#but i just don't like where these movies are going anymore

[yuujispinkhair]

ILLICIT AFFAIRS

You show me colors I can't see with anyone else

You are stuck in an unhappy marriage, not brave enough to leave your cheating husband. Until you meet Sukuna.

Pairing: Modern!Sukuna x Reader (female) Word Count: 10k Warnings: 18+, fluff, hurt/comfort, smut, but not explicit, cheating (Reader's husband cheats on her, and later on, she cheats on him with Sukuna). Sukuna is a CEO (or can be read as a Yakuza boss, too). Sukuna + Reader are both in their thirties. The fic title is taken from Taylor Swift's "Illicit Affairs", but in this story, the secret affair has a happy ending. This story is super self-indulgent, but I hope some of my fellow Sukuna lovers will enjoy it, too! Minors don't interact. Divider @./lovwoung

You often ask yourself what went wrong. How did you end up trapped in this unhappy marriage? Maybe you were too young, too inexperienced, too naive when you met your husband. Maybe you were too insecure, convinced no one would ever want you, and so you gratefully settled for the first man who showed interest in dating you.

Your relationship was never like those romances you knew from books or movies, but you assumed that was just how things were in reality. Your mom, your aunt, and everyone else told you how lucky you were to have finally found a man willing to be with you. How lucky to have found someone with a good job and from a good family. They were also the ones who pressured the two of you to get married, and ever since then, things have gone downhill.

Your husband hasn't shown you any love or affection in years. The only time he shows interest in you is when he wants to have sex, but even that is without any real intimacy. He hasn't kissed you in years, and if he did at this point, you would probably be disgusted by it. There is no love in this marriage.

The worst thing is you know he is cheating on you. You already suspected it when he suddenly had to stay at work a lot longer than usual and when he began to hide his phone screen from you. And then one night, you woke up and walked into the kitchen to get a glass of water, and that's when you overheard your husband talking on the phone with some other woman calling her angel and baby and telling her how beautiful she was.

Even though you didn't love him anymore, it still made your world tumble down around you.

You want to leave him, but you can't. Everything is too much, too overwhelming. You have always found it very hard to make decisions, and this one is huge. You have no idea where to go or how to get by on your own. All your savings went into buying this apartment, and now what?

And it's not just the financial aspect that worries you. Everyone has always told you that you would never survive on your own. They always kept you small, turning you into someone who is dependent on others. You got told that you are weird, not good enough, and incapable of ever taking control of your life. And at some point over the years, you started to believe that. Your self-confidence is non-existent.

You tell your mom about the cheating, and she tells you to stay with your husband.

"It's just a little fling. At least you are lucky that he doesn't want to divorce you. It would be such a financial disaster, and you know how you are. You don't do well on your own. Just stay with him and find joy in other things. Maybe pick up a new hobby. I could give you Kira's number. She just joined a nice Yoga class!"

You don't go to the Yoga class, but you also don't leave your husband. You try to pretend everything is fine. Try to gaslight yourself into thinking that maybe you are really just a hysterical, insecure, and overjealous idiot who misinterpreted things.

The months pass, and you catch him flirting on the phone several times. An annual business event is scheduled, which you always accompany him to, but he tells you it got canceled this year. Only to find out from the wife of one of his coworkers that the event took place as usual, but you and your husband simply never showed up. You know why. He didn't want you there. He didn't want to risk his little affair and his wife running into each other.

You've given up on love by now. You hate seeing ads for romance novels or rom-coms. You stop listening to music because most songs are lovesongs. For all you know, romantic love is just a made-up thing that people sing about and write about, but it's all just lies.

Or maybe it does exist in real life. But not for you. Maybe you simply aren't the type of woman who deserves to be loved. Maybe your mom is right, and you should just accept it.

So you stay with your husband, but you are dead inside.

Until you meet Sukuna.

He is everything you ever dreamed about in your secret fantasies that you started to develop to comfort yourself. A dreamed life, but now it's right in front of you, close enough to touch. Sukuna is a real gentleman. An attractive mix of a bad boy and a successful, serious businessman. Smart, confident, and sexy, with a boyish playfulness beneath his professional appearance.

Ironically, you meet him the night you try to save your marriage.

You are already sitting at the table for two you booked for a date in one of the best restaurants in the city. You put on makeup and spend an hour picking a dress in which you feel at least half attractive. And now you sit here, sipping your red wine, waiting for your husband to arrive, to hopefully bond with him again over a delicious dinner and a few hours where you can talk and maybe laugh together.

Only that your husband never shows up. You have already finished your first glass of wine and received several pitiful looks from the waitress when your phone buzzes with a message. It's your husband telling you he can't make it. "Something has come up at work. I don't know when I will be able to leave. Just have dinner without me."

You stare at the message for far too long, not even knowing how to respond. Feeling utterly humiliated, utterly hurt, and abandoned. Worthless. You know he is going to see his girlfriend instead tonight. His girlfriend, who is young and sexy, and can give him what he wants.

And suddenly, you can't hold back the tears anymore. You blink hastily, wiping angrily at your cheeks, trying everything not to ruin your makeup or have a breakdown in the middle of the crowded restaurant. But the waitress chooses that exact moment to walk up to you with an overly bright smile, asking,

"Excuse me, Madam. Would it be alright if someone joins you at your table?"

You look at her, caught off guard, really not wanting a stranger at your table in this horrid moment, but you are too polite to say no, and so you smile weakly back at her, pressing out in a tear-thick voice,

"Of course, I don't mind."

You wipe your eyes again, trying to will the tears away, as a tall man in a fancy-looking black suit and slicked-back pink hair comes into view. He is snapping at the waitress, clearly annoyed, saying something about how rude it is to forget his reservation and that this will have consequences since he is a regular customer, etc.

But he sits down across from you, still fuming as the waitress bows deeply several times, apologizing profusely for the mistake, promising that the man's food and drinks will be free tonight.

He lets out an exasperated sigh and orders a glass of red wine, which the waitress immediately scrambles to get for him.

You gulp hard, trying to regain composure, hoping you don't look as forlorn as you feel. You lift your head to nod at the man across from you, trying to muster up a polite smile because, after all, you have been trained from a young age to always be friendly.

You take him in and draw in a surprised breath. He is gorgeous. The most attractive man you have ever seen. Tall and broad-shouldered with masculine but beautiful features. Angular jawline, intelligent maroon eyes, and sensual lips that are lifted in a smug smirk as he nods back at you,

"Excuse this inconvenience. I will make sure whoever is responsible will get fired."

And, of course, you splutter and are quick to try doing damage control, not wanting some poor person to lose their job over this.

"Oh no, please, it's no problem at all!"

The pink-haired man laughs softly, a low, husky sound that makes your pulse flutter nervously.

He looks intimidating with his tall height and muscular build, and the tattoos that line his handsome face. But he is distinguished and elegant, wearing a designer suit and an expensive watch. Clearly, he is a regular guest of a restaurant like this.

He looks like a successful CEO (or a Yakuza boss, your mind provides not helpful at all). He's definitely someone in a powerful position, judging by his whole appearance and the dominant and confident aura he exudes. But he also has pastel pink hair, a boyish grin, and a playful attitude that makes him seem not as scary as you first thought.

His wine arrives from a different waitress, and he thanks her politely, telling her,

"Put everything the lovely lady across from me orders on my card."

The waitress is quick to bow deeply with a polite, "Of course, Mr. Itadori," at the same moment, as your eyes widen, and you quickly argue,

"Oh no, please, I can't..."

But he smirks his charming smirk and lifts a large hand dismissively,

"It's the least I can do for ruining your evening in much-wanted solitude."

Much wanted solitude.

His words hit you to the core, making all the sadness well up in you again. If only it were true. If only you were truly a single, independent woman who came here after a successful day at work to enjoy dinner on her own in voluntarily chosen solitude.

But you are none of that. You are an abandoned and unloved wife with a boring job and no money, sitting here at a table for two because your husband ditched you to fuck his pretty little assistant in his office.

And suddenly, the tears are back in your eyes, making it hard to see. You quickly avert your shameful gaze, your hand grabbing your wine glass so tightly it almost breaks.

Your sight is blurry, but you can still see the shocked look on the man's face across from you. His eyes dart away from you but then back again, obviously not used to the company of a crying stranger. He clears his throat before he leans slightly across the table, lowering his voice to a soft murmur,

"Are you alright?"

You feel embarrassment flood you, feeling so mortified at your behavior. You wish the ground would just open up and swallow you! This is so typical of you, ruining this stranger's evening, because you don't have your emotions under control and act like a complete fool. It's something your husband would chide you for or make fun of if he saw it.

"I... I am so sorry! Please just ignore me."

You hate how your voice breaks, and before you can suppress it, a pathetic-sounding sob falls from your lips. You press your hands to your face, sobbing silently into them, trying to hide from the world and from the poor guy who's forced to share this table with you.

But then you feel a tentative touch, a warm hand gently brushing over your arm, and you pull your hands from your face, blinking at your table partner, feeling your lips tremble and your face burning, knowing that you must look so ugly right now with your makeup ruined and tears and snot coating your face.

Another apology is already waiting on your tongue, but he shakes his head, and somehow, it's so authoritative but also gentle that your apology dies on your tongue. Instead, you blink at him, as he cocks his head and watches you thoughtfully, that low voice so smooth and soothing when he says,

"Don't apologize."

You nod, trying to smile gratefully at him, but fail miserably as his kind reaction only causes more tears to fall.

He shoves his hand into the pocket of his suit jacket and pulls out a handkerchief. Not a paper tissue, but an actual handkerchief. He offers it to you, and you reach for it automatically, thanking him. But you freeze the moment your hand wraps around the fabric, realizing it's made out of fine silk.

He raises an eyebrow,

"Please, take it."

"But I... I will just ruin it with my makeup..."

He huffs, a soft smirk lifting his lips,

"I don't care. I'll just buy a new one. Take it. I insist."

"Th.. thank you, sir. That's really sweet of you."

His lips twitch,

"You're welcome. And for you, it's Sukuna, not sir."

You sniffle, pressing his handkerchief against your cheeks as you nod and tell him your name.

His smirk softens to a small smile, and he jerks his tattooed chin toward your empty wine glass.

"Do you want another one of those? Looks like you could use it."

You nod as more tears well up in your eyes, and Sukuna snips his fingers, instantly summoning a waiter to your table as if they are all hovering nearby just waiting for Sukuna to voice a wish.

Five minutes later, you have another red wine to hold on to and sip on, which causes a comforting buzz in your head, and suddenly, it all breaks out of you, and you tell Sukuna everything. You tell him about your failed marriage, about how lonely you feel, how unloved. About your cheating husband. About how pathetic you think you are for not daring to leave him because you have never been on your own before and you have no one who has your back.

You cry and sob and take big gulps of the wine while pouring your heart out to this beautiful stranger sitting across from you. This guy who, despite his intimidating look, is surprisingly gentle with you and who doesn't mind that you stain his silken handkerchief with your mascara and lipstick.

Sukuna actually listens to you. He looks earnestly at you, clenches his jaw when you tell him how your husband treats you, and shakes his head when you say under tears how stupid you think you are.

"No, you aren't. Don't blame yourself. It's him. He is the problem. He is the asshole."

Sukuna is the first one who tells you that you deserve better.

You feel an unexpected relief at finally being able to pour your heart out to someone. And just when you get yourself enough under control again to begin feeling embarrassed at your outburst, Sukuna flashes you a smirk and raises an eyebrow, asking,

"Do you want me to get rid of him for you?"

Which makes you forget the embarrassment and instead stare at him with big eyes and hurriedly splutter,

"Oh my god, no! This is not what I..."

You don't get any further because Sukuna begins to laugh, shaking his head slightly as his eyes sparkle amusedly at you.

"Don't worry. I'm just joking."

You huff a breath of relief, followed by a little laugh. Sukuna's comment managed to pull you out of your little moment of regret, and you feel better again, taking another sip from your wine and even managing to eat a few bites of the meal Sukuna ordered for the two of you, claiming that an empty stomach is never good.

