#but i dont think this was what she deserved from her soul mate

[bonny-kookoo]

Jungkook:

Monochrome 🔞 [Teaser]

In which Jungkook has never fallen in love before- not until you came along, at least.

Tags/Warnings: Hybrid AU, Munchkin Cat!Reader, Siberian Tiger!Jungkook, DDLG aspects, Daddy!Jungkook, height difference/Size kink, petplay (in a way?), strangers to lovers, mild Angst, Fluff!, quiet!Reader, Model!Kook, mentions of death & grieving, romance, smut, protected sex, Dom! Kook, manhandling, strength kink, biting, hybrid behavior (scenting, marking, grooming and other)

Length: approx. 4-5k

♥━━━━━━━━━━•.♡.•━━━━━━━━━━━━♥

He's still irritated. You don't deserve any of this.

He hopes he might be able to get the paperwork signed- and you out of this place as soon as he can. There's technically nothing speaking against it after all; he's a level 2 at the end of the day, his hybrid side a lot less dominant than in someone like you. And while it's made him feel like an outcast for a long time, feeling like he doesn't belong neither here nor there- looking at you now, his feelings have changed.

He feels glad, for the first time, that he's the way he is.

"If she's getting too much you can just tell her to go play or something." One of the workers tells him as she'd spotted him with you still somewhat laying on his thigh, his hand comfortably resting on your shoulder while you play with his rings on his other hand. "She tends to get clingy with anybody who pays attention to her." She snickers, but he shakes his head.

"No, it's really fine." He denies her, well aware that she's been eyeing him ever since he'd gotten here the first day, and he can't hold back on his next words. "I actually think she's cute." He smiles down at you, and your cat-ears twitch at that before you look up at him, making him laugh.

"I mean.. I guess? Maybe it's a hybrid thing that you like her." She shrugs, crossing her arms. "But she's gotta move soon, your manager told me they wanna take some more shots." She says with more bite to her tone now- and in a way, it satisfies Jungkook.

He lets you rest on him for a little longer- until he pulls out something from his bag, brown paperbag containing a baked treat you know all too well.

He brings it every time, ever since you've told him you like it, after all.

"Nuh-ah." He chuckles when you instantly sit up and reach for it, turning his body a little towards you on the bench before he holds out the donut, testing the waters. And for his own amusement.

And much to his said amusement, you do exactly what he hoped you would.

Without thinking much it seems like, you lean forward to take a bite out of the sweet treat while he's still holding it- and he can't help but smile at the scene. You're so unaware of your own appeal, completely oblivious to how charming you are, and in a way, it makes him upset. You really are just a soft soul being used and nothing else- and he just feels like he's got to offer his protection.

Because you seserve it- and vecause he wants to be that protector.

Mostly because the connection you both have to one another is undeniable. Mates are an odd thing; but they're a real thing at the end of the day, and it's clear now that he's found his own in you.

You seem to have a moment of realization after the second bite, ears turning before your head follows as a worker says something Jungkook himself doesn't quite catch- but he knows he doesn't like it. "Hey- I'm over here." He tells you, and you look at him with a more shy expression now, almost embarrassed- letting go of his wrist as you sit back down on the bench, visibly uncomfortable. "Dont listen to them. I'm more interesting, am I not?" He teases to get your attention back, reaching out to wipe a crumb from the corner of your lips, making you smile a bit shyly to yourself.

You're so easy to catch.

"Why.." you start, seemingly thinking about your words. You do that a lot, he noticed- you either don't talk at all, or very quietly, and in a way, he's not sure if that's been something they pushed onto you in the carecenter here, or if you've always been this way. He wants to find out, that's for sure. "Why do you.. like me?" You ask, visibly unsatisfied with how you formulated that sentence. It's another proof of your difference in hybrid level compared to Jungkook.

But no matter, he will learn to understand you, until he no longer needs you to speak at all.

Jungkook simply shrugs at your question. "Maybe a mate thing. Maybe just because I like you." He answers. "I don't need to have a reason for it, though. You're a very sweet person, very likable." He tells you before he breaks off another piece of the donut, holding it out. "Now come on. Be a good girl and finish up, alright?" He teasingly tells you as he eats the other leftover piece himself, just to pull yours away from you when you reach out for it with your hand. "Nop." He chuckles, making you glare at him, tail swiping behind you from side to side, and he can't help but laugh at the scene, head thrown back.

Adorable.

Until he feels your lips brush against the tips of his fingers as you snatch the last piece of your treat from him, his gaze immediately back on you as you watch his reaction with a more challenging expression, and he can't help but be intrigued.

"I feel like it'll be a good idea. Jungkook!" His manager smiles, walking up to you both. "You've got her there already, perfect. We'd like to unclude her in the next few shots tomorrow, see how she does." He tells him, and Jungkook looks at you who seems visibly uncertain.

"You okay with that?" Jungkook asks, and you look at the camera set up close by with an almost fearful expression. "Dont worry. They'll tell you what to do, and I'll help as well. Or is it something else?" He asks, making you move to sit on the bench more properly, feet almost touching the floor, but not quite. He realizes what might be the problem when a staff member accidentally let's a brush fall to the floor, your ears instantly flattening for a short second from the harsh sound. "Ah- does the camera sound scare you?" And you nod at that, making his manager laugh a bit.

"Oh no, don't be scared! It's totally normal. Maybe Jungkook can show you how it works?" He says, before looking over at the careworker close to him. "My son has a hybrid too- he used to hate the sound of the microwave too until my son explained to him how it functioned." He chuckles. Jungkook remembers that. Namjoon and Jimin are an odd couple, but weirdly, they also fit perfectly.

"I don't think she'll understand that, but you can try." The careworker shrugs disinterested, clearly upset at Jungkooks lack of interest in her.

"Come on, let's have a look then." Jungkook simply tells you with no thought wasted on the woman, as he walks to the big cameras with you, Taehyung already looking your way. "Hey, can you maybe explain to her why the camera makes that noise?" Jungkook asks his friend, who nods at you.

"Its pretty loud, isn't it?" He tells you, and you nod- standing on the tips of your toes to try and see through the lens, but to no use. "You're so short!" Taehyung chuckles, and Jungkook can't help but be amused too.

"Hm, here, you can step on that." He offers, sliding an upside-down thick plastic bucket close to you to stand on; his hands instinctively on your body yo steady you as you step onto the container.

"Alright, so.." Taehyung starts to explain the camera to you, and Jungkook can't help but be thankful that his friend is clearly aware of the fact that you're not a stupid child- the photographer never oversimplifying anything, simply telling you the general mechanics to make sure you understand what's happening, that nothing is breaking or could cause any harm. And then the camera makes its distinctive sound.

Your ears still flatten for a split second, but your body makes no sign of being scared or surprised any longer. It worked.

"I can't turn it off, sadly. It's a mechanical sound, so there's no way around it." Taehyung shrugs towards his friend, and Jungkook simply nods.

"It'll be fine." Jungkook says, helping you down from the bucket as the manager says his goodbyes to the first staff. It reminds Jungkook of something in that moment he almost forgot. "Alright, go get your stuff now. I'll go change and then we can go, alright?" He asks, and you seem confused- until you seem to realize.

You're going home with him today. And tomorrow. And the day after, too.

Jungkook can't help but laugh when you dash off into the hallway to get your things, as he himself goes to change himself. He really hopes you'll like it at his place, hopefully enough to decide to stay- and if you do, all he needs are your papers signed and approved. He hates the way the system works, but he also understands it somewhat.

Even though it's clear that not everything goes exactly as it's meant to be.

But once you're with him, once he's got you safe, there will be no more of this. He'll make sure the world gets to know what's going on behind closed doors, having already discussed the plans with his management after all- and he can't deny his anticipation.

He can't wait to see that man lose all he's never even deserved to have in the first place.

But before he can even think any further about those things happening, you're pulling on the hem of his sweater to gain his attention, already dressed in scarf and coat and those fluffy boots he'd bought you yesterday- a lot better quality than those worn down things they'd given you. You deserve to be spoiled in his opinion, not tossed aside like you've been for God knows how many years- and he'll make sure that'll happen.

"Come on." He smiles at you, taking your bag for you as he walks outside the building to his car, opening the door. "We can sleep early or have some food delivered- what would you like?" He asks, getting into the car after you, the driver closing the door after him as he's finally seated next to you, seat belts clicking into place for the both of you.

You shrug as an answer, and he laughs, watching as you yawn, the tiger teasingly pointing his finger into your mouth- but he doesn't expect you to close it so quickly. While you don't bite down on it (at least not hard enough to ever really hurt), he still can't help but be affected by it. Especially when he pushes down on your lower lip, your tongue jokingly licking the tip of his finger, making him smirk at you.

Behind your innocent facade does slumber a tiny little tiger too, in a way, it seems like.

And he honestly doesn't know if he can handle having you around him like this for much longer, while not doing anything about it at all. He's already almost kissed you yesterday, and by now he knows you feel just as attracted to him as he does to you.

You're mates after all. Similar age. Technically in the same hybrid group. Nothing speaks against it.

And yet he's got to be careful. He doesn't want to end up breaking your heart if things don't go as expected- he'd hate leaving you devastated. And yet still he feels as if he'd die soon if he doesn't at least get to feel your lips on his- there's nothing wrong with at least a kiss, right? Maybe just a little further than that- his couch his comfortable after all, and he for sure won't be able to withstand the temptation of at least holding you close with you staying with him tonight. "Do you want to sleep in my bed tonight? I can take the couch, no problems." He asks you to distract himself, ground himself again and get his mind off of things-

But then you visibly pout, ears drooping down a little as you look at him almost disappointed.

"Not.. with you?" You mumble, and his gaze focuses on you again, pupils dilated as he swallows thickly.

"I mean, I won't say no." He tells you, eyes never leaving yours. "But I probably should." He says, making you tilt your head in question. Though in your eyes, in the way they sparkle mischievously, he knows you're very much aware of the implications.

"You won't." You simply smile next to him, legs stretching and tail swaying from side to side, and all he can think of is brat. There's no trace of the shy little cat left it seems like right now, as you look at him all confident and almost challenging.

And yet, he can't disagree.

He won't say no.

♥━━━━━━━━━━•.♡.•━━━━━━━━━━━━♥

[theshadowsingersraven]

I don't think it's running away versus deciding who will be appreciative enough to see her bloom into her full potential/deserves to see that. And I think she'll have an easier time doing so away from the people who keep underestimating her. It'll be removed from any potential bias internally from Elain's end.

I don't see what pitfalls Lucien has that's comparable to the Inner Circle? Lucien has credited her with killing the King of Hybern, he advocated for her to get out of the house during her depressive state, and he's respected her space and boundaries since their bond snapped. He brings her presents at Solstice, which reads to me, as a way for her to know he doesn't hold any hesitance or uncertainty against her. Regardless of the result of their bond, he seems to be the most respectful of her and her choices.

And yes, Rhys is manipulative and puts a stop to their interaction. But Elain gave back the necklace, and for all we know, she may have heard Azriel's conversation with Rhys. She may not want Azriel anymore for all we know, and that could be the beginning of her arc. Everything after the Bonus Chapter, and what caused her to return the necklace.

When I say Feyre was better off in Spring, I mean compared to when she was in the human lands in the hovel with her family. Apologies if that wasn't obvious. Of course, she's going to do better in a place where she's provided for. She wasn't provided for in the human lands, she was the provider. Feyre thrives in the Night Court, as that is her home, but my point is that she also thought that the court she started in was going to be her home, and it wasn't. While it might not be the same set of circumstances, I wouldn't be surprised if Elain experiences something similar.

I don't see how it's a repeat when the circumstances are significantly different. Feyre was manipulated into going to Spring because of the curse put in place by Amarantha that Tamlin was tasked with breaking to save all of Prythian. Internally, I picture this as Elain realizing that the only person truly invested in getting what she wants is her, and that finding her own way is the next step for her. Getting away from the familiar and then seeing who she is without the current comforts of her surroundings and discovering who she truly is and what she truly wants.

How she lands on Spring could be a number of different circumstances. Perhaps she decides she wants to see the human lands more but ends up staying in Spring for the time she's away from the Night Court. Perhaps she ends up in Day or Dawn first, or she wants to journey through all the Courts and ends up being in Spring the longest. Spring doesn't necessarily have to be the intended destination, as much as I personally see that being a perfectly valid potential destination.

I just don't see what manipulation would Elain be dealing with at the hands of Tamlin and Lucien, personally, for it to be a re-run of ACOTAR. I guess maybe Lucien could be urging her not to reject him, but given that he was going to ask Rhys how he handled his mate being engaged to marry someone else, he seems to prioritize what she wants.

Either way, it doesn't have to be a permanent removal as much as an exploration of who she is unbound and untethered. Elain can always go back. Other High Lords visit the Night Court relatively frequently, at minimum on holidays. Or her family can visit her. Winnowing is a thing, after all.

Now here is where I have to vehemently disagree with you. "Feyre, Rhys, they dont seem to be taking what Elain says she wants for herself very seriously. So again, to see Elain simply capitulate to what they’ve been telling her all along run is good for her (go run along with your mate)- it doesn’t make sense. At all."

Feyre has only encouraged Elain to speak to Lucien, which, in all honesty, in a universe where magic can tie your soul irrevocably to another person and neither of you have a say in that initial instance happening--yeah, she should. Elain should speak to Lucien, full stop. The bond affects both their futures, and both of their lives will be on hold until it is resolved. Elain is the one uncomfortable, so Lucien is giving her space and putting the proverbial ball in her court. Elain and Lucien owe each other at least a conversation about the future, and Lucien is respecting the boundaries she has put in place thus far. It's on Elain to change that.

Feyre has repeatedly questioned why Azriel and Elain aren't mates and Rhys has said that Elain can reject the bond and she would be supported if she did so. Rhys interfered also because Azriel, with his knowledge about the mating bond and its cultural significance, should also know that Elain should speak to Lucien, full stop, and resolve that issue before starting something with anyone else, Azriel or otherwise. Rhys was chastising Azriel more than anyone else, especially for the time and place of it all, in my opinion.

If Elain had expressed interest in rejecting the bond, or Azriel had utilized his spy network or the library he lives above to gather options for Elain to find a method to reject the bond, even just for her own sake, regardless of their romantic dynamic, then I think Rhys would likely have a totally different reaction. Because it would show an actual path to a decision on Elain's part, or at least a readily available option. Kissing Azriel is not necessarily a guaranteed decision as much as it could be a distraction. If Elain truly wants to be with Azriel, mating bond be damned, then we have to wait and see. We don't know that yet for sure. And I'm sure Rhys also doesn't know that and has a responsibility to avoid unnecessary political fallout. There's more than just underestimating Elain or manipulative tendencies in this particular example, it's also about the multitude of Courts a discovered dalliance could affect. While I also think he's underestimating Lucien and his ability to allow Elain her space and wants and not hold it against her, because I don't see Lucien ever invoking the Blood Duel, I at least acknowledge that Rhys has to consider all options as a High Lord.

If Elain fights for what she wants, assuming that's Azriel, cool. If she gets it, cool. But I don't see a story that's any less intriguing or investing in which Elain says, "You want me to make a decision? Fine. I'm deciding to figure out what I truly want, and none of you get a say in that. And you'll see who I am at the end of that journey if I decide you get to."

And I think that journey is most easily accomplished with her separate from the NC, even if it's only temporarily.

something that irritates me to no end is when people try to place Elain in spring court. Whichever ship, Elain needs to be in one of the solar courts because they have seasons, Elain would be miserable in eternal spring because she wouldn’t be able to garden. I think it would unnerve her that there was no lifecycle to the plants, no death and rebirth.

Just because she smells like spring doesn’t mean she would be happy there.

Anyways thanks for coming to my Ted Talk

[separatist-apologist]

I think I started to hate cassian after deleted chapter. Before that I just disliked him. He doesn’t act like a mate he was sadistic to nesta just because she slept with anyone but him. Which is hypocritical because he and mor basically rub their connection in her face. Not to mention his POV was pure lust I didn’t see love at all. Hell at end he doesn’t want to do official mating ceremony and seems embarrassed of her. I can get behind a shit person ( like cruel prince) but cassian I can never because he took pleasure in being sadistic to the max. He even acted like he was going to attack her over her talking about rhys. Nesta’s self respect vanished in book she would of slept with a village just to spite him not fall him his lap

Oof, it really is a no-Cassian appreciation day. I agree, though. I genuinely think Cassian did not like Nesta but DID like the mating bond. Or was compelled to be with her because of it. His POV is so telling because at times he does seem to care if she's miserable...but never enough to like...confess that he loves her. When she's taken by the bog creature (i forget what it's called), he has a moment of panic where he's like, if she's dead I don't know what I'll do but he doesn't follow that up with, "because I'm so in love with her I'd die without her" and it gives the sense that it's the bond driving him and not his personal feelings.

I said it before but I'll say it again. ACOSF definitely made it seem like Cassian did not think Nesta was worthy of him, and "getting" the high born lady as the low born bastard (after dragging her down to his perceived level) was part of what he enjoyed. I think Cassian enjoyed getting Eris back by getting the woman Eris wanted because Eris kept making Cassian feel stupid (which, was a lot of Cassian's own insecurities. I don't think Eris was trying very hard to make Cassian look dumb, Eris was just...treating Cassian like he would have treated ANYONE representing their High Lords political agenda and Cassian, who has his own insecurities, projected that onto everyone around him. Like imagine if Cassian had just shrugged like, okay and? and just met Eris where he was. Eris would have still been Eris of course but it would have rolled off Cassian's back).

The hiking scene is the big no for me. He doesn't speak to her for days??? He's a 500 year old athlete that doesn't recognize the signs of exhaustion? Doesn't care if she doesn't eat/drink? Makes her, untrained, carry their heavy pack? And then when she breaks down he's like, "me, my trauma, you belong to me."

The bad outweighs his moments of sweetness and the mating scene, where he screaming at her in public to acknowledge their bond while she's desperately trying to make him understand how she's afraid to because it's her last shred of humanity stripped away is just...no.

[njeancastro316]

Captive

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is what happens when one of your tumblr sisters @moon-ascendant teases you with a picture of Daniel Gillies as Wing commander Hayes from Occupation Rainfall just to show you his hands and active the heck of the hand kink 🤤🥵 while chatting. Love ya! I have not watch the movie. I’m just going from the synopsis of the story.

English is not my first language.🤷🏻‍♀️

Bolds thoughts: sorry that’s my style of writing

Warnings SMUT like real SMUT complete SMUT be freaking gentle this was torturous to write. Lord knows I love to read them but writing them is a completely different thing entirely. So if you’re younger that 18 please look away my darlings.

Kudos to the gif creator , that giff was used for the facial expressions and the yummy eye FUCK Vibes Hayes gives the female reader.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/N couldn’t think of a worse situation . At the moment she was held captive in an Australian military facility, underground in a secret lab where gruesome experiments were done to the alien invaders. She led a mission to free the captives and ended up being one. She was stripped and left in nothing but her underwear her hands were tied and her arms were up placed on some sort of a butchers hook , behind her a concrete wall. Tired and beaten up she waited for the commander of the facility . Since she didn’t talk to the officers they summoned the man himself to whom they referred as the beast. She was anxious but not scared . Her arms hurt from the uncomfortable position they were placed in .

Then footsteps could be heard from the corridor. The comander was close , coming to interrogate her and possible torture her. She would not give the wanker the satisfaction of making her talk , she’d rather die. Beeping sounds were heard and her breath hitched on her throat as the door whooshed open. In came the one person she never in a million years expected to see. So this was their leader Special Wing Comander Hayes .They had history. ‘Bugger’ she thought . Hayes brown eyes locked on hers and spoke to the rest of the men in the room. “Leave us”.

“But sir she’s dangerous” the soldier interrupted . Big mistake Hayes gun was out in a flash hitting the man with it on his face blood splattering everywhere from the soldiers nose.

“If I can’t control this little sheila then perhaps I do deserve to die. Now fuck off”. He went to the control console shutting the monitors down. Once the soldiers were gone he turned to Y/N and by god he had never look more handsome . This man made the uniform look like a sin she desperately wanted to commit. “My Ohhh my Y/N” he started. “Fancy that ... what are the odds of me finding you here of all places”.

“Fuck off Hayes”.

“Tchhh tchhh tchh”he reprimanded with his tongue. “Language mate , I see something’s never changed” he smirked. “Now listen very carefully baby . This could go either fairly easy where you tell me who’s leading the resistance and what is their location? Or things could get ugly up to where I have to get it out of you by any means necessary and we both know that I don’t want to do that, not to you luv. So what do ya reckon eh? , come on talk to me”. He stood in front of her as her chest heaved frustrated.

“I’m not talking Hayes. Do what you have to I’m not a traitor and a coward like you”! She shouted.

His hand found her neck swiftly and gave her a hard squeeze “You wound me mate” . “Look whose talking about traitors THEY invaded US , THEY are killing US why do you help THEM ? he asked upset squeezing a little making her harder for her to breathe then releasing his hold a bit enough for Y/N to catch her breath.

“Not all of them are bad , what you are doing here is wrong , there has to be another way to defeat them . Not like this Hayes please listen to me I” she spoke while taking gulps of much needed oxygen.

“You can what ? Help me? My duty is to my country and if I have to torture and kill the lot of them bastards he paused I will”. “I’ll ask one last time luv tell me who’s your leader? Don’t make me hurt you”. He ran his gun over from her cheek to her breasts . She recoiled.

“Fuck you”! Spitting to the ground disrespecting him.

“Fuck me ? ... Fuck me?!” Hayes snapped he pressed her to the wall with his body . The hand on her neck moved to her dark locks, his long fingers tangling on her tresses pulling her head back hard while his gun pressed to the underside of her left breast. “You want to try that again luv? , I’m going to give you one last chance”. He snarled. Y/N remembered what those big calloused hands could do as he jabbed his gun to her side again and pulled her hair simultaneously earning him a moan not from pain or discomfort but from lust.

“Is this ... he paused “is this turning you on mate?” He smirked

“Hayes let me go ... I don’t have the information you seek Please .. please I” she gasped her panties were gone. His gun disappeared and soon his fingers were at her core .

“God”! She moaned “Hayes please”.

‘Fuck this interrogation’ he thought he’d missed her and she was here vulnerable and ready for him to take her to heaven. There was something about having her like this arms up hands tied that he could not resist. He sped the movement of his fingers making Y/Ns eyes rolled back into her head. ‘Fuck the mission he’s mine’ she was close. Suddenly her vision blurred and white appeared before her eyes as she came on his fingers her body shaking violently. He brought his fingers to his mouth and licked them clean ‘Fucking delicious baby’ he ran his tongue through his lips before taking her mouth with his own. His slippery tongue fought with her for dominance eventually winning. Y/N threw her head back hissing as his lips found her breasts . His beard scratched her light sensitive skin as he took a nipple in his mouth and suckled.

“Untie me” she begged .

“No”

“Please let me touch you”

He almost gave in ... almost “No” making her growl and curse pulling at her bindings.

Y/N heard his zipper come undone making her look down to his trousers . She had never been so glad to hear that sound. She looked up at him and the look on his face made her cum right then and there. He was so intense.

With little effort he grabbed her by the back of her thighs and hoisted her up against his waist . His length was warm and hard ready to take her. Y/N wrapped her legs around him and leaned forward to kiss him. He sighed into the kiss. He could feel her trembling with need as his fingers greazed her lower back , his tongue intertwining with hers, relishing in her sweet taste. He couldn’t wait any longer and with a hard thrust he swallowed her moan. He was finally in and it was blissful. Hayes set a fast and brutal pace hammering her against the wall and Y/N enjoyed every single second of it. He pulled her hands from the hook and place them behind his neck . She met his thrusts pressing her forehead against his as they panted into each other’s mouths. “Hayes”... Y/N whimpered he knew she was close so he lowered his hand to her core again and started to rub her clit. She moaned into his ear as her thrusts became desperate trying to keep up with him but failing .With a few more movements of his hips she screamed his name for the whole facility to hear . Feeling her walls convulsing around him sent the wing comander over the edge whispering her name fervently over and over again. Coming down from his high he pulled out slowly hissing in the process. “Sensitive comander”? Y/N whispered making him chuckle. “Something like that mate” he took her arms off from around his neck and looking into one of his pockets he produced a knife. “What are you doing”?! She got anxious. “Hush now lass” he cut off her bindings he steadied her .“Get dressed and go I’ll cover ya”. Y/N’s eyes widened “Come with me Hayes”. “No luv I’m into this way to deep , I’ve made my bed no way I’ll back out now” .He grabbed her face and brought his lips to hers one last time. Once dressed she turned to leave when he held her hand .

“What?”

“Take my gun” he put the firearm on her hands.

“You cannot give me this , I can’t” her eyes full of tears.

“You have to and make it believable” he nodded.

“You can’t be serious Hayes ...no” she looked at him refusing to do what he commanded .

“Now my luv you’ll have a window of 60 seconds before I tripped the alarm. Do you understand?”

“Y/N”! he shouted .

“Bugger” she said angry.

“For what is worth... I love you” he gave her a small smile.

“See ya comander” she said before hitting him with his gun on the face cutting his right eyebrow open and aiming at his arm shooting on the forearm.

“You bitch!! ... Fuck”!

“I love you too”she ran from the room hoping she could find the exit before he tripped the alarm.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There you go a little fluffy towards the end. 😁 Please my smut writing needs some serious refinement but hell I did it weeee!!🎉🎉. I don’t know what happens or have seen Occupation Rainfall , I just couldn’t resist Daniel in a uniform 🤤🥵. I tried to keep the Australian in it lol, I dont know anyone from there so I apologize in advance 🤦🏻‍♀️. I hope you enjoy. Like , reblog , leave coments. I adore them. Toodles until next time my darlings.

@hellotvshowtrash @moon-ascendant @moon-child-writer @multifandom-girlie @eternityunicorn @elejahfanfic @mikaelson-emma @dumble-daddy @nikmikaelsonswife @lady-salvatore @soul-revoir @maldita-world @satedbond @xxwritemeastoryxx @elijahs-wife @lokis-favorite-follower @petrova-banz @umaficwriter @raemikaelson @ronniemikaelson

[angelathewitch]

Okay I just finished the ACOTAR series for the first time and I have so many thoughts so I'm gonna write them down.

Also I have not looked at any fan theories or been a part of this fandom very much so all these headcannons are straight from the noggin:

Literally what the fuck is tamlin doing.

Okay getting this out of the way cause its a hot topic. Azriel is my baby I love him but

I would have mixed feelings about him being with both gwyn and Elaine. I love the idea of Elaine being azriels sunshine he deserves light in his life (also their scene in ACOSF had me ejdjbdksks) but also all three bat boys being with all 3 sisters rubs me the wrong way idk.

Gwyn is amazing because she's a badass bitch and if azriel doesn't snatch that up I will. I feel like azriel almost gets bulldozed over by the other bat boys (like he will do the dirty work only because he feels inferior) And I want gwyn to help him stand up for himself.

Gwyn is an adult jfc. I'd be more worried about her trauma.

I am totally a elucien shipper I'm SORRY lucien deserves the world

But at the same time I would totally understand if Elaine couldn't forgive him for his involvement in the cauldron business. That shit was wack. I just want this relationship to be the biggest, most "period drama esqe" slowburn.

I have very mixed feelings about lucien. On one hand lucien has never had a home and when tamlin took him in I can see how that loyalty blurred the lines of right and wrong. But at the same time lucien messed up MANY times where the archeon sisters are concerned.

Nesta deserved her kick in the ass because it was needed. She did not deserve everyone to be a little bitch to her. It felt like feyre was the only one who wanted her rehabbed for nestas sake. I definitely would have preferred Nesta to hit rock bottom and choose recovery for herself (cause alcoholism and things can only be truly solved through self help) Everyone else was uncharacteristically nonempathetic. Idk how Cassian could be okay with her treatment after they mated.

I'm still digesting Rhys and nestas relationship. I like that they don't like each other for most of ACOSF. Nestas reasons for treating feyre poorly are valid, but not excuses. The feyre, Nesta, and rhys relationship thing is weird cause I see all sides. I need more feyre and Nesta bonding they always get interrupted.

I HATE what SJM did to Mors character. What the fuck is up with mor not liking Nesta. Maybe we will get an explanation in the next book but I feel like mor was set up to be a great LGBT character with himbo allies but SJM just dropped her off a cliff. Big mad.

However I do want eris and mor to end up together. Not necessarily romantically, but I want them to have it out and I want eris to support mor. Kinda want them to be mates. Kinda want eris to be gay as well. Kinda want them to get married and them have consorts.

WHY does everyone treat feyre like a porcelain doll when the IC has more collective trauma than anyone else in this universe. Don't get me wrong I'm all about the hurt/comfort but it was so inconsistently written LOL. When the IC was telling their stories the first night they met and then feyre told hers I cackled like sorry but she is a baby

Rhys's trauma is just as recent as feyres... yeah he's a lot older and seasoned but oh my GOD he was consistently assaulted for 49 years. Feyre does very little to comfort him. Idk I feel like it was SO glossed over.

Like in ACOWAR feyre admits that amaranthas hatred wasn't personal it was general, unlike Tamlins hatred. But amarantha and rhys had multiple personal vendettas against each other. Like his amarantha is vaguely feyres tamlin. Rhys didn't even get to kill amarantha. His trauma is untapped. Rhys is the main character feyre is the love interest idc

Idk what yall say rhys is my baby my lovebug my everything. He's got his flaws but you can't love Nesta and hate him at the same time without being a lil hypocritical

But he's fucked in the head for thinking he was justified in drugging feyre every night for 2 months. Almost more mad about that than the SA (I dont really blame Rhys since it is not cannon to me. SJM just messed up 😌 it was so out of character) did he ever really apologize for that??

ALSO I know smj wanted to write like #consentking but half of what he allowed was so unnecessarily dangerous (like the first AND second weaver encounter- if my SO ran off in the middle of a battle to track down a mysterious creature when the task could have been done after the battle I would have be livid. Mor was justified in being mad.)

I'm so mad rhys didn't flatten tamlin during the high lord meeting. Either it will happen in the future or I will burn these books.

THE BAT BOYS HAVE CONNONICALLY BEEN IN THE SAME ROOM WHILE HAVING SEX. the foursomes in my head gets clearer by the day

I HATE the fact that rhys almost had an existential crisis over feyre being so young when she found her mate and not having "lived" and THEN GETS HER PREGNANT??? Are you kidding me. I'm so mad. I don't wanna deal with babies. I hate babies.

But I DO have a fun headcannon that since the bone carver is a death-god or whatever he KNEW nyx wouldn't survive and that is why he appeared as him. Also when the bone carver offered to take feyres first born in exchange for help rather than the oroboughs I think that was also foreshadowing. The only reason nyx survived was because of Nesta and the bone carver had trouble seeing the cauldron.

((Maybe nyx should have died during the birth idk))

Literally I would have enjoyed ACOSF if instead of the pregnancy feyre was busy looking for bryaxis. Literally what happened to him. Wtf

I know the plot armor is crazy thick around the IC but it would have been nice if one of them died. Well, not nice, but more believable. Maybe thats why nyx should have died. Lol I need therapy.

FREAKING HEADCANNON: the archeon sisters are partially fae. Their mom was definitely a descendant and that's why all three sisters have mates. It was hinted that the sisters had mated because they were powerful and cauldron made but Cassian and rhys could feel the pull before the sisters were turned.

Tarquin is the hottest high lord

The whole blood rite thing was stupid. I would have loved if it was spread out over a longer period of time but it was so unrealistic

You know we all love a good #girlboss🤢 moment but the whole valkarie thing seemed 1. Out of no where 2. Really quickly forced (ACOSF should have been like 2 books) 3. If emerie and mor get together life=complete

The inner circle and ther archeon sisters would not get along if they weren't mated to like 50% of the gang

They're too whiny

It's so weird that the mating bond can only be felt by guys??? Lol wut

Okay I know this is a complicated subject but having LGBTs in a universe with mates based in evolutionary advantage seems more homophobic than having a universe without LGBTs LOL. Like their connection can't be as deep cause they can't procreate?? I did like that SJM made up for it a little by saying not all mates are complementary souls.

Hybern was so powerful and for WHAT. I don't understand

Vassa, lucien, and jurian being a trio is so weird 😐

I WANT A NOVELLA ON THE STORY OF AMREN AND VARIAN. They are my otp. If anyone has made it this far and knows of some good amren and varian fanart pls let me know

Okay that is all for now thank you if you read down to here xoxo gossip girl.

P. S. Also I am starting throne of glass and am having a hard time getting into it. Can anyone vouch for this series please I'm conflicted.

Edit: omg I was zooted when I wrote this and didn't realize my phone autocorrected cassian to Caspian RIP

[arthurflecksgirl]

Reader finds out she`s pregnant with Arthur`s child

@jaraysha1121 requested this one! Thank you so much for the lovely request!!! I really, really, really hope you will like the result :)

Arthur humming quietly into your ear was the perfect way to wake up in the morning. Smelling his hair, that felt tickelish into your face while he kissed you awake was. You just wished that all of this, his bed hair in the morning, him humming oldies in the kitchen while making coffee, his skin on yours at night, would never come to end end.

You have been together for one year now but it felt like you had known him before the beginning of time. Having him in your arms felt like holding the entire universe in your hands. Like anything was possible and there was nothing that you weren`t able to face together. Arthur was your muse, your inspiration. Your proof that no matter how cruel life has been to you, there is still hope to stay gentle at heart and to end up being loved. It was just the same the other way around. You ended up being Arthurs salvation. His soul mate. Everything he ever hoped for and daydreamed about. You and him. It was just fate.

"Hey Y/N. I made you some tea. I hope you feel better this morning? I noticed you couldnt find sleep tonight?" He handed you the cup "Careful, its still very hot." You took a careful sip and put it back on the table. " Arthur crawled back on the couch with you, so you took him under the green blanket. He softly kissed your cheek.

"Um...yeah well I feel better now" you lied.  You didnt wanted him to be worried about you, since Arthur worried about you a lot. Whenever he thought there was the slightest chance for you to get sick or cold or anthing that made you feel uncomforable. He would ask you every five minutes if you already felt better, which was beyond adorable, but still, you didnt wanted him to get worried, because after a while he tended to get nervous and anxious , and that wasnt good for his mental health and insomnia at all. So yo decited to try to hide it from him. But he just knew you so well.

"Are you sure, baby? You seem like there is something wrong? You didnt even ate your fave cookies yesterday. The plate is still full so... I got evidence!" He joked and pulled your nose. "No, I`m fine, Artie, really. I mean.I just woke up beside you. How on earth wouldnt I feel great?" You took another sip of tea.

"Yeah..." Arthur lit himself a cig and stared at the ceiling while his arm was wrapped around you "You know, I just wish we could do this more often. The sleepover.  But its very diffucult to hide you from my mother. I dont know how she would react if she knew that a girl was sleeping in the living room."

You nodded. It was obvious that Arthur loved his mum but he was also afraid to get into a confrontation with her. He would only confront her with anything if there was absolutely no other way to handle it. So you sneaked into his apartment when Penny was already asleep.

"Sooo what if she just wakes up and walks through the living room? She will notice me for sure."

Arthur shook his head while he took a deep drag of his cig "She will not wake up".

"What do you mean?"

"She took some sleeping pills yesterday. Well... I made her do it but...anyway..." he stroke your hair "Dont worry abut that okay? She will still be asleep for the next few hours for sure. And even if she will wake up, she would be so confused, you could just hide under the blanket and she wouldnt notice anything."

"I see... you thought of anything didnt you? I wonder what she would sayif she knew there was a girl on the couch."

Arthur leaned in to kiss your ear "Just think of what she would do if she knew what I did with this girl last night...?!"

You smirked "Yeah that was definitely helping with feeling better."

"So what do you think she would do?"

"She would tell you you`re a naughty boy"

Arthur put the cig in his pink ashtray and  kissed you passionately.

"Yeah...being naughty is fun isnt it?"

You nodded under the sweet pressure of his lips.

You tried to be as quiet as possible, even though he claimed that Penny wouldnt wake up.  She was still in the back of your mind. There was something about the thought of being caught that you really liked.

Arthur checked the clock "Oh. I gotta go to work now. I`m pretty late. " He got up from the couch and grabbed his clown gear. You stood up to change your clothes as you realized how your head was spinning. Arthur didnt noticed. He was distracted by checking his bag.  " We`ll see each other on Monday, right?"

"Yeah, sure. I will visit  when you get home from work. "

Arthur grabbed the keys "Great. I cant wait to see you again, sweetheart. Any plans for today?"

You opened teh door "Yeah I will visit my best friend over the weekend. We`ll be watching movies and stuff."

You both headed down the hallway and got into the elevator "Sounds like fun" Arthur smiled at you with so much love in his eyes. His tiney wrinkles made you want to cover his beautiful face with kisses.

"What?" he asked as he noticed you staring.

"Nothing....its just...I love you so god damn much!"

Arthurs cheeks turned red "Dito!" he said, gently touching your cheek before you said goodbye. You watched him running towards the subway station. He was really late.

Being in the elevator a minute ago made your dizzyness even worse. You closed your eyes for a moment, wondering if you might catched the flu. You felt sick to the stomach for about three days now and it didnt seemed to get any better.  Hopefully it wouldnt ruin the whole weekend. You knew that your best friend bought sweets and cake but you didnt felt like eating anything at all.

Thirty minutes later you arrived. Your best friend welcomed you with the warmest hug. She was the only one who accepted your love to Arthur. Most of your other friends thought he was weird for his laughter and for still living with his mother at the age of 35. You started to realize that some of those people didnt even deserved your friendship, especially they didnt deserved to get to know the wonderful man that Arthur was.

"Hey Y/N ! I`m glad you`re here. I`ve planned something for tonight. You will be excited to hear about it. How is Arthur doing?"

You got out of your jacket and sat down on the couch "He`s doing fine. Thank you for asking. He`s on some new meds and they are much better than the last ones he had."

"I`m happy to hear this. But you kno what his best medicine is? YOU. Imean it. He looks so much healthier since the two of you meet each other on a regular basis."

Hearing those words coming out of her mouth meants the world to you "Thank you so much. I appriciate that. The others dont understand...."

"Pffff" she headed to the kitchen and came back with a huge self made pizza "Dont listen to them. They are idiots. Every single one of them. Arthur is a nice guy and he is good for you. I can see the way you look at each other. There is so much love between you."

"Yeah. I really do love him. More than anything. I think he`s my soulmate."You smiled "I understand him.  And he gets me. We get each other. We dont even have to say anything. Its just....we know. We`re the same. "

"Heyyyyy check this out" she put the huge pizza on the table in front of you "Its self made. i`m kinda proud. We will kill this delicios thing this evening. What do you think?"

Just looking at the food made you feel sick again "Um.....yeah thats....great. It looks delicious"

Your friend put her hand on your forehead "Y/N. You look kinda pale."

"Yeah...I dont feel so well....its been this way for half a week now. I can barely eat something and I feel dizzy at times and just....weird. Like...I dont know my body and mind feel funny and....I dont know....I havent slept for days..." you started crying.

"Ohhh noooo why are you crying? Is there anything going on with Arthur you wouldnt tell me?"

You wiped a tear away "No. No really. He is fine. I`m just very sensitive these days. I`m not sure why.... maybe it was all to much with the others not respecting Arthur as my boyfriend. ...I dont know....Just stressed out emotionally I think.. But I will be fine."

Your friend told you  that you didnt have to eat anything if you dont feel like it, but two hours later you decited to give it a try and grabbed a piece of her selfmade pizza. After one slice you felt so bad you coudlnt hide it from your bestie anymore "Oh my god. I think I gotta go to the bathroom" you hurried up and closed the door behind you.

"Y/N? Are you okay in there?"

"Yeah....kinda....just...I`m just sick to the stomach. I think I catched the flu or something. maybe its better for me to go home. I dont want you to get infected."

Ten minutes later you got back into the living room again. She waited for you with a big grin on her face. Why would she make fun of you feeling sick?

"Feeling better?" the grin still lingering on your lips. It kinda hurt you to see her reaction.

"No. I think I`m gonna go home. I think I have to rest until I see Arthur again on Monday.  I dont want to cancel our date. He is looking forward to it. I`m sorry thatI ruined our weekend before it even started...."

She giggled.

"Why are you laughing? Cant you see I`m feeling like shit?"

She pointed at the empty place beside her "Si down Y/N. And calm down for a second. I dont think that you`re ill at all. You feel sick to the stomach, dizzy and emotionally sensitive.....Think about what it might be."

"I dont know what you are talking about!" you yelled

"Oh I see, currently very emotional with your  reactions."

"Yeah go ahead making fun of me" you replied with a dissappointed look on your face.

"Y/N. You and Arthur I mean....you want to stay together right?"

"Of course we do!"

"You love each other to death?"

"Yeah!"

She clapped her hands "So I think Monday will be even more special when he hears the news!"

"Which news?" you still didnt understood what she was all about.

"Y/N. My dear, you might be pregnant with Arthur`s child!"

The very second you heard her saying this your heart just stopped. You tried to think about the symptoms  but all you could think about was Arthur and how he would react if this was really true. You rubbed your dimples, tried to remember how one of your friends felt like when she got pregnant.  It really could be it.

"Oh my god..." you whispered.

"YES great news. I mean....if you really are this would be great news for you, right? Hopefully...I mean...did you talked about that? You and Arthur?"

Concentrating was hard "We did....I mean....a while ago he told me how much he loves kids and that he always wanted to have a family and .....I mean look at him when he is with kids. he would be a great dad. I know he would. "

"And how do YOU feel about it?" she asked.

"I...I`m not sure....I mean...I want to spent the rest of my life with him and...the thought of being a parent is stil kinda scare, isnt it? But...yeah I think I really want to have a kid with Arthur. He is the only man who ever made me feel this way. Its just overwhelming right now. The thought that it might happen NOW. But yeah...I would be happy about it for sure. " you started to cry. Your best friend hugged you tight "Shhhhhtt . Eighter way it will be good. What do you think about going to the pharmacy and get a test right now? So you dont have to ask yourself that question all day?"

You nodded. Knowing would help. You just had to know if your friend was right.

An hour later you couldnt stop your hands from shaking as you got back to your friends apartment. The pregnancy test in your hand felt surreal. You never did such a test before, so you sat down with her to read everything through.

"Are you ready?" she asked you.

You werent sure. How could anyone ever be ready for something like that? Deep down you knew that there was nothing to be afraid of. The more you thought about it, the more you wanted the test to turn out positive. You just felt deep in your heart that Arthur would be happy,too. There was only a slight chance that he would be too overwhelmed and scared. But then again, who wouldnt be?

"No. I`m not ready" you smiled while you said it out loud.

"But you are smiling! Thats a good thing. Take your time. We can do this tonight if you want."

You got up and headed to the bathroom "No. No. I really want to know now.  So I will have more time to think about how I will tell Arthur on Monday."

"Ha! You`re already talking like you are pregnant. I like that" her face lighted up.

And you realized that this was true. Somehow you suddenly felt like you already knew. Like everything was coming together. You imagined Arthur holding your baby for the first time. Imagined his big puppy eyes while trying to make his kid laugh. You already felt the love he was radiating as a dad. Your eyes started watering when you closed the door behind you. You followed the discriptions of the test and waited.

It wasnt long but it felt like a lifetime.

So many scenarios went through your head. Any possible reaction from Arthur. You checked the watch. It was time to take a look at the result. Your heart was beating fast. You didnt even knew how much you wanted a kid with him until now. You hoped for the test to be positive. So much it would even hurt you if it was not the case. This morning you didnt even thought of being a parent and suddenly it was all you could think about. Arthur as a dad. Arthur as the father of your child. What a wonderful life it would be! Not easy, but wonderful and worth living for.

Your shaky hand grabbed the test with eyes closed. One deep breath in. And another.

Okay.

Now.

Now you will know.

Postive. The test was positive. Arthur and you would be parents soon!

You wished for him to be here with you right now. A brief moment you felt regret for not making the test when he was there with you but anyway, you would make sure to surprise him in the sweetest way!

"Ohhh my god, you were right!" you screamed as you got out of teh bathroom "You were right!!!!"

Your friend ran towards you and held you tight "I knew. I just knew. I am so happy for you. Are you happy? You are feeling good, right? Oh my god!"

"Yeah, I...I am happy. So much happier than I thought I would be. I cant wait to tell Arthur the day after tomorrow. God, I dont even know if I can wait until then. But I have to because....I want the surprise to be perfect. And I gotta figure out how I will tell him the news!"

"You`re going to be a great mum Y/N. I just know. And Arthur is going to be the funniest daddy ever!"

You sat down on teh couch, dizzy but happy at heart "Wow,thats just...a lot to think about!"

Your friend told you to rest and made you a cup of tea to calm your stomach.  You realized that life would never be the same again after the kid would be born. But you wanted it. You wanted it all. With him. And him only.

It was so hard to no tell Arthur when he called you the next day. But you wanted to see his face when you told him. You wanted to feel his arms around you and this wasnt possible through the phone, so you waited for Monday evening.

You made sure that you arrived earlier than he would and put the pregnancy test into an envelope, so he would find it as soon as he checked the box for letters. He always did because his mum was waiting on a letter from Thomas Wayne for months now. Standing in the hallway was torture. You checked your watch at least twenty times until he finally arrived. Arthur was still wearing his clown make up. He carried his green wig and clown shoes in his big bag, looking tired. "Ohhhh honey. I`m so glad to be home. It was a long day at HaHas.  There was a kids birthday. I danced for at least three hours. But it was worth it. You should have seen the little boys face! God. I love making kids happy.....Y/N? Are you okay?"

"Arthur!" you jumped into his arms and felt him with all your senses.  "Yes I`m fine. Just so.....good to see you again and I missed you so much!"

A real smile was visible underneath his big, red fake smile "I`m happy to have you in my arms again,too. I missed you the moment you walked out of the elevator two days ago!"

Arhur grabbed his keys to open the letter box. That was the moment. In less than a minute he would know.

"A letter!" he mumbled "Maybe my mum finally gets what she was waiting for ."  He checked the envelope. "Wait....It says For Arthur....there is no stamp and....this is...your handwriting...?" he looked at you. The confused frown on his face made you want to kiss him so bad.

"Open it, darlin. please!"

Arthurs fingers felt that there was something in it.

"Darling, its not even my birthday." he joked "Did you got me a present?" he reached for what was in there and pulled it out.

Arthurs face froze for a moment. No reaction. Just him staring at the test and the little note that said "Soon we`re going to be a family! "

For a second your heart seemed to stop. Why didnt he say anything? Why wasnt he even moving? Was it bad news for him?

The envelope fell down to his feet as he covered his face with his hands. He was crying.

"A-Arthur? Darling?" you took a step closer to him. And another. Until you were able to put your arm around him. His tiney body was shaking.

"Arthur....please say something.

Seeing him cry now was torture. You were looking forward to this moment until you saw the test result and now he was crying in silence. He didnt even looked at you. His beautiful hands just covered his face while he was sobbing like a little boy.

"Oh Arthur, I thought....I really thought this would make you happy,too?!"

Arthur uncovered his face. His puffy eyes glanced at you with love "Are you kidding me Y/N? Of course I am happy. I was never happier in my whole life! Oh my god. I am....I never felt this way before. We are going to be a family! This is all I ever wanted in life. Thank you for making my dream come true!" Arthur fell into your arms. His head resting on your shouders  as tears of happiness ran down his face.

Now you started crying too.

"Oh god, I`m so glad. So reliefed. You`re going to be the best daddy ever. I love you so much, Artie! So incredibly much."

Arthur kissed you softly on the lips. Traces of his clown make up covered the corner of your mouth.

"You know what? Tomorrow I`m taking a day off and we`ll have a beautiful picnic in the park. Just the two of us. Out on a date to celebrate this! And when we`re back home, I´m going to tell my mum!"

You smiled "Your mum didnt even knew you had a girlfriend. She will be shocked."

"So what? Its our life! And our desicion. We will be looking for a new home anyway."

"Yeah" you wiped a curl out of his face.

"C`mon, honey, lets get in and relax for the night."

Arthur took you by the hand and soon you found yourself all cuddled up on the couch. Arthur on your side. Skin on skin. His breath behind your ear. His hand caressing your belly.

"So you think its going to be a boy or a girl?" he asked you while his fingers gently moved in circles. He lit some candles to make it even cozier for you.

"I dont know" you whispered "I would love a son who looks just like his father."

Arthurs hand on your tummy felt so calming. Like a charm that made your child feel loved.

"And I would love a daughter who is just as precious as her mother."

You smiled.

"I promise I will try my best to be a good dad. I will make our kid laugh as often as possible and teach him or her how to do magic tricks and I´ll dance to make the child feel better. I will try anything. to be.....good enough! I`m gonna take good care of our baby."

"I know you are going to be amazing. Who wouldnt love to have a funny clown as a father?"

Arthur leaned in to kiss you "I promise you, I will find a job as a stand up comedian so we can afford much more than now. I`m gonna make it work. "

"I know we will Arthur. The two....no. The three of us together."

Arthur pulled you even closer to his chest. The warmth of his body lulled you in as you drifted away into sleep. The last thing you`ve heard before your eyes closed was Arthur whispering "Sleep tight, little angel" while he placed his lips on your belly to kiss your child good night.

[hereforthecake]

OK but no seriously I don't think enough of you understand how brilliant Angel and Cordelia's relationship is. So the whole thing with Buffy and Angel is that Buffy brought Angel back from his depression. She was his metaphorical link to humanity, the person who reminded him that people were worth saving. But than they break up. Angel leaves. He gets stuck in a rut. He saves people, not because he believes they deserve to be saved, but so he can save himself from his guilt. But than he meets Doyle. Doyle shows literally shows him that people are worth saving and how much harm is happening in the city. He becomes the heart of the show by literally being his literal link to humanity. But than he dies in episode 9 and the visions pass to Cordelia, and she becomes the heart of the show. And what makes her special is that, she was both. She had the visions literally linking Angel to the helpless and she (like Buffy before her) reminded him why people are worth saving. I dont think it's a coincidence that almost every time someone wants to use a member of AI they always go for her. He needs her. She reminds him of all the good in the world and more than that she tells him that he needs to get off his ass and save it (something Buffy never really did.) There's a reason Cordy was the one to help him in Your Welcome and not Buffy.

In conclusion Cordelia and Angel are soul mates that made each other better and should have ended up together thank you goodnight

[energyanon]

FAQ Energy Readings

I am well aware that I cannot stop anyone when it comes to doing their own readings even if they are not experienced. by now, I hope that you have read this post and are at the very least following the guidelines. If you have done so, I applaud you, thank you for taking this seriously. If you have read the post, and you still want to go ahead i’ve decided to give some background information for you to consider in your readings while you practice. I will not be discussing HOW to do things, as, if you are doing these readings you should know this already, but this is some extra study just so it can help you in them. (If you arent interested in doing ER’s yourself, some of the information in here will give you some insight into your own energy, feel free to read that but otherwise, please do scroll down to where the quotes are, as they help everyone in understanding their own family dynamic/trauma.) I do think it will help everyone. I will continue to add to this with anything that I find would help you make better decisions when conducting a reading.

 1. Before doing readings you need to work on yourself. There are things that can come up in a reading that are extraordinarily triggering, and you will never know that it’s coming up. Sexual abuse, attempted suicide, death.. nothing that wants to come into light gives two shits about you being triggered, and so you need to have done the work to be able to step out and stop without becoming consumed by it. You need to then be able to also have enough strength to close off the reading. If you are too fractured from the trigger in order to do so, you’ve just fucked it up for the person you’re reading. Not good. Do not attempt readings if you have triggers you have not worked on that are either a) going to cause you distress or b) do not allow you to be objective in the reading.

2. Second to this. Being objective in the reading: One of the messages I got last night mentioned that the person who was doing the reading was upset that the person in the reading was not listening to them. You cannot get your own feelings involved. You can merely understand. That’s it. if you are getting upset or feel queezy by what is happening, that is your own energy coming into the reading, and it is not permitted. Get out, shut it down, do not continue. That person does not need your added energy to take care of when they didn’t ask for it themselves, You are only there to observe unless you are doing a constellation in which you are there to guide, but even then you never get your own feelings on the situation involved. 

Eg. In constellations, alot of the time we’re talking about sexual abuse or just straight up physical abuse. It does not help the client if you’re there getting your feelings on those things involved in the constellation and telling them that their father is an absolute shit and he deserves to die for what he did. They are trying to heal their past, that is not helping. You can get the child to say what they want to say eg. “What you did was wrong, it hurt me.” But that is only if they need to be guided to say it, they agree that that is what they want to say, or if they say it organically themselves, which we always try to get them to do first.  and the most important thing

 On this - you can’t say what is good or bad in a reading, it merely IS. The universe always knows what it’s doing, it is putting everyone through trials for them to grow. The very thing that you think is bad, may be the very thing that helps them grow into the best person they can be. You never tell someone what to do, you never force them on a different path if they have not accepted that. If they are on a current lesson, it is not up to you to force them off that lesson before they have learnt from it. 

eg. (and this is NOT what I got at all in the reading, this is just an example) Lets say that Ale IS bad for SS, Lets say shes going to absolutely destroy him. Lets say you SEE that. You are not to do absolutely anything with that situation except accept and understand it with love unless that person has asked you to help them otherwise. You don’t tell them something they don’t already know, you don’t ask a question that says “Seb do you know that Ale is trying to sabotage you?” You don’t do shit. Seb would have been given that lesson in the form of Ale for a reason. Seb’s higher self before coming into this body would have asked for that lesson. You have absolutely 0 authority to tell him to do anything that would halt his learning of this lesson. Every person has the right to their own anatomy, it is your duty to have them keep that right.

Reiterating: If you cannot get out of your own feelings, thoughts and ego - do not do the reading. You need to practice this above all else - how to remain detached. There is no judgement when it comes to these. You enter with love,

3. Bringing love into the reading:

No one deserves a reading regardless of if it is a constellation or just an observation where you are bringing shitty energy with you. You come into the constellation/reading with love and understanding only. If the client doesn’t know what they’re doing, if they dont know how to feel, if they are making the wrong decisions, you understand. I understand how you feel. Do you want to move past it? No? I understand with love, lets move you where YOU want to go then. If they want to move past it that requires a constellation and I know none of you are trained in that DO NOT MOVE THEM. DO NOT TELL THEM HOW OR WHERE THEY SHOULD MOVE UNLESS YOU ARE A CERTIFIED FACILITATOR. No ands if or buts, you are not experienced. Do not move them. Observing the energy, following THEM, never changing the energy FOR them unless asked by them. 

4. If the topic of grief comes up like that of Seb’s reading where they have fallen into a depression, you leave that reading. The only reason i continued was because whatever spirit it was that showed up felt like it came for a reason and made itself known to me in a way that couldn't be denied, and asked for assistance. And I knew how to deal with moving through grief. That barely ever happens, and the energy was good and true so i followed it (I was spooked initially i hate all things ghosts). I didnt offer anything up to Sebastian in that moment than for a way for him to connect with that grief and the person who had died. I could have left him there, but If i can help someone with that grief and the permission has been given, then I will do so. I didn’t do a huge constellation, just a mini one, just got him back in touch and feeling ok again, and he did. Those two had a chat with each other, there was no advice given, it was just one soul giving love to another soul and reminding them how loved they are. It wasnt me saying this to seb, it was me representing the soul who was saying it through me. Do you notice the difference? I’m telling you this only to know what happens, but do not do it yourself. Unless you are experienced with this, because they can also not find comfort in this, they can fall even further down the hole and then you’ve messed up that person. One more time: Don’t touch it, unless you can get them out of it. And you can’t get them out, unless you are experienced. Observe. Only. 

5. It’s important to understand psychology before jumping into someone’s energy. Otherwise you’re understanding only the very basics of said person. There’s many underlying reasons as to why someone is the way that they are. Saying they’re a drug addict will help you very little, but understanding how that addiction came to be in the first place can help you understand and guide them.

Here are some tools to help understand (Reading these does not substitute practicing energy reading, these are only a tool to understand trauma, addiction, and psychology):

It Didn’t Start With You - Mark Wolynn

The Body Keeps Score - Bessel Van Der Kolk

When the Body says No - Gabor Mate

In the realm of Hungry Ghosts - Gabor Mate

If you can’t be bothered to read them (I would advise it if you are doing energy work), here are some of the best sections: 

[Keep in mind when “Addiction” is referenced, it does not always mean drug or alcohol abuse, you can be addicted to anything, from being addicted to companionship, to being addicted to cleaning]

“Perhaps your mother carried a wound from her mother and was unable to give you what she didn’t get. Her parenting skills would be limited by what she did not receive from her parents.”

― Mark Wolynn,

It Didn't Start with You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle

“Cutting off can make you feel free at first, but it’s the false freedom of a childhood defense. Ultimately, it will limit your life experience.”

― Mark Wolynn,

It Didn't Start with You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle

When the family has been brought into its natural order, the individual can leave it behind him while still feeling the strength of his family supporting him. Only when the connection to his family is acknowledged, and the person's responsibility seen clearly and then distributed, can the individual feel unburdened and go about his personal affairs without anything from the past weighing him down or holding him back. - Bert Hellinger (Psychologist, created Family Constellations)

“It is impossible to understand addiction without asking what relief the addict finds, or hopes to find, in the drug or the addictive behaviour.”

― Gabor Mate,

In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction

“to suffer is alot easier than change. in order to be happy one needs to have courage.“ - Bert Hellinger

“Until we uncover the actual triggering event in our family history, we can relive fears and feelings that don’t belong to us—unconscious fragments of a trauma—and we will think they’re ours.”

― Mark Wolynn,

It Didn't Start with You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle

“when a couple has children, parenting often consumes all the partners' energies and they have little time left over for their relationship with each other. But the love the parents have their children is nourished by the love in their relationship with each other and is a result of that love. Often, if the couple relationship is restored to first priority, the parenting improves aswell. Above all, children feel happy when they have the experience of having parents who love each other." - Bert Hellinger

“It’s important to restate: not all behaviors expressed by us actually originate from us. They can easily belong to family members who came before us. We can merely be carrying the feelings for them or sharing them. We call these “identification feelings.”

― Mark Wolynn,

It Didn't Start with You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle

"You don't truly love someone until you love their fate, too." - Bert Hellinger

“Not every story has a happy ending, ... but the discoveries of science, the teachings of the heart, and the revelations of the soul all assure us that no human being is ever beyond redemption. The possibility of renewal exists so long as life exists. How to support that possibility in others and in ourselves is the ultimate question.” ― Gabor Maté, In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction “When an inner situation is not made conscious, it happens outside as fate. —Carl Jung, Aion: Researches into the Phenomenology of the Self” ― Mark Wolynn, It Didn't Start with You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle

“The greatest damage done by neglect, trauma or emotional loss is not the immediate pain they inflict but the long-term distortions they induce in the way a developing child will continue to interpret the world and her situation in it. All too often these ill-conditioned implicit beliefs become self-fulfilling prophecies in our lives. We create meanings from our unconscious interpretation of early events, and then we forge our present experiences from the meaning we’ve created. Unwittingly, we write the story of our future from narratives based on the past...Mindful awareness can bring into consciousness those hidden, past-based perspectives so that they no longer frame our worldview.’Choice begins the moment you disidentify from the mind and its conditioned patterns, the moment you become present…Until you reach that point, you are unconscious.’ …In present awareness we are liberated from the past.” ― Gabor Maté, In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction “Once key connections are made, and we practice focusing on our healing images and experiences, we lay the groundwork for new neural pathways. Healing can then be surprisingly efficient.” ― Mark Wolynn, It Didn't Start with You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle

“Not why the addiction but why the pain.” ― Gabor Maté “When I am sharply judgmental of any other person, it's because I sense or see reflected in them some aspect of myself that I don't want to acknowledge.” ― Gabor Maté, In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction

“If people are addicted to self-soothing behaviours, it's only because in their formative years they did not receive the soothing they needed. Such understanding helps delete toxic self-judgment on the past and supports responsibility for the now. Hence the need for compassionate self-inquiry.” ― Gabor Maté, In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction

“Emotional competence requires the capacity to feel our emotions, so that we are aware when we are experiencing stress; the ability to express our emotions effectively and thereby to assert our needs and to maintain the integrity of our emotional boundaries; the facility to distinguish between psychological reactions that are pertinent to the present situation and those that represent residue from the past. What we want and demand from the world needs to conform to our present needs, not to unconscious, unsatisfied needs from childhood. If distinctions between past and present blur, we will perceive loss or the threat of loss where none exists; and the awareness of those genuine needs that do require satisfaction, rather than their repression for the sake of gaining the acceptance or approval of others. Stress occurs in the absence of these criteria, and it leads to the disruption of homeostasis.”

― Gabor Maté, When the Body Says No: The Cost of Hidden Stress “All of the diagnoses that you deal with - depression, anxiety, ADHD, bipolar illness, post traumatic stress disorder, even psychosis, are significantly rooted in trauma. They are manifestations of trauma. Therefore the diagnoses don't explain anything. The problem in the medical world is that we diagnose somebody and we think that is the explanation. He's behaving that way because he is psychotic. She's behaving that way because she has ADHD. Nobody has ADHD, nobody has psychosis - these are processes within the individual. It's not a thing that you have. This is a process that expresses your life experience. It has meaning in every single case.” Vulnerability is our susceptibility to be wounded. This fragility is part of our nature and cannot be escaped. The best the brain can do is to shut down conscious awareness of it when pain becomes so vast or unbearable that it threatens our ability to function. The automatic repression of painful emotion is a helpful child's prime defence mechanism and can enable the child to endure trauma otherwise be catastrophic. The unfortunate consequence is a wholesale dulling of emotional awareness.” ― Gabor Maté, In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction Here are also the QNA’s I have done that are in relation to how Energy works (This is not a replacement for actual practice, knowing this is NOT ENOUGH)  I will continue to add to this with anything that I find would help. I’m hoping you guys take this seriously, and don’t attempt anything that could potentially harm yourself or others in a reading. 

[whattodowithace]

Drive-In Movie (Byeongkwan)

Title: Drive-In Movie 

Pairing: Byeongkwan (A.C.E) x Reader

Genre: Fluff & hint of Spice

Word Count: 1,378

Writer: Whattodowithkpop [Lio]

*****

Byeongkwan shuffles his feet nervously as he waits outside the Beat building, his breath coming out in warm whiffs against the frigid air that covers Seoul. He scarf was wrapped tightly around his neck, his jacket keeping his torso warm as its pockets keep his bare hands warm inside its fleece confines.

His train of thought is interrupted by the heavy front door being pushed open by a smaller framed woman who was just as decked out in winter gear as he was. Her scarf covering her mouth and nose as her hat came down over her ears. Her mitten covered hands did their best to grip the door’s handle to close it gently. She turns to Byeongkwan with her eyes smiling as she walks up to him.

“You ready?” She asks him as she pulls his arm, leading him into the cold night. Byeongkwan follows behind her, being dragged by his arm as they make their way through the quiet streets of Seoul. Normally the two would be engaged in heavy conversation, but Byeongkwan’s mind was racing as he debated being brave as Jun had suggested to him, or drawing away from an opportunity he has been trying to grasp for two years.

Byeongkwan had a major crush on his his friend who was currently dragging him passed the large city buildings. He had made many plans to ask her out or tell her about his feeling, but he always panicked, soiling his plans every time. He talked to the other members, getting ideas from them when Jun suggested a brilliant idea.

“Take her to a drive in movie, she was saying how she wanted to go.”

Byeongkwan remembered her expressing her want to go see the new movie release. But he was nervous cause she had suggested that all the members go. Would she want to go with just him? Byeongkwan doubted it, which was where his worries were born from.

The walk to their destination was shorter than Byeongkwan really liked, he wanted more time to think and decide if this was a good idea or not. But, alas, they were here at her apartment which was only a couple building away from Byeongkwan’s.

“Byeongkwan, get some sleep.” She tells him, breaking him from his running thoughts. “You deserve it.”

“I will.” He smiles with a nod, making her smile back.

“Goodnight!” She waves as she begins to turn.

Before Byeongkwan can register it himself, he calls out her name, her attention fully on him. He can feel his hands clamming and his heart beating in his ears as he looked into her eyes.

“I was wondering…” He starts, looking behind her to the building to keep from looking into her eyes. “If you weren’t busy…” His nervousness overwhelms him and he clams up, not being able to speak.

“I’m never too busy for you, Byeongkwan.” She speaks up after many seconds of silence. Her words make Byeongkwan blush and to lose coherent thinking.

“Whatever it is, count me in! Just text me the date and time.” She giggles as he stares at her with wide eyes, not able to really process much of what was happening.

She leans forward and kisses his cheek, making a chill run down his spine and butterflies to erupt in his stomach. “Goodnight, Byeongkwan.”

WIth that, she enters her apartment complex, leaving a blushing, panicked Byeongkwan standing on the sidewalk. He slowly began to smile as excitement and nervousness fills his body as he finally pushes himself to make his way home.

~

The day for the movie night came and Byeongkwan was so nervous he felt nauseous. The rest of the boys tried to calm him down, but nothing was going to work when we was about to be in a car alone with someone his heart went crazy for.

Byeongkwan had packed his car to the brim full of items he thought they would need for the movie. Snacks, extra blankets, pillows, etc. He wanted to be prepared for anything that might be thrown at him so he packed accordingly.

He said his goodbye to his group mates, taking a deep breath before exiting out the door.

~

Byeongkwan’s palms were sticking to the steering wheel as he drove. He had picked her up and she was, thankfully, carrying the conversation cause he was too nervous to come up with conversation topics like he usually did when they were all together.

“I have been so excited for this movie!” She exclaims as Byeongkwan pulls into the outdoor theater.

“I remember you talking about it.” Byeongkwan laughs as she lets her excitement escape her body in her actions.

“I’m glad you asked me to go.” She tells him, looking at him as he parked his car and turned it off. “We never hang out just us two.”

Byeongkwan’s nervousness spikes again as he looks at her. She always dressed nicely, but she wasn’t in comfortable clothes as she usually was. Her body being hugged by the material that rest on it, making Byeongkwan even more nervous.

“I’m glad you wanted to hang out. Just the two of us.” Byeongkwan smiles, his ears burning a bright red.

She smiles back at him as she looks up to the big screen.

~

The movie was about halfway through and Byeongkwan had kept his composure. He was able to actually enjoy the movie, reacting the correct way throughout it. His nerves had almost dissipated by this point which he was thankful for.

However, he about choked when he felt her hand on his knee. He jerked his head to see her thumb moving over his jeans, making his body heat up as he tried to focus his attention back to the movie. His focus was gone, however as he was hyperaware of her hand and he really couldn’t focus on anything but his heavy breathing.

His body tenses as her hands trails further up to his thigh. Byeongkwan coughs to cover up the whine his throat released. His hand goes to his mouth, rubbing his lips to distract himself from her contact.

“Sorry.” She chuckles as she looks over to his wrecked state. “It’s really hard to resist.”

Her words makes a chill go up his spine as he lets out a shaky breath, shutting his eyes tightly. Byeongkwan suddenly feels the urge to kiss her roughly, but his nerves get the better of him. He reaches for her hand, pulling it from his body, watching as her face falls.

“It’s not that I dont like it…” He stutters as he avoids her eyes, keeping her hand intertwined with his. “I like it too much and I don’t want to reach a point I can’t return.”

She smiles as she crawls over to his seat, straddling his hips, him trying to stutter out words.

She grabs his face holding him in her hands as she glances to his lips before looking deep into his eyes. “It’s okay if you get carried away. I really wouldn’t mind.”

Byeongkwan whimpers quietly as his hands squeeze his seat as she stares into his soul.

“I’m going to kiss you, Byeongkwan.” She tells him as she leans closer to him.

Her hands lead his lips to hers, their lips tingling as soon as they meet. Byeongkwan’s eyes close slowly as his shaky hand wraps around her back, pushing her closer to him. He could feel his heart in his head, bursting at the seems as his mind goes blank.

She pulls away after a few moments smiling down to him as his eyes lag a bit behind hers in opening. A giggle escapes her as she runs her thumbs over his cheeks.

“I hope you brought these pillows and blankets for a reason.” She suddenly teases, making Byeongkwan’s eyes widen.

“That… That’s not.. I mean that wasn’t why…” He begins to ramble, only her lips hitting his making him halt his words.

“I think we should go home instead.” She whispers against his lips. Byeongkwan nods against her, agreeing with her.

“This movie isn’t as interesting.” He admits as his fingers rub nervous patterns against her back.

She hums as she reaches for his seatbelt, strapping him in. “I agree. Let’s get out of here.”

MASTERLIST

[backtobackbakubabe]

I’m Gonna Make This Place Your Home (part 2)

Bakugo X Reader

She’s just my roommate. 

Words: 2810

*****************************************************************************************************

He sipped on his third coffee as he scrolled through article after article on his laptop. It was almost noon and you were still sound asleep. He'd let you sleep as long as you needed. 

He had woken up with your back firmly pressed against his chest and his arm snug around your waist. He hated pulling away from you but he had to remind himself that he didn't know you and this was probably the last thing you needed. You had been a prisoner almost your whole life. You didn't need someone like him in your life. Someone harsh and angry. You had had enough of that already, he had seen it in your dream. He would be an asshole if he tried anything with you. So he would have to settle for slightly over protective roommate. 

He was looking for any article that might be linked to you. Trying to find out more about you, anything that would confirm your story. Not that he didn't trust you, but he just needed to know. He had been looking for almost an hour and he couldnt find anything. He already knew you weren't going to be on any social media. But he couldn't find any articles about a kidnapping or a missing persons report. To be fair he didn't have much to go on. All he had was your first name. He didnt even know how old you were. 

He was about to give up when something caught his eye. 

It was picture of you. You were very young maybe 5 or 6, but it was definitely you. 

Childs mother accused of selling her daughter and making it look like a kidnapping. Police found a suspicious amount of money that had been transferred to the mothers bank account only two days before her daughter was supposedly kidnapped. The transaction was untraceable, leading the police to believe that it was an illegal transaction of some kind. The daughter is on record for being an early bloomer who’s quirk is dream related. Such a quirk would be very dangerous in the wrong hands. The detective who made the original report on the kidnapping is now under investigation as well for corrupting evidence and tampering with the crime scene to help it fit the mothers story. 

And he thought he had a shitty mom... He couldnt help but stare at the picture. You looked so happy. You had braided pigtails and a goofy smile, showing off your missing teeth. You were so young... You had no idea that you your life was about to turn to shit. You didn't know what your life was going to become. It wasn’t fair... You didn't deserve this. The little girl in this picture deserved a chance to be a kid, to grow up, to be normal. But that was taken away from you. You would never get that time back. 

Thanks to the article he now knew how old you were, only about a year and a half younger than him. He cringed at the thought that while he and Deku were out exploring as children you were being forced to work for villains.  

He slammed his laptop shut when he heard you tip toeing into the kitchen. Still only wearing his oversized hoodie and boxers. Your hair was now in a messy bun and you looked adorable. You were only in the kitchen for a few seconds before you came out with a cup of coffee. 

You sat down on the couch next to him criss cross style. You gave your cup a weird look as you smelled it. 

“What? Did I make it too strong or something?” 

You gave him an embarrassed look, “I’ve actually never had coffee... I’ve always wanted to though. There was this book I read once, when I was probably around.. I don’t know thirteen. This girl met her soul mate at a coffee shop. She had written her number down on a napkin but he accidentally threw it away. Then he ended up going there every day in the hopes that he’d see her again. At the same time she was coming back to find him, but they kept missing each other. He ended up finding her again because she had a really weird coffee order and he heard someone call it out at the coffee shop. ” You shrugged, “I know it’s just a drink and its so stupid but...I don’t know.”

Bakugo stood up and took the cup out of your hands, “Well you’re not going to drink this shit then. Come on put some pants on. We’ll go out and get some real coffee.” 

You tried not to be nervous as you walked a few blocks to the coffee shop. Bakugo was with you. Nothing would happen. You kept looking over your shoulder expecting someone to jump out and say ‘Gotcha’. Bakugo could sense you were a bit stressed so he put an arm around your shoulder and leaned in, “It’s okay to be cautious. You have every right to be. But you cant live your life in fear. As long as you’re with me you’re safe. Got it?”

You nodded taking a moment to enjoy his caramel scent invading your personal space, “Got it.” 

You kept having to stop every so often and pull you pants up because it didn’t matter how tight you tied your borrowed sweatpants, they were just too big. Bakugo noticed this and paused. “Ok so clothes first or coffee first? You look a bit uncomfortable. I can can get you some clothes that actually fit you.”

You hugged yourself, “I wouldn't mind some pants... maybe a few shirts. But I actually really like this hoodie. Do you think we could get me one.”

Bakugo gave you a soft smile, “If you like it that much you can have it. Its just an old UA hoodie. I have tons of them.” 

You gave him a beaming smile and a quick nod, “Thank you! I’m going to wear it everyday!”

He just laughed at you, “Really it’s no problem. It’s probably best if you wash it every once in a while though. So clothes first or coffee?” 

You didn't even hesitate, “Coffee!” 

A few minutes later you both were standing in line in the cutest little cafe. The menu was huge and overwhelming. You nervously tugged at your hoodie sleeve, looking back and forth at the expansive menu. 

Bakugo saw your eyes dart back and forth over the menu, “That side of the menu is all tea. This side over here is all coffee. For your first time I would go with something sweet. Are there any flavors you prefer?”

You blushed, “I’ve recently been craving caramel.” He didn't need to know that that was purely based on the fact that he smelled like caramel last night when he was holding you when he thought you were asleep.

He nodded as you approached the front of the line, “Two hot caramel lattes, biggest ones you’ve got. And if you could add some cinnamon that'd be great thanks.” 

The girl behind the counter gave Bakugo a bright smile that made you uncomfortable. She looked crazy... why is she looking at him like that? “Is there anything else I can get for you? Anything at all?”

 You looked at him as he handed over some money to pay for your drinks. He seemed like he wasn’t paying her any attention. “No that’ll be it, oh wait! Y/n did you want anything to eat? Muffin? Croissant? Bagel?”

You bit your lip, “A muffin sounds amazing.” 

He smiled, “Yeah I agree.” He turned back to the girl behind the counter his smile disappearing, “Please add two blueberry muffins to my order.”

The girls smile faltered as she turned to look at you. Obviously not impressed with what she saw. “Of course, we’ll have that right out to you.” She rolled her eyes as soon as she didn't think Bakugo was looking, but you saw it and you had no idea what you could possibly have done to upset this complete stranger. 

You chose a cozy looking corner that had a couch and a little table. You were basically buzzing with excitement. You jumped up when you heard them call your order. You were almost to the pick up counter when you stepped on the end of the sweatpants you were wearing and tripped. Bakugo was up and at your side in an instant, “Hey walk much? I know you’re excited but I promise its nothing to trip over.” 

You knew by his tone he was just teasing you. So you took his outstretched hand and pulled yourself up, “Thanks. I’ll try to be less embarrassing in the future.” 

The same girl who had taken you order was now leaning over the pick up counter, “Well I’d start with not wearing baggy ass clothing in public.” She pushed your coffee towards you and plastered on the fakest smile you had ever seen, “Have a nice day. Come  back soon.” 

Bakugo’s hands slammed down on the counter but somehow when he started talking he sounded completely calm. Which was almost scarier, “Look here little miss bitch. I dont think you have a problem with her clothes, I think you have a problem with her wearing my clothes. I've been coming here for years and you always fucking flirt with me. It’s not my fault that after all this time you haven't picked up on the fact that I’m not interested. Next time we come in you better have one hell of an apology or I’m calling the owner. We go way back. I saved his life once. Who's side do you think he’ll take?” He looked over to you and handed you your coffee, “Here, take this and dont forget your muffin. We’re leaving.” 

You felt you face heat up as you left the cafe, “Bakugo you didn't have to do that. I dont even know her. She can think what she wants. It doesn't bother me. No matter what she thinks it’s probably still better than the truth. There’s no way for her to know who I am or what I’ve been through.”

He grunted, “Thats the thing. She doesn't know what you’ve been through but it  shouldn't matter! You treat people with respect, especially paying customers in your place of business. She’s lucky I didn't get her ass fired.”

You put your hand on his shoulder, “Thank you for defending me. I appreciate it, I truly do. But just know it isn't necessary.” 

He softened a bit, “I told you. As long as you’re with me you’re safe. And that includes deranged baristas.” He didnt know why he was already so attached to you. He knows he met you last night but thats not really true is it? He's seen you in his dreams for months. In a way it feels like he’s known you much longer. He gestured towards your coffee, “So how do you like it?” 

You brought the to-go cup up to your lips and slowly took your first sip. You closed your eyes and hummed in response to the warm delicious beverage. “This... is... wow. This is my new favorite thing.”

Bakugo pretended to be hurt, “Oh wow I thought you said my cooking was the best.” 

You giggled, “I can like two things Bakugo. Coffee is my favorite drink. Your noodles are my favorite food.” 

“Alright I think I can deal with that. Let’s go get you some clothes.” He stopped you before you could take a step and his hands found your waist. Your heart started to race, “Dont freak out I’m just trying to help you out a little.” His fingers pinched your waistband and rolled it a few times. Making the pants you were wearing a bit shorter as well as tighter. “That should be good enough to get you to the store without any more graceful accidents.”

And it was. You arrived at a clothing store just as you finished your coffee. He held the door open for you and you stepped into what was either heaven or hell. You weren't sure yet. There were clothes everywhere! Hanging on the wall. Folded on tables. There was hardly room to move around the store. “Oh wow.” 

“Yeah I know... It’s a lot. But I figured you’re stating from scratch and this place has everything. Or so I’ve been told.” He pointed to a rack off to the back of the store that had an abundance of jeans, “Lets start there and get you out of those tripping hazards.” 

You stepped out of the fitting room to show Bakugo the pair you picked, “What do you think? I think they fit pretty well.” 

His eyes were immediately glued to your ass. He felt like such a creep for even looking but once he did it was hard for him to look away. “Yeah they look great. Why dont we get a few pairs.” 

You looked at the price tag, “I dont know they're kind of expensive...”

He just waved you off, “Dont even worry about it.”

Bakugo sat patiently while you tried on clothes. Which was saying a lot for him. Sure he’s gotten better since high school but he still wouldn't consider himself a patient person by any stretch of the imagination. Yet here he was. You came out in a Ground Zero onesie and he rolled his eyes, “Real cute. Now put it back,”

You shook your head, “No I like it. And its on sale. Please! It so cozy! The inside is so soft! It’s like its hugging me.”

He grunted. Was he really jealous of an article of clothing? His own merch no less? “Whatever. If you want it that bad lets get it.” He stood up from his spot and cracked his back from sitting down for so long. “You about ready to go?” 

You nodded as you started to pile all of your clothes into a basket by his feet. You had ended up with several pairs of jeans, leggings, and sweatpants. Tons of shirts, a jacket, three pairs of shoes, and a couple dresses. “Yeah I just need to get underwear.” 

He blushed. God damnit Bakugo get your shit together. He had seen plenty of naked girls before. He cleaned his throat, “I think that’s over there. I’ll go ahead and start getting all this stuff rung up at the counter.” 

You skipped away to the direction of the underwater department while he went to the front to start the check out process. The women who started ringing in all your items gave him a sweet smile, “You’re such a good boyfriend. I saw you over there with her while she tried clothes on. My fiancé would have been complaining in the first ten minutes.” 

He flinched, “I’m not her... she's... were not together. She's my roommate.” 

The women quirked an eyebrow, “Oh? And do you make it a habit of buying all of your roommates hundreds of dollars worth of clothes?” 

Bakugo growled, “Just ring this shit up would ya?”

He was messing with all the kick knack stuff by the register, purposively ignoring the growing total. His eye caught a something that he knew he had to get. It was a necklace that had a rose cold coffee cup. The smoke swirled up into a heart and as cheesy as it was he just had to buy it for you. He tossed in onto the pile of clothes, “This too...”

She eyes it carefully, “Are you sure you two aren't-”

“Hey I picked some stuff out. I tried to stay pretty practical. Just got a bundle pack of underwear one nice bra and two sports bras. The lady over there helped me pick them out. She kept trying to get my to buy some really uncomfortable looking pair, insisting you would like it but they looked itchy.” You almost choked when you saw the total. “Oh my gosh Bakugo! We need to put some of it back! That’s way too much!”

He shook his head and put a hand on your shoulder, “Nope. You need it. You cant keep wearing my clothes. As cute as it is, you need your own.” 

You picked up the necklace that was now sitting on top. “Oh I love this... but I dont remember picking it out...”

“That’s because I did. I thought you’d like i-”

You had thrown your arms around his neck, “You are honestly the nicest person in the world. I’m so glad I found you... I dont know what would have happened to me if I hadn’t.”

He made eye contact with the clerk over you shoulder and she was giving him a shit eating grin as if to say roommate huh? “I’m happy you like it.” 

[novannna]

You Were the Hands That Held Me

Danissa soulmate au.  everyone has a soul mate, and any marking that appears on their skin, appears on yours.  narcissa’s pov.  Kinda angsty, but also fluffy.  

tw: self harm, and mentions of abuse kinda

wc: 2363

Narcissa stared at her arm in awe.  This was the first time her soulmate had ever drawn something on her skin.  She had felt the same cuts and bruises her soulmate had received, just like everyone else, but this was the first time her soulmate had deliberately marked her own skin.

Messy butterflies with uneven wings, and twisted antennas marched down Narcissa’s forearm.  

“Oh,” she whispered.  “Cool.”  She grabbed the nearest marked, and held it poised above the other arm, ready to reply, but thought better of it.  

She shouldn’t force her soulmate to stop their art for Narcissa.  She dropped the marker, and kept watching the thick lines as they covered her entire arm.  

That night she washed it all away in scalding hot water before her grandfather noticed.  He wouldn’t approve of Narcissa communicating with her soulmate.  

He hated the idea of How there was one person in the world, waiting just for you.  

His soulmate had died years ago, leaving him heartbroken and angry, bitter to the world.   

If Narcissa wasn’t careful, he might take the anger out on her.    

Narcissa could take it, but she didn’t want to hurt her soulmate too.  Narcissa would feel awful.  

So she tried to ignore the small flowers and butterflies her soulmate drew constantly.  Narcissa tried her very best.  

---

Years later, Narcissa wrote to her soulmate for the first time.  It was in the middle of the night, when Narcissa had felt a searing pain across her arm that looked like a red slit across her pale skin.  

Her soulmate was in trouble.  She couldn’t just stand by now. Narcissa had to do something.  

Grabbing a tissue to staunch the bleeding, Narcissa scrawled across her hand in thick ink. 

STOP

I can’t , her soulmate replied. 

Please, just hear me out, Narcissa wrote, hoping she could do enough.  Hoping she could convince the person who had drawn butterflies everywhere on their body, that maybe the world really did want them. 

please, just stay out of this

I can’t. This is my body too.  And even though I’ve never met you, you're my soulmate and I care about you. 

Fine. I’ll listen. Her soulmate's handwriting was a little shaky, but very neat, with tall, loopy letters.  

I’m guessing you’ve been having a hard time with life recently, Narcissa started. 

I guess

Do you want to be here?  Narcissa asked bluntly

There was a long pause.  I don’t know, her soulmate finally responded.  I love Earth, but the people…. I can’t stand the people. All they do is bring hate and hurt to me

I get that.  But the people don’t matter. You do.  Danna wrote desperately. 

No I don’t. I’ve never done a single good thing in my life

You have!  You’ve made me smile!  You’ve made me laugh!  

Her soulmate replied, When?  This is the first time I’ve ever talked to you

When we were younger, you used to constantly doodle little flowers and butterflies all across our bodies. I loved to watch you draw them, watch the blocky little lines appear across my body.   Danna smiled as she recalled the delicate insects she wore across her body daily. 

I thought you hated those. That’s why I stopped

No, of course not!

Then why did you erase them?

Narcissa sighed. She thought for a second, then wrote, my grandfather. He hates soulmates. If he knew I was communicating with mine, I’m afraid he would hurt me.  And doing that would hurt you. 

But… that means you could get in trouble right now!

No. I won’t, I’m fine. You are more important.  Tell me, what made you want to hurt yourself today?

I guess I’m just tired of being ignored. I’m tired of being treated like a child. I want to leave my house, but I can’t. I can’t live on my own. 

Thats okay, you shouldn’t be ignored.  You should be your own person, and if your parents cant see that, they’re idiots!!

Narcissa capped the pen, and tried to wrap her blanket around her arm, the blood slowly soaked through the fabric, staining the blanket a bright red.  How would she explain that to her grandfather?  It didn’t matter right now though.  Right now, she had to make sure her soulmate was okay.  That was her one and only goal.  Nothing else mattered.  Narcissa had the opportunity to maybe save a life right now.  That’s what she had to do.  

They aren’t.  I’m the one who’s screwing up, her soulmate replied.  I cant ever get anything right.  Im just a big mistake that shouldn't even exist.  The worlds probably better without me

THATS NOT FUCKING TRUE!  Narcissa scrawled as quickly as she could.  I dont believe it.  Not for a second.  Just by being here, you’ve made the world a better place.  Everyday, I wake up and check my body for some indicator that you’re here.  I can’t help but think about the fact that there is someone out there meant for me.  And I’m meant for someone.  

I guess…

Narcissa sighed heavily.  She had to go to bed before her grandfather woke and saw her light on.  

Are you okay?  She wrote.  Are you in any danger?  If you are, im here.  For both of us

A minute passed before the reply came.  I dont think so.  I think im better.  But… if i feel bad again, can i talk to u?  This actually really helped me.  Thank you

Narcissa smiled.  Of course!!!  Just, could u write somewhere less obvious?

Sure.  I understand.

Narcissa smiled gratefully.  How ‘bout our ankles?  That’s less obvious and easy for me to hide

She felt pressure on her right foot, and slid it out from beneath her blanket.  A smile, and little butterfly doodle greeted her eyes.  

Good night, soulmate, Narcissa wrote

Good night.  Sleep tight.  And… thank you.

Narcissa smiled.  She slid out of bed, and held her arm close to her chest while creeping to the bathroom.  Once inside, she scrubbed all of the ink off her skin, and bandaged the red slit shut.  

Narcissa and her soulmate were okay.  That was all that mattered.  Everything was alright.  At least for now.  But now was the only thing Narcissa could bear to think about.  

---

After that one night, Narcissa’s soulmate never hurt themselves like that again.  But that didn’t mean they weren’t hurting.   Narcissa could tell they were hurting themselves in other ways.  

She tried to help.  She wrote reminders every few hours, telling her soulmate to eat, and drink water.  She wrote encouraging messages, and doodled across their skin.  

But still, Narcissa would feel her stomach growl with hunger, and her tongue beg for more water.  She felt her eyes grow heavy even though she had slept almost 10 hours the night before.  Her soulmate just didn’t care, and there was nothing Narcissa could do. 

They would talk to each other constantly, ranting about their day, or commenting about something they saw.  Narcissa grew much closer to the person she had never even seen the face of. Closer to them then anyone else she had ever known.  

Even her grandfather. 

Narcissa had a very strained relationship with her grandfather.  She knew deep down he loved her, but he had a hard time showing it.  He was caught in a life of crime, and there was no way out.  

He had been an arms dealer for years, selling guns and other weapons on the black market.  He made a lot of money, but not a lot of friends.  He was a bitter old man, who took all of his anger out on Narcissa.  He had never hit her, but his words were hard enough. 

Narcissa knew she was being abused, and belittled, and manipulated, but she always ended up excusing his actions. Or even worse, sometimes she would place the blame on herself.  She knew she was in a bad situation, but it was one she was stuck in. 

Narcissa talked about him lots with her soulmate.  It turned out, they had a similar situation with their parents.  

Mistreated, abused, bullied, shamed. 

The two escaped into their skin, engrossed with each other.  They held each other right through the pain and the tears.  Though at times, both of them desperately wanted to, they held strong and never hurried themselves for fear of hurting the other. 

---

One day, the straw finally snapped for Narcissa. She was 17 now, and old enough to live her own life. Old enough to understand what her grandfather gave her wasn’t love, it was trauma.  

After he yelled at her for an hour straight because she put a book in the wrong bookshelf, Narcissa decided she had taken enough. 

Can we go?  She desperately scrawled across her ankle. Can we escape these sorry excuses for lives?

Her soulmate wrote back a few minutes later. What do you mean?

We’re old enough to live on our own. Why are we forcing ourselves to live with these people who treat us so terribly. Why don’t we just run away together?

Ok. The reply shocked Narcissa. She had been expecting them to try and convince her otherwise, make her see the absurdity. Not agree.  But Narcissa was glad they agreed. They both deserved a chance to start over. To make a life for themselves, and do it right. 

You will?

With you?  Of course I will silly. I’ve been waiting years for me to ask

When?   When can we leave?

Whenever your ready

A week, Narcissa declared, I’ll meet you in a week at Gatlon City, at the train station

Ok.   I’ll be there, I promise, her soulmate wrote. 

Me too. Narcissa grinned. She was finally escaping. Finally starting fresh. Finally leaving her grandfather to be with someone who truly cared.  Narcissa couldn’t wait.

---

Narcissa creaked the door open, cringing as the hinges squealed loudly. 

“Just where do you think you’re going?”  Her grandfather slurred from the couch. 

Shitshitshitshit, Narcissa though. She was caught.  She was never going to escape her life.

“I told you earlier this week I’m going to a friends house tonight,” Narcissa said lightly, trying to mask her terror. 

“Stop lying!”  He screamed.  “I know that’s not true, you don’t have any friends.”

Narcissa cringed.  

She breathed in deeply.  She was already leaving forever, there was no point in lying anymore.  

“Fine  I’m leaving.  For good.”  She braced herself for the rage. 

Instead, he laughed.  “You?  You're leaving?”  He scoffed.  “You would never.  You’re too scared and dependent on me.”

Narcissa drew herself up.  “No.  You’re wrong.  I’m leaving, to find my soulmate.  We’re making our own life.  Together.”

He gaped at her.  “You can’t!  You can’t go to your soulmate,” he spat.  “You’ll live a terrible life.  You’ll be tied down forever.”

Narcissa shook her head.  “No.  I won’t.  I’ll live the best life I can.  Because I’ll be happy.  I won’t live in fear anymore.  I’m sorry you weren’t meant for your soulmate, but it’s different for me.  I know them.  We are meant for each other.  I wouldn’t expect you to understand.  All you know is hate.”

“So you’re really going?”  Her grandfather’s lip curled up.  

Narrcissa nodded.  “I am.  I’m making my own life, as far away from here as possible.”

“Then go!”  He snarled.  “I don’t want you in my house if you won’t see a reason.  Go.”  He picked a book sitting next to him, and hurled it at Narcissa’s head.  

She ducked, her hair ruffling by the wind.  

She turned to him, tears in her eyes.  “Goodbye grandfather.  I’m sorry.”  She threw open the door, and fled into the night.

---

Narcissa’s heart thudded in her ears.  This was it.  This was the day she was going to meet her soulmate.  She knew she should be realistic, but Narcissa couldn’t help imagining the meeting like something out of the sappy romance novels she liked to read.  

She expected the dreary clouds to disappear, and the sun to shine out on top of them.  

She expected to know exactly who was her other half

She expected to run up, into their arms, and kiss them like she had wanted to be kissed her entire life.  

But Narcissa knew how unlikely it was.  But, a girl could hope, couldn’t she?  

She inhaled deeply.  Uncapping the pen with her teeth, she scrawled on her palm, I’m here  

Me too, her soulmate wrote back.  The familiar loopy red marks eased Narcissa.  She knew this person.  This was her soulmate.  Everything was going to be okay.  It would all be okay.  

Her eyes locked onto a girl standing near a bench, her head bent over her hand, a pen tucked behind her ear.  

Somehow, Narcissa knew.  She knew this was the person she had been searching for her whole life.  She knew that the girl was her soulmate.  

Summoning every miniscule scrap of courage Narcissa could find, she approached the girl.  

She tapped her shoulder.  “Hi,” Narcissa breathed, heart pounding.  “I’m Narcissa.  I think I’m your-”

She was interrupted by the girl throwing her arms around her tightly.  

“I’ve waited so long to meet you,” Narcissa’s soulmate said roughly, her voice thick with tears.  “I’m Danna.”  

Narcissa laughed.  She realized she was crying.  “Me too.”

“I feel like I already know everything about you,” Danna laughed.  She swiped her eyes.  

Narcissa nodded.  “I know we’re soulmates, but I want you to know I understand if you don’t want me,” she said.  “I get it- not all soulmates are really soulmates.”

She was cut off by Danna pressing her lips to hers.  “I want you,” Danna breathed.  “You're the one who I’ve trusted with every secret I’ve ever held.  You’re the one who helped me when no one else could.  You’re the one who took care of me.”  Danna held their hands up, exposing the thick identical scars that spread across their wrists.  “You are the only other person in the world who understood, and actually helped me.  You were the hands that held me.”  Danna reached her hand to Narcissa’s face, wiping away her tears.  “I want you, and no one else.”

“Me too,” Narcissa whispered.  “Me too.”

Tag list: @novissa @thepurpledragon4444  @phobidawg @janisarkisian  @rvbell @lavenderbloo @redassassin  (let me know if you want to be added/taken off!!!)

[thewritingstar]

Waiting in the Rain

Pairing: Gruvia

School starts tomorrow and although I’m excited, i really dont wanna go. Anyways, sorry for falling off the face of the earth for a little bit and hopefully more fics with be produced. Hope you all enjoy.

This is set when Gray leaves Juvia for the six months to go to the dark guilt. 

Heres your daily cup of angst. Extra angsty. 

----

Guilt.

Guilt was something he was no stranger too. Every since he was little he had carried a burden on his shoulders for years.

Watching his master die in front of him and blaming himself for her death was one thing he had learned to let go. It took time but after years of reliving that nightmare, he knew there was nothing he could have done.

He fought that battle and won. He could be at peace with her now.

But there was certain guilt that eats at you. Makes you unable to sleep and eat properly because it’s tearing you from the inside out.

There’s small reminders that carve into your brain, making sure that you know what you did.

His stomach churned for the worse and he couldn’t even describe the feeling deep in his gut as he approached the edge of the town.

It used to be a sacred place for them. He can remember the warmth of the memories and how much he desperately craves for those moments back. He’d give everything.

But now. As he wonders, it’s the complete opposite. It’s dark and cold, numbing to say the least. And if you were to stay longer than five minutes, you might catch a cold from the storm that rages above.

But he keeps going, passing the shops he once knew that were now abandoned. This place had become a waste land, all because of him.

He walks towards a familiar trail, one he hiked for months. But now it felt more like a death march, and he had no business to be there.

The flowers along the path had suffocated from the water pouring down and since no sun had come through in ages, everything had begun to die. And he was one of them.

He thought that leaving would be fine. He was a fool to think so. He didn’t care how drenched he got as his feet stopped at the edge of a lawn, or well a garden of weeds and muddy puddles.

This pain in his chest was unbearable and looking at the small cottage was almost too much to handle.

He would like to say he had never been a victim of heartbreak, but right now, his heart had shattered beyond repair.

His dark eyes found the way to the window and the tears came as easy as the clouds above.

Instead of the dancing and singing he would see, there was nothing. Just complete darkness that swirled on what used to be his home.

He didn’t know how he managed to walk further, to clutch the handle on the back door. But he didn’t go in, he couldn’t.

He had a mission to accomplish and it was a risk to come back here. But he had to know.

He thought that his undercover work would be easy and that he could slip away in the night and she could go on with her life.

He knew this would happen, but yet he still went.

It was for the greater good, yet the one person he vowed to himself he would protect had now received the worst pain among them all.

His hand came up to the glass as he peered inside. The kitchen was spotless but in a way that looks as if it was never used. The pillows on the couch had been tossed to the floor matching the blankets.

And then his heart stopped, his breath caught in his throat and his spine became glossed over with a chilling threat.

He watched as she came out of a room and toward the kitchen.

Sadness.

Despair.

Heartbreak.

All of those were present on her face and her movements were sluggish and each stepped seem worse than the last.

Even through the glass he could see the bags under her eyes and that they were slightly bruised from the pain she had shed.

He watched as she poured herself a glass of water and just, stared at it. Then walked towards the couch.

He saw he pick up a pillow and hug it to her chest as she rocked back and fourth slowly staring at nothing. Her eyes were a void but before they sucked you in and made you question why the stars were even created when she captured the world in her eyes. Now they were black holes, destroying everything in her way.

He knew he was the reason for this. And to make it worse he had to go out and tell her how he felt.

He really left her after he expressed how much she meant to him and now she had caused this.

—

The window was slightly cracked and even thought the rain he could hear her. She didn’t say much but a few sniffles and sometimes a sob.

He would have to leave eventually but he found that it was a daily routine to go and see her.

He’d walk through the town he once called a home, wondering about the people he knew and thinking about where they left when the rain came crashing down.

He had finally made it to the cabin one day, saying to the dark guild that he was making a three day trip south but in all honesty he was going to see her.

He knew he couldn’t show up on the door step or even say anything. It might just break her. But apart of him wanted her to open the door and see him. A part of him wanted her to be angry.

She had been full of so much love, he thought he was unworthy and maybe pure hatred of him could help cure the guilt. If she never wanted to see him again, just maybe he could bare with the pain.

But for some reason he stood at the back door again. Luckily they were tinted and he knew that she didn’t have enough sense to probably even notice him, that’s how broken she was.

He never said a word or gave off that he was there. It wasn’t right nor fair.

But as he waited to see her come to the kitchen, he heard a cry. Not the usual sobbing or sniffles of the past few days and weeks but the type of tears you shed when all hope is lost.

He knew the moment Ur died was when it happened. And now he caused it.

He didn’t know why he opened the door and didn’t know why he ran towards her bedroom. He didn’t know why he was suddenly watching her cry her heart out and how he feel to his knees and hugged her to his chest and kissed her forehead and clung to her like she was his life line.

He couldn’t tell you how good it felt to have her in his arms and he could feel the cold tears soaking his dark cloak and the way her body trembled from a unforgivable cold that had taken over her body the day he had left.

“I’m sorry.” He began to sob into her shoulder and her fingers magically tighten around his shoulder as he held her.

He kissed her cheek and her forehead. Kissed her cold hands and her nose. And his lips hovered over hers, a weight hung over his head.

Still she had made no noise. And he thought that maybe she thought this was a dream. A delusion and that if she dared to open her eyes, he would be gone.

There were shivers as he picked her up. Carrying her towards the living room and setting her down on her makeshift bed. He picked up the blankets and tucked her in.

“You’re not him.” She whispered and her voice was almost damaged from the silence it was given.

Her heart ached in his chest as she think it was him. And she was right. This version of him was a fraud. One used to get close to dangerous people in missions.

“I know.” And he watched as her eyes had fluttered opened for the first time.

She was still breathtaking.

Her eyes traced his face but her expression remained blank and dark.

“I have to go.” He said and her cupped her cheek and ran his thumb softly across it. Her eye closed again as he knew that was the way he used to get her to sleep. A little affection that made her feel safe and at peace.

He got up with quiet feet and left the house once more.

As the days passed by he found himself visiting more and more. Most day he would just watch over her from the outside and he felt like a stalker but he needed to make sure she was okay, or alive to say the least.

But he stopped going for a while. Making sure to keep up his rep in the dark guild.

—

He found himself there again but she wasn’t there. Panic had set in and he began a goose chase around town, she hadn’t moved from their house in ages, why now.

The rain this time felt colder than usual. Almost like her soul was in each droplet. His mind was racing with thoughts but as the rain came down, he knew she was still alive.

His feet stopped as he saw her. He wanted to race to her, pick her up and spin her but he couldn’t. He had already done to much.

“Gray-sama?” Her voice small and hoarse.

He wanted to sink to his knees and cry out towards the sky. But then other voices joined.

“Juvia!”

Lucy.

Natsu.

Wendy.

Happy.

Carla.

They were here. And he watched in pain as Juvia collapsed in Natsu’s arms and her body had no strength left.

“I’m going to kill Gray when I see him.” Natsu sneered. And he deserved it.

He had to leave before he was spotted but one last voice made his heart break even more.

“It seems she’s been out here for weeks.”

Weeks

He hasn’t been back in three months.

He ran as fast as he could. Past the house, past the vendors and past the forest. He didn’t stop going until he was in his private quarters in the guild. Until his knees finally hit the floor.

His fists came down hard on the wooden boards and he let out a scream and thanked who ever made this castle since it was sound proof.

Anger bubbles within him. Angry at Erza for making him leave. Angry at himself for causing that pain. Anger at the world.

But even when his chest heaved and his knuckles cracked with blood, he couldn’t blame Erza.

He could only blame himself. At this point it wasn’t about the mission.

He realized in that moment when he saw her body fall into the arms of her guild mates that he loved her. And he didn’t know why he hadn’t told her. 

That living with her and training with her had solidified their relationship and that he would do what ever it takes to have that again.

He craved to have her by his side. He knew she thrived during their time of domestic bliss and he would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy it either.

But how was he suppose to face the woman he loved when he did that to her? Causing her a type of heartbreak and pain that left her body hollow and cold.

He had to shake that feeling off, he had a job to do and now this fueled him. He wouldn’t let these past months of suffering ruin the plan and when they were done and all of this bullshit was over, he was going to prove to Juvia that he deserves to have her heart.

All those moments where she said she loved him wouldn’t die in vain and he vowed from then on to give her the life and love she deserves. If she would allow him too.

He rose from the ground, ready to strike at any moment. He knew Lucy and Natsu would find him soon and the battle would commence. He was ready to put an end to this dark guild plan for good. All for the sake of his love.

—-

He couldn’t believe it. She was running towards his with-a smile.

“Gray-sama!” She cheered but soon she fell into battle mode against Blair.

It happened to fast and soon they were alone. He couldn’t wait as he held her hand leading her to the room. They had barely spoken a word since the battle and she could feel how nervous he was.

“Gray” she said as he opened the door.

He closed and before she could speak, he cupped her cheek and rub his thumb along it. This was their thing, a peaceful gesture.

“Please, just let me.” He almost begged and she nodded as he closed the gap between them.

His lips slowly moved with hers and the kiss wasn’t rushed or steady. It was long and slow and painful. Because he wanted their first kiss to be full of bliss and heated love.

But instead she could feel his tears sliding down his cheek and one hand went to face and the other to his neck. She didn’t want him to feel her pain. She couldn’t allow all that pain she endured to cloud his mind but she knew he couldn’t do that. 

“Juvia doesn’t blame you.” She pulled back. 

“I know you don’t.” He stated. Because they were wizards and when you fight for your guild, everyone understands. But she didn’t have too.

“But it’s not okay.” He said and finally he had the courage to look her in the eyes.

They were full of life and love and sparkled brighter than before but they carried a depth of pain. 

“It’s not.” She agreed. “But Juvia knows you did it for the ones you love and even though she suffered for a short amount of time, you did it so we could have a future and she could never hate you for being strong. Gray, you went on a mission, you never truly left me.” She kissed his tears on his cheek. “Plus, Juvia remembers when you came. At first she thought it was a dream but she knew you always were watching.”

A sob escaped his lips and he held her tight, his hand wrapping into her tight curls as he lost his senses. “I love you so much. And I will never leave you again, I promise.”

His kissed her again and this time it escalated into something deeper. Like a craving they had been held hostage from for so long just wishing that they could be back in their private home together. 

He wanted to tell her over and over how much he loved her and as he kissed her again and again, she knew.

---

When he woke up the next morning, the sun was shining bright. Her body was now full of warmth as she snuggled closer to his chest and he felt like he could finally breath again. 

They had both suffered for months on end without each other, but now he knew it was worth the wait. 

----

Hope you enjoyed!!!! 

[jjpmoans]

Dont know if it's the right time but list #3, number 16. Give me PG 13 fluff! (Love you baby. Good to see you writing again)

16th prompt | #3

"Soulmates don't have to be romantic. Sometimes your soul resonates with your friend."

genre : fluff

Sometimes what you least expected is what you will actually get. And now you know what does it means by that.

"What are you doing!?" You shout as Youngjae, Choi freaking Youngjae stands still in front of your door, all soaked and shivering. "My goodness Youngjae I know you think you are a sunshine but SUN DOESN'T GET SOAKED IN RAIN!"

"You're too loud," he steps inside, making tiny pools on the floor.

"And you're too stupid."

You leave him to find a spare towel so that he won't die from freezing together with a kitchen cloth to wipe his growing water park construction on your floor.

"Take this and go shower oh my goodness why do I befriend with idiots."

After a series of cursing each other and your non-stop claiming you'll be turning stupid as well since you have an idiot as your friend, both of you settle down on your comfy couch while you send daggers toward your friend who's sitting opposite of you.

"What?" he spouts as he wraps his hands around the warmth of your mug. "Don't give me side looks!"

"Choi Youngjae." you start. "For what reason did you decided to go through heavy rain just to sit on my couch with MY hot chocolate in your hand?"

"You said you got rejected. I am here to cheer you up." He replies nonchalantly, taking a small sip of the hot drink. "Mmmm you made the best chocolate drink!"

"Youngjae, it's 3 in 1."

"You select the best chocolate drink!"

"It's literally the only type of drink I have in my house."

"Okay so you made the best drink! Stop trying to bring the atmosphere down!" He exclaims, being annoyed that he tried to lift the mood but you shot down each of his trials.

Not that you are intentionally doing it. It is just how you are with Youngjae. It's normal, though you might have lesser snarky remarks than usual. It's not that bad but Youngjae knows you more than you think.

"I can't state the obvious anymore? Geez." Your heart is sensitive and definitely you have mood swings. So you guess the rejection effects you a lot then. "Jae.."

Judging from the fast reply, you know that he is ready to jump and hug you but you raise your hand to stop him. "Just what do I worth?"

All you want is someone who understands you. Who wants to be with you and accept you for who you are. Why does anyone need to point out any of your minus point and make it something embarrassing for you?

You heard him sigh and you know you are in for a ton of scolding again. Youngjae has clearly reminded you that you don't have to go and search for your soulmate. You will have one, sooner or later. It's just the matter or time.

But living in the society where almost all of your friends have their own soulmate, you dreaded to have one. To know what does it feels like watching the stars with your soulmate. That is why you set to find your mate. But of course it is impossible. You had never known how your friends found their soulmate.

Because they said, your soul resonates who your soulmate is. So unless your soul is gone, you are positive that your mate has died in a car crash.

Youngjae knows how you’re upset with the order of soulmate idea. Each people find their soulmate through different situation, hence they will never know what will happen.

You feel arms around your shoulder and you're pressed against a hard chest, then all you feel is your tears uncontrollably pour out of you.

"Haven't I told you to stop searching for him? You made me so mad."

You know you should. But you really wanted to know how it feels to have a mate. "How does it feel, Jae? To have someone doing all the romantic things to you? Giving you kisses instead of roses?"

You hear him murmurs from the top of your head. "What do you mean. I shower you a lot of kisses!"

You laugh, hitting his chest at once. "You're not romantic Jae! And soulmates should be romantic. They are like, all those cheesy moments. Yeah like that."

"Soulmates don't have to be romantic." He knows you're rolling your eyes but he thread your hair instead. "Sometimes your soul resonates with your friend."

"And that's you?" You laugh when he nods firmly. Youngjae has a way that can always make up for your bad mood. Call it whipped culture, but if you need to choose between Youngjae and your soulmate, you will prefer Youngjae.

Unless he leaves you too for his soulmate.

"Jae." Then you realise that he had never talked about his soulmate. "Do you have a soulmate?

He hums, letting you know that he does. Somehow, that makes your heart drops even lower.

"Do you know who she is?" Soulmates work different ways for different people. Sometimes only the males knows who their soulmate is, and sometimes the opposite. A few will bear soulmate marks, while a few meet their soulmate through love at the first sight.

"Don't you think she will be upset if she knows that you cuddle me to sleep or drops me lots of kisses on my bad days?"

Youngjae laughs, tightening his embrace around you. "No she wouldn't."

"How do you know?"

"Because I'm holding her."

A drop of silence surrounds you, before you can even digest the whole situation.

'Because I'm holding her.'

"Because you're holding her?" You shake your head, getting the fact out straight. "Jae you're holding me! Stop being delusional." He might have slipped his words from excitement.

"Yes I'm holding you."

"So?" You detach yourself from him, facing him with a confused expression. "Explain!"

Youngjae's face turn soft, the softest you can ever see.

"You're a maths student right?"

You groan, of all time, why now? "No I'm not!"

"Exhibit A : I am holding my soulmate. Exhibit B : I am holding you."

"Do the calculation, Einstein."

You gape, waiting for him to grow three heads. Mathematical reasoning is easy, because the last one shall be conclusion.

"Conclusion is...your soulmate is me?"

He smiles, grinning even, ears to ears, finally that you've cracked the code.

"Since..when?" Baffled, even worse, feeling tricked. You went through countless of rejection to know that your soulmate is Choi Youngjae?

He knows you're panicking, so he reach one hand to ease you down. "Since the first time we meet, idiot."

Since the first time?

"W-why didn't-"

"Because I don't want you to love because I am your soulmate. I want you to love me for who I am. For the flaws I have and for the real me. I don't have to fake myself. And you too." He smiles, reaching for your hand. "Like how normal people fall in love."

"I had your face etched in my mind since I was 10, sweetheart. And through years I watched you grow prettily until one day I heard Jaebeom hyung said your name and my heart has never beaten so fast."

"I saw you for the first time and I swear I wanted to grin so wide but I got to control myself when Jaebeom hyung introduced me to you."

"And the night later I couldn't sleep because the boys kept teasing and thank lord Jinyoung hyung snapped a picture of you and a candid of our first meeting."

"I can't sleeping knowing you will see all of me and judge me but I am too lucky to have you. You are so lovely and what did you do? Dreaming of watching the stars with other man."

You blink your eyes and immediately your eyes shrinks to slits. "Youngjae you killed the mood!"

He shrugs, watching your grow annoyed. "I think I deserve a kiss after explaining myself."

"No you don't."

"Yes I do." You shriek as he lifts you from your place and onto his chest, joining your lips together for the first time. Soft, wet, plump and 'fuck is this real?' are all you have in your mind.

When he pulls back to breath, you are no different, running out of oxygen.

"Now that you know I'm your soulmate, will you go and watch the stars with me?"

________________________________

All rights reserved © jinyoungmoans 

[ Our Gravity Youngjae Day Drabble Masterlist ] 

[kingleon420]

All I want to do is call Imzadi....

I want to let her know just how much I love her, miss her and how much I really do care for her. I want to say a thousand different ways how important she is to me and a thousand more ways how sorry I am for allowing myself to get so selfish and lost that I destroyed our bond that was beyond special. I want to tell her that I love her so much and am so obsessed with her that I can't go a single day without thinking of her. I want to let her know that the pain Ive caused her has made me just as sick and I also feel lost and without my best friend.

The person I am trying to see if I can move on with does not trust my bond or my friendship, especially after what I have done so even contacting Imzadi to try and make things right breaches more trust and if I had just told the truth things might be different. I didn't even think I was capable of such lies and cowardly actions. This lose-lose situation illustrates why I dont deserve forgiveness and will never forgive myself.

Everytime I speak to Imzadi all my feelings and love comes rushing back in an instant and Im once again head over heels in love and don't want to let anything go.

I feel like such a monster I dont know how I could allow myself to get to this point, Im so sorry that I allowed my love for you, my obsession with you to destroy a bond so special and to both of us something that meant a great deal.

I want our friendship and our bond back more then anything, I want my star trek friend and my comrade and the person who makes me laugh harder then anyone. I want to msg and talk to you about my everyday and hear about yours, I want to be with you so badly I could tear my own hair out if I had any. But I dont want my head and heart to keep falling back in love over and over knowing that it will never be returned in the same way, I will never have inner peace. I love you so much and want you so bad that sometimes I just can't see anything else and I will do the most selfish, lying and horrible things just so I dont lose you.

A part of me will always love you as more then friends and that will NEVER die because its too deep in me and our history but I need to learn the wisdom on how to deal with it without lying. I pine and long so hard after our past it clouds my judgment for the future.

Losing you, your respect, your love, your affection, your trust and my fur daughters has been so painful and knowing that I have done it all to you because I was too selfish and scared of losing our bond by trying to move on hurts me more then any dagger to the heart. I assure you I am not sitting on my end smiling and happy with everything ok. I know I was special to you too and the knowledge that I've killed that when you gave me your trust makes me feel sick everyday.

I dont want to make you cry anymore

I dont want to hurt you anymore

You are NOT worthless, have never been worthless and will NEVER be worthless to me.

You mean literally EVERYTHING to me and much to the dismay of anyone trying to be with me.

Do I end things with the woman I am trying to make things work with and attempt to repair the damage with Imzadi but knowing she will probably never love me romantically, or do I keep trying to move on and try make something new work but risk not talking to my best friend and soul mate for a very long time?

I can no longer hold my head up proudly and say I'm an honorable man or a good man, I cant even look at myself in the mirror. I became the one terrible thing I prided myself in NOT being, I became the very thing I despise. Im am sickened by my own character, how I can go from trustworthy and special and genuine to lying and pathetic and cowardly in the blink of an eye.

I want to talk to Imzadi more then anything and tell her everything in every detail and I would take every second of her anger and even telling me she hates me just to hear the sound of her voice but if I want to continue trying to also build back the trust of someone who does want me romantically and want to work towards a sturdy relationship here and now then I am unable to call or talk to Imzadi...this is so conflicting and frankly it feels like I dont deserve much of anyone.

I know every action I have made along with my silence tells the exact opposite but for whats its worth I have always loved you and obsessed over you and I will live with the pain I have caused you forever. I cannot say enough how eternally sorry I am that I betrayed you and our beautiful bond and hurt you when you need good honest people in your life. You did not deserve the pain I caused you and especially feom someone you thought was special, that you could trust.

I'm sorry that I couldn't just be friends and my love for you killed the most enriching and beautiful friendship I've ever had. Im sorry that my lies ended everything in an instant and left you wandering in oblivion and confusion, the thought that I was the cause of your spiraling makes my insides churn.

I'm sorry for everything and I know you will not want me to call you imzadi anymore but you will always be Imzadi to me.

I love you and I always will and I will have you in my heart and my mind until my last day. You are my soul mate. I will never go a single day where I dont think of you and regret deeply what I've done.

I know you don't want to be my significant other, especially now but without you it feels like a very big and very important part of me is missing. It sounds cheesy and stupid but my soul doesn't feel complete.

P.s I did get the Sea Shanty you sent me and yes it did make me smile, everything you send me does that, I see countless memes and things daily that I want to send you back. Im always thinking of you and missing you, it has never waned.

[queerlyhalloween]

Not to sound like the joker™️ but i hate western society. I know that hair and clothes aren't gendered, so do most of my mates, ive been working hard at unlearning the internalized transphobia that's just a part of being trans in the UK and actually ALLOWING myself to think about going on hormones and dressing in ways other than "ambigious as possible" despite the fact im non-binary

i grew myself a little mullet because ive not been working in the pub and wanted solid snake hair, ive allowed myself to look at my face and the long hair around it and not despair because i know that longer hair doesn't make me a woman, but the moment you go into a shop, or get takeaway or pass by people in the street its all "move out the way of this lady!" and "thank you, ma'am"

i dont want the gender option of 'other' on my ID i want to know 1 good reason why gender should be listed on an ID in the 1st place

ive just come back from the range and i had my hair up like some e-thot fuckboy, i had to go BACK to the range because they got my click and collect order wrong so ive got two members of staff looking over my order, im dressed in black jeans and a black masc-looking ripped shirt, mask covering half my face and as the manager's showing the kid who served me the receipt they go "oh I served that guy earlier" and the manager corrects them "its a lady". I say "im niether" and they both just stare at me like im a toddler. Im already panicking because the air feels the same way it did when some cunt came after me in the pub toliets. "dont worry about it :)" i say, they both turn back to the tills and completely ignore me.

Anyway, micro-aggressions, ive experienced a lot of them for many reasons over the course of my life and today ive decided to snap.

Not at the people in the range like, just in general.

I will never pass. That's just an element of trans euphoria i will never get to experience. Not right off the bat, anyway. Not where i live, and most likely not in my lifetime. Maybe for kids in LA or Brighton, and hey power to you guys man im happy for you, but people assume or guess m/f when they look at me and they will never get it right.

So when i see people on this site try and twitter etc rank "who's the most oppressed"™️ like a godamn smash bros tier list it blows my mind because of all the things you could spend your days doing thats what youre expending energy on?!

You could be the exact same age, race, sex, gender, sexuality, you could have the exact same disabilities, mental health conditions and money in your bank as another person on this site and you'd still never understand what they've been through. Our experiences, our families, our morals and lives are always gonna be different and the moment you try to write definitive rules on whose got it worse you've already lost and you're already wrong. Oppressed classes are not a fucking hivemind and pretending they are is only going to cause you more problems. I get the strong sense that some of you looked at the word intersectionality, went "ah yeah, i know what that means" having never read up on the matter, then proceeded to play the pain olympics.

And its creating a culture where kids feel the need to spills their souls online to justify living their lives!

You've not listed your disabilites in your bio so you're able-bodied. You're Irish but haven't listed your race so you're white. You're cis man so you've never played with gender and suffered as a result. You're asexual so clearly you're a cringeworthy baby who's never experienced a wrong-doing in their life.

The reverse is true too, if you list every aspect of yourself then you're automatically honest. The more opressed you are the less likely you are of causing harm to others. Psht, don't have a carrd in this day and age? What are you, a fraud? cishet white man playing make believe? Post a selfie or face the wrath of ozymandaus. What's privacy? It takes me 3 minutes to read the bio on this discourse side-blog so clearly they're an angel.

my mam abused me for years, she did the same to my brother when i left home at 18 and my dad drank himself to death. My nan, his mother, never believed me because my mam's a disabled woman with a lot of trauma, and at 14 how do you explain to the woman who takes you to the beach that it's WORSE because as she's beckoning you to the side of her bed so she can scream point blank in your face, or hit you, you're never truely sure, you're thinking about running away because of course she physically can't chase you but she can throw. And then where would you go if you did buggar off?

"You have to sleep sometimes" she used to say to me when I'd piss her off. Other days she told me horror stories about kids in care, and disabled people having their kids taken away, made me promise that I'd always love her and always be her baby, and I'd do that for her because she's my mam, she'd be satisfied then ignore me for a while. I grew up thinking that was entirely normal until i'd tell funny family stories at school and nobody would laugh. The closest I got to truely running away was when I changed my name and pronouns and her rejection, turned to vitriol one night and I so, so, nearly held a knife to my throat and simply fell forwards in the uni showers. Obviously I didn't do that.

But she's had a shitter life than me thus far so she's in the right, as the online black/white dichotomy states. I keep her at arm's length but I'm unable to cut her away without losing the rest of my family because I dared defy the role of eldest child and care for her as I've done my whole life, as is expected.

we need to take things on a case by case basis, and learn when stuff is none of our business.

"Hey! :) I see you've reclaimed (X) slur, without submitting the proper paperwork. Real quick tell me every trauma you've ever experienced or I'll write a callout post :) delete this anonymous message (as is your right) and i'll assume you as sus ❤"

you can only call yourself a dyke if on your 13th birthday, the moon's tender rays struck you through your bedroom window and gave you your first wet dream about girls.

Great, cool. I have no interest in calling myself a dyke, i cant call myself a lesbian because it makes me dysphoric, thats why im queer, but i can assure you that when 3 kids from catholic school pinned me under the bridge and threatened to cut me open for being a "dirty dyke tramp" they didn't play 20Qs with me first to check that i was actually a lesbian.

if your first thought is "well thats just misdirected homophobia, so youre not ACTUALLY a victim" log the fuck off and consider what's wrong with you. Because all our oppressors care about is sniffing out the wrong on you and beating it out, they dont care what breed of wrong it is.

so you're going to spend your day, the enlightened adult that you are, frothing at the mouth because some 15yr old dared call themselves butch despite them being OnLY a BiSexUAl? You're gonna say that trans woman deserves to be suicidal because yes she may be trans BUT she's from the UK, so clearly she loves her horrid country and government. You're gonna say that black lad deserves racial abuse because he's trying to focus on his studies rather than go to protests. That 19yr old who's living in poverty deserves it because they work for Amazon. Texans deserve to freeze to death because there are republicans in Texas.

You're going to harass a complete stranger coming to terms with the parts of themselves society has taught them are worthless at best because they're not doing it the way YOU think is right.

This post has not ended where I started it but I really dont care:

Some of you are so fucking desperate to be the bullies you never got to be in secondary school and it shows. But you're cowards. You can't just admit you want to divide and concur so you do it in a new woke way and when your time on this earth is done, you'll have commited the same pain that's been dealt to you and wonder why you died miserable in a world thats more or less the same.

okay to reblog but dont @ me for a debate because i have, like, real problems and will just block you

[cake-in-a-tin]

My thoughts rewatching all the Harry Potter movies back to back

forgive typos, and be warned - there's a lot...

the first two have a smaller amount of thoughts for some reason, idk why

 Philosopher’s Stone

teeny harry haha

that snake is so beautiful

no post on sundays bro

hi hagrid

how did the dursleys get off the island tho

aw harry is so teeny and innocent

ollivander’s entrance is so iconic, like i want to enter every room like that

hermione is so great already

and you are…

‘you’ve got dirt on your nose by the way, did you know?’

haha tiny malfoy

TREVOR! + neville

that death glare mcgonagall omg

oof snape really hates harry

it's leviooosa not leviosaaa

troll in the dungeon!!!

hi fluffy

ew norbert is gross to be completely honest

creepy malfoy staring at the window

malfoy being sassy wow

‘nighty night…’ whyyy filch?

oof ron are u ok

bye hermione

voldemort is kinda cute with his big eyes

harry really just killed quirrell jeez man

alas earwax

Chamber of Secrets

ah go away dobby don't be weird

yes the car with fred and george

oof bye uncle vernon haha

ah awkward let go of harry lockhart we hate u

haha ginny is iconic

rons face when the train comes omg

ron can drive? that's impressive…

ooh a voice scaryyy

hey colinnn

eat slugs - yas

let go of his arm lockhart

uh oh colin is petrified

hahaha snape annihilated lockhart wow

gosh moaning myrtle is annoying

tom riddle is such a weirdo hgh

ew spiders

lockhart is hilarious when he has lost his mind wow

yas fawkes

ew he just stuck the sword right through its head didn't he...

powerful sock…

go away lucius ur annoying

Prisoner of Azkaban

ugh aunt marge blow up already

sassy harry tm

tom is iconic

so is crookshanks tbh

the knight bus kinda sucks in the movie tho

yess lupin hi

ugh shut up trelawney

ah the best scene aka harry and draco being sassy towards each other

‘it’s killed meh!’

the other best scene: lupin, boggarts and the record player

love when they are eating sweets and just being good friends

yay marauders map - iconic fred and george

nice snowman also

my dad didn't strut and neither do i - yeah right...

yes leave hermione

trelawney stop being creepy

take that malfoy

harry third wheeling

yas remus save sirius

"old married couple" haha snape knows what's up

die peter lol

haha yes they will chop your leg off ron definitely

ugh harry stop being noble

haha yes mentioning the marauders

ew stop peter

oh no werewolf

sirius is so dramatic haha he cant stop turning into a werewolf my dude

bad idea yes ron i agree

oof fight him sirius

no sirius!

the dementorssss

no harry that's not a real patronus dude

nom eat the little soul nugget nice

ah no they're gonna kiss sirius nooo

scabbers did it ok... shut up ron

dumbledore just smacking ron's broken leg and being mysterious

and enter many time paradoxes

‘this is not normal’ hahahah wow harry

yess save buckbeak dudes

yas beautiful patronus dude

this music tho wow

au revoir sirius

I wonder how many stairs they ran up...

poor ron so confused

that bird just got squished no

don't leave lupin

please tell harry about the marauderss

i love lupin omg

ooh a firebolt thanks godfather

the ending face wow

Goblet of Fire

ooh nagini hello

yay frank you will die soon so enjoy your tea

dr who!

ah voldemort's creepy little hand tm

yes ron is covering his non existent boobs wow

hermione's so mad 4 some reason

yes cedric diggory in a tree

everyone has long hair why

isn't just any manky old boot mate

cedric amos and arthur are show offs

feet off the table!

i luv magik

wow krum is enjoying himself

Why is draco wearing a suit?

lucius is very ominous

think ur in luvvv ron

is there no winky in this? sad

harry is so awkward omg

bye hedwig find sirius even though the ministry cant

oh bonjour beauxbatons

wow so dramatic here come the durmstrang peoples

wow run filch ao athletic

ew the beauxbatons entrance is so weird and compared to the durmstrang one is kind of sexist

ow poor flitwick a fork to the hand that's gotta hurt

moody is so dramatic

dumbledore already shouting nice

why does he have so many bugssss

ah that is a creepy spider

poor neville he has to have cuppa with moody that sucks

yess fred and george back at it again

hermione ruining the vibe

HARRY POTTER DIDJA PUTCHA NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIYAH dumbledore asked calmly

what would happen if harry was just like "nope"? would he die that would be interesting

igh rita skeeter go away ur creepy my dude

hate it when ur eyes glisten with ghosts of ur past

yas sirius in a fire

"who are u talking to?" "im vlogging ron" (how it should have gone. harry should have a youtube channel just saying)

poor harry a third wheel yet again between madame maxime and hagrid ew

wow draco in a tree, why? so many people in trees this movie

"nyaaah"

malfoy as a ferret is my favorite character

my father will hear about thissss

omg rita get outttt

fight the dragonnnn

feel like someone should have stopped the dragon after it broke free... idk *shrugs*

it would be so boring if u were watching the tournament because you can't see anything that's happening most of the time, only for the 1st task and a bit if the 3rd task.

knew u wouldnt die harry, lose a leg - or an arm -pack it in all together? nevaaaaa

god just open it harry

ron ur so awkward...

harry spitting out his drink will never not be funny to me

oh yes the gorgeous dress robes

poor ron has it tough, having to dance with mcgonagall and having ro wear those robes...

*babbling bumbling band of baboons*

the twins are hilarious in this haha

aw neville!

snape is really violent can't 2 boys discuss their love lives or lack thereof in peace

ron's jealous of viktor krum haha

love harry just being so confused and saying "spectacular" when cedric speaks to him.

given the fact harry literally told him the task cedric didn't do that much to help.

ugh no myrtle stop

harry going "do i" when neville tells him he seems tense is such a mood

harry's hair when he was swimming haha

just leave them harryy omg too noble

harry holds his breath for a long time after his gills go away - longer than i can

fred and george making fun of harry having 'moral fiber' is exactly what i would do in the situation

mr crouch stop being weird

yes finally singing hoggy warty hogwarts

oh hi mr crouch, taking a nap in the forest are u? cool

i would say do not stick your face in the pensieve but that's just me

Dr Who changed a bit since i last saw him, he's a bit mental now...

snape is so iconic wow

"bubble juice sir?" bahaha sassy harry back at it again

this music is so great

i would freak out if i had to go in that maze it's so creepy and feels like it would be so filled with jumpscares just nope

"a cauldron? What are u guys gonna do - eat me? that's gross!" feels like it should be in the movie

aw baby voldemort is so cute

ugh just chop off another finger or something wormtail jeez so much drama

how is voldemort still alive - the cauldron is on fire??

the movie is also really missing voldemort dancing with the death eaters

u dont have hair my dude stop caressing ur bald head

voldemort has lovely long fingernails

lucius' blonde hair poking out from beneath his hood is so funny 4 some reason.

"i can touch u now" is really not a good sentence

bit awkward to return with a dead body...

its alright harry *shakes his head violently*

uh oh that's not professor moody its barty jr

Order of the Phoenix

halfway done woo

the intro music is still a jam the 5th time

that is big whinging not little whinging

hi big D what a great nickname...

uh oh dementorrrrr

yes mrs figg the most iconic character in the movies

harry looks a lot like frodo baggins

yay the order is rescuing him finally

yes remus and sirius and mrs weasley and everyone

ooh kreacher

jeez hermione attack him

crookshanks attacking the extendable ears is just what my cat would do

cute godfather godson moments yeass

arthur weasley trying to function as a muggle is just so wholesome

ugh not umbridge ew

yes clear those charges

aw padfoot yess

wow that's a lovely coat sirius

voldemort looks great in a suit wow

didn't harry see his parents die? why couldn't he see the thestral before?

yes luna!

oh shut up umbridge oh my goddd

yes ron u tell seamus like a good friend

sassy harry reaching full potential

ugh umbridge sucks wow

so evil torturing harry

yes weasleys wizards wheezes

luna is so pure and perfect

the friendship between her and harry is so amazing

yas tell umbridge, mcgonagall

trelawneys bad but she doesn't deserve to be kicked out by umbridge

oof professor dumbledore just straight up ignored harry

yes harry just say you're rubbish that will make people think your sane

yes hermione break the rules!

oof ginny is jealous of cho liking harryyyy

yay the room of requirement!

dumbledores army is so fabuloussss

nigel is amazing and i love him

wow hermione just knocked out ron haha

harry potter the boy who made cheesy inspirational speeches

wow ginny is so powerful

harry and cho are so awkward eeehhhh

just because you’ve got the emotional range of a teaspoon *cringy forced laughter*

occlumency lessonnssss yay what fun

cute christmas scenes wow

ooh the family tree and sirius' backstory yay

harry u aren't becoming like voldemort u are going through pubertyyyy its hormonesssssss

yay hagrid finally

oh no it's bellatrix get ready for crazinesss

poor sirius he keeps getting the blame for everything that's so unfair

is neville tall or is harry short, because there is a huge height difference

aw all the patronuses are so cute

uh oh here comes umbridge...

noo they are captured and dumbledores lying waaa

oof dumbledore is as sassy as harry at some points - "dumbledores got style"

no umbridge is heaf and shes fricking evilllll

grawp yess. hes kind of cutee

ron is jealous of grawp bahaha

sheesh snape chill

yes a bit of maraudrrss aahhhh

thats it? noo

aw fred and george comforting a little boy is too cute!

yes fred and george!!! disrupt those OWLS!!

no harry! he doesn't have sirius nooo

yes hermione fake it till u make it ( or until u get umbridge attacked by grawp )

yay the centaurs are here as well get herrr

'i must not tell lies' the sass omg

jeez how many prophecies are there wow

pranked, harry dude ur kind of rubbish

well done ginny you've made all the prophecies fall

yh id rather watch my friends die than give u the prophecy, don't really like them tbh

yas sirius!

the order yes

you're beautiful sirius

noooooo siriusss 😭😭😭😭

yooo voldemort my dudeee

hope the ministry has a massive roomba

the DA just come in to see harry writhing on the floor and are like 'cool'

nice one fudge finally realised he's back cool, cool

ah yes angsty harry tm

aw poor luna, her shoes are all stolen.

luna is an icon though

we have something voldy doesn't - noses hahahaha

Half Blood Prince

uh oh the dark mark is here

death eaters as well fun

fenrir greyback!!

oh no not this bridge! i went across it and i was scared af

dumbledore appearing out of nowhere is so funny

ew slughorn no

wow i need dumbkwdored tidying spell so badly

slughorn collecting people is kind of creepy tbh

im so glad i dont have as many staircases as the weasleys

oh yes narcissa and bellatrix being shifty

oops snape u probs shouldnt have done that

yess fred and george!!!

weasleys wizard wheezes looks amazinggg

uh not cormac mclaggen

oooh its "draco and mummy"

no fenrir we wanted to look at draco stroking a cabinet

yes arnold!

yes draco malfoy is a "creepy bloke" ronald

why is draco always wearing a suit??

yes draco is going to pigfarts!

ouch why would u stomp on his nose??

yez luna save him

noo dont let snape teach defense against the dark arts!! i miss lupin...

poor harry having to do potions again ugh

dun dun dunnn the half blood prince

poor seamus stuff is still exploding

haha dumbledore ships hermione and harry lol

baby tom riddle is creepyy

tom riddle and slughorn were bffs wow so cute

edgy draco in his loki suit

aw rons the only one listening

ugh cormac mclaggen is so gross nooo

haha ron is so rubbish at quidditch id be just like him

'the binding is fragile' hahaha excuses

harry sleeps with his potions book hheehe wow

wow sneaky draco

rons face when hermione mentions her snogging him haha.

uh oh cursed necklace alert

harry pottrr the boy who just knew

snape is so sarcastic wow icon (not really tho ew)

oh god they're talking about skin aahhh

noo harry stop being awkwarddddd sit downn

ew cormac stop eating profiteroles so suggestively ugh

haa rons outfit

ew lavender stopp

oh yes "felix felicis" makes ron great at quidditch

poor hermione she just loves ron thats all

aw hermione and harrys friendship is so nice

angsty draco standing in a tower

"bUt I aM tHe ChOsEn OnE" god harry so pretentious

luna is the coolest person there is, nice work harry

draco in a suit again looking sad he does that a lot

no draco ur apple!

oh nvm its back dw

ugh cormac sucks.  hermione why??

at least cormac did 1 good thing and vomited on snapes shoes

draco was lurking omgggg thats his vibe now

cant break an unbreakable vow - figured that out for myself thanks (sassy harry)

ew lavender stopppp

ooh noo ginny dont feed him a mince pie awkwarddd

thanks ron

stoppp ginny. harry can tie his own shoelaceee

why do they need to burn the burrow this doesnt happen in the books #not canon

wow everyones sassy including hermione now

also lav is an awful nicknname

aha tom riddle is still creepy

okay thats a lie slughorn u told him about horcruxes

uh oh ron loves romilda vane oop

harry thinks the moon is divine haha

Ron hugging a pillow then falling off the sofa in the background oh my gosh

slughorn is so useless

haha snapes face while rons saying hermiones name

draco being edgy again woowwww

lavender that is a death glare if ever i saw one

oh no draco is crying in a bathroom now like a moody teenager

let him cry in peace harry god man

'nyaaah' is dracos go to dueling sound

oops harry u kinda killed him a little bit.

no this is so awkwarddd ginny dont

just kiss like in the books after the quidditch match thats way better

yes the felix felicis

love harry potter like this its so funny

‘harry!’ ‘sir!’

not to mention the pincers *gestures awkwardly*

nice speech harry, now u have answers on the horcruxes

ooh back to tom riddle being creepy

yas harry and dumbledore field trip quality student teacher time

snape being edgy now wow everyone is in this movie

oops foreshadowing...

harry has precious blood apparently?

yay boat ride and smoothie

harry potter not harry water bro

noo bad just aguamenti right into his mouth Harry

yay new friends!!!

dumbledore ur gonna set harry on  fire careful my dude

ooh death eaterz

did draco change intot hat suit to impress the death eaters?

oop bye dumbledore

harry brooding in dumbledores office

yess RAB get wrecked voldemort

harry ur thick apparently?

aw cute friendship

Deathly Hallows Pt. 1

rusty logo wow

‘ello whoo are u

oh scrimgeour hi i dislike u dude

veey dramatic

aaawww hermione no

yas dudley being nice to harry and vernon listening to him and leaving

ron brooding wow

bye parents sad face

wow vernons old man

ooh its snapeee he looks loke he has a lot of contpur on

yay snape has a savey seat

pius is a great name

uh oh i dont wanna give u my wand voldy

dracos face haha

ugh do they have to watch nagini eat professor burbage gross

the dursleys house looks so empty

yay the cupboard happy memories and his baby toys cuteee

moody thinks that harrys gorgeous.

yay remus and tonksss

shut up mundungus

blimey hermionee

'just trying to diffuse the tension' hahaha lol

wow so many harrys lol

yh  wouldnt want to go in the motorbike tbh

uh oh death eaters

wow parkour harry

nooo hedwig - the saddest bit of this movie

yo voldemort wassup

oops the pylons fell down... just fly away good idea

nooo george's ear

jeez lupin y are u being crazy dude

george is saint like and holy aw so cute brother moments

uh oh bye moody u were a bit creepy tbh

ha lol harry a lot of people are going to die for u

harry stop being moody omg

wow george way to ruin the vibe dude

yo minister leave pls

ron just being ungrateful - u can turn out lights now ron lucky u

yay hermione you get a childrens book thats great

wow a snitch lucky u harry. hes so pleased with that. little does he know.... its a resurrection stone bro

give him the sword man

yay nice wedding

luna interrupting deep thoughts casually

xenophilius is creepy

ron and hermione staring at each other is a mood.

way to crash a wedding dude

hermione is the most competent out of all three it has to be said

i really want that bag of hermiones

shouldnt have said voldemory now the death eaters are here whoops

"hermione" *strokes face awkwardly*

sassy harry yas

oh yes grimmauld place

oof voldys having wand struggles

hi kreacher please leave ur creepy thanks

aw siriuzz room so cute sad hes dead

regulus arcturus black yay

ugh mundungus fletcher u suck dude

aw neville

oh no pie dude is the minister if magic now

uh shut up umbridge

feel like u dont need that many posters

sentimental piano playing wow

yo dobbyyyy

umbridge ruins everything omg

ron - u dont have a wife

haha harry getting out of the lift and walking in such a weird wayyy bahahaha

ew umbridge has moodys eye groosss

yas the ugly plates are still in her office

oops ron u just kissed that random dudez wife

nice suit harry

ouch splinch

lovely tent

kill the locket dude

dean thomas is on the run ooh fancy

yh harry stop letting voldemort in dude

harry stop being so moody bro

ooh watch snape on the map thats not creepy.

oh no snatchers...

ah u almost got caught dudes

ron ur so weak wow cant apparate or anything

lot of missing people...

haha a quarantine haircut

yes hermione ur brilliant

oh god ron stop chill

bye ron i guess lol

poor hermione

yas awkward dancing timee

awkward stares

kissy for the snitch. he must really miss ginny

uh oh its opening at the closee

vfd!!! an eyee!!!

ooh godrics hollowwww

oop its christmas eve whoopssss

oh a deathly Hallows

parents grave yay!

ur bathilda? nope im a snake boiii

bathilda is 1 creepy lady

what are u saying my dude????

ew snake lady

chaira are good defences agaunst snakes definitely

ah she jumped at them

looks like a nice campsite

wow now hermiones being sentimental

oop she sat on harrys wand

wait nvm

oooh a doe a deer a female deer

dont drown harry that would be awkward

omgbharry stop undressing

oof the locket strangling him

yay ron saved him yas dude

ron kill the horcrux

u tell him hermione

nice ron tell them u have been hearing voices

yes go see xenophilius the crazy dudee

aw ron ur so awkwsrd bro

their house is so cute

shut up ron god

yay we know about the deathly hallows now

xenophilius is so suspicious tho

why would you say his nameeee

noo snatchers

ooo ominous malfoy manor

draco dont doo ittt

yay dobby!

ah no hermione

aw draco looks sad in his little loki suit

yay dobby 'maiming and seriously injuring'

nooo dobby! he deserved so much better 😭

"hey guys welcome back to my unboxing video today we are opening dumbledores grave"

yay the elder wand wow

giving away ur position a bit dude by shooting stuff in the air

Deathly Hallows Pt. 2

snape hi ur brooding

lots of dementys

dramatic music

waaa dobby

yay bill and fleur

yo griphook what up

the sword was in a river bro

madam lestrange? no!

oops thats not dracos wand anymore wowww

wands are just like 'ya hiiii we have feelings too'

oop ollivander knows about the elder wand bros

ron looks great with a moustache tho

harry just broke the law jeez...

wow that cart looks fun

wow they fell from the cart nice

oh no ron broke the law too whoops

yay a dragon

lots of gold nice

yay the cup

oops they messed up nkw everything is multiplyinggg

griphook y are u evil my dude

yay ride a dragon

oops they fell no

yas they escaped

uh oh voldemort is onto them

that's a lot of dead people

oh no everyones looking for them

ah aberforth hi!

the other part of harry's mirror!

oop dumbledore was a secretive dude

ariana yas

neville!

i love neville hes so great now

yay all of the DA

luna!

ginny is being awkward

'shut up seamus' hhaha

aaa snape yooo

snape stop being a meanie

stop being angry harry

yas queen! mcgonagall!!!!

yay

uh oh voldemort is whispering to harry again

stop voldemort you need a cough sweet

yes everyone protect him

haha filch is a blithering idiot wow

i love mcgonagall

run harry

boom! seamus blow stuff up!

yay the knight peeps

uh yes theyre protecting harry and everyone

yes luna is so smart and iconic

go talk to a ghost harry

thats a lot of death eaters

go away voldemort no one likes u

yes go stab a crown harry

yay remus

fred and george aw

ron fake parseltonguing lol

nooo quidditch

lol peeps got disintegrated

go hermione stab the cup

yessss kisss!!!!

tonks and remus together wow

wow i hate voldemort's bald head with the weird veins

run neville!

yay ginny and neville

yay a little kiss for harry!

ooh the room of requirement

edgy draco back at it again

ooh the diadem

no dracooo

yh draco y didnt u give harry away?

aw ron loves hermione

uh oh fireee

nice work goyle

bye crabbe lol

yay hes saving draco

nice killed the tiara

oops voldemorts getting angry

snapes gonna dies dudes

runnnnn guys

lavenders being eaten

yay aberforth

yeet snapes dying

gosh naginis violent

“ew snape sorry i dont like u even tho u loved my mum” - what harry should have said

woops bye snape

freds death is too sad

nooo remus and tonks

go watch snapes life my dude

yess the always bit (i dont like snape but its iconic)

poor harry

its so sad that hes just sacrificing himself

his eye contact with ron omg im cryinggg

ooh yay his familyyy

he should have said 'its muffin time’ to the resurrection stone and it would be like 'cool bro here's your dead family'

u got this harry

yay teddy mention

"until the end" yas james

lets do this harry

wow voldemort why are you standing like a weirdo

yes harry be a brave man

byee harryyyy

oooh hes alive still

hi dumbledore

yes harry is a brave brave man

cool explain it to him dumbledore

bye dumbledoreeee

wow voldy u weakk bro

yas dracos alive get off me

aw neville u got this man

voldy yeeted that dead giant wow

ew snakey boi

nooo hes dead waa

poor draco such an awkward hug

oop neville what?

ok ur just making a speech that fine carry on

voldys very polite for a villain

yay harrys alive

haha dieee

run lucius wow

oof destroying the school harry really

naginis coming run hermione

u got dis neville

noo ron

yes molly!!!

y r u hugging dudes u arent friends... did u forget? oops..

ouch

bye snake boiii

neville is so iconic omg

kill him HARRY

noice

haha disintegrate voldemort

byeee

dont breathe in voldemort guys

wow harrys a mess

yay hagrid

hermione and ron are so sweet aw

harry yeet the wand

wow draco owns the wand and now harry has it

YEET

aw the friendship

yess 19 years later

wow that hair harry

all of their haircuts are tragic tbh...

should be albus remus potter... just sayinggg

THE END DUDESSSSS