#but i kinda lack the talent so where's my job that lets me shine with my knowledge of specific types of music

[born-to-lose]

I should get paid for being really into music

[tsukikoayanosuke]

(Temporary) Final Thoughts of Pomefiore Arc

Since this is my official first-time experience of playing this 'live', I haven't read the translation fully. So, I'll probably re-doing this after reading/watching everything.

Essentially what I like and what I'm mixed with.

I will first address something that has been bugging me since early update. And that's about the delay. Now, I'm not going to talk about the actual delay, but the reaction. Lots of people complaining and blaming the staff and just... Guys, give them some slack. Do you know what happens when you rush production? You'll get something like Frozen 2, where they had to edit so much stuff in just 6 months before the release date because of the failed test screening. As someone who once made an RPG, coding is hard, especially something massive like Twisted-Wonderland. Sitting in front of your computer for six hours straight, coding and beta testing over and over, making the OST, scripting, voice acting. This is a massive group project and it can't be rushed even if you want to unless you want it to be glitching so bad like the Ghost Marriage incident (or was it Fairy Gala?)

Especially during this pandemic and all its protocol. My parents are professors and even they don't go to campus every day, instead, they use zoom to teach and for work meetings. I barely go out from my own house except for physical therapy and volunteer work, which usually once in two weeks because we take turns. Are you saying the staff must risk their health just for a gacha game? Guys, they might be a professional, but they are still human. Cut some slacks. Be grateful we haven't gone into absolute development hell. Yes, the Halloween event was big, but Pomefiore Arc is part of the Main Story, of course, they will give extra care compare to filler event (which might be created in the first place to give them more time in Pomefiore Arc development, which is why we don't get any Christmas event)

On to the story, I don't know how to rate the scale, but it might be slightly lower than Scarabia Arc. Can you really compare a school talent show to a rebellion? Also, in paper, this should be more light-hearted than the four arcs before it.

However, the lack of stake didn't reduce the content quality. From what I remember, there is not a single chapter that can be count as filler, from Yuu's befriending Mickey, the understandably training arc, Vil's unique magic, Deuce and Epel bonding, and the actual VDC (but I do think the tour around the campus with Riddle and Trey was a bit boring)

Also, slight worldbuilding. We finally see Sage Island in its full glory and found out RSA is a freaking Disney Castle and on the same island!

This also gives us possibly the longest rhythm game, plus chibi Jamil rapping. There's just a lot of singing in this episode, which is understandable.

I appreciate Yuu finally taking notice of the Great Seven dreams, which I hope we can get more of this and actually do something with this and not just Disney Movie references, which later in the Episode shows Yuu sort of connecting their dream and Vil's poisoning attempt.

Speaking of Vil, he's a fantastic character. Okay, I aware that we can't like all characters, there will be haters anywhere. But it seems like Vil is hated a lot because he's 'arrogant' and 'only care about beauty'. Guys, he's not Jeffery Star. This Episode shows Vil as someone much more: a hard worker, passionate in acting, and a great teacher. I always see Vil as the more mature of the cast, the mentor. And he's also basically bullied when he was a child. "TV told me how to feel" as they would say, and children believe everything they saw on TV, so of course they would see Vil as the villain. It's also interesting, as someone mentioned earlier, how Vil is a foil to Leona, where Leona just gave up, Vil doesn't stop and keep striving, and that's an admirable trait. He just wants to get the protagonist role for once and break the norm.

Another character that I like is the new combo, DeuPel (Deuce and Epel). I should've known that they will be bad boy buddies with one trying to get away from the past, while the other wants to embrace it but can't at the moment. The shouting moment at the beach is wonderful despite I haven't read the full translation. Separately, Deuce shines so much with his willingness to learn. Meanwhile, Epel finally respecting Vil and all the training is probably one of the best character development so far.

Why one of the best? Because Kalim has great character development. How he grows to be more mature in this Episode really warms my heart. Again, I need to read/watch the translation to appreciate this more. The way he reassures Jamil to take the part as the main singer, but at the same time work hard to maybe get a spot as well is great.

Sadly, because Epel taking the spotlight as Deuce's partner, Ace was sort of underused. Same as Jamil, but sort of worse since he overblotted in the last chapter but has less development than Kalim. Rook also might seem doesn't do much, but he's more as Vil's support, which is why I kinda forgive him.

But, the highlight of this is probably our very own Snow White, Neige Blanche. Can I just say how much I appreciate that Niege doesn't have a dark side? He's a sweet boy and I just really appreciate that considering we're surrounded by a cast of not so great people, it's kinda refreshing to see someone just pure. The dwarves' design are also adorable, can't really say more since we haven't seen them in depth.

And since this is a School Festival Arc, all 22 students have a cameo. I know some people who are thrilled to finally Idia in the main story and to meed Che'nya again since Episode 1.

Unfortunately, Crowley proved to be useless again. When he finally appears in this final update I screamed: "SIR! Where were you?!"

Let's go back with Rook. What he did in the last update was definitely shocking. I knew something is wrong when he smiles after Vil's monologing. So this is the only time through the update I read the translation. And I sort of get it.

So, Rook and Vil's relationship should mirror how the Evil Queen and the huntsman. I mentioned above that Rook is Vil's support and I mean that. Rook and Vil's relationship is another level of prefect and their vice. It's just fascinating. Rook is just as reliable as Jade, but also not afraid to against his perfect like Jamil, also is not afraid to say something against his perfect, unlike Trey.

And it shows in this finale. Rook is always praising the beauty of things and Vil's hard works is truly a sight, but the way Vil unable to believe in himself, it clouded what is supposed to be something truly beautiful. Compare to Neige who is basically Snow White, the purest Disney Princess, there's just no way Rook would not pick RSA. I admit, I was pissed when RSA win, but when Rook started talking, I knew there was something more. And I finally found it. Rook's message is basically "believe in yourself", the most Disney-thing ever.

Saving the best (or worst) for last, I was terrified when Grim happened. We already guess that Grim is the same monster in the prologue, but I never thought it will happen so soon. The flashed of the monster and Yuu's carriage is also a point, but we have so little info that he can't pull a conclusion yet. Is this a timeloop? Is this a vision? This is the darkest ending we've gotten and I'm scared of what will happen.

Overall, Pomefiore Arc is an enjoyable Episode, definitely a step up emotionally. The cast are wonderful as always, the theme of hard work and believing in yourself are spot on, Vil's hero journey is great (I'll give more explanation soon). Great job, team.

[violetsoju]

destiny彡★

iwaoi · fluff? · 3.5k

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“Iwaizumi-san, just this once, please? We’ll treat you to that shop that serves the amazing agedashi tofu you love. You’re the only one we can count on now.”

Iwaizumi peered at his fellow colleagues. It was rare for them to have such a desperate look plastered on their faces. The look where they would literally pluck the moon if you asked them to.

“As long as I get the job done?” he questioned, amused by their reactions.

“Yes!! As long as we get to mark this case as closed, unlimited refill of agedashi tofu at your service!”

Iwaizumi tilted his head at the thought of that agedashi tofu he couldn’t forget. Closing a case and having agedashi tofu? Sounded like a win-win situation for him.

“Yeah, whatever. Remember to keep your words. Now hand me the case file.” he shrugged, extending his hand out to grab the file.

“You’re the best Iwaizumi-san! We’re counting on you!”

What’s the big deal of this case anyway, Iwaizumi thought. There wasn’t a case where he couldn’t close throughout his career as a professional dog trainer.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Iwaizumi let out a heavy, long sigh. Clearly this was not what he signed up for. It had been 2 hours, but they were still at square one.

“No wonder they agreed on an unlimited refill of agedashi tofu so easily.” he muttered.

“Eh, Iwa-chan? What did you say? Let’s take a break, shall we? I’m in need for some iced coffee now. Hachi looks like she needs a break too.”

Looking up to see a mop of golden fur sprawled across the brunette boy, he heaved another long sigh. “Just half an hour. Get back here after half an hour.”

Man, this isn’t going as how he wanted it to be.

“Hachi has been here for two full programs but we just can’t seem to get her moving. We can’t even get her to sit. That’s how serious it is. It’s not like she has behaviour problems, but she’s just too engrossed in her own little world. Her owner has started to question us on her lack of progress, and we’re questioning ourselves and Hachi too. Only if Hachi could answer her owner about her progress on behalf of us.

“So we’re planning to take her back, tell her owner that we really tried our best but it seems that Hachi is beyond our means, and express our regret. Could you do that for us, Iwaizumi-san?”  

What his colleagues didn’t tell him that how headstrong Hachi’s owner was.

“Please, Iwaizumi-kun. I know she’s quite a handful to handle, but I just don’t have the time to train her myself. Could you stick with her until she completes her training successfully, please? She’ll get through it one day! I promise!” Hachi’s owner pleaded with a look Iwaizumi couldn’t possibly reject.

Most importantly, no one told Iwaizumi of where Hachi learnt her mischievous antics from.

And boy, having two balls of mischief to handle required more than two hands.

The first encounter with the master of mischief was undoubtedly, a mess.

Iwaizumi was on an evening stroll in the park with Hachi as promised with her owner, when a scream suddenly broke the peaceful atmosphere.

“HACHIIIIII OMG THERE YOU ARE!! MOM WAS NOT AT HOME AND NEITHER WERE YOU! I THOUGHT YOU WERE KIDNAPPED AND WAS READY TO CALL THE POLICE BUT THANK THE HEAVENS YOU’RE HERE!

“AND YOU! WHO ARE YOU? WHY ARE YOU WITH MY HACHI? MOVE IT! GIMME THE LEASH. HOW DARE YOU WALK ALONG WITH MY HACHI.”

Iwaizumi swore that if there was no one around them he would smack the shit out of the brunette in front of him. “Hold up, who are you? I wasn’t informed that Hachi had another owner,”

The brunette waved him away dismissively. “Oh shush. Get on your way and give me back my dog, would you? Oh Hachi, are you alright? Were you scared walking with a stranger? Don’t worry, Tooru is here now……” he said, while continuing to babytalk Hachi, ruffling her fur and ignoring Iwaizumi completely.

Iwaizumi had enough. This was not how he planned to wind down for the day.

He tugged on Hachi’s leash and continued walking, leaving the brunette stumbling on his steps. “As a professional dog trainer, I am not allowed to leave my client with a person I do not know, or whose identity was not informed of beforehand. So if you may, please leave my client and I alone as we carry on with our lovely evening stroll, Have a nice day.”

“If she isn’t my dog, how would I know her name?”

“How do I know? Maybe you looked at her collar. Maybe you mistook her for another dog.”

“Nonsense? It’s obvious Hachi knows who I am. Look at her! She’s so happy to see me.”

“She’s a golden retriever. They’re friendly and warm up to everyone.”

“Well, you got a point there. But- Hey! That’s not the main point!”

The both of them bickered their way back to Hachi’s house, where the misunderstanding was cleared by Hachi’s owner, aka the brunette’s mother.

“I’m so sorry for the misunderstanding, Iwaizumi-kun. I should’ve let you know about Tooru if I knew that he was coming back today,” the older woman sighed. “You little brat, why didn’t you inform me that you were coming home today? I could’ve picked up some unagi from the store just now,” she said, smacking the back of the brunette’s head as he yelped.

“Call me Oikawa.”

“Iwaizumi.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

As the sessions progressed, Iwaizumi got to know both Oikawa and Hachi better, which helped with the development. They were currently halfway through the program, much to Iwaizumi’s surprise. Even his colleagues were stunned by the steady progress made.

“You know, maybe it’s because Oikawa’s with Hachi during the program this round. Going through the program together with someone they’re close to really makes a difference as compared to completing it alone,” one of Iwaizumi’s colleague commented when they dropped by for an observation during one of the sessions. “See how Hachi’s eyes light up at the sight of him? Man, he should’ve been here from the first program. That would save us all the trouble.”

They were right. Hachi indeed seemed more enthusiastic with the brunette around. And definitely more cooperative.

They were like two peas in a pod: The unlimited amount of energy they emit, the glint of mischief in their eyes, the blinding shine they radiate, the puppy look they give to get away with something, the way they whine and laze around when they were tired. No wonder people say the dogs do resemble their owners.

“Well, hopefully he’ll be here until the end of the program. I do hear that models frequently fly around for shoots if they’re top in demand. He looks really familiar though, has he been on major ads before?”

Iwaizumi glanced at the two across the lawn. Oikawa was exhilarated as Hachi placed her paw in his palm for a handshake, showering her with treats. Iwaizumi groaned, burying his face into his palms. How many times has he told Oikawa not to overfeed Hachi with treats?

“No idea. And I don’t want to know either.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Iwaizumi wasn’t much of a coffee drinker. In fact, he preferred tea over coffee. So why was he on his fourth cup of iced coffee within a week?

“By the way, why did you name her Hachi? Don’t tell me you got the idea from watching Hachiko. She’s not even a Shiba Inu,” Iwaizumi asked, sipping on his iced coffee.

They were currently chilling at the terrace of a pet-friendly café after their session for the day. It had become a routine for them to grab coffee together after their sessions. Not that Iwaizumi was complaining.

“Duh, of course I know she isn’t a Shiba Inu,” Oikawa rolled his eyes. “I named her Hachi because if you turn the figure eight sideways, it represents the infinity sign. I wanted her to have endless possibilities, as well as an abundance of blessings in her life, and that our love towards her would be eternal, whatever it may be,”

Oikawa leaned to the side against his palms, looking far ahead. “Remember when you asked me why I got a golden retriever instead of a chihuahua because you thought chihuahuas reflected my sassiness? Well, that’s because we didn’t have a choice. She came to us first.

“We found her in a box by the roadside on the way home one winter. She was just a small blob of golden fur, trembling from the cold piercing weather, but still breathing. Seeing her fight with all her might to get through the freezing night reminded me of how I should persevere with what I love, although I’m not blessed with inborn talent for it. So, I want her to be blessed with nothing but good things from the day the bond between us was forged.

“Maybe it’s because I kinda see myself in her too, that’s why,” Oikawa’s fingers running gently through the golden sea of fur. “That glimmer of hope she showed me still serves as a constant reminder that as long as I keep on going, I’ll reach the end of the rainbow one day. Nothing is impossible, don’t you think?”

Iwaizumi was taken aback. For a moment his mind went blank, and all he could see was how Oikawa radiated with a soft warm glow, so warm it created a weird fuzzy feeling in his heart. He had always viewed Oikawa as someone simple-minded and carefree. Never would he thought that he would one day find Oikawa to be charming. Maybe his heart had started to bloom for Oikawa little by little without him realising it.

But would he let Oikawa know this new feeling he had? Absolutely not.

“Wow, Oikawa. I never expected you to be so eloquent in such a meaningful and deep topic,”

“So mean, Iwa-chan! What do you take me for? A dumb blonde?”

“Except you’re not blonde. You’re brunette,”

“Iwa-chan!!!”

“…But yeah, you take after a golden retriever more than a chihuahua now,”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Iwaizumi tugged on his rolled-up sleeves unconsciously as he watched the scene unfold before him. It was his first time at a shoot, so the way the production crew scurried around with all sorts of equipment was new to him. Hachi seemed to be calmer than he was, sitting next to him unfazed.

He wasn’t sure if it was his nervousness or the lack of oxygen due to the number of people in such a small space that made him start to sweat. What exactly was he nervous for anyway? And why in the world did he choose to wear a dress shirt instead of a casual t-shirt? “It’s not like you’re gonna the one in front of the camera, you idiot.” he muttered to himself.

He would be relaxing with a cup of tea in hand while reading a book in his living room on his day off if it wasn’t for Oikawa.

“Iwa-chan! My manager just called me and said that the client wants Hachi to model with me for the new promotional ad! Sounds exciting, doesn’t it? Do you think she’ll be able to pull it off? I mean, I believe she will, but I just wanted your reassurance and-”

“One question at a time, Oikawa. I only have one mouth to answer per question.”

“Anyway, as Hachi’s professional and personal trainer, I was wondering if you could come by to my shoot to oversee the process with Hachi? I know that we don’t have any sessions scheduled on the day, but I would really appreciate it if you could be on set just in case anything happens midway. Also, as a source of support for me, maybe?”

It’s all for Hachi, nothing else, Iwaizumi repeatedly told himself. He hadn’t realised a figure walking towards him as he was absorbed in his mantra.

“Iwa-chan! You made it!”

Iwaizumi had seen angels in real life before. Well, anime angel character cosplayers count, right? Or during Halloween you could probably spot at least 5 girls dressing up as angels in Shibuya. Nothing particularly new, he would say.

