#but i had my eyes on this cutie since forever and so finally i had motivation

[raplinenthusiasts]

I'm just a cute boy - Wonwoo probably

for @seoksoonwoo 🤍

[bitteriekitten]

you make me wanna blush.

synopsis — telling your lads boyfriends that you have a crush on them <3

warnings — just disgusting fluff i fear

featuring — xavier, zayne, rafayel, sylus, & caleb (separate fics)

notes — this is my first fluffy work and it's reminding me how single i am irl 😀 also if u want to be tagged in my future works don't forget to send me an ask asap! anyway have fun reading and lmk what yall think!! love u lots <3

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After receiving a weirdly ominous text from you–we need to talk, ASAP–Xavier was relieved to notice the shy smile on your face. It didn’t seem that important after all, but his curiosity was already piqued. As he sat on the empty chair next to you, he smiled when you tucked in a strand of hair behind your ear. “I’m here. What did you need to tell me?” he asked you.

You glanced at your boyfriend and immediately looked away, your face heating up. “I have something to tell you…” you muttered. 

Xavier waited for you to continue talking, scooting closer to you. He leaned closer to you and blinked curiously. 

“I… have a crush on you, Xavier.”

Xavier let out a laugh and grabbed your hand, kissing it firmly and then letting it rest against his cheek. “That’s what got you so worked up?” he teased, contradicting the quickening of his heartbeat. 

“Hey! Confessing to you like this takes hard work!” you protested and squished your boyfriend’s cheek in your hands. Xavier chuckled and kissed your palm, “Don’t worry, I have a crush on you too.”

Zayne could already tell that you were up to something from the way you were trying to stifle your grin. He sat across from you on the dining table, where you kept stealing glances at him. Zayne wiped the corner of his mouth for any crumbs and focused his attention onto you.

“Okay, what are you up to?” he asked directly. 

You grinned at your boyfriend, “I… have a huge crush on someone.” you replied.

Zayne raised an eyebrow at that; that was not what he was expecting. But he finally knew what you were up to. He then smiled, picking up an uneaten macaron from the box you bought for him earlier. “Is that so? Tell me who this person is.”

You giggled, glad that he was playing along. “Well, he’s a really good doctor at Akso Hospital… and he’s super smart…”

Zayne hummed, “He sounds familiar. Is he a colleague of mine?”

“Hmm, does a Dr. Zayne Li ring any bells?” 

Zayne chuckled and gestured for you to open your mouth, where he then gently placed the macaron into it. “That’s good to know, because I believe this Dr. Zayne Li has a crush on you too.” he said. You laughed at his reply, kissing his fingertips as you chew down on the macaron. 

Rafayel thought he’d gone deaf, “What did you just say?”

“I said, I have a crush on somebody.” you repeated, your smile growing wider. Rafayel frowned deeply; why would you have a crush on somebody else when he was right there? 

“You’re being ridiculous, cutie. I’m literally right here! Why would you have crushes when I’m right here?”

You rolled your eyes, letting out an exasperated laugh. “I have a crush on you, dummy!” you said.

It takes Rafayel a while to register what you had just told him. By the time it sinks in, you were already bent over laughing at him. Rafayel whined, “Hey, this isn’t funny!” he protested, pulling you into his arms. You continued to giggle, “It’s a little funny–you got so worked up!”

Rafayel affectionately rolled his eyes at you, opting to place a thousand kisses over your face to shut you up instead. 

“Sylus.”

Sylus looked up from his phone with a hum. You walked into your shared bedroom in just his shirt, your face still wet from washing it. “What is it, sweetie?” he asked, holding out his hand for you to take. He pulled you into his embrace, placing a gentle kiss to your head as you sat with your back to his chest. 

“I… have a crush.”

“Oh?” Sylus smirked, instantly getting what you were up to. You nodded, your face hilariously serious for such a tiny thing. “Yeah. I’ve had it since forever.” you replied in a hilariously serious tone.

“Is that so? On who?” he asked, playing along. You let out a breathless laugh as his large hands began massaging your back. “I’d like to know so I can… have a little chat with this person,” he added.

“Well, how are you going to have this little chat with yourself, then?” you asked, turning your head to face him. Sylus let out his signature expensive laugh and kissed your nose.

 “Alright, you’ve outsmarted me, kitten.” he said fondly.

Nothing can ever truly bypass Caleb, not even your harmless pranks. He could already see what you were up to from miles away, but he pretends to be oblivious about it anyway. 

“So, Caleb…” you said, grabbing his arm and letting it rest over your shoulder so you could be closer to him. Caleb welcomes this skinship, trying his best not to smile. “Yeah, Pipsqueak?” he asked.

You hesitated for a moment, biting your lip as if you were actually nervous. Caleb chuckles and slides his arm down to your waist, pulling you closer to his chest. 

“I… have a crush on somebody.”

Caleb scoffed, “Really now? Who is this lucky person?” 

You pretended to think about it, “Mmm, I don’t wanna tell you… you might know who he is.”

Caleb smirked, of course you wouldn’t tell him right away. “Aw shucks, I wanted to tell you who my crush is if you had told me yours.” he said with a faux pout. 

You immediately snap your attention to his words, trying to find out if he was messing with you or not, “You’re not being fair!” you whined. Caleb laughed at your reaction, hugging you with both of his arms around you this time. “Then just tell me who this mystery man is and I’ll tell you who my crush is!”

“It’s you, obviously!” you said, pouting up at Caleb. He cooed at your flustered face and kissed the apples of your cheeks. “That’s great to know, Pipsqueak, because I have a crush on you too.” he sighed, his lips against your flushed skin.

[lateatnewyork]

LIKE MOTHER LIKE DAUGHTER! 001

pairing: oscar piastri x pop princess!reader

summary: yn is taylor and travis' "child" and oscar's had a crush on her since her disney days or everyone thinks oscar's crush is one sided or yn releases an album more adult rated than her previous ones

extra information: yn isnt directly taylors child its like a mother daughter relationship, shes friends with all big stars like sza, taylor, olivia rodrigo, conan gray, laufey, madison beer and etc

fc: sabrina carpenter

a/n GUYS PROMISE ME YOU WONT MAKE FUN OF THE LYRICS I COME UP WITH IM NOT A SONG WRITER 😭😭😭

ynln

liked by oscarpiastri, sza and 802,348 others date night w madisonbeer view comments

gracieabrams BBGS ➥ ynln BBG ➥ madisonbeer BBG madisonbeer im better than any man trust 🙏 liked by creator taylorswift pretty girls ➥ ynln literally you sza cuties conangray waiting for the soft launch i was promised ➥ user09 CONAN??? ➥ user45 WHAT SOFT LAUNCH ➥ user24 SPILL oliviarodrigo the last photo🥴 ➥ madisonbeer how u make us feel honeymoon whens the next album ➥ ynln SOONN ynloml oscar in the likes?? ➥ user05 not surprising tbh hes had a crush on her since she was on disney 😭

ynln

liked by oscarpiastri, taylorswift 890,382 others life lately (through his eyes) view comments

ynloml MOTHER IS THAT A MAN 🤮 ➥ ynln im afraid so child averageynlover NOT ANOTHER BADDIE OFF THE MARKET conangray is this the soft launch i was promised?? ➥ conangray ITS ONE PHOTO OUT OF 9 ➥ ynln AND A CAPTION CONAN oliviarodrigo leave himmm ➥ ynln i would but he takes such cute photos alexanderasaintmleux pretty girl ➥ ynln 🪞🪞 lilymhe cutie ➥ ynln says u no1f1lover why are there so many wags in the comments ➥ user09 WHAT IF SHES DATING SOMEONE ON THE GRID ➥ user49 this is the delulu i aspire to be ➥ user56 or maybe just maybe its a bunch of girls supporting another girl landonorris ew ➥ ynln r u talking abt ur face carmenmundt come over for dinner one day ➥ ynln will do 😁 op81 maybe oscar will finally stop going after her

oscarpiastri

liked by ynln, landonorris and 403,692 others life lately view comments

landonorris WOAH georgerussell JUMPSCARE ➥ landonorris IK OSCAR'S SO SCARY ➥ georgerussell yep i definitely meant oscar alexalbon THERES CHILDREN HERE ➥ oscarpiastri is one of them you logansargeant ew oliverbearman stop being horny on main ➥ arthurleclerc fr lilymhe shes so cuteee op81 OSCAR SOFT LAUNCHING WHAT rbrmylove WHY IS THE YN LN IN THE LIKES ➥ user09 idk bro but somethings up user67 what jeans are those user59 WHY ISNT ANYONE TALKING ABOUT THE PICTURES 😭 ➥ user48 BECAUSE OSCAR 'NO RIZZ' PIASTRI SOFT LAUNCHED ➥ oscarpiastri i have rizz 😕

ynln

liked by honeymoon, oscarpiastri and 2,392,481 others surprise!! my sixth studio album comes out on 6th april !! i want to give a special thanks to my friends and my forever muse; i love you baby view comments

user09 OOMF WAS RIGHT??? oliviarodrigo YAYYYY conangray YIPEEE alexanderasaintmleux im so excited lilymhe cant wait landonorris 34+35 = 69 ?? ➥ landonorris OH ➥ user09 LANDO HELP danielricciardo ❤️ ➥ user49 what taylorswift i cant believe it's your sixth album already 💗 traviskelce new favourite album?? gracieabram SKSKSKS sza cutie tyla im so proud of you beyonce 😍 laufey NO WAY carmenmundt !!!! kellypiquet cant wait 🫶 user95 why are there wags in the comment section ➥ user59 mayb cos theyre yn fans ?? ynloml SAY SIKE RN

ynln

liked by oscarpiastri, celinedion and 999,999 others following in taylorswift 's footsteps by being the man ! 💋 view comments

palomasandoval this was so fun! whitneypeak we ate user09 theres no way oscars gf is good with him liking popstar yn's pics ➥ user59 he mightve had a crush on her but hes still a fan taylorswift 🫶 ynloml U SAID U LIKE MY EYES AND U LIKE TO MAKE EM ROLL? conangray mv on repeat ! oliviarodrigo smash 😍 user08 THIS MV>>>> user56 I LOVE THIS ALBUM gracieabrams prettyy alexanderasaintmleux wow 😍 lilymhe private show plss kellypiquet wife me up pls carmenmundt ur actually so fine ynsno1fan MOTHERRR

a/n erm i found this in my drafts and i think i didnt post it cos of my cringe lyrics but oh well here it is guys

[soundlessdreamss]

Can I have a Lucifer vs Alastor fighting for the reader romantically, please if possible yanderes...

Lovely riddance

part two

pairings: y!alastor x reader & y!lucifer x reader

Note: reader will be a fallen angel for this! (Also this is prolly ooc)

You were a normal sinner (totally a sinner and not a fallen angel) living in hell you were in hell because of you questioning heaven which led to them throwing you down here… but you realized how different the other people in hell were compared to you. it just made you feel very weird, a total standout!

it made you miss heaven. A lot. Since you had made so many friends there and now you just lost it all. Well not all of it to be exact, your old friend Lucifer is the king of hell because he was the first one to rebel against heaven. You admired him for being so fearless against heaven themselves.

as you were in your own thoughts on the street of hell suddenly you passed by a poster that snapped you back to your senses. You suddenly scooted back to the poster and read it “want to be redeemed so you can live a gorgeous life in heaven? Well visit the hazbin hotel and let yourself be purified!” Oh my god. This could be your chance to meet other people like you! You decided to fly over there since the other angels didn’t rip off your wings when you fell down.

after like 69 minutes of flying (lol) you finally made it to the hotel! You couldn’t help but feel a bit anxious though, what would they think about you? Would they make fun of you? Would they humiliate you if you did one thing wrong- no you couldn’t let that stop you. This could be your chance to find your friends in heaven again. You knocked on the hotel door and waited for a response. It felt like it was taking forever until a blonde haired girl opened the door. (It only took 3 seconds for them to open the door but okay.)

she nearly screamed out of joy when she realized someone actually came to the hotel to be redeemed. She gave you a hug and welcomed you into the hotel where all the people there introduced themselves. There was Charlie, Vaggie, Angel dusk, Husk, Nifty, (nifty is a cutie) and a snake who you didn’t bother remembering his name cause it was too long. (Totally not an excuse to not have to write his name)

you almost choked though when Charlie said her last name was Morningstar, like Morningstar as in Lucifer Morningstar? She was his daughter?! You had no idea him and Lilith had a child but you felt happy for them. Not until she told you her mom left her 7 years ago. (Lol)

To your surprise (and relief) they accepted you and treated you nicely. And you recognized Vaggie but didn’t out her because you had a feeling that she didn’t want that to happen and you respected her.

All of a sudden a man just teleported out of the floor and tapped you on your back which made you scream so loud. He chuckled and said not to worry as it was him, the radio demon! And he also introduced himself as Alastor. He grabbed your hand and kissed it which made you a bit confused but you rolled with it. Over the couple of days you had spent there you bonded really well with all of them, but alastor specifically wanted to spend a lot of time with you.

he often invited you to brunch, dinner, and to help him work on the hotel. Had you caught his eye? Maybe… maybe you had caught his eye more than you thought you did. (He also may or may not be planning to make a deal for your soul.)

timeskip to when Charlie invited her dad over. ——————————————————————————————————————

you had all prepared for the place to look nice since the king of hell was coming to visit! Aka Charlie’s dad, and you wanted to make a good impression on him after you haven’t seen eachother for such a long time. He seemed happy that his daughter was inviting him over based on the tone of his voice when Charlie called.

You guys all got in position and Charlie was about to open the door until Lucifer barged in and greeted his daughter with a bear hug! He looked around the place awkwardly after and Charlie introduced him to everyone in the hotel. He stared at you for a couple of seconds not knowing if it was really you. He was about to speak to you until alastor teleported right next to you.

Alastor put his hand on your shoulder and had a death grip on it. Like he didn’t want Lucifer to even be near you. They both introduced themselves to each other and as they were talking about the hotel ideas, Alastor pointed out a thing you did for the hotel which helped them a lot. He brought your face to his as he put his hand around your neck pulling you closer. Your face was squished with his. He only did this though to simply piss Lucifer off and trick him into thinking that he had got to you first and that you guys have a deep connection.

as you pulled yourself away from him and looked at the two it suddenly felt as if there was an intense aura in the room all of a sudden. You laughed nervously and tried to excuse yourself before Lucifer grabbed your hand.

he was nervous and tried to compose himself to talk to you as it had been so long since you two had talked. Wtf was he even suppose to say? He decided to finally speak after an agonizing 5 seconds.

Lucifer: “oh [reader]… it’s been so long since we’ve last seen eachother! How have you been doll?”

[reader] : “oh I’ve been just fine. Well despite the fact that heaven kicked me out, it feels better here. Like I can actually breathe in this place.”

Lucifer: “good to hear. Would you mind visiting my palace sometime? Id like to show you some of my latest creations, especially one I made just for you!”

his smile became wider and his eyes seemed more sincere like he really wanted you to visit. I mean after all you guys haven’t seen eachother in eons!

before you could reply to his offer, Alastor grabbed your other hand and yanked you away as he chuckled.

Alastor: “I’m sure they would love to visit you sometime, but they’re busy with me today as I invited her to dinner and they accepted. Didn’t you dear?”

you suddenly remembered that you and Alastor were gonna go out for dinner tonight and you nodded your head.

[reader] : oh that’s actually right! I totally forgot about that for a minute. Well Lucifer would you like me to visit anytime I’m free if that’s okay?

Lucifer: oh, that’s just fine! Just try to make it soon cause I can not wait to spend time with you again!

his smile faded a bit and he seemed to give a glare to Alastor. In response Alastor simply had a wide smile as he continued to hold your hand after yanking away Lucifer’s.

After the argument with Lucifer and Alastor over Charlie was done.

───────────────────────

Finally everyone calmed down after they argued over who Charlie preferred as a dad. Thank god Mimzy barged through the door before another fight broke loose. After a couple minutes Alastor decided to tell everyone you and him would be leaving for dinner about now, you thought it was later but alright!

as you guys left through the door to go to your favorite restaurant, Alastor couldn’t help but giggle feeling Lucifer’s eyes burning a hole through him. He knew it pissed him off and he was glad that it did. And little did you or Lucifer know the Alastor was making more and more progress to his plan. His plan was to woo you enough so that you’d made a deal with him for your soul.

of course you’d get benefits aswell! Alastor would be at your every beck and call and you would do the same for him. It would just be a matter of time before he proposed the idea to you. He just hopes a certain someone wouldn’t mess it up.

part two coming soon…

note: hiii to everyone who read this, I’d like to thank you all for all the likes on my previous two posts! I’m going to be working on part two sooner or later. Also sorry is this is a bit ooc, I’m new to writing fanfics and tried to make alastor manipulative like he is in the show. :)

[sneakyfriday]

Slow morning 🌅

Maybe this is exactly how you want to wake up every morning from now on.

Rafayel x You. Loosely based on how i imagine this Illusio went.

Your senses returned as you pulled yourself up from a peaceful slumber. Gentle sunlight permeated the hotel room, leaving behind no sign of the raging thunderstorm last night. You took a deep breath of the salty ocean breeze and basked in the jolly morning calls of seagulls. A new day has begun, but you were not in a hurry to start it. There was no work, no plan, no commitment. You could stay in bed the whole day if you wanted to. And you wanted to, especially with the comforting warmth that was radiating from behind.

If only you could carve out this moment and keep it in a bottle, preserving its rare tranquility. For the first time, you did not remember the stormy night as endless nightmares and loneliness. Instead, you blushed at the memory of the intimate night you two shared under the roaring sky.

His hand faintly caressed your ears before moving downwards to twirl and play around with your hair. Eyes closed, you tried to feel the steady heartbeat through his gentle touches. His long, slender fingers have given up on playing with your hair to slowly traced the outline of your shoulder instead. His touches were ghostly, and yet, you could feel how deep his adoration for you was — it was reverence almost. Rafayel drew incomprehensible patterns on your back with his fingertips, as if writing a spell, to bound you to him and this moment forever. He must have gotten magic power, because it was working. All you could do was lean more into his touch, wishing for it to never end, for the world to stop spinning and for him to take you to a place with only the two of you.

“When is my cutie finally going to stop pretending to sleep and say good morning to me?”

You hitched. His lips were now dangerously close to the nape of your neck as hot breaths tickled your skin.

“Rafayel” — you whined. “Why are you even awake this early? And don’t be so close to me!”Hiding your embarrassment, you turned around to face him.

Apparently, this sly fishie had woken up way earlier than you thought, since he already showered and was lying in bed with nothing but a towel loosely wrapped across his hip. You blushed. Damn it, you had seen it all last night, why act timid now?

“You were both clinging to me and kicking me the whole night! You called my name and even hissed a little sometimes, it was scary. How can I sleep peacefully if little miss here is giving me such mixed signals. I’m not sure if she was having a nightmare or just missing me in her dream!”

He teased, eyes twinkling with a gentle smile. You matched his gaze, like a masterful painting of the morning dawn, pink hues warming up the night, carrying a mellow yet mysteriously dazzling light to the illuminate the darkness. Gosh you want to stay in those eyes. When your reflection was so clear in those eyes. When your reflection was the only thing in those eyes.

“Miss bodyguard, you are staring and not talking to me. Don’t tell me you think this is a dream too?” His tone was ever playful, and his hands ever loving. Rafayel cupped your dazed expressions, thumbs gently wiping across your lips.

“Hmmm? Maybe this is still a dream. Guess I will have to find a way to wake myself up..”

It was your turn to get this man flustered as your hand slowly glided down his smooth torso and rested on his chiseled abs.

Maybe this is exactly how you want to wake up every morning from now on.

⏰

The ringing alarm interrupted entwined bodies on the bed. Rafayel quickly lifted himself up to turn it off before crashing his lips back to yours again.

Self note: Again Illusio please come back.

[cherrikeys]

rafayel drabble — first "i love you"

˚꩜˖°⋆🐚‧₊˚ ⋅🌊｡𖦹°‧

A lazy day at the beach was not all uncommon with Rafayel. They'd become more frequent lately, even, the longer the two of you spent your days together. At first there would be a plan— an incentive, always, behind Rafayel's invitations. I got two tickets to this event, or I need a fresh perspective on this painting, always something to demand your presence.

In the beginning, it was as if he felt he needed to lure you to come see him. You were grateful for the excuse, at least.

The soft peach streaks of the sky have long since faded into the dark blanket of the night surrounding you now.

"We've come a long way," you speak into the night. The blanket beneath you is cushioned by the sand, and your gaze stays lazily fixed onto the stars above. Rafayel is in your periphery, sitting up still, looking at the sea and you and not even bothering with the stars. His head turns your way now.

"A long way from what?" He asks, voice softer than usual. Maybe he doesn't want to speak over the crashing of the waves. "We're not that far from my house, cutie."

"A long way from you making up reasons for me to come hang out." You smile, gaze finally breaking away from the stars. "Now you can just demand I come see you, to spend my whole day doing nothing at the beach."

Rafayel gasps with flair. His pout kicks in immediately. "Hey now, it's not hanging out when we're dating. They're dates! Romantic dates!"

"Is this a romantic date?" You ask, trying hard to keep your smile from spreading too wide. You gesture around the empty beach with a lazy wave. "We've been here forever, Rafayel, I'm hungry and cold."

Now it's your turn to pout, so you gaze up at Rafayel with the most pathetic look you can muster.

"I— You—" Rafayel crosses his arms, sniffing slightly. "I give you a relaxing break for a whole day, and you just sit here and complain. That's so..."

He trails off, eyes narrowing at your arm. His hand darts out to grab at your wrist, lifting it straight up to the front of his eyes.

"What? You are cold. You have goosebumps! You should've told me earlier," Rafayel pouts. "Here, let me help."

He takes your hand in between his palms, and brings it up to his lips, breathing hot air onto your hand. The proximity, his direct stare, the heat of his breath directly on your skin— something there makes your stomach roll over, and you look away, towards the darkness.

"Hey now, don't look away."

The distribution of the sand beneath you shifts as Rafayel drops your wrist and moves closer. Arms appear on both sides of your head, caging you in, and your eyes drag over the shapes of his muscles before meeting his gaze above you.

The two of you stare at each other for a moment, before he brings his hand towards your face, gently cupping the side of your face, thumb brushing against your cheek. "Even your face is cold." He leans in now, gaze heavy. "Why didn't you tell me earlier?"

"Well..." You speak quietly. "You were having a good time, weren't you?"

Rafayel sighs, and you can feel it slightly, when he's this close— or maybe you're just imagining it, desperate for more of him.

"I would have a good time with you anywhere. We could've gone back home hours ago, y'know." His thumb strokes against your cheek, back and forth.

You can't help the slight curl of your lips. "Yeah? You're saying if I had just jumped up and demanded to leave, you would've just gone? No complaints, nothing?"

Rafayel hums. "I don't know about nothing, but of course I would've left."

He continues, his thumb poking your cheek. "Of course I'd follow you— I love you."

You freeze, heart beating hard. Like a drum, or thunder. Your lips open to reply. You forget what to say. You forget how to speak. He hasn't said that before. You haven't, either. Not out loud. You didn't expect him to say it so easily.

He watches you with gentle patience. Until you can swallow and try to talk again. You can't help but ask, "You do?"

Rafayel's head tilts slightly, lips quirked. "Yeah. Wasn't it obvious?"

The waves crash against the shore right alongside your next inhale. In, and out. The light shines only slightly against the features of his face. A sudden raw affection envelops you. You reach up to smooth out the front of his shirt.

"I guess so." You finally say, soft.

Rafayel pinches your cheek, then, his brows furrowing. The small sting makes you jolt. "What, are you just gonna leave me hanging now? Don't you know you're supposed to say it back?"

You grin— "Do I have to? Isn't it obvious?"

Rafayel groans, head dropping to the curve of your neck, yet still careful not to drop all of his weight on you. You can't help the laugh that bubbles up and out of you.

Laughing still, you trail your hand around to the nape of his neck, scratching gently. "I love you too, Rafayel. Obviously."

He starts to laugh too, directly against your skin, burrowing his own head even closer, until his response is muffled. "Obviously?"

You smile, warm and happy. "Obviously."

[shuaasumii]

“I Wish For Forever With You”

ᯓ pairing: seungkwan x reader

ᯓ genre: SO MUCH FLUFF

ᯓ warnings: none!

ᯓ tags: idol!seungkwan, lowkey kinda cheesy towards the end

ᯓ summary: after waiting a whole day to see your boyfriend, he finally comes home so you can wish him a happy birthday.

ᯓ a/n: the pictures of kwan above are from pinterest. happy birthday to my fav cutie! 🍊

you crouched below your kitchen counter, waiting for seungkwan to get home. it was his birthday, but you haven’t seen him a single time today. well except for when he kissed you goodbye, but technically that doesn’t count cause you were half asleep. but you wanted to surprise him for when he came home anyways. since he was coming back from a day of promotion for BSS, you had prepared a nice warm bath and his favorite type of cake to end the night peacefully.

“darling?” he called out, still pulling off his shoes. your boyfriend, wondering why the apartment was so quiet, wandered into the kitchen in search of you.

“SURPRISE!” you jumped out from behind the counter, extending your arms to make seungkwan aware of your presence.

seungkwan jumped at your sudden appearance, “HOLY SHIT“ he held a hand over his chest. “don’t do that baby.”

you giggled at him as you made your way over to where he stood. without hesitation seungkwan returned the warm hug you embraced him in, hand on your waist pulling you closer.

“happy birthday kwannie,” you pulled away from the hug to look up at him.

seungkwan smiled down at you, “thank you babe,” he said placing a gentle kiss on your lips.

“i set up a nice bath for you in the bathroom. why don’t you wash up so that we can blow out your cake after?”

seungkwan, clearly amused by the sound of a relaxing bath, quickly rushed to your shared bathroom. as he was calming down from the day in the tub, you got his birthday cake from the fridge. it was a white cake with little designs of seungkwan’s favorite: tangerines. hearing the water drain from the tub, you quickly gathered the seven candles you bought for the 27 years seungkwan has been alive.

“thank you for the ba-“ he was cut off by your singing of happy birthday. you made your way over to him, holding the cake with a cheesy smile on your face.

“make a wish,” you whispered, locking eyes with your boyfriend.

after blowing out his candles, seungkwan grabbed the cake from your hands, placing it on the counter before pulling you in for a kiss.

“i know i shouldn’t say, but i wished for forever with you,” he grinned.

“seungkwaann,” you whined. “now it’s not gonna come true.”

“oh trust me baby, it will.” he winked.

[dumbseee]

bro code. pt.2

part two of this

part 3.

carlos sainz jr x reader.

fc: bruna marquezine.

note: thanks for the support it means so much to me! and english is still not my first language so this may contain mistakes krkrkr

liked by bellahadid, georginagio, carlossainz55 and 1 889 009 others.

y/n: your girl is single and ready to mingle.

_

fan1: girl what about carlos?

georginagio: stunning!

fan2: who was the man in your ig story?

fan3: omg the girl just got out of a seven years old relationship, LEAVE HER ALONE!!

fan4: y/n is her own person, she don’t need a man

liked by y/n.

carlossainz55: que guapa!

liked by y/n.

"so you asked him to be your fake boyfriend?" bella asked, trying her best not to laugh at your face. you rolled your eyes and threw a pillow at her. "yes, i did. and he was okay with it." you answered but added something else when you saw the look she was giving you. "okay, maybe i had to convince him a little bit and bribe him with a movie date but he said yes!" bella laughed. "he’s so in love with you, of course he said yes." you frowned. "no he’s not. i’ve known carlos forever, we’re just friends." you said, trying to convince your friend but she already stopped listening to you.

you met carlos through neymar, they weren’t close friends, only acquaintances, but you immediately clicked with the spaniard. he was funny, trustworthy, kind and charming. you liked him a lot, but only as a friend, right? you thought that this fake dating stunt would help you a lot because neymar didn’t know how to take no as an answer and kept harassing you. you explained the situation to carlos and he immediately said yes, kinda pissed off at your ex’s behaviour after what he put you through. the plan was simple, soft launch the relationship since the fans were already shipping the both of you, go on a few public dates and do this for a few months, so neymar would finally leave you alone.

simple right? well…

y/n just posted a story!

caption: guess who ☺️

liked by y/n, charles_leclerc, landonorris and 969 000 others.

carlossainz55: this account is going to be a y/n fanpage starting from now.

_

y/n: carlos clearly lied when i asked him if he knew what soft launch was BUT you’re cute so i’m not mad, amor

fan1: NZKDODODJZBDODPDPFPMF

fan2: MAMA Y PAPA

fan3: SMOOOTH OPERAAAATOOOOR

fan4: i know neymar is fuming rn

fan5: omgg congrats

fan6: carlos is such a cutie omg

"what’s wrong, mi cielo?" carlos asked you, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. you were lost in your thoughts so you shivered at his touch. you smiled at him, "it’s nothing, just tired."

you were both sitting in carlos’s car, after having dinner together in some fancy restaurant carlos wanted to take you to. neymar was constantly calling you and sending you text messages, which you ignored but it was slowly taking a toll on you. he destroyed everything you both built in seven years, he destroyed your hopes for marriage and love, he basically destroyed you. and he still had the nerves to cling onto you like he was the victim.

"amor, you look pale, you sure you okay?" carlos asked again and you just looked at him while he stroked your cheek softly, you leaned against his touch and closed your eyes. "your hands are soft." you mumbled, slowly falling asleep. you heard him chuckle and remove his hand which made you complain. "kiss me." you immediately opened your eyes and looked at him. but when you noticed some paparazzis in the corner of your eye, you remembered that all of this was fake. he was being affectionate because cameras were filming you. you didn’t know why but you were nervous to kiss carlos. you’ve never been that close and he looked so… confident all the time. you were scared to mess it up. it’s fake, it’s all fake, don’t forget that.

carlos pulled you closer to him, and slowly kissed your lips, your cheeks were burning hot and you didn’t know what to do next. suddenly you were back in high school when you had your first kiss with your crush. after a few seconds, the two of you broke the kiss but stayed close to each other. eye to eye, carlos smiled at you and looked at your lips once again. "kiss me again." he said, in a murmur. "what? but they-" carlos cut you. "shut up and fucking kiss me."

the second kiss was more passionate, you never felt anything like it in your whole life. no one had ever kissed you the way carlos had. your hands were sweaty and you could feel a million of butterflies blooming in your stomach. that’s when you realised; you were doomed.

liked by f1lover, smoothoperator55, ferraribaby and 58 007 others.

f1news: BREAKING! We just received pictures of Carlos Sainz Jr and Y/N L/N kissing in the spaniard’s car. What a cute couple!

_

fan1: ODBDLOWLWPDPD

fan2: what in the booktok is that

fan3: the hand placements…

fan4: idk if i want to be y/n or carlos tbh

fan5: my fav couple

fan6: pls don’t ever breakup

fan7: NEYMAR DEACTIVATED HIS IG???

_

tag list: @ru-kru @slytherheign @iamahallucinationnn @leclerc16s

[tsumtsumrry]

Favorite Holiday

this follows harry and a cutie (you) through some of your favorite holidays as you guys navigate a little fun friends with benefits/situationship stitch. i feel like this took forever so sorry for my near disappearance but i hope you enjoy!! <3

**disclaimer** i'm american so i have the dates (e.g. 11/24/23) month/day/year format. just to avoid any confusion!! <3

WC: 12k.

warning(s): afab descriptions and she/her pronouns, language, multiple instances of smut (fingering, phone sex, f receiving oral use of a vibrator, unprotected don't do it p in v), barely proofread cause i was too excited to finally post it, and a bit of angst.