Sukuna is nice to you. It's astounding to you because, with the way he looks with those face tattoos and the slightly dangerous aura surrounding him, you would have never thought a man like him could be so nice. It brings more tears to your eyes, feeling too emotional from all the wine. But you use Sukuna's handkerchief to blot them away.

He leaves with you when you say you have to go home, walks around the table, and pulls out your chair like a real gentleman. He offers you his strong arm when you sway lightly on your heels. He helps you into your coat and accompanies you to the exit.

You stand in front of the restaurant on the busy street, but all you see is Sukuna, who stands so close to you that you can smell his cologne, a sensual, woodsy scent that fits him perfectly, smelling expensive and sexy.

He puts a large hand on your tear-stained cheek, cupping it gently, wiping a few fresh tears away, and you take a step closer to him as if drawn in by a magical force, craving this tender touch, even if it's just a stranger touching your cheek in the middle of a busy sidewalk.

Sukuna is so tall and broad, making you feel so safe somehow, and before you can stop yourself, you lean your head against his broad chest, closing your eyes for a moment and sighing longingly. For the first time in so long, you feel as if you can breathe.

You reluctantly take a step back again, tilting your head to smile up at Sukuna, thanking him again for everything he did for you. And he grins at you and leans down, his lips brushing over your ear, while his hand still caresses your cheek,

"You deserve so much better than your asshole of a husband. Don't hesitate to call or text me when you need a break again."

And with that, he presses a gentle kiss to your cheek. It's such a delicate feeling, so soft and gone again in a split second that you aren't sure if it really happened or if you just imagined it, but it fills you with such warmth that it almost hurts.

Sukuna pulls away with a smirk, and you see a business card dangling from his long fingers. You take it from him with a small, grateful smile.

+++

Several days pass, during which you firmly ignore the business card that's still in your purse.

Waking up the next morning after meeting Sukuna made you feel strange. Guilty somehow. As if you had done something wrong. It's ridiculous, of course. Nothing happened between Sukuna and you. And if someone was supposed to feel guilt, it was your husband. And yet you refused to even look at the business card, feeling like you would be doing something bad if you even so much as entertained the idea of adding Sukuna's number to your contacts.

No, you would never contact Sukuna. You would do as your mom had said. Just accept the circumstances of your marriage and create your own happiness. Maybe you should really find a new hobby. Or maybe you could get a pet? A cat or a dog?

For the next few days, you almost manage to convince yourself that you are fine with your life. You keep yourself busy by researching different cat and dog breeds and starting a new TV show.

But then you walk in on your husband flirting with his affair on the phone again, and you see red. This time, you can't stop yourself from confronting him, from snapping at him and screaming at him under tears to stop it.

It leads to nothing, though. He is so unbothered, so smooth, lying through his teeth, downplaying it, claiming she is just a good friend, making you seem like some nutcase who overreacts at every little thing.

You escape to the bedroom, sitting on the bed, staring off into space as tears stream down your face, feeling so helpless in your rage and misery. What are you supposed to do when your cheating partner refuses to admit he is actually cheating on you?

You wish you had the courage to leave him. Or better, you wish he would take the decision from you and leave you so you won't be the one everyone blames for ending this seemingly perfect marriage! And so you won't have to be the one who makes a decision that will change your whole life.

You yank open your nightstand, searching for some paper tissues. And that's when you see Sukuna's handkerchief again, peeking out from under a package of chocolate cookies.

You brush tenderly over the soft, silken fabric. A small smile lifts your lips as your fingers brush over the initials embroidered on it in one corner in a fancy gold thread. S.I.. Itadori Sukuna.

You let out a long breath, wiping your tears away with one hand while the other holds the handkerchief. And suddenly, the clouds seem to disappear as you remember the warmth you felt when Sukuna cupped your cheek and wiped your tears away. And suddenly you know what you want to do.

You jump up and walk to your dresser, pull it open hurriedly, and yank out the purse you had with you in that restaurant. You open it, impatiently emptying its contents over your bed, until you see the business card with Sukuna's contact information.

On any other day, you would overthink things and take an hour to even make up your mind about what to write, but in the state you are in right now, everything seems so clear.

You grab your phone, add Sukuna's contact, and open a new text message. Your fingers seem to do the work without you consciously having to think about it as they quickly type a message:

"Hey. It's your surprise table partner from last Friday. Thank you again for being so nice to me and for your handkerchief."

You feel triumphant as you place your phone down on your nightstand. And then it buzzes, and your heart jumps to your throat. There's a reply.

"I'm glad you finally texted me. You are very welcome. How are you feeling?"

"I am ok. What about you?"

You cringe at your poor small-talk skills, but Sukuna is surprisingly easy to talk to. He tells you about his day, about business meetings, and what he will have for dinner.

There's a strange feeling spreading through your chest. A kind of longing. You crave the feeling of being near Sukuna again. How safe you felt when leaning your head against his chest for a few seconds. How seen you felt when he listened patiently to you and reassured you.

You want to see him again. Want that feeling again.

"I want to give you back your handkerchief. Where can we meet?"

You know you sound weird as fuck, but it's the only way you dare ask him to meet you again.

"I don't want that handkerchief back, sweetheart. But we should meet up anyway. I quite enjoyed your company. How about you join me again for dinner sometime this week?"

Oh.

Your heart is racing uncontrollably, and your hand shakes as you stare at Sukuna's message.

This is it. This is where things become dangerous. You know the right thing to do would be to say no. It's what a married woman should do. But your husband is in the living room, probably sexting his little affair, so why should you be a good wife?

And so you text Sukuna back, letting him know that dinner sounds great.

+++

The dinner with Sukuna is nice. Really nice. You catch yourself feeling so much lighter, your lips lifted in genuine laughter, your eyes shining with happiness as you spend your evening with Sukuna. He is a very charming conversationalist. Cocky, but in such a playful way that it makes you giggle and feel your face get hot from all the joy it brings you to playfully joke around with him and let him tease you in such a charming and light-hearted way.

Your meeting is innocent, nothing that could be counted as cheating. Just a man and a woman who enjoy good food and wine together and chat about everything and nothing. The occasional small touches don't count, right? Like when Sukuna's large hand brushes over the back of your much smaller hand that's resting on the table.

Or when he reaches across the table to cup your chin and wipe some cherry sauce off the corner of your lips with his thumb. But just because his gentle touch makes your skin tingle and your pulse quicken doesn't mean there is anything going on between Sukuna and you!

Sukuna refuses to let you pay, saying it's a delight for him to have you keep him company. And you laugh bashfully and wave him off but feel so giddy. Sukuna offers you his arm when you walk out of the restaurant, and you take it happily, marveling at how tall he is and how safe you feel walking at his side, biting your lip when you wrap your hand around his upper arm and feel his big biceps flex under your palm.

You say good night on the street in front of the restaurant, and before you know what you are doing, you wrap your arms around Sukuna for a light hug. You intend to pull away again immediately, just a quick, friendly hug, but you get stopped by Sukuna's strong arms wrapping around you, holding you firmly, hugging you back, and not letting you go yet.

He rests his chin on your head, and you have the enticing scent of his cologne in your nose again. You feel so warm and comfortable with Sukuna's strong arms around you, his tall, muscular body pressing against you, warm and reassuring. It makes you let out a shaky breath, overcome with feelings, because you can't remember the last time someone hugged you like this.

Sukuna's low voice is a velvety rumble when he says,

"I am on the National Museum's VIP list. There will be a pre-opening event for a new exhibition this coming week. Heian era. It sounds interesting. Would you like to accompany me?"

You lift your head, looking curiously at Sukuna,

"What must one do to get added to the National Museum's VIP list?"

An amused smirk lifts Sukuna's lips, making him look so unfairly handsome,

"Oh, nothing much, just make one or two generous donations every year."

He shrugs, and you laugh, beaming up at him in amusement as you nod,

"I would love to accompany you."

"Sweet. It's settled, then. I'll text you the day and time."

You want to walk to the subway, but Sukuna stops you with a warm hand on your arm, saying he will drive you home. For a moment, you freeze, not knowing what to say. It feels wrong somehow to let another man drive you to the apartment you share with your husband. And maybe you should be cautious and keep a distance and not let Sukuna know exactly where you live.

But you shake yourself out of it. All of those things have been hammered into your brain all of your life, making you anxious and scared and never truly living your life. You are already meeting with Sukuna for dinner and will accompany him to a museum next week. The world won't end if he knows your address!

You smile at him and nod, telling him it would be very nice if he drove you. And Sukuna smiles back, a pleased look in his maroon eyes. He gently steers you towards the parking space with a large hand resting lightly on the small of your back as you stroll down the street.

You catch yourself having a more upright posture than usual, your head lifted, your lips adorned with a soft smile. You feel like the passerbies are all looking at you and Sukuna. Maybe thinking the two of you are a couple on a date, and the thought makes your stomach tingle.

Sukuna's car is a black Porsche. You don't even know why you are surprised. He grins lazily as he opens the door for you and helps you slip into the passenger seat, handing you your purse when you sit and carefully closing the door behind you before he walks around the front of the fancy sports car and gets into the driver's seat.

"Nice car," you say, and Sukuna turns to look at you with a teasing twinkle in his eyes,

"Well, I'm not a nice guy, so at least my car should be."

"Oh, I think you are very nice."

The two of you hold eye contact for a long moment, both pairs of eyes filled with amusement before you burst out giggling, and Sukuna joins you with his low laugh.

+++

You spend the next evenings at home, having dinner with your husband, who is busy with his phone most of the time, making the cold, heavy feeling in your stomach even worse.

Your only joy is the anticipation you feel in looking forward to Wednesday afternoon when you will meet Sukuna at the museum.

He is already waiting when you arrive, leaning casually against a pillar next to the entrance, tall and handsome with his perfectly styled pink hair and his Tom Ford suit. A dark red one this time, which makes his eyes look like red wine.

Sukuna is a beautiful man.

For a moment, you feel a nervous flutter in your chest, but it vanishes again when Sukuna grins at you and greets you with his warm, low voice and a large hand on your back, pulling you into a half hug.

He doesn't even have to say his name when the two of you approach the young man who greets the guests and ticks off their names on the guest list.

"Ah, Mr Itadori! Have fun at the exhibition. And thank you so much for your generous support."

Your hand slips naturally around Sukuna's arm as you stroll through the exhibition. It feels nice to be here. It makes you realize how long it's been since you last visited a museum. Or did any kind of activity, really. Your husband never had time for you during the last few years.

You can tell that Sukuna is genuinely interested in the exhibition. He already seems to be an expert on the topic, adding interesting facts to the already detailed info sheets next to each exhibition piece.

It's an equal amount of endearing and sexy how nerdy he seems to be about this. Attractive. You like smart men. You like it when a man is passionate about learning everything about a topic that interests him. And Sukuna is like that.

You hang on his lips, soaking up his knowledge, feeling way too hot when you watch the sparkle in his maroon eyes as he goes into a passionate monologue about political intrigues during the timeline of one of the exhibition pieces.

And he seems to like that you also show genuine interest in the exhibition and in what he has to say about it. He blesses you with a soft smile that makes your stomach flutter. You feel exhilarated, your heart pounding in your chest, almost bursting with happiness. A long-forgotten feeling emerging again after so many years.

You thank Sukuna profusely for the fun afternoon, and he grins that charming, boyish grin at you and tells you he is grateful that you kept him such lovely company.

This time, there is no doubt about whether he really kisses your cheek or not. His lips linger on your heated skin for a long moment, soft lips pressing a gentle kiss to your cheek before Sukuna smiles at you and cups your other cheek with his hand, his long fingers caressing it slowly.

"Let's meet again for dinner next week, sweetheart."

+++

You pace your living room restlessly.

Your trip to the museum with Sukuna made you realize something. It made you realize what this giddy feeling is that has been filling you ever since you started to meet up with him. That light-hearted, fluttery, happy feeling you get when you see him or even just when you think of him (which is almost every waking second of your day).

You try to shut down those feelings, telling yourself it's dangerous to let someone make you feel so much again. It makes you too vulnerable. It will only lead to more chaos and more hurt.