The person standing before him wasn’t dressed in any fancy angel costume, but Iwaizumi swore that he saw luminous wings arching off his back, and a halo glow softly above his head. The comfort and cosiness radiated felt so much like home, and if he could, Iwaizumi wished to bask in this strangely familiar and soothing warmth, where he felt safe and snug in.

“Earth to Iwa? Hello?” Oikawa waved his hand in front of Iwaizumi’s face. “Why are you burning up red all of a sudden? Do you want me to get you a bottle of cold water?”

Iwaizumi rubbed his neck bashfully, hoping that the warm flush that was spreading to the tip of his ears would somehow manage to cease. “No, it’s fine. Maybe because it’s a little humid in here.”

“But it’s fully air-conditioned in here though? Anyway, thanks for being with Hachi while I was getting ready. I’ll take it from here! Allow me to show you how a top model works.”

Iwaizumi couldn’t quite remember what happened afterwards. Everything seemed to zoom by in a flash throughout the whole shoot.

The next thing he knew was the three of them back in Oikawa’s place, chilling in the living room.

“Kya, nothing beats a fresh shower and ice cream after a long shoot! Oh, and enjoying the perfectly timed sunset out there! Isn’t this just wonderful, Iwa-chan?”

“Shouldn’t you prepare your stomach for dinner at this time? Also, who eats ice cream right out of the tub? I thought models have diets to follow by.” Iwaizumi sipped on his cup of camomile tea he miraculously found in Oikawa’s pantry.

Oikawa waved his hand dismissively at Iwaizumi’s remarks. “You’re no fun, Iwa-chan. The best way to eat ice cream is eating it straight from the tub! Don’t tell me you haven’t tried this before. Also, this is just for starters. Dinner is the main course.”

“If ice cream is the appetizer, what about dessert? Milkshakes?”

“Hey, that’s actually a great idea!” Oikawa’s eyes sparkled. “We could make avocado milkshakes later, I still have some avocado left in the fridge. Or we could try that new place that serves pastries and milkshakes down the street. I heard they’re pet-friendly too, so Hachi can come along too! Sounds like a plan!”

Sometimes Iwaizumi questioned himself how he could get along with an alien like Oikawa, who was clearly from a different planet.

As both of their places were nearby, Iwaizumi found himself hanging out at Oikawa’s place more often, and the latter at his place too. Despite the difference in their personalities, they became closer over the sessions. Not on the instructor-client relationship level, but on a more intimate level. It may sound unprofessional, having the line between work and personal life blurred, but neither of them made the move to set it back in place.  

It was as if they forgot the eyes around them, from Iwaizumi’s colleagues and Oikawa’s agency. Will you both still continue seeing each other like this after the program ends, they would ask. Even the both of them were unsure of the answer. Or maybe they were afraid to let out the true answer hidden deep in their hearts; their innermost feelings too vulnerable to be revealed. They became too comfortable in each other’s presence. A sudden halt in this newfound bliss would lead them both hanging by a thread, ready to snap if the loose ends were not tied well together.

There was no turning back.

“Say, Oikawa. I was wondering, remember back when you said you were not blessed with inborn talent for modelling, what do you mean by that? From what I saw today, you were pretty good at your job. The shoot ended on a high note, didn’t it?” Although Iwaizumi forgot most of what happened earlier on, he still remembered how the photographer and production team sang praises about Oikawa throughout the shoot.

Oikawa’s eyes widened at the unexpected praise. “You think so? That’s a really nice thing to hear from you, Iwa-chan. You should shower me with more praises rather than shooting me with your snappy remarks. The more you say nice things, the lovelier you become. Same with growing plants.”

“Don’t change the topic and answer my question.”

Oikawa chuckled at Iwaizumi’s response. He looked at the tub of ice cream in his hands and was lost in thought for a moment. Iwaizumi had never seen Oikawa in such a manner. The twinkle in his eyes became clouded, his usual glow dimmed as though rain from the dark clouds casted in his eyes poured over it. He hated to see this version of him.

“I know it may sound ridiculous and absurd because it seems like I have everything in my hands, but that’s not necessary the case. Yes, I may be blessed with good looks that secures me a spot in the fashion and entertainment industry, but how far can I go with just that?

“I was offered opportunities in the acting and idol field before. I gave them a shot, but I found myself coming back to modelling eventually. But with my looks, I would often score jobs that were just limited to a specific category: being pretty. Not that I disliked it, but I didn’t want to be just a pretty boy. I want to expand my horizons, to try different genres and types. Because I believe I’m more than that.

“That’s why I stayed abroad for most of the time previously. I was fortunate enough to sign with a couple of international agencies and worked wherever opportunities led me to. The modelling scene is different from here, and I’ve grown a lot over the years and experience too. It was difficult at first, being in foreign lands, with different languages and work cultures, being jobless due to lack of experience and having no connections in the beginning stages. Heck, there was once where I was so close to being broke and wanting to give it all up. I even stepped on my pride to beg agencies and clients to accept me.

“But hey, here I am now. Climbing to the top was no easy feat, but I made it, and it’s all worth it. I’m sure you know what I mean. Runway, commercial, fitness, high fashion, I’ve done them all. I was able to fulfil my dreams and desires,” The dark clouds that were once looming around Oikawa cleared up, with a rainbow emerging to bring out the sparkle and glow that had been undeservingly hidden, which Iwaizumi loved.

“Many often ask why I decided to take on this path when I could have a smoother and secure path in the entertainment industry back here. I was more suited in the entertainment industry compared modelling, or I was born with a face to be on screen, they would say. I guess this worthless pride of mine got the better of me, and I don’t regret one bit.”

Oikawa turned to face Iwaizumi who had turned dead quiet after his long explanation. “An unexpectedly interesting and deep story, isn’t it? Come on, don’t be so serious. Were you expecting something more light-hearted? Or some over dramatic life-threatening story?”

It took a few seconds for Iwaizumi to regain back his composure. “You’re always a box of surprises, Oikawa.”

“And that’s what you love about me, don’t you?” Oikawa playfully winked at Iwaizumi, which was returned with Iwaizumi’s eyes rolled up to the celling.

Oikawa kept the now melted pool of ice cream back in the refrigerator and filled a glass of water to drink. “Anyway, I think I’ll be stationed back here for a while. I haven’t been back home for quite some time now, and it feels nice to be back again.”

“Are you sure you’re not staying back because you don’t have to worry about meals thanks to your mom?” Iwaizumi said, rubbing Hachi’s belly as she flipped over to enjoy the massage.

“Excuse you, I believe I can cook better than you. All these years of experience made me a fine man in all aspects, if you were unaware,”

“Besides, I think I found another reason to stay back longer this round.” Oikawa plopped down beside Iwaizumi, joining in Hachi’s belly rub session.

“And that is? To spend more time with Hachi?”

Oikawa looked up to meet Iwaizumi’s eyes. He could look into them all day if he could.

“That’s one reason, but there’s another.”

“What’s that then?”

“Not telling you.”

“Are you serious, Oikawa.”

“Think, Iwa-chan, think! It’s no fun if I tell you everything, right?”

If Hachi and Oikawa were destined to meet, then she would be the reason for Oikawa and Iwaizumi to be destined to cross paths. A destiny in a destiny.

[dirhwangdaseul-archived]

Hey I’m new to BL dramas and I was wondering what ones would you recommend?

I'm honestly not the best person to ask anything at all, specially with this because I've noticed I'm OK as long as there are two boys holding hands but let's try anyway:

The one that began it all 2gether the series, very generic, great chemistry, good music, and very simple yet perfect photography, it was my first BL and the reason I kept looking for more.

Where Your Eyes Linger: possibly the best BL this year, it's about a bodyguard with a lifelong friendship with his boss divided between the consequences of failing at his job and his growing feelings towards him, it's very conscious of the power imbalance which in general I find disgustingly lacking in many shows that feature a couple with imbalance power in the relationship, superb acting, great photography and the music was made for the show alone so that's freaking amazing. (Link to watch is the pinned post of my blog 👀🤫).

Gameboys: this is probably the first or one of the first shows that used the quarantine to set the story. Gav becomes infatuated with Cai after seeing him on a livestream hosted by Cai, a gamer, Gav doesn't stop there and starts actively pursuing Cai, through every social network available to him during the Phillipines mandatory quarantine. Really great dialogue, great production for a series entirely seen through the lens of digital media, and the best part, the actors, beautiful, committed, talented. I BUMPED THIS UP THE LIST BECAUSE THIS IS THE DAMN BLUEPRINT FOR BLs NOW AND THEY DIDN'T TOUCH FOR TEN EPISODES LIKE WHAT???? THE PHILLIPINES GAVE ROMANCE BACK ITS NAME AND ITS FIRE.

Until we meet again: some people say it's slow and too melodramatic, those people have never watched a Mexican telenovela that even with five episodes a week manages to give you slow burn for a fucking year, now that's slow. TW: suicide, the story is about two boys that reincarnate after killing themselves in a different crueler time in Thailand, probably one of the most melodramatic things I've ever watched but I grew up with telenovelas, it's literally made for me a hundred miles away from my country.

The Untamed: I'm late to the party on this one, but pffft wow, fantasy and gays???? The social classes, the clans, the dark magic, the detective subplots, the betrayal, the pain, it's everything I ever wanted from media. A true shame on the Chinese censorship but it doesn't really matter because the love in preserving the romance from the part of the crew shines through and through in every piece of this marvelous production. (It's on Netflix as well besides being on YouTube).

Together with Me: this one is kind of a nice introduction of the genre because it's the most tropey one in terms of BL tropes in Thailand, it's a lot of those tropes together in one drama. A prequel to Bad Romance which I haven't watched but they said it's ok, two friends sleep together one drunken night and while one of them decides to accept the feelings out of it, the other one doesn't, chaos ensues, anyway its kinda really bad but good too because of the chemistry of the leads and the group of friends too who would get a better time to shine if the villain wasn't a bit of a disappointment, still, this is one of those romance series that puts the chemistry before the actual plot and saves itself for it because wow those leads are freaking hot. There's another couple: it's trash 😗.

My engineer the series: lighthearted comedy about some engineering students and the guys they like, four couples enter only three leave the ring, I'm kidding, it's really cute and very pg series, all the boys are gorgeous and it also has two of the best kisses I've seen in a BL show out of how in line with the characters arc and personalities go which should be a norm but somehow isn't...

Theory of Love: the old story of best friends to lovers, Third is in love with Khai who he has been best friends with for three years while they finish their film studies (not engineers for once!), and well you know the drill, pining, pain and suffering in silence, cute gags and great friends all around, it features a really great production aided by the writing that pays homage to a romance movie with each episode, both international ones and some only known to Thailand, it's really freaking good even tho I wanted to strangle Khai the first half.

Dark Blue Kiss: if you have ever watched a Mexican telenovela you're gonna love the melodrama of this one, lmfao, I'm kidding, I'm making it sound so over the top and the intro really is, but the show for being so into its own drama manages to be honest, sincere and a really sweet letter to the LGBT community amidst the usual pandering to fujoshis these shows were created in the first place for. DBK features two couples, one beginning to know each other while another is already established and dealing with being together, both come from its prequel Kiss Me Again the series, you could watch that one too but I suggest you skip all the straight scenes because whoever wrote that shit clearly hated women like a lot which is how I think sadly the PeteKao scenes got to be written so well since they're both boys.

Great Men Academy: I debated suggesting this one but honestly I can't not put it in because this one has an actual plot lmfao, but the truth is that I decided to play a little game with myself while watching it which was making the protagonist non binary in my head and why did I do that? Because the story is about a body swap, a girl requests a wish from a unicorn to fulfill her crush on a boy she idolizes due to a TV contest, the unicorn like a genie does... fucks her over and turns her into a boy, probably one of the oldest tropes of writing mlm without committing to actual BL and even with my nb Googles the gender issues are so marked but the production is unlike any other show I have ever seen, and so there's a care to every frame, to every beat, to the audio, to the music, to the plot and of course to the actors and their capabilities, the cast is from a Thai boy band and they're all freaking hot like idk how this people found each other. Some people don't count it as a BL but I do because one of the boys is explicit about not caring about the gender of his partner beyond loving.

2moons2: there's a prequel sort of (2 moons), but one of the actors turned out to be an homophobe so they remade it with a new cast and new everything, and o boy I never wanna watch the other one because this one has some of the best dialogue and delivery I've seen, there's an actual eloquence to it that I really loved and made it feel more grounded even if I have my beef with the last episode the entire series does a very good job of balancing the three couples of this show, the plot is about college students although I don't even remember wtf they study.

3 will be free: probably my fav one because it's out of the college genre that most BLs and romance Thai series seems to be running on rn. It's a classic genre actually that I can't remember the name of: good and poor boy Neo finds himself running for his life after angering the local mafia, he crashes with a myriad of colorful characters and also the love of not one but two people, does he have to choose? Really freaking great, photography, music, the ending theme song is really beautifully written too, and the acting is stellar and special mention and the reason it owns my heart is due to the character of Mae, a trans woman that finds herself pulled to the mafia world after her boyfriend is killed while working for them played by the incredible Jennie Panhan, an underrated talent.

He's coming to me: I was avoiding this one mostly because I don't know what to say about it, other than in terms of BL is actually the greatest show done by GMMTV or in the BL genre, period. My reason for this is probably because of the plot being the center of the show while letting everything grow naturally out of it, as well as incorporating aspects of religion with such a simplicity to it it reminds me that religion is and can be a part of gay lives. The story is about a boy who died and can't leave this earth because nobody ever came to give him offerings during Cheng Meng, a Chinese festival to honor the death, one day a boy sees him and there's hope once more for Met to find peace. Crazy right? And yet one of the most grounded shows I've seen because regardless of how outlandish it is they let the characters feel and thus the actors do a great job of portraying such a situation. Idk what else can I say, the music, the photography, the fact that no skin is whitewashed, there's attention to the motifs, a fucking superb coming out scene, phenomenal well earned kisses and yes, a happy ending, he might be dead but that means shit when love is in the air. Also, my beautiful brown skinned number one, Ohm Pawat is one the leads and whew that boy, man, he's going places.

The HIStory web series, this one is truly a mixed gem, no other production has poured this much money and attention to the gays and on that alone it's amazing. It's more on an anthology rather than one story and each season has different ones:

History1: three stories called My Hero, Stay Away from Me, and Obsessed, the writing is not exactly great, but the leads are handsome and again the production and acting are great. Btw I actually liked My Hero completely because of the last minutes sort of redeeming the concept of the body swap girl.

History2: two stories, Right or Wrong, about a professor that neglects his daughter because of his own issues with being cared for, a college student notices the situation of the girl and puts and end to it, shenanigans and whatnot ensure. The second story is called Crossing the Line, high school student and troublemaker Yu Hao is forced to join the volleyball team or else he will be failed by his Teacher/Coach, there he crashes with the team but mostly Zi Xuan, who cannot play ever again due to an injury he sustained, hot tempers and a setting trapped in time is what these series is all about, very great if leaving everyone who has ever seen it wanting for more.

History3: the first story is called Trapped, four years ago a police officer and a mafia boss were inexplicably killed together, the case was never solved and the only survivor was the successor of the mafia boss, Tang Yi. Detective Shao Fei can't let go of it because the officer killed was his mentor, his obsession leads him to clash repeatedly with Tang Yi, now the mafia boss, who is hiding the truth of that day and has his own agenda concerning the future of his gang. Duuuuude, I just finished that one and honestly I'm still processing it, it was fucking perfect, it just was, the acting, the coloring, the motifs, the music, the dialogue, the delivery, the photography, the plot twists. Whew. Pure art. The other one is called Make Our Days Count and spoilers here because nobody deserves to watch that shit without knowing the end, but they kill one of the main characters for shock value, Xi Gu, up until the last episode (last two episodes in the case of the link I attached, idk why the release is different in Viki and online), the series feels like a love letter from a world where teenage years mean good things are meant to come into adulthood. It broke my heart because I already knew the ending but prior to that the series did every single thing well, and the last episode failed to actually tie all that beauty together and considering that the novel ends with them in the mountains, getting engaged while the stars look upon them, the failure of these series is a huge one.

Life Senjou no Bokura (or Life Love on the Line): adaptate from a manga with the same name, this Japanese BL tells the story of a couple throughout the years as they struggle with their identity and the expectations pushed on them by society and themselves, happy ending, beautifully shot, perfect casting. Bonus spoilery info: for fans of History3: Make Our Days Count the Japanese probably noticed Taiwan fucked up what was supposed to be a happy ending so they gave us a treat at the end of the series, yes we got our happy ending, in another show, lmfao!

