#but i have plans about my next submissions so it doesnt feel as like im putting all the weight onto one

[loverboydotcom]

submissions are weird cause when you look at this table it doesnt look like a lot beyond it being a long time but those six rejections had me feeling like i was dragging myself through mud

[krabmeat]

𝟷𝟶𝟶 𝚏𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚘𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚜? 𝚝𝚘𝚍𝚊𝚢? 𝚊𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚝𝚒𝚖𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚠𝚎𝚎𝚔? 𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚍 𝚘𝚏 𝚢𝚎𝚊𝚛?

HELL YEAH FELLAS YOU HEARD THAT RIGHT!! FIRST MAJOR MILESTONE BAYBEEEE LETS GOOOOOO!!

guys, i really dont think you see how insanely mental this is. like what?!?! i joined here cause a friend of mine was gushing about a writer here and eventually convinced me to get tumblr. they called me their "noob reading friend /affectionate" and now look at me!! not even a year in and ive gained a crowd? thats so damn cool to think about!! to think that this many people are willing to put aside time in their day to read some fics made by me, im floored man!! all in all though, i have no one to thank but my wonderful mutuals and followers who have helped floor and construct the fantastic beginnings of this blog. which is why im here to bring you all this event that i sincerely hope you guys enjoy!

🦑KRABS KAN MAKE WRITING EVENTS WOW!!🦑

ALRIGHT FELLAS, IM DOING A WRITING EVENT!! HERES THE RULES AND PROMPTS NOW BOSSMEN!

~rules~

only 2 people per prompt

despite me not writing romantic fics yet, all participants are absolutely welcome to!

no smut/nsfw, im not that kind of blog and i do plan on reading entries so please dont submit anything related!!

any and all fics glorifying and supporting bigoted or misogynistic ideals will not be tolerated or respected. this is non-negotioable but if the fic has any of this that results in the putting down of or generally recognizing these ideals as negative then that is completely fine!

you are to use the quote prompts in your fic (im gonna be loose on this though so dw!! :DD)

you can use as many different prompts as youd like!!

please keep submissions in mcyt territory as thats who i write for most. but this doesnt confine to just mcyts in the dsmp! go wild dudes, hermitcraft, third life, pop off!!

keep all fics for minors platonic and platonic ONLY

generally know and respect the boundaries for ccs

when asking for a prompt, please put who you will be writing for!!

TAG ME IN YOUR FICS!! I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH PLEASE ID ADORE IT IF YOU TAGGED ME SO I CAN READ YOUR WONDERFUL WORK!!

you can use and interpret the prompts any way you want! doesnt matter if its in the angst section, you see fluff potential? go for it, vice versa!!

~prompts~

~fluff~

"I swear, if you make us late one more time I'll tape a clock to your wrist." "Isnt that a watch-?" "Shut it!"

"Look! I think it likes me!" (@ohworm-writes with cc!beeduo)

"Man, how did I catch such a good person?"

"Yknow, your parents really did something great when they made you."

"WELL HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT WOULD HAPPEN?!" "THERE ARE WARNING LABELS RIGHT THERE!"

"Take a picture, itll last longer~" "Okay!" "Wait you actually did that-?"

"That does NOT fit you." "Yeah it does! Just gotta roll it up a bit!"

"You aren't 'built different', you're just stupid." (@ohworm-writes with cc!tommy @jschllatt with cc!sapnap

"If it ever happens again, tell me. You know i adore you."

"Well..they dont even deserve you anyways! Just look at you- gorgeous!!"

~angst~

"KEEP F*CKING WALKING, THEN! CANT EVEN FACE YOUR OWN DAMN PARTNER! (or friend! :])"

"No, youre amazing!" "Then why arent i treated like it?"

"Do it again, see if i care."

"Guys..? GUYS! THEY ARENT MOVING!"

"Put the damn drink down and talk to me!"

"Its about time you get whats due, you know."

"So not only do you think im stupid, but you also think im still naive?"

"Just take me seriously for once in your damn life!"

"You'd better start running in the next 5 seconds."

"What do you take me for, a joke?!" "Wasnt that obvious?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

now that thats done, heres the ask game part of the event!!! send me the corresponding emoji in my ask box and ill respond!

👽~ ill tell you a weird or memorable occurance that has happened on tumblr between friends and moots!

😳~ ill kin assign you and try to guess who you kin! (friends and moots only)

🍒~ ill rate your blog aesthetic on a scale of 1-10

🥀~ ill give you a bunch of emojis that remind me of you! (friends and moots only)

😎~ ill tell you obscure things i think are very neat!

🌺~ ill tell you a random interesting fact i know!

🦑~ if you send me a description of yourself, personality etc then ill write you a short ship fic with a mcyt!! specify if you want it to be platonic or romantic and if you want it to be c! or cc!(this is to work on my romantic writing!! friends and moots only)

💃~ ill tell you songs that remind me of you! (friends and moots only)

📕~ ill tell you something small or obscure i secretly think about you! (friends and moots only)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

now...onto the final part- HONOURABLE MENTIONS!!!

@myceliummenace ~ these guys got me into tumblr, some of my closest friends and theyve been supporting me since day one. i couldnt be happier to breathe the same air as these guys, they all deserve a crown and if you disagree i will chomp your hand

@niceimafan ~ an absolute saint!! i came across inks former writing blog and fell in love with both them and their wonderful work /p!!!! theyve helped me through some hellish times and are all around so damn open and accepting

@jschllatt ~ istfg this lady is just-- SOOOO BEAUTIFUL INSIDE AND OUT??? nat is incredibly talented and has encouraged me throughout my time here and i couldnt be happier with how weve grown as friends!! and i know, despite how wholesome and soft nat seems to be i promise you she knows how to keep a bit going like no other. an amazing moot, stay funky :]

@im-an-ungodly-mess ~ okay look,, i know i havent interacted with these guys for a lot buttt...CAN YOU REALLY BLAME ME??!!? LIKE CMON THEYRE ALL JUST SO COOL!!! the moment i met them i knew our chaotic energies would merge and boy did they merge alright. also theyre just insanely nice and super willing to endulge with me in my random interest which is always a sexy trait to have. 10 out of 10, these guys are neato

@ohworm-writes ~ ahhh wormmm, delightful all around and just a sweetheart....BUT THEYVE GOT SHENANIGANS- as well as being extremely skilled as well like, dayummm!!! i live for our bond over fandoms outside of the mcyt fandom and i feel blessed to have you be a moot! much love, dear!

@marcooze ~ bro....whyd you have to do me like that dude? being so gosh damn kind and accepting like that like sheesh all the stuff you reblog is gold!!! it can be the most cracked out post or the most serious and informational one. idgaf that youre a reblog blog, you mean the world to me and i shall place a supple kiss on your hand as bros do <3

@ramzawrites ~ THE FIRST WRITERS BLOG IVE EVER FOLLOWED!!! ramza dear, if no one has ever told you how iconic you are then PLEASE LET ME BE THE FIRST!!! everything you do leaves me in awe and despite your talent, you still have miles and miles of kindness and generosity? you are one in a million, ramza. you deserve everything and please know how much you mean to me. thank you for supporting me so much for so long, and i hope your days are filled with really cool rocks :]]

[fart-gate]

SG1

Season 4 episode 8

"THE FIRST ONES"

Notes by me

- the thumbnail is a lizard man

- the BANDANA

- archeologist! Daniel

- "sg11, archeologist survey, P3X 888, dig site 5" is it bad i thought it was sexy when he did this

- I paused it on the fossil and it looks like it had wings???

- Cleo lol

- so the goaulds werent parasites a few million yrs ago. Good to know

- robert rothman is bossy as hell

- old goaulds did NOT have naquada in their dna

"Thats significant"

"How so?"

"I have no idea"

💖💖💖💖

- 🎵sometimes I feel like...somebodys WATCHIN MEEEE🎵

- omg Daniel one punch and your down. Need to have more combat training with tealc buddy

- Daniel gets kidnapped YET AGAIN

- rothman yelling for Daniel was nice actually

- an unas!!! From the viking episode

- hopefully this one doesnt sound like james earl jones

- sg1 said oh Daniel in trouble? I already have my boots on lets go

- P3X 888 is where the goaulds originated? Didnt we already try looking for a homeworld?

- I thought the unas growling was Daniel snoring for like a hot sec ok im tired leave me alone

- apparently nobody likes rothman and yeah i get it hes annoying

- tealc is lead on this one! Master tracker

- "rest!....it means.......rest"

- "grrrrr rest" the stargate programs professional linguist everyone

- love Daniel just talking to himself

- "yes! Very refreshing! ok im good for the next ten miles"

- his eyes are piercingly blue for my pleasure only

- forest sets are my favorite btw

- 2 moons thats so cool why doesnt earth have 2 moons we're missin out

- why does he have 2 phones???

- oh its a recorder

- daniel recording himself: this creature has dragged me around for hours and wants to eat me. But other wise we've become great pals < 3

- "juvanile" he got kidnapped by a teenager akdndjd

- im sorry his eyes are so distracting

- OKAY OKAY when it growls at him and he puts his head down to be submissive hhhhrrrrnnnngggggg

- SHE SPEAKS!

- daniel could make friends with a rat and it would show him all their rat friends and rat culture. I got away with that metaphor but you know what I mean. He could make friends with anything

- I just CANT get over how pretty he looks in this ep??? You thought I wouldnt keep talkin about it??? U were wrong

- this unas whole costume is so cool

- daniel: *tries to drink by dipping face in water*

Unas: what were you raised in a barn?? Use your hands idiot

- how is he swimming with his hands tied

- that goauld came at him like a torpedo

- ok! The unas said you get goauld guts all over your face for being an idiot

- ka means no

- well now hes gonna be wet forever (👀)

- is hawkins the leader of sg11?

- of course Jack sits RIGHT next to the goauld infested lake!!! Of course!!

- ah my favorite. Spit roasted parasite

- needs salt

- unas: this is my cave

Daniel: LOVE what youve done with the place

- hot potato with a goauld head ajdjs

- "yes yes all the kids are playing this these days OOPS in the fire!"

- at least he made him laugh

- why every time one culture shares food with earth its always chocolate?? Why not idk fuckin??? Pringles???

- oh its a cliff bar

- alright. He didnt have to sexually moan while eating a cliff bar BUT he sure did

- this unas is very curious

- "I met my father in law like this" OOF movie reference

- btw the guy that plays the unas?? Amazing 10/10

- ah shit hawkins has a GOUALD!!!!

- the unas have cave drawings ooooo

- daniel recording himself: me and the unas are besties now

Unas: *draws picture of him dragging Daniel to his doom*

Daniel : ......nevermind

- can tealc sense the goauld in the lake?

- when he shoots it out of the air. Invented sexy

- Sam can only sense the ones with naquada!!! This is really cool plot

- jaffa are unblendable. I wonder if the other guy that was immune had what jaffa have

- daniel about to kill him with a large rock and then his chaotic morals take charge again

- btw no glasses Daniel has been here for almost the whole ep

- "its been a hoot"

- WHEN HE PUTS HIS HEAD DOWN 👀👀👀👀👀👀

- "anybody with a snake in their heads, raise your hand!"

- see!?!?! Tealc with the plans im tellin ya

- rothman too damn.

- that guy pronouncing goauld like "goo-ahld" ????

- "this way" *points to a sign that says 'this way'

- hurry up!! Daniel about to get consumed by reptilians!!

- aw hes protecting him!

- Daniel speak Big Lizard Man language now

- "we've communicated, we're friends!"

- LIZARD BRAWL

- KING LIZARD BOY!!!

- "dan-yeeeell??" Oh no oh no I'm crying he wants to keep him

- "sha-ah-ka" he liked Daniel bc Daniel said the word for their moon god ok I get it now

- "whats that mean?"

"I have no idea....but I think ive just been invited to come back one day and find out" 💖😭 best friends with lizard people

~

Whump under the cut

Daniel jackson whump: knocked out,dragged, kidnapped, waking up,hands tied, out of breathe, collapsing, flinching, exausted, leg swiped, fell over onto back, cut on face, bloody cheek, fear, more flinching, noises!, almost sacrificed to lizard ppl

BONUS:

Jack and sam whump: hands tied, less than 10 min

🤓no glasses!Daniel for 99% of episode!

🎶listening to Youve Got A Friend In Me by Randy Newman🎶 bc Daniel and the Unas are besties and I think im funny

[wilkoak]

bad times today, ignore if not interested.

Hiya banter time again as I feel probably the worst in my life rn. It’s just emotions but hey, it’s real and it fucking hurts. Todays count: 1. fuck friendzone, lets be enemies after all 2. almost molested by a guy 3. then fucked over gaian by ex trying to seek shelter after previous thing. 

Remember me being broken up with amicably? So yeah, apparently fuck that. I’ve received a calm and calculated message about not contacting her at all from my ex. Cancelling plans, basically deleting everything we agreed on to keep ourselves (from her initiative!) not that sad after breakup since we’re in foreign country so some support would be good. Tbh it comforted me a lot to think i could still have a friend, BUT it was also hurtful in a way. I wanted to endure though  adnd worked on letting go in romantic sense. 

But nah. A decsion has been made again without consulting me. She set the boundaries, as always. And now i feel betrayed, promises about friendship canceled because someone had worse mood today. And was just an egoist. 

So what happened next? it wasnt that bad, i called a friend, cried a bit again, decided to move on with more aggression (good!) but then.. what happened is that because it happened while I was at work, a guy noticed it and kidn of took upon himself to cheer me up. He talked with me, wise stuff, nice chat really. Felt genuine. 

But what happened is he of couse had to try to invite himself to me. He stayed and helped me close shop. He asked if he can walk me home. 

And of course, me idiot with no ecperience, took it as the intention. Because i was so emotionally drained and actually felt better with company. 

And of course I ended up being hugged ad smooched and generally fucking lightly sexually molested in front of the house. Good point is that at least when i finally told him that no, stop, he apologised and went away. But it was far from consensual. He touched my hair as well  before but at this point, I was too tired and numbed to react.

What happened next is i actually because I went to... her house instead of mine, with him. To avoid him knowing where I live, while I still had the Keys so i could pretend well enought. I thought: fuck, im scared, i dont care, girls there know me, ill just explain no matter if i meet her or her neighbours. 