March 20th, First day of Spring.

The holidays were always your favorite time of year. Every single one for that matter. Every holiday has its own special place in your heart. New Years, Easter, Christmas, etc. You loved them all the same. But you looked forward to them even more so this year. Because this year you had Harry. 

Harry, who was sitting across from you right now, laughing as he animatedly tells one of his horrible but adorable jokes. You have the stupidest grin on your face, with your eyes set on how his lips form the words coming out of his mouth. You can’t seem to look away. It doesn’t help that he keeps sneaking glances at you, those suggestive eyes that only you know burning into your face. 

He plans to take you home tonight, you can tell. You two have been going at this for months, the no-strings-attached sex thing. You think it’s easy enough. There’s never been any real difficulties, just the fact that you’re trying to keep it discreet. 

The first kiss was at the New Years party. You were both tipsy, he confessed that he always had a little fixation on you and how you looked in “all those pretty outfits you like to wear” and you confessed that him and his “fancy british accent”, “pretty tattoos”, and “ridiculously charming personality” never failed to have you imagining kissing those incredibly soft looking lips. 

He looked at you for a second, his gaze moving from your lips to your eyes as if he was trying to gauge where your head was at. Then, at the perfect timing, the clock turned twelve and your lips were intertwined. The rest is history. 

Your phone buzzes in your pocket and you bite your lip, fighting hard to hide the smile that threatens to overtake your face. You know exactly who it is. 

You pull your phone out and smirk when you read it. 

H 11:34PM

Need you tonight, baby.

It’s been too long since he’s touched you, you missed it so much and he couldn’t go another day without you. You look around a little, trying to make sure no one is looking at your phone (only making yourself look more suspicious in the process) and then begin typing back. 

You 11:36PM

And what do you suppose I do about that?

You look up at him when you know he’s seen the message. You smirk at him and he gives you a look that says ‘you know damn well’ but he texts back anyways. 

H 11:37PM

Come to mine tonight. Let me fuck you.

As soon as you read the text your stomach erupts with butterflies, you always have an instant reaction to his words. You press your thighs together and try your best not to squirm. 

He doesn’t need to know that though, so you answer with a simple, 

You 11:40 PM

Ok.

You push your phone right back into your pocket and try your best to continue with the conversation that’s getting passed around the table. But thoughts of him keep creeping in. Thoughts of his voice in your ear, the feeling of him inside of you, stretching you and filling you, his hands gripping you roughly or gently, depending on how you feel, all you can think about is him. 

“It’s getting late, you guys. I’m exhausted. Loved seeing you all.” you finally say, not being able to take much more of wanting something when it’s literally right in front of you and not being able to just take it. 

“Me too. Got an early morning. See you.” Harry says after you, looking at you not-so-discreetly as he gets his stuff. 

When you’re both outside he instantly pulls you away from the windows and kisses you. It’s hard and passionate and needy and it’s almost like he―

“Missed you.” he says in between kisses, his hands going to grip your waist tightly, like he’s yearning for the skin to skin contact. 

“Yeah?” you whisper, tugging on his bottom lip which earns you a pained groan. 

“Fuck. Mhm. Missed you so much. You smell good.” 

You giggle at his admission about your scent and decide to spur him on even more. 

“Show me. Take me home, H.” 

Waking up next to Harry is something you simultaneously love and wish you never got to experience. Because when this little arrangement is over, you know you’ll miss it too much. 

When he wakes up, he doesn’t treat you like his fuck buddy, he treats you like some sort of girlfriend. And you haven’t let it detrimentally affect you yet, but you know it will. And the day it does is when you’ll know you need to end this. End it before someone, scratch that, you get hurt. 

“Mornin’, angel. Want some breakfast?” he says, his voice gravelly but also smooth like toffee and it sounds weird but you want to taste it. 

“Mhm. Whad’ya making?” you mumble, eyeing his lips. 

“Whatever you want. Kiss?” 

You smile and lean up to kiss him, taken by surprise when he deepens it and pulls you over his lap. You giggle into the kiss and he smiles with a short chuckle. 

“Want anything before I go make it?” he says, obviously trying to start something. 

“Harry…” 

“Just asking, sweetheart. You know I always want you.” he says with a kiss to your collarbone, “only you” he says softly as if it wasn’t meant to be heard.

“Stop trying to sweet talk me. Go make breakfast.” You push yourself off him and he whines, but obliges, going to make that lovely french toast he knows you want.

You sit up to look through some emails when you hear it, his phone buzzing incessantly on his counter. 

You know it shouldn’t bother you, you’re just friends who happen to enjoy each other's sexual company. The idea of him having someone else that he whispers sweet nothing to in his ear just doesn't feel right to you. 

You pick up the phone, keeping it face down, (not wanting to see something you know you don’t want to) and walk to the kitchen where Harry is mixing some yummy smelling batter. 

“Think someone is trying to reach you.” you try to come off as cool and collected, and you almost convince yourself that you are, but you know you’re not. You curse your sensitivity and watch as he picks up the phone but puts it back down, face down, just as quickly. 

“Makin’ your favorite.” He rasps out, turning around to smirk at you. He frowns when your expression isn’t one of your usual excitement. 

“You okay, baby?” he inquires, setting the bowl of batter down on the counter and walking over to you. He takes your hands in his and playfully looks into your eyes with faux intensity, “tell me.” 

“I’m okay, yeah. Just tired.” It’s only now that you actually wonder how many times you’ve told that lie. 

“Worked you over good last night, hmm?” He smirks and you roll your eyes and smile despite yourself, “you sounded like you were having a good time.” he adds cheekily and before you can stop it a giggle breaks from your lips. 

“I was.” His ability to make you feel like everything is okay with just a cheeky smile and a couple of words breaks you and mends you at the same time. 

“Good girl.” he whispers against your lips, kissing you slowly and softly. 

“Back to the food!” he exclaims, breaking away from you to saunter back over to the counter-top. 

“Wanna be my sous chef?” 

April 1st, April fools.

You never understood the fixation with men’s hands until you started sleeping with Harry. 

“Fuck.” he drags out the vowel sound as he thrusts his fingers in and out of you, stroking your g-spot in a way you can only describe as affectionately rough, “look at you princess, taking my fingers so fucking well.” 

“H..fuck I—” you’re cut off by your own loud moan, praying that no one can hear you two. Your friend group planned a little get together given the fact that it’s april fools and you guys have nothing better to do. You all decided to host it at Harry’s place and he lasted about ten minutes trying to be a good host before he dragged you into the bathroom with a phony excuse that you’re almost sure nobody believed. 

When you reach up to cover your mouth, he tuts softly and reaches up to tap three fingers against your hand, signaling he wants it off, “s’my fucking house we can be as loud as we want. You know how much I love your pretty sounds, why’re you trying to keep ‘em from me, huh? Being bad?” he says in that condescending tone that you simultaneously love and hate.

“N-no, please H. M’not being bad jus-just please.” 

“Love it when you beg. Soaking me like this and I’ve only given you two fuckin’ fingers–” 

“Gonna cum.” you interrupt him with your frantic moan, he’s always very adamant about you asking for permission. He needs to be in control like that. He needs to have that control over your body and your pleasure. He thrives on it. “Can I please, please cum?” 

“Fuck. You’re sqeezin’ me so fucking tight. Gonna make a mess all over my fingers, baby? Give it to me.” 

“Yes, yes yes” you feel that white hot pleasure building in what feels like every nerve in your body and your muscles start to jerk as you cope with all the pleasure overriding your system. You ramble out a couple praises mixed in with Harry’s name and your hand tangles in his hair which he groans at. You pray to every god that you can think of that nobody downstairs can hear the way he’s ruining you. 

“There you go, baby.” he doesn’t stop with his fingers, keeping a rhythm that only intensifies your release. When you choke on a moan that sounds more like a sob, he kisses your temple gently and soothes you with his voice, “I know, I know. Feels too good, doesn’t it?” 

You’re not sure if he expects a response, but even if he did you’re not in any state to give one. His fingers have turned your brain into a mushy mess.

“You’re okay darling. Always making me so proud.” He whispers as you come down, slowly pulsing his fingers inside you still to help you ride it out. 

“Jesus christ.” you sigh and he chuckles softly. 

“What was our excuse again?” he asks before leaning down to your lips to kiss you, his kiss full of the lust that’s swimming in his forest eyes. 

“Dunno, something about getting the movies that we were gonna watch,” you giggle softly against his lips and he smiles. 

You get some movies from his bedroom so that you don’t seem too suspicious and go back downstairs to your friends. The heat of embarrassment makes itself known every time someone asks you or Harry what took so long or what distracted you up there. 

“What could you guys possibly have been doing for eight whole minutes?” a friend of yours asks incredulously with a joking tone. 

“We couldn’t find the movie we wanted. Duh.” Harry shoots back with a quickness, smirking softly when he looks over to you. And he can read your body like a book. He knows you’re a little embarrassed at the idea of people finding out that you guys have been fooling around. 

You’re playing with the lobe of your ear as everyone takes in Harry’s response and laughs. Someone tells another joke that just amplifies the laughter but Harry’s only looking at you. Playing with the lobe of your ear is one of your many obvious tells with your anxiety. He makes  a mental note to check on you later. 

During the movie he plops himself right in between you and one of your friends, making both of you giggle. He swings his arm around your shoulder and leans down to whisper in your ear. The heat and tickle of his whisper sends a shiver down your spine and you know that the position you guys are in is less than discreet but you can’t really find it in yourself to care when he’s close like this. “You okay?” he asks in an earnest tone, his hand gently squeezing your shoulder for good measure. You nod softly and he smiles, softly tugging you closer. 

April 9th, Easter.

Easter was always a fun holiday, especially for your god children, you always loved to see the little kids run around in search of the little painted eggs. It reminded you of a time when you were in their position, blissful and young. You often refer to those as the ‘good old days’, but you can’t quite complain about how you ended up.

You’re talking to your sister’s baby boy when your phone rings, you pull it out to see a picture of Harry sleeping in bed and you smile, you remember when you took that picture. 

“Hello?” 

“Hi, pretty. Where are you?” he sounds kind of breathless, like he’s been running a mile.

“At an Easter egg hunt. You?”

He chuckles darkly before speaking. “Dunno. Just missin’ you.” he says. You squint your eyes in suspicion.

“Missing me?” you say with the same suspicion laced in your voice. You’re starting to understand what he’s playing at. 

“Missing your sweet cunt. God, the way you taste. Need you on my tongue.” he spews out in what seems like one breath. 

“Jesus Christ, Harry. What has gotten into you?” you hiss, quickly getting up out of your seat and away from prying eyes and ears. 

“God, I can almost imagine it.” you hear his whisper and the neediness radiating off of his voice makes you press your thighs together. He’s touching himself. He’s fucking his hand to the thought of your taste and it’s driving you mad. “Want you to sit on my face next time, have your thighs shaking around my head, your pussy drenchin’ me―fuck!” he whimpers. 

“Harry…” you say, it’s supposed to be some type of warning but the arousal starting to pool in your underwear has your voice coming out shaky and unstable. 

“Love it when you say my name like that. Again. Say it again, please baby.” he begs, shamelessly. You can tell he’s close, the strain in his voice, the crackly over-the-phone sound of the wetness of his strokes.

“Harry I―”

“Fuck fuck fuck, I fuckin’ need you. Please, please.” he keeps whispering the word “please” under his breath, gasping out moans and whines, “gonna cum, gonna cum.” 

You decide there's no harm in spurring him on a bit, “come for me, Harry.” 

You hear a broken “fuck” before a series of his beautiful sounds fill your ears. You squeeze your eyes shut at the onslaught of stimulation, butterflies swarming around in your tummy. 

“Fuck.” 

“Yeah fuck.” you whisper and you hear his laugh on the other end. 

“Sorry―Sorry I um― called you like that. I just, fuck, really needed you. Was so fuckin’ hard. Y’have no idea.” he breathes out. 

“I…um. I missed you too.” you don’t know why you cringed at yourself after saying it, but it’s almost like Harry can read your mind because he chuckles and speaks in a reassuring tone, “that’s the cutest thing I’ve ever heard. When will I see you again missy?” 

“Dunno. I’ve been a little busy with work and…stuff. I’ll have my people call your people to see when I can fit you into my schedule.” you joke, biting your lip softly and toying with your necklace as you wait for his response. 

When you hear a soft laugh a smile is immediately brought to your face. That laugh could melt you. His voice is like velvet when he speaks, “I’ll have you soon. We both know you can’t stay away. You need me for my slutty waist and washboard abs as you usually say.” 

You try your best to hold in your laugh so as to not inflate his ego, but it slips out before you have permission and both of you are laughing before you feel a delicate tap on your leg. You’re met with your nephew when you turn around and look down to find the source of the touch. 

“Can we pway more bunnies?” your nephew says to you and you nod softly, “just give me one second honey.” He nods and walks back to the place you guys were sitting and you smile as you watch him. 

“I’ve gotta go but I’ll text you, alright?” 

“See you soon, petal.” 

May 31st, Memorial Day.

“That kiss the cook apron is really working for you, Harry I’ve got to say.” you giggle at your friend Jamal’s shout at Harry. 

It’s another one of your favorite holidays and you and your friends are all at the beach. The sun is beaming on your skin and warming you in the best way while the breeze balances it out, cooling you in the places needed. “Take it off! Take it off!” you join the chant, having trouble even speaking in between laughs. 

“You guys are fucking ridiculous” Harry chuckles. He smirks and reaches behind him to pretend to take the apron off, laughing when everybody’s cheers get louder. 

When the food is done and everyone is full, the girls lay on the sand while the guys are across from you guys making sandcastles like children. You look over at Harry and feel your stomach twist in a way that it’s been doing recently that you can’t stand. He just looks so good. You don’t know how else to explain it. Especially in this light, the warm sunset creating a golden glow against him. The soft amber tones kissed his skin and the sunshine he usually radiated with his personality seemed to radiate physically, as if he was being infused with the sun’s very essence.

You couldn’t stop yourself from sitting up to go and talk to him. He looked up at you in the position he was in on his knees and smiled, his eyes squinted from the direct sunlight.

“Hey. Fancy going for a walk?” the way he says it seems like he’s been waiting for the opportunity to do so. The sun shifts and his expression softens as he awaits your response. 

You nod and put your hand out for him to take it, and he rolls his eyes playfully but takes your hand anyway. You try not to think about what the rest of the group might think as you walk away with him, hand in hand. It’s not lost on you that you guys look like a couple, but Harry has always been touchy with his friends, some might say too touchy, so you pray that they’ll just attribute it to that. 

He swings your hands as you guys walk, and constantly rakes his fingers through his damp hair with his free hand. You kind of wish he wouldn’t because you love the way his curls fall over his face. 

“I feel like we’ve both been so busy. I haven’t gotten to see you as much as I want to.” You stop walking, you guys are a bit of a good distance away from everyone else and he’s starting to get more affectionate with you. His hands trail up to your arm to cradle your neck and he rubs your jaw affectionately. He leans down to ghost his lips against your neck and whispers, “I’ve missed you.” 

There’s something so poetic about the way his voice carries with the wind and the distant sound of the waves crashing around you guys. You melt into his hands when his lips finally make actual contact with your skin and you have to fight hard to suppress the whimper that threatens to leave your mouth. 

“Tell me you’ll come home with me tonight. Please.” He suckles on your neck gently, causing the moan you were suppressing to finally force its way out. 

“I will. Anything you want.” you pant out, tangling your hands into his hair. You sigh when he pulls away from you but you can’t complain when you get the view of the sun reflecting in his eyes. It feels like you’re frozen in time as you look at him. The sun has set a bit more and the atmosphere is colored a fiery orange that bleeds more into a red. His eyes mimic the water in the way they glisten and his pink lips almost make you weak just looking at them. Especially considering the way those lips were just all over you. 

Harry’s staring at you in awe, the way the deep colored rays dance against your skin made it seem like a thousand stars fell from the sky just to adorn you. You’ve always been beautiful, but in this very moment, you’re transcendent. To him it’s like you constantly exceed any expectation for beauty he could possibly have. Everything about you is like a masterpiece to him. He wonders why it took him so long to grasp just how weak the sight of you makes him. He gives you one soft kiss and then pulls back too quickly. He takes your hand and starts walking with you back to the rest of the group. 

Looking at him now, you wonder why it took you so long to grasp just how deep you are in this. Having thoughts of freezing time and staying in this moment so you can look at him forever are dangerous thoughts. Thoughts that almost make it seem like you’re in love. 

Dangerous. 

October 31st, Halloween.

“Jesus, babe.” Harry brings his finger up and moves it in a circular motion, “do a spin for me.” 

You giggle and spin around, making sure to do it slowly so he can really take in the way this dress hugs your figure in all the right ways. He whistles and you can’t stop the laugh from leaving your lips. 

Ever since your realization at the beach, things have been so simple between you two. You thought it would complicate things, but everything has been perfect. So incredibly perfect. It’s almost like he knew that you were starting to feel something more, the way he’s been treating you these past couple months is so different. Different in a good way. The amount of attention and care that he’s devoted to you makes your stomach with more butterflies than you can handle. 

“You don’t look too bad yourself,” you tell him, walking up closer to him, having to look up at him. Your confidence wanes the slightest bit at his intense eye contact when he looks down at you with an amused smirk on his face. 

“Yeah? I look good enough for you?” he quips, dangerously close to your lips as he speaks, “I was worried you know? S’hard to measure up to you.” 

Ever the flirt, he is. 

“You’re overdoing it now.” you deadpan and back away from him, making him throw his head back in a cackle. It was Harry’s idea to go to the Halloween party in matching costumes. You were a little shocked at first but you’d never turn down an opportunity to match with the most fashionable man you know. 

“Our ride is gonna be here in about….” he looks down at an imaginary watch on his wrist, “fifteen minutes. Whadya say we sneak a quickie in?” he smirks at you and chuckles when you roll your eyes.

“It’s this fucking outfit,” he practically growls, his hands palm at your ass, “driving me insane, baby.” 

“And whose idea was it?” you tilt your head as you speak, making a point to move his hands from your ass to your waist. “I’m not gonna be late because of you again, Harry. Keep your hands at appropriate places at all times.” you scold him. 

“Yes it was my idea,” he sighs. “A very good but painful idea that I take full credit fo—” a car beeping outside interrupts his sentence and his brow furrows while you smirk at him. 

Right…fifteen minutes.

Getting in the car and seeing all your friends dressed in all their Halloween outfits already has you excited for the rest of the night. Harry was very adamant about your seating arrangement when the car got too cramped, eagerly offering up his lap as a seat replacement for you. You of course took it, and you’ve spent the whole ride fighting your body’s natural reaction to his little teasing touches. 

You want to kill him by the time you finally arrive at the party. He knew exactly what he was doing in that car, he knows the effect his touches have on you and you know he’s doing this as “payback” for how you’re torturing him in your outfit. 

It’s not hard to make your rounds and do all the socializing that you’ve equipped yourself for before Harry is immediately stealing you away from people.

“Wanna dance with you.” is all he says, dragging you to the dancefloor. You look around as you guys settle, the vibe around is nothing short of raunchy. Looking at all of the other couples around you, you can tell that they all want to take each other home and tear each other’s clothes off. After cooling off with a couple drinks and conversations, you weren’t exactly in that mindset anymore, but you have a feeling that Harry is about to take you right back there. 

His hands smooth down your waist, boldly cupping your ass and he slowly grinds against him to the rhythm of the song, you feel his gentle breath before you hear his voice. “You’re killing me, petal. Been picturing tearing this dress off of you all. Fucking. Night.” 

Your breath catches in your throat and you let his hands lead you as you push your head further into his neck, “M’not doing anything though. What’s got you this worked up?” You pout at him condescendingly. He knows feigning innocence when he’s needy like this is your favorite thing to do. It makes you feel a sort of power that you usually don’t get with him to hear him say that you make him into a mess. 

“You fucking know, baby. You know what you’re doing to me.” he’s whining out his words at this point, and you thank god that the music is as loud as it is so everyone else can’t hear how this man is falling apart in your hands. 

“Can’t think of anything else. The only thought in my mind is watching you come on my cock. God it’d be so easy to just fuck you right here. Know you’ve already made a mess of yourself. It’d be so easy to give you what I know you need right now.” 

You’re panting at this point, delirious with pleasure. It should be illegal the way he can talk you into almost anything with that voice. You don’t care about anything or anyone else around you, all you can think about is how desperately you need him to quell that ache that’s building inside you.

“Fuck. Take me home. Take me home right now, H.” 

As soon as he hears you he’s moving. He doesn’t even bother to let your friends know where you’re going. He just drags you outside and starts tapping on his phone to get you guys an uber.

The ride to his house is tortuous. He sits you in his lap almost immediately and his hands find a home on your hips, making a point to drag you slowly back and forth across his thigh. 

Every roll against his thigh drives you further and further into oblivion and you don’t think you can wait any longer to get what you so desperately need. You suppose you’ll let him have his fun though, his little taste of “payback” for how bad he’s been aching this whole night. 

The second the driver stops, it’s like Harry couldn’t get you off of his lap fast enough (something you never thought you’d say) and he’s dragging you up to the house. He wanted to kiss you as soon as you got out of the car but he knew you wouldn’t appreciate doing that in front of the driver. No matter how turned on you are. 

As soon as you guys step into the house, he closes the door behind him and his lips are already on you. Your mind is instantly turned into mush with the way he claims your lips. It’s like he can’t even wait long enough to get you upstairs. He’s immediately getting down on his knees and kissing and sucking his way up your thighs, “so fucking beautiful and soft. You feel like a fucking dream. Dreamy girl.” 

He trails his hands slowly upwards and takes a hold of your thin lace panties. Although he pulls them down gently, you can see the impatience in his eyes and feel it in his grip. He’s beginning to lose his resolve and it’s the hottest thing you’ve ever seen. 

Your skirt is pushed up and resting on your hips before you can blink. The way you’ve been pressing your thighs together since you got in the house has been deemed useless when he forcefully pushes them apart, his hands gripping the flesh so hard you fear it might leave marks.  

“Wanna feel you come on my tongue. Missed it so much. Will you let me?” he sucks marks that only the two of you will be able to see in your inner thighs. You can barely find it in you to answer his question. Everything about the way he’s touching you, to his voice, to the smell of his cologne and your arousal mixed together is heightening all of your senses and making your brain short circuit. 

You nod hoping that would be enough, but you should’ve known better. “Words. You know better, baby.” he tsks, continuing his kisses along your sensitive skin. 

“Yes, yes. Please.” Is all you can manage to get out. The second the first yes leaves your lips, his mouth is exactly where you need it the most. He’s not wasting any time tonight, getting straight to the point of making you lose yourself on his tongue. Usually he drags it out, edges you or teases you with his tongue, but he’s aching so bad. He needs to be inside you before he loses his mind. 

His tongue swirls messily against your clit and you’re so sensitive that you tense with almost every stroke. He’s moaning against you in a way that you would find obnoxious if it wasn’t him, but because it is him, it just adds to your pleasure. He’s behaving as if he’s a man starved. As if he’s been a dessert and you’re that stream of water that he’s been yearning for. 

You tangle your hand into his hair and let your head tip back against the door. You can’t be bothered to worry about the volume of the moans you’re letting out and how they travel through the empty house. You’re too consumed in how good he’s making you feel. That’s the good thing about having a sexual partner like this. You’ve had so much time together and he’s made the most diligent effort to learn your body. He knows every signal, every tick, every indication. And he uses it all to his advantage. 

You sob lowly when he slides his fingers into your heat, immediately curling them up to hit that spot that makes you shake. You pull your head off of the door to look down at him, only to find his eyes already on you. His intense green eyes bore into yours and it’s almost as if they’re communicating with your eyes. He urges you to let go for him with that unspoken language that you’re now fluent in. 

He fucks you deep with his fingers while his tongue continues it’s very skillful ministrations. Every time he moans into your cunt the vibrations just push you further and further into bliss and you’re almost embarrassed with how close you are so quickly. The sounds you’re making are bordering on pornagraphic when you start clenching down hard on his fingers you know you’re a goner. 

He pulls away to egg you on with his voice, “there you go, baby. Getting so fucking tight for me.” you moan at his words and nod. As much as you love the way his tongue was working magic on you, the one thing that will always get you to fall over the edge is his voice. 

He’s evil, you decide. He’s evil for the way he toys with your body like he owns it. And at this point, he does own it. 

His tongue is back on your clit to offer you that final push off of the edge, he flicks his tongue and sucks with a pressure that you can only describe as mind numbing. Every movement he makes just makes the release that’s brewing even stronger. 

A complete mess of syllables leaves your bitten lips as the white hot pleasure consumes you. It feels like a tidal wave swallows you up in its strength and you see no way of coming up for air. You choke out a series of moans that Harry only groans at while he continues to softly lick at your clit and thrust his fingers inside you, like he intends to keep you under. 

The hands that were in his hair tug hard as the soft licks start to become a little too much for you to handle. A slightly higher pitched sound leaves him and he relents reluctantly, “can never get enough of your cunt, petal. Never.” He leaves wet kisses all over your thighs in between more praises that you barely register with all the pleasure swimming in your mind. 

One thing you can register though, is how bad you need him inside you, “take me upstairs, Harry.” 

He stands up almost immediately at that, and he smirks before leaning down to pick you up bridal style. You giggle at his antics and he only chuckles, kissing your cheek as he leads you two up the stairs.

November 23, Thanksgiving.  

Thanksgiving is by far your favorite holiday. The way you get to spend time with your family, the (amazing) food, just the atmosphere of being happy and thankful with people you love, you look forward to it every year. You’re chilling next to your sister on the couch at your parents house, laughing at one of your dad’s jokes. 

You guys have already eaten and you're completely full and sated as you enjoy the company of your family. 

The amount of times you’ve checked your phone should be considered embarrassing, but you can’t find it in yourself to stop. You invited Harry over for dinner. And it’s really no big deal, he’s been your friend for a while, long before the whole arrangement started. And he’s met your family so many times that they wouldn’t even bat an eye. His family lives in London and he’s in the U.S. for work so he’s come over for Thanksgiving plenty of times. 

You feel a nudge on your shoulder and you look over at your sister who has a soft knowing smirk on her face. 

Uh oh. You know that expression. 

You give her a deadpanned look, “what?” 

Her smile grows at the way you can read her so well and you urge her with your eyes to tell you what’s on her mind. 

“So…what’s going with you and Harry?” her eyes are squinted in that specific way that tells you that she knows exactly what’s going on with you and Harry, she just wants to hear you say it. “It’s just…you guys have been posting each other a lot, tagging each other in posts and all that. And the last time I saw you guys, you seemed super domestic.” 

You don’t doubt that. Even though you and Harry still place yourselves under the “friends with benefits” label, you guys have gotten way closer emotionally. You’re always together now. You sleep over at his house almost every night, sometimes without even sleeping together. You guys have been glued at the hip ever since Halloween. And it’s great, honestly. It feels great. 

“It’s nothing, it’s just…” you shrug your shoulders and a sheepish look graces your face, “I think I sort of…like him”

  Your sister can barely register what you said before your head is snapping to the sound of the doorbell ringing. You look back at your sister and she smirks at you softly with a soft raise of her eyebrow. 

Your mom gets up to open it and immediately shrieks in surprise, “Harry! I had no idea you were coming!” you smile at the genuine joy in her voice and then at Harry’s voice when he speaks, “she didn’t tell you I was coming?” You can hear the smile in his voice and it immediately brings the one you were trying to hide back on your face. 

“And you brought a date!” your mom exclaims. 

Your smile drops. 

Your heart follows your smile and you immediately feel a pit deep in your stomach that twists and twists until you can’t take it anymore. 

A hot wave of embarrassment comes next when your sister tenses next to you. You had just told her that you actually might like someone, that you actually might like Harry. And here he is with a date. 

Your mom steps aside to let them in and your stomach twists even tighter. She’s beautiful. And you’re sure she’s kind and charismatic and perfect and everything Harry would want and deserve in a woman. 

You don’t even wanna see the look on your sister’s face, you don’t want to see the pity in her eyes when she realizes that you’re completely hopeless. 

You feel tears gathering in your waterline and you blink them away. You almost want to feel angry. He brought her here? At your parents house? You know that technically you two don’t owe each other anything but there’s a level of respect that you figure one is supposed to have when sleeping with someone. 

You suddenly feel scared to see his face. You wonder if he’ll look guilty, or completely indifferent. You honestly don’t know which one is worse. 

You’re even more nervous that he’ll see your face and realize how much this is hurting you. How much it’s hurting you to realize that, although you two are friends, he never felt for you what you felt for him. That you were just a warm body he used when he needed it, and you happily offered it to him. Over and over. 

A plethora of emotions hit you at once, and after you cycle through confusion, sadness, and anger, you just feel stupid.

Your mom says your name and you’re very harshly snapped out of your thoughts, “figured you’d surprise us for the holiday, huh?” your mom has the most gentle smile on your face and it almost makes you crumble more. You look over to your mom and you immediately feel his intense gaze on you. That same intense gaze that used to make you melt only makes all of your muscles seize in the worst way at this very moment. You refuse to meet his eyes cause you know that if you do, you’ll break. 

You force a smile and pray that it’s not too obvious how you’re not even acknowledging him, “guess so, mom.” 

You and your sister share a look and you communicate without words that she’ll cover for you if you have to leave. She nods at you with a knowing look and you return the look, mentally preparing yourself to lie to everyone here and say you have to go. 

You pick your stuff up and get up to walk towards the door. “Harry,”  you address him for the first time since he came, “thank you so much for coming. I didn’t think you’d actually make it.” 

He furrows his brows and leans towards you, extending his arm out to pull you into an awkward side hug, “of course I’d make it.” you feel yourself tense as you feel his touch and you hope he doesn’t notice. You nod against his shoulder and sigh. His cologne envelopes your senses and you bask in the comfort of his warm hug. You’re utterly torn between the two feelings it offers you, a feeling of discomfort conflicting with a feeling of home. 

“How are you? You look lovely.” he kisses your cheek and the all too familiar feeling of his stubble rubbing against your skin threatens to bring a new wave of tears to your eyes. 

“I’m fine–” you barely get the words out before he’s interrupting you. A huge smile graces his face and he looks down at the girl he’s got his arm around, squeezing her shoulder gently before he speaks and you already know what he’s going to say. 

“I want you to meet—” 

You can’t do it. 

“I’d love to talk but I’ve got a work emergency and I really need to go.” you watch his face drop. His eyebrows furrow tightly together and a frown graces his face. You can tell he’s confused, he knows that you would never leave Thanksgiving early for any work emergency and you would never leave as soon as he shows up. 

You go to walk but his hand leaves his date like he’s been burned by her skin and he reaches out for you, grabbing your arm tight. His eyes are swimming with an expression you can’t quite place and he squeezes your arm with a quick pulse, “where’re you going? I just got here.” his voice dips and if you didn’t know any better you’d think he’s hurt by you leaving. Right now you can’t even begin to worry about him being hurt with the pain radiating in your chest right now. 

“S’work, H. I’m really sorry,” you turn to address the girl next to him, “it’s really nice to meet you. I’m sorry we couldn’t talk more.” and with that you’re out of there before anyone can say anything else. As soon as the door shuts behind you, you take a deep, shaky breath and bring your hand up to your neck to soothe the ache that’s developing in your jaw from holding in your tears. 

You decide then and there that you need to get it together. Harry doesn’t owe you anything, you guys are strictly friends with benefits. You weren’t supposed to get attached and caught up in the strings. You’ll try your absolute best to be a mature adult about this and not take your pain out on him cause as much as this hurts you, he doesn’t deserve to be treated the way you treat people when you’re hurt. 