Honorable mentions??? Why R U (honestly terrible writing, mediocre production, just weirdly hot and terrible, they got lucky with the leads, this shit abandons all pretense of plot around episode 8, but again the main couples and the actors really really carry the whole thing on their backs, really not pg at all with the kisses btw and that's it), Love by Chance (half utter fucking trash, half good shit, if you see a character named Kenkla appear just skip the entire scene), En of Love (engineers again, three stories with four episodes given to each couple, however unlike the History series these are all connected to the same groups of friends), My Dear Loser: Edge of Seventeen (its actually about a straight nerd coming of age story but the side couple is that of the gay boy who befriends that nerd, usual high school coming of age but I really found it cute and outlandish which I like), My Tee or Cause You're My Boy (someone dropped the ball hard on this one because apparently the novel is kinda cute and the plot can actually be understood... In the novel that is, it does have one but it's not really possible to understand it so it's saved by the great chemistry of the main couple which has made fans ask for another series for them, GMMTV has yet to deliver).

Final good rec, YYY the series: I purposely left this one last because it's a series that pokes fun at the BL genre, it's a comedy drama about a boy who moves in into a crazy building where nothing words and the days become supernatural or Sci fi, or both. It's probably one of my top three because of how well written it is and how much attention there is to letting the characters feel even when outlandish shit is happening like fucking washing machines sucking people into them, it's very short but I recommend watching last or after watching some other Thai series because by then you'll be familiar with the stuff the poke fun at.

And well that's all I can talk about for now, I'm still making my way through a list and finding new shit too, just a few days ago I found out about Addicted Heroin which is apparently responsible for ban of explicitly gay content in China's media if the internet legends are to be believed.

I don't think I did a good job recommending and I think I put all the ones I cried while watching which is my measure of something being good cause it made me fall and feel for it, but anyway, most importantly, enjoy yourself and if you have more questions I guess I'm here.

PS: I linked the ones I could find, a lot can be found on Gcinee and others I think can be found in my links tag, specifically YYY and Why R U which for some reason have individual English release via the network that distributes it, however most likely both are on YouTube. Anything else again I'm here to push you into BL hell.

as of may 8th, list of things i've watched and are currently watching that i can recommed but as ever i ask of you as any other audience member would to watch critically, if you're not asian you have the responsibility to understand these series are made within their own context: tropes, goals, clichés, humor, politics as well as identity, sth that becomes central in bl series as they're not quite romance entirely but also stories about queerness, even if the genre started with the less than savory fetishism of straight women, both queer men and other straight women have made strides for that to change, i put the ones that are 100% recced in colors so without further ado more recs:

blueming (sk, 2022) dir. hwang da seul

the miracle of teddy bear (thailand, 2022)

ocean likes me (sk, 2022)

mr. unlucky has no choice but to kiss! (japan, 2022)

the tasty florida (sk, 2021)

bad buddy (thailand, 2021-2022)

utsukushii kare (japan, 2022)

... (in progress)

[consummate-deviant]

I reckon I’m gonna talk about Hordak for a minute

So, I feel the need to talk about Hordak.  This is, perhaps, not unusual.  Once upon a time ago, writing stupidly long pseudo-essays about characters I rather liked used to be my thing… and it’s still a bug that bites me from time to time.  The timing certainly seems right!  Homeboy has been the topic of conversation lately, thanks to the recent release of She-ra season 4, and the manifold feels associated with it.  I’m fond of Hordak, as it were, so I don’t mind sharing my perspective on the subject, since there’s some confusion as to his appeal.  

The two stances I see taken on Hordak most often, by those who don’t like him, I should specify, are as follows:

A.) He’s an irredeemable villain who has done terrible things, and I don’t see why anyone would like him.

And

B.) He’s a lame, nonthreatening villain.

I’m not going to be engaging with mindset ‘B’ quite as much as with mindset ‘A’ in the following post, in part because the reasons why he’s so lame and nonthreatening are kinda tied to what I’ll be discussing by implication, but mostly because my response to mindset B can be summed up with the following: “You are not wrong, at all.  However, that’s literally the entire point of his character, so while you aren’t wrong to be disappointed if you were hoping he would be a more measured, megalomaniacal sort, it’s also not a failure on the part of the writers, since his lack of suitability for the role he was trying to play was always going to be what his story was about.”

Mindset ‘A’, though... well... that’s a bit tricky.  Ultimately “irredeemable” is a personal value judgment.  The threshold a character must cross before one audience member feels they no longer deserve forgiveness can vary quite wildly from another, and while trying to pass one’s personal opinion off as an objective fact is something of a pastime on the internet, I am- and I cannot state this emphatically enough- NOT your dad… probably. At least, I hope to god…  Look, odds are really good that I’m not your dad, so… you do your thing and shine like the crazy diamond you are.  I probably can’t change your mind, and considering I don’t even know you, it’d be kinda creepy if I thought I could! What I can do, though, for those genuinely curious how anyone could consider him redeemable, is share my own perspective on the character, and why I think redemption is the direction the story is going, based on how I’ve read the text thus far… So I’m gonna do that.  Let’s go over Hordak as he has appeared in the She-Ra reboot.

Part I: Season 1 Hordak

Now see, when we kick things off, I totally get where both the ‘A’ group and the ‘B’ group are coming from.  Hordak, as he appears in season 1, seems ruthless, intimidating, and single-minded.  Hordak doesn’t carry the conflict in season 1, serving as more of a background presence while Catra and Shadow Weaver, who have a more personal investment in the central narrative, do all the heavy lifting of antagonizing the heroes and angsting.

This keeps the attention off of Hordak, which is precisely how he likes things.  When people aren’t going out of their way to interact with him, then it’s easy for him to control what few interactions he does have.  That’s what season 1 shows us: Hordak, when he has perfect control over his own narrative.    Every scene that features him is shot with a low angle, often with his form either concealed in shadows or with his face partially out of frame.  When he speaks, he’s always calm and distant… but calm in that ‘he could totally fly into a rage at any instant’ way that keeps people on their toes.  Pragmatic, taciturn, perfectly measured and groomed,… pretty tall!  By any metric a reasonable person can measure a competent, intimidating villain, Hordak circa season 1 seems like he’d pass the test.

Part 2: Season 2-3 Hordak

Here’s the thing... though... about season 1 Hordak... that we learn pretty quickly when we transition into season 2:  Season 1 Hordak is a massive fraud.  Like, seriously, he’s a fabrication created out of necessity to hide a single, prevailing truth:  Hordak is an awkward dork who is kinda terrible at being an evil overlord.  

I’ve seen some people describe Hordak’s season 2-3 character development with the expression “You thought I was Ozai, but I was actually Zuko this whole time!”  Now, I like this expression fine.  I’ve borrowed it a time or two in the past, but with regard to Hordak, I prefer to phrase it like this: “You thought I was Emperor Palpatine, but I was really the Wizard of Oz this whole time!”  The former expression gives someone an idea of the tropes of the character pretty well, but the latter does a better job, I feel, of showing the relationship between season 1 and later seasons with Hordak.  Hordak is a competent, unflappable, all-seeing leader… hey, hey!  Pay no mind to the man behind the curtain! Hordak’s past… as a mindless clone created to lead other mindless clones in a mindless clone army… has left him laughably unprepared for the task of leading others.  He’s smart, like, in a general bookish sense, but he has no charisma, no interpersonal talents to speak of, and doesn’t really seem to have any grasp of how to motivate his underlings, save to reward talent with promotion.

Out of necessity, Hordak keeps his true self buried underneath multiple layers of protection.  The first layer is the season 1 illusion: Delegate direct command of his soldiers to a single adjutant, interact with that adjutant just enough to keep them in line, and remain in his sanctum all day, like the geeky shut-in he is.

The first layer is pretty nice, and seems to have bought him quite a few years running the horde… but what happens if, say, some uppity Force Captain decides to pester him with personal status reports… or some absent-minded inventor decides to raid his lab for a six-sided hex driver?  Personally interacting with his minions for too long will reveal the illusion he’s been hiding behind!  Well, fear not... This is where the second layer of protection comes in handy.  

Yes, Hordak’s second layer of defense: blustering, shouting, and intimidating.  Threaten them with dire consequences for bothering him, let them visit the planet with nearly-enough-atmosphere for a few seconds… do everything in his power to frighten them so badly they never want to directly interact with him again.  What should happen if this second layer fails him, though? They learn of the most terrifying secret in Hordak’s entire arsenal.

...There is no third layer…

Nope. If a minion is plucky enough to peak behind the curtain of his grand illusion, and then bold enough to stand their ground at the explosion of hot air that follows… he has basically no follow-up left.  One of my favorite nonverbal scenes in the entire series is the moment where he realizes that his screaming is having no visible impact on Entrapta.  There’s a look on his face that seems to say ‘What the hell am I supposed to do now!?’… like, it’s clear the dude has never needed a third step to scare someone away before.

Ah, but you, my savvy reader, have no doubt cottoned on to the error in my argument thus far.  Establishing that Hordak is an awkward, introverted nerd doesn’t really change the fact that he built the Etherian horde.  The fact that he’s not especially competent doesn’t change the bad deeds his committed!  Well, rest assured, you beautiful person who can claim no paternal relation to me, I agree!  However, characterizing Hordak like this goes hand in hand with the other big reveal of season 3: his backstory.  

Now, cards on the table, I’ve been taking Hordak as he comes, and up until this point I didn’t really have any strong idea of whether they were going the big-bad or redeemed-bad route with him.  It wasn’t until season 3, when his origin was revealed, that I genuinely began to suspect that the redemption path was where the writers were headed, because it re-frames his actions in a subtle, but pretty important way.

With no Horde Prime, when one looks at Hordak, they see a man who orchestrated a corrupt and oppressive system for his personal benefit, who holds others in disdain due to self-aggrandizement, and is motivated by a desire to be seen as greater than everyone else. That is a character who would be very hard to convincingly redeem. While I’m loathe to raise the specter of Steven Universe discourse here, it’s a lot like the notion of redeeming the Diamonds… and, while I have no strong feelings about that show one way or the other, suffice it to say I can at least see why their redemption is controversial.  

Horde Prime shifts the context of Hordak’s actions, though.  Now, Hordak is a man who perpetuates the very system he is, himself, a victim of, because it’s the only system he knows.  His conflict with others is born from the projection of his own self loathing.  Said self-loathing comes from his chief motivation, which is to be acknowledged as worthy by an authority figure who has no interest or desire in ever offering him that acknowledgment.

Such a character is still flawed and villainous, because of course it is. If a character has done nothing wrong, they don’t need redemption in the first place.  It’s a lot easier to accept the struggles of a flawed character if they’re a victim of oppression rather than its source.  To borrow the SU comparison one final time, the Horde Prime twist reveals to us that Hordak isn’t a diamond, he’s just another one of the countless gems caught in their system.  

By the by, does “perpetuates a system they, themselves, are victims of, suffers from conflicts born of projected self loathing, and desire to be acknowledged by an authority figure who has no interest or desire in providing said acknowledgment” sound familiar?  I hope so!  It ties into my final point of the day.

Part 3: Season 4 Hordak (aka “Hordak and Catra have basically the same arc”)

  Now, implying similarity in the character arcs of Hordak and Catra has, historically, been a fraught endeavor.  Even I, Hordak stan extraordinaire, felt that we needed to see a bit more of where the writers were wanting to take Hordak before we went and made comparisons.  Then season 4 happened… and guys… the subtitle of season 4 may as well have been “Hordak and Catra have basically the same arc.”

Well, that’s a bit of an oversimplification.  Catra had people she could perceive as her peers, which granted her a social circle outside of her direct superiors whom she could feel camaraderie with, which added a dimension to the emotional turmoil she felt, but in broad strokes it seems to be a comparison that the writers are inviting us to make.  Their alliance in season 4 is based around their commonality.  They motivate one another by feeding into the insatiable hunger both of them feel for external validation… in that regard, they bring out the worst in each other, and thus season 4 ends with both of them brought to their lowest point.

At the end of season 4, if the princesses had never arrived, and Double Trouble hadn’t been there to finally force her to confront the emotions she insistently projected onto others, Catra would have assumed the mantle she claimed from Hordak.  She would have ruled the horde, devoid of satisfaction or happiness, and any children she took into her numbers she would have treated in exactly the same way Shadow Weaver treated her, and the same way Horde Prime treated Hordak.

To escape that fate, she needed her chance to face the system that oppressed her, and then the chance to face herself… and only once she had done both, could she start to move forward again.  That’s why we see the start of her recovery in the final scenes of the season.  Catra did unspeakably terrible things- by the end of season 4 her atrocity count easily rivals Hordak’s- and not everything can be blamed exclusively on others, but we, as an audience, have seen enough of what made her the way she is… that’s why most of us are onboard with her eventual redemption.

Catra is, beneath all the layers of spite and illusions of who she thinks she should be, a sweet kid who ultimately wants to reconnect with a friend she fears abandoned her, and to be respected and appreciated by the authority figures in her life. Hordak is, ultimately, a hikikomori dweeb who, not too long ago, was content to spend the rest of eternity with his gamer girlfriend in his lab, pretending to put together a portal machine. 

The villain of She-ra is Horde Prime, and the system he put into place to feed his arrogance at the expense of those trapped within it.  For those inside that system, like Catra or Hordak, they don’t cross the line and become truly irredeemable until they are given a clear and unambiguous chance to escape from that system and change their life for the better… but refuse to grasp it.   Even then… sometimes it takes them a little while to see the hand being offered to them… and sometimes that hand is in the form of a fist.

In conclusion

Look, guys, I’ll be real with you… I made a play at pretending that I wrote this for some point or another… but I kinda didn’t.  When I get into a fandom headspace, words get stuck in my head, y’know? When they do, they buzz around like bees until I write ‘em someplace… so here we are.

I’m not so arrogant as to assume I can change anyone’s mind with my 4 AM word vomit about the emaciated bat villain in my favorite children’s cartoon.  This is just a thing I wrote!  Maybe if you agree with it it makes you happy, and if you disagree with it then it doesn’t get’cha too worked up!  I was gonna include Hordak’s relationship with Entrapta into the proceedings… but honestly, that would have doubled the length of this thing, and would have been kinda tangential to the point.  I may do a more shippy essay thing later on… but if there’s one thing I learned from the last time I wrote a bunch of these… it’s that planning them out never works well.  I guess if people wanna see it I can write it though.

Anyway, I’m rambling, so I’m gonna letcha go!  Thanks for listening to my TED talk.  Remember, villains are an artform, people are complicated, and hot cocoa is the best winter beverage.  I’m going back to fanfic writing until the next bout of insomnia!

[rqs902]

.

RENYU CALLED FAN YU. 

thats true friendship right there :’) mannnnn i really wish we could see them reunite one day

LOL WHY IS YANG CHAOWEN SO LOUD HAHAHAHA we love a boy who supports his friends LOL

ooof so if that tap dancing song is like the song with all the least popular kids, “first confession” is like the song that is filled with the 2nd least popular kids. 

HAHAHAHHAHA KOU CONG BEING THEIR LOVE MENTOR HAHAHAHHAHA

YLQ IS SO SHY LOL and he and cx are like the same age LOL ycy saying “hes too real” LOL 

i agree with yixing it wasnt like amazing but i thought ylq did a good job! even tho i kept feeling like that sweater was getting in his way lol... and i like wlk’s voice :’) i just love how wild its getting in the waiting room with all the kids LOL 

UGH just seeing the vocal kids’ reaction to them getting announced as the front runner? HEARTBREAKING. they’re all SO surprised. and up until the last second, renyu is like SO sure that it’s not them. and then when it gets announced, theyre all so stunned with their eyes wide and mouths agape, except huang enyu who just covers his face with his hands. this reaction is just... its so sad that they have such low expectations of their ability to do well. I mean i cant blame them, it’s a realistic reaction, seeing how things have progressed on this show for them so far and the rankings of where theyre at now. but its still so sad. 

