was deep, calming and full of adoration “All I notice right now is you…” he grabbed her hand pressing it to his lips, kissing all over her knuckles.
“Then come feel me too…” she moved upwards, pressing her lips to his, wanting to feel that chapped warmth on hers. And once their mouths met it was a sensation incomparable with anything else. Ironically (or not) making out like this, with their entwined bodies, separated only by the material of his pants, slowly, tenderly, focused only on each other, leaving the whole world behind was turning her on more than actual penetration.
Which did not mean she didn’t want to go all the way.
“Is it time yet?” she whispered, with a little bit of teasing in her voice, breaking the kiss only for a second.
“You are ruining the moment, sunshine.” He chuckled, tracing kisses up her cheek, all the way to her ear, softly biting on her earlobe, causing more tickling than actual pain. Y/N responded with a little chuckle as well, cupping his cheek, bringing his lips back to hers once more. Without breaking the making out for even one second, Y/N removed his belt and undid the button on his pants. Then, with a few kicks and swings of legs, they managed to set him free from his confines, finally feeling each other from head to toe.
“How’s your jealousy doing now…?” he teased, guiding himself to her entrance, grabbing onto her waist, rolling his fingers in tiny circles on her sensitive skin.
“Who’s ruining the moment now?”
“No idea. Who?” he chuckled. It was so good being with her like this. In the moment of intimacy, that was meaningful but deprived of the seriousness that could ruin the tenderness. Perfect mix of softness and love, seasoned with a bit of well balanced humor and sarcasm that bonded them in the first place. “You ready for me, baby?”
“So ready.” She smiled, shifting and squirming to allow him to slide inside better and maximize the pleasure of unity for them both.
“Mh. Hello there…” he smirked and without missing a bit started to move inside her. Slowly, but intensely. Building up and drawing the tension. Moving hands on her body in time with the thrusts, fueling the fire that was meant to warm but not burn. “Is this what you wanted?” he looked at her face searching for the answers behind those e/c eyes, filled with longing and devotion.
“Yeah… Good thing you helped me realize what it was that I wanted…” she started matching his movements, kissing him again.
The tension between their bodies was building slowly and steadily. There was no rush. They had all the time in the world, that suddenly shrunk to only them two.
Jason and Y/n.
Y/n and Jason.
Together.
Connecting seamlessly, with bodies joined and heart beating only for one another. Creating their own bubble of beauty and wonder in the darkness and danger of Gotham.
“I love you…” he muttered, leaning forehead on hers, needing to say those words before everything turn into the blur and haze due to the slowly approaching tidal wave of climax.
“I love you…” she responded, feeling the exact same need, knowing well enough that those three little words exchanged before the post-bliss was far more meaningful and far more true.
***
“How’s the hate on horny women doing now?” he muttered against her hair, some time later. It could have been minutes as well as hours cause once they busted the pleasure door open time suddenly became relative and meaningless.
“Hm? What women? Wait a second. Are you really trying to tell me there are other women somewhere?’ she looked at him with a tease, raising an eyebrow playfully. “I am fairly convinced there are only you and me. No other men or women anywhere.”
“Hm… What I’m hearing is that I’m the only guy in the world for you?”
“It depends on—”
“Because sure as hell you are the only woman for me.” He added quickly, knowing what her condition was. “And no silly internet forum or contestant of so-called hot, naughty Netflix show could change it.”
“You got soft, Red Hood.” She smiled, nuzzling into his chest and placing a little kiss on his chest, close to his heart
“I can be hard when it counts, though.” His heart picked up the pace as her lips touched his skin “Honestly I can be anything you may need from me.”
“How about we both stay ourselves?”
“Works for me.”
Jason's arms wrapped around her pulling her to his chest for more and more aftercare and cuddles. It was a quiet night after all and he could indulge in some time with his beloved Y/N.
#jason todd x reader#red hood x reader#jason todd smut#red hood smut#jason todd x you#red hood x you#jason todd x y/n#red hood x y/n
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What about Reid with a ballerina spouse (gn or fem) I don’t really have any idea for it other than Spencer has kept the relationship a secret from the team but they’ve been kind of suspicious and find out some how? Maybe the kind of spy on him and see him going into one of her shows and at the end of the show they see him kissing her or something
“I gotta get going guys, see you all tomorrow!”
“Wait wait, hold on now. What’s got you in such a hurry?”
Derek watched as Spencer quickly put away the files on his desk and threw his satchel over his shoulder, he seemed awfully eager to leave.
“Oh uh… The library’s closing earlier than usual today and there’s this one book I really want to read, so gotta go before it closes. Bye!”
Spencer strode off leaving the rest of the team very confused. They noticed that Spencer’s been leaving earlier than usual and he always had a different excuse.