Well. I did that. I then wanted to come in for a moment, wait it out, and go, or maybe apologize and go. Or maybe cry for a minute and go. what happened insted is my ex held the door (had to beg her to open), after lettinmg in she was super cold and agressive and unsympathetic, commandered me to stop crying or gtfo, threw a fit in the end and we ended on very bad note. I felt the more worst because i know i really did disturb her evening. But i know i would not be this awul in a situaton like that, fuck, for the most hated person I know. 

I just saw today how much she fucking doesnt care if its not conveniet for her and that really hurts. I also have the amazing memroy of being touched and kissed on cheek by a half-hobo and the awaeness of how fucking stupid i played out the whole evening. 

In my defense, I am a mess and been trained to submission in decisions for years. I... fuck this. Fuck this all, I want to go home. 

[reesewestonarchive]

chapter nine / rem belongs to @forlornraven / masterpost / mature content

Nakoa wakes to darkness. He finds out easily that he’s in a vehicle; the rumble of tires beneath him, the loud, high-pitched squeal of rubber on asphalt.

The hard, unforgiving feel of metal against his shoulder. He opens his eyes, but it makes no difference. He sees slivers of light, but nothing really. Nakoa blinks, once, twice, and, when he turns over, finds himself grateful for the lack of light, because just the slivers of daylight peeking through are enough to send spikes through his brain.

“You awake?” He jolts at the sound of a voice, relaxes when Rem adds, “Hey, it’s just me.” His words are near slurring, though. Nakoa spins his head to look for him, nervous, worried, but it’s impossible to see in the darkness. “I—” Rem huffs a frustrated breath. “Can’t see a fucking thing—where are you?”

One of Rem’s boots finds Nakoa’s ribs. He mutters an apology, then says, “Hang on—” before he reaches down, his hand skirting along Nakoa’s back until he reaches Nakoa’s hands, clasped behind him. “Hold still.”

The ties release after just a second, and when Nakoa pulls them up, he asks, “How the fuck did you get out of them?” The plastic rubbed his wrists raw, even as short as they were on.

He can hear Rem’s grin in his voice when he speaks, though, and his presence makes the dark, unforgiving trcuk a little less foreboding. “You think I leave the motel without a knife?”

Nakoa would laugh, if he could. Instead, he reaches a hand out, trying to find Rem in the dark. “Where—” he says, before he makes contact with Rem’s knee. Relief settles in his stomach, and he reaches out for Rem’s hand, squeezes it. Feels better already when Rem squeezes back.

“You okay?” Nakoa asks. “That looked.” Bad. Terrible. Nakoa sees it no matter where he looks, Rem lying on the asphalt like that.

“Mm.” But his voice sounds far away. “Nakoa.”

“Yeah.”

“What the fuck?”

Nakoa should have known, knows he should have. That he should have said something to Rem, but… “My father’s—” The word tastes bitter on his tongue. “…in imports.”

“Drugs,” Rem says, immediately. “Fucking hell, Nakoa.”

It’s how Nakoa got started. It’s why he kept going with them. Michael’s into more than just weed, though, and therein lies the problem. That Nakoa knows. Michael had beat him, when Nakoa found out, and has since used his strength to his advantage. Try as he might, Nakoa can only throw a punch if he’s catching someone off guard, if they can fight worse than he can.

Michael doesn’t fit the bill, and he’s always carrying.

“I didn’t have a choice!” Nakoa says. “And I thought. Maybe, if I wasn’t there… why would he waste a bunch of bullshit on me? Men, resources.” Why would he follow Nakoa across the country? Nakoa, of all people?

“You stole from him,” Rem says. His voice comes out flat. “Nakoa.”

“You don’t get to play like you wouldn’t have done the same fucking thing,” he says, tone sharp. He pulls back from Rem, smells blood on his hands as he wipes them down his face. “How often have you stolen whiskey?”

“It’s legal! You wanna compare that to coke?”

Exhausted, suddenly, Nakoa says, “I really need you to not fucking judge me. I stopped, okay? He didn’t notice, and even if he had, what was he gonna do?” Michael hates Nakoa; always has. A disappointment, and that isn’t even considering Rem. That’s not considering the fact that Michael knows, and always has, that Nakoa beds men as often as he does women. It’s been like this since Nakoa was born, his father distant for work, and Nakoa eager for his approval and stumbling on his work at thirteen.

“He couldn’t do anything about it then,” Nakoa says. “But now what’s stopping him? His kid went missing. No one’s gonna care if I end up in a ditch.”

“Don’t fucking joke about that.”

Nakoa shuts his mouth, though. Taps his fingers on the metal on the floor. He says, “I should have told you.” He wants to apologize; can’t.

Wishes that he could just… touch Rem. No expectation. Find comfort in his touch.

He holds his hands to himself, and neither of them speak.

Eventually, the van slows to a stop, and doesn’t start again. Rem gets to his feet, says, “I got this.” Nakoa hears the knife unlatching in his hand. “Stay back.”

“Don’t being a knife to a gun fight, you—” Nakoa sighs. “Just—get behind me.”

“I’m not going to let you—”

“He’s my father,” Nakoa says, his voice cracking. “Let me deal with him.” He thinks about clocking Rem on the head again, but if he got knocked out that bad, he might already have a concussion.

Nakoa doesn’t say, “I want you safe.” He doesn’t say that it means more to him that Rem is okay, that Rem can go home. Maybe Rem thinks he’s worthless, but he’s Nakoa’s entire world.

The door slides up, and Nakoa blinks against the blinding light. Rem stands behind him, body heat warming Nakoa’s back. Michael’s behind his men, chatting on the phone, but Nakoa doesn’t move, not until Michael says, his voice almost bored, like he’s not still devising a plan. “Come join me for dinner.”

Nakoa blinks. “Pretty fucking dramatic entrance for dinner.”

Michael rolls his eyes. “You could show a little respect.”

Already disappointing his father, and they’ve been reunited for a matter of minutes. Nakoa holds his gaze and says, “You wanna kill me, go ahead.”

Behind him, he hears Rem make a small, distressed noise. “Nakoa—”

But Nakoa’s tired of living in this hole, in his father’s shadow, too afraid to move beyond Michael and his wants. Too afraid Michael might follow through on his threats.

“Just come. We’ll discuss what I plan to do with you at dinner.” Michael sighs, rubbing his forehead. “I keep forgetting about the carry on.” Nakoa catches his attention shifting to Rem, wishes it wouldn’t. “Hm. Looks like he’s the reason they’re free. Someone remind me we need handcuffs.”

When Nakoa doesn’t go forward, Michael sighs, says, “Someone grab him, please. Leave the other.” He sighs. “And tie him up this time?”

One of the men hauls Nakoa from the truck, by the hair, the shoulder. Nakoa swears, grips at the guy’s wrist and tries to walk with him, can’t. Holds tight and tries to lessen the pressure on his hair, anyway.

He watches as Rem crawls from the truck, eyes wide with fear, brandishing his knife. In comparison to giant men with handguns, he looks like a small, terrified child. Nakoa knows better than to call out his name, so he doesn’t.

His chest aches, and a half-strangled, “Rem—” escapes from his throat, just as the man dragging him pulls him into a building. Before the door shuts, Nakoa catches sight of Rem lashing out, the sound of a gunshot, then… Nothing.

Nakoa finds himself dropped at Michael’s feet, scalp burning, Michael staring down at him with something akin to disinterest. “I wish things could have gone differently for you, Nakoa.”

This is nothing like the Michael Nakoa remembers. This man is… different. Distressingly calm, quiet.

Nakoa prefers him screaming. Calm breeds terror in Nakoa’s chest, and he doesn’t care for the way it burrows in and refuses to leave.

“Up.” It’s not a request. “Dinner.”

Tossing a scowl back at the man who’d dragged him, Nakoa rubs his wrists, follows Michael through the warehouse.. He needs to stay around until he can get back to Rem, anyway. After that… who cares? Michael can do whatever he wants with Nakoa, as long as Rem gets out of this safely.

Michael leads him into another room to a table sitting alone, like one in the movies, covered with a tablecloth, a single lightbulb illuminating the table and nothing more.

With a swallow, Nakoa takes his seat, still rubbing his wrists. Michael sits in the other chair, and, neat as can fucking be, he undoes his napkin and lays it across his lap.

“Nakoa,” Michael says, and now he sounds more like himself, like the Michael Nakoa remembers. “You are a pain in my ass, you know that?”

“So the pleasant, calm druglord, that’s just for your employees. But your son, all bets are off.”

Michael’s gaze is sharp, piercing, and Nakoa wishes he’d kept his mouth shut. “Ungrateful. You know,” he says, already lifting the lid from his dinner, “you really don’t understand the sacrifices I’ve made for you. The resources I’ve wasted finding you.”

As if Nakoa asked for it. As if he gives a shit about whether Michael goes broke. As if he cares, for half a second, what Michael loses. He sits back, crosses his arms. Waits.

“I can see you’re going to be difficult, so let me lay this out for you.” He pops a bite of dinner—steak, because of course it is—into his mouth, and chews. Slow. Nakoa knows the tactic well, terrify them with their own imagination. “You’ll come home with me.”

“Over my—”

“—and we can leave your friend here to fend for himself.”

“Next.”

Eyebrow raised, Michael cuts back into his steak. “I could just as easily kill your friend, you know. He hardly seems like a man someone will miss.” At Nakoa’s expression, Michael laughs. “Don’t tell me you think—” He shakes his head. “You’re a fool, Nakoa.”

Better a fool than a prick, Nakoa thinks, but he doesn’t say so. Michael married a gentle woman, one he can scare into submission, and he thinks Nakoa’s life choices are worth judging. “Next option,” he says, through gritted teeth, staring hard at the table, at the knife marks in the wood. Imagines what it might be like to see those on his skin, instead. If he’d even life through it.

“I could kill the both of you. You’ve already been missing for how long? None of the authorities would think twice about a couple of stupid, runaway queer boys ending up dead. Two of them…” He clicks his tongue. “Well. Is that even a tragedy worth the news cycle?”

And Michael wonders why he ran away. Nakoa lifts his gaze, reluctant, up towards Michael’s face, hates the giddy expression on his father’s face. He’s a bastard, and Nakoa knows he’s always enjoyed his work a little too much, but he’d hoped maybe, underneath it all, there was something that made him human. Now he’s not so sure.

“Easiest way to tie up loose ends, don’t you agree?”

Nakoa wants to tell him to fuck off, but Michael won't hesitate to cut him with the knife on his plate. Never has before. Never hesitates, once he makes his mind up. “Why the holdup?” Nakoa asks, but his voice shakes. “Sounds like you got it all figured out. Why not just kill me now?”

He’s losing his patience, Michael. The joy drains from his expression and he returns to his dinner, almost bored. “Unfortunately, I still think there might be some use in you. I could use you to make an example. I think using you as a living example carries more weight, don’t you?”

“What the fuck’s that supposed to mean?”

Pointing a fork to Nakoa’s plate, Michael says, “Eat. It’s the last time you’ll get the opportunity in a while.”

“What about Rem?” Nakoa does his best to hold his voice steady, to keep Michael from making any more shitty comments, but it still comes out wrong.

“I think I’ll be doing the world a favor, taking him out.” He reaches for his drink, then sighs. “Nakoa, please. If you don’t eat, I’ll be forced to take other measures.” Like what, Nakoa wonders, but doesn’t ask. Sighing, Michael sets his fork down and says, “Nakoa. It’s in your best interest to work with me.”

“Too fucking bad.”

“I can make your life a living hell, you know.”

“You already did. What can you do to make it worse?”

Michael raises an eyebrow, says, “You think you’re in love with the man outside. Not sure where you got that, but fine, I’ll play along. You’re right in considering yourself worthless, so I understand I can’t use you against yourself.” With a cock of his head, Michael leans back in his seat. “I might be able to use him yet. Suppose I better put in the call to keep him in one piece after all.” He pulls a walkie talkie out of his shirt pocket and switches it on. “Hold my previous order,” Michael says, glaring at Michael. “Plans have changed. We’re going to have a little fun.”

[chockfullofsecrets]

Class 1-A vs. Tickle Might: Part 1

<< Prologue (in case you’re wondering what’s going on) :: Part 2 >>

(A/N: Thank you so much to everyone who offered their kind feedback, especially @gigglingknight ! 2.7k words and 4 kids - Mineta’s not getting back up again - down, 16 to go! Hope you enjoy, and please let me know what you think - favorite scene, constructive criticism - your feedback will keep me awake at night to write part 2!)

The forty combined eyes of class 1-A were locked on All Might as he leapt gracefully from the wall of the training grounds, passing overhead and descending in a lazy arc into the mock city before them.

“He moves like a missile,” Momo said thoughtfully. “You would think such a big person would be less aerodynamic.”

Other students were less calm. “He’s gonna kill us all!” Mineta yelled. “I won’t get to enjoy my summer break at all!”

Hagakure clung to Ojiro’s arm. “Guys, I bet Aizawa-sensei sent him to beat us up before training camp. He probably thinks we won’t cause as much trouble if we’re all in full-body casts!”

Ojiro laughed, but he too was looking at the cluster of buildings in obvious dismay. “All Might’s the number one hero, he wouldn’t just indiscriminately fight us. I think.”

Even Aoyama’s sparkle was a little dimmed, his eyes wide in alarm behind his visor. “Mon dieu, didn’t you see what he did to Bakugou and Midoriya? His smile was as twinkling as ever, but… it was scary!”

“And he’s at full strength this time,” Satou added, his big lips pursed.

Those of them who were afraid edged closer to one other, clutching at armor and fabric and hands as if hoping they would fuse together into a single pro capable of taking on the Number One Hero. A select few, though, prepared to rally.

“It’ll be all right, guys!” Deku was smiling. Of course he was. “There’s a lot of us, and we have more experience using team attacks now! I’m sure we can impress All Might and Aizawa-sensei!”

Iida frowned. “Won’t it be easier for him to find us if we all stay in a group?”

“Maybe, but I feel safer with you guys!” Sero said.

“Yeah!”

“Let’s come up with a plan!”

A familiar snarl filled the air. “You extras can plan all you want!” Bakugou announced. “I’m going to face him head on! The only thing that would make me surrender is having to listen to you idiots for another minute!” He spun on his heel and stalked off, quickly disappearing behind the piles of concrete.

Kirishima grinned. “Guess I know what I’m doing, then.”