And with that decision, you come to another. You need some time apart from Harry. 

December 24, Christmas Eve. 

Christmas Eve. Another one of your favorites. The anticipation and festive energy in the air felt palpable and everywhere you looked there was joy. The land outside was covered in white and the air felt crisp and cold. You loved the kind of air where it gave you little goosebumps as soon as you stepped outside. 

You’re watching a cheesy romantic Christmas movie, simultaneously loving and hating it. Loving it because it’s adorable and makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside, hating it because you definitely wish that the leads were you and Harry and it’s making you want to die. 

Just as the male lead tells the female lead how much he’s really been crushing on her the whole time they’ve been trying to save her mom’s restaurant, your phone begins to buzz. Unfortunately for you, it’s been buzzing all day. 

Harry. 

Over and over again. 

He’s been texting and calling and truthfully, he actually sounds really concerned.

Harry 11/28/23

Hey petal. Been trying to reach you for a bit. Is everything okay? We good? 

Harry 12/1/23

Miss you. Text me. 

Harry 12/3/23

Answer meeee please? 

Harry 12/7/23

Feel like you’re avoiding me. 

Harry 12/7/23

Did I do something? I’m sorry if I did. 

Harry 12/14/23

Just please let me know you’re alright. I’m getting worried. 

Harry 12/17/23 Starting to think that you’re dead. 

Harry 12/22/23

I’m gonna stop bothering you now. But I miss you. Please text me back. 

Harry 12/24/23

Okay I lied about the bothering thing. I need to see you and I’m really worried and if you’re dead I’m gonna ask the police to do a wellness check. So answer me. 

The sheer desperation in his texts almost broke you, but for all you know he just misses the sex, and the thought of that breaks you even more. 

You grab the pillow on your couch and thrust it up to your face to scream into it. The second you get done screaming you hear your doorbell and you jump. You wonder who in their right mind would be out in this weather but you pause your movie and  go to open it nonetheless. 

What you didn’t expect was a Harry Styles covered in snow at your door. 

“Hey...can I come in? S’snowing like really hard.” It breaks your heart a little the way he added that last bit in, like you would refuse him otherwise.

“Of course. Do you want any tea?” you ask, trying to avoid the elephant in the room in case that’s not why he came here. 

“No I’m― I came here to um…talk.”

Fuck. 

“Okay.” You giggle, trying to lighten the mood but his sullen expression stays put. 

“I’m still gonna start the kettle in case you want any―” 

“Why’re you pulling away from me?” he blurts out.

“Wha―”

“I literally haven’t spoken to you in weeks. Have I done something wrong? I―I” he pauses to compose himself and your frown deepens, “I miss you. Miss you so much and I just wanted to make sure we were okay.” 

You push yourself away from the couch and walk up to him, making sure to keep eye contact knowing how important it is to him,”of course we are, H.” 

“You haven’t spoken to me in like a mo―” 

“Shh, shh. Was just swamped with work. You know how I get all in my head.” You know you shouldn’t be lying to him, you really shouldn’t. But the way he’s talking like the idea of you purposely ignoring him breaks him, you don’t have it in you to let him suffer any longer.

He nods and you smile at him, bringing your hands up to tangle in his hair, “we’re okay. I promise.” 

“Promise?” he whispers and your heart flutters. 

“Yeah.” You hate lying to his face. 

You start your steps to go to the kitchen but his grip on your wrist pulls you back, nearly crashing into his chest. 

“Want a kiss, please.” his voice never leaves that soft whisper. You lean in to give him a soft kiss, suddenly feeling a pit in your stomach that only deepens the closer you get to him. You’ve always had a bad habit of putting someone’s comfort over yours. 

“Do you want tea?” you whisper against his lips. 

“Always want some fuckin’ tea.” he says with a smirk and a quiet chuckle, that joyful inflection back in his voice and that familiar sparkle back in his eyes. 

When you step out of the kitchen with the tea he’s sitting on the couch in a relaxed manner, picking at the loose strings in your pillows and watching the movie you have on. His lips stretch in a gentle smile when he sees you and you force yourself to return it. 

You sit down next to him and he places his hand softly on your thigh, leaning over to you to place a soft kiss on your jaw. He trails more and more down to your neck and you feel your stomach twist. Your hand shoots to his chest to halt any further movement and you rush out words in a short breath, “We can’t.” There’s a beat of silence. He backs away quickly to not make you uncomfortable and you sigh and whisper, “...I can’t” 

Your eyes flick up to meet his gaze and you can tell that without an explanation your rejection stings him a little. 

“Don’t you have like…a thing? With that girl you brought to Thanksgiving?” you watch his face twist tightly in confusion and you can’t bear to hear him make excuses or lie to you so you just continue to ramble, “does she even know that you’re sleeping with other people? With me? Like if I was your girlfriend I’d be pretty fucking pissed that you’re over here and touching me after bringing her to Thanksgiving of all places—” 

“Shut up.” He cuts off your ramble sharply. You suck in a breath at his tone (and after speaking all those words without a break) and your chest tightens at his stern expression. 

“W-what?” you fumble through the word. Never in your life have you seen him this angry. He’s looking at you with a gaze that can only be described as absolutely vexed. 

“That’s why you’ve been avoiding me?” If there’s one thing Harry is, it’s smart. He’s absolutely not an idiot. But you absolutely are for not realizing just how well he knows you, “you’ve barely spoken to me for a month. Didn’t answer my calls, texts, not going out when you know I’d be there because you thought I’d betray your trust like that and just pop up one day with a fucking girlfriend!?” You can tell that he’s trying to control his volume and anger. The way his fist and jaw is clenched is an obvious indication. 

“Well what was I supposed to think, Harry? You brought her and she was beautiful and you had your hand on her wai–” 

“And you weren’t gonna let me explain myself!? I’d never do that to you. It was—We–we had a deal!” he exclaims incredulously, ducking down to meet your eyes when you try and look away. 

“I know we had a deal, H. I’m sorry for jumping to conclusions—” He interrupts you again and you sigh deeply. 

“And I can’t believe that you would think…I thought it was different…I thought you…” he trails off, his voice getting softer as his speaking slows.

“You thought I what?” you ask urgently. He looks down at his hands and picks at the nail on his thumb. You frown softly, “you thought I what, H?”

His expression almost looks tortured as he trains his gaze on his fingers. You suddenly feel terrible. You ignored him for so long all over a simple misunderstanding. You think back to the moment that it all happened and figure you might have avoided all of this if you just let him properly introduce her like he was trying to. Your lip trembles softly at the idea of hurting him and he sighs. 

“I thought you felt the same way as I did. I thought it wasn’t just a deal to you.” he admisses so very quietly. So quiet that if the TV was any louder you wouldn’t have heard it. His brows are tightly knit together and his lips are turned down into a deep pout. 

Harry almost regretted it when he said it. He knows that if you truly don’t feel the same, it’ll never go back to the way it was, and he’ll lose the person he cares about the most. He’ll lose the person he loves the most. His heart squeezes painfully in his chest and he avoids looking up at your expression in fear that your expression will be less than kind. 

He speaks before you can even process what he just said, “Ellie’s my cousin.” he breathes out a humorless laugh, “the girl I brought to Thanksgiving. I thought you’d love her.” the soft tone and volume of his voice remains constant.

You feel like your brain just short circuited. Harry just told you that he actually has feelings for you. That all this time he’s been thinking about you in the same way that you’ve been thinking about him. All this time. 

And you’re sitting here like an idiot letting him stew in confusion and not saying a word. 

“Oh my god.” you gasp like you’ve suddenly been slapped back into reality. Your hands rush over to him like they have a mind of their own with thoughts that tell them that they need to be close to him. You grasp his face in your hands and pull his head up so you can look into his eyes. 

“H.” you sigh. He watches your mouth form around the word and he decides right then and there that no matter what you’re going to say next, no matter if you reject him and tell him you could never see him that way, you will always make him weak. Looking into your eyes will always break and mend him at the same time, the sound of you saying his name will always make him crumble.

“Of course I feel the same way. Are you kidding? I thought that you didn’t.” you finally, finally admit. It immediately feels like a giant weight has been lifted off of your chest and you almost wanna cry at how freeing it feels. 

“Are you serious?” he laughs, although you can see that his eyes are a bit glossy. You pout softly, nodding and leaning down to envelop his lips in yours. 

“I’ve always needed you, petal. Even before the sex. I need you to know that.” he speaks with conviction. He needs you to know that it’s not just the sex muddling his brain and making him attached. He really truly loves you. Everything about you. 

“I know, I know H.” you nod again. 

“You’ve got no fuckin’ idea how much I missed you, petal. No clue.” His voice is thick with emotion, but also filled with that familiar lust that you missed so much. 

You scoot closer to him on the couch and throw your legs around his lap to straddle him, “feel like showing me?” 

He chuckles darkly, his hands quickly landing on your waist. His mouth closes to form into a smirk when you blatantly offer your body up for him like this. A soft noise leaves you in reaction to the tight grip he has on your waist. 

Your hips take on a mind of their own when they start to shift against him. A soft hiss followed by a groan leaves his lips. It’s like your lips are magnets the way you can’t keep them away from each other. He leans up to kiss you and the movement of your hips intensifies. 

You can see it in his eyes that he’s thinking of some sort of punishment to sort out your behavior of the past month. The intensity in his expression makes you feel a sort of anxiousness that throws you for a loop. You feel a little scared, but all the excitement and anticipation just overrides that tiny bit of fear. 

He leans closer to you to leave open mouthed kisses all over the exposed skin of your chest, he kisses until he reaches the fabric of your shirt and his hand falls to your ass, gripping it tightly while urging you to continue the movement of your hips against him. 

“Gonna have to teach you a lesson it seems.” His voice is husky and deep when he speaks, you know that he has the capacity to absolutely ruin you tonight, and you know that he will. 

He taps your hip with his fingers, his usual signal that he needs you to stand up. Your brows furrow in confusion briefly, but the confusion is gone as soon as it came when he speaks. 

“Do me a favor, honey?” 

You nod eagerly. 

“Get out that vibrator you’ve got in your dresser, clothes off and wait for me in your room.” His voice held a velvety, sensual tone, and combined with what he said, you’re nearly weak in the knees. When you stand there for a moment, having a bit of trouble getting your body to move as fast as your brain, he urges you with a raise of his eyebrow and you immediately spring into action. 

You hear his quiet murmur of “good girl” as you start to walk to your room. Every nerve in your body is buzzing with anticipation. Harry is already amazing in the bedroom with just him, imagining the pleasure you’ll feel with him and the toy is making you squeeze your thighs together and your eyes shut as you dwell in your thoughts. 

You sat down on your bed (very submissively, you hope it’ll get you some brownie points) with your vibrator laying next to you. Just when you’re starting to get impatient, the door opens with Harry on the other side of it. There’s a very distinct hunger in his eyes as he looks at you, as his gaze travels the length of your body. You can tell he appreciates the way you’re sitting. 

He doesn’t waste any time walking towards you and kneeling until his knees touch the floor and he’s level with where you need him the most. His hands find purchase on your thighs, immediately squeezing and prodding at them like he’s playing with his favorite toy (which he technically is), “you’re so good for me, petal. Doing as I asked.” 

His eyes flick up to yours after he speaks, and the eye contact, especially when he’s got that look going, makes you melt. You’re hyper aware of the tortuous way his hands are trailing upwards. He knows the way his touch works you up no matter where it is, and he’s using it to his advantage. 

A sharp gasp rips from your throat when he spreads your thighs apart. It’s embarrassing how wet you’ve gotten from just the anticipation and thought of what he’s going to do to you. The groan that he let out once he saw what a mess you’ve made is an indication that he was pleased. 

“Jesus, petal. Look what you’ve done…” he stares at your center with an expression of deep desire as he reaches out a hand to trail two fingers through your folds, collecting your arousal on his fingertips, “messing up your sheets, baby. This all for me?” 

You can’t help but obediently nod, meeting his eyes with a pleading look, “only for you, promise. Please?” 

His face is painted with an expression of faux confusion, that condescending look that makes you clench around nothing and tip your head up to the ceiling in frustration. You know from that look this is going to be harder than you thought. He’s in the mood to tease. He’s going to break you.

“Please? Please what, baby. What do you need from me?” You’re impressed by the way he’s looking at you like he’s actually concerned and wondering what you want, and although you know it’s an act and he’s not asking because he truly plans on giving it to you, you still give in.

“Touch me, Harry. Need it.” You should be embarrassed at the whiny inflection in your voice as you beg him, but you can’t find it in yourself to feel shame when you’re aching as bad as you are. 

“You need it?” He teases and you know even he’s getting tired of this waiting game because his expression has melted down into a lazy grin, enjoying the way he’s torturing you. 

You can tell that he isn’t exactly mad any more, which you’re grateful for. He’s just enjoying toying with the body that he knows so well. 

You scoff and roll your eyes, pushing your hips towards him needily. It earns you a dark chuckle and a sigh, “alright, alright.” 

Without leaving his position on his knees, he reaches for the vibrator. Before you can beg any more, he’s switching it on and bringing it down to where you need it the most. He doesn’t even offer up a warning before he’s placing it directly on your clit, ripping a shocked moan from your throat. 

“Yeah?” His voice is taunting and low, and if the vibrator was any louder you wouldn’t be able to hear him, but it still hits you right in the gut like his voice usually does when he talks to you like this, “is that good? Right here?” 

“Fuck, yes. Stay right there.” you stutter through your words in a way that you know he’ll tease you for later, but you don’t have the brain capacity to care right now. All you can think about and feel is him, that vibrator on your clit, the way he’s talking. 

When he presses it harder against you, you breathe in deeply, exhaling in a whiney moan. He’s making you unravel at a quick and embarrassing pace and the sensations are overwhelming you. Your hips start to shift in tandem with the way he’s slowly rubbing the head of the vibrator back and forth against your clit, the sounds that leave your throat travel straight to his cock that’s still confined in his pants. He growls lowly when he notices your thighs start to shake and leans closer to suck kisses into them, “close already? Fuck look at that, honey…” he’s referring to the way your arousal is coating the toy. He almost feels tempted to bring it to his lips and clean it off, “this dreamy cunt needed it so bad, hm?”

You couldn’t respond even if you tried, your brain a mess of syllables and sounds that you’re meant to put together. All you can manage is a string of whimpers as you get closer and closer to your peak.

Harry watches your every move, so in tune with every twitch of your body and every sound you make. He moans along with you as you come undone, making sure to keep the toy right where it’s been to help you ride it out, anything to keep making his girl feel good. 

You reach for his hand to ground you and he quickly gives you what you need, interlocking your fingers and groaning when you squeeze tightly, “there you go…fuck.” 

You push yourself away from the toy when it becomes too much as best as you can, desperate to escape the onslaught of overstimulation and he chuckles, pulling the toy off of you. You can barely grip your bearings as he brings the toy to his lips to clean off with his tongue, he moans needily when he tastes you and squeezes your hand as if to say he’s proud of you. 

He puts the toy down next to you and starts to kiss his way up your body. Mumbling little words of encouragement and praise on his journey to your lips. 

“Did such a good job.” 

“M’so proud of you.” 

“You come so pretty.” 

“So beautiful.”  

When you guys are face to face he pinches your lips with his fingers before he leans down to kiss you, moaning into the kiss since he was deprived of them in the short time that he was making you come. 

“Hi.” You breathe out in a chuckle, your mind still muddled from the post climactic haze. He returns your greeting, his voice soft and tender with an adoration filled expression on his face. 

“Aren’t you like–” you motion your head downwards to refer to the way he’s straining in his pants and a chuckle leaves his lips. He nods gently, still staring at you with that fond look in his eye. 

“Mhm.” he mumbles. He repositions himself so he can take off his clothes and after he teases you for nearly drooling over his abs, comes back down to rest against you so that your chests are touching, “you wanna keep going?”

You know he’s asking to be respectful, but you can also tell that if you say no he’d probably cry. You can feel how hard he is against your thigh and see the strain in his expression. He subtly shifts his hips every so often against your skin and you have to fight back a smirk at how needy he is. 

You nod before you remember his thing about verbal consent and you mumble out a soft yes. As soon as he has your permission, he’s connecting your lips and lining up his tip with your entrance. He drags his tip back and forth against you, your body twitching in sensitivity every time he passes over your clit. 

A guttural groan leaves him as he finally fills you, a groan that melts into a whine as you clench down around him tightly, forcing yourself to adjust to the burning stretch that you’ve missed so much. 

“Fuck, I missed you.” The sound of his voice and the sounds he’s making just make you clench down tighter around him, “how do you always feel this fucking good? Squeezing me like a vice, pretty.”  

He sets a rhythm that has him hitting that spot inside you that makes you melt every time, somehow even though he’s been aching in his pants for so long his focus still remains solely on bringing you pleasure, making you feel good, “s’that okay, sweet girl. S’it good for you? Am I giving this needy cunt what it needs?” 

You know he doesn’t expect you to respond but he speaks anyway. He’s well aware of the effect his voice has on you.His deliberate thrusts gain more momentum with every reaction you give him. He truly feeds on your pleasure. It’s as if he suddenly remembers the emotional turmoil you forced the both of you to go through the past month, because his thrusts begin to get more purposeful. Rougher, more pointed motions of his hips rip noises from you that you’re sure is gonna give you a sore throat later. 

His hand wraps around your throat in a firm grip, leaning down to grit words out into your ear, “you’re mine, understand that? You’re mine. And I’m yours. No one else’s. I belong to you, petal. Just you.” 

He fights the strong pull in his chest that tells him to tell you how he really feels, how in love he is with you. How you consume his every thought and how your touch is unlike any other touch he’s ever felt. From the first time he was already addicted. You’re unlike anyone else that he’s ever met, you feel like home. 

The force of his thrusts knock all of the air out of your lungs, and all you can do is nod and mumble out an agreement. You need to be his. There might not be anything that you want more right now. Hearing him confess his feelings for you right now as he’s fucking you into oblivion do all the right things for you, and like clockwork, he immediately recognizes what you need and switches back on the vibrator, bringing it right back down to your clit. 

“Fuck that’s it, baby. Am I fucking you right, petal? Yeah? Fucking show me then. Come for me.” He presses the toy harder against you and rolls his hips in just the perfect way that makes him rub against that perfect spot inside you and you realize now that he made good on his word of teaching you a lesson. You are sufficiently taught.

He whines loudly at the feeling of you coming around him, mumbling out praises and thank you’s as you milk him for everything he’s worth, “shit, m’gonna fucking come. Fuck keep cumming, baby. Keep fucking squeezing me like that–” his words are cut off with a series of noises that you know is going replay in your head on loop. 

He rides out his pleasure with slow, lazy thrusts, hiding his face in your neck as he tries to cope with all the pleasure that’s wracking through his body. You tangle your hands in his hair to offer him some comfort, both of you breathing heavily. He continues to mumble praises into your damp skin, filling you with a warm fuzzy feeling that transcends anything you’ve ever felt before. 

When he catches his breath he turns his head to rest it on your shoulder and speaks, “you know I meant it right?” 

“Meant what?” 

“I’m yours. And you’re mine.” 

December 31st, New Years Eve. 

Your friend’s makeshift bar is bustling and you chuckle as the poor untrained bartender is trying to grapple with it all. You’re sipping slowly at a glass of champagne when you feel a strong arm link around your waist. 

“Mm hi baby.” his deep voice reverberates through your entire body as he speaks directly into your ear. You melt into his grasp and your lips break into a smile that you couldn’t stop even if you tried. 

“Harry.” you say cheekily as your hands fall to hold onto his arm. He had just come back from an absolute killer karaoke performance next to your friend’s TV. The whole entire house was cheering for him as he belted out an incredible rendition of “Hopelessly Devoted to You”. Ever the performer, your boyfriend is, “you were amazing. As always.” you giggle and he presses a messy, wet kiss to your cheeks. 

He is absolutely glowing tonight. Surrounded by his family, friends, and you. He’s beyond ready to spend the next year being annoyingly in love with you and attached to your hip. In fact, that’s the thing he’s looking forward to the most about the new year, going through every milestone, change, and holiday with the love of his life. 

“Always strokin’ m’ego, petal. Looove you.” you laugh loudly at how inebriated he is and lean your head back against his shoulder to get closer to him. 

“I love you too, H. I think you’re cut off though.” you chuckle and you can hear the pout in his voice when he speaks. 

“Wha’? Wha’s wrong with you? M’not even that drunk m’love.” The irony of his words slurring while he’s trying to convince you that he isn’t drunk isn’t lost on you. You turn around to face him and it’s like his expression melts into a smile when he looks at you. 

You don’t know how you never noticed it before, the way he looks at you. He stares at you with so much awe, so much reverence. Ever since you’ve noticed it the first time, it’s the first thing that catches your attention when you guys are together. That damn look. 

“Y’so pretty.” He brings his hand up to stroke your face with his thumb. 

You turn your face to kiss his palm and he giggles childishly, mumbling something about it tickling.

It’s not long before the countdown starts. Harry and you look at each other in anticipation, wanting to commemorate the first time you guys expressed the affection for each other that’s only increased ten fold. 

9

8

“I think New Years is m’favorite holiday.” he mumbles out, looking down at you with that familiar fond look. 

6

“Yeah?” you giggle at his admission, “why’s that, H?” 

4

“S’cause it’s the day that I finally got you.” You can barely register the cheers of happy new year before his lips are on yours, claiming them and making you his. You pull away reluctantly to breathe and smile at him when you speak.

“I think it’s my new favorite too, baby.”

[russos-one]

Jessie Fleming x Reader

Let her believe I never loved her (Part 1)

Inspired by Cigarettes Out The Window x Dangerously Yours - TV girl/That tiktok audio that goes “let her think I never loved her”

Summary- R has been hopelessly in love with Jessie ever since she joined Chelsea but has never had the courage to tell her and then it's too late

Warnings- Magda yelling in Swedish, R, Niamh and Sam being little shits, Jessie being a cutie pie, Fluff

Word count- 1783

A/N- Pretend Pernille and Magda never left because I miss them and that Sam never did her forbidden 3 letters

A/N- All the Swedish and Danish are from Google Translate and I have no idea if it is right or not

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Just tell her! What's the worst that could happen?” Niamh urged.

“Well, I don’t know—maybe she doesn’t like me back, and I’d lose three and a half years of friendship!” you replied.

“That wouldn’t happen; she obviously likes you back!”

“You don’t know that! Just let it go,” you said, turning back to your bag.

“You can’t avoid it forever!” you sighed, zipping it up.

“Fine, yes I ca—” Suddenly, there was a knock on the door of your shared hotel room.

“Just drop it, Niamh,” you said as you opened the door.

You were met with a smiling Jessie. “Jessie! Hi!” Niamh poked her head out from behind you. “Hey, Jessie!”

Jessie made eye contact with you and smiled. “Hello, Y/N.” Niamh sighed loudly. “Okay, just act like I'm not here, I guess,” she joked, rolling her eyes.

Jessie broke eye contact with you to look at Niamh. “Hello to you too, Niamh,” she said.

“Do you want to come in?” you asked, opening the door wider and stepping aside.

“Unfortunately, I can't. Emma sent me up here because you two are taking too long, and the coach is about to leave.”

You turned to Niamh. “Look what you did! Now Emma is mad at us, and she's going to make us run extra laps!”

Niamh gasped. “It's not my fault you were too busy arguing with me about how in love with Je—jumping jacks! How in love you are with jumping jacks!”

“Jumping jacks?” Jessie turned back to you.

“Yeah, I just love jumping jacks in a workout,” You said, looking confused.

“Okay then! We need to get going.”

“Right,” you replied, grabbing your bag and dragging Niamh by her arm out of the hotel room, with Jessie following behind you, giggling at your antics.

The three of you reached the coach, where an irritated Emma Hayes was waiting. “What were you two doing!? You know what, who cares, just get in!” she said, dragging you and Niamh inside while Jessie followed closely behind.

“Y/N!” Magda called, waving you over. “You're sitting with me, come.” She patted the seat next to her. You parted ways with Jessie and Niamh and made your way to Magda.

“I’m surprised you’re not sitting with Pernille,” you said.

“Choose her over you? Never. So, how’s the love life going?”

You sighed rather dramatically. “It's non-existent.”

Magda raised an eyebrow. “So we’re pretending your massive crush on Jessie doesn’t exist?”

You instantly turned red and glanced at Jessie, who was fast asleep, cuddled into her neck pillow. You turned back to Magda, scolding her. “What if she hears?!”

“She’s the deepest sleeper in the world! I honestly don’t know how she fell asleep so fast. The chances of her hearing that are smaller than your chances of actually telling her you have a crush on her.”

Just then, you heard two gasps from behind your seat. Millie and Sam butted their heads in between yours and Magda’s. “Are we finally addressing Y/N’s huge crush on baby Canada?”

“Shhhh! What if she hears?” you hissed.

“As if she's going to hear; she sleeps like a bear during hibernation.”

“How do you know what hibernation means?”

“I just do! Now stop changing the subject!”

You sighed. “This conversation isn’t worth continuing.” You rolled your eyes and leaned further into your seat.

“Please, for the love of God, just let me sleep! I get enough of this from Niamh, and now you three?”

Niamh turned to look at you all. “Hey! I heard my name! What are you four planning?”

You groaned. “Nothing, Niamh! Now go back to fantasizing about your body pillow.”

Niamh looked stunned, and the whole coach erupted in giggles. “Y/N’s lying! I don’t have a body pillow!” she announced dramatically.

“Sure you don’t!” Sam said sarcastically.

After some teasing, everyone finally calmed down, and you were able to relax. You turned to Jessie, taking in her features: the freckles sprinkled across her beautiful face, the way she let out soft snores as she slept, and even the tiny drool on her pillow. She looked so peaceful.

Your trance was broken by Magda's voice: “You’re staring, creep.”

“I’m not staring! I’m just appreciating beauty.”

“Mhmm, sureee.”

“Just leave me alone; I'm going to sleep.”

Sam chimed in again. “Mhmm, so you can dream about your girlfriend.”

“Ooh la la,” Millie added.

You sighed, slowly succumbing to sleep.

“Y/n? Y/n, wake up!” someone said, shaking your shoulder. You groaned and leaned further into your chair.

“Just let me sleep, please.” You heard footsteps approaching and someone say, “Here, this will work.” Giggles followed, but you didn’t bother to open your eyes; you simply kept them closed.

Out of nowhere, you felt cold water hit your face, and you jolted upright. As you opened your eyes, you saw the culprit

“Niamh! You bastard!”

She started giggling. “You weren’t waking up! It was either that or a slap to the face.”

“I’d rather have a slap to the face because you’re weak.”

Niamh gasped. “I am not weak!”

From behind Niamh, you saw an angry Emma Hayes approaching. “Ladies! What are you doing? We have a game to play in a few hours, and one of you is soaking wet while the other is yelling that she’s not weak! And then there’s Jessie…” Jessie offered an awkward smile.

After some arguing and Emma dragging Niamh and I out of the coach, with Jessie following closely behind, we finally made it inside the stadium.

“So where are we going?” you asked, turning to Niamh.

“Jessie, where are we going?” Niamh echoed, looking at her.

“Do you two ever listen?” Sam chimed in from behind us. “I truly don't know what you expect from dumb and dumber,” she said, draping her arms over Niamh's and your shoulders.

Jessie groaned. “As if you can talk.”

“Blah, blah, blah. Anyway, Jessie, do you know where we’re going? I was doing media with Emma, and I got lost,” Jessie let out a breath. “Children surround me.”

Sam gasped. “I’m actually older than you, so that makes you the child. These two, though…” She messed up Niamh’s and I's hair. “They are children!”

Just then, my phone buzzed in my pocket. “Sam, shut up; someone’s calling me.” I pulled my phone out and saw it was Magda calling. I answered and put her on speaker.

“Hey Magdaaa! My favorite teammate!”

“I thought I was your favorite teammate?” Jessie mumbled.

“Where are you three? And have you seen Sam?”

“Hi, Magda,” Sam said. “You four are in so much trouble!”

“Sam made us get lost!” Niamh quickly protested.

“Whoa, okay, so blame it on me? You guys were lost before I even showed up!”

“Just shut up and get here!”

“And where exactly would ‘here’ be?” I asked.

“The changing room!” Magda yelled before ending the call.

“Anyone know where the changing room is?” you said.

“Oh my God, just follow me and don’t get lost,” Jessie said as she led you, Sam, and Niamh to the changing room.

We entered to find an angry Magda, Millie barely containing her laughter, and Zecira filming us.

“Vi har ett spel att spela om mindre än en timme och vad gör ni tre? gå vilse! Dumma, dummaste och dummaste!” She pointed at me, Niamh, and Sam. "Jessie you did nothing, but these three are terrible"

We have a game to play in less than an hour and what are you three doing? getting lost! Dumb, Dumber and Dumbest!

Zecira collapsed on the floor, laughing uncontrollably. Sam leaned over and whispered, “Yo, what the heck did she just say?” I shrugged.

Pernille stepped in from behind Magda, pulling her back from us while giggling. “Min elskede, they can't understand you.”

Magda looked like a ticking time bomb. “Just go get dressed!” she snapped, pointing to our cubbies.

The four of us headed to our cubbies to change. As we got ready, Magda came up from behind Sam and lightly slapped her on the back of the neck. “Stop getting the children lost!”

Sam looked offended. “Firstly, ow! Secondly, they were lost when I found them!”

We changed into our training kits and made our way to the pitch for warm-ups. We were paired up, and I got Jessie as my partner. I draped my arm over her shoulders. “Why hello there, pretty lady.” Jessie turned red, though it was probably just the cold. “Hello, Y/n.”

We found a free space on the pitch. “Are you ready to dominate warm-ups?” I asked.

“Obviously,” Jessie replied.

“High five!” I said, putting my hand up.

“Seriously?” she responded.

“Yes, seriously.”

“Are you going to trick me?” Jessie asked skeptically.

I gasped, “Never!” She gave me a high five.

“See? I told you I wasn't gonna trick you.”

“Surprisingly. Time to warm up before you get in trouble with Magda again.” We faced each other, using one another for stability, like that TikTok of McFoord training together.

“So, how’s the love life going?” Jessie asked.

I let out a breath. “The love life is non-existent,” I replied, switching legs.

“What about Real Madrid's goalkeeper, Misa? I saw you two talking after the game last week,” she questioned.

“Ooo, getting jealous are we?” I teased.

She lightly punched my shoulder. “Ow!” I yelped.

“That wasn't even hard! And I was just asking a question.”

“Nothing is going on between me and Misa. We’ve been friends ever since Alexia introduced us before the World Cup final. Why do you ask?”

“No reason,” she replied.

“Mhmmm, sure,” I said sarcastically.

“What do you mean ‘Mhmmm sure’? And why did you say it like that?” she asked.

“No reason,” I shot back with a grin.

[yongbokkk]

by the waters, part 1

pairings: lee know x m!reader

genre: fluff, mermaid au

a/n: hi im back i think... my apologies

stray kids had been waiting forever for their vacation, so they decided to spend all their peaceful time on an island. not many people were touring and the water was still fresher than ever. not to mention, the nature here looked amazing.

the eight of them have already gone to their chosen rooms, beginning to unpack. minho went to the balcony to stare at the scenery, the ocean waves crashing into each other as the water sparkled.

jisung came up to him, "yah, i bet you there's a mermaid out there." he leaned on the glass fence, joining minho.

"mermaids? you're crazy." minho shook his head.

"can't be always wrong." the younger one lightly gasped, "how about you drown, and then a mermaid would come and save you!" he teased.