“I have a dentist appointment.”
“I have to go and get more postage stamps before the post office closes.”
He had used nearly every excuse in the book and knowing his brain capacity, he’d probably never run out of them.
“Penelope, can you-”
“Already on it my love and… it’s false, he’s definitely hiding something.”
“Anybody up for a stake out?”
Derek and Penelope turned their heads at Emily, both of their eyebrows knitted together at the suggestion thrown out.
“Prentiss, you’re serious?”
“C’mon, aren’t you curious? Reid’s never one to shy away from talking about something.”
“That is true.”
“Oh, c’mon Derek! We’ll be super discreet! We can even dress in all black and be like spies!”
Derek turned his head at Penelope and chuckled over the excitement he saw in Penelope’s eyes.
“Garcia, we're the FBI.”
“I know, but I’ve always loved those spy sequences in movies.”
Both Emily and Derek laughed at Penelope’s excitement over the idea of having a stakeout over one of their friends. It really wasn’t like Spencer to not tell them about something, everyone on the team was like a family and they were usually some of the first people on the know about big news.
A couple of hours later after Penelope managed to track down Spencer’s location through his phone, the team were surprised when they ended up at a theater.
Looking around the area, they spotted a poster for the upcoming show that was set to start in 10 minutes, the show in question? A performance of Swan Lake.
“Why would Spencer come to see a ballet performance?”
“I think I know why.”
Turning their heads, Emily and Derek look over to Penelope and see her motion to Spencer and an unfamiliar woman with him. The two of them seem to be talking and laughing, but not in just a friendly manner. Spencer’s hand held onto the woman’s lightly and his thumb brushed over her knuckles, a sign of something more than just friendship. The woman seemed to get called to get into her position, but before she turned to leave she pressed a quick kiss to Spencer’s lips and hurried off, leaving Spencer smiling like a fool.
“My man.”
Spencer jumped in his shoes when he heard Derek’s voice. He turned around and saw the grinning faces of his coworkers walking over to him.
“What’re you guys doing here?”
“We had some suspicions, so we bit the bullet and decided to check up on you.”
“And by “check up” you mean follow me?”
The three of them looked at each other, slightly embarrassed at their decision, but were met with Spencer chuckling a moment later.
“You guys are impossible.”
“So who was that pretty lady?”
“Y/N, we met at a coffee shop a few months ago and we’ve been on a few dates. It’s been going pretty well.”
“And she’s a ballerina?”
“Yeah, she’s amazing! I’ve seen her rehearse and this is the second show of hers I’m seeing.”
“If she’s really that good then we gotta see it.”
Penelope flew to buy the tickets, clearly very excited to see the new talent perform. As they all got to their seats and the lighting dimmed, everyone watched the performance with excitement, waiting for your turn.
When the performance ended, you were surprised to see a group of people following Spencer along. One of the ladies, who seemed very eager, walked up to you and gushed about the performance you put on.
“You were so graceful! I haven't seen such light movement in, well, ever!”
The woman’s compliments, who’s name turned out to be Penelope as you made out from the rest of the guests, went straight to your heart.
The other visitors, whose names were Emily and Derek, complimented you on your performance as well, but all your attention was on the man behind them who had an adoring smile on his face, one that was clearly directed at you.
“I wasn’t aware Spencer invited you along.”
“He didn’t. We got curious because he’s been a bit suspicious lately and had to see what was causing it.”
“I mean I knew you all worked for the FBI but I didn’t know you were that nosey.”
Everyone laughed at the comment which made you feel a bit more welcomed along with them.
“What can we say, some things you just can’t help but be curious about.”
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#spencer reid#spencer reid au#spencer reid fic#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid x self insert#spencer reid x you#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds#spencer reid x fem! reader#spencer reid fluff
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Doctor’s Orders
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
Pairing | Jonathan Crane x patient!reader
Summary | Jonathan Crane wears a weak dose of fear toxin as cologne to his appointments just to put his patients on edge. He’s particularly fond of how you react to it though.
Warnings | Smut, 18+, sexual content, manipulation, inappropriate use of fear toxin, obvi, very dubious consent, painful sex, fearplay, HEAVY breeding kink, forced breeding, technically housewife kink?, overstimulation, abuse of power?, ionno lol.
Words | 3.3 k
Notes | Based on this post. Credit to @lasagnebats for the idea. (Lowkey the plot kind of deviated from the whole fear cologne thing tbh but it’s still very relevant so whatever lmao)
Ao3 link | <3
Masterlist
It’s not mentioned in the actual story but it’s very important for the plot so incase you didn’t read the summary I’m going to say it again lol. He wears a weak dose of fear toxin as his cologne.