Mineta howled. “Just let him die! He’s really annoying! And if you get caught in the crossfire between him and All Might there’s no way you’ll survive.”

He shrugged. “Maybe, but I can’t just let him go in alone! And besides, what could be a manlier last sight on Earth than those two going at it?”

“I’ll come too,” Mina said, bouncing up and down on her toes. “I want to watch! And maybe I can get some surprise attacks in with my acid!”

The two of them headed off together after Bakugou, cheerily waving a goodbye to the rest of the group. Kaminari waved back at them like it was the last he would ever see of his two friends. Jirou scoffed and turned to look at the two planners left in their group. “Let’s call them the distraction, then… Momo, Midoriya, do you guys have any ideas?”

Bakugou’s arms throbbed inside his gauntlets.

The wounds from his finals match had been healed by Recovery Girl  - the old hag had been surprised that he’d been hurt so bad, even though Deku was in the next bed over with a shitty bruised spine, as if he wasn’t just as dedicated to winning even if it means shattering every bone in his damn arm – but the memory of just how much it hurt was still in there.

He almost wished Kirishima was here to guard his back. Shitty Hair could take a punch, at least. Maybe even one of All Might’s. But he didn’t need him to win. All he needed was the chance to get in one good blow of his own this time –

A sound behind him. He whirled around, one sweat-filled hand slinging behind him with even more force. As soon as he could see his target, he would –

Something closed around his wrist. A sudden jerking sensation as his arm was pulled upwards, and the explosion seared harmlessly into the air.

All Might was holding him suspended by one hand. Like a freaking ragdoll. “Ah, young hero! I might have expected you to come face me head-on.”

Instead of replying, he tried to blast the man with his other hand. It joined the other above his head just as quickly, held in that same massive grip. “What are you doing? DON’T RESTRAIN ME, YOU SHITTY – let me fight, old man!”

All Might propped his free hand on his hip. “A brave face, huh? You must really want a rematch. I think your sleeveless uniform’s really going to put you at a disadvantage in this round…”

He cocked his hand, fingers spread stiffly for a grab or chop, and Bakugou wasn’t afraid, he wasn’t, but that didn’t keep his body from flinching, a fruitless attempt to protect himself from the painful blow.

His captor paused. “Young Bakugou, are you – are you frightened of me?”

“No.”

He lowered his arm enough for Bakugou to get his feet on the ground – still up on his toes, but at least he wasn’t hanging there like a sack of meat. “My boy, I must say that I’m very sorry about the end of our last battle. I wouldn’t have stopped you so forcefully if I didn’t think you were about to seriously injure yourself.”

“I’m not fucking afraid, okay? Just hit me already so I can hit back.”

All Might looked unconvinced. “Ah, that’s… good, young hero! Such an indomitable spirit!” His smile grew impossibly wider. “Besides, you won’t come to any harm today!”

“Oh yeah? Then what the fuck are we here to do, talk each other into submission? And what do you mean, I’m at a disadvantage because my uniform doesn’t have sleeves?”

“Ah, yes.” All Might cocked his hand again. His fingers were wiggling this time, and somehow this spiked Bakugou’s apprehension in an entirely different way. “Allow me to demonstrate.”

He’d never put much thought into a costume redesign, but as All Might’s evil hands came in contact with his bare armpits he decided that he needed more armor. Immediately. “W-whahaHAT! THE HEHEHELL?!” His palms were sparking uselessly into the sky, face bent into a helpless grin, and shit he was glad that none of the others in his class were here right now.

It was a relief, almost, not to be thrust into another bloody fight with his hero, but that didn’t stop him from kicking and screaming bloody murder, still on his tiptoes as he strained for some leverage to protect himself. All Might was chuckling. “I think this is the first time I’ve seen you smile, young Bakugou! A very good imitation of my trademark, but perhaps we can do better!”

“NOHO – nowecan’t – AHAHA!” His entire torso was helpless under the attack, and his face hurt from smiling so hard. It wasn’t long before he couldn’t take it anymore. “OKAY nonONO not thaHAT just fucking STOP I GIVE I GIVE!”

All Might let him down gently, giving one last triumphant laugh as he patted Bakugou on the back. “An admirable effort, my boy.”

“I didn’t even do anything,” he mumbled into the ground. Was he still grinning? He was, like an idiot. He was an idiot. This was terrible.

Footsteps skidded into the street. “Bakubro, we heard you screaming – laughing? – oh shit, he’s here-”

Bakugou forced his head up. Kirishima and Mina. They’d probably followed him in.

He snorted. “You’re next, morons. Better run if you’re ticklish.”

They’d worked three-quarters of the way through a plan involving Sero’s tape (just. So much tape), Tsuyu’s mucus secretion, and a titanium bondage set from Momo when an explosion roared through the air.

“Kacchan,” Deku gasped. His theory was confirmed when the explosion died down only to be replaced with cursing at only a slightly reduced volume. And then there was the screaming.

“Such darkness,” Tokoyami intoned. “It will swallow us all.”

The screams continued, Bakugou sounding truly desperate. “OKAY nonONO not thaHAT just fucking STOP I GIVE I GIVE!”

Mineta fainted.

The racket tapered off at last, All Might’s laugh echoing tinnily in their ears as they all shivered. “Do you think he’s still alive?” Uraraka whispered. “Man, this is scary.”

Deku’s mind raced. The other students were thinking frantically too, but he had two pieces of information that no one else knew.

The first: In all the videos he’d seen of All Might, he’d never heard of him making a villain beg for mercy. All Might preferred to harm the villains he captured as little as possible, making it easier to the police to detain them without having to provide medical treatment and having the added effect of minimizing property damage.

The second: He’d grown up with Kacchan, who had never been in the habit of screaming in anything other than rage. The only thing that had ever made him howl like that had happened when they were little, and it was – it was –

Oh.

“Midoriya’s about to faint,” Todoroki said.

“Deku?” Uraraka shook him. “What’s going on?”

He swallowed. “We need to split up and hide. Now.”

The class looked at each other in alarm. If even he couldn’t maintain his determination…

They were all going to die.

“We’re not going to die!” Mina gushed. “This is so fun! This is fantastic!”

She and Kirishima were sprinting away from All Might as fast as they could, taking corners at random in hopes that they would lose him. “Yeah, if we can make it back to the others, they’ll definitely be less scared!”

“Are you certain of that, young hero?”

They both skidded to a stop, but Kirishima still crashed into All Might’s massive chest and rebounded onto the ground. Mina shot past them both with a shriek. “All Might!”

The man crouched over him. “I was surprised not to find you with your friends, young Kirishima.”

“We were trying to find Bakugou,” he admitted, rubbing the back of his head. “Mina and I are really bad with directions though, so we got lost until we heard him screaming.”

“It seems you arrived at the perfect time to become my next victim,” the hero intoned, and wow that smile was the most ominous thing he’d ever seen now.

“I – haha –“ Kirishima spluttered, before remembering that he had a quirk. “Ha!” he exclaimed, activating his quirk and feeling immensely relieved as his skin hardened to a rock-like texture. “There’s no way you can tickle me now!”

“It will be more difficult,” All Might mused. Suddenly, he yanked one of Kirishima’s boots off. “I wonder, do your palms and soles harden as well?”

Kirishima, who’d had his quirk for all of twelve years, suddenly couldn’t remember. He glanced frantically at one of his hands and mentally cheered. “Ah, they do.”

All Might frowned, as much as he could frown. “If all your skin hardens, it’s pretty surprising that you can move at all…” Taking Kirishima’s foot gently in his hand, he rotated it right and left. “If this works, then…”

Kirishima felt something brush against his ankle, and without thinking, snickered at the ticklish sensation.

All Might’s grin came back in full force. Hesitantly, Kirishima offered him a weak smile. “Uh… maybe I just have a really cool quirk… and tickling definitely won’t work on me?”

Turned out, his ankles were traitors. A few scratches from All Might and he was already giggling frantically, his other foot drumming against the ground as he tried to roll over and crawl away. Even worse, as he lost focus his quirk began to waver, and despite his effort of squeezing his eyes shut and trying to will the laughter away he could feel his protective shell softening around him.

“Not so tough now, young hero,” All Might teased, and Kirishima groaned internally at the joke as his torture became a thousand times worse. The soles of his feet, the soft skin behind his knees – even squeezing his calf produced a new wave of laughter from him.

He couldn’t take it. No wonder Bakugou had been collapsed on the ground. “Mihihina…. MINA, HELP!”

A pair of pink arms wound themselves around All Might’s neck – Mina, jumping on his back. “Hi! All Might-sensei, can I go next?”

The tickling eased up a little as All Might turned his head to smile at her. “You know, my girl, this is technically a test.”

She pouted. “I know, but… tickling! I already failed my practical anyway, so I’m sure I’ll have to take the remedial classes. I might as well relax and have some fun while I can instead of running! Right, Kirishima?”

Panting, he considered this situation. This was definitely more fun than a fight, and it was really nice after the nightmare of preparing for finals. “Heh… yeah, I guess you’re right.”

“I can hardly refuse such a polite request,” All Might proclaimed grandly, “but first, I need to hear a surrender from young Kirishima here!” He reached a hand up to scratch at Kirishima’s ribcage, the boy squeaking as he tried to bat it away.

“I could help,” Mina offered slyly.

“No, yOU CAHAN’T!” Two pairs of hands hovered over him, Mina reaching over All Might’s shoulder with her evilest grin. “Wait, wait, I give!”

All Might roared with laughter, offering Kirishima a hearty embrace as he wobbled to his feet. “A smart decision! She’s very determined!”

He glared half-heartedly at Mina, shaking his head with a rueful grin. “I’m going to get you for this.” He turned to All Might. “Do we get to watch the others?”

“You do have to leave the training ground. However, your Aizawa-sensei’s in the evaluation room. If he permits you to enter, then you can watch with him!”

“Cool! I’ll see you there, Ashido.” He looked around. “Which way is the exit again?”

As he left, Mina prepared to jump off All Might and take off – she felt like running at least a little bit, after seeing how wrecked Kirishima looked. But before she could so much as loosen her grip, All Might spoke in a decidedly villainous voice. “Well, young Ashido, this means it’s your turn now.”

He grabbed her uniform and yanked, and the next thing she knew she had tumbled over his shoulder and straight into his arms with a surprised shout. He dropped to the ground, cross legged, and released her unceremoniously into his lap. “Wow, you move… really fast, sensei!”

All Might chuckled. Evilly. “You said you wanted to relax, young hero? Perhaps you’d like a massage?” His fingers dug into the muscle at the back of her shoulders, and she found herself squealing with laughter as they hunched up instinctively. “Hm… you don’t look very relaxed. Maybe a different technique?” Said technique was a light massaging of her ribcage that had her curled into a shaking ball, giggling her head off. “This seems a bit harsh… are you really having fun, young Ashido?”

“Yehehes!” she giggled, burying her head in his shoulder. “Lohots of fun!”

His breath stirred her hair as he huffed with laughter. “All right, then.” He continued happily, paying special attention to her neck when he discovered that tickling her there produced actual cackles. She lasted for nearly three minutes before slapping at his hands and gasping breathlessly for mercy.

All Might waited until she caught her breath to move, standing them up together. She jumped onto him once more, offering him a hug from the front this time. He returned it slowly, a little surprised but pleased nonetheless. “You’ve had your fun, young Ashido! I hope you’ll apply as much dedication to attaining mastery of your studies!”

“I will”, she promised, climbing to his shoulder and somersaulting off to the ground. “Thanks a lot, All Might-sensei! It’s really nice of you and Aizawa-sensei to do this for us!”

He had to point her in the direction of the exit as well. She left with a cheerful smile, and he smiled in return as he cracked his knuckles.

Time to find his next target.

[many-gay-magpies]

sorry i’m so late 😭 i’ve been meaning to get to this for a while. irl stuff has gotten hectic to say the least unfortunately, but i am here now!

now i’m thinking abt the vamps doing ~mild crime~ to get around after they escape the orphanage and i Love it. jakah would be a Stellar pickpocket and i think noa too, he can move in darkness, steal smth, and not be seen at all. jaan can just generally beat up people who get too suspicious, jino lights campfires for them when they can’t get shelter and have to sleep outside (yes ik vampires can’t feel cold and see well in the dark but idc), shion with his mind-control powers (which are . barely mentioned in the webtoon or webnovel??? cuttoons my beloved) persuading people to let them stay in their homes for a night, solon staging wolf attacks so the livestock disappearances aren’t suspicious. maybe noa got so good at sleeping upside down and climbing stuff bc they’d regularly break into barns and things to get shelter for a bit and he would hide from the owners in the rafters. just . the group as a bunch of little ruffians committing their little crimes

“when you get your memories back, we’ll celebrate all your birthdays” OW. MY HEART. PAIN. sooha being the one to metaphorically slap the brothers awake (or physically, she’d slap them anyway!) from their “plan” of just getting through immortal life is so great to me. just imagining her like “wait so y’all have never tried laser tag?” and they’re like “no wtf. what is that.” and she’d be like “oh right y’all were literally born a million years ago.” “actually it’s just a few hundr-“ “ANYWAYS WERE GOING TO LASER TAG THIS WEEKEND BC CLEARLY YOURE NOT USING YOUR IMMORTALITY WISELY” and dragging them to fun, stupid little things because what good is an immortal life if you don’t fill it with happy memories unique to every time period you’ve lived?