Why would a man like Sukuna even be interested in anything serious with me? He can probably have anyone. Either he only sees me as a friend, or I am just a little fling to him. I have to stop this before I get in even deeper!

In the coming week, you cancel your dinner with Sukuna by sending him a short text telling him you have a cold. He sends you a get well soon message and asks if you need anything, which you deny, even while you sob silently because Sukuna is so caring, and all you want to do is run into his strong arms and forget about your joyless life.

But you stay strong and put your phone away, forbidding yourself from sending more messages to Sukuna.

Your husband makes a rare attempt to talk to you, and you already know what he wants. After tiptoeing around you for several hours, he asks you for sex. You join him in the dark bedroom, feeling nothing as you slip out of your clothes and climb into bed with him.

You have learned to close your eyes during sex and let your mind wander, imagining all kinds of fictional scenarios to help you feel anything at all. But this time, you don't think of a fictional love interest out of a romance novel or an actor you find attractive. This time, you think of Sukuna.

You feel dirty afterward as you stand under the shower and scrub at your skin. Dirty for thinking of Sukuna while you slept with your husband. But what makes you feel even dirtier is that you still let your cheating husband touch you even though Sukuna is so nice to you. It feels as if you are cheating on both of them.

You cry so much that you feel like you have no tears left.

+++

Even though you haven't met or talked to Sukuna in over a week, he is still constantly on your mind. You are haunted by images of him. That beautiful tattooed face. That sexy low voice and the playful smirk. That tall and muscular body that makes you feel so tiny in comparison and so safe when you are standing in front of him or leaning against him.

You sigh. One would assume that acknowledging that you are developing romantic feelings for Sukuna would make things easier for you. Clearer. But the thing is, even though you know what your heart wants, you are still too scared to end things with your husband. There are too many insecurities. Too many risks and you feel so useless and weak, just like your parents always told you you are.

You feel frozen, unable to make a move. There is this wonderful man who treats you as if you are special and shows you how a man is supposed to make you feel, and yet you lack the courage to get out of your loveless marriage.

You have always been an overthinker, always scared to trust your instincts. Brought up to always be sensible and make decisions with your head and not your heart. So how could you just leave the security of this marriage? Especially when you are trying to convince yourself that Sukuna would never want a relationship anyway.

No, you can't let yourself believe that you could have a future with Sukuna. This is just a stupid dream born out of your naivety, which your parents always warned you about.

And how could you even go about ending things with your husband? Sit him down and tell him it's over? But what then? What do you do when he just refuses to accept it?

Or should you just pack your bag and leave while he is at work, letting him return to an empty apartment and a goodbye letter on the kitchen table? But where would you go? To a hotel? You have no money. To your parents? You would feel so ashamed, and you fear their judgment. To a friend? You don't really have any friends anymore who you are close enough with to ask this of.

You sigh. None of it seems achievable. Not for you. You are too chicken to do any of it.

Your husband informs you that he will be gone for two days for a business trip, and you let out a breath of relief, happy about the freedom you feel when he is away and you have the apartment to yourself.

You open a bottle of wine, listen to your favorite playlist, and dance around the kitchen, almost able to convince yourself that things will be ok and you can just live a life feeling detached from the hurt your marriage causes you.

And then your iPad dies. You groan, quickly walking to the spare room you use as an office to grab your husband's laptop, only to get greeted by his e-mail inbox, where you see a booking confirmation for a romantic couple getaway for the next two days.

You stare at it wide-eyed. And then you sit down in a daze and go through the received and sent e-mails, only discovering more outrageous things. The escort girls your husband booked over the last year, the flowers he ordered for other women, while you never got any flowers from him in all your years married to him. The romantic getaways he booked anytime he claimed to go on business trips.

You can't even cry about it anymore. The sadness is replaced by cold rage. And by a strange feeling of resignation. You know you could show all of this to your mom and finally make her believe what you told her all this time. Finally, presenting her and everyone else with proof of how badly your husband treats you.

But even as you snap pictures of the e-mails, you realize you can't bring yourself to do it. And the infuriating thing about it is that it's not even because it causes you hurt, but because you still want to protect your husband. If you show your mom this, she will confront him and make a huge scene. And you don't want that to happen. Even after everything he did, you still are too much of a good girl to let him face the rage of your mom.

That's why you close the laptop again without doing anything. You make sure to put it back to where you found it.

But a different kind of conviction has settled over you. If your asshole of a husband can go on romantic getaways and sex meetings, you can allow yourself some fun, too, can't you?

It's not even that you plan to have sex when you text Sukuna. You just want to meet him for dinner or another trip to the museum. You just want to talk to him, and laugh with him and soak up the light feeling he gives you.

He calls you instead of texting back. Your heart races when you take the call, and Sukuna's velvety low voice fills your ear,

"I just came home from a big grocery haul. So how about instead of meeting at a restaurant, you come to my apartment, and I cook for you?"

You agree instantly.

+++

Unsurprisingly, Sukuna lives in one of the most expensive neighborhoods of the city. The luxurious apartment complex makes you feel nervous and a bit out of place. But that uneasiness slips from you the moment Sukuna opens his door and greets you with that sexy, teasing smirk and a playful little comment.

It's the first time you see Sukuna dressed casually. And it undeniably does something to you to see him in a pair of gray sweatpants and a rather snug-fitting white t-shirt that clings to his buff pecs and gives you a nice view of his muscular arms and more of his tattoos. You aren't sure what is more mouth-watering, the food that is simmering in one of the pots on Sukuna's stove or his big biceps that flex deliciously with every move.

Sukuna lifts you onto the kitchen counter, easily picking you up and setting you down as if you weigh nothing. A fact that makes you all flustered and sends your pulse racing, making you gratefully grab the wine glass Sukuna is offering you, so you can hide your face behind it and let the alcohol calm your nerves.

No man has ever cooked for you before, and watching Sukuna do it is one of the most attractive things you have ever witnessed. He is so sexy. Passionate and skilled, and still always taking time to playfully flirt with you or ask you to try one of his dishes, feeding you food from a spoon or from his fingers.

There is a special kind of electricity between you tonight. An almost touchable tension that makes your skin tingle anytime Sukuna brushes up against you.

His voice is husky when he tells you what ingredients he uses to marinate the roasted vegetables. And you can't help but let your tongue flick over his fingers when he pushes a slice of roasted zucchini against your lips.

Sukuna groans softly. Your breath hitches in your throat, and you look up at his tattooed face. You are met by a hungry glint in those beautiful maroon eyes that remind you of the wine Sukuna poured for you.

You are caught in Sukuna's intense gaze, unable to look away. Everything else seems to fade away.

And the next thing you know is that Sukuna is kissing you. Or maybe you were the one who pressed her lips against his first. You don't know. All you know is that you are kissing right here in Sukuna's kitchen while you sit on the kitchen counter, and he is standing between your legs. His large hands are cupping your cheeks and tilting your head back, and your hands are twisting in the front of his soft white t-shirt, pulling him closer to you as you sigh needily into his mouth.

Sukuna kisses you like you have never been kissed before. Passionate, fiery. Deep and sensual, making your head spin and your pulse flutter under Sukuna's hands.

You can't get enough of him and wrap your arms and legs around him as if you are scared he will vanish into thin air if you let go of him. You kiss him with a hunger unknown to you until now. Like a starving person being presented with a life-saving meal.

Sukuna's large hands trail down your sides, fingertips grazing over the sides of your breasts, eliciting a needy little whine from you, and further down until they reach your thighs. You are drunk on his kiss, drunk on him, melting under every little touch.

And Sukuna hums in the back of his throat and deepens the kiss even more. His large hands slip under you, cupping your ass, kneading it while he makes you moan around his tongue.

You have always been shy, but there is something about Sukuna and the way he makes you feel that makes you slip a hand under his t-shirt, feeling him up, greedily caressing his flexing abs, feeling dizzy at how good his firm muscles feel under your fingertips.

You both can't seem to stop kissing, both tumbling down further and further into this heated desire. You are faintly aware of Sukuna mumbling against your lips that the sauce needs to simmer for another hour anyway, and then he picks you up and lifts you easily off the kitchen counter while his lips claim yours again.

Sukuna carries you to his bedroom while never breaking the kiss, and you suck on his bottom lip and run your greedy hands through his soft pink hair and down his bulging biceps, wanting him so much that you think you will die if you don't get all of him tonight.

You sleep with Sukuna on his fancy bed, and it's nothing like it was with your husband. It's like you finally learn how sex is supposed to feel with a man who truly wants you.

Sukuna makes you feel wanted and desired, a feeling that is so new to you after all these years caught in a loveless marriage where your husband made you feel undesirable, unattractive, and like you would never be able to find anyone else with how your body looks and how lousy you are in bed.

But with Sukuna, it is completely different. You feel sexy here in his bed with the way he looks at you when he undresses you. And with the way he moans sweet praise in your ear before his lips and hands worship your body.

Sukuna is a real man. Experienced and confident, but so loving and patient with you when you get shy and tell him that you aren't very experienced and that your husband was disappointed in your skills in the bedroom.

At one point, you tense up, thinking Sukuna will get angry like your husband when you are clumsy during sex. But the opposite is the case. Sukuna is calm and gentle, talking to you in that sexy low voice, all soothing and sexy, telling you that it's ok and that you don't have to be scared or embarrassed.

He kisses you until your head spins and then asks you why you got so tense, asks you what you need. And you almost break out in tears, hugging him tightly, hiding your face in his defined pecs, inhaling his scent, and feeling so loved and so safe in his strong arms like never before.

"I just... I have only been with my husband, and he told me I am not good in bed. He always got mad at me when I didn't know how something worked. I am sorry if I am not what you are used to."

And you feel Sukuna's arms tightening around you, feel him tense up. But he isn't angry with you, only with your husband.

"That man is such a fool. Look at me, darling."

You lift your head off his chest and look at his tattooed face when he looks at you all earnestly,

"You are a beautiful woman, sexy and desirable, and I want to fuck you so good you forget your own name. Because that's what you deserve. And you don't have to be experienced or fuck like a pornstar. You are perfect the way you are, and you drive me crazy. And if you don't know how something works and you want to learn it, then I will teach you, and I promise I will be patient and gentle."

You nod wildly, feeling too emotional to speak, and instead press your body against Sukuna's and capture his lips in another needy kiss. You can feel his smile against your lips when he wraps his large hands around your waist and takes control.

Everything is so easy after that. No words are needed. Just hands and lips exploring each other's skin in heated caresses and bodies entangled in feverish passion. You let yourself fall, give yourself fully into Sukuna's loving hands. Let him take care of you like no one has ever done before.

He fucks you so good you cry.

All the years of feeling undesirable and not enough slip off you now that you are in Sukuna's bed under his gorgeous, tall, and heavy body, your nails leaving scratches on his broad back, hot tears of bliss streaming down your cheeks, and his name falling sweetly from your lips over and over again like a prayer.

It's like you are finally alive, like you are a flower that finally blooms after all these years.

+++

That first night in Sukuna's bed changed you profoundly.

You catch yourself smiling all day. There's a new bounce in your steps. You feel so much lighter. Your stomach is filled with butterflies as if you are a teenager again who has her first crush. Your chest feels so warm. You're filled with new hope. Maybe there is more to life and love than you thought, after all.

You feel like, for the first time, someone has really seen you. You weren't aware that sex like this existed in real life. That a man could make you fall apart like that. Sukuna fucked you in a way that was life-changing, making you feel like you gave him not just your body but also your soul.

And as passionate and nasty as the sex with Sukuna was, he made you feel respected the whole time. Adored. That is what makes you lose your mind anytime you think of it. You have been with your husband for so long, and yet even in the beginning, when the feelings were still fresh, he never made you feel adored or loved in bed. You didn't even know it until now, but he only ever made you feel used.

When your husband asks you for sex, you turn him down his time, telling him you aren't in the mood, and you don't even feel guilty for it.

You keep running back into Sukuna's strong arms over and over again. Into his bed, under his heavy body, where you feel loved and wanted. It's like he opened your eyes, and now you can see all those new colors that you only seem to be able to see with him.