“How are you feeling today?” He asked as he walked in and sat down across from you, putting his briefcase at his feet.
“Better.” You said with a small smile. After only a moment though, your heart started beating harder and faster, and your breathing picked up. You swallowed thickly and cleared your throat before adding, “I- I think.”
“You think?” His voice sent a shiver through your body. You weren’t sure if he was purposely trying to sound threatening, but that’s how you heard it.
“I…” You couldn’t look at him as your stomach started churning.
“Please look at me when I'm talking to you.” He sighed, making your gaze snap back to him. “We won’t get anywhere if you continue to overreact to even the simplest questions.”
“I know— I know. I’m sorry.” You started bouncing your leg incessantly, trying to get rid of some of the nerves you were feeling. “H-how are you?” You asked in return to his original question.
“Always so polite.” He said with an amused smile. “Why is that?”
“I don’t know… That’s just how I was raised I guess.” You shrugged, not having a better answer for him.
“It has nothing to do with how terrified you are of upsetting me?” He asked curiously, tilting his head as he looked you up and down.
“I- I’m not…” You cleared your throat and wiped your sweaty palms on your pants. “I was just… taught to respect people with more authority than me.” You said nervously. But it was true. You were always taught to show respect to people above you no matter what, especially if they were older than you.
“I see. And you feel I have power over you right now?”
“Yes.” You said quietly. Doesn’t he always?
“Well I don’t want you to fear me. These sessions are pointless if you can’t be completely open and honest with me.” You looked away from him again and swallowed the lump in your throat. “I promise you, nothing you say will upset me. I just want you to be truthful with me… So I can help you to the best of my ability. Do you understand?”
“Yes..”
“Good.” He paused, seemingly coming up with the next topic of conversation. “You’re still having nightmares?” Your blood ran cold and your heart was almost starting to hurt with how hard it was beating. And all just because of a reminder of it.
“Yes.” You whispered.
“The same ones? Or something different.”
“The same… But I noticed that they tend to happen more after our sessions than on days where I don’t see you…”
“Yes, that’d make sense. Since we talk about it, it’s only natural your brain would be thinking about it more.”
“Right. Yeah— You’re right.” You said through a breath.
“May I see your hand?” He suddenly asked, making you stiffen.
“What?”
“Your hand.” He held out his own, waiting for you to place yours on top. With a shaky breath, you wiped your hand on your pants again, then placed it on his open palm. He turned it over so your palm was against his, then let out a quiet hum. Before you could ask what that meant, he grabbed your wrist and held your hand up, watching it tremble. He released you and you placed it back in your lap.
“Why are you so scared?”
“It… it's probably just because I started thinking about the nightmares.” That was the only explanation that made sense. It’s not like you’d be scared for no reason.
“Really? What were you thinking about?” You froze and looked away from him, trying to recall, but you never actually thought about them, more so just… remembered them.
“I… I’m not sure.” You said absentmindedly, still trying to figure it out. He sighed quietly and took off his glasses, examining you closely.
“I like to think that we’ve grown a bit closer since our first session. Wouldn’t you?” All you could do was nod wordlessly. “Almost like we’re more than just doctor and patient… Do you feel that way as well?”
“I- I think so.” You said quietly. It was hard to tell right now.
“Which is why I think we can try something that might work better for you.” He stood up and dragged his chair around the table, the loud screeching sound making you flinch. He sat down next to you and you waited nervously for what was next.
“I think… if your brain is half focused on something else— something pleasurable…” he placed his hand on your thigh and leaned closer to you, “then you might be able to talk freely about what’s troubling you. What do you think?” Your chest was heaving as you stared at him with wide eyes, not able to respond. It felt like your throat was closing up and the speed at which your heart was beating made it feel like his hand was on your chest instead of your thigh, pushing down as hard as he could.
“Is something wrong?” He asked once he noticed your reaction.
“I-” You choked out, not able to say anything else.
“Hm?” He waited, giving you a chance to respond. When you didn’t, he sighed. “As your doctor, if you’re in a state that leaves you unable to think or communicate clearly, it is my responsibility to do what I think is best.” His hand started snaking up your thigh, moving toward the center as it climbed higher. His touch was burning a trail on your skin and it was getting harder and harder to breathe.
“Just relax. You want to actually make some progress, don’t you?” You gave him the tiniest nod, unable to do anything else. “Good girl. If you can control your emotions, then we can talk like civilized people, but for now, we’re going to have to try this.” You weren't even sure what exactly was making you feel this way, but you trusted Dr. Crane. He would only do what’s best for you.