AW kou cong being so supportive of huang enyu and huang junrong! saying “you can definitely win”, we love a boy who supports talent :’) and chen junhao aggressively hugging a dumbstruck li chenxu - awww friendshipppp

ive tried my best to avoid spoilers for the elims so my main thought for this next perf is just “oh gosh i really hope this isn’t sbh and syh’s last stage, but even if it is, at least they shone well in it” .... except for sbh’s last high note :( 

lol qby.... the kid’s so pure and sweet but i feel like youku giving him another feature is a sign they want to keep him around and im wary lol 

i agree i think syh did well! i really like him! but again why does youku choose to use age as a punishment for some but a pity point for others? AY JUNRONG CHEERING FOR HIM my singaporean bros

i agree xzx and cxh have improved a lot and i respect their hard work. 

junhao calling lin mo momo will never get old :’) 

oof again, if this is gonna be these kids’ last stage, im really grateful yzy and qzq got to shine. really yzy and qzq are good vocalists! was yzy center? bc im so happy for him if he was!!! amazing!!!!

mxy 辛苦了.... wait is that tyger training footage or am i hallucinating

so what youku is trying to tell me is... if you’re good, you should keep trying, and giving up is a sign of lack of perseverance !! if you’re bad, you should recognize it and give up while you’re ahead and go do something else rather than waste your time. so was zuo qibo not good enough? are lm and syh good enough? and so cxh and xzx have shown they’re good enough? but for kids like qzq and yzy who are relatively good too, should they keep going despite your lack of giving them a similar amount of attention? 

i feel like this whole segment has been dedicated to convincing me that liu cong, ma haowen and he yijun should give up. and im ??? how is this okay? wont this make them sad when they eventually watch this? 

LOL yes please give cui shaopeng a feature, its exactly what we need from this group. i love how he described everyone, hes so real LOL. but also the fact that xue en is just gentle :’) 

aw zixin..... really trying his best to stay cheerful must be hard. im happy to see zlj really cares about him. im grateful yixing recognized zixin’s skill in singing and dancing. but also im kinda just hoping that if this group does place top 4, which is highly possible, that zixin actually needs saving. bc otherwise itll be sad if no one in their group needs saving and they just waste that opportunity :\ 

YASSSSSS CUI SHAOPENG VOCALS !!!!!!! 

AHHHHH XUE EN GOT A KILLING PART YESSSSSS THANK YOU!!!!! 

LIN MO POINTING OUT THE MOST IMPORTANT PARTS OF THAT PERF I AGREE !!!! HAHHAHAHAHAHA I STAN HIM FOR A REASON 

i mean the rest of them were really good too! honestly a high quality perf, but still. YES JUNHAO EXACTLY! xue en literally can get your attention in 0.5 seconds, and he may not be the most popular, and youku may not give him nearly as much attention as he deserves as the WINNER of the last round (with 190 votes!!!!), but no matter how much time he has on screen, he takes that window of opportunity and KILLS IT. and im !!!!!! so grateful !! he did so well!!!

AW shaopeng’s smile when hyb says hes changed after cutting his hair is so adorable! 

aw zuo ye...... man its amazing when you think about how much of an impact cx has had on several of these trainees when she herself is still so young, but that tells you how respected she is, which is awesome. but also i do agree zuo ye has really really improved a ton!! 

you know, i was gonna say i was surprised they flat out told everyone that the vocal group was ahead, but actually im pretty grateful at least this means these kids who normally would NOT get any screen time (cough zhaohao cough li chenxu cough junrong) are regularly getting at least some screen time, which is great! but also it is sad to see that this screen time just consists of them being nervous and unconfident and stressed out thinking theyre about to get knocked down from the top at any moment. but at least... we’re reminded that they’re here, that they exist, and that they’re a force to be reckoned with. 

can we also talk about wlk sitting next to enyu instead of with his group? their friendship is so strong :’) 

wait where’s xue en during their dress rehearsal?

first thought is: omg did he go to the hospital and youku didnt give him a feature?? second thought: wait but if he was there to remember that gjm gave them that advice, did youku just crop him out or something? wtf 

oh wait look at this 

look whos sitting with the vocals now :’) 

they really like this shot of xikan 

and i do too!!!!!!

but cmon lets be real if the public (and youku) have the choice between voting for a group of amazing vocals on the brink of elimination and a group of already popular kids who will most likely all make it anyway..... if they chose the latter, i would literally flip a table. 

[lilakennedy]

Go read what viostormcaller wrote about the whole meme vs art situation, you really need it.

ok, right off the bat - i really need it? what the absolute fuck is that supposed to mean SDKFJG like? maybe you genuinely meant well, but  w h a t.

who’s out here calling it “meme VS art” ?  that is the furthest away from what we actually want - balance.

now into the reason of this ask, the post. i went to check it out, like you said. 

and the post completely misses the point. i wouldn’t talk about a post like this, but given that you brought it up - why not? 

but first off - this isn’t about the OP, i’ve seen many people make posts like this - and this one just happened to be the one you send me an ask about. 

like i said, it misses the point. the post brings up all the negative things we mentioned, but taken out of context. a good example is the way the EgoArtWeek event gets brought up, as if we all forgot about Sean doing that - but we actually had entire conversations about it. 

that could have to do with OP not seeing our convos/posts about it, fine, benefit of the doubt. but if i wanna make a good post, in the main tags, that packs a punch and makes people think? then i’d do my research.

i really loves the bit where it tries to guilt trip us all for speaking up about the clear fucking lack of appreciation for creators in the community. 

it is not something we make up. it’s not the like/reblog ratio we mean with that. 

it is a legit thing that’s been happening since the entire community’s focus shifted to jokes and memes for the sake of Seans attention. 

none of us started hunting down the people that make memes, and if someone dislikes another persons blog? that’s fine! you don’t have to like every single person on here. i dislike some blogs as well. 

someone saying that they don’t like another persons blog is the least personal critique you can give. and you shouldn’t take that personal, believe me.

the post just tries to apply way too much ice to a small burn you get from accidentally sipping a hot drink. 

like every post under the fucking sun that’s covering this topic, it mentions: “just take a step back!! leave for a bit!!!” and oh man. 

of course that’s what we need to do, instead of speaking our mind and trying to get something to change, get people to understand? yea we should just shut up cause Opinions Are Evil And Bad for everyone.

i know OP probably means it in a way of “if it’s stressing you out, take a break!” and i get that - but just sitting here in silence won’t do any good either. 

being told to leave and to shut up because of sharing your opinion, is something that stresses people out so much more than just sharing our thoughts. 

and oh boy, lets move on to my favorite bit: 

“Do you know how hurtful that can sound to someone trying their hardest to support you?” 

every creator i know has made it clear that the people that support us are amazing. they do what they can, none of us expect one person to carry our entire motivation on their back and then point fingers once we lose it. 

if a creator reaches out with “hey, feedback has been lacking! please make sure to leave some!!” and that makes you freak out? maybe you are the one that needs to take a step back and breathe. not us.

the entire discussion, the entire “””discourse””” is directed at people that can’t be bothered to care. don’t try to make us seem like terrible assholes for wanting our hard work to pay off in a way. for wanting to get the same feedback and interaction we used to get a year ago. 

and of course, oh of course these posts always bring up that it isn’t Seans job to interact with the community. and that it isn’t his job to cater to every single person.

no one said that. none of us. i have not seen anyone point a finger at Sean for anything to do with this. all we ask for is communication, and funnily enough - that is part of Seans job. 

i’m kinda disappointed in OP cause they had send me asks, they were involved in some of our talk but seem to have selective memory about what was said.

these posts overall have a real talent when it comes to that. taking all the negative/neutral things we mention and pretending we all ignore the good stuff or things we understand/agree with. 

and then they get put in the main tag - which none of our posts are. and that escalates it, cause the people that have no idea what we talked about out of the tags will think it really is that bad, it is that evil and cruel. 

these posts twist our words so their narrative and point of view seems like a knight in shining armour, whether that’s on purpose or not.

[queerchoicesblog]

A Promise Kept (OH/WT Crossover, Harper Emery & Ellen Thompson, Friendship)

As anticipated, my very first (official) crossover fanfic for the entry Friendship of the @choicesjulychallenge hosted by @kinda-iconic  ❤️

As I was playing Wishful Thinking I had this crazy idea: I started picturing an Ellen Thompson & Harper Emery friendship. They’re about the same age, they’re both devoted and esteemed professionals (dealing with scumbags like Ellen’s boss and Declan Nash *cough cough*)...long story short a friend-ship canon started shaping. And that’s the result: hope you like it!

Disclaimer: The fic contains a reference to this previous work as well as a personal background and FC (Gugu Mbatha-Raw is not the perfect FC but I get Harper vibes) for Dr. Emery

Prompt: Friendship

Word Count: 1988

Perma Tag: @brightpinkpeppercorn @melodyofgraves @bhavf @begging-for-kamilah @abunchofbadchoices @silverhawkenzie @kennaxval @strangerofbraidwood @crazypeanat @desiree-0816 @universallypizzataco

Harper Emery Tag: @bubblygothzombie @emeryharper @korrasamixfan  @delphinusbae

If you like this, please consider a like, comment, and/or reblog.

_____________________________

"Holy crap! How come I missed this?"

Aurora froze gaping at the box placed on her aunt's new desk. She stopped by to return her set of keys before starting her shift and found Harper unpacking her stuff in her new, well previous smaller yet comfortable office as "Head of Neurosurgery, Edenbrook Hospital". She had never been there before: she had only seen it during video calls but it was the first time she actually set foot there. There were a couple of boxes around filled with the little decor the place needed: her aunt's degrees, a few framed photos (graduation picture with beaming Dad, Grandpa and Nana; a rare shot of Harper and her mentor, Dr. Rabinovits, posing for the cameras and was that Alexander Evans, that former patient she heard of? Well, probably a family photo of the Evans wearing Santa hats), a small ebony sculpture, a painting of a Caribbean landscape and a set of wrist and hand stretchers. Books had already been organized over the shelves.

But that one...that was unexpected.

"What, Rory?" Harper asked, checking her bookcase.

Aurora's fingers grazed a frame before picking her up in her hands.

"You have been interviewed by Ellen Thompson? The Ellen Thompson?" she asked, showing the newspaper article that caught her attention.

Harper slowly diverted her eyes from her previous chore and let them linger a moment over the old article before moving closer and gently taking it from Rory's hands. A tiny smile filled with nostalgia formed on her lips: her younger self flashing an enigmatic smile to the camera casually sit on her desk was still in the dark of the tough challenges her career had in store for her. She was just happy, proud of herself; she was just forgetting for a moment the harsh reality of "that cruel science called neurosurgery", as Dr. Rabinovits put it. But the memory of that day was pleasant, comforting in a way.

"Yes, it was her last article she wrote before being promoted daytime anchor. I thought you knew? I'm pretty sure Nana has a copy of this, Marcus too probably..."

"Yeah probably...I must have missed it. I was too busy with college and my dissertation at the time probably..." Aurora considered. "But how?! I mean, I'm not trying to belittle your achievement, it's just...Ellen!"

"I know, I was surprised too at the time" Harper laughed softly.

"I bet!"

"I didn't think she would accept it. Because of bias, you know? She confessed that it had been quite a tough call for her, she's an incredibly talented professional and being accused of being biased is a capital sin in her field..."

"Biased? How could she be biased?" Aurora furrowed her brows, confused.

Harper took a pause and gave her an amused look.

"Because we're friends, Rory! Don't you remember?"

"You're friends??" Aurora gaped, plopping down on the sofa. "I really slept on this for years?"

"Well, we don't see each other as often as we once did now but we never truly drifted apart. And oh, you were probably too young to remember but she attended my graduation. Nana probably has pictures of that day...there was a small group of friends celebrating with us: you surely remember Bethany - she visited a few months ago, Nate, her college boyfriend, Ricardo, Alison, Elliott-"

"Oh I do remember Elliott! Your college sweetheart, dressed up to the nines and all googly eyes" the young Emery giggled.

"Glad you remember" Harper made a scene of rolling her eyes, smiling. "...and the most elegant of all was Ellen. That Ellen"

Aurora took a moment to reminisce the few memories she had of that day. Yes, probably...no surely! That girl in a gorgeous pink dress clinging her glass and chatting with Nana was Ellen. And...oh gosh, her younger self had even been so nosy to ask Ellen, that Ellen where she bought that dress because she wanted one just like hers. Luckily, Harper spoke again, saving Rory from the embarrassment of that moment.

"As I said we had somehow kept in touch over the years, against all odds. We were both so busy...her internships, her field jobs, my residency. But we managed to check on each other every now and then. Small things, even just a message in the voicemail or a quick call"

She smiled - a quick soft smile- and handed the framed article back to Aurora.

"When I became 'the youngest Head of Neurosurgery in the history of Massachusetts' she showed up at my door" she said, nodding behind her. "And announced that she was gonna interview me. It wasn't even up for debate, she would have signed that article"

"The hell with the friendship bias?" the niece asked, more and more involved in the story featuring two of her personal role model.

Harper smiled again, but it was a weaker one this time.

"Apparently so. She claimed that there were very good reasons to write it, even ethical reasons if you wish. She said that it was a story worth being told, that I could have inspired people out there, little girls in schools, things like that."

She sighed, shooking her head.

"Not sure I lived up to that inspirational role, but I tried, right?".

Aurora diverted her eyes: she knew what her aunt was referring to. She remembered the conversation they had the night before the hearing, their argument during the break of that hearing...and frowned. 

The weight of the last few words lead to a brief silence, interrupted only by the sounds of steps along the corridor. 

"Oh this must be Tanaka with Dr. Yannick. I asked them to stop by to sign those papers...excuse me, it won't be long"

That said, she hurried to meet the colleagues, leaving Aurora alone in her office. 

The Emery girl absentmindedly eavesdropped the three of them discussing a surgical oncology procedure but she got lost in the surgical medicalese the doctors spoke. So her eyes fell on the article in her hands again. She started reading:

“A Promise Kept: Why You Should Know The Story Behind Edenbrook Hospital New Shining Star" 

As some of you probably know, this will be my last article. Before you start getting sentimental about it, I do not regret it: I've spent so many years of my life typing behind a laptop and as much as they will always be an important, essential maybe, part of my life, I'm ready and eager for what comes next. You are going to hear my voice and see my face on your screen, brace yourself, dear readers.

I must confess that I was full of doubts about writing this article because I value ethics and professionalism. But I soon realized that ethics and professionalism are the main topics of this piece I'm writing and well, the very reason why this article should see the light of day.

So, for one last time, let me tell you a story.

More than a decade ago, I was a college student, an ambitious hard-working journalism major struggling over a research project. My professor asked the class to think outside the box and choose an issue we were not familiar with so that we were forced to document, do some real fact-checking and so on just like real reporters do. I spent hours in the library trying to find the perfect issue for a project I wanted to be A+, but nothing came. I was losing all hope when I noticed the notes of the girl sitting in front of me. They were complex anatomy schemes: she was a med student. Frustrated by my current situation, I did what I rarely do: ask for help. So I tapped her shoulder and asked her about controversial issues in the medical sphere she would like to see debated or brought in the spotlight. Just one, it was for a journalism project. The girl took her time to think about it then handed me a piece of paper with her answer:

Less than 19% of surgeons in this country are women and the percentage drops considerably if we consider specific specialties and women of color. It is a truth universally acknowledged yet publicly denied that women are still overlooked for surgical positions: the fair sex is emotional, tends to get to involved in the medical cases, not to mention potentially hysterical and suffering of that dangerous 'lack of refrain' so well known (?) to their male colleagues. They make better nurses than doctors and better GP than surgeons. 

That was a promising start. I thanked the girl and wished her good luck with her upcoming exam. Actually, I saw that girl a few days later: she passed her exam with flying colors and was now standing by my side at a rally. We became friends and one night, the first night of our senior years we made a pinky promise: a solemn silly pinky promise not to give up no matter what obstacles we will have to face later in our careers. A solemn silly pinky promise to be one day the best journalist and best doctor we could ever be. For ourselves and the others out there.

Well, I'm glad and proud to announce that about fifteen years later, that mystery girl has become the youngest Head of Neurosurgeon in the history of Massachusetts. Daughter of an archeology professor and another legend in the surgical field, Eloise Emery, the Haitian born cardio surgeon who successfully performed the first domino heart transplant on pediatric patients at Mount Sinai Hospital, NY, in 1989, Harper Emery is already exceeding any reasonable expectation. Colleagues describe her as 'headstrong, devoted and passionate, a doctor who would go above and beyond for her patients' while prestigious medical magazines crowned her 'the most brilliant neurosurgeon of her generation”.

At first, I thought that I accepted to write this article because I know Harper Emery and I value and respect her dearly both as a friend and a professional. But that is not completely true.

I accepted to write this article because I know Harper Emery and I know that she will always keep her promise. She already did.

Good luck, Dr. Emery!

Author: Ellen Thompson

Aurora swallowed down the lump threatening to form in her throat: that was the aunt she knew and looked up to basically her whole life. An aunt she thought irremediably lost...but maybe she was wrong, after all. As that realization crossed her mind, her phone beeped. It was a message from...Dr. Trihn? It was a selfie of her new flatmates waiting for her at the cafeteria. They had already bought her a cappuccino and a saved her half donut. Oh right, 'roomies breakfast', she had almost forgotten. She cautiously placed the framed article on her aunt's desk and was about to exit the room when she almost bumped into Harper coming back to her office.