+++

Your clandestine meetings continue for weeks. It surprises you to see winter turn into spring, and yet Sukuna is still texting you, inviting you to more dinner dates and to more intimate meetings in his bedroom. You always assumed he would end your little affair before things became too serious.

But somehow, he is still in your life, reserving his Wednesday evenings for you, buying you roses, and taking you to the best restaurants in the city.

One night, you sit up in his bed on the ruffled silk sheets and bite your lip as you let your gaze trail over Sukuna's naked body. His tattooed skin, his buff muscles, his beautiful silhouette. And you blurt out,

"Why do you keep seeing me?"

It's what you have been asking yourself from the start. What does Sukuna see in you? You are mediocre in every way. Average looks, no real talents, and no impressive career. A wife who got neglected by her husband because she wasn't good enough in his eyes. A woman in her thirties, who was replaced by a younger, more attractive version.

Sukuna, on the other hand, is gorgeous, powerful and rich, and his age only makes him more attractive. He could have anyone.

Sukuna hums softly and turns onto his side, lifting his head to watch you with curious maroon eyes.

"What do you mean, darling?"

You avert your gaze, sighing, bringing up your hands in a helpless little gesture,

"I... I mean, you are you, and I am me. And I just don't understand what you see in me."

Now, the noise Sukuna makes sounds a bit like a growl. You feel stupid for saying anything, already about to scramble out of his bed and flee before you make an even bigger fool of yourself. But you don't make it out of bed. Sukuna's strong arms wrap around you and stop you. He pulls you back into his arms and against his solid, broad chest.

"Don't belittle yourself like that. I keep asking to see you because I want to. Because I like spending time with you. You are so sweet. You make me feel so warm when I have always felt so cold."

His words hit you like a truck. You blink rapidly, your eyelashes fluttering against Sukuna's chest.

"R... really?"

He huffs softly, letting out a low chuckle as his large hand pets your hair,

"Yes, really. I used to only have one-night stands or casual flings. Just sex and nothing more. I used to think that was all I needed. But you showed me something different. Hell, I've never spent so much time with a woman before I slept with her for the first time. And I enjoyed every second of it! I like spending time with you to talk and laugh with you and just have this companionship. You make me feel like maybe I am not that cold-hearted asshole I always thought I was."

You gulp hard, tears filling your eyes. But this time, happy ones. You sniffle against Sukuna's naked chest and press a tender kiss to his tattooed skin.

"You are so sweet, Sukuna."

He laughs softly, and you can feel it against your cheek, a low rumble, where your face is resting on his chest,

"You are the first one who told me I am sweet. Are you sure?"

Now, you laugh softly, too. The insecurity you felt a moment ago forgotten,

"Yes, 100% sure. No one has ever treated me as sweet as you."

"It's what you deserve. You are so sweet that I want to be sweet for you, too. And..."

Sukuna's large hands tighten around your hips, and he flips you over. He rolls on top of you, covering you whole with his tall, broad body. His lips find your neck, trailing little kisses over it, his low voice a seductive murmur in your ear,

"You're not just sweet, but also beautiful and sexy, and you make me laugh, and I want to take you places and cook for you and also want to keep you on my cock all night and feel you squeeze around me and hear you cry my name."

Sukuna grinds his hips against you, pushing you into the mattress, taking you with one powerful, deep thrust for the second time tonight. You gasp and cling to his broad shoulders, your legs wrapping around his hips, welcoming him, craving him, needing him.

He takes it slow. Slow, deep thrusts, his forehead resting against yours, his low voice moaning sweet nothings in between deep, sensual kisses.

It's then that you realize that Sukuna is doing what no one else ever did to you. Sukuna is making love to you.

And you cry hot tears, drowning in his love and his body and everything he gives you. Your nails leave scratches on his broad back, your heels dig into his firm ass, as you throw your head back and cry out his name in the sweetest ecstasy.

He holds you afterward, lies behind you, and wraps his tall, strong body around you. He hugs you with his strong arms and nuzzles his face into your neck, breathing kisses onto your skin, not letting go of you, taking care of you, cuddling you. Something you also never had before. A man who is willingly holding you like that for hours after he came in you.

You sigh happily, still in a daze. The occasional tear still runs down your cheek as you snuggle against Sukuna's muscular body, and your hands caress his tattooed forearms tenderly. You never want to leave his arms again. You want to stay right here.

As if reading your mind, Sukuna's low voice murmurs against your skin again,

"I mean it, darling. I like having you in my life. So much that I want you in it all the time."

One of his large hands caresses your belly, so tender, so loving, sending butterflies fluttering in it like crazy. And Sukuna breathes in your ear,

"Be mine."

You draw in a sharp breath and turn around in Sukuna's arms, cupping his face with your hands as you kiss him, long and sweet, and in between kisses, you murmur against his lips,

"I am already yours."

You know it is the truth. Even though you are still married to another man, even though you are still living with your husband, you are Sukuna's woman now. You suspect you have been Sukuna's woman for several months already, long before you allowed yourself to admit it out loud.

+++

Two hours later, you are buttoning up your coat, about to leave Sukuna's apartment and the sweet bliss of his arms and return to your cold, loveless marriage, and your lonely apartment, when Sukuna stops in front of you. He reaches out, wordlessly helping you with the buttons, dominant in such a caring way, and somehow, that small loving gesture makes your lips tremble as you are overcome by emotions.

He is so good to you. Such a giant of a man, so tall and broad and powerful. And yet, he treats you so gently. Large hands buttoning up your coat for you. The hands that also cook Michelin-star-worthy meals for you, or wash your hair in his luxurious bathtub. The hands that make you see stars when they finger you oh so good. The hands that caress your cheek tenderly and brush your tears away with so much care. Hands that give to you over and over again. A hundred little acts of service that this powerful man gives to you.

"Sukuna, I..."

You trail off, not able to put into words what you want to say to him. How much he means to you. How much you want him. How he made you believe in love again. How much you crave to leave your old life behind and start over new with Sukuna even though you are so scared of change.

Before you can say any of it, Sukuna grabs your wrists, takes them firmly but gently into his larger hands, and looks at you intensely.

"Leave that asshole. He doesn't deserve you, princess. If a man can't see what he has in you, then he is trash. Don't be scared. I can take much better care of you than him. I'll fuck you good and make you only cry happy tears. I will appreciate you like you deserve. I will love you like you deserve. I will ensure you always have everything you need. I have money, and I can protect you. Tell me, darling, who would you feel safer with waking through the city in the middle of the night? That joke of a man or me?"

Of course, you know the answer.

"I love you, Sukuna."

"I love you, too."

His strong arms wrap around you and pull you into a hug, and you nuzzle your face into his chest, inhaling the comforting scent of his cologne. And finally, here in the safety of Sukuna's embrace, you say those words you have been too scared to say until now,

"I will leave him. I want to be with you. Only with you, Kuna."

You can hear the smile in Sukuna's voice when he replies,

"I'll help you, sweetheart. I have one of the best lawyers in the whole country. I'll call him tomorrow to prepare the divorce papers. I'll take care of everything for you."

Sukuna cups the back of your head and leans down to kiss your forehead gently, reassuringly. He looks at you with that boyish grin you fell in love with and adds in a playful and husky voice,

"And once all of this is dealt with, I will make you my wife."

He takes your left hand into his, turning it around, inspecting the wedding ring you are still wearing, scrunching his nose at it,

"And I'll give you a much prettier ring."

+++

You let the door fall softly shut behind you one last time as you walk out of the apartment you had been sharing with your husband for over a decade. A smile lifts your lips. You are glad to close this chapter of your life.

You know that a braver woman would have left her husband sooner, would have moved out, or kicked him out the moment she found out he was cheating on her. Maybe even sooner, when she realized she was unhappy in that marriage. But you aren't brave. You have always been full of self-doubts and fears. Too ashamed to crawl back to your parents and admit that you hadn't been strong enough to endure your marriage. Too scared that you would never recover from the financial loss of the divorce. Too insecure to believe you could ever make it on your own.

But now you have Sukuna. And the fall doesn't seem so high anymore. You know Sukuna will catch you in his strong arms. He won't let you crash to the ground.

In the end, you think it doesn't matter how you got out of that unhappy marriage and into this loving relationship. All that matters is that you got a second chance to learn how love is supposed to be.

And it still takes bravery to leave your husband and walk into Sukuna's arms. To close the door of your marriage and open the one that leads to the man who came into your life as an illicit affair but has become your one and only.

OH SUKUNA, I NEED YOU 😭😭💗💗 He really took one look at Reader having her breakdown in that restaurant and was like, "I will steal that woman from that loser and give her what she deserves." Thank you, Kuna baby ;)

Thank you so much if you read the whole thing! This story became much longer than I thought, but the words wouldn't stop flowing out of me because this story made me so happy. I hope it could give some of you the same feeling.

I often see posts/articles that victim-blame the women who don't have the courage to leave an unhappy marriage, so I wanted to write something where Reader isn't a strong, independent woman but someone who needs a little encouragement and lots of love from a man like Kuna before she dares make the decision to leave her husband. She deserves all the happiness!

I hope you enjoyed the story and maybe fell a little in love with this version of Sukuna, too 💗

Comments and reblogs would be very sweet.

[bunny-jpeg]

better than home (kidnapper!simon) - you had seen enough horror movies to know that being kidnapped meant being on the news, being butchered, and being a cold case. but simon wasn't like that. except for the bruises he left when he took you, his touch had gentle. kind in a way that someone would brush their cat.

you flinched under his touch, but he just simply shushed you. "not gonna break a thing on ya, angel." that was his name for you. angel. he said that it was like you were given to him fro heaven, "if i do, i give ya the right to put a knife between my ribs."

it was unnerving to say the least. in the tiny home you both shared, locks on the windows, you had never seen a front door that needed a key to unlock from the outside. you tried getting out, but simon was simply so much bigger and stronger, that he didn't need to hurt you herd you back into a safer place.

"don't need to think about much anymore. safer here." he said in his gruff voice. you didn't know what kind of life this man had lived, but with the hunting knife on the coffee table, the well-used rifle over the fireplace and the old army formals in his closet. you knew that there was a story.

it didn't sink in till the first week, but you didn't have to worry about anything. you moved through the house on your own, when you scurried into rooms simon sometimes didn't follow. it was like he was bird-watching. keeping a close eye and admiring you. except you weren't exactly a free bird, rather a delicate beauty in a shiny cage.

you were surprised that simon had your favourite snacks in the pantry, even the same brand of plant-based milk you enjoyed. it was like he knew everything about you, and yet he was a total mystery.

"scary world out there." simon said, kept his distance from you in the recliner while you were curled up in the couch. you had taken a liking to a black and white checkered flannel blanket. it reminded you of the one back home, that you wondered if he just broke in a took it. he eyed you, which made it hard to read one of your many books, "pretty things like you need to be protected... bad men out there." as if this massive mountain of a man wasn't one of those so-called bad men.

you were in no place to argue. you still felt like you were in a spring locked trap and one wrong move would have it clamped down on you. that this was just some sick game before simon buried your body in the field behind the house.

"when can i go home?" you asked, finding your voice.

"this is better than home."

"are you going to kill me?" you asked before you swallowed the lump in your throat.

he shook his head, "no, ma'am. never." sounded like wedding vows rather than an answer. your curiosity only grew with each day. when you finished the books he brought you, he simply put them back in a bag and returned them from where they came from and came back with new ones.

"saw them on the shelf at the library, thought a woman like you would like them." he gave a curt nod as he dropped the canvas bag by your little nest of blankets on the floor by the television. you hadn't been able to watch television yet. primarily busied with sleeping, books, puzzles and notebooks where you had been writing.

and while it started a journal in the event the police found you. it had become more about fictional stories. for your personal pleasure. you thought about being a writer as a child, but the grind of corporate work in your adulthood seemed to dash that dream.

"next time." you said, feeling a little bold, "can you get some science fiction books too...." it felt uneasy to make any demands. he was your captor.

