#but i got a little stuck after finishing the last one i wrote for them

[pepperonijem]

iii. tell me your favorite love song || to.you

"i wanna sing it with you."

summary: Council meeting! It's time for you to reminisce on failed dates and first confessions with Eren, Mikasa, Armin, and Jean! pairing: Levi Ackerman x gn!reader content: cursing, floch slander lol songs mentioned: completely - jaehyun

A/N: this chapter is definitely more filler, but I had to split it up because it was hitting well over 10k words for one chapter lol.

let me know if you'd like to be tagged! comments and rb's are appreciated :)

previous chapter || masterlist || next chapter

“Did you… Did you write that yourself?”

The last note from the piano seemed to echo through the room for a while before Levi finally turned to look at you.

“Yeah,” he answered quietly. “Just finished it last night actually.” Levi looked down at the piano keys as his fingers ghosted over them, touching them with enough pressure to push down but not make a sound. “What did you think of it?” he asked. He seemed more vulnerable than you had seen him before, like you were seeing him in a way he wasn’t even used to seeing himself.

“It’s really good,” you answered. You weren’t really sure what else to say. It was good, it felt personal, like something more than just a catchy song. He had used your words, that had to mean something, but you weren’t sure what. “Was that part about the coffee–”

“From you?” Levi interrupted. Although he was looking away from you, you could see his ears turn pink. “Yeah, it was. I’m glad you noticed.”

You felt something flutter away at your chest. “I’m glad I could help you out,” you replied. If he wasn’t going to say anything more than that, then you would just take it for what it was. Levi nodded but didn’t reply. “I’m really flattered that I got to hear it first.”

Levi finally looked up at you. “Of course,” his head tilted. “Who else would I play it for?” As if it was the most obvious thing.

You’re sure your eyes widened in surprise and your cheeks definitely went pink, because almost immediately, Levi coughed and added, “You helped me write it so obviously you’d hear it first.” Right. That’s all. He was just offering something in return.

“Oh,” you began. Not sure if the sigh that escaped your lips was relief or disappointment. “Well if you ever need to write another song, you know where to find me. Though maybe I should start charging.” You hoped your tone was as light and playful as you intended it to be.

Levi let out a soft chuckle as he shook his head. Good. “Name your price.” 

Before you could add on, his phone buzzed against the wood of the piano before he reached out to check it.

“It’s Hange,” he explained. “Apparently we have band practice in 20.” He pocketed his phone before turning back to you with an apologetic smile. “I’ll see you around?”

His eyes seemed to twinkle under the fluorescents of the practice room and you felt your heart thud against your chest. He smiled. “See you around.”

Levi left right after that, and you found yourself stuck in the room thinking about his song. Your fingers pressed against some of the keys that you remember him playing, as if looking for a code to see what he was thinking. It felt… electric, to have something, not quite a secret, between the two of you. You couldn’t help but imagine him singing it on stage, no one else knowing that a little bit of you existed in the lyrics of his song. 

You found yourself wishing that you could hear him sing your song — the song about yo– the song he wrote that just so happened to include your words and seemed to describe exactly how you were feeling about him – again. Maybe he’d say it was for you.

Maybe he’d say it was how he felt about you too.

Later that night, you found yourself at Eren and Mikasa’s place, laying on their sofa with your head in Mikasa’s lap. You had sent out a text to your group chat, in desperate need of more minds on the case. A knock sounded on the door and Eren stood up to answer the door. You heard him groan immediately as it swung open.

“Why the hell are you here?” Eren spoke. It was immediately obvious from his lack of enthusiasm that he was not speaking to Armin.

You heard Armin’s voice reply. “I heard this was a council meeting,” he explained nonchalantly as he walked in with two boxes of pizza and a smug looking Jean behind him. “I saw Jean on my way here and figured he could be helpful.” The two of them smiled and waved as they walked into the living room and set the pizzas down on the coffee table.

“I don’t let strays into my place, Armin,” Eren huffed as he shut the door behind him, letting Jean into his place anyway.

Mikasa rolled her eyes and you chuckled as she chastised Eren. “Whatever, babe,” you felt her chuckle. “Just last week you pulled over in the parking garage and caused a 15 minute traffic jam because you stopped to pick up a lost cat.”

Eren’s cheeks reddened as he relented. Pouty as he was, he could never say no to Mikasa. Walking over, he lifted your legs as he sat down next to her before letting you rest them in his lap. “You didn’t need to announce it,” he whined as Mikasa leaned over to kiss his cheek.

“Anyway,” Armin chuckled, moving to sit beside Jean against the coffee table and facing the three of you. “We haven’t called a council meeting like this since Eren went through his emo phase.” Armin looked over at Jean as he explained.

“You would have an emo phase,” Jean sneered at Eren.

“You probably had one too, dickhead.” Eren countered.

“Yeah, if you count Justin Bieber as emo,” Jean rolled his eyes.

“Jean…” Armin began softly. “That’s… that’s not any better.” Armin patted his back as Jean looked away in embarrassment. Everyone laughed lightheartedly at that, even Jean… eventually.

“Okay,” you began, drawing out the last syllable. “Now that we’ve determined that Eren and Jean are both dorks, we can get to the problem at hand.”

“Hey!” Eren and Jean both shouted in offense. 

You sat up and reached for a slice of pizza before you continued. You weren’t particularly sure of how to approach the subject, but you also knew that after five seconds of silence, Eren would begin prodding at you. Maybe it was like ripping off a bandaid?

“I think Levi likes me.”

The silence was deafening. You weren’t really sure what to expect, but silence from everyone, especially Eren, was not it. Mikasa, definitely. Armin, maybe, he liked to think before he responded. Jean, from what you’d come to know, tended to hold off on offering advice until he heard others’ perspectives. Eren, however, was always one to speak whatever was in his mind, to refine his thoughts aloud.

“Did you all hear me? I said–”

“No, we heard you the first time,” Eren said, still staring at you with wide eyes. “Levi? Like 5’3” lead singer of No Name that looks like he wants to beat my ass every 10 minutes, Levi?”

You nodded back. Looking around the room, everyone seemed to be in a similar state of shock. Mikasa was resting her chin on a closed fist and her eyes were full of intrigue. Armin had a brow raised quizzingly, and Jean’s mouth was wide open until something settled in his brain and his lips pressed together in a smirk.

“I totally called it,” Jean beamed. “Didn’t I tell you he was singing right at you that one night?” 

You recalled Jean’s words from the first Halloween party you saw Levi at and you nodded. Levi did seem to have his eye on you that time.

“Nope, no, no,” Eren stood up. There was the Eren you knew. You sat up as well.“Levi doesn’t sing to people, he just sings and then glares from the stage. He glares at everyone.”

Eren also had a point. You’d known Levi to be exceptionally grouchy, and to make no exceptions for who he glares at. Maybe he was glaring at you for dancing with Jean, who he didn’t seem too fond of.

“What makes you think he likes you?” Armin asked curiously.

“I… He wrote a song about me?” you offered sheepishly as Eren’s eyes somehow got wider.

“He what?” Everyone asked in unison.

“I–” you stammered. “Well he never said it was about me, but he did use my line.”

Eren was pacing around the room now. “What was the line he used?”

“Something about the first coffee shop run in autumn.”

Recognition lit up in his eyes as you mentioned the lyric and he paused his movements. “He also used a line from Erwin in that song,” Eren thought aloud. “And I think he had a line about the drums that Hange had said about Miche.”

Oh, you thought to yourself. You couldn’t help but feel… disappointed. Eren’s words were sobering, and you felt yourself shrink. It was true, you had only met him a handful of times. Why would he write about you? Mikasa seemed to sense your deflating mood because she leaned over to wrap an arm around you. You smiled at her in return. 

Upon noticing your mood, Eren let out a sigh. He sat back down beside you and when he spoke again, his voice was softer. “Look, it’s not that I don’t want him to like you,” he began. “It’s just that… well, Levi’s the most emotionally unavailable guy I know. I’ve never so much as heard him say the word ‘happy’ outside of a song. I just don’t want you to build him up in your head just to get hurt by reality.” He looked at you knowingly.

Armin nodded along. “Eren’s right,” he agreed. “Being in love with the idea of someone is as good as handing your heart over to be broken. You shouldn’t have to put yourself through that again.” 

Again.

You remember that night freshman year that you were supposed to go on a date with a guy named Floch.

Floch had come up to where you and Eren were sitting and having lunch out on the quad. It was a breezy spring morning and you recall the way Floch’s red hair blew across his face as he approached the two of you with an easy smile. You gave Eren a ‘do you know this guy?’ look as he shook his head no.

“Hey,” he had said to you, pointedly ignoring Eren. 

“Hey…” you answered politely but cautiously as you looked over at Eren. Eren was eyeing him suspiciously.

“I just wanted to let you know how good you look in this light,” he spoke again with a charming smile and his hand extended out for a handshake. “I’m Floch.” You blushed at him and slipped your hand in his as you introduced yourself. Eren’s eyes sharpened into a dangerous glare when Floch twisted your hand in his and brushed his lips against your knuckles. He coughed and finally drew the redhead’s attention to him. 

“I’m Eren,” he said and reached his hand out, knuckles up, to mock Floch.

Floch simply laughed and nodded his head. His eyes fixed into a cold stare that contrasted his smile. “Hey man.” 

Floch reached over for one of the napkins that sat between you and Eren and pulled out of a pen and wrote down his number. “Text me?” And when you nodded, he walked away, back to his group of friends who jovially patted him on the back at his return.

“That guy is an absolute creep,” Eren breathed out, not bothering to wait for him to be completely out of earshot.

“Eren…” you warned. “He seemed nice, and he was kind of cute.” You pulled out your phone.

“He looks like half the guys on this campus,” Eren rolled his eyes as he looked at the number written on your napkin. “Don’t text him.”

“Too late,” you replied, as you hit send on a message.

Once Mikasa and Armin found out about it, they were on his side. 

Floch had asked you out on a date immediately upon seeing your message and that Friday night, Armin and Eren had come over to the dorm room that you and Mikasa shared. You were in the middle of getting ready, still trying to settle on an outfit and the two of them were sitting on Mikasa’s twin bed watching you with interest. 

Mikasa stood by you at your wardrobe, helping you pick and choose tops for your outfit while Armin deeply sighed.

“Are you sure we can’t convince you to not go?” Mikasa prodded even as she handed you another piece. You held it against your body to check it in your reflection before shaking your head and handing it to her.

“Guys,” you pleaded. “I really like him. I don’t see what the issue is.”

You watched Eren scoff and make eye contact with you in the mirror. His bright eyes watching yours carefully. “I can give you a list. Alphabetized even.”

You turned to glare at him. “Bite me, Yaeger.” Floch had joined you and Eren and Armin for lunch the next afternoon with a fully cooked meal for you and a bouquet of flowers, and since then, you and Eren had been arguing about him since then. Even Armin was skeptical of him and how he seemed to love-bomb you, as he called it, right after meeting you. “It’s nice to be with a guy that’s so direct about how he feels about me.”

“That’s the problem,” Armin spoke up. “Isn’t he a little too interested? The flowers, coming to your classes with breakfast, like that’s nice, but you’ve known him for all of two days. He hasn’t even asked about your major.”

You chewed your lip. You could argue with Eren all day long, but Armin had always been able to get you to see reason, even if you chose to ignore it. Which you did. There was only 15 minutes left before the time Floch said he’d pick you up, and you decided you were too far in to text him now.

“Armin’s right,” Mikasa said. “And he’s been a shit texter, hasn’t he?”

“Okay, but not everyone is a good texter,” you argued. You grabbed one last outfit option and walked into the bathroom to change. “Misa, you barely send five words in a single text on a good day.” You walked back out after changing and watched as Armin and Eren and Mikasa gave you a reluctant thumbs up.

You settled onto your own bed and Mikasa sat beside you and fussed with the collar of your top. “Shouldn’t that jackass be here soon?” Eren sighed.

“Yeah,” you replied. “He said 7, so five more minutes.”

At 7 p.m., Floch was nowhere to be found.

At 7:15 p.m. he hadn’t answered any of your texts.

At 7:38 p.m. you got a call from Floch. Who butt-dialed you. From the club. With his friends who congratulated him on getting a girl to fall for him in a record-breaking five days.

At 7:45 you were crying into Mikasa’s arms.

At 8 p.m. Eren said, “A guy who likes you isn’t going to see you as a challenge to be won.”

“Woah woah woah,” Jean chimed in. “How do you know that he’s emotionally unavailable?”

Jean’s voice brought you back to the situation at hand.

You’re not quite sure why you were suddenly feeling defensive. Armin and Eren had only ever looked out for your best interests, especially after that incident with Floch. But when you remember how shy Levi got after he finished playing, and how open he was with you the night before, a part of you desperately wanted them to be wrong.

“Have you met him?” Mikasa chuckled. “That man is the definition of ‘if looks could kill.’ He only looks nice when he’s on stage.”

“Well he can’t be all bad if he can write songs that are so… personal” Jean continued to ask. Armin was right to bring him. His presence was refreshing. 

“You somehow manage to be passing psych when you’re an absolute dumbass,” Eren countered. Mikasa swatted at him and he immediately folded. “Sorry. Instinct. What I meant to say was that Levi holds his cards close to his chest, not necessarily that he doesn’t have feelings.”

“My question still stands,” Jean replied. “How can you write songs like that and be emotionally unavailable?”

Eren looked at him with frustration. “It’s not that hard,” he retorted.

Again, Mikasa swatted at his arm and shot him a glare.

“I mean I imagine it’s not that hard.”

Jean rolled his eyes before continuing. “No offense dude,” he began as Eren scowled at him. “But you are the biggest loverboy I’ve ever met. It’s pretty obvious which songs you had a hand in writing because they’re so very clearly about Mikasa and so very clearly written by a simp.” 

“First of all, how would you know?” Eren accused. “And second of all… which songs?” he blushed as Jean smirked. He was a lot more perceptive than he let on.

Jean cleared his throat as he began to sing… croak, more like. 

“Oh, show me a map of your soul Every second from now I’m gonna love you completely.”

Jean only stopped when Eren lobbed a pillow at his face, but it didn’t stop him from laughing. That was the song you’d danced with Jean to the first night. 

He was right. 

Eren wrote that song when the four of you were still in high school, when he and Mikasa had first started dating. It was the night of the winter formal and you, him, and Armin had spent weeks coming up with the perfect plan for him to confess to her and Eren was more nervous than you’d ever seen him.

“Are you guys sure I have to tell her?” Eren had sweat dripping down his forehead even as you stood on the balcony of the ballroom in the middle of December. He had already pulled his coat off, left only in his white button up and red tie, both of which he’d undone a bit to try to cool himself off.

“Yes!” you and Armin both cried out.

“But what if she hates me after this?”

“Do you know how stupid you sound right now?” you scoffed at him, your breath coming out in puffs in front of you.

“But–”

“No buts, Eren,” Armin chastised. “Mikasa deserves to know.”

“And you both deserve to be happy,” you added. “She’s going to love this.”

Eren, with a nod of determination, reached for his guitar case and shook his fingers out, trying to warm them up. Armin gave you a quick nod and you were thankful to be able to get out of the cold.

You walked back into the ballroom to find Mikasa already wearing a coat. The dancing was still in full swing and the band that the school had hired was playing some slow jazz standards. Under the glow of the warm lights, you could see your hands regaining color after having to hype your nervous friend up for over 20 minutes in the cold. She smiled when she saw you approach. “Headed somewhere?” you had asked her.

“Yeah,” she sighed. “I couldn’t find you guys, so I thought I’d go out to the balcony for a breather.”

Perfect. You smiled sweetly at her as she raised an eyebrow. She knew something was up, but Mikasa in all her kindness was never one to fight against one of your schemes. “Oh? I’ll walk you out.”

You slipped your arm into hers and reached for your phone with your other hand, shooting Armin a text, telling him to clear out. He found the two of you just as you reached the french doors. His cheeks were pale with a bright spot of red that stretched across his cheeks and his blonde hair was disheveled from the wind.

“Oh hey,” Armin said casually. He pulled you away from Mikasa as she looked at the two of you with confusion. “Sorry, we just have to, uh, discuss some things. But the balcony’s free.”

“Thanks…” Mikasa said skeptically. The two of you watched as she finally walked out of eyesight before Armin grabbed you by the wrist and dragged you upstairs to another balcony. 

“Armin, you suck at bluffing,” you chuckled at him as he rolled his eyes.

Once you were both settled, you and Armin headed towards the railing. You could hear Eren’s voice crack as he spoke to Mikasa, “I wrote a song for you.” Armin looked at you curiously as you reached for the tie of your coat and began to wrap it around your phone.

“What the hell are you doing?” Armin whisper-shouted to you. He made no moves to stop you. 

“They’ll want a video of this,” you explained matter-of-factly. “Now hand me your tie, it’s not long enough.”

With a roll of his eyes, he obeyed and you knotted the two ties together. Armin made sure the phone was secure and hit record before leaning over the balcony to dangle your phone over the edge. You and Armin both listened in awe as you listened to Eren sing. 

It wasn’t the first time you’d heard him play the guitar, but it was the first time you’d heard his voice. You didn’t think he had it in him to carry a tune, honestly, but he did surprisingly well.

Jean’s voice snapped you out of your memories. “Was I right?” he questioned smugly.

Mikasa smiled as she looked over at a blushing Eren. “Yeah, you were.”

“See?” he raised an eyebrow at you as he continued. “All I’m saying is that maybe that song was about you, and maybe he only knows how to express his feelings through music. I don’t think it’s a reach.” Jean put his hands up in defense as he finished his statement.

“Well look,” Armin conceded. “Jean has a point. Some people are better at expressing themselves in other ways, like some people are acts of service people.” He pointed over at you. “Like how you make sure Eren and Jean always have class notes when they need it.”

He pointed at Mikasa. “Physical touch,” he explained. “You don’t say much, but you know when to put an arm around someone who’s sad.” 

Finally at Jean. “Quality time.” Jean scoffed as he wondered how Armin read him so easily. “You don’t have to hang out with us if you don’t want to, but you’re here.”

“Whatever,” Jean mumbled, but his cheeks turned pink anyway. Jean was perceptive, but Armin could read any person and a situation upside down and backwards.

“Well how does that help me?” you asked. “We can speculate about Levi’s feelings all day long… but I’d like to have a concrete answer.”

Armin’s eyes lit up as he devised a plan.

“Eren, what did you say your psych project was again?”

“To spend time with… oh no,” Eren trailed off as he watched the all too familiar mischievous glint in Armin’s eyes. He sat up straighter. “Armin, don’t include me in your plans.” “What?” Jean asked. “What are you planning, blondie?”

“Well, if you and Levi just so happen to do things together, and Jean and Eren just so happen to be there too,” Armin explained with a smug smile. “Then you can have them keep track of whether or not there are signs that Levi’s actually into you.”

Eren groaned as Jean laughed heartily. “That sounds so fun, actually,” Jean said. Armin returned his grin.

“It really doesn’t,” Eren countered. “Why can’t you and Mikasa go?” he asked Armin.

“I’m busy working on my own projects,” Mikasa shrugged. She smiled smugly as she continued. “Armin has his capstone.” If Mikasa was on board, so was Eren, however reluctant he may be.

“So it has to be you and Jean,” Armin confirmed to Eren. “Plus you guys will keep each other balanced, since Eren is a skeptic and Jean is a believer. And you guys get a good grade on your project.”

“C’mon, jackass,” Jean rolled his eyes at Eren. “It’s only a few more weeks till the end of the semester.”

Usually, you and Armin were the schemers of the group. One of you would come up with a plan, and the other would be ready to make it happen. This time however, you had a weird feeling. Anticipation? Excitement? You didn’t have time to decide, because soon, all eyes were on you.

“What do you think?” Armin asked. You scanned their faces. Jean and Armin looked at you with excitement. Mikasa also seemed interested in this plan. Eren, though he tried to hide it, also raised an eyebrow in interest.

“Ah,” you sighed. “What the hell? Why not?”

a/n: originally, i was gonna make floch a guy who tried to date you to convince you to join a cult (bc surprisingly, when i was in university, cult recruitment was a big thing?) but decided to make him a jack-ass instead. also the idea of Eren being a "can i sing for u" type of guy is so funny to me and you can't convince me that if he had a little sibling he wouldn't be a protective overbearing little shit.

[im-still-watching-anime]

i hateeeee sskk so bad nearly a full year with absolutely NO new fic ideas for them then atsushi comments on akutagawa’s eyes one (1) time and suddenly i’ve got like four with no time to write ANY of them right now

[joelsgoldrush]

“crawl home to her” | 7.5k

old man!logan x f!reader

SUMMARY: Will he be able to control himself once he's near you? In this moment, he feels more animal than human. Creeping, on the verge of crawling, back to you. OR Like a sinner seeking absolution, he finds his way back to you after every absence, as if you're the only salvation he's ever known.

WARNINGS/TAGS: mdni smut 18+ cursing. drinking. dirty talk. some fluff. comfort. feelings. self-deprecation. miscommunication. sort of established relationship. age gap (reader's in her late 20s). petnames. religious imagery. logan's POV. chauffeur!logan. dom!logan. reader wears logan's dog tags and clothes. pussy pronouns. phone sex. oral sex (f and m receiving). 69. fingering. masturbation (he jerks off in the limo). one (1) single spank. sort of rough sex. unprotected p in v. creampie.

A/N: i wrote this as a part 2 of this story, but still, it can be read as a standalone (i'd recommend that you also read the first part as well 👀 you'll understand their relationship better). hope you like this one! <3

Logan is tired. Bone-deep, soul-crushingly tired.

He takes a slow, deliberate drag from his cigar, letting the smoke curl inside his chest, teasing his lungs. Doesn’t even bother to crack the window open—why would he?—before exhaling, the haze lingering inside the limo like a fog.

One quick glance at his phone screen just to make sure his vision isn’t screwing him over—no older notifications. A pang of disillusionment settles in his being.

Not only is he fighting to keep his eyes open, exhausted from driving the same family around for the past few days while they enjoy their quality time, but he’s also bored out of his mind. 

Where the hell are you?

He adjusts his glasses, pushing them higher up on the bridge of his nose, preventing them from sliding down to his lap. When his phone buzzes, he jolts, nearly hitting his head on the roof of the limo due to his excitement.

His poor heart gallops as he fumbles with the screen, unlocking it with the same urgency as a man starved for contact.

But it’s not you. It’s one of his passengers.

We’re getting out in half an hour, the message reads. By we, she means herself, her husband, and their two kids.

Logan can’t bring himself to type an actual reply, so he leaves her on read. She knows he’s not going anywhere, parked outside the arcade as if he’s rooted in place with no way out.

Family after family enters that hell on earth, kids of all ages bouncing on their heels, voices shrill with enthusiasm. He watches, half-heartedly, as parents get dragged by their little ones, who negotiate how much money they are allowed to spend tonight.

He almost feels bad for those parents. Almost. He hopes that at least they know how to say ‘No’.

All in all, he’s got another thirty minutes of solitude ahead. The radio has long since ceased to entertain him. He’s been parked here for two hours, and his mind is starting to drift. He could stretch his legs, walk around, or maybe grab a drink—but damn it.

He wants to talk to you.

You’d said he could call you after dropping the family off. That was three hours ago. The last message he received from you was still stuck in his head, replaying over and over like a lifeline. Logan knows you must be busy, probably taking care of Charles and—

Okay, he’ll get back to that later. 

You: Just got out of the shower. Call me in five?

Right now, he could die a happy man. Were he a dog, his tail would be wagging furiously, anticipation already building for the simple joy of hearing you.

Logan: Got it.

The next five minutes feel like an eternity. He finishes his cigar, flicking the stub beneath the seat without giving it a second thought. For now, he doesn’t care about being a messy fucker. He’ll deal with the mess some other time.

Priorities.

A quick spritz of some cheap air freshener he picked up from a gas station fills the car, masking the distinctive scent of smoke. God forbid the kids start whining about how ‘weird’ it smells in the limo.

With a grimace, he sprays a little more—floral, of all scents? It feels insulting.

How kind of him to still be this considerate.

His thumb hovers over your contact, and he presses the call button with an agility he hasn’t had in years (thanks to you).

One, two, three rings, and then—

“Logan,” you say softly, your voice a little breathless, like you’ve been hurrying all over the place.

He stops grinding his jaw, the tension in his shoulders easing. He unclenches his fists, fingers uncurling one by one, as if letting go of some invisible burden.

Outside the vehicle, people stop dying, babies stop being born, and the world itself pauses just for him to listen to you.

You can’t see him, but he smiles either way. “Hey, baby.”

“Gosh, I’m so sorry. I lost track of time talking to Charles. We had dinner, and then I just—I felt so gross, you know? From cooking and all that. Took a shower, and it got pretty late.”

You end with a sigh, and he imagines you rubbing a hand over your face. “Please tell me you weren’t sleeping when I texted you.”

“Not even close. Still waiting for them.”

“They’re really taking their time, huh?”

“You wouldn’t believe it,” he murmurs, his fingers drumming a soft rhythm on the steering wheel. “How was your day?”

“Great! I’m already in bed.”

“My bed.”

You laugh, that sweet sound making his heart stutter. “Well, yeah. Where else do you want me to sleep if I’m at your place? On the floor?”

If someone had told Logan a year ago that he’d let someone live in his space, let alone take care of Charles, he’d have scoffed. "Pathetic," he’d have said, rolling his eyes with that familiar growl in his throat. Pretty sure he’d also puffed his chest while saying so.

Because Logan Howlett wasn’t one for accepting help. He’s been on his own since the earth was still cooling down.

But for you? He made exceptions. Plenty of them. And if it weren’t for your altruism, he wouldn’t have accepted this job—a job that pays well enough to cover Charles’ meds and put food on the table. He needs this rich family’s money.

“You’ve got a girlfriend now?” Charles had asked, when Logan explained he’d be staying with you while he went away for a few days.

“Big word you’re using there,” Logan had replied, placing two pills into Charles’ palm. The old man gave him a death stare. “Don’t play dumb. It’s not like you don’t know the drill.”

Mumbling something incoherent before swallowing the pills, Charles had taken slow sips of water between each one, sinking back into the mattress with a weary sigh. “If she’s not your girlfriend, then what is she?”

“A friend.”

“That’s nice. Is that what they’re calling it now?”

He shakes that memory away, forcing his mind back to the call. “Try not to be so kind to him. What if he falls in love with you?” he inquires, a mocking tone weaving through his words. 

And that’s when you drop the bombshell. “You mean like you did?” 

You laugh, but Logan… doesn’t. He can’t do it. He makes sure he’s breathing on command: in and out, in and out, in and out. 

The mention of love unsettles him. He doesn’t feel safe anymore, doesn’t know what game you’re playing. Where’s the rulebook?

Is he—could he be—falling in love with you? Is that what you’re implying? And if so, do you feel the same?

In the long run, you mumble: “It was a joke.” Only then do his lungs fill with fresh air, untainted by the weight of his unease. But he can’t let it pass, the fact you sound disappointed. Defeated.

He promised himself he’d never hurt you. Though he doesn’t intend to, it feels as if he’s just stabbed you in the back, twisting the knife further into your frame—unwillingly.

“Remember the—” he pauses a moment, throwing his head back in frustration, silently cursing himself. “The pills. You’ve been giving them to him, right?”

“Yes, Logan.”

“Please, remember it’s only—”

“Logan,” you try again, cutting through the wave of his spiraling thoughts. He can picture you behind closed lids, looking at him through your lashes, your hand resting gently on his chest. “I have it under control, okay? He’s doing alright. I swear I’m taking good care of him.”

“I don’t doubt that, honey.” Casting a glance at the rearview mirror, he feels an unexpected sense of longing for your presence there, like a ghost haunting his every move, confined to the limits of his brain. “Can’t help but worry. That’s all.”

A soft hum reverberates through the line. He hears the rustle of sheets, the sound of you tossing around in his bed, and his pulse quickens at the thought.

“You said you’re sleepin’ on my bed.”

“Good memory you have.”

“You wearin’ my clothes as well?”

 Thick silence, the kind he relishes.

“Yeah,” you finally reply, shifting the phone from side to side. You take a deep breath, and add: “I forgot to bring mine.”

He hates how you easily find a way to get him riled up despite being miles away. It must be the power of words.

“I don’t believe you.” He knows he shouldn’t, hates himself for doing it, but one of his hands palms the half-hard bulge in his black slacks, suppressing a low groan. “Think you did it on purpose.”

A rush of heat, sharp and urgent, washes over him. Is he really about to do this? Get himself off in the very car he uses for work? Twisted, incredibly sick of him, he thinks.

Still, he craves more. “Tell me what you’re wearing.”

You laugh at his demanding tone, fanning the flames of his desperation. “When did you turn into a horny teenager?”

“Always been, baby,” Logan purrs, undoing the button of his pants, followed by the fly. His eyes flick upwards for just a moment—no cars, no one in sight. He’s presumably alone. It’s all the confirmation he needs to say: “C’mon. Tell your old man what clothes you stole from him.”

He’s never done this before—phone sex. He’s heard about it, sure, but never imagined he’d fall so hard for the idea. The thrill of it sinks into him, electrifying.

What are you doing? Is your lip caught between your teeth? Do your eyes wander down your own body? Maybe your fingers are already skimming over your skin.

“It’s just a random shirt,” you murmur. “Plain, white.”

“What else?”

“There’s nothing else.”

Logan’s breath hitches as his hand moves to his cock, spotting the damp patch on his briefs where the tip has already started to leak. The moment he slides the elastic down past his balls, he fists his shaft in a slow stroke, going from the base to the head. “No panties? And you expect me t’believe this wasn’t planned?”

Your muffled whimper is like molten lava spilling into his ear, bringing him to full hardness. More shuffling follows on your end, driving him wild with the anticipation. “Why do you do this to me if you’re not here?”

“‘Cause I want you touchin’ yourself just like I’m doin’.” He thumbs the head, hips jerking involuntarily at the sensation. He aches to feel your mouth there instead. “Bet that pussy’s been cryin’ out for me, huh? Must’ve got used to me fillin’ her every other night.”

Your breathing grows more uneven, small gasps filtering through the speaker. “I need you here with me. This is—ugh—not enough.”

“What’s not enough, sweetheart?”

There’s a pause as the sound of your phone shifts again, and then he hears it clearly—the wet, needy sound of your fingers working between your legs, filling the silence with the loud squelching of your cunt. “My fingers,” you blurt out, more distant than before, like you’re merging with the bed, dissolving with every touch.

Logan spits roughly into his palm, the slickness of his saliva easing the drag of his calloused hand along his length, good enough to make the movement more satisfying.

He moans aloud, eyes shut tight, your name slipping from his lips, a whispered prayer, as if saying it could somehow summon you to his side. “I spoil you too much,” he rasps, wedging his phone between his ear and shoulder, using every resource available to him, anything to feel something real. “Seems like you’ve forgotten how to make yourself come.”

Your moans follow his, the breathy sounds a clear sign of how close you are, hanging on the edge, your release just a heartbeat away. But it’s not enough, and you need him. He wonders if you can feel his thoughts from miles away, because— “Want your cock so bad, Lo. I m-miss you.”

He has to stop jerking himself to hold off his orgasm, stomping his foot against the pedals. “Fuck, darlin’. You keep sayin’ those things and I swear I’ll be back with you by morning.”

His sole focus now is you—getting you to come. Driven by his growing frenzy, it’s the only coherent thought that claws through the haze in his mind. “Keep talking, please,” you plead, fingers still lost in the heat of your body. “Tell me what you’ll do to me when you see me.”

Logan picks up the rhythm again, his movements faltering as his chest heaves, ragged breaths spilling out while his hand works faster. “Gonna fuck you slow and deep, just how you like it. Face to face, so you can kiss me as much as you want, ‘cause I know my girl loves that, am I right?”

My girl. He’ll regret that one the second the high fades and clarity sets in.

Word after word falls from his lips without thought, uncontrollable, as though he’s surrendered to the storm of desire raging in his being—a storm in which your name is the eye of it all.

You are everywhere, and you take up all the empty spaces he thought were impossible to fill, sinking into the depths of his unconsciousness.

Not a single part of him is left untouched by you, by the power of your presence in his life, consuming him in ways he never imagined.

Your airy mewls ripple through the line, feeding his ravenousness, adding to the tightening knot of pleasure coiling low in his abdomen. His muscles strain, thighs tensing. Each stroke of his hand prolongs this sweet torture. 

“Come for me, princess. You’d make me so h-happy if you came right now.”

And you do, because it’s not just his touch anymore—it’s his voice, and the way he commands you without force. How you’ve become accustomed to him, nodding along to each instruction he mutters.

Beneath your fingers, your swollen clit pulses, and though he can’t see it, he imagines it perfectly, having spent enough time worshiping it.

He knows, even from a distance, what your body must be doing. Your back arching off the bed, thighs quivering and clenching tight around your own hand. Those perfect legs of yours trembling as you reach your so-desired climax.

Loud and unrestrained, you moan, and for a moment, he wants to be with you so badly that he ponders if the theory of traveling across time and space sounds that far-fetched after all.

Logan doesn't need much after that for the thread to snap at long last, his groans dying on his lips as he stares in awe at the spurts of his seed landing wherever his eyes fall: a bit on the top of his pants, on his hand, his briefs. His cock twitches in his grip as he continues stroking himself through the aftershocks, gulping when it becomes too much to handle.

So phone sex is off the list now. Great.

“Miss you, too,” he mumbles once he’s caught his breath, tossing his glasses onto the passenger seat. His forehead feels damp to the touch, and he contemplates when was the last time he came this hard.

The elephant in the room hasn’t been addressed yet. He knows you expect him to say more, something deeper and rawer, but that’s all he can force himself to spit out.

Sometimes, he forgets that you can’t read him all the time. Although you know him better than anyone else, there are certain thoughts and memories locked tightly inside him, things you'd never discover on your own. Secrets he admits he should share with you, but he’s at a loss for how. Words aren’t doable when he needs them the most.

Maybe it's a matter of age—you’re a natural at voicing your feelings.

At some point, you ask: “When did you say you were returning?”

One thing’s clear: he can’t afford to lose you. He’d be an idiot if he let that happen.

“In five days, I think.” Were he with you, he'd hold you in his arms, kissing your lips. God, how he misses kissing you. All of you. “I’ll keep you updated.”

“It’s okay,” you respond, and in his mind, a blank canvas fills with the familiar image of you lying on your side, curling into a ball the way you always do. “I should go to sleep. Talk to you tomorrow.”

“Sure.” Thank you for everything. “Get some rest.” Are you still in love with me? “Bye.” I’m coming back. You know how I feel about you, do you?

So much left unsaid, words he lacks the strength to speak. That, along with his come-stained clothes. And, of course, the limousine now perfumed like a flower shop.

Exhaustion clings to him again.

His luck has never been this good.

The next afternoon, one of the couple’s kids falls ill. Must be something he ate, the woman tells Logan, her voice light, though he can hear the shuffle of urgency behind her words.

Her husband packs their bags in the background, the muted thuds of luggage hitting the floor. You know how children are. Their hands are always filthy!

What she doesn’t realize is that Logan, in fact, doesn’t know how children are, because how could he?

He’s holed up in the hotel across the street, his only responsibility being to wait on their call, ready to drive whenever they needed him. Needless to say, his accommodations are nothing like theirs. Not that he minds it—he’s not one for luxury, has never needed it.

Truth be told, he’s no stranger to beds that groan if you shift slightly, clogged toilets that spit back water like they’re alive.

Joy rushes through him when he hears the news. He’s coming back earlier than expected, a thrill building in his chest. Twelve days he’s been away, his greed growing with each second in that desolate hotel room.

Now, the beating of his heart quickens, a faint thrumming as he stares out the window. He debates whether to let you know about his early return or keep it as a surprise. Would it be better if he just showed up?

How would you feel, knowing that, by the time the lights are out, he’ll be yours again?

He knows he should feel sorry for the poor kid, but all he can muster is a look of concern that barely reaches his eyes. Each time they pull into a gas station, he listens to the hurried slap of footsteps as the boy rushes for the bathroom to empty his insides.

He watches in the rearview as the kid’s father shakes his head, clicking his tongue with disapproval. “Do you have kids?” he asks, his voice forced into a casual tone, like he’s trying to break the silence that’s settled between them. 

Logan’s only response is to turn up the radio, some pop song he’s never heard spilling from the speakers. The lyrics are a blur of nonsense to him, but it’s enough to drown out the man’s words and the boy’s misery.

Some things never change.

As the sun dips below the horizon, he’s finally free, no longer at anyone’s beck and call. He contemplates the possibility of getting a speeding ticket, weighing his options. It hardly matters. The pull to see you, to feel you, is stronger than anything else.

Even though he tries to think of another time in his life when he felt such a raw need, no memory comes close.

When he does pull up to his place, he does it quietly. Parking the limo, he doesn’t honk, doesn’t announce himself. Fumbling with the keys ever so lightly so as not to wake you up, fitting them into the lock.

His wrist twists, and the door gives way with a soft creak.

Anxiety ripples through him as he steps inside. The smell of freshly cooked food hits him, but it only tightens the knot in his stomach, reminding him of how long it’s been since he last ate.

Later, he tells himself. After. Once he’s sated his true hunger—the kind of hunger that can only be satisfied by sinking his fingers into something real, fleshy, malleable. 

Hunger—yes, it’s animalistic, feral even. Will he be able to control himself once he’s near you? In moments like this, he feels more animal than human. Creeping, on the verge of crawling, back to you.

His feet take him to his bedroom, knowing the path to it very well. Fingers hovering over the knob, he takes a deep breath.

It’s already late, past midnight, yet energy courses through his veins as though he’s just woken from a long, ethereal dream.

He finds you asleep, your body wrapped snugly in the sheets, clutching a pillow close to your chest. Your cheek is pressed into it, breathing soft and steady, lulling him in. Kneeling on the edge of the bed, he kicks off his shoes, then slips in beside you, mirroring your position. 