"Gotta roll?" she asked.

"Hm yeah. The new roomies want to grab a coffee together at the cafeteria...I suspect, no I'm afraid that is some kind of a 'shining happy people' ritual" Aurora sighed, hanging her head.

Her aunt chuckled at her reaction to a friendly gesture.

"I'm sure it's not as bad as it sounds." she teased then smiled. "Have fun, Rory!"

The Emery girl nodded, even though she wasn't fully convinced, and picked a set of keys out of her pocket.

"Oh here's the keys and...Aunt Harper? You should hang that article to the wall"

Dr. Emery threw her a quizzical look then joked:

"Because it was written by Ellen? It would certainly give me celebrity points to impress the poor souls visit-"

"No, Auntie, you got it all wrong. Hang it to inspire yourself"

Aurora flashed her a quick confident smile and left the room headed to the cafeteria as Harper met once again the fierce joyful gaze of her younger self smiling back at her behind the framed glass.

[killian-whump]

OUAT 2x12: Rewatch Blog

Wow! It’s been awhile since I’ve done one of these, since it took me forever and a day so long to GIF and post all that whump from the last episode! Really, considering Killian had a bookshelf thrown on him, got beaned in the head with an oar and knocked into the hold of his ship, was beaten viciously with a cane, and then got hit by a car... Well, I think it’s understandable.

But now that’s all done and it’s time for us to watch episode 12 of the second season, “In the Name of the Brother”... Wait, what’s this? Hook’s in the hospital this entire episode? *sigh* Okay, everybody! I’ll see you all next year! ;)

Well, pitifully and hopelessly behind or not, it’s time for another liveblog!

Starting RIGHT where we left off... with Hook in pain and Belle being very, very confused. And Hook in more pain. Haha.

I’ve seen some anti-Hook arguments about how gunshot wounds are so traumatic and take so long to recover from... but I just watched Rumple literally make it “all better” in about five seconds, so I have no idea what that argument was all about. Haha, I forgot he did that, so I just kinda nodded along, like, “Fair point...” but it’s actually not a fair point at all :P

“Hey beautiful!” Hey yourself, beautiful <3

“There’s someone in [the car]!” WELL, I SHOULD HOPE SO. Why is everyone so surprised there’s someone in the car? Do cars regularly drive themselves in Storybrooke? Nevermind. Don’t answer that.

Drinking on the job. Really, Whale?

Oh no... Whale flashbacks. I’ll be honest, I’m not really interested in Whale’s story :/

...I am interested in hot, bloody pirates on gurneys though.

I love how Rumple is in color in these flashbacks, but it just makes me wonder why Whale is in color whenever he visits the Enchanted Forest. Like, shouldn’t he be black and white in their realm if Rumple is in color in his?

And are they going to address the fact that he’s in color?!?!

Suddenly, I’m a little interested in the flashbacks now...

Whoooooa, bad idea, Rumple. I mean, I know what you’re going for right here, but in the world of failed TLKs, this one might be the failiest.

I mean, listen to her scream. WOW. Hard fail. HARD fail.

Well, I always like to segue into a Hook scene by focusing on the handcuffs he’s wearing. It’s, you know, an artistic thing. Very... artsy. Yes. Art.

I love how he’s all grunting and groaning and wincing... and then he spots Emma sitting there and he just freezes like “OH NO. DON’T SHOW WEAKNESS.”

“Again? You’re really into this, aren’t you?” Heehee <3 We all are, baby. Get used to it <3

He’s such a smarmy, adorable little bastard right here. “Chills.”

Okay, but because I’m me, I do have an issue with this scene, and it’s about his left wrist. I get that it’s movie magic and it’s not a real blunted limb. It’s just something to cover Colin’s hand. Fair enough, but why is it SQUARE?? Like, there’s kind of a cube-type quality to it? 

When you inspect it closely, it just looks... square. Like the sides are flat and there’s four corners to it. It annoys me every time I see it.

That said, I do enjoy this scene as a Hook scene and (of course) as a whump scene, but I don’t really care for it in a CS context. I mean, her telling the nurse to hide him was nice, but kind of necessary... but the rest of her actions show a complete and utter lack of care for what’s happened to him. She tells the ambulance crew to let him wait, and then she resorts to torture tactics whilst interrogating him, which - I mean, don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed every blessed moment of it - is kind of not a glowing character trait in general, let alone a promising sign of impending true love. Although, that said, I would be ALL OVER True Love’s Waterboarding if it were a thing. Just saying.

“Guess another passcode” Dave, you bloomin’ idiot. “Well, you do understand that computer hacking and pickaxe hacking are different?” Hahaha, Leroy <3

One of my favorite Rumple lines right here:

“So glad I don’t give a damn.”

So am I, Rumple. So am I. That’s when you’re the most fun to watch :D

LOL Dave... “Dr. Whale, prep for surgery.” Like, who said there was a surgery? Dave, you’re not a doctor. Dave. Dave, listen. Dave...

And Whale’s just walking out like, “Yes. Prep for surgery. What a fantastic idea. What surgery? When is it happening? Who is assisting? Are there even any other doctors on this staff? WHO KNOWS?! Dave said to prep for surgery!”

“Anyone else notice he’s drunk off his ass?” Hahaha, Dave’s look right here. “Uhh... No, I didn’t notice that, honey, but that DOES explain why he totally took my order to prep for surgery when I’m not remotely qualified to give it.”

SAME, Leroy. Hard same on all accounts.

More flashbacks. “How did you get in here? Who are you?”

WHY ARE YOU IN FUCKING COLOR?!?!?

Wait. Wait. Back the fuck up. “Rumple von Stiltskin”????????

RUMPLE VON STILTSKIN?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

What the fuck did I just hear with my own two ears?!?! When? How? Who?!

“A foreigner.” “What tipped you off, my rosy complexion?” OH, SO WE ARE GOING TO ADDRESS THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM. And then drop it like a hot fucking potato. Mm hmmm.

So typical of Rumple von fucking Stiltskin.

LMAO “Are you a philanthropist?” “Well, I’ve been called worse.”

Okay, but where are you going to spend that totally-not-suspicious pile of FULL COLOR gold coins?!?!

I’m just... gonna pretend none of that ever happened.

RUMPLE VON STILTSKIN. Whatever, man. What-ever.

Why is the chipped cup in a display case, though? Like, his entire shop is just full of things on display that aren’t actually for sale. HOW IS HE STILL IN BUSINESS?!??! And where did the von come from?!?!?!

Creepy shit happening... Cora must be arou- Oh, there she is.

Hahahaha “Had hoped you were dead, but hey - disappointment’s just part of life. I’m sure we can agree on that.” LOL, Rumple. VON STILTSKIN.

I am never going to forget this. Or forgive it. Bury me here.

Oh, Cora, you cheatin’ on your boo Hook with Rumple von Stiltskin? Oh, wait. My bad. Mama makes all the rules, and when the pet boy lands himself in the kennel, well, she’s gotta find some new playthings...

Hahahahahahahaha “I’m joking. as far as you know.”

Oh, no... Ger von Hardt has been shot!!! And Vic von Tor has done a runner out the front door! WHAT WILL WE VON DO NOW?!?!?!

“Maybe Doc can do it?” Leroy’s laughter, OMG, hahahahaha, one of the best Leroy moments right here. HAHAHAHAHAHA... NO.

Leroy’s really shining in this episode. Like, he’s only even here to make me like him even more or something. Dave: “[Whale] had his arm ripped off and put back on.” Leroy: “Cool.”

Okay, Cora, I love you, babe, but this is kinda creepy. I mean, you’re sniffing your daughter’s clothes.

Oh wow. This is, hands down, the snazziest hidden underground lair I have ever, ever, ever seen. Regina, your talent is wasted in evil doing and mayoring. Seriously, girl. Get yourself into interior decorating. This is fucking beautiful.

“I think it’s not alright.” Nah, actually on this show, it’s... kinda sorta alright. We really don’t have that high of standards for “alright”ness to begin with, let’s be honest, and even lower ones for parental “alright” behavior.

“Emma and Henry and the two idiots” :D Dave! I think she’s talking about you. Dave! Dave, are you listening? I don’t think he’s listening. Daaaaave.

“Don’t come near me!” LIGHTNING SPEED. “I told you not to- oh, whatever. No one ever listens to me.”

Hahahaha, oh shit. This is gonna go bad. It’s gonna go so bad.

Yep. It went bad.

I love it when Ruby tells people she ate her boyfriend, by the way. It just never stops being hilarious. “Oh, did I mention I ATE MY BOYFRIEND?!”

'Ohhhhhhhhhhh look what I found under my butt!' 'That wasn’t under your butt, it was in my house.' 'But I’ve never been to your house!' 'You were in my house, Mother.' 'No, no, you just keep your car too messy. What’s this?' 'It’s LITERALLY the KITCHEN SINK from MY HOUSE' 'It was under the seat, dear.'

“I was just... stretching my legs. Now I’m gonna go do this thing.”

YEAH. NO IDEA WHY ANYONE WAS WORRIED, WHALE.

NOOOOOOOOO IDEA.

Aw, poor Gerhardt. Ger von Hardt. Neeeever forget.

OH NO, SHE THREW THE CUP OH NOOOOOOO

Oh, wow. Gee whiz, they’re so lucky he didn’t see anything! Wow. That’s so convenient! And so great that Emma knows when people are lying...

Emma’s so done in this scene and I love it, haha.

'We have a long history together so... Yeah, long story short, I’m going to kill EVERYONE HERE if anything happens to Belle.'

“You’re not going to believe what I saw.” Actually, I’m pretty sure she’ll totally believe what you saw, considering you both know magic is real and you came looking for the town and magic wielders in it. Just saying.

ANYWAY... That’s a wrap!

PEW PEW PEW VON PEW!!!! 

[beevean]

So what are your overall thoughts on Forces storywise? Positives and negatives? Where do you think the story ranks in the series?

Maybe it’ll be easier to just list positives and negatives (warning: long post):

Positives:

- Even by watching a low-quality stream of the Switch version, I can say the game looks gorgeous. It does suffer a bit from the Adventure 2 syndrome, where the art direction can bet too dull for you to appreciate the graphics, but some stages are breathtaking. Egg Gate in particular looks amazing.

- While the plot on its own doesn’t belong in this section, I appreciate the simple fact that they actually dared to break from the lighter and softer approach that’s been going on since 2010, and the fact that they remembered that the cast isn’t just made of Sonic, Tails, Eggman, Orbot and Cubot. The concept was awesome! The tone was perfect, serious but not depressing and too try-hard! There was some action! It’s a step in the right direction, and I hope people will criticize the plot for the right reasons and not because “lol sonic shouldn’t try to be edgy”.

- Shadow will be playable. Even if he’s at his core “Sonic with a OP Light Speed attack” this is very important.

- While at first I was annoyed at seeing old levels again, I’m actually happy with what they’ve done. They’re not just rehashes, they’re treated like actual dynamic environments. Green Hill is not just “hey remember this level”, it’s a place dear to Sonic that was ruined by Eggman. Chemical Plant is also ruined and repurposed as a space port, almost like a Sonic CD Bad Future. Only the Death Egg is pretty much the same, although I admit, the Classic level using the same gimmicks as the S3&K version was a nice touch that I forgave because it made sense in-universe.

- The dialogue! Aside from a couple of stupid lines, mostly by Sonic, there was no trace of childish, jarring humor, nobody was OOC or treated as simple comic reliefs, and the interactions between characters were genuine and believable. Some parts kinda reminded me of the Boom cartoon. “See, Infinite, now we het to know each other! So what’s your favorite color? Do you enjoy long, romantic walks on the beach? What’s the source of your powers? You can skip the first two questions if you like” “Maybe he’ll have more friends if he stopped talking about himself in the third person.” (maybe I just have a bad sense of humor idk :V)

- Eggman and Knuckles were perfect. We didn’t see them a lot, but their characterization was on point. Knuckles was just full of charisma and he radiated confidence, a far cry from the butt monkey he’s been since Sonic X. And Eggman was actually smart, with some clever ideas like having backup sources for the Phantom Ruby, rightfully chewing out Infinite for not killing Sonic, and… well, we didn’t see it, but I like the idea of him keeping Sonic alive in his cell just so he could see what happened to the world thanks to his absence (that’s perfect fanfic fuel). And Mike Pollock managed to sound badass in certain parts. “The sun will fall upon you. Boom! The end. Your pathetic lives… are over.”

- Speaking of Pollock, the voice acting was some of the best in the games this far. I can count on a single hand the times someone sounded fake or unconvincing (mostly Silver, sadly, and Sonic was a bit oscillating). I think I gushed about Liam O’ Brien enough, he clearly had so much fun with Infinite. I can’t wait to hear the Japanese version

- And finally I love Infinite way more than I should. His design, his voice (especially his voice

- I like that thing Infinite did in Capital City. You know, when he mind raped everyone in the city by conjuring those abominations of nature. That was a clever use of his powers.

- The last shot of the game, with the Resistance hideout shining under the sun’s light and a single flower at the center, with the instrumental version of the credits’ song in the background, is honestly moving. Even after the huge disappointment that was the ending, this part made me feel satisfied and like I accomplished something (and I didn’t even play myself). It reminds me of Wiosna from Katawa Shoujo, and if you played it you know how it feels to hear that music after finishing a route.

Neutral:

- The scrapping of lives. I’ve seen people complaining that it makes the game too easy, but

1) there’s still some punishment if you lose a life, just like in Unleashed the timer doesn’t reset and of course you lose all your Rings, so if you die you can kiss that S rank goodbye;

2) lives have been pointless since the introduction of save files. Let’s be honest, when was the last time you got a game over in a game that saved your progress? And what was the punishment for a game over? At worst you just have to restart the level you died in.

So while I’m not particularly happy, I’m not disappointed either and I welcome the change.

- The music. I put it here because it’s kind of a mixed bag, there are tracks that I hate with a passion and tracks that I can’t get enough of (and I’ve only heard a tiny fraction of the whole OST). So overall I would say it’s average-to-good. 

I really wonder why they’re insisting of forcing Ohtani to compose whole soundtracks - the guy is seriously talented and I admire his work, but why can’t he be helped by someone else? I know Kenichi Tokoi and Naofumi Hataya also worked on the soundtrack, but afaik their roles are minimal.

- The Avatar himself. I’d enjoy the idea a lot more if 1) they talked, and 2) the characters stopped shilling them just a tiny bit, especially since everyone else was relegated to the background. Still, the concept of a muggle wanting to help the heroes is cool, as it goes against that sort of “elitism” in the Sonic series. And I just grew too attached to Gadget the Wolf :)

- The level design, the thing people trashed for months on end… it’s okay. Is it good as Generations’? Absolutely not. Is it bad? I don’t think so, because when I think “bad level design”, I think of Knuckles’ Chaotix and Sonic CD. 

Forces is inoffensive in this regard. On one hand, it’s not as linear as it looked like, there are multiple paths and some nice platforming sections. On the other, the 3D parts are few, short and in general not that engaging, and yes, Classic Sonic’s stages are supported by too much automation because the physics engine can’t handle him apparently. In short, if you’re okay with shallow fun and you thought Colors was fine, then you’ll be okay with Forces. (and while we’re not supposed to judge the developers as people, considering the level designers were all newbies I’d say they did a good job)

Negatives:

- the fact that you can’t recollect your rings unless you’re playing as the hedgehog Avatar. That just flies against the very core of the Rings concept.

- The sheer lack of “show, don’t tell”. Most of this game is just told, in fact most part of the plot is told via walkie talkie convos. The majority of the cast is just there to comment and guide the characters during the levels, only Silver is shown actually doing something. The most offensive example is how Eggman conquering the world is “shown” by a simple text box (people are already speculating it’s another sign of troubled production). And we don’t even see that much of the conquered world, either, aside from City (no seriously that’s the name of the area).

- What happened to you, Tails? What happened to the boy who wanted to be more than Sonic’s sidekick? Why the mere sight of Chaos 0 sends you into a panic when you fought Chaos 4 before? Why thinking Sonic is dead makes you “lose it”, when the same thing happened twice already (or once, if you want to discard ‘06) and in both cases you were devastated but still managed to kick ass? Why are you just an exposition fairy? Who hates you that much in the writers’ team? :(

- THE. RUSHING. Oh my god I could rant for hours about how the game not only is too fast-paced, but outright misses chunkes. I already mentioned the text box part, but what about the part where Infinite sends Sonic and the Avatar into null space… and they get out of there in literally ten seconds? What about Fake!Chaos and Fake!Shadow being dispatched like that, without even the simples of boss fights? What about Silver, Shadow and Omega just appearing out of nowhere? What about the “fake sun” plan being thwarted simply by the Avatar after less than ten minutes? What about the relentless teasing of Infinite’s origins, all culminating in a big fat nothing (he didn’t even take off his mask for fuck sake)? What about Eggman just vanishing after the final boss? What about the fact that two thirds of the final boss are rehashes, and at this point I’m seriously insulted by seeing Egg Nega Wisp for the third time?