“Take off your pants.” He suddenly ordered, making your body go completely rigid. “I won’t repeat myself.” He warned and you immediately scrambled to take them off. Once they were on the floor, he grabbed your hips and guided you so that you were straddling his thighs, sitting on his lap. “Now, this might be a bit overwhelming for you, so I don’t mind if you need to keep your face buried against my chest or neck. Like this,” he gently grabbed the back of your head and pulled you into him, “see?”
“Thank you.” You whispered, bringing your hands up the grab at his suit jacket. It felt like your entire body was trembling now. “Dr. Crane, I- I don’t feel very good.”
“Shh. Your body’s just excited. That’s why your heart is racing and your breathing is shallow.” He explained calmly. You’ve never felt this ‘excited’ before in your life. “Are you going to let me do my job now?” You nodded, burying your face into the crook of his neck to comfort yourself. “Thank you.” His hands started dragging up and down your thighs, just getting you used to his touch, but all it was doing was making you more anxious. His fingertips felt like claws on your hypersensitive body, but when you looked down, you saw no marks left behind.
“I know you’re excited but you need to try and calm down.” He said calmly. “Take a deep breath through your nose, then out through your mouth.” You complied, though it wasn’t nearly as slow as he actually wanted. But it was an improvement. “Again. Deeper.” You inhaled again, trying to let the smell and warmth of his body soothe you. But it was like the deep breaths were making everything worse.
“Dr. Crane, it’s not— I…” He sighed and your stomach churned when you realized he was disappointed in you. “No- I’m sorry. I’ll try again. I’ll keep trying.” You rushed out, taking more deep breaths.
“That’s a good girl. Nice and slow.” His hands snaked up your thighs to your hips, then up the sides of your body, under your shirt.
“W-what are you doing?” You choked out, when he dragged his hands up even more until he was touching your breasts.
“Just feeling your heartbeat.” He explained. You gasped when he gently squeezed your breasts, groping them in a way that made your entire body feel hot.
“Dr. Crane?” You whimpered and he shushed you. So you clung to his suit jacket and buried your face into the crook of his neck even more, seeking comfort.
“I’ll need to remove your shirt. It’s obstructing my examination.” You hesitantly agreed and he pulled it over your head, then guided you back into the same position, now only in a pair of panties. “Deep breaths.” He reminded you as he continued. He only groped you for a few seconds before focusing his attention on your nipples. You let out a strangled moan when he gently pinched, rolling them between his fingers. You’ve never been overly sensitive there before, but right now, just the barest touch sent a shock through your body.
“Your heart is racing.” He commented, flattening his hands on your chest and sliding them down your stomach. He reached your hips and gripped them tightly, then pulled them forward to grind your clothed heat on his bulge. You gasped at the sudden movement and when you felt the obvious sign of his arousal.
“When’s the last time you’ve been fucked?” His tone remained the same; clinical, unemotional. It took you a moment to register his question, but once you did, a blush took over your face. “You’ve been a patient here for a few months now so I’m assuming at least a few months ago?” All the work you did to calm your breathing was gone in an instant. Words couldn’t form in your mouth, so you just nodded against his chest. “How long before that?”
“I… I don’t remember.” You choked out, finally able to speak.
“Poor thing. It’s been that long since you’ve been filled?” He cooed with faux sympathy.
“Dr. Crane.” You sobbed, fisting his suit even tighter to ground yourself. He was still guiding your hips and you started to feel arousal pooling in your stomach.
“Is that why you’re not making any progress? Your cunt’s been craving a cock so bad, you can’t even think?” You whined and started moving your hips on your own now, desperate for more. “Yeah I think that is the reason. You’re in your prime child bearing years, it’s only natural you’d be longing to breed.” You let out a strangled moan, feeling both humiliated and aroused by his words. “A few more sessions like this and you might actually be able to use that pretty little head of yours again.���
“Please,” You whined, tears of desperation brimming in your eyes. Your heart was still pounding and your breathing was still shallow, but it started feeling different. Before, you weren’t sure what the cause was, but now you know it’s arousal. At least it mostly is. He suddenly gripped your chin and pulled your head so your face was only inches from his. As his eyes trailed all over your face, taking you in, he hummed in thought, still staring at you with his piercing gaze.
“Misattribution of arousal truly is a fascinating subject.” He smiled. You had no idea what that meant. “Take off your underwear.” He suddenly ordered, making your eyes widen. When he stared at you, giving you a warning gaze, you scrambled off his lap to remove them. He started unbuckling his belt, then opening his pants. When he took out his cock, your breath caught in your throat. Where is that supposed to fit?
“Sit.” You tentatively got on his lap again. He sat back in the metal chair a little, dragging his eyes down your body. “Put it in.” You swallowed and looked between his face and his length, feeling your heart start pounding even harder. “Now.” Biting your trembling lip, you grabbed his cock and put it at the right angle, then slowly and apprehensively lowered yourself onto it. You whimpered when he first breached your opening, immediately feeling the burn of the stretch.