"well then, angel. be good for me then." he said, smiled under that mask. you looked over and made a face at him. you scampered off back into your nest of books and puzzles. maybe he was right, this was better than home. <3

a/n: this is unwell, i hope you enjoyed it. thank you!!

[poemnic-tarot]

✨🌸Who are you becoming?🌸✨

This is a Timeless Pick a Card but you can use this as Who you are becoming in 2025

(Disclaimer: This is a general reading please only take what resonate. For entertainment purposes only)

☀️ 🍉 ☁️ 🌤️ You Are Loved ☀️ 🍉 ☁️ 🌤️

Pile 1: The hermit🌤️☀️ Dawn

Dragons Oracle card - 24. Freedom: Breaking the chains

Who are you becoming Pile 1 is more independent.

You are not afraid to be alone anymore, cause you know that you never are. Spirit and your Guardian Angles are alway with you. In the past if you had a hard time spending time by yourself, doing thing on your own, for example, going to a cafe by yourself. You are transforming into someone that wait for nobody. If you want to watch a movie and can't find anyone to go with, you will find that you have no problem doing things on your own anymore.Which make you dangerous cause you really don't need people. Being in solitude used to feel isolating but not anymore. Now, it feels like Freedom. Like you have broken past chains and shackles of expectation and the standard that been put on you either from others or yourself. You have healed your attachment wounds.You are no longer conforming to what's is conventional or normal, you are becoming someone who is/will choose their own path. Going your own way used to feel scary but you are becoming someone who will feel relieved when you finally choose it. You have realise that there is no right or wrong way to go about life and everyone has their own unique path, it is time you focus on yours.

You have break free from a limited mindset, options, or even environment. Now the world seem endless and expansive but also connected to you more than ever. If you used to have social anxiety in public, now you might find yourself being the one striking a conversation with a stranger!

Who you are becoming is more You, as you shed and let go of expectation of others, societies and layers and layers of falsehood in the name of self protection. You don't need the mask anymore cause you know you are safe to be WHO YOU ARE. Now, you are free to do whatever you want, where ever you want to go, without having to consider others. You might have been too considerate in the past regarding your own life, so it is time to balance it out. For example, if you were a person okay with whatever choice your friends chooses, there's no more of that. You now know what you want to experience, in fact, you have alway know what kind of experience you want to have, but in the past you might've been too scare to do it alone or you were waiting for others to go with you. But no more, you are finally not afraid to go on your own. Solo traveling might be your plan in the near future. You are becoming someone who bath and appreciate in your own company, knowing that your own company is enough. Knowing that even if you don't have anyone right now, you will alway have YOU.

Signs: Aquarius, White stag, Watermelon, Yellow birds, White Castle, 99, 24, 69 , Fog, Blue, Bear cub, Germany

Poem: Blue Or Red by @cant-find-my-name Feeling lost but I know I am guided I don't hold the map I followed the Stars The constellation showed me the path Only I can see I choose to go my own way And the journey is lonely and vicious Many times, I've thought to maybe stop And let the conventional normalcy Control me Like everyone else Being different made you a target Everyone chooses blue But I said Red Now they can all see My choice in all it's glory They all went for ordinary But I decided to create my own Fate

Song: When The Darkness Comes by Colbie Caillat

I'll be here waiting Hoping, praying that This light will guide you home When you're feeling lost I'll leave my love Hidden in the sun For when the darkness comes

Now the door is open The world I knew is broken There's no return Now my heart is not scared Just knowing that you're out there Watching me

Aesthetic : Your energy feels like A DAWN but the light has not yet come through. A misty, foggy morning where the view is limited, but now and then the fog lifted and you can see the horizon, the view ahead and it look like hope and anticipation. And it feels like some thing or someone is coming to meet you. Suddenly, appeared out of that fog and materialised in front of your eyes, a silhouette of a person. You hold your breath as you watch the person walked toward you, all around you is silent, you can even hear the dew drop on leaves. Shadow still roam but it feel distance cause not long now, it will be wash out by the light.

It reminds me of a scene where Mr Darcy from Pride and Prejudice, walking through the fog coming to meet Elizabeth, but instead of Mr Darcy, the person walking is who you are becoming, walking towards the you now, walking to meet you, to declare their love and promises to take care of you.

☀️ 🍉 ☁️ 🌤️ You Are Loved ☀️ 🍉 ☁️ 🌤️

Pile 2:The Hanged man🌹🥂Skyflower

Dragons Oracle Card - 22. Rebirth: Giving yourself a second chance

Who are you becoming Pile 2 is Surrendering/ Letting go

You realised that it's okay not to have all the answer.You are finally okay with not knowing your next step or where to go. If you were a person who like to plan ahead or have a 5 years plan. Pile 2 you are becoming a person who doesn't have that and is alright with it. Having a plan doesn't mean it's bad, sometime we do need a plan but, I think you want to try something new. To become something or someone you have never been before. Which is living in the present and is okay with the Unknown.

The best decision is made in the present and you are finally in the present enough to make the decision. In the past, you might have made decision for the future and it used to soothed you something to look forward to, for example, booking your next vacation, but lately, it might have feel restricted and binds you and it feels like it does not leave room for you to go with the feeling at the present. When the time of the booking come, you find yourself not in the mood but you have to go cause you booked it. So you are becoming someone who goes with the flow, taking it day by day.Maybe you used to be obsessed with the future,needing to know every details about things you want to do but, you realised it had taken the fun out of the experience and now you lean toward surprises. You want to be surprise by life. You don't even want to be right you want to be taken aback, like in a good way. For example, you don't know where to go for your next vacation yet and instead you want to go with your urges.Throw the dice and see where it will land. The mystery used to scare you but now it's exhilarating.

Maybe in the past or in childhood you might have hold back a lot because of circumstances, saved the best for last kind of type. but you are becoming someone who will eat their most favourited thing on the plate first, maybe even eat dessert before meal because why not?. If the old way haven't work or give you that satisfaction why not try a different way? You are becoming someone who is willing to try a different way. Let go of the old way of doing things, that alway been done before and surrender to the calling of the moment. That quote, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting a different result. You realise that if you want different result you have to try a different ways. And you are finally willing to, you have healed your control issues. The outcome does not matter to you, in fact, you don't want to know, you want it to surprises you.

It is not easy to let go and try again but you are becoming some one who is willing to and chance it to see where your whims will lead you. The best story you read is alway the one that you can't predict so the best kind of life is the one where you can't quite predict either. The unknown used to scare you and in the past you have prepared preventative and steps to counter the unexpected, but now?, you are becoming someone who welcome it.

Signs: Pisces, Aries, Sagittarius, Sleeping Beauty, Snowboard, Snow, Firework, Vines of roses, 22, 13, Bird of paradise, The Alps mountain

Poems : Fireworks by @cant-find-my-name And I'm getting up from a hard fall You don't know what it's like to be At the bottom Because you alway stayed in the middle What goes up must come down What's down must shoot up And like Fireworks I'm shooting high There will be Exploding lights A grand finale Of what I'm capable of People will witness My Magnificent They can't miss it or undervalue it As it will shine Glorious like the sun Encompassing everyone

Songs : Spin The Wheel by Arcane and League of Legends

Go spin the wheel and see where it lands Join in the circus, stay for a dance, and Right when the war quiets down, ya strike up the band Keep marching on, my friends And do what you can

Wait 'til your brothers and your sisters, see where you been And if you loved the journey more than the end, go ahead Just turn that hourglass around and count to ten This ain't goodbye no more Nah, it just began

Aesthetic: You feel like unexpected fireworks, in the middle of the night quiet and unassuming. The slient is expected but then BOOM!, Bam!, goes the fires work out of no where. The sound caught you off guard but the light caught your eyes and you cannot look away. Whatever you were doing at that moment, you have to drop it and stared, transfixed on the Blooming of flowers/light in the sky. Your energy is mesmerising to other in a way of unexpectedness. The person watching doesn't want it to end, they want it to go on forever.

But all good things come to an end, you left an Unforgettable impression and people cannot denied the impact you have on their lives. Life changing impact. One moment you're here and the next, you're gone. Like a mirage or a wake up call from the Divines. Life is like going through darkness and then, an explosion of lights, you can't believe your eyes. Your energy is what people been waiting for their whole life, to witness, to feel, to BE. YOU ARE Becoming the Skyflower. The energy that awaken people to be in the moment, where ever they are in life, no one can miss when the fireworks goes off in the sky, but if people move too fast, or not pay enough attention, they might miss you altogether Pile 2. And it’s hard to come across your energy again.

☀️ 🍉 ☁️ 🌤️ You Are Loved ☀️ 🍉 ☁️ 🌤️

Pile 3: The Empress🪷🌱 Saviour

Dragons Oracle card -16. Destruction: Releasing Your Anger

Pile 3 who are you becoming is a Saint

Have you ever heard of that quote? You have to go through war in order to get peace. Or when a good man go to war?, or people don't know how much violent it took to be this soft. I'm not sure how it goes but, you are becoming someone people are hesitant to mess with. You have been through a lot Pile 3, my sympathies. People, circumstances, life has put you through a ringer but, who you are becoming is surprisingly not jaded. You are becoming ZEN. 'The Way of Zen' a book by Alans Watt is highly recommended here.

A lot of situation might have tested your patient, tested your demons, tested your self -worth. You might have gone through injustice, heartbreak and inequality, betrayal in someway, a lot actually. To the point of ridiculousness. You might have a victim mentality in the past, why me?, why did it have to alway be me?. You might have thought that you were unlucky as well. But who you are becoming is so beautiful. I'm seeing a lotus flower finally rising from the mud and blooming. You got passed the mud and layers of dirt, now, it is finally time to blossom into who you really are. I feel like who you are becoming is your Justice.

In the past, people might have tested your characters, baited you, tried to rile you up, persuaded you into doing things you will regret because they could not believe that you're this pure, this good. No matter what anyone told you Pile 3, you are pure, innocent and just a good person. All your anger and resentment is justified. Again that quote comes to mind, When good man goes to war, I don't know what the original context is but, in this context of the reading, something must have happened or someone must have done something so irrevocably bad that it got the most peaceful, the most kind person to take action. Which is YOU. I feel like it's not who you are becoming, it's more like, you have already become someone who is friends with their demons, most people are afraid of themselves without even knowing but,You have no fears. You have tamed a wild beast inside you and if someone come along poking your inner beast, they will quickly learn why it is not wise to wake a sleeping dragon.

Your masculine and feminine energy seem quite balance which is rare. You got the empress but you are someone who can be both nurturing but also protective of yourself at the same time. Divine Balance of energy, you can both defence and attack, you can play both roles. Maybe in the past people underestimated you and thought you are too soft, too sweet to hit back or stand up for yourself but not anymore. It's remind me of a character, Mel from Arcane, she is the wolf and the rabbit. You can be the prey and predator depending on the circumstances. You're not the victim of life anymore, you're a Multiplayers avatar. If this situation need a saviour you'll be one, if a villain is needed, you're not afraid to take on that role. If a Saint is called upon, Here you are. You have become a multifacets characters beyond the human limit and now a lot of darkness or energy will think twice before trying something.

It's not that you're becoming a target, it just natural for people to shoot down someone whose powerful. You are becoming someone who is so powerful, but it's not in a way that's obvious, it's in a way that, pardon my french, if you fuck around you'll find out how powerful Pile 3 is.