- Going hand-to-hand with the rushed plot, the wasted potential. Sonic gets tortured in isolation, so you’d expect some consequences to his characterization. Nope! Not even a reveal that he was just hiding his fear by acting tough. Why are Shadow, Chaos and Zavok on Eggman’s side? Lol, they were just illusions, the real Shadow is fine and the others just don’t appear. All the cool hints about a tragic past for Infinite in his own song? Nothing mentioned in-game. He’s an experiment, that’s it. The connection with Mania? Just an excuse to justify the presence of Classic Sonic, whose only purpose in the plot is to snap Tails out of his depression. This game is just begging, “Rewrite me, please!”, and if I could write decently I’d do it myself, I’m that disappointed.

- What’s the deal with Aqua Road? It’s the only gimmick level in the game and it looks like the unholy child of those horrible bingo tables in Bingo Highway and this part in Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban for PC.

- Very minor, but if Eggman could see the fake sun, that means he would’ve been incinerated too. Considering how smart he was otherwise, that seems like a huge hole in his plan.

That’s everything I can think of. So, in conclusion, the game is generally good but overall mixed, and I dread the coming of November 7th because I can’t even imagine the kind of reception this game will get (and since it’ll come right after Super Mario Odyssey I don’t think it will sell well :\). 

I would personally play it if I had the chance because the game doesn’t look broken, boring or frustrating, and if I can manage to have fun with ShTH Forces will definitely be entertaining :V but it’s clear something went seriously wrong during the production and it feels like there are bits of the game missing, bits that could’ve elevated the quality from “good” to “excellent” - which is also why I hope Sonic Team doesn’t throw everything away but keeps the good parts and expands on them to create an even better game next time.

So if you’re planning on getting Forces, ask yourself what do you want to see in a Sonic game, because that’s the thing that makes the difference between “it’s not perfect but I can have fun with this” and “this game is absolute trash and Sonic doesn’t deserve this”.

[hipandcriticalblog]

Jamm’s Top 7 Must See Netflix Series

Monday, August 28, 2017 7:50 PM by. Jae Covington (Jamm)

  We are all familiar with the juggernaut streaming service NETFLIX and its mega successful and award winning  series’ like House of Cards and Orange Is The New Black. While these shows are well deserving of all the glory that they have received, there are still a wealth of less recognized series that deserve some of the spotlight  as well. So here is my list of seven essential shows for your viewing pleasure on NETFLIX.

1. Sense 8    Let's start off with the most well known show from the list, Sense 8. The series has been making waves recently due to its fans loud uproar of disapproval following the shows cancellation, right after the release of its second season. But if you take the time to experience this epic sci-fi drama/thriller, you'll no doubt join in on all of the rage.

 Sense 8 introduces the idea that there is a more evolved species of human on the planet called sensates (get sense 8, sensate), with the ability to share memories, emotions, and all senses with other sensates. These amazing abilities combine to make a another one called "visiting". Visiting is kinda like making a projection of yourself directly into someone else's consciousness, something like a hologram. While the premise is enough to bring you into the story, the characters and their interactions with one another is definitely what keeps you engaged. The story revolves around, you guessed it, 8 characters in a cluster (you'll learn about the term from the show) from all over the world. Each character has their own unique background, talents, and personalities which vary greatly from the other characters. Like Capheus, a Kenyan bus driver living in the slums of Nairobi and Nomi, a transgender lesbian hacker from San Francisco.

    The show dedicates itself to exposing the nuance of the lives that the characters live, and introducing that same nuance and culture  to people who would never experience it. It is an extremely engaging show to say the least, full of likable characters, drama, and action. This short summary won't give it its due justice, so you should just experience it yourself.

2.       3%    Now when I first started 3% I had no idea what I was watching and what to expect. But I ended up witnessing a thrilling and thought provoking series that I highly recommend. 3% takes place in a dystopian Brazil, where the mass majority of people live in extreme poverty and in a desolate landscape, where people fight and die over resources like food and water. Meanwhile, a small chunk of the population live in a complete paradise separated from the mainland called "The Offshore".

   The main plot is people from the mainland trying to get to the The Offshore, but the only way to achieve this is through an extreme series of testing simply called "The Process". While the plot was beginning to open up, I thought I was going to get another Hunger Games clone but I was lead into something much more dramatic and thought provoking. 3% is like the Hunger Games however, only a certain amount of people can participate. But unlike Hunger Games however, instead of picking children and teenagers, all participants are 21. Also instead of an all out battle royale, the process includes mental challenges and teamwork in some cases in order to advance.

   This show delivers drama, action, mystery, and even a revenge story pulled together into a single narrative creating a must see series.

3.       The OA    Straight up, this show is weird. Usually, I can predict plot points before they are revealed while watching movies or a new series. This however was not the case for The OA. This series left me full of questions and a deep need to find out what is going to happen after the first season. Fair warning: This show will confuse you, but nonetheless, you should watch it.

   In a nutshell, the show tells the story of a blind girl who was kidnapped, but then years later returns to her hometown, with her vision once more. Unfortunately, if I go any more into detail about the story it would spoil too much...so strap in for this one because The OA will take you on a wild ride.

4.       Ozark    If you love gritty crime shows with rich character building and an intense plot, then welcome to your new favorite show, Ozark. This show grabbed me at the first episode and never loosened its grip on my attention and imagination. The series follows an intelligent Chicago financial advisor Marty Byrd, who is also a money launderer for a huge Mexican drug cartel. The basic premise of the show is based around Marty trying to launder 5 million dollars within a short time frame of a few weeks for the cartel, or the cartel will kill him and his family. The show takes a slow start in the first episode but it makes up for it drastically, with a major increase in tension towards the end of the episode.

 In order to launder this mass amount of money Marty takes his family to Ozark, Missouri, a small country lake town in order to capitalize on the large tourist population during the summer. The show is very reminiscent of Breaking Bad. The difference is this show does right when Breaking Bad starts to fall off. Personally, I started to lose interest in Breaking Bad when Walter White connects to the South American drug lord. The interplay between the two characters didn't really add any more drama to the show and I thought the drug lord played too much of a role in the plot, but with Ozark it's the opposite. Every time you see the cartel after the first episode, it's nothing but intensity. Instead of being always seen the cartel thrives in the background but reappears just enough to stay relevant without overdoing it.

   All in all, this show is simply amazing and I highly recommend it to drama show lovers.

5.       Chewing Gum   Sexual, Awkward, Hilarious, are the words that comes to mind when I think about Chewing Gum. This series takes raunchy comedy to an entirely new level. In its two seasons it has become a comedic masterpiece that is choke-full of truly laugh out loud moments. The story revolves around a young woman named Tracey, that’s trying desperately to lose her virginity despite the rules of her highly religious mother. Now one might think this plot to be simple and easy to overcome, but when you are as awkward and so out of touch as Tracey your idea of simple might change.

    The wild and outrageous situations that she finds herself in in the pursuit of sex are to die for. I must admit though, that not all the jokes land well but those are few and far in-between, and the ones that do hit hard and are memorable and will keep you laughing for minutes on end. What makes this show stand out to me however is the fact that Tracey is black. We really don’t see black women in leading comedic roles, nor do we see them actively looking to engage in sex.

This BAFTA winning series is by far one of my favorites on the air right now. It's refreshing, funny, honest, and truly worth your time to watch.

6.       Grace&Frankie    To keep the comedy wagon rolling next up is this "buddy buddy" comedy that brings "old eyes" on current issues. This series will definitely will be one that will be discussed for years to come, due to how it handles topics like; sexuality, ageism,  infidelity, and family issues. And it only helps that it's funny as well. The best way to describe this story is messy, as it follows two older married couples Grace and Robert and Frankie and Saul whom are all friends via Saul and Robert, who are also partners in their own law firm. Where things get messy is when Saul and Robert both come out as gay and in love with each other and have been over the majority of both of their marriages. So to help each other through the situation that they both found themselves in, Grace and Frankie both move in together to be apart from their ex-husbands. I needed some sanitizer writing this because it gets so messy, as this is just the basic premise of the show.

   But through all of this drama and heartbreak the series still finds the space to fit in plenty of comedy in the mix. Mainly the comedic relief falls on Frankie and hippy like lifestyle as it clashes with Grace's upper class and bourgeois status and sensibility. As stated before, the show really shines by its ability to integrate current topics to older characters, which is very seldom seen in television. I really enjoyed watching both Grace and Frankie trying to re-enter the dating scene after being with one person for over 20 years. The show also does a good job of sharing screen time with all of its characters including the children of both marriages, all of whom are complete individuals and have their own storylines to follow.

   In my opinion, Grace&Frankie is one of the best crafted shows that you will see on television. So if you haven't seen it log on to Netflix and delve right into it, you deserve it.

7.       Black Mirror    This show just might be my favorite thing on the entire Netflix platform. It might even be my favorite television show period. Yeah it’s that good. It’s definitely the most complex show on the list, and no doubt will be the hardest to describe...so let’s just get into it. First off, every episode is different so there is no continuity nor connectivity with each episode, just one recurring theme of how technology has, is, and might affect people and society as a whole. The lack of continuity was confusing at first, because the series gives no indication of it, so I was taken back at first, but the feeling faded as I got into the second episode and beyond.

    The show really plays out like a collection of movies instead of television series, due to the quality of the production and how immersive every episode is. What I truly enjoy about this series is that every episode provokes thought and the feeling of "What if that were to really happen to me/us?". A great example of when I felt this sensation is in an episode where the bee population is so low that a company created mechanical bees to make up for the low natural bee population. The problem however is when someone hacks into the artificial bee's systems and start using them to kill people who are chosen over twitter via people attaching their name to a certain hashtag. The show gets deep and when you are watching it it becomes hard to turn away and remove yourself from your captivation to it.

    I can never do this masterpiece any justice from this short description of it. You just have to immerse yourself into it to truly understand how great it is.

   So that’s it with the list of my top seven must see shows. So take a day or two for yourself, and your favorite binge buddy, grab some snacks, and start checking off the shows on your new watch list.

[wheredidtheyallcomefrom]

The Future of the Trainees (Part 2)

These are just some opinions about the trainees whose position evaluation stages were already aired, their skills and their chances of passing the elimination/making it into the final group. 

If It Was You

Kim Yongguk (Rank 34 -> Rank 35)

Chances – Well, it seems like Mnet doesn’t mind Yongguk going up in ranks because they really focused on him this episode. This is sort of nice because I think it’s always hard for the shier and more introverted people on reality shows to let their personality shine through. They don’t make friends as easily so there’s probably not much footage of them conversing with other trainees and they’re not really the type to ham it out in front of the camera alone. Especially, in Yongguk’s case because he probably didn’t think he’d need to make friends right away since he had his labelmate. And he actually does talk about this in his interviews which is really sweet because he didn’t need to mention him considering that he was out of the competition so very early on. I think Mnet couldn’t predict the ranks that some trainees would get and from their editing in this episode it’s pretty obvious whom they don’t mind being popular and whom they want to go down in ranking. And from their editing of Yongguk I would say that they’re quite partial towards the idea of him going up. I mean they provide sad music over his interviews, they show him practicing for ‘Nayana’ to highlight his progress (I think he’s always been good, it was just probably harder for him when Kim Sihyun left and he didn’t know that he was going to be quite popular), they show the trainers and trainees fall in love with voice. It’s one of the nicest editing anyone’s received on this show – it not only shows that he’s a nice kid but also points out his strengths. Considering all this and the fact that he is very good-looking, there’s a good chance of him receiving a higher rank next time. Yongguk will definitely get into the Top 35 (he’s already in it) and I personally would bet on him getting into the Top 22. However, I don’t think he has much of a chance of getting into the final group just because there are around 20 trainees already fighting for these 11 spots.

Skills – I already knew that Yongguk was a good vocalist and I was surprised that everyone else on the show was so shocked. He was good and stable during his evaluation stage, he was good and stable during the ‘Boy in Luv’ stage which garnered so much attention – how did his (and Gunmin’s skills) fly under the radar? Yongguk did the high note in the latter performance to boot. I guess his vocals do shine through more in a soulful ballad where he is also able to project emotions into his singing. Yongguk’s also a pretty clean dancer although I do think he lacked energy in both of his performances which isn’t terrible or striking. (By the way, Kim Sihhyun is also a good vocalist, I hope that Yongguk gains anough fans for their label to debut them after the program.)

 Joo Jinwoo (Rank 45 -> Rank 42)

Chances – It was nice of Mnet to give attention to Yongguk, it absolutely sucks that they barely gave any to Jinwoo. His rank is pretty consistent but it’s also quite below the cut-off line for the next elimination so that’s not a good sign, especially now that he didn’t really get any screentime in the sixth episode. If he didn’t have the ‘L’ sticker on his shirt, I wouldn’t have even realized that he was the leader – I would’ve assumed it was Yehyun. It’s also Jinwoo’s second time being the leader so I am sure that it was very much deserved, it’s a shame we didn’t get to see it. He is a great vocalist who actually got a chance to showcase that in this evaluation (unlike other less fortunate souls) but the only thing we get to see in practice is Seonglee beating him out of the center position. I think that Seonglee is a better vocalist but I also think that Seonglee is the best vocalist on the show and Jinwoo, while worse, is still better than many. You get to hear that in the performance but I don’t trust netizens to pick up on that without Mnet pointing it out. I have seen that Koreans commented about him under the video of the performance, although they mainly pointed out his looks. It’s nice to see that even the lower ranking trainees are getting attention – it makes me believe that even if you don’t get into the final group and even if the show is terribly biased and extremely stressful for the contestants, it might be beneficial for them in the end. It also helps that Jinwoo is from MMO and, considering Daniel’s and Jisung’s popularity, the label will probably (or at least should) debut a boy group after all this. This is a comforting thought because I really don’t think he will pass the next elimination.

Skills – As I said – he’s a good vocalist. That’s actually what I have written down about him after his introduction video. His voice might not be as explosive as some other ones on this show but I don’t particularly care about that. Jinwoo’s dancing is good for a trainee who wasn’t looking at the position of a dancer in the group.

 Kim Seonglee (Rank 46 -> Rank 51)

Chances – I am not too optimistic about his prospects on the show. Which is a shame because I do think he is the best vocalist this season (completely subjective). His ‘Call Me Baby’ performance had the same effect on me that Yeonjung’s ‘Into the New World’ performance had on me last season. But because a lot of focus was given to Moonbok and Hyunwoo, not many people really noticed him. And this time around a lot of focus was given to Yongguk. We saw that he got the center position and… That’s it. I will give it to Mnet – they did show everyone’s reactions to his last note but it’s just not enough. It’s really frustrating because any time that the camera focuses more than 5 seconds on him, you can see that he is really funny. He waves to imaginary fans during the ‘Nayana’ practice, he hilariously beats his opponent during arm-wrestling, he shows a very honest reaction to the vocal trainer being  more excited to work with the B-ranked kids. People keep saying that the group should have talented members and should have members who are good at variety. Seonglee is both!!! But we just don’t see enough of him for many people to fall for him. I am also going to assume that he doesn’t have his looks going for him (I am terrible at predicting who Koreans are going to find attractive) although I think he is a total bae. And again it’s nice to see that people did comment about him and pointed out that while Yongguk did great he wasn’t the only one. However, he’s probably not gonna pass this elimination and I have no idea what C2K is so I am pretty glum about his debut later on as well.

Skills – I’ve kinda already mentioned his singing twice, but I’m gonna praise it a third time because Mnet’s not doing a good job of it. Seonglee is simply phenomenal. I also would like to point out that he is probably the only one out of the top-tier vocalists this season who actually was A-ranked. And that is because he’s also a good enough dancer. Too bad we’ll probably lose him so early on.