"you want me to die or something? it's so unlikely they exist, it's just a fairy tale." minho kept denying.

"hmm, okay, believe whatever you want ~" jisung waved him goodbye and went back inside the house.

the older sighed, before heading back in since it was getting late.

it was the morning, and minho went out for a long stroll outside on the island. the breeze was cold but very refreshing. this island was such a good pick for them.

the brunette found two stray cats, which was weird for them to be here. nonetheless, he fed and played with them for almost an hour.

it was a struggle for him to not scoop the kittens up and adopt them, he felt bad he had to leave the two cuties. minho eventually got bored and decided to go fishing, not the best, but he liked to try.

minho went by the waters with a fishing rod, he tied the hook on with the fish bait and threw it into the water.

After a few minutes of waiting, there was a huge tug on the string. he must've caught a big one, he'll definitely tell this to the members.

but as he was pulling it up, streams of crimson blood were found at the surface of the water. did the fish bleed that much?

he was wrong, it wasn't a fish he had caught.

minho's eyes widened as he pulled up a bleeding man, with fishtails for legs.

jisung was right, mermen and mermaids were real.

minho panicked, watching the person hiss at the hook painfully attached to his skin. he couldn't just sit there in shock, he needed to do something.

he quickly unwrapped the scarf that was on his neck, rushing to the merman. minho carefully took the hook out and wrapped the scarf around the boy's bleeding arm.

"i'm sorry, i'm sorry, i'm sorry..." minho kept apologizing for hurting the person, but all the merman did was stare at the human.

finally, he took the time to look at the merman, and boy, he was the most beautiful thing minho's eyes ever laid down on.

"it's okay, you didn't mean it. right?" the merman was unsure whether to trust the human or not.

"never in my life will i hurt anyone intentionally." he finished tying the scarf around the arm securely, "..are you fine with getting medical help?" he looked around, trying to see if he could find anyone.

"no! don't let them discover me!" the merman sounded scared and nervous. minho understood and dropped calling for help.

"how are we gonna patch that up, then?" he questioned, pointing at the deep wound underneath the cloth.

"the water helps me heal, it'll take a while but you don't have to worry." the h/c put a reassuring smile, which the dancer found ethereal.

"ah, alright." minho was still shocked that he had witnessed a real-life merman, he thought it was all a fairy tale. "do you have a name?"

"y/n, what about yours?" y/n's mesmerizing eyes sparkled in minho's view.

"minho." he smiled, wanting this moment to last forever.

"...promise you won't tell anyone about me?" y/n practically begged, making a stern and serious face.

"of course, i wouldn't tell the world."

minho kept his word and never told anyone about the encounter. when they asked about the missing scarf, he made the excuse of accidentally leaving it somewhere.

jisung wasn't that convinced, he couldn't have just left the scarf somewhere.

"i don't believe you, bet you left it in someone's bedroom." jisung smirked suggestively, making minho scrunch in disgust.

"no, i'm telling the truth." he rolled his eyes, returning back to cooking for the members.

"have you seen a mermaid yet?" jisung asked, catching minho off guard as he made a cut in his fingers with the knife.

"ow!" minho hissed. "l-like i said, mermaids don't exist." he said, causing jisung to sigh loudly.

after eating a delicious meal, all eight of them went to their bedrooms for slumber, except for minho.

his mind was stuck on a certain merman from earlier, he still couldn't believe there were actually living mer-creatures, and that he was lucky enough to meet one.

that next day, minho told the members that he'd be going for another walk again. they didn't care much but to wish him safe.

well, his heart had other intentions. he found himself sitting on the tough but comfortable rock, staring off at the far sea, waiting for y/n's arrival.

since it was unplanned, it was very unlikely for him to show up. so why did minho feel the need to come by?

he waited, and waited, to the point where the said 'walk' he told the other members was now considered a lie. minho slightly had his hopes up for the beautiful creature to pop up.

seeing as it has been almost an hour, he was bound to give up. minho stood up from his seat on the rock, but before he could turn away, the water sparkled.

he was there.

[im-sleepdeprived]

Seasonal • Pt. 5

pairing: peter parker x reader

summary: inspired by the taylor swift song ‘peter’ where you and peter discover just how hard it is to hold on to something from your past, no mater how much you love each other

a/n: FINAL PARTTTT !!!!! im so sorry it took so long ive just been getting my ass kicked with life recently and ive been away from my laptop and stable wifi for tooooo long. for anyone who stuck it out till now, i literally can not put into words how much i love you. this series has been so much fun for me, and i put a lot of work and love into it so thank you sooo very much for reading, every last one of you <33333

warnings: cursing, james, peter’s such a cutie here, some chaos, an accident, fire, bodily injuries, mentions of blood, there’s a scene where they’re reading medical charts, I have no idea how accurate it is so let’s not dwell. she’s a long one, so buckle up, grab a snack, and I realllyyyy hope you enjoy <33

masterlist, read part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4

You’d never asked Peter why he always called you ‘Ace’. The one time you remember asking anything he’d said ‘think it suits you, don’t you?’ And you’d just accepted it. Honestly, you loved it. It was special, it was yours. Something between you and him. Even after the two of you had broken up, he’d still used it, and you were thankful for that because you weren’t sure you could handle that being gone too. He’d never call anyone else by that name and no one else would call you by that except him. It was important to the both of you. 

And apparently, James could see that.

“I just don’t understand why he can’t call you by your fucking name.” He sneered, and you fought the urge to roll your eyes. All in all, at the end of the day, it was just a nickname.

“James, I don’t really get what the big deal is here. So we used to be close, and he has a nickname for me, that’s not exactly rare. It’s just a thing people do.”

“Ace,” he said and immediately, you knew it was wrong. No one else was supposed to call you that, no one except Peter. And the way he’d said it ‘Ace’ like he was disgusted, like it was the worst syllable that could leave his mouth. The complete opposite of the way Peter said it. 

When Peter said it, it made you feel special, it made you feel seen in a way no one else had ever made you feel. It was said with care and wit, with charm and love. With love. Always with love. 

“I swear I haven’t heard your name come out his mouth once since we’ve been around him, it’s always ‘Ace, Ace, Ace’” James scoffed and the sound left a foul taste in your mouth. Things had been like this since Peter had transferred. At first, it was just a few questions here and there. But after the photography contest and Peter’s collage of you winning first place and being blasted everywhere, it had definitely gotten more heated.

You hadn’t told him about that morning in the park, as far as James was aware, you hadn’t seen Peter since the party. In truth, you hadn’t seen him since that morning, when he’d said all those things, and used your first name. You weren’t avoiding him, per se, just…trying your best to not be around him. Your article came out in a couple days. All your notes had been taken, and you’d already done your research, so it was easy to work from home so far. That couldn’t last forever.  

You didn’t know what to say to James, so you kept silent in hopes of avoiding angering him even more. You didn’t know what he wanted you to say, offer to ask Peter to cool it with the nickname? Maybe, probably. But you weren’t going to do that. You weren’t even sure Peter could stop, you couldn’t remember the last time he had said your name either (minus that morning in the park, that seemed like a special circumstance after all), but you preferred it that way with him.

Maybe the right thing to do in this situation would be to change this, talk with Peter and ask him politely to stop because it was making your boyfriend uncomfortable, and because you cared about him and how he felt (your boyfriend), you might try to politely arrange this so both parties didn’t hurt anymore. 

But there was another part of you, the dreamer, the hoper, the girl who used to sit on that hill with Peter and gaze at the stars, the girl who spent months sitting by the window with her lamp on, giving the love of her life every benefit of the doubt, every excuse in the book to cope with how he’d handled things. She didn’t want to do the right thing. She thought James was a dumbass who was being way too dramatic. 

God, you’d known Peter basically your whole life. Every childhood memory, you could spot him in the background somewhere. First day of school? You could see him walking through the doors, holding hands with his Aunt May. First field trip? You could spot him on the bus just a few seats ahead of you. High school graduation? Oh, he was definitely there.

And it isn’t like you actively sought him out either, he was just always…there. Since he came back, it was as if every force in the universe was trying to push the two of you together. That girl who sat by the window would’ve taken that as a clear sign, but not you. You just found it annoying.

Or at least…you thought you did.

You’d been a jumble of mixed, confused, and muddled thoughts since that morning in the park. Peter had said everything you’d once craved to hear from him. And yet, there was still so much you two needed to figure out if things were going to be normal between the two of you. What was normal between the two of you? Could you truly be just friends? After he’d told you he thought about you every day and dreamt about you every night? How does one suddenly go about ‘Oh yeah, that’s my ex. No, we never really resolved things and he just randomly popped back into my life after almost two years of not seeing each other, also, he practically admitted the reason he transferred colleges was because of me. It’s chill though.’ and be normal about it?

Since Peter had come back you’d been feeling a lot of guilt when it came to James. It was, after all, a difficult position to be put in. Your girlfriend’s ex randomly popping up out of nowhere and shoving himself into every aspect of her life? You weren’t an idiot, you knew that would be hard on any guy and you were trying to be so understanding, but it felt like he just wasn’t meeting you in the middle with this. And lately, that guilt had been tinged with something akin to irritation.

For instance, you were always trying to make up for everything going on with Peter. Always making sure to schedule some alone time, whether that be walking around campus or going over to each other’s apartments, sending extra sweet texts, and yet he never seemed to appreciate it. Either James ended up ignoring you, standing you up, or being an insecure moron. There was no need to talk about Peter right now when you were supposed to be spending quality time, and yet it was almost like he couldn’t help himself. Honestly, it was starting to piss you off. It seemed like he had no more interest in you and focused all his energy solely on your ex-boyfriend. He never seemed to appreciate anything anymore. It was almost as if he wanted to stay mad.  

You looked at his eyes, that pretty green shade that’d caught your attention when you’d first met him was long gone and replaced by a darker, stormier shade. Now that you thought about it, you couldn’t recall the last time his eyes had looked that pretty.

“James, we’re supposed to be spending time together,” you tried lightly. “We don’t need to talk about him right now”

You watched as he rolled his eyes and mumbled something under his breath. “What was that?” You asked, irritation dripping in your voice. 

“Nothing,” he said as he shook his head and looked away, only further infuriating you. 

James picked up his phone, scrolling while you stare at him helplessly. “James,” you sigh, “if there’s something bothering you could please let me know instead of—”

His phone dinged. He didn’t even give you a second thought before standing up and pocketing the cellular device. “The boys are chilling at Logan’s, I’m gonna head over there.”

“James.” You called after him as he walked away. “James.” Nothing. A few seconds, then…the slam of the front door. 

You threw your head back on your pillow, letting out an enormous sigh. You didn’t know what to do anymore, you didn’t want to hurt anyone, but it seemed that’s all you were doing. James didn’t even seem to want to put in the effort to make things better, Peter…well you had no clue what was going on with Peter. 

A knock on your open bedroom door caused you to raise your head. Alyssa stood in the doorway holding a carton of ice cream and two spoons. 

“You heard?” You asked. 

She winced, moving across the room to sit beside you on you bed. “Sorry babe, thin walls.”

You hummed, grabbing one of the spoons from her and scooping out a chunk of ice cream into your mouth. “I don’t know what to do!” You mumbled.

She followed suit, “He’s acting like an unreasonable dick, I know.” The both of you nodded. “The only thing I can think of is to give him some time. To settle down, to adjust.”

“I thought that too, but it’s like every time he sees Peter again, all that progress resets! So what’s the answer?”

“Murder Peter?” Lyss suggested, scraping some ice cream onto her spoon. 

You clinked your spoon against hers, “Not funny.”

“You’re right.” She said while laughing, causing you to shove her shoulder lightly. That only made her laugh harder. “I don’t know girl,” she finally spoke once she’d calmed down a bit, “this is kind of a unique situation.”

“Ugh!” You groaned. “Tell me about it.”

“And…I have some news that might not help.”

You paused. “What kind of news?” You asked slowly. 

Alyssa cringed. “I kinda sorta might absolutely need you to come in tomorrow.” 

You gaped at her. She knew you were avoiding Peter. She had just listened to you talk about how terrible it was every time James and Peter were in the same room and now she was trying to get the three of you together?

“I know it’s shitty timing—”

“Shitty timing?!”

She continued as if you hadn’t spoken. “And I wouldn’t do this to you unless I absolutely had to, believe me. But Rajesh, Sabrina, and Cora all called in sick and we still have so much work to do for the next issue so it’s all hands on deck and as your editor I know this is what needs to be done but as your friend…” she pouted at you, “I’m really, really, reallyyyyy sorry sweetie.”

You sighed. There was no choice. “So that’s what this was for?” You asked, motioning your spoon to the tub of ice cream sitting between the two of you. 

“No!” She shook her head in disbelief. “This was because your boyfriend is being stupid, your ex is being weird…and I wanted you to be eating something sweet when I told you about tomorrow.”

The two of you laughed. “Hey,” she said suddenly, throwing an arm over your shoulder, “I still mean what I said, I can fire him.”

“You just said ‘all hands on deck’!”

“Well, after we finish everything that needs to be done.”

You rolled your eyes, “Don’t, bother, he’ll get the hint eventually.”

You didn’t blame Lyss for asking you to come in. At all. 

The news room was a mess. She wasn’t lying when she’d said all hands on deck. In fact, you weren’t sure if all the hands you had would be enough.

“Stephanie, sweetie, that goes over to photography.” You said exasperatedly, trying to keep your composure. This had been the third time you’d directed her. 

“Oh!” she said as if it were the first time. “Got it, sorry Y/N.”

You tried not to roll your eyes, the ruckus of the newsroom and its staff was starting to get to you, but you couldn’t get overwhelmed yet, not with so much still yet to be done. 

Lyss had taken over one half of the room while you took the other. You managed and guided, made some comments here and there, gave tips to some other editors. Your piece was currently undergoing editing by one of them and you had to admit, you were a little anxious. You knew it was good, you had gotten Alyssa to proofread for you, you had also asked James, but he hadn’t gotten a chance. You’d worked your butt off on this piece, but you were afraid after all the…events that had taken place that night, you might have been a little off. 

Speaking of events, you were turning to sneak a look over at Elijah, who was currently working on your article, when you caught a glimpse of extremely familiar brown curls over by the other photographers. All hands on deck, you thought. Ducking your head, you tried to move discreetly to the side when someone stopped you. 

“Y/N! Can we get your opinion on the front page layout?” It was Ryan, one of the photographers. Beside him sat a girl you weren’t quite familiar with, a fresh addition, you supposed. Together, they were working on the layout for the next edition. 

“We weren’t sure whether the headline should go here,” says the girl as she moved a cut-out piece of paper, “or here.”

You froze. There, on the front page, the picture that would be accompanying your article, was you. Or you on that damn collage as Peter held the ribbon with the most forced smile you’d ever seen. Maybe no one else could tell, but you could. You could always tell. Those crinkles by his eyes that you used to love so much weren’t there, a telltale sign. 

Something in your heart broke at that moment, guilt pouring all over you. He had done this amazing thing, made an incredible piece of art, won a really tough competition, and he hadn’t gotten to enjoy it. Because of you. 

“Y/N?” Ryan asked, confused. 

“Sorry.” You snapped out of it. No time for that right now. “Um…” you stared at the layout for a moment before shifting the headline slightly to make it more centered and positioning the photo beneath it. “Does that work? And the article would go here,” you pointed to the bottom of the page where it was empty. 

You watched as Ryan and the girl nodded. “That was my first choice.” Ryan said as he shot the girl a look. You had a feeling they’d been on this for a while. “Oh whatever Ry,” she rolled her eyes, but you could see her fighting back a smile.

“Alright, if you need anything else, just let me know.” You informed them. They agreed, and you moved to make your way around your half of the room again to make sure everything was going as it should be. 

“Y/N!” Lyss came running at you with a panicked look on her face that makes your heart drop. 

“Oh no, what is it?” You asked, already bracing for what might come out of her mouth. 

“I have to go. I just got an email from one of my professors, I have a fucking paper due by tonight and it counts for…well I don’t know, but a good chunk of my final fucking grade.”

Your face fell and you looked at her as if she’d just told you Godzilla was attacking the city. “Lyss, you cannot be serious right now.”

“I know, I know,” Alyssa winced.

“Well, ask for an extension!” You said in disbelief.

“I did! I swear I did, but apparently I’ve already used up all my extensions for that class? I didn’t even know you could do that!”

“Alyssa,” you whined, rubbing at your temple. “What the hell am I supposed to do? I can barely keep up with my half! There’s no way I could handle yours!”

“I’m so sorry, this is totally my fault, I just—” Alyssa was cut off by an all too familiar voice hat made you freeze in your spot. 

“Hey…Listen I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but I heard you talking and I thought I could—”

“No,” You turned towards Peter, shaking your head at him. But the same time you said ‘no’, Alyssa perked up beside you, nodding eagerly. “Lyss,” you murmured quietly, turning towards her and widening your eyes in warning.

“Oh Y/N, come on,” she whined. You were hyperaware of Peter watching everything going down between the two of you. “If he can help, let him! Get some use out of him other than his longing stares across the room.” You noticed Peter fighting a blush, and you tried not to react to her words.

“He wouldn’t have to help if somebody remembered she had a paper to do.” You said with a small huff. 

“I know, I know,” she winced again, “and I swear girl, when I walk that stage to get my degree, I’m gonna thank you in my speech.”

“You don’t get a speech.”

“It’s fine, I’ll steal the microphone.”

You couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped you at her promise. Glancing at Peter, who was still waiting there patiently, you scrunched up your nose at Alyssa, “Does he have to?”

“I’m right here, Ace.” Peter said simply. 

The nickname took you back to your argument with James last night, and you hated it. “That’s kind of the problem, Parker.”

“Hey,” Alyssa spoke up, and she was using her ‘I’m the editor and I decide how things go around here’ voice, making you shut up. “Listen Y/N, I know this is less than ideal, but you wanna be a writer and work in journalism for real? You’re gonna have to learn how to deal with people you don’t exactly get along with. Be professional.”

“And you,” she turned toward Peter, giving him a scathing look. You saw him visibly gulp, which made you feel a little bit better. “As a photographer working at the paper I manage, you’re awesome. But as a person, walking into my best friend’s life and acting the way you do? You piss me off. But…” she held up her hands, “I’ve threatened to fire you and she’s stopped me, so here we are. So, as a member of the paper, and only as a member of this paper, I’m telling you yes, we would appreciate your help while we face this very difficult time with half our team being struck down by The Plague.”

You snorted, “The Plague?”

Alyssa scoffed and looked at you incredulously. “No, seriously! What else do you call three—no, actually, four because Bernice just called me earlier, but what do you call that? They’re all sick!”

“The flu?” Peter tried. 

“You hush,” Alyssa warned him, making you smile. “Now,” she looked between the two of you seriously, “I’m gonna go and try to salvage what I can of my grade, and you two need to play nice and get this issue ready for print and publishing.”

“Yes ma’am,” you said dryly, willing to do it but not willing to do it happily. Peter just nodded quickly, afraid to say anything that might actually get him kicked off the paper for good. 

Alyssa looked between the two of you again before giving you a look, and you knew she was promising to make up for this later at home. You just gave her a smile nod, a promise you’d be alright and she should just go. 

Be professional. You could do that. 

When Alyssa left, Peter turned to you. “Where do you want me Ace?”

“Over there.” You pointed to the half of the room Alyssa had been in charge of. “That was Alyssa’s half, you can take over now. There shouldn’t be much to do, articles are mostly written, things just need proofreading, editing, and we’re still figuring out the layout. If you have any questions, ask me, and if anyone’s being incompetent, they’re not kindergarteners. Don't be afraid to remind them of that.”

“Alright,” he nodded with a serious look on his face and you felt a little better knowing he was willing to be professional too. 

Peter scurried away, leaving you to tend to your half of the room. Your gaze fell to James’ empty desk beside yours. Alyssa had said she’d asked him to come in…was he really that pissed off? You contemplated sending him a text, telling him things were a little hectic and even if he was mad at you, he should still do his part as a member of this team. But that thought was quickly pushed away when Elijah approached you, your laptop in hand. 

“Hey, Y/N,” he smiled at you, handing you your laptop. 

You thanked him softly, looking at him with worried eyes. “So…how was it? I had Lyss proofread it before, but I’m scared she’s just being nice so—”

“No, no…” he shook his head with a small smile. “It was great, honestly. I don’t think you should change a thing, pretty sure you didn’t even make any grammar mistakes. I loved it, you made all the photos sound so beautiful. I think it’s really great, you know? You didn’t just write about the art, you understood it.”

Your heart melted a bit at his words. It was nice hearing that from someone who you didn’t split rent with, even if you did truly trust Alyssa’s judgment. “Thank you, Elijah. That means a lot.”

“Hey, no problem,” he shook his head, smiling at you. “Good luck with all of…” he glanced around the hectic newsroom, “this. And, truly, great paper Y/N.”

You laughed softly, “Thanks for both those things.”

Elijah just nodded before making his way back to his desk. You looked down at your laptop, biting your lip as you looked at the open word document. Your first front page. Looking up, you glanced around the room to see if anyone needed anything then, when you caught Peter’s eye. 

He strode over to you in a few steps, making you raise a brow. “Need something?”

Peter shook his head, looking a little sheepish, “No, um… is—is that the article?” He pointed to the laptop in your heads.

“Yes…” you spoke slowly, still not grasping his point. 

“Can I read it?”

“What? No,” you said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

“Oh, come on, Ace. Why not? That dude just said it was great! I just wanna see for myself, even though I know it’s amazing. “

You shook your head, looking at him as if he were insane. “No chance, Peter. Now get back to work.”

“Not even a peek?” He gave you those sad puppy dog eyes, the same ones he used to give you those nights you’d kick him off of your fire escape he was begging for just ‘five more minutes’.

You almost wanted to give in, once upon a time you would have, but not now. You wouldn’t. “Not even a peek. You can read it when it’s published, now shoo.”

He sighed dramatically, making you bite back a smile. “You’re so cruel sometimes, Ace.”

You laughed. “Well, suck it up. How’re things going on your side?” Civilized. Professional. It was what you were trying to be despite the underlying tension between you two caused by almost two years of no contact, his sudden arrival, and everything that had happened between the two of you. Most recent being that talk in the park. 

“Oh, it’s good, I think.” He shrugged casually, looking back at his half of the room. “They seem to have a hang on things.”

You held back a laugh, staring at him with a raised brow, “Are you even doing anything or just walking around?”

Peter laughed softly. He was glad he was getting to talk to you like this after everything that had happened. He’d gotten the sense you were avoiding him after that morning in the park. You hadn’t been in the newsroom and he hadn’t seen you walking your usual routes around campus. He knew things weren’t okay, not by a long shot, but this was still a welcome reprieve. 

“Walking around is doing something. If anyone needs help, they can just…holler?”

You do laugh this time. “Holler? Seriously, Peter?”

“Well, I don’t know,” he grinned at you, your laugh making his heart skip a beat. “No one’s asked for help yet, but I’m making myself available to them. That’s what I meant to say.” 

“Alright,” you nodded, still smiling. It still shocked you how the two of you could compartmentalize and work together so well when things were so weird between you. “Well, I should…”

“Actually, I did need your help picking out some photos,” he blurted. He’d felt the conversation coming to a lull, and he didn’t want to stop talking to you just yet. “Just…just wait here.”

Peter held up a finger to you before making his way across the room, grabbing his laptop, and coming back. He pressed a few buttons before holding it out to face you. “I have some photos I need you to choose from. Some from the competition, others just fillers for the other articles and pages.”

“Okay,” you looked at the laptop in his hands before laughing in disbelief. “Oh my god, Peter! You still have this thing? How is it still alive?”

Peter laughed as well. It was true, he’d had that laptop since high school, and it was old back then. The two of you used to watch videos for school together on it and you’d joke that it was on its last breath. He was glad you remembered that. “Hey, no hating on Rusty. He does his job, and he does it well.”

A voice sounded from Peter’s side of the room. “Peter!”

You snorted and rolled your eyes, “Still using that dumb name.”

“It is not dumb.”

“It sounds like something you’d name a dog.”

“If I had a dog, I’d name it something way cooler.”

“Peter!!”

You turned to see who it was, and you saw Ryan waving at the two of you. Your eyes drifted back to Peter. “Um, I think you’re needed.”

“Forget him,” Peter shakes his head, his eyes never leaving yours. He didn’t want to end his short time with you. “He’s annoying, that’s just his thing.”

“Penis Parker!! Yoohoo!”

You laughed in surprise, having not heard that nickname since high school. “You told him about that?” 

Peter held back a groan. “Shit, I’m sorry Ace. Here,” he handed you his laptop, “I already have it pulled up, you just need to pick out what you think works and I’ll deal with the rest. I’ll be right back.” Holding up a finger, he walked away, leaving you with his computer. A second later, you heard his voice a couple feet away, “What the hell was that man?”

You smiled to yourself and took his laptop to your desk, starting to scroll through the photos. You hadn’t seen Peter’s photography in a long time (the competition did not count) and it felt oddly intimate going through his USB drive.

You’d always been a fan of Peter’s photography, not just because you were together, but because it’d always felt like getting a chance of getting to see the world through his eyes. And what an interesting way to see things. Who wouldn’t want to see the world through the eyes of the love of their life—Previous love of their life? 

This was no different, Peter had an accumulation of photos to choose from, both from the competition and not. It seemed he hadn’t just been competing that day. 

Just as you were selecting a few that you’d liked most, his computer crashed out of the file you were in, sending you back to the homepage with a little ‘error:’ notification. 

“Stupid computer,” you mutter, trying to open it back up to no avail. This thing was a piece of junk, you had no idea how he still got any work done on it. 

But just when you were about to call Peter over to reprimand him about his worthless piece of metal he called a computer, your eyes caught sight of file sitting leisurely on his homepage. 

“Ace♠️”

What? You thought Peter only used that nickname for you…if he called other people that, other girls, you were going to be sick. 

Before you could stop yourself, you were clicking on it. 

What you definitely weren’t expecting to see was every article you’d ever written for The Spectator saved. From your first shitty Kent Hall bathroom opening, to your latest one.

Your heart stuttered and your breathing hitched. He didn’t…did he? You clicked on the files, desperate to see when these had all been saved. But they all had different dates. They were either saved close to or the exact date these pieces had been published. Peter had been reading your writing while he was away. 

Your mind briefly wandered to that time you’d run into him outside the photography building, right after he’d gotten back. You’d told him about you getting the front page for the article on the photography competition and he told you he thought all your writing belonged on the front page. When you’d said he hadn’t read any of it, he’d just shook his head and said that wasn’t true. 

You’d just brushed it off and assumed he’d meant when he used to read your essays and projects in high school, but now….

What the fuck did this mean?

“Hey Ace, I’ll be right there!” Peter’s voice snapped you out of your inner turmoil. You clicked out of the file, quickly pulling the photos back up as Peter walked back up to you, standing before your desk ask grinning large. 

“So?” He asked, looking down at you expectantly.

Gaping, you floundered for words. “Uhh…yeah, yeah, mhmm…” you handed him the laptop again, pointing the ones you liked. “I think those—those ones—they should be good.”

“Alright,” he nodded, his eyes fixed on the screen. “Cool, thanks Ace. I’ll start working on those.”

“Mhmm, sure,” you said simply, hoping he’d just go. 

Peter’s eyes flicker up to you, a question in his eyes. “You good, ace?”

Fuck. “Yeah. Are you good, Parker?”

He faltered and made a face as if he were seriously thinking about your question, and it almost made you laugh. “Um…yeah, I think so.”

“Okay, great. Well, now that we’ve got that covered, you wanna go get those photos ready for publishing?”

“Sure, yeah. ‘Course,” he muttered, grabbing his laptop and turning away before he turned back to you again. “One last question, Ace.”

“Hmm?”

“When…when the paper comes out, where can I get a copy?”

“Umm…just about anywhere, really. Any of the libraries, the campus center, residence halls, they’re all over the place. And the digital version, of course…” He obviously knew about that one. 

“Right…okay, thanks.” He shot you an easy smile before walking back to the other side of the room. 

You exhaled slowly, trying to regain your composure. You’d been doing fine, you were focused on getting everything on track, fulfilling the job Alyssa had trusted you with, being professional. But of course, Peter Parker had to ruin that. 

Your eyes flickered back to James’ desk, and you felt a strange twinge in your heart. You had to check up on him, even if the two do you were in an argument. 

Pulling out your phone, you quickly pull up your text thread with him and sent a quick message asking how he was. It wasn’t really early in the day, so when you didn’t get a reply, well, you weren’t exactly worried, he was probably still upset with you and James was known to be petty, but you weren’t brushing it off either. 

So, you opened Instagram. Heading over to James’ profile specifically, you noticed he had something posted on his story. You clicked it and were shown a video of James in a crowded room lit up by strobe lights, chugging two beers at once. 

Of course. Here you were feeling guilty that he was so upset with you and what had happened between you two that he couldn’t bring himself to come in today. But no, in true James fashion, he’d just gotten wasted and was probably passed out in his apartment right now. While you were depending on him, while Alyssa was depending on him. 

You quickly shut off your phone and shoved in back in your bag. As soon as you were finished with your work here, you knew exactly where you were headed next.

You knocked strongly on the door, shifting on your feet as you waited for an answer. After a few moments, a disheveled looking James opened the door. He wasn’t wearing a shirt—just a pair of pajama shorts hung on his hips—and from the way he was rubbing his eyes, you were sure you’d just woken him up. 

“Hey babe,” he murmured, his voice low and raspy in a way that used to bring a smile to your face, but now it only served to irritate you. “What’s up?”

“Have you been asleep till now?” You asked. You tried to keep the irritation out of your voice, but it was hard. 

James only hummed in response, stretching out on his toes, lifting his arms above his head and letting out a soft groan. “Mmm…yeah, I went out with the boys last night. We got wrecked.”

The grin on his face made you scoff. Pushing past him, you stepped into his apartment. You peered through the doorway that led to the living room and saw a friend of his crashed on the couch, one whose name you couldn’t remember. You turned back towards James, who had shut the door and was standing there, as if waiting for you to finish whatever it was that brought you here so he could go back to sleep. 

“You have classes today, don’t you?”

“Eh, it’s fine. I’ll grab the notes from someone else or something.” He brushed you off with a wave of his hand. “Is that why you’re here? To make sure I get to class?”

You might’ve laughed if he hadn’t looked so annoyed. “No, I came over to see why you didn’t come into the paper today.”

James made a face as if that were the most ridiculous thing you could’ve said. “The paper? Seriously, babe?”

“Yes, seriously James. The place was a mess today, we were down like five members and we could’ve really used your help! Alyssa said she asked you to come in.”

“I haven’t checked my phone,” he rolled his eyes, “and besides, I’m sure Lyss will understand—”

“It’s not about Lyss understanding, James. It’s about you being fucking responsible enough to be trusted to do your job. In a position you signed up for, no less.”

“The fuck is your problem Y/N,” he sneered in a way that made you see red. “So I didn’t come in today, whatever.”

“No, it’s not ‘whatever’, James. God…” you ran a hand through your hair and exhaled exasperatedly. Was this really something that warranted an argument? No, not to you. Because James should know his responsibilities, you shouldn’t have to remind him.

“You have responsibilities, James.” You said slowly. The last thing you needed was another argument. 

All you got from that were narrowed eyes in your direction. “Like I need my girlfriend reminding me what the fuck my responsibilities are.”

You didn’t know the word “girlfriend” could be made to sound so close to a slur. “Look James, I’m not trying to be controlling, or annoying—”

“Really?” He rolled his eyes, “well you’re sure succeeding.”