A lamp sits on his nightstand, one that isn’t his, and he figures you must have brought it from your apartment. There has to be a symbolism for that.

It’s incredible how his entire world can fit into such a narrow bed.

The smart thing would be to let you sleep, to simply watch you for a moment longer. But he can’t help himself.

His thumb lingers near your face before gently cupping your cheek, and the very first contact with your skin sends a shudder through him, the warmth of your skin grounding him. He trails his fingers down to your chin, holding it with just enough pressure to remind himself that he’s here.

Leaning in, he presses his lips softly against your forehead, your typical perfume wrapping around him like a welcome.

Welcome home, Logan.

For the first time, he feels that someone’s been counting down the minutes until his return. He’d always believed a person like him didn’t deserve this. That he just wasn’t built for it.

Countless years had he spent convincing himself he’d never be the kind of man who could inspire love. His life had already been written long ago—predetermined by some cruel hand in the sky.

Destiny, fate, call it what you want—once the cards are laid out, there’s no escaping them. Or so he used to think.

You had taken that pen into your own hands, rewriting his future. You, of all people, had changed his life. No matter what the future held for the two of you, he’d always be grateful. Grateful that you’d seen the dim spark in him that others had chosen to ignore.

Thoughtlessly, his fingers continue their gentle strokes along your cheek, your hair. You stir beside him, shifting in your sleep. Your eyes flutter open, close again, and then open once more, blinking in confusion.

“Logan?” you croak, voice still groggy and thick with sleep, coming to your senses. Before he can respond, you throw yourself on top of him, smothering his face with kisses. “Why—how—”

“Sweetheart,” he says, attempting to hide his grin, but failing when your kisses shift to his neck, your nose nuzzling against his skin. A laugh slips out, warmth flooding his chest.

“You didn’t tell me you were coming home early!”

Home. Had he heard right? Had you used that word knowingly?

Peering into your eyes, he catches his reflection in your pupils, tiredness etched into his features. “Wanted it to be a surprise.”

“You could’ve told me,” you reply, fingers threading through his greying locks, massaging his scalp. You place a tender kiss on the tip of his nose. “I would’ve waited up for you at least.”

“Well, I’m here now,” he whispers back, gaze drifting to your lips, and you close the space between you, his sigh mingling with yours as one hand cradles the small of your back, fisting the fabric of his shirt. His other hand tilts your head, inviting your tongues to greet each other in an unhurried dance.

You move languidly on top of him, and he notices, breaking the kiss and pulling back. “You’re gonna fall asleep on me, are you?”

The way your lashes flutter in response should be illegal. “I could use a human-size pillow.”

“I should shower first.”

“No.”

“Baby, I smell like gas.”

“So?”

A smirk tugs at his lips at your insistence, and he gently lays you back against the mattress. Drawn to your charm once again, he licks into your mouth, mentally scolding himself when he gets carried away, letting the kiss linger longer than intended.

“I’ll be quick,” he promises, pulling the sheets over your body. Resigned, you simply nod, settling on your side.

Ten minutes later, you’re dozing off, teetering on the edge of unconsciousness when he slips into bed, wrapping himself around you from behind. One arm drapes over your waist, the other cushions your head, and there’s not a patch of skin between you left untouched.

Fatigue begins to delve deeper into his bones the longer he stays curled around you, but before the weight of sleep takes him, and the silence steals his chance, he huffs: “I missed you.” His beard grazes your skin in a soft, unintentional caress.

You pull his wrist to your lips, pressing a short-lived kiss to the inside of it. “Missed you, too.”

How the roles have reversed.

In the quietness of this starless night, you leave him no other choice but to believe you.

3:34 a.m. Still hostage to the lack of light outside. The world remains submerged in the gentle tides of sleep, undulating between dreams, except for him.

Logan wakes up at 3:34 a.m. because he’s rock hard, and being flushed against your back wasn’t helping him with his situation at all. If anything, it only heightened it.

He sits at the edge of the bed, his mind running in circles, debating whether he should jump to his feet and head to the bathroom for another shower—this time, a cold one. Returning to sleep, at least in this moment, is not a viable option.

His gaze drifts to the moonlight spilling through the window, casting its pale glow across the room. Is this your doing? The question lingers, unshakable, in his thoughts. It remains as just that: a question.

When you quietly rest your chin on his shoulder, he stifles a sigh, biting the inside of his cheek. Your voice breaks through the quiet.

“What’s wrong? Can’t sleep?” Wrapping your arms around him from behind, you circle his frame, in an effort to persuade him to sink back into the mattress.

“It’s nothing,” he says, pulse accelerating. Please, don’t look down. “I’ll be back in a second.”

“But what is—”

He doesn’t get to hear the rest of your sentence. You do look down, finding the outline of his hardened cock straining against his briefs, stealing your full attention.

“Wow.”

“Go back to sleep.”

“And leave you like this?” One hand creeps toward his waistband, your breath warm against his ear. “Wouldn’t miss this for anything in the world.”

Your nails trace a path through the coarse hair at his navel, and Logan tenses. His legs feel like jelly as you cup his balls, fondling them gently between your fingers.

Behind him, your low chuckle stirs something primal in him, making his blood thrum hot beneath his skin. He should be the one doing this to you, not the other way around.

“Darlin’, I don’t—” He’s cut off by his own guttural groan when you fist his length, pumping him in rhythm with his uneven breaths. “I don’t need this.”

“Seems like you do,” you whisper, momentarily halting your ministrations to place your palm in front of his face, hoping he takes the hint. You kiss his stubble, pausing just short of his mouth. “I want to take care of you. Always do.”

Your palm hovers before him, inviting. Grabbing your wrist, he licks it, coating it in his spit and guiding you back down to him. Together, your hands glide along his length, and his gaze locks onto yours, the intensity of it making his neck tense.

You beam with delight under his stare. That red organ caged within his ribs—a blood-pumping machine of passion—surges back to life as he sees you.

He had won the battle. He had triumphed over his past; had lived enough lives, endured enough years, to arrive at this moment.

This had to be the purpose of his existence: to share this part of his stay on earth with you.

“You’re so hard,” you say, twisting your wrist at the tip of his cock, reveling in every buck of his hips, each movement a reflection of his exaltation. “Guess you did miss me.”

With a quiet growl, he reaches behind, nudging your thighs apart until they find your mound, cupping you through your underwear. “I’m not the only one who’s been missin’ someone.” He pulls the fabric aside, sliding his fingers through your wet folds. His nostrils flare as he feels how ready you are. “Why am I not surprised?”

Your breath hitches, and you press yourself closer against him, your tits against his back, mouth teasing at his neck. “That’s what happens when you’re gone.” Another kiss on his nape. “You could take me with you next time.”

“Can’t do that,” he answers, teasing your entrance. “No work would get done.”

His movements cease to a stop. Yours do too. Turning his head just enough to glance over his shoulder, he scrutinizes your expression, pride swelling in his chest as he takes in your affected state.

“You’re not goin’ back to sleep, are you?”

There’s the shake of your head. A single word escapes your lips, imbued with pure fervor: “Please.”

He captures your mouth in an ardent kiss, tugging at your shirt (which is, in fact, his) to undress you, his wandering hands roaming beneath it.

As his mouth meets your neck, something cold brushes against his lips, drawing his gaze down to what’s hanging from your neck.

His dog tags. The ones he had given you before leaving for that job, as his way of telling you I’m coming back without having to say it aloud. And you, as always, understood; had even promised to keep them safe, though he hadn’t expected you to actually wear them.

Now, with your shirt discarded, they lay against your bare skin, his name resting in the valley between your breasts.

“You like ‘em?” His fingers grip the chain and give it a gentle tug, drawing you closer so he can breathe over your lips, his breath mingling with yours. “Like knowing you’re mine? You get off on it?”

You nod in agreement. Of course, you do. Though emotionally constipated and not the most expressive, Logan is a lover who knows how to awaken desire—a good lover, indeed. A decent one.

Which is why he agrees to any idea that crosses your mind, like the one you just whispered in his ear.

He may be older than you, but he’s always been more on the traditional side. You, on the other hand, are continually searching for new ways to innovate.

The round globes of your ass jiggle over his face as he spreads you apart, entrenched by how your skin moves above him, your glistening hole clenching around nothing, as if your body itself is calling to him.

With his head propped against the headboard, he watches you take him deeper, your saliva dripping down the wiry hairs of his cock. The slick heat of your tongue traces over his slit, back and forth, driving him to the edge.

When he hears you gag, it stirs something inside him—a deep need to return the favor, to match your devotion.

At the end of the day, he’s a man on a mission, and right now, that mission is you.

Right there, with his nose and mouth buried in you, he wonders why he hadn't thought of this sooner. If he could choose a natural end like any other man, he'd wish for it to be by suffocation—your body his last breath.

Logan inhales deeply, like a man starved, working two of his fingers inside your throbbing center, his tongue flicking relentlessly over your clit, punching moan after moan out of you. Each thrust of his fingers, each stroke of his tongue, sends waves of pleasure coursing through you.

His beard, streaked with gray, leaves a trail of fire wherever your hips meet his face, pushing back against him. Every so often, you pull off his cock just to ramble, panting, about how good he's making you feel.

From where he lies, you’re a sight to behold, nothing short of divine. “Just what I needed, doll. You taste so fuckin’ sweet,” he blurts out, your frantic cries pouring into his ears as he sucks the swollen bud between his lips. “Can’t believe you let me do this to you. You love makin’ your old man happy, don’t you?”

He used to think he'd burn in hell for indulging in the desire to know you like this—raw, ungraceful.

His judgment must be fucked up, because now, all he sees in you is heaven incarnate. You must be the closest thing to it he’ll ever find.

“Shit, I…” you trail off, gasping as he replaces his fingers with his tongue, drinking from your arousal and tasting every bit of you. “I thought about you every day.”

“Bet you did, just like that night I called you. You know how I felt when you told me you were wearing my clothes?” His hand comes down with a firm slap on your right asscheek, drawing a whine from you as your movements falter. “Can smell you all over these sheets. Makes me wonder how many times you made yourself come while I was away.”

You slip the tip of his cock back in your mouth, your hands and lips working in sync. His nose brushes against the plush skin of your thighs before his teeth graze your flesh, biting down just enough to leave a sting. His fingers curl inside you, hitting that perfect spot again and again, and you moan around him, your throat vibrating against his length.

He makes you come like this, knuckles deep inside you while his thumb circles your clit. Overwhelmed by pleasure, you let go of his dick, and it hits Logan’s stomach with a wet pop. His strong arms tug you closer to his face, eyes falling closed as you ride the wave of your orgasm against his mouth, palms pressed flat on his chest.

For a brief moment, he can’t breathe, can’t feel anything but you, your scent, your taste filling his senses.

Later, he rolls you onto your back and climbs on top of you, uncertain of how much time he has spent lapping at your wetness. His hard length glides along your folds, and he lines himself up without pushing in, looking right into your eyes. 

“Remember what I told you that night over the phone?” he asks, his breath coming in quick bursts, and you nod, head lolling back as he pinches your lower lip between his fingers. “Repeat it.”

“Logan—”

“You say it, and I’ll make it happen.”

Perplexity clouds your features. “You said you’d fuck me slow and deep, just h-how I like it. Face to face, because—”. The words escape you, a sob tearing through your throat as he eases the first few inches of himself inside you, your walls instinctively making space to wrap around him.

He’s home.

“Go on. What else did I say?” he teases, relishing in it. He’s guilty as sin. “Or were you too lost in thought touchin’ yourself?”

“F-face to face,” you slur, nails digging into his scarred back, and he keeps plunging his length into your interior to the hilt. Your lips part slightly, craving the kiss that only he can give you. “You said you’d do it face to face so I could kiss you whenever I wanted.”

He hums, low in his throat, as he gives the first thrust of the night, taking great pleasure in your expression: open-mouthed, eyes scrunched, and a slight crease forming between your brows.

Smoothing his thumb over your forehead, he tsks, pausing his movements. “None of that, princess. Look at me, c’mon.”

You obey, forcing your eyes open, and in that instant, he swears he can feel every tremor coursing through you. “Logan,” you coo, your voice aching as you stretch your neck toward his mouth.

The way you say his name—seductively, charged with a fascination that riles him up—manages to ignite a fire only you can kindle. It’s all the invitation he needs.

“I know. Too much, huh?” His tone drips with condescension, teasing in a way that feels almost cruel. He can’t help it, though: it’s in very his nature. “Need to hear you say it. Need you to tell me how much you want this.”

Like everything else in your world, your patience begins to wither, hips instinctively bucking beneath him, seeking even the slightest bit of friction. But he still withholds the kiss you long for, dangling it just out of reach.

“Please,” you beg, voice breaking as you plead. “Fuck me, baby. Missed you so much while you were away. Please, please, please—”

Logan enjoys hearing you beg. He won’t pretend otherwise. There's a satisfaction in knowing he holds this power over you, that he's the only one who can unravel you this way, your body splayed open beneath him.

The thought of others who may have once been in his place, making you fall apart just like this, sets his blood on edge.

Jealousy, sharp and corrosive, crawls up his spine, and it spurs him on, guiding the tempo of his thrusts.

He wonders if he’s ever fucked you this fiercely before, with a passion that pulses from every part of him. You’re given no space for thought, no moment to catch your breath—just his unforgiving pace and the sounds spilling from your lips.

He has a way of breaking you down, turning you into a trembling, whimpering mess beneath him, and you surrender willingly, craving each second of it.

So fuckin’ tight. Can y’hear her? How badly she needs me?

Sex had never felt like this before. He’d grown accustomed to quick, meaningless fucks in poorly lit bars, fleeting encounters that left him questioning if this was all there was. If this wasn’t the best he’d ever know. 

For a while, he’d tried to solve that emptiness, searching in nameless lovers and hollow hearts for the very thing he feared most: love.

And yet, he wanted it, yearned it, guarding his desire like a secret he barely admitted to himself. Until one day, you stumbled into his life, and all the strength he thought he had wasn’t enough to push you away.

He presses deep into the back of your thighs, bringing your chests so close they're nearly brushing. Claiming your mouth in a maddening kiss, all teeth and tongue, leaving no space for softness. As he nibbles at your bottom lip, he feels you tighten around him, your cunt pulling him under, clouding his thoughts.

“Close?” he murmurs, hips snapping against you with an utterly obscene rhythm that drowns out the world, better than any song ever made. “Such a good girl. Gonna come, sweetheart? Let me see how gorgeous you look when you fall apart, making a mess just for me.”

The constant, steady drag of his cock doesn’t seem to get old for you. He’s leaving his mark within you, inside you, carving a space for himself. His tip keeps hitting all the right spots, prompting you to tilt your pelvis to meet him halfway, telling him there, yes, there. More, please.

His hand slides down, rubbing your clit with his fingers. Doesn’t need any extra help when doing so, your arousal providing all the slickness he needs. He feels like a runner on the final stretch, the finish line within reach, so close he can almost touch it, savoring the euphoria and bliss of crossing it.

The way you sing his name never loses its allure, despite all the times he’s heard it spill from your lips. Especially at this moment, with him buried deep inside you, every thrust a promise to make you feel good.

You shamelessly come while he keeps driving into you, vigorous and untamed—like a caged animal unleashed, tasting freedom for the very first time.

Ankles digging into his lower back, a trail of persistent kisses along his beard. You want him inside, that much he can tell.  It’s not like he ever finishes anywhere else, but the reminder doesn’t bother him. It only serves as a reassurance: that you still want this, want him. You haven’t changed your mind.

He sinks his teeth into your neck the instant he feels his orgasm tearing through him, hips stilling and sagging as a string of grunts abandons his being, dampening your skin even more.  He loves to fill you up, it consumes him entirely.

Such an intimate, visceral act, and then he gets to see his seed trickling down your thighs. He realizes that he doesn’t need much to be happy.

You keep kissing him, his neck, his face. It may seem absurd to say that every kiss feels like the first, yet it’s true.

Even after he’s traced all the contours of your mouth and committed every detail of your body to memory, he can’t help but feel that same thrill of excitement he experienced months ago when he dared to push beyond the boundaries he had set for himself.

Staring at each other, naked, all the love in the world seems to fill these four walls. The compassion and tenderness in your gaze remain unchanged. You’re a dream come true.

It can’t end like this. He can’t allow you to drift back into sleep without saying what needs to be said. Something has to happen, something only he can conjure.

“I think…” He hesitates. Starting with I think carries an air of uncertainty. “I don’t—”

“Logan,” you interrupt, your hand finding his. “I know.”

Yes, you do. You always seem to know everything, but that can’t be enough. He can’t lean on your unspoken understanding of his feelings.

“You still deserve to hear it.”

“It’s not necessary.”

“It is.”

More silence. The moon is the solitary spectator of his upcoming declaration. 

“You were right,” he begins, drawing your intertwined hands closer to his face, pressing a soft kiss on the back of yours. His voice drops to a murmur. It’s not just his body that feels completely exposed anymore; something deeper within him stands bare. “I’m in love with you.”

You scrutinize him as if he’s revealing the secret to eternal life. Again, you kiss his cheek, cupping it gently with your palm.

“It won’t get any better than this. There are no more layers to peel away, okay?” He offers explanations you never even asked for in the first place. “This is what I am.” Much to his dismay, you overlook his choice of words: what instead of who.

He glances away, his gaze landing on the dog tags resting against your skin. The same old guilt threatens to engulf him, as it does each time without fail, and that seems to be your cue to lower yourself to his eye level, eyebrows raised.

“I’m not with you because I’m waiting for you to change. I like you just as you are, Logan. And I want all of you, both the good and bad stuff.” A gentle smile breaks across your face as you stretch your arm to retrieve his glasses from the nightstand. Placing them on your nose, your eyes twinkle with contentment. “Do they look good on me?”

“You don’t need them yet.”

“That doesn’t mean I can’t pull them off.”

“Come here,” he mutters, sighing when you nuzzle his chest, cradling your head between his hands. He ponders what to say, what to do next, but no clear idea sounds promising.

And so it gives you the chance to speak up: “You’re not getting rid of me that easily.”

I hope I don’t, he thinks to himself as he brushes your hair away from your face, fingers caressing your temples. I hope I never do.

dividers by: @/cafekitsune thank you!!! <3

[hobis-hope95]

Blessed by the Gods

fancast!Benjicot Blackwood x Bracken!fem!reader

Summary: You, the only daughter of Amos Bracken, had just been offered away in marriage to a man much older than you, and in the hopes of having some peace and quiet for you to express your anguish towards the Gods that allowed this, you go to a place you found a couple months ago - a beautiful clearing with flowers scattered around and a weirwood tree in the middle. You knew it was risky, as you'd seen him there before, but in a moment of distraction Benjicot Blackwood found you and now you must suffer the consequences.

Warnings: 18+, enemies to lovers, a little fluf (veeery little), kinda dom x sub, swearing, hunting (it's basicaly it but I don't know if there's another term for it, when you read you'll know), smut, porn with (very) little plot, fingering, p in v, unprotected sex, rough sex, breeding kink, praising kink.

Authors note: Heyy, so this is my very first time posting something I wrote (I do write a lot but mostly I get stuck and end up not finishing it) because I'm OBCESSED with Kieran Burton since I saw him in the goddamn teaser, plus I've been reading plenty of fanfics of him and two of them particularly inspired me for this (I'm sorry, I don't remember the names or the authors to tag them). Last but not least, English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry for any mistakes.

You should hate him. You should’ve never been in that place, for you knew it was Blackwood territory, and should’ve heard him getting closer before. But you didn’t. You knew he went there frequently and if he saw you in the golden dress you wore in that particular place, he would definitely tell you to go back to your lands, but not without some provocation first. But that weirwood tree was so beautiful even if hidden in the middle of the woods, the flowers that bloom around it were so unique that you had to go there and admire them in a way to flee from the confinements of Stone Hedge. Or you told yourself that this was the reason you went there.

You found it the first time by accident. You had got lost in the woods, no track of a clearing nearby for you to situate yourself, when you saw the red leaves and decided to get near, for you knew that the weirwood roots extended long through the floor – making itself exclusive for a few yards in its radium – and you would be able to see the sky without the treetops being on your way. When you got there, though, the place was so gorgeous you could not leave right away.

After that, you tried to memorize as much of the path you could and return to that same place for moments of peace. That was until one day you heard footsteps – of one person it seemed – and you hushed to hide away. Moments later, hidden behind some bushes, you saw when no other than Benjicot Blackwood appeared through another end of the clearing where, you didn’t notice before, had a small trail that probably led straight to Raventree Hall.

Bloody Ben. Lord Blackwood. Lord of the house you were supposed to hate, and yet you found him so extremely gorgeous. You’d saw him only a few times. On Riverrun where your families sometimes were called by their Paramount Lord or near the stream that divided their lands, often arguing with your cousin in the company of a few others of his House and a few times you ended up being the victim, getting back home after slapping him across his face with his obscene remarks or just leaving after outsmarting the man – for the second you took much pride in.

On some of the times you’d been on the clearing you ended up having to hide when hearing his footsteps and waiting for him to leave before you could move. He’d mostly sit in one of the roots of the old tree and do whatever he felt like doing at the moment. You’d seen him reading, cleaning his sword, crafting some arrows and doing nothing at all, but he always stayed for about two hours before finally leaving.

Today however, probably because you were stressed with the news of your arranged marriage, you didn’t hear him getting close. When he saw your dress, the colour of your house shining through the rays of sunshine, a smirk crept in his face with the ideas he had in mind.

He knew it was wrong, hideous, the idea of wanting anything that came with the red stallion in a golden shield, your House’s coat of arms. He knew that from any woman he could want, you should not be a possibility. But with your hair that finished around your hips and a face that looked like a gift from the Gods, allied with your wits and challenging manner, he could not lie to himself that more than once he woke up in the middle of the night hot and bothered after a much-detailed dream about you – and eventually would handle his hardness with the thought of defiling you and making you his.

What he didn’t know, and you tried to deny it as much as you could, was that you also had conflicting thoughts about him. Since the first time you’d saw him in Riverrun, his face showing a mischievous glow with a smirk on his lips as your family entered the room, you fought with your own body as your heart raced and your cheeks burned in his presence. You hated the way he mocked your cousin and told you the lousiest of things, his lascivious expression making you hot and bothered as well, and you hated that every time you saw him, you knew that at the end of the day you would toss and turn for hours trying to erase his face from your mind.

You told yourself it was just because he was the only one who didn't walk on eggshells when talking to you – or anyone for that matter – and because you liked the challenge, but deep down you knew that your feelings for him were far from hatred, and the idea of trying to find out the true meaning of them scared you.

“Gods, have I done anything to anger you so that I’m faded to marry Forrester Frey? I would do anything, please!” You asked to the faced weirwood tree, knowing you’d have no answer but desperate enough to look like a crazy woman who talks to a tree by yourself. What you did not know was that someone did hear you.

Benjicot took his blade from his waist, taking extra care to not be heard, and when he got close enough to you, he acted quickly, one arm holding your body – your arms entrapped – and the one with the blade stopping on your neck.

“My, my, look what we have in here, a lost Bracken broodmare, far away from home” Her breath got caught up on her throat with the feeling of the cold blade on her skin and her heart jumped on her chest with his body pressed against her back and his voice so close to her ear “Good thing that I found you before any other predator did, huh?”

“Let me go, please!!” You pleaded, pure panic spilling from your voice, and Benji almost moaned – he had no idea that having you pressed against his body in panic would arouse him that much “Oh no, my darling, I could not do such a thing. You just committed a crime, you see, for you are far away from your father’s lands and what fair lord would I be if I do not punish criminals like you?”

“Please, I’ll vanish from your sight in less than a minute and no one will know about this, okay? Just please, let me go!!” Your eyes were burning with unshed tears with the thought of the possible punishment he had in mind, and you didn’t stay still, moving your body in an attempt to free yourself from him even if useless, as he was taller and way stronger.

“No, no, no, my darling, I could not possibly do that, your Bracken lord can play blind on your actions, but I am a serious ruler and punish all criminals as their crimes demand” He tightened his grip on your body, his fingers pressing harder against the clothed skin of your waist, and as he continually pressed on you, a warm feeling cursed through you until it reached in between your thighs “But what punishment would be enough? Thieves, who take things that don't belong to them, have their hands cut off. Murderers, who take lives that do not belong to them, pay with their own lives. Now you, who committed invasion of lands that don’t belong to you, what could I possibly do to punish you correctly?”

Once again you pleaded, ‘please’ sounding like a repeated prayer on your lips as he inhaled the sweet smell of your hair “I could not invade your father’s lands, or I would be committing a crime of my own” He stated as if he did not listen to your pleads and when he spoke again, his voice was huskier and low like a whisper “But I could invade your territory myself”

You hated yourself for how your body reacted to his words, your thighs squeezing together when you felt the heat on your lower belly grow, and hated even more that a side of you wanted him to go ahead with his threat full of mischievous intentions. Him, on the other hand, was more than pleased to hold you that way, his front fully in contact against your behind and his groin pressed against your back.

“Please, Benjicot, lord Blackwood, please” You repeated and started struggling even more when you felt his hard cock pressed against your back, trying to move away “Please, please! What, my lady, do you want me to do?” He mocked, repeating what you said in a higher pitch, as his hand with the knife left your throat and went to your hip “You want me to be gentle?”

Another wave of heat made you close your eyes for a second, a hard sigh leaving your lips and you didn’t answer. He laughed when he heard you “This is supposed to be a punishment, but I’ll make an exception if you behave” He said, his breath hot against your ear as the hand on your hip went further down and grabbed the skirt of your dress, pulling it up.

Your neck now free from the threat of his blade, an idea came to your mind. You were not sure if it would work, but it was your only hope, so you took it. Bending your head forward to gain some impulse, you took a deep breath – bracing yourself for the upcoming pain – and shook your head back with all your strength, hitting his head on the side.

Benjicot, surprised with what had just happened and with his head pulsating, faltered his grip on you long enough for you to get rid of his arm around you and start running, your head spinning and your vision still blurry from the blow. You felt and heard when the skirt of your dress ripped, before the other man’s hand lost its grip on the fabric, but you didn’t turn around to check the damage.

With your vision still recovering and the pulsing pain in your head, you headed to the woods, still not sure if you followed the right path, only caring about getting as far of him as possible. Benjicot, on the other hand, quickly recovered from the dizziness, the pain easily subsiding, and he growled before following you, euphoric and feeling his blood rush through his body straight to his cock with the expectation of hunting you down.

You ran as fast as you could, your breathing burning in your lungs and your legs aching, and tried to dodge the trees and bushes in your way. Even with all your efforts, you heard his steps and breathing not that far away, and fear crept inside you, being the one thing that prevented you from collapsing in that moment.

He knew those woods like his own chambers – losing track of how many times he went there to hunt, explore, have a moment of peace or take out his anger on the trees – and he had the advantage of being taller than you, his muscles trained for endurance in the battlefields, so even if you ran with all your strength, it would still be easy enough for him to reach you.

“Bracken!! Do not think you can run away from your punishment, you’re still on my lands” Your step became unsteady when his voice seemed closer than you imagined and after tripping over a tree root, you couldn't keep your balance, ending up falling with your body and arms protecting you from ending face first into the grass.

As you were turning to place your hands on the ground and help you stand, you heard a twig cracking right behind you and soon enough his voice made you turn your head “Poor mare, doesn’t know her way home, but don’t worry, I’ll show you when I finish your punishment if you want”

You tried to turn yourself so you could stand back up, but before you could do anything, he caught your ankle and pulled you closer, turning you to face him “No, no my darling, you’re not escaping me again, now come here, the quicker it starts, the quicker it finishes, if you want... or you could just enjoy it”

“No, no, no!!” You repeated like a prayer and when he positioned himself between your legs, you started to punch and scratch at his chest, face and arms “Calm down, I think I was mistaken, for you are not a mare but a kitten, but no need to show your claws. I know I said that I would be gentle if you behaved and you didn’t, but I do have a soft spot for beautiful girls like you”

Quickly enough, as if your efforts meant nothing, Benjicot grabbed both your wrists and held them above your head, leaning his body closer to yours – his groin pressing against the middle of your thighs and his mouth just a few inches away, his breath hitting your face.

“You know what surprised me about your behaviour just now?” He asked, looking at your eyes, before he kissed your jaw and a hand went to your ankle “Because every time I see you, be in the Tully’s assize or the boundary, you are always looking at me so needy that makes me want to fuck you right there”

He left open-mouthed kisses through your neck as you felt the hairs on your nape stand and his hand began to move up your leg through the fabric of your dress “So why now are you pretending you do not want this?” He moved his hips forward, his hardness pressing against your clothed folds, and you didn’t have the strength to hold a moan.

“Be-because I don’t! You Blackwoods are just so ugly that I’m surprised to see something like that in the middle of a crowd” You spat, trying to regain some of your pride, but he chuckled, lifting his head with a smirk.

“Act all you can, kitten, but that moan just annulled everything you said, you know” His hand now was in your inner thigh and as he stopped talking, his calloused fingers went straight to your folds. You bit the inside of your cheeks to hold your voice and furrowed your brows, but he still looked almost amused at your efforts.

“Fuck you” You twisted in his grip but could not move enough to escape his touch and he took the chance to move his index finger through your folds, watching as you closed your eyes and your hips grounded into his touch “Oh, my lady, deny it as much as you want, but your body will remain true to its desires”

His smirk grew wider, his tongue sliding through his teeth, as his thumb found your clit and he watched in pleasure as you clenched your jaw and your legs opened wider for him. He circled your bundle of nerves with his thumb while his middle finger slid down your folds, reaching your entrance, and didn’t waste the opportunity to shove his finger inside you to the point where only his last knuckle was visible outside.

You moaned loudly, having been caught off guard, and your walls tightened around his finger “Fuck, you’re so tight, it’ll feel delicious around my cock” Benjicot started moving his finger, almost completely withdrawing before plunging it back inside, while still rubbing his thumb through your clit, and soon enough you were a mess, your thoughts fogged with the pleasure his hand was giving you.

You didn’t even notice when his hand let go of your wrists, too caught up on the feeling of his finger inside you and his pace growing faster by the second, as you fought against the undeniable pleasure you were feeling, and when he curled up his digit inside you, the thin string of pride you hung yourself by collapsed, giving in to the urge of your feelings and enjoy as he claimed you.

“M-more, please” You whispered, completely giving in to the ache of your heart. That was why you could not stray your eyes from him at every assize, that was why you would walk too close to the boundary and why you would come all the way from Stone Hedge to that specific clearing with that specific weirwood tree.

Your heart wanted him and there was no denying it, not anymore, not when his middle finger curled inside you so deliciously that made you see stars through your eyelids and not when you caught a glimpse of him and he looked at you like a starved man “Say again, kitten? I didn’t hear you” He teased, thinking you had yet again tried to deny your wishes.

“More, please, Benjicot” You said before you moaned again, your eyes fully opening now with your brows furrowed in pleasure, and for a second he wished he had a portrait painted of you like this. He pushed another finger inside, his pace now relentless with his cock throbbing through his breeches, and with his free hand he grasped the front of your dress, tearing the fabric to expose your full breasts.

“Stopped putting up a fight now, kitten? But this is not a treat, this is a punishment” He said as he curled both his fingers inside you once again before completely withdrawing from your wet cunt. He lifted the fingers that were on you seconds ago and looked at them, making a disapproving sound with his tongue “Just look at that, look at the mess you made on my fingers, huh?”

He tapped at your lower lip with his wet fingers, the smell of yourself arousing you even more “Now be a good girl and open up” And you did as he said. You closed your lips around his fingers as you felt them press at your tongue and moaned as you tasted yourself “Clean them”

You ignored the smug smirk on his lips, knowing he was enjoying bossing you around more than anything, and hollowed your cheeks sucking on his calloused digits. Now it was his turn to let out a pleased groan and when you looked at his eyes his pupils were blown, his irises darker, what almost made you moan on his fingers again.

“I’ve heard you back there by the weirwood tree, your cunt of a father wants to sell you to that old Frey?” Benjicot retreated his fingers from your mouth and ran them down your chin, your saliva running through your skin as he slowly traced a way through your neck and collarbones until he reached one of your breasts, both his digits circling your already pointy nipple as he watched your velvety skin under his touch, his smirk had gone away from his face “That old dog deserves not even a piece of you”

You felt your heart skip a beat with his words, trying not to conclude anything for he had not confirmed yet “But soon enough he won’t be a problem, don’t worry kitten” He twisted your nipple between his index and thumb, trying to calm down his anger with the thought of Forrester Frey being anywhere near you, before you asked “How?”

“Because after I finish with your punishment, no man will take you as their wife” He pinched your nipple and you moaned again, the threat mixed with his ministrations and the dark expression in his face being almost too much.

The Blackwood lord moved his other hand to the laces of his breeches, undoing them while still stimulating your breast, and your breath hitched on your throat as you looked down, fixed on his slender fingers dealing with the strings, seeing as it became loose around his hips before he had to let go of your breast to get rid of the fabric that covered his lower part.

As he took off his breeches he came back to his position between your legs, your thighs on top of his, and his smirk placed itself back on his face as he watched your eyes widen with the sight of his bare hard cock.

“You’re- this is-, you are so big” You let out, shock and want on your face as he pushed your dress up, revealing your glistening cunt to him “I know, kitten, but do not worry, it will fit” You lifted your gaze from his hips to his eyes, finding him already staring back at you, and all you could think was that you wanted him more than anything in the world.

He placed both hands on your hips, bringing you closer, and grabbed him in his hand to slide through your folds, collecting as much of your juices as he could. He wanted you, desperately, he wanted to completely fill you with his length and fuck you mercilessly until all he heard was your screams of pleasure, he wanted to ruin you to any other man and to have only you for the rest of his fucking life.

And so, with the promise of punishing you in his head, he shoved his cock all the way inside you in one thrust, leaving you gasping, your mouth opened and your eyes closed, the stretch and pain of your first time almost bringing you to tears. He had never experienced something like this before – as his previous experiences had been with whores – and didn’t even dare to move, your cunt gripping him so tightly he thought that if he moved at that moment he would cum on the spot.

As he noticed your eyes closed, he pinched your nipple “Open your eyes, kitten, I want to look at your beautiful eyes” You sighed before opening them and when you did, he noticed the tears you tried not to spill. That made something snap inside him, breaking all the will he had to hurt and punish you, and he bended down to meet your face, his breath on your face and his eyes on your lips.

“As soon as I saw you there, next to the weirwood tree, all I wanted to do was to hurt you, make you regret stepping on Blackwood territory on that golden dress of yours, but it’s rather difficult to focus with that pretty face” One of his forearms was keeping him steady as his free hand came to your breasts, the feeling of your soft skin on his calloused fingers almost making him moan “Go on, tell me how you hate me, fight me, tell me how you are disgusted by me, so I can focus on punishing you”

A moan. You opened your mouth to say something, anything, but all you could do was moan and it went straight to his cock, throbbing inside your warm and tight walls, still not moving. As he glanced up, he met your teary eyes and opened mouth in an erotic portrait, he growled as he let go of the rest of his resistance and crashed his lips against yours in a desperate kiss. As your mouth was already agape when he did it, his tongue easily slipped inside and found yours, and you reached for the back of his head, your fingers curling on his black hair.

As he kissed you hungrily, he started moving, his cock almost leaving you entirely before pushing himself back inside, and the sensation of being full of him was so good that you could not control your moans. As he felt the vibrations coming from your mouth, Benjicot squeezed your breast hard and you were sure that would leave a mark – but you couldn’t care less.

As his pace grew a little faster, the pure pleasure replacing the pain of the stretch each time his hips met yours, he let go of your lips, glaring at your face with the squirms and sighs you let out. Even if his dreams were vivid, nothing would compare to having you like this – a mess of fabric, hair and red bruised lips – at the moment, the feeling of your walls always so tight around him and your soft skin on his hand made him grunt.

Your eyes went to his on that exact moment and you could swear that your walls squeezed around him at the sound. He placed his face on the crook of your neck as he started biting and placing kisses to the skin as a way to mark you, and started going down through your collarbone to the front of your chest before placing his lips to the nipple that wasn’t being stimulated.

The wet noises of skin slapping against skin and the feeling of both your nipples being teased made your eyes roll back in pleasure and now you didn’t even try to muffle your sounds anymore “Such a noisy kitten, taking me so well” He praised, lifting his head from your chest, and held your hips with both his hands, so strong that you now worried that you’d get bruises all over your body “You should be mine and not that Frey cunt”

With his firm grip on your hips, he pressed deeper into you, your back arching from the ground and trying to keep up with his movements “Please... Benji” Two of the only three words that you could pronounce at the moment – the third one being more – too caught up with pleasure to form a coherent phrase, and Benji laughed at that, full of pride for making the so beautiful and correct daughter of Amos Bracken look like a common whore “Do you want to be mine, kitten? Mine to fuck and use as I please?”

His words aroused you even more, his hoarse voice sending waves of heat straight to your cunt, and you tried to nod your head in affirmation, because that seemed like the only thing you could do at the moment “Use your words, kitten, I know you can do it” He moved one of his hands so he could brush past your clit and that made you gasp.

“Y-yes please, I want you, I want you Benji” As she nearly screamed, the man felt satisfied, his hunger for you only getting bigger with the way you moved your hips in time with his, your face making the most erotic expressions as your moans and repeated words sounded like an exclusive prayer for him.

“I’m going to fuck a baby in you, fill you with my seed so much you’ll be leaking for days, so your bloody father won’t have an excuse but to marry you to me” He grunted in between his words, moving faster and deeper as he assaulted your clit, and you started feeling a knot form inside of you, the pleasure becoming almost too much “Please, please” You didn’t even know what you were begging for, but only wanting this to never end.