 Kim Yehyun (Rank 40 -> Rank 55)

Chances – Yehyun’s story on this show had actually restored my faith in netizens at some point. Because while you are right to get mad at Mnet for evil-editing and being biased towards certain trainees when it comes to screentime, you also can’t deny that people have eyes and brains of their own. I personally try to pay attention to as many trainees as possible even if they have very little screentime and when I see some kind of drama I don’t let Mnet put ideas in my head – I make my own observations and come to my own conclusions. And the fact that so many people fall so easily for Mnet’s games just confuses me. But with Yehyun I was really proud of netizens. He didn’t get any screentime and Koreans still saw that he helped a lot of trainees in the F rank with dancing (despite not being the best dancer at all), saw that he actually moved up to the C-rank, saw that he was a skilled, hard-working and nice kid. And he went up 59 ranks from the second episode to the third which I though was very deserving (although I am a bit biased because I also really do like his looks – I’m starting to see that Koreans and I have really different tastes). In the last episode he got quite bit of focus in his group, second only to Yongguk. I don’t know Korean but it seems like he studied Musical Theory and basically took control of the rearrangement of the song. I did honestly think he was the leader. You can also tell that he is a really nice kid from the scenes of him talking to Yongguk, he is quick to praise all of the members, quick to reassure, and he always seems so sweet and earnest. I really cannot complain about his screentime this episode. But Mnet did focus more on Yongguk and I don’t know if viewers can focus on two trainees from the same stage who are not in the Top 22. And considering that he also fell since the fifth episode, I feel like he’s probably not massing the next elimination. I am pretty pessimistic about his chances of debuting as well, because I have not heard of Widmay prior to the show.

Skills – I love the tone of his voice even when he is talking. I thought he really lacked in dancing when I watched his rank evaluation but it seems like he is better than I anticipated. He did help the other F-trainees and he did go up to C after the re-evaluation. In ‘Be Mine’ he looked decent but he was also dancing on a hurt foot so it’s hard to judge.

PS. I don’t really care for ballads or ballad performances but even I have to admit that they did beautifully. I understand the comments saying that they are ost-ready.

[andymull]

The WWE Superstar Shake-Up Review - Smackdown Live

After a quick break I present to you the write up of the SD Live side of the superstar shake-up, the slight wait for this brands review has been welcome as things have greatly changed on SD in terms of were people have been slotted and the new feuds that have developed. So with any further wait, wagons roll....

Kevin Owens

The former Universal Champion and current US Champion makes his way to the blue brand, my first thought was that this would be a great move for Kevin in being able to get straight back to the top of the card on SD Live like he was as Universal Champ on Raw but that sadly hasn't developed so far. 

He had the US Title, dropped it to Chris Jericho solely so that Jericho could also move brands, then won it back from him the same week solely so that Jericho could leave to do some touring with Fozzy over the summer. Thankfully he is now in a feud with one of the best guys in the company in AJ Styles and involved in the MITB match, if he wins the briefcase then everything will be roses for him otherwise he faces a longer stay as the secondary title holder which is a waste.

In terms of future feuds for Owens more of Styles is a given, then id love to see feuds with Shinsuke Nakamura, Randy Orton and Luke Harper, the later of which would be much welcome for Harper as it would bring him along alot in development as well as providing fresh matches for Owens.

Charlotte

‘The Queen’ moves over in a swap with Alexa Bliss, she really is the main focus of the company when it comes to the Women’s Division so was a little surprise that they went along with moving her to SD Live. 

The first thing ill say about her move is that I predict alot of turns from her, due to the lack of good opponents and lack of faces. She came in a heel and is now a kind of face working with Naomi and Becky until she gets a title match where she’ll be back a definite heel. Depth is sooo going to be a killer for most of the good women wrestlers, as there is none, so they’ll be stuck feuding with the same people for too long or will get stuck in mini feuds with women who cant lace their boots.

The New Day

Anything new for this group was more than welcomed, after holding the belts for the longest reign in the company to only hosting Wrestlemania and not even being able to get a match there these guys needed something fresh, they needed SD Live.

Sadly for this review there’s nothing to actually....review, as Kofi needed surgery and had to have time off, Woods and his partner welcomed a new addition to their family and Big E, well Big E married a couple, legit.

But now they are back with this week seeing their debut for SD Live, kinda, by appearing Talking Smack with the beautiful Renee Young and Shane McMahon, something ive wanted since they announced the move/ trade as Big E/ Big Wool live with Renee is always great.

Now they are back we sadly cant look forward to the group gaining revenge on The Revival, who in storyline injured Kofi, as they their-selves are also facing time on the sidelines with injury. When it comes to the blue brand we can look forward to them getting ring time and feuds with The Uso’s, American Alpha, The Fashion Police, hell maybe even the Colon’s if the company decide to build them more first with wins and actual character development.

One of the other things I want with this team after the shake-up is to have one of Kofi or Big E to go more into the singles ranks, with the depth issue after the brand split it could be very vital elsewhere outside of the tag division. Let Big E be the one to do so, while still keeping the group together, and have him be a strong beast around the US Title and if things go well give him a chance higher up around the World Title.

Sami Zayn

The man that before the shake-up was the one everyone was saying needed the move the most, lost and under-valued on Raw this would provide a great re-start for him and allow him to show his skills more and move up the card with great crowd reactions. Geez how wrong were fans to get their hopes up for that, just before the move Sami somehow annoyed someone important backstage and was known for being someone who kept yapping on and talking rubbish backstage which quickly became something he had to do on tv, some kind of punishment if you will for something he did no wrong in. 

He’s now seen as someone on this show the same as Raw where whenever he loses he still stays over exactly the same with the fans, so why not have him lose more and put over newer talent. Hence the feud with Boring Baron Corbin and loses to others who needed the odd win, in truth its going to take something big for management to decide to use him in something more worthwhile in making an impact for SD Live and the company overall. I see that being a injury bug affecting 2 or 3 top names possibly and that being the opening he would need for them to strap the rocket to him.

Rusev + Lana

One of my favourite superstars in the company had kind of reached his peak with people on Raw and was stuck losing to Roman Reigns and feuds with Enzo and Cass so again a much needed move, but again he was injured so we dont really have much to go on.

But, saying that we can still asses their plans and lack of follow up on them. Afew weeks back he appeared in a pre tape interview somewhere talking about he deserves a title shot at MITB and would turn up the following week on SD Live to demand it from Shane McMahon. So the new week came and no Rusev, and sign of him since sadly.

My hope is that he returns and gets added to the MITB match and wins the briefcase, then have him destroy Jinder Mahal for the World Title for a huge pop and face turn which would be so fresh and the fans are dying to cheer for him. Have him become an American Patriot after the turn and title win, which will then lead to an awesome feud with Kevin Owens to take back the US Title from the Canadian for Rusev’s adopted America.

The thing I dont get though is the seeming split of Rusev and Lana, she’s been having video packages of her wearing different dresses every week whilst making love to a chair, if they plan on making her a wrestler good luck, otherwise why even bother splitting the pair, its never worked before as they work so well together.

Sin Cara

? 

Seriously.

They realised that Kalisto needed to be on Raw so that he could be included in 205 Live (he still isnt) and to do so they had to come up with someone to bring the other way, and chose Sin Cara, that’s it, no future plans/ideas for the guy, enjoy the few tv appearances you get and jobs you have to do fella.

The Shining Stars

Straight away lets make it clear that they dropped the Shining Stars name and have gone back to just calling them The Colon’s, good move, dropped the time share gimmick, good move, had them debut and attack American Alpha, good move.......Just nothing more since then?

Don’t get me wrong I dont expect them to be the champions instantly as they need ALOT of work to reinvigorate them and make them a solid and believable threat for the fans. Its just that after a solid start to do so they have done near enough nothing with them which is really disappointing as both are very solid wrestlers and can be very useful. I guess the spot of developing a team into a bigger threat has gone to Breezango at the moment, so imagine they will be re-focused on in a month or two’s time possibly?

Jinder Mahal

Now this, this is the reason ive delayed this piece, imagine how stupid I would have looked reviewing his trade straight after the shake-up as a jobber moved over to take loses and that’s it...............and he is now World Champion, yeah that’s right.

The real story at hand here is that the company are moving into the Indian market more this year, with a tour in the last quarter of the year and needed to focus on an Indian talent to help them move into the market easier. They dont have much in the way of options when it came to that requirement so Mr Mahal was, well, ‘it’. A quick unwarranted push as well as a quick title win with his new cronies the Singh Brothers, as well as the rumour that he will be inline for a long title run. 

This really brings Smackdown down in being taken seriously, but at the same time we all want new people focused on and given the big opportunity or rocket, its just that this wasn't the guy we wanted was it, but still we should give him the time to see if he improves and runs with the ball. Then, I dont mind shitting on his run after a month or two if its just boring promo’s and poor matches/ feuds.

Good luck to the guy’s that have to work with him and try to carry him to something good, as long as he fails epic-ally he will shoulder the blame for it.

Tamina

Really not sure how she has survived in the company for so long, even with her father being Jimmy Snuka she has in no way warranted keeping her job for so long. She debuted in 2010, yeah that’s right, now how many great matches or great feuds can you name her being in???????

Poor wrestler, has been inured a fair few times, cant talk on the mic, was kept off of tv for a long time while her father was taken court then passed away, now she has been brought back as part of the Welcoming Committee (poor poor name) and you’ll soon notice who gets to stand at ringside most weeks without wrestling again, yeah stealing a living, Tamina

Byron Saxton

Near enough the same as David Otunga, employed in this position because of his skin colour, extreme lack of talent for the announcing position, he fulfills other roles in the company and should be doing those off camera and not wasting a seat at the announce booth. In a company that employs Nigel Guinness and Steve Corino there should be zero space for Saxton/Otunga/Booker/Percy Watson.

Overall SD Live won the shake-up in comparison with Raw by a mile, its just that they have handled alot of the picks badly, in trying to reshuffle their brand after losing names they seem to have slotted people completely wrong. As ive mentioned before I like seeing them giving opportunities to fresh wrestlers to see what they can do and of they can make a big impression over some of the long standing main eventer’s, but we shouldn't just be forcing those new talents who are’nt ready into those positions.

Nakamura being called up as well is a HUGE move for the brand, as well as potentially picking up another 2 or 3 of the top talents there in NXT would help do wonders for them, as long as they get used correctly that is, which sadly is now a big factor.

In talking about NXT and their top prospects I think that’s the next article ill be approaching and looking at the top 5 that should be getting the call up next.

Hope you've enjoyed my reviews or at the very least hated them with valid reasons, hit me up @AndyMulligan on Twitter and let me know

Bye for now

Andy

[thedamiansmith]

We gotta see the Penguin: Origin 3 player ratings

QLD  1. Billy Slater – is simply all that and a bag of crisps. Brilliant. Hopefully Darius Boyd was sitting at home, scribbling notes about how to be a good fullback.

2. Valentine Holmes – 3 great finishes for tries. Still looks more nervous under the bomb than Dresden circa 1945. It took NSW 210 minutes of football to figure this out. Laurie Daley – supercoach.

3. Will Chambers – obviously in the team as some attempt to keep the game fair. Constantly got in the way. In the way of NSW, in the way of his team-mates, in his own way...

4. Michael Morgan – remember Harvey Keitel’s character in Pulp Fiction? The Wolf? That’s Morgan.

5. Dane Gagai – my pick for player of the series going into the game, the judges agreed. Who signed him again? Oh that’s right.

6. Cameron Munster – there were some question marks over whether Munster was going to be up to the job. These people are not familiar with Craig Bellamy’s Jurassic Park style cloning facility where he spliced Billy Slater’s DNA with that of some kind of football playing frog. Queensland uh uh uh finds a way.

7. Cooper Cronk – dropped the ball when about to score a certain try, so there’s that. Also put in one of the greatest attacking kicks in the history of attacking kicks. So there’s that.

8. Dylan Napa – did his job I guess? He plays for the damn Roosters, what do you want from me? Still looks like Jake Busey.

9. Cameron Smith – nothing needs to be said.

10. Jarrod Wallace – it’s always special when a prop scores a try, especially because it’s nearly universally some sort of cosmic accident when it happens. Started grinning like Hodor when he saw the tryline wide open. Good for him.

11. Gavin Cooper – there’s probably some joke I can make about barrel making but it’s late.

12. Matt Gillett – punishing in defence and attack. The best a man can get indeed.

13. Josh McGuire – There’s a lot of Dishhead Dowling in McGuire and that’s either a backhanded compliment or a cloaked insult. I can’t tell which. Runs hard, tackles hard, gets himself hurt, a bit Martin Lang as well.

14. Ben Hunt – was wisely kept off the field until the game was wrapped up.  A very shrewd move by coach Walters, we know what this guy is capable of in crunch moments.

15. Josh Papalii – like The Rock if The Rock ate another The Rock.

16. Coen Hess - ‘Rudolf’ as I’ve come to call him is just as brutal and efficient as his namesake. Too far?

17. Tim Glasby – when he got the ball on the half volley and started trundling for the try line we were all thinking it: is this the next Danny Nutley? Unfortunately Glasby doesn’t have the Nuts turn of pace. Ask me some time about the time Danny Nutley was the second leg in a double at the SFS…

NSW

1. James Tedesco – you know that ad that he’s in where he sets off the museum alarm system and then sizes up the security before the screen cuts to black? The end of that is that he trips in the first three seconds and then spends the next 45 minutes being beaten in a back room with a phone book before being sold off to work in the engine room of a Yakuza operated black ops whaling vessel...this analogy has gone too far but you see what I’m getting at. The guy’s a muppet.

2. Brett Morris – I never, ever thought I would see the day when Brett Morris was far and away the best player on a NSW team. Next thing you know Donald Trump will be President.

3. Josh Dugan – I’ve been hard on Duges for a long time, but that’s only because I want to see him develop. After my criticism of his last game he did in fact learn how to pass. Only it was forward and to a Queenslander, but baby steps. Shine on you crazy diamond.

4. Jarryd Hayne – remember in 2009 when Hayne was the best player in the comp? Let’s all remember him for the player he was and not the abomination he has become. The Michael McIntyre of rugby league.

5. Blake Ferguson – when Valentine Holmes went over the top of Fergo for his third try you could see Blake gesturing to his team as if to say ‘it’s not my fault – I didn’t pick me’.  Daley should have trusted his judgement.

6. James Maloney – how this jackboot dilettante won two premierships is beyond me and has forever tarnished my enjoyment of rugby league both as a sport and a concept. The best microcosm of his career was late in the game when the Blues were trailing but still in the game and Jimmy put in a pinpoint kick – to Alfie Langer.

7. Mitchell Pearce – Pearce again astounds me with his incredibly accurate kicking game. It was somewhere near the 30th minute before he missed a Queensland back and accidentally found the turf. Otherwise he was like the Legolas of picking out the QLD backline.

8. Aaron Woods – like Styx or Warrant or any other 80’s hair metal band – a crushing lack of talent and ability disguised by a flowing coiffure.

9. Nathan Peats – let’s remember that time when his father, Geordi Peats, played in Canterbury’s 1993 Minor Premiership team…

10. Andrew Fifita – more like Andrew FiFATa. Yeah that’s what I’m going with. A real flat track bully, looks great when things are going his way, a useless thug when they’re not. Won’t turn a game that you’re losing, just helps you win more. Ran for more than 800m, which is something, however only 12 of them were forward.

11. Boyd Cordner – seeing this man in a Blue jumper is inspirational. I mean if he can become captain of the NSW Origin team then I might just have a chance as well. Crippling ankle injury and all.

12. Josh Jackson – to quote Andre 3000 ‘Sorry Josh Jackson. I am for real. Never s’posed to make the Blues side, you’re the one who’s getting penalised’

13. Tyson Frizell – More like Tyson Fizzle. Amirite?

14. David Klemmer – If the players in this Origin series were the cast of Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark then David Klemmer is the bag of sand used to weigh down the trap. A heavy, amorphous mound that is ultimately unable to perform the one simple task it was given.

15. Wade Graham – kinda like Joe Pesci in Casino, well meaning but his volatile temper makes life worse for everyone.

16. Jake Trbojevic – He still goes alright. Could possibly trade some of his consonants for some of Josh Papalii’s vowels.

17. Jack Bird – the year is 2008 and thanks to Family Guy season 7, episode 2 ‘I Dream of Jesus, everyone is talking about how the bird is the word. Well it’s 2017 and the Bird is definitely no longer the word.

[peggyobrennan]

Identity Crisis Summer 2017

The world has twisted since this picture taken at National Rainbow Gathering last year, and so have I.

A deep depression has taken hold, even though I’m back on Cymbalta for it. I start therapy tomorrow, so let’s hope there’s at least no harm...

I must open up, in hopes there are hopes.

I tried writing about it, gonna share.

I called it: Identity Crisis Summer 2017:

So much irony having an identity crisis because I've come Home and am living with Family (blood, not Chosen). But I individuated so very very strongly, and then some. Ran away age 14, came back at 15. Ran away age 26, came back age 30. Ran away last spring, came back now. Moved to the other side from family of Rock Creek Park (after months in the mountains) to raise my kids in a diverse community, against Dad’s wishes, and ...I dunno, was he right? After age 10 they had a less privileged upbringing, which turned profoundly underprivileged, and now the side effects of poverty haunt us.