- vrvr anon

ahh its np!! life happens, but like you said, youre here now! [and as a bonus i waited (see: forgot) to answer this for three days to even the field a bit LMAO]

BUT ANYWAYS yes. crime. who doesnt love a bit of crime here and there? for legal reasons this is speaking strictly in a fictional sense YES pickpockets jakah and noa! people at decelis THINK their brothers call them the "terror twins" (despite them not being twins) because of how deadly they are on the nightball field, but REALLY its because of how they used to tagteam pickpocketing from the upper class when they were fresh out of the orphanage. JAAN BEATING UP PEOPLE THAT GET TOO SUSPICIOUS YES GO VIOLENCE. maybe a particularily large asshole is threatening to out them as vampires and jaan is just like *cracks knuckles* "well ig its about time to pull out the big guns" meanwhile shion next to him is like "...you know i can just erase that guy's memories right-" "nOPE IM DEAF NOW CANT HEAR YOU. GONNA BEAT THIS GUY UP NOW" (IF the memory-wiping is something shion can even DO that early on—it would be interesting if it isnt, and instead its a more specialized skill he develops over time, because then their only resort at the start really WOULD be jaan beating people into submission to keep them from telling)

i can totally see shion using his mind-control to coerce people into giving them shelter-- and then when the brothers leave he tells them "just remember, we were never here, alright?" so that the host forgets and cant tell the orphanage anything if they come calling. theyd absolutely sneak into barns for shelter/rest, and now im thinking about them getting really familiar and friendly with farm animals because of it, and really having a soft spot for them even far into the future—like the school goes on a farm field trip or something and heli is, like, REALLY good with the chickens and the farmers are impressed and asking him stuff like "oh have you been on a farm before?" and he has to physically stop himself from blurting out "yeah when my brothers and i used to sneak into peoples' barns to sleep as kids (their early vampire days probably seem like a childhood to them, in a way) i got really good at calming down the animals" (which. also now that i think about it adds a small level of angst to them killing and eating the livestock on some of those farms. but we dont need to talk about that <3). i also absolutely agree with noa get at good at climbing because of climbing in the rafters of barns, and solon staging wolf attacks to make the livestock disappearances less suspicious—they probably wouldnt have to do it that often, either, because an entire cow (if they knew how to properly drain it) would probably sustain them all for a while. little ruffians committing their little crimes!

NO BCS NOW I HAVE EVEN MORE FEELINGS ABOUT THE BOYS' IMMORTALITY AND ABOUT SOOHA TEACHING THEM TO (METAPHORICALLY) LIVE AGAIN. because now im just thinking, the vampires' lives (that they can remember) basically consist of just the orphanage, the escape, and then running—and nothing else for a long, long time. they had to run for so long with the threat of the orphanage hanging over their heads that it just became the norm to them. the threat's still there today—it will never completely be gone, and so, the running will never stop. it's all they know. then sooha comes along, and her existence—her new, bright presence in their once-closed circle—kicks them into realizing that theyve been existing rather than actually living their (non-) lives for the past several centuries. after sooha HERSELF realizes this, she gets a bit aggressively sad/indignant for them and everything theyve missed—have they ever even BEEN to a modern movie theater?! to a water park? to an arcade?? have they been on a road trip, an actual road trip, meant for sight-seeing and experiencing things rather than endlessly running from whatever's behind you? when they go into town on the weekends, is it to have fun, or is it just performative; just to seem like all the other kids at decelis? did they even do that before she showed up? i just have a lot of feelings okay (and so does sooha)

however now this brings a happier scenario to mind—wherein sooha is giving the boys this big impassioned speech, making them realize how much theyve missed while thinking that running was all their lives would ever amount to, and then right at the end of it she yells, full of anger and pain for them, maybe a little teary-eyed; "just because you died doesn't mean you can't live!!"

silence. they all sit there blinking as the realization of what sooha just said sinks in— sooha herself equally dumbfounded. then, the entire atmosphere diffuses as they just burst out laughing; the full-bodied, hysterical sort of laughter that's been pent up for a while, making them fall out of their chairs or off their beds and struggle to breathe (or, well, in sooha's case anyway). they exhaust themselves laughing and then, when they FINALLY catch their breath (both metaphorical and literal), theyre in cozy enough states of mind to have a serious, but significantly more comfortable conversation about everything, and about the plans theyre going to make for all the activities they've missed that sooha is going to introduce them to. i like the idea of them maybe making a pact to do one new thing every weekend, whether it's going to the movies, going to a karaoke bar, or just having a sleepover as a way to teach the boys how to enjoy life again, and also give them some good-old friend group bonding time :)

[shanadb5kblog]

Killing Stalking: Getting Anal With The Analysis

Well since the previous got surprisingly popular cause Im a nobody on tumblr still, I decided to write another post of my insane over the top analysis.

So today I was re-reading chapter 2~5 and well, lets get into it.

When he kills the CEO’s daughter, I noticed he chopped off her hair. He doesnt do this with any of the other victims as far as we know. Hair is a sign of pride, he did that to strip every bit of of her self worth and pride and Im quite sure she was alive when he cut it. Sangwoo likes to humiliate his victims but he took it a step further with this one because as I mentioned previously, he doesnt like to be looked down upon or underestimated. He says in this panel how she thought she was better than him and it speaks to how his child hood was. His family was obviously not very well off and I got the feeling this murder had something to do with him harbouring some resentment for those of a higher social class than him. There is no evidence that suggest she actually did look down on him so I wondered if he was just projecting his insecurities onto her.

But less to do with her attitude, Sangwoo was more pissed by her obviously cheating either with him or on him since she was seeing another man as well. Heres his weird sense of morality. As unhinged as he is, he is also proud, arrogant and selfish. Someone of her status was probably cheating with him and Sangwoo does not like to share. He was punishing her out if his own twisted sense of morality. Like “You look down on others and cheat..youre scum”. Every murder that we have seen Sangwoo commit, the victim always had some flaw or done something wrong. Like with the old man who tried to basically rape him and Jieun who..well..was a huge bitch (especially to bummie)..and it shows why he hasnt killed Bum. Bum isnt a bad person. Hes creepy and weird af but..hes not vindictive.

Further, I drew an interesting parallel between Sangwoo and his father regarding the whole big table/ small table thing.

Its literally the same scene..just with Sangwoo taking the place of his father. And heres why this next panel was so interesting to me:

He follows this line with:

I didnt understand what he wanted to “confirm”. Then I realized by having Bum take the place of his mother…he may want to confirm if he is indeed like his father or not. I know this is a stretch but I couldnt stop seeing this connection. This is just my interpretation. Feel free to disagree~

This brings me to this section. Sangwoos weird inferiority complex. Now..Sangwoo is infact a bully. And bullies are generally cowards. Sangwoo is handsome and charming..as seems to have it all but he suffers from an inferiority complex as most people like him tend to do.

When he says “Im starting to feel superior”, that showed me how he doubts himself. The way Sangwoo is, he technically should already consider himself superior..but he doesnt. And thats because of his insecurities and why he enjoys having submissive!Bum around. It pumps up his ego.

The Rat Poison Incident: Is Sangwoo Immortal?

Finally alot of people have been wondering about this like we know hes a fucking psycho but even he should be susceptible to poison! However, I dont think it actually was rat poison. It was too convenient that Bum finds poison just when hes planning his escape. I think this mofo was testing Bum. He was cleaning out that area before he asked Bum to clean it. He knew it was there. He didnt have any reason to suspect Bum besides Bum smiling and the whole “you eat first” thing, if that actually was poison, Bum wouldnt have made it cause Im sure Sangwoo made sure he ate more than a bite. I think Sangwoo replaced that with something else that made Bum sick. He wanted to see how far Bums loyalty went. Its just the kinda fucker he is.

Eye candy:

Sangwoo doing pushups is the sexiest thing in the whole manhwa…like..can he do it on top of me? Thnx.

Well hope you enjoyed my little rant. Let me what you guys think :D♡

[cow3survivor]

Ep. 10: “Your Package Has Been Shipped.” - Shane

JENNET

finished immunity and i think i did pretty good. its not in my hands anymore but im also not in jeopardy of being voted out so we shall see

(a little later)

mikey found the idol and told me sam sammy and jones so im pretty happy that he trusted us with that im ready to make a move and vote out either shane or daisy :))

JONES

https://youtu.be/4Y11juHth0c

JESSICA

Right now I don't know what will happen this round at all. It will be interesting to see how things play out! I think I'm in a good spot with the 6 person alliance. I'm also hoping that Sammy, Mikey, and Jake (and myself) can get some sort of group going since I'd spoken with Sammy about that and he seemed game. I know I submitted a confessional about how Sam has to have the idol and such but that is not true! It is based on false info I actually have no idea who has that Furcifer idol. Jennet told Lovelis they thought they’d be the one to go this round. I don't love the idea of voting for them because we get along pretty well but I also haven't connected with them strategically so it's not the worst move for me. I think we're likely to see a lot of drama late in the day tomorrow so I'm just hoping that my relationships will keep me out of the crossfire.

(a little later)

....and now I have found where the third idol is. In ter es ting

JENNET

super late last night jake texted me how the ethan vote didnt sit right with him (...after he listened to people telling him what to do and voted him out anyways....) and he wanted to squash the tension. im like wym? jake says that lindsay is being way too shady and that she should go next. and hes scared that shes gotten too close to shane and daisy. mind u he doesnt know that i KNOW hes in an alliance with daisy, lindsay, shane, jessica, and jones. :3 i feel like things keep falling into my lap

MIKEY

so not much has been going on tbh sis. I FOUND THE IDOL THOUGH YUPPPP and stupidly told an alliance of 5 ppl right away X3 Im so quirky. Anyways chile still feel really stupid ab doing that but its okay ig. adam is climbing the ranks and may soon be my favorite intern! Henry ma, you gotta step it up yo keep your first place rank!

LINDSAY

Aight you got three because i think i forgot to submit these but if they're double submissions i am so sorry 12/22- https://drive.google.com/file/d/1BXe97VoqJnUCER8aRn7-q0aiZuOFtzVm/view?usp=sharing

JESSICA

So much has happened that it isn't even possible for me to recap! But basically I'm glad I have Shane as a f2, he told me everything that's going down and I told him (almost!) everything that I know. I'm now in an alliance with Jake, Sammy, Mikey. Jake is going to want to vote for Lindsay this round. That would be cute... if I wasn't in a final 3 with her and Shane! I would love to get the votes to take out Daisy this round + use Shane's idol nullifier to do it. She is close with Sammy, close with Lindsay, and very close with Jones. That's just not a connection I really need being in the way of my game. Plus it's great she gives advantages and information to Shane.... but it would be nicer if we got that information first hand :) However, the only way I can see this working is if that group of 6 splits their votes and thinks Sam/Daisy/Jones are voting for Jennet. That would mean they think the vote is: - Jake/Mikey/me/Sammy (+Jennet?): Lindsay - Daisy/Jones/Sam: Jennet - Shane/Lindsay (+Jennet?): Sam And while a 4-3-3 would be cute, this is what it would actually be: - Jake/Sammy (+Jennet?): Lindsay - Daisy/Jones: Jennet - Jennet? : Sam or Lindsay - me/Shane/Lindsay/Mikey/Sam: Daisy (+ play idol nullifier on her) But I need to know how Jake plans to go for Lindsay before I can really make this work. I'm hoping some good ol' fashioned "no one knows where the Calumma idol is" paranoia will make a split vote possible. Apparently Lindsay also has an idol she can play before the votes are cast, so if need be she could just play that tonight and lie and say it expired this round. The problem with all of this is Shane for some reason really wants to use the safety without power. No clue why as that advantage sucks, it really only makes sense to play if you think you're going home. If he uses it, it will make pulling off a blindside that much harder because we need every vote we can get. I'm glad the game is opening up and we're all having more fun! Even if I end up going home, I am having a good time.

SAMMY

ahhh!! I won immunity holla!!! I did not want to stress going into this tribal and I knew I would get paranoid bc powers are being played. I have so much information I feel like in terms of game even tho I really am not in that many alliances<3 I feel so good just like navigating the game and I feel bad for exposing some of Daisys powers but idk like I said...Daisy is playing the middle and socializing with everyone! I haven't told her the plan but also she hasn't really tried figuring out the plan? She's just been telling me like "I heard Jennet" which is fine. I want to vote out Lindsay tho as she is my weakest connection. I can see Lindsay trying to reach out to me but I think she feels her alliance cracking and realized she has to start reaching out more...blinks...but yeah Jake and Jess better jump ship (which they are) but yeah not too many updates I feel safe so I'm just staying put

JAKE

https://youtu.be/dTaDFn7U8DA hehe I’m in danger 😳

DAISY

https://youtu.be/H0tmn1UIqNs

(a little later)

RARE  WRITTEN CONF! THERE IS NOW A RUMOR THAT THE VOTE MIGHT FLIP ON TO LINDSAY?? UMM NO TY! SHE SUPPOSEDLY HAS A POWER AND I WANT TO TIP HER OFF THAT SHE SHOULD USE IT BUT WITHOUT ME GETTING HEAT FOR IT AFTER THE FACT PLS me not knowing what to do with my idol <3

(after picking up a package)

So. Lindsay and I are both playing idols tonight boom. That either means Jennet or Jake should be leavng but I'm voting jake last minute. Shits stirring.

[wanna1things]

Radio DJ!Kim Jaehwan

the idea came to me because for like a good 3 years of my life i wanted to be a radio dj and idk jaehwan fits this au well...

Genre;; fluff +radio dj au is that a thing idk

Warnings;; unless you hate jaehwan, his laugh, and music then none lol

Pairing;; Kim Jaehwan x reader

Requested;; no this is just another thing from my backlog lol

Summary;; Jaehwan is the radio dj for your university radio station, and he’s looking for someone to present with him… maybe something more?