“You won’t like it if I have to take over so I suggest you do better than this.” He warned and you whined in response, but forced yourself down lower.
“It hurts, Dr. Crane.” You whimpered, hoping for sympathy from the cold, apathetic doctor.
“Enough.” He growled, grabbing your hips and lifting you off of him. He stood and spun you around to push your torso onto the cold metal table with a hand on the back of your neck. Holding you down firmly, he pushed his cock back in, this time going all the way. You cried out and scrambled for purchase on the table as he immediately started thrusting.
“W-wait, Dr. Crane..” You choked out, the burning stretch bringing tears to your eyes. Not bothering with replying, he removed the hand from your neck and you heard clothes rustling, then he was putting his tie between your lips and wrapping it around your head to secure it. Almost instantly those feelings flared up again. Your chest heaved as you panted, trying to ignore how much it was hurting from your heart beating so fast and hard.
He put his hand on your head this time, forcing your cheek onto the cold metal as he held you down and started moving faster. You sobbed out a moan and squeezed your eyes shut, trying to focus on calming down but everything was just so much.
“Is this what you needed? Have you been playing the role of the dumb little patient this whole time just to get me to fuck you?” You tried to shake your head, but you couldn’t move it under his hand. “I can feel you pulsing around my cock. Is it really that good?” The way he was mocking you had you squeezing your thighs together, but he couldn’t have that. He lifted one of your legs and placed it on the table, keeping you from getting any real stimulation on your clit besides his balls smacking against it with every thrust.
“Please!” You cried, the word being muffled by the tie.
“I know. You’re probably so eager to come right now, aren’t you?” You did your best to nod, despite him holding you down. “Is the thought of finally getting bred making you all needy?” He asked condescendingly and you let out a strangled whimper. “Should I let you come on my cock?”
“Yes!” You yelled, trying to make it sound coherent through the gag. He released your head and grabbed your shoulders, starting a brutal pace that made you almost scream from the intensity. The table was screeching against the floor with each thrust and you could start to hear his quiet grunts as he neared his orgasm.
“Go ahead then. Show me how needy this pathetic little cunt is for my cock.” He said and, despite the degrading words, you almost cried in relief. You’ve only made yourself come maybe a handful of times since being admitted to Arkham, so it did not take much longer for you to get there. You all but screamed around the gag when it hit you, making your legs turn to jelly. His thrusts didn’t even waiver, but you could hear groans coming from him. Wave after wave of pleasure washed through you, so intense that it bordered on painful.
When it was finally done, you sagged into the table, but your body immediately went stiff when the overstimulation kicked in. You cried out and squirmed, trying to escape it, so he grabbed your hair and yanked you up, wrapping his other arm around your stomach.
“I know.” He pulled your head back until it was resting on his shoulder, then turned it so your face was up against his neck. “Just breathe through it.” But you couldn’t. Everything was just too much. You sobbed loudly and buried your face in the crook of his neck as he fucked you, moving both hands down to grab your hips.
“Just be a good girl and take it. This is what you wanted, isn’t it? To be fucked and bred like a bitch in heat.” You let out a strangled sob at the degrading words. “No… It’s what you needed.” He growled, making you whimper. “Don’t worry, we’re going to keep doing this until I finally fuck a baby into you. Maybe then you’ll be less cock hungry. But we’ll probably have to keep this up while you’re pregnant because of all the hormones.” After your orgasm, everything your body was going through started to feel like it was from fear again, rather than arousal. His words were making you spiral into overthinking. You can’t have a baby yet— you’re too young. And also there’s the fact that you’re in an asylum…
“And I think… I might make you my little lab rat. You respond so well to such a small dose, I’m eager to see how you’ll react to something more potent.” Now you were truly confused, but you were also too fucked out and overstimulated to try and understand. “God— that’ll be a fucking sight.” He choked out, rutting into you more frantically. Tears started streaming down your cheeks as he kept fucking you, getting more painful with every thrust. But based on the way his sounds kept getting louder, you knew it’d be over any second now.
You cried out when he roughly snapped his hips into you and stayed there, wrapping his arms around your torso to keep you close and letting out a low groan. His hips bucked forward with every spurt of come that left his cock, despite the fact that he was already completely inside, pressed up against your cervix uncomfortably. Even after his orgasm ended, he remained buried inside you, keeping you plugged up for now.