“Demons run when a good man goes to war Night will fall and drown the sun When a good man goes to war Friendship dies and true love lies Night will fall and the dark will rise When a good man goes to war Demons run, but count the cost The battle's won, but the child is lost”

― Steven Moffat

Signs: Camellia flowers, Lotus, Sun, Stature, Mary, red or purple roses, Griffin, Dragons, Red and orange, 33, 77

Poem : You Are Willing by @cant-find-my-name There's something special about you Do you know the Divine picked you? Your light is so bright Especially when you are surrounded by Darkness Your skin glow Like the gentle sunset kiss Your eyes shined throughout The Infinite knowledge of the universe It's never a hard decision for you To alway choose love You came here to serve You came here to stop the spreading of hate Of reigning illusion You know you have the will To create fate Of the earth and bring it To a higher position You have a God gift power To shift dimension You came to blessed Those who are willing You volunteered to lead The one that is open to heaven

Song : ZEN BY JENNIE

I tell 'em, "Down, now" On that energy, yes I am what you think about me Cross me, please I'ma keep it Z, Zen Presence, bless Money can't buy sixth sense

Aesthetic: You give the vibes of Gods/Goddesses. Something to be admired, worship, prayed to. Not to be cross or even look into your eyes. Bow your head and not accessible to just anyone, only the chosen people can be in your presence.Something sacred. The energy is like a shrine, a stature in the forest, claimed be nature, vines and flowers grown all over it but when you stumbled upon it you cannot helped but admire the beauty of the stature. It's feel ancient, old, and depending on how people appoarch you or the intentions, they either get bless or curse by it.

Picture a scene, a person went hiking but they got lost. it's getting dark and the sun is setting, they are tired and desperate to go home. They have been walking forever and suddenly, they fell down. They are about to give up but something made them look up and when they did, there you are. A lost shrine in the middle of a clearing, the last ray of sun light reflecting on the stature. The hiker couldn't believe their eyes. They got up and decided to pray to this beautiful stature in the middle of no where, and what do you know, they got rescue not long after. That is your vibes Pile 3. You give off saviour vibes when you want to, it's depend on the other person really on how you'll be.

☀️ 🍉 ☁️ 🌤️ You Are Loved ☀️ 🍉 ☁️ 🌤️

Pile 4: 7 of Wands💫🏆Winner

Dragons Oracle card -7. Effort: Conquering your demons

Pile 4 who you are becoming is a defender

Defender of your rights, your ideas, your innocence, yourself. If you had a hard time standing up for yourself before, who you are becoming is someone who won't hesitate to speak up and share your opinion. You will speak up when you have something to say,for example, asking more questions at interview. The person you are becoming is someone who ask a lot of questions, another example is, in a classroom if you don't understand something you won't hesitate to ask the teacher to explain again, mainly because you are eager to learn and want to get it correct.

You have no problem exercising your boundary, telling people "you are crossing one of my boundary right now", No means no. And it's not just with other people, it seem you are firm with yourself as well. Maybe in the past you were quite lenient and letting yourself get away with procrastination but not anymore. You will keep yourself accountable. I keep getting inner dialogue with this pile, maybe you do this a lot with yourself. Like giving yourself pep talk when nervous. "you can do this, we said we're going for a run let's go and do this’ keeping to your own promises.

Words of affirmation might be your love language, if not it would be beneficial to you a lot by hyping yourself up everyday in the mirror. Tell yourself you can do this, whatever your goal is. Tell yourself you are beautiful and lovable.Those positive affirmations will help fight the other negative voices. The only voice that you should listen to the most is your own, and your own voice will be full of love, praise and encouragement, not judgment or harshness. Pile 4 you might have internalised what others say to you and mistaken it for your own voice but who you are becoming is more discerning to who you're going to listen to from now on.

However, at the start it will feels like climbing a hill and whenever you're speaking up, your voice might feel like it's getting lost in the wind. But you are also becoming someone who’s not easily backing down. Someone who is persistent. It's like when someone ask you, what you did say?, in the past you might go ,never mind, but now, you have no problem repeating loud and clear about your opinion. You have been working on your throat chakra and it is paying off.

As well you are becoming someone who is perseverance, determined, and not easily giving up.Your tolererance towards achieving your goals is becoming master level. So if you want to learn a new skills or enter a course you have no problem finishing them. Sticking through to them. For example, you downloaded a new editing software and it's something you're never use before, but you want to start creating beautiful video. You are becoming someone whose is determine to learn and master the skills and get the result that you want. it's like you're not settling, you have a vision in mind and you will achieving it no matter what obstacle coming your way.

Unstoppable is the word, it also remind me of the chariot energy. You won't stop until you get the result you're looking for Pile 4. Whatever it is your efforts will pay off. if you haven't seen it, the result will come in the near future 7 weeks. For example, you will get the grade you aim for in a test, your studying will not be in vain. Your videos will turn out like you vision it, those long night watching tutorials videos on how to edit will pay off. I want to reassure you that your efforts will definitely pay off, it’s 2 plus 2 equal 4, straightforward equations, effort equal result. There will be no other variables to offset your result. You will make sure of it. It's giving athlete vibes, preparing to enter a competition. Have you ever heard of a natural born leader Pile 4?. You are a natural born WINNER. You are born to win.

Signs: Red, Red Dragons, Henry, Victoria, nail and hammer, cupid, fire, 777, 77, 17, gold medal, running track, Olympic

Poems : Rightful Seat by @cant-find-my-name It is not the one that the most gifted That win It's the one that fight the hardest The one that never give up You think you are special But you lack consistentcy The secret sauce is Hard work is key Victory is never guarantee Unless you fight until the very end If you think you got it handled From the start Then don't be surprise If you didn't win Cause table can be turned And the throne will not just be given It is a place you need to earn

Songs : Gods by New Jean

(’ey) This is what you came for Blood on the game ball Everybody dropping like rainfall (‘uh’) This is your moment Eyes on the pulpit, kid (I) think Church just opened

And they’re singing your praises la-la-la Screaming your name out la-la-loud One more step, you’re Immortal now, ‘cause

Aesthetic: it's giving a track runner participating in an Olympic vibes. You are so foucs on your goal but you are not naive to the journey cause you have trained yourself for it. In fact, you are confident and excited to put all your preparation, what you trained for, to the test. This time it's not a training session, your energy gives ‘this is the real deal’ vibes. This is a competition where there are winners and losers.

You are crunching down, ready, set, waiting to hear the bang of the gun. The voices of the crowd is muffled, you can only hear your own heart beat so loud, beating in anticipation. You are in position, and Bang!💥 it's go time. Your body shot forward reflectively without thinking cause you had done this a hundred times before. Your head is empty, your eye forward in front of you, you are in the ZONE. You have been running, you ran and you ran and when there's an obstacle in front of you, you jumped over it with no hesitation.

In your peripheral vision, you notice another runner next to you trying to catch up or trying to distract you, but you pay them no mind. The real competition is within yourself.Your breath is becoming quicker, it's getting harder to breathe, but suddenly coming into view is a red tapes in front of you. The sight alone pushes you to use the last of your energy to cross that line, even though for a while the road ahead seems to stretch on forever, never ending. But now you can see the end and victory is yours. From the moment you were born into this earth, you've won.

☀️ 🍉 ☁️ 🌤️ You Are Loved ☀️ 🍉 ☁️ 🌤️

Check out @cant-find-my-name for more of my Original poetry or Follow my IG PoemNic🪲

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Thank you so much for being here🧡

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[badkitty3000]

I wrote this last night while a couple of drinks deep. My apologies if it's crap, but I figured I'd post it anyway 🤷‍♀️😂

So... I'm currently writing a new fic and something came to me.

What if FIVE was the one that ended up living in the crumbling Academy building after season 3 instead of Luther? He's all alone, he looks like a kid. His siblings tell him he can stay with them, but he has too much pride. He's a grown ass man... he's lived literal decades by himself. He'll be fine.

But he's not fine. He has no money. He has no credentials. He has no powers.

He is nothing and no one.

So, he goes to the only place he knows: The Umbrella Academy. It's a shit hole now. Caving in and barely recognizable anymore. But, it's still all too familiar.

He tries to go to his bedroom upstairs, but the stairs have fallen into disrepair and he can't blink anymore. So, he settles into the parlor, where they used to gather as kids and then later as adults. The bar is mostly intact, so that's a bonus.

He makes his bed on the dusty sofa, careful not to wrinkle or dirty his suit, lest one of his siblings sees him and takes pity on him. He sells off a few items that he can find, just so he'll have money for food and clothes. The rest he steals.

When he sees his family, ever so often, he lies. He tells them he's doing fine. Don't worry about him. He can take care of himself. Things are going well.

At night, though, when he's lying there in that drafty, musty old mansion, he remembers. He remembers all the torture Reggie put him through. All of the discipline and training and constant PERFECTION that was expected of him at all times comes flooding back. Like ghosts, his father's warnings start swooping down on him, one after the other, until he can't take it anymore.

He screams... covering his ears and his head to try and make them stop. Sometimes they do. Most times they don't.

He drinks. He drinks to numb the pain and the shame and the guilt that fills him up day after day. Night after night.

He hates it there. He's never hated a place so much in his entire life. And yet, he's trapped there again. A kid... stuck in that mansion... being loomed over by Reginald Hargreeves... and wishing to god he could leave and never come back.

But he did leave once. And it was the worst decision of his life.

So it's come full circle. An endless loop of misery and regret, starting and ending with the Academy.

And Five is DEVASTATED.

He can't show that on the outside, though. No, especially not to his family. He brushes off his suits, fixes his tie in the cracked mirror of the bathroom, polishes his dress shoes with an old dust rag of Grace's. And he joins them at whatever event they have invited him to.

Movie night. A picnic in the park. A birthday party.

He acts the part. Disguises his anguish with snark and satire. When they ask how he's doing, he scoffs, as if there could be any other answer. He's doing great. Amazing, in fact. Enjoying his life to the fullest, now that he doesn't have to run around saving the world.

Then he leaves them and goes back to the Academy. Back to the place where it all started. Back to the memories and the ghosts.

Five exists in the Academy because that's all he knows how to do now: exist.

[chloe-skywalker]

The Good Out Of The Bad - Cedric Diggory

Cedric x Fem!Reader Malfoy

Warnings: parents disowning child

Word count: 999

Summary: Being disowned by the Malfoys, Y/n goes to her boyfriend Cedrics home. The Diggorys are more than welcoming.

Authors Note: For sake of the story Cedrics moms alive. I don't know if she's alive or dead, they don't say in the movies and I haven’t read the books. Part 2? Maybe a run in with the Malfoys? Or he proposes? Or they go over to invite the Malfoys to their wedding? Comment below which one you’d like or should it be all of those.

Masterlist

Harry Potter Masterlist

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Y/n had possibly had the worst day of her life and all she wanted right now was Cedric. It was a long journey but she needed him right now. Once Y/n reached the Diggory residence she knocked on the front door.

“Y/n? What's wrong?” Cedric answered the door, shocked to see his girlfriend on the other side, soaked from the pouring rain. With her face red and blotchy.

“I was kicked out.” She hiccuped looking up at him with more tears gathering up in her eyes.

“Come in sweetheart. Its way to cold out.” Cedric’s mother says once she saw the girl she thought of as a daughter, having come to check on Cedric at the door. The older woman rushed Y/n into their home having her and Cedric sit on the couch. Cedric's mother and father joining them in the living room.

“What happened Y/n/n?” Cedric asked, wrapping a towel and a big heavy blanket around her trying to make sure she doesn’t get sick. He pulled her close into his side to comfort and protect her.

“I've been disowned. Name burned off of the family tree and everything.” Y/n told them with a shaky voice and a shiver. Whether it was from being drenched in the rain or the vent’;s she experienced with her family they didn’t know. But the guess was both.

Cedric rubbed a hand up and down her back trying to provide her with as much comfort as possible.

His parents were shocked to hear her words. How could they, then again something similar happened to Sirius Black back when they were younger.

“Why?” Cedric ask’s, curiously and angry at whatever reason they could give to do this to their own daughter.

“I disagreed on some views my father hold’s, and he decided that if I didn’t agree then I’m no longer a part of the Malfoy family.” Y/n took a deep breath as she told them she didn’t want to cry anymore. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know where else to go.” She apologizes to Cedric and his parents not wanting to be a burden.

“Don’t be sorry sweetheart.” Cedric's mom shakes her head, heartbreaking for the girl.

“You're always welcome in our home.” Cedric's dad tells her they'd never turn her away, especially after what she just went through.

“Thank you.” Y/n sends them an appreciative smile leaning into Cedric’s embrace.

“You can stay here for as long as you want.” Cedric's mother tells her as she notices Y/n relaxing into her son’s arms.