Style;; bullet point

Word Count;; 1913

UH requests will be done by the end of the week!! just clearing the backlog of posts while i revise for my uni tests lol

jaehwan is pretty well known in your university for his job as a dj for the uni’s radio station

nobody knows what he’s studying, everyone assumes it’s music (they’re right), they just know he’s the guy with the weird laugh who hosts the midnight to 2am slot

aka when everyone is cramming

he plays pretty funky music at the start but by the end it’s chill tunes to help everyone wind down and actually get some sleep

you’re an avid listener

you stay up until 2am every day, not even to study just to listen to his show lol

you always make notes of the songs he plays because he seems to have almost the exact same music taste as you??

by the time it’s 2am your hand is aching from writing down all the songs he’s played lol

at 1am he always has a 5 minute gap where he covers a popular song on guitar and sings it too and sjhgfsjd it’s amazing you’re in love with his voice

it’s just…

you have no idea what he looks like

all of your friends know about your crush on the dj with the satanic laugh and they tease you 24/7

like lol how can you be in love with a guy you’ve never seen before

but theres some sort of;; connection that you feel with him lmao

anyway, as you walk into your class one day in the middle of the semester you notice a poster up on the pinboard

in handwritten bubble letters (you know the ones) it says

“kim jaehwan is recruiting!! send a playlist to my email jaehwanisthebestdjintheworld@gmail.com and i’ll rate you and decide on who will be my new co-host!! entries close at the end of the week!”

your heartbeat speeds up

now you have an opportunity to possibly meet the guy you’ve been crushing on since that one time you pulled an all nighter at the beginning of uni lol

you take note of his pretty stupid email address and take your seat at the back of the class

instead of listening you spend the whole time brainstorming your playlist sdhfhds

as soon as the lecturer dismisses you, you leg it out of the room and to your flat

but in your rush you accidentally run into someone

and by run i mean like you slam into this really cute guy

and you spill his drink lol

they seemed uh… pretty mad but honestly you were in such a rush to get back and sort out the playlist you just opened your bag and gave him a $5 bill to cover the costs lmao

as you walk away you swear you hear a familiar satanic laugh coming from the guy you just ran into but

you chalk it up to you just hearing things

you stay up until midnight sorting out the playlist and brainstorming

after trying to come up with themed playlists and stuff but losing motivation after a while

you decide to roughly follow the structure he uses in his show, funky and louder at the start and gradually getting softer

you put all of your favourite songs in there, and make sure to sprinkle a couple of ones that jaehwan plays regularly in there

and once you’re pleased with the result you send it to the email,, at exactly 11:59

before you know it jaehwans show is starting

“Hello fellow students!! It’s everyone’s favourite midnight dj Kim Jaehwan!! Thank you for all your submissions so far, i’ll be reviewing them tomorrow! For now let's get on with the show!’

you realise straight away the first song hes playing is the one you put first on your playlist

and you’re a bit creeped out but you just think its a coincidence i mean you two have the same music taste

but by the time the 5th song is playing eXACTLY the same as your playlist you realise

he’s literally just playing your playlist

you open up your email again and begin drafting a new email asking for an explanation like really why is he using your playlist??

within seconds you get a reply

“hello;; y/n;; yeah sorry about that you’re the only submission so far… i took a look at the first 3 songs and i decided i trust your choices enough to use your playlist for this show… hope you don’t mind??”

OF COURSE YOU DON’T MIND

you type a speedy reply because uh oh don’t want jaehwan thinking you’re mad

“hey jaehwan! i don’t mind at all!! does this mean i got the job lol??”

again in the space of 3 seconds you get a reply but this time it’s just two words

“no comment”

the next day you head into uni and you realise all of the posters jaehwan put up for recruiting have been taken down

honestly you’re a bit shook like does he not need a partner any more??

that is until halfway through your day you’re sitting in the library studying when you receive an email from the one and only worlds best dj kim jaehwan

“hey new partner! you’ve officially been recruited! meet me in the cafe in 20 minutes;; here’s my phone number _______!”

the first thing that comes to your mind is what do you save jaehwans number as dsjfgdfjh

you decide on ‘worlds no.1 dj’ and then pack up your work and make your way to the cafe

when you get there you see a guy sitting at a table on his own, looking at his phone suspiciously and sipping on his drink

when you look a bit closer you realise uh oh its the guy you bumped into yesterday don’t get noTICED

but after about 5 minutes of trying to hide from the guy you ran into, you still can’t spot jaehwan so you decide to ring his number

you’re mortified when you see the guy you ran into pick up his phone sjfhjs uh oh

you stay on the line and gradually make your way over to the table he’s at and sit down in the chair opposite him

he is honestly just as shocked as you

“okay y/n i have so many questions first of all why did you give me $5?? why were you in such a hurry?? what is this”

you can’t even process his questions because ok you just fell in love a litttttle bit more

i mean like this guy i mean jaehwan has the cutest cheeks and a really cuTE SMILE and really soft looking fluffy hair oh my god;;;

you’re almost about to grab your phone and call all of your friends like HA i fell in love with someone i’ve never seen and he turned out to be good looking as hell anyway LMAO

when he realises you’re not going to answer his questions he stands up and orders you an iced coffee lol

as he puts it in front of you, you thank him graciously and suddenly blurt out

‘thank you so much honestly i’ve been a fan of yours for a long time and we have the exact same music taste and i really admire you and you’re an amazing singer and musician an-’

‘woah okAY y/n i didn’t hire you just to hear compliments i mean i’m not complaining but you don’t need to thank me lol you have a gift with playlists that's whY i hired you’

he smiles at you really wide and you realise like you had nothing to be so nervous about he’s not got a grudge against you and hes also super nice?? at least he seems it

and so you’re welcomed to the radio family

at first everyone is so confused when your voice appears alongside jaehwan’s at 12am

but after a while everyone is very attached to your shows

you pick amazing songs together, you have gr8 banter and sometimes;; just sometimes you join in singing with jaehwan

after the show he always compliments you on how good you are at singing but tbh he’s so whipped he doesnt know

thats right

jaehwan was interested you from the moment you gave him instant compensation for running into him

and now, after spending all this time with you, he’s just like

so in love

like;; not only do you have mad talent but you also can deal with him and his annoying laugh like lets be honest most of his friends give up after an hour or two

even his best friend the business major minhyun can only handle him for so long lol

but you two are so in tune and theres some sort of connection between you two that words can’t explain;; one that you’ve been feeling for a LONG TIME

it doesn’t help that now there’s mad gossip going around

“that person that djs with jaehwan for the midnight slot?? yeah them i heard they’re dating jaehwan as well lol”

uH

minhyun, who sometimes comes and sits to watch live action midnight slot, has also noticed that you both have pretty obvious feelings for each other

he’s noticed how when you look at jaehwan it’s like you’re looking at the whole damn universe

and how jaehwan can’t help but smile to himself whenever you smile

and he starts up a plan

a plan to convince jaehwan to confess

one night after the slot they walk you back to the dorm together

minhyun feeling like a bit of a third wheel lol

but as soon as you’re safely inside minhyun whispers to jaehwan

‘heyyyy jaehwan…. I know about your crush on y/n’

jaehwan turns briGHT RED

‘haha what do u mean i have no idea what you’re talking about buddy sorry’

‘bro;;; are you blind she likes you back’

nobody has ever seen jaehwan whip out his phone quicker

in a moment of madness he dials your number quicker than lightning and calls you down to the courtyard

minhyun makes his way back to his dorms on his own because he already knows this is too cheesy to watch i mean he could record it for blackmail but jaehwan would probably kill him if he did lol

as soon as you get downstairs with your dressing gown wrapped around you jaehwan kneels down on the floor like romeo-style

‘jaehwan if u have something to say please hurry up my hot chocolate is getting cold-’

‘y/n~~ i have loved you~~ since you gave me five dollars~~ im glad i walked into you~~ or technically you walked into me but still~’

is he really singing his confession? yes. this is jaehwan we are talking about

you’re not sure if it’s because of embarrassment or happiness but you can feel your cheeks heating up

‘jaehwan if this is you asking me to date you, i accept, but please come inside it’s cold lol’

of course he comes in and you share your hot chocolate

from that day on you were the cutest and most EXTRA couple ever

you announce your relationship in the show by playing the cheesiest love songs for an hour

at the end of the year makeshift awards you win the cutest couple award (and jaehwan wins weirdest laugh award, as expected)

you also win best duet award for your daily singing sessions at 1am

all in all you two are super cute and super extra

everyone is jealous but you’re still their fAVE COUPLE

listen i love jaehwan so much okay this made me so soft for jaehwan uGHH anyway i hope you enjoyed and that this wasn’t a disaster lol i’m going to SCHLEEP

[survivormarmoreal]

Episode #12: "FUuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuoooouuoock me." - Maynor

Well. Looks like Bryce wasnt trust worthy at all. I can only have annabelle but we dont talk too much. I need to win immunity or my ass is gone next.

I definately need to win this immunity if I want to regroup. A even bigger fire in me wanting to play even more aggressive. Ive been passive. Now I dont really care who goes. Except for Annabelle ❤️. Im going to try and throw wrenches in their plans and try to get someone from their side out.

I’m on 230. Idk what my goal is going to be but i think im going to stop around 2pm so i can go back to 1 before 5pm deadline comes. I really need to win this immunity. 😰

Update. I am now at 500 for the number. Its barely noon. Idk if i should keep going or start to go back down to one. I just hope im the furtherest from everyone else. I would die if i dont win.

I feel so terrible. like that Nathan vote was the hardest thing I have had to do in this game so far. He betrayed my trust a lot. But I really got along so well with him. And Nathan deserves better. Ugh. Like Brian and I literally feel gross. And now I have to do damage control with Anna and make it seem like a last minute switch when actually it was me being a terrible person and plotting all round against one of the nicest players ever. I'm feeling rough and this season is getting really tough.

Well I am still here! I am honestly shocked that I am, but I will TAKE it gladly! Maybe I will stop being the target now cause nathan is gone (we shall see though, I feel like Bryce and brian are now HATED by Maynor and Anna) which will be nice. I now have the lovely (....) distinction of having the most votes cast against me in celestial history. and ALL Since the merge started lmao! I really am a magnet for votes huh. I feel good, might have to be rude to someone to get a target off my back though so uh maybe bitch boi matt will make a return at some point? We shall see

its so awk trying to talk to annabelle bc 1 she doesnt talk to me but more importantly idk what to say like. she feels betrayed but sharkys the one who threw nathans name out NNN she should be glad if it were up to me shed be in ponderosa right now ASFKJADSHFKJS. idk like i literally just forced a convo with her so i could confront her about leaking to sharky and she just ghosts. i want DRAMA. i want TEA. and yet nothing. maybe instead of doing the most i should be doing immunity but counting is literally so anxiety inducing and daunting JKHDAFSDKJFHKJ. anyways 6th is cute too

FUuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuoooouuoock me. I got to 626 to pay my respect to Stitch and i mess up gojng down from 323 and put 321. I never wanted to cry so bad. I wanted to scream into the void. I cant even with this challenge. I restarted and back at 404. Its 1:25 and deadline 5. Hopefully itll be enough time.

OK, so I definitely won't win immunity, but I tried to do well!  I don't think my submission will be good enough, but I can hope and pray it is!!  I don't even know if I fucked up, but I don't think I did... so hopefully 317 is the number for me!!

In other tea time news, Nathan... ya... um... when you see this I want you to truly understand how heartbroken I am at what happened.  I knew with all the strong-minded gameplay and trust you had in me that we would've been final 2 given the chance, but I also think that what threw me off was Annabelle's constant tea spilling at Sharky and the fact that your closest allies (aside from myself) were her and Maynor, who I like but have little to no actual game relationship with.  In addition, your desire to take out Matt every single round of the merge?  Wig.

I also found out Bryce was the other Matt vote during the merge vote... so... wow I'm powerful....

According to me and Bryce's plans in this game, ideally, Sharky will go this round... but after sending home Nathan last round, my whole ass heart is on some different shit.  I just feel like me doing that would be another rough ass round, and I don't think I could handle it.  It was easier when people like Nick, who annoyed me on a game level, were the names being thrown out, especially with how cocky he was... but now I'm like... wow, these people?  Amazing.

I think Sharky winning immunity wouldn't be too bad because then I can finally push Annabelle out and won't have to worry about her, so I'm banking on that!  I don't wanna ruin Bryce and I's plans in this game, I just feel more confident sitting with Sharky than like anyone else.

I also think my relationship with Maynor is so much better, and I can actually work with him further down the road.  He sketched me out a lot in the past, but I really think it's a solid ally for me if I can get him passed this round.  Annabelle or Sharky are the ideal targets, but I'm really feeling an Annabelle vote this round.  I may not be in the best spot for immunity this round, but I know I'll have my A-game on and ready next round, so I'm READY.

I was doing so well in this challenge. I had like 900 and I screwed up. Now I'm feeling the pressure. And I keep messing up. Now I've got less than 3 hours to make it up and hopefully finally win something. Brian told me he did not do well. And I don't want anyone else to win because it will limit our options going forward.

I'm over it. I screwed up HARD. And now I have like no time to recover. I'm over it.

I decided to go back to 626. And at 2:41pm i was able to get back down to 1. Im happy but i really hope that was enough because if it wasnt then im going to cry. I really want to win this. Stitch my favorite please give me luck. 🦑

last round was so risky i hope it doesnt just get me 6th. i tried to get together with anna again and i think we are but maynor not so much which sucks but as long as brian is real with wanting to keep me i should be good imagine if it was fake and he wasnt really taking me to the end NNN adsjkfhadskj the gag of the season? but ugh sharky really wants me out again like maybe get a clue and stop.

That was upsetting. But Bryce did really well so I applaud him. Its most likely going to be me tomorrow night. It sucks but i can at least try and see if i can find a way to stay.

There is some hope. Annabelle and I want to make it a tie with Matt. And when its rock time, Brian or Sharky hopefully get the odd color and they are sent home. Thats the only play right now that I think can save me. I have to rely on Bryce who i dont trust at all anymore. But kind of have to if i want to survive tomorrow.

i'm down for some mutual destruction this vote. I hope that this pays off or it could totally fuck me over but it is what it is if this works out i'll take this as like a win for nathan and i'll  be in a much better spot i think. wish me luck <3

I WON IMMUNITY PPL CAN TRY TO COME FOR ME BUT THEY CANT SURE MAYBE I PLAYED BAD IDK I HAVE BAD SENSE OF SELF WORTH BUT MAYBE I DID PLAY WELL BUT MAYBE I DIDNT BUT U KNOW WHAT IS TRUE AND FACTS!!! ME WINNING THIS IMMUNITY. BRIAN DOESNT WANT TO VOTE SHARKY ALL OF A SUDDEN WHICH IS SKETCH BUT NOW THAT I HAVE IMMUNITY IM NOT AFRAID OF VOTING SHARKY AND HOPING ANNABELLE AND MAYNOR VOTE WITH ME IM TALKING IN CAPS BC IM SO EXCITED MY STOMACH WAS LITERALLY A MESS ALL DAY BC OF HOW NERVOUS I WAS COUNTING UP AND DOWN AND SEVERAL BREAKDOWNS LATER I WON WOOOOOOOHHOOO IT REALLY IS BRYCE HISTORY MONTH!!!! anyways yaa i hope f5 is me brian matt maynor anna and that brian is real one and uses vote steal there so we auto have immunity but maybe i try to win immunity again anyway to make sure im safe.... but then at f5 i think anna has to go but she'll be so mad idk maybe maynor.. or  maybe matt whomst knows KJASDHFKJS but wooh in this moment... i am at peace

Im convinced annabelle is like a marine biologist or something with how much she loves sharky! i just want him out KFJASDHFKJ i love being pushy jk i literally hate it but i just want him out its not a lot to ask and i feel like im getting played idk but at this point my loyalty is to brian so if he betrays me its like w/e NNN just hoping itll work out maybe i comp my way into a losing finalist spot... anyways i just got into dear evan hansen again so love that renewed obsession

The Fajita Fellas are actually a solid alliance. I know I've been skeptical of Bryce in the past but I'm actually starting to trust him which is cool. HOWEVER it's also an issue because if I'm going to keep trying to save Anna it's only going to get harder. I'm hoping this vote will be easy squeezy. I told the FF that Maynor is easy and least likely to have an idol. They seem good with that. So...we'll see.