“That’s better, isn’t it? Now you’re nice and full.” He spoke softly, turning his head to kiss your neck as his hand rubbed over your lower stomach. “Mm… I can’t wait to see your belly all big and round— your tits swollen with milk. You’re going to look so beautiful.” Even though everything calmed down, you still felt anxious and scared. “And I’m sure once that kid is out, you’ll go back to being a brainless little bitch in heat so I’ll have to fuck another one into you.” You let out a weak sound, unable to do anything else. Your whole body was shaking. With how you were currently feeling, his words sounded like a threat.
“Still can’t use that pretty head?” He asked curiously. You didn’t answer, but it didn’t seem like he expected you to. “You must need more, then.” You whined at the thought. He gently pushed your torso back onto the table and you hissed in pain when he dragged his cock out. When his come trickled out, he cursed under his breath. Using his thumbs, he spread your puffy, abused folds, giving him a better view of your gaping hole. You flinched when he used his fingers to scoop up his come and push it back in. “Lucky for you, I cleared the rest of my schedule today just for this session, so I can keep giving you load after load until you drain my balls completely. Maybe then you’ll actually be able to fucking think.”
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#jonathan crane x reader smut#jonathan crane x reader#jonathan crane smut#jonathan crane#arkham asylum#patient!reader
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can you write subby Abby and Ellie x reader? (It doesn’t have to be smut or anything)
oooh i l o v e this! let's make it half and half!
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abby x ellie x reader
☆ these two are a handful separately but together is a whole other hassle
☆ they're constantly in competition! who does more for you? who does it the fastest? who's the strongest?
☆ you give both of them equal amount of attention but they take satisfaction in drawing attention away from the other
☆ cuddling isss so amazing and warm! you can all sometimes overheat but everyone is to comfortable to actually do anything about it so you just all boil together
☆ lots of kissing! kissing here and there and everywhereeeee
☆ it gets the point where you tell them to cut it out and they never show their competition in front of you again...behind close doors tho is another situation
☆ " did you see how she praised me and gave me kisses when i took the trash out?" " oh yeah well i drove her to her hair appointment and we made out in the car for 30min"
☆ they act as if they aren't also dating?!?!
☆ neither one of them really adopts a dom persona when it's just them two it's just two subby masc kissing sweetly on each other
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☆ you thought sub ellie was bad?!? OH you haven't met abby
☆ she knows she's strong than you so she'll take what she wants if you don't give it to her fast enough and just take the punishment
☆ say you're fucking her missionary but you're going to slow and she wants it faster but you want her to wait she whines really loudly and just grabs your hips using you as leverage for deeper, faster thrust
☆ " why can't you just go fasterr." " abby baby be patient!" " ungghhh no! fuck- oh my god fuuuck yes please oh- yes ." " jesus fuck- abby!" ( no orgasms for a 2 weeks after that one)
☆she's literally insane when it comes to you and ellie. she's so fucking possessive and she can't even help it
☆ say you're just chatting to someone you just met randomly, they both stroll up with frowed brows and crossed arms ready to go home cause now you're not giving them any attention
☆ "baby me and ellie wanna go home now!"
☆ brats
☆ ellie is an angel when paired with abby tho
☆ she's your sweet babyyyy she does whatever you want whenever you want it
☆ abby is on punishment again so she has to sit on the corner while you give ellie head which is her favorite thing to do
☆ ellie is such a load moaner she can't even help it she just is so sensitive and always feels so good
☆" how does it feel ellie."
☆ she can't speak she's so fucked out on her 3rd orgasm in the last 30min...she also comes so quickly
☆ abby has punishments in sections 1st section no touch you or ellie, 2nd section she can touch only ellie , 3rd she can finally touch both of you and she cant cum during any of that until you say so
☆ abby and ellie are grinding softly on the couch their kisses become desperate chances to taste each other but they barely have the brain power together to actually move their lips so it's just them sharing their air.
☆ they had been at it for almost an hour, their thighs shaking and their clits throbbing. ellie had already come a few times and abby was finally waiting to get permission. there was so much friction and everyone was so soaked you could hear it as they moved around trying to keep their orgasms at bay
☆ you were perched in a chair across from them observing
☆ " please can abby come? her clit is so swollen and red." it's truee it was so puffy and pink. ellie rubbing her thumb against it definitely didn't help
☆ "i guess so."
☆ your dismissive attitude turned her on even more causing her orgasm to go through her body in a way she's never felt before
☆ she can barely say a word her eyes roll so far into the back of her head and she's overwhelmed by the pleasure
☆ her pussy clenched around nothing while ellie took the opportunity to drink up everything that was coming from abby cause her own orgasm untouched
☆ "what do you say?"