You bit your tongue. Raising your voice right now and arguing wouldn’t do either of you any good, and you wouldn’t be able to get your point across. But hell…you’d be lying if you said you weren’t even a little angry. Normally, you brushed off James’ partying and drinking, he was a college student after all, and just because you weren’t really into that didn’t mean you expected him to be the same. But when it affected his school work, his work on the paper, his relationship with you, and he was being this resilient to change, not even giving you a chance to speak. Yeah, now you had a right to be upset. 

“James, you know I never really care that you want to go party, more power to you. But it isn’t right when you let down the people who were counting on you, when you hurt others and yourself, too. How many times can you miss class before it starts to affect your grade? You just—”

“Oh my fucking god,” he grumbled under his breath, sighing deeply and running a hand through. “You fucking woke me up for this shit? To talk about my ‘grades’ and the fucking paper?”

“Why is it so bad that I wanted your help with something you signed up for?!” you asked in disbelief. 

James shook his head, his gaze fixed on the wall, refusing to meet your eyes. “You’re unbelievable.”

You narrow your eyes at him, wanting to argue, wanting to push back, when you realize…you don’t have to. You didn’t have to constantly go through this with him, over and over, ending one argument just to start another. You didn’t have to roll over and accept the way he was speaking to you. 

A relationship should be a bonus—something that lifts you up, not weighs you down. A person who understood you, respected you, and leveled with you. 

Not… whatever this was. 

You’d been scared to admit it to yourself since Peter came into the picture, you worried how it might look if you chose to end things with James after your ex came back into town.

But the truth was even before Peter came back, there’d been things about James that hadn’t sat right with you. The way he blew off your plans so easily to go hang out with his friends, the way he seemed to want to be upset with you sometimes. It never really felt right, that time during winter break you’d specifically declined meeting his parents and him meeting yours, and he’d showed up at your house anyway, giving you no choice. Sometimes, he just brushed off your opinions or concerns as if your thoughts meant nothing to him. As if you meant nothing. 

Yeah, he’d been charming at first. Complimented your writing. Your looks. Said all the right things. But looking back, that was just it: he’d talked. And once he had you, the effort stopped.

He’d enjoyed the chase, you realized. You’d come to college not expecting, or even wanting, to date anyone after everything that had happened with Peter. And James loved a challenge. 

Well, you weren’t just someone to be caught and forgotten. 

“We’re done.” Not a waver or quiver in your voice.

He blinked. A flicker of confusion cracked his indifference.

“What’d you just say?”

Oh. You realized that he really hadn’t expected you to go there. 

“You heard me,” you said simply, shrugging your shoulder. “If you have anything at my place, I’ll bring it over or have Alyssa do it.” 

You had never really stayed over at his apartment. Strangers always crashing, red flags all over, it made you uncomfortable. You’d told him as much the one and only time he’d ask why you didn’t sleep over, and he’d done nothing to change it. With a small flicker of embarrassment for yourself, you realized you’d never expected him to. In all honesty, you’d never expected much from James at all. Which made the small moments you had, and he’d still managed to let you down all the more recognizable.

James shook his head, a puzzled expression on his face. It almost made you laugh how confused he was. It really wasn’t that unbelievable. “You can’t just do that. You can’t just break up with me.”

“Um…yes I can.” You said simply, stepping back towards the door, your hand falling on the knob.

“Is this about that fucking Parker guy?” He asked, his eyes darkening. Gone was the shock.

But you just rolled your eyes. “No, James, believe it or not, I’m not breaking up with you to get back with Peter. I’m doing it because you’re kind of a piece of shit.” You opened the door. “So rest assured—there’s no ulterior motive. This one’s all on you.”

And with that, you left.

The shopping ban you and your father had bestowed upon your mom didn’t last very long, so it didn’t surprise you when you’d gotten a call from her on Friday telling you’d she’d gotten ‘a cute little bookshelf that would look perfect in your apartment’ and that you should come over to pick it up, and since you’d already be there, you may as well spend the weekend. 

Part of you wondered whether this was just a little scheme she’d conjured up to get you to spend more time at home, but you didn’t really mind. You wanted to get away for a bit.

You hadn’t told anyone about your breakup with James, not yet at least. The only person who knew about it so far was Alyssa. She’d told you that, while she’d absolutely been cheering for you two in the beginning, this was a decision she completely supported and understood.

“He’s been acting like a fucking idiot lately. Honestly, I think you held out too long, Y/N.”

“You’re still his friend too, Lyss.”

“Yeah right, the little fucker was only using me last year to get to you. But at least we got something useful out of him when he helped us move in. From now on, I’m just his editor. Unless…I can always fire him if you want.”

“Alyssa.”

You weren’t sure why exactly you brought it up to anyone. You just didn’t want it to be a big deal where people tiptoed around you and tried to get you to be sad. Because honestly…you weren’t upset, not at all. It felt as if a weight had been lifted off your shoulders, like you’d been blindfolded and put in a strange room, only for the blindfold to fall off and for you to realize you were just outside, walking in a clear, green, flower-filled park. 

Part of you felt bad for feeling so relieved. A bigger part of you couldn’t care less. 

You’d cared for James for a brief moment. There was a small window where he actually felt kind of like a boyfriend. But that didn’t last long, and it didn’t hit you how incompatible you were until you’d left his apartment the other day. James was never the kind of guy you saw yourself with in the long-run, and he wasn’t even that great of a short-run if you were being honest with yourself. 

It was alright the first time he’d come over to your place after a long night of getting wasted with his friends, but after that, it had just started to feel like a chore. You’d help him, but only because you felt obligated to. You were his girlfriend, after all. 

And while you didn’t have much experience in that department, you’d still felt it was kind of your responsibility. You’d helped Peter with plenty of things when the two of you were together. 

But it was different with him, you’d never felt like it was a job you had to fulfill when he’d come home after a particularly bad night, bruised and cut up and you’d bandage him. It didn’t annoy you when the two of you had gone to one of Flash’s house parties and Peter had gotten drunk for the very first time. 

It wasn’t an obligation to help him, to care for him, to love him. You just did. And you hadn’t really realized that not every relationship would be like that until you were with James. Even then, you hadn’t let yourself think that way or compare the two, but now you didn’t care.

You never loved James, not really. Not the way that you had loved Peter. And you knew James had never loved you, not the way Peter had loved you. 

Had.

The thought sent a pang of hurt through your chest.

And then there was the Peter Parker of it all…

You couldn’t deny the fact that part of why you were so reluctant to share the news of yours and James’ separation was because of him. You weren’t sure how he’d react. Or even worse, you had an inkling, and you couldn’t let that happen. 

That morning in the park Peter had more or less admitted that the reason for his transfer was you, and while once upon a time that would’ve thrown you over the moon, not anymore. You couldn’t deny the facts. 

He had left. He had made promises, and he had broken them. 

Him thinking that your breakup with James was the green light he’d been waiting for since he’d gotten there, and just forgetting all the pain and heartbreak he’d caused was something you didn’t want. Not yet, at least. He’d find out soon enough, but you’d cross that bridge when you got to it. 

So now you were back home, watching TV alone, when then was a knock at the door. Standing, you made your way over and opened it without checking the peephole, automatically thinking it was just your parents.

Wrong.

“Hey Ace, how’s it going?” Peter asked with a small smile. The door behind him, the one to his and May’s apartment, was pushed open and the scene, him standing here before you, calling you by that name, in this building where you two had connected, had loved, was so familiar it made everything down to your blood cells stutter in your body. 

How many times had you crossed over this small hallway and into that apartment, how many times had you opened the door to a greeting just like that one? Too many to count, before it had all abruptly come to a stop. 

“It’s going fine. What’s up with you, Parker? You need something?” Your tone is cool, collected, not letting on how hard the nostalgia had just hit you.

“No…no, I’m good, I think. May did ask me to tell you something, though.” Peter shifted on his feet. He was tempted to stick a foot in the doorway just to make sure you wouldn’t slam it in his face.

“Oh? And what's that?” You raised an inquisitive brow at him and watched him stutter. 

“W-well she just—you remember when I said she would love to have you over for dinner? She heard your parents were out and wanted me to ask if you wanted to come over.”

“Really? She wanted you to ask?”

“No…I mean yes! Yes,” he scrunched his eyes shut, shaking his head and looking down, “I don’t know why I said that.”

You glanced down at the watch on your wrist. It was getting late and your parents weren’t back yet, you were sure they’d stop at some restaurant to grab their dinner. And you did miss May…

“I could just order takeout,” you said with a small shrug. “I don’t wanna bother you two or anything.”

Peter’s face fell. “No! No, please. We—I mean, May would really love to have you over. Please?” He added, a little quieter this time.

You shifted on your feet, your hand gripping the door a little tighter. Was this really a good idea?

“I’d have to change out of my pajamas,” you said quietly, gesturing down to yourself, clad in a hoodie and sweatpants. 

“Yeah, that’s fine.” He grinned at you as if that was exactly what he had been hoping you’d say. 

Fighting off a smile, you shut the door and made your way to your bedroom. A simple sweater and jeans would suffice, but you couldn’t help but feel a little nervous. Dinner with Peter and May. That was something you hadn’t had in years. You’d almost forgotten what it entailed. 

When you made your way across the hall, the door was already open a crack. You knocked anyway and heard the unmistakable sound of May Parker. “Come on in, sweetheart! Peter, I told you to leave it open, did you leave it—”

“I swear I left it open, May!”

“Are you sure?”

“He did,” you said softly, padding into their apartment. “I just…thought I’d knock anyway.”

May grinned at the sound of your voice, dropping the small pan in her hand onto the counter before bounding over to you and wrapping her arms around you tight. “Oh, honey, I’ve missed you.”

You grinned, holding her back just as tight, “I’ve missed you too.”

She pulled away, smiling happily, before she turned back toward Peter, who stood to the side, leaning against the counter. “Peter, honey, fridge. Now.”

Your eyes narrowed in confusion and you watched as Peter quickly grabbed a white square shaped box, and carried it to the fridge to store inside.

“Is that…dinner?” You asked, glancing up at May.

“Oh no, honey,” May laughed and placed a hand on your shoulder, leading you to the small table in the corner, one you ate at multiple times. But not for a while now. 

“Come on, take a seat. Peter and I will start bringing things over.”

“Don’t worry, I didn’t let her cook!” Peter called from the other side of the kitchen. 

You brought your hand to your mouth to stifle your laugh, not wanting to hurt May’s feelings, though it was all in good fun and she knew it. 

May walked back into the kitchen, grabbed a towel off the counter and lightly flick it at Peter’s back. He let out an exaggerated yelp, squeezing his eyes shut and bringing his hands up to cover his head. “Mercy! Mercy!”

May rolled her eyes and you let out a soft laugh. You watched them as they worked together, placing the takeout food on plates and bowls before placing them on the table before you. The familiarity was so intense, a longing fulfilled after so much time, it was almost unsettling.

It felt something like a dream when they both sat down at the table. Like a weird sense of déjà vu. But things were different now, Peter had spent two years away, you’d gone to Columbia, and you had a new boyfriend—

No, you didn’t. 

And they didn’t know that. 

You looked down at your plate, reaching for the cup of water they’d placed before you and taking a sip just to have something to do.

“Here honey,” May murmurs, scooping some food onto your plate, “we ordered from that Thai place you love.”

Your heart warmed at her words. “The one with the rice rolls?”

“And the green curry,” Peter finished with a nod. That had always been your order every time you two ate together. 

His eyes were on you, it seemed they had been since you’d set foot in their apartment. But for you, you couldn’t maintain eye contact with him for more than a few seconds before finding something else to look at. It was a little more difficult now that you and James had broken up. Even if Peter didn’t know. 

You had tried to tell yourself it meant nothing, that your breakup with James would’ve happened whether Peter was back or not…and maybe that was a true. It was probably true. But it didn’t change the fact that Peter had almost definitely sped up that process. 

“That’s…that’s, amazing you guys, thank you.” And although your words were intended for a group, your eyes and your smile were for May. 

‘Anytime, sweetheart,” she said with her own smile. “You’re welcome here anytime, you know that. Honestly, you should start coming over more, Peter here has been hounding me day and night to ask you to come ov—”

A loud, forced cough cut through the air and both you and May’s eyes fell on Peter, whose cheeks were turning a pretty shade of pink. 

You eyed him for a moment, watched as he gave May an exasperated look and a shake of his head. You wondered if he thought you wouldn’t notice. 

“Well…” you said softly, turning back to May, “I’ll keep that in mind. Thank you.”

“Oh, anytime honey.” She said with a wide grin. Something told you she had no problem exposing Peter like she had. 

And so the dinner went on, Peter eventually reeling from his earlier embarrassment and joining in on the conversation. It was fun, not that you hadn’t thought it would be, but you hadn’t expected how easy it would be to fall back into old roles, old memories. 

Peter and May made you laugh, you made them laugh. Stories spilled, jokes were made, and you even found yourself joking around with Peter alone. 

It was natural. Too natural, maybe.

At one point, he bumped your foot under the table, and when you looked up, he gave you that crooked grin you hadn’t realized you remembered so well. It did something strange to your chest. Not painful exactly—just... familiar.

May excused herself to get dessert, and for a brief moment, it was just the two of you again.

“You still eat like a kid,” you said, sipping your drink with a smirk.

Peter raised an eyebrow. “Do I?”

“You do. Your side of the table is a mess, and don’t think I didn’t notice you picking out all the carrots on your plate.”

His face went red again. “Okay…I don’t like carrots. But you knew that already.”

It was true, you did know that. In fact, he’d used to pick them out onto your plate because you enjoyed them and you always got on him about being wasteful. 

He smiled, but the moment lingered longer than it should’ve, like they were both waiting for the next unspoken thing. Like they were still suspended in that strange space between what they’d had and whatever this was now.

And it scared you a little, how easy it would be to fall right back in.

“Okay! Peter, will you bring her to the living room?” May’s voice rang out through the apartment. 

“Come on,” Peter stood and held a hand out to you. To both your surprises, you took it. 

He led you to the living room where May stood beside the coffee table, hands clasped together as she grinned at you wide. She made a flourishing gesture with her hands and that was when your eyes fell to the table beside her. 

That white square shaped box you’d seen Peter carrying when you’d first arrived was sitting there, lid open. A cake that read “Congrats on the front page!” lay inside. 

Peter nudged your side. “Congrats, Ace.”

You looked up at him with wide eyes before looking over at May again. “Petey mentioned that your article on the photography competition was on the front page! And your first one ever! Of course, we had to celebrate our girl!”

You smiled at her, your heart absolutely melting at the sweetness of their actions, especially the term ‘our girl.’ You rushed over, pulling her into a hug, which she happily reciprocates. “Thank you,” you murmured softly, “this is so…so sweet. Thank you.”

“Oh, don’t thank me, it was—” she cuts herself off and you pull away just in time to see her eyes fixed over your shoulder before settling on you. “It was no problem, we’re—I’m so proud of you.”

“Where’s Peter’s cake?” You asked, turning back to look at Peter, who still stood where you’d left him, his hand that’d been holding yours briefly was now shoved in his pocket.

“What do you mean, Ace?”

“I mean, you’re the one who won the whole competition, that a pretty big deal. We should celebrate that too.”

You watched his expression soften before he shook his head, walking closer to you with that cocky grin on his face. “Maybe, but your article really brought my piece to life. Maybe you can do a live reading for us—”

“Absolutely not,” you cut him off, shaking your head quickly. 

“No? Well, that’s okay, I’m sure I can find the link for it online…” he trails off, pulling his phone out of his pocket.

Oh. Well, he certainly has a knack for reading my articles online, you thought. 

“Nope,” you said simply, swiping his phone out of his hand before he could protest. 

“Oh, come on,” he said with an enormous grin. “May has been dying to read it, she was really hoping you’d read it aloud for us.”

“I wouldn’t worry about it, you can just lend her one of many copies I’m sure you have in your room.” Or share the link he almost definitely had saved in that old rust bucket he still called a computer. 

Peter’s eyes widened just a fraction before they narrowed at you, and there was no mistaking the flush blooming on his cheeks. “You…I—I don’t have any.”

You look at him with an amused expression. “Peter,” you said slowly, “it was a joke.”

He seemed to let out a breath of relief, and a smile bloomed on his face. “Ha-ha, very funny, Ace.”

May, who’d been watching you both with a smile, thought it might be best if she excused herself for a bit. Just a little while. “Peter,” she gestured to the dessert, “be a dear and cut the girl some cake.”

Peter nodded, quickly moving to grab a plate from the ones she’d set out, and a cake knife. May turned to you with an apologetic smile, “I’m just gonna be one second, dear. I have to make a quick phone call for something to do with the community center, It’s kind of important. I’ll be right back.”

“Oh, don’t worry about it,” you said with a smile, “go ahead. We’ll get your plate ready.”

She gave your cheek a quick peck, pulling away with a smile before heading into her bedroom. You sat back on the couch just as Peter approached with two plates of cake. 

“For the lady,” he murmured as he handed you your plate, falling deep into a bow before falling down beside you as you laughed.

As much as he had hurt you and as easy as it was for him to piss you off, it was becoming clearer and clearer to you since he’d returned; you could never truly hate Peter Parker. 

“Thank you,” you murmured, taking a bite of cake. Your favorite flavor. Of course it was.

“‘Course,” he said simply, shoveling a large forkful of his own piece into his mouth. “You are an award-winning journalist, after all.”

“‘Award-winning?’” You asked with a laugh. “Since when? Do you know something I don’t, Parker?”

He looked at you seriously. “You mean, other than the fact that there is definitely a Pulitzer Prize in your future? No, no, I don’t think I do.”

You rolled your eyes affectionately. Even now, he still had all this faith in you. “So I take it you liked the article?”

“Liked it? Ace, I loved it.”

The complete and utter sincerity was almost enough to bring you to tears, and you had to take another bite of cake to make sure that didn’t happen. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” His tone never wavered, and his eyes never left your face. “and I don’t just mean the part where you’re talking about me or my piece, I mean all of it. The way you described the photos, the art, the visions and messages all those people were trying to share…it was beautiful. I’ve never read anything like it and I think it’s so awesome that this is just the start of what’s going to be a very successful career.”

You chewed on the inside of your cheek, averting your gaze from his. It was just too intense, his words, the eye contact… 

“But, of course, my favorite part was where you spoke about my piece.” He said easily, eat another bite of cake. 

You couldn’t help the loud laugh that escaped you. He always had a knack for comforting you whenever things felt like too much, whether directly or not. “I’m sure it was.”

The two of you fell into comfortable silence and you couldn’t help the small nagging voice in your head. Maybe you shouldn’t say anything…but you really wanted to know…

“Hey,” you said suddenly, bringing your feet up onto the couch and folding them under you as you adjusted your body to face him more, “you remember the other day when we were working on the paper, and you gave me your computer to pick some photos?”

“Mhm,” Peter hummed, looking up at you as he shoved another forkful of cake into his mouth. Frosting coated his lips and the surrounding areas and it was surprisingly hard not to just lean in and kiss it clean. He was adorable. 

You swallowed and looked away, ridding the thought from your head. “Well, your ratchet, dusty old computer—”

“No hating on rusty.”

“—it crashed, and I…I found a file.”

Peter paused. Slowly, he lowered the plate to his lap, leaning over to grab a napkin from the table, wiping his face, before facing you again. “Oh? What kind of file?”

“Porn.” 

You shook your head as soon as the word left your mouth, you and Peter both falling into giggles. “I’m sorry, I'm sorry, that was so lame, but it was right there.”

Peter shook his head, a large grin on his face. “No, totally fair. But I do think that if it were porn, you wouldn’t be bringing this up right now, hm?”

“No, I wouldn’t be,” you said softly, shaking your head.

“So…?”

“Well…the only reason I even clicked it was cause it had my name on it, literally, not some metaphorical bullshit, I just want you to know that.”

He knew, of course. “And?” He asked, still looking at you.

You paused for a moment, letting your eyes trace over his expression. He didn’t seem offended you’d been (not really, but really) snooping, he didn’t seem embarrassed to have been caught. He just looked…normal, as if to say, “what else did you expect?”

“And…you were keeping up with my writing? While you were away?”

“Is that a question, Ace? I thought you saw the file?”

“No…no, I saw. And I always saw that they were each downloaded pretty close to the day they were released.”

“Well, forgive me for keeping up with my favorite writer,” he teased, but his voice was soft. Sincere. 

You didn’t know what to say, didn’t know how to respond to that. So you inhaled through your nose and sat back against the couch, facing the TV. You could feel Peter beside you doing the same.

“It wasn’t that difficult finding them, you know. They’re one of the top searches when someone searches your name.”

“Oh…I didn’t know that.” You mused quietly. So he’d googled you.

“Did you ever…I don’t know, look me up?”

Easy answer. 

“No.” You said bluntly

The two of you turned at the same time, meeting each other’s eyes before bursting into laughs. 

When you’d calmed down a bit, you looked back over at him. “Why? What would I have found?”

“Oh, nothing worthwhile.” He’d answered too easily. And you knew that wasn’t true. It seemed you had plans for tonight. 

“Oh, I’m sure.” You said with a small eye roll, taking another bite of cake. 

“I meant it, you know,” he said softly, his eyes never leaving your face. “You are my favorite writer.”

Your heart skipped a beat. “I’m not sure you read enough for that claim to have any weight behind it.”

Peter just grinned, “Oh, but I mean it, Ace.”

Of course he did. 

“Thank you,” you murmured quietly. 

“You don’t need to thank me, I’ve always thought your writing was—”

“That’s not what I meant. I was talking about this,” you gestured to the cake, the frosting message that’d been written on it cut off due to the missing slices. “It was…really sweet of you, thank you.”

Peter was quiet for once, taking a moment before he spoke up again. “You…you already thanked May.”

“Yeah,” you nodded, “but I didn’t thank you. And I know it was your idea.”

He paused, his eyes fixed on his lap, and this time, you were the one who kept your eyes on him. After a few moments, he looked up. “That obvious?”

You scrunched up your nose and nodded. “Little bit, yeah.”

He laughed softly. “Well, you can’t blame me. It absolutely is worth celebrating. And you never mentioned having plans or something with James or Lyss, or anyone else, so I…”

You swallowed hard at the mention of James, but you couldn’t help the way your heart fluttered at his words. If anyone knew how much this meant to you, it was Peter. “Well, it means a lot, really.”

“You know, despite the fact that we aren’t…you know,” he swallowed hard, as if it physically hurt him to say that, “but we were friends first, and I remember. I know how hard you’ve worked for this, how much you’ve wanted it. And I’m glad to be here for it.”

“I’m…I’m glad you’re here too.” Barely a whisper, but so much more. The kindest words you’d given him since he’d return. Not forgiveness, no, it’d take a lot more to get there, but an acknowledgement. An appreciation of your friendship before everything, the connection you two shared, one you’d probably never find with anyone else. 

His gaze never faltered from yours and you could tell by the look on his face how much your words had effected him. His eyes were like two windows into that mind you used to know like the back of your hand. And, sometimes, you thought you still could. 

Which was why you leaned away and cleared your throat. Your eyes fell to the empty plate in his hands. “Um…do you want me to get you another slice?”

He looked down at the plate in his hands as if just realizing it was there. Shaking his head, he reached for your plate as well, “Don’t worry about it, you’re the guest of honor. I can get it.” 

As he leaned over to reach the cake, he caught sight of the untouched plate he’d gotten ready for his aunt. With furrowed brows, he looked back at you over his shoulder. “Hey, where’d May run off to?”

“Oh,” you waved a hand, “said she had to call someone or something for the community center. She went into her room.”

Peter gave you a quizzical look, making you raise a brow at him. “What?” You asked.

“Her phone’s right there, Ace.” He pointed to the edge of the coffee table where, sure enough, May’s phone sat tauntingly.

Your mouth fell open in disbelief and your eyes flicked to her closed bedroom door. That little…

“Liar,” you hissed, making Peter laugh. “She said it was important!”

“I’m sure she thinks whatever’s going on out here is more important.” He snickered. 

“Not funny, Peter!”

“You know,” he mused thoughtfully, “this might be the only time she’s ever happily left us alone.”

You flushed at the thought. It was true, when the two of you had been together, both your parents and May had made the rules about hanging out way stricter, and they’d always been lurking around, never leaving the two of you alone and out of sight for long.

“I wonder if she—”

The sound of a door opening cut Peter off, making both your heads turn. May stood there grinning widely. 

“Hey! Sorry, these people are so incompetent. I mean, how hard is it to understand where to leave an order, am I right? Did you save me some cake?”

You and Peter exchanged a glance before erupting into laughter. 

Contrary to popular belief, being Spider-Man was a stress reliever for Peter. Of course, it had its more than stressful moments. But often times when things were getting rough in his personal life he held onto the fact that he got to swing around the city (North Carolina was fine, but it was nothing compared to New York) and help the people who needed him. It felt good to be needed. 

Nothing quite beat the feeling he got when he returned a lost child to his terribly worried parents, or when he helped rescue a girl who was stuck in burning building, her father waiting for her eagerly down on the street. It often times made him wonder how he would feel if it were his loved ones in peril. If it were Ned, or MJ, or May. Or you. 

He never thought he’d have to find out. 

Until today. 

It was like any other day, and when he thought about that later it would make him sick to his stomach how something so terrible could happen and the world would go on. How there would be no signs. 

He had been swinging around downtown Manhattan. It was a peaceful afternoon in New York, full of people just bustling around as they enjoyed the nice weather, and Peter was still riding the high of dinner with you last night. How it’d felt like the two of you had really connected, like he might just have a shot at earning your forgiveness. He kept thinking about how good it felt to have you back at his place with him and May, how natural it was. 

Maybe he was too stuck in his head, daydreaming and reminiscing, and that was the problem.

Early evening traffic was just beginning, the roads and crosswalks full of people trying to get back to their homes. 

He should’ve been faster.

He should’ve noticed it sooner. Something. Anything.  

Shooting a web toward the nearest lamppost, Peter hauled himself onto a low, nearby roof and crouched on the edge. “So Karen, what’ve we got today?”

“There seems to be some commotion on the Brooklyn Bridge, cars are piling up. Cause of commotion is unknown.”

Peter’s brows furrowed and he was immediately springing into action. Bridges were a terrible place for accidents to take place, they were crowded, and far too many times he’d saved someone from sliding past the broken railings and into the waters. 

Sure enough, when he got there Peter could see that this was no exception. The bridge was packed, overflowing with vehicles and people rushing out of their cars. It was worse than the usually New York traffic. He swung down quickly, planting himself on the ground with the others and started ushering them out quickly.

“This way ma’am….It’s alright sir, just keep walking….Oh, buddy,” there was a kid cowering in an all too familiar way behind a car, so Peter reached out a hand, watching as the kid looking up at him, something like awe shining in his wide eyes. When he’d grabbed hold of Peter’s hand, he gently pulled him over and lifted him up onto his shoulders. “You see anyone you know?”

The little boy looked around, unsure, before his face lit up and he was pointing eagerly. “O-over there! My dad!”

“Alright,” Peter huffed, fighting his way through the crowd to the panicked looking man who was stock-still in the feverish crowd. 

“Dad! Dad!” The kid waved his arms frantically, and somehow over all the ruckus, the man heard him. Peter could see the relief flooding his face as he raced over to the two of them, reaching up and scooping the little boy into his arms. “Daddy! Spider-Man saved me!”

'Thank you so much,” the father’s voice was choked and Peter merely shook his head.

“It’s what I do, sir. And you, kiddo,” Peter leaned down to the little boy, “stick with your dad, yeah?”

The kid nodded quickly and Peter ruffled his hair before shooting a web and lifting himself onto the tower of the bridge, he still hadn’t seen what all the ruckus was about…

It was obvious what the ruckus was all about. There had been a pile up at the end of the bridge and from what he could see, it was bad. At least four cars were completely flipped over, another was on fire, and…no. 

No no no.

He knew that car, and worse, who was most definitely in it. He should’ve realized it sooner, the whole reason you were back in Queens for the weekend was to pick up some furniture to bring back to your apartment. You’d told him you were going to be driving back to school. He should’ve known, should’ve realized.

But now he was watching your car hang off the broken railing. The sight made every single cell in his body freeze for a split second. Were you still in it? Had you gotten out like some of the other civilians? He wasn’t going to wait around to find out. 

Peter flung out his wrist, hauling himself over as quickly as he could. He stopped beside the car and he could see you clearly through the window, your eyes shut, head laying on the steering wheel, blood dripping from your hairline. 

Peter was going to be sick. 

He had to get himself together. But just as he was snapping himself out of his fight, flight, or freeze (where he was currently frozen) moment, the car that had been up in flames blew up, sending your car flying off the rail, Peter close behind you.

“No!” He shot one web and caught himself before flinging his other hand towards your car, his web sticking to the bumper. He lifted himself up before bracing his feet on the concrete and pulling you up with every ounce of strength in his body. 

He was panting by the time he had your car planted back on the road, but he didn’t feel tired at all. The exact opposite. He rushed over to the drivers’ side and yanked the door open. You were still there, limp in the car seat, and the blood around your hairline was more than he remembered it, dripping down onto your cheek. He winced at the thought that he might’ve had something to do with that. 

“Ace, honey, can you hear me?” He leaned in, hovering over you, and patted your cheek. “Baby come on, open those pretty eyes for me.” It wasn’t until he went to wrap an arm around your waist so he could pull you out did he notice the awkward angle at which your arm was bent. 

Peter hissed at the sight. He hated seeing you so broken, so hurt. This wasn’t how you were supposed to be. You were supposed to be rolling your eyes at him, making fun of him for everything he did, not this. 

“C’mon Ace, just tell me you can hear. Give me something sweetheart.” He kept murmuring words in your ear as he slowly worked you out of your seatbelt and lifted you carefully, mindful of your injuries. 

“Hey!” Peter kept an arm around your waist as he waved the other around at the paramedics who were starting to flood the scene.

Two middle aged men rolled over a gurney and quickly got you out of Peter’s hold. He knew it was the right thing to do but it almost made him angry. He needed to hold you, to make sure you were there. But you needed help right now, and that was more important than anything. 

So he let you go, trailing after the two men. “She hit her head, pretty sure she’s got a concussion. Something’s wrong with her arm too.”

“Thank you for your help,” one of the medics said to him, “we’ll take it from here.”

But he didn’t go. Peter followed them as they rolled you into the ambulance, desperately wanting to just step in and stay by your side.

“Is she going to be okay?” He asked quietly. 

The medic turned to look at him, as if surprised he was still there, and he knew why. If this were anyone else, Peter would’ve just trusted the medics and swung away to see where else he was needed. But this wasn’t just anyone. 

This was you. 

The love of his life. 

The first thing he thought about when he woke up and the last thing before he slept, and in all the in-between moments. The only person he saw a future with. The person whose forgiveness he still had to earn. And you were unconscious in the back of an ambulance. 

So he wasn’t leaving, not yet. Not until they slammed the doors in his face and drove off. 

“We’ll do what we can,” the man said to him seriously. Peter recognized it for what it was, a carefully worded non-answer. They still didn’t know the full extent of your injuries and they weren’t about to give him false hope. 

Peter stood there silently as the medic slammed the back doors of the ambulance shut, catching one more glimpse at your face. The ambulance drove off, sirens blaring, and it took him a few minutes to fully gather himself. 

He had to finish his job here, if anything, so he could make it back to you faster. 

The next hour or so was hell for Peter. He’d had to stick around and help sort out the mess on the bridge when all he really wanted to do was get in that ambulance with you and follow you to the hospital and everywhere after that. 