I am very nervous for tonight. I am 2 of the options for Sharky, Brian, and Matt to do. Annabell and I are throwing each other under the bus to them. But our plan is to vote Sharky and hoping have Bryce with us and cause a tie. And on the revote hope one flips on Sharky or we go to rocks. And hopefully Matt or Brian get the rocks.

The vote is me tonight. If plan goes according to it should be 3 vote sharky and 3 vote me. Im really hoping they flip on sharky or that Matt or Brian get rocked out. 🤞🤞🤞

So this vote seems so simple, its like kinda amazing for once. Last tribal had so much deceit and lying to get Nathan out and this tribal is like. so. quiet? you could literally hear a pin drop. Maynor and Anna seem like they have legit given up trying to get further, with both apparently voting for the other. How quiet it is is making me slightly nervous, but I do know that if i do somehow leave i am very proud of my game I have played. and I will have the same placement as Standrea so like nothing could be wrong with that huh?

The vote ties, 3 votes Maynor and 3 votes Sharky.

Im died. It worked but now here is hoping for matt or brian to flip. Im scared n excited.

bro... wtf. Can I say I am mad at Bryce? no not really I saw this coming from a mile off, hell even from the other side as the Atlantic. so like mad? nah? Its just... making me so sad. Like I REALLY DO NOT want to go home, i've been through too much to get to this point. But like,... I REALLY love sharky as a person. Like, I love him loads so this is a REALLY hard decision. Fuck my life I don't know what to do

I HATE REVOTES. SO. MUCH. i AM REFUSING TO TELL ANNA ANYTHING cause i like know she will immediately run to sharky and if I am to flip I am gonna tell him first not let him hear via Anna cause that is fucking SHADY. she's just pissing me off tbqh and its just like??? at least be cordial and get off invisible for fucking once

i think the plan worked? it was so awk trying to talk to matt i felt bad but i hope he understands he said he did so! and like... idk its just so hm idk idk. hm. like brian and matt both prob gonna flip wooh. matt said i played well so maybe i did like i tend to never think i played well but maybe i did but maybe hes just lying so KJFSDHJFA wooh

BRIAN IS THE SKETCHIEST PERSON IVE EVER PLAYED WITH I JUST WANNA GO TO THE END WITH HIM BUT HES LITERALLY BACKSTABBING ME I WANTED HIM TO JUST 4-2 SHARKY BUT NO HE WANTED TO MAKE IT GO TO ROCKS TO FEEL BETTER OR WELL GO TO TIE NOT ROCKS AND NOW HES LIKE SORRY SHARKY HAS TO STAY LIKE NO HE ACTUALLY DOESNT HAVE TO STAY IF U VOTE HIM AND ANNA STOPS BEING FAKE AND TRYING TO KEEP HIM WHEN HES DONE NOTHING BUT LIE TO HER AHHHH THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING SJDKFHADSKJFHSDKJF DSHFKJADSHFKJADSHFKASJFHKADSJFHADSKJSKFHASDKJFHASKJFAHKJFS ps: i love everyone in this game... but in this moment? i was ATTACKED

It’s almost about that time. 20 more minutes. I am very nervous. I hope that Bryce and Annabelle stick with me and hope Matt or Brian flipped if not then at least go to rocks. Im really hoping that this move works. But this final 6. I ❤️ Annabelle. ❤️ Sharky. ❤️ Brian. ❤️ Bryce. ❤️ Matt. They are all awesome.

Brian is rocked out.

[skiasurveys]

1. When did you both get together? we started to flirt/hang out around april 2016, we officially started dating in may 2016 though.

2. Who made the first move?  he did

3. How long have you been a couple? its been 2 years and 2 months

4. How did you first meet?  online dating app

5. Were you already close friends before going out as a couple?  not rly, we tried to date before and that lasted for a week..didnt talk for a while. when we got back into contact around end of the march of 2016 we kinda were “friends” but not rly.

6. Are you/Were you ever in the same class at school?  no

7. Are you long-distance?  nope

8. Are you in an open, regular or committed relationship? committed

9. Do you live together?  we did for a bit. not anymore. were planning on finding our own place soon though now that we both have jobs

10. Are you engaged? If yes, describe your proposal. If no, what ring would you like?  yeah we got engaged in feb. basically connor wanted this TV he found on kijiji and we went to go get it. it was in a town that was 40 mins away, anyways on the way back we pulls over on the side of the road and im like wtf and then he got down on his knee and asked me to marry him. it took me by surprised, bc i wasnt expecting it obvs and i didnt think he would ever ask me tbh bc he said he didnt like the idea of marriage.

11. Are you married? If yes, describe your wedding. If no, would you consider marriage?  ^ yeah

12. Which one of you is older? What is the age difference?  he is by 6.5 yrs

13. Which one of you is taller? What is the height difference?  he is by a foot 

14. Do you share any of the same hobbies/interests/passions? yeah we like the same movies, tv shows, video games

15. What fictional couples would you compare yourselves to? idk lol

16. Sum up your relationship in 6 words or less.  were comfortable and happy

17. Doodle a little picture of you both as a couple.  no

18. Describe your relationship using only emoticons.  :3

19. Share a cute photo of you both together.  check my instagram @ wolfkhid

ATTRACTION

20. Top 5 fav things about your partner. he is funny, handsome, tall, he understands me,hes smart

21. Your partner’s top 5 fav things about you. ask him

22. What physical traits do you find most attractive about your partner? his face and his arms/hands. mmm

23. What physical traits does your partner find most attractive about you? he likes that im small, he likes my body shape (short stacked)

24. What personality traits do you find most attractive about your partner? he is funny,  he tells me the truth, hes honest

25. What personality traits does your partner find most attractive about you?  he likes that im caring and that im funny

26. Do you hold hands in public? Any other public displays of affection?  we do sometimes. he doesnt like pda too much. he’ll smack my ass tho lol

27. List your top 3 turn-ons about your partner. he is tall, his domiance, and hes funny 

28. List your partner’s top 3 turn-ons about you.  im small, my ass and im submissive 

29. How would you seduce your partner? How would they seduce you? food obviously.

30. Innocently or not, where do you like your partner to touch you?  my thighs or sides

31. Describe your partner’s eyes. Amber brown and round. theyre really nice. im not poetic  32. Describe your partner’s hair. dark brown, short and messy lol 

33. Describe your partner’s smile. happiness

34. What is your partner’s voice like? deep and nice 

35. What is your partner’s scent like? idk how to explain it

36. How does your partner impress you? How do you impress them? harfcore eating skills

37. What outfit would you like to see your partner in? What would they like to see you wear?  he likes me in short skirts and thigh high socks. i honestly dont care what he wears as long as its nice. he looks good in skinnyish jeans

38. Show your fav picture of your partner that they’ve posted online. not sure if he would be okay with that LOL

ROMANCE 39. Do you have cute pet names for each other? yeah

40. What’s one of your favourite memories as a couple?  theres so many

41. Describe your favourite date so far? when we played super smash bros at the college

42. What’s the sweetest thing that your partner’s ever done for you? paid off my credit card bill. made me a really nice  salad, etc

43. Do either of you get jealous? i do lol cus im insecure. he doesnt unless he does and i just dont know  

44. Is one of you protective of the other? we both are

45. How do you both like to kiss? passionate 

46. How do you both like to cuddle? all tangled up

47. What’s a gift that you’ve given to your partner? And one they’ve given to you? i got him some nice cologne and he gave me some money to pay off my card, and also he got me a nice ring

48. Are you an openly mushy couple or a reserved couple? reserved honestly

49. Does one of you like to cook for the other? we both do

50. Do you have unique ringtones/images for each other on your phones?  not unique 

51. Have you ever had your initials written on a tree or in the sand? haha no

52. What’s “your song”? i cant help falling in love with you

53. Do you own any items that are a special symbol of your relationship? sure

54. What did you both do for Valentine’s Day? he proposed to me :D

55. Do you express your love lavishly or discreetly?  both?

56. What’s the funniest thing you can remember your partner doing? theres a lot..lol he pretended to be a snake

57. Does thinking about your partner still give you butterflies?  kinda

58. What’s the weirdest part of your relationship? everything hahah

BEING TOGETHER 59. Fav things to do together on a rainy day? playing WoW together, or watching movies, or going to get Thai food!

60. Fav things to do together on a sunny day? Same thing, go for walks maybe bike ride.

61. Got any plans together for next week? not really. hes going biking with his friends and im working lol but ill prob spend the night on Saturday

62. What’s your favourite thing to share together? Food

63. What did you do for your partner’s latest birthday? What did they do for yours? nothing for him, he doesnt like birthday parties so we didnt do anything, but i bought him a present. He gave me some money, and we hung out, except he worked that night so we couldnt do much.

64. Where would you like to go on holiday together? maybe Disneyland

65. You have a whole weekend to yourselves and 500 in cash- what do you do? maybe we go to Banff and have a nice stay there

66. How would you comfort your partner on a bad day? How would they comfort you? I would make him a nice meal maybe or rub his back. I would tell him everything is OK. It depends on whats bothering him. For me he would hold me and watch movies with me and kiss me.

67. Where would you both get takeout together? thai place downtown i forget the name

68. What’s the longest time you’ve been apart?  About 1 month and 1 week, he went to Prince George to see his Dad and some family. 

69. What things remind you of your partner? What things remind them of you? Pokemon honestly lol and idk honestly. maybe nuggets

70. Has your relationship changed at all since it first started? well yeah! we are more closer, i feel like i can be myself. 

71. Have you ever worked on a project together?  kinda. not rly.

72. Have you both influenced each other in any way? sure

73. Have either of you made sacrifices for this relationship? yes. Connor literally slept behind a couch for like 7 months because he wanted to stay in RD and didnt want to leave me, and he didnt have a place. (he couldnt stay with me b/c my family is really conservative and we couldnt afford a place together). He honestly is so wonderful. He now has a place

74. Has you discovered anything surprising about your partner? yes. 

75. How have you both made a positive impact on each other’s lives?  i would hope so.

76. What do you both mutually agree is the most important part of your relationship? honesty, conversation/communication, loyalty. 

EVERYDAY LIFE 77. What are the everyday things you both do to show you care about each other? being there for each other, talking, etc.

78. Do you follow each other’s blogs/twitter/instagram? yes but he doesnt have IG or Twitter, but i follow him on other stuff

79. Is there a favourite place that you both frequently go to together? not really.

80. What TV shows do you like to watch together? theres too many to name honestly.

81. How do you relax together? chilling and netflix

82. What sleep positions do you tend to sleep together in? spooning usually, or tangled up. depends on how hot it is though

83. Do you borrow each other’s clothes or other items? not so much clothes but items yes

84. Do you ever share the bathroom together? yeah 

85. How do you both keep in touch when you’re away from each other? texting

86. Do you share secrets between each other?  yes

87. Do you rotate house chores or do you each have assigned chore duties? well we dont live together but i help him clean his place if he needs help. But if we were to live together we would rotate it.

88. Do you remember how your partner takes their coffee/tea/bar drinks?  he doesnt like coffee or tea and doesnt drink so much

89. What does your partner think of your Tumblr? nothing?? i guess?? he doesnt rly care he doesnt check on it

90. What characters do you play as together when playing multiplayer games? we do a lot of rpg games

COMPATABILITY 91. Are you both introverted/extroverted or opposites?  hes more intro than me, but im like a mix/

92. Who is the more dominant/submissive one? hes the dom for sure

93. What are some major differences between you both? he is more messy, and chill/care free than me.

94. When are you both “in your element” together? what

95. Who would win in an arm-wrestling contest? him obvs

96. What are each of your zodiac signs and how do they compare? he is a Taurus and im  Sagittarius . and idk b/c i dont read up on that shit

97. What are each of your MBTI types and how do they compare? omg idk what his is! im an isfj

98. What are each of your Hogwarts houses and how do they compare? n/a

99. If you were both in a dating sim, what character tropes would each of you be? idk

100. If you were both animals what would you be? Would you be the same animal?  he would be a cat, id be a raccoon obvs

101. How does your partner’s wardrobe differ from yours?  he is more laid back, just jeans and tshirts, or sweat pants. I wear a lot of nice shirts, skinny jeans/ leggings and buisness casual if i have too

102. Have you ever both said something at the exact same time? yea

103. Rate your relationship on a scale of basic vanilla (1) to extremely kinky (10)  um like maybe a 7

104. Mix your fav colour with your partner’s fav colour- what is the result? Magenta

105. If you were both ingredients, what would each of you be and what would be the resulting recipe? (e.g. PB & jelly sandwich) ummm lol idk

106. Which of you would win in a Pokemon battle? Assign yourself and your partner a fitting Pokemon type (e.g. water, grass, poison etc). Are either of you super effective against the other? he obvs cus he knows more about POkemon lol

CONFLICT 107. What happens when you argue with each other? How do you both make up? we stay silent for a bit or we talk it out. 

108. What’s something that your partner does that annoys you? How do you annoy them? he doesnt text back all the time -_- and i probably annoy him with my constant questions or reassurance

109. What are some imperfections that you love about your partner? he is a derp

110. What are some imperfections that your partner loves about you? 

111. Has your partner ever accidentally hurt you? Have you accidentally hurt them? i have scratched him by accident, and he has bruised me while wrestling lol

112. Is there anything about you that your partner just doesn’t understand? yeah my mental illnes

113. Is there anything about your partner that you just don’t understand? why does every little thing make him mad lol

114. When was the last time you cried about your relationship and why? idk 

115. What is something you love that your partner hates? im not sure honestly.

116. What is something you hate that your partner loves? anime

117. When was the last time you had to apologise to your partner and why? when i got mad at him and was being a smart ass

118. Do either of you get too clingy? both of us but me abit more

119. Do you have any insecurities about your relationship? yep.

120. When was a time that your relationship was put to the test? never?

121. What would your partner have to do to make you end the relationship?  cheat on me honestly, or just start changing completely.