“I don’t want to be a burden.” Y/n shake’s her head looking at Cedric’s mom.

“You could never be a burden.” Cedric’s dad tells her not wanting her to think she was being a burden.

“Thank you.” Y/n nodds before leaving to go to the bathroom.

“Why would she think she’s a burden staying here?” His mother asked Cedric once hearing the bathroom door shut.

Cedric sighed sadly looking at his parents knowing they were gonna hate his explanation. “Her father- Luscious always called Y/n and Draco burdens. So it’s something she’s been told her whole life. She’s used to it.”

“That's not right.” His dad was appalled at hearing this.

“She’s welcome to stay her for as long as she want’s.” His mother tells him also appalled and upset that they would treat Y/n so poorly. No wonder she never wanted to be home.

“I’ll make sure she knows. And probably have to remind her.” Cedric nodd’s happy to hear that but also knowing she’d be safe with them helped washed away his worry. With that Cedruc got up to make sure Y/n was okay.

“We’ve always loved her.” Cedric’s mom smiled at her son as he left the room.

“Like a daughter.” His dad smiled at his wife, resting a hand on her shoulder standing next to her.

“She’s family.” his wife stated, an unspoken agreement between them that the girl would become even more a part of their family now than she already was.

^     ^     ^

Over the summer Cedric’s parents got to watch their son's relationship and behavior over the weeks and found it interesting to watch their son in his relationship. They got to see the two young adult’s grow even closer and their love grow bigger.

“We did a good job.” Cedric’s mother stated about how they raised their son.

“Yes we did.” His dad agreed watching beside his wife.

^     ^     ^

“Thank you for letting me stay all summer Mr. and Mrs Diggory.” Y/n thanked her boyfriend's parents with a smile having enjoyed her summer with them. They treated her like she was their daughter, their own flesh and blood.The way a family should be is what Y/n thought. But now it was time for them to go back to school for their final year. They were currently at the train station.

“It was a pleasure having you my dear.” Cedric’s dad hugged her after hugging his son, they enjoyed having her with them all the time she was the daughter they never had.

“We can’t wait to have you both back for christmas.” Cedric’s mom says excited and already missing the both of them. She hugged both of them at the same time.

Y/n smiled hugging her back just as tight. She loved being with the Diggory’s it was a big contrast to what she grew up with and she loved it. “I can’t wait.”

It was time for Cedric and Y/n to board the train. As they did they waved back at his parent’s before heading off hand in hand to find a seat together.

“I hope he marry’s her someday.” Cedric’s mother said out loud as she hugged her husband as they watched the train leave. Cedric’s dad let out an airy laugh even though he knew she was being completely honest and he hoped for the same thing in the future.

Taglist:

@padawancat97 @gruffle1 @daughter1of2anita3dearly

[veroinfaciem]

Ahhh thank you for the tag @physics-of-one-piece ❤🦩❤!! High five for the LOTR movies :D And I won't say anything about the pineapple on pizza, that war has been going on for too long, I respect your choices😔❤ What's the origin of your username? It's a play about my name, very in-the-face I would say xd *ba dum tss*

OTP(s)+shipname: ahhhhh I need to think hard about this one, my aroace ass don't ship characters enough to have an OTP usually 😂 but I'd say, eeeee maybe LawLu, Dofuwani and VerDof!

Favourite colour? As of now? Pink and orange.

Song stuck in my head: Yakuza 0- Karaoke: 24-hour Cinderella, Majima ver (help, I've been humming this since morning, it's playing on the loop in my head TvT)

Weirdest habit/trait: ohh I have so many xdddd not the weirdest probably, but I have a system of hanging laundry in a specific way and if someone will disrupt/change it I will eat their kneecaps

Hobbies: Drawing, mostly. Writing too. And everything manual - iron beads, small crafts, embroidery, making stickers - I'm juggling them like bounce balls :]

If you could have any job you wish, what would you have? Probably something that could merge drawing and my interests together, like a merch artist or concept artist, something like that. A creative field for sure, i love poking my brain and make my hands create stuff, whatever that might be.

Something you're good at: Drawing lol I'm a pretty okay cook too.

Something you hate: Sudden anger and violence, infantilization, not caring about other people at all. Also, I hate getting dirty with food so muuuch, the sensation is just sjhksjdhksadhaksjdas

Something you forget: I forget to answer messages TvT once the push notification is gone and I can't see it anymore I get distracted, forget, the time passes until it's hours/days/weeks later when I suddenly remember and am like shiiiiiiiiiiiit It gets better, it gets worse, I'm trying 💪

Your love language: Words of affirmation, quality time (+ respecting boundaries, being when it matters).

Favourite Movies/Shows: LOTR trilogy my beloved pspspsps Favourite show hmmmm Mob Psycho and Kekkai Sensen!

Favourite food: mochi with red bean paste; seasoned sushi rice with grilled salmon, asparagus/spinach, chopped cucumber and cheddar sauce

Favourite animal: dogs, whales, snails, elephant seals I love you all 😩❤

What were you like as a child? I read so many books!! Where is my attention span now, give it back, gimme

Favourite subject in school: Actually, it depends on the school. In the primary probably PE, later on hmmm physics and PE? In high school it'd be :insert native language:, history, art and.... PE 😂 I heard most people hate physical education, that the teachers were meh, I got lucky here I think.

Least favourite subject in school: civics and entrepreneurship/business class 'cause I learn mostly by experience/doing manual stuff and these were things based mostly on memorizing information.

What's your best character trait? I guess empathy and acceptance, I leave people to their own weirdness and stuff and respect that they can be different than me and that's okay.

What's your worst character trait? Not facing problems head-on.

If you could change any detail of your life right now, what would it be? A bit more peace of mind would be nice, less doubts 💪also, I'd really love to have a special bookcase for manga that could fit in my room 🤣❤❤

If you could travel in time, who would you like to meet? My dad and grandma.

Tagging time! As per usual - feel free to participate, feel free not to, no pressure whatsoever ❤ @flamboyant-vampire @tuquidflamingo @fanechkakwak @darklordofcutlets @mercyannmay @shzdoffy

Get to know mutuals 💞

tagged by @bankaizen ily so much ex-hubby

What’s the origin of your username? it started in the server where i believed 'little dove' would be one of doffy's go to pet names for his darling, then it morph into an oc for him named dove. basically i've made loving donquixote doflamingo my whole personality

OTP(s) + shipname: i'm more of an oc/canon shipper nowadays BUT bege/chiffon, frobin, zorobin, zolu, zolaw, are all GREAT ships

Favourite colour: PURPLE!!! and black of course

Song stuck in my head: How Bad Do U Want Me by Lady Gaga. i've been obsessed with it tbh

Weirdest habit/trait: i literally never stop picking my fingers. it's more than a nervous habit bc i do it even when i'm not nervous. it's why i use fake press on nails religiously bc it is the only thing that actually deters me from completely picking my nails to the point i draw blood

Hobbies: singing, gaming, reading, want to pick playing guitar back up too bc i haven't in a long time

If you could have any job you wish what would you have? i really don't YEARN any particular career any longer bc i'd rather just... not BUT i have always wanted to work in a museum or just anything having to do with fossils. as a kid, i always wanted to be a paleontologist

Something you’re good at: my job 💞 even when i feel like i'm not doing a good job i always get a pat on the back for a job well done

Something you hate: peanut butter, shit is fucking DEESGUSTIN

Something you forget: i forget to call my parents sometimes and i always feel so bad bc i don't get to see them that often anymore

Your love language: words of affirmation to the EXTREME. pls tell me you love me and that i'm pretty and that you need me and that you love me and that i'm pretty and-

Favourite movies/shows: ONE PIECE!!!! best thing i've ever decided to watch. my fave movies of all time are jurassic park, pacific rim, and aliens. basically big monster movies my beloved.

Favourite food: PASTA. and also burgers.

Favourite animal: PENGUINS!!!!!! and also hippos, horses, and foxes

What were you like as a child? attached to my mom at the hip. i did not want to be around anyone else tbh.

Favourite subject in school: english and probably science

Least favourite subject: math and pe literally wanted to die bc i was a fat kid and couldn't keep up so i got made fun of a ton for it

What’s your best character trait: i'm a fierce friend, i don't do a lot of defending for myself, i usually just brush things off, but if my friends are upset i will LEAP and defend them and FIGHT for them if i need to

What’s your worst character trait? i constantly feel like everyone hates me far too often, and i can't stand the feeling of being left out. it consumes me that everyone is just doing better and happier without me, and i let those thoughts become my reality and i operate as if everyone truly believes the things my brain came up with

If you could change any detail of your life right now, what would it be? i might take college a little more seriously and actually gone for something that could have made me more money but.... then i never would have met my soulmate that i've spent a decade with so... i truly believe everything happens for a reason

If you could travel in time, who would you like to meet? i honestly don't have a great answer lol

tagging: @shinjihirakos @mandiemegatron @nina-ya @shanalikeanna @physics-of-one-piece @eussstasss

[dappercritter]

So... Revenge of the Kongs now, eh?

[jq37]

Descendants: The Rise of Red is kind of a bizarre movie to talk about critically because, imo, it almost doesn't make sense to talk about it in the usual terms of good vs bad or enjoyable vs not enjoyable when the way more obvious tension is finished vs unfinished.

Because, more than any other movie I've ever seen, it does *not* read as a full movie. And I don't mean in a "this movie has a cliffhanger" kind of way. The Empire Strikes Back and Across the Spiderverse fit that description. They end on big dramatic cliffhangers that point to a resolution in the third installment.

But Rise of Red just sets all this stuff up and then...ends without concluding anything. It doesn't feel like the first movie in a trilogy (or duology). It feels like the first act of a two-act musical. It very specifically reminds me of the end of the first act of Into the Woods where all the main characters sing the song Ever After about how they all fixed their problems with magic and nothing bad will ever happen to them again and then the narrator ominously says "To be continued" before the curtain drops. But in Into the Woods you know there's a second act and this movie wasn't sold as the first act of a bigger story. Like sure, it has the, "You didn't think this was the end" tag at the end like all the other movies, but those movies were complete, self-contained stories even though they had sequels. This was NOT a full story. It's half of one story.

Like, if we're supposed to take this as a full story, there are so many bizarre choices:

Why did they make sure to mention that Cinderella and Charming fell in love at the ball at the top if it wasn't meant to set up Back to the Future style, "Oh no, I accidentally got my mom banned from the ball so she's not gonna fall in love with Dad and I won't be born" shenanigans?

Why did Maddox very pointedly have that bit about "you could lose your mom completely" if that was never going to come into play? Red never did anything to endanger Bridget or endanger her own birth so it doesn't make sense as a warning in that way.

Why was there all this focus on this Carrie on prom night moment for Bridget if we LITERALLY NEVER SAW CASTLECOMING? Why dance around this moment and talk about it all cloak and dagger with no specificity if they weren't building up to some big reveal that it wasn't as straightforward as it seemed? And like, they leaned in HARD with making Bridget the nicest, sweetest, cotton candy princess as a teen so I need WAY more than, "She got pranked by known bullies she's been enduring with a smile very handily up to this point" to buy that she went from that to "murderous dictator". And even if she did become murderous, I find it insanely hard to believe that she'd include her best and only friend on the list of people she wants to suffer unless there was a betrayal. I find it INSANE that there wasn't a falling out scene at any point in this movie with how thickly they were laying on the admiration and camaraderie.

(Note: And adult Cinderella def has guilty vibes re: the Queen at orientation. Which I know I'm not imagining because it's literally spelled out in the Jr Novelization!)

Before the time travel element of the movie started, I thought they were going for something like they go to the past and realize that Bridget was bullied not by the VKs but by the spoiled royals, and Ella ends up joining in the bullying once she gets with Charming, betraying Bridget and justifying her whole "Love Ain't It" philosophy. Or Ella ditching her at the last minute to be with Charming meaning she has to deal with the monster prank alone and it was the being alone rather than the prank itself that hurt her (though that is NOT a good enough reason to go all off with their heads on your subjects). The fact that, as far as we know right now, it literally was just a relatively mild and reversible prank that caused all of this is just, such flat storytelling, you know?