He’d never felt so obligated to help people before, it was just something he’d always done, something he was happy to do. But not now. Every person, every accident, was just something holding him back from finally rushing over to that hospital to see you. 

But finally, it was over. People were safe again, all the injured had been helped out or taken by paramedics if it was severe, police were trying to figure out how to clear the scene. His job as Spider-Man was over for now. He finally got to be Peter Parker. 

The trip to the hospital was a blur for him. He was swinging furiously, only stopping in a deserted alleyway to change out of his suit before he was running through those doors. He found a nurse who he begged pretty pathetically to let him see you. Fortunately, she was kind enough to look you up in the system. Unfortunately, he couldn’t see you just yet. 

So now, Peter was sitting anxiously in a waiting room, waiting for any news that might come of you. He’d called May and both your parents to tell them what had happened (leaving out the Spider-Man part when he was speaking to your parents). He’d even called Alyssa, whose number he’d had to get from one of the photographers from the paper. 

But it didn’t take long for him to finish off with the phone calls, leaving him alone with his thoughts. And so the spiral started. He didn’t know how badly you were hurt. What if it was worse than what he could see back on the bridge? What if you were permanently hurt? Or worse...

No. He couldn’t go down that road. That was never going to happen, he wouldn’t let it. He didn’t care what he had to do. Hell, he’d give you his heart if you needed it. Just as long as you were okay. 

There was still so much left unsaid between you two, so much he regretted. That morning in the park had barely scratched the surface of it all. He had to tell you about all the horrible parties his roommate had dragged him to, all the jokes and stories he’d made sure to try to remember just so he could share them with you the next time he saw you, all the new constellations he’d spent hours reading about just in hopes of sharing them with you when he saw you again. 

Peter had no clue how long he’d spent sitting in that waiting room, his leg bouncing up and down quickly. If you’d asked him, he would’ve said over ten hours, for sure. Realistically, he knew that wasn’t true. But that was how long it felt until that sweet old nurse was walking up to him again.

He stood as soon as he caught sight of her, anxiously wringing his hands. “How is she? Is she alright? Is she awake, can I see her?”

The nurse shot him a small smile, “She’s gonna be just fine. Poor thing’s a little beat up, but everything should heal over time. She’s not awake, she’s on a lot of medication, but you can see her if you’d like.”

Peter almost felt to the ground in relief. He nodded so quickly he was almost surprised his head didn’t snap off. “Yes, please. Where is she?”

“Just down there,” she pointed down the hall. “Second door on the right.”

He was walking off before she’d even finished talking. He didn’t want to be rude, truly, but all he cared about was seeing you. He reached the door to your room and slowly pushed it open. 

The first thing that hit him was the smell, the reek of antiseptic was so strong his nostrils burned. 

And then he saw you.

Maybe he should’ve waited a little longer. This…this was like a knife to the heart. 

He’d never seen you look so frail, so fragile. Your skin was so much paler than normal, missing that usual glow you always carried around, one he loved. A large white bandage covered your hairline where he’d seen all that blood earlier, and he could already see some redness where it was starting to seep through. The machines and tubes around you made you look smaller, the endless beeping of the heart monitor was both reassuring and taunting at the same time. 

Reassuring because he’d gotten to you in time, you were alive. 

Taunting because he couldn’t have stopped you from getting hurt in the first place. 

He could see your arm wrapped up in a cast and the sight broke his heart his heart all over again. Taking a step, he managed to get his legs working enough to make his way towards a seat beside your bed. 

“Hey Ace,” he murmured, taking your other hand and bringing it up to his lips to press a soft kiss to your knuckles. He knew of course that you couldn’t hear him, but that didn’t matter. 

“I’m so sorry, honey. I wish I could’ve helped you sooner, that I could’ve gotten there sooner.” Peter bowed his head and sniffled. He hadn’t gotten a chance to take all of this in seriously. You could’ve died. 

“I’m sorry for everything, Ace. Not just today. Everything. I’ve been such an asshole but I swear to you, I promise that if you give me a chance, I’m gonna make it all up to you. Even if you have a boyfriend, I—”

“Who has a boyfriend?”

Peter’s head shot up in surprise when he heard your raspy voice. Your eyes were half-shut, squinting against the bright light of the hospital room. He sat up straighter and gave your hand a gentle squeeze. “Hey Ace, how ya feeling?”

You grimaced and shook your head. “Weird.”

He smiled at that. The nurse had told him you were on some heavy medication and he could clearly tell. “Yeah, I bet. You got in a little accident honey.”

Turning your head on the pillow, you looked over at him with wide, hazy eyes. He hadn’t realize just how exhausted you looked, but right then, it was all he could see. “It was s-so scary, Petey. T-there was a…a car, and it hit my car, then something else hit my car, a-and—“

“Shh,” he murmured softly, reaching up to brush a stray strand of hair out of your face. His fingers lingered on your face, tracing the skin where he’d seen blood earlier. If he had to hear how scared you were he was scared he would vomit. “It’s alright, Ace. You’re okay and that’s all that matters right now. I got you out, you’re okay. The doctors are gonna help you, okay? And I’m gonna be right here the whole time.”

You shut your eyes and nodded, leaning into touch and he almost wanted to cry. He knew you would never be acting like this under any other circumstance, but god was he loving it, despite the horrible circumstances that brought you here. 

“Thank you Petey,” the nickname made his heart skip a beat, “and your boyfriend too.”

That made his brows furrow. “Sweetheart…what do you mean?”

“Your boyfriend,” you said simply, your eyes still shut. He watched the way your lashes brushed against your cheek. It reminded him of when you used to fall asleep during your study sessions, you always looked so peaceful he couldn’t never bring himself to wake you, something you always berated him on. “You were just talking about him.”

Oh. “I wasn’t talking about my boyfriend, Ace. I was talking about yours.”

You raised your eyebrows suspiciously and while the topic of James always brought a scowl to his face, he couldn’t help but chuckle softly at your little attitude. Until you said something.

“You’re so silly Petey, I don’t have a boyfriend.”

The drugs must’ve really been getting to you. “Yeah, you do Ace. Tall, blonde, and annoying as hell. I believe he goes by James.” Peter couldn’t stop the little roll of his eyes. 

“Oh him,” you blew a raspberry and waved your hand as if you were trying to brush off the whole topic. “He’s a dummy.”

Peter couldn’t help but laugh at your little proclamation. “Well, I can’t argue with that, sweetheart.”

“But he’s not my boyfriend.” You said with a small shrug, shifting on the bed.

Peter paused. What?

“I think you’re still feeling a little tired sweetheart, you had a long day. Why don’t you try to sleep some more-“

“Nuh uh,” you said defensively, your brows furrowing together in a way that made him wince considering your definitely-there-concussion. “I don’t have a boyfriend, Petey. M’not a liar!”

“I never said you are, Ace.” He assured you gently, placing a hand on your shoulder in an attempt to soothe you. Peter wasn’t a doctor or anything but he figured it probably wasn’t great to get you all worked up in this sort of state. “Don’t worry about it, darling. Forget I even brought it up, alright? I believe you. Just try to get some rest for now.”

That seems to please you and you nuzzle your head back into the pillow.

Now...he knows he should leave you. He knows that you’re hurt, that there’s so many drugs in your system to help you with the pain, pain and trauma that you haven’t even had time to process.

And yet…

“Hey Ace?” He asked gently, leaning forward in his chair a bit. He just felt this urge to be as close to you as possible. If it weren’t for all your injuries he’d already have crawled into the hospital bed and held you so close to his chest, you wouldn’t be able to tell where he began and where you ended. 

That had been the dream. Always. When he’d had you and every goddamn day since he’d lost you.

“Hmm?” You hummed so softly, so sweetly, that all he wanted to do was lean down, kiss your forehead and tell you to rest. And he absolutely would, but he just had one question. 

Peter was a curious man. It was part of what made him such a great scientist. “Is there…a reason you’re saying you don’t have a boyfriend, sweetheart? Did something happen between you and James?”

“Well duh,” you giggled softly and rolled your eyes as if you couldn’t believe he was even asking this. His curiosity was only piqued. 

“Y-yeah?” Peter shifted in his chair, spreading his legs as he leaned closer, his elbow digging into his knee as propped his chin on his fist. He really didn’t want to come off as eager as he felt but there was no hiding the happy glint in his eyes. “Like what?”

Your eyes shifted around as if searching for the answer. “I don’t know if can tell you…”

That made his brows furrow. “Well why not, Ace? You know you can tell me anything.”

“Right, but…” Now you were the confused one., “I’m not supposed to tell you.”

“Did James tell you that? That you can’t tell me?”

“No…” you shook your head slowly. “Nope, not him. Me.”

“You…?” He asked quietly. He couldn’t lie, it hurt. Knowing that there was something you’d been purposefully hiding from him, so much so that you remembered you weren’t supposed to tell him, even in this state. Especially something concerning this. 

“Oh, don’t be sad Petey,” you said quickly when you noticed his downfallen expression. “I’m sorry. I’ll tell you if you want!”

It was just like you of course, trying to cheer him up. He couldn’t imagine you’d be acting the same if you were completely sober, though. 

“I broke up with him.” And you said it so casually, your face completely relaxed, as if you had no idea how much those words meant to Peter. 

Now, he wasn’t naive enough to imagine that your breaking up with James meant he could be with you now. No, it didn’t work like that. But… this was a step. 

“Why’s that, Ace?” He had to be normal, he had to act like his heart wasn’t about to beat out of his chest, like his hands weren’t aching to be holding yours. 

“He’s a dummy,” you repeated as if it were obvious. And it was, Peter agreed of course. But there still had to be more. 

“Right, of course he is Ace, you’re so right. When did you… break up?” He couldn’t lie, he felt like at any second you’d snap of out this drug-happy-haze you were in, realize he was kind of sort of grilling for information on your (past?) relationship, and make him leave. But he just wanted to know a bit more. 

“Oh…pffft…” You laid back on the bed and blew a raspberry. “Like forever ago, Petey.”

What in the world? “Forever ago? Wow, that must be a long time ago, Ace.”

“Yeah,” you let out a heavy sigh and shut your eyes. “S’so long ago… that day we were running the paper.”

“What?!”

Oh. 

Oh.  

But that would mean… That day was over a week ago. He’d been you plenty of times since then. That dinner with him and May, all those small moments between you two… you were already single. 

“That…that long, Ace?” He was glad you weren’t fully aware, it meant you wouldn’t notice how choked he sounded. 

You didn’t really reply, just made some sort of soft, sighing noise as you lay back against the pillow and shut your head. Peter breathed deeply, bringing your hand up to his lips and pressing a soft kiss to the back of it. 

He stayed there for a while, watching you sleep, his mind spinning from everything that had happened today. Last night had been amazing, the best time he’d had since he’d gotten back. Staring at you now, injured, drugged out, and laying in a hospital bed really put into perspective for him how quickly things could change. 

How much he needed you in his life. And not just as a friend. 

Peter was stuck there, stewing in his thoughts and doubts and everything ever when the door to your room was gently pushed open, revealed a worried-looking Alyssa. He stood, clearing his throat as she bounded in, eyes wide, hands clutching at her phone so tightly her knuckles were white. It seemed she’d been the closest of everyone he’d called.

“How is she?” She asked Peter worriedly, trying to keep her voice down for your sake.

“She’s…she’s gonna be okay.” Her sigh of relief resonated deeply with him. “But she is pretty banged up.”

“Yeah, I can see that,” she murmured gently, her eyes traced over your figure with deep sympathy. Peter did the same, and every second felt like his own personal hell. 

Alyssa turned to him with a puzzled look. “How’d you know about the accident? And how’d you get here so quick?”

Shit. “Oh, umm…I commute, so I was on the bridge as well, but nowhere near the accident like she was. When I saw the paramedics wheeling her to the ambulance…I went with them.” Enough of the truth. 

She nodded, looking back down at you, her fingers gently brushing some hair out of your face. “Well it’s good she had someone with her, even if she didn’t know it. And even if it was you.”

Ouch. He tried not to take it to heart though, he knew she was just looking out for you. “Yeah,” he murmured, “my thoughts exactly.”

“Im sorry, Peter,” Alyssa sighed and turned toward him. “I’m not trying to be a bitch, really. I appreciate your help, and I’m sure she does too.”

He shook his head, waving off her apology. “Don’t worry about it. I understand.”

Alyssa just sighed again and started pacing the room. “She did not deserve this.” He couldn’t agree more. “Do you know all that’s wrong with her? What’d her doctors say?”

Peter shook his head again. “No, they made me wait in the waiting room, later on a nurse came and told me I could see her but she wasn’t conscious. Honestly, I thought I was lucky that they even let me in so I thought I’d just wait for her parents to get here and get the full story from them. I called them, they be be here any—”

That wasn’t enough for her, apparently. Peter watched as Alyssa completely ignored him and made her way to your bedside, grabbing at the clipboard there and scanning them. 

“I…didn’t know you were pre-med.”

“M’not,” she brushed him off with a wave of her hand, her eyes never leaving the piece of paper.

Peter paused. “Well then…what’re you doing.”

“I went out with this dude who was pre-med. A total bore and a total pain, but I did learn a few things.”

“Yeah?” He asked, stepping up closer to her and looking over her shoulder as if the medical jargon would suddenly start making sense to him as well. “What can you make out of that?”

“Broken arm, obviously…she’s got a concussion, some internal bleeding, and a fracture in her right rib.”

Peter winced as she went on, his heart aching at the thought of you going through all that pain. 

“You said you called her parents?” Alyssa asked quietly. And when Peter looked over at her, he noticed her nose was tinged red, and her eyes as well.

“I did, yeah. Right before I called you.”

She nodded, pursing her lips. Quietly, she made her way to the chair he’d been sitting in earlier. “Is there…is there anything we can do?” She whispered. 

Peter wanted to tell her that if there was, he’d probably already done it by now. But he understood exactly what she meant and that wouldn’t help right now. “Be here. Help her. She still doesn’t fully understand what happened, I don’t think. She woke up a bit ago when I first came in, she was high as a kite so she probably won’t remember it. But she told me how scared she was, how scary the whole situation was.

“So…to answer your question, I think the best thing we can do for her is be there. Here in the hospital, and out there when she’s discharged.”

Alyssa nodded. He could see the tears swimming in her eyes, but he could almost see the spark behind them, the sheer determination to be there for her friend in every way she possibly could. 

Peter liked her. 

He looked back at you, unsure if the paleness of your skin was because of the bright, hospital fluorescents, or all the pain you’d been through today. 

“We’ll be there for her.” Alyssa said firmly and Peter appreciated the use of “we”.

“We will,” he nodded, his eyes never leaving your form. 

Thank you so much for helping, if you have any questions just let me know!

Alyssa’s text shone through Peter’s phone screen as he made his way around your apartment. It took everything in him to leave your side, but your parents had shown up and you needed some of your things. So he decided to make himself useful and also give your mom and dad the space to freak out about you. 

Your apartment was cozy, he thought as he walked around. It wasn’t that hard to find the small touches in the cramped space that were more you over Alyssa. Mugs with cute designs on them, a throw blanket that he recognized as the same one you used to take out with you on the fire escape and cuddle with as you waited for him to finish patrol. Sometimes you’d even take it with you when he used to swing you both to that old hill where you’d stargaze. He smiled to himself at the memory, there hadn’t been a day that went by since graduation where he hadn’t thought of those moments with you, or a night where he didn’t look up to the sky, stars visible or not, and missed you immeasurably. 

He realized that the reminiscing probably wasn’t the best thing to do right now while you were laying in the hospital waiting for him to get back with your things. He made his way to your bedroom, his heart melting even more as he stepped inside. If he thought the apartment was you, he wasn’t ready for your room. It was like stepping into a time machine and he was back with you at your old apartment, the two of you trying and failing to keep quiet so your parents don’t wake up to find you together in the middle of the night. There were papers, notebooks and pens strewn on the floor and he could practically see you hunched over, brows furrowed as you scribbled furiously, trying not to miss any thought. 

But there were some differences now. There were pictures, ones he didn’t recognize, pictures he wasn’t a part of anymore. Some of you and Alyssa, some with MJ, one on your nightstand with you and James that made him scoff quietly and roll his eyes. The thought of that guy alone was almost enough to make him physically gag. How could you ever think he was right for you? Well, you didn’t apparently, not anymore at least. He had to gauge more information from you about that, preferably when you weren’t drugged up or laying in a hospital bed. 

So he walked around your room slowly, trying to figure out what would be useful. He grabbed a pair of fuzzy socks, your phone charger, and your headphones. They doctor had said they weren’t sure how long they needed to keep you there just yet, but Peter wasn’t going to be unprepared or have you feeling anymore uncomfortable than you most likely already were. 

So he walked over to your closet, he wanted to grab a few things he knew you’d appreciate. He grabbed an empty tote bag of yours to fill up. He grabbed a few sweaters and cardigans because he knew you got cold easily and he imagined sterile hospital rooms didn’t help with that. He was rummaging around through the small shelf where you had your sweatpants, trying to decide which one seemed the comfiest when his hand pressed against something hard, making a small rustling sound. 

Confused, he pushed away the clothes covering whatever it was you had hidden in your closet, and he was met with a small, square-shaped gift. He would’ve left it, really, the last thing he wanted to do as he was gathering things to take back to the hospital where you lay injured was snoop in your room. But his eyes caught sight of something. The tag. 

Merry Christmas Petey ♡︎

Your familiar scrawl stared back at him tauntingly, making him wonder when you could’ve ever possibly gotten him a Christmas gift—

Winter break. That damned winter break where he was supposed to see you, but everything had gone wrong. He’d chickened out at the last minute. He knew he shouldn’t, knew he had no right to open this even if it had been originally bought for him. But Peter had always been too curious for his own good.

With his heart in his throat, he pulled the wrapping off slowly. He pulled out the box, a small smile on his lips when he saw the “LEGO” label on the top right corner. But his smile fell when he noticed what set you’d gotten for him. 

Map of Constellations. 

Oh. It was perfect. 

And he was the whole reason he’d never gotten it in the first place. 

Peter felt… well, he wasn’t really sure what he felt. Guilt, definitely. Touched, obviously. But regret. God, he could just picture you when you’d gotten that text from him two winters ago… of course you hated his guts. 

He realized he owed you an explanation. Whether you spit on his face and told him to never speak to you again, or you accepted it with that icy, close-off demeanor, he owed it to you. He’d left you in the dark for so long about what he was thinking, all the reasons and he’d conjured up. The two of you had never worked like that, especially him. No, you were always the one person he could trust, the one person who he turned to for every thing. 

Peter was a terrible secret keeping in general, but especially with you. Something in him just wanted to surrender to you, tell you everything little secret, every single thought. He hadn’t let that part of him win over in a while. 

Maybe it was finally time it did.

With his heart in his throat, he returned the Lego set to the back of your of your closet, the torn wrapping paper resting around it, its edges being held down by the box. But if you were to pick it up, it’d fall off, and you’d easily be able to tell someone had been there and opened it. 

Great, now not only did he feel guilty about letting you get hurt when he was literally the hero of the city, but he felt even more guilty for snooping. But you’d forgive him…right?

Maybe he could get even with you after finding that file on his laptop. But he wasn’t upset about that at all, actually. He loved that you knew he’d thought of you while he was away, that he kept up with your achievements and he cared about them. 

He closed your closet and packed a few more things before standing in your doorway, giving the room one final look, trying to decide if he’d forgotten anything. His eyes fell on the picture on your nightstand, the one that depicted you and James. You were both smiling wide, James’ long arm hovering over you and holding up the camera to capture the picture

In a few quick strides Peter was back in the room, grabbing the picture frame and lowering it face down onto the table. He didn’t think you’d appreciate coming home after everything you’d been through and having a photo of your ex great you as soon as you stepped into your room. 

Yeah…yeah, thats why he’d done it. For you. Duh. 

Pleased with himself, Peter stepped out of your room and out of the apartment altogether, a smile tugging at his lips and he carried your filled-to-the-brim tote bag. 

Walking through the bright-white hospital hallways, Peter could make out several different noises. A beep…beep…beep… of someone’s heart monitor, the squeaking of un-oiled cart wheels as they scraped along the tile floor, phones ringing at every nurse’s station that he passed, and chatter. Chatter from doctors and nurses alike as they moved in and out of patient’s rooms, chatter from others who were visitors just like him. Honestly, it would’ve been a little overwhelming for him, even though he had much better control over his senses than he did in high school, it was still a lot. 

But he was going to see you and you… well, you always had a way of calming him down. 

You’d been here for close to a week now, your recovery going extremely well, and Peter had come in every single day without fail. There no sign of James—or whether he knew you were injured or not—and you never mentioned him. There was some hushed conversation between you and Lyss a few days ago (he hadn’t been actively trying to eavesdrop, but he had sharp senses and it just happened) where he’d heard you tell her you were pretty sure you’d told him about the breakup while you were kind-of-sort-of out of it. Lyss had just laughed as if it totally checked. 

That was another thing that had sort of developed during your stay here. His (sort of) friendship with Alyssa. They’d bonded over their desire to help you and be there for you after everything you’d been through. She hadn’t once threatened to fire him from the paper, so all in all, Peter thought he was doing good.

He waved to a few of the nurses he’d become familiar with during your time here as he made his way to your room. So far, much to his eager excitement, you hadn’t kicked him out yet any of the times he’d come to visit. Sometimes he stayed in a chair beside you, old laptop in his lap while he pretended to be working on something for school or the paper. Of course, he wanted all his attention to be solely on you, but he had a feeling you’d respond to him better if he was (pretending) being productive. You didn’t really speak to him other than answering the same question he asked every day, “How’re you feeling, Ace?”, to which you would answer “Good”, despite laying injured in a hospital bed.

He figured now wasn’t the best time to be hounding you about talking about everything, not when you were still going through it. He could protest for details later. There was a silent agreement between the two of you. He never pushed, and you let him worry. Silently. Because let’s be honest, you both knew exactly why he was by your side every free second he could get and then some. But you never asked him to leave. Maybe that meant something. 

Or maybe not. 

When he reached your door, it was open, and the bed was empty. Huh… maybe you’d gone to get more tests done? 

That was exactly what he would’ve believed, and he would’ve sat in a chair waiting for you, if a nurse hadn’t seen him and taken some pity on him. 

“She’s not here anymore,” the voice was familiar, and when Peter whipped around, he recognized her as the same, short old lady who had spoken to him when he’d been a mess in the waiting room the same day you’d been admitted. 

“What do you mean?” Peter’s brows furrowed in confusion. Had they transferred you? But that wouldn’t make sense. 

“She checked herself out not too long ago, you just missed her, actually.” The nurse informed him with a sad smile. 

“Wait…” he shook his head quickly, his heart racing, “no, no. She can’t do that, she’s still hurt. She hasn’t been here long enough.”

She simply shrugged. “Her doctors cleared her, and she jumped at the chance to get out. She is definitely going to have some outpatient recovery, which we’ve already discussed. She was informed to take it easy, however. I trust you’ll be the one to make sure she sticks to that, hm?”

Peter was silent for a moment, his mind still reeling. In his opinion, you were nowhere near fit enough to be sent back home. You were still hurt, still in the thick of your healing process. He knew he wasn’t a doctor, but he didn’t trust you were alright to be sent away just yet. 

But you were gone, and knowing you, you’d probably try walking for at least half the trip. That’s what he had to worry about now. 

“Yeah, yeah you can,” he said, his voice quiet but firm. 

The nurse simply smiled at him. “You two make a cute couple.”

“Oh.. we’re not… no,” he shook his head quickly, but he’d be lying if he said her words didn’t make his heart skip a beat. So, other people saw it too.

“Uh huh,” she nodded, a sly smile playing on her lips. “That’s what they all say.”

Peter flushed. “I mean—I mean we were, but not…not anymore.”

“Your fault, I take it?” She asked with a raised brow, but Peter could tell it wasn’t really a question. 

“Um…yeah,” he murmured, looking down as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, it was.”

She let out an amused huff, as if she knew everything before Peter even said it to her. “Can I let you in on a little secret, young man?”

Peter lifted his head slightly, peeking up at her.

“Try,” she said, her voice soft but firm. “Try, try, and keep trying. I saw you with her these past few days, and I saw her with you. Now I don’t know what happened, but from what I can see, there’s a chance for you two. You just have to want it enough.”

God, did he want it. He wanted it more than anything. 

“I do,” he whispered desperately. He wasn’t sure why he was confiding in a stranger like this, but…it felt right. “I just don’t know if she feels the same. It’s—it’s been a while and I wouldn’t blame her if…”

“Oh honey, she does,” the nurse said with a small chuckle, her eyes glinting as if she knew something Peter could never guess. “Or at the very least, she will. If you want it bad enough to work for it.”

He paused. He wanted to, of course he did. But when he’d come back, you’d had James. But now…

“You said she checked herself out? How long ago?” He asked suddenly, a spark of determination in his eyes that made the nurse look at him approvingly.

“Not long, just a little bit before you arrived. But I suggest you get going, young man.”

“Peter… it’s Peter, and thank you, ma’am.”

“Don’t thank me, go get your girl, Peter.”

He didn’t need to be told twice. He was racing back down the hospital hallway the same way he’d come in, shooting a quick “thank you!” over his shoulder to the nurse. 

He was going to find you. And he was going to spend every second after that actively begging for your forgiveness.

The harsh wind hit him hard the second he stepped out of the hospital, whipping his hair back and giving his face a soft flush. But he didn’t care about any of that. He walked quickly, debating whether or not swinging would be more efficient, and making sure you got home properly. But he came to the conclusion that on foot would be better. He needed to speak to you, face to face. It was too risky, given all your injuries at the moment, he would never try something knowing there was even a chance you might get hurt. 

So he ran. He figured you wouldn’t really be able to get too far and, hopefully, you hadn’t hailed a cab just yet. He wondered whether you were planning to return to your apartment or your parents’ place. He hoped for the latter, at least then he’d be closer to you. 

It didn’t take him long to spot you, hair blowing wildly in the wind as you slowly made your way down the sidewalk. 

“Ace, wait up!”

He watched you pause, turn, meet his eyes, turn again and continue walking. He should’ve expected that, really. 

“Ace, sweetheart, please.” He was closer now, pushing through the others crowding the sidewalk. He didn’t care if anyone heard him, he didn’t care if he got weird looks. All he cared about was you.

You didn’t need to turn to know he was right behind you, you could just tell. Peter’s presence always had some sort of effect on you, a tug of some kind, as if your hearts held some sort of magnetic field only for each other, each one constantly seeking the other out. You were sure you could seek him out in a crowded room, blindfolded and deaf. 

But you didn’t turn. 

“Look Peter,” you whisper in a hoarse voice. You weren’t sure if it was from all the emotions coursing through you right now, from how rough the past couple of days had been, or if you were just tired. Maybe all one the above. “I really—really—appreciate everything you’ve done for me this past week. I’ve seen videos online of the accident and…” you inhaled deeply. It had been hard to see yourself like that. But people were set on capturing Spider-Man’s heroism on camera, you’d seen it plenty of times before. You’d just never been the victim. 

Peter winced, taking a couple long strides so he stood before you now, placing a hand on your shoulder which got you to, thankfully, stop for a second. But your gaze fell to the ground and he didn’t like that.

“You shouldn’t have done that, Ace.” He murmured gently, his voice like a soothing balm to every scar on your body, physical or not. And you hated it. “You know nothing good would come out of you seeing yourself like that.”

“It wasn’t on purpose. I didn’t go looking for the videos. But…they were all over my feed and there’s nothing better to do in the hospital than scroll.”

You didn’t mention that your algorithm tended to favor Spider-Man related videos and articles, making sure they showed up first-click for you. 

Peter’s frown only deepened. “You shouldn’t have been scrolling in the first place, you had a concussion. Surely your doctors told you that.”

You rolled your eyes. Of course that thought had crossed his mind. “I turned my brightness all the way down, it was fine.”

He scoffed as if he were personally offended at the idea. “Fine? You thought turning your brightness down would make it—”

“Oh my god, Peter.” You stared at him in disbelief. “So not the time for that.”

Peter simply sighed before he lowered the hand on your shoulder to grip the bicep of your un-injured arm gently, leading you to a small alleyway between shops on the sidewalk where the two of you had stood. 

You frowned. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“We need to talk, Ace.” He didn’t let go even after he’d stopped walking. It was as if he knew you’d make a break for it the first second you got the chance. He could tell you were overwhelmed, of course you were, who wouldn’t be after everything you’d been through. And he knew what you did when you were overwhelmed. It was what you’d done that morning walking Central Park with him.

“About what?” You averted your gaze, looking to the side, trying to come off as uninterested as possible. This might’ve been the worst possible time to try to make conversation. 

“You know about what, Ace.” He whispered softly. 

You shook your head, refusing to meet his eyes. “No, no, I told you thank you. And I meant it, but other than that, I don’t have anything to say to you.”

“What in the world are you thanking me for?”

“For saving me,” you said, as if it were obvious. 

Peter wasn’t sure he’d ever looked more horrified in his life. “Ace, sweetheart…baby, what? You never ever have to thank me for that. It’s my job.”

You tried not to react to the pet names falling so easily off his lips, but you could feel a burning in your eyes, and that horrible feeling of something stuck in your throat. “Oh please,” you tried to sound casual, but your voice was quiet in fear of it breaking into a million pieces on the alleyway floor if you raised it even a decibel, “people thank Spider-Man all the time, even if it is your job.”

“That’s not the job I was talking about,” he whispered, his voice soft as air, his grip on your arm tightening ever-so-slightly.

“Uh uh, no.” you pushed away from him, shaking your head quickly and finally looking up at him. A face so familiar, you were sure you’d remember every feature, even in death. 

Peter’s expression fell and he couldn’t help the unconscious step he took toward you, as if the two of you were in a dance, push and pull, wherever you went he followed. And god did he wish you would just let him fucking follow. 

He’d lost direction for a while, but now he was back and he needed you to lead him everywhere and then some. 

“You can’t just say shit like that as if it’s…as if it’s…” you looked away again, rubbing at your eyes as if you could just scrub all the tears, all the emotions right out. 

“As if it’s what, Ace? As if it’s normal? 'Cause it is. I may be Spider-Man, sweetheart, but my one real job, the only one I care about, the one I’d pick over everything and everyone, is protecting you. No matter how much you hate me, no matter how much you don’t want me around, I’m yours.”

You exhaled shakily, the words hitting you like a punch to the gut, knocking all the air out of your lungs. You knew it, of course you did. You knew deep down, in every fiber of your being, even when he was five hundred miles away, even when he was back and you wouldn’t look twice in his direction, if you were ever in trouble, Peter wouldn’t hesitate to be there for you. 

It was why it wasn’t a shock at all when you’d opened your eyes in that cold hospital room and he had been the first face you’d seen. 

But it hurt. God, did it hurt. Every single time you remembered it was like a hand shoved its way in your chest, broken every bone and torn every muscle to grab your heart, squeezed it roughly, and ripped it out. 

“I’m not going to let you shut me out,” he whispered seriously, “especially after everything’s that’s happened to you. So forget about it.”

You wanted to forgive him, of course you did. That night he’d stopped by your fire escape not long after his return, the walk in the park the morning after the photography competition, working together in the newsroom, dinner with him and May, the way that night had been so perfect…you’d wanted to forgive him so badly. 

But the hand shoved, and tore, and squeezed, and ripped. 

And you wanted him to know how much you hurt. That you weren’t just being petty and difficult, but that you’d loved and loved and loved till it tore you in half.  