☆ "t-thank you baby"
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OH MY GOD WHO WROTE THAT?!?!
okay love you bye
#abby anderson#abby anderson smut#abby anderson x reader#ellabs x reader#ellie williams smut#ellie williams x reader#vi arcane x reader#ellie smut#ellie the last of us#ellie williams
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Full Circle (NSFW) Ft MiChaeng
Authors note: inspired by the picture…you know the one. @smutoperator your turn
Two weeks before your relationship anniversary and Chaeyoung's birthday you ask her what she wants,
“Hmm I want a threesome with you and Somi,” she says plainly. You blink multiple times. You, Somi, and Chaeyoung have hung out loads of times. Somi was cool that you liked her but this was a massive and intense step for your relationship. He’ll it caused you your last one. You gulped trying to figure out how to respond.
“Huh,” you ask.
“You heard me. I want a threesome. I want my two favorite people to take care of me all day. I want to be pampered and fucked all day and all night,” Chaeyoung said her voice oozing the sexy confidence you fell for. She knew you were going to say yes, despite your reservations because she knew you. You were invested and to you, that transcended your past feelings about them. Knowing this you were momentarily put at ease about it.
“Okay, Tiger. I trust you.” You relent and Chaeyoung’s eyes grow wide with joy.
“You won’t regret this?” Chaeyoung assures you that she knew your sordid history with threesomes. As the day nears your dread increases. flashes of your old relationship begin to haunt you as each day nears. Chaeyoung notices of course and reassures you when she can but also gives you decent space to parse and constructively deal with your feelings, and music. Now you didn’t possess her level of talent but you had become quite practiced and skilled in a few instruments she helped you learn.
“What if she leaves you for Somi? What if Somi seduces you? What if a meteor strikes you down before the appointed time,” your mind raced as you tried to find a solution or an out to this circumstances. Yet whenever you broach the subject you just see Chaeyoung’s eyes go so wide with joy anytime she mentions the “experience”.
The week before is stressful as she left you sexually ravenous and frustrated. A far cry from the sexual satisfaction you mutually enjoyed. She had forbidden you from touching yourself or touching her but she would touch you and make a great show of masturbating in front of you with reckless lewd abandon. This torture lasted seven nights. On the day before her birthday while you were getting ready for work you asked “Hey Chae why all the edging,” Chaeyoung smiled
“I want you feral so that you destroy my pussy. I want you so feral you fuck Somi and my brains out. I want you feral that all you can think about is using us for your pleasure,” Chaeyoung said with a lustful tone. This led to the most diabolical edging sessions she’s ever done to you. Before work, she grabbed your cock and began to stroke you as she said all of the things she wanted done to Somi and her. You stand helpless in her grip, like putty in arms hoping she releases some of the tension, and just like that she stops. She kisses your cheek and says, “See you later Rocky please get home safely,” She did just enough to rile you up but nothing to satisfy you. You grind your teeth. You could and should demolish her right now for what she did but no. It was her birthday and as a good boyfriend obeyed, but damn could she see it in your eyes. Her eyes seemed to egg you on then her mouth followed,
“Oh has it gotten to you,” she says, “you better go or you’ll be late for work,” she said with a sadistic smile.
The night before you had to avoid Tiger. for fear of losing control as her touch was enough to drive you mad at this point. You stayed out on something you don't do trying to take your mind off things. You went to the bar where you met Chaeyoung. You order a straight whiskey hoping the alcohol will ease your nerves. it doesn't. you sit alone until a familiar voice talks to you
"Hey stranger," You turn to see a smiling Somi. You wave,
"What brings you out Mr Workholic?" Somi playfully teases
"Oh you know just wanted a drink ya know," you lie. Somi sees right through it and replies
"Chae told me she's been subjecting you to torture in preparation for her birthday bash of us three," Somi smiles. You nod
"I just need a break. for a couple of hours at least. She's got me on edge. I almost called in just so I could fuck that smirk off her face," You reveal
"Yeah, Chae told me that you had reached your limit, but if it's any consolation she has also told me that she has also reached her limit not being able to fuck her "favorite cock and balls" like you did something to her. I have never seen her so down bad for a guy before," Somi teases
"I'm glad. She's so smart and talented and I just want to watch her succeed," You elaborate.
"I know now come on. it's time we give the birthday girl everything she has been wanting," Somi says.
you groan get up and head to your place.
you open the door and Somi and you are run over by the overwhelming scent of Arousal and lust in the air. both of you hear moaning and echoing but no sign of Chaeyoung.
"Oh babe Somi texted me she's on her way. Please fuck me before she gets here. I haven't been able to cum all week. I need your cock," Chaeyoung moans. At that point everything Chaeyoung has been doing to you. A light in your brain turns green that hasn't been green since your first night with Chaeyoung. without a word and in a flash you strip and your body moves on its own with a hunger you didn't know you had.