“Yeah? Do you want to be my wife? To have your Bracken womb filled with Blackwood children? Your cunt to be used by a Blackwood cock? Is that what you want?” He leaned in, one of his hand still giving you pleasure, his head once again going to the crook of your neck as he grasped at your thigh, squeezing the flesh as he moved you so you could wrap your leg around his waist, and he heard you when you weakly repeated “Yesyesyes”

“So I’ll make sure you get until the last drop of my seed to, soon enough, you be swelling with my babe” He whispered into your ear as he pressed further to your clit and his pace soon enough was so fast you thought he would break you. Your moans got louder as you wrapped both your legs around his waist, the knot on your lower abdomen about to snap, and he looked at you before whispering “Go on, cum for me, kitten”

And that’s when it happened. The knot snapped within you as you flooded with pleasure, your whole body spasming as your walls grew impossibly tighter around him, milking him, and with just a few more thrusts he shoved himself as deep as he could inside you before he shot his load straight to your core, coating your womb. As he started coming down from his high, he captured your lips in a sloppy kiss and let most of his weight on top of you, which you didn’t care as his warmth and his skin on yours was all you wanted at the moment.

You let out a dissatisfied grunt as he removed his softening cock from your cunt, some of his seed spilling from you, and lied to your side, pulling you to his embrace “Did you really mean it? Marrying me?”

“Yes” You said, the warmth spreading across your face “Well, you filled me with your seed and the possibility of me getting pregnant is almost certain now. Marrying you is the right thing to do” You tried to be cautious with your words, but for the love of the Gods, he had just fucked you in the middle of the woods, caution was one thing you had abandoned long ago “Okay, I admit that since I first saw you in the assize I haven’t been able to remove you from my thoughts and I dreaded the day that the news of your possible engagement would come.”

You took a breath before finishing “We have nothing to do with each other, our families fucking hate one another, but every time I got inside Riverrun fortress, I hoped you’d be there” You said, absently moving your fingers through the skin of his chest, but did not dare to meet his gaze, for you were now as embarrassed as you could be.

“I am glad to hear that, for I have almost the exact same feelings as you. I ached for being able to get closer to you at the assize and to kiss you when I saw you standing next to the boundary. I almost went to Kermit Tully to ask him to propose a betrothal between us” He answered, his hand on the back of your head caressing through your hair. You lifted your head from his chest, his words making your heart flutter, and he leaned his head to capture your lips in a soft kiss, both your and his feelings pouring down into each other.

“But I must stop you from going straight to my father, for he would kill you before you would be able to ask to see him” One of your hands went to his cheek as you parted to breathe, only now noticing you left nail marks there, and stroke his skin.

“Oh, I do know that, for I would never take you back to Stone Hedge with your dress like this” He laughed when he saw your eyes widen at his words, remembering now of the tore skirt and bust of your dress, and quickly added “I’ll give you my cloak and we’ll go to Raventree Hall for you to change, after that we’ll go straight to Riverrun and ask Lord Tully to bless our union, for your father would never go against an order of his Lord Paramount”

“That sounds like a solid plan, not that bad for a Blackwood” You teased and he smirked “And you were not that bad for a Bracken” You gasped in false shock at his words, lightly slapping his shoulder, and he laughed “It will surely be good to have you as my wife, a good way to keep things interesting”

“I hope so, you Blackwoods are not usually that fun though” You bit your lower lip as you’d seen him arch his brows “Well, it depends on what fun you’re talking about, because at least in one kind of ‘fun’ I exceed expectations and you just proved it right”

"Shut up!" You exclaimed and he turned you again before kissing you.

“Don’t need to ask twice, my lady” He said and you kissed him again.

It could have not been the way you expected it to go, but one thing you could say: the Gods did grant you a way to free yourself from a marriage with someone twice your age, still uniting two people together, in hopes of a prosperous – and maybe more peaceful – future ahead.

So that's it! As I wrote it mainly for the smut part (oh god, what a good first impression) the plot part may be a little off, I'm sorry. Please, feel free to leave a note if you guys liked it and maybe soon I post another, a series this time.

[aperrywilliams]

Little Big Secret (Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader)

(Not my gif. Credits to the creator)

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Author Masterlist

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Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader.

Summary: You’re 36 weeks pregnant with Spencer’s baby. What happens when you are about to give birth and need to contact Spencer while he is in a case out of town?

Word Count: 3.3k

Warnings: Pregnancy and labor symptoms are described. Some strong words. If I missed something, let me know. It's a fluffy one. Dad!Spencer coming to light. The chaotic trio I love having their moment (Reid-Morgan-Prentiss).

A/N: I wrote this fic based on this request. I loved doing it! Let me know what you think.

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Being 36 weeks pregnant and stuck in your apartment trying to convince your non-born baby girl to stop kicking your guts is not funny. It's worse when the same scenario occurs at 3 am, and you are alone, unable to sleep in the last 24 hours, exhausted and sentimental because your boyfriend Spencer isn't home.

You won't tell him that, though. You convinced him to go with the team to Trenton for a case, telling him you would be okay and that baby girl Reid won't be here for at least two weeks. That's what your doctor said to you in the last appointment.

Reluctantly Spencer agreed, making you swear you would call him or your sister if anything happened.

"Relax, baby. Everything will be okay. We'll be here when you return from your case," you assured him. "You have to go while you can. Once this girl is born, you'll be stuck here and will get tired of us," you giggled. Spencer's eyes widened.

"What? No! Get tired of you? Never!"

"About that. Do they know why you are taking leave in the next weeks?"

"Not really. Hotch knows, but the rest assume I'll go to see my mom," your boyfriend shrugged.

You still find it unbelievable that the best-known profilers in the country haven't noticed one of their own has a girlfriend for three years and a baby on the way.

At first, you had your apprehensions about why Spencer didn't want his team to know your existence. You thought maybe Spencer felt embarrassed because of you or didn't consider your relationship worth enough for them to know. But your boyfriend assured you it was anything but that. He told you what happened to Haley, Hotch's wife, and the multiple times a team's family member has been exposed to danger because of their job. He wanted you safe. He wanted to protect you.

The only one who knew about you was Hotch, Spencer's boss. But he, better than anyone, could understand Spencer's reasons, so he hadn't said anything.

You understood it and accepted it, even if you both knew that at some point, your secret would not be a secret anymore. For now, it was safer like this.

Exhaustion was all you got now, and even you have been trying to bribe your unborn daughter with chocolates if she behaved and let you sleep. It seemed you succeeded as she stopped making a party in your womb.

You fall asleep thinking about how your life has changed in the past years and how happy you were despite how uncomfortable pregnancy was at this point.

The next morning you woke up feeling a little better. Sleep helped, but your body was still tense, so you thought a warm bath after breakfast was a good idea to relax your sore muscles.

You were finishing your pancakes when Spencer called you.

"Hey, baby!" You greeted.

"Good morning, my love. How did you sleep?"

You didn't have the heart to tell him how uncomfortable you were last night.

"Good. Everything is good here. How is the case?" You tried to direct the topic to him. Spencer sighed.

"I think we are close to catching the unsub, but it had been hard," he confessed.

"I know you'll get him soon," you assured him. Spencer chuckled. He loved how you were always rooting for him. You were his biggest fan.

"I hope so. And you? Our baby girl has been good? When I come back-" he didn't even finish the sentence when someone called his name in the distance. 'Reid! We need you now!'

A heavy sigh left Spencer's lips.

"I'm sorry, love. I got to go," he mumbled into the receiver, guilt dripping from his voice.

"Hey, it's okay. Don't apologize and go to catch the bad guy," you encouraged him.

"I will. I love you so so much. And I love our little one. I promise to make it up to you both, okay?"

"I love you more. We'll be waiting for you."

Despite your efforts to relax during your bath, it seemed baby Reid had other plans, like moving and squeezing your insides. You tried singing to her, telling stories, and everything that came to mind.

You gave up and hopped off the tub. You dried your body and decided to watch some TV. After a while, stuck in a random show, the noise lulled you to sleep without noticing.

Everything would have been perfect if it weren't for the fact that an intense pain woke you up suddenly. You didn't know the time, but the TV was still on. You tried to sit on the sofa, but the pain wouldn't leave you, so much so that it was hard for you to breathe. The twisting in your belly was stronger than you'd ever felt and scaring you.

"My sweet girl, I know you're eager to see us, but you have some days left in Mommy's womb, so try to be nice, okay?" You panted, trying to reason with your baby.

You weren't ready to give birth, let alone without Spencer.

But, again, baby Reid had her own plans.

Another sharp pang made you slouch on the sofa; this time, you felt something warm running down your legs. You looked down and saw the liquid drip onto the couch and slide to the floor.

Fuck. Your water just broke.

-

The morning was a rush for the whole team and the Tremont police. After an anonymous tip, they located the guy who fitted the profile and ended up being the unsub they were looking for. As he had a hostage, the team moved quickly to the warehouse where he kept captive his ex-girlfriend, the source of his rage. Before things went further, Rossi's shot ended with the unsub screaming in pain and the hostage a nervous wreck but unharmed.

Spencer couldn't believe it took them a whole week to locate the bastard, but it was finally done. So they returned to the precinct to wrap the last details and go home.

Spencer was pulling the case photos off the board when his phone started ringing. He saw it was you and hastened to answer. Usually, you didn't call him while he was working.

"Hello?"

But a loud grunt came to his ear instead of your sweet voice. Spencer's eyes widened.

“(Y/N)? Is that you?"

You barely could say a word, the intense pain reducing you to heavy breathing and whimpers.

"Spence-" you managed to say. "The baby. It hurts."

It didn't take a genius to figure out what was happening."Where are you? What's wrong? Where is Tania?"

Too many questions, and you had answers for all of them. But it was difficult to say a word with the pain cursing your body. After the contraction subsided, you could speak.

"My water broke. I'm home, and Tania doesn't answer. I don't know- ahhhh, fuck!!!"

Shit. You were in labor and alone at home. Spencer wanted to throw up.

"Baby, listen to me. I will call 911, but I need you to breathe, okay?"

"No! Spencer, don't hang up. I need you," you cried.

Spencer paced frantically in the room as Emily, Morgan, and Rossi looked at him, worried.

To call 911? Who the hell was he talking to?

"Reid? What is it?" Morgan tried to get his attention, but Spencer's brain was trying to make a plan to help you without stopping talking to you.

“(Y/N), please. I need you to breathe. Can you do that for me, please?"

JJ and Hotch entered the room at that moment. Both frowned when they saw Spencer pacing and the rest standing and waiting to know what was going on and what to do to help Spencer.

“(Y/N)? Can you hear me?"

You couldn't reply to him, crying in pain instead. Spencer thought he could die of panic.

"Yes. But I can't move," you sobbed.

Hotch didn't need much to understand what was going on. Grabbing his phone, he called Penelope.

Spencer was reduced to dumb and didn't know what to do.

"Garcia, I need you to call 911 and dispatch an ambulance to..." he paused and looked at Spencer, who was talking to you. "Reid," Hotch named. When he got no response, he tried louder. "Reid! Where? Where is she?" Spencer's face found Hotch's.

"At my place," he told his boss.

"Garcia, an ambulance to Reid's address. Report a pregnant woman in labor that needs to go to the hospital. I need you to go there too. Make sure she gets to the hospital alright. I'll give you more information later."

Pregnant woman in labor at Spencer's address?

Morgan, Prentiss, JJ, and Rossi shared the same confused looks.

"Baby, the help is on the way. Penelope knows and will help you to go to the hospital. She has a key, so don't worry. I'm on my way, okay? I'll call Tania too," Spencer informed you, moving to collect his things.

"Please, hurry up," you begged. As the call ended, Spencer turned to see his boss.

"Hotch. I have to-. I need to-," Spencer stuttered. Aaron nodded.

"It'll be okay; we are leaving now," he assured Spencer.

Morgan was the first to bring the elephant in the room.

"Can you tell us what's going on?"

Then, Spencer noticed the team hearing the whole ordeal.

"Uh. My 36-week pregnant girlfriend is giving birth to my daughter right now, and she's alone. I need to be there," Spencer succinctly explained as he dialed (Y/N)'s sister's number again without luck.

To say the team was shocked was an understatement. But there wasn't time to ask questions. They needed to move quickly.

Hotch was who took the lead.

"Morgan, you'll drive to the hospital with Reid and Prentiss now. I'll stay with JJ and Rossi to pack everything and follow you. The drive to DC is about three hours; make it two. I'll take care of the traffic police," he said to Morgan, who nodded, grabbing the car keys. "Prentiss, you'll get an open line with Garcia while she joins (Y/N) and takes her to the hospital. Now go!" Hotch instructed, now patting Spencer's back. "You'll get on time. Go," he told Spencer, who nodded and stomped from the room, followed by Morgan and Prentiss.

-

"Hey, Reid. We'll make it, kid," Morgan assured while driving on the highway, Emily as the copilot. In the back seat, Spencer couldn't stop bouncing his leg, worried about if the ambulance had already taken you to the hospital. On cue, Emily's phone went off.

"Garcia, you're on speaker," Emily announced.

"My lovelies, good news. I got your girl, boy Wonder, and we're heading to the hospital. Besides the pain, she's fine," Garcia recounted, and Spencer could breathe again.

"Can I talk to her?" Spencer asked.

"No, yet; they have her in the stretcher and with oxygen while monitoring her, but as we reach the hospital and will get her admitted, we can call you again. Nonetheless, she asked me to tell you she hated you for putting a baby in her. I really like this girl already," Garcia quipped, making laugh Emily and Morgan. Spencer's cheeks flushed.

"Garcia?" He sheepishly asked. "Can you tell her I love her and am on my way?"

Morgan and Prentiss looked at each other briefly. They still couldn't believe what was happening, but either way, they had a mission to accomplish: get to the hospital before you gave birth, so the resident genius could see his baby born.

"Sure thing. I will. I'll keep you posted," Garcia assured before hanging up.

Spencer could sense that Emily and Morgan were itching to cover him with questions, but knowing his nervous state, they were respectful enough not to say anything.

"I'm sorry, guys. I didn't tell you anything about (Y/N) before," he mumbled.

"And the baby," Emily added with a non-malice tone.

Spencer's face fell with embarrassment. They were his family, after all. And he kept this little big secret from them.

"But we get it, Reid. We do," Morgan ensured.

"Yeah?"

"Yes. We all know this job, and we want the best for our loved ones, keeping them safe," Prentiss said, turning to see Spencer, who nodded. "What I still can't believe is that you kept us in the dark for three years, and none of us ever suspected a thing. They should fire us," Emily added, making Spencer chuckle.

"What I can't believe is you were able to make someone fall in love with you," Morgan quipped, smirking and gaining a slap on the arm from Prentiss. "And get her pregnant! You have been having a game all this time, and I still thought I needed to be your wingman," Morgan scoffed.

"Worst wingman on earth. He had had to do all the work for himself," Emily added. The three laughed.

They were still with an ETA of one hour when Penelope Facetimed.

"Garcia! How is she?" Spencer rushed to ask.

"Hello to you, genius," Penelope greeted. "(Y/N) is already in a room. She's 7 centimeters of dilatation, so we're waiting," she informed, turning the camera to focus you on the bed, exhausted but relieved of being in the hospital already.

"Honey!" Spencer shouted as Garcia handed the phone.

"Are you coming?" you asked in a broken tone. You didn't have much energy at this point.

"Yes! On my way now. Morgan is driving us with Emily," he informed you.

"We're almost there, pretty girl!" Morgan yelled from the driver's seat.

You let a wary smile. Spencer only wanted to be there with you so he could hold you.

"I'm sorry," you mumbled.

"No. No. Why are you sorry? You have nothing to apologize for, okay?" Spencer hastened to point.

"Our little big secret is no longer a secret," you pouted, feeling guilty about the whole ordeal.

"Baby, it doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is you and our little girl being okay. Believe me; it's the only that matters to me. I'm sorry for leaving you," Spencer sniffled.

"I love you," you said, tears streaming down your cheeks.

"And I love you so much," Spencer declared, wiping his tears.

You both kept in Facetime for a while. Spencer tried to keep you focused on anything but the pain, though it was difficult when a deep contraction raked your body from time to time.

Spencer recited your favorite poems and stories and recounted your best memories together. As a natural thing, Emily, Morgan, or Penelope made questions and comments about the things you or Spencer said. That helped. You felt accompanied, not only by your boyfriend but also by the beautiful people who were taking care of you and him. If you ever thought Spencer's coworkers didn't care about him, now all those doubts are cleared.

"We're getting there in five!" Morgan announced.

"Garcia, please tell the staff Spencer is coming so they let him rush upstairs," Emily requested.

"On it!" Garcia chirped. “The doctor is here, so I’ll hang up. Boy Wonder, the third floor, hall to the left,” she informed before the call ended.

Pushing the brakes in front of the hospital’s entrance, Morgan turned to Spencer.

"Go, pretty boy. We'll be there waiting," the man assured.

"Go to see your girls," Emily added. Spencer’s eyes were full of tears.

"Thank you. Really, thank you so much," he voiced before climbing off the SUV and rushing inside the hospital.

-

The doctor announced you were almost ready to give birth now. Just another centimeter of dilation, and you’ll need to push. After he left, you squeezed Penelope’s hand hard. You weren't sure you could do this.

“It’s okay, pumpkin. You can do it. Spencer is already here,” she comforted you. Garcia had just ended her sentence when Spencer rushed inside the room, panting and looking frantically. When he spotted you, you could see the tears in his eyes.

“Spencer!” you cried. He quickly lugged to your side. Garcia sighed, relieved that he was there. Spencer held your hand now, kissing your temple.

“I’m here, my love. I’m here. I won’t leave again,” he chanted, stroking your damped hair.

It was Penelope’s cue to leave the couple alone. But before Garcia crossed the threshold, Spencer ran to her and wrapped her in the tightest embrace he ever gave her.

“Thank you, thank you. For everything,” he mumbled. Garcia could have started crying, but it would be time for that later.

“Anytime, my love. Now go back to your woman. We’ll be outside waiting.” A grateful Spencer nodded before joining you again.

You didn't reach the last centimeter until an hour later. Spencer stood by your side, chanting praises and pushing away your sweat with a cloth whenever you needed it.

When the time came, you were pushing with all the strength you left, but your little girl wasn’t doing it easy for you.

“Spencer, I can’t,” you sobbed. Spencer kissed your head and stroked your hand.

“I know you’re exhausted, my love. But you’re almost there. We’re going to meet our little girl. Want that, right, my little pumpkin?” he talked now to your belly. The waiting room is full of aunts and uncles, ready to see you. They already love you, even if they didn't know about you until three hours ago,” Spencer pointed, and you let out a little chuckle in the middle of the pain.

The feeling of being cared for and loved gave you the last ounce of energy you needed. In the next contraction, you pushed harder, ending with a loud baby cry. Your daughter was here.

When they put her in your arms, wrapped in a white blanket, you couldn't believe it. She was the most beautiful baby in the world—the best combination between Spencer and you.

“You did so good, my love. She’s wonderful, and she’s here with us,” Spencer said, voice full of emotion and tears freely rolling down his cheeks.

You couldn’t stop looking at her.

“Our little big secret,” you cooed. “You’re a lucky baby already,” you whispered to her. Spencer chuckled.

“Should I go to tell them?” He asked you.

“They will kill you if you don’t,” you quipped.

When Spencer showed up in the waiting room, Hotch, Rossi, and JJ were there too.

All eyes were on him.

“A 7 pounds, 2 ounces, and 19.6 inches healthy baby girl,” Spencer announced, the biggest grin plastered on his face.

The room erupted in cheers and claps, everyone taking turns to hug the new father.

Once everyone calmed down, Spencer cleared his throat.

“I want to apologize for keeping this from you. I don't want you to think I don't trust or care enough to tell you about the important things in my life. It's just- you know,” Spencer trailed off. Rossi patted his shoulder.

“We know, kid. We really do,” the older man assured him.

“Yeah, Spence. We understand. That doesn't mean it’s not a big thing, but we get it,” JJ seconded.

“We are just jealous because Hotch was the only one who knew,” Garcia scoffed.

“Boss privilege, I guess,” Hotch shrugged, making the rest laugh.

“Well, being (Y/N) and baby Reid not a little big secret anymore, we can meet them properly, right?” Morgan pointed.

“Oh, yes! Please! I want to meet my goddaughter!” Garcia chirped, and Spencer looked at her, frowning.

“Don’t look at me like that, doctor. I won the privilege when I held that poor woman in pain,” she added.

“Maybe you’ll be the godmother, but I’ll be the cool aunt,” Emily chirped.

“And I’ll be Papa Rossi,” David seconded.

Spencer shook his head, laughing as everyone on the team fought for a place in his daughter's life.

He was so happy to have you and baby Reid. But now his happiness was complete knowing he could share it, and his whole found family could be part of it.

-------

Spencer Reid's Taglist: @dreatine​ @nomajdetective @jayyeahthatsme @rosalinasam2 @averyhotchner @tvandfanfic @lovelyxtom @princessmiaelicia @pastelbabygirl19 @reidsbookclub @alexxavicry @gspenc @spencerreidisbae123 @calmspencer @pauline5525mgg @disaster-in-waiting @anamiad00msday @milivanili99 @laylasbunbunny @leahblackk @miaxx03 @missabsey @taintedstranger

[writella]

Reckless Romantics

Synopsis: Can be read as a stand alone or part two to getting ready for me; a return to innocent, inexperienced!reader and her relationship with Rick Grimes; two weeks after their first time together there has been some distance, but now Rick wants to make up for how hasty he was when he touched her last.

Details: Rick Grimes x fem!reader, smut: oral (f receiving) and teaching reader how to give a handjob, unspecified (of age) age gap, sweetness + kissing + a little mutual pining maybe, probably cliche, and leaning more into Rick as the dutiful leader and gentle lover (I feel this is just as in character as dom!Rick). Reader is a music lover— any kind of music you like— but she also likes a specific band only because I watched a documentary about them at the theater in July so it made its way into the story. Slightly proofread— will be corrected more later. wc: 5-7k (I lost track after finishing it on tumblr).

A/N: I wrote this message before I returned for the summer, but I still want you to read it: Been spending time outside this summer, trying to reach some goals— time got away from me. I don’t think I’ll ever stop saying I miss you, but please know it’s always true.

— with love from writella, my beautiful reader. ♡

Rick Grimes was not a man to give in to temptation.

My mercy prevails over my wrath, he’d say— his secret keepsake phrase. The one he whispers to himself in moments of hardship; the one he uses when he needs to make decisions only a leader would. Rick was a man of discipline; honor. He never boasted about how seriously he took these qualities, but when others did— admired, applauded, stuck by him for it— it would be a lie to say that he didn’t take note and use their pride to keep him going. This is how he knows he is strong-willed, why he wouldn’t fall for foolish, forbidden things. He was better than that. The safety and prosperity he brought to Alexandria proved it, reaffirmed it.

So why couldn’t someone remind him of that two weeks ago before he touched you?

As for you, you believed yourself to be a girl who wouldn’t fall so easily for the first man who showed you any kind of affection.

From an adolescence of peers who never seemed to take notice of you to one filled with walkers and adults who were either dead or seldom your age, you learned how hard love, let alone any connection, is to come by. It has made you quite the perpetual daydreamer because of it. One with a heart and mind filled with fantasy worlds, creating what you lacked externally. It often made you see yourself as much younger than you were despite all you’ve been through. No regular person your age in the old world has probably escaped as many deaths and wannabe cowboy dictators as you have. Still, they probably knew what it was like to have a high school romance, or at least go to the movies with friends, and have graduated from well, anything. You were simply born too late and shoved into this new world too early to experience even half of it.

This upbringing has brought you up to believe yourself precocious, although— maybe you were already too old for that word now. No, you were, so maybe– sensible, realistic despite the overactive imagination; you could decipher between right and wrong, real versus fake. This is why, for as long as you could, you did not entertain any thoughts of Rick Grimes.

Other people would though, women mostly. But you did have your suspicions of others who thought the same— they just weren't as shameless. Those who were, could be found during lunch breaks from work on house porches; or laughing and whispering at community gatherings and at the back of town hall meetings. Basically any time or place they could turn into a gossip session, which was often. And it didn’t always have to do with Rick. It could be about any one of the men in town; or retelling funny moments to their friends or complaining about their co-workers. But anything of true, great interest always had to do with the community leaders. You wish you could say you were the exception to this interest, but hypocritically, you loved a good inside scoop, and luckily for you, you had a trustworthy way about you. Almost everyone who spoke to you or allowed you to sit with them and their friends for meals agreed: you were a intent, quiet listener making you the best kind of person to say things to without judgment; and people assumed you as shy, yet you loved to laugh which was great for boosting egos. They often treated you as a little sister in that way, as if the pleasure was all yours to get to hear their ramblings because they were either older or perceived themselves to be more sociable and experienced than you. You tried not to care too much about what they took you for. It was nice to feel trusted, even if people could be a little too mean or weird for your liking because no matter who it was, they made you feel as if you were watching television, and you missed television. They told you things from period mishaps– (it’s the apocalypse, there are a lot of free bleeding queens okay)— to which people in their workstations annoyed them most with very detailed explanations as to why and, of course, rumors or general talk about the leaders: who they thought each of them has slept with, if there seemed to be any fighting between them and what side they were taking, and obviously, anything that had to do with one of the guys. Some were downright obvious that one or the other was their type, while others might try to be more sly about it, always bringing whichever man it was up more than the others. But unless they were diehard Daryl girls, wanted to dominate Glenn, or had some military man, hot priest, or doctor kink for Abraham, Gabriel, or Siddiq, most of them apparently felt that Rick was the love of their lives. He was like a local celebrity. A band’s frontman.

“So, what about you?” One of your scavenging partners asked on the ride home. “Which one do you like?”

“They’re all attractive guys,” you say, keeping your eyes on the road. “But I don’t really think about them like that.” You feel a flush coming on. Crushes, or anything romantic, is a part of your internal world, not something you discuss aloud.

“Come on,” she prods. “You never join in. You just laugh at us for being delusional.”

“Whose us?” Rosita asks, her voice sharp, humorous, and not without judgment. “I don’t talk about that shit.” But secretly, she loved the drama as much as you and would have many questions for you later tonight about why you have yet to tell her of the town obsession of treating her friends like the cast of a reality show.

“I don’t laugh at you! I like it when you guys talk about that stuff.”

“But what I’m saying is that I didn’t let you ride shotgun this time so you can hold out again,” the girl jokes half-heartedly.

“What do you mean this time? I get to ride shotgun because I’m the one with the CDs.”

And it’s true, the only thing that cancelled out the silence of drive in moments where conversation ceased was your Oasis album playing in the background. Learning about the band was your new obsession. Much like listening to the crazy imaginations of the girls in town, you found the Gallagher brother rivalry riveting even if you only knew pieces of the story from the music, scraps of magazine articles, and by asking whoever in town happened to be a teen in the 90s. Thankfully you had hit the jackpot today though. One of the houses you visited was once occupied by a dad and daughter with an insane music collection in the living room and a smaller, more curated one in the girl’s room. After gathering what new music you wanted to try from downstairs, you also found some old issues of QuizFest in the girl’s room, filled with activities that were themed with shows you remember from when you were a kid, but the most important discovery— the find of all finds— was one of those Ultimate Guide, Complete Life Story magazines of none other than the band Oasis.

You would now probably know all of the drama between the brothers to tell a coherent story about the band’s history to anyone who wanted an escape from walker related events and farming talk. When you weren’t listening, that’s what people would come to you for: to borrow music, get recommendations, or to tell them a story. In all, you were getting the reputation of being the town’s music historian, meaning you usually used your knowledge to avoid talking about yourself. And it mostly worked.

Except for now.

“Well, if I had to guess,” the girl persists despite your silence, “I think it would be Rick.”

“What?” Noticing the incredulity in your tone, you calm your voice. Shrugging you say, “Why Rick? Everyone likes him.”

Rosita sends a look your way. It’s innocent enough, probably just showing that she is still listening on as she drives but you were refusing to look at anyone now to know for sure.

“Exactly,” the girl says. “He’s a classic knight in shining armor type. I feel like he’d talk you through it, which I think would be good for— someone like you.”

Your face is on fire, you can’t even speak properly. “I- first of all, what do you know about my experience?” you ask, the incredulous tone returning. But all you get as an answer is knowing snorts and chortles from the two women. Ouch. Nonetheless, you continue, “Second, you think shooting a guy in the head in front of his wife and the whole town is chivalrous?”

Oh—

That makes car goes quiet.

You know you made a mistake.

You didn’t mean it as crassly as you said it, and you did feel bad for saying it knowing that the situation was more difficult than you summed it up to be, but you didn’t apologize. All this talk about crushes and especially Rick made you embarrassed. It’s not that you didn't see what others saw anyway. Of course you noticed how nice Rick’s curls are, how he doesn’t have to use any product for them to look as they do; or those blue eyes and how when you get closer, they become that much more stark and crisp; or how good he was at talking to people, convincing them of things or simply just reassuring them as a friend; and that southern drawl that still sometimes catches you by surprise by sounding so pronounced at the end of certain words, making his voice that much more intoxicating. Of course you saw the appeal, but that didn’t mean you had a crush on him.

Right?

Maybe it doesn’t matter. You just felt you knew better. He was like a president. You know of them, and you believe in them, but you don’t get close to them. And it didn’t matter that he told Carl to personally deliver you a stereo he and Daryl found while out once. How he remembered how you liked music. How he told Carl to tell you this one was probably better than the old one you had, that it was louder. You only showed him your old stereo that once when he was helping you move. He was just a perceptive guy with a good memory. All leaders are like that.

Right?

Anyway, let’s get back to your crass… joke.

“Hilarious.” Rosita says and you hear the low contempt in her voice at your insensitivity.

“That was ages ago though,” the girl chimes in, saving you just a little, “and he did it to help her. He didn’t care about the mess he made. He save her. I’d say that’s pretty romantic.”

“Let’s not call that romantic,” Rosita scoffs, and despite the slight frustration, there was a quiet sadness in her voice at the memory. “That wasn’t love.”

“That was reckless, not romantic.” You agree. Partly because you truly do, but also in attempt to win back favor from your friend. “I shouldn’t have mentioned it.”

But after that day, it was all you could think about.

The idea of a knight; a romantic; someone that would do anything for you, ruin his reputation for you; find gifts from the outside that he’d send is son to give to you. Maybe you did find it charming, idyllic.

These thoughts soared in your mind so much so that on one night when thinking about boys from books or your favorite artists wasn't enough during moments under your sheets when your back arched and your fingers trailed up your thighs, your mind switched from people you would never meet to him, to Rick. Your eyes scrunched tighter, and you tried to shake it away, telling yourself it was just the women in town and the talk in the car getting to you. But then you thought about how rich and hot pink his lips looked on a bright sun-burning day and how it would feel like flames firing inside of you if he kissed you with them.

Ideas like these went on for nearly a year now. You even started questioned if maybe you had always liked him, maybe you were always just like the other girls even though tried to not be. You had thought it made you respectful, realistic; after all, how could Rick be the love of your life if he was everyone’s? Wonderings like this became even worse and more confusing when Rosita had asked if you’d like to move in with her. Becoming closer with her meant being around the leaders more often, which meant coincidental encounters and conversations with Rick as well. Quickly, he wasn’t just that president or celebrity anymore who talked to you sometimes and got you that stereo that once. He was becoming a peer— at least in some ways. One who was curious about your interests as much as your opinions. But it’s not exactly like you were in the in-crowd now as some people assumed. You didn’t get to go to leader meetings, and as much as you knew Rosita must have been telling you more than others know, she couldn’t have been telling you everything. But you did see him more than other people now, when he and the leaders came over to the house or when Rosita was invited over to theirs and she’s tell you to come too. And now, with these thoughts spiraling, you can’t help but to look back at the at the times where Rick approached you, gave you all his attention no matter how small it was and asked you about what you were listening to or reading that week, letting you ramble. He was an older guy, yes, but he cared, he actually listened, and he didn’t make you feel like the childish little sister others do.

Sadly, you did become the fawn like you had told yourself you wouldn’t be. But you couldn’t stop picturing him when you closed your eyes, and in fact, it was nice to imagine someone to fall asleep with, to wake up to. It was just going be your secret. Part of your fantasy world. But then— it all caught up to you.

Through the sliver of the open door he saw you, fingers between folds, goading yourself on as you chanted his name in whispers.

And to your surprise, he encouraged it. No, he did so much more than that— he helped you, made you come; gave you your first orgasm and made you his like no one has before.

You loved it. You gave into it. Even if it was just one secret moment. It made you give into the idea that this would continue but of course, it didn’t. He hasn’t spoken to you in almost three weeks until—

“Woah-” you gasp, almost crashing into just the person as you exit your room.

“Sorry,” you both say in unison, holding onto each other's forearms before quickly letting go. Your arms cross over into your chest before dropping as you enter your room again, clearing the hallway, and his hands go behind his back. He’s still as unsteady as you are, his mouth is slightly open, thinking of what to say.

“Hi,” you whisper tentatively.

“Good morning,” he politely replies. His eyes now smile slightly as he nods to you. You don’t miss how the light emanating from your bright room makes them shine. And he doesn’t miss how the light shining behind your figure makes you, in your white cotton sundress, look like an absolute angel.

“Good morning,” you repeat, giggling slightly, not knowing what else to say.

“Good morning,” he says again, lost and as giddy as you are.

“Oh wait— is the leader’s meeting here today?” Rick starts to nod and answers yes as you continue to speak, “I totally forgot! I’m sorry. I know I should be gone by now.”

He shakes his head, “It’s fine. I was just going to the bathroom.”

“Here? Was someone in the one downstairs?”

“Just wanted to be away from everyone when they came. Daryl and I came early so we started talking and I just- we didn’t see eye to eye on something. I needed a minute.”

You nod. That seems to be your signature when to talk to him. You hated it honestly. Often over-analyzing your words, worrying you’ll sound immature or stutter in front of him. “I'm sorry,” you tell him sympathetically. For a moment there is only silence which makes you worry he will go away, so without thinking, you ask: “I know you’re busy but, if you need a moment, maybe you would like to come in here instead?”

Rick freezes but then, inevitably agrees. As he enters, you close the door and quickly go to shut off the low playing stereo and rehang some of the dresses on your chair in the closet— you had been getting ready for the day. Rick goes to sit on the chair after you empty it but you stop him. You sit on the vertical side of your bed and guesture Rick to sit in the spot next to you, closer to the headboard. You wanted to sit next to him.

Rick doesn’t question this, maybe he wanted to be as close to you as you had, so as he sits, your thighs touch. You try not to move too much at the first contact. Still, the heat that starts to burn inside you makes you realize how much you’ve craved this. Can two weeks feel like a lifetime? It’s like you haven’t felt him in ages.

“What were you playing today?” He asks and you realize you eyes went straight to the area where yours and Rick’s legs touched. You know he noticed but still you try to answer normally.

“Selena. Rosita loves her. It’s one of her most famous songs: Amor Prohibido.”

He nods. “I probably wouldn’t understand a bit of it,” he laughs.

He would probably remember the singer from the news if you gave more context but you don’t. There is a silence that follows until you ask, “So,” starting slowly, “what’s wrong? Is Daryl aright?”

He doesn’t answer. His mouth is open as if he’s deciding what to say, but nothing comes out, so you continue, “You know, nothing is ever right in the world when Rick and Daryl fight. It makes me sad.”

The joke makes those lines at the sides of his eyes appear— a quiet laugh. “Well you know I’d never want to make you sad. Especially not you.” You two exchange a light smile while that heat rises fast to your heart. “We’ll be fine,” he finally says, but then he goes quiet again. Rick seems unsure if he wants to continue. He even looks at the door, wonders if the others have shown up yet, but— he knows he doesn’t want to leave. And even more, he knows he shouldn’t after ignoring you like some teenage boy. He decides to tell you what’s happening: “Daryl wants us to bring new people in. You know how he’s always going out there. But I think it’s way too soon.”

You hum agreeingly, but at the same time, you understand Daryl. “I think he just likes to give people what he never used to have,” you suggest.

“I know,” he nods a bit annoyedly; “and that’s a nice way to put it, but you know him, when he has his mind set on somethin’ he can be so damn stubborn. It’s frustrating. He won’t compromise or listen to anything.”

Endearingly, you try to withhold a laugh, your lisp pursing. Not only because when he says anything, it actually sounds like anythang, but because Rick sounds like he’s describing himself and he doesn’t even realize it.

“And,” he adds, pausing for a moment before he continues, scratching his beard. It looks as if maybe he shouldn’t tell you what he’s about to. His head hangs low to say: This is not information for everyone to know, okay? But the last time he went out there with Glenn, the reason Glenn’s arm is in a sling right now, is because they met a group, tried to bring them back and before they could make it even close to home, the group fought ‘em, tried to steal what they scavenged, and almost kill Glenn.”

You widen your eyes at the statement. You actually already knew this from Rosita, but that will stay between you two. All you feel is humbled that he felt he share it with you, despite it being a dark thing. It was a close call. Rick was right for being very cautious right now. “Wow,” is all you can get in before he speaks again.

“Imagine if we lost him. Fought this war with his wife and unborn baby at the time for nothing? So he couldn’t even meet him?” Rick shakes his head, and you notice his foot tapping lightly, making his knee bounce. This had happened a month ago now but it was obviously affecting him. “It was reckless and I told him that. That right now we need to be focusing on what’s inside these walls. People have only just started getting back to being comfortable now; to feeling like this is a home.”

Your eyes remain wide, “We did so much rebuilding you.”

“We did complete rebuilding.” He corrects, though not rudely. Shaking his head, he goes back to talking about Daryl: “I think I made it seem like what happened to Glenn was his fault. So not only were we arguing but I must’ve hurt him,” Rick realizes, “and now he definitely won’t be back today— maybe not even until next week.”

A silence hangs in the air after this; it seems he finished. Now, you know you should speak, but as the silence continues, you grow more unsure of what to say. Issues like these are things you’ve never dealt with. You didn’t want to say something stereotypical.

“I’m sorry I’m putting all this on you.”