But! All of this makes way more sense if this is meant to be the first act of a single contained story. And I don't wanna be all "Pepe Silvia, secret good 4th episode of Sherlock" about this but I did see this picture:

Which seems to indicate that this was written as a Part One. Which, if so, idk why they wouldn't advertise it that way but whatever. The point is, if that's the case then it means that we're potentially in bad pacing territory rather than straight up bad storytelling territory. Because this isn't a bad place to be halfway through your story:

The heroes, warned that time travel is dangerous, have gone back in time to change the heart of a brutal tyrant before she can stage a coup. They seemingly succeed in their mission and when they come home, everything is great! But then, the side effects of time travel start to catch up with them. Chloe realizes that, in breaking the vase, she prevented her mother from going to the ball and falling in love with her dad (who was conspicuously absent from the final scene btw) which means she's starting to be forgotten and erased from the timeline. And Red realizes that though this new version of her mom is as sweet and kind as the teen she once met, she's a complete stranger to her (fulfilling the Hatter's warning that she could lose her mom completely). So they have to go back in time once more to make sure the Ella and Charming fall in love again, perhaps at the cost of whatever bad thing that happened to Bridget happening again and bringing back the original version of her future self. But, now with more context of how her mom became that way, Red can now talk to her mother and persuade her to give people another chance.

Boom, that gives us time to go back and hit everything we haven't yet hit. We can pay off the time travel tropes that were set up but not explored. We can go to Castlecoming which feels so obviously set up to be the centerpiece of this story (like, come on, Back to the Future literally does the school dance thing. This is Time Travel Storytelling 101). We can actually get info about what the prank was and why it affected Bridget so completely.

(Note: This is a side thing but it really strikes me as so crazy that Bridget would so SUCH a big 180 here. Like, I know the Queen of Hearts is a silly, goofy, campy villain, but she straight up murders people and there's no way to get around that if we're taking her out of the surreal story she comes from and putting her in a (comparatively) grounded story. If I wasn't doing a betrayal plot, I would make the twist that the spell that turned Bridget into a "monster" didn't just have a physical effect, it had a mental effect and it magically twisted her personality to be the way it is now. So they broke the physical half of the curse, but neglected the other half and it's been festering the whole time, turning her as evil as she was sweet. Because like, a simple physical transformation isn't that big of a deal to have such heavy security--Bridget made cupcakes with a transformative effect and that was totally fine. I'm not saying that that's what's gonna be the case. I just think it would be an explanation that makes sense for why she changed so crazy much that makes more sense than a simple prank or even a betrayal. Her mom wasn't even evil! How did she go from zero to murder without even an evil mom to push her onto the path? But I'm super digressing right now.)

(Note #2: OK, one last thing. The trap on the book presumably would have hit the VK's and trapped them in Merlin's office regardless of what Chloe and Red did, right? That's like, net zero influence on the timeline. I genuinely can't tell if that's a straight up plot hole or set up to be like, "Oh no. Actually when she said that she was turned into a monster in front of everyone it was meant in a less literal way." Like she was just made to look bad and that was the real thing that pushed her over the edge. Like idk. It really feels like the only thing they really did that would change the timeline was get Ella banned from the dance and presumably out of the way where she couldn't hurt Bridget. OK NOW I'm done.)

Anyway, my point is that this is not how I would have structured my movie and I think this was a super weird way to go into the second era of Descendants movies, but they can still tell a complete story if that's their plan. I'm genuinely really curious to see if this pans out to be a fairly competently told story that just happens to be split over two movies or a complete fumbling of the narrative bag because it could really be either at this point and it's fascinating to me.

[wildsaltair]

the way Gladiator is just instant gratification for me. my serotonin levels shoot through the roof as soon as that first note of music hits. Maximus’ face appears onscreen and I immediately am launched into a catatonic state

[franollie]

bring back technicolor and practical effects now im so serious

[heymacy]

💛

[sallykie]

I've decided. I don't like the HTTYD movie sequels' xenophobia era. I don't think the themes should have gone that way.

[vraska-theunseen]

im genuinely so frustrated right now the way i always am about this one thing but i can't even sustain the misery right now because i've never been able to come up with any kind of answer no matter how many miserable drafts i write and hours i stay up thinking so it's just making me laugh how the posts im writing to keep in my drafts keep turning into my fucking. autobiography. "...i remember a stage kiss with a tall girl in theater camp (her name was ashley or jennifer or something she could do the splits)" that's literally so funny. jennifer or ashley do you remember playing spin the bottle at the arden theater camp in 6th grade it's apparently pretty core for me

[thesoftboiledegg]

Since the Hogwarts Legacy narrative was "haha jkr's not involved or making any money from this, go ahead and buy it, she's going to be SO PISSED when you buy the deluxe edition 🤪", how much do you want to bet that the TV series narrative is going to be "haha look at this [woke thing in the show], jkr is OUTRAGED, the series is roasting her right to her face, it was all a coordinated effort to take her down, hurry up and subscribe to Max!!! 🤪", pretending to forget that she's an executive producer?

...in fact, thinking about it now, I'm not convinced that WB didn't have trolls/bots spreading that false information about JKR somehow not making any profit from Hogwarts Legacy. Even people I know in real life fell for it, and one of them is almost twice my age!

[persefoneshalott]

i don't watch biopics so this might be something they do a lot, I just think if you aren't going to be faithful at least go more fun, just make her Cathy or Heathcliff in this

[luvcaleb]

SHH... WE CAN'T GET CAUGHT.

nsfw (18+). includes fingering, breast play, dirty talk, huge cock, unprotected sex, creampie, fwb relationship (it's pretty obvious you like each other tho), mentions of your first time experience with caleb (and other times after that), having sex when another person is just a few rooms away, too much cum, slight praise kink. filthy, filthy, filthy smut from top to bottom. likes and reblogs will be very helpful !!

“Shh... you don't want Gran hearing us, do you?”

You're covering your mouth to stifle your whimpers, but there's no hiding the wet squelches beneath the blanket. You wrap your hand around Caleb's flicking wrist, his fingers buried deep inside your cunt. When he adds another digit, a loud cry of his name is pulled out of you.

Caleb presses a soft kiss against your nape. You're both turned on your sides, your back against his solid chest. “As much as I like hearing you say my name, it'd be a problem if someone came to interrupt us. Remember the last time?”

The last time he's referring to is your risky tryst from a few days back; Caleb joined you in your bath, claiming he wants to “wash your back” for you. As expected, 20% of your time was spent in a relaxing soak where he massaged your shoulders and washed your hair, and the remaining 80% was spent with his head between your legs, coaxing out wave after wave of cum with his fingers and tongue.

The tip of his cock was already inside you when a knock on your door interrupted you, your grandmother asking if you knew where Caleb went because he wasn't in his room. Needless to say, you had to stop what you were doing and Caleb had a difficult time sneaking out of the bathroom.

“That... mmph... and this... is all your fault...” you struggle to say while biting back your moans as he grinds his fingers against a good spot, his thumb flicking at your clit. Caleb has always been too good with his hands. “You always—ah!—do this even when there are other people around...!”

“You wanna know why?” Chuckling, Caleb leans closer to whisper to your ear, lips brushing over your soft skin. “You squeeze me so fucking tight when we're about to get caught.”

You gush around his fingers as he mouths on the shell of your ear, moaning into the palm of your hand. He hums in satisfaction, pulling out his hand from your panties to admire the stringy release between his fingers. “You always cum too fast, pipsqueak. You pent up these days?”

How on earth could you possibly be pent up when you've been fucking Caleb at every opportunity? Every time you're left alone at the house, he fucks you against any flat surface he can find—the door when he's too impatient to go to your room, the bathroom sink because he likes making you watch yourself in the mirror when he's fucking you stupid, and even ate you out on the kitchen countertop at some point.

But the thing is, Caleb is undaunted by the possibility of being caught. So even when your Gran is around, he sneaks into your bedroom to fool around, just like what he's doing now under the pretense of “we watched a horror movie today, aren't you scared to sleep alone?”

Evidently, Caleb has no intention of letting you sleep tonight. He fondles your tits beneath your shirt, the tent in his sweatpants grinding against your clothed ass. “Don't pretend like you're innocent,” he mutters, making you yelp when he pinches your nipple. “You strutted around all day wearing my shirt without a bra, bending down in front of me on purpose... Did you know how hard it was to hold back from fucking you on the spot?”

“T-that was...!” Your cheeks flush with warmth. Sure, you were kind of riling him up on purpose, but that was under the assumption you'd be alone tonight.

“This ass...” he rubs you above your shorts, groaning as he palms at the soft flesh. “...was in my mind the entire fucking day. I held myself back until now, but I can't hold back anymore, fuck.”

He strips you off of your clothes, only leaving his shirt scrunched up above your breasts. He pulls down his sweatpants, and you feel his huge cock slap against your lower back, his pre-cum smearing across your skin. He holds the back of your knee to raise your leg, positioning his cock to your soaked pussy.

“Been waiting for this for so fucking long... Oh, shiiit,” he moans, long and drawn out and dirty as he slides right home, the tip of his dick pounding at your cervix. You squeal into your hand, your cunt clamping down on his cock so tightly but it doesn't deter his fast pace at all.

He reaches so deep like this, hitting spots he normally couldn't when you're in missionary. His huge cock feels like it's carving its own space into your body, coring you out from the inside, and it feels so good that you can't hold back your voice at all.

“Nn... Don't do that,” Caleb pulls away your hand from your mouth when he notices you biting down on your skin to hide your moans. He replaces it by putting his fingers in your mouth, cooing softly to your ear, “Suck. You're going to hurt yourself.”

You suck on his fingers, eyes rolling back to your head as he continues to pound you, fucking your pussy so good. Only Caleb knows how to make you feel so much pleasure to the point you can't think properly anymore. Your fingers could never hope to reach the places his cock touches.

It's how this twisted relationship started in the first place, Caleb catching you touching yourself when you forgot to lock your door. He taught you how to make yourself cum because you didn't know anything, until all you knew was him and his cock. But he was too big the first time you took him in that he had to fuck you loose with four fingers, sucking and licking at your pussy to make you wet enough to accept his thick girth and length. Now, he could slide inside you easily, your body having taken his shape.

Caleb stares at your messy face, utterly endeared. “Fuck, you're so fucking cute...” He takes out his fingers from your mouth, using them to tilt your jaw to meet his lips. He kisses you sloppy, no finesse as you slide your tongue against his, moaning into each other's mouths.  “Mm... open your mouth more... yeah, that's it, baby... good fucking girl...”

“Ah, fuck, Caleb!” you sob, desperately rocking against his cock. “I'm gonna cum, cumming, I can't anymore...!”

“You're gonna cum?” Caleb stops thrusting, making you whine and attempt to move yourself, but he holds onto your hips and pushes you into the mattress, laying you flat on the sheets on your front. He settles behind you, using his weight to pound you to the mattress harder. “Then fucking cum.”

You moan uncontrollably into the pillows, completely forgetting you're meant to stay quiet. Caleb fucks his cock harder, faster, deeper, failing to hold back his own grunts as you tighten up around him, wet heat melting around his dick. “Shit, I'm gonna cum too... I'm gonna cum hard in your slutty fucking pussy... fuck, I'm cumming!”

You squirt around his cock as he fills you up with cum, your fluids making a mess between your bodies and the sheets. You don't realize you're crying out up until Caleb grabs your chin and kisses you once more, muffling the lewd moans you're letting out while he's still cumming inside you, hot and thick. He gives you tiny, slowing thrusts, cock still spurting out semen. “Oh, baby, you did so good...” he sucks on your bottom lip, staring intently at your orgasm face. “Such a good fucking girl for me...”

“So... full...” is the only thing you can say, feeling the sheer volume of one load of his cum in your pussy, warming you from the inside.

“Not full enough, baby.” Caleb peppers your face with kisses. It is then that you realize—with no small amount of fear and arousal—his cock hasn't softened at all. “I still have a lot to give you.”