"Wow," Somi says seeing you move like a demon to her. you find her fucking herself with a toy desperately trying to cum but can't.
you spread her already open legs and line up your erect cock with her moist cavern. the two of you lock eyes as images flash through both of your minds about what you would do to the other.
When you plunge in she's tighter than the first time you tasted her.
"Ahhh," Chaeyoung moans. Normally you'd ask if she was okay but you are too far gone at this point. you rear back and slam into her with a violent intensity. Chaeyoung moans turn into screams. Thank God the two of you soundproofed your little love nest because otherwise the two of you would have woken the neighbors.
You thrust in and out of Chae as she is reduced to a blubbering mess.
"Fuck Tiger keep moaning for me. I am going to murder this cat," You groan as you thrust into her. out of the corner of your eye, you see Somi sneak to your girlfriend's side, and before Chaeyoung can moan Somi shoves her sizable bust in Chaeyoung’s haeyoung's face
"Suck on my fat tits Chae. I know you want to," Her friends say lewdly. the scene only serves as fuel for your already considerable fire. You keep thrusting in and out of Chaeyoung and watch as she sucks on her friend's tits. You smile at the lewd scene only one thing is missing. Nearing your release you pull out of Chaeyoung who whimpers pathetically before you cum over the ladies’ bodies. Ropes upon ropes of white semen paint both of them as you watch with perverse pleasure. Chaeyoung and Somi moan in pleasure. They begin to make out and lick your cum off of their bodies. You’re still hard though and you start to stroke your cock.
“Where do you want it, Tiger,” you ask
“Fuck Somi stuff her with that fat cock,” Chaeyoung moans as she breaks from the kiss switching Somi and her position.
“Yes please fuck me with that fat cock,” Somi agrees. Chaeyoung moans as she breaks from the kiss switching Somi and her position.
“Yes please fuck me with that fat cock,” Somi agrees. You watch as Somi spreads her legs while Chaeyoung sucks on her tits. Without a thought, you plunge into Somi who moans. While you fuck Somi you yank Chaeyoung up to you and kiss her. You force your tongue down her throat as she gives in the pleasure.
“You like how I fuck your best friend,” you ask as you pump in and out of Somi. Chaeyoung breathlessly nods as you plunge into her friend
“You want my cock to mark her womb as mine like yours?” You ask and Chaeyoung nods aggressively. You turn to Somi and grab her right tit and begin to knead it.
“What will it be Somi? You also wanna be my slut?” Somi screams yes in response
“Fuck me with that fat cock. make cum,” she screams as her wet cavern sloshes around. Where Chaeyoung is Tight and wet Somi is wet and slippery. Her pussy almost pushes you out with each thrust as you go in and out of her. It’s pleasant though but not as much as Chaeyoung’s tight snatch. Speaking of Chaeyoung you move your hand to her left breast and massage hers with your left hand while massaging Somi’s with your right hand. Somi’s pussy seems to open up before she cums. Squirt comes out forcefully pushing you out of her cavern. Not wanting to stop you pick Chaeyoung up and put her into a full Nelson before plunging into her. Chaeyoung moans as she watches Somi keep cumming, she laughs, before saying,
“I think you broke her babe,” she says as she watches Somi unable to stop herself from cumming. You watch concerned for a moment until Chaeyoung pulls you into another kiss.
“Cum in me babe,” she says when you break it “fill me.” She whimpers. Her soft look sends you hurdling to your orgasm as you finally cum in your girlfriend. Chaeyoung also has her first orgasm of the night as the two of you continue to fuck each other through each other’s orgasms. After calming down the two of you fall next to Somi. Chaeyoung passes out in between the two of you. You’re still hard though and try to fight your urges. The three of you had been fucking for three hours. It was 3 am and you knew Chaeyoung needed a little rest she was such a tiny thing after all but your body demanded one more release. You trace Chaeyoung's back tattoo hoping to calm yourself down but your mind races with more ideas more ways to fuck her and have Somi watch. Unable to control yourself you lift Chaeyoung’s leg and plunge into her. Chaeyoung jolts awake in shock Somi smiles
“I told you Chae that you were playing a dangerous game,” she says as she’s watched Chaeyoung’s mind melt. You marvel at Chaeyoung she moans for you and you thrust faster. It was then that you realized you were fucking her ass. Somi watches before she starts touching herself as Chaeyoung's tight ass constricts around your cock. You tightly grip Chaeyoung’s wrists as you plunge into her tight hole.
“Oh fuck tiger I can’t stop,” you moan. Chaeyoung moans her brain overloaded from pleasure as she tries to talk you down but both of you are past the point of no return as you both cum again. Somi watches in glee, and for the first time that week you feel back to your normal self. You finally relax and go to sleep.
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