Your lip wobbled, but you fought to push through, to get the words out before you lost them forever, “I waited. I waited for you every night and every day I thought you would come back for me. I thought you’d try to fix things between us again, because how could you be okay with it? But that was the only way I pushed through, I told myself this was what you wanted, you didn’t want to be with me, for now at least, you needed to grow and you need your own space and I owed it to you because of how much I loved you.”

Sniffling, you wiped some tears off your face before continuing, “But I fucking waited, Peter, because I couldn’t give up on us. Every night I’d turn on my lamp and sit by the window and look for the stars and wonder if you were doing the same thing, if you were thinking of me when you saw them. If you were thinking of me at all.

“I was so excited when you asked to see me during winter break, I thought ‘this is it, we’re finally gong to fix things, but then you cancelled.”

“I’m so sorry Ace—”

“I know that you lied,” you breathed. You were silent for a minute, letting your words sink in for him. “I know that you lied to me about not being able to make it. I went home that night anyway, I was going to visit my parents and drop off your present with May, but when I turned the corner I saw you, walking and laughing and standing right there after you’d told me you couldn’t see me because your flight got cancelled.

“And what's even worse,” you let out a laugh that held no humor, “is that I still defended you! I still tried to reason it out because I didn’t want to believe that you would lie to me—”

“I wouldn’t lie to you Ace, please—”

“But you did!” You snapped. “And you’re doing it right now too, because I saw you, Peter! And I really just don’t understand why you would invite me in the first place just to cancel on me, is it some weird manipulation tactic or something?” Even as the words left your mouth, they felt wrong, and you felt a stab of regret when you saw the immediate flash of hurt that took over his features.

Peter Parker was a lot of things, but that wasn’t one of them.

“God, no. Never. Of course not, I—” he sighed and ran a hand through his hair, tugging slightly, “I did want to see you, and my flight did get cancelled.”

“Then what happened, Pete?” Your voice was soft, quiet, sad. He felt like beating himself up but he owed you this, owed you this explanation because the thought of you spending over a year thinking he had done that to manipulate you? Or worse, because he didn’t want to see you at all, was killing him.

“I was going to tell you I booked another flight, but then I thought of seeing you,” a tear fell down his face. Then another. “I thought of actually seeing you and having to leave again, about not being able to stay, not being able to kiss you and hold you like I wanted—like I needed—and I couldn’t do it, Ace. I couldn’t handle it I’m sorry.”

You watched him cry, speechless, as your own tears fell silently down your face. So much time lost, so much hurt spread and felt. “I didn’t know you’d seen me,” he continued, “I had no clue Y/N.” He walked up to you and grabbed your hand in his, placing his other on the shoulder of your arm with the cast. “I would’ve fixed it or—or done something, fuck, I don’t know, but anything other than you thinking that I didn’t want to see you. I’m sorry I was so fucking scared.”

“MJ said you had a girlfriend,” you were staring at your shoes now. You weren’t quite sure why those words had left your mouth, you were nowhere near that topic, but…it was the only thing you could think.

“I’m sorry, what?” 

His confusion made you confused, and you looked up to see his utterly lost expression. “You don’t have to lie Peter, she told me about the girl you were going out with and I get it, really, I’m not mad. Hell, that’s why I went out with James so—”

“Ace, baby, I never had a girlfriend. I never went out with anyone.”

You went silent. What? “But—but MJ said you went on a date?”

“Ace, I know I haven’t been Mr. Honesty in the past, we just covered that, but I’m telling you, I never went on a date. I mean, there was this one time where my roommate tried to set me up with someone, he did that thing where the three of us plan a hangout and the third person conveniently ‘bails’ at the last second, but I left as soon as I found out what was going on, like, right after he told me he wouldn't be making it. But I don’t possibly know how MJ could know about that.”

You shook your head, confusion growing more by the second. “That’s not what happened. MJ told me she was on the phone with you, and there was a girl, and you were getting dressed up, like date dressed up, and…” you trailed off, waiting for the punch to the gut when he told you that there was a mistake, that there was a date and he had just forgotten up until now. 

“I still don’t know what you mean—” You saw the realization dawning on his features. “Son of a bitch,” he murmured, shaking his head. 

“So you did go on a date,” you mumbled bitterly. 

“No! God, no,” he shook his head quickly, dismissing the words as soon as they left your mouth. “But…I was on FaceTime with her one day while I was getting ready—”

“For your date.”

“No, Ace. God, stop saying that. No…I was getting ready for some lame celebratory dinner with my physics team. There was this competition with other colleges, it’s sort of a big deal, it was in the paper and stuff, you probably would’ve written a killer article about it, but anyway we won, so we organized this dinner at a fancy restaurant to celebrate.”

Your burrows furrowed as you took in his words. A celebratory team dinner? But what about—

“And the girl? The girl was Amy, she was dating my roommate, she’s actually who introduced me to the team. Yeah, she was rushing me ‘cause I was late, and she was my ride. It was not a date, Ace. It was…it was just a bunch of nerds celebrating beating some other nerds.” 

He stepped even closer to you, giving your hand a gentle squeeze. “It wasn’t a date, Y/N. Please believe me.”

Your mind was reeling. So…the whole time he was away…since graduation…

“You never went out with anyone else?” Your voice was quiet, scared, as if this time, his answer would be different. 

“No, baby. Never.” He answered without hesitation. “I’ve never wanted anyone else, I’ve never thought about anyone else. It has only ever been you, Ace. It will only ever be you.”

Tears burned in your eyes and you could feel your face flushing with unshed emotions. But that meant everything you’d been imagining, everything that had set you off, your catalyst, it hadn’t been true. 

“B-but I thought…You were supposed to…”

“No,” he whispered softly, leaning down to be more face level with you. “I’m not supposed to do anything other than be with you. And I know—I know I’m the reason I lost you in the first place, but I swear on everything I am, Ace, I was doing it for you. Even if it was stupid and horrible for the both of us, my only intention was what would benefit you in the long run.

“This relationship—us—me and you… it’s never been fair to you, and that’s completely my fault. I know how much you used to worry about me when I was out being Spider-Man. You used to lie, to say you were staying up for some other reason, not to make sure I got home safe. But I could see through you every time.”

You shook your head followed, by a soft sniffle. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“It has to do with everything, Ace. It wouldn’t have been fair to you, worrying about me every second I wasn’t on the other side of the phone, staying up just to hear from me, staying in and opting out from every event just get in a short call with me…It was too much, too much for me to ever willingly put you through.”

A part of you wanted to argue, to tell him you’d missed out on a good night’s sleep, on more parties and events than you could count because of the breakup. But another part of you knew that that wouldn’t have helped. The part that knew Peter Parker would do anything for you. Even if it meant making his life even harder than it already would’ve been after moving to a new city in a new state to attend a new school. 

“You know I would’ve put myself through that and worse for you,” you whispered brokenly. 

“I do know.” He lifted the hand that gripped just below your shoulder and brought it up to cup your face, his thumb gently caressing your skin, wiping away tears that you hadn’t even realized had fallen. And it felt so good to be held by him like this again, so right, so perfect. It was like every cell in your body was finally alive after being dormant for two years. 

“And that’s why I had to be the one to end things, because you never would’ve.”

It only took one shaky inhale before you crumbled, sobbing hard while Peter held you close, his large arms wrapping around you and pulling you into his chest, being mindful of your broken arm. 

Your mind was a super cut of every moment the two of you shared up until now. Graduation, running into him that first day of spring semester, the photography competition, that conversation in the park the morning after…He was still Peter. Your Peter. He always had been. 

Pulling away, you sniffled, wiping your nose with your sleeve, looking up at him through tear heavy lashes. Peter didn’t waste a second before he was cupping your face between his hands, holding you reverently, and if you were the most precious thing in the world. And with the way he was looking at you right now, you almost believed it yourself. 

“You know,” you cleared your throat, your voice still watery and shaky from all your tears, “I still haven’t fully forgiven you, Pete. Even with good intentions, what you did…it gutted me.”

Peter’s eyes clenched shut with pain. But not for himself and your lack of forgiveness, no, but for you and what he’d put you through. Even if what he’d done had hurt him too, had hurt more than breaking every bone in his body, it hurt more that he’d caused you any sort of pain. 

“I don’t blame you, sweetheart, of course I don’t,” he murmured quietly, leaning down and pressing his forehead against your own. His heart skipped a beat when you didn’t pull away, when he realized you hadn’t pulled away from him at all tonight. “But I just have one thing to ask of you, Ace.”

You looked up at him, a question in your eyes. Peter takes a second to just relish in the moment, the feeling of your soft skin against the palms of his hands, those beautiful eyes that he’d dreamt about every night, brighter than any star in the galaxy, looking up at him…he enjoys every second and he thanks whatever god or angel may be listening for giving him this again. 

“Just…don’t decide to hate me just yet, alright? I know I have no right to ask you of this, and you have every right to hate me as much and as soon as possible. But can you just take a few days? Maybe three? Think about everything and then get back to me? And I promise you no more lies, no more big decisions without talking to you first…just…just me. And you.”

Your lips quirked up with a small smile as you leaned into his touch. “Three days?”

“Three days.”

“Deal.”

(3 months later)

“See that brighter star just below Orion’s belt?”

“Yes, she’s very pretty.”

“Well, I’m sure she appreciates the compliment, Ace. But I think it’s a dude.”

“What?” You frowned deeply at his words. “And why would that be?”

“That’s Sirius, the brightest star in Earth’s night sky.”

“Oh my god!” You flipped over and pushed yourself up onto your elbows to look down at him. “Like in Harry Potter!”

Peter laughed loudly, already expecting that same exact response from you. He grabbed at you and tugged you back down onto his chest. “Just wait, Ace, it gets better. Sirius is a part of a constellation called Canis Major, also known as the ‘Greater Dog’ constellation.”

“Dog! Just like in Harry Potter!”

He chuckled again. “Yeah, yeah. Just like in Harry Potter.”

Things had been going well for you two so far. The three days after that night had passed and you’d decided to forgive him, and give him another chance, if anything, for that girl who’d spent over a year sitting by the window, hoping and dreaming for another chance like this. It didn’t mean everything was okay, you’d been sure to remind him of that, and you’d told him to think of this as more of a pre-second chance. 

Honestly, you’d been teasing more than anything, but he’d accepted without a second thought. But it was a big help, slowly getting back into this. It felt so natural, it took little to no effort. And yet, every now and again he’d say something about a place on his old campus he thought you’d love, you’d introduce him to new places you’d found around the city and had thought of sharing with him since you’d first been there. 

It was eye-opening in its own way. Despite going through all that time not speaking or seeing each other, you were still with each other. Always. 

Wherever one of you went, the other followed, whether physically or not. It was made obvious in all the USBs Peter had filled with photos of things that had reminded him of you. It was made obvious in the box of handwritten letters you’d been writing for him since he’d left. 

It was a beautiful thing, to be so loved, despite everything that had come between you. Despite the silence, the distance, the hurt—you’d both still held on, just like he’d promised. You’d still carried each other, remembered each other in the quiet ways that mattered most. 

“Hey,” he spoke up softly, pointing up at the sky. That was another thing you’d discovered he’d done to keep you close during those darker times. Learn more star stuff to share with you. “See that one? The kind of dimmer one to Sirius’ right?”

“Mhm.”

“That one’s called Procyon, and it’s the principal star in the constellation Canis Major, which is the ‘Lesser Dog constellation.”

“Wait…” Peter bit back a laugh as you flipped over again to look down at him. He knew you couldn’t help yourself and he found it equally hilarious and adorable that every time you had something to say, you had to be looking at him to do so. 

“Yes, Ace?”

“There’s a “Greater Dog’ and Lesser Dog’ constellation? That’s so mean! Why’re we comparing them like that?”

Yup. Absolutely adorable. “I dunno, Ace, maybe the ancient stargazers had something against dogs.”

You scoffed and lay back down against his chest. “So…is Procyon the ‘lesser’ dog ‘cause she’s smaller?”

Peter smiled, his eyes no longer on the sky as you lay back down against his chest. “Yes, Procyon is the lesser dog because it’s not as bright as Sirius. But its name actually means ‘before the dog’ in Greek because it rises before Sirius, which y’know, they sometimes just call the ‘dog star.’”

You hummed softly taking in all his words. “You know what’s so crazy? This is the same sky people looked at thousands and thousands of years ago.”

Peter nodded, his gaze drifting back up to the stars. “That is crazy. Some of those things have been in the sky for millions of year, and people have been looking at them and making constellations out of them for thousands.”

“I wonder how old some of those are,” you mused quietly. 

“It varies, Peter answered simply, “Sirius, the one that we were just talking about? Yeah, it’s still a relatively young star, only about 500 million years old. Some others, like the ones in Orion’s Belt, are billions of years old. It depends on their size and what stage of life they’re in.”

“Imagine being 500 million years old and still being considered young.” You snorted in amusement. Flipping over once again, you smiled down at Peter. “You know a lot more star stuff than you used to.”

Peter grinned, glad he’d impressed you. “Yeah? Be honest, is it hot?”

You couldn’t stop the loud laugh that escaped you. “Hot? Really? That’s what you want to know?”

“Yeah, of course it is.” He was grinning widely now as he pushed himself onto his elbows. “So come on.”

Averting your gaze, you tried not to notice how good his biceps look today, or how his t-shirt had ridden up, revealing the faint line of his abs, just enough to make your thoughts wander. 

“Nope,” you said easily, shaking your head, “it isn’t hot.”

“You little…liar!” Peter lunged at you, tackling you to the ground and pinning you down as you let out a surprised laugh. 

Silence filled the small hilltop, your old place. It had been your first time coming back here since…everything, and you couldn’t have imagined it anymore perfect. 

Even if Peter was always a worrywart.

“Oh my god, Ace, I’m so sorry, did I hurt you—”

“Peter—Petey—relax, sweetie, I’m fine.” You assured him, gently placing a hand over his which was resting on the side of your ribcage. Also known as one of the places where you’d been injured previously. 

He gave you a look as if he didn’t quite believe you. “You always say that, but you were hurt—”

“And now I’m better,” you whispered, giving his hand a soft squeeze, “thanks to you.”

Peter never left you after that night in the alleyway. He’d taken you back to your parents’ apartment (which was conveniently right beside his) and he’d done everything he could to make you more comfortable and make sure you received the proper rest you were in dire need of. 

He had claimed this his actions during that time shouldn’t affect your judgment of his over the course of the three days he’d given you. But of course it had, how could it not? Peter Parker loved you, and you loved him. And despite all the things that you’d been through, you were here now. 

And that meant something. 

You used to wonder if you and Peter held any similarities to the seasonal constellations he’d told you all about. How, once, the two of you had been shining so brightly, and everyone could notice. 

And then came the darker times, when your stars were dimmer, the sky darker, and all you could do was think about what it would be like if you still had him. 

But now you were back, and shining better than ever.

And you had a good feeling that this time would last.

“Hey Ace,” he whispered with a large smile on his face.

“Yes, Peter?”

“I’m so in love with you.”

Yeah?” You grinned wide. “Tell me again.”

He laughed and leaned down to press a soft kiss to the tip of your nose. “I’ll tell you however many times you want.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

oh my goodness🥹💕 its over ahhh i loved writing them so much! if you ever want to see more of them, i’d love to write blurbs and dribbles for them so don’t be afraid to request anything!

thank you all so much for reading!!

‘seasonal’ taglist: @keira-kaz2y5 @imafangirlofeverything @lov3vivian

@miilesvsp @rkivesfilm @starshine145

@blondygwendy

[jennaispunk]

I Will Follow You Into The Dark

Summary: Max tries to help you the only way he knows how.

Pairing: Max Phillips x f!reader

Rating: M

Word Count: 4.4k

Tags: angst, love, tw: blood, tw: illness, brief oral (f!receiving), allusions to smut, I can’t tag much more without spoilers, no physical description of reader, reader can be picked up by Max but is a vampire so he’s ridiculously strong.

A/N: This was written for @almostfoxglove “Lets Get Angsty” challenge. I’m sorry it’s so late, Freya!! This is my attempt to give Max a bit of a backstory to explain why he became what we see in Bloodsucking Bastards. I hope you enjoy it. The title comes from a song by Death Cab for Cutie.

Thank you so much @jolapeno for letting me bend your ear about this. Your kindness and friendship are such a blessing.

The moodboard was not my creation, it was all the lovely genius of @almostfoxglove.

Dividers and banner by @saradika-graphics

It all happened so fast….

Since the moment you met Max, everything seemed to move so fast, like those Japanese bullet trains you read about, hurling you toward your destination at breakneck speeds as the rest of the world went by in a blur.

The day you met Max would be forever engrained in your memory. You were in a hurry to meet your friends at a bar and the road was slick with rain. You slipped when your heel got stuck in the trolley tracks and you hit the pavement. In a flash, he was there, and before you realized what was happening, he was lifting you off the pavement with ease. You would never forget the way his eyes shimmered in the streetlights.

Falling in love was never part of the plan. It was just supposed to be fun, with no strings attached. Somehow, you found yourself ensnared by his crooked grin and effortless charm. Those eyes pulled you in; sparking pools of chocolate that pulled you in and refused to let go.

Pushing him away was the hardest thing you’d ever done. He told you he loved you; he all but begged you not to go, but you walked out anyway. You didn’t have a choice. They had given you a death sentence, and you wouldn’t let him watch you slowly slip away. It was better this way, at least that’s what you told yourself, but the ache in your heart reminded you of how much of a lie that was.

Life wasn’t fair. How could the universe be so damn cruel to give you this death sentence after you finally found the love of your life? The two of you were supposed to have years together, maybe even eternity. You wish you could live in blissful ignorance of this disease and believe that you had the best years of your life ahead of you with the man you loved. Now, you had to face your mortality alone.

He never thought he would find love after being turned, but you had wormed your way into his heart without even trying. Your blood called to him like a siren song, your scent like honeysuckle and strawberries. He tried like hell to fight it, but he knew the second he saw you that the two of you were meant for each other.

He knows he shouldn’t be here; you asked him to stay away. He should respect your wishes, but he can’t.

The slight pressure of his knuckles against the door causes it to creak open. His brow furrows: It isn’t like you to leave your door unlocked, let alone open. The soft click of his against the hardwood floor echoes through the empty room. The apartment is too quiet. You always have the television or music on in the background. The little hairs on the back of his neck stand up. He calls out your name once, then twice, and gets no response.

His eyes go wide as he finds you curled up on the bathroom floor. Immediately, he drops to his knees and scoops you into his arms. Your skin is clammy, glistening with a thin sheen of sweat. Something is wrong, and he’s thankful he showed up when he did.

“Baby…are you okay? What’s wrong?”

It sounded as if he were talking underwater, his voice muffled. You blink a few times, trying to clear your blurry vision before giving up and closing them again. How did he get in here? You thought you locked the door, but you don’t even remember closing it.

“I-I’m fine.”

Like an idiot, you forgot your pills this morning. You thought you’d be home before your headache got too bad. Obviously, you were wrong.

The ringing in your ears is subsiding, the world slowly coming back to you. You push away from Max and rest against the bathroom wall. His pity is the last thing you need.

“You’re not fine.”

Max’s eyes roam over your body and settle on the angry, raised bump on your forehead.

“I said I’m fine.” you snap.

“You’re not fine,” he snaps back. “I’m taking you to the hospital.”

Your head jerks up to look at him. Bile rises in the back of your throat, and you clamp your eyes closed. Maybe your medication hasn’t kicked in yet.

“No.”

“Damn it! Why are you being so stubborn?”

You release a shaky breath. Why couldn’t he just stay away?

“The hospital won’t to help me.”

His fists clench at his sides. Why won’t you just let him help you?

“What? What wouldn’t the hospital be able to help you?”

You swallow hard. The truth was bound to come out eventually and now that he’s seen you like this; you know he won’t stop until you tell him the truth.

“I-I’m dying, Max.”

Your voice echoed off the tiles. That was the first time you said those words out loud. The devastation you felt when you got the diagnosis comes rushing back.

You didn’t think you had any more tears left to cry, but once again, your cheeks were wet. Your tears blurred his beautiful features. You could barely make out his mocha eyes and his pouty lips.

Strong arms wrap around you. His left hand snakes into your hair, cupping the back of your head and cradling you to his chest. He was at a loss for words. He could feel all your pain…all your heartbreak. For the first time since he turned, he felt powerless. He hated the feeling.

“How long?”

His voice was so quiet, you almost didn’t hear him.

“Six months.” you mumble. “But the doctor said there’s no way to know for sure.”

The rage he felt made his fangs itch. He wanted to tear the entire world apart for doing this to you. You were a beautiful, vibrant woman in the prime of her life. You didn’t deserve this.

The silence between you buzzed in your ears. The universe must be punishing you for what you were doing. Maybe God was real, and this was the consequence of dancing with the devil.

Max loosens his grip on you and tucked a finger under your chin, forcing you to look up at him. Even your tears didn’t dampen how beautiful you looked.

He knew there was something he could do to fix this, but it was the one thing he dreaded most. His eyes bored into yours and his Adam’s apple bobbed. He wouldn’t suggest this if there was any other way.

“I could save you,” he whispers. “I could take this all away.”

Your eyes went wide, knowing exactly what he’s suggesting.

“Are you offering to make me like you?”

The last time you brought it up, he flat out refused. He shut you down without even discussing it. He said he would never hurt you by making you a vampire and made you swear to never bring it up again. You kept that promise.

“Yes.”

The word felt like acid in his throat. He swore he would never turn you into a monster, and now here he was offering to do exactly that.

He had never turned anyone before. He wasn’t even sure exactly how it worked. There was no one he could turn to for help; he’d have to figure it out on his own.

“I thought you didn’t want me to be like you.”

He never wanted this life for you, but things had changed. Losing you wasn’t an option. Keeping you with him was his only priority.

“Things are different now.”

His eyes darkened as he looked at you. Would you be different once you turned? Would his sweet girl disappear? A million other questions ran through his mind, but he couldn’t think about all that now. He had to save you, no matter the cost.

“You don’t have to do this, you know? I know what this will cost you.”

He crushes you against his chest and slants his lips on yours. He kisses you hard, his tongue pushing past your lips to taste you. There’s nothing sweet about what he’s doing; it’s rough and passionate. He pulls back, leaving you panting for air.

“Yes, I do.”

The conviction in that statement made everything real. Your heart pounded in your chest. It couldn’t be that easy, could it? This wasn’t just a little taste, he would have to drink more of your blood than he ever had before. He had always been so careful with you, but would the temptation of be too much for him? The risk you were taking was huge, but then again what was the alternative? Wasting away, becoming weaker until your body finally gave up?

There was no doubt in his mind that he would do whatever it took to keep you. He spent so many years feeling like he didn’t deserve love, and you changed all that. He wasn’t about to let you slip through his fingers.

He kisses you once more. This time, it’s soft and sweet. He gently nibbles on your bottom lip before his tongue slips inside. His tongue languidly explores your mouth for the briefest of moments.

Your mouth chases his as he pulls away, but he stops you by pressing his forehead against yours.

“I love you.”

You feel a rush of air against your face and open your eyes to find he’s already gone.

“I love you, too.”

Max scoured the notes and journals he’d acquired, looking for anything that might help him. There had to be something in these old papers that would help him do this right. The few journal entries about turning a human were vague at best, leaving him with more questions than answers. For the first time in a very long time, he wished his maker were here so he could tell him what to do. This had to work; the alternative was unthinkable.

Time was not on your side. If he was going to turn you, he had to do it sooner rather than later, or you would be too weak to survive the transformation.

He hated that he even had to do this. He was supposed to spare you from pain, not cause it. This wouldn’t be easy on you, not by a long shot. All he could do was hope that he was doing the right thing.

You both decided his place is where it would happen. His apartment was soundproof, so no one could hear you if you scream. He tried to prepare you the best that he could. He explained what he would do and how you would feel. It would be painful, but that pain would subside into a peaceful sleep and when you woke up, you’d be his forever. The two of you would be forever bonded by blood and you would feel a connection unlike any you ever felt before.

You put on a brave face, but you were scared. Max sugarcoated the process, you were sure of it. He was trying to keep you from getting too scared to go through with it and you loved him for it. Before stepping into the bedroom, you sneak into his study and slip a note into the desk drawer. It’s a note you hope he never has to read.

Max set up his bedroom like something out of a romance novel. There were dozens of candles lit, giving the room an ethereal glow. He made the bed using the softest cotton sheets in your favorite color, adding pillows and warm blankets. This should be the most special night of your life. You were taking a risk and trusting him to do something that might kill you. He had to make this everything you dreamed of.

Everything about the room was perfect. He filled the room with all your favorites: your favorite colors, your favorite scents, and your favorite sounds. It was beautiful. You wanted to remember this moment. Tonight was the last night of your life as you knew it. You hug yourself as the reality of what’s about to happen hits you.

“Do you like it?”

The touch of his hand on your shoulder makes you jump.

“It’s beautiful.”

You walk to the bed and run your fingers over the sheets. This was really happening; You were about to let him turn you into a vampire.

He gently grasps your shoulders and turns you to face him. His eyes are softer than you’ve ever seen them. He swallows hard and smiles.

“Do you want another minute?”

Your lips press into a thin line. Your throat is so dry that you can barely get the words out.

“No…I’m ready.”

Max’s hand trails down your arm and takes your hand in his. He hopes you can’t see how scared he is. If this doesn’t go well, he’ll never forgive himself. He has to try though, it’s worth the risk. He can’t lose you.

He guides you to the bed, helping you to lie down. The scent of your blood is driving him crazy; making it hard to think straight. Watching the bounce of your carotid is mesmerizing. He could just bite down and take his fill. He knows you would let him, but you’re not just a meal. You are the love of his life. You are the one that loved him for who he really was, not the monster he’d become.

He crawls over you and slants his mouth on yours. His tongue dances with yours as he pushes up the hem of your dress and caresses your thigh. The monster within him wants to ravage you. He wants to take you rough and fast, devouring every inch of you until you are completely his for eternity. The man he wants to be is trying to do the exact opposite.

He pulls back and turns his face away from you. The war within himself is raging. He didn’t want you to see his darkness; He wanted to be strong for you and be the man you deserve.

You reach up and touch his cheek, trying to turn his face back toward you. You can see the tendons in his neck strain. The muscles of his jaw twitch. Was he having second thoughts?

“What’s wrong?” you pant softly.

His eyes are closed so tightly that he sees white. He has to get control of himself for your sake. This isn’t supposed to be a terrifying experience for you.

“Nothing.” He says through gritted teeth. “I just need a…a minute.”

The tingle in his fangs grows stronger; the blood lust is taking over. He runs his tongue over his teeth to buy some time.

You stare up at him. He looks like he’s in pain. This isn’t what you want for him; you don’t want him putting himself through this just for you.

“It’s okay, baby.” you whisper. “I trust you.”

His jaw goes slack. Your trust is the greatest gift you could give. He looks down at you, his mocha irises have taken on a maroon hue. He knows what he has to do. The monster can’t win.

He doesn’t respond, he just kisses you again. He wants you to get lost in the feeling and let all your worries go.

Nimble fingers ghost over your skin as they follow the trail of open-mouthed kisses down your body. A gentle nip against one thigh, and then the other before he descends upon your center. Your hips twitch as his lush lips suction over your sensitive bundle of nerves. The sensation zings through your body and you know your orgasm is only seconds away. The delicious tension in your lower abdomen is enough to make your eyes water and your first tightens in his hair. He draws his tongue in tight circles, and waves of pleasure wash over you as you cry out his name. 

“Max…” you breathe. “Bite me, please.”

“Not yet.” he murmurs into your skin. “Not yet.”

His lips find every spot on your body that makes you shiver, marking them as his. You are an addiction for him; the one that he can’t get enough of. His world is so much brighter with you in it. You believe he’s saving you, yet you’re the one giving his life purpose.

Every kiss, every ragged breath, draws you further into him. He’s the only thing that exists for you now; he’s your second chance at life. Life…what a funny word. How ironic that the one thing that will allow you to live is death.

 He makes love to you slowly and gently, making you fall apart for him, ringing every bit of pleasure from you until you're exhausted and sweaty.

He kisses you one more time. His eyes are even more red now, but you’re not afraid. You want this; you want him, more than anything.

“Just try to relax, okay? It’s going to hurt for a minute, but then it will feel amazing, I promise.”

You smile weakly and nod your head. If this is how it ends, it’s worth it. Dying in the arms of the man you love is the way you want to go. 

“I love you.”

Your whispered words float to his ears like a gentle breeze, and the corner of his mouth lifts into a crooked smile.

“I love you, too.”

His fangs glisten in the candlelight and then sink into your neck. There’s a slight pinch and then your body feels as if it’s on fire. The heat spreads from your neck, radiating out to your arms, down your torso and all the way to your toes. Your fingers dig into his shoulders and a scream ripples from your throat. The intense sensation becomes even stronger, like you’re burning from the inside out. Your back arches off the bed as he drinks from you. All you can feel is pain…and then it’s gone.

Max moans as your blood touches his tongue. It’s the sweetest thing he’s ever tasted, better than the finest wine or richest chocolate. He could drink from you forever; it’s as though every bit of goodness from you is a part of him now. All your love and compassion are just as much his now as they are yours. Your essence flows through him, making him feel whole again.

You feel lighter than you ever have, like you’re floating on the fluffiest cloud. It doesn’t hurt anymore, and you’re at peace. Your mind drifts and you imagine yourself in a beautiful open meadow; birds are chirping and the sun is warming your face. Max is beside you as wade through the tall grass. It’s euphoric, like the best high you ever had. This feels like heaven.

Max drinks deeper. He should stop soon, but you taste so good that a little more won’t hurt. You feebly push at his shoulder, but he can’t pull away. He keeps taking and taking; drinking in your essence.

Darkness descends on your meadow. The vibrant colors of the flowers and the sky become muted. Looking down at your hand, you see it’s become almost transparent. You're fading away and you’re powerless to stop it. You grasp for Max, but he slips through your fingers. Little by little, your body is disappearing until you completely fade away.

He doesn’t have the strength to pull away. In the back of his mind, he can feel your breathing become more shallow. ‘Just a bit more…it’s okay’ he tells himself. The monster inside him won’t let him stop.

Your hand slips from his shoulder as your final breath leaves your body. There’s just nothing now, just endless black all around. 

Max pulls away and wipes the blood from his chin. He feels more alive than he ever has. He looks down at your still form. You look so peaceful, like a beautiful angel sent to earth just for him. You made him believe in love again, and now you were his for eternity. He kisses your parted lips and tears himself away from you.

As he waits, he wipes the blood from your neck with a soft cloth. His mind races. What will you say when you open your eyes again? Will you feel scared or angry? Will you regret letting him do this?

Each tick of the clock feels like an eternity. It could take several hours for you to complete the transition and become your new self, but he doesn’t want to leave you alone; the worst thing that could happen to a new vampire is to wake up alone.

Time is crawling. He paces the floor in front of the bed, waiting for a sign that this worked. He prayed for it; something he hadn’t even thought about since he was a little boy when his mother forced him to attend church every Sunday. The silver cross his mother wore around her porcelain neck is permanently etched into his memory.

Looking down at the dried blood crusted on his chest, he felt his skin tighten. He should clean up, so you don’t panic when you see him. The red tinged water cascaded down his body and into the drain, washing away the brutality of his actions. This was a new start for the both of you, a chance to go anywhere and do anything. You would be free of pain and the two of you could spend forever together.

He sat down on the bed and took your limp hand in his. Little droplets of water ran down the back of his neck. You should be awake by now; it had been hours. He ran his hand through his hair as the panic set in. Maybe he just needed to give it more time. There wasn’t an instruction manual for turning humans into vampires.

The hours ticked by and he couldn’t take it anymore. This was taking too long. Something was wrong. 