RELATIONS 122. Does your family approve of your relationship? yes

123. What do your friends think of your relationship?  they like him

124. How do you both act together around others as opposed to when you’re alone together? when we are around others we can tease eachother and just be together but when were alone were more open, flirt more, etc

125. How did you first reveal to people that you were going out?  told them..and also facebook

126. Do you think you and your partner look similar to each other? lol not really..i mean we both have dark eyes and hair, but i dont think we look anything a like. He has some turkish in him too so theres that lol im just a white bitch

127. How does your partner treat you special compared to everyone else in their life? he opens up to me, tells me his deep secrets, teases me, etc

128. Do you both have a mutual friend group, or only separate friendship groups?  both, but his friends dont rly see my friends that much haha

129. What’s a common misconception about your relationship? earlier it was that he was too old for me. idk what ppl think anymore

130. Has your relationship affected any of your relations with others? i dont think so.

131. Has anyone tried to sabotage your relationship? yep

132. Quote something somebody has said about your relationship. “you guys are so cute together!! couple goals”

133. Quote something somebody has said about your partner. “he’s glad your dad is dead” - some cunt LOL

FUTURE 134. What do you hope for the future of your relationship? that we can live in a nice home and be happy lol

135. If you both got married, what would you want your wedding to be like? intimate and small.

136. Can you imagine what your ideal home would look like? something simple.

137. Do you have kids/want to have kids? What would they be like?  we both dont want kids. 

138. If you could do anything for your partner what would you do? make him happy

139. Do you think you’ll still be together when you’re old and wrinkly? i hope so, i believe so

140. Got any relationship advice?  just the basic , dont be with someone all b/c youre lonely. 

[viralhottopics]

X-Plan: Giving Your Kids A Way Out

Friends, as most of you know, I get to spend an hour each week with a group of young people going through addiction recovery. Yes. Young people. Im talking teenagers who are locked away for at least six months as they learn to overcome their addictions. Im always humbled and honored to get this time with these beautiful young souls that have been so incredibly assaulted by a world they have yet to understand. This also comes with the bittersweet knowledge that these kids still have a fighting chance while several of my friends have already had to bury their own children.

Recently I asked these kids a simple question: How many of you have found yourself in situations where things started happening that you werent comfortable with, but you stuck around, mainly because you felt like you didnt have a way out?

They all raised their hands.

Every single one of them.

In the spirit of transparency I get it. Though in my mid-40s, Im still in touch with that awkward boy who often felt trapped in the unpredictable currents of teenage experiences. I cant count the times sex, drugs, and alcohol came rushing into my young world; I wasnt ready for any of it, but I didnt know how to escape and, at the same time, not castrate myself socially. I still recall my first time drinking beer at a friends house in junior high schoolI hated it, but I felt cornered. As an adult, that now seems silly, but it was my reality at the time. Peer pressure was a frivolous term for an often silent but very real thing; and I certainly couldnt call my parents and ask them to rescue me. I wasnt supposed to be there in the first place. As a teen, forcing down alcohol seemed a whole lot easier than offering myself up for punishment, endless nagging and interrogation, and the potential end of freedom as I knew it.

X-Plan

www.BertFulks.com

For these reasons, we now have something called the X-plan in our family. This simple, but powerful tool is a lifeline that our kids are free to use at any time. Heres how it works:

Lets say that my youngest, Danny, gets dropped off at a party. If anything about the situation makes him uncomfortable, all he has to do is text the letter X to any of us (his mother, me, his older brother or sister). The one who receives the text has a very basic script to follow. Within a few minutes, they call Dannys phone. When he answers, the conversation goes like this:

Hello?

Danny, somethings come up and I have to come get you right now.

What happened?

Ill tell you when I get there. Be ready to leave in five minutes. Im on my way.

At that point, Danny tells his friends that somethings happened at home, someone is coming to get him, and he has to leave.

In short, Danny knows he has a way out; at the same time, theres no pressure on him to open himself to any social ridicule. He has the freedom to protect himself while continuing to grow and learn to navigate his world.

www.BertFulks.com

This is one of the most loving things weve ever given him, and it offers him a sense of security and confidence in a world that tends to beat our young people into submission.

However, theres one critical component to the X-plan: Once hes been extracted from the trenches, Danny knows that he can tell us as much or as little as he wants but its completely up to him. The X-plan comes with the agreement that we will pass no judgments and ask no questions (even if he is 10 miles away from where hes supposed to be). This can be a hard thing for some parents (admit it, some of us are complete control-freaks); but I promise it might not only save them, but it will go a long way in building trust between you and your kid.

(One caveat here is that Danny knows if someone is in danger, he has a moral obligation to speak up for their protection, no matter what it may cost him personally. Thats part of the lesson we try to teach our kidswe are our brothers keeper, and sometimes we have to stand for those too weak to stand for themselves. Beyond that, he doesnt have to say a word to us. Ever.)

For many of us parents, we lament the intrusion of technology into our relationships. I hate seeing people sit down to dinner together and then proceed to stare into their phones. It drives me nuts when my kids text me from another room in our house. However, cell phones arent going away so we need to find ways to use this technology to help our kids in any way we can.

Since first publishing this on my personal site, Ive seen an incredible amount of discussion about the pros and cons. Here are some of the questions folks have had:

Doesnt this encourage dishonesty?

Absolutely not. It actually presents an opportunity for you as a parent to teach your kids that they can be honest (something DID come up, and they DO have to leave), while learning that its okay to be guarded in what they reveal to others. They dont owe anyone an explanation the next day, and if asked can give the honest answer, Its private and I dont want to talk about it. Boom! Another chance for a social skill life-lesson from Mom and Dad.

Does this cripple a kid socially instead of teaching them to stand up to others?

I know plenty of adults who struggle to stand up to others. This simply gives your kid a safe way out as you continue to nurture that valuable skill.

What if this becomes habitual?

If youre regularly rescuing your kid, hopefully your family is having some conversations about that.

If you dont talk about it or ask questions, how do they learn?

If youre building a relationship of trust with your kids, theyll probably be the ones to start the conversation. More importantly, most of these conversations need to take place on the FRONT-side of events. Ever taken a cruise? They all make you go through the safety briefing in case the boat sinks. They dont wait until the ships on fire to start telling you about the lifeboats. Talk with them. Let your kids ask questions and give them frank answers.

If theyre not where theyre supposed to be, shouldnt there be consequences?

Lets be honest. A kid in fear of punishment is a lot less likely to reach out for help when the world comes at them. Admitting that theyre in over their heads is a pretty big life lesson all by itself. However, dont get so caught up in all of the details. This isnt a one-size-fits-all scheme. Every parent, every kid, and every situation is unique. What it might look like in your family could be totally different from mineand thats okay.

I urge you to use some form of an X-plan in your home. If you honor it, your kids will thank you for it. You never know when something so simple could be the difference between your kid laughing with you at the dinner table or spending six months in a recovery center or (God forbid) something far worse.

At the end of the day, however, the most important thing is that youre having some open, honest discussions with your kids. Keep building a relationship of trust. This isnt the same world we grew up in. Its not like sneaking a beer at Billys house anymore. Our kids face things on a daily basis thatgiven one bad decisioncan be fatal. Dont believe me? Ive been to funerals for great kids from awesome families.

Friends, its a dangerous world. And our kids are out in it everyday.

Prayers for strength and compassion to the parents out there as we all try to figure out this parenting gigit never gets easy.

Please share this piece. Talk about it with your kids. If this somehow gives just one kid a way out of a bad situation, we can all feel privileged to have been a part of that.

#xplan

Blessings, friends.

This piece originally appeared on www.BertFulks.com

Read more: http://huff.to/2m6fsLP

from X-Plan: Giving Your Kids A Way Out

[somedaypast-thesunset]

i feel upset today because there is a continual expectation for me to put myself out for other people and get next to nothing in return as they ask for everything. and if i ask for something, it just goes ignored. 

i’m tired of my work being devalued. i’m tired of people just taking it for granted and using it to their own benefit. i felt nothing but anxiety and animosity at the last show our group put on because i was knowingly bullied on more than one occasion by another member and then forced to put on a show with them - and was even questioned why i might pull out my art. 

i was going to perform at this event. but as the weeks passed i realized i was putting in more work than anyone else and when i asked for certain things, they were ignored or put off. and yet there was an expectation for me to complete something for them ‘asap’. this made performing for the first time really devalued. like sure, i worked hard to create the event but why? what was the purpose of this? it was never to bring anyone together, it was never to showcase anything but the organizers themselves and the lack of good promotion means the likelihood of selling something at a venue not known for after hours shows and not joining our marketing is pretty low. 

i am 27 years old now. i have no fucking desire to put on shitty teen shows that are half assed thrown together with a bunch of my friends. thats not what this is about for me - it lacks a certain amount of organization and class. it lacks a curation in performers. i thought i might be the worst one - and that’d be okay. they cant all be winners. but now it’s just open mic - and if i really wanted to perform at a open mic, i’d go to a real one. if i’m going to do a large amount of the work - outside of meeting with the owner one time and putting up 5 flyers on street poles - i want the results to be worth the work i put in. and IMO it’s not. it’s mediocre and thrown together. 

and i feel a personal insult about this because of how much work i put intothe group itself. ive dedicated time on a semi regular basis to all the admin work, the promotion, keeping social media active, posting new submissions, fielding a majority of the questions and i’m not asking for praise - i’m asking for people to respect the work i’ve done. don’t come in and draw on it with magic marker and tell me its acceptable quality when theres folks painting in oils. i dedicated time to create an entity that could be used and harnessed; i ask for the quality of our output to match whats already there. 

and i think it’s asinine that i would hve to argue doing better than average. if this is just a hobby or random activity for you - fine. it’s not serious. you’re not serious. none of this matters. but it was presented as serious. it was presented as a showcase of people’s craft. there is no effort into making it somewhere one would wnt to be. we’re all going for the ~decor. we print posters because we want to see our name on a poster in the street - not becuse we’re really advertising an event. it was acceptable that the only people in attendance would be the performers and a few of their friends. acceptable!! that’s an unsuccessful house party, in my opinion. 

you know whats missing  locally? proper use of social media to network between people. it’s impossible to find other artists in the area unless you scour through obscure hashtags. but yet theres dozens and dozens if not hundreds of artists in the local area. this means you get stuck in one influence and within that influence you may be chastised for going against the “norm” of their influence. instead of new ideas being welcomed, they’re constantly turned down or argued against. 

i’ve met all of the people i know through facebook and instagram in my art world. thats a very powerful tool.i know models who only book through instagram. and ive had arguements about the use of hashtags. as if theyre not relevant. 

i’m tired of questioning what i know. tht honestly gives me the most anxiety. and its not like im tired of questioning what i do - its healthy to question your actions - but what i know and believe makes me feel unsure of myself and the skills i have. i have had experience working in the creative industries since i was 17, freelancing. and i have a wide variety of skills in graphic design, retouching photos, photography of models & landscapes & products, glamour modeling & product modeling (of which i’ve done for dozens of photographers in the local area), web design & blogging + knowlege of e-commerce platforms, wordpress, seo, promotion & marketing both online & offline, i’ve sold crafts online for almost four years and switched my primary creative tool from artisan crafts to trditional & figure art that i studied & practiced extensively for over two years, i have skills in copywriting & journalism, i have a handle on the basic laws of creative works & how they can be used, basic knowledge in building & selling a brand, communicating with clients & customers (of which i’ve had no complaints in regards to my communication - ive had complaints about shipping because post offices are not so nice), creating organized file systems which can be used by multiple people -- i have paid my dues. i am still growing, absolutely. i am not the best at any of the above things i listed. i could be even better. i could spend two hours today on one of these skills and be better than i am right now. i can always be better.

but just because i can be better doesnt take away from what i know now, what i have learned, what i have studied - like i took the time to study and read up on research and marketing & promotion techniques. a good portion of my first shop was spent reading about how to sell stuff, not so much making stuff to sell. as i did not realize at the time how much work went into being successful online. and i did not realize until my shop closed how i had taken that skill for granted - because i had done all that work & effort, it was able to pull in a few sales a month with little to no effort now. if i worked harder, maybe i couldve been even better. 

i also (un)willingly have worked full time as an artist and only an artist for at least two years. this is the “luxury” ive been allowed in  life even though i am the definition of starving artist. i didnt have it as a part time job or hobby - it was something i did every single day and i marketed & promoted for hours a day. an acquaintance of mine upon hearing of my mental state now told me that i had gone so hard for so long - and i kind of appreciated that he saw that on the outside. that someone could see that i actully did work incredibly hard. that i was dedicated.. that i AM dedicated. 

i’m not saying any of this makes me better thn anyone else or knowing more - it just means i’m experienced. i am very very experienced in not only practicing a craft but marketing that craft to sell, displaying that craft in it’s best light, knowing the best places to sell. i also work in quality over quantity. i am not interested in doing 9  - 10 shows a year. i’m not interested in shitting out  5 - 7 paintings at a time. it means before i touch anything to paper or canvas or wood - i’ve thought about it. i’ve really, really thought about it. i didnt just sit down and throw paint on the canvas. i couldve been thinking of this image for days before i do it. or the craft itself - my bone jewelry came because i absolutely neded to make a necklace out of fish bones i found and they needed vials attached. why? i dont know. but it just needed to be. 

when i started the group, i asked about names. i didnt choose a name or dictate the name. i was given a suggestion by someone i actually dont like at all and was given a reson for why he felt it was a good suggestion and i agreed because business-wise it was a good suggestion. i respected that he hd different ideas and experiences that shaped that suggestion that i did not have. i learned through it that i should expand my reach - both in my personal creative life and my ‘business’ creative life. 

my ~partner was disappointed i wasn’t going to perform. i could tell it was frustrating and dissappointing to him because i think he thought it wouldve been good for me and that i would hopefully find something in it that would bring me something. and through his disappointment he told me that it wasn’t totally right to drop out of something you planned to do or that peopl expected you to be at.

but i’d like to turn that around - my partner is someone who also puts himself out for others on a regular basis. and for a long, long, long time he was fucked around and fucked over by many people. an old friend came to his door and asked to borrow money and he allowed him to despite knowing he might be a drug addict now. he had no obligation to this person but it was like since he was asked, he should. and i think if he lerned to say no, or learned to walk away from an unhealthy situation, he would be happier as well. i’ve learned first hand the benefit of walking away from something toxic. and you will feel misplaced guilt for a bit, i feel some guilt now but it’s for the best. 

i try to think how i can change my perspective on it but i cannot. i wold not walk down the street if this was held in the local gallery, nevermind 20km away. like once i took myself out as a performer i realized i wouldnt even want to go. i dont want to see anyone perform but my partner; who will already be subdued because of the venue. ive been completely taken out of the organization of the event - despite having been continually involved in the promotion and a few conversations since the lst one where i said i didnt want to keep doing this. so ive deleted my advertisement efforts online andi’m just halting any further promotion on my part of this event. i’m 97% sure i’m personally not even going to go. i no longer ant to see half of the people there on a personal level so it’s not even worth going to to hang out and i dont care about displaying my art. 