More irony is that there are facts of my existence that are very unusual, yet I feel nothingness, emptiness, clear vast blank, which is sometimes euphoric but mostly terrifying.  I have rare traits, and I didn't fabricate them. Like I birthed twins, accidentally concieved but profoundly WANTED, and their dad was/is a sh*t. He did things that would be impossible in the age of social media, even tho I understood we had an open marriage. Use your imagination.

I have the drive that artists have, yet the unmotivated state of a depressive.

One of my beloved musical partners said a year ago, “Oh, are you just gonna do Walkabout?” and my answer was YES, sincerely, but I kept letting my non-shine-ity hold me back. And I got wrapped up in some dreamtime, sorta. I DID go many many miles and have lots of adventures and see scads of sights. Then NYC in April/May was kinda painful, cuz I THOUGHT I could do the job at the lovely Ganas Community, but they let me go and my poverty mentality grabbed their offer of  “Sure take the whole paycheck, but be gone if so” (it's more complicated) and I regret that, MAYBE.

Maybe not, cuz my daughter DID get deep strong benefits from Mom being Home. Until we clashed last week when I got profoundly triggered and alienated her. (Which would explain Strong Sadness) Prayers requested for HER healing, which'll overflow to US.

IS there such a thing as a Healer who loses her sh*t, gets profoundly triggered and alienates her beloveds? Why yes, every shaman I know personally (and there are many) does that. But I then doubt my healing abilities. The Wounded Healer is a real thing but your own healing should have actually happened! Mine has, but I guess I'm in relapse.

Yet, last Solstice, 3 weeks ago, the circle I was part of insisted on my priestessing some of our process, and I did it. And my daughter lovingly attended with me, and she knew the Spiritual Giant Women who were in the circle since her childhood. That is good, deeply good.

Then on our way out that beloved young woman said I was like “comic relief for the circle”, a jester's role that sometimes (frequently) works for me. But does that mean I was justified in reading about Pierrot's Columbine's and Harlequin's poly triad (my take) for HOURS the other day, learning way more than I can use about jesting, and dreaming more?!? I don't know. I sure do love learning and exploring. And dreamtime.

Also on our way out of Solstice ritual my daughter called her twin brother to describe our antics. The wondrousness of shamanic dancing. I THINK she was telling that, but I have Selection Bias, though I KNOW she was delightfully recalling.

He wasn't there because 1)it's a women's circle, not my choice originally 2)he insisted there is no such thing as spirituality, though I would love him to argue that I've also got THAT wrong.

He, my beloved son, called me last Saturday, after I spent Friday night in the hospital. He showed his philosophical bent and worked to reassure me that everything is ok, bless him (oops). He Stood Up for Mom. See, my siblings? This is an excellent young man. Period.

They'd been recommending surgery, which is always to be avoided. I have a complicated medical history that is disgusting and infuriating to hear. So I'll spare you, even though it matters for this. Most pertinent NOW is that the red streaks radiating from the (internal) wound are gone and the pain is too. And more surgery would undoubtedly cause more adhesions which started this whole thing, besides incompetence of medical professionals. See my performance piece entitled A Scar Is Born, with the happy face ending. It isn't online; hopefully someday. I waver between open book and discretion. Frustratedly. Of course I would benefit from a manager and an agent.

I am in limbo of sorts. I have deep friends, and also am “getting the word out”, and the fact is, I use social media a lot. If it isn't interactive, social media can be mentally harmful. Sez I and others.

Home? Hometown? My family of origin has rejected me harshly, mostly in those microagressive ways, but more. Attempting to have my children removed and put in foster care in 2006, and other outrageous treatment of my children and me. Cousins and extended family are quite decent and loving. One must mention the mental illness of my older sister, who fixated on me (and mine) or decades, wrangling other family against me. Though it began very young, that's over now.

Part of my family's rejection might come from the fact that I am not straight. I was born with the bisexuality. It's true that I wouldn't have had to act on it, even though I already had at age 7, and then how about this one: I truly am gender nonconforming. I was in a theatre play at at the age of 12 in which I played a man, so maybe that's to blame, but I was always been told to be more ladylike, and only with the recent freedoms granted have I not had massive angst about clothing. Instead I've been doing drag surreptitiously for over 3 decades. At an all girls camp, one must have “drag”, teehee. The girl who played the (cross dressed) lead was stunning and talented and I had a big crush. Didn't recognize it for what it was. Nowadays I would have been allowed to. A few weeks ago I was in line at a pharmacy and the person behind me didn't think I was moving fast enough, so they said “Ma'am? Uh, sir? Erm. There's a space in front of you.” Just a few days ago at the hospital my attending physician asked if I was sexually active, immediately following with “Male? Female? Both?” to which my easy answer was “Both”. Because she offered me that option and it is truth. Before our recent liberations, I would have had to quickly discern how to honestly answer, so as to not offend the doctor and stay pertinent to the case. MY gender and sexuality are twisted together, but please know that they are not the same thing. Always the activist, another problem of mine...

More reason to not feel nothingness: I'm a recovering alcoholic addict, and the stats are low for longterm recovery. Another rarity. I have become a sort of 12 Step Junkie, so I have that indoctrination of  “A day without ____ is a productive day”, but... it rings hollow too much, so YAY for all the other tools. Like not isolating and having a network of people, but ironically I am only speaking with one or two f2f. Depression is contagious; gods forbid I bring it on you. My latest are NarAnon but the Most Useful is Underearners Anonymous. Here's how I'm not gonna break the 11th tradition: I know people in those programs, and I did not say I was a member. This is the 1st time I've ever even come close. My intense fear of doing a wrong thing is probably at play here.

Furtherly ironic is me not playing music with others, or at all; more of the self-destruction of depression. Until yesterday, I hadn't picked up my guitar in 9 days, practically a CRIME for a string player. One benefit of being in my home city COULD BE the network of musical connections that I truly developed here. Just a few years ago there were several public events where when I showed up without my instrument, I got scolded. But I need Right Livelihood, and there are many factors that have made music not my livelihood.

Yet I still am having a massive identity crisis. And having the classic symptoms of depression, Very Low Motivation, confusion, sadness, indecision, vicious cycles of ill health due to lack of self care, because... what's the use. It is significant that I went for medical care the other day and fortunate that I did. I will never suicide; I could not do that to my kids.

I am researching grad school to get a master's in psychology and become addictions counselor, hopefully utilizing my BA in studio art, my musical core, my jesterly nature, and my initiation as shamanic healer. Attempting research while wasting time, cuz I aint worth the effort, and having fabulous sammiches.

Obviously I am also hyper-graphic, compulsive with many things, and am knowingly using the hour of Good Mood that follows Morning Coffee to write this. I'm also considering full time work for a friend's Green Company, secretarial stuff. I do hope they actually noticed how genuinely butch I am, and heard me when I said grad school is likely in my near future.

Anyway, idletime is for the birds. Though I'm tremendously grateful for the Soft Landing that my auntie is providing for me here in NW DC. I just wish I wasn't living alone, but a beloved cousin has invited me to her beautifully crowded house in Bethesda for grad school time, and we're talking.

This beautiful picture of Rainbow Gathering 2016 feels worlds away. In many ways, it is. But I myself took it, and I was there. Sincerely. Just because the Spirit Names I have been given didn't stick, and I look like a Failed Soccer Mom with the S.A.D. Diet to strangers (deformed belly with that old wound, & authentic Nighttime Binging Disorder, please don't shoot me), doesn't mean I don't have relevant vital depth and value.

Depression sucks. It killed many members of my family and it's not gonna take me.

I'm just changing, and seeking. I was a performance artist, I was an illustrator, painter, my writing has been published, I will always be a musician, even if I believe people who consider females incapable of that, eff that. I am a multimedia artist. I put on an excellent concert 10 days ago. I had a visual art exhibition 16 months ago. I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and goldangit I handled the weirdest election in US history in a coal town, worked their general store, then worked in another pretty-well-integrated-with-mainstream commune (my preferred lifestyle, attempting freeganism, seriously) in NYC and … I'm gonna figure out how to tell these tales. And integrate them with my life.

[cover32-yahoopartner-blog]

Colin Kaepernick; the bad guy with a philanthropic side

Colin Kaepernick can’t seem to find a job these days. In just four short years Kaepernick has gone from an exploding supernova across the NFL galaxy and winning an ESPY for breakout athlete of the year, to finding himself unemployed and described as a traitor.

The year is 2017 and persona non-grata numero uno is none other than Kaepernick. Why is this? How did a man who graced the covers of Sports Illustrated, highlighted the body issue and lit up the ESPYS fall from such great heights?

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The topic of the current status of Kaepernick came up for discussion on NFL Network’s Up to the Minute, with the panel weighing in:

“The coaches and general managers that I’ve spoken with they believe he’s asking for 10 million, not saying that’s what he’s actually asking for but that’s what they think and that’s a hefty price. . .Certainly does not seem he will have the opportunity to start anywhere. . .Kaepernick’s plan going into free agency, just relax a little bit and kinda let the market come to him. He didn’t expect to be one of those guys signed at 4pm Thursday March 9 when the league year opened.” — Ian Rapoport

“I think it’s a mixture of Kaepernick not being able to play the style of certain teams, some teams just not wanting to give him an opportunity to go with some other guys. . .Again let’s not kid ourselves his political stance and the attention that he could bring will factor into some teams decision on whether they will or won’t bring him to their team.” — Steve Wyche

Mike Garafolo would reference a comment made by Raven’s coach John Harbaugh, “Stupid and intellectually lazy to think he’s being blackballed only because political stuff. Garafolo would also add some intrigue, “Guys across the league, coaches and general managers, still believe he has talent. . . behind the scenes has enough talent to be a threat on offense.”

Kaepernick does indeed have plenty of talent left. In 2016 Kaepernick put up the second best QB Rating of his career (90.7) despite playing 11 games on a bad 2-14 football team, while finishing the season with 2,241 yards, 16 touchdowns, four interceptions, a 59.2 completion percentage and 69 rushing attempts for 468 yards and two touchdowns.

Below is a table of how Kaepernick stacked up against the other non-16 game starting quarterbacks in free agency.

Current Status or Team

Free Agency

Chicago Bears

New York Jets

New York Giants

Quarterback

Colin Kaepernick

Mike Glennon

Josh McCown

Geno Smith

Win-Loss Record as a Starter

28-30

5-13

18-42

12-18

Touchdowns- Interceptions

72-30

30-15

79-69

28-36

Passer Rating

88.9

84.6

78.2

72.4

While the last two years have been abysmal for Kaepernick, having only won three-of-16 games, it would be unfair if the the absolute dumpster fire that the San Francisco 49ers’ organization as a whole has been, wasn’t factored in. Between unqualified rookie head coach, Jim Tomsula, Chip Kelly refusing to play him, injury and a bad roster, Kaepernick hasn’t had many opportunities to shine. For all the knocks on his ability to read defenses and the entire football field, his best production came in 2013 and 2014, when being asked to throw the ball more than 400 times.

In 2016, Kaepernick was tied for being sacked the fifth most times in the league behind an absolutely atrocious offensive line. Of the quarterbacks sacked equally or more often, only Andy Dalton, Andrew Luck, Sam Bradford, Matt Ryan, Matthew Stafford and Russell Wilson bested his 90.7 quarterback rating in 2016; while Cam Newton, Philip Rivers, Carson Palmer and Tyrod Taylor all would finish the season with an inferior rating.

Free Agency is five weeks old and Kaepernick still remains unsigned. He is arguably the most talented and accomplished quarterback allowed to enter free agency this year. In 2013, after a lengthy power outage, he engineered a huge comeback and was five yards away from tossing a Super Bowl clinching touchdown pass. Geno Smith being signed before Kaepernick can be seen as a major slight, as it is difficult to not imagine Smith having his jaw broken over $600.

So for all those who would like to believe it’s not collusion from the NFL owners, below are a few more P.G. examples as to why Kaepernick is not yet employed.

The point here, I think, is once teams decide they don't want someone, they come up with plenty of reasons to try to justify the decision. https://t.co/w1jewivDmV

— Matt Maiocco (@MaioccoNBCS) March 31, 2017

You have got to be kidding me. Next reason teams will use: he prefers Star Wars over Star Trek.

https://t.co/0LXzzhrzhD

— mike freeman (@mikefreemanNFL) March 31, 2017

Perhaps it’s something darker. Maybe it is collusion; maybe it’s an unspoken rule between front office and ownership circles. Bleacher report’s Mike Freeman touched on this in an article back in August of 2016.

Mixing sports and politics is always a bad idea and should be avoided at all costs, but in this instance it cannot be helped. Kaepernick is cognizant of growing tensions in America, along with the alarming frequency of African-Americans continuing to end up dead without receiving justice. In choosing not to stand for the pledge of allegiance, Kaepernick chose this moment to become active.

“Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.” — First Amendment.

Our forefathers dreamed a place where they could make America great for the first time. The First Amendment guarantees many protections, but it doesn’t grant us the freedom from public opinion and outcry. Social media’s influence on our daily lives continues to grow stronger and stronger. Ten days ago the President of the United States of America spoke on Kaepernick at a rally in Kentucky.

A stark contrast from the viewpoint of the forty-fourth POTUS.

Kaepernick has been criticized for publicly ending his national anthem protest and called disingenuous, a fraud and a phony. He’s been accused of selling out the validity of his protests because he needed a job and his revolutionary image continues to take an unjust beating.

Offering my opinion, continuing to take a knee is no longer necessary to do. The protest wasn’t meant to be a never-ending event and I would say after a year of Kaepernick’s protest, his message has gotten across. It does look suspect as hell when he decided to end his protest at roughly the same time he opted out of his deal with the 49ers, but just because he stopped taking a knee doesn’t mean he’s stopped his philanthropic efforts.

Know Your Rights Camp, is a free campaign for youth fully funded by Kaepernick to raise awareness on higher education, self empowerment, and instruction to properly interact with law enforcement in various scenarios. It’s goal is to help build a stronger generation of people that will create the change that is needed in this world.

March 21, 2017, shortly after the President’s proposed budget gave the impression it was cutting funding to Meals on Wheels, Kaepernick sprang to action with a $50,000 donation.

March 17, 2017, Citing impending famine, drought, politics, inaction of non-government organizations and lack of media attention, Kaepernick convinced Turkish Airlines (the only airline traveling from the United States to Somalia) to donate an airplane for him to fill with food, water and supplies to take to Somalia. Working in tandem with Ben Stiller’s Stiller Foundation, Kaepernick set up a Gofundme account Love Army for Somalia and raised a million dollars in aid.

Kaepernick was awarded the 49ers’ prestigious Len Eshmont Award by his teammates. The award is given to an individual who “best exemplifies the inspirational and courageous play of Len Eshmont,” an original member of the 1946 49ers’ team.

Speaking on being named the award recipient, Kaepernick had this to say:

“It’s very impactful, and I think they are people who have very strong character. . . And to have the ability to really recognize what’s going on, how it not only affects them, but it affects their families and affects other people that look like them, is something that’s very powerful and I’m very happy to have teammates like that, that have that type of character, that have those type of ethics and humanity.”

November 22, 2016, Kaepernick announces he will donate $1 million of his jersey sales towards helping organizations that can assist troubled communities. On his website Kaepernick7.com, Kaepernick has a section dedicated to tracking all of his charitable donations.

My final thoughts; there is no easy way to inspire change. There will never be a way that massive societal change will commence without people being shocked outside of their comfort zone. Being ostracized for his protests is one thing, but with all the work Kaepernick is doing in communities what negative attention could he bring? Can he still play another down is another question altogether, but until his offensive weaponry is no longer NFL-caliber worthy, it would be unwise to write him off. Maybe it’s because he’s going to be 30 this year, but wait, Tom Brady just won the Super Bowl at 39 and says he’s got 6-7 years left in him; so age can’t be the factor.

Whatever the reason may be, what Kaepernick is doing off the field is being lost on and discredited by an awful lot of people. What and who the NFL chooses to vouch for has become increasingly more vague in this day and age. For an entity as influential as the NFL, they are missing an opportunity to act in their own best interests. The majority of NFL players and superstars alike, primarily come from low-income areas that experience many of the same issues that Kaepernick is speaking out against. The pledge of allegiance is sacred in this country and the First Amendment is clearly subjected to censorship.

— Philip Robinson writes for cover32 and covers the NFL and the Pittsburgh Steelers. He can be followed on Twitter @chocP3thunder.

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