He sat at your side, never moving as the sun’s rays slipped past the blinds. When he shook you gently and you didn’t respond; he shook you harder, your body jerking with the motion.

“No, no, no.” he whispers.

He tapped your cheek, but you didn’t move. A feeling of dread washed over him. This wasn’t how it was supposed to be. You should be awake right now, looking at him with tired, beautiful eyes. You were his.

He gathers you into his arms and holds your limp body to his chest. He slowly rocks you as tears stream down his cheeks. You’re gone…and you’re not coming back.

Rage fills his body, and he gently lowers you back to the bed. He paces, raking his fingers through his hair. This was supposed to save you, not end your life. He can’t help but think of all the things he’s stolen from you, from the both of you.

Max pulls the journals off the shelves, furiously flipping the pages. There must be something that he missed…but there’s nothing. There are no magic words, no spells or potions that can take back what he’s done. He’s killed the thing he loved most in this world. The desk landed on its side with a loud thud, sending the books and papers flying.

Something caught his eye in all that mess. An envelope with his name on it, the handwriting was yours; he could recognize it anywhere.

Max, 

If you’re reading this, it means I’m gone. I want you to know I fought so hard to stay with you. I wanted that forever so badly. 

Whatever you do, promise me you won’t blame yourself. I don’t. You did the best you could for me. It just wasn’t meant to be. 

There is so much good in you, my love. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. Please don’t lose that. Fight the darkness inside you. 

I love you with all my heart. If there is something after this, I will find you again. I swear. We’ll have the things we’ve always dreamed of. 

His head tilts back, and he howls, screaming to the heavens and cursing anything and everything for taking you from him. He chucks a lamp across the room, watching it shatter against the wall. He’s blinded by hatred for himself as he tears the room apart, the crashing and banging doing nothing to absolve him of his guilt.

You lie splayed across the bed, and he moves to you once more, the mattress creaking softly beneath his weight. His fingers caress your cold cheek as he murmurs his apologies into your temple.

“I’m so sorry…I’m so sorry, baby….”

He’s not sure how long he holds you like this, but his voice is hoarse and he’s hungry. He needs to feed again. The thought disgusts him, but he can’t deny the need for blood. That monster inside him is calling to him once again, the monster that he could only keep in check because of you. There wasn’t any need to fight that monster anymore.

Under the cover of night, he takes your wrapped body to your favorite place. You loved stargazing, and it only seemed right for you to be where you had the best view of the stars.

“Please forgive me, my love.”

Those whispered words would be the last he ever said to you. He hoped he hadn’t dammed you to some horrible afterlife by doing what he’d done.

He pulled his mother’s silver cross from his pocket. He hissed in pain as he laid it on your chest. His skin sizzles and thin wisps of smoke rise into the air. The wound will heal soon enough, but he wishes it wouldn’t. The pain was a small price to pay. He deserved to suffer for his mistake, to burn for eternity for harming the most precious thing in the world.

He looks to the full moon, shining down on the freshly packed dirt that covered your body. Never again would he let someone in; he wasn’t worthy of someone’s love.

The hunger gnawed at him again. The monster called out, and this time, he didn’t fight it. It started with a hallow feeling in the pit of his stomach, shadows wrapping their dark, wispy tendrils around what used to be his heart. He let the darkness consume him…and then he was gone.

NPT (because there was interest on my wip wednesday post): @sawymredfox @letsgobarbs @maggiemayhemnj @bitchesuntitled @mermaidgirl30 @jessthebaker @pedges-world @vichons

[peachhcs]

sunday mornings

hughes!sister x will smith au (samy + will)

slow mornings with will and samy

word count: 1.7k

warnings: kissing, hickeys, kind of suggestive but not really, samy and will being cutie

fr in my posting era this is a valentine's day post, but the story doesn't center around v-day. i kind of wrote this as if samy goes to bc instead of michigan in this, so yeah just ignore that. i thought this was cutie and wanted to post it in honor of valentine's day :)

au masterlist

the sun poured through the blinds. rays of light hit will's dorm room at every angle, creating one directly across samy's eye-line. the warmth of the rays and the harsh beams of light in her eye caused a stir. typical morning disorientation caught up to her as she blinked a few times and tried remembering her surroundings. everything fell into place when she felt will's strong hold on her torso and his face buried into the crook of her neck, still fast asleep. no wonder why the sun wasn't in his eyes.

the brunette smiled briefly before stretching as much as will's hold would let her. somewhere was her phone that she tried reaching around for. she finally got ahold of it and the screen lit up displaying the numerous notifications on her lockscreen, but all samy cared about was the time. 10:30?

it was rare having will still asleep beside her at such an hour. more often than not, he'd be long gone at morning practice and probably just getting back as samy woke up. having him in bed still was quite a rarity and one the brunette planned to take full advantage of. sunday mornings were will's off days which meant he was always inviting her over to spend the night so they could wake up together. samy loved mornings with will.

she shut her phone off, forgetting it somewhere on the bed again and turned her body further into her boyfriend's. she reached her arm around to begin gently pulling her fingers through his messy curls. he always looked so peaceful when he slept. samy knew how much he needed the sleep considering how early he was up at every other day of the week.

their limbs were tangled together making it so samy couldn't leave even if she wanted to, but she didn't plan on leaving such a serene moment. if she could, she'd stay in this position forever and she knew will felt the same.

both being student-athletes left little time during the week for them to see one another. the weekend was truly the only time they got it to themselves and it always went by too fast.

will stirred a moment later. he shifted, pulling his face back from samy's neck and blinking like she did to regain his surroundings. once it came back, his sleep-ridden stare met hers.

"good morning," samy whispered softly.

"good morning pretty girl. what time is it?" will mumbled as samy flushed at the nickname. no matter how tired will was, he always had her blushing like a little girl.

"like 10:30," the brunette said, her fingers reaching up to rid the hair from his forehead.

"10:30? been awhile since i've slept that long," will mumbled.

"well, you definitely deserve it. hungry at all?" samy began making a move to get up, but will's hold quickly tightened to keep her in place.

"no, no not yet," the boy said a little too quickly making the girl chuckle.

"not yet?" she raised her eyebrow, fingers still racking through his soft curls.

"i am, but i don't wanna leave this moment. not yet. i wanna savor it some more," will answered honestly making samy flush. she settled herself back down and will shifted around so her head was on his chest instead. his strong arms had her in a tight hold and samy felt a gentle kiss being placed onto her head. 

the girl smiled, enjoying the sound of will's heartbeat and his gentle touch against her skin. his one hand traced little shapes into the exposed area of her waist. as samy listened though, she could feel his heartbeat speeding up and she knew that meant will was getting anxious about something. she placed her hand across his bare chest, starting to rub soothing circles into his skin. 

"you okay?" samy wondered. 

"hmm?" will mumbled and the girl lifted her head up to meet his gaze. 

"you're thinking about something," the brunette said simply. will raised his eyebrow, confused on how she knew that. "your heart starts beating faster when you're thinking about something," she filled in the gaps. 

a tiny blush began spreading across will's cheeks, "sorry, i didn't know you knew that." 

"wanna talk about it?" samy offered, shifting herself around so she could see will better and still lay her head on him. 

the boy was silent for a moment, his fingers still drawing mindless shapes into samy's skin. opening up wasn't easy for will, but he'd gotten better since him and samy started dating. she just patiently waited until he was ready knowing he'd start talking eventually.

"for some reason i can't stop thinking about leaving you for california next year," the blonde finally got out. samy's face softened as she reached up to caress his cheek. 

"any reason why it's been on your mind?" the girl wondered as will leaned into her touch, briefly closing his eyes as he enjoyed the feeling of her hand on him. 

"i don't know. maybe because this time next year we'll be across the country from one another," will mumbled a bit sadly. 

"true, but you'll be doing something you love and have dreamed of doing since we were kids. you'll have so many new friends," samy tried looking on the bright side for him. 

"it won't be the same without you there. i've never done this without you before," will commented making samy flush. it was true that she'd been with will through his entire hockey journey. 

even when they were kids, she was going places with him and cheering him on from the stands. it was hard to think about the fact that next year they wouldn't be together. samy had obligations to finish out school and continue with soccer before she could even think about following will out to san jose. 

"it will only be for two years. it will fly by," samy tried a different approach. the blonde could only shrug though. clearly, this was plaguing his mind much more than samy thought. 

"what if we can't do long distance? what if our relationship can't handle it?" will started rambling his "what if's." the brunette frowned. will didn't get anxious a lot, but when he did, it definitely took a toll on him. 

"i mean..i can't say for certain, but i'd like to think that we can do long distance. there were months that we spent apart when we were younger and didn't see each other until summer," samy rubbed will's arm, trying to ease his now racing thoughts. 

"that was different. that was before i realized i liked you and i wanted to spend the rest of my life with you," his words had samy blushing again as she quickly hid her face in his chest before he saw. 

"i guess it's just that all my life i've been focused on hockey and i never thought i'd have someone that makes me want to stay. i'm scared of being away from you because i've never felt this strongly about someone before until i realized you've been right in front of me all along," will admitted. his words took samy by surprise because she never knew he felt that way about her. 

"will.." the brunette flushed and tugged her arms around her boyfriend. 

"sorry, that was really sentimental," the blonde flushed, but samy shook her head. 

"no, don't apologize. i feel the same way. i've always been so dialed into whatever sport i play i also never thought i'd have someone. i'm glad you're the someone i have though," the girl grinned. will quickly returned her smile, placing little kisses all over her face. 

"i know it's scary, but the two years will fly by. plus, we still have right now. we have another whole year of college to get through before we start thinking about long distance and california and everything," samy said softly. 

"you're right. i gotta get out of my own head," will chuckled. 

"i love you, will." 

"i love you too sweet girl," will smiled and brought his lips down to connect with hers. 

after a moment, will's lips started moving down. he attached them to samy's neck, kissing little marks into her skin before he continued down to her collarbone and chest. the girl flushed as her hands dragged through his hair, occasionally pulling when will kissed particularly hard in a spot. 

"you're gonna make me get chirped at," samy mumbled with a small laugh. she knew her teammates would have a field day when they saw the marks, but she also couldn't get herself to pull will's lips from her skin. 

"is that a problem?" will met her gaze, a smug expression on his face 

"people are gonna stare," not that samy cared if they stared. she just knew the girls would go crazy later. 

"so? let them stare. they'll know you're mine," will almost grumbled the last part. 

will wasn't necessarily the jealous type, but he liked making sure people knew what was his and right now he had a strong urge to make sure everyone would know. samy reached up to start nipping at will's own neck, trying to return the favor. she knew she couldn't leave marks where any skin would be visible on the ice, so she tried pushing her lips further down. 

will let samy flip them over so he was sitting against the headboard. she continued working her way down to his chest where she knew she could suck pretty hickeys into his chest. his skin grew warmer under her touch, face flushing at the affection. 

"you're gonna get me chirped at," the boy mumbled, but a smile sat on his lips which indicated that he didn't care. 

"it's not like it hasn't happened before," samy giggled making will's cheeks blush for probably the 10th time that morning. 

she leaned back, admiring the work and the pretty marks forming across his skin. "maybe we should head downstairs before the guys start wondering," samy laughed, making a move to get up but will held her down again. 

"five more minutes?" the blonde grinned, a pleading look in his eyes. 

samy rolled her eyes, but she gave in. time with will was precious and she didn't care if they spent the entire day in bed as long as it was with him. 

[strawberryblue-blog]

Sea of love. Part 2. —Fermin Lopez.

Part 1.

warnings: none. fight, curses, angst.

words count: +3.5k.

#SEXYNOTE: English is not my first language. I apologize if there are errors since i use the translator mostly. thanks for the support 🫶🏻 there will be new news soon stay tuned 💙🎀

A kiss on your shoulder woke you up in the hot summer morning, you sighed with a half smile as you stretched your body, feeling your muscles groan.

A smiling, morning Fermin welcomed you when you opened your eyes, looking at his perfect face seeing you waking up.

"Good morning, princess" he whispered kindly when his face met yours.

"Good morning, Fermin" you greeted caressing his hand.

Fermin approached your lips and smiled broadly before he began to kiss you softly. You couldn't remember or count how many times you two had kissed last night. It was all so sudden, so special that you couldn't separate after your night at sea.

The young man leaned down between your legs, resting his weight on the mattress so as not to crush you and covering your naked body, starting to leave a trail of wet kisses around your chest.

You smiled when you felt a tingle on your skin, giggling a little.

"You look so gorgeous" he winked his eye flirtatiously. "I wish I could kiss you forever" he sighed hugging you to him.

Feelings stirred in your belly and stirred as you felt his warm lips on your skin. You two had wasted no time after that night and snuck out every night of your vacation together to make love until the wee hours of the morning. Sometimes you had to meet in secret places in order to see each other, especially when Gavi was around. Although you felt a little bad about doing everything behind your brother and friends' backs, you had no choice but to just enjoy themselves when they were alone. But you were ashamed to admit that it was more exciting and dangerous and the adrenaline was something you enjoyed.

A current echoed in your back.

What would Gavi say if he found out right now that Fermin, his best friend, had fucked you? What would he say if he found out that you were secretly loving each other? Would he accept that you were dating Fermin? The questions had haunted you all these days and you were planning what to do but now it was time to enjoy themselves.

You had tried to act as normal as possible all this time, not talking or looking at each other but inevitably touching when they passed by or no one was looking. At least for now everything was quiet and you had little time left to go back to Barcelona, where everything would be a little easier since you lived alone and Fermín could visit you whenever he wanted.

A sad grimace appeared on your face. You hated lying to Gavi. You hated hiding things from your friends, but you couldn't tell anyone, at least not until you were sure it would work. That could lead to serious problems and now that you finally had each other, you didn't want to distance yourself or stop loving each other.

"What's that little face?" he questioned amused, taking you by the waist. You sat against his chest and Fermin hugged you.

You shook your head with a smile so as not to worry him. It wasn't the time to talk about it.

"Did you know that when you took my hand in elementary school I didn't wash it for a week?" you asked him recalling some of your more embarrassing memories.

Fermin burst out laughing.

"You were obsessed with me" he joked tickling you.

"Sorry, Mr. Perfect" you laughed between groans at his tickling.

"I was too, cutie" he admitted. "When we had sleepovers with the guys I used to sneak out to see if you were awake at night" he said nostalgically and kissed your shoulder gently.

A smile appeared on your lips as you remembered every moment you had lived with Fermín. Your friendship had been something meaningful so much so that now you were here, completely in love with each other.

"Do you want to know something?" he asked as you traced imaginary drawings along his arm.

You nodded curiously, turning to look at him.

"I've only been in love with one woman in my entire life" he said smiling. "You" took your hand and your heart skipped a beat.

Feelings bloomed in your chest making you feel your cheeks burn. He had also been the only man who had been on your mind since you were little, even though you had been with others, he was the only one who really had a place in your heart.

"And you are the only man I have loved for as long as I can remember" you confessed shyly and Fermin hugged you tenderly.

"I love you so much" he whispered. "At last I can say it without barriers"

A few days ago Fermín had confessed to you that he had promised Pablo that he would never touch you and that he had felt pressured all this time. So Fermin respected Pablo and respected your friendship but now he had understood for love there were no barriers. He told you that he had done everything to forget you, because he could not fail his best friend but he could not fail his heart either.

He hated feeling that way. Seeing you with other guys, enjoying your youth and not being able to be with you. He had even hit someone for you one day. He always put up with it but he couldn't do it when someone played with you. Not when he saw you with a guy at the bar, one who wasn't him and treated you like just another girl. An idiot who didn't love you like he did. An idiot who didn't respect you or deserve you like he did.

Those little moments that fed your hope that he loved you too but then said he did it because of his codes with Pablo. Because it was his responsibility to take care of you when he wasn't around.

All those years of friendship, of hiding your feelings, of looking at each other sideways, of pretending, you could finally let your bodies speak for themselves. You're here, loving and caring for each other.

"I thought about walking away from you, but i couldn't. I kept coming back to you every time, when I least expected it" he continued.

"Fermin, stop talking and make love to me again, please" you begged impatiently grabbing him by the shoulders to pull him closer to your mouth.

His lips latched onto yours and he licked them wildly, running his hands down the length of your legs, caressing you gently. You belonged to each other, soul and mind.

Fermin was yours and you were his.

"Baby, I want to love you so much" he whispered as you kissed and caressed each other at the same time.

"You do it so well, Fermin" you encouraged taking his face in hands. "I'm yours" you admitted blind from his caresses.

One of his hands grabbed your ass squeezing you as you hung on his neck. His kisses trailed down your neck biting down to mark you.

A screeching sound startled you both, interrupting your lovemaking session.

"Y/n, it's too late!" someone shouted opening the door and your hearts stopped.

Your body trembled when Pablo's pale face looked at you with some suspicion and confusion. You swallowed saliva blinking covering yourself and moving away from Fermin but it was too late.

The silence was overpowering, the mood was crisp. Gavi's eyes shattered like glass at the sight of you together on the bed.

"P-Pablo..." you called out to him as you saw him getting angry. You wanted to get up to grab the shirt from the floor but Pablo was already on top of Fermin grabbing him by the neck.

"Fucking asshole!" spat Gavi giving Fermin a sharp punch in the face, starting to curse between grunts.

Horrified you dressed with the first thing you found yelling at him to stop. But Pablo didn't, he kept slapping and cursing Fermin.

"Traitor, how could you?" he shouted in disappointment.

You jumped at him trying to defend him, you grabbed his arms and managed to pull him away from Fermin, who was trying to talk to explain but Gavi wouldn't let.

"Pablo, stop it!" you held him in tears, but he was forcing to try to escape from you. "It's not his fault!" you shrieked trying to calm him down.

"You're my fucking best friend!" he pointed at him, sitting him down.

You saw Pedro and Ferran peek into the room but it was too late, Pablo had calmed down although he was still shooting fire out of his ears. You signaled them to leave and they quickly left the room in understanding.

They were both in a state of shock and clearly Gavi was too.

"You're right" he said looking at you just as disappointed. "It's your fault too" his eyes glazed over.

You could notice something in his gaze that you had never seen in your brother's gaze before. Disappointment. As if they had broken his heart and it broke yours.

"Pablo, please" you sobbed grabbing his forearm.

He let go of your grip pulling away from you.

"It was the one thing you didn't have to do" he spoke to the boy, now wiping his blood on his lip. Tears trickled down your cheeks and you tried to move closer to your brother but he stopped you.

He was angry, you understood. But you wanted to explain. This wasn't about betrayal or codes, it was about love.

"Gavi, brother" Fermin tried to speak.

"I'm not your fucking brother!" he shouted angrily. "Not if you fuck my sister behind my back" he said for the last time before giving you a look like before and stormed out of the room slamming the door.

When you saw him leave, you fell on the floor crying desperately hugging yourself. Fermin immediately crawled on the floor, holding you in his arms, comforting you as his heart broke too.

Maybe Fermin had been right all along and you didn't belong together. Not if you hurt Pablo too. Now everything was broken. There was no turning back now and you felt guilty for putting Fermin in this situation.

Why couldn't it be like you had always dreamed? You could hear Gavi arguing with Pedro outside the room and your friends trying to calm him down and talk to him about what had happened but Gavi kept refusing. You had ruined everything. The vacations, his friendship, your family, everything.

Fermin planted a kiss on a hundred then helped you stand up and approach the bed.

"He hates me" you sobbed sadly. "You were right, it's my fault" you apologized crying.

Fermin denied. "He feels betrayed but he'll get over it. It's nobody's fault, princess" he caressed your arms, comforting you.

"But... we did that."

"I love you" he whispered cupping your cheeks, wiping away your tears. "Gavi will understand when it's time, he can't stay mad forever" he wrapped his arms around you pulling you closer to his chest.

You nodded sketching a smile.

"I love you, Fermin" you whispered. His lips kissed your head.

(...)

Going home after what happened was hard. Even when your friends tried to cheer you up and accompany you, you couldn't help but feel guilty. The trip home was long and not even getting a glance from Pablo was even harder. At least your friends were there for what you needed, since you and Fermin had decided to stay away until you returned to Barcelona and tried to patch things up with Pablo.

When you got home, you had let it take its time but after a few weeks you started trying to communicate with your brother. Your heart ached every time he dodged you, disappeared or ignored you. And you understood but you couldn't help but break down more and more every day.

Your parents and sister were back and you had already told them everything that had happened, they were happy for you and said he would get over it. You just had to give it time.

Your love with Fermin had grown now that you were free, loving each other when you needed each other most, supporting and understanding each other. You knew Gavi would understand, his heart was so kind but sometimes stubborn.

He had always understood you and Fermin too. If there was one thing that defined Pablo it was his kindness and empathy for others. It was only a matter of time before he accepted this. Or so you hoped.

You loved each other, you were not going to stop loving each other. Your destiny was written and could not be ignored. Sooner or later it would come. You weren't going to be able to hide it for much longer being so close and ignoring your feelings was only going to hurt you more.

"How was training?" you asked as they washed the dishes.

Fermin had come over after training to see you and you were dying to know if there was any progress in their friendship.

"Normal, you know" he replied lifting his shoulders. "Nothing important yet."

You snorted bringing your hands to your waist.

"Is he still ignoring you?" he asked with a grimace.

You nodded hugging him from behind.

"Me too" he said snorting.

"At least he agreed to bring me from Aurora's house yesterday" you sighed wistfully.

Yesterday they had gone to Aurora's house to have lunch with your family and after dinner, Pablo brought you home as they used to do every Friday. You thought he would refuse and that your parents would have to make a double trip but he agreed after Aurora convinced him. Still he didn't say a word, neither hello nor bye. It was intense and uncomfortable, you almost cried but at least it was something.

"Today he sat next to me in the locker room again and passed me the ball in the pre-game" Fermin recalled.

You smiled a little.

In one motion, you kissed Fermin on the lips, caressing his hair sinking your fingers into them. Gasping as you felt the butterflies flutter in your belly. 

"Do you think we did the right thing?" you questioned interrupting his kiss, Fermin looked at you confused.

"Loving each other" you replied.

He thought. "We didn't decide, it just happened."

"I know..." You fell silent as you felt the door to your apartment ring. Confused you raised an eyebrow.

"Go, I'll finish up here" Fermin said and you kissed his lips quickly letting go of the rag.

You ran to the door and opened it to see who it was.

"H-hello Pablo" you stammered seeing Gavi standing out there.

He scratched the back of his neck with a grimace.

"Hello" he said simply.

"What are you doing here?" you asked dumbfounded.

"Can I come in?" he questioned and you turned to see Fermin approaching behind you.

"Sure, come in" you said rushing over. You bit your lips nervously. Fermin gave you a look and you opened your eyes not understanding what was going on.

"I was passing by on my way home and thought I'd stop by" he walked in seeing his friend inside your house.

There was silence all of a sudden.

"Would you like something to drink?" asked Fermín kindly.

"I'm fine, thank you" he responded by sitting down on the couch when you instructed him to do so.

You were happy inside but tried to act normal, you didn't want to invade his space or pressure him. Fermin sat down next to you slowly and you looked at him slyly.

Again there was silence, the tension could be cut with a scissors. Everyone was nervous, for your part you didn't know what to expect. It was obvious that Gavi's visit had surprised them.

"I wanted to apologize..." he began sighing. "I'm sorry, Fermin" he apologized towards his friend. Fermin nodded smiling and you smiled too. "I'm sorry, Y/n" he also apologized to you.

"You don't have to apologize, Gavi" you said sincerely and he nodded.

If there was anyone who had to apologize it was you, it was completely normal Paul's reaction to the situation. You didn't blame him.

"We wanted to tell you but we didn't want to upset you..." you admitted guiltily.

"Our intention wasn't to hurt you, it just happened" Fermin finished saying to your nervousness and you smiled at me thanking him.

"I thought you would never notice" he mentioned with a small laugh. "I always knew that you liked each other" he remembered with nostalgia.

Surprised at his words you opened your eyes and gave a nervous laugh. Fermin looked at you and reached out his hand, grabbing yours to wrap it around him.

"I know you love each other" Gavi whispered "I always knew it, when you looked at each other, when you talked to each other, when you argued or joked with each other but denied each other because of me" he said with some sadness.

And it was true. Sometimes they were so obvious that even anyone who didn't know them could tell. But you had never thought that Gavi would notice. But it wasn't his fault. You had decided this as adults and if you had stayed away it had been to protect him.

"Pablo..." you sobbed running to him, sitting next to him to hug him. Your brother received your hug by caressing your forearm.

"I didn't mean to act like that, I was angry" he hid his face in your chest, you caressed his back comforting him. "I'm so sorry, I really am"

Fermin reached over, patting his friend's back.

"We should have never kept it from you" he sat down next to him as well.

"I was afraid" Gavi confessed. "I trust Fermin and I trust you too, Y/n. But if this didn't work out his would have to choose one of you and that wouldn't be fair" said your brother looking at you.

You both looked at each other, nodding. Fermin and you more than anyone else knew that was true. It was the reason you had stayed away all this time, the reason Fermin didn't reciprocate your feelings. But you also knew it wasn't going to happen.

They were so in love that they were going to make this work. Even if they didn't have Pablo's support. Their hearts were already bound together and they had hugged each other tight enough to let each other go.

"We were terrified too, Gavi" you said with a smile. "We couldn't stay apart anymore, we were hurting each other".

"We were going to tell you when we got back, we wanted to be sure about us and this" Fermin finished saying and you smiled at him. He always had the right words and you admired the problem solving skills he had.

Pablo nodded looking at you. His eyes now showed some pride and happiness, different from what you saw that night and that made you jump for joy.

"My best friend and my sister" he whispered with a smile. "My two favorite people in the world."

You stroked Pablo's hair tousling it a little. Fermin let out a laugh patting his happy friend's thigh.

"Shit, it really wasn't nice to see you almost fuck" he guffawed shaking his head.

Your cheeks flushed punching his shoulder, while Fermin kept laughing.

"Just respect my boundaries, okay?" he stood up from his spot. They both nodded. "And don't get her pregnant before time" he pointed his killer finger at Fermin.

"I swear, Gavi" the young man promised embarrassed.

Gavi nodded after taking one last look at their joined hands. Smiling when you rested your head on Fermin's shoulder.

"I'm leaving now" he announced kissing your forehead.

You took advantage of him coming closer and surrounded him completely hugging your brother. The warmth of his body made you think of your memories when you were little.

"Thank you, brother" you whispered gratefully.

His blessing was important to you, especially since he was part of your relationship as well. He was your brother and Fermin's best friend.

"Take care of her, amigo" he said greeting in a handshake to your boyfriend.

You smiled moving closer to Fermin and he hugged you by the shoulders, your hand took his. Gavi said goodbye opening the door before smiling at you for the last time.

Silence filled the room. You were perplexed, still trying to assimilate what had happened in there.

Your hearts jumping with excitement and happiness, your hands clutching tighter. Fermin raised your hands kissing the back gently.

"It's not a dream, is it?" you blinked squeezing Fermin's body.

"It's not, I think" he affirmed with a smile. "Or we both went crazy."

"That sounds more logical" you laughed looking at your boyfriend, his cheeks puffed out as he smiled back at you.

[alexendria-rose]

Part two of celebrity crush

Part one

A/n- it’s not really a part two but I loved making Instagram aesthetic for it lol so here’s just a little something 🤎

liked by y/nupdates and 4,729 others

your username: eye spy a little cutie 👀

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y/nupdates- oh my gosh! Finally a confirmation!

cumberbitch- omfg he could do so much better

y/nstand replies- girl you think that’s you or what?

zendaya- STOP THE HARD LAUNCH

benedict cumberbatch - and I spy with my little eye a gorgeous woman 🩷

martin freeman replies- hey I thought I was your gorgeous doctor!

yourinstagram replies- awh Martin don’t be sad, we can share.

benedict cumberbatch replies- sorry Martin she’s a lot cuter then you 😇🙃

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benedict cumberbatch: I love that she dances like nobody is watching.

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cumberbatchupdates- she looks so free spirited!

cumberbitch- my heart is broken 💔

y/nupdates replies- please shut up and let them enjoy their relationship.

yourinstagram- CUMBERBATCH WHEN DID YOU TAKE THIS PHOTO

benedict cumberbatch replies - you looked so happy and carefree. I had to capture the moment.

yourinstagram - you’re lucky that I love you

zendaya - if you think this is bad you should see her on set 👀

sydney sweeney replies - god it’s so bad! How many times she shook her ass to the soundtrack.

alexa demie replies - the soundtrack was dope. We both were shaking our ass together.

robert downey jr - y’all are adorable it’s sickening.

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yourinstagram: little behind the scenes before the show comes out tomorrow! Make sure to watch Eric 😉

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y/nupdates- wait are we going to get a y/n cameo! Please please.

cumberbitch replies- oh god I hope not

y/nstand replies - for the love of god shut the hell up please.

benedict cumberbatch- sneaking photos of me now?

yourinstagram replies- yes since someone likes to sneak photos of me, I had to get payback.

zendaya- 🥹

tom holland - look at my babysitter.

benedict cumberbatch replies - your the reason why my fans call me a babysitter, if someone didn’t spoil!

tom holland replies - I like you being my babysitter, your more fun then Anthony and Sebastian.

sebastian stan replies - rude

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yourinstagram: Surprise 💍 #finally

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Y/nupdates - NO WAY OUR FAVORITE COUPLE

cumberbitch - NO

y/nstan replies - hahaha bitch get shit on

cumberbatchluv - WE LOVE Y/N🩷🩷

zendaya - no stop you finally posted lemme go cry.

sydney sweeney- look at our girl go 🥹

alexa demie replies - she’s growing up so fast.

yourinstagram replies - stop u guys are gonna make me cry fr

benedict cumberbatch - here’s to forever darling girl.

yourinstagram replies - forever and always my favorite British man 💍

tom holland replies - I thought I was your favorite !

yourinstagram replies - your my favorite British Tom.

tom hiddleston replies - okay rude, btw congratulations you two.

robert downy jr - damn that is one fat stone on your finger. Congratulations to the beautiful couple 🥂

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benedict cumberbatch: Marrying this girl in a week. Cannot wait 💍 #MrsCumberbatch

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yourinstagram - cannot wait to be Mrs Cumberbitch 😜

cumberbitch replies - this is rude

benedict cumberbatch replies - I cannot wait either my love 🥰

zendaya - she’s so cute. I want to marry her.

tom holland replies - you’re literally with me

yourinstagram replies - and I’ll take her from you, watch it holland

Marvel Official - My favorite couple.

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yourinstagram: Call me Mrs Cumberbatch please 👀💍

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y/nupdates - OMFG THE ROYAL WEDDING HAPPENED

cumberbitch replies - I wouldn’t call it anything… 🤦‍♀️

y/nstan replies - ISTG BITCH LEAVE PLEASE

robert downy jr - this was such a beautiful wedding, I almost cried.

anthony mackie replies - almost? You did!

tom holland replies - I’m sorry mr downy but you did.

zendaya - GO BESTIE GO BESTIE, I still cannot believe I was the maid of honor

sydney sweeney replies - me too, I mean I’m obviously better.

alexa demie - yall stfu it’s her wedding

yourinstagram - yall were all beautiful bridesmaids, and thank you for being a part of the day 🩷

benedict cumberbatch - Hello Mrs Cumberbatch 😉

yourinsagram replies - Hi Mr Cumberbatch 😉 I love you husband.

benedict cumberbatch replies - I love you most dear wife

Marvel Official - not Benedict and Y/n being the main characters. Congratulations 🥂

martin freeman - 😭😭 look at my guy go, I love you guys such a beautiful wedding. Congratulations 🤎