[skiasurveys]

doing this cus hes moving away and ill miss his bitch ass

THE BASICS 1. When did you both get together? May 10th 2016 2. Who made the first move?  we both did, i guess. It was mutual. we had dated 5 months previously for like 2 weeks, and we got back into contact and we both knew we liked it eachother. 3. How long have you been a couple? 10 months. will be 11 in april  4. How did you first meet?  OKCUPID 5. Were you already close friends before going out as a couple? I guess so, we had been talking for like a month til we officalized it. 6. Are you/Were you ever in the same class at school?  no. He graduated 5 years before me 7. Are you long-distance?  nope. but we will be in a couple of days :( 8. Are you in an open, regular or committed relationship?  committed. 9. Do you live together? we were going too..but he didnt get a job, so hes moving back home to live with his dad and work there for a bit, and then in the summer we will be moving in together :) 10. Are you engaged? If yes, describe your proposal. If no, what ring would you like? no, and i dont know. 11. Are you married? If yes, describe your wedding. If no, would you consider marriage? No, and yeah id consider. 12. Which one of you is older? What is the age difference? Connor is older. by 6.5 years.  13. Which one of you is taller? What is the height difference?  he is haha, by a foot and 2 inches. Im 5 feet, and he’s 6′2. 14. Do you share any of the same hobbies/interests/passions?  yeah we both like the same stuff, but im more artsy than he is. but we like the same shows/movies/video games.  Thats how we gt  along very well. 15. What fictional couples would you compare yourselves to? i dont know.  16. Sum up your relationship in 6 words or less. happy, strong, crazy, great, safe. 17. Doodle a little picture of you both as a couple <- no 18. Describe your relationship using only emoticons.  cant do this not on my iphone.  19. Share a cute photo of you both together.  i dont know how to share on here, but if you go on my personal account you can find some. just go. Justskia.tumblr.com/tagged/connor 

ATTRACTION 20. Top 5 fav things about your partner. his arms, his humor, his laugh, the way he talks about his passions, his smile. 21. Your partner’s top 5 fav things about you. ask him. 22. What physical traits do you find most attractive about your partner? his arms are really fucking nice. and his height. 23. What physical traits does your partner find most attractive about you? i know he likes how small i am, and short and my butt for sure cause im short stacked lolol 24. What personality traits do you find most attractive about your partner? His humour really.  He is very funny, and I like how real he is with him. He’s romantic and senstive and he only shows that to me.  25. What personality traits does your partner find most attractive about you? i dont know, ask him. He likes that Im good company, that I dont complain and bitch him out, and that i make him happy, but i dont know ask him lol 26. Do you hold hands in public? Any other public displays of affection? if we do show PDA its either like hand holding or like a kiss on the cheek. 27. List your top 3 turn-ons about your partner. His arms, his aggressiveness, and his facial hair 28. List your partner’s top 3 turn-ons about you. ask him. 29. How would you seduce your partner? How would they seduce you? I dont really need to seduce him. 30. Innocently or not, where do you like your partner to touch you?  my sides or upper thigh. 31. Describe your partner’s eyes. dark brown, they are kinda sad and it breaks my heart. 32. Describe your partner’s hair.  Brown and messy but like a nice messy. 33. Describe your partner’s smile. His smile is big, and he smiles with his eyes and it makes me feel homesick, and I love it. 34. What is your partner’s voice like?  deep but not too deep. Like rough, but sweet. I love it. 35. What is your partner’s scent like? manly and musky,its so fucking nice. 36. How does your partner impress you? How do you impress them? he tries to show off how strong and good he is at his video games. hilarious. I just try to show off how funny and cute i am.  37. What outfit would you like to see your partner in? What would they like to see you wear? i wouldnt mind him in like plaid shirts and I know he lieks me in mini skirt and socks. 38. Show your fav picture of your partner that they’ve posted online. not gonna post that just cause i dont know how he would feel.

ROMANCE 39. Do you have cute pet names for each other? not really. 40. What’s one of your favourite memories as a couple? I have way too many. seriously. I like the one where he called me at 11:30 Pm saying he knew i was lonely and that he could come get me, that was nice. but i have lots. 41. Describe your favourite date so far? honestly, i cant think of one. Our first date was so fun but not my fav..idk 42. What’s the sweetest thing that your partner’s ever done for you? hes been there for me when i needed him. 43. Do either of you get jealous? i do. 44. Is one of you protective of the other? i am and he is too. 45. How do you both like to kiss? just like kissing normally, but i like to press my tongue on his tongue.  46. How do you both like to cuddle? either when were spooning, or i lay my head on his chest, or he lays on me. 47. What’s a gift that you’ve given to your partner? And one they’ve given to you? Idk I give him a lot of shit. He gave me his truck. 48. Are you an openly mushy couple or a reserved couple? half n half 49. Does one of you like to cook for the other? im a bad cook. 50. Do you have unique ringtones/images for each other on your phones? no but i have a image of him on my phone  51. Have you ever had your initials written on a tree or in the sand? no but i could  52. What’s “your song”? I cant help falling in love with you 53. Do you own any items that are a special symbol of your relationship? a few 54. What did you both do for Valentine’s Day?  we didnt do much really, actually. 55. Do you express your love lavishly or discreetly? discreetly kinda. 56. What’s the funniest thing you can remember your partner doing? hes so fucking funny. I cant choose. dont make me  57. Does thinking about your partner still give you butterflies? yeah 58. What’s the weirdest part of your relationship? that people keep trying to take us away. 

BEING TOGETHER 59. Fav things to do together on a rainy day? watch a series 60. Fav things to do together on a sunny day? Go for a walk or something  61. Got any plans together for next week? spending my finale days with him until we see eachother again.  62. What’s your favourite thing to share together? my bed. 63. What did you do for your partner’s latest birthday? What did they do for yours? he actually didnt want to do anything for his birthday, but for mine we just hung out and were cute together/ had dinner. 64. Where would you like to go on holiday together? somewhere far. like disney.  65. You have a whole weekend to yourselves and 500 in cash- what do you do? I dont know, thats not a lot of money.  Probably a night in Banff  66. How would you comfort your partner on a bad day? How would they comfort you? Just like hug him or let him know Im there, and hed probably cuddle me 67. Where would you both get takeout together? probably some thai or chinese food. 68. What’s the longest time you’ve been apart? 5 months 69. What things remind you of your partner? What things remind them of you? anime. and I dont know. 70. Has your relationship changed at all since it first started? we have gotten more close and he tells me more. hes more open. 71. Have you ever worked on a project together? no 72. Have you both influenced each other in any way? yeah 73. Have either of you made sacrifices for this relationship? oh god yeah. 74. Has you discovered anything surprising about your partner? yes  75. How have you both made a positive impact on each other’s lives? i like to think so  76. What do you both mutually agree is the most important part of your relationship? communication 

EVERYDAY LIFE 77. What are the everyday things you both do to show you care about each other? just talking to eachother, spending time with them.  78. Do you follow each other’s blogs/twitter/instagram? he doesnt have those. 79. Is there a favourite place that you both frequently go to together? subway hahaha 80. What TV shows do you like to watch together? way too fucking many. 81. How do you relax together? Movies, cuddles, sex. 82. What sleep positions do you tend to sleep together in? spooning.  83. Do you borrow each other’s clothes or other items? no 84. Do you ever share the bathroom together? yeah 85. How do you both keep in touch when you’re away from each other? Texting, phone calls, psn calls 86. Do you share secrets between each other? yeah 87. Do you rotate house chores or do you each have assigned chore duties? we dont live together. 88. Do you remember how your partner takes their coffee/tea/bar drinks? he doesn tlike coffee  89. What does your partner think of your Tumblr? he doesnt know mine haha  90. What characters do you play as together when playing multiplayer games?  we play eso 

COMPATABILITY 91. Are you both introverted/extroverted or opposites? Hes introverted and im ambiverted.  92. Who is the more dominant/submissive one? hes more dom, and im sub. 93. What are some major differences between you both? He is more real, just tells things how they are, i like to sugar coat shit. 94. When are you both “in your element” together? in my room 95. Who would win in an arm-wrestling contest? he would  96. What are each of your zodiac signs and how do they compare? im a sag, and hes a taurus  97. What are each of your MBTI types and how do they compare?  i dont know his actually 98. What are each of your Hogwarts houses and how do they compare?  i dont know lmao  99. If you were both in a dating sim, what character tropes would each of you be?  i dont fucking know man  100. If you were both animals what would you be? Would you be the same animal? hed be a cat for sure.. 101. How does your partner’s wardrobe differ from yours? hes just more dude like? 102. Have you ever both said something at the exact same time? yeah sure  103. Rate your relationship on a scale of basic vanilla (1) to extremely kinky (10)  like a 6-7  104. Mix your fav colour with your partner’s fav colour- what is the result? its make like a violet  105. If you were both ingredients, what would each of you be and what would be the resulting recipe? (e.g. PB & jelly sandwich) im fucking dead at this question  106. Which of you would win in a Pokemon battle? As sign yourself and your partner a fitting Pokemon type (e.g. water, grass, poison etc). Are either of you super effective against the other? hed win.

CONFLICT 107. What happens when you argue with each other? How do you both make up? We have had only 2 huge arguments, usually we just do what people do and just fight and just get it over with..talk it out. we dont fight really, and im happy for that. we do get into little bickering shit but thats it.

108. What’s something that your partner does that annoys you? How do you annoy them? when he games for more than like 10 hours or whatever, like I actually don’t care if hes gaming, hes relaxing for me to being doing my own thing and him doing his. But sometimes he does online game a lot and is chating with friends for really long periods at a time and its like yo can we like chill and talk. But im not crazy like i want him to spend time with his friends but there is a limit i guess. and I think i annoy him when im constantly texting him n he doesnt respond. But he doesnt rly tell me what annoys him

109. What are some imperfections that you love about your partner? his little ego haha he is always bragging about how great he is at something and i love it. He’s not a jackass or douche about stuff but sometimes hes bragging and im like smh 

110. What are some imperfections that your partner loves about you? i dont know, i don’t wanna ask LOL 111. Has your partner ever accidentally hurt you? Have you accidentally hurt them? Physically and emotionally? yeah. who hasnt though? I did hit his head once and he was like wtf? and it was by accident ahah. But yeah i have said shit to him where it hurt him and its like fuck i didn tmean it like that. It sucks

112. Is there anything about you that your partner just doesn’t understand? probably my mental health to be at most part. He doesnt understand some things i do.

113. Is there anything about your partner that you just don’t understand? yeah like why does he try so hard to act like he doesnt care when he does. Its kinda weird. 114. When was the last time you cried about your relationship and why? today but thats cause hes moving away today, and so i was crying with him cus i didnt want him to go.

115. What is something you love that your partner hates? cringe  116. What is something you hate that your partner loves? anime  117. When was the last time you had to apologise to your partner and why? Today because i by accident was being a little too pushy and i felt so bad.  118. Do either of you get too clingy? me at most part i think. i like his clingyness but he isnt too clingy actually 

119. Do you have any insecurities about your relationship? yeah, i do. Just cause i hate myself and im scared he will find someone else.

120. When was a time that your relationship was put to the test? i dont know? 121. What would your partner have to do to make you end the relationship? cheat, break the law ( like murder/rape/rob a bank lmao), insult my family too extreme for no reason. 

RELATIONS 122. Does your family approve of your relationship? meh, not really. whatever 123. What do your friends think of your relationship? they think he’s super nice and that he makes me happy. 124. How do you both act together around others as opposed to when you’re alone together? hes more romantic with me and like more feely but when were with friends hes like reserved but he doesnt like hide our relationship.

125. How did you first reveal to people that you were going out? i took a picture of us together and posted it on instagram and facebook i believe and then i just told people. 

126. Do you think you and your partner look similar to each other? both have brown eyes but thats it lol 

127. How does your partner treat you special compared to everyone else in their life? he spends his time with me the most, he tells me everything ( well at least i think he does haha ), hes opened with me. Hes very reserved around others. 

128. Do you both have a mutual friend group, or only separate friendship groups? separate, but i do like hanging with his friends. 

129. What’s a common misconception about your relationship?  oh that hes “way too old for her” hes only 6 years older, its not 16 years smh. also that people think that I let him walk on me and do what he wants but I don’t let that, i do let him do what he wants but he doesnt walk all over me. 

130. Has your relationship affected any of your relations with others? yeah. 131. Has anyone tried to sabotage your relationship? yeah. a few actually. fuck them.  132. Quote something somebody has said about your relationship. “i dont see why you waste your time” that is what some ppl say. a lot of people like us together but some don’t. dont know why, actually. 

133. Quote something somebody has said about your partner. he seems really nice or that he makes me happy or that hes too old like wtf no in between.

FUTURE 134. What do you hope for the future of your relationship? i hope that we grow as individuals and in our relationship and that we make it offical. RING BABY. 

135. If you both got married, what would you want your wedding to be like?  my dream wedding is something small but not too small but not big where i dont know half the people. something fun that represents us as our relationship but sometimes romantic too.

136. Can you imagine what your ideal home would look like? yeah, i guess probably like studio apartment, or something. idk we dont reallt talk about that. 

137. Do you have kids/want to have kids? What would they be like? no and no  138. If you could do anything for your partner what would you do? i would get him a nice place for him to stay, a really nice 4K TV and maybe take him somewhere where he wants to go.

139. Do you think you’ll still be together when you’re old and wrinkly? honestly i do  140. Got any relationship advice? dont let people tell you what to do. If you want to be with them, be with them. But make sure to pay attention for warning signs too though