“No, no,” you quickly console, trying to think. “Um, well,” you say, starting unsteadily, “this is probably going to sound stupid and not helpful. I don’t even remember the exact context or what was truly said so it might not make any sense either but, do you remember when I had my Oasis obsession? Earlier this year?”

“I do,” he laughs, turning his head over to your music table. His eyes scan any of the visible album titles to see if he can find it, but the print on most of them are too small. He turns back to you as you continue:

“This is going to sound a little far off but I think you and Daryl are like Liam and Noel.”

His eyebrows furrow, “Didn’t those two hate each other?”

“I mean, yes— but it’s much more complicated than that to me— but no, I don’t mean in that way. It just that there is this quote Noel says that I don’t remember exactly, but I really liked: he said that even though he wrote the music and Liam did the singing that Liam meant the words just as much as Noel did because they’re brothers and he wrote them. I thought that was beautiful, but…” you trail off.

He stays silent, trying to give you space to find your words but you feel like you’ve gone too far. It’s all pretty convoluted and not a true comparison to what’s going on that you’re even confusing yourself a little. “I think what I mean is that even though they have their different roles, they still feel very similar things and believe in the same purpose. I think that’s like you and Daryl. You two are so similar yet so different. But there’s still a binding force that always brings the two of you together. So, like I’m sure you already know and I didn’t even need to tell you, but you two will be okay. You two have different ways of doing things, but the music or the life you’re trying to create in Alexandria still has the same meaning to the both of you.” You laugh small and breathily as you end. “That probably didn’t make sense.”

Rick smiles to himself. “I didn’t get that first bit, with the quote, but no… that made a lot of sense to me.” He nods toward you and you return his smile. “You’re so bright. You know that? Not everyone knows how to stitch things together like that the way you do.”

This makes you feel good. Rick thought you were smart. You know you should say thank you, but instead, something else comes out: “May I, may I kiss you?”

“Yes,” he answers, almost stuttering it out, a hint of hesitation before he did, but he nods so kindly, so reassuringly as he tells you again: “yes.”

Your fingers touch his lower cheeks lightly, feeling the bristles of his beard. You’re slow, and careful, and scared. Your fingers linger on his jaw for a moment until they completely caress his right cheek and then you move in, swiftly— worried you’ll lose your confidence, worried he’ll change his mind. You catch his lower lip and seal the kiss. Your lips are locked for a few seconds until you retreat. It was nice, and exciting, but short. You knew you could have put your tongue in his mouth. You believe he would have let you because you remember when he did it last time, but you didn’t want to embarrass yourself by doing it wrong and once again reminding him how much you don’t know. But you’re sure giving him a grade school kiss like this one was enough of a reminder.

Your eyes roll down, chin low. Your cheeks are on fire and your hands do not know where to go so you start fiddling with the hem of your dress and then you laugh. You were trying to be courageous this time, and you were, but you also weren’t.

Rick grabs your left hand, holding it at the end of your thigh, “I liked that,” he says softly.

“You did?” You ask as softly as he, eyes meeting his.

A short, airy snicker comes out, “Mhm,” he hums, giving you a closed-mouth smile. He found you simply adorable.

“Can I… try it again?”

Rick pulls on your forearm, attempting to bring you closer to him. “Yeah,” he nods, voice gentle. “Do you want me to help?”

You nod before you speak, happily accepting, “Yes.”

He puts your hands on his shoulders. One of his grabs onto your waist and the other holds you lightly under your chin, adjusting your head to meet his lips. The first kiss he places holds just for a couple of moments as the one you gave him did, gentle but packed with longing. The next two are slow, pretty pecks that already have you melting at his touch, lips agape waiting for the next one. The fourth is the one where he brings his tongue into your mouth, carefully bringing it in quarter by quarter. He tastes the top of your mouth and tongue and you feel him as he slowly starts to explore how far you may like to go, but truly you become stagnant other than your hands that press into his shoulder. Luckily, Rick either doesn’t notice your hesitation or is already silently helping you as he takes the lead, pulling you closer by the hips and slipping his tongue in and out of your mouth to kiss you more. It makes you smile— the excitement of your first make-out session. You giggle, and then it makes him smile too and your teeth slightly bump into each other. Accidently you nip his lip because of it, making you pull back.

Your fingers hover over your lips as you impart a quiet apology but Rick just shakes his head giving you another quick kiss instead. He starts to move back on your bed, back pressed again the headboard and he tells you quietly, “Come here.”

You get up and sit higher up on the bed as well, calves folded under your thighs. He takes one of your legs and starts to put it over his as he asks, “Is this okay?”

You nod, vigor growing as you do it now, thrilled to sit on his lap. Your dress bunches around your hips and the tops of your thighs. You move closer to press your chest into his and you kiss him first again, another small one but with intent as you look at him afterward, feeling the scratch of his beard on your fingertips as you smile at him, in awe that this is happening.

“You want to try this time?”

“Uh,” he means you put your tongue in his mouth this time, but you’re afraid to do it wrong but you know you want to say yes so you do, “Yes, okay.”

So he brings you in again and you kiss him. He mouth opens a little and you try to bring your tongue in slightly but you teeth clash. “Sorry,” and quickly he responds that it’s okay and rubs your cheek, telling you to just open your mouth a little wider, no teeth, let your tongue go on top of his.

You try it. Your tongues meet again, licking each other tips before you slowing press in more, your chest touching his as you try to close the gap.

Rick starts slowly rocking your hips against his and he takes control of the kiss again. It helps you not think, you like it. And you like the feeling of that incoming tight bulge starting to form under his jeans, but then you let go. “Wait,” you say, “I like this.” You pause for a moment, confusing him more as to why you stopped. “But… there is something I wanted to ask you.”

“Okay,” his hand stay fixed on your hips and waist, rubbing soothily, “What it is?”

Another pause. “I feel nervous,” you whisper.

“You have no reason to be, sweetheart. You can ask me anything.”

You laugh, smiling as you look off to the side. Anythang.

He smiles too, although unknowingly to what you found funny. His head tilts as he tries to find your gaze and turn it towards him again.

“Well, the last time we were together here you taught me how to do something. You taught me how to pleasure myself better so,” you stutter, “I want to pleasure you. If that’s okay. And I was wondering if you’d teach me how- to touch you here.” You remove yourself from straddling him and point in the direction of his cock.

Instantly he feels a stir of his already hardening dick.

This is not how he expected things to go this time. Or truly, he didn’t expect any of this at all, but when you asked to kiss him he decided he would be gentle, more giving. It felt like you wanted him to take again, the exact thing he was trying not to do. “I feel like I took advantage of you last time.”

“Rick…” you shake your head. “I’m the one who didn’t close the door all the way. You asked if it was okay and then you asked if you could go faster. I said yes to everything…” You start to worry— is he second guessing everything now?—“I feel maybe we remember this differently.” You bow your head again now. Feeling ashamed, wondering if he did.

Rick places one hand on your knee to comfort you although he still says, “It’s just that I’ve never done something like this before.” His thumb sways on your skin. “I just don’t want you to end up feeling like you’re wasting your time. Your first times.”

You’re surprised, “It’s so funny how you can be so self-assured in front of a crowd and now you don’t think you’re good enough.” You take his hand and press it towards your chest. Your heart was racing. “I like you. So much.” You swallow as he says your name softly, realizing how fast your heart was going. “No one in town is truly ever mean to me or anything, and Rosita has been so kind with letting me move in with her and we talk and its nice but, you know— she has her flings and her friendships that are separate from mine and everyone just always seems like they have their person and I just don’t. I don’t have my person, or any person.” You remove your hands from your chest but Rick still holds onto it, squeezing your hand as you start speaking again. “You’re kind, Rick, and you make me excited, and you remember things about me… “ If your face could get any hotter, it does, “And, well, you’re very handsome. If you could teach me again, I would like that.”

God… Rick was trying to be a romantic yet you were so adamant on getting him off. He laughed inwardly, shaking his head, deciding that the best way to handle this situation— and make up for some of his guilt as he was trying to— would be to give you the thing you say you want and not what he thinks you want. Suppose that’s one for widower’s wisdom.

Decidedly, Rick gets up from the bed, giving you a once over, still admiring how adorable, and how sexy, you look to him with your feet under your lap, hands on your knees as you look up at him from the bed and your white dress. He starts undoing his shirt buttons. “Remember when I did this the first time?”

A smirk came on, there’s the Rick you remember. Blue eyes intense, and voice getting cocky as he gets ready to give you what you need, what he knows you only want from him.

“Yes,” you say quiet yet with budding excitement. You start going for the hem of your dress, “Should I start taking this off too?”

“Mm, stay like that.” He’s taking off his belt. “Thought you looked beautiful in it right when I saw you.”

Your thighs squeeze together slightly. Rick Grimes was undressing before you, for you, and calling you smart and beautiful all the while.

As Rick lowers his boxers, his cock springs up. He returns to his spot on the bed, back leaning against the headboard. All of a sudden he seems to truly recognize that he is the only one exposed. He would tell you what to do, guide you, but in a small way, in a way you probably didn’t realize, you were in control. It seems that each time this happens— although it’s only been twice— and each time he talks to you— which has been plenty— you steal a little more of Rick’s heart and he just can’t stop it.

“So,” he clears his throat, your eager eyes on his cock making him twitch, “you usually just wrap your hand around, start from the base and keep pumping up.” He shakes his head, “there’s not too much too it but it’s best to keep your hand light at the start, you—”

You nod quickly, “May I?”

As he nods back you, “Yes.” And as he says it you’re already licking your hand.

“Is it okay if I spit? That helps right? Or is that nasty to you?”

He’s caught off guard, “No, no, that helps.”

So you do and you place your hand lightly at the base as he said and you start to pump. Instantly, he lets out a gasp, and the next noises that follow are repressed grunts and groans. You want to ask him to stop doing that but you’re a little scared to speak up that way just yet and you’re too engrossed in how you can see the light veins of green and blue on him and how he’s so red at the tip. It was honestly exciting. Just this, touching him with your hand, staring at his member and watching him twitch as his mouth opens to pant lightly. It still felt unreal but you liked it and you were happy to learn. You start to pump him more towards the top, placing your thumb on his slit- pressing in. His abs clench at that. You push in a little harder and you squeeze your fist around him a little— testing it out to see what happens—and he groans, unadulterated this time, “oh, fuck.”

The heel of your foot that’s under your lap pushes into your center at that.

You start pumping faster. “Am I doing good, Rick?”

Hearing your voice sets him off, “Fuck, sweetheart. Yes.” He’s honestly choking out each of his words, he didn’t expect to get so turned on by all of this. He realizes the last time he had sex was with you that first time, and before that… he can’t even remember. “You’re doing an amazing job.”

As you pump, you start to slow down, only doing it shallowly towards his base. You’re feeling confident and you kiss the side of him, licking a fat stripe up to the top and then you pump him fully again.

“Oh, fuck, yeah,” he breathes out. He wants to tell you to slow down but it comes out of nowhere, he stutters before he can even speak. An unintelligible groan mixed with a moan comes out abrupt and louder than he intends and white spurts of liquid come out.

You go faster for a few moments, then start to slow down, a little unsure of what is best to do, but you notice when you start squeezing him a little more as you continue to pump up and more whiteness fall out from inside of him.

“Did I, make you come?”

“Yeah,” he says, huffing.

“I did?” your cheekbones rise as you ask with awe— it was another first for the books.

Rick’s tries to let his embarrassment fade, he can tell you were just excited about it, but still, he looks down and to the side, avoiding direct eye contact— almost like you typically would. You peer at him, almost nervously because of it. Rick is usually the confident one. “Doesn’t always happen that fast,” he explains.

“Well before a month ago I didn’t know how to make myself come so I wouldn’t know,” you say with self-deprecating assurance. You had heard from the girls in town that it was easier to make men orgasm. You already had it in your head as something not to judge. You wonder how hard he must have been restraining himself the first time he placed himself inside you, or if it just happened to be easier for him that time around. “I didn’t expect I could do it or anything really. I thought it was…” you smile while giggling, “interesting.”

“A good interesting I hope.”

“Very,” you assure. “I liked it.” You kiss his cheek as you take some wipes that are by your night stand and you start cleaning him up. He doesn’t tell you that you don’t have to; he helps along with you.

“You sure you’ve never done any of this before?”

You shake your head. “I just read fiction books.”

He smiles to himself, a quiet snort of laughter leaving his nose. You always surprise him.

When you two are done cleaning, he puts his boxers back on. Quickly, he is on the bed again and starts to kissing you. Rick holds your shoulder and pushes you down. Finally, it’s time for his redemption, he feels. It was your turn to be pleasured. Just like he wanted to do from the beginning.

Rick kisses down your neck to your collarbone, and the parts of your exposed chest and he pushes your dress up past your hips. His lips move back up to yours, kissing you more before saying, “I really wanna show you something sweetheart.” He presses his thumb into your clit over your underwear. “Can I kiss you down there? Have you ever had that before?”

You shake your head slowly, eyes wide. “I-” you start nodding your head, “-I would really like that.” And in such a small voice you add, “Please.”

Rick kisses your cheek. Deep and softly he breathlessly tells you, “I would love to.”

Rick moves his head lower and gives you slow kisses over your underwear from your mound to the end of your lips. He starts to drag your panties over your legs and once they’re gone he kisses up your thighs. Then his nose rubs and sways ever so lightly on your lips. He breathes in and it makes you shutter. Your heart is going crazy again. Finally, he licks upward. One long and languid stripe ending with a kiss to your clit and then he truly begins.

Tongues are wet and sticky and everything you ever dreamed of. Your eyes roll back instantly from that first lick and kiss. You remember a time when you started touching yourself that you used to never think of receiving oral. You thought it was scary, nasty, that you wouldn’t like it until the moment you thought about it as a million kisses on your most sensitive lips, or someone liking you so much that they’d get drenched by your wetness just to touch you, to taste you. After that, you thought about it all the time and now it was finally happening– someone needing you so much they just had to know what you taste like. Here he was: kissing, licking, sucking, not caring about how he looks but only how you feel— you now knew what it was like to be desired.

Rick presses his tongue flat on your clit, rubbing deep circles. His eyes are open, looking up at how your mouth opens wider and wider. You let out little whimpers, enamored by his tongue, still deciding if you like the scratch of his beard, but your eyes stay glued to the ceiling, scared to look at the scene below.

He gives you kitten licks in between speaking, “Look down. Don’t miss your first time.”

Your eyes go down slowly, watching as he gives open mouth kisses to your clit and right lip, tilting his head. He stays there for a moment, hearing your short and breathy pants, kissing and licking your clit and lower lips like they were the ones above your chin. His eye contact sends bursts of sticky wet fluid down your hole and you release a whimpered moan, they’re always sp short and soft and high pitched. He can tell you like it but he can also see you’re nervous. You don’t trust yourself, you know it, and he’s starting to realize it too. You’re scared of completely letting go.

He peppers kisses to your clit before moving upward, his tongue rolling and mouth kissing from your lower stomach to your breasts till his face reaches yours again. “No one’s here,” he tells you. He then kisses your lips allowing you to taste yourself for the first time. “Relax,” he whispers, rolling out each syllable. He holds your chin with one hand while he inserts a finger into your hole with the other, his pointer is instantly drenched and you shudder at the feeling. His single calloused finger reminds you of the time he was last inside you. He pumps slowly, looking into your eyes as he speaks, “Don’t think about who could come downstairs.”

“What if Rosita or Daryl come back?”

“What if?” He says it so simply as if he’s ready for everyone to know. Truly, that would be an issue, but right now it was not about him and it was completely about you; he wanted to give. It was short-sighted, reckless, yes, but… you were just so pretty, so bright, so insightful, and he felt like he needed to make up for all the taking he did last time, of your first time. Rosita had went to run after Daryl, hopefully no one was here anyway. But again, he didn’t care. It didn’t matter. “Lay back,” he gently commands, “forget what I said before- close your eyes. Just give in to it. Like I’m the only one who's here.”

Rick licks zig zag stripes down your slit and then he decides to insert his tongue in your hole. He goes as deep as his tongue allows, collecting your wetness and trying to swallow it in moments when he turns back to kissing. He his nose is brushing and rubbing up against your clit as he sucks wetness from down below and you start letting out stringy moans you can’t control. Soft, pretty, and continuous, “uh, ah, uh, uh” that turn into “sorry, I’m sorry.” You’re still self-conscious about your own noises. This was still only the second time you’ve heard the sounds you make when someone else is fucking you.

But Rick shushes you. Giving small kisses to your clit as he looks up at you, seeing your scrunched eyes and open mouth. “I like knowing you like it, pretty girl. I like all those pretty sounds you’re making.”

Your pussy tightens around nothing at that phrase.

“Keep going. You don’t have to be shy.” He grabs your chin and you look down at him. His beard is wet. “We’ve already made a mess anyway.”

He starts kissing your labias, licking up wetness when you decide to ask, nervously, “Can you make sounds too?”

Instantly, Rick goes again to kiss your clit, humming into it as he sucks. Breathing against you he says, “Want me to tell you I like it, sweetheart?” His tongue slides down again, tongue reaching into your hole and he moans into your pussy.

Your back arches and you mewl, you could almost scream.

That’s it, he thinks. Rick keeps humming and groaning into you now. His voice is so seductive. “I love tasting your pussy, baby.”

You couldn’t breathe.

Rick starts rubbing your clit with his thumb and going fast with his tongue in your hole “My bright, pretty girl gonna come for me? Hm?”

“Oh, Rick, I want to. Please, Rick.”

Rick starts to go faster and your brain turns to mush. Only noises coming out and when he stops his tongue movements to say something more you push his head down. “Sorry,” you say. You’ve never been forceful before but he says nothing, just continues going down on you and taking his free hand to place it over his, gesturing that he wants your hands in his hair. You tug on his curls and he grunts into you. You start chanting his name and then he switches to placing his lips on your clit and putting two fingers in your pussy. It reminded you of the first time but instead of your three fingers they were two of his and it felt so much better than you ever knew before, better than you could ever do it yourself. It sets you off. Your eyes shut tighter if they could. “Rick! Oh my god,” you moan and then again and again and then you come.

Rick laps at your cunt, vigorously trying to wipe you clean. He makes it look like it will be the last and only time. It makes you worry but at the same time he looks so sexy like that; needy for you even after you finished.

He takes your wipes and cleans his lips before cleaning you up as you did for him. He kisses you thighs and your lips and your cheeks as he continues. “You did such a good job,” he says. “You always do.”

You’re filled with pride at that. “Thank you.” Then worry sets in. You realize how public you’ve made everything. “Did I just ruin your life?”

He laughs while caressing your thigh. That anxious expression of yours that he just got rid of returns after all the work he did.

“I’m gonna check downstairs. Okay? If they’re there, they’re there.” You nod. We already made a mess anyway, you remember him saying. “They might want to start the meeting when I go down so, whatever happens, happens alright? You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Your eyes are still nervous, but it’s all too late anyway. “Okay,” you respond.

“Okay,” he says back, kissing you once more. As he dresses himself again, he tells you, “I promise I won’t wait two weeks to see you again.”

“I’d like that.”

“Me too,” he says as a send off and goes into the bathroom to clean his face.

When he reaches the living room, there is no one. Rick is thankful but confused.

As he nears the coffee table there is a sheet of yellow lined legal pad with a talkie next to it.

Call when you’re done, it reads.

“Rosita?” He questions into the device. Who else could it have been, right?

He can almost hear the grin on her face. “They should start calling you Reckless Rick for all the agony you put these Alexandria girls through.” She pauses for dramatic effect. “There’s just something about that stupid hair cowboy accent, I guess.”

Before he can respond, telling her that it’s absurd to think of him as a playboy, that he was far from it, she continues:

“So, fucking my roommate? You’re glad Glenn and Maggie called everyone over to theirs instead. Hershel took his first steps while you were teaching someone else how to take theirs.”

She unpressed the button to suppress her laughter. “Just get over here,” she concludes, putting down the walkie and going back to meet the rest of the group with a perfect poker face. She tells everyone Rick will be here shortly.

Oh, Alexandria’s leader and her new little best friend who has been hearing the townswomen’s fantasies of him for years: Reckless Rick and his reckless romantic girl.

Rosita would give you so much shit for this when she gets home.

[fastbrother]

Detention (E, 1k words)

Harry spends his eighth year recontextualising his relationship with Draco Malfoy.

Tags: Only One Broom, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Fluff and Smut, Praise Kink, Top!Harry Potter

Author's note: Drarry one-shot I wrote for @kk1smet's birthday. Thank you for creating such wonderful art for this fandom, and for letting me use it here! K's original art post can be found here, and you can see more of her art at the bottom of this post!

* * *

They’ve been fighting since—well, since forever. But also since noon. The sky is dark now, and Harry has run out of patience. He turns on his heel, leaving Malfoy to scream into the void.

“Just where do you think you’re going?” 

“I’m going back to the castle. We’ll come back tomorrow.”

“Out of the question. I’m not spending another day—”

Harry can’t think of many things crueller than the detention McGonagall came up with for them. Another day stuck in the forest with Malfoy and he might just crack. But he’s already cracked, hasn’t he? He’s cracked about a thousand times today. 

“Suit yourself. If you can find unicorn hair in the dark, then by all means, go and find it. I’m going back.” 

And with that, Harry mounts his broom.

“Don’t you dare leave me here alone.”

“Then hop on.”

There’s a break, a little silence.  

“Fine. We’ll go back. But I’m flying.”

“Whatever,” Harry says, too tired for another fight. He dismounts, and offers the broom to Malfoy. 

The sound of crushed leaves fills the air as Malfoy comes closer, then grabs the broom in one swift motion. 

They get on.

Why did Harry think it was a good idea to only bring one broom? He’s uncomfortable, seated much too low, and has nowhere to put his hands. He hates not being in control of it, too. Malfoy flies with too much grace, a sin he didn’t know existed until that very moment. 

Time passes slowly.

Harry’s just got used to the precarious balance when a Thestral whizzes by.

“Ah,” Harry says, against his will, and wraps his hands around Malfoy’s waist. At the same time—or was it earlier?!—Malfoy’s hand lands on Harry’s calf, making Harry swallow the sorry he was about to blurt out. 

Surely, Malfoy will say sorry himself. Or remove his hand. 

He doesn’t. 

So Harry doesn’t remove his hands either. 

They land, and Malfoy’s hand lingers for a second too long.

They’re silent on the way to the castle. It’s bizarre, because the two of them are never silent. They bicker in class, when they’re forced to sit together for “the optics.” They bicker in the corridors, when they bump into each other. They bickered all day today. And now they’re silent, too silent, and the ghost of Malfoy’s touch buns a hole through Harry’s jeans.

Their footsteps echo against the stone walls. And then they stop. They’ve reached the staircase where their paths diverge. Harry has to go up the stairs, while Malfoy carries on.

They look at each other, neither of them moving. Then, at the same time, they act. Malfoy clears his throat. Harry walks towards a broom closet. 

Malfoy follows him in. It’s dark, much too dark to see, but he hears Malfoy dropping to his knees. He lets out a sound when he feels Malfoy’s hands parting his robes. The sounds intensify when Malfoy takes his cock out, and puts his mouth on it. It’s all so unexpected, so wonderfully wet and generous, Harry feels around until he touches Malfoy’s head. He’s really there. 

Fucking Draco Malfoy. Is on his knees. Sucking him off. 

Harry finishes in his mouth, and only afterwards realises he’s been panting. 

* * *

Harry corners Malfoy after Charms. Since last night, he’s had time to think. Truly, he’s had so much time to consider everything that’s ever happened between them, all the nuances of their relationship, all the ways in which they came together. And with all that knowledge safely stored in his brain, Harry locks the door.

Malfoy sinks to his knees. The light spills through the arched windows, and Harry can look into his eyes as he takes Harry in. 

“Jesus Christ,” Harry says, watching Malfoy’s lips strain against his cock. “I want to fuck you.”

Malfoy is a good little boy, because he releases his cock, stands up and bends over Flitwick’s desk. Harry lifts up his robe. 

“You’ve finally shut up,” Harry says, inserting one finger into Malfoy’s hole, pulling a moan out of him. “I love that.”

Harry doesn’t really know what he’s doing, but figures out enough. When he’s close, he pushes Malfoy back on his knees and comes all over his face.

Malfoy licks it off his lips. He’s finished in his pants.

* * *

Harry fucks Malfoy everywhere he can. He fucks him in deserted classrooms. In broom closets. The prefects’ bathroom. He fucks him so much and so often, they’ve both fallen behind on schoolwork. When they get detention for it, Harry fucks Malfoy on the forest bed. 

* * *

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” Harry says, looking down at Malfoy. It’s the Christmas hols, and all of Malfoy’s roommates are away. It’s the first time they fuck in a bed.

“You’re beautiful,” Malfoy says, and drags Harry into a kiss. 

* * *

“You’re insatiable,” Draco says when Harry falls into step with him after breakfast. “We have Potions in five minutes.”

“Five minutes is plenty of time.”

Draco rolls his eyes, but lets Harry drag him into a broom closet. 

They waste most of the five minutes kissing, and then another five undressing. By the time Harry comes all over Draco’s chest, the bell ringing is a distant memory. 

“If we get detention again, I’ll kill you,” Draco says while he picks up his robes from the floor. 

“Don’t worry,” Harry says, cleaning them off both. “You go first.”

Harry waits two minutes before going into the classroom. 

“Professor, sorry I’m—”

His gaze falls on Draco, sporting a red tie and looking at Harry in horror. Just like everybody else.

Harry looks down at his own green tie. 

“—late,” he concludes, amidst rising bouts of laughter.

“Shh,” Slughorn says, trying and failing at suppressing a grin. “Ah, nothing like young love, is there? But also, detention to the two lovebirds.”

Harry shrugs at the Gryffindors’ shocked faces, then sits down next to Draco. 

“Sorry,” he whispers, a hand on Draco’s knee under the table.

“I’ll never forgive you,” Draco says solemnly. 

That night, they fuck—and sleep—in Harry’s bed.

Super adorable chibi art of them fondling each other on the broom © @kk1smet! 💖

[hellodarling1357]

Tiny Toes: Part 6.4 - Cassian x Reader

This went in a completely different direction to what I had planned and basically wrote itself so buckle up for a whole heap of tooth-rotting fluff 🥰

Summary: Birthday Parties + Forgotten Conversations + Family Time

Word Count: 2.6k

You can read the previous part here

It was the day after Ottie’s 3rd birthday party and the three of you were currently sprawled across the living room floor eating left over birthday cake as Ottie lined up all of her presents and did a show-and-tell for you and Cassian.

“This one is from Auntie Elain,” she picked up the beginners gardening set, making sure you both got a good look before putting it down and turning to the next present. “And this is from Uncle Az,” next was a tiny set of Illyrian leathers and a wooden toy sword that was almost an exact replica of Truth Teller, it had left Ottie squealing in excitement upon opening it.

“You are one spoiled little girl, Otts.” Cassian says as he takes in the massive pile of gifts beside her once she had finished going through all of them for the second time that morning, “where are we even going to put all of this?” Ottie just grins at him and nods, yes, she definitely knows how loved she is; Hells, you had even woken up the morning of her birthday to a small bundle of gifts by the front gate that citizens of Velaris had left out for her.

With a sigh you sat up, placing a hand on Cassian’s stretched out leg as you took in the pile of presents and plates littered with cake crumbs.

“How about some actual food?”

Ottie let out a groan, “but there’s still cake that needs to be eaten, it’ll get sad if it’s not in our tummies.”

With a deep chuckle, Cassian pulled himself up to sit beside you, absentmindedly wrapping an arm around your waist as he nudged your foot with his own. “How about we make something really yummy while you play with your new toys, then once we’ve finished eating, we can have more cake?”

With a sceptical look between the two of you, Ottie agreed and was then preoccupied once more as she made her way over to her new paint set that Feyre had gifted her. After a loud groan followed by a stretch as he got to his feet, Cassian stuck out a hand to help pull you off the ground and was then coming up behind you, arms wrapping around your front as you walked into the kitchen together.

“Hi,” he murmured against your ear, keeping his body pressed against your back as you looked around the pantry in search of some food that consisted of some form of nutrients. You hummed in response, turning around and leaning up on your toes to pull him in closer for a kiss.

“Hi,” you repeated against his lips, smiling as his arms wrapped tightly around you.

“I’ve missed you…” he whispered, leaning down to trail kisses along your jaw then down your neck.

“I’ve missed you too, which is crazy because we’ve been together constantly the past few days.”

“Not quite the same though, is it? Not with the house being overrun by overbearing family members and small children everywhere. This is the first we’ve been alone since before Ottie’s birthday, seeing that she managed to convince us into letting her sleep in our bed to make her birthday even more special.” Cassian said with a roll of his eyes, fully aware of the manipulation tactics his daughter was prepared to use against him in order to get her way.

“Not really,” you mused purely to tease him, “we were alone last night.”

A nip to your ear told you he wasn’t impressed. “Doesn’t count. We both passed out straight away, didn’t even have the energy to get a cuddle in before we fell asleep.”

“What a travesty.” You said distractedly as you wrapped your arms tightly around his neck and pulled his lips back down to slant over yours, letting out a small moan as Cassian backed you into the counter.

“You know,” he whispered against your lips, breath fanning out across your skin, “she’s currently distracted by her ridiculous mountain of presents, we could sneak upstairs for a few moments…”

You grinned in response, letting out a small shriek when he lifted you up, tapping your thighs to prompt you into wrapping your legs around his waist as he reattached his lips to your neck. With near-silent giggles, you clung to Cassian as he quietly made his way towards the stairs, getting three steps up before…

“Daddy?” Ottie’s voice called out from the living room, causing Cassian to let out a frustrated sigh as you dropped your head to his shoulder. “What’s your favourite colour?”

You stifled a laugh as Cassian looked at you, eyes laced with longing despite the perplexed expression on his face. “Umm, green?” he answered, not quite processing his words as the touch of your lips traced along his jaw and your fingers tugged through the hair at the back of his neck.

“Thank you.” Cassian waited a few seconds to see if Ottie would say anything else before raising his eyebrows at you and continuing up the flight of stairs. You managed to get up all of four steps when her voice rang out again.

“Mummy?”

You felt your eyes widen as you let out a shocked splutter, looking to Cassian who seemed to be holding in a laugh at your reaction.

“Mummy?” Ottie called out again, this time in a more demanding tone.

At Cassian’s shrug of indifference, you took in a deep breath before calling back down the stairs to her, patting Cassian’s arm for him to put you back down on the ground.

“Yes, Ottie?” you hesitantly replied, eyes not leaving Cassian’s as he stared back at you, a soft expression crossing his features.

“What’s your favourite colour?”

“Blue.”

“Thank you. Don’t come back until I say you can, it’s a surprise.” She demanded, followed by the sound of the living room door slamming shut.

“What…?” You quietly ask Cassian as he took your hand and led you up the stairs and into your bedroom. After shutting the door behind him, Cassian joined you on the bed and leant against the headboard, the comforting and familiar weight of his arm wrapping around your shoulders had you snuggling in closer to his side. “Mummy? She called my mummy.”

“She did.”

“You don’t seem surprised by it.”

“I was going to mention something the other day but…” he trailed off, glancing at you with a guilt-ridden expression.

“But what?” you deadpanned, sitting up and eyeing Cassian as he averted his gaze.

“I forgot?”

“You forgot? How did you forget? This is huge. Okay, what happened?” you asked excitedly. The two of you had discussed Ottie calling you mum a couple of months ago after an elderly couple had stopped you in the street to talk about what a good parent you were to the little Illyrian. Ultimately, you had both decided to let Ottie steer the situation; when she decided to start calling you mum, if she even wanted to, would be entirely up to her.

“She mentioned something about it the other night when I was putting her to bed,” was the vague answer Cassian gave you, seemingly deciding it wasn’t important enough as taking advantage of a distracted child and an empty bedroom.

“Cassian!” You exclaimed, pulling his head up and away from your neck as you shrugged out of his embrace and fixed him with a look that said nothing would be happening until he talked.

“Ugh, alright. The other night – look, do you really want to talk about this now when she’s distracted, and we’ve got–”

“Cassian…” you repeated, holding back a smile as he threw his head back with a groan.

“Okay, okay. The other night I was tucking her in, and she was all quiet so I asked if something was wrong and she said she wasn’t sure, so I asked again and she said she had been thinking a lot lately but got all hesitant,” Cassian looked at you, a soft smile on his face, “then she asked if it really mattered that you didn’t have her in your tummy before she was born.”

“Oh,” was all you could bring yourself to say, mind going blank as you processed what Cassian had told you and what had been running through Ottie’s mind.

Cassian pressed a kiss to your temple as he took both of your hands in his. “And then,” he continued, giving your hands a squeeze, “when I asked her if it mattered to her, she said, and I quote, no I don’t think it does because I want her to be my mummy and I love her and I know she loves me, or something like that anyway. We chatted a bit more then when I was about to leave she asked me if I thought you would mind if she started calling you mummy.”

You looked at Cassian through tears. “And?” you promoted when he remained silent.

“And,” he gave you a nudge at your impatience, “I told her that you would love it if she started calling you mummy. Y/N, you should have seen the way her face lit up…”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. She was even more ecstatic to hear that than when she unwrapped Az’s birthday present.”

“And you didn’t think to tell me any of this when it happened?”

“Like I said, I forgot.”

“You’re hopeless, you’re also a terrible storyteller…”

“Yeah, yeah. Can we get back to us now? Please?”

With a content sigh you wrap your arms back around Cassian’s neck and climb into his lap, slanting your lips over his as you try to fight back your tears. He pulls you down with him as he leans back against the pillows, arms coming up to wrap around your waist.

“You alright?” he breaks the kiss, letting out a laugh when you nod your response with a small sniff. “You sure? Because you’re currently crying while I kiss you and that’s not the greatest thing for my confidence…”

You laugh as you softly whack him, face lighting up when you see the look in his eyes and the love-filled smile on his face as he watched you from against the pillow. The emotion in that look sent you even further over the edge, a fresh wave of tears welling in your eyes that had Cassian sitting back up with you in concern.

“Y/N?”

“No, I’m fine,” you laugh despite the tears running down your face. “Really, I am. I promise. It’s just Ottie and you and… oh gods.”

Cassian lifts up a hand to wipe away your tears, fixing you with a look of concerned bemusement as you laugh and cry. “Sorry,” you sniff, taking in a deep breath and smiling when Cassian shakes his head to dismiss your pointless apology. “Sorry. Okay, I’m good. It’s just the two of you make me so happy and, you know, a few years ago I never thought I would have something like this and now… Did I ever tell you I almost said no when Elain asked if I would babysit her niece? I don’t even want to think where I would be right now if I hadn’t agreed to.”

Cassian remained silent as he gently cupped your face, thumbs swiping across your cheeks to wipe away the last of your tears before he pulled you into a soft kiss that had you melting against him.

“We would have found each other.”

“Hmm?” You murmured, pouting when Cassian pulled away from you.

With a smile he let his thumb trace over your lips. “We would have found each other,” he repeated, kissing you once more. “If you had told Elain no, I truly believe that eventually our paths would have crossed. Either way we were going to end up here one day.”

You blinked at him, letting the words sink in as your heart filled with such an overwhelming feeling of love. If you let yourself speak, to reply to his words with your own, you knew you would turn into a blubbering mess again. So, instead you pressed your lips to his once more, hoping to convey everything you were currently feeling as you let Cassian lay you down against the mattress, limbs intertwining as he crawled over you, not once removing his lips from yours.

*****

You and Cassian managed to steal an entire hour for yourselves, filling it with soft moans and breathless whispers against sweaty skin as you allowed the overwhelming emotions surging through you to be expressed in the most physical and intimate of ways.

A comfortable silence settled throughout your bedroom as you slowly got dressed, no words were needed in the wake of what you had just shared. Still, the need to be close, to be touching in some way, persevered through the silence as Cassian laced his fingers through yours, bringing your hand up to his lips as you made your way back downstairs. The living room door was still closed, the sound of Ottie contentedly humming to herself had you both leaving her to her own devices.

“We should probably put something together for dinner.” you said, voice barely above a whisper as though not wanting to break the trance you still found yourself in.

“Probably,” was all Cassian said in response as he leant down to kiss you again before leading you into the kitchen.

You sat at the kitchen bench, watching as Cassian looked through the pantry and cupboards, pulling out ingredients as he quietly hummed to himself; you noted, with a smile, that it was the same tune Ottie had been humming.

Pulling yourself out of the seat, you walked around the bench and picked out a bottle of wine, pressing a kiss to Cassian’s cheek as you stood next to him and poured out two glasses while he chopped up the vegetables, bumping his hip into yours as he worked.

“What do you need me to do?”

Cassian looked at you then leant down to steal a quick kiss before saying with a wink, “just sit there and look pretty for me, sweetheart.” You rolled your eyes but sat back in your seat, content in watching him cook as he told you about his and Azriel’s plans for the new intake of Valkyries.

The shuffle of small footsteps across the floorboards had you both looking up to find Ottie walking through the doorway, a piece of paper clasped tightly in her hands.

“Hi, daddy.”

“Hi, princess,” Cassian greeted. Ottie smiled at him then turned to you, lifting her arms for you to pick her up and place her on your lap.

“Hi…” she trailed off, her expression momentarily turning into one of uncertainty as she intensely studied your face. Offering her a smile, you watched as Ottie visibly relaxed against you before saying, almost shyly, “hi, mummy.”

“Hi, sweetheart,” your heart was pounding in your chest as you kissed her cheek, watching with utter delight as her face lit up at your response. “What have you got there?” you asked with a nod towards the piece of paper she was holding.

“Oh!” she exclaims as she shifts in your lap, “I’ve been painting.”

You glance up to where Cassian is standing, only to find him already watching the two of you with a look of complete adoration.

“I love you,” he silently mouths the words to you with a wink when he catches you watching him.

“I love you too” you mouth back before shifting your attention to Ottie and the painting she set atop the kitchen bench of three figures labelled ‘mummy, daddy and Ottie’.

*****

Read Part 7 now!

*****

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Let me know if you want to be added! 🥰

[nkplanet]

FIRST & SECOND

PAIRING: highschool!jungwon x highschool!reader SUMMARY: yang jungwon is your academic rival. the competitiveness between the two of you finally stops when you begin to crack under the pressure WARNINGS: angst (with comfort), toxic parents, jungwon is a little mean, reader skips meals/doesn’t take care of themselves, rushed ending bc i didn’t know how to end this whoopsies WORD COUNT: 1430

NOTE: happy christmas to all who celebrate! and if you don’t, i hope you’ve had a wonderful day anyway. feel free to talk to me about how your day was, even if it wasn’t the best!! 🫶 this fic is my gift to you - enjoy :)

yang jungwon had never been the nicest to you, but it wasn’t like you never reciprocated his snappy comments. sure, you were civil, but the constant competition between the two of you left things tense. even your teachers could sense it, trying to calm things down but failing miserably. you were the highest scoring students in your year, always one or two marks away from each other. some students even placed bets on which one of you would would get the highest scores after exams.

“so,” jungwon drawled from where he was sat behind you, “what do we think this time? personally, i think i’m going to exceed all expectations, and you’ll crash and burn.” you turned around and scoffed, “in your dreams, yang. we both know i’m going to be first this time.”

jungwon simply laughed at you, and you felt anger bubble up inside your chest. it was a math test and, although you were admittedly pretty good at math, jungwon beat you in every exam. his brain was somehow hardwired to remember every single topic you’d ever learned, and he wrote so impossibly fast that he often finished before many were halfway through their tests.

getting home that night, you knew your parents wouldn’t be happy. every time you had an assessment of any kind, they would ridicule you and force you to study until you passed out. tonight wouldn’t be any different.

you were immediately threatened with no dinner unless you studied, a meal which you often skipped in favour of looking over notes anyway. in fact, there were many things that you missed out during the day. you rarely stuck to a skincare routine, as they never fit into your rigorous schedules. it was rare that you really took the time to take care of yourself. although you knew it wasn’t healthy, your parents perpetuated this behaviour to the point where it was now your norm. and so, you began studying. you continued all through the night, almost forgetting to stop for a snack. it was only when you practically passed out on top of your textbooks that you stopped and had some rest.

it seemed when you woke up that your non-stop studying had finally caught up with you. you almost didn’t wake up with your alarm, and panicked after forgetting one of your books. you almost missed the bus but, when you finally got to school and embraced the peace that came with it, a nagging voice in your ear began tormenting you.

“so, almost late today? you’re really slipping, huh?” jungwon teased, leaning on your desk. you glared up at him through your lashes. “i’m not in the mood, yang. leave me alone.” “gosh, so rude. what must your parents think?” that one got you. you but your tongue, despite wanting to both cry and rip jungwon’s head off. you folded your arms and laid your head on them, effectively blocking jungwon out.

he looked confused as he walked behind you to his seat. where was your spark? normally you but him back. were his words really affecting you all that much? he stared at your slumped body in concern, absently flicking through his textbook as an attempt at some last minute revision. you stayed still, not moving a muscle. it was almost like you didn’t care anymore.

in reality, you didn’t. you’d gotten less than jungwon in that test. so much less that you placed fourth in your year. upon hearing of this, your parents went ballistic. they yelled at you, called you a failure and a disgrace, all while you simply sat and stared. you didn’t care anymore. you’d burnt yourself out, and it seemed like you didn’t want to do anything anymore.

people began to take note of your spiral. your teachers, especially, who offered you the minimum they could. you could hear your fellow students murmuring, wondering what had happened for you to fall so far. most of all, jungwon had grown increasingly worried about you. his recent quips (not that there had been many - in fact, he’d laid off a little) had gone unnoticed, and it was like nothing existed to you anymore. your grades continued to fall, as did your rivalry with jungwon.

after an essay, jungwon decided enough was enough. he stopped at your desk, tapping you on the shoulder to wake you from where you were slumped over, sleeping. “what do you want?” you mumbled, not meeting his eyes. “are you okay?” he asked. you could hear concern in his voice but failed to see how or why he felt that way. what if this was all just a trick? “i’m fine, yang. it’s none of your business anyway,” you retorted, looking away from him. “it’s just- you seem really down. you don’t talk to anyone, not even our teachers, and your grades have slipped-“ “is that was this is about? my grades? you couldn’t care less about me, you only want a competition. well, fuck you, jungwon. i don’t care anymore. i’m not gonna be your stupid punching bag.” he took a step back, looking genuinely offended. “fine. if that’s how you want it, that’s how it’ll be. good luck and good riddance.”

the next few weeks were hard. you’d come to realise that jungwon was the only person you really connected with at school, despite your rivalry. the isolation started getting to you, which was how you found yourself seeking him out. he’d been sat at his desk studying in a free period, and the classroom was almost empty. you walked up to his desk, and he looked up from his textbook.

“hi,” you said quietly, your voice cracking and tears coming to your eyes.

he stood up almost immediately, wrapping his arms around you tightly and leading you outside while you cried into his shirt. he shushed you as you continued to sob, stroking your hair. “it’s okay,” he said countless times, “you can cry.” you pushed away from him slightly, looking up at him with wet cheeks and red eyes. “i’m sorry,” you whispered. his heart broke at the sight of you.“you have nothing to be sorry about. if anything, i’m the one that’s sorry - i shouldn’t have said all those awful things to you. it was wrong of me,” he replied softly. you scoffed lightly, “we both said them, we’re both in the wrong here.” he just smiled at you.

you knew eventually you’d have to explain yourself, so you took a deep breath and looked away.

“my parents,” you started. jungwon tried to cut you off, tried to tell you that you didn’t have to tell him, but you raised a hand and continued. “my parents wanted me to be the best. they wanted me to be really smart, to go on to university and make the family proud. every time i got second place, they’d say these awful things. i just kept working harder and harder until i broke, i guess.” jungwon looked at you with something like empathy in his gorgeous eyes. “just how hard did you say you were working?” “hard,” you replied, “i know it’s not right, but sometimes i- i forget to take care of myself. i felt like i needed to forgo things so that i could be better.” he tutted, pulling you against his chest again. some nearby students gawped at you, and he sent them a terrifying glare. “you need to take care of yourself. this isn’t right.”

you simply sighed and buried yourself further into his arms. “i know, but right now i feel better than i have in weeks.” jungwon pulled away from you slightly, a scared look on his face. “listen,” he said, “i have something to tell you.” you became wary, untangling your arms from his. “i’ve liked you for a while. i guess i teased you to, i don’t know, bury the feelings? but i just can’t keep them in anymore. i really do like you.”

you couldn’t find the words to reply. he started to panic, stumbling over words to defend himself, so you did the one thing on your mind - you pulled him in by the collar of his shirt and kissed him.

he short-circuited, standing stiffly before kissing you back. one of his hands reached the back of your neck, while the other rested on your waist. when you separated, he said breathlessly, "i'm guessing that means you feel the same way?" you smiled at him, a sight he'd never be able to get enough of. "yes, you loser. i really like you too."

[scmg11]

HAILEE STEINFELD x READER

BODYGUARD

A/N: HELLO BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE! HOW ARE YOU?

As I got swiped away by inspiration and already wrote 8 chapters for my new book, I wanted to surprise you. So I finished proofreading this a new chapter for you!

Let me know what you guys think.

Sending you so much love ❤️

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Summary: Y/N got assigned as Hailee's new bodyguard but Hailee is not so happy about it.

Warnings: just a little bit of description for harassment, but it will be gone quickly.

Word count: 21840 words.

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The sound of feet covered in combat boots echoing around in the small, empty hallway was the only sound filling the silence around, creating a calming melody to the girl’s ears as she sauntered to a closed door, stopping in front of it and knocking gently, patiently waiting for permission to enter in the office.

"Come in."

The girl opened the door right after and smiled warmly at the person sat behind the big, glass desk in the middle of the room, "good morning."

"What’s it with this formal shit, Y/N!"

"Oh my bad. Hello bitch, how are you doing?" Y/N smiled cheekily at her boss but also her longtime best friend, sitting on one of the two armchair placed right in front of the desk and crossed her left leg over her right, bent over one and looked at her friend expectantly, waiting for a witty remark.

"I would say ‘that’s better’ but I’m not so sure now." Y/N chuckled at her best friend rolling her eyes and winked at her teasingly, "anyway, I don’t want to take too much of your time up. Let’s get to the point and discuss why I called you here today."

"Alright, what is it?" Y/N looked expectantly at Clara, who was now leaning with her elbows on the desk and with her hands linked together, slipping ‘business face’ on.

"I know you got back from your last job about two weeks ago, but I have a new client and requested the best bodyguard I have. I would be a fool not giving you this job."

"Hm, the best bodyguard here. Flattery. A lot of it." Y/N teased with a proud smile, puffing out her chest, before deflating after a snort left her lips when Clara rolled her eyes good-naturedly at her best friend’s antics, "anyway, of course I will take the job, you know I get bored easily at home after a few days off. So who is this new client? A snotty young prince? A dumb heiress? Uh-oh! I know! A stuck-up model with a big God Complex? Ah they are my favorite. Their head is full of themselves, it makes me laugh every single time. Especially when they are male models."

"None of them actually. Luckily I would say." Y/N sighed out in relief at that before both shuddered loudly as they thought over enduring months and months of working with those kind of clients. A fucking tough job. "It’s an actress. She is also a singer and she is starting a tour soon. You will have to follow her around on tour and a few events she is invited to. If you do a good job, which I’m sure you will, more than perfectly, they will have you around her a lot. She is gaining fans quickly and her parents want her safe."

"Sounds good. Easy. Do I know her?" Y/N nodded gently at the job offer and got instantly excited hearing she have to follow the actress around tour. She is always happy with traveling around the world to discover new, amazing places.

"I don’t know. I’ve seen a couple of her movies, maybe you did too. She is Hailee Steinfeld."

"Oh yeah, I remember her. I listened to one of her songs yesterday on the radio. She has a beautiful voice and that song was such a bop."

"Oh great!"

"When am I starting?" Y/N asked in excitement, always wanting to work since she loved her job dearly. She doesn’t know exactly who her new client is, she just knew her name and her voice when she sang, but she will have time to do a small research about her. She always liked to be fully prepared for a body guarding job.

"Well, if you are ready, they would like for you to start now."

"What, now as in now?" Y/N asked in disbelief, her eyes widening in shock as she realized what her best friend just said.

"Yeah, it was kinda fast." Y/N snorted at that as she shook her head in amusement.

"That’s an understatement Clar. But I will accept. How much time do I have to get ready for her tour?"

"2 weeks I think. She is finishing a movie and then she is off for tour. You can meet her today. Her mom called me this morning asking me if it was okay to join them today."

"Sure, no problem. Are we still up for drinks tonight right?"

"Are you kidding me? I’ve been holed up here for the entire week. I need a break."

"Hm, when you say break you actually mean a good fuck right?" Y/N teased her best friend, who looked at her in fake outrage as she placed her hand on her chest feigning taking offense from Y/N’s words.

"Excuse me?!"

"Don’t act so innocent all of a sudden. I’m the one that has to be your wingwoman."

"Go before I decide to fire you as my wingwoman and as a bodyguard."

Y/N chuckled as she sat up and walked around the desk to give her best friend a big, warm hug before promising to pick her up at 7 for their usual Friday night full of drinks. As Y/N exited the building and climbed into her car, her phone dinged with a text message her best friend sent her with all the information she needed about her new job and the location Hailee was actually in right now to go there and meet her. She put the address in her GPS and drove away into the busy streets of LA.

-

"Name please?" Y/N lifted her sunglasses up her head and looked at the security guard outside the set Hailee was filming in, smiling at him politely.

"Hi, Y/N Y/L/N. I am Miss Steinfeld’s new bodyguard. My agency should’ve already sent all the information needed."

"Ah yes. Here you are. You can park right beside Miss Steinfeld’s trailer. You have to turn left, then right, then right again and you should find it right away. Her name is on the door." Y/N listened carefully to the guard’s directions after he lifted the automatic barrier and let her enter the set’s parking lot. "Have a nice day!"

"Thank you so much. Have a nice day!" Y/N followed the guard’s directions and drove through the set’s parking lot, stopping a few minutes later when she saw a trailer parked in the middle of a deserted part of the parking lot with just 2 cars parked near it. Y/N parked her car right beside a a black Porsche and exited the vehicle, locking it before making her way towards the entrance of the trailer to read once again the name on its door and to make sure it was actually Hailee’s trailer.

"Mom, I already told you that I didn’t need a bodyguard. I don’t want one!"

"Haiz please, listen to me. You are going on tour soon and for the first part of it we can’t be there with you. You are gaining fans fast and we are worried about your safety."

"Yeah, you could’ve tied me to my tour bus or you could’ve locked me into my room. It’s the same, right mom?" Y/N listens to two voices argue, loud enough for her to hear it but just quiet enough to not let everyone around them hear them. She didn’t peer around the trailer to watch who was arguing to avoid being caught eavesdropping, but from what she could hear, she assumed she pretty much was the subject of the argument between Hailee and her mother.

"Haiz, I know you are saying this because you are angry at me and your dad for making this decision without asking you for your opinion, but trust me it was a decision made for your own good."

"Yeah, yeah. Sure. Thanks." Y/N was debating in her mind if she should make her presence known or not, fearing she would get caught by someone, especially from Hailee or her mother.

"Excuse me Miss Steinfeld, but we are ready to shoot again." Y/N sighed out loud when she heard someone approach the two women and quickly ran to her car when she heard footsteps approach where she was leaning on the other trailer’s side.

"Thank you Simon. I will be there in 5 minutes."

Y/N had just the time to close her door quietly before two figures rounded the corner from the back of the trailer, taking just a second to look at them before opening her car door and feigning arriving just in that moment as she adjusted her leather jacket before closing her car door and locking the vehicle again, feeling a pair of eyes watching her movements. "Hm, hello?" Y/N spoke up tentatively, feeling a little bit uneasy at the two pair of eyes staring at them.

"Hi dear, can we help you?" The shorter of the two women asked in a gentle and soft voice, smiling politely at her as she approached them, while the taller one stayed in silence, standing beside the shorter woman with a rigid stance, her arms crossed and her face stoic with her eyebrows furrowed angrily.

"Yes, hi. I am looking for Miss Hailee Steinfeld."

"She is right here." The shorter woman pointed to the taller one with a smile just as Y/N stopped in front of them. "I’m Cheri, her mom."

"Oh, nice to meet you Mrs. Steinfeld, Miss Steinfeld, I’m Y/N Y/L/N. I was assigned to you to be your new bodyguard." Y/N stretched her arm over to shake Cheri’s hand first before doing the same with a reluctant Hailee.

"Oh dear, there’s no need for these formalities, just call me Cheri!" Y/N returned Cheri’s warm smile and nodded softly at her request, "anyway, welcome! I’m afraid we don’t have much time to discuss things since Hailee needs to go back on set, but you can stay with me until she finishes for the day."

"That would be great!"

And they were off, walking towards the set with Cheri talking excitedly to Y/N, telling her how excited she is Y/N was assigned to Hailee as her new bodyguard, how much she admired her for doing such a difficult and sometimes dangerous job, and Y/N listened with rapt attention and with slight amusement at the woman’s enthusiasm but she couldn’t help but notice Hailee stayed quiet the entire walk towards the set with her jaw set and her nostrils flared a bit as she stared with furrowed eyebrows ahead of her. "We’ll wait here sweety, then we will discuss everything after you’re done for the day."

"Okay, see you later."

-

After about three hours Hailee joined them back where she left, her face conveying her tiredness but Y/N could still see in her eyes she was still slightly mad at her mom for hiring a bodyguard she apparently didn’t want from what Y/N gathered when she eavesdropped Hailee’s and Cheri’s argument earlier that day.

"I already ordered burgers baby. They should be here soon." Cheri told her daughter as she approached them and when Cheri’s hand caressed Hailee’s bicep, Y/N watched as a bit of her anger slipped away and got replaced by a loving glint.

"Thanks, shall we go?"

Y/N couldn’t help but notice a small change in Hailee’s behavior compared to the one before shooting back on set. Maybe she cooled off a bit or maybe she had time to think over her mother’s words during filming, but Y/N was glad that she actually came around her mother’s decision, decision she found truly heartwarming. "How was shooting, honey?"

"It was good. A little bit stressing towards the end of it since Nelly couldn’t remember the right line and she had some troubles getting it right, but it was fun as always."

"Oh I’m so sorry for her. She must be exhausted."

"Yeah, she came back from another set three days ago. She has so many projects going on right now."

Y/N didn’t know who Hailee and Cheri were talking about but she assumed they were talking about one of Hailee’s co-star. "Y/N, dear, have you already worked for another actress or actor before?" Cheri asked Y/N with a small smile as they approached Hailee’s trailer in the set’s parking lot.

"Yes, I have. Quite a few. I started my body guarding job with an actress actually. I remember being so anxious and so nervous all the time. But with time you develop more confidence, you become more confident, you learn how to control your emotions and act rationally and logically. You have to be strategic when needed and you must have a clear mind when a dangerous situation unfolds before you so you can protect your client."

"Oh wow!" Cheri exclaimed, her eyes shining with curiosity that Y/N found extremely cute but she couldn’t help but notice Hailee scoffing under her breath as she rolled her eyes, now being the one curious about the actress’ reaction to her words.

"Anyway, it becomes ‘easier’ with time, even though there is nothing easy in this job." Y/N clarified with a small smile directed at Cheri, since the singer wasn’t exactly paying attention to her as she fished her iPhone out of her pocket and started texting someone.

"Oh I’m sure. Y/N, I know how much you’ve worked with your agency and how much of an hard worker you are, that’s why I specifically asked for you. I know Clara. She is one of my dearest friend’s niece. I asked her to assign Hailee one of her best bodyguards and she immediately told me your name and everything you’ve done during your time in her agency."

"Yeah, we pretty much funded it together. We started together."

"For how long have you known her?" Y/N watched as sheer curiosity glistened in Cheri’s eyes and felt her chest flutter at how comforting her attitude is. She couldn’t help tilting upward her lips when she noticed Hailee had her eyes still on her phone but she stopped typing away on it, clearly interested in the conversation going on between Y/N and Cheri as she tried to listen carefully even if she was acting disinterested. They arrived at the trailer and settled in, Y/N sitting on a loveseat, while Hailee and Cheri sat on the couch in front of Y/N.

"We met in college. She was my roommate."

"Oh that’s wonderful dear! I’m so glad Clara assigned you-." Cheri got interrupted when a knock on Hailee’s trailer’s door echoed around the makeshift living room, "it must be the delivery guy with our order. One second, I’ll be right back."

"Yeah, sure." Y/N awkwardly looked around the room with her hands entwined, not really knowing what to say now that she is alone with Hailee, but trying to find something to say since she will be her bodyguard from now on and they will need to start some kind of civil relationship between them. "How was your day on set?"

"Good." Y/N had a feeling that that one word answer will be the only thing that will leave Hailee’s mouth and sighed out softly. The singer’s tone wasn’t exactly harsh or conveyed hostility, but it held a dryness in them that told Y/N she was still pretty mad at her mother or even Y/N herself for this situation. Not that Y/N had a say in all of this. She was just doing her job.

"Okay! Here I am!" Cheri came back a minute later, carrying two dark paper bags full of their food and Y/N immediately sat up to go help Cheri, feeling Hailee’s eyes on her in the process but paying no mind to it. "Oh thank you, dear."

"You’re welcome." Y/N smiled widely at Cheri, who grinned back at her with sweetness seeping out of her every pore before they settled everything on the kitchen table, with surprisingly Hailee’s help, who got up a minute after Y/N.

"Let’s dig in. I’m starving." Hailee stated, making her mother chuckle with a fond smile on her lips and gestured to Y/N to eat before joining them.

-

"Have you got everything, honey? Did you pack everything?"

"Yes, mom!" Hailee laughed good-naturedly at her mother’s anxiety as she made her check her suitcases 4 times and go over the list she made of things she had to pack at least 10 times to make sure she packed everything with her before making her finally close her suitcases to bring them down to put them in her tour bus. "I literally have the list memorized by now." Hailee smiled lovingly at her mother as she checked the list for the umpteenth time before meeting her eyes and nodding at her.

"Okay, yeah. You’re right. Sorry. I- I’m just a bit stressed. You’re going on tour and I want to make sure you have everything with you."

"I know mom. I got everything. I checked everything before closing all my suitcases." Hailee smiled warmly at her mother before chuckling softly under her breath with fondness swirling around her brown irises when she watched her mother fold the piece of paper with the list on it and nod gently at her.

"Good! That’s good. Hm, alright it seems you’re ready to go. Oh no! It’s getting late!" Cheri took a look on the watch on her wrist and placed her right hand on her cheek in shock when she looked at the time. They were running a bit late.

"Yeah, we need to go." Hailee hugged her mother before doing the same with her father and her brother then walked in her tour bus and closing the door, making sure to lock it before making her way further into the bus to settle everything down. She felt the bus start moving and sighed out contentedly.

"Hi." Y/N had to swallow the soft snort that was ready to come out of her mouth when Hailee jumped up in fright with a small squeal at Y/N’s voice echoing around the silent bus.

"Oh shit. Fuck! You scared me."

"Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. I didn’t know how to make my presence known without scaring you, I guess I didn’t do a good job." Y/N chuckling softly while scratching the back of her head, the grimacing to try to convey her regret for scaring the singer.

"Well- don’t worry. I guess it’s definitely better than doing a sudden loud noise or something like that."

"Yeah, I guess." Y/N chuckled softly under her breath, emitting another soft chuckle then let a small smile adorn her lips as she looked at Hailee for a few seconds before focusing on her hands in her lap, feeling slightly awkward being in a room alone with Hailee since they had never been alone again since when first meeting almost 10 days prior.

"Hm, what are you doing here?" Hailee asked as she played with her fingers, wringing them gently as she tried to focus her gaze on anything but Y/N, clearly feeling the awkwardness between them. It’s not that they started off on a wrong foot, but Hailee still strongly believes she doesn’t need a bodyguard while on tour and she hadn’t acknowledged Y/N, just the bare minimum.

"Your mom told me to stay here with you." Y/N answered with a serious, business-like tone. She had always been a professional at work and had never, not even once let her emotions show or let them control her, but since Hailee had never been friendly with her, always acting annoyed by Y/N’s presence, almost like she blamed Y/N for being there to protect her when she was just doing her job, she decided to build a wall between them and act just with Hailee just like Hailee is acting with her.

"Oh, yeah right. To protect me." Hailee stressed the word ‘protect’ out with a sarcastic tilt in her tone and Y/N felt annoyance bubble in the pit of her stomach, but she tried to swallow her comeback down to prevent starting an argument with her new client.

"Yeah." Y/N trailed off for a few seconds to collect her thoughts and try to not sound annoyed as she felt to Hailee, "that’s what I do. It’s my job."

"I don’t doubt that, trust me. It’s just that, like I’ve been trying to say for the past 10 days, I don’t need protection!"

"Yeah, I heard you. Your mother heard you. Your father heard you. But they are still worried. Fans can get crazy. They are all amazing, but sometimes meeting your idol makes you go a little crazy. Trust me, I met a lot of them. A few of them were pretty crazy."

"But not my fans."

"I’m not saying that. I’m just saying that fans can be a lot sometimes, especially after waiting for you for an entire day at a venue or at the airport. They are loyal, passionate, loving. And that can get too much sometimes."

"Yeah, sure. Whatever." Y/N resisted the urge to roll her eyes as Hailee dismissed her as she wasn’t paying attention anymore with a wave of her hand and rummaged around the kitchen for a mug. "I’m just changing a few things from now on. When we’re stopping for a break in about an hour, you’re gonna leave me alone. I don’t need a babysitter."

"I’m not a babysitter." Y/N countered back with a strong but still polite tone, crossing her arms and staring at Hailee hard.

"Yeah sure, but I still want to be left alone. I do not agree with my mother’s choice of giving me a bodyguard, but I have to accept it in some way. But what I don’t accept is you staying here when you can easily stay with the crew on the other bus. I want my privacy."

"Okay well. I will go on the other bus as you wish." Y/N gave in dryly, not wanting to keep discussing this subject, stood up right after and, without sparing Hailee another look, walked into the driver’s cabin and asked him to pull over and let her walk out of the bus. Thankfully he stopped immediately after her request, communicating what he was doing to the other driver and without even saying anything else to Hailee, she walked out of the bus and got on the other one.

-

"Yeah, yeah, totally. Oh, yes, we just got here." Hailee opened her tour bus’ door as soon as it stopped, finally arriving in Phoenix, the first city that will start Hailee’s worldwide tour. "Yeah, I am getting off of the bus right now and I’ll go in the venue for the soundcheck."

Hailee stopped in her tracks on the last step to get off the tour bus when she came face to face with Y/N, already waiting for her with her arms crossed and stoic face to accompany her in the venue. "Hi."

"Yeah no, sorry mom. Line got interrupted for a second." Hailee ignored Y/N and visibly rolled her eyes, letting out a huff through her nose as she descended the last step off the tour bus and walked away from Y/N, huffing out again when she heard over her mother’s voice through her iPhone’s loudspeaker steps following her, annoyed about Y/N following her around. "Okay, I will. I need to go now. Okay, bye mom. Love you."

Hailee waited for her mom to say ‘I love you’ back before hanging up the phone. "Are we ready to start our first soundcheck for the first date of this tour?!"

"Hell yeah!" Hailee high-fived her guitarist before doing the same with the drummer, joining her at her sides then walking inside the venue. Hailee took a second to sweep her eyes all over the place, taking it in and smiling widely when she imagined the venue being completely filled with her fans that night. "Hm, I missed this so much." Hailee stated out loud, letting out a sigh as she soaked up in the feeling of finally being back on tour.

"Hey, Y/N! It’s nice to see you again." Y/N smirked smugly when Hailee furrowed her brows and turned her head around in confusion when her drummer said ‘hi’ to Y/N, Hailee then noticed the smug grin on Y/N’s face and rolled her eyes in annoyance before turning back around and walking towards the stage.

"Hey Mick. How is it going? Everything already set up?" Y/N asked enthusiastically at the young man smiling back at her, who walked into step with her as she walked behind Hailee, now a few feet from them. "Excited for tonight?"

"Oh yes! Everything is set up. I’m so thrilled for tonight. I can’t believe it’s sold out on the first night already." The brown eyed young man looked at the stage with a big, bright smile before looking at Y/N again, "so everything is going good. Great even."

"Cool. Are we ready for the soundcheck? Can I go get my in-ear monitors in?" Hailee butted in the conversation and asked just as enthusiastically, eyeing the stage some more before focusing her attention back on her drummer.

"Oh yes! I have them already. Go get ready."

"M’kay, ready for soundcheck in 5 minutes, Mick."

"Okay!"

-

"Are you ready?" Hailee’s makeup artist asked in a soft voice as she applied the last touches of makeup on the singer backstage, Hailee nodding gently as she stared ahead of her after taking a deep breath, making the makeup artist smile warmly at her.

"I’m a bit nervous." Hailee admitted as she bit on her bottom lip anxiously, watching from her position in the backstage the lights on stage changing colors while the music in the background became louder and louder each passing second, signaling and warning her she only had about 10 seconds before going on stage, the beats of the drums reverberating through her ribcage, filling her up with adrenaline.

"You’re gonna do great." Y/N shouted over Hailee’s fans loud screams and smiled encouragingly at her, shocked to see a small grin directed back at her after the singer moved her focus from the stage to her, meeting her gaze briefly then returning her eyes back on stage, taking one last deep breath before running on stage, saying ‘hi’ to her fans that erupted in the loudest collective scream yet.

"Hello everybody! How are you?" Hailee laughed into the mic when her fans screamed louder and shook her head fondly before continuing, "I can see you’re doing great! Let’s get this show started, shall we?"

-

Y/N had to admit the concert was amazing. The fans were crazy for Hailee and Hailee put one hell of a show for them. Y/N had travelled a lot and she had seen a lot of concerts when she was a singer’s bodyguard and she had seen a lot of crazy fans, a lot of them were crazy, but she had never seen so much love being directed at a singer with that intensity, with so much warmth. It was endearing, truly. "WOHO! HOW WAS THAT?!"

"You did amazing. Congratulations."

Hailee turned around to stare back at Y/N, still not expecting her acting so nicely after treating her so poorly. "Thank you!"

Y/N smiled warmly at Hailee but the brown haired girl just reciprocated with a tight lipped smile before turning towards her dancers engulfing her in a big group hug, "hey, great show!"

Mick high-fived Y/N enthusiastically and giggled alongside her while bumping their shoulders together, watching as the dancers surrounding Hailee now started jumping up and down with her in the middle and screaming at the top of their lungs. "And it’s just the beginning."

"Do you think it will get crazier?" Y/N asked with an incredulous voice, watching Mick nod with widened eyes. "Really?!"

"Yes! Hailee’s fans are the best. They are so passionate about her! It’s amazing."

"I saw them during the concert. I still have to ‘encounter’ them in other occasions but I can see they are passionate." Y/N admitted as she watched Hailee interact with her dancers as she smiled widely, "I guess I will need to be extra careful, right?"

"Eh, not that much. They are respectful. Most of them at least. She had almost zero encounters with ‘batshit crazy’ fans."

"That’s good to know. I had a quite a few with that kind of fans and trust me, it’s not a pretty sight to witness."

"Oh I’m sure." Mick snorted under his breath before shaking his head softly, "but I’m sure it’s fun and exciting, am I right?"

"In some way yeah. But I guess when you need to protect your client, you are worried too. Even if there isn’t too much danger."

"Oh yeah, right." Mick seemed to ask something else, but he never got the chance because Jasmine, one of the dancers, came sauntering towards them with a big grin and interrupted them.

"GUYS! GET READY! WE’RE GOING TO PARTY!"

"What?" Y/N snorted when Mick asked that question with his eyebrows furrowed and a confused expression on his face.

"You heard me. We are going to celebrate the first concert of the tour!"

"You already planned everything, didn’t you?" Mick asked with a mischievous grin on his lips as he crossed his arms and looked at Jasmine knowingly.

"Well, yeah! C’mon, we’ve known each other for years!" Y/N watched as Mick chuckled with a small nod as Jasmine circled her arm around his shoulders and side-hugged him tightly.

"Fair enough. Anyway, I’m always in when there is alcohol involved."

"Y/N, are you in?" Jasmine asked with a smile, rolling a strand of hair around her index finger and looking at the Y/H/C girl expectantly.

"I kinda have to." Y/N replied with a snort, "you guys kinda have to be friends with me, because wherever Hailee goes, I go too. But I’m glad you invited me, so I don’t feel like I’m crushing on you guys’ night."

Mick and Jasmine laughed at her joke and both punched her shoulders as they shook their heads, "you sound like a jealous girlfriend."

Y/N snorted out loud at Mick’s joke before flipping him off, making him laugh harder alongside Jasmine. "C’mon you two, let’s get drunk!"

-

"I know! But at least I got free alcohol!" Jasmine laughed care-freely as she sipped on her drink, moving her head to the beat of the song playing in the club while eyeing her friends in the vip area dancing.

"We got free alcohol. Thank you Jaz!" Mick leaned over the table and high-fived Jasmine then doing the same with Y/N, who was only paying half attention to what they were saying as she tried to keep her gaze focused on Hailee dancing with a few of her dancers on the dance floor not too far from them. "Dude you now look like a jealous girlfriend. Chill. She is with us. She is safe."

"Stop harassing her Mick. She is doing her job." Jasmine leaned over the table to slap Mick’s shoulder before sitting back on her chair and patting Y/N’s hand gently, drawing her full attention. "Don’t listen to him Y/N."

"Oh trust me, I’m not. And I never will." Y/N joked with a mischievous smile directed at Mick, making him gasp with an offended face, his mouth opened in an O shape and his eyebrows drawn together, but she purposefully ignored him and focused her attention on Jasmine instead. "I just- I don’t want to be too oppressive. She doesn’t want me here. But her mom does. I want her to trust her mom is right. I am not her enemy. Nor are her fans. But sometimes things get crazy and I am here to protect her if it will ever happen."

"Don’t worry Y/N. She will come around eventually." Jasmine assured Y/N with a warm smile.

"Yeah, she will. I am sure of that." Mick caught Y/N’s attention by laying a hand on the Y/H/C girl and patting it gently.

"Thank you guys." Y/N smiled in appreciation at her friends, who just lifted their drinks and winked at her with small grins of their own.

"I need a drink." Y/N snorted under her breath when another dancer, Tess, walked at their table and sat unceremoniously down on the chair beside her, a bit sweaty and out of breath. "Can you go get me one Mick?"

"Sure. For 200 dollars."

"What?! C’mon! You came here to sit three songs ago! I need to rest." Tess argued as she groaned at Mick’s mischievous expression.

"Not my fault. You could’ve joined me then and you could’ve rested enough to get a drink." Mick countered back with mirth glowing in his eyes. Despite his words, Y/N saw Mick gripping the chair’s armrests, a clear sign he is ready to get up, and that gesture made Y/N smile fondly as she witnessed the drummer mess around a little bit with Tess.

"Ugh, you’re an asshole." Tess flipped him off before sending him a kiss when he got up from his chair right after. "Love you!"

"Yeah, yeah." Mick waved Tess off before walking towards the small group still dancing and talked to Luke and Mark quickly, before walking towards the VIP area’s bar. He probably asked his friends to get drinks for everyone and not too long after everyone joined the table when Mick, Luke and Mark brought shots and drinks. Everyone except Hailee. Y/N was ready to sit up and join her to keep an eye on her closely, but Tess passed her a shot and made her cheer with everyone else. Then another. When the third one arrived in a very short time, Y/N declined it since she was technically working and that made her senses go back on alert, chancing a look at Hailee, expecting her to dance with the few people dancing on the dance floor, but she was met with uncomfortable eyes that were clearly asking for help. With a lightning-fast movement she sat up from her chair and strode towards the dance floor.

"C’mon, let me buy you a drink babe."

"Do not call me babe. I said no. Thank you." Hailee talked slowly but with a firm voice, her tone a bit lower and full of anger and annoyance.

"Then let’s dance a bit before getting that drink. I promise I will make worth your while."

Y/N wanted to punch that douchebag’s face repeatedly when she heard the conversation going on as she got closer to Hailee and a small curly, dark brown haired boy, watching as he ogled Hailee with his brown eyes. "Is there a problem here?"

"No. Bye."

Y/N had to restrain herself when the boy answered before Hailee could, not even moving his eyes from her chest before meeting Hailee’s gaze with a disgusting flirty smile, "where were we? Oh yeah, we were about to dance. Or we could skip the dance and the drink and get right to the good part."

"Like a said no. A million times no."

"But-."

"You heard her. No." Y/N interrupted him as she crossed her arms under her chest and approached Hailee slightly, noticing how she leaned a bit over her as she tried to move away from the boy.

"Who are you?" Y/N had to physically restrain herself from punching repeatedly this douchebag’s smug face by closing her hands into tight fists, feeling her short nails sink deep into her palm and creating a grounding stinging, and by taking a deep, calming breath but it proved to be a really difficult task when the douchebag’s face twisted in disgust, "go find another girl to hit on, she is not interested."

Y/N’s patience was becoming thinner by the second and closed her eyes for a second to stop from head-butting hard this jerk, before opening her Y/E/C eyes again and focusing her cold gaze on him, "the only person I want to hit, hard, right now it’s you. Don’t test my patience. I’m here to tell you to go fuck yourself."

"Nice try, but I’m not going anywhere. Not without her at least." Hailee frowned in disgust when the boy winked at her in something that he may have considered seductive before focusing his gaze back on Y/N. "So why don’t you go bother someone else?"

"Did I stutter? Go. Fuck. Yourself."

"Listen-."

"No you listen for once. I said no. NO. A million times no. I guess you don’t take a no for an answer but I don’t care. I said no. I’m not going anywhere with you. And apologize to her since she had been nice enough to not beating the shit out of you."

"Oh I got it now. You two are together. It’s fine. We can arrange something." Y/N and Hailee facepalmed right away as they stared dumbly at him for a few seconds but they sighed loudly when they noticed he was actually serious.

"We’re not together. I am her friend."

Hailee was glad Y/N didn’t use the word ‘bodyguard’ since this jerk seemed to be so dense and dumb that he would’ve thought about some kinky role play shit he would’ve wanted to join. "We are her friends and we tell you to go nicely. Don’t let me repeat myself or the word ‘nicely’ won’t be used again."

Hailee turned her head around and smiled warmly at Jasmine and Mick behind her mimicking Y/N’s pose and watching the boy with a withering glare, "ugh fine, you bitch were too fucking haughty and snob to fuck."

The boy turned around with a scoff and went to walk away, but Y/N stopped him right after, "oh hey! You forgot something."

"What?" The boy didn’t have time to turn fully around before Y/N’s fist collided with his cheek hard and made him fall down on the floor with a grunt that almost got covered by the cheers and loud wolf whistles from her friends as they cheered Y/N on.

"There. Now you can go to hell asshole."

-

After about an hour, Y/N walked out of the club, following Hailee closely as she talked animatedly with two of her dancers about something Y/N wasn’t exactly paying attention to. "You don’t have to worry about that, we will blame Pete for that."

"Hey!" Y/N smiled softly at the boy in question protesting, lowering her head down and watching her feet move on the concrete for a few moments before looking up ahead again.

"Don’t worry, we won’t do that." Hailee was quick to reassure with a calming, comforting tone but her innocent expression then broke into a mischievous smile a second later, "maybe."

"I hate you two!" Pete put his hands on Hailee’s and Lorna’s shoulders, walking respectively on his left and on his right side, and pushed them to the side, making them stumble in their steps.

"That’s our stop. We’ll see you tomorrow. Goodnight Haiz." Lorna and Pete hugged Hailee tightly, doing the same with everyone that wasn’t on the bus they were staying in then walked in their bus.

"I’ll join you guys in a second. I will walk Hailee to her bus."

"Okay." Jasmine lifted her thumb up and nodded at her after she hugged Hailee goodnight and walked alongside her friends to their bus.

"Hm, I need to walk you back to your bus then I’ll leave you alone." Y/N told Hailee in an awkward stance and shrugged softly.

"Okay." Hailee nodded and started walking the few steps towards her tour bus, hearing Y/N catch up with her not even a second later.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah." Y/N didn’t believe Hailee not even for a second, she saw her bite on her bottom lip and fidget with her hands nervously since they left the club not too long ago, making Y/N ask if Hailee was okay.

"Are you sure? You seem a little bit- lost? Deep in thought. I just want to make sure you are okay."

"I am just a little bit shaken by what happened." Hailee finally admitted after a few seconds of silence, causing Y/N’s heart to clench at her quiet voice.

"I am so sorry." Y/N apologized with a regretful expression on her face and looked at Hailee with remorse clear in her Y/E/C eyes, "I shouldn’t have sat down at the table. I should’ve been right beside you so he wouldn’t have approached you in the first place." Y/N looked down at her feet for a few seconds in shame before looking back into Hailee’s brown irises when she felt them on her, finding nothing but fondness in those mesmerizing irises.

"Y/N, it’s not your fault. I actually really appreciated you giving me space and not staying glued to me all night long. I might not wanted and I might still not want you here since I don’t think getting a bodyguard was necessary but I understand my mother’s worries and I respect your job. And you did an amazing job. You came at the right time and helped me out and I’m grateful for that. Stop beating yourself up. You did nothing wrong."

"I know, but I should’ve arrived earlier. I should’ve stopped him before he could’ve approached you. I was distracted and I shouldn’t have been distracted. Not when I am working."

Hailee smiled tenderly at her before placing a hand on her right shoulder and caressed it softly in a comforting manner. "It’s okay. You need to have some fun too!"

"I don’t. Not when I’m working." Y/N countered back with her eyebrows furrowed and shook her head in denial, "my priority is your safety and I can’t protect you if I am distracted. It won’t happen again."

"Okay, stop. Hold on. Let me open the door and we can keep talking." Hailee rummaged in her purse to find the tour bus’ keys and opened the door, then signaled for Y/N to enter, but the girl shook her head and signaled her to go in first. Hailee rolled her eyes good-naturedly and shook her head with a small smile before she realized Y/N wasn’t going to give in and walked in first.

"Wow, what a mess!" Y/N said out loud and widened eyes comically as she took in the place, full of clothes scattered all over the living room’s floor and couches.

"Yeah sorry, I was trying to unpack a few things."

"All of this is a bit more than a few things." Y/N joked as she looked at Hailee comically and the girl shrugged shyly.

"Anyway, we started on a wrong foot. Especially because of me. Let’s start over. I will try to be more polite to you if you will try to have fun when needed."

"Oh I didn’t realize this was a negotiation." Y/N cracked another joke, smiling mischievously at Hailee while shaking her index finger to point at Hailee and herself, the singer scoffing with another good-naturedly roll of her eyes. "Anyway, I will try. But your safety has to come first."

"Deal."

-

"Ugh, Y/N relax. You don’t need to walk me back every night to my trailer, especially when it’s 10 feet away from the entrance!"

"I am sorry, but this is the protocol. It’s my job to be sure you are safe in your trailer."

"Yeah, okay, but no one is around. My fans are on the other side of the venue."

"I still will walk you back in your trailer." Hailee huffed out a small laugh as she fished her keys from her stage pants she stashed in there after grabbing them on the counter in her changing room before walking out of the venue and unlocked her tour bus door. "I-."

"Like every other night for the past month, no. You don’t need to check the bus. It was locked."

"Okay." Y/N sighed dejectedly, scratching her forehead in frustration at Hailee’s stubbornness as she looked the singer in her eyes, "you did great tonight by the way."

"Thank you." Hailee smiled widely at the compliment, adrenaline still pumping hard in her veins at how wonderful the concert was that night. The crowd was ecstatic and the atmosphere was amazing.

"Goodnight."

"Goodnight Y/N."

-

Y/N could hear Hailee’s name being screamed by the ecstatic crowd from the backstage and couldn’t help but smile at how passionate Hailee’s fans were and how much love they showed her, "okay, all set. You can go on stage now."

"What’s up everybody!" Y/N smiled widely when Hailee run up on stage and the whole crowd erupted in a loud scream of excitement at her sight, "wow, I see you are happy to see me!"

No matter how many times she saw it, Y/N was still stunned how much loved Hailee was by her fans. She had travelled a lot and she had been pretty famous singer’s bodyguard before, and even if Hailee’s fans weren’t that much compared to the singers’ fans Y/N had worked for, she could see the real passion, affection and love they had for Hailee. A lot of really famous singers have also a lot of ‘occasional’ fans in the crowd that are there at their concert just to watch them live, but with Hailee’s fans Y/N could see every single one of them would go to every single one of Hailee’s shows, they weren’t just occasional fans. "WOHO! WHAT A GREAT SHOW!"

"Fuck you Mick! You will make me go deaf one of these days."

"Nah, you’ll be just fine." Mick waved her off and snickered as he circled his arm around Y/N’s shoulders and hugged her closer for a moment before pulling away.

A few seconds later a body crashed into her back as it crawled over it, giving her just a few seconds to react and grab the person’s thighs to prevent them to fall on the ground, "Y/N! I missed you!"

"Jaz we saw each other 2 hours ago!"

"I know! But I still missed you!" Y/N smiled warmly at her friend as she hugged her tightly and shook her head before putting her down gently.

"Oh yeah! I’m gonna change quickly. I wanna say ‘hi’ to them." Y/N heard Hailee speak to her manager not too far from her and watched curiously as she run to the hallway that led to the dressing rooms, already knowing she was talking about going to say ‘hi’ to her fans waiting outside the arena. She followed her and waited patiently outside her dressing room as Hailee finished changing from her stage clothes and walked her to her fans when she finished, watching with fondness in her eyes Hailee talk to her fans, signing their pictures of her and taking selfies with them. It was calm for almost 10 minutes until a fight started not too far away from them, a few rows back, between a few Hailee’s fans. A few screams could be heard and Y/N, waiting patiently a few feet behind Hailee until then, immediately jumped into action and went to take Hailee away from the scene, since the arena’s guards already got it covered, but the singer walked forward to try to calm everyone down slipping from Y/N’s grasp. Y/N saw from the corner of her eyes as she walked again towards Hailee, a girl crashing into another girl holding a beer and accidentally breaking the bottle onto the barrier on her left, before another girl crashed onto her side and made her stumble forward, dangerously close to Hailee, as she walked a few steps forward to try to help and calm everyone down. "Guys, please let’s just-."

"Hailee!" Y/N got in front of Hailee’s just in time. The Y/H/C girl grabbed the singer’s forearm and pulled her behind her back as she got in front of her a second before the broken bottle got pushed into her lower stomach while the girl holding the bottle fell down on the floor right in front of Y/N’s feet. Y/N grunted in pain when she felt a big piece of glass embed in her skin and flesh, while the rest fell down on the floor and crashed into pieces, but the Y/H/C girl pushed the pain away to protect Hailee and moved her away from the hassle. "We need to go."

"Oh shit- Y/N!"

"We need to go now. I need to escort you away to a safe place."

"B-but we need to look at that-."

"I’ll be fine." Y/N gritted through her teeth as she ignored the excruciating pain and grunted out loud when she pushed Hailee towards the direction of her tour bus.

"Y/N we seriously need to call someone." Y/N grunted back in protest as she kept pushing Hailee towards the bus and signaled for her to open the door as she looked around for anymore treats. "Y/N, please. You’re bleeding."

"I will check it as soon as I am sure you are safe and now-." Y/N trailed off as she closed the door behind her and locked the door. "Now you are." Y/N sighed out loud as she laid her back on the closed door for just a moment before she pushed past the pain for a few more seconds to check the entire bus to be completely sure Hailee was safe.

"Okay, now please, stop here and let me check." Hailee leaned her hands on Y/N’s shoulders when she joined her back on the living area and pushed down gently to let her lay her butt on the small table behind her. "Oh fuck. It looks bad." Hailee stated, examining the big red spot on Y/N’s white t-shirt with a worried expression on her face.

"Can you- l-lift the shirt?"

"I don’t know." Y/N grunted in pain when Hailee just grazed the hem of Y/N’s shirt and stopped her movements right away.

"Fuck." Y/N hissed out loud and retracted her body abruptly from Hailee’s grasp, "sorry, just- be careful."

"I am." Hailee replied softly with a small smile, "I think we should let it be checked." Hailee repeated as she looked once again at the blood stained patch on Y/N’s white shirt, biting her bottom lip nervously. A few seconds later she felt the bus move and instinctively looked at the closed door separating the living area from the driving cabin at the front of the bus with her eyebrows furrowed together. "No, no, no! We should stop."

"No, it’s okay. It’s important that we get away from that chaos. We can handle it. Wait, let me rephrase that. I can handle it. I don’t want to bother you too much. I will go into the bathroom and as soon as we are far away I will go into my bus." Y/N announced as she lifted herself off the table with another pained grunt and limped a few steps towards the bathroom to check herself the damage that broken bottle did to her, but a gentle hand on her right bicep stopped her in her tracks.

"You can’t be serious Y/N. I will help you." Y/N smiled in appreciation at the soft tone Hailee used and nodded gently at her, who nodded back with a small grin of her own, "okay, now stay put. I don’t want to hurt you if you move."

"Yeah, okay." Y/N let herself be lead by Hailee back towards the table, making her sit back down on the table and slowly but more firmly this time, lifted Y/N’s t-shirt to assess Y/N’s injury, carefully slipping the shirt away from the glass before pulling it up under her chest.

"Oh shit." Y/N gasped out loud when she felt the cold air hit her hot skin and chanced a glance down her lower stomach.

"Oh shit." Y/N repeated Hailee’s words and stared at the big piece of green glass embedded into her skin. "Fuck."

"Sorry!" Hailee grimaced in apology as she tentatively grazed the piece of glass to assess the damage.

"Don’t worry." Y/N said through gritted teeth as she tried to subdue the stinging sensation in her lower stomach, "it has to be taken out."

"Wait- do you want me to-? No! No way." Hailee asked when she moved her eyes away from Y/N’s injury and found her Y/E/C eyes staring at her expectantly.

"Hailee please, we still need to drive for a bit more and I am starting to feel dizzy. So we need to take this out and stop me from bleeding out. I would have done it myself but I don’t have enough energy in me to pull it out neatly, I would cause more unnecessary damage. So please, I know I am asking too much, but you are my greatest option right now."

"Geez, talk about ‘no pressure’." Hailee joked and made Y/N chuckle airily under her breath as she smiled fondly at the singer.

"Yeah." Y/N shook her head and looked at Hailee amusedly, "sorry but it is what it is."

"No I got it." Y/N smiled fondly at Hailee and nodded once before letting her continue, "I just don’t want to screw it up. And I don’t want to hurt you."

"Don’t worry, you won’t. You will do great. I will guide you through it all."

"Why do I feel like it’s not your first time being this heavily injured?"

"Because it’s not. I liked to get into a lot of trouble in high school." Hailee smiled mischievously down at her but in her eyes Y/N could see worry and apprehension as she stared into her brown irises.

"Hm, why am I not surprised?" Y/N snorted under her breath and blushed slightly under Hailee’s gaze, "anyway, we should probably focus. I seriously need to take this shit out, you look a little pale."

"Yeah, yeah. It also hurts like a bitch. So we should hurry."

"Okay-." Hailee took a big, deep breath to ground herself and closed her eyes to focus, a few seconds passing before she opened them once again and with her index finger and thumb took a solid hold of the big, broken bottle’s piece. She stared at the glass a couple of seconds, took another deep breath then looked into Y/N’s eyes firmly, "on three. One, two, THREE!"

Y/N groaned out loud, trying not to scream too loudly at the searing pain in her abdomen and closed her eyes shut hard, "ow! Fuck, fuck, fucking shit!" Y/N felt dizzy and hold onto the table’s edge hard to prevent herself to fall on the ground. "Sorry for cursing. It won’t happen again." Y/N murmured quietly after she gained some consciousness, her head spinning slightly and feeling a little bit weak.

"Are you serious right now?" Hailee asked incredulously as she walked to the trash can and dumped the broken bottle’s piece into it and walked back to Y/N to assess her injury. "You were in pain. Hell, you are still in so much pain. There is no need to apologize."

"I know, but I’m still working right now, so I should try to at least be well behaved." Y/N tried to reason with seriousness but the small smile that Hailee sent her way broke her deep serious frown into a big grin of her own as they both chuckled under their breaths.

"I don’t care. You are not working right now. You are a friend that got hurt and I am taking care of you."

"I should consider myself lucky, shouldn’t I?"

"Oh yeah, very lucky actually!" Hailee replied with a serious face as she nodded once before breaking her serious façade with another grin, her hands still lifting Y/N’s shirt up some more to prevent the shirt’s fabric to stick onto Y/N’s deep cut on her lower abdomen, "I will take care of you really good, you’ll see!" Hailee winked playfully before looking down on Y/N’s cut to see if there was any small pieces of glass left that she didn’t take out earlier, luckily there weren’t. When she moved her eyes once again back on Y/N’s face she was met with a small blush on Y/N’s face and a big, mischievous and cheeky grin on her lips. "What?" When Y/N just kept staring at her knowingly, Hailee thought about what she had said and immediately blushed furiously as she fumbled over her words to try to clarify, "NOT LIKE THAT! Y/N!" Hailee slapped gently Y/N’s shoulder, who chuckled softly under her breath.

"Hey! You are the dirty-minded here, you should hit yourself! And I’m injured, I’m in a lot of pain right now, it’s not fair hitting me!" Y/N caressed her left shoulder where Hailee slapped her and chuckled under her breath at their banter.

"Not enough to stop you from being the only dirty-minded here!" Hailee countered back before lifting a challenging eyebrow up when Y/N opened her mouth to try to counter her back. She smirked triumphantly when Y/N shut her mouth and grunted out childishly.

"It’s not my fault, you said it like it was meant to be dirty!" Y/N replied a few moments later and pouted softly, trying to play her trump card and make Hailee relent and say she was the one dirty-minded between them, but it only blackmailed when Hailee smirked cheekily.

"Well, this only proves you are the dirty-minded here. Because even if I decided to specifically say those words with a dirty meaning, I covered it all up with an innocent look and I made it sound innocent. You were the one that caught the dirty meaning behind that phrase. But it wasn’t the case anyway, because I didn’t realize what I said only after you pointed them out, you horndog."

"Ugh, fine you won. Now please, tell me if I need stitches because I seriously need to disinfect the cut before it could get infected."

"Oh yeah! Wait-uhm- how do I know you don’t need stitches?" Hailee asked with an insecure voice, her eyes now back analyzing the cut intensely while her eyebrows were cutely furrowed together in concentration.

"Check the central portion of the cut. How distant are the two flaps of skin?"

"Hm, I think not too much. Maybe just a tad bit of a quarter of an inch."

"Okay, that’s a good thing. You don’t need to patch me up-." Y/N trailed off as she thought over what Hailee said while she tried to see the cut’s damage for herself too.

"Yeah- wait, hold the fuck up. I would’ve had to patch you up? Are you insane?" Hailee asked incredulously and stared at Y/N like she just grew two heads, who simply chuckled in amusement as she shook her head good-naturedly.

"No, I’m Y/N."

"I-hm." Hailee opened her mouth to prepare herself to counter Y/N’s words back, but as soon as her brain registered Y/N’s witty joke, she closed her mouth shut and looked at Y/N unamused. Y/N then chuckled softly under her breath and shook her head, but didn’t add anything else, wanting to hear what Hailee would counter back, excited for their new teasing and bickering dynamic. "Wow Y/N, that was really mature of you, I must admit. Very, very mature."

"What can I say? I’m a book full of surprises and plot twists." Y/N replied with nonchalance, shrugging and smiling innocently at Hailee.

"Unbelievable." Hailee shook her head good-naturedly and rolled her eyes in amusement as she walked to the cabinet where she knew there was the first aid kit and joined Y/N again. She place the bag beside Y/N and grabbed a cotton wool, soaked it with hydrogen peroxide and lifted it to Y/N’s cut. "Okay, this will hurt a little."

"OHW! OWH! OWH! FUCKFUCKSHIT!"

"Almost done, stay put!"

"I’m trying!"

"Not enough!" Y/N grunted at Hailee’s reprimand and tried to stay as still as the excruciating pain on the left side of her lower stomach allowed her to, closing her eyes shut as Hailee cleaned her cut. "Almost done."

"Finally, ugh it hurts so much, shit."

Hailee then stopped altogether when her eyes moved up from the cut just an fraction of second and got met with Y/N’s defined abs, every muscle standing out due to Y/N contracting them from the pain. "Uhm-." Hailee opened and closed her mouth like a damned dumb fish, slapping herself on the forehead in her mind for not getting a grip on herself at the sight of just defined abs and a well-defined body, her hand frozen on the cut.

"Hailee please, hurry- fuck! Ohw, ohw, ohw!"

"Oh, shit! Sorry!" Hailee apologized as she lifted the cotton wool from the ugly cut after she started pressing on it too much without notice in her distracted state and cursed herself under her breath for hurting Y/N more than necessary due to her being an- horndog? A stupid? "Here, done!"

"Uh, fucking finally. Okay, it is starting to subside." Y/N started to breath evenly back a few seconds later Hailee stopped mending her injury and relaxed her previously contracted abdomen when she could just feel a light and small stinging sensation from her lower stomach cut.

"We need to put an antiseptic cream on it otherwise it will get infected." Hailee pointed out as she walked towards the bathroom and opened her medicine cabinet, finding the aforementioned cream after rummaging a bit in the cabinet. "Wow, I need to thank my mom for thinking about everything. She packed a whole pharmacy in my medicine bag."

"A big thank you to Mama Steinfeld." Y/N breathed out as she nodded oxygen Hailee before chuckling softly under her breath with her as Hailee approached Y/N back and opened the bandages.

"Ugh, it looks ugly. Does it hurt a lot?"

"Not as much as before but it still hurts." Y/N explained with a shrug as she looked down at her injury too.

"Okay good. This will sting a bit but it will get it better." Y/N nodded and gritted her teeth to prepare herself for the stinging, flinching just a bit when Hailee’s delicate hand applied the antiseptic cream on Y/N’s cut with a cotton swab.

"Do you want me to blow on it just a bit?" Hailee did all her best to refrain her face to break into a big grin and tried to keep a serious face as she asked the question and it got even more difficult when Y/N looked down at her incredulously but she kept applying the cream not looking at Y/N, fearing she would crack and laugh out loud if she looked into Y/N’s incredulous eyes.

"How old do you think I am?"

"I don’t know, 5 years old?" Hailee then cracked as she looked at Y/N with her bottom lip trapped under her teeth to prevent her smile to broaden but as soon as she met Y/N’s eyes she bursted out laughing.

"Ha-ha very funny." Y/N rolled her eyes good-naturedly and snorted under her breath, her heart fluttering alongside her stomach at the cute laugh Hailee was emitting for her own joke.

"I know, I am hilarious."

"Debatable." Y/N countered back jokingly, "ohw, hey!"

"Sorry!" Hailee smiled apologetically but Y/N saw through that and rolled her eyes at her pushing on her cut at her mocking words.

"Thanks." Y/N breathed out gently as soon as Hailee stopped applying the antiseptic cream and smiled in appreciation for her care and patience.

"Okay, time to patch you up and we’re done!"

"Finally!" Y/N exclaimed out loud, amusing Hailee to no end as she wrapped the bandage around Y/N’s lower stomach. "Thank you."

"You’re welcome." Hailee smiled affectionately at Y/N after placing the other unused bandages back into the emergency kit and looked at her in gratitude, "I actually should be the one thanking you. Not the way around."

"I was just doing my job."

"You almost got hurt badly for it." Y/N shook her head with a soft smile and lifted her hand up in protest.

"It’s nothing. I’ve been worse injured." Y/N admitted with a mix of shyness and resolution, trying to make Hailee stop feeling bad for her.

PART 2

[rosyhoneydew]

I'll Cover You

Written for @bucktommypositivityweek | Week 2, Day 2: Scenes from a firetruck | cw for mentions of dissociation, flashbacks

I wrote two entries for today! If mildly steamy fluff is more your vibe it's here -> Stolen Moment

The winds are strong, even days after the tornado’s long gone.

Buck hadn’t seen anything like it before. Tornadoes, sure, but the kind of large-scale damage that came from an invasive cloud of bees droning en masse and descending on the city like a plague? A first. He’s nursing a sting or two himself for a few days.

It’s almost a relief to get called on scene two days later. Almost. Because while plane crashes are, at least, familiar, they’re still grueling.

All things considered, it’s not as bad as it could’ve been. The 737 went down on land this time, but it had only barely made it off the ground before taking a nosedive back onto the tarmac. The passengers were buckled in and the drop itself wasn’t too big. So yeah, they got pretty lucky.

They’re still on the scene now. Hen and Eddie are working at the cockpit last he knew, Chim’s somewhere in the med bay here with him, working on a bigger trauma. Buck’s been handling some of the lower grade injuries and he’s cool, really. Yeah it would be nice to be out there, doing the big boy stuff, but they’ve got a new captain and he’s learning to pick his battles.

He’s just finishing wrapping up a kid’s ankle. He can’t be more than 7 but he’s been so brave, holding his little sister’s hand to keep her from crying. He’s got the elastic bandage just in place when the wind rips the kid’s jacket from where it was draped on his shoulders and under the 217’s truck.

“I gotcha!” he reassures the kid quick. “One sec, you stay right here for me, okay?”

Buck shuffles over to the truck in a walk-run and bends down low to peek underneath. It would probably be easier to grab the jacket from the other side, but he’s already here so he just finishes ducking down, crawls under and reaches out for the corner of the fabric.

He’s still under the truck when the next big wind hits. It leaves the truck shaking and groaning around him. Buck freezes. It feels like all logical thought in his brain shuts off.

The truck isn’t going to tip over. He’s not stuck. If he had the presence of mind he could wiggle his toes, even. But there’s something about being under here, hearing the voices around him, it has him tense all over. He can’t move.

When he looks back on it, he’ll wonder why it set him off. It’s not nighttime, there are no kids with bombs strapped to them, it’s not like he was even under the truck when it tipped last time. It’s a fluke, almost. But it can’t be helped. He’s petrified.

—

Tommy honestly thought his first call working with the 118’s A-shift would have had a little more novelty, but it’s just been long. He’s happy to see Evan, of course, but he hardly sees him. He’s been over in the med bay for the last couple of hours that Tommy’s been teamed up with Viera, pulling passengers out of the wreck.

He had at least been able to drop off an older woman directly to Evan about an hour ago.

Well, Patricia, it looks like your day is looking up! You’re in good hands with this one. He’ll patch you up real good.

Ahh, my job’s the easy part. You’re just lucky firefighter pilot Kinard was here to save you.

She’d only had a sprained wrist, but Tommy had watched them from afar for a minute, ever impressed with the way Evan kept her calm, reassurances and jokes taking the fear out of her eyes. He has to turn back before long, but he lets that moment carry him through the next push. He’s going home to that man.

He’s jogging back to check in at base when he hears crying to his right. There’s a kid standing still, holding the hand of a little girl and he’s wailing at the sky. That doesn’t seem right. Tommy’s eyes track around the area and he spots boots sticking out of the side of their truck. Definitely not right. He changes course, picking up his speed as he approaches the kids.

“Hey, bud, you okay?” He’s got his hands on the boy’s shoulders, grounding him, hopefully. “You hurting anywhere?”

The kid coughs out a few more sobs in Tommy’s face, but he shakes his head. He looks like he’s willing himself not to be scared. Jesus, kids are resilient.

“Alright, that’s good, I’m going to check on my friend here, you gonna be okay for a minute?” A nod. Good.

Tommy turns his attention to the truck behind him, lays flat, knocking his helmet off in the process. The guy’s not moving, but Tommy’s not able to figure out at a glance what happened here. There’s no gas leak, no threat to public safety over here.

“You good, man?” he calls out.

The body of the guy twitches. Not dead. That’s good. He clears his throat.

“Can you feel your feet? I can try to move you but I need to know if you’ve got any injuries I should watch out for.”

No response. Okay. Time to change tack.

Tommy rights himself and walks to the other side of the truck, resuming position on the asphalt. He shuffles in a little closer and finally gets a look at the guy’s face.

Evan. It’s Evan.

“Evan?” he says. He’s not sure it comes out as much more than a breath.

Evan’s eyes do flick to his then, but there’s still something distant in his gaze. He’s dissociated. It comes to mind then, the stories told at happy hours and trivia nights, and the ones told only in the sanctuary that is their bedroom. They're good stories, but Tommy knows better than most the toll that kind of shit can take on a person. Evan's having a flashback.

“Alright, alright, baby,” Tommy says under his breath. He’s not sure Evan would hear him even if he spoke up. He looks pretty gone.

Tommy scoots half a foot closer, puts both palms flat to the ground.

“Evan,” he starts, “can you do this with your hands? Just like mine.” He flexes his hands a bit to demonstrate.

Evan’s own hands are balled up. It looks like he army crawled under here. His arms are bent at his sides, curled in tight half under his body. He blinks a few times.

“Your hands, Evan.” Tommy picks his own up and places them back down again. “Just like this.”

Evan mirrors the movements.

“Good job, that’s perfect.”

“Kinard?” He hears from behind him.

“We’re good here, Sloane.” Who knows if she’ll believe him; she’s a damn good secondary when they’re in the air but she’s nosy as all get-out.

He hears the sound of her turnouts rustling as she shifts around, deciding whether to stay or go.

“Sloane. I got this. Can you round back to the kids on the other side? I’m going to be here a minute.”

He hears the sound of boots squeaking behind him as she does what he asks. Okay, Ev, just you and me.

Evan’s fingertips are curling, his eyes pinched closed.

“Ev, sweetheart, look at me.” He does. “I’m gonna grab your arm okay? Then we can work on getting you over here. Sound good?”

There’s no response, but that’s okay. Tommy’s going real slow. He reaches out and places a sure hand on Evan’s arm.

“Can you push yourself toward me?”

His eyes close again and for a second Tommy falters, mentally jumping two steps back to figure out a different path forward. But then Evan pushes. He digs the meat of his hand into the ground and uses the leverage to slide his body toward Tommy.

“Just like that. Exactly like that.”

He’s close enough now that Tommy can reach his shoulder. He gets a good grip and rolls Evan the rest of the way, pulling him up to sitting once he’s on his back and out from under the belly of the truck. He watches as Evan scrambles to pull his feet out.

Tommy’s got him sat in between the V of his legs, one arm around his waist, and brings the other up to Evan’s face, pushing the damp hair off his forehead. They’re tucked in between trucks, so the sound of commotion from the continued efforts of the other houses is muffled. The loudest thing he can hear is their panting, both going a little boneless with relief.

Tommy places a kiss to Evan’s temple. He’s sweaty there too. He feels Evan’s breathing slow down a bit, but he’s reluctant to break the quiet. He’s not sure that Evan’s flashbacks are like his, everyone’s a little different, but he sometimes needs the silence after. Just to collect himself. So he gives that to Evan, too.

“Did- did you get it?” Evan finally says, startling Tommy just a bit.

“Get it?”

“The jacket.” He’s smoothing his palms over his pants; nervous habit.

Tommy stretches his neck to look behind him, sees the blue rain jacket lying there. He can pinch it with his fingers from where they’re sitting. He drags it out. Troublemaker.

They sit together for another minute. Tommy can hear Sloane marching the kids away to find their parents. If he really tunes into the noises around them, he can hear some laughter and lots of walkies; they're finishing up here. He'll probably get called in soon enough to pack up.

“How are you feeling?” he asks.

Evan nods, then tips his head back onto Tommy’s shoulder. “Better. Thank you.”

Tommy moves his hand down to Evan’s face, just to tilt his cheek a little closer, plants a long, sure kiss there.

“I’ve got you.”

Evan smiles. “Yeah, you got me.”

[dawnoftime22]

make it okay.

| W.M -> N.R

Undeserving of a Love Like Yours, Chapter 6

Chapter Warnings: Some subjects that you can kind of count as sensitive? Not getting enough sleep, Overthinking, Mental exhaustion, cheating, sad wanda and...I think, that's it. (please tell me if I'm missing any!)

Summary: With having finished a breakup with a cheating brunette, you go to visit Kate in New York, needing a best friend to keep you company in these trying times of yours.

Series Summary: When you're stuck in a complete hole of confusion and hurt with the one you thought you loved most, a certain redhead finds her way into your life.

Word Count: 5.1k

Category: Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Angst

A/N: I'm veeeeery tired. very. need a hug. past few days was just :( also this chapter is mostly just kate giving comfort. sorry if I wrote her in a way thats off from her? I rarely write her character, but it was definitely fun, along with lucky. enjoy :]

Series Playlist

| Started on 05/03/2024, 3:49 PM |

| Finished on 18/03/2034, 6:53 PM |

Masterlist | Series Masterlist | N.R Masterlist

<- Chapter 5 Chapter 7 ->

"Having a soft and kind heart is a dangerous way of staying alive, sure. But I don't understand being cold and cruel when most of the world already is."

|——————————— ➳ ———————————|

After getting off the phone with Kate, you clicked on your seatbelt and put the car on drive, off to get out the side road. Before you do, you took one last look at the café and the flower shop. All that time spent, and for what, exactly?

You sigh. The wheel turns with your hand and you continue on driving, starting your journey to the airport. It wasn't a perfect day. Well, obviously, but the weather isn't perfect either. The sun shone down on you, burning up everything in its view outside while you pulled down the sun visor and turned the ac up.

It's hard not to get lost in thought as you made your way to the airport, your mind walking back to every memory, and every question you have unanswered. Is this how you're always gonna feel? Maybe so. Maybe not. But what were you supposed to do about it?

Nearly every scenery of this town that once had your heart beating of affection now doesn't even make it pulse at all. It stings, even dead, like the flower that was around it, grew thorns. You take a deep breath, trying to focus on the road.

Being in the love blackout already had you overthinking every little thing and wondering what exactly you've done wrong for Wanda to act so different, but it wasn't really you. It was her. Though, even with finding out about the new information, it didn't make things better. Of course, only worse.

Was it something you didn't do? Was it something you did? Or perhaps just a simple fall out of love. You should've known. Should've seen the signs. You didn't even want to think about it, but you can't help it. Did she leave her house in the middle of the night only for you to welcome her home? Did she gift someone else something while you got her flowers? Was she kissing another's lips while you sat there in the corner of the café, waiting for her?

You hear your phone making noise with notifications, one after another. You know it's Wanda, and your fingers twitch to reach out and grab it, but you don't pick up. Instead, you quickly put your hand out to silence your phone. If you didn't, or if you took any action that was opposite of that, you'd have turned the car around already.

You notice your vision getting blurry with tears, but you blink them away, needing to focus on the road ahead. You sigh when you stop at a red light, having time to wipe your eyes with your hands. The frustration only fueled your way forwards.

Getting drunk on New Year's Day, that was all just a ruse. Who knows if that wine was even hers that she bought. Maybe it was given by another. You would rest your head on your steering wheel by now in utter exhaustion and willingness to surrender to the unavoiding pit of pure darkness if you didn't have to keep your eyes on the road.

Another thought that distracted you from everything, was if you should call Carol. She'd probably wonder where you've gone and worry. But you decided you'll call her later.

An hour or two passes by and eventually the wheels of your car rolls up to the front entrance of the airport, the scattered crowds of people carrying luggages and trolleys making it a stark contrast from crowds outside of the airport.

Your eyes don't linger for too long, but your ears undeniably catch the PA announcer speaking, although New York was only mentioned once and it wasn't your flight. You continue on driving, getting through the many other cars sitting at the pickup site to go down to the basement, where the parking lot is.

It was packed, but not entirely. Passing by, you see shiny fresh cars, normal looking cars, and old dusty abandoned ones left by someone for some type of reason. You hoped your car doesn't end up like that, but you had no reason to let it sit in a parking lot for years. Soon, you found a small empty corner to slot your car into, easily going in.

The engine shuts down with the touch of your fingers and you get out, grabbing your bags and going over to the two-door entrance where the elevator was. Some people were there, but you try your best to simply stand and wait. Lucky you went in right as the elevator was about to arrive to the floor.

The airport lights were bright and blinding when the elevator doors open, making you squint your eyes and blink, but also remembering to step out and go over to the register section, grabbing your ticket.

Seeing as you got here early, your flight wasn't until an hour later, so you decide to roam the airport to get some breakfast first. Outside held plenty of restaurants and cafés though, so you went there.

You grabbed some breakfast from a café that caught your eyes, and sat down at the bench outside. It was pretty empty here, since most people were either at the entrance or the other side of the airport-- there, holding the more popular restaurants.

You were just about to grab your meal and take a bite after getting some liquid in your body when you feel a drop of water land on the skin of your hand.

Confused, your eyebrows furrowed as you look closer at it, the water rolling down your hand when you tilted it. You looked around to find nothing. Then the skies started to grow darker, the sun getting covered up by the clouds.

The rain came pouring down quickly after building up, making everyone else scramble to the entrance of the airport, it having a roof.

Meanwhile, a stranger somewhere at the parking lots was just stepping out their car when the rain came down. They go back in urgently, but only to grab an umbrella.

You were standing up from the bench and covering your head with your arms, about to do the same as most of the other people were doing. Running to shelter. Then, suddenly the raindrops on you stop.

Feeling the rain disappear, you slowly put down your arms and see a redhead beside you, holding an umbrella above the two of you to shield from the rain.

She didn't look at you for long, having turned her head to the airport entrance. Not wanting to get left behind, although you were sure you won't considering she had put the umbrella over you, you still quickly walk with her.

"Thank you," you say, chuckling a little as the coolness of the airport hits you combined with the rain drops on you, sending a shiver down your spine. You shove your hands in your pockets as she closes the umbrella.

"Of course." She said gently, her voice husky as she nods. Afterwards, nothing much happened. She had walked away, nearly in a hurry with her eyes focused on the big flight screen in the middle of the airport, but it wasn't entirely obvious unless you were staring closely at her. You guessed she was either late for her flight or was just trying to get to her area fast. A kind encounter with a stranger...at least there's one good thing for today.

You check the screen yourself, and your eyes searched for your own journey. When you didn't find it, you searched more panickly, until you restart from the top and it pops up. But it wasn't in its original place. Then, you go off to the side and see a bright red text gleaming with the word, 'DELAYED'.

Great. Now you have to wait longer. A bad thing right after the good thing. You sigh, but make your way to the sitting area anyway, going through security with ease.

Once you've gone to the section your plane would arrive...in a few hours. You sat down, sliding your phone out from your pocket and pulling up your direct messages with Kate, telling her you'll be late because of your flight.

After an hour passed of you being bored, scrolling on your phone and opening an app only to close it, mixed with overthinking while resting your head on your folded arms, a message finally pops up, and your fingers quickly tap on it.

Kate replied back with some film recommendations and videos of Lucky doing tricks and getting excited at the mention of your name, making you smile.

You guessed she was driving when you messaged her, but you didn't mind it, and watch the things she sent you.

It keeps you occupied for a long while, up until you forgot about time, but the sound of your plane arriving quickly reminded you.

You look up to the large windows at the side that showed the huge parking area of the airplanes. There were small cars along with someone holding red sticks to direct the plane.

Many eyes in the large room was watching everything go by, the vehicle holding all the passenger luggages, the people from that flight getting out. You guessed they were clearing it out and starting to clean up.

The other eyes in the room weren't even looking at all, focused on their phones, laptops, or simply their eyelids were closed in sleep. Most of them had probably been in an airport plenty of times to not be mesmerized by the movements and sound. Or doing work...or is simply tired.

You had enough time to finish up your movie before your plane was ready to board, making you gather your things and stand up, having finished your breakfast hours ago.

It didn't take much time to get in, easily going through the little portable hallway connected to the plane and letting the attendant check your ticket.

After finding your seat, you store your things in the compartment above, then settle down, buckling in the seatbelt. The seat beside you was empty up until a few minutes later, someone sitting in it. They did the same movements as you, but rather than watching the view out the window, they bring out a book, placing it in their lap as the plane started moving, having made sure everyone settled down and was seated.

You put on some music on your earphones and got ready for the journey ahead. It was only two hours to New York from where you were, but still you hoped it'll feel short. Maybe you'll get some sleep on the way.

|——————————— ➳ ———————————|

The plane soon landed once more, the turbulance actually smoother than most of the other ones you've gone through. The person beside you on the other hand, put the book they were reading down and grabbed onto their armchair.

You didn't pay much attention to it, more mesmerized by the tall buildings you can already see in the distance. You've been here plenty of times before to visit Kate, but the view was still stunning.

After the plane settled in its parking spot completely, you unbuckle your seatbelt and get up, just as everyone else, grabbing your bag and walking out.

A text to Kate was sent of your arrival. The walk felt longer than the flight as you made your way through security and up to the pickup site, where she was already waiting, your eyes quickly catching the familiar sight of the car and license plate.

You load the empty trunk of the car with your bags, then walk back to the front. The door opens with the pull of your hand, inside revealing the raven haired girl looking over to you with a gentle smile as you went in.

"Hey," She greeted, her voice soft and lightly pitched as she started moving the car out the side, both to get you two home and let the other cars pick someone else up.

"Hi. Sorry for being late," You say as you set your handheld bag down, buckling in your seatbelt as Kate's eyes flicker to you for a moment before focusing on the road again.

"Don't worry. It was pouring here." She goes to make a turn, getting out of the airport area and into the main road.

"I'm just glad you're safe," She says. A smile tugs up on the corners of your lips, your heart warming. Kate was always a caring, lighthearted and comforting person. No wonder you've been feeling so low...other than for obvious reasons. Calls and messages are never enough to capture the blanket feeling of being beside someone like that.

On the way, Kate asks a few questions and jokes here and there, catching up with you. There was a conversation needed to be talked about for sure, but she knows to save it for later, when you get more comfortable.

The rest of the journey to Kate's place was quiet, the silence only filled with the humming of the car and the music she put on. Your eyes watch the modern city buildings pass by. The sidewalks and roads were shining with the sheen of water, the rain having met it earlier.

It was only 4 pm, but you had a sort of sleepiness creeping up on you, perhaps from the mental, emotional and physical exhaustion mixed together. Kate notices, seeing how your eyes were too relaxed to count as just being calm. But she doesn't say anything, knowing you still wouldn't be able to fall asleep.

The car comes to a stop, making you snap out of being zoned out. Kate was gathering her things and turning off the engine of the car, moving to get out. Then you realize you had arrived at her apartment.

Your eyes go over the building as you got out the car, slamming the door closed...accidentally. Your eyes widen slightly and you grimace, looking at Kate, who had her mouth open in an O shape.

"Someone's really angry," she jokes, grabbing a plastic bag from the backseat. You gave a tight-lipped smile and went to the back of the car.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to," you quickly spew out your apology. The first hour you were with your best friend again, and you slam her car door. You grabbed your bags that were safely sitting in the trunk as she made her way to you.

"It's alright," she laughs, stepping in front of you while you slung your backpack over your shoulder. She held out a pack of dog treats to you while her other hand still held the plastic bag of groceries.

"Here." She puts out her hand further when you didn't take it, thinking you hadn't noticed. Then you look down and see what it is, your eyebrows furrowing in thought within your dazed mind.

You gasp when you realize it. "I get to feed Lucky?" You ask, your face brightening as you look back up at her. She nods, a smile on her face. You quietly cheer as she made her way to her apartment, her keys rattling in her hand as you followed behind her.

The door opens with a click, and instantly, you hear the sounds of a gentle bark and running coming from Lucky, having arrived at the front door quickly to meet the two of you.

"Hey, buddy." Kate holds the door with her body, leaning down slightly to card her fingers through Lucky's fur.

"Look. Look, it's Y/N." She points to you, making the golden dog run to you, jumping as he went. You smile and kneel down, greeting him as he started licking your face. Kate watches the excitement of Lucky from the door, a fond gaze on the two of you.

"Okay, okay. I've missed you, too. Let's get inside now," you manage to say in between laughs, standing up. You went in with Lucky staring up at the pack of treats in your hand, lightly pawing at it with his tongue sticking out his mouth.

"Wait, I need to put my stuff down first." You pull back the pack of dog treats away from him while Kate closes the door. You can see the impatience he tried to cover with a look of calmness, but you know he would jump on you if he needed to get the treats.

You kick off your shoes and set down your bags in the bedroom you usually sit in whenever you visit Kate, Lucky following you around and circling playfully around you at times.

"He's really missed you," Kate says with a laugh, putting her grocery bag on the kitchen counter to unload and store the contents into her fridge and cabinets.

"I can see that," you say quietly, focused on opening the bags and putting food in his food bowl. Before setting it down on the floor though, you hand feed him a treat, patting his head with your other hand gently as he instantly ate it.

"As much as I would love to play around with him though, I should probably go change and shower." You say, having set down Lucky's food bowl, giving him one last longing pat and standing back up.

"Do you wanna watch a movie when you're done?" Kate asks, turning to look at you as she got done storing everything.

"Yeah...I probably need it anyway. You can choose." You say with a nod, and Kate watches you go to your bedroom, off to get yourself cleaned up, unpack, and unwind. She knew exactly what you were saying, and her heart ached just a little at the mere thought of your troubled mind.

You close the door behind you, taking a deep breath in once you were inside, letting it out as a heavy sigh after, walking to your bags to slide the zipper open.

Everything seemed to hit you all at once, your shoulders feeling heavy as it moves along with your hand to grab your clothes. You go to the bathroom, fatigue within your movements as you close the door, pull off your clothes, and turn on the shower.

The warm water running down your skin welcomes you, letting you relax a bit and your muscles letting go of its tensions. The steam filling up a bit of your breathing from the shower makes your body feel comforted, the barely noticeable movement of it going to everything that was glass in the bathroom, fogging it up.

A gentle yawn leaves your mouth, finally feeling the exhaustion take you over. But you still had some energy within you, so you willed yourself to clean yourself up and wash your hair, then turning off the shower once you were done.

You dry yourself off, then put on your clothes. When you were about to go walk out the bathroom though, you had a thought and turn on the sink for a quick second, splashing your face with cold water before drying your face with your towel once more. Now you were a little more awake.

You get out of the bathroom, parts of your hair dripping slightly. Since you already had your clothes on, you decide to unpack everything else, storing your shirts and pants in the closet.

Your eyes flicker to the bed, and the urge to fall into it was strong, but you hold yourself back. If you went into bed by now, you knew you probably wouldn't be able to get up anytime soon.

Once you've dealt with unpacking, you put your bags off somewhere in a corner of the room and move to the door, getting out the bedroom. Out in the living room, you see Kate, already sat down on the couch with a movie set up on the tv. She notices you and looks up.

"Hey. I made us some fries and nuggets." She gestures her hand towards the plates of fries and nuggets accompanied with sauce, making the smallest smile cross your face.

You sit down next to her, grabbing a few and taking a bite, the crunch sounding out as she looked at you eating, resisting a smile when you hummed in delight.

You shift your position on the couch, getting comfortable while Lucky jumped up, laying beside you, only to then move to lay on both of your lap and Kate's, but his head was on your side, making her shake her head at her dog's antics.

Your eyes focus on the screen when Kate hits play, one of your hands patting Lucky's head and traveling down to his body fur while the other one grabs the chicken nuggets and fries.

Kate gently pokes your shoulder multiple times, making you turn to look at her. She had fries in between her teeth and mouth, sauce sitting on the end of it for extra effect of blood, looking like a vampire's fangs. Instantly, you giggle, to which turn to laughs when one of the fries fell, leaving only one in her mouth.

She laughs herself, and quickly go to retrieve the fallen french fry. Although, right as her fingers held it, Lucky had moved and turned to her side, chomping on the fry. Kate grabs the fry in her mouth, eating that before he could try to steal it from her too.

"Hey! That's not yours." She exclaimed, but Lucky only looked at her innocently, licking her face for a moment, probably asking for more. She laughed, but gently push him away, needing to see the tv too.

"You're lucky you're cute." She shakes her head when Lucky had stopped, and settled down in your laps again.

"He's not just Pizza Dog anymore." You start, and she turns her head to look at you, the both of you having something in your heads.

"French Fry Dog," you say simultaneously, the sound of your voices mixing together along with your soft laughs afterwards. Lucky only tilts his head, confused of the sudden sounds from the two of you.

You focus back on the movie, getting invested in the story. The nuggets and fries were slowly going down to an empty plate, counted as snacks for the movie, but still filling up your stomach. The day had transitioned into nighttime now, time going by quickly.

When Lucky moved to settle beside Kate instead, probably needing a new position just as you did, you move to lay down, your head on the armrest and your arm dangling off the couch. At some times of the movie, you space out, your mind occupied with thoughts.

Kate's eyes were completely on the tv, comfortable and fully focused on the story. Your eyes flicker over to her for a split second before returning to the screen, your teeth sinking into your bottom lip.

"Kate?" You whisper, barely even within the sound volume of a breath. She hums and looks over to you, your body seeming weak against the couch. Lucky was now sleeping beside her.

"What if it doesn't get better?" Your eyes travel down to the floor, not meeting her eyes. Her eyebrows furrow at the suddenness of your sentence, and she sits up more properly.

Having felt the change in your demeanor, Kate quickly pauses the movie, putting all her attention on you. "Don't say that," She counters in a gentle tone.

"You'll get through it. You always have," She says, her voice a soothing sound through the night air. The crickets make noise in the background, having replaced the sounds of the movie now that it was paused.

"Do you think it was me?" You whisper, sitting up because your cheek was starting to get sore from resting against the armrest. You fiddle with your fingers and look at her as Kate quickly shakes her head.

"No. You've stayed through it with her in the worst of times and the best." She takes in how you fiddled with your fingers, a hint to your dark mind. A small gentle, although bit of a sad smile goes over her face as she thought of the softness of your heart.

"Everyone has their mistakes but after all this time I've known you, I think you have been so brave and just...such an amazing person." She says, knowing the many gestures of gifts and time and reassurances you've done before, both to strangers and people you know.

"The point is..." She takes a breath, trying to find the right words to say. She wanted to tread carefully, not wanting to accidentally say something wrong. You watch as she thinks, her words sinking into your mind.

"Don't blame yourself," She finally says, looking directly into your eyes to make sure you heard her completely and isn't lost in your head as she said it.

"The love was there, but you reached the end of it," she points out, unfaltering in her honesty, but her voice was gentle. The truth was, it was doomed from the start. You had it in the back of your head all the time. But there seemed to be such a high chance of it coming out alive from the beginning. Yet, all that was a simple trick your minds put on.

"But why did she...do that?" You ask hesitantly, your heart pained with cracks. You knew people did the things they wanted to, with a reason or not. But this was different. Kate purses her lips, a sigh leaving her mouth.

"Honestly, I'm not who you should be asking..." Kate says with a soft chuckle, a tinge of the sound having a nervous tone, but she needed to help you get out than dig yourself deeper.

"But maybe she didn't want to hurt you," She says with a gentle shrug. Her mind worried it was a bad thing to put out, but she sees your shoulders slumping in defeat.

"...But it did anyway." You sigh. It'll always hurt. Whether you'd like to admit it or not, no matter the ways its done in. She had nothing to say to that.

The two of you sit in quiet silence for a minute, needing the break to think. Lucky shifted slightly in his sleep, and Kate gently puts her fingers through his fur before looking at you once more, seeing your gaze lost in a haze of your thoughts.

"Now, come here." She lets go of Lucky and slowly pushes herself off the couch with her hands, standing up and turning to you. You raise your eyebrows at her, curious of her next moves.

"You're desperately in need of...a teddy bear hug!" She gently tugs on your arm, pulling you up to stand.

"Aw, no!" You joked with a chuckle as you get pulled into her embrace, her arms squeezing you tightly as if you were simply a plushie.

You hug her back though, relishing in the tight yet comforting embrace of her arms. Your body relaxed, feeling the weight on your shoulders slowly disappearing just slightly.

"Thank you." You say under your breath, pulling away from her. She slides her hands into her pockets, giving you a reassuring smile.

"It's what I'm here for." She said quietly with a nod, her eyes traveling over to the clock. Her mind jumps to the memory where you seemed sleepy, right in the car earlier.

"You should get some rest. Have you slept at all ever since you went to the airport?" She asks, nudging your shoulder with her knuckles. A faint thought of you in your worst times went through her mind just for a moment.

"No...but--" You look over to the tv screen, seeing you had just a quarter left to finish of the movie.

"Go," Kate says gently yet slightly sternly in a whisper, cutting you off. Lucky was already sleeping. She was still energized, but she could go to sleep at any time at the moment. Kate was just more concerned about you, hating to see you avoid taking care of yourself.

You look at her for a moment longer, your eyes flicking over to Lucky to think it over before giving in, your head moving in a gentle nod.

She gives you an encouraging smile, letting you go to your bedroom. As you did so, she started cleaning up, getting the plates from earlier and putting them in the sink. When she hears your bedroom door close, was when she could have her heart get just a tad lighter.

You make your way to your bed and turn the dim lights on, falling into bed easily. A sigh leaves your mouth, and you wanted to spill out your feelings, but all that was more on your mind was sleep.

The mattress was soft, and you wanted to sink into it, yet still, your head falls asleep after minutes of tossing and turning while the night delved deeper into a form of comfort.

|——————————— ᗢ ———————————|

Wanda, on the other hand, hasn't been sleeping at all. She kept thinking over the memories of the past few months. It was like a contest of who can act like they can care less. At first. Then, she saw your efforts and got guilty, wanting to isolate herself instead.

The day you were waiting at the café. She was going to actually have lunch with you. But the person she was with had convinced her to stay. Her heart screamed no, but her mind was far from it. She was already falling out of love with you, so what could it hurt?

It seemed like the right thing at the time for her, and it was easier for her to put the blame on herself than making you overthink about the smallest things and make yourself the villain instead. She didn't want to hurt you. Your heart was the softest she's seen. But she only ended up hurting you further. It was a situation that only had loss.

Then, the birthday was an actual mistake.

She thought it'd be nice to get a day off to herself...and with another, hoping you'll still believe that she was at work, although the both of you had doubted it by that point already. But she actually forgot.

Your past, she knows. How many people you've drifted off from and never really got one to stay or even stayed yourself. Then you met her, who was struggling to believe how anyone could love her. And you decided to stay. For once, you poured your whole heart into it because you promised yourself not to run anymore. For once, she had someone in her life that truly cared for her.

And she did that.

Her legs curl further into her body, the bed being colder than the nights before. Was this what you felt whenever you slept alone and she was off doing whatever?

Her chest caves in and her heart gives up, the walls whispering back to her of her quiet cries.

end of chapter 6. <3

Series Masterlist <- Chapter 5 Chapter 7 ->

----------------

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[justtwotired]

Hello ! I hope you’re doing well. I was wondering if I could get an ask for Sam and Colby. Maybe reader (female or gn neutral pronouns are fine !) is invited to go with SnC exploring an abandoned place but she’s been struggling with body image (I’m kind of in the slumps rn :/) so she’s cut back on food. Through the trip they notice her lagging behind and getting tired easily. She ends up fainting due to exhaustion and lack of food and they take care of her when she comes to. Preferably Colby pairing and lots of angst ! Only if your comfortable writing about this thank you xx 🫶🏽

Why hello there, I am so sorry for posting this rather late, I wrote a part of it, then got busy and forgot about it and just finished and edited it, so hope it’s alright!

I really like this request! Mostly because I can really relate to reader, this is always chill because then I can write five that actually make sense ya know.

I did write some angst but not LOTS, because angst is one of those things I still find difficult to write, but I hope you still like it<3

“What’s up guys it’s Sam and Colby!” Colby started. “Today, we are at an abandoned manor in the woods right behind us. It is quite a walk, but I think we will survive!” Sam told the camera.

“Also, we brought someone with us,” Sam then pointed behind him where I stood rather awkwardly, wearing a huge hoody that I may or may not have stolen from Colby’s closet.

“This is Y/n, you guys know her of course, we had lots of questions to bring her back to the Chanel, so we did of course.” Sam explained before turning the camera fully on me.

I sucked in an unnoticeable sharp breath. Did I look alright? Was that pimple I hid under makeup this morning still invisible? Did the hoody hide my body enough?

“So, N/n, are you excited?” Sam asked and I gave the camera a genuine smile. “I am actually, this place is not too far from my home town and I’ve been wanting to go here for a while, but I didn’t want to go alone, so now I have these two idiots to come along.” I joked and Sam pointed the camera at Colby.

“Did you hear that, dude?” He said in fake sadness. “I thought you where coming with us?” Colby said also jokingly hurt. “I’m still stuck on the fact she called us idiots.” Sam said and pointed the camera at himself.

“Seems like we have to change the channel name to ‘Y/n only’ because she is taking over.” He said and I chuckled. “Oh yeah, definitely, and I’ll give them weekly uploads instead of your monthly shit.” I said and Colby grinned.

“What you’re going to the conjuring then? Staying a week there?” He asked and I pursed my lips. “Well I didn’t say that.”

The two laughed and Sam shut off the camera. “Heading to the forest, then?” He asked and we nodded. Suddenly my stomach made a growling noice and they stopped.

“We could get something to eat first?” Colby suggested and I shook my head. “Nahh, it’s fine, I’m not that hungry really,” I waved it off and kept walking.

“Are you sure? You haven’t eaten breakfast yet and it’s almost two in the afternoon,” Colby said and I just chuckled.

“I’m fine, really,” I smiled at him and kept walking, not missing the look the two of them exchanged before following me.

Truth to be told, the last time I ate would be the crackers from the day before, as I had just a bit in the afternoon after almost passing out.

Colby walked in the back, having taken over the camera from Sam and he recorded as we entered the forest.

I knew the walk would be about 20 minutes, so it wasn’t that bad, but I felt myself stress out when I became light headed.

Oh no, please, please not now.

Passing out has become normal now, the lack of food I’ve been consuming has been taking a toll on me. I never tell anyone, it’s my little secret, I didn’t need them to worry about me or feed me lies of how I was ‘beautiful’ because I know I’m not.

I stumbled and almost fell but steadied myself. “You alright there?” Sam turned around with a small grin and I gave him one back. “I’m fine,” I lied and we kept on walking, Cole shutting the camera off.

When the building came in sight he started it up again, and of course, as if fate had planned it, I fell and I noticed my consciousness slip away.

The last thing I felt was two arms around my waist and I was out.

I heard someone calling my name from afar and my eyes slowly opened.

“Oh, thank god, Sam! Sam she’s opened her eyes!” Colby called out. I slowly sat up. I was laying in the grass and I noticed Sam jogging over with his phone in his hands.

“Are you alright?” I looked at Colby who had a concerned look on his face and I nodded, trying to stand up but he put his hands on my shoulders.

“Woah, lets keep sitting down for a minute, love,” he said and I sat, rubbing my head. “How long was I out for?” I asked and Colby looked at his watch.

“Five minutes at least.” He told me. “Yeah, I tried calling for help, but there’s no service,” Sam said and I gave him a weirded out look.

“What help did you try to call?” I asked and he shrugged sheepishly. “Your mum, I thought maybe this had happened before,” he said and I sniffed.

“It happened a few times, but my mum doesn’t know, and don’t even think of telling her,” I said and the exchanged glances.

“You know what’s happening then?” Colby asked and I sighed. “I haven’t eaten in a moment, that’s probably it.” I confessed and Colby sighed.

“I told you that you should it this morning- when is the last time you ate?” He questioned. “Uhh, yesterday, some crackers,” I said and he clenched his teeth slightly.

“A decent meal,” he clarified and I bit my lip thinking back. “Tuesday, I think?” I said a bit uncertain. “That’s five days ago, Y/n!” He scolded and pursed my lips.

“Sorry,” I said in a small voice. Sam got his backpack of his shoulders and started to rummage trough it, pulling out an apple.

“Eat this,” he said and I took it from him, frowning at it a bit. “N/n,” he said and I sighed taking bite.

They made me sit for about ten minutes, and demanded I tell them why I wasn’t eating. With a bit of reluctance, I told them about how I felt, how I hated how I looked and that I felt like I was to fat.

The next twenty minutes where spent with them telling me all the things they liked about my look and my personality, giving me reasons to eat and demanding we go to a restaurant after this so I could eat a decent meal.

They also demanded I ate a desert, encouraging me to continue eating and not worry about my looks, because in their opinion, I looked beautiful.

At the end of the conversation, I had tears in my eyes, and I wiped them away, and I reassured them that it’d be fine to still film the video, as we all wanted to continue.

[locke-esque-monster]

I finished Umbrella Academy last night. The further I got into the season the messier the writing seemed to get. I've seen a few things pointed out already: like Lila totally wore bracelets before, why did Luther go chimp again, Five said Lila wasn't his type etc.. Here's a list I was compiling while I watched of things that didn't sit right or made no goddamn sense. It is by no means exhaustive (meaning that it's definitely not every issue, but definitely exhausting to write).

The whole reason Ben was killed was because he touched Jennifer. But Luther and Victor both touch "The Cleanse" during the department store scene. Luther gets stuck, but all it takes is Victor & Lila to get them out. Victor is pushed away by Ben just before he's shot. Were they both also infected and it didn't have time to stick? Or did the writers truly forget this was a plot point partway into the finale?

Quinn came in on the second meeting with Klaus's client Loretta saying "that was fast". They didn't call for him. They didn't give any indication they were done or that he should interrupt. So for all he knows, he should be walking in on them having sex. So is this poor writing in that they put in a statement that makes zero sense? Or poor writing in that they were watching Klaus "work" with surveillance camera and they just never explained that? (Which for the record that's even more screwed up.)

Speaking of which, did we just forget that Klaus has real issues with consent of his body (see season 2) and locked in small spaces with the dead (see season 1)? Or do the writers just not care and played it for laughs?

So we're down 4 episodes, but we're going to introduce 2 love triangles no one asked for (Sy, Jean, and Gene and Diego, Lila, Five)? Cool, that seems like a smart use of time.

After all the trouble Five has gone through, he's suddenly cool with changing the original timeline? Like no notes, no calculations - just down to mess things up by letting Ben live? Who are you Five? (The only calculations we saw from Five this season were a notebook he found another Five wrote - blasphemy.)

So Five is just going to conveniently find a notebook with a way out and we're never going to explain that?

Lila and Five spend 6 1/2 years searching for a way home, but Five's sad Lila picked Diego and he immediately stumbles into a Deli straight off an exit with all the Fives? And somehow that's not something he or Lila ever found?

Do the writers know how being buried alive works? Because first Klaus opened the coffin easily and then managed to accidentally fall in it and get it so stuck he couldn't get it open again. Incredibly implausible. But then wouldn't he run out of air eventually? Seems like he should have in the half a day he was in there. And I can't imagine the lighter would have been good for that situation (I'm not an expert, but any gas release, does it use air, etc.)

So Lila's family is cool with them missing for days? Claire too? I saw little to no attempt to check in, until it was convenient for the plot for Claire to say Klaus upset her when Allison calls. And multiple days seem to pass, but other than Klaus in his coffin and Ben in the hotel, there's no explanation where they slept, or that they really should be in contact with their families. And at least 2 nights pass for Ben (fight at the barn, hotel).

Ben kind of just turns into OG timeline! Ben around Jennifer. There's no explanation for his change in personality, even just that he was lonely without his family. But other than some vague "I can't stop thinking of her" there's no explanation of why they're so connected and Ben had a personality re-write. It gives us "magic made us fall in love" vibes.

I'm fully convinced that the elevator fight with Luther is a call back to CA:WS but TUA did not have either the money or the motivation to choreograph and film the fight scene, so they just waved their hands and said "close enough".

So we're just not going to explain how Five, who ostensibly is physically about 19 per canon, joined the CIA? And on top of that Five, arguably the sharpest, most paranoid character who took down the Commission in a single day in season 1, never checked into his boss or got suspicious about the CIA?

It's a 13 hour drive, but Klaus just magically got back to town on his own after ditching his family and it's never addressed? We've neither seen him drive and he doesn't seem to have a job to pay for a ride home, so I'm at a loss here. Admittedly, I'm not entirely clear how Allison got back to confront Klaus, unless she rode with Diego and Luther before their CIA trip? Though they also seems to have walked back from the CIA so I'm not sure how they got there either?

Okay, so I'll admit that Ben wouldn't necessarily know Reginald shot him. And I'm guessing Reginald wiped their memories quickly. And Ben's bullet would is less obvious in the back of the head. But you're telling me in the 15-ish years of hanging out together as each others' primary companion (12 in original timeline, 3 in the 60s), Klaus never made a dig about Ben's death? Ben never said something and Klaus repeated that weird statement from Reginald? Neither of them said anything weird about it the other one questioned? I swear that's why Klaus was written a whole separate plot with being kidnapped, so he specifically wasn't around for that scene to question or react to it. Also I'm pissed that it's very likely Klaus never knew how Ben died before he also died.

So after multiple episodes of (completely awful) jokes about Diego getting fat, you're going to actually make the character shirtless for no reason and him look exactly as he did before. I just...really?

Claire makes a comment when Allison first returns like "Why are you saving someone whose immortal?" Like what? First, okay let's assume Claire heard this about Klaus at some point (weird, but not impossible). Allison has been back for 5 minutes from the mission where Klaus got his powers back. Klaus didn't tell her. Allison didn't tell her on the phone call we saw or when she walked in. There is exactly zero reason Claire should have this information again.

Claire and Allison interrogate Quinn and all he tells them is pet cemetery. I'm concerned they don't know it's a dog or the dog's name, but I let it slide. Maybe they'll look for freshly dug holes. They're looking and they hear a dog bark to get them closer and they're like "OMG Thunderbolt". Like they're relieved they found the correct dog's grave when they have not actually been told that name before.

I'm not even going to unpack the mess that is Lila and Five here. Going to have to be a separate post.

(I will add that I'm not contesting the ending being on 8/8/24 when it should be 2025/2026 because if they've reset the timeline, the ending can really be whenever they feel like it. So I guess 1 point in the writers favor to the dozen and a half points I listed against them.)

[playboysaleen]

A Touch in the Dark. (J.O)

One-Shot

Jenna x GN!reader

Summary: Coming from a rough patch in your life, Joy; your close friend finds you an escape and takes you with her to Romania and introduces you to Jenna who is now your girlfriend of four years. Everything was perfect. You had the girl. You finally got to be seen in the music industry but what happens when the love of your life slips through your fingertips and you are stuck trying to move on?

'She was the touch that brought me out the dark."

Warnings: Im from the ghetto so- Violence, Guns, Cursing, Blood, Slight smut, heart break, fluff, gang violence, death, hella angst- all that juice lol.

Word Count: 7k<

Enjoy as i come out of my depressive episode lol.

I did include a song i've made/wrote. So i hope you enjoy that as well. (if you don't like it just keep on reading...)

-----------------------------------------

Rainy days were your favorite but today?

“No, you don’t have the damn right to ‘baby’ me after what I just witnessed with my own eyes.” You spat walking into your small shared house with the small girl hot on your heels behind you.

“Please, it wasn’t what it looked like.” She whispered, grabbing your wrist which you shoved away again. 

“Then tell me what it looked like- what i saw was you and Percy fucking kissing.” You hissed, grabbing the suitcase that sat in the corner of the coat rack. 

“I’m going through a-lot right now.” She cried out which caused you to stop shoving your clothing from your shared bedroom. You waited for her to make her way into the room but she stopped at the door with her eyes focused on her shoes. 

“I told you that you could come to me if there was something on your chest. We communicate, but you go to someone who is obvious on what the hell he wants with you.” mumbling the last few words you continued to shove a few shirts from the closet into the suitcase now. 

“What was so upsetting to you that made you let four years of our relationship go down the drain??” raising your voice now that the truth dawned on you. “Was it when I broke your favorite vase?” you pushed, grabbing a handful of your shirts that hung in the closet tossing them onto the bedroom floor. “Or the time I was home drunk when you missed our anniversary?” You grabbed a pair of shoes and threw them against the suitcase. From the corner of your eye, the small girl fumbled with her fingers now shaking in tears. 

“OR MAYBE that time I didn't take Zero out to use the restroom and he pissed on your Prada shoes that you were going to wear for the sudden meeting with Percy?” You grabbed your laptop bag tossing it onto the bed, 

“Or when-

“I DON”T KNOW IF I LOVE YOU ANYMORE”

You froze. The drumming of your heart could be heart miles away. The rain droplets hit the window as if they were mocking the way your eyes swelled with tears. You inhaled sharply trying your best to keep this mask on for as long as you can. Nodding, you grabbed your phone sending a quick message to the first person that popped in your mind and started packing everything into your suitcase. 

“Could you please just say something?” She pleaded through her cries. Ignoring her, you finished and made your way to the living room grabbing your guitar from your stand taking one last look at the small girl in front of you. 

“All I needed was communication and I would have understood, but here we are.” You laughed out the last few words as the tears started to mimic the rainfall that smacked harder against the roof. The smaller girl crashed into your arms, wrapping tight, afraid you'd disappear in a matter of seconds. Tilting your head up to the ceiling you swore you could see the memories of you two playing over and over. Gently grabbing her arms, you untangled yourself, keeping your eyes on the door. Should you leave? Should you stay and talk? Unfortunately, the little you on your left shoulder won. Grabbing the door handle, you swung the door open taking one last look at the girl that is now on her knees sobbing. 

“I wish this could be different, but I know deep down this would all be the same outcome…I’m sorry Jenna.” and with that you walked away. Closing a door you thought you’d never open again. 

Six Months Later

“Can you just shut the fuck up for one second?” You growled out slapping a hand over your eyes shielding the light coming from the window that your roommate opened. 

“Sorry dear, I cannot. Now get your ass in the studio and start on that song you gotta finish.” Joy spoke, pulling the blankets off your body then proceeding to clean up the liquor bottles from the floor. 

“I heard Wednesday is getting a Season 2.” You started, Joy turned to face you which you quickly waved your hand sending her a small smile. “It’s okay, luckily we stayed in Romania huh?” you added which a sigh of relief slipped her lips. A box was placed in front of you where you glanced at her expression. You quickly waved your finger at her shaking your head.

“No. Take it back.” You mumbled, hopping off the bed walking to your closet grabbing clothes then making your way to the bathroom pointing your finger at Joy once more. 

“Oh come on, it’s been six months. Not only is my team tired of talking to you through me…your fans miss you. Everyone still thinks you died even though I literally post with you everyday.” Joy pleaded, placing the box on your bed pointing back at you. You let out a loud dramatic groan closing the door, placing your hands against the edge of the sink. You stared at your reflection in the mirror, locking with the small scar that slightly hid behind the fresh ink along your chest. Running your left hand over the new tattoos you got a few weeks back that covered most of your neck, back, chest and arms. You were art. You are a masterpiece. Shaking out the memories that flooded your mind, you hopped into the shower starting your day. 

- - - - - - - - - - -

“The lyrics are amazing, just start from the top and for the love of god! Let me start the damn live!” Joy yelled from the other side of the studio. You sent her the finger then a thumbs up. The instrumental started to play in your headphones while you sent a glance at the screen that sat next to you showing the live stream of your fans going crazy. 

I gave what you wanted, 

Love and all my attention, 

But you broke me and strayed away.. 

“Babe! You won't believe what Percy pulled on Emma, funniest prank ever!” Jennas small voice was heard from the front door. You kept your eyes on the guitar strings that you quietly played letting her words echo to the back of your mind. 

“Why are you dressed?” She asked, stopping midway from the kitchen and living room. Your fingers stopped finally looking up at the small woman, you stood placing the instrument on its stand undoing your tie. You shook your head taking the small box from the table, shoving inside your pocket and placing the bouquet of roses on the coffee table. “I am glad you had a good time with the crew. I am going to wash up and call it a night. Goodnight and Happy Anniversary.” 

I heard from an acquaintance, 

That you lose all your patience,

And decided with him you’ll stay. 

“Y/n? Please tell me you’re here…” Joy yelled from the front door hearing her light footsteps running to your room. You laid your head against the wall as you hugged your knees. Joy bursted through the door finally catching your fatigue figure in the corner of your dimmed room. Arms were wrapped around you and you lost it. You let go. 

“It’s okay, let it out. You’re okay.” She whispered into your ear, your hands gripped her shirt tighter as your sobs grew louder. Your smashed phone flickered with the instagram post of Jenna in Percy's arms with the smile you knew too well. 

It was too late. You knew it was him all along. 

But your love, 

Hits me like a ray of pain.

And your love, 

Drowns me in vain like the waves.. 

No lifeboat, No vest. 

I have to love whatever of you I have left… 

And your love,

Drowns me in vain like the waves…

Finishing the song, you open your eyes to see Joy dancing around behind the glass which brought a smile to your face. You noticed a few unknown faces in the engineering room that you never saw before. You tapped the screen ending the live then making your way out the booth to Joy. 

“I didn’t know I would be performing for a crowd,” you joked, extending your hand out to one of the men that quickly copied your actions. You greeted each man then stood next to Joy. 

“The main guy you need to meet should be up here any second.” the man that wore a suit that screamed money spoke, sending you a warm smile. The door opened and when you turned your head to the new face you swore you saw a ghost. 

“You’re Y/n right? I heard so much about you from my girl Joy!” He smiled, you stood frozen processing the man standing in front of you. It was Brent fucking Faiyaz. You extended your hand which he laughed pulling you into a dap/hug. Pulling away, you glanced at joy toying with the engineering computer pointing at the booth which you smiled at.

“So, let's make some music shall we?” 

After a few hours of making a few beats, you gently spun on your chair humming melodies while Brent sat next to you nodding along to the beat that was playing. 

“Can you spit?” Brent spoke out cutting you from your thoughts, you laughed softly, “not really, i never-” Joy entered the studio with snacks sending you a look- “They can.” Brent laughed, pulling out his phone, sending a few more beats to the studio computer. 

“If you want me to be honest,-” you broke the silence standing up from your seat, Brent leaned back in his chair waiting as Joy sent you a small nod. “I don’t want to write my pain in one whole song, I want to throw a little in each one that I write. I want to express not only my side of what I went through but what I feel I was seen on the other…if that makes sense.” Brent's eyes widened and you swore you saw a light bulb go off on top of his head. He pressed his index finger on the space bar, dragging you along with him to the booth while the song started to play.

It ain't the time, for you to walk

If i won't let go

I can tell, that aint what you want

But it's like you can't let it show. 

Brent began to sing his lyrics while you closed your eyes, soaking in the lyrics, generating your own. After his lyrics came to an end, you started- 

Girl, i’ve tried again and again, 

To give you all of me, but you deny

“Girl that aint right” Brent harmonized with your voice which you rushed to the booth restarting your verse and starting where you left off. Brent took a seat next to you on the second mic nodding his way to joy which with no hesitation she pressed play. 

And i chose you, cause you’re all i need, 

And you chose that man, but that man aint me. 

So don’t call my phone, acting like you care

I done made my move, I know life aint fair. 

Brent started the chorus and you decided to harmonize and add your own ad-libs. Brent looked your way sending a thumbs up, you sent him a nod then turned your gaze to Joy which she again, was jumping around in the engineering room. You glanced at the Ipad on the stand to see the live stream going and one comment stood out-

“Whoever they’re singing about should be ready to see their face everywhere.” 

It was like that comment was true. Here you are two weeks later on a flight with Joy and with a last minute invitation; Letitia. Yes. Shuri- THE black panther. And yes, you did break your neck to look around to see if Michael was with her but to your luck he was not. You did get a DM from him a day later when you landed in LA. A small “My bad on not being able to join you guys on the LA vacay, I’ll try my best to see if i can make it. Best of luck bro!” 

Honesty? A DM? When you started he did reach out and you both talked for a bit before he was pulled for another movie. That was all you needed to realize that you are getting buzz. You are no longer a shadow. Hiding behind someone who welcomed all the shine, but the way you held onto Jenna made you feel like you were touching the sun. She was your star, but sometimes the sun can be harmful. You were burning but the warmth and abliss you felt from the pain had you blinded. 

“Okay you two, let's get the work out the way and we can make our way to the splurging.” You joked, making your way down the stairs of the jet Letitia happens to own. You opened the door for the women then followed behind them into the car. 

“So how does it feel to be in LA?” Joy asked, rolling her window down letting the dusk air run along her arm. Letitia nodded along with Joy, mindlessly scrolling through her TikTok. 

You hummed softly playing with your highschool ring then looking around at the scenery in awe. 

“This is actually my first time in LA.” Both pairs of eyes widen at your answer. 

“You never been to LA? What about New York?” You shook your head, 

“Just to Romania. Born and raised in Texas.” Letitia rolled her eyes leaning over to the driver showing him the new address which caused you to furrow your eyebrows. What are they up to?

“So, your first collaboration is actually here in LA and she just sent me the address.” You nodded, awaiting who it would be, “How do you feel about SZA?” Your eyes almost popped out of your head. Breathlessly laughing, you nodded again but with A LOT more energy. 

“For the love of god! Please don’t turn into a tomato!” 

Damn Joy. 

But a tomato you were. 

“Can you stop looking like you’re constipated?” Joy whispered to you. Looking up from your phone you sent her the bird but quickly shoving your hand into your jacket pocket when SZA walked into the studio. 

“I love your lyrics Y/N,” 

You only nodded, glancing at the two knuckleheads going back and forth while you sat against the high chair playing with the Audio chord. 

“Let's start then.” Whispering, SZA sent you a smile sending a nod to Joy as she pressed play. You shuffled to the side grabbing the other mic stand starting your verse,

I'll touch that fire for you

I do that three four times again, I testify for you

I told that lie, I'd kill that- mmmh..

You softly scoffed in the mic sending a shy smile to SZA continuing your verse. Joy eyed your body language as a small laugh made its way out her mouth. “They’re slowly coming back, it makes my heart happy that they finally get to express how they feel.” Letitia chuckled leaning against the desk glancing every now and then at the live stream that saw you and SZA nodding and swaying to the music. 

“So when are you going to tell them?” Letitia asked. Joy hummed, shaking her head, 

“Percy knows what he is doing and I am scared that he will try to get under their skin to get them to break.” Joy answered as she edited the EQ on your voice then glanced at Letitia. “They know. They just do not want to say anything. Y/n is still trying to open up about everything, so let's give them time.” Letitia nodded at her response, going back to listening to you and SZA. 

I do what all of them around you scared to do, I'm not

Long as you juggin' out here for me, I got it

Mobbin', schemin', lootin', hide your bodies

Long as you dreamin' 'bout me, ain't no problem

I don't got nobody, just with you right now

Tell the truth, I look better under you

Sza started her hook which caught you by surprise, a huge smile plastered on your face when she placed her hand on your arm. She closed her eyes, finishing the hook which did leave you blown away. She went and dived right into her verse and the hook again. 

In the droptop ride with you, I feel like Scarface (Scarface)

Like that white bitch with the bob, I'll be your main one (main one)

Let's take this argument back up to place

Sex remind you, I'm nonviolent, I'm your day one

We ain't had shit, yeah, it was magic, yeah

Smash and grab shit, yeah

Nasty habits take a hold when you not here

Ain't a home when you not here

Hard to grow when you not here, I'm sayin'

I can't lose when I'm with you

How can I snooze and miss the moment?

You just too important

Nobody do body like you do

I can't lose when I'm with you

How can I snooze and miss the moment?

You just too important

Nobody do body like you do, you do

You signaled Joy to keep the track going when a idea popped into your head, 

Main one ridin'

How you frontin' on me and I'm the main one tryin'?

How you blame it on me and you the main one lyin'?

How you threatenin' to leave and I'm the main one cryin'?

Just tryna be your everything

Main one ridin'

How you frontin' on me and I'm the main one tryin'?

How you blame it on me and you the main one lyin'?

How you threatenin' to leave and I'm the main one cryin'?

SZA leaned into the mic singing the hook. You nodded along adding faint back vocals which Joy was right on top of. Once the song ended you glanced at the Ipad noticing a comment that made a lump form in your throat. 

Jenna joined Y/n’s live? My life is complete.

SZA rammed into your body which to your instincts held her waist as she squealed swaying you both side to side. You laughed lightly pulling back locking eyes with SZA. “WE DID IT!” you nodded at her excited outburst. “We did, you were amazing.” now she was quiet looking between your eyes. 

“You have beautiful eyes, and your nose is cute and-” 

“Ohhhkay, SZA girl, you are a little too close to my lova!” Letitia spoke into the mic which caused SZA to shuffle back sending a playful glare at the two girls giggling. “Better cuff 'em now or I’m gonna have to take matters into my own hands!” SZA joked back that you stood frozen and for sure looking like a tomato. SZA looked back at you, satisfied with the reaction she got out of you. She leaned forward placing a kiss on your cheek walking out the booth. You glanced at the screen seeing too many hearts flying around. You chuckled, rubbing the back of your neck. 

“Please know my loves, my safe word is Pineapples and well… I'm really close to screaming Pina Colada.” Laughing emojis popped up and a name popped up with a blue check- 

Proud of you.

You hummed, eyeing the comment then moving back, making your way out the booth leaning against the desk next to Letitia. You whispered a ‘thanks’ to her which she lightly bumped her shoulder against yours nodding. “You know I got you.” 

“Alright, let's see their engineering skills Joy!” SZA hollered from the far end of the studio. She laid on the couch typing her way on her phone. You took a few steps into the studio grabbing the guitar playing a few chords. Why was she on your live? It's been months since you’ve spoken to her and you can’t shake this fire feeling in your chest that comes around when she's mentioned. Was it resentment? Anger? Unbagged feelings? 

“You just finished a song and you're already making another?” Letitia's voice brought you back from your thoughts when she took a seat next to you. Shrugging your shoulders, you continued to play the chords whispering a few lyrics. 

“She was my source of happiness and now that she is gone? This is all I have left.” You answered by playing a few more chords then placing the guitar next to you. You leaned your head on Leititas shoulder sighing softly. “Are you ready for tonight?” She whispered back, you nodded sliding your phone out your pocket answering Micheal back from his simple ‘WYD’ DM. 

“I invited my two homies in case anything pops off, they can handle it.” Leitia playfully scoffed, bumping your shoulder. “I don’t think anything will go in that route tonight, I forget how you grew up; Jenna really took you out the hood huh?” You huffed rolling your eyes as a small smile crept onto your face. 

“It was a nightmare, but here we are. Oh, Rome and Jay are on the way to the AirBnb. Let's scoop them up and we’ll go on that shopping spree I promised.” Letitia snorted, hopping up pulling you with her. You both made your way out the booth into the studio joining in on Joy’s and SZA conversation. 

*time skip*

“You take longer than a whole female bro.” Jay gasped, dramatically placed his hand on his chest. Romeo snorted, draping his arm over your shoulder placing all his weight onto you which caused the both of you to fall over the couch. “Get. off.” Laughing loudly, you rolled away from the boy mirroring your actions falling into a boxing stance. 

“I don’t see why you even try, they in that southpaw stance. You gonna get fu-” Jays words were shoved right back in his mouth when Rome hunched over holding his stomach. You hopped around smirking at the boy below you trying to catch his breath. 

“Should have listened to Jay.” You giggled when Rome rushed your way but missed terribly when you dodged his action sending him into the arm of the couch. 

“Alright you animals, let's go.” Joy yelled from upstairs coming down with Letitia by her side. Jay leaned against the bar flashing his pearly whites, “Have I told you that our kids will be the most beautiful mixed kids on this planet?” Joy rolled her eyes passing the tall boy as you sent a smack towards the boy's head. You all giggled heading down to the rental car. 

*Time Skip*

You casually lean back on the comfortable seat watching Joy and Letitia try on different clothing. Jay and Rome both were sprawled out on the bigger couch in the corner, Joy giggled at something Letitia whispered which you mindlessly ignored and kept aware of your surroundings. 

“If you don’t relax and come try on this outfit i swear.” Joy spoke which snapped you out of your thoughts. Shrugging your shoulders, you went back to eyeing the patterns on the wall. Jay eyed your body language while Rome laid his head against Jay snoring softly. 

“Y/m/n.” Joy warned. Rome jumped out of his sleep searching for the voice when he saw you sink deeper into your chair. Jay snorted, shaking his head. “She is middle naming you now, I think you should try it on.” You rolled your eyes,hopping out your seat walking to the dressing room trying on the outfit. Sighing at your reflection, you walked out awaiting for the girl's answers. 

“Yea, no. Take it off.” Joy mumbled eyeing the pants you wore. You dragged your feet back into the dressing room changing into your regular clothes. A voice was heard outside the door which you quickly buttoned up your jeans peeking your head out the door. A bright smile plastered your face when you saw who it was. 

“What's up homie!” jogging to the man, you pulled him into a hug laughing softly. “Micheal B Jordan! Who knew he would come kick it with a youngin.” he laughed holding his hands up, “I see potential and your vibe is amazing, need you around homie!” You playfully scoffed, shaking your head pulling him in for another hug. 

“Since you are here, get this flea a fit before I lose my mind.” Joy joked pushing you both out the dressing room area out the store. Micheal said his ‘hellos’ to Jay and Rome then threw his arm over your shoulder. 

“We gon’ give them something to look at.” MB jokes, dragging you out of the store and down the street into a streetwear store. A smile crept on your face when you see the shoes come into view. “Now this is me.” 

*SkipTime*

It was way more better shopping with the guys and no, not meaning the girls were annoying it was more of a get in and out gameplay. Jay hummed at your outfit as you walked out your bedroom, “You look like you’re about to go steal a lot of wives” You snorted at his comment fixing your collar to your thin shirt. You shook your foot feeling the tightness of the dress shoe which you were growing to dislike. MB noticed your expression tossing you the bag you bought earlier. 

“Wear the forces, it’ll complete the look then fit with your style.” Placing on the shoes, Rome came down stairs from your guest bedroom leaning against the rail. “Damn, who mama we takin’ tonight?” Jay snorted lobbing the football to Rome which to my surprise caught from upstairs. 

​​

Grabbing the small box from the duffle bag, you opened the box grabbing the watch that caused a lump to form in your throat. Examining the gold watch, your finger ran over the engraved name that you never thought you would come close to again. Placing on the watch you grabbed the cologne bottle spraying it onto your neck and wrist. 

“You never told me the name of that panty droppa” Jay joked walking past you towards the bar grabbing the keys twirling them towards MB. Jay tossed the keys to MB who quickly caught it sending a playful wink your way. You scoffed bumping your shoulder against his, 

“Do not get fruity on me baby boy.” MB made a face while Rome wrapped his arm around the taller man following you out the Airbnb. “But-” Jay lifted his hand shaking his head, “It’s what we deal with, don’t even try bro.” You let out a giggle opening the backseat door for Rome sending him a dashing smile. 

“For you my love” Rome placed a hand over his chest then playfully fanned his face. “What a gentleman!” You sent a fist into his shoulder which sent him stumbling into the backseat. Taking a seat in the passenger side you looked towards MB sending a small smile. 

“Now lets see how this goes”

The ride was pretty eventful with the three boys. Singing, well, horribly. Heated debates and very funny remarks. MB reminded you of one of your close cousins you grew up with back home. Unfortunately, you lost him to gun violence but Micheal was a spitting image of him. Personality and all, so it brought you instant peace once you started getting back in touch with him again. Jay aka Jaime was your ‘almost’ adopted brother; grew up with you since elementary. From standing up to the snot heads in 4th grade for you to running from the laws right by your side. He was with you through it all, he never let one disrespect you or look at you the wrong way. Romeo was your best friend. Rome is what you called him since you loved to make fun of his clumsiness, he’s always leaning before he falls. He always looked up to you. The way you could ‘hold your head high when your life was crashing down’ is what he says to you the moment he gets the call about the breakup. Now that boy can keep you and Jay on your toes. Very. VERY. hard headed. Remember the sweet moment from 4th grade with Jay then the marathon with the laws? 

“Wake the fuck up!” Jay yelled barging into your room going through your closet. Jumping out of your sleep, you snapped your head to your brother tossing a hoodie into your face. You slipped on the piece of clothing then slipped on your shoes. 

“Talk to me. What happened?” Jay huffed, grabbing the backpack you knew too well. You groaned, grabbing the end of the mattress, lifting and letting Jay grab the firearm that laid underneath the suit you placed on top. A small voice screamed for you to not do this but hey, you knew you had to do what you had to do. You followed behind Jay out the door, hopping in his car driving to the location. 

“What the dingo do now?” you asked. Jay did not respond when you knew the answer when the street sign caught your eye. He didn’t even get the chance to place the car in park when you sprung out sprinting into the alley. Three hooded figures sent kicks and blows into the person curled up on the floor. Using all the power in your arm, you sent a fist into one of the men knocking him down. Jay was right behind you throwing jabs at another, grabbing the pipe that laid against the wall you swung hitting the boy (his hood now off his head) in the shoulder. 

“Tell Carlos he got some balls sending people to come fuck with us.” You growled, grabbing the other person, shoving him into the ground. Jay knocked the last boy into the wall which sent him limping to his crew. One of the boys sent you a smile, blood coating his teeth. 

“Carlos just wanted to send his condolences, he was aiming for a close casket.” Once those words slipped his mouth Rome was quick to grab the hand that was already reaching into your waistband. Jay used his own pistol, sending shots near their feet that sent them running for the hills. Tears pricked your eyes as the words kept playing in your head. Lights flashed in your peripheral that caused the three of you to start sprinting to the car. You pushed Rome in the direction of the car. 

“GO. They won't know it's you, meet us at home.” Rome sighed at your command but was quick to catch the keys from Jay driving off. You looked at Jay sending him a sad smile. 

“Still remember the way?” You asked Jay jogging down the alley

“Like it was yesterday.”

Stepping out of the vehicle you noticed a lot of paparazzis front of the restaurant/bar. Grabbing the shades from your pocket you mentally prepared yourself for the shouting for the man next to you. 

“Bliss!”

“Over Bliss!”                   “Looking good Y/N!” 

Your eyes widen at the multiple calls of your name when MB laughed softly, 

“Since when did I get clout?” completely in shock, you started making your way up the stairway but not forgetting to flash a smile to the cameras. Jay snorted, patting your back then striking a pose with you, “You were all over shaderoom with SZA '' ahhh, that's what it was. Probably some rumors about you both being together. Well she was beautiful but realistically speaking, you could NOT handle all that… beauty. Yeah. Beauty. Laughing out loud at the thought you reached the last step watching the door being opened for you by Rome. 

“Bliss! Were you involved with the altercation with Jenna and Percy?” 

You planted your feet, snapping your head to the voice that caused your body to go into autopilot. You walked to the voice standing in front of the man. Jay missed your arm by an inch trying his best to pull you back. 

“What happened?” 

The older man's eyes widen at the fact that you were in front of him awaiting for a answer, “Last night there is footage of them two arguing and Percy looked to be a little up close and personal with Jenna and-” he did not even get to finish, you were already making your way inside to the huge table in the back to sat all the faces you knew too well but one stood out. Jenna's eyes caught your heated figure and immediately stood from her chair to stop you. Joy began to panic knowing the look on your face but before you could reach the table MB, Jay and Rome were pushing you into the doors of the huge area for the restrooms. 

“Hey! You are not thinking right now. Calm down.” MB was the first to speak as Jay had you trapped between him and the wall. Rome was keeping watch at the door making sure no one came in. You couldn't help but dig your fingernails into your palms trying your best to keep your past actions inside. 

“I just want to talk to him.” you breathed out trying to squeeze your way out of Jay’s hold to only be shoved once again into the wall. 

“This is what he wants Y/n. To ruin your image. Be smart on this.” Rome spoke, shaking his head at the window at the door shoo’ing off the person attempting to walk in. You took a deep breath realizing the truth. You can't go out like this. This is what she wanted. That is not your concern anymore. She is not yours and you are not hers. You nodded, taking a few breaths but hissed at the stinging in your hand. Jay huffed yet chuckled, grabbing the napkins that were displayed in the area and applied it to your hand. 

“Old habit huh.” you smiled fixing your collar then nodding at MB and the duo. Jay sighed sending a small smile your way starting his way out the doors. MB patted your shoulder slightly pushing you out the doors. “I really wanted to get some hits on this fine Friday evening.” Rome mumbled which you snorted, slapping the back of his head. Making your way to the table, Letitia was the first to stand bringing you into a hug. 

“You good?” Her muffled question only made you nod patting her back. Moving away, you gave everyone a smile and a simple ‘Hey’ which Emma was quick to dash out her seat jumping into your arms. “Oh how i have missed you!” She fake cried squeezing her thighs around your waist that sent a loud yelp out your mouth. Joy was quick to pull her off at the sudden touch that was quick to spark your anxiety. 

“Woah, now you look good.” Georgie commented, making his way to your side bringing you into a hug. You wrapped your arms around him, tightening your hold, he was your right hand when you went to visit Jenna on set. If Jenna was out with her girls or Percy, He’d come over or you would be in his living room playing Call of Duty Online while he sat in his gaming room streaming with you. He noticed the change in Percy and Jenna when everything was starting to go downhill. He was the first to bring it to your attention but being so in love with the girl, you ignored it. Maybe being secure makes you an easy target to take for granted. 

“You've been working out?” Georgie asked wrapping his hand around your inner bicep squeezing that sent a shock into your side that made you flinch sending a light punch into his arm laughing softly. The man sent out a small yelp holding his arm mumbling, “oh yeah, you have.” You moved down the line till you came to a face that you knew too well and no, it was not Jenna. 

“Going ghost is what you do now huh?” Johnna spoke, pulling you into a very tight hug. Patting her back, you gently pulled away and sent her a small smile. “Just needed to get away from the world.” She only nodded, keeping her eyes locked into yours. See, the thing with Johnna was she had her eyes on you along with Jenna when you came around. You were a friend of Joy’s when she dragged you to Romania after the behavior change you had once you lost your cousin. That was 4 years ago, but as you can tell Jenna won your heart and Johnna became the scout on the sidelines just waiting her turn. ‘A benchwarmer’ is what Rome said when he literally saw her watching you like a hawk in the distance. Jay cleared his throat allowing you to finally pull away from her hold taking a seat next to Joy. The gods above are probably laughing their asses off on how the seating was at the long table. Looking up to grab the menu a familiar ring came into your view. 

“Hi.” Jenna breathed out, your eyes widened at her voice quickly averting your gaze to look over at the boy sitting next to her which you regretted when he sent a smirk your way and placed a small peck onto Jennas cheek. 

“Hey.” Was all you said as you grumbled profanities, an idea popped in your head; glancing at Jay which he already caught your drift whispering in Johnna’s ear as she quickly switched seats with him and sent you a very bright smile leaning into your side. Most of the time you’d catch Jenna sneaking glances your way when you’d crack a joke and Johnna would laugh pretty loud. You did pull a dick move when you wiped the smudge lipstick on the side of her lip with your thumb, that seemed to catch Rome’s attention that caused him to choke on his drink. 

The main dishes arrived and everyone got to digging in and continuing to catch up on whatever they left off on. To your luck, your social battery was draining and the anxiety you hated so much decided to toy with you. You lifted your hand to grab the condiment yet it slipped from your sweaty palm, fell onto the plate and some landed on your shirt; Now that spiked your anxiety. The shakiness in your hands increased as you went to run your hand through your hair. Jay noticed when you quickly dismissed yourself from the table wobbling to the restroom. 

“Stupid fucking shit!” You mumbled out attempting to clean out the stain on your shirt and pants. The stain seemed to be getting worse which was now ticking at your anger, 

“You never had much patience with cleaning.” Your head shot up to the voice then snapped back to the stain cleaning it. Jenna took a few steps towards you which you stepped back shaking your head. 

“Please, let me.” your hands dropped to your side while she stood in front of you with a small cloth. 

“Dab. Don’t wipe.” You couldn’t stop the roll of your eyes. Of course she’d say that. She was never home but when she was mad she would power clean the whole damn house. You felt pressure near your lower area which you caught her hand but couldn't stop the grunt that fell from your lips. 

“Stop. I got it.” She took a small step back watching your movements but noticed the shaking in your hands. “Breathe.” She whispered but was only an echo in the back of your mind. Shaking your head, the room started to shrink which was not helping at all. Jenna knew these attacks too well when she gently placed her hands on the sides of your face locking her gaze into yours. Everything stopped. The voices. The noises. The pain. Oh how bad have you been hurting since you left her side. 

“I love you.” 

That was all that could be said. You loved her. You missed her. You needed her. It only came out as a whisper but to her, it sounded like you screamed from the top of your lungs. 

“And I love you.” 

Hearing her words an instant image of Percy popped in your head which you flinched away, moving as far as you possibly could. No. She doesn't love you. Not as much as you do. God, how you missed her. Her simple yet fancy attire really brought out the success she has done. She looked down nodding her head, “I know.” 

“Do you love him?” She was quick on her toes blurting out a ‘no’ and you were back putty in her hands again. 

“Being away from you for so long made me realize that I am deeply in love with you and I can't live without you.” she whispered again slowly pulling you closer. The height difference was very noticeable when you had to look down at the girl whose head was almost laid on your chest. 

“In love or scared of being alone?” Now that caught her off guard, she looked up to see the tired look in your eyes. She knew there were still nights you dreamed of losing your cousin and to make things a tad worse, you lost her. She knew you were in a war with your old self, trying to stay afloat. 

A knock on the door echoed through the restroom and a voice you grew to dislike caused you to move away from Jenna. “Jen? You okay?” Percy asked through the door. Jenna sighed replying with a ‘yes’ which you rolled your eyes fixing the belt on your jeans. 

The doors opened revealing Percy. Jenna’s eyes widened at the actions he's done when you were quick on your toes walking towards him. “You’re not supposed to be in here.” a smirk visible on his face, your height was a bit shorter but you’ve taken on men twice his size. He’ll be a simple sleeper. 

“Like you’re welcomed in here.” 

Jenna’s eyes almost popped out her sockets when you only chuckled, running your tongue over your top teeth. Looking at the boy sending him a small tight lipped smile but Jenna was quick to step between the two of you pushing Percy out the restroom. 

“Get your man Marie, or my crew will.” Jenna nodded quickly but Percy opened the door wide sending you one last look that you wanted to swipe off his damn face. 

“Jen, make sure your dog is tamed.” You turned, grabbing the wash cloth from the sink, running it under the water. Knuckles white, you were hoping the boys knew you were gone for a while, coming to the rescue. 

“Put a leash on that street mutt while you’re at it.” Jenna turned to Percy instantly shoving him back at his choice of words but it was too late. You had enough. 

Walking to the boy, not caring the smaller girl was between you two, you wrapped the damped towel around your knuckles sending a fist into his nose. The boy stumbled back out the doors landing on his back. Jay and Rome were quick on sprinting to the scene, grabbing you off the boy. Percy took his chance when you were struggling against Rome, he jumped up and cocked his arm back connecting his fist to your jaw. 

“You should let me go now.” You warned Rome and he released his hold from your shirt when you sprung towards the boy sending multiple jabs to his face. Letting the last punch be a reminder to not fuck with you, his body folded dropping onto the table everyone was sat at. See, simple sleeper. Gasps fell from the people's mouth when you sprung once more at the boy, but this time Jenna stood in front of you with her hands on your chest. 

“Stop, please.” 

The adrenaline faded instantly once you came to your senses. Jenna had tears in her eyes, MB was holding Rome against a wall trying to calm him down, Jay had his hand on your shoulder speaking to you but his voice was miles away. Johnna held a look in her eye, it was maybe arousal? Letitia seemed disappointed but nodded at the result. and Joy? She held a look of relief. Maybe he needed a reality check and you were the one to give it to him. Finally locking eyes with the girl in front of you, you sent a painful chuckle her way. 

“And here I thought you’d find someone better than me,” Jenna sent a look you couldn’t quite dissect when Jay finally tapped your shoulder. 

“We gotta go. MB got the whip out back.” You nodded leaning back, making your way out the back door. Letitia and Joy made their way by your side walking through the kitchen. 

“I’m sorry it has to come to this.” was all you could say. Joy scooped up a frozen pack of vegetables that laid on the board, placing it against your jaw. The SUV came into view when you slid into the front seat keeping your eyes locked on the dashboard in front of you. 

“If you all are going to scold me for breaking, save it.” You mumbled feeling a warm stream of blood drip from your lip. Quickly wiping it off with the end of your shirt, Joy snorted which caused you to turn your head in her direction to meet everyone with proud smirks on their faces. 

“I am not mad. Letitia?” Letitia shook her head, “I think Rome shouldn’t have grabbed you in the first place.” MB snorted tapping you on the shoulder, you rolled your eyes trying your best to contain the small tugging the corner of your lips. 

“Do not be mad, but you are not going back to the bnb.” MB mumbled, your eyebrows furrowed when a gate you knew too well. The huge metal gates opened when your door was opened by a man in a black suit. Leaning against the door, you mumbled to the man- “Just tell her I fell out the car a few miles back.” He only smiled shaking his head, 

“I would if I could, but she's watching the cameras as we speak. She will be arriving here shortly.” You could only groan and drag your feet up the driveway. 

“We don’t need any babies in the house anytime soon-” Jay shouted from the back window while you were quick to toss the melting bag at the boy's head which sent a ‘oof’ out his mouth. The car howled in laughter as they drove off into the night. Sighing, you reached her door by putting in the code. Stepping into her large entrance, you made your way to the kitchen opening the fridge grabbing a water bottle. hopping onto the island you looked around her kitchen to see everything was still the same from the last time you were here. Maybe from her being in Romania and filming Beetlejuice or Scream. Sliding off the island and tossing the empty water bottle into the recycle bin you walked up the stairs to a room you knew too well. 

“Damn Jenna,” you whispered, turning on the Neon sign that illuminated the entire room. You hummed and smiled when the sound echoed throughout the room. You walked to the small desk that still held your laptop taking a seat. Logging in, your last mix was still open and untouched from the last time you were in here and that was maybe a year ago. The song was complete but you felt like it deserved a slower version. Pressing play, you started your journey on changing the tempo, tune and even adding chops. What you didn’t notice after a good thirty minutes was a silhouette of the girl leaning against the door lost in your zone. Nodding your head at your results, moving your fingers with the beat and singing along. 

“You were always stuck on that song.” she finally spoke which caused you to snort softly nodding. You started the song back to mix and save the song cause who were you to pull a rookie mistake. 

“Wasn’t my type of vibe at the time, but i finished it.” you started turning to face her, “You always wondered who i was writing about, it was about you when i first saw you.” Jenna smiled your way, opening the door wider, letting the hallway light shine onto your face. Her smile fell when she noticed the dried blood on your shirt and the cut on your lip still bleeding. You stood on your feet walking out the room into her bedroom heading straight to her master bath. Plotting down on the toilet with Jenna already grabbing the first aid kit, you hummed quietly awaiting for the war you knew was about to start. 

“George told me that you broke his nose and he needed stitches for his eyebrow” she started grabbing the gauze placing it onto the top of the alcohol bottle. You turned your gaze from her actions scoffing loudly. “That's not enough.” she shook her head applying the cloth onto your lip which did cause you to flinch back. A loud sound rang through the bathroom when your elbow rammed into the toilet top. A growl bubbled your throat when you looked up through your lashes to see Jenna placing a hand on her hip watching the sight in front of her. 

“You didn’t warn me.” A hand was placed on your thigh which you grumbled spreading your legs slightly open so the girl could step in between. 

“You should be used to this by now.” She was right. You should be but you werent. Jenna met you at a bad time in your life. The late nights where you appeared at her doorstep with the sound of the constant ‘no’s’ you mumbled and bloodied clothes that were indeed yours. Broken ribs, black eyes, concussions and you promised her to not take you to the hospital. To this day, she's kept it. After applying a damp rag on your jaw, Jenna moved to grab the small can of ointment to place on your lip. Standing up, you leaned against the sink watching her movements. 

“I heard about the argument from some camera head.” Jenna hummed, keeping her eyes strained on the ointment. She shook her head but the way she was at peace caused you to lean closer towards her. “You don't deserve that Marie.” you continued, placing your shaking hand onto hers. She looked up to see your hooded eyes. 

“Then what do I deserve?” she whispered when your free hand ghosted over her hip. You shrugged, sending her a playful smirk. 

“A bliss.” 

“Oh really?” She teased. You nodded towering over her, the ointment was long gone from the both minds that only craved one thing. 

“I-”

Her lips smashed against yours, with a force that caused your backside to hit the sink. You wrapped your arms around her waist pulling her closer. So close you could feel her body molding into yours. You pulled away when your chest felt very tight, shaking your head leaning your body back against the sink. 

“We going too fast now” You whispered, placing everything back into the first aid kit. Her chest heaving from the heavy breathing, she agreed with a nod walking into her room disappearing in her huge closet. You awkwardly stood in the middle of her room not knowing what to do. She walked back out with a set of clothes that were yours, you sent her a small smile grabbing the clothes from her hands walking back into the restroom. You turned on the shower then you were back in front of the mirror with your head in your hands. Removing your shirt, you noticed there was more dried and fresh blood streaming down your side. Grumbling, you turned towards the side trying to see where the blood came from but to your luck, you couldn't see shit. 

“You’re bleeding.” Jenna spoke again, you nodded still trying to see where the bleeding was from but she could. Grabbing the rag from the sink and placing it onto your back, a satisfied sigh slipped from your lips. Her fingers ran along your back and sides causing your knuckles to turn white from gripping the counter a little too hard. 

“It should stop when you shower, let me get you a towel.” Before she could walk away you grabbed her hand bringing her back to you. “I just want to say thank you…for you know helping me and not seeing me as the bad guy.” there was a small spark in her eyes which caused everything to go dark around her. The spark you saw when she first stood this close to you when she caught you playing a pick up game with your crew after she came home for a short vacation. 

“Aye Bliss, ain't that yo girl?” Rome shouted from down the court while you were trying to get out of this weak ass lock up from Pedro. You glanced to see the small girl taking a seat on the bleachers with a small smile on her face. Two tall buff men sat next to her when all you could do was smirk. “Come on B, you ball hogging.” Pedro mumbled reaching in to steal the ball, you moved the ball to your free hand leaving him in the dust. You did a no-look-pass towards Jaime letting him drop a dime. Sending a cocky smile you pushed his buttons, “I see you missed your appointment with Dr.D since them ankles keep breaking.” Everyone laughed but then ran your way when Pedro pushed you with force causing you to fall on your back. Quickly hopping back up with Rome wrapping his arms around you moving you away from the scene.  

“Go with yo girl brah” you laughed as he pushed you her way. Fixing your necklace and sending her that billion dollar smile. “What’s good mama!” She jumped into your arms as you held her close. She wore a mask and hoodie on so no one couldn’t tell who she was but the two men gave it away for you and the crew. ‘We know it’s yo girl with all that security she got’ is what your boys would say when you would get that ‘i’m outside’ the first time you both started seeing each other. You brought her back down to her feet with your hands still on her waist. Her eyes held a spark that made your heart pick up speed. 

“I missed you.” she whispered still with her eyes locked on yours. You both didn’t dare move a muscle, you could see the things she wanted to say in her eyes. It’s like the sun knew how you both felt when it hit just right in her eyes. “And I missed you. Pull down the mask and give me a kiss, ain't nobody watching.” She let out a small giggle doing what you told and smashed her lips into yours. 

“Mane y'all take that lovey dovey shit somewhere else!” one of the players shouted when you only laughed into the kiss pulling her closer. 

It was very hard to keep your feelings at bay when the girl you loved more than words could explain when she was in your arms giving you the look that made you change to who you are today. You let her go grab the towel as you removed your pants so you were left in your sports bra and briefs. She came back and handed you a towel when she stood eyeing the new ink on your skin. 

“You finally got the ink you always wanted huh?” she started as you ran your hand under the water humming when the water was just right. “Yeah, I still have my sides to do but you know.” you answered, Jenna leaned against the door frame again chuckling softly. 

“You got time.” Your smile fell when the cries of your aunt echoed in your ears. “Time is something we take for granted. This life I live? I don’t have time, I could go any second due to the life I lived.” You spoke, grabbing the towel and placing it onto the toilet top. “That is why I spent every moment with you like it was my last. The thought of leaving this earth with us not on good terms will literally crush me even in the afterlife.” Finally looking up at the girl in front of you, tears brimmed her eyes as she moved closer wrapping her arms around your waist and burying her face into your chest. 

“You gave me the world and I still put you through so much. I wanted to take you from a place that caused you pain and here I am feeding more into it.” She spoke into your chest. Sighing, you pulled away looking down at her. 

“Let me ask you something.” You started, pulling away letting her hop on the sink awaiting your question. “What did he give you that I couldn’t?” 

“I was waiting for a time to tell you this. All those years I kept you hidden from the world that I couldn’t take you anywhere I went. It was draining not having you with me that I decided that it was time to tell the world that you were my person.” She started. You noticed it was going to take a turn when she started playing with her bracelet. “I went to my team to let them know and it went downhill. Most were fine with my decision- hell my manager was happy about it but my PR manager was furious. He wanted me to be with Percy since you were not good for my image. So I spent more time with Percy and I was blinded by wanting to get the stunt over with that being away from you made him seem like someone I could fall into.” You nodded and leaned against the wall keeping your eyes locked on the sliding glass that began to fog up from the hot water. 

“Why did you kiss him?” You whispered, preparing for the worst. You wanted an explanation and even if it was months since everything happened you wanted answers. This girl was your everything and finding out all this information made guilt engulf you whole. 

“He kissed me. A few hours before…” She motioned her hand between you two. “Everything happened, I was in a meeting and they wanted to do a stunt that involved a kiss. I hated it. I denied it so I was on the way to go see you when Emma stopped me and it was like the world wanted me to sink in a hole. Percy got word before I did and being the prick he is…He gave me a hug and kissed me.” a short breath darted out your nose. You looked to meet her eyes when all you saw were tears. 

“He knew you were there. Everything was crashing at once. I tried to explain and I admit that I said things I didn’t mean but the moment you walked out that door I realized I lost the most important person in my life. I lost my light.” She finished looking up from her hands to meet your gaze. 

“I went back home when I left.” Her eyes widened when you whispered your confession. “I went to go see my family, and if the world wanted to kill me…not only did I lose my cousin who was like a brother to me,” You stopped trying to swallow the lump in your throat. “I lost my Aunt two weeks after I got back. I fell into this dark place for a few weeks. I went to see Marcos.” Jenna whispered a ‘no’ when that name flew out your mouth. “I did some things that still haunt me at night because I was hurt. Alone. I decided to come back after being there for a good month and Joy took me in and I’ve been trying to pick myself back up since.” 

“I wanted a life with you. A family. I respected your decision with your privacy because at the end of the day I was the one you came home to. Jenna, I felt so lost when everything happened and all we needed to do was communicate.” You finished wiping the single tear that slipped down your cheek. 

“Would you leave if I asked you, could we try this again?” Jenna whispered. Due to the steam now filling the room you could barely see the small girls frown. You took a step closer. “Would you leave if I told you to give me a hundred dollars and you get a deal?” A laugh flew out the girls mouth at your humor when you moved to the switch to turn on the vent. Her hand was placed on yours stopping you, her free hand cupped your cheek and once you saw the look in her eyes you leaned in placing your lips against hers. 

Your lips moved in sync as if both were made for one another. The fireworks that no longer felt like bombs you ran from but the pure feeling of relief you searched for in the last six months. The force of anticipation in the girl in front of you caused your back to hit the wall but the warm water sent a gasp out your mouth and a giggle out of hers.

That didn’t matter after a few seconds when Jenna's hands went to her soaked shirt, removing it. Clothes were discarded and lips were placed in places you both desired. You craved her as if she was the cool hidden sanctuary in the hot scorching desert. She craved you as if you were the nectar from the flower that only grew in a place that no one could reach in this cruel world. You both craved each other in this asylum you all call home. Scientists say the earth is seventy one percent water but all the water you need to quench the thirst of happiness is right in front of you…dropping onto her knees. 

***

After a few hours of reuniting in your words, your head rested against Jennas pillow as her head laid against your chest humming softly. You sighed running your fingers through her hair, 

“So what now?” 

Jennas head lifted, her eyes staring into yours, she placed a chaste kiss onto your lips drawing shapes onto your cheek, 

“Well, if you are up for it…I am actually on a two week break as of right now. We can head to the office for a meeting and let them know.” Your eyes widen. She was serious. She wanted the world to know you were hers and she was yours. Years of wanting to make this woman your everything with a rock in your hand but this? This felt like she wanted to do it. You nodded, wrapping your arm around her, bringing her more into your embrace. 

“Okay. We can do that.” 

Jenna hummed once more, placing her head back onto your bare chest as you leaned over grabbing your phone on the nightstand. Squinting your eyes at the brightness of your phone, multiple notifications of your crew popped on the screen. Clicking on your recent missed call, ringing was heard throughout the room when you placed it on speaker. 

“Yeeeeeeoooo” Jay sang through the phone. 

“Yo, did you guys make it back safe?” there was static but a voice in the background caused you to roll your eyes. 

“Gone head cashapp me that bill will ya? They made about four babies since it's been a good four hours.” Romeo slang out, 

“I told you Jenna was their light.” Joy spoke in the background and a lot of ‘ohhs’ boomed from the phone. You looked down at the girl sending her a warm smile. 

“She was my touch in the dark.” 

[lovelettersforthedamned]

tasm!peter finds your love letter to him that you never gave him because you are too embarrassed to show him

Big Words On A Little Page

--genre: FLUFF, SO MUCH FLUFF.

--pairing: tasm!peter parker x gn!reader

--word count: 0.7k

--warnings: some smooching, fluff, a little bit of anxiety coming from the reader, if you don't like a healthy loving relationship then you'll hate this.

i love this, wait...

--gif credits: @ddlovatosrps

Love came easy for you, but expressing it took time. Peter knew that putting your feelings into words wasn’t straightforward, and he knew that it would take time for you to be completely comfortable with him. So for you, he waited. 

If you asked Peter, he would have no complaints. Peter knew you loved him with every bone in your body, so why do you still feel like you’re not putting in your part? 

Sure, you couldn’t verbally express your feelings for him, but you can write them down. 

While Peter was out protecting the city, you pulled out a piece of lined paper and a red. Once you sat there and started writing, it was hard to stop. You ended up writing two full pages, the words on the paper full of adoration and love for your beloved boyfriend. You didn’t even read what you wrote, you folded the paper and set it in your bedside table’s drawer, hidden and safe. 

Once you put the letters in the drawer, you forgot about them. Life got busy, and two pieces of paper were the last thing on your mind. “Pete? Can you get my chapstick, the peppermint one,” you yell out from the couch, the book in your hand too riveting for you to get up. 

Peter walks past you and heads towards your shared bedroom, and after rummaging through some drawers, he finds himself stumped on where it was, “I can’t find it, bug!”

Without a second thought, you yell back, “It’s in my bedside drawer!”

Pulling open the drawer, Peter finally lays his eyes on the god-forsaken peppermint chapstick he’s been searching for, along with a folded piece of paper with red ink bleeding through its fibers. This seems to catch his eye, especially the top of it, reading ‘Dear Peter,’. A part of him felt guilty as he grabbed it and opened it up, but it was addressed to him, right? 

His eyes scanned through your writing, his eyes welling up with tears the farther he read. He couldn’t deny that a big stupid smile was spread across his face, and a warm blush fluttered onto his cheeks. 

Finishing the letter, he’s speechless, and he couldn’t be more overwhelmed with love. Walking back out to you in the living room, he finds you still nose-deep in your book, still unaware of his presence. Moving to stand directly next to you, you finally see him in the corner of your eye, “Thank you so much babe, you will not believe what happened in this book–.” As you give him your full attention, your eyes dart between his face and the papers in his hand. “Peter, I was going to give you those I promise–,” your sentence was cut short by his lips meeting yours. The warmth of his cheeks radiated onto yours, inviting you to stay here a while. 

Eventually, you both have run out of breath prompting you to pull away, breathless. Peter holds your face in his hands and looks directly into your eyes, the honey brown of his irises putting you in a trance. Although there was silence, you could tell that Peter had something on his mind, giving him time to speak. Reaching up to hold the back of one of his hands, you rub your thumb against the skin there. 

“I love you so much, (Y/N). I’m sorry I read this without asking first, but fuck, I’m so glad I did,” his eyes still not breaking contact with yours. 

All you could do was smile, you were afraid that tears would fall if you spoke. Your heart was pounding in your chest, and Peter could feel it, “You’re stuck with me for as long as you’ll have me, and if this is the last time I receive a love letter from you, I’d die a happy man. As long as you’re here with me, there’s nowhere else I’d rather be, bug.”

A sudden urge of desperation for his touch overwhelmed your senses. Dropping your book, you wrap both of your arms around his neck and pull him onto the couch, nestling your face into the nape of his neck. You two stay there for a while, the sunlight slowly receding as you squeeze Peter a little tighter, grateful for a man who loves you with everything he has. Even if you can’t verbally show it. 

--author's note: HELLOOOO!! sorry guys for the inactivity recently, i was so dead sick two days before christmas, and then christmas happened, and now im back. to those who celebrate, i hope you all had a merry christmas!! nonnie, thank you so much for the ask!! THIS IS A REMINDER THAT YOU CAN STILL SEND IN REGULAR ASKS BAES!!! don't forget to like, comment, and reblog to support this blog. ok, ily